Impact Wrestling
Date: December 22, 2016
Host: Josh Matthews

This is a special show as it’s the Best of 2016. That means a lot of copying and pasting from me as I’m not about to rewatch a lot of these matches, especially when they’re likely going to be clipped to death. I’ll be posting the full versions of the matches instead of whatever hacked up versions that air on the broadcast, assuming we get more than just a few clips. Let’s get to it.

We open with about two minutes of the main event of Slammiversary 2016 with Lashley winning the World Title from Drew Galloway, five minutes of Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards from Impact, July 21 and four minutes of Lashley vs. James Storm from August 11. Lashley won all three matches.

Now we’ll go to January 5 for a few seconds of Kurt Angle’s retirement speech. Angle wants to go out on a high note, including a match against Drew Galloway.

Here’s a clip from that match, which aired on January 12. Angle won by submission and again we only get about a minute and a half.

On March 1, Angle beat Bobby Roode. I know it sounds like I’m flying through this but it’s really just the beginning and ending of each match. We’re twenty minutes into the show and we’ve covered five matches with a commercial in the middle.

On March 8, Angle gave his farewell speech where he talked about how much better of a person he is because of TNA.

On March 15, Drew Galloway cashed in his Feast or Fired briefcase to win the World Title from Matt Hardy in 18 seconds.

On March 28, Drew defended the title against Jeff Hardy. This actually gets more than two minutes so I’ll throw in the full match.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy is challenging and gets a headlock takeover out of the corner to take over early. Drew comes back with an overhead belly to belly and Hardy is already in trouble. The champ is sent outside for a dive from Hardy and we take a break. Back with Jeff getting two off a Twist of Fate but taking too much time going up and getting superplexed down.

The Claymore gets two and they head up top for what looked to be a super powerslam from Drew but Jeff reverses into something like a hiptoss. That looked to be a bit botched but it was good enough. Another Twist and the Swanton get two on Drew so Jeff sends it outside and puts Drew on the steps. The Swanton hits knees though and it’s a quick Futureshock to give Drew the pin at 14:18.

Rating: B-. Another pretty good main event here with Jeff being a good first victory for Drew, but they certainly didn’t hit a special level. It’s good that they’re getting Jeff out of the way early though as he’s one of those guys who is always going to be near the top of the roster so thankfully Drew can focus on someone new.

On April 5, Drew successfully defended the title against Matt Hardy.

We get the full Gail Kim Hall of Fame video. Somehow they STILL have the error in there about her holding the title for five reigns (when it was produced) for 232 days. In reality the fifth reign alone was 232 days and she’s held the title over 700 days combined.

We see some of her acceptance speech and about 45 seconds of her winning the Knockouts Title for s sixth time at Bound For Glory.

Since giving them their own show next week (and last week), it’s time to look at the Hardys. We’ll start with Matt vs. Ethan Carter III at Lockdown with Matt defending the World Title.

TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Hardy

Hardy is defending. Ethan draws a line on the mat and it’s time to slug it out. Matt’s chops don’t have much effect but Ethan’s splash hits the cage. It’s time for a chair with Matt getting in some good shots, only to have the Twist of Fate broken up as Matt is sent head first into the chair in the corner. Another Twist is broken up so Matt settles for the Side Effect and a two count.

The champ grabs a chain but walks into a TK3 (TKO) to give Ethan a chance. Tyrus blocks the way so Ethan flips him off, drawing the big man in. Ethan runs the ropes and has a free chance to get out but opts to clothesline Tyrus instead. A Big Ending drops Carter but he’s still able to reverse an attempt at being chained to the cage. Instead it’s Tyrus being chained up but Matt grabs a Twist of Fate for two.

Carter is back up in time to pull Matt off the cage to put both guys down. Matt is up first and hits a low blow, setting up a Twist of Fate with Ethan’s neck in a chair. Of course that’s not enough to finish it so Ethan kicks Matt low to even things up. A slow double crawl towards the door draws out Reby with a hammer but Spud comes out for the save. Then, in the swerve that isn’t a swerve, Spud slams the door on Carter’s head to turn heel and help Matt get out to retain at 11:39.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but it’s ANOTHER heel turn as Matt has to get another minion because he’s this iconic power or whatever line TNA is pushing this week. I do however like the fact that Spud didn’t just align with Carter again because Ethan turned. That’s some nice continuity, but sweet goodness I’m tired of these big heel turns when there are already about four faces on the roster as it is.

With no transition from normal Matt to Broken Matt, here’s the Final Deletion.

Next up, it’s the Great War from Bound For Glory.

Now we look at some debuts, including Mike Bennett/Maria, Aron Rex, Moose, Cody and Brandi Rhodes. We see clips of Bennett defeating Ethan Carter III and the fairly bad mixed tag with Cody/Rhodes vs. Mike/Maria.

Off to the tag teams now as we see Decay beat Beer Money to win the Tag Team Titles on April 26.

We’ll keep up the Decay theme as Rosemary beats Jade to win the vacant Knockouts Title on December 1.

Due to Lashley vacating the X-Division Title, there was an Ultimate X gauntlet held on September 1 and we actually see a good chunk of it.

X-Division Title: Trevor Lee vs. DJZ vs. Andrew Everett vs. Mandrews vs. Braxton Sutter vs. Rockstar Spud

The title is vacant coming in and this is a gauntlet match, meaning people are added at fixed intervals but you can pull the title down at any time. Trevor Lee and DJZ start things off and they slug it out for a bit before pulling each other down. Andrew Everett is in third and the time intervals seem to be two and a half minutes. DJZ gets double teamed so the Helms Dynasty (minus Helms showing up lately) goes up at the same time.

A knee to DJZ’s head knocks him silly but here’s Mandrews to break up the title grab attempt. Mandrews gets thrown off the top though and we take a break. Back with a replay package of what we saw before the commercial instead of what we missed. Braxton Sutter entered during the break and here’s Rockstar Spud to complete the field but it’s still too early to get the title with Sutter making the save.

We hit the big streak of dives before people get back in, only to be thrown out or knocked down seconds later. There’s nothing to talk about here as it’s just one move or spot after another with nothing in between. Spud uses a chair to knock Sutter off the cables but it’s the Helms Dynasty going up and grabbing the title at at the same time. No one comes down with it though so DJZ springboards in and pulls the title down to win at 16:23.

Rating: C+. I’m sure this is the revitalization that the X-Division has been needing for years now and that this will be different than the other half dozen times they’ve promised it’s not going to be left by the wayside again. The same problems they always have still apply here: no characters, no storylines other than they all want the title and get thrown together into one match and nothing we haven’t seen before. Fix some of those things and give us an actual story and the division might go somewhere.

On October 6, Lashley chose Eddie Edwards for a World Title shot and we’re graced with the last eight seconds.

We wrap it up with clips from Lashley vs. Edwards II on November 3. I’ll throw this one in even though we get less than a third of the match.

TNA World Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley

Lashley is challenging. We get the Big Match Intros with JB calling this the super fight. I’ll give TNA this: they do a solid job of making the big matches feel important. Or maybe it’s that JB is really good at his job(s). The bell rings after the break (thank goodness) and Lashley throws the champ around before elbowing him in the face.

They head outside with Eddie chopping him up against the barricade but getting dropped throat first across the steel. Some choking with a wristband takes us to the last break. Back with Lashley in full control with a chinlock and a knee to the face. The champ fights back and sends Lashley outside for a suicide dive.

A Shining Wizard gets two on Lashley, who comes right back with a Dominator for the same. They head outside for a few moments before Eddie misses a top rope double stomp. Lashley pulls the referee in the way and then hits the spear for two, earning the second referee a right hand to the face. The first referee goes to call for the DQ but the Boston Knee Party gives Eddie the fast counted pin at 18:53.

Rating: B. This was more long than good and really illustrated the problem with a lot of TNA: I like Eddie but he’s really just a person who happens to be champion. Lashley is a big dragon for Eddie to slay and that’s what he’s done twice now. I don’t feel any connection to either of them and it’s much more like I’m just on the outside watching something happen.

Overall Rating: D. TNA just managed to screw up a Best Of show. Based off this, I have almost no idea what’s going on in TNA but I know I need a chart to keep track of it all. This felt like taking a guided tour in a bus that was driving 80 miles an hour with the guide shouting various things you can see.

We didn’t see a single match in full and most of the clips showed the opening and the last few seconds. I’d much rather see some full matches (or promos) than cover so much stuff and get nothing out of it. Also, did we really need the Hardys section when two out of three FULL SHOWS will be about them? I can’t even be surprised by this but it was somehow one of the worst executed things TNA has done all year. Just air a Top Ten list or something like that instead of trying to cram in every single thing into two hours. Total mess here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 15, 2016
Location: Hardy Compound, Cameron, North Carolina
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

I knew it would come. Tonight is Total Nonstop Deletion, meaning the entire show is taking place at the Hardy Compound in North Carolina. The big draw for the show is Tag Team Apocalypto with teams from “throughout time and space” showing up for one huge match with the Tag Team Titles on the line. There have been next to no spoilers leaked for this so I’m coming in blind. Let’s get to it.

Senor Benjamin tells us that we shouldn’t try this at home. In Spanish of course.

No drones were harmed in the making of this presentation.

We go to Gilbert Corsey (former OVW interviewer) who says there is seismic activity in Cameron, North Carolina.

At the scene of the Hardy volcano, Itchweeed (yes I spelled that right) runs up to the volcano with a weed whacker and shouts a lot of unintelligible words.

We go to the Dome of Deletion, a mini arena set up with a live crowd, a ring and an entrance shaped like Matt’s open mouth. The Hardys come out with Matt promising fifty of his followers appearing tonight. If they don’t prove their greatness tonight, the Seven Deities will remove the powers of deletion.

Cue Rockstar Spud to say he’s sick of all this, including King Maxel. The infant gets a chant so Spud wants to be his first opponent because the kid hasn’t had a match yet and he’s more over than Spud has ever been. Spud promises to stretch Maxel and make him a loser like his father. Matt actually sanctions the match and makes it No DQ.

King Maxel vs. Rockstar Spud

Maxel drives to the ring in a mini Mercedes because of course he does. The bell rings, Benjamin tases Spud and Maxel gets the pin in 19 seconds. Cool moment, though Kevin Owens basically did the same thing in PWG a few years back.

Disco Inferno is watching from the back and asks if anyone wants to play some poker. It should be noted that Inferno was once arrested for involvement in an illegal poker game.

The news anchor and reporter talk about how the city has been locked down. Shane Helms and the Helms Dynasty roll up in a truck because they’re local roughnecks and ready to fight.

The Rock N Roll Express arrived earlier today. They are PERFECT for something like this and it wouldn’t have felt right if they weren’t around. Matt offers them green beans or meat and invites them inside.

Corsey is taking bets on the match.

Sienna names herself #1 contender for the Knockouts Title and is willing to put that spot up against anyone or anything. Then the following happens.

Sienna vs. Vanguard I

Actually never mind as the referee won’t let this happen so Vanguard I is ejected. We have a replacement though.

Sienna vs. ODB

ODB starts fast and runs Sienna over, setting up a Bronco Buster. A middle rope Thesz press gets two and Sienna is rather disgusted. The referee gets bumped so there’s no count when ODB knocks a chair into her face. Vanguard I comes out to count (with the numbers appearing over his (His?) head) until the referee pulls him out. The Silencer puts ODB away at 4:15.

Rating: D. I’ve never been a fan of ODB but I’ll take her over Grado in some intergender non-comedy. They had to do something like this because you can’t just have some big mess all night long. Some actual wrestling has to take place and if it just has to be ODB, so be it I guess.

ODB rubs Vanguard I on her chest.

The Helms Dynasty wants to fight but Matt has a pre-mo-nition. Tonight, we will see an appalling reincarnation.

If you order ANYTHING off ShopTNA.com, you get a free download of Dixie Carter’s new song. So they’re literally just giving it away. That’s probably the only way anyone would take it.

Itchweed vs. Chet Sterling

This is under House Hardy Rules and the announcers aren’t sure what that means. The announcers talk about how the land will be destroyed if the Hardys lose Apocalypto as Itchweed puts on a sleeper….and falls asleep himself. Itchweeed is up at seven and puts Sterling through a table. The Pesticide Elbow finishes Sterling off at 3:33.

Rating: D. This is another good example of what happens when you let the Hardys loose without their medication. Itchweeed is one of those characters who isn’t really funny but I’m sure it means something to Jeff. Where else is he going to get to do some nonsense like this?

We get a flashback to Matt talking to a giraffe named George Washington and Jeff boxing a kangaroo named Smoking Joe.

TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards

Lashley is challenging and shoulders the champ in the corner to start. They head outside with Lashley shoving a fan, causing the audience (who might be the 50 followers Matt was referring to earlier) to hold him back so Eddie can snap off some chops. We take a break and come back with Eddie grabbing a neckbreaker. Lashley sends him face first into the buckle with some Snake Eyes before cranking on the ribs. Fans: “YOU CAN’T BEAT HIM!” Except for the time he did of course.

Eddie saves himself from a superplex and scores with a missile dropkick. The Shining Wizard gets two but Lashley gets in the Dominator for the same. Back to the floor with a powerbomb sending Eddie into the crowd. Looked cool but not much pain involved. Lashley picks things up a bit and spears Eddie through the wall as we take a second break.

Back again with the warnings that opened the show. Edwards and Lashley have fought into the woods and the match keeps going….but we don’t have cameras. I guess we’ll come back to that later.

Tag Team Titles: Tag Team Apocalypto

The Hardys are defending and this is under elimination rules with eliminations coming via pinfall or submission. The match starts in the arena so we get to see who is in at the start. Here’s the lineup:

Hardys, Helms Dynasty, Rock N Roll Express, Decay

That’s it for now as smoke fills the arena and everyone has to evacuate the building. We see Lashley and Edwards still fighting before cutting back to the teams. Everything goes insane and the teams are outside with firework guns. Abyss: “NO! NOT AGAIN!” The fireworks going into the air and Helms tells his boys to get out. Matt appears in the back of their truck and attacks Lee so Jeff tells the referee to get on the back of his motorcycle to chase after them.

A bunch of teams are at the entrance to the Compound and Decay lets them in because this is going to be beautiful. Matt throws Everett into the Cameron City Limits sign for two (yes there are counts in this) with Helms making the save. It’s a huge fight as some of the teams get in, though none of them are introduced. Crazzy Steve snaps one of their necks for a pin on someone never identified.

Another team is allowed in as Spud is shown waiting on his partner. The Bravado Brothers (Harlem and Lance) show up as the Dynasty and Hardys fight in front of an antique store. Where did the Express go? Back at the entrance, a team called the Ugly Ducklings (maybe) enter and are eliminated in just a few seconds via Abyss’ chokeslam.

The Hardys and Dynasty keep fighting as Abyss beats up a team called Showtime. The Bravado Brothers sneak in as Showtime is quickly dispatched by way or a rock to the head. I’m almost certain we’re not supposed to know who any of those teams were though it’s not like we got a good shot at almost any of their faces. Spud’s partner finally arrives and we take a break.

Back with Spud’s partner being revealed as……Hornswoggle. Decay lets them pass so we cut back to the brawl taking place by the Lake of Reincarnation. A jumping knee to Jeff’s face gets two as Matt makes the save by moving the boat with his mind. The Dynasty starts stomping on the boat until Jeff makes the save with a double noggin knocker.

Matt shoves Helms into the Lake and it’s time for a 3 Count reunion, by which I mean Shane being part of 3 Count and yelling that Everett and Lee are no Evan Karagias and Shannon Moore. They superkick Helms into the Lake as the Bravados show up to roll them up for two each. The Express are in another ring (four sided this time) nearby and call the Hardys in for a fight.

This goes as well as it’s going to go in 2016 but now we cut back to Edwards and Lashley because that’s still going. Wait now it’s back to the Dynasty vs. the Bravados with the referee coming out of a portable toilet to do his job. Everett hits a standing moonsault onto I believe Lance, leaving Harlem to be sent into a wall. They head inside the arena to keep brawling as we cut back to the other ring. Ricky and Jeff are in the kind of machines used to get people to the top of telephone poles and it’s time for another break.

Back with the cranes coming together so Ricky can work on the arm. The volcano is going off in the background as Robert works on a spinning toehold. Matt grabs one of the crane’s controls to send Morton flying through the air. We go back to the other arena where Everett is covered for two. We’re back to the cranes though with Jeff Swantoning out and missing Robert, only to have Matt hit a Twist of Fate to get rid of the Express.

So I believe we’re down to Decay, Spud/Hornswoggle, the Bravados and the Dynasty, assuming no one else arrives. Back in the other arena, Spud and Hornswoggle go after the two downed teams with Hornswoggle swinging a chair. Spud eliminates the Bravados but gets powerbombed by Hornswoggle, setting up the Tadpole Splash. Everett pins Spud to get rid of another team.

Back to Lashley choking Edwards with a cord of some kind as Morton is still stuck on the crane, demanding to be let down. Road Warrior Animal of all people is here, asking how Morton got stuck up there. Decay finds James Storm in a mask but multiple other DCC members show up. One of them takes off his mask and Storm has no idea who it is. Whoever it is gets knocked out with Abyss getting the pin, which eliminates the entire DCC. Storm gets in a superkick for good measure. Steve wants to go add to this pile of bones and we take another break.

We come back again with the Hardys and Decay fighting near the volcano and Lashley and Edwards fighting nearby. The volcano erupts violently and we’ve got the Hurricane rising from the Lake. That means it’s time for breaking news with Corsey saying Cameron’s fate is in the Hardys’ hands.

Back to the outside ring with Decay and the Dynasty each picking a Hardy to beat on. Matt is taken to a graveyard of Hardy logos as Jeff fights back on Decay. Janice is brought in and Jeff’s comeback is cut off by a low blow. Vanguard I comes in and that means another fireworks war. Abyss takes one to the eye and Vanguard celebrates.

To the other teams as Hurricane saves Matt from a shovel to the head. Apparently the Dynasty is broken and a double pin (Can Hurricane do that?) gets rid of Everett and Lee. Matt and Hurricane bury them, which Matt says would make even the man with three H’s proud. Lashley throws Eddie onto the house’s porch and then no sells a Hornswoggle spear.

Abyss is back up but a huge Hardy symbol catches on fire around him. A lot of brawling ends with Abyss taking Matt back into the ring. Matt gets Janice though and a shot to the ribs (with some quick edits) means Matt can make his weird noises. Steve and Jeff fight near the volcano with a Twisting Stunner sending Steve into the mouth. A big explosion sends Steve’s charred body flying into the ring so Matt can get the pin to retain at 44:10.

Rating: N/A. You think I have any idea hot to rate this? As I’ve said many times, I rate wrestling, not a bunch of people running around a big field with a few wrestling rings involved. I know there’s an audience for this and I was excited about what it might be, but you knew they were over hyping this to death.

All that talk about teams breaking contracts and such to show up turned out to be the nonsense that it was expected to be, leaving us with a joke like the Rock N Roll Express, an indy team in the Bravados, Spud and Hornswoggle as another joke (I think?) and three TNA teams. Oh and the jobbers. Don’t forget the jobbers.

No one really bought that any WWE names were going to show up here and the match was a big mess of standing around waiting for the bigger names to show up. The big moment here (I guess) was the Hurricane return and that’s really nothing special. If you knew you weren’t going to be able to get anyone here (Young Bucks? Maybe?), don’t hype it up like it’s a done deal. No they never said it, but if it’s nothing outlandish, mentioning a name in wrestling means THEY’RE GOING TO SHOW UP.

I was really, really disappointed in this as I bought into the hype of the whole thing. But, of course, TNA manages to let me down and thinks that I’m going to be entertained by a joke about HHH burying people when the Hardys (combined age of 81) just beat almost the entire tag team division in less than an hour. There was no big moment, there was no big surprise and there was no big difference between this and the rest of the Hardy specials.

Reby reveals that she’s pregnant to end the show, meaning the World Title match ends without a finish at 1:11:17.

Rating: C-. This is for the World Title match, which actually did something before it turned into a bunch of cameos. Lashley vs. Edwards has been done so many times now that it’s really hard to care about it anymore, especially when we’re waiting on the conclusion to Carter vs. Edwards. Hey, maybe we can have a triple threat! That would be something new!

Overall Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t do it for me. Basically they took a few camera crews and told the Hardys to do whatever they wanted. In other words, it’s a big Hardys special and if you don’t like it, you’re just not up to their level. This wasn’t really interesting and, much like the rest of their big matches, didn’t add anything new. We’ve seen the Lake of Reincarnation done to death and the fireworks look cool but don’t add much.

What we really saw tonight was how limited TNA is. If the best they can do is bring in the Bravado Brothers and Hornswoggle plus a few old guys who will probably do anything for a payday, you really can see their limited influence. On December 2, Ring of Honor brought in the Hardys, Jushin Thunder Liger and some big named from England. Tonight, it was some big names from the 80s who haven’t been on the big stage in years. Which of those do you think is more impressive?

Overall, this felt like a big way to give Matt and Jeff whatever they want. We’ve seen the Broken gimmick for so long now and while Matt’s acting and quirks are still entertaining, they need to either do something fresh with this or wind it down already. The show and big match kept my attention but by the end I was getting tired of it. It’s AMAZING production work as the camera cuts were all solid but it’s a case of not knowing when to say that’s enough, which has been one of TNA’s biggest issues for years.

I get why a lot of people will like it though and this isn’t a case where I’m going to really harp on how wrong they are for thinking that way. It really is a situation where you either get it or you don’t and I think I fall into the latter. There were entertaining moments but that’s not enough for a two hour show. Much like back in the Immortal days, if you don’t like this one idea, you’re better off not watching. That’s a really risky way to run TV and TNA does it far too often.

Results

King Maxel b. Rockstar Spud – Spud was shocked with a taser

Sienna b. ODB – Silencer

Itchweeed b. Chet Sterling – Pesticide Elbow

Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley went to a no contest

The Hardys won Tag Team Apocalypto last eliminating Decay

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 8, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s the last regular show of the year as next week will be Total Nonstop Deletion because it’s a good idea to give the Hardys their own show. The big story this week is the World Title on the line as Eddie Edwards defends against Ethan Carter III. You can almost guarantee a screwy finish of some kind as TNA loves leaving us hanging. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the World Title match with both guys seeming to have a lot of respect for each other.

Here’s new Grand Champion Moose for an opening chat. We get the YOU DESERVE IT chant, which is really starting to lose meaning. The guy has been around less than six months and has only been wrestling on the big stage for less than two years. Anyway, Moose promises to be a fighting champion but here’s Drew Galloway to interrupt.

Drew says the title was built for him and now he could have a match of the year against someone like Moose. The fight is about to begin but here’s Aron Rex (now clean shaven) to interrupt. Rex says three seconds isn’t enough time for a match and threatens to sue the fans for, and I feel stupid for saying this, Rexual Harassment. He’ll have his rematch right now.

Grand Championship: Moose vs. Aron Rex

Rex is challenging and wastes no time with the loaded up punch, which knocks Moose out on the floor. Back in and Rex can only get two so we hit the chinlock. Moose makes a quick comeback to end the round but Rex still takes the first. Rex uses his evil towel to blind Moose to start the second and it’s ANOTHER chinlock. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two on the champ and more elbows give Rex the second round. Round three begins with Rex hammering away again, only to get dropkicked off the top. The Game Changer retains the title at 7:36 total.

Rating: D+. I really cannot stand this gimmick. It’s TNA trying to be creative and while it’s something new, that doesn’t mean it’s interesting. The problem here is you could take away the rounds and the match would be exactly the same. Just have Rex cheat to win any regular title and it’s the same thing. That’s a major problem but TNA just keeps running with this thing.

Eddie says he’s ready.

Galloway rants about TNA not holding the tournament for him.

Aiden O’Shea vs. Mandrews

O’Shea goes for a slam but the much smaller Mandrews falls on him to take over. Aiden’s big forearm hits the apron by mistake and now he’s ticked off. The shirt comes off and the slow beating begins, only to have Mandrews send him outside. That means a big flip dive as I’m wondering why I’m supposed to boo this guy. A springboard seated senton sets up a shooting star press to end O’Shea at 5:48.

Rating: C-. So……he’s one of the least interesting wrestlers in the division, he’s turned heel, and now he wins a match that by definition is about making someone look like a face? Normally I would attribute this to a weird taping situation where Mandrews’ turn was taped after this but, since it’s TNA, it’s just weird booking as this took place after the turn.

Mahabali Shera/Al Snow vs. Tribunal

Indian strap match, meaning they’re bound at the wrists by straps and you win by touching all six corners. They brawl on the floor to start until the wrists are strapped, meaning the Tribunal can start choking. Snow’s comeback is cut off but it’s too early to touch the buckles. Low blows and straps to the back have the Tribunal down and a double low bridging allows Snow and Shera to win at 5:19.

Rating: D-. Whatever man. I’ve been sick of this feud since the second it began and this isn’t getting any better. Hopefully this blows it off and we can go on to anything else because I have no idea why it would keep going. No one involved is interesting and no one involved is being elevated but it keeps going anyway. Such is life in TNA.

We see Matt Hardy asleep with the Seven Deities telling him about something called Apocalypto.

Ethan is ready for the title match and makes fun of Eli Drake for not being able to talk.

Here are the Hardys to talk about Tag Team Apocalypto next week. Matt says the match will be so big that Mc-Mahon or Hayman couldn’t promote it. There will be regular stars of the Impact Wrestling roster and even King Maxill will make his debut. The Tag Team Titles will be on the line in an open challenge to any tag team in the history of space and time.

Cue Shane Helms (He still works here?) to say he’ll be there. Matt can’t wait to see 3 Count or the superheroes back in action. Helms is actually bringing the Helms Dynasty and promises to be there. Cue Decay to say they’ll top the Great War when they appear as well. Helms takes a Twist of Fate.

After a break, DCC says they’ll be in North Carolina next week too.

Laurel Van Ness vs. Allie

Madison Rayne is on commentary. Before the match, Maria laughs at Allie for pretending to be a wrestler. Allie says she’s been training with Braxton Sutter, which freaks Laurel out. Sutter comes out to watch from ringside as Laurel starts beating Allie up. Allie gets in a suplex as Sutter and Mike Bennett fight to the back. With the men gone, Laurel misses a charge in the corner and a reverse DDT puts her away at 5:11.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing but the story was all it needed to be. Allie is one of the most over people on the roster and seeing her beat up Maria and company is the best idea possible. It’s also very helpful that she’s a trained wrestler so we don’t have to sit through months of her learning how to do things. Sutter vs. Bennett could be good too.

Maria tries to get in and is shoved right back down.

Video on Carter vs. Edwards.

Allie is all happy and kisses Sutter in celebration.

Total Nonstop Deletion ad.

TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Eddie Edwards

Eddie is defending and they trade armbars to start. A running knee lift cuts Eddie off and sends him to the floor as they’re definitely taking their time here. Ethan gets two off a knee drop and we take a break. Back with Carter getting two off a suplex and we’re off to a chinlock.

That goes nowhere so Eddie hits a top rope hurricanrana to very little reaction from the audience. They chop it out until Ethan is knocked outside for the suicide dive. Eddie’s rollup is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two but the TK3 doesn’t work. Back up and the champ gets crotched on the ropes for the superplex into a small package near fall.

Carter speeds things up until the Boston Knee Party sends him outside. The TK3 connects on the floor but Carter still can’t put him away. The Backpack Stunner is countered into Ethan’s rear naked choke, only to have Eddie roll onto his back. It’s a double finish as Eddie taps at the same time as the three count at 20:35.

Rating: B. The match was good but, as usual, it felt like they were just doing moves until we got to the ending. The near falls helped a lot and I buy them as equals but the ending felt a bit forced. It’s a good main event but really not enough to save the show, which wasn’t the best leading up to this.

The match is ruled a no contest so Eddie retains. Replays show that Carter’s shoulder was up at two anyway but it’s not acknowledged. I’m guessing Carter goes heel after this.

Overall Rating: C-. That main event helped a lot but there’s almost no way to save this show. Maybe they were just spent at the end of the marathon tapings or maybe TNA just isn’t capable of putting on quality TV (there’s a shocker) but so much of this show feels like a waste of time.

I can’t count how many things on here just exist with no emotional connection. When you have a gimmick match that doesn’t work, a pretty worthless big vs. little match, that stupid, stupid Snow/Shera match and a mostly bad women’s match, a good main event just isn’t enough. The show isn’t the worst in the world and is watchable at times but it’s not interesting and that’s a much bigger problem.

Results

Moose b. Aron Rex – Game Changer

Mandrews b. Aiden O’Shea – Shooting star press

Al Snow/Mahabali Shera b. Tribunal – Snow and Shera touched all six buckles

Allie b. Laurel Van Ness – Reverse DDT

Eddie Edwards vs. Ethan Carter III went to a no contest with a double finish

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 1, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re down to two regular shows left in the year and the big story tonight is the crowning of a new Knockouts Champion as Gail Kim has vacated the belt due to injury. That leaves Jade and Rosemary inside Six Sides of Steel for the title because it’s not like they have any better options at the moment. Let’s get to it.

We open with a DCC video as they’re focusing on the Hardys. Matt is back to help his brother tonight thanks to a well placed bolt of lightning.

Grand Championship: Aron Rex vs. Moose

Rex is defending in an open challenge. Rex: “NO! HIT GRADO’S MUSIC!” We have to wait a minute though as Rex wants to do his warmups. That’s followed by a trip to the floor for a cartwheel from the champ. Back in and Rex rakes the eyes to set up the ring punch, only to walk into the Game Changer to give Moose the title at 1:45.

Moose says he’ll defend against anyone. Rex on the other hand has nothing to say but seems to be crying.

Jeff Hardy arrives and doesn’t know which Matt we’ll be seeing tonight. They’ll have a plan in the title match though.

Here’s the DCC to say they don’t want to delete anyone but they want to erase things. Cue Jeff to say the DCC has no idea what they’re getting themselves into. The beatdown is quickly on and….the DCC video comes on again. The lights go out and Matt returns for the save. Deletion is guaranteed.

Go For Broke is ready to fight each other for the X-Division Title. It’s a challenge for DJZ because his friends know him better than anyone else.

X-Division Title: Braxton Sutter vs. Mandrews vs. DJZ

DJZ is defending and this is one fall to a finish after Go For Broke won last week’s three way tag. They trade rollups to start in that three way style where it’s clear that this has all been choreographed in the first place. Mandrews suplexes the champ down and gets two off a standing moonsault. Another moonsault off the steps takes down Sutter and DJZ but it’s time for the “fun” part with the skateboard.

DJZ elbows him in the face but tweaks his knee back inside. That goes nowhere as DJZ high crossbodies both challengers, only to have Sutter snap off a Flatliner. Mandrews uses a twisting Stunner to get out of a suplex but as soon as he hits the shooting star, DJZ pops back up with a rollup to retain at 5:58.

Rating: C. Another meaningless X-Division match with the whole “we just know each other so well” idea going nowhere. The lack of story continues to destroy this division, but some of that has to do with Mandrews being really uninteresting. Yeah he can do shooting stars and moonsaults. That’s nowhere near enough to make him a complete character but you take what you can get around here.

They pose together but Mandrews goes heel by kicking DJZ’s bad knee out. Mandrews is the least interesting of the three but this is in fact better than nothing.

Laurel Van Ness says that she can make Braxton feel better but Allie wonders why she never sees Laurel and Braxton together.

Here are Maria and Laurel to vent some frustration. Maria gets right to the point by calling Allie out and demanding an apology. Allie is sorry she hit Maria with a pumpkin pie but Maria wants to talk about Allie costing her the title at Bound For Glory. It’s because Allie believes in honesty so Laurel goes on about what she did with Braxton last night. Maria calls Allie stupid and gets slapped in the face, making this the third time Allie has stood up to her. Laurel beats Allie down and AGAIN we haven’t really done anything new in this story.

Rosemary is ready for the cage match.

Tag Team Titles: DCC vs. Hardys

Bram and Kingston are challenging and the champs take over early on with a pair of double suplexes. Things settle down with Bram getting beaten up in the corner, followed by a chinlock from Jeff. You don’t often see that from a face but TNA has never been your normal promotion. Double Poetry in Motion gets two on Bram and we take a break. Back with the DCC working over Matt in the corner until Bram charges into a boot.

The hot tag brings in Jeff but Storm hits him with a belt, meaning the heel beatdown starts up again. Kingston grabs a chinlock and runs Jeff over with a shoulder as this just keeps going. Bram spins out of the Twist of Fate and a double clothesline puts both guys down. The real hot tag brings Matt back in and it’s time to bite Kingston’s arm and hand. Bram breaks up the Twist of Fate so Kingston takes it instead, allowing Matt to retain the titles at 15:54.

Rating: C+. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: the Hardys are great when they’re out in their own universe but they’re just boring in the ring. Both guys look old and tired in their matches but at least they’re trying. The bigger story here though is the DCC losing already, which makes me think that it’s yet another stable that isn’t going to live up to its potential because TNA would rather push Matt and Jeff even more.

We recap Gail Kim being attacked, forcing her to vacate the title. If she wasn’t hurt during the Bound For Glory match, I really don’t know of a reason why she needed to get the title at the pay per view.

Ethan Carter III mocks Eli Drake for not being able to talk. When Ethan gets the title back next week, all Eli has to do is say the word and he can have a shot.

Al Snow gives a really intense speech about giving the Tribunal what they have coming to them. This is one of the best things on the show but again, WHY SHOULD I CARE ABOUT AL SNOW???

Ethan Carter III comes to the ring and has some words for World Champion Eddie Edwards. This brings out the champ to see him face to face with Ethan talking about how much that title changes people. Carter has failed to capture the title twice this year but he won’t fail a third time. Eddie knows the kind of man Carter is but Ethan says that when a title is involved, his mindset is kill em all and let God sort it out. Well that intensified quickly.

Knockouts Title: Rosemary vs. Jade

Inside Six Sides of Steel with the title vacant coming in and Madison Rayne on commentary. Oh and Gail Kim is outside because we just need her presence. You can only win by pinfall or submission so Rosemary knocks Jade to the floor right after the bell. Rosemary throws a trashcan inside but gets knocked down as we take a break.

Back with Rosemary sending Jade into the cage and yelling at Gail for selecting Jade as the future of the division. Jade is thrown into the cage wall again but comes back with a top rope hurricanrana for her first real offense. A powerbomb gets two on Rosemary but let’s stop for a second so Madison can praise Gail some more. Rosemary is thrown off the top rope so Jade climbs to the top of the cage (Madison: “SHADES OF GAIL KIM! 2006!”) for a high crossbody. It’s only good for a delayed two but the yellow mist blinds Jade. An F5 makes Rosemary champion at 14:42.

Rating: C-. Yeah I know we have a new champion. That’s great and all, but can we get a little more about Gail Kim? I mean, how does she feel about this? Did you know she’s the first Knockout in the Hall of Fame? Or that Rosemary basically beat her because Gail picked Jade as the next face of the division? Rosemary winning is the best option as someone else can rise up to beat her but you’re almost crazy if you don’t think Gail is a top contender for that honor.

Rosemary laughs at Gail to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was better this week but the focus on the older talent is getting old. Gail Kim was the focus of the main event, Al Snow got a big promo and the Hardys are about to get their own special. The World Title match next week got a little focus but the rest of the card just doesn’t do much for me right now. At least the wrestling was better though and that’s a positive step for TNA.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 24, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s a holiday show and that means a lot of things could happen. In this case we’re also going to bear witness to Matt Hardy’s Ice Cream Social because this show is whatever the Hardys come up with to be all zany. As far as wrestling goes, we’ve got Ethan Carter III vs. Eli Drake with title shot vs. Drake being allowed to talk on the line. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the DCC attacking and defeating Eddie Edwards and Jeff Hardy last week.

Here’s Jeff to open things up in the arena. Jeff says today is all about family and while he’s not at home, the Creatures are still his family. As much as Jeff wants to jog Matt’s memory, he needs to deal with the DCC right now. Cue the DCC on screen to say they’re many, and can destroy the obsolete later tonight in a No DQ match. The unmasked men come to the ring but Jeff gets in a few shots and bails like a wise man.

At the Hardy Compound, Senor Benjamin is reading an adult magazine and Vanguard I is drinking lemonade. Matt goes off to set up for the Ice Cream Social and Vanguard I is worried that Matt will never get his memories back.

Andrew Everett/Trevor Lee/Marshe Rockett vs. Go For Broke vs. Rockstar Spud/Decay

Elimination rules meaning all three have to be eliminated (And NO, this isn’t TNA using a WWE idea. I need to stop being a WWE fanboy and shut up and enjoy this amazing concept!) and non-title since there isn’t a title for this Team X Gold thing. Mandrews, Steve and Lee start things off with the Brit cleaning house.

Spud comes in and gets slammed by six different people without an ejection because the rules are only enforced when it’s convenient. Abyss even gets in a slam on Spud because well why not. A missile dropkick puts Abyss down but Mandrews’ followup doesn’t work quite so well as he crashes to the floor. Abyss hits him with a chair and that’s a DQ. Oh wait it’s an EJECTION instead of a DQ. Ignore the whole rules being broken because apparently DQ’s have been replaced by ejections.

Mandrews taps out to a crossface chickenwing a few seconds later and Josh goes on a limb suggesting that the team with three members is in control at the moment. Everett moonsaults onto Steve for an elimination, only to get caught in the DJZ for an elimination almost immediately thereafter. So it’s DJZ/Sutter vs. Lee/Rockett vs. Spud. Sutter’s Flatliner gets rid of Lee but Spud and Rockett get in an argument over who gets to beat up DJZ. Unfortunately Spud realizes he has no partners left so it’s a kick to Spud’s face and a Rock Bottom for the elimination. Another Flatliner gives Sutter the final pin at 8:07.

Rating: D+. This is one of the dumbest concepts TNA has ever had and that’s saying a lot. There’s no structure, the rules make little sense (Hitting someone with a chair in front of the referee is a DQ. Stop trying to make this more complicated than it is.) and one team has completely dominated the whole thing. I really don’t get what they’re going for here but it’s falling really, really flat.

Allie is playing with dolls and talking about Thanksgiving when Maria and Laurel Van Ness come in. They rip on Allie for being stupid and Maria says Allie will be serving them dinner on their double date. Are we just supposed to forget Allie standing up to Maria a few weeks ago?

Matt says his food will make Robert Irvine’s cooking obsolete, sending Vanguard I a shot of hope. The first guest, a referee, comes up and has some tapes to show Matt.

It’s time for Thanksgiving dinner with Allie dressed as a Pilgrim. She doesn’t want Braxton Sutter to see her like this so guess who Laurel’s date is (Braxton has apparently taken the fastest shower in wrestling history as he looks fine here). Laurel and Mike Bennett say what they’re thankful for and Maria yells at Allie for trying to speak. Van Ness hits on Braxton and Allie finally snaps, calling Laurel a big meanie (Is there any wonder why she’s the most over person on the roster?). Maria gets pied and that’s about it. There was a chance for a followup there but since it’s TNA, we just go to the next segment.

Carter and Drake are ready for their main event tonight.

Matt looks at clips of becoming World Champion and can’t believe he was that violent. Reby doesn’t know what to do now.

Ethan Carter III vs. Eli Drake

Title shot vs. being able to speak for the rest of the year. They start brawling on the floor for a bit until Carter hits a dropkick inside to take over. Drake slowly pounds away but gets clotheslined right back to the floor as we take a break. Back with Drake being sent into the steps but he snaps Ethan’s throat over the top. We hit the chinlock for a bit, followed by a powerslam for two on Ethan.

With nothing else to do, Drake grabs a microphone and talks trash while stomping away. He slaps Carter in the face a few times but gets caught in the TK3. The 1%er is countered into a torture rack neckbreaker but Carter comes right back with a frog splash for the same. Blunt Force Trauma gets two for Eli and the 1%er gets the same. The rear naked choke makes Drake tap at 16:04.

Rating: B-. Not bad here as Drake continues to look good, though I have no idea where this rear naked choke came from. Carter just started using it a few weeks ago and now it’s some devastating finisher. Drake not being able to talk could be rather entertaining but I could go for him winning a big match for a change.

The Hardys hypnotize Matt to fix him. Well that’s underwhelming. Another snap of the hypnotist’s fingers turns Matt back into his one true self, meaning the one who doesn’t like wrestling.

Al Snow/Mahabali Shera vs. Tribunal

Snow and Baraka start things off with Basile yelling about the old man. The trapping headbutts have Snow in control and it’s off to Shera for the dancing. Thankfully that doesn’t last long and it’s back to Snow, who gets caught in the wrong corner. That only lasts a little while as well before it’s off to Shera for the Sky High and another near fall. Everything breaks down and the Snow Plow is broken up, leaving Baraka to hit Snow with a foreign object for the DQ at 6:34.

Rating: D-. THIS FEUD IS SO BORING! I can only imagine this feud is to appease the Sony Six audience as Shera is little more than a goon while Snow is a role that could be played by anyone else. It doesn’t help that this story has been going on and off for the better part of six months now with almost no advancement.

Grado and Robbie E. are put in a turkey suit match to bring back a tradition.

Grado vs. Robbie E.

They slug it out to start with Grado getting the better of it off the snap jabs. A double clothesline puts both guys down as this is a little less funny than I was expecting. Robbie grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:39.

Aiden O’Shea comes out to make Grado put on the suit and dancing ensues. Total waste of time here but at least it wasn’t Al Snow and the Tribunal.

Rosemary is ready for her cage match next week.

Jeff Hardy vs. Bram

Anything goes. Jeff knocks him to the floor to start and hits a dive, only to have to back off from the DCC. Back with Bram charging into boots in the corner but Storm comes in, which makes perfect sense. Well save for him waiting five minutes to interfere that is. Jeff makes another comeback but has to deal with Storm while Bram goes outside for a chair. The Whisper in the Wind gets rid of Storm and the Twisting Stunner gets two on Bram. A quick Last Call knocks Jeff into the Brighter Side of Suffering for the pin at 11:56.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. This was much more storytelling than a match as Jeff needs backup to help him fight off the odds (Where was Eddie Edwards tonight?), preferably in the form of his brother. There wasn’t much to this one and that’s fine enough, especially when it’s a story instead of a big match.

The DCC poses with the titles.

Reby is at her wits’ end with Matt but he just can’t remember what’s going on. Matt storms out of the house freaking out and asks the seven deities to send him a sign. He is then hit by a bolt of lightning, which turns him back into Broke Matt.

Overall Rating: D. Same problems as usual for TNA here: too much Hardy (though his normal self was making me chuckle) and a horrible lower card dragging down the good things this promotion does. Team X Gold gets more annoying every single time as there’s almost no consistency, let alone a point, to the whole thing. It also doesn’t help that TNA doesn’t really have anything to build towards since they only have Impact at the moment. I’ve seen worse episodes, but this wasn’t very good.

Results

Go For Broke b. Decay/Rockstar Spud and Marshe Rockett/Trevor Lee/Andrew Everett – Flatliner to Rockett

Ethan Carter III b. Eli Drake – Rear naked choke

Al Snow/Mahabali Shera b. Tribunal when Baraka used a foreign object

Robbie E. b. Grado – Rollup

Bram b. Jeff Hardy – Brighter Side of Suffering

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 17, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

The big story coming out of last week’s show is the unmasking of the DCC, which revealed James Storm, Bram and the yet to be named Eddie Kingston to be behind the recent attacks. The group has targeted Eddie Edwards and the Hardys, meaning we might be seeing the some combination of the three fighting the DCC tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s show ending beatdown.

Here’s Eddie Edwards for an opening chat. Eddie is a nice guy but he knows he has a target on his back. He’ll get right to it: he’s not leaving this ring until he gets to fight a member of the DCC. Cue all three of them though and the beatdown is quickly on with Eddie Kingston finally being officially referred to as…..Kingston. Jeff Hardy comes out for the save and cleans house.

After a break, Eddie and Jeff go in to see the boss (meaning Billy Corgan, who isn’t named here) but Aiden O’Shea won’t allow the cameras follow them in.

Jesse Godderz vs. Aron Rex

Non-title and pinfall or submission only, making this a glorified street fight. Jesse doesn’t waste any time and knocks Rex straight into the corner before trying an early Adonis Lock. That earns him a rake to the eyes and a chinlock because Rex is the kind of heel who uses a chinlock two minutes into a match. Rex takes it outside and sends Jesse into the barricade, followed by yet another chinlock. That steams Jesse’s hair so he sends Aron outside and then hammers away back inside. The Adonis Lock makes Rex tap at 7:53.

Rating: D+. The story here is solid enough but that really doesn’t make it interesting, which is mainly due to Rex. He won a title in a competition that didn’t work well in the first place and now he’s a heel just because, which puts him in a feud that keeps going against Godderz. Not terrible here but I have no interest in watching these two again.

Laurel Van Ness is texting Braxton Sutter, much to Allie’s annoyance. Maria comes up and laughs at Allie for thinking Brandi Rhodes wants to be her partner.

Due to the attack last week, Gail Kim is forced to vacate the Knockouts Title.

Hardy and Edwards get to face the DCC in an anything goes handicap match tonight.

Sienna/Laurel Van Ness vs. Brandi Rhodes/???

The villains seem to be called the Lady Squad. Better than Ladyballs I guess. Maria laughs at the idea that no one wants to be Brandi’s partner but Rhodes has a surprise: Madison Rayne. Madison and Sienna get things going with some forearms putting Sienna in trouble. It only takes some choking to get her back in control though, followed by Laurel choking with her boot in the corner.

A snap suplex gets two for Laurel but a missed charge allows Madison to make the hot tag to Brandi. Unfortunately that leaves Brandi to clean house and she’s just not ready to do that. Madison and Laurel fight outside and a bad looking Downward Spiral puts Sienna away at 6:01.

Rating: D. Brandi is in a weird place here as she’s being pushed as a big deal but just isn’t capable of hanging at that level in the ring yet. That being said, she’s had all of three matches and there’s definitely a natural charisma there. I don’t know if she’ll be in the ring long term but she’s trying. Unfortunately she’s trying on a stage she’s not ready for yet and that’s making things look bad.

Matt Hardy, still sane, doesn’t understand why he would give the trick or treaters green beans. Reby tells him to go back to the Impact Zone to save his brother but Matt would rather delete e-mails, including the Young Bucks newsletter. He mentions unsubscribing and the Scribe appears….but only Matt can see him. Reby wants him to get help.

Trevor Lee vs. Ethan Carter III vs. Lashley vs. Mike Bennett

One fall to a finish, no tags and the winner gets a title shot at some point in the future. It’s a big brawl to start with Lashley getting the better of it by suplexing Bennett and throwing Lee over the down and down onto Ethan. Back from a break with Trevor getting in some kicks to everyone’s face as Josh plugs the Wolf Creek season finale. Bennett and Lee seem to form a quick alliance but as is so often the case, it breaks down as soon as one of them wants the pin.

The fans want someone to kill the troll as Carter takes some shoulders in the corner. Ethan comes right back and loads up a double 1%er, only to get speared in half by Lashley. A cutter drops Lashley and a deadlift German suplex gives Lee two on Carter. Bennett starts snapping off superkicks and spinebusters, only to have Lashley give him the real spinebuster. Lee suplexes Lashley to block the spear (sweet counter) and dives over the top to take out Carter and Lashley. Back in and Carter grabs a sleeper to make Lee tap at 14:07.

Rating: C+. This was getting fun but at the same time it’s getting a bit tiresome to have Lashley and Carter rotating into the #1 contenders spot over and over and over. You know they’re going to get their title shots at some point so just let them have it later and try someone else in those spots for a change.

Reby and Matt look at some Broken Matt videos and Matt is terrified of the chaos.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake asking Ethan to come out here and be his guest. Drake gets right to the point: he wants one more match with Carter with that title shot on the line. Ethan wisely says no but Drake sweetens the pot by saying he won’t challenge for the title for one year if he loses. That’s not cool with Ethan, who wants people like Eli chasing him near the top of the ladder. However, he also wants one more fight with Drake so let’s do it next week. If Drake wins, he gets the title shot but if he loses, he can’t speak for the rest of the year. That’s good enough for Drake and the deal is made.

Decay threatens Jade with destruction at the hands of Rosemary.

Basile Baraka vs. Mahabali Shera

This feud just won’t go away. Baraka takes him down and chokes with the boot as Josh goes into a way over the top plug for a new sitcom at Pop. Shera gets tired of the trash talk and gets in a powerslam but a camel clutch is countered into a rollup for two. Another slam sets up another camel clutch to make Baraka tap at 4:05.

Rating: D. Why is this still a thing? I know they need to fill in time but is this really the best they have? Or is Shera just there to keep the Sony Six people happy? Neither guy is interesting and the Tribunal, which could have been at least something, has turned into one of the least interesting acts in a long time.

Post match the Tribunal beats Shera down until Al Snow makes the save. Josh: “AL SNOW IS TRENDING WORLDWIDE ON TWITTER RIGHT NOW!” Does Josh know that trending on Twitter is a real thing and not just a random statement? Snow and Shera shake hands, which Josh calls the Mega Powers uniting. He might be the greatest troll announcer ever and I doubt he has any idea of it.

Rosemary is creepy to Jade and it’s announced that their Knockouts Title match will be inside a cage.

Eddie Edwards/Jeff Hardy vs. DCC

Handicap match and anything goes. Jeff is just normal Jeff Hardy here and gets in an early Twist of Fate on Bram. It’s too early for the Swanton though as the rest of the DCC pulls Bram outside, leaving Jeff to dive on all three of them. Eddie gets in a few shots on Storm as we take a break. Back with the DCC in control until Jeff hits Storm in the back with a few chair shots. Kingston is sent through two open chairs in the ring but Bram comes in for the save. The Brighter Side of Suffering through a table plants Edwards, allowing Storm to superkick Jeff for the pin at 13:43.

Rating: C. Not bad here but, as is always the case, TNA doesn’t know how to wait on something. It’s fairly clear that Matt is going to be the big savior for TNA and the six man will result in Final Deletion XIX or so. That should be entertaining, but would it kill TNA to wait a little longer before doing these big matches?

Overall Rating: C-. Impact really is cut in half at this point as the top half of the show is going really well but there’s such a big gap further down the card. It’s kind of hard to go from a “dream” tag team vs. the TNA Wyatts to Snow/Shera vs. the Tribunal. I’m having a little more fun watching Impact lately but, as usual, I have no reason to believe it’s going to last.

Results

Jesse Godderz b. Aron Rex – Adonis Lock

Brandi Rhodes/Madison Rayne b. Sienna/Laurel Van Ness – Downward Spiral to Sienna

Ethan Carter III b. Lashley, Trevor Lee and Mike Bennett – Sleeper to Lee

Mahabali Shera b. Basile Baraka – Camel clutch

DCC b. Eddie Edwards/Jeff Hardy – Last Call to Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 10, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s another big night here in TNA as the World Title is on the line again. This time it’s Eli Drake challenging as he cashes in his Bound for Gold title shot for a chance at Eddie Edwards’ World Title. Other than that we’ll likely get an update on Broken Matt Hardy, who might have amnesia. Let’s get to it.

We look back at last week’s main event.

Josh previews the show, which will feature the start of some competition to crown a new #1 contender.

Here’s Eddie to open the show. Over his career, he’s had a lot of support but there’s also been a lot of negativity. He’s developed a never say die attitude and is ready for anything, but here’s Drake to interrupt. Drake is Bound For Gold and is ready to lighten Eddie’s load a bit. This brings out Ethan Carter III to say he’ll be #1 contender no matter what. He can see it in Eli’s eyes: Drake isn’t ready to be champion. Now it’s Mike Bennett and Maria coming out to laugh at Ethan for betting on Eddie, just like when he bet and lost his streak. The fight is on but here’s Moose to join in as we take a break.

Mike Bennett vs. Moose

This is the first in a series of qualifying matches for a #1 contenders match. Moose throws him around to start so Maria pulls her husband to the floor, earning an ejection, followed by a lot of screaming. Back in and a chop block slows Moose down and we slow down into a standard “keep the power guy on the mat” match. Moose makes his comeback with headbutts to the arm but can’t do his running charge into the corner.

Instead it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb and a backsplash (becoming WAY too common a move in wrestling) for two, only to have Bennett kick out the leg again. A piledriver gets two because piledrivers are only devastating sometimes. The Game Changer is broken up with even more superkicks but Bennett no sells a pump kick, setting up a cutter for two. They head outside with Moose going head first into the steps, drawing a countout to give Bennett the win at 8:32.

Rating: D+. Standard Bennett match here, meaning nothing all that interesting. I’m glad they didn’t have Moose lose clean here and Bennett is more interesting going forward towards the title, especially if Lashley is involved in this competition. You don’t need two big power guys in the same match so Bennett going forward makes more sense.

Al Snow is here for a surprise from the Tribunal.

We go to the Hardy Compound where Jeff shows up to check on his brother. Apparently Matt has been acting differently since his injury, including wearing sweaters and showing an interest in home improvement. That means building a dining room, but he doesn’t recognize Jeff at the moment. Jeff tries to impersonate Broken Matt, who doesn’t even remember that they’re wrestlers. He’s an engineer now but Reby has an idea.

Here’s the Tribunal for a statement. They quickly bring Snow out and get right to the point: they don’t need him and never did. The beatdown is on and it’s Mahabali Shera for the save. The Tribunal easily beats up the dancer and stand tall.

Jesse Godderz wants to get his hands on Aron Rex and it’s not about the title.

Abyss vs. Ethan Carter III

Qualifying match. Carter misses an early charge but has to fight out of a chokeslam attempt. Abyss takes it outside and chokeslams Ethan onto the apron (which the announcers don’t point out as the hardest part of the ring). Back in and a hard shot to the face drops Carter again before a comeback is cut off by a chokeslam for two. A chair doesn’t work and Ethan grabs a sleeper for a tap out (Huh?) at 6:36.

Rating: D. A sleeper for a submission? I guess it was supposed to be a rear naked choke but when the announcers call it a sleeper, that’s what I’m going with. Maybe Carter couldn’t get him in the 1%er or something but that’s quite the weird ending. At least we had a fresh match for a change and that’s a good thing.

Eli is ready to take the title.

Back to the Hardy Compound where Reby plays the theme song while Matt eats lobster. A family sing-a-long breaks out but Matt has no idea what to do. To be fair they ask him to remember Jeff’s line. Jeff offers to take him on a ride on the dirtbike. Jeff: “ISN’T THAT EXCITING???” Matt: “No.”

JB is in the ring to bring out Gail Kim, who has an announcement. Gail comes out and says Borash is like family to him. Interesting but not much of an announcement. She asks Jade to come out here and calls Jade the future of the division. Gail sounds like she’s about to retire when Rosemary and Decay cut her off. It’s mist for Gail and Jade gets dropped, leaving Rosemary to choke Gail out. Rosemary isn’t done as she goes coast to coast to drive a garbage can into Jade’s face.

Trevor Lee vs. Rockstar Spud vs. DJZ

Thankfully it’s not a title match but rather another qualifying match. It’s a chase to start with Lee kicking DJZ in the chest but Spud can’t get a cover. Back in Lee throws DJZ around again but gets knocked outside, leaving Spud to take out DJZ’s leg. A springboard legdrop gets two but Lee muscles Spud up and sends him flying with a release German suplex. Spud comes back in for a low blow on DJZ but gets kneed in the face. The fishmerman’s buster gives Lee the pin on Spud at 4:22.

Rating: C-. This was every X-Division match you’ve seen in the last few years and there was no mention of the champion losing or of Lee earning a potential future title shot after winning a match involving the champ. At least DJZ didn’t lose though and he still has that stupid flag to carry around in Team X Gold which doesn’t actually involve gold.

Aiden O’Shea puts Grado and Robbie E. together as a team against Lashley. The happiness quickly ends.

Brandi Rhodes tries to give Allie a pep talk to no avail.

Lashley vs. Grado/Robbie E.

Qualifying match and the team doesn’t get an entrance. Tags are required here as Josh tries to say the team should be favored. Robbie is driven into the corner to start before it’s off to Grado for a top rope ax handle. Robbie’s middle rope clothesline actually puts Lashley down and Grado does his dancing punches. A double suplex just seems to tick Lashley off and it’s time to get serious. Grado’s spine is busted and the spear ends Robbie at 2:56.

We look back at Rex defending the title last week and knocking Godderz out with one punch.

Rex arrives while polishing the belt. Jesse is waiting on him (Rex: “Someone had too much Creatine.”) and we go to a break. Back with Rex saying he’s not interested in this and getting beaten up anyway. The beating continues until Rex gets back into the car and leaves.

Back to the Hardy Compound where Matt is terrified to be on the bike. They go to the lake where Matt is very confused about the idea of talking to a boat. Matt on what’s going on in his head: “It’s just so hard to describe!” Cue the Scribe to confuse Matt even more. Jeff suggests getting in the water but Matt says it’s freezing. Matt won’t do it so Jeff says he’ll go fight by himself. As his brother leaves, Matt suggests counseling.

TNA World Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Eli Drake

Drake is challenging and we get Big Match Intros. Feeling out process to start until Drake takes over with a hard clothesline. The champ gets beaten down a few more times and a powerslam gets two. Eddie’s comeback sees him throw Drake over the top but a little skinning the cat….doesn’t work as Drake is clotheslined out to the floor.

The suicide dive is overshot as Eddie crashes into the crowd and Drake comes up holding his arm. Back in and a quick Blunt Force Trauma gets two, followed by a quick belly to back suplex for the same. Not that it matters as the Boston Knee Party is enough for the pin to retain the title at 10:21.

Rating: C. The best thing about this match is the time. There’s no reason whatsoever for Eddie to need more than about ten minutes to dispatch Drake and that’s what happened here. Drake is similar to the Miz: mainly talk, but he’s so good at it that he can hang above his in ring levels. This gets rid of Bound For Gold but Drake did well enough that he could be back here someday.

Post match here’s the DCC to go after Eddie. The champ is laid out and the masks come off to reveal someone unnamed (Eddie Kingston), Bram and James Storm, the latter of whom seems to be the leader.

Overall Rating: C-. The show was fine enough but as usual there’s almost nothing to get connected to. Everything in TNA (save for the Hardys) is always so structured with people winning a tournament or a competition or something like that to get a title shot. You never have someone get over on sheer popularity and become a contender because everything has to be earned. I like the sentiment and it’s good for a change but as usual, it’s not a good idea to have everything be the same. I need more emotion and something to connect to as most of the time I’m just watching things happen instead of getting interested in them.

Results

Mike Bennett b. Moose via countout

Ethan Carter III b. Abyss – Sleeper

Trevor Lee b. Rockstar Spud and DJZ – Fisherman’s buster to Spud

Lashley b. Robbie E./Grado – Spear to Robbie

Eddie Edwards b. Eli Drake – Boston Knee Party

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 3, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s a big show this week as we’ve got three title matches, including the TNA World Title being defended as Lashley challenges Eddie Edwards to get his title back. Lashley has another problem though as he attacked Cody to end last week’s show, which might come back to haunt him tonight. Let’s get to it.

We recap Lashley vs. Edwards, including Eddie winning the title and Lashley’s path to becoming #1 contender again.

Here’s Brandi Rhodes to open the show and talk about some of the decisions she and Cody have had to make in three years of marriage. Cody was attacked last week but Lashley can rest assured that he’ll be back. Cue Maria and Sienna to interrupt and ask if Brandi is going to stick around or run home and take care of her husband.

Maria says she gives people opportunities but sometimes she slams doors in their faces, like she did with Allie. She sees something in Brandi though and that’s why she wants to help. Brandi says the Rhodes name means something and she doesn’t need help from anyone. Sienna gets in her face and a fight breaks out with Sienna taking over without much effort. The AK-47 leaves Brandi laying.

Video on Eddie Edwards’ childhood and family.

Grand Championship: Aron Rex vs. Jesse Godderz

Rex is defending. Josh wonders if there are big rings under the tape on Rex’s fingers. I’m sure there’s no way to, I don’t know, CHECK THEM BEFORE THE MATCH but wrestling referees are stupid by definition. Jesse takes over to start and goes for the Adonis Lock but gets spun away.

Josh goes into analyst mode to ask Pope who he has for the first two minutes. A crossbody gets two on Aron and it’s off to an armbar (a beautiful one according to Josh). Godderz’s Fujiwara armbar takes us to the end of round one, which goes to Jesse. Rex snapmares him down and grabs a chinlock to start round two.

Back up and Rex gets rolled up for two before headbutting Jesse into the corner. A slow motion powerslam gets two on Rex but the round ends as the Adonis Lock goes on. Round two goes to Godderz and we take a break before round three. Back with Rex getting punched in the face as Jesse would be smart to waste time. The champ rakes the eyes though and a big right hand retains the title at 12:24.

Rating: D. I still can’t stand this concept and this didn’t do anything to help the problem. The first round is usually both guys going slowly, then a second round of only a step faster and then they do the finish in the third round. Let it be a ten minute time limit or whatever but this was tiresome when they were already in the tournament. Rex as the cheating heel is a slight upgrade but it’s not enough to fix things.

Video on Team X Gold, another unnecessary concept. Team Go For Broke respects each other.

Marshe Rockett/Trevor Lee/Andrew Everett vs. Rockstar Spud/Decay vs. Go For Broke

This is probably 75% of the division (if not more) in one match. There are three men in the ring at a time and Josh confirms that yes, the flag is the bragging rights trophy. Lee, DJZ and Steve start things off but instead of explaining the match, let’s hear about a sale at TNA’s website.

Double teaming DJZ doesn’t do much good as he takes the other two down with a dropkick and flip dive to the floor. Mandrews comes in for a double stomp to Steve but gets buckle bombed by Lee. Spud and Rockett get the tag and the big Marshe intimidates him into a tag off to Abyss. Clotheslines and shoulders don’t put anyone down but Mandrews springboards in with a dropkick to both guys.

Sutter comes in to clean house but Abyss starts chokeslamming people. One such chokeslam puts Steve onto Sutter….and that’s an ejection for Decay, leaving Spud on his own. Wait so there are elimination rules? Shouldn’t that be a DQ for the whole team? Not that it matters as Sutter gives Spud a Flatliner for the pin at 5:19.

Rating: D. There’s no story to the matches, the prize is a flag, Go For Broke has cleaned out the entire division in about a month and the rules aren’t clear but the announcers have to plug everything else instead of explaining anything. This comes off as the latest waste of time that TNA has come up with and gets to call brilliant despite it being nothing but flips and chaos for five minutes.

Video on Eddie winning the X-Division Title.

Tag Team Titles: Hardys vs. DCC

The Hardys are defending and the DCC now appear in the ring after their freaky video. The Hardys get beaten down but the DCC walk away without the bell ever ringing. Jeff says it’s not time to punch the clock because the Hardys still want to fight. That means we get a bell and a referee (Shouldn’t he have been down there for the scheduled match?) and it’s a big wild brawl. Josh says this is the strangest thing he’s ever seen and actually says he’s seen Delete or Decay and the Great War. I repeat my often stated opinion: Josh Matthews is a stupid, stupid man.

Things settle down with Matt getting double teamed by the two masked men, who I’ll call Porkchop and Cash for lack of anything better. Porkchop gets his mask bitten and something like a headlock neckbreaker allows the tag off to Jeff. Cash has to break up the Twist of Fate but a double clothesline allows Jeff to Twist Porkchop. The third one (Toaster Oven) comes in for the DQ at 2:40.

The five head to the back with a score playing over their fight. They actually interrupt a Grado interview and Grado stops to ask Jeff for a picture…..which Jeff actually grants in a funny moment. Jeff is in trouble so Matt throws the magic water on him and it’s Immortal Jeff, who burns a cigarette on Porkchop.

Matt commandeers a forklift to chase Cash as Porkchop puts Jeff in a case, along with the water bucket. That makes the regular Jeff (as regular as he gets) come out with a Twisting Stunner. Matt takes Cash’s mask off to reveal another mask, only to have Matt get kicked off the forklift for a huge crash. Jeff goes to check on his brother…..and Matt has amnesia.

Ethan Carter III (because transitions mean NOTHING in TNA) is going to call out Eli Drake.

Here’s Ethan in the ring and Drake comes out shortly thereafter. After turning down Ethan’s challenge, Drake says he earned everything he’s gotten around here and Ethan has been handed everything instead. That sends Ethan onto one of his traditionally great rants about how he’s earned the right to be called the man around here. Eli brings up Bound For Gold so Ethan suggests the title shot against Ethan’s right to ever challenge for a shot again. Drake says next week….is his title shot because he’s cashing in, which leaves Ethan “Midcarder” III right where he’s always been.

Lashley says he’s ready and Eddie has no idea what’s coming.

Video on Eddie losing the X-Division Title to Lashley and losing his mentor right around the same time. Then he won the World Title and now believes anything is possible.

TNA World Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley

Lashley is challenging. We get the Big Match Intros with JB calling this the super fight. I’ll give TNA this: they do a solid job of making the big matches feel important. Or maybe it’s that JB is really good at his job(s). The bell rings after the break (thank goodness) and Lashley throws the champ around before elbowing him in the face.

They head outside with Eddie chopping him up against the barricade but getting dropped throat first across the steel. Some choking with a wristband takes us to the last break. Back with Lashley in full control with a chinlock and a knee to the face. The champ fights back and sends Lashley outside for a suicide dive.

A Shining Wizard gets two on Lashley, who comes right back with a Dominator for the same. They head outside for a few moments before Eddie misses a top rope double stomp. Lashley pulls the referee in the way and then hits the spear for two, earning the second referee a right hand to the face. The first referee goes to call for the DQ but the Boston Knee Party gives Eddie the fast counted pin at 18:53.

Rating: B. This was more long than good and really illustrated the problem with a lot of TNA: I like Eddie but he’s really just a person who happens to be champion. Lashley is a big dragon for Eddie to slay and that’s what he’s done twice now. I don’t feel any connection to either of them and it’s much more like I’m just on the outside watching something happen.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event almost bails this out but there’s just so much bad stuff earlier on. The new divisions (if you can call them that) need to be cut off almost immediately as they’re going nowhere and have a very limited direction (though they do have a flag). Other than that it was the usual Hardy insanity, Maria being all evil and a good Carter vs. Drake segment. The problem boils down to how little there is to care about on most of this show as too much of the material ranges from boring to nonsensical. There’s some good on here but it’s few and far between more often than not.

Results

Aron Rex b. Jesse Godderz – Right hand

Go For Broke b. Marshe Rockett/Trevor Lee/Andrew Everett and Rockstar Spud/Decay – Flatliner to Spud

Hardys b. DCC via DQ when the third DCC member interfered

Eddie Edwards b. Lashley – Boston Knee Party

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

And the spin is AMAZING.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/tna-loses-uk-tv-deal/

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 27, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s an interesting time in Impact Wrestling and that’s excluding all of the court shenanigans going on at the moment. The big story at the moment is Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards over the TNA World Title but in addition to that we have the mixed feud between Cody and Brandi Rhodes vs. Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis-Bennett. Let’s get to it.

We open at the Hardy Compound where Senor Benjamin and Vanguard I have prepared a corn maze. The humans go their separate ways and Jeff, wearing sunglasses, says he has lost his family and stops to eat corn, seemingly starving. Matt suddenly has a pre-mo-NEE-tion saying that an outsider will appear tonight and give them a bad message. As for now though, it’s Trick or Delete.

Ethan Carter III/Jesse Godderz vs. Aron Rex/Eli Drake

This was set up during a brawl on Fact of Life last week. Aron works on Jesse’s arm to start as it’s the simple white and pink gear still looks pretty horrible. Jesse and Ethan alternate dropkicks for two on Rex but it’s off to Drake for a breather. That lasts all of five seconds before it’s back to Aron, who has to be saved from the Adonis Lock. A double flapjack plants Drake and we go to a commercial.

Back with Jesse fighting out of a chinlock but getting kneed in the ribs to put him right back down. The beating doesn’t last long though as Jesse dives over for the hot tag to Carter but Rex takes him right down into the corner for some knees to the face. Drake adds in some shoulders and we’re off to the second face in peril segment.

The Russian legsweep and wind-up elbow get two on Carter, who then has to fight out of Drake’s chinlock. They trade sleepers and Carter falls into the corner for the tag to Jesse. An Angle Slam of all things sends Drake flying as everything breaks down again. Rex has something on his hand to rake over Jesse’s face, followed by the Revelator for the pin at 15:18.

Rating: C-. This was more long than good and I’m still not sure why they feel the need to turn Rex heel so quickly. It’s almost like a guy who has been a generic character for years and only made a splash on the main WWE roster with an over the top gimmick isn’t all that interesting as Aron Rex: Guy In Trunks.

We look back at Maria attacking Brandi last week.

Maria is running her mouth when Brandi comes in, sending Maria scampering.

Grado has something planned for Halloween but won’t say it on camera.

Some kids come up to House Hardy so Jeff sings the Obsolete Song and Matt tells them that they’re soldiers in the Great War.

Rockstar Spud teases who he has for his Team X Gold teammates.

Here’s Grado to say he’s been having a great time in Impact Wrestling but wants more. That’s why tonight he wants to bring out one of his inspirations: Robbie E! See, for Halloween, Grado wants to be a BroMan. He heads to the back and comes out in yellow trunks and covered in oil, which gives us the always awesome shocked Robbie face. A lot of dancing ensues but the TNA Wyatts appear and beat them down. Josh says they’re called the DCC as two of them give Grado a spike piledriver.

Earlier today, Aiden O’Shea called Allie over to talk to Billy Corgan. Allie thinks she needs to stand up for herself so Corgan grants her a match with Laurel Van Ness for tonight.

DJZ/Braxton Sutter/Mandrews vs. Rockstar Spud/Decay

This is Team X Gold and Decay are mystery partners. Sutter and company are now called Team Go For Broke and carry a Team X Gold flag, which seems to be the division’s title. Sutter drops Abyss with a flying shoulder and catches Steve in a scoop powerslam. Mandrews comes in and his high levels of suck allows Steve to take over with some ripping at the face. Steve charges into a boot in the corner but Mandrews still can’t dive over for the tag. The second attempt works and it’s off to DJZ as everything breaks down. The ZDT takes care of Spud for the pin at 4:03.

Rating: D+. And they want two divisions going at the same time out of these guys? There’s barely enough time to have DJZ defend his title regularly (When is the last time there was even a real story over that title that doesn’t involve a heavyweight laughing at how worthless it is?) but hey: THEY HAVE A FLAG!

Cody and Brandi call this personal.

Here are Lashley and Eddie Edwards for their contract signing. All contact has been banned and I’m sure that’s going to hold up. Lashley thinks it’s amusing that Eddie got to face Cody last week instead of the inevitable title loss right off the bat while he’s been jumping through hoops.

Lashley gives Eddie a change to get out without signing but Eddie talks about Lashley ducking him and how the rematch is next week. Lashley did take Eddie lightly and he got lucky. This isn’t a movie though and now the lucky guy has to pay. The champ says he’s not backing down and signs but asks Lashley what happens if he loses next week. That’s enough for Lashley and the table is turned over, only to have him sign in peace.

We recap Allie getting beaten down last week.

Laurel Van Ness hits on Sutter, who doesn’t know what to think.

Back to House Hardy where we have the opening of the first Halloween movie (nice touch). The doorbell rings and it’s…..the Hurricane, who has the door slammed in his face. Jeff leaves to put on his costume and comes back as that fast talking insane guy from the Great War, who I don’t believe has a name.

Back from a break with Jeff, in costume, mowing the lawn into his logo.

Laurel Van Ness vs. Allie

Madison Rayne is on commentary again. Laurel drives her into the corner to start and shrugs off a clothesline. They head outside where Laurel misses a charge into the steps to give Allie a chance. Back in and Allie scores off a double leg takedown and some right hands, setting up a rollup for two. Not that it matters as a curb stomp ends Allie at 4:33.

Rating: D. There wasn’t anything to this match but it’s part of a bigger story. I’m sure Allie will get better (she’s a long tenured indy wrestler) and get the win back later so this is fine at the moment. What isn’t fine is Madison, who has a pretty grating voice and is playing this totally straight, meaning it doesn’t really add anything to the match and is more distracting than anything else.

Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump come up to House Hardy. Senor Benjamin tazes Trump and Jeff asks what happened to the e-mails. Matt: “DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!” Ok I chuckled on that one. Jeff shouts about Boo Radley and Vanguard I chases Hilary away.

Godderz comes up to Rex and demands a title shot, which Rex actually grants.

A kid comes up to House Hardy and gives Reby a tape, which is from the DCC. They’re coming for the Hardys and their titles next week.

Mike Bennett and Maria say they have what Cody and Brandi want.

Video on Lashley vs. Edwards.

Mike Bennett/Maria Kanellis-Bennett vs. Cody/Brandi Rhodes

Maria starts and tags out in less than three seconds, meaning the men will really get this going. Cody sends Mike into the corner and Maria slaps him in the face, almost drawing Brandi over for the fight. A cutter gives Mike two and we take a break. Back with Cody fighting out of trouble and slamming Mike down.

Maria is smart enough to sneak around the ring and pull Brandi off the apron though, meaning Mike can get in a running corner clothesline. Mike allows Maria to get in a few cheap shots but she kicks her husband low by mistake. The tag brings in Brandi and it’s time for the catfighting because neither of them are full time wrestlers.

The bad looking offense results in Maria being sent into another low blow on Mike, followed by some kind of choke/half nelson from Brandi (the camera keeps moving around so we never get a clear shot of it). Cody adds a modified reverse Figure Four (I believe Jamie Noble used to call it the Trailer Hitch) for a double submission at 11:20.

Rating: C. This was basically the definitive welcome to the company for Cody and Brandi as the women were really just there as window dressing for the match. There’s nothing wrong with that as they’re not trained wrestlers and can only do so much. In other words, it was smart to let the guys do most of the work here and just give the fans something to cheer for at the end.

Cody and Brandi go to the back but Lashley jumps Cody, leaving Brandi to flail at his back. Lashley, in a weird camera shot where he’s supposed to be looking at Cody but is looking at the camera, says no one comes into his house without his permission to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. As is so often the case with TNA, this was much more about setting up stuff later on instead of doing anything at the moment. The main event felt somewhat important but the big show is next week. It’s pretty much TNA’s version of Backlash and the card looks big, though it’s still nothing all that exciting. This wasn’t much of a show but I’ve seen far worse.

Results

Aron Rex/Eli Drake b. Jesse Godderz/Ethan Carter III – Revelator to Godderz

DJZ/Braxton Sutter/Mandrews b. Rockstar Spud/Decay – ZDT to Spud

Laurel Van Ness b. Allie – Curb stomp

Cody/Brandi Rhodes b. Maria Kanellis-Bennett/Mike Bennett – Double submission

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6