Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s the Gulf War show, as Hulk Hogan is fighting to get the WWF Title back from former American hero turned Iraqi sympathizer Sgt. Slaughter. If that sounds like one of the worst ideas for a Wrestlemania main event ever, you have quite the memory for these things. Other than that we have Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior in a match that actually belongs in a big spot at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about the stars and stripes with only Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter being shown.

Willie Nelson sings America The Beautiful.

Jim Duggan joins commentary for the first match, while saying that Hulk Hogan going after Sgt. Slaughter is like the military going after Saddam Hussein.

The Rockers know they’re ready for Haku and the Barbarian, whether they are part of the Heenan Family or not.

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Haku and Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, are already in the ring in a move that could cut down on so much Wrestlemania time these days. Shawn and Haku start things off as the fans are already yelling about Heenan. Haku whips him into the corner a few times but a shoulder and some right hands get Shawn out of trouble. Marty comes in for the double elbow but Barbarian clotheslines both Rockers inside out.

Back up and a double superkick drops Barbarian and it’s time for pointers with the Brain (jot that down for a talk show idea). We settle back down to Marty sunset flipping Barbarian for two before working over the arm. Haku comes back in for a double headbutt and an assisted hot shot has Marty in even more trouble. The gorilla press plants Marty again and Barbarian even draws Shawn in so double choking can ensue.

A hard whip into the corner gives Barbarian two more and we hit the required bearhug (What took them so long?). Marty tries to fight back but gets caught in a heck of a powerslam to cut him off again. Barbarian misses the top rope headbutt though and there’s the tag to Shawn. House is quickly cleaned, including a middle rope crossbody to Barbarian. Everything breaks down and it’s a double clothesline to Barbarian. Marty missile Barbarian and Shawn adds a high crossbody for the pin at 10:33.

Rating: C+. The middle felt a little bit long but this was a perfectly fine power vs. speed tag match. The Rockers are one of the better speed teams from around this time and they were a great choice for an opener. Haku and Barbarian on the other hand were perfectly acceptable monsters, making this a rather nice way to get the crowd fired up. It would have been a heck of a house show match (and probably was more than once) and that worked well in this spot.

We get our celebrity interviews with Regis Philbin (scared of Earthquake), Marla Maples (future wife of Donald Trump and tonight’s guest timekeeper) and Alex Trebek (Jeopardy jokes abound). I love Jeopardy and Regis can be funny, but these are about as cringe as you can get.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Jimmy Hart is here with Bravo, who jumps Tornado at the bell and clotheslines him out to the floor in an early heap. Back in and Tornado slugs away but can’t get the Claw. Bravo knocks him down again and drops an elbow for two, setting up the side slam. The delayed cover gets two and there’s a middle rope elbow to the back of Tornado’s head. Bravo goes up but dives into the Claw, setting up the Tornado Punch for the pin at 3:11.

Rating: D. This is the match that I cite for why I don’t redo every Wrestlemania (or any show) very often. There are only so many ways you can talk about a nothing match like this with no build and almost no time. Tornado was past his expiration date and Bravo would be gone, save for mostly house shows, after this, so what were they supposed to do here?

Slick and the Warlord are ready to beat British Bulldog. Sweet goodness I was scared of Warlord’s half mask back then and it’s still an awesome look to this day.

Bulldog says he can powerslam Warlord.

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Slick is here with Warlord but Bulldog has his mascot Winston (he’s no Matilda). This is power vs. power so Warlord starts with the clubbing forearm to the back. Bulldog runs him over with some shoulders and Warlord is already on the floor for a breather. Back in and Warlord counters the crucifix into something like a Samoan drop as things slow way back down. The bearhug goes on for a bit before Bulldog charges into a hot shot to cut the comeback right back off.

We hit the chinlock, with Heenan even complaining about how sloppy Warlord has it on. With that broken up, Bulldog dropkicks him into the corner and hammers away, setting up a crossbody for two. The piledriver is blocked so Bulldog settles for two off a sunset flip instead. Bulldog misses a charge though and Warlord gets most of the full nelson, minus the fingers being locked. The incomplete version is broken up and Bulldog hits the powerslam for the pin at 8:10.

Rating: C. This was another house show style match as Bulldog gets an impressive win, with that powerslam still looking great. Warlord is up there with the most generic monster villains you can get but he looked good enough that beating him still felt like something of a big deal. These two could have some nice power matches though and they made a basic story work well here.

The Nasty Boys, with Jimmy Hart, are ready to win the Tag Team Titles, even if it means beating the Hart Foundation. They destroy Gene handkerchief to warm up.

The Hart Foundation are ready for a fight but say the Nastys can’t crack, move or break the foundation.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Nastys, with Jimmy Hart (in a helmet), are challenging and Macaulay Culkin is in the audience, with Monsoon thankfully recognizing him. Sags punches away at Bret to start but Bret is back with a Thesz press and right hands (….hey). Bret cuts off a kick to the ribs and stomps Sags in the abdomen (or bread basket, whichever you prefer). Knobbs comes in to hammer on Neidhart in the corner, which of course is just fine with Neidhart.

The hard shoulders send Knobbs to the floor before it’s time to work on the arm back inside. It’s back to Sags, who gets taken down again by Neidhart, allowing Bret to hammer away as well. The Russian legsweep into the middle rope elbow connects but Bret has to cut off an interfering Knobbs. That’s enough for Sags to get in a cheap shot so the Nastys can actually take over for a change.

Bret is knocked to the floor for a breather, followed by a hard whip into the corner back inside as the pace stays slow. The reverse chinlock goes on for a good while before Knobbs comes in for one of his own. Sags grabs a third reverse chinlock, followed by Knobbs dropping elbows to the bad back.

Make that four reverse chinlocks until Bret finally avoids a charge in the corner. The tag to Neidhart isn’t seen but Knobbs runs into Sags by mistake, allowing Neidhart to come in legally. House is cleaned and a powerslam gets two on Knobbs. The Nastys collide again and the Hart Attack hits Knobbs. There’s no referee though, allowing Sags to get in a shot with Jimmy’s helmet to give Knobbs the pin and the titles at 12:00.

Rating: C. There were good sections, but how in the world can four straight reverse chinlocks be the best you have? Mixing it up at least a little big really shouldn’t be too much to ask but apparently that wasn’t going to happen here. This was a way to get some fresh blood in the tag division, which would be needed as the Harts were more or less done after this, with Bret moving into his singles career.

We recap Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts. Martel went to spray Jake’s snake bag with cologne (because reasons) but sprayed Jake in the eyes. Roberts was blinded as a result, though he managed to DDT Brother Love at one point. His eyes were messed up for months but now he’s back for a blindfold match.

Roberts says snakes have five senses but they always do it better in the dark.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

They’re both in hoods and if you ignore being able to see the eye hole when Jake puts his on, it makes for a good visual. Roberts goes smart early on by having the crowd help him find Martel. There’s no contact for the first minute until both of them stumble over the other a bit. Jake gets two off a rollup and then steps around Martel’s backdrop attempt (because that’s the kind of thing you do when you can’t see).

The pointing thing results in a collision and a pair of missed charges. Then to mix it up a bit, they miss each other again. Martel finally catches him with a slam but misses the elbow drop as Gorilla and Bobby suddenly can’t hear each other. Martel corners the referee in the corner as Jake is in another corner to start the pointing. With that not working, Jake starts clapping to get Martel to come over. This one actually works, but they crash into the ropes. Heenan: “Why doesn’t Martel lift the hood up and peak?” Gorilla: “That’s cheating!” Heenan: “SO WHAT???”

A headlock doesn’t work for Jake as Martel sends him outside. Heenan: “Excuse me. MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR!” Martel follows him out and pokes around with a chair, with the swing only hitting the post. Back in and Martel hits a backbreaker to set up the Boston crab. With that broken up in a hurry (so much for Martel’s finisher), Jake grabs the DDT for the pin at 8:31.

Rating: D. This match isn’t something that works well on second viewings, as there are so many instances where it is clear that they can see each other. Roberts getting the win is the feel good moment, but it took its sweet time getting there. Not as completely horrible as I remember it, but it doesn’t work very well if you’re paying attention.

Post match Jake busts up the Arrogance atomizer and puts Damien on Martel.

Marla Maples is in the locker room where the Nasty Boys, Jimmy Hart and the Mountie are celebrating the Tag Team Title win. Dino Bravo and Earthquake come in with more champagne and Marla is surrounded. That’s it for her, as this isn’t exactly a great celebrity cameo. What exactly was nasty about a big celebration anyway?

Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker of course. Snuka stares at Undertaker as we cut to Bearer looking….well weird to everyone else, normal for him. Undertaker sends him into the corner a few times before knocking Snuka outside in a heap. A suplex brings Snuka back in but he manages a few strikes for a breather. Snuka’s missed charge only hits ropes though and it’s another crash to the floor, followed by the Tombstone to make Undertaker 1-0 at Wrestlemania at 4:20.

Rating: D+. It’s always kind of interesting that one of the most important things in the company’s history started off as such a nothing match. This was little more than a squash as Snuka had absolutely nothing. The Tombstone alone was worth a look, though Undertaker was still figuring a lot of things out at this point.

We recap Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior in a career threatening match. Savage wanted a shot at Warrior’s WWF Title but got turned down (despite Sherri’s suggestive advances). As a result, Savage cheated like crazy to cost Warrior the title to Sgt. Slaughter. Warrior wants revenge, and their careers are on the line. This is FAR more interesting than the real main event as it has a more personal story and could go either way.

Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior

Before the match, Heenan spots Miss Elizabeth in the crowd, looking a bit distraught. Savage, with Queen Sherri, gets his big throne entrance and Warrior makes it weird by walking to the ring. They take their time to get going until Warrior powers him away. Savage bounces off of him and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Back in and Warrior chokes away before hitting an atomic drop, though things are still moving fairly slowly.

Sherri’s interference fails and Warrior punches Savage down again. Savage finally comes back with that running clothesline but Warrior pulls a high crossbody out of the air (that’s always impressive). Instead of slamming Savage down though, Warrior sits him down to start up the mind games. Said games cause Savage to throw in a chair but Warrior punches him down again. Warrior finally misses a charge into the corner though and Sherri stomps away on the floor.

Savage’s top rope ax handle has a bit more impact but Warrior shoves Sherri down anyway. A posting drops Warrior and Sherri, not taking this lying down, kicks away at Warrior. As Gorilla says this is officially the largest pay per view audience in the history of pay per view, Warrior gets two off a backslide for a breather. Warrior hits the clothesline and runs the ropes a bunch, only to miss the shoulder.

Savage grabs the chinlock for a bit before Warrior fights up. A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown and they’re both rather winded. Back up and Warrior actually grabs a small package but Sherri has the referee. Savage knees Warrior in the back to send him into the referee and now things are getting going. Sherri comes in off the top with her shoe but hits Savage by mistake, meaning it’s time for Warrior to go a-stalking.

A rollup (seemingly with trunks) gives Savage two and he sends Warrior hard into the corner. Savage clotheslines him in the back of the head and drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow….for two, just in case you didn’t know who was winning here.

Warrior Warriors Up and hits the shoulders into the gorilla press drop. The Warrior Splash connects for two and now Warrior is stunned. Warrior looks up, then looks at his hands, and starts walking up the aisle. Instead of taking the countout, Savage jumps him from behind and goes up top, only to miss his dive onto the barricade. Back in and Warrior’s flying shoulder sends Savage outside again. They get back in and do it again, as Savage’s bumps off the shoulder here are awesome. A third running shoulder sends Savage outside again and Warrior throws him back inside. Savage is DONE and Warrior gets the pin at 20:47.

Rating: A-. This felt like an epic showdown between two top stars and that is what it was supposed to be. You don’t get this kind of a match very often around the WWF and they made it work on every front. The ending scene of Savage being completely defeated made it look like the better man won, even with Savage and Sherri cheating every chance they could. Outstanding match here and it still more than holds up.

Post match Warrior leaves and Sherri berates Savage as he still can’t get up. She even kicks him over and over….until Elizabeth jumps the barricade and chases Sherri off (the ultra rare instance of her getting physical). Savage finally gets up and sees Elizabeth, leaving him very confused. Elizabeth stretches out her arms and Savage finally hugs her to a huge roar. Savage puts her on his shoulder and then holds the ropes open for her, because things have finally changed before them.

This is the moment that can still bring a bit of a tear to the eye of fans of my generation because it was YEARS in the making and the fans were begging Savage to take her back by the end. It’s Savage FINALLY being at peace and getting his happy ending after leaving it all in the ring. This is still one of the best things that WWE has ever done and it still gets to me, even if I’ve seen it dozens of times.

And now, a debate on instant replay in wrestling, with Vince McMahon moderating the discussion between New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner and NFL analyst Paul Maguire. Steinbrenner wants instant replay but if it takes more than a minute to get the call right, fire them. Vince: “What do you mean fire him? Like, from his job?” Maguire doesn’t like the idea and insults Steinbrenner over his comments. We get an instant replay, as looked at by the Bushwhackers, which results in the tape being ruined. Their ruling: the tape is inconclusive, therefore the play stands. This was bizarre to put it mildly, which might be why it isn’t on the Peacock version.

We run down what is left on the show as this feels like an intermission. Gorilla and Bobby talk about what has gone on so far, with Heenan saying if he was Savage, he would rather have some money than a skirt.

Regis Philbin interviews Undertaker and Paul Bearer, with Undertaker taking measurements for….reasons. Puns about being alive ensue.

Alex Trebek interviews Demolition, with Mr. Fuji, who yell a lot and scare Trebek a bit. Trebek tries to turn it into something Jeopardy-ish and the yelling gets has him throwing it back to Regis.

Regis tries to talk to Genichiro Tenryu and Koji Kitao about their match but can only use Japanese company names. They want to know where Kathy Lee (the co-host of his talk show) is and it doesn’t go well.

Jake Roberts and Damien scare Trebek off. Roberts tells Damien that he’ll have to settle for the home version of Jeopardy.

Those four segments? They were really, really bad.

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

This is Crush/Smash, with Mr. Fuji, in the very last try to push the team as meaning anything. Tenryu and Kitao are here as part of a partnership with Tenryu’s SWS promotion. Demolition jumps Kitao to start but Kitao knees Crush against the ropes. A distraction lets Smash get in a shot from behind though and Demolition takes over. Crush hits a top rope ax handle to the back as the fans aren’t exactly interested here. Kitao gets over for the tag off to Tenryu, who misses a top rope elbow. The Demolition Decapitator is loaded up but Kitao makes a save. Tenryu enziguris Smash and a powerbomb gives Tenryu the pin at 4:40.

Rating: D. Call it a style clash, call it Demolition being worthless at this point or call it the WWF not getting why this would be a bad idea, but this really did not work in any sense. The Ax/Smash version of Demolition was great, but the Crush/Smash version was Demolition in name only. This was more or less it for Demolition and based on this, that is the best thing for everyone involved.

Big Boss Man is tired of Bobby Heenan talking about his mama and has run through the Heenan Family. Now Mr. Perfect, and the Intercontinental Title, are all that’s left.

Bobby Heenan references the Rodney King beating and promises you’ll see something similar when Mr. Perfect beats up the Big Boss Man.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Boss Man is challenging after spending months beating up the rest of the Heenan Family (Rick Rude was originally going to be included but he left the company in the fall). Alfred Hayes is joining commentary to replace Heenan, who is in Perfect’s corner. Boss Man catches Perfect’s towel and cleans himself off with it, much to Perfect’s annoyance. Perfect gets knocked around as the beating is on, including Perfect charging into a boot in the corner.

There’s the big toss over the top and you know Perfect is going to take a huge bump off that one. Back in and Boss Man takes off his belt, only to have Perfect take him away and start hammering him down. Some shots to the back keep Boss Man in trouble and we hit the abdominal stretch. With that broken up, a good looking dropkick gives Perfect two and the neck snap makes it worse.

The PerfectPlex is countered into a small package for two but Perfect knocks him down again. Perfect goes up and dives onto a raised boot, setting up the ram into the buckle for another huge Perfect bump. Boss Man crotches him against the post but a Heenan distraction lets Perfect send him into the steps.

With the numbers advantage causing issues, Andre the Giant (oh boy) comes out to….well it’s not exactly even but it definitely changes things. As you might expect, Heenan panics so Perfect goes after Andre, who smacks him in the face with the Intercontinental Title. A VERY delayed cover gets two and here are Haku and Barbarian to jump Boss Man for the DQ at 10:46.

Rating: C. There was a lot going on here but I still don’t get why Boss Man didn’t win the title. That would seem to be the most obvious ending but instead it just goes nowhere, with Boss Man getting the “feel good” win. Perfect very easily could have wont he title back a month or so later, but at least we got one more Andre appearance where he looked somewhat mobile.

Gene Okerlund interviews……Donald Trump, who hopes to have Wrestlemania back in Atlantic City. Chuck Norris is here too, and thinks the wrestlers are great athletes, even name dropping Argentina Rocca of all people. Henry Winkler is happy the Ultimate Warrior won. Lou Ferrigno finds this really entertaining. I need a Christmas special where those four get together and save Santa Claus.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Jimmy Hart is here with Earthquake. This is my regular chance to ask what the heck the WWF was thinking by making Valentine a good guy around this time. Earthquake starts fast and hits an early powerslam for two as the dominance seems to be on. Valentine avoids a charge in the corner and slowly hammers away. A running elbow to the head actually puts Earthquake down on one knee and a middle rope version actually knocks him down. The Figure Four is blocked and Hart offers a distraction, allowing Earthquake to drop the elbow. The Earthquake finishes Valentine at 3:17.

Rating: D+. The match was fine enough and Valentine got in some offense, but there is only so much that you can get out of this situation. Earthquake cleaned Valentine out and beat him without much effort. I’m still not sure who saw Valentine as a good guy but to call it a flop would be too kind.

The Legion of Doom promise to make Power And Glory sour and gory. That’s a heck of a line.

Legion of Doom vs. Power And Glory

Slick is here with Power And Glory. The Doomsday Device finishes Roma at 58 seconds and the LOD wants the Tag Team Titles.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Virgil had been mistreated for years and FINALLY snapped at the Royal Rumble after a tag match with DiBiase. Roddy Piper has been supporting Virgil, despite Piper being in a horrible motorcycle accident that has left him barely able to walk at the moment.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Roddy Piper is here with Virgil, who punches DiBiase outside to start. With DiBiase back inside, Virgil punches him right back to the floor. Back in again and DiBiase gets clotheslined to the floor as the frustrations continue. A slower DiBiase gets back inside and this time a few shots slow Virgil down.

The beating is on, including a piledriver for two as commentary talks about how big of a show this has been. A suplex drops Virgil again and DiBiase heads outside to deck Piper. Back in and a powerslam gives DiBiase two but Piper uses his crutch to low bridge DiBiase to the floor. DiBiase goes after Piper but gets counted out at 7:42.

Rating: C-. As has been said, the problem with Virgil is that there just wasn’t anything there in the ring. His punches were his best weapon, as other than that, he was as generic as you could get. Getting the win over DiBiase was a nice moment, but they didn’t exactly make it feel like a big deal. It would have been too much to see Virgil pin him, but this wasn’t exactly thrilling.

Post match DiBiase goes after Piper’s knee again, with Sherri running in to help with the beating. Some crutch shots to the knee have Piper in trouble but Virgil gets up for the save. Piper is in agony but Virgil tells him to get up. Then Piper gets up with Virgil’s help.

Sean Mooney sends us to a recap of Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan. Slaughter has been playing by a new set of rules, including burning a Hulk Rules shirt. Adnan and Slaughter come in, with Adnan ranting a lot before we look at Slaughter jumping Hogan recently. Slaughter threatens to get himself disqualified or counted out in the main event. It doesn’t help that Slaughter getting disqualified or counted out was his best chance to retain the title.

Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Just in case the show hasn’t gone on long enough yet. Santana knocks him outside to start and hammers away back inside but Jimmy Hart slips Mountie the shock stick. One electrocution (and a joke about bad Mexican food from Heenan) and Santana is done at 1:21. This might be the all time definition of needless filler.

Hulk Hogan promises to use secret weapons to win the WWF Title. And no, a beating from Sgt. Slaughter isn’t slowing him down.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is defending, Marla Maples is the guest timekeeper, Alex Trebek is the guest ring announcer and Regis Philbin is on commentary. Hogan chases Adnan and Slaughter around to start before Slaughter even takes the belt off. We then pause for Slaughter to get ready before hitting the stall button for a bit longer. They lock up (accidentally knocking the referee down) and slaughter is sent into the corner.

Back up and Hogan runs him over with a shoulder, sending the champ outside. Slaughter grabs a chair but Hogan is waiting for him. Instead they head back inside, where Slaughter pokes him in the eye to take over. Heenan has to explain some of the backstory to Regis as Hogan slugs away to put Slaughter in the corner. Some rams into the buckle keep Slaughter in trouble as this isn’t exactly thrilling so far.

There’s a backdrop to Slaughter and a running knee sends him into the corner again. A catapult into the corner sets up the raining down right hands but Slaughter knocks a diving Hogan out of the air. Hogan shrugs that off and drops a bunch of elbows before going to the top (oh dear) where Adnan’s distraction lets Slaughter slam him down. Now a chair to the back can keep Hogan down on the floor, followed by the slow beating back inside.

Slaughter complains about the speed of a two count and the referee yells right back. The Boston crab goes on, all of four inches from the rope, so Hogan tries to power out anyway. With that not working, Hogan grabs the rope to escape, which feels pretty out of character. Some knees to the back set up a top rope knee to the back but for some reason Adnan distracts the referee, allowing Hogan to kick out.

A chair to the head busts Hogan open so Slaughter pounds away on the head and grabs the camel clutch. Hogan powers up again and escapes but Slaughter sends him into the corner. Slaughter puts the Iraqi flag onto Hogan and that’s enough for the Hulk Up. Said flag is destroyed and Hogan throws the punches, setting up the big boot and leg to get the title back at 20:22. Monsoon: “The war is now officially over.”

Rating: C+. The problem here is that it isn’t a bad match, but it might be the most obvious result in the history of….well perhaps human kind. Desert Storm was already over so this was just a formality, as Slaughter was a short form champion from the second he won the belt. Hogan did his normal match here, albeit a bit longer than usual, and the Hulk Up was short even by his standards. It’s completely fine, but with the war already over, it was nowhere near the feel good, special moment they were hoping it would be.

Hogan poses and waves the American flag to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show that has good pieces but DESPERATELY needed to be trimmed down. Would anyone have missed Earthquake vs. Valentine, Santana vs. Mountie or Von Erich vs. Bravo? The main event is on the lower end of Wrestlemania main events and the celebrity stuff is horrid. At the same time, Warrior vs. Savage is a classic and there is some other good stuff in there, but they really needed to cut this down by at least thirty minutes to get rid of some of the drag.

 

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B
2023 Redo: C+

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D-
2023 Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C-
2023 Redo: C

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F
2013 Redo: F
2015 Redo: F-
2023 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2015 Redo: A
2023 Redo: A-

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D-
2023 Redo: D

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: F+
2015 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D+
2023 Redo: C-

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: B-
2023 Redo: C-

I’ve really come down on this one over the years and other than maybe boosting up Savage vs. Warrior a bit more, I’m not sure how I had some of those earlier ratings.

Here is the original if you’re interested:

The 2013 Edition:

And the 2015 Edition:http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/16/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-vii-no-that-isnt-a-tear-in-my-eye/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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Royal Rumble 1992
Date: January 19, 1992
Location: Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s time to get back to one of the classics as this one comes up on the request list pretty regularly. Since this is going to be my fourth time looking at it, odds are this is going to be the last time I look at it for a very good while. You probably know the big attraction by heart at this point and that should be more than enough to carry the whole thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with Vince McMahon narrating a list of Royal Rumble entrants, which does have a certain charm as he is SO into it.

Commentary runs down most of the card. There are only five matches, so a full list wouldn’t be too much to ask.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

The Express (Kato/Tanaka) has Mr. Fuji with them. Owen and Kato start things off as Heenan ignores everything else to talk about Ric Flair in the Royal Rumble (fair enough in this case). Kato’s O’Connor roll is countered into an armbar, followed by a running hurricanrana to give Owen two. Neidhart comes in for an armbar of his own before it’s off to Tanaka for another showdown.

Tanaka bounces off of Neidhart as commentary talks about Neidhart’s questionable sanity. A spinebuster sets up Owen’s middle rope elbow as commentary finally starts talking about the match in front of them. That lasts all of ten seconds as we switch over to the Mountie winning the Intercontinental Title from a rather sick Bret Hart (not quite) at a recent house show. Heenan: “He had a 104 degree temperature. I’ve wrestled with an 113 degree temperature! It’s not that big of a deal!”

Neidhart hits a double clothesline to set up Owen’s high crossbody, followed by a spinwheel kick for two on Kato. Tanaka gets in a kick from the apron though and a Fuji cane shot lets the villains take over. Kato is back up with a jumping back elbow for two as Heenan tries to leave to consult with Flair before the Rumble. We get our first “fair to Flair” of the day as Owen does Breth’s chest first into the buckle bump. A superkick gives Tanaka two so he does it again, setting up a headbutt to the, ahem, lower abdomen (even commentary isn’t sure on that one).

Owen fights up and gets over for the tag but the referee doesn’t see it thanks to a well timed distraction (because the classics always work). Instead a belly to belly plants Tanaka for two, leaving them both down. Neidhart gets drawn in again, allowing a double clothesline for two on Owen. Another superkick drops Owen again but he gets back up with a double dropkick. The hot tag brings in Neidhart to clean house as everything breaks down. Owen hits a heck of a suicide dive on Kato, setting up the Rocket Launcher for the pin (Monsoon: “Sayonara baby!”) at 17:19.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that I miss in modern wrestling: take some talented people and put them in the ring together for a good while with little on the line. I get why it wouldn’t go over well today, but dang it is a nice flashback to a different era. The New Foundation wasn’t exactly as good as the Harts, but they were good enough to put in a nice effort like this one here.

We look at the Mountie defeating the sick Bret Hart to win the Intercontinental Title. Mountie kept the beatdown going after the match until Roddy Piper made the save. Another sneak attack from Mountie didn’t work, but now we have a title match.

Jimmy Hart is ECSTATIC over the Mountie winning the title. Mountie promises to beat Roddy Piper up, while taking his manhood AND his skirt.

Roddy Piper says we’re looking at one of the original Village People in the Mountie. First, Mountie wants to take Piper’s integrity, but Piper doesn’t have any! Then he’s coming for Piper’s manhood. Piper is here to wrestle, but he doesn’t know what Mountie is here to do. Tonight, Piper can win two titles and now he has to go win the first one.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Mountie is defending and has Jimmy Hart in his corner. Piper unloads to start and Mountie bails outside fast. A Hart distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, followed by some leapfrogs back inside. You can only do that to Piper for so long though as he sends Mountie into the buckle a few times. There’s a bulldog out of the corner as commentary bickers about how many rights Heenan has.

Hart’s distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, including some face first rams into the buckle. A sunset flip gives Piper two as Heenan again claims the 113 degree temperature, which he survived thanks to half of a children’s Aspirin. Back up and Piper sends him over the top, only to have Mountie skin the cat. Piper sends him into an interfering Hart though, grabs the sleeper, and wins the title at 5:20.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing, but was anyone buying the Mountie as having a chance against Piper? The whole thing was a way to transition the title off of Bret to set up the eventual showdown with Piper at Wrestlemania. Piper winning a title after all those years as a star is great to see though and that was the other major point. Bad match, but a good result.

Post match Hart tries to come in with Mountie’s shock stick, which Piper takes and uses on the Mountie instead. We do get a classic Fink AND NEEEEW moment, with Piper getting to hold the title for a great moment.

Hulk Hogan is ready to win the Royal Rumble, where he won’t have any friends because he wants the WWF Title back.

The Bushwhackers and Jamison (a disturbingly nerdy guy with a bad suit and a sock sitting out of his pocket) are ready for the Beverly Sisters’ final fling. They’ll beat up the Genius too.

Bushwhackers vs. Beverly Brothers

Jamison and the Genius are here too. We hit the stall button to start, with two and a half minutes passing before the Brothers jump Luke to start the physicality. Luke fights up and bites the back of Blake’s tights, setting up a double forearm to put the Brothers outside. We settle down to Beau vs. Butch as commentary talks about Jack Tunney actually doing something lately.

Beau gets in a cheap shot to take over as commentary talks about 20,000 fans here (17,000 official, so at least it’s not that far off). Everything breaks down again and the Bushwhackers clear the ring for the second time as we are somehow almost seven minutes into this. The Beverlies both try sneaking up from behind to even less avail but this time Butch goes outside to beat up Beau. A cheap shot to Luke finally gets us into a more traditional match, with the Beverlys taking turns with the elbows. Jamison: “Stop cheating!”

A backbreaker puts Luke down again and there’s a headbutt to the back for two. Heenan rants about his tax money going to Jamison as this match just keeps going. Luke gets beaten up again as genius slaps Jamison. One shot is finally enough for Luke to get over for the tag to Butch so house can be cleaned. The Battering Ram hits Blake and a running headbutt gets two on Beau. The referee has to get Luke out though and Blake hits a top rope ax handle to pin Butch at 14:56.

Rating: D-. Yowza this was a horrible match, with nothing good in the way of wrestling, a bunch of repetitive stalling and a lame ending. This was one of the worst pay per view matches I’ve ever seen from the WWF and the time would have been better used by airing an old pinball tournament. Awful in every sense.

Post match the Bushwhackers clean house and hold Genius back so Jamison can kick him in the shin. Good for him I’m sure.

The Legion Of Doom is ready for the Natural Disasters because they’ll fight anyone. Hawk wants the Disasters’ tongues hanging out like dead deers’.

Tag Team Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Legion Of Doom

The Disasters, with Jimmy Hart, are challenging. Hawk wastes no time in swinging away at Typhoon and everything breaks down quickly. Earthquake comes in and shrugs off Hawk’s dropkick, only to miss a (decent actually) dropkick attempt of his own. Gorilla: “He wouldn’t have hit Sky Low Low with that one!” Well no, as it would have been two feet above Low Low’s head. Think Monsoon.

It’s off to Animal for a double clothesline and knockdown, followed by Animal’s failed slam attempt to put him in trouble again. That lasts all of three seconds as Typhoon comes back in and gets his arm cranked, allowing the tag back to Hawk. A backbreaker cuts Hawk down and Typhoon adds a running crotch attack to the back. The required bearhug goes on before Earthquake steps on Hawk’s ribs.

Another bearhug goes on as Heenan is trying to pay someone to go to the back to get Flair information. This one is broken up just as quickly as the other, leaving Earthquake to miss a splash in the corner. Hawk manages a middle rope elbow to the head and it’s finally off to Animal to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and they fight to the floor, with only Typhoon beating the count back in for the win at 9:24.

Rating: D+. While it wasn’t good, this is just slightly better than the other tag match and that is what matters here. At the end of the day, the match was about setting up something in the future, even if that didn’t quite happen. The match wasn’t exactly fun to watch, as Earthquake and Typhoon are only going to be able to do so much in the ring. Throw in the LOD being a bit limited in their own right and this was about as good as it was going to get.

Post match the brawl is on and the Disasters are cleared out.

In the back, Jimmy Hart and the Disasters rant a lot.

Roddy Piper is very happy with his win and dedicates it to his son Colt.

After a clip of the famous Barber Shop split, Shawn Michaels doesn’t care that Marty Jannetty is out of the Rumble because Shawn is going to win it anyway.

Ric Flair has drawn #3 and doesn’t care, because he’s Ric Flair.

Randy Savage is ready to get back to the top of the mountain.

Sid Justice is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Repo Man is ready to repossess the WWF Title.

British Bulldog is ready to win another battle royal, just like he won another one last year at Royal Albert Hall in London.

Jake Roberts is ready to get what he needs and beat up Randy Savage at the same time. Trust him.

Mr. Perfect and Ric Flair are ready for the latter to prove that he is the REAL World’s Champion.

Paul Bearer is ready for 29 caskets as the Undertaker is WWF Champion again.

Hulk Hogan is ready for it to be every man for himself in the Royal Rumble so he can get the title back. Hogan was sounding rather whiny and a bit paranoid here.

Jack Tunney gives us a brief welcome and says may the best man win.

WWF Title: Royal Rumble

For the vacant title (after Hulk Hogan cheated to take it back from Undertaker) with two minute intervals. British Bulldog is in at #1 and Ted DiBiase is in at #2 as Heenan is already calculating odds on Flair’s ring time. Bulldog hammers away but charges into an elbow in the corner. DiBiase grabs some suplexes as Heenan suggests going through the ropes and hiding to kill time.

Bulldog gets thrown over the top but hangs on and runs back in to toss DiBiase, leaving Heenan upset. Ric Flair is in at #3 (Heenan: “NO!” Monsoon: “YES!”), sending Monsoon into a statement about how no one from entrants #1-5 has ever made it to the end. Heenan apologizes for not being able to be objective as Bulldog grabs the gorilla press. Flair gets in a poke to the eye for a breather as Jerry Sags is in at #4.

Bulldog gets double teamed as Heenan wants Flair to go rest in the corner. A double clothesline gets Bulldog out of trouble and there’s a dropkick to get rid of Sags (Heenan: “OH NO!”). Haku is in at #5 and goes after Flair (Heenan: “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HAKU??? HAVE YOU GONE NUTS???” You know, because HAKU is most well known for his calm, rational demeanor), who actually takes him down and drops a knee to the head. Bulldog gets rid of Flair and Shawn Michaels is in at #6.

A superkick drops Flair fast (not yet the big time finisher) and another….lands in the general vicinity of Bulldog’s head as Heenan wants a stiff drink. We also start the weird timing as Heenan says Flair has been in over ten minutes despite the match not even going for ten minutes yet. Tito Santana is in at #7 and has Flair upside down in the corner (Heenan: “PERFECT! GET OUT HERE!”).

Flair slips out and gives Santana a belly to back suplex, followed by a low blow to Bulldog (Heenan: “I’d do that to my grandmother if I had to!”). The Barbarian is in at #8 (Heenan: “When I managed him, he barely liked me!”) and everyone brawls around without much going on. The Texas Tornado is in at #9 and goes right after Flair as Heenan is sounding increasingly desperate. Things slow down even more (fair enough) as the Repo Man is in at #10, giving us Bulldog, Flair, Michaels, Santana Barbarian, Tornado and Repo Man.

Barbarian and Flair double team Tornado and it’s Greg Valentine (in his bizarre face run) at #11. Naturally he goes right for Flair as Heenan talks about how the Perfect Plan called for Flair to go no more than 30 minutes. Flair kicks Repo Man low and it’s Nikolai Volkoff (Heenan: “300 pound Lithuanian!”) in at #11. Valentine grabs the Figure Four on Flair (Heenan….well you can just imagine) as Volkoff is tossed out to clear some of the ring. The Big Boss Man is in at #12 to pick up the energy a bit.

There goes Valentine, with Repo Man and Bulldog following him. Tornado is out as well as Heenan is begging Flair to get away from Boss Man. Santana and Michaels are both out and it’s Hercules at #13. Flair chops at Barbarian (Heenan: “NO RIC!”) and gets gorilla pressed for his efforts. Hercules dumps Barbarian (saving Flair in the process) but gets tossed as well. Boss Man clotheslines Flair but misses a charge and gets low bridged out, leaving Flair alone in the ring.

It’s Roddy Piper in at #14 and Heenan is beside himself as Flair is in even bigger trouble. Piper beats him up and takes it to the floor to keep up the beating. Back in and it’s an airplane spin into the sleeper to knock Flair mostly out. Jake Roberts is in at #15 to sit in the corner as the sleeper continues. Roberts goes after Piper (Heenan: “Thank you Jake!”) before hitting the short arm clothesline (Heenan: “You no good….”). Piper makes the save (Heenan: “It’s not a skirt! It’s a kilt!”) and Flair puts the Figure Four on Roberts. That’s broken up by Piper (Heenan: “You no good skirt wearing…..”) and it’s Jim Duggan in at #16.

Even Monsoon is praising Flair’s conditioning at this point as Heenan thinks Hulk Hogan is behind the order of entrants. Duggan punches Flair into the corner as Roberts does the same to Piper. It’s IRS in at #17 and it’s a double noggin knocker from Duggan to Roberts/Flair, giving us a Flair Flop. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 and he still looks weird in those long tights. Heenan: “He’s wasting time!” Monsoon: “He is not!” Heenan: “I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.”

Piper chops on Flair in the corner but hands him off to Roberts, who can’t get rid of him. The Undertaker is in at #20 and Heenan is….oddly kind of calm about it. That gives us Flair, Piper, Roberts, Duggan, IRS, Snuka and Undertaker, with Snuka being tossed almost immediately. Undertaker grabs Flair by the throat, with Heenan declaring that everything is over. Duggan saves Flair and gets kicked low by Undertaker (that’s a weird visual) as Randy Savage is in at #21, meaning Roberts bails straight to the floor (not out).

Undertaker jumps Savage from behind so Piper comes back in, only to get kneed over the top by Savage. Hold on though as Savage dives over the top to go after Roberts again….but Undertaker throws Savage back inside, apparently because he wasn’t THROWN over the top. Ignore that this goes against previously established rules, but since when has that mattered? Flair stomps on Savage in the corner and hits Undertaker low, the latter of which doesn’t seem to matter.

Berzerker is in at #22 and hammers on various people as Heenan panics at Flair going after Savage. Undertaker and Piper choke Flair until Virgil is in at #23. Flair survives an Undertaker elimination attempt and it’s Colonel Mustafa in at #24. Monsoon refers to Flair as “Martel” twice, even as Duggan punches Flair in the face. Piper beats on Flair in the corner and it’s Rick Martel in at #25.

Heenan thinks some of the bigger names have gotten some great luck in the drawing, again forgetting an announcement on Superstars that some of the bigger names were guaranteed later numbers. Mustafa is out and everyone brawls….until Hulk Hogan is in at #26 (Heenan: “OH MY GOD NO!”). The brawl is on again as Heenan starts bargaining with God to let Heenan win. Hogan gets rid of Undertaker and Berzerker back to back with Virgil and Duggan going out at the same time.

Skinner is in at #27 as Heenan thinks Flair should be the Real World’s Champion no matter what. Sgt. Slaughter is in at #28 as Skinner is out. Hogan and Piper go at it, with Monsoon sounding almost surprised because they’re friends, despite having one of the most famous rivalries in wrestling history. Flair officially sets the all time record as Sid Justice is in at #29 to quite the reaction.

More brawling ensues as Warlord is in at #30, giving us a final grouping of Flair, Piper, IRS, Savage, Martel, Hogan, Slaughter, Sid and Warlord. Hogan slams Flair at the top and they both roll outside (not eliminated) to fight some more outside. Sid dumps Slaughter as Monsoon can’t believe that Flair is still here. Granted he also thinks Flair has been here for an hour when we’re still coming up on an hour into the match.

Piper pulls IRS out by the tie and Sid dumps Warlord to get us down to six. Sid gets rid of Martel and Piper, leaving us with Savage, Sid, Hogan and Flair, which makes me want to play Super Wrestlemania. There goes Savage as well, leaving Hogan to punch Flair over the top. Hogan goes to dump him but Sid tosses Hogan instead. Ever the nice guy, Hogan grabs Sid’s arm because “you stole my belt”, allowing Flair to dump Sid (with Hogan’s help) for the win and the title at 1:02:02. Heenan: “YESx50!”

Rating: A. Yes it’s still great and it still works as well as probably any Rumble would for almost ten more years. Flair has a great performance in setting the record and never once seeming like he was laying around for any extended period of time. You also have a star studded lineup with all kinds of people feeling like dark horse candidates, meaning there was little down time. Then of course there’s Heenan, who has the call of a lifetime as you can picture him losing his mind at everything falling apart. Monsoon laughing at Heenan when Flair comes out early but then respecting Flair by the end is great too, making this a masterpiece.

Post match Hogan and Sid bicker a lot, setting up Wrestlemania. I remember watching this at around four years old and wondering why Hogan was upset when he was eliminated without breaking any rules. There was no reason for him to be angry over this and he was just whining.

In the back, Jack Tunney presents Ric Flair with the title, allowing Flair to give the incredible “with a tear in my eye” speech, talking about how this is the title that matters the most in the world. Flair, Perfect and Heenan all WOO in celebration. Perfect: “We’re not the kind of guys to say we told you so but….we told you so!” After Flair cracks up at that one (and Gene gets in the infamous “PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT!”), Gene signs off and sends us to the highlight package to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a weird show as the main event is the ONLY thing that matters (though the Piper title win was a very nice moment) and everything else is pretty minor. The problem is one of those two matches is horrible and another is pretty bad, bringing the overall rating down a bit. That being said, this is the definition of a one match show and there is little reason to watch anything but the Intercontinental Title match and the main event. One is a feel good moment and the other is an all time classic, so we’ll call this quite the success.

WWF, 2022, 1992, Redo, Royal Rumble, New Foundation, Orient Express, Mountie, Roddy Piper, Jimmy Hart, Hulk Hogan, Bushwhackers, Beverly Brothers, Jamison, The Genius, Natural Disasters, Legion Of Doom, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Sid Justice, Randy Savage, Undertaker

Ratings Comparison

New Foundation vs. Orient Express

Original: C+
2013 Redo: B-
2018 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C+

The Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

Original: B
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

Original: F+
2013 Redo: T (The Worst Match In Royal Rumble History)
2018 Redo: F
2023 Redo: D-

Legion of Doom vs. Natural Disasters

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B
2023 Redo: A-

I’m pretty much done with this show after this one, though it’s still rather great.

Crunch Classic
Host: Roddy Piper
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes

You ever just feel the need for some Coliseum Video goodness? Well this is from 1992 so the goodness might not be at its highest level but it’s a tape I haven’t looked at before. I’m not sure how accurate the term “classic” is going to be here but the WWF does have a reputation for false advertising. Let’s get to it.

Roddy Piper welcomes us to the show and talks about some of his crunch classic moments, including beating up Mr. T., Jimmy Snuka and Cyndi Lauper, but he never had a belt to put around his waist. Then he met the Mountie.

From the 1992 Royal Rumble.

Intercontinental Title: The Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

Piper is challenging and knocks Mountie, with Jimmy Hart, outside in a hurry. A cheap shot on the floor slows Piper down but he sends Mountie into the corner a few times back inside. Piper hits a bulldog for two but misses a dropkick allowing Mountie to send him into the buckle as well.

Commentary talks about how Bret Hart had a 103 degree fever when he lost the title to the Mountie, with Heenan talking about how he wrestled with 113 degree fever. All it took was a children’s Bayer. Heenan: “The orange flavored ones!” Piper atomic drops him over the top but Mountie skins the cat. That’s fine with Piper, who sends him into an invading Hart and grabs the sleeper for the win and the title at 5:21.

Rating: C+. I’ve seen this match more times than I can remember and the only thing that matters is Piper finally getting his moment. No one bought Mountie as a serious champion so this was about as good of an effort as he was going to put up here. Piper was LONG overdue to win something and it’s as much of a feel good moment as you’re going to get.

Post match Hart tries to come in with the shock stick but Piper takes it away and shocks Mountie instead. With the villains dispatched, we get the big AND NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW title call in one of Fink’s best ever announcements.

From Dayton, Ohio, October 22, 1991.

Virgil/Big Boss Man vs. Money Inc.

It’s not Money Inc., yet but close enough. They also have Sensational Sherri with them, which is kind of a weird combination. Virgil is also Million Dollar Champion, just to make DiBiase all the more annoyed. Thankfully Mooney dubs them Money Inc. just after the bell so I can save time on an edit. Boss Man chases IRS into the corner to start before IRS charges into a raised boot.

Virgil comes in to sunset flip DiBiase for two and there’s an atomic drop to send him outside. Back in and Virgil charges into a boot in the corner so IRS can add the flying shoulder. DiBiase’s suplex gets two and IRS’s legdrop gets the same. Virgil finally gets in a shot of his own and the big (not hot, but big) tag brings in Boss Man to clean house. With nothing else working, Sherri takes her shoe off but hits IRS by mistake, allowing Virgil to get the rollup pin at 7:03.

Rating: C. They were trying really hard with Virgil at this point and the win here was another step, but it just wasn’t going to go anywhere outside of the DiBiase feud. Other than that, this was a pretty nothing match, but the fans got to cheer at the end as they should have. For a dark match from a TV taping, I’ve seen much worse.

Post match yelling ensues but DiBiase calms IRS down with cash.

Here’s a special feature on 24 Hours With Jimmy Hart. We catch up with him arriving at a hotel (sans limo of course) over what appears to be Wrestlemania VIII weekend. Hart’s wrestlers are checked in but his room won’t be ready for about three hours. He can stay in a room in the basement though, meaning he has an office. Mountie comes in and says Jimmy was supposed to take care of his stick tonight. Later, Money Inc. is here to make sure everything is planned, including an appearance on the Arsenio Hall Show.

Hart finally falls asleep (reading WWF Magazine of course) when a phone call tells him about various problems with his wrestlers. Later, the Nasty Boys aren’t ready to go to the ring so Hart runs off on his own. Hart is FINALLY done….and his room key doesn’t work, leading to a nervous breakdown. This was funny enough, but Hart can make anything worth a laugh.

From Austin, Texas, December 4, 1991.

New Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

That would be Owen Hart/Jim Neidhart and Jimmy Hart is with the Nastys. Neidhart and Knobbs start things off with the former firing off the big forearms in the corner. Everything breaks down and Neidhart whips Owen through the ropes for a big dive. Owen backflips in from the top to show off a bit and the fans approve. Back in and the Nastys go with the double teaming to take over for all of five seconds before Owen armdrags his way to freedom.

Neidhart comes back in to stay on the arm but it’s right back to Owen, who gets slapped in the face. That’s enough for the Nastys to finally get him in the corner so the choking can begin. Sags grabs a chinlock until Owen fights up for a failed sunset flip attempt. Some elbows to the back keep Owen down and we hit the reverse chinlock. Owen fights up and brings Neidhart back in to clean house, including a shoulder to Knobbs. That doesn’t work for Sags, who throws the referee out for the DQ at 7:26.

Rating: D+ Owen was trying here but the New Foundation never quite clicked. At the same time, you know exactly what you’re going to get from the Nasty Boys so there wasn’t much to get excited about here. The ending does seem stupid but the Nastys were a bigger deal and given that this was being recorded, it makes sense to try and protect them a bit here.

Roddy Piper talks about beating up Jimmy Hart and Adrian Adonis at Wrestlemania III (Piper: “92,271 paid admission. And me. The Scotsman, I don’t may for nothing!”). It was one of the greatest nights of his life because the people were cheering for him.

From Wrestlemania III.

Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis

Hair vs. hair, Adonis has Jimmy Hart in his corner and this has Gorilla Monsoon and Lord Alfred Hayes on commentary to avoid Jesse Ventura issues. They slug it out to start with Piper pulling out a belt to whip away. Hart gets beaten up as well but the distraction lets Adonis take the belt and get in his own whips. Back up and Piper whips him over the corner to the floor (which Adonis can do despite weighing well over 300lbs here), setting up the very 1987 double noggin knocker.

Hart trips Piper though and Adonis gets to rake at the skin a bit. Adonis hammers away on the ropes so Piper says bring it on, earning himself a spray from the atomizer. The sleeper goes on (which is more like a smother) but Adonis lets him go at two arm drops. Cue Brutus Beefcake to wake Piper up and the comeback is on. Piper decks Hart and sleepers Adonis for the win at 6:55.

Rating: B-. This is a good example of a match that is carried by the crowd reactions. The fans were going NUTS for this stuff and it made for a special match as a result. They completely embraced Piper in this role after hating him for so many years and this whole thing was such a blast. Not a good match from a quality standpoint, but it was a good payoff to a red hot feud.

Post match Beefcake goes to cut Adonis’ hair but it’s rather wet so the shave only goes so well. Adonis wakes up and sees the hair cut in a well placed mirror, sending him into a rage until he falls to the floor.

And now, a fan request match. From Utica, New York, November 11, 1991.

British Bulldog vs. Undertaker

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker as commentary points out that Undertaker is being “more friendly” lately, though this was before he turned. Bulldog hammers away to start and knocks Undertaker over the top for the feet first landing. A ram into the steps rocks Undertaker again but he’s right back with the uppercuts. The smother to the face slows Bulldog down as Bearer says THE POWER OF THE URN COMPELS YOU. Bulldog fights up and manages a slightly delayed suplex, setting up the running powerslam but bearer offers a distraction. An urn shot gives Undertaker the pin at 7:09.

Rating: C. This is more of a historical curiosity than anything else but it is still kind of cool to see. The Bulldog was around the height of his singles career at this point but Undertaker was a force of a different kind. They had to turn him as he was getting such positive reactions and it’s almost weird to hear commentary have to backtrack a bit because of the taping schedule.

Post match Undertaker loads up the body bag but Bulldog fights up and clears the ring.

From Austin, Texas, December 4, 1991.

Texas Tornado vs. Rick Martel

Martel shows of his (rather impressive) physique to start before going with some knees to the ribs. They fight over a lockup until Martel rakes the eyes until Tornado finally throws him outside. Back in and Tornado works on the arm, including an armbar. Tornado misses a charge into the post though and Martel hits a middle rope ax handle to put him down. Martel dives into the claw but makes the rope, allowing him to spray Arrogance in Tornado’s face for the DQ at 5:59.

Rating: D+. Really? You can’t have Martel lose to the Claw in TEXAS? I get the idea of protecting some people but Rick Martel? In 1991? I don’t get this one, but on top of that it just wasn’t that great of a match. Martel is a good hand and did his thing here, but Tornado did little more than the arm cranking and the Claw.

Roddy Piper doesn’t like snakes, so let’s go to Jake Roberts talking about how Snakes Make Fun Pets. Jake talks about how snakes will feed on themselves and how they have been around since the time of Adam and Eve. But now, a senile old man named Jack Tunney is barring him from bringing a snake to the ring.

Jake likes snakes because they’re survivors, and we see a clip of a cobra bit Randy Savage’s arm (that TERRIFIED me as a kid). The other nice thing about snakes is how many different kinds there really are. We see Jake holding various snakes and seemingly threatening us with them before promising the snakes will be back. This was pretty much just an extended Jake promo, which isn’t a bad thing. What might be a bad thing: including a long Jake promo when he was gone from the company by the time this was released.

From Cornwall, Ontario, Canada, September 10, 1991.

Skinner vs. Jim Neidhart

After standing there for about forty seconds, Skinner gets out and runs up the aisle before coming back with…something. Then it disappears and we continue the stalling before they lock up about two minutes in. Skinner’s running shoulder doesn’t hurt Neidhart but a hiptoss does take him down.

Skinner does it again and then grabs a headlock, only to be knocked out to the floor. Back in and an atomic drop puts Skinner right back outside, allowing Neidhart to grab the can of tobacco reside. Skinner is so annoyed that he goes up the aisle for a bit, only to have Neidhart come back with the headlock inside again.

With the match still in first gear, Skinner gets in a shot to the throat to escape and starts choking. That doesn’t last long so Skinner switches it up by hitting him in the ribs and then the throat. Neidhart fights back up and they go to the floor for the double countout at 13:15. Actually hang on as it’s a time limit draw, because that makes such a difference here.

Rating: D-. Who in the world thought this was a good idea? It’s bad enough that the match took place, but then they recorded it on top of that? What were they expecting this to be? They were stalling to get through a bunch of the time and then it got even worse. Awful match here and they seemed perfectly fine with that being the case.

Post match Neidhart wants to keep it going but Skinner leaves. Smart man.

From Lubbock, Texas, January 27, 1992.

Natural Disasters vs. Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter

The Natural Disasters have Jimmy Hart with them. Duggan and Typhoon start things off, with Duggan firing off some clotheslines to finally put him down. It’s off to Slaughter for some forearms in the corner as Typhoon stays in trouble. Back up and Typhoon hands it off to Earthquake, who quickly pounds Duggan down.

Earthquake misses a charge in the corner but he’s fine enough to knee Duggan in the back. It’s back to Typhoon for the bearhug, followed by another one from Earthquake. Duggan fights out and hands it back over to Slaughter as everything breaks down. Earthquake tries to bring in the megaphone so Duggan grabs the 2×4, which earns him the DQ to give the Disasters the win at 9:26.

Rating: D+. Another dull match that didn’t go anywhere, making it a perfectly uninteresting way to end a tape mostly full of such matches. Duggan and Slaughter were a fine enough patriotic team and there was a discussion of this match being the Tag Team Title match at Wrestlemania VIII but obviously that didn’t happen, which might be for the best if this is what we were going to get.

Roddy wraps us up.

Overall Rating: D. This was AWFUL and one of the worst Coliseum Videos I can remember. The biggest problem here was a lack of energy, as it didn’t feel like anyone was really trying. The biggest highlight here was the Piper vs. Adonis match from Wrestlemania, which should tell you everything you need to know about the tape. Dreadful stuff here and I have no idea what about this was supposed to be a classic.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 27, 1986
Location: Wicomico Youth & Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re back with more of what WWE has released of the show and that means we could be in for something fun. The wrestling isn’t exactly high quality on here but it’s one of those shows that is so easy to watch and it makes for some entertaining stuff. There isn’t anything big on the schedule for the time being but Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff is still going very strong. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Gorilla and Bobby (who doesn’t speak) welcome us to the show.

Opening sequence.

Commentary runs down everyone on the show this week.

Koko B. Ware vs. The Gladiator

Ware gets an insert promo before the match, introducing us to his new parrot Frankie. Gladiator’s headlock doesn’t last long and he misses a shoulder to make it worse. Back in and we get a criss cross until Koko stops to do the Bird. A hiptoss puts puts Gladiator down and it’s time to work on the wristlock. Ware wins a slugout, with Heenan not liking all of the punching. Gladiator walks into a neckbreaker and the Ghostbuster (brainbuster) finishes him off at 2:52. This was not the best from Ware and things looked quite sloppy at times.

It’s time for Wrestler’s Rebuttal, featuring Slick, Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik talking about how they can’t stand people around here.

Paul Orndorff vs. Lucius Brown

Orndorff comes out to Real American (there’s an angle that needs to be brought back) and has Bobby Heenan with him. As usual, the fans drive Orndorff crazy with the PAULA chants Brown starts fast but a leapfrog is countered into a hot shot. Orndorff sends him outside for a crash, followed by a clothesline back inside. The piledriver finishes Brown at 2:03. That landing must have messed with him pretty badly, as about a year later he would come back calling himself Virgil and working for Ted DiBiase.

Ricky Steamboat talks about getting pushed too far by Jake Roberts and wanting revenge. Steamboat came here to push himself and win a championship, which he might do down the line, but then he ran into someone like Roberts who wanted to do the same. Now Roberts did it with a DDT on the concrete floor, but next time it’s going to be Roberts going down.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Terry Gibbs

This is Honky Tonk’s in-ring debut and as he hammers away, we get an insert promo from Hulk Hogan talking about how great Honky Tonk Man really is. Gibbs gets in an elbow to the chest but Honky Tonk slams him off the top. There’s the backdrop and Honky Tonk’s straps come down, setting up another slam (he likes those). The top rope fist drop finishes Gibbs at 2:35.

Lanny Poffo mocks his own new haircut and talks about how many fans are buying the signed Frisbees. For now though, he has a poem about something important in the Special Olympics. It’s about how important it is for kids to be able to get back in the game and my goodness that was actually rather nice.

Butch Reed vs. Mike Kelly

Reed, with Slick, is billed as Mr. Natural (later THE Natural) in what might as well be his debut (he had wrestled the day before on Superstars). In another insert promo, Reed talks about how he’ll soon be the natural champion. Reed shoves Kelly around to start and knees him in the ribs to make it worse. A forearm to the face lets Reed pose a bit before pulling him up off a suplex. Reed finishes him with a gutbuster at 2:42. Thankfully Kelly’s gut wasn’t busted too badly, as he would go on to become Shane Douglas.

We go to the Snake Pit with special guests the Hart Foundation. Jimmy Hart says they are bad seeds before Jim Neidhart talks about how the snake eats a rat or a chicken. But could it perhaps eat a Killer Bee? The Harts think it might be hungry for a Rougeau or a Bulldog, with Jake talking about how you have to be hungry for what you want. They are the men that your mother always warned you about, the nasty boys. They said quite a bit here but what matters is they didn’t overstay their welcome like so many talk shows today.

We go to the Isle of Samoa, where the Wizard shouts about how Sika’s ancestors did various evil things year a thousand years ago. Sika comes up eating a fish and the Wizard wants a return to the days of cannibalism. So Sika is a fish? Oh and Sika is going to eat Hulk Hogan. So Sika is Hulk Hogan? And a fish? Then they go into the jungle, where Sika eats some plants. So Sika is….I give up. Then they go to a fire as Wizard keeps talking about how evil Sika can be and Sika eats something else. This went on for a long time and they got the point across with the first of the three segments.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff vs. British Bulldogs

Non-title and Slick/Freddie Blassie are here with Sheik and Volkoff. After the Russian national anthem, we’re ready to go with Sheik driving Bulldog up against the ropes. It’s off to Volkoff to choke Dynamite in the air (with one hand for some rather impressive power) and then send him into Sheik’s raised boot. Dynamite suplexes his way to freedom though and it’s Bulldog coming back in for the suplexes. Bulldog tries another suplex but Slick sweeps the leg so Sheik lands on top for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C. That’s quite a weird thing to see on one of these shows and it certainly came out of nowhere. The cheating protects the champs and likely sets up a series of house show title matches, but dang that is weird to see for 1986. At the same time, it’s kind of amazing how long Sheik and Volkoff were a team. They were together at Wrestlemania I and still together two years later at Wrestlemania III, which is a good while longer than I had realized.

Slick talks about buying half of Freddie Blassie’s contracts so he could be the first black manager. There are no wrestlers more talented than Iron Sheik, Nikolai Volkoff and Hercules Hernandez (not here). Volkoff talks about how much better things are now that Slick is here and Sheik calls Slick, and I quote, “a rare honest black man.”

The preview for next week and a highlight package take us out.

Overall Rating: C-. I know the wrestling isn’t very good and it doesn’t feel like anything of note happens around here, but sweet goodness it’s fun to get away from everything moving at a breakneck pace on modern shows. This is quick, to the point stuff and helps get the wrestlers over to make them seem more important. It’s such a fun show and I could go for a lot more of it, which will certainly be the case.

 

 

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WrestleFest 1992
Hosts: Gene Okerlund, Bobby Heenan
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes

I’ve done most every other show in this series so we might as well do the last one. This is a Coliseum Video without much of a particular theme and that means we could be going in all kinds of directions. We’re a bit past my favorite time but odds are there is going to be some Bret Hart and/or Shawn Michaels goodness to carry it through. Let’s get to it.

Dig that old Coliseum Video intro. It’s not the 80s version but I can always go for this one too.

Gene Okerlund is on the tennis court and we have a theme for the tape. Now of course he’s going to need a partner, so here is Bobby Heenan, complete with a sweatband. Gene offers a lesson but Heenan has a table tennis paddle. Heenan: “You play with a Chinese guy and he brings you egg rolls. It’s a heck of a game.” Heenan, in a sweater, complains about the heat but let’s go to our first match.

From New York City, New York, March 23, 1992.

Shawn Michaels vs. Virgil

Sherri is here with Michaels and Mooney calls Virgil (still with his broken nose) “one of the most popular Superstars in the World Wrestling Federation”. Hayes calls him one of the most improved wrestlers of the 90s, which has me wanting these two checked into a sanitarium. Shawn and Sherri take their time getting rid of the gear and after a minute plus, we’re finally ready to go. Michaels takes him into the corner and punches the nose guard in a moment of general stupidity.

We now pause for Sherri to kiss Shawn’s hand before a slap to Virgil’s face has Shawn bailing to the floor. Virgil isn’t having that and throws Shawn back in as we see Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan at ringside for the original commentary. Shawn punches out of a headlock but gets pulled right back into another one to keep him in trouble. Back up and a clothesline puts Virgil on the floor and Shawn gets a rather needed breather.

With Virgil back in, Shawn gets evil by lifting the nose guard for a shot to the face. Stomping and facial ripping ensue as things slow down and we hit the chinlock. Virgil fights up and is quickly dropped with a right hand to the exposed nose. You can’t blame Shawn for going too complicated here and it’s going to get the fans to hate him even more. A clothesline cuts off the comeback attempt but Virgil manages a quick faceplant.

Now the comeback is on, with an atomic drop sending Shawn into the buckle. Virgil even takes off his own nose guard to hit a dropkick (I guess the guard was weighing him down?) for two. A knee misses in the corner though and Shawn hits the teardrop suplex for the pin at 12:13.

Rating: C. Completely fine match here but the biggest problem with Virgil is that he’s just…..there. Nothing about his work in the ring made him stand out whatsoever because he was just a guy in gear doing basic moves. That wasn’t going to last long and every day that he spent away from Ted DiBiase made him feel less important. Shawn was coming along as a heel, but he needs to heed Razor Ramon’s advice: just use the kick.

From Toledo, Ohio, April 7, 1992.

Tag Team Titles: Money Inc. vs. Bushwhackers

Money Inc., with Jimmy Hart, is defending shockingly enough. The champs jump them to start but a pair of Battering Rams break that up. Stereo biting of the pants/trunks have Money Inc. on the floor and we pause for a breather. We settle down to IRS taking over on Butch and sending him into the buckle.

A missed charge allows the tag off to Luke though and the champs are rammed into each other. Back to back Battering Rams send Money Inc. outside again and it’s time for some Hart advice. That actually seems to work for once as IRS takes over on Luke back inside, including an abdominal stretch.

We get the classic heel cheating behind the referee’s back, because that’s what good villains are supposed to do. IRS grabs the chinlock but Luke fights up and kicks DiBiase in the face. The hot tag brings in Butch to clean house as everything breaks down. Hart offers a distraction though and IRS gets in a knee to the back. An elbow drop of all things is enough to retain the titles at 8:31.

Rating: C. This felt entirely like a house show match and that’s more or less what it was, despite airing on Prime Time Wrestling. The fun team got in a few moments before the villains cheated to keep their titles. They didn’t bother doing anything overly complicated here and let their talent shine through, which is something that is going to work more often than not.

Back at the court, Gene tries to explain the idea of serving to Heenan, who is more interested in the Freebird Sisters. Gene’s serve is fine enough (though Heenan thinks he hit an old lady), but Heenan uses his racket to pick up some drinks. Gene thinks his has been spiked but Heenan reminds him that it’s free. Ok then.

From Biloxi, Mississippi, March 10, 1992.

British Bulldog vs. Rick Martel

Martel sends him into the corner to start and flips backwards because he likes to show off. Bulldog isn’t having that and grabs a headlock, which kills the crowd a good bit. An armbar doesn’t get much more of a reaction but an accidental referee distraction lets Martel send him outside.

Some shots to the back have Bulldog in trouble and Martel, like anyone paying attention, stomps away back inside. Bulldog fights up and starts a rather basic comeback, only to have Martel bail outside at the threat of a right hand (that’s the moneymaker you see). That doesn’t work for Bulldog, who throws him back inside for a sunset flip (including Martel grabbing the ropes and getting caught) and the pin at 5:21.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as it was a quick match with neither getting to do very much. Bulldog didn’t even get to use the powerslam, which made it feel a little lame. At the same time, they weren’t given the chance to really do anything, which is a shame as the talent is there for a good match. Bad circumstances here and they led to a not so good match.

We get a special profile on Intercontinental Champion Bret Hart. This includes the last few minutes of his title win over Mr. Perfect at Summerslam 1991 (an absolute classic) and the last few minutes of his defense against Skinner at This Tuesday In Texas.

From Springfield, Massachusetts, November 12, 1991.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Barbarian

Barbarian is challenging and tries to put the title around himself to start the match. We’re ready to go with Bret fighting out of a headlock but getting shouldered out to the floor in a big crash. Back in and another shoulder drops Bret again, but this time he manages to stay inside (baby steps).

A crossbody goes badly as well but Barbarian misses an elbow drop. An armbar slows Barbarian down a bit, at least until he comes back with a hot shot to drop Bret again. Some rams into the post keep Hart’s back in trouble and Barbarian slowly chops away back inside. There’s the required chest first buckle shot and Barbarian grabs the bearhug.

Bret manages to fight out pretty quickly and cuts off a corner charge with a raised boot. A clothesline into the backbreaker into the middle rope elbow gives Bret two but the kickout sends him outside (that’s rather strong). Barbarian grabs a suplex for two and tries another one, only to get small packaged for the retaining pin at 12:28.

Rating: C+. This was as 1992 Bret Hart of a match as you could get and that means it went pretty well. Bret could be put in there against anyone and do a nice job, with the Barbarian fitting the bill pretty easily. One of the big appeals for Bret is being able to wrestle a good match with any opponent and it was on full display here. Barbarian might not have been a major star, but he knew what he was and played it the right way for a very long time.

Heenan isn’t doing so well against a woman sitting in a chair hitting balls to him. He’s off to get a new racket and leaves us with this.

From Biloxi, Mississippi, March 10, 1992.

Natural Disasters vs. Nasty Boys

Jimmy Hart is here with the Nastys. We pause for the Nastys to argue with a kid in the front row until Sags slugs away at Typhoon. With that not working, it’s off to Knobbs vs. Earthquake, which isn’t as much of a disaster for the Disaster. Earthquake shoulders him down a few times but Sags gets in a cheap shot with the helmet (Hayes: “Now there’s a nice move.”) to put him down for a change.

As commentary debates how horrible the Nastys really are, Sags slowly hammers away in the corner. Earthquake shrugs off some running elbows so Knobbs comes in to cut off a tag attempt. The referee misses the tag to Typhoon, who comes in anyway as everything breaks down. Earthquake hits a quick elbow to finish Sags at 6:33 as Typhoon throws Hart at Knobbs.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here between two teams you don’t see together very often. The Natural Disasters were a heck of a monster team for a little while, as the visual alone made them work. The Nastys were really starting to click around here too, and having the whole Jimmy Hart jumping around from team to team deal made it all the better. Not much of a match, but at least it didn’t last long.

From Kalamazoo, Michigan, April 8, 1992.

WWF Title: Randy Savage vs. IRS

IRS, with Jimmy Hart, is challenging three days after Savage won the title. They hit the stall button to start as IRS won’t let go of the briefcase. Back in and they finally lock up, with Savage grabbing a headlock. A Hart distraction lets IRS get to the floor as Sean warns Hayes to watch what he says because Savage is going to see this tape.

IRS gets back in and is quickly atomic dropped to the floor, where Savage can knock him into Hart. Back in and another Hart distraction lets IRS get in a knee to the back to finally take over. Savage is sent face first into the steps and Savage is in trouble. They get back inside and we hit the abdominal stretch, complete with a pull of the rope. The referee manages to catch him this time though and Savage gets in a few shots.

Another knee to the back drops the champ again though, as IRS continues his usual steady but not so interesting offense. The chinlock goes on, as do IRS’s feet on the ropes, but Savage fights up again. With nothing else working, Hart gets on the apron with the briefcase, only to have Savage ram IRS into it instead. Hart is knocked down and the top rope elbow retains the title at 11:17.

Rating: C. This was getting into the lamer version of Savage, as it was take a beating for a long time and then get in one shot, followed by the elbow for the pin. Savage still felt like a major star, but save for the Flair match, he wasn’t quite the same in the ring. If nothing else, I do like the idea of giving him a fairly easy title defense, especially as he had only won the title in the huge match a few days earlier.

And now, a special feature with Mr. Fuji and the Berzerker, showing us…..how to throw a party? First step: turn down the music so we can actually hear Fuji. First official step: getting the invitations right. Or in Berzerker’s case, find someone in the back and kidnap them. Then you need “lots of little gimmicks and stuff”, like streamers and balloons. You also need good food, like finger sandwiches, which means sticking your fingers in peanut butter and ribbing them on bread. That’s all you need to know! This wasn’t funny.

From Kalamazoo, Michigan, April 8, 1992.

Repo Man vs. El Matador

Feeling out process to start with Repo taking him into the corner and then working on an armbar. You don’t try to armbar Santana (commentary calls him that so I can too) as he reverses into one of his own before hammering away. A running crossbody gives Santana a quick two but Repo is back with his basic shots to the face. The slam into a legdrop gets two but Santana is back with a clothesline. Repo gets knocked outside and grappling hooks Santana in the ribs for the DQ at 7:30.

Rating: D+. Blech. This was rather boring and never got out of maybe first and a half gear. Their offenses were both very basic, which is rather sad when you consider just how good Santana could be with almost anyone. Granted Repo was never known for burning up the mat, but how do you have a lame match with Tito Santana?

Post match Repo chokes with the hook again, making Santana foam at the mouth.

From Niagara Falls, New York, April 28, 1992.

Legion Of Doom/Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc./Nasty Boys

Jimmy Hart is here with the villains and the other side has Paul Ellering. It takes over a minute to decide who starts until we get Hawk shoving DiBiase into the corner. DiBiase has some better luck with chops but Hawk cleans house with chops. Everything breaks down and the bad guys are sent to the floor and we slow down again. Sean: “This really is a classic tag team match.” First off, no it isn’t and second off, it’s just over three minutes in. That’s some rather fast classic designating.

We settle down to Hawk elbowing IRS in the face but Sags comes in for an elbow of his own. The villains start taking turns on Hawk, including DiBiase grabbing a neckbreaker for two. We hit the chinlock, because that’s what the match needs right now. Hawk fights up, gets caught in the wrong corner, and everything breaks down. Earthquake beats on Knobbs before sitting on Sags for the pin at 7:59.

Rating: D. Egads this tape could not have ended any faster and even these guys felt like they wanted out of there. This was another dull match to end a tape of them and there was no way around it. I know they didn’t have a ton of time, but they should have ha enough talent in there to have some kind of a wild fight. But then again, why do that when you can just stand around in slow motion?

Heenan believes he has mastered tennis and tries to jump the net, only to crotch himself. Some women show up to talk to Gene and that’s how we wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D. Bret vs. Barbarian is a rather basic match that was well done with Bret being good enough to make it work. It’s also the best match on the tape by a good margin, which should tell you about all you need here. They really couldn’t put in a better Shawn match or something with Flair or Piper? I like Money Inc. and the Natural Disasters, but I really didn’t need to see them this much. Savage’s match was even against half of Money Inc. to make sure they’re on there again. This wasn’t so much bad as much as it was completely uninteresting, which made this a much harder sit. Watch anything else.

 

 

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All American Wrestling
Date: April 8, 1990
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon, Hillbilly Jim
Hosts: Gene Okerlund, Hillbilly Jim

This popped on my YouTube recommendations and I can always go for some 1990 WWF. We are a week removed from Wrestlemania but it’s hard to say how much of this was taped in advance. If there is a studio portion, I’m sure we’ll hear all about it between a parade of squashes. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Gene Okerlund and Hillbilly Jim welcome us to the show and tell us about the Ultimate Warrior winning the WWF Title. Jim insists that Hulkamania will live forever though. They run down the card and we’re ready to go.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Don Stevens

Commentary goes over Dusty’s various careers, with Vince mentioning that Dusty was a “son of a plumber.” A dropkick and suplex set up a chinlock, followed by the big elbow to finish Stevens at 2:08.

The hosts talk about Wrestlemania VI and Hillbilly Jim’s hair. Because reasons.

House show ads, which are always cool to see.

SPECIAL REPORT!

Ultimate Warrior beat Hulk Hogan to win the WWF Title at Wrestlemania VI and we see some still shots. They make sure to clarify that Hogan is STILL awesome. Of note: we’re told that Jack Tunney will NOT sanction a rematch because it would be too physically grueling on both of them. That’s quite a nice way to cover up why Hogan never got a rematch, though you would think it would have been mentioned more often.

Orient Express vs. Omar Atlas/Paul Roma

Mr. Fuji is here with the Express, who clear the ring rather quickly. We settle down to Atlas in trouble as we get an insert promo from Fuji about how the Express will destroy anyone. Kato strikes away and Tanaka comes back in for a spinning forearm. A backbreaker/top rope ax handle combination finishes Atlas at 3:17.

Rating: C-. Total destruction here and it’s kind of interesting that Roma was in this spot just a few months before Power & Glory started up. The Express was a weird situation as they had all kinds of talent and could have a nice match with anyone (their stuff with the Rockers was great) but they never got above the midcard. It’s a shame as they could have been better, but they never got the chance.

Wrestlemania VII will (not) be at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum!

Warlord vs. Ricky Ataki

Warlord debuts Slick as his new manager and drops Ataki with a flying shoulder. A clothesline puts Ataki on the floor and there’s a suplex to drop him again. We get a quick Slick/Warlord inset interview with Slick being happy about his new acquisition. Warlord finishes with a running powerslam at 2:34. Nice squash.

We go to Madison Square Garden, seemingly on October 28, 1989.

Dino Bravo vs. Bret Hart

We’re joined in progress with Bret in trouble on the floor and having his already banged up chest knocked into the barricade. Back in and Bravo grabs the reverse chinlock before sending Bret right back to the floor. A sunset flip gives Bret two and but Bravo is right back with the bearhug.

They even drop to their knees for a bit in a weird spot before Bret bites his way to freedom. The bearhug goes right back on though and this time it’s a series of elbows to break it up. A suplex drops Bravo and Bret starts the comeback, including dropping an elbow for two. The backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow but the time expires at 8:46 shown for the 20:00 draw (which was actually about 18:40).

Rating: C-. That wasn’t exactly great as it was mainly spent on the bearhug and Hart having to fight out of trouble. Then the ending came out of nowhere, which granted might have had something to do with showing about nine minutes of the match. These two fought quite a bit but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen them have a good one, so this wasn’t a surprise.

We go to the Brother Love Show, with the Bushwhackers as this week’s guests. Love laughs at them about Rhythm and Blues attacking them recently, sending Butch into a rant about how IT’S NOT FUNNY WHEN SOMEONE GETS HIT WITH A GUITAR. Butch threatens Love, who runs off to end a rather nothing segment, save for butch losing his mind.

Earthquake vs. Jim Gorman

Earthquake has Jimmy Hart with him and promises to hurt Hulk Hogan. The powerslam, a top rope chop to the head, and the Earthquake finishes Gorman at 1:37.

Post match Earthquake crushes him two more times and Gorman leaves on a stretcher.

House show ads.

Jim Duggan vs. Black Bart

Duggan works on the arm to start and sends him into the corner for a clothesline. The three point clothesline finishes Bart at 2:34. Duggan continues to be goofy fun and that would be the case forever.

Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, says this is his year. Heenan says they’re coming for the good guys.

Jimmy Snuka says his mind is clean and he loves competition.

Gene thinks there are animals in Jim’s beard to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s nothing much to the show but that’s kind of the point. This was about getting people on the show and mentioning some of the things they were doing. Granted in this case you had Wrestlemania fallout so there was quite a bit to cover from the biggest show of the year. I could go for some more like this, as it’s quick and easy while showcasing a lot of the talent of the era.

 

 

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WrestleFest 1991
Host: Randy Savage
Commentators: Lord Alfred Hayes, Sean Mooney

Sometimes you need to get away from weekly TV and do some good(ish) old fashioned Coliseum Video. That’s what we have here, with another compilation tape released in July 1991. You never know what you might get on here but that can make for some interesting watches. Let’s get to it.

Randy Savage: Man Of Leisure (as the graphic says) is sitting by the pool as the audio from his career ending loss at Wrestlemania VII plays in his head. He was NOT asleep….or maybe he was, but just for a few seconds. Yes he lost, but he had a great career and wrestled some of the best of all time. The only one he didn’t get to face was the best of all time: himself (that’s such a Savage thing). Savage introduces our first match.

Jimmy Hart says Earthquake is ready to crush Ultimate Warrior in the Fan Favorite match.

From Fort Myers, Florida, February 19, 1991.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Earthquake

Earthquake slugs away from behind but can’t put Warrior down. Instead Warrior is back with some shoulders, including a flying one to send Earthquake outside. A Hart distraction lets Earthquake get in a cheap shot though and it’s a drive into the corner back inside. The slow beating, including that weird jumping stomp that Earthquake had, sets up the bearhug (you knew that was coming).

Warrior’s leg starts twitching so Earthquake picks him up (points for not going with the obvious escape route) to keep the hold on. The big elbow and the Earthquake connect for two as Warrior is ready to get going. Three straight clotheslines set up a slam and the Warrior Splash is good for the pin at 5:37.

Rating: C. This felt very much like a dark match at the end of a taping to get one of the biggest stars out there against a big monster. Warrior shrugged off everything Earthquake had and then won in just over five minutes. It was short, to the point, and did what it needed to do without looking bad. Nice choice for an opener, even if they had a very basic match.

Savage tells us where to write in to request a match. This will in no way be used to get on the WWF’s mailing list. With that out of the way, to the Manager Cam, which means Jimmy Hart is going to be mic’d with a camera on him during a match.

From Green Bay, Wisconsin, May 7, 1991.

Big Boss Man vs. The Mountie

No commentary for this one. Hart (expect to hear that name a lot here) demands that the referee take the nightstick from the Boss Man, who punches Mountie down to start. Mountie’s leapfrog is countered into a spinebuster and Boss Man steals Hart’s jacket (Hart: “MOUNTIE! MOUNTIE!”), which he threatens to send into the crowd. Hart gets the jacket back and Mountie goes outside for a breather, only to get punched down again. Boss Man chokes on the ropes for a bit (Hart: “GET OFF THE ROPE!”) and hits the running crotch attack to the back of the neck (Hart: “Referee, quit picking your nose and do something man!”).

A missed charge finally gives Mountie a breather, sending Hart into a rant about how Mountie has to get up and do something. Hart tells him everything to do to the leg, including wrapping it around the post. Boss Man tries to swing but falls down, prompting Hart to laugh at “the big hick”. Mountie grabs the mic to hit his catchphrase but Boss Man punches his way up and hits a one legged Boss Man Slam for the pin at 6:31.

Rating: C+. This was fun! The match itself was mostly a Boss Man squash with Mountie getting in a bit of work on the leg. Instead, we got a unique way to look at a match, with Hart playing it completely straight and making it a lot more interesting. I can go with something different like this, as the WWF so rarely went in a unique direction. Good stuff and very out of the box.

Post match Hart gets in the ring and tells Mountie that he’ll sucker Boss Man over so Mountie can zap him with the shock stick. And that’s exactly what they do!

From Omaha, Nebraska, April 15, 1991.

Power And Glory vs. Rockers

Slick is here with Power And Glory. We hit the stall button to start until Shawn and Roma lock up over a minute and a half in. Roma has to bail to the ropes early on before hitting Shawn in the face to take over. Michaels is right back with the hurricanrana into the right hands, followed by the double superkick to send Roma outside.

Back in and Roma dropkicks Marty down, only to get his head taken off with a clothesline. A Hercules cheap shot lets the double teaming ensue though and Marty is caught in the wrong corner again. Hercules actually stays in for a bit,, with his own clothesline getting his own two. Roma’s big running elbow (he always did that well) sets up the chinlock to keep Marty down.

That’s broken up but Roma clotheslines him again (a popular move here) and hits a top rope elbow to the head. Marty finally avoids a charge in the corner though and the diving tag brings Shawn in to clean house. The jumping back elbow hits Roma in the face and a swinging neckbreaker gets two. Everything breaks down and Hercules is clotheslined (geez) out to the floor, leaving Roma to get double hiptossed. Hold on though as Slick offers a distraction, which is enough to get the Rockers counted out at 12:06.

Rating: C. Not bad here as the Rockers were really starting to gel a few months before they split. Power And Glory are a good enough team, though you could see Hercules losing more and more steam as he just couldn’t move very well. The countout was fairly lame though, as you really can’t have Power And Glory get rolled up for a quick pin here?

Post match the fight continues with the Rockers cleaning house and stealing Slick’s hat. To be fair, it’s a pretty sweet hat.

We go to Randy Savage’s Tranquility Base (that’s Tranquility Base USA, because Savage might be nuts, but he’s an American nut) and it’s time to play some pool.

Ted DiBiase is ready to beat up the Texas Tornado, who is a great example of a Cadillac body and a Volkswagen brain.

From Orlando, Florida, February 18, 1991.

Ted DiBiase vs. Texas Tornado

Commentary points out the lack of DiBiase’s manager Sherri (which is code for “this was taped before Wrestlemania when Sherri and DiBiase got together). Before the match, Tornado brings out Virgil, who had broken up with DiBiase about a month ago. DiBiase yells at Virgil as Hayes talks about the rigorous process required to become a manager. That could be some fascinating paperwork.

Tornado goes outside to jump DiBiase and the bell rings for the second time. They head inside with Tornado sending him face first into the buckle over and over, setting up a rollup for two. Virgil has to send DiBiase back inside (Mooney: “He’s just giving his former employer a hand!”), only to have them go right back to the floor.

The Tornado Punch hits DiBiase but another only hits post, allowing DiBiase to send the hand into the steps. Back in and DiBiase elbows him in the face, setting up the always awesome falling punch. DiBiase knocks him outside again and tries a suplex to bring Tornado back inside. Virgil is right there with a trip to DiBiase though and Tornado gets the pin at 4:17.

Rating: D+. And somehow, Tornado would stick around for about another year. I’m not sure how many drugs he did to fall apart as badly as he did but a whole lot seems to be pretty low. This was a slow, boring match with the hand stuff not leading anywhere and Tornado sleepwalking through it, as usual.

From Fort Myers, Florida, February 19, 1991.

Haku vs. British Bulldog

Hayes talks about both of them having a rugby background and Mooney seems to have played as well. Haku grinds away on a headlock to start but a dropkick sends him outside. Back in and Bulldog grabs a sleeper, which is countered with an armdrag of all things. That’s broken up and Bulldog grabs an armbar, only to be reversed into an atomic drop. The piledriver gives Haku two and we hit the sleeper. Bulldog fights up for a double shoulder and Haku is able to grab a chinlock. With that broken up, Bulldog avoids a dropkick and gets two off a clothesline. Back up and Bulldog grabs a crucifix for the pin at 7:41.

Rating: C+. This was a nice power match and they worked well together. Matches like this are the reason I like seeing these tapes as you never know when you are going to find a good match that isn’t going to take place in a major feud. Smith was on his way up and Haku can make anyone look good so this was a fun mix that I was getting into by the end.

Randy Savage plays pool. While he plays, it’s time for a trip to the Barber Shop.

We go to the Barber Shop with Brutus Beefcake for some grooming tips. This includes putting mud (from the Dead Sea, as written on the container in marker) on someone’s face and then cracking an egg on top of said face. Then Beefcake blows it off with a leaf blower. This takes quite awhile but it’s the kind of character stuff that is at least a bit different. Can you imagine seeing something like this not being a total disaster today?

From Biloxi, Mississippi, March 12, 1991.

Greg Valentine vs. Rick Martel

This was part of Valentine’s face run and….well what are you expecting from a Valentine face run? They fight over a top wristlock to start with Valentine getting the better of things and knocking Martel outside. Some and actually start a HAMMER chant as Martel stalls on the floor even more. Back in and Valentine grabs a headlock before going after the leg.

The Figure Four is blocked so Valentine drops an elbow on the leg and cranks away again. Martel fights back and sends him outside, followed by a middle rope ax handle back inside. The abdominal stretch goes on for a bit before Valentine blocks a ram into the buckle. The comeback is on and Valentine clotheslines him outside. Valentine follows him to the floor for the brawl and it’s a double countout at 8:12.

Rating: C-. Martel was his usual serviceable self here but Valentine as a good guy still really doesn’t work. I’m not sure what the appeal there was supposed to be, other than maybe just seeing if they could get anything else out of him. All this showed me was that Valentine wasn’t going to be interesting no matter what he did around this time and there was no way around it.

Post match Valentine beats him down again, setting up the Figure Four. What a hero.

From Fort Myers, Florida, February 19, 1991.

Warlord vs. Koko B. Ware

Slick his here with Warlord, who powers Ware into the corner to start. There’s a choke toss to send Ware flying again but he comes back with some right hands. Ware heads outside to annoy Warlord, but Slick suggests that he is a chicken. Well they never said what kind of BIRD man Ware was so there may be something to that.

Back in and Ware goes to the eyes and hammers away, only to be sent sailing over the top. A sunset flip doesn’t work on Warlord and we hit the bearhug. Warlord finally lets it go for some reason (he never was known for his brains) and misses an elbow. Ware avoids a charge in the corner and rolls him up for two, followed by the missile dropkick (with Ware landing on his feet as only he could) for the same. That’s enough for Warlord, who powerslams him for the pin at 6:38.

Rating: C. This was the kind of match that fit a formula perfectly well as the power guy had trouble with the smaller opponent before finally catching him. It’s not a classic, but this was about as basic of a match formula as you could ask for and it worked well enough. If nothing else, Ware’s missile dropkick is always worth a look.

Despite being retired, Randy Savage watches his match against Ultimate Warrior to look for mistakes.

From Biloxi, Mississippi, March 12, 1991.

Hart Foundation vs. Legion Of Doom

Well ok, as this appears to be their only (recorded) match against each other. This is also non-title, as the Harts, who were champions when this was filmed but not when it was released, don’t even have the belts with them. Animal and Neidhart lock up to start and the power shove doesn’t get anywhere. Shoulders don’t do anything but a double clothesline puts both of them down.

Back up and Animal’s flying shoulder drops Neidhart and it’s Hawk coming in to work on the arm. Hart comes in as well but gets sent outside in a hurry as Hawk isn’t having any of this. Back in and Bret takes Hawk into the corner so Neidhart can come in to slow him down. It’s right back to Bret for two off the backbreaker, followed by the middle rope elbow for two more.

Hawk gets over to the corner for the unseen tag, leaving Neidhart to hit the slingshot shoulder for two. The chinlock goes on, with Mooney somehow trying to say this has been “even”, despite Hawk getting beaten down for the last five minutes. The Hart Attack connects with Animal having to make the save. Neidhart tries to whip Bret into Hawk in the corner but only hits buckle, allowing the hot tag off to Animal to clean house.

Everything breaks down and Hawk gets sent into the corner for a hard clothesline to Hart. The Doomsday Device is broken up though and Bret hits the backbreaker on Animal. Another slingshot shoulder looks to set up something like a Rocket Launcher but Animal powerslams Bret out of the air for the pin at 12:32.

Rating: B. This was a rare moment that lived up to the hype and I wouldn’t have bet on that coming in. You don’t see this kind of thing working most of the time but they pulled it off here, with the Harts dictating the pace and the LOD being there with the raw power. Normally this would be little more than a historical footnote but they had a very good match at the same time.

Respect is shown post match.

From New York City, New York, March 15, 1991.

Marty Jannetty vs. Tanaka

This is your main event because….I have no idea, though it’s nice to go to the Garden instead of random TV tapings. Mr. Fuji is here with Tanaka but neither partner is here. Tanaka strikes away to take over and kicks Jannetty around the ring. Jannetty comes back and knocks him to the floor before doing it again for a bonus. This time Jannetty dives out onto Tanaka for a crash as things slow back down.

Back in and Fuji offers a distraction, allowing Tanaka to get a turnbuckle pad off. Jannetty is fine enough to superkick Tanaka into the corner but a missed charge sends Jannetty falling outside. After the referee scares Fuji away from using that pesky cane, Tanaka drops a rather low looking headbutt. A rollup gives Jannetty a breather but a jumping forearm cuts that off rather quickly. There’s a chop to send Jannetty outside and Fuji smiles rather deviously. Back in and Tanaka tries a Tombstone but Jannetty reverses into the Owen Hart version to drop Tanaka on his head for the pin at 10:53.

Rating: C+. Two talented wrestlers were able to make this work but there is only so much that you can get out of a pair of tag wrestlers having a match without their partners around. The fact that Mooney announced the winner as “Shawn Michaels’ partner Marty Jannetty” kind of sums up the issue here, but they did have a perfectly watchable match. Granted the ending might make you cringe but Tanaka was ok so it’s acceptable enough.

Randy Savage gets a phone call from Elizabeth and that means it’s time to wrap up the tape.

Overall Rating: C+. This was on the more decent side of Coliseum videos, as you had mostly pretty good to solid matches and the only two which weren’t so strong were shorter. Throw in the unique Manager Cam deal and a near hidden gem with the Harts vs. LOD and this worked well. It’s nothing you need to see but if you’re in the mood for some lighter fare, you would be just fine with this one.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 23, 2023
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Corey Graves, Kevin Patrick

It’s Raw XXX as the company celebrates thirty years on the air. As usual with the big Raw milestone episodes, we’ll be seeing a bunch of legends for special appearances. In addition, there are two title matches and a cage match so the card is stacked. If that isn’t enough, it’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here are Hulk Hogan and Jimmy Hart to get things going. Hogan talks about Raw debuting in 1993, pauses because the mic doesn’t work, praises the Philadelphia Eagles and is all done.

We look at some of the cities the show has taken place in over the years before switching into the big highlight package. The hit a lot of the big names, including a bunch of AEW names, debuts, title changes, reveals and almost anything else you could want. WWE has absolutely not forgotten how to montage.

Here is the Bloodline with their long form entrance for the Trial Of Sami Zayn. After having Philadelphia acknowledge him, Reigns hands the mic to Paul Heyman so we pause for an ECW chant. Heyman: “ECW is dead and I wish the same for Sami Zayn.” Heyman accuses Zayn of being in a conspiracy with Kevin Owens since day one (that was only last January).

Zayn has been trying to lure the Bloodline into a false sense of security, just like the Philadelphia Eagles. Heyman brings up BROCK….Purdy, the quarterback of the San Francisco 49ers, who will beat the Eagles next week. We see some clips of Sami not exactly helping in fights, capped off by Zayn BUMPING INTO REIGNS while going on a rant. Heyman says that should be enough for Zayn to be GUILTY AS CHARGED (nice).

Zayn gets his chance to talk and he wasn’t sure how he was going to feel when he came out here. He can’t believe that he is on trial here, but his defense is that he has no defense. Reigns is disgusted at the disrespect and tells Solo Sikoa to take care of him. The Samoan Spike is loaded up but Jey Uso cuts Sikoa off.

Jey has his own footage, showing a montage of Sami helping the Bloodline over the last few months, including taking out Kevin Owens in WarGames. Jey talks about how Sami saw the good in him the entire time and that’s what family does. Fans: “UCEY!” We get a fan poll of whether Sami should stay and the fans seem pretty unanimous.

Jimmy even agrees and Reigns gets to his feet. Reigns finds Zayn not guilty…..for now. In the meantime, Sami can finish out tonight by making the Bloodline proud. After that, Reigns doesn’t want to see or hear from Sami until the Royal Rumble, where Sami delivers his final test. There’s your drama for Owens vs. Reigns on Saturday as this story takes a pretty big step forward.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Judgment Day

The Usos are defending and have Sami Zayn in the corner to counter Finn Balor/Rhea Ripley. Jimmy and Dominik start things off but Jimmy has to kick Priest to the floor. Priest Pounces Jimmy over the announcers’ table and the champs are in trouble. Back in and Dominik chokes a bit, only to have Jimmy get over to Jey without much trouble. The running Umaga attack gets two on Dominik but Priest is back in with a superkick.

Priest hits the step up flip dive to take the Usos down again. Back in and the Usos fire off some superkicks to drop Priest and Dominik, but Balor offers a distraction. The referee catches Balor crotching Jey and gets ejected, leaving Priest to get superkicked down. Jimmy’s Superfly Splash gets…..two and everyone can breathe a bit. Jimmy takes Priest down on the floor and hold on as Jimmy has hurt his knee.

The referee throws up the X and Jimmy is taken out, with Adam Pearce saying if Jimmy is out, the match and titles are forfeited. Sami says not so fast, as Sami USO is ready to go, with Pearce saying let’s go. We get back to the match with Sami diving on Dominik and Priest on the floor. Dominik grabs a quick rollup with his feet on the ropes for two but Sami suplexes him into the corner. Ripley breaks up the Helluva Kick though and it’s South Of Heaven from Priest to give Dominik two.

The 619 is broken up by Jey’s superkick but Jey can’t bring himself to superkick Ripley. The distraction lets Dominik hit the 619 on Jey and the frog splash gets two as Sami makes a diving save of his own. Priest goes shoulder first into the post so Dominik dumps Sami, who is back in with a blind tag. The superkick into the 1D retains the titles at 14:06.

Rating: B+. I needed a breath after that one as those were some crazy hot near falls. They had me believing that Judgment Day could have taken the titles more than once and it was one close two count after another. This was one of the best Raw matches WWE in years and one of the better things WWE has done anywhere in a good while. Everything was laid out so well and the wrestlers executed it to near perfection.

In the back, Roman Reigns says he still doesn’t want to see Sami until the Royal Rumble.

JBL and Baron Corbin ask the Godfather to put him in the poker game. Godfather will have to ask the host. Said host happens to be Ron Simmons, who is happy with a payoff to get Corbin’s name on the list. They go into the APA’s office and it’s pretty much a full on casino with all kinds of wrestlers and wrestling personalities included.

Here is LA Knight who says he is all man and doesn’t want to wait for the Pitch Black match. He calls out any legend…..and the gong sounds. And then it’s the American Bad***, with song and motorcycle. Knight talks about how he’s going to have everyone chanting his name….and then the lights go out. Bray Wyatt, with lantern, pops up to back Knight into Undertaker, who grabs him by the throat. Bray gets inside and Undertaker tosses Knight over for Sister Abigail. Fans: “HOLY S***!” Undertaker goes to leave but stops to whisper something to Bray before riding off.

We go back to the poker game, where Madusa (with Women’s Title belt) seems to win but loses to Diamond Dallas Page.

Bayley vs. Becky Lynch

In a cage with pinfall, submission or escape. Hold on though as Becky has to beat up the rest of Damage Ctrl on the floor. All of Damage Ctrl gets inside to beat on Becky before the bell rings. Adam Pearce finally gets inside as Damage Ctrl sits on top of the cage. No match.

Here is D-Generation X, with Kurt Angle. Road Dogg does the catchphrase but asks why Angle is here. Kurt says he always wanted to be in the team and pulls off his own shirt to reveal a DX shirt. Hold on as Kurt will have to pass a test. HHH: “Are you ready?” Kurt: “Was that the test?” They load up the bigger catchphrase but Imperium of all people interrupts. Imperium doesn’t like these degenerates and a fight is teased. HHH: “I’m retired.” Shawn: “I’m too old.” Dogg: “Who am I kidding?”

We get a DX huddle and HHH volunteers Kurt to fight. Kurt: “No I won’t.” Dogg: “We’re in a pickle.” Cue Seth Rollins and then the Street Profits and we seem to have a six man. Dogg thinks we need to make it official and looks at HHH for an announcement. HHH: “Why does everybody look at me for something like this? This booking stuff isn’t easy!” We need someone body out there to make sense of this. Cue Teddy Long for the only possible payoff, but we also need a guest referee. Kurt just happens to have a referee shirt on too (red white and blue stripes of course) and we’re ready to go after some funny stuff.

Imperium vs. Seth Rollins/Street Profits

Kurt Angle is guest referee and Jerry Lawler is on commentary. Vinci’s headlock on Rollins doesn’t last long so it’s off to Ford, who gets clotheslined down. Kaiser comes in and strikes it out with Dawkins for a double knockdown. That means the tags to Gunther and Rollins with Gunther taking over and knocking Rollins out of the air.

We take a break and come back with Rollins fighting out of a chinlock and backflipping out of a belly to back suplex. The hot tag brings in Ford and the Profits grab stereo ankle locks. That’s too far for Gunther, who comes in and breaks them up. Gunther stares Angle down and pokes him in the chest, with Rollins coming in for the save. The Profits hit the flip dives to the floor, leaving Rollins to get dropkicked and powerbombed to give Gunther two. Rollins is back in with an Angle Slam and the Profits hit a Doomsday Blockbuster on Kaiser. A Pedigree sends Gunther outside and it’s a frog splash into the Stomp to finish Vinci at 13:03.

Rating: C+. It was a good six man, with the most important part being Gunther not taking the fall. They had me worried that Rollins would pin him to set something up between them (which might be the case anyway even without the pin) as it wasn’t the time for Gunther to get beaten. The Profits and Rollins winning works well and they had a good match on the way there, though DX and Angle were the stars of the whole deal.

Back to the poker game where Ted DiBiase loses a fortune….but IRS wants JBL and Baron Corbin to pay their taxes and takes the money back. Well save for $100. Ron Simmons, catchphrase.

Bobby Lashley promises to get the US Title back when MVP interrupts. MVP again offers the reunion but Lashley isn’t in.

Here is Ric Flair for a chat. He hits the catchphrases and introduces Charlotte for the big family moment. Charlotte thanks the other women for making her such a decorated champion but this will always be her show. Cue Bianca Belair to interrupt, saying she goes here now and this is her show. Cue Sonya Deville to ask about her recognition for working so hard. Charlotte owes Deville but offers Belair the chance to deal with Deville. Deal.

Sonya Deville vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title. Belair flips over her to start but Deville gets in a shot to the face. Back up and Belair is sent into the corner, where she backflips over Deville and hits a backbreaker. A running boot knocks Deville outside but Belair gets sent into the barricade as we take a break. We come back with Deville dropping her again for two but Belair pops up and hits the KOD for the pin at 8:33 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: D. That was a weird ending and it wouldn’t shock me if something was cut for time. In addition to that though, the match was quite the mess as it felt like a complete lack of chemistry. Deville feels in way over her head and it doesn’t help that she seems to be there as a filler challenger to Charlotte until we get to the important stuff. Not a good match whatsoever, but at least it didn’t take up too much time.

Post match Belair says that was just a preview for what she is going to do to Alexa Bliss. Cue Bliss on screen, talking into a mirror about how violent she can be with no one helping her.

Video on Cody Rhodes’ 2022 before he returns this weekend at the Royal Rumble.

John Cena is the cover star for WWE 2K23.

Here is Miz to ask where his special time on this show is. Cue Kevin Owens to Stun Miz and leave him laying, promising to take out Roman Reigns at the Rumble.

Royal Rumble rundown.

US Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Austin Theory

Lashley is challenging and this is No DQ. Lashley goes with the power to start and clotheslines him out to the floor. The posting rocks Theory and we take an early break. Back with Theory slipping out of the delayed suplex and catching Lashley with the rolling dropkick for a stagger.

Lashley is fine enough to send him to the apron for a running forearm and the table is sent inside. The Hurt Lock is broken up but Lashley sends him face first into a chair in the corner. Lashley loads up the table, only to get sprayed with a fire extinguisher. A whip into the steps keeps Lashley in trouble and we take a break.

Back with Lashley hitting a superplex, leaving both of them down. The spear through the table in the corner is broken up and Theory kicks him low. Lashley is fine enough to put Theory through another table….and Brock Lesnar is here. The F5 plants Lashley and another one to Theory puts him on top of Lashley to retain at 14:23.

Rating: C+. You almost have to expect that Lesnar is going to show up somewhere in there on these shows and going after Lashley again isn’t a surprise. Given that Lashley mentioned a rematch with Lesnar was coming soon, they were kind of telegraphing the whole thing. That should be a heck of a fight, though this one was only pretty good, with Theory retaining in the right result.

Overall Rating: B. This was kind of an all over the place show, but the biggest problem was the first hour, as nothing was touching that Bloodline segment and the Tag Team Title match. Other than that, you had a few random cameos from the legends and a bunch of classic stills, but the majority of the show was just an amped up Raw. I liked more than enough of it for the show to be a success, but it wasn’t quite as much of a nostalgia trip as I was expecting.

Results
Usos b. Judgment Day – 1D to Dominik
Seth Rollins/Street Profits b. Imperium – Frog splash to Vinci
Bianca Belair b. Sonya Deville – KOD
Austin Theory b. Bobby Lashley – F5

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 20, 1986
Location: Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Ernie Ladd, Johnny V

I’m not sure what to expect from this show and that is what makes the show so much fun. Instead of one big story, it’s more like they’re picking random wrestlers who have a little something going on at the moment and throw them into some squash matches. That’s how things worked in the Golden Era so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick host intro.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Hart Foundation vs. Islanders

This is when the Islanders were still good guys and Jimmy hart is in the Harts’ corner. Of note: the graphics say this include “Hako” and “Brett” Hart. The Harts jump them to start and clear the ring until it’s Neidhart kneeing Tama in the ribs. There’s a bite to the face as Johnny V makes south Pacific jokes.

Something like a Demolition Decapitator drops Tama again as we get an insert promo from Jimmy Hart about how much better his team is than the Islanders. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Haku so everything breaks down, with the barricade being knocked down at ringside. Toma busts out a crazy dive over the top (In 1986!) and the referee throws it out at 2:39, which is a bit of a surprise.

Post match the Islanders clean house without much trouble.

This week’s Wrestler’s Rebuttal is from Adrian Adonis, who is ready for his debate with Roddy Piper in the coming weeks. The topic: who has the better talk show segment. So they’re talking about talking? This isn’t so much a rebuttal as much as a clip from Superstars.

Randy Savage vs. Tony Garea

Non-title and AGAIN Danny Davis messes up by distracting Garea. Not that it matters as Garea is right back with a crossbody for two and a sunset flip for the same. Back up and Savage knees him out to the floor, setting up the top rope ax handle. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham in the desert, where he says he’s coming back to hurt someone. Like Savage for example. Savage takes him back inside, hits the slam and drops the elbow for the pin at 2:26. Garea got in a bit there but then it was the Savage Show, meaning it was awesome.

Jake Roberts thinks Ricky Steamboat is stupid for coming after him after getting burned once before. And no, he didn’t get the Snake Pit by brown nosing, but because he has talent.

Machines vs. Tiger Chung Lee/Al Navarro/JJ Jackson

Oddly enough, Hayes doesn’t know Jackson’s name and has to ask him. Lou Albano is here with the Machines: Big Machine (Blackjack Mulligan), Super Machine (Ax from Demolition) and Giant Machine (I’ll let you figure it out). Lee and Big start things off as we get an insert promo from Bobby Heenan talking about how much smarter he is than Albano, who must have a machine for these machines. Jackson comes in and gets clotheslined by Super, who sends him into a right hand from Giant for the pin at 1:30. This team is hilarious in a way that would only work in wrestling.

Koko B. Ware, with music box blaring, gets Ken Resnick to dance with him. He is no stepping stone.

BUY WWF MAGAZINE!

BUY LJN ACTION FIGURES! No really, as those things are valuable today.

BUY WWF THUMB WRESTLERS! I think I had most of those.

Dream Team vs. Lanny Poffo/Dick Slater

That’s a heck of a random jobber team and oddly enough they get a full entrance while Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine are already in the ring. Poffo’s poem is about how Slater is a rebel from Dixie who will do his thing. Valentine slams Poffo to start as we get an insert promo from Mr. Fuji, who does NOT like Dixie. Slater comes in and elbows Valentine in the head for two.

That’s enough for Johnny V, the Dream Team’s manager, to bail on commentary and go take care of his team. A suplex gets two on Slater and a sunset flip gives him two on Valentine. Everything breaks down and Valentine snaps Poffo’s throat across the top rope so Beefcake can get the pin at 2:35. The V stuff made it a bit more interesting.

And now, the Snake Pit with Bobby Heenan and Paul Orndorff. Jake talks about fakers and Orndorff says Hulk Hogan wants to be him. The robe comes off so Orndorff can pose, with Heenan saying Orndorff’s thirst will only be quenched when he wins the WWF Title.

Sika vs. Rick Hunter

The Wizard is here with Sika. Hunter slugs away to start and gets choked down with no effect. Sika slaps him down and we get an insert interview from Honky Tonk Man, who is still on his way. Hunter tries to forearm his way out of trouble and gets choked into the corner. More choking ensues as the Wizard shouts at Sika, who finishes with the Samoan drop (with Sika more laying him down than dropping) for the pin at 3: 23.

Rating: D. When the Samoan drop isn’t looking great, there is only so much that you’re going to get out of a match. Sika was never much on his own but was quite great when he was part of the Wild Samoans. That being said, this was another weak match which got some time, partially due to Honky Tonk Man sucking any life out of the thing with his out of date good guy act.

Video on the Rougeau Brothers riding motorcycles and in a boat. Riveting.

Killer Bees vs. Terry Gibbs/Jack Foley

Ladd thinks the Bees have ants in their pants and Monsoon thinks the Dream Team is scared to put their “John Henry” on a contract with the Killer Bees. Brunzell and Gibbs trade wristlocks to start before it’s off to Blair. Gibbs misses a running elbow so Jack comes in, only to get fireman’s carried.

This lets Johnny get in another “Iwo Jima, out of ammo” line, which must have some other meaning. An atomic drop and jumping knee drop Jack and a double elbow does the same. The arm work continues as Ladd refers to the Dream Team as the “Dream Machine”. Johnny keeps talking about how ugly Foley is and a flying hip attack gives Blair the pin at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Another slow and nothing match, with commentary sounding WAY off being the main focus. There were all kinds of tag teams around this time and the Bees, while good, weren’t exactly going to stand out when the British Bulldogs and the Harts etc. were around. They were a big enough deal here and felt like something of stars. That being said, the Jack guy would get a bit better when he started going by something closer to his real name: Mick. Yeah I know it’s not much of a secret, but I need something to get me through these matches.

Bobby Heenan says Mr. Wonderfulmania is running wild and Paul Orndorff comes in to talk about how jealous Hogan is. Hogan can’t lift like him so he stole Real American and the t-shirt ripping. Heenan chants WONDERFUL to wrap things up.

Here’s who’s coming next week.

Cue that musical review!

Overall Rating: D+. Randy Savage can only give you so much on a show with almost nothing else. The Harts vs. the Islanders felt like it could have had potential but then nothing came of it due to time. The Machines are always good for a chuckle, but I need a little more than the rapid fire short matches with almost nothing worth seeing. Still though, this is about as straight up my alley as I can get so we’ll definitely be back.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 13, 1986
Location: Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Ernie Ladd, Johnny V

It’s the second episode and there is one simple question: how many times can Ernie Ladd use the terms “without a doubt” or “without a shadow of a doubt”? Last time was roughly 47 each in a show that didn’t even last an hour so he could get in his two statements dozens more time if he puts his mind to trying. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick host intro.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Funks vs. George Steele/Junkyard Dog

Unfortunately it’s Jimmy Jack instead of Terry (with Jimmy Hart). Slightly more fortunately, Steele and Dog have Lou Albano with them. After Steele stops to eat a turnbuckle, Dog fires off some headbutts to clear out the Funks again. We actually start with Hoss (Dory) being rammed into the corner as Albano gives us an inset interview to talk about Steele and Dog working together well because they’re so different. He goes on so long that the inset window goes away mid sentence, which might be the best idea.

Steele gets taken into the corner as commentary bickers incessantly. It’s off to Dog for an awkward collision with Jimmy Jack in the corner and let’s try some hogtying! Steele makes the save with a chair and it’s a belly to back suplex to finish Jimmy Jack at 2:19. Somehow this was bad even in such a short amount of time.

Post match Jimmy Jack gets hogtied for fun. Then the winners, including Albano, dance as we get a referee (ignore the one count coming before Dog had the cover).

This week’s Wrestler’s Rebuttal is from the Hart Foundation, who don’t like being called nasty boys. They’ve been called Beer Belly and Greaseball but Bret says they’re the best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be. Dang he got that one in earlier than I thought.

Kamala vs. Mario Mancini

Kamala (or Kamalee according to Lord Alfred Hayes) has Wizard and Kim Chee with him. After taking a good bit of time to get rid of his stuff, Kamala chops away on Mancini, even after he’s already down. The inset promo from the Wizard (identified as Curtis Iaukea by Monsoon) talks about getting a monster in Singapore as the squash continues. A kick to the ribs sets up more chops and the splash finishes Mancini at 1:59.

Captain Lou Albano talks about his psychologists/gynecologists (right) working with George Steele. Intelligence aside, he has the heart of a lion and knows every move. He may not use them, but he knows them you see. Steele grew up with a lisp but had a steel plate put over his tongue in a failed attempt to cure his speech impediment. Now he’s fighting….multiple sclerosis? Well that got serious quickly. Steele says he was told to be vicious, so he’ll do be vicious to Randy Savage.

Hillbilly Jim/Cousin Luke vs. Jack Kruger/Joe Mirto

The Hillbillies get jumped from behind to start but get cleared out without much trouble. Jim beats on Mirto as we hear from Jimmy Hart, who is sending his boys after the Hillbillies because he doesn’t like country music. Luke slams Mirto but misses an elbow, allowing Kruger to come in. Ladd says Luke’s tennis shoes are called “burglar boots” where he’s from as Luke fights up and brings Jim back in. A double slam sets up a bearhug to finish Kruger at 2:37. Hillbilly Jim was fun but adding in his relatives dragged the act down fast.

Interviewer Ken Resnick talks about how many great teams there are here and brings in the undefeated Rougeaus. They want to face every team to get their hands on the British Bulldogs for the Tag Team Titles. They inspire each other and while they respect the Bulldogs, they like the titles more. Both of them are a bit chatty but they were a fine team.

Honky Tonk Man is coming soon and talks about going out dancing last night with the 57 Chevy top down. He wants Paul Orndorff too. This gimmick as a face is an all time WHAT WERE THEY THINKING moment.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Roger Kirby

Steamboat leapfrogs him a few times to start but gets hiptossed for his efforts. The armdrags into an armbar put Kirby down and that works so well that Steamboat does it again. An atomic drop gets Kirby out of trouble and he kind of awkwardly kicks at Steamboat in what might have been a bit of miscommunication. Steamboat can’t chop out of the corner but he can ram Kirby into the buckle. Kirby is fine enough to knock him into the ropes though and Steamboat’s leg gets tied up. Back in and Steamboat slides between the legs, hits a slam, and finishes with the high crossbody at 4:23.

Rating: C-. This was a bit of a weird one as Steamboat was beaten up more than you would have expected him to be. That being said, I could watch Steamboat all day as there are very few people who can make wrestling look so smooth. That slide through the legs and high crossbody looked great and Steamboat is one of the only few who can pull that off.

We go to the Snake Pit with Hillbilly Jim as this week’s guest. Jake talks about putting together one of his mom’s recipes but Jim isn’t impressed. Instead, Jake tells him to stomp twice if he doesn’t understand him. Jim says he’ll stay quiet and let the fools talk. They trade witty expressions (Jake’s is about a bird and Jim says sometimes the lights are on but no one is home). This was a weird one even by Jake standards.

King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd vs. Billy Jack Hayes/Paul Roma

Hayes can’t get anywhere with Studd so we’ll go with an insert promo from Harley Race, who brags about being a king. Studd has to block some slam attempts and hands it off to Bundy for an elbow to the face. The splash misses in the corner though and Roma comes in to clean house. That must last for a full seven seconds before Bundy hits the Avalanche in the corner for the pin at 2:34.

Corporal Kirchner/Jim Powers/Salvatore Bellomo vs. Hercules/Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff

Slick and Freddie Blassie are here with the villains. It’s a big brawl to start as the Americans break up the Russian national anthem (which earned some trash in the ring). We settle down to Sheik suplexing Bellomo and Hercules coming in to knee Powers in the ribs. As commentary suggests that Slick has an army of ladies of the evening in his employment, Sheik hits a running crotch attack to the back of the neck. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham, talking about his chimney being made of human skulls. With that out of the way, Hercules torture racks Powers for the win at 2:54.

Jimmy Hart and the Hart Foundation don’t like being called nasty boys. They’ve been accused of cheating and insist it is their skill/muscle that make them great. They’re coming for the British Bulldogs.

Here’s who’s coming next week.

Here is your musical review to wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C. They keep this show moving and that is a lot of fun every time. It is great to see the show have so much packed into about 45 minutes as opposed to one thing dominating the show. This was another easy to watch show and we’re inching closer to some of the biggest stuff the WWF will ever do, so it’s just getting started.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.