Dark
Date: September 1, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Taz

Great, Excalibur is back. I didn’t know what I would do without the weird emphasis on combiNATIONS or hearing the exact and undisputed proper Japanese and Spanish names for moves while he also gets in his jokes from PWG. Would it be too much to ask Taz to choke him out? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Taz and Excalibur welcome us to the show so I have to look at Excalibur’s stupid…well chin in this case.

Eddie Torres vs. Shawn Spears

They go with the grappling to start with Spears taking him down and then putting a knee into Torres’ arm. Back up and they lock up against the ropes until Spears takes him outside for rams into various objects. They get back in with Torres hitting a running dropkick, only to get hit in the face. The Death Valley Driver finishes Torres at 3:49.

Rating: D+. Another nothing match here for Spears who gets to win match after match and never goes anywhere but that’s the case for a lot of Dark regulars. It isn’t a terrible match, but Spears has been around this show for a long time and wasn’t all that great when he was a regular on Dynamite. That’s a weird place to be, but it might be time to try him out on Dynamite again. It’s not like this is anything interesting and it would make sense to give someone else a shot.

Post match Spears gets in a shot with the loaded glove.

Santana and Ortiz vs. Rysin/Faboo Andre

Santana headlocks Rysin to start as Taz suggests that Trent’s mom’s van was almost going to a chop shop. Rysin elbows Santana in the face but gets kicked down into Three Amigos. Andre comes in to dropkick Ortiz and a middle rope spinning crossbody gets two. Everything breaks down though and a pop up sitout powerbomb plants Andre. Ortiz kicks Andre in the face for the pin at 3:29.

Rating: C-. This was slightly more entertaining than the opener as it was more of a squash and had a guy named Faboo Andre, which makes everything a little bit better. Santana and Ortiz are another team who could be a big deal around here but haven’t had a chance near the top of the division. It doesn’t help that they’re feuding with the Best Friends over a mom’s van but I’m sure that’ll go somewhere good in the end.

Post match Santana and Ortiz are impressed by the Best Friends finally showing some fortitude. One thing though: Trent’s mom needs to stop calling Ortiz’s phone because it’s not going to happen.

Cassandra Golden vs. Allie

QT Marshall is here with Allie. They lock up to start for a standoff, which Excalibur says is Golden giving Allie fits, because Excalibur doesn’t know what fits mean. Allie elbows her in the face and grabs a swinging neckbreaker, followed by the sliding elbow. That’s enough to send Golden outside so Allie throws her back in, with Marshall putting Allie back on the apron. Back in and a running hip attack gives Golden one in the corner and we hit the chinlock. Allie fights up with some knees to the ribs and the running bulldog, followed by the Eye of the Hurricane (Down the Rabbit Hole) for the pin on Golden at 4:14.

Rating: D+. Allie continues to turn into a wrestler around here, which has taken some time but she is already a few steps ahead of a lot of the people in the division. It wasn’t much of a match but Golden got in a little offense, which is better than some people get around here. Allie was the point here though and that worked out well enough.

The Best Friends brawl with Santana and Ortiz in the back.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Angelico

This could be good. They fight over a wristlock to start with Kazarian taking him down but Angelico flips out. A front facelock has Kazarian in trouble but they get up for a standoff. An exchange of legsweeps set up one each until Angelico takes him down by the leg into a leglock. Kazarian gets two off an Oklahoma roll but Angelico gets in a right hand to the face.

Something like an Octopus hold on the mat is switched into a leglock to keep Kazarian in trouble. Back up and Kazarian walks into an elbow to the face and it’s right back to the leg cranking. Angelico pulls him out of the corner and hammers away with right hands, setting up the springboard spinning legdrop for two. Angelico is back up but the Fall of the Angels is broken up, allowing Kazarian to hit a reverse DDT for the pin at 7:50.

Rating: C+. Believe it or not, two of the better people on the show have the best match on the show in a good while. I can’t say I’m surprised whatsoever and I’m also not complaining whatsoever. This was a rather nice match between two people who were able to have a little time and get something going, which is what I want to see out of Dark a lot more often.

Brandi Rhodes comes to the stage for a chat with Tony Schiavone. Tony brings up the Nightmare Sisters losing in the Women’s Tag Team Tournament so Brandi calls him Anthony. She knows what it means to be pretty and Anna Jay only got the win because she’s part of Daddy Brody’s special team. You can be pretty but you need to be smart too, so come to her face to face. Brandi trying to sound tough is one of the funniest things this show has ever done.

Donnie Primetime/Ryan Rembrandt vs. Gunn Club

Billy headlocks Rembrandt over to start and it’s off to Austin as commentary laughs about the Gunn Club. It’s back to Billy, who catapults Rembrandt into Austin’s middle rope clothesline. Primetime comes in and commentary talks about how similar he is to Joey Janela. With that horrible thought out of the way, Billy comes in and cleans house before handing it back to Austin for the Quick Draw (which Excalibur doesn’t know, because he isn’t that great of a commentator) and the pin at 3:47.

Rating: D+. Of all the matches that Gunn Club has had around here, this was the most recent. They beat up more jobbers because that’s all they do around here, but since their entire deal deal is Billy Gunn and Son, there isn’t exactly much room for them to grow. Much like Joey Janela/Sonny Kiss, just throw them up onto Dynamite so a big team can beat them and then they can come back down here.

Abadon vs. Dani Jordyn

Jordyn is a little freaked out by Abadon, as she should be. Abadon yells a lot so Dani slugs away and slaps her in the face, which goes as well as you would expect. That earns Jordyn a running clothesline and Abadon starts going after the leg. The knee is crushed into the mat and Abadon does it again for a bonus. A DDT to the leg keeps Jordyn down and Abadon sends her to the apron to sweep the leg again. Back in and Abadon leg laces her with some right hands to the leg making Jordyn tap at 5:00.

Rating: C. This is the kind of match that can do someone some good on this show. Abadon is someone who is climbing the ladder around here and it is a good idea to have her get wins like this. Granted it might not mean as much without having her win a few matches on the other show, but for now, this was an effective way to push Abadon, which is one of the points of something like this.

Tony Donati vs. Ricky Starks

Taz is in a much better mood. After playing some air guitar during his entrance, Starks drives him into the corner to start but Donati grabs a rollup for two. Starks sends him outside with ease and takes it right back inside for a belly to back suplex. There’s a dropkick to Donati and Starks gets in a little dancing. Donati gets in another rollup for another two so Starks gets serious and Roshambos him for the pin at 3:28.

Rating: D+. Not too bad here as Starks continues to look good. The better point for him though is the fact that Starks gets to do something on Dynamite and probably All Out. You’re only going to get so much out of exclusively squashing jobbers so having Starks down here for some target practice is a nice change of pace over what a lot of the Dark regulars get to do.

Jurassic Express vs. Jon Cruz/David Ali

Marko Stunt is here on crutches with the two who don’t look ridiculous in the ring (and yes, one of those is a walking dinosaur who says he is 65 million years old). This is Cruz and Ali’s debut as a team so they don’t have the fist bump timing down just yet. Cruz tries a sleeper on Luchasaurus to start and is quickly thrown off. Ali comes in and gets chopped in the corner as the squash is on early.

It’s off to Boy for some hurricanranas before he holds Ali up for the Tail Whip from Luchasaurus. Ali slips out of the chokeslam attempt and hands it back to Cruz for a jumping enziguri. Luchasaurus kicks Ali in the head anyway and does the same to Cruz for a bonus. Boy adds a sliding elbow to the back of Ali’s head and the Extinction Level Event finishes Cruz at 4:58.

Rating: D+. I’ve given up on the hope of having Jurassic Express being a serious team but this involved Stunt having to stand around instead of interfering or doing that horrible dance so this could have been a lot worse. Cruz and Ali were just target practice for the Express which is hardly a surprise, but it wasn’t exactly thrilling.

Red Velvet vs. Anna Jay

Jay hammers away in the corner to start but gets taken down with a leg lariat. Velvet kicks her down in the corner and hits a bottom rope elbow for two. Some bad right hands and choking have Velvet down and a snap suplex sets up some forearms to the ribs. Back up and Velvet drops into the splits, seemingly for the sole purpose of Jay hitting a Natural Selection.

Back up and Velvet gets the better of a slugout, setting up some clotheslines. Running knees to the back give Velvet two but Jay kicks her in the face. Jay makes sure to look at the camera a few times before knocking Velvet down on the floor. Back in and some curb stomps set up a rear naked choke to finish Velvet at 5:00.

Rating: D-. What in the name of some random reference or term was that? Jay was inducted into the Dark Order last week and seems ready for a feud with the biggest women’s name in the company. Velvet went toe to toe with Jay here and it was rather ridiculous, especially given that Jay is hardly ready for a five minute match based on her past performances. They missed here, and it made Jay look really bad.

Shawn Dean vs. Kip Sabian

Penelope Ford is here too. Sabian uses some signs (ala Sammy Guevara) to promote his Twitch streams and his crop tops. Dean is so intimidating that Sabian doesn’t bother taking off his sunglasses while Taz and Excalibur talk about the gym. Sabian knocks him into the corner and asks why we’re doing this again. A knee to the face and a kick to the chest connects….and the referee says it was wide right. Ok then. Dean uses the distraction to hit a hard German suplex into a floatover DDT for two. A pop up knee stops Dean again though and it’s the Deathly Hallows for the pin at 4:17.

Rating: C-. Sabian is one of those guys I could see working rather well on Dynamite and it isn’t like it’s difficult to boo someone always on Ford’s arm. He feels like a mainstay around Dark though and that’s not exactly a great usage for him. It’s clear that he has some ability and he has been getting better, so let him go and see what he can do. How much more can you really get out of him around here?

Initiative vs. Private Party

Leva Bates is here with the Initiative. The Initiative starts fast and takes Quen down for a double chop into a double splash for two. Avalon knocks Kassidy off the apron but Quen fights out of trouble like he’s beating up a pair of jobbers who happened to get a gimmick. Kassidy comes in with a top rope double stomp to the back into a belly to back suplex for two on Cutler, though only after some staring at the camera. Avalon comes in for a high crossbody on Quen as everything breaks down in a hurry.

A suicide dive drops Quen on the floor, followed by a split legged moonsault for two on Kassidy. The hot tag brings in Quen for a big moonsault onto both of them but Quen has to flip out of an apron hurricanrana from Bates. Back in and Cutler avoids a charge from Quen, with Kassidy tagging himself in. Cutler hits a 450 for no count because Quen isn’t legal, meaning it’s Kassidy with an Oklahoma roll for the pin at 4:21.

Rating: C+. This worked too as they were flying in and out of there as fast as they could. That’s more to Private Party’s tastes, which might be better for them every now and then. They have been doing their thing for a good while now and while I liked them being reined in by FTR on Dynamite, it can be smart to let them go out and do their thing like they did here.

Post match Avalon snaps and beats up Cutler, including a shot to the head with the 20 sided die. They really spent all those weeks and months getting them closer to winning and then finally have them lose here? Really?

Dynamite preview takes us out.

Overall Rating: C-. I kept having to correct myself from calling Dynamite the main roster but in reality, that’s pretty much what it is. In WWE, there are people you know are never making it up to the main roster and that is how it feels with this show compared to Dynamite. A lot of these people are just interchangeable jobbers, which is fine enough, but when you have so many people with nothing to do, maybe it would make sense to drop some of them.

I get the idea of giving indy wrestlers work, but there comes a point where you’re just wasting your contracted talent for the sake of having this show continuing. It was a lot easier with just an hour and thirty four minutes (yeah just), but this could be so much tighter and more effective of a show. They seem to like what they’re doing here, but we are long past the point where you can see the divide between the two levels of the talent. There are some who float back and forth, but if they’re good enough to be on Dynamite full time, they probably shouldn’t be here, in what is effectively a training ground.

Results

Shawn Spears b. Eddie Torres – Death Valley Driver

Santana and Ortiz b. Rysin/Faboo Andre – Kick to Andre’s face

Allie b. Cassandra Golden – Down The Rabbit Hole

Frankie Kazarian b. Angelico – Reverse DDT

Gunn Club b. Donnie Primetime/Ryan Rembrandt – Quick Draw to Primetime

Abadon b. Dani Jordyn – Leg lace

Ricky Starks b. Tony Donati – Roshambo

Jurassic Express b. Jon Cruz/David Ali – Extinction Level Event to Cruz

Anna Jay b. Red Velvet – Rear naked choke

Kip Sabian b. Shawn Dean – Deathly Hallows

Private Party b. Initiative – Oklahoma roll to Cutler

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Dark
Date: August 25, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Taz, Tony Schiavone, Veda Scott

I’m not sure what to expect from this show as it might be the last show without fans, but at the same time it is a thirteen match card that lasts an hour and fifty eight minutes. Yes I mention the time and the amount of matches every week, but given how this show goes, what else am I supposed to talk about on a show made of squash matches? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Announcers’ welcome.

Storm Thomas/Demitri Jackson vs. Best Friends

Orange Cassidy is here too. Chuck headlocks Thomas to start and drops him with a sunset flip. It’s off to Jackson, who is chopped in the corner by Trent. A Meteora drops Jackson again and a hanging northern lights suplex makes it worse. Chuck comes back in but gets kicked in the back so Jackson can take him into the corner. A knee out of the corner allows Chuck to get over for the tag to Trent and a tornado DDT drops Jackson. The spear on the floor keeps Jackson in trouble and it’s time for the Big Hug. Back to back piledrivers give Chuck the pin on Jackson at 5:57.

Rating: C-. Not too bad here and that’s as high of a bit of praise as I am usually going to give a Best Friends match. They have a thing that they do and they do it well enough, but at the same time they have done that thing over and over for months now. At least they kept it short enough here and that’s how something like this should be.

Shawn Spears vs. Jessy Sorensen

Tully Blanchard is here with Spears. A headlock takes Sorensen down to start but Jessy fights up with a drive into the corner. There’s a dropkick to put Spears on the floor, meaning it’s time for a meeting with Blanchard. Back in and they trade chops in the corner until Spears hits a dropkick in the back of the head. Spears drops him hard onto the apron but a piledriver is blocked and Sorensen grabs a cutter. The tornado DDT is blocked though and Spears hits the Death Valley Driver for the pin at 5:37.

Rating: C-. Another watchable match and another week with Spears staying on the same show despite commentary telling us how great he is. I haven’t seen him do that on a bigger stage and while that isn’t the worst thing, there are probably better places for him. Like putting people over on the main roster. Maybe that’s coming, but for now it isn’t exactly doing all that much.

Red Velvet vs. Mel

The bigger Mel backs her into the corner but Velvet ducks and slugs away with forearms. Some kicks to the leg stagger Mel but a side slam takes her down in a hurry. Velvet gets in a kick to the head and goes up, where she dives straight into a choke spinebuster to give Mel the pin at 2:35.

D3 vs. Lance Archer

Jake Roberts is here with Archer, who brings out a rather large man and kicks him in the face before the bell. D3 gets kicked in the face at the bell and there are some hard whips into the corner. Archer tells him to throw some punches and then punches D3 much harder. One heck of a chokeslam gets two so Archer rips at his face. D3’s forearm out of the corner doesn’t do much good as the Black Out into the EBD Claw is good for the pin at 2:46. They have Archer and Brodie Lee on the same show and they pick Lee to destroy Cody?

Luther/Serpentico vs. Initiative

Leva Bates is here with the Initiative. The villains (the non-librarians in this case) take Avalon into the corner to start to work on his arm but it’s quickly off to Cutler. The pace picks up with Cutler taking Serpentico down so Avalon can get two. They keep up the fast tags as Cutler comes back in, only to have Luther slam Serpentico onto him a few times for some near falls.

As Taz talks about Luther having breath that smells like a dead possum, Avalon comes in off the hot tag and gets to clean house for what must have been a good fifteen seconds before Serpentico suplexes him down. Leva isn’t happy but the distraction means that Avalon’s quick rollup only gets two on Luther. Everything breaks down and Cutler’s elbow sets up Avalon’s top rope splash for two. Leva slips Avalon the book but he hits Cutler by mistake. Luther powerbombs Avalon onto the barricade and it’s a Doomsday Meteora to finish Cutler at 8:47.

Rating: C. They’re doing a nice job with building up the Initiative to win a match, though I still wonder why they have jobs if wins and losses matter around here (which is the case for a lot of people). The match itself wasn’t half bad and they made you think that the win could finally come, even if the win wasn’t going to mean much over Luther and Serpentico. Not too bad here actually.

Nyla Rose vs. KiLynn King

Vickie Guerrero is here with Rose. King slugs away to start but gets grabbed by the throat for a toss to the floor. A forearm to the face lets Rose bend her around the post but King pulls Rose face first into the post. Back in and Rose’s spinebuster gets two and King’s something close to a Samoan drop is good for the same. Vickie shoves King off the top though and the Beast Bomb finishes at 4:01.

Rating: D+. King is someone who has shown some potential though there is only so much to be gained out of jobbing on Dark. That being said, I’m not sure how much Rose is getting out of needing Vickie to help her beat someone who has never won a match. This wasn’t quite a squash but it also wasn’t all that good either, making it perfect for this show.

Post match Vickie names their pairing the Vicious Vixens. The two of them needed a name?

Gunn Club vs. Baron Black/Frank Stone

Black and Austin start things off with the Gunn being taken down with a headlock. That’s broken up for some shots to Black’s face and Billy comes in for a double Russian legsweep into a legdrop. Stone comes in to block Austin’s armdrag and get two off a tilt-a-whirl slam. A suplex gets the same and a belly to back version gets the third two in a row. Austin kicks him away and makes the hot tag to Billy to clean house but Black is ready for the Fameasser. Everything breaks down and Austin’s hiptoss neckbreaker (the Quick Draw) finishes Black at 6:10.

Rating: D+. Is Billy Gunn really enough of a draw to warrant keeping him around for these matches? I like the Quick Draw a bit but it’s not like Austin has anything that makes him stand out whatsoever. They have been doing the same matches for weeks now and it isn’t like they’re great in the first place. This is the first thing I would cut from each Dark and that’s not a good place to be.

Heather Monroe vs. Penelope Ford

Kip Sabian is here too. They armdrag each other down a bit until Monroe walks the corner to take her down. Sabian busts out a pair of leaf blowers for a distraction though and it’s time to choke on the ropes. That lets Ford get in a quick kiss and the fisherman’s suplex is countered as a result (Maybe?). A second attempt is countered into a small package for two on Ford and Monroe grabs a Backstabber for two. Ford sends her hard into the corner for the handspring elbow and more elbows to the face have Monroe in trouble. Now the fisherman’s suplex can finish Monroe at 4:40.

Rating: D+. Another case where there is no backstory, no action that is overly memorable and nothing that they haven’t done in almost all of their previous matches. Ford is someone who has gotten better in the ring but it isn’t like she is doing anything that is changing anything around here. More of the same, as always.

Santana and Ortiz vs. Metro Brothers

The Brothers have been on NXT before and they’re greasers. Thankfully the Brothers are named (Chris and JC), though we aren’t told which is which so it doesn’t mean much. Ortiz headlocks and knees let’s say JC to start but gets headlocked down for the escape. The slugout annoys Ortiz and it’s a powerslam to take JC down.

Santana comes in for a standing senton into a backsplash. Three Amigos connect as Taz makes sure that Tony is still here. Ortiz’s DDT plants JC and he allows the tag off to Chris, who is suplexed down in a hurry. A middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb and there’s a Liger Bomb for a bonus. Santana kicks Chris in the face and Ortiz gets the pin at 5:35.

Rating: C-. Some of that was due to it being an actual squash and some if it is due to liking Santana and Ortiz. Or for making me think of Deuce N Domino, who weren’t good but they looked like Fonzie which is an improvement. Again it was nice to see a more proper squash, which doesn’t happen enough around here.

Post match the Best Friends run in to beat down Santana and Ortiz. They brawl out of the arena and into the parking lot with Chuck being suplexed onto a trashcan to get rid of him.

Ricky Starks vs. Shawn Dean

This could be good and Taz is rather excited. A shoulder drops Starks to start and Dean grabs a headlock. Back up and Dean misses a shoulder from the apron and gets kneed in the face. The standing Coffin Drop gives Starks one but a slap to the face just annoys Dean. The slugout goes to Dean and he hits a running knee in the corner. A running boot misses though and Starks hits Roshambo for the pin at 4:07.

Rating: D+. I’m getting tired of saying this but it was just a match and not a memorable one at that. Dean continues to be one of the better jobbers to the stars around here, which isn’t exactly the highest praise. Starks is probably going to face Darby Allin at All Out while Dean is 0-14. Such is life around here.

Jake Hager vs. Marko Stunt

Oh sure this needed to air. Hager lets him grab a headlock and Stunt is stupid enough to do it, earning himself a big toss to the ropes. Stunt avoids a shot and dances before ducking a big boot. Hager drives him into the corner and hits a heck of a toss before driving a knee into Stunt’s chest. Now the big boot connects and the Rock Bottom into the head and arm choke finishes Stunt at 3:35.

Rating: D. So remember all those other times when Stunt has gotten squashed by a monster? This is the latest one as it added nothing to either of them, didn’t showcase anything new, and made me watch Stunt do his stupid dance, which thankfully has finally started to die off in pop culture. This was even higher than the Gunn Club on stuff that didn’t need to be here and just extended an already long show.

Post match Hager goes after him again but the rest of the Jurassic Express makes the save.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Kip Sabian

Penelope Ford is here again. Sabian takes him down by the arm and gets to pose a bit. That’s broken up so we hit the chain wrestling with Kazarian winding up on top with a headlock. Kazarian’s hammerlock is broken up as commentary talks about how obvious it is that Ford is going to interfere later on. A knee down onto the arm has Sabian in more trouble so he comes up with a poke to the eye.

We hit the headlock on Kazarian as Tony thinks Taz is extra aggressive because of how much he has been yelled at on commentary before. A trip from Ford causes Kazarian to be sent outside and it’s a series of stomps in the corner back inside. Sabian rolls him into a reverse Koji Clutch but Kazarian makes it over to the ropes. As Taz and Veda agree about hanging onto the ropes for 4.9, Kazarian fights up and gets two off a rollup.

They fight to the apron for a slugout until Kazarian head back inside. Sabian is pulled into a slingshot cutter for two with Ford pulling his feet onto the ropes like a good manager should. Kip gets in a knee to the face and a discus punch but something like a fisherman’s suplex doesn’t work. Instead Kazarian grabs a reverse DDT for the pin at 9:39.

Rating: C+. That’s the match of the night by a mile so far and that isn’t surprising. Sabian might not be the highest profile name on the show but he does his thing and looks good doing it, which is all you can ask. Kazarian is beyond a good hand as he can have a solid match with anyone but more importantly he can elevate anyone, which is a heck of a trick.

Joey Janela/Sonny Kiss vs. Hybrid 2

Kiss headscissors Evans down to start and Janela comes in with an ax handle to the arm. A knee to the ribs and a forearm to the back of Janela’s head cuts him off though as we hit the preview for Dynamite instead of talking about the match. Angelico comes in and gets forearmed in the corner as Janela screams a lot.

Janela’s clothesline gives Sonny two but Angelico pulls him face first into the middle buckle. It’s back to Evans for a quick suplex and the stomping is on in the corner. Angelico grabs the inverted Figure Four and Janela’s attempted save lets Evans stomp away. A lot of ranting from Angelico almost allows the tag to Janela but Evans makes the save and chokes a bit.

Kiss flips away from Evans and makes the hot tag to Janela for a suplex. Janela makes Angelico DDT Evans (erg) and a blind tag brings Kiss back in. A front flip double stomp hits Evans on the apron and Janela adds a Death Valley Driver. Sonny moonsaults onto Angelico on the floor but a 450 only gets two. Angelico gets in a cheap shot on Kiss though and it’s the flipping backslide to give Evans the pin at 8:47.

Rating: D+. This was what you would come to expect as the Hybrid 2 continue their build back to mediocrity. Janela and Kiss continue to be fine as a middle of the road team at best, which is about all you can expect from them. The match wasn’t the worst, but it’s exactly what you would expect from these four.

The Dynamite preview wraps us up.

Overall Rating: D+. And that’s Dark for the week with nothing out of the ordinary. There was some watchable stuff in here but when you’re practically at two hours, everything is going to be lost in the shuffle. There was probably a month’s worth of shows in here and maybe two or three of the matches had some drama.

Why not mix us some of the matches so that the jobbers face each other and you can build one of them up? They keep hyping up Dean and he’s 0-14. If he had beaten some of the jobbers and was say 5-9 instead, how much more interest would there be against a lower level guy? It might do some good, but this show seems much more interested in pumping out content, which isn’t the best way to go about things. That’s what we’re getting though, and we’re getting a lot of it.

Results

Best Friends b. Storm Thomas/Demitri Jackson – Piledriver to Jackson

Shawn Spears b. Jessy Sorensen – Death Valley Driver

Mel b. Red Velvet – Choke spinebuster

Lance Archer b. D3 – EBD Claw

Serpentico/Luther b. Initiative – Doomsday Meteora to Cutler

Nyla Rose b. KiLynn King – Beast Bomb

Gunn Club b. Frank Stone/Baron Black – Quick Draw to Black

Penelope Ford b. Heather Monroe – Fisherman’s suplex

Santana and Ortiz b. Metro Brothers – Kick to Chris’ head

Ricky Starks b. Shawn Dean – Roshambo

Jake Hager b. Marko Stunt – Head and arm choke

Frankie Kazarian b. Kip Sabian – Reverse DDT

Hybrid 2 b. Joey Janela/Sonny Kiss – Flipping backslide to Kiss

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Dark
Date: August 18, 2020
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Taz, Veda Scott

We’re coming up on a weird week here as Dynamite will be going up against half of Takeover on Saturday as the NBA Playoffs are moving this week’s show. I’m not sure what to expect from this show, but I’d bet on a bunch of not so competitive matches with names who aren’t often on Dynamite. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Commentary gives us a quick preview, with Taz not being pleased with Veda being taller than him.

Michael Nakazawa vs. Kip Sabian

Penelope Ford is here too. Sabian takes him down by the arm to start but stops to kiss Ford. Nakazawa gets in a takedown of his own, uses the oil, and spins around on Sabian’s back. Sabian isn’t pleased and sends him to the apron for a springboard kick to the face. That means a running flip dive to take Nakazawa down again as Taz talks about Turkish baby oil. A belly to back suplex connects and Nakazawa loads up the underwear claw, which, OF FREAKING COURSE, goes onto his own face. Sabian DDTs him and hits a hanging swinging neckbreaker (apparently the new Deathly Hallows) for the pin at 4:20.

Rating: D-. I’m not a big Sabian fan but he was one of the best things I’ve ever seen by comparison. I know Nakazawa is Kenny Omega’s friend and people have been hired for worse but….come on already man. It’s not even occasionally funny like Orange Cassidy or anything close to it, which makes him one of the worst things I’ve seen in a very long time.

Shawn Dean/Frank Stone vs. Joey Janela/Sonny Kiss

The strong looking Stone shoves Joey down to start and it’s off to Dean, who gets caught in a quick headlock. A Russian legsweep into a Meteora from Kiss has Dean in trouble of his own, meaning Stone comes back in. As Taz talks about almost getting in a fight with Steve McMichael in Joe Gomez’s bar (that raises more questions than we have time for), Stone splashes Joey in the corner and plants him with a belly to belly.

Something close to a Demolition Decapitator gets two and Stone adds a backbreaker to keep Joey in trouble. A double DDT allows Joey to make the tag though and it’s Sonny coming in to pick the pace way up. That includes the handspring slap in the corner to Dean but the middle rope splits splash misses. Cryme Tyme’s old G9 gets two on Sonny and everything breaks down. Joey’s top rope elbow into the splits splash gives Kiss the pin on Dean at 5:43.

Rating: C-. Janela and Kiss might not be the best team in the world but they have gone from absolutely nothing to something completely watchable most of the time. There is no shame in being the best team on Dark and it isn’t likely that they are ever moving beyond what they are here, at least not permanently. They’re fine enough for a show like this and the match was fine enough.

Shawn Spears vs. Will Hobbs

Tully Blanchard is here too. Spears grabs a headlock to start but Hobbs shoulders him into the corner. That’s enough to send Spears outside for a breather but he comes back in to start on Hobbs’ leg. A dropkick to the knee sets up a slingshot splash to the leg, plus some trash talking. Hobbs is back with a spinebuster for no cover as the knee is gone at the moment. Back up and another shot to the knee sets up the Death Valley Driver to finish Hobbs at 4:44.

Rating: D+. Another match and another instance where I have no reason to believe that Spears is anything more than meh. He’s fine at what he does but I don’t ever remember being interested in something he did or said. There’s a reason he never got that high up the ladder anywhere else and it is on display again here. Spears can have a passable match with anyone, but don’t expect more than that.

Post match, Spears hits him with the glove.

Ricky Starks talks about being too handsome to be hardcore and he’s coming for Darby Allin, who looks like he was raised on dog food and dope. This is going to be Allin’s last supper for messing with Ricky Starks. Old school “I don’t like you because of X” promo here.

Initiative vs. Hybrid 2

Leva Bates is here with the Initiative. Avalon and Angelico don’t do much to start so Evans springboards in, where Cutler kicks him in the head. A very bridging rollup gives Evans two and sets off a pinfall reversal sequence for two each. Avalon comes back in for a double chop into a double splash for another near fall. There’s a dropkick to put Evans on the floor but Evans takes the book from Avalon for a cheap shot.

Angelico’s belly to back suplex stays on Avalon’s back and Evans starts in with the trash talk. The choking ensues in the corner as Tony talks about having a big mustache back in the 80s. Evans misses a jumping backsplash though and the hot tag brings in Cutler to clean house. Angelico is sent hard onto the ramp and Cutler hits a Phenomenal Forearm to drop Evans.

Avalon comes in for a knee to Evans’ chest and Angelico has to make a last second save. An assisted 450 gives Evans two on Cutler and he adds a springboard corkscrew moonsault onto both of them. Back in and Cutler escapes Angelico’s Splash Mountain and Avalon hits a split legged moonsault for two more. Now Splash Mountain sends Avalon into the corner and the 630 gives Evans the pin at 10:41.

Rating: C-. Another match that wasn’t too bad with the near falls working well enough. At the same time though, there wasn’t exactly the greatest amount of drama as the Initiative isn’t about to win in a spot like this. Throw in that the Hybrid 2 isn’t all that interesting in the first place and there wasn’t much that could work out here.

Red Velvet vs. Abadon

Velvet is “straight out of your mama’s kitchen.” Abadon on the other hand crawls to the ring, as is her custom. Velvet goes straight for the arm but gets shoved out of the corner for a running kick to the face. A headbutt cuts Velvet off again and Abadon sends her out to the apron. Velvet manages a kick to the head though and brings her to the apron as well, only to get pulled down hard by the arm. Back in and Velvet flips out of a belly to back suplex so Abadon blasts her with a clothesline. The Cemetery Drive (Widow’s Peak) finishes Velvet at 3:55.

Rating: C. Velvet showed some fire here and made me want cake so this one gets some extra points. Abadon has a great look and seems like someone who could be a solid midcard villain. Other than that though, there wasn’t much to see here again, but that is the case with most of the matches on this show.

D3/Ryzin/Faboo Andre vs. Dark Order/Colt Cabana

It’s John Silver/Alex Reynolds for the Order here. Cabana and Andre (I’m assuming it’s Andre because I can’t imagine anyone else on this team being named Faboo) with Colt armdragging him down for a staredown. It’s off to Ryzin but Silver makes a blind tag and gets rolled up for two.

Silver fires off some kicks to send Ryzin into the corner and Reynolds comes in for a snapmare. D3 comes in and Reynolds takes him down in a hurry, meaning a pose can be struck. Cabana gets tagged in but wants nothing to do with a cheap shot in the corner. Instead the Order hits back to back German suplexes to send D3 into the corner for the Flying Apple. The double front flip DDT finishes D3 at 4:09.

Rating: D+. This was a nearly complete squash and that’s what it should be, though Cabana having issues with the Dark Order has been going on for a good while now. I’m not sure where the story is going but it has been going on long enough now that the limited interest that was there in the first place is going away. Cabana vs. Lee down the road doesn’t exactly interest me, but maybe they have something else in mind.

Lee Johnson vs. Ricky Starks

Starks goes with a standing switch but gets pulled down into a quickly broken chinlock. Lee grabs a rollup for two and Starks isn’t sure what’s going on here. Back up and Starks hits a heck of a dropkick but Johnson runs the ropes and hits one of his own. The trip to the floor lets Starks get in a shot on the way back in to take over.

Starks runs the ropes and then falls backwards onto Johnson (with his arms crossed to make it a standing Coffin Drop). Back up and Johnson wins a slugout and grabs a cutter. A springboard missile dropkick gets two on Starks and Taz is sounding a little nervous (Taz: “That was Veda. That was Veda.”). Starks crotches him on top though and grabs the running Dominator (Roshambo) for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: C. Probably the best match of the night so far and I can’t say I’m surprised. Johnson is one of the better of the jobber crew and Starks has been consistent from the day he debuted. I can also go for Taz as his big supporter on commentary, though it would be nice to see that translate to Starks being in a big match on Dynamite. The back injury probably kept that from taking place already, but hopefully it is coming up soon (or at All Out).

Post match, Wardlow comes out and gives Johnson an MJF campaign button, which Johnson wears to avoid more pain.

Tony Donati/Baron Black vs. Santana and Ortiz

Santana throws Black down to start as we talk about the destroyed minivan. An atomic drop into a Backstabber gets Black out of trouble but Santana pulls him into the corner. Donati comes in and gets DDTed in a hurry, followed by a quick suplex. A running elbow in the corner sets up a sitout powerbomb, followed by a kick to the face for the pin at 2:41. That worked.

Lance Archer vs. Jon Cruz/Jesse Sorensen

Jake Roberts is here with Archer. Hold on though as there’s no Cruz, because Archer is carrying him to the ring and then drops him to the floor. The bell rings twice for some reason and Archer blasts Sorensen with a shoulder. Cruz tries to interfere and gets thrown into the corner, setting up some alternating running shoulders. The two manage to kick him down and are promptly planted in a hurry. Cruz is chokeslammed onto Sorensen and for some reason makes the save. The double EBD Claw finishes at 2:39.

Post match Jake teases the DDT but drops Cruz instead.

Alan Angels vs. Billy

That’s Billy….with Austin Gunn of course. Well Austin leaves, but good thing he was there or you might not know who Billy is. Oh and that’s Alan 5 Angels because the Dark Order is still doing the numbers thing. Billy shoves him down a few times to start and a right hand does it again. Angels gets sent hard into the corner a few times and they walk around on the floor for a bit. Back in and Billy hits a Jackhammer for two but Angels is back up with a shotgun dropkick. A release tilt-a-whirl slam plants Angels but he avoids the Fameasser and kicks at the legs. Billy doesn’t mind and hits the cobra clutch slam for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: D+. Of all the Billy matches he has had in AEW where he didn’t do much other than play the hits and not exactly make me want to see his son, this was the latest. Billy still looks good but it isn’t like I’m going to go out of my way to see what he does these days. Good for him for sticking around and staying on Dark, but it isn’t like it’s anything more than nostalgia.

Post match the Dark Order run in for the beatdown until Austin makes the save with a chair. Billy: “I’M AN OLD MAN!”

Butcher and Blade/Lucha Bros vs. SCU/Private Party

Butcher shoves Daniels down to start and hits a running corner clothesline for a bonus. It’s off to Kazarian for some High/Low but Kazarian gets taken into the corner for the choke from Blade. Kazarian takes Blade down into a rollup for two and it’s off to Kassidy. A slingshot hilo gets two on Blade but Fenix comes in to take Kassidy down. Kassidy is back up with a hurricanrana so it’s Pentagon and Quen coming in.

Quen cranks on the arm and brings Daniels back in as the fast tags begin. A top rope stomp to the arm gets two on Pentagon and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Pentagon hits a Sling Blade so Blade can come back in to hammer on Kassidy. Butcher whips Kassidy hard into the corner and Pentagon adds the loud chop against the ropes. Fenix’s near Muta Lock doesn’t last long and the good guys are drawn in so Butcher can choke on the ropes.

Fenix superkicks Blade by mistake though and the hot tag brings in Quen to clean house. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Fenix trades kicks to the head with Quen until they’re both down. Daniels Rock Bottoms Pentagon and looks to set up the BME but Fenix breaks it up in a hurry. Private Party hit stereo dives onto Pentagon and Butcher. The Fear Factor plants Daniels with Kazarian making a save and it’s the suplex onto Blade’s knees to pin Daniels at 10:54.

Rating: C. The star power and time helped this one a bit though there isn’t much going on here other than a fast paced ending. That’s the case with most of these bigger Dark matches, but at the same time it’s nice to have something a little more serious after an hour and twenty minutes of squashes. Daniels taking the pin makes sense too, as it’s not like SCU needs any wins to be a big deal around here.

Post match the Bros aren’t happy Butcher and Blade got the pin.

Quick preview for Saturday’s Dynamite wraps us up.

Overall Rating: D+. It isn’t a bad show but at the same time there is only so much that can be said about a show that comes and goes like this with nothing of note. The wrestling was ok at best and I’m not going to remember anything that happened on it next week. The longer times seem to be the new norm and as annoying as that is, it’s what AEW loves to do and that’s the kind of thing you have to like if you’re going to be around here.

Results

Kip Sabian b. Michael Nakazawa – Deathly Hallows

Sonny Kiss/Joey Janela b. Frank Stone/Shawn Dean – Splits splash to Dean

Shawn Spears b. Will Hobbs – Death Valley Driver

Hybrid 2 b. Initiative – 630 to Avalon

Abadon b. Red Velvet – Cemetery Walk

Colt Cabana/Dark Order b. Ryzin/D3/Faboo Andre – Double front flip DDT to D3

Ricky Starks b. Lee Johnson – Roshambo

Santana and Ortiz b. Tony Donati/Baron Black – Kick to Donati’s face

Lance Archer b. Jon Cruz/Jesse Sorensen – Double EBD Claw

Billy b. Alan Angels – Cobra clutch

Butcher and Blade/Lucha Bros b. SCU/Private Party – Suplex onto Blade’s knees to Daniels

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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