Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania II (2015 Redo): Do It Again

Wrestlemania II
Date: April 7, 1986
Locations: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, New York City, New York/Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, Illinois/Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,585 (New York), 9,000 (Chicago), 14,500 (Los Angeles), 40,085 (Total)
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Susan St. James (New York), Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon, Cathy Lee Crosby (Chicago), Lord Alfred Hayes, Jesse Ventura, Elvira (Los Angeles)

Vince McMahon is in New York to welcome us to the show and introduce Ray Charles to sing America the Beautiful. As would become the custom, various images of American landscapes, military and run of the mill citizens are superimposed over the performance. Charles does an amazing rendition of the song and the fans give him the ovation he deserves.

Gene Okerlund is in Chicago to talk about the battle royal. By talk about I mean he mentions it and then throws it to the next interview.

The Magnificent Muraco vs. Paul Orndorff

Paul cranks on the arm and my goodness Muraco is sweating quite a bit. We hit a wristlock, which St. James calls an ancient Chinese technique. At least she sounds happy to be here so I can excuse some of here bad lines. Muraco gets in a right hand and they brawl to the floor for a double countout at 4:10. The fans loudly swear at the result.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. George Steele

Rating: D-. What the heck was that? I know Steele had been feuding with Savage for a long time but this was the best they could do for a major match? Total disaster here with the comedy not working and Savage just coming back and grabbing a win at the end. Savage winning was the right idea, but you could have cut a lot of the goofiness out of this to make for a better, or at least less bad match.

George eats another turnbuckle and chases the referee off.

Big John Studd and NFL player Bill Fralic talk trash before the WWF vs. NFL battle royal in Chicago. The announcement of Savage retaining in New York drowns out the yelling.

McMahon and St. James talk about the next match.

George Wells vs. Jake Roberts

Jake wraps the snake around Wells post match, making Wells foam at the mouth.

Mr. T. vs. Roddy Piper

Round two begins with Mr. T. claiming that Piper has a bunch of grease on his face. Mr. T. gets him into the corner and hammers away as these are clearly fake punches since both guys would be dead otherwise. Piper gets in some heavy rights in the corner and actually knocks him down to a big cheer from the crowd. Even more bombs have Mr. T. in trouble as the round ends.

Off to Chicago. The ring looks much smaller here.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Corporal Kirchner

Battle Royal

WWF: Pedro Morales, Tony Atlas, Ted Arcidi, Dan Spivey, Hillbilly Jim, King Tonga, Iron Sheik, B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell, John Studd, Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Bruno Sammartino, Andre the Giant

NFL: Jimbo Covert, Harvey Martin, Ernie Holmes, Bill Fralic, Russ Francis, William Perry

Rating: D+. Not much to see here and they made no secret of the fact that Andre was the obvious winner. The football players were really just a novelty so you could have a battle royal without looking like it was an easy way to get people on the card. They kept this short and to the point which helps things out quite a bit. Perry got the crowd going and Andre winning was the right call so no one is hurt here.

Back in New York, Piper says Mr. T. and William Perry are both cheaters. Piper denies cheating by shoving the referee.

Covert says he got cheated when someone jumped him from behind.

Iron Sheik says he proved wrestling is tougher than football.

We recap the end of the battle royal.

Tag Team Titles: British Bulldogs vs. Dream Team

Rating: B. Match of the night by far here with Dynamite taking one heck of a bump to end the match. The Bulldogs were a great team and they definitely deserved the titles and they did it in a tag match that went completely against the common tag team formula. Unfortunately it felt like it was much more about a way to get Osbourne on screen, which is only going to get worse.

Vince and Susan talk about the title change and preview the main event.

The Los Angeles announcers (Jesse Ventura, Elvira, Lord Alfred Hayes) preview their section of the card.

Hercules Hernandez vs. Ricky Steamboat

Uncle Elmer vs. Adrian Adonis

Hogan is ready to step inside a cage with King Kong Bundy after Bundy damaged his ribs a few months ago. All Hogan wants is for Bobby Heenan to try to get involved.

Funk Brothers vs. Junkyard Dog/Tito Santana

The announcers have an awkward chat as the cage is assembled.

In New York, Susan St. James picks Hogan.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

Hogan beats up Heenan and poses to end the show as Vince wraps it up from New York.

Ratings Comparison

Paul Orndorff vs. Don Muraco

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

George Steele vs. Randy Savage

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D-

Jake Roberts vs. George Wells

Original: F

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Roddy Piper vs. Mr. T.

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Velvet McIntyre vs. Fabulous Moolah

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Corporal Kirschner vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Original: D-

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Battle Royal

Original: B

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

British Bulldog vs. Dream Team

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B

Rick Steamboat vs. Hercules Hernandez

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

Uncle Elmer vs. Adrian Adonis

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: F

Tito Santana/Junkyard Dog vs. Terry Funk/Hoss Funk

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

Original: B-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Wrestlemania II is….weird. Like, really weird.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/09/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-2-what-the-hell-were-they-thinking/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/11/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-ii-three-times-the-suck/

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania I (2015 Redo): The First Big One

Wrestlemania I
Date: March 31, 1985
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,121
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

The opening video is a montage of shots of the matches tonight with the Wrestlemania logo in the middle. Not exactly high thinking stuff but it was a simpler time.

Tito Santana vs. The Executioner

S.D. Jones, a self described music man, is more than ready for King Kong Bundy on the biggest show ever.

King Kong Bundy promises a splash and a five count.

King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones

Bundy shoves him into the corner and hits a pair of splashes for the pin at 24 seconds. This is billed as nine seconds for a record but it takes nearly double that much time for the first splash to connect. To continue the lying, Bundy only got a three count. How can I ever trust someone like that?

Matt Borne, a pretty generic heel (I mean he wears sunglasses inside. How can he possibly be a good guy?), thinks Ricky Steamboat is just too nice of a guy and needs to get beaten up.

Matt Borne vs. Ricky Steamboat

Steamboat is a newcomer and in trunks instead of tights here. Feeling out process to start and a big chop puts Borne down. A headlock has Borne in trouble and a big atomic drop makes him gyrate a bit. The left handed Borne comes back with some shots to the ribs and a hard whip into the corner, only to have Steamboat come back with chops and another headlock. Ricky wins a slugout and drops a knee for two. Back up and the high cross body gives Steamboat the pin at 4:38.

Brutus Beefcake vs. David Sammartino

Intercontinental Title: Junkyard Dog vs. Greg Valentine

Tag Team Titles: US Express vs. Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff

Rating: C-. This was just for the historical value and little more. Sheik and Volkoff getting the titles was a major surprise but they would drop them back to the Express just a few months later. They kept the formula simple here as the Express dominated until the very end where the villains cheated to take the belts. Quick and efficient here to give the show something historic.

Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd

In the back, Andre laughs off the idea of retiring.

Richter and Lauper spin around in circles post match. They continue to be happy in the back after the match.

Roddy Piper/Paul Orndorff vs. Mr. T./Hulk Hogan

Piper decks Patterson and leaves. Orndorff wakes up and has no idea what happened but leaves without any violence.

We look back at the ending as everyone leaves.

Mr. T. says this is real and not for wimps. Hogan says that was what it was all about. Snuka says these men are his brothers. He would be gone soon after this.

Gorilla and Jesse wrap it up.

A package of stills from the show and the credits (a sign of the times) take us out.

Ratings Comparison

Tito Santana vs. Executioner

Original: C

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Ricky Steamboat vs. Matt Borne

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Brutus Beefcake vs. David Sammartino

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Junkyard Dog vs. Greg Valentine

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik vs. US Express

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C-

Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: F+

Lelani Kai vs. Wendi Richter

Original: B

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Mr. T. vs. Paul Orndorff/Roddy Piper

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

Forgive me on the first version. It was literally the first review I’ve ever done so I actually didn’t know what I was doing yet.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/08/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-1-just-a-big-house-show/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/10/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-i-it-all-starts-with-a-tag-match/

 

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com, follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1992 (2023 Redo): Yeah This One

Royal Rumble 1992
Date: January 19, 1992
Location: Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s time to get back to one of the classics as this one comes up on the request list pretty regularly. Since this is going to be my fourth time looking at it, odds are this is going to be the last time I look at it for a very good while. You probably know the big attraction by heart at this point and that should be more than enough to carry the whole thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with Vince McMahon narrating a list of Royal Rumble entrants, which does have a certain charm as he is SO into it.

Commentary runs down most of the card. There are only five matches, so a full list wouldn’t be too much to ask.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

The Express (Kato/Tanaka) has Mr. Fuji with them. Owen and Kato start things off as Heenan ignores everything else to talk about Ric Flair in the Royal Rumble (fair enough in this case). Kato’s O’Connor roll is countered into an armbar, followed by a running hurricanrana to give Owen two. Neidhart comes in for an armbar of his own before it’s off to Tanaka for another showdown.

Tanaka bounces off of Neidhart as commentary talks about Neidhart’s questionable sanity. A spinebuster sets up Owen’s middle rope elbow as commentary finally starts talking about the match in front of them. That lasts all of ten seconds as we switch over to the Mountie winning the Intercontinental Title from a rather sick Bret Hart (not quite) at a recent house show. Heenan: “He had a 104 degree temperature. I’ve wrestled with an 113 degree temperature! It’s not that big of a deal!”

Neidhart hits a double clothesline to set up Owen’s high crossbody, followed by a spinwheel kick for two on Kato. Tanaka gets in a kick from the apron though and a Fuji cane shot lets the villains take over. Kato is back up with a jumping back elbow for two as Heenan tries to leave to consult with Flair before the Rumble. We get our first “fair to Flair” of the day as Owen does Breth’s chest first into the buckle bump. A superkick gives Tanaka two so he does it again, setting up a headbutt to the, ahem, lower abdomen (even commentary isn’t sure on that one).

Owen fights up and gets over for the tag but the referee doesn’t see it thanks to a well timed distraction (because the classics always work). Instead a belly to belly plants Tanaka for two, leaving them both down. Neidhart gets drawn in again, allowing a double clothesline for two on Owen. Another superkick drops Owen again but he gets back up with a double dropkick. The hot tag brings in Neidhart to clean house as everything breaks down. Owen hits a heck of a suicide dive on Kato, setting up the Rocket Launcher for the pin (Monsoon: “Sayonara baby!”) at 17:19.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that I miss in modern wrestling: take some talented people and put them in the ring together for a good while with little on the line. I get why it wouldn’t go over well today, but dang it is a nice flashback to a different era. The New Foundation wasn’t exactly as good as the Harts, but they were good enough to put in a nice effort like this one here.

We look at the Mountie defeating the sick Bret Hart to win the Intercontinental Title. Mountie kept the beatdown going after the match until Roddy Piper made the save. Another sneak attack from Mountie didn’t work, but now we have a title match.

Jimmy Hart is ECSTATIC over the Mountie winning the title. Mountie promises to beat Roddy Piper up, while taking his manhood AND his skirt.

Roddy Piper says we’re looking at one of the original Village People in the Mountie. First, Mountie wants to take Piper’s integrity, but Piper doesn’t have any! Then he’s coming for Piper’s manhood. Piper is here to wrestle, but he doesn’t know what Mountie is here to do. Tonight, Piper can win two titles and now he has to go win the first one.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Mountie is defending and has Jimmy Hart in his corner. Piper unloads to start and Mountie bails outside fast. A Hart distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, followed by some leapfrogs back inside. You can only do that to Piper for so long though as he sends Mountie into the buckle a few times. There’s a bulldog out of the corner as commentary bickers about how many rights Heenan has.

Hart’s distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, including some face first rams into the buckle. A sunset flip gives Piper two as Heenan again claims the 113 degree temperature, which he survived thanks to half of a children’s Aspirin. Back up and Piper sends him over the top, only to have Mountie skin the cat. Piper sends him into an interfering Hart though, grabs the sleeper, and wins the title at 5:20.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing, but was anyone buying the Mountie as having a chance against Piper? The whole thing was a way to transition the title off of Bret to set up the eventual showdown with Piper at Wrestlemania. Piper winning a title after all those years as a star is great to see though and that was the other major point. Bad match, but a good result.

Post match Hart tries to come in with Mountie’s shock stick, which Piper takes and uses on the Mountie instead. We do get a classic Fink AND NEEEEW moment, with Piper getting to hold the title for a great moment.

Hulk Hogan is ready to win the Royal Rumble, where he won’t have any friends because he wants the WWF Title back.

The Bushwhackers and Jamison (a disturbingly nerdy guy with a bad suit and a sock sitting out of his pocket) are ready for the Beverly Sisters’ final fling. They’ll beat up the Genius too.

Bushwhackers vs. Beverly Brothers

Jamison and the Genius are here too. We hit the stall button to start, with two and a half minutes passing before the Brothers jump Luke to start the physicality. Luke fights up and bites the back of Blake’s tights, setting up a double forearm to put the Brothers outside. We settle down to Beau vs. Butch as commentary talks about Jack Tunney actually doing something lately.

Beau gets in a cheap shot to take over as commentary talks about 20,000 fans here (17,000 official, so at least it’s not that far off). Everything breaks down again and the Bushwhackers clear the ring for the second time as we are somehow almost seven minutes into this. The Beverlies both try sneaking up from behind to even less avail but this time Butch goes outside to beat up Beau. A cheap shot to Luke finally gets us into a more traditional match, with the Beverlys taking turns with the elbows. Jamison: “Stop cheating!”

A backbreaker puts Luke down again and there’s a headbutt to the back for two. Heenan rants about his tax money going to Jamison as this match just keeps going. Luke gets beaten up again as genius slaps Jamison. One shot is finally enough for Luke to get over for the tag to Butch so house can be cleaned. The Battering Ram hits Blake and a running headbutt gets two on Beau. The referee has to get Luke out though and Blake hits a top rope ax handle to pin Butch at 14:56.

Rating: D-. Yowza this was a horrible match, with nothing good in the way of wrestling, a bunch of repetitive stalling and a lame ending. This was one of the worst pay per view matches I’ve ever seen from the WWF and the time would have been better used by airing an old pinball tournament. Awful in every sense.

Post match the Bushwhackers clean house and hold Genius back so Jamison can kick him in the shin. Good for him I’m sure.

The Legion Of Doom is ready for the Natural Disasters because they’ll fight anyone. Hawk wants the Disasters’ tongues hanging out like dead deers’.

Tag Team Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Legion Of Doom

The Disasters, with Jimmy Hart, are challenging. Hawk wastes no time in swinging away at Typhoon and everything breaks down quickly. Earthquake comes in and shrugs off Hawk’s dropkick, only to miss a (decent actually) dropkick attempt of his own. Gorilla: “He wouldn’t have hit Sky Low Low with that one!” Well no, as it would have been two feet above Low Low’s head. Think Monsoon.

It’s off to Animal for a double clothesline and knockdown, followed by Animal’s failed slam attempt to put him in trouble again. That lasts all of three seconds as Typhoon comes back in and gets his arm cranked, allowing the tag back to Hawk. A backbreaker cuts Hawk down and Typhoon adds a running crotch attack to the back. The required bearhug goes on before Earthquake steps on Hawk’s ribs.

Another bearhug goes on as Heenan is trying to pay someone to go to the back to get Flair information. This one is broken up just as quickly as the other, leaving Earthquake to miss a splash in the corner. Hawk manages a middle rope elbow to the head and it’s finally off to Animal to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and they fight to the floor, with only Typhoon beating the count back in for the win at 9:24.

Rating: D+. While it wasn’t good, this is just slightly better than the other tag match and that is what matters here. At the end of the day, the match was about setting up something in the future, even if that didn’t quite happen. The match wasn’t exactly fun to watch, as Earthquake and Typhoon are only going to be able to do so much in the ring. Throw in the LOD being a bit limited in their own right and this was about as good as it was going to get.

Post match the brawl is on and the Disasters are cleared out.

In the back, Jimmy Hart and the Disasters rant a lot.

Roddy Piper is very happy with his win and dedicates it to his son Colt.

After a clip of the famous Barber Shop split, Shawn Michaels doesn’t care that Marty Jannetty is out of the Rumble because Shawn is going to win it anyway.

Ric Flair has drawn #3 and doesn’t care, because he’s Ric Flair.

Randy Savage is ready to get back to the top of the mountain.

Sid Justice is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Repo Man is ready to repossess the WWF Title.

British Bulldog is ready to win another battle royal, just like he won another one last year at Royal Albert Hall in London.

Jake Roberts is ready to get what he needs and beat up Randy Savage at the same time. Trust him.

Mr. Perfect and Ric Flair are ready for the latter to prove that he is the REAL World’s Champion.

Paul Bearer is ready for 29 caskets as the Undertaker is WWF Champion again.

Hulk Hogan is ready for it to be every man for himself in the Royal Rumble so he can get the title back. Hogan was sounding rather whiny and a bit paranoid here.

Jack Tunney gives us a brief welcome and says may the best man win.

WWF Title: Royal Rumble

For the vacant title (after Hulk Hogan cheated to take it back from Undertaker) with two minute intervals. British Bulldog is in at #1 and Ted DiBiase is in at #2 as Heenan is already calculating odds on Flair’s ring time. Bulldog hammers away but charges into an elbow in the corner. DiBiase grabs some suplexes as Heenan suggests going through the ropes and hiding to kill time.

Bulldog gets thrown over the top but hangs on and runs back in to toss DiBiase, leaving Heenan upset. Ric Flair is in at #3 (Heenan: “NO!” Monsoon: “YES!”), sending Monsoon into a statement about how no one from entrants #1-5 has ever made it to the end. Heenan apologizes for not being able to be objective as Bulldog grabs the gorilla press. Flair gets in a poke to the eye for a breather as Jerry Sags is in at #4.

Bulldog gets double teamed as Heenan wants Flair to go rest in the corner. A double clothesline gets Bulldog out of trouble and there’s a dropkick to get rid of Sags (Heenan: “OH NO!”). Haku is in at #5 and goes after Flair (Heenan: “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HAKU??? HAVE YOU GONE NUTS???” You know, because HAKU is most well known for his calm, rational demeanor), who actually takes him down and drops a knee to the head. Bulldog gets rid of Flair and Shawn Michaels is in at #6.

A superkick drops Flair fast (not yet the big time finisher) and another….lands in the general vicinity of Bulldog’s head as Heenan wants a stiff drink. We also start the weird timing as Heenan says Flair has been in over ten minutes despite the match not even going for ten minutes yet. Tito Santana is in at #7 and has Flair upside down in the corner (Heenan: “PERFECT! GET OUT HERE!”).

Flair slips out and gives Santana a belly to back suplex, followed by a low blow to Bulldog (Heenan: “I’d do that to my grandmother if I had to!”). The Barbarian is in at #8 (Heenan: “When I managed him, he barely liked me!”) and everyone brawls around without much going on. The Texas Tornado is in at #9 and goes right after Flair as Heenan is sounding increasingly desperate. Things slow down even more (fair enough) as the Repo Man is in at #10, giving us Bulldog, Flair, Michaels, Santana Barbarian, Tornado and Repo Man.

Barbarian and Flair double team Tornado and it’s Greg Valentine (in his bizarre face run) at #11. Naturally he goes right for Flair as Heenan talks about how the Perfect Plan called for Flair to go no more than 30 minutes. Flair kicks Repo Man low and it’s Nikolai Volkoff (Heenan: “300 pound Lithuanian!”) in at #11. Valentine grabs the Figure Four on Flair (Heenan….well you can just imagine) as Volkoff is tossed out to clear some of the ring. The Big Boss Man is in at #12 to pick up the energy a bit.

There goes Valentine, with Repo Man and Bulldog following him. Tornado is out as well as Heenan is begging Flair to get away from Boss Man. Santana and Michaels are both out and it’s Hercules at #13. Flair chops at Barbarian (Heenan: “NO RIC!”) and gets gorilla pressed for his efforts. Hercules dumps Barbarian (saving Flair in the process) but gets tossed as well. Boss Man clotheslines Flair but misses a charge and gets low bridged out, leaving Flair alone in the ring.

It’s Roddy Piper in at #14 and Heenan is beside himself as Flair is in even bigger trouble. Piper beats him up and takes it to the floor to keep up the beating. Back in and it’s an airplane spin into the sleeper to knock Flair mostly out. Jake Roberts is in at #15 to sit in the corner as the sleeper continues. Roberts goes after Piper (Heenan: “Thank you Jake!”) before hitting the short arm clothesline (Heenan: “You no good….”). Piper makes the save (Heenan: “It’s not a skirt! It’s a kilt!”) and Flair puts the Figure Four on Roberts. That’s broken up by Piper (Heenan: “You no good skirt wearing…..”) and it’s Jim Duggan in at #16.

Even Monsoon is praising Flair’s conditioning at this point as Heenan thinks Hulk Hogan is behind the order of entrants. Duggan punches Flair into the corner as Roberts does the same to Piper. It’s IRS in at #17 and it’s a double noggin knocker from Duggan to Roberts/Flair, giving us a Flair Flop. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 and he still looks weird in those long tights. Heenan: “He’s wasting time!” Monsoon: “He is not!” Heenan: “I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.”

Piper chops on Flair in the corner but hands him off to Roberts, who can’t get rid of him. The Undertaker is in at #20 and Heenan is….oddly kind of calm about it. That gives us Flair, Piper, Roberts, Duggan, IRS, Snuka and Undertaker, with Snuka being tossed almost immediately. Undertaker grabs Flair by the throat, with Heenan declaring that everything is over. Duggan saves Flair and gets kicked low by Undertaker (that’s a weird visual) as Randy Savage is in at #21, meaning Roberts bails straight to the floor (not out).

Undertaker jumps Savage from behind so Piper comes back in, only to get kneed over the top by Savage. Hold on though as Savage dives over the top to go after Roberts again….but Undertaker throws Savage back inside, apparently because he wasn’t THROWN over the top. Ignore that this goes against previously established rules, but since when has that mattered? Flair stomps on Savage in the corner and hits Undertaker low, the latter of which doesn’t seem to matter.

Berzerker is in at #22 and hammers on various people as Heenan panics at Flair going after Savage. Undertaker and Piper choke Flair until Virgil is in at #23. Flair survives an Undertaker elimination attempt and it’s Colonel Mustafa in at #24. Monsoon refers to Flair as “Martel” twice, even as Duggan punches Flair in the face. Piper beats on Flair in the corner and it’s Rick Martel in at #25.

Heenan thinks some of the bigger names have gotten some great luck in the drawing, again forgetting an announcement on Superstars that some of the bigger names were guaranteed later numbers. Mustafa is out and everyone brawls….until Hulk Hogan is in at #26 (Heenan: “OH MY GOD NO!”). The brawl is on again as Heenan starts bargaining with God to let Heenan win. Hogan gets rid of Undertaker and Berzerker back to back with Virgil and Duggan going out at the same time.

Skinner is in at #27 as Heenan thinks Flair should be the Real World’s Champion no matter what. Sgt. Slaughter is in at #28 as Skinner is out. Hogan and Piper go at it, with Monsoon sounding almost surprised because they’re friends, despite having one of the most famous rivalries in wrestling history. Flair officially sets the all time record as Sid Justice is in at #29 to quite the reaction.

More brawling ensues as Warlord is in at #30, giving us a final grouping of Flair, Piper, IRS, Savage, Martel, Hogan, Slaughter, Sid and Warlord. Hogan slams Flair at the top and they both roll outside (not eliminated) to fight some more outside. Sid dumps Slaughter as Monsoon can’t believe that Flair is still here. Granted he also thinks Flair has been here for an hour when we’re still coming up on an hour into the match.

Piper pulls IRS out by the tie and Sid dumps Warlord to get us down to six. Sid gets rid of Martel and Piper, leaving us with Savage, Sid, Hogan and Flair, which makes me want to play Super Wrestlemania. There goes Savage as well, leaving Hogan to punch Flair over the top. Hogan goes to dump him but Sid tosses Hogan instead. Ever the nice guy, Hogan grabs Sid’s arm because “you stole my belt”, allowing Flair to dump Sid (with Hogan’s help) for the win and the title at 1:02:02. Heenan: “YESx50!”

Rating: A. Yes it’s still great and it still works as well as probably any Rumble would for almost ten more years. Flair has a great performance in setting the record and never once seeming like he was laying around for any extended period of time. You also have a star studded lineup with all kinds of people feeling like dark horse candidates, meaning there was little down time. Then of course there’s Heenan, who has the call of a lifetime as you can picture him losing his mind at everything falling apart. Monsoon laughing at Heenan when Flair comes out early but then respecting Flair by the end is great too, making this a masterpiece.

Post match Hogan and Sid bicker a lot, setting up Wrestlemania. I remember watching this at around four years old and wondering why Hogan was upset when he was eliminated without breaking any rules. There was no reason for him to be angry over this and he was just whining.

In the back, Jack Tunney presents Ric Flair with the title, allowing Flair to give the incredible “with a tear in my eye” speech, talking about how this is the title that matters the most in the world. Flair, Perfect and Heenan all WOO in celebration. Perfect: “We’re not the kind of guys to say we told you so but….we told you so!” After Flair cracks up at that one (and Gene gets in the infamous “PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT!”), Gene signs off and sends us to the highlight package to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a weird show as the main event is the ONLY thing that matters (though the Piper title win was a very nice moment) and everything else is pretty minor. The problem is one of those two matches is horrible and another is pretty bad, bringing the overall rating down a bit. That being said, this is the definition of a one match show and there is little reason to watch anything but the Intercontinental Title match and the main event. One is a feel good moment and the other is an all time classic, so we’ll call this quite the success.

WWF, 2022, 1992, Redo, Royal Rumble, New Foundation, Orient Express, Mountie, Roddy Piper, Jimmy Hart, Hulk Hogan, Bushwhackers, Beverly Brothers, Jamison, The Genius, Natural Disasters, Legion Of Doom, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Sid Justice, Randy Savage, Undertaker

Ratings Comparison

New Foundation vs. Orient Express

Original: C+
2013 Redo: B-
2018 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C+

The Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

Original: B
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

Original: F+
2013 Redo: T (The Worst Match In Royal Rumble History)
2018 Redo: F
2023 Redo: D-

Legion of Doom vs. Natural Disasters

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B
2023 Redo: A-

I’m pretty much done with this show after this one, though it’s still rather great.




WWF Cage Match Compilation Volume I: I Could Get Used To This

So this is something new that I’m trying, as I recently purchased access to an INCREDIBLE treasure trove of wrestling from around the world and throughout history. It’s almost exclusively NOT WWF/E stuff so expect quite the variety. There is all kinds of stuff that I’ve never even heard of before (including a weekly French series from the early 90s for a real twist). I’m not sure how often I’ll be doing these but more wrestling is a good thing (in theory).

WWF Cage Match Compilation Volume I

Ok so it’s mostly non-WWF but they do have a collection of about 70 cage matches from the company, including quite a few fan cam recordings from house shows. That is going to make for quite the look back, though some of these are from major shows that you have probably seen before. I’ll be doing them at random in a series so let’s get to it.

Superstar Billy Graham vs. Butch Reed
Date: October 16, 1987
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,700
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Nick Bockwinkel

This is from Graham’s last run in wrestling and he only had a handful (ok two big handfuls) of matches before he hung it up for good. These two feuded for a good while during this run, though Graham’s body is rapidly deteriorating as he is already wrestling with a replaced hip and it’s only getting worse.

Before the match, we need to put the cage together (a thing that I miss but is completely impractical in the days of just hanging it above the ring). While that is taking place, we get some pre-match promos.

Graham talks about having Reed in the bearhug and now he’s ready to be locked in the cage so no one can interfere whatsoever.

Reed is ready to be in there man against man, and the REAL man is the only one leaving. Guess who that is supposed to be.

We go to the actual match and Reed jumps him on the way in to start fast. Graham is sent head first into the cage as Bockwinkel says this is like a prison cell. What kind of jails do they have in the AWA territory??? Anyway, Reed sends him into the cage and then uses Graham’s own bandanna to tie him to said cage. Reed charges into a knee though and Graham slips out.

This time it’s Reed going into the cage and Graham gets to choke with a shirt. It’s too early for Graham to get out as Bockwinkel thinks Graham’s knee might be his Achilles tendon. You were one word away from a perfect illustration. Reed gets caught trying to escape and Graham grabs a quickly broken sleeper. The ram into the cage lets Reed crank on the leg but Graham pulls him down.

A low blow doesn’t do much to Reed, who goes right back to the bad hip. Reed gets caught trying to climb out and the bearhug has him in trouble. That’s broken up with another ram into the cage but Graham pulls him down again. With the climbing not working, Reed pulls out some brass knuckles but misses a few shots, allowing Graham to use them on Reed instead. Graham dives (work with me here) out of the door to win at 11:04.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t exactly a great technical showdown, but that’s not what they were going for here. This was about Graham getting some revenge on Reed by hitting him in the face/sending him into the cage. The fans were still reacting to Graham and you could see the (super) star power, but the injuries were catching up to him way too fast to really be effective in a bigger way. Reed was good as usual, and for a big house show cage match, it worked well.

WWWF Title: Bruno Sammartino vs. Stan Hansen
Date: August 7, 1976
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 22,000
Commentator: Vince McMahon

Bruno is defending (of course) and this is a rematch from Showdown At Shea, which was a rematch from when Hansen broke Bruno’s neck. We get the ESCAPE ONLY explanation and Hansen looks like a monster during his introduction. Bruno gets a heck of a reception (shocking I know) and after some Big Match Intros, we’re ready to go. Hansen jumps him to start but Bruno fights right back and sends him into the cage to an awesome roar. Some stomping puts Bruno down for a bit but he fights back again and sends Hansen into the cage.

It’s too early for Hansen to escape so he hammers away some more, earning a stomping from Bruno for a change. A shot to the ribs slows Bruno down but Hansen misses the elbow. Bruno grabs a reverse chinlock (or Boston crab according to Vince) before just stepping on Hansen’s face. What looks to be a low blow gets Hansen out of trouble but Bruno is still fine enough to catch him trying to escape.

We get some boots to Hansen’s head (there is something awesome about the way Bruno swings his leg so wide as he kicks someone) so Hansen goes with another low blow (or “foul” as Vince calls it). Another escape attempt is cut off for another ram into the cage, this time busting Hansen open. Bruno ties him in the ropes and unloads on him as Hansen is almost out. One more big right hand drops Hansen and Bruno walks out to retain at 10:43.

Rating: B-. This was a good old fashioned fight as Bruno didn’t so much care about the title as much as he wanted revenge on Hansen. Bruno always looked best when he was ticked off and just wanted to hit someone in the face over and over, which is exactly what you got here. You can feel the emotion when Bruno is in the ring, as even someone like Hansen is just overwhelmed. Very fun match and the crowd’s reaction to Bruno is incredible.

Post match the rather bloody Hansen gets up and poses before collapsing again. Vince: “Hansen, absolute annihilated here.” That’s about the size of it, yeah.

Andre The Giant vs. Big John Studd
Date: September 24, 1983
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,983
Commentators: Dick Graham, Gorilla Monsoon

We see Andre walking through the tunnel in the back and my goodness it’s such an imposing visual. That’s a big part of the appeal and dang does it work. Studd jumps him on the way in and stomps Andre down in the corner (that’s a weird sight) but the ram into the cage is blocked. Andre sends him into the cage a few times and Studd is already busted open.

Some rams into the other cage walls (just to be a completionist) have Studd staggered until he elbows Andre in the face a few times. Studd tries to leave so Andre sits on him for a rather painful cut off. Back up and Studd grabs a front facelock but gets cut off rather quickly for daring to try an escape.

Andre has to dive to cut off another escape attempt as Gorilla isn’t sure what size boot Andre wears. Back up and Andre sends him into the cage a few times but Studd hits a big clothesline. Studd’s next escape attempt is cut off with a legdrop to the back of the head and there’s the slam (good for $10,000). Andre goes nuclear by heading up top for a super sitdown splash. Since Studd is pretty much crushed beyond repair, Andre walks out to win at 10:04.

Rating: C+. Remember how I said the visual of Andre walking to the ring was awesome? The visual of him jumping off the top to crush an innocent human being is even better. I’ve seen him do it before but if there is a bigger ultimate finish in the WWF’s history, it’s a new one on me. Studd was one of the few people who could match size with Andre and he did well enough here, but there was no stopping the force that was Andre.

WWF Title: Bob Backlund vs. Jimmy Snuka
Date: June 28, 1982
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentator: Vince McMahon

Backlund is defending and it’s escape only again, albeit this time ONLY through the door (As apparently Backlund’s manager Arnold Skaaland thinks Snuka is too good at jumping over the cage. That’s quite a cop out for a heroic champion.) Snuka has Captain Lou Albano with him, like any good villain of the day should. Backlund tells him to get inside before grabbing him by the hair to start fast.

Some stomps have Snuka in trouble and Backlund strikes away, even headbutting Snuka without hurting himself. Snuka fires off some chops and knees as this is much more of a brawl so far. It’s Backlund going into the cage first as Vince talks about how there are TWO opponents each here, getting all philosophical you see. There’s the big whip into the cage and a backbreaker keeps Backlund in trouble.

The middle rope forearm/headbutt connects but it’s way too early for Snuka to escape. Backlund gets all fired up and punches away, setting up the catapult into the cage. Snuka is busted open and you know (at least you should) that a ticked off Backlund is going to go after that. A shot to the chest cuts Backlund off again though and an elbow….does nothing as pins don’t count here. Backlund gets suplexed but the splash off the top of the cage misses, allowing him to escape and retain at 10:25.

Rating: C+. This was just starting to get good when it wrapped up and that’s rather annoying. The splash off the cage looked like the big epic finish and Backlund escaping after it misses worked well enough, but the anger and hatred were just starting to flow here when they wrapped up. This was a huge feud at the time though and it’s easy to see why Snuka was a huge star the second he turned.

Post match Backlund says he kind of liked getting to hurt Snuka like that. He likes going out the door anyway because he wants more of a contest than a fight. Backlund respects Snuka’s power and athleticism and he’s ready for his next challenger, who might be Cowboy Bob Orton.

Vince gives us a quick backstory, saying Backlund and Orton were going to wrestle in high school but Backlund got hurt and couldn’t do it. As a result, Orton thinks he’s a coward but Backlund is ready to prove that he’s the better man. Backlund doesn’t have much say in who he faces but he’s requesting to face Orton. Total “bye golly’s” in this five minute interview: four. Oh and a “hello mom and dad”.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Kamala
Date: January 11, 1987
Location: Maple Leaf Gardens, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Johnny V.

Hogan is defending and I’m surprised it took this long to get to one of his matches. In a rare moment, this is described as a ten foot cage instead of the traditional fifteen. Kamala has the Wizard and Kim Chee with him to uneven the odds a bit. Hogan has his face painted up and slaps his stomach on the way to the ring so Kamala uses the belt to beat the racial stereotypes out of him. Hogan fights back and chokes with the bandanna but has to block some cage shots.

There’s the back rake but Kamala sends him into the cage as Monsoon talks about Whipper Billy Watson. A leg dive keeps Kamala inside but he chops Hogan down. The splash connects as Gorilla talks about Kamala’s cannibalistic tendencies but it’s already Hulk Up time. The bloody Hogan sends him into the cage over and over and there’s quite the slam. Hogan drops the leg so Chee and the Wizard jump the referee and come in. That doesn’t work for Hogan, who beats all three of them up and goes through the door to retain at 6:19.

Rating: C. The match was nothing but Hogan came off like an absolute superhero here. He shrugged off Kamala’s biggest stuff, beat up the cheating managers, and walked out to retain in short order. The fans were going nuts for this too and I can’t say I blame them, as this is the Hogan that felt like the strongest force in the universe. How could you cheer for him?

Post match the villains go after him again and get beaten up, again! Posing ensues.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff
Date: January 3, 1987
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

Hogan is defending and this is a famous one, from Saturday Night’s Main Event #9. Before the match, Orndorff’s manager, promises to make Hogan the paper that lines a bird cage. Danny Davis is here as the second referee and yeah that is going to mean shenanigans. In the back, Hogan says the cage is the last resort. They both come out to Real American in a still awesome angle. Orndorff grabs the belt again for some shots but Hogan reaches for the ankle.

Hogan catches him on top as well, with Orndorff having to be dragged back over (Ventura: “Hogan would not be the champion if Mr. Wonderful was bald.” That line has cracked me up for over thirty years now.). Back down and Hogan punches away but Orndorff catches him on top. Orndorff misses some elbows and the comeback (I think?) is on but Davis doesn’t have the door unlocked in time. Some knees to the head rock Hogan again and stereo rams into the cage leave both of them down. They both climb up and get to the ground….at the same time at 6:45, with one referee each saying they both win.

It’s a tie, so we’ll get them back inside and keep going. Back from a break with Orndorff throwing him back inside and getting in some cheap shots. A fist drop triggers the comeback and Ventura isn’t happy. Some rams into the cage set up a backbreaker of all things into the legdrop. Heenan tries to break it up but Hogan shrugs him off, beats them both up and leaves to retain at 16:34.

Rating: B-. This was billed as the first cage match in network television history (accurate) and it felt like a big deal. Hogan vs. Orndorff had been a massive feud so giving them this big of a blowoff made sense. The stuff in the middle added some drama and as usual, the chemistry was rolling between these two. Hogan was off to something bigger though, which Orndorff would have to settle for the end of the biggest run of his career.

In the back, Heenan promises to get the footage of the match and show it to Jack Tunney because Orndorff is the champion. I still want one of those WWF duffle bags.

Hogan isn’t worried about Heenan’s plan.

Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Randy Savage/Zeus
Date: December 27, 1989
Location: Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

This is The Match from No Holds Barred: The Movie/The Match. Since the movie was falling apart, Vince McMahon tried this idea: get the movie on pay per view and see this match as well, as the big blowoff to the Hogan vs. Zeus feud (which would eventually be available on the original Supertape, which I’ve seen roughly 183 times). Hogan rips off Beefcake’s shirt but won’t let Beefcake do the same. That’s why he has no friends. Sherri, apparently a Beefcake fan, sends the cage door into Hogan’s face to drop him outside, leaving Beefcake two on one.

Since it’s Hogan, that lasts all of thirty seconds before Hogan punches Savage through the bars and climbs over the top to clean house. Zeus gets sent into the cage a few times to take over but he sends Hogan and Beefcake into the cage to drop both of them. Savage goes up but Beefcake breaks that up as well. The sleeper doesn’t last long on Zeus so the villains send Beefcake and Hogan into the cage a few times each. For some reason Savage and Zeus try to climb over the top, earning stereo suplexes back down.

All four are down so the referee tries to go inside (because he doesn’t understand the rules), allowing Sherri to ram him with the door as well. Sherri gives Savage the chain as he goes to the top of the cage but Beefcake manages to punch him out of the air. Savage and Beefcake fight on the side of the cage until Beefcake escapes and Hulk Hulks Up. With Beefcake dragging Savage out of the cage, Hogan sends Zeus into it a few more times. A slam sets up THREE LEGDROPS (GEEZ) for the pin at 9:44. Jesse: “I don’t believe it, he did it again!”.

Rating: C+. Watching this back, it is the definition of a post show dark match to send the fans home happy as other than Savage jumping off the cage, there really wasn’t anything special to this. Hogan dropping that many legs made it feel big, but the match itself is just pretty good. The nostalgia is strong enough though and Hogan was over like free beer in a frat house, so it’s the definition of good, easy fun.

WWF Title: Bob Backlund vs. Pat Patterson
Date: September 24, 1979
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentator: Vince McMahon

Backlund, with Arnold Skaaland, is defending and Patterson’s Intercontinental title isn’t on the line. Vince says that this is the fourth time the two have fought at MSG, apparently the first time a match has happened that many times at the Garden. Backlund starts fast and sends Patterson into the cage a few times as the fans are rather pleased. It’s rather too early for either to escape so Backlund cages him again.

Patterson cuts him off for a change and rams him a few times, only to get caught at the door. With that not working, Patterson tries to climb out so Backlund goes up as well. They slug it out on top until Backlund barely makes a save for a double crash back to the mat. In a change of pace, Patterson goes for the door but gets caught, then goes over the top but gets caught.

What appears to be a foreign object busts Backlund open and Patterson hammers at the cut. Backlund gets up for a hard shot of his own and they’re both down again. Patterson pulls him down so Backlund hits a catapult into the cage to bust him open as well. The atomic drop hits Patterson but he catches Backlund on top. The swing with the foreign object misses but they crash back down anyway. Backlund kicks him away and backs out of the door to retain at 16:41.

Rating: C+. This one took some getting into and it was only so good. They did a lot of the same things over and over and it didn’t exactly work. Backlund was trying here and Patterson was usually good but something was holding them back. Maybe they needed to mix it up a bit but this didn’t get beyond pretty good.

WWWF World Title: Bruno Sammartino vs. George Steele
Date: July 25, 1970
Location: Philadelphia Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Sammartino is defending and this is the earliest match in the set. There is no commentary here and we see the cage put up by a guy in an undershirt for a weird visual. The ring announcer even tells us what the two of them will be wearing in a smart touch. Bruno starts fast and unloads with those kicks in the corner that he made look very good. The choking is on in the corner as it’s all Bruno to start.

Steele cuts him off from an early exit so Bruno unloads with some ax handles to the chest. A ram into the cage cuts Bruno off for once and the stomping ensues. Bruno manages to kick his way up from the mat (that’s awesome) to take over again and Steele is sent into the steel. Steele is allowed to go up but Bruno pulls him right back down for another crash.

A low blow gets Bruno out of trouble but he’s right back up and hammers Steele in the head. Bruno gets in those big stomps to the head and then chokes away until Steele goes to the eyes. Raking of the face has Bruno gyrating a bit and the fans are all over Steele. The blind Bruno swings away so Steele sends him into the corner for more stomping. Finally Bruno has had enough and just erupts, firing Steele into the cage over and over and stomping away. With Steele properly destroyed, Bruno walks out to retain at 14:34.

Rating: B. I’ve seen this match a few times before and it’s just fun. The crowd carries it a lot as they are absolutely rabid for Bruno and that comeback at the end had them looking like they were ready to kill Steele. It’s a very different era and they aren’t doing anything more than basic stuff, but my goodness the reactions and energy from Bruno are both great.

Jesse Ventura vs. Tony Atlas
Date: May 22, 1982
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 11,513
Commentators: Dick Graham, Kal Rudman

As usual, Jesse is great at being a heel, as he walks around the ring and yells at various people, like a villain should. Jesse takes his sweet time getting in and immediately tries to escape, only to be pulled back down to start the beating. Right hands and elbows have Ventura down fast but he blocks some rams into the cage. A headbutt puts him down instead but Ventura is back up with a failed ram of his own.

Ventura cheap shots him and sends Atlas into the cage to bust him open. A bite to the arm and an atomic drop keep Atlas in trouble as commentary is a bit stunned. For some reason it takes Ventura way too long to figure out how to get out of the cage, meaning the beating can be on again. Some rams into the cage bust Ventura open and then does it again to make it worse. Ventura hits him low for a breather but again takes way too long to go out. This time it takes so long that Atlas gets up, hops over the cage and escapes to win at 10:36.

Rating: C+. They were having a good fight until the kind of weird ending, as Atlas just suddenly remembered he had maxed out leaping ability and won. Ventura getting outsmarted, or at least outjumped, was kind of a weird way to go, but at least they had a unique way out. Not a great match, but it was getting good there at times.

Bruno Sammartino/Paul Orndorff vs. Roddy Piper/Bob Orton Jr.
Date: October 26, 1985
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Dick Graham, Gorilla Monsoon

Before the match, Sammartino says he isn’t climbing over the top, but rather walking out the door after he has destroyed Piper and Orton. Yes Sammartino is a little older but he is ready to take these two out.

One more thing: before the match, we hear about next month’s card. This will include:

David Sammartino
Corporal Kirchner
Hercules Hernandez
Hart Foundation vs. Uncle Elmer/Hillbilly Jim
Big John Studd vs. Hillbilly Jim (listed as a correction)
Don Muraco/Mr. Fuji vs. Tito Santana/Ricky Steamboat
King Kong Bundy vs. Andre The Giant

Freaking WOOF man, and the show itself would be even worse.

Anyway, all four are in at once here but in a twist, only one has to escape. It’s a brawl to start and Bruno is busted rather quickly. Orndorff slugs back to take over, including taking Orton’s cast and using it to smash Piper in the head. Piper is busted open and panics as he tries to escape, only to be pulled back inside.

Bruno is back up as well and starts unloading on Piper (as only Bruno can) but a cheap shot takes him down. Everyone is busted and we hit stereo chinlocks (that’s a new one in a cage match) but the good guys are up rather quickly. Orndorff and Orton go up and over at the same time, with Orndorff hitting the ground first for the win at 7:33.

Rating: B-. As has been the case, this was getting somewhere and then it ended before it could turn into something really good. What matters here is that Bruno got to look like a killer again as the awesome Piper vs. Orndorff feud continues. I could go for either combination of this again and that is because there was some awesome talent in there. Good stuff here, but it could have been better.

Post match Orton gets right back in and Bruno is left laying. Because THAT’S a good idea.

Intercontinental Title: Magnificent Muraco vs. Jimmy Snuka
Date: October 17, 1983
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Pat Patterson

You might have heard of this one and Muraco is defending. Before the match, a serious Muraco talks about the experience you need in a cage match and how he is still champion because he is the best.

Snuka’s manager Buddy Rogers talks about how Snuka will win because he is the best.

Snuka promises violence in the cage, as only he can bring.

We get the entrances from the backstage, including the famous fan sign “When Snuka Flies, Muraco Dies.” Snuka checks the cage and looks up, with a certain Hardcore Legend Mick Foley clearly seen in the crowd after hitch hiking because he had to see this match in person. Snuka goes right after him to start and chops against the ropes but a catapult sends him into the cage.

Another shot puts Muraco back down and Snuka goes up, but Muraco knows what that means and cuts him off quick. A slam off the top brings Snuka back down, followed by a low blow to keep him down. Back up and Snuka’s chops bust Muraco open to make it even worst. The middle rope forearm to the head sets up a flying headbutt….and Muraco goes sprawling through the door to retain at 6:46.

Rating: C+. Oddly enough, for one of the most famous moments ever in wrestling, the match is pretty much nothing. Muraco was terrified of letting Snuka get up top and then absolutely lucked his way into retaining. Snuka was so obsessed with violence and revenge that he kind of screwed himself over, but you could feel the intensity here, which is one of the places where Snuka often shined.

Snuka isn’t having that and pulls Muraco back in for a suplex. Then he climbs the cage and, in one of the most famous shots in WWF history, dives off with the splash to END Muraco (who sells it perfectly and doesn’t move an inch). Snuka drops the belt on him and poses before leaving.

Post match, Muraco’s manager Lou Albano says that Muraco is hurt but not destroyed. Muraco survived the most dangerous move in wrestling history and Albano goes on a rant about how Muraco fell out of the door COMPLETELY on purpose because he’s that smart.

Overall Rating: B-. The overall rating doesn’t mean much here as it’s just a random assortment of matches but there really isn’t a great one on here. A lot of these are rather short but what matters is how much the energy is cranked up. This was about beating the fire out of each other and it did show just how intense things can get when the cage is involved. Good enough stuff here, and I’ve got more than enough of these for a few extra volumes, which sounds rather appealing.

 

 

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WWF Wrestling Challenge – September 27, 1986: You Might Know Them

Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 27, 1986
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re back with more of what WWE has released of the show and that means we could be in for something fun. The wrestling isn’t exactly high quality on here but it’s one of those shows that is so easy to watch and it makes for some entertaining stuff. There isn’t anything big on the schedule for the time being but Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff is still going very strong. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Gorilla and Bobby (who doesn’t speak) welcome us to the show.

Opening sequence.

Commentary runs down everyone on the show this week.

Koko B. Ware vs. The Gladiator

Ware gets an insert promo before the match, introducing us to his new parrot Frankie. Gladiator’s headlock doesn’t last long and he misses a shoulder to make it worse. Back in and we get a criss cross until Koko stops to do the Bird. A hiptoss puts puts Gladiator down and it’s time to work on the wristlock. Ware wins a slugout, with Heenan not liking all of the punching. Gladiator walks into a neckbreaker and the Ghostbuster (brainbuster) finishes him off at 2:52. This was not the best from Ware and things looked quite sloppy at times.

It’s time for Wrestler’s Rebuttal, featuring Slick, Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik talking about how they can’t stand people around here.

Paul Orndorff vs. Lucius Brown

Orndorff comes out to Real American (there’s an angle that needs to be brought back) and has Bobby Heenan with him. As usual, the fans drive Orndorff crazy with the PAULA chants Brown starts fast but a leapfrog is countered into a hot shot. Orndorff sends him outside for a crash, followed by a clothesline back inside. The piledriver finishes Brown at 2:03. That landing must have messed with him pretty badly, as about a year later he would come back calling himself Virgil and working for Ted DiBiase.

Ricky Steamboat talks about getting pushed too far by Jake Roberts and wanting revenge. Steamboat came here to push himself and win a championship, which he might do down the line, but then he ran into someone like Roberts who wanted to do the same. Now Roberts did it with a DDT on the concrete floor, but next time it’s going to be Roberts going down.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Terry Gibbs

This is Honky Tonk’s in-ring debut and as he hammers away, we get an insert promo from Hulk Hogan talking about how great Honky Tonk Man really is. Gibbs gets in an elbow to the chest but Honky Tonk slams him off the top. There’s the backdrop and Honky Tonk’s straps come down, setting up another slam (he likes those). The top rope fist drop finishes Gibbs at 2:35.

Lanny Poffo mocks his own new haircut and talks about how many fans are buying the signed Frisbees. For now though, he has a poem about something important in the Special Olympics. It’s about how important it is for kids to be able to get back in the game and my goodness that was actually rather nice.

Butch Reed vs. Mike Kelly

Reed, with Slick, is billed as Mr. Natural (later THE Natural) in what might as well be his debut (he had wrestled the day before on Superstars). In another insert promo, Reed talks about how he’ll soon be the natural champion. Reed shoves Kelly around to start and knees him in the ribs to make it worse. A forearm to the face lets Reed pose a bit before pulling him up off a suplex. Reed finishes him with a gutbuster at 2:42. Thankfully Kelly’s gut wasn’t busted too badly, as he would go on to become Shane Douglas.

We go to the Snake Pit with special guests the Hart Foundation. Jimmy Hart says they are bad seeds before Jim Neidhart talks about how the snake eats a rat or a chicken. But could it perhaps eat a Killer Bee? The Harts think it might be hungry for a Rougeau or a Bulldog, with Jake talking about how you have to be hungry for what you want. They are the men that your mother always warned you about, the nasty boys. They said quite a bit here but what matters is they didn’t overstay their welcome like so many talk shows today.

We go to the Isle of Samoa, where the Wizard shouts about how Sika’s ancestors did various evil things year a thousand years ago. Sika comes up eating a fish and the Wizard wants a return to the days of cannibalism. So Sika is a fish? Oh and Sika is going to eat Hulk Hogan. So Sika is Hulk Hogan? And a fish? Then they go into the jungle, where Sika eats some plants. So Sika is….I give up. Then they go to a fire as Wizard keeps talking about how evil Sika can be and Sika eats something else. This went on for a long time and they got the point across with the first of the three segments.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff vs. British Bulldogs

Non-title and Slick/Freddie Blassie are here with Sheik and Volkoff. After the Russian national anthem, we’re ready to go with Sheik driving Bulldog up against the ropes. It’s off to Volkoff to choke Dynamite in the air (with one hand for some rather impressive power) and then send him into Sheik’s raised boot. Dynamite suplexes his way to freedom though and it’s Bulldog coming back in for the suplexes. Bulldog tries another suplex but Slick sweeps the leg so Sheik lands on top for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C. That’s quite a weird thing to see on one of these shows and it certainly came out of nowhere. The cheating protects the champs and likely sets up a series of house show title matches, but dang that is weird to see for 1986. At the same time, it’s kind of amazing how long Sheik and Volkoff were a team. They were together at Wrestlemania I and still together two years later at Wrestlemania III, which is a good while longer than I had realized.

Slick talks about buying half of Freddie Blassie’s contracts so he could be the first black manager. There are no wrestlers more talented than Iron Sheik, Nikolai Volkoff and Hercules Hernandez (not here). Volkoff talks about how much better things are now that Slick is here and Sheik calls Slick, and I quote, “a rare honest black man.”

The preview for next week and a highlight package take us out.

Overall Rating: C-. I know the wrestling isn’t very good and it doesn’t feel like anything of note happens around here, but sweet goodness it’s fun to get away from everything moving at a breakneck pace on modern shows. This is quick, to the point stuff and helps get the wrestlers over to make them seem more important. It’s such a fun show and I could go for a lot more of it, which will certainly be the case.

 

 

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WWF Boston House Show – June 27, 1986: The Trash Should Explain It

WWF House Show
Date: June 27, 1986
Location: Boston Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 14,348
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund

Welcome to “I feel like watching some 80s wrestling”, as we have a house show from almost three months after Wrestlemania II. This is a bit of a strange time for the WWF, as Hulk Hogan is ruling the world and there are good feuds beneath him, but he is going to need a big challenger to come after the title. That might be taken care of tonight. Let’s get to it.

Gorilla and Gene welcome us to the show and run down the top of the card.

Based on cards I can find, this show is not in the same order that it aired, but I can’t imagine it makes that much of a difference.

Les Thornton/Tiger Chung Lee vs. US Express

Unfortunately this is the Dan Spivey version of the Express. Thornton and Rotundo start things off and Thornton drops him with a running shoulder. Rotundo pulls him down into a headscissors as Gene talks about a recent golf outing. With that broken up, it’s off to Spivey to headlock Lee over. Spivey grinds away a bit but Lee gets in a shot of his own, allowing Thornton to come back in. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Spivey powers up, only to get caught in a front facelock.

Commentary talks about some of the great teams at the moment, including Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff and George Steele/Junkyard Dog. I question commentary’s definition of “great” as Spivey gets taken down again. Lee comes in for a slam, only to get slammed off the top for his efforts. Rotundo comes in to finally pick up the pace, including a legdrop between Lee’s legs.

We lose the camera feed for a bit before coming back to Lee driving Rotundo into the corner so things can slow right back down. Thornton grabs a chinlock until Rotunda fights up, only to have Lee offer a distraction so the tag doesn’t count. Rotundo finally kicks him away and brings in Spivey for the house cleaning. A backdrop into a jumping elbow gets two but Lee gets dropkicked out to the floor. Back in and it’s Rotundo getting caught in the corner AGAIN as this match just won’t end. This beating doesn’t last as long as it’s back to Spivey for the bulldog to finish Thornton at 12:17.

Rating: D. Oh sweet goodness this was boring and I have no idea why it went on this long. It’s a match where you could cut the time in half and do the same thing that much better. The Spivey version of the Express didn’t work out very well and you could tell that the team was on the downside here. The action was slow and uninteresting and I was begging for it to end, making the last five minutes rather awful. Terrible choice for an opener.

Tony Atlas vs. Harley Race

Race has only been around here full time for about a month and a half now. They trade headlocks to start, with Atlas grinding him down to his knees. Back up and Race tries a headbutt but goes down to the power of racial stereotypes. We’re right back to the headlock but this time they fall outside, with Atlas being knocked over the barricade.

Atlas takes his sweet time coming back inside so Race suplexes him back in for two. Back up and Atlas grabs a suplex of his own, only to miss an elbow. Race puts him down with a swinging neckbreaker and drops some elbows. A dropkick gets Atlas out of trouble and a middle rope headbutt puts Race down again. The splash hits knees though and a sunset flip finishes for Race at 8:27.

Rating: C-. Well, it was better than the opener, at least partially because it was a bit shorter. Atlas came off as confused more than anything else, as he spent a lot of time standing around, allowing Race to either move or block it. Race is of course able to have a good match with just about anyone and he was holding it together until they finally just stopped.

King Tonga vs. Pete Doherty

Tonga is the future Haku/Meng and is currently owed $50,000 for slamming Big John Studd, which he does not seem likely to collect. Doherty is a local heel who was a bit of a mainstay around Boston and even did commentary on some of these shows. Tonga powers him around to start and Doherty is complaining about a non-existent hair pull.

Back up and Tonga kicks him away before glaring Doherty off for trying a ram into the buckle. Doherty has a breather on the floor before coming back inside to miss a charge in the corner. Tonga hammers away and hits a dropkick, followed by a superkick. A flying headbutt finishes Doherty at 4:20.

Rating: C. This was little more than a squash as Tonga ran over him and Doherty got in a grand total of nothing. That being said, that’s kind of the point of someone like Doherty, who was never going to be any kind of a threat to anyone. Tonga was at least a more interesting star and someone who moved around better than almost anyone else on the show so far, though that isn’t a high bar to clear.

Moondog Spot vs. Pedro Morales

They lock up as Gorilla talks about his matches with Bruno Sammartino here in the Garden. Morales starts fast with some backdrops and Spot needs a breather. We pause for Spot to yell at the fans before he grabs a not exactly cranked on headlock. Morales breaks that up without much effort and they stare at each other a bit more.

Spot gets in a shot of his own though and the chinlock goes on. Said chinlock is about as lazy as you can imagine but it stays on for a good while. Morales fights up and gets a sunset out of the corner for no count, allowing Spot to punch him in the face. Not that it matters as Morales small packages him for two, followed by an O’Connor roll for the pin on Spot at 7:27.

Rating: D. Is the WWF mad at Boston for some reason? There have been four matches so far and the best one has been ok at best. Morales is a legend and the fans are going to respond to him, but how interested can you get in a few punches and some rollups? Spot was even worse though, making this another lame match in a show long series of them so far.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Jake Roberts

Ok this HAS to be better. Steamboat chases him to the floor and the fight starts out there as they don’t quite like each other. They get back inside with Steamboat being sent inside but easily blocking a DDT attempt. With Roberts on the floor again, the referee almost hits Steamboat, with commentary NOT being happy with such an action.

Back in and Steamboat sends Roberts into the corner and is rather fired up. Roberts gets tied up in the ropes and hammered some more, only to break free and drop Steamboat with a hard right hand. A clothesline and a heck of a whip into the corner have Steamboat down and Roberts says hit him. Not one to be rude, Steamboat slugs away but gets punched down again as Roberts wants to box.

Steamboat is knocked through the ropes and barely hangs on from crashing out to the floor. Back in and Roberts grabs the sleeper, which he switches into a chinlock to avoid drowsiness. With Steamboat fighting up, Roberts slams him down and hammers away some more. The referee breaks that up as well and commentary still isn’t pleased.

It’s time for the snake but it takes too long, meaning Roberts has to try/miss a running knee lift. A neckbreaker drops Roberts again and Steamboat does it a second time for a bonus. Back up and Roberts hits the knee lift, sending Steamboat outside again. Roberts follows him out but gets posted and sent inside….as Steamboat is counted out at 13:28.

Rating: B. I’m not sure if it was the anger between the two of them or the fact that the show has been so dull until now but this was a rather good match. They were beating each other up and Roberts felt like he was tormenting Steamboat and trying to hurt him at the same time. On the other hand you have Steamboat getting ticked off and fighting back, which is something he does rather well in his own right. Rather strong stuff here, as most of their feud wound up being.

Post match Steamboat stays on him, even sending Roberts into the barricade to bust him open. Back in and the referee has to drag Steamboat off so Roberts can escape.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Hogan is defending and Savage’s (with Miss Elizabeth) Intercontinental Title (which he isn’t carrying) isn’t on the line. Savage jumps Hogan from behind and gets in a belt shot to the back to start rather fast. The top rope ax handle has Hogan in more trouble but Liz gets up on the apron for some reason, allowing Hogan to pop up and start throwing the right hands.

Hogan even takes Savage’s sunglasses and hammers away while wearing stolen property. Savage is sent outside and rammed shoulder first into the post to keep him in trouble. Back in and Hogan drops him again as the fans are rather pleased with these happenings. Liz runs to the back for some reason as Hogan chokes Savage in the air to make it worse.

Hogan hits a suplex and Savage’s arm gets tied in the ropes. That’s fine with Hogan, who bites away (what a monster), only to get sent outside. Savage comes off the top with an ax handle to the floor, allowing Hogan to adjust his trunks a bit. Back in and Savage hits the top rope elbow (to no reaction from commentary) for two, as it’s Hulk Up time. All of the usual sets up the legdrop to retain the title at 7:13.

Rating: C+. Stolen property and attempted cannibalism aside, this wasn’t exactly a classic but Hogan vs. Savage is always worth a look. The most telling part though was the non-reaction to the top rope elbow, as the Intercontinental Champion hitting his finisher had almost no chance of beating Hogan. That’s how big Hogan was at this point and it was rather telling for what was going to be the reality of this feud for, well, ever.

Post match Adrian Adonis comes in to beat on Hogan, who fights off both villains (Adonis’ bra is exposed). Hogan even takes Adonis’ wig as the parade of thefts continues. A lot of posing ensues.

Moondog Rex vs. Billy Jack Haynes

They take their time before locking up, with Haynes grabbing a headlock to take over. Rex powers up and gets in a cheap shot in the corner, only to have the referee block another one so Haynes can take over (commentary still isn’t pleased). Haynes grabs a chinlock with a knee in the back (a rare sight from the good guy), which is broken up with a quick belly to back. A backbreaker stays on the back as Haynes starts staggering around. Rex grabs his own chinlock before missing his own elbow, allowing Haynes to slug away. A dropkick….I think misses Rex (now busted open a bit), but Haynes slaps on the full nelson for the win at 6:08.

Rating: C-. It was better than the other Moondog match, but there were a few parts there where they didn’t quite seem to be on the same page. Haynes was a decent power guy with a good full nelson but there is only so much that he could do. At least it was short, which is rarely a high compliment for any match and it isn’t here either.

King Kong Bundy vs. Junkyard Dog

Bundy bails from the threat of a chain because, you know, it’s a chain. Gorilla says we’re in for a classic, suggesting that he doesn’t know the definition of the word “classic”. They hit the stall button for over a minute before Bundy drives him into the corner for a clean break (though the referee yells at Dog for a bit). Bundy knocks him down but misses the elbow, allowing Dog to fire off the elbows to the head.

After a quick trip tot he floor, Bundy comes back in so he can win a slugout. The splash misses but so does Dog’s headbutt as we’re getting some trash thrown inside. Bundy takes him into the corner for a short form splash, plus a chain shot to the ribs as more trash is coming in. More choking ensues as the referee takes some trash to the head.

Dog slugs back, reaches for the missing chain, and then punches some more. Dog finally grabs the chain and Bundy bails, leaving the referee to yell at Dog again. The chain is put back in the corner and they lock up again. Bundy pulls the chain in but gets headbutted, leaving Dog to toss the referee with the chain for the DQ at 7:39.

Rating: D. Not only was it a bad match, but the fans completely gave up on it about halfway through. Throw in a bad ending (along with the trash) and this was just horrible. I’m not sure what was going on here but it really didn’t work in the slightest. It’s so strange to see the fans rebel against a match like that, though it’s kind of hard to argue against in this case.

Post match Dog beats up the referee again, including a Thump (powerslam). Commentary REALLY is not pleased here as the oddness continues.

Magnificent Muraco vs. Paul Orndorff

Rematch of the Wrestlemania II opener. Fuji goes over to say something the microphones can’t quite pick up on commentary as the referee gets some of the trash from the previous match out of the ring. They fight over a lockup and break it up against the ropes as this feels like they’re taking their time. Muraco shoves him away as we’re already over two minutes in.

Some knees to the head and ribs have Orndorff in trouble and a Hennig neck snap of all things makes it worse. Orndorff knocks him to the floor for a breather though and Muraco is perfectly fine with hitting the stall button again. Back in and Orndorff starts working on the arm as we hear about his football career. The arm cranking goes on for a bit as they might as well have the clock counting down to the time limit draw on one of the advertisement boards.

More trash comes in (and is kicked out much faster this time) as Orndorff keeps the armbar going. The arm cranking reaches about three straight minutes so Gene talks about people he met on a recent flight. Muraco FINALLY fights up and sends him into the corner, setting up….a nerve hold.

Back up and Muraco sends him into the corner again, setting up another nerve hold as you can hear the fans getting REALLY fed up. One piece of trash can be seen sailing in and almost hitting the camera as this is deserving all of the anger it gets. Orndorff fights up and hammers away, accidentally showing some life in this mess. A top rope elbow to the head and an elbow drop have Muraco in trouble and the slugout is on. Orndorff grabs a small package for two as the 20 minute time limit expires at 15:11.

Rating: F. Orndorff showed some fire at the end but this was two guys going out there and more or less taking the main event off after an already horrible show. This was terrible and made me want to see their already bad Wrestlemania match again, as they weren’t trying and made no secret whatsoever about it. Just dreadful

The referee says Orndorff wins and commentary goes off about how little sense that makes, even calling it a “miscarriage of justice” to show you how serious they really are.

Overall Rating: D-. When the third best match of the night is a King Tonga squash, you know you’re in serious trouble. Roberts vs. Steamboat was rather good and Hogan vs. Savage was fun enough, but that is the grand total of anything you might want to see on a show that runs almost two hours. The fans throwing so much trash into the ring that the referee can’t get rid of it fast enough tells you everything you need to know here, as this was one of the worst house shows I’ve ever seen and most of the people involved should have felt embarrassed by what they did out there. They won’t, but they should.

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Monday Night Raw – January 23, 2023 (Raw XXX): They Know This Stuff

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 23, 2023
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Corey Graves, Kevin Patrick

It’s Raw XXX as the company celebrates thirty years on the air. As usual with the big Raw milestone episodes, we’ll be seeing a bunch of legends for special appearances. In addition, there are two title matches and a cage match so the card is stacked. If that isn’t enough, it’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here are Hulk Hogan and Jimmy Hart to get things going. Hogan talks about Raw debuting in 1993, pauses because the mic doesn’t work, praises the Philadelphia Eagles and is all done.

We look at some of the cities the show has taken place in over the years before switching into the big highlight package. The hit a lot of the big names, including a bunch of AEW names, debuts, title changes, reveals and almost anything else you could want. WWE has absolutely not forgotten how to montage.

Here is the Bloodline with their long form entrance for the Trial Of Sami Zayn. After having Philadelphia acknowledge him, Reigns hands the mic to Paul Heyman so we pause for an ECW chant. Heyman: “ECW is dead and I wish the same for Sami Zayn.” Heyman accuses Zayn of being in a conspiracy with Kevin Owens since day one (that was only last January).

Zayn has been trying to lure the Bloodline into a false sense of security, just like the Philadelphia Eagles. Heyman brings up BROCK….Purdy, the quarterback of the San Francisco 49ers, who will beat the Eagles next week. We see some clips of Sami not exactly helping in fights, capped off by Zayn BUMPING INTO REIGNS while going on a rant. Heyman says that should be enough for Zayn to be GUILTY AS CHARGED (nice).

Zayn gets his chance to talk and he wasn’t sure how he was going to feel when he came out here. He can’t believe that he is on trial here, but his defense is that he has no defense. Reigns is disgusted at the disrespect and tells Solo Sikoa to take care of him. The Samoan Spike is loaded up but Jey Uso cuts Sikoa off.

Jey has his own footage, showing a montage of Sami helping the Bloodline over the last few months, including taking out Kevin Owens in WarGames. Jey talks about how Sami saw the good in him the entire time and that’s what family does. Fans: “UCEY!” We get a fan poll of whether Sami should stay and the fans seem pretty unanimous.

Jimmy even agrees and Reigns gets to his feet. Reigns finds Zayn not guilty…..for now. In the meantime, Sami can finish out tonight by making the Bloodline proud. After that, Reigns doesn’t want to see or hear from Sami until the Royal Rumble, where Sami delivers his final test. There’s your drama for Owens vs. Reigns on Saturday as this story takes a pretty big step forward.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Judgment Day

The Usos are defending and have Sami Zayn in the corner to counter Finn Balor/Rhea Ripley. Jimmy and Dominik start things off but Jimmy has to kick Priest to the floor. Priest Pounces Jimmy over the announcers’ table and the champs are in trouble. Back in and Dominik chokes a bit, only to have Jimmy get over to Jey without much trouble. The running Umaga attack gets two on Dominik but Priest is back in with a superkick.

Priest hits the step up flip dive to take the Usos down again. Back in and the Usos fire off some superkicks to drop Priest and Dominik, but Balor offers a distraction. The referee catches Balor crotching Jey and gets ejected, leaving Priest to get superkicked down. Jimmy’s Superfly Splash gets…..two and everyone can breathe a bit. Jimmy takes Priest down on the floor and hold on as Jimmy has hurt his knee.

The referee throws up the X and Jimmy is taken out, with Adam Pearce saying if Jimmy is out, the match and titles are forfeited. Sami says not so fast, as Sami USO is ready to go, with Pearce saying let’s go. We get back to the match with Sami diving on Dominik and Priest on the floor. Dominik grabs a quick rollup with his feet on the ropes for two but Sami suplexes him into the corner. Ripley breaks up the Helluva Kick though and it’s South Of Heaven from Priest to give Dominik two.

The 619 is broken up by Jey’s superkick but Jey can’t bring himself to superkick Ripley. The distraction lets Dominik hit the 619 on Jey and the frog splash gets two as Sami makes a diving save of his own. Priest goes shoulder first into the post so Dominik dumps Sami, who is back in with a blind tag. The superkick into the 1D retains the titles at 14:06.

Rating: B+. I needed a breath after that one as those were some crazy hot near falls. They had me believing that Judgment Day could have taken the titles more than once and it was one close two count after another. This was one of the best Raw matches WWE in years and one of the better things WWE has done anywhere in a good while. Everything was laid out so well and the wrestlers executed it to near perfection.

In the back, Roman Reigns says he still doesn’t want to see Sami until the Royal Rumble.

JBL and Baron Corbin ask the Godfather to put him in the poker game. Godfather will have to ask the host. Said host happens to be Ron Simmons, who is happy with a payoff to get Corbin’s name on the list. They go into the APA’s office and it’s pretty much a full on casino with all kinds of wrestlers and wrestling personalities included.

Here is LA Knight who says he is all man and doesn’t want to wait for the Pitch Black match. He calls out any legend…..and the gong sounds. And then it’s the American Bad***, with song and motorcycle. Knight talks about how he’s going to have everyone chanting his name….and then the lights go out. Bray Wyatt, with lantern, pops up to back Knight into Undertaker, who grabs him by the throat. Bray gets inside and Undertaker tosses Knight over for Sister Abigail. Fans: “HOLY S***!” Undertaker goes to leave but stops to whisper something to Bray before riding off.

We go back to the poker game, where Madusa (with Women’s Title belt) seems to win but loses to Diamond Dallas Page.

Bayley vs. Becky Lynch

In a cage with pinfall, submission or escape. Hold on though as Becky has to beat up the rest of Damage Ctrl on the floor. All of Damage Ctrl gets inside to beat on Becky before the bell rings. Adam Pearce finally gets inside as Damage Ctrl sits on top of the cage. No match.

Here is D-Generation X, with Kurt Angle. Road Dogg does the catchphrase but asks why Angle is here. Kurt says he always wanted to be in the team and pulls off his own shirt to reveal a DX shirt. Hold on as Kurt will have to pass a test. HHH: “Are you ready?” Kurt: “Was that the test?” They load up the bigger catchphrase but Imperium of all people interrupts. Imperium doesn’t like these degenerates and a fight is teased. HHH: “I’m retired.” Shawn: “I’m too old.” Dogg: “Who am I kidding?”

We get a DX huddle and HHH volunteers Kurt to fight. Kurt: “No I won’t.” Dogg: “We’re in a pickle.” Cue Seth Rollins and then the Street Profits and we seem to have a six man. Dogg thinks we need to make it official and looks at HHH for an announcement. HHH: “Why does everybody look at me for something like this? This booking stuff isn’t easy!” We need someone body out there to make sense of this. Cue Teddy Long for the only possible payoff, but we also need a guest referee. Kurt just happens to have a referee shirt on too (red white and blue stripes of course) and we’re ready to go after some funny stuff.

Imperium vs. Seth Rollins/Street Profits

Kurt Angle is guest referee and Jerry Lawler is on commentary. Vinci’s headlock on Rollins doesn’t last long so it’s off to Ford, who gets clotheslined down. Kaiser comes in and strikes it out with Dawkins for a double knockdown. That means the tags to Gunther and Rollins with Gunther taking over and knocking Rollins out of the air.

We take a break and come back with Rollins fighting out of a chinlock and backflipping out of a belly to back suplex. The hot tag brings in Ford and the Profits grab stereo ankle locks. That’s too far for Gunther, who comes in and breaks them up. Gunther stares Angle down and pokes him in the chest, with Rollins coming in for the save. The Profits hit the flip dives to the floor, leaving Rollins to get dropkicked and powerbombed to give Gunther two. Rollins is back in with an Angle Slam and the Profits hit a Doomsday Blockbuster on Kaiser. A Pedigree sends Gunther outside and it’s a frog splash into the Stomp to finish Vinci at 13:03.

Rating: C+. It was a good six man, with the most important part being Gunther not taking the fall. They had me worried that Rollins would pin him to set something up between them (which might be the case anyway even without the pin) as it wasn’t the time for Gunther to get beaten. The Profits and Rollins winning works well and they had a good match on the way there, though DX and Angle were the stars of the whole deal.

Back to the poker game where Ted DiBiase loses a fortune….but IRS wants JBL and Baron Corbin to pay their taxes and takes the money back. Well save for $100. Ron Simmons, catchphrase.

Bobby Lashley promises to get the US Title back when MVP interrupts. MVP again offers the reunion but Lashley isn’t in.

Here is Ric Flair for a chat. He hits the catchphrases and introduces Charlotte for the big family moment. Charlotte thanks the other women for making her such a decorated champion but this will always be her show. Cue Bianca Belair to interrupt, saying she goes here now and this is her show. Cue Sonya Deville to ask about her recognition for working so hard. Charlotte owes Deville but offers Belair the chance to deal with Deville. Deal.

Sonya Deville vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title. Belair flips over her to start but Deville gets in a shot to the face. Back up and Belair is sent into the corner, where she backflips over Deville and hits a backbreaker. A running boot knocks Deville outside but Belair gets sent into the barricade as we take a break. We come back with Deville dropping her again for two but Belair pops up and hits the KOD for the pin at 8:33 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: D. That was a weird ending and it wouldn’t shock me if something was cut for time. In addition to that though, the match was quite the mess as it felt like a complete lack of chemistry. Deville feels in way over her head and it doesn’t help that she seems to be there as a filler challenger to Charlotte until we get to the important stuff. Not a good match whatsoever, but at least it didn’t take up too much time.

Post match Belair says that was just a preview for what she is going to do to Alexa Bliss. Cue Bliss on screen, talking into a mirror about how violent she can be with no one helping her.

Video on Cody Rhodes’ 2022 before he returns this weekend at the Royal Rumble.

John Cena is the cover star for WWE 2K23.

Here is Miz to ask where his special time on this show is. Cue Kevin Owens to Stun Miz and leave him laying, promising to take out Roman Reigns at the Rumble.

Royal Rumble rundown.

US Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Austin Theory

Lashley is challenging and this is No DQ. Lashley goes with the power to start and clotheslines him out to the floor. The posting rocks Theory and we take an early break. Back with Theory slipping out of the delayed suplex and catching Lashley with the rolling dropkick for a stagger.

Lashley is fine enough to send him to the apron for a running forearm and the table is sent inside. The Hurt Lock is broken up but Lashley sends him face first into a chair in the corner. Lashley loads up the table, only to get sprayed with a fire extinguisher. A whip into the steps keeps Lashley in trouble and we take a break.

Back with Lashley hitting a superplex, leaving both of them down. The spear through the table in the corner is broken up and Theory kicks him low. Lashley is fine enough to put Theory through another table….and Brock Lesnar is here. The F5 plants Lashley and another one to Theory puts him on top of Lashley to retain at 14:23.

Rating: C+. You almost have to expect that Lesnar is going to show up somewhere in there on these shows and going after Lashley again isn’t a surprise. Given that Lashley mentioned a rematch with Lesnar was coming soon, they were kind of telegraphing the whole thing. That should be a heck of a fight, though this one was only pretty good, with Theory retaining in the right result.

Overall Rating: B. This was kind of an all over the place show, but the biggest problem was the first hour, as nothing was touching that Bloodline segment and the Tag Team Title match. Other than that, you had a few random cameos from the legends and a bunch of classic stills, but the majority of the show was just an amped up Raw. I liked more than enough of it for the show to be a success, but it wasn’t quite as much of a nostalgia trip as I was expecting.

Results
Usos b. Judgment Day – 1D to Dominik
Seth Rollins/Street Profits b. Imperium – Frog splash to Vinci
Bianca Belair b. Sonya Deville – KOD
Austin Theory b. Bobby Lashley – F5

 

 

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Wrestling Spotlight – August 14, 1988: Referee Talk

Wrestling Spotlight
Date: August 14, 1988
Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon, Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura,
Hosts: Vince McMahon, Lord Alfred Hayes

This is one of the low level WWF shows from back in the Golden Era and upon seeing an episode of it pop up on YouTube, I figured it was worth a look. This is my favorite era of the company’s history and we would be coming up on the first Summerslam around this time. Odds are this is going to be promo based so let’s get to it.

Dang I love that WHAT THE WORLD IS WATCHING voiceover.

Opening sequence.

Vince and Alfred hype up the Summerslam main event and talk about who we might be seeing here.

From Cedar Rapids, Iowa, July 14, 1988.

Rick Rude vs. Billy Brown

Bobby Heenan is here with Rude and before the match, Rude shows off his Cheryl Roberts tights. Brown actually tries to fire up the crowd as we get a voiceover from Howard Finkel for an upcoming show, which sounds like a fundraiser. The beatdown is on as we get an inset promo from Rude saying that Jake Roberts should get some WWF binoculars (because there are WWF binoculars) to see just how ravishing he REALLY is. Oh and Cheryl has never looked so good either. The Rude Awakening finishes at 1:15.

Post match Heenan brings in a woman (who is NOT like Cheryl Roberts) to get the kiss from Rude.

And now, the Brother Love Show. Love is SO excited this week because his personal benefactor, Ted DiBiase, is his guest. Instead though, here are Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth to interrupt, with Savage saying they have some very different definitions of love. Savage LOVES being the WWF Champion but he also loves his partner at Summerslam, so here is Hulk Hogan (in a weird looking red shirt/yellow trunks combination).

Love goes to leave but Hogan says hang on, because he has a different definition of love too. Hogan loves being the Hulkster and the Hulkamaniacs, but for now he would LOVE to get his hands on Love. That’s enough to send Love running off and the Mega Powers LOVE the idea of beating up the Mega Bucks at Summerslam. They lift up Liz and pose, with Hogan’s music playing because he’s still the real star.

From LaCrosse, Wisconsin, July 13, 1988.

Tito Santana vs. Tim Dixon

Jesse Ventura doesn’t buy that Tito is a singles star again because there is no way Rick Martel is STILL injured, but rather he’s just scared of Demolition. Santana works on an armbar to start before running Dixon over with a shoulder. Another armbar sends Dixon over to the ropes as Jesse insists that he will NOT be intimidated by Andre the Giant at Summerslam (which was a great story to the match as even Jesse was intimidated by Andre because, you know, it’s Andre).

Santana grabs the armbar again so Dixon makes it to the rope for the break. The armbar goes on yet again and Vince gets bored listening to Jesse talking about not being worried over Andre and acknowledges how boring this is. Tito FINALLY finishes with the flying forearm at 4:01.

Rating: D. Tito is one of my all time favorites but my goodness this was boring. They went four minutes and most of that was spent on various armbars. This is a match that could have had probably three minutes cut off for the same result. The match was there as a way for Jesse to talk about not being intimidated by Andre and that got old almost immediately.

We go to the Event Center with Sean Mooney to run down a card at the Capital Center in Landover, Maryland (remember that this would be the show for the local market so this part would be different depending on where you were). Therefore, let’s hear from some people on the card.

The Fabulous Rougeau Brothers are sure they’ll beat the Hart Foundation because they’re really brothers.

Ultimate Warrior is ready for Honky Tonk Man, who won’t be a challenge.

Video on Honky Tonk Man.

From Cedar Rapids, Iowa, July 14, 1988.

Greg Valentine vs. Ken Patera

Joined in progress with Valentine begging off and getting punched in the corner. Valentine kicks him down though and hits a headbutt between the legs to take over. The Figure Four (with the Heartbreaker shin guard, which was a big deal for Valentine around this time) is loaded up but Patera kicks him away. A clothesline gives Patera two as commentary mocks the cover and Patera’s skills in general. I mean fair enough but you could be a bit nicer. Patera misses a charge in the corner so Valentine loads up the Heartbreaker, only to have Don Muraco come in and jump Valentine for the DQ at 2:58.

Post match Muraco goes after the Heartbreaker but has to deal with Jimmy Hart, allowing Valentine to escape. Muraco holds up Patera’s arm, even as Valentine is announced as the winner. Patera was AWFUL at this point and it was showing badly here.

The Mega Powers know how big Summerslam is going to be because…..kids have been asking for their allowance before doing their chores? Anyway, there are plans of elbows, bearhugs, slams and the Kiss Of Death. You can figure out who is going to do what.

Here’s how you can order Summerslam!

From Cedar Rapids, Iowa, July 14, 1988.

Rockers vs. Dave Wagner/Tom Burton

Jannetty hiptosses Wagner down into an armbar to start before a drop toehold sets up Michaels’ legdrop to the back of the head. A belly to belly drops Wagner again as Heenan is teasing his own team. Brown comes in as Monsoon doesn’t seem to know which Rocker is which. Michaels drops a running elbow, setting up the top rope fist (off of Jannetty’s shoulders….so I guess it’s a top shoulders) fist drop for the pin at 2:59. Total and complete squash.

Vince and Alfred talk about Jesse Ventura being the guest referee for the Summerslam main event, which has been a major topic for this show.

UPDATE with Gene Okerlund looks at Summerslam, or at least the main event. This show is starting to look like a one match card. We do at least get some more matches discussed, which has barely been done all show.

From LaCrosse, Wisconsin, July 13, 1988.

Terry Taylor vs. Chris Todd

Taylor armdrags him down a few times as Jesse compliments Todd’s tights. We get an inset interview from Taylor, where he brags about being so handsome and thanks his parents for making him into Scary Terry Taylor. Vince: “Thanking his mom and dad? For what?” Anyway Terry keeps hammering away and we talk about Jesse being guest referee AGAIN. Some stomping and an awful looking spinebuster (Taylor dropped him) sets up the Scorpion Deathlock to finish Todd at 2:24. This was BAD and Taylor would actually get worse as the Red Rooster.

From Cedar Rapids, Iowa, July 14, 1988.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Warren Bianchi

Bianchi is rather short and….I guess we’ll say ugly. We get an inset interview from Honky Tonk Man and Jimmy Hart, who aren’t happy with Beefcake being on the cover of the new WWF Magazine instead of Honky Tonk. Beefcake unloads on Bianchi with the usual array of right hands and stomping before finishing with the sleeper at 2:01. Total squash and Gorilla says this is a win on Wrestling Challenge, as this was from a taping of another show (and probably aired on there too).

Post match, Bianchi gets an unwelcome haircut.

King Haku is ready for Tito Santana at the Capitol Center, with Bobby Heenan demonstrating proper bowing procedure.

Randy Savage is ready for the taller and heavier Andre the Giant, also at the Capitol Center.

We get the rest of the Landover card and….yeah I think I’m good.

Vince and Alfred wrap us up and give us one more Summerslam push to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It’s pure nostalgia and I’m not even going to pretend it’s anything else. This show was all about Summerslam (mainly the main event/Jesse’s referring) and that got a bit old fast. Other than that, this is basically the poor man’s version of Superstars or Prime Time and that didn’t exactly make for a fun 45ish minutes. That being said, it’s late 80s WWF and I’m always in for that, so odds are I’ll be back on this period sooner rather than later.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2006 (2021 Redo): This Is A Party?

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re finally here and just like all the other times I’ve seen this show, it still doesn’t feel all that big. Nothing on the card really stands out above the rest as some major match, but instead we are getting a bunch of important matches at once. That isn’t a bad thing, but it did make for kind of an odd setup. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the history of the show….and then the DX logo pops up as we talk about DX vs. the McMahons, followed by everything else.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

They’re fighting over Eddie Guerrero’s memory, so we look at both videos from Smackdown, focusing on both of their relationships with them. So yes, it does come off as a pay per view match based on people arguing over who was Eddie’s real best friend. This is also Chavo’s return from retirement, despite the fact that he was on almost every TV show since retiring. Rey hammers away to start fast as JBL goes on a rant about the Guerrero family as only he can.

Chavo tries a shoulder breaker but gets sent outside, where he manages to avoid Rey’s dive. Chavo’s dive connects and it’s time to choke away back in to the corner. Rey comes back out of another corner and kicks away at the leg, only to be sent head first into the buckle. The fans chant for Eddie as Rey is knocked outside but comes back up top, right next to Chavo. They both hit a big facebuster back to the mat and it’s a bit of a breather. Rey is back up with a kick to the head and there’s the 619.

Chavo counters the seated senton though, meaning Rey has to hurricanrana him over the top for a double crash to the floor. Cue Vickie Guerrero to yell at Chavo and slap him in the face. Rey takes him down with a dive and they head back inside to exchange Three Amigos each. It’s Rey going up top but Vickie crotches him down, allowing Chavo to hit a brainbuster. The frog splash finishes Rey off.

Rating: C+. The match was good, as you would expect from these two, but egads the battle of these two over Eddie’s memory was hard to watch. I know it’s the logical way to go, but at the same time it feels like it’s being designed to set up some big Eddie return, which doesn’t seem that likely. I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of these two together and hopefully that does not include hearing Eddie’s name every fourth word.

Queen Sharmell and King Booker are ready to face Batista but here are Edge and Lita to interrupt. They argue over who is the most powerful couple, with Booker calling him a squire. The champs make a bet: if Edge loses his title, he has to kiss Booker’s feet but if Booker loses his title, Booker he has to be Edge’s servant. I’m still not sure if these champion vs. champion scenes matter quite as much as WWE thinks they do.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Big Show is defending under ECW Rules. Sabu chairs him down to start and hits a quick Arabian facebuster for two. Show isn’t having that and knocks both Sabu and the chair down. The bearhug goes on for a few seconds, followed by a fall away slam to send Sabu flying. Sabu finds another chair though and knocks Show silly, followed by a top rope chair shot to do it again. It’s table time, but first Sabu hits a top rope bulldog. Sabu drives him through the table in the corner but Show is right back up to run him over.

A Vader Bomb connects, with Sabu rolling outside as Show grabs the steps. Two sets of steps are thrown in and a table is bridged between them. Sabu uses the breather to climb onto the table, which falls down, then reset it and DDT show through it for….well nothing as he doesn’t bother to cover. Instead, Sabu sets up another table and is quickly chokeslammed through it to retain Show’s title.

Rating: C. They did what they had to do well enough here, as they didn’t stay out there too long and had Sabu use all of his weapons to cover up all of the issues. I’m not sure how much of a doubt there was about who was leaving as champion, but now I’m curious to see who is next for Sabu. This could have been much worse so I’ll call that a win.

We look at Layla winning the Diva Search.

Layla comes into the locker room where some of the women brag about her cover on a magazine. Trish Stratus goes on a rant about what everyone else had to do to get here. But it’s ok because Layla is one of them now. Then they take her into the shower and soak her for her initiation. I know the idea of a bunch of Divas in the shower is a simple concept, but it loses its steam when they are in their usual clothes.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton. Legend meets Legend Killer, who was also hitting on the Legend’s daughter.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

They lock up to start with Hogan shoving him down to hit the posing. Orton has some more luck with a headlock, but he gets shoved away again without much effort. Hogan powers out of another headlock and shoves Orton down again but this time Orton gets in a cheap shot and stomps away. You don’t try to ram him into the buckle though as Hogan blocks the shot and hammers away in the corner, as only he can. A thumb to the eye and more right hands set up a clothesline to keep Orton in trouble.

There are the back rakes as JR talks about Hogan’s heeling days in the AWA. Orton bails to the floor where he grabs Hogan’s knee and rams it into the apron. Back in and the circle stomp keeps Hogan in trouble but he ducks the high crossbody. The big boot misses though and Orton nails the dropkick. The RKO connects for three but Hogan’s foot is on the rope just in time. There’s the Hulk Up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes Orton.

Rating: D+. I’m always going to be a Hulkamaniac but what in the world was this? Hogan comes in, shrugs off almost everything Orton has, and wins in about eleven minutes? It’s a feel good moment and such but this serves Hogan and Hogan only, which makes me think he probably had a lot to do with the decision. Orton could have used this win and while it won’t destroy him, the loss doesn’t exactly feel like the smartest move. The match wasn’t even that good, as Hogan dominated for the first half, got beaten down for a bit and then went to the finish with some pretty limited drama.

Posing ensues post match.

Melina gives Mick Foley a pep talk but Mick is worried about the kind of mood Flair is in. She also doesn’t want Foley to lose and damage her reputation as the manager of champions. Foley is fired up too though and seems ready to go.

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

I Quit match so Foley brings in a trashcan full of weapons. Foley starts fast and hits the running knee in the corner. The Mandible Claw goes on about a minute in but Foley lets go to ask Flair if he quits. Since Flair can’t speak at the moment, Foley puts barbed wire around Mr. Socko, allowing Flair to grab him low. Flair puts on the barbed wire Socko and chops him out to the floor.

There’s the big whip into the steps but Foley grabs a barbed wire board to hack Flair up as well. The fans sound like they want fire as Foley chokes with a boot. There’s another barbed wire board shot to the face and then one to Flair’s back but he still won’t quit. Flair is COVERED in blood and Foley pouring out the thumbtacks isn’t going to make it better. Foley slams him onto the tacks but Flair still won’t quit, so let’s bring in a barbed wire baseball bat.

Thankfully Flair gets in a low blow and sends Foley shoulder first into the post. Flair hits Foley’s arm with the bat but Foley won’t quit, even with threats of Flair killing him. A big shot knocks Foley off the apron and into the Nestea Plunge, onto a trashcan for a cushion. The trainer comes out to say Foley can’t continue but Flair isn’t having that. Instead he throws Foley back inside, sending him right through the thumbtacks.

Flair goes for the eyes with the barbed wire bat as Melina is out here begging for mercy. The bat is driven into Foley’s face so Melina throws in the towel to quit for him. Flair kicks Foley low and demands that Foley be the one to quit. With nothing else working, Flair grabs the bat and goes for Melina, which is enough for Foley to quit.

Rating: B-. This one is likely going to have a lot of different opinions, but the biggest problem is that I didn’t exactly enjoy the match. Above all else, it was too violent (and yes I know that was the point) for and there was so much blood between two people who probably shouldn’t be doing this to themselves anymore. Then there is the Melina thing which is a real life friendship, but it came out of almost nowhere on WWE TV. I get why Foley quit to save her, though it isn’t like some big epic moment or friendship between the two. They did what they were supposed to do, but it wasn’t something I could really enjoy.

Foley is COVERED in blood and can barely stand.

The McMahons are warming up with Armando Alejandro Estrada in their office. Estrada promises that Umaga will be there to hold them against DX.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T. vs. Batista

Booker is defending. They take turns shoving each other into the corner to start until Booker slaps him in the face. That earns him a big push down so Booker chops away. It doesn’t exactly work though as Booker grabs a Stunner over the to rope and nails a hot shot to keep Batista down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit, with Batista fighting up for a belly to belly. They head outside, where Sharmell slips Booker the scepter to hit Batista in the face. Booker takes him back inside to crank on the arm and then switches back to the chinlock. The fans talk about a certain disease they claim Sharmell has as Batista fights up to crotch Booker on the top.

It’s back to the floor with Batista being distracted by Sharmell and sent into the steps. The Book End gives Booker two but the ax kick misses, setting up a Jackhammer for two on the champ. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but Sharmell comes in for the DQ. You can’t even say it was a long match for that lame of an ending.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure if you can call this a clash of styles but they didn’t have much of a flow to the match and the ending was even worse. This will set up a rematch on the next pay per view but I’m not sure I want to see it again. The match wasn’t the worst but it isn’t the kind of match I want to see again. If nothing else, you would think the World Title match would get more than eleven minutes but it doesn’t even hit that, leaving this feeling like a match that they had because it was required instead of something they wanted to feature.

Post match Batista wrecks Booker again to set up the rematch.

DX is talking to someone in the men’s locker room. They seem to have backup.

We recap D-Generation X vs. the McMahon, DX has tormented Vince and Shane for months now so now the McMahons (and their band of mercenaries, meaning Umaga and the Spirit Squad) are dealing with this here.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

DX does their usual intro and we’re ready to go. Actually hold on as the McMahons stay on the stage and send out the Spirit Squad. DX dispatches them in a hurry so here are Mr. Kennedy, Finlay and William Regal, who are beaten up after just a bit more time. Now it’s Big Show to take Shawn out while the other three beat up HHH on the floor. HHH gets put through the announcers’ table and NOW the McMahons are willing to head to the ring.

Vince slams Shawn down as we officially start, setting up Shane with the jabs. The bosses take turns beating Shawn down, though Shane is smart enough to hit the floor and stomp HHH down. A double suplex sets up a Paisan elbow and Shane takes HHH down again. There’s a Demolition Decapitator (JR: “They think they’re Demolition.”) into a Hart Attack into a Doomsday Device for two on Shawn, with Shane being stunned.

Shawn fights up and hits a double clothesline, allowing the hot tag to HHH. House is cleaned in a hurry and Shawn beats Shane up on the floor. Cue Umaga though and Shawn gets taken out, leaving the McMahons to beat on HHH. With Umaga ready to wreck DX even more, cue Kane to fight him to the back. HHH is down in the corner as Shane loads up Coast To Coast but Shawn is back up to superkick it out of the air. Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree finishes Vince.

Rating: ;C-. It was another nicely done story with the execution lacking. As has been the case for the entire feud so far, DX never felt like they were in trouble. Having the army there helped a good bit and DX was at least down here, but we are reaching kind of a goofy point where you can only throw so many people before it stops mattering. An army of midcarders is a big update over the Spirit Squad though so it’s a step forward, but the match, again, wasn’t much to see.

A lot of celebrating ensues, with a trainer checking on Shawn.

We recap John Cena vs. Edge for Edge’s Raw World Title. Edge cashed in Money in the Bank to win the title at New Year’s Revolution but then Cena took it back at the Royal Rumble a few weeks later Then Rob Van Dam took the title and Edge got it back, with Cena giving chase. Edge slapped Cena’s father on Raw, so you know it’s personal.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Edge, with Lita, is defending and loses the title if he is disqualified. Cena wastes no time in shoving Edge hard into the corner to begin the destruction. The referee has to cut things off and Cena misses a charge into the post. That means Edge can hammer away and send Cena outside for a nine count. A spinwheel kick gives Edge two but Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets the same. Cena gets tossed over the top and out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena misses a crossbody and we hit the chinlock. Cena eventually powers out so Edge boots him in the face for two. Edge heads up top and gets crotched, though he is fine enough to shove Cena down and score with a top rope clothesline for two. The camel clutch goes on until Cena fights up with a slam for the double knockdown. It’s Cena back up with the Throwback and it’s time to pick up the pace.

Lita throws in a chair because she forgot the rules but Cena gets rid of it just as fast. Cena fires off his clotheslines but Edge cuts him off for two. Cena’s victory roll gets two so Lita gets on the apron, only to get knocked down again. A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown until Edge is up with the Edge-O-Matic for two.

The spear is loaded up but Cena counters into the STFU. Edge grabs the rope, allowing Lita to slip him some brass knuckles. Cena doesn’t mind and loads up the FU, which draws Lita in. Again, that’s fine with Cena who puts them on his shoulders at the same time. Lita gets flipped down but Edge slips out and uses the knuckles to the back of the head to pin Cena and retain.

Rating: B. It’s the best match of the show, but that isn’t exactly clearing a high bar. They were starting to feel things at the end before the screwy finish but at least Edge got a pin instead of having Lita come in for the DQ. Cena was starting to have the Superman vibe here as he was fired up and unstoppable, which makes the ending seem a little more impressive. They did well here, though the mic work is still the high point of the feud.

Edge and Lita celebrate as Cena wakes up to stare down down and end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure if it’s the lack of one match standing above the rest or the lack of anything really changing but I still don’t care for this show all that much. It also doesn’t help that nothing really jumps off the page as far as quality, leaving this to be a not exactly memorable show. This felt like they were gearing up for their next brand exclusive shows. That is a way to go, but then why should I want to watch this? The show does feel big, but nothing happens here and that leaves you with no real reason to watch it, which isn’t exactly what you expect from a show usually this important.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2005 (2020 Redo):

Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

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