Impact Wrestling – June 17, 2015: Three For The Price Of One

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 17, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’ve got two weeks to go before Slammiversary and it’s time to start building towards the main event of the TV show two weeks from tonight. Yeah the Carter vs. Angle World Title match is going to be held on Impact instead of at the pay per view due to some scheduling issues. That is of course TOTALLY different than TNA being a poorly run company who couldn’t figure out that having a pay per view the day after a TV taping was really, really stupid. Let’s get to it.

We open with a tribute to Dusty Rhodes, who used to be the authority figure here back in the early days.

It’s time for Angle and Carter to sign the contract. In an interesting case, this is coming just after a contract signing closed Ring of Honor. Carter gets to talk first by talking about Angle beating Heartbreak Kids, Texas Rattlesnakes, Dead Men, Immortals, Electrifying Men, Rated R Superstars and some people you can’t even see. He’s also beaten submission machines, phenomenal ones, icons and charismatic enigmas (the first person mentioned actually still with this company. And shouldn’t those all be singular since Angle only beat one each?) but the World Title reigns ends with Carter.

Angle praises Carter, but thinks he’s a disrespectful punk. This time around, Kurt is healthy and ready because he’s been here before. Once Carter loses, it’s going to haunt him for the rest of his life. Both guys sign, but they also get to pick an opponent for each other. Angle gets to go first, and he picks Lashley to face Carter. Not a bad choice. Carter gets to pick next week on a live show.

The X-Division Title will be decided next week. Man just scrap Slammiversary and put on a Barney Miller marathon.

We recap the Tag Team Title series to this point, with the Wolves currently up 2-1.

Here are the Wolves with Davey talking about how they’ve fought around the world to be the best tag team in the world, and that’s what those belts mean. They’ve beaten the BroMans, the Hardys and Team 3D already and now it’s time for the Dirty Heels. Last time the Heels cheated to win, but the Wolves won’t get fooled again. Good line but points off for a WOLVES NATION shirt. Stop just putting a word in front of nation and thinking it sounds good.

Edwards wants to do match four right now, so here’s Roode sans Aries. Austin isn’t here tonight because he’s healing up after last week, so there’s no match. Eddie thinks a singles match is in order and Roode doesn’t think so, but he’ll do it if the winner gets to pick the stipulation for next week. The Wolves are fine and it’s time to go.

Bobby Roode vs. Eddie Edwards

Roode hammers away to start but Eddie kicks him outside for a big suicide dive. Back in and a clothesline gets two for Eddie but he runs into an elbow to the jaw. A Hennig necksnap puts Eddie down again as Roode is a heel this week. It’s good to know as it varies so often. Roode’s chinlock doesn’t go anywhere as Edwards comes back with a leg lariat.

The announcers call last week’s Aries vs. Angle match five stars. At least this time they’re waiting until after the match happened to praise it. There’s a backpack Stunner for two on Roode but he comes back with a spinebuster for the same. Roode tries to bring in a chair but Richards gets on the apron for some reason, earning him a swing from Bobby. The distraction lets Eddie get a rollup pin at 8:22.

Rating: C. This brings up the problem with the entire series: the matches are just ok. They’re not bad or anything, but I barely remember them a few minutes after they happened because they’re just coming and going as we wait for the big match to come for the titles to exist again. The ending made no sense either as the Wolves wound up cheating instead of the Dirty Heel. This story hasn’t been great since it started and it’s losing steam every week.

Davey makes match #4 Full Metal Mayhem. So what’s #5 going to be? Another regular match?

Joseph Park is back, minus his law firm, money or teeth. He’ll face Bram tonight and get to be the guy on top for the first time. So we’re just forgetting that he knows he’s Abyss I guess? Does that mean we’re done with the Revolution too?

We get a ten second video of Drew Galloway talking about how much he loves wrestling.

Bram vs. Joseph Park

Park tries to lecture Bram before the match and gets punched in the face. Bram slugs away but misses a chair shot, allowing Park to get in some shots of his own. Now it’s table and kendo stick time as I guess this is a hardcore match. It was never announced as one but sure why not. Park comes back with some kendo stick shots and a chokeslam for two. Back up and Park misses a spear through the table, allowing Bram to get the pin at 3:53.

Rating: F. A guy as talented as Bram is stuck in the hardcore story because there’s nothing else for him to do right now because they’ve killed off the singles titles other than the World Title and now we’re sitting here watching him against Joseph Park. Bad match here and Bram doesn’t even get to hit his finisher to win? Horrible stuff.

Taryn has a deal for Brooke and Awesome Kong: if they beat the Dolls tonight, they both get a title shot. If they lose, neither can ever have a shot again.

The world is ready to burn and playtime is over. No idea what that is for.

Marti Bell/Jade vs. Brooke/Awesome Kong

Brooke gets jumped in the aisle but here’s Kong for the save. The bell rings and Kong runs Jade over before it’s off to Brooke, who doesn’t have the same luck. Brooke fights off some double teaming but gets thrown right back into the corner as the announcers debate their taste in women. Brooke avoids a charge and spears Jade down, allowing for the tag to Kong. A chokeslam plants Marti and Brooke climbs onto her shoulders for a big elbow and the pin at 6:24.

Rating: D. This wasn’t the worst in the world but good grief Josh is getting on my nerves. Between talking about the number of days the champions have held their titles and calling Dinero the heel commentator, he becomes more of a combination of Cole and Striker every week. Nothing match here as the finish was obvious, though the story wasn’t bad.

We recap the hardcore war which ended with Eric Young choking out Chris Melendez with Chris’ prosthetic leg.

Chris Melendez wants to fight Eric Young right now. This brings Young out to praise Melendez for being an American hero, but Young just doesn’t care. He cares about no one but himself because there’s no reason for Melendez to be in the same ring as Eric Young. Does Chris really want to be here all alone next week? Chris says he’s ready. Young was just a jerk here and not crazy, making him FAR more effective as a heel. Melendez is nothing though.

DJZ vs. Jesse Godderz

Godderz laid DJZ out last week so DJZ charges right at him to start and nails a jawbreaker and middle rope back elbow (love that move). Back up and Jesse slams him down by the arm, setting up a Boston crab for the submission at 1:43.

Post match Godderz cuts a really, REALLY good promo about how he was the BroMans because he was the only one training while Robbie was on a reality TV show and DJZ was in some bar making funny noises. He rants about how Robbie was nothing until he joined the team and now DJZ is nothing either. Jesse gorilla presses him up but Robbie makes his big return and shows more fire than ever before. I’m actually digging this.

We look back at James Storm possibly murdering Mickie James a few weeks back.

Here’s a livid Magnus, two weeks after Mickie was attacked. He isn’t letting this show continue until he gets James Storm out here one on one. Here’s Storm to call Magnus the crazy jealous one for having Mickie followed by cameras. “What do you think was happening when those cameras weren’t there?” Magnus is held back by security but Storm brings out a baby stroller, presumably carrying Mickie and Magnus’ son.

James calls it his insurance policy but walks down the aisle without it. He says Mickie is a sorry excuse for a woman and Magnus is a sorry excuse for a man, which is finally enough to get Magnus past security. Storm kicks the baby stroller off the stage and of course it’s just a doll.

Video on Ethan Carter III.

Ethan Carter III vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley throws him down to start and nails a hard clothesline before just running Carter over. Tyrus finally grabs Lashley’s boot to stop his boss’ pain but Lashley easily suplexes Carter over. Another Tyrus distraction lets Carter get in a dropkick off the apron to take over. The match isn’t bad so far but I can’t take much more of Josh talking about the number of days Carter has been undefeated. Carter slows him down with a chinlock for a bit before having to escape a torture rack.

Lashley scores with a powerslam for two but Tyrus puts a chair in the corner. The spear hits the chair (Earl Hebner has zero issue with this) and Carter gets two off a DDT. The 1%er is countered and the referee goes down (like it matters), right before the spear connects. Cue another referee but Tyrus takes him out and gives Lashley a Big Ending, setting up the third referee to count two, earning him a shot from Tyrus. Lashley spears Tyrus but gets speared down, only to get nailed in the back with a chair, setting up the 1%er to give Carter the pin at 9:26.

Rating: D+. This was straight out of the Russo playbook with two chairs, three ref bumps and interference in less than ten minutes. Angle was nowhere in sight to help even the odds because the script didn’t say he was supposed to and the whole thing was just way too much. It didn’t help that Josh was driving me up the wall with his counting the days of Carter being undefeated. We get it: you’re Michael Cole and Carter is Miz. Pick a better role model.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is on the verge of flying off the rails and you can see a lot of it coming from here. The problem right now is they’re building to three different shows instead of any one in particular. You have next week’s live show with Full Metal Mayhem and the X-Division Title match, Slammiversary (which I don’t think has anything official yet) and then the bell to bell show in two weeks with the World Title match. It doesn’t help that a lot of the midcard just feels like a big waste of time when they could be doing anything else. The show wasn’t horrible but they need to focus on something quick.

Results

Eddie Edwards b. Bobby Roode – Rollup

Bram b. Joseph Park – Pin after a missed spear through a table

Brooke/Awesome Kong b. Jade/Marti Bell – Elbow drop to Bell

Jesse Godderz b. DJZ – Boston crab

Ethan Carter III b. Bobby Lashley – 1%er

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – May 22, 2015 (International Impact): Oh Yeah They Knew

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 22, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

So since Destination America basically threw up a middle finger at TNA on Memorial Day weekend, there was no new episode aired on Friday May 22. However, there was a show airing internationally which has since come online. This is a few weeks old but here it is for the sake of completeness. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Hardys having to vacate the Tag Team Titles due to Jeff breaking his leg in a motocross accident, setting up the best of five series between the Dirty Heels and the Wolves.

D’Angelo Dinero is brought out for commentary. Granted that doesn’t mean much here as the only version I could find was in French.

Mandrews vs. Manik vs. Tigre Uno vs. Crazzy Steve vs. Argos vs. Rockstar Spud

Elimination match with no tags because that’s what the X-Division consists of these days. Spud starts fast and cleans house as Steve sits in the corner holding a monkey. Tigre dives over the top to take Manik out before Steve intentionally dives onto no one. He’s crazy you see. Mandrews sends Argos to the apron for a crash onto everyone, leaving Mandrews to hit a great looking shooting star onto the pile.

Back in and Manik pulls Steve out of the way of another Madrews shooting star (which would have missed by three feet anyway), setting up a rollup to get rid of Mandrews. Steve has silly string and clotheslines Manik in the corner, setting up a Cannonball for two. Wait….now there are tags? After that huge mess and insanity they have tags now??? Argos comes in for more clotheslines to Manik, followed by a reverse Shell Shock from Tigre for two. It’s strange to not hear the commentary as there’s far less to make fun of.

Steve comes back in to rip at Tigre’s mask, earning him a kick to the back of the head. Argos runs back in for a gorilla press gutbuster to eliminate Steve. It’s Argos vs. Spud now with Tigre coming in to double team the Rockstar. Tigre goes up top for a kind of top rope seated senton low blow for two and we take a break. Back with Argos hitting a running hurricanrana on Manik as we see Tigre being eliminated during the break to get us down to three.

Spud dropkicks Manik down and hits the Underdog on Argos for an elimination, leaving Spud vs. Manik. They slug it out with Spud getting the better of it with a bunch of punches and some running forearms. The Underdog is broken up and Manik gets two off his tiger suplex into a gutbuster. The same sequence sees Spud counter the gutbuster into a rollup for a near fall, followed by an Underdog from the apron to the ring for the pin at 15:23.

Rating: C. Well, you had six guys, they did moves to each other for fifteen minutes, and one of them didn’t get pinned. That’s what the X-Division has become: meaningless matches with someone coming out on top and no real reason to care about most of them. Other than Spud, these guys are almost interchangeable as far as levels of interest, so why should I care that he beat all of them?

Long recap of the BroMans rise and eventual split. It’s clear that they’re filling a lot of time.

Jesse arrives (sans shirt of course) and says he beat up Robbie because he’s better. Robbie got on a reality TV show after Jesse did so Robbie should be thanking him for his entire career. Robbie can be the Bro, but Jesse will be the Man.

Spud says that’s one step closer to getting the X-Division Title back. The people are with him, not Kenny King.

Jesse Godderz vs. DJZ

Before the match, Jesse says he’s the superstar and the reason they won the Tag Team Titles. He knows he and Zema are supposed to fight, but it would be the same ending that Robbie E. suffered. Jesse isn’t losing to a nobody. A serious DJZ comes out and says he was the X-Division Champion before the BroMans and Jesse was nothing. That’s enough to start the fight with DJZ hitting a quick running hurricanrana to send Jesse outside. A jawbreaker staggers Jesse (you might even say it stuns him) and it’s all DJZ so far.

Jesse comes back with a great dropkick and slaps on an armbar of all things. That goes as far as an armbar is going to go when your name isn’t Alberto and Jesse hot shots him down. DJZ kicks away what appeared to be a Figure Four and hits a Thesz press, only to get stomped back down. A Boston crab of all things makes DJZ give up.

Rating: D+. Jesse is trying and playing a decent heel, but at the end of the day he’s a pretty boy bodybuilder using a Boston crab as his big finisher. That’s not going to get him very far, but this is better than anything else he’s ever done as a singles guy. Robbie E. coming back for a big showdown could be entertaining though.

Magnus says this is about James Storm.

Video on Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle with Young being…….oh you know it by now.

Video on James Storm manipulating Mickie James for reasons that aren’t clear yet aside from he’s evil. Mickie’s fiance Magnus isn’t cool with this. He’ll be a lot less cool with it when he shoves her onto train tracks.

Magnus comes out for a match but says he has to deal with James Storm messing with his family, plus Storm’s Revolution. A few weeks back, Khoya hit him with a big piece of wood. Maybe that’s overcompensating for a smaller piece of wood?

Magnus vs. Khoya

Magnus stomps him down to start and they head outside with Khoya being sent into the barricade. A suplex gets some two counts and for no apparent reason, Magnus puts the referee on top of Khoya and counts two more. Well of course he does. We take a break and come back with Magnus throwing him outside again as we wait for the screw up so Khoya can take over and Magnus can make the comeback.

Magnus swings Khoya’s stick but hits the post and hurts his hands, allowing Khoya to take over. Ah there it is. Khoya stomps away in the corner and clotheslines Magnus down for no cover. A corner splash misses though and Magnus starts his comeback with clotheslines followed by the top rope elbow. A pair of Spine Shakers end Khoya at 9:39.

Rating: D+. Just an extended squash here which is how you should build towards a match like Storm vs. Magnus. It wasn’t anything interesting and Magnus still isn’t worth watching in the ring, but at least he got a win here to give him some momentum before the Slammiversary match.

Bram says he’s crazy and dangerous and he has no remorse. He’s violent you see and he’s coming for Bobby Roode.

Recap of the Tag Team Title best of five series.

Dollhouse video, focusing on their war with Gail Kim and Awesome Kong. The camera slowly zooming in on Taryn’s face as Kong’s music played was a great touch.

Rebel vs. Marti Belle

Before the match, Marti says it can still be playtime even though Taryn isn’t here. Rebel is offered a chance to leave but she won’t say anything. Finally she calls the Dollhouse the Skank House and slaps Jade in the face to get things going. Marti is knocked into Jade’s arms but a baseball slide puts them both down. Jade gets in some cheap shots as Marti gets a chair because the referee is dumb enough to fall for this.

They finally get inside with Marti in control and clotheslining Rebel down to break up a comeback. Rebel scores with a slam and a headscissors, but instead of turning Marti over she pulls her into the back of the trunks for a “comedy” bit. Another Jade distraction lets Marti hit a double arm neckbreaker for the pin at 3:16.

Rating: D. Nothing special here but it’s nice to see that Marti can work a match to go along with her stable mates. It’s a boring match though, partially due to Rebel being little more than a model who they trained to take some bumps. Dull stuff here as you can see the big divide between the top and bottom tiers of Knockouts.

Kenny King isn’t worried about Rockstar Spud and the X-Division Title.

X-Division Title: Mica vs. Kenny King

Oh so King is champion here. I didn’t actually know coming into this. King bails to start but Mica catches him with some right hands to knock the champ outside. Back in and an armbar slows Mica down but he comes back with a slam for two. Not exactly inspiring stuff so far. Mica’s ram into the buckle is countered with King snapping his throat across the ropes before firing some right hands into the face. A spinning kick to the face gets two on Mica but he comes back with a Samoan drop for two more. That’s it for him though as the Royal Flush retains King’s title at 6:40.

Rating: D+. I just do not care about this feud whether there’s a title involved or not. King is fine as the X-Division Champion but Mica and Drake are so dull and uninteresting that there’s almost no way to care about any of them. The fact that the match was dull made it even worse.

Bobby Roode was the World Champion at wrestling but he’s capable of fighting against someone like Bram.

Campaign ad for Ethan Carter III for World Champion. Him winning the title will bring down unemployment and help with the millennial problem. Unfortunately this is used to set up Carter vs. Anderson’s boring match.

Bobby Roode vs. Bram

Roode is the clear face here despite being half of the Dirty Heels tag team because TNA doesn’t think these things through. Bobby cranks on the arm to start but Bram keeps going to the ropes. After a breather on the floor, Bobby knocks him right back to the floor as they’re in first gear so far. Back from a break with the Blockbuster getting two on Bram but he rolls outside and posts Bobby to take over.

More brawling offense from Bram on the floor but Roode slugs away back inside. That earns him a hard whip into the buckle for two and a charge into a boot, only to have Bram charge into a spinebuster. There’s the Roode Bomb but Bram rolls to the floor instead of getting covered, landing in front of a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles bag. Roode posts him but has to avoid the referee back inside, earning him a low blow and a handful of trunks to give Bram the pin at 14:05.

Rating: C. Totally average main event here with Roode dominating most of the match and then losing to a fluke at the end. That being said, I like the idea of having Bram get a main event win, even if the next few weeks have shown us that this changed nothing and was really just a match.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh yeah they knew no one was going to watch this show. It was basically a few steps ahead of a One Night Only show, which means you could miss the show and not lose a bit of anything. Nothing show here with a few watchable matches sprinkled throughout. In other words: standard Impact.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – June 10, 2015: X Marks A Lame Special

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 10, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

We’re closing in on Slammiversary and the big story is the announcement of the World Title match between champion Kurt Angle and new #1 contender Ethan Carter III. However, tonight is Destination X, meaning Rockstar Spud is getting the World Title shot against Angle. Other than that, we have the continuation of the best of five series for the Tag Team Titles between the Dirty Heels (who are finally acting like heels) and the Wolves. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on the X-Division as a whole before focusing on Spud cashing in. However, Austin Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase on the winner. There will also be three triple threats with the winners fighting in another triple threat for the title at a future date.

It’s time for the World Title match but Ethan Carter III and Tyrus cut Christy off. Ethan is livid that he isn’t getting the shot tonight so he’s staging an old fashioned sit-in. He dares anyone to come get him out of here so Kurt Angle comes to the ring. Angle gets all serious and threatens ankle pain to get Carter out of the ring.

TNA World Title: Rockstar Spud vs. Kurt Angle

Kurt is defending and takes Spud down to the mat with ease for a headlock. Back up and Spud is able to send Angle outside, only to eat a belly to belly on the floor for a huge crash. Angle takes it back inside and nails another suplex to set up a chinlock. An Angle Slam attempt is countered and Spud scores with an enziguri.

Spud slugs away and tosses Kurt to the floor, setting up a huge flip dive off the top. A superplex plants Spud back inside but he’s still able to escape the Angle Slam. There’s a running forearm to Kurt but he grabs an ankle lock, only to have Spud roll away into an Underdog attempt. Kurt charges into the post and eats the Underdog for a VERY close two, which shocks Spud. There’s the ankle lock with the grapevine and Spud taps at 8:35.

Rating: C+. Fun match but not enough to be anything really great. They did about as much as they could do in under nine minutes, but at the end of the day this was just a few steps above a workout for Angle. The Underdog was a nice near fall but this really was too short to work as well as they were hoping.

Here’s the Dollhouse to call out Awesome Kong. Taryn is willing to bare all to see who the toughest Knockout is, meaning Kong has to compete for the title in a lingerie pillow fight. They have the lingerie ready for her and it’s the only way she gets a shot.

Manik vs. Low Ki vs. Crazzy Steve

Winner advances to the X-Division Title match at a later date. Manik goes after Steve to start but Ki breaks up Manik’s suicide dive. Back in and Manik uppercuts both guys until Steve jumps into his arms, only to have Ki hit a springboard spinning kick to the face. Something like a Codebreaker gets two on Ki with Steve making the save. Steve misses a high cross body and gets kicked into Manik in the corner, setting up the Warrior’s Way to Manik to give Ki the pin at 3:28.

Rating: C-. It’s going to be a long night. Much like the other multi-man X-Division matches of late, this was just a few guys doing moves to each other and one of them getting a pin. What is there to say here? Ki makes sense as the winner but Manik would have been fine as well. The time hurt this, and I have a feeling that’s going to be the case with all three of them.

Grado is warming up for his triple threat later but he needs to lose weight to become X-Division. He teases some Parkour but doesn’t quite make it work. This is the guy that was supposed to be the most awesome thing ever? Not bad but really?

Recap of James Storm possibly murdering Mickie James last week. Apparently she wasn’t physically hurt.

Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Mandrews

We start with the triple headlock with Tigre speeding things up to take over. DJZ dropkicks him down though, only to have Mandrews slingshot in for a hurricanrana. A standing moonsault gets two on DJZ but Tigre comes in with a missile dropkick. Tigre slams DJZ down for two but Mandrews comes back in with a tornado DDT to put everyone down. DJZ is up first for a running flip dive to the floor to take out both guys again. Back in and Tigre shoves DJZ off the top and hits a Phoenix Splash (read as a spinning knee to the face) to pin Mandrews at 5:27.

Rating: C. Total spot fest here with no story or flow to the thing. That’s probably the best idea for these guys but there’s nothing that makes any of these triple threats stand out because there’s no reason to care about any of these guys. They’re just thrown out there to do these matches and that’s the last we see of them until it’s time for another big X-Division mess.

Post match Jesse Godderz comes down to destroy DJZ.

Grado continues to try to lose weight. He asks Tigre for some tips but there’s a language barrier. Grado leaves and Tigre calls him a jackass.

Knockouts Title: Taryn Terrell vs. Awesome Kong

Taryn is defending and this is a lingerie pillow fight. There’s a bed in the ring for the Dollhouse and Taryn laughs at the idea of Kong having to wear the lingerie. Kong comes out in her regular gear, much to Taryn’s annoyance. Marti and Jade are pulled to the floor for a beating so Taryn says the fans don’t get to see her in lingerie. “What a tease I am!”

Cue Brooke to say Taryn promised a title defense tonight and she’s ready anytime. Brooke shoves her down and the catfight is on as Kong is off making Jade and Marti into toothpicks. Taryn is disrobed and runs off. No match of course.

The Dirty Heels are ready for their tag match later, but Roode wants the first World Title shot.

Grado weighs in but strips off his singlet first. JB tells him there’s no weight limit so he’s good to go. I’ve seen worse.

Grado vs. Kenny King vs. Cruz

It’s a big brawl to start with Cruz being thrown to the floor and Grado getting kicked in the face. Cruz eats two running boots in the corner but Grado pounds on King’s back. We hit a chinlock on Grado for a bit before Cruz fails at lifting him up for a suplex. King kicks Grado in the face, leaving Cruz to cross body Kenny for two. There’s a Royal Flush to Cruz but Grado slugs away on Kenny, only to eat a chop to the chest. The Royal Flush doesn’t work on Grado, who sends Kenny outside and nails a Cannonball on Cruz for the pin at 5:18. Josh: “What a win and what a company!”

Rating: C. Another fun enough match with Grado having a ton of charisma, which I can finally see instead of constantly being told about how awesome he is. King not being in the title match is a nice change of pace, even though it’s pretty clear Low Ki is the major favorite to get the belt. Again.

Bram takes over a camera and says he’s going to the ring to make history.

After a break, here’s Bram to run down the X-Division and issue an open challenge to anyone who wants to fight in a six sided ring.

Bram vs. Crimson

Uh….sure. Crimson not being around for the better part of a few years is treated like getting a free coffee from a Shell station. Bram slugs him to the floor but Crimson takes over back inside. That sends Bram outside for a stroll, where he sends Crimson into the barricade. Back in and Bram scores with a kind of t-bone suplex, followed by a Rings of Saturn with a neck crank. Bram makes the ropes and hits the Brighter Side of Suffering for the pin at 4:38.

Rating: D. Well that happened. I’m glad Bram won but there isn’t much else to say here. Crimson coming back got zero reaction so it was nice to see him lose this quickly. I have no idea what this has to do with the X-Division, but then again TNA stopped caring about that thing like six years ago so I shouldn’t be surprised.

Kurt Angle says he’ll win.

Ethan Carter III says when he throws the first punch, Angle isn’t getting up.

TNA World Title: Austin Aries vs. Kurt Angle

Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase to get the title shot. Feeling out process to start until Aries clotheslines him down for two and nails a right hand in the corner. Aries flips out of a German and nails a low dropkick as we take a break. Back with Angle rolling Germans but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for two. There’s the Last Chancery but Angle escapes and grabs an ankle lock, only to have Aries make the ropes.

The discus elbow is countered into an Angle Slam for two. Angle misses the moonsault and gets caught in another Last Chancery, which really doesn’t look as good as they’re hoping for. The 450 is broken up by Angle running the ropes but Aries shoves him off for the 450 and a very near fall. Another Angle Slam is countered with two discus forearms but the brainbuster only gets two with Kurt putting a foot on the ropes.

There’s an ankle lock on the champion but he counters into one of his own. Aries rolls Kurt to the floor for a suicide dive, which goes right into the barricade. Austin is out cold and it’s another Angle Slam, only to have Aries counter into a rollup for two. Now the ankle lock with the grapevine makes Austin tap at 18:00.

Rating: B. Good main event match here but Angle is long past the point where you can call his spots in the big matches. How many times has someone put Kurt in the ankle lock, only to get countered into the same hold? Aries is his usual awesome self, but he needs something more than just being in a tag team that he’s already been in.

Ethan Carter III comes in and lays Angle out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It gets really tiring seeing TNA pay lip service to the X-Division and then abandon it for the next ten and a half months every single year. Notice that the Feast or Fired cash-in, which could happen at any show of the year, got WAY more attention than the X-Division cash-in, which was treated as an afterthought. This show is a waste of time on a division that stopped meaning anything years ago.

The show itself was really nothing to see other than a few spot fests and the usual good main event. Other than that though, this could have been any regular episode of Impact and no one would have noticed the X-Division as really standing out. I’d be fine if they just dropped the thing already because it’s clear that it doesn’t mean anything. Decent enough show but it never once felt special.

Results

Kurt Angle b. Rockstar Spud – Ankle lock

Low Ki b. Manik and Crazzy Steve – Warrior’s Way to Manik

Tigre Uno b. DJZ and Mandrews – Phoenix Splash to Mandrews

Grado b. Kenny King and Cruz – Cannonball to Cruz

Bram b. Crimson – Brighter Side of Suffering

Kurt Angle b. Austin Aries – Ankle lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XOUNBEA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Ring of Honor Ratings Are In

And they’re not too bad.According to 411mania.com,

– Ring of Honor’s debut on Destination America are in. The episode scored 163,000 viewers and a 0.04 rating in the 18 – 49 demographic.

For those curious, the numbers are lower than Impact Wrestling’s Wednesday debut by 45% and 55%, respectively. Impact scored 232,000 viewers and a 0.09 demo rating.

A bright point for Ring of Honor is that their 11 PM replay scored 110,000 viewers and a 0.03 demo rating, compared to the 85,000 and 0.03 that last week’s 11 PM Impact replay did. Impact’s midnight replay scored 72,000 viewers and a 0.02 demo rating.

 

There are a few things to keep in mind:

1. This is second run programing for Ring of Honor as it already aired on their syndicated stations.

2. Ring of Honor has a far smaller national footprint than TNA.  TNA was coming off a much bigger network while you could argue ROH has never been on the national stage (calling HDNet a national stage is as big a stretch as saying TNA is competent), meaning this was basically their national (as national as Destination America can be) debut.

3. With a show debuting on a new network, it’s common to see the numbers go up over the next few weeks as people find out about it.

 

All in all, this isn’t bad.  There’s room for improvement, but if Ring of Honor closes the gap, TNA is in big, big trouble.

 




Impact Wrestling – June 3, 2015: Rock Stars And Cash

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 3, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re finally getting to the build to Slammiversary, which is less than a month away. Impact is now on Wednesdays as the company’s issues with Destination America continues. There is no reason that this show shouldn’t start getting us towards Ethan Carter III vs. Kurt Angle for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Carter’s rise to the top of TNA.

A barbershop quintet sings Carter’s theme song because he is FINALLY #1 in the Impact rankings. Quintet: “For he’s the #1 contender, for he’s the #1 contender, for he’s the #1 contender, which nobody can deny!” We even get balloons falling to make this feel special. After denying us a Tyrus dance, Carter says there is only one thing left for him and that is to become World Champion.

This brings out Angle, who says Lou Thesz and Verne Gagne would be rolling over in their graves if they saw this. However, there’s someone else in line before Carter can get his shot and that’s X-Division Champion Rockstar Spud, who can cash in his title for a shot at the World Title next week. Carter isn’t cool with that and says he’s got an offer for Spud. Tyrus and Carter leave and Angle Slams one of the singers. Carter was awesome here and I can’t wait to see him finally get the title, assuming TNA doesn’t screw that up too.

Lashley vs. Eric Young

Lashley runs him over to start and hits a nice delayed vertical suplex to knock some of the sanity back into Young. Eric is able to send him to the apron though for a middle rope kick to the back of the head to get a breather. Back in and Eric starts working on the neck and we hit the chinlock. Pope’s great insight on commentary here: if Young wins he’ll move up in the rankings but if Lashley wins, he’ll move up in the rankings. Eric goes up top but dives into a backdrop followed by some elbows to the jaw. A spinebuster gets two for Lashley and after easily fighting off the piledriver, the spear pins Young at 5:29.

Rating: C. It’s amazing how much more tolerable that CRAZY man is when he isn’t in the World Title picture anymore. I’m fine with Young if he’s in the right spot on the card and this is a much better fit for him. I still don’t like the character because it’s not what they say he is, but at least they’re getting the booking a bit better.

Chris Melendez comes after Young post match but Eric escapes. This is even more like it for Young, though Melendez isn’t anything interesting.

The Dollhouse giggles about keeping Taryn’s title last week and Taryn offers Kong a shot next week.

Melendez wants to fight Young. I was thinking he wanted him over for afternoon tea so thanks for the clarification.

Austin Aries suggests that Spud doesn’t cash in the title for Option C.

Jade vs. Brooke

Jade goes right after her before the bell but gets rolled up for two. A Marti Bell distraction lets Jade take over and Brooke gets kicked in the face for two. Jade powerslams her down but misses a moonsault, allowing Brooke to hit a facebuster for two. Marti tries to come in and eats Jade’s boot by mistake, setting up the Tesshocker for the pin at 3:38.

Rating: C-. Not bad here as it’s nice to see the Knockouts having a bench to go with the title scene. I’m not sure why you have Brooke win here but it’s hardly a horrible idea. You don’t want the Dollhouse looking inept though as they looked more like weak heels instead of the sinister group they’ve been so far.

Carter is about to talk about Spud but gets a phone call.

Rebel and Brooke celebrate the win. Brooke leaves and the Dollhouse beats Rebel down.

Rising vs. BDC

Drake and MVP get things going with a slugout as Josh recaps the feud. It helps a bit but I still don’t get why this feud needs to exist. MVP wins a slugout and takes Drake down so King can come in with a quick chinlock. Off to Low Ki for a dropkick to the back of the head and the fast tags continue with all three members getting their shots in. Drew finally comes in off the hot tag and nails a running boot to Ki’s face as everything breaks down. Galloway gets caught in the Tree of Woe but is able to sit up and counter the Warrior’s Way with a belly to belly superplex. A Doomsday Device of all things is enough to pin Ki at 5:42.

Rating: C. The match was fine but this feud just keeps going. I get the idea they’re shooting for here but it’s so uninteresting that it’s hard to care. The Rising doesn’t need to exist because the BDC is a midcard stable who isn’t taking anything over. Hopefully both teams split soon enough.

Mickie James is in Nashville for her meetings but only James Storm is there. This story continues to be one of the best things going on in TNA.

Rockstar Spud can’t make his decision yet but there’s no more time. With no decision coming, here’s Kurt Angle to coax him a bit. This is his thirteenth World Title and he trained harder for this one than the other twelve combined so there is no way he’s losing it. Cue Carter and Tyrus to say Spud should stay right where he is.

Ethan just got off the pone with Dixie Carter, who is willing to offer Spud a lifetime contract as Chief of Staff if he doesn’t cash in Option C. Spud talks about the Carters taking him in when he had nowhere to go. They were like brothers, but then Ethan slapped him in the face and shaved his head. This is always about Ethan, because he’s had everything handed to him. Spud has given everything to get here and he wants no part of the offer. He cashes in for next week (SHOCKING!) and gets decked in the face. Angle wants a tag match tonight.

Aries gives Bobby Roode a shirt for their match.

Back to Nashville where Mickie wants to know what’s going on. Storm says the big stars are just fashionably late and says he can give her so much more. The music will always be there, but he wants to talk about something even bigger: joining him on his journey. He wants Mickie and her son Donovan to join the Revolution. Mickie appreciates the offer but turns him down. Storm laughs it off and Mickie hugs him before they leave. Storm: “There’s a lot of crazies out there.”

Dirty Heels vs. Wolves

Match #3 in a best of five series for the Tag Team Titles with the Wolves up 2-0. Aries takes Davey down with a Last Chancery early on but it’s quickly off to Roode to crank on the arm. The Wolves get in some double teaming to take over on Roode and then backdrop the legal Aries into their corner. Roode breaks up a double dive and Aries takes out the Wolves’ knees as we go to a break.

Back with Davey breaking up a catapult into Aries and diving over for the tag, only to have Aries pull Eddie to the floor. The hot tag works a few seconds later and it’s Edwards coming in to clean house. Some rapid fire chops have Roode in trouble and the heels (who aren’t heels) are backdropped to the floor for a double suicide dive into the barricade. An enziguri into the German suplex into the jackknife cover gets two on Roode.

Aries pulls Davey to the floor, leaving Edwards to take the catapult into the forearm, followed by the slingshot elbow from Roode for a very close two. Something like Chasing the Dragon (Michinoku Driver instead of a brainbuster) gets two on Roode but Aries comes back in with a 450 to Edwards for two more. Aries dives onto Edwards and it’s time for a chair. Roode doesn’t want to use it but he’ll hit Eddie low behind the referee’s back. A chair shot on top of that is enough to pin Edwards at 13:13.

Rating: B-. Well at least they’re heels now. I’m not a fan of the matches where it’s all a huge mess after about five minutes in and the tagging is completely forgotten. It’s fine for a bit but having the majority of the match be a wild brawl gets annoying after a bit. At least the match was fun though and the ending gave us some heels in the feud.

Storm and Mickie walk along the side of a train until James knocks her down what looked to be a flight of stairs.

Here’s Madison Rayne to complain about not getting any attention around here because she isn’t putting candy in someone’s mouth or isn’t Gail Kim. She calls Velvet Sky to the ring because people who don’t work here can come through the crowd and get in the ring. Madison slaps her in the face and eats a Stunner, so here’s Angelina with security to take Velvet out. Angelina slaps Velvet before the security takes her away…..and here are more security guards to arrest Love for slapping a fan. Well played actually.

Taryn lays on her bed and promises to take care of Kong next week.

Ethan Carter III/Tyrus vs. Kurt Angle/Rockstar Spud

Spud stomps Carter down at the bell and chops away in the corner. A kick to the head drops Ethan but Spud would rather hit some running forearms instead of tagging, which allows Tyrus to grab Spud by the face. Some backbreakers have Spud in trouble and Carter makes it worse with a belly to belly. He opts to pose instead of cover though and the hot tag brings in Angle. Tyrus breaks up the ankle lock and eats the Angle Slam, allowing Spud to dive in for the pin at 6:48.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match to set up the showdown next week. Angle vs. Carter is clearly the big prize here but we need to get Option C out of the way because where would we be without that? There wasn’t much here but they didn’t have the time to get anything done. The fact that it’s for a short term title shot didn’t help things either.

Aries comes out and says he’s cashing in next week to face the winner of Angle vs. Spud.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of their better shows in a decent while but there are still some issues. For one thing, there are way too many cash ins going on at the same time when it’s clear they’re just killing time until we get to Carter. Well either that or they’re going to do the dumbest thing they could and go with anything other than Carter getting the belt at Destination America. Good show, but too much being packed into too little time.

Results

Lashley b. Eric Young – Spear

Brooke b. Jade – Tesshocker

Rising b. BDC – Doomsday Device to Low Ki

Dirty Heels b. Wolves – Chair shot to Edwards

Kurt Angle/Rockstar Spud b. Tyrus/Ethan Carter III – Spud pinned Tyrus after an Angle Slam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XOUNBEA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – May 29, 2015: Does It Really Matter Anymore?

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 29, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Al Snow

After all the insanity that’s been going on behind the scenes in this company, they’re really in need for a good show to calk things down a bit. This show is being billed as May Mayhem, which is their version of a pay per view this month. The main event is Eric Young challenging Kurt Angle in an I Quit match. Let’s get to it.

Eric Young pulls up to the arena where Kurt Angle is waiting on him. They slug it out in the parking lot until security breaks it up.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell

Inside a cage with Taryn defending. Gail goes right after her in the aisle and takes over before the bell. They finally get inside with Kim still dominating until Marti Belle reaches through the cage to pull Gail down, allowing Taryn to ram the ring finger into the cage to take over. Gail fights back again with ease until she tries to climb out, allowing the Dollhouse to interfere again, allowing Taryn to hit a quick Cutter for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: D. Well aside from how great Taryn looked, this was borderline worthless. At the end of the day, you need more than five minutes for a cage match. This is supposed to be some big blowoff to the feud and instead the whole thing can’t even make it to six minutes? The Dollhouse is awesome, but they played it pretty straight here, which defeats the purpose.

Post match the Dollhouse goes after Gail until Awesome Kong comes out. They manage to lock the door though, setting up the big beatdown. Taryn takes Gail’s ring off and stomps on Gail’s ring finger, apparently breaking it so the ring can’t go back on. Josh: “I know Taryn has issues we’re not supposed to talk about on air but this is going too far.”

So, unless they’re actually going to say what happened in Taryn’s marriage, this is going to be another big tease that never goes anywhere. Also, this would be more effective if they didn’t keep name dropping Gail’s celebrity chef husband, who is so famous that I’ve already forgotten his name.

Quick recap of James Storm being creepy and getting Mickie James to come back for one more match. Her husband Magnus isn’t pleased with this but that’s exactly what Storm wanted. Josh: “This isn’t PG.”

Here’s Mickie (in a very, very revealing dress) to talk about things. She can’t wait for the one more match but tonight she needs to talk about family and the heart. Magnus is her fiance, but James Storm has been a friend for years now. This brings out Storm, prompting Mickie to apologize for Magnus bashing him in the head with a guitar. James doesn’t need to hear that but Mickie insists on apologizing, even though Magnus is just trying to protect his family.

Storm insists he’s not a bad guy (has any good guy ever had to say that?) because if holding a door open for a woman or keeping her from getting attacked by Bram makes you a bad man, then yeah he’s a bad man. We hear about all the gifts James bought the family but Mickie didn’t think some of them were that funny.

James redeems himself by surprising Mickie by saying he’s set up some meetings with big names (like Billy Corgan) who want to meet Mickie and advance her career. Whatever Mickie picks, he’ll have her back. Storm leaves and Mickie tells the Cowboy (her word) she’ll see them in Nashville. There was a very subtle addition here as Storm kept inching closer to Mickie, making her back up a half step every little bit.

Kenny King isn’t worred about defending the X-Division Title in a gauntlet match.

Eric Young shows us a Tweet that we can’t see and headbutts through a window.

X-Division Title: Gauntlet Match

Why do we always need a gauntlet match or an elimination match or something other than a scheduled one on one match? There are seven people in this and another enters every 90 seconds. The first five will be eliminated over the top but when there are only two left, it’s a regular match for the win. Manik is in first and Rockstar Spud is in second and Champion Kenny King will be in seventh. Both guys go for eliminations until Manik sends him into the corner and DJZ, now with a blue/purple mohawk, is in third.

Manik gets double teamed until Mandrews is in fourth after a low less than ninety seconds. Spud and Mandrews team up on Manik but Spud can’t quite get him out, even as he bites Manik’s fingers. No one is eliminated yet and Argos is in fifth to speed things up for all of five seconds. Mandrews misses a shooting star and gets sent to the apron, setting up a kick to the face and a ram into the post for the first elimination. Crazzy Steve is in sixth as we take a break.

Back with Tigre Uno, who entered sixth during the break, being eliminated. Kenny King comes in seventh and the final group is everyone other than Tigre Uno. A big kick to the head drops Manik and another kick does the same to Young. Steve gets in a few shots and chokes over the ropes, only to get superkicked out to put us at five. Argos gets kicked to the floor for an elimination, followed by Spud jumping on King’s back. He manages to avoid elimination but eats the Royal Flush.

DJZ gets back up with a belly to back suplex into a facebuster on King, only to get backdropped out by Manik a few seconds later. Down to Manik, Spud and King with Manik offering an alliance with the champ. Spud is tossed to the apron but Manik jumps King from behind, only to be thrown out with an assist from Spud to get us down to the singles match. King chops Spud down and rips at his face but the Royal Flush is countered into a small package to give Spud the title at 16:48.

Rating: D+. So here’s one of TNA’s major troubles explained in one match. This was a major title match and had no build, no hype, and nothing interesting. There was no drama to anything here as the people came in and were eliminated before we got down to the final two for a very quick match with Spud winning. There was no reason to care about this and it a lot of that is due to how the match was booked instead of the action. The wrestlers didn’t have time to do anything and it caught up with them quickly.

Dirty Heels vs. Wolves

This is match #2 in a best of five series with the Wolves up 1-0. Roode throws Aries through the ropes for a suicide dive to start but Davey runs inside for a dive of his own on Aries. The Wolves double team Roode inside until Austin gets back in and things settle down a bit. Edwards chops away at Aries but Austin punches him in the face, setting up a tag to Roode for chops of his own.

The Heels (who aren’t heels) load up what looked like a Sharpshooter but Aries gets kicked into his partner, allowing the Wolves to double team even more. Davey puts Rode into a reverse figure four (with Roode facing the mat and Davey facing up) for a unique looking submission. The German suplex into the jackknife rollup gets two as the announcers are overhyping the heck out of this. Eddie puts Roode in a chinlock for a bit until Bobby fights up and makes the hot tag to Aries.

Austin speeds things up and snaps both Wolves’ throats across the top, setting up a missile dropkick to Edwards. There’s the Last Chancery on Davey and a Crossface to Eddie but both Wolves make the ropes. Something like Chasing the Dragon but with a Michinoku Driver instead of a brainbuster gets two on Aries but he pops right back up for the running dropkick in the corner, followed by the 450 to Eddie with Davey making the save. Another Last Chancery has Edwards in trouble but Richards comes in off the top with a double stomp for the save, setting up the powerbomb into a Backstabber to pin Austin at 11:09.

Rating: B. This was straight out of the indy playbook with the entire match being action from bell to bell. That sounds cool on paper, but between everything going all over the place and Josh telling us about two minutes in that this was a classic and something we were going to remember forever, the match kind of dulled on me very quickly. It’s definitely fun, but I prefer building up to the insane finish instead of just having it run the entire match.

Kenny King can’t get hold of MVP and wants him to call back.

Here’s Angelina Love to deal with Velvet Sky, who is sitting in the audience. Love brings out her own personal security to deal with Velvet if she tries anything. She screams at Velvet (with a voice that Vickie Guerrero would find annoying) and tells her to try something, of course drawing Velvet over the barricade for a quick beating until security pulls her off. Sky beats up security and goes after Love again until she’s handcuffed and taken away.

Mr. Anderson is very happy to not have Tyrus around for his match with Ethan Carter III tonight.

Ethan Carter III vs. Mr. Anderson

Anderson has a one man cage to lock Tyrus inside, guaranteeing that it’s one on one. Amazingly enough, Tyrus doesn’t want to go in so Anderson goes after him, allowing Carter to ram him face first into the cage. Back in and a quick suplex gets two for Carter as Snow challenges Dixie Carter to a street fight. A running clothesline gets two more on Anderson but he throws Carter through the ropes and into Tyrus, who still isn’t in the cage. Anderson nails Tyrus with a chair a few times to FINALLY get him in the stupid cage.

They slug it out back inside with Anderson taking over with the usual. A powerslam and backdrop get two each but Mr. gets crotched on top, setting up a TKO for two. Carter hits a Stinger Splash (complete with shout) but the 1%er is countered into a Regal Roll and Swanton for the same. The Mic Check connects for two and Anderson is stunned. He loads up another but Carter counters into a 1%er for the clean pin at 8:00.

Rating: C-. That’s a pretty clear ending to the feud, but my goodness TNA needs to slow down. This match started with a flurry with the Tyrus stuff then was just trading big moves for a few minutes until Carter won. They have to speed through everything on every show because they need to get so much stuff in. Calm down a bit and spread some stuff out so that stuff like this can have time to breathe.

Anderson offers a handshake but Carter shoves the hand away. Tyrus is left in the cage.

Rockstar Spud is very, very happy to be a two time champion. He hasn’t even had time to think about Destination X and Option C yet but maybe he needs a new goal.

TNA World Title: Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending and this is an I Quit match. Both guys come out with security after being separated all night in another idea that didn’t go anywhere. Angle goes right at him to start and they’re slugging it out a minute in. Eric tries to jump over him in the corner but gets caught in rolling Germans to knock him even sillier. He won’t quit though so Kurt rolls even more Germans, only to be sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Young slapping on a Figure Four for a bit until Angle turns it over, sending Young to the ropes.

Eric can’t get an Angle Slam so he puts Kurt in an ankle lock with a grapevine, only to have Kurt reverse into something resembling a Figure Four. More ropes are grabbed so Young goes up, only to dive into the real ankle lock. Young taps so Angle lets go, but Young never said I Quit. The distraction lets Young hit a low blow and piledriver. Still no quitting so Young loads up another piledriver, only to be countered into the ankle lock with the grapevine to retain Angle’s title at 13:10.

Rating: C-. Raise your hand if you expected ANYTHING but that as the ending. That’s where this match and feud died with me: no one in their right mind thought Young was winning the title at any point in this feud and that makes for some very dull matches. The match was watchable, but my goodness don’t let this feud keep going any longer and get Young down the card where he belongs.

Overall Rating: D+. This one didn’t do it for me. They were flying through every possible thing they could get through tonight and it made the show a lot weaker than it should have been. The matches were good while they lasted, but none of them had time to set up any kind of story or psychology, which really kills the show.

We’ve got a few weeks before Slammiversary and then just a few weeks before Destination X and then a few months before the show is probably getting kicked off the air because not enough people watch it. Could it be because they rush through hastily announced gimmick matches like these and don’t let anything have a proper build because they have to get through everything they can when they have two pay per views a year and seemingly could do things at whatever pace they want? This was an action heavy show but the lack of a foundation takes away anything good they had set up.

Results

Taryn Terrell b. Gail Kim – Cutter

Rockstar Spud won a gauntlet match, last eliminating Kenny King – Small package

Wolves b. Dirty Heels – Powerbomb into a backstabber to Aries

Ethan Carter III b. Mr. Anderson – 1%er

Kurt Angle b. Eric Young – Ankle lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XOUNBEA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Meltzer Says Impact Has Been Canceled

Obviously take this with a pound of salt, but allegedly Destination America has canceled the show and it’s done in September.  Apparently the ratings have been strong but not strong enough to warrant the money put in.  No word on if this is true or if it’s going to stand up going forward, but if there’s truth to this, TNA is in major trouble.  Again.




Impact Wrestling – May 15, 2015: Let That Be Enough

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 15, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Mike Tenay

We’re coming off the big live show last week and rolling towards Slammiversary at the end of June. The big story at the end of last week’s show was Angle making Eric Young tap to retain the title, presumably to end their feud. Other than that we have the continuing story of the Rising vs. the BDC as Drew Galloway was beaten down by a pipe last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Angle vs. Young, who tonight will lead two teams in a hardcore war. Good grief just get to Carter vs. Angle already.

Here are Angle and Chris Melendez to start things off. Angle talks about going to war with Young last week, but Eric sided with the BDC. Well now Kurt has backup of his own, including Chris Melendez. He needs a bit more though, so Angle would like the Rising to come out here right now. Kurt calls them a breath of fresh air in this company as they try to eliminate a cancer calling itself the BDC.

Galloway praises Angle a bit but likes the look of that World Title. Angle likes the idea but here’s Eric Young to say he got ripped off last week. Kind of like we’re getting ripped off from having a good World Title challenger. Young was ripped off by the guest referee so he’s owed another title shot. He goes on and on until Angle tells him to shut up because the stupidity caught him last week.

Angle tells him to shut up again and offers Young a title shot in an I Quit match. That’s for the future though because tonight is about hardcore. Cue the BDC to go after everyone in the ring. Young comes in to help with the beat down but Lashley comes out to complete Angle’s team and make the save. So it’s going to be a twelve man hardcore war later tonight? That’s a bit excessive no?

Brooke/Rebel vs. Dollhouse

Marti/Jade here. Rebel is described as a former member of the Menagerie. The Dollhouse cleans house to start with Marti hammering on Rebel in the ring. It’s quickly off to Jade for some knees to the head. The double teaming continues as Matthews confirms that the Menagerie is no more. Dang it I always like that act. Brooke comes in off the hot tag and fires off some forearms as everything breaks down. Rebel misses Christy’s old Flying Firecrotch Guillotine (yep) and a double slam (think a chokeslam but lifting under the arms instead of by the throat) is enough to give the Dollhouse the pin at 3:57.

Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t much but I’m digging the Dollhouse more and more every single week. Taryn is perfect as the borderline psycho leader, but the supporting cast is cool too as they can both go in the ring. Rebel and Brooke are fine as the good looking jobbers for them and the match was fine for what it was.

Post match Taryn says she has play time scheduled with Gail Kim’s family.

The BDC and Eric Young are texting Homicide but he won’t be here tonight. MVP has a replacement but Young has someone better. King doesn’t trust him but MVP wants the crazy man on his side instead of against him.

Here are Ethan Carter III and Tyrus with the former wondering how he isn’t #1 contender after the former #1 contender lost to the champion last week. He wants answers but gets Mr. Anderson with a chair instead. Anderson is disappointed when they leave because he wants to fight someone tonight. They start to walk but Anderson suggests a match with Tyrus. If he wins, he gets Carter in the future. After some swearing insults at Tyrus, the big man says get a referee out there.

Mr. Anderson vs. Tyrus

Anderson hammers away to start but gets run over for two. A Big Ending gets two and Tyrus slams him down again for the same. Carter tries to bring in the chair but gets ejected, allowing Anderson to play possum and counter the spike into the Mic Check for the pin at 4:36.

Rating: D. Really, really dull match here and yet another instance of stretching out a feud before we get to the beyond obvious Angle vs. Carter feud for the title. This one is far more interesting than the Young version but it’s clearly just filling time because having more than a month build to what is likely the Slammiversary main event doesn’t work.

We take a quick look back at Magnus blasting Storm with the guitar last week.

Magnus wants Storm out here right now but gets Abyss instead. The monster says there are consequences for what you do and this week, Magnus’ consequences are Abyss. It’s a brawl at ringside instead of a match with Abyss taking over only to stop to throw in some barbecue equipment (cross promotion with a Destination America show about barbecuing). Abyss loads up the chokeslam but takes some tongs to the crotch, only to have Manik try to come in. That earns him something like a brainbuster but Khoya comes in with a walking stick to lay Magnus out. Magnus eats a chokeslam for good measure.

Quick recap of the Tag Team Title situation with the Wolves and Hardys having to vacate the belts, setting up a best of five series between the Wolves and Dirty Heels (I’m really not sure how to feel about that name) for the belts.

Wolves vs. Dirty Heels

That’s their official name now and this is match #1 in the best of five series. It’s also Edwards’ first match back from injury. Roode and Richards get things going and for some reason the camera is zoomed in on Roode as they get started. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Richards vs. Aries with the Wolves taking over on Austin’s arm. Aries is driven into Davey’s knee but sends him into the corner, allowing for the tag off to Bobby.

A catapult sends Eddie into a forearm from Aries, followed by the slingshot elbow for two. The running dropkick in the corner is countered and Edwards hits a dropkick of his own to put Roode down. There’s the hot tag to Richards for the “make your opponent DDT his partner” spot (one of the dumbest spots I’ve ever seen) before the powerbomb/Backstabber is countered with a hurricanrana. Aries takes out the Wolves with a suicide dive, followed by the corner dropkick to Richards. Davey is still in it though and counters Roode’s spinebuster into a sunset flip for the pin and the first match at 8:26.

Rating: B. Good match here but they’re still waiting to crank it up in the later matches. These are two of the better teams in wrestling a the moment and seeing them fight five times (perhaps with some gimmicks later on) is going to be really entertaining and likely blown off at Slammiversary.

Galloway picks Micah over Eli for the hardcore war tonight.

Taryn talks about going to see Gail Kim’s stepdaughters earlier today. She’s also going to show us what she’s wearing for Kim’s husband Robert.

Storm yells at the Revolution for going after Magnus without permission. This is between him and Mickie James and no one else.

Here’s the Dollhouse again with Taryn in a robe. Taryn makes fun of Gail for being so serious of a wrestler because the Dollhouse is making something special. She has pictures of her with Gail’s stepdaughters who look borderline terrified. But now, here’s what she’s wearing for Gail’s husband. It’s some very revealing lingerie so here’s Gail, but Marti asks why she’s so serious. Gail wants a match with Taryn but Taryn brings up the husband again, meaning the fight is on with the Dollhouse running.

Jesse Godderz vs. Robbie E.

Robbie has straightened his hair a bit. This is fallout from their brawl a few weeks ago and they bump fists to start. That’s the highest impact of the match though as Robbie grabs a rollup for the pin at 24 seconds.

Godderz wants to restart the match so here we go again.

Jesse Godderz vs. Robbie E.

Jesse throws him down with authority but a majistral cradle is good enough to make Robbie 2-0 at 31 seconds.

Godderz wasn’t ready so let’s do it one more time.

Jesse Godderz vs. Robbie E.

The fans count the seconds this time and Jesse celebrates a headlock. A dropkick gets two with Jesse driving his forearm into Robbie’s face. Robbie comes right back with a crucifix for the pin at 1:10.

Godderz is livid so he hits Robbie in the head with the mic. He throws Robbie to the floor and puts a chair around Robbie’s neck before driving it into the post.

Angle fires up his team for tonight. Eli Drake still doesn’t look happy.

Eric Young has a fifth guy.

Mr. Anderson is having something built to help deal with Tyrus.

Team Angle vs. Team Young

Hardcore war, which apparently means a gauntlet match, which seems to be Lethal Lockdown minus the cage but with weapons. Low Ki with his pipe and Drew Galloway with a pipe of his own start things up. First fall wins with 90 second intervals and Team Young won the coin toss (duh) to have the advantage. Low Ki loses his pipe early and Drew takes him to the floor for some hard chops instead of laying pipe into him.

Kenny King is in next with a weapon that is knocked out of his hands too quickly to notice. Galloway eats some chops against the barricade as King pulls out a cane to nail him in the back. Micah and a nightstick even things up and the Rising takes over with the usual brawling. Eric Young is in next with a trashcan lid (that is one CRAZY trashcan lid. Like, you know your crazy Uncle Stu who thinks he’s Catherine Zeta-Jones? It’s crazier than him) and he quickly sets up a Tower of Doom, but Galloway sits up out of the Tree of Woe into a German suplex to take everyone down.

Kurt Angle comes in with what looks like another pipe but throws it down for a bunch of Germans. We take a break and come back with MVP (kendo stick) and Chris Melendez (another pipe) involved. Eric’s mystery partner, with another kendo stick, is Bram. Team Young cleans house for a bit until Lashley completes the field, meaning it’s now first fall wins. Lashley avoids all of King’s kicks and plants him with a powerslam.

MVP’s Playmaker is countered but Bram cracks Lashley in the head with a kendo stick, setting up the Brighter Side of Suffering. Micah hits a Big Ending (just like Tyrus earlier) but King springboards in to take him down. That’s fine with Galloway who takes most of Team Young down with a big flip dive over the ropes. Angle dives on everyone not named Young or Melendez, leaving Eric to hit a quick piledriver for the pin on Chris at 17:21.

Rating: D+. Basically this existed so it could exist. There was no real need for this to be a gauntlet match or a hardcore match as a ten man tag would have accomplished exactly the same thing. That’s the bad sign for a gimmick: you can do the exact same thing without the gimmick being in place. The match was nothing special though and really could have done with being cut down to eight people.

Post match Young rips off Melendez’s leg and chokes Angle out with it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show felt really rushed and packed full of stuff. It felt like they were cramming in as much stuff as they could and it brought down the good stuff they were doing. You can see most of Slammiversary from here, but some of it really isn’t that interesting. I mean, the Rising vs. the BDC just keeps going with no real reason to exist. The tag team series is good, but it’s not something that’s going to blow the doors off the place until it gets closer to the end. The show should be good, but the build isn’t great so far.

As for tonight…..meh. The hardcore war didn’t do anything for me as you have ten guys with weapons in a gauntlet format. Clearly that just needs 100 minutes of build. The battle of the BroMans could be good and they got through the whole thing in like eight minutes so points for that. The Anderson vs. Carter and Angle vs. Young feuds feel like they’re just going for the sake of going, but Angle vs. Young seems to be moving towards wrapping up. It’s a decent enough show, but they’ve cooled way off in recent weeks.

Results

Dollhouse b. Brooke/Rebel – Double lifting slam to Rebel

Mr. Anderson b. Tyrus – Mic Check

Wolves b. Dirty Heels – Sunset flip to Roode

Robbie E. b. Jesse Godderz – Rollup

Robbie E. b. Jesse Godderz – Majistral cradle

Robbie E. b. Jesse Godderz – Crucifix

Team Young b. Team Angle – Piledriver to Melendez

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1998 Pay Per View reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00UYAMB8U

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling Moving Back To Wednesdays Starting June 3

According to Dixie, though I’m sure you all know this as EVERYONE follows her on Twitter right?  I’d much rather have three hours to do on Wednesdays (counting NXT) and have Friday night off.  There’s no way around the Friday night death slot, though I’m always curious to see TNA diehards’ latest explanation for why the ratings still aren’t great.




Impact Wrestling – May 8, 2015: Coming Attractions

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 8, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh Matthews

For the first time in weeks, we actually have a special episode. This is airing live from Orlando with the promise of a former World Champion returning in the first five minutes. Other than that we have Kurt Angle defending the World Title against Eric Young to probably blow off their feud. Let’s get to it.

Eric Young is in the ring to start and promises to win the title back tonight. This brings out the returning World Champion and it’s Bully Ray, who will referee Angle vs. Young. Eh cool but it’s nothing earth shattering. It doesn’t help that it’s for Angle vs. Young which is just a placeholder until Cater challenges Kurt.

We get the opening recap video. They’re treating this like a huge show.

Here’s Ethan Carter to talk about the democratic process which has lead us to a gentlemen’s contest: arm wrestling. This brings out Mr. Anderson to show us the results: falls count anywhere wins with 85% of the vote. Shocking indeed.

Mr. Anderson vs. Ethan Carter III

This is billed as falls count anywhere but the rules make it sound hardcore. Anderson quickly sends Carter and Tyrus to the floor but the big man gets in some cheap shots. That’s fine with Anderson who sends Tyrus into the post and chases after Carter as he tries to get away. We get the first weapons brought in as Anderson pulls out a bunch of chairs to pile up on the floor.

A Mic Check onto the chairs doesn’t work so Carter backdrops Anderson onto the ramp for two. Carter makes the mistake of spitting in Anderson’s face, earning him a Regal Roll onto the chairs for two. Back in and Anderson hammers away before planting Carter with a swinging neckbreaker. Tyrus comes back in to earn his check with a t-bone suplex and a corner splash. The spike to the throat puts Anderson down for the pin at 5:39.

Rating: C-. Well that was quick but they were smart to keep this quick given how obvious the booking seems to be. Young is a guy who could bounce right back after all these losses so why not feed him to Carter to get us on the fast track to Angle vs. Carter? Everyone knows that’s where it’s going so why not just keep this quick?

Bully Ray likes the look of Angle’s World Title.

Gail Kim goes up to Awesome Kong and asks if they’re on the same side tonight. Kong walks away.

Quick recap of BDC vs. the Rising.

Here’s the BDC, wearing masks during their entrance, with something to say. MVP holds up his mask and says it belongs to Homicide, but he can’t be here tonight because someone blindsided him on his way back here, sending him to the hospital for surgery shoulder. Now he’s not saying the Rising did it, but they must know something about it. MVP goes on a rant about the American government taking foreign oil fields and being cheered, but when the BDC tries to take something, they’re called thugs. That’s a new word for something censored, which was probably a racial term given how MVP was going.

Cue the Rising, who says they fight in a ring instead of the streets. Think about it though: a man called Homicide isn’t the most endearing person in the world. The Rising had nothing to do with the injury, but maybe it was someone closer to home. Where was Kenny King last night for example? MVP says he doesn’t care about wrestling. It’s all about the money and power that comes with the job. Drew cares about workrate but MVP cares about interest rate. Wasn’t MVP the one who came to TNA to make things better for wrestling? MVP wants a match right now so let’s do it live. The brawl is on and we take a break.

MVP vs. Drew Galloway

Joined in progress after a break with MVP choking on the ropes and bending the arm around the ropes. A slam off the middle rope gets two and they trade big boots with Drew’s knocking MVP outside. Drew follows him and gets slammed head first into the barricade for a loud thud. Back in and the Playmaker is countered into the Futureshock to give Drew the pin at 4:45.

Rating: D+. The match was watchable but this is one of the least interesting feuds I can remember in a long time. They’re doing the right things, but there’s just nothing to make me care. The (maybe) racist part could be interesting and feels like Corgan’s first story addition. It’s not likely to make me care about the feud, but the wrestling and promos have been fine. I just don’t care.

Post match Eric Young (in CRAZY pink) comes in and helps the BDC beat down the Rising with a chair. Despite Young being an associate of the team when it formed, this is treated as a surprising turn of events.

James Storm is here with a present for a special friend. They should just call him Christmas because he’s always giving.

The preview for next week is all about Kurt Angle and asks who’s next. I know that’s a Destination America ad but it’s almost guaranteeing that Angle retains tonight.

Here’s James Storm with his present. He can talk about being tough and drinking beer, but it’s time to give someone else the spotlight. This brings out Mickie James to a very nice ovation, but Storm wants to talk about her being a mother. Everyone should love their mother, but Storm quickly switches over to Mickie’s music career. She’s an amazing mother, wrestler and singer, but she’s also a great friend. He holds up the box and it’s a new guitar. Storm tries to sing a bit but Mickie politely shakes her head no.

They take a picture together (not a selfie Storm) and here’s Magnus with a forced smile. Storm has a gift for him too: the spiked helmet from the Brutus Magnus days. Magnus and Mickie leave but Storm pulls out a blanket for their son Donovan. That’s too much for Magnus, who comes back in and breaks the guitar over Storm’s head. Like a truly creepy man, Storm starts smiling. They are NAILING this story and Storm is making it awesome. How can he be the same guy that led the worthless Revolution?

Eric Young wants the BDC to have his back to deal with Bully Ray tonight.

We go backstage at Robert Irvine Live (Gail Kim’s real life husband and a celebrity chef) where Taryn Terrell shows up. Gail gets in her face and that’s about it.

Gail Kim/Awesome Kong vs. Dollhouse

Jade jumps Gail to start but gets thrown down by a hurricanrana, so it’s off to Marti vs. Kong. Everyone but Taryn comes in and the Doll House is thrown into the same corner and splashed by the monster. We settle down to Marti hitting a running faceplant on Gail, setting up a cannonball from Jade for two.

Marti slams her down for two but it’s off to Jade, who is very slowly slammed down onto Gail’s knees. Kim’s Black Widow is broken up by Taryn but Gail dives over for the hot tag. The Dollhouse has to save their boss from an Implant Buster and everything breaks down. Jade takes an Implant Buster but Taryn counters the Eat Defeat on Marti with a rollup for the pin at 5:32.

Rating: C. This was fine and the right ending as I’m still loving Taryn and the Dollhouse as a whole. They’re setting up the big blowoff with Gail vs. Taryn, but I’m hoping we don’t get another Gail title reign. We’ve been there time after time and I don’t see what else she can do with the title.

We look at Jeff Hardy breaking his leg and see Matt holding both Tag Team Titles.

Magnus asks Mickie to have nothing to do with James Storm anymore. Mickie isn’t thrilled and leaves.

Here’s Matt Hardy to address the Tag Team Title situation. Jeff is going to be healing for a long time, so as of right now, the titles are vacant. That means it’s time for Matt to go home and figure out what’s next for him.

As he leaves, here are Bobby Roode and Austin Aries with something to say. Aries hasn’t forgotten Young putting him on a stretcher to send him out of the Impact Zone on a stretcher. That brings Aries to another piece of gold: the World Tag Team Titles, which seem to have a curse on them. Yeah they’re constantly being vacated, but that sounds like an opportunity. He and Roode have held the Tag Team Titles and didn’t get hurt, so Roode thinks the titles should be defended by two of the best wrestlers in the world today.

This brings out Davey Richards, who says no one has fought more battles for those belts than the Wolves. Aries likes the idea, but there’s no team in front of him. Not quite says Davey, because Eddie Edwards is back. Eddie has been cleared to wrestle and who better to start against than Roode and Aries? That’s fine with them, but Eddie wants to one up it: a best of five series. Hands are shaken and the series is on.

After a break, Matt Hardy goes to leave but Drew Galloway stops him to offer him some food for thought: things are changing a lot and he could use a good man.

Angelina Love is in the ring to talk about being asked everything going on lately. However, she just wants to talk about herself because she’s the only Beautiful Person around and the best Knockout ever. Cue Velvet Sky because these two are cursed to be around each other for all eternity. Velvet looks…..sleepy. Anyway, Angelina sucks up to her but Velvet, now with pink/purple highlights and a left arm tattoo sleeve doesn’t say anything. Instead it’s a spear to start a catfight as the fans are going mild. Security breaks it up.

Recap of Young beating Angle in a stretcher match last week.

Young asks Ray if he’s going to be the next one to stab him in the back. Ray says he’s just here to referee.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young

Bully Ray is refereeing and Angle is defending. Josh on Angle: “If anything ever happened to Captain America, Kurt Angle could easily be an Avenger.” A quick belly to belly puts Young down but he fires off some elbows in the corner to take over. Eric is sent to the apron so he runs to the top, only to have Kurt run the ropes and superplex him down. The BDC is watching from the stage as we take a break.

Back with Young getting two off a neckbreaker and choking in the corner. The chinlock slows Angle down for a bit before Angle fights up and wins a slugout. Now we hit the rolling Germans before the ankle lock sends Eric to the ropes. Kurt won’t let go so Eric rolls Angle out to the floor. A CRAZY low blow puts Ray down and the BDC starts triple teaming Angle.

This brings out Chris Melendez and the Rising to help Angle before fighting to the back. Young loads up a piledriver on Ray but gets backdropped down, setting up the Angle Slam for two on Eric. Why there hasn’t been a DQ called yet isn’t clear. Eric hits a quick piledriver for two but goes up for a cross body, only to have Angle roll through into the ankle lock to retain at 14:33.

Rating: C. The match was ok but the most obvious ending ever and an unnecessary brawl in the middle didn’t do it any favors. Now hopefully we can get away from the Young vs. Angle story and get on to Carter taking the title at Slammiversary because I never want to see Eric get another title shot.

Angle poses on the stage for a long time and no one attacks him to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Good enough show this week but it’s really nothing memorable. Ray coming back is cool, but they would have been better off by not announcing it as a former World Champion as Dixie’s clues made it a pretty obvious reveal. The Sky return was the same obvious swerve, which doesn’t leave a lot going on here. This was basically a preview for what they have coming, which is fine as it’s the start of a new cycle, but there wasn’t much to see here.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Mr. Anderson – Pin after a spike to the throat from Tyrus

Drew Galloway b. MVP – Futureshock

Dollhouse b. Gail Kim/Awesome Kong – Rollup to Kim

Kurt Angle b. Eric Young – Ankle lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1998 Pay Per View reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00UYAMB8U

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6