NWA-TNA Weekly PPV #6 (2024 Edition): What Does That Even Mean?

NWA TNA Weekly PPV #6
Date: July 24, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

I would say things are picking up around here but that isn’t exactly accurate. There are some things going on but a good may of them aren’t good. With a focus on the weird Puppet stuff, whatever the Dupps are doing and Jeff Jarrett as a focal point, the show isn’t exactly thrilling content. Hopefully it improves here though so let’s get to it.

Here is last week’s show if you need a recap.

We open with Jeff Jarrett smashing a bunch of people with chairs (as he did to end last week’s show). He says the NWA World Title is his and he wants Ken Shamrock out here right now. Shamrock is in the back and yells at Bob Armstrong, saying he’s going to the ring. After heading towards the ring, Shamrock locks a door and has a rather muscular man stand guard. Bill Behrens comes to the ring instead and suspends Jarrett, who chairs him in the head. Now Shamrock gets in for the brawl but some wrestlers come out to break it up, allowing Jarrett to chair Shamrock in the head.

Commentary previews the show.

Amazing Red vs. Low Ki

Red snaps off some armdrags to start and then kicks Ki outside. Back in and a middle rope clothesline drops Ki but he’s right back with a hard kick for two of his own. A butterfly suplex into a double underhook crank has Red in trouble but he fights right back out. Red goes up top, where Ki pulls him into a hanging dragon sleeper for some rather painful cranking.

They trade kicks to the head until Red’s hat flies off, which has him so annoyed that he hits a quick standing shooting star press for two. The Code Red gets two more but Ki strikes away, only to get dropped with a spinwheel kick. Red’s corkscrew moonsault misses though and the Ki Krusher 99 finishes for Ki at 7:29.

Rating: B. This is how you make someone into a bigger deal as Red was in there hanging with someone who almost won the X-Division Title last week. The perk of a promotion still being this new is that people can still make an impact in a hurry. That’s what Red did here and it was a heck of a match as the show kicks off fast.

Jeff Jarrett tries to get back stage but is blocked by the rather muscular man.

Hot Shots vs. Chris Harris/James Storm

Earlier today, Harris told Storm that the cowboy stuff was stupid and he better not fire those cap guns. The fight starts on the floor and we settle down to Storm headscissoring Stevens. Harris comes in with a spear and a belly to belly, but O’Reilly sends him outside. A drop onto the barricade has Harris in trouble for a change though and a dropkick gives O’Reilly two back inside.

Stevens hits a handspring elbow for two of his own, only for O’Reilly to miss (meaning hits, but only because Harris didn’t roll away face enough) a moonsault. It’s back to Harris as everything breaks down, with Storm hitting a reverse tornado DDT. Harris’ northern lights suplex is enough for the pin at 5:19.

Rating: C. This was the latest win for Harris and Storm, who are rising up the ranks rather quickly. Well as many ranks as you can have so soon in a company’s history. You can tell there is a chemistry there and that is something that can take them a rather long way. The match was nothing of note though, as the Hot Shots just didn’t have much going on.

Post match the Hot Shots jump them from behind for the beatdown.

Ken Shamrock wants Jeff Jarrett.

Apolo vs. Brian Lawler

Thankfully Lawler doesn’t get to talk before he slams Apolo go start. Apolo is back up with a slam of his own and Lawler is not pleased. A Sky High gives Apollo two so Lawler goes back to the Memphis playbook with a foreign object. Some choking on the ropes keeps Apolo in trouble and a middle rope dropkick makes it worse. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Apolo is back up with a running shoulder. The legdrop gives Apolo two but the TKO is countered into a reverse DDT. Lawler, with his mouth bleeding, stops to dance…and is promptly rolled up for the pin at 7:06.

Rating: C. Again, Lawler just isn’t much in the ring and that hasn’t changed no matter what he’s been doing. That kind of style works in a place like the old Memphis territory and there is nothing wrong with it, but it’s not working here. Throw in the fact that he was just Grandmaster Sexay about a year ago and still acts the same way and it’s not exactly clicking. At least he wasn’t ranting about Jerry Lawler for once, as that isn’t working in the slightest.

Post match Lawler beats up Don West because that’s what a villain should do. There is still no security but Lawler lets him go anyway.

Here is K-Krush and we get a montage of him hanging…well actually just Norman Smiley and Scott Hall. Back in the arena, Krush talks about how he doesn’t want to go by this name because THEY gave it to him. He is being held down by THEY in the back before talking about Allen Iverson (he’s wearing an Iverson jersey) and says that like Iverson, he’s the TRUTH.

After talking about Mike Tyson and OJ Simpson, Money Brown (to what would become Abyss’ music) interrupts to brag about his own football career. Krush can blame everyone he wants, but maybe he’s just not all that. The challenge is issued but Truth (seems to be his official name) isn’t interested. The brawl is on and Brown easily clears him out.

We recap the issues between AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn. They hate each other but work well together, which is why they’re still Tag Team Champions. A lot of brawling has ensued.

We get a sitdown interview between Styles and Lynn from earlier today and, after the video doesn’t work the first time, they talk about how they still don’t get along. Tonight, they have to get together to retain the Tag Team Titles.

Tag Team Titles: AJ Styles/Jerry Lynn vs. Flying Elvises

The Elvises are challenging and Sonny Siaki is on commentary. Lynn and Estrada trade arm control to start until until Lynn elbows him in the face and grabs a running headscissors. Styles adds a running knee to the face and a legdrop gets two. An elbow to the jaw gives Styles two more but Estrada gets in a slam, allowing the rather necessary tag off to Yang.

Lynn comes back in to knock Yang into the corner, setting up a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. What looks like a top rope cutter from Styles…just kind of crashes down and Yang sends him outside for a heck of a clothesline. Back in and a Koji Clutch keeps Styles in trouble, setting up Estrada’s knee to the ribs for two. The banged up ribs are dropped over the top rope for two and a Lionsault connects for the same.

Another rather slow motion knee drop into a slingshot hilo gets two next two, followed by the logical abdominal stretch. Styles tries to fight back but Lynn gets knocked off the apron so the beating can continue. A kick to the face gets Styles out of trouble though and it’s back to Lynn to clean house. Lynn dives onto Estrada but Styles accidentally takes Lynn out with a dive of his own. Lynn is VERY busted open but he’s fine enough to come back with the slingshot Fameasser over the ropes. That’s enough to pin Estrada, even as Styles is on top for the Spiral Tap, and retain at 15:24.

Rating: B. Well hokey smoke, a wrestling match broke out on this show. It really shouldn’t be any surprise that Styles and Lynn work this well together as they’re incredibly talented but at the same time the Elvises are right there with him to make their side work. This was a rather good match and one of the better things the promotion has produced so far.

And now, Glenn Gilbertti has a talk show. After referencing Joey Maggs, Gilbertti talks about how much success he has had, all while commentary WILL NOT SHUT UP about how Gilbertti isn’t a star, continuing to completely undermine the entire joke. Anyway, Gilbertti is help AJ Styles be more athletic, show Ken Shamrock how to be charismatic, and Tennessee how to be smart. Next week, it’s the debut of Jive Talkin. Just in case we didn’t have enough comedy acts.

Ken Shamrock and the muscular guy….are cut off by a camera cut.

Simon Diamond/Johnny Swinger vs. Monty Brown/Elix Skipper

Skipper kicks away at Diamond to start and it’s off to brown for a Flip, Flop And Fly of all things. Swinger gets a clothesline from the apron to take over on Skipper and some rolling suplexes into a gordbuster gets two. Skipper gets in a shot to the face though and it’s Brown coming in to clean house. Diamond drops Brown from behind but a quick Alpha Bomb gives Brown the pin at 5:34.

Rating: C. Yeah I think they know what they have here with Brown, as he’s such a ball of charisma and an athletic freak on top of that. You don’t get someone like that very often and TNA would be smart to push him even harder. Other than that, Diamond and Swinger are good choices to put out there as designated victims as they work well together.

Post match The Truth comes in to jump Brown and choke him out.

The Dupps don’t have a match tonight but intentionally bump into Goldilocks, which is supposed to set up a match. Instead Bo goes after the muscular guy and a match is made.

Bo Dupp vs. Ian Harrison

Stan Dupp is on commentary as the rather big Harrison powers Bo into the corner. A suplex gives Bo a breather but Harrison easily slams him down. Some forearms just annoy Harrison, who comes back with a powerslam for the pin….despite the referee looking confused, at 2:59. Or was it a DQ when Stan ran in? Not that it matters as the Dupps are done for the night and that’s a good thing.

Post match the Dupps go after Harrison, who clears them out with ease. Harrison was every generic monster power wrestler you can imagine. Great physique, but nothing that is going to seem interesting.

With Harrison in the ring, Ken Shamrock and Jeff Jarrett can finally brawl. It’s broken up just as fast.

We get a pretty long recap of Sabu beating Malice in a ladder match to become the new #1 contender.

NWA World Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Sabu

Shamrock is defending and hits him in the face to start. Commentary explains that to even this out, it is Ladder vs. Submission, which means Shamrock has to win by submission and Sabu has to win by climbing a ladder to get the belt (because of course they have to make this more complicated). Sabu grabs a kneebar, suggesting that he can win by submission as well, only for Shamrock to fight out and kick him in the head.

Shamrock is back with a kneebar of his own as we’re told that Ricky Steamboat will be in charge next week. Sabu’s armbar is reversed into a kneebar, with Sabu getting to the ropes. Sabu gets knocked outside where he grabs a ladder, which is kicked into his face. They fight up to the stage for a few seconds before Shamrock is sent through the barricade.

Shamrock is laid onto a table but Sabu takes too long setting up a dive, meaning he only hits table. Now Shamrock gets to go up (as Ladder vs. Submission is already getting confusing) and grabs the belt…but the lights go out. Cue Malice to chokeslam Shamrock off the ladder and grab the belt, which makes the bell ring at 9:31.

Rating: D. They had some hard hitting stuff in there, but when commentary can’t explain the rules, it might be proof that they don’t nee to be there. The idea of ladder vs. submission only makes so much sense in the first place, as there was no reason to change it from being anything other than a regular match. And then the ending is someone pulling the title down because…I have no idea what is going on in this whole thing.

Overall Rating: C+. Things might be inching in the right direction here as there was enough focus on the better, more interesting things. At the same time, there are still enough bad things (submission vs. ladder, the Dupps, Gilbertti’s talk show, anything with Lawler and more) to hold it down. I’m certainly not optimistic, but things could be a lot worse.

 

 

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NWA-TNA Weekly PPV #5 (2024 Edition): They Need To Focus

NWA TNA Weekly PPV #5
Date: July 17, 2002
Location: Nashville Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

We’re back for another batch of these things and the promotion is not in good shape. Save for the X-Division, the shows are just not very good and there isn’t much of a way around it. Ken Shamrock isn’t an interesting World Champion and Brian Christopher is still getting a lot of attention for whatever reason. Then there’s Jeff Jarrett, and I mean a lot of Jeff Jarrett, on top of everything else. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Jeff Jarrett going all nuts and attacking Ken Shamrock with a chair last week.

Shamrock doesn’t have any comment but he’s ready to show how mad he is.

Opening sequence.

Scott Hall and Jeff Jarrett, the latter of whom is ready to be in a ladder match for the #1 contendership to the World Title, brawl in the back and fight outside. The fight is broken up and executive Bill Behrens says Jarrett has forfeited his spot in the match.

Here is Malice (Jarrett’s scheduled opponent) with Father James Mitchell, so it’s open challenge time for the #1 contenders ladder match. The lights go out and….let’s get this over with as fast as we can.

Malice vs. Sabu

Ladder match for the #1 contenders match and Sabu starts fast with a tornado DDT. Malice isn’t having that and chokes him down before grabbing a chair. A backbreaker plants Sabu again and Malice sends him face first into a chair in the corner. It’s time to get the ladder, which Sabu dropkicks into Malice’s face. The triple jump dive to the floor drops Malice again before bridging the ladder between the apron and the barricade.

That takes way too long though and Malice drops him onto the ladder, followed by a World’s Strongest Slam onto it as well. Naturally Sabu is right back up with a springboard leg lariat into the ladder into Malice for another knockdown. It’s way too early to get the contract though as Malice powerbombs him down, followed by a nasty overhead belly to belly into the ladder.

Malice goes up but Sabu dropkicks the ladder out and chairs him in the head. Sabu kind of bulldogs the ladder down onto Malice, who is right back with a spinebuster. Malice’s climb up the ladder is cut off with a shove through a table, allowing Sabu to pull down the contract and win at 13:29.

Rating: C+. This could have been worse, as Sabu could still move and fits in far better with this kind of carnage than a regular match. If nothing else it adds a bit of a spark, as Sabu is a big enough name to be slotted into the World Title scene, even if it is for the short term. Besides, Malice’s time in the title scene has already been wrapped up so it is time to see someone new get a shot.

Post match the Disciples of the New Church come in to beat on Sabu and a super chokeslam puts him through a table.

Jeff Jarrett and Scott Hall are still being held apart and Jarrett is ejected.

Here’s AJ Styles for an unscheduled chat. Styles calls out Jerry Lynn, who storms to the ring and says Styles must want to know why Lynn jumped him last week. Lynn says he’s been wrestling for fourteen years and done more in this business than Styles has done in his lifetime.

Styles hasn’t done anything or even had to sleep in his car eating peanut butter sandwiches. Lynn gave him a chance when they teamed up and he isn’t going to stand for the disrespect. Styles lays him out and hits the Styles Clash. This was fine and to the point, but commentary responding to EVERYTHING either of them said took away a lot of the impact.

We look back at Jasmin St. Clair stripping for Jeremy Borash and Ed Ferrara making sure it happened in a funny bit.

Francine jumps St. Clair in the back and throws her in the shower.

K-Krush vs. Norman Smiley

Before the match, Krush brags about star power (he even SMELLS like a star). Why did the NWA put him in the ring with a NASCAR driver? They were afraid he was going to become something they couldn’t control and then they would have to sell his t-shirts. He’s been treated as a second class citizen despite being better than everyone. It’s because he’s a Black man, and he’s the truth.

With that out of the way, Krush knocks Smiley down into the corner but Smiley is back with the swinging slam. The Big Wiggle into a faceplant plants Krush again but he hits a spinning forearm to cut that off. Back up and a Russian legsweep gets Smiley out of trouble but Krush plants him with a sitout gordbuster for the win at 3:25.

Rating: C-. This really didn’t work, mainly because they went from a rather serious promo from Krush into something totally goofy, which is all Smiley did at this point. Smiley did have some status, but you probably shouldn’t be having the Big Wiggle after someone went on a rant about how he was being held back because of his face. Krush should have squashed him, but maybe don’t let Smiley get in that much goofy stuff.

Post match Krush takes off his belt and whips Smiley before hanging him over the top. Smiley’s wife comes out for the save and gets choked as well. This isn’t going to go well and it wasn’t exactly comfortable stuff anyway.

Puppet is in a trashcan and all annoyed about his match with Meatball. It’s implied that he is, uh, doing something rather personal with his hand.

The Dupps are all weird and make inappropriate comments about Goldilocks.

Flying Elvises vs. Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper

Estrada is sent outside to start and Skipper hits a quick dive. Back in and Siaki takes over on Skipper before it’s back to Estrada for a butterfly suplex. Siaki joins commentary for a second to brag about how awesome he is before stomping away back inside. Estrada comes in with a double springboard moonsault but Skipper gets over for the tag to Daniels.

A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two on Estrada but Siaki’s cheap shot from the floor lets Estrada get in a quick knockdown. Skipper comes back in as everything breaks down, with Estrada hitting a springboard moonsault. Daniels hits a much less springboardy but far better moonsault for two of his own. Siaki and Daniels fight to the floor, meaning there’s no count off Skipper’s Play Of The Day. Instead Siaki comes back in for a rolling cutter to finish Skipper at 9:50.

Rating: C+. This was a fast paced tag match with the Elvises stealing the win over the rather talented Daniels/Skipper team. The tag division is still coming together and it is kind of hard to make that work. Putting teams together work though and this is the kind of match you have to use to make that work.

Post match the Dupps run in to take out the Elvises.

Scott Hall jumps K-Krush and leaves him laying without much trouble.

Meatball vs. Puppet

Hardcore match and Puppet jumps him to start, setting up a ram into a trashcan. Meatball knocks him to the floor though and it’s an ax handle from the apron. The fight heads up towards the entrance, where Meatball pulls some food from a shopping cart to mess Puppet up a bit. A dropkick sends a chair into Meatball’s face and a DDT gives Puppet two. Puppet hits a middle rope Fameasser onto a chair and a Vader Bomb onto a chair onto Meatball is good for the pin at 6:16.

Rating: D-. Oh come on. This was stupid, it wasn’t funny, the whole thing went on too long and this whole deal feels like such a waste of time. I’m sure someone gets a kick out of this but it’s just not working, with the gag of Puppet being a hardcore wrestler having lost the charm which barely existed in the first place. Just find something else to fill in the time.

Here is a damaged Jasmin St. Clair to call out Francine.

Francine vs. Jasmin St. Clair

It’s a brawl to start, they both lose clothes, Blue Meanie comes in to DDT Francine for the DQ at 1:25. This was all about the clothes and nothing more.

Meanie carries St. Clair off and Francine is taken out on a stretcher.

We look at some of Low Ki’s and AJ Styles’ signature moves.

X-Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Low Ki

Ki is challenging and they wrestle to the mat to start. Back up and they chop it out to a standoff until Ki takes him down. Ki strikes away as fans look at someone holding a sign, with security seemingly going after him. Styles gets in a slam and a flipping splash but Ki knees him to the apron.

Ki misses an Asai moonsault but he’s able to kick Styles in the face to cut off a dive. They slug it out on the apron until Ki gets a dragon sleeper in the ropes. Styles uses said ropes to escape and grabs a brainbuster for two. The Spiral Tap misses but Styles reverses a fireman’s carry into a Death Valley Driver for a needed breather. It’s Ki going up but he dives into the Styles Clash to retain Styles’ title at 10:36.

Rating: B-. These two work well together and that shouldn’t be a surprise given how well they have done in previous matches. It wasn’t exactly an epic showdown or a classic match, but they were working hard and it didn’t feel like two old rejects from WCW. Styles continues to be the breakout star around here and that is likely to continue if he’s going to keep doing this well.

Post match Jerry Lynn spears Styles down and gives him he piledriver. A ladder is brought in and Lynn suplexes him into it for the nasty crash.

Scott Hall vs. Brian Lawler

Before the match, Lawler rants about how stupid people have to be to be Jerry Lawler fans. The challenge is issued again and Brian throws in some Jim Ross insults for a bonus. Hall sneaks up behind him and after even more ranting from Brian, Hall finally punches him down to get going. Some right hands send Brian outside and even more knock him off th announcers’ table.

The beating goes around ringside until Brian gets in a shot of his own to take over. Back in and Brian hammers away as there are an awful lot of empty seats on camera. A suplex gives Brian two and, after insulting the fans some more, he goes up but gets slammed off the top. Hall’s belly to back superplex connects and, after taking out K-Krush, the Outsider’s Edge finishes Brian at 8:43.

Rating: C-. At the end of the day, these matches just aren’t very good. They’re a bunch of punching, a few other moves, and then the finish. It doesn’t help when Brian is doing basic heel stuff straight out of the Memphis playbook, but that is only going to do so much to get him around the fact that he’s Brian Lawler and won’t shut up about his dad. Hall didn’t do much more than his signature stuff, which is only so good at this point.

Post match Brian and Krush beat Hall down and hang him over the ropes.  Hall goes out on a stretcher but Jeff Jarrett runs in with a chair and wrecks Hall and pretty much everyone not named Lawler or Krush.

Overall Rating: C. There is some passable stuff on here but the bad is dragging it all the way down. Other than that, the good stuff, which is mainly centered around the less goofy people, is watchable enough. In other words, as has been the case, there is a decent show here if you get rid of the terrible parts. The problem is there is quite a bit of terrible and a lot of it is getting the focus. Fix that and this goes up in value, but it isn’t looking likely anytime soon. Ultimately, the biggest issue is that I have no idea what the biggest story is supposed to be around here and I don’t think the company does either.

 

 

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Unforgiven 1999 (2024 Edition): All The Eggs In One Cell

Unforgiven 1999
Date: September 26, 1999
Location: Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 15,779
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

After going through a bunch of television with all of the fast matches that rarely have a chance to make an impact, it’s going to be a bit weird to see things getting time. The main event is a Six Pack Challenge with a bunch of main eventers and the British Bulldog fighting for the WWF Title, with Steve Austin as guest referee. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how it all comes to tonight as everyone wanted to avoid being unforgiven.

The referees are still on strike so we have scab referees for the show.

Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman

Venis brings the bag of weapons with him, having recently stolen them. Blackman strikes away to start but Venis kicks him into the corner and gets in some choking. A missed elbow lets Blackman knock him to the floor, with a suplex bringing Venis back in. They’re already back on the floor with Venis being sent into the steps as commentary talks about the main event.

Back in and Blackman whips him hard into the corner and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Venis fights up with some elbows. Lawler: “Starting to rise. To the occasion.” JR: “He’s done that for money.” Back up and Blackman’s crossbody is rolled through for two, with referee Steve Lombardi counting at the feet. Venis knocks him down again and hits the Money Shot for the clean pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t worth much of a watch and I’m not sure why they thought it was a feud that needed to have a pay per view match. The whole deal is that Val isn’t overly serious while Blackman is ultra series and….conflict? Just nothing to see but a long TV match and not exactly interesting.

Post match Venis grabs a kendo stick but Blackman takes it away and knocks him cold. Cue the medics, with Blackman yelling at a female nurse. The male security guard tackles Blackman, who leaves rather quickly.

Big Show says he has a killer instinct and will win the title.

We recap Mark Henry defending the European Title against D’Lo Brown. Henry was overweight and Brown tried to get him in better shape. Henry would rather have women and food though, along with the belt. Now Brown wants revenge and the title as well.

Mark Henry hits on Lilian Garcia and gets slapped in the face.

European Title: Mark Henry vs. D’Lo Brown

Henry is defending….in theory, as he says there isn’t going to be a title match tonight. After sending his two women to start the car, Henry says he has a “brainerism” after that slap. Maybe we can do this tomorrow on Raw, but cue Brown to interrupt. They start brawling on the floor and head inside, where the bell rings to officially get things going.

Brown manages a rather impressive Sky High for two, followed by a legdrop for the same. Henry misses a running charge at the ropes and takes a kind of scary crash out to the floor. The big no hands dive (that looked nice) takes Henry down again and a high crossbody gets two back inside.

A big clothesline drops Brown and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Brown comes back with a crossbody before countering another into a slam (I wonder if the first wasn’t as planned.). The big leg gives Henry two but Brown slips through his legs and grabs a hurricanrana for a double knockdown. Back up and Henry hammers away in the corner, only to get powerbombed down. The Low Down gives Brown the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. Oh this wasn’t working and that was very clear. Henry looked awkward and unsure of himself, along with just slow. Brown was doing what he could and was trying but he could only do so much on his own. Bad match, and while Henry is good in segments, the matches aren’t working.

The Acolytes are ready for the Dudley Boyz and just because one of them is white and one of them is Black, that’s where the similarities end. We pause this to see some people beating up Chaz and throwing him out of the locker room. Why was Chaz here if he doesn’t have a match?

Debra isn’t happy with Jeff Jarrett for putting her in the Figure Four but Jarrett doesn’t want to hear it, grabs Miss Kitty and leaves.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Chyna

Jarrett, with Miss Kitty, is defending and is convinced that no woman could ever beat a man. He’s also gone rather nuts and attacked the legs of various women with the Figure Four. Jarrett starts fast but misses a running crotch attack on the ropes. A hard clothesline puts Jarrett down and another one knocks him out to the floor. Jarrett pulls the legs out though and crotches her against the post, with the pain surprising Lawler.

Commentary talks about the women Jarrett has hurt, which has Lawler chuckling, as Jarrett gets two off a high crossbody. A nice dropkick hits Chyna and a superplex into a not great small package gets two. Jarrett hits a DDT onto the arm so he goes up top, only to get electric chaired down. Moolah and Mae Young are worried in the front row as Chyna fights out of a sleeper and grabs a suplex (better than Jarrett’s normal sleeper sequence) to leave them down again.

A powerslam and powerbomb give Jarrett two but he’s back with a powerbomb of his own. They go outside where Chyna hits him with a chair, with Lawler losing his mind over how that isn’t a DQ. Back in and the Pedigree is countered into a catapult to crush referee Harvey Wippleman. The guitar is thrown in….so Moolah and Mae Young run in to beat the fire out of Jarrett, including a double slam.

The crowd goes NUTS, only to be cut off as Jarrett hits a double clothesline. Jarrett loads up the Figure Four but here is Debra with a heck of a guitar shot to knock him cold. Chyna gets the pin and the title….but head scab referee Tom Prichard comes in to reverse the decision.

Rating: C. They were trying here and Jarrett was able to carry Chyna to something watchable enough. It’s pretty clear that the big blowoff is still coming with Jarrett getting what is coming to him, so hopefully they can do a bit better than this one in the rematch. That being said, the highlight here was definitely Moolah and Mae, as they beat the fire out of Jarrett for a bit and made it work. It worked and was hilarious at the same time, which is hard to do.

Post match Chyna Pedigrees Prichard to blow off some steam.

Steve Austin promises a new WWF Champion tonight.

Acolytes vs. Dudley Boyz

It’s a brawl to start as Jimmy Korderas has crossed the picket line so we have a regular referee. D-Von gets knocked down on the floor, leaving Bubba to get caught with a double flapjack. A superplex gives Bradshaw two as Lawler makes a bunch of jokes about Moolah and Mae Young. Bubba is knocked outside and whipped hard into the steps but he’s back in with a belly to belly.

It’s back to D-Von for a running neckbreaker but the fall away slam sends him flying. Faarooq can’t hit the Dominator so it’s back to Bradshaw, who gets caught in the reverse 3D for another near fall. D-Von hits his top rope headbutt, only for Bradshaw to pop up and catch him on top with a belly to back superplex (and a nice one at that). A quick 3D connects…but Stevie Richards comes in dressed as an Acolyte (with the UPN logo on his chest) to superkick D-Von for the pin.

Rating: C+. Not a bad power tag match as the Acolytes could still go well enough. I’m not sure about beating the hot new team in the Dudleys but at least there was some interference. The Dudleys are still trying to find their groove around here, but the 3D is such an awesome finisher that they’re already off to a good start.

Post match the Acolytes beat Richards down.

Women’s Title: Luna vs. Ivory

Ivory is defending in a Hardcore match and they start fighting in the back. Luna throws a TV at Ivory, makes photocopies of her face, and throws a phone at her before sending her into some walls. Ivory is back with a toss into a trashcan for…well no count as her shoulders aren’t down, but if falls count anywhere, shouldn’t they count in a place with her shoulders not down?

I guess a fall has to include shoulders down to be counted as a fall, but the technical aspect is broken up by Luna splashing her off a forklift for two. Cue Tori to take a swing at Ivory but she gets knocked into an anvil case. Ivory hits Luna with a pole for the pin to retain. Tori added nothing here.

Rating: C-. Well, Ivory gets to retain and Tori was kind of there as well, but this was little more than a segment described as a match. They were doing the usual hardcore stuff but backstage, which doesn’t leave them with much to do. Rather dull again, which is rapidly becoming the norm with these hardcore based match.

Moolah and Mae Young want Jeff Jarrett to stay out of their business but Ivory runs in to say stay out of her business. That earns Ivory another beating.

Tag Team Titles: Edge and Christian vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws are defending. Gunn powers Edge into the corner to start but Edge is back out with a takedown into a headlock. Dogg comes in for a headlock of his own but Christian comes in off a blind tag for a dropkick. That doesn’t last long as it’s Gunn coming in for some ax handles to the back, plus a gorilla press onto Dogg’s knee for a near fall. Christian gets up and hands it back to Edge, who gets punched in the face a few times.

The slow pace continues with Dogg being knocked outside and sent into the steps to put the Canadians in control for the first time. The chinlock goes on before Dogg and Christian hit stereo crossbodies. Dogg still can’t get over to Gunn so we’ll go with some stomping in the corner instead. A side slam/layout reverse DDT combination gives Christian two as JR is getting into Edge and Christian’s rapid tagging.

Dogg finally manages a double DDT and everyone but Gunn is down. The diving tag brings Gunn in to clean house with a powerslam getting two on Christian. The reverse layout DDT gets Christian out o trouble but cue Gangrel and Matt Hardy to pull Christian to the floor. Jeff Hardy adds a dropkick to Edge and the Fameasser retains the titles.

Rating: B. I wouldn’t have expected this to be the match of the night so far but they pulled it off here. The Outlaws weren’t known as being the most polished team ever but they worked really well together and that was on display here. The same was true of Edge and Christian, who were pretty clearly wanting to work hard in a big spot, which was pretty much the norm for them.

HHH and British Bulldog won’t say if they’re together or not but they’ll do what it takes to win tonight.

Big Boss Man doesn’t regret anything he’s done to Al Snow because he’s used to dealing with people inside a cage, dogs or not.

The Cell is lowered and the cage is built.

Al Snow is going to beat up the Big Boss Man for Pepper’s memory.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

Snow is defending and this is the Kennel From Hell match, meaning there’s a regular cage and the Cell around it, with rottweilers in between the two cages. It’s the old story: Boss Man wanted to be Hardcore Champion and cooked Snow’s dog and fed it to him as a result. There are no dogs to start (uh oh) and only Snow is in the cage. That leaves Boss Man between the cage and the Cell as the dogs come out.

We’re nearly two minutes in as the dogs are finally brought inside, where one of them immediately relieves himself. Boss Man climbs the cage but Snow hits it with a shovel to avoid getting inside. The dogs start arguing with each other as Snow drops to the floor, where he climbs the Cell despite the dogs not chasing him.

Snow manages to get onto the regular cage wall but Boss Man catches him on top for a superplex inside, meaning they’re both inside the ring for the first time about three and a half minutes in. The dogs keep barking at each other as Boss Man sends Snow into the cage. The slow beating continues, with Boss Man hitting him in the head with a cookie sheet a few times.

With Snow down (and bleeding), Boss Man grabs a pair of pliers to try and cut open the top. The dogs have at least stopped barking as Boss man has ripped open part of the Cell’s roof. A low blow brings Boss Man back down but he drops Snow with a shot to the face. It’s time for powder, which is knocked into the Boss Man’s eyes, as the dogs have been forgotten or the time being. Snow hits him in the head to bust Boss Man open as well and there’s a shovel shot to his back.

The dogs are looking at each other as Snow starts to unhook a turnbuckle. Snow can’t get one of the dogs to bite Boss Man’s arm so Boss Man hits Snow in the head with a nasty shovel shot (JR: “OH MAN! Ok that’ll be enough.”). Boss Man cuffs Snow to the turnbuckle as JR explains that you have to escape to win.

If that was mentioned before, it wasn’t exactly emphasized. Snow breaks the cuffs to escape and catches Boss Man trying to go through the ceiling. The dogs have been a complete non-factor and barely seen for about seven minutes now so Snow hits Boss Man with Head. Snow goes outside, climbs the Cell, and kicks the door open to retain as Boss Man gets out through the roof.

Rating: F. What in the world is there to say here? There are bad matches where you can see some kind of an idea that might have worked if something went well, but that was in no way shape or form the case here. I have no idea how this got green lit to be on the show, but it wasn’t exactly wrestling, it wasn’t exactly a hardcore match, it wasn’t exactly a cage match and it wasn’t exactly a Cell match.

The dogs were a total non factor and that isn’t a surprise as they aren’t likely trained television performers, so there was only so much they could do. This is just such a chase of wondering how no one stopped this in the setup process, as multiple people were apparently convinced this was a good idea. Absolutely all time awful match (a word I use loosely), but above all else I’m more interested in how we got here, because it should never have happened.

Mankind is going into the main event but is ready to take out the Rock if necessary.

Chris Jericho vs. X-Pac

This was added on Heat (as Ken Shamrock is gone) and Curtis Hughes is here with Jericho. The cage is still being taken down as Jericho makes his entrance so we get a lot of vamping. Before the match, Jericho says he’s here to save Charlotte and this boring, brutal pay per view by giving everyone what they really wanted to see: him! We actually get to the match and they go technical to start with neither getting very far.

Back up and X-Pac scores with some kicks so Jericho fires off the chops. The big kick misses for X-Pac and Jericho drops him with a clothesline. A missed charge lets X-Pac kick him down in the corner but X-Pac has to put the brakes on with the Bronco Buster. Jericho is knocked outside, where X-Pac’s big dive mostly hits the floor for the nasty crash. Back in and Jericho hits a nice missile dropkick, setting up the double arm crank.

That’s broken up so Jericho goes with a backbreaker to put him down again. The fans get distracted by something in the crowd as Jericho hits a slingshot splash for two (that one didn’t stick) and we hit the chinlock as the crowd calms down. Jericho hits the Lionsault and hammers away as the fans are STILL distracted (Geez how drunk was that fan?). The triangle dropkick sends X-Pac outside where Hughes gets in a cheap shot, as any good bodyguard should.

Back in and one heck of a spinwheel kick gives X-Pac a breather, allowing him to dive onto Hughes. Jericho gets dropped for two but manages a low blow to cut off the Bronco Buster. They go up top with X-Pac hitting a superplex for two, only to get caught with the double powerbomb for a rather delayed two. Jericho goes up but gets pulled down but this time X-Pac ties him in the Tree Of Woe for the Bronco Buster. That’s enough for Jericho as he decks the referee for the DQ.

Rating: B-. For a thrown together match, this could have been much worse, with the crowd distraction causing a big problem. They were able to stall long enough to avoid things getting out of hand and that’s a sign of people who know what they’re doing. I can get why X-Pac didn’t lose clean here, though Jericho absolutely feels like one of the hottest things in the company and a win would have suited everything a bit better.

Post match the double beating is on but Road Dogg runs in for the save.

We recap the Six Pack Challenge and here’s the short version: Mankind wins title, HHH wins title, everyone hates HHH, Vince wins title, Vince vacates title, HHH runs gimmick gauntlet, multiple gimmicks wasted in one night, six people fight for the title, British Bulldog doesn’t belong here.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Kane vs. Big Show vs. Mankind vs. The Rock vs. British Bulldog

For the vacant title, one fall to a finish, Kane has the awesome inverted gear, HHH is here with Chyna, and Steve Austin is the outside referee. Austin actually sits in on commentary and thankfully we have tags, meaning Rock and Bulldog start things off. Rock hammers him down into the corner but Bulldog gets in a quick shot, allowing HHH to come in and beat Rock down on the ropes.

A hot shot gets Rock out of trouble for two and it’s off to Kane, who misses an elbow as commentary argues over whether Jimmy Korderas is a scab referee. Show shoves Kane off the top as Austin says he doesn’t quite understand the concept here, despite it not being that complicated. Kane comes back in to drop Mankind with a clothesline but Mankind hits some running kicks, allowing Austin to make some dropkick jokes.

It’s back to Show, who gets enziguried out to the floor but he’s back in to superkick Kane. The rapid fire changes continue as Bulldog hits Rock low, which Austin says he can appreciate. The non-delayed suplex puts Rock down and it’s off to Mankind, who immediately tags out to Kane. Mankind comes right back in for a Texas piledriver to Kane for two but HHH comes in. That’s fine with Mankind, who sends him out into the steps and everything breaks down, with all six brawling up the aisle.

Mankind hits another Texas piledriver and sends HHH into the steps but Bulldog is right on him back inside. Kane beats on Rock on the floor as we settle down to Mankind stomping Bulldog in the corner. Mankind tags Rock in, with both JR and Austin not getting the thinking. Show comes in to kick Kane down and here are the rest of the referees to yell at Jimmy Korderas.

It’s back to Mankind as Austin has to get the other two commentators back on the match. The big elbow gives Show two, with Rock making the save. HHH and Rock fight to the floor with Rock stealing Austin’s beer for a drink. Back in and Kane Tombstones Mankind but Show tags himself in, only to get hit with the top rope clothesline. Bulldog powerslams Kane but gets Pedigreed for his efforts. Rock takes out HHH but gets DDTed by Mankind, setting up the Mandible Claw (Austin: “I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT!”).

The Mandible Claw is reversed into the Rock Bottom for two with HHH making the save this time. Show comes in to clean house and hits the chokeslam on Mankind but the other referees pull Korderas out and beat him up for crossing the picket lines. Austin beats up the referees and comes back in to count Rock’s two on HHH, with the fans going nuts. The Rock Bottom hits HHH but Show pulls Austin out. Back in and Bulldog chairs Rock into the Pedigree before Austin chairs Bulldog. Austin has to count the pin to make HHH the champion.

Rating: B. It was a fun match and the referee thing (as unnecessary as it was) did tie into the ending, with Austin already being set up as the first challenger, but there was just so much going on here. That’s a problem with just about everything going on in the company at the moment and the main event was no exception. Thank goodness for the tags here as it could have been even worse. Things also took their time to get going, but the ending was rather good with all of the big stars going nuts until the finish. Just calm down a bit more and let some things breathe.

Post match HHH yells at Austin, who lays him out with a Stunner to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The main event and the Tag Team Title match are good, but they’re not enough to carry a weak undercard and an all time mess of a Kennel match. The problem with having so many of the big stars in one match was clear here, as it didn’t leave much else for everyone to do. There are worse shows out there, but this was not a good one and is absolutely not worth a look, even with a few nice matches.

 

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Smackdown – September 23, 1999: Six Pack Of Gimmicks

Smackdown
Date: September 23, 1999
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,348
Commentators: Michael Hayes, Michael Cole

It’s the last show before Unforgiven and things got a bit more interesting on Raw, as Vince McMahon made the main event of the pay per view for the vacant title. HHH will be involved as well, with Steve Austin as the referee to stack the odds even higher. Other than that, Jeff Jarrett is still a woman hating psycho so we’ll probably get more from him. Let’s get to it.

Here is Raw is you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon, who wastes no time in introducing HHH, naturally with Chyna. Vince brags about being back in charge, and if what he did to HHH on Monday was a headache, tonight will be a migraine. This Sunday, HHH will be facing five opponents at once, but tonight he’ll be facing all of them again , but one on one. And on top of that, we’ll have a special stipulation for each:

The Rock – Brahma Bull Rope Match

Undertaker – Casket Match

Mankind – Boiler Room Brawl

Kane – Inferno Match

Big Show – Chokeslam Challenge

Now, HHH doesn’t have to win all of the matches to keep his spot in the Six Pack Challenge, but he does have to win 3/5. And we’ll start here.

HHH vs. Big Show

Chokeslam Challenge, meaning you win by chokeslamming your opponent. Show fires off some headbutts to start but HHH slugs away in the corner. That earns him a heck of a chop but Show misses a charge. HHH tries a chokeslam, which goes as well as you would expect, with Show hitting one of his own for the win.

HHH: 0-1

Post match Show chokeslams him again and tries a third but a Chyna distraction is enough for the save.

The referees were on strike earlier today when the Dudley Boyz came in and beat them up.

Chris Jericho is ready to prove how dangerous he is tonight by making Ken Shamrock bleed. Just don’t get it on his clothes. That’s because they have a first blood match, because when HHH is in FIVE GIMMICK MATCHES, we need a sixth.

European Title: X-Pac vs. Mark Henry

X-Pac is challenging and here is D’Lo Brown to join commentary. X-Pac strikes away to start and is quickly launched into the air for a crash down onto the mat. The bearhug is broken up but the Bronco Buster misses. Henry hits a splash in the corner but misses an elbow, with Brown saying that’s why Henry needs to lose weight. X-Pac kicks away and hits the Bronco Buster before knocking Henry out to the floor…for the countout.

Rating: C. X-Pac can do the hit and run offense rather well and this was just believable enough to work. There wasn’t exactly much of a reason to believe that the title would change hands here as Brown vs. Henry is already set but this could have been far worse. If nothing else, at least it wasn’t a pinfall before a title match like Test pinning Jeff Jarrett on Raw.

Luna wants the Women’s Title.

Here is Jeff Jarrett, with Miss Kitty, for a chat. Jarrett introduces himself to the fans, which they should probably know if he’s the Intercontinental Champion, before saying Debra didn’t know her place and that’s why she’s injured. A stage manager asks Jarrett to wrap it up so Jarrett loads up the Figure Four. Cue Chyna with a frying pan to the head for the save, complete with Chyna giving him a soup ladle, frying pan and an apron. Then she steals his trunks and puts them on for a bonus. On Sunday, Jarrett will see who is wearing the pants and the title.

HHH vs. Kane

Inferno match and Chyna is here with HHH. Kane shrugs off the right hands to start but it’s too early to light HHH on fire. The facebuster and jumping knee to the face have Kane down, though not enough to light him on fire either. The Pedigree is blocked and Kane hits a chokeslam….but a bloody X-Pac is down on the stage. Undertaker, Mideon and Viscera show up as well so Kane dives over the fire onto the minions. A hard shot knocks Kane into the fire though and HHH wins.

Rating: D. So in one night, we’re not only burning through a bunch of gimmick matches, but also making them feel lame, as this was a three and a half minute match with interference. Kane vs. HHH in an Inferno Match is easily a pay per view level match, but here it is about 45 minutes into a Smackdown with no notice coming into the show. That’s Russo’s take on gimmick matches in a nutshell and it’s another big waste.

HHH: 1-1

Kane, with his hand still on fire, goes to check on X-Pac, which has to be some kind of a health hazard.

Post break and Kane is very upset at what happened to X-Pac.

Undertaker brags about hurting X-Pac and Kane as a result. With that, he’s ready to go, but Lilian Garcia brings up the casket match. Undertaker says that isn’t happening because Vince McMahon doesn’t order him to do anything. Vince pops in and says if he isn’t in the casket match, he’s not participating at Unforgiven either. Undertaker says maybe he won’t be participating in anything around here and walks away.

Here is the Rock for a chat. He doesn’t think too much of HHH bragging, but he does think something of the Dallas Stars in the front row. The Rock has asked to borrow the Stanley Cup (which the Stars won earlier in the year) for the purposes of personally violating HHH. Cue Mankind to interrupt, and while he doesn’t know who this Stanley guy is, but he has a cup (as in the protective kind) for the Rock, because we have to protect the People’s Jewels so we can have Rock Jr. one day.

Mankind thinks the people want to see the Boiler Room Brawl, because he is going to take a steel pipe, shine it up real nice, turn it sideways….and hit HHH right over the head with it! Cue Road Dogg to interrupt, saying no one wants to see the Boiler Room Brawl or the Brahma Bull Rope match. What people want to see is this, so here is Billy Gunn, as the Outlaws are back together. That sounds like a challenge, and Mankind says the Rock N Sock Connection is in.

Tag Team Titles: Rock N Sock Connection vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws are challenging and Gunn neckbreakers Mankind for two to start. Dogg comes in to hammer away but it’s off to Rock to do the same. Mankind adds the running knee and whips Dogg into the barricade. Back in and Dogg hammers on Rock, who drops him with a single punch.

The low blow has Dogg in more trouble and it’s back to Mankind (who was already in the ring when he was tagged). Everything breaks down and Gunn breaks up the Rock Bottom as Mankind was already posing. Mankind is sent into the ropes, where his knee gives out as he collides with Rock. The Fameasser gives Gunn the pin and the titles totally clean.

Rating: C. Not the smoothest match but it was nice to see something go down without all kinds of shenanigans. At the same time, it’s weird to see the Outlaws getting the big face pop for the reunion against the super team of Rock and Mankind. You usually wouldn’t put two face teams together like that, but 1999 and all that. It does help that Rock and Mankind had to do something before facing HHH, making things a bit more even.

The Outlaws hit their catchphrase as the team is back.

Vince McMahon swaps Mideon and Viscera in for Undertaker in the casket match.

HHH doesn’t care.

Al Snow is worried about someone being late and checks his watch, which he needs to get fixed as it’s running slow. Snow is not wearing a watch.

HHH vs. Mideon/Viscera

Casket Match and the rather busy Chyna is here with HHH as well. HHH slugs away to start but gets taken down, with Viscera’s splash hitting Mideon by mistake. Chyna gets in a low blow on Viscera so HHH hits a Pedigree each and throws Mideon in for the win. Or not actually, as Shane McMahon says HHH has to put BOTH of them in the casket at the same time. The double teaming is on again and some splashes crush HHH for the easy win. Not long enough to rate counting the Shane interference, but egads the overbooking is nuts on this show.

HHH: 1-2

Ivory agrees to face Luna in a hardcore match for the Women’s Title at Unforgiven.

Hardcore Holly vs. Al Snow

Hardcore match and Crash Holly is in Hardcore’s corner. Before the match, Hardcore says Al Snow owes him a favor for injuring Big Boss Man on Raw. Holly hammers away to start and hits a dropkick as commentary talks about everything else going on tonight. We see Big Boss Man tormenting the rottweilers in a car in the back, which fires Snow up. Snow takes out an invading Crash but walks into the Falcon Arrow for the fast pin.

Post match Big Boss Man runs in and feeds Al Snow dog food.

HHH vs. Mankind

Boiler Room Brawl, with the winner being the first person to escape as soon as the door is closed. For some reason HHH doesn’t just step right back outside, instead waiting for Mankind to charge at him and start the brawl. They hit each other with various things as HHH takes over, including hitting him with a big metal pole.

Mankind hits him in the back with a wooden stick but a whip into a transformer cuts him off. A suplex onto a bunch of bolts has Mankind in more trouble but instead of leaving, HHH misses a shot with a pipe. The Mandible Claw has HHH mostly out cold and Mankind goes to leave, only to stop and go for an elbow. Never mind that Foley would have had to jump 15 feet, but someone we can’t see shoves him off the platform for a crash (nowhere near HHH), allowing HHH to win.

Rating: D. Add it to the list of matches we had to rush through to get everything included on this show. This one didn’t exactly work because of the time (shocking) but also because the boiler room was rather cramped and they couldn’t do much. The big crash at the end looked good, but it was also pretty much given away because Foley would have been six feet short on a dive even if no one had pushed him.

HHH: 2-2

The British Bulldog is looking for Vince McMahon.

Ken Shamrock vs. Chris Jericho

First Blood and Jericho is in full Buffalo Sabers hockey gear, complete with a face mask. Shamrock strikes away to start before throwing him down by the mask a few times. A posting doesn’t do much good for Shamrock but Jericho is at least rather shaken up. Back in and Shamrock kicks him low before finally getting smart enough to take off the mask. Cue Curtis Hughes for a distraction, allowing Jericho to get in some hockey stick shots. A top rope splash makes Shamrock bleed internally to wrap it up. That would be it for Shamrock in WWE, as he loses a First Blood match in less than three minutes. Thrilling.

Vince McMahon meets with British Bulldog, who was promised a WWF Title shot. Works for Vince, who gives him Undertaker’s spot in the Six Pack Challenge. Bulldog is pleased, so he’ll be special referee for the Brahma Bull Rope match. Vince doesn’t quite get it but signs of anyway. Bulldog is a stretch for a pay per view main event but if Undertaker is hurt, it’s all they could do.

HHH vs. The Rock

Brahma Bull Rope match, meaning a strap match with pinfalls and submissions, British Bulldog is guest referee and HHH, with Chyna, has to win to stay in the Six Pack Challenge. Rock hammers away to start and they’re on the floor early on. Make that out into the crowd where the camera takes a second to catch up.

HHH gets the better of things before they go back to ringside, where Rock manages a whip into the steps for two on the floor, because this is apparently falls count anywhere. Back in and HHH knocks him down, setting up a low blow. Hold on though as Bulldog and HHH get into a fight, allowing Rock to punch HHH out to the floor again.

A DDT on the floor gets another near fall (because that’s a near fall in HHH’s fifth match of the night) and they fight up to the entrance. Cue Jeff Jarrett to hit Chyna in the back with a frying pan to knock her cold, setting up a Figure Four. Jarrett lets that go in a few seconds and leaves as the people actually in the match get back inside. The facebuster drops Rock but he’s back with the Rock Bottom…and Bulldog drops HHH with a clothesline. The running powerslam sets up the Pedigree to give HHH the win.

Rating: D-. So there was interference that didn’t matter in the result of the match, interference that did matter in the main event and the bull rope didn’t add a thing to the whole thing. I get that they had to do something with another gimmick, but the falls count anywhere thing was out of nowhere and the whole thing was a mess. Maybe it’s just gimmick overload, but this was the one last bad thing on a show full of them.

HHH: 3-2

Bulldog and HHH beat Rock down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Here’s what’s so frustrating about this show: there is a good idea in there somewhere. HHH having to run a gauntlet to stay in a title match isn’t a terrible idea (though it’s quite a good guy thing rather than something you would normally see from a mega heel) but this was all taking place in the span of less than two hours with no notice. Since wrestling five matches in one night for anyone is tricky enough, having those five matches last about half an hour at most combined. It’s hard to fathom how you can run through THAT MUCH in one night, but Russo managed to pull it off.

That’s in addition to a hardcore match and First Blood match, plus two more matches. It’s a case of what could have been and good night there was a lot of potential wasted here. This felt like a video game more than a wrestling show, and it’s also a good example of why that’s a really bad idea. Horrible execution here, even if there was something of an idea.

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Monday Night Raw – September 20, 1999: They Can’t Do Everything

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 20, 1999
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 11,879
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Vince McMahon is the WWF Champion. What else is there to say in a situation like this? McMahon won the title from HHH in little more than a fluke after interference from Steve Austin and that means things are going to get even wackier around here. We’re also six days away from Unforgiven so we’ll have to see where things go. Let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH challenging Vince McMahon to a WWF Title match on Smackdown and somehow managing to lose the title, albeit thanks to Steve Austin.

Opening sequence.

JR calls this an action adventure series. Good grief Vince stop overthinking things.

Here is Vince McMahon, who opens his jacket to reveal the title in a great shot. Vince says anything can happen in the World Wrestling Federation and the grin is amazing. The thing is, due to a previous agreement, he can’t have anything to do with day to day business. Therefore, the title is officially vacant and the winner of the Six Pack Challenge at Unforgiven will be the new champion.

Cue Steve Austin to interrupt, saying that while they can’t stand each other, the place hasn’t been the same without him. Austin gets to the point though: if Vince isn’t in the match at Unforgiven, there are five people in a Six Pack and Austin doesn’t like an incomplete Six Pack. He wants Vince to put him in the match but that would be doing business so Vince isn’t allowed.

Cue HHH and Chyna, again with security, to interrupt. HHH is livid and wants the title shot too….but Austin says there are 16,000 (not quite) people calling him an a******. HHH threatens Vince, only to have Shane McMahon come out and say no one in his family is getting hurt. Tonight, we’ll do Vince/Shane vs. HHH/Chyna, which surprises Vince.

Shane leaves and Vince recaps the “I can’t do business” thing, but Austin says that the fine print (HELLO RUSSO!) says Austin and Austin alone can reinstate him. He’ll do it for a title shot, which works for Vince….but Austin will face the winner rather than being in the Six Pack Challenge. HHH is in the match, because it means more people can beat him up.

HHH says screw Vince, but Vince says screw HHH, because Austin is going to be the guest enforcer. They were rushing through stuff here and the “you didn’t read the fine print” stuff is always horrible. Otherwise, Vince dropping the belt is fine as there was no reason to keep the title on him for any length of time.

Rock meets a security guard named Louise and sings her some Elvis as a birthday present. And gives her money.

Mankind is in the boiler room and gets in a fight with Mideon, who appears to just be browsing. Viscera comes in to help beat Mankind out through the door, where Big Show helps beat him up as we take a break. During the break, the Rock made the save.

Video on Ken Shamrock vs. Chris Jericho.

The referees are still on strike.

Chris Jericho vs. Billy Gunn

Curtis Hughes is here too. Jericho’s shoulder runs Gunn over to start (that’s a surprise) but Gunn is back up with a suplex. They head outside where Gunn goes after Hughes, allowing Jericho to come back with a triangle dropkick. The floor pads are peeled back but Gunn suplexes him onto…well onto the pads actually. Hughes gets in a cheap shot but Gunn is fine enough to grab a powerslam for two back inside. The Jackhammer connects, only for Jericho to grab replacement referee Tom Prichard. That lets Hughes DDT Gunn onto the concrete, so the Walls can finish the out cold Gunn.

Rating: C+. Yeah you had interference and such, but this was as close as you’re going to get to a clean match around here. Jericho gets a win over someone with some status, but it also makes Hughes look like that much more of a threat. Hughes looked like a goof in his first appearances, so having him actually help Jericho is a good move.

Mankind tells Michael Cole to know his mouth and shut his role (yep) because he wants Big Show and Undertaker to defend the Tag Team Titles against himself and the Rock. Cue the Rock to complain about a broken watch, even though he wasn’t here to do anything but sing Happy Birthday to….that old woman whose name he can’t remember.

After putting a Rock shirt over Cole’s head (Rock didn’t like how he was looking at him), Rock goes on about Undertaker not liking his trash talk. Rock even talks trash in his sleep (and he demonstrates) and the challenge is on. Mankind keeps the shirt and insists that everything between himself and Rock is platonic.

Undertaker tells Rock to find his writers to come up with an apology for him because he’s in trouble. The title match is on, under Darkside Rules, whatever that means.

Here is Ivory, who says it’s time to party. She’s sick of all the vermin and insects in this time (JR: “I haven’t seen any rats!”) but will defend the title against any sick creature on the roster, like Luna Vachon! For now though, she issues a challenge to anyone in the crowd and here’s a woman to accept. And of course it’s Luna.

Luna vs. Ivory

Non-title and Luna gives her a slam into a DDT for the pin in short order.

D’Lo Brown says he was just trying to look out for his friend when he tried to get Mark Henry in better shape. He’s ready to beat Henry up at Unforgiven, but Henry chairs him in the back.

The McMahons talk strategy.

Post break, D’Lo Brown jumps in a car and drives off, presumably after Mark Henry.

Test, with Stephanie McMahon, is ready for a street fight against Jeff Jarrett. Cue Jarrett, who says he wants a mixed tag instead, with Stephanie and Debra as partners. Stephanie accepts and even Test knows this is a really bad idea.

Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Gangrel is here with the Hardys and the Acolytes are on commentary. Bradshaw gives the Acolytes’ three demandments: don’t drink our beer, don’t mess with our rats and don’t cut a promo on us! Stevie Richards walks down, dressed as a Dudley Boy, as Faarooq mocks Bubba Ray’s stutter. Richards’ distraction doesn’t work but he gets in a brawl with Gangrel, allowing Matt to get two off a neckbreaker. Instead it’s a suplex into the Swanton for two on D-Von, only for Bubba to powerbomb Jeff on the floor. Matt misses a moonsault and the 3D finishes him off.

Post match the Acolytes are in to brawl with the Dudleyz, with Richards and Gangrel still fighting. There was WAY too much going on in this whole thing, but Bradshaw going unhinged was funny.

Jeff Jarrett puts the makeup woman in the Figure Four.

Jeff Jarrett/Debra vs. Test/Stephanie McMahon

Test slams him down to start but Jarrett is back up with a shot to the face. Debra won’t tag in so Test hits the pumphandle powerslam. The top rope elbow connects and Stephanie pins Jarrett in less than two minutes. Remember that Jarrett is the reigning Intercontinental Champion with a pay per view title defense, not against Test, in six days.

Post match Jarrett yells at Debra and puts her in the Figure Four.

Rock isn’t listening to anything Mankind says. Mankind: “ROODY POO!”

Undertaker is talking to Kane.

Tag Team Titles: Mankind/The Rock vs. Big Show/Undertaker

Undertaker and Big Show are defending in Darkside Rules which means….no idea yet, but Rock thinks it means Mideon and Viscera will get involved. Rock didn’t like Undertaker suggesting that Rock has writers, so he wrote his own little rhyme about sending Undertaker to the Smackdown Hotel. Undertaker sits in on commentary and still won’t explain the rules, but here are Mideon and Viscera, just like the Rock predicted.

Apparently this is now a handicap match (with Rock and Show in street clothes) as Mideon and Mankind start things off. Mankind hits a running knee in the corner but Show takes him outside for a rather hard toss. It’s quickly off to Rock for the Rock Bottom on Viscera with Mideon having to make the save (Undertaker: “That’s harmony.” Harmony?). Cue Kane, whose top rope clothesline hits Big Show, apparently on purpose. Kane knocks Show to the floor and leaves, with Undertaker swearing Vengeance. The Mandible Claw, Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow finish Mideon to give Rock and Mankind the titles.

Rating: C-. Sure why not. That’s the reaction to a lot of these things, but Rock and Mankind were able to make almost anything work. It’s becoming more and more obvious that Undertaker is injured and unable to wrestle at the moment, so this was about the only way to get the titles off of he and Show. Not much of a match of course because that’s not the point, but a coherent ten minute match would be nice for a change.

Marianna, looking roughed up, says she made a mistake with Shawn Stasiak but doesn’t deserve this. Chaz comes up and gets taken away by cops. So not only are they doing a domestic abuse angle, but Chaz was wearing Scooby Doo boxers.

Undertaker sends his minions after Kane.

Steve Blackman vs. Shawn Stasiak

Val Venis comes out with Blackman’s bag of weapons and joins commentary as Stasiak kicks away in the corner. Venis makes references about Blackman being, uh, small in certain areas as JR hears a buzzing noise. They trade kicks as commentary keeps going on about the buzzing. Blackman grabs the bag and finds…a vibrator. Stasiak gets a rollup for the fast pin. Keep in mind that we went from a domestic abuse angle to this in the span of five minutes.

Here is Undertaker to call Kane a weak coward and it ends tonight. Cue Kane, but here are Mideon, Viscera and Big Show to beat him down. Kane is covered in gasoline but Show can’t get the lighter to work, allowing Mankind and Rock to make the save with baseball bats.

Earlier today, Al Snow had a funeral for Pepper, with the rottweilers standing guard. Snow swears vengeance….and then we cut to a still from GTV of Big Boss Man relieving himself on the grave.

Hardcore Holly vs. Big Boss Man

Hardcore match with Crash Holly in Hardcore’s corner. After Hardcore makes a reference to Boss Man being, uh, soft in a certain personal area, they fight to the floor to start. Boss Man hits him with a chair but Hardcore breaks a pitcher over Boss Man’s head. Cue Al Snow on screen to show the rottweilers attacking a dummy. Boss Man handcuffs Hardcore to the rope but Crash gets in a shot with a wrench for the pin (with Hardcore still cuffed).

Mark Henry is at a strip club when D’Lo Brown attacks. The dancers were totally fine with a full camera crew filming them on national TV.

Jeff Jarrett jumps Chyna again but HHH and security break it up.

HHH/Chyna vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Before the match, HHH promises to win the WWF Title back and neither Vince nor Austin can do anything about it. Hold on though as there’s no Vince, as there is a forklift blocking his dressing room door. We have a substitute though.

HHH/Chyna vs. Test/Shane McMahon

It’s a brawl to start with Shane spearing Chyna and then doing the same to HHH before all four fight outside. Back in and Shane gets crotched on the buckle as something resembling a tag match breaks out. HHH stomps away and hits the facebuster for two before Chyna grabs the chinlock.

That’s broken up and Shane brings in Test to hammer on HHH In the corner. What looks to be a superplex is broken up but Shane is back in with the Bronco Buster. Cue Jeff Jarrett to draw Chyna to the back, leaving HHH to block Test’s top rope elbow. Another low blow puts Shane down again so HHH decks the referee. Back to back Pedigrees leave Shane and Test laying so HHH wears them out with a chair, which is enough for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was thee closest thing to a match that I’ve seen around here in a few months so it could have been worse. HHH going out there to wreck people is acceptable in this case as Test had already wrestled (barely, but he did wrestle) and Shane isn’t a full time wrestler, meaning it was logical enough. Not much of a match and too much going on, but that’s how things work around here.

Post match HHH goes to leave but Vince McMahon pops up to hit him with a chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. As has been the case forever with Russo, the problem comes down to “slow down already”. There is just so much going on and it hurts the good things that are taking place. It’s easy enough to keep track of stuff, but having Chaz beating up his ex-girlfriend (or at last implying it) and then the stuff with Venis and Blackman comes so far out of left field and brings things down. They really need to cut out the terrible parts to boost this up, because even Austin and company can only do so much with nonsense like “here’s the fine print”.

 

 

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Smackdown – September 16, 1999 (2024 Edition): He Actually Did It

Smackdown
Date: September 16, 1999
Location: Thomas And Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 8,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting closer to Unforgiven and in this case everything is crashing down around HHH. While he survived a title match with Steve Austin on Raw, Vince McMahon is back after HHH went after Linda McMahon. That can’t end well, but we still don’t have a #1 contender to the pay per view in ten days. Let’s get to it.

Here is Raw if you need a recap.

We open with the referees on strike over unsafe working conditions. Why do wrestling promotions think stories about referees are interesting?

Opening sequence.

Here is Steve Austin to get things going. Just because he got disqualified against HHH on Raw doesn’t mean that they’re done with each other by a long shot. When HHH beat him in the knee with a chair, he should have done that much more, because HHH didn’t get the job done. Austin wants a rematch right here tonight and we should make it No Holds Barred.

Or if HHH wants to do this the hard way, Austin can just beat him so badly that he’s going to the hospital. Cue HHH and Chyna, with a bunch of cops backing them up. HHH says that’s not happening because Austin has to go to the back of the line. The title will be defended tonight though, against a main eventer of HHH’s choice. Austin promises to follow HHH all night and it’s going to involve his foot going….well you get the idea.

HHH will officially defend the title in a Six Pack Challenge at Unforgiven after the five way match went to a no contest. That’s a heck of a way to jump from nothing to something.

Here is Shane McMahon, who calls out Joey Abs because of what Joey said about Stephanie McMahon on Raw. Cue the Mean Street Posse, with Terri, so Shane dives onto Joey to start fast.

Shane McMahon vs. Joey Abs

There’s no referee because of the strike, making me wonder why the bell ring if there was no one to call it. The rest of the Posse jumps Shane before going outside as Stephanie and Test are watching in the back. Here is Gerald Brisco to count two off Shane’s rollup and another two off Joey’s suplex.

Shane’s jumping back elbow gets two but Briscoe gets in a fight with Pete Gas on the floor. Rodney comes in to beat on Shane, who fights the off as Pat Patterson, in shorts, comes out to count two on Joey, with Rodney breaking that up as well. Shane hits a corkscrew Swanton (close to a Spinal Tap) for the pin with Shawn Stasiak of all people coming in as the third referee.

Rating: C-. A match between Shane McMahon and a member of the Mean Street Posse, which didn’t even last four minutes, had three referees, two people interfering, and two fights involving some of those referees, who were replacements because the referees are on strike. That’s about as 1999 as you can get and it’s rather exhausting to keep track of all this stuff. That being said, the place was going nuts for Shane, which is one of the reasons he was around so often.

Post match Stephanie comes out and drops Joey again.

Here is Women’s Champion Ivory, who is SO EXCITED that actress/model Cindy Margolis is here. She invites Cindy into the ring and gushes over Cindy’s beauty and star power. Ivory asks Cindy to do one of the poses she gets downloaded on her website but Cindy declines. That doesn’t work for Ivory, who threatens violence if it doesn’t happen. Cindy eventually does it…and here is Jeff Jarrett to put Cindy in the Figure Four, with Cindy kind of begging him not to and then grabbing her knee. Jarrett Figure Fours Ivory for a bonus.

HHH, in trunks but without elbow pads for a weird look, says he won’t be defending against Steve Austin.

European Title: Mark Henry vs. Steve Blackman

Henry is defending after skipping a tag match with Blackman on Raw. Tony Garea is referee as Blackman kicks Henry down without much trouble. Cue Val Venis with a kendo stick to Blackman though, allowing Henry to get the easy pin.

Post match D’Lo Brown comes in and Sky Highs Henry (that wasn’t bad).

Jeff Jarrett yells at Cindy Margolis as she is put in an ambulance. Test comes in for the brawl.

Post break Jarrett challenges Test to a match tonight.

Here is Chris Jericho, with Curtis Hughes, for a chat. Jericho declares himself one bad mamma jamma and says Ken Shamrock has finally admitted defeat. Shamrock has begged him to make sure that they never meet face to face again and then licked the dust off Jericho’s boots in gratitude. He’s also begged Hughes to not rip him limb from limb, but Jericho is allowing Hughes to take his place against Shamrock tonight. That’s not all though, because Jericho has a special guest referee for this match: the masked Mexican legend, El Dopo!

Curtis Hughes vs. Ken Shamrock

Chris Jericho is on commentary as Shamrock takes Hughes down and strikes away. Hughes takes him to the floor for a drop onto the barricade as Cole dares to ask Jericho why he won’t face Shamrock. With that nonsense out of the way, Shamrock fights up and sends Hughes into various steel objects. Jericho offers a distraction though and Hughes cuts Shamrock off so the double teaming can be on. Back in and Hughes drops an elbow for two but Shamrock kneebars him. Hughes grabs the rope so Dopo immediately calls for the DQ.

Post match Shamrock is livid and unmasks Dopo as Howard Finkel, which was fairly obvious as soon as he came into the arena.

Mankind is expecting total mayhem in the five man Royal Rumble, but he and Rock will be working as a team. They’re like an automobile, with Rock being a fine engine and Mankind being the one who holds the bags. Yes he’s the rear end, but he’s the People’s Rear End. And he doesn’t like HHH either!

Remember how the referees were on strike earlier today? They’re still on strike.

Royal Rumble

Five entrants, because we need 1/6 size Royal Rumble with one minute intervals. Rock is in at #1 and talks about how Big Show, Kane or Undertaker need to go play the People’s Slow Machine to land three Brahma Bulls. You’d see Undertaker, with his Mickey Mouse tattoos and his 33lb head jumping around like a girl, Kane doing cartwheels and using his voicebox to say “I won, I won, let’s party”, and Big Show just scaring people in general.

Then the Rock himself would arrive, watch the tears stream down their cheeks, and gather up all the gold coins that they won and…well you know the bit. Anyway, after that whole thing, which I remember reciting with my friends when I was 11 because it was the funniest thing I had ever heard at the time, Big Show is in at #2 and we’re ready to go.

Rock strikes away to start but gets sent face first into the buckle to cut him off. Mankind ins in at #3 and the double teaming has Show in trouble. After what felt like a rather quick minute, Kane is in at #4 so Rock hammers away on him as Show chokes Mankind in the corner. Undertaker, in street clothes, is in at #5 to complete the field but he sits in on commentary rather than getting inside. The other four brawl, with Mankind clotheslining Kane out, only to get thrown out by Rock. Show hits a chokeslam on Rock but can’t throw him out, which is enough for Undertaker to get in the ring and dump them both for the win.

Rating: C-. What is there to say about a match like this? It wasn’t long and ended with something of a screwy finish as Undertaker did one thing and won the match. There was nothing but bragging rights on the line and that doesn’t leave much in the way of interest. Having the star power in there helped, but you need something more interesting for those stars to do.

Post match Mideon and Viscera come in to help Show beat Rock down.

Here are the Hollys to say Chyna has had more than enough time to find a partner. Cue Chyna, who is going to do this on her own.

Hollys vs. Chyna

Chyna forearms Crash (whose gear says HARDCORE HOLLY) to start so it’s quickly off to Hardcore (whose gear also says HARDCORE HOLLY). A shot to the face staggers Hardcore as well and it’s a double low blow to put the cousins down. Hardcore takes Chyna down and here is Billy Gunn to join in as Chyna’s partner. That doesn’t go well to start as a double elbow to the face puts Chyna down and Hardcore adds a suplex. Chyna DDTs her way to freedom though and it’s Gunn coming in to clean house. The Fameasser is good for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Another nothing mach but at least it was long enough to rate for once. In theory Chyna would want to go it alone here and isn’t likely to be happy with Gunn for making the save. The match was just kind of there to give Chyna a reason to get mad, and there are worse options available.

Post match Chyna yells at Gunn, as she didn’t want help, but here is Jeff Jarrett to hit her in the back with a frying pan and cover her with an apron. Jarrett gives her a soup ladle and the frying pan, saying now all she has to do is start fixing him supper.

Big Boss Man, with a bag labeled “DOGGIE BAG” is ready for….the Pepper On A Pole match. Sweet goodness can Russo quit already?

Big Boss Man vs. Al Snow

Pepper On A Pole, because this is a thing. Snow stops away to start and hits the trapping headbutts (strong grapple plus up plus B) but it’s too early to get the bag. Boss Man catches a diving Snow and then hits him with the nightstick. Cue the rottweilers from Raw with the British Bulldog for a distraction, allowing Boss Man to grab the bag…which doesn’t count as he throws it to the floor, allowing Snow to grab it for the win. The remains of a dog on a pole match involving the British Bulldog leading a team of rottweilers is the match that SETS UP the big gimmick match between these two. For the Hardcore Title.

HHH and Chyna are in the back, with Steve Austin stalking them.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Test

Jarrett, with Miss Kitty and Debra, is defending. Test kicks him in the face to start but Jarrett comes back as the Mean Street Posse comes out. A powerslam plants Jarrett as Stephanie, Shane and the Stooges come out to brawl as everything is thrown out. The fans of course want puppies.

Post match the brawl stays on and Jarrett damages Test’s shoulder. Shane saves Stephanie from Jarrett’s Figure Four.

Here is HHH, with Chyna to defend the WWF Title and there are a bunch of cops on the stage, presumably to cut off an invading Steve Austin. We cut to the back where Stephanie McMahon and Test (with his bad shoulder) are leaving, which writes Test out of the list of possible challengers. HHH says he gets to pick the guest referee, so he would like Shane McMahon to get out here.

With Shane here, HHH says he won’t be facing Undertaker, Big Show or Kane, which leaves the Rock. Since Rock has an obsession with putting things in a certain place on various people, Rock can kiss HHH’s so it’s not him. That leaves one option, and it’s someone with testicles thee size of grapefruits (Lawler: “ME???”).

HHH calls out Vince McMahon and is willing to put the title on the line to get a piece of him. We cut to the back, where Vince doesn’t want to do it but HHH suggests doing, uh, things, with Linda McMahon, which is enough to get Vince out here. Vince still says no but HHH tells him to go hide behind his skirt. HHH throws in that he can keep it up with Linda all night long and that’s enough to start the match.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Vince McMahon

Vince is challenging and hammers away in the corner, only for HHH to stomp him down without much effort. The comeback is cut off again and referee Shane McMahon does not approve. HHH fires off some shoulders in the corner and stomps Vince down even more, allowing Chyna to get in a cheap shot of her own as the beating continues.

They go outside with HHH choking with a camera cable. HHH beats him onto the announcers’ table and drops an elbow through it, with Shane’s pleas to stop not getting him anywhere. Back in and Chyna hands HHH a chair, allowing him to shove Shane down and blast Vince in the head. Shane tackles HHH down and hammers away so Chyna comes in for the save, with HHH chairing Shane in the head as well.

Cue Linda McMahon and the Stooges, with the men getting beaten down too. Chyna holds Linda so she has to watch HHH beat on the bloody Vince. The Pedigree is loaded up and heeeeere’s Austin to beat HHH down. HHH and Chyna get a Stunner each…and Austin puts Vince on top so Shane can count the pin to make Vince champion. As Austin’s music plays.

Rating: C. The match was little more than a squash until Austin came in at the end, making this the second time Austin has caused a title change in such a similar way this year (after the famous Mankind win). Vince barely got in any offense but there is nothing wrong with that kind of a story in small doses. After Vince was around the main event scene for so long, having him win the title isn’t the biggest shock, especially on a fluke like this. It was fun, and that’s what it needed to be.

HHH chases Austin through the crowd as Vince is helped up. Brisco jumps up and down to celebrate as the show ends. This was such goofy fun and Vince was always right in the middle of everything that having him win the title, even on a fluke like this, was rather entertaining.

Overall Rating: C. The ending didn’t save the show but it was good enough to carry it across the finish line. Above all else, there are still too many completely insane things going on (Pepper On A Pole) but things like Chris Jericho and Shane McMahon are bringing things up a bit. Austin is at his usual incredibleness and the show is still working, but dang they could be so much better if they got rid of some of the nonsense.

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Monday Night Raw – September 13, 1999: They’re Trying To Get There

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 13, 1999
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 11,186
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re closing in on Unforgiven and the big story continues to be HHH vs. the world. Steve Austin returned last week on Smackdown to nearly kill HHH with a semi truck and that means we might have the challenge for the pay per view in sight. Other than that, the rest of the company is as wacky as usual and that should make for an eventful night. Let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown is you need a recap.

We look at Steve Austin attempting to murder HHH, who has quite a few people after him.

Opening sequence.

A bunch of people (Undertaker, Big Show, Kane, Mankind, Steve Austin) all seem to be looking for HHH.

Speaking of HHH, he gets a full police motorcade escort.

Here is Linda McMahon, with the Stooges, for a chat. Linda wastes no time in making a five way match tonight for the #1 contendership at Unforgiven. For now though, HHH has to remain champion and if Steve Austin wants a title shot, he can have it. Tonight. Cue HHH and Chyna (with security) to interrupt and things are not looking positive. HHH goes on a rant about how Linda is screwing him over but HHH tells her how things go. Cue Big Show, Undertaker, Rock, Mankind and Kane for a brawl, with HHH escaping.

We recap Jeff Jarrett attacking Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young on Smackdown.

Jarrett issues an open challenge to any woman.

The Rock, with Mankind, talks about how he is back in Anaheim and is ready to face anyone to get to HHH. This includes Mankind, even if they are friends. Mankind is ready to have feelings but he’s ready for Rock to beat him up.

Jeff Jarrett vs. ???

Miss Kitty and Debra are here with Jarrett and it’s….Luna Vachon answering the challenge. Luna charges in and gets stomped down to start, followed by a shot to the face. Jarrett hammers away in the corner but cue Ivory to hit Luna with a guitar for the DQ.

Post match Jarrett does not like Lilian Garcia announcing Luna as the winner so he puts Garcia in the Figure Four.

Chyna is not impressed with Jarrett and threatens Steve Austin with a sledgehammer.

Faarooq vs. D-Von Dudley

Strap match, just because. Faarooq starts fast and snaps off a powerslam before choking with the strap. D-Von fights back and chokes away, followed by some nasty whipping. Back up and the spinebuster gets Faarooq out of trouble, only for Bubba to hit a nasty chair to the head to give D-Von the pin.

Post match Bradshaw gets taken out with the steps but comes back with a chair to clear out the Dudleyz.

Undertaker and Big Show are ready to take out HHH, who is now the hunted instead of the hunter. Even the Crocodile Hunter can’t save them now. As for Rock, they’re going to be on him like the leather pants on the girl in the front row. This is a weird version of Undertaker and hopefully it doesn’t last long.

Jim Ross brings out the British Bulldog for a chat. Last week he gave Al Snow the Hardcore Title back because Snow deserves it. He’s also back because he wants to show that he can still do this after his injury. There is only one belt that he has left to win and that is the WWF Title. That’s the one thing he wants to win before he retires, which won’t be for a long time.

Cue the Big Boss Man to interrupt because he did not like Bulldog interrupting him last week. Before this is over between them, Bulldog is going home in a doggy bag. Cue Al Snow (he’s barking) to sing about where oh where has his Boss Man gone. Snow: “There you are Ray!” Snow recaps the Pepper saga and challenges him to a match, which will involve a cage inside the Cell, but Boss Man is only interested if the Hardcore Title is on the line. Snow says sure, so Boss Man is in, but also ready to fight tonight.

One more thing though: Snow introduces some rottweilers who will be in between the two cages. Bulldog jumps Boss Man from behind and they fight at ringside with Boss Man getting the better of things, only to be chased off by the dogs. You could hear them trying to make sense of this as they were explaining the concept and it was showing badly. No one could make this sound good, as it’s a total mess.

The Mean Street Posse, with Terri, doesn’t like Test so they’re going to beat him up, even if Shane McMahon doesn’t want them to. Oh and Stephanie McMahon is a tramp.

Someone has attacked Shane McMahon.

Tony Chimmel comes out to take over for the Fink.

Joey Abs vs. Test

The rest of the Posse is here too and they all ump Test before the bell, allowing Joey to grab a suplex for an early two. Test gets in a shot of his own though and the comeback is on. A full nelson slam puts Abs down but the Posse comes in again. That’s broken up and Test grabs a powerbomb for the fast pin.

Post match the beatdown is on again but Shane McMahon runs in for the save. The Posse is chased outside with Shane and Test giving chase in their car.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. HHH

Austin, in street clothes, is challenging. Hold on though as HHH is in street clothes as well and has some cops (and Chyna) with him. HHH brings up the aggravated assault from Smackdown and has personally signed a warrant for Austin’s arrest (I don’t think that’s how warrants work). The cops handcuff and arrest Austin, with HHH getting a cheap shot because of course. No match if that wasn’t clear.

Post break Austin is put in a police car and HHH takes Linda McMahon’s phone and throws it down.

Godfather vs. Chaz

Apparently Chaz and Marianna have amicably ended their relationship, so Godfather isn’t going to offer him the ladies this week. Chaz takes him down with a drop toehold to start and works on the arm as the ladies dance and shout a lot on the floor. Some arm cranking ensues but cue Marianna (wit a black eye) to ask Chaz why. Godather isn’t happy and kicks him into the corner, setting up the Ho Train (but an angry one you see), followed by the Pimp Drop for the pin. That’s not a place you want to go with a wrestling storyline and it doesn’t feel great here.

The Stooges try to get Linda McMahon to leave but she’s staying because it’s family business.

We recap X-Pac and Kane going their separate ways.

A cage is lowered and here is Chris Jericho, but believe it or not he has something to say. Jericho calls out Ken Shamrock, who is certainly a SHAM, but he certainly doesn’t work. This is the Jericho Prison and he is ready to prove himself against one of the most proficient fighters in the world. This brings out GOTCH GRACIE, a masked man who has trained everywhere (Lawler: “JR, you probably know where he played college football!”).

Chris Jericho vs. Gotch Gracie

Gracie is in a mask and all black, with his shirt saying GOTCH. Jericho (“Here goes nothing!”) takes him down for a bow and arrow beore grabbing the mic and saying that could have broken his back. Jericho puts on an Octopus Hold and muscles him over for a suplex, with Jericho saying that’s enough. Gracie fights back with a clothesline but gets pulled into the Liontamer for the fast pin.

Post match Jericho goes for an ankle lock but Ken Shamrock runs in. Jericho and Gracie beat Shamrock down and Gracie is unmasked as….Curtis (Mr.) Hughes. That’s not the best reveal but you know exactly what you’re getting with Hughes.

D’Lo Brown and Godfather have a business transaction.

Chris Jericho shows he just proved that he is the most dangerous man in the WWF. He went out and got Curtis Hue to protect Shamrock from Jericho himself.

Kane vs. Mankind vs. Big Show vs. Undertaker vs. The Rock

For a title shot at Unforgiven and for some reason Undertaker and Show are introduced with a combined weight. The two of them jump Mankind before everyone else get here but argue over the pin. Rock and Kane come out as well with Kane hitting the top rope clothesline on Mankind.

Cue Mideon and Viscera to jump Mankind as this is just a big brawl rather than much of a match. Mankind manages a double arm DDT on Kane but Undertaker drops the referee. Rock gives Undertaker a DDT into the People’s Elbow as another referee comes in, only to get taken out by Kane.

More referees and agents come in and get decked as well, followed by Earl Hebner, who throws up his hands and leaves. Cue the Godfather to go after Undertaker (it goes badly), Crash Holly to go after Big Show (it goes worse) and more people who are beaten up just as quickly. The locker room empties out and everyone starts fighting with everyone as this is thrown out.

Rating: C. What is there to say about something like this? It’s barely a match and is much more about a bunch of people brawling before even more people come in to brawl as well. That doesn’t get you very far, but it was certainly energetic. And we still don’t even have a #1 contender as the lack of organization continues.

And no, that isn’t the main event, because it’s 1999.

The referees tell Earl Hebner to do something about these beatings they’re taking.

Val Venis/D’Lo Brown vs. Mark Henry/Steve Blackman

This feels like it belongs on a Lethal Lottery show. Well hang on as Henry isn’t here so Blackman bets up Venis on his own. Venis fights back and hands it off to Brown, who misses an elbow and gets caught with a dropkick. It’s back to Venis for a spinebuster but Blackman hits an enziguri for two more. Venis is right back with a fisherman’s suplex into the Low Down for the fast pin. It’s almost weird to see a straight match with nothing screwy going on.

The screwiness is after the match as GTV pops on to show Henry getting a lap dance from Godfather’s ladies.

A limousine, with a police escort, arrives.

WWF Title: HHH vs. ???

HHH, in street clothes and with Chyna, is defending and calls out Linda McMahon of all people. HHH wants Linda to say that Steve Austin has forfeited his title shot and has to start all the way at the bottom again. Linda: “No.” That has HHH ready to go after Linda but cue Vince McMahon to make the save. Vince says he gave his word that he wouldn’t interfere in business, but this is personal.

They’re ready to fight so here is Austin (also in street clothes and again, I don’t think this company knows how the legal system works) to start the brawl, and apparently the match, with HHH. Austin beats him around the ring and into the crowd, setting up a suplex on the floor. A bunch of chair shots and a right hand to Earl Hebner are enough to get Austin disqualified.

Rating: C. This was an angle rather than a match (I’m shocked too) and that’s all it needed to be. Austin being back in the arena so soon after a big angle earlier means it should have been a brawl like this, but that’s quite the match to just burn off in three minutes. Either way, the fans were going nuts and I guess that’s what matters the most?

Post match the cage is lowered and Austin beats HHH up both inside and outside to end the show.

We get about five extra minutes, called Extra Attitude, of Austin beating on HHH even more and drinking beer. Real revolutionary stuff there, though the cage is kind of swinging back and forth for a weird feeling.

Overall Rating: C. They were trying to have something coherent here but it was just enough of a mixture of the Russo style of insanity with something more focused. The overarching story of “everyone is out to get HHH and tonight is Austin’s chance” is fine, but there are so many moving parts that you need a scorecard. It kept my interest, though it had the usual problem of feeling like they had three weeks piled into two hours. Calm the heck down and see how much better the show can be. You can even keep the matches short, but let something sink in for once.

 

 

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Collision – September 28, 2024: I Was Expecting More

Collision
Date: September 28, 2024
Location: Arthur Ashe Stadium, New York City, New York
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Ian Riccaboni, Matt Menard

It’s the second show in the tennis stadium and that means we are in for a big card. In this case it means we have a lumberjack strap match between Hangman Page and Jeff Jarrett, an open challenge for the TNT Title and Saraya’s Rules between Saraya and Jamie Hayter. That should be enough so let’s get to it.

Here is Dynamite if you need a recap.

Saraya vs. Jamie Hayter

This is under Saraya’s Rules, which basically means Saraya can do whatever she wants and Hayter can do nothing. Harley Cameron is here with Saraya and says there is one more rule: the match does not begin until Saraya “slaps the slag”. Saraya does get in the slap and Hayter drops both of them in short order. Cameron grabs the leg though and Saraya gets in a VCR shot before beating on Hayter with a computer keyboard.

Cameron gets in some more shots on the floor (Menard smiles because he likes a good crazy woman). Hayter fights up and German suplexes Saraya on the floor before sending Cameron hard into the steps. Saraya hits her in the back with a pipe before pouring a bunch of toy cars onto a table. That takes too long though and Hayter sends her into the barricade as well.

Cameron offers a distraction but Hayter still catches a diving Saraya with a powerslam. They go up, with Saraya hitting Hayter with a chair, knocking her through a table and Cameron onto another (with Hayter’s head coming dangerously close to slamming into the still standing table). That’s enough to give Saraya two on the floor…and now she’s willing to try for a countout. Back in and Hayter drives her through a table in the corner for a breather and hits a tombstone, followed by Hayterade for the pin at 8:10.

Rating: B-. I feel like I’ve seen so many of these matches lately that there’s just nothing to get excited about anymore. They hit each other with weapons, they put each other through tables, they do something that makes fans think “oh I’ve stepped on one of those and that hurts” and then they had the finish. On the positive side, it was a good, hard fought win for Hayter, who can move on from these two and get into something more serious.

We get more of a sitdown interview with Ricochet and Will Ospreay, with Ricochet talking about how he showed up and everyone was on him. Ospreay says the best in the world is on him too. More on this on YouTube.

Conglomeration vs. Learning Tree

Tornado Tag. It’s a big brawl to start, as it kind of has to do. Cassidy hits Jericho in the face with a backpack for two, revealing a brick inside. Keith comes back in and gets caught with the Stundog Millionaire. Bill is back in but gets sent outside, with Briscoe loading up the chair. That takes too long though and Jericho hits an AA to send Briscoe into the chair.

We take a break and come back with Bill cleaning house until a three on one beating in the corner cuts him off. Briscoe starts cleaning house with the chair but Jericho cuts him off with a Codebreaker. Jericho is sat in the chair for some alternating kicks but Bill makes another save. O’Reilly takes out Bill’s leg though and Briscoe hits Jericho with the chair. The Jay Driller hits Jericho but Briscoe would rather put him on a table. Bill chokeslams Briscoe through said table and Jericho gets the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. I’m not surprised that Jericho pinned a champion and is probably getting a title shot and you shouldn’t be either. That’s the kind of thing that Jericho does and I’m sure Briscoe will be stuck with him for months. As for the match, it was another wild brawl after the previous match was similar enough (though this one didn’t feature as many weapons), but this one had Jericho likely going into another title program so it’s a lot more frustrating.

Post match Jericho motions that he wants the title. I for one am shocked.

Brody King vs. Action Andretti

Andretti goes for the leg to start and hits the running shooting star press for an early two. King runs him over though and punches Andretti out of the air, setting up the Cannonball for the pin at 1:41. That worked.

Post match the Righteous runs in to brawl with Andretti, Top Flight and Lio Rush.

Jack Perry drives his stupid bus/van to the show.

TNT Title: Jack Perry vs. ???

Perry is defending against…Minoru Suzuki. We get the staredown to start and they trade forearms, with Suzuki getting the better of things. Suzuki takes him down and stomps on the arm as we take an early break. Back with Perry getting two off a neckbreaker as Schiavone seems to forget where we are for a second. Suzuki shrugs off some knees to the head and grabs the sleeper before switching to a failed Gotch Style piledriver attempt. They go outside with Perry being sent into the barricade. Perry comes back with a knee to the face and a DDT, followed by another running knee for the countout at 7:23.

Rating: C-. Yeah sure. I know Perry had to be on the show because he’s still a thing for whatever reason and this was probably supposed to be some big moment. Suzuki showing up for his regular exchange of forearms and funny looks isn’t exactly exciting either and that made for quite a lackluster match here. At least the break cut things up a bit.

Post match Perry beats on Suzuki even more until Katsuyori Shibata makes the save.

Trios Titles: Claudio Castagnoli/Pac/Wheeler Yuta vs. Private Party/Komander

Castagnoli/Pac/Yuta are defending but Yuta comes out behind them and really does not seem happy. Quen hammers on Pac in the corner to start but Castagnoli gets in a cheap shot from the apron so Pac can take over. Yuta won’t accept a tag in so Castagnoli slams Quen down and hits a double stomp. Something like an Irish Curse gives Castagnoli two and Pac chokes some more.

Quen fights out of the corner again though and it’s off to Kassidy for some fresh punching. Everything breaks down and Castagnoli Swings Kassidy but Yuta won’t do the dropkick. Komander sends Castagnoli outside so Yuta Angle Slams Kassidy (Yuta doesn’t look thrilled) for two. Kassidy slaps Yuta in the face though and that’s enough for Yuta to snap, with the elbows to the face and Cattle Mutilation (Pac approves) to retain at 7:23.

Rating: C+. This was almost a squash but it’s also one of the more interesting things in AEW. Having Yuta not wanting to be on the same side of the villains and only fighting because he got hit in the face has my interest and I’m curious to see where it goes. Yuta is doing the best he can with it, though it might be rather different when there is some tougher competition.

Post match Yuta snaps back to reality and storms away from his partners.

We get an Outrunners video, featuring them at an amusement park.

Hologram vs. Dralistico vs. The Beast Mortos

Mortos runs the other two over with a clothesline to start but they’re back up for a three way exchange of hurricanranas. Dralistico kicks Hologram down before sending Mortos outside, with Hologram hitting a dive onto both of them. We take a break and come back with Hologram being suplexed into the corner before kicking him in the head. Mortos gets headscissored down as well as commentary talks about how the current luchadors compare to the WCW days.

Holorgram’s big flip dive takes out Mortos on the floor but Mortos is back in to take out Dralistico. Hologram poisonranas Mortos into a crucifix bomb from Dralistico. That doesn’t keep him down long though as Mortos is back up with a double clothesline. A discus lariat drops Hologram and Dralistico grabs the cover for two. Dralistico is back up with a springboard Canadian Destroyer but Hologram grabs a crucifix to pin Dralistico at 10:08.

Rating: B. This was the popcorn match of the show and that’s all it needed to be. Hologram got to showcase himself but as usual, Mortos felt like a big star and seems to be someone who could be something special. As usual it’s more about Hologram though, which is starting to work, though he could use more of a feud.

Post match Rush comes in to pose with the losers, setting up a three way beatdown on Hologram. That’s not what I was hoping for from Mortos, as Los Ingobernables haven’t meant anything in months.

Kris Statlander is back and picking her spots, as she either takes people out or makes them better.

Here is the MxM Collection to present Max Caster’s improved jacket. They mock the idea of Caster being the best wrestler in the world and bring out some models, holding up cutouts of the Collection over their faces. Then they reveal a large man (named Hans, behind a mask) in Caster’s jacket, with a heard cut out from the chest. They want the rather large and muscular Hans on the team…but it’s really Billy Gunn, which brings out the Acclaimed to clear the ring. Caster gets his jacket back. This was really, really bad.

Hangman Page vs. Jeff Jarrett

Lumberjack strap match, with lumberjacks carrying straps (as the name implies). They slug it out until Jarrett sends him to the apron but Page avoids the whipping. Jarrett gets sent to the apron as well but saves himself too. Back up and Page sends him outside, but his friends won’t whip him. Another trip to the floor doesn’t go as well, with Jarrett taking a beating. Page suplexes him down and we take a break.

Well we’re supposed to though as commentary throws it to picture in picture but we’re still full screen. Page hammers away in the corner but misses a charge, only to knock Jarrett outside again for another whipping. We see to come back from break but the feed starts messing up (a graphic tells us it’s #2436 and we’re in part 4, with seg 7-10). Now we go picture in picture, with the video rewound to what we saw on full screen. Back with Jarrett hitting a Russian legsweep (same thing that happened before the glitching) but Page sends him outside, again in front of Jarrett’s friends.

A whip from Juice Robinson (dressed as a lumberjack) breaks up the Buckshot Lariat though and Jarrett hits a dive. The Stroke is broken up though and Page gets one of the straps to whip Jarrett. Karen Jarrett comes in to protect her husband, which is enough for Jeff to get his own strap and whip Page outside. Everyone, including Karen, gets in some whips, but a low blow cuts Jeff off. The Deadeye finishes for Page at 13:25 (from bell to bell, including the glitching and repeat footage).

Rating: B-. I’m not sure what to make of this one but I had a good time with it. Page survived what everyone threw at him and then beat a game Jeff. It didn’t need to do anything with drama or the like and they didn’t bother trying. Jeff got in a few shots before losing to the bigger star, which is all this should have been.

Post match Page beats up a variety of people but the Gunns chase him off.

Kazuchika Okada vs. Sammy Guevara

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Okada takes him up against the ropes. Okada hits a sliding kick to the head but Guevara sends him outside and strikes a pose. With Okada on the floor, Guevara gets a running start and dives off the steps with a cutter. Okada puts him back down though and we take a break.

Back with Guevara grabbing a headscissor driver and hitting a running clothesline to the floor. A moonsault out to the floor drops Okada again but he backdrops Guevara hard onto the steps. Back in and a top rope elbow hits Guevara but the Rainmaker is countered into a Spanish fly for two. The GTH sends Okada into the corner, where he comes out with the Rainmaker for the pin at 12:28.

Rating: B-. This is a match that would have been a lot better a few years ago, as Guevara is not exactly the star he used to be. Okada was doing his usual stuff here and it was only so good, with the Rainmaker wrecking Guevara in the end. It didn’t feel like much of a main event, but Okada in the ring is a nice treat most of the time.

Overall Rating: B-. Other than the name, there was nothing here that made this show feel important or big in any way. Hayter and Page got wins, the Learning Tree beat up the popular team, the two title matches were just there, and the main event felt like it could have been on any given show. Not a bad night at all, but not exactly worth your time.

Results
Jamie Hayter b. Saraya – Hayterade
Learning Tree b. Conglomeration – Chokeslam through a table to Briscoe
Brody King b. Action Andretti – Cannonball
Jack Perry b. Minoru Suzuki via countout
Claudio Castagnoli/Pac/Wheeler Yuta b. Private Party/Komander – Cattle Mutilation to Kassidy
Hologram b. Dralistico and The Beast Mortos – Crucifix to Dralistico
Hangman Page b. Jeff Jarrett – Deadeye
Kazuchika Okada b. Sammy Guevara – Rainmaker

 

 

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Collision – September 21, 2024: They’re In A Tough Spot

Collision
Date: September 21, 2024
Location: MassMutual Center, Springfield, Massachusetts
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Nigel McGuinness

It’s the last show before Grand Slam and that means it is time to start the final push towards the show. There is still a chance that we find out whether or not Bryan Danielson will be appearing at Grand Slam, along with anything else that might be added. Other than that, we have the Ring Of Honor Tag Team Titles on the line, as AEW shows continue to host a lot of the other promotion’s title matches. Let’s get to it.

Here is Dynamite if you need a recap.

Ring Of Honor Tag Team Titles: Sammy Guevara/Dustin Rhodes vs. Kingdom

The Kingdom is challenging in a Bunkhouse Brawl. Rhodes and Guevara come out in local hockey jerseys to make them even more popular. It’s a brawl on the stage to start as commentary points out that the Kingdom is from around here. The champs fight back inside as we talk about Dusty Rhodes giving Dustin the belt buckle he is wearing.

Bennett is already busted open and Guevara whips out a kendo stick to clean some house. A hard shot to the face sends Guevara outside though and something like a diving Doomsday Device on the floor makes it worse. Dustin goes after them but gets superkicked down, only to bulldog Taven off the stage and through some tables. Guevara is back up with a bulldog off the apron and through a table at ringside as we take a break. Back with Guevara being shoved off a ladder and through a table but Dustin grabs a double testicular claw to save himself.

A cowbell to the head puts Bennett down and Taven gets the same as the comeback is on. Dustin powerslams Taven onto a chair and then suplexes him through it for a nasty crash. Two chairs are set up and Dustin charges into a Death Valley Driver onto said chairs. Guevara is back in and gets Bennett in the corner, setting up Dustin’s Shattered Dreams and the Final Reckoning. Guevara’s Swanton off the ladder pins Bennett to retain at 13:19.

Rating: B. It was a good brawl, which is enough to get around the fact that the champions are still not that interesting. Guevara and Rhodes are just two guys who were put together because the show was in Texas for a few months. They don’t have anything special in the way of chemistry and yet Rhodes is a double champion for whatever reason.

The Conglomeration and Hologram are interrupted by the Premiere Athletes, who want no shenanigans. Mark Briscoe looks at these four scalawags and sees one shenanigator in the form of Mark Sterling. Kyle O’Reilly asks if shenanigator is the word of the day. Briscoe: “Close Kyle, but you’re way off.” The word of the day is AZUCAR, because Rocky Romero is here to even things out. As usual, Briscoe is as delightful of a thing as you will find in AEW.

The Dark Order is ready to face Darby Allin later tonight. Allin comes in to say there is a war coming with Jon Moxley and coming. He wants Evil Uno to remind him what he can do tonight.

Conglomeration/Hologram vs. Premiere Athletes

Rocky Romero is here with the good guys to even out the Athletes’ Mark Sterling. O’Reilly and Woods start things off with Woods having to bail to the ropes to escape the ankle lock. Hologram comes in to dropkick Nese, followed by another dropkick for another two. Sterling offers a distraction though and Woods gets in a cheap shot to take over as we go to a break.

Back with O’Reilly not being able to get over for the tag but then tagging in Hologram seconds later. Daivari gets in a knee from the apron though and Hologram has to hand it off to Briscoe for Redneck Kung Fu. The Death Valley Driver hits Woods and Hologram dives onto Sterling, leaving Briscoe to hit the Jay Driller for the pin on Woods at 8:59.

Rating: B-. More of the same as Hologram is put in there with any star AEW can find, but I’m not sure how much good it’s doing him. It’s not hurting him or anything, but it’s a lot of the same stuff that we’ve seen for a few months now. Hologram needs something of his own and while it’s not too late (or even close), I’m not sure what that is going to be.

The MxM Collection say last week (it was last night on Rampage) they promised to give Max Caster’s jacket a makeover. You’ll see what they’ve done…next week.

Mariah May vs. Lady Frost

Non-title. May blows Nigel McGuinness a kiss and he almost falls out of his chair. The distraction lets Frost grab a rollup for two but May rams her into the buckle a few times. May grabs a Stratusphere but charges into some boots in the corner. A middle rope crossbody gives Frost two but May snaps off a German suplex. May’s knee to the face into Storm Zero finishes at 3:29.

Rating: C. May stacks up another win, though she is still looking for that first big challenger. Yuka Sakazaki doesn’t count as such but it would not surprise me to see Toni Storm show up again after the title match at Grand Slam. For now though, giving May another victory is perfectly logical and about all that can be done.

Video on May vs. Sakazaki.

Willow Nightingale will be watching Grand Slam but Deonna Purrazzo and Taya Valkyrie show up, saying Nightingale isn’t a good friend. Purrazzo offers Yuka Sakazaki protection and we get Nightingale vs. Valkyrie for Rampage.

Acclaimed and Billy Gunn don’t like the MxM Collection, with Max Caster actually rapping again for once.

Video on Darby Allin vs. Jon Moxley with Wheeler Yuta not sure if he should stick with Moxley and company.

Darby Allin vs. Evil Uno

Uno drives him into the corner to start and hammers away, with Alex Reynolds distracting the referee. That lets Uno whip Allin with a belt but Allin fights up and knocks Uno outside. Reynolds offers a distraction though and Allin gets sent into the steps to put him back in trouble. Back in and Allin grabs the Captain’s Hook (bulldog choke) before ripping at Uno’s mask in the corner. Uno is back with a Downward Spiral and Reynolds offers another distraction, earning him a whipping with the belt. Allin Coffin Drops onto the two of them on the floor, setting up the regular version to pin Uno back inside at 5:11.

Rating: C. Just a quick win to give Allin some momentum heading into his match with Jon Moxley at Grand Slam. Heating up Uno for one night didn’t exactly work but being out there for five minutes isn’t going to hurt things. Allin fought through some adversity and won, which is where he tends to shine.

We look at Hangman Page and Jeff Jarrett on Dynamite.

Jarrett promises to fight Page at Grand Slam, even if his wife Karen doesn’t. He proposes a lumberjack strap match because that’s how he was raised.

Queen Aminata vs. Serena Deeb

They start slowly until Deeb takes her down by the wrist. Aminata gets in a quick knockdown for two but Deeb sends her hard into the corner as we take a break. Back with both of them down until Aminata is up with a running boot in the corner. Some suplexes give Aminata two and a release German suplex sends Deeb flying.

The running knee in the ropes gives Aminata two more but Deeb is back with a hammerlock lariat for the same. Deebtox is broken up though and they trade rollups for two each. The big headbutt sends Deb outside but she’s fine enough to grab a dragon screw legwhip over the ropes. Now Deebtox can connect to finish Aminata at 10:25.

Rating: C+. Deeb getting a win is almost weird to see but at least she has some momentum for a change. On the other hand you have Aminata, who felt like she was going to be the next big thing but then she just stopped moving forward. They had a nice match here though, and Deeb can hopefully move on to something bigger.

We look at Saraya challenging Jamie Hayter to a Saraya’s Rules match.

Saraya and Harley Cameron explain the rules: Saraya can do anything and Hayter can’t do anything. Then Cameron eats the rules because she’s odd that way.

Dustin Rhodes and Sammy Guevara are happy to retain their titles but Guevara wants another title. So he’ll face Kazuchika Okada for an eliminator match. Dustin believes in him.

Grizzled Young Veterans/Roderick Strong/Rush/The Beast Mortos vs. Outrunners/FTR/Hook

Drake headlocks Wheeler to start and then runs him over a few times. Back up and Wheeler grabs an armdrag into an armbar. Everything breaks down and Strong gets caught in the big circle of punches as we take a break. Back with Mortos and Harwood striking it out until Mortos knocks him into the corner for the cannonball. Rush comes in for the cocky boot to the face in the corner before it’s Gibson coming in.

That works better for Harwood, who grabs a snap suplex for two. Hook comes in to headlock Gibson but Drake comes in for a shot to the face. Strong chops Hook into the corner as Nigel complains about Schiavone’s lack of professionalism. Hook fights up and cleans house on his own but Mortos gets in a cheap shot so Strong can take over. We take another break and come back with Hook fighting out of a chinlock and escaping a suplex, allowing Floyd to come in.

Everything breaks down and the Paisan Elbow sets up the Shatter Machine (from the Outrunners) for two on Drake. Everything breaks down again and Gibson chokes away on Magnum in the ropes. Strong hits an Irish Curse for two and it’s back to Rush for the running clothesline. Strong grabs the chinlock as commentary talks about Bryan Danielson. Magnum fights up and a double clothesline gives him a needed breather.

The tag is cut off again though and we take another break. Back again with Harwood coming in to fire off the rights and lefts to put various villains down. Triple stereo German suplexes give us a triple near fall before Rush and Harwood chop it out. Mortos breaks up a Shatter Machine and hits a dive, leaving Harwood to get double teamed in the corner. The Bull’s Horns finishes Harwood at 24:17.

Rating: B. The result is a surprise as I was expecting the Outrunners to take the fall here but instead they were out there so the fans can have a good time with one of the most popular teams in the company. Rush continues to get a renewed focus and seeing him get a pin in a TV main event is a big spot.

Serena Deeb wants Britt Baker next week.

Nigel McGuinness is disgusted by the World Champion being a coward. The reality is Bryan Fears Nigel (which is what Nigel’s shirt says) but maybe Bryan should do it for the fans. The fans identify with him but Tony Schiavone interrupts, saying he has had enough of McGuinness. Danielson is not afraid of McGuinness and is only missing because he is not medially cleared.

Schiavone praises Danielson, earning a big threat from Nigel. He doesn’t care how Danielson does it but he wants Danielson in the ring to prove that he is just as good. Danielson knows who the better man is and knows what happens if he shows up at Grand Slam. The ball is in Danielson’s court and Nigel wants him there next week. Nigel is growing more and more unhinged here, which could make for a very interesting showdown.

Overall Rating: B-. The opener and main event were both good but this show was in a tough spot. Grand Slam is all that matters and this show was much more about setting things up for next week. This show was good enough, but everything is going to matter next week and this was little more than a preview/prep show.

Results
Sammy Guevara/Dustin Rhodes b. Kingdom – Swanton off a ladder to Bennett
Conglomeration/Hologram b. Premiere Athletes – Jay Driller to Woods
Mariah May b. Lady Frost – Storm Zero
Darby Allin b. Evil Uno – Coffin Drop
Serena Deeb b. Queen Aminata – Deebtox
Grizzled Young Veterans/Rush/Roderick Strong/The Beast Mortos b. FTR/Hook/Outrunners – Bull’s Horns to Harwood

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Dynamite – September 11, 2024: Oh…No

Dynamite
Date: September 11, 2024
Location: Rupp Arena, Lexington, Kentucky
Commentators: Excalibur, Tony Schiavone, Taz

We are rapidly approaching Grand Slam in New York but it is also the All out fallout show. The big stories were the attempted murders of Bryan Danielson and Swerve Strickland at the hands of Jon Moxley and Hangman Page respectively. Neither of them should be here this week but strange things have happened. Let’s get to it.

I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the video screen slightly to my right. The attendance was very bad, with probably around 2,500 people, though the arena holds over 20,000. Seeing the amount of seats tarped off and empty made me say “wow” when I first walked in.

We open with a clip from All Out, with Jon Moxley explaining that he does not like Bryan Danielson’s ego and attacked him because it is Moxley’s nature. That’s a good enough explanation.

Tony Schiavone is in the ring and brings out the Patriarchy for a chat. Christian Cage has been told that he has “infinite aura” and now that he has the contract for a World Title match, he knows it is undeniable. When he saw Killswitch grab him by the throat, he knew that he had the perfect monster under his control. The fans chant LUCHASAURUS as Cage talks about how he’s coming for Bryan Danielson. The beating he’ll give Danielson will make his wife Brie wish she was the one with CTE. Cage makes it clear that he is the UNDISPUTED next World Champion.

Don Callis cashes in his favor with Will Ospreay to team with Kyle Fletcher for tonight’s Casino Tag Team Gauntlet Match. Fletcher talks Ospreay into doing it, saying there is no one he would rather team with t do this. As Mark Davis continues to become less and less important.

TNT Title: Jack Perry vs. Lio Rush

Perry is defending and comes to the ring in his Scapegoatmobile while Rush just has Action Andretti. Perry jumps him to start and the beatdown is on in the corner but Rush fights up with a dropkick to the floor. Rush tries a moonsault to the floor but gets dropped onto the apron for the crash as we take a break.

Back with Rush fighting out of a chinlock but getting dropped, which is enough for Andretti to come after him. That’s enough for an ejection but Rush fights up and hits a running Spanish Fly for two. Perry lawn darts him into the buckle though and a snapdragon puts Rush down again. Rush is right back with a poisonrana for a breather but Perry breaks up the springboard Stunner. The running knee finishes for Perry at 8:39.

Rating: C+. This was the way to give Perry some momentum back after his loss on Saturday and could have been a lot worse. Perry is far more tolerable when he stays around this level, which unfortunately does not happen very often. I’m not sure why Rush got this show but there were worse options to come after the title.

Perry goes to leave, saying people like him are crucified in this life so they can be glorified in the next.

We look at Hangman Page beating Swerve Strickland at a rather horrible level at All Out.

Page talks about how he has gone this far to beat Strickland and he would have spent an eternity in pain for a chance to hurt Strickland. Now if anyone stood in the way of him and his revenge, he is coming for them too. Page walks over and glares at Top Flight/Action Andretti before seeing the Dark Order, who don’t know him anymore. Then he runs into Jeff Jarrett, who says Page went too far when he put his hands on Jeff’s wife. The fight is on and has to be broken up.

Private Party and Komander come out for a match….and get jumped by the Blackpool Combat Club. Pac talks about how this company is broken and diplomacy has failed.

The Learning Tree arrives in a Bentley with a HI GUYS license plate. They’re going to show what they found in Orange Cassidy’s backpack tonight.

Ricochet vs. Sammy Guevara

They trade strikes to start until Ricochet sends him outside for the big running flip dive. The fight heads to the stage with Ricochet being sent into part of the set, allowing Guevara t moonsault off the tunnel as we take a break (note that they have been on the floor for 1:13 before the break and the ten count has not even started).

Back with Ricochet being sent to the floor (Fan: “Sorry.”) and into the barricade. Ricochet fights up and hits a jumping flip dive off the barricade) that was great) for two back inside. The Benydriller is countered into a Canadian Destroyer and Guevara hits a top rope cutter for two more. Guevara’s GTH misses and Ricochet kicks him in the head, setting up an ax kick stomp (egads) into Vertigo for the pin at 10:54.

Rating: B. This was definitely a better showing from Ricochet, who got to do his usual stuff and beat someone with some stature. It’s good to have Guevara back, but he has definitely lost a lot of his status in his hiatus. The flips were good and that ax kick stomp was awesome, making this a good match with Ricochet looking like a star.

Post match the Beast Mortos runs in to spar Ricochet, with Guevara making the save.

We look back at Kris Statlander beating Willow Nightingale in the Chicago street fight.

Kazuchika Okada mocks his title defense on Saturday when Konosuke Takeshita and Don Callis come in and want the Continental Title shot. Okada seems interested, complete with the b****.

Here is Darby Allin (to the reaction of the night, with people rising to their feet) for a chat. He gets right to the point and calls out Jon Moxley, who comes to the ring with Marina Shafir. Moxley talks about how nothing has changed between them but Allin cuts him off. Allin talks about how he was a homeless dishwasher and everything he owned fit in the trunk of his car. That’s why he wrestles the way he does and he loved what he saw in Moxley, who wouldn’t change for anyone.

They first wrestled in a high school gym and Allin was so nervous. Then he saw what Allin did to Bryan Danielson, which Allin could never do to someone like Sting. So what does Moxley want? It turns out Moxley wants Allin’s World Title shot at Grand Slam, because Danielson is going to be out of commission. Allin: “What are you stupid? You get dropped on your head? You been drinking again?”

After that gasp from the crowd, the fans hear Allin say Moxley has to earn it, with Moxley offering to earn it in New York. Allin accepts the challenge for Grand Slam, presumably with the title shot on the line. That’s quite the bait and switch for Grand Slam, which sold tickets based off the idea of the title match.

Nigel McGuinness interrupts Christopher Daniels and wants to talk to Tony Khan.

Commentary talks about September 11, which is a nice touch that would be nicer if it was going to a break instead of crammed between matches.

Mariah May vs. Queen Aminata

Non-title. They both miss some kicks to start and trade rollups for two each. An exchange of strikes to the face goes to Aminata but May ties her in the ropes and hammers away. We take a break and come back with May hitting a missile dropkick into the corner. Aminata kicks her away again and snaps off some suplexes. The running boot against the ropes gives Aminata two but May is back with a hanging DDT for two of her own. May’s running knee into Storm Zero finishes at 8:26.

Rating: C+. Not bad here with May getting a win, but she’s still missing a little something since she won the title. She’s still a good heel and is good at talking down to people but it’s not quite clicking. At the same time, Aminata seemed a bit shaky here and it wouldn’t surprise me if she was banged up somewhere in there.

Post match May lays on the mat with the belt and says she needs to have her championship celebration, but she wants Mina Shirakawa back too.

The Young Bucks mock the fans who say they want a new team to come after them. That’s why they have booked the tag team gauntlet match for tonight.

Learning Tree vs. Jacked Jameson/Iron Savages

Boulder knocks Jericho into the corner to start so it’s off to Bill for the big forearms. Everything breaks down and Jameson is booted in the face. Keith adds Diamond Dust and Jericho’s arrogant cover gets the pin at 2:27.

Post match Jericho goes on a rant about how he wants his $7000 back from Orange Cassidy, which is why he took the backpack. Inside the backpack is a picture of Cassidy and the former Best Friends. Cassidy pops up on screen and says he has the money. Cue Mark Briscoe driving a big machine full of coins, which he pours into Jericho’s fancy car. Cassidy adds some cash and that should be it. Fans: “KEEP THE CHANGE!” Pouring a bunch of coins into a car seems more mildly inconvenient than anything else.

Here is Nigel McGuinness for a chat. There is not going to be a World Title match at Grand Slam, which must be a breath of air for Bryan Danielson. Like when he let go of choking Justin Roberts with his tie. The World Champion should be in action at Grand Slam, which brings him to the contract he has in his hand. The success that he has should be his and Tony Khan has made the match. At Grand Slam, it’s Danielson vs. McGuinness. So if he can have that match, why can’t he have the Allin match?

Hook wants Roderick Strong for the FTW Title.

Here are the Young Bucks, in AEW office chairs, to watch the main event.

Tag Team Casino Gauntlet

First fall wins and there is no guarantee that all of the teams get in. FTR is in at #1 and Kyle Fletcher/Will Ospreay are in at #2. Ospreay snaps off a hurricanrana to Wheeler to start but a sitout powerbomb gives Harwood two. Fletcher is knocked outside and the PowerPlex gets two. The Righteous are in at #3 and a Boss Man Slam into a Swanton gets two on Wheeler. Fletcher is back in to clean some of the house until the Kingdom is in at #4.

Fletcher gets knocked down to start and a running knee gets two on Ospreay as we take a break. Back with the Acclaimed coming in at #5 (the fans approve) and cleaning house. An AA gets two on Dutch and a pair of Fameassers put Harwood down. The MxM Collection is in at #6 to a big reaction of their own. Everyone brawls until the good guys manage a triple suplex. We take another break and come back with everyone brawling on the floor again with Top Flight coming in at #7.

This time they get to clear the ring until Ospreay kicks Dante in the head. The Shatter Machine hits Bowens but everyone makes the save. The Outrunners are in at #8 and the fans are way into them as well. This time they clean house as well, including the Paisan elbow to Vincent. The Grizzled Young Veterans are in at #8 as Floyd superplexes Mansoor onto the pile at ringside. We hit the parade of secondary finishers inside until Dante’s top rope splash hits raised knees. Ospreay hits the Hidden Blade on Dante to give Fletcher the pin at 22:14.

Rating: C+. This was the weakest of these matches so far as the strength of the matches comes from the surprises and we didn’t have any here. The Outrunners and the Collection got big reactions but it was the makeshift tam winning to continue the “Ospreay is really good at these things” deal. It wasn’t a bad match, but it felt long and was just a bunch of people doing stuff at times.

Overall Rating: C. This was not great by any means and was one of the weaker Dynamites in a good while. There was nothing worth going out of your way to see and the whole Danielson/Nigel/Allin/Moxley stuff is feeling very much like a bait and switch. This show did not feel like fallout from All Out, which was going to be hard to do with so many people missing. It wasn’t a terrible show, but you didn’t need to see it and that’s not a good way to go in this spot.

Results
Jack Perry b. Lio Rush – Running knee
Ricochet b. Sammy Guevara – Vertigo
Mariah May b. Queen Aminata – Storm Zero
Learning Tree b. Jacked Jameson/Iron Savages – Diamond Dust to Jameson
Will Ospreay/Kyle Fletcher won the Tag Team Casino Gauntlet Match

 

 

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