Thunder
Date: January 3, 2001
Location: Mid-South Coliseum, Memphis, Tennessee
Attendance: 2,547
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray

Happy New Year everyone and welcome to some of the final months of WCW. It’s been a little while since we’ve had anything to actually watch as a few shows were preempted by holidays. Even WCW wasn’t stupid enough to try and have a show on Christmas night so this is a fresh start for them. Let’s get to it.

We open with a rapid fire video of everything that has been happening recently. It would be nice if they had more than five seconds per story but we need to get in and out of this in thirty seconds.

Mike Awesome has a Team Canada bus.

Opening sequence.

Tony calls this 2001: the Wrestling Odyssey. Well it certainly is a difficult journey.

Here’s President Ric Flair to get things going. He has a few things to get through before we start the show. First of all, Goldberg’s Streak is on the line in his tag match at Sin, as per Goldberg’s request. Second, Scott Steiner will be defending his World Title in a three way dance against Jeff Jarrett and a mystery partner (Yes partner. Even Flair said it twice.). For now though, he’s under a two week suspension because that’s how you build up a World Champion for a pay per view title defense. That suspension ends on Monday, because having a two week suspension WHEN YOU DIDN’T HAVE ANY SHOWS makes perfect sense.

Cue Jeff Jarrett to interrupt because he’s tired of hearing about Steiner and the Mystery Man because he’s the other one in the match. Ric really doesn’t like being threatened so he gives Jarrett a match with Sid with the three way dance spot on the line. His opponent is Sid, whose music starts playing before Ric can even introduce him. It’s a taped show and they still can’t pull this off. We see a clip of Sid having Steiner pinned at Starrcade, which is enough to warrant another title shot. Shouldn’t that be a guaranteed title shot and not a match with Jarrett? Sid says it bees that way so the beating is on tonight.

Post break, Ric asks Mike Sanders why the Insiders aren’t on the show. Sanders says they were given a night off. Ric isn’t convinced but Sanders insists he’s not up to anything.

The Thrillers are in their office when Sanders comes in to say that yeah, he’s the reason the Insiders aren’t here tonight. Reno is given a match with Johnny the Bull later tonight.

Crowbar has a chair match with Meng tonight before he gets to face his idol again. Terry Funk was the man Crowbar looked up to before he bound Crowbar’s hands together and hit him in the head with a chair over and over. Crowbar swears revenge and to receive the hardcore torch at Sin. This was a really impassioned promo, which is why Crowbar isn’t going anywhere.

Buy a Cat T-Shirt!

Shane Helms vs. Jamie Noble

This should be good. They run the ropes to start until Shane shoulders him down, followed by Shane pulling on a double underhook and bending Jamie around like an abdominal stretch. A middle rope fist drop (remember that we’re in Memphis) gets two on Noble. Shane takes too much time posing though and the Nightmare on Helm Street (that dragon sleeper into a standing elbow drop) is countered into a northern lights suplex for two. The Vertebreaker plants Jamie but again Shane won’t cover. Now the Nightmare on Helm Street is enough for the pin in a bit of excess violence.

Rating: C+. Nice little match here with Shane looking good before he heads into his title shot. The Cruiserweights has been one of the few bright spots in these last months as there’s a story here and a talented champion defending against a bunch of guys who want the belt and personal revenge at the same time.

Post match Evan Karagias comes out to go after Shane but Shannon Moore runs in for the save. Jamie tombstones Shannon but takes another Nightmare. Now it’s Chavo running out to hit Shannon with the belt, making him the last man standing.

We see Konnan beating Elix Skipper for reasons I still don’t understand other than stupid politics.

Konnan and Elix get in an argument in the back but it’s a Canadian trap with Konnan getting beaten down.

Cat wants to be the Commissioner again and suggests that Gene Okerlund watch Lassie. Gene thinks he could do things to Miss Jones.

The Harris Twins have been laid out.

Corporal Cajun/Sgt. AWALL vs. Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo

O’Haire and Palumbo are surprise opponents as this was supposed to be a six man. Sanders publicly says that he’s the reason the Insiders aren’t here tonight. The rest of the Thrillers lay out the Misfits to give the team an early advantage with Cajun taking the early beating. It’s a shame the Thrillers can’t beat these stupid names out of them. Stevie makes a Hogan’s Heroes reference which actually breaks Tony up a little bit.

AWALL comes in and punches Palumbo a few times, allowing Cajun to powerslam him for two. Cajun gets two more off a back elbow, only to have Chuck do the Chris Jericho springboard dropkick to knock him off the apron. Of course the Thrillers get in some cheap shots on the outside and AWALL is knocked to the floor. The Seanton Bomb puts Cajun away.

Rating: D. Quite the messy match here but it establishes O’Haire and Palumbo as a good team for the future. Odds are they’ll be the pair that faces the Insiders for the belts at Sin, which is the best possible option due to the level of talent there. The Misfits on the other hand just need to go away. They’re not interesting, the joke is long past over and there’s just nothing left for them to do.

The Thrillers lay out the Misfits post match until Chavo tries to make a save. Shane Douglas comes in through the crowd and beats on Rection.

Post break Shane says he’s going to keep tormenting Rection until he gets the US Title as revenge for him taking away Torrie Wilson. Sin is going to be a chain on a pole match, which makes me think Russo is back. Rection runs in and beats Shane down.

On the bus, Jim Duggan sneaks up on Skipper and attacks because HE NEVER WALKS AWAY FROM A FIGHT. No, apparently he starts them by sneaking up on someone and telling the camera to stay quiet.

The Filthy Animals need to regroup after Konnan got attacked.

Johnny the Bull and Big Vito are talking about their priest when Cat comes up to say he wants to take out Reno tonight so he can put him in soup.

Buff Bagwell doesn’t understand why Sarge has issues with him. Someone who can turn a goof like Goldberg into a wrestler must be talented. Lex Luger has an “autographed copy” of Goldberg’s book and apparently Goldberg can’t spell.

Video on Sarge running the Power Plant.

Lance Storm gives Mike Awesome a match with Duggan tonight, which apparently he can just do.

Rey Mysterio has a plan.

Flair comes in to see the Thrillers and gives Reno a match with the Cat. So Reno has a night off? Jindrak will have a match too but his opponent isn’t named.

Sid, in different clothes than earlier, is ready for Jeff and is very thankful for his spot.

That’s about nine straight minutes of backstage segments. Maybe next up they can have someone hold up a sign that says “YEP! WE’RE STALLING!”

Crowbar vs. Meng

Chair on a pole match, making me even more convinced that Russo is back. Of note: there isn’t an actual pole as the chair is just in the corner. They slug it out to start as Daffney breaks some glass with the screeches. It’s already time for the chair with Meng getting his hands on it, only to have Crowbar dive over the top to take him out. Meng is whipped into the barricade but comes right back with his normal Tongan insanity. A drop toehold sends Meng head first into the steps and for some reason it actually works.

Daffney and Paisley get in a fight over the chair (you remember the chair) as Crowbar slows Meng down with a reverse DDT. That’s not enough for a cover though as Crowbar charges at Meng, only to be flapjacked into the chair on the top turnbuckle. The Death Grip puts Crowbar out.

Rating: D+. For some reason the announcers were stunned by the win, even though this feels like your standard way to build Meng back up before having him get taken down again. I’m assuming we’ll be having another three way for the Hardcore Title at Sin, which makes me think this should have been a standard hardcore match but why do that when you can have a (non-existent) pole.

Flair shakes Bagwell and Luger’s hands but nothing is heard.

Mark Jindrak vs. Goldberg

Jindrak actually gets in some offense but gets beaten in just over a minute with the usual.

Goldberg is ready for Luger and Bagwell.

Jeff Jarrett calls out the Mystery Man tonight because the Mystery Man can choose who he’s facing at Sin.

Luger and Bagwell talk to Kronik.

The Cat vs. Reno

Before the match, Cat says he wants Sanders out here because he has no issue with Igor (his name for Reno, which he’s used at least five times tonight). Reno jumps him from behind and chokes a lot to start, only to get knocked out to the floor. Miss Jones fires off some kicks, which certainly isn’t an excuse to showcase how she looks in chaps. Back in and Reno stomps away but his t-bone suplex is countered into a small package for two. Stevie: “Is that a brainbuster?” Cat pops up, does the crotch chop, and the Feliner ends Reno quick. I have no idea what this is supposed to accomplish but Cat is winning a lot lately.

Jim Duggan vs. Mike Awesome

There’s a big blurred out area behind the Canadians during their pre-match speech due to fans flipping them off. Duggan is back in the blue trunks here. They slug it out to start with Awesome being knocked to the floor for a change. Back in and Awesome slowly beats him down as the match loses the little interest it had coming in. Duggan comes back with a running clothesline as Stevie name drops Bronco Lubich. Skipper does….something from the floor though, allowing Mike to hit a quick Awesome Splash for the pin in a hurry.

Post match the beatdown is on until the Filthy Animals come in for the save. Konnan grabs the mic and tells them to look at the screen, where we see the Team Canada bus covered in graffiti.

After a break, Team Canada says they want to deal with the Animals at Sin instead of calling the cops.

The Mystery Man’s gear is shown in the back.

Buff Bagwell vs. DeWayne Bruce

Buff turns his back to pose to start (and it’s hard to blame him), allowing Bruce to get in a shot from behind. They take it to the floor with Bruce in control and walking around the ring with Buff being dragged behind. Back in and Buff gets two off a neckbreaker before we hit the choking. Bruce fights up and makes his comeback so here’s Luger with a chair. We cut to Goldberg running out of his locker room but Kronik jumps him, throws him in a box and carries him away on a forklift. Back in the arena, Luger Pillmanizes Bruce’s arm for the DQ.

Rating: F. Leave it to two moronic heels to attack a career jobber and injure him instead of going after GOLDBERG. This is such a stupid story as we’ve already had Goldberg go over Luger twice and now they’re going to use Bruce to stretch it out to a third pay per view. Why this is happening while Sid, Jarrett, and whoever is under that mask get a title shot isn’t clear, but I’d chalk it up to “WCW is stupid.”

Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid Vicious

The winner is in the three way dance at Sin. Before the match, Jarrett wants to talk (of course) to the Mystery Man. Jeff rambles on for a long time about how he and Sid both want momentum coming towards Sin but the audio keeps cutting out, likely trying to censor some chants. Sid won’t let him bail though and the brawl is on in front of a dead crowd with Jeff being dropped throat first across the barricade.

Back in and Jeff stomps away before a dropkick gets two. We hit the sleeper (of course) until Sid fights back and gets in a chokeslam. The powerbomb is loaded up but the Mystery Man comes in and hits Sid in the back, but since this is WCW we’ll call that a no contest, meaning neither has advanced to Sin.

Rating: D. Naturally two former World Champions can only get four minutes before a run-in finish that didn’t even go the way it was supposed to. As usual, Sid didn’t quite look great in the ring and Jeff was doing nothing other than his signature stuff. I’m sure you know where this is going for Sin and I really wish they could have just gone with that in the first place.

Sid gets double teamed and of course it’s Scott Steiner under the mask to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. There’s just so much stupid on this show with the main event scene being the biggest issue. I can’t get over the fact that it’s freaking Buddy Lee Parker getting the spotlight in a story. Yeah he trained Goldberg, but you can’t just make up a story to get someone in there with a slightly better win/loss record? As in with any wins on his record? The rest of the show was the usual mess, not made any better by the fact that Sin is next week. Bad show here and a really horrible way to start the new year.

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Thunder
Date: December 20, 2000
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 2,872
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Stevie Ray

This is the final show for the year for WCW as the next two Nitros are canceled due to Christmas and New Year’s Day while next week’s Thunder is a Best Of show. Believe it or not, WCW is actually on a roll at this point, or at least as much of a roll as you can be on with one good show. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on the World Title situation which might be more interesting if Lance Storm was involved but instead we’re getting Steiner, Jarrett and another mystery man. Steiner’s last surprise challenger was Sid so this could be anyone from Rollerball Rocco to Flyboy Rocco.

Ric Flair is in the back of his limo and talks about how great the pay per view is going to be. The Mystery Man is hyped up again and we hear about tonight’s tag team battle royal.

Opening sequence.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Jamie Noble

Noble is challenging. Before the match, Chavo talks about being ready to face Shane Helms at Sin. However, if he somehow loses here, it would be a rematch at Sin and Shane would be left out in the cold. What an odd threat. Noble starts fast with a dropkick and slam before putting on a quickly broken up STF. Chavo is sent out to the floor and grabs his title but goes back inside so Noble can roll him up for two.

What appears to be a low blow puts Jamie down and Chavo’s dropkick gets two more. Jamie gets in a quick neckbreaker and fires off some right hands to send Chavo backing into the corner. Noble loads up a superplex but here’s Shane to hold Noble’s leg, allowing Chavo to send him down. A frog splash and the brainbuster retain Chavo’s title.

Rating: C. This wasn’t the most exciting match in the world but I’m really digging the storytelling here. It’s a basic, logical story that makes you wonder how Chavo is going to get out of this at Sin. That’s the kind of thing that would have done WCW a world of good in their main events over the last year or so. A lot of the time a basic story will give you more positives than almost any overly complicated story like a big swerve and a heel stable headed by a corrupt boss.

Crowbar is ready for Terry Funk at Sin.

Cat rides up to Flair on an ATV (Which you can WIN!) and asks for a match with Scott Steiner tonight. Flair, realizing that Cat has no chance of actually beating Steiner, is fine with this.

Bam Bam Bigelow is ready for Crowbar tonight.

Here’s Jim Duggan in street clothes with something to say. Duggan doesn’t want to take up too much of our time so we can get back to the show. He’s made a decision and it’s caused him some issues. About three months ago, it was decided that he needed to retire because it was past his time.

For twenty years, Duggan has shared his life with us because this is who he is. Then he made the mistake of turned his back on his country and gave up on everything. Now he needs to apologize for everything, including to his father, his wife and his children. Above all else though, he wants to apologize to the fans. After those twenty years, they deserve an apology because he can only hope they understand. I like the idea here and it’s another story that is always going to work but couldn’t this be used on someone with a bit more upside than Jim Duggan?

After a break, Duggan is leaving but Mike Awesome offers him a ride after the show is over.

The Natural Born Thrillers are ready for the battle royal and Gene Okerlund’s insults don’t seem to sway them. Stasiak insults Okerlund and that’s about it.

Hugh Morrus thanks Duggan and accepts his apology. There will be no taking Hugh’s beer though.

Tag Team Battle Royal

3 Count, Jung Dragons, Meng/Kwee Wee, Filthy Animals, Noble and Karagias, Harris Twins, Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak, Perfect Event

The winners get a title shot at the pay per view. The fight starts during the entrances and it only takes one member being eliminated for a team to be out. Yang is eliminated early to get rid of the Dragons and thankfully clear the ring out a bit, which would go much faster if there wasn’t a referee included.

Noble and Karagias go out next as those pesky cruiserweights are being cleared out. Everyone slowly beats on everyone until 3 Count is eliminated. This nonsense is getting ridiculous. Cue Vito to beat on Reno (standing at ringside with the Thrillers) and Johnny the Bull of all people to make a return and blast Sanders with a kendo stick.

We get a Mamalukes reunion as Meng is eliminated by the Twins, only to have them get eliminated as a result. We’re back from a break with Kidman/Mysterio, Jindrak/O’Haire and Perfect Event. The Thrillers clean house because it’s four against two meager cruiserweights. A dropkick eliminates Kidman so we’re down to the Thrillers….who split the win, basically repeating the same idea that 3 Count had in the ladder match at Starrcade.

Rating: D-. Make sure to treat those cruiserweights like they’re the most worthless things in the world. I mean you have SHAWN STASIAK out there to get a title shot and stand tall. The idea is fine but it’s really not going to hurt you to let some of the other teams look like something important on the way to having these two teams stand tall.

Sanders runs his mouth a lot post match. Apparently any two of these Thrillers will be challenging the Insiders but we won’t know until Sin. Riveting indeed.

Scott Steiner shouts that Flair doesn’t control him and he wants that Mystery Man tonight.

Konnan vs. Elix Skipper

Konnan does his catchphrases, which I really should understand by this point. They start screwing stuff up early as Konnan botches something off the ropes, prompting the camera to cut away to the crowd in a never good sign. Back with Konnan getting stomped down and put in a chinlock for a bit. The rolling clothesline and a reverse DDT put Elix down, only to have him get to the apron for a springboard missile dropkick. We hit the chinlock again because Konnan needs to rest three minutes in. A springboard legdrop gets two for Skipper but Konnan hits another rolling lariat and grabs the Tequila Sunrise for the tap out.

Rating: D-. And that’s ALL on Konnan, who looked like a disaster out there, barely being able to do anything without being worn out in a short TV match. Skipper was doing his usual stuff but Konnan is a big deal in another country so it’s time for Elix to lose cleanly. Thanks for the cool spots but drawing power from years ago is all that matters.

Jeff Jarrett is ready for Scott Steiner at Sin. I can’t believe we have to sit through more Jarrett main events. Was anyone asking for that?

The Misfits yell at Hugh Morrus over him accepting Duggan’s apology while turning his back on Chavo. Morrus says the difference is Chavo not realizing what he’s doing is wrong. Point to Morrus on that one.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Crowbar

Bigelow is still limping. Crowbar is quickly thrown into the corner for an Avalanche because what else is someone Bigelow’s size going to do at this point in his career. A huge toss sends Crowbar flying but Bigelow makes the mistake of screaming at Daffney who easily destroys him with some more vocal eruptions. Crowbar gets smart and goes after the knee before they take it outside. Bigelow sends him into the barricade but gets his eyes raked by the banshee, allowing Crowbar to chop block him down. Cue Meng to lay out Crowbar, allowing Bigelow to mostly botch Greetings From Asbury Park for the quick pin.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what’s worse: Bigelow going over Crowbar or the fact that these two just had a better match without weapons than they’ve had with them in what feels like years. These guys are capable of wrestling a coherent match with a simple story in Bigelow’s knee injury but for some reason they’re stuck with the weak weapons stuff most of the time.

Norman Smiley is still too excited about Glacier returning but is told he has a match. It’s a makeup match from a few weeks ago.

Norman Smiley vs. Goldberg

Norman is in street clothes. Goldberg actually gives him a few seconds before the spear and Jackhammer make it 33-0.

Shane Douglas pays Kronik off.

The sitdown interview this week is with Ric Flair, who won’t say who the Mystery Man is despite Tenay asking him over and over. Why Ric just doesn’t say “it’s a MYSTERY” isn’t clear. Flair praises Steiner’s abilities but says the title has a big target that comes with it. The title is all that matters though, unlike this interview which was the same stuff that Flair has been saying for weeks now.

Ernest Miller is ready for his title shot.

Shane Douglas/Kronik vs. Filthy Animals

Shane does the same promo he always does before the match, which to be fair still works well enough. Douglas is about to start with Morrus but brings in Adams before there’s any contact. I’m not a Shane fan but he knows how to use the most basic heel stuff to good results. Morrus clotheslines Adams and brings in Lash for an ax handle.

The dancing punches don’t seem to work so Lash settles for kicking Adams low. It’s not exactly a crushing blow however as Adams takes over with an easy slam and brings in Clark for the first time. Lash’s offense has about as much effect as you would expect so it’s off to Wall for a showdown that could set wrestling back a hundred years.

Clark uses a drop toehold of all things so he can tag in Shane for the reverse Hennig necksnap. Raise your hand if that’s the sequence you were expecting. Wall gets in a spinebuster on Shane as everything breaks down. Clark gives Lash a Meltdown for no cover, followed by Morrus slamming Shane and hitting the moonsault for two. Adams cleans house with a chair though and the Franchiser puts Morrus away to give us a reason for a rematch at Sin.

Rating: D+. This actually didn’t suck as they went with a simple formula until right up to the ending. Kronik as partners for hire isn’t the worst idea in the world and it’s a lot better than having them be paid off for half of a fifteen minute match and not being able to read a stopwatch. Douglas isn’t great either but he’s as good as any other midcard heel so him getting Morrus again worse as well as anything else would.

Post break, Morrus yells at the Misfits.

Here’s Team Canada with something to say. After the now traditional complaining about the Presidential elections, Storm rips on Duggan for turning his back on Canada. Of course cue Duggan again and amazingly the fans go INSANE with patriotism. By that I mean they do nothing and WCW pipes in USA chants. Duggan goes in for the fight and hangs on, only to have Mike Awesome come in and take him out to become the newest member of the team.

Post break, Awesome declares himself the Canadian Career Killer. I would have gone with the guy fighting to become World Champion because he’s the kind of guy that might get some attention because he’s an athletic freak but this is a major step up from That 70s Guy.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. The Cat

Cat is challenging of course. Steiner pounds him in the back and stomps Cat in the corner because this is Scott Steiner vs. the Cat. The Push-Up elbow gets two and a backbreaker allows Scott to yell at Ms. Jones. Cat comes back with a few kicks, including one to put Steiner on the floor. We get the catfight as Cat stays on Steiner, including a shot to the throat back inside. Never mind though as we get the spinning belly to belly, only to have the Mystery Man come out and distract Steiner, setting up the Feliner for two. A t-bone suplex sets up the Recliner and we’re done.

Rating: D. Yeah this was exactly what you would expect with the Cat basically getting destroyed and only a few kicks keeping this from being a squash. At the very least, and I do mean VERY least, Cat is able to work a match without looking like he’s about to have a mild heart attack during the match. That’s something isn’t it?

Steiner chases after the Mystery Man to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. They’ve had worse shows but it’s definitely a big letdown after Monday. This was all about the questionable decisions like having Konnan go over Skipper clean and WCW thinking Bam Bam Bigelow is anything but nostalgia in the year 2000. It’s a pretty standard WCW show for the time: a decent opener and then a bunch of uninspiring stories centered around people who aren’t all that interesting in the first place.

That’s it for WCW 2000 as the only thing left is a Best of Thunder show and I don’t think anyone is going to be wanting to read that. This year is definitely divided into different sections. The earliest part of the year, as in from the start up through Russo/Bischoff resetting things, is flat out boring. The stories weren’t any good and the shows were just big wastes of time as Sid held the title for months at a time.

Then it was the New Blood Era where we were supposed to buy that the younger guys were important, even though it was Jeff Jarrett and his thirteen year career running things for the new generation. The rest of the main event was all the old guys being treated as the heroes while the actual new blood was lucky to get a midcard title shot here and there. On top of that you had Russo and Bischoff turning the show into a circus as the fans turned away in droves.

Oh and always remember: Vince Russo is MANLY and can hold on in the Figure Four for over a minute because even though there was a problem in there, they couldn’t possibly change the story to protect the move and make Russo look like any normal person in one of the most famous finishing holds of all time.

Then Russo left and Booker T. won the World Title a few times and things got a little bit better, only to have him drop it to Scott Steiner (which was fine) to make sure the most technically sound main eventer they had went away. Booker winning was a genuinely cool moment as he remains one of the only people in WCW to have a traditional rise up the card before winning the title. After that, the show fell back into the same problems it had earlier in the year: boring stories, lame wrestling, the entertaining people being shoved to the side so the “draws” could get all the glory.

WCW was almost entirely dead coming into 2000 and their Hail Mary of Russo and Bischoff working together failed more spectacularly than anyone could have ever imagined. The company was more than living on borrowed time and they didn’t do themselves any favors by going with the things people didn’t want to see while getting rid of the stuff that wasn’t like the WWF. Yeah Raw was on fire at this point, but WCW was standing in the way of the flames to burn themselves alive. This year was nothing short of a disaster all around and a fitting way to set up the final months of the company.

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Monday Nitro #267
Date: November 20, 2000
Location: Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center, Augusta, Georgia
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson

It’s the last Nitro before Mayhem and most of the show would seem to be set up already. Scott Steiner continues to be one of the strongest heels the company has pushed in years but at the same time he’s not exactly lighting the world on fire with the chinlock finisher and all the insanity in his promos. Maybe the TV being back in America will be better so let’s get to it.

We open with a video on some of the big stories at the moment, including Luger vs. Goldberg, Nash vs. the Thrillers, Major Gunns leaving the Misfits for Canada, because that’s still a thing, and of course Steiner being all crazy.

Also in Europe, at a show called Millennium Final, the Boogie Knights won the Tag Team Titles in a major upset. Wright won the match on his own after Disco was injured early on.

Earlier today, Luger tried to get a World Title match tonight. Sanders wasn’t sure but seemed to agree, only to have the Thrillers bail when they found Sean O’Haire laid out in the hallway.

Sanders says there will still be a Tag Team Title match tonight no matter what. Luger’s title shot is confirmed.

Opening sequence.

Jamie Noble vs. Yang

Yang hits the ring and starts fast as Madden realizes that Jamie is “a white guy.” Jamie sends him to the floor for a flip dive (Madden: “He’s pretty fly for a white guy.”) but Yang powerbombs the heck out of him back inside. Jamie bails back to the floor where Leia Meow snaps off a hurricanrana to pop Madden harder than it should. Back in again and they chop it out, followed by Jamie getting two off a middle rope legdrop. Yang catches him coming out of the corner for an over the back piledriver but here’s Evan Karagias and 3 Count for a distraction. Jamie dives on Moore and Helms before rolling Yang up for the pin.

Rating: C. Standard yet fun fast paced cruiserweight match here and that’s always a good way to open the show. The three team idea is fine and could set up some interesting stuff down the line, though I have no hope of any of these guys getting anywhere as a result. They’re far too low on the WCW totem pole and there’s almost no way to rise up that thing before turning 40.

Evan and Noble clear the ring post match.

Luger talks to Flair about doing the right thing and Ric promises to make sure it happens.

We look at Scott Steiner beating Sting down on Thunder to put him on the shelf AGAIN.

Alex Wright is on the phone with the injured Disco and doesn’t know who his partner is tonight. He finds Kronik but they won’t take a check. The Filthy Animals chase Wright away.

We see Rick Steiner vs. T-Money (Terry Crews) on Battledome in a boxing match which turned into a big brawl because of course it did.

Here’s Ric Flair with something to say. Ric talks about how awesome WCW is for going from Europe to Georgia and tells Tony that he was great in England all night long. Madden: “DID YOU SLEEP WITH RIC FLAIR???” My goodness there’s an image I never need to think about again. He can’t change Luger vs. Booker T. for tonight because it came from the Commissioner (Can we please pick a set of rules for these two?) but he’ll spice things up tonight.

If Luger wins the title tonight, Goldberg has a title shot on Sunday. Flair doesn’t care about the Streak that Russo invented because Goldberg can get a shot on Sunday. Cue Jeff Jarrett to threaten Ric with a guitar shot. Jeff actually has a reason to be out here: he has information about the father of Stacy Keibler’s baby. Ric looks a bit shaken up Jeff says that he (as in Jeff) knocked Stacy up, or gave her the guitar shot of love that is.

David comes out and wants to know when and where this happened. Apparently it was on the night of the Great American Bash at the Baltimore Marriott after Jarrett won another World Title. Stacy came to the door wearing very little and carrying a shopping bag. The Keibler elf wanted to know if Jeff wanted some of her cookies and didn’t care what happened with David.

Things happened and the next morning all that was left was the shopping bag. That bag was full of garbage, just like the rest of this story. Jeff guitars David as the announcers try to figure out why Jarrett came up with this story, which is a fair question. Cue Buff Bagwell to go after Jeff, only to be whipped into the set like the goon that he is. Buff gets back up and knocks Jeff off the stage for his big hero moment.

Kevin Nash tells Fit Finlay (now an agent) that he’s not here alone.

Team Canada is in the back and apparently Elix Skipper is going to be Wright’s partner.

Tag Team Titles: Perfect Event vs. Elix Skipper/Alex Wright

Wright and Skipper are defending. Stasiak and Wright get things going with Alex stomping away before Palumbo comes in with a big right hand. A double slingshot suplex puts Wright down and Stasiak gets two off a neckbreaker with Skipper making a save. Everything breaks down and here are the Filthy Animals to lay out Wright, giving Stasiak the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. Another nothing match in a move pretty clearly taking place to transition the titles from O’Haire and Jindrak to Perfect Event because that was the big solution they needed or something. They would have been better off having Kidman or one of the Animals in there as the partner but instead they went with Skipper for reasons of randomness, even though he wound up being a normal partner for Wright.

Video of Mancow attacking Jimmy Hart to set up their match at Mayhem.

Kwee Wee thinks Lance Storm is scared to fight him so he’s dropping out of the tag match so General Rection can fight instead. How does that make sense? Kwee Wee’s partner Meng promises (yes he’s talking) to rip those crossed eyes out of his head. So much for any kind of logic.

Mike Sanders has an idea for Kwee Wee tonight.

Vito hits Reno in the head with a bat with compliments of Maria (Vito’s sister). Ignore the bat clearly bending as it made contact.

The Battledome guys are here yelling about something.

Wright thinks WCW is scared of the Boogie Knights being champions so now they want the Animals in a handicap match at Mayhem.

The Battledome guys are still here so Rick Steiner comes out with the Battledome belt. Naturally this means it’s time to talk about Luger vs. Booker T. tonight. Steiner challenges them to a fight and T-Money gets in, only to have the other three get in and help with the beatdown. Security comes out for the save and this takes WAY too long to break up.

The Thrillers are ordering pizza when Reno comes in and says he wants to fight Vito tonight.

Rection gives the Misfits a pep talk.

Here’s Kevin Nash to introduce his help against the Thrillers. Nash has come to the realization that he has thirteen months and ten days left on his contract and he’s not sure how he wants to spend the rest of that time. He drove here from Atlanta today with a good friend of his and now he has to watch the Thrillers be handed the Tag Team Titles.

Cue Sanders to make the match because he’s convinced that Nash doesn’t have any friends around here. Nash says he’s here to make money instead of making friends, which somehow turns into a discussion about cheese whiz 101. For some reason Nash insults Sanders’ ability to hold himself in a bar and that’s enough to bring Mike to the ring. Cue Diamond Dallas Page to the ring for the save, which would have worked a lot better had he not come out a few weeks ago for a Battledome segment. Jindrak eats a Diamond Cutter and Page says he’ll see them on Sunday.

Luger isn’t worried about fighting Booker T. tonight because it’s a main event style match.

We recap Meng/Kwee Wee vs. Team Canada in a bizarre yet interesting feud.

Jim Duggan/Lance Storm vs. Kwee Wee/Meng

Before the match, Storm rips on America for not being able to figure out its Presidential race two weeks in. Meng kicks Storm in the ribs to start but a Duggan 2×4 shot to the back puts him down. Duggan comes in for some shoulders to the ribs as the fans chant USA. So I guess they’re for Duggan as he’s the closest thing to an American that they have in the ring right now. A Tongan Death Grip is quickly broken up but the hot tag brings in Rection. Skipper blasts him with the flagpole, which draws out the Misfits to give him a beating. In the melee, Rection rolls Duggan up for the pin. Tony makes WAY too big of a deal out of this.

Rating: D. Well that happened. I’m really not sure why Rection pinning Duggan is supposed to be a big deal but Tony certainly seemed to be excited over what we just saw. The match was too short to mean anything, much like everything else that’s happened tonight, but at least we had that Jeff Jarrett/Stacy story.

Jeff Jarrett and Shane Douglas are talking about something.

Kwee Wee vs. ???

Sanders is on commentary and very pleased when the opponent is revealed as Goldberg. The match lasts 29 seconds in case you were expecting something else.

Post match here’s Ric Flair to say Sanders deserves equal treatment. Goldberg isn’t all that tired though so here’s a bonus.

Goldberg vs. Mike Sanders

36 seconds and it’s 21-0, even though Flair said the Streak didn’t matter anymore.

Booker isn’t worried about Goldberg interfering tonight because he can beat Luger on his own.

We flash back to Halloween Havoc at Shane Douglas attacking The Cat and then beating up Ms. Jones the next night on Nitro.

Shane Douglas vs. Buff Bagwell

Before the match, Torrie insults the Georgia women because she’s from Los Angeles. Oh and Shane wants Cat at Mayhem. Buff gets sent into the corner to start before coming back with a neckbreaker and that stupid strut of his. Shane knocks him towards the ropes though and Torrie adds in some choking from the floor. The announcers try to push Bagwell as a matinee idol because so many of their fans know what that means.

We hit the chinlock on Buff for a bit before he gets out with an electric chair. The Pittsburgh Plunge gets two but Buff gets in a Vader bomb for the same. A quick double arm DDT (Hudson: “The Kobashi DDT!”) puts Shane down so here’s Jarrett to interfere and Cat to cut him off. The Blockbuster gives Buff the pin.

Rating: C. Totally watchable match here and it’s nice to see something actually get a little time (less than six minutes is a marathon tonight) for a change. Douglas isn’t much to see in the ring and Bagwell was his usual self but at least we had something decent enough to watch. You can only watch so many three minute matches around here before it gets tiring.

Post match Cat wants to fight right now but it winds up being dance time instead.

Scott Steiner comes out for the main event but first of all he has something to say. He pulls out a box of Kleenex to cry over Sting but doesn’t need them because he isn’t really sorry for the injuries. Sting had a fair warning to walk away but he came to the ring anyway. Whenever he comes back, Steiner is more than willing to hurt him again. As for Flair, all he wants to do is screw Steiner out of his World Title. It doesn’t matter though because Steiner beat Goldberg at Fall Brawl and he can do it again anytime. Steiner can put Luger and Booker out of wrestling too if he has to because he’s a genetic freak.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Lex Luger

Steiner is on commentary, Luger is challenging and we’ve got less than five minutes left in the show. Luger gets kicked in the face to start, followed by an elbow to the jaw. Some forearms to the back have Booker in trouble and a backbreaker gets two. The champ gets in a spinning kick to the head and the ax kick sets up the Spinarooni. Cue Goldberg so Steiner gets up, triggering their big brawl. Luger loads up a chair but Goldberg gets in and spears Lex to give Booker the retaining pin.

Rating: F. This was about four stories mixed together in a match that didn’t even last four minutes. I don’t know who thought bringing Luger back was a good idea and I don’t know who thought putting him in the main event was an even better idea. The match barely existed of course because we needed to see the Cat dance earlier but did you want to see more of Luger?

Booker yells at Goldberg but has to fight off Steiner to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Pretty worthless show here other than to set up the Tag Team Title match on Sunday. The main event was one of those stories that was invented and blown off in the span of a night and went nowhere while not really changing anything. The wrestling was nothing to see, the angles were nothing interesting and the show did almost nothing to make me want to see Mayhem. Such is life in WCW as we approach one of its final pay per views.

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Thunder
Date: October 4, 2000
Location: Long Beach Arena, Long Beach, California
Attendance: 2,666
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Stevie Ray, Tony Schiavone

It’s the last stateside show for two weeks before they’re off to Australia to see if Russo’s brilliance can alienate another culture. Now that being said, Russo’s influence is certainly waning as his injuries are threatening to keep him off television, as well as away from the office to keep his stories going. Granted I’m not sure how strong the creative will be based on whoever WCW gets to run the sinking ship. Let’s get to it.

This show is dedicated to Klondike Bill, a longtime production boss for WCW who passed away.

Shane Douglas tried to get on Mike Sanders’ good side earlier and since they’re both heels (and kind of dumb), it worked.

Here’s Jeff Jarrett to open things up. He immediately gets to the point by insulting Sting, who apparently has lost his heart for the business and is a ghost of his former self. Sting may have been the man in WCW for the last 40 years but now it’s Jeff’s world. They’ll be fighting at Halloween Havoc….and here’s Beetlejuice. Yeah Beetlejuice, the small guy from the Howard Stern Show who has now been part of the swimsuit contest and changing the WCW World Title. That’s the logical progression you see.

Beetlejuice threatens to smoke Jarrett, who throws some mock punches. We cut to the back to see Booker getting knocked out by Steiner, followed by Sting running out for a fight with Jarrett. As they’re fighting, a fake Sting comes out of the crowd to lay out Sting with a pipe. That would be….Shane Douglas, who is taken away as Jarrett beats up Beetlejuice.

Booker is being taken away in an ambulance. No wonder WCW went out of business. Those ambulance bills probably cost more than Hogan.

Steiner keeps breaking stuff with the pipe.

Halloween Havoc video.

Sgt. AWOL vs. Jim Duggan

If this is the point you’ve reached in your feud, it might be time to pull the plug. Before the match, Duggan complains about the American flag having too many stars because there’s no unity. You can tell Duggan doesn’t want to be cutting this promo so AWOL (who sounds A LOT like Shane Douglas) interrupts him to get things going. It’s a brawl on the floor to start (dang I’m getting tired of having to write that on these shows) with Duggan getting the better of it and sending AWOL face first into the post.

They get back inside to keep slugging it out with AWOL taking over this time as the announcers talk about hockey. It’s time for the table but AWOL slams him into the announcers’ table instead. Back in and Duggan fights out of a chokeslam through the table, allowing Reno to sneak in with a kendo stick shot to give Duggan two. Back up and AWOL punches a chair into Reno’s face, allowing Duggan to slam AWOL through the table for the pin.

Rating: D-. This is where the relaxed rules get on my nerves. You can almost guarantee that whatever the main event tonight is going to be will have the same thing but I just watched it earlier in the show with two big lumbering power guys in a nothing match. Given where ECW was at this point, do you really want to be copying their business model?

Midajah is talking to Mike Sanders.

Sting is dedicated to WCW. That’s an understatement.

Here’s Mike Sanders for a chat. The Thrillers had a great night on Monday and won a bunch of titles with Sanders himself winning the Cruiserweight Titles on his own. It was all due to Russo of course, who is a complete genius. We see Luger sitting in the crowd again, which makes me wonder what the point was in having him do a match last week if he was just going to do the same thing he started the angle doing with no real explanation.

Sanders talks about Goldberg’s match at Halloween Havoc but doesn’t actually say who he’s fighting. Kronik comes out and teases High Times on Mike but lets him down gently. Sanders says these are two monsters to Goldberg’s one, which the announcers think means Goldberg vs. Kronik at the pay per view. Oh man you mean no Goldberg vs. Hard Work Bobby Walker? No buys.

Elix Skipper thinks he should get a rematch for the Cruiserweight Title.

Jung Dragons vs. Scott Steiner

Gah don’t they have some local jobbers to bring in instead? Like a young Samoa Joe or something? Stevie wants to kill Steiner for what he did to Booker. Yang’s martial arts and rapid fire punches have no effect to start as Scott clotheslines him down. A gorilla press sends Yang outside and a double team goes just as badly. All three get suplexed and something like a super Angle Slam makes things even worse. Leia Meow chokes Midajah as Scott Recliners Jamie and Kaz for the submission to complete the total squash.

Konnan is brought into Sanders’ office because he has immigration issues, meaning he’s not allowed to work tonight. Actually he isn’t allowed to leave this office because he’s a flight risk. Konnan says he’s an American citizen and can produce the paperwork he needs. That’s not good enough because he needs to have them on him at all times. Well that would be a very different story today.

Juvy and Rey love this best of five series and send Tygress off to get Konnan’s papers. Well at least he does carry them. She goes off right before Shane Douglas comes in to lay them out with a pipe and rant about Sting. That’s almost guaranteed to be the main event tonight.

After a break, Konnan checks on his downed buddies.

Mike Awesome talks to Crowbar about being a chick magnet. Crowbar is of course dressed like a pimp.

Video on Goldberg.

Stevie Ray is tired of all this Lex Luger stuff so he goes up to him for a little Suckas Gots To Know. Luger talks about watching all these no-names wrestle in his company, which brings him to General Rection. Last week Rection was just a prop and he’ll never be able to touch Luger. Cue Rection for a brawl which goes nowhere.

Kronik says they’re up for sale to the highest bidder. Ah yes the APA ripoff era.

Cruiserweight Title: Mike Sanders vs. Lance Storm

Storm is challenging. We get the full on Canadian national anthem, complete with the flag superimposed over Storm’s face, as this show continues to drag. Sanders charges to the ring and it’s on in a hurry. A dropkick puts Mike down early on but he comes back with a nice pumphandle suplex. Some suplexes get two for Storm but Reno pulls Sanders out to the floor for a save.

They fight to the apron with Storm DDTing Sanders as the Canadians and Thrillers fight on the floor. Storm takes Sanders back inside and puts on the Maple Leaf but Gunns rings the bell early for a distraction. Thankfully the camera was already on her and waiting for the plot device, making sure that nothing seemed realistic whatsoever. Storm yells at her but Rection comes out to throw Storm back inside for a rollup to retain Sanders’ title.

Rating: D+. So the Canadians are faces now? They’re certainly acting like faces who have been screwed out of titles and wrestle like good guys, but at the same time they’re holding Major Gunns, a face in theory, hostage. I know the theory is that everyone has shades of gray and not everyone is a clear face or heel but it’s really not making me interested. Instead it’s making me wonder what their motivation is because it doesn’t make sense from week to week.

It’s time for the sitdown interview with MIA. Rection gets annoyed at Tenay for not getting their names right before going on a rant about how there’s nothing good in sports entertainment. They’re only here because they love wrestling and do everything together, including sleep together. They all agree that they do everything together, which includes fighting Team Canada.

Apparently the Duggans and the Rections are friends and the General’s kids are asking why Uncle Jim did these things. There’s a lame comedy sketch to be made of Jim Duggan and General Rection having a barbecue together. They’ll be ready for Halloween Havoc. Tenay wasn’t a jerk here which is a very nice change of pace and hopefully a sign of things to come.

Tag Team Titles: Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak vs. Mike Awesome/Crowbar

Awesome and Crowbar are challenging with Crowbar declaring themselves two wild and crazy guys ala the Saturday Night Live sketch. Mike has to show him how to say it properly and they’re getting worse and worse with these ripoffs every week. Jindrak side slams Crowbar to start and brings in O’Haire who eats a nice dropkick. Awesome comes in to slap the champ in the face. So he’s a fat chick loving 70s guy who slaps people. This would be roughly six months after he debuted as a killer. The powers of Vince Russo everyone.

Mike remembers that he’s Mike Awesome and kicks O’Haire in the face before throwing him down with a German Suplex. Crowbar comes back in with a springboard splash before it’s back to Mark off a blind tag. The champs take over with some clotheslines and a double shoulderblock. They may not have the most in depth offenses but at least they look good doing the basics. Crowbar grabs a quick suplex but goes up top instead of tagging, allowing Jindrak to hit a hurricanrana, followed by a Seanton Bomb.

Everything breaks down and Awesome actually gets a tag (nice rules following for a change, though I guess the tagging isn’t included on the list of relaxed rules) and hits the Awesome Bomb and Awesome Splash for two on Mark. That’s enough wrestling though so here’s a table but Crowbar breaks up the double powerbomb with a double low blow to save his partner. Crowbar grabs a reverse DDT, only to get thrown through the table to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. There’s your match of the night as they made the thing work by just working hard out there. It’s always annoying to see someone like Russo come in and ruin everything by putting in so many stupid ideas that the wrestlers get bogged down. This however was more about four guys working to make the match work and it was entertaining stuff. Oh and a table just because.

Buff Bagwell arrives.

Clip of David Flair tormenting Buff on Monday before taking a Blockbuster.

Halloween Havoc video.

Here’s Buff to address the Stacy issues. Apparently Stacy, with her high Midi-chlorian count, got herself pregnant, because Buff always wears his stuff when he goes “there”. This brings out David Flair and a “doctor” (read as he’s wearing a white coat and has a stethoscope) to do a DNA test on Buff. Apparently the guy wants to give Buff a little prick, as in a blood sample, but the audio is censored anyway. Buff says he’s afraid of needles and then punches both guys out before leaving, telling David to figure this out. I think he just tried to Buff and you punched him in the face. That’s quite the mixed message.

Shane Douglas vs. Sting

You know, this actually sounds intriguing. I mean, not exactly in 2000 but a few years back this could have been something. Before the match, Shane talks about having a date with greatness and a job to do. Also, Torrie isn’t sure why this place smells so bad but thinks that everyone hates her because they’ll never be her. After a promise of something special for Shane back at the hotel, we’re ready to go. During Sting’s entrance, Tony starts hyping up the double Nitro/Thunder tapings, which should be some glorious disasters.

Sting sends Shane into the barricade to start as the announcers break the news of Booker vs. Steiner for the title at Halloween Havoc. The fight heads into the crowd to make sure we don’t need to see any real wrestling early on. They head back to ringside with Sting hitting Douglas in the back with a chair but Torrie offers a distraction to change things around.

We hit an abdominal stretch as the announcers talk about Torrie turning into a much more dangerous person on the outside. So she’s gone from a hot blonde there as eye candy to a hot blonde there as eye candy who trips people. That’s not quite a HHH and company level of Evolution. It’s more like that David Duchovny movie from 2001. Remember that? That’s how much Torrie has evolved.

Shane crotches Sting against the post and loads up a table in the corner as the announcers actually cover the relaxed rules over the last six months. My goodness this has been a long six months. Sting sends him through the table for a counter but Shane pulls out a chain to block the Stinger Splash. Konnan comes out to kidnap the highly evolved Torrie as Sting shrugs off FOUR CHAIN SHOTS TO THE HEAD. Instead it’s Jeff Jarrett coming in to knock Sting out with the guitar, setting up the Franchiser for the pin.

Rating: D. To recap: a breakaway guitar and a really bad looking jawbreaker knocked Sting cold but four punches to the head with a chain wrapped around the fist of a professional athlete who wanted to hurt Sting as badly as he could didn’t even knock him off his feet. I kind of liked Tony talking about the relaxed rules to make sure people knew what was going on. You know, the four new viewers WCW might have drawn that night in case they were too drunk to change the channel.

Overall Rating: D. You can kind of feel Russo’s influence waning a bit here. First and foremost, there were five matches on this show. Not eight, not ten, but five. Of those five, only one wasn’t long enough to rate and that was a squash. On top of that, a lot of the stories felt less complicated. Case in point: the stories were about the wrestlers, not the writer who is injecting himself into things because he feels like it. The show is still bad, but if you take away a lot of the insanity and the really stupid stuff, the wrestling will seem a lot better and can start to carry the show for a change.

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Monday Nitro #259
Date: September 25, 2000
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, Mark Madden

We have arrived. If you’ve read this far, you probably know what’s coming and you know there’s no way around it. Tonight we’re in Vince Russo’s hometown and he’s in a cage match for the WCW World Title. This is a show I’ve been dreading for a long time, even though it was pretty obviously coming months ago. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video designed like an inspirational sports story on Vince Russo, who has climbed the ladder to earn his destiny here in his hometown. Ignore the lines about him “growing up and wanting to be WCW Champion” as he would have gotten the WWWF and the WCW World Title didn’t exist until he was nearly thirty years old.

Opening sequence.

Earlier today Russo and Jeremy Borash arrived with JB now acting as Russo’s biggest fan. Russo: “WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP???”

Big Vito vs. Johnny the Bull

The announcers swoon over Vito’s sister Maria, who is sitting in the front row. This is a stick ball bat vs. a kendo stick match because those are different things (as well as extra phallic objects along with the pipe and baseball bat). Vito slugs away in the corner but gets taken down by a stick shot to the ribs.

The fans chant for Vito (also from New York of course) as he’s down in the corner, followed by a spinwheel kick from Johnny. Naturally the announcers preview the swimsuit contest later as they’re not even hiding the cheap ratings ploy. Vito comes back with some stick shots of his own and kicks Johnny into the ropes, setting up even more stick shots.

That would be the kendo stick of course because Vito is just that versatile. Cue Reno with a kendo stick of his own to lay out Vito before tying him in the Tree of Woe for sticks to the ribs. Maria jumps the barricade to shield Vito….and THAT’S the DQ instead of Reno pounding on him for a minute and a half.

Rating: D. The only good thing here was the very pretty Maria but I have a feeling where this is going. You know she’s related to one of them and there’s some backstory here, which to be fair is a much more interesting and coherent story (in theory at least) than most of the goofy stuff we get around here.

According to the announcers, that was an I Quit match and Maria did the submitting for him. I’m so glad they got around to that after plugging MAJOR GUNNS IS GOING TO BE IN A BIKINI LATER!

The announcers preview the main event.

Earlier this week, David Flair hijacked a pay phone and it’s attached phone book to find the baby father’s address. Thank goodness they showed him finding the address at THIS phone booth because there’s no other phone booth on the planet.

Here are Jarrett/Steiner/Midajah with something to say. Jarrett promises us a new champion tonight because the hometown boy is going to bring home the gold. Steiner can’t believe that people boo him when they cheer for the New York sports teams. We get an insult to a New York Jet and some shots at Goldberg before Steiner introduces Russo for some sucking up to the fans.

Russo lists off some great names in New York sports and says his name is going up in the rafters next to theirs. However, now he lives in Atlanta, where they have NASCAR, the Georgia Bulldogs (having a bad year at this point), cousins breeding with cousins and John Rocker. Russo doesn’t care much for Rocker, who went on some big rant about how much he hates New York City around this time. Cue Sting and Booker on the screen because we’re still not done talking about Russo. Sting says he has Booker’s back tonight but for now, Russo needs to turn around. Russo does just that and Goldberg is in the crowd.

Mike Sanders comes in to see Kronik, who are out of the tag team battle royal as per Russo’s orders. So the Thrillers are officially errand boys?

Tag Team Titles: Battle Royal

Rey Mysterio/Juventud Guerrera, Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire, 3 Count (all three members), Harris Brothers, Corporal Cajun/Lieutenant Loco, Jung Dragons (Jamie-San/Kaz Hayashi)

Last team standing wins the vacant titles and both members have to be eliminated. It’s a brawl to start of course as Konnan sits in on commentary, promising vengeance on Disqo and the Duck. Hayashi takes an H Bomb and is eliminated a few seconds later, laving Jamie-San on his own. Shane is sent over the top and through a table (of course) and here’s Kronik, who may or may not actually be in the match.

The Harris Brothers are put out in seconds and it’s time for Kronik to clean house. Adams dumps Jamie-San and Shannon, meaning all of 3 Count is eliminated because we missed Evan somewhere. There go the Misfits until security comes in to mace Kronik. We’re down to just the Thrillers vs. the Animals with Juvy fighting back as the Animals take over.

Rey gets crotched though (Hudson: “He got his bronco busted.”) and a Seanton Bomb makes it even worse. Cue Disqo to hit Juvy with the Duck (no effect of course), allowing Jindrak and O’Haire to dump him. The bell rings but Rey is still in, which we’ll call a referee screwup. O’Haire crotches Rey on top and Jindrak clotheslines him out for the titles.

Rating: D. More overbooked nonsense here as they could have just as easily done O’Haire/Jindrak vs. the Animals with the same finish or had the Animals defend in the battle royal. Instead they vacate the titles and have Kronik taken out for no explained reason (likely for not destroying Stevie well enough on Thunder), only to have Kronik make the entire division look like a joke. Well done indeed, as usual.

Pamela Paulshock is in the back with Howard Stern’s Wack Pack. Guess what they have to say. Of note, Paulshock is in a fur coat, which will come into play later. Nash and the Thrillers come in to interrupt them with Nash getting the only good line as he refers to Beetlejuice (a dwarf) as Elix.

Insane Clown Posse vs. Mike Awesome

This is over the bus and seems to be hardcore. Before the match, Violent J says Vampiro is out due to a broken spleen or something. We hear about some JCW wrestlers being hardcore but Mike is dead, just like the 70s. J actually isn’t a bad talker. Awesome drives the bus into the arena (thank goodness he was behind the wheel and right outside) and comes out swinging a fire extinguisher.

Shaggy hits him in the head with a trashcan and they pull Awesome on top of the bus. J is knocked off the engine and through a table, followed by an Awesome Bomb onto the top of the bus to Shaggy, who falls down to the concrete for the pin. This was a segment disguised as a match and really didn’t need to do that big spot.

David Flair, now with a camera in his car, goes to Chuck E. Cheese for directions. Since there’s already a camera set up inside, David is seen yelling at a worker and then searching through the ball pit for the father.

Here are Cat and Ms. Jones with the former calling out Russo. Cat is going to have Booker’s back tonight and promises to fire anyone who tries to interfere tonight. This brings out Mike Sanders with a ball bat. Mike: “Did somebody say Natural Born Thrillers?” Cat: “No. I said natural born ratings killers.” Egads man even the roster knows your show sucks at this point. The crowd swears at Sanders so the audio cuts out for a few moments before Sanders tells Cat to reverse that threat of a firing. The fight is on so here are Nash and the Thrillers for the big beatdown. Mark: “SPAY THE CAT!”

It’s time for the bikini contest with Gene and Pamela (still in fur coat) as emcees and the Wack Pack as judges. By the way: this is opening the second hour against Raw. The contestants (Chae, Chiquita, Torrie Wilson, Tygress, Paisley, Leia Meow and Major Gunns) come out and kind of disrobe, as some of them take their robes off while some open them but don’t take them off. Gunns goes last and has an American swimsuit, drawing out Jim Duggan to take her to the back.

The judges aren’t sure who wins so Pamela decides it’s time to take off her coat, naturally revealing a barely there top. She wins, so the actual contestants fight until Midajah comes out for one of the worst slams I’ve ever seen on Meow. The women looked good but when I can be watching Trish and Lita actually starting to develop as characters and having matches, this stops doing anything for me. Oh and over on Raw: Austin was recently back from injury and opening the show before Rock and Benoit had a World Title match later on. Guess how the ratings went.

Steiner is in the back for an interview when Goldberg attacks him.

Here are Disqo and his Duck, the former of whom doesn’t think much of the Animals. He wants to introduce his new partner but gets beaten down by Steiner. Scott calls out Goldberg, who immediately accepts but wants it in a cage with no referee.

Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner

Inside Caged Heat with ten seconds’ build. They brawl on the floor with Goldberg choking away as the cage is lowered. Goldberg throws him inside as the bell rings and my head shakes at how stupid this company really is. Steiner gets beaten down for the first minute or so until Scott comes back with a spinning belly to belly. A top rope clothesline puts Goldberg down, only to have him come back with a butterfly suplex.

There’s a low blow to put Goldberg down as Midajah comes out and just walks in to hand the pipe to Steiner. However, the New York Jet that Steiner insulted earlier jumps the barricade and keeps Steiner from leaving. Goldberg comes back with a spear (right into the pipe for no effect because the script doesn’t call for it) before walking out to win.

Rating: D-. Whenever you hear people praise Steiner vs. Goldberg, the automatic question is why didn’t they do it again at Starrcade. Well apparently that’s because they did it here, eight days later, inside the Cell in a match that didn’t even make five minutes and was more about a member of the New York Jets than any kind of revenge. Oh and again: THEY ANNOUNCD THIS SIX MINUTES BEFORE THE BELL.

You might think that the rematch of one of the most physical matches ever inside a cage would be a good way to open against this week’s Raw, but that spot was reserved for women in swimsuits, High Pitch Eric and Crackhead Bob. It’s the same short term thinking and the hope that people just happened to change the channel during the commercials for Raw and tune in to see whatever the latest thing WCW was rushing through at this point. I mean, it’s not like anyone was going to buy a pay per view to see these two fight so why not just throw it out here?

Goldberg says Russo is next.

Jeff Jarrett hits Beetlejuice with the guitar.

Booker promises backup for the main event. Thankfully he also has some devastating catchphrases to do some early damage to the boss.

General Rection vs. Jeff Jarrett

Rection shrugs off Jarrett’s early attack in the corner but misses a top rope elbow. Madden accuses the General of being a draft dodger as a sitout powerbomb gets two on Jeff. Cue Team Canada for a distraction, allowing Duggan to hit Rection with the board, setting up the Stroke to give Jeff the pin. Nothing match.

Jarrett puts Rection in the Figure Four until the Misfits come out for the save. That fails of course because the Misfits suck so it’s Sting coming out for the real save. The Canadians run but Storm wants Sting in a non-title match right now.

Sting vs. Lance Storm

This could be interesting. Joined in progress after a break with Storm in control and hitting that great dropkick for two. Three straight clotheslines have Storm in trouble but he crotches Sting on top. An elbow sends Storm to the floor where the Stinger Splash that always hits the barricade hits the barricade again. Back in and Storm gets two off a powerbomb but Sting starts his usual comeback. Storm however is CANADIAN and counters the Deathlock attempt into the Maple Leaf. After the rope is reached, Sting suplexes him down and puts on the Death Drop for the pin.

Rating: C. Fine little match here, even though it was a clean pin on the US Champion. To be fair though, it was Sting instead of some goon to set up a title shot. I can actually live with that a lot more easily as Sting is one of the biggest names ever in WCW and a loss doesn’t do him that much damage. On a related side note: Lance Storm lost and regained the US Title from Terry Funk on the house show circuit over the weekend. As you might guess, this wasn’t mentioned on TV.

David Flair goes inside and demands that the father come out. Then it turns out he has the wrong house so he goes next door but no one is home. Apparently the guy is out of town, whoever he is. How the person who tells David that the father isn’t home knows who the father is isn’t clear as they somehow never said the guy’s name.

Russo, in football pads and carrying a helmet, promises to win tonight.

The cage is lowered.

WCW World Title: Vince Russo vs. Booker T.

You can win by pin or escape and JB is on commentary. Russo jumps him with the bat to start as a bunch of people are guarding the door to keep Russo inside. Back up and Russo blasts him in the chest with the bat and throws in a ladder. There’s a third bat shot so Russo can go up and tear the roof open, only to have the wrestlers waiting on him. Sting repels down from the ceiling to stop Russo as well, allowing Booker to slam him for the champ’s first offense.

Russo loses the helmet and gets punched in the face, followed by a superkick. They head outside for some slow brawling but LEX LUGER of all people returns to give Russo a lead pipe through the cage. Therefore, Russo gets to beat the champ down even more before shoving the referee down. The EMTs get beaten down….save for one who is Ric Flair. Ric beats Russo down until the Thrillers come out to brawl with everyone at ringside, leaving Booker to ax and side kick Russo.

Like any schnook though, Booker grabs the mic for his catchphrase instead of leaving. Cue Goldberg to slowly come down the ramp, which freezes Booker at the door for absolutely no reason. Even Scott Hudson screams at Booker to leave. Instead he lets Goldberg in as Scott Steiner comes out to guard the door. Goldberg spears Russo through the cage wall to make him the champ, but Booker high fives Goldberg anyway to end the show.

Rating: Vince Russo. I wrote most of this on Monday but I had to wait a few days to be able to start talking about it. This is something that I knew was coming but I actually had to take a break and process what I just sat through. The match itself is of course inconsequential but the big thing here is of course, Russo, as always.

I’m actually struggling to come up with a way to rip on this match. It’s one of those things that you know is horrible on all counts but it’s hard to go into why. Above all else, and this is a spoiler (for a show fifteen and a half years old), the problem is that this show meant nothing. Booker would get the title back a week later by beating Jeff Jarrett, making this whole thing a big waste of time.

This was Russo’s last match in WCW as his injuries (the real ones, not the ones that caused him to have brain surgery like two weeks ago) kept him out of the ring. I know I’m supposed to feel sorry for him about that but I’ve sat through six months of Russo putting himself over Flair, Goldberg, and now Booker for the title. Now I’m supposed to care about his injuries and feel bad that he had to vacate the belt and not wrestle anymore?

The whole thing was nothing more than a vanity project for Russo as he’s actually turned the promotion and the company’s World Title into a trophy for himself. I mean, I know we talk about Hogan and his friends turning the company into a huge vanity project that was all a playground for themselves, but that’s exactly what Russo has managed to do here. This whole company is now about Russo and whatever makes him look good.

Why would ANYONE want to watch this company again? It’s not about the wrestling or the title anymore. They have now decided that Russo getting to win a title that he “wanted since he was a kid” was more important than Booker, Goldberg (the two of whom looked like morons to end the show) or anything else that could possibly be going on here.

Oh and on top of that: Russo dominated WAY too much of the match. Remember St. Valentine’s Day Massacre when Austin fought McMahon, and by fought I mean absolutely destroyed for most of the match until a low blow slowed Austin down for like thirty seconds? This was Russo beating on Booker with a bat until a bunch of interference changed things around and set up the finish.

Finally, and speaking of McMahon, no this isn’t the same thing as when McMahon won the title a year earlier. For one thing, McMahon winning the title was a nice surprise as he was a face at the time and gave the fans something they wanted to see, unlike Russo who gave himself something he wanted to see. It also helped that McMahon had taken a loss or two here and there. Like him or not, you can’t deny that McMahon will get beaten whenever the story calls him for him to.

Third, look at where the promotions were at the time. The WWF was on fire and absolutely crushing WCW in the ratings. Russo’s title win came when WCW hadn’t won a night in the Monday Night Wars in nearly two years. The solution is to give the heel writer (as in the person who isn’t the owner or the official boss) the title to make himself feel better in his hometown while taking it off Booker. In other words, everything was about Russo instead of something that might have helped advance a storyline. But hey, people still talk about this so Russo is totally justified in all of this right?

Overall Rating: F. In addition to the disaster that was the main event, we also have the rest of the show to make WCW look ridiculous. I can’t emphasize this enough: they gave away Steiner vs. Goldberg II in a nothing five minute match inside the Cell. That gets no time, but Russo’s cage match is given a week’s build because he’s a draw and a star?

In addition to that you have the usual way too high amount of gimmick matches for no logical reason other than “PEOPLE LOVE GIMMICK MATCHES”, wrestling that either has no time or is such a mess because they have nowhere to go without doing some stupid story. Oh and there’s the swimsuit contest, which made the women look like even bigger wastes of time than Russo thinks they are.

Overall, you can’t say this was the death of WCW because the company had clearly gone under way earlier than this though. Instead, this was taking WCW’s casket out of the tomb and robbing whatever Russo could get out of it for the sake of making himself look good. It’s one of those shows where you know what’s coming and it’s so depressing because there’s nothing that can be done about it. They made it clear a long time ago that this place is all about Russo and now they’ve only confirmed it. Normally I would say something like “enjoy your title Russo because you’ve killed it” but that would probably just make him laugh.

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Monday Nitro #258
Date: September 18, 2000
Location: Dom Cardillo Arena, Kitchner, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone

We’re past Fall Brawl and the big story is Booker getting the World Title back. It’s pretty clear that Scott Steiner is the next big challenger after his big win over Goldberg in one of WCW’s better matches of the year. The sad part is the match wasn’t even that great but WCW has gone so far down hill in match quality that it’s the best they can do. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio/Tygress vs. Natural Born Thrillers

That would be Jindrak/O’Haire/Palumbo/Stasiak (on commentary)/Sanders and this is still under elimination rules as we’re continuing last night’s match where it left off. Mysterio kicks Jindrak down to start but Mark grabs a fireman’s carry neckbreaker before bringing in O’Haire for a sitout powerbomb. For some reason Mark feels the need to hold Rey down for the Seanton Bomb, which hits Jindrak by mistake. That sets up a double pin with Tygress pinning Jindrak and Rey pinning O’Haire at the same time.

Stasiak pops up off commentary and crotches Rey so Palumbo can jump on his back. Palumbo plants Rey with a lifting sitout Pedigree (nice move actually) as Kwee Wee comes out and hits Stasiak with a chair, allowing Tygress to pin Stasiak at the same time Palumbo pins Rey. Geez people stop with the double pins. Why would the referee even count those things? So it’s Palumbo/Sanders vs. Tygress so it should be interesting to see how lame they can make the Thrillers look here.

The referee shoves Palumbo into a rollup for the pin so it’s one on one. Sanders slowly takes his shirt off so Tygress grabs a sleeper, only to get snapmared down. Rey springboards back in with a dropkick to set up a Stuff Buster (X-Factor with a lot of gyrations) for the final pin (with more gyrations).

Rating: F. What the heck was that? You just had Tygress and Rey Mysterio pin the Natural Born Thrillers in five minutes for the sake of what? A storyline that involves Paul Orndorff who wasn’t actually in the arena that night? That’s their best idea? Tygress gets some pins, Rey gets some pins, and the Thrillers look like bigger goofs than usual? So much for whatever momentum this company had from last night.

Kevin Nash is sitting in the back and says the Thrillers need a coach. Of course he has nothing to say about losing the title last night because, as we’ve established over the years, the World Title means nothing to Kevin Nash.

Post break, Nash has apparently been accepted as the Thrillers’ coach. His game plan for the night winds up spelling out YOU SUCK.

Stills of Booker winning the title and Steiner vs. Goldberg from last night.

We go to the back for Goldberg’s entrance but it’s Vince Russo instead because of course it is. Yeah it’s not Steiner getting this entrance but Russo, because he’s the real winner you see. Russo gets lost in the back because his sense of direction is overshadowed by his MANLINESS. We get a MANLY walk down the aisle as Russo does Goldberg’s poses before pulling out a registered letter. The letter, addressed to Mr. Russo your honor SIR, is from Goldberg which says he’s unworthy of working for someone like Vince Russo.

Goldberg has failed the fans over and over and is clearly a total disgrace and loser, so therefore he resigns from WCW. On top of that, all the children should be looking up to Russo, just like Goldberg is now. Russo finally calls out Steiner and praises him for getting rid of Goldberg once and for all.

Steiner rants about how awesome he is and how he won the battle of the monsters last night. All he wanted to do was beat Goldberg up so he owes the fans an apology for ruining his career. This draws a GOLDBERG SUCKS chant but Steiner cuts it off by saying he wants the World Title. Therefore, next week, he’s guaranteeing that he’s the next World Champion. It doesn’t matter who wins tonight because he’ll beat Sting or Booker for the title. Russo doesn’t think so but here’s Jeff Jarrett before he can elaborate.

Sting didn’t beat him on Thunder so Jarrett deserves the title shot. Before that goes anywhere, Russo cuts them off because HE is the boss with all the power around here. Now it’s Nash coming out to say that he should have the first title shot and the fans seem pleased. For some reason this means a tag match with the winner getting a title shot next week. It’s going to be Steiner/Jarrett vs. Nash/…..Russo, who has wanted to be WCW World Champion his whole life, because he deserves to be champion. The shocked look on Nash’s face makes me want a Super Shredder spinoff movie.

Post break Steiner and Jarrett say this can’t happen. Wouldn’t they want this to happen?

Torrie Wilson/Shane Douglas vs. Kwee Wee/Paisley

This is the result of an open challenge from Shane. Allegedly this is a mixed tag but for some reason only Paisley is on the apron. Kwee Wee gets two off an early clothesline as Torrie (in a racecar themed outfit for some reason) jumps up to the apron, only to get kissed by her non-partner. Shane grabs the Franchiser for two because Paisley wants to fight Torrie. Instead Shane fakes a tag to Torrie and Franchises Paisley for the pin with a five count for no logical reason.

Post break, Russo is telling Nash his plan (it involves getting heat and a hot tag) but Nash gets the chalk and writes BITE ME.

Booker and Sting get in a fight in the back before their match tonight.

Disqo is in Cat’s office….and he has a duck. Apparently Disqo thinks Cat sucks as Commissioner and wants his job. Cat: “YOU’RE RUNNING AROUND WITH A BLOW UP GOOSE!” A match is made for Disqo getting to be Commissioner for a day, but if he loses then Rey and Juvy are stripped of the Tag Team Titles.

Disqo vs. The Cat

Before I can retype the stipulations, Cat kicks him in the face for the pin, meaning Rey and Juvy lose the titles.

The Animals run Disqo off.

Nash says he’s out of the tag match so Steiner and Jarrett can work it out themselves.

Disqo bails.

We see Mike Tenay’s interview with David Flair where Flair beats up the mailman.

MI Smooth is in the ring and calls out David for a chat. Apparently Smooth knows something about the father of the baby if the price is right. This brings out David with a crowbar but Smooth calms him down. Smooth has a video tape that shows who the father is. David pays but beats Smooth down with the crowbar instead.

Russo suggests Kronik for the tag match but gets yelled at for his efforts.

David makes a guy play the tape because he can’t go buy a VCR.

Terry Taylor sends Mike Sanders to see Russo, who sends Sanders to take a tape to Kronik.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Sting

Booker is defending but Sting drives him into the corner to start. A clothesline puts the champ down, only to have him pop up with a side kick. The Death Drop is countered into a Bookend attempt but Sting reverses into a Fujiwara Armbar of all things. The Deathlock is loaded up but here’s Jarrett for the DQ because of course it’s Jarrett.

Steiner comes in to help with the beatdown, including a guitar shot to Sting. The heels put on matching submission holds.

Sanders gives Kronik the tape. That would be the audio tape because there are two tapes running around at the moment.

Jimmy Hart tells David that there’s a VCR in Smooth’s limo. That earns him another beating.

Kronik has heard the tape and freaks out because it was Jarrett and Steiner insulting them earlier. Russo makes a match for later.

Here’s Team Canada with Storm bragging about last night’s success before introducing Jim Duggan as the newest member. Duggan has cut his hair and shaved his face, making him look almost unrecognizable. He’s tired of fighting for a country that takes him for granted and treats him like garbage. When he fought Goldberg and was taken away in an ambulance, all he heard was a GOLDBERG chant. Now it’s all about Jim Duggan (or Dude Love, as this is the same promo that he used to turn heel after Wrestlemania XVI). Cue the Misfits and it’s time for a six man.

Misfits in Action vs. Team Canada

The Misfits, heels here, clear the ring to start as the fans tell them that they suck. Loco sends Rection into the corner for a splash to Skipper, followed by a running clothesline from Cajun. Storm comes in for some misdirection, allowing the tag off to Duggan. The retired guy that is. A-Wall chokeslams Skipper through the table as Rection comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Rection with the board (fine with the referee) for the pin.

Rating: D+. The wrestling wasn’t bad actually and the story is there, but the problem lies in the main character. Who in the world wants to see Jim Duggan as anything more than a comedy goof, let alone as one of the more important heels in the midcard? It’s a decent enough story, but not with Duggan involved.

Post match Duggan hits Rection in the knee with the board.

Steiner and Jarrett yell at Russo.

Mike Awesome and Gary Coleman arrive with Gary freaking out over getting beaten down last night. Why did he ride with Awesome then? Vampiro and the Clowns approach the empty bus.

Kronik vs. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner

Never mind of course as Nash and the Thrillers come out first with the former insulting Kronik. Sanders and Johnny are chosen to go out and beat up Kronik with predictable results. More Thrillers come out until it’s just O’Haire and Jindrak remaining for what could be an interesting match. Naturally that doesn’t happen as Steiner and Jarrett come in with a pipe, followed by the Stroke for the pin.

Russo goes to someone’s dressing room.

Vampiro and the Clowns have spray painted the bus.

Russo comes in to see Sting (thank goodness there was a camera in there already) and asks him to be the partner tonight. Apparently people have been saying Sting doesn’t have it anymore so it’s SHOWTIME FOLKS.

There’s going to be a swimsuit contest next week to crown Miss WCW. Howard Stern’s Wack Pack will be the judges. You can see it coming from here.

Mike Awesome comes out to rant about Vampiro and the Clowns making it very hard for him to be happy. Therefore, he wants a hardcore match with Vampiro RIGHT NOW.

Vampiro vs. Mike Awesome

Vampiro pounds away with the kendo stick to start but Awesome sends him to the floor for the big dive. They head into the crowd with Vampiro diving off a wall, drawing a badly censored chant. Back to ringside for some cookie sheets, which Tony thinks is worse because it’s industrial size. Vampiro’s superplex is broken up and Awesome scores with a top rope clothesline, only to get hit in the head with a trashcan. An Awesome Bomb through at able at ringside puts Vampiro away.

Rating: D+. Decent hardcore brawl here but it’s more sad than anything else. Awesome is far better than this due to athleticism alone but he’s stuck in some humorous gimmick, which likely exists for the sake of giving the writers something to laugh at. Oh and why is there a Hardcore Champion if we’re having hardcore matches like this with the title never being mentioned?

Booker goes in to see Russo, which freaks the boss out.

David has seen the tape and storms off to find Stacy.

Sting/Vince Russo vs. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner

Booker comes out instead of Russo, giving us something like the fourth different combination for this match. Whoever gets the fall gets the title shot next week, so I’m assuming Booker is off next week if he gets the pin. It’s a brawl to start with Sting getting two off a top rope splash.

There’s the Deathlock on Jarrett but Midajah hits Booker with the pipe. Cue Miss Jones to pull Midajah out and slam her as a tag match breaks out. It’s Booker playing Ricky Morton for a bit and it’s Jeff slapping on a sleeper. Booker finally fights up with a suplex to break things up, allowing the hot tag to Sting. Normally that wouldn’t make sense but Booker really doesn’t have anything to lose here.

Everything breaks down again and cue Kronik to go after Jarrett. Steiner kicks Booker low and puts on the Recliner but here comes Russo, looking like he’s been destroyed. Scott goes after Russo, allowing Booker to hit Steiner in the face with the bat. Booker puts Russo on top of Steiner for the pin and the title shot as the rules of this match are thrown out even further.

Rating: D. As usual, this could have been a nice tag match had they actually let us see a tag match but instead it was a big mess with so many storylines going on at once that it was hard to keep track of. The problem boils down to the fact that you could have the same match without Kronik but they’re thrown in there just because. When something can be taken away with no changes to the story, it’s unnecessary.

Overall Rating: F+. This was one of your run of the mill Russo shows with a lack of character motivation (Nash not seeming interested in wanting the title back), WAY too much Russo and a main event that kept changing over and over. It’s really not much of a draw to tell me to keep watching so I can find out who is teaming with Vince Russo in a match where he might become #1 contender for a match next week. There wasn’t a lot of wrestling here either, which would have cut down on the need for all the backstage stuff, though again that’s standard Russo. Not a good show here but it’s only going to get worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #257
Date: September 11, 2000
Location: Independence Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone, Jeremy Borash

It’s the go home show for Fall Brawl and we’re now back to the build for the pay per view after last week’s stand alone WarGames (in name only) show. Unfortunately that leaves the whole card starting from a dead end as last week had nothing to do with Booker vs. Nash or Steiner vs. Goldberg. Instead, we have a big story of David Flair marrying Miss Hancock and a possible Ric Flair appearance in another stand alone story. Let’s get to it.

David arrived earlier and Crowbar, Ozzy and Daffney greeted him to bury the hatchet. No sign of Ric though.

Jeff Jarrett thinks he should offer some entertainment for the wedding.

Opening sequence.

The arena lighting seems dark, probably to hide a low attendance.

Tag Team Titles: Filthy Animals vs. Kronik

Rey and Juvy are defending. Before the match, Disqo runs his mouth and ticks Kronik off even more after the Animals were laid out on Thunder. It’s a brawl to start as Konnan talks about throwing Rey in quicksand. We settle down to Adams pounding Juvy in the corner and hitting a quick F5, though the landing looked more like a DDT. Rey gets a blind tag and the Animals actually double suplex Adams. That’s quite the surprise but you can only be so shocked when Konnan is talking about no selling and taking bumps.

Clark comes in and plants Juvy with a full nelson slam but Adams gives Rey an even bigger one. Cue the Harris Twins (of course) for a distraction, allowing Disqo to hit Clark with a chair and give him the Last Dance on the floor. Back in and Juvy’s 450 (he hit the mat first) only gets two. Instead it’s the What’s Up with the legdrop (named the Nutcracker) retains the titles.

Rating: C. Such is life in WCW. I was actually starting to get into this until the Twins came in to screw things up. It’s interference to set up a match that isn’t interesting and most people don’t want to see, but for some reason we’re getting the Harris Twins in the top spot instead of ANYONE else. Also, what was up with wasting the 450 near the end?

Stacy Keibler arrives.

Recap of WarGames, complete with the line of “it’s another Russo swerve!”

Tony promises an update on Vince Russo, who has suffered his third concussion in three months. I understand that concussions are bad, but I’m having issues feeling sorry for Russo when he keeps injecting himself into these big matches. He’s getting all the glory in the matches and that comes with the damage. It’s almost like someone of average size shouldn’t be getting destroyed by people the size of pro wrestlers. Apparently Russo has had to have brain surgery. Tony: “Tonight: a wedding and brain surgery.”

Here’s the Cat to say he’s in charge because Russo’s injunction was thrown out of court. Therefore, Booker vs. Nash on Sunday is now in a cage. As for tonight though, Nash is defending the title against Scott Steiner. That leaves Jeff Jarrett, who Miss Jones wants to fight. Jarrett comes out and promises to win and prove that men are superior to women. He’s even willing to wrestle handcuffed. Cat and Jeff start fighting until Steiner comes out to put Cat in the Recliner.

Booker and Sting (without paint) arrive and don’t seem worried that Steiner and Jarrett are taking over.

Big Vito vs. Reno

Stick ball bat on a pole, which is how things go in the neighborhood apparently. It must be one of the slums of Parts Unknown. Palumbo is here with Reno. Vito starts fast with a Japanese armdrag but has to go after Palumbo. A quick suplex drops Reno but the referee gets bumped. Vito grabs the stick, only to have Reno lay him out with the Roll of the Dice for no count. Cue the returning Johnny the Bull to help stand off with the Thrillers, only to turn on Vito (a full THIRTY SECONDS after coming out to defend him), giving Reno the pin.

The rest of the Thrillers come in to beat Vito down. I can’t get over the fact that this is supposed to be a swerve. It really was just thirty seconds.

Cat yells at Booker and Sting for being late but they leave together.

Steiner/Jarrett/Nash say they’re in charge tonight. Booker/Sting/Cat come in with the latter saying he’s in charge.

Madusa says she doesn’t like the women around here even though she trained them. Therefore, tonight she gets to beat up Torrie Wilson.

Torrie Wilson vs. Madusa

The announcers talk about the history of scaffold matches and we actually get a Jim Cornette reference. Madden: “Cornette fell off the scaffold and ended his career. He just doesn’t know it yet.” Madusa beats on her for about twenty seconds before Shane comes in for the DQ.

Post match Shane puts Madusa in an STF (of course) until Kidman comes in for the save. Yeah these two are feuding in case you forgot. Madusa adds herself and Torrie to make it a tag team scaffold match on Sunday. Did they really forget the lessons from Great American Bash 1991?

Crowbar helps David get ready.

Jimmy Hart hands Miss Hancock an envelope.

Mike Awesome shows up in That 70s Bus.

Nash suggests that Steiner lay down for him tonight.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Miss Jones

Apparently Goldberg is going to be enforcer in the World Title match. Jarrett rants about “broads” thinking they can compete with men in this ring. Remember Jeff is going to wrestle handcuffed. Tony: “That means he can’t use the Stroke or the guitar.” Yeah the guitar is illegal here, meaning it’s legal otherwise. Cat gets in a few cheap shots before the bell and Jones hammers away, only to kick the referee low by mistake. Jeff kicks her in the ribs to break up a guitar shot before knocking her out with it for the pin.

See, if they actually wanted to go with something interesting here, have the trained wrestler Madusa fight Jarrett in what could be an entertaining match. Instead, we get another woman getting beaten up with little to no defense.

Anyway post match, Awesome comes out to beat up the still handcuffed Jarrett.

Nash is drawing his plan on a dry erase board. After some jokes about anatomy, Steiner thinks he should win and throws a marker. Just have them SWERVE us already so they can laugh.

Post break, Jarrett is annoyed at Nash for not coming down to help him (Nash and Steiner had said they were turning off the monitor so it’s not a huge issue). Jarrett tells Nash to deal with their stupid friend.

Here’s Jim Duggan with something to say. Duggan is so thankful to have gotten through cancer and is glad to be back here with the fans. However, in the last few weeks, he’s been realizing that he can’t beat Father Time. He’s been around for twenty years and unlike some people, he’s fine with stepping aside so the young talent can make wrestling into something we can all be proud of.

Duggan announces his retirement before talking about how he needs someone to take up the 2×4 and the American flag. That man is General Rection and there goes the idea. Rection comes out and shakes Duggan’s hand but here are Lance Storm and Major Gunns (now in a Maple Leaf top and white shorts) with the former saying no one cares about this. A non-title match is set up and we’re on.

Lance Storm vs. General Rection

Storm stomps him down to start as Duggan jumps in on commentary to say “come on Hugh.” A suplex brings Rection over the ropes for two but he powerbombs Storm out of the air for two. No Laughing Matter misses and the Maple Leaf goes on but Duggan points out the arm under the ropes. Duggan gets knocked off the apron so he hits Storm with the 2×4, right into a powerslam for the pin. Well at least Duggan didn’t turn on America. That would have been ridiculous.

Stacy opens the letter she got earlier and freaks out.

It’s time for the wedding with the bride and groom down to the ring in a hurry. Naturally we get a promo with David talking about how he’s let a lot of people down. That means he’d like Arn Anderson to come out here right now. Anderson says it might not be today and it might not be tomorrow, but his 21 year old buddies are going to call him and ask him to do something. It’s easier to get forgiveness than permission.

Also hide some of that wedding money because one day you’re going to come home late and she’s going to get mad, but then she’ll tell you to go get a good night’s sleep. When that happens, take that money and RUN. That’s all the advise from Arn, which is a shame because that was hilarious.

David isn’t done yet though as he wants someone special down here as his best man: his dad, Ric Flair. Cue a smiling Ric, now with hair again (though it’s a bit spiky now instead of the classic style). Ric says he’s a proud father tonight and he can’t wait to have this beautiful woman as part of his family in the greatest city in the world. No drama here so it’s time for the wedding.

As the minister goes on, here are a bunch of security guards and cops to arrest Ric. Apparently Vince Russo has taken out a restraining order against him and Ric has to be arrested for coming within 100 feet of this building. Ric is arrested and taken away, sending Stacy running out of the ring. So in other words, even when he’s not here, HAHA MANLY RUSSO WINS!

After a break, Ric is put in a cop car and driven away. Arn promises to bail him out as soon as possible.

The announcers talk and you can see that the entire section off the floor behind the desk is empty. The whole arena only holds 9,600 people and assuming they have most of the fans on one side of the arena, they MIGHT have 2,000 people there.

We see some of Russo’s beatings and now it’s time for the video of his brain surgery. It’s accompanied by a doctor talking about how hard this has been on Russo and how he’ll be out for a long time. You know, because we need to feel sorry for our top heel. Tony doesn’t buy the story so maybe it’s not as stupid as it seems.

Sting vs. Harris Brothers

If Cat is in charge tonight, why did he book Sting like this? The Brothers have chains for whatever reason but Sting hits the Splash and gets Don in the Deathlock in about a minute. Ron makes the save so here’s Kronik with chains of their own to choke out the twins. The beating goes on for a long time and Sting is put on top for the pin. What was the point here? Sting has a match on Sunday but other than a quick mention, this was all about Kronik and the Brothers.

Steiner yells at Jarrett.

Stacy is still freaking out when David comes in. He doesn’t care about anything that happened tonight because he just wants to marry her. Stacy says no but he talks her into it.

It’s time for another try at the wedding with the minister talking about trust. That’s too much for Stacy because, shock and awe, David isn’t the father of the baby. David freaks and Stacy runs off. The announcers find this funny for some reason.

Post break, Stacy jumps in a limo and David can’t get there. We pan over to Awesome escorting Pamela onto the bus until Jarrett lays him out. The Thrillers come in to keep up the beating.

Steiner yells about his freaks and the Earth rotating on a 47 degree axis. He’ll beat on Goldberg too.

The announcers talk again and fans have been moved in to fill in the gap. I’m stunned that the production staff actually pays attention. Or that they exist for that matter.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

Nash is defending, Cat is on commentary, Booker T. is guest referee and Goldberg is enforcer. Before the match, Booker promises to get the title back on Sunday. Steiner (still with a protective mask on) isn’t interested in the fingerpoke so Nash tries to leave. That’s not cool with Scott so they actually start fighting. Nash takes over to start until Steiner scores with a clothesline and the bicep elbow. Booker counts slowly and it’s time to beat up the referee. Goldberg comes in and I’m assuming the match is thrown out somewhere in there.

Another referee tries to come in but gets sent to the floor as Steiner suplexes Goldberg. Booker is down on the floor and Cat stays on commentary as the good guys are beaten down. Cat finally takes a chair away from Steiner, allowing Goldberg to start his comeback. It’s Booker beating on Nash as it’s clear that a tag match would have been a decent idea here.

The other referee is circling this stuff like it’s a match for whatever reason….and here’s That 70s Bus down the aisle. The Thrillers come out and start brawling as well, followed by Jarrett with a pipe. Booker gets powerbombed and thrown through the windshield. Now it’s Goldberg being handcuffed to the front of the bus but he breaks the grill off as we go off the air.

Overall Rating: F. I know I say this a lot but what a mess this was. Sunday’s two big matches were set up a bit but there was just so much other stuff going on that there’s no way to get behind the show. The ending was a disaster and just another part of all the messiness that bogged the show down. The longest match was about four minutes (the opener) and the rest of the show was a combination of men beating on women, the double wedding and short angles disguised as matches.

I really don’t have an interest in Sunday’s show and so much of that is because I can barely remember most of the card. As usual, one of the major problems of this kind of booking is trying to keep track of why something happened. Why are Goldberg and Steiner fighting? I’m not entirely sure, though I’m sure it was some swerve that came a few weeks ago. The swerves kind of run together after awhile, especially when you can see them coming so far away. Russo really doesn’t have a ton of ideas and once you get a handle on him, any magic he might have goes away in a hurry. Really bad show this week but that’s to be expected.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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This is one of the most difficult shows of the year to predict and it’s not just because of the battle royal. Aside from the big main event, it’s hard to guess a lot of the title matches because there’s a chance that they’re starting a new title program but they also might just be extending the current ones a few more months. Then there’s the whole “let’s throw the roster into one match for the title.” Let’s get to it.

We’ll start on the pre-show with a nice little concept: a four way tag with the winning team getting Rumble spots. We’ve got Darren Young/Damien Sandow (So are the Players officially split?) vs. the Dudley Boyz vs. Ascension vs. Mark Henry/Jack Swagger. Ascension is written off of course and there’s no reason to pick Young/Sandow. Therefore, we’ll go with the only team remaining and the only one comprised of two former World Champions. Neither guy has a chance of winning but the more former World Champions you add to a World Title match the more prestige it has. If nothing else due to how lame the other options are.

Del Rio retains the US Title. Why? Well for some reason WWE insists on making us sit through as many boring Del Rio matches as we can while the title gets less and less interesting every single week. I had a good time believing that Kalisto could go somewhere as champion but in the back of my head I knew WWE would hand it back to Del Rio as soon as possible. I have no idea who takes it off him (AJ maybe?) but it’s not going to be Kalisto at this show.

I’ll go with Ambrose keeping the title from Owens. In theory Owens should be in line for a big match at Wrestlemania and I can’t imagine they put the title on him beforehand. Last man standing is a good way to have him lose but still keep him looking strong as Dean could win through shenanigans after a long fight. As long as they don’t do the lame and way overdone “trap him under some big object” ending, this should be a really wild brawl that both guys are capable of delivering. Ambrose wins, though both guys should be in the Rumble too.

In a pick that doesn’t make a ton of sense, I’ll go with the Usos to win the titles off New Day. It’s not that New Day isn’t entertaining still (though the Jericho stuff has been horrible), but they’ve cleaned out the division more than once now so unless Enzo/Cass or Gable/Jordan are coming to the main roster like Monday or something, who else is New Day supposed to fight?

Charlotte retains, likely setting up a match against Sasha Banks as we roll into Wrestlemania, which could set up Bayley vs. Sasha on the main roster. Not that WWE is smart enough to pull that off of course. We’re likely setting for the return of Nikki to challenge Charlotte in a copy of AJ returning to take the title from Paige in 2014.

That brings us to the main event and good night where do you start? Well actually you start with Reigns based on Monday, but I think it finishes with HHH. Yeah as simple of a story as they have, I really do think this winds up being HHH coming out in the last spot and defeating a worn out Reigns to win the title. However, I don’t think it sets up HHH vs. Reigns at Wrestlemania. Instead I think they’ll do that match at Fastlane and then set up Reigns vs. Lesnar II at Wrestlemania. I can’t imagine they keep the title on Reigns as if nothing else, it leaves no one as a realistic challenger.

Now for the interesting parts: the surprises. Counting the two names from the pre-show, we’ll have fifteen names announced. I won’t bother trying to predict all fifteen as it’s likely going to be one or two of the Social Outcasts and a bunch of midcard fillers plus HHH to cap it off. That leaves a handful of spots for legends and new names so here are a few guesses.

Word on the street is they’re putting the Tough Enough winner in there for some hazing. If so, whatever. It’ll take two minutes and no one is going to remember because Tough Enough winners barely ever mean anything because it’s a stupid concept that doesn’t work.

I don’t think we get AJ Styles and I’d almost bet on the fact that we don’t get Daniel Bryan. AJ likely debuts the next night or the next week and Bryan being in the Rumble would be a borderline disaster based on the last two years. Both guys would be fun, but the problem boils down to this: what’s the point of bringing them in if they’re just going to lose?

For legends picks, let’s go with Jim Duggan and……Papa Shango. Why? Well why not? If they can bring in the Boogeyman last year, why not bring in Shango here? I’ll throw in Vader too, just so the announcers can make a lame Star Wars joke.

Finally, I’ll go with Sami Zayn as the NXT representative. The fans know who he is and he can go right back down to NXT to build towards Sami vs. Balor at Takeover.

Overall, this is always a show worth looking forward to. The Rumble is one of the few matches that is always fun due to the drama and surprises included and this has the potential to be something awesome. I like the idea of putting the title on the line as it really does feel like the biggest Rumble of all time. Reigns is likely dropping the belt here to set up his big win at Wrestlemania, but this has the potential to throw a huge curveball. I know HHH vs. Reigns is likely at some point, but there’s always the chance that it could go another way.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Royal Rumble 1990
Date: January 21, 1990
Location: Orlando Arena, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jesse Ventura

We hit the 90s and there’s a bit of a new feel to the company with that new decade. Things are now being made to look a little newer and it’s probably a good thing that they are. Oh and there’s also probably the biggest moment in the Rumble for…..arguably ever actually so there’s that to look forward to. Let’s get to it.

We get the list of almost everyone in the Rumble to start just like last year.

Jesse Ventura in Mickey Mouse Ears is a scary sight.

Buschwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeaus

We get ALL AMERICAN BOYS for the Rougeaus and Jacques has his MANLY beard. This is a Wrestlemania rematch from the previous year. We start with Butch vs. Ray and while this may sound like a stretch, I think this might be a comedy match. A quick sleeper by Ray is broken up and it’s time to bite the trunks as well as the referee for some reason. The Whackers clear the ring but Jacques hits the floor to avoid the Battering Ram.

Off to Luke vs. Jacques, with Luke taking a bite out of his nose. Jacques says hit me in the face, so Luke charges with a clothesline and hits Ray instead. Things slow down again and the Rougeaus easily distract Luke, allowing Ray to jump him for two. Ray comes in for real and kicks Luke down for two more. Luke is sent to the floor and goes back first into the apron. This match is already dragging.

Back in and Luke bites some more but it doesn’t get him anywhere. Luke gets rammed into the corner a bit, drawing Butch in which allows even more double teaming. We hit the chinlock followed by an abdominal stretch from Jacques. Now it’s off to a reverse chinlock to keep things slow.

We get the Arn Anderson cannonball drop onto a guy on the mat but the guy on the mat gets his knees up to crush Arn’s balls spot, followed by a hot tag to Butch. The Rougeaus are sent into each other and Jimmy Hart gets involved and beaten up. Jacques gets a quick rollup for two and Ray puts a Boston Crab on Butch. With the Rougeaus hugging for some reason, the Battering Ram to the back of Ray is enough for the pin by Butch.

Rating: D+. This was WAY too long at nearly fourteen minutes. The idea behind comedy matches is to keep things quick so that people don’t realize that half of the stuff you see here is stupid. The Rougeaus clearly didn’t care anymore and this would be the last match of Ray’s career. Jacques would go on to be the Mountie and win the Intercontinental Title, in one of the biggest surprises ever. Well not really but it was pretty surprising.

Gene is with DiBiase and Virgil and Ted is annoyed. Gene brings up the shenanigans last year with Ted “drawing” number thirty, but this year there’s additional security. Virgil drew the number for DiBiase and he got number 1. DiBiase’s “Let me tell you something little man” is a GREAT delivery as he’s so great at talking down to people.

The Genius vs. Brutus Beefcake

If you’re not familiar with Genius, think Damien Sandow if he read WWF themed poetry. Oh and he’s a jobber. And Macho Man’s real life brother. Genius offers a left-handed handshake but Brutus isn’t interested. Jesse gets on Tony about Genius beating Hogan via countout on SNME. Tony: “Well…..” Jesse: “WHO WON THE MATCH???” Genius heads to the floor for a cartwheel and we finally get the first lockup.

We get a clean break and Beefcake tells Genius what he can kiss. They lock up again and Genius goes to the eyes to get the first advantage. Beefcake comes out with an atomic drop and Genius gets to do his way overdone selling. I miss that. Back in and Genius fires off some shockingly good punches so Brutus comes back with an even bigger punch. Expect to hear the word punch a lot in this match.

Beefcake steps on Genius’ fingers like a total jerk and crotches Genius on the top rope. Half of Beefcake’s taunts would get him fired today for suggesting that Genius is effeminate. We go back to the standard story of the match: Genius gets in some strikes, Brutus hits him once to take over again. A dropkick gets two for Genius as does a rollup, but Brutus catches him coming off the middle rope with a punch to the ribs.

There’s the sleeper but Genius quickly escapes. Another sleeper attempt is quickly countered, but the Genius is knocked into the referee. Ref bumps weren’t cliched back in the 80s, so this is kind of a big development. Anyway the sleeper goes on again and Genius is going down quickly. Brutus puts him out and starts cutting his hair, but Genius’ buddy Mr. Perfect comes out for the save and the DQ.

Rating: D. This is one of those matches that was bad but it was energetic. For as much of a mess as Brutus would become in real life, the guy could get the fans fired up. That’s pretty impressive as he was almost all punching and a sleeper. This was pretty lame stuff but the fans loved it which is the right idea.

Perfect and Genius DESTROY Brutus’ ribs with the chair post match.

Sean Mooney is with the Heenan Family and suggests that they could fight each other. An argument ensues. That’s what Mooney was good at: ticking people off.

A show is coming. It’s called Wrestlemania.

Greg Valentine vs. Ronnie Garvin

This is a submission match as they both use submissions for a finisher. See? Not that complicated. Now the interesting thing here is that both guys have shin guards (Garvin even has his named: the Hammer Jammer) which blocks the pain of a Figure Four. They slug it out to start with Valentine being rammed into the buckles repeatedly. Greg comes back with chops and they slug it out in the middle of the ring.

It turns into a boxing match until Valentine goes after the leg. That gets him a thumb in the eye and they slug it out some more with both guys going down via a Garvin headbutt. Ronnie tries a sunset flip for reasons of stupidity and Valentine tries a cover of his own. Both guys go down again as this match is already running too long. Garvin rolls him up again to REALLY make it clear that it’s a submission match. See, wrestling fans are stupid and can’t understand the basic explanation of the rules.

Valentine adjusts his own shin guard (the Heartbreaker) and puts Garvin in the Figure Four. Ronnie’s guard blocks the pain, so Garvin makes funny faces at Valentine. Since that doesn’t work, Valentine puts on an over the shoulder backbreaker, much to Jesse’s delight (his old hold). Garvin pounds away in the corner and puts on an Indian Deathlock which has an effect on Greg but Valentine finally makes a rope.

They slug it out for the fifth time, although this one is at least on the floor. Valentine backdrops out of a piledriver on the concrete and we head back inside. Garvin misses a dropkick in the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. That goes nowhere so they collide again and both guys go down. Hart steals Garvin’s shin guard and there’s the Figure Four. After a rope is grabbed, Garvin can’t even stand up.

Valentine goes up and Garvin slams him down from one leg. He takes off Valentine’s shin guard and tries a rollup because Ronnie is STUPID. Valentine gets tied up in the ropes so Garvin beats up Hart for fun. A shin guard shot to the head knocks out Valentine and the Sharpshooter (called a reverse Figure Four) makes Valentine give up.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match here and it was even good at times, but MAN it was long, running nearly seventeen minutes. On top of that, the stupid pin thing went WAY too long into the match. This is probably the best Garvin match I’ve ever seen, but that doesn’t really mean much as he absolutely sucks most of the time.

Mr. Perfect doesn’t like Beefcake trying to take advantage of the Genius and we get a look at the chair attack from earlier tonight. Perfect says he got #30 in the Rumble. Well he is perfect after all.

It’s time for the Brother Love Show. You might know Love as Bruce Prichard, or one of the Gut Check judges on Impact. This is his most famous role, as a parody of 80s televangelists. He talks about what it means to be a lady, and brings out the woman whose picture is in the dictionary next to the word lady: Queen Sherri. Love sucks up to her and says he also looked up the word peasant in the Book of Love. The Book of Love is the dictionary?

Anyway the point is Sapphire (Dusty’s chick) is the definition of a peasant, making her fat and ugly. Sapphire comes out and they make fun of her looks, clothes and whatever else you would expect them to make fun of, while not letting Sapphire say a word at all. Now they make fun of Dusty for being fat and Sapphire finally blasts Sherri. Savage and Dusty come out and it’s a big brawl. Even Brother Love gets in on it until security breaks it up. A dance party ensues between Dusty and Sapphire, resulting in Love being thrown to the floor.

Duggan doesn’t have much to say about his match with Boss Man.

Big Boss Man vs. Jim Duggan

Boss Man has clearly lost a TON of weight since last year and he looks much better as a result. Duggan knocks him to the floor in a bump that Boss Man couldn’t have taken a year ago. They slug it out on the floor with Duggan taking over for a bit. Back inside and Boss Man reverses a whip before crushing Duggan with a splash. Boss Man busts out an ENZIGURI to put Duggan down again. It really is amazing to see how much better Boss Man looks after being a big fat blob last year at this show.

Boss Man hits his running crotch attack on the ropes to keep Duggan in trouble but he makes the mistake of ramming Jim face first into the buckles. Duggan’s comeback is short lived though as Boss Man hits him in the back to take over again. He cannonballs down on Duggan’s ribs as this is a good physical fight so far.

That of course comes to a screeching halt as we hit a neck crank by the cop. Duggan fights up and makes a quick comeback, only to get caught by a knee lift to the ribs. Back to the neck crank followed by a bearhug which Duggan fails to break with some smacks to the head. Instead he falls into the ropes and the brawl continues.

They slug it out some more and Duggan clotheslines him out to the floor. Back in and more punching (notice a theme here?) ensues by Jim. Boss Man comes back with a clothesline but misses a top rope splash. They collide again to put both guys down but Slick slips the nightstick to Boss Man which draws the DQ.

Rating: C+. They definitely made the right move here by going with a pure brawl instead of anything resembling a wrestling match. The fans absolutely love Jim Duggan so there was no way the crowd wasn’t going to be into this. Not a good match from a quality standpoint, but it was very fun which is the better way to go sometimes.

Wrestlemania is still coming.

We get some promos from guys in the Rumble, most of which are spent talking about whoever they’re feuding with at the time: Earthquake, Bravo, Demolition, Bad News Brown, Dusty Rhodes, the Rockers, Hercules (calling it the Rumble Royal, which was the original name for the show actually), Rick Martel, Tito Santana, Snuka, Akeem (Slick does the talking) and Warrior (Intercontinental Champion), who talks about Hulk Hogan. This would have given fans chills up their spine at the thought of it happening but then they would say “Nah, that couldn’t happen.”

More promos as we’re in intermission: Savage, the Powers of Pain (Fuji does the talking), Roberts, the Hart Foundation, Honky Tonk Man and Hogan (WWF Champion of course) who looks either bloated or high as a kite.

Royal Rumble

DiBiase is #1 and Koko B. Ware is #2. Ted jumps Koko as he gets in and stomps him down. The beating goes on for awhile until trying to ram Koko’s head into the buckle, which has no effect. See Koko is black and in WWF logic, that means he has a hard head. Koko fights back and misses a charge, sending him to the floor. Marty Jannetty is in at #3 and in literally one second less time, basically the exact same thing happens as did to Koko (minus the racial aspects) and Marty goes out.

Jake Roberts is #4 and they fight on the floor which I think is a first in the Rumble. DiBiase slams him on the floor before they head back inside. A backdrop puts DiBiase down but the DDT is countered into another backdrop. They keep brawling and #5 is Randy Savage. DiBiase and Savage forget their past hatred to double team Jake for awhile until Roddy Piper is #6, setting up one of those AWESOME tag matches we never got. Seriously, that would be excellent on a Coliseum Video.

Piper and Jake beat up the heels, nearly punch each other, and then beat up the heels even more. The energy for this match is WAY better than the previous two years, which is saying a lot. Warlord is #7 and he should be solid cannon fodder for some of these guys. Piper pairs off with him as DiBiase and Savage continue their beatdown on Roberts. Roddy makes the save until Bret Hart is #8, drawing a BIG pop.

We get a six man tag for all intents and purposes, which would be another pretty interesting one with Bret being there to bump like crazy for Warlord. Bret goes after Savage, which would be great like their match on SNME. Bad News is #9 as the good run of talent continues. Jake loads up a DDT on DiBiase but Savage clotheslines him out, which is probably a good idea given how many people we’ve got out there.

Dusty Rhodes is #10 and the place continues to erupt. He heads right for Savage as you would expect him do and it’s elbows a go-go. A backdrop puts Savage out and we get Brown vs. Dusty for awhile, which I’m not sure what to think of. DiBiase takes Brown’s place which is probably the right idea. Andre is #11 and the fans aren’t sure what to think of this. Warlord goes right to him and gets tossed to a big pop. The fans still love the Giant.

Heenan and Fuji get into a fight on the floor as Andre rams Piper and Dusty’s heads together before crushing them in the corner. They come back on him and it’s the Red Rooster at #12. Even HE gets a bit of a pop before people realize that’s who just came out. Piper eliminates Brown but Brown comes back to the apron and eliminates Piper. They brawl to the back, setting up one of the strangest matches you’ll ever see at Mania.

Andre beats up Rooster and tosses him out as Ax is #13. Their teams are fighting over the tag titles at this point so there’s a story there. Hart and Rhodes try to throw out DiBiase and we get the traditional Andre is tied up in the ropes spot. Haku, Andre’s partner, is #14. Andre stands on Ax as Haku beats on Dusty. Things slow down a bit, which is understandable after the very hot first twenty minutes.

Smash is #15, giving us a group of Ax, Smash, Haku, Andre, Hart, DiBiase and Dusty. Demolition demolishes Andre down for the second time in two years before going off to beat on Haku. Rhodes and Hart beat on Dusty as people swap partners a bit. Akeem is #16 to give us another big fat guy in there. He goes after the Giant, but it’s a Demolition double clothesline that eliminates Andre. I’ve always loved that moment. Bret went out somewhere in there too.

Here’s Snuka at #17 to go after Akeem and take him out with a running headbutt. Ted and Dusty hammer away on each other a bit more until Dino Bravo is #18 with his manly powder blood trunks. Demolition beats up DiBiase and Earthquake is #19. There’s another team getting back to back numbers. Rhodes is out at Earthquake’s hands, as is Ax. Neidhart is #20, giving us Neidhart, Earthquake, Haku, Bravo, Snuka, Smash and DiBiase. Everyone gangs up on Earthquake and eliminates him, much to Bravo’s chagrin.

Neidhart and Smash work together on DiBiase, which would be unthinkable in about eight months. Here’s Warrior at #21 to go right after Bravo. They’ve got a bit of a feud going right now so Warrior dumps him with ease. Things slow down until Martel is in at #22. Haku backdrops Smash to the apron and superkicks him out. We were getting too many people in there so that’s a good idea.

Tito is #23 and of course we get a Strike Force battle, as they feuded for like, ever. Honky Tonk Man is #24 as things slow down a bit. We need another blast of energy in this soon. A bunch of people get together and dump Neidhart and Warrior clotheslines DiBiase out, giving him a new Iron Man record at just under 45 minutes. At the moment we’ve got Warrior, Honky, Martel, Santana, Snuka and Haku. Remember that blast of energy I said we needed? Hulk Hogan is #25.

Snuka goes after him and is immediately put out. Haku takes a big boot and is gone. Warrior and Martel dump Santana and we’re down to four in the ring. Shawn Michaels is #26. Hogan dumps Honky and it occurs to me that for some reason the entrance music for people stopped after like #6. Hogan dumps Honky, Warrior dumps Shawn and Martel and there are only two left in the ring.

This is the moment that changed the course of wrestling for a LONG time. You often hear the expression “everyone is on their feet”. In this case, that’s literally true as the place goes nuts and everyone in unison stands up. It’s a really cool visual and proof that this would work for Wrestlemania. They collide a few times and no one moves.

We get a criss cross to set up a double clothesline to put both guys down and the place is eating this up. As I said, this changed wrestling because we now have a Wrestlemania main event, instead of the potential Hogan vs. Zeus or Hogan vs. Perfect. Perfect is great, but it wouldn’t have worked as the main event in front of 67,000 people. Anyway Barbarian comes in at #27 and doesn’t do much so Rick Rude comes in like twenty second early at #28. I’ve always wondered if that was intentional to prevent more of just Hogan vs. Warrior.

The heels double team Hogan to put him down but Warrior saves. They beat up Warrior a bit until Hogan Hulks Up and goes to the corner, eliminating Warrior in the process. Hercules is #29, which is pretty awesome luck as he got #28 the year before. Hogan tries to put Barbarian out but gets poked in the eye. Perfect is #30, giving us a final five of Hogan, Rude, Barbarian, Hercules and Perfect.

Hercules backdrops Barbarian out to get us down to four and we pair off with Herc vs. Rude and Perfect vs. Hogan. Rude backdrops the power dude out and we’re down to a handicap match. I think you can see how this is going to end. A quick double team ends with Perfect getting punched to the apron by Rude. Perfect low bridges Rude out and we’re down to two. Hennig pounds away and hits the PerfectPlex but it’s time for more Hulking Up. Slingshot into the post, clothesline, Hogan wins.

Rating: A-. THIS IS MORE LIKE IT! They totally got the formula down here and had a white hot crowd to do it in front of. The first twenty minutes or so here are just about perfect with a ton of talented guys working HARD. The next big drags just slightly but certainly aren’t bad, and then things went through the roof with Hogan vs. Warrior and the ending. Perfect was supposed to win here, but Hogan vetoed it and got the win himself. The more I think about that the less I dislike it because after the first two matches, you almost had to have a main eventer win this. Either way, great stuff here and one of the best Rumbles ever.

Overall Rating: B-. This is one of those tricky shows to rate as you have four pretty weak matches to start things off, but the Rumble is great and is longer than all four other matches combined. The Rumble is all that mattered here anyway and we got a great one to really establish a standard for the match for years to come. Also Wrestlemania is shaping up really well, so I don’t have many complaints here at all. Good stuff.

Ratings Comparison

Bushwhackers vs. Fabulous Rougeaus

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Brutus Beefcake vs. The Genius

Original: C+

Redo: D

Ronnie Garvin vs. Greg Valentine

Original: F (Biased). B- (Unbiase).

Redo: C+

Jim Duggan vs. Big Boss Man

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Royal Rumble

Original: A-

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Dang the weight of the Rumble has gone way up in the last few years.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/09/royal-rumble-count-up-1990/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1989
Date: January 15, 1989
Location: The Summit, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This is the first PPV version of the show and things have changed a lot. Tonight, everyone is in the match and they’re focusing more on the idea of every man being for himself. The match wouldn’t be worth anything for a few more years but things should be a little bit stronger tonight as they have a better idea what they’re doing. Let’s get to it.

We start off with a listing of presumably everyone in the Rumble tonight. If not then it’s at least most of them.

Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation

2/3 falls here. Anvil vs. Bravo gets things going and they collide a few times with no one going anywhere. Both guys miss elbows and it’s off to Duggan for a BIG reaction. Ray Rougeau comes in and is immediately slammed down and hit by a knee drop. Hart comes in to a small but audible reaction and gets two each off a small package and a sunset flip. Jacques comes in and things break down a bit with all three heels being caught in one corner where Anvil drives shoulders into them, crushing Ray against the corner under two other guys.

Ray FINALLY gets something in by low bridging Bret to send him to the floor. At the end of the day, when you need someone to sell something you call on Bret. Dino’s side suplex puts Bret down and The Rougeau Bomb gets the first fall. Bret and Ray start things off in the second fall with Hart in big trouble. Jacques comes in and sends Bret into the corner for the traditional chest first bump in the corner which gives Dino two.

Bravo puts on a bear hug for a bit before it’s back to Jacques. A sunset flip gives Bret a quick breather but he’s immediately put in a camel clutch. Anvil makes the save but as he’s being put back in the corner, Ray comes in and puts the same hold back on. That’s good stuff there. The heels take turns working over Bret until Jacques puts on a Boston Crab. Gorilla wants Duggan or Neidhart to come in and break the hold up, because you’ve got five seconds. I love the hypocrisy you would get from him at times.

Bret breaks the hold and tags in Anvil but the referee didn’t see it. That’s such a basic spot but you don’t see it much anymore. Ray puts on an abdominal stretch before it’s off to Jacques for the exact same hold. Bret FINALLY hits an atomic drop to break up the momentum and there’s the white hot tag to Duggan. Anvil hits a slingshot shoulder on Ray and a Duggan elbow drop ties the match up at a fall apiece.

Duggan pounds on Ray to start before going to the wrong corner to try to beat up both guys. Bravo hammers away a bit but rams Duggan’s head into the buckle for no effect at all. Duggan gets punched over into the corner and there’s the tag to Hart. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Bravo with the board to give Hart the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but Duggan’s reactions are amazing. The guy was probably the third most over guy in the company at this point, which is covering a lot of ground given how over some of the guys were in 1989. This was fine for an opener but the ending was never quite in doubt, which is ok.

We get a clip of some people pulling their numbers earlier. DiBiase isn’t thrilled at all and immediately goes to find Slick to work out a deal of some kind. These segments need to come back, if nothing else to try to make us believe the numbers are random. The Bushwhackers are happy with their numbers but they trade anyway. Honky is mad about his number. Bad News says his is good news. Demolition seems annoyed. Jake….you can’t tell emotion from him anyway. The Rockers don’t seem to hate theirs.

It’s time for the Super Posedown, which is exactly that: Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude posing against each other to further their feud. Warrior is IC Champion here and man alive if this happened on a PPV today the fans would likely riot. Well not riot but boo heavily at least. Heenan actually sucks up to the fans because it’s decided by fan vote. Again, the ending here isn’t exactly in doubt. This goes on WAY too long, as it’s just posing and people booing/cheering depending on who is posing. Rude finally attacks Warrior with a bar and bails. Warrior chases after him and that’s it. This somehow took nearly fifteen minutes.

Womens’ Title: Judy Martin vs. Rockin Robin

Robin is defending and is Jake Roberts’ real life half sister. Sherri is in the ring and wants the title shot at the winner of this. Martin misses a charge and Sherri sits in on commentary. They pound on each other and it’s clear that they’re not incredibly skilled in the ring. Martin slams her down and blocks a sunset flip with a punch to the head. Robin puts on a Boston Crab as this is going nowhere.

Martin blocks an O’Connor Roll as Sherri complains about not getting a rematch yet. Gorilla talks about the process you have to go through to get a rematch, which is a nice sounding idea when you think about all the automatic title rematches you get today. Imagine that: EARNING a title match. Something resembling a DDT gets two on Martin but Robin misses an elbow drop. Martin misses one also but a backslide gets two for Judy. Robin kicks her in the face for two and gets the same off a small package. Sherri: “Come on somebody win.” Robin goes to the middle rope, fakes Martin out, and cross bodies her to retain.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but the ending wasn’t bad. The Women’s Title would be retired about 13 months later and wouldn’t be restored until about 1993. At the end of the day, no one cares about womens wrestling other than for how small their outfits are. Robin and Martin aren’t exactly eye candy either, so this didn’t do much for anyone. At least it was short though.

Slick says the Twin Towers (Boss Man and Akeem) are probably winners of the Rumble but denies knowing anything about shenanigans with DiBiase. Sean Mooney has footage (the original Vickie Guerrer) of Slick and DiBiase together and suddenly Slick realizes he misunderstood Mooney the first time. He has no comment though.

Rude runs his mouth a bit about beating Warrior. This must be intermission.

Yep, it’s intermission as we get promos from a few managers, saying their guys are going to win. Nothing to see here but we hear from Fuji (representing the Powers of Pain), Liz (Mega Powers) and Jimmy Hart (Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine). Like I said, nothing to see here.

Jesse is sitting on the throne that will go to either Haku or Race. He thinks he might just run for King because the chair is comfortable.

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Race was King but got hurt and the crown went to Haku. This is his chance to get it back in a one time only return to the ring. Harley shoves over Haku’s throne to start and the brawl is on. You know Race is going to be the brawler in this. Back in and Race pounds away before suplexing Haku down for two. Heenan manages both guys here but Race is kind of the face by default.

They head to the floor again with Race being sent into the post and chopped a few times. Haku sends him back to the floor after a few seconds in the ring as we stall for a few moments. More chops have Race in trouble as Jesse talks about Hogan injuring Race, which is only kind of true. Race no sells a headbutt and gets two off a piledriver. They collide again and Race falls to the floor as Heenan plays both sides, saying he’s for both guys when the other is out of earshot.

Back in and Race punches some more before getting two off a suplex. Haku gets sent to the floor again as it’s pretty clear there’s not much to this match. Race tries to piledrive Haku on the floor but gets backdropped as is the usual. A second attempt at a piledriver works but not incredibly well. Back in and a clothesline puts Haku down for two but Haku comes back and misses a top rope headbutt. Race misses a headbutt of his own and charges into the superkick from Haku (looked GREAT) for the pin to keep the crown in Tonga or wherever he’s from.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible and the ending kick looked awesome, but other than that there wasn’t much to see here. Race was clearly old and banged up and he didn’t have a lot to work with in the form of Haku. The crown was mostly a minor title that was only somewhat official. Nothing to see here, but no one cares about anything but the Rumble tonight anyway.

Time for more Rumble promos, with Beefcake, Greg Valentine (both of whom say they just need their fists), the Powers of Pain (Fuji does the talking for them), Big John Studd (freshly back in the company), Mr. Perfect (pretty new at this point) and Savage (insane of course).

DiBiase is much happier about his number now.

Heenan says the Family (Brainbusters and Andre) is ready and Andre says he’ll thrown them out if he has to. Arn whispers to Tully when Andre isn’t looking because Arn Anderson is more awesome than you.

Hogan gives his usual promo with the focus on Boss Man and Akeem this time.

Royal Rumble

The entrants are every two minutes, allegedly. #1 is Ax and #2 is Smash, beginning a tradition of having partners fight at the beginning of these matches. They immediately pound on each other and amazingly enough, they actually sell the offense. It’s a bunch of clotheslines and punches, but the key to Demolition has always been how HARD they hit each other, which is what you get a lot of here. In at #3 is Andre, which gives us one heck of a handicap match.

Demolition immediately hits a double clothesline on Andre and start demolishing him to a BIG pop. Andre is way past being past his prime here but this is still cool to see. Here’s Mr. Perfect at #4 and he strolls down the aisle, which is pretty wise for him. Andre starts fighting Demolition off and for some reason this turns into a tag match. Andre easily throws out Smash, resulting in a 2-1 attack on Andre.

The Giant fights them off and Perfect sells a headbutt as only Mr. Perfect can. Here’s Ronnie Garvin at #5 and they get Andre tied up in the ropes. The Giant breaks free and beats up Ax while Garvin and Hennig fight a bit. Andre shifts over to beat up Perfect, giving us some more awesome overselling. Greg Valentine is in at #6 to make it 4-1 against Andre. AGAIN Andre is all like BRING IT ON and knocks them away, eliminating Garvin in the process.

Andre chokes Valentine in the corner while Ax and Perfect continue their rather uninteresting fight. Andre starts choking Ax and the look on his face is eerie. Jake Roberts is #7 and Andre immediately pounds him down. Nothing of note happens for two minutes so here’s Ron Bass at #8 as Jake gets eliminated by Andre. Shawn Michaels is in at #9, giving us Ax, Perfect, Andre, Bass, Valentine and Michaels. As I type that, Perfect knocks out Ax.

Perfect throws Shawn over the top rope but some skinning the cat brings him back in. Shawn dropkicks Perfect to the apron as we get into a sell-off. #10 is Butch who gets a big pop of his own. As Butch gets in, here’s Jake Roberts again with the snake to scare Andre out of the match. The fans look at something, presumably Jake and Andre in the aisle, as things settle down a lot. It’s Honky Tonk Man at #11 as things are in that annoying slow period of most Rumbles.

Tito Santana is in at #12 to finally balance the heel/face ratio out a bit. There’s almost nothing going on here other than the energy burst you get from the new guys coming in. Bass hits a good backdrop on Michaels as Santana barely survives an attack from Valentine. Bad News Brown is #13 and Butch and Santana (there’s a pairing for you) dump Honky. Butch gets beaten up and Shawn goes up top to jump on Bad News and Bass. Marty Jannetty is #14 and the Rockers double dropkick Bass out.

Tito kills Valentine with the forearm and world champion Randy Savage is #15. NOW the place wakes up as he hammers away on Bad News. Perfect and Savage go at it in a match that would have the purists drooling. Speaking of making purists drool, Arn Anderson is #16. Savage dumps Valentine as Shawn fights Arn. Savage….saves Anderson and eliminates Shawn? Now there’s one I didn’t expect. To recap, we’ve got Marty, Anderson, Butch, Brown, Savage, Santana and Perfect in there at the moment. That’s quite the lineup for the most part.

Tully Blanchard makes the lineup even stronger at #17. Just to be clear, that’s two tag teams getting back to back numbers. Gee, what are the odds? The Brainbusters double team Marty as we’re just waiting for Hogan at this point. And here he is at #18. There goes Perfect, giving him the new Iron Man record at just under 28:00. Off camera, Savage and the Busters put Santana out as Hulk beats up Brown. Hogan fights off all three heels as Savage beats on Butch. Nice partner, especially after Hogan saved Savage when he got to the ring.

Here’s Luke at #19 as things slow down again. Butch gets thrown out after a remarkable 18 minutes. Hogan hot shots Blanchard but has to beat up Luke instead of eliminating Tully. After a brief lull, here’s Koko B. Ware at #20. After more of that epic Hulk vs. Luke showdown, Arn goes up top and is immediately slammed down by Hogan. Dude, you’re best friends with RIC FLAIR. Why would you think that’s smart? Hogan dumps Koko and Luke but gets double teamed by the Busters.

Warlord is #20 and Hogan clotheslines both Busters out at the same time. Warlord poses on the apron, gets in, and is clotheslined out in 2 seconds flat, setting a record that would last 20 years. Hogan also dumps Bad News, but it takes out Savage in the process which adds even more fuel to the Mega Powers Exploding in less than a month. Liz comes in to play peacemaker and the Powers shake hands.

Now we get the big showdown of the match as Big Boss Man is #21 and gets to face Hogan one on one. This is when Boss Man weighed like 400lbs and was just freaking fat. Hulk slams Boss Man down and pounds away in the corner but falls victim to a splash. A piledriver puts Hulk down and Boss Man stands tall. Gorilla says Hogan has been out there for half an hour (it’s been about 8 or 9 minutes) and Jesse is hilarious in freaking out.

To give us the third team back to back in this Rumble, #22 is Akeem. Hogan rams them together and slams Akeem but the numbers catch up with Hogan. After a brief comeback, a double splash crushes Hogan and he’s easily tossed. Hogan, ever the jerk, pulls Boss Man out and beats on him, which is apparently an elimination. Beefcake is #23, which means we just missed what could have been a good house show tag match.

Hogan and Boss Man brawl to the back as we get to the pretty dull third act of the Rumble. Red Rooster is #24 and helps double team Akeem a bit. They try to dump Akeem but Barbarian comes in at #25 and breaks it up. Gorilla: “That was kind of stupid.” Taylor and Akeem pair off, as do Barbarian and Beefcake and the heels take over. Akeem crushes the Rooster (Terry Taylor in case you’re some young kid) and here’s Big John Studd at #27.

Nothing of note happens there so here’s Hercules at #28. Again nothing happens so Rick Martel is #29. He goes right for Akeem but Studd shoves him away because Akeem is his big piece of chicken tonight. DiBiase is of course #30, giving us DiBiase, Akeem, Hercules, Beefcake, Studd, Barbarian, Rooster and Martel. Jesse and Gorilla have a debate about what a manager is as DiBiase throws out the Rooster to get us down to seven.

DiBiase and Barbarian team up to put out Hercules and Beefcake, leaving us with five. This last part isn’t quite death for the match but it’s certainly a bad sickness. Martel puts out the Barbarian to give us a final four. Akeem misses a splash on Martel in the corner and Rick fires off some dropkicks to no avail.

A cross body is caught and Akeem dumps Martel to get us down to Studd, Akeem and DiBiase. Akeem pounds on Studd as DiBiase gives instructions. Studd pulls Ted in front of a splash and dumps Akeem to get us down to two. DiBiase offers money but Studd shakes a finger at him. Studd actually fires off some suplexes to the shock of Monsoon. The elimination is academic and Studd wins.

Rating: C-. The last third REALLY hurts this. It’s not that it’s bad but after Hogan leaves you could almost hear a pin fall. Ha I made a wrestling joke. Also, John Studd? Really? They’ve got all those guys in there and they pick Studd to win? After Wrestlemania the guy was pretty much gone and I don’t think there was ever a clear reason for Studd winning given, other than they thought he was going to be a big deal. It’s just an odd pick and one that hindsight doesn’t look kindly on. Anyway not a terrible match but the booking hurts it.

Savage reassures himself that he’s still great. You can hear the paranoia and see the heel turn coming if you look hard enough.

Jesse and Gorilla wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D+. I can’t say this was a bad show because nothing on here is truly terrible, but it’s certainly not good either. This is very characteristic of the late 80s as other than Hogan and Savage, the stories were very limited at best. They were trying though and that’s something you can’t fake. Not a terrible show, but it’s nothing more than a moment \for the most part.

Ratings Comparison

Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation vs. Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus

Original: C+

Redo: C

Rockin’ Robin vs. Judy Martin

Original: C-

Redo: D

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Original: C

Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

About the same again. That’s interesting compared to what happened with the Survivor Series Redos.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/08/royal-rumble-count-up-1989/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6