Impact Wrestling – October 27, 2022: Oh Yeah, This Show
Impact Wrestling
Date: October 27, 2022
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan
We are on the way to Overdrive in a few weeks and that means we need an X-Division Title match. The tournament begins here with the finals at Overdrive and we should be in for something good. Other than that, Frankie Kazarian is coming for the World Title and Josh Alexander will need to deal with him. Let’s get to it.
Mike Bennett and Matt Taven come in to yell at Scott D’Amore about everything that has gone badly for them. They don’t want to be in that kind of situation again, so he fires them.
Opening sequence.
X-Division Title Tournament First Round: Alan Angels vs. Trey Miguel
They fight over arm control to start with neither being able to get very far. Angels breaks up a rope walk wristdrag and Miguel gets kicked outside. Back in and a reverse Sling Blade gives Angels two but Miguel is back up with a handspring enziguri. The running knees give Miguel two and Angels’ DDT out of the corner gets the same.
Miguel slips out of a superplex attempt and it’s the Cheeky Nandos kick to knock him silly. Angels is fine enough to knock him him and grab an Octopus hold on the mat, followed by a frog splash for two. Back up and Miguel kicks him in the face, setting up the Lightning Spiral for the fast pin at 8:20.
Rating: C+. Impact has long since figured out that the idea of having an X-Division match open the show is going to work every time. The fans get behind Miguel, who can fly around like few others and make you care about him with ease. Other than that, you have Angels, who is still known enough from AEW and fits in well as a first round victim for a bigger star.
Bullet Club comes in to see Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer because they think Ray took out Ace Austin last week. Ray denies it again and Chris Bey vs. Dreamer seems to be set up. The Club leaves and Dreamer tells Ray to stay away because he’s why this is happening.
VXT and Gisele Shaw want to get rid of Mickie James and then get the Knockouts Tag Team Titles back.
Tasha Steelz vs. Rachelle Steele
Savannah Evans is here with Steelz. Steele gets kicked in the face to start but Steelz grabs the mic, saying she shouldn’t be in the ring with someone so lame. Evans is told to come in and take care of this, so Evans hits a clothesline for the DQ at 1:56. Steelz doesn’t seem to mind.
Post match Evans powerbombs Steele.
The Motor City Machine Guns come up to Heath and Rhino to ask for the Tag Team Title shot they were promised. Heath and Rhino tell them to go to management, which works for the Guns.
Post break, the Guns come up to Scott D’Amore but the Major Players are already there. D’Amore doesn’t want to listen to the arguing so he makes Shelley vs. Cardona for later tonight.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Chris Bey
Ace Austin is here with Bey. They both miss clotheslines to start and Bey can’t hit his spinning kick to the face. Cue Bully Ray to get on the apron to yell at Austin as we take an early break. Back with Bey hitting a double stomp to the back and a standing moonsault gets two.
Dreamer’s arm goes into the post and Bey gives it a Codebreaker, setting up a DDT for two more. Bey gets caught on top though and here is Moose to yell at Ray. The referee gets distracted and Moose trips Bey, who thinks it was Ray. The Death Valley Driver is broken up and the Art of Finesse finishes for Bey at 10:24.
Rating: C. The ending was a huge relief as I was worried they would have the ECW guys beat the Bullet Club again. I’m not big on Dreamer in the first place and it would have been way too far to have he and Ray get wins over these guys in some combination -over back to back wins. Not a great match, but it’s all about the storytelling anyway.
Flashback Moment of the Week: Bully Ray b. Sting to retain the World Title at Slammiversary 2013.
Aussie Open wants the Tag Team Titles so anyone can come get them next week.
Tommy Dreamer tells Bully Ray to calm down but Ray isn’t going to do that. He’s tired of no one believing him, including Dreamer. They’re good though.
Matt Cardona vs. Alex Shelley
Their respective partners are here too. Cardona jumps him before the bell and they head outside with an exchange of rams into the apron. Back in and Shelley works on the arm but Cardona grabs a neckbreaker for two. The chinlock goes on for a bit before an elbow to the jaw takes Shelley down again. The Reboot misses though and they forearm it out. A tornado DDT gives Shelley two with Myers putting the foot on the rope.
Myers comes in so Sabin kicks him out, leaving Cardona to rake Shelley’s eye. Radio Silence connects for two and a rollup with tights gets the same. With nothing else working, Cardona grabs the Digital Media Title but the referee gets distracted, allowing Shelley to grab a DDT onto the title for two in a rather hot near fall. Back up and Myers hits Shelley in the head with the belt for the pin at 8:43.
Rating: C+. There was a lot packed in here but they made it work well enough anyway, with both guys keeping up with all of the quick near falls. The Major Brothers getting the title shot isn’t a bad idea, though it wouldn’t surprise me to see this winding up as a triple threat. Entertaining stuff here as the Major Players are a good team when they get the chance.
Post match the beatdown stays on but Heath and Rhino make the save.
Rich Swann and Josh Alexander are in the back when Gail Kim interrupts. She tells Alexander to watch his back and Steve Maclin jumps him from behind. Frankie Kazarian makes the save.
Post break, Kazarian says he’s looking out for Alexander to make sure Overdrive stays on. Neither of them are looking for a partner, but they’ll team together against Aussie Open next week.
Raj Singh vs. Joe Hendry
Before the match, Hendry talks about how this is Las Vegas, where people lose everything they have every day. Tomorrow, someone is going to have to tell their wife that they lost the house, the car and the kid’s college fund….but he saw Joe Hendry. It’s ok because the wife believes in him too and we start fast with Hendry taking him down for a pat on the head. A fireman’s carry faceplant (the Trust Fall) drops Singh, who makes the mistake of saying Hendry’s name, making him rise back up. The Standing Ovation (high spinebuster) gives Hendry the pin at 1:47.
Eric Young tells Deaner that he’s supposed to learn things. Now it’s time to beat up beat up Sami Callihan.
We get a sitdown interview with Eddie Edwards, who says Honor No More is no more. Eddie still believes that there is no honor in this company but there are still problems. Like PCO.
Here’s what’s coming on upcoming shows.
VXT/Gisele Shaw vs. Mickie James/Jordynne Grace/Taylor Wilde
Green rolls away from James to start so it’s off to Shaw instead. James runs her over with a shoulder and it’s off to Purrazzo to power Wilde down. Wilde kicks Purrazzo’s leg out and tilt-a-whirl slams Green for two. Everything breaks down and the heroes clear the ring as we take a break.
Back with Green taking Wilde down and hammering away before Shaw fires off some knees to the face. Wilde gets away without much trouble and the hot tag brings in James to clean house. That lasts for all of ten seconds before Shaw gets in a cheap shot to take James down in the corner. Shaw grabs a chinlock before Shaw grabs a chinlock, only to have James fight up with a clothesline.
The real hot tag brings in Grace to clean house, including a spinebuster for two on Purrazzo. Everything breaks down but James gets driven back into the corner. A powerbomb/something like a Blockbuster combination gets two on James and Grace runs Shaw over for touching the Knockouts Title. Back inside and James DDTs Green for the pin at 15:17.
Rating: C+. They kept things moving here with a longer match than I would have guessed. James is probably on her way to a huge showdown with Jordynne Grace, maybe at Hard To Kill, and she might have to go through the rest of VXT to get there. Good main event here, as Grace and James are turning into some of the bigger stars in the whole company.
Overall Rating: C+. Overdrive isn’t exactly looking great so far but they are doing some good stuff on the way there. That is the kind of thing that you do not get to see very often but they are managing to pull it off. There were some good enough matches on this one, though the Bully Ray/Tommy Dreamer stuff is still dragging a lot of the rest down.
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Impact Wrestling – March 22, 2019: I’m Sure There’s No Connection
IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling
Impact Wrestling Date: March 22, 2019 Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gambling Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews
It’s title time as Rich Swann defends the X-Division Title against Sami Callihan, who is ticked off over Swann turning down the chance to join OVE. Other than that we’re likely to get some fallout from Johnny Impact turning heel last week, which is probably best for everyone. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap looks at everything going on around here, including Moose beating up the Rascalz, Jordynne Grace becoming #1 contender and the World Title situation.
Opening sequence.
Moose vs. Trey Miguel
Fallout from the Rascalz making fun of their clothes and not getting anywhere with Melissa Santos. Miguel goes for the legs to start and actually pulls off a hurricanrana. Moose gets sent to the floor a few times but a suicide dive won’t even put him off his feet. The second attempt is countered into a release apron bomb but Trey slips out of another one and kicks Moose in the face. Something like a 619 is countered with a swing into the steps (geez) and Moose hammers at the head inside.
A heck of a clothesline looks to set up a superplex but Moose slips out and hits a quick superkick. There’s a missile dropkick to send Moose outside for the required flip dive as we keep up with the all the required big man vs. little man tropes. Moose isn’t really phased by a frog splash but the discus lariat misses. An enziguri gives Trey two but Moose has had it and sends him into the post twice in a row. The No Jackhammer Needed spear finishes Miguel at 9:22.
Rating: C+. This was a fun big vs. little match and it’s not like the Rascalz are hurt by losing to a main event star. There’s a good chance that the feud isn’t done and that’s not a bad thing, as anything that gives the Rascalz a potentially big win is a positive thing. They’re that good and I could go for a lot more of them.
Sami Callihan isn’t sure how he’s going to hurt Rich Swann but he’s walking out as champion.
Tessa Blanchard says Impact is completely responsible for Gail Kim’s actions. First up, Kim needs to make a public apology.
The announcers preview the show.
KM/Fallah Bahh vs. Eli Drake/Eddie Edwards
Bahh shoulders Drake down to start and we go to a gator roll to keep him in trouble. KM comes in and doesn’t do as well, allowing a tag off to Eddie to crank on the arm. A superkick to the ribs cuts KM off as everything breaks down. Drake puts KM on top for a superplex but Bahh runs Drake over. That earns him a trip to the floor and a suicide dive from Eddie. That means it’s Kenny time but Eddie gets caught. That’s fine as he throws it to Drake and since the referees aren’t that bright, KM takes a shot to the head and it’s the Boston Knee Party for the pin at 4:59.
Rating: D+. Edwards and Drake continue their nice roll as a team and that seems likely to set them up for a title shot, likely at Rebellion. The Lucha Bros and LAX are both awesome but you can only have those two fight for so long until they need something else. Then again there’s always the chance that Drake turns on him, which would seem to be his nature.
Taya Valkyrie grabs Melendez (the annoying interviewer) by the throat for asking why Johnny Impact turned on Brian Cage last week.
GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: Jeff Hardy vs. Mr. Anderson from Against All Odds (though this might just be the international version, as the American show might have aired Fenix vs. Brian Cage from the Impact vs. Lucha Underground show last year).
Melendez gets thrown in the trash for being annoying.
Swann tells Willie Mack that he’ll be one on one with Sami tonight. Mack promises to take care of OVE but here’s Ethan Page to say he’s coming for Mack tonight.
Ace Austin vs. Damian Hyde
Ace starts fast with a trip into a basement dropkick to send Hyde to the floor. A handstand on the apron makes Hyde miss and it’s the Space Flying Tiger Drop to keep Hyde in trouble. Back in and Austin hits a springboard kick to the head and a middle rope Swanton. A double stomp to the back of the head sets up the Fold for the pin at 3:08.
Rating: C-. Total and complete squash here, which is what should have happened when Austin debuted. The important thing here was letting him come out there and get in all of his cool offense, which Austin can do quite well. I’ve liked Austin in all the promotions I’ve seen him in and having him in Impact is a good move.
Video on Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann with Swann turning down the offers to join OVE and laying all of them out.
A Knockout is back in two weeks. Odds are that’s Madison Rayne.
Here are Johnny Impact and Taya Valkyrie for the big explanation with Callis ripping them apart on commentary. Johnny has been asked by everyone from local news to TMZ. He did it because of the internet smart marks (oh here we go) who are watching this stuff for the crashes. They liked him and then they saw Cage, who got ripped off at Homecoming. Impact had to sit in a room with that moron who just doesn’t get it. How can Impact be loyal to the fans when no one is loyal to him? He cheated on the fans with himself and loved it.
As for Taya, she’s not worried about facing Jordynne Grace next week but would rather complain about how the fans treated Johnny. There might not be a title match next week because they have the power and they make the rules. Johnny says the only things that matter to him are the title and his wife. This was one of the more generic “you turned on me” promos I’ve heard in a good while, which is fine enough and not the worst idea, though the smart marks line didn’t really add a thing.
Rosemary comes in to see James Mitchell because she’s gotten Allie’s meat suit and not her soul. Mitchell says he was a man of his word but if Rosemary has a problem, she can talk to him, whoever that is. She’ll go to the undead realm and get the Bunny’s soul back.
Video on Jordynne Grace defeating Tessa Blanchard to become #1 contender.
Ethan Page vs. Willie Mack
Page jumps him in the corner to start and sends Mack into another corner for an elbow to the face. That just earns Page a Samoan drop into a standing moonsault and they head outside. Page kicks him in the face for two back inside as the fans are behind Chocolate Thunder. That switches to an ETHAN SUCKS chant so he puts on a chinlock and shouts about how the chants mean nothing.
Mack fights up with a shotgun dropkick into the corner for the running hip attack. A DDT gets two but Mack gets caught with an Iconoclasm out of the corner, setting up a middle rope elbow for another near fall. Mack finally goes simple by kicking Page in the head and hitting the Stunner for the pin at 5:59.
Rating: C+. Page has grown on me a lot in recent weeks and Mack is still one of the most charismatic guys on the roster. These two could have a very nice program or even a longer match down the road and I wouldn’t be complaining. That’s a pretty good place to be for what should be just a quick one off match like this and again suggests that the future is bright around here, assuming they don’t all get signed away.
Melendez annoys Johnny and Taya again so Johnny says he smells like hot garbage. They run into Killer Kross, who whispers something to him, which seems to please Johnny.
Video on Scarlett Bordeaux vs. Glenn Gilbertti.
Melendez goes up to Gilbertti, who is doing shots to train. The match with Scarlett is going to be one star, after six stars for Glenn and negative five for hers, making it the highest rated match ever involving a woman.
Gail Kim is going to apologize and resign from her position to appease Tessa’s lawyers. Can we PLEASE just get to the match already?
LAX and the Lucha Bros get in a rather intense fight in the hallway. Konnan comes in to yell as security breaks it up.
The Crist Brothers jump Mack in a locker room…but he’s ready for them and lays them out with a chair.
X-Division Title: Rich Swann vs. Sami Callihan
Sami is challenging and doesn’t seem to know that the Brothers aren’t a factor. Swann isn’t wasting time and goes straight at Sami, knocking him tot he floor for a big flip dive. That earns him the spit chop but Swann isn’t about to be dropped on the steps. The piledriver on the steps is broken up and Swann hits a running clothesline off said steps. An exploder suplex onto the ramp cuts the champ off though and we take a break.
Back with Swann caught in a chinlock, followed by another spit chop in the corner. The neck crank goes on and Callihan pulls on the mouth for a painful visual. That’s let go for an elbow and it’s right back to the chinlock. Thankfully Swann fights up and gets in a jawbreaker, followed by a running headscissors. A top rope hurricanrana gives Swann two and he can’t believe the kickout. Callihan pops up with a piledriver into a knee to the face into Get Out Of Here for two and his own surprised reaction.
Swann gets the better of an exchange of kicks to the head, setting up the middle rope 450 for two. A super hurricanrana is countered into a super Jackknife, followed by an STF of all things. Swann breaks that up and makes the rope, setting up a huge spit in the face from Sami. That earns Callihan a Lethal Injection but he avoids the Phoenix splash. Swann is fine enough to grab a rollup to retain at 15:03.
Rating: B. This was the big showdown between these two and, as usual, Swann showed that he could hang in the main event settings. It’s a good match and while Sami losing didn’t help things, he’s the kind of guy who can be built up again in short order. That’s the perk of having lackeys: as long as you have them there to beat people up, you look like a monster all over again.
Post match Sami knocks Swann down and grabs a chair, only to get kicked in the face. Cue the debuting Madman (Sawyer) Fulton to chokeslam Swann. Mack comes in for the save and gets dropped as well, allowing Sami to hit Swann in the throat with the baseball bat to end the show. Fulton has been around Sami before and is a great fit for a monster enforcer.
Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show this week with some rather nice matches and a good debut to wrap things up. As mentioned, the future looks promising as they’ve signed up some talent with a lot of potential and that means we should be able to get some more shows like this (if not better) in the future. Good show this week, and one of their better in recent memory. The lack of the same main event matches has no connection to this whatsoever I’m sure.
Results
Moose b. Trey Miguel – No Jackhammer Needed
Eli Drake/Eddie Edwards b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Boston Knee Party to KM
Ace Austin b. Damian Hyde – The Fold
Willie Mack b. Ethan Page – Stunner
Rich Swann b. Sami Callihan – Rollup
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So this is something kind of interesting. A few weeks ago, someone asked me to rank the current wrestling shows that I watch from most to least enjoyable. I’ve heard of worse ideas so let’s take a look. Keep in mind that these are only the current shows and the only ones that I watch, so you won’t see many surprises in here.
1. NXT
Like it was going to be anything else. This show is the most enjoyable thing that happens to wrestling fans and one of the best weekly TV shows ever. They never get boring, their worst show is still better than almost anything anyone else produces, and it somehow keeps getting better. They’ve figured out exactly how to do the one hour a week wrestling TV show and I look forward to seeing it every time. This was #1 by a few laps and nothing is in its universe.
2. Smackdown
The more I think about Smackdown, the more frustrated I get at Raw. This show is proof of what WWE is capable of doing and how well they can still put together a big show. While it’s certainly not great, it’s a show that is both entertaining and well done, which is a rare sight on the main roster. The wrestling is good, the promos are better, and there’s a fun feeling here that you don’t get on Monday. Smackdown is very good, and evidence that WWE still knows what it’s doing.
3. 205 Live
If Mustafa Ali was still around, this would have been second. What used to be a terrible show that was little more than a chore to watch has turned into one of the best things going in WWE today. The action ranges from solid to great and it has the best non William Regal boss in WWE with Drake Maverick (must be a British thing). They bring in new talent and have a formula that works very well. Plus Maria Kanellis and that’s never a bad thing.
KEEP GOING!
4. Fusion
I know I talk about this show a lot but it’s become a well done wrestling show. It’s nothing that’s going to blow you away but for about fifty minutes a week, you get a nice blend of action in front of an entertained crowd with some talent you might have be overly familiar with. They’ve put something together in just a few months and it’s a perfectly enjoyable show. Check these guys out if you haven’t, as their show goes up on YouTube every Saturday night.
5. NXT UK
This place gets a hard time, but it’s really not that bad. The problem is the way the show is scheduled rather than what they actually do, and that’s not their fault. The other main issue is calling it NXT, which comes with a very heavy burden. It doesn’t offer anything that a show like Progress doesn’t do better, but the WWE production helps a lot. This is far from bad and cutting it back to an hour a week is going to do wonders for them.
6. Impact Wrestling
Yeah seriously. I know the show has the worst reputation in wrestling and a lot of that is justified, but they’ve gotten a lot better in the last year and a half. It’s still not a masterpiece or even a great show most of the time, but it’s watchable and the stories make sense. That’s a fine place for them to be and if they can continue taking the little steps forward, they might be able to rewrite some of their legacy. Just find a way to make the main events feel epic and they’re well on their way.
JUST AROUND THE BEND!
7. Ring of Honor
This show is the definition of feast or famine. When they’re on, they’re very on and can produce some of the best shows around. When they’re off though, it feels like a low rent promotion took a TV station hostage and ran their show. The women’s division is still a disaster and some of their other stuff isn’t that much better, but they know how to do the wild matches and athletic displays quite well. It’s a watchable show, but not something I really look forward to most of the time.
8. Main Event
Yes a recap show is somehow not on the bottom of the list. This show actually offers a nice service by showcasing the shortened version of the WWE week. The original wrestling occasionally will be entertaining but this is all about giving you a quick look at Raw and Smackdown. It’s fine for what it is, and that’s all it’s supposed to be.
9. Monday Night Raw
What is there even to say here? I’ve literally never missed an episode of Raw and I don’t remember a time when it felt this hopeless (not bad, but hopeless). It’s like they’re always content with not trying anything and would rather just coast until Wrestlemania season, do the Shakeup, and then get back to coasting again. Feuds go on forever with few people getting elevated, and that leaves you with a bunch of uninteresting people fighting for nothing, because the Intercontinental Title is the top title on the show. Without getting into another Lesnar rant, his absence is killing the biggest wrestling show in the world. That shouldn’t happen, and we’re almost to year three of it being the case. Fix that already, because it’s Raw and not Main Event.
What could be lower than this?
Yeah there’s nothing else here. Nine shows a week is enough and nothing is beating Raw.
Impact Wrestling – December 15, 2016 (Total Nonstop Deletion): I Knew They Wouldn’t Come
Impact Wrestling Date: December 15, 2016
Location: Hardy Compound, Cameron, North Carolina
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash
I knew it would come. Tonight is Total Nonstop Deletion, meaning the entire show is taking place at the Hardy Compound in North Carolina. The big draw for the show is Tag Team Apocalypto with teams from “throughout time and space” showing up for one huge match with the Tag Team Titles on the line. There have been next to no spoilers leaked for this so I’m coming in blind. Let’s get to it.
Senor Benjamin tells us that we shouldn’t try this at home. In Spanish of course.
No drones were harmed in the making of this presentation.
We go to Gilbert Corsey (former OVW interviewer) who says there is seismic activity in Cameron, North Carolina.
At the scene of the Hardy volcano, Itchweeed (yes I spelled that right) runs up to the volcano with a weed whacker and shouts a lot of unintelligible words.
We go to the Dome of Deletion, a mini arena set up with a live crowd, a ring and an entrance shaped like Matt’s open mouth. The Hardys come out with Matt promising fifty of his followers appearing tonight. If they don’t prove their greatness tonight, the Seven Deities will remove the powers of deletion.
Cue Rockstar Spud to say he’s sick of all this, including King Maxel. The infant gets a chant so Spud wants to be his first opponent because the kid hasn’t had a match yet and he’s more over than Spud has ever been. Spud promises to stretch Maxel and make him a loser like his father. Matt actually sanctions the match and makes it No DQ.
King Maxel vs. Rockstar Spud
Maxel drives to the ring in a mini Mercedes because of course he does. The bell rings, Benjamin tases Spud and Maxel gets the pin in 19 seconds. Cool moment, though Kevin Owens basically did the same thing in PWG a few years back.
Disco Inferno is watching from the back and asks if anyone wants to play some poker. It should be noted that Inferno was once arrested for involvement in an illegal poker game.
The news anchor and reporter talk about how the city has been locked down. Shane Helms and the Helms Dynasty roll up in a truck because they’re local roughnecks and ready to fight.
The Rock N Roll Express arrived earlier today. They are PERFECT for something like this and it wouldn’t have felt right if they weren’t around. Matt offers them green beans or meat and invites them inside.
Corsey is taking bets on the match.
Sienna names herself #1 contender for the Knockouts Title and is willing to put that spot up against anyone or anything. Then the following happens.
Sienna vs. Vanguard I
Actually never mind as the referee won’t let this happen so Vanguard I is ejected. We have a replacement though.
Sienna vs. ODB
ODB starts fast and runs Sienna over, setting up a Bronco Buster. A middle rope Thesz press gets two and Sienna is rather disgusted. The referee gets bumped so there’s no count when ODB knocks a chair into her face. Vanguard I comes out to count (with the numbers appearing over his (His?) head) until the referee pulls him out. The Silencer puts ODB away at 4:15.
Rating: D. I’ve never been a fan of ODB but I’ll take her over Grado in some intergender non-comedy. They had to do something like this because you can’t just have some big mess all night long. Some actual wrestling has to take place and if it just has to be ODB, so be it I guess.
ODB rubs Vanguard I on her chest.
The Helms Dynasty wants to fight but Matt has a pre-mo-nition. Tonight, we will see an appalling reincarnation.
If you order ANYTHING off ShopTNA.com, you get a free download of Dixie Carter’s new song. So they’re literally just giving it away. That’s probably the only way anyone would take it.
Itchweed vs. Chet Sterling
This is under House Hardy Rules and the announcers aren’t sure what that means. The announcers talk about how the land will be destroyed if the Hardys lose Apocalypto as Itchweed puts on a sleeper….and falls asleep himself. Itchweeed is up at seven and puts Sterling through a table. The Pesticide Elbow finishes Sterling off at 3:33.
Rating: D. This is another good example of what happens when you let the Hardys loose without their medication. Itchweeed is one of those characters who isn’t really funny but I’m sure it means something to Jeff. Where else is he going to get to do some nonsense like this?
We get a flashback to Matt talking to a giraffe named George Washington and Jeff boxing a kangaroo named Smoking Joe.
TNA World Title: Lashley vs. Eddie Edwards
Lashley is challenging and shoulders the champ in the corner to start. They head outside with Lashley shoving a fan, causing the audience (who might be the 50 followers Matt was referring to earlier) to hold him back so Eddie can snap off some chops. We take a break and come back with Eddie grabbing a neckbreaker. Lashley sends him face first into the buckle with some Snake Eyes before cranking on the ribs. Fans: “YOU CAN’T BEAT HIM!” Except for the time he did of course.
Eddie saves himself from a superplex and scores with a missile dropkick. The Shining Wizard gets two but Lashley gets in the Dominator for the same. Back to the floor with a powerbomb sending Eddie into the crowd. Looked cool but not much pain involved. Lashley picks things up a bit and spears Eddie through the wall as we take a second break.
Back again with the warnings that opened the show. Edwards and Lashley have fought into the woods and the match keeps going….but we don’t have cameras. I guess we’ll come back to that later.
Tag Team Titles: Tag Team Apocalypto
The Hardys are defending and this is under elimination rules with eliminations coming via pinfall or submission. The match starts in the arena so we get to see who is in at the start. Here’s the lineup:
Hardys, Helms Dynasty, Rock N Roll Express, Decay
That’s it for now as smoke fills the arena and everyone has to evacuate the building. We see Lashley and Edwards still fighting before cutting back to the teams. Everything goes insane and the teams are outside with firework guns. Abyss: “NO! NOT AGAIN!” The fireworks going into the air and Helms tells his boys to get out. Matt appears in the back of their truck and attacks Lee so Jeff tells the referee to get on the back of his motorcycle to chase after them.
A bunch of teams are at the entrance to the Compound and Decay lets them in because this is going to be beautiful. Matt throws Everett into the Cameron City Limits sign for two (yes there are counts in this) with Helms making the save. It’s a huge fight as some of the teams get in, though none of them are introduced. Crazzy Steve snaps one of their necks for a pin on someone never identified.
Another team is allowed in as Spud is shown waiting on his partner. The Bravado Brothers (Harlem and Lance) show up as the Dynasty and Hardys fight in front of an antique store. Where did the Express go? Back at the entrance, a team called the Ugly Ducklings (maybe) enter and are eliminated in just a few seconds via Abyss’ chokeslam.
The Hardys and Dynasty keep fighting as Abyss beats up a team called Showtime. The Bravado Brothers sneak in as Showtime is quickly dispatched by way or a rock to the head. I’m almost certain we’re not supposed to know who any of those teams were though it’s not like we got a good shot at almost any of their faces. Spud’s partner finally arrives and we take a break.
Back with Spud’s partner being revealed as……Hornswoggle. Decay lets them pass so we cut back to the brawl taking place by the Lake of Reincarnation. A jumping knee to Jeff’s face gets two as Matt makes the save by moving the boat with his mind. The Dynasty starts stomping on the boat until Jeff makes the save with a double noggin knocker.
Matt shoves Helms into the Lake and it’s time for a 3 Count reunion, by which I mean Shane being part of 3 Count and yelling that Everett and Lee are no Evan Karagias and Shannon Moore. They superkick Helms into the Lake as the Bravados show up to roll them up for two each. The Express are in another ring (four sided this time) nearby and call the Hardys in for a fight.
This goes as well as it’s going to go in 2016 but now we cut back to Edwards and Lashley because that’s still going. Wait now it’s back to the Dynasty vs. the Bravados with the referee coming out of a portable toilet to do his job. Everett hits a standing moonsault onto I believe Lance, leaving Harlem to be sent into a wall. They head inside the arena to keep brawling as we cut back to the other ring. Ricky and Jeff are in the kind of machines used to get people to the top of telephone poles and it’s time for another break.
Back with the cranes coming together so Ricky can work on the arm. The volcano is going off in the background as Robert works on a spinning toehold. Matt grabs one of the crane’s controls to send Morton flying through the air. We go back to the other arena where Everett is covered for two. We’re back to the cranes though with Jeff Swantoning out and missing Robert, only to have Matt hit a Twist of Fate to get rid of the Express.
So I believe we’re down to Decay, Spud/Hornswoggle, the Bravados and the Dynasty, assuming no one else arrives. Back in the other arena, Spud and Hornswoggle go after the two downed teams with Hornswoggle swinging a chair. Spud eliminates the Bravados but gets powerbombed by Hornswoggle, setting up the Tadpole Splash. Everett pins Spud to get rid of another team.
Back to Lashley choking Edwards with a cord of some kind as Morton is still stuck on the crane, demanding to be let down. Road Warrior Animal of all people is here, asking how Morton got stuck up there. Decay finds James Storm in a mask but multiple other DCC members show up. One of them takes off his mask and Storm has no idea who it is. Whoever it is gets knocked out with Abyss getting the pin, which eliminates the entire DCC. Storm gets in a superkick for good measure. Steve wants to go add to this pile of bones and we take another break.
We come back again with the Hardys and Decay fighting near the volcano and Lashley and Edwards fighting nearby. The volcano erupts violently and we’ve got the Hurricane rising from the Lake. That means it’s time for breaking news with Corsey saying Cameron’s fate is in the Hardys’ hands.
Back to the outside ring with Decay and the Dynasty each picking a Hardy to beat on. Matt is taken to a graveyard of Hardy logos as Jeff fights back on Decay. Janice is brought in and Jeff’s comeback is cut off by a low blow. Vanguard I comes in and that means another fireworks war. Abyss takes one to the eye and Vanguard celebrates.
To the other teams as Hurricane saves Matt from a shovel to the head. Apparently the Dynasty is broken and a double pin (Can Hurricane do that?) gets rid of Everett and Lee. Matt and Hurricane bury them, which Matt says would make even the man with three H’s proud. Lashley throws Eddie onto the house’s porch and then no sells a Hornswoggle spear.
Abyss is back up but a huge Hardy symbol catches on fire around him. A lot of brawling ends with Abyss taking Matt back into the ring. Matt gets Janice though and a shot to the ribs (with some quick edits) means Matt can make his weird noises. Steve and Jeff fight near the volcano with a Twisting Stunner sending Steve into the mouth. A big explosion sends Steve’s charred body flying into the ring so Matt can get the pin to retain at 44:10.
Rating: N/A. You think I have any idea hot to rate this? As I’ve said many times, I rate wrestling, not a bunch of people running around a big field with a few wrestling rings involved. I know there’s an audience for this and I was excited about what it might be, but you knew they were over hyping this to death.
All that talk about teams breaking contracts and such to show up turned out to be the nonsense that it was expected to be, leaving us with a joke like the Rock N Roll Express, an indy team in the Bravados, Spud and Hornswoggle as another joke (I think?) and three TNA teams. Oh and the jobbers. Don’t forget the jobbers.
No one really bought that any WWE names were going to show up here and the match was a big mess of standing around waiting for the bigger names to show up. The big moment here (I guess) was the Hurricane return and that’s really nothing special. If you knew you weren’t going to be able to get anyone here (Young Bucks? Maybe?), don’t hype it up like it’s a done deal. No they never said it, but if it’s nothing outlandish, mentioning a name in wrestling means THEY’RE GOING TO SHOW UP.
I was really, really disappointed in this as I bought into the hype of the whole thing. But, of course, TNA manages to let me down and thinks that I’m going to be entertained by a joke about HHH burying people when the Hardys (combined age of 81) just beat almost the entire tag team division in less than an hour. There was no big moment, there was no big surprise and there was no big difference between this and the rest of the Hardy specials.
Reby reveals that she’s pregnant to end the show, meaningthe World Title match ends without a finish at 1:11:17.
Rating: C-. This is for the World Title match, which actually did something before it turned into a bunch of cameos. Lashley vs. Edwards has been done so many times now that it’s really hard to care about it anymore, especially when we’re waiting on the conclusion to Carter vs. Edwards. Hey, maybe we can have a triple threat! That would be something new!
Overall Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t do it for me. Basically they took a few camera crews and told the Hardys to do whatever they wanted. In other words, it’s a big Hardys special and if you don’t like it, you’re just not up to their level. This wasn’t really interesting and, much like the rest of their big matches, didn’t add anything new. We’ve seen the Lake of Reincarnation done to death and the fireworks look cool but don’t add much.
What we really saw tonight was how limited TNA is. If the best they can do is bring in the Bravado Brothers and Hornswoggle plus a few old guys who will probably do anything for a payday, you really can see their limited influence. On December 2, Ring of Honor brought in the Hardys, Jushin Thunder Liger and some big named from England. Tonight, it was some big names from the 80s who haven’t been on the big stage in years. Which of those do you think is more impressive?
Overall, this felt like a big way to give Matt and Jeff whatever they want. We’ve seen the Broken gimmick for so long now and while Matt’s acting and quirks are still entertaining, they need to either do something fresh with this or wind it down already. The show and big match kept my attention but by the end I was getting tired of it. It’s AMAZING production work as the camera cuts were all solid but it’s a case of not knowing when to say that’s enough, which has been one of TNA’s biggest issues for years.
I get why a lot of people will like it though and this isn’t a case where I’m going to really harp on how wrong they are for thinking that way. It really is a situation where you either get it or you don’t and I think I fall into the latter. There were entertaining moments but that’s not enough for a two hour show. Much like back in the Immortal days, if you don’t like this one idea, you’re better off not watching. That’s a really risky way to run TV and TNA does it far too often.
Results
King Maxel b. Rockstar Spud – Spud was shocked with a taser
Sienna b. ODB – Silencer
Itchweeed b. Chet Sterling – Pesticide Elbow
Eddie Edwards vs. Lashley went to a no contest
The Hardys won Tag Team Apocalypto last eliminating Decay
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
As mentioned on Impact last night. So, they’re actually going to spoil their first pay per view in eight months and still expect people to pay the full price for it? There was no way they could tape at ANY OTHER TIME? Or like, air a recap show and then tape after it?
These are the sort of things where you just have to shake your head at this company. They start putting together a good show and then “oh yeah we’re going to spoil it by taping a month and a half in advance.” It worked SO well for WCW back in the day too.
Impact Wrestling – March 20, 2015: It’s Still True
Impact Wrestling Date: March 20, 2015
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 4,500 Commentators: Taz, Josh Matthews
This is the last show of the European tour and they have a big main event to cap things off: Lashley defending the World Title against Kurt Angle. This is a match they’ve built up very well in the last few weeks and it feels like a match worthy of closing things out. There’s also a triple threat Ultimate X match for the Tag Team Titles, but that’s not important enough to advertise on TV. Let’s get to it.
Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. BroMans vs. Manik/Great Sanada
Ultimate X, meaning the titles are hung above the ring where they’re suspended from two ropes in the shape of an X. You have to climb up the structures at the corners of the ring and crawl along the ropes to retrieve the titles. The Wolves are defending and it’s DJZ and Jesse Godderz this time due to Robbie being shaken up by losing to Brooke last week. The champs get quadruple teamed to start but they easily fight off the schmucks and lackeys to clean house.
Jesse gets beaten down by the champs but Angelina offers a distraction to break up a double dive. That’s fine with the Wolves as they throw DJZ over the top onto the Revolution. Nice way to get the best of both worlds, if you consider Angelina the best that is. The challengers finally get things together and beat Edwards and Richards down until Jesse holds Richards long enough to nearly allow Manik to get the belts. Instead he dropkicks Manik down, followed by a double backbreaker for good measure.
The BroMans try to get the belts without climbing and actually get their fingers on them, but the Revolution comes in to turn it into a game of chicken. That brings the Wolves back in for stereo dropkicks and all six guys are down. Richards powerbombs Manik into a Backstabber for a save and DJZ gets shoved into the truss. Jesse gets some mist to the face but Edwards crotches Sanada. A hurricanrana into the double stomp from Edwards has Sanada out of it, leaving the Wolves to take down the belts to retain at 9:23.
Rating: B-. This felt like a really good house show match: they didn’t do much besides the big stuff and the titles were never in any real danger, but it’s entertaining stuff and the crowd got into it. They weren’t going for some masterpiece here and it would have been a stretch for the Wolves to have a major problem dispatching either team. Good stuff here and exactly what it was supposed to be.
The announcers preview the main event.
Here’s Austin Aries with something to say. He hasn’t been around the last few weeks and it’s because of the Beat Down Clan. They beat him up and stole his briefcase, so get out here right now and give it back. Cue Samoa Joe and Low Ki with the briefcase with Low Ki saying possession is 9/10 of the law, so Aries can’t play his games right now.
Aries has two points: Low Ki isn’t Austin Aries because he doesn’t cash in that briefcase. Second, Low Ki isn’t Austin Aries because that briefcase doesn’t have his name on it. Aries wants his X-Division Title back too and is willing to put his briefcase up for a shot at it. Ki agrees, but only if Aries can get through Joe. Joe nails Aries and we go to a break.
Samoa Joe vs. Austin Aries
Joined in progress after a break with Aries in big trouble. His comeback is easily broken up as Joe gets in a shot to the shoulder and throws Aries to the floor. The arm gets sent into the steps before an overhead belly to belly gets two back inside. We hit the chinlock followed by a nerve hold as things slow way down. The backsplash misses though and Aries fires off some left hands in the corner. Joe is too big for the brainbuster though and he takes Aries down for a Fujiwara armbar on the bad arm. Aries makes the rope and sends Joe outside, setting up a big suicide dive, only to have Low Ki nail Aries for the DQ at 6:55.
Rating: C. This was just a match to set up the angle but it still worked well enough. Aries is able to have a good match with almost anyone in the company and I like that Low Ki seemed scared to go after the briefcase but trusted in his numbers advantage to take Aries down. Nice stuff here.
The BDC goes after Aries but Low Ki nails Joe in the head with the briefcase (great shot too) to knock him cold. Aries forearms the briefcase into Ki’s head and leaves with the belt. Cue Rockstar Spud with his X-Division Feast or Fired case and it’s time for a cash in!
X-Division Title: Rockstar Spud vs. Low Ki
Underdog gives Spud the title in seven seconds. Spud deserves something for all the work he’s done lately.
Magnus is beating Bram up in the back and throws him onto a cart. They come into the arena with Bram being knocked down the aisle. Magnus erupts on him with a chair but referees pulls him off. Mickie James comes out and kicks Bram in the ribs. That’s enough of an opening for Magnus to take Bram up to the stage for a powerbomb to leave Bram laying.
The roster is looking forward to the main event. MVP says they’re fighting for his title.
Knockouts Title: Awesome Kong vs. Taryn Terrell vs. Gail Kim
Terrell is defending. The early double teaming of Kong gets her down but she sends Gail into Taryn to take over. Kong lifts Taryn up for a slam but Gail dropkicks Terrell in the back. That doesn’t phase Kong and she drops Taryn on Gail in a cool spot. Taryn gets clotheslined out of the air but Gail counters the Implant Buster.
More double teaming fails and Gail is knocked to the floor. A middle rope dropkick staggers Kong but she shoves off the Taryn Cutter. There go the gloves but she misses the splash, allowing Taryn to hit the second attempt at the cutter for two. Instead a dropkick sends Kong to the floor where Gail nails her with a huge dive. Back in and Gail sunset bombs Taryn for two but gets rolled up for the pin to retain Taryn’s title at 6:16.
Rating: B-. I’d love to see the Divas get a chance to do something like this. Seeing the Knockouts and NXT Girls having matches like this one make me wonder why the Divas aren’t given the chance to pull off something similar. The time helped here but the whole thing wasn’t even seven minutes long, meaning it doesn’t even take a long time to put together a classic.
James Storm flips a coin to determine what happens to Matt Hardy. The decision is to cause him severe pain.
Video on Angle vs. Lashley with a theme of surviving changes in life.
Angle says he’s ready.
James Storm vs. Matt Hardy
No DQ. The brawl starts in the aisle again with Matt getting the better of it and throwing a bunch of chairs into the ring. Storm comes back by wedging a chair in the corner before they trade trashcan shots to the head. Matt gets crotched on the top and kicked in the head, setting up a superplex onto two open chairs for two. Abyss throws in some tacks but Matt knocks James’ back first onto them, followed by a top rope elbow for two.
The Twist of Fate connects but Abyss pulls the referee out at two. The rest of the Revolution gets involved but are easily dispatched, only to have Storm send him into the chair in the corner for a close two. Another Twist of Fate drops Storm but Matt can’t cover. Instead Abyss hands Storm the bell as Sanada mists Matt. A cowbell to the back of the head and two Last Calls are good for the pin at 6:48.
Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one as it felt like they were cramming way too much stuff into this. I’m not even sure why the Revolution is going after the Hardys but it’s better than them having nothing to do and just wasting time while adding more people to their ranks. This one missed though and it was due to just not letting the match build and going too hard with it.
James says he put Jeff out of wrestling and has the Revolution hold Matt.
TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Lashley
Lashley is defending. We get the old school long walks through the back to the ring to really make this feel like a big deal. After the big match intros we’re ready to go with nearly twenty five minutes for this match. The fans are behind Angle but Lashley throws him into the corner with ease. A big clothesline puts Angle down again as it’s all champ so far. Kurt goes back to basics with rolling Germans and sends Lashley to the floor, but the champ takes over again with pure power.
Back in and Lashley pounds him down in the corner before starting in on the arm and shoulder. Kurt fights up and escapes, setting up a middle rope shoulder to drop Lashley. It’s time to roll some Germans and Lashley is in trouble. Kurt lets go but snaps off five more Germans before taking down the straps. The ankle lock is countered and Lashley nails the powerslam for two as we take a break.
Back with Lashley going shoulder first into the post and getting caught in the ankle lock again. Lashley rolls through but charges into a boot, setting up the Angle Slam for two. Now the spear connects for two but Lashley takes way too much time going up, allowing Angle to avoid a splash. This time it’s Kurt going up for a high cross body but Lashley rolls through into an ankle lock of his own. Kurt grabs the rope and hits another Angle Slam only to get caught in a cross armbreaker. That gets turned over into another ankle lock with the grapevine and Lashley taps at 20:18.
Rating: B+. It’s really good but it’s clear that Angle just doesn’t have the same reserves he used to. I’m ok with the title win as it feels more like one last reign for Angle instead of making him the long term top guy again. Angle more than deserves a reign like that and if he puts over a young star (which he likely will), this is fine. Lashley looks good in a loss, but the match didn’t hit the levels of epic they were hoping for. Still though, really good stuff.
Overall Rating: A-. Really solid show this week in TNA’s form of a pay per view. It’s a great way to blow off the UK tour and it felt like a major show. The big deal next week is the return of Jeff Hardy, and it’s going to be interesting to see if they can keep this momentum back in Orlando. History suggests otherwise, but this has been their best run in years. Really good show though and it’s nice to see TNA deliver when they were supposed to.
Results
Wolves b. BroMans and Manik/Great Sanada – Edwards pulled down the belts
Austin Aries b. Samoa Joe via DQ when Low Ki interfered
Rockstar Spud b. Low Ki – Underdog
James Storm b. Matt Hardy – Twist of Fate
Kurt Angle b. Bobby Lashley – Ankle lock
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1998 Pay Per View reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Impact Wrestling – December 24, 2014: Business As Usual
Impact Wrestling Date: December 24, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz, Don West
Hosts: Christy Hemme, Jeremy Borash
This is the final episode of Impact Wrestling on SpikeTV before they head over to Destination America early in the new year. It’s also the second half of the Top Twenty Moments countdown, which hopefully is capped off by someone who still works for this company. Let’s get to it.
#10. Impact – February 19, 2009
Kurt Angle vs. Sting
Empty arena match for control of the Main Event Mafia. With no one there, of course they come out to their music. Sting throws Angle outside to start and they hit that wall that they always hit in brawls. Angle goes nuts with right hands and you can hear the grunting. They go up into the empty seats as this is one of those “let’s walk around and not really do much” matches. Angle walks him back up into the seats and somehow the cameras can’t follow them, despite there being no one to get around.
Sting dumps Angle over a balcony but Kurt comes back with a metal trashcan. Kurt: “I HATE YOU!” We see some fans watching in the concourse as I realize there’s no reason given for this to be an empty arena match. A low blow puts Sting down and Angle swears a bit. Sting pops up with a chair to the back but Angle begs off a beating from a chair. He swears that he’s sorry and says he has kids, only to change his mind and tell Sting to hit him. Nash and Steiner finally come in to break it up with Nash shouting to MAKE IT RIGHT. They shake hands but start fighting again, shouting how much they hate each other.
Rating: D-. Again, why was this an empty arena match? It didn’t make a ton of sense when it was Rock vs. Mankind and it really doesn’t make a ton of sense here. As usual, it felt like Russo trying to do something to make a splash instead of making sense, which is eventually going to be exposed for the shock TV that it is.
#9. Impact – October 8, 2014.
Tag Team Titles: Hardys vs. Team 3D vs. Wolves
The Wolves are defending and this is Full Metal Mayhem, meaning TLC. Richards has a somewhat bad leg coming into this but he seems to be fine. It’s a big brawl to start of course with Matt hitting what looked like the Side Effect to Eddie on the apron. Bully hammers on Jeff on the floor as weapons are being sets up on the floor. Matt goes for a climb but Ray comes in for a save with a Rock Bottom.
Davey breaks up Ray’s attempt and DDTs him, only to have D-Von nail Richards a second later. Matt gets enziguried into a German suplex onto a pair of open chairs. Eddie throws Jeff into the air and Ray catches him in a Cutter for a 3D. They chop it out but Matt is back up to take both guys down. We get the Tower of Doom with Ray electric chairing Matt who superplexes Edwards. D-Von bridges a piece of barricade between the apron and some overturned steps but Davey headbutts him onto the barricade.
Ray saves his partner from a dive and powerbombs Richards down, only to miss a middle rope backsplash. He comes right back with another powerbomb to send Richards onto the barricade, giving Richards one of the most shocked looks I’ve ever seen. Back with Jeff taking a ladder to the face and D-Von cleans house with a chair.
Richards comes back with a chair of his own but this time it’s Jeff popping up to take over. The Whisper in the Wind and Swanton have Ray in trouble but he pops right back up for a brawl with Jeff on the floor. The Twisting Stunner has Ray in trouble and Jeff brings out another table. He bridges it between the turned over steps and the apron with the legs up. Jeff misses the legdrop though and crashes through the table, leaving him in a huge heap on the floor.
Back in and Ray goes up, only to have Edwards set up a ladder of his own next to it. Bully kicks him down but Matt comes in with a ladder of his own. All three go up and slug it out with Edwards getting slammed off the top. Mat and Ray grab for the belts but send them swinging around before knocking each other off with Matt flying into a ladder.
Davey and Matt slug it out with Hardy getting the better of it and bringing in another table. Everyone heads outside again with Matt climbing about halfway up a huge ladder to legdrop Davey through a table. Richards has taken one heck of a beating here. D-Von cleans house with the ladder and brings in the big ladder to make thing even more fun. Team 3D loads up What’s Up but Edwards shoves D-Von to the floor.
Davey goes up the big ladder but gets shoved onto the floor and head first into the barricade. The Hardys make another save with chairs and put Ray on two tables. Jeff goes up top of the big ladder but Davey shoves it over, sending Hardy into a HUGE splash onto Ray for a horrible looking crash. Davey and Matt slug it out on top of the ladder but Edwards makes a save and powerbombs Matt through a table, allowing Davey to take down the belts for the win at 23:52.
Rating: A. I came into this show thinking this match wasn’t going to be able to live up to its hype and they got me. This was an AWESOME match with a ton of high spots and some insane looking bumps. The fact that they didn’t save this for Bound For Glory shows you just how much they don’t care about that show this year. Excellent match and one of the best things TNA has done in years.
#8. Slammiversary 2013.
Taryn Terrell vs. Gail Kim
Last Knockout standing. Gail attacks in the corner to start but Taryn comes back with clotheslines to take over. Gail puts on an octopus hold but lets it go early and only gets a six count. Kim goes to the floor for a chair but has it kicked out of her hands. Some hair drags keep Gail down for a few moments but she manages to get the chair up to block a high cross body. Gail is up first and goes after the knee for a bit before wedging the chair between the ropes. Taryn blocks a ram into the chair but gets caught in the Figure Four around the post.
Terrell is up at 8 and dodges Gail’s charge into the corner, sending her head first into the chair in a SICK looking crash. That only gets eight so Taryn puts her in the Figure Four around the post for eight more. Taryn misses a charge and lands on the ramp for nine, only to be caught in a legsweep onto the ramp for nine more. Gail tries a piledriver but gets reversed into a bulldog off the ramp to put both girls down. Taryn beats the count for the win at 9:18.
Rating: B-. This was the best Knockouts match in YEARS. The bulldog off the stage was a bigger spot but the missed charge into the chair should have been the finish. It looked MUCH more painful and I thought Gail was out cold. Still though, very entertaining match and I was really impressed with Taryn here. I’d bet on her vs. Mickie at BFG for the title in a veteran vs. underdog title match.
#7. Impact – January 4, 2010.
It’s 9pm so here’s Hulk in black. Brooke is of course in the front row. Hogan immediately puts over the roster and the locker room for working as hard as they have. Now we get the infamous line from this promo: “I’ve been in the back all day.” Remember that this is after AN HOUR OF WATCHING HIM DRIVE TO THE BUILDING. That line was edited out of the rebroadcast of the show and it’s painful to hear all over again.
Hogan talks about how many new and familiar faces there are here. As he’s talking, Hall and Waltman try to get to the ring. Hogan says give them a mic and let them get in the ring. Hall and Hogan do the Wolfpack sign and Hall says the party is back. The boss tells him that’s not how it works anymore. Waltman thinks it’s the same people so it’s the same party, but Hogan shoots him down too. In a laughable line, Hogan says it’s time to grow up.
Hall says everything is changing, with or without Hogan. Wait so is everything changing or is everything the same? Nash comes out and wants to know what’s going on, but Hulk insists he’s not playing a role. Hogan says they need to do this FOR REAL because it’s a different time. Hall and Waltman are ready to fight but Eric Bischoff debuts and says they reinvented this business. Dixie Carter is shown watching from the crowd.
Bischoff says this is all about communication and that has broken down recently. Everyone has to earn their position in this company, which Nash hears loud and clear. Nash, Hall and Waltman leave and Bischoff again claims that they can change the business again. Hogan says they’ve shuffled the deck as Dixie cautiously applauds. Bischoff rips up the format sheet to show how different things are going to be. He hands the producer a new format because they’re turning this company upside down. So this basically boiled down to the same “this is new” promo that every indy company starts with.
In storyline development, Shera makes it to the top of a hill where Sotrm is waiting with a jug of water. Storm pours it on top of him and welcomes Shera to the Revolution.
#6. Impact – January 9, 2014.
TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Magnus
No DQ and both guys are champion coming in. Magnus immediately goes to the floor and does it again for a second time in less than ninety seconds. No contact yet. Magnus gets back in but here are Ethan Carter and Spud to jump AJ before any contact is made. AJ fights them off and superkicks Magnus in the ribs but Carter breaks up a Styles Clash attempt. Sting finally comes out for the save but doesn’t do anything as AJ saves himself. Magnus bails to the floor and we take a break.
Back with the two champions still not making contact as the Bro Mans and Zema Ion come out to jump Sting and AJ and giving us six run-ins in less than eight minutes. Zema DDTs AJ and the Bro Down gets a delayed two on Styles. Sting comes back in as Magnus just chills at ringside. The Brit finally comes back in and AJ quickly loads up the Clash, only to have Bad Influence make the save and lay him out with a powerbomb/neckbreaker combo.
Earl Hebner refuses to count so Dixie and Brian Hebner get us to ELEVEN people coming out for this match. Bad Influence goes High/Low on AJ for two and Brian gets yelled at. Sting lays out the Bro Mans with a double Death Drop on the floor before putting Ion in the Deathlock. AJ fights back against Bad Influence as Sting comes in to help even more. We’re down to Magnus vs. AJ with Styles getting the Calf Killer, only to have Kazarian take out the referee.
Kazarian monkey flips AJ into Daniels but AJ clotheslines him down and Peles Kaz. Now the Styles Clash takes out Magnus but there’s no referee. Earl Hebner hobbles back out (we’ll call that #12) to count two before AJ dives over the top to take out Bad Influence yet again. AJ goes up top but Bobby Roode makes it #13 by shoving Styles into the ropes. Three AA/DVDs lay AJ out for about the fifth time, giving Magnus the pin (thanks to referee #3 and the fourteenth person added to the match) and the undisputed title at 15:47. Sting was being held back by most of the heels in case you were wondering.
Rating: D. So they spent all night hyping up the match before going full Russo on it. That’s what we spent months and months building to? The match was definitely energetic but we really had to spend all this time setting up Dixie with her corporate champion? Assuming AJ leaving isn’t a HUGE swerve, this was one of the biggest wastes of time I can remember in years.
#5. Impact Wrestling – January 17, 2013.
Are they kidding???
It’s wedding time. Ray is in a tux which is weird to say the least. The groomsmen come out with the bridesmaids (looking GOOD tonight) and here’s Brooke. Hulk finally comes out (setting a record in getting into a tuxedo) to a big ovation. The fans tell Hulk to shake Bully’s hand. They get through a LONG intro from the minister and saying how much they care about each other.
No one objects, they both say I do, and Tazz takes the mic from the minister. Tazz asks if Bully is sure, then says it’s too hot in here. He takes off his jacket, and reveals an Aces and 8’s vest. The big brawl ends the ceremony and show. Brooke gets kidnapped again as Ray takes a pedestal to the face to end the show.
So quick recap here. There are four moments left and we have the following to go off the top of my head:
Kurt Angle debuts
AJ Styles wins the World Title at No Surrender 2009
Unbreakable triple threat
Elix Skipper walks the cage
Angle vs. Joe from Genesis 2006
ANYTHING from before October 2007
Somehow they’re going to screw up something as simple as “hey, does anyone remember any great matches from the last twelve years?”
#4. Impact – November 3, 2011.
TNA World Title: James Storm vs. Bobby Roode
Feeling out process to start as they’re playing up the idea that they know each other very well. Off to a test of strength which doesn’t last long. Neither guy has an advantage as we go to a break. Back with Storm ramming shoulders into Roode in the corner. They keep countering each other and Roode can’t get much of an advantage. Storm stays ahead with a superplex but both guys are down.
They slug it out and Storm takes over with some running shots. Blockbuster gets two for Roode. Backstabber gets two for the champ. Eye of the Storm is countered into a spinebuster for two. They head to the floor and both guys barely get back inside in time. Storm tries an Orton DDT but gets countered into a Crossface. Storm makes a rope and Roode is frustrated. Roode tries a superplex but Storm counters into a top rope elbow for two.
This is getting good. Last Call misses as Roode grabs the fisherman’s suplex. Storm counters that and is almost sent into the referee. The referee avoids the contact but twists his knee in the process as Roode is sent to the floor. Roode succumbs to the demons inside and grabs the beer bottle which he breaks over Storm’s head to BIG heat. It gives him the world title at 17:40.
Rating: B. This was a very solid match that could have easily main evented a PPV with about five minutes extra. Still though, good stuff here and that’s what they needed to do. I’m really not sure I like the ending but it’s TNA after all so how good can it get? The heel turn was needed, but Roode is going to have to step up his emotions as a heel to deserve this spot. Good match though.
#3. Unbreakable
X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels
Daniels is the longest reigning champion ever at this point, AJ is a four time champion and Joe is undefeated. This is TNA’s greatest match ever so let’s see if it holds up. AJ and Joe team up to beat down Daniels to start which is kind of a surprising move. Joe kicks him HARD in the back and AJ does the same thing. It turns into a contest and I think Joe wins by a hair. Daniels gets up but Joe kicks him in the face. Cool sequence.
AJ grabs a fast rollup on Joe and we’re ready to get going. They trade pinfall attempts so fast that I can’t type them until Joe hooks a modified Rings of Saturn. Daniels breaks it up and kicks AJ down for no cover. Joe chops the champ and hits a standing enziguri to knock him to the floor. AJ takes Joe down but Daniels is back in to take over on Styles, getting two. Joe chops them both in the corner but Daniels fires back with chops of his own.
Styles headscissors both guys down into opposite corners and fires off kicks at Joe. Joe is like screw that and suplexes him down overhead style. There’s the Facewash to Styles but Daniels breaks up the running kick to the face. Daniels hits a springboard moonsault onto Joe on the floor but you know AJ has to top him, so he hits a springboard shooting star to take both guys down. He rolls Joe back in for two and things slow down a tiny bit.
Actually scratch that as Styles hits the drop down/dropkick combo for two. Daniels comes back in again and monkey flips AJ at Joe but AJ twists in mid air into a rana on the fat man. Daniels O’Connor rolls Styles for two and then launches him over the top and out to the floor. A flying knee sends Joe into the corner and Daniels slaps him in the face. Joe will have none of that and slaps Daniels back but Daniels rolls him up for two.
Joe counters the rollup into the Clutch so Styles busts out Spiral Tap to break up the hold. That gets two on both guys and Daniels sends Styles back to the floor. An STO puts Joe down but AJ breaks up the BME. I feel like I’m talking to a 3 year old after that last exchange with all the spelling. Daniels gets caught in the Tree of Woe and AJ kicks away, but Joe splashes AJ into Daniels. A running dropkick to the face breaks the Tree and Daniels is out.
The running big boot that Joe does knocks AJ’s head into Tallahassee somewhere and the backsplash gets two. Daniels comes back out of nowhere and hits the Death Valley Driver on Joe. Everyone is down until Daniels covers Joe for two. AJ gets sent to the floor and both he and Daniels miss moonsaults. They slug it out so Joe hits a corkscrew plancha to take both guys down. The fans are losing their minds over this stuff. Back in and Daniels breaks up the MuscleBuster but Styles goes up too. AJ and Daniels fight on the top so Joe backdrops both of them down at the same time.
Joe gets up first and he looks MAD. He and AJ slug it out with AJ taking over but Joe slugs him right back and hits a big old German release suplex to take over. There’s the MuscleBuster but Daniels comes in with the belt. He charges at Joe but the Samoan hits a snap powerslam to cut that off. Joe picks the belt up but Daniels kicks it into his face. Daniels and AJ slug it out and that just feels appropriate. A blue thunder bomb out of nowhere gets two on Styles.
Release Rock Bottom puts AJ down and the BME gets two as Joe makes the save. Daniels puts a Dragon Sleeper on Joe and hooks the Last Rites (rolling cutter which he didn’t use that often) to send Joe to the floor again. AJ bounces back up and hits the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. Styles goes up but Daniels hits a palm strike to stop him. Daniels superplexes him down but he can’t cover. Joe comes in and covers both guys for two.
Joe focuses on Daniels and hits his powerbomb into the Boston Crab into the STF sequence so he can call a LONG spot to Daniels. Daniels (wearing a wedding ring) gets the rope so Joe beats up AJ a bit more. He fires off forearms but AJ snaps off the Pele to take over again. The Rack into a neckbreaker gets two for Styles but Daniels is back up. AJ hits a sunset flip into the Clash but Joe makes the save at two. Daniels ducks a charging Joe to send him tot he floor. AJ and Daniels slug it out and Daniels tries the Angel’s Wings. AJ counters into a bridging backdrop and stays on top for the pin and the title.
Rating: A+. Yeah that’s the easy answer but there’s no real other option to go with here. This was about twenty three minutes long and the longest they go without action is maybe 20 seconds. These three have incredible chemistry together and it was a great example of what smaller guys can do. It’s not the best match in TNA history by a mile but it’s the best match by a few feet. Great match.
#2. Bound For Glory 2010.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle vs. Mr. Anderson
Anderson beat D’Angelo Dinero and Hardy and Angle went to a time limit draw, forcing the three way. Hardy debuts new music which should tell you a lot. Anderson gets double teamed to start but Kurt is sent out to the floor. Angle comes back in and throws Jeff to the floor so he can kick at Anderson’s knee in the corner. A release overhead belly to belly gets two on Mr. with Hardy making a save. Jeff gets back into it and picks up Anderson, so Angle Germans both guys at the same time.
Anderson goes outside for the first time but Jeff backdrops Angle up and over the top for a bad landing. Thankfully he’s ok enough to pull Anderson out to the floor for a brawl, but Hardy dives over the top to put everyone down. Back in and Kurt puts Anderson in a chinlock until Jeff makes a save. He goes up top very slowly though, allowing Angle to run the corner for the belly to belly. Jeff pops back up, only to miss the Swanton on Anderson and give Kurt a near fall. Dixie Carter is watching at ringside.
Angle loads up a superplex but Andeson turns it into a Tower of Doom for two on both guys. It’s Angle up first to roll some Germans on Anderson before doing the same on Hardy. He wants to keep things together so there’s an ankle lock to both guys at the same time. Angle goes up top but Anderson’s ankle is fine enough for the rolling fireman’s carry for two. Hardy breaks it up with a Swanton for two on both guys.
Back up and Anderson goes up, only to get caught in a belly to back superplex to give Kurt a near fall. Whisper in the Wind puts Angle down and there’s a Twist of Fate to Anderson. The Swanton crushes Mr. but Angle grabs Jeff’s ankle. Anderson breaks it up with the Mic Check for two on Kurt and everyone gets two off a rollup. Kurt actually hits the moonsault for two on Hardy, who falls out of the ring. Angle escapes the Mic Check but accidentally clotheslines the referee. Everyone knows the big THEY reveal is coming.
Anderson hits the Mic Check on Angle but can’t follow up. This brings out Eric Bischoff with a chair but Hogan comes out (I’m as shocked as you are) before he can swing it. Hulk is on crutches and moving pretty slowly as we have to wait even longer. Bischoff throws the chair down but takes away a crutch. Hardy gets back in to calm things down but Hogan hands him his crutch.
Jeff squares off with Bischoff….and breaks the crutch over Angle’s back. Hogan smiles and Bischoff says that was awesome. Hogan points at Hardy and hugs Eric as they watch Hardy break the other crutch over Anderson’s back. The Twist of Fate is enough to pin Anderson and give Hardy the title.
Rating: B-. The match is good but this was ALL about the booking and big swerve at the end. Hogan and Bischoff weren’t really surprises so it was all down to who was going to side with the new mega heel faction. Hardy winning the title is fine and the best option given who was in there.
Bischoff introduces Jeff as the new World Champion and a smiling Jeff Jarrett comes out. Abyss follows them out and hugs Hogan. Fans throw trash in the ring ala the NWO debut (there were rumors this was planted) as RVD comes out to ask Jeff what he’s doing. Hardy lays him out with a belt shot and poses with THEY to end the show.
Quick recap of the top ten.
And now, I kid you not, this is considered the #1 moment all time in TNA wrestling history.
#1. Impact – August 7, 2014
Here’s all of Dixie’s team but she fires Stephens and Snitsky like the maniac she is. Cue Team 3D and Dreamer with a table but Dixie hides behind everyone she’s paid off. Ray promises to put Dixie through a table and Dreamer says Dixie is everything that’s wrong with this business. Mo nails Dreamer and the brawl is on with the ECW guys taking over. Suddenly Dixie is alone in the ring with 3D but runs when she’s about to take 3D.
Spud swears it’s never going to happen but the entire locker room comes out to throw Dixie to the wolves (Team 3D, not Richards/Edwards). D-Von loads her up (and grabs her in a rather personal spot) and Bully powerbombs Dixie off the middle rope through the table, in what I believe was Dixie’s first bump ever. We even get Bully’s old euphoric look and the announcers are WAY too happy to see this.
I’m not sure how I feel about this. I have no problem with a heel, male or female, taking a big bump to end a story. What I’m not wild on is how everything was announced in advance. This is going to cause some issues in the mainstream media given how violent it was, but that’s the nature of pro wrestling. It felt very scripted though and that’s not a good thing, but the ending was exactly what it should have been.
Here’s the entire top 20 in case you didn’t catch last week.
20. Angle vs. Joe – Lockdown 2008
19. Aries vs. Roode – Destination X 2012
18. Motor City Machine Guns vs. Beer Money – Victory Road 2010
17. WOO Off – Impact – July 7, 2010
16. Ultimate X – Bound For Glory 2009
15. Bully Ray vs. Jeff Hardy – Lockdown 2013
14. Knockouts Title Gauntlet Match – Bound For Glory 2007
13. Karen Angle marries Jeff Jarrett – Impact – March 3, 2011
12. Lashley vs. Roode II – October 29, 2014
11. Sting vs. Hogan – Bound For Glory 2011
10. Sting vs. Angle – Impact – February 19, 2009 (Empty Arena Match)
9. Impact – October 8, 2014 – Team 3D vs. Wolves vs. Hardys (Full Metal Mayhem)
8. Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell – Slammiversary 2013 (Last Knockout Standing)
7. Hogan and Bischoff Debut – Impact – January 4, 2010
6. AJ Styles vs. Magnus – Impact – January 9, 2014
5. Bully Ray marries Brooke Hogan – Impact Wrestling – January 17, 2013
4. James Storm vs. Bobby Roode – Impact – November 3, 2011
3. Styles vs. Joe vs. Daniels – Unbreakable
2. Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle vs. Mr. Anderson – Bound For Glory 2010
1. Dixie Carter Goes Through A Table – Impact – August 7, 2014
Overall Rating: C-. I’m just talking about the top ten this week. While last week’s had some funny moments that felt more like honorable mentions than anything else, this week had some incredibly bizarre picks. First off though, let’s knock out the ones that make sense and that I have no issue with. #9 is fine and was pretty easily one of TNA’s best matches of the year. #8 might be the best Knockouts match ever. #7 is indeed huge for TNA. #4, #3 and #2 are all fine either for importance, quality and hype respectfully.
Then on the other side, what in the world is the empty arena match doing on here? Yeah it’s Sting vs. Angle, but those two headlined Bound For Glory together and traded the World Title. Instead though we get probably their least memorable match ever which is only there because it had a lame gimmick attacked. What an odd choice that sounds like someone saw the names on a page and picked the match without looking. #6….eh yeah it was a big moment but it didn’t lead anywhere and is FAR too high up. #5 is a joke.
That leaves us with #1. Yeah it’s a big moment, but the top moment in the history of the company? Really? Not signing Kurt Angle five months after he was defending the World Title at Wrestlemania? Not Elix Skipper walking the cage in an outstanding match that was on every TNA highlight reel until Hogan and Bischoff rebooted the company? On top of that, nothing from Raven’s great run back in 2003? Abyss’ only mention is a cameo at the end of Bound For Glory 2010? He had a great match against Styles at Lockdown 2005, but apparently only Unbreakable happened in the first five years of TNA history.
Overall this list feels like it was thrown together by a slightly more than casual fan of TNA. Some of these are obvious, but for the most part this comes off like a list from the last six years instead of the best ever from TNA. Having stuff in there like the two weddings or the WOO Off (funny moment, but they showed it in the package before they aired the full thing) takes up another spot that could go to something more important. It did hit some spots though including most of the important ones, save for the top one that is.
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Impact To Remain On Spike Through End Of Year
So says Dixie. That’s not the longest extension in the world but it does give them a bit more breathing room to find somewhere else to air the show. It’s a good sign if nothing else.
