Wrestlemania XXIV (2023 Edition): That Felt Like Wrestlemania

Wrestlemania XXIV
Date: March 30, 2008
Location: Citrus Bowl, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 74,365
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

This show has had a pretty strong build as the card has been all but set for a few weeks now. The bigger matches include Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Edge defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker, plus the Raw World Title triple threat match as Randy Orton defends against John Cena and HHH. Throw in Shawn Michaels trying to end Ric Flair’s career and that’s a heck of a card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Elijah Burke, The Miz, Chuck Palumbo, Snitsky, Deuce, Tommy Dreamer, Shannon Moore, Jamie Noble, Kofi Kingston, Festus, Cody Rhodes, Lance Cade, Hardcore Holly, Jesse, Stevie Richards, Trevor Murdoch, The Brian Kendrick, The Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Domino, Mark Henry, Val Venis, Kane, Jim Duggan

The winner gets an ECW Title match later in the show. The bell rings so Festus snaps, allowing him to toss out Deuce and Domino rather quickly. Khali tosses Duggan and Burke gets rid of Richards, only to get eliminated by Kane. Miz, Yang, Moore and Jesse go out in a hurry, with Venis going out somewhere in there.

Murdoch, Festus, Kendrick and Cage go as well as the ring clears out VERY fast. Henry throws Kingston on top of the pile, followed by Noble (who tries to walk on the eliminated bodies but gets knocked down), Rhodes and Palumbo. A bunch of people get rid of Khali, Dreamer and Holly, leaving us with Henry, Kane and Snitsky. Kane gets rid of Snitsky, slips away from Henry and kicks him out for the win/title shot.

Rating: D. This is one of those “let’s get everyone on the DVD” matches and they didn’t bother wasting time with anything else. Kane winning is a fine way to go as he is pretty easily the biggest name in the match. There is almost no reason to not put the title on him later in the night and at least they didn’t waste time announcing the title match in advance, as Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane is hardly some huge showdown.

John Legend sings the America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how important it is to be here, as well how much has changed in a year. It’s not do much a sequel to last year, as much as it is the grand culmination of a rather eventful year. Cool video, as WWE nails these most of the time.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

Belfast Brawl (street fight) and kind of a weird choice for an opener. JBL gets the limo entrance and we look at a quick recap of JBL attacking Hornswoggle (Finlay’s son) as Vince McMahon’s mercenary. As you might expect, Hornswoggle is back as well. They start the fight on the floor with JBL getting the better of things before the bell. Finlay reverses a whip into the steps and they’re back inside for the bell.

That means it’s time to go outside for some weapons, with JBL grabbing a trashcan for a heck of a shot to Finlay’s head. The steps are brought in but JBL gets backdropped off of them for a crash. JBL hammers him back down and grabs the shillelagh but Hornswoggle gets in a kendo stick shot for the save. Finlay shillelaghs JBL down and the fans are rather pleased, with Finlay pulling out a table to make them even happier.

With the table up in the corner, a heck of a clothesline drops JBL again but he goes outside and slaps Hornswoggle. Finlay goes nuts and unloads on JBL, who manages to grab a trashcan lid. The suicide dive (oh dear) is lidded out of the air and JBL even kicks Hornswoggle down. Back in and a trashcan shot to the head puts JBL down for a change, setting up the spear through the table. Finlay grabs the steps but JBL knocks out his knee, sending Finlay face first into them. The Clothesline From JBL finishes Finlay off.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t a classic but they beat each other up rather well and started the show off pretty well. It’s a bit weird to see JBL win as the villain comes out on top, but at the same time he’s a much bigger star than Finlay. Even from fighting underneath, Finlay beating JBL would have been a big upset. It might have been the better result though, but at least it was a solid opener.

Kim Kardashian is the guest host and talks about the Money In The Bank ladder match. Mr. Kennedy interrupts to say he’ll win again this year to become the first ever back to back winner. Kardashian laughs at him repeating his name.

John Morrison vs. Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Money In The Bank. Everyone but MVP bails to the floor to go for a ladder to start, leaving MVP to steal one of the ladder that slides in. Some shots to the face put various other people down but here is Jericho with the big ladder. That means a ladder off (?) with MVP being knocked outside, leaving Morrison to pick up a ladder and moonsault down with it onto the pile (there’s a highlight reel moment).

Back in and Jericho cuts off Kennedy’s climb but catapults him into the ladder in a bit of a mistake. Kennedy can’t get the briefcase so Morrison jumps onto the ladder for the slugout. Benjamin sets up his own ladder and joins the two of them, setting up a sunset bomb into a Tower Of Doom (geez) off the ladders. Carlito breaks up Benjamin’s climb and hits him with the GTS. MVP comes in to knock some people down but misses a running boot in the corner.

It’s Carlito getting pulled down this time so Benjamin Dragon Whips him down. Benjamin goes up until Carlito and Kennedy shove his ladder over…sending him through a bridged ladder at ringside. Kennedy, Carlito and Jericho go up but MVP shoves the ladder over, only to be taken out by Morrison as the carnage continues. Jericho gets the Walls on Morrison on top of the ladder (geez that looks painful/scary) until he has to stop Kennedy.

Hold on though as Carlito and Punk springboard onto the ladders, setting up the big crashes, including Carlito’s super Backstabber to Jericho. That leaves MVP all alone so he goes up but Matt Hardy (in gear) runs in to make the save and reignite their feud. A super Twist of Fate brings MVP off the ladder and Matt runs off through the crowd, leaving Jericho to wedge two ladders together, making kind of a big V (Daddy not included).

Morrison goes up and gets knocked down just as fast, including a crotching on top. Jericho’s climb is cut off by an apple to the face but Kennedy shoves Carlito into a ladder in the corner. Punk makes the save but gets Codebreakered into a ladder to leave everyone down. That lets Jericho go up until Punk starts the slugout. Punk gets smart by tying Jericho’s leg in the ladder and gets the briefcase for the win.

Rating: B. Yeah these matches can be interchangeable but dang they are a lot of fun. This was another spotfest and Punk winning the briefcase is about as big of an endorsement as he could have gotten here. I’d still like to see one or two fewer people in there but Benjamin getting taken out softened things a bit. Heck of a fun match and that’s all it needed to be.

We see the video from last night’s Hall Of Fame induction ceremony.

Here is the Class Of 2008 (dang that music is still great):

Brisco Brothers (how Jack wasn’t in already is beyond me)
Gordon Solie (you can’t forget that voice)
Rocky Johnson (complete with a shuffle)
Peter Maivia (I hear he’s a family man)
Eddie Graham (had to be inducted in Florida)
Mae Young (again, how was she not in before)
Ric Flair (who thankfully isn’t here to tell us about how great he is)

Snoop Dogg is having a great time here so far and he has found someone he sees eye to eye with, from movies to food to cars to everything. That would be Festus but Santino Marella comes in to threaten Snoop….who whips out a bell to send Festus after Santino. Todd Grisham asks where the bell came from so here is Mick Foley, complete with Mr….would it be Snoopo?

Batista vs. Umaga

Smackdown vs. Raw so Theodore Long and William Regal are here. Batista powers him into the corner to start and a shoulder sends Umaga outside for a breather. Back in and a spinwheel kick drops Batista for a change, followed by a splash to the back for two. The nerve hold goes on, which seems a bit early for this one. With that broken up, a powerslam from Umaga sets up…another nerve hold. The Samoan drop gives Umaga two but the Samoan Spike is blocked. Umaga misses a charge into the post, gets spinebustered, and the Batista Bomb (with Batista falling backwards) finishes him off.

Rating: D. Oh this was bad, as it was Batista laying around a lot and then doing his two big finishers. They had built this up as a big match and Batista barely did anything for most of the match. While Umaga had fallen a long way, he was able to do more than this. Normally I would complain about their lack of time, but I don’t want to imagine how much worse this would have been if it had gone longer. Pretty awful match.

We look at the tale of the tape for Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

We look at Kane becoming the new #1 contender to the ECW World Title on the pre-show.

ECW World Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane

Chavo is defending and loses the title to a chokeslam in a record eleven seconds. That’s how it should have gone as there was no reason to believe Chavo would be a threat to Kane.

Here’s the Carlito/Maria ad for the show you’re already watching. Weird.

Raven Symmone is very loud and introduces a bunch of Make-A-Wish kids. That’s always cool. The kids, not Symmone.

We recap Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels. Flair is still on his winning streak, as he has to retire whenever he loses his next match, so now he wants to face one of the best ever in Shawn, or he doesn’t want to be here anymore. Shawn thinks he has to put Flair down, but Flair isn’t about to go down without a fight. This include an AMAZING tribute video to Flair, set to Leave The Memories Alone. I’m not a Flair fan but dang this worked well.

Flair says his game plan is to be the man. WOO!

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Flair retires if he loses. Shawn takes him down to start and teases a strut but Flair is back up with a hammerlock. That’s reversed into one from Shawn and they get up for a standoff, complete with WOO. Flair takes him into the corner and brings up the Old Yeller line, earning a shot to the face from Shawn (busting a lip in the process).

A quick slugout goes to Shawn so he goes up top, only to get slammed off. Flair goes up and hits the high crossbody for two in a Starrcade 83 callback. Back up and Shawn sends him outside again, only to have an Asai moonsault hit the edge of the announcers’ table (as in not Flair) to do some serious damage to his ribs. The count is beaten so Flair goes right after the ribs, including a suplex for two.

Shawn knocks him outside again though and hits the moonsault off the top for another knockdown. Back in and they chop it out again until Michaels hits the flying forearm into the nipup. The top rope elbow hits Flair but Shawn can’t bring himself to fire the superkick. You don’t do that to Flair, who grabs the Figure Four, which is turned over without much trouble. Shawn sunset flips him for two more but Flair is right back to the leg, as is his bread and butter.

There’s the Figure Four again and this time it stays on a lot longer. The rope is grabbed to get Shawn out of trouble and he nails Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere. A very delayed cover gets two so Shawn loads it up again, only to have Flair fall down. Shawn’s attempt at picking him up earns himself the required low blow for two but Flair can’t follow up either.

Instead, Shawn pulls him into that inverted Figure Four of his, sending Flair to the rope for a change. They chop it out from their knees until Shawn hits another Sweet Chin Music. Shawn won’t cover so he goes to the corner, with Flair getting back up. Flair says bring it, so Shawn says “I’m Sorry, I Love You” and superkicks him for the pin.

Rating: B. This is a weird one to rate as it is a farewell for Flair, but not exactly a classic. At the end of the day, Flair has been able to wrestle a completely acceptable match for a long time now but there is a big gap between that and hanging in there on this level. It didn’t exactly feel like a classic and the drama was limited, but what we got was certainly good. The problem is that when you think of Flair vs. Michaels on the stage of Wrestlemania, you expect a bit more than “good”. That being said, Flair gets to out with a solid match on the grand stage against a legend. What more could you reasonably ask for?

Shawn immediately leaves so Flair can have the big moment. Flair kisses and hugs his family and makes the long walk up the aisle before blowing one last kiss to the crowd. Yeah it’s an emotional moment, as like him or not, Flair is still a legend and one of the last links to the glory days of the 70s/80s.

Edge talks about being at Wrestlemania VI and seeing Hulk Hogan lose in the main event. It was ok though, because it has come full circle and now he is here again. See, everyone can count on the Undertaker at Wrestlemania but tonight, he takes everything away from them, just like Hogan losing took it away from him. That makes sense.

Fireworks go off.

Maria/Ashley vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina

This is the Playboy Bunnymania match, meaning a lumberjill match with Snoop Dogg as the Master of Ceremonies. Naturally Snoop comes to the ring in what looks like a Mercedes golf cart, with most of the women following him. Santino Marella is here with the villains. Ashley drives Beth into the corner to start so Maria can come in. Melina gets sent to the floor for a quick beating from the lumberjills, setting up Maria’s Bronco Buster back inside.

Ashley comes back in and gets caught in the wrong corner. A trip to the floor goes badly for Ashley as well and Beth grabs the bearhug. With that broken up, Beth electric chairs Melina into a moonsault onto Ashley (not bad) for a near fall….and the lights go out. As in an actual lights issue, not an Undertaker cameo.

We get a spotlight as Maria (now legal) hits a crossbody for two on Beth. The Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog for two and Beth’s spear hits Melina by mistake. Ashley dives off the apron onto a bunch of lumberjills, leaving Maria to hit a top rope bulldog for two on Beth, with Santino making the save. Jerry Lawler gets up and decks Santino but Beth hits the fisherman’s buster to pin Maria.

Rating: D. Well ok then. This is one of those matches that was never going to be very good in the first place, but then it got a bit more time than I was expecting (even at five minutes) and the villains win. The match was supposed to be little more than goofy fun and you can’t have Maria get in a rollup for the pin? Just a rather weird choice and I’m not sure why they went this way.

Post match Snoop Dogg drops Santino and kisses Maria.

We recap the Raw World Title match, with Randy Orton defending against John Cena and HHH. Cena and HHH are both coming back from major injuries, with Orton having risen to the top during their absences. Now both of them are back to win the title at Wrestlemania, but Orton doesn’t quite see it that way.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena vs. HHH

Orton is defending and Cena’s big entrance this year is a marching band playing him to the ring (that’s rather cool). The bell rings and Orton hits HHH with the bell before brawling with Cena. HHH gets back up and takes Orton outside to beat him over the announcers’ table, followed by the sleeper back inside. Cena picks both of them up but HHH slips out and kicks him low. Orton is back up as well and knocks HHH down to stomp away at both of them.

Cena catches Orton up top but a HHH distraction lets Orton reverse into a sunset flip for two. Another hard shot puts HHH down and Orton hits a double hanging DDT. The RKO to Cena is countered with a shove, leaving Orton to land on HHH. The Throwback hits Orton and the top rope Fameasser takes him down again. Back up and HHH goes after Orton’s knee and slowly stomps away. Cena’s distraction lets the RKO drop HHH but Cena pulls Orton into the STFU.

Orton is about to tap so HHH grabs his hand and pulls it to the rope in a smart move. A whip into the steps takes Cena down and HHH grabs the Indian Deathlock on Orton, because of course he has to do that. Cena sends HHH over the ropes and grabs the STFU on Orton again, only to have HHH make another save. HHH grabs a crossface on Cena but gets broken up, meaning it’s time for the slugout. The FU and Pedigree are both broken up so HHH hits a face/spinebuster. Another shot to the knee takes Orton down and there’s the Pedigree to Cena….but Orton Punts HHH and pins Cena to retain the title.

Rating: B-. It’s an interesting way to go to have Orton retain, but if you want him to have him feel like a bigger main event, giving him the win at Wrestlemania makes as much sense as anything else. Orton can drop the title to one of them alter if he has to but for now, he gets the win that he needs. The match wasn’t exactly great though and felt like almost any other big time triple threat, with one person being out for most of it so the others could fight. Then Orton stole the pin, which is far too common of a finishing sequence in something like this. Not awful, but I’d call it pretty disappointing.

We recap Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr., in a package that is cut from Peacock, likely for music. Mayweather broke Show’s jaw with a punch at No Way Out so Show is trying to take him out. This is billed as the Best Fighter In The World vs. the Largest Athlete In The World and is as McMahon Freak Show style as you can get.

Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Pinfall, submission or knockout only. Mayweather comes out with his entourage and makes money rain from the sky for a festive entrance. The bell rings and Mayweather, in boxing gloves runs away to start before hitting a few shots to the ribs. Hold on though as Mayweather needs water (from a chalice, because of course) so Show beats up part of the entourage.

Back in and Mayweather goes for the right hand to the face but Show pulls it out of the air. The big stomp on the hand misses so Show grabs him by the throat on the corner. A few right hands don’t do much to Show so Mayweather grabs the required sleeper. That’s broken up so Show goes after the hand again and stands on Mayweather, which has the entourage shouting that how THAT IS AGAINST THE RULES!

The big chop in the corner drops Mayweather again and there’s a side slam to crush him. Show gets creative by dropping a leg on the arm and that’s enough for the entourage to pull Mayweather out. That goes as well as you might expect and they go back to the ring, with Mayweather being mostly done.

The entourage tries to come in and gets dropped, with a chair shot having no effect on Show. Mayweather gets the chair and drops Show (after a guy twice his size couldn’t even stagger him), setting up a low blow. Some chair shots to the head stagger Show again so Mayweather grabs brass knuckles from the entourage to knock Show silly for the knockout win.

Rating: C+. This was a total mess and incredibly entertaining throughout. There is something fun about seeing Mayweather get beaten up, even if he won in the end. It made sense to not bother trying to do anything else here than having a goofy match and that is what they pulled off. Good enough stuff here, even if it was mainly Show doing slow motion stuff and Mayweather’s entourage getting beaten up. Still though, they knew what they had here and it worked.

The attendance, as announced by Kim Kardashian: 74,635.

We recap Edge vs. Undertaker for Edge’s Smackdown World Title. The focus is on both of them being undefeated at Wrestlemania, with Edge seemingly being more obsessed with giving Undertaker his first loss rather than retaining the title. Undertaker just wants to hut Edge, as tends to be the case to anyone who has hurt him before. Like Edge, who cost him the World Title and then stole it for himself.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is defending and gets his neck snapped across the top rope to start. Undertaker hammers away back inside and starts cranking on the arm, as is his custom. Old School is broken up and Edge sends him to the apron for a shoulder into the barricade. A running neckbreaker snaps Undertaker’s neck across the top to even things up a bit, meaning Edge gets in some Wrestlemania worthy posing.

Undertaker finally gets back in, where he is caught with a missile dropkick. Edge takes too long to go up again and gets shoved to the floor, setting up the required Taker Dive. Back in and Undertaker’s banged up back means the Last Ride doesn’t work so Edge takes him back outside. There’s a drop onto the barricade, followed by the half crab to keep Undertaker in trouble back inside.

Make that a double leg crank until Undertaker kicks him away for a needed breather. Undertaker wins the slugout and Snake Eyes connects, only to have Edge hit a dropkick to block the big boot (that’s smart). The chokeslam is countered into the Edgecution for two and frustration is setting in. Back up and the chokeslam gives Undertaker two but Old School is countered again (as the theme of Edge knowing everything that is coming continues).

A superplex brings Undertaker back down but for some reason, Edge decides to punch away in the corner. The pose lets Undertaker try the Last Ride, which is countered into a neckbreaker to give Edge two. Another Last Ride attempt connects for two but the Tombstone is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. Undertaker is up again and Old School connects, only to have a big boot hit the referee (you knew that was coming).

Edge goes low and grabs a camera, which knocks Undertaker silly for….well nothing actually as the referee falls to the floor. For reasons of delusions of grandeur, Edge tries his own Tombstone, which is reversed into the real thing, with another referee running down to count the near fall. Cue the Edgeheads to get beaten up, allowing Edge to hit a spear for two. Another spear is pulled into Undertaker’s choke and Edge has to tap away the title.

Rating: A-. That felt like a Wrestlemania main event as you had Edge countering every single time but ultimately not being good enough to beat Undertaker, even with the interference. Edge had his game plan but got a bit too cocky a few times, allowing Undertaker to catch up fast. Undertaker getting his title back and vanquishing Edge in the process is a great way to close the show, and the fact that it came in an excellent match makes it even better.

Undertaker celebrates and pyro rains.

The big highlight video wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a show where there is a lot of good stuff but the bad drags it down, with only the main event really standing out as great. Other than that you have Money In The Bank doing its usual stuff, Flair’s farewell as a special moment, a freak show match with Show vs. Mayweather and a just pretty good Raw World Title match. That really isn’t enough to carry a nearly four hour Wrestlemania, leaving it as a good enough show, but far from a classic or all time show.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXI (2019 Redo): Where It All Begins Again Again

Wrestlemania XXI
Date: April 3, 2005
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 20,193
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the big one as things have to change at some point in WWE. I’m curious to see how this show goes as I haven’t seen the television leading up to it since the show aired so maybe the show will feel a little bit different. The theme is Wrestlemania Goes Hollywood, which has included some outstanding movie parody trailers. Oh and Batista and John Cena look more than ready to become the top stars in the company. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Tajiri, William Regal, Rhino, Hurricane, Rosey, Maven, Simon Dean, Gene Snitsky, Chris Masters, Val Venis, Tyson Tomko, Sylvain Grenier, Rob Conway, Viscera, Hardcore Holly, Charlie Haas, Nunzio, Billy Kidman, Mark Jindrak, Funaki, Akio, Orlando Jordan, Doug Basham, Danny Basham, Heidenreich, Luther Reigns, Booker T.. Paul London, Spike Dudley, Scotty 2 Hotty

This is your “get them all on the show” match, which was likely just the DVD extra. They’re all in their show colored shirts with Eric Bischoff and Theodore Long at ringside. Before the bell, Hurricane gives Heidenreich his own mask so Heidenreich punches him in the face. Must be a villain. The fighting starts with Spike being sent to the steps as Hurricane makes the mistake of hammering away in the corner, making him the first elimination.

Reigns is out next as the ring is still very full. A bunch of the cruiserweights hold Viscera down so Scotty can hit the Worm. That high level of missing the point could explain why they don’t get on television very often. Masters doesn’t like that line of thinking and dumps Scotty, Funaki, Spike and Kidman in a hurry. Haas is tossed as well as the ring is clearing out a bit.

Masters dumps Nunzio, though it might not have been over the top. With nothing else to do, Heidenreich destroys a turnbuckle and tears off his mask before clotheslining the heck out of Venis for an elimination. Dean and Grenier are out as well, followed by Rosey, all at Heidenreich’s hands. Rhyno is out next and it’s Dupree following him in a hurry. Both Bashams go out as the fans are behind Regal.

With about twelve people left, we get the always natural looking Raw vs. Smackdown showdown with Akio and Holly being tossed, followed by Regal to even things up a bit. Tajiri mists Heidenreich so the blind monster gets rid of London. Heidenreich and Tajiri fight on the apron until Snitsky gets rid of them, leaving us with Jindrak, Booker, Masters, Snitsky and Viscera.

Jindrak gets rid of Snitsky and hits the big left on Viscera….which staggers Jindrak so much that Masters can get rid of him. Nunzio does the “I’M STILL IN” deal, only to be tossed seconds later. Viscera crushes Booker in the corner but he’s fine enough to low bridge the monster to the floor. The full nelson is broken up and a superkick gives Booker the win.

Rating: D+. It’s kind of hard to get too annoyed at a match like this as the whole point is getting people on the show and therefore onto the DVD, which is a nice bonus for the talent. I know this isn’t the most important match but it came and went fast enough and wasn’t terrible. Assuming you can ignore the RAH RAH RAH Raw vs. Smackdown aspect, it’s nothing too bad.

Lilian Garcia sings America the Beautiful. She’ll have a job in WWE as long as she wants one for how good she can make that sound.

The Titantron is revealed with the red curtain coming up. They’re nailing the theme this year.

We get a montage of the trailers, leading to the big reveal of the final trailer: Gladiator, featuring Steve Austin as Maximus. It’s a cool idea and suitable casting but there were better trailers.

It’s strange to see Wrestlemania in an arena. That’s one of those things you’ll probably never see again.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Not a bad way to start and the red carpet in the aisle makes it even better. They’re the Smackdown Tag Team Champions but Eddie isn’t sure if he can beat Rey. There’s no superhero outfit this year as Rey has Mexican/American flag inspired gear. Rey flips out of an armbar to start and hits a running knee but has to adjust the mask. A second armbar works a bit better for Eddie and but Rey pops up and climbs onto Eddie’s shoulders.

The sunset flip is countered into a catapult to the floor but Rey switches places and teases a dive to take us to an early standoff. Eddie takes him down into a keylock to stay on the arm before sending Rey outside. Since he’s a luchador as well, Eddie busts out his own dive to the floor, with the fans rather pleased with him. Rey adjust his mask again, as he isn’t wearing the regular kind and the clasp is different, causing a lot of issues.

Back in and Eddie stays on the arm (instead of the leg because Eddie is smart, since working on Mysterio’s leg hasn’t worked well for most people) before switching over to a surfboard. That’s broken up so Rey armdrags him to the floor, meaning the big corkscrew flip dive can take Eddie down. A backbreaker gives Eddie two though as Rey can’t keep the momentum going. Rey gets back up and tries the 619 but walks into another backbreaker for two, allowing Rey to fix the mask again.

Three Amigos connect, with Rey holding his mask the whole time. The extra vision lets Rey avoid the frog splash and now the 619 connects. The West Cost Pop is countered into a hard powerbomb for two as they go back to the back. Eddie tries another powerbomb but this time Rey reverses into a hurricanrana for the pin and one final mask adjustment.

Rating: B-. I don’t know how much the mask stuff messed with Rey but it seemed to be causing at least a bit of a problem. He had to mess with that thing probably a dozen times in a twelve minute match and it was becoming really noticeable. The idea here is to continue Eddie’s descent into jealousy over not being able to beat Mysterio and that could be a heck of a story.

JBL and the Cabinet meets Evolution. HHH says Ric Flair is the wrestling god and maybe one day someone will believe that JBL is that good. A staredown over belt importance and a WOO to Orlando Jordan ends a terrifying prospect. Somehow, JBL and HHH only had one singles match ever against each other and it was on a random Raw in 2008. You would think they would have met at least a handful of times.

Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider are here.

Edge vs. Christian vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kane vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Benoit

Money in the Bank with Tyson Tomko out with Kane. Kane gets a cool entrance where the ladders on the set are on fire. Almost everyone goes after Kane in the aisle and a variety of double teams take him down. Christian tries to use the melee to bring in a ladder but Jericho slams it into his face. A springboard dropkick sends Edge into Benoit to knock them both off the apron, followed by Jericho’s dive onto Edge.

Shelton hits the big running flip dive onto a bunch of people, with Kane adding the top rope clothesline to take down the same pile plus Benjamin for the wipe out. Back in and Jericho dropkicks a ladder into Kane but Benoit German suplexes Jericho, sending the ladder flying in a cool shot. Benoit’s climb is cut off so he Crossfaces Kane and then Edge, the latter of which allows Kane to hit Benoit with the ladder.

To make it worse, Kane crushes Benoit’s arm in the ladder over and over. Edge spears Kane down and it’s the big reunion with Christian, who grabs his own ladder to smash Kane at the same time. Now it’s Shelton coming in to send Christian outside and flapjack Edge into the ladder. Shelton and Jericho fight on top of the ladder until two more ladders are brought in (Lawler: “It’s like open house at Home Depot!”), meaning it’s everyone but Kane on top at the same time.

Benoit, Jericho and Christian are knocked down, leaving Shelton to hit the exploder on Edge off the ladder for the huge crash. Jericho is left to go up but Shelton runs up a second ladder to clothesline Jericho off because he can do something like that. Christian knocks Shelton off the ladder as Kane returns from the short term death that afflicts wrestlers in ladder matches. Tomko comes in and kicks Kane in the face before helping Christian to the top in a bit of a call back to TLC II.

Kane is back up though and shoves the ladder over, sending Christian down to the floor and onto Tomko. Jericho and Kane knock each other off the ladder and everyone is down as we need a breather. With Kane down, Benoit (bleeding from the head) hits the Swan Dive off the ladder. Benoit goes up but has to headbutt Kane off but the arm is too banged up to get the briefcase. Edge blasts Benoit in the arm with a chair though and that’s enough to pull down the briefcase for the win.

Rating: A-. Yeah this was great with more time for drama and fewer instances of having the people laying around forever because there are too many people in the match at the same time. Edge winning is the best call as no one has been chasing the title like him and now he can steal the title down the line. It’s a heck of a fight though with a bunch of awesome spots and stuff that kept the fans interested without many dead spots. Great stuff and an awesome way to debut the concept.

Here’s the still injured Eugene, whose music doesn’t start until halfway down the aisle. This is his second favorite Wrestlemania moment every, after the midget army getting together to fight off King Kong Bundy at Wrestlemania III (Hillbilly Jim was included as well, and he spent a good hour talking about it during his Hall of Fame speech). Cue Daivari and Muhammad Hassan to complain about not being on the show (that they’re on) and rant about the prejudice in Los Angeles.

Hassan is ready to make his own Wrestlemania moment and jumps Eugene, setting up the camel clutch. Cue Hulk Hogan or the REAL AMERICAN save, including a double noggin knocker. Hassan gets sent outside so Daivari can hit Hogan with a chair. Since that doesn’t work, it’s a big boot and another toss to the floor so the posing can commence. Hogan even gets to do the big pose in front of the huge American flag on the stage. Yeah it’s old hat but I’ll always be a Hulkamaniac so this made me smile.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Undertaker. Orton won the World Title last fall but lost it in a hurry and has been on a slow downward spiral since. He needs to get back on track so he’s going after Undertaker and the Streak while turning heel in the process. Orton’s dad Bob is helping him a bit, because Orton has slid far enough that he needs that kind of help.

Randy Orton vs. Undertaker

The druids with the torches are here so you know it’s serious. Undertaker glides to the ring for a pretty cool entrance, which goes much faster than usual for a bonus. Orton comes out second for some reason, albeit with his own cool entrance of pyro raining down behind him as he poses with the still awesome Burn In My Light playing. After some early dodging, the first right hand gets Orton launched into the corner.

The dropkick out of the corner gets two and Orton backdrops him for a bump you don’t see from Undertaker that often. The early RKO attempt is shoved over the top as Undertaker is starting a bit slowly here. Old School connects but Orton is back up with a dropkick to the floor to take over. Undertaker’s running DDT gets two and Snake Eyes connects. The ensuing big boot is cut off with a running elbow though, sending the fans straight into a LET’S GO UNDERTAKER/RANDY SUCKS chant.

The slugout goes to Undertaker and we hit the dragon sleeper as Undertaker busts out some different stuff for a change. Orton breaks out and grabs a sleeper, which doesn’t please the crowd. The counter before Orton can take him to the ground is more appealing but Orton is back with a powerslam.

For some reason, Orton hammers away in the corner, meaning he has to escape the Last Ride. The referee gets bumped though and here’s Bob with a cast shot to Undertaker’s head for the close two. Undertaker boots Bob off the apron and grabs the chokeslam, which is reversed into the RKO in midair (one of my favorite counters ever) for two and a big sigh of relief from the fans. For reasons of general cockiness, Orton tries his own Tombstone, which is reversed into the real thing to make Undertaker 13-0.

Rating: B-. It’s a good match but it never came close to that higher level. It would take a little longer for Undertaker to get that much better at Wrestlemania so for now it’s just a good one. Orton was trying here and looked better than he has in a long time, though aside from that one RKO, he never felt like a real threat here. Still though, one hot near fall is better than none and it wasn’t bad by any stretch.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Christy Hemme. It’s the annual Playboy match as we’re now supposed to believe that Christy can wrestle and isn’t just there because of her looks. Lita has been training Christy and is more interesting than anything Christy has been doing. Keep in mind that Christy isn’t at fault here. She isn’t a wrestler and is being thrown into a match because she won a modeling contest. That’s on WWE, not Christy.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Christy Hemme

Trish is defending and Christy has Lita with her. The bell rings and Trish drops to the mat but kicks Christy away in a rather heelish move. They head outside with Trish sending her into the steps, followed by some chops in the corner back inside. The Chick Kick misses and Christy hits one of her own as the fans are just gone for this.

Christy does the splits on top to set up a sunset flip for two, only to have Trish spear her down. We get the BORING chants as Trish stops to yell at Lita, allowing Christy to start in with the kicks. The reverse Twist of Fate and a rollup give Christy two each but Trish has had it. That means the Chick Kick to retain the title and end Christy’s wrestling run.

Rating: D-. Yeah what else were you expecting? Trish was wrestling herself here as Christy was only good for some tumbling and that Twist of Fate. The women’s division is all but dead at this point and it’s likely going to be a long time before things get better. Christy was trying here but had no business in this spot.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels. Angle was annoyed that Shawn eliminated him from the Royal Rumble and beat him up, setting off the big feud. Kurt is annoyed that people were talking about Shawn in 1996 when Angle was an Olympic champion. Now Angle wants to prove that he is the better man on the biggest stage. Shawn is down with that because he’s Shawn Michaels and it’s Wrestlemania. This is more or less WWE saying “yeah it’s going to be a classic and everyone knows it.”

Various celebrities are here.

Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels

They stare at each other both before and after the bell until Shawn slaps him in the face. That makes Angle take him to the mat and Shawn is completely outclassed there. A headlock takeover works a bit better for Shawn as the fans are behind Angle for a bit of a surprise. The headlock stays on for a good while as they probably have a lot of time here. Shawn switches over to a short armscissors, allowing Angle to power out ala Bob Backlund (his old mentor).

Shawn is right back with the headlock but this time Angle powers up and takes him into the corner. The ankle lock is quickly broken up and it’s Shawn with a Cactus Clothesline to put them both on the floor. The announcers’ table is loaded up but Angle hits an Angle Slam into the post to take something out of Shawn. A suplex gives Angle two and it’s off to the bodyscissors to stay on the ribs/back.

The belly to belly gets two and it’s a reverse chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Angle’s belly to belly superplex is broken up but Shawn misses the top rope elbow. Shawn is fine enough to backdrop Angle to the floor and he’s crazy enough to hit a high crossbody to the floor with the knee possibly hitting Angle in the face. Angle gets back up and teases the German suplex off the apron to make the fans a little nervous.

A low blow gets Shawn out of trouble and that means the springboard spinning splash onto Angle onto the announcers’ table for less of a pop than you might have expected, mainly because the table doesn’t break. They head back in for the slugout into Shawn’s forearm and nipup so things can pick up again. Sweet Chin Music (way too early) is countered into the ankle lock, setting up the big crawl to the rope. Angle gets it again but this time Shawn reverses into a rollup for two.

Another Sweet Chin Music attempt is countered into the Angle Slam for two as frustration is setting in. In another awesome moment, Angle pulls his straps up so he can pull them right back down again because you know it’s serious. The moonsault misses though (probably spent too much time with the straps) so Shawn goes up, only to get caught in the super Angle Slam for two, meaning Angle looks ready to cry at the kickout.

Angle talks a bunch of trash so Shawn snaps off Sweet Chin Music to shut him up. That gets a very delayed two and they both need a breather. Angle picks the ankle into the ankle lock as he’s right back up but this time Shawn can’t kick away. Shawn fights everywhere but finally gets pulled down into the grapevine for the tap (after a nearly goofy amount of time).

Rating: A+. Yeah what else do you want here? They told an outstanding story with Shawn going with the natural talent but Angle just wanting it that much more and turning up the intensity to a level Shawn couldn’t reach. It made Shawn look like he couldn’t beat Angle on his best night, all while putting in an instant classic. These two went back and forth with one big spot after another and Angle took away a lot of Shawn’s strength by working on the back. Check this one out if you haven’t in a while as it’s worth seeing again.

Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young are here.

It’s time for Piper’s Pit (and I think there was an edit in there as the set was put together in the blink of an eye). Piper thanks the fans for the Hall of Fame but wants to get down to business. He wanted the meanest and baddest man in WWE so his guest is Steve Austin. Cue Austin (with a glass breaking transition as we cut to the stage), with JR saying that he’s back at Wrestlemania. He hasn’t missed one since 2000 so that’s not the biggest accomplishment. Piper asks if Austin is the rebel and slaps him in the face so Austin calls him an SOB and returns the slap. Piper: “I kind of like you.”

With that out of the way, Piper talks about respecting Austin but gets cut off by the WHAT chants, which he doesn’t seem to understand. Piper takes issue with one thing: he was ticking Vince McMahon off when Wrestlemania didn’t even have a number. Austin and James Dean have nothing on Piper when it comes to being a rebel. Austin runs down Piper’s appearance and they get in each other’s faces, allowing Piper to quote Cool Hand Luke about a failure of communication.

Cue Carlito, with Piper and Austin accusing each other of bringing him out. Piper: “I’ll get back to you.” Carlito accuses both of them of arguing like girls, before declaring them both non-cool. Piper: “Who the h*** are you? You look like Alfalfa.” Carlito wants the two of them out of here and loads up the apple but Piper takes it away.

It’s Carlito taking the spit this time so Carlito hits him in the face as Austin laughs. Bored of that, Austin beats Carlito up and Piper sends him outside. Beer is consumed until Austin Stuns Piper. This completely missed as Piper and Austin didn’t have anything to say to each other. Carlito getting to be out there was a nice few moments for him but this was all about the legends, who didn’t need to be there.

It’s immediately time for the sumo match with a much harder cut to Cole and Tazz. They had to edit something out of there and we get a VERY long crowd shot during the next entrance. That was probably to remove the ropes, but it still felt like something was cut.

Upon further review, they aired the You Talking To Me trailer here and announced it as winning the Best Overall Trailer award. They’ve aired that on Raw and Smackdown, so why cut it here?

Akebono vs. Big Show

They do the full traditional opening as the fans are really not interested in this one. We finally get going, they slap each other, pull at the gear a bit, Show lifts Akebono and spins him around, and then Akebono wins. This didn’t work again as it came and went as it just wasn’t the right thing for a show like Wrestlemania. Akebono never wrestled for WWE again and I don’t know if he ever appeared again so I’m not sure what the thinking was here.

We recap John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield for the Smackdown World Title. It’s built around a culture clash with JBL being the old, rich traditionalist while Cena lives by his own rules and cares about the people. Cena won a tournament to get the shot so JBL talked about how people like Cena didn’t deserve to be champion. He couldn’t get Cena to go too far though and Cena is ready to explode here.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL is defending and gets a police escort into the arena. Just to show off, we get a shower of JBL dollars, which are always a nice touch. They trade shoulders to start with JBL getting the better of it (the big boot out of the corner probably helped a bit). A suplex gives JBL two and he chokes Cena on the ropes for a bit. Back up and Cena is fine with getting into a slugout but JBL catches him with a Ron Simmons style spinebuster. A neckbreaker and some clotheslines stay on Cena’s neck, followed by a sleeper to do something similar enough.

Cena slips out and it’s a double clothesline to keep up the slow pace. JBL sends him outside for another neckbreaker before going up top for some reason. That earns him a slam out of the air but Cena can’t follow up. Cena starts his comeback but the fans aren’t quite thrilled. The Shuffle gets some energy flowing and after ducking the Clothesline From JBL, the FU gives Cena his first World Title out of nowhere.

Rating: D. Very bleh match here as there was no drama and the match just ended out of nowhere with Cena shrugging off the first ten minutes and winning with very little drama. I know the match itself doesn’t matter that much but Cena wasn’t ready to carry something like this and JBL was never capable of carrying something like this, leaving us with a very underwhelming match.

That’s also the end of JBL’s long title reign and really, it was a lot better than I remember. JBL can talk very well and while his matches weren’t great, it didn’t come close to dragging as a lot of people (myself included) remember. Maybe it was knowing when it was going to end but I didn’t mind this nearly as much as I expected to. JBL winning the title in the first place was a big stretch but he held it a lot better than I would have guessed.

Hall of Fame video. Hogan and Piper were long overdue. Heenan on Iron Sheik’s speech: “WHAT THE H*** DID HE SAY???”

Gene Okerlund brings out the year’s class:

Nikolai Volkoff (sure why not)

Iron Sheik (just don’t let him talk….or maybe let him talk….it could go either way)

Paul Orndorff (belongs in for 1986 alone and is smart enough to point at Miss Jackie)

Bob Orton (always good for a solid performance and still selling the injury from earlier)

Jimmy Hart (yep, and comes off as one of the nicest guys ever in wrestling)

Roddy Piper (would have headlined almost any other class)

Hulk Hogan (odds are we’re not here without him)

We recap the Raw World Title match. HHH has dominated the World Title scene for a long time and has used Evolution to help him hold onto the title. Batista has proven to be unstoppable and then won the Royal Rumble. HHH tried to talk him into going to Smackdown but Batista overheard the evil planning, sending Batista onto a path towards Wrestlemania and the title. This isn’t the hardest result to figure out and the fans are begging to see Batista take the title away from HHH for good.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Batista

HHH is defending and has Ric Flair with him, plus Motorhead plays him to the ring, just in case you thought Batista was cooler. I mean, you can barely understand the words because Lemmy butchers it in a great Brutus Beefcake impression but HHH rising up through the stage makes up for it a bit. Batista doesn’t get much of a pop, mainly due to the lack of the famous band performing his music.

The early power lockup lets them drive each other to the ropes but it’s only good for a standoff. They do it again with HHH’s running shoulder having no effect other than waking HHH up a bit. Another shoulder drops Batista but he’s right back up with something close to a powerslam. Batista hits a backdrop, only to have HHH knock him outside to cut the momentum off again.

Flair’s distraction lets HHH send Batista into the steps and Flair gets in some choking with the jacket. Back in and HHH gets two off a suplex, setting up more Flair choking. Whatever emotion the fans had for Batista after that HHH entrance is long gone now as HHH has beaten him down for about seven of the eight minutes the match has been going so far. Batista slugs away but walks into the spinebuster, because of course HHH needs to hit a spinebuster as he dominates Batista in the biggest match of Batista’s career.

A backdrop breaks up the Pedigree attempt but HHH is RIGHT BACK with the facebuster, leaving him on defense for all of three seconds. HHH goes up and gets clotheslined out of the air to no reaction as the fans are gone. They’re smart enough to realize that HHH is going to cut Batista off again and, as expected, Batista charges into a big boot in the corner just a few seconds later. Batista sends HHH over the corner, only to have HHH whip him into the steps.

The Pedigree onto the steps is countered into a catapult into the post and we’ve got some blood. Back in and it’s time to hammer on the cut as the fans finally have something to cheer about. The big running clothesline in the corner rocks HHH and a powerslam gets two as there isn’t quite the energy in the offense that you would expect. It feels like they’re just doing stuff to fill time until the ending instead of of building something up.

Batista sends him outside but goes after Flair, allowing HHH to grab the chair, which hits the referee by mistake. Flair’s belt shot is countered with a spinebuster but HHH’s belt shot gets two. The fans react to the kickout and Batista hits the spinebuster for the big reaction. That’s too much cheering for HHH’s liking so he hits Batista low. Batista blocks the Pedigree with raw power though and hits something like White Noise. The Batista Bomb finally makes Batista champion.

Rating: C. It was miles better than Cena vs. JBL but egads this didn’t do Batista any favors. This was more about giving HHH a big sendoff as champion than making Batista look like a star and….I can’t say I’m surprised. Batista has looked so dominant and smart for the last six weeks that HHH probably couldn’t help himself from cutting him off. HHH did put him over, but it could have been a lot stronger without HHH beating him up and outsmarting him for the first half of the match. Much like the previous match though, it’s all about what comes next rather than what happened here, but HHH made sure to make himself look good.

The big celebration and highlight package wrap things up.

Overall Rating: B. Much like last year, this really needed forty five minutes to an hour trimmed off (and again it’s easy to see what should be gone) to make it great. As it is it’s quite good but there are a lot of times where it felt like it was dragging. The two World Title matches were outclassed by Money in the Bank and Shawn vs. Angle (not exactly shocking on either front) but they got the endings right and aside from the sumo match and Piper’s Pit (which wasn’t that long), only the very short women’s match is bad (and that has various other positives).

What we got here was a strong Wrestlemania, but it needed some time trimmed off to really make it great. That being said, this is still far better than the five hour monstrosities we get now. It’s a completely watchable, at times great and very important show though, meaning it feels like Wrestlemania. The streak of good Wrestlemanias continues, though the show getting longer isn’t the most encouraging sign. Check out the ladder match and Shawn vs. Angle if you have the time though as they’re worth a second look (or nineteenth look in some cases).

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Great American Bash 2008 (2024 Edition): See You Next Show

Great American Bash 2008
Date: July 20, 2008
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 12,454
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We’re wrapping up the period before the Summerslam build here and the card is one sided to put it mildly. The Smackdown side is pretty much Edge challenging HHH for the Smackdown World Title, plus a four way Tag Team Title match. On the other side, Raw has John Cena vs. JBL in a parking lot fight, CM Punk defending the Raw World Title against Batista and Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho in a grudge match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Vickie Guerrero and Edge’s wedding, plus HHH revealing that Edge cheated on her the night before to end Smackdown. The other big matches get some attention of their own.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Edgeheads vs. Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Jesse and Festus

Miz and Morrison are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Festus clears the ring as tends to be his custom before Hornswoggle comes in for a stare…uh, up. Hornswoggle rolls up his sleeves but opts to dive onto Miz and Morrison instead. We settle down to Jesse monkey flipping Miz and knocking him down again for two. Festus beats on Miz as well before handing it off to Finlay. Morrison comes in and actually takes over on Finlay before bringing Miz back in for a chinlock.

It’s back to Morrison for his own chinlock as JR continues his Morrison to Rick Rude comparisons. Finlay fights up and double legs Miz down before doing the same thing to beat on Morrison. They collide in the corner so Ryder tags himself in to hammer Finlay down. The neck crank doesn’t last long on Finlay so Hawkins comes in to keep Finlay in trouble.

The Celtic Cross hits Hawkins and a shillelagh shot gets two, with Miz and Morrison making the save. Hawkins grabs a chinlock but Finlay is back up again, this time getting over to Hornswoggle to pick up the pace. Jesse tags himself in just as fast though and the fans are not pleased with the lack of Hornswoggle. Hawkins comes back in for a cheap shot on Hornswoggle but it’s back to Festus to really clean house. Miz and Morrison are sent outside and Hawkins breaks up the Rocket Launcher to pin Jesse and win the titles.

Rating: C+. It was a fast paced opener with a bunch of moving parts but they managed to keep the focus on just a few people at a time until the ending. Hawkins and Ryder winning the titles is the right way to go as Miz and Morrison have gotten everything they can out of them and La Familia is still the biggest thing on Smackdown. Give the team some more gold, as it’s not like Jesse and Festus or Hornswoggle/Finlay are worth anything.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and is quickly taken to the mat to start. A small package gives Hardy two as well as a breather but Benjamin is right back with a headlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as they’re certainly starting slowly. Benjamin sends him to the apron for a ram into the post, setting up the armbar back inside. A gutbuster sets up the seated abdominal stretch as commentary talks about Benjamin’s aggression, despite there being nothing to suggest it exists here.

Hardy fights up and tries a Side Effect but gets planted with something like an STO. Back up and Hardy blocks Paydirt to start the comeback and hits the bulldog out of the corner. Hardy’s middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a heck of a buckle bomb and they’re both down. A Side Effect gives Hardy two but the moonsault…I think it was supposed to hit knees but Hardy overshot it anyway. Paydirt gives Benjamin the pin and the title.

Rating: C. The match was far from bad, but it wasn’t exactly thrilling, as it came off as more of a house show match. The ending didn’t help things either as commentary had to scramble to cover Hardy missing. It’s not like hardy was doing anything with the title anyway so switching it over to Benjamin works as well as anything else.

We see an interview from Monday, with CM Punk talking about how he’s always been the underdog. It’s not about your size or muscle and he’s in the business of proving everyone wrong, which is what he’s always done.

We look at HHH revealing that Edge cheated on Vickie Guerrero the day before their wedding.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Henry is defending and has Tony Atlas in his corner while Dreamer has Colin Delaney. Dreamer charges at him and is quickly shoved into the corner, with Henry throwing him around again for a bonus. A hard clothesline puts Dreamer down again and Henry steps on his head as a few BORING chants start up.

Henry works on the arm (which is code for he leans over and grabs the wrist), Dreamer fights up, Henry takes him down and works on the arm again. The splash misses though and Dreamer hits the basement dropkick but has to escape the World’s Strongest Slam. The DDT puts Henry down and Dreamer goes up for no apparent reason, allowing Delaney to pull him down. Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam to retain.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of everything that is wrong with ECW. First of all, there was no reason to believe Dreamer was going to take the title. He hasn’t been nearly that important for a long time now and it wasn’t going to change here. Second, the Delaney turn doesn’t mean much as he’s a loser who didn’t exactly become a star when he was with Dreamer. Third, the match was really boring, which is quite ECW in a lot of ways. Rather dull stuff here and by far the worst thing on the show.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels, and thank goodness as the show needs it. Jericho claimed Michaels is a hypocrite (and was kind of right) and then took out his eye. Now Michaels is back for revenge and to prove that no matter what Jericho does, Michaels will always be better.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

They lock up to start and thankfully drop that in all of two seconds to start hitting each other in the face. Shawn gets the better of things with some chops and knocks Jericho into the corner before going after the leg. The reverse Figure Four has Jericho in early trouble but he’s in the ropes pretty quickly. Shawn stays on the leg and the referee stops things for a second to check on Jericho in the corner.

Jericho is fine enough to send Shawn over the corner and out to the apron, with Shawn favoring his back. The knee is fine enough to hit a triangle dropkick out to the floor before Jericho takes him inside for a double arm crank. With that broken up, Jericho dives into an atomic drop and Shawn drops him with the flying forearm. Shawn nips up but Jericho pulls him straight into the Walls, which is counter you don’t see very often.

This time Shawn makes the rope so Jericho loads up the bulldog, only to get dropped with a clothesline for two. The top rope elbow is broken up but Shawn wins a fight on top and now the elbow connects. Cue Lance Cade to break up the superkick but Shawn blocks the Codebreaker. They slug it out again until Shawn hiptosses him out onto Cade for the big crash. Naturally Shawn is right there with a moonsault onto the two of them and everyone is down again.

Back in and Shawn’s bad eye is busted open, with commentary not being sure when it was cut. Naturally Jericho goes right after the eye and knocks him into the ropes, where Cade gets in the cheap shot. The very bloody Shawn manages to pull him into a crossface but Jericho pulls him into the buckle for the violent escape. The referee wants to stop it but Shawn begs him not to, meaning Jericho is right back on the eye. Shawn is COVERED in blood and does the “pull myself up on the other guy’s tights” spot, only to have Jericho punch him down again and hammer away….until the referee finally stops it.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but there is almost no one better than Shawn at making you think he was dying in front of your eyes. Shawn was trying to fight and was still in there until the injury flared up again, along with Cade offering the distraction. This felt like the big middle piece in a bigger story and they pulled me in with the emotion and hatred. Awesome match and we’re almost certainly not done yet.

We get the emotional exit for Shawn, who has to be helped out.

Edge is really not pleased with HHH for violating his privacy and taking away his personal life. All Edge has left is his professional life and tonight, he will be extra dangerous.

Divas Title: Michelle McCool vs. Natalya

For the inaugural title but commentary is to busy talking about Edge/Vickie Guerrero. They grapple to the mat to start as commentary compares McCool to softball star Jennie Finch. Natalya wheelbarrow drops her throat first over the top to take over and we hit the surfboard to stay on McCool’s….well various parts. McCool powers out so Natalya switches to the Sharpshooter. That’s broken up as well and this time McCool pulls her into the heel hook for the title.

Rating: C-. These two were in the death slot as there was almost no way they were going to be able to follow the previous match. It doesn’t help that the match was almost a Natalya squash until McCool got in her one hold for the win. It’s rather nice for the women on Smackdown to have something to do, but they could use some more blood in the division or it is going to turn old fast.

Post match here is Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying you need to save your ticket stubs because this is the night of Shawn Michaels’ last match. Shawn has a detached retina and that means his career is over. It shows that the good guys win and the wicked are punished and the worst has finally come for Shawn. Jericho was feeling the evil here and it worked.

We recap CM Punk defending the World Title against Batista. Punk won Money In The Bank and used it to become champion, meaning he needs to prove himself worthy. Batista doesn’t seem to be overly intimidated so Punk is extra motivated.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and we go old school with a weapons check. Batista powers him around to start and Punk realizes he might need another plan. Some kicks to the legs slow Batista down but he elbows Punk in the face to cut him off. An enziguri knocks Batista outside and Punk follows him outside with a suicide dive.

Back in and Punk strikes away, only to be run over to give Batista two. The camel clutch goes on to keep Punk in trouble, which is broken up as camel clutches tend to be. Punk gets up a shot to the face in the corner and hits a high crossbody for two. The Batista Bomb is countered but a powerslam isn’t, meaning Punk has to counter the Bomb again.

Punk hits the running knee in the corner but can’t hit the GTS, instead settling for the springboard clothesline. The Anaconda Vice (been a minute since Punk used that) is broken up and Batista hits a heck of a clothesline. Batista’s charge hits the post and he falls outside, where he is able to catch a diving Punk with a spinebuster. Cue Kane to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They were starting to get somewhere but then just stopped for the DQ ending. This is either setting up a triple threat (erg) or Punk vs. Batista II, but Punk needs to win something on a big stage. It was bad enough that he got the title via Money In The Bank, but he’s lucky to crack the top five stars on Raw. This didn’t help things, though I guess Batista needed to be kept strong. Granted that makes me wonder why he was in the match in the first place, but I can picture Vince’s “oh it’s fine” face from here so we’ll move o.

Post match Kane lays out Punk, Batista, and a production worker. With Kane gone, Batista hits the Batista Bomb on Punk to make things even worse for the champ. Somehow this is a double DQ, despite Kane not touching Punk before the bell.

We recap John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield. With Vince McMahon gone, JBL has declared martial law but Cena isn’t having it. Now they’re going to fight in a parking lot.

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

This is taking place in the parking lot in a circle of cars and JBL shows up in his limo, fighting in most of a suit. There’s no Cena to start so JBL gets on a hood, only to have Cena pop up in another car and ram into him. Cena chokes him with a cord and then slams a car hood onto JBL’s back. Some jumper cables to the crotch set up some electrocution and JBL screams a lot.

JBL is put on another hood and Cena throws a well placed keg, only to hit windshield. With JBL trying to drive away, Cena grabs him for some rams into the horn. JBL fights back to little avail but manages to whip Cena through a car door, knocking it off the hinges. Cena gets punched off a car for two and then sent through the windshield of another for the big crash.

A crowbar shot misses for JBL and Cena slugs away but JBL sends him through a window. With nothing else working, JBL goes to grab some gasoline (with his limo rolling away) and douses one of the cars (with Cena inside). The car is lit on fire and promptly extinguished, with an annoyed looking Cena getting out. JBL goes over to a forklift but Cena is there to send him into another car.

Now Cena gets in the forklift and gores said car, only to lift it up and carry it into the arena. Commentary kicks in as Cena knocks JBL around and plants him with the ProtoBomb onto the stage. Cena loads up the FU but walks JBL over to the edge of the stage, only to take too long as JBL slips off. JBL sends him off the stage and through a windshield for the upset win.

Rating: C-. This was quite the situation and I wasn’t wild on most of it. They had a bunch of slow brawling in the back with car stuff before coming to the arena for a few minutes. JBL had to get a win of some sort but egads this means we’re going to have to hear him talk even more, which is about as painful of a thought as I can imagine. Not exactly great here, but what are you expecting from JBL?

We recap Edge vs. HHH for the latter’s Smackdown World Title. Vickie Guerrero gave Edge the title shot before their wedding but then Edge cheated on her the day before said wedding, with HHH revealing Edge’s, uh, indiscretion. Now it’s about the title, though Edge is more than a bit distracted.

HHH has no regrets over what he did.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Edge

HHH is defending and we get the Big Match Intros with a weapons check. Edge charges right at him and hammers away but gets sent outside. HHH sends him outside and grabs a neck snap across the top. A ram int the buckle has Edge on the floor again but he knocks a diving HHH out of the air. Back in and Edge hits the running shoulder in the corner before sending him outside for a whip into the steps.

A drop onto the announcers’ table keeps HHH’s ribs in trouble and Edge grabs a bodyscissors back inside. HHH fights up but gets dropkicked to the apron, where he sidesteps a spear to send Edge crashing to the floor. Back in and HHH slugs away before they go outside (again) with Edge going into the post. Edge is right back up though and grabs the Impaler on the floor, which means a rather delayed cover gets two.

HHH hits his own DDT for his own two but the Pedigree is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. The spear only hits buckle but Edge’s big boot only hits HHH’s jaw, leaving them both down again. Back up and the spear is countered into the spinebuster to give HHH a much needed breather. The Pedigree is countered again, this time with a ram into the corner. Edge takes him up top for a superplex but here is wedding planner Alicia Fox to send in the title. Cue Vickie Guerrero to take Alicia down and the catfight is on in the ring. The spear hits Vickie by mistake, allowing HHH to grab the Pedigree for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. It was good but they never came close to hitting that really high level. At the same time, it didn’t help that this was more about the Vickie/Edge stuff, with the title just kind of being there on the side. These two feel like they should have had their first big match on a more important show, but at least what they got to do here did work. It just could have been a pretty good bit better.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a perfectly fine show that should have been better than it was. There were some big matches on the card and those matches worked, but the lower card stuff is completely forgettable, even with three new champions being crowned. It’s a show where things happened, but it’s not a show that felt important. Instead, it came off like a “the big one is next time”, which doesn’t make for the most enjoyable event.

 

 

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Royal Rumble Count-Up: 2013 Redo – 2009: HHH and Orton. Again.

Royal Rumble 2009
Date: January 25, 2009
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 16,685
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Tazz

ECW Title: Jack Swagger vs. Matt Hardy

Hardy walks into a belly to belly suplex from Jack for two though and both guys are down. A DDT on the arm gets two for the champion but Matt blocks a belly to back superplex. Matt hits a decent looking moonsault for two and the fans are getting into these kickouts. The Twist is countered and Jack sends Matt shoulder and possibly head first into the post. The Swagger Bomb retains the title.

Rating: B-. Better match than I was expecting here with both guys looking good out there. Matt was getting close to being something decent as a singles guy and this was his way off ECW and onto Smackdown. Swagger would go on to win a world title and shock the world in the process before falling through the floor soon after. Solid opener here.

Orton arrives and gets glared at.

Melina is challenging and Beth has Santino with her here. Beth shoves her around to start before easily breaking out of a headlock. A LOUD Santino chant starts up as Beth throws Melina around. Melina comes back with a shot to the head but gets shoved down immediately again. The challenger hooks an armbar of all things but Beth easily stands up while Melina stands on her shoulder.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Jeff Hardy

We head back inside again with Edge in full control including a spear in the corner. Jeff grabs a quick two off a sunset flip but gets clotheslined right back down. Off to a body vice by Edge to slow things down a bit. Jeff fights up and hits a mule kick before going up top, only to jump into a dropkick from Edge for two. Now Edge goes to get two chairs but Jeff spears him down off the apron before it can be brought in.

Rumble by the numbers which is roughly the same as the previous year.

Royal Rumble

Punk pulls Regal out and brags about it without getting thrown out. R-Truth is #24 and nothing happens. Rob Van Dam makes a one night only return at #25 after not having been seen in the WWE in about a year and a half. That at least wakes the crowd up but there are too many people in there for his style of stuff to work. He loads up the Five Star but Truth is too close so he has to bail out in mid air.

Jericho tries to put a sleeper on Show but it gets about as far as you would expect. Taker throws Punk to the apron as Show dumps Truth. Punk fires off some kicks and hangs on three times so Show finally knocks him out cold and out to the floor. Show knocks out Knox and Mysterio as Horny gets in for no apparent reason. Finlay tries to save him and gets dumped for his efforts at good parenting.

Ratings Comparison

Jack Swagger vs. Matt Hardy

Original: B

Redo: B-

Melina vs. Beth Phoenix

Original: C-

Redo: D+

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: C

Redo: C-

Edge vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: B-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: C-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/28/royal-rumble-count-up-2009-the-voices-tell-me-no-one-but-orton-has-a-chance/

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Royal Rumble 2008 (2022 Redo): SURPRISE!

Royal Rumble 2008
Date: January 27, 2008
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City New York
Attendance: 20,798
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

I believe this is my fifth time reviewing this show but I’m always curious to see how much different it feels having recently watched the TV leading up to it. The show has been set for a long time now and that means we need to get on with the pay per view already. Of course there is the Royal Rumble, but the Raw World Title match between Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton is the real draw here. This show is summed up in three words: Hardy Could Win. It worked in 2008 and it’s working again here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Royal Rumble, with this year’s being extra special because it’s in Madison Square Garden. Works for me.

Ric Flair vs. MVP

Flair’s career is on the line but MVP’s US Title isn’t. Before the match, Flair talks about how he has wrestled here throughout his career, starting all the way back in 1976. Flair thanks the fans for the respect they have given him throughout the years….and then MVP’s music cuts him off. Feeling out process to start with Flair being driven back into the corner, meaning he needs to stop and think for a second.

A hammerlock sends MVP into the ropes so Flair chops him down. Back up and MVP kicks Flair in the head to take over, setting up a neckbreaker for two. Something like a crossface chickenwing keeps Flair down but MVP is no Bob Backlund, meaning Flair is right back up. Flair goes for the knee but gets knocked into the corner, allowing MVP to strike him down. The running boot in the corner gives MVP three, albeit with Flair’s foot on the ropes.

The distraction lets Flair roll him up for two so MVP grabs a butterfly suplex for two of his own. A superplex gets two more and the frustration is really setting in. Back up and they collide for a double knockdown, making me wonder if a draw would end Flair’s career. Flair rolls him up a few times for two each before chopping away. That earns Flair a facebuster but the Playmaker is countered into a Figure Four to give Flair the win.

Rating: C. This wasn’t so much about the drama, as Flair wasn’t going to lose to MVP, even at a show like the Rumble. Instead, this was all about Flair getting in Madison Square Garden one more time and the match was built up over a few weeks. I’m not wild on the US Champion giving up clean, but there are bigger things afoot here.

Vince McMahon gives Hornswoggle a pep talk for the Royal Rumble, Finlay comes in and Vince suggests that Hornswoggle might turn on him.

And now, we meet Mike Adamle, who talks about Ric Flair’s match and throws it to a package on Chris Jericho vs. JBL.

We recap Jericho vs. JBL, which is focused on JBL not liking Jericho’s comeback and costing him the WWE Title. Then JBL took him out, setting up this showdown.

Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Jericho drives him into the corner to start so JBL begs off a bit. That doesn’t work for Jericho, who takes him down and hammers away again. A missed clothesline lets Jericho grab the Walls, which sends JBL bailing to the rope. Jericho knocks him outside for a baseball slide and then sends him into the steps for a bonus. Back in and JBL drops the bad throat across the top to take over.

As you might guess, JBL starts hammering Jericho down in the corner, albeit not as fast as he did in the past. The logical sleeper goes on for a bit, until Jericho fights up and hits his own hard clothesline. Back up and JBL sends him HARD into the post, with Jericho coming up busted open. Jericho pops back to his feet and sends JBL outside despite being COVERED in blood. One heck of a chair shot to the head knocks JBL silly but also hands Jericho the DQ.

Rating: C+. It was a bit of a slow match but they did a great job of setting up the violent ending. They were trying to keep the feud going here and Jericho being that busted open was a good way to accomplish just that. It was a violent fight and Jericho’s chair shot made it even better. Not too bad here, albeit with the usual Jericho pacing issues.

Post match Jericho unloads on JBL and chokes him with the camera cable as JBL did to him a few weeks ago.

Ashley Massaro tries to talk to Maria but Santino Marella cuts her off, saying Maria isn’t interested in Playboy. Right.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Edge won the title thanks to some assistance from Vickie Guerrero, his new girlfriend. Rey won a Beat The Clock Challenge by pinning Edge to earn the shot here, with the Rey/Guerrero family details making things even more complicated.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge, with Vickie Guerrero and the Edgeheads, is defending. They take their time to start with Edge grabbing a wristlock. Rey kicks his way out as the fans are WAY behind Edge, with Cole writing it off as a New York thing. Edge sends him to the apron and hits a baseball slide to the floor, where the Edgeheads get THIS CLOSE to interfering. That’s enough for an ejection, allowing Rey to come back with a springboard seated senton for two.

Rey tries to pick up the pace even further but gets knocked off the top for a crash. The half crab goes on to keep Rey in trouble before Edge shifts it to something like an ankle lock. Rey’s leg is good enough to come back with an enziguri but the 619 is cut off. Back up and Rey manages to hit the sitout bulldog, setting up a kick to the head with the good leg for two.

Edge is staggered enough that Rey can knock him to the floor, setting up a sliding tornado DDT. Back in and Edge boots him down but Rey hits a quick 619. The top rope splash connects but Vickie gets out of the wheelchair to break up the pin. Rey doesn’t get distracted and sets up another 619, which only hits the interfering Vickie. That’s enough of a shock for Edge to spear Rey out of the air to retain.

Rating: B-. Another good one here, even if there was no chance of a title change here. Rey was little more than the designated victim for Edge as tends to be the case for the Royal Rumble. They had a pay per view worthy match though and Edge gets to move on to someone bigger with Wrestlemania on the way. Nice stuff here, given the circumstances.

Everyone checks on Vickie, who has to be put back in the wheelchair.

Mr. Kennedy comes in to see Ric Flair (in a towel) and condescendingly praise him for his win. Kennedy promises to win the Rumble and suggests he could retire Flair before Wrestlemania. Shawn Michaels comes in to suggest that Kennedy leave and then accidentally compares Flair to Kennedy. Flair knows Shawn is winning the Rumble tonight….and here’s Batista for an awkward staredown. And HHH too, just to make it weirder. HHH tells Ric to put his pants on and Shawn plugs his new shirt.

Here is Maria for the Kiss Cam. With that out of the way, Ashley Massaro comes out to offer Maria the Playboy spot but here is Santino Marella to say no for her. Oh and New York sports teams are awful. Maria thinks posing is a good idea so Santino has a present for her: Big Dick Johnson in New England Patriots (playing the New York Giants in the Super Bowl) gear. The women beat Johnson up to finish this one big announcement off.

Mike Adamle throws us to a package on Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy.

We recap Jeff Hardy challenging Randy Orton for the WWE Title. Hardy is on the roll of a lifetime and is ready to challenge for the title. This was one of the best builds WWE has done in a LONG time as it feels like Hardy could actually pull off the huge upset. This gets the big music video treatment and it still works very well.

Raw World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending and Hardy’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. They fight over a lockup to start until Jeff shoves him away to a rather strong reaction. Hardy grabs a headlock on the mat, which is reversed with a headscissors. That doesn’t bother Hardy, who is right back with the legdrop between the legs for two. Orton gets clotheslined to the floor and there’s the dropkick through the ropes to send him hard into the barricade.

They fight on the floor for a bit with Orton grabbing a belly to back suplex for two back inside. The circle stomp keeps Hardy in trouble and the choking has JR and King getting rather annoyed. Hardy fights up again and sends Orton over the top for a change, setting up the big dive off the apron. Back in and Jeff gets sent shoulder first into the post to put him right back down, meaning Orton can grab the chinlock.

Hardy fights up after a good while and hits the Whisper In The Wind for a rather near fall. The Swanton is loaded up but Orton rolls outside before it can launch. That’s fine with Hardy, who dropkicks Orton off the apron and hits a moonsault off the top to make it even worse. Back in and the Twist of Fate is loaded up but Orton counters into the RKO to retain the title.

Rating: B-. It didn’t have the hue moment of Hardy winning the title but it wound up being a pretty solid match with Hardy coming up just short. The problem is that they didn’t have any major spot from Hardy but you could tell that he would be back. Hardy will have to get there somewhere, though he had to come up short here, despite an amazing buildup.

Rumble By The Numbers time!

569 wrestlers eliminated
36 wrestlers eliminated by Steve Austin
11 appearances by Shawn Michaels
11 wrestlers eliminated by Kane in 2001
3 Mick Foley personae to appear in the same Royal Rumble
2 feet that have to touch the ground
1 woman to enter the match, with Chyna
62:12 that Rey Mysterio lasted in 2006
2 seconds that Warlord lasted in 1990
3 Steve Austin wins
2 wins for the #1 spot, compared to 1 win for #30
#27 produces the most winners
73% of winners have gone on to win the title at Wrestlemania since 1993

Michael Buffer handles the Royal Rumble intro in a nice bonus.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals. Undertaker is in at #1 and Shawn Michaels is in at #2 so they’re starting very fast here. Undertaker wastes no time in slugging away and even knocks Shawn onto the top. A running big boot only hits corner though and Undertaker winds up on the apron. That’s fine for him as he catches a charging Shawn by the throat and drops him with a big boot. Santino Marella is in at #3 and lasts as long as you would expect. With Santino gone, Shawn tries to toss Undertaker but gets punched in the face again. Old School is broken up without much trouble and Great Khali is in at #4.

The fans start up the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants as Undertaker strikes away at Khali and actually choke shoves him out. Hardcore Holly is in at #5 and actually hangs on for a bit by slugging it out with Undertaker. That earns him a big boot to the face but Shawn goes to eliminate Undertaker, allowing Holly to fire off some chops in the corner. John Morrison is in at #6 and it’s time for people to start pairing off. With nothing going on, Tommy Dreamer is in at #7 because we needed some ECW chants.

Dreamer does about what you would expect from him until Batista is in at #8 to keep the star power up. Dreamer breaks up the Undertaker vs. Batista showdown and is promptly eliminated (serves him right). Batista spears Morrison down as commentary thinks teaming up on Undertaker/Batista/Shawn makes sense. Hornswoggle is in at #9 and goes straight underneath the ring in a smart move. Batista hits another spear on Undertaker and Holly backdrops Shawn.

Chuck Palumbo is in at #10, giving us Undertaker, Shawn, Holly, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (under the ring) and Palumbo. Morrison saves himself from elimination as the six in the ring pair off a bit. The banged up Jamie Noble is in at #11 and lasts all of thirty seconds before getting tossed by Palumbo. CM Punk is in at #12 and gets his face blasted off by Shawn’s clothesline. Cody Rhodes is in at #13 and manages to dropkick Undertaker down as Punk knocks Palumbo out. Umaga is in at #14 and Spikes Holly out to keep the numbers even.

Snitsky is in at #15 and stomps on Cody in the corner until Miz is in at #16. Undertaker goes after Umaga (weird pairing) but can’t get him out. Shelton Benjamin is in at #17 and snaps Miz and Morrison’s throats on the top. Paydirt hits Punk but Shawn superkicks Shelton out in less than twenty seconds. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 for the big nostalgia pop in the Garden. Punk goes straight for him because he wants to get knocked down by Snuka.

Speaking of Snuka, he got a big pop at #18, but Roddy Piper is in at #19 for a bigger one. Everything stops cold for the Piper vs. Snuka showdown and yeah ok this is awesome. Kane is in at #20 and tosses Piper and Snuka without much trouble. That leaves us with Undertaker, Michaels, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (still underneath the ring), Punk, Rhodes, Umaga, Snitsky, Miz and Kane. Umaga breaks up a chokeslam to Shawn and it’s Carlito in at #21.

Punk and Morrison almost toss Carlito out but he springboards back and catches Punk with a Backstabber. Mick Foley is in at #22 to start cleaning house but Umaga runs a lot of people over as well. Mr. Kennedy is in at #23 and hits some Mic Checks before kicking down a sitting up Undertaker. That’s not cool with Undertaker who gives him a chokeslam and gets his own chance to clean house.

Big Daddy V is in at #24 and Undertaker knocks Snitsky out, only to get superkicked out by Shawn. Kennedy tosses Shawn immediately thereafter and the ring is suddenly a lot more empty. Shawn lands at Undertaker’s feet but Undertaker beats up Snitsky to let off steam instead. Kennedy and Rhodes fight to the apron but it’s Mark Henry in at #25. Henry and V start getting all dominant as Hornswoggle pops out to pull Miz to the floor for an elimination.

Chavo Guerrero is in at #26 and Punk is right on him as Kane boots Morrison out. Hornswoggle pops out again and gets grabbed by Henry and V. Cue Finlay with the shillelagh (I guess in at #27) for the save and he leaves with Hornswoggle, which apparently counts as a double elimination. Elijah Burke is in at #28 as JR says Finlay was officially disqualified for the shillelagh. Batista is knocked outside (not eliminated) and Chavo dumps out Punk to keep their feud going.

HHH is in at #29 and this should clear some people out. There goes Rhodes and V follows him, setting up the HHH vs. Foley slugout. HHH sends Foley into Burke for the double elimination and Umaga misses a charge into the post. There’s the Pedigree to Umaga…..and none of that matters as JOHN CENA returns at #30 to an all time shocked reaction.

It wasn’t clear if Cena was going to be back by Wrestlemania but since Cena doesn’t seem to be a human, he’s already back after two months instead of about six. That gives us a final grouping of Batista, Umaga, Kane, Carlito, Kennedy, Henry, Guerrero, HHH and Cena. After being shocked, the fans remember to boo Cena as he fires out Carlito, Henry and Chavo.

We get the big Cena vs. HHH showdown with HHH hitting the spinebuster but getting dropped by Umaga. Batista spears Umaga down and tosses Kennedy, followed by a running clothesline to get rid of Umaga. We’re down to Kane, Batista, HHH and Cena, with HHH and Batista quickly tossing Kane. They stare at each other for a long time before the fight is on. Batista clotheslines them both down and spinebusters HHH but Cena backdrops his way out of a Batista Bomb.

That’s enough for the elimination and we’re down to HHH vs. Cena. That means some sign pointing before the BOO/YAY slugout begins. Cena hits the ProtoBomb and the Shuffle but the AA is blocked. The double clothesline leaves them both down for a needed breather for both them and the fans. Back up and another AA attempt is countered and HHH hits a DDT to take over. HHH can’t throw him out and can’t Pedigree him either, as Cena reverses into an AA for the win.

Rating: B. This match had a lot of the things that a great Rumble needs, ranging from surprises (especially the big one at the end) to star power throughout to a few fun moments like Foley, Piper and Snuka. The Cena return is what people remember about this match though and that is all it needed to be, as that was a genuine shock for a great moment. Quite good Rumble, with the Cena part being the big icing on the cake.

Cena celebrates a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is the biggest one match show of the year and as it goes, so goes the rest of the show. The other four matches on here were good enough but there was nothing worth going out of your way to see. Cena being back breathes a lot of life into the show but it was still a good one even coming to that point. Not an all time classic, but there are far worse ways to spend two hours and forth five minutes.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2005 (2019 Redo): Oops I Tore My Quad

Royal Rumble 2005
Date: January 30, 2005
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz

We’re finally to one of the more important shows ever and the main event is a two horse race. This is clearly the year of John Cena or Batista and either one is a great option to win. They’re owning their shows right now and both of them seem to be locks to walk out of Wrestlemania with the World Titles. Predictable does not mean bad though and that seems to be the case here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at great Rumble endings as a clock counts down. After it reaches zero, we see….well more of the same actually but there are so many historic Rumble moments that it works just fine.

Edge vs. Shawn Michaels

Nothing wrong with a grudge match. Edge blames Shawn for him not winning the World Title and has taken out some aggression on him. They get started fast with Shawn clotheslining him to the floor and skinning the cat so the vest can come off. Back in and the announcers argue over whether or not Shawn is a champion hog. Edge gets in a swinging neckbreaker and the fans are all over him early on.

A Thesz press and right hands let Shawn throw him over the top for a nice mini moment. Shawn’s baseball slide misses though and it’s the Edge-O-Matic on the floor to knock him silly. Back in again and the fans stay behind Shawn as they’re certainly loyal. Edge gets two off a sitout powerbomb so it’s off to a rear naked choke. Well a chinlock with a bodyscissors because it’s Edge but close enough.

It’s switched to a regular chinlock and a slam, allowing Edge to strike Shawn’s pose. Shawn is annoyed but walking into a big boot makes it even worse. A clothesline takes Shawn down again as he can’t get anything going here. Another chinlock is broken up in a hurry and Shawn scores with a knee lift and some atomic drops. Ten right hands in the corner set up the catapult for two but Shawn has to stop Edge from walking out. It’s either a ruse or bad timing though as Edge gets in the spear on the floor.

Shawn beats the count back in and Edge….dances? That’s certainly a new one. What isn’t a new one is the spear (complete with tuning up the band, though JR insists that Edge has no band), which only gets two. A superplex is broken up though and Shawn drops the big elbow. Sweet Chin Music is countered into an electric chair drop (nice counter) and the Edgecator goes on. Shawn makes the long and slow crawl to the rope (Lawler: “He was going to tap and the rope happened to be there!”) but Edge grabs a rollup and a rope for the cheating pin.

Rating: B. It’s a nice mixture of action and storytelling here as the match was good and edge cheated to win, which is what makes perfect sense for him. Edge hit everything he had on Shawn to try and win clean and then went with the cheating to put him away. That’s exactly what Edge would do because he’s so obsessed with getting a win so well done on the opener.

Eric Bischoff and Theodore Long argue over which brand will win the Rumble. With that out of the way, we get Torrie Wilson and Christy Hemme to stand there while wrestlers come in to draw their numbers. Ric Flair and Eddie Guerrero come in first with Flair dancing and having the girls blow on his ball (make your own jokes). Flair is thrilled with his number so Eddie hugs him without drawing his own number. For the sake of convenience, Flair checks his number again and finds a bad one. The chase is on.

Heidenreich is freaking out over caskets when Gene Snitsky comes in. They like each other and Snitsky has an idea. The tone of voices sound like…..never mind.

We recap Heidenreich vs. Undertaker. Heidenreich is the latest monster and Undertaker has beaten him a few times but since WWE can’t just let him go, we get a casket match. As luck would have it, Heidenreich is terrified of caskets so he’s been running around in panic for weeks now. What a great way to present a monster.

Heidenreich vs. Undertaker

Casket match of course with druids bringing the casket out. Undertaker grabs a headlock and starts dragging Heidenreich towards the casket so at least he’s going smart early on. An armdrag into an armbar has Heidenreich close to the casket again as you can see a lot of empty seats popping up. Undertaker switches to the leg with a half crab so Heidenreich crawls to the rope, which is in front of the casket. No one ever accused him of making sense.

They head outside with Undertaker going face first into the casket as Heidenreich still isn’t coming off as interesting. Back in and Heidenreich hammers away in the corner while shouting that this is his world. Undertaker seems to disagree by grabbing a triangle choke on the top rope. Cue the taped up Snitsky to make the save and the double teaming is on. The casket is opened and Kane wakes up from his nap to pop out and make the second save.

Kane and Snitsky fight into the crowd as Heidenreich kicks the casket up the aisle. Undertaker goes knees first into the steps and it’s time to peel back the mats so we can get more violent. Heidenreich crushes him with the casket and it’s a cobra clutch to knock Undertaker out. Undertaker goes into the casket but keeps an arm out so the comeback can start.

The apron legdrop onto the casket onto Heidenreich gets the fans back into things but Undertaker walks into the swinging Boss Man Slam. Heidenreich covers due to general numbskulledness and Undertaker makes another comeback, this time with a bad looking running DDT. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish Heidenreich.

Rating: D. It’s not good, but this could have been a lot worse. Heidenreich got in some offense and didn’t feel as much like a chore to watch this time around, but this feud was done a month ago. The Kane and Snitsky stuff was pretty early on so the match was almost divided in half with a short piece in the middle. Somehow, we’ll call this better than expected, though that’s not the highest expectation.

Long demands Eddie give Flair’s number back and Evolution comes in to make it happen. Eddie gives it back and almost gets away with Flair’s wallet. With Eddie gone, HHH wants to talk to Batista about the Randy Orton match but Batista wants to go get his number first. HHH says NOW and Flair has to intervene.

Long comes back in to see Bischoff as Christian and Tyson Tomko are ready to draw their numbers. Christian and Tomko say they both signed a petition to get rid of Long and then draw. As Christian is happy, here’s John Cena to interrupt. Cena to Bischoff: “Loved you in Boogie Nights.” Christian wants a battle rap of all things and tells Tomko to give him a beat. Tomko: “No.” Christian manages to rhyme Transylvania with Wrestlemania but Cena goes with the gay jokes to win the audience’s approval.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Big Show vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL is defending. Angle chills on the floor to start and JBL actually starts swinging at Show. That’s quite courageous of him. Stupid as it works as well as you would expect, but courageous. Show catches him with a slam out of the corner and the legdrop gets two with Angle making a fast save. That’s fine with Show, who is right back up and knocks the two of them outside.

JBL gets posted and the power of the big hips knock Angle away as it’s all Show in the early going. Show sets up the steps next to the announcers’ and I don’t see this ending well. The super chokeslam is loaded up but Angle hits him low, setting up a monitor shot to knock Show through the table. Angle and JBL get back in with Angle grabbing an armbar, which feels a little out of place a giant just fell off the steps and through a table.

Some German suplexes fit the bill a bit better but the Angle Slam is escaped. JBL’s big boot gets two but Show is back in with a double clothesline. Show starts throwing the two of them around and another double clothesline connects for good measure. A double chokeslam is broken up though and it’s a Clothesline From JBL/chop block from Angle to put the giant down again. Angle is smart enough to hit a quick German suplex to drop the champ, followed by an Angle Slam to Show for no cover as Angle’s back is hurt.

Show is back up with a chokeslam for two, followed by a tackle to put JBL through the barricade. That leaves Angle in the ring with a chair but a charge lets Show flapjack him onto it. Cue Jindrak and Reigns to go after Show as the Cabinet is here to put JBL on a stretcher. Show fights the two of them up the aisle, leaving Jordan to throw JBL back inside. The Clothesline From JBL puts Angle down to retain the title.

Rating: B. Another rather good match here and that’s not a surprise whatsoever after what has been a really good story. These three had an odd chemistry together and the match was a lot better than it probably should have been. If nothing else it was nice to not have the goons get involved until the end, and even then it was just for a distraction. JBL’s title reign continues to be far better than he’s given credit for with a match that was actually a lot of fun to watch.

Carlito tries to get Batista to sign his petition but a threat of violence gets rid of that. Batista goes in to draw his number as Bischoff and Long argue over World Title matches. Long says there is going to be a bunch of interference so Bischoff bans Evolution from ringside. Batista wants to tell HHH himself and seems very happy.

Wrestlemania XXI trailer featuring Eugene as Forrest Gump. I loved these things and most of them were rather clever.

We recap HHH vs. Randy Orton. HHH won the World Title back inside the Elimination Chamber, including pinning Orton. It took Batista’s help though so Orton beat Batista in a #1 contenders match to earn the shot. Orton is a complete lame duck challenger as the fans have moved on to Batista and everyone but Orton seems to know it.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is defending and Evolution is barred from ringside. Orton slaps him in the face to get things going and a backslide gets an early two. A rather high backdrop looks to set up a very early RKO so HHH bails to the floor, allowing Orton to take him down out there instead. Back in and Orton grabs Snake Eyes but the RKO is countered with a toss over the top and what could have been a scary looking landing.

A ram into the steps makes it worse for Orton and the RANDY SUCKS chants are just downright mean. HHH goes after the knee, which was attacked on Raw and not brought up until now. We go to the Ric Flair knee work package, including the Figure Four. The hold stays on for over a minute until HHH slaps him in the face, causing Orton to turn it over, albeit right into the ropes.

They head outside again with HHH being thrown over the announcers’ table, which isn’t exactly a big deal this time. Instead Orton takes him back inside for the backbreaker and the assorted punches in the corner. The high crossbody gets two but HHH gets in a knee. The Pedigree is countered so HHH hits the jumping knee to the face for two. Another Pedigree attempt doesn’t work so Orton blasts him with a clothesline. Orton slugs away in the corner but a grab of the rope blocks a DDT.

That’s enough to send Orton outside and the referee threatens to stop the match because Orton looks out of it. Instead Orton gets back in but HHH crashes into both of them for the ref bump. The sledgehammer is brought out but Orton trips him face first into the post. Orton can’t follow up though and it’s a hard clothesline to take him down again. The Pedigree retains the title in a finish that sums up Orton’s entire face run.

Rating: C-. That ending was terrible as Orton never even got in the big hope spot. Instead it was Orton getting knocked silly, not being able to do anything but keep himself from getting hit by the sledgehammer and then falling to the Pedigree anyway. These two seem incapable of having a really good match together and that was the case again here. As mentioned, Orton had no chance so it’s far from some miscarriage of justice, but it was disappointing.

Kurt Angle steals Nunzio’s Rumble spot under the threat of violence.

The drunken Cabinet comes in to Long/Bischoff’s office. Long isn’t happy and makes JBL vs. Big Show in a barbed wire cage match for No Way Out. That’s quite the escalation and JBL sobers up in a hurry.

Royal Rumble

Since this is the main event, here’s your trivia for the night: this is the first pay per view since the Wrestling Classic (and therefore the second ever to this point) to not have a tag team match. In case you were worried about a slow start, Eddie Guerrero is in at #1 and Chris Benoit is in at #2 with ninety second intervals. Eddie starts on the floor before coming in for the feeling out process, which doesn’t get anyone anywhere. They start striking it out and Daniel Puder is in at #3. He gets in but goes straight back to the floor to grab a mic, saying everyone here is about to witness history.

Puder gets inside and it’s time for Benoit and Eddie to chop the heck out of him, which might be Benoit’s specialty. Some suplexes make it even worse and it’s Hardcore Holly in at #4. Benoit and Eddie are willing to stand back and let Holly chop him as the point is becoming clear in a hurry. Holly hangs him over the rope for the kick to the gut and there’s an Alabama Slam.

Hurricane is in at #5 as Puder is tossed. This was WWE’s way of punishing/initiating Puder for being successful in Tough Enough, because WWE feels the need to torment people for getting over. Puder would never wrestle on the main roster again and I’d be surprised if he had a major appearance. Eddie throws Holly out during Hurricane’s entrance and Hurricane is thrown out a few seconds later, just as Kenzo Suzuki is in at #6. Eddie and Benoit double team him as well but Benoit throws Eddie to the apron in a smart move.

Edge is in at #7 and this should make things more interesting. Chops and right hands abound until Benoit knocks Edge back a bit. Rey Mysterio is in at #8 and as soon as we get rid of Suzuki, a heck of a tag match could break out (with any combination of teams). Rey’s headscissors gets rid of Suzuki but walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker from Eddie to put everyone down. Shelton Benjamin is in at #9 and goes after Rey, who snaps off a headscissors.

Booker T. is in at #10, giving us Booker, Eddie, Benoit, Benjamin, Edge and Mysterio (get one or two more and you have a month’s worth of quality stuff). Rey can’t headscissor Shelton out but here’s Bischoff to watch. Benoit gets the Sharpshooter on Eddie, which Rey breaks up with a springboard dropkick. Just in case we don’t have enough awesome talent in the ring, Chris Jericho is in at #11. Jericho goes after Edge with right hands and a belly to back suplex before switching over to Eddie in the corner.

That means a lot more punching and not very close eliminations by the ropes until Scotty 2 Hotty is in at #15. Hang on though as Hassan and Daivari jump him in the aisle and Scotty can’t get in. Oh well. If we can drop every man for himself, we can drop 30 to 29. The beatdown takes long enough that it’s Charlie Haas in at #16. Booker kicks him in the face though and then tosses Reigns and Jordan in a row. He stops for a Spinarooni though and that’s enough for Eddie to get the elimination.

The eliminations slow for a bit as Rene Dupree is in at #17. Haas and Benjamin get back together for the jump over onto Rene’s back. Shelton misses a Stinger Splash though and Edge gets the elimination. Simon Dean is in at #18 but before he gets in, we need some Hindu squats. The distraction lets Edge get rid of Eddie and Dean finally gets in…..so Shawn Michaels, in at #19, can superkick him out. Things slow down a bit until Shawn dumps Haas.

Kurt Angle is in at #20 and it’s suplexes a go-go until Shawn superkicks him out. To recap, we now have Benoit, Edge, Mysterio, Jericho, Dupree and Michaels. Coach is in at #21 and immediately starts grabbing the rope to save himself. Mark Jindrak is in at #22 but Angle gets back in and throws Shawn out, followed by a step shot to the head for some blood. Angle is finally dragged off and it’s Viscera in at #23.

Rey saves himself from elimination so Viscera slams him in the middle. With nothing else going on, Paul London is in at #24, nearly sliding all the way outside as he comes in. Dupree slams him down and we get the French Tickler. Jericho is smart enough to use the delay to toss Dupree (Tazz: “His tickler just got Frenched!”.). No one can get rid of Viscera so here’s John Cena in at #25 to pick things way up.

Cena backdrops Viscera out on his own because WWE knows how to make someone look like a star in the Rumble. Gene Snitsky, who can run pretty well when he’s all taped up, is in at #26 to shoulder people down. Snitsky sends London to the apron and BLASTS him with a clothesline, sending London inside out for a highlight reel elimination. That gives us the Cena vs. Snitsky showdown with Snitsky hitting the big boot.

Kane is in at #27 and it’s chokeslams all around, with the one armed version to Mysterio looking great. Jindrak is out but Snitsky saves Coach of all people. The pumphandle slam drops Kane but none of that matters because Batista is in at #28 to bring the fans back to full strength (everyone knows it’s coming now and they’re fully on board the Batista train). Snitsky is out first and it’s time for the Kane showdown, with the full on BATISTA chants as background noise.

The Batista Bomb plants Kane and Batista throws Jericho out. Christian is in at #29 and gets beaten down by Cena as Rey hits the 619 on Kane. That’s enough for the FU to get rid of Kane (because Cena is smart enough to use a move like that next to the ropes). Rey and Cena set up an alliance and it’s Ric Flair in at #30, giving us a final field of Benoit, Edge, Mysterio, Coach, Cena, Batista, Christian and Flair. That’s quite the talent pool. Flair is smart enough to feed Coach into the spinebuster from Batista for the elimination and the same concept gets rid of Christian.

Benoit chops Flair in the corner but takes the big spinebuster as well. That’s it for Benoit but Flair makes the mistake of trying to toss Batista as well. Edge and Mysterio are smart enough to dropkick Batista at the same time with Edge getting rid of Flair (makes sense). That leaves us with Edge, Mysterio, Batista and Cena. Edge hits the spear on Batista and Cena but gets caught by the 619. Rey tries one too many runs off the ropes though and gets sent to the apron for a spear to the floor. Cena and Batista toss Edge and we’re down to the only two people who ever had a shot to win this thing in the first place.

Neither can hit their finisher and the fall out to the floor in the unplanned finish. With the referees split, cue Vince McMahon, who made the mistake of trying to get up from the Gorilla Position in a hurry after three hours. He tries to slide in under the bottom rope and there goes his quad (must be a family trait).

Vince tries to get up and just goes down, so the referees plead their cases as Vince sits down next to the bottom rope. With all of the confusion, they take turns throwing each one over the top (Batista threw Cena first, which makes sense. Cena throwing Batista out after and thinking that would count is just kind of dumb.). Vince says restart the match (and then goes to the back, where he put too much weight on his good leg and tore that quad as well), but for some reason Eddie and Benoit are nowhere to be seen. Batista throws Cena out in about ten seconds to officially win.

Rating: B+. If they could have nailed the ending, this is an all time classic. As it is, it’s just shy of great and that’s a pretty awesome place to be. Cena and Batista were all that mattered here and that was where they went for the ending, but the stuff before that was more than very good as well. They stacked the first half with talent and then had the very well done Angle vs. Shawn segment, which sets up a major match at Wrestlemania. By the time they were done, Cena showed up to bridge things to the ending. All in all, it’s a second tier Rumble at worst and just makes the end of the all time best list at best.

Overall Rating: A-. The Rumble is such a unique show as the one match can carry the rest of the card either up or down. In this case that’s very helpful as the four undercard matches nearly cancel each other out, with a pair of good ones, the bad casket match and the not very good Raw World Title match. What matters here though is they didn’t play any games with the ending and went with their strongest options at the finish. It was the right play and the only thing they could have done. Batista and Cena’s rockets are being attached to their backs and that’s what they have to do. Very good show and bordering on classic.

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Monday Night Raw – July 7, 2008: Hurry Up So They Can Bash

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 7, 2008
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s probably not a good sign that I haven’t done one of these in so long that I barely remember what is going on. The big story is CM Punk cashing in Money In The Bank last week on Edge to win the World Heavyweight Championship, bringing a World Title to Raw. We’re also on the way to the Bash and that is going to need a card. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Punk winning the title and his first title defense against JBL last week. JBL declaring martial law is not exactly the most interesting idea, and John Cena/Cryme Tyme seem to agree.

Stephanie McMahon asks everyone to pull together in Vince McMahon’s absence.

Here is Vickie Guerrero in the ring to get things going. She is here to protest CM Punk being the World Heavyweight Champion and is not leaving until the title is surrendered to her. An apology is demanded and here is Punk to respond. Vickie yells at him and says Edge is so close to falling apart that he has called off their wedding! Punk says he probably did them a favor and explains the Money In The Bank concept. Maybe Vickie can find someone cute on Smackdown, like the Great Khali! Vickie stands up and slaps him, so Punk wheels her into the corner.

Cue JBL in his limo to interrupt and say Punk’s reign is coming to an end. JBL challenges for the title, saying Vince McMahon would give him the shot. Punk brings up that Vince isn’t here, but John Cena certainly is. Cena mocks JBL for blaming a variety of things on not being champion and doesn’t really want to hear about it. Maybe Cena should listen to Punk, who shakes Cena’s hand.

In reality, there is no one in charge around here, so we need to figure out Punk’s next challenger. Cena thinks he and JBL should have some kind of #1 contenders match, but here is Batista who wants in as well. Batista says Punk deserves the title after last week and also says hi to Vickie, who made him miserable on Smackdown. He feels sorry for her…but nah, because he really can’t stand her.

As for the title, Punk cashed in after Batista took Edge out but JBL cuts Batista off instead. Cena calms things down by suggesting a triple threat #1 contenders match tonight. JBL doesn’t like it so Cena says that means JBL is out entirely. That gets JBL in the triple threat, but now it’s Kane interrupting. He wants in too so Punk thinks we have a fatal four way. And that’s finally it!

Rey Mysterio vs. Santino Marella

Rey sends him into the corner to start but a faceplant gives Marella a breather. A camel clutch is broken up but Rey misses a 619, only to knock Santino down without much effort. Rey hits a jumping double stomp of all things and the 619 into the top rope splash gives Rey the fast pin.

CM Punk is…interrupted when a light falls down. Anyway, he’ll face anyone but Snitsky of all people comes in to say he wants a fight. Works for Punk.

John Cena and Mickie James are talking about last night when Kelly Kelly comes up to talk about their tag match. Cena is amazed that Kelly got out of her ECW contract, but apparently it didn’t exist.

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall/Layla

Jillian grabs Mickie’s arm to start and is quickly pulled into a headlock. Kelly comes in with a sunset flip for two and a hurricanrana gets the same. Layla gets in a cheap shot though and Jillian rams Kelly’s face into the mat over and over. They go to the corner and Kelly manages a victory roll for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was about all you could expect from this match as Mickie was barely involved. It seems that Kelly might be the next in line to get a push but she is going to need a lot of work in the ring to really make that happen. She has to start somewhere though and the whole gymnast thing can get her at least a few steps forward.

Here is JBL’s limo…with JBL walking beside it. He can’t open the doors….so here is John Cena, holding a crowbar, to pop out instead. Cena says Louisiana has strict laws involving limousines and this one will never pass inspection. Fortunately for JBL, Cena knows two guys who can help get parts quick. We hear about some of those limo laws, with Cryme Tyme (carrying some large bats/pipes) helping to fix the limo up a bit. One more thing though: it needs a custom paint job! Spray painting ensues as a bonus. Cena: “Fine work by the Cryme Tyme Body Shop. It is sure worth the drive.”

We look at the cash-in again.

CM Punk vs. Snitsky

Non-title. Punk strikes away to start but dives into a bearhug, allowing Snitsky to drive him into the corner. Snitsky’s elbow gets two and the bearhug goes on again. More strikes get Punk out of trouble again and the running knee in the corner sets up a bulldog. The GTS gives Punk the pin.

Video on Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho, with Michaels’ eye being heavily damaged.

Here is Michaels to say he accepts Jericho’s challenge for the Great American Bash. Cue Jericho with Lance Cade, with Jericho saying he knew Michaels would accept. Michaels can’t help himself because all of the beatings haven’t taught him anything. Now Michaels is going to get beaten up again, even though he’s just another legend fighting for one more chance. Does Michaels want to be a martyr for all of these people? Are they going to pay for him if he loses everything?

Like every other martyr, Michaels is going to be swept underneath the rug and forgotten. Michaels talks about how he could leave wrestling today and be remembered forever. No matter what he has done, the fans seem to keep giving him a pass. Jericho doesn’t think that’s fair, but Michaels talks about what Jericho has done in his career. In spite of all that though, Jericho will never have peace because he will never be Michaels. And there’s the core of the story and that makes the story so much better.

Kofi Kingston vs. Charlie Haas

Non-title. Haas grabs a headlock to start but can’t get very far as Kofi strikes away. A cravate with knees to the face have Kingston down for two and we hit the chinlock. Kofi fights up with some dropkicks into the Boom Drop and the spinning kick to the face finishes Haas off in a hurry.

Rating: C. Not much to this one as they only had a few minutes. It doesn’t help that Haas hasn’t meant anything in a long time now so there was only so much drama about anything happening. I’m sure Kingston will get an opponent worthy of a title shot soon enough, but that isn’t Haas right now and they didn’t treat him as anything else.

Post match Paul Burchill runs in and lays Kingston out.

Batista is walking….and a fan randomly runs in to do his pose before running off again.

Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena vs. Kane

For the World Title shot at the Great American Bash. The brawl starts fast with JBL booting Cena down for an early two. All four of them slug it out and we take an early break. Back with Kane elbowing Cena in the face and ripping at said face in the corner. Batista hits a spinebuster for two on JBL with Kane making the save and planting Batista with a chokeslam. JBL breaks up the FU to Kane and everyone is left down.

It’s Cena up first to clean house, including an FU to Batista for two. We take another break and come back again with Kane breaking up the Shuffle to JBL. Batista starts cleaning house and kicks a downed Kane in the face. The Clothesline From JBL hits Batista but Cena pulls JBL into the STFU. That’s broken up so Cena and JBL double team Kane down. Everyone but Cena fight to the floor, with Kane knocking JBL over the barricade. Back in and Batista spears Kane for the fast pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t some kind of a classic or anything but they kept things moving here and it made for an entertaining match as a result. I had fun with this and giving Batista the title shot is an interesting way to go. Punk vs. JBL isn’t interesting, Cena would be an overwhelming favorite over Punk and Kane doesn’t feel like a World Title challenger. That leaves Batista as the just right choice and he got there in an entertaining fight.

Post match Batista leaves so Kane can snap and beat up people working at ringside. Kane yells at commentary and drags Cole inside, telling Cole to ANSWER ME. Jerry Lawler chop blocks Kane to save Cole but gets beaten up to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. They don’t have much time to get ready for the Great American Bash at this point so moving rather quickly like this is a good idea. The World Title match is now set and Michaels vs. Jericho got a nice boost. This show felt like it got some things done in the span of two hours and that is not something you often see with Raw. Good enough show here, as the Bash is coming together rather quickly.

 

 

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NXT – November 21, 2023: Get A Recap

NXT
Date: November 21, 2023
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Booker T.

The big story around here seems to be a still unspecified scandal at Chase U, which played a role in the team losing the Tag Team Titles last week. Other than that, we’re about two and a half weeks away from Deadline and two sets of Iron Survivor Challenge qualifying matches are still on the docket. Two of them go down tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

NXT Heritage Cup: Chad Gable vs. Noam Dar

Dar is defending and all of the expected friends are here too. Round one begins with a feeling out process until Gable grabs the wristlock. They go to the mat with Gable grinding away on the arm before switching into a front facelock. A takedown gives Gable two and the ankle lock goes on. Dar grabs the rope and blocks a German suplex as the round ends.

Round two begins with Gable running him over and not liking Dar slapping him in the face. An annoyed Gable chops away and gets two off a release German suplex. An armbar over the ropes looks to set up rolling Chaos Theory but Oro Mensah gets in a cheap shot. The Nova Roller gives Dar the pin at 2:22 of the round and 5:57 overall.

Round three begins during a break and we come back with Gable catching him on top. A top rope superplex gives Gable two as the round ends. Round four begins with a strike off until Gable takes him down. A top rope headbutt (and a long one at that) gives Gable two but Dar kicks him down on the apron. Back in and a spinning elbow gives Dar two but he can’t get anywhere with a rear naked choke. They slug it out from their knees until the round ends.

Round five begins with Gable hitting a rolling Liger kick to the head, followed by rolling Chaos Theory to tie it up at 17 seconds of the round and 14:51. Round six (final round) begins…after a cheap shot from Dar between the rounds so Dar can hit a running elbow in the corner at the bell. Dar slugs away but the Nova Roller is countered into an ankle lock. That’s reversed into a rollup with tights for two so Gable is back with a DDT for two of his own. The ankle lock, with grapevine, goes on but time runs out for the draw at 18:30 total.

Rating: B-. Are you surprised Dar didn’t lose? You really shouldn’t be, as this is what happens in these matches. Dar gets in trouble, cheats, and escapes with the Cup. The Cup has had six holders over about three years and Dar has held it for well over half of that time. Heck he didn’t even lose the fall the last time he lost the Cup. Dar can be funny with his stuff and such but my goodness it’s ok to let something change for a bit.

Dar taps immediately after the bell but it’s still a draw. Otis beats up Oro Mensah and hits on Lash Legend, who looks close to being sick.

JBL picks his Iron Survivor Challenge matches: Carmelo Hayes vs. Josh Briggs and Blair Davenport vs. Thea Hail.

Tony D’Angelo and Stacks go to dinner, with Stacks asking how bad it is for Chase U. D’Angelo doesn’t want to talk about it but the rest of the Family is there for a title celebration.

Trick Williams checks on Carmelo Hayes before his qualifying match. Hayes is ready and Williams will be in his corner, but Hayes asks to do this by himself. Cool with Williams as everything seems fine.

Women’s Title: Xia Li vs. Lyra Valkyria

Li is challenging…and jumps Valkyria in the entrance. No match.

Malik Blade/Edris Enofe vs. Humberto Carrillo/Angel Garza

This was scheduled for later but was moved up due to the Li attack. Carrillo takes Enofe down to start but Blade comes in with a good looking dropkick. Garza gets knocked off the apron but Blade gets sent outside. A hard shot to the chest has Blade in trouble as Booker goes on a rant about getting titles.

The Gory Bomb/flipping cutter combination gets two on Blade, who comes back with some shots to the face. A DDT gets Blade out of trouble and there’s the tag off to Enofe as the fans don’t seem to care. Everything breaks down and Enofe misses a 450, allowing Carrillo to hit a powerbomb. A pop up kick to the ribs finishes Enofe at 5:32.

Rating: C+. The match had its moments with Enofe and Blade getting to show off their athleticism, plus Carrillo and Garza’s snappy double teaming. I can go for Garza and Carrillo getting into the title hunt as they’re a rather awesome team, but they need to string some wins together first. This was a good start, though I’m not sure how much value there is in beating Blade and Enofe.

Fallon Henley and Brooks Jensen fire up Josh Briggs but he’s ready to take this opportunity on his own.

Iron Survivor Challenge Qualifying Match: Carmelo Hayes vs. Josh Briggs

Briggs tries to go with the power to start but gets dropkicked out to the floor. That works a bit better for Briggs, who hits a big boot but Hayes is right back with the Fade Away. The fans seem pleased with Hayes, only to have Briggs drop him with a right hand. Back in and Briggs works on the arm but Hayes low bridges him to the floor. Briggs sends him over the announcers’ table and we take a break.

Back with Briggs taking over again and hammering away before grabbing a chinlock. Hayes fights up and hits a springboard shot to the face but one heck of a chokeslam puts Hayes down. Commentary keeps playing up the idea of Briggs not being an experienced singles star as Hayes comes back. Cue Lexis King for a distraction though, allowing Briggs to drop Hayes again. A moonsault gives Briggs the big upset pin at 12:32.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a great match but it told a nice story of Hayes being the more experienced singles star and Briggs using the straight power because he didn’t have the experience in singles matches. The King interference plays into the Hayes/Trick Williams deal as we have to be coming up on a twist. Odds are we get Hayes vs. King at Deadline, which should be a big step forward in whatever they’re doing, but for now we have a nice surprise win for Briggs.

Lyra Valkyria says the title match is still happening.

Von Wagner shows up at Mr. Stone’s house for dinner with some partially eaten brownies. They eat with Stone’s wife and kids, who eat rather quickly like Wagner. The sons look at Wagner’s scar, but it’s cool with him. We hear about bullies at their school and Wagner wants violence but Stone says we don’t do that. With the parents away, Wagner says write the bullies’ names down because Wagner has them. This was wacky shenanigans.

Here is Wes Lee for a chat. The people know who he is so he gets to the point: he wants one more shot at Dominik Mysterio and the North American Title at Deadline. Cue Mysterio (no Rhea Ripley) to list off Lee’s losses, which mean he shouldn’t get a title shot. Lee points out how many times Judgment Day has had to save Mysterio and says he’s willing to do anything to get the title back. Mysterio is interested, but Lee has to beat some former North American Champions. Lee is in, but Deadline is his last shot, assuming he gets there.

We recap the Chase U scandal, with Andre Chase breaking his silence next week.

Thea Hail is panicking because Andre Chase and Duke Hudson aren’t here. Jacy Jayne says she always has Hail’s back.

Josh Briggs is happy with his win when Tiffany Stratton comes in to congratulate him. With her gone, Brooks Jensen and Fallon Henley come in, with Henley not being happy over Stratton being there.

Iron Survivor Qualifying Match: Thea Hail vs. Blair Davenport

Jacy Jayne is here with Hail as Davenport goes after the arm to start. Davenport runs her over for two and we’re off to the armbar. Hail fights up and strikes away but gets pulled into a Fujiwara armbar. That’s broken up and Jayne offers a distraction, allowing Hail to hit a fall away slam on the floor. Back in and Hail is distracted by the lack of support from the student section, which lets Davenport block a backsplash. A knee to the face finishes Hail at 4:08.

Rating: C. This was short and to the point as the Chase U ordeal continues to cause the team trouble. I’m almost scared of where this is going but Jayne and Hail seem like they could split off from Chase U without much trouble. Davenport going forward is fine, but at some point Hail needs to get a bigger win before she loses the steam that she has.

We get a video on Baron Corbin vs. Ilja Dragunov, highlighting their differences in training, style and philosophy on their way to the Deadline title match. Dragunov is alone in America as his family is in Russia, while Corbin has everything he could want. Playing up the contract is always a good angle to take and they’re doing a nice job setting this up.

Charlie Dempsey vs. Eddy Thorpe

Dempsey’s friends are here too. Dempsey takes him down without too much trouble and cockily stomps away. Thorpe’s comeback is cut off in short order and we hit the abdominal stretch to work on Thorpe’s ribs. With that broken up, Thorpe hits a running boot in the corner and Dempsey cranks on the arm…until Thorpe reverses into a cradle for the surprise pin at 3:59.

Rating: C. Pretty much a squash here until the fluke ending, which is a good thing as Thorpe has been needing a boost after some recent setbacks. Dempsey and company continue to be a fine midcard heel stable, but they aren’t going to matter much if they don’t win a bit here and there. For now though, Thorpe winning is a good way to go and maybe he can start going somewhere. As for Dempsey, at least commentary is making “Regal” references during his matches.

Post match Dempsey’s friends get in the ring to beat Thorpe down so posing can ensue.

Back at the dinner, Tony D’Angelo and Stacks are given envelopes of money, some of which are more successful than others. They go to leave, where Humberto Carrillo and Angel Garza jump them and speed off.

Arianna Grace isn’t happy with Karmen Petrovic attacking her and hopes Petrovic can get some help.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Women’s Title: Lyra Valkyria vs. Xia Li

Valkyria is defending and is banged up after the attack earlier tonight. The fired up Valkyria goes right after Li to start but gets knocked into the corner for some choking. A running dropkick gets Valkyria out of trouble and Li is knocked outside. Back in and another kick drops Valkyria as we take a break.

We come back with Valkyria fighting out of a cravate but getting caught with a swinging neckbreaker for two. Li grabs a facelock but Valkyria fights up again to strike away. The spinning torture rack drop cuts Valkyria off for two more but she blocks a kick. A German suplex puts both of them down and we get a breather. Back up and Li’s spinning kick misses, allowing Valkyria to hit one of her own. A Samoan driver finishes for Valkyria at 9:40.

Rating: B-. It was a nice fight, but there was only so much you could do after Li had a heck of a match with Becky Lynch last night. They stacked the deck against Valkyria a bit here and it made things more interesting, but it was hard to buy Li as a real threat. The idea here seemed to be giving Valkyria a nice win and that’s not a bad thing.

Overall Rating: C+. I wasn’t overly interested in this show as it felt more like the show where things were set up for later rather than anything really happening here. It’s not a bad show and the action was fine, but this was definitely a week where you would be better off reading a recap than watching it live. Deadline is shaping up well enough, though they’ll need some more interesting shows on the way there.

Results
Noam Dar vs. Chad Gable went to a draw
Humberto Carrillo/Angel Garza b. Malik Blade/Edris Enofe – Pop up kick to Blade’s ribs
Josh Briggs b. Carmelo Hayes – Moonsault
Blair Davenport b. Thea Hail – Knee to the face
Eddy Thorpe b. Charlie Dempsey – Rollup
Lyra Valkyria b. Xia Li – Samoan driver

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 30, 2008: The Solution To A Problem

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 30, 2008
Location: Ford Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Attendance: 9,800
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with the Draft and that means things are changing around here in a big way. There are some new stars, but the interesting part is that the top champion is currently the new Intercontinental Champion, Kofi Kingston. Both World Titles are on Smackdown and the ECW Title is in ECW, which means something is going to have to change. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince McMahon being taken out at the end of Million Dollar Mania.

Shane McMahon joins us to say that since his dad is a private man, we won’t be talking about what happened last week. Everyone here needs to pull together in this time of uncertainty.

Opening sequence.

Here is Jim Ross to get things going. JR is grateful to be here and is thankful for everyone who has come along with him. He is starting a new journey on Smackdown and hopes everyone comes with him as they take the show to places it has never gone before. We also get a special thank you to Jerry Lawler, who JR refers to as his older brother. JR puts Michael Cole over as his successor (the fans boo anyway) before talking about his history here in Oklahoma City. He doesn’t seem too thrilled with Vince McMahon, who is probably a Longhorn fan.

Anyway, he asks we join him on Smackdown and eat more barbecue…but here are Edge, Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder to interrupt. Edge says he had to be here because JR’s arrogance amazes him. Why should anyone care about him? Or the Sooners? Or JR’s relationship with Jerry Lawler? It’s not all bad though, because now JR can come to Smackdown and start his real Hall Of Fame career. Instead of STONE COLD, it’s going to be EDGE WINS!

Edge wants him to try it but JR drops the mic instead. With that, Edge has Hawkins and Ryder escort JR out, leaving him to talk about how Vickie Guerrero and the Undertaker aren’t here. The Shawn Michaels, the John Cenas, the Rey Mysterios and more will never have a shot at the World Title and outside of a Draft show, you will never see him on Raw again. Edge goes to leave but cue Batista to get some revenge for last night. Batista sends him into various things and hits the Batista Bomb inside to leave Edge laying…..AND HERE IS CM PUNK WITH THE BRIEFCASE!

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Edge

Punk is challenging and hits the GTS to win the title! Well that’s one way to open the show.

Post break we get some replays as commentary hypes up how important that really was.

Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall

Non-title and Mickie is aghast as Jillian’s singing. Mickie knocks her outside to start and hits a slingshot dropkick through the ropes. Back in and Jillian goes after the bad arm before slamming her head first onto the mat. The handspring elbow misses in the corner though and the Mick Kick finishes Jillian out of nowhere.

Here is Rey Mysterio for a chat. First of all, Rey thanks CM Punk for bringing the World Title back to Raw. Rey likes the idea of being on the show but here is Santino Marella to interrupt. Santino officially welcome Rey to Mondays. However, he thinks that Rey is hiding behind the mask because he is ugly, stupid, or Batman. Santino thinks Rey is out for attention and we see a photo of Rey on the cover of WWE Magazine. Why wasn’t Santino’s picture used? We see said photo, which is Santino laid out on a bed with a flower in hand. Santino seems to threaten him so the beating is on, with Rey hitting the 619.

We look at CM Punk winning the World Title again.

Punk is so happy with his win and thanks Batista for the attempt. He thanks as many people as he can remember when JBL interrupts. JBL asks if Punk is proud winning a title that way before asking for a title shot tonight. Works for Punk.

Here is John Cena for a chat. No he didn’t win the title last night but he takes that loss with pride. Losing to HHH showed that they are the two best in the business but that brings us to tonight. CM Punk made history and that was awesome, though JBL tried to steal his spotlight. Cena likes Punk because he has brains and guts so he would have given anyone a title shot. Anyone from Harvey Wippleman to Downtown Bruno to Abe Knuckleball Schwartz to Cena himself.

That’s a good idea, and since there is no boss around here, let’s get Punk out here to make up his own mind. Instead here is JBL to say he’s facing Punk tonight and that he’s declaring MARTIAL LAW in WWE. JBL brings out security to escort Cena out of the building because he more or less runs WWE these days. Security and JBL beat him down and Cena is (finally) carried out. Well that didn’t make Cena look very good.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Darren Wade/Steve Anthony

Non-title. Cody takes Anthony down without much effort to start and it’s quickly off to DiBiase for some stomping. The DDT gives Cody the fast pin.

Post match Rhodes talks about how annoying Hardcore Holly was, with his talk about doing things the “right way”. All that got Cody was a job carrying Holly to keep the baby boomer’s career alive. You don’t tell someone as talented as Cody to pay his dues because he couldn’t even focus on himself. So he moved over to a new partner who is young, good looking and dynamic. DiBiase talks about how people under thirty are spoiled but they took matters into their own hands, which makes them….priceless.

Katie Lea Burchill and Paul Burchill talk about how she should be/will be Women’s Champion. He goes to deal with something so here is Jamie Noble to hit on her. Noble plans to go up to the biggest, meanest guy around and go after him. Cue Kane so Noble goes up to him for the threats, including a knock knock joke with a threat as the punchline. Kane sends him running off. Noble comes running into the arena with Kane following. While Noble manages a few shots of his own, the beating doesn’t take long and Noble is chokeslammed onto the announcers’ table.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kingston is defending in a rematch after winning the title last night. Before the match, an annoyed Jericho talks about how WWE.com called him Y2 Jaded after he was cheated out of the Intercontinental Title. As for tonight, Shawn Michaels isn’t in the building, which is what Jericho has heard for weeks now. Believe it or not, Shawn is involved in another lie! There is a problem with Shawn’s eye but Jericho is challenging him for the Great American Bash.

With that out of the way, we’re ready to go and we’re joined in progress after a break with Jericho working on a neck crank. Kofi fights up and hits a running forearm into the Boom Drop. Back up and Jericho gets a boot up in the corner, setting up the Lionsault for two. They trade rollups with both using the tights but only Jericho gets caught….and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but this was about Jericho making his challenge for Shawn Michaels and being all upset. That’s a fine way to go and it makes for a different way to go for Jericho. This is one of the more interesting things on either show at the moment and the match with Shawn should be awesome.

Post match Jericho lays Kofi out.

We look back at the CM Punk title win.

Edge blames Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins for his loss and tells them to get in the car and drive him away.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Punk is defending and cue JBL’s security as we get going. JBL takes over in the corner to start as the fans are cheering for Cena. Back up and Punk knees him out to the floor, where JBL hits a heck of a clothesline. A boot to the face hits Punk as the fans are getting behind the champ for a change. JBL grabs a sleeper but Punk elbows his way out and gets a boot up in the corner. Punk kicks him in the head and hits the springboard clothesline for two. Cue John Cena and Cryme Tyme to brawl with the security, with the distraction letting Punk hit the GTS to retain.

Rating: C. This was another short match that didn’t exactly make Punk look like a star but he did get the pin. It just might not be the best sign that the fans were chanting for John Cena, though that was kind of the problem with what happened earlier tonight. For now though, it’s a nice enough start for Punk, who played the underdog well here.

Punk gets in on the fight to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well this show was all about making CM Punk the new champ and setting up JBL as the top heel against both Punk and John Cena. That might make sense on paper, but there is the fact that it’s JBL getting this much time. He’s in his slow talking phase here and hearing him talk about how rich and powerful he is isn’t going to last long. At the same time, there is the Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho feud, which should be a lot better once Shawn is back.

 

 

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Night Of Champions 2008 (2023 Redo): Gold Only Gets You So Far

Night of Champions 2008
Date: June 29, 2008
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 16,151
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mike Adamle, Jim Ross, Joey Styles, Tazz, Mick Foley

We’re done with the Draft and this is the final show before we enter the new reality, starting with next week’s TV. Tonight has a pretty stacked card as the focus is on championships, including Edge defending the Smackdown World Title against Batista and John Cena challenging HHH for the Raw World Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how important it is to be a champion, with people promising this will be their night. We get more specific looks at the bigger matches as well.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Hornswoggle/Finlay

Miz and Morrison are defending. Finlay and Morrison start things off with an elbow dropping Morrison for a fast two. Back up and Morrison sends him into the corner and out to the floor, where Morrison and Miz grab Hornswoggle. Back in and Hornswoggle wants to fight but Finlay comes in to do it for him so house can be cleaned. Stereo seated sentons hit the champs but Morrison kicks Finlay in the head to take over.

The slingshot elbow/backbreaker combination gets two on Finlay but he’s back with an atomic drop. Hornswoggle tags himself in to pick up the pace until Morrison cheap shots him down. A double clothesline cuts off Hornswoggle’s comeback attempt but Miz misses the charge in the corner. Hornswoggle kicks Morrison away and the hot tag brings Finlay back in. Everything breaks down and Finlay hits the Celtic Cross on Morrison, only to have Miz break up the Tadpole Splash. Morrison slams Hornswoggle off the top to retain.

Rating: C+. This could have been so much worse as Hornswoggle and Finlay worked well together as a team and at least it was a fresh set of opponents for Miz and Morrison. While there aren’t a lot of options for challengers, they have more or less cleaned out the division and it was time to find someone new to come after the belts. Finlay and Hornswoggle did well for a one off challenge and it was a pretty nice match as well.

We look at John Cena beating HHH in the main event of Wrestlemania XXII. They really are making the rematch feel like a huge deal and that’s great to see.

US Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Matt Hardy

Chavo, with Bam Neely, is challenging. They fight over a lockup to start until Matt gets in a quick takedown. Chavo is right back with a headlock takeover, only to get backdropped to put him down again. With the grappling not working, Chavo starts in on the leg and wraps it around the ropes. Neely helps out by wrapping the leg around the post and Chavo cranks away back inside.

Matt avoids something off the middle rope though and hits a quick Side Effect. The middle rope elbow connects for two so Matt goes up again, only to get pulled into a half crab. That’s broken up but so is the Twist of Fate as Chavo gets the half crab again. Matt makes the ropes so Chavo tries the Three Amigos. That’s countered into the Twist of Fate to retain the title.

Rating: C. As you might have expected, these two worked a completely fine match against each other but it wasn’t the most thrilling. Chavo just isn’t someone who feels like he’s going to win that prestigious of a title, even if Matt is about to take it to ECW. Completely fine match, but nothing that stuck out in any meaningful way.

We look at the end of Million Dollar Mania.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Kane is defending and Henry was added after beating Kane on ECW. They start fast with Kane hammering away and avoiding a Henry splash in the corner. Henry is knocked outside, leaving Show and Kane to slug it out. Kane’s running DDT gets two but Show knocks him outside again. Show and Henry get their big showdown, with Henry’s running shoulder having almost no effect. A clothesline and slam put Henry down as trainers come out to check on Kane.

Show drops Henry again but it’s too early for a chokeslam. Instead they collide again for a double knockdown, allowing Kane to come back in. Alternating corner clotheslines set up a whip to send Henry into Show’s raised boot. The double chokeslam plants Henry but Show and Kane argue over who gets the cover. Kane hits an enziguri but Show knocks him out of the air for two. Something close to an Angle Slam gives Show two more so he goes up, only to get superplexed back down. Kane is down as well though and Henry hits a splash for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. They went with the straight up monster mash formula here and as luck would have it, the people involved know exactly how to do that match. This was a perfectly entertaining match with Henry getting the win that he has deserved after the last few weeks of being a monster. Good stuff here with the right result.

Batista is ready to move to Raw with the Smackdown World Title. John Cena comes in to say he’s winning too, but here is CM Punk to say the Money In The Bank briefcase is getting heavy.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./???

Rhodes and Holly are defending and DiBiase’s mystery partner is….not here yet, so maybe we can wait ten minutes. That won’t happen so we’ll start the match anyway. Cody starts for the team but DiBiase wants Holly….who gets dropped by Cody with a DDT. DiBiase announces Cody as his partner and gives Holly a cobra clutch legsweep for the pin and the titles. That’s certainly the twist and my goodness it’s better than Holly and Cody’s lame team.

JBL, in a luxury box, is upset that he’s not in a match on the show. Todd Grisham suggests it’s because he isn’t a champion so JBL goes into a speech about how he is successful while the American economy is crumbling. With Vince McMahon gone, he is the richest man in WWE (as we have back to back rich villain segments). He’s also more successful than Mark Cuban (Dallas Mavericks owner) because he doesn’t see any championship banners around here.

JBL mocks the Dallas Cowboys and praises HIS New York Giants, the Super Bowl champions. Everyone loves a champion, and that is why he is Texas’ favorite New Yorker. He’ll be getting a title soon enough. This was slow speaking JBL and that’s not exactly an inspiring change of pace.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. ???

Jericho is defending against a surprise opponent, which will NOT be Shawn Michaels. Since Michaels can’t make a thirty minute light, Jericho is here as an honest man to defend his title. Instead, he’s facing….Kofi Kingston, who came over to Raw in the Supplemental Draft. Lance Cade is here with Jericho, who drives Kingston into the face to start. A headlock takeover puts Kingston on the mat but he’s right back up. Jericho knocks him down again and doesn’t seem too worried to start.

Kingston picks up the pace with the rapid fire leapfrogs so Jericho bails outside, only to be taken down by a slingshot dive. Back in and Jericho dumps Kingston over the top for a big crash, followed by the stomping back inside. A suplex puts Kingston down for two more and Jericho bends his back over the knee. The abdominal stretch goes on but Kingston hiptosses his way to freedom.

Jericho’s belly to back superplex is turned into a crossbody for two and Kingston starts striking way. A clothesline into the Boom Drop gets two on Jericho and a hurricanrana gets the same. Jericho is right back with a knockdown into the Lionsault….but here is Shawn Michaels to superkick Cade. Jericho decks Shawn off the apron but the distraction lets Kingston hit Trouble In Paradise for the pin and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. That was a shock and that’s what they seemed to be trying to do. Shawn costing Jericho the title makes all the sense in the world as it gives Jericho a reason to want to get revenge on him despite Shawn not being able to wrestle. Good match too, as Kingston has that unique offense that makes him fun to watch.

Post match Shawn seems pretty banged up so Jericho hits him in the eye again to leave him laying.

Vickie Guerrero wants to talk wedding flowers with Edge when Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in. They say it’s too bad about HHH, who had to help Batista on Smackdown. Otherwise he could have helped Edge tonight, an idea that Edge doesn’t like. We hear Edge’s resume and he promises to keep the title tonight.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Katie Lea Burchill

Katie, with Paul Burchill, is challenging and grabs a rollup for a very fast two. They get back up with Mickie pulling her down by the arm and going up, which sends Katie bailing to the floor. Back in and Mickie kicks her down for two but a trip to the floor lets Katie take over. Katie suplexes her onto the arm to put Mickie in trouble and said arm is sent into the buckle. We hit the armbar and a DDT to the arm gives Katie two. Mickie comes out of the corner with a hurricanrana though and some clotheslines get two. Katie grabs a Fujiwara armbar but Mickie fights out again. Another suplex is blocked and a MickieDT retains the title.

Rating: C-. This could have been on any given Raw and it still would have been just as uninteresting. There is only so much to be gotten out of a match with a not so interesting challenger and such a basic story. It’s far from terrible, but they shouldn’t have even bothered if this was all they were allowed to do.

We recap Edge vs. Batista for the Smackdown World Title. Edge won the title at One Night Stand and Batista wants it. Violence has ensued.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Batista

Batista is challenging and wastes no time in powering Edge down. They head to the floor with Edge being sent into the barricade and shouldered down back inside. A Jackhammer gives Batista two and there’s a clothesline back to the floor as it’ all Batista so far. Batista throws him back in but Edge manages a posting for a much needed breather.

Edge Chokes on the ropes and drops an elbow on the apron but Batista slugs his way out of trouble. A swinging neckbreaker puts his right back in trouble though and Edge grabs the chinlock. Back up and Batista gets sent face first into the buckle, followed by a neckbreaker (non-swinging edition). That means we can hit the chinlock again but Batista is back up faster this time.

Edge gets taken down by a hard clothesline and we get a double breather. The spear gives Batista two and a powerslam puts him down again. Edge is right back with a much needed Edgecution but Batista knees the spear away. Batista goes up, only to get dropkicked out of the air to leave them down again.

Cue the Edgeheads with Vickie Guerrero as Batista hits the spinebuster, meaning Vickie has to make the save. Edge decks the referee so Vickie calls out another referee…and gets Chavo Guerrero (with Bam Neely). Batista grabs Vickie and throws her over the top and onto the pile, but Edge gets in a belt shot. Chavo counts the (actually not fast) pin to retain the title.

Rating: B-. The match was good for the most part, but then the ending was about as lame and uninspired of a choice as they could have had. It was just another La Familia run in ending, with the really slow count from the referee being the only thing missing. Granted almost none of this matters as Batista is on his way to Raw anyway, but I was hoping for more.

Batista gets the big emotional sendoff, which loses some of its impact when you keep in mind that he’ll be back tomorrow night.

HHH is ready to right the wrong of two years ago.

We recap HHH vs. John Cena for the former’s Raw World Title. This is billed as the biggest match Raw can have and goes back to HHH losing to Cena in the main event of Wrestlemania XXII. The build has gone well and it really does feel like a top level match.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging. HHH’s headlock doesn’t get him anywhere to start as Cena runs him over with a shoulder. A hiptoss works better for HHH so Cena grabs a headlock of his own. That works just as well so Cena hits another shoulder and the release fisherman’s suplex gets two. The flying shoulder misses though and Cena crashes out to the floor. Back in and Cena hits a suplex as the pace slows back down.

Cena fight back again and hits the ProtoBomb but the Shuffle is broken up. HHH hits the jumping knee but Cena is right back with the Throwback. Another Shuffle is cut off by another jumping knee but Cena sends him flying over the corner. HHH comes up holding his leg so Cena is right on it, including a wrap around the post. It’s too early for the STFU as HHH makes the ropes so HHH hits a desperation Pedigree for a delayed two.

Cena grabs an FU for the same and they’re both down. Back up and they slug it out until Cena hits another ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is blocked again and HHH tries a Pedigree, only to be reversed into the STFU. HHH goes for the rope so Cena pulls him back, allowing HHH to counter into a Crossface. Cena manages to stand but the FU is countered into the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a strange match as it sent over twenty minutes and definitely felt like a major fight, but it felt like they were only getting started when HHH got the pin. For once this could have gone for another five to ten minutes to really get going. The HHH leg stuff could have been something but it wasn’t really given time to develop. It’s not something that is said very often, but HHH needed more time for a change.

Replays and posing take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a good show but nothing you really need to go out of your way to see. The main event is the best thing on the show and even then it’s not a match you really need to see. They had an easy theme here with all of the title matches but even then, only the Tag Team Titles and the Intercontinental Title changes felt like moments, and even they were on the lower end of things. Overall, it’s certainly not a bad show, but they hyped it up as this major event and it just wasn’t.

 

 

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