Bound For Glory 2012
Date: October 14, 2012
Location: Grand Canyon University Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the biggest show of the year for TNA and honestly I’m not all that excited about it. The main event tonight is Aries vs. Hardy for the title, but the REAL main event is Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray. The question is much more about who is going to be the leader of the gang, or if that’s even going to be revealed. I’d look for a fun quality show tonight but nothing that jumps off the page. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what you would expect: it talks about the history of the company and how big the show is. Most of this has been shown on Impact in the Memories Are Waiting promos.

There’s a ramp to get to the ring which is always cool.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

Ion is defending. Rob came out on Impact when Ion was running his mouth and Van Dam said Hogan said he could have any match he wanted at this show. Zema has been injuring a lot of people lately. Rob takes over to start and knocks Ion to the floor but Ion moves before Rob can dive. Back in and Ion takes out Rob’s leg followed by a corkscrew kick out of the corner for two.

The champ goes up again and gets crotched, followed by a kick to take him down again. Out of nowhere Ion hits a jumping tornado DDT for two and then two more. Rob goes up but gets shoved into the barricade like he’s had done to him a few dozen times over the years. Ion hits a flip dive to keep Van Dam down while also barely avoiding breaking a rib on the barricade.

Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Ion. As usual with Ion, his in ring stuff isn’t bad but the promos and persona getting there don’t do him much good. Off to an abdominal stretch which is pretty quickly broken. Van Dam makes a very fast comeback, takes Ion down, hits Rolling Thunder and the Five Star and wins the title at 8:00.

Rating: C. I can’t complain about Van Dam winning the title at all as this gives the title some credibility that it hasn’t had in a new champion in awhile. Also this gives the fans something to pop for early on which is the right idea. The match itself was nothing you wouldn’t see on Impact, but the right ending helps.

Magnuis says it’s his time to shine and therefore take the title.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Magnus

They used to be partners and then split. Feeling out process to start with Joe taking him into the corner for the enziguri to take over. The champ pounds away and Magnus has to hide for mercy. Magnus comes back with punches of his own as we have a strike heavy match so far. A big old clothesline takes Joe down and Magnus takes over for the first time so far. Magnus takes him down with a knee and stomps away, followed by a jumping elbow for two. This is pretty decent stuff so far.

Joe fires back with some right hands but charges into something like a Michinoku Driver (sitout slam) for two. Magnus runs into an atomic drop and Joe starts speeding things up, firing up the fans in the process. They’re in Phoenix so you wouldn’t think that would be too hard. The backsplash and snap powerslam get two for Joe. Joe gets all crafty now and counters a leapfrog into a powerbomb to kill Magnus.

In a sequence that is always cool, Joe hooks an STF but once Magnus is getting too close to the ropes, he shifts it into Rings of Saturn. After Magnus gets a foot on the ropes, Joe loads up the MuscleBuster but Magnus goes to the eyes. A kick to the face takes Joe down and Magnus hits a top rope elbow for two and Joe is all fired up. He throws on the choke but Magnus escapes by climbing the corner. A jawbreaker escapes the hold again and Magnus goes for the knee. You don’t try holds on Joe though, and the choke retains the title for Joe at 8:57.

Rating: C+. They’re going with the fast matches tonight and that’s probably a good idea with these less interesting matches. This was a better match than the first one but when you have two talented guys in there instead of one, you’re often going to have a better match. There was no reason for Joe to lose the title yet anyway so no complaints there.

Roode says it ends tonight with Storm.

Video on Roode vs. Storm. Last year Roode lost in the main event of BFG, then Storm won the world title the next week on Impact. Roode used a beer bottle to beat Storm for the title and turn heel, which led to Storm wanting both revenge and the title back. Roode lucked out at Lockdown and then cost Storm the BFG Series, leading to a street fight tonight.

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

MMA fighter King Mo is guest outside referee for no apparent reason. Storm takes over to start and hits a fast backdrop. We head to the floor with Storm in control. He hits Roode in the back with a chair but Roode sends him into the barricade to counter. Storm leg sweeps him into the barricade as well and Roode is in trouble early. Bobby comes back and sends Storm into the post, busting him open. Well at least they’re not waiting on bringing the violence here.

We get the weapons thrown into the ring and the fans want tables, because what would a street fight be without tables? Oh man Storm’s cut is a gusher. Roode puts a chair between the top and middle ropes, allowing James to come back with some kendo stick shots to the ribs. Storm hits a trashcan into Bobby’s balls using a kendo stick like a golf club to make Roode vibrate on the mat.

They head to the ramp with Storm hitting a DDT on the I guess wood. Storm jabs Roode in the ribs with a fan’s crutch and DESTROYS him with a trashcan. Mo hasn’t been a factor yet. Roode snaps off a spinebuster onto the ramp out of nowhere to give himself a breather. Storm grabs a fan’s beer for a quick refreshment. They head to the announce table and Roode kind of spears Storm through the other table to take over. There is blood EVERYWHERE. That gets two back in the ring and Roode yells at Hebner, which gets him in trouble with Mo.

The distraction lets Storm hit the Codebreaker and Last Call….for two. I’m glad that was only two as it would have been a pretty weak ending. Another superkick is caught and Storm is sent face first into the chair Roode set up in the corner a long time ago. That gets two so Roode puts Storm on the top rope. He gets a chair for a hard shot to the head and busts out the bag of thumbtacks. See, now that it’s been awhile since we’ve done this, it means something again. Roode tries a superplex onto the tacks but gets shoved down into them in a painful looking spot.

Storm drops a top rope elbow for two but Roode hits him low to stop Storm’s comeback. Roode goes to the floor and gets a beer bottle which is what started this whole thing. Storm hits Bobby low, takes a drink of the beer, and cracks the bottle over Roode’s head. Storm stands him up, and with Roode out on his feet, a second Last Call sends Roode into the tacks for the pin at 17:27. King Mo was barely a factor here and didn’t need to be around at all.

Rating: B+. In short, the cage match was better. That’s all this boils down to: the match at Lockdown was one of the best built up matches I can remember in a long time but they extended the feud because that’s what seemed like the right idea. Now don’t get me wrong: this was a great brawl and a good bloodbath and it had the perfect ending to the feud, but the feud didn’t need to be here, or at least not with Storm losing the second match. This is like Rock beating Austin at Wrestlemania 19 with nothing on the line. It’s a very good match, but it doesn’t mean as much.

Joey Ryan talks about says he should be on the roster already. He and Snow are polar opposites and tonight, they’re on the west coast where he has the advantage. He’s bringing sleazy back tonight.

We recap Ryan vs. Snow. Ryan was on Gut Check and got a big percentage of the votes, but the judges said no. Ryan terrorized Gut Check, becoming the only interesting thing about the segment for months, and tonight he faces Snow for a contract.

Al Snow vs. Joey Ryan

Ryan hides in the corner to start and the fans want Head. Snow is in workout clothes instead of wrestling gear. Snow gets down on all fours and lets Ryan get in a free chance to start. That goes about as well as you would expect for Ryan and he hides in the corner again. This is a good choice for putting on after the big street fight that just happened. It’s a way for the fans to calm down a bit.

Ryan keeps trying basic offense and Snow stops him at every turn. A delayed slam puts Joey down and Snow takes him to the mat with a headlock. Ryan gets in a shot to the ribs and a suplex for two. Snow comes back with the trapping headbutts and grabs Joey’s chest hair. Snow takes him down again for two and the fans want Head. And that’s what they get from under the ring. Ryan shoves the referee down and steals the Head for a makeout scene. Snow ties Joey up in the ring skirt….and here’s Matt Morgaon to Carbon Footprint Snow into next week. Ryan gets the easy pin at 8:28.

Rating: D+. This was about what you would expect from Al Snow in 2012. The Morgan twist was fine and a pairing between him and Ryan could be interesting, as if nothing else Ryan could use a bodyguard. This was the ending they had to go with and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially with faces being undefeated in the first hour.

Ryan and Morgan shake hands.

Kaz and Daniels don’t care about Twitter questions and brag about how awesome they are. These two feel totally greasy and evil and they’re GREAT at it.

We recap the tag title match. Basically both challenging teams should be able to maul the champions but they can’t quite get there. AJ and Angle keep arguing and Hernandez and Chavo don’t have the experience yet.

Tag Titles: Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

Angle and AJ come out separately. Wes Brisco is in the front row and I’d bet we’ll see him later. Daniels and Kaz are in orange and black to start jokes from Taz. Chavo and AJ start things off and in a strange visual, Angle and Hernandez are standing on the same side of the apron. Daniels and Kaz are chilling on the floor. This starts with the usual technical goodness you would expect from these two.

Off to Angle who stomps Chavo down in the corner and Chavo has some tape on his shoulder. Angle slams Chavo down on said shoulder and Daniels blind tags Kurt to come in and….scratch that as Angle stays in. Off to AJ vs. Hernandez with the big guy throwing AJ around and getting two off a splash. Kaz tags himself in to stomp on AJ but there’s the drop down/kick and it’s back to Kurt.

Chavo comes in to face Kaz and some good basic wrestling takes Kazarian down. Hernandez drops Kaz with a backbreaker and it’s back to Chavo to dropkick the freshly tagged in Daniels. AJ comes back in because we can’t have a PPV without Daniels vs. AJ right? A clothesline puts AJ down and it’s time for some pelvic thrusting. The champs hit a double team move with Daniels hiptossing Kaz into AJ for two.

Kaz puts on a full nelson of all things on Styles but a quick Pele takes Kaz right back down. There’s the hot tag to Kurt who beats up everyone in sight. He snaps off some suplexes and counters a sunset flip into an ankle lock on Daniels. There go the straps but Angle misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Angle shrugs that off and suplexes Kaz onto Daniels for two.

Kaz comes back in with the slingshot DDT on Angle but Hernandez comes back in and takes out Kaz. Daniels smacks AJ in the face and there’s no one in the ring. Daniels dives onto Angle from the apron and there’s the REAL big dive from Hernandez to take everyone out. Kaz tries a rana off the top to Hernandez off the apron but Hernandez goes the wrong way and Kaz basically crashes on his shoulder in a SICK looking landing.

AJ gets the attention off Kazarian by hitting a BIG dive on the champs and Hernandez. Kaz is at least sitting up now. Chavo suplexes Angle over the top and back in as he rolls some suplexes. Angle Slam out of nowhere puts Chavo down and a double suplex takes SuperMex down as well. Kaz is back in with a clothesline to take Daniels down and the BME gets a VERY close two on AJ.

Chavo sends Kaz to the floor and hits another big dive to take him out. Angel’s Wings are broken up by Styles and the moonsault into the reverse DDT takes Daniels down. Hernandez actually tags in and hits a slingshot shoulder block followed by the Border Toss. Chavo hits a Frog Splash to give Hernandez (the legal man) the pin on Daniels and the titles.

Rating: B. This was a good match from these six as you would expect, but it didn’t really get close to the other matches that the teams have had before. That has to be expected though and this was certainly entertaining. All the dives were great, but man alive someone is going to get hurt badly from one of them one day. Daniels and Kaz losing makes sense as they’ve done almost all they can with the belts at this point.

Chavo says that was for the fans and for Eddie.

We recap Tessmacher vs. Tara. Tara is the teacher, Tessmacher is the student, Tara snapped, you fill in the rest. Oh and Tara has some Hollywood boyfriend who is likely some reality TV schmuck.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tess is defending. Tessmacher’s robe/jacket is on the ropes as we start. A quick crucifix gets no count for the champ. Teryn Terrell is referee again because…because…I have no idea why she’s still around actually. Tara gets sent to the floor and we get a chase scene. Tara hides behind the referee and we head right back to the floor where Tess gets dropped on the apron to give Tara the advantage.

Back in and the champ gets one on a sunset flip and it’s off to a chinlock by Tara. Tara whips her into the corner but charges into a boot followed by a DDT from Tessmacher to put both girls down. Tessmacher takes Tara down and nips right back up, followed by a top rope rana (decent one too) but Tara blocks the Tesshocker. Widow’s Peak and Tara gets the completely clean pin at 6:18.

Rating: D. The rana looked good and the girls looked good in their outfits, but thank goodness Tara won here. Tessmacher is just worthless as champion and hasn’t changed a bit since she won the belt the first time. Tara has had the belt before but at least she’s better than Tess, but most people would be.

Tara introduces the boyfriend: Jesse Godderz from Big Brother. To the shock of no one, there is zero reaction. He’s been training in OVW for like a year and has won five tag titles there. Tara and Jesse make out in the ring. Crowd: “WHO ARE YOU?”

We get a video from the Hall of Fame ceremony last night. Lex Luger inducted him, which is way better than Christian. Hogan dressed up in a t-shirt while everyone else was in suits. Sting talked about owning a gym in California and having Hulk Hogan working out there.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Ray is No DQ.

We recap said tag match. Aces and 8’s is a motorcycle gang who has been terrorizing TNA for about four months now and tonight, there’s a match between Sting/Ray vs. two members of the team. If the masked men win, they get full access to the Impact Zone. If they lose, the whole group leaves forever. The whole mystery here is about who their leader is, but in theory we’re going to find out tonight. Anderson was going to be the partner of Sting but Aces and 8’s beat him up, resulting in Ray getting the spot instead.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray

Sting and Ray both have facepaint. Aces and 8’s have theme music now. They bring out Joseph Park who looks a bit near death. There are two members here, one in a plaid t-shirt and another in a black one. We’ll call plaid shirt #1 and black shirt #2. This is No DQ and a brawl starts on the floor. Sting fights #1 and Ray has some issues with #2. #2 seems to be the taller of the two.

Sting gets sent into the announce table as the fans chant for Bully. Sting and Ray double team #1 and the fans want tables. The Stinger Splash hits the barricade as it has all but one time that I can ever remember. #2 and Sting start in the ring with Sting in trouble. Off to #1 who hits a clothesline for two. Park is chained to the barricade at ringside. #2 hits another clothesline for another two on Sting.

A bit boot gets another two and Ray is starting to play cheerleader. Sting makes a fast comeback and tries the Scorpion but #1 breaks it up. A suplex is countered by Sting into the Death Drop but Sting doesn’t cover for some reason. Double tag brings in #2 and Ray with Ray cleaning house. A middle rope shoulder takes #2 down and the fans are way behind Ray. Ray double clotheslines them down and a splash gets two on #1.

#1 brings in a chair but Ray hits a big boot to stop the shot. A third Aces and 8’s guy, pretty clearly Wes Brisco, comes in and hits Ray low. Park gets spat on and breaks the chain off the barricade. He comes in and destroys the third guy before beating him up the ramp. The match breaks down and #2 gets caught in a Doomsday Device. Double splashes crush #2 in the corner again and it’s Table Time with Sting playing Bubba’s role. Ray gets the table but #1 pulls Sting to the floor. Another member of Aces and 8’s comes in and spinebusts Ray through the table to give #2 the pin at 10:51.

Rating: C. Not much of a match here but the point is that Aces and 8’s won. How this makes anything any different is beyond me but this story hasn’t made much sense in the entire time it’s been running. Hopefully we’ll get some more to this tonight because if this is it, then it’s going to feel flat. The match was pretty much fine.

The rest of the group comes in and beats down Sting/Ray until Hogan comes in for the save and marches through them all until only the guy that jumped Ray is left. Hogan cleans house and Sting is back up. They go for the mask….and it’s D-Von. Yes, D-VON. Fans: “This is awkward!”

Aries says Hardy needs to win this to complete his comeback. Tonight, Aries is coming in angry and that’s not good for Jeff.

We recap the world title match. Aries is jealous of Hardy, Hardy wants the title to complete his redemption.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries

The fans are pretty much split which isn’t what they were hoping for I don’t think. We start with a long feeling out process and we have roughly half an hour for this. They head to the mat and Hardy actually keeps up with the champ (Aries is defending if I didn’t mention that) until they head to the corner for the slingshot dropkick. Aries comes back and puts Hardy on the apron for a slingshot ax handle. He takes a victory lap and then one in reverse.

Back in and Hardy gets two off a suplex. They’re still in first gear here and that’s fine. Jeff knocks Aries to the floor and mocks Aries. The fans don’t seem pleased with Jeff so he jumps off the apron with an ax handle of his own. Jeff charges at Aries but Hardy crashes into the barricade and hits Aries at the same time. Back in and Aries gets two off a top rope splash. Aries charges into a boot in the corner and the crowd is probably 80% pro Aries.

A backbreaker gets two for the champ and it’s off to an abdominal stretch on the mat. Aries takes him down again and hits a corkscrew plancha for two. Hardy blocks the Last Chancery and hits something Big Show used to call the Alley Oop. He sets for a powerbomb but throws Aries backwards instead of forwards. Show’s was a bit slower but it’s the same move. Hardy makes his comeback and hits the low dropkick for two.

Whisper in the Wind gets two and the fans have quieted down a bit. Twist of Fate is countered and Aries is knocked to the floor. Hardy misses a slingshot and there’s the suicide dive to drive Jeff into the barricade. Another dive takes Hardy out again with this one getting two in the ring. Aries is busted but nowhere near what Storm was earlier. There’s the Last Chancery but Jeff escapes quickly.

They head to the ramp and Jeff can’t hit the Twist, but rather gets clotheslined into the ropes. Aries drops him on his head, sending the back of Jeff’s head into the edge of the ramp. And people wonder why he’s a drug addict. A missile dropkick sends Jeff into the corner but he comes out with the Twist for two. Jeff loads up the Swanton but gets crotched and super ranaed down from a double standing position. That looked awesome. Corner dropkick sets up the Brainbuster for two and Aries is STUNNED. Aries puts Jeff on top but gets knocked off and the Swanton gives Jeff the title at 23:04.

Rating: B+. This was a good main event but after the Aces and 8’s stuff, this came off a bit flat. Also, TNA REALLY needs to mix up their main event styles. The kicking out of finishers and then the pin soon thereafter can only take you so far and they’ve done it for years now. Watch a few TNA PPV main events and the formulas are almost always the same. Hardy winning is the right choice but it doesn’t feel like a huge moment at all for the most part. Still though, a quite good match.

Hardy celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Was this a great show? No. Was it their best show of the year? No. Was it good enough to be their biggest show of the year? Not really. What it was however was a quite enjoyable show, other than the big surprise which my jaw is still having issues closing over. The ending was the right call as Hardy had to win the title to send the fans home happy. There are a lot of ways they can go now, but unfortunately Impact is going to be ALL about D-Von and that pretty much freaking sucks.

I can’t get over that and if they thought the angle was going nowhere already, they’re in for a big surprise now. I don’t think he’s the leader, but man alive this is BOUND FOR GLORY, not Impact. It’s a good show overall though and it sets up a bunch of stuff for the future, but man alive I don’t know who went with D-Von as the surprise. Even as a regular member, which is what he likely is, who thought that was a good idea for BFG?

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Magnus – Koquina Clutch

James Storm b. Bobby Roode – Last Call

Joey Ryan b. Al Snow – Pin after a Carbon Footprint from Matt Morgan

Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr. b. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle and Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Hernandez pinned Daniels after a Frog Splash from Guerrero

Tara b. Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak

Aces and 8’s b. Sting/Bully Ray – Ray was pinned after a spinebuster through a table

Jeff Hardy b. Austin Aries – Swanton Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Somehow there are only six matches for this thing so either each match is getting twenty minutes or some stuff is being added in.  Let’s get to it.We’ll start with the main event which was made No DQ via Twitter after Impact, because saying it’s No DQ ON THE FREAKING TV SHOW would have been a waste of time.  I’ll go with what should be obvious and have AJ get the title here, but I have a bad feeling we’ll see some screwjob that sees AJ lose when he’s supposed to win.  Yes it would be stupid, but that’s how TNA rolls anymore.

Jeff Hardy to win the X Title.  Hardy doesn’t lose at BFG.
Bobby Roode better beat Angle, or the lesson apparently is work hard to help the company and you get to lose to a guy who can’t stop drinking at work and gets arrested once a year or so.  This feud is going to continue though.

I’ll go with Hernandez and Chavo to win the title shot because these two are the charmed team in TNA for whatever ridiculous reason TNA has.  I have no idea what they see in the pairing because they bore everyone to death.  They’ll win the gauntlet but lose the title match.

Magnus over Sting with him turning heel because if there’s one thing TNA is lacking, it’s a 58th heel in the upper midcard.

Gail wins the Knockouts Title because she has to have it once every few months or the Knockouts Gods will destroy the earth.

Overall, Bound For Glory feels like a very flat show.  There’s nothing on here that sounds like a big match and the entire thing feels like a launching pad into the TNA vs. Dixie story.  I’m convinced Hogan appears at the end to screw over Dixie after she screws over AJ and get the title on Styles, because that’s what the promotion clearly needs: more HOGAN.  I’m not looking forward to this show and it feels like it’s the biggest show of the year because TNA calls it the biggest show of the year.  I was WAY more excited for Slammiversary with its lame main event.  The wrestling should be good but the build has been awful.

Thoughts/predictions?

Bound For Glory 2011
Date: October 16, 2011
Location: Liacouras Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the major show of the year for TNA and I can’t say I’m as excited about it as I was for last year’s. It should be good though as we have two major main events. Now that’s part of the problem: one of them is Sting vs. Hogan. They couldn’t have a good match 14 years ago so what are you expecting from them here? Other than that the rest of the show looks pretty solid. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about exactly what you would expect: a highlight package with everything leading up to the double main event.

The dark match was the tag title match with Mexican America retaining. Well at least the title didn’t change hands on a dark match. To be fair it was streamed free on the website so anyone could see it.

X-Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Austin Aries

I’m not sure if I’d have gone with a rematch for Kendrick so soon after Aries too the title from him. They have the garage door style lifting wall for the guys to come through. The fans are way behind Aries here. The crowd looks good here. They fight over a wristlock to start as we get a good feel for the crowd here with the loud Austin Aries chant. Tazz talks about how this crowd isn’t like most and that’s an understatement.

Things speed up a bit as they hit the mat. Aries goes to the floor so Kendrick is like PORKCHOP and dives onto him in a huge spot. Back in Kendrick gets caught in an STO and Aries loads up the Pendulum Elbow which blows the roof off the place. Kendrick counters and hammers away but the fans are all over Brian since this is the ultimate smark town. This could become a problem tonight.

They try what looks to be a rollup but Kendrick falls to the floor. Aries hits a HUGE suicide dive to fire the crowd up even more if that’s possible. Back in Aries tries the brainbuster but Kendrick knees his way out of it. They go up on the ropes but Aries talks to the crowd too much and gets caught in a top rope Sliced Bread for two as Aries grabs the ropes. They head to the apron and Kendrick tries it out there again but gets dropped onto the apron and then the floor. That and the brainbuster in the ring gives Aries the clean pin at 10:27.

Rating: B-. Can’t complain much here band this was what I was expecting for the opener. You can’t ask for much more than a cruiserweight match to start things off, but I’m hoping the show stays hot throughout the rest of the match. The right idea is to have things like this for later on in the show when you need to fire the crowd back up, but in Philly I don’t think it’ll be a problem. Keep that in mind: all rules about crowds are thrown out the window tonight.

The Knockouts are with some kids in the back and Karen comes in and she’s not happy. Oh ok they’re Kurt’s kids. The kids leave and Karen freaks out as always. Karen is refereeing the Knockouts match tonight. That means Madison wins tonight. Traci has to stay in the ring unless Karen is in danger.

We recap RVD vs. Lynn which is over Jerry being jealous or something. It’s Full Metal Mayhem which means TLC with pins. Can’t argue with putting this match on in Philly.

Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

Technical stuff to start but they’ve probably got a lot of time. There are only 8 minutes on this card and I can’t imagine that Hogan vs. Sting will break ten minutes. Rob takes over early and tries Rolling Thunder but Lynn pops up with a kick to the face. Tornado DDT is countered but the suplex is as well. The psychology here is solid and we hit a stalemate. They try a cross body over the top and that doesn’t work right, drawing half boos/half silence from the crowd.

We’re on the floor now and Van Dam tries a moonsault off the apron but misses and might have hurt his knee. Lynn brings in a ladder but Rob sends him in and gets a chair. He takes too long though and Jerry hits a baseball slide to send it into the face of Van Dam. Van Dam gets a spinning cross body onto Lynn onto the chair for two. The surfboard dropkick with the chair in the corner gets no cover. Rob does however get a ladder so the crowd is pleased.

The fans chant ECW and the ladder is splashed with Lynn under it for two. The fans never stay silent for long in this city. It’s something I wish you could hear in more cities too. Rob does a springboard moonsault over Lynn which appeared to be intentional. No idea what the point of that was other than to have Lynn hit him with the chair to take over. Lynn misses a senton backsplash onto the ladder and Van Dam takes over again.

Van Daminator misses so Lynn pelts the chair at him. Lynn gets a German for tow and Lynn is down more from it than Rob is. Lynn gets suplexed onto a ladder which is a lot more effective, so I guess American > Germany. Lionsault onto the ladder gets two for Rob. Rob tries one of his rolling moves but Jerry jumps off the middle rope and they collide at the same time. Lynn goes to the floor to get another ladder and I have the same question as Tazz: how many ladders do you need?

The second ladder is put up against the railing and Lynn tries a sunset bomb, resulting in Rob’s head slamming into the railing. FREAKING OW MAN!!! Lynn has a big bump under his eye. Van Daminator gets two. Rob sets up the Van Terminator with a ladder over Lynn’s face and it’s enough for the pin at 13:16. So Lynn can get up from a Van Daminator after two seconds but he can’t move after about 30 seconds of sitting in the corner?

Rating: B. Good match but it’s going to be overrated because it’s Lynn vs. Van Dam. This was more about the weapons and the violence than the whole psychology which was the standard of their old matches. The fans were of course into it because these guys used to be huge in ECW like 10 years ago. It was entertaining though and that’s the point of these matches.

They hug afterwards, meaning I guess it’s cool to cost Van Dam a title shot. I guess he doesn’t seem to mind or whatever.

We recap the triple threat which is all about getting the world title shot or something. It’s the first I’ve heard of that but they’re talking about it which is the right idea. Joe went crazy and hurt Crimson once Joe was mathematically eliminated from the BFG Series so Morgan went after him for being a bully. Hence the triple threat.

Samoa Joe vs. Matt Morgan vs. Crimson

New music for Crimson. I’m not digging it. Joe tries to get both guys to fight each other but they beat him up instead. Joe is wearing red and blue tights while the others are both in white. Morgan’s continue to be way too small for him. Crimson hits the floor against his wishes and Joe takes down Morgan with ease. Crimson tries to steal a pin off a Morgan side slam but just gets one.

The non-Samoans are sent to the floor so Joe tries a huge suicide elbow. Morgan steps to the side so Crimson takes all of it. As Crimson gets up and brawls with Joe, Morgan goes up and dives onto Crimson from the top. Not a good few seconds for the red one there. Back in Crimson suplexes Joe and Morgan tries to steal the pin. We’re into the triple threat formula here and that’s all fine and good.

The non-Samoans slug it out and Morgan takes him down, only for Joe to trip him up and pull him to the floor. Crimson’s leg injury is fine by the way, despite him having it on Impact. Joe loads up the MuscleBuster on Crimson but Morgan comes in to break it up. I’ve never gotten that. Why wouldn’t he let Joe take Crimson out? Anyway Crimson sends Morgan to the floor and Crimson hits the spear on Joe for the pin at 7:15.

Rating: C. Not much here and this was something you could have seen on any Impact. To be fair though, there was no real heat on this match as it was all about pride or whatever. I mean, we have to have the TV Champion fighting Scott Baio in his underwear so we can’t have the TV out there. It’s TNA though so titles mean less and less all the time other than the world title. This was probably going to be the weakest match on the card and it was certainly watchable.

Ray says he needs no introduction and talks about himself anyway. He buries Philadelphia, talking about how he’s never liked it here and he’s used the idiot fans for years to get where he is. This was really needed because Ray would have been the crowd favorite otherwise.

Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson

Anderson charges the ring and we start fast. Remember that this is a falls count anywhere match. Anderson tries to control early but Ray kicks his head off and puts Anderson down. Is there a reason why Anderson wears his shirt in his matches anymore? Ray chops him haRD in the corner (not good enough for all caps but decent) as Anderson’s hair is uh….weird. Anderson goes to the floor and takes a sign which has to be loaded. Yep there’s a metal sign in there and Ray goes down in a heap. Dead end sign and it goes over Ray’s head again.

They fight on the floor and a fan throws a beer on Ray. Anderson gets two on the floor and they go up the ramp. Anderson is infinately more entertaining when you let him stop wrestling. Ray reverses a suplex on the stage for two. Ray grabs the mic and talks about New York but Anderson beats him down and says this is Philadelphia. They head into the back and Ray hits a piledriver onto the concrete for two. Anderson gets choked with a red chair.

Back into the arena and they’re near the Spanish announce area. That has to be a copyrighted brawling area. Anderson takes part of the railing away and slides it into the ring but Ray beats him down and sets up a table. There’s another set up on the floor as well. Ray gets backdropped onto the railing and it’s bent.

Anderson goes up and misses the swanton onto the railing, allowing Ray to hit the Bubba Bomb (why is it not the Bully Bomb?) for two. I thought that was the ending. Anderson gets in a trashcan shot and loads Ray up onto the table on the floor. He goes up and channels his inner Jeff Hardy. There’s the huge Swanton BUT THE TABLE DIDN’T BREAK! FREAKING OW MAN!!! A Mic Check onto the table finally ends this at 14:28.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that was fun to watch. It wasn’t technically good or anything but if you’re expecting it to be you’re totally missing the point. This was a fun weapons match, although I kind of question having two of them on the same show like they did with Lynn and Van Dam. Decent match here and rather entertaining.

Bischoff is talking to a referee and says it’s a big night. It’s implied that the referee is in Immortal’s pocket. Eric says Hogan has to win and Sting has to be taken out for good. It’s revealed that Jackson James, the referee, is the son of Bischoff. This is treated as a shock by the announcers.

Knockouts Title: Winter vs. Velvet Sky vs. Mickie James vs. Madison Rayne

Karen is referee and Winter is champion. The crowd is WAY into Velvet. Winter is in a coat of some kind and Angelina is in a pink corset. Karen looks good in her referee stuff and Madison gives her the tiara. They have to tag here and it’s Winter vs. Mickie to start. Winter controls early but Mickie snaps off the slick rana in the corner and a neckbreaker puts Winter on the floor.

Madison comes in sans tag and tries to slap Mickie or throw something in her face but it doesn’t work. They’re playing up the Karen factor a lot here as the fix is in or something like that. Mickie goes to the floor and Velvet comes in. I guess it’s lucha tag rules. Velvet hits a bulldog but Karen ties her shoes instead of counting. Velvet and Mickie have to fight but shake hands first.

Both get rollups but Karen won’t count for either of them. The fans are all over this in a hurry. They slug it out for a bit with no real purpose because Karen isn’t going to count. Winter and Madison pull them to the floor and that’s a tag in a way I guess. Madison is in there finally and make that all four are in now. The good girls take over and the fans aren’t going to stick with this much longer.

Mickie vs. Winter at the moment but Mickie won’t cover because there’s no point to it. She beats Winter down but argues with Karen, allowing Angelina to give Winter blood. It gets loaded up but Mickie ducks, sending the blood into Karen’s eyes. I typed that before it happened. There’s the jumping DDT and here’s Traci. Things totally break down and Velvet hits the double underhook X Factor to win the title at 8:45.

Rating: D+. They wanted Velvet winning to be a huge moment and it just wasn’t. There was so much going on here and most of it wasn’t anything we haven’t seen before so this wasn’t much to see. Winter’s second reign was about as worthless as her first but at least there’s the title reign for Velvet which has taken forever to get to. Not the big moment they were looking for though.

Kaz doesn’t know who to cheer for in the I Quit match but he hopes Daniels sees the light after it’s over.

We recap Daniels vs. Styles #4895 which is about Daniels being way too excited about beating him on a fluke and turning heel on him, setting up an I Quit match.

AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

It sounds like new music for both guys. AJ has another new remix. This is I Quit. There’s also no pyro for anyone tonight so far. The guys have the mic here and it’s a brawl to start. Daniels is asking if it’s over about 30 seconds in with a choke on AJ. AJ hooks a bridging Indian Deathlock and Daniels says no. We’re in that place in the match where they’re trying for fast submissions but no one believes it’s happening yet.

AJ hits his leapfrog/drop/dropkick spot and we head to the floor. AJ hits a flip dive and both guys are down. They find a tool box and Daniels tries to stab AJ with a screwdriver. The maiming attempt fails and they fight to the apron where they botch some kind of a suplex move. The screwdriver is stuck in the buckle. AJ has pink on his tights for breast cancer awareness month. Nothing wrong with that.

AJ still won’t quit so Daniels busts out the BME to AJ while he’s on his knees, making it more like Shadows Over Hell (Delirious move). Off to a half crab and of course AJ doesn’t quit. A spin kick is blocked and Daniels gets a backbreaker. There’s no eyeliner on Daniels either which is a weird look. He’s in tights instead of shorts too. It’s chair time and Chris sits down on it with the bar over AJ’s throat. Styles is bleeding over the top of the head, right around his hairline.

Daniels says everything AJ has in TNA will belong to him and he never wanted to hear AJ say I qu….”oh no I’m not saying it.” The fans chant for him to shut up and Daniels lets up for some reason. He looks into the camera and talks to Wendy (AJ’s wife) and says take the kids out of the room because they shouldn’t see their father murdered. Yeah this isn’t overkill at all.

AJ gets fired up and hits the backflip reverse DDT. Styles Clash fails and Daniels misses the BME. He shouts DIE AJ but runs into the Pele and the Clash. So….how does this make Daniels say he quits? AJ picks up the chair but grabs the screwdriver instead. And Daniels quits to avoid the pain ala JBL vs. Cena in 05. He quit at 13:52.

Rating: C. I’m not a fan of these matches because the ending is either the heel giving up after being hurt for a few seconds or giving up before something big happening. I wasn’t into this and the fans weren’t really either. I think they were going for a big ending and emotional moment but it never got to the level they were hoping for.

As AJ is leaving, Daniels jumps him and plants him with Angel’s Wings on the ramp, meaning this is going to continue.

We recap the final two matches on the card but here’s Jeff Jarrett.

He yells about Jeff Hardy and says no one here wants anything to do with Hardy. The fans chant for Hardy as Jarrett buries the city. He calls out Hardy and here he is with new music. They brawl with Hardy only saying a few words and it’s a brawl. This isn’t a match. Security comes out to break it up but Hardy gets free for a bit as happens in most brawls. That happens with both guys more than once. The agents come in and we get a D’lo chant. Hardy is left in the ring and poses to his music.

We recap Hogan vs. Sting. I’m shocked this isn’t the main event. The recap covers like a year and a half which is all about Hogan stealing the company from Dixie and Sting trying to get the control back for Dixie because it’s her’s.

Now the announcers talk about the match and how big it is.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

This is a “fight” remember, so Hogan is in an Impact Wrestling shirt and black tights. Dixie Carter is in the audience. If Hogan loses, Sting and Dixie get control of the company. Sting is in his Hogan shirt again. Jackson James, Bischoff’s son, is the referee. Before anything of note happens, Hogan waves out someone and it’s Flair. Dixie isn’t happy. And they lock up. We get a headlock in this “fight”.

Hogan Hulks Up and there goes the bandana. Sting throws off the Hogan shirt too. The fans sound into it so points for that. Hogan puts on a neck crank and we look at Dixie again. It’s in a rest hold so no complaints there. Hogan keeps crotch chopping. All Hogan so far with him sending Sting to the floor so Flair can pound away a bit with chops and a low blow.

All Hulk still as he hammers away on Sting on the floor. There’s some kind of object given to Hogan by Flair and Hulk pounds away with it. Sting is busted and Hogan struts and WOOs. Sting fires back and Hogan is in trouble. He keeps going to the floor to chase Flair and this time gets the object from him. Flair tries to warn Hulk but he can’t get away in time. Hulk is busted.

There’s the splash and down goes Flair. Hogan takes another splash and Hogan is down in the middle of the ring. Here’s the Scorpion and Sting gets it on full. He sits down on it and Hogan taps out right in front of the referee…..and he rings the bell for the submission at 9:49. The fans are not happy….like at all.

Rating: D+. The ending hurt it a lot but the fans were WAY into this. Tis is a fine example of a match where the match wasn’t the important part. However, there was nothing important to see here and the ending didn’t work at all for the most part. Keeping it short was good but Eric’s son wound up meaning almost nothing at all.

Immortal runs out for the beatdown with the chairs and Abyss is watching from behind the stage. Eric sets for a chair shot but his son takes the chair away. Down goes the son and Hulk is getting up. For no apparent reason Hulk turns face and beats up Immortal. Hogan and Sting clean house and Flair takes the brunt of the beating. Bischoff is cowering in the corner.

Hogan and Sting go back to back and stare each other down. They don’t shake hands but Hogan beats up Bischoff. This makes absolutely NO SENSE but the fans are more into it than anything ever in TNA. Hogan says he’s back and kicks Bischoff out of the ring. Hogan and Sting stare it down again and Sting wants Hogan to pose. They play to the crowd and that’s about it.

We recap Roode vs. Angle and I think you know the drill here.

TNA World Title: Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle

It’s 10:36 when the bell rings so they have about 20 minutes or so, barring them going right up to the hour. They head to the floor for a few seconds and Angle kicks him low on the way back in. Angle is coming in with a legit hamstring injury. They go to the mat and Angle works on a gutwrench. The fans are all behidn Roode. The American hits a German on the Canadian and make it three of them, getting a two count.

Kurt sets for the moonsault but Roode suplexes him off and Kurt lands on his head. The fans went SILENT after that. Kurt seems to be ok as they slug it out. Roode hits a forearm and some clotheslines to take over. Blockbuster hits for what looked to be three but they’ll call it two. Belly to belly gets two for the champ as does a DDT. Angle Slam is countered into the spinebuster (no pop at all for it) for two.

Angle does the run up the rope suplex for two. They’re really just using signature stuff here instead of a longer match. Roode grabs the Crossface out of nowhere and Kurt can’t reach a rope. Angle teases tapping but he grabs the ankle to escape the hold. Now Roode is in the submission and teases tapping but reverses right back into the Crossface in the middle of the ring. Angle reverses again and is put in the hold on the other arm this time. Kurt rolls through into the Slam for two.

Back to the ankle but Roode kicks him off and hits the spinebuster to still not much of a reaction. The crowd just does not care after the Hogan vs. Sting stuff. Fisherman’s suplex gets two. The dueling chants start up and Kurt hooks the ankle again. Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag as the fans are starting to get into this a bit. Angle gets the referee in between them and kicks Roode low. There’s another Slam and it only gets two again.

Time for more rolling Germans but Roode reverses into the Crossface again, this time on the left arm which is the one that I think it’s been on more often than the right one. Roode’s face is really bad when he’s got these holds on. Kurt’s arm is under the ropes so the hold is broken. Spear gets two for Angle. I’m so over the move I can’t stand it anymore. Angle goes up for something but jumps into the Crossface. Kurt escapes and tries the Slam but Roode tries the Fisherman’s into another Slam and Kurt grabs the rope….for the pin at 14:20. Oh….oh no they can’t be doing this. Roode’s arm was under the ropes too.

Rating: C. The ending cripples this. It wasn’t a classic before that but the ending hurt it more than I can comprehend. The match was so based on having finishers escaped and kicked out of and all that stuff which was the vast majority of the match. Not horrible but man, that ending is actually standing and it’s over. That CRIPPLED things.

Overall Rating: B+. The ending to this show brings it way down. I mean WAY down. There isn’t a truly bad match on the whole card but there isn’t a classic either. Still, it’s a very good show and worth checking out, but the ending to the main event hurt this like nothing else. There was zero point to having Angle go over there and he was helped out by the trainer post match so maybe he was legit hurt. I’m in awe over that ending. The rest of the show was solid though and Hogan’s illogical heel turn is fun stuff. Worth seeing, but prepared to roll your eyes at the main event.

Results
Austin Aries b. Brian Kendrick – Brainbuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jerry Lynn – Van Terminator
Crimson b. Samoa Joe and Matt Morgan – Spear to Joe
Mr. Anderson b. Bully Ray – Mic Check through a table
Velvet Sky b. Winter, Mickie James and Madison Rayne – Sitout facebuster to Rayne
AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels – Daniels said he quit
Sting b. Hulk Hogan – Scorpion Deathlock
Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode – Angle Slam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Impact
Date: October 14, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
Episode Title: THEY Have Arrived!!!

Well this is it. After four days of waiting we can finally get to the explanation from Jeff as to WHY he did what he did. This is something that is very important because you have the entire THEY angle riding on it. The importance of this show can’t be overblown as we begin the next chapter in TNA’s history.

The opening is likely to be about Jeff and THEY as well as set up the fairly obvious RVD vs. Jeff match, although I could see them postponing that one if need be. I’d also be interested in knowing how much actual wrestling we’ll have tonight but we’ll see. Let’s get to it.

We of course open with the recap of the ending of Bound For Glory.

Dixie’s attorney is here and as everyone thought we’re told that Dixie signed the contracts but they weren’t the ones she thought they were.

Hogan (still on crutches) and Bischoff are here to a MASSIVE pyro display. Of course Hogan is acting just like he did as a face. Tenay explains that Hogan and Bischoff now have the majority share of TNA….despite the fact that the attorney never said that.

Naturally Hogan gets a big face reaction with like two signs against him in the whole audience. Oh wait three fat chicks are booing. Well there’s a Hogan sucks chant so there’s something I suppose. Hogan wants Dixie here now. Apparently she promised him everything, much like Ted Turner did in 96. Hogan gets a text or something as he has his phone out and is messing with it.

Here we go: the explanation. It started with Abyss apparently and the Hall of Fame ring. Bischoff and Hogan knew why he randomly turned on Hogan. We bring him out and Hogan declares Abyss his son. THEY’RE HERE! Ok now that my pizzas are here we can get back. What did you think I meant by they?

None of the fans believed Abyss but they are now in control. The fans want RVD. Abyss follows them as Hogan and Bischoff’s soldier now. Hogan declares that Abyss with live forever and is now immortal. I think The Immortals might be the name. Eric brings out Jarrett. Wait was there an actual explanation in there for abyss? If there was I missed it.

Yeah this was no real surprise: he wanted control of his company back. I think that was the easiest of all to understand. And here’s FOURTUNE! Ok this just got good.

Flair talks to Hogan and says that Fourtune runs this company, not Hogan. LOUD Fourtune chant. One of them have to leave apparently. Hogan suggest him vs. Flair and it’s…..not on as they hug. Flair bows down to Hogan and it’s a massive Hogan orgy more or less. The explanation here makes sense though as Fourtune was mad at Dixie for bringing in EV. That actually makes sense. We get a reference to Flair’s five former ex wives and here comes Jeff!

No face paint here either. The fans think Jeff sold out. You can barely see the ropes with so many guys in there with him. He didn’t sell out but sold in. He blames the fans and doesn’t care about popularity. The fans drove him to this because he did everything with all those injuries for what?

And now it’s on to RVD. He’s the whole F’N reason Abyss took RVD out because RVD had to be gone for this to work. They are Immortal. Sting and Nash are watching in the back. Eric and Hogan offer them spots on the team. We go to a break 22 minutes into the show with them coming to the ring.

Security escorts Dixie….somewhere.

Nash and Sting come out and Sting is in street clothes which isn’t something you see that often. Tenay is already annoying. Eric says this is about money and all that jazz. Nash whispers to Sting and says this is perfect for him because it’s always been about money and him in his career. He’s gotten wiser though and quotes the Bible of all things, saying gray hair is a sign of wisdom. He’s passing on the money and if THEY want to run the company into the ground, they can do it without him. I’m surprised.

Sting says this isn’t what he came here for and says he’s here because he loves TNA. He’s shouting the whole time mind you. Sting points to Hogan, Bischoff and Flair (I think) and says this is a no win situation, turning them down. Allegedly both of these guys are leaving TNA with Nash being permanent and Sting possibly being permanent. Bischoff says they can come back anytime. Hogan’s music plays the segment to an end at 9:32.

We cut to the back where Sting and Nash leave but Pope isn’t happy with it. They offer him a place in the car out with them but he’s staying to fight the fight which they’re cool with. Dixie comes up to them and says they can’t leave her. Sting says what everyone thought: if she had listened this wouldn’t be happening. She says he was cryptic. Dixie, he sent crows down at the NWO to demand a title match one night. He’s a weird guy.

Hogan and Bischoff come up to Dixie and she slaps the heck out of Bischoff. She tells Hogan to look her in the eye and tell her he didn’t screw her. He says we’ll talk about this in HIS office as we go to another break.

In the office we have MORE talking. Bischoff smokes a cigar and Hogan flat out tells her that he screwed her out of the company. This is a big Hogan ego trip of course. Hogan and Bischoff both say this is their company. Hogan has had enough and so has Dixie. She tells her security guards to get rid of them but they work for Hogan too. Dixie’s husband SURGE gets knocked out and we take ANOTHER break.

Some hot chick in a BMW shows up. And we’re just not going to talk about this at all. Ok then. Ah ok it’s the Jersey Short chick.

Madison comes out with a referee as I’m guessing this is going to be about Tara. She yells about how Tara has HER title. She wants a match RIGHT NOW. Here’s Tara, looking GOOD. Madison says they had a deal and apparently we’re getting a match….at 9:50pm.

Knockouts Title: Tara vs. Madison Rayne

And Tara lays down so Madison can pin her. I kid you not.

Madison celebrates and here’s Mickie to talk some more. She wants a title shot RIGHT NOW but Madison sends Tara after her. Mickie sends her running and stares her down.

J-Woww from Jersey Shore comes in and talks to the Beautiful People. Apparently she’s an honorary BP tonight.

Back from break and they’re still looking for Cookie. This results in Eric Young freaking out about J-Woww. Jordan comes up and nothing of note happens.

And here’s Angle for MORE talking. No music, no intro, nothing like that. He talks about how he’s all banged up but wants to know why Hogan and Bischoff screwed him before he officially retires. Angle says what we all expected him to say: he didn’t win but he didn’t get pinned either. Cue Jarrett’s music and here he is.

Jarrett more or less calls bull on what Angle is saying. He takes a jab at Angle being an ex-husband (the real meaning being that Jarrett literally married Angle’s wife and not in kayfabe). Angle says he put TNA on the map. Uh, not quite Kurt. He says Jarrett held down everyone but couldn’t hold Angle down.

Kurt Angle, the man that held the tag titles, X-Division and World titles at the same time is talking about holding others down. Jarrett says taking Angle’s career meant more than destroying his life. Angle goes for him and the security guards take him down and handcuff him. The beatdown is on. Uh, Joe anyone?

TAZ of all people comes out of the broadcast booth and calls off Jarrett and says that he has a censored up (censored of course) neck. Old school Taz chant takes us to another break.

70 minutes in, 6 seconds of “wrestling.”

Joe talks (shocking isn’t it) about Jarrett on a tape from Monday, still in Daytona. He’s coming for Jarrett of course.

GOOD NIGHT IT’S A MATCH! And it’s Abyss. Oh joy.

Abyss vs. Samoa Joe

Yeah they’re officially called Immortal. Well ok then. Joe beats the tar out of him first and beats him into the corner. Chokeslam takes him down and Joe is in trouble. He goes to get a chair but Joe hits a suicide dive into the chair which more or less didn’t hit Abyss’s head at all but he stays down anyway. Sure why not? Bell to the head and we’re done in two minutes. No rating. RVD comes down for the save.

Wait, why didn’t Joe come down and massacre Jeff like 5 minutes ago?

Hey look RVD wants to talk. It’s about Hardy which makes sense. Jeff pops up on the screen and says it was an illusion as he brought RVD as close to him as he could and then destroyed him. Well ok so he told Abyss to destroy him. Hardy says he’s the Anti-Christ of wrestling. WOW.

Bischoff comes out and says if RVD wants Hardy at Turning Point he has to beat Anderson tonight, winner gets the shot.

Back from a break Tessmacher is propositioned by Bischoff for “a meeting later at his place”. He snaps on her and calls her easy. Bischoff knows about Nash and Pope apparently. She’s fired from the Knockouts authority job and can either wrestle or leave. Anderson comes up and declares Bischoff a douchebag and squeezes his hand really hard saying that Bischoff won’t win this war.

D’Angeol Dinero vs. Fourtune

Yep it’s 1 vs. 5 here. Morgan and Flair aren’t in this. Total dominance here of course but it’s better than more talking I suppose. AJ misses the Pele and kicks Kaz which Pope gets two off of. DWI hits him and Kaz gets the pin. Another short match so no grade.

Ad for Turning Point where Angle is named specifically as being there. Nice one guys.

Here’s The Shore to get on my nerves and be booed out of the building. They point out that this is on at the same time as Jersey Shore because that’s how TNA works. Cue up the Beautiful People and J-Woww. Cookie and J-Woww argue as usual and Cookie says go back to the hole you came from. You know, the same one she’s from. Catfight, Shore bails. 15k for a minute long segment and an EY joke.

We recap things to kill time so we can run over into ReAction as always.

Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

No mic time for Anderson here as he’s ticked. The bell rings at about 11pm as we just HAD to have a commercial as RVD made his entrance. Make that 11:01. Naturally to see the main event of Impact you have to watch ReAction. So would that mean the winner got the win on Impact or ReAction? Winner gets Hardy at the PPV mind you.

Basic stuff to start as Van Dam hits a moonsault off the apron to kick Anderson in the head, which might have been how he injured his head and Impact is OVER! And now REACTION has started and we didn’t miss a thing and it serves no purpose but screw that who cares? If you want to see the Impact main event, don’t watch Impact!

After I have a psychotic episode over the stupidity of some of the things this company does, it’s still a boring match. Rolling Thunder is countered into a fireman’s carry and the split legged moonsault gets two. Five Star eats knees and both guys are down. And here’s Bischoff to screw us over. He tells the referee to come with him and here’s Hardy, holding his ribs with a chair.

Chair to RVD. Chair to Anderson. Pillmanizer on the arm of Anderson. Anderson curses a lot and rolls to the floor. That’s your ending by the way.

Rating: D+. Match was pretty weak due to the crowd knowing the ridiculous ending was coming. This match never really got off the ground or anything but it could have been worse. The guys knew the ending was coming and clearly didn’t get going until the very end as they were just going through the motions. Nothing bad really, but nothing particularly good.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a VERY subjective grade to put it mildly. This show can be looked at their get out of jail free card. It was the first show after their biggest show ever and a huge angle. The show as a stand alone show was atrocious. However, this was a show where a lot of talking was actually required.

The explanations that they gave needed to be done. I can understand that and I’m mostly ok with it. However there comes a point where you need some wrestling to get you through a show. Having the show revolve around one angle is fine and makes sense, but you really need some wrestling to go with it. As was said in the LD, even a 4 minute throw away match would have helped tremendously. One or two of those thrown in somewhere and this show goes WAY up.

As for doing what needed to be done tonight, they got a lot out of the way. Jarrett, Dixie, Hogan and Bischoff are all explained. Nash and Sting are written off TV, Pope has a new thing to do, Anderson’s loyalty is pretty clear and RVD and Joe will fight on their own. Hardy was explained but to say it felt rushed is an understatement. Abyss wasn’t explained at all but did we really need to hear about him? All you really get from that is the beginning of the story and we can live without that.

This show did explain some things and kind of got things going for the angle, but at the same time this is showing signs of turning into one massive soap opera much like the NWO angle. The problem with that is back then you had some amazing matches on the side to compliment the drama. You’re not getting that in the first week.

That being said, it’s the first week and I can understand a ton of talking here. However if this is now the status quo, there are REAL problems for this company. This was kind of a disappointment but to say it was horrible isn’t fair. They got through a lot tonight, but what scares me are the weeks to come. There has to be some wrestling out there, and I’m not seeing it here so far. I’m neither thrilled nor optimistic, but I’m also not convinced this is bad. Definitely interested in next week’s offering, but I’ll be less lenient on it to say the least.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Saturday Night’s Main Event 28
Date: October 13, 1990
Location: Toledo Sports Arena, Toledo, Ohio
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

This is just after Summerslam 90 where Hogan made his triumphant return. He has his big match tonight teaming with Tugboat against Rhythm and Blues. Other than that there’s just Sgt. Slaughter being evil and beating up Koko B. Ware. There just isn’t much on this card as we’re in a transitional show to an extent as we’re waiting on a new top heel to come up. Let’s get to it.

It’s Oktoberfest. We get to hear the production guy saying we’re on the air. Oh dear. Piper shows up in lederhosen.

I still love that theme song.

Demolition says they’re going to beat up the LOD.

The LOD say Demolition doesn’t scare them. This is interspersed with Oktoberfest jokes. Warrior, their partner, pops up. Yeah I have no idea what he said.

Ultimate Warrior/Legion of Doomvs. Demolition

Has there ever been a better collection of theme music in one match? The LOD cost Demolition the tag belts and Warrior is there….uh because. This would be a Survivor Series match in a month with Hennig and Tornado joining them. Piper points this out. We get a shot of Dustin Rhodes in the crowd. Keep that in mind as it’ll come into play later on. Warrior comes in and just destroys people.

The splash misses Axe though and he’s Smash. Demolition was more or less worthless by this point and would get squashed at Mania and be done. Hawk comes in and just wipes them out. You can see the crushing of them beginning. He continues the trend of beating all of Demolition by himself. Everybody comes in and brawls but Smash is more or less dead and gets caught by the splash for the pin. This was domination in every sense of the word.

Rating: D. Just not interesting at all as Demolition was made to look like a bunch of jobbers here. I don’t think anyone ever bought them anymore once the LOD showed up. Not the worst match ever, but a little challenge would have been nice.

We go to the Oktoberfest celebration and a lot of wrestlers are there. Alfred Hayes is talking about beer with a German guy.

Randy Savage vs. Dusty Rhodes

This is a rematch from Summerslam. Savage wanted a shot at Warrior and DiBiase was about to feud with Rhodes. Dusty looks like a freaking moron, wearing a big black shirt with red polka dots. Now remember, Dustin is in the front row. After about three minutes of NOTHING interesting, Ted DiBiase is in the front row.

He starts paying people off so he can have the whole front row to himself. I get images of Cartman from the episode where he gets his own theme park here. Dustin of course isn’t for sale and stays in his seat. This just isn’t interesting. Savage can’t slam Dusty. That’s just funny.

He’s a power guy according to a lot of you. DiBiase and Virgil jump and beat the living heck out of him, which is about as clean cut of a definition of assault and battery as you could ask for but we’ll ignore that for storyline purposes. Rhodes goes to save his son and gets counted out. This led to a tag match at the Rumble which was Dusty’s last WWF match.

Rating: D. This was an angle rather than a match. They were just killing time in the ring until the angle could get going. There just wasn’t much at all going on here, but at the same time this was just to set up DiBiase vs. Rhodes so that’s fine.

Tugboat and Hogan say their usual stuff. Hogan dances. Yeah. They want Earthquake and Bravo. They want to know what’s going to happen when Hogan and Tugboat Bavarian Cream Rhythm and Blues. Oh dear.

The Bushwackers are making cheese. It turns into cutting cheese jokes. Alfred still won’t talk as he’s telling stories to the German guy.

Rhythm and Blues vs. Hulk Hogan/Tugboat

Rhythm and Blues are Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine in a dumb tag team. Tugboat is here because he got the people to try to make Hogan feel better when he got hurt. Do you ever feel sorry for Fred Ottman? Can we buy this guy a decent gimmick? Not even a good one but a decent one? This goes exactly how you would expect it to: Hogan destroys them by himself and they bail.

This is about as weak of a match as you could ask for. Naturally Tugboat gets caught by a Valentine axe handle which he sells like a hatchet to the head. Vince says that Tugboat is beached. You know, like a whale. The Blowhole Kid dodges some elbows and gets Hogan in to clean house. Hogan goes for the legdrop but here come Earthquake and Bravo.

They don’t get to the ring or anything though. Back to the match after a commercial, Tugboat takes a guitar to the back for the DQ. Here comes your monster heel and it’s a big beatdown. Tugboat is off somewhere in search of a Twinkie. Tugboad FINALLY realizes he’s at work and pops Quake with the guitar to send them running.

Rating: D+. Again, just more of an angle than a match as no one cared about who won or lost here. This was just to set up more Survivor Series stuff which is fine I suppose, but at the same time I wish they could have had a better way of doing it. Not sure what that way would have been though.

It’s time for a sausage stuffing contest and Gene says Genius is a master of it and is in the sausage stuffing hall of fame. Gay jokes were easier in the early 90s I guess. It’s Hacksaw and the Hart Foundation vs. Fuji and the Orient Express. Who would believe that Bret would have a title today? It’s the most you can do in a minute. Gene says we’re getting down to the short strokes. It goes like 45 seconds and there’s no winner. Hayes is still telling jokes to the German guy.

Intercontinental Title: Texas Tornado vs. Haku

I think this happened at Mania also. I love how at this point taking a match on ten days’ notice is a huge deal. Now you get matches on hours or even minutes notice. This is really short as Haku goes to the nerve hold early on but shifts to a sleeper. Tornado comes back and hits the Claw and the Tornado Punch to retain.

Rating: N/A. Just a way to make his title reign seem legit before he dropped it back to Hennig soon enough. I think it was in December or so.

Hogan and Tugboat make sailing jokes and talk about how his ribs are.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Koko B. Ware

I wonder how this is going to go. Slaughter just became a major heel at this time and we were in Desert Storm at the moment. You could always kind of tell that Piper hated this angle and supported the troops. Koko starts off kind of hot then realizes he’s Koko and gets beaten on.

He makes the short comeback but takes a hotshot and actually just drives his knuckles into the side of Koko’s head. It’s the dumbest looking finisher I’ve ever seen but it works. Then in a cool moment as Slaughter is waving the Iraqi flag, Stars and Stripes Forever kicks on and Nikolai Volkoff is waving the American flag. Awesome visual if nothing else.

Rating: D-. More dullness as I want this show to end. Koko continued his tradition of jobbing like there was no tomorrow. Slaughter wound up being world champion out of this so there you go.

Neidhart and Slick have a bit of a dance off. And now there’s a food fight. Hayes still isn’t paying attention.

Warrior says he doesn’t like Sherri for slapping him and that he’ll fight Savage.

Savage and Sherri say Savage will be champion again.

Hayes yells at Gene and gets pied.

Allegedly the next SNME would be just after Survivor Series. That didn’t happen. Ah apparently it did but it was The Main Event and on a Friday. That makes sense I guess.

Overall Rating: F-. Just boring beyond belief with nothing of note and nothing being any good. This was a weird cross between a buildup show and a transitional show but neither worked. Probably the worst one yet which is saying a lot. Terrible show with nothing worth seeing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Is the Dungeon of Doom.  It’s true.Think about it.  Let’s look at what they accomplished:

1. They won a lot of titles.

2 World Titles

1 US Title

1 Tag Title (Half)

1 TV Title

Not too bad for being around about two years.

2. They stopped face Hulk Hogan’s year plus long title reign.  That means Giant did what Flair, Vader, Luger, Sting and Savage couldn’t do, and he did it in his debut match.

3. Those two world titles came from Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair.  One other man has ever done that and his name is Sting.  It took Giant seven months.  It took Sting seven years.

4. Kevin Sullivan had a forgotten classic at Bash at the Beach 1996 against Chris Benoit.  I’ll take that match over the Bret vs. Shawn Iron Man match any day.

5. Yeah they were stupid, but look at the NWO with all of their changes and backstabbing and Hogan destroying a company.  Wrestling was built on being over the top and insane so why was it bad when the Dungeon did it?

Saturday Night’s Main Event 7
Date: October 4, 1986
Location: Coliseum at Richfield, Richfield, Ohio
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

This is more or less the beginning of Hogan vs. Orndorff and not much else. We’re not quite to the build for Mania but we’re getting closer. Not a lot is going on here as this is pretty much the end of the summer series of matches. Back in the day you had a lot more summer feuds as you had two sets of house shows touring the country.

For example you would have Hogan vs. Orndorff in half the country and Roberts vs. Steamboat in the other. That’s kind of cool when you think about it and they were far big enough matches to carry the fans’ interest. Either way this is just kind of an off the wall show where they just kind of threw it together with whoever they had there. Let’s get to it though.

Roberts, in regular tights which just looks odd, says he’s ready for Steamboat and he’ll win.

Johnny V. says the Dream Team will win tonight.

Kamala is a savage.

Orndorff is ready.

Hogan says he’ll get back at Orndorff.

Dang I love this intro.

Piper is hurt apparently. Adonis, Muraco and Orton hurt him. Piper is freaking TICKED and says he’s fighting anyway. This was great.

Hogan says that he’s mad at Orndorff but he’ll get him back tonight. Hogan says he’s old. This was 23 years ago. For those of you that don’t know, Orndorff had turned face to help Hogan fight Piper and Orton and they were best friends. One day Heenan started saying Hogan didn’t care about him so he called his house saying he could get him any time.

Hogan couldn’t come to the phone as he was working out. This made Orndorff think he wasn’t important and Heenan accepted him. Basically Orndorff just wanted appreciation which isn’t asking for much is it? Orndorff does something most interesting; he steals Hogan’s music. There’s a great feud there somewhere.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff

We start off very fast but some cheating from Heenan has our hero in trouble! We go to the floor and they beat on each other quite a bit. Ok make that Hogan takes a beating including from the microphone cord. Vince says there are over 20,000 people here, which is what the first Survivor Series brought there in about a year.

I find that a bit odd. Paul gets more offense in than I would expect but there’s your traditional comeback by Hogan. Heenan grabs the foot though and cops show up to throw him out. That’s original back then I guess. They literally pick him up and carry him off and we go to a break with Heenan trying to get out of the cell thing they put him in.

Paul beats on him a bit more but then the piledriver is reversed and Hogan does his usual. Adrian Adonis runs in for the DQ and Piper comes in to save Hogan. That’s just odd to type. Adonis has a bad arm injury as it’s just hanging there. Ventura hates Piper as a face.

Rating: C-. This was hard for them to mess up as they had it about 200 times in a year. They raked in money though so it was worth it. They would have a far more famous cage match in two SNMEs to blow it off before Andre returned for the angle with Hogan. This was fine though.

Jake Roberts vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is a Snake Pit match which means nothing at all. Gene interviews Jake and Damien in the shower of all places. Roberts had dropped Steamboat on his head at the previous SNME and then Steamboat had beat him at a huge show called The Big Event in Toronto which is coming up soon. This is match three I guess.

Steamboat has a bag of his own and Jake doesn’t even get an entrance. Ricky has his own dragon that can eat snakes I guess. Steamboat is freaking moving out there. Steamboat’s bag is moving like crazy. This is all Steamboat until a top rope splash misses. It becomes a battle of the bags as both guys try to get to theirs’ first and it’s not working so we try the wrestling thing again. It amuses me that Vince is a former world champion and Jesse isn’t.

There’s something just hilarious about that. This is fairly back and forth until Ricky gets a crucifix for the pin. Jake of course jumps him and then we have the showdown of the animals. The Dragon wins.

Rating; C-. This was ok but just ok. There was nothing special here but in just over six minutes there’s not a ton you can get going. This was the other hot feud in 86 so having it on TV made a lot of sense.

Hogan says that he was really turned on and turns it into a courtroom analogy of some kind. He also tells Piper to not save him again.

We go to earlier in the day to see Slick and Sheik arriving and saying they’re ready for whoever is replacing Piper tonight. Sheik has to take his clothes off to pose.

Roddy Pipervs. Iron Sheik

It’s apparently 1983. Piper comes down anyway and says he’s fighting here. Piper starts going after Slick and then after getting pounded on for about 30 seconds Piper gets a small package for the win.

Rating: N/A. No clue what the point of this was. Apparently this was a great victory for him.

We hear from the Dream Team who say they’ll win.

Piper calls out Adonis like a freaking CRAZY man. This never gets old as his attention to detail was second to none.

Tag Titles: Dream Team vs. British Bulldogs

To the shock of no one this is 2/3 falls. We start with Dynamite and Valentine. Oh yeah it’s Valentine and Beefcake making up the Dream Team. Somehow this is a higher profile match for Beefcake than the main event of Starrcade 94. The Bulldogs are hard to tell apart but Davey is bigger if nothing else.

Not by much though. You can definitely see Dynamite in Benoit. Valentine can’t decide if he wants to work on the arm or the knee. Your finishing move is the figure four. Use your blonde head buddy. Dynamite gives up in the figure four, making it two straight matches on SNME where the Bulldogs have tapped out.

We cut to the locker room where Gene says that Adonis might have a separated shoulder and we go to a replay showing how it likely happened.

After a commercial we have fall 2. This is more or less heel dominance even though they have as much of a chance of winning here as X and I do. Davey gets the hot tag and dominates. I love that vertical suplex. The powerslam puts Valentine down and then Brutus comes in for the save.

He gets caught in a fireman’s carry and after a tag, Dynamite jumps on top of his back and hits a super diving headbutt for the pin to tie us up. After a commercial we have Dynamite and Valentine. Dynamite’s knee was hurt for the better part of a year as steroid abuse just went crazy. Adonis has a shattered elbow apparently. The heels are completely dominating here until we get a brawl as Davey makes the save after a high knee. With Dynamite on Valentine, Davey gets a fisherman’s suplex for the pin.

Rating: B. Solid stuff here with the psychology of the knee working through the entire match and the great balance here. It was another win for the champions which is never bad. This worked pretty well though and it was four good workers so there we are.

Kamala vs. Lanny Poffo

Ok what are you expecting with three minutes left in the show? It’s a total 80s squash, making it AWESOME.

Rating: B+. All for being quick and Kamala scaring the heck out of me back in the day.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a far more fun show than others. It’s got a good tag title match and the two hottest feuds on the planet at the time. Ok so it doesn’t have Magnum vs. Flair but whatever. This is worth seeing though as we approach some epic feuds. Check this out.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 3, 2013
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re still in Arkansas and the main story is still Dixie Carter vs. Hulk Hogan, despite us only having three more Impacts until the biggest show of the year. Tonight is about Hogan’s decision on whether or not to join Dixie’s side in whatever she thinks she’s doing. If we’re lucky we might even get Bully and AJ in the same ring for the first time for the build to their match. Let’s get to it.

We open with the customary recap of last week’s events.

Here’s AJ to address the crowd. He can appreciate Hogan trying to come out here last week and smooth things over, but then Dixie Carter came out and showed her true colors. AJ isn’t here to talk about Dixie or Hogan though. Instead he wants to talk about his opponent at Bound For Glory. What a refreshing idea. He knows exactly who Bully Ray is: the man that he’ll beat at Bound For Glory for the world title. Styles doesn’t have a contract right now and hasn’t even looked at the world title in over a year. He’s coming to get what’s his at Bound For Glory, but here’s Bully Ray to object.

Bully says Dixie is in AJ’s head because AJ is just hoping to win. If AJ was really in the game, he would know that he’s going to win rather than just hoping. AJ doesn’t have to worry about Dixie in San Diego though, because Bully will give him all he can handle. Look at what Ray has done to people like Hogan, Hardy or D-Von. What do you think he’ll do to a guy like Styles? AJ knows who he is: the man that beat AJ in a last man standing match two years ago. AJ has one thing Ray wants: he wants to take Styles away from the fans. Bully is sick of hearing the fans chant AJ, and there’s the chant again.

Styles says that Bully is just like Dixie Carter, but Ray takes that as a compliment. Dixie is a millionaire and a somebody while Bully is a millionaire and the World Heavyweight Champion. Ray goes OFF on AJ, ranting about how he’s going to beat AJ into the ground and send him back home to his trailer, wife and three kids. AJ thinks Ray is going to get killed in his match tonight against Samoa Joe, which is a surprise to Ray.

Magnus is going to run the EGO gauntlet tonight.

Dixie has AJ escorted out by security but he leaves on his own so he doesn’t have to breathe the same air Dixie is breathing.

Kenny King/Chris Sabin vs. Manik/Jeff Hardy

Austin Aries is on commentary. Manik and King get us going with Kenny taking him into the corner for some choking by Sabin. Chris comes in legally but the double team doesn’t work as King is caught in a springboard hurricanrana to send him into the corner. Off to Jeff to speed things up and hit a middle rope splash on King for two. Back to Manik for something resembling an octopus hold on King before rolling him up for two. King’s cut from last week has busted open again.

King snaps Manik throat first across the top rope before bringing Sabin back in for a basement dropkick. Manik is tied up in the Tree of Woe so Sabin can stand on his crotch for some torture and a two count. Back to King for some right hands before Sabin comes back in for some choking in the corner.

Chris runs into a boot in the corner and a middle rope dropkick (Aries: “Right in the brain stem!”) puts Sabin down. Hardy comes in off the hot tag and cleans house with the sitout gordbuster on King for two. Sabin breaks up the Twist attempt on King as everything breaks down. Manik sends Sabin to the floor and hits his double chicken wing gutbuster on King, setting up the Swanton for the pin at 7:07.

Rating: C+. This was fine and set up whatever match we’re going to see for the title at Bound For Glory. Kenny King doesn’t really fit into the three former world champions against the X-Division Champion but it’s not the worst idea in the world. It could bring some blood into the division which has been anemic for years now.

Post match Sabin goes after Manik but Aries makes the save. Austin asks for a four way match with Manik, Sabin, Hardy and himself for the title at Bound For Glory.

Sting and Hogan have a legends powwow about what Hogan should do. Hulk declares Dixie worse than Bischoff before a girl delivers a gift from Dixie. It’s a watch, the same one that Dixie gave Sting as a retirement gift. Hogan: “She is worse than Bischoff. He never gave me anything.”

We look at EGO jumping Magnus last week. Later in the night Sting asked Magnus what happened. Magnus says they’re in his head and he wants all three of them on his own next week (tonight). He’s icing his knee but says it’s just tweeked.

EGO vs. Magnus

It’s a gauntlet match with Daniels up first. Magnus jumps Daniels in the corner but Chris comes back with elbows to the neck. Daniels gets shouldered down and asks for a breather, only to get kicked in the ribs for his efforts. Chris goes to the throat to slow the Brit down before bulldogging him throat first on the top rope. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Daniels can’t hit Angel’s Wings. Magnus comes back with a clothesline but jumps into the Koji Clutch. He’s right next to the ropes though so Daniels goes up for the BME, only to land on Magnus’ bad leg. The Falcon’s Arrow eliminates Daniels at 3:55.

Kazarian is up next and Magnus doesn’t wait for him to get to the ring. We take a break and come back with Kazarian raking the eyes to escape a press slam. A dropkick puts Magnus down again for two but he comes back with right hands out of the corner. Magnus punches him down and drops the top rope elbow for two. He goes up but gets kicked in the chest, only to roll through Fade to Black into the Cloverleaf for the submission at 12:37 total.

Last up is Bobby Roode but Kaz clips Magnus’ knee and crunches it in between his own legs. Roode goes after the leg as we take a break. Back with Roode still working on the knee like a smart heel would. Roode can’t get a figure four, allowing Magnus to fight up and hit another Falcon’s Arrow for a quick two. He tries the Cloverleaf again but can’t sit down on it like he should.

Bobby punches at the bad leg to escape but gets shoved off during a superplex attempt. Magnus misses the top rope elbow and gets caught in the Crossface. Just as he’s about to make the rope, Roode pulls him back and puts on an ankle lock with a grapevine for the submission at 23:08.

Rating: B-. This match was more long than good but the idea was right. You can’t have Magnus beat all three guys in a row on a bad leg so the ending was the right call. This came off a bit like Benoit vs. Angle at the 2003 Rumble where Benoit didn’t so much get beat as much as he got caught. Very good showing by Magnus here which is what he needed at this point.

Magnus is mad post match but here’s Sting with something to say. The Brit won’t listen to reason so Sting says let’s go to the back and talk about this. Magnus says no with all due respect because he’s had enough. He says everyone in the Mafia sees something in him but it’s not really there. Sting, Joe and Kurt all passed the challenges given to him but Magnus has failed every time.

Sting tries to calm him down but Magnus says he doesn’t need another pep talk. Magnus says this is a results driven business but he’s not getting the results. Sting talks about needing the one big match and he got it with Ric Flair but Magnus cuts him off. He saw the Flair match with his own eyes and has been watching Sting his whole career. Magnus was one step away from Bound For Glory but now who puts him on the map? Sting says he’ll do it at BFG and they shake hands.

Aries has a present for Hogan too: vegan vitamins. Maybe even a prayer or two would help Hogan make the right decision. Aries talks about Hogan doing the right thing over his entire career and says tonight is all black and white.

Video on Hogan’s history in TNA.

Sabin won’t be at ringside for Velvet’s match tonight because he has to focus on his match at Bound For Glory.

We recap the gauntlet match.

EGO celebrates their win by singing their version of Roode’s theme song. They’re happy because Magnus is off somewhere crying. Also Roode is going to be the first inductee into the EGO Hall of Fame with the ceremony next week. It’s going to be a black tie affair with everyone dressed to the nines. Kaz: “Let’s make it to the tens!”

Brooke Tessmacher vs. Velvet Sky

Winner gets a title shot at BFG. Before the match here’s Lei’D Tapa to destroy Velvet so no match.

We get our first clip of Ethan who appears to be at a Hollywood store shopping but doesn’t seem impressed. We can’t see his face.

We recap Gunner and Storm’s run as tag champions.

Bound for Glory card.

Video on Angle’s career.

Samoa Joe vs. Bully Ray

Joe is apparently one of AJ’s Band of Brothers, because if there’s one thing TNA needs it’s another group. They shove each other around to start with Ray running his mouth too much and getting shoved out of the corner. Joe pounds away in the corner but misses a knee drop, only to put on the standing choke. Ray escapes and grabs the chain, only to have Hebner take it away so Ray can hit the Samoan low.

Back with Ray clotheslining Joe down but missing an elbow drop to give Joe a breather. Joe comes back with a kick to the face and a middle rope kick to the chest for two. The referee gets crushed in the corner as Joe hooks up the Clutch. Ray taps but there’s no referee, so naturally he lets go of the hold. Ray gets the chain around his hand and hits a middle rope ax handle, only to get caught for the DQ at 10:20.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and I have no idea what it was supposed to accomplish. Ray taps out and then loses on a DQ, so what in the world does this do for Bound For Glory? Nothing match here which is the last thing they needed to do for the world title match.

Post match Ray shoves the referee and sends Joe into the announce table. He pulls back the mats for a piledriver on the floor but AJ makes the save and celebrates with the fans.

Here’s Dixie to tell us we don’t know anything about business. Hulk Hogan however does know a little bit about it so please come out here and let’s take care of this. Hogan looks annoyed as Dixie says she can take him to the next level. He thanks her for the watch and talks about always wanting to be part of a power couple in this business. While it’s an amazing offer, he’s quitting. Hogan throws down the mic and walks away, leaving Dixie on her knees begging, because you can’t have Hogan on a wrestling show without worshiping him right?

Overall Rating: C-. This show did a good job of filling out the Bound For Glory card, but as usual there’s WAY too much of a focus on Hogan. Ray vs. Styles got its first bit of development and it lasted about five minutes before we got back to Dixie vs. Hogan for the REAL story. Hogan left but I’ll believe it’s for real when he’s not at Bound For Glory or the Impact taping after. Just like lat year the world title isn’t the focus of the show at all but in this case there isn’t another match to focus on which is making these final shows really dull to sit through. The lack of Aces and 8’s helped a bit though.

Results

Manik/Jeff Hardy b. Chris Sabin/Kenny King – Swanton Bomb to King

EGO b. Magnus – Ankle lock

Samoa Joe b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray hit Joe with a chain

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 26, 2013
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re less than a month away from the biggest show of the year and somehow the top heel is Dixie Carter. Bully Ray is busy with the rejects known as Aces and 8’s while AJ Styles is being called Mr. Marginal by a woman famous for having a husband named Surge and tweeting a lot. But remember, everything is FINE in this company. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual recap of last week’s events.

Dixie Carter arrives and blows Sting off, basically telling him to stay out of her business.

Here are Bully and Brooke to get things going. Bully says it’s not easy to take the words out of his mouth but Dixie did it last week. He’s been up every night wondering how he can beat AJ Styles since AJ won the Series. Now it doesn’t matter though as Dixie is inside AJ’s head. AJ should be kissing the ground Dixie walks on for making him phenomenal. Ray stops to ask if we know who he is and here are the remaining Aces and 8’s.

Knux does the talking and says the same thing he said last week: Ray needs to stop thinking about his ho and start thinking about his bros. Ray says he’s the president and the rest of their patches should just say lackey. They need to fall in line and remember what he did to the former members of this club. Tonight it’s Main Event Mafia vs. the three of them and if an Ace loses, they’re out of the club.

Joseph Park is shaving while singing Sweet Caroline when Eric Young and ODB come in. Eric says Park needs to use a safety razor to prevent the civilians in the back.

Bro Mans/Gail Kim vs. ODB/Eric Young/Joseph Park

This is a result of Robbie getting beaten by both Young and Park in a combined 12 seconds last week. The girls start but it’s off to Robbie vs. Joseph before there’s any contact. Robbie can’t slam Joseph so Park slams him down for one instead. Jesse and Gail slow Joseph down before the Mans send him into the buckle. Jesse hits a good looking dropkick and avoids a seated senton from the big man. Robbie’s middle rope elbow gets two but Park comes back with something resembling a Samoan drop.

The referee misses the hot tag to Eric and it’s Gail in to get in some cheap shots. Back to the guys who are clotheslined down by Joseph, allowing for the hot tag to Eric for some house cleaning. Everything breaks down and ODB sends Gail to the ramp. Robbie pulls back to hit ODB so she shoves his face into her chest. Eric hits a Death Valley Driver on Jesse, setting up a middle rope splash from Park, a top rope elbow from Eric and a splash from ODB for the pin at 6:26.

Rating: D. WAY too long here for the story they were telling as there was nothing going on out there. Park cleaned house, Park got beaten down, Park made the hot tag, ODB breast joke, pin. Somehow that took nearly seven minutes to get through. I’m over the in your face comedy stuff with ODB, Park and Young but they’re clearly not going anywhere.

Austin Aries says he’ll explain his future plans in the ring.

Hulk Hogan says he’ll fix everything.

Here’s Aries with something to say. He says it was just a year ago when he was headlining Bound For Glory and even though he’s not doing that this year, he’s still the main eventer. This brings out…..Kenny King? Kenny says he’s tired of hearing everything Aries is talking about when it was Kenny King making headlines last year when he became X-Division Champion. Then the headlines changed to King being ripped off by Frail Sabin. He was ready to get his belt back but then someone got in the Manik costume and stole the X-Division Title.

That would be Austin Aries, who hasn’t been the future or Generation Next (ROH reference) in about ten years. Now it’s Kenny King’s time but Aries cuts to the chase by saying he’s ready right now. King says that just like Hilary Clinton says before she takes her clothes off, “you don’t want none of this”, before decking Aries. Austin fights him off and says let’s do it right now so here’s a referee. Aries doesn’t wait and dives at King on the ramp to start the match after a break.

Austin Aries vs. Kenny King

Back with Aries pounding away on the floor before heading back inside, only to be taken down by a leg drop and caught with a jumping elbow in the corner. King is busted open BAD, likely off something on the floor. Aries comes back with chops and an atomic drop before rolling over King’s back to set up a release STO. The pendulum elbow but King spins out of the brainbuster. Aries loads up the 450 but King comes back with a super Tazplex for two. Austin shrugs it off and hits the running dropkick and the brainbuster for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: C. This was fine with both guys getting to show off a bit out there. I’m getting curious as to what Aries is going to do at the PPV as he really doesn’t have anything going on right now, though that could be said about a lot of big names. King could be worth something in the X-Division if there was enough competition to fight him.

Lei’D Tapa is coming. It still should have been Ivelisse.

Chris Sabin brags to Austin Aries about being greater than the greatest man that ever lived. Velvet still looks uncomfortable. Sabin and Velvet leaves and Aries says he’d like to test Sabin’s theory.

We recap the end of Ray/Aces and 8’s from earlier.

The Mafia is getting ready but Magnus is frustrated by EGO. Sting tells him to calm down and focus on the bikers tonight.

We get a quick recap of AJ vs. Dixie from last week.

Here’s Hogan to make everything better while also taking a bunch of money and not really improving anything. Hogan talks about being here for about four years now and being GM, meaning he’s in charge of the day to day operations of this show. You never air your dirty laundry in public, and that’s what’s happening with Dixie and AJ. The fans seem to think AJ Styles should stick around and Hogan wants AJ out here to hear that himself. No one comes out so Hogan says we’ll do this later.

Kurt Angle is back at BFG.

Someone named ETHAN is coming.

X-Division Title: Manik vs. Chris Sabin

Manik is defending and gets a quick two off a cross body. Sabin jumps over him in the corner but goes down grabbing his knee. Sabin limps around the ring and leans on Velvet for help, allowing Manik to become the stupidest man in wrestling by falling for it. The distraction lets Sabin pop up to the apron and kick Manik in the face to take over. Back in and Manik jumps over Sabin in the corner before putting on something like a Sharpshooter’s mentally disabled cousin.

A middle rope missile dropkick staggers Chris before Manik busts out kicking combination #6 and a standing flip attack gets two. Velvet’s distraction lets Chris get two off a rollup but Manik catapults Chris into the corner. Back to the same leg lock from earlier from the champion but Chris reaches out for the ropes, only to grab Velvet’s hands. He drags her inside but the distraction lets Manik counter a rollup into a pinning combination for the pin at 5:43.

Rating: C+. I just don’t get the appeal of Manik. He’s fine in the ring and does some nice stuff but I don’t get his popularity. The leg stuff was smart here and it furthered Sabin’s heel turn, but the match wasn’t much better than average. Also, wasn’t Jeff Hardy involved in this feud?

Sabin pounds on Manik until Aries makes the save. Velvet looks shocked at what Chris was doing.

Garrett Bischoff tells Aces and 8’s to keep it together. Knux is ready to go.

Kurt Angle is still back at BFG. That hasn’t changed in the last 20 minutes. Here’s the same video in case you were confused though.

EGO thinks they should be in the Hall of Fame and suggest they should make sure Magnus loses again tonight. Bad Intentions laughs maniacally but Roode just stares at them, refusing to join in. Daniels: “That’s how villains laugh. Come on Bobby.” Roode walks away. Funny stuff.

Main Event Mafia vs. Aces and 8’s

If the Aces lose, whomever loses the fall is gone. Magnus pounds away on Knux to start but Garrett comes in to be suplexed. Knux and Brisco immediately dive in for the save and everything breaks down. Cue EGO to beat up Magnus who is left holding his knee as, making it 3-2 for the time being.

Back with Sting still in trouble and Magnus not on the apron. Knux chokes on Sting a bit and it’s off to Brisco for a chinlock. Sting finally fights up and dropkicks Wes down and there’s the hot tag to Joe as the Aces are all taken down. The backsplash gets two on Brisco and everything breaks down. The Stinger Splash crushes the bikers and there’s the Clutch on Brisco for the submission at 10:07.

Rating: C. The match was ok but it illustrates the problem with the remaining bikers: even with an advantage they were trampled by a pair of former world champions. Why would anyone care if Brisco is gone? He’s done nothing at all and is just another lackey. The match was fine but the conclusion was never in doubt other than which Ace took the fall.

Post match Ray comes out and demands Wes’ cut but he won’t give it up. The fans chant NO, so Bully orders Garrett and Knux to take the cut off of Wes. They hesitate so Ray yells at them and lays out Wes himself with a clothesline and a piledriver. They’re told to take the cut off again or Ray will piledriver Brisco a second time. Knux and Bischoff begrudgingly do what Ray says. Bischoff holds the cut out to Ray but Bully wants Knux to hand it to him. Ray tells Knux to not let the people get in his head before handing him the cut. Knux and Bischoff pick up Brisco….and we need to watch Hogan walking in the back.

Hogan is in the ring to call out AJ with his double theme music. Hogan has a long term contract for AJ to sign but AJ doesn’t look happy. He picks up the pen and finally signs, saying he’s TNA’s. This brings out an overly smiley Dixie Carter who talks about why she signed Hulk. He was brought in to open doors and that’s exactly what he did. She’s very grateful but Hogan is just an employee. Dixie makes fun of AJ Styles’ accent and rips up the contract, telling AJ can get out of his ring.

AJ leaves so Dixie goes on a rant about how no one knows how tough she has it. She knows how tough it is because she’s in the 1% of people that get to make decisions like she does. Yes, they’re seriously going with this story. Hogan now has a week to fall in line and join Team Dixie or else.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show for the most part tonight as the middle of the BFG card is starting to come into focus. The elimination of an Ace is always a good thing as they’ve been around for about a year too long at this point. The Dixie/AJ/Hogan stuff makes me roll my eyes but at this point it’s hard to complain about anything not named Aces and 8’s. Decent, but not great show this week.

Results

ODB/Eric Young/Joseph Park b. Bro Mans/Gail Kim – Splash to Jesse

Austin Aries b. Kenny King – Brainbuster

Manik b. Chris Sabin – Rollup

Main Event Mafia b. Aces and 8’s – Koquina Clutch to Brisco

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Yes I’ve done it again, this time with the first in a series Monday Nitro reviews.  Volume I covers everything from the first episode through the end of 1996, which includes a lot of awesome moments and matches.  These shows feature a long series of Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit matches, a bunch of world title matches and changes, the New Japan invasion, the debut of Chris Jericho, the Alliance to End Hulkamania, the reformation of the Four Horsemen, and of course the rise of the NWO in their dominance of WCW.

This was one of the most important times in wrestling history as the way wrestling was presented on television was changed forever.  The days of an hour of squash matches a week were gone and the flagship show was now on Monday nights.  The Monday Night Wars were underway and this show rocked Monday Night Raw to its core.  These shows still hold up today and are well worth checking out.

The book is available from Amazon for just $4 and can be found in America here

In the UK here

And in Canada here

If you live in another country and have an Amazon specific to said country, just search KB’s Nitro and it should be the only result that pops up.

If you don’t have a Kindle, there are completely free apps you can download to any device imaginable which can be found from Amazon here.

Please check it out and I hope you enjoy it.

KB