Impact Wrestling – February 25, 2020: The Most Impact Thing Impact Could Do

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 25, 2020
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

Sacrifice has come and gone with no title changes because no title was on the line in the main event. My guess is that’s so they could avoid any kind of spoilers on the taping cycle and while that makes sense, it didn’t make the stakes seem that high on Saturday. We should be building towards Rebellion now so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a clip of World Champion Tessa Blanchard defeating X-Division Champion Ace Austin at Sacrifice. Now Ace wants a title match so managed granted it, but for his title and not hers. Makes sense.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Daga

Katie Forbes is at ringside and the fans are behind hometown boy RVD. Daga kicks him to the floor to start and nails a suicide dive, only to get slammed down. Back in and Rob crotches him on the ropes for the kick to the face as Katie is on a Twitter blocking spree. Rolling Thunder is loaded up but Rob rolls outside to kiss Katie instead.

Rating: C-. It was starting to get somewhere but at the same time, there is only so much that Rob can do in the ring at the moment. He’s gotten older and is nowhere near as explosive, but points to them for coming up with a way to hide the fact that he just isn’t as athletic anymore. There is going to be a rematch here, perhaps in a cage where Van Dam can’t run, but this didn’t exactly make me interested in seeing it.

Jordynne Grace issues an open challenge to anyone in the locker room. Madison Rayne comes up but doesn’t want to hear anything from Grace until she has won the title five times. Guidance is offered and Madison promises to find a suitable opponent tonight.

Rohit Raju vs. Zachary Wentz

The rest of the Desi Hit Squad/the Rascalz are here. This is fallout from Raju costing the Rascalz the Tag Team Titles at Sacrifice because they didn’t get a title shot. They fight over a headlock to start until Wentz takes him down with a front facelock. Back up and a slugout actually goes to Raju, who takes him down with a running knee to the head.

A suplex gets two and we take a break. Back with Wentz kicking away, including an enziguri, followed by a Stunner over the middle rope. Raju grabs a Downward Spiral for two more but Wentz is right back with a cutter driver. A brawl on the floor distracts Wentz though, allowing Raju to avoid a Swanton and hit a top rope double stomp for the pin at 10:17.

Rating: C. Just another match between members of teams here and that’s not enough to make me care about them that much. The Rascalz are a fun act but then you have the Hit Squad, who are as generic of a group of heels as you can get. The match was technically fine, but trying to get me interested in a Hit Squad match is like trying to get me interested in a farmhouse in Gary, Indiana.

Post match the Realityislost/ICU video pops up and the Squad notices it.

Ace Austin doesn’t understand why Tessa gets a title shot first. Don’t worry though because he’ll win tonight and become #1 contender. Tessa may be undeniable but he is inevitable.

OVE, minus Sami Callihan, say they’re not done.

Knockouts Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Miranda Alize

Alize is challenging and has Madison Rayne in her corner. A charge at Grace doesn’t go well as the champ pulls her down, only to get caught in a headscissors. Alize gets two off a forearm as Madison says Alize can’t beat Grace without covering her. I love it when wrestlers try to sound smart but miss the point entirely. Back up and the Grace Driver is blocked and Alize gets two off a cutter. Not that it matters as the second Grace Driver attempt retains the title at 4:05.

Rating: C-. Alize was fine here but it looks like we’re coming up on Grace vs. Rayne for the title. That’s fine for a first title program for Grace as Rayne will give her a good match before coming up short. Grace is the kind of champion where it’s going to take a special effort to get the title off of her and that might take some time. Decent enough match for its time.

The North isn’t sweating TJP and Fallah Bahh next week. The two of them want to be like the North because they are tag team wrestling around here.

Chris Bey is coming.

Jessika Havok is looking for someone but Rosemary finds her. Rosemary isn’t happy with Havok joining up with James Mitchell again so next week, Havok can face Su Yung in a no DQ match.

From Dayton, Ohio at a Pro Wrestling Revolver event.

Michael Elgin vs. Eddie Edwards

Match #4 in a best of five series with Elgin up 2-1. Elgin grabs a headlock to start and then shoulders him down but Eddie snaps off a belly to belly. That’s fine with Elgin, who hits a slingshot elbow to the jaw to put Eddie down again. Elgin chops him down and hits a sliding elbow, followed by some slams to show off the power. It takes a bit too long to go to the top though and Eddie brings him down with a superplex.

The Backpack Stunner is broken up so Eddie settles for a German suplex. Elgin blasts him with a clothesline though and we take a break. Back with Eddie flipping out of another German suplex and hitting the low superkick to put them both down. Eddie’s tiger bomb gets two but he misses the moonsault. Some rollups give Eddie two but he has to avoid a sliding elbow, allowing him to roll Elgin up again, this time for the pin at 16:14.

Rating: B-. A lot of the interest has fallen away from these matches but that’s going to happen with the amount of times they’ve had it out there. The fifth match will at least have some stakes to it, but it’s kind of telling that they moved it to another show so the fans wouldn’t get burned out on it. That being said, there are far worse things they can do and the matches have been solid. Just wrap it up soon.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Jeff Hardy wins the World Title from Mr. Anderson at Against All Odds 2011. The graphic says 2010, as Impact does the most Impact thing ever by not even being able to celebrate their own history without making a mistake.

Scott D’Amore and Petey Williams are happy at the thought of the TNA show on April 3. Moose comes up to say TNA is dead so let it be dead. Why celebrate people like Suicide and Chris Sabin? Petey: “We were all actual champions.” Violence is implied.

Johnny Swinger annoys Willie Mack again but here’s Disco Inferno to say he’ll team with Swinger instead.

Video on Gut Check. Thank goodness this isn’t a full on in-arena segment again. Some of these names are from OVW.

X-Division Title: Tessa Blanchard vs. Ace Austin

Ace is defending and only his title is on the line. Tessa starts fast with some running dropkicks, including one in the corner for two. A rollup gets the same but Ace grabs a backbreaker as we take a break. Back with Ace hitting a spinning elbow to the face for two and it’s off to a bow and arrow hold. Tessa fights out of the corner and snaps off a headscissors to the floor, followed by the big dive.

Back in and Ace grabs a gutbuster to cut Tessa off again and we hit the reverse chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry so Ace kicks her in the back a few times instead. Now it’s something like a dragon sleeper but Tessa is up in a hurry to start slugging away. A running hurricanrana sets up a tornado DDT but here’s Taya Valkyrie to jump Tessa for the DQ at 10:48.

Rating: C. So that’s all you can ask for with the ending as Tessa has already proven she can beat Ace so there’s no need to have her win the X-Division Title here. Taya is someone with history against Tessa so it’s not out of the question to have that be the next title challenger. Given that either Edwards or Elgin is facing Tessa at Rebellion, this is going to be a one off against a challenger that beat Tessa before but she has since surpassed. It’s Ultimate Warrior defending against Rick Rude in 1990 and that’s….probably me putting way too much thought into this.

Taya beats Tessa up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show felt pretty flat and while it set up stuff for the future, there wasn’t much of a fire to the whole thing. There also wasn’t a great or even very good match on the show, leaving is just kind of there instead of anything noteworthy. Not a terrible show or anything close, but nothing you need to see here.

Results

Daga b. Rob Van Dam via countout

Rohit Raju b. Zachary Wentz – Top rope double stomp

Jordynne Grace b. Miranda Alize – Grace Driver

Eddie Edwards b. Michael Elgin – Rollup

Tessa Blanchard b. Ace Austin via DQ when Taya Valkyrie interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – March 15, 2019: The Slow Moving Crawl

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 15, 2019
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

Things are rolling along as usual around here, which means a lot of the same stories that kind of need to go somewhere already. That’s one of Impact’s biggest problems and it’s been the case for years: they don’t seem to know how wrap up stories so things just keep going on and on for months. Hopefully we get some advancement soon because the good things that they have are rapidly approaching their expiration date. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Standard opening recap.

Opening sequence.

OVE vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Tommy Dreamer

Yes seriously. It’s a brawl to start with Swann and Callihan being left in the ring until Rich kicks him to the floor. The good guys are left inside until it’s Dreamer and Sami starting things off, allowing Callis to talk about Dreamer sticking his nose into everything. Preach it man. Mack comes in to work on Jake’s arm and Dreamer adds a bottom rope ax handle. Dave takes over on Dreamer and it’s off to Sami for an elbow drop.

The Cactus Piledriver is countered though and it’s a catapult to send Sami into the corner. Mack comes back in for a powerslam and the standing moonsault, followed by a nip up. Dreamer drops an elbow and does his version of a nip up (it’s funny because he’s old and fat), leaving Mack and Swann to do their dives.

Instead of diving, Dreamer runs to the apron and climbs down for some right hands (it’s funny because he’s old and fat if you didn’t get the same joke a minute ago). Back from a break with Swann fighting out of Sami’s chinlock but getting caught in Jake’s reverse Rings of Saturn.

With that broken up, Dave works on the leg until a kick to the head lets Dreamer get the hot tag. Sami comes in to spit in Dreamer’s face as everything breaks down. Dreamer knocks all three of them into a corner for a running cannonball from Mack, and it’s stereo frog splashes onto the Crists. Tommy even hits his own splash onto Sami (BECAUSE HE’S OLD AND FAT!) but Callihan pops up and hits the Cactus Piledriver for the pin at 19:03.

Rating: C-. So now the heel commentator’s line is “Dreamer needs to go away because he keeps stealing spots from people”? Why would I disagree with that? Is is because Dreamer is a legend who won’t go away? Or is it because he’s old and fat and makes fun of being old and fat? It’s not funny but you can’t make fun of Dreamer because he was in ECW or something.

Brian Cage asks Johnny Impact, in a neck brace, if he’s ready for tonight. Johnny says he’ll be there. The swerve is strong with this one.

Video on Impact vs. Cage, with the title on the line tonight.

The Rascalz are in their circle when Moose joins them and wonders what’s up with Melissa Santos. Moose punches them all for making fun of his clothes.

Here’s Glenn Gilbertti to call out Scarlett Bordeaux, who he fights next week. Instead he gets a clown.

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Kikutaro

He’s a Japanese comedy guy in a mask. They fight over arm control to start with Kikutaro stopping to dance. Some shoulders don’t work so Glenn punches him down and whips Kikutaro across the ring over and over. The chinlock goes on for all of two seconds so Glenn slams him down but misses the Village People’s Elbow (with a YMCA dance). Kikutaro hits part of a Shining Wizard but a missed moonsault lets Glenn hit the Chartbuster (Stunner) for the pin at 4:23.

Rating: D. It’s kind of hard to complain that much about this story as it’s mostly harmless and isn’t getting a ton of time. Scarlett is going to beat Gilbertti up and the fans will be happy while no one of value takes a loss. They’re giving the story about five minutes a week and that’s all they need to do. In other words, this was harmless.

Taya Valkyrie isn’t worried about defending the Knockouts Title because her husband is in danger tonight.

Reno Scum vs. KM/Fallah Bahh

Rematch from a few weeks ago when Scum lost but beat them up after the match. It’s a brawl on the floor to start with Scum taking over and sending Bahh into the steps. KM gets punched in the corner until an enziguri drops Luster. There’s no Bahh though, meaning KM has to clothesline Thornstowe down before making the real hot tag. The Samoan drop gets two on Thornstowe, followed by Luster going shoulder first into the post. That’s enough for Bahh to hit a belly to belly for the pin on Thornstowe at 4:32.

Rating: D. Another nothing match but that’s the best way to use Scum. They’re just loud and obnoxious which isn’t enough to make me want to see them stick around. I don’t say this often but KM and Bahh deserve better than this. Hopefully this was just for the Las Vegas tapings as I really don’t want Scum around regularly.

Konnan asks the Lucha Bros when they’re giving LAX their rematch. That’s not happening so Konnan threatens them as they leave.

Post break Konnan tells them that there’s no rematch yet. LAX doesn’t seem worried because it’s going to be a street fight.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Jordynne Grace

#1 contenders match. Tessa can’t do much with the power to start so Jordynne runs her over with a clothesline. The threat of a splash in the corner makes Tessa pull the referee in front of her, meaning it’s a hard forearm to Jordynne’s face. The hanging Downward Spiral is countered but Tessa grabs the Codebreaker for two instead. That kickout doesn’t sit well with Tessa so she hammers away but walks into a spinebuster.

Back from a break with Tessa unloading with forearms until a Michinoku Driver gets Jordynne out of trouble. A Muscle Buster is broken up and Tessa hits some kind of a swinging reverse DDT. Tessa goes up but spends too much time talking about Gail Kim, allowing Grace to slam her down. An elbow to the face staggers Jordynne but she’s right back with the Grace Driver (pumphandle driver) for the pin at 10:21.

Rating: C. Nice power match here, even if we’re just killing time until Kim vs. Blanchard. I mean, you have to give them time to set up the 194 video packages on how legendary and amazing Kim really is. Grace going after the title could be interesting as you can only have a monster like her in the midcard for so long.

Tessa sells the heck out of the driver and barely moves. After she finally gets up, Tessa snaps, yells about Kim some more and beats up the timekeeper. Gail Kim comes in for the save and clears the ring.

United We Stand ad.

Tessa yells at Scott D’Amore and demands something be done about Gail. Speaking of Gail, she comes in and yells as well, earning herself a suspension. This story really doesn’t warrant such a long build.

United We Stand rundown.

GWN Flashback Of The Week: Brian Cage vs. Eli Drake from last year’s Lucha Underground vs. Impact show.

Rosemary tries to get inside Allie’s head and find the Bunny. Allie says it’s gone and laughs because Rosemary looks pathetic. Rosemary: “WHERE’S THE BUNNY?” This is more interesting, even though we had to sit through all those losses for Allie and company.

Callihan yells about Swann turning his back on OVE. Now he’s going to take everything from Swann, starting with the X-Division Title next week.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Eddie Edwards/Eli Drake

Eddie and Raj start things off and trade some right hands before it’s off to both partners. It’s already back to Edwards to chop Raju, who brings Raj back in for a flapjack into a sliding knee from Raju. A jumping Downward Spiral gets two and Eli gets knocked off the apron. That’s too much for him so he comes in sans tag to beat up the Squad, which amazingly enough isn’t all that hard. Gama Singh gets on the apron for a distraction so Drake throws in Kenny, allowing Eddie to knock Raju cold for the pin at 5:21.

Rating: D+. The Hit Squad is less annoying than they used to be but they’re still not an act that I want to watch every week. Drake and Edwards are fine as a team and Drake getting a tweener push is rather interesting for a change. He’s still one of the best talkers in the company and it’s a good idea to see him getting this kind of a chance. Throw in the eternally good Edwards and they might have something here.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact vs. Brian Cage

Overall Rating: D+. The main event angle was nice and FINALLY advanced the story somewhat, though the rest of the show left a lot to be desired. You can only get so far with doing the same stuff over and over, but for some reason Impact is fine with spinning their wheels on stories for months at a time. There’s a long way to go before Rebellion but you can at least see the card being set up. As usual: some good stuff here and there, just not enough that makes you want to come back.

Results

OVE b. Tommy Dreamer/Rich Swann/Willie Mack – Cactus Piledriver to Dreamer

Glenn Gilbertti b. Kikutaro – Chartbuster

KM/Fallah Bahh b. Reno Scum – Belly to belly to Thornstowe

Jordynne Grace b. Tessa Blanchard – Grace Driver

Eli Drake/Eddie Edwards b. Desi Hit Squad – Kendo stick to Raju

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6