Great American Bash 2008 (2024 Edition): See You Next Show

Great American Bash 2008
Date: July 20, 2008
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 12,454
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We’re wrapping up the period before the Summerslam build here and the card is one sided to put it mildly. The Smackdown side is pretty much Edge challenging HHH for the Smackdown World Title, plus a four way Tag Team Title match. On the other side, Raw has John Cena vs. JBL in a parking lot fight, CM Punk defending the Raw World Title against Batista and Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho in a grudge match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Vickie Guerrero and Edge’s wedding, plus HHH revealing that Edge cheated on her the night before to end Smackdown. The other big matches get some attention of their own.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Edgeheads vs. Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Jesse and Festus

Miz and Morrison are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Festus clears the ring as tends to be his custom before Hornswoggle comes in for a stare…uh, up. Hornswoggle rolls up his sleeves but opts to dive onto Miz and Morrison instead. We settle down to Jesse monkey flipping Miz and knocking him down again for two. Festus beats on Miz as well before handing it off to Finlay. Morrison comes in and actually takes over on Finlay before bringing Miz back in for a chinlock.

It’s back to Morrison for his own chinlock as JR continues his Morrison to Rick Rude comparisons. Finlay fights up and double legs Miz down before doing the same thing to beat on Morrison. They collide in the corner so Ryder tags himself in to hammer Finlay down. The neck crank doesn’t last long on Finlay so Hawkins comes in to keep Finlay in trouble.

The Celtic Cross hits Hawkins and a shillelagh shot gets two, with Miz and Morrison making the save. Hawkins grabs a chinlock but Finlay is back up again, this time getting over to Hornswoggle to pick up the pace. Jesse tags himself in just as fast though and the fans are not pleased with the lack of Hornswoggle. Hawkins comes back in for a cheap shot on Hornswoggle but it’s back to Festus to really clean house. Miz and Morrison are sent outside and Hawkins breaks up the Rocket Launcher to pin Jesse and win the titles.

Rating: C+. It was a fast paced opener with a bunch of moving parts but they managed to keep the focus on just a few people at a time until the ending. Hawkins and Ryder winning the titles is the right way to go as Miz and Morrison have gotten everything they can out of them and La Familia is still the biggest thing on Smackdown. Give the team some more gold, as it’s not like Jesse and Festus or Hornswoggle/Finlay are worth anything.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and is quickly taken to the mat to start. A small package gives Hardy two as well as a breather but Benjamin is right back with a headlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as they’re certainly starting slowly. Benjamin sends him to the apron for a ram into the post, setting up the armbar back inside. A gutbuster sets up the seated abdominal stretch as commentary talks about Benjamin’s aggression, despite there being nothing to suggest it exists here.

Hardy fights up and tries a Side Effect but gets planted with something like an STO. Back up and Hardy blocks Paydirt to start the comeback and hits the bulldog out of the corner. Hardy’s middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a heck of a buckle bomb and they’re both down. A Side Effect gives Hardy two but the moonsault…I think it was supposed to hit knees but Hardy overshot it anyway. Paydirt gives Benjamin the pin and the title.

Rating: C. The match was far from bad, but it wasn’t exactly thrilling, as it came off as more of a house show match. The ending didn’t help things either as commentary had to scramble to cover Hardy missing. It’s not like hardy was doing anything with the title anyway so switching it over to Benjamin works as well as anything else.

We see an interview from Monday, with CM Punk talking about how he’s always been the underdog. It’s not about your size or muscle and he’s in the business of proving everyone wrong, which is what he’s always done.

We look at HHH revealing that Edge cheated on Vickie Guerrero the day before their wedding.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Henry is defending and has Tony Atlas in his corner while Dreamer has Colin Delaney. Dreamer charges at him and is quickly shoved into the corner, with Henry throwing him around again for a bonus. A hard clothesline puts Dreamer down again and Henry steps on his head as a few BORING chants start up.

Henry works on the arm (which is code for he leans over and grabs the wrist), Dreamer fights up, Henry takes him down and works on the arm again. The splash misses though and Dreamer hits the basement dropkick but has to escape the World’s Strongest Slam. The DDT puts Henry down and Dreamer goes up for no apparent reason, allowing Delaney to pull him down. Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam to retain.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of everything that is wrong with ECW. First of all, there was no reason to believe Dreamer was going to take the title. He hasn’t been nearly that important for a long time now and it wasn’t going to change here. Second, the Delaney turn doesn’t mean much as he’s a loser who didn’t exactly become a star when he was with Dreamer. Third, the match was really boring, which is quite ECW in a lot of ways. Rather dull stuff here and by far the worst thing on the show.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels, and thank goodness as the show needs it. Jericho claimed Michaels is a hypocrite (and was kind of right) and then took out his eye. Now Michaels is back for revenge and to prove that no matter what Jericho does, Michaels will always be better.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

They lock up to start and thankfully drop that in all of two seconds to start hitting each other in the face. Shawn gets the better of things with some chops and knocks Jericho into the corner before going after the leg. The reverse Figure Four has Jericho in early trouble but he’s in the ropes pretty quickly. Shawn stays on the leg and the referee stops things for a second to check on Jericho in the corner.

Jericho is fine enough to send Shawn over the corner and out to the apron, with Shawn favoring his back. The knee is fine enough to hit a triangle dropkick out to the floor before Jericho takes him inside for a double arm crank. With that broken up, Jericho dives into an atomic drop and Shawn drops him with the flying forearm. Shawn nips up but Jericho pulls him straight into the Walls, which is counter you don’t see very often.

This time Shawn makes the rope so Jericho loads up the bulldog, only to get dropped with a clothesline for two. The top rope elbow is broken up but Shawn wins a fight on top and now the elbow connects. Cue Lance Cade to break up the superkick but Shawn blocks the Codebreaker. They slug it out again until Shawn hiptosses him out onto Cade for the big crash. Naturally Shawn is right there with a moonsault onto the two of them and everyone is down again.

Back in and Shawn’s bad eye is busted open, with commentary not being sure when it was cut. Naturally Jericho goes right after the eye and knocks him into the ropes, where Cade gets in the cheap shot. The very bloody Shawn manages to pull him into a crossface but Jericho pulls him into the buckle for the violent escape. The referee wants to stop it but Shawn begs him not to, meaning Jericho is right back on the eye. Shawn is COVERED in blood and does the “pull myself up on the other guy’s tights” spot, only to have Jericho punch him down again and hammer away….until the referee finally stops it.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but there is almost no one better than Shawn at making you think he was dying in front of your eyes. Shawn was trying to fight and was still in there until the injury flared up again, along with Cade offering the distraction. This felt like the big middle piece in a bigger story and they pulled me in with the emotion and hatred. Awesome match and we’re almost certainly not done yet.

We get the emotional exit for Shawn, who has to be helped out.

Edge is really not pleased with HHH for violating his privacy and taking away his personal life. All Edge has left is his professional life and tonight, he will be extra dangerous.

Divas Title: Michelle McCool vs. Natalya

For the inaugural title but commentary is to busy talking about Edge/Vickie Guerrero. They grapple to the mat to start as commentary compares McCool to softball star Jennie Finch. Natalya wheelbarrow drops her throat first over the top to take over and we hit the surfboard to stay on McCool’s….well various parts. McCool powers out so Natalya switches to the Sharpshooter. That’s broken up as well and this time McCool pulls her into the heel hook for the title.

Rating: C-. These two were in the death slot as there was almost no way they were going to be able to follow the previous match. It doesn’t help that the match was almost a Natalya squash until McCool got in her one hold for the win. It’s rather nice for the women on Smackdown to have something to do, but they could use some more blood in the division or it is going to turn old fast.

Post match here is Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying you need to save your ticket stubs because this is the night of Shawn Michaels’ last match. Shawn has a detached retina and that means his career is over. It shows that the good guys win and the wicked are punished and the worst has finally come for Shawn. Jericho was feeling the evil here and it worked.

We recap CM Punk defending the World Title against Batista. Punk won Money In The Bank and used it to become champion, meaning he needs to prove himself worthy. Batista doesn’t seem to be overly intimidated so Punk is extra motivated.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and we go old school with a weapons check. Batista powers him around to start and Punk realizes he might need another plan. Some kicks to the legs slow Batista down but he elbows Punk in the face to cut him off. An enziguri knocks Batista outside and Punk follows him outside with a suicide dive.

Back in and Punk strikes away, only to be run over to give Batista two. The camel clutch goes on to keep Punk in trouble, which is broken up as camel clutches tend to be. Punk gets up a shot to the face in the corner and hits a high crossbody for two. The Batista Bomb is countered but a powerslam isn’t, meaning Punk has to counter the Bomb again.

Punk hits the running knee in the corner but can’t hit the GTS, instead settling for the springboard clothesline. The Anaconda Vice (been a minute since Punk used that) is broken up and Batista hits a heck of a clothesline. Batista’s charge hits the post and he falls outside, where he is able to catch a diving Punk with a spinebuster. Cue Kane to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They were starting to get somewhere but then just stopped for the DQ ending. This is either setting up a triple threat (erg) or Punk vs. Batista II, but Punk needs to win something on a big stage. It was bad enough that he got the title via Money In The Bank, but he’s lucky to crack the top five stars on Raw. This didn’t help things, though I guess Batista needed to be kept strong. Granted that makes me wonder why he was in the match in the first place, but I can picture Vince’s “oh it’s fine” face from here so we’ll move o.

Post match Kane lays out Punk, Batista, and a production worker. With Kane gone, Batista hits the Batista Bomb on Punk to make things even worse for the champ. Somehow this is a double DQ, despite Kane not touching Punk before the bell.

We recap John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield. With Vince McMahon gone, JBL has declared martial law but Cena isn’t having it. Now they’re going to fight in a parking lot.

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

This is taking place in the parking lot in a circle of cars and JBL shows up in his limo, fighting in most of a suit. There’s no Cena to start so JBL gets on a hood, only to have Cena pop up in another car and ram into him. Cena chokes him with a cord and then slams a car hood onto JBL’s back. Some jumper cables to the crotch set up some electrocution and JBL screams a lot.

JBL is put on another hood and Cena throws a well placed keg, only to hit windshield. With JBL trying to drive away, Cena grabs him for some rams into the horn. JBL fights back to little avail but manages to whip Cena through a car door, knocking it off the hinges. Cena gets punched off a car for two and then sent through the windshield of another for the big crash.

A crowbar shot misses for JBL and Cena slugs away but JBL sends him through a window. With nothing else working, JBL goes to grab some gasoline (with his limo rolling away) and douses one of the cars (with Cena inside). The car is lit on fire and promptly extinguished, with an annoyed looking Cena getting out. JBL goes over to a forklift but Cena is there to send him into another car.

Now Cena gets in the forklift and gores said car, only to lift it up and carry it into the arena. Commentary kicks in as Cena knocks JBL around and plants him with the ProtoBomb onto the stage. Cena loads up the FU but walks JBL over to the edge of the stage, only to take too long as JBL slips off. JBL sends him off the stage and through a windshield for the upset win.

Rating: C-. This was quite the situation and I wasn’t wild on most of it. They had a bunch of slow brawling in the back with car stuff before coming to the arena for a few minutes. JBL had to get a win of some sort but egads this means we’re going to have to hear him talk even more, which is about as painful of a thought as I can imagine. Not exactly great here, but what are you expecting from JBL?

We recap Edge vs. HHH for the latter’s Smackdown World Title. Vickie Guerrero gave Edge the title shot before their wedding but then Edge cheated on her the day before said wedding, with HHH revealing Edge’s, uh, indiscretion. Now it’s about the title, though Edge is more than a bit distracted.

HHH has no regrets over what he did.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Edge

HHH is defending and we get the Big Match Intros with a weapons check. Edge charges right at him and hammers away but gets sent outside. HHH sends him outside and grabs a neck snap across the top. A ram int the buckle has Edge on the floor again but he knocks a diving HHH out of the air. Back in and Edge hits the running shoulder in the corner before sending him outside for a whip into the steps.

A drop onto the announcers’ table keeps HHH’s ribs in trouble and Edge grabs a bodyscissors back inside. HHH fights up but gets dropkicked to the apron, where he sidesteps a spear to send Edge crashing to the floor. Back in and HHH slugs away before they go outside (again) with Edge going into the post. Edge is right back up though and grabs the Impaler on the floor, which means a rather delayed cover gets two.

HHH hits his own DDT for his own two but the Pedigree is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. The spear only hits buckle but Edge’s big boot only hits HHH’s jaw, leaving them both down again. Back up and the spear is countered into the spinebuster to give HHH a much needed breather. The Pedigree is countered again, this time with a ram into the corner. Edge takes him up top for a superplex but here is wedding planner Alicia Fox to send in the title. Cue Vickie Guerrero to take Alicia down and the catfight is on in the ring. The spear hits Vickie by mistake, allowing HHH to grab the Pedigree for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. It was good but they never came close to hitting that really high level. At the same time, it didn’t help that this was more about the Vickie/Edge stuff, with the title just kind of being there on the side. These two feel like they should have had their first big match on a more important show, but at least what they got to do here did work. It just could have been a pretty good bit better.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a perfectly fine show that should have been better than it was. There were some big matches on the card and those matches worked, but the lower card stuff is completely forgettable, even with three new champions being crowned. It’s a show where things happened, but it’s not a show that felt important. Instead, it came off like a “the big one is next time”, which doesn’t make for the most enjoyable event.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 18, 2008: Stiff Trapezoids

Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – February 22, 2008: Fix The Monster Problem

Smackdown
Date: February 22, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with No Way Out and Edge is still the World Champion, meaning he is set to defend the title against the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. That could be in for a long build and the question now is what else will be on the Wrestlemania card. They have some work to do to get it ready so let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

We look at Undertaker winning the Elimination Chamber to become #1 contender.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and the Edgeheads to get things going. Edge brags about retaining the World Title at No Way Out because the three of them hurt Rey Mysterio last week in Chile. Now he is on to Wrestlemania to face the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, where Edge wants to cement his legacy by ending the Streak. Edge has his own Wrestlemania undefeated streak and something has to give. He goes against the impossible and succeeds, which is why he will succeed.

For fifteen years, everyone has asked who will finally defeat the Undertaker (eh, more like the last seven or eight) and he will not fall. This year it all ends because he is that man. Then the gong strikes and here is Undertaker to beat up the Edgeheads, who offer enough of a distraction for Edge to escape. Perfectly fine first segment for the feud.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Shelton powers him into the corner to start and drives some shoulders to the ribs. Yang fights out, only to get buckle bombed HARD into the corner. The chinlock goes on for a bit before a t-bone suplex cuts off Yang’s comeback. A backbreaker keeps Yang in trouble before Benjamin puts him up top. Yang shoves him away, only to have Benjamin jump up to the top for an overhead belly to belly superplex.

Another buckle bomb is countered with a hurricanrana and a spinning headscissors drops Benjamin again. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two on Benjamin, followed by a sunset flip out of the corner for the same. That’s enough for Benjamin, who avoids the moonsault press and hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C. Yang is a good example of someone who has been built up well enough to be a bit of a headache for Benjamin. There was no way Yang was going to get in a match like Money In The Bank, but at least they didn’t have the match be total dominance. This was a completely watchable match and that’s more than I was expecting.

Teddy Long runs into the returning Maryse, who says she hasn’t been around for a long time. She would like to ask him something….in his office.

Jesse And Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Festus headbutts Deuce down to start and it’s off to Jesse for a drop toehold. Jesse sends him outside but a Cherry distraction lets Domino get in a cheap shot. We hit the chinlock back inside (with Jesse looking like he is tapping) before Jesse is draped over the top for a forearm to the back from Domino. Back up and Festus adds a headbutt from the apron, allowing Jesse to hit his own headbutt. That’s enough for the hot tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. A Rocket Launcher finishes Domino.

Rating: C. Festus is a fun act, but you can only get so much out of the idea of Jesse does a regular match and then tags Festus to wreck things. That doesn’t have the longest shelf life and it is already starting to lose steam. Festus has something with the idea, but there is only so much that can be done with what is basically a one man team.

Raw Rebound.

Video on the South American tour.

Big Daddy V. vs. Shannon Moore

Matt Striker is here with V. Moore gets shoved down to start and his kicks just annoy V a bit more. The swinging Boss Man Slam plants Moore and V sends him flying again. A missed charge lets Moore kick away a few times until V runs him own. The really big elbow finishes Moore off.

Rating: D+. If WWE insists on pushing V as the monster over and over, he needs a win like this every so often. This was almost a total squash and Moore probably got in more than he should have. Moore getting crushed isn’t a bad thing, but V has lost so much that it has me wondering how many more times they can keep reheating him.

MVP vs. Batista

Non-title. During his entrance, we get an inset promo from MVP, saying Batista can’t beat him twice in a row. Batista drives him into the corner to start before going with a boot into MVP’s banged up back. MVP manages to send him face first into the buckle though and a forearm to the back of the head drops Batista for a change.

The running big boot to the side of the head knocks Batista off the apron and MVP hammers away back inside. We hit the chinlock so Batista fights up, only to get sent right back to the floor in a bit of a surprise. The front facelock goes on back inside, setting up a facebuster for two on Batista. That doesn’t last long though as Batista is back with three straight spinebusters and the Batista Bomb finishes fast.

Rating: C. Oh yeah MVP is in that bad place, as he is losing over and over again while still US Champion. In other words, WWE seems to think that he is bulletproof and that means he is going to lose more and more. Why Batista needed to beat him again isn’t the most clear concept, but I would bet on a reaction of “oh well” as they move on.

We get a medical update on Hornswoggle after he got beaten down so badly on Raw. Naturally we see the beatdown, which commentary describes as so horrible.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Kane slugs away to start and gets hit in the face for his efforts. Khali gets knocked back into the corner but a clothesline of his own puts Kane back down. The slugout continues with Kane hitting an uppercut but getting caught going up top. We hit the nerve hold and then the Vice Grip but Kane kicks off the corner and falls backwards for the pin.

Rating: D. It was a bunch of punches and chops before the fluke ending to keep Khali looking strong. Kane was trying here but what exactly is he supposed to do in a situation like this? Khali continues to be so limited in the ring, but much like Big Daddy V, it stops meaning anything when he loses over and over again.

Video on the Streak.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Matt Jackson

Yes that Matt Jackson and Palumbo runs him over with a clothesline to start. Jackson hits a dropkick as Michelle McCool is watching in the back. Palumbo knocks him to the floor for a fall away slam, followed by a clothesline back inside. The Full Throttle finishes Jackson fast.

Here is Rey Mysterio for an update on his health. Rey gets right to the point: he has a torn bicep and needs surgery. Unfortunately the surgery will take place this weekend, so he won’t be at Wrestlemania. If this is the last time that he is going to be in the ring for a long time, there is no better place to be than in San Diego.

Cue Vickie Guerrero to say she doesn’t care if Rey is hurt because he ruined her moment last week. We see Rey “accidentally” hitting Vickie with a springboard seated senton last week and Rey still isn’t very sorry. Vickie doesn’t want to hear it, but Rey has a match RIGHT NOW, injury or not.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title. Chavo charges at him to start and hammers away with Rey falling around the ring. Rey manages a hurricanrana but gets faceplanted to cut that off in a hurry. We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the arm. Rey even has to go to the ropes to escape, leaving Chavo to baseball slide him to the floor. Back in and Rey manages another headscissors, setting up the running seated senton off the apron.

Chavo catches Rey up top back inside, only to get knocked down to set up a top rope seated senton. The basement dropkick gets two more and the 619 has Chavo down. Rey’s arm won’t let him hit the springboard though, allowing Chavo to catch him on top. Three Amigos have Rey in trouble but he avoids the frog splash, allowing Rey to come back with a sunset flip for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Given Rey’s injury, this went about as well as it could have gone. That being said, it doesn’t say much when Chavo, the reigning ECW Champion, knew this was coming and was healthy but still lost anyway. WWE already hasn’t exactly made ECW look good and now it is even worse with this latest development as Rey is on the way out.

Post match Vickie says it’s her turn to hurt Rey….so here is Big Show to lay Rey out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Edge vs. Undertaker is going to be fine but they didn’t exactly do anything to start another feud here. Rey was written off due to his injury for the sake of crushing him in his hometown, but we knew he was already heading off for surgery. Throw in a bunch of pretty ok at best matches and there just wasn’t much worth seeing as we start the Road To Wrestlemania.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 15, 2008: Make It Stop

Smackdown
Date: February 15, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,307
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the go home show for No Way Out and that probably means we are going to be seeing more between the people involved in the Elimination Chamber. Other than that, Edge vs. Rey Mysterio II needs more of a build, though I’m not sure how much more there is to do with the feud. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. MVP

Non-title. MVP gets backed into the corner to start before Batista drops him with a shoulder. That’s enough for a breather on the floor as MVP needs a break. Back in and some slams send MVP right back to the floor, followed by a running boot to the head back inside. Batista switches things up a bit by going after the leg, with commentary debating if that is a callback to MVP going after Ric Flair’s leg or just, you know, trying to hurt MVP before the Chamber. The Figure Four would suggest it’s a bit of both but MVP makes it to the rope as we take a break.

Back with Batista driving the shoulders to the ribs in the corner but MVP sends him shoulder first into the post. MVP stomps him down in the corner before getting smart by staying on the arm. The kick to the head gives MVP two and we hit the armbar. They head outside with Batista being sent into the steps but Batista is back with a ram into the apron. Back in and MVP gets smart by sending him shoulder first into the post again. That’s fine with Batista, who uses the good shoulder for a spear. The Batista Bomb puts MVP away.

Rating: C+. I liked the match layout as they had MVP try to wear Batista down for Sunday, which makes sense, but my goodness can we stop having the US Champion get pinned? It’s one of the most annoying things in all of wrestling and it feels like it has been happening on a pretty regular basis as of late. You couldn’t have had him walk out of get disqualified here? That shouldn’t be too much to ask.

Edge gives the Edgeheads a quick and mostly useless pep talk.

Deuce N Domino/Edgeheads vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore/Jesse and Festus

The bell rings and Festus cleans house, as he is known to do. Jesse knocks Ryder down for two and it’s off to Moore, who gets taken into the wrong corner. The beatdown is on and the villains start taking turns beating Moore up. Moore kicks Domino away though and the hot tag brings in Yang to clean house. Everything breaks down and Yang’s moonsault press finishes Domino fast.

Post match the bell rings and the villains beat everyone down….until Jesse rings the bell and Festus gets to wreck everyone again. Another bell rings calms things right back down.

Vickie Guerrero gets her makeup done in the hopes that Edge pops the question later.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria

Hold on though as here is Chuck Palumbo to watch and Michelle is shaken. Palumbo revs his motorcycle a lot and Victoria chokes in the corner. Michelle’s superplex attempt is broken up as she is distracted again, allowing Victoria to punch her in the face a few times. They crash out to the floor as the revving continues/grows even louder. Back in and Michelle hits a clothesline but more revving lets Victoria hit the Widow’s Peak for the pin.

Post match Palumbo threatens McCool and Jamie Noble some more.

We recap Undertaker choking people, namely Big Daddy V, out in recent weeks.

Undertaker vs. Big Daddy V

Matt Striker is here with V, who shoves Undertaker into the corner to start. It works so well that V does it again but Undertaker starts striking away. Undertaker goes to the arm until a Striker distraction lets V get in the rather large clothesline. With Undertaker down on the floor, Striker gets in a kick to the back and V sends Undertaker face first into the steps. After the weird mounting thing, V misses a charge in the corner and gets clotheslined down. Old School connects and a running DDT gives Undertaker the pin.

Rating: D. How many times can Undertaker beat this guy? I think we’ve gotten the point by now, as the video package before the match showed you just how dominant Undertaker has been in this mini feud. I’m not sure why they needed to have V lose clean again here, but it’s not like anyone was buying him as a threat in the Chamber anyway.

Post match Striker yells a lot so Undertaker chokes him out.

Edge is rather nervous.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

No Way Out rundown.

Kane/CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero/Shelton Benjamin

Kane and Chavo start things off and it’s a gorilla press to get things going. I’ll let you figure out who pressed who as Punk comes in to stomp Chavo down in the corner. It’s off to Benjamin, who gets dropkicked down but manages to come right back with a t-bone suplex. Chavo gets launched into a splash on Punk for two and the villains take over. That doesn’t last long either though as it’s back to Kane for the house cleaning. Benjamin saves Chavo from a near fall and gets choked for his efforts, with Chavo having to make his own save. Everything breaks down and the GTS finishes Chavo.

Rating: C. Just a way to get Chavo and Punk in the ring again as that feud continues to exist for reasons of….I guess necessity? There isn’t anyone else for Chavo to defend against at the moment so this is about as good as WWE can do for him. That works for a bit, but the impact falls off when they have fought roughly 184 times so far.

Raw Rebound.

Video on Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Vince McMahon.

Great Khali vs. Finlay

Khali wastes no time in taking him down into the corner for some choking but a neck snap across the rope gives Finlay a breather. Not that it matters as Khali takes him outside and keeps up the beating. Back in and Khali grabs a slam and then a nerve hold, which lasts slightly less long than average. Back up and Finlay avoids a charge in the corner but Khali drops him again. Hornswoggle offers a distraction though and Finlay gets in some shillelagh shots for the pin.

Rating: D+. You can only get so much out of a short match like this one and they didn’t exactly do anything good with it. Finlay beating up Khali with the shillelagh is something that has been done more than once and much like V, there was no reason to believe that Khali was going to win in the Chamber. Finlay isn’t likely going to get much higher than this, but I can go for him being a solid midcard hand who gets a win like this every now and then.

The ring is geared up for the potential proposal. There are balloons, flowers, a string quartet and….well nothing more but do you need anything else? Here is Edge, to some nice string music, and he is looking nervous. Edge talks about how he has never been nervous before but he is really in love. He invites Vickie out here, with Teddy Long getting to push the wheelchair again.

With Teddy gone, Edge says the World Title meant a lot to him, but there is something more important. Edge proposes and gives her the ring, which gets him a yes. Cue Rey Mysterio to interrupt and say he hopes that Vickie drops the Guerrero name. Edge threatens to put Rey in the wheelchair if he doesn’t apologize right now so Rey gets in the ring and apologizes in Spanish. Oh and he’ll win the title on Sunday. The fight is on and the springboard seated sent hits Vickie by mistake. Rey is….sorry? Maybe? Eh Vickie getting humiliated is always worth a look.

Overall Rating: C. Oh yeah they need to get past No Way Out fast because this isn’t exactly working. There is only so much that you can do with the same people doing the same stuff over and over, even if it does at least build things up for the Elimination Chamber. Rey vs. Edge is rapidly turning into Rey vs. Vickie and that is only going to get them so far. It wasn’t a bad show, but it’s a show that is going to need a pit stop really soon.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – November 27, 2007: Mini Monster Mash

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 27, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re almost to the end of the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean around here. ECW is in need of something different and unfortunately I think we have already gotten that. Kane and Big Daddy V seem to be the next big things, though some of the Smackdown people can help. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla

Layla chokes on the rope to start and we are firmly in catfight mode. Cue Balls Mahoney for a distraction though, allowing Kelly to grab a rollup for the fast pin.

Video on Big Daddy V.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. The bell rings and Festus chases Miz and Morrison off but we settle down to Jesse working on Morrison’s arm. A running dropkick to the side of the head gets two and it’s off to Festus for a splash. Jesse is slammed onto Morrison for two more so Miz comes in, only to get front facelocked. Morrison tries to make a save but gets glared at by Festus, who clotheslines both of them out to the floor.

After Jesse’s dive onto Miz and Morrison and a break, we come back with Morrison hitting a slingshot elbow for two on Jesse. The chinlock with a knee in Jesse’s back keeps him in trouble and we hit something like a cobra clutch. Jesse finally gets up and rolls away, allowing the hot tag to Festus to clean house. The rocket launch forearm hits Jesse for two but Morrison is back in with a cheap shot for the quick pin.

Rating: C. Watchable enough match as Miz and Morrison continue to clean out what limited competition that they have. There still isn’t enough to make a full on division but even a few teams are better than champions and their challengers of the month. Outsmarting Jesse and Festus is the best way to go with them, though I’m waiting on someone to just grab the bell and ring it to cut him off.

Video on Kane.

We look back at the women’s match.

Smackdown Rebound.

Elijah Burke introduces Shelton Benjamin, who wants to be ECW World Champion.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Shannon Moore

Benjamin twists the arm and grabs a belly to belly to start, setting up a t-bone suplex. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Moore flips out of a suplex. A slingshot something is countered into the jumping Downward Spiral to give Benjamin another fast win.

Rating: C-. What else can you say here? It’s a squash for Benjamin, who seems to be the newest star who is going to be added to the show for the sake of bolstering the roster. That is what ECW needs, and even though Benjamin’s blond hair is a bad idea, it’s nice to see Benjamin getting another chance. Nothing match, but what else were you expecting?

Kane vs. Big Daddy V

Extreme Rules and Matt Striker is here with V. Kane slugs away but his running clothesline doesn’t do him much good. V sends him outside, where the stick that Striker picks up is quickly taken away. Back in and V beats him down, setting up some standing on the ribs. Kane gets in a shot of his own and starts bringing in the weapons, only to be crushed all over again. A big boot knocks the chair into V’s face though and the middle rope clothesline puts him down.

They head outside, where V hits a loud chop up against the barricade, followed by a tackle through a table in the corner to crush Kane. Another table is set up in the middle of the ring but Kane slugs away and tries a choke. Some kendo stick shots don’t work but a trashcan shot does stagger V. Cue Mark Henry to jump Kane from behind though and the double beatdown is on. Kane is chokeslammed/spinebustered through the table to give V the win.

Rating: C. Another power brawl here but the ending does open the doors for Kane to need to find a partner to fight the monsters. I don’t know who that is going to be because Undertaker is busy with anything else, but that could make for more than a few different ideas. Now just find a way around the fact that it’s a Big Daddy V match and it should be ok.

Posing ensues to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Here’s the latest pretty much nothing edition of ECW and I’m not particularly surprised. There are some stories, but you are only going to get so far with the roster that they have. ECW is comprised of a bunch of up and comers, people who haven’t been proven yet and wrestlers with nothing else to do. That doesn’t make for a very good show, but it is all they have at the moment.

 

 

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Smackdown – October 26, 2007: Get Over With It Already

Smackdown
Date: October 26, 2007
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Cyber Sunday and if Raw and ECW are any indication, this show might be a bit rough. You can only get so far with the focus being on setting up a stipulation or decision that you don’t find out until the pay per view, but at least with the World Title match it is only about the referee. Maybe this one will work a bit better. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with the VIP Lounge with Matt Hardy as his co-host (Matt: “What’s up homie?”) and Finlay and Rey Mysterio as his guests. MVP asks for things to stay calm but Finlay talks about beating Rey up time after time. He brings up the possible stipulations at Cyber Sunday, including stretcher match, No DQ or Shillelagh on a Pole. Rey brings up MVP having to face Matt Hardy in an MMA fight, a boxing match or just a wrestling match. MVP doesn’t want to hear it and talks about the upcoming tag match tonight. Rey and Finlay, partners tonight, get in a fight though and we wrap it up.

Batista looks at a clip of his interview with JBL last week where JBL called him a coward and got beaten up. He’s cool with anyone as referee as long as they stay out of his way. He is NOT afraid of Undertaker and there is a first time for everything, including him beating Undertaker.

Kane vs. Mark Henry

Kane has bad ribs coming in thanks to Big Daddy V on ECW. Henry drops him with a headbutt to start so Kane tries a slam. That just leaves the bad ribs open so Henry can hammer them down and the bearhug goes on. The ribs are driven into the corner but Kane is right back with the chokeslam for the fast pin.

You can vote for Mick Foley to referee Undertaker vs. Batista so here’s a look at him.

We look at the final Diva Search competition and here are both women to tell us why you SHOULDN’T vote for the other one. Apparently Eve Torres looks too much like a man and there is only room for one Brooke in WWE.

SAVE US!

MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio/Finlay

Non-title. Matt and Finlay start things off with Finlay being driven into the corner. That means a tag off to Rey so Matt works on his wrist. MVP comes in and gets taken down with a running headscissors and it’s right back to Matt vs. Finlay. It’s Matt being put on the mat this time and Rey comes back in, only to get stomped in the corner. MVP kicks Rey to the floor where Rey comes up limping, meaning Finlay has a target back inside.

Rey is fine enough to kick him down, allowing Finlay to come back in and sit on MVP’s back. MVP faceplants Rey so Matt can come back in but both teams get in a fight as we take a break. Back with MVP and Finlay squaring off but Rey won’t take Finlay’s tag. Rey comes in a few seconds later and hits the running legdrop as JBL brings up the Killer Bees for the first time in about twenty five years.

Matt comes in and gets caught with a hurricanrana, which busts him WAY open. The Side Effect plants Rey but he’s able to bring Finlay in to go after Matt’s busted head. On the other hand, Rey can’t bring himself to hit him but he can go after MVP. A double 619 drops Matt and MVP, only to have Finlay hit Rey with the Shillelagh. The Playmaker gives MVP the academic pin.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as the match was designed to set up the two singles matches at Cyber Sunday, though since they are going to be happening no matter what and the stipulations don’t tie in here. Then they tried to have a regular match on top of that, making this a bit hard to pull off. It wasn’t bad, but I was hoping they would pick something and stick with it instead of doing everything.

Video on Batista vs. Undertaker.

Armando Estrada is happy with Vickie Guerrero’s efforts on the Smackdown/ECW working relationship. Tonight, it’s an ECW triple threat and he has to get things ready. Jamie Noble comes in and begs for an easier night. He suggests Vickie is, ahem, lonely and she seems into it…before giving him Batista tonight. Noble: “YOU’RE VIOLATING MY BODY!” Then he imitates Batista’s pyro and yells a lot.

Batista vs. Jamie Noble

Non-title. Spear, spinebuster and Batista Bomb finish in about a minute.

Post match Batista goes after JBL and slams his fist on the announcers’ table but JBL no sells it.

You can vote for Steve Austin to referee Undertaker vs. Batista so here’s a look at him.

Batista has a book.

Miz vs. John Morrison vs. Big Daddy V

Matt Striker is here with V, who throws them into the corner for the big double splash (JBL: “THE RING MOVED!”). They head outside where Miz and Morrison avoid a charge to send V into the post for a change. That leaves Morrison to kick Miz in the head for two but Miz snaps him throat first across the top. V is back up with a clothesline to take Miz’s head off, setting up a Samoan drop on Morrison. The spinning Boss Man Slam plants Miz and the big elbow is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. What is there to say here? The match wasn’t good and it wasn’t long but the monster crushed the other two as he should have. V shouldn’t be breaking a sweat against almost any two and he did well here, though ECW has made Miz the favorite for the title shot by default.

Raw Rebound.

Jesse and Festus vs. Joe Hennig/Steve Fender

It is the genesis of Hennig’s WWE career. Festus runs over Fender to start as JBL tries to figure out what might have happened to Festus during his childhood. A Rocket Launcher finishes for Jesse in less than a minute.

Cyber Sunday rundown.

JBL is in the ring to explain why we should vote for him in a landslide. He brags about how rich and powerful he is and asks about why you would want a stuntman or a beer drinker as referee. We get a campaign style ad on why we should vote for him, because he has never pulled a gun on his boss like Steve Austin, or thrown himself off a rooftop like Mick Foley.

Some lackeys bring out VOTE FOR JBL shirts, which are given out to Michael Cole, Lilian Roberts and the ring announcer, whose name JBL can’t remember. As for now though, Undertaker can come out here and get his own shirt. After JBL chants his own name, here is Undertaker to cut him off. Undertaker takes his time but eventually JBL offers him a shirt. JBL hits his catchphrase and gets chokeslammed but here is Batista to spear Undertaker to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t working for me again and that comes from the same problem that has been around for the last few weeks: we’re focusing on the things that don’t change much about the match rather than the matches itself. This show was more about JBL being the referee with the Undertaker vs. Batista stuff being added in at the end. The rest of the show wasn’t exactly interesting either and they really need to move on to a traditional build soon, because this doesn’t work very well.

 

 

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Smackdown – October 12, 2007: History Doesn’t Overcome Boring

Smackdown
Date: October 12, 2007
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re done with No Mercy and Batista is still the World Champion, having vanquished Great Khali in the Punjabi Prison. That leaves a vacancy in the #1 contenders slow and there is a good chance we’ll get it covered this week, as Cyber Sunday is coming up. I’m just not sure who it is going to be. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Mercy if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Punjabi Prison match, with Batista retaining the World Title over Great Khali.

Opening sequence.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Chris Masters

Palumbo has Michelle McCool with him and this is fallout from Masters attacking Palumbo last week. Masters gets driven into the corner to start and some forearms to the back set up a big clothesline. A suplex drops Masters again as this is one sided so far. Masters avoids an elbow though and hits his own suplex for two. The reverse chinlock doesn’t last long as Palumbo is back up, only to get slammed right back down for two more. The Masterlock attempt doesn’t work and Palumbo hammers away. Masters misses a clothesline and gets rolled up for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. I know they’re trying with Palumbo but he’s not exactly stealing the show and a feud with Masters isn’t going to do much better. You’re only going to get so far with such a low level opponent as it makes Palumbo feel like someone who doesn’t matter that much. Palumbo is ok enough, but this feels like such low stakes and it isn’t working.

Post match Palumbo gets back on his motorcycle but Masters jumps him and puts on the Masterlock. Great. A rematch.

The Brothers of Destruction are back tonight.

Video on Big Daddy V.

Jesse And Festus vs. Jay Adams/Conrad Carnes

Jesse explains the idea behind Festus again before locking up with Adams to start. Cole compares it to Spider-Man and Peter Parker, which doesn’t go well with JBL. Jesse takes Adams down rather easily and it’s off to Festus to knock Carnes down. Carnes tries some forearms to the back and gets knocked down with a big boot to the face. It’s back to Jesse for a sunset flip as we cut to Deuce N Domino and Cherry watching in the back. A few shots put Jesse down but get gets over to Festus to clean house. Everything breaks down and a Rocket Launcher top rope shoulder gives Jesse the pin on Carnes.

Rating: C-. Festus is a good idea idea and he looks good when he gets the hot tag but Jesse is just kind of there. What matters here is that there is a new team, as the division has been all of two teams for far too long now. Just having someone fresh in there helps and maybe they can help pick things up a bit.

Deuce N Domino mock Jesse and Festus when Jamie Noble of all people comes in. He isn’t trying to cause any trouble but he heard Jimmy Wang Yang making some suggestive comments about Cherry. Noble whispers them to Deuce and it’s off to Vickie Guerrero’s office, with Noble being dragged off with them.

Brett Major vs. Drew McIntyre

There’s your historical moment. This is McIntyre’s debut and he has Dave Taylor with him, as Brian Major is here with Brett. We get an inset interview with McIntyre, who is applying for dual citizenship and would love to hear some USA chants. McIntyre drives him into the corner to start and grabs a front facelock. Brett reverses into one of his own and takes McIntyre down. An elbow into a legdrop gets two but Taylor hits Brian on the floor. That’s enough of a distraction for McIntyre to grab a rollup pin to complete a rather lackluster debut. McIntyre was just there and had nothing to make himself stand out here, making this pretty dull.

We get some rapid fire questions with the final four Diva Search girls. Next week: Search And Rescue as this stuff gets dumber week after week.

MVP and Matt hardy make sure that they’re both ready for the Brothers of Destruction tonight. They seem to be good.

Brothers of Destruction vs. MVP/Matt Hardy

Non-title. Matt’s waistlock on Kane doesn’t exactly work as Kane elbows him in the face to drop him fast. Undertaker comes in but Old School is broken up, allowing MVP to get in a clothesline from the apron. This goes as well as you would expect, with MVP and Hardy being sent outside as we take an early break.

Back with Kane coming in to beat on MVP but he misses a charge into the corner, allowing MVP to hammer away in the corner. There’s the running big boot and it’s Matt coming back in. Kane seems to like this better as Matt is driven into the other corner for the tag off to Undertaker. It’s back to MVP, who gets dropped by Old School for two before Kane adds the side slam.

The top rope clothesline gives Kane two, setting up Undertaker sending him into the steps (leaving MVP’s eyes bugging out at the pain). The apron legdrop gets two but Kane charges into a knee in the corner, allowing Matt to hit the middle rope elbow. Kane isn’t having this Twist of Fate stuff though and kicks Matt in the face. The second attempt works better for Matt but MVP tags himself in. That’s enough of a delay for Undertaker to come back in and wreck some more things. For some reason MVP decides to kick Undertaker in the face, earning Matt a right hand off the apron. The Tombstone gives Undertaker the pin on MVP.

Rating: C. This was little more than a squash, as Matt and MVP seemed to be more annoying to Undertaker and Kane than anything else. That being said, while they’re the Tag Team Champions, Matt and MVP don’t get along and are hardly a dominant team in the first place. I’m not wild on the champs losing, but getting beaten up by Undertaker and Kane is hardly some stunning upset.

SAVE US!

Raw Rebound.

New interviewer Anastasia Rose talks to Rey Mysterio, who gets to face Finlay in a #1 contenders match tonight. Rey got played by Finlay at No Mercy and he didn’t like that, but he’s down to play dirty too. He and Batista are friends, but he wants the title. If he has to go through Finlay, Rey is ready to fight too.

We recap Teddy Long’s heart attack, though he is now out of intensive care.

Vickie Guerrero tells Jamie Noble that Teddy should be home by next week. Jamie brags about what he did to Jimmy Wang Yang earlier. As a result, Vickie gives him a match of his own….against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Jamie Noble

Noble looks terrified to start and gets shoved down with as much effort as you would expect. There’s the big chop and Noble gets tossed away again. The Vice Grip finishes Noble in a hurry.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Deuce

Deuce is annoyed to start and kicks him in the face before choking on the ropes. Yang comes back up with some chops though and a moonsault press gives him the face pin.

Post match Deuce N Domino beat down Yang.

Another video on the Punjabi Prison match. Batista’s leap from one cage to the other is still awesome.

Rey Mysterio vs. Finlay

The winner gets Batista, on commentary, for the title at Cyber Sunday. Hold on though as JBL announces that the fans get to pick the guest referee for the Cyber Sunday title match. The choices are Mick Foley, Steve Austin (pause for the reaction), or JBL himself! Rey hammers Finlay into the corner to start but for some reason he turns around so Finlay can knock him down. Finlay loads up the Shillelagh shot but Rey knocks him down and we take an early break.

Back with Rey going to the apron and turning his back on Finlay AGAIN, earning himself a posting. Finlay grabs a Boston crab with Rey going to the ropes, earning himself something like a swinging Boss Man Slam for two. A headscissors takes Finlay down though and a middle rope DDT gives Rey two of his own. Things get a lot more serious and it turns into a brawl on the mat with the referee not being able to break it up. Said referee is tossed down and that’s a double DQ.

Rating: C+. This feud has been working pretty well so far and I’m curious to see how they move forward at Cyber Sunday. I can’t imagine they go with a triple threat for the title as wedging Batista into this feud doesn’t really feel right. We should be in for a violent showdown at the pay per view and that could be a good one.

That leaves us with no #1 contender….so here is Undertaker to knock both guys down. Undertaker signals he wants the title so the staredown with Batista ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event stuff was just about all that mattered on the card as the rest was mainly about people who don’t matter all that much. McIntyre debuting is little more than a footnote and MVP/Matt Hardy, one of the only interesting stories on the show, was there to make the Brothers of Destruction look good. Smackdown hasn’t been that great in recent weeks and Undertaker vs. Batista is going to need some help to make things that much better.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – October 5, 2007: Please Let It End

Smackdown
Date: October 5, 2007
Location: Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for No Mercy and that means it is time to push home the idea of the Punjabi Prison. Hopefully that is the big finale to the Batista vs. Great Khali feud because there is nothing left for those two to do against each other. Other than that, Vickie Guerrero is in charge and that might end badly for a lot of people. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince McMahon announcing that John Cena has torn his pectoral muscle and will be out of action for six to twelve months. That’s going to shake up some plans.

Opening sequence.

Here is Batista to get things going, but first we look at a video on the Punjabi Prison. Batista talks about how he has been in all kinds of matches but never a Punjabi Prison match. He explains the match concept, which doesn’t quite make it sound appealing. To make it worse, he’s going to be locked inside with a giant and Khali has a home field advantage.

Batista knows he’s at a disadvantage but here is Great Khali on the screen to rant. This is translated to there being no way out of the pain and torture inside the Prison with Khali. People inside with him lose their sanity and the will to live. Oh and he’ll lose the title too. Batista isn’t convinced.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Ace Steel

Michelle McCool is here with Palumbo and we hear about Palumbo heading to some big biker rally in Arizona. A rather hard clothesline drops Steel and a Samoan drop puts him down, setting up an overhead belly to belly. There’s a big boot and Full Throttle to give Palumbo the squash win.

Post match Chris Masters comes in to Masterlock Palumbo out. I’m sure this will be a thrilling feud that launches Palumbo to the next level.

Video on Rey Mysterio vs. Great Khali, which I believe was also played at the beginning of the show.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Jamie Noble

They go technical to start with Noble taking him to the mat for a front facelock. Back up and Noble switches to a wristlock but Yang uses the ropes (no break) to reverses into a wristlock on the mat. Noble fights up so Yang fires off some chops before getting two off a legsweep. A Kimura is countered with a belly to back suplex to put Yang down as commentary keeps recapping Noble’s issues with Hornswoggle.

Some choking on the ropes keeps Yang in trouble and Noble asks what his name is. Whatever his name might be, he grabs a cravate, which has JBL going into an explanation of the logic behind the hold. Yang flips out of a belly to back suplex for two off a crossbody but Noble is right back with a cobra clutch. That’s broken up too and Yang kicks him in the face, setting up a middle rope dropkick. Yang’s moonsault press misses though and Noble hits the fireman’s carry gutbuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of what happens when you spend months (if not years) treating wrestlers like nothing and then suddenly expect them to matter. The cruiserweights have been treated as absolutely nothing for a long time now but we’re supposed to care about them because they might be in line for a chance at a meaningless title. The match was fine, but it was an ice cold match and there was no hiding it.

The Diva Search girls had an obstacle course on the beach. In case you wanted to know their slip n slide or hula hooping skills. J. Kim is eliminated.

Tag Team Titles: MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce N Domino, with Cherry, are challenging because these teams are the tag division. Hold on though as MVP wants to have a pushup contest before the match. As expected, after a lot of trash talk, MVP cheats to cost Matt the contest by grabbing Matt’s arm. As for the match, Matt suplexes Domino to start and hands it off to MVP for an armbar. It’s back to Matt, who is driven into the wrong corner so Deuce can come in and forearm Matt’s back.

That earns him the middle rope elbow to the back and Deuce N Domino are both sent outside. MVP and Matt exchange elbows to the two of them and we take a break. Back with Matt fighting out of a front facelock and getting over to MVP. The comeback doesn’t last long as Domino low bridges MVP to the floor to put him in trouble for a change. A slam into a knee drop lets Deuce talk trash, which has JBL on a rant about not staying focused.

Domino puts on a reverse chinlock with a knee in MVP’s back before taking him outside for a back first ram into the apron. All the back work sets up an arm crank back inside before going to a more logical Boston crab. With that broken up, MVP finally kicks Domino away and the hot tag brings in Matt. Cole: “Matt Hardy is a literal ball of fire!” No Cole, he isn’t. The Side Effect hits the illegal Deuce and MVP hits Domino low, setting up the Twist of Fate to retain the titles.

Rating: C. The match got a lot of time but there are only so many ways to get excited over seeing these teams fight. We have covered this multiple times now and it is losing the limited steam that it had in the first place. Matt vs. MVP is still interesting, but they really need some other teams to face to keep their title matches fresh.

MVP and Matt go to leave but Kane pops up for his match, plus a staredown at MVP for last week’s low blow.

Kane vs. Kenny Dykstra

Joined in progress with Kane driving him into the corner for some right hands. An elbow to the heck keeps Dykstra in trouble and a big boot cuts off the comeback attempt. Dykstra gets in some kicks to the ribs but his suplex is blocked without much trouble. Kane hits a dropkick for two but Dykstra goes for the legs. That has a grand total of no effect as Kane is right back with the side slam. There’s the top rope clothesline to set up the chokeslam to end Dykstra.

Rating: D+. Almost a total squash here and it wasn’t exactly an entertaining one. Kane’s stuff still looks good but it is a little hard to get behind anything he does. He has been stuck in the same midcard/upper midcard loop for so long that there is little reason to get invested in him. A squash of Dykstra didn’t exactly change that.

We look back at Undertaker destroying Mark Henry in short order last week.

We look back at Teddy Long and Kristal’s messed up wedding.

The yet to be named Krissy Vaine is in Vickie Guerrero’s office, where Vickie explains that Teddy Long is out of his coma but in no condition to return. Matt Hardy and MVP come in, with MVP thinking Matt needs to face Undertaker. Instead, Vickie makes the two of them vs. the Brothers of Destruction. Of note: Vickie said “excuse me” when MVP was talking a lot.

We look at John Cena’s injury, which is going to put him on the shelf for six months (twelve is no longer mentioned).

Tale of the tape for Rey Mysterio vs. Great Khali.

SAVE US, now featuring the word “bookshelves”.

Jesse and Festus vs. Mike Tolar/Chad Collyer

Before the bell, Jesse explains that Festus turns into a different person when the bell rings. The bell does ring and Festus gets serious, including a clothesline to Tolar. A double clothesline takes both of them down and it’s off to Jesse for a running bulldog. Collyer manages to take Jesse down but misses an elbow, allowing the hot tag off to Festus. House is cleaned and an over the shoulder sitdown gutbuster finishes Collyer, sending Festus back to his normal state.

Rating: C. I’ve heard of worse gimmicks than a split personality brought on by the bell ringing, though it might not have the longest shelf life. Jesse is fine enough as the talker who wrestles the basic part of the match and it isn’t like there is a wealth of tag teams running around at the moment. The Festus stuff is kind of interesting, but we’ll have to see how long it can last.

No Mercy rundown.

Video on Great Khali vs. Rey Mysterio from last year.

Rey Mysterio vs. Great Khali

Rey is wise to stand back at the bell before getting in some rather worthless strikes. Khali hits a single clothesline to take over and a hard whip sends Rey into the corner. We hit the dreaded nerve hold but Rey is in the ropes. He comes up striking away, only to get kicked in the face for a trip to the floor. Khali’s big chop only hits steps though and Rey manages a 619 around the post (JBL: “You gotta be kidding me.”). Cue Finlay to jump Rey for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Rey’s comeback was starting to get somewhere but they needed to cut it off when they did as it couldn’t go much further. You don’t want Khali selling for someone of Rey’s size for very long but it leaves people wondering just how far Rey could have gone here. The problem continues to be watching Khali do anything, as he is so slow and lumbering that even the basics are pretty uninteresting.

Post match the beatdown is on until Batista makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show really needs something fresh as almost nothing on here is remotely interesting. That isn’t going to last long and it isn’t really working here. What we got wasn’t the worst, but it was so uninteresting that I had a hard time getting through the show. Maybe that changes after No Mercy, but it needs to change pretty soon.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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