Smackdown
Date: August 22, 2008
Location: iWireless Arena, Moline, Illinois
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

Summerslam has come and gone and the big story is that Undertaker destroyed Edge inside the Cell, which should get rid of him for a good while. Other than that, HHH dispatched the Great Khali in a match that was better than expected, meaning he’s going to need a new challenger. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

We open with a look at the Smackdown matches from Summerslam.

Opening sequence.

Vickie Guerrero welcomes us to the show and says we haven’t been seeing the real her in recent weeks. Everything she has done has been because of Edge, because she corrupted who she was as a person. Now she is free to be her real self with Edge stuck in the same h*** he put her in. She has made some changes, and one of the things she feels the best about is reinstating the Undertaker. Another thing is the Championship Scramble at Unforgiven, which will see five people wrestling for twenty minutes with unlimited falls. Whoever gets the last fall will be WWE Champion. Tonight, we find out the competitors.

Maria vs. Natalya

Natalya fireman’s carries her down without much trouble to start but Maria reverses into a headlock. Back up and they fight over wrist control until Maria snaps off a snappy armdrag. Some kicks to the leg don’t work very well though as Natalya is back with a dragon screw legwhip. Natalya cranks on the leg until Maria fights up and hits some clotheslines. A Bronco Buster gets the fans a bit more interested…and here is Maryse to go after Maria for the DQ.

Rating: C-. This was little more than a few moves going on until the ending, which just kind of happened. Maria feels more and more like the Smackdown version of Kelly Kelly, who is the young, up and coming star who needs a lot more experience. The potential is there, but Maria is going to need some more time before it happens.

Post match the beatdown is on but Michelle McCool comes in for the save.

La Familia runs into the Big Show, who talks to Vickie Guerrero like a child. He’s happy for the Championship Scramble and he’s ready to face anyone in a qualifying match….but Vickie forgot to put him in one.

Championship Scramble Qualifying Match: Battle Royal

Scotty Goldman, Super Crazy, Armando Estrada, Funaki, Brian Kendrick, Curt Hawkins, Brian Kendrick, Jimmy Wang Yang, Vladimir Kozlov, Ryan Braddock

Big Show is sitting at ringside and this is one of the lamest battle royals I’ve ever seen. A bunch of people get together and toss Kozlov before Goldman is sent out as well. Then Show comes in and tosses most of the people, with Ezekiel Jackson saving Brian Kendrick…which is enough for Kendrick to win, as Show threw everyone else out and then stepped over the top (as apparently he was in).

Rating: D+. The match was barely a thing but points for a clever ending. I guess I’ll take this over another one off match with little in the way of drama, but this was more of a joke than anything else. That being said, they got through it quickly and Kendrick being in the title match is more interesting than most options.

Post match Kendrick does a victory dance for a nice touch.

R-Truth talks about how the truth is what you do when people aren’t watching. It’s about respecting who you are and getting better every day to build a better future. He’s been on the bottom but now he’s heading for the top.

Championship Scramble Qualifying Match: MVP vs. Festus

Jesse is here with Festus. Before the match, we hear from MVP at Summerslam, where he promises to win the WWE Title. Festus freaks out at the bell but MVP knocks him into the corner anyway. A suplex sends MVP down for two and a clothesline is good for the same. Festus fall away slams him into the corner, only for MVP to pull him into the post. The logical armbar goes on and MVP cranks away, with Festus finally fighting up.

Some fight hands connect while the left arm is left hanging but the bad arm is sent into the corner again. MVP cranks on the arm again….as we see a sign saying “I Love My Mommy And Grandma.” Well that’s just sweet. Festus fights up again and hits a running elbow, setting up something like a running seated senton. A big boot sends MVP outside, where he kicks Jesse in the face. That’s enough of a distraction for Festus to get counted out. Oddly there’s a delay between the ten count and MVP being declared the winner, with MVP’s music starting before the bell rings, making for a bit of a weird situation.

Rating: C-. It’s kind of odd to go with two fairly screwy endings in a row, especially when it’s a star like MVP against Festus, who is almost a novelty. Obviously it’s the right result, but you would think there would be a better way to go than a bunch of sitting around pulling on Festus’ arm. Pretty dull match here, with MVP being capable of better.

Post match the bell turns Festus off again so MVP boots him out to the floor.

Classic On Demand: Trish Stratus b. Stacy Keibler in a swimsuit contest. Same exact clip from Raw.

Championship Scramble Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Finlay

Non-title and Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Before the match, Benjamin talks about how being a champion is about being obsessed with gold. He doesn’t like Olympic phenom Michael Phelps being called the new Gold Standard, because there is only one of them. Finlay wastes no time in taking Benjamin down for some face ripping before driving him into the corner.

A headlock grinds Benjamin down a bit so he bails into the corner for a needed breather. Back up and Benjamin tries to go low on Finlay, who takes him out to the floor where a lot of seething can ensue. They go back inside where Finlay can crank on the leg a bit, with Benjamin going to the ropes. A missed charge sends Finlay shoulder first into the post, giving Benjamin a rather nice target. The chinlock with a bodyscissors goes on, followed by one heck of a kick to the back of the head to have Finlay curled up in the corner.

Finlay bails to the floor for a second, where he ties a sliding Benjamin up in the ring skirt for some clubberin. Benjamin knocks him back into the apron though and we take a break. Back with Benjamin working on a neck crank Finlay jawbreaks his way to freedom for two but Benjamin grabs the neck again. Back up again and Benjamin hits a dragon whip, followed by the t-bone to cut Finlay down again for a delayed two. Finlay fights up but here is Mike Knox to go after Hornswoggle, allowing Benjamin to grab Paydirt for the fast pin.

Rating: C. They went pretty long here until the ending, which was more about setting up Knox vs. Finlay in an ECW feud. They could have done the same match in less time and things would have been that much better. Benjamin getting the nod is fine as it isn’t like he’s doing anything important with the US Title.

Post match Knox beats up Finlay a bit more.

We look back at Chris Jericho punching Shawn Michaels’ wife at Summerslam.

La Familia isn’t sure why Undertaker hasn’t arrived yet. Chavo Guerrero thinks he might even be holding a grudge. Maybe Vickie Guerrero should apologize?

Championship Scramble Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Great Khali

HHH is on commentary. Hardy slugs away to start but is quickly knocked outside for his efforts. Back in and Khali stomps away before the nerve hold goes on. With Hardy ground down, the tree slam is loaded up (HHH looks nervous) but Hardy goes up to slip out. That earns him a chop out to the floor but Hardy is back in with a Twist of Fate. The Swanton is loaded up but Runjin Singh offers a distraction (Khali was about 80% of the way across the ring so that thing wasn’t coming close anyway). HHH isn’t having this and pulls him down before chairing Khali in the head. The Whisper in the Wind into the Swanton finishes for Hardy.

Rating: C. I’m hoping HHH has to deal with Khali again, as that was quite the heelish move for someone who was just trying to protect his title. Hardy is one of the hottest things in WWE at the moment so he almost had to be in the title match. It also wouldn’t have been the best idea to ask Khali to go for twenty minutes, so there wasn’t much of a choice to be made here.

Post break HHH is in the ring to talk about the challengers coming for the title in the Championship Scramble. The fifth person in that match is a 12 time World Champion and someone who has won everything in every kind of match. Cue Kenny Dkysktra to interrupt because he should be in the match too. The Pedigree lays him out in a hurry, with HHH saying it was good to see him.

Here is La Familia to offer an apology to Undertaker, complete with a standing ovation. Cue Undertaker, with Vickie (eventually) saying she gave Undertaker a chance for revenge on Edge at Summerslam and now she wants a chance to be forgiven. If Undertaker needs more time, they can do this next week and she even gets on her knees to beg him. Undertaker says “look at me woman” because he isn’t here for an apology, but rather Vickie’s soul. The fight is on with Undertaker getting beaten down for a bit, only to fight up and clean house. Undertaker does the throat slit to Vickie to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I do appreciate a show with a central theme running throughout, but this wasn’t their best effort. The qualifying matches set up a nice field for Unforgiven, but it would have been nice to have them be a bit less dull. The ending with Undertaker hunting Vickie isn’t the most thrilling thing either and feels like something rather simple and not that interesting. This show set up the one match at Unforgiven but it didn’t have me wanting to see anything until then.

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Smackdown
Date: August 8, 2008
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We are just over a week away from Summerslam and Edge is hopefully getting back on track. That is something he has been needing for a bit and it might have happened last week. In another thing that needs to pick up the pace, we have HHH vs. Great Khali for the former’s World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Edge snapping on Mick Foley last week.

Opening sequence.

Tazz is filling in for the injured Mick Foley. Commentary runs down the card.

Maryse/Natalya/Victoria vs. Maria/Michelle McCool/Cherry

They’re all in various Olympic sports attire, though Maria picks skiing for the summer games. McCool (volleyball) and Natalya (equestrian) start things off with McCool gabbing a Russian legsweep. A middle rope wristdrag takes Natalya down but Maria tags herself in for a double shoulder. Natalya sends Maria outside but Cherry (boxing) comes in with a double arm DDT. It’s off to Victoria for the Widow’s Peak, only for McCool to kick her in the face. Everything breaks down and Natalya Sharpshooters Maria for the fast win. This was a mini theme match and you can pretty easily get the reason why.

Bam Neely has been attacked and there is a black rose near him.

Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins vs. Shannon Moore/Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Hawkins headlocks Yang to start but gets armdragged into an armbar. Back up and Hawkins fights out of the corner and hits a reverse clothesline, allowing Ryder to come in for a swinging neckbreaker. Hawkins comes in off a blind tag and breaks up a sunset flip, setting up a suplex for two on Yang. We hit the reverse chinlock but Yang slips out and hands it back to Moore to clean house. A high crossbody gets two on Ryder but the referee has to get rid of Yang, allowing a double inverted DDT to finish Moore.

Rating: C+. I’ve long since thought Yang and Moore could have been a bigger deal in the tag division as it isn’t like there was much competition. They had a nice match here and it made for a good use of a few minutes. If nothing else, it made the champions look good, which is always a nice move.

MVP wants to face Jeff Hardy at Summerslam. We see a clip of MVP costing Jeff Hardy a match against Edge on Saturday Night’s Main Event, but where is the footage of Hardy attacking MVP? Hardy is a product of his own actions.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Benjamin takes him down without much trouble and grabs an early chinlock. Hardy fights up and it’s an armdrag into an armbar as they already see to be filling time. That’s broken up and Benjamin stomps away in the corner before going back to the chinlock. This one doesn’t last as long as Hardy fights up and hits the mule kick out to the floor, where the slingshot dive connects. Back in and a quick Swanton attempt misses to give Benjamin two and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin grabbing another chinlock, though at least his legs are facing another way to make it different. Back up and Hardy tries the Whisper In The Wind, only to get dropped hard onto the ropes for two. Benjamin starts in on the leg as Tazz talks about fatigue setting in. From what? Excessive chinlock usage? Benjamin starts cranking on the leg, including a half crab for a change.

That’s broken up so Benjamin puts it on again as we’re seeing quite the repetitive theme emerging. Hardy escapes again and they go outside, where Benjamin gets kicked out of the air. Back in and the Whisper In The Wind connects, only for Benjamin to reverse the slingshot dropkick into a powerslam for two. Paydirt is countered into the Twist Of Fate and Hardy hits the Swanton…but gets kicked in the face by MVP for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This got going near the end but they easily could have cut off about five minutes o the chinlocks and leg cranking. The latter wouldn’t have made much of a difference as Hardy’s leg looked fine when he was making his comeback. This wasn’t quite as bad as some of the recent dull matches, but it was definitely following a similar formula.

La Familia can’t find Zack Ryder and something might have happened to him.

And now, arm wrestling between HHH and Great Khali, with broken glass on the table for whichever hand goes down. Before we get going, Khali says something, which HHH says is a good point, even though he has no idea what Khali said. Runjin Singh says Khali told him to get out while he can because this is a different kind of challenge. HHH tells Singh to find a lamp to rub to put Khali back inside.

The reality is Khali has never been in the ring with someone like HHH, who is actually going to tell Khali his plans in advance. HHH is going to break Khali’s legs and there is nothing Singh or the jolly genie can do about it. With that out of the way, we’re ready to go and believe it or not, HHH is about to win when Khali attacks him. The head vice leaves HHH laying and commentary isn’t sure how he is going to survive at Summerslam. This was every step you would have expected, probably right down to the genie jokes.

Curt Hawkins has been attacked and there is another black rose.

We get another R-Truth video, talking about where he came from and showing him playing basketball with his friends. If you want to play the game, you have to get into it, and that is the truth.

Chavo Guerrero thinks he and Vickie Guerrero need Edge’s help to deal with this so he’s off to find him.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jesse

Jesse, with Festus, is the better competition that Kozlov requested. The bell rings so Kozlov bails from the crazed Festus before kicking Jesse down to take over. Headbutts and a suplex have Jesse in trouble but he gets in a shot of his own. Kozlov then headbutts him out of the air for the pin.

Raw Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

Chavo Guerrero found Edge and he is willing to help with Undertaker’s attacks, but Vickie Guerrero has to be civil.

Brian Kendrick vs. Super Crazy

Before the match, Kendrick brags about his power and introduces his bodyguard, Ezekiel Jackson (now with a last name). Kendrick knocks him into the corner to start and a dropkick puts Crazy down again. Back up and Crazy misses a charge into the corner so another dropkick can connect for two.

The camel clutch goes on as Tazz makes insect comparisons. Kendrick kicks him down again and grabs something like a seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up as Tazz wonders why Crazy, a Smackdown wrestler, is wearing an ECW shirt. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Kendrick down and a standing moonsault gets two. Jackson offers a distraction though, allowing Kendrick to hit the Kendrick for the pin.

Rating: C. Crazy was starting to fight back when he got cut off through the pretty stereotypical means. Kendrick continues to look and feel different while making me want to se more of what he’s doing. That’s a great sign and it was another fine performance, even if it didn’t have much time.

Post match Jackson torture racks Crazy.

Edge comes in to see the Guerreros and says he and Vickie can get by this. As the head of the family, Edge has a plan but it has to be his way. Vickie agrees so they head to the ring, where, after a break, Edge calls Undertaker out and even demands he use the powers. Edge then grabs a chair and cracks Chavo in the back, setting up a Conchairto. Edge turns Vickie’s wheelchair over and says he is who Vickie needs to worry about. Undertaker needs to worry about Edge taking him to h***, but he’s taking La Familia with him. Especially Vickie. Nice little twist there as Edge continues to be built back up before Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C. As has been the case lately, the wrestling wasn’t great but the other stuff didn’t bail it out here. The arm wrestling stuff went on forever and while the Edge surprise as the end was nice, it only got them so far. They need to get to Summerslam now, but they also need something better than HHH vs. Khali as a secondary match. Not the worst show, but Edge continues to carry this thing on his back.

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Smackdown
Date: August 1, 2008
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

Things have gotten more interesting around here as Vickie Guerrero seems to be rather vengeful after Edge cheated on her. As a result, Edge is now set for a Hell In A Cell match against the Undertaker at Summerslam, which cannot end well for him. Other than that, HHH is set to defend the World Title against the Great Khali. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge apologizing to Vickie Guerrero but getting sent to the Cell anyway.

Opening sequence.

Here is Jeff Hardy to watch the first match as we’re told that he is facing Edge at Saturday Night’s Main Event. This is noteworthy as other than the Jenny McCarthy stuff, the show has not been mentioned in the slightest.

MVP vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

MVP comes out first and is announced as “coming to the ring to face Jimmy Wang Yang”, which isn’t something you often hear. Before the match, MVP mocks Hardy for never being WWE Champion because of his risky behavior. MVP wastes no time in knocking Yang down and then faceplants him without much trouble. The double underhook crank goes on, allowing MVP to yell at Hardy a bit more. Yang fights up and strikes away, including a running spinwheel kick in the corner. MVP is right back with a gutbuster though and the Drive By finishes.

Post match Hardy gets in the ring and tells MVP to never mention his family or dog again. The ensuing brawl goes to Hardy.

Chavo Guerrero isn’t sure who the surprise guest on the Cutting Edge is tonight but he and Vickie Guerrero run into Alicia Fox. JR: “What is the wedding planner still doing here?”

Mr. Kennedy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. The bell rings and Kennedy gets in another name shout, as is his custom. Benjamin takes him down but gets chased to the floor for a bit of a surprised reaction. Back in and Kennedy starts in on the arm but Benjamin drives him into the corner to break that up. Kennedy gets in a knee to put Benjamin down and goes back to the arm. The armbar keeps Benjamin down before Kennedy kicks him in the face. Back up and Kennedy misses a charge into the post though and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin working on the arm for a change as they’re not exactly going at a high gear so far. A shoulderbreaker gives Benjamin two and the ensuing arm stomping has the fans a bit restless. Benjamin wraps his legs around the arm (at least he’s mixing it up) before switching to a cross armbreaker.

The cranking continues until Kennedy finally reverses into something close to a Sharpshooter, sending Benjamin over to the rope. Kennedy fights back but Benjamin jumps to the top for a spinning crossbody for two in one of those insane athletic displays of his. Kennedy can’t quite get a backslide but he can kick Benjamin in the face and hit the Mic Check for the pin.

Rating: C-. I don’t know what’s going on with WWE’s matches this week but they have felt incredibly lazy and slow paced. It’s been a lot of laying around in holds without much action in between. That doesn’t feel like what WWE usually does but it’s really not working. The talent is there, but it doesn’t matter if they aren’t going to use it.

Post match Benjamin says he won’t make excuses….but he has bronchitis.

Chavo Guerrero comes in to see Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins, who haven’t seen Edge. Their discussion of wrestling figures continues.

The Brian Kendrick vs. Stevie Richards

Ezekiel is here with Kendrick. Before the match, Kendrick talks about how smart he is and goes over his history in WWE, which was all a ruse to get here. If you have any problem with that, take it up with Ezekiel. Kendrick takes him down to start and cranks on the neck with something like a camel clutch dragon sleeper. Since that can’t last long, Kendrick hits a middle rope dropkick to the back for two, setting up a Boston crab.

With that broken up, Kendrick settles for kicking Richards back down and then standing on his head. Er, Richards’ head if that isn’t clear. Richards gets fired up and fights back, hitting his own kick for two. A nice Sky High gets two on Kendrick and Richards sends him outside, where Ezekiel cuts off the crash. Back in and a quick shot lets Kendrick hit the Kendrick for the win.

Rating: C. Richards’ comeback was nice here but it’s nice to see Kendrick getting to keep building himself up. He’s different enough kind of star and I’ve been digging the start of his run around here. Richards is a good choice to put someone over and make them look good, thankfully which didn’t take long to make happen.

Post match Ezekiel puts Richards in a torture rack for good measure.

Great Khali vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy realizes this isn’t going to be easy but shoves Khali anyway. Some right hands and a clothesline stagger Khali a bit but he takes Hardy down with a clothesline of his own. Hardy get knocked into the corner and slowly beaten down, as you might have seen coming. A hard slam puts Hardy down again so Khali does it a second time.

The big elbows in the corner rock Hardy again and Khali knocks him outside to cut off a comeback attempt. We take a break and come back with Khali putting on a nerve hold to keep Hardy in trouble. Hardy fights up again and manages a Whisper in the Wind for the big knockdown. The Swanton connects but Hardy has to take out an invading MVP, allowing Khali to grab the vice for the win.

Rating: C. This was about all you could expect from such a match, as Khali going ten minutes is only going to go so well. Khali’s reputation for being terrible isn’t exactly fair, as he is more than capable of having a passable match. That’s what we got here, as Hardy was fighting from underneath the whole way with a few nice hope spots. It wasn’t terrible by any means, which is getting close to Khali’s peak.

We get another R-Truth video, this time talking about how poor decisions landed him in prison. Someone told him everything to do and when to do it but then he became a free man. Now he’s determined to never let that happen again because he is in control. These have been very good so far and make R-Truth seem rather interesting.

Maria vs. Victoria

Victoria easily takes her down to start and grabs a front facelock. Back up and Victoria mocks the Kiss Cam, setting up the spinning fireman’s carry side slam for two. A headscissors gets Maria out of trouble but Victoria plants her right back down for two. We hit the seated full nelson for a bit before Maria is back up with a sunset flip for two of her own. Maria kicks her way out of the corner and hits a middle rope clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C-. Maria feels like the Smackdown version of Kelly Kelly, as WWE seems like they want to push her based on her looks and charisma. That makes sense, but the in-ring stuff just isn’t quite there. Maybe it could change for her as she is still mostly new in the ring, but it’s easy to see why she’ll get chance after chance. The fact that the fans like her a lot is only going to make it easier too.

Edge is in a confined space with Alicia Fox, apparently having invited her. He got her the ticket to the show because she’ll want to see his special guest.

Video on HHH.

Summerslam rundown.

Big Show vs. Domino

Domino tries a waistlock to start and is quickly knocked outside. Back in and some chops set up the chokeslam to finish Domino quick.

Post match Umaga comes out for the staredown with Show.

Chavo Guerrero and Vickie Guerrero don’t know who the special guest on the Cutting Edge is going to be. Didn’t we already establish that?

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table, a ladder and a chair. He’s rather worried as he sits down to talk about his recent search for inner peace. His marriage is going through a rough patch, but in just over two weeks, he’ll be locked in a Cell with the Undertaker.

We pause for the UNDERTAKER chant before Edge talks about all the footage he’s seen of the destruction Undertaker can cause. That is why he has surrounded himself with tables, ladders and chairs, because he knows them so well and they helped him vanquish Undertaker in the first place. He has found the one person who can help him against the Undertaker the most: MICK FOLEY!

This seems to take Foley by surprise but he eventually gets in the ring. Edge understands that they have history but he is a changed man. What he wants is Foley to remember what he used to be, so we get a video on 1998, including a bunch of stuff that has nothing to do with Foley.

Eventually we get to the Cell match with Foley and Undertaker, which has Foley smiling a bit. Edge knows Foley is still feeling that match but he walked away on his own. Since then, Edge has seen Foley try and fail to walk properly. Now Foley has the chance to help Edge get back at the Undertaker. Foley talks about how much he would love to help Edge, but the one thing he has going for him is his word.

For years, Foley has praised Edge both on the microphone and on the written page. Unless fans have a really long memory, they think Edge sucks. They have been looking at an Edge who takes shortcuts and plays the numbers game while relying on his wife. Foley cannot help Edge, because only Edge can help himself. He needs to find the Edge who made Foley believe in him.

Where is the Edge who made the letters TLC mean something? Just two years ago, they had the greatest hardcore match in Wrestlemania history. If Edge can find that Edge, Foley and JR can call the greatest match WWE has ever seen. But if it’s the Edge we’ve been seeing, the one who wears a white tuxedo and uses a loofah, Undertaker will massacre him. Edge understands and then decks Foley with the microphone but Foley fights back.

They go outside with Foley finding a chair but Edge kicks it back into his face. The spear sends Foley head first into the steps, allowing Edge to load up the table back inside. A quick Mandible Claw is broken up by a low blow and Edge puts him on the table. The big chair shots off the ladder through the table leaves Foley broken to end the show.

They took their sweet time to get there, but as usual, Foley can bring the goods when you ask him to get serious and emotional. They had to do this kind of a change for Edge, because Foley was right when he said we hadn’t seen the really good one for a long time. It’s the kind of beatdown you need, though I do continue to wonder why anyone would want Foley’s advice on a Cell match when he never actually won any of them.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was almost all about Edge, with only MVP/Jeff Hardy being something noteworthy otherwise. They’re betting heavily on that one match and I’m not sure it’s enough for two hours, especially with Undertaker not being around. Throw in HHH not being here other than for a staredown last week and Edge is carrying this show on his back. He can make that work if everything goes right, but there isn’t enough going on to make this show good. The Edge stuff was good, but they need something else and HHH is going to have to be back to make that work.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: July 25, 2008
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

We are done with the Great American Bash and HHH is still the World Champion, having beaten Edge, who is still having all kinds of issues with his new bride, Vickie Guerrero. That could go in a few different ways but odds are it is going to be the big focal point for the time being. Other than that, HHH Is going to need a new challenger for Summerslam so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge marrying and then cheating n Vickie Guerrero.

Opening sequence.

Here is MVP with the VIP Lounge to get things going. After bragging about his hair, MVP lists off his various nicknames before bringing out his controversial guest: Jeff Hardy. MVP gets right to the point by announcing that Hardy will be in a battle royal for the shot at HHH at Summerslam. Naturally MVP is the favorite to win the match but Hardy brings up that MVP hasn’t won a match in….well a long time actually.

MVP talks about how Hardy has a lot going on right now, like being on the cover of WWE Magazine. Hardy likes to take big risks, but some of them have resulted in some big failures. One of those failures is talked about in the Magazine, with Hardy saying it resulted in a 60 day suspension (but not actually saying what it was). MVP brings up Hardy losing the Intercontinental Title and his home in a fire, with Hardy not being sure why we’re talking about this.

MVP thinks Hardy’s reckless behavior might have resulted in the death of his dog and that is making him feel guilty (geez). The reality is that Hardy is ruining his career with his behavior and because of that, he will never be WWE Champion. MVP doesn’t buy that Hardy will never be suspended again, with Hardy saying he’ll be released instead.

That doesn’t work for MVP, who says Hardy needs to start acting like a professional and a grown man. Hardy says he’s all about second changes, which is something MVP should know about. MVP tells him to settle down and gets shoved to the floor. This was a really weird segment and felt more like a public punishment/embarrassment for Hardy than anything else.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Before the match, Benjamin says he liberated the US Title from Matt Hardy and there ain’t no stopping him now. Benjamin throws him down to start and drops some knees as Foley talks about Benjamin yelling at him backstage. Yang gets in an enziguri into a headscissors as Foley compares Yang’s speed to Cool Papa Bell (look him up). Not that it matters as Benjamin hits Paydirt for the fast pin.

The Edgeheads come in to see Edge, who is proud of them for winning the Tag Team Titles. Edge wants to apologize but they say it was his business. They have a match to get ready for and leave rather quickly. Edge looks at his wedding ring.

Festus vs. Curt Hawkins

Jesse and Zack Ryder are here too. Festus strikes away to start but misses a charge in the corner. Back up and Festus knocks him to the floor, where Jesse cuts off Ryder from ringing the bell. They head back inside, where Festus grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the fast pin.

Post match the bell rings and Jesse and Festus get beaten down.

Jenny McCarthy and her celebrity friends don’t like autism.

Edge corners Alicia Fox in the back and says she needs to blend in more. Bam Neely is shown listening as Edge says they’ll talk about this at the hotel. Saying it in front of a camera might not have been the best idea.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Stevie Richards

Kozlov takes him into the corner to start but Richards hits a quick clothesline for two. A belly to belly overhead suplex sets up a front facelock suplex as Richards is in trouble. Richards has to fight out of a Fujiwara armbar and sidesteps a charge to put Kozlov on the floor. Back in and a dropkick gives Richards one but a tornado DDT is blocked. The headbutt to the chest gives Kozlov the pin.

We get the same video on Edge/Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox that opened the show.

Battle Royal

Great Khali, MVP, Big Show, Jeff Hardy, Mr. Kennedy, Umaga

For the World Title shot at HHH at Summerslam. MVP bails to the floor to start, leaving Hardy and Kennedy to go after Khali in the corner. That gets them nowhere as Khali hits a double clothesline, followed by a big chop to MVP. Show hits a side slam on Umaga and gets the required showdown with Khali. Umaga is back up to superkick both of them down and we take a break.

Back with no one having been eliminated and Hardy hitting the Whisper In The Wind on Umaga. Everyone pairs off again and Hardy tosses out MVP for the first elimination. Show and Umaga slug it out with Show shouldering him down and then throwing Umaga out. Kennedy hammers on Show and is thrown out for his efforts.

That leaves us with Hardy, Umaga and Khali, with Khali chopping Show down. Show blocks the tree slam and manages a chokeslam, only to get headscissored out by Hardy. A Swanton hits Khali but just seems to get him back to his feet. Hardy kicks him low to escape the vice but Khali hits a chop and gets the win.

Rating: C. They kept this moving quickly enough and it for a better battle royal. You can only get so far with six competitors in the first place but the good thing is almost anyone could have won. I’ll take that over having a bunch of people with no chance in there and this worked well enough. Khali is certainly a dragon for HHH to slay and it should make for a….something main event.

Post match HHH comes out for the staredown.

We see a not so nice place with someone talking about growing up in a bad neighborhood, which is why he got caught in a life of crime. It taught him what he needed to know though and that is the truth, because R-Truth is coming to Smackdown.

Michelle McCool vs. Maryse

Non-title. McCool takes her down by the hair to start before they trade rams into the buckle. A dropkick drops Maryse (with a kick) but she sends McCool outside as commentary talks about Jennie Finch (popular softball player of her day). Back in and Maryse hammers away, only to get rolled into the heel hook to give McCool the fast win.

Raw Rebound.

Chavo Guerrero wheels Vickie Guerrero into the arena, where Bam Neely greets them.

Next week: Maria.

Edge tells Bam Neely that he needs to talk to Vickie Guerrero, in the arena.

Brian Kendrick vs. Shannon Moore

Before the match, Kendrick tells us how lucky we are to get to see him in person, because he’s that good. He also introduces us to his rather large bodyguard named Ezekiel, who will deal with anyone who tries to touch greatness. Kendrick hammers away in the corner to start but misses a charge, allowing Moore to hit a quick legdrop. Ezekiel offers a distraction though and Kendrick gets in a shoulder on the apron. Kendrick grabs Sliced Bread #2, which is dubbed the Kendrick, for the fast pin.

Bam Neely tells Vickie Guerrero that Edge wants to see her in the arena…but he can’t remember who is supposed to do the apologizing. Vickie looks….I’m not sure really.

Ben Stiller doesn’t like autism.

Here is Edge for his big meeting with Vickie Guerrero. Edge gets right to the point and says he wants to apologize to her in public, face to face, so he would like her to come out here. It takes a pretty long time but Vickie, with Chavo Guerrero and Bam Neely (in the busiest show of his life), finally comes out. Edge apologizes, saying that the video didn’t show how many times he tried to say no to Alicia Fox.

She was so aggressive and wouldn’t take no for an answer. Edge had to stay to hammer out the wedding plans because he knew how important it was to both of them. Nothing means more to him that Vickie’s happiness. Vickie seems touched and says she understands so we get a big hug, with Edge looking relieved. They’re not done though, as Vickie says she was a woman scorned.

While they’re better now, she did something when she was mad at him: she reinstated the Undertaker. Panic ensues but Edge says that’s good business. Undertaker and HHH can fight each other and he can pick the bones and get his title back. It’s not that simple though, as Vickie has already made a match between Undertaker and Edge at Summerslam….and it’s inside Hell In A Cell. Edge knows he’s in big trouble to end the show. This was actually a pretty awesome segment as Vickie strung him along for the whole time, knowing the bombshell she had waiting for him.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t your normal show, with only one match breaking three minutes in two hours. At the same time, they set up a few major matches for Summerslam, which is off to a hot start. The opening and closing segments both worked well, with the battle royal being fine enough. This wasn’t a show that focused on the wrestling, which is ok every so often as it can give you some important results. That’s what they did here and it made for a good show.

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Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

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Smackdown
Date: June 6, 2008
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We FINALLY have a new Smackdown World Champion as Edge (with all of his friends helping) defeated Undertaker in a TLC match to win the title. In addition, Undertaker is officially gone from WWE and I know Edge won’t be bragging about that in the slightest. We are less than a month away from Night Of Champions and that show could use some attention. Let’s get to it.

Here is One Night Stand if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of TLC, with Edge stealing the title. Actually not really as anything goes, so I guess it was clean? Kind of?

La Familia is in the ring, with Vickie Guerrero (back in the wheelchair after walking at One Night Stand) introducing Edge to quite the negative reception. They all have champagne as Edge thanks everyone, but especially Vickie herself. Edge talks about how Vickie completes him, because she made this happen. As for Undertaker, Edge would have run him out of here anyway so Undertaker should thank him. Edge: “May he rest in peace.”

Vickie announces that she and Edge are getting married in five weeks on July 11, but cue Batista to interrupt. Batista doesn’t know why he wasn’t invited to the party but he just wants to wish them luck. Actually he just wants to wish them bad luck and ugly kids because he doesn’t like either of them!

Either way, he wants a World Title shot, but Vickie gives him an eight man tag tonight where he can face La Familia while teaming with three partners…of Vickie’s choosing. Oh and if he loses, no title shots EVER! They certainly hit the ground running here after One Night Stand and that is a good thing, as Edge really needed to face someone new after that never ending feud with Undertaker.

Finlay vs. Chuck Palumbo

This is a Belfast Brawl (street fight) with Hornswoggle in Finlay’s corner. Hornswoggle goes after Palumbo’s bike and gets shoved down to start, meaning Finlay is ready to fight fast. Palumbo gets in a few right hands on the floor and it’s already time for some weapons. A drop toehold sends Palumbo face first into a trashcan but he’s back up with a right hand. Palumbo takes off a turnbuckle pad so Finlay gets the shillelagh, earning himself a big boot. With Finlay down, Palumbo loads up a chain but Hornswoggle hits him low, allowing Finlay to get in a chain shot to win.

Rating: C. That should end the feud but it’s kind of amazing to see how much Palumbo has gotten out of the whole thing. Finlay never was able to get the better of him without help and Palumbo dominated a lot of their time together. Not great here, but you’re only getting so much out of a five minute street fight.

MVP is in a sky box and doesn’t seem pleased with Finlay and Hornswoggle.

Here is Big Show, with a heck of a black eye, to brag about winning the Singapore cane match and say he’s on to a bigger challenge in Kane. Cue Mark Henry to interrupt because he remembered Show telling him to pick on someone his own size. Then he got involved in a match involving STICKS. Show got beaten up to look like that, and we see Show going face first into the steps to bang up his eye. Show is ready to fight but Henry walks away.

We see WWE accepting an award at a film festival involving the military. I believe we saw this a few weeks ago.

Great Khali vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce starts for the team and is promptly caught in the claw. Domino comes in and gets kicked in the face so they’ll try some double teaming. Khali has no time for this and hits a pair of chokebombs for the pin. Total destruction.

Vickie Guerrero talks to the Divas and compares herself to the Fabulous Moolah. She wants her own Women’s Champion though, so the Divas Title is coming. Tonight, we’ll crown one of the competitors. This has to happen as you can only have random matches for personal issues for so long.

We recap Jimmy Kimmel’s Cousin Sal, as trained by Roddy Piper, vs. Santino Marella. A lot of this is cut off of Peacock, likely due to trademarked footage.

Santino Marella vs. Cousin Sal

Roddy Piper and Jimmy Kimmel is here with Sal, who is in a kilt. Sarah Silverman is here in the crowd for a bonus. They circle each other to start as we hear about how much Sal has waned to do this over the years. Sal grabs a headlock and Santino might need to rethink this. We get the airplane spin and a suplex for two on Santino as Kimmel looks like he’s seeing an amusing dog trick. Kimmel offers a distraction and Sal gets a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. I almost didn’t rate this but it was officially a match. No this wasn’t anything from a quality standpoint and that wasn’t why they did it. This got them on Jimmy Kimmel Live and tied some things into that with the Piper appearance so it’s hard to complain. Nothing match, but they were in and out in less than six minutes.

Post match Santino jumps Sal but Piper saves Kimmel.

MVP is still not impressed.

Post break Sal is getting checked out by Kimmel, who won’t let Sal talk for some reason. Kimmel has Sal’s next opponent, and brings in Big Show for some clowning.

Miz and John Morrison mock Hornswoggle but Finlay comes in (complete with green hat) to scare them off.

Edge talks to Chavo Guerrero, who he wants to be the best man. He’s going to be Uncle Edge after all! Chavo is in and we get an awkward hug.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla vs. Maryse vs. Cherry vs. Natalya vs. Victoria vs. Michelle McCool

This is the Golden Dreams match, meaning there’s a gold star on a pole and the winner is in the Divas Title match. Everyone goes for the pole to start and that quickly devolves into a huge brawl. The ring is cleared save for Michelle and Natalya, with Michelle kicking her out and going up. Maryse makes the save, followed by Layla and Victoria doing the save. Natalya powerbombs Victoria and Michelle down and grabs the star for the title shot.

Million Dollar Mania press conference video.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Kozlov grabs a front facelock to start before kicking Yang in the face. The half crab goes on so Kozlov can yell a lot but he misses an elbow. Yang kicks him in the head, only to miss an elbow. Kozlov finishes with a belly to belly.

Batista is ready for Edge and company.

La Familia vs. Batista/???/???/???

Batista’s partners are Nunzio, Funaki and Colin Delaney. Batista and Ryder start things off with Batista not having much trouble. Chavo comes in and gets Jackhammered for two so Batista Rocket Launchers Delaney onto Chavo for two more. We take a break and come back with the villains taking turns on Delaney.

Edge grabs a headlock and forces Delaney to tag Funaki (sidenote: Foley points out that Nunzio and Funaki are former Cruiserweight Champions and very well could cancel out the Edgeheads. That might not be the story they are going for, but it’s accurate.), who gets beaten down for a change. Ryder’s chinlock goes on before it’s back to Edge, who counters the tornado DDT without much trouble. Funaki avoids a charge and Batista gets the tag to clean house. Edge breaks up the Batista Bomb and everything breaks down. Batista hits a double spear and the Batista Bomb finishes Hawkins.

Rating: C+. They were telling a story with Batista overcoming the odds here and, as Foley pointed out, Nunzio and Funaki have had some success before so they could have been worse. Batista getting the win should set him up for Night Of Champions, but odds are he has some more hoops to clear first. As commentary was pointing out though, with Undertaker gone, who else is there to come after Edge?

Overall Rating: C. The idea of Edge vs. Batista is nice and they do need a Women’s Title here, but the rest of the show wasn’t exactly must see. You had a bunch of short matches, including the pole match, and that doesn’t exactly make for a strong middle of the card. There are worse shows, but this didn’t give me confidence on the way to Night Of Champions.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Russell Crowe Wrestling: RussellMania 3
Date: March 30, 2023
Location: Burbank Moose Lodge, Burbank, California
Commentators: Erik Barnes, Rivers Langley

So this is Wrestling Pro Wrestling, a comedy promotion run by Brian Kendrick. The event was held over Wrestlemania weekend and then released on Youtube, though I have a grand total of no idea what to expect here. With wrestlers named Poptart Boy and Leather Daddy, I’m almost scared to know what I’m getting myself into. Let’s get to it.

Opening video, which features a bunch of stills and has quite the early 80s feeling.

Erik Barnes welcomes us to the show and makes it clear that Russell Crowe will NOT be wrestling and describes this as a wacky wrestling promotion. The Midcard Title (which sounds like the official name) and the Wrestle Turkey Title will be on the line tonight, but first, here is Cereal Man (a superhero with a box of cereal for a mask). He can’t find promoter Gary Tickles, who has left a note: “see you next show suckers, no refunds.”

There is an idea though, so here is Darwin Finch, apparently a scientist, who has invented a cloning machine. His goons have stolen some celebrity DNA, so here are clones of Tom Cruise, Gary Busey and Sean (normally spelled Shaun) White. Cereal Man says these clones suck, but apparently they are clones of celebrity impersonators on the Hollywood Walk of Fame (ah, the common problem). We’ll try one more so here is Chuck Norris….as portrayed by Jimmy Wang Yang. That’s enough for Cereal Man, who throws everyone out. Cereal Man: “You guys want to see a chicken wrestle a bear?”

Chick-A-Dee vs. Evgheni

Dee is a woman in a chicken costume (Commentary: “This pollo is loco!” Should be loca but whatever.) and Evgheni is a Russian bear. The Bear hibernates to start so Chick pokes him, only for the Bear to go back to sleep. Back up and a bear claw shove gets two on Chick but the referee faints after a well places growl. The Bear bites Chick’s face and then….decides to go to the bar, meaning it’s a countout at 4:09.

Rating: C. Yeah we’re going to be in for a weird show here and it should be a lot of fun as a result. I’m not sure I got the joke here but at least they are living up to the kind of show that they want to be. Also, thankfully they kept this short instead of driving the joke into the ground like so many would.

Anthony Andrews vs. Koto Hiro

Andrews is a cowboy and one half of the NWA US Tag Team Champions. Hiro on the other hand is your stereotypical Japanese masked man. They go for the grappling to start with the much smaller Hiro not being able to get very far. Hiro kicking him in the head works better though and a rolling cutter gets two.

Andrews knocks him outside and hammers away on the floor. Back in and Hiro snapmares him down into a jumping knee to the face but Andrews plants him with a Rock Bottom. A middle rope Codebreaker gets two but Hiro is back with a springboard spinning Codebreaker. That sets up a missed frog splash though and Andrews grabs a pumphandle powerslam for the pin at 8:50.

Rating: C+. Actually not too bad here, which mainly focused on a power vs. speed match. Andrews isn’t a hue guy but he’s big enough to outmatch someone like Hiro. Other than that, Hiro kept things moving enough and sold the big power stuff well enough. Not a great match, but it was close enough to being serious to make it work.

Respect is shown post match.

Fourmage Horsemen vs. Stoner Brothers/El Chupacabra/Anton Voorhees

Oh boy. This is WPW vs. Hoodslam, because that’s a good idea. So the Horsemen are Gorgonzole Anderson/Parm Anderson/Ricotta Flair/Tully Blancheddar, while the Stoners are Rick Scott and Scott Rick (not typos), complete with a STONERIZED theme. And yes, the Horsemen all have heads made of cheese. Before the match, Flair makes fun of the other four, including saying the Stoners are more like the Groaner Mothers. Anton and Tully start things off, with Tully going rather basic (“This is an aged cheddar after all.”) but Anton comes back with an enziguri.

Tully gets quadruple teamed in the corner so it’s off to Parm vs. Chupacabra, with the former being knocked into the corner. Rick Scott adds a superkick but Gorgonzole comes in for a wristlock. A series of shots in the corner put Gorgonzole down but he gets over to Flair for the rapid fire chops. Not that they matter as Flair is knocked down and picked up/dropped back by all four for a quadruple pin at 5:05.

Rating: C. Yeah I laughed and that’s the point of something like this. It’s a big choke with cheese puns and I don’t think they were trying to do anything else. Let them get in there, do their jokes and get out before it goes too long. If nothing else, points for being able to come up with a gag for the entire Horsemen, including that aged cheddar line.

A clone of David Copperfield (magician, not Dickens) and here is brings a fan into the ring for a card trick. Before he can complete it though, the Great Branzino, with his Goblins (Dingleberry and Grundell) interrupts. Branzino is about three and a half feet tall and says we’re not here for magic or over the top characters. No one wants to see that fool Luigi Primo! Cue Primo (the guy who can spin a pizza while doing really basic moves), with Branzino saying it’s an amazing coincidence that Primo is here. Since he is here though, the Goblins should get him!

Luigi Primo vs. Goblins/Great Branzino

They fight over wrist control, with Primo using the pizza to mistake. Primo hits them with the pizza, so Branzino tells the Goblins to form the TROLL TRON. As Grundell gets on Dingleberry’s shoulders, Copperfield gives Primo a second pizza, which he combines with the first to scare the Goblins away. Branzino hits Primo low for the DQ at 2:31.

Post match Branzino pulls out some pepperoni pizza flavored Combos but Primo chokeslams him onto them instead….for a pin, despite the bell ringing off the low blow. These pizza and magic themed characters should be better with their continuity.

Kid Isaac/Sam Squatch vs. Devastator 2/Devastatress

Devastator is billed from Hot Topic. Devastatress is a mystery partner, who is better known as Jazzy Yang (Jimmy Wang Yang’s daughter). Squatch is in a rather large Bigfoot costume and seems rather interested in the Combos. Isaac hands his sunglasses to Squatch to start and they are promptly destroyed. Devastator tries a test of strength and gets a tickle from Isaac and it works so well that they do it again. Isaac offers to let Devastator tickle him but gets kicked in the ribs instead.

Back up and Isaac runs the corner, walks the rope, and jumps back down for some more tickling. Squatch comes in to run Devastator over and a double shoulder gives Isaac two. Devastatress gets in a cheap shot from behind as commentary continues to call every move either the Devastator or the Devastat-Her. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Devastatress goes after the knee.

Isaac enziguris his way to freedom and hands it back to Squatch to slow things down. A Rocket Launcher hits Devastator for two but Devastatress isn’t tickleish. Instead Isaac forearms her in the face to little avail, as she drops him fast. A low blow to Squatch sets up a chokeslam, followed by a 3D to finish Isaac at 11:08.

Rating: C-. Once you got past the joke of every move being called the Devastator/Devastate-Her, there wasn’t much to see here. Isaac wasn’t overly funny and a guy in a Bigfoot costume is only going to get you so far. I wasn’t feeling this one, but when your entire show is a bunch of jokes, some things aren’t going to land.

And now we have the “Sexy Chino Hollywood Adjacent Dance Party”. We have Sexy Chino, the Clone of John Travolta, Emo Tep (the emo mummy), Boogaloo Brown, Haystacks (a large stack of hay wearing overalls), and David Boomerang (a giant mouse). They all dance until Boomerang….starts stabbing people. Boomerang is awarded the win “by way of stabbing” and apparently this is a pattern for him.

Tag Team Titles: Darwin Finch/Fidel Bravo vs. Fabio/LJ Cleary

Finch and Bravo (with El Cucho El Sicario) are defending. Finch and Fabio start things off as commentary stops to argue with Cleary over not being able to tell the challengers apart. Fabio hits a dropkick to start so it’s off to Cleary, who gets caught with a springboard armdrag. Bravo comes in and yells at Finch, allowing the challengers to take over and dance a bit.

The double teaming has Bravo in trouble and Fabio snaps off a suplex for two. Finch gets in a slap from the apron though and Bravo scores with a DDT. Everything breaks down and Finch and Bravo take over, with Bravo actually hugging him. Then Sicario hits Finch low, allowing Bravo to hit Finch with a Falcon Arrow so Cleary can get the pin and the titles at 7:12.

Rating: C. This wasn’t so much a joke as much as something with an actual storyline, which worked well enough. What mattered was getting the title change out there to make the show feel important and not doing a bunch of jokes for once. It makes something like this feel like it mattered, though things were hardly serious, as you should kind of expect around here.

Post match Officer Robot Cop (exactly what it sounds like) comes out to say the new champs broke the law so the titles are officially stripped. Finch and Bravo are still champions.

Midcard Title: Battle Royal

King Dezi, Jumping Jim Logan, Tarzan Duran, Man Like DeReiss, Hobo, Mike D., Charles Ray

Yes it’s called the Midcard Title and this is billed as a “several person battle royal”. Tarzan is Tarzan, Dezi is an actual king, DeReiss raps himself to the ring, Mike is rather muscular and Ray (a Ray Charles knockoff, complete with blindness and a yellow suit) is defending. Logan yells at everyone else to start and says he is NOT jumping, despite that being his name. He finally jumps once and a bunch of people knock him silly, allowing Ray to get the pin for the elimination.

Ray sings as everyone else fights to the floor (this is feeling a lot more like an elimination match than the battle royal they advertised) before heading outside to sing about how everyone in the ring is fighting and shooting. Mike bearhugs Hobo before Tarzan comes in to work on Hobo’s arm. Hobo hits a running corner clothesline but gets taken down by a flipping neckbreaker.

The singing is still going on as DeReiss stomps on Dezi in the corner. Hobo and DeReiss trade standing switches as Tarzan listens to Ray singing. After Hobo misses a kick, DeReiss…..sprays him with air freshener for the pin. With that odd choice out of the way (Ray, still singing: “Positive sounds, that’s what I heard, hope it was good.”), Tarzan comes back in and kicks Mike outside. A springboard flip dive takes Mike down and a Code Red gets two back inside.

Mike pops back up with a powerbomb and a helicopter bomb finishes Tarzan. Ray, with his trombone, comes in and hits some people by mistake, allowing Dezi to pin Mike. We’re down to Ray, Dezi and DeReiss and the singing continues, with commentary talking about how long this song has been doing. Ray is now singing about how he has a goat and 58 farms so DeReiss goes after him, only to get sceptered down by Dezi for the pin. Ray thinks the scepter is the microphone and accidentally knocks Dezi out before covering him to retain at 14:45.

Rating: B-. Ray sang that song for over fifteen minutes and while it was just bizarre freestyling by the end, it went on for so long that it was hilarious. This whole thing was a bunch of people getting in a little bit of time while Charles did his thing and it worked far better than it should have. This was one of the better jokes on the show and that is covering a lot of ground.

Sneaky Snakes vs. Leather Daddy/Rubber Baby

The Snakes would be the Sassy Assassin/Sneaky Pete and are in striped shirts and masks, making them look like very stereotypical prisoners/bank robbers. They also have Sacre Blue with them, while Daddy and Baby have very large rubber fast masks. The Snakes jump them from behind to start as Blue seems to be fighting in this as well. Baby gets double teamed to start but Daddy makes the save with a double noggin knocker. Back up and Pete knocks the Baby’s head off, revealing a red mask.

Baby gets to clean house but super fan Courtney Glove comes in to try and calm him down….which earns her a trip to the floor. Assassin hugs Baby but gives him an atomic drop, resulting in a diaper issue (just go with it). Baby chases the villains around with a diaper and rubs it in Blue’s face…which apparently allows Blue to talk without a lisp. Blue: “I CAN FINALLY BE A VOICE ACTOR!” He’s so happy that he falls down and Baby falls down on him for the pin at 5:04.

Rating: D+. So that happened. I’m not sure I get the joke here but the Snakes were at least unique in a good way…I think. This feels like something where I might need to know these people a bit more to care and this wasn’t exactly the most brilliant comedy. Much more of a skit than a match here and not in a good way.

Post match another shot to the face brings the lisp right back.

Eli Everfly vs. Gregory Shmegory Sharpe vs. Mizuki Watase

Sharpe is a high flier (as in a pilot) and Watase is from DDT Pro in Japan. Actually hang on as we have a fourth entrant.

Eli Everfly vs. Gregory Shmegory Sharpe vs. Mizuki Watase vs. Watts

Watts, a rather skinny guy, is described as a powerhouse. Watase and Watts form an early alliance which is broken up in all of three seconds. With the other three on the floor, Watase hits a big dive and strips down to his gear. Back in and Watase hits a basement dropkick on Sharpe, who is right back with a Rock Bottom. Everfly comes back in with a springboard wristdrag but Watts is back in to fall away slam all three of them. A double chokeslam puts Sharpe and Watase down but Everfly gets the sleeper.

That’s enough to bring Watts down to his knees and a triple kick to the head puts him down. Watase takes Everfly down but Sharpe knees him in the face to leave all four down. A chokebomb gets two on Sharpe with Everfly making the save. Everfly hits a heck of a tornado DDT to send Watts outside, where a top rope hurricanrana takes him down instead. Back in and Watase brainbusters Sharpe for two, followed by a scoop piledriver (starts as a slam, ends as a Tombstone) for the pin on Sharpe at 7:54.

Rating: C+. Other than the pilot thing for Sharpe, this was a pretty straight match without anything very unique or even comedy stuff. That being said, it was rather nice to have a different kind of match after doing so much of the same kind of material (even in different forms) all night long. Not a great match or anything, but a nice pallet cleanser, which you need at times.

Wrestling Pro Wrestling Wrestle Turkeys Title: Poptart Boy vs. Dark Sheik

Poptart Boy (he’s a walking Poptart and teams with Cereal Man as the Breakfast Of Champions) is defending (the title is huge and looks to be homemade) while Sheik is a mermaid (so she has to hop to the ring). A lockup puts Poptart Boy against the ropes and Sheik (still hopping, because she has a single fin instead of legs) flips him off.

Poptart Boy shoulders her down and hammers away in the corner. Sheik hammers away (Commentary: “Shot to the frosting.”) and it’s a Fish One Nine before Sheik starts eating his filling (exactly what it sounds like). Poptart Boy is fine enough to hit a chokeslam and a falling splash (frosting side down) retains the title at 4:19.

Rating: C. I’m sitting here trying to think of what to say about this and….yeah what am I supposed to say? It’s a humanoid Poptart fighting a woman whose legs are tied together to make her a mermaid while commentary uses lines from Under The Sea. This was every idea you could think of from the outer reaches of an intoxicated mind and yeah, it was kind of great.

Russel Crowe Pro Rumble

Cinderella Man, Robin Hood, 3:10 To Yuma, Gladiator, Master And Commander, Master And Commander 2, Another Gladiator, Another Gladiator, Black Gladiator, Beautiful Mind, King Ghiraffedorah

Darwin Finch is on commentary and each one is a character from a Russell Crowe movie (plus some repeats because, as commentary put it, they were running out of ideas). The bell rings and hang on as here is Ghiraffedorah (a three headed giraffe, due to reasons of just go with it) to get in the ring. Everyone backs away from him but it’s a bunch of headbutts and chokes (with the arms being other giraffe heads). Then he spits something out and it’s…..the ace of clubs, the card from the fan with the card trick about an hour and a half ago! The fan comes in and gets attacked as well so we’ll throw it out at 2:33.

Finch: “I really hope I won’t be held responsible for this.” Ghiraffedorah attacks some fans to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked it. This show didn’t try to be anything that it wasn’t and completely embraced the insanity. It was one idea likely created by Brian Kendrick and his friends under the influence of various substances and as a result it was rather fun in a lot of ways. This wasn’t about wrestling but rather having a lot of fun with wrestling going on. It’s nothing I would want to see full time or anywhere close to it, but for a one off, there is some great stuff in here. Not all of the jokes work, but or a weird trip inside the mind of wrestling fans, this was a great time.

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Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2008
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re done with Backlash and Undertaker beat Edge again to retain the World Title. That leaves us on the road to Judgment day and odds are the trilogy match between the two is on the horizon. Other than that we are going to need something else around here and we might start that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going with a big announcement: the Tag Team Titles, the United States Title and the Smackdown World Title will be defended. It was a bigger announcement when I heard it on ECW but Long’s voice helps anything.

Opening sequence.

Mick Foley is brought out as the new commentator and seems to be popular.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang and Moore are challenging and I almost had that written down before they came to the ring. Why? Well they’ve lost to Miz and Morrison a few times already and that just isn’t enough to prove a point in 2008 WWE. Moore takes Miz down for a fast two and a legdrop is good for the same. Morrison comes in and gets dropped with a spinning middle rope crossbody for two. Yang sneaks in for two off a dropkick but Morrison pulls him off the ropes to take over for the first time.

It’s back to Miz to grab a chinlock, followed by the running corner clothesline for two. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two more and it’s back to Miz for the seated abdominal stretch. An enziguri gets Yang out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Moore to clean house. Everything breaks down and Moore’s rollup gets two but the Moonlight Drive (apparently the debut of the name) drops Moore to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. It dragged a bit in the middle but these teams have chemistry together. That being said, it was hard to imagine Moore and Yang winning the titles in the first place and now the best thing we can do is enjoy matches without much drama about the result. The division still barely exists, so can we please get some depth going sooner than later?

ECW GM Armando Estrada introduces the next match.

Colin Delaney vs. Vladimir Kozlov

In a rare instance, neither of them have entrance music. Kozlov knocks him around with ease to start and hits a big boot to the chest. Delaney is sat on top and then thrown back down in a big crash. The reverse DDT finishes fast, with Estrada, who faces Delaney on ECW with Delaney’s future on the line, being rather pleased.

Mark Henry threatens Nunzio with pain during their match tonight.

Natalya/Victoria vs. Michelle McCool/Cherry

This was set up with some patented backstage cattiness. Natalya headlocks Michelle down to start and it’s quickly off to Victoria. Michelle pulls her off the ropes for a crash before a monkey flip puts Victoria down again. Cherry comes in with a high crossbody for two but Natalya trips her down like a villain should. The double teaming is on but Cherry manages to crawl over (despite Natalya holding her foot) for the tag to Michelle. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Natalya but Victoria shoves Michelle off the top. The crash is enough for Natalya to grab a rollup, with tights, for the pin.

Rating: C. The best thing I can say about this, and most of Smackdown’s women’s matches as of late, is that it felt like a match. It wasn’t the stereotypical Divas stuff, but rather a completely acceptable match. Michelle has come a long way in a short amount of time and I would assume a lot of that is due to working with a veteran like Victoria. That is a great benefit to have and if that is what it is, it seems to be paying dividends.

We look back at Undertaker retaining the World Title over Edge at Backlash but not letting go of the choke. Edge went out on a stretcher and Vickie Guerrero screamed a lot.

Mark Henry vs. Nunzio

Nunzio seems to know he’s about to be in extreme pain….so he brings out Big Show to be in his corner. Nunzio kicks away and it goes as well as you would expect. Henry shove shim into the corner and the World’s Strongest Slam finishes fast.

Post match Big Show gets in the ring and Henry backs off. Show tells him to pick on someone his own size. So not Show, who is 50lbs heavier and eight or so inches taller?

US Title: MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending after beating MVP to take the title at Backlash. The referee holds the title up so MVP pulls it away, apparently feeling that it’s his. Matt headlocks him down to start and then does it again for a bonus. Back up and MVP takes it into the corner, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A slightly angrier than usual MVP hammers away and we hit the chinlock with a facelock.

Matt fights up and manages a bulldog for two, setting up the fourth headlock takeover in about five minutes. Since it’s just a headlock, MVP pops up and gets punched in the face for his efforts. The running crotch attack against the ropes gives Matt a weird looking cover for two but MVP clotheslines him down again. Matt gets knocked hard off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with MVP holding a cross arm choke and then slapping on another choke to make it worse. This time Matt fights up and grabs a tornado DDT but MVP hits the running kick to the face in the corner to knock him silly. We’re off to a crossface chickenwing of all things but Matt is back up to slug away. A very out of nowhere Twist of Fate retains the title.

Rating: B-. This was a more aggressive MVP and that style worked well for him. There was almost no way Matt was losing his title so soon after winning it, but this feud certainly deserved a long rematch. I could go for more of the aggressive MVP though as it was easier to take him more seriously. Good stuff here and the best match on the show so far.

Mick Foley is in the ring and brings in Batista, who lost to Shawn Michaels following Shawn injuring his knee. Batista respects Shawn and while he doesn’t like some things Shawn has done, it was Batista’s fault for letting his guard down. We see a clip from the Highlight Reel on Raw, with Chris Jericho accusing Shawn of faking a knee injury. That idea makes Batista sick to his stomach and he hopes Shawn is hurt. If he isn’t, he will be when Batista sees him. As usual, short form Batista is the best Batista and he got his point across fast here.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Festus starts hammering on Hawkins to start and drives some knees to the ribs. As Foley tries to figure out which one is biscuits and which one is gravy, Jesse takes over in the corner. It’s off to Ryder, who takes Jesse into the corner. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Ryder gets two off a neckbreaker. Jesse belly to backs his way to freedom and brings Festus back in to clean house. A splash hits Ryder but Hawkins offers a distraction, allowing Ryder to get in a shot to the throat. Jesse has to come back in and the neckbreaker faceplant gives Hawkins the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s not easy to get into these matches anymore as it feels like these same teams have been fighting for months now without getting anywhere. Someone solving Festus isn’t the best sign for his future, but it’s even worse for Jesse’s, who only exists as Festus’ partner. Not a bad match, but the tag division outside of Miz and Morrison only feels like filler these days.

Finlay vs. Julio Dinero

Finlay drives a shoulder in the corner to start and drops Dinero with a clothesline. Back up and Dinero is sent outside as Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring. A backdrop and the Celtic Cross complete the squash to give Finlay the win.

Post match Hornswoggle hits a Tadpole Splash.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending…or he isn’t, as Vickie Guerrero comes out to say not so fast.

In recent weeks, Undertaker has injured a lot of people with his illegal choke. Therefore, the choke is banned and since Undertaker shows no remorse, the title is vacated. Since Undertaker won’t hand it over, Vickie sends Great Khali down to get it. Khali goes to get it and is kicked in the face. Undertaker grabs the choke as Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come down to get the title. The choke stays on so long that Khali is bleeding from the mouth as Undertaker lets go to end the show. That’s certainly a twist and at least gives them a better reason for Edge vs. Undertaker to continue aside from “Vickie says so.”

Overall Rating: C+. The twist ending boosts this up a bit as it makes things that much more intriguing. Unlike Raw, this didn’t feel as much like we’re heading for Backlash II later this month with Judgment Day. Focusing on the titles all night long is not a bad idea, and the MVP vs. Matt Hardy match was good enough for the show’s long wrestling segment. Nice enough show here, and I want to see where the main event story is going so points for getting the important stuff right.

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Backlash 2008
Date: April 27, 2008
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,277
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We are at the official Wrestlemania followup pay per view and the top of the card is rather stacked. First up we have a Wrestlemania rematch for the Smackdown World Title, though this time Edge is challenging Undertaker. On Raw, it’s a similar situation from Wrestlemania, but this time JBL is added to the John Cena/Randy Orton/HHH mix and it’s elimination Rules. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at how this is the Wrestlemania fallout, including the bigger matches.

Mick Foley is replacing Coach on commentary, which has to be a nice upgrade.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. MVP

MVP is defending in a match almost a year in the making, as they had a big feud going but then health issues slowed both of them down at different times. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get very far early on. Matt drops the wrestling and hits him in the face, followed by a hiptoss for a quick one.

MVP puts him on top but gets elbowed back down, setting up a moonsault onto MVP’s raised knees. The abdominal stretch stays on the banged up ribs and MVP is evil enough to grab the rope. Matt grabs the leg and counters with something like a Samoan drop but MVP goes right back to the ribs. A big clothesline gets Matt out of trouble but MVP hot shots him ribs first onto the top.

The Playmaker is countered into the Side Effect for two and Matt goes up. This still doesn’t go well for him as MVP crotches him down but a super Side Effect gives Matt another near fall. MVP goes a little more basic by kicking him in the head and then does it again for a bonus. The running boot in the corner misses though and the Twist of Fate gives Matt the pin and the title.

Rating: B. The ending was a little flat but what mattered here was giving Matt the big win to FINALLY pay off the feud. Other than that, they had a hard hitting match with Matt having to fight from behind for a good portion but he managed to hang in there enough. The ending was clean too and now Matt can move on to something else, albeit likely after a big rematch with MVP first.

In the back, Matt Hardy talks about how this is the biggest win of his career and emphatically says he is BETTER THAN MVP.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero, with Bam Neely, is challenging. Kane sends him into the corner to start and hits a basement dropkick but seems to be limping a bit. A gorilla press plants Chavo but he’s right back with some shots to the hip/leg. The still limping Kane sends him outside and gets in a ramp into the apron to work on Chavo’s back. The rather wise Chavo goes right back to the leg, sending it into the apron and post.

Neely gets in a cheap shot to validate his presence before Chavo is right back to a leglock. Kane powers up with an electric chair drop and some corner clotheslines. The side slam gets two and the top rope clothesline knocks Chavo to the apron. That’s enough for a tornado DDT to get Chavo out of trouble and it’s right back to the knee. The frog splash connects….with Kane’s hand, as he grabs Chavo by the throat for the chokeslam to retain.

Rating: C-. The problem with Kane vs. Chavo continues, as there is no reason to believe that Chavo, even with help, is going to be able to beat Kane. Throw in Neely doing almost nothing here and there was no reason to get involved here. Kane limped around a lot and then shrugged it off to take over in the end. There isn’t much to get invested in here and it shows worse every week this feud has continued.

Randy Orton isn’t worried about defending against three challengers tonight because he’s retaining the title.

Great Khali vs. Big Show

The fans seem interested as we get the big staredown to start, followed by the slugout. They trade headbutts and chops until Khali drops him with a clothesline. Show’s attempt at a slam doesn’t work as Khali knocks him out to the floor with another clothesline. A big boot drops Show back inside and Khali grabs something like a crossface (ok then). Show fights up but Khali falls on him to break up a slam attempt. The nerve hold goes on before the big chop to the head drops Show again. Show fights to his feet again and finally gets the slam, followed by the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t good, it was very slow paced, and I have no idea why anyone would have expected anything else. There is only so much that Khali is going to be able to do in the ring and they didn’t deviate from that plan, with a lot of Khali’s stuff involving him standing still. Not a good match by any means, but it was exactly how this should have gone and was far from some disaster.

John Cena and Jimmy Wang Yang seem to be talking country music when Randy Orton comes in. Cena and Orton trade threats for the main event.

We recap Batista vs. Shawn Michaels. Batista was unhappy that Shawn Michaels didn’t lay down for Ric Flair to keep his career alive. Shawn more or less told Batista to get over it and the match was set. Chris Jericho got involved as the guest referee and seems to be more on the Batista side, despite Batista sounding incredibly whiny in the whole thing.

Batista vs. Shawn Michaels

Chris Jericho is the guest referee. They circle each other a bit to start and both miss their early finisher attempts. Michaels tries to go after the arm by driving in some knees and grabbing the short armscissors. Batista powers up but they fall over the top, cranking the arm even more.

The bad arm is sent into the post and the armbar goes on back inside. Batista finally powers out of it and hits a Samoan drop, followed by a clothesline to turn Shawn inside out (that always looks cool). The good arm is used for some shoulders in the corner but Shawn counters the Batista Bomb into a Crossface. With Batista getting too close to the ropes, Shawn is smart enough to roll it back into the middle to keep cranking.

The rope is finally grabbed but Jericho has to pull Shawn off (rather quickly at that). Batista is back up with a side slam and a spear cuts Shawn in half for two. Shawn is placed up top but shoves Batista down, setting up the top rope elbow. The superkick is countered into a heck of a one armed spinebuster and Batista is shaking the ropes levels of fired up. The Batista Bomb is countered….but Shawn has hurt his knee on the landing. Batista, ever the genius, falls for it and gets superkicked for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a somewhat slower paced match but the psychology worked well. Shawn knew that he couldn’t handle Batista in a straight fight but he also knew that Batista was so mad he was going to come right for him. That let Shawn pick him apart, mainly with the arm, before outsmarting him in the end. That’s how the match should have gone and it worked well, with Jericho not being much of a factor whatsoever.

Shawn’s knee is banged up enough that he has to be helped to the back. Why do I not quite believe him?

HHH and Randy Orton have their own psych out session, with HHH saying that pride comes before the fall.

Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall/Layla/Melina/Natalya/Victoria vs. Ashley/Cherry/Kelly Kelly/Maria/Michelle McCool/Mickie James

Beth wants Michelle to start and shoves her down early on. Michelle’s kicks to the back don’t do much as Phoenix grabs a powerslam to take over. Melina comes in and gets beaten up by Mickie but Victoria comes in to slam her down. The dancing moonsault misses and everything breaks down fast. We actually settle back down to Beth chinlocking Ashley, who slips out of the Glam Slam. Everything breaks down again and we hit the parade of finishers. Beth’s release fisherman’s suplex finishes Ashley.

Rating: C-. This is one of those matches where there wasn’t much else that could have been done. You had twelve women sharing less than seven minutes and that is not going to go well. Maybe they were never given the time to do anything or they were trying to hide some of the limitations, but the Smackdown women really need something to fight over other than bragging rights.

We recap Edge challenging Undertaker for the Smackdown World Title. Undertaker took the title from Edge, but Vickie Guerrero has set up the rematch and put Undertaker through a bunch of opponents on the way. Simple story but Vickie knows how to sell it very well.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is challenging and is shoved outside rather quickly to start. Back in and Undertaker starts working on the arm to keep Edge in trouble and a good bit of cranking ensues. Edge gets smart by raking the eyes and knocking Undertaker outside, where a baseball slide knocks him down again. That doesn’t last long as Undertaker runs him over back inside and drops a leg for two.

Edge fights back again and gets in a shot to Undertaker’s banged up back, setting up the bodyscissors. A dropkick to the back, followed by a sliding dropkick to the back, has Undertaker in more trouble. Edge’s camel clutch goes on twice in a row, with Undertaker having to drop backwards onto him for the break.

They collide in the middle for a double knockdown but it’s Undertaker up first with Snake Eyes into the big boot. Undertaker shoves him off the top but misses a top rope legdrop of all things. With that odd visual out of the way, Edge grabs the title, only to have to counter a chokeslam to save himself. Edge goes for the turnbuckle pad, which the referee fixes, allowing Curt Hawkins to run in with a belt shot for two. Undertaker fights up again, takes out Zack Ryder, and grabs the triangle choke to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was a far cry from the Wrestlemania match and felt like a good TV match rather than a pay per view co main event. That being said, there is nothing to suggest that Edge can win a straight match against Undertaker so the ending was what made sense. Odds are this somehow still isn’t over though, as Vickie Guerrero dragging it out would not be a surprise. On top of that, who else is there on Smackdown that would make an interesting challenger right now? Anyway, nice match here, but nothing great or memorable.

Post match Undertaker keeps the hold on, with Vickie Guerrero coming out as Edge is bleeding from the nose/mouth. Undertaker leaves him laying and Vickie freaks out as Edge is taken away on a stretcher.

CM Punk wishes Randy Orton good luck, even as Orton is knocking on JBL’s door.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Randy Orton retained over John Cena and HHH at Wrestlemania so let’s do it again, with JBL added, and under elimination rules.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. HHH vs. John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending under elimination rules. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton goes for the belt, only to get knocked outside by JBL. That leaves Cena to hammer on HHH in the corner but HHH sends him outside. Cena runs Orton over on the floor and hammers away, only to get knocked off the apron and into the announcers’ table.

Orton and JBL double team HHH inside, only to have him double clothesline his way to freedom. HHH sends JBL into the steps but it’s Cena back in with the top rope Fameasser to Orton. The STFU goes on and JBL….is smart enough to not break it up. HHH crossfaces JBL, who pokes Cena in the eye to save Orton. With the crossface broken up as well, JBL boots Orton in the face for two but he clotheslines JBL right back.

JBL catches Orton on top and let’s just turn that into a Tower Of Doom for the big knockdown. Cena is back up to initiate the finishing sequence on HHH, who cuts him off with a spinebuster. A backdrop sends HHH to the floor and Cena STFU’s JBL for the tap. Before Cena can get up, Orton Punts him for the pin ten seconds later and we’re down to Orton vs. HHH.

Orton gets sent outside and rammed into the announcers’ table, only to reverse a whip into the steps. A catapult sends HHH over the barricade but a suplex brings him back to ringside. They get back inside with Orton slowly hammering away, including the backbreaker for two.

HHH fights out of the chinlock (eventually) but Orton knocks him right back down. The RKO is shoved off though and HHH scores with the jumping knee to the face. Back up and HHH hits a running clothesline to put Orton on the floor again, setting up a toss over the announcers’ table. HHH drops him onto the steps to make it even worse but Orton manages to counter the Pedigree back inside. An RKO out of nowhere gets two but the Punt, the RKO and the Pedigree all miss, setting up the Pedigree to make HHH champion again.

Rating: B-. This was weird, as the majority of the match was spent on HHH vs. Randy Orton, with Cena and JBL feeling like window dressing. That feels like a big shift over to a new feud and that might be more interesting than the three way or multi person feud. As for the match itself, the first part was quite entertaining but it got pretty dull once it got down to two, which has been the case for HHH vs. Orton over the years. The title change was a surprise though and that is kind of nice to see.

Overall Rating: B. It’s a rather unique show as you had good action and stuff did happen with some title changes, but it still didn’t exactly feel like a major event. What matters here is moving some things forward though, with the Wrestlemania rematch season wrapping up and hopefully getting us on to something else. It’s almost a hidden gem, as the action is worth seeing and nothing is too bad, but I’ll be hoping to remember this show in another day or two.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: April 25, 2008
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the go home show for Backlash and most of the show is set. We should be in for little more than a table setting show this week, as all WWE needs to do is hype up the pay per view a bit more. Undertaker isn’t going to be happy with Edge for helping to take out Kane on ECW, so vengeance may be required. For tonight though, he gets to defend the World Title against Batista. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Undertaker’s issues with Edge/Vickie Guerrero/La Familia, setting up tonight’s title match against Batista.

Opening sequence.

Here is La Familia to get things going. Edge praises Vickie Guerrero for everything she has done to get them here like the eye roll inducing villain that he is. Vickie announces that Undertaker vs. Batista is now No DQ, meaning they can beat each other up even more. Cue CM Punk to interrupt, with Edge mocking him for the King Of The Ring loss.

Punk holds up the Money In The Bank briefcase and says it’s a better way to the top than sleeping with the boss. He teases cashing in tonight, which doesn’t sit well with Edge. Not that it matters as Punk can beat Edge too, so Vickie makes the match for tonight. Edge promises to bankrupt Punk tonight. Good promo from Punk, as Edge seemed to remember the power of the briefcase.

The Miz vs. Shannon Moore

John Morrison is on commentary and Jimmy Wang Yang is here with Moore. Miz grabs a headlock takeover to start as Morrison goes on a rant about….saving the Earth? Anyway, Moore comes back with a headscissors but Miz pulls pulls him off the middle rope for a crash. A camel clutch keeps Moore in trouble and a hard clothesline takes him down again. The cobra clutch goes on but Moore fights up, only to get knocked right back down. The Reality Check is loaded up but Moore reverses into a backslide for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as the feud between these teams continue, despite Miz and Morrison beating them multiple times already. I still like the Moore/Yang team, just for the sake of throwing two people together to see if they can get somewhere. If there was an actual tag division around here, it might make more of a difference, but this is about as much as you can expect right now.

We look at the Presidential candidates addressing Raw this week. Still a fairly cool moment.

Cherry vs. Natalya Neidhart

Michelle McCool and Victoria are here too. Natalya takes her down without much trouble to start and we’re in the chinlock fifteen seconds in. A series of slams drop Cherry again and Natalya slaps her in the face a few times. Cherry slaps back but Natalya goes to the leg to take over. A leglock has Cherry in trouble but she’s back up with a bulldog for two. That’s enough for Natalya, who grabs the Sharpshooter for the tap.

Rating: C-. Cherry is another of the long list of women who don’t exactly shine in the ring but since Deuce N Domino are nothing these days, what else is she supposed to do? Putting her in the ring as a punching bag works well enough for a short match, but she is going to need to be able to do more than slap and bulldog to matter much. Then again, it isn’t like the women’s wrestling on Smackdown matters in any meaningful way, so Cherry might not have many worries.

Video on Big Show vs. Great Khali.

Here is Matt Hardy for a chat with Michael Cole. We look at MVP injuring Matt’s knee five months ago but Matt says his knee is 100%. At Backlash, MVP is going to find out what kind of a threat Hardy is…but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP has Cole leave and accuses Matt of distorting the facts. Matt says MVP is scared but MVP isn’t having that. The reality is that he has accomplished more in a few months than Matt has in his entire career (that’s a stretch). MVP holds up the belt and then kicks Matt in the knee/hits him in the head with the belt, leaving Matt looking….I guess you could say confused?

WWE had a Reading Challenge for Wrestlemania. Nothing wrong with that.

Edge vs. CM Punk

Punk shoves Edge into the corner to start but Edge is right back with a hammerlock. That’s reversed into a cradle for one and Punk cranks on the arm as well. Back up and Edge kicks away at Punk’s ribs but Punk is right back on the arm. Punk goes up top but gets knocked out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Edge working on a bodyscissors until Punk catapults him into the corner. They hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown but Edge rolls through a middle rope crossbody for two. The GTS doesn’t work so Punk settles for the knee into the corner into the bulldog back out of it.

Edge’s Edge-O-Matic gets two more but Punk scores with the springboard clothesline. Another GTS attempt is countered into the Edgecution for two but Punk is back up for the GTS. Edge rolls outside before the cover though and Punk is frustrated. He’s also distracted by an interfering Zack Ryder, allowing Edge to hit a spear for the pin.

Rating: B-. These two were having the main event style match and it got some time to make it better. What matters more in the bigger picture though is having Punk not only rubbing elbows with but being a threat to beat main eventers. He is on the way up from ECW and into the bigger picture and having matches like this will help that transition more than anything else. They even made it clear that Edge was beaten and only survived due to the luck of falling out of the ring in a nice touch. Good match here, and it should help Punk in the long run.

We look at William Regal winning the King Of The Ring. William Regal looking mostly insane while sitting on the throne is a great visual.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Marty Garner

Kozlov easily takes him over with a headlock before headbutting Garner down with ease. The reverse DDT gives Kozlov the fast pin in another squash.

We look at Undertaker’s introduction of the triangle choke, which has been quite devastating.

Backlash rundown.

Batista goes to see Vickie Guerrero and promises to win the title back tonight. Then he’ll hurt Edge on Backlash.

We look at the Hilary Clinton vs. Barack Obama match on Raw, with Umaga saving us from what I’m assuming was Vince McMahon’s fever dream come to life.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending and this is No DQ. We get the Big Match Intros (the Big Gold Belt being held up as the prize is always cool) and Undertaker starts in on the arm. With that broken up, Undertaker is right back on the arm before Batista hits a spear. Undertaker is fine enough to go for the triangle choke before Batista can get up but the quick escape sends us to a break.

Back with Undertaker hitting the apron legdrop but Old School is broken up. Undertaker breaks up a superplex attempt and now Old School can connect. A quick spinebuster (or powerbomb according to Cole) gives Batista two but the Batista Bomb is countered with a backdrop. Batista blocks the chokeslam and a powerslam gets two more. Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam for two of his own but another spear cuts him down.

For some reason Batista rains down right hands in the corner, earning himself the Last Ride for another near fall. The steps are brought in (as I remember this is No DQ) but Batista spinebusters him onto said steps. The Batista Bomb is loaded up…and Shawn Michaels runs in with Sweet Chin Music to drop Batista. Undertaker Tombstones him for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. Mostly unnecessary stipulation aside, this did feel like an important match and that is always appreciated. These two have great chemistry together and they beat the fire out of each other until Shawn came in for the storyline advancing ending. Good main event here, as two monsters beating on each other for a long time is rather nice to see, especially on free TV.

Overall Rating: B-. The two big matches carried the show, especially with the first two shorter matches not exactly working. Backlash is feeling like a very top heavy show, but the three or so matches on top of the card should be more than enough to carry things. Good enough show here, and I’m wanting to see Backlash so we can call it a success too.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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