Impact Wrestling – March 6, 2015: Stop. Before It Gets Bad.

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 6, 2015
Location: Manchester Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

Coming out of last week, we seem to not have a #1 contender. Lashley successfully defended the title against MVP, though the match featured a lot of interference. Other than that we have the continuing stories of Mr. Anderson/Spud/Mandrews vs. Tyrus/EC3, which has gone from a comedy feud to one of the more entertaining feuds in the company. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with the Beat Down Clan getting close to taking the World Title from Lashley but Gunner and Drew Galloway made things even enough for Lashley to retain the belt.

Tonight it’s Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young for the #1 contendership.

Here’s the Beat Down Clan to get things going. Kenny King doesn’t want this Drew Galloway situation to get any further out of control. Drew is known as the Chosen One, but he choose to interfere in BDC business. I thought he was known as rhythm guitarist for some band with three guys. So now, it’s time for the BDC to choose what part of Drew they’re going to hurt.

MVP says this is Beat Down Clan business that was a year in the making. He arrived just over a year ago to become the World Champion but Drew got in the way. MVP is reasonable though and is willing to let Drew come out here and apologize. Galloway shows up in the crowd and says he’s at home right now. He came to the ring last week to stop MVP from stealing the title. He’s surrounded by wrestling fans, not sports entertainment fans.

Drew is here to give the fans a voice and asks some fans their names. Those are the people the BDC is screwing with and that isn’t going to fly. King says they demand retribution and threatens Galloway’s family if he doesn’t get in the ring tonight. Drew wants King one on one so King agrees to send his brothers to the back.

Drew Galloway vs. Kenny King

Both guys are in street clothes. King enziguris him down and MVP comes in for a few stomps. That’s not a DQ due to reasons not explained but Galloway comes back with knees in the corner and a snap suplex. King bails to the floor but Drew is fine with beating him up outside as well. He drops King over the barricade but King gets in some shots to the ribs to take over. A tilt-a-whirl slam onto the apron has King in even more trouble as this has barely been a match so far.

Back in and King drops him ribs first over the ropes and we hit the chinlock. An overhead belly to belly gets two for Kenny but Drew gets all fired up. He gets two off a top rope clothesline but King breaks up the Future Shock (snap double arm DDT). They need to go home already because this is getting bad. King hits a quick springboard Blockbuster for two more and frustration is setting in. He loads up a backslide of all things but gets countered into the Future Shock to give Galloway the pin at 6:25.

Rating: D. I really wasn’t feeling this one as they were just trading spots for a few minutes with no flow or structure to the match. Galloway is talented in the ring but having a big guy as the hero is always kind of awkward, especially when he’s in there against someone not very big. Not a good debut but at least Galloway won.

The BDC chases Drew off post match.

Here’s Roode to talk about the three way tonight. He promises to take out Young and get the title shot in one match. No one can stand in his way, but here’s Angle to disagree. He comes down to the ring but Eric Young sneaks in to go after Roode. Angle pulls him off and gets in a fight with Young, only to have Roode clear the ring.

Video on Awesome Kong vs. Taryn Terrell for the Knockouts Title later tonight.

James Storm talks to Bram about joining the Revolution and asks him to take out Matt Hardy later tonight. Bram seems intrigued.

Before we go to a break, we get a video on the winner of tonight’s triple threat facing Lashley for the title in two weeks. They say his name over and over, show his picture, and show him winning the triple threat. I’ll avoid spoilers, but my goodness TNA, cut this nonsense out.

Video on Kurt Angle.

Matt Hardy vs. Bram

The bell never rings before they start fighting in the corner. Matt avoids a charge and hits the clothesline and running bulldog, followed by a second clothesline to send Bram outside. The brawling favors Bram of course and he takes over by driving Matt into the apron. Back in and some right hands set up a chinlock. Matt fights up and scores with a Side Effect, followed by a moonsault to the legs for two. Bram shoves the referee away though, setting up a low blow and the Brighter Side of Suffering (inverted DDT) for the pin at 4:15.

Rating: D+. Just a quick brawl here but Bram joining the Revolution could be interesting. That being said, they need to actually do something with the team before it gets stale by just sitting there. This wasn’t much of a match though and I’m not wild on another DDT finisher from someone out of the UK.

Bram gets his wrench but Magnus runs down for the save. When Bram left him laying in an alley, Magnus had two choices: go home and hide, or be the kind of man that his son could be proud of. It’s personal now, and Magnus is going to make Bram’s blood stain the holy ground of England.

Spud promises Anderson that he’ll finish things with Ethan Carter III tonight.

Galloway says he’s tired of the Beat Down Clan dominating the show and he isn’t going to stand for it. He has an army in his corner and it begins tonight.

Recap of Spud vs. Carter.

Here’s Spud in a Union Jack flag to thank the fans for getting him through all these problems. Everything has to end though, so he’d like Ethan Carter III to come out here right now, face to face. That’s exactly what he gets with Carter in a suit of his own. Spud wants to end this man against man but Carter goes into his usual speech about his accomplishments.

That’s not what Spud wants to hear though as he tells Carter to shut up. Of course Spud knows everything about Ethan’s career because he was there with Carter every step of the way. If that’s so important to him, fight Spud one on one so he can end Carter’s streak. Carter agrees, provided that Spud puts up his hair. Spud agrees, but thinks Carter’s hair should be on the line too.

Ethan bends down to look Spud in the eye and says challenge accepted, but just remember one thing: in this world, the bad guys win. Carter goes to leave but Spud brings up all the times Carter told him he was a lion or a gazelle. Well he isn’t any of those things, because he’s a man. As usual, this is the best feud TNA has had in months if not years. I can’t believe I’m saying it but my goodness it’s awesome.

Eric Young video.

Knockouts Title: Awesome Kong vs. Taryn Terrell

Taryn is defending and goes right at Kong, only to bounce off the monster and hit the mat. Kong keeps pounding away and slams the champ down, only to miss a charge in the corner. Some right hands stun Kong for a few moments but the Taryn Cutter is shrugged off. The second attempt goes just as well but Kong shoves the referee away for the DQ at 4:15.

Rating: D. This was angle advancement instead of a match and that’s fine. They were clearly setting up the big showdown later on, but this protected Kong at the same time. The problem with someone like Kong is you have to either give her the title or beat her and end her credibility. It’s hard to grade this as a match though as it was basically a squash until the storyline ending.

Taryn gets beaten up post match but Gail Kim runs out for the save.

Video on Davey Richards turning down the Revolution’s offer to join, setting up a rivalry between the teams.

Bobby Roode video.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Abyss/James Storm

The Wolves are challenging but get jumped by the rest of the Revolution during their entrance. We get the opening bell and everyone brawls in the ring with the Wolves sending Storm into Abyss and making the monster DDT his leader. I really, really hate that spot. Things settle down to Abyss hammering Richards down but missing a splash. Manik pulls Edwards down to the floor to break up the hot tag though and it’s off to Storm.

The Revolution tries to double team but Richards crawls between Storm’s legs for the hot tag to Edwards. Eddie starts cleaning house but eats a Backstabber and the Eye of the Storm for two. Cue Matt Hardy to stare at the rest of the Revolution, allowing Eddie to grab an O’Connor Roll for two. Storm grabs a jumping neckbreaker and tags in Abyss, only to have him get sent to the floor.

The Wolves hit three straight double dives to take out everyone not named Storm but Edwards kicks him down. Manik and Sanada sneak in but Sanada mists Manik by mistakes. Abyss tries to bring in the cowbell but Matt comes in with a Twist of Fate, setting up the top rope stomps from the Wolves (dubbed the Hammer of the Gods) for the pin at 8:15.

Rating: C-. Good night this was a mess and I was losing track of everything by the end. TNA really needs to cut down on the mass carnage and interference in their matches because this isn’t making things any better. The Wolves winning is fine, but three things: who do they defend against, what is the point of the Revolution at this point, and HOW BLIND IS THE REFEREE??? You had all that interference, a cowbell and MIST but he never calls a DQ? Really?

Post break, Matt endorses the new champs.

Spud vs. Carter in the hair vs. hair match is next week in London. Magnus vs. Bram as well.

Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a title shot in two weeks. More on that later. For the third of five matches tonight, we have a brawl before the bell with Roode and Young beating each other up on the floor. Roode sends Young into the aisle before coming back in for a suplex from Angle. Eric gets back in and tries to German suplex Roode but Bobby grabs the referee. Instead it’s a neckbreaker to put Roode down as Angle is sent to the floor.

Young stays in control but gets small packaged for two, only to take Roode’s head off with a clothesline. A superplex on Roode is turned into a Tower of Doom with Angle powerbombing both guys down. Angle rolls a ridiculous ten Germans on Young but Roode counters the Angle Slam into the crossforehead. That’s countered into the ankle lock (probably because it wasn’t pulling back on Angle) but Roode rolls through into a crosseyes.

Young makes the save but takes the spinebuster from Roode, who gets Angle Slammed for two. There go the straps and Angle puts Young in the ankle lock but Eric makes the ropes. Angle rolls through the Roode Bomb into another ankle lock, only to have Roode roll through and bump the referee. Young hits Roode in the head with a chair, only to have Angle kick him down and hit the Slam on Roode for the title shot at 8:41.

Rating: C-. There were some major issues with this match. First and foremost was Eric Young, because he sucks. He makes things that shouldn’t possibly suck suck. Like an air pump that blows air into things. Eric Young could make it suck. You put Eric Young’s face on the New England Patriots’ jerseys? They suck.

Eric Young is appearing at a frat house and giving away free beer? The frat boys would go to church and drink orange juice instead because Eric Young sucks. Eric Young sucks. He sucks on trains, he sucks on cars, he probably sucks on orange flavored popsicles. Why would he do that? Because orange flavored popsicles suck, just like Eric Young.

So yeah, Eric Young sucks. Other than that though, this match needed to go longer to live up to the hype this match had been given in the show. It’s another short match that didn’t have the time to get anywhere because TNA has to pack everything they can into a single show and fit in all their promos that don’t advance anything.

There’s one last thing that held this match back though: TNA spoiled the ending. Yeah, earlier in the night there was a preview for the March 20 show. Here’s a paraphrased version of the audio. “KURT ANGLE has battled back to the top of TNA (with a clip of Angle pinning Roode) and is now the top contender to the World Title. On March 20, Angle will challenge TNA World Champion Bobby Lashley. Don’t miss this huge clash.”

So all that drama that they could squeeze in to the less than nine minutes they could give this match? Totally worthless, as they had given away the ending already. They did this a few weeks back when Lashley was in Lethal Lockdown. This is something they REALLY need to work on. You could easily have switched the audio to “WHO WON???” and the problem is solved. But it’s TNA, where the most basic things are difficult but having an entertaining show is becoming more common.

Lashley comes out for a staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was the end of the run of really good shows but it was still good. Here’s the thing TNA still has over Raw at the moment: they set stuff up, give it a good build, then mostly deliver on it (after spoiling it half the time). WWE is the opposite as they have a bad build but the payoff is usually good. They need to slow things down though and let some of the matches stretch out. That’s making the shows feel like Attitude Era episodes: they go by so fast that I can’t tell if it was good or not.

The other major issue here is the lack of a focus. So Galloway is now feuding with the entire BDC, the Revolution is….I think feuding with the Hardys and Wolves, Bram might be joining the Revolution and is feuding with Magnus, and we’re getting Roode vs. Young again because they’ve been feuding so now they keep feuding? There’s good stuff in TNA right now, but they feel like they’re holding things together with some strong duct tape. That’s only going to last so long and this episode showed some cracks.

Results

Drew Galloway b. Kenny King – Future Shock

Bram b. Matt Hardy – Brighter Side of Suffering

Taryn Terrell b. Awesome Kong via DQ when Kong shoved the referee

Wolves b. Abyss/James Storm – Hammer of the Gods to Abyss

Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode and Eric Young – Angle Slam to Roode

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Impact Wrestling – February 27, 2015: I’m Running Out Of Things To Complain About

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 27, 2015
Location: Manchester Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 3,300
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

It’s off to England now after two pretty solid shows in Scotland. The main story coming out of last week is MVP earning a World Title shot by winning the gauntlet match, even though it was more of a group effort from the Beat Down Clan. Other than that we have the continuing story of Bram vs. Magnus, which should pick up again here in England. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the gauntlet match with Kurt Angle almost surviving the entire BDC but finally getting caught at the end.

Here’s Kurt Angle who doesn’t waste any time in calling out Lashley. Kurt says Lashley doesn’t have to respect him, but he needs to respect the title. Last week Lashley didn’t do anything to help him in the gauntlet match, but Lashley rightly says that wasn’t his fight. Therefore tonight, it’s MVP vs. Lashley and Angle won’t be there to help him. Lashley doesn’t want his help because it’s his own fight. Angle says he won’t help him and leaves.

Lashley is about to do the same but the Beat Down Clan interrupts. Joe says the BDC doesn’t need luck because tonight, the Clan’s MVP will win the title by any means available. MVP says no one has Lashley’s back, so tonight the Clan gets its belt back. This wasn’t bad but the Lashley vs. Kurt exchange was kind of lame. Lashley didn’t want help so Angle emphasizes that he’s not getting help? That came off kind of odd.

The announcers talk about what happened. I really like that they emphasize that Taz used to be a World Champion. A lot of younger fans might not have seen him in the ring (he retired about thirteen years ago) so just throw in that he used to be a big deal. It gives him some credibility instead of just letting him seem like some old guy.

Mr. Anderson/Rockstar Spud vs. Tyrus/Ethan Carter III

Anderson does his intro and Spud gets in a quick intro of his own. Tyrus reluctantly reveals his shaved head and no sells a right hand to the face from Anderson. Mr. hammers away in the corner before it’s off to Spud for more of the same. A bite to the head only makes Tyrus mad though and he plants Spud with a World’s Strongest Slam. Does that make him a mashed potato? Spud misses an elbow from Carter and makes the hot tag to Anderson, who hits a pretty bad looking neckbreaker for two on the big man.

The fans chant for Spud as Tyrus hits Anderson low and slows things down. Back to Carter for some right hands in the corner. I’m so glad his arm injury hasn’t kept him out of the ring for too long. Carter is way too good to be on the sideline that long. Tyrus slams Anderson down but COMPLETELY misses a Vader Bomb (his feet might have hit Anderson’s chest if Anderson hadn’t moved but that’s it), allowing for the tag to Spud. An Underdog (Dudley Dog) drops Tyrus and Anderson adds a low blow and the Mic Check, allowing Spud to get the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C-. This is as entertaining of a feud as there is in wrestling right now. Spud is nailing his underdog roll and Carter has mastered the idea of being an evil heel that you want to see lose. Hopefully that leads to the World Title for Carter, as he’s probably the best heel not named Bully Ray in years for TNA.

We recap the formation of the Trio, which led to the Beat Down Clan and helped Lashley beat Eric Young for the World Title. I always enjoy seeing Eric Young in pain.

After a break, Ethan promises to shave Spud’s hair tonight.

Here’s Taryn Terrell to address Awesome Kong. Kong may have made her intentions clear, so get out here so Taryn can do the same thing. Instead here’s Gail Kim to tell Taryn how tough Kong is. If Taryn thinks Havok was tough, think about what Kong did to her. Taryn knows what she wants and is ready for Kong anytime. Kim leaves and the lights go out. Kong is in the ring and shrugs off everything Taryn throws at her before planting her with the Implant Buster. That could be deadly for Terrell.

The BDC throws the camerman out of their meeting.

We look at the BDC helping Lashley win the World Title back in January and then attacking Lashley just two weeks later.

Austin Aries might have a surprise for us tonight and holds up the briefcase.

Chris Melendez/Brooke vs. Robbie E./Angelina Love

I still don’t get the appeal of Melendez. Yeah it’s impressive that he can get around on one leg, but once you see that it’s pretty much the end of his usefulness. He’s not bad, but he’s a pretty generic power guy other than the leg. Robbie gets in a cheap shot on Chris but gets hammered down and suplexed for two. Off to Brooke vs. Robbie with E. mocking her with Karate Kid crane poses, allowing Love to sneak in with some shots to the back. Some dropkicks send Love over to tag E. but eats a flapjack first. DJZ offers a distraction though, allowing E. to shove Brooke off the top for the pin at 3:26.

Rating: D. Eh it’s a comedy feud so it’s kind of hard to really complain about this match. If nothing else we get to stare at Brooke and E. is so over the top and insane that it’s a lot easier to sit through. As I said though, where was Melendez at the end? He can’t handle someone like the BroMans?

Carter tries to go into Spud’s locker room to shave his head but Anderson makes the save after a break. Tyrus ran in to help out his boss. Didn’t we cover this already?

Gunner wants to know why Angle is leaving but Kurt says Lashley doesn’t want him around. That’s not enough for Gunner who wants the old Angle back. He slaps Kurt in the face but nothing comes of it.

Here’s Austin Aries with something to say. He’s thinking about cashing in this Feast or Fired briefcase tonight, but here’s Samoa Joe to interrupt. Joe isn’t going to allow Aries to cash in the case tonight because he can have trained assassins on him at any given moment. Would those be the ninjas in the panel vans? Aries wants to know where the old Joe has gone and a challenge is thrown out. Joe says bring it so Aries dives through the ropes to take him down.

Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe

Joined in progress after a break with Aries hammering away in the corner. Joe is too big to have his brain busted though and sends Aries out to the floor. Back in and Joe stomps away before driving a knee into Aries’ ribs. This isn’t the most interesting stuff so far. They slug it out with Aries getting the better of it, only to eat a running boot to the face and the backsplash for no cover.

We hit the bearhug on Aries for a bit before Aries low bridges him to the floor. A big top rope ax handle nails Joe but the brainbuster still doesn’t work. Aries escapes the Muscle Buster and hits some discus forearms to set up the Last Chancery. I’d buy that hold as more of a threat if it ever won anything. Cue Kenny King with the briefcase for a distraction, allowing Joe to put on the Clutch. Aries sends him face first into the case (not a DQ because of course not) and hits a 450 for the pin at 7:55.

Rating: C+. These kind of matches feel like they’re just going through the motions more often than not. There’s almost no reason for these two to be fighting other than they need something to fill in the card. It’s not a bad match or anything, but it just comes and goes and is another match on the show that I won’t remember later.

The BDC comes in post match and puts Aries on the table. Low Ki hits the double stomp to Aries’ ribs but the table doesn’t break all the way. Instead, Joe adds a running backsplash to really send Aries through the wood.

Lashley says MVP has to go through him to win the title. He doesn’t need Angle’s help either. WWE, take note on how to keep your monsters short and to the point like this.

MVP praises Eric Young for injuring Roode last week. Young thinks there’s a hole in his heart and he has to fill it in with revenge. MVP suggests getting some of that revenge on Lashley for taking his World Title last year.

The BDC has stolen Aries’ Feast or Fired briefcase.

Noam Dar vs. Rampage Brown

Both guys are from British Boot Camp but before they can get very far, Bram comes in to beat up both guys with Impaler DDTs at 0:54.

Bram wants Magnus out here right now but he gets Grado instead. Grado dances down and gets in Bram’s face, only to get run over with ease. The third implant DDT puts Grado down again but there’s no Magnus.

TNA World Title: MVP vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and runs him over to start before hitting a running clothesline in the corner. Some more clotheslines set up a delayed vertical suplex as it’s all Lashley so far. Again, this is what Reigns should be doing. MVP bails to the floor but the rest of the BDC tries to interfere, earning then ejections as we take a break. Back with MVP sending him into the steps for two and kicking the champ in the back.

More stomping ensues as we get to the core problem with MVP: he isn’t the most interesting guy in the ring. Kenny King and Samoa Joe are still at ringside for a stomping as I guess only half of the team was ejected. Back inside and MVP stomps away even more but both guys collide to put them down again. Lashley charges into the corner and plants MVP with a spinebuster for two. MVP tosses him with a suplex but misses the Black Out.

A spear drops MVP but the referee is bumped as well, as per the contractually obligated ref bump in title matches. Cue Eric Young with a chair to Lashley’s back but Bobby Roode comes out to break up a piledriver attempt. Young is gone so Lashley hits a powerslam on MVP, but the BDC breaks up the pin again. Cue Gunner to take out Joe, allowing MVP to hit the Play of the Day on Lashley for two. MVP grabs a chair but Drew Galloway takes him down, allowing the spear to retain Lashley’s title at 15:45.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t great but this was about Lashley fighting off all odds to keep his title. It’s a basic story but TNA is pulling it off well enough. They telegraphed the ending with Angle vs. Lashley earlier in the night and I’m sure MVP will get the title one day, but the BDC is starting to look weak without being able to get the big belt. There was too much insanity here for my tastes but I’ve seen far worse.

Overall Rating: C+. TNA continues its nice roll with another good, although not great show this week. Lashley vs. Angle vs. MVP is an interesting feud but hopefully it doesn’t add up to another triple threat match for the title. The rest of the show is actually more entertaining that I was expecting and the midcard is pretty easily more entertaining than WWE’s. However, is there a reason these guys are all fighting? A midcard title wouldn’t be the worst thing for TNA, but for now it’s surviving well enough.

Results

Rockstar Spud/Mr. Anderson b. Tyrus/Ethan Carter III – Spud pinned Tyrus after a Mic Check from Anderson

Robbie E./Angelina Love b. Brooke/Chris Melendez – Shove off the top

Austin Aries b. Samoa Joe – 450 Splash

Noam Dar vs. Rampage Brown went to a no contest when Bram interfered

Lashley b. MVP – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – February 20, 2015: Basic, Well Done Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 20, 2015
Location: SSE Hydro, Glasgow, Scotland
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

It’s another UK show this week with a double main event. This week we’re seeing Al Snow face British Boot Camp cast off Grado, as well as a twenty man gauntlet match for the #1 contendership to the World Title. As expected, it looked like the Beat Down Clan will be working together to take over the match. Let’s get to it.

The opening sets up the gauntlet and shows us the top 5, which will determine the order of the last five entrants. Angle is #1, despite Roode being #1 last week and winning while Angle lost. Roode isn’t even in the top 5, meaning this whole thing lasted two weeks before it stopped making sense.

Angle comes out and says he’s back to win the World Title.

Lashley wants to talk to Angle.

Matt Hardy/Eddie Edwards/Davey Richards vs. Revolution

It’s Storm/Abyss/Manik here and the brawl starts in the aisle. Manik gets triple teamed in the corner to start and we even get something like Poetry in Motion. Khoya pulls Matt to the floor and Storm sends him into the steps to take over. It’s off to Abyss for a running corner splash, which is as athletic as I’ve seen him in years. Storm comes in with a Hardy pose on the middle rope but Matt grabs a Side Effect on Manik. They’re going with the fast forward version of the standard formula here and it’s not bad so far.

Storm can’t break up a tag to both Wolves at the same time and it’s time for the kicks. Everything breaks down and Richards backflips into an attempt at Shock Treatment but Edwards makes a save and sends Storm into a DDT from Abyss. I still hate that spot. The Wolves hit stereo dives to take out most of the Revolution. Manik is left alone for a top rope double stomp from Edwards for the pin at 6:30.

Rating: C. This is becoming TNA’s standard operating procedure in recent weeks: basic, well done matches that don’t go too far and just get the job done that they’re supposed to accomplish. That’s a VERY nice change of pace over what we usually get in TNA and even though I don’t believe they can keep it up, it’s a nice start.

The winners get destroyed post match and Abyss Black Hole Slams Manik. Storm orders Abyss to carry Manik out.

Here are Ethan Carter III and Tyrus to rant about Mr. Anderson stop the hair cut party last week. Ethan even jumps up and down in anger for a funny moment. Cue Anderson to ask a very sweaty Carter why he’s obsessed with cutting hair. Maybe Carter should get his head shaved and Anderson has his own clippers. Anderson comes to the ring but Tyrus gets right in his face. The distraction allows Spud and Mandrews to sneak up on Carter and the beating is on. Tyrus saves his boss from a haircut but Anderson plants him with a Mic Check and tape him to the ropes, allowing Spud to shave Tyrus’ hair. Spud says Carter is next.

MVP and the Beat Down Clan are going to be standing tall at the end of the night.

Mickie James comes into the arena and is here for some important business involving Magnus. I’m glad Josh mentioned that Mickie and Magnus are married, as it was coming off like something TNA just expected us to know. That’s not something you should ever do as you don’t want any potentially new fans to be confused.

Al Snow vs. Grado

We get a few more details on Grado, who missed a meeting on British Boot Camp and was eliminated, only to come back and get eliminated again. It would be nice if TNA actually SHOWED us this stuff instead of just telling us but at least it’s something. Snow destroys him to start and hits the Snow Plow for two, followed by a moonsault for the same. Grado is really over with the fans here and you can see that cult following showing through. Grado avoids a second moonsault and hits a boot to face, followed by a Cannonball in the corner and another big boot for the pin at 4:33. It’s as abrupt as it sounds.

Rating: D. The match was nothing but it gave the fans a feel good moment. I still have no reason to care about Grado due to living in America and not being able to watch British Boot Camp, but this was much more for the fans than nothing else. I’m not sure how much Grado can get over outside of Scotland but that natural charisma will get him a long way. Granted I would have said the same thing about Joey Ryan the first time they did this story.

Snow shakes Grado’s hand as he promised to do if he lost but the BDC runs in for the attack. Drew Galloway (McIntyre) runs in with a pipe for the save and shows about 100x more energy and fire than he has in the last three years plus. He’s a good hire if he’s around for more than just this tour.

Angelina Love and the BroMans are their usual selves but Kong is shown watching with her usual scowl.

Knockouts Title: Angelina Love vs. Taryn Terrell

Love is challenging and jumps Taryn to start, knocking her out to the floor. A fall away slam gets two but Angelina takes too much time going up and gets slammed down. Taryn gets two of her own off a middle rope clothesline but walks into the Botox Injection. Love takes too much time going after her though and eats a Taryn Cutter for the pin at 2:37.

Kong comes out and Implant Busts Taryn but Gail Kim comes out for the staredown.

We get Royal Rumble style interviews on who is going to win the gauntlet.

Robbie is ready to win the Grand Slam.

Ethan Carter can beat twenty men in his sleep.

MVP has been fighting all his life (but is he trouble trouble trouble trouble trouble?) so this is nothing.

Low Ki says the BDC runs this place.

Samoa Joe says 20 men will enter and a Clan will leave victorious.

Here’s Tommy Dreamer for a chat. Dreamer says he’s here to fight because Young dropped him on his head last week. No Young though, so Dreamer goes to the back and gets jumped. They fight back into the arena and Tommy wants a referee out here for an old school fight.

Eric Young vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer spits a fan’s beer into Young’s face but gets crotched on the barricade. Young apparently may be insane and violent but he’s not a thief. He also bites Dreamer’s forehead and draws some VERY solid blood before Tommy gets out a table and we get the opening bell. They head inside but Tommy is able to backdrop out of a piledriver attempt.

The DDT onto the chair is countered with a leg sweep but Eric takes too long setting up a table. Dreamer superplexes himself through the table with Young barely grazing it. A chair is wedged into the corner but Dreamer pops back up. Eric low blows him to take over, sends him into the chair and plants him with a good looking piledriver for the pin at 4:22.

Rating: D. Two of my least favorite wrestlers in the world right now in a needless gimmick match which didn’t even get five minutes. That bite was SICK though and the piledriver looked really good too so I can give it a pass, but my goodness I never want to see these two on TV ever again. Well maybe Young if he drops way down the card but Dreamer is as welcome as something very unwelcome at a place you wouldn’t want that something to be at.

We recap Magnus vs. Bram, which is due to Magnus taking a Feast or Fired briefcase from Bram.

Here’s Mickie James to talk about her fiance’s feud with Bram. She’s had a great year, including having a beautiful son and getting engaged (fans: “BOO!” Also Josh was wrong when he said they were married. Don’t get into Tenay territory Matthews), but she’s here to call Bram nothing but a coward. Cue Bram with a cueball but Mickie immediately rips into him for all the things Magnus has done for him over the years. Magnus was beaten up so badly that he can’t even hold his own son.

Bram starts talking but it’s so quiet that I can’t understand him over the WE WANT MAGNUS chants. The chants aren’t even that loud but the microphone is so quiet. Bram says Magnus could have any girl in the world but he’s stuck with her. Mickie is a needy redneck who ruined his life. That’s why Bram battered him, but Mickie says it’s because he knows he’s only half the man Magnus is. Bram gets all ticked off so Mickie slaps him in the face. Referees come out to hold Bram back and he leaves peacefully. This is already about a million times better than any Magnus story.

Lashley and Angle are in the back (with HARDCORE COUNTRY playing) and Lashley reminds him that he’s the champ. Angle says Lashley is next, so Lashley will be watching tonight.

Gauntlet Match

Basically a twenty man Royal Rumble for a title shot next week. Kenny King is in at #1 and Austin Aries is in at #2 with King sending Austin to the apron, only to have Aries run back in and hit the Pendulum Elbow. King hammers him back down though and Craazy Steve is in at #3. Steve and Aries team up but the clock gets a lot faster and it’s Jesse Godderz in at #4. Jesse goes right after Steve but has to skin the cat to avoid an elimination.

Bram is in at #5 and people start pairing off for fights in the corners. The clock gets even faster as Khoya is already in at #6. Steve rakes Khoya in the eyes but is easily backdropped to the floor for an elimination. Chris Melendez (where has he been?) is in at #7 and goes after Bram until Mr. Anderson is in at #8. Anderson is back in trunks and hammers away until we take a break.

Back with Tyrus entering at an unlisted number. During the break, Samuel Shaw, DJZ and Great Sanada all entered, putting Tyrus as #12. Also during the break, Melendez was the only man eliminated. Everyone’s attempts to get at Tyrus result in Godderz, DJZ and Shaw being eliminated. Spud is in at #13 and goes after Tyrus, only to get sent to the apron and spiked out to the floor. Robbie E. is in at #14 as Tyrus puts out Khoya.

Sanada mists Tyrus from the apron but Anderson knocks Sanada to the floor and sends Tyrus to apron as well. Tyrus hangs on and tries to skin the cat but Anderson bites his hand for the elimination. Gunner is in at #15 and goes right after Bram. We have Gunner, Bram, Anderson, Robbie E., King and Aries in there at the moment. Ethan Carter III is in at #16 as Robbie is dumped out.

There go Bram and EC3 as Samoa Joe is in at #17. That goes nowhere so here’s Low Ki at #18. It’s already announced that MVP and Angle are the final two, meaning Roode isn’t in it due to the attack by Young last week. We’re running out of time so MVP is quickly in at #19. Joe throws out Anderson and it’s all four members of the BDC, Aries and Gunner at the moment. The BDC dumps Gunner and it’s Angle in at #20 for a final grouping of Aries, MVP, Low Ki, Joe, King and Angle as we take a break.

Back with Aries being eliminated to get us down to five. Lashley comes out to watch as the Clan takes their time beating Angle down. Kurt gets in something like a hot shot on Low Ki but Joe Rock Bottoms him out of the corner to stop Kurt cold. Kurt low bridges Joe to the floor and the odds are a bit better.

Low Ki gets backdropped to the floor and it’s down to three. King gets the same treatment, leaving us with Angle vs. MVP. Kurt is still in trouble though as he gets caught with the Ballin Elbow but MVP can’t get him out. A baseball slide misses though and the Black Out does the same, only to have King trips Angle, allowing MVP to kick him out for the win at 32:25.

Rating: C. Keeping this fast was a good idea as it became a pretty boring battle royal once the BDC was in full control. MVP winning makes the most sense as you have to give him a title shot at some point. Angle can have his shot later but the BDC is the big thing right now and giving its leader the win was the right call.

Overall Rating: B-. The wrestling here wasn’t the best but that’s not the point of this show. Tonight was a good example of logically moving stories forward and not doing anything incredibly stupid (save for putting Tommy Dreamer on TV in 2015 but that’s a different story entirely). This is a MAJOR step forward for TNA as their product is getting better, even though their business is pretty horrid at the moment. At the end of the day though, getting some positive word of mouth is the best thing they can have right now and shows like this will get them a long way in doing so.

Results

Matt Hardy/Wolves b. Revolution – Top rope double stomp to Manik

Grado b. Al Snow – Al Snow – Big boot

Taryn Terrell b. Angelina Love – Taryn Cutter

Eric Young b. Tommy Dreamer – Piledriver

MVP won a gauntlet match last eliminating Kurt Angle

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Impact Wrestling – February 13, 2015: Heaven Help Me

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 13, 2015
Location: SSE Hydro, Glasgow, Scotland
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

We’re back in the UK this week for the first of several taped shows. This tour usually results in some very high energy shows with the crowd eating up whatever TNA gives them. For once that seems more deserved as these recent shows have been a lot more entertaining and well put together than some of the last ones on Spike. Tonight is about the fallout from Lockdown so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Lashley saying he wouldn’t team with Angle until he changed his mind a week later and helped his team win Lethal Lockdown.

The BDC arrived earlier, now in matching gear. MVP tells them to forget what happened last week because it’s time to show everyone what they do. Eric Young is here and I’m just going to start calling him a member of the team. The only reason he isn’t at this point is TNA said he wasn’t, but it’s close enough so yeah he’s a member of the team.

Here’s Angle to open the show. He’s usually been on his own, but he has to thank Gunner and Aries for helping him last week. The BDC wants to say they control the World Title, but the best wrestler in the world controls that title. Angle invites Lashley out here right now and they shake hands. Lashley says he was there to get his hands on MVP, not to help Angle. That’s fine with Angle, because he wants to be World Champion again. It actually has been a very long time.

Before the champ can say anything, here’s the BDC to interrupt. MVP says last week’s pin in Lethal Lockdown is stripped from the record books for some reason so now and it’s time for one of those two to get a beat down. Lashley cuts MVP off and issues a challenge to either two of them for a tag match against himself and Angle. This was a totally acceptable opening segment, but more importantly it was done in about ten minutes. Take notes WWE.

Austin Aries stops Bobby Roode in the back and goes over their history together. Roode of course respects Aries and agrees to give the fans something special. Unlike the opening segment, I have no idea why this was necessary.

We look back at Jeremy Borash preventing EC3 from cutting Spud’s hair last week.

Carter says he’s wealthy so he gets whatever he wants, and that would be to shave Spud’s head. Tonight it’s Carter/Tyrus vs. Mandrews/Spud/Borash.

Austin Aries vs. Bobby Roode

So they’re actually trying to make this Top 5 concept mean something. Next week there will be a 20 man gauntlet. The first fifteen entrants will be at random but the last five will be determined by the top five. Aries comes into this match at #3 and Roode is #1, basically making this match for the last spot in the gauntlet. The prize is of course a World Title shot the following week.

They trade arm holds to start with Aries going to a headstand but getting caught in an early Crossface. That goes nowhere but neither does Aries’ early Last Chancery. Both of their other finishers miss as well and Aries is sent to the apron but he shoulders Roode in the ribs and hits the slingshot hilo for two. Fast start here. Aries follows him to the floor with a huge top rope ax handle but gets dropped with a gordbuster back inside.

The spinebuster sets up the Blockbuster for two but Aries fights out of the Roode Bomb. Maybe Bobby should have stuck to busting. Austin knocks him off the top rope and hits the missile dropkick, followed by a discus forearm to send him outside. The suicide dive hits the barricade though and Roode takes over. Back in and Aries gets caught in the Crossface for the tap out at 8:21.

Rating: B-. The match was entertaining but the ending was kind of surprising. It does fit the idea of Aries hitting the barricade, but it’s rare to see someone with a top ranking cleanly defending it like this. By saying “this is for the #1 spot in something”, you’re almost guaranteeing that it’s going to change. The surprise isn’t a bad thing though and it worked quite well.

Roode says this is pro wrestling. I’d call that a pretty big stretch. Aries leaves and Roode says it’s time to get his title back. Roode vs. Lashley III never happened and he deserves a rematch. Cue Eric Young to jump Roode from behind and plant him with a piledriver. Of course he does, because where would we be without Eric freaking Young to take the focus off a good match and a logical story progression to keep up a feud where Roode won the big gimmick match? Oh that would be because we can have a TRILOGY, and that’s the magic word in wrestling for some reason, even when there was no desire to see a second match.

After a break, Roode is being helped out and Young piledrives him on the stage. In case you didn’t know, Eric Young is CRAZY.

Here’s Al Snow, looking ancient. He’s been having issues with one of the students on British Boot Camp, which I’d assume has been seen by about 18 American fans. The fans in the arena certainly seem to know it though as they start chanting for Grado, one of the contestants on the most recent season. In Grado, Snow found someone else who thought he could do what Snow does but Grado was just another failure.

Snow gives Grado one more chance to come out here and quit before he has to give the student a beating next week. Grado comes out and looks like a cleaned up Louis Spicolli. Snow rips into him for a lack of respect and heart. He’s the heel here if that wasn’t clear. Grado takes the mic away and says Snow doesn’t realize where he is. They’re in Glasgow and the people here won’t take this from Snow. Grado’s mom is in the front row so Snow yells at her, causing Grado to nail him in the face. The fight is made for next week.

After the segment is over, I still have the same two questions I had before it started: who is Grado and why am I supposed to care about this feud? We first heard about Grado maybe two minutes before he appeared and were given a very basic backstory about him. I get that the fans live are going to like him, but if you don’t or can’t watch British Boot Camp, there’s a good chance you don’t know who this guy is. Show us some stuff from the show and give us a reason to care, because otherwise it’s the same as bringing in the ECW guys for shows in the northeast. If you didn’t care for ECW, you don’t care about that.

I don’t care about British Boot Camp, but it’s more because I haven’t been exposed to it. I’m not a fan of just expecting the fans to know what you’re talking about, especially when you can clear it up with a quick package or by giving us some information more than two minutes before the whole thing starts. It’s going to get some loud pops in the arena, but there are a lot more fans on the other side of the camera. I will give them this though: Snow did a great job at riling up a crowd like an old school talker can.

Craazy Steve vs. Bram

Bram pulls him out of the corner to start, sending Steve’s head into the buckle. He grabs the mic and says he wants Magnus, stomping at Steve’s head more every time. Steve’s comeback lasts as long as you would expect and an impaler DDT gives Bram the pin at 2:20.

JB says he can’t wrestle but Spud says they’re men and they’re going to be fine.

Gunner asks Angle if he’s sure about teaming with Lashley. Kurt knows he and Lashley are fighting one day and he wants the champ at his best.

Ethan Carter III/Tyrus vs. Rockstar Spud/Mandrews/Jeremy Borash

Carter, sporting a huge brace on his arm due to a recent surgery, is thinking this week and has cordless clippers to shave some hair. Spud gets right in Carter’s face but Tyrus comes in instead. That goes badly for Spud and Mandrews is thrown down as well so it’s time for JB vs. Carter. Ethan easily pounds Jeremy into the corner and it’s off to Mandrews to take the real beating. Tyrus plants him with the t-bone and now Carter comes in to pick the bones.

The announcers get off topic to talk about the main event tag as carter sends Mandrews face first into the mat. Mandrews fights out of a chinlock and hits an enziguri, allowing for the tag to Spud. Tyrus breaks up the Spud offense with a claw hold but accidentally splashes his boss. A Dudley Dog sends Tyrus to the floor and……Borash goes up top for a dive onto Tyrus! Borash looks dead after landing but still it looked good at the time. Back in and the 1%er is enough to pin Spud at 6:06.

Rating: C. Spud is rapidly growing on me as he keeps getting better and better in the ring and is nailing the Spike Dudley mold of fighting beyond his size. The dive from Borash was more cool than anything else and gave me a little smile. This story continues to live WAY beyond its means and is far more entertaining than it has any right to be. I know Spud is going to lose in the end, but man alive they’re making it fun along the way.

Carter and Tyrus go for the hair but the lights go out and Mr. Anderson appears to take out the heels.

Gunner says he’s ready for the gauntlet but gets beaten down by the BDC.

Here’s Madison to talk about something. Before she can really get going, she keeps getting interrupted by what sounds like a microphone being dropped and stepped on. She says she’s one title reign away from the all time record and no one can beat her. I think you know what’s coming.

Awesome Kong vs. Madison Rayne

Kong splashes her in the corner but misses one in the middle of the ring. That’s the extent of Madison’s luck as the Implant Buster ends her at 1:24.

Aries is in Angle’s locker room and says he tapped out because he has his eyes on the World Title. Angle doesn’t seem to care and again this seemed a bit worthless.

We look back at Jeff Hardy’s injury last week to keep him off the UK tour.

Cue Matt Hardy to give us an update on his brother’s condition. Jeff has taken a lot of risks over the years and given us memories that will last forever. Every time he’s been hurt before, Jeff has always been able to give Matt a little sign that he’s ok and will be back. Last week though, there was nothing from Jeff. This brings out the Revolution so Storm can say that Matt is right.

Storm did what Edge and Christian and Team 3D couldn’t do. Sting, Kurt Angle, Roode, Aries, Lashley or even the Undertaker couldn’t do what he did. He put Jeff Hardy down because heroes only exist because of villains. Matt has two options: join the Revolution or join his brother in the hospital. Matt says Jeff’s hospital bed is pretty nice and the beating is on. Manik puts him in a cross armbreaker and they go for the noose but the Wolves run out for the save.

Aries won’t say when he’s cashing in and gets attacked by the BDC. They even throw him out the door but are nice enough to throw him his briefcase. We actually get a replay of it not thirty seconds later. Apparently throwing him the briefcase is a way for the BDC to attack Lashley as much as they want without worrying about Aries. If they’re beating him down, wouldn’t they be able to see Aries coming? Or they could just, keep the briefcase if its presence is required.

Kurt Angle/Bobby Lashley vs. MVP/Samoa Joe

Ki and King are of course at ringside. Angle and Joe get things going after a break and they trade arm control to start. It’s quickly off to Lashley for a running shoulder to Joe’s ample gut and a hard clothesline. MVP bails from contact and Joe gets in some cheap shots to take over. It’s off to MVP for a running basement dropkick and that’s about it for the leader. Joe runs him over again and King gets in some choking from the floor. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Lashley throws Joe down, allowing for the tag off to Angle. It’s Germans time but the Angle Slam only gets two on Joe.

Everything breaks down and MVP sends Kurt shoulder first into the post for two. We settle down to MVP working over Angle before it’s back to Joe for a weak crossface chicken wing. Angle fights out and makes hot tag the sequel to Lashley. The big delayed vertical suplex drops MVP and a spinebuster gets two. Everything breaks down again and Lashley loads up the spear to Joe but Angle grabs the ankle lock. The distraction lets MVP roll up Lashley with a handful of trunks for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: B-. Nice main event style tag here and it’s clear that MVP is the next major challenger to the title before we get to Angle vs. Lashley in their big showdown. This feels a lot like Reigns vs. Bryan and it’s being done a bit better. It’s a nice three way feud, but MVP really doesn’t need a stable behind him to do this. Just have them all be guys instead of MVP running a group and let them have a feud. Still though, good enough.

Overall Rating: B. TNA is rolling right now and this was another good wrestling show. They’re setting up stories and seem to be paying them off. No it’s not perfect and there are some tweaks that need to be made, but I’m very pleased with what I’m getting at the moment. If nothing else, they’re not cramming 19 segments on one story into a show and are spreading things around a good bit. That being said, I’ve thought this before and TNA has managed to screw it up like no other. Hopefully it lasts a good while though as this has been very entertaining lately.

Results

Bobby Roode b. Austin Aries – Crossface

Bram b. Craazy Steve – Impaler DDT

Tyrus/Ethan Carter III b. Rockstar Spud/Mandrews/Jeremy Borash – 1%er to Spud

Awesome Kong b. Madison Rayne – Implant Buster

MVP/Samoa Joe b. Lashley/Kurt Angle – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – February 6, 2015: How To Book A Monster Face

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 6, 2015
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

As is going to be the case all year it seems, pay per view is no longer an option (save for One Night Only because who can forge that series) so for the first time ever, Lockdown is being offered as a free TV broadcast. The main event is Team Angle vs. the BDC with Angle’s team being down a man as Lashley turned down his offer to join. Let’s get to it.

The opening video starts off by focusing on the cage itself before shifting to Roode vs. Young and the Lethal Lockdown main event.

All matches are inside a cage.

Tag Team Titles: Hardys vs. James Storm/Abyss

Storm and Abyss are defending and it’s tornado rules. Matthews says he and Taz are ringside and then they’re shown in their studio in Nashville. So Matthews is a liar. Good to know. The Hardys start fast with Poetry in Motion to both guys but they have to stop to deal with the interfering Manik. They just happen to have a pair of handcuffs to tie him to the top rope but the distraction lets the champs take over. Matt and Jeff are sent into the cage over and over with Matt getting the worse of it as we take a break.

Back with Storm hitting a top rope elbow for two on Matt as frustration is starting to set in for the champions. The Hardys quickly fight back for a double two count but Matt misses a moonsault to Storm. Matt doesn’t seem to mind as he hits a top rope Twist of Fate to drop Storm. Khoya ignores the cage as well and pulls Matt through the camera hole to the floor, which doesn’t count as a win because it wasn’t over the top. Back inside, Jeff hits a Twist on Abyss but Sanada Mists him to break up the Swanton. Storm’s Last Call retains the titles at 13:36.

Rating: C. This was more of a spot fest than a coherent match but that’s what you have to expect for a tornado style match. It’s not that easy to get much of a story going without the need for tags and all those other people interfering in the match. Still though, it had enough big spots to open a show and it’s always good to see the Revolution get a win.

Post match the Revolution puts Matt through a table outside and sets up another in the ring. They unhook Mania, though where they got the key isn’t really clear. Manik misses a top rope splash through the table and Jeff fights off most of the Revolution and climbs up, only to get crotched on the cage door and knocked off onto the steps. This is Jeff’s annual “I can’t go to England” injury angle.

MVP has a special offer for Angle tonight. After a break, MVP, King and Young are in the ring with MVP talking about how dangerous this cage really is. They’re ready to face anyone who stands in their way tonight and Young promises to make Roode bleed tonight. Bobby is offered a chance to walk away but MVP switches to Angle. He wants Kurt to come out here and talk to him face to face for a proposal.

Cue Angle, Gunner and Aries as MVP talks about how all three can walk out of here (they just walked in here though) without getting beaten up again. MVP has talked to Angle’s doctor and that knee is being held together by tape and gum. Has this doctor never heard of privacy laws??? Angle and company say they’re not walking away and the brawl is on. Joe and Low Ki come out to give the BDC an advantage and they crush Gunner’s arm in the cage door. The Clan runs away instead of taking advantage of their numbers advantage.

Video on Havok and Kong dominating the company. I still don’t buy Havok as anywhere near Kong’s level after winning like five matches.

Gunner is checked on in the back but he insists he’s starting the match tonight.

Havok vs. Awesome Kong

They start fighting on the ramp with Kong getting the better of it but being sent into the steps. The bell rings before they’re even in the cage with Kong down on the floor. Kong fights out of the spinebuster slam and sends Havok into the steps for her efforts. The fans think this is better than the Divas, which really isn’t covering a lot of ground.

They finally get inside (the girls, not the fans, in case you’re really thick in the head) and ram heads before Havok kicks her down. It just seems to fire Kong up though and she no sells a chokeslam for good measure. A chokeslam puts Havok down and sets up the Awesome Splash for the pin at 5:48.

Rating: C+. This was better than I was expecting, even though the ending was exactly what I expected. There was no reason to think Havok could go toe to toe with Kong, especially given how short Havok’s run in TNA has been. She debuted what, four months ago, which includes the month they were off TV? Kong looked dominant though and that’s the right idea.

Video on Roode vs. Young. They have to have someone bleed in this.

From two weeks ago, Velvet told Angelina that she was fired and starts crying. Love hugs her and smiles at the news.

Lashley is told Angle is looking for him and the champ says he isn’t hard to find.

Eric Young vs. Bobby Roode

Pin or submission only. Roode runs him over to start but eats an elbow to the jaw. The fans already want blood as Eric sends Roode back first into the cage a few times. A belly to belly sets up a chinlock on Roode before a powerslam gets two. Cue MVP with a chair but Roode ducks a big swing. The piledriver is countered into a catapult to send Young into the cage and you can see Eric blade. I really shouldn’t like seeing him in pain this much.

The spinebuster gets two for Bobby and he puts Young on top. A super Roode Bomb is countered with a cage shot and Young’s top rope elbow gets two. Young loads up another elbow onto the chair but Roode gets up and blasts him in the back. The Roode Bomb onto a chair is good for the pin at 7:55.

Rating: D. Well that happened and I still don’t care. At the end of the day, Eric Young isn’t interesting, intimidating, tough, worthy of being in a major story or anything positive that I can think of. This “12 years thrown away” story made my head hurt as these two barely associated for years and the whole “Roode owns Young and makes his life miserable” period is conveniently forgotten. Just get Young back to the comedy jobber guy he’s been for years so I don’t have to put up with this any longer.

Lashley turns Angle down again so Kurt throws him against the wall and tells him to wake up.

The announcers debate the upcoming Top 5.

Mandrews/Rockstar Spud vs. Tyrus

Tyrus easily shrugs off a double teaming to start and shoves both guys into corners. A double Tongan Death Grip has them in trouble but they come back with a double dropkick to the face and then more to the chest. An enziguri is good for one but Spud escapes a powerbomb and climbs all the way to the top of the cage. With a middle finger to Carter, Spud hits a HUGE flip dive to take Tyrus down and Ethan is stunned.

Carter gets up and spits at Mandrews, tricking him into coming out of the cage. Carter trips him up on the way out, sending Mandrews’ head into the steps to make this one on one. Spud is distracted from covering and gets the cage door slammed on his head, setting up a Tongan slam and Asiatic Spike to the neck for the pin on Spud at 5:44.

Rating: C. That big flip and Carter’s facials make this match work better, even though Mandrews really didn’t need to be in the match. I’m digging this feud way more than I was expecting to and I’m actually believing Spud could pull off the upset and beat Carter, even though that wouldn’t make a ton of sense.

Carter goes to shave Spud’s head but JB unplugs his clippers.

We look at Hardy being hurt “moments ago” and say there’s no update.

Roode talks about the fifteen years he’s known Eric and says he made Young bleed, just like he promised. They were best friends but now it’s all gone and it’s time to move on.

Earlier tonight, Robbie E. challenged Brooke to a competition to determine who lost the Amazing Race. They had a dizzy bat challenge before climbing the cage and getting back out with the winner crossing a finish line. Robbie almost won but spent too much time taking a picture, allowing Brooke to hit him low and win. This was heavily clipped instead of showing the full thing.

Team Angle vs. Beat Down Clan

Kurt Angle, Gunner, Austin Aries, ???

MVP, Kenny King, Samoa Joe, Low Ki

Lethal Lockdown, meaning two men start for two minutes and then a team (determined by a coin toss) gets to send in its second man. After two minutes the team that lost the coin toss gets to send in its second man to tie things up for two minutes. The teams continue to alternate until all participants are in when it’s first pinfall or submission wins. There are weapons provided inside the cage for the duration of the match this year, as opposed to them not coming down until the last man enters in previous editions.

King and Gunner get things going with Kenny going after the injured arm. Gunner whips him into the cage and blasts him in the back of the head with a trashcan lid to keep King in trouble. He chokes King with a nightstick but Low Ki comes in to make it 2-1. They’re already going quickly through this match.A big trashcan lid shot to Gunner’s head gives the BDC control and King holds him for kicks to the chest. The beating continues until Austin Aries comes in for the tie. Austin immediately starts speeding things up and blasts King in the ribs with the nightstick.

Gunner opts for a tennis racket (cue the Jim Cornette reference from Taz) but it’s Samoa Joe to give the BDC another advantage. More weapons shots have Team Angle in trouble as this is getting very repetitive, just like almost all Lethal Lockdown matches. Angle ties it up again and takes a hockey stick to his ribs upon entry. Kurt doesn’t seem to mind and German suplexes Joe before rolling Kenny up out of instinct. Team Angle gets beaten down with more weapons shots until MVP completes the BDC.

Pins and submissions are allowed now as all the announced wrestlers are in. Back from a break with the BDC destroying everyone in sight with quadruple teaming. Angle finally gets back up and blasts them with the trashcan lid. The comeback is short lived though as the BDC destroys them again….and here’s Lashley. This would be more exciting if TNA hadn’t shown him appearing four times now in their previews for next week.

He extends his hand to MVP but doesn’t let go, pulling the leader into a clothesline. Lashley cleans house but gets taken down into the corner and choked out by MVP. Angle counters Joe’s Muscle Buster into the ankle lock as Gunner Gun Racks King and Aries puts Ki in the Last Chancery. Lashley spears MVP down for the pin at 20:23.

Rating: C+. Bobby Lashley is exactly what Roman Reigns should be. He’s big, he’s strong, he runs through people, and he barely ever speaks because his actions do all his talking for him. I’ve had a lot of fun watching Lashley break people in half over the last few months and he’s far more entertaining than Reigns more often than not. Put Reigns on a roll like this and build it as a clash of the titans against Lesnar and I’d want to see it. Some guys just don’t need to have a really detailed character and both Lashley and Reigns fit that mold.

The rest of the match was just there and followed the format of almost every single Lethal Lockdown match in history, minus the big spot on top. You knew it wasn’t going to really crank up until the end of the match which makes the first seventeen minutes or so pretty dull stuff. I can only see a trashcan lid to the back of the head to change momentum so many times.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s a decent enough show but as usual, most of these matches don’t need to be inside a cage. This is very similar to the Elimination Chamber or Hell in a Cell PPV: the calendar alone said these matches had to be in cages and there really wasn’t a reason for a lot of them to be under these rules. Look at Kong vs. Havok and see that the cage didn’t change a thing. The Hardy bump could have been done off the top rope for the same ending and Spud could have hit the same move off the top rope. Only the main event required a cage and it didn’t really change much. Decent show but not necessary.

Results

James Storm/Abyss b. Hardys – Last Call to Jeff

Awesome Kong b. Havok – Awesome Splash

Bobby Roode b. Eric Young – Roode Bomb onto a chair

Tyrus b. Mandrews/Rockstar Spud – Asiatic Spike to Spud

Team Angle b. Beat Down Clan – Spear to MVP

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – January 30, 2015: The Fastest PPV Build Of All Time

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 30, 2015
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

The World Title picture is starting to pick up again as Bobby Roode, Kurt Angle, Austin Aries and MVP all have their eyes on Lashley’s title. It’s hard to say what’s coming up next week at Lockdown as nothing has been announced yet. You can guess what some of those matches will be but the main event hasn’t been set in stone so far. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look back at MVP taking Lashley’s title belt after a brawl.

Here’s Bobby Roode with Lashley’s title, which he picked up on the street after chasing off the BDC, to open the show. Roode talks about how he wishes this title belonged to him but it doesn’t right now. It was stolen from him a few weeks ago and he’s going to get his hands on Eric Young to pay him back for what he did.

As for the title, the only two people with a claim to it are he and Lashley, so here’s the real champ to get his belt back. Roode says this title belongs to Lashley but he wants a rematch tonight. Lashley agrees and starts to walk away but Roode asks why wait. This brings out Austin Aries with his Feast or Fired briefcase. Do you remember wrestling before briefcases? I miss those days. The fans are pleased to see him (Aries: “You know my name!”) and he thinks he should cash in his briefcase here in New York City.

He isn’t sure if he should do it now or wait until later on after these two have fought. This brings out MVP who says he’s disappointed in Lashley for saying the title is his. That title belongs the BDC and MVP wants to fight Lashley for the title right now. Lashley tells Aries to hold onto the briefcase for now, because he’ll fight all three of them for the title tonight. This would be yet another major match announced with next to no build that could have been the culmination of about five weeks instead of fifteen minutes.

A voiceover announces Team Angle vs. Team BDC next week in Lethal Lockdown. The clips show who will be in the match. Well that’s one way to set up one of the biggest matches of the year.

Angle says he’ll assemble his team tonight and know who is fighting in Lethal Lockdown next week. And it might be surprising if you tuned back in from commercial thirty seconds late.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell

One fall to a finish and Taryn is defending. We get some stills of Will Ferrell hitting her in the face with a basketball in a scene from Ferrell’s new movie. It’s a fast start with Taryn going for a fast pin before hair dragging Gail down. She misses a charge into the corner and gets hit with a running cross body to the ribs as Madison is on the floor. Madison comes back in and gets suplexed for two but elbows Taryn in the jaw for the same.

Gail runs back in and gets caught in a neckbreaker (called a Diamond Cutter by Josh) from Madison at the same time Rayne catches Taryn in a DDT. Kim takes Madison down in something like Konnan’s Tequila Sunrise but she pulls forward on the leg instead of backwards like a half crab. That’s quite a different version and looked good at the same time.

The champ breaks it up by adding a dragon sleeper to Kim and all three head to the floor. Madison flapjacks Terrell onto the steps and sends both girls face first onto them for good measure. They head back inside with Madison escaping Eat Defeat and avoiding a cross body, only to walk into an RKO to retain Taryn’s title at 6:00.

Rating: B-. This was far better than I was expecting as they didn’t stop for a second in the whole match. Making Taryn the fighting champion who goes up against anyone she can is a good way to get her over and the fans seem to be responding to her. They still need some fresh blood in the division and Kong would be a good option.

Announced for Lockdown next week: Havok vs. Awesome Kong and Abyss/James Storm vs. the Hardys for the Tag Team Titles.

Magnus is walking the street and says he and Bram are going to have a drink and talk about their problems.

Rockstar Spud is showing Mark Andrews around New York City but doesn’t quite know the names of some landmarks (the Empire State Building is the Washington Monument for example). The point is they’re challenging Tyrus and Ethan Carter III for a tag match tonight.

Here’s Tommy Dreamer to say he hasn’t lied to the fans in 25 years and he isn’t going to tonight. He calls out Eric Young to say something to his face. Oh good grief seriously? These two together is what I get for watching these guys for years??? Young says this isn’t Dreamer’s business but Dreamer talks about his history with Roode and Young in TNA. Tommy has watched him go from a nothing joke to the World Champion.

He tells Young not to turn his back and burn bridges with Roode or the fans. Eric: “You’re a fat loser from this dump.” He wants to blow the bridge up so Tommy takes his jacket off. Tommy says this is all about a title shot, but did Young ever ask Roode for a shot? That earns Dreamer a piledriver but Roode comes out for the save.

The Hardys are ready for their title shot next week but Jeff has a Monster’s Ball match with Abyss first. He’s brought some friends named kendo, cookie and barbed wire.

Magnus goes into a bar and finds Bram.

Kurt Angle goes into Gunner’s locker room and asks him to be in Lethal Lockdown next week. Gunner isn’t sure so Angle slaps him in the face.

Magnus and Bram are in the bar where Bram says that briefcase was his. Magnus points out that he won a Tag Team Title shot and who else is going to be his partner? It’s Bram’s temper that has held him back over the years and he’s gotten Bram a job here. They’re not 18 years old anymore and they can’t just get in fights when they don’t get their way. This is about Magnus’ family and putting a roof over his son’s head and food on his table.

Bram asks to see a picture of Magnus’ son and says he has Magnus’ eyes. They toast to their future and leave. Bram shows Magnus the way out and says he’ll handle the bill. Magnus realizes he’s in a dead end and Bram jumps him from behind, ramming Magnus into a few doors and punching him in the back of the head. This actually worked really well.

Josh and Taz discuss what Bram just did.

Jeff Hardy vs. Abyss

This is Monster’s Ball and they’re shown fighting in the back before coming into the arena for the opening bell. Jeff is in control early and rams Abyss into whatever he can as they get down to ringside. He takes too long to set up a table though and gets kicked away, allowing Abyss to start loading up weapons in the ring. That takes too long as well though and Jeff hits a running forearm and basement dropkick for two.

The Twisting Stunner sends Abyss into the corner for Poetry in Motion (chair instead of Matt), knocking the monster out to the floor. Jeff tries a dive but crashes through the table to change momentum. Abyss brings in the tacks but takes a cheese grater between the legs. He’s still able to sidestep a charging Jeff though and sends him face first into the chair wedged in the corner. That was one heck of a crash. Is it any wonder Jeff is such a mess? It’s Janice time but as always it gets stuck in the buckle, allowing Jeff to hit the Twist of Fate but the Revolution comes in.

Cue Matt Hardy to cane everyone he can but Storm cracks him with a trashcan. The Last Call knocks Matt out but the Wolves come in for another save. Double suicide dives take out the rest of the Revolution but Abyss pours out the tacks. He takes too long with it again though and Jeff sunset bombs him onto the tacks, setting up the Swanton for the pin at 9:06.

Rating: C-. You know, if I remember right, these two had the exact same match with the exact same ending whenever they last did this match. I’m completely over Monster’s Ball as it’s nothing interesting anymore and is just the same weapons spots with the same guy (as Josh said, Abyss has been in 95% of the Monster’s Ball matches. Even if that’s not true, it certainly seems like it). It was passable, but by this point there’s nothing interesting in these things.

Storm is mad at Abyss for losing. I really hope they’re not teasing a split already.

Matt says he’ll always have his brother’s back.

We recap the fourway being set up.

Aries appreciates Lashley being a fighting champion and implies he’s cashing in if he loses.

Rockstar Spud/Mandrews vs. Ethan Carter III/Tyrus

Yes his name is Mandrews because there are no British wrestlers who aren’t skinny guys with bleached blond hair. Carter comes out and says the request for this match is denied. However, they have a replacement.

Rockstar Spud/Mandrews vs. BroMans

Yes his name is still Mandrews because wrestling names make my soul hurt. The BroMans jump Andrews to start and plant him face first, drawing in Spud so the BroMans can hit a double knee to the head. Robbie charges into a boot in the corner and the hot tag brings in Spud for some kicks to the leg and punches to the jaw. A double crotch claw has the BroMans in trouble and he takes off the bowtie, setting up a Dudley Dog on Robbie and a Shooting Star from Andrews is good for the pin at 2:39.

Robbie jumps Spud post match and sets up Andrews/Spud vs. Tyrus in a cage next week.

After a break Spud goes on a rampage about how he’s going to get Ethan because he isn’t a loser.

The announcers preview Lockdown.

TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Austin Aries vs. Bobby Roode vs. MVP

Lashley is defending and this is one fall to a finish. MVP bails to the floor but Roode and Aries force him back inside. He realizes what that means and tries to fight Lashley, only to get punched by all three guys. Everyone pairs off with Lashley stomping Roode in the corner but Roode comes back with a Blockbuster. He gets to his feet and eats Aries’ missile dropkick but Roode sends Austin to the floor. MVP goes after Roode’s knee but charges into a spinebuster to leave Roode as the only man standing as we take a break.

Back with Lashley powerslamming Roode for two with Aries making another save. Lashley powers out of a brainbuster attempt but gets low bridged out to the floor, setting up Aries’ suicide dive. MVP hits his running boot to Roode’s jaw, followed by an exploder suplex for two. Here’s a sign of things changing in TNA: Taz started stumbling over all the three letter names involved in the match (it happens), made a quick joke about it, and got right back to commentary. If this was still he and Tenay, they would still be making fun of it ten minutes later.

The Ballin Elbow gets two on Roode but Lashley comes back in with a Dominator to MVP, sending him to the floor. Aries nails a top rope ax handle to deck MVP again before Roode puts MVP in the Crossface. This time it’s the champ making the save and a Tower of Doom sends everyone not named MVP down. Cue Eric Young with a chair to Roode, leaving Aries to counter the spear into the Last Chancery. MVP breaks it up but gets sent to the floor with a discus forearm. Aries loads up a dive but gets speared in half to retain Lashley’s title at 13:11.

Rating: B-. Fun match here but I would have liked to see it go on longer. Lashley retaining here is a good sign as they’re clearly going with Lashley vs. the BDC for the next few weeks if not months and that should have some interesting stories. I’m still not as high on MVP as a lot of people are but he did fine here. As usual, Aries stole the show.

The BDC and Young (again, why is he not a member?) comes in post match but Angle and Gunner make the save.

After a break, everyone is still at ringside. Roode challenges Young to a cage match next week and the challenge is accepted because Roode wants to make him bleed. Aries comes in with his briefcase and says he should be on Team Angle next week. Angle accepts and now it’s Lashley’s turn. Kurt asks him to join the team so he doesn’t have to deal with MVP for the rest of his career. Lashley turns him down and walks away to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I really liked the show this week, even though they had to fly through everything to set up Lockdown in a hurry. The wrestling, when it actually happened, was good for the most part and they kept things moving fast. This was about setting up stuff for the future and they accomplished that quite well, with some decent wrestling to go with it. Solid show this week and their best since they’ve been on Destination America.

Results

Taryn Terrell b. Gail Kim and Madison Rayne – RKO to Rayne

Jeff Hardy b. Abyss – Swanton Bomb

Rockstar Spud/Mandrews b. BroMans

Lashley b. Bobby Roode, Austin Aries and MVP – Spear to Aries

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Impact Wrestling – January 23, 2015: The Fastest Two Hours In Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 23, 2015
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Tazz, Josh Matthews

The big story tonight is Feast or Fired, TNA’s big Money in the Bank style match with three potential title shots up for grabs, plus a lone pink slip. This is usually a huge mess but the fallout can change a lot of things going forward. The other situation is the Beat Down Clan walking off with Lashley’s World Title. Let’s get to it.

Feast or Fired

Davey Richards, Eddie Edwards, Samuel Shaw, Magnus, Bram, Rockstar Spud, Austin Aries, Robbie E., Jesse Godderz, DJZ, Gunner, Crazzy Steve

It’s a ladder match with briefcases hanging over every corner. Only four people win and everyone else walks away with nothing, which isn’t the worst outcome. The lights are very low again, likely covering up the low attendance. Again, this is in New York City. There really shouldn’t be an excuse to not draw a thousand people to a wrestling show, assuming the tickets aren’t outrageous.

The match is a huge brawl to start and Steve goes for an early briefcase, only to have Velvet Sky offer a distraction to break it up. She winds up going up and getting a case for Robbie, meaning he gets to leave early. Steve chases Robbie and the Beautiful People off to clear out the ring a bit. Spud goes up but isn’t tall enough to grab the case. Everyone but Shaw and Spud fight to the floor but Gunner pops back in to crotch Shaw. Aries dropkicks Gunner in the back of the head, only to be sent to the floor by Spud. Using Gunner as a platform, Spud climbs up and pulls down a case.

Robbie E. knocks Aries down again but stops to get a kiss from Angelina, allowing the Wolves to kick him down. The Wolves load up a dive but stop due to an Angelina distraction. Aries has the ring to himself and takes down the third briefcase, THEN hits the dive to take everyone out. Bram and Gunner get back in for a brawl on the pole but it’s Magnus powerbombing both guys down, leaving Magnus to take down the last case at 7:41. Bram isn’t pleased with Magnus taking the case.

Rating: D+. I’m sorry for all the play by play in this but there’s almost nothing else to do in one of these things. It’s almost all about the aftermath and if you’re lucky enough to get something fun in the middle like Spud climbing up onto Shaw’s back then so be it. There just wasn’t much to see here but there rarely is in Feast or Fired.

Lashley is coming to the ring.

Magnus says the pressure is on with the case when Bram comes up and says that was his. Magnus isn’t impressed and says calm down because he got Bram his job here. Security has to break them up. You knew this split was coming eventually and it makes perfect sense.

We look back at the BDC beating Lashley down and leaving with the title last week.

A bandaged Lashley calls out the Beat Down Clan to bring him his title. He gets Kenny King minus the belt, who says Lashley is too ungrateful to make it in the BDC. Lashley couldn’t beat Roode without the BDC, where everyone is a potential World Champion. Without blinking, Lashley still wants his title. King says get a referee out here but doesn’t want to wrestle in front of a bunch of people who won’t appreciate him. Cue the BDC to surround the ring for the match.

Kenny King vs. Lashley

Non-title and Lashley is wrestling in an American Top Team (his MMA team) shirt. King hammers away in the corner to start but Lashley throws him down with a delayed vertical suplex and takes off the shirt. Kenny misses a springboard and gets speared down, drawing in the BDC for the DQ at 2:37.

MVP says if Lashley wants his title, come get it in the streets.

Havok vs. Gail Kim

Gail jumps her in the aisle to start and hits a nice cross body off the apron. They head inside for the bell with Havok taking her down in the corner and driving forearms in the corner. Some kicks don’t get Kim anywhere and a bearhug spinebuster gets two for Havok. A hard running knee to the face knocks Gail silly and she’s holding her eye. The announcers say this is a message to Awesome Kong, which would be better than Havok’s current resume. The referee calls Havok off but gets shoved down, drawing the DQ at 4:06. Total destruction otherwise.

Rating: C-. Well they accomplished the goal of making Havok look like a monster, but I’m still not interested in seeing her vs. Kong. At the end of the day, Havok has only been around a few months and probably lost almost as many matches as she has won. It just doesn’t add up to the year plus of dominance for Kong.

Post match Havok grabs Kim by the throat but here’s Kong for the showdown. Havok’s forearm has no effect and Kong clotheslines her to the floor.

We recap Ethan Carter III challenging Jeremy Borash to fight him last week.

Tigre Uno vs. Khoya

This is Khoya’s debut as part of the Revolution. Tigre kicks at the legs to start, drawing Storm up to the apron to slap him in the face. It fires Khoya up to hit a bad looking fall away slam, followed by a Sky High for the pin at 1:04.

Storm says he’ll be facing Matt Hardy tonight and he’s stronger than any demon Jeff has ever faced. He’s stronger than any pill Jeff has taken and any bottle he’s ever drank. There’s always room for one more in the Revolution. That’s quite the promo.

Roode comes in to see Angle and says he doesn’t care about their tag match tonight because he wants Eric Young one on one. Angle says Roode has to focus to win the title back, because if he goes in alone, he’s going to lose. I’m having a hard time getting behind the idea of Roode vs. Young again when Young beat him in the big showdown last week. But hey, why build to a match when you can have it with no build, right TNA?

We recap Eric Young vs. Bobby Roode with Josh saying they’ve been best friends for twelve years. That’s some creative history to put it mildly.

Very quick recap of Feast or Fired.

Spud says he used to be a gopher and now he feels like he’s moved forward in his career. Even if he’s fired, he’s going to punch Ethan Carter right in the face, but it’s worth the gamble.

Eric Young/Low Ki vs. Kurt Angle/Bobby Roode

Angle and Low Ki get things going in a match that might never have taken place before. Ki gets taken down to the match and it’s off to Roode vs. Young. Josh tries to figure out the relationship between Young and the BDC, asking the same question I’ve had: if he has the same enemies and associates and teams with the BDC, why don’t they just add him to the team? Low Ki comes back in and hammers away in the corner for two but gets caught in a superplex, allowing for the hot tag to Angle.

Everything breaks down and the Angle Slam plants Low Ki, setting up the ankle lock but Eric makes the save. Roode puts Low Ki in the crossface but Angle brings in a chair. Joe and MVP come out on the stage for a staredown, allowing Roode to break up the hold with another chair, giving Low Ki the pin at 5:11. Our heroes ladies and gentlemen.

Rating: D. This didn’t have time to go anywhere because we have to get 194 other things in on every episode. However, the faces lose again because that’s what happens in TNA. It’s the same story we’ve gone through time after time now, leading up to what is probably going to be a long, drawn out story of the faces being downtrodden until someone rises up to win a single big match, leading to the heel stable implode over several months. How do I know this? Well seeing it a dozen or so times with almost nothing changes gives you a good idea.

MVP is outside the arena on the street, telling Lashley to come and get his title.

We recap Rockstar Spud splitting from Ethan Carter III and Jeremy Borash being dragged into it by saying he supports Spud.

Ethan Carter III vs. Jeremy Borash

Carter introduces himself because he’s fighting the announcer. JB comes out with Spud and shakes hands with Mark Andrews, the winner of British Boot Camp 2. Carter still has the mic in his hand and does commentary for the match. Borash finally shoves him away and takes the mic. The fans like to tell Carter that he can’t wrestle, but he can’t announce either.

Borash actually nails Carter in the jaw and knocks him into the corner, only to get taken down with a tackle. The beating is on but Carter yells at Spud, drawing in both Spud and Tyrus with the big man dropping him with a heart punch. Andrews comes in with a springboard dropkick as the match is thrown out at about 2:00.

A double dropkick puts Tyrus on the floor and Andrews hits a nice shooting star to take everyone out.

Matt Hardy vs. James Storm

Matt hits a quick running clothesline in the corner to start and they’re quickly on the ramp. Hardy stays on offense by sending Storm into the steps over and over, followed by an elbow from the apron to the back. Back in and Storm puts him on the middle rope for a Backstabber (now called the Lung Blower) to take over. A quick Side Effect gets two for Hardy as the darkness over the crowd is even more noticeable than before. The people there are making noise but the visual is horrible. Closing Time sets up the Last Call but Matt ducks and counters the Eye of the Storm into a small package for the pin at 5:17.

Rating: D+. This really didn’t do anything for me and felt like they were just doing moves to each other until one of them won. I’m really not caring to see Hardys vs. Revolution, but then again I’m not wild on Storm as a Tag Team Champion again. At least it’s better than some of the stupid teams they could have had.

Post match Hardy turns down a handshake offer, drawing in Abyss to help Storm hit a Last Call. Abyss gets out Janice but Jeff Hardy makes the save with a chair. Jeff challenges Abyss for Monster’s Ball next week. Again?

A preview for next week shows Lashley with the title in a pretty big spoiler.

Samoa Joe comes up to MVP on the street but MVP says he has this.

It’s time for the reveal of the briefcases. There’s a World, Tag Team and X-Division Title match and a pink slip. Robbie E. has a camera on a stick to record himself and Velvet Sky’s every move. Rockstar Spud goes first and has…..an X-Division Title shot. Magnus’ case contains…..a Tag Team Title shot. So it’s Robbie E. or Austin Aries with the pink slip or World Title shot.

Back from a break with Aries getting in a Stuart Scott reference by saying he feels as cool as the other side of the pillow. Robbie points out that Velvet Sky grabbed the case and has the footage to prove it. In other words, the case belongs to her. As luck would have it, Velvet is the one getting fired, meaning Aries gets the World Title shot. Robbie gets on the table and dances, shouting that he still has a job, leaving Velvet in tears.

Lashley goes outside and beats up MVP on the street. MVP punches him back and they head inside, likely to avoid getting arrested. The rest of the BDC jumps Lashley and beat him back outside until Roode and Angle make the save with a pipe. Roode picks up the belt and stares at it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show goes by so fast that it’s hard to tell if it’s good or not. They keep it moving so fast that it’s almost impossible to remember everything that happens, but as usual they’re flying through almost everything they have in a week or two. It’s not a bad show, but they really need to slow down instead of just burning through everything they have. For instance, Lockdown is in two weeks and while you can see most of the card coming from here, the show hasn’t even been mentioned yet because we have to get everything else in. Decent enough show this week but it’s typical TNA.

Results

Magnus, Rockstar Spud, Austin Aries and Robbie E. won Feast or Fired

Lashley b. Kenny King via DQ when the BDC interfered

Gail Kim b. Havok via DQ when Havok shoved the referee

Khoya b. Tigre Uno – Sky High

Eric Young/Low Ki b. Kurt Angle/Bobby Roode – Ki pinned Roode after a chair shot from Young

Ethan Carter III vs. Jeremy Borash went to a no contest

Matt Hardy b. James Storm – Small package

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – January 16, 2015: Here We Go Again

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 16, 2015
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Taz

This is the debut on Fridays which will be their regular night. The big story coming out of last week is Lashley taking the World Title back from Bobby Roode and what appeared to be the formation of another heel stable as Eric Young turned on Roode and seemed to join forces with MVP, Kenny King, Samoa Joe and Low Ki. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s four title matches with Aries and Lashley winning the X-Division and World Titles respectfully.

Josh is in the control room and says we’re going to see this show in a way we’ve never seen before. It’s going to be more interactive and behind the scenes than ever before. Taz thinks the idea sounds cool. The two of them will be in various locations throughout the night.

Roode says nothing is more important than the title and Eric Young cost him the belt last week. He doesn’t know why, but he wants Eric Young one on one tonight. They kept this simple and Roode sold the intensity very well.

Here are MVP, Joe, Low Ki, King and a woman I don’t recognize. Taz and Josh are in a booth and are shown on a split screen. MVP says you can’t keep a good man down and after a quick lane changes, he’s right back in the driver’s seat. He’s always known it was him against the world since the day he started wrestling. He knew he had to surround himself with people he knew, so he went to the family. These men traveled the roads with him 500 miles a day for a hot dog and a handshake. They are known as the Beat Down Clan and they’re “nobody to F….mess with.”

MVP introduces Young but emphasizes that he is not part of the BDC. The fans tell Eric that he sold out, but he’s all serious and says that doesn’t matter. Young, with a haircut, says MVP did something for his family that made Eric change his opinion. Eric had a brother once. He took care of Roode and even gave him one of the first title shots. Where was his title shot when Roode won the belt? Maybe Roode was afraid of losing again, because Young is a world class man and friend. When Young was laid up, he only got a text message from Roode, but MVP called him up and told him the truth.

MVP says he planted a seed in Young and it grew to a sequoia. Now it’s time for the World Champ, but Lashley doesn’t come out to his music. MVP introduces him again but gets Kurt Angle in wrestling gear, sporting a big knee brace. He says Young is going to pay for his sins tonight when Roode gets his hands on him. Angle promises to make every one of them tap. Joe gets out of the ring and gets right in Kurt’s face but gets a punch to the jaw. The entire BDC gets in his face but security breaks it up. Angle wants Joe right now and apparently that’s good enough.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

This is joined in progress after a break with Joe working on the knee and slapping on a leg bar. He switches it up to something like a figure four as we go split screen to see a producer trying to find Lashley but there’s no one in his dressing room. Angle escapes the hold and starts rolling the Germans. Joe shrugs it off and hits the corner enziguri, only to have the Clutch countered into the ankle lock. That’s quickly escaped as well but the Angle Slam (what knee injury?) gets two. There’s the ankle lock again but this time the roll through takes out the referee. A low blow sets up the Clutch and Angle taps at 6:15 shown.

Rating: C-. It really amazes me how fast TNA can go from establishing a new hero (well as new as Angle can be) to having him lose in the middle of the ring. No it wasn’t clean, but couldn’t they have made this wait a bit longer? TNA seems terrified of the idea of building up a hero and this felt like even more of the same for yet another heel stable.

The BDC comes in to beat down Angle but Roode makes the save with a chair.

Back from a break with Roode sitting in the ring in the chair. He says this has already gone too far, which the fans agree with due to their ROODE GOT SCREWED chant. He’s been here a long time and this ring is his home. Roode may live for wrestling, but tonight in New York City, this is about payback. Another short but intense promo from Roode.

Taz and Matthews are in the booth again to talk about Impact: Unlocked tomorrow morning about 10am. This is a behind the scenes look at TNA, including power rankings and special features like this. We see an interview with Magnus, talking about doing this to provide for his family. His son looks up at him and he wants to make him proud. Another clip says he’d be fine with being a free agent in a market like this.

We look at JB getting his hair shaved last week.

Spud apologizes to JB but Borash isn’t really upset. He knows Carter will get what’s coming to him one day.

The Revolution is in a balcony to watch the next match.

Hardys vs. Wolves

Winners get a title shot against the Revolution. Matt and Eddie get things going with the Hardys quickly taking over, allowing for a tag to Jeff (big reaction). A nice headscissors takes Davey down and a double belly to back suplex gets two. The Hardys hit clotheslines from either side but everything breaks down and the Wolves send both Hardys into opposite corners with Matt getting tied in the Tree of Woe.

A drop toehold from Eddie sets up an elbow to the back from Davey for two. Davey fires off the kicks in the corner but misses the top rope stomp, allowing Matt to hit the Side Effect. It’s off to Jeff vs. Eddie as everything breaks down again. The Wolves throw Matt to the floor but he DDTs both guys down. Jeff is next to a different corner so he walks across the top rope (think Old School or Elix Skipper’s cage walk) to get to the other corner and dive on everyone else.

Back in and the Swanton hits Eddie’s knees and ReDRagon’s Chasing the Dragon (with a Falcon’s Arrow instead of a brainbuster) gets two on Jeff. The Hardys make a blind tag and Eddie takes another Side Effect. Jeff gets crotched on top and Eddie hits a Twist of Fate for two but Jeff Swantons in for the save. Poetry in Motion hits Eddie and the Twisting Stunner sets up an elevated Twisting Stunner for the pin at 10:00.

Rating: B. This was really entertaining and good if you don’t mind your tag match having almost no tagging. It got a lot better near the end but I could go for other teams besides the Hardys getting title shots. I can live with it though as long as it doesn’t lead to Jeff vs. Matt again.

Next week is Feast or Fired and Bram says he’s going to feast.

Eric Young is worried about Roode coming for revenge.

Ethan Carter III and Tyrus take over the production booth. Carter: “Ground control to major bald please.” They want the cameras on Jeremy Borash and we see his mostly bald head. Carter knows JB thinks he’s Heisenberg and tough now, so how about they have a match next week. JB has thirty minutes to decide.

Lashley has arrived.

Bobby Roode vs. Eric Young

No DQ and it’s a brawl in the aisle to start. Taz sums up the feud in simple terms: “The guy in the green screwed over the guy in the black and the guy in the black is ticked.” Back from a break with the fight in the crowd and a split screen showing Lashley going into his dressing room with no comment. Young takes it back to ringside and stomps on Roode’s head before chopping him against the barricade. Eric Young just looking all stoic doesn’t make me care about him TNA.

More forearms stop Roode’s comeback attempt, because Heaven forbid a good guy gets the crowd going. Two chairs are brought in and Young puts one in the corner. Back in and Roode fires off some right hands before nailing a nice spinebuster. The Roode Bomb onto a chair is countered and Young sends him head first into the corner chair. A piledriver onto the chair is enough to pin Roode at 10:11.

Rating: C. I could barely see a good chunk of the match but more importantly, TNA WILL YOU FREAKING LET A HERO LAST MORE THAN A FEW WEEKS??? Stop turning everything over to the heels over and over and over and over and over. It’s been nearly thirteen years of this same stuff and it’s gotten them onto the same network as Bathroom Kings (yes that’s really a show). Is a hero that doesn’t have to job to Eric Young so much to ask for?

MVP comes out and says maybe someone will visit Roode in the hospital.

Aries says it’s a battle to keep his X-Division Title tonight. If you back him into a corner, he’s going to get really dangerous.

We recap last week’s battle royal with Awesome Kong returning for the showdown with Havok. Again, Havok winning like five matches doesn’t make her Kong’s equal.

Brooke is mad about what Robbie said after how he performed on the Amazing Race.

Brooke Adams/Taryn Terrell vs. Beautiful People

All three BroMans are at ringside. DJZ takes a quick picture and we instantly see it on screen. He’s no Tyler Breeze. Adams hammers away on Angelina to start before taking Velvet down by the arm. Terrell comes in for a suplex and the Beautiful People are “dropkicked” to the outside, setting up Taryn’s bit dive to take out everyone on the floor. Back in and a middle rope clothesline drops Velvet, but Robbie gets on the apron to distract Brooke, letting Velvet grab a rollup with a handful of trunks for the pin at 2:30.

Post match Kong appears to destroys the Beautiful People and DJZ. Havok comes out for the showdown but security breaks it up.

JB turns down Carter’s challenge but Carter says JB is TNA. He should take the challenge because no one respect him. JB snaps and says he’ll fight Ethan next week.

Taz and Josh are going to preview something for next week. I’m not sure about this studio thing as it makes me feel like I’m watching a recap show. It’s not bad but it’s going to take some getting used to.

Manik tells a camera to follow him. They go to see James Storm, who tells Manik to leave them. Storm says it’s time for the world to be introduced to his newest disciple: Koya (formerly Mahabali Shera). Koya means lost in Hindi, but now Koya has been found. Next week, the world will see what he is capable of. The guy looks good if nothing else.

Video on Feast or Fired. It’s something like Money in the Bank with four briefcases, one for a shot at every title (other than the Knockouts) and one with a pink slip.

X-Division Title: Low Ki vs. Austin Aries

The BDC is at ringside. Aries took the title from Low Ki last week. The champ starts fast by backdropping Low Ki over the top but Ki’s feet get caught in the ropes to make the crash even worse. Back in and Aries gets two off the Pendulum Elbow and the Last Chancery sends Ki running for the ropes. Low Ki bails to the floor for a breather and meeting with the BDC. Why not just have them interfere now to give Ki the title? You know it’s coming because they’re a heel stable and therefore they have to win titles.

The advice works as Aries’ suplex is countered with Low Ki dropping him over the ropes. A big chop gets two but also ticks Aries off, causing him to fire off even harder chops of his own. The discus forearm sets up the running corner dropkick, but Ki knees out of the brainbuster. Austin crushes the knee and hooks the Last Chancery, only to have the BDC get on the apron. The referee misses Ki tapping out and the BDC gets on the apron, with MVP crotching Aries. Ki gets up and Ki Crushes his way to the title at 6:48.

Rating: C+. Why would you want to be a face in this company? You might get to hold a title for a few weeks, but at the end of the day, this company is about heels ruling everything around and long stories with them on top instead of letting anyone stand up as a hero. Also, well done on throwing titles around again. That’s always a good idea.

The BDC is still in the ring (of course) and call out Lashley. The champ comes out this time and MVP takes credit for everything Lashley has done. He makes the mistake of saying the title belongs to the BDC but Lashley isn’t cool with that. MVP says Lashley owes the team some thanks but Lashley turns to walk away.

MVP goes to stop him but Lashley tells Hassan (MVP’s real first name) to let him go. That’s ok with MVP, who brings up their time together in WWE. He wants one hug for the road though, which Lashley reluctantly gives. MVP kisses him on the cheek and the beatdown is on. Lashley gets hit in the face with the belt and MVP leaves with the title.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m getting really, really sick of heel stables, especially when you can almost guarantee they’ll be in power by March. This is all TNA does and it’s almost all they’ve done since they debuted. I’m tired of being told to wait and see where it goes, because it ALWAYS GOES THE EXACT SAME WAY.

Look what we had here: one story dominating about 80% of this show, the heels completely dominating the entire show, and most of the heroes getting beaten down. This is after Dixie’s reign of terror, which came after the Aces and 8’s, which came after Immoral. It just never ends and TNA makes it harder and harder to want to stick with them every single week.

Results

Samoa Joe b. Kurt Angle – Koquina Clutch

Hardys b. Wolves – Elevated Twisting Stunner to Edwards

Eric Young b. Bobby Roode – Piledriver onto a chair

Beautiful People b. Brooke Adams/Taryn Terrell – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Low Ki b. Austin Aries – Ki Crusher

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Impact Wrestling – January 7, 2015: Destination: About the Same

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 7, 2015
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Taz, Josh Mathews

It’s a new era in TNA as they’re off SpikeTV and onto Destination America, meaning they’ll be lucky to have half the audience they had before. However, they seem to actually be trying to have a new beginning, which may help them a lot in the long run. The main story here is Roode vs. Lashley III for the title, which should be a solid main event. Let’s get to it.

Before we get started, remember that next week the show will move to its regular time slot on Friday at 9pm EST.

We open with a very cool video showing the roster coming to the arena and looking over New York City. Roode, Storm and MVP give the roster pep talks before we get a Lashley vs. Roode staredown. Kenny King throws a punch at Roode and the brawl is on outside the arena. I mean the entire roster is brawling and being recorded by handheld cameras. They head into the arena and it’s just a massive war. After about five minutes, TNA boss Kurt Angle comes out and asks the fans if they want this fight to continue. He asks where all the champions are and says all titles are on the line tonight.

Angle has one more announcement to make but MVP gets in the ring and cuts him off. The fans tell MVP to shut the F up and the censoring is just a big off. MVP turns his back on Angle to offer him a free shot but Angle just spits. This isn’t the same Angle who used to make people tap out and threw people everywhere, because his in ring career is over. Angle says he’s stepped down as executive director, but he’s been reactivated as a wrestler, meaning it’s him vs. MVP tonight in a street fight. Starting NOW, even though both guys are in street clothes.

Kurt Angle vs. MVP

Both guys are in street The bell rings and Kurt knocks him to the floor as we go to a break eight seconds in. I really wish they would cut that out and just start the match after the break. Back with MVP kicking Angle in the face and no commentary. Kurt rolls some Germans but gets caught in something like Lesnar’s Kimura.

Angle counters with a headscissors and grabs more Germans, only to have MVP go after the knee that put Angle on the shelf for so many months. The commentary here is light years better than with Tenay and Taz as there aren’t any lame jokes and they’re actually focusing on the match. It’s nothing great but I’ll take average over whatever TNA had before any day. Back in again and Angle grabs the ankle lock, only to be pulled down into a side choke. MVP is wrestling a submission styles here and it’s only kind of working. Kurt counters into the ankle lock again but MVP gets up, only to take the Angle Slam for the pin at 11:20.

Rating: D+. This was quick and didn’t need to be a street fight. I understand the idea of bringing Angle back in but I really hope he wraps up his in ring career soon. He just gets hurt way too easily and I really don’t want to see him get hurt even worse next time. The match was too short though and the stipulation wasn’t necessary.

MVP rants to Kenny King after a break and wants to talk to Lashley.

Taz and new commentator Josh Mathews welcome us to the show. The new idea is there are cameras everywhere and they’re pulling the curtain back. I can hear Cornette’s rants from here.

Ethan Carter III (with Tyrus) doesn’t like not being on the show yet. He’s a man of honor and doesn’t break commitments he made. His first commitment: to take Rockstar Spud apart piece by piece, starting tonight. Tyrus is sent to secure the target.

Matthews is glad to be here and throws it to Tenay, who is hosting a new show called Impact Wrestling Unlocked, which sounds like Impact with stats and facts etc.

Tenay had an interview with James Storm about the Revolution and how surprising it’s been to him. Storm says that was the idea, because he’s knocked everything this company has given him out of the park. The group’s members just flock to Storm because he’s preaching the truth to them. Tenay loved the Feast or Fired cash in but wants to know about the future. Storm gets in his face and talks about the devil being less scary than he is before whistling a lot. I still really like this idea and I want to see where it goes.

Tag Team Titles: James Storm/Abyss vs. Wolves

The Revolution took the titles from the Wolves back in late 2014 using a Feast or Fired contract (TNA’s version of Money in the Bank). Actually we’re not done though as the Hardys come out in street clothes as we go to a break before the bell. The match starts with the Hardys just on the floor as spectators as Edwards backdrops Storm onto Abyss, setting up stereo suicide dives. They work so well that the Wolves hit them three more times in a row as the rest of the Revolution (Manik and Sanada) just stand around watching.

Back in and the Wolves start double teaming Storm until Abyss pulls Richards to the floor and chokeslams him onto the apron. I love stuff onto the apron. Richards is in trouble for a good twenty seconds before he rolls over and tags in Edwards to fight off both champions. Storm misses a charge into the corner but gets kicked in the head and caught in a backpack Stunner for two. They’re keeping a very fast pace here and it’s working quite well. The Wolves’ painted claw marks on their chests are working as well.

Abyss tries a double chokeslam but the Wolves backflip out for a cool counter before a top rope double stomp gets two on Storm. Richards is pulled to the floor and Abyss catapults Edwards into a Storm DDT for two. Sanada and Manik try to come in but the Hardys make a save to prevent the DQ. Jeff and Abyss get in a tug of war over Storm’s noose and the distraction lets Storm superkick Edwards to retain at 6:13.

Rating: C. Nice fast paced match here but it didn’t have the time to go anywhere. I’m not sure why we needed the Hardys out there and I really don’t care to see them in the tag division. Storm has something here with the Revolution but does he need to be stuck in another tag team? Let him go after something on his own for a change.

Package on Roode vs. Lashley I.

Carter tells a camera to come with him.

Back from a break with MVP yelling at Lashley about not having his priorities straight. He takes credit for all of Lashley’s success and says he leads this team. Lashley pins him up against the wall and says this is about getting the title back. This calms MVP down a bit.

Jeremy Borash tries to bring out someone for an interview but gets cut off by Ethan Carter III. He brags about his accomplishments and does Tyson’s Kidd’s FACT bit. Carter does one up him a bit though by going to some fans with a mic to do the dueling chant lines. Carter apologizes for slapping JB a few weeks back and asks Spud to get out here right now. Tyrus drags Spud through the entrance and throws him into the ring, where Carter says it’s time to cut the rest of Spud’s hair. His SCALP chant doesn’t quite get off the ground.

JB tries to intervene and actually slaps Carter, earning him a splash from Tyrus. Spud tries to cover him up, but Carter has another idea. It’s going to be Borash getting his hair cut and Carter busts out the clippers to shave off a big chunk of JB’s hair. Spud freaks out but this didn’t have the emotion they were going for.

King talks to MVP in the back but the audio is so low I can’t make out what they’re saying. MVP holds up his phone and that’s enough for King.

Video on Lashley vs. Roode II with Roode taking the title.

Package on the history of the X-Division and the sound quality is lacking again. The voiceover is barely audible unless I turn the volume up far higher than it needs to be on the rest of the show. The video turns into a focus on Low Ki, who has been in the division since it started.

X-Division Title: Austin Aries vs. Low Ki

Ki is defending. Feeling out process to start as Mathews mentions Low Ki being the first ROH Champion and plugging WWE Hall of Famer Edge being on Taz’s debut podcast in the span of ten seconds. They trade headscissors as Taz lists off some Brooklyn landmarks. Aries kicks Ki to the floor but charges into a kick to the head for a nice counter. Back up and Aries fires off forearms to send Ki to the floor for a suicide dive. That’s a move they need to tone down as it’s the fifth use of it in less than an hour.

The missile dropkick looks to set up the brainbuster but Ki counters into a kind of dragon sleeper. Aries grabs the ropes and heads up top, only to get kicked in the head again. Not to be outdone, Aries kicks Ki down from the top and plants him with a brainbuster to win the title for a sixth time at 6:18.

Rating: C+. Good but not great match here and I’m not wild on Aries getting the title back. Again, it’s something we’ve seen before and nothing I really need to see repeated. The matches are going to be entertaining, but they need some fresh talent in that division. Swap some of the roster around and give Aries some fresh competition, because they can only do the same matches so many times.

Knockouts Title: Battle Royal

Angelina Love, Velvet Sky, Taryn Terrell, Madison Rayne, Gail Kim, Havok, Rebel

Taryn Terrell is defending. Before the match, Robbie E. is welcomed back to TNA after competing on the Amazing Race. He didn’t win a million dollars due to his horrible partner, but at least he still looks like a million dollars. Robbie rips on Brooke a bit more until Taryn’s entrance cuts him off. Gail goes after Havok to start before the Beautiful People put Rebel out. Madison saves herself on the apron but get dumped by Havok.

Velvet eats defeat and Taryn knocks Angelina out as this is a very lame battle royal. Like even lamer than most battle royals. We’re down to Havok, Terrell, Kim and Sky with Havok taking a double dropkick. Brooke comes in through the crowd and jumps Robbie. Terrell and Kim dump Velvet before Havok throws out Gail, only to get thrown out by Terrell to retain at 4:58.

Rating: D-. This was REALLY dull stuff and just there to get to the ending. I know they’re trying to make Havok out to be a monster, but I don’t think she’s had ten matches in TNA so far. How dominant of a monster can she be with such a short resume? I mean, it’s not like she’s Kong or anything.

Post match Havok jumps Terrell and puts her in a bearhug but the lights go out. They come back up…..and KONG IS BACK! She stares Havok down and chokeslams a referee for old times’ sake.

TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Bobby Roode

Roode is defending and starts fast, only to be driven into the corner for some hard shoulders to the ribs. A delayed vertical suplex gets two on the champ but he comes back with the Crossface to send Lashley to the ropes. I hope they’re not going with the idea of using the same hold over and over again until the other guy taps out. Mix things up a bit and build to a finisher instead of just starting it at first.

They head outside with Roode being sent into the barricade but coming back with a hard clothesline. We get an inset camera shot of MVP and King in the back with two masked men. Security won’t let the masked men come in so the security guy gets beaten down as we go to a break. Back with Roode in a chinlock followed by a bearhug. Taz and Mathews actually explain how Lashley is softening up the midsection for the spear later on. I haven’t heard actual analysis from TNA since I don’t remember when.

Roode fights out and they stare each other down for a cool visual. The champ takes over with a clothesline and a big spinebuster for two, only to jump into a Davey Boy powerslam (to go with the delayed vertical suplex from earlier. Nothing but good can come from watching British Bulldog matches) for the same. Lashley hammers away in the corner but gets powerbombed down for another near fall. Now we get to something new as they hit each others’ finishers for two each.

Cue MVP, King and the masked men as Roode grabs the Crossface. Lashley just stands up for the break, only to walk into the Roode Bomb for two. Back to the Crossface (cross forehead actually) but King pulls the referee out and decks him with a right hand. Angle comes out to brawl with him but gets beaten down. The masked men unveil themselves as Low Ki and Samoa Joe. Eric Young comes in with a chair….and turns on Roode with a bunch of chair shots. Lashley spears Roode down for the pin and the title at 20:00.

Rating: B-. I liked the match utnil the ending, which feels like yet another heel stable. Eric Young as a potential big bad drives me insane because…..how do I put this…..NO ONE CARES ABOUT ERIC FREAKING YOUNG! The match was good and I’m assuming this sets up Lethal Lockdown with Team Roode vs. Team MVP or Lashley. Not the worst idea but I’m terrified of another heel stable, especially if there’s going to be a leader with authority.

Overall Rating: C+. I’m torn on this one as I really liked the energy and some of the tweaks they made (commentary was WAY better tonight), but it feels like they’re resetting a lot of what they did back in December. Aries is X-Division Champion again and Lashley has the World Title back? So why put it on Roode in the first place other than to just give it a feel good moment?

The ending…..erg. This is the frustrating part about TNA: they can’t help but go back to the same ideas that we’ve seen so many times before to diminishing results each time. The idea might work for awhile at first, but then it overstays its welcome and turns into the same idea they’ve always had. Hopefully that’s not where they’re going with this, but TNA doesn’t deserve the benefit of the doubt.

The rest of the show worked pretty well though as they focused on the wrestling and advanced stories where they needed to. The Revolution is still awesome and Storm is nailing the cult leader character, especially with that creepy whistling. They also did a good job of introducing a lot of the new people. I’d call this a good first effort on a new channel, but the ending makes me nervous.

Results

Kurt Angle b. MVP – Angle Slam

James Storm/Abyss b. Wolves – Last Call to Edwards

Austin Aries b. Low Ki – Brainbuster

Taryn Terrell won a battle royal last eliminating Havok

Lashley b. Bobby Roode – Spear

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Impact Wrestling – December 17, 2014: It Ends With Old Guys

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 17, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Taz
Hosts: Christy Hemme, Jeremy Borash

Since the show is leaving Spike, this episode is the first half of a Top 20 Moments in TNA History and is airing at 11pm instead of the usual 9pm timeslot. It gets even better next week with the show starting at midnight on Christmas Eve night. When they bury a show they really bury it. Let’s get to it.

As usual I’ll be posting the full versions of any matches that are clipped.

20. Lockdown 2008.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

In a cage with Angle defending and Joe’s career on the line. They haven’t had a PPV match in awhile so we get a recap of their whole history. This is treated more like an MMA fight with Angle in black shorts instead of his usual singlet and MMA fighter Frank Trigg on commentary. Before the match, Angle has Karen thrown out from her front row seat.

They even start by standing in MMA stances before trading leg kicks. Joe gets a leg bar but Angle is almost immediately in the ropes. Down to the mat with Angle hammering away at Joe’s guard as this is getting old fast. Joe gets the better of some mat grappling before it’s back to the stupid MMA stances. Angle finally snaps off a suplex and puts on a side choke until Joe makes the ropes.

Off to a front facelock from the champion before a quick German suplex gets two. A shot to the knee puts Joe down again and we hit the figure four. It’s about time we got to some wrestling. Joe finally turns it over but Angle is right next to the ropes. Angle cranks on the leg again but Joe chops his way out of it. That’s fine with Kurt as he slaps on a quickly broken headlock. Seriously a headlock in a cage match?

Back up and Joe nails a clothesline to put Kurt down but he has to shake his knee a bit. Kurt goes to the middle rope but gets caught by the enziguri. The MuscleBuster is countered and Angle hooks the ankle lock. Joe rolls out and gets two out of the release Rock Bottom out of the corner. The powerbomb into the Walls of Jericho into the STF into the crossface has Angle screaming.

Kurt grabs the ankle to finally escape but Joe pulls Angle back down into the crossface in the middle of the ring. Angle finally rolls over to get the ropes but Joe puts it right back on. Another rope is grabbed and the Angle Slam gets two. The champion puts on the ankle lock but he spins one too many times and gets pulled into the Clutch, only to use the referee’s shirt to make it to the ropes. Another Angle Slam attempt is countered and Joe sends him face first into the cage (first time it’s been used) and the MuscleBuster FINALLY gives Joe the title.

Rating: B. This got much better once they stopped the stupid MMA stuff and had a wrestling match. There was no need to have a cage here as it was only used once towards the end, which could have been replaced by a kick or something like that. It’s a good match and a good moment, but at the end of the day this was too overdone for what it needed to be.

19. Destination X 2012.

TNA World Title: Austin Aries vs. Bobby Roode

Feeling out process to start without a lot of offense either way. After about a minute and twenty seconds they lock up and Roode grabs the arm. Aries grabs the arm to counter but gets run over. They’re still in slow mode and that’s fine. A rolling cradle gets two for Aries and he hooks an STF. They hit the mat and Roode slaps him in the back of his head a few times. Now Aries takes him down to the mat and hits a slingshot tope for two.

Roode hooks a headscissors on the mat which is quickly broken up and they head outside. Aries hits a top rope ax handle to the floor but his missile dropkick misses back inside and Roode takes over. Roode hooks a chinlock but a knee drop misses. Aries fires off with kicks and tries the Last Chancery but it doesn’t go on right. Roode goes to the floor but avoids the suicide dive, sending Aries into the barricade.

Roode hooks a bodyscissors back in the ring followed by a hard whip into the corner. He talks a lot of trash to the downed Aries and hits a combination F5/Samoan Drop for two. Off to a body vice on the mat and Aries is cut on the nose. Aries makes a comeback and fires off forearms and chops in the corner. They slug it out and a discus forearm puts Roode down. A clothesline puts Roode on the floor and there’s the suicide dive which connects this time.

This time the missile dropkick hits as well but Aries charges into a powerslam out of the corner. Aries comes back again and tries the Last Chancery again, but Roode is pretty bad at selling it. Roode counters into a Crossface but Aries counters right back into the Chancery. Aries gets in another shot to the head and goes up for the 450, but Roode moves. Aries rolls through it anyway but walks into the spinebuster for two.

The champion sends him shoulder first into the post and goes back to the Crossface. That stays on for a long time but Aries makes the rope. Roode is frustrated now so he grabs the belt, only to have it taken away by the referee. That allows the champ to hit a low blow for two. Roode argues with the referee and gets shoved into the corner, allowing Aries to hit the corner dropkick.

Aries tries the brainbuster but Roode escapes and the ref is bumped. Roode hits a belt shot for a VERY close two. The fisherman’s suplex is countered into a small package for two and Aries punts Roode in the head. He grabs the brainbuster out of nowhere for the pin and the title in a huge shocker.

Rating: B+. Another good match to close the show here, but the point of this was in the surprise. This felt like a big moment and it was the right call to pull the trigger here. This show was designed around the X-Division and having the longest reigning champion win the world title here was the right way to make the X Title look like it can be something comparable to the world title. Good match too.

18. Victory Road 2010.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Ok so the Guns more or less have to win here. I like the Guns’ music. Storm and Shelley start us off. They’re doing a slow build to start us off as Taz says the Guns are the best team from their city, including the Tigers. Uh, deep? We get a Mel Torme reference of all things as we’re talking about tap dancing. Beer Money takes over and after a double vertical suplex they do their thing.

Shelley is getting beaten on. This is a good match so far so it’s hard to make jokes. Well other than Taz and Tenay who are always jokes. Ah there’s Sabin. I like him better than Shelley I think. We crank it up a bit and Sabin hits a running punt on Storm while he’s on the apron and Storm is on the floor. The crowd is getting back into it a bit too. Eye of the Storm gets two on Sabin.

I’m sorry for the excessive play by play here but that’s the main thing going on here. That made less than no sense but just go with it. We’ve lost any resemblance of a tag match here as it’s just all insanity. Maybe Heyman is booking the company. Everything just goes insane and this is awesome for once. The Guns dominate as Storm has a beer bottle. The referee gets beer spit in his face as the Guns hit a combination splash/neckbreaker on Roode for two.

There’s another referee here now and I have a bad feeling about this. It’s ALL Guns here as we’re going fast paced here. They hit their kick combination and cover Roode as Storm rolls Sabin up. The referees count a double pin and it’s Dusty Finish time. Earl, not the original referee, says restart it. The Guns win in like a minute with the same thing they did earlier, making the restart TOTALLY POINTLESS. Very good match though so I can’t complain much.

Rating: A-. This was a VERY good match. The main thing holding it back is the restart which was the walking definition of overbooking. What in the world is that supposed to help? Whatever it was I certainly don’t get it. The Guns are the champions, albeit nearly three years later. Still though, if they’re going to win them, at least win them in a classic I guess. Very good match all the way through. Loved it.

We get a collection of comedy moments from over the years, including Shark Boy waking up in a hospital bed, Curry Man rambling and meeting Shark Boy, Eric Young winning a bikini contest, Big Fat Oily Guy, the Aces and 8’s Funeral, Jay Lethal and Flair having a WOO Off, Robbie E. vs. Robbie T. in a Bro Off (E.’s face at the end of T.’s routine still cracks me up), Shark Boy getting fat, Eric Bischoff being dumped in a portable toilet and ODB marrying Eric Young.

17. Impact – July 7, 2010.

This is another moment where they put the wrong date on the show as it was actually July 8. The moment is Jay Lethal’s perfect imitation of Ric Flair which words don’t do justice. He had the voice down and every catchphrase, sending Flair into fits in the ring. Go find this one online because it’s hilarious and all in the way Lethal sounds and just typing it out would ruin the joke.

16. Bound For Glory 2009.

X-Division Title: Suicide vs. Daniels vs. Amazing Red vs. Homicide vs. Chris Sabin vs. Alex Shelley

Ultimate X with Red defending. Red is a guy that was around near the beginning of TNA and did some very impressive flips, earning the adulation of Don West. Don is now managing the champ and was known to climb on the announcers’ table and cheer for him. Sabin and Shelley won a match on the preshow to get in this match. Suicide is a video game character who started appearing on TV, portrayed by Daniels or Kazarian (the latter here). Homicide is part of the World Elite stable, which is a group of international wrestlers, led by Eric Young, who feel they haven’t been treated right.

It’s a mad scramble to the corners to start but no one can get anywhere. Everyone goes after everyone with Homicide getting the biggest advantage by taking down Shelley and diving through the ropes to take out Daniels. Suicide rolls the champion over and dives onto Homicide but the Guns work together to set up a suicide dive on…uh Suicide actually. Red kicks Shelley but gets dropped by Daniels, who goes for a climb. Red isn’t done yet and hurricanranas Daniels onto everyone else in the match.

Back in and Sabin busts out a giant swing on Red but Shelley adds a dropkick to the champ’s head to make it even worse. Daniels attacks both Guns and Homicide goes for a climb, only to have Suicide springboard up to the ropes and make a save, only to get pulled down into a Gringo Cutter. Sabin holds Daniels and Homicide for a top rope double stomp from Shelley.

The Guns continue their control by working over Red but the champion escapes a Doomsday Device with a Sliced Bread #2 instead of a clothesline and takes Sabin down with a hurricanrana. Suicide comes back in but Homicide suplexes him down. Homicide drops the champ and goes up but Daniels pulls him down and nails a Death Valley Driver. Red goes for the ropes but slowly comes back down for some reason, only to go back towards the belt until Suicide pulls him back down.

Now it’s Daniels and Sabin going up and kicking at each other while hanging in the air, eventually knocking each other down for a big crash. Sabin nails a tornado DDT on Daniels and Shelley nails a Sliced Bread #2 on Suicide. We get the Parade of Secondary Finishers, followed by Shelley, Red and Suicide hitting a huge Tower of Doom out of the corner with Suicide taking the worst of it (and kicking Daniels in the face on the way down).

Suicide throws Daniels down but Red kicks him in the face and gets caught by a corkscrew dive. Sabin goes nuts until Suicide kicks him off the top rope. Suicide goes right back up and hits the Flux Capacitor on Sabin, setting up Daniels’ Best Moonsault Ever. Daniels and Suicide climb onto the top of the structure above the cables and Red follows after them.

The fans ask them not to die so Daniels and Suicide tease suplexing each other off. They slap each other until Daniels carefully climbs down onto the X but Suicide does the same and they both fall with Daniels landing on his head. Tazz rightfully shouts CHECK HIM as Red slips down through the treeses as well and grabs the title before someone dies.

Rating: C+. That Daniels bump had me terrified when I saw it live and it doesn’t get any easier here. Thankfully he was ok for the most part. I can’t emphasize how much better this was than last year’s opener with just six men involved. It gives the match a chance to breathe and you can keep track of what’s going on. This was a good opener but the Daniels fall made it hard to sit through at the end.

15. Lockdown 2013.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bully Ray

In the cage of course with Hardy defending. Tenay says Ray has a 50+ pound weigh advantage about a minute after Ray is announced at 275 to Hardy’s 227. Feeling out process to start with Ray running Hardy over with a hard shoulder. A quick slam gets two for Ray and the champion bails to the corner. Hardy fights back with the Whisper in the Wind for two but can’t escape as Ray rams Hardy’s leg into the cage.

Ray starts a slow and methodical offense by working over the champion’s ribs and back. A big backdrop gets two for Ray but Jeff gets in a shot to earn himself a breather. The Twist and the Bubba Bomb are both countered but the second attempt at the Twist of Fate connects. Cue Wes Brisco and Garrett Bischoff into the cage but Jeff and Bully run them over. Bully lets himself be a springboard for Poetry in Motion before throwing both bikers out.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring with Jeff actually taking over. A flying forearm takes Bully down and there’s a low dropkick for two. Hardy tries to climb out but Ray makes the save and they slug it out on the top rope. Hardy kicks Ray in the head but falls to the mat, allowing Ray to fall off the top onto Jeff for a VERY close two. The Twist staggers Bully but as Jeff goes up, Ray hits a HUGE sitout powerbomb out of the corner to put both guys down.

Ray covers for two and the fans are split. Cue the Hogans to watch the main event from ringside to cheer on Bully. Ray gets to his feet very slowly but here are Aces and 8’s. Ray stands up and has a chain as the bikers come in. To the shock of not many people, Ray is thrown a hammer by D-Von and clubs down Jeff to win the title, revealing himself as the leader at 17:20.

Rating: B-. That powerbomb alone was worth the whole match. The ending isn’t really all that surprising but at least Aces and 8’s have FINALLY done something of note. Bully Ray as world champion of a major company in 2013 is a huge gamble to say the least, but it appears that we’re heading to Hogan vs. Ray down the line. To call that a gamble is an even shorter stretch but it’s what we appear to be getting.

We hear a quick recap from Bully Ray about how the Aces and 8’s plan came together. This really helped tie things together after it didn’t make a lot of sense for months on end.

In some storyline development, we see Shera being tortured in the woods, likely as his way of joining the Revolution.

14. Bound For Glory 2007.

Knockouts Title: Gauntlet Match

This is to crown the inaugural champion. As usual, it’s over the top with one minute intervals for the ten entrants until we get to the final two when it becomes one fall to a finish. Miss Brooks is in at #1 and Jackie Moore is in at #2. Jackie runs Brooks over and knocks her face first onto the mat until Shelley Martinez is in at #3. Brooks goes after Shelley and gets dropped with a reverse DDT for her efforts. Jackie goes after Shelley, allowing Brooks to hit a top rope seated senton on Martinez.

Awesome Kong is in at #4 but takes 55 seconds to get to the ring and can’t do anything. Jackie throws out Brooks and Kong dumps Martines. ODB is in at #5 and also takes her time getting in, allowing Kong to plant Jackie and dump her out. We’re down to ODB vs. Kong and of course ODB starts swinging. Angel Williams is in at #6 as Kong is hammering away on ODB. The girls wisely double team Kong but are quickly suplexed down.

Christy Hemme (looking GREAT) is in at #7 and immediately gets put in a torture rack. Kong slams her down until Gail Kim comes in at #8 with a missile dropkick. Hemme is taken out by medics as the other three gang up on Kong. They finally dump Kong out (and break her top at the same time) as Talia Madison is in at #9. ODB and Gail Kim double team Williams out Roxxi Leveaux is in at #10 so we have a final grouping of Gail, Roxxi, ODB and Talia. Gail throws out Talia and Roxxi dumps ODB to get us to the one on one match.

Roxxi nails her with a forearm to the chest and plants her with a fall away slam for two. The fans are almost entirely behind Gail, as they’ve been since the beginning. An Octopus Hold has Roxxi in trouble but she falls into the ropes. Gail misses a missile dropkick and they trade rollups for two each. Back up and Kim grabs White Noise for the pin and the first title.

Rating: C-. These matches are hard to get into and it would have helped quite a bit if we hadn’t had a battle royal about an hour ago. Kim is a good choice for the first champion and has a built in challenger in Kong, who had some great matches with Gail in the coming months. I do like that she won the title with a pin instead of dumping someone out though. It feels more proper.

13. Impact – March 3, 2011.

Time for the wedding. Eric Young is the ring bearer and Orlando Jordan is the flower girl. Jeff comes out thankfully not to his theme music. Tazz keeps calling Karen by the name Karen Angle. And of course here’s Kurt and the brawl is on. Jeff almost goes into the definitely not ten foot cake. Kurt hits a clothesline and here’s Karen. She slaps Kurt and goes into the cake. Angle’s music plays it out. This whole thing might have lasted two and a half minutes.

From later in the night.

Time for wedding #2. Young it still wedding bearer and Jordan is still flower girl. Jeff doesnt have a coat on this time. Kurt walks Karen down the aisle. Hes smiling and Karen seems to still have cake on her face. Kurt is all happy here and its rather amusing. No Bart Scott in sight. The fans boo at the or forever hold your piece line. They both say I will and all that jazz. The minister asks the fans if theyll support the Jarretts. Take a guess how that goes over.

Now we get to hear CUSTOM vows. Weve had a combined 12 minutes of wrestling and were getting custom vows. Wow indeed. Jeff says hes long winded and would be nervous so he wrote his out. He runs down Kurt the whole time and Kurt just keeps smiling away. Hes looking over Jeffs shoulder and its rather creepy. Karen is the wind beneath his wings.

Karen says Jeff is a real man and the princess is taken care of. Oh and Kurt didn’t screw her enough apparently. Jeff completes her. The minister announces them as husband and wife through the power vested in him by the department of motor vehicles. The unintentional comedy is helping here. They actually get through the kissing of the bride, so Kurt busts out an ax and starts hacking the set to pieces, all with that creepy grin on his face. That was kind of awesome.

Bischoff sends out New York Jets linebacker Bart Scott. Yes send your celebrity out to the CRAZY MAN WITH AN AXE! Surprisingly enough they go at it and Kurt grabs the ankle lock and cranks on it. Didn’t expect that. Segment went WAY too long but the ending helped it a lot.

12. Impact – October 29, 2014.

TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Bobby Roode

They have a ton of time for this, Lashley is defending and Kurt Angle is guest referee. MVP and King are nowhere in sight. Lashley powers Bobby into the corner to start and easily takes him down with an amateur move. A hard shoulder to the ribs has Roode in even more trouble but Bobby comes back with a clothesline and tells Lashley to bring it on. The champ is all fired up but his clothesline is countered into the Crossface, sending Lashley out to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Lashley holding a reverse wasitlock until Bobby fights up with forearms. A quick Blockbuster gets two but Roode charges into a spinning spinebuster. Lashley ducks another shot but clotheslines Angle (first time he’s meant anything in the match) by mistake. The Roode Bomb is countered and Lashley nails the spear with no one to count the pin. Another spear hits Angle to knock him to the floor, allowing Roode to enziguri Lashley to the floor.

Bobby follows and avoids a spear, sending a ring attendant flying. A Roode Bomb on the ramp puts both guys down but there’s still no Angle to count anything. Instead Brian Hebner comes in to count the near fall and Bobby is frustrated. Lashley hits Roode low and gets the belt but Hebner says no.

That earns him a knockout clothesline, allowing Lashley to hit Roode with the belt. Angle comes in to count two and is finally back to his feet. The Roode Bomb is countered and Lashley snaps Bobby’s throat across the top rope. Another attempt is countered into a sunset flip attempt but Roode falls on top for the pin and the title at 17:49.

Rating: B. The match got going near the middle but I really don’t see why Angle needed to be out there. Any regular referee could have played his role to the same degree but maybe they’re setting up Lashley vs. Angle down the line? The important part though is Roode being made into a bigger deal than he was before, but now he needs to have a very solid title reign to make it even better. TNA is really needing a top face and if Roode is that guy then so be it.

11. Bound For Glory 2011.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

Bischoff’s son is referee. Sting is insane here and wears a Hulkamania shirt to the ring. Hulk is in street clothes. The bell rings and here comes Flair as we keep looking at Dixie Carter in the front row. Sting grabs a headlock to start but Hogan shoves him away and Hulks Up. That gets Hogan a crotch chop so Hulk punches him down and puts on a chinlock. Sting gets sent outside but is quickly back inside to have his back and eyes raked.

Hogan throws him outside for low blows and chops from Flair before Hulk starts biting at Sting’s forehead. The beating goes on for awhile until they head back inside where Flair slips Hogan a foreign object. The shots bust Sting open but Sting comes back with right hands. He stops the beating and goes after Flair, stealing the foreign object to cut Hogan open as well. A pair of Stinger Splashes set up the Scorpion Deathlock and Hogan gives up, forcing referee Jackson James to call for the bell.

Rating: D+. This one would fall under the category of “what else were you expecting?” At the end of the day, TNA basically exists to make Sting look good so this really shouldn’t be a surprise. Someone young probably should have gotten the rub from Hogan, but Sting clearly needed this spot instead right?

Immortal comes out to destroy Sting with chairs as Abyss is shown watching from behind the curtain. Jackson James takes one of them away, turning face about an hour and fifteen minutes after he turned heel. Bischoff hits him with a chair, starting the most unwanted face push in the history of ever.

Sting crawls over to Hogan and begs for help, because if there’s one thing more important than making Sting look good, it’s making Hogan look good. Hogan makes the big face turn and helps Sting clean house, because two bloody guys in their 50s beating up about seven guys armed with chairs makes perfect sense. Posing ensues and of course the old WWF crowd eats it up. It’s a cool segment for the moment, but this was basically all about Hogan and Sting instead of doing anything for TNA long term.

Overall Rating: B. The show was entertaining due to having some excellent wrestling, but let’s recap that ending real fast: the big moment that you end the show on is two guys in their 50s who currently work for WWE. They couldn’t have swapped this with #12 so that the last thing we see is the reigning World Champion standing tall after vanquishing an unstoppable beast? It was really necessary that we had to show Sting and Hogan at the end of the show?

The show as a whole was good enough, but I would have liked to see some stuff from the old days. There had to be some great stuff in there, but maybe they’re saving those for next week. I really hope this doesn’t turn into the best since the Hogan Era began, because there are some gems from back in the day that have just been forgotten over the years.

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