On This Day: June 17, 2007 – Slammiversary 2007: The First TNA World Champion

Slammiversary 2007
Date: June 17, 2007
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Back to TNA again and in this case it’s the anniversary show. Since Eric and Hulk aren’t around yet, we have the then signature TNA match in the form of the King of the Mountain. This is for the vacant title because the NWA left and therefore we’re needing a first official TNA World Champion. Chris Harris is in the main event because…..I don’t think anyone knows the answer to that actually. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a of some shots of old wrestling and then the original TNA logo. We cut to some country/bluegrass style music set to clips of the old TNA stuff. Jarrett beating up Hogan is in there. Hogan never came to TNA until 2010, officially at least. Now we’re looking at someone that looks like Tiger Woods putting a golf ball as West and Tenay do commentary. Jeff Jarrett hits him with a guitar and keeps the ball from going in. Ok then.

Some band performs the theme song for the PPV. Fast forward time.

LAX vs. Rhyno/Senshi

LAX had dominated the company in 07 and this is Senshi (Kaval) and Rhyno’s first time teaming together. The camera seems a bit lower than usual. Maybe it’s a venue thing. Hector Guerrero is with Senshi/Rhyno because Konnan has been blaming him for LAX losing the tag belts. Rhyno and Homicide start us off and a powerbomb is messed up, sending Homicide to the floor I think by mistake.

Off to Senshi who steps onto the bottom rope to get in. Hernandez comes in and Senshi manages to get out of the way to preserve his life. He goes after SuperMex’s leg which doesn’t really do much at all. LAX can’t get anything going here and never mind that as Hernandez picks Senshi up and LAUNCHES him across the ring. I mean that man was airborne. It looked incredible.

Back to Homicide as LAX takes over and beats on Senshi. Rhyno hasn’t really done much so far but I guess they’re saving him for the big hot tag at the end. To be fair he’s good at the big explosive comebacks so I can live with that one. Hernandez throws Senshi around again but a powerbomb is countered and Senshi manages to hit the double stomp to set up the aforementioned hot tag. Rhyno throws everyone around and Hernandez goes to the floor. Senshi hits a HUGE dive to take him out but Homicide hits a cutter on Rhyno. Konnan and Hector get involved, allowing Rhyno to gore Homicide for the pin.

Rating: B-. Fun opener here and the high spots were VERY high. That’s how you open a show as the crowd is now really fired up and it’s due to the proper pacing of a tag match. On top of that, they kept it relatively short (8 minutes or so) which is the idea for an opener. Good stuff here and I liked it quite a bit.

Scott Steiner is legit injured and had to legit have his life saved in Puerto Rico so he might not be here.

We run down the card because that’s what TNA does on its PPVs.

There’s a mystery person in King of the Mountain, which I’ve already spoiled.

Video explaining King of the Mountain. We even recap the qualifying matches to fill in even more time.

Eric Young is all paranoid about getting fired. Traci Brooks, Roode’s associate, comes up to try and seduce him which would eventually work, making him sign with Roode. Gail Kim comes in and snaps him out of it by kissing him.

X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal

Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he’s molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash’s headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal’s face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.

Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don’t have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.

I’m not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don’t think it’s anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: “This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here.” Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman’s suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.

Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can’t hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.

Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn’t exactly over yet and he wouldn’t be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that’s all fine and good.

At the Slammiversary press conference, we set up the football players match. Yeah there are former Tennessee Titans wrestling tonight. Oh joy.

Storm is with Lauren (GORGEOUS) and rants about Wycheck some more.

Frank Wycheck/Jerry Lynn vs. James Storm/Ron Killings

Why is this happening? Oh because Wycheck was at the first shows. Ok then. Truth and Lynn start us off which is probably the best thing they can do. Off to Wycheck for the showdown with Storm….and Storm knocks him down on the first shot. Storm puts on a Titans helmet and dances around a bit and then knocks Wycheck down again.

Frank takes over and throws Lynn over the top onto the heels and the fans think this is good stuff. I guess the TNA stupidity follows them around. Wycheck misses a shot and is in trouble again. He had to retire due to concussions so the heels go for his head. A chair is brought in but the distraction is enough to get the tag to Lynn. Eye of the Storm takes care of him and Storm spits beer in the face of the other football player at ringside.

Truth comes in and doesn’t do as well so it’s a double tag again. Wycheck beats up both heels with celebrity stuff but Storm kicks his head off to cheers. The other football player makes the save and gets in a fight with Jackie. Everything breaks down and Storm has to take the cradle piledriver from Wycheck. Dang I hope he got a nice big bonus for that one.

Rating: D. I hate celebrity matches. I have no connection to Frank Wycheck and the only reason he’s there was he was a big football player in Tennessee. I love the NFL, but this doesn’t mean anything to me and we have to get a bad match that looks like Storm isn’t talented enough to beat a guy with zero experience. I hate these things.

We recap Backlund vs. Shelley. Shelley was one of Nash’s students and Backlund was crazy about Nash beating him back in 94. Shelley said that he could beat Backlund in 9 seconds and there was something about a book being stolen or something like that.

Bob Backlund vs. Alex Shelley

Backlund is one of those cases where I have no idea what they were thinking when they brought him in. We hear the stories of Backlund not signing autographs unless you can recite all of the presidents in order. Backlund takes him down with ease and the fans are mostly on Shelley’s side. They slug it out a bit and Backlund takes him into a short armed scissors. Backlund uses the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter (which should be called the Backlund counter but whatever).

Backlund hits a gorgeous butterfly suplex and then an atomic drop which used to be Backlund’s finisher. Sabin runs in to trip him up but gets crotched on the top. Shelley gets dropped into Sabin’s balls and a bridging O’Connor Roll beats Shelley clean. Yes, Bob Backlund just destroyed the Motor City Machineguns by himself in less than four minutes.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but this is a great example of “what were they thinking”. I mean don’t get me wrong, Backlund is a legend, but this is the year 2007. Who are they really appealing to with him? This one isn’t about me being mad about him being there, but more of genuine confusion. I don’t get this one at all.

The Guns try to double team him but they both get put in the Crossface Chickenwing. Nash comes out to break it up and Jerry Lynn comes out to even the odds. Nash kicks Lynn down and the Guns beat up Backlund. Now Jay Lethal comes down and beats up the Guns as well. I have NO IDEA what just happened.

Christopher Daniels starts calling out Sting and the lights go out. He’s the Fallen Angel at the moment and is facing Sting tonight. Daniels talks about being here to do the Father’s work and how he’s an angel. Again, I have no idea what they’re talking about here and I don’t think they know either.

We recap Christy Hemme vs. the Voodoo Kin Mafia (New Age Outlaws). They basically said you have to sleep your way to the top so she brought in a bunch of teams to face them and I think this is the final one with her bringing in the Bashams. There was a big brawl backstage and Road Dogg gave a big angry promo about it.

Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Damaja/Basham

At least we can look at Christy’s hottness. Big brawl to start and no one is really all that interested. Christy is chased into the ring and oh hey there’s the bell. Basham (Danny) vs. Road Dogg to start us off. Roadie gets beaten down and it’s off to Kip. He gets double teamed as well as the Bashams set for a double suplex. Roadie spears one of them and Billy gets a small package to Basham for the pin. This was NOTHING, not even lasting three minutes.

Billy chases Christy up the ramp but VKM associate Lance Hoyt picks her off. And then Hoyt beats up the VKM. Jimmy Rave would be added to form the Rock N Rave Infection which would only result in more tiny outfits for Christy and nothing else to note. This should have been on Impact. Oh and Christy kisses Hoyt after the Bashams help for a 3-2 beatdown.

Rick Steiner is mad about not having a match tonight but he has a partner. He whispers it in Cornette’s ear and Jim is very happy, saying the match is on.

LAX beats up Hector Guerrero.

We recap Roode vs. Young which is STILL going on. Jeff Jarrett made a one off return to help Eric and won Young’s freedom which didn’t count. The match is for Eric’s freedom of course but if Eric loses he’s fired, which was what Eric was terrified of at this point.

Robert Roode vs. Eric Young

Roode slaps Young in the head a bit and it fires Young up, making him shout HIT ME AGAIN. Young sends him to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take Roode out. Roode takes over quickly and we make Brooks jokes. There’s the Hennig neck snap and Roode is in total control. Time for a chinlock and I remember why I hated this heel run by Roode.

Eric counters into an electric chair drop and both guys are down. Discus lariat gets two for Eric. Young is sent to the floor so he pulls Brooks’ pants down after dancing with her. Top rope elbow gets two for Eric. Brooks comes in and there’s a double Death Valley Driver which gets two on Roode. You know, because a big and impressive spot like that shouldn’t end a match. And then Roode whacks Eric in the head with a chair for the pin. Seriously that’s it.

Rating: C-. The ending KILLS that match. Young was rather popular at this point and having him lose after a big spot like that is really pretty stupid. Roode was SO freaking boring as a heel and he never really changed anything about his character, which somehow made him even more boring. Decent match until the ending, but that kills it.

It’s a Dusty Finish though. Roode fires Eric but here’s Cornette to say hang on a second. The match is restarted and Roode hits him in the head multiple times. Gail runs out and beats down Brooks. The distraction leads to a rollup pin for Eric.

Team 3D doesn’t care who Steiner’s partner is. They think Scott’s throat problem is because he talked about the Dudleys too much and he’s hiding. D-Von’s head looks like it’s made of old shoe leather.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Rick Steiner/???

And the mystery partner is….Road Warrior Animal. Yeah that’s it. The fans chanting it before he came out kind of hurt the shock a bit. Rick puts on his head gear post bell and it makes a huge difference. Rick vs. D-Von to start us off. I don’t think Scott is in the hospital. I think it’s more like he and Animal cooked him and had him for a late night snack. It would explain those guts on them.

Animal offers to come in and Rick waves him off. Nice partner dude. Oh ok there he is and Ray gets in his face. A piledriver is no sold and we have gimmick infringement from Hawk. I guess since he’s dead it’s ok. Back to Rick and they mistime something, as I think Ray was supposed to hit Rick as he hit the ropes but Rick stopped with zero contact at all. Off to Bubba legally and a neckbreaker gets two.

D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the tag to Animal. Something I never get: why can a team that has never teamed together before like Steiner and Animal get a tag title match? There isn’t another team that can challenge the Dudleys? Animal cleans house and it’s back to Rick as everything breaks down. The challengers try to load up the Doomsday Device but Animal gets caught in the double neckbreaker and the 3D ends Rick.

Rating: D. These “dream” matches usually suck because by the time you get teams big enough to have a dream match, they’re old. To be fair though, there was almost no way Animal, who barely wrestled anymore, was going to be able to come out there and have a decent match. Scott may be old and slow but he’s active at least. Bad match, but understandably bad.

We recap Daniels vs. Sting. Sting mentored him which I don’t even remember and Daniels snapped because of it. I remember being excited for this match but thinking the match sucked. I wonder if it’ll still be the case. Wait….that might have been Sting vs. Storm. I think it was actually.

Christopher Daniels vs. Sting

Sting repels from the ceiling for no apparent reason. It looked cool though. Sting takes over to start and speeds things up, which you would think would favor Daniels. He hooks the Deathlock very quickly but Daniels grabs a fast rope. Daniels takes over and has a stupid Mike Tyson style tattoo (paint) around his eye. Sting fights back but neither guy can get a hip toss.

We go old school with an abdominal stretch which doesn’t count for some reason. Daniels and Hebner get into it a bit and then he snaps off a Stinger Splash. This of course fires up the Stinger and Daniels is in trouble. Faceplant gets two. Two Stinger Splashes are broken up and the Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) is countered into the Death Drop for the pin.

Rating: D+. Yeah it was this match that I found boring and lackluster. There was nothing here at all and Sting just beat him up like he was any other guy. Daniels had been built up as the guy that could take down Sting and Sting destroyed him here. I don’t get the point of this one and it didn’t work at all.

We recap Abyss vs. Tomko. This was another part of Abyss vs. Christian’s Coalition. Abyss had taken a huge beatdown from the whole team and Tomko is the first victim for him.

Christian’s Coalition says Christian will win the title tonight. AJ protests because he’s in there too. Christian says AJ will sacrifice himself so Christian can win the title and Styles isn’t sure what to think of that but he goes along with it because he’s an idiot at this point.

Tomko vs. Abyss

This is No DQ. Slugout to start is won by Abyss and they head to the floor. Tomko takes over with the violent tendencies, ramming Abyss into the steps to take over. Back in a bit boot puts Tomko down and TOTALLY misses an Umaga charge in the corner. Tomko sold it anyway because he’s not that talented. Chokeslam gets two. Here are the tacks but Tomko reverses and powerbombs Abyss onto them for two.

Abyss’ arm is busted open so he fires a shot to Tomko and hits the floor to get another bag. This time it’s glass but again he takes too long and Tomko gets a big jagged piece and drives it into Abyss’ head. In a SICK spot, Abyss is kneeling over the glass so Tomko practically curb stomps him into it. FREAKING OW MAN!!! They head to the floor again and Tomko finds a barbed wire ball bat which goes into the ribs and back of Abyss.

They go to the entrance and begin to climb. This isn’t going to end well. Tomko is up top with the bat but Abyss grabs the bat and pulls Tomko down to a big box sort of thing which falls apart. Tomko being up a few seconds later completely ruins the spot. I mean he’s up maybe 8 seconds later. Abyss is down even longer than Tomko was after that flip. Are you kidding me? Back in the ring, Tomko tries to pick Abyss up but walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the glass for the pin. That was pretty anti-climactic.

Rating: B-. This was about violence and on that note it worked, but the big spot of the match completely bombed. Like I said, having him pop up so fast just killed it. Not a great match or anything here but it was fun for the most part and that’s really all they could have hoped for out of this one.

Angle and Joe stare it down in the back. Angle says let’s go have a great match and beat each other up badly. Joe shakes his hand but says tonight it’s real.

Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He shows us an interview with Jeff Jarrett. His wife Jill had legitimately died recently and he wasn’t sure if he was going to keep wrestling. He talks about the history of the company, including stuff like Toby Keith and beating up Hulk Hogan. He talks about founding the company and his wife agreeing that it was ok. Then he gets to the heavy stuff, talking about his wife passing away less than a month ago. Jarrett is in tears almost the entire time while he’s saying this. Being in the ring is the worst place he can be right now though, so his future is unknown.

The fans aren’t sure if they should chant for Jill or Jeff.

Cornette announces the last guy in the match will be Chris Harris.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Chris Harris

This is King of the Mountain and the title is vacant. Ok so King of the Mountain is TNA’s signature match, or at least it was before Hogan and Bischoff took over. There are five guys and there is a place to hang the belt above the ring. In essence, it’s a reverse ladder match because you have to hang the belt above the ring. Before you’re allowed to do that though, you have to qualify by pinning someone else. When someone is pinned that person has to go to the penalty box for two minutes. Got all that?

Joe goes right after Angle. Cornette is holding the belt. This is kind of a mess at first which makes it really hard to call. Cage and Styles beat up Harris and then Styles lays down for Cage. Angle makes the save but Joe wants to hurt him some more. Styles takes Harris down again and wants Christian to lay down. Christian says no so Styles rolls him up for two. The camera is all over the place, making it really hard to keep up with.

Joe and Christian are in the ring now and down goes the Canadian. Off to Harris but the Cataonic and Unprettier both miss. A full nelson slam puts Christian down but Styles breaks it up. He gets caught in the Catatonic for a fast pin by Harris, making him eligible. The clock for AJ is at 1:30 by the time he gets in the cage. Harris and Cage fight on the floor so Joe throws a ladder at them.

Back to Angle vs. Joe with the fat boy taking over. Angle grabs a boot though and here are the Rolling Germans. Christian comes in and is in an ankle lock/Koquina Clutch combo. Styles gets out just in time for the save. Cage puts a ladder between the ring and barricade like a bridge. Christian falls down onto it due to a right hand by Harris to crotch him. On top of that he’s stuck there.

In the ring, AJ hits the Pele and springboard forearm to put Joe outside. Styles Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock but AJ breaks it, sending Kurt to the floor. AJ gets launched onto Christian onto the ladder. Harris goes up another ladder but Angle Slams him off for a pin to become eligible. Joe THINKS and throws the ladder to the floor. He beats up everyone in sight, hitting a MuscleBuster on AJ for two.

We get a ref bump in a gimmick match. Angle gets put in the choke and he taps, but there’s no referee. Christian hits Joe with a ladder and steals the pin on Kurt. Man there are some smart people in this company. The referee can’t let Harris out even though his time is up. Oh there’s another referee so it doesn’t matter. Joe stops Christian from hanging the belt and hits a huge cutter off the ladder onto the belt.

Harris goes up with the belt and people start booing. A belt shot stops Joe and he hiptosses Christian off, but Styles hits a springboard dropkick to break it up. Angle is out of the box. AJ and Joe climb on top of the box for no apparent reason. AJ kicks Joe low but Joe launches AJ off the top and through the announce table. Harris knocks Joe off the top and Christian is tossed back into the ring after climbing up as well. Harris hits a huge clothesline to kill Angle.

Everyone is down so Harris goes Terry Funk and spins around with the ladder over his head. He goes up AGAIN but Christian knocks him over and into the buckle. Christian goes up but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while the Canadian is still up there. No tap though and they fight on the ladder. Harris spears Christian off and Angle hangs the belt to become champion. How bad is it that I don’t remember him pinning anyone? I had to go back and find where he pinned Harris.

Rating: B. Good match here as the King of the Mountain was its usual insane but fun self. This is TNA’s signature match and almost as usual it gets to be a fun match. Angle winning the title and becoming the first champion is probably the right move. They waited WAY too long on pulling the trigger on Joe, but that’s TNA for you. Good main event though.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. There’s some good stuff on there for sure and the last two matches are both fun, but MY GOODNESS is this a chore to sit through. The core of this show is just exhausting and it feels like it’s never going to end. Not a horrible show at all but I’d have a remote in hand to fast forward about 60% of it, which isn’t a good thing at all.

 

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TNA One Night Only – Jokers Wild: It’s Missing The Wild Part

Jokers Wild
Date: May 3, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

This is the second of the One Night Only shows, meaning that it’s another show taped two months ago and airing now because TNA doesn’t want to do the traditional three hour PPVs every month. The gimmick this month is that we have a bunch of tag matches with random pairings and the winners all go into a gauntlet match with the winner earning $100,000. I don’t get why money isn’t a prize more often in wrestling anymore. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how all of these people are the foundation on which TNA is built. Allegedly this is a NEVER BEFORE SEEN concept, other than all of the other times this has been done over the years with various other endings. In the pure brilliance of TNA, they show us clips of various matches, including one partner turning on another. The idea of a spoiler doesn’t mean much around here does it?

Christy and JB draw names out of a tumbler in the ring to determine the pairings.

James Storm/Christian York vs. Gunner/Crimson

Wow Gunner still has a job? This is kind of an interesting match given that Storm has history with Crimson as Storm ended Crimson’s undefeated streak a year ago. Storm and Crimson get things going here with Crimson using the power game to take over. Storm comes back with a tackle and right hands as Tenay makes WINNING jokes ala Charlie Sheen. A hard clothesline puts Crimson down and it’s off to York who drops a knee for two.

Off to Gunner for the first time in a long time as Tazz makes ball jokes about Christy Hemme. It’s going to be a very long night on commentary. York gets two off a bulldog as we talk about the legendary Murphy. They slug it out for a bit with Gunner taking over, only to be taken down by a kick to the face for two. It’s back to Storm for a wind up poke to the eye before it’s back to York. Christian avoids a rollup but Crimson snaps his neck over the top rope to give Gunner control again.

Now Tenay is talking about walking through Memphis looking for moonshine as the match is ignored for the sake of inside jokes. A high collar suplex puts York down for two and a slingshot suplex gets the same for Gunner. Off to a chinlock by Gunner before Crimson comes in for the same hold. York kicks him away but it’s Gunner breaking up the tag again. Christian kicks him in the head though and it’s hot tag to Storm.

James cleans house and kicks Gunner in the head before getting two off a top rope crossbody. York catapults Gunner into a DDT from Storm for two but Crimson spears Storm down. Storm hits Closing Time on Crimson before York throws Gunner into the Last Call for the pin, advancing Storm and York.

Rating: C. I have a feeling my thoughts on a lot of these matches are going to be the same. This wasn’t bad or anything but the lack of a story is going to bring almost all of these down. Yeah Storm has history with Crimson, but it was a two minute match from a year ago. There’s no reason to watch any of these guys fight tonight other than money, meaning the matches are all going to be judged on in ring work alone. This wasn’t bad, but I can’t imagine them all being this good.

York thanks Storm for being a great partner but reminds Storm that it’s every man for himself in the main event. Storm is just thinking of how much beer a hundred grand can buy.

Jesse Godderz/Mr. Anderson vs. Douglas Williams/Kid Kash

No Tara unfortunately. Anderson comes out like normal to his own music and without the biker gear. Kash and Anderson start things off but Jesse tags in before anything can happen. A quick shoulder sends Godderz into the corner and it’s off to Anderson who might not suck as much. Anderson hits a quick dropkick to put Kash down and it’s back to Jesse for some arm work. He asks for a tag and Anderson isn’t sure if he wants back in or not. The announcers would rather talk about Aces and 8’s rankings and British terminology instead of calling the match.

Williams comes in and gets caught by a hiptoss and backdrop from Anderson. Jesse is jumping up and down to get in the match so it’s off to the rookie for some arm work. He cranks it once and already wants Anderson back in. Since Anderson is getting annoyed he takes more time, allowing Williams to suplex Godderz down. Off to Kash for a release belly to back of his own as the announcers continue to talk about stupid things like the “Pre-Tazz Era” of TNA.

Williams puts a cravate on Jesse for a bit, only to be taken down by a nice leg trip. Godderz still can’t make a tag though as Williams comes in with a clothesline to put him back down for two. Off to Kash again who helps out Williams with a double backdrop as Jesse continues to be picked apart. Back to Williams for a few slams as this gets more and more boring every few seconds. Kash kicks Jesse low and rakes his back a few times as we talk about roulette to keep up the announcers’ trend.

Off to a chinlock by Williams as we talk about gumption, moxie and tomatoes. I know I’m talking about the announcers a lot but it’s by far the most interesting thing in the match so far. Tazz actually says that Aces and 8’s don’t do losses. Jesse sends Kash into the corner but gets kicked in the face and caught with a moonsault out of the corner for two. Godderz is stomped around even more as Tazz talks about getting a furry sidecar on Bully’s bike. The commentary must have been recorded later as Bully wasn’t revealed as part of Aces and 8’s when this was taped.

A clothesline out of the corner takes Williams down and it’s FINALLY off to Anderson to clean house. Anderson hits his rolling fireman’s carry on Williams and loads it up on Kash, only to have Jesse pull Kash down to load up his own finishing move. Anderson kicks Kash down and Mic Checks Godderz before rolling up Kash for the pin.

Rating: D+. Remember what I said about the wrestling being the main thing to go off on this show? In this case it was hindered by Jesse, who is WAY too green to be in there as long as he was. There was a story being told here, but the match was so dull throughout that it didn’t make much of a difference. Anderson looked like a star though.

Bobby Roode says he doesn’t need strategy because he’s a winner in tag matches and single matches.

Crimson and Gunner complain about not being on television lately. Crimson wants to team with Gunner regularly since they’re both war veterans.

Christopher Daniels/Samoa Joe vs. Chavo Guerrero/Rob Van Dam

This should be interesting. Chavo and Daniels get things going and it’s a lengthy feeling out process until Chavo hits a dropkick to put Daniels down. Off to Van Dam for a kick to the face and a standing moonsault for two. Daniels rams RVD into the corner with some shoulders to the ribs, only to have Van Dam roll him up and crank on Daniels’ leg for a bit. Off to Joe vs. Van Dam as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer. Both guys counter everything the other guy throws until Van Dam gets a rollup for two and a standoff.

Chavo comes in and takes over on Daniels by stomping him down in the corner but a single shot allows for the tag off to Joe. Chavo punches Joe down in a rather surprising bit before hitting the slingshot hilo. Daniels cheats from the apron and comes in with more choking. Back to Joe for some headbutts and the enziguri in the corner for two. Back to the ball jokes by the announcers which never were funny in the first place. Off to Daniels for a chinlock as the match slows down a bit.

Chavo fights up with some elbows to the ribs as Tenay and Tazz talk about a party in the Aces and 8’s clubhouse. Back to Joe for the rapid fire punches in the corner followed by a crossface chinlock of his own. Guerrero gets back up but walks into a powerslam for two. Daniels comes in with an elbow drop and puts on what looks like a Tazmission. Chavo finally gets up but both guys try cross bodies and collide in the air.

Daniels drags Chavo back into the corner and Joe pounds him down again. An overhead suplex gets two on Guerrero and we hit the chinlock again. Joe loads up the Muscle Buster but Daniels tags himself in instead. A top rope cross body puts Daniels down and there’s the hot tag off to RVD.

Rob cleans house and hits a running spinwheel kick in the corner followed by Rolling Thunder for two. Everything breaks down and Joe hits a high collar suplex on Guerrero. Van Dam kicks Joe down but Daniels crotches him as he loads up the Five Star. Chavo takes Daniels to the floor, but Joe runs up and hits the Muscle Buster on Van Dam for the pin to advance.

Rating: B-. Definitely the best match of the night so far with all four guys knowing how to work the tag team formula quite well. Joe is the kind of guy that can work face or heel at the drop of a hat so we could easily have a face/heel dynamic. This is also the longest of the tag matches and that’s likely a good thing. Pretty solid match here.

Daniels celebrates like he just won the world title.

Godderz says he was responsible for 80%-90% of the offense and that he needs the money to fund his Hollywood parties. Anderson volunteers to throw everyone else out and let Godderz win tonight. Jesse leaves and Anderson says that’s not happening. Godderz is kind of funny at least.

Robbie E/Zema Ion vs. Bobby Roode/Joseph Park

Time for things to get wacky! Park wants to call the team Law and Order but Roode says no and calls Park Tons of Fun. Roode and Zema get things going as Park grabs the tag rope. Bobby runs over Zema and does the same to Robbie just because he can. Roode cranks on the arm and finally tags in the already sweating Park. Robbie seems to enjoy the prospects of fighting Park but Joseph is fascinated by the spiked hair. Roode: “TAG ME BACK IN YOU MORON!” Robbie tries a cross body but bounces off Park like he’s a wall. Park counters a slam into one of his own and the comedy continues.

Zema finally trips Park up and Robbie kicks away at the knee. Off to Ion with a missile dropkick and a middle rope forearm from Robbie for two. Back to Ion who tries a sunset flip but has to avoid a cannonball from Park. Robbie pounds away even more and the big man is taken down by a double back elbow. Ion comes back in to try a 450 but Park rolls away. He goes the wrong way and takes most of the splash but at least he tried.

Park punches Robbie in the head a few times but hits the middle rope splash for two instead. Ion uses Robbie as a springboard to hit Park in the corner, busting him open. Park snaps and it’s a chokeslam for Ion, a Black Hole Slam for Robbie….and he snaps back into reality. Roode tags himself back in and steals the pin for his team.

Rating: D+. Just a basic comedy tag match which was fine for the most part. The problem with comedy matches is that you can only reach a certain level with them and this match didn’t quite get there. Park is great in the role though and he played it perfectly here. The match was just kind of there though and it felt longer than it should have been.

Roode doesn’t want a hug post match.

Daniels celebrates in the back and offers to buy Joe dinner with the winnings. Joe says only one person can win and he’ll see Daniels out there.

D-Von asks Val if she’s part of the conspiracy to bring down TNA. He says that TNA can do nothing to stop them because this is their year. D-Von offers to give Val a job where he makes it rain.

D-Von/Doc vs. Alex Silva/Hernandez

Well that’s quite a coincidence. D-Von and Silva start things off and after about two minutes of circling each other we get some actual contact. Silva gets pounded down in the corner and D-Von is toying with him. A one footed dropkick staggers D-Von and it’s off to Hernandez to give him a real challenge. Off to Doc for the power vs. power match with both guys getting to show off their strength.

A delayed vertical suplex puts Doc down and it’s off to Silva who is promptly destroyed. D-Von crotches him against the post and it’s off to a chinlock by Doc. Off to D-Von again for a knee drop and a two count as Silva continues to be beaten down. Doc comes in with a legdrop for two and some elbows to the chest. A big splash gets another two as Silva’s destruction continues. D-Von puts on a front facelock but Silva escapes for the tag off to Hernandez. SuperMex cleans house but Alex tags himself back in like an idiot. A missile dropkick gets two on Doc but he gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin to advance.

Rating: D+. So a team that regularly works together is better than a thrown together team with a rookie for a member. It took ten minutes to get that point across? There’s nothing special to see here and if I have to hear about Taz’s sidecar one more time I’m going to lose my mind. The commentary on this show is absolutely horrible and it’s driving me insane.

Joey Ryan and Matt Morgan talk about percentages. I like Scott Steiner’s math a lot better.

Joseph Park talks about how important wins are. Christopher Daniels runs up and says he needs help. Joseph: “I told you she was seventeen!” Daniels offers Park 30% of the $100,000 (“$25,000 isn’t bad!”) for an alliance (“Your back is bigger than mine so I’ll be doing more work.”) but Park says no. He says if he wins, he’ll donate the money to a children’s charity in Chicago.

Matt Morgan/Robbie T vs. Joey Ryan/Al Snow

Wow, you mean people that don’t like each other are teaming together? That’s WACKY BROTHER! Once we were down to just two people left, why was Morgan surprised that Ryan was one of his opponents? Joey tries to run but Snow throws him back in to face Morgan. As Snow is throwing him in though, Ryan makes a quick tag so Snow gets the beating from Terry. Off to Morgan for some stomping of the ribs, which are covered in workout gear instead of wrestling attire.

Snow tries to get in a few shots but Robbie shrugs them off and rips at Al’s face. Tazz spends the whole match ripping into Snow for various reasons. Ryan bails away from a tag attempt as Tenay explains the Gut Check history between Snow and Ryan. Snow finally speeds things up a bit but Terry hooks a neckbreaker to put him right back down. We hit the chinlock for a bit as Terry tries to not screw stuff up. In an odd sequence, Snow catches Terry’s kick to the ribs, then tries a kick of his own which is also caught. He flips Terry off and hits an enziguri (to the shoulder) before making the tag.

Ryan is finally in and is immediately destroyed by Terry who hits a World’s Strongest Slam for two….as Matt Morgan makes the save. Morgan yells at Terry that Ryan is his partner, so Terry throws Ryan to a weakened Snow for a tag. Now Snow tries to get Terry to join up with him against Morgan before smacking Morgan in the face. Matt comes in and Snow is all fired up….and he tags Joey in. Morgan tries to tag in Terry as this completely falls apart. Snow bails from an attempted tag and runs a lap around the ring. Ryan offers to lay down and then jumps Morgan with the weakest forearms ever. The Carbon Footprint kills Ryan dead.

Rating: F. I have no idea what they were going for here, but it didn’t work. The fact that Ryan and Snow’s story was six months ago didn’t help at all here. I’m not sure what the rest of the story was supposed to be but whatever it was, it couldn’t have gone much worse. Absolutely terrible here and the last thing this show needed.

Joseph Park says he’s very tired but it was awesome to team with Roode. He doesn’t remember how they won at all though. Park also has no idea how a gauntlet match works.

Al Snow (in an interview clearly taped before the match as he looks perfectly fine) says he got his revenge on Ryan, which is worth more than the money.

We look back at the six matches to recap things.

Gauntlet Battle Royal

It’s basically a 12 man Royal Rumble meaning you eliminate people by going over the top and the winner get the money. Storm is #1 and Roode is #2. I think there are two minute intervals between entrants here. Roode sends him into the corner to start and pounds away as the announcers make thinly veiled references to the Royal Rumble. Storm comes back with an atomic drop and a backdrop before pounding away in the corner. Roode holds off elimination until D-Von is #3. That would put the intervals at about 90 seconds.

Storm gets double teamed for the entire time as Doc is #4. Seriously, there was nothing to talk about in that whole stretch. The bikers beat on the former Beer Money as Tazz asks what kind of a roller coaster he is. Storm gets up a boot in the corner and D-Von is in trouble. A double suplex puts Doc down and a double clothesline puts him out. D-Von clotheslines both guys down and Jesse Godderz is #5.

D-Von chokes Storm in the corner as Roode beats on Godderz. Bobby tries to put Storm out but Jesse the idiot breaks it up. Christian York is #6 as everyone fights each other. D-Von takes turns beating on Godderz and York as Beer Money continues their eternal feud. Joseph Park is #7 and appears to be sweating before he makes it to the ring. Now the intervals are at two minutes.

Roode offers an alliance with Park but kicks him in the ribs instead. Park runs him over before pounding on York in the corner, only to be hit low by D-Von. We’re into your standard battle royal formula here: a lot of stomping and punching near the ropes with the occasional attempted elimination. Mr. Anderson is #8 and still showing no indication of being part of Aces and 8’s here. He chops Jesse and hands him to Park for the easy elimination.

Now Anderson goes after Park for a bit before heading towards D-Von. The camera cuts away and once we go back, it’s Anderson working on Storm. Nice editing there. Park has D-Von in trouble in the corner but he sneaks back in. Daniels is #9 and you know he’s strutting on the way to the ring. He and Roode team up to have Park in trouble but an eye rake keeps the big man safe. Daniels is the only one doing much at the moment as we’re firmly in the battle royal lull.

Samoa Joe is #10 and he goes right for Daniels with rapid fire right hands. Now he’s after D-Von as Tazz freaks out. York and Daniels both survive elimination attempts and not a lot else happens at the moment. Rob Terry is #11 which means Morgan is #12. Terry starts cleaning house with clotheslines and throws out York to clear some space. Daniels joins York on the floor at Terry’s hands before Anderson misses a charge and goes out as well.

Here’s Morgan at #12, giving us a final grouping of Storm, Roode, D-Von, Park, Joe, Terry and Morgan. Terry tells Morgan to bring it on but D-Von and Park break up the staredown. Now it’s Park vs. Morgan and Joseph is out before I can finish typing that. Joe gets a running start at Morgan but is easily tossed out as well to get us down to five. A very low blow from Morgan is enough to eliminate Terry so we’ve got D-Von, Roode, Storm and Morgan.

Speaking of Morgan, he misses the Carbon Footprint and hits the ropes, allowing Storm to forearm him out. With the referee not looking, Knux of Aces and 8’s comes out and pulls Roode through the ropes and out to the floor. Knux tries to cheat again but D-Von hits him by mistake, allowing Storm to toss D-Von. Roode throws Storm over but makes the eternal mistake of not watching him the floor. One Last Call later and Storm wins the money.

Rating: D+. It’s a battle royal. What else do you want me to say here? It followed the same plot that almost all matches like this one follow, meaning it was ok once in awhile but for the most part there’s nothing of note to see. Storm winning is fine, although I’m really getting tired of people going bell to bell in battle royals. We get it: it’s something impressive. Let it rest already.

Lots of beer is consumed and Storm gets a massive check. He says the drinks are on him tonight and sorry about all the losers’ luck.

Apparently the next one of these is Hardcore Justice, which will include a Team 3D reunion and the return of some old hardcore guys, including Homicide, Hardcore Holly (he was never in TNA was he?) and…..Jackie Moore. DANG IT ALL!!!!!

Overall Rating: D+. As is going to be the case with these shows, the overall rating is a bit lighter than on other shows. At the end of the day, these shows are nothing of note and are there to fill in a spot. It was $15 for an HD PPV that runs over two and a half hours, so how much can you really complain? The concept is just ok and the ending is nothing special, but I’ve seen FAR worse PPVs. X-Travaganza was better though, and I can’t see many dropping lower than this one.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:




Impact Wrestling – April 18, 2013: Take The Midcard Out Back And Shoot It

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 18, 2013
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Todd Keneley, Taz, Mike Tenay

We’re getting closer to Slammiversary now but the main question is who challenges Bully Ray next? He’s already taken out Hardy and beaten him again in a rematch, so the next opponent isn’t clear yet. As for tonight, we’ve got AJ Styles vs. James Storm in what would be AJ’s first match in about six months. It should be interesting to see what he’s capable of at the moment. Let’s get to it.

We open with a nice graphic about praying for the Boston bombings.

We get the usual recap to open things up.

Last week after Impact went off the air, Aces and 8’s attacked Hardy with the hammer and he was taken away in an ambulance.

D-Von gives Bischoff and Garrett a pep talk for their handicap match with Angle tonight.

Garrett Bischoff/Wes Brisco vs. Kurt Angle

We get a quick video package on Bischoff and Brisco being mentored by Angle before turning on him to join the bikers. Brisco starts things off with Kurt easily throwing him around. Angle rams him into a buckle and then throws Wes off to Bischoff for a tag. Kurt easily throws Bischoff around and even tosses Wes to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Angle getting punched down by Bischoff before it’s off to Brisco for a chinlock. Angle suplexes out of it and it’s time to unleash the rest of the suplexes. Both bikers get a few Germans including one to both of them at the same time. That was awesome. Ankle lock to Brisco but here are the other Aces and 8’s to distract the referee and throw Bischoff a chain. One shot with that and Angle is done at 11:03.

Rating: D+. Dull stuff here with Angle having to slow himself WAY down to let the other two keep up with him. Brisco isn’t bad and Bischoff is improving, but that’s not really saying much when you consider how far down he was to start things off. At least they’re winning matches now though.

Post match Bischoff and Brisco hit a double powerbomb on Angle. Anderson says they’re taking over tonight and wishes AJ luck in his match.

Zema Ion and Petey Williams talk about the threeway tonight.

X-Division Title: Kenny King vs. Zema Ion vs. Petey Williams

Ion is knocked to the floor very quickly and apparently the referee now has a camera on his head. King kicks Ion down but gets caught in a quick Canadian Destroyer for two. Ion gets two of his own and the challengers get in an argument. Williams hits a middle rope rana for two but Ion comes back with some shots of his own. King is still down on the floor.

Zema puts on a half crab for a bit until Petey makes a rope. The Destroyer is broken up but Williams dives on King. Petey hits a release german suplex on Ion and a slingshot rana on King. After Ion gets in some generic high flying offense, Petey locks him in the Sharpshooter until King makes the save and steals a pin on Ion to retain at 5:47.

Rating: D. This match exists and I can’t think of much else to say about it. Seriously that’s it. It wasn’t anything exciting, it was nothing we haven’t seen before, there’s no reason to care about any of this match because there’s no issue between any of these guys, and the title is worthless. Nothing to see here at all.

Magnus says he’ll win the TV Title tonight.

The Knockouts are getting their own website.

Brooke Hogan wishes Mickie and Tessmacher luck. Tessmacher tells Brooke she’s here if Brooke needs anything.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Magnus

Knux and Doc jump Magnus on the steps until D-Von comes up to make it 3-1. The big guys give Magnus a double chokeslam but Joe comes out to make the save. No match.

Joe says that he’s getting the title shot against D-Von tonight instead.

We recap the AJ story with him walking out oon TNA and now being offered a spot in both factions.

Video on Velvet Sky’s knee injury.

Mickie James vs. Miss Tessmacher

Winner gets a title match against Velvet. ODB is guest referee again. They go back and forth for a bit with nothing of note going on until things get heated fast. ODB says cool it so Tessmacher grabs a quick rollup for two. Mickie puts on an armbar but Tessmacher is in the ropes. They head to the floor and ODB breaks up another brawl before they go inside again.

Tessmacher pounds away and hits a kind of X Factor out of the corner before giving Mickie a Stink Face. Mickie comes back with a flapjack and the Thesz Press off the top for two. They clothesline each other because this match hasn’t gone on long enough yet. They start slugging it out….and we get a short highlight package of big moves in the match so far. Mickie gets a rollup out of nowhere for the pin at 7:40.

Rating: D+. Business as usual for the Knockouts: two interchangeable chicks have a match for a title shot, then the title shot happens and that’s it. As usual, no story, the match was just ok, and there was nothing memorable about it at all. There is no focus on ANYTHING in the midcard at all and it’s getting really old.

D-Von harasses Joseph Park in the back until Bully jumps Park. Joseph gets choked by a chain and thrown into a shower.

Mickie says it’s time for her to be back.

Here’s Bad Influence for their sales pitch to AJ. Apparently the Bad Influence movie is in production and Morgan Freeman is in talks to play Dixie Carter. However, the important thing is that AJ is about to rejoin the band and they even have a shirt for him. First up though, they want the tag titles back and ask if the champions have the huevos to give them a shot.

Cue Aries and Roode for an interruption. Roode says he and Aries should get the title shot first. Daniels says that would work if Roode wasn’t Canadian because his opinion is only worth 75% of an American’s. Aries makes gay references and the insults start flying too fast to type. Chavo and Hernandez come in and Bad Influence bails. Aries and Roode turn around and get laid out by the champions.

We look at Hardy being injured again and hear from various wrestlers saying they have to unite against the bikers.

Recap of Aces and 8s’ carnage tonight.

Matt Morgan thinks it’s interesting that all this stuff with Aces and 8’s is going on when Hogan isn’t here. He lists off all of Hogan’s mistakes so far.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Samoa Joe

D-Von jumps Joe to start and chokes away with the towel. Joe fires back and pounds D-Von down into the corner as he’s all fired up here. D-Von gets in a shot of his own and starts choking away on the ropes followed by some choking in the corner for good measure. Off to a chinlock but Joe fights up and hits a quick enziguri. He loads up the MuscleBuster but here are Aces and 8’s for a distraction. Anderson hits Joe with a chain and D-Von gets the pin at 3:37.

Rating: D. What in the world are you expecting here? The match was like three and a half minutes long and had a run-in ending. D-Von is beyond worthless at this point but hey, he used to be part of a big time team so he must be worth something right? Nothing to see here for the most part, much like the rest of the matches tonight.

Post match Anderson hits Joe in the face with the knuckles again, seemingly injuring him in the process.

James Storm vs. AJ Styles

AJ turns around to leave but Storm follows him up the ramp and beats him up. A suplex is blocked as is the Eye of the Storm. They trade right hands with Storm knocking Styles back into the ring for the opening bell. Storm pounds away but Styles kicks him down as we take a break. Back with AJ suplexing Storm and putting on a chinlock to slow things down a bit. Storm fights up and hits a kind of TKO for two but gets crotched when trying a superplex. AJ hits a Tree of Woe dropkick for two and here’s Bad Influence to cheer Styles on.

Closing Time hits AJ and a Cactus Clothesline sends them both to the floor. Back in and Storm hits another Closing Time but the Last Call is caught and AJ hooks a rolling let lock for the tap out at 10:54. It looked like a cross between an Indian Deathlock and a half crab. How rare is it to see Storm tap out?

Rating: B-. AJ looked good here which is a good sign given how long he’s been out of the ring for. He looked very crisp and in good shape so at least we don’t have to worry about ring rust. That leg lock wasn’t bad and AJ mostly wrestled heel here, which is fine for a change. Good first step back for Styles.

Post match AJ lays out Bad Influence and leaves the ring for Aces and 8’s to destroy everyone in sight. Ray says that they’re responsible for destroying all of the fans’ heroes like Hardy and Storm. He then contradicts himself by saying it’s all Hogan’s fault. Next week Ray is going to call Hogan out.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh sweet merciful goodness the midcard was on display here and SWEET MERCIFUL GOODNESS was it awful. There are no stories to these matches and the only story going on, which is the Bikers attacking various midcarders, has literally been done before with the same exact people. It’s very clear that the main event is the only thing with any development at all and it’s really dull otherwise. Bad show tonight to say the least.

Results

Wes Brisco/Garrett Bischoff b. Kurt Angle – Bischoff hit Angle with a chain

Kenny King b. Zema Ion and Petey Williams – King pinned Ion after a Sharpshooter from Williams

Mickie James b. Velvet Sky – Rollup

D-Von b. Samoa Joe – D-Von pinned Joe after Anderson hit him with brass knuckles

AJ Styles b. James Storm – Leg Lock

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

 




TNA One Night Only – X-Travaganza: Minus A Big White Elephant

X-Travaganza
Date: April 5, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

This is the first in a series of shows TNA is putting on called One Night Only. Since they’ve drastically cut back on the number of PPVs they air a year, these shows are supposed to fill in the gaps. They’re completely non-storyline based and will all have a theme, such as this one which is all about the X-Division. This was taped back in January I believe. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look back at the history of the X-Division, which is a good flashback for modern fans because the current stuff is so far removed from the old days. A lot of the focus here is on Joe and Aries, which I believe is the main event tonight.

Ultimate X is back tonight. Cool.

Yeah Aries vs. Joe tonight.

Tonight we’re going to be looking at the Top Ten X-Division Moments. If Unbreakable isn’t #1, this list is a joke. AJ winning the first X Title is #10. Good match that.

Matt Bentley vs. Alex Silva vs. Lince Dorado vs. Sam Shaw vs. Puma vs. Jimmy Rave vs. Christian York

This is an X-Scape match, which means it’s pin/submission under elimination rules until we’re down to two, then the first person to get out of the cage wins. Bentley (then Michael Shane) winning the first Ultimate X match is moment #9. Shawn, York and Silva are Gut Check guys (actually Silva and Shaw were OVW Tag Team Champions as the Gutcheckers until about a week ago). The rest used to be in the X-Division but most of them aren’t much to talk about. Thankfully you have to tag here so things aren’t completely insane.

Dorado (who I don’t think has ever wrestled in TNA actually) and Silva start things off. Lince flips over Silva in the corner and armdrags Silva down before climbing another corner for a nice rana. Off to York to face Dorado but Lince is quickly replaced by Puma. York escapes a rana attempt but Puma does an Ultimo Dragon headstand in the corner before coming out with a headscissors for no cover.

Rave and Silva take over on York with some double stomping before only Jimmy stays in. Everything breaks down with everyone inside and Dorado and York pounding away on Rave in the corner. Dorado hits a tornado DDT on Christian for two as things settle down. York comes back with knee lifts and a neckbreaker to take Lince down. Off to Shawn vs. Silva with Sam hitting some dropkicks to take over. Bentley comes in again and suplexes Shaw down before hitting his cousin’s (Shawn Michaels. Seriously) top rope elbow for two.

York comes back in, only to be rolled up by Dorado for two. A springboard dropkick has York in trouble but he doesn’t feel like selling apparently. Instead of like, falling down, York pops back up and hits his swinging neckbreaker to eliminate Dorado. Puma comes in to face York and apparently Taz really likes saying his name. A middle rope dropkick puts York down and it’s off to Shaw. An Orton backbreaker and neckbreaker quickly take out Puma and we’re down to five.

Silva comes in to pound on Shaw and hits what I think was a running kick to the chest for two. Off to Bentley as Tenay picks everyone to win. Who does he think he is? Bobby Heenan? Shaw comes back in and hits the same two move combination for two but Bentley comes in and breaks up the cover to steal the pin on Silva. Uh….ok? Rave comes in to stomp Shaw (I keep writing Shawn for his name) in the corner. Shaw rams himself into the cage and gets caught in a kind of snap reverse Angle Slam for a pin by Rave.

We’re down to York, Bentley and Rave now in case you’ve had issues keeping track. Rave and Bentley start double teaming York and for once it actually works. They both get in a steady stream of shots on York until he gets a boot up onto Matt’s jaw. The rolling neckbreaker takes out Bentley and we’re down to Rave vs. York. Rave immediately takes York down and goes to escape but Christian is right there to break it up.

They fight on the top rope with both guys being rammed head first into the cage. Rave sends York back down to the mat but he climbs too slow again. Taz continues an unfunny running joke that Rave is Todd Keneley as York sits on top of the cage and pounds away. Rave pulls him down again and they fight on the top one more time before York hits a swinging neckbreaker off the top. That and a kick to send Rave back down is enough for the win for York.

Rating: C+. This was fine. The X-Division was built around a bunch of crazy matches like this one and while it never hit a high level like some of them did, it was still fun enough for what it was supposed to be. The talent level was lacking a bit here but for the guys and match style we had, this worked out pretty well. York winning is the right idea, given that he’s the only active guy in the match.

Moment #8 is Ultimate X from Victory Road 2008. I believe this was the World X Cup, which is an international competition which was cool in nature but it never quite worked. Kaz diving off the tower to legdrop Daivari was pretty awesome though.

Rashad Cameron and Anthony Nese are ready for Kid Kash and Douglas Williams. It’s old school vs. new school apparently, despite Cameron being around for like two matches. Rashad is very proud to be from Philly. He’s a bit famous as Sabian in indy companies like CZW.

Rashad Cameron/Anthony Nese vs. Kid Kash/Douglas Williams

Williams and Cameron start things off with Doug looking older than usual. Doug takes him down by the leg and puts on a kind of reverse Boston Crab where Kash can kick Cameron in the face. Cameron and Williams run the ropes a bit until Rashad dropkicks Doug down. Off to Kash as this could be a trainwreck in a hurry. Thankfully Nese comes in quickly and things speed WAY up as they trade controlling holds on the mat. We get some sweet chain wrestling until Kash takes over with knees and chops.

Nese comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body for two and a clothesline to send Kash to the floor. Anthony loads up a dive, only to be taken down by Williams. Doug heads to the floor with Kash and there’s a big dive by Cameron, followed by an even better one by Nese. Back in and Nese jumps into a forearm from Kash as Taz is talking about investment banking and area codes.

Williams knocks Cameron off the apron as the old guys take over on Nese. Kash comes in for some solid stomping before it’s back to Williams. The old guys do some old school double teaming on Cameron who has no idea how to deal with it. Kash and Earl Hebner get into it a bit in the corner before Kash hits a hard chop on Cameron. Back to Williams for a kick to the back and a nice snap suplex for no cover.

Kash comes in to work on the knee in a vain attempt to add some psychology here. Some hard kicks by Kash to the chest keep Cameron down as Taz starts talking about Aces and 8’s. Well we made it through forty minutes so it was bound to happen soon. Kash breaks up a quick comeback with a forearm but his moonsault hits knees. Hot (I think?) tag brings in Nese as things speed up again.

Back to Williams who misses a clothesline and gets kicked down by Nese. A nice pumphandle powerbomb gets two for Anthony as everything breaks down. Nese hits a running knee to Williams’ head for two as Rashad dives on Kash on the floor. A quick rollup gets two for Anthony but he gets caught in the Rolling Chaos Theory for the pin by Williams.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me. I’m not a fan of most of the guys in this match and the ending was just kind of there. That’s one of the major problems with this show: there aren’t going to be any in depth stories and barely any stories at all. That’s fine if the matches are really good, but this was only decent at best.

Moment #7 is Joe winning his first X Title by beating AJ at Turning Point 2005.

Samoa Joe says he’ll do anything to win tonight. He says he’ll choke Aries out.

Here’s Robbie E to say he invented the X-Division. He’s the best X wrestler and champion of all time and claims to have wrestled in Antarctica. Therefore, he’ll let us applaud him because we’re so lucky. Cue Chavo Guerrero to mention his family name in an attempt to get people to care about him. The match is made, and Joseph Park is referee because his brother Abyss was X Champion at one point.

Robbie E. vs. Chavo Guerrero

Robbie says he hates Park but insists on Park checking Chavo for weapons. E has to be checked as well so Park pats Robbie’s hair in a funny bit. They go into the corner to start with Chavo getting on Robbie’s nerves for being too aggressive. Robbie hits a quick backdrop to the floor but misses a dive to give Chavo control. Back in and the slingshot hilo gets two, despite Park barely being able to move.

They trade some kicks to the ribs with Robbie taking over via a middle rope elbow for two. Off to a chinlock but Chavo quickly fights up and dropkicks Robbie down. A spinwheel kick puts E down again but Robbie misses a crossbody and lands on Park. Joseph slams him down and it’s Three Amigos and Frog Splash to end Robbie.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much at all and Park added next to nothing to it. Robbie isn’t much to see other than a comedy character and Chavo isn’t much better. Yeah, Chavo is Eddie’s nephew and that’s about all he’s got as far as a character goes. I’m just not a fan of these guys and the match was pretty dull stuff.

We get a highlight reel of the craziest moves in X-Division history. If you consider a top rope cross body to be crazy I guess.

Kenny King (not even holding the X Title here) is ready for Ultimate X.

Moment #6 (I’m assuming these are being counted down. They aren’t being given individual numbers) is Ultimate X. Not a specific one or anything. Just Ultimate X in general.

Zema Ion vs. Mason Andres vs. Rubix vs. Kenny King

In case you couldn’t tell, this is Ultimate X. Tenay says this is “just the 29th time we’ve unleashed Ultimate X.” Yep, just 29 in ten years. By comparison, there have been 14 TLC matches in 13 years. The idea here is there are two ropes crossing way above the ring, forming an X. At their intersection there’s a big red X and whoever pulls that down wins. You have to use the ropes above the ring to pull yourself to the X to pull it down as the ropes are about seven feet above the top ropes of the ring.

Everything breaks down to start with Ion being sent to the floor. Rubix and Andrews go at it with Rubix taking him to the mat with an armdrag. King takes Rubix down with a sidekick but Ion is back in to take Kenny down as well. Andrews and Ion head down to the floor with King hitting a spinning springboard legdrop on Rubix back inside. Everyone is on the floor now as Taz keeps up his stupid jokes by calling Rubix Rubic like the cube.

Andrews and Ion are back inside with Mason going up, only to be pulled back down by Zema. Rubix comes back in with a sweet dropkick to Ion, sending him out to the floor. Rubix drops a slingshot legdrop on Andrews but Mason comes right back and pounds away on Ion in the corner. Ion slams Rubix down off the top as the match slows down a lot. King goes after Rubix’s mask in the corner but Andrews suplexes him off the top to save Rubix’s identity (which would be Jigsaw from Chikara).

Andrews stops Rubix from going for the X as Taz keeps the stupid running joke going. King dives out onto Rubix so Andrews dives down onto King to take both guys down. Ion hits a BIG corkscrew dive off the top onto Andrews and King to a rather weak reaction from the crowd. Rubix climbs up the structure in the corner to dive onto all three guys before heading back inside to go after the X.

It’s Kenny making the save though by pulling Rubix down into the Royal Flush to send Rubix to the floor. Ion crotches King in the corner but Kenny sends Zema to the floor to break up a superplex. Andrews manages to pull King down but Ion stops him from climbing across. Rubix comes back in and hits a dropkick on Ion and a tornado DDT on Andrews at the same time. Everyone is in a corner now and it’s Andrews going up, only to be pulled down into a German suplex by Rubix.

Rubix goes to the corner, only to be shoved down by Ion. Rubix and King team up to stop Ion with Rubix sending Ion into the structure in the corner. A dropkick takes King down but Andrews drives a knee into Rubix’s head. Ion and Andrews go across the ropes and meet in the middle above the ring with Andrews pulling Ion down in a Downward Spiral. In an anti-climactic ending, Rubix goes up and pulls down the X….but apparently he has to touch the mat. King catches him on the way down and steals the X to win.

Rating: B-. This was fun but the highspots were kind of lacking. It’s definitely entertaining, but again this doesn’t really mean anything and it was pretty clear that King or Ion was going to get the win. King stealing it was a nice touch but this was lacking the huge death defying nature of most of the Ultimate X matches.

Moment #5 is Brian Kendrick beating Abyss for the X Title at Destination X 2011, which was indeed an awesome moment.

Bad Influence says they’re national treasures and inspirations to children nationwide.

Sonjay Dutt and Petey Williams say that Petey was exercising when he was in his mother’s womb.

Moment #4 is the entire AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels rivalry.

Bad Influence vs. Petey Williams/Sonjay Dutt

Williams and Daniels get things going with Petey being sent in the corner but coming out with a headscissors and a smack to the face of Kazarian. Off to Dutt for a double elbow for a two count and some shoulders into Daniels’ ribs in the corner. Kaz comes in and ducks a kick, only to be caught by a standing moonsault for two. A dropkick gets the same for Dutt and it’s back to Petey.

Williams hooks a Sharpshooter on Kaz while Dutt hooks an Octopus Hold on Daniels. Petey hits some slick combo moves on both guys by hitting both guys at once before shrugging off a double leg drag. Kaz finally comes back and drapes Williams over the top rope to send him to the floor and take over. Off to Daniels for his slingshot elbow drop followed by the slingshot legdrop from Kaz for two. Daniels hooks a test of strength on Petey and climbs the rope to drive a knee into his chest for two.

We hit the nerve hold by Daniels for a bit before Petey is driven into the corner to break up a comeback. Kaz comes in for a front facelock as things slow down a bit as you would expect them to at some point. Petey finally fights up and gets to the corner for the hot tag to Sonjay. Dutt hits a cool bulldog into the middle buckle and a springboard legdrop onto the back of Daniels’ head for two.

Sonjay misses a springboard clothesline to Daniels and gets caught by a tornado DDT for Kazarian as Taz rips into Earl Hebner for being old. Dutt escapes Fade to Black but gets caught in a powerbomb/neckbreaker combo for two. Williams comes back in for his headscissors into a Russian legsweep for two on Daniels but Kaz breaks up the Canadian Destroyer.

Dutt hits a standing Sliced Bread on Kaz for two more but Daniels makes the save. Petey sends Daniels to the floor and hits a sweet slingshot rana to take him down. Dutt kicks Kaz in the head and loads up the moonsault double stomp, only to have Daniels break things up. Fade to Black puts Dutt down and the BME is good for the pin for Daniels.

Rating: B. Good fast paced formula based tag match here and that’s really hard to screw up when you have talented guys like these people. Dutt continues to look awesome since his comeback to the company but unfortunately TNA feels the need to focus on bland guys like Zema Ion for reasons I can’t fathom.

Williams hits the Destroyer on Kaz post match for old times sake. Petey wound up getting a job out of this performance.

We recap Jerry Lynn vs. RVD, or at least as much of it as we can without the ECW footage. I know this is blasphemy, but I’ve never really cared for their matches.

Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

This is part of Lynn’s retirement tour and is No DQ because that’s what these matches always are. Feeling out process to start with Van Dam getting a quick rollup for two until we get a standoff. Lynn is in a sleeveless shirt here, likely due to reasons of fat or injury. A clothesline puts Van Dam down but RVD comes back with his stepover kick to send Jerry to the floor. Van Dam follows him out, only to be sent into the barricade. Jerry slides back in but charges into a spin kick from Van Dam.

Rob brings in a chair but gets caught by a clothesline as he rolls towards Jerry in the corner. They head to the floor again with Van Dam draping him over the barricade for the legdrop to the back. Now Van Dam sets up a table in the corner but Jerry hits a springboard legdrop to the back of RVD’s head to take over. Van Dam escapes a DDT but gets caught by a neckbreaker for two. A clothesline from Lynn puts both guys on the floor where Rob sets up another table.

Lynn is sent back inside but Van Dam can’t suplex him through the table on the floor. A sunset bomb is blocked and Rob hits a legdrop onto Lynn on the apron. Back in again and Jerry hits a jawbreaker to stagger both guys but Rob gets the chair from earlier. His monkey flip out of the corner is countered into a release powerbomb onto the chair for two. The cradle piledriver is countered into a rollup for two for Van Dam and but he takes too long picking up a chair and gets speared through the table in the corner for two.

Van Dam’s northern lights suplex onto a chair gets two on Lynn and there’s a springboard kick to the face to put Lynn down again. The Five Star hits chair only and Jerry rolls him up for two. Van Dam tries to leg sweep Jerry but gets legdropped into the chair in a nice counter. Lynn gets two more off a bad TKO onto a chair and both guys are down again. Lynn takes the chair up top but a Van Daminator sends him very softly through the table on the floor. That gets two back inside and a good looking Five Star is enough for the pin for RVD, again with very little reaction from the crowd.

Rating: C+. This was a lightning fast match with some amazing counters and speed moves…..fourteen years ago. Now it’s two guys who are nowhere near as fast as they used to be and doing a lot of the same spots which were awesome back in the day but now are the same ones we’ve seen time and time again. The match isn’t horrible but it was clearly about five steps slower than their older matches.

Lynn and Van Dam hug and the locker room comes out to wish Jerry goodbye.

Moment #3 is Aries winning the X Title.

Aries says that Joe may be the best X-Division guy ever, but Aries is the greatest man that ever lived.

Jerry Lynn says he didn’t expect to have another match in TNA after Bound For Glory so this was a nice surprise. Van Dam and Jerry talk about their history together for a bit in a nice moment.

Moment #2 is Aries cashing in his X Title for a world title match which he won in a big surprise.

Moment #1 is of course the Unbreakable triple threat. It’s the best match the company has ever produced. Was there ever any doubt about this being #1? I have no idea why there would have been. We get comments from all three people who speak of it nearly in awe.

Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe

Main event time so we get big match intros. Feeling out process to start as neither guy seems enthusiastic to get going. Joe escapes a headlock and shoulders Aries to the floor. Back in and Joe cranks on the arm, only to have Aries nip up into a headlock. We actually hear about Joe’s 21 month ROH undefeated streak in ROH until Aries dethroned him. Now there’s something I wouldn’t have bet on getting a mention between all of Taz’s bad jokes.

Joe sends Aries into the corner for a hard running kick to the face for the first real advantage of the match. Some chops take Aries down for the knee drop for two and it’s time for some right hands in the corner. There’s the Facewash but Aries bails to the floor before the running boot to the face can connect. Aries is kicked into the barricade and chopped so hard that he falls into the crowd.

Austin is whipped into the steps as Joe keeps control before throwing Aries back inside. The fat guy takes too long getting back inside though and Aries takes out the knee to take over. After cranking on the knee in the corner, a DDT on the knee is good for two. We hit the leg lock as this match continues to not be at the pace you would expect from these two. Aries fires off kicks to the body and the leg but Joe just gets mad. A leg dive keeps Joe down though and it’s back to the same leg lock.

The leg is wrapped around the leg for a dropkick to the knee and there’s a dragon screw leg whip to keep Joe down. Aries puts on a Figure Four for awhile until Joe turns it….halfway over so Aries has to grab a rope to escape. Aries is sent to the floor and Joe hobbles through the ropes in an attempt at a dive, only to have Austin slide back in for his suicide dive to regain control.

After a victory lap around the ring, Aries goes up top for a good looking missile dropkick, but Joe pops up and runs over Aries with a clothesline to put both guys down. The Samoan pounds away and hits the backsplash followed by a powerslam for two. A powerbomb sets up the STF for Joe but Aries bites the hand to escape. There’s the rear naked choke by Joe but he doesn’t have it on great. The referee checks Aries’ arm but it drops into the ropes for the break. Nice touch.

Back up and Aries hits a running forearm and dropkick in the corner but Joe easily blocks the brainbuster. Aries comes back with a kind of crucifix slam for two but Joe is too fat for a brainbuster. Instead he busts out the 450 but has to land on his feet when Joe moves. A Rock Bottom out of the corner sets up the Muscle Buster for Joe but Aries rolls through for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B. Solid stuff for the most part here but it certainly wasn’t anything great. Joe was his usual self here, but unfortunately it’s the version from the past five years or so and not the one who dominated the X-Division for so many years. Aries was his usual awesome self, but he’s the same Aries he’s been since he got here, which may or may not be a good thing depending on your taste.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a simple one: if you like the X-Division, you’ll like this and if you don’t like the X-Division, you won’t care for this. The lack of stories is both a blessing and a curse here. It’s nice to not have the same Aces and 8’s stuff dominating the program, but having none of these matches mean anything brings the show down a lot.

Then there’s the big white elephant absent from the room: AJ Styles not being here. The guy is the greatest X-Division star ever and was the back that the division was built on. I know that he’s not active in storyline, but you could have said that he’s doing this for the love of the division or something like that. You can’t have an X-Division tribute show like this without having the best ever out there and it caused the show to be lacking a big something.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for only $5 at:




So Who Is The VP Of Aces and 8’s?

On Impact Angle unmasked the second in command and was shocked at who he saw.  He said “how could you” as he looked down at the guy, which means it’s someone we’ve probably known all along.  The most likely suspects are:Hogan: He’s a suspect for the leader of any heel stable because that’s the best idea TNA can come up with.

Joe: It would be a swerve, which is what TNA does most often.  It wouldn’t make sense but it would be the most likely pick probably.

Park/Abyss: Again it would be a surprise, but can you picture either character as the leader of a biker gang?

Bully Ray: Yeah he was in the ring on a live show seconds before this happened, but why should that stop them?

Brooke: Not the size, but if it gets Brooke a more prominent role on TV, why not do it?

Matt Morgan: He popped up on Impact for the first time in months at the same time the VP arrived, which sounds to be too much to be a coincidence to me.

D’Lo Brown: He’s been mentioned for months as a member of the team and there were small hints to it being him months ago, but to call this an underwhelming development would be the understatement of all time.

Eric Bischoff: Same reason as Hulk.

AJ Styles: The motorcycle he rode off on would seem to be a clue, but AJ was doing fine when the whole story started which would make a lot less sense.  it would however give us a top star in Aces and 8’s, which is what they need more than anything.

Jeff Jarrett: He’s been mentioned as a potential leader for months but why would that shock Angle, who has feuded on and off with Jarrett for years now?

 

At the end of the day, I’m going with either Joe or Park as VP with Eric Bischoff winding up as the leader/mastermind of the whole thing.  Not that either of them would be a great pick, but this is TNA where the reveals of leaders are rarely anything good.

 

Thoughts/predictions?




On This Day: February 14, 2010 – Against All Odds 2010: That One Time The Pope Was Awesome

Against All Odds 2010
Date: February 14, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

Well we’re a month and a half into the Hogan regime and things are looking better from a wrestling perspective but from a ratings perspective not so much. Anyway, tonight we have Joe vs. Styles and a one night tournament for the title shot at Lockdown, which isn’t for another two months but whatever. I fail to see where the card game aspect comes from also but whatever, The tournament is intriguing looking so let’s get to it.

Here are the brackets.

Pope
Desmond Wolfe

Hernandez
Matt Morgan

Kurt Angle
Mr. Anderson

Abyss
Mick Foley

We open with Flair storming in and he’s ticked because Bischoff is the referee. Ok then. Flair stumbles over his words a lot. Does anyone buy Flair as a 60 year old man being physically intimidating?

The opening video is about the tournament and how winning it is the ultimate prize. I thought that would be the world title but whatever. Oh and we hear about the world title match too. For the life of me, why are they making Styles into a Flair clone? He’s the best in the world, so let’s change it up right? That makes LOADS of sense.

The music sounds like bad lounge music.

8 Card Stud Quarterfinals: Desmond Wolfe vs. D’Angelo Dinero

Sweet goodness Chelsea looks great. Good night though, shut up Tenay and West. Wlofe is a guy I like more and more every time I see him. Pope….I just don’t get it. He’s a wrestling Slick and somehow that’s a gimmick? Wait…Tenay just asked which young stud will break through. Angle, Abyss and Foley are all former world champions, Hernandez has been around forever and everyone knows Kennedy.

I get the idea of what he’s saying but it’s still kind of dumb. The people are behind Pope, but at the same time how serious can you take the Impact Zone fans? They’re starting out fast paced here which I like pretty well. Wolfe’s nipples are really close together. NICE DDT on Pope. Pope has a unique style of striking which is reminding me of Sting, which is a compliment.

A top rope cross body gets two. The big lariat misses and Pope gets a rollup for two. And then we get a very contrived ending on the levels of the 619 as Pope hits the dumbest finisher in the company at the moment with the double knee to the back of the conveniently placed opponent for the pin.

Rating: B. Not bad at all and a very solid opener. They went out there and had a fast paced match. I would have had Wolfe go further, but if they wanted Pope to go over strong, I can’t argue with how they did it as it was a completely clean win.

Flair yells at Bischoff again. He declares himself the wrestling god. Oh dang it they’re channeling JBL. That can’t be good. You can smell Flair vs. Hogan and Hogan going over from here.

JB is (back thank goodness. Not a huge fan of his but he’s not Bubba so he’s great by comparison) with Morgan and Hernandez who says they fight tonight but they’re still champions no matter what. Hernandez being that much shorter is funny for some reason.

8 Card Stud Quarterfinals: Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

Not wild in the slightest about them having these two go at it so soon but I get the point again. Something I need to make clear: any company is going to get a lot of points for just having a direction and an idea that is clear. I likely won’t agree with it, but if something has a point that makes something resembling sense a lot of the time I’ll just go with it. This is one of those times. Don’t agree with it, but it’s passable.

Tazz thinks both guys want to win. Oh year that’s such great analysis. Winner gets Pope. Hernandez goes for a cross body and they botch the living heck out of is as Morgan tries to catch him but it fails completely. They’re being really tentative here which makes sense from a storyline perspective but at the same time it makes for some boring wrestling. Taz and Tenay are REALLY annoying. They finally crank it up a bit but not that much really.

We do get a 25-30 second delayed vertical suplex. That’s rather impressive. Uh oh Hernandez might be hurt. So Morgan goes for the shoulder and uses the tights to get the win. TNA…why are you trying to mess with things that are like your mother: NOT SOMETHING THAT YOU SHOULD BE SCREWING WITH! Yep they’re teasing tension between the two.

Rating: C-. This was too slow for my taste. It wasn’t bad at all but just not that good. I HATED the ending as these two simply do not need tension yet. I don’t like them as a team but it’s still stupid nonetheless. Morgan should have won though.

We recap Angle recently which is kind of odd but whatever. Ok this has gone on for about three minutes now. Angle apologizes to Hogan for….no apparent reason. Oh ok it’s for helping him Thursday. He also calls out Anderson, who is his first round opponent.

8 Card Stud Quarterfinals: Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle

He misses the mic. “That was intentional.” I chuckled. Kennedy is another guy that has found something that works and has RAN with it. Sometimes that’s the best thing to do and it worked here. For some reason his music starts up again after his promo and plays for like 3 seconds before Angle’s starts up. Whatever. Angle is another interesting case as he’s proof that a reputation can be a character.

The screen behind him says The Greatest Wrestler In The World. What more do you need to know about him? They start rather quickly which is a perk. Angle hits the post with his shoulder which I don’t think was his initial idea. Anderson gets the dog tag that Angle wears and cuts him open with it really bad. Oh man he’s bleeding nice and hard.

I love that release belly to belly that Angle uses. Take note Scott Steiner: there are other moves than that and a bad chinlock. There goes the buckle pad thanks to the heel here. Naturally the Angle Slam doesn’t work. Has that gotten anyone in forever? Angle GOES OLYMPIC but it doesn’t work. After being rammed into the buckle, Angle gets pinned by the Mic Check. Uh, yeah. Anderson spits on the dog tag afterwards.

Rating: C-. It’s certainly not bad, but this felt like it was just a total crash course of a match. They flew through it and it felt like it was about 3 minutes long when it was closer to ten or so. That’s not good, but like I said this certainly wasn’t bad at all.

Bischoff is with Foley and Abyss and if they don’t fight then the mask comes off. The fans are chanting Angle which is amusing for some reason. Also there’s no reason that Abyss should freak over the mask coming off when he took it off on his own months ago. It’s now a No DQ match. To clarify something FTS was wondering about, I’m ok with this as it makes sense from Bischoff’s perspective. It follows the story and I don’t need a scorecard to keep track of what’s going on. That makes up for the inconsistencies. I don’t like it, but it makes something close to sense so I’ll let it go.

8 Card Stud Quarterfinals: Abyss vs. Mick Foley

Remember this is No DQ. Foley’s music isn’t bad and Abyss’ is at least easily recognizable. Eric made him get rid of the flannel. Naturally Tenay argues over what material it is. The fans of course want to see the bat used for no apparent reason. Foley slaps Abyss. Only Foley could slap a monster and get away with it. We hit the floor and I like the mats they have.

They’re really thick which I have no problem with. Foley busts out a chair and takes over. The fans aren’t sure what to do here as is often the case with two faces fighting. It’s thumbtacks time. Abyss keeps going against the hardcore stuff here as he chokeslams Foley but makes sure it’s not in the tacks. The fans still want the bat. And Abyss steals the sock from Foley’s pants, prompting a USE THE SOCK chant. Ok then.

Foley takes the referee down and gets his sock. Well that works I guess. The Claw goes onto Abyss but it only gets two. Foley comes at him with the bat and walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the tacks for the pin. He freaks because he hurt Foley.

Rating: B. This is a very different kind of match as it’s more about thinking and storytelling than action. Now the smart thing is that they took a guy like Foley who is as good at in ring psychology and character development as anyone in history and let him do this as it worked really well for me. This was a situation where it wasn’t about the wrestling but it really worked which is incredible rare.

Pope
Morgan

Anderson
Abyss

No reason for those names. Just a writing exercise I thought I’d try.

The Nasty Boys are with Christy and apparently Nastys vs. 3D is 15 years in the making. The Dudleys (the famous pairing that is) haven’t been around that long but whatever. The Nastys say they’re here to prove something or other. Whatever. Knobbs can’t say the name of their opponents. It’s a number and a letter. We recap the feud which was ok if nothing else. Again, yes they Nastys have feuded with a lot of great teams. How many have they actually beaten?

Nasty Boys vs. Team 3D

So now people are being asked to pay to see the Nasty Boys. Good to know. That lounge music is REALLY annoying. No one in TNA has ever taken it to Team 3D like the Nastys? REALLY? Sags looks slimmer and nearly in shape. Knobbs…not so much. 3D runs them off and I guess they’re the faces? It’s been 2 minutes so they might have turned since then.

We get to a regular tag match with Sags vs. Bubba. Both guys have pants with their team name on it. Is that in case they get lost? Sign in the front row: pipe down nerds. That’s rather funny. The fans want to sit down and eat. What else could they want tables for? This hasn’t been as bad as I expected, but it’s nothing compared to the Nasty Boys doing science experiments like they did in 1995.

You have to see that clip if you don’t know what I’m talking about. SuperBrawl 1995, opening of the tape. Go find it as it’s just bizarre. Oh look: Brooke Hogan is here. It has nothing to do with the show or the match, but it needs to be noted: Brooke Hogan is indeed HERE. The Nastys take over now.

Taz says lifting Knobbs is like lifting a small foreign car. That’s rather funny. Sags takes 3D and JIMMY FREAKING HART makes the save. Are you kidding me??? His helmet is slammed into Bubba for the pin. Love that voice.

Rating: C-. I’m very surprised as this wasn’t terrible by any means. It wasn’t particularly good but it was far from bad. I do not get the point in the Nasty Boys being on TV but having Hart there is never a bad thing.

Joe and Bischoff talk about the world title match.

8 Card Stud Semi-Finals: D’Angelo Dinero vs. Matt Morgan

Again I ask: what is a street pope? I don’t get it. Pope does the Bret Hart glasses thing which works. They’re going big man vs. little man here so that’s all well and good. We’re on the floor now and not a lot is going on. Oh I almost forgot: this is the feud that made me hate Burke. Back in OVW these two feuded FOREVER and it couldn’t have been more boring if their lives depended on it.

It was that feud that made me hate Burke and it’s why I have issues about him to this day. Expect a low grade here. Morgan is acting very heelish here and I’m not big on that at all. It’s bearhug time so they’re not doing themselves any favors at all. Morgan is dominating here and screw that as Pope is making his comeback.

Morgan BLUEPRINTS UP though and takes his head off with a clothesline. So one minute Pope is in survival mode and the next he’s hitting the knees to the back for the pin. Riiiight. Oh I especially love Morgan being on the corner and looking over his shoulder twice to see when he needs to be ready to sell.

Rating: D+. While I want to fail it because of the people in it, this didn’t do it for me. The story and psychology were pretty much non existent here and the ending was completely unbelievable as in yeah right that was stupid. Yes there’s likely some bias in there and it wasn’t jumping off the page bad or anything so don’t think that’s what I’m saying.

Anderson cuts a rather funny promo about how he beat Angle. It’s funnier than it sounds. He says his name once, leaves to the left and comes back from the right to say it again. The guy can talk no matter what you think of his in ring stuff.

8 Card Stud Semi-Finals: Abyss vs. Mr. Anderson

We start with a very long stalling session here which I guess is ok. The crowd is oddly quiet here. Why is Abyss being a former world champion NEVER mentioned? I know it’s a different world title but it’s just never talked about at all. They’ll talk about the WCW and WWE titles whenever it benefits them. Hey, we’re on the floor!

Always good to see TNA mixing things up. For some reason I always love dropkicks to the knee. There’s just something cool about that. Anderson works on the knee so at least that makes sense. He goes for the mask and when Abyss is trying to fix it, the Mic Check sends Anderson to the finals.

Rating: D. This was really weak to me. The knee stuff led nowhere and the ending did nothing for me. Abyss is in desperate need of credibility. This should have been Foley vs. Kennedy, period.

AJ cuts a very solid promo about being a great worker. Again I ask; WHAT POINT IS THERE TO FLAIR BEING THERE IF HE CAN TALK THIS WELL??? “But KB, he learned so much from talking to Flair.” And I have to see Flair on TV making AJ look like he needs a mentor WHY?

If you want to make him act like Flair then fine but we don’t need to see him there every five minutes. Sorry I just completely fail to see what Flair is there for. He’s the golden boy and the man in TNA and the best wrestler in the world so he needs a mentor all of a sudden? He’s the BEST. How much better can he get?

We recap Joe vs. AJ which needs no recapping but whatever.

Bischoff is coming to the ring. And Hogan is here too. Ok then.

TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Remember Bischoff is referee here. Why is he referee? No clue but it’s TNA so that comes with the territory. I love the total lack of tattoo on his face. AJ has a Flair robe. Shoot me now. Ok the hood on it makes it a lot better than I thought. Why in the world are they making AJ a heel here? Seriously, he’s so insanely over and they make a fortune off his merchandise so let’s just throw that away.

He has blonde highlights now too. That’s just great. Fans are WAY behind Joe. There is something awesome about the way JB says “From the Isle of Samoa.” No idea why but I’ve always loved that. As soon as the robe came off AJ got about 10x more awesome. AJ simply doesn’t need Flair to be a heel. The interesting thing here is that Flair and Eric have legit heat. Some of you might not know why though.

Back in 1998, Flair’s son Reid was wrestling in an amateur tournament in North Carolina and Flair was dead set on being there to watch him compete. He gave warning to Bischoff that he would be there and that’s all there was to it. The thing is there was a Thunder, not Nitro or a PPV but THUNDER, that night. Flair, having a thing called common sense, thought that since he was Ric Flair and this was WCW and he gave sufficient warning that he would be able to have a night off.

Bischoff thought otherwise and suspended him. This literally went on for months and the fans reverted back to 1991 and spent the whole show chanting WE WANT FLAIR. So this led to a famous as well as awesome moment where Arn Anderson reformed the Horsemen (adding in Dean Malenko for the first time) and completely unannounced brought out Flair for the first time in about four months in NORTH CAROLINA. What the heck do you think the reaction was?

Naturally Flair gets one of the biggest pops in WCW history and looks like a million bucks and the fans are FREAKING OUT. And of course they had Flair have a heart attack a few weeks later then had Bischoff beat him at Starrcade with a screwjob ending that the fans booed out of the freaking building. How did that company ever make a freaking dime?

The Horsemen were then, you guessed it, fed to the NWO and made to look like jokes while Hogan won the world title from Nash in the Fingerpoke of Doom, because of course having the guy the fans are cheering for like there’s no tomorrow being pushed as a serious character can’t work so let’s just stick with the same stuff that’s made us lose the biggest ratings lead in wrestling history while Austin and Vince are owning us in the ratings right?

ANYWAY, the point is that Bischoff more or less said that Flair was just one of the wrestlers and that carrying the company for as many years as he did was NOTHING in comparison to guys like Hogan and Savage who came in and tanked the company for two years before the one good idea that Bischoff had (read as stole from two Japanese companies that did the same thing years before the NWO was even heard of) made any money before he ran the company into the ground. Flair was disrespected and the fans chanted WE WANT FLAIR very loudly and Bischoff had to back down and let Flair come back before embarrassing him again.

Oh yeah there’s a PPV here. There is something just freaking awesome about the fans chanting JOE’S GONNA KILL YOU. How can that not get into your head? AJ works on the knee. Ok, that’s fine if he does it a bit but you have AJ Styles in there. Have him use his stuff, not Flair’s as his primary offense. We’re on the floor (I know I’m shocked too) and AJ is trying to suplex Joe which fails more than Flair’s hair.

I’m glad Joe is in the shorts again. They work better for him. Joe counters a top rope hurricanrana and goes aerial and hits kind of an enziguri to the front of the face. Flair goes after the leg. Never mind that it’s the WRONG ONE as AJ had worked on the right leg and Flair went after the left one but whatever. AJ uses an Indian Deathlock and bends back to more or less have his hands like you would for a reverse neckbreaker.

Benoit did that to Booker T once on Thunder and WCW went to a commercial just as he locked it in. Brilliance I tell you, brilliance. There’s the figure four that you knew was coming. Love that snap powerslam Joe does. I know I tend to skip around a lot on my reviewing but here’s my thought on why I don’t just list off play by play: if you wanted that, you could just go watch the match yourself.

Just thought I’d make that clear in case people think I fast forward and just watch pieces of the match. I write out what pops into my head and at times there isn’t much. Doesn’t mean the match is bad or anything but just nothing strikes me about it. And end of random tangent.

And Bischoff punches Flair. Ok then. Joe hits the Muscle Buster while this is happening and is ticked off that nothing can be done about it. Joe pulls Bischoff back in and walks into the Pele and the Clash for the pin. Flair demands that Bischoff raise AJ’s hand.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here but it was missing a little something that I just can’t place. This is another match that you just can’t mess up and they didn’t here. Another solid showing here and it was certainly worthy of being the world title match.

We recap the tournament to this point which seems like a way to kill 3 minutes.

Anderson is with the red hot Christy who talks very well again. He’s wearing a different shirt here too. I have no idea what he’s saying here as Christy is just ridiculously good looking here. The gum is a great touch for Anderson.

Pope is with JB. Ah I get why I hate Pope again: he talks once in awhile. I was liking him a bit earlier and that’s all gone now. And it’s Hall and X-Pac. TNA security running in to stop them reminds me of a Keystone Cops segment as they’re constantly chasing these two around the building trying to stop them from getting into the building. They say something to Hogan and it’s whatever. Does anyone care about them at this point?

8 Card Stud Finals: Mr. Anderson vs. D’Angelo Dinero

Pope takes forever getting out there because he got beaten up. Ok then. The referee starts counting and you know he’ll be there in time so this is kind of pointless. Yep there he is. Anderson beats on him on the ramp. Even money says they’ll brawl on the floor too. Hey they’re fighting on the floor! They haven’t actually been in the ring yet. AJ and Flair are watching in the back.

This has been ALL Anderson, making the ending a tad obvious. Pope of course is ok after that much of a beating. Most of the match is Anderson beating on Pope and there’s your comeback. The DDE gets two and Anderson is in control again. Pope uses an STO which is Kennedy’s finisher in reverse.

Kennedy cuts a promo mid match and stops to hit the Mic Check for two and a pop from the fans. That’s….a bit too much from Pope. Anderson misses a Swanton and Pope hits the double knees to the back. He REALLY needs a new finisher.

Rating: B. They kept it simple here and it worked. This was fun. That’s the best way to put it I think as it wasn’t particularly great or even very good but it was fun. That’s all you can ask for here I guess. Either way it worked fine though so all in all this was a good main event.

Overall Rating: B. This was a good show. It put me in mind of Survival of the Fittest that I did from ROH: nothing great but nothing resembling a bad match at all. This was solid and it worked rather well I thought. The whole show was based around the tournament and that’s all well and good. My main problem was how all of the tournament matches other than the final were so short.

They averaged about 8 minutes which just isn’t long enough for that many matches. That’s my only major criticism with the show. Other than that though, I liked this show and while it’s no classic or anything, it’s good. That’s how I would describe it: good. Check it out if you have some time to kill.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




On This Day: February 10, 2008 – Against All Odds 2008: A Rare One Outside Of Orlando

Against All Odds 2008
Date: February 10, 2008
Location: Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

 

I’ve actually done the show after this which is a rarity for me in these reviews since I more or less do random shows more often than not. Anyway this is one of the shows that wasn’t in the Impact Zone which is always kind of interesting to see. The main event is Angle vs. Christian with Angle defending the title and Joe as guest referee. Other than that the card looks as dull as ever. Let’s get to it.

 

We actually get the Star Spangled Banner with a big military thing. BG James and his dad Bob Armstrong (why do they have different last names?) are in the group of marines.

 

The opening video is about war or something like that. We see clips of presidents saying things that have nothing to do with war at times. Uh there’s something about barbed wire and the Hallelujah Chorus. This was in a word, odd.

 

Tag Titles: Bob Armstrong/BG James vs. AJ Styles/Tomko

 

James (Road Dogg) won the Feast or Fired tag title shot and picked his 67 year old dad instead of Kip James (Billy Gunn, you know, his partner in one of the most successful teams of all time) because TNA thinks we know who Bullet Bob Armstrong is or even stupider, that we care who he is. Members of the National Guard are at ringside. I’m trying to remember why there would be a very patriotic theme to this show and nothing is coming to me.

 

AJ is the Prince of Phenomenal and a clueless putz at this point. Aj wants an explanation from Tomko about why he hasn’t called AJ this week and has been hanging out with Christian so much. I’ll spare you all a lot of jokes here. Tomko says worry about the tag match, not anything. Armstrong looks like he’s waiting in line at a soup kitchen or something.

 

James vs. AJ to start. Very basic stuff to start as AJ acts like an idiot and James drills him. Oh dear it’s Armstrong time. Armstrong slaps AJ down and it’s off to Tomko. More slaps abound and we thankfully get someone in there that isn’t on Social Security. And yes I get that Armstrong probably used to be very good. That being said, he’s pushing 70 here. I get that he may want to do this and may be in great shape, but the problems here are numerous.

 

First off, he’s 67 years old. Do you think it’s safe for a man born in the 30s to be in there against men that are much stronger and faster and in better condition? I don’t care how well trained he is or how great shape he’s in. It’s too much of a safety risk for my taste.

 

Second, this is taking up ring time from ANYONE else that could use it. Having it be his dad is nice and sweet but no one knows who he is, this is a one off appearance, no one cares it’s just pointless all around.

 

Third, it makes AJ and Tomko look bad because every spot with Armstrong in there they have to sell like crazy for him. Also they have to slow things WAY down for him to keep up with them. Again, if you want him there as manager or support etc, fine but let someone that isn’t more trouble than they’re worth be out there. I’ve never been a fan of matches like these in the slightest. Point being here, where Tomko, the enforcer for the top heel in the company, is having to sell for a man that hasn’t been a regular competitor in years.

 

It takes AJ interfering to let Tomko take over. Kurt and Karen are watching. AJ gets two on Armstrong. Now we get to see the monster known as Tomko hammer on a man older than Pearl Harbor. Off to James and AJ now and there are the punches. AJ misses a springboard forearm and it hits Tomko. Pumphandle for two on AJ. Styles manages to get a dropkick to the knee though and the champions’ finisher, the Tornado Plex (Combination spinning neckbreaker/side suplex) ends James.

 

Rating: D. This is a glorified handicap match and a bad one at that. Road Dogg is a guy that I liked in the ring despite him not being focused on as far as his wrestling went. However he was in way over his head here as he had to carry his dad the entire time. I’m sorry but I do not see the point of this at all and I don’t know anyone that doesn’t work for TNA that does either.

 

Karen is panicking and she screeches a lot. She wants to know when’s the last time Kurt did something special for her. Kurt says whenever she’s in his presence it’s special. It’s so weird to think they would be divorced later in the year.

 

We run down the card.

 

We recap Traci Brooks vs. Payton Banks, both of whom worked for Robert Roode. Allegedly he hit Traci so she left him. This is the required grudge match.

 

Payton Banks vs. Traci Brooks

 

Banks is awful and Brooks is only good at coming out to a knockoff of Rag Doll by Aerosmith. Traci slaps her and takes her into the corner to start us off. Total brawl to start so far as it’s mainly just pounding and choking. We hit the floor for awhile which gives us more brawling. All Traci so far. How exactly do you hit someone with authority?

 

Payton takes over and we go back into the ring. Backcracker gets two. Crowd is totally behind Traci here. She gets a bad running kick to take over. Traci goes up but Banks knocks her off and continues her punching. Ah never mind as Traci grabs a quick schoolgirl for the pin after nothing of note at all.

 

Rating: D+. Well they were clearly trying. They had some aggression out there but at the same time the lack of skill kind of hurt them. Again, Traci is one of those chicks that needs to just stick to wearing tight or non-existent clothing. This wasn’t the worst match ever, but it’s nothing good at all.

 

We recap Steiner vs. Petey Williams. They both had Feast or Fired cases and Steiner elected to trade his out of fear. Naturally he had the world title shot and now wanted it back. Williams is Maple Leaf Muscle at this point. The winner gets both cases.

 

Scott Hudson of all people talks to both guys. Apparently the other case was the X-Division Title shot. Petey lists off why he’s awesome and Steiner says he’s had more matches defending his matches with his world title than Williams has had matches. And yes that’s how he said it.

 

Petey Williams vs. Scott Steiner

 

Petey likes to copy Scott which he was told not to do pre-match. They pose for a bit which is a bit more disturbing than it should be. Steiner easily overpowers him of course so Petey tries to speed things up a bit which doesn’t work either. Some strikes work a bit for Petey but it’s hard to fight against a big overhead belly to belly. Elbow and pushups follow.

 

Another belly to belly off the top gets two but Steiner pulls him up. Steiner gets an Angle Slam off the top but again pulls Williams up. He goes to the floor and gets the two cases, wedging them between the ropes as you often see done with chairs. The referee stops him but Williams manages to shove Steiner into the case. Rana takes Steiner down for two. Canadian Destroyer is countered into an Alabama Slam for a long two.

 

Steiner Recliner can’t get on though as Williams rolls him up instead for two. Williams hits a dropkick and a slingshot Codebreaker to set up a top rope crossbody for two. Williams puts on the Steiner Recliner which is as miserable of a chinlock as I’ve ever seen. Tornado DDT gets two for Williams. Steiner gets sent into the other case and a missile dropkick puts down Steiner. Rhaka Khan debuts and distracts Petey so that a Last Ride can end Petey.

 

Rating: C-. Better match than you would expect but Steiner was never in any real danger here. I never got the appeal of mini Steiner in the form of Williams. Steiner never really went anywhere until the Mafia came up. This was watchable but at the same time it wasn’t anything great at all.

 

Kurt is ticked about Karen leaving him earlier. Jeremy has a book coming out apparently and is going to give Kurt tips. JB plays Kurt and Kurt plays Karen. Is this supposed to be funny? Kurt slaps him and says he needs something bigger. Thursday is Valentine’s Day and JB suggests they renew their vows on Impact. This is getting downright creepy. Naturally AJ comes in and it’s not funny.

 

We get a video about the Drinking Championship and Eric “training” for it at bars. This is of course, stupid.

 

World Beer Drinking Championship: James Storm vs. Eric Young

 

One very awesome thing is that you can tell that Storm and Roode’s songs were merged together to make Beer Money’s music today. That’s very awesome. Yes this is an official championship match. The belt has a beer bottle attached to it. I hate to admit it but the pyro fear thing makes me smile. Storm jumps Young as he high fives fans and we need a bell. Hey there’s a bell!

 

Young gets a Thesz Press out of nowhere to get some punches in. A clotheslines sends Storm to the floor so Young can hit a top rope cross body to really take over. Jackie is out there too and being her usual irritating self. Back in and Storm is able to spit beer in his face thanks to Jackie’s interference.

 

Storm gets an enziguri to the head and it sends Eric to the floor. Hiptoss to Young on the exposed concrete gets two back in the ring. We head to the floor again and Young gets a suplex onto the concrete. Storm gets an Orton DDT back in the ring for two. Apparently the barbed wire massacre match is going to be in the Impact Zone due the athletic commission in this state, meaning it’ll be taped.

 

Storm in control here until he misses a charge in the corner and here comes Eric one more time. Belly to belly by Eric gets two. This is a better match than it probably should be. What it has to do with drinking is beyond me but whatever. A front flip from the top misses by Storm but Eric’s moonsault hits for two.

 

I hate when that happens: big spots like those should end matches. Jackie comes in, her head goes into Roode’s balls and a Death Valley Driver to both at once gets two. See what I mean? Jackie tries to interfere and Rhyno pops up, returning from his relapse with alcohol I believe, and Gores Storm so Young can get the pin to retain.

 

Rating: D+. This was good until the ending when it got stupid with the kicking out every five seconds. Rhyno returning set up more of him vs. Storm which is a stupid feud over a stupid concept. Either way this was just ok but the big spots being kicked out of every time got annoying.

 

Rhyno says he’ll explain things on Thursday.

 

A chick is with Jim Cornette at the Impact Zone. Apparently this was taped almost three weeks prior. He shows us how sharp the barbed wire is.

 

We recap ODB vs. Awesome Kong. Kong is the new champion and ODB is the one chick she hasn’t beaten. End of storylines.

 

Knockouts Title: ODB vs. Awesome Kong

 

They pull each others’ hair and ODB tries a slam which fails completely. ODB hits the floor and Raisha Saed, Kong’s mouthpiece, gets in her face. Back in and ODB is sent into the corner and a splash crushes her. Out to the floor again with Kong in control but her knee is hurting. ODB grabs her chest which is enough to wake her up somehow.

 

This is dull if you didn’t get that. Kong tries the powerbomb but ODB fights her off and sits on the top rope. Kong hits the spinning backfist to the head and we’re back on the mat again. Thesz Press is caught so ODB, who isn’t a small girl by any means, tries a dropkick. The Thesz Press from the middle rope gets her down though but she still can’t slam Kong. Implant Buster gets two.

 

ODB nips up to avoid a middle rope splash and slams Kong for two. Gee maybe if it was bigger than a slam it would have worked. She gets a shot from her flask to wake her up. ODB can’t put Kong down still though. She hits Saed though and there’s the spinning backfist and the Awesome Bomb from Kong to retain.

 

Rating: D-. This was sloppy, dull, not interesting and just weak overall. They tried but the similarity of styles hurt it too much. You need power vs. speed rather than power vs. power. It took the Beautiful People to stop Kong and they were a breath of air into the division. This was pretty weak though.

 

James Mitchell says he’s going to send Mesias in and Abyss is going to be in pain. This feud went on so far too long that it’s unreal. Mitchell could certainly talk though.

 

We recap this part of the feud. There was something about Abyss shooting his father who was James Mitchell and he and Mesias are brothers or something. It’s a huge mess if you didn’t get that part.

 

Judas Mesias vs. Abyss

 

This was taped three weeks ago and is in the Impact Zone down in Orlando. There aren’t any ropes but rather barbed wire. Abyss pushes over a cameraman on the way to the ring. For some reason that made me chuckle. The fans are behind Abyss here. Well that’s good since he’s the face. The lack of ropes makes things look really weird here.

 

Abyss does the arm pose and Mesias looks at him. It’s weird seeing the face tower over the heel like he does here. They fight to try to push the other into the wire but neither has any luck. Mesias hits a dropkick and Abyss hits wire, cutting his arm a bit. Mesias goes in also, but in his case it’s side first. Drop toehold sends Abyss into the wire. This is going to be one of those matches where all we’re doing is sending people into the wire isn’t it?

 

Abyss slides under the wire as the fans chant who’s your daddy. He finds a chair wrapped in barbed wire and the fans want blood apparently. Abyss puts the chair on the chest of Mesias but it goes into Abyss’ crotch. That has to hurt a bit no? Barbed wire chair to Abyss’ head. BIG cut over the eye of Abyss.

 

Mesias brings in a barbed wire board with a slight bit of help from Mitchell. They’re on the floor now with Mesias in control. Abyss finds another board and Mesias is bleeding from the side. The new board is set up between the railing and the table like a platform. Abyss tries to chokeslam Mitchell through it but gets blocked by Mesias and it’s back into the ring. Chokeslam onto the barbed wire is blocked but a gorilla press drop isn’t and Mesias is all cut up.

 

Abyss’ arms are a mess. There’s ANOTHER barbed wire board being brought in by Abyss. Mesias gets up on the apron so Abyss chokeslams him down onto the board that was set up like a platform. Time for Abyss to go after Mitchell now and it’s a Black Hole Slam for the manager. Mesias pops up somehow and it’s a Black Hole Slam for him too.

 

Abyss gets hit low to shift the momentum again. Mesias more or less tackles Abyss into the boards for Abyss’ first major bump of the match. They slug it out and Mesias thinks it’s smart to charge at a guy whose finisher is a swinging slam. It connects onto one of the boards and this is over.

 

Rating: C+. Well they got the violence stuff pretty well I guess. All things considered this was pretty good. Thankfully this feud was OVER after this as I couldn’t take much more from it. Tenay saying that Abyss could be added to the list of hardcore legends like Funk, Brody, Cactus Jack and the Sheik is a big nauseating but you get the idea. Better than you would expect but just what you would expect if that makes sense.

 

Robert Roode blames Booker for Sharmell’s injury. Also she looks like a horse. Not a bad promo as it was simple but effective.

 

We recap the feud which more or less is Roode accidentally hit Sharmell at the PPV last month. This feud went on forever and it never got particularly interesting, mainly due to the girls in it being non-wrestlers. Roode said it wasn’t his fault and he said that Booker should be thankful.

 

Booker says nothing of note.

 

Robert Roode vs. Booker T

 

Sharmell isn’t here due to the injuries. Booker goes straight for Roode as it’s a brawl to start. A brawl in TNA? NO WAY!!! Side slam by Booker is one of the first break in a lot of punches. Roode has had virtually no offense in nearly two minutes. He’s thrown to the floor where Payton Banks tries to tend to him. Back in the ring and Roode FINALLY gets some offense in.

 

Nothing special but at least it’s a change in the pace here. And never mind as Booker reverses and kicks his head off after being on defense for about 30 seconds. Banks gets in the ring for no apparent reason and Booker almost does what Roode did to Sharmell the previous month. The distraction lets Roode take over though and he has his first real advantage all match.

 

Knee to the ribs puts Booker down for two. A clothesline is almost countered into a Book End but Roode reverses. Dropkick gets two on Booker and we hit the chinlock. Booker fights up and gets a superkick and a spin kick to put Roode down again. Spinebuster sets up the Spinarooni. Dang he’s so angry he almost forgot to break dance.

 

Booker kicks Roode in the leg for no apparent reason and Roode rakes the eyes so they can slug it out for a few seconds. Scissors Kick misses but Roode is backdropped to the floor. The brawl is on the floor until Roode is thrown back in. And never mind as he goes through the other side and they head up the ramp. Yep it’s a double countout. Screw me running.

 

Rating: D. The match was just ok but the ending cripples this. It was nothing great anyway until then and all this means is it sets up a mixed tag later to end this feud that I think went on even longer afterwards. This was a feud I never got into and didn’t really care at all. Weak match, awful ending.

 

They fight more in the back as Roode tries to get away. Roode throws Banks out of the driver seat of a car and speeds away in it.

 

We get a video on the main event which is completely pointless.

 

Kurt tells AJ and Karen about the renewal of their vows. This would result in AJ accidentally marrying Karen. Just go with it. Karen leaves and Kurt talks to Christian and says this is his last shot and that once Kurt wins he’s in charge. Oh and Joe better stay out of Kurt’s way.

 

We recap Team 3D vs. the X-Division. Team 3D has Johnny Devine, the X-Division traitor and its champion with them. The deal is it’s a street fight and if Team 3D/Devine win then the X-Division is gone. If the X guys win then Team 3D can’t wrestle until they’re under 275lbs each. Oh and if an X guy gets the win they get the title. Not sure if they have to pin Devine or not.

 

Bubba says that Lethal has heart but the Guns don’t. This is supposed to be a very serious promo but it doesn’t come off as one for some reason.

 

Jay Lethal/Motor City Machineguns vs. Team 3D/Johnny Devine

 

This is a hardcore street fight and Lethal had been rapidly rising through the ranks recently. I’d expect a showcase match for him here. It seems that any X guy can pin any evildoer to win the title because that’s how wrestling titles are supposed to be right? As expected it starts in the aisle. It’s Lethal vs. Ray on the table. Now those two are in the ring. The other four are off fighting…somewhere.

 

Lethal in control as the Guns are in the ring now. There’s a sign that says USE MY SIGN. Lethal takes it and it’s a Dead End street sign underneath the paper. Triple plancha by the X guys to take out the heels on the floor in a cool spot. Everyone in the ring now as the X guys have controlled the whole time. Triple Tornado DDT get 2’s all around. Someone brings in the weapons including an inflatable woman. Oh dear.

 

The kitchen sink is brought in of course because that’s been funny the last 19 times it’s been done right? Another triple cover gets two. The Dudleys get a double suplex on Lethal. The heels take over and the fans want tables. The X Guys take over again for a bit. This is one of those messes of a match which has no flow at all and is just a big fight that goes back and forth.

 

3D to Sabin and one for Shelley as well. Lethal takes D-Von down but Ray kills him with a clothesline. The fans still want tables. So Cal Val is crying over Lethal. This is before she turned on him I guess. Lethal flips off Ray as Val tries to intervene. Ray grabs her by the hair and whips out a cheese grater. He licks her face for no apparent reason until Lethal can make the save.

 

Big chair shot to the head of Ray by Lethal but D-Von pulls the referee out just in time. Remember what I said about Lethal doing this on his own? It’s literally 3-1 at this point and Lethal is getting near falls out there. Lethal Combination gets two on Devine and then he gets two on D-Von. He walks into a Bubba Bomb though which somehow only gets two. Dude the Guns have been down what, five minutes now on those 3Ds?

 

D-Von sets up the tables and the Dudleys are suddenly faces. Lethal fights off the Dudleys again but here’s Devine with that street sign. Jay gets it and pops Devine over the head with it, sending him to the table. Top rope elbow through the table and through Devine saves the X-Division. This match ran twelve and a half minutes and I kid you not it was 3-1 for at least four of those.

 

Rating: C+. Lethal dominance aside this was ok. The ending is completely absurd and Lethal looks way too good here, but the main issue is that this went on too long. The match was too wild and the first half is very hard to follow. Still though, not bad although I wasn’t bored at all with it. Exciting but not good for the most part, but I think that was the point so I’ll let it slide.

 

Sonjay Dutt comes out to celebrate with Lethal.

 

We get the same main event recap from earlier.

 

Christian says he knows more than everyone else. Oh and no one knows who Hudson is still which is kind of funny. Christian says Joe deserves a title shot but not tonight because this is Christian’s night.

 

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Christian Cage

 

Samoa Joe is the Special Enforcer which he’ll get a title shot in exchange for being. After the Big Match Intros it’s time to go. Karen is at ringside as is Joe. They slap it out a bit in the ring and it’s a long feeling out process. Kurt controls with a headlock on the mat as we’re waiting on something to actually happen. Angle takes Christian down with a shoulder and it’s back to the headlock, but time by Christian though.

 

Belly to back gets two but Christian moves out of it and back to the headlock. Joe is on the floor and looks rather bored. Somebody get that boy a Twinkie before he passes out. On another note, more headlock. Kurt is sent into the post and Christian dives off the top to crush Kurt on the floor. Back in the ring now with Christian taking too much time and getting dropped on his shoulder from the middle rope.

 

Joe gets out of his chair and gets on the apron a bit which disrupts Kurt’s mojo a bit and it’s back to Christian. And never mind as he gets suplexed up and over the top rope. Kurt tries to get a weapon but Joe knocks it out of his hand and shoves Kurt down. Christian takes over again but Kurt grabs an Angle Slam out of nowhere and drops him on the apron with it. Sick bump there.

 

Back in and Angle gets a buckle bomb for two. Off to a body scissors by Kurt now as we need a breather I guess. I can live with that as they’ve been going for about ten minutes now. Rolling Germans by Kurt has Christian reeling. He manages to reverse the third one though and Kurt is flipped over his head and lands on his face in a nice bump. They hit the ropes a lot and Kurt runs into a flapjack. Edge-o-Matic gets two.

 

The Canadian goes up top and Christian tries the running the corner suplex but Christian bites the head and hits a frog splash for two. Angle Slam is reversed into an arm drag and we hit the floor. Kurt tries to German him off the apron but Christian holds the ropes for dear life. Back in the ring there’s the ankle lock and Christian is in trouble. There’s a rope though and we’re back to Kurt being in control.

 

Straps go down but the Angle Slam is reversed into a sunset flip for two. Angle rakes the eyes and this time gets the Slam for two. Well of course it was only for two. Moonsault misses and Christian goes up. Running suplex misses but the second time he manages to get a Samoan Drop from the top for two. Angle gets in his face but Christian is able to grab an Unprettier out of nowhere for a long two.

 

The referee takes a clothesline and Christian grabs the ankle lock. Joe comes in as the replacement referee and checks for the tap. Karen tries to help but gets pulled in as well. Christian lets go of the hold and gets slapped by the chick. Kurt saves his wife and Christian gets a rollup on Kurt for two. Karen gets knocked down and a double clothesline takes down both guys.

 

Joe puts Karen in a chair at ringside and here’s AJ for the interference. Joe grabs AJ off the apron and they fight into the crowd. Kurt grabs a chair while those two fight in the audience (read as Joe massacres him). Christian gets the chair but also takes a low blow. Tomko runs in to save Christian from the chair shot and then turns on Christian, hitting a spinning neckbreaker. Angle wakes up the referee and gets the pin to retain.

 

Rating: B-. Well it was good but at the same time it was overbooked beyond belief. It was way too overdone with there being Karen, Joe, AJ and Tomko all getting involved as I guess a 20 minute match between Angle and Christian wasn’t good enough. This was pretty good but the angles in the main event at this time were pretty bad as everyone and their mother knew it was just wasting time until we got to Joe vs. Angle with Joe taking the title. Good wrestling, bad booking.

 

Ad for TNA I guess ends the show.

 

Overall Rating: D. I watched this on Wednesday and Thursday and now it’s about 11:40 on Thursday night and I don’t remember half of the card. This was not only forgettable but once I did remember it, it was bad. This didn’t work for the most part as everything was either bad or forgettable. The best match is the main event and that’s just slightly ahead of ok. It’s not much of a show but this wasn’t the best era for TNA at all. Everything was a mess and nothing was incredibly easy to care about. Anyway, there’s another TNA PPV for you all.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my ebook of 1998 Monday Night Raw Reviews on Amazon at:




Impact Wrestling – January 3, 2013: Just What Aces and 8’s Needs

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 3, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Todd Kenely, Tazz

We open the new year with the return (yes another one) of Sting. Rather than let us be surprised by who wins, TNA has decided to throw the name out there ahead of time. The other issue is that Anderson may or may not be joining Aces and 8’s. That would help their star power but somehow make them more boring at the same time. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap kills some time.

We open with the Superstar of the Year presentation. The nominees are Ray, Storm, Aries, Roode and of course Hardy. To the shock of no one other than Aries or Roode, Hardy wins. Roode and Aries were arguing to the ring when the announcement was made and the two of them being shocked was funny stuff. Hardy says that this award means just as much as being champion, which draws Roode into the ring to yell.

When Roode was champion, NOTHING was more important to him than the title. He made history and set records when he was champion but here’s Aries to argue that HE should be the winner because he averaged over four stars per PPV match. Hardy calms things down and says he’ll defend against both of them at Genesis, which I think is the first match announced. Aries jumps him but gets in an argument with Roode over who gets to beat Hardy up. Aries tries to hit Jeff with the trophy but blasts Roode instead, bending the gold part on top. Hardy takes out Aries and leaves.

Storm is disappointed but Bad Influence comes in and makes fun of a country song to show how sad Storm is in a hilarious bit. Storm says he’ll be back and he’ll kick Daniels in his Twitter and knock Kaz’s Facebook off. Kaz: “You forgot MySpace!”

Kazarian vs. James Storm

Daniels faked Storm out to start and Kaz got in a cheap shot to really start. That’s some nice chicanery there. Storm pounds away in the ring before we head to the floor where Daniels can cheat yet again. Back in and Storm comes back with Closing Time (Codebreaker) for no cover, instead opting for a Russian Leg Sweep and a top rope elbow for two. For the third time a Daniels distraction lets Kaz take over, this time with a TKO for two. Storm hits another Codebreaker out of nowhere and after taking out Daniels, hits the Last Call to a jumping Kaz for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: C. Storm continues to be kept away from the main event but it’s nice to see him overcoming the odds for a week and getting a clean pin. Also, it’s VERY nice to see Bad Influence fighting anyone other than AJ for all of eternity. Other than that though, the match was relatively dull with Storm just doing his thing and hitting his signature moves.

Anderson is told to make a decision by Aces and 8’s and after some prodding from Doc, he finally agrees. However, D-Von’s bat is missing.

Kenny King talks to Kid Kash about some mini tournament for the shot at RVD.

Quick highlight package on Sting and Aces and 8’s.

Here’s Doc to say that Sting needs to get out here so he can cripple Sting once and for all. A ball bat falls from the ceiling and Doc FREAKS, shouting that he isn’t afraid and demanding that Sting get out here as we take a break.

Brooke has no comment on her dad.

X-Division #1 Contenders Tournament: Kid Kash vs. Christian York

Kash jumps him to start and takes it to thef loor very quickly, only to get caught by a dropkick and a kick to the head from the apron. Kash pounds away a bit but York comes back with a botched handspring into a kick for two. A running low downward spiral gets two for Christian and he counters a backslide into the Mood Swing (Eve’s swinging neckbreaker) for the pin at 3:43.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see at all here as Kash continues to just be a warm body in the division. York isn’t much better and I’m not wild on these mini tournaments, especially when the finals and the title match are at the same show (Genesis obviously), it gets a little dull. Nothing to see here though.

Hernandez and Chavo aren’t scared of Morgan and Ryan.

Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

Morgan has a bad arm so Joey is subbing for him. Ok then.

Joey Ryan vs. Hernandez

Hernandez pounds away to start and Morgan’s arm appears to be fine. He comes in and hits a discus lariat on Hernandez for the DQ at 1:00.

Chavo gets taken down as well post match. Was there a point to this segment?

Angle thanks Brisco and Bischoff for having his back. Tonight it’s a cage match so they can hang back here. Joe yells at them for no apparent reason but Angle smooths things over.

We see the Knockouts stretching.

We recap Aries/Ray/the Hogans for the millionth time.

Here’s Hulk to apologize for being gone last week. He saw his daughter and Ray making out in the parking lot and he needed a breather. Hulk asks Brooke and Ray to come out here right now so here they are side by side and nearly arm in arm. Hulk wants an explanation right now and Ray says it was all on him. Papa Hogan GOES OFF on Ray, saying that he knew all along that Ray was a bad man. Apparently Ray broke some kind of code and he gets thrown out of the ring, just like Brooke. Ray is suspended as well. Is there a point to this coming ANYTIME soon?

Post break we recap what we just saw.

Back to OVW for more Joseph Park matches. He’s been watching a lot of tape and Danny Davis is starting to get the appeal of him. I think Park graduates.

Gail Kim/Tara vs. Mickie James/Miss Tessmacher

Tess is in all blue tonight which is a nice change of pace. She and Gail start but it’s quickly off to Tara. I do enjoy the camera closeups we get of the Knockouts unlike the Divas. Mickie comes in off a blind tag to clear the ring as Jesse consoles Tara. Back in for Tara vs. Mickie as we take a break. Back with Tessmacher getting the hot tag and cleaning house. Tara gets knocked to the floor where Jesse wipes her face, allowing Kim to deck Tessmacher from behind. Back to Kim legally for an over the shoulder back/rib breaker for two.

Gail misses a charge in the corner and falls to the floor but she still manages to block the hot tag. Tara comes in with the slingshot somersault legdrop for two and it’s off to a quick bow and arrow hold. Tessmacher slams Tara face first into the mat and we FINALLY get the hot tag to Mickie. House is cleaned and a neckbreaker on Kim gets two. Everything breaks down and Tessmacher dives on Jesse and Tara on the floor. Gail misses the same charge in the corner again and Mickie hits the MickieDT for the pin at 13:04.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here for the same four chicks we’ve seen fight for months. Is Velvet gone again, because we haven’t seen her in the ring for two weeks now. It still seems to be setting up Mickie to take the title off Tara, which makes Sky’s return worthless. Not a bad match here but there was no need for this to be over seven minutes, let alone thirteen.

Aces and 8’s say they have to stay masked.

ODB is glad Sting is back and says Young will be back soon.

We recap the announcement of the triple threat match at Genesis.

Hulk makes it a three way elimination in a segment that doesn’t need to exist. Next week it’s the two of them against Hardy and whoever Hardy can get.

Samoa Joe/Kurt Angle vs. D-Von/Masked Man

In a cage for absolutely no apparent reason. Doc slams the door on Angle as he gets in the ring, making it a handicap match to start. Joe beats on both guys in the ring as Doc keeps beating up Angle on the outside. D-Von charges into his partner in the corner so Joe can divide and conquer a bit. The numbers finally catch up to Joe and his comeback attempt is quickly stopped. Thankfully there’s no tagging in this. I can’t stand the idea of law and order in a cage match.

D-Von kicks the door into Angle’s head again as the beating continues. We take a break and come back with Joe still fighting both guys off on his own. To be fair it’s not like (presumably) Mike Knox and D-Von would be a huge challenge for a guy like Joe. Angle fights off Doc and gets the key to unlock the cage. Kurt cleans house but can’t get the mask off due to Doc making ANOTHER save. Angle is busted open now but he avoids D-Von’s headbutt. It’s time to roll some Germans on both bikers and the Angle Slam pins the masked man at 11:43.

Rating: C-. Again, why am I supposed to be surprised here? Joe and Angle are two of the biggest stars in TNA history and they’re beating up two guys with barely any singles success ever? This is supposed to be interesting? Nothing to see here for the most part and the cage is just there to try to add some drama I suppose.

Post match more bikers run in to beat down Angle and Joe as Anderson watches from the floor. Sting comes in with the bat to clean house with little fanfare. Aces and 8’s bail, but the masked man from the match is left alone. He gets triple teamed and the mask is pulled off to reveal Mike Knox, shocking ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. Gee, just what Aces and 8’s needs: ANOTHER FREAKING CAREER NOTHING. Tenay says Sting just took the power away from Aces and 8’s. Mike, go watch some CMLL or something. It’ll do you a lot of good.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the worst show in the world but it certainly wasn’t all that great either. At the end of the day, this show has become almost all about drama as we wait to get to next checkpoint in the Aces and 8’s story and any kind of a point at all in Hogan vs. Ray. Hulk is looking like a jerk in this whole thing which doesn’t really do much for Ray at all. Aces and 8’s are still Aces and 8’s as well, but now with two big guys with no career accomplishments. Nothing to see here but at least we FINALLY have some stuff set for Genesis.

Results

James Storm b. Kazarian – Last Call

Christian York b. Kid Kash – Mood Swing

Hernandez b. Joey Ryan via DQ when Matt Morgan interfered

Mickie James/Miss Tessmacher b. Tara/Gail Kim – MickieDT to Kim

Kurt Angle/Samoa Joe b. D-Von/Masked Man – Angle Slam to Masked Man

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Impact Wrestling – September 6, 2012: If You Build It, They Will Buy (Hopefully)

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 6, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the final night of the BFG Series and the final spots this Sunday are up for grabs. Other than that, not a ton matters. I’m sure we’ll hear more about the Aces and 8’s stuff from last week, but it’ll be minor to say the least. Also we’ll probably get more of the card set up for Sunday which is desperately needed at this point. Let’s get to it.

We get videos from everyone still in the running for the spots in the Series.

Bound For Glory Series Leaderboard

James Storm 73

Samoa Joe 68

Rob Van Dam 55

Bully Ray 55

AJ Styles 50

Jeff Hardy 49

Kurt Angle 48

Mr. Anderson 47

Christopher Daniels 33

Magnus 33

Robbie E 12

D’Angelo Dinero 7 (injured)

Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. Jeff Hardy

I think Joe has clinched a spot already. Jeff tries to work on the arm to start but gets shoved to the floor with ease. Joe follows out and rams Jeff into the steps, but a charge misses and Jeff dives at him off the steps with Poetry In Motion as we take a break. Back with Joe in control again. Apparently Hardy has to win by pin or submission to make it to the PPV and Joe needs a pin or submission to get the #1 spot and to be able to pick his opponent.

Joe hits his corner enziguri and Jeff sells it like he’s dead as always. That gets two so Joe pounds him down again but still only gets two. The fat man is getting frustrated and here comes Jeff’s comeback. He fires off some clotheslines and the mule kick as Joe can’t keep up with the speed all of a sudden. Jeff hits the legdrop between Joe’s legs and a low dropkick for two.

A jawbreaker looks to set up the Swanton but Joe gets up before it’s launched. Twist of Fate is countered into the Clutch but Jeff rams him into the buckle. The Whisper in the Wind hits Joe’s arm and there’s the Twisting Stunner into an arm trap headlock which gets the tap out for Hardy at 12:00.

Rating: B-. Another good match in the Series here although the ending wasn’t great. I think they were going with the shoulder injury from last week with Joe but they barely mentioned it so it was hard to remember. Good stuff here though and they’re both at the PPV anyway so it’s not like it matters much. I’m digging the end of the Series for one reason: the matches matter. That makes it so much better.

We recap Aces and 8’s attacking Aries lately.

Aries runs into Hogan in the back and is told the small guy that attacked him last week is here tonight. Aries has permission to do whatever he needs to take him out which pleases the champ.

Joe has something to say post match but Magnus interrupts him. Magnus says that as a team they were good but it was Joe’s fault they broke up. Magnus forgives Joe for it though and wishes him the best. He walks away and then jumps Joe from behind.

The candidates to face Daniels/Kaz are in the back for the begging to Hogan portion of our show. We have the Rob’s, Chavo/Hernandez and Gunner/Kid Kash. This is your tag team division in TNA people. After they bicker, AJ comes in and says he deserves a shot. Well he deserves them more than Kash/Gunner who already got beat by Chavo/Hernandez. Hogan eliminates AJ immediately. Ok then.

Brooke Hogan makes Tara vs. Tessmacher for the PPV. Brooke still can’t act at all. Gail comes in to yell at Brooke and we get Tara vs. Gail later.

Gail Kim vs. Tara

Well that was quick. Gail takes over to start with her usual kicks and a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner for two. Tara gets a quick sunset flip for two but Gail kicks her down again. A powerslam puts Kim down for no cover but a floatover suplex gets two for Tara. Gail tries to go up but gets caught in the Widow’s Peak off the top for the pin at 3:38.

Rating: C-. It’s absolutely mind blowing how much better this was than anything the Divas have done in months if not over a year. These chicks know how to wrestle a coherent match without looking like they’re going through a memorized script. They look natural is what I mean, and that’s the most important thing they can do.

We recap Joey Ryan’s Gut Check and attack of Snow.

Here’s Al Snow to call out Joey Ryan. Ryan happens to be here and gets in the ring. Snow says give him a mic then tells Ryan to shut up. Ryan has to go through Gut Check again but without judges. Joey says he has nothing to prove as Snow take his jacket off. Ryan finally accepts it but he has to fight Snow to get his contract. Joey says no one wants to see Snow in spandex anymore. Snow slaps Ryan down and Joey bails.

Bully Ray goes to see Joseph Park to ask what Park has found out about Aces and 8’s. Park can’t say because Sting and Hogan are the ones that hired him. Ray says be careful and that’s it.

A security guard puts a guy in a chair and leaves. Aries comes in and I think this is the guy that hit Aries last week. Aries says the guy better talk soon or else.

Back to Hogan’s office and Gunner/Kash are eliminated. Thank goodness.

Bound For Glory Series: Rob Van Dam vs. Bully Ray

Basically it’s winner gets in and loser is out. Ray takes over to start but they’re going very slowly so as not to make any mistakes. Van Dam starts speeding things up and fires off some kicks for two. Ray heads to the floor so Rob hits a big flip dive to take both guys down. Back in and Rob goes up, only to get crotched. Ray tries to pull him down but Van Dam’s leg gets caught in the ropes. Ray pounds away on it for a bit and it’s off to a a leg lock.

The Bully and Hebner get in an argument, allowing Van Dam to hit a shot out of the corner to take over. He pounds Ray in the head and clotheslines him down a few times before hitting the step over spinwheel kick. Rolling Thunder hits for two and a monkey flip out of the corner puts Ray down. Van Dam tries a kick off the middle rope but Ray avoids it and kicks Rob’s head off for two. A Vader Bomb misses and now Van Dam hits the kick he missed a few seconds ago. Van Dam goes up but dives into the Bubba Cutter for the pin at 8:54. Why would Rob dive with Ray already on his feet?

Rating: C+. Pretty good match here as Ray continues to be solid in the ring most of the time. More than anything else, this was a clean win. Rob isn’t going to lose his reaction from the crowd and Ray isn’t going to be pushed into being a face because of it. He won a match clean and there’s nothing wrong with that. Pay attention WWE.

The four in the Series on Sunday are Storm, Joe, Hardy and Ray.

Back to the interrogation. The guy is named Mike and he’s a freelance grip from New York. Aries wants to know what the boss wants with Aries and the title. He pulls out a pair of pliers and threatens to take Mike’s teeth out but Hogan comes in to stop it. Hogan goes after the guy but gets a call, apparently from Aces and 8’s. They want Mike back but Hogan wants the arm breaker one on one with Austin in a trade later. Aries gets the arm breaker on Sunday in exchange for Mike.

Here’s Storm to announce who he faces at the PPV. Storm talks about how he lost at Lockdown and went home but his friends thought something was missing. Then he came back here and beat Crimson before entering the BFG Series. Now he’s on top of that and he has three potential opponents. He asks the three of them to come out and gets his wish all at once. Storm talks about Hardy and Joe before picking Ray. Ray comes to the ring and Storm says he’s getting even for last year when Ray eliminated him.

Rob is in the back with Christy when Magnus comes up and says he thinks Rob isn’t who he used to be. Rob pops him in the jaw and they brawl a bit.

Tag Titles: Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. ???/???

It’s Chavo/Hernandez of course. The champions are run out of the ring very quickly and the challengers take over to start. Hernandez and Daniels start and it’s quickly off to Chavo with a slingshot hilo ala Eddie. Back to Hernandez for a bearhug into a belly to belly suplex. Daniels gets in just enough offense on Chavo to tag in Kaz but a hip toss stops him as well. The challengers are tagging in and out very fast. Apparently their name is Tex Mex. Why not I guess.

Daniels comes back in for a few seconds and gets beaten up as well so it’s back to Kaz who gets caught in the over the shoulder backbreaker. Hernandez does the delayed vertical while Chavo hits the Three Amigos on Daniels at the same time. That was pretty awesome. The champs are reeling and we take a break. Back with Daniels beating on Chavo before tagging in Kaz again. A running flip neckbreaker puts Chavo down and it’s back to Daniels who throws him to the floor.

Kaz hooks a double chickenwing but Chavo fights out of it and rolls into the corner to tag Hernandez. There’s the slingshot shoulder and he runs over both champions with ax handles. He and Sheamus have a few similarities in the ring. Hernandez badly screws up an Alpha Bomb and heads up. Chavo hurricanranas his own partner onto Kaz for two as Daniels makes the save.

Chavo dives onto Kaz on the floor as Daniels hits a palm strike to Hernandez. Daniels heads to the floor and Hernandez hits a HUGE dive to take both of them out. Kaz gets splashed in the corner and Daniels brings in a title belt. Hernandez picks up Kaz for something but a belt shot to the ribs lets Kaz roll up SuperMex for the pin at 14:47.

Rating: B. Good stuff here for a match with all of 20 seconds of notice. Daniels and Kaz are better on the mic than they are in the ring which says a lot given how good they are in the ring. I wasn’t expecting much coming into this and they surprised me which is always something fun to see.

Hulk comes out immediately and makes the tag champs vs. Angle/Styles for Sunday.

We run down the card for the PPV. Ion defends against Dutt, RVD vs. Magnus, the Knockouts, the tag titles, the Knockouts and the BFG stuff.

Here’s Aries with Mike to make the deal. He talks about wanting to fight the guy who broke his arm on Sunday but gets impatient. Instead of making the deal, he’s just going to beat Mike until Mike talks. Mike says he’ll talk but a big guy from Aces and 8’s comes out to save him. The big guy knocks Mike out cold before he can talk and brawls with Aries to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Another good show here as they managed to build most of a card for Sunday while still building up angles at the same time. Getting Aces and 8’s in the ring on Sunday was the next step they had to take eventually and it not being for the title is fine. Given that there’s nothing on the line on Sunday in that match and I still want to see it is a good sign. I’m impressed by how well they did things tonight and that’s a good sign.

Results
Jeff Hardy b. Samoa Joe – Arm trap headlock

Tara b. Gail Kim – Widow’s Peak

Bully Ray b. Rob Van Dam – Bubba Cutter

Christopher Daniels/Kazarian b. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero – Rollup after a belt shot to Hernandez

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Impact Wrestling – August 30, 2012: One Of The Best Impacts Ever

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 30, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

Tonight is likely to be about Aces and 8’s again, but they really need to talk about the PPV. If my math is right, there’s only one match announced, and that’s the finals of the BFG Series, which may or may not be three matches. Other than that though, I don’t think anything is set. Then again it’s a throwaway show anyway. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s show. This is followed by the ending brawl from last week’s show where Aries’ hand/arm was broken.

Here’s Aries to open things up. He has a cast on his right hand but he holds the title up with it anyway. Aries talks about Aces and 8’s pulling off something major last week. He isn’t medically cleared to wrestle tonight, but he can fight. Also, they broke his right hand, but he punches with his left. Aries wants the leader to come out here tonight and fight him.

Instead (I hope) here are Hogan and Sting. Hogan rants about Aces and 8’s and thanks Sting for helping while Hogan was gone. Hulk is in charge again and says Aries can have whatever he wants. Aries says he wants the boss of Aces and 8’s again and here they are on the monitor. They seem to be celebrating and the leader says they’ll do things on their own time. They’ll be out here later on.

ODB calls Eric and says that if he doesn’t call back in ten minutes, they’re done. There’s no call and ODB says he has another five minutes. It goes over and hour and it’s still not over. She gives him until next week and wants fried chicken.

Bound For Glory Series Leaderboard

James Storm 66

Samoa Joe 61

Rob Van Dam 55

Bully Ray 55

AJ Styles 50

Kurt Angle 48

Mr. Anderson 47

Jeff Hardy 42

Christopher Daniels 33

Magnus 28

Robbie E 12

D’Angelo Dinero 7

Bound For Glory Series: Rob Van Dam vs. James Storm

Basically if Van Dam wins he clinches a spot in the final four but he still has another shot. Storm is more or less a lock already. Apparently whoever has the most points gets to pick who he faces in the semi-finals at No Surrender. Ok so it’s three matches at the PPV. Feeling out process to start with Storm getting a small advantage via a headlock. A kick from Van Dam and a forearm from Storm get two each.

They both fire away in the corner and no one can get an advantage again. Apparently whoever loses between Angle and Hardy is out of the running. Van Dam sends him to the floor and hits a big dive to take Storm out as we take a break. Back with Storm hitting a clothesline for two. Van Dam kicks him down again and hits Rolling Thunder for another near fall.

A running DDT from Storm gets another two and Eye of the Storm gets the same. Van Dam sends him into the corner and hits a yelling monkey flip to put Storm down. This is good back and forth stuff. Rob tries another monkey flip in the other corner but jumps into the superkick. It hit the chest but it gets the pin for Storm at 11:13.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here although the lack of transitions and the finish bring it down a bit. Still though, these two had good chemistry out there and it basically locks up a spot in the final four for Storm while giving Van Dam a need to win over whoever he faces next week. Good solid match here.

Here’s Madison who says she has her rematch for the title tonight. That’s not what she gets though.

ODB vs. Madison Rayne

ODB spits the liquid courage at Madison and starts very fast. The Bam (TKO) finishes this in 25 seconds.

Post match here’s Eric in a suit with fried chicken. He wants to leave with her but ODB doesn’t like the suit because that’s not the Eric she married. Eric doesn’t like it either so he strips. ODB eats chicken and jumps on him.

AJ says he’s glad the Clair stuff is behind him. Right now though, he’s focusing on the BFG Series.

The judges debate the Gut Check guy from last week. They don’t seem that impressed.

Hogan and Sting debate who gets to do something. Hogan wants a slow buildup to whatever they’re doing. Sting waves in Daniels and Kaz who beg to not be fired. Hogan yells at them a lot and says they’re what’s wrong with this business today. No, not really Hulk. They have to defend the titles sometime soon apparently. Sting scares the appletini out of Daniels’ glass to send the champions away. Hogan and Sting argue over the use of each others’ catchphrases.

Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles

This should be good. Feeling out process to start but Joe blocks the drop down/kick because he knows AJ that well. AJ bails to the floor for a second before coming back in to continue feeling each other out. A clothesline puts AJ down but he nips up into a headscissors to send Joe into the corner. Joe is too heavy to suplex, but Joe misses a kick and AJ goes for the leg.

Joe kicks AJ off so AJ dropkicks Joe’s head off to send him to the floor. There’s a bit dive but Joe kicks him on the way down. AJ looks like he got snapped by a very wet towel. Back in and the snap powerslam gets two for the Samoan from LA. AJ gets chopped down and there’s an STF from the fat one. That doesn’t work so Joe switches over to the Rings of Saturn. AJ finally gets a rope so Joe kicks his head off.

The backsplash misses so AJ hits the springboard forearm. He Pele’s the arm that Magnus injured with the chair a few weeks back but Joe blocks a cross armbreaker. AJ charges at Joe in the corner, only to get Rock Bottomed down. The Clutch is countered into a pair of rollups for two but the second is countered into the Clutch but it’s not fully on. AJ escapes that and puts on the armbreaker, but Joe rolls on top of him for the pin at 8:10.

Rating: B. These two are good by definition and I really liked this one. Give this another five to eight minutes and it’s a classic. The idea of AJ going for the submission is a logical idea given the points system and Joe being able to counter all of them was the perfect story to go with. See? Psychology isn’t that hard and it works very well.

Time for Gut Check. Lewie says that he gave his best effort but also says he gets better every day. Taz says no. Pritchard says no as well thank goodness. Joey ryan pops up with a megaphone and goes off on Snow before throwing a drink on him. Snow has to be held back. That doesn’t last long and Snow chases Ryan out of the arena.

Joseph Park asks Sting and Hogan if he can investigate Aces and 8’s. Hulk agrees, presumably to get Park to leave him alone.

Bound For Glory Series: Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle

Both guys basically have to win. They have a ton of time too so this should be good. Angle almost immediately takes Hardy to the mat and puts on an armbar. Hardy counters into one of his own but Kurt will have none of that. Jeff headscissors him to the floor and hits a clothesline off the apron to take both guys down. Jeff kicks him in the corner but Kurt comes out with a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Hardy using his fast paced comeback, including the legdrop between the legs and a low dropkick for two. That just fires Kurt up and it’s rolling Germans time. Hardy comes back with a Twisting Stunner for two followed by the Whisper in the Wind for the same. Angle snaps off a belly to belly and there go the straps.

A big Angle Slam gets two and why is Kurt surprised by that? Seriously, why? Ankle lock is countered into a rollup and a Twist of Fate. Swanton hits perfectly but only gets a very close two. Ankle lock is countered again and the mule kick looks to set up the Swanton again, but Kurt runs the ropes. Jeff shoves him off (good thing too as Angle was in the middle of the ring) and the second Swanton gets the pin at 11:15.

Rating: B. I know Angle does the same formula to almost all of his matches, but dang is it a good formula. This was the second great match of the night which is more than you get in almost any TV show anymore. When Hardy has someone in there to keep him grounded, he’s one of the best there is and that’s what he got here. Very good match.

Angle is eliminated from the Series now.

JB introduces the final five people who could still make No Surrender: Hardy, RVD, Samoa Joe, Bully Ray and James Storm. Next week it’s Hardy vs. Joe and RVD vs. Ray. Storm has already locked in his spot at No Surrender. No word on who has to do what to win.

Here’s Aries to close the show. Instead of the leader of Aces and 8’s, we get Hogan again. I really don’t like the way that seems to be going. The final five are behind Hogan and Sting on the stage. Scratch that as Styles is there too and Ray is next to Sting and Hogan. Hogan wants to see the faces of Aces and 8’s. Aries says he wants the ugly one but they can pick who that is. Aces and 8’s show up in the crowd and Hogan calls them out again. He says their finest is in the ring so Aces and 8’s can send their finest too.

Two smaller guys go to the railing but they’re just opening it for a bigger guy to get in the ring. This is a fight, not a match. The guy is right handed and he slugs Aries down. Aries spears him down and pounds away as the rest of the team gets in. It’s a big brawl on the floor while aries pounds on the guy that was sent into the ring. The running dropkick in the corner takes the big guy down and hee goes for the mask. Someone gets on the apron and puts his mask back on while pulling out a flapjack. He knocks Aries out and the whole team runs off. Apparently the guy that hit Aries wasn’t there at first. Aries is out cold to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. When you have three matches and they all rock like this, what more can you ask for from a free show? That being said, they didn’t do much at all for the PPV. Then again, who freaking cares? TNA has never been about the PPV builds and when you get a show like this, what difference does it make? Next week is going to be huge with the final matches in the Series before the finals three days later. Great show here and one of the best Impacts I can ever remember.

Results

James Storm b. Rob Van Dam – Last Call

ODB b. Madison Rayne – The Bam

Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles – Rollup

Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle – Swanton Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews