This was my fourth Axxess and my first on Thursday night, which is the opening session. The layout is roughly the same every year and there’s really no difference in the way the rooms look in any given year save for where stages are. I only did General Admission this year after a VIP session last year and honestly, it’s not that big of a difference unless there’s someone you REALLY want to meet.

For the sake of simplicity, I’ll put all the pictures up at the end.

As is always the case, getting in was a nightmare as the doors were supposed to open at 6pm and the line didn’t start moving until around 6:15. From what I’ve heard, General Admissions were allowed in BEFORE VIP this year, which defeats a big purpose of buying VIP in the first place.

As usual, almost no one knew who was going to be where so you either pick a line and hope for the best or find one of the booths with a sign. The first line I saw had Eve Torres but since I’m meeting her at WrestleCon, I went with Eric Bischoff instead. The line took about 30 minutes, which is a near record for Axxess. Bischoff was a nice guy with a big smile on his face. I told him I wanted to punch him in the face every week he was on WCW and he said that was the whole point. The more I hear/read from Bischoff since he left the business, the more I like him. He really does seem to have mellowed since leaving and that’s great.

Now this was when things got a bit tricky. Word on the street was that HHH, Sting, Shawn Michaels and a host of others would be at this Axxess session unveiling a statue for Ric Flair (there’s one made every year with Bruno Sammartino, Andre the Giant and Dusty Rhodes as the previous names) in a special ceremony. However, no one had any idea about this and since I didn’t want to get in any other line, I kind of walked around and took in some of the other sights.

Aside from Bischoff and Torres, there were booths for Apollo Crews, Curtis Axel (I think)/Mojo Rawley, Ron Simmons/Teddy Long, Jacqueline (her line was almost non-existent), Booker T. (inside the Elimination Chamber), Miz/Maryse (possibly the longest line all night), Bobby Roode/Austin Aries (a close second in length), the Usos and Michael Hayes/Jimmy Garvin (FAR shorter than it should have been).

During the show there were also in-ring matches over at the mini NXT arena. These were mostly cruiserweight matches, though I could see some of Ruby Riot vs. Kimber Lee while waiting in the Bischoff line. Alundra Blayze also appeared and I believe did a Q&A though I couldn’t hear anything asked.

I took in the museum and MY GOODNESS I could spend hours in there. It’s basically a bunch of old photos and gear from wrestlers, mainly focusing on this year’s Hall of Fame inductees and a handful of others. Of course there’s also a section about Wrestlemania with a huge (as in over 6′ tall) poster of each event (these wrap around one wall and most of another).

One of the coolest parts was a collection of memorabilia from Wrestlemania III, including Harley Race’s robe, Andre’s singlet and chairs from the Silverdome. There was also an amazing collection of Ric Flair robes, as well as Charlotte’s from last year and Harley Race’s from Starrcade 1983. This is always one of my favorite parts of Axxess and it didn’t disappoint.

To wrap up the first half of the session, I took in Superstore. That thing is HUGE with probably 30-40 different t-shirt designs for Wrestlemania alone, almost any Funko Pop figure you could ask for and a ton of other stuff (JR’s BBQ products had their own table) for rather ridiculous prices (Wrestlemania shot glass: TEN DOLLARS). If I had the extra cash, I’d have to rent a small car to carry everything out of there.

After getting frisked by the security (I had buttons in my pocket from various tables so CLEARLY I was some kind of a criminal), I kept asking about the Flair statue…..and then I heard the music. The statue unveiling was taking place at 7:50 for some reason and was over in the NXT arena.

Sting, Shawn Michaels, Charlotte, HHH, Ricky Steamboat, Arn Anderson and the Rock N Roll Express plus a few others with their backs to the camera were there. HHH actually cried while introducing Ric, which was amusing as apparently he and Shawn had a bet on whether or not HHH could make Flair cry (HHH: “It’s not really that big of a challenge!”). I managed to get into the stands and shot a video of it and it was actually an emotional moment.

I apologize for the video quality.  I was shooting from an iPod and there were WAY too many people crammed into the space.  People kept having to get by me and I bent my glasses so it was really hard to see.

After that (with Flair talking about how much he loved Orlando and thanking Shawn for wrestling himself in their match here nine years ago), I ran over to the Elimination Chamber as there were at least 100 people watching the segment in the ring. The new people inside this time: Hillbilly Jim (who I met last year) and Jimmy Hart (who I met yesterday). They’re both cool but WHAT THE HECK DO THEY HAVE TO DO WITH THE ELIMINATION CHAMBER???? Last year it was Ted DiBiase and now these two? Who thinks this stuff up?

Anyway, while I was in line, the Usos, Teddy Long, Bischoff, Luke Harper and Kalisto all walked by for the change to the next session. Randy Orton, flanked by event staffers, came out for his VIP session as well. After they all went, Curtis Axel came and I got a quick high five. I got back in line and Mojo Rawley came by as well.

This was noteworthy as he stopped and talked to, shook hands with, took pictures with or signed autographs for EVERY SINGLE PERSON on the railing (plus more who came up)for a stand he wasn’t even involved with. He even knelt down and talked to a kid for at least a minute. I don’t ever remember seeing someone taking that much time to just see the fans as it took the better part of five minutes for him to walk twenty feet. That gave me a new found respect for him as he really seemed to have a good time doing this and that’s so rare these days. Well done Mojo.

Then I got inside the Chamber and……yeah the wrestlers are right when they say it’s intimidating. You really do feel something change when you walk in and I didn’t even have the door slammed behind me. Hillbilly Jim said he remembered me from last year, which is a really cool thing to hear. I also got to go inside a pod and then touch a WWE rope and turnbuckle (always wanted to do that). Also, the new floor outside the ring is VERY padded, to the point where I stumbled out of surprise the first time I stepped on it.

Also of note, while I was in line, the Rock N Roll Express were doing a Q&A in the NXT ring. They were asked which current team they wanted to face and Ricky eventually said something about wanting to face Jeff Hardy. The DELETE chants immediately started up but more than that, I was surprised that he was allowed to be mentioned. Maybe Ricky didn’t get the memo, or maybe he knows something about a signing and impending debut.

The event was winding up so I walked around to see what other booths were around. That gave me Kalisto (short line), Nia Jax (Nee-Uh Jakes according to the attendant. Nia’s line was INCREDIBLY long, to the point where I thought it was Nikki Bella at first. That was quite the surprise.), Jim Cornette (not a bad line), Anderson and Gallows (long line), Mick Foley (REALLY long line, pretty easily the longest of the second session), Luke Harper, Heath Slater and Rhyno (longer than you would expect) and Ascension (short line, maybe the shortest all night).

That left one option for my final line of the night: the Revival. After nearly an hour in a rather short line, I got to meet both guys and was rather surprised at Wilder’s charisma. I told them that they had really grown on me (true) as I didn’t think much of them at first and then they turned into one of my favorite acts in NXT. Wilder’s response when I said I didn’t like them at first: “And then you realized you were crazy because WE’RE AWESOME!” I threw in that it was like watching the Andersons (Revival calls them huge inspirations, which is really easy to see) and Wilder said they were, but better. I’m not sure about that but they’re very good.

Overall, the event was a good deal of fun, mainly because of the MUCH smaller than usual crowd. Last year the event was so packed that it was almost impossible to really move around and enjoy the place. Save for the insane food prices (cheese steak and Gatorade: $15.50), I don’t have a ton of complaints. You’re never going to find a way around the long lines and issues over the entrances. I’d easily go again and likely will next year.

Big Austin. There’s a big Undertaker just around the corner of the entrance and…..nothing other than those two.

I think this means I’m the new WCW TV Champion with options to be powerbombed by Kevin Nash on an upcoming Nitro.

From left to right: Sting, Ricky Morton, Shawn Michaels (HHH behind Shawn), Ricky Steamboat (Arn Anderson behind Steamboat), Stephanie McMahon (you knew she would be there), Robert Gibson, Ric Flair with his back to the camera on the right of the statue. Charlotte was to Flair’s right.

The guy who was looking at my iPod while I took the picture told me this looked fine.

Old school. Like the Muppets.

So three Jim’s walk into a Chamber….

I’ll never top this as a wrestling fan.  Ever.

Signed 30 years to the day.

Taken while a Hart Foundation match with Jimmy managing was playing on a TV just over my left shoulder.  He seemed rather excited.

XWF Episode #1
Date: November 13, 2001
Location: Universal Studios, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jerry Lawler
Hosts: Jimmy Hart, Brian Knobbs

This is another one I doubt you’ve heard of. Basically about seven months after WCW and ECW folded, Jimmy Hart, Greg Valentine and Brian Knobbs signed up the talent to start a family friendly wrestling promotion to give the guys another place to work. They taped ten TV shows over a two day period but the shows never aired on TV due to Vince signing up a lot of the roster.

The World Wrestling All-Stars would take some of these guys before TNA became a real home for them. These matches are from a three disc DVD set called the Lost Episodes of the XWF. I believe these were supposed to be TV episodes but there’s a chance they’re just random matches thrown together with other clips edited in to add a story. It could be interesting though so let’s get to it.

Before anyone asks, the X stands for either the X-Factor of wrestling, Xcitement or Xtreme depending on who you ask. Also yes, this is the same arena that TNA uses as the Impact Zone.

Since this is a DVD release, Brian Knobbs and Jimmy Hart tell us the company’s backstory. They emphasize that the company was never meant to compete with the WWE but rather to offer an alternative. Their motto was No More Prima Donnas, so they immediately went after Hulk Hogan.

Hulk Hogan is excited to be here and rips his shirt off to prove it.

After a generic rock song intro, Gene Okerlund talks to us about how exciting this is.

Tony introduces us to Jerry Lawler as his surprise commentary partner. The Jerry Lawler Fan Club sign over Tony’s shoulder kind of spoiled things.

The production values are somewhere between mediocre and good with a well built stage but bad lighting.

An old looking Okerlund is in the ring to introduce CEO Rena Mero (Sable) who is nearly falling out of her low cut dress. She gives us the usual WE ARE THE FUTURE AND ALL ABOUT THE WRESTLERS speech that every wrestling promotion gives on its first show. Sable is glad to be here but the board has decided we need a commissioner: Roddy Piper.

We get Piper’s traditional over the top speech about how many of his friends have been ruined by this business and how glad he is that this place is about the wrestlers. We hear about some of the stars of this place: Jimmy Snuka and Greg Valentine. This is going to be a LONG night isn’t it? Piper is glad to have a beautiful lady working with him. She can deal with the money while he deals with the wrestlers. It’s an independence day for wrestling.

Gene Simmons of KISS is with the Demon of WCW 2000 fame. Ok then.

Big Vito vs. Buff Bagwell

The first bell rings nearly fifteen minutes into this show. Before the match we get comments from the Nasty Boys: “We’re back!” End of comments. Vito jumps Bagwell to start as Tony confirms this is the debut TV episode (which never aired). Bagwell escapes some choking to come back with armdrags and dropkicks. At least we have a somewhat clear face.

The fans think Bagwell sucks though so who knows what’s going on here. Vito comes back with a boot to the face and a side slam for two but Buff scores with right hands and a backdrop. Bagwell responds to the chants and basically does a mid-match heel turn which isn’t something you see that often. The Blockbuster is broken up with an old fashioned crotching to set up a Vito superplex for two. Not that it matters as the Blockbuster connects for the pin for Buff a few seconds later.

Rating: D. This immediately shows the problem with shows like this (aside from the match being Buff Bagwell vs. Big Vito of course): there’s no story, meaning the match is just two guys doing moves to each other for four minutes. The crowd reactions were interesting as the fans decided they liked Vito instead of Bagwell, but they weren’t enough to make me care about a boring match.

A bunch of cruiserweights go to Roddy Piper’s office and want a chance. Their chance is in a battle royal (with pins and submissions) tonight to become the first Cruiserweight Champion. Great to see those little guys getting their shot.

Marty Jannetty vs. Hail

Hale is a big muscular guy that hung around WCW for years but never did anything. Hail shoves him around to start, hits a weak backbreaker and drops a leg for the pin in less than two minutes.

Maximum Force (Simon and Swinger with Dawn Marie from ECW) will be in our face.

Drezden is coming.

Horace Hogan vs. Ian Harrison

Harrison is a huge muscle guy (notice a theme tonight?) from England. Horace pounds away in the corner but can’t whip him across the ring. Harrison comes back with a powerslam (by a strong guy from Leeds, England who comes out to Rule Britannia? They’re not even hiding the stolen ideas now) and some shots to the head. A bad looking overhead suplex sets up a triangle choke to make Horace tap out.

Johnny B. Badd is back. Egads they thought this was going to be a big deal?

Jimmy Hart and Brian Knobbs hype up the battle royal.

Cruiserweight Title: Battle Royal

Psychosis, Billy Fives, AJ Styles, Juventud Guerrera, Tongan Prince, Quick Kick, Kid Kash, Christopher Daniels

No one gets an entrance and you can be eliminated by pinfall, submission or over the top. Tongan Prince is Prince Iaukea and Quick Kick is Low Ki (they might as well have just called him that all the time. It makes more sense). Daniels has short blonde hair here. It’s a big brawl to start with everyone going after everyone and Tony having no idea who half of these guys are. Styles dumps Billy Fives as Josh Matthews (yes THAT Josh Matthews) is sitting in the crowd. Psychosis is dumped and AJ is LAUNCHED over the top onto Psychosis and Fives.

Low Ki hits some loud kicks to Kash’s head as Daniels kicks Iaukea down in the corner. They trade off with Kash and Low Ki going up top, only to miss stereo dives and collide (kind of) in midair. Daniels and Iaukea try to get in cheap shots but clothesline each other down. Low Ki misses a charge and eliminates himself before Kash (Krash according to Tony) hurricanranas Iaukea out. Kash’s tornado DDT mostly doesn’t connect but it staggers Daniels enough that Kash can hit a springboard kick to eliminate him for the title.

Rating: D. If you ever want an example of a spot fest, this is where you would look. Nothing more to say than that.

Kash invites Josh Matthews to hang out with him in the back. This was right after Matthews had lost the inaugural Tough Enough.

Alice Cooper likes the XWF.

There are XWF Girls. Ok then.

Nasty Boys vs. Shane Twins

You might remember the Shane Twins as the Gymini from 2006 Smackdown. If not, picture twin Rybacks named Todd and Mike. What appears to be a 350lb or so Sags elbows Todd into the Pit Stop from Knobbs. Todd comes back with some suplexes before tagging in Mike. A double flapjack gets two on Knobbs and everything breaks down. Sags is sent to the floor as Knobbs beats on Mike in the corner, only to charge into a clothesline to give the Shanes what is supposed to be an upset win.

The Road Warriors come out to chase the Nastys off and issue them a challenge.

Jim Duggan is on Willie Nelson’s tour bus….and that’s all for that scene.

Vampiro talks about getting shortchanged over the years.

Vampiro vs. Curt Hennig

Hennig has an agent by the name of Bobby Heenan, who does Curt’s entrance as only he could. Vampiro hits a quick kick to the chest to start and follows Hennig into the corner with a clothesline. Heenan talks to his client on the floor and it’s Curt coming back with knee lifts and chops in the ring. The neck snap keeps Vampiro in trouble but he comes back with a belly to back suplex and a top rope spinwheel kick for two. Heenan loads up a foreign object but Piper is out maybe half a second later to take it away and blast Hennig. The Nail in the Coffin ends Hennig in less than three minutes.

Sable, Piper and Vampiro pose to end the show.

Knobbs and Hart dedicate the show to the late Hennig and Hawk. Egads what a horrid tribute.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh this is bad. I understand what they were going for here but it bombed badly. This is something that might possibly have a chance of surviving in modern times with video on demand or a DVD release, but having all these guys who were way past their primes at this point with not great production values wasn’t going to work. The longest match was maybe five minutes long and there were no stories anywhere in sight until the very end. I’d give this promotion a month if this had been the pilot episode, but maybe the next two will get better.

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Monday Nitro #9
Date: October 30, 1995
Location: Hara Arena, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Steve McMichael, Bobby Heenan

Well we’re FINALLY done with Halloween Havoc and the main result is Giant is the NEW world champion through various nefarious means. Namely, Jimmy Hart turned on Hogan and Giant won by DQ, which was put into the contract that he could win the title by disqualification. We begin the road to World War 3 and ultimately Starrcade, neither of which were good at all. Let’s get to it.

Mongo’s dog is dressed like a witch. Shoot me now. The announcers recap the show last night and talk about Savage being hurt and Eddie is replacing him. And here’s that match now.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Craig Pittman

I’m still trying to figure out if Pittman is face or heel. I think face but I’m not sure either way. They start REALLY slowly with no actual contact for a long time. Can we like, do something? The fans are way behind Eddie and he would start getting a small push because of it. Bischoff starts the World War 3 push which will of course continue for the next four weeks.

Eddie takes over a bit as Eric talks about how confused Pittman must be since he was supposed to fight Savage. Eddie pinning Pittman is an upset apparently. That’s not something you hear that often. Pittman goes for the arm which is where his finisher would wind up so at least there’s logic there. I wonder if they’ll talk about Giant falling off the roof. They kind of hint at it but haven’t said anything point blank yet.

We’re not sure if Giant is champion or not. He would be declared champion but next week it’s vacated and held up in the battle royal so maybe that has something to do with it. That made no sense but I think you get the idea. Pittman is mostly dominating here until Eddie gets a rollup leverage move out of NOWHERE for the pin which is a shock I guess.

Rating: C+. Not bad here as Eddie’s push if you want to call it that begins here. This was fine for what it was and Pittman more or less left after this so there’s always that as a benefit. Nothing great here but for about five minutes it’s fine. Eddie would be in the final ten in the battle royal, so if nothing else they pushed him that way.

We recap Shark vs. Norton from 6 weeks ago which restarted in a fight last week since they spent five weeks waiting to start the feud again.

Scott Norton vs. Shark

Please make it short. They lock up immediately and the commentary is just like the commentary for the monster truck stuff last night. Heenan has left for no apparent reason and the others don’t seem to care. Top rope shoulder block sends Tenta to the corner and FINALLY he goes down after a regular one. Heenan is seen sitting with a Japanese promoter and eating sushi. That’s the main angle for Starrcade of all things. They brawl to the floor and it’s a double countout.

Rating: N/A. What a GREAT blowoff to this “feud” as no one cared about these two at all and it never went anywhere at all. At least it’s short here. Thankfully they brawl to the back and we got some nice bumps out of it but this was barely a match at all so as usual no grade for it.

Heenan takes some money from the Japanese guy (Sonny Onoo who isn’t named yet).

We see some stills of the Horsemen reformation match last night as Flair pretended to get beaten down which I never really got. Why bring Sting into it other than because they could? Is that why they did it? That makes some sort of sense I guess.

Tony brings out Flair, Pillman and Anderson to explain some stuff. Pillman rants about how we’re getting close to the Horsemen returning and how awesome they are. Anderson says Sting has nothing to be ashamed of since he survived two Horsemen for ten minutes which is insane. The fourth is coming apparently and I think that was Benoit. Flair does his usual rant and says if Sting wants them they’ll be at Nitro next week.

Sabu vs. Disco Inferno

Here’s a strange pairing. Next week it’s viewer’s choice somehow. There will be two groups of wrestlers and you pick the matches. That’s kind of cool I guess. Heenan is back now and talks about the Braves being the world champions. We also hear about the Olympics coming soon. I think this is Disco’s TV debut. All Sabu to start with random off the top stuff. When he didn’t have the tables and ladders etc he was very watchable and enjoyable at times.

Disco comes back with really basic stuff as he was even more of a joke at this point than he was later on. The fans chant for Sabu as I think this was an ECW town, so that makes sense. Disco’s offense lasts like a minute as Sabu is like boy please and the somersault legdrop ends it. Sabu puts him through a table afterwards. Well he tries to since the table doesn’t break.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all as Sabu was still something totally freaky at the time and no one was like him. Rey wouldn’t debut for like 9 months so Sabu was very cool and new still. This went nowhere but it was a fun little squash. It’s interesting to think where Sabu could have gone in WCW had they not thrown him out.

Lex Luger/Meng vs. American Males

Luger is more or less an associate of the Dungeon of Doom now which makes him the traitor, surprising very few people. The Males are former tag champions here and are likely about to get squashed beyond belief. The faces dominate to start actually which isn’t what I expected. Riggs beats on Luger which gets lots of cheering from the Hogan worshipping Bischoff.

Meng interferes and it’s Luger in charge. The fans want Hogan who is still champion apparently. Bischoff is reaching JR levels of fanboy as even Mongo gets on him. Bagwell gets the hot tag and actually beats up Luger for awhile. Meng takes care of that though and the Rack ends it.

Rating: D. Another weak match but the idea is to set up the whole Luger is evil thing and that’s it. The Males got a lot more offense in than I expected here. Nothing good at all though and at least it’s over. That’s your main event mind you. Just keep in mind: this is DEFINITELY better than Raw. Yep it’s true and you know it. OR at least Uncle Eric says so.

We reair the ending of Havoc last night and the Hart heel turn. It is interesting to think that the Yeti was just standing in the back in full mummy attire. It’s Reese from the Flock if you remember them.

The Dungeon is in the ring and Giant has the title. Jimmy says that he was the evil in Hogan’s heart. Luger says he liked the image of Hogan and Savage laying there. Taskmaster acts like Hogan shaking on the mat like he was known to do. Giant says he’ll defend the title. Taskmaster says everyone hates Hogan.

Overall Rating: C-. Decent stuff this week but more than anything else it’s nice to not be building to Havoc anymore. We weren’t quite to a PPV a month yet but it was very soon. This was a transitional show as it was fallout from the previous night and the build to World War 3 hadn’t begun yet. That would be next week, which might be reviewed relatively soon since these are really easy to blow through. Not bad but nothing great here.

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Hart Foundation
Host: Craig DeGeorge
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

This is something I haven’t done in a good while: an old Coliseum Video. The tape is exactly what it sounds like: a profile on the Hart Foundation featuring matches and interviews. I guess I can force myself to sit through an hour and forty minutes of one of the best tag teams ever. Let’s get to it.

In case you’re REALLY new at this, the Hart Foundation (the Harts) are Bret the Hitman Hart and Jim the Anvil Neidhart.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. British Bulldogs

This is barely even a match as it’s more important for referee Danny Davis using some very questionable tactics, including going to the floor as Smith has Neidhart covered. The Harts hit a double DDT on Smith as Davis is on the floor, followed by the Hart Attack and a fast count to give the Harts the belts. Davis had been teasing a heel turn forever but this finally cemented it and got the Harts rolling. The whole thing was less than three minutes from bell to bell.

We now jump back in time a bit, as is the custom with almost all of these tapes.

Hart Foundation vs. Rougeau Brothers

This is from MSG on September 22, 1986 and is the Rougeaus’ MSG debut. We’re joined in progress but it doesn’t seem to be that long. Bret cranks on Jacques’ arm to start but Jacques takes over before flipping over Bret’s back into a dropkick to send Hart to the floor. Off to Ray for a headlock and a dropkick of his own to send Bret back to the floor. The Harts huddle in the aisle before it’s off to Jacques vs. Anvil.

Jacques can’t budge the big Anvil so Neidhart just strokes his beard and says bring it. Neidhart tries a shoulder but Jacques jumps over him and catches Jim in a slam. Bret breaks up a Boston crab attempt and it’s Jacques in trouble. The Harts hit something resembling the Demolition Decapitator for two as the crowd is still into this. Jacques is sent to the floor where Bret drops him face first on a chair because that’s the kind of guy he is.

Back inside and we hit the chinlock from Bret for a second before Jacques comes back with a monkey flip. Neidhart comes back in for a front facelock and Bret comes in to break up a tag attempt. Jacques tries to speed things up but gets caught with a knee in the back to put him down. Neidhart ducks a spinning cross body as Jacques is still in trouble. Back to Bret who puts on a front facelock of his own but it’s Neidhart coming in to distract the referee so he misses the tag to Ray.

Bret ties Jacques in the ropes for a cross body but the middle rope elbow misses. Neidhart can’t prevent the tag this time and it’s off to Ray to speed things up. After some of the house is cleaned Ray hooks a sleeper on Neidhart, only to have Bret break things up. Everything breaks down and Ray charges into Bret’s boots in the corner. The distraction is enough for Jacques to slingshot in with a sunset flip to pin Neidhart.

Rating: C. This took awhile to get going but it picked up at the end. The Rougeaus were a nice high flying tag team but there wasn’t much to them as far as personality goes. By the time they fixed that problem in the late 80s they had been surpassed by a bunch of teams and injuries caught up to them. Still though, decent match here.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Bret Hart

From Boston on March 8, 1986. Bret doesn’t mean anything yet and Steamboat hasn’t established himself as a master, meaning at this point he’s just good. Apparently Bret picked this match himself over how awesome he thought it was. Bret jumps Steamboat in the corner as Jimmy Hart invades the commentary booth to brag about how awesome Bret is. Steamboat counters a whip to send Bret chest first into the buckle to get himself a breather. The fans are WAY into Steamboat here.

Ricky chops away but stops to go after Jimmy. For once the distraction actually isn’t a problem as he grabs an armbar on Hart. A series of right hands and chops to the arm have Bret in trouble so Steamboat lifts him into the air by the arm to show off a bit. Back up and Ricky speeds things up by sliding through Bret’s legs twice in a row before snapping off a great armdrag to get us back to the armbar. Jimmy talks a lot and in the only time I can remember, Ricky shouts at him to SHUT UP.

Back up again and Steamboat leapfrogs a few times before hiptossing Bret back into the armbar. Bret fights up but walks into a superkick to put him right back down. A spinning neckbreaker FINALLY puts Steamboat down to give Bret some control. Bret stomps at the ribs and pounds away as only he can, including a right hand to the ribs to send Steamboat to the floor. A suplex brings Ricky back in for two.

Off to a headlock by Hart but the fans are right there to cheer Ricky back into things. A clothesline puts Steamboat down again but he slams Hart to get a breather. Ricky’s splash hits knees though and Hart takes control again. They head outside so Bret can hug Jimmy and send Steamboat back first into the apron. Back in and a powerslam gets two on the Dragon but Bret misses the middle rope elbow.

Steamboat suplexes him down for two as both guys are spent. Ricky drives in some shots to the head and shoves the referee away so he can chop at Hart in the corner. The referee gets crushed in the corner before Bret hits the Hart Attack clothesline so there’s no count. Back up again and Bret hits a cross body but Steamboat rolls through for the pin.

Rating: B. Good stuff here but Bret didn’t have anything that would have finished Dragon off. If this was about three years later it could have been a classic but as it is it’s just very good. Steamboat was just so smooth out there and could have a good match with anyone, so if you put him with someone like Hart it’s guaranteed gold.

Hart Foundation/Honky Tonk Man vs. Junkyard Dog/Davey Boy Smith/Tito Santana

Bret is spelled Brett in the pre-match graphics. This is from January 6, 1987 at a Superstars but that dolt DeGeorge says it’s from December of 86. Bret and Davey get us going with Smith shoving Hart around with ease. Davey slams all three heels down with ease and it’s time for a meeting on the floor. Back in and Smith slides through Bret’s knees and gets two off a victory roll.

Off to Honky vs. JYD with the Dog pounding away to the biggest reactions of the match. Neidhart comes in and immediately takes his straps down, only to accidentally hit Honky with a forearm. Off to Tito for right hands and a front facelock before Honky gets the tag. That only lasts for a few seconds before Tito punches him into the corner for a tag off to Bret. We get the required chest bump in the corner from Hart and it’s back to JYD for an armbar.

Neidhart comes in and finally gets a shot in to Dog’s throat to put him down. Honky drops some elbows on Dog before it’s back to Hart to work on the back. A legdrop gets two and we hit the chinlock so Dog can have a breather. Heenan tries to explain that the booing Honky is getting could be for Tito or the Dog, getting a rare chuckle from Gorilla. Dog gets caught in a chinlock but his tag to Santana isn’t seen, allowing Honky to come back in for a chinlock of his own.

Dog fights up again but gets caught in a front facelock from Neidhart. Honky comes back in off an unseen tag to clothesline Dog down for two. A middle rope fist drop misses though and it’s hot tag to Tito. There’s the flying forearm but Anvil makes a quick save. Back to Bret for an atomic drop before they hit head to head. Tito crawls over and brings in Smith as everything breaks down. In a stupid finish, all three heels are whipped into each other out of different corners and the Bulldog pins Hart.

Rating: D. Well the good times on the tape had to end sooner or later. JYD was very over with the crowd but man alive could he drag a match down in a hurry. Way too many chinlocks and rest holds here on top of a stupid finish to make things even worse. Also, for a tape about the Hart Foundation, shouldn’t they win more matches?

We now go to the big piece of the tape: an investigative report at the Hart Foundation headquarters. It’s a big office building with a receptionist and a bunch of awards and plaques on the walls. The receptionist doesn’t know who Gene is so he makes some sexist jokes as is his custom. She winds up showing him around and explaining some of the awards and photos on the wall. Allegedly there are 200 secretaries working for the Foundation. Gene hears someone screaming but the receptionist says she didn’t hear a thing.

The receptionist asks for Gene’s credentials as this is getting stupid in a hurry. Gene is shuffled off to a second receptionist who appears to be a reject from a bad adult film. Back to the first receptionist who doesn’t remember him. Gene gets frustrated and finally goes through a door to find the Harts (including Danny Davis, now a bad wrestler) playing with action figures. Jimmy freaks out and eventually says he’ll answer some questions.

Hart tells the origins of the Hart Foundation, talking about Neidhart being the greatest football player of all time (he never played in any regular season NFL games) and Bret being a scientific master. Jimmy insists that the toys are ACTION figures because girls play with dolls. He also claims that they get cheated in every match they don’t win and a WE DIDN’T LOSE chant breaks out.

Gene suggests that Davis is a crooked referee because his knuckles are red from taking money under the table. Jimmy says pink is awesome as a screaming girl goes running by, but none of the Harts see her. Gene wants to know where their gym equipment is so the receptionists come back in to act as “trainers”. Bret insists that Stu knows about this because he’s here once a month. We’re finally done after almost fifteen minutes of this nonsense.

We now get the Danny Davis Story, which saw him come to the ring to take over as referee for a Tito Santana vs. Rocky Stone (jobber) match but Jack Tunney suspends him for life instead. Tito realizes he can destroy Davis now with no repercussions but Jimmy Hart gets Davis out of the way.

Jimmy welcomes Davis to the Hart Foundation.

Hart Foundation vs. Jerry Allen/Jim Powers

From March 7, 1987 on Superstars, only here to see Davis in wrestling gear for the first time. This is also non-title. Allen throws Bret into the corner to start but gets clotheslined down so it’s off to Neidhart. Bret slingshows Jim in over the top for a splash but Neidhart pulls him up at two. Hart Attack ends this quick.

We get some clips from the six man tag with the Foundation against Tito and the Bulldogs from Wrestlemania 3. All we see is Davis getting DESTROYED by all three guys until a melee saves him and Bret cracks Dynamite with the megaphone to give Davis the fluke pin.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. British Bulldogs

This is from Boston on November 1, 1986 with the Bulldogs defending. Bret shoves Dynamite around to start but Dynamite shoves right back. Kid fights out of the corner and knocks Hart to the floor before coming back in to face Davey. A rollup out of the corner gets two for Hart but he bails to the floor again. Neidhart comes in and gets dropkicked down before being caught in a headlock.

Anvil comes back with a hard slam and pulls Bret in for a slingshot splash for two. The Harts take over on Davey with the fast tags and cheating where they can sneak it in. Bret chokes away in the corner as Jim has the referee before taking Davey to the floor for a slam. Back to Neidhart for a chinlock with a knee in the back before shifting to a front facelock. Bret comes in to break up a hot tag, meaning we have a regular spot from the Harts.

Smith grabs a quick two off a crucifix, only to be stomped down by Bret again. We hit the front facelock again but Bret pulls Smith back to the Hart corner to break up the tag again. Bret hooks a sleeper but Davey fights out and hits a quick press slam, allowing for the hot tag off to Dynamite. The Kid cleans house and hits his snap suplex and a headbutt on Bret.

Hart gets caught in a sleeper but the referee gets taken out by his flailing arms. Neidhart gets in a cheap shot on Dynamite and drags Bret over but it’s only good for two. BIG pop on the kickout there. Anvil slams Dynamite down and puts Bret on top again but Kid kicks out AGAIN. Bulldog gets up and gets an illegal pin on the illegal Anvil to retain the belts.

Rating: B-. Really solid match here with both teams looking great. Those kickouts at the end had the fans going nuts and for good reason. These teams ha incredible chemistry together and again that’s something you can’t teach. The fans always respond to it as well which is all you can ask for.

Bret lays out Dynamite with a piledriver post match.

Tag Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Killer Bees

From MSG on February 23, 1987 with the Harts defending. Bret has said these teams fought each other somewhere between 300-500 times so to say they know each other is an understatement. Anvil starts against Jim Brunzell as Jimmy Hart says Danny Davis has every right to be at ringside. Brunzell cranks on the arm to start so it’s quickly off to Bret. Brunzell can’t get a hiptoss so he opts for a headscissors into a sunset flip for two before cranking on the arm.

It’s off to Brian Blair who gets Bret tied up in the ropes. Jimmy panics as Blair slingshots Bret into Anvil, sending the champions out to the floor. Back in with Brunzell cranking on Bret’s arm before it’s back to Blair for a double elbow to the face. Bret drives Blair into the corner and Anvil takes over with raw power. Back to Bret who gets two off a clothesline and drives a knee into Blair’s ribs. Anvil gets in some blatant cheap shots to the ribs right in front of the referee.

Bret hooks the front facelock and drives Blair back into the corner for some choking from Anvil. Neidhart puts on a chinlock before slamming Blair down for the slingshot splash from Bret. Brian reverses Bret into the corner for the chest bump but Hart is able to drive him back into the corner for the tag off to Neidhart. Blair tries to run the ropes but a Hart knee to the back stops him again.

Neidhart hooks a bearhug before we get the front facelock spot that the Harts have used in every match so far. Bret puts on a reverse chinlock but gets countered into an electric chair to put both guys down. Hot tag brings in Brunzell and house is cleaned. The bell rings for no apparent reason and in the confusion Davis blasts Brunzell, giving Bret the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that’s almost impossible to screw up. The Bees were never very successful but they were fine for spots like this by making the champions look good. Davis was doing what he was supposed to do here as he was never going to be anything of note in the ring.

Overall Rating: B-. Oh come on it’s the Hart Foundation and this isn’t even their best stuff. The good thing about this tape is that it focuses on the tag team and only touches on Davis’ involvement. There’s SO much more they could include if there was a full length DVD made about these guys which is something WWE might want to look into. Good stuff here if you have an hour and a half to kill.

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Wrestlicious Takedown
Date: March 10, 2010
Location: Wrestlicious Studios, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentator: Johnny C.

Oh sweet goodness what am I doing to myself? For those of you unfamiliar, go watch the trailer on Youtube right now. It’s basically the spiritual successor to G.L.O.W., which is known for good looking women and completely campy comedy and women that are “wrestlers”. In this case, it was started by a guy that won a Powerball lottery and used his money on this. Jimmy Hart played a big part in this and I think it’s out of business now. This is the second episode. Let’s get to it.

Oh and the girls are mostly all wrestlers, some of which you’ll know. They’re ALL in very stereotypical and overdone gimmicks which I’m sure you’ll catch on to. There are also comedy skits to go along with the wrestling. The word “studios” means warehouse too.

Jimmy Hart pops up and is worried about being the host and stuck with a bimbo or stick in the mud. Leyla Milani, the runner up in one of the Diva Searches, appears and is the co-host. Oh geez there’s a laugh track.

We do the opening video which is most of the girls in character in front of a personalized screen.

Boot Camp Bailey, the trainer, wants to talk about something. She’s a military themed girl with a VERY short skirt. She says attention a lot and says she’s looking for a few good women. Bailey asks who wants to be a trainee and calls a few “fans” into the ring. One of the girls is the floor manager who has to take her headset off before she gets in. Bailey apparently is a model with no wrestling experience. This is getting LOUDLY booed by the way.

We get a clip from last week of a six girl tag with the Country Cousins vs. the Mexican team/Felony, a prison character. I have no idea what the announcer’s name is. Felony tries to escape during the match. Apparently the commentator’s name is Johnny C. and he has no idea what he’s calling. The Mexican team and Felony won with what looked like a Snow Plow.

There’s going to be a battle royal with the final two facing each other for the Wrestlicious Title.

We go to “the farm” (green screen) with Cousin Cassie and Tyler Texas who do a comedy bit called “You Just Might Be A Down Home Wrestler.” I’m sure you get the idea here.

And now, a game show: Are You Smarter Than A Male Wrestler, hosted by Jimmy Hart. Our contestants are Glory (female wrestler Christie Ricci playing a patriot) and Brian Knobbs. The category is American History and the question is what happened in 1776. Knobbs thinks it’s the first beer drinking contest. Glory gets it right (I guess the signing of the Declaration of Independence was all that happened in America that year)…..and that’s it.

We recap the Bailey segment from like 5 minutes ago.

Now three girls are in a bedroom on a bed. Now they go to make drinks but Bailey stops them. Oh ok they’re the trainees. To be continued. Did I mention we’re almost halfway through the show?

Package on Lacey Von Erich which is her on the beach in swimsuits.

Tony the Top (mob character) says that Autumn Frost (an Ice Princess, whatever that is. You may know her as Jennifer Blake who does indy wrestling and is a somewhat big female star in AAA) should be on JV Rich’s (the owner of the company and owner of a big mansion where comedy bits like this one are shot at) arm. He says she should be on a leash, which gets a HUGE reaction from the laugh track.

Paige Webb (Serena from the Straight Edge Society with hair) answers an e-mail from a male admirer. Included in the e-mail is a picture of his pierced genitals I think.

Three girls are arguing over what to call the aforementioned battle royal. Go vote on their website for the NAME OF THE MATCH. This show is cut into three parts on Youtube and we’re about to start part 3 with no matches.

HOKEY SMOKE A WRESTLING MATCH!

Autumn Frost vs. Paige Webb

Frost is from Alaska so we get a snow effect. Webb is a computer geek. Get it? Johnny C. makes a bunch of bad sex jokes and we’re ready to go. Frost jumps her but gets caught in a full nelson. The commentary is nothing but puns. Literally, it’s all puns and the occasional name of a move. Frost hooks a full nelson of her own but Webb arm drags out of it. Webb hooks the armbar as the announcer talks about how Webb’s box is filled every night. With e-mails of course.

A monkey flip puts Frost down and “the ice girl goeth”. Back in and Frost takes over. I can’t handle or give you an accurate description of the amount of the puns being used here. Apparently Webb needs to reboot from a snow boot. Frost beats her down “like a computer virus.” I’m dying listening to how bad this is.

They do a pinfall reversal sequence and Webb gets caught in a chinlock. Webb comes back with some armdrags and sends Frost to the floor for a beating. Back in a top rope cross body gets two for Webb. After a quick run on the floor, Webb tries a monkey flip but Frost falls on her and puts her feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D+. Both girls are pro wrestlers already so the match wasn’t that bad, but the commentary here is going to make or break the match for you. I kid you not, you won’t go ten seconds without a terrible pun, but if you just give up on the show being serious and enjoy it for how HORRIBLE it is, the commentary will grow on you quickly. The wrestling wasn’t half bad.

We get a preview for next week which is a voodoo chick vs. Madison Rayne as a cheerleader.

Overall Rating: B. Now let me explain. This show is TERRIBLE. There’s about four minutes of wrestling (the show is only half an hour including commercials so it’s not a huge stretch), a TON of bad comedy bits that don’t go anywhere and the commentary is nothing but puns.

HOWEVER, this is the kind of show where if you saw more than four seconds of the previews, you knew exactly what you were getting into. This show knows it’s horrible and it doesn’t try to take itself seriously in the slightest. I found it hilarious with how bad it was and if you go into it with that kind of mindset, you’ll have fun with it. Plus the girls look good so that helps.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

I only remember seeing this twice and it hasn’t happened in over 25 years.Back in 1986, Hulk Hogan and Paul Orndorff had a HUGE feud.  During the course of this, Orndorff started to use Hogan’s legendary Real American song as his own, claiming that he (Orndorff) was the true Real American.

In 1987, the Young Stallions formed and started using a song called Crank It Up.  Jimmy Hart, the writer of the song, was angry because he wanted the Hart Foundation to use it.

Why don’t we see theme music as a feud starter anymore?  I know a lot of the songs are generic and could be interchanged, but given how similar a lot of the feuds are anymore, this is as a good an idea as anything else for getting people not liking each other.

Wrestlicious Takedown
Date: March 10, 2010
Location: Wrestlicious Studios, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentator: Johnny C.

Oh sweet goodness what am I doing to myself? For those of you unfamiliar, go watch the trailer on Youtube right now. It’s basically the spiritual successor to G.L.O.W., which is known for good looking women and completely campy comedy and women that are “wrestlers”. In this case, it was started by a guy that won a Powerball lottery and used his money on this. Jimmy Hart played a big part in this and I think it’s out of business now. This is the second episode. Let’s get to it.

Oh and the girls are mostly all wrestlers, some of which you’ll know. They’re ALL in very stereotypical and overdone gimmicks which I’m sure you’ll catch on to. There are also comedy skits to go along with the wrestling. The word “studios” means warehouse too.

Jimmy Hart pops up and is worried about being the host and stuck with a bimbo or stick in the mud. Leyla Milani, the runner up in one of the Diva Searches, appears and is the co-host. Oh geez there’s a laugh track.

We do the opening video which is most of the girls in character in front of a personalized screen.

Boot Camp Bailey, the trainer, wants to talk about something. She’s a military themed girl with a VERY short skirt. She says attention a lot and says she’s looking for a few good women. Bailey asks who wants to be a trainee and calls a few “fans” into the ring. One of the girls is the floor manager who has to take her headset off before she gets in. Bailey apparently is a model with no wrestling experience. This is getting LOUDLY booed by the way.

We get a clip from last week of a six girl tag with the Country Cousins vs. the Mexican team/Felony, a prison character. I have no idea what the announcer’s name is. Felony tries to escape during the match. Apparently the commentator’s name is Johnny C. and he has no idea what he’s calling. The Mexican team and Felony won with what looked like a Snow Plow.

There’s going to be a battle royal with the final two facing each other for the Wrestlicious Title.

We go to “the farm” (green screen) with Cousin Cassie and Tyler Texas who do a comedy bit called “You Just Might Be A Down Home Wrestler.” I’m sure you get the idea here.

And now, a game show: Are You Smarter Than A Male Wrestler, hosted by Jimmy Hart. Our contestants are Glory (female wrestler Christie Ricci playing a patriot) and Brian Knobbs. The category is American History and the question is what happened in 1776. Knobbs thinks it’s the first beer drinking contest. Glory gets it right (I guess the signing of the Declaration of Independence was all that happened in America that year)…..and that’s it.

We recap the Bailey segment from like 5 minutes ago.

Now three girls are in a bedroom on a bed. Now they go to make drinks but Bailey stops them. Oh ok they’re the trainees. To be continued. Did I mention we’re almost halfway through the show?

Package on Lacey Von Erich which is her on the beach in swimsuits.

Tony the Top (mob character) says that Autumn Frost (an Ice Princess, whatever that is. You may know her as Jennifer Blake who does indy wrestling and is a somewhat big female star in AAA) should be on JV Rich’s (the owner of the company and owner of a big mansion where comedy bits like this one are shot at) arm. He says she should be on a leash, which gets a HUGE reaction from the laugh track.

Paige Webb (Serena from the Straight Edge Society with hair) answers an e-mail from a male admirer. Included in the e-mail is a picture of his pierced genitals I think.

Three girls are arguing over what to call the aforementioned battle royal. Go vote on their website for the NAME OF THE MATCH. This show is cut into three parts on Youtube and we’re about to start part 3 with no matches.

HOKEY SMOKE A WRESTLING MATCH!

Autumn Frost vs. Paige Webb

Frost is from Alaska so we get a snow effect. Webb is a computer geek. Get it? Johnny C. makes a bunch of bad sex jokes and we’re ready to go. Frost jumps her but gets caught in a full nelson. The commentary is nothing but puns. Literally, it’s all puns and the occasional name of a move. Frost hooks a full nelson of her own but Webb arm drags out of it. Webb hooks the armbar as the announcer talks about how Webb’s box is filled every night. With e-mails of course.

A monkey flip puts Frost down and “the ice girl goeth”. Back in and Frost takes over. I can’t handle or give you an accurate description of the amount of the puns being used here. Apparently Webb needs to reboot from a snow boot. Frost beats her down “like a computer virus.” I’m dying listening to how bad this is.

They do a pinfall reversal sequence and Webb gets caught in a chinlock. Webb comes back with some armdrags and sends Frost to the floor for a beating. Back in a top rope cross body gets two for Webb. After a quick run on the floor, Webb tries a monkey flip but Frost falls on her and puts her feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D+. Both girls are pro wrestlers already so the match wasn’t that bad, but the commentary here is going to make or break the match for you. I kid you not, you won’t go ten seconds without a terrible pun, but if you just give up on the show being serious and enjoy it for how HORRIBLE it is, the commentary will grow on you quickly. The wrestling wasn’t half bad.

We get a preview for next week which is a voodoo chick vs. Madison Rayne as a cheerleader.

Overall Rating: B. Now let me explain. This show is TERRIBLE. There’s about four minutes of wrestling (the show is only half an hour including commercials so it’s not a huge stretch), a TON of bad comedy bits that don’t go anywhere and the commentary is nothing but puns.

HOWEVER, this is the kind of show where if you saw more than four seconds of the previews, you knew exactly what you were getting into. This show knows it’s horrible and it doesn’t try to take itself seriously in the slightest. I found it hilarious with how bad it was and if you go into it with that kind of mindset, you’ll have fun with it. Plus the girls look good so that helps.

Remember to like this on Facebook and follow me on Twitter @kbreviews