New Year’s Revolution 2007
Date: January 7, 2007
Location: Kemper Memorial Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the first pay per view of the year with Raw running the annual early January show. This time around we have a double main event of John Cena defending the Raw World Title against the undefeated Umaga and a pretty big grudge match between D-Generation X and Rated-RKO, winner gets the exclusive hyphen rights. Let’s get to it.

The cage is lowered for the opening.

Opening sequence, featuring a look at the double main event and nothing else. That is probably a good idea.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

In a cage and Nitro, with Melina, is challenging. Nitro starts fast by hammering him around the ring early on and Hardy gets pounded down in the corner. Hardy is back with some right hands but a belly to back faceplant puts him down again. The Flying Chuck gets two on Hardy, who scores with the flying clothesline/half Sling Blade. The mule kick drops Nitro again but a Stunner over the top rope cuts Hardy off. Nitro drives him into the cage (first time it has been used so far) but Jeff is right back to cut off a climb attempt.

A dropkick sends Nitro back first into the cage and they both crash down. Hardy can’t get out yet, despite a heck of a jump to the top of the cage. Nitro belly to back superplexes him right back down but Hardy is back with a catapult into the cage. They both go up to the top and it’s a super Russian legsweep to bring them both back down. Hardy goes up so Nitro climbs onto him for the save, setting up a sunset bomb for another double knockdown. Nitro is up first and tries to climb out so Hardy pulls him…not down as Nitro has his legs tied in the cage, meaning Jeff crashes hard.

Since that is rather painful, Nitro comes back down and Jeff reaches for the cage, only to have Melina whip the wall with her belt. A missile dropkick puts Hardy down again but he counters a high crossbody into….something, but it puts them both down. It’s Nitro up first but Hardy pulls him over the top, only to have a super Twist of Fate broken up. Nitro starts climbing out as Hardy goes for the door, meaning Nitro climbs around to the door to stop him instead of, you know, jumping down. Melina blocks the door as a bonus, so Hardy kicks it open, crotching Nitro on the top in the process, and retains.

Rating: B-. This was built around the idea of two people going up and then crashing back down a lot, which is where Hardy excels. The ending was clever too so it was a pretty good way to go about the title match. It’s a smart choice for an opener as anyone can get into the idea of a cage match, especially between some people as talented as these two.

Rated-RKO can’t believe that they are being asked about how their issues with DX became personal. They have busted DX open and now they are fighting for their futures. Tonight, they’re finishing DX.

Tag Team Turmoil

Bonus match for the #1 contendership. The Highlanders are in at #1 and Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin are in at #2 to get things going. Rory and Haas start things off with neither getting very far, meaning it’s off to Robbie instead. Haas gets taken into the corner but Rory misses a charge in the corner, allowing the villains to take over. Benjamin gets to hit the jumping dive onto Rory’s back and Haas adds a slam onto the back for two.

The chinlock goes on but Shelton’s legs go off on a slam, allowing Rory to fall on top for two. Robbie comes in and gets to clean some house, including a belly to back suplex to Haas. Benjamin rakes Robbie’s eyes on top though and a top rope superplex is good for the pin. Jim Duggan/Super Crazy is in at #3 (much to commentary’s shock) with Duggan hammering and clotheslining Benjamin.

A running knee lift takes Duggan back down and the beating is on in the corner. Duggan hits the three point clothesline for a breather though and the hot tag brings in Crazy to pick up the pace. Crazy hits a basement dropkick on Haas but Benjamin hits a cheap shot from the floor, allowing Haas to grab a bridging German suplex for the pin. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch are in at #4 with Cade slamming Benjamin in a hurry.

An atomic drop sets up Murdoch’s big boot and the neck crank goes on. A neckbreaker finally gets Benjamin out of trouble and it’s back to Haas to (barely) pick up the pace. Haas flapjacks Murdoch to set up the Haas of Pain (an underrated hold) but Cade breaks it up, allowing Murdoch to steal the pin. Cryme Tyme is in at #5 as JR tries to figure out if there are any more teams left on the Raw roster. Given that we had one new team thrown in, that means the division is four teams, plus the champs who are barely involved with the rest of the teams.

Shad hammers Cade down to start but JTG dances a bit too long, allowing Murdoch to come back in. Commentary confirms that these are the last two teams and Murdoch elbows JTG down. Some choking with the tag rope keeps JTG in trouble but Murdoch dives into a raised boot. Cade breaks up the hot tag though because this match needs to keep going. JTG finally slides out of a double suplex though and it’s the hot tag to Shad so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and the G9 hits Cade to give Shad the pin.

Rating: D. This was long, not very interesting and showed how lame the tag division is at the moment. Cryme Tyme was the only option to win here and it could be a good Tag Team Title match, but this really did not need to go almost twenty minutes. Pretty bad match here, but much more boring than bad, which is even worse.

Vince McMahon and Jonathan Coachman are in the back with Vince complaining about how much Rosie O’Donnell and Donald Trump have been yelling at each other as of late. Coach thinks it sounds like something coming out of the WWE. Vince: “It sounds like something coming out of the WWE.” Therefore, we need to resolve it with physical abuse, meaning we can have a match between the two of them on Raw. Oh here we go. Coach is also glad that Vince has taken back YOU’RE FIRED and goes on about it so long that Vince leaves. Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase.

Ric Flair vs. Kenny Dykstra

Dykstra comes out in a Flair style robe. Before the match, he talks about knowing that Flair got hit with a Conchairto on Raw but just because Flair saying that he is “still recovering” is no excuse to not come out here and take his beating. Cue Flair in the pink robe and we’re ready to go. Commentary talks about how much Flair had accomplished by the time Kenny was born (four World Titles) as Dykstra hits the strut to start. A dropkick puts Flair down for an early two and there’s a fist drop to keep him in trouble.

Flair is right back with the chops and shots to the face, including a big chop to put Kenny on the floor. That’s too much waiting for Flair so he follows Kenny out, only to get suplexed for a hard landing. Back in and another suplex gives Kenny two, followed by a strutting elbow for the same. Kenny grabs a Boston crab to draw some screaming but Flair (very) eventually makes the rope.

Flair chops his way out of the corner but Kenny knocks him right back down. Kenny’s Figure Four attempt is countered into a small package for two and Flair unloads in the corner. For some reason Flair goes up top but gets slammed back down. A poke to the eye gives Flair a breather though and it’s time for some chop blocks. There’s a knee to the head and a step between the legs, setting up the Figure Four. Flair even gets in some slaps but Kenny finally makes the rope. They slug it out in the corner until Kenny gets in a quick low blow, setting up the small package for the pin.

Rating: D+. Much like the previous match, this wasn’t the most interesting match because Dykstra isn’t exactly thrilling to see most of the time. They’re playing up the idea that Flair doesn’t have it anymore, but the head injury wasn’t a factor and it was mainly Flair getting beaten up for ten minutes. I’ll give them points for trying with Kenny though, as they could use some fresh talent.

Melina checks on Johnny Nitro in the trainer’s room. Nitro says to call Joey Mercury because the Hardys are going to pay for what they did. Melina goes to make the call but runs into Victoria, who says Melina is the one Diva missing from her list. That’s because they can be a team who can take over the women’s division. If Melina helps her win the Women’s Title tonight, Melina can have the first title shot.

We recap Victoria’s hit list, setting up her title shot tonight.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Mickie James

Victoria is challenging and shoves Mickie down without much effort to start. Something like a Muta Lock has Mickie in trouble and Victoria shows off a bit by backflipping onto her feet. Mickie is back up with some armdrags into a dropkick for two but the hurricanrana out of the corner is broken up. Instead Victoria kicks her to the floor for a drop onto the apron. Back in and a hair toss gives Victoria two but she misses a moonsault.

Mickie slugs away for two and grabs a hurricanrana out of the corner. Cue Melina to check on Victoria so Mickie hits her in the face. The MickieDT is broken up by a Melina distraction. Cue Maria and Candice Michelle to take care of Melina as Mickie reverses the Widow’s Peak into a sunset flip for two. Mickie counters a slam into a tornado DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was kind of a mess and the ending didn’t make it much better. The problem here was that there wasn’t much of a reason to believe that Victoria was winning the title, even though she pinned Mickie a few weeks ago. Then you throw in the interference, which was hardly interesting either. Not terrible, but this show is needing a big pick up and this wasn’t it.

Post match Mickie, Candice, Maria and Lilian Garcia (who Victoria went after as well) celebrate.

We recap Rated-RKO vs. D-Generation X, which somehow is focused almost entirely on Ric Flair. Rated-RKO took Flair out and since DX are basically Flair’s kids, it’s time for some revenge. DX got beaten down as well though, even if that doesn’t make it quite as personal as the Flair stuff.

Tag Team Titles: Rated-RKO vs. D-Generation X

Rated-RKO is defending. Before the match, HHH uses his weird frosted cereal analogy and it still doesn’t quite work. The brawl starts in the aisle, as it should have in a feud this violent. HHH backdrops Edge onto the ramp and throws him inside for the bell and some right hands from Shawn. It’s already off to HHH to stomp away and sends Edge face first into the corner but Shawn misses a charge into the post. Orton gets to come in and hammer away in the corner, only to get snapmared down for a stomp to the face.

There’s an elbow on the apron from HHH and a legdrop from Shawn as the beating continues. Orton is a bit cut open so DX takes turns hammering away at the head. Edge’s cheap shot from the apron cuts HHH off though and the champs take over for the first time. HHH’s leg is wrapped around the post but he kicks a Figure Four attempt away to send Edge shoulder first into the post. The hot tag brings in Shawn to clean house and there’s the big dive to the floor to take out Edge and Orton.

They head back in, with Edge spearing Shawn off the apron and back to the floor. Orton gets in a belt shot to Shawn to bust him open as well (and much worse than Orton) and Edge is right there to hammer on the cut. Back in and Orton hits the rapid fire circle stomp for two and it’s off to Edge again for more right hands to the head. Orton forearms away at the back and strikes a pose, followed by some raking of the eyes. The double arm crank goes on but Shawn fights up for a suplex.

Edge hits a big boot though and it’s Orton coming back in to load up the RKO. Since that takes the better part of ever, Shawn shoves it away and it’s a double tag to bring in Edge and HHH. House is cleaned and there’s a facebuster into a clothesline to send Edge outside. The spinebuster hits Orton….and HHH has torn his quad again (meaning he’ll be gone until Summerslam). He is still able to hit (most of) a spinebuster on Edge for two but Orton hits an RKO (or as close as HHH can get to taking one).

Shawn superkicks Orton down and Edge covers HHH for two. Back up the spear hits corner, allowing HHH to hit a better than expected Pedigree. That seems to be all he had left though as he can’t really cover, with Orton making a save. Shawn sends Orton outside for a dive and hits the referee, followed by a pair of nasty chair shots. HHH gets a chair of his own as Orton is WAY busted open. DX unloads with chair shots and stands tall as the match is thrown out.

Rating: B. HHH managing to fight through the ending alone is worth a bonus as that is one of the more impressive things I’ve seen in a good bit. It was a good match leading up to the injury and then they kept it moving even after that. With the ending being the perfect way to keep things going and get out of a bad situation. HHH was impressive here but it’s a shame that he is going to be gone for so long.

Post match (Maybe?) it’s a Pedigree to put Edge onto (not through) the announcers’ table and Shawn’s elbow puts Orton through another announcers’ table.

John Cena is told that it is clear Umaga wants some, but will he get some. Cena does his movie trailer/hype man impression and manages to mock Umaga’s lack of English at the same time. Thankfully Cena gets serious and admits that he is up against a monster who has not been pinned or made to submit. He isn’t going to give up though because he is proud to call himself the WWE Champion. Umaga is undefeated but nothing lasts forever and nothing is stopping him from leaving as WWE Champion.

Orton’s blood is EVERYWHERE, with a pool of it laying on the floor.

Carlito vs. Chris Masters

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito. Masters bails into the corner to start so Carlito takes him down and hammers away with left hands. A backdrop gets Masters out of trouble but Carlito is right back with a shot to the face. The double springboard moonsault gives Carlito two but Masters throws him down with one arm. A backbreaker into a clothesline gets two on Carlito and Masters asks if he is trying to impress Torrie. Back up and Carlito hits a knee lift into a flapjack for two so Masters tries the Masterlock. That’s blocked as well but the counter is countered into a cradle (with trunks) to give Masters the pin.

Rating: C-. Another Raw level match here and that is not what the show needed. Masters and Carlito are not the most interesting people in the first place and now we get to see them having a pay per view match in the cool down spot. That isn’t exactly thrilling and I was hoping that they would get on with it already.

Post match Masters knocks Carlito out with the Masterlock.

We recap Umaga vs. John Cena for the Raw World Title. Umaga is an undefeated monster so he is getting a title shot. Before we get there, Umaga beat Cena up a few times but Cena isn’t backing down.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Umaga

Umaga is challenging and has Armando Alejandro Estrada in his corner. We’re ready to go after the Big Match Intros with Cena sticking and moving to start. A missed charge to the floor does a bit more damage but Cena goes after him again and gets tossed outside. Back in and Cena gets up an elbow and boot in the corner, earning himself a hard clothesline. Cena hammers away with right hands but gets taken down with a Samoan drop.

Umaga knocks him face first into the announcers’ table and then the barricade for a bonus. Back in and Cena can’t sunset flip or slam him, with Umaga falling on top for two on the latter. A legdrop gets two but Umaga misses a charge, allowing Cena to go up. The high crossbody is countered into the swinging release Rock Bottom for two as Umaga keeps the pace slow. Umaga sits down on Cena’s chest as JR compares him to Yokozuna. Another cannonball lands on raised knees but Umaga sends him outside without much effort.

The nerve holds keeps Cena in trouble and an elbow to the face drops him again. The middle rope Samoan Spike only hits mat though and Cena wins the slugout. Cena sends him head first into the post and the ProtoBomb drops Umaga again. Umaga is back with the belly to belly and hangs Cena in the Tree of Woe for the flying headbutt. The running Umaga Attack hits boots though and Cena grabs a rollup out of nowhere to retain the title.

Rating: B-. I really liked the finish here as it felt like the most out of nowhere finish they could have had. That’s also the smartest finish they could have had, as it would have been a bit waste to have Umaga go down to the FU. Umaga completely dominated here but got caught instead of getting beaten. That’s a perfect way to set up a rematch and I’d be down for another one. What they did worked well, even if it wasn’t a great match on the way there.

Post match Cena celebrates as Umaga breaks a lot of stuff to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The two major matches helped a lot but this was one of the most lifeless shows that I have seen in a very long time. It just wasn’t a very entertaining show with most of the matches being more boring than bad. There wasn’t much on here that felt pay per view worthy and while the two big matches worked, they didn’t work enough to make up for the rest of the show.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 1, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 15,169
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the first show of the year, along with being the go home show for New Year’s Revolution. That means things are going to pick up in a hurry, so we’ll start with….the Kevin Federline match. The best thing we can hope for here is that it is over in a hurry so we can move on to anything else, as the fifteen minutes have to be long past up. Let’s get to it.

Here are the most recent results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of John Cena vs. Kevin Federline. He has been a good celebrity but egads it feels bottom of the barrel.

Opening sequence.

John Cena vs. Kevin Federline

Non-title and they aren’t wasting time with this one. Federline comes out in a boxing robe and announces that Jonathan Coachman has made this No DQ. Therefore, here is Johnny Nitro to be in Federline’s corner, which does make sense. Nitro gives Federline his mouthpiece but hang on again as Federline has to put on his gloves. Hang on again as Federline needs some headgear and NOW we’re ready to go.

Federline’s headlock is broken as quickly as you would expect so there go the gloves. Hang on again though as Federline has an idea: let’s make this a Masterlock Challenge! Cena has a seat in the chair but Federline changes his mind. Instead it’s a test of strength….with Federline pulling him into a cross armbreaker of all things. That’s countered into a powerbomb but Nitro comes in, allowing Federline to hit a low blow. Cue Umaga and Armando Alejandro Estrada to beat Cena down, including a belt shot, to give Federline the cocky pin.

Rating: C. Yeah this was completely fine and nothing unexpected. Federline did a bunch of the classic hits here and that is all it needed to be. This was MUCH better than having Federline try to work a match and it added some heat to Sunday’s title match. There was no need to try anything more complicated and this could have been much, much worse.

Post break, Maria tries to talk to Federline but Melina isn’t having any of that. Melina isn’t having any of that because Maria called him K-Fed. Instead they can have a match later, but Melina gives her a slap for a preview.

DX talks strategy in the back, I’m guessing for a chess tournament.

We go to Kevin Federline’s celebration, complete with Johnny Nitro, Melina and a bunch of women. Coach comes in to make a four on one handicap match with John Cena facing Armando Alejandro Estrada, Umaga, Nitro and….Coach himself. Of note: Coach reminds us that Nitro has an Intercontinental Title shot at the pay per view, which has been mostly forgotten since the match was announced.

Some members of the Miami Heat, including Shaquille O’Neal, are here.

Cryme Tyme/Highlanders vs. Shelton Benjamin/Charlie Haas/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Cryme Tyme says hi to Shaq during the entrances. Cade charges into Rory’s elbow in the corner to start so JTG comes in to dance around a bit. That earns him a kick to the ribs and Haas comes in for a butterfly suplex. Benjamin and Murdoch don’t seem to be on the same page so Cade drops a leg instead. A missed middle rope elbow gives JTG a breather and the hot tag brings in Shad to slug away. Shad’s belly to back suplex gets two and everything breaks down. A jawbreaker sends Murdoch into the ropes with JTG snapping the back of his neck over the top for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but Cryme Tyme getting another pin is a good idea. Above all else, the tag team division needs some fresh teams and Cryme Tyme has been built up rather well. The rest of the teams are just kind of there, though Haas and Benjamin should take all of eighteen seconds to reheat if needed.

Wrestlemania Recall: the biggest match in the history of professional wrestling.

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Conway

Non-title. Before the match, Conway says that he is sick of losing around here and if he loses again, he’s done with Raw. Conway then loses in about 20 seconds to a sunset flip in his last televised match in WWE.

Post match Conway is still in the ring and here is Vince McMahon for a chat. Vince talks about how many people break their New Year’s resolution, just like Conway already did. He isn’t breaking his though, which includes not being nice and letting people take advantage of him. That means he isn’t going to be like his good friend Donald Trump, who is having trouble with Rosie O’Donnell, who he refers to as Yokozuna. Speaking of Trump, Vince doesn’t like him stealing his catchphrase, so Conway is FIRED.

Kenny Dykstra says Ric Flair offering a handshake wasn’t about Flair, but about himself. They say deaths come in threes, but tonight he’s going to make it four: James Brown, Gerald Ford, Saddaam Hussein and Ric Flair’s career.

We look at Rated-RKO attacking Ric Flair a few weeks ago, leading to DX wanting revenge. Then Rated-RKO destroyed DX on the last Raw of the year.

Here is DX for a chat and they seem rather chipper despite being taken out two weeks ago. Shawn says he can’t pretend what he just saw didn’t happen but they are out of competition. They have beaten a bunch of people who are either gone or jerking the curtain somewhere else. Now they have Rated-RKO show up and finally you have two guys who have a set. Then they took out Ric Flair and beat him within an inch of his life. They one upped themselves by laying out DX, which is someone no one has ever done before.

That’s why the violence is coming at New Year’s Revolution. HHH says Rated-RKO thinks they have them in the palm of their hands, but remember when Vince McMahon thought that? It’s because DX is like…..Frosted Mini Wheats? They have two sides: the sweet and sugary side (Shawn: “I like the sugary side!”) and the other side, who is going to make Rated-RKO bleed. This was some weird mix of goofy and serious and it only kind of worked.

Melina vs. Maria

Melina is in workout gear for some reason and Victoria comes out for commentary. Maria knocks her into the corner to start and hammers away as the catfight is on. Victoria rants on the lack of spots because of people like Mickie James as Melina snaps Maria’s neck across the top. Maria gets a boot up in the corner and hammers away as Victoria wants her to just go back to the beach already. A rollup goes badly for Melina so she stacks Maria up (with nothing in between) for the pin.

Post match Victoria goes after Lilian Garcia but Mickie James runs out for the save.

Video on Tribute to the Troops, set to a Goo Goo Dolls song.

Ric Flair/Carlito vs. Kenny Dykstra/Chris Masters

Torrie Wilson is here with the good ones. JR: “Now Kenny has a last name. And a hometown!” Masters tags Kenny in rather than facing Carlito (the hair is frightening) but comes in after Kenny takes him down. It’s quickly off to Flair for a chop block to Masters but Kenny breaks up the Figure Four in a hurry. We take a break and come back with Masters taking Carlito into the corner and Kenny grabbing the chinlock. It’s back to Masters for some chops in the corner and a chinlock of his own.

There’s a gorilla press for two but Carlito is back up with a springboard elbow to the face. Kenny is smart enough to go outside and knock Flair off the apron, leaving Carlito to get Masterlocked. Flair comes back in for the save as everything breaks down. The hot tag brings Flair back in to chop away but Masters clotheslines him down. Carlito and Masters fight to the floor as Kenny sends Flair into the buckle and grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty basic match here, though the ending didn’t exactly do much for anyone. Above all else, it continues the Kenny push and it is only working so well. The fact that JR is mocking him for getting a last name and a hometown should tell you everything there is to know about his development. Kenny needed to go away for a long time to get rid of the Spirit Squad aura, but this isn’t a complete disaster yet.

Post match Flair says this isn’t over but here is Rated-RKO to take Flair out, including another Conchairto. I’m guessing DX stepped out for stroganoff. Flair is checked on, and after a break, he is still being checked on.

New Year’s Revolution rundown, including Kenny vs. Flair and Carlito vs. Masters.

Here’s Kevin Federline to say he told us so. He shocked the world earlier and it was so fun that he is going to have a seat at ringside. John Cena can’t see him.

John Cena vs. Armando Alejandro Estrada/Umaga/Jonathan Coachman/Johnny Nitro

Kevin Federline is on commentary. Cena charges in to slug it out with Umaga and low bridges the monster to the floor. Nitro comes in to hammer away but gets release fisherman’s suplexed. Umaga is back in for a Samoan drop and Coach gets in a few shots. That triggers the comeback so Cena cleans house, including getting Umaga in the STFU. Estrada brings in a chair but Cena takes it away and hits Umaga in the head for the DQ.

Post match Cena cleans house and grabs Federline for the FU. A lot of posing and staring ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Not much of a show here, but it felt like they were scrambling to get through the show while also focusing on the Federline stuff (which went shockingly well). New Year’s Revolution feels like something that is just there too, with stuff like the Intercontinental Title match barely being mentioned. Cena vs. Umaga and DX vs. Rated-RKO should be enough to carry the show, but it wasn’t exactly a great commercial for the pay per view.

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Tribute To The Troops 2006
Date: December 25, 2006
Location: Camp Victory, Baghdad, Iraq
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for a pretty cool tradition as this is the annual Tribute To The Troops show. This time around they are over in Iraq for a show where the wrestling does not mean a thing and we get to see a bunch of wrestlers and celebrities talk about how great the military is. This may or may not be your cup of beverage but let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the USO and others helping to entertaining the troops. Tonight, WWE will be doing exactly the same.

John Cena vs. Edge

Non-title. Cena takes him down with a headlock takeover but Edge gets to his feet and takes it into the corner. That earns him a hiptoss and slam for two but Cena misses a charge and walks into a DDT. Some right hands in the corner keep Cena in trouble until he gets dropped face first onto the top turnbuckle. A clothesline cuts Cena off again and he heads to the apron, meaning it’s time for a slugout. Cena gets knocked off the top and out to the floor, setting up the baseball slide as we take a break.

Back with Edge working on a bodyscissors to stay on the ribs but Cena fights up. The Throwback drops Edge again and it’s time for a double breather. There’s a big boot to give Edge two but he takes too much time grabbing a chair, allowing Cena to get two off a rollup. A spinwheel kick sets up a quickly broken camel clutch on Cena, who starts the expected comeback. The FU is countered into the Impaler though and Edge goes up top….where he gets caught by Cena, only to counter into an electric chair to put Cena down again. The spear hits corner though and the FU finishes Edge.

Rating: C+. Pretty much a house show main event here, which these two have had probably a hundred times by now. Granted this isn’t a show where the wrestling itself is going to matter whatsoever. You aren’t going to have the All American Boy losing here though and it isn’t like anyone losing to Cena is hurt whatsoever. Is there a reason they didn’t make this a title match though?

A General gave a nice speech about WWE and giving the soldiers some Americana.

Video on wrestlers interacting with troops.

CM Punk and Shelton Benjamin wish the troops and their families a happy holidays.

CM Punk vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton jumps him to start but the threat of a right hand sends him outside as we get some credits for the military people who helped air the show. Back in and Punk is sent shoulder first into the post, setting up a rather logical shoulder breaker. Punk fights out of an armbar but a hair pull puts him right back down. That means a second armbar for Punk to fight out of, setting up some kicks into a bulldog. A military helicopter flies by as Shelton jumps the corner to grab a superplex for two. The Stinger Splash misses though and Punk grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. Much quicker match here and it worked well enough. Punk winning by fluke is the right way to go as he isn’t ready for a dominant win over Benjamin, but you can see that WWE has some plans for him. Good enough match here with the arm work and Punk won, meaning there isn’t much to complain about.

Some troops say hi and one gets pinned.

Johnny Nitro vs. Undertaker

Melina is here too and this could be interesting. Undertaker’s entrance doesn’t work as well in the light, but the lack of hat and coat is understandable in the desert. Nitro dodges around to start and gets in a few right hands in the corner. That earns him a quick toss into the same corner and some much bigger right hands as the dominance begins. Undertaker starts cranking on the arm and Old School connects. Nitro slips out of the Last Ride though and hits an enziguri but Undertaker clotheslines him down. Snake Eyes into the big boot sets up the chokeslam and it’s a Tombstone for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Another short and to the point match here with Undertaker’s appearance alone giving the soldiers a thrill. I believe this is the only singles match that these two would ever have, which is kind of surprising as you would think they might have met each other down the line at some point. Still though, just a quick near squash here and for a show like this, that’s the right idea.

Undertaker poses for a good while.

Earlier today, Lilian Garcia sang the National Anthem, which as usual, is great.

Wrestlers and troops say seasons greetings.

Video on wrestlers interacting with troops and doing military things when mortar attacks went off. Everyone had to go and take cover, which is quite the moment.Fourteen soldiers were injured.

Bobby Lashley vs. Hardcore Holly

Non-title. Lashley drives him into the corner to start and busts out the gorilla press, which always looks good. A shoulder puts Holly down again and a snap suplex gets two. There’s the delayed vertical suplex for the same and they go outside, where Holly sends him hard into the steps. Back in and Holly sends the shoulder into the post, setting up the armbar. Lashley fights up and slaps on a torture rack, which he drops down into a backbreaker for another two. Holly gets in his own suplex but Lashley grabs a running powerslam for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another short and to the point match here with Lashley, the ex-military guy, getting to look pretty dominant in the win. Lashley is the next big thing in ECW and it is making him feel like a much bigger deal, even if he is stuck beating up people like Holly and Test every so often.

An Iraqi Army captain explains some of what the two militaries are doing.

Wrestlers meet troops and do stuff.

Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title. Hardy hammers away to start but gets knocked down without much effort. The sitdown splash misses though and they head outside with Umaga sending him into the post. Another ram into the barricade keeps Hardy in trouble and they head back inside for a kick to the spine. The nerve hold goes on to keep Hardy down but Umaga’s top rope splash misses. Hardy is back up with the Whisper in the Wind for two and there’s the Twist of Fate. The Swanton only hits knees though and Umaga unloads in the corner. The running hip attack sets up the Samoan Spike to put Hardy away.

Rating: C. Ok then. I’m not sure what the point was in having the champion lose here but again, it isn’t like it matters. Umaga is on a roll at this point and we are going to be getting a heck of a showdown with Cena at the pay per view. Going over Hardy makes Umaga look good, though it is kind of weird to see a champion getting mostly squashed.

The Director of Armed Forces Entertainment gives a lieutenant the 2.6 millionth letter the military has received.

Carlito vs. Randy Orton

Carlito’s headlock doesn’t last long to start so he goes with the left hands in the corner instead. An armdrag sets up an armbar but Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick. A swinging side slam gives Orton two and we hit the chinlock. Carlito fights up for the slugout and the springboard elbow to the face gets two. The RKO is countered into the Backstabber but Orton grabs the ropes to save himself. A rollup with feet on the ropes gets two so Carlito rolls him up and grabs the trunks for the pin.

Rating: C-. They couldn’t have had Carlito lose to Umaga and have Hardy win here? Anyway, Carlito continues to not be the most inspiring guy and having him beat Orton feels a bit out of place. The fans seemed to like the cheating win at the end though and it’s nice to give the soldiers something to cheer.

Santa meets some of the women, who have been naughty this year.

Some troops worked in one of Saddam Hussein’s palaces.

And now, JBL Claus (pull your beard up man). Santa talks about how great the troops are and brings out Krystal, Maria and Torrie to meet some troops. Santa: “Does Santa Claus rock or what?” We get some jokes about how the women look and then Santa has them throw out some gifts. This goes on for a good bit until Chris Masters comes out to interrupt.

Masters says he hates Christmas and doesn’t believe in Santa Claus. He doesn’t like the way the troops drool over Santa’s helpers, so let’s have a Masterlock Challenge for one of the troops. Well hang on a second, as first he is challenging Santa to the Masterlock Challenge. The hold goes on and JR thinks Rudolph needs to make a save. Santa is out and Masters wins, saying there is no Christmas (because Masters doesn’t get that Santa has already done his work for the year).

Masters looks for a soldier to take the challenge and picks one of the smallest around. The Masterlock goes on again and this time JBL comes in to break kick Masters in the back….which is enough to break the hold and the soldier wins. JBL and the women say Merry Christmas to wrap it up.

One more long video on the trip ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I never know how to rate a show like this but this is the very basic version compared to what the show would become. What we got here was good enough though as the wrestling was fine enough and it still felt special. Above all else, the idea of going over to Iraq makes the show come off as important. WWE putting in some effort is nice and this worked out rather well for a Christmas night special.

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Main Event
Date: May 6, 2021
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

Things are starting to pick up around here a little bit, as we have had an angle and a much higher profile match over the last few weeks. Last week saw Ricochet face Mustafa Ali, which is not the kind of match that you get to see around here very often. Now we get to see where things go from here, which will likely be right back to normal. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Ricochet vs. Mustafa Ali

Ok so it’s still going for another week. Ricochet dropkicks him down at the bell and hits a flying forearm, allowing him to hammer away. A kick to the face knocks Ali out of the corner and a springboard clothesline gives Ricochet two. Ali flapjacks him out of the corner for a breather though and the sneering is strong as he shouts that Ricochet can’t beat him.

Ricochet kicks away from a half crab attempt but gets caught in it a few seconds later. That’s broken up with a rope grab and Ricochet goes up top for a shooting star press crossbody, because of course he does. A kick to the chest and a clothesline drop Ali, followed by a dragon suplex for two. Ali hits the knee again and grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes (ala how he won last week) but Ricochet reverses into a rollup of his own for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: C+. It’s almost hard to imagine a story being told with Main Event matches yet here we are, mainly due to how good these people can be in the ring. For the life of me I don’t get how they aren’t more prominently featured on one of the major shows, or just as a tag team who can bring some energy to the shows. Either way, it’s a nice little boost for Main Event, even if I have no reason to believe it lasts.

We recap Daniel Bryan pushing for Cesaro to get a Universal Title shot but ultimately getting one himself.

From Smackdown.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and some rather epic new music, is defending. Bryan dropkicks him into the corner to start and fires off the kicks but Reigns drops him with a single shot. A headlock is countered into a failed YES Lock attempt with Reigns bailing to the floor. That means a dropkick through the ropes into a running knee from the apron as we take a break. Back with Reigns turning him inside out off of a clothesline and grabbing a snap suplex.

The chinlock goes on to keep Bryan in trouble, followed by a right hand to the head to put Bryan down again. Bryan fights back with some kicks and puts Reigns on top, but the super hurricanrana is countered into a superbomb for two as we take a break. Back again with Reigns firing off some knees in the corner. Bryan gets in a shot of his own and puts Reigns on top for a belly to back superplex.

The cover is delayed so Reigns gets out, meaning they’re both down again for a bit. Bryan is up first and gets smart by kicking at the arm a bit more, followed by some snaps over his shoulder. Reigns misses a charge and falls to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. That’s pulled out of the air and Reigns snaps off a belly to belly. The spear only hits barricade though and we take another break.

Back again with Bryan hitting the Swan Dive for two but Reigns hits the Superman Punch for the same. The running knee connects but Reigns gets a foot on the rope. Bryan slaps on the YES Lock, which is quickly reversed into a cradle for the break. Reigns hits the spear for a near fall and Reigns is stunned. The guillotine can’t go on in full as Bryan reverses into the YES Lock again but Reigns powers out. The heavy forearms knock Bryan silly and a heck of a powerbomb plants him again. Reigns goes to pick him up and puts on the guillotine, this time with the healthy arm and Bryan is out at 27:18.

Rating: A-. This was just a step behind their Fastlane classic and that’s more than great on a free TV match. There is something great about Bryan using the technical abilities to cut Reigns down but Reigns kept coming back with straight power. Then Reigns switched to the intelligence by switching to the good arm for the win and that was just too much. Awesome match here, and one of the better TV matches in recent memory. Also: McAfee was outstanding here and sounded like the best and most polished WWE broadcaster in a very long time. He really is awesome at this and I’m impressed.

Post match Reigns grabs some chairs but here is Cesaro for the save. Cesaro knocks Reigns to the floor but Jey Uso jumps him from behind. Uso ties Cesaro in the ropes and Reigns gives Bryan the Conchairto to end the show.

From Raw.

Eva Marie, now with slightly pink hair, is back. She is laying on a car and asking if she has out attention now. Eva says she wants to make things better and be in a place that challenges her, so the Eva-Lution has begun.

From Raw.

Cue Sonya Deville, who, after a break, is in the ring as Charlotte talks about how glad she is to be back. However, she needs to be added to the Wrestlemania Backlash title match because she is a big star. Putting her in the title match is going to make it a bigger deal because she is a big deal. She is an influencer and whether you love her or hate her, the division needs her. Charlotte tells Sonya to be fair to Flair, which is enough to get Sonya to add her to the title match.

Cue Rhea Ripley to say this is nonsense and Charlotte shouldn’t be in the title match again for the obvious reason: nobody likes her. Ripley and Asuka have a purpose in the match, but adding Charlotte is unfair. Cue Asuka to say she’s ready for both of the. Charlotte promises to win the title but Ripley gets in Sonya’s face. Charlotte jumps Ripley from behind and the fight is on with Asuka clearing the ring. I don’t think there was any doubt that Charlotte was going to be added, though it almost feels like trolling the fans.

Backlash rundown.

From Smackdown.

Aleister Black talks about people looking at him and judging him because this is the nature of man. We go to the animation again, with Black talking about walking the halls in high school and having everyone think something about him. People cared about building their own lives on a foundation of lies. Imagine thinking that is real or falling for that. His father never fed him those dreams, because the truth is that there is something horribly wrong with all of that and all of you. He could give us the keys, but he won’t. The animation is a different way to go and these are intriguing so far.

Jeff Hardy vs. Jinder Mahal

This is Mahal’s return for the first time in nearly a year and has Veer and Shanky, formerly known as Indus Sher, with him. Hardy charges at him in the corner and hammers away before firing off shoulders in the corner. Mahal gets in a shot to the back and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Mahal dumps him over the top for the big crash and we take a break before Veer and Shanky can maul him.

We come back with Mahal stomping away even more, followed by some shoulders to the ribs. A suplex gives Mahal two and we hit the abdominal stretch. Jeff jawbreaks his way to freedom and forearms him down, setting up the basement dropkick for two. Mahal avoids a charge in the corner though and hits a jumping knee to the face. The Khallas finishes Hardy at 9:18.

Rating: C-. Yep, this was a Jinder Mahal match and it’s the same thing it always was: the same boring, basic match, with Mahal being in great shape and not being able to do anything memorable whatsoever. I’m sure he’ll get some big push and will likely have a feud with Drew McIntyre, as fans continue to not be overly interested in the most generic heel wrestling imaginable.

Video on the Backlash triple threat match for the Raw World Title.

From Raw.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Non-title and MVP is here too. Lashley’s running shoulder to start just annoys Strowman so he clotheslines Lashley outside instead. Back in and Lashley runs Strowman over with his own clothesline but Strowman is right back up….as Drew McIntyre comes out. The distraction lets Lashley take Strowman down again, allowing him to tease an alliance with McIntyre as we take a break. Back with McIntyre on commentary and Lashley choking on the rope.

Lashley keeps hammering away and hitting a running right hand in the corner as commentary brings up Drew McIntyre taking promo classes back in the day. Strowman is back with an electric chair to Lashley (whose eyes bug out when he goes up) but he slips out of the running powerslam. The Hurt Lock is blocked and Strowman hits a sidewalk slam. They head outside with the Strowman Express hitting McIntyre by mistake. McIntyre gets up on the apron and the distraction lets Lashley hit the spear for the pin at 13:12.

Rating: D+. Good night I’m bored with this feud. It’s just three people attacking each other over and over again on Raw, leading up to them all hitting each other at once (and I bet it doesn’t even turn into a paining as Eye of the Tiger starts playing). This three way feud has been so dull and lifeless and it needs to wrap up already. Next week is likely going to be McIntyre vs. Lashley because that’s the most obvious and easy thing that WWE could do, which is why I fully expect it.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure how to handle the idea of Main Event being treated like a (very minor) place where things happen. It was the kind of show that doesn’t mean very much but if we get to use it as a tryout for new things, I’ll accept it as the televised, one off version of a house show. The show still isn’t good, but at least it is moderately more interesting and that’s an upgrade.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 11, 2006
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting close to the end of the year and that means it’s time for a new year. That would be New Year’s Revolution and we are starting to see the card coming together. In this case, that means we need to move forward towards John Cena defending the Raw World Title against Umaga and whatever else is added. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

John Cena vs. Armando Alejandro Estrada

Non-title. Before the match, Estrada says he knows no one here wants to see this match (Lawler disagrees) so we should just call it off. Estrada even offers a box of Cuban cigars to let him out of the match but Cena snaps one of them in half. Estrada: “That’s ok. Smoking’s bad!” How about Estrada’s diamond watch? JR thinks it’s out of the Uncle Elmer collection, and Cena snapping it in half might be proof. With that not working, Estrada busts out some cash and points out that we’re in a casino.

Cena takes said money and throws it into the crowd, meaning the match is still on. The destruction begins early with Cena knocking him around and easily blocking a brass knuckles shot. Estrada’s shirt is ripped open for the loud chops and Cena goes old school for the right hands to the head. The FU, with a smile, finishes in a hurry.

Post match Cena puts on the STFU but Johnny Nitro runs in for the save. Melina comes out as Nitro reminds Cena that he is training Kevin Federline for the Cena showdown on New Year’s Day.

Post break, Cena challenges Nitro for later tonight so Kevin Federline can get a preview.

Carlito/Jerry Lawler vs. Viscera/Chris Masters

This sounds like someone hit the random button on Smackdown vs. Raw. Lawler and Masters get things going with Masters hitting a quick slam. That makes Lawler think twice about things but Masters takes him into the corner for the tag off to Viscera anyway. The missed charge lets Lawler….get shoved by Masters so Viscera can hammer away against the ropes. Viscera drops the big elbow for two and we hit the chinlock, followed by the sitout chokebomb (that’s a big bump for Lawler) for two more.

Masters comes in and takes some forearms to the chest but spends too much time posing, allowing Lawler to get two off a sunset flip. It’s off to Carlito to pick up the pace, including dropkicking Masters down. Viscera cuts him off with a heck of a sidewalk slam but Lawler is back in with the right hands. The splash crushes Lawler in the corner but Carlito slips out of the Masterlock attempt and rolls Viscera up for the pin.

Rating: C-. I can’t believe it but this worked out pretty well. Lawler was working hard in there and Viscera was fine in the monster roll. Leaving Carlito and Masters out of the mix for the most part was probably a good idea, which makes things all the weirder. Lawler continues to be better at this stuff than a lot of people might expect and it worked out well here.

Cryme Tyme played the Highlanders in some Three Card Monte earlier today. The Highlanders get hustled, as you might have expected. Charlie Haas comes in (I didn’t expect that) to say this is perpetuating stereotypes so JTG says they’ll try to make this a more appropriate environment. Shelton Benjamin comes in and doesn’t seem pleased, meaning tonight, the World’s Greatest Tag Team is back. Haas: “HE SAID THE WORLD’S GREATEST TAG TEAM IS BACK! DY-NO-MITE! FOR SHIZZLE!” Haas and Benjamin leave, with Rory saying he didn’t know Haas was black.

We look back at Kenny helping Rated-RKO win a match but get beaten down by DX after the match.

Kenny comes in to see Rated-RKO, who doesn’t like him taking credit for the win. Orton: “As quick as you can say Spirit Squad, you got superkicked and Pedigreed.” Edge tells Kenny to watch him beat HHH tonight.

Next week: a special three hour Raw, featuring a thirty man battle royal with the winner facing John Cena for the World Title the same night.

Highlanders vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Haas works on Rory’s arm to start but gets taken into the corner for a top rope ax handle from Robbie. An overhead belly to belly sends Robbie flying and Shelton adds a suplex of his own. There’s a slam onto Haas’ knee but Robbie manages a Russian legsweep, allowing the hot tag off to Rory. Everything breaks down and Shelton kicks Robbie outside. Shelton jumps over Haas to land on the hanging Rory’s back, setting up a rollup with trunks for the pin.

Rating: D+. It isn’t like there are many teams that much better than Haas and Benjamin at the moment so the match result is hardly some horrible decision. The Highlanders stopped mattering a long time ago, even after the boost from Roddy Piper. Getting Haas and Benjamin back to doing something is fine, and this worked for a return.

This Week In Wrestling History: AWA SuperClash III, with a focus on Von Erich vs. Lawler and that horrible finish. Why yes, there is an AWA DVD coming out soon.

Edge vs. HHH

No seconds here, at least to start. HHH goes straight to the brawling and takes it outside to send Edge into the announcers’ table. Back in and the jumping knee to the face sends Edge outside again, followed by an elbow to do it again. HHH follows but here’s Randy Orton for the DQ.

Post match the brawl is on until Shawn Michaels, Kenny and Ric Flair run in for the subsequent saves. Cue Coach for the six man announcement.

DX/Ric Flair vs. Rated-RKO/Kenny

We’re joined in progress with Flair chopping Kenny into the corner so HHH can come in for a delayed suplex. There’s the knee drop as Lawler gets in a South Park reference. Shawn comes in to use Kenny’s headband for a choke, because veterans can cheap and be charming. HHH adds a chop block so it’s off to Edge, who gets taken down by the leg as well. That’s enough for Orton to come in and break up the Figure Four, meaning it’s time to hammer on Flair.

The villains start taking turns on Flair, with Edge forearming him down in the corner to cut off a comeback bid. An elbow to the head gets two on Edge and the armbar goes on. With that dropped, Flair chops him out of the air and hands it off to Shawn to start picking up the pace. Shawn superkicks Edge but walks into the RKO from Orton to put them both down.

We take a break and come back with Shawn and Orton striking it out until Shawn grabs a swinging neckbreaker. Edge comes in but misses the high crossbody, meaning HHH can come in to really clean house. It’s quickly back to Flair for the Figure Four but everything breaks down again. Kenny tries his own Figure Four but Flair small packages him for the pin.

Rating: C+. This did what it needed to do, including letting Flair come back and get a win to put him back on the right track. There wasn’t much to the wrestling but it told a nice enough story. Also, having Kenny in there to take falls should help Edge and Orton from taking all of the falls.

Post match the good guys celebrate but Edge and Randy Orton come back in to clean house. The Conchairto is loaded up but HHH makes the save with the sledgehammer, including using it to knock a chair out of Edge’s hands in a cool visual.

Johnny Nitro and Melina are on the phone with Kevin Federline, who remind him that they are going to take care of John Cena tonight (along with reminding him of who they are). Coach comes in and says hi but Federline doesn’t know who Coach is. With that out of the way, Coach announces that Nitro is going to challenge Jeff Hardy for the Intercontinental Title at New Year’s Revolution in a cage. Melina looks nervous here and they all walk off, leaving Ron Simmons to come in for the catchphrase while Federline is stillon the phone.

Torrie Wilson is freaked out about facing Victoria because she is on the hit list. Carlito calms her down, partially with his lips.

Victoria vs. Torrie Wilson

Torrie looks terrified and gets kicked down without much effort to start. There’s a catapult to send Torrie throat first into the bottom rope and Victoria bites off one of Torrie’s fingernails. Torrie grabs a rollup for two, earning herself the Widow’s Peak for the fast pin.

Post match Victoria checks Torrie off the list. Cue Chris Masters to hit the ring with the Masterlock on Torrie. Carlito makes the fast save and staring ensues.

Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title, Armando Alejandro Estrada isn’t here and Hardy gets shoved down in a hurry. The sunset flip is blocked but Umaga misses the sitdown splash. That lets Hardy hit a slingshot splash for two and the Whisper in the Wind sends us to a break. Back with Jeff kicking away at Umaga from the apron until Umaga pulls him down. They head back inside for the nerve hold, followed by….another nerve hold.

Hardy fights up so Umaga blasts him with a running clothesline for another knockdown. Umaga misses a top rope splash though and Hardy has a chance. The Swanton connects for two with the kickout launching Hardy. Umaga ties him in the Tree of Woe for the running headbutt. Back to back running hip attacks knock Hardy cold and the referee stops it.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty clever way to give Umaga a win without taking the title off of Hardy or having him get pinned. Umaga as being even more of a monster without Estrada around was a little more interesting and they are making the idea of Cena going after the monster more appealing. Nice storytelling here and it helped make the title match that much better.

Post match Umaga hits another hip attack and Samoan Spikes Hardy and the referee. So why would Estrada be at ringside for the Cena match?

John Cena vs. Johnny Nitro

Non-title and Melina is here with Nitro. Cena charges straight in and starts the fight early, including an elbow to the jaw. An even harder clothesline takes Nitro’s head off as JR is going on a rather long rant about respect. Nitro gets knocked outside as we hear about Cena being a huge wrestling fan as a kid. Lawler comments by talking about how Melina has some magnificent Muracos.

Melina pulls Nitro outside so Cena glares at her and clotheslines Nitro again. A legsweep lets Nitro put his feet on the ropes for one, followed by a dropkick to finally put Cena on the floor for a change. With Melina hitting a rather long scream, Nitro sends him into the steps for two and Melina yells even more. A neckbreaker gives Nitro two and he low bridges Cena outside to make it worse.

Back in and Cena wins the slugout, only to get poked in the eye. We hit the sleeper so Cena drops backwards for the crash break. Nitro puts it on again but Cena fights up to power out of it again. A belly to back faceplant gives Nitro two and the corkscrew moonsault connects, even if it almost wound up looking like a Swanton to the knee. Cena fights back up and initiates the finishing sequence, capped off by the FU for the pin. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C. I’m curious if that landing knocked Nitro a little silly and they went to the finish in a hurry as a result. The landing looked awful as Nitro almost landed on his own head so there wasn’t much room for error. Cena winning isn’t going to hurt Nitro, as he and Hardy can have a rather good match under any circumstances. Good enough main event here.

Overall Rating: C+. This show had the focus that they have been needing to get ready for the pay per view. Between the main event guys looking unstoppable and the other matches getting some attention of their own, I’m wanting to see the pay per view that much more. They still need to add a few more things, but we can cover that on next week’s special show. This week had its own tasks though and for once, WWE took care of them and more.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 10, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Adnan Virk, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania Backlash and that means it is time to push the rest of the card forward in a big way. There are currently two Raw matches set for the pay per view so in theory we are going to need some more stuff announced tonight. You can probably guess those matches from here and now we get to see how dull they can make the show that announces them. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Bobby Lashley beating Braun Strowman and then getting Claymored by Drew McIntyre. As a result: Lashley vs. McIntyre this week.

Opening sequence.

Charlotte/Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke/Asuka

Jax powers Mandy into the corner to start so Baszler can choke with the boot. Baszler grabs a standing armbar and takes Rose down without much effort. Asuka comes in and dropkicks Baszler down, with Mandy and Dana dropkicking Shayna and Nia to the floor. After Reginald backflips off the apron…..here is Alexa Bliss on her swing with Lily next to her.

Bliss is here to watch someone and we take a break. Back with Charlotte holding Rose in the Figure Four necklock and then Jax coming in to power her around even more. Rose slips over and makes the hot tag off to Brooke, who gets to clean a bit of the house. Baszler backbreakers her down….and then her knee gives out. It starts shaking and Baszler kind of collapses, allowing the legal Asuka to come in with the Shining Wizard for the pin at 8:40.

Rating: D. Oh boy we could be in for a long night. So the evil doll is now using magical powers to go after Baszler’s leg? Does this count as another story for Nia Jax? Anyway, this is not exactly looking like a great night and the fact that Rhea Ripley was barely mentioned here does not exactly give me hope. It was a bad match and the ending was even worse, which isn’t even that much of a surprise.

Post match Charlotte drops Asuka as Alexa laughs a lot.

Riddle scooters up to New Day in the back and talks about how RKBro is in the process of registering to be an official team. That’s better than AJ Styles and Omos, who aren’t even a real team. Randy Orton comes up and the three of them talk about how great it was when Orton got hit with tomatoes. Orton doesn’t seem to agree but finds the idea of ending careers and kicking people in the head funny. Violence is promised for later.

MVP comes in to see Braun Strowman, who tells him to get out. Strowman isn’t interested in talking business but MVP says that Bobby Lashley would rather lose the WWE Title to Strowman instead of Drew McIntyre (not that he’s losing of course). Tonight, if McIntyre would happen to get hurt, that would leave us with Lashley vs. Strowman on Sunday, with no McIntyre to interfere. Strowman doesn’t like MVP, but seems interested.

We recap Damian Priest beating John Morrison last week thanks to some botched Miz interference. Priest vs. Miz is set for Wrestlemania Backlash.

Priest is in Adam Pearce’s office when Miz and Morrison come in. Morrison seems to blame Miz for the loss last week so a deal is offered: the winner of Priest vs. Morrison tonight gets to pick the stipulation for Miz vs. Priest. Miz doesn’t seem happy, but Morrison knows tonight calls for a light shower of Johnny Drip Drip.

Jinder Mahal is back with Veer and Shanky (formerly Indus Sher in NXT) and is ready to get back on the throne.

Jinder Mahal vs. Jeff Hardy

Rematch from last week’s Main Event of all things and Veer and Shanky are with Mahal. Hardy gets taken down and stomped a lot to start before a suplex puts him down again. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Hardy fights up and hits his spinning mule kick to escape. A middle rope ax handle connects and Jeff gets to take his shirt off but the Twist of Fate is countered into a jumping knee to the face. The Khallas finishes Hardy at 3:25.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s still Mahal. He has a good look and the eyes look crazy intense but it’s the same boring person who is still one of the all time worst WWE champions. I understand why WWE insists on pushing him but throwing him out there with a pair of lackeys isn’t going to be the big saving grace for his career. Mahal is technically fine, but he’s so uninteresting.

Charlotte, who changed clothes in a hurry, comes in to see Sonya Deville.

Elias and Jaxson Ryker have tomatoes (yes, really) but AJ Styles and Omos come up to ask why they’re doing this. Elias loads up a song but AJ says we’re just going to be more serious. Omos crushes a tomato to prove his point.

RKBro/New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos/Elias/Jaxson Ryker

Riddle tries an armbar on Elias to start but the rope break is good for an early save. Ryker comes in and gets kicked down by Riddle, which just seems to fire Ryker up even more. Omos tags himself in so Riddle goes after him, only to be shoved down in a hurry. A kick to the ribs is flipped away so Kofi comes in, only to get headbutted down. Orton comes in to try his luck and then rolls outside in a smart move as we take a break.

Back with Riddle getting knocked into the wrong corner for a stomping. Elias elbows him down and Ryker drops an elbow for two. Riddle fights up and gets over to Kofi to pick up the pace, with Woods coming in a few seconds later. Kofi tags himself back in for a high crossbody for two on AJ and it’s already back to Woods. AJ takes him down and hands it back to Ryker to hammer away in the corner. The chinlock doesn’t last long but Ryker plants him with a spinebuster for two.

Elias’ swinging suplex gets two and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Woods’ back. Woods fights out of that just like it’s a chinlock and the hot tag brings in Riddle to clean house. Omos makes a fast save and knocks Riddle out of the air with most of a right hand. Woods dropkicks AJ through the rope and New Day grabs an AJ leg each to run in a circle. Back in and Orton hits the RKO to finish Elias at 14:08.

Rating: C-. That is pretty easily the best thing on the show and it wasn’t really that good in the first place. Too much Ryker and Elias here, though Omos continues to look like a monster. Having Orton be scared of him meant more to him than anything he has done to New Day so they are doing things right with him. Not a good match, but it was an upgrade after the horrible first forty minutes or so.

Post match Orton hits the RKO on Kofi and Woods as Riddle isn’t pleased.

Rhea Ripley (hey she’s on the show) comes in to Sonya Deville’s office and gets in a showdown with Asuka. Tonight, they are going to have a match, which Ripley doesn’t seem to like. She saw Charlotte come in here earlier and she knows what that means. Asuka says she has already had a match but she is ready for Ripley anyway. Ripley says game on.

MVP doesn’t like the idea of Bobby Lashley having to beat Drew McIntyre again because it is like a sequel with a foregone conclusion. Lashley promises to win tonight and MVP won’t have any discussion over ongoing negotiations with Braun Strowman.

Sheamus vs. Humberto Carrillo

Non-title. Before the match, Sheamus talks about needing to prove his greatness with the Open Challenge, even if it means someone like Adnan Virk, who is way over his head on commentary, gets a shot. Tonight, Carrillo isn’t getting a title shot but he is getting a Brogue Kick to the face. Sheamus forearms him in the back to start but Humberto gets in a kick to the face. A dropkick puts Sheamus on the floor, where he catches a baseball slide and sends Carrillo into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus hitting the forearms to the chest and grabbing a reverse chinlock. An Alabama Slam gets two on Carrillo so Sheamus takes him up top, only to get pulled down with a super hurricanrana. A sunset bomb to the floor connects, even though Sheamus lands on Carrillo’s knee. It’s actually too much and the referee calls it off at 9:10….with Sheamus winning, despite being down too.

Rating: C-. The ending really took away from this one but all that matters is if Carrillo is ok. That was a nasty landing and you could tell that something was wrong in a hurry. Hopefully everything is ok, as I’m not sure where things are going to go otherwise. Assuming Carrillo can do it, I could see this one getting a rematch on Sunday, though I’m curious to see where Mansoor fits into this, assuming he does.

Video on Lucha House Party. They’re Lucha Lit.

Eva Marie wants to prove herself so she is back where it all began. Coming soon.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Cedric Alexander

Cedric flips around to start but the threat of Paydirt sends him outside. Shelton takes him back inside where he gets caught with a dragon screw legwhip, meaning Cedric can start in on the knee. Benjamin manages to reverse into a modified Sharpshooter so Cedric goes straight to the rope. With Shelton being knocked to the floor, Cedric loads up a dive but runs into a jumping knee to the face. Back in and Paydirt is countered into a rollup, followed by the Neuralizer to drop Benjamin. Cedric takes WAY too long trash talking though and walks into the exploder suplex for the pin at 4:22.

Rating: C. The ending was a bit of a surprise, but then again I’ve long since given up on believing the idea that Alexander is ever going to get a push on his own. I’m not sure what WWE doesn’t see in him, if nothing else as a good hand in the ring. Shelton isn’t likely to get a push either, but at least the match told a story. A short story, but a story nonetheless.

We recap Angel Garza kicking a rose, uh, up Drew Gulak.

Gulak interrupts Garza’s photo shoot and asks if he is going to be serious. Garza doesn’t seem to mind and threatens to do it again, if they have a next time.

Rhea Ripley vs. Asuka

Non-title. Ripley drives her up against the ropes to start but has to duck a shot to the face. A standoff lets Ripley stick out her jaw for a free shot, only to have Asuka sweep the leg. Ripley blocks a drop toehold into the corner and then has to go to the ropes to block a cross armbreaker. They head outside with Ripley getting in a shot of her own….and here is Charlotte for a distraction so Asuka can hit a spinning backfist.

We take a break and come back with Charlotte on commentary as Ripley steps on Asuka’s back. Some clotheslines drops Asuka again but she sends Ripley outside. The knee off the apron has Ripley in trouble but she blocks the Asuka Lock back inside. Asuka is knocked outside where she glares at Charlotte, allowing Ripley to nail a headbutt.

Back in and Riptide is countered into a Codebreaker for two. Ripley heads outside to yell at Charlotte, allowing Asuka to hit a hip attack off the announcers’ table. Back in and a missile dropkick gives Asuka two but the hip attack in the corner is pulled out of the air. Ripley kicks Asuka in the head and hits Riptide for the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C. I’m really not sure what it means when I’m relieved that Ripley got a win. The title reign has been a near disaster for her, as Ripley has gone from being the brand new big deal to playing third fiddle to these two (and maybe even fifth fiddle to Nia Jax and Alexa Bliss). It will help a bit if she retains on Sunday, but it isn’t going to matter if we just get another Charlotte story out of the whole thing.

Here’s the same video on Lashley vs. Strowman which opened the show.

Drew McIntyre isn’t worried about Braun Strowman tonight because he’s moving on to Wrestlemania Backlash to get the title back.

John Morrison vs. Damian Priest

Miz is here with Morrison and the winner picks the stipulation between Miz and Priest on Sunday. Priest starts fast with a side slam but Morrison kicks him in the ribs. Morrison can’t pull him quite into a rollup so he hammers away instead. A spinning knee to the face gives Morrison two and we hit the chinlock. Miz turns into a cheerleader, making it clear that in fact, drippin ain’t easy.

Back up and Morrison misses a charge to wind up on the apron, where Priest misses some kicks to the head. Morrison hits his own kicks, but Priest is right back with a pop up forearm to the face. The rope is grabbed for the break and Miz pulls Morrison to the floor for a chat. Miz and Priest tease a brawl and we take a break. Back with Priest being knocked outside again, where Miz gets in a big boot.

Morrison adds in a few kicks to the ribs for two, followed by a Russian legsweep for the same. We hit a neck crank (like Morrison is loading up a neckbreaker but just pulls instead of dropping down) but Priest escapes and hits his own kicks to the head. The Broken Arrow gives Priest two, followed by the top rope spinwheel kick for the same. Miz offers a distraction so there is no count when Morrison grabs a crucifix. Instead Priest hits a clothesline and Hits The Lights for the pin at 12:57.

Post match Miz runs in to go after Priest but he breaks away, sending Miz running. Another Hit The Lights plants Morrison and Miz is terrified. No stipulation is announced yet.

Bobby Lashley and Braun Strowman bump into each other in the back.

Eva Marie talks about looking like a supermodel but wanting to be a role model.

Priest picks a lumberjack match.

Backlash rundown.

Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. It’s a brawl to start but Lashley can’t get an early Hurt Lock. Instead he snaps McIntyre’s throat across the top and grabs a neckbreaker for two. Some choking on the ropes keeps McIntyre in trouble until he gets in a shot to the face to take things outside. McIntyre snaps off an overhead belly to belly and we take a break.

Back with Lashley puling McIntyre off the middle rope for a crash, followed by the Downward Spiral for two. We hit the chinlock but Lashley’s suplex attempt is countered into one from McIntyre. Lashley runs him over again though and they head outside with McIntyre being posted this time. Back in and McIntyre sends him flying into the corner, followed by a pair of belly to belly suplexes.

There’s a jumping neckbreaker into the nipup and the Glasgow Kiss rocks Lashley again. MVP is panicking as McIntyre grabs a spinebuster for two. Lashley is back with a crossbody but the Hurt Lock is blocked. Instead Lashley suplexes him down, only to walk into the Claymore. Cue Braun Strowman to jump McIntyre from behind for the DQ at 13:27.

Rating: D+. They might as well have had a big clock over the ring here, counting down until Strowman ran in. There was little drama here and the WWE Title match at Wrestlemania should not feel like a tired match thirty days after the show. This feud has been a nightmare for everyone involved, including the people watching it, and this was the latest boring piece added onto the top.

Post match, Strowman gives McIntyre a running powerslam, followed by one to Lashley for daring to hug Strowman. Another powerslam plants McIntyre, and another sends Lashley through the part of the barricade designed for destruction. A third powerslam plants McIntyre to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This show felt so lazy. You had two Wrestlemania rematches tonight, and both matches were designed to make me see two triple threat matches on Sunday, albeit with Charlotte and Braun Strowman added. Throw in that the other Raw match is a stripped down version of the big tag match from Wrestlemania and this doesn’t feel so much like Wrestlemania Backlash, but rather Wrestlemania’s direct to video sequel with the same plot slightly dressed up. In no way does this make me want to see Sunday’s show, but rather it just makes me think there is nothing to the Raw half of the pay per view.

You know what else makes this show look bad? Smackdown, which also has three matches set, but all of them are fresh matches. It makes me think that they are trying over there, which is a heck of a lot more than I get watching Raw. There is nothing here to make me think that Raw is going to be a good show week to week, and that is leaving out the magic and tomatoes. Raw is just horrible at the moment and the mixture of lazy and bad is striking. There were a few minor pieces in here that worked, but the repetitive storytelling and uninspired build have made me want to watch a test pattern instead of Backlash. Do better.

Results

Asuka/Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke b. Charlotte/Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler – Shining Wizard to Baszler

Jinder Mahal b. Jeff Hardy – Khallas

RKBro/New Day b. AJ Styles/Omos/Jaxson Ryker/Elias – RKO to Elias

Sheamus b. Humberto Carrillo via referee stoppage

Shelton Benjamin b. Cedric Alexander – Exploder suplex

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka – Riptide

Damian Priest b. John Morrison – Hit The Lights

Drew McIntyre b. Bobby Lashley via DQ when Braun Strowman interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 20, 2006
Location: 1^st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and the show is mostly set. That is a rather good situation to have here as WWE is fresh off a European tour so they might not be going as hard as usual. You can always use a nice push towards the pay per view though and that very well may be the case here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Team Cena to get things going. John Cena talks about how they are ready to go but the Big Show had to jump him last week. If that’s the case, then come out here and let’s have this fight right now. Instead it’s Rated-RKO coming through the crowd with their pretty awful remix and the rest of their team. They are ready for Johnny Nitro to win the Intercontinental Title tonight and that is going to give them four champions on their team (plus MIKE KNOX!).

Hold on though as here are Ric Flair and some other legends, with Flair calling out Rated-RKO for winning the titles in a glorified handicap match. Rated-RKO and company are pathetic….and speaking of pathetic, here is the Spirit Squad through another part of the crowd with Kenny saying he has a special cheer for being the youngest Survivor Series captain of all time. Cue Team DX through the crowd, with Shawn Michaels saying we should start the Royal Rumble RIGHT NOW!

HHH offers a quick correction and make jokes about how easy the Spirit Squad really is. Now yeah Cena wants Big Show out here, but HHH saw an open case of Twinkies in the back so he isn’t coming out. HHH introduces his team but Edge cuts off the catchphrase, saying everyone is sick of them. Even Cena must be sick of them! Cena says not exactly, but he’s ready to fight Team Rated-RKO right now.

Instead here is Team Big Show on the stage, so Cena says let’s just have everyone get in the ring and see who is left standing. People start getting in but here is Vince McMahon to interrupt. We aren’t going to have a bunch of individual matches tonight, but we will have an eight man tag captain’s main event. That seems to work with everyone, though I don’t know how much choice they had.

Umaga vs. Sabu

Umaga knocks him down to start and the pace slows in a hurry. Sabu gets knocked outside and then thrown back inside so Umaga can knock him down again. Back up and Sabu hits a few hip attacks, setting up a springboard tornado DDT to rock the monster. That’s about it though as the Spike finishes Sabu in a hurry.

Rating: D. Just a quick squash to make it clear that Umaga is a mask. He does that kind of thing quite well and having him beat up Sabu worked well. Sabu is one of those people who can take a loss without being damaged in any serious way and I can’t imagine he is going to be that big of a factor in the Survivor Series match anyway.

Torrie Wilson is in the ring with the t-shirt gun and Jerry Lawler gets on the table so she can shoot one at him. Cue Chris Masters to say that’s a big gun, but has Torrie ever seen guns like his? Masters knows Torrie can’t break the Masterlock, but he knows some better positions for her anyway. Cue Carlito to interrupt and say that Masters may have big guns but it’s just a little pistol where it counts. Carlito drops Masters and hugs Torrie, which allows Masters to get up with the Masterlock. Lawler makes the save.

Johnny Nitro and Melina dedicate Nitro’s ladder match for the Intercontinental Title against Jeff Hardy to Kevin Federline. They’re winning tonight and then at Survivor Series, and then they are going to party with Kevin Federline after he beats John Cena on New Year’s Day.

Kenny picks Nicky to face Dusty Rhodes tonight. Hold on though as Kenny goes to yell at Ric Flair, who seems to be enjoying the company of Candice Michelle. Candice whispers in Flair’s ear and Flair smiles, but Kenny promises to end him on Sunday. Flair has two words for Kenny: WOO, and Ron Simmons, who is replacing Roddy Piper on Sunday, says the other. Kenny realizes he’s in trouble.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

Nitro, with Melina, is challenging in a ladder match. They go with some grappling to start until Hardy is sent into the corner. Nitro charges into a raised boot though and Hardy hits the Whisper in the Wind. Hardy sends him outside for the suicide dive and we take a break. Back with Nitro cutting off the climb so Hardy moves the ladder into the corner. For some reason Nitro climbs as well so he gets shoved down in a big crash.

Hardy dropkicks the ladder into Nitro for a nasty crash and goes up, only to have Nitro come up again and kick him down for the crash sequel. Back up and Hardy slams him onto the ladder but the Swanton only hits ladder. Nitro throws the ladder at him and it winds up hanging around Hardy’s head for a pretty awesome visual.

A dropkick drops Hardy and Nitro throws him into the ladder in the corner for another knockdown. Nitro hits him in the back with a ladder but Hardy brings in another one, meaning it’s a double climb. Hardy is fine enough to hit a heck of a sunset bomb down and then hits the signature jump over the ladder into the big legdrop. With Nitro down, Hardy puts the ladder on top of Nitro and climbs up to retain the title.

Rating: B. Rather good TV ladder match here with some pretty cool spots. Hardy winning should end the feud, at least for now, and they have traded the title enough over the last few weeks. You don’t get to see a match that feels this big on regular TV so it was pretty cool for a blowoff to a pretty how feud.

This Week In Wrestling History: Undertaker debuted at Survivor Series 1990.

Dusty Rhodes is ready to do various things to Nicky, including cooking and smoking. There are very few people who can make such nonsense work.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Nicky

They starts slowly with Nicky being smart enough to bail from the threat of the Bionic Elbow. Back in and Nicky gets in a few shots to the ribs to knock Dusty into the corner. A kick to the knee takes Dusty down but he’s back up with a few right hands. The gyrating sets up the Bionic Elbow and the strut into the big elbow drop finishes Nicky.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? Dusty is mostly retired and it isn’t like the Spirit Squad is going to lose much by taking another loss. Nicky is just another name on a list of losers at this point so getting beaten by one of the biggest stars of all time is hardly some career death sentence.

Edge and Lita are enjoying each others’ company but Randy Orton brings Maria in for a question. She asks if the two of them are going to be able to win twice in a row….but there is some kind of hullabaloo in the next room. It’s Cryme Tyme yelling about something so Rated-RKO goes in, with Orton saying they are going to be champions for a long time if this is their competition.

Cryme Tyme calls him a metrosexual and….something else. Orton has no idea what they just said but Edge says he is down with this. He spent a lot of time, ahem, bonding with Whitney Houston videos when he was younger. Maria: “I LOVE WHITNEY HOUSTON!” After a pause over that, Edge promises to make DX just like Cryme Tyme, by beating them black. And blue. Rated-RKO leave but Cryme Tyme stop Maria so they can watch See No Evil together. Maria doesn’t seem interested by they put her on the couch and get rather close to her. Well that got rather creepy in a hurry.

Lita vs. Mickie James

Non-title and Lita has another stipulation: this time Maria has to be blindfolded. Coach puts the hood on her but Mickie gets in a few shots anyway. That doesn’t last long though as Lita knocks her down and hits the DDT. The moonsault (with the leg hitting Mickie in the face) finishes Mickie in a hurry.

Post match Lita grabs the mic and goes on a rant about how awesome she is. She single handedly revolutionized women’s wrestling in WWE. Before her, women were all eye candy but then she brought in moonsaults and Litacanranas. She has sacrificed her knee and her neck while the people yell at her every week. Without her, there is no Mickie James or Trish Stratus because she inspired a generation of women (true, at least on the inspiration part). That’s why it is going to be so easy to walk away on Sunday, because she is retiring after Survivor Series.

Rated-RKO run into Kenny and Big Show, which makes Orton think they are ready.

Here’s a look at the violence on the See No Evil DVD, because now we need the home video pounded into our head too.

Smackdown Rebound.

Survivor Series rundown.

Rated-RKO/Kenny/Big Show vs. D-Generation X/John Cena/Ric Flair

It’s a brawl to start before DX is here to even things up. House is cleaned in a hurry with Edge getting beaten up by all four of the good guys. Big Show saves him from Sweet Chin Music so they beat Show down instead. We take a break and are joined in progress with Kenny slamming Shawn to set up a very quickly broken chinlock.

Orton comes in for some stomping and Show drops the big leg. Edge pulls on both arms at the same time before Orton comes back in….to miss the RKO. That’s enough for the hot tag to Cena and the house is cleaned in a hurry. Everything breaks down and Cena hits the FU to finish Kenny in a hurry.

Rating: C-. This felt like they just threw a bunch of people out there at once and hoped for the best, which is not the worst idea in the world. They didn’t want to do anything too big before the pay per view and what we got here was good enough. Cena pinning Kenny isn’t going to hurt him as, again, the Spirit Squad have been portrayed as losers for months. The rest of the people just happened to be there too.

Post match the rest of the teams come in for the big brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Pretty good go home show here as it made me want to see the pay per view a lot more than I did before. Having all of those teams out there made for a really cool feeling and having them all in action on Sunday should make for a good show. I liked this more than I was expecting to and you could feel how important the whole thing is going to be when we get to Survivor Series.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 13, 2006
Location: Manchester Evening News Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 15,266
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are on one of the foreign excursion shows as Raw is over in England on the way to Survivor Series. Some of the Survivor Series matches have already been set and that should make for a few different paths while the show is on vacation. Now just get us there in a few interesting pieces. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s DX to get things going, complete with an announcement of their Survivor Series elimination match with Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO during their entrance. HHH says they have been around the UK and now he wants to hear the loudest crowd yet. After asking for some silence, he asks if we’re ready and gets the reaction he wants. With that out of the way….he doesn’t really have anything else funny to say (by his own admission) so we hit the catchphrase.

Shawn gets in his own catchphrase and now it’s time to get to business: the people they have embarrassed with the help of Big Dick Johnson. The latest is Eric Bischoff, and yes we have a clip from last week. Shawn wants to see it again in slow motion, meaning the jiggling is even stronger this time. After hearing that Shawn threw up in his mouth a bit, HHH is ready to move on to Edge and Randy Orton but here is Coach instead.

Coach makes some threats and Shawn thinks that he might BAN THEM FROM THE BUILDING AGAIN. Which worked so well last week you see. Actually no, because Coach has issued a bounty of 5,200 pounds, or about $10,000, on DX. HHH: “YOU CHEAP BAST***!” HHH can’t believe that they are only worth five grand each. Coach needs a bake sale or a lemonade stand or something. Actually there are some people wanting to claim the bounty right now.

D-Generation X vs. Viscera/Charlie Haas/Trevor Murdoch/Lance Cade

Joined in progress with Shawn, in street clothes like HHH, reversing Cade into the corner to chop away. Murdoch comes in for a big boot but Shawn manages to take him down as well. It’s off to Viscera for a swinging Boss Man Slam to set up the gyrations, followed by the tag off to Haas. Shawn gets taken down again and Cade slaps on the neck crank to keep him down. That would be down for a few seconds as Shawn fights up with an enziguri. The hot tag brings in HHH to clean house as everything breaks down. Sweet Chin Music knocks Viscera off the apron and down onto Cade and Murdoch. The Pedigree finishes Haas.

Rating: D+. Another quick and dominant performance from DX, which might be a bit more interesting if we haven’t seen the same thing over and over for months. The team is still needing top stars to face and while Rated-RKO fits the bill, they can only do that so often. That leaves us with some pretty lame matches in these spots, but getting DX out there for the live crowd makes sense.

Post break, Kenny tells the Spirit Squad to cash in on the bounty. DX pops in and beats them up while talking about how annoying the bounty can be. This was funny.

Spirit Squad vs. Highlanders

Robbie headbutts Johnny down to start and it’s off to Rory for two off a high crossbody. Kenny comes in and launches Johnny at Rory to take over. Rory fights out of a chinlock and gets over for the hot tag to Robbie. House is cleaned but the Scot Drop is broken up, allowing Kenny to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. Pretty boring match here and that isn’t the biggest surprise. The tag division means nothing around here and the titles are back to being on another special team who isn’t likely to have them very long. I’m not sure who can take the titles next, and I can’t exactly say I’m surprised by that at all. You get used to it over the years.

Post match Kenny takes the full credit for the win.

We look at Chris Masters facing Jerry Lawler last week, despite Lawler being handcuffed to the top rope.

Wrestlemania tickets went on sale last week.

It’s time for the Masterlock Challenge with Jerry Lawler as this week’s…..contestant? Participant? Actually it is victim, as Masters takes his time but eventually puts it on, shrugs off Lawler’s elbows to the face (you would think someone would have tried that already) and wins. This was just about every Masterlock Challenge so far.

DX is having some food when Eugene comes in to see them about the bounty. HHH gives him some paper towels and shuts the door but that’s not what Eugene means. Eugene charges in and hits the table of food, with DX leaving him as Shawn worries about weighing too much from all the popcorn.

Lita is ready to beat Mickie James tonight and at Survivor Series because she is the best of all time.

DX is in the bathroom and HHH needs Shawn to leave. Chris Masters jumps him in the stall and we get something out of Austin Powers.

Todd Grisham replaces Lawler on commentary.

Umaga vs. John Cena

Non-title. Cena slugs away to start and avoids a charge, setting up the bulldog. Umaga pops up and runs him over though, setting up the Samoan drop. We hit the nerve hold but Cena fights up with the shoulders. That’s enough to tie Umaga in the ropes….and here’s Big Show to run in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. This was energetic which it lasted but it isn’t like they had time to go anywhere. It wasn’t meant to be some kind of a full match so this is about as good as it could have been. Umaga continues to rise up the ranks and they have planted the seeds for a showdown with Cena down the line, which should work out quite well for both of them. Big Show is here too and….yeah that’s about all he has going for him at the moment.

Post match the big beatdown is on and Cena is left laying after both finishers.

DX comes in to see Coach because they’re stressed over the whole night. We see a montage of the night, set to the Benny Hill theme. That’s enough for DX, because they are heading out. HHH asks if that counts as them getting the $10,000, which is of course a no, but Shawn steals it anyway.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

Nitro, with Melina, is defending, and in what might not be a good sign, Hardy’s entrance is cut out of the Peacock version (though maybe it is due to a recap sponsored by a movie). Hardy shoulders him down for two and they fight over a top wristlock. Nitro gets the better of things but Hardy sends him outside, followed by the right hands to the head back inside. The threat of a Swanton sends Nitro outside and there’s a slingshot dropkick through the ropes to put him down again.

We take a break and come back with Nitro’s springboard kick to the face getting two. Nitro takes him down for some more near falls and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Hardy fights up and crotches him on top, with JR making various jokes about Melina’s evening plans. The Whisper in the Wind misses so Nitro grabs a sitout belly to back faceplant for two more.

Nitro goes up but dives into a sitout powerbomb, setting up the Swanton. Melina offers a quick distraction like she is supposed to do, allowing Nitro to come back with a neckbreaker. A corkscrew moonsault gives Nitro two….but Hardy reverses into a crucifix for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. These two work well together and I’m kind of getting into these rapid fire title changes. They are making it feel like they have an important feud here and that is something that has been missing from the title picture for a little while. The match wasn’t great, but they kept the energy going and I’m curious to see where it goes.

Post match Nitro knocks Hardy down again and pulls out a ladder to crush him again.

DX wants to go back inside and mess with things but the show is sold out. They do however find a couple of scalpers….in the form of Cryme Tyme. HHH has no idea what they’re saying, but Shawn channels Ms. Nanny from the Muppet Babies by speaking jive (with HHH being completely lost) to get the tickets they need. HHH: “For shizzle!” Cryme Tyme: “……..ok?”

Carlito discovers the Daily Star girls (who don’t wear much in the papers) and here’s Torrie Wilson with two of the Daily Star girls in person. They’re going out tonight and Torrie offers him the chance to crash with her. Carlito: “THAT’S A GREAT IDEA!”

We look back at Cena being beaten down.

Survivor Series rundown, including Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker in a first blood match.

DX is giving away shirts (and has a large sausage) in the back. They head into the arena with more shirts and toss them to the crowd, with HHH throwing them one to a rather pretty brunette. I’d guess she’s about 15 here, meaning it would be about eight and a half years before I married her.

Post break, DX is now in the front row.

Lita vs. Mickie James

Non-title but hang on because she has a special rule: Mickie has to wrestle with her legs shackled together. Coach brings out the shackles, which he just happened to have lying around. Mickie says that’s cool but Lita is the one who needs her legs tied together. Lita takes her down without much trouble and hammers away, followed by the stomping. DX starts doing various chants that I don’t understand so Lita goes over to yell.

HHH hands her the sausage (hush) and sprays mustard in her face (I repeat my hush), allowing Mickie to hit her in the face with the sausage. The MickieDT is good for the pin, with Grisham suggesting that Lita knows about being hit in the face with a sausage. Gee they seem to be being especially mean to her lately.

Rated-RKO comes out with Coach and DX is ejected by a bunch of security (one of whom is better known as Sheamus).

Tag Team Titles: Rated-RKO vs. Ric Flair/Roddy Piper

Flair and Piper are defending but Piper gets jumped before the match, setting up the Conchairto on the floor. That leaves Flair on his own and you know he’s fine with that. Edge takes him down to start and the beatdown is on in a hurry. Orton comes in to hammer away as we have a WOO sign held up by about twenty fans. They head outside with Orton hammering away against the barricade and Edge grabs a chinlock back inside. Flair gets in a low blow and strikes away but Edge spears him down to break up the Figure Four for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This was an angle instead of a match for the most part, though it isn’t a surprise that Flair and Piper lost the titles. The worst part here was that Piper was not wrestling as he was sent home from the tour early due to being diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma, which was only found due to him working for WWE after the fans voted him in at Cyber Sunday. I can’t imagine they would have kept the titles much longer, but it would have been a bit better under almost any other circumstances.

Post match DX runs in for the beatdown, including taking down security, with Sheamus taking the Pedigree to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Well it was certainly an eventful show and the DX bounty story worked fine as a one off story. Rated-RKO winning something helps them a bit and having stars that big winning the titles should give them a bit of a boost. Outside of Cryme Tyme, it isn’t like there is a regular team worth getting the belts (and they don’t really need them) so this was about as good of a move as they had. Not the best show, but quite a few things happened here, which can make for a good show.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 6, 2006
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are done with Cyber Sunday and the big story continues to be John Cena vs. Kevin Federline. That might not be the most thrilling story in the world, but hopefully we can move on from this and get on the way to Survivor Series at the end of the month. If nothing else we have new Tag Team Champions with the probable and at the same time improbable team of Ric Flair and Roddy Piper. Let’s get to it.

Here is Cyber Sunday if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Kevin Federline costing John Cena the World Heavyweight Championship last night.

Opening sequence.

Here is Rated RKO, complete with the new Women’s Champion Lita (who has Lawler’s jaw dropping in a hurry). Edge brags about their accomplishments last night and again names the team. There will be no DX tonight to make their stupid jokes and we see why, with a clip of Rated RKO stealing the win last night. Randy Orton says they handed DX their first ever loss and it is all because of the fans voting for Eric Bischoff.

Therefore, here is Bischoff to thank the fans and Rated RKO for their performance last night. In addition, Bischoff needs to thank Vince McMahon, who agrees that controversy creates cash. We get another book plug with Bischoff talking about how much money it is making for the company. As a result, Vince McMahon is allowing Bischoff to run Raw for one night only.

Bischoff even has some ideas for tonight. First of all, John Cena has the night off and DX is banned from the building. Bischoff announces Johnny Nitro, with Melina, who he thanks for firing Mick Foley, will challenge Jeff Hardy for the Intercontinental Title, but here are Ric Flair and Roddy Piper to interrupt. Flair is very fired up about their win last night and is ready to beat up Bischoff to celebrate.

Edge reminds Flair of the last time they were on the Cutting Edge together and Edge beat the heck out of him. That’s too far for Piper, who says the Cutting Edge is a Piper’s Pit ripoff. Granted it’s a good one, while Orton can’t even rip off his old man. Also, who is Bischoff to talk about controversy when Piper was born into controversy? The music plays but Bischoff says hang on a second because tonight it is going to be Flair/Piper defending against Rated RKO in a No DQ match.

John Cena has been on all kinds of media stops for the Marine. So now we’re talking about Cena talking about the movie?

Intercontinental Title: Johnny Nitro vs. Jeff Hardy

Nitro, with Melina, is challenging. During the entrances, we see Nitro and Melina at Kevin Federline’s CD release party. Nitro starts in with the hammerlock but Hardy sends him outside for a dive. Back in and Nitro sends him into the corner, allowing Melina to choke away. That’s enough for a DQ but Bischoff says restart it.

We do just that after a break and come back with Nitro getting two more as Melina screams a lot. Hardy fights up and they hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown. The sitout gordbuster gives Hardy two and the Whisper in the Wind gets the same. Melina comes in for a quickly broken choke but Hardy goes up top for the Swanton. Nitro crotches him down in a hurry and gets in a belt shot for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere but they are doing a nice job with spicing up the Intercontinental Title a bit. Just by having people fighting over the title and then trading it a few times is more interesting than having it sit around for months. The matches have been fine enough too and both guys are getting more TV time and a bit of a boost as a result. Not a bad job.

Eric Bischoff brags about the power he has and makes the Spirit Squad vs. Jim Duggan/Eugene with the losing team never being able to team again. Jonathan Coachman is pleased but here is Maria, who Bischoff remembers at his trial last year. Bischoff thinks she pretends to be stupid but has all kinds of brains. Those brains will be splattered all around the ring tonight when she faces Umaga.

JR is incensed.

Kevin Federline pops up on screen to challenge John Cena for a match on the New Year’s Day edition of Raw.

Spirit Squad vs. Jim Duggan/Eugene

The losing team can no longer team together and it’s Kenny/Johnny for the Squad. Eugene gets hammered down to start but Johnny gets annoyed at Kenny for a blind tag. Kenny whips Johnny into the corner to clothesline Eugene, meaning we can hit the chinlock. Eugene fights up for a Rock Bottom and it’s off to Duggan to clean house. Everything breaks down and Kenny grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin.

Post match Duggan and Eugene are upset, only to have Eugene jump him from behind. Eugene beats on him with the board and runs away in hysterics.

We get a clip from the new Roddy Piper DVD, featuring a look at the history between Piper and Ric Flair. That really is quite the pairing/rivalry over the years.

Umaga vs. Maria

Coach drags Maria out and the stalking is on in a hurry. Maria gets pulled out of the corner and eventually Samoan dropped, leaving her mostly destroyed. The running hip attack in the corner connects, but here’s John Cena for the save and what should be a DQ but we’ll go with the no contest here.

Post match Cena cleans house and Umaga bails. Cena says everything is messed up and crazy around here. North is south and the last time he remembered seeing Eric Bischoff was when he was being thrown in a dumpster. Then you have Kevin Federline calling him out for a fight. It’s time to make some sense around here, so he FU’s Todd Grisham for interviewing him and says Umaga can bring it.

As for Kevin Federline, he better use that $300 million he got for marrying Brittney and buy an army, a navy and an air force, because that’s the only way he’s getting out of Miami on New Year’s Day. Hit me baby one more time, because the match is on. It doesn’t matter if you’re Kevin Federline, Eric Bischoff, ABBA, the Charlie Daniels Band or the ghosts of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid; he is John Cena and he is right here. Cena vs. Umaga works for me.

Bischoff brags to Lita about his success tonight and she is looking forward to Rated RKO having some success tonight. What he doesn’t understand is why Lita wants to defend the title against Mickie James tonight, but she whispers something in his ear. Bischoff approves, and then makes himself guest referee for the Tag Team Title match tonight.

Carlito and Torrie Wilson seemed to have fun on their date last week but here’s Shelton Benjamin to say he would have won the Intercontinental Title last night. He’ll beat Carlito tonight and is sure that the only reason he didn’t get the shot is because he’s a black man. Shelton says it proves that Americans are prejudiced against minorities. Carlito: “CARLITO’S A PUERTO RICAN!”

Carlito insults him in Spanish and Shelton is annoyed, despite not knowing what it means. Shelton talks about little black kids singing their theme song as a lullaby in China and Yugoslavia. Black men around the world look up to him, so here is Ron Simmons for the catchphrase which is becoming a bigger deal week after week.

This Week In Wrestling History: The Wrestling Classic. There is a show you don’t hear about very often.

Chris Masters is in the ring when Bischoff comes up on the screen to say Masters needs an opponent. Let’s make that JR, who has been bad mouthing Bischoff all night. Jerry Lawler says not so fast because he’ll fight Bischoff right now. Bischoff says no, but Lawler can wrestle Masters. Oh and for a bonus, if Lawler wants to keep his job, he can wrestle the match with one arm handcuffed to the top rope.

Chris Masters vs. Jerry Lawler

Coach brings out the handcuff and gets punched out before Lawler’s wrist is cuffed. Lawler gets in a few shots but Masters knocks him down and gets straight to the choking. The referee uncuffs Lawler so the Masterlock can finish him off in a hurry.

Cryme Tyme replaces King on commentary, which could be fascinating.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Shelton seems cool with Cryme Tyme before the match and jumps Carlito early. The beatdown is on with Shelton choking away and slapping on the chinlock. Carlito fights up in a hurry and the springboard elbow is good for two. Shelton misses the spinwheel kick to the face and gets caught in a flapjack for two more. Back up and Shelton hits a big boot but Shad picks up Shelton’s necklace. The distraction lets Carlito hit the Backstabber for the fast pin. JR: “SHELTON HAS LOST THE MATCH AND HIS BLING BLING!”

Coach joins commentary.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Mickie James

Lita is defending and, upon Bischoff’s orders, Mickie has to wrestle with one arm behind her back. The referee takes way too long to get the knot tied, to the point where Lita is telling him to get on with it. Lita circles her a few times and then grabs a Russian legsweep. The moonsault misses though and Mickie hammers away, only to get caught with the DDT to retain Lita’s title in a hurry.

Post match Lita announces herself as the winner and introduces Bischoff as the referee for the main event.

Tag Team Titles: Rated RKO vs. Ric Flair/Roddy Piper

Piper and Flair are defending, No DQ with Bischoff as referee and Lita is here too. Flair chops Edge in the corner to start but Edge gets in a quick knockdown. A missile dropkick (with Edge having to stretch to connect) gets two but Flair gets over for the tag to Piper without much effort. Piper’s knee to the face gets two on Edge, setting up the sleeper. Lita offers a distraction though and Orton chairs Piper in the head.

Orton, with a cut between his eyes, holds Piper down so Edge can drop an elbow. Edge drags Piper by the very pale leg back into the corner, allowing Orton to get in his required chinlock. That doesn’t work very well for Edge though so he grabs one of his own before sending Piper outside.

A chair shot only hits post, allowing Piper to get over for the tag off to Flair. Everything breaks down but Orton kicks the Figure Four off, sending Flair into Bischoff. Edge spears Flair down so another referee comes out to count two. Cue DX to lay out Orton though and Flair gets the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. This was just a way to get to the ending and that is not the best way to go most of the time. I don’t think anyone is believing that Flair and Piper, the latter of whom can barely move, are going to be champions for long so there was some drama here, but it was hardly the most thrilling match. Flair can still do his thing well enough, but the point here was to have DX run in and that’s fine.

Post match Bischoff is surrounded by DX and this isn’t going to go well. HHH has a special for him tonight, with three words: BIG DICK JOHNSON. I think you know everything that is going to happen to close the show from here and….indeed it is exactly that, complete with DX being painted on a certain part of Johnson, with Bischoff’s face going into the letters.

Overall Rating: C. They had a stand alone show after the pay per view and before they go to Europe next week. There was a lot going on here but it is pretty fine for a one off show. Cena vs. Umaga is an interesting way to go in the next few weeks and I’m curious to see where we are going to go with the rest of the show. This one didn’t change anything in the long term but it filled in two hours after a pay per view and I don’t think they were trying to do anything else.

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Cyber Sunday 2006
Date: November 5, 2006
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for the interactive show as we have the fans picking a lot of the specifics about the card. This can range from stipulations to titles on the line to participants, though hopefully we don’t have more of the two joke options and one real one. The main event is the Champion of Champions match, which certainly sounds big. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how the fans have the power and runs down the major matches/fan choices.

The huge computer setup with the keyboard stage looks awesome.

Umaga vs. ???

Kane – 49%

The Sandman – 28%

Chris Benoit – 23%

There’s something surprising about Benoit finishing last, though Kane has been feuding with Umaga and Sandman at least got a promo about the match. Umaga has Armando Alejandro Estrada with him. The slugout is on to start with Kane knocking him into the corner and choking away. Kane charges into a belly to belly suplex though and earns himself a kick to the chest for trying the sit up. The spinwheel kick drops Kane again and there’s a facebuster to cut off the comeback attempt.

Umaga hits a pretty far middle rope headbutt for two and they head outside, where the Samoan Spike only hits the post. Back in and some running clotheslines rock Umaga, who is right back with the Samoan drop. Kane sits up again and avoids a splash in the corner, setting up a belly to back suplex. It’s time to go up but Umaga knocks him out of the air, setting up a jumping Samoan Spike for the pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad power brawl here and that is all it needed to be. Let them go out there and have a fun match, which worked out rather well because they’re both good at this kind of thing. Kane is going to be fine despite losing every single match in the feud because he is long established in his spot. Umaga is rolling though and there aren’t many spots left for him before going to the main event.

Queen Sharmell talks to Big Show and suggests a King Booker/Show alliance. Show says she may be beautiful, but offers to put that shiny scepter somewhere.

Cryme Tyme vs. Charlie Haas/Viscera vs. Highlanders vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Texas Tornado – 50%

Tag Team Turmoil – 35%

Fatal Four Way – 15%

I don’t think this was mentioned on TV, or at least not mentioned extensively. The brawl is on in a hurry with Cade and Murdoch and the Highlanders fighting out to the floor. Haas gets low bridged out to the floor but Viscera’s elbow misses JTG. A middle rope splash gets two with Cade making the save.

The Highlanders come in and clear the ring before everyone heads out to the floor. JTG is back in with a dropkick to Haas and Shad slugs away on Viscera. That earns Shad a swinging Boss Man Slam, leaving the Highlanders to slug it out with Cade and Murdoch. Robbie gets dropped with a High/Low but Shad takes out Cade and JTG steals the pin.

Rating: C-. This was short but energetic as Cryme Tyme gets another win to keep their momentum going. That is such a lost art these days and it is nice to see Cryme Tyme getting a push. They might not be the greatest or most polished team in the world, but they are getting more and more popular while establishing themselves as a good team. It still really can be that simple.

Post match Cryme Tyme steals Lawler’s laptop. Lawler: “IT’S NOT EVEN PAID FOR YET!”

Shawn Michaels is messing with a laptop when HHH comes in to say stop worrying about the guest referee. They already shoved Vince’s head into Big Show’s tights and spray painted Coach, so that leaves Eric Bischoff as the one person they haven’t done something horrible to yet. Controversy does create case….but Shawn isn’t the controversial anymore. Shawn: “I’M THE ONE WHO PUT BRET HART IN THE SHARPSHOOTER YOU KNOW” And HHH married…..what’s her name!

Shawn sees a backstage worker named Stan (hi Shawn Spears) and superkicks him, saying he just kicked STAN. Shawn goes running down the hall, ranting about controversy and superkicking everyone he finds. HHH thinks it’s funny, and he’s absolutely right, as this is one of my all time favorite backstage segments. Shawn might not be the funniest guy ever, but he found a style that worked for him and played it very well, including the bizarre visual of him running around superkicking strangers. I throw this on when I need a laugh and it still holds up.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. ???

Carlito – 62%

Shelton Benjamin – 25%

Johnny Nitro – 13%

Well that’s a landslide. They trade knockdowns to start until Carlito dropkicks the knee out. A suplex gives Carlito two but Hardy hits a running dropkick to put him down as well. Carlito takes a breather on the floor and There’s the running dropkick through the ropes. Hardy’s run the barricade clothesline is dropkicked out of the air so they head back inside, where Hardy fights out of a chinlock.

The slingshot dropkick in the corner is blocked as well so Carlito slaps on a waistlock. Hardy grabs a rope but Carlito is right back with a double legdrop to the ribs. We hit the waistlock again as commentary says this is our third interactive pay per view, without actually mentioning Taboo Tuesday of course. A backbreaker gets two more on Hardy and the sleeper (Carlito: “GO TO SLEEP!”) goes on.

That’s broken up and Hardy hits something like a tornado DDT for two as Lawler won’t shut up about Hardy’s hair color. A sitout gordbuster drops Carlito again but he’s fine enough to get the knees up and block the Swanton. Carlito’s springboard elbow gets two so Hardy runs the corner for the Whisper in the Wind. Hardy goes up top where Carlito catches him, only to get shoved back for a crash. The Swanton retains the title.

Rating: B-. This started slowly but then turned into a rather fun back and forth match as they played a game of trying to top the other. Hardy didn’t so much win as much as hitting the last big move, which means we are likely to see more from Hardy vs. Carlito. I’m not sure how well Carlito’s face run is going, but he was in a pretty good one here..

We recap Edge/Randy Orton vs. DX. Edge and Orton were tired of DX dominating WWE and wanted revenge on them for apparently causing all of Edge and Orton’s problems. This needs a special guest referee though and Vince McMahon is an option.

D-Generation X vs. Edge/Randy Orton

Eric Bischoff – 60%

Jonathan Coachman – 20%

Vince McMahon – 20%

That’s a very surprising result as it’s weird to see McMahon on anything without winning. At least it’s something a little more fresh though. Before the match, DX spends a good amount of time playing to the crowd for some alternating cheers. Shawn finally gets in his catchphrase, because the fans shouting it first. JR officially dubs the team Rated RKO, which really was about as good of a name as you were getting.

Edge punches Shawn in the face a few times to start but gets knocked into the corner for a right hand from HHH. A rollup lets Shawn pull Edge’s tights down and then chops away (JR: “Shawn taking Edge out of his boots after he takes Edge out of his tights!”). The armbar doesn’t last long as it’s already off to HHH to hammer away on Edge’s jaw. Orton comes in and stomps away in the corner but HHH snaps off a suplex. There’s the knee drop for two and more pummeling ensues until Orton is knocked over for a tag to Edge.

This time it’s HHH getting hammered down in the corner with Orton coming in to do more of the same. A quick DDT gets HHH out of trouble so it’s back to Shawn to pick up the pace. Orton is sent outside and Edge is slammed down, setting up the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music is loaded up but Orton sweeps the leg and crotches him against the post. Some knee drops give Orton two and Edge comes back in for some stomping.

Commentary agrees that Bischoff has been fine so far as Edge hits a dropkick into a front facelock. Shawn fights up but gets his head taken off with a big boot for two more. Orton hits a dropkick for two and we hit the required chinlock. Another comeback is cut off by Orton’s backbreaker but Edge’s spear hits Bischoff. Shawn enziguris Edge down and the hot tag brings in HHH to clean house. The spear hits HHH and Edge throws in the crotch chop so Shawn crossbodies Edge out to the floor.

The RKO takes HHH down again and another referee comes in for two. Another RKO is shoved into Sweet Chin Music but Bischoff pulls the other referee out. Edge chairs Shawn down and another chair shot breaks up the Pedigree attempt (with Bischoff watching). The RKO onto the chair finishes HHH.

Rating: B. Yeah believe it or not, these four were able to have a good match. The shenanigans at the end were fine enough and HHH did do the job, despite kicking out of a spear and RKO in less than thirty seconds. Above all else, DX losing is the right thing because they were basically unbeatable for their entire reunion. They have needed someone to put them in check and if Rated RKO can do that then we might be able to get another dimension to the whole thing.

Video on the Marine.

Edge and Orton don’t want to hear about the chair and promise a new era in WWE. That era will be Rated RKO.

Lumberjack Match – 46%

No Disqualification – 40%

Submission Match – 14%

For the vacant title, though the rest of the women being in the ring before the match kind of spoiled things. Mickie is sent outside in a hurry but comes back in to throw Lita outside as well. JR mentions a possible wardrobe malfunction and Lawler is instantly more interested in the match. Back in and Lita hits a shoulder block but Mickie grabs the leg to cut her off. Lita tries to go to the apron but gets shoved back in as the women are near a brawl at ringside.

Lita snaps off a suplex for two but Mickie sends her face first into the buckle. Some choking takes Mickie down again though and the sleeper goes on. That’s reversed into a quickly broken Fujiwara armbar to mess up Lita’s elbow, allowing Mickie to hit some elbows to the face. The hurricanrana out of the corner is broken up and they both crash out to the floor. Back in and Mickie tries a tornado DDT….which lands in the corner. I’m not sure if that was a planned spot which looked bad or a botch but either way, egads. One of the women distracts Mickie though and a DDT gives Lita the title back.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but putting the title on Lita makes sense here. She is by far the biggest star the division has, even if she is not exactly the same as when she became a star in the first place. Mickie is going to be fine and is probably the future of the division. At least they had an out for her with the distraction, but it still wasn’t much of a match.

Kenny gives the Spirit Squad a pep talk, but has to explain why he is the leader. Apparently it’s because he beat Ric Flair, which is code for he’s the only one who has been treated as anything competent.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Ric Flair/??? vs. Spirit Squad

Roddy Piper – 46%

Dusty Rhodes – 35%

Sgt. Slaughter – 19%

Flair and Piper, who disturbingly takes his shirt off, are challenging. Rhodes and Slaughter come out to even things up and it’s Kenny starting with Flair. That means a headlock takeover and some WOOing but Kenny is right back up with a dropkick. Piper comes in to hammer away on and bite Mikey but he has to deal with the rest of the Squad. Mikey gets in a splash in the corner and hammers away on Piper with the rapid fire forearms to the back.

Kenny comes back in for a chinlock into a sleeper, before being smart and pulling Piper back into the corner. A slam looks to set up Mikey’s middle rope splash off of Kenny’s shoulders, which only hits mat. The hot tag brings in Flair for the assorted chops and a double clothesline puts Kenny on the floor. The Figure Four has Mikey in trouble but Kenny makes the save. Flair gets bored of dealing with Mikey though and pulls him down into the Figure Four for the win.

Rating: D+. I know Flair was old here but he was miles ahead of Piper, who not only looked horrible but could barely do anything. I can go with the old guys winning here though because it’s not like there is any team ready to take the titles, save for maybe Cryme Tyme. The Squad has been mostly done for a long time now though and it was long past time for them to drop the titles.

Post match the celebration is on. One thing you’ll notice about the legends: they treat winning titles like the biggest thing in the world. Learn from that.

We recap the main event, which is all three champions fighting at once.

We need a title to be defended.

Smackdown World Title – 67%

ECW World Title – 21%

Raw World Title – 12%

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Big Show vs. John Cena

Booker, with Sharmell, is defending and earns a right hand to the face for another proposed alliance. Show runs Cena over and whips him hard into the corner. A headbutt sends Cena outside so Booker finally comes in to kick Show into the corner. Show isn’t having any of that and chops away in the corner. Cena finally comes back in and the double teaming finally puts Show on the floor.

That leaves Cena to slug it out with Booker and the release fisherman’s suplex gets two, with Show pulling Cena to the floor. Show picks up the steps so Cena dropkicks the knee out to send Show face first into said steps. Back in and the Book End gives Booker two on Cena and the slugout is on again. A hot shot into a superkick gets two on Cena but he is right back with a belly to belly for two.

We get a bit of an awkward exchange until Booker takes him down into a chinlock. Cena powers out again and plants Booker for two as things slow down a bit. A splash of all things hits Booker’s knees and he grabs a DDT for two. The STF sends Booker to the ropes so Cena hits a clothesline into a suplex as we plug the Marine a bit. Booker gets crotched on top but Show is back with an electric chair to Cena, so Booker missile dropkicks Show in a smart move.

Show reverses a double suplex to put both of them down again and a double shoulder sends them flying as well. There’s the chokeslam to Booker and another shoulder puts Cena on the floor. Show loads up the announcers’ table but Cena posts him. Cena initiates the finishing sequence on Booker, chairs Show, FU’s an invading Sharmell, and grabs the STFU on Booker. Cue Kevin Federline to break it up with a chair though, allowing Booker to Cena with a belt shot to retain.

Rating: C-. I don’t think anyone was realistically expecting a title change here and there is nothing wrong with that most of the time. The Federline interference might not be the most popular ending but at least it is something they have set up in recent weeks and it gave them an out here. The Booker vs. Cena section was really awkward, but other than that it was a watchable enough match, even if it was a lot of waiting around until the obvious winner.

Overall Rating: C. This is one of the most “this was a show” shows I can remember for a long time. The wrestling was ok enough but the gimmick worked out fine, with some actual options for just about every match. It’s a gimmick show and the idea worked out well enough, but it isn’t a show I’m going to remember watching in a matter of hours, let alone any long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.