Joey Janela’s Spring Break 3 Part 2
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: White Eagle Hall, Jersey City, New Jersey
Commentators: Denver Colorado, Dave Prazak, Kevin Gill

This is a show I’ve been trying to see for a long time now and I might as well knock it, as well as the rest of the Wrestlemania XXXV weekend series, out while I have the chance. If you have seen something from this series before, this show is going to be complete insanity but often in a good way. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Night One if you need a recap.

No opening video here, mainly because the show didn’t start until after 12:30am due to the ROH/New Japan show running WAY late.

Jungle Boy vs. Joey Janela

Janela has Penelope Ford with him and it’s a F*** ROH chant to start things off. Boy starts fast with a running hurricanrana and an armdrag out of the corner. They don’t bother staring it down as Janela hits a chop in the corner, followed by a rather hard superkick. Boy comes back with his own superkick, followed by another exchange of superkicks. That gives us the required Young Bucks/AEW references until Boy turns him inside out with a clothesline.

Boy knocks him to the floor and hits back to back suicide dives into those plastic chairs. Back in and Janela catches him on top for a reverse fisherman’s buster onto the apron. That’s only good for a one back inside so Janela stomps on the ribs. They chop the heck out of each other until Boy spears him through the ropes. The Jungle Cutter (exactly what you think it is) gives Boy two so it’s Ford coming in with a top rope hurricanrana.

Boy isn’t having any of this and gives her a Backstabber out of the corner. Janela is back up with a spinning Trapper Keeper bomb for a very near call so he asks the fans who he is. That means a song that I don’t recognize but Boy runs him over. A Lionsault is countered into a dragon sleeper of all things (that’s not bad) but Boy is in the ropes in a hurry.

The camel clutch is broken up even faster so Boy takes it to the apron for the Death Valley Driver to plant Janela. Boy hits a springboard flip dive to knock out Janela and a bunch of chairs, freaking Ford out even more. Back in and Janela snaps off a Tombstone for two but since no one sells at this show (just how it’s going to work), Boy is already up top but Janela, with the crazy eyes, is up there with him for a top rope brainbuster.

That’s good for one and Boy nips up (Colorado: “WHAT THE F***???”), followed by a superkick for two on Janela. They trade snap German suplexes with both of them popping right back up and then hitting two more each. With that not working, Janela grabs a choke but Boy reverses into something like a raised full nelson to make Janela tap at 13:31.

Rating: C+. One thing to keep in mind on this show is that it isn’t going to be like most regular events. This is all about action and not psychology, so don’t waste your time on a bunch of stuff that isn’t going to be there. Boy looked good here and it isn’t a surprise that he became a thing in AEW. Janela….well it’s his show and you can only be so mean to him so we’ll move on.

They shake hands post match.

I’m assuming they’ve edited out all of the transitional stuff between matches, which is a little annoying given that the show is still full price over a year after it took place but how much could be missing?

LAX vs. Rock N Roll Express

This is the match that made me want to watch the show, just for the pure spectacle. The fans are very glad to see the hometown LAX and then declare the whole thing awesome just after the bell. Gibson and Santana start things off with Gibson claiming a hair pull to take him into the corner. Santana gets taken into the corner as well and that’s good for a standoff.

A hiptoss takes Santana down and Ortiz comes in to get one as well. It’s off to Morton for the right hand to the ribs into the Million Dollar knee lift to send LAX outside. Fans: “NEVER LOST IT!” The Express take over on Santana’s arm and, after drawing Ortiz in, do the fake clap tag, which feels a little wrong coming from them. Ortiz comes in and is armdragged straight into a wristlock but it’s a snap powerslam to put Morton down.

Gibson is told to suck it and that is just wrong on so many levels. A shot to Morton’s arm brings in Gibson for the failed save, allowing LAX to double team in the corner. I can always go for something so simple that still works so well. Ortiz misses a charge in the corner though and it’s a hot tag to Gibson as everything breaks down. The Express is sent into each other but Santana clotheslines Ortiz by mistake.

Ortiz drops a leg on Gibson and adds a top rope splash. Morton dives in for the save and keeps going, landing a Canadian Destroyer on Santana. The threat of the double dropkick sends LAX outside so Morton dives onto both of them. Santana has to dive in for a save and it’s a double superkick to Gibson. A double clothesline drops LAX but Morton gets sent into the corner for an assisted Cannonball and the pin at 8:35.

Rating: C+. This is a match that had no business being any good due to the age situation but the Express came out there and somehow made the thing work. It was a decent enough match and my goodness I can’t believe they almost pulled that off. LAX is a great team and the Express hung in there with them well enough. Good stuff here.

Post match, LAX shows respect, offering hugs and bows. The SPRING BREAK chant breaks out but Ortiz wants a ROCK AND ROLL one instead. They even exchange bandannas in a great moment.

LA Park vs. Masato Tanaka

They chop it out to start with Park knocking him down in the corner and hitting the shaky knees dance. A clothesline drops Tanaka for two and there’s a chair shot to the head. Tanaka no sells it as is his custom and the roaring elbow gives Tanaka two. Park’s snap powerslam gets two, followed by a whip with the belt. Tanaka fights up and knocks him to the floor for the big dive but Park sends Tanaka into the apron.

There’s a chair to the back and a slam onto the empty chairs, meaning it’s time to bring in some doors. Park drives him through one of the doors for two and it’s time to go up. Tanaka is right back up with a superplex, followed by a splash for two. Back up and Park spears him through a table for the sudden pin at 9:40.

Rating: D+. Just a brawl here and something that has been done a lot better elsewhere. Park is someone who is a lot better when he gets to show off his amazing charisma that was only somewhat on display here. Tanaka looks exactly the same as he did back in ECW and I can see why fans would want to see him around some more. Not a terrible match, but nothing that felt like it belonged on a major show.

So we have about an hour and a half left in the show and it’s time for the main event.

The Greatest Cluster****

Oh boy what am I getting myself into. So it’s a Royal Rumble and you are eliminated by pinfall, submission, being thrown over the top (dives DO NOT count), if you leave the arena, or if you die. The Necro Butcher (looking old and very different without a shirt) is in at #1 and, after Butcher eliminates referee Bryce Remsburg, Nick Gage is in at #2. I’m not sure if the bell rings but they lock up and shove each other a bit until Gage is sent to the apron. Shlak and Markus Crane come out together, I guess as #3 combined, who bring in their own door.

Butcher punches Crane down and slugs it out with Shlak, with Gage watching like a fan from the apron. They go to their knees and it’s Georgie Boy, with a rubber chicken, in at #4. Gage and Crane jump him immediately and Gage beats Georgie down with the chicken. The door is set up in the corner and Georgie goes through it, allowing Crane and Shlak to beat him down with the pieces.

Swoggle is in at #5 and superkicks Shlak down. Everyone brawls around the ropes until Arik Cannon is in at #6. Gage is waiting on him for the slugout as Swoggle seems to bite Butcher’s foot. A low blow with the rubber chicken keeps Butcher down as Shlak tosses Georgie out. Cannon is busted so Gage rips at the cut and it’s Joe Gacy in at #7 to go after both of them. Crane can’t hold Gacy up so he goes with a sloppy dragon sleeper instead. Brian Pillman Jr. is in at #8 and brawls with Gage as well, earning himself a sitout powerbomb out of the corner.

Crane and Shlak double belly to back suplex Pillman for two and…..here are Nate Webb and Marko Stunt for a concert from the crowd. They sing/play Teenage Dirtbag as an unnamed man dances around ringside. Pillman dives onto Gacy and some guy in a mask takes Webb out. It’s Maxwell Jacob Friedman, who gets in (at #9, assuming Stunt and Webb don’t count) to go after Pillman as Crane is eliminated.

Swoggle unloads on MJF in the corner as Gage seems to have been eliminated somewhere in there. Joey Ryan is in at #10 (Colorado: “AND VIEWERSHIP HAS SKYROCKETED IN THE LOUISVILLE, KENTUCKY AREA!”) and we pause for the full baby oil. Sweet Tooth Music hits Cannon and MJF hurts himself on a low blow attempt. Sexxxy Eddy is in at #11 and he wants Ryan. That means oil on Eddy’s chest as Cannon stops for a beer. The match just stops while Joey and Eddy rub their chests until Effy is in at #12.

Ryan pulls off Eddy’s towel….and no clothes are found under there. Eddy knocks Ryan into the corner and a dropkick sends him into Ryan (you can imagine how this goes), with Effy kicking Eddy into him over and over. Mick Moretti is in at #13 as Eddy manages a moonsault (while managing to keep his hands in a specific place). Cannon rolls Eddy up for the elimination and it’s Marko Stunt officially in at #14. Logan Stunt, who looks even younger than Marko, is in at #15 (or maybe part of #14 as I’m completely lost on keeping the numbers).

Marko saves Logan from Necro and it’s time for the brothers to argue. Butcher gets rid of Logan but can’t quite put Marko out. Team White Wolf are in at #16 (A-Kid and Carlos Romo, who are announced together) and a double superkick gets rid of Pillman. Kobe Durst is in at #17 and goes after White Wolf. That goes nowhere, so it’s Swoggle grabbing Joey’s it….and throwing him out by it in a big upset.

Egotistico Fantastico is in at #18 and the fans seem pleased to see him. Gacy eliminates himself for some reason (I think?) and Egotistico hits a double jump springboard for two on Durst. As you might be able to guess, the eliminations don’t exactly mean much here. G-Raver is in at #19 and busts out the hypodermic needles (yep) to stab Swoggle in the head. Swoggle rips them out and German suplexes Raver, but Cannon superkicks Swoggle for the elimination.

Kikutaro (in a Cleveland Indians jersey for an improvement) is in at #20 as Moretti is out. After sticking his fingers in various areas on various people, he uses the smell to knock them out, only to have Bryce Remsburg put Kikutaro’s fingers in Kikutaro’s mouth. That knocks him out as well and Kikutaro gets dog piled for the elimination. Teddy Hart, with cat, is in at #21 as G-Raver hits a top rope double knee to Shlak.

Cannon brainbusters Romo for the pin and then backdrops A-Kid out as Hart walks around with the cat. Homicide is in at #22 as the cat is taken to the floor. Everyone (include Gacy, who wasn’t out) stops for the Hart vs. Homicide showdown, with Homicide grabbing a wristlock of all things. That’s broken up so Hart spits in his face and fires off an uppercut. Cryme of all people are in at #23 and dang I miss that theme (historical note: this is being written the week of Shad Gaspard’s death so this is kind of hard to see actually).

They slug it out with Homicide and Hart, the latter of whom is low bridged out. Shad and Homicide fight on the floor (without an elimination) and Cannon gets rid of Shlak. Egotistico powerbombs Durst for an elimination and things settle down a bit. Cannon and Fantastico head outside for a breather, leaving MJF, Gacy, Butcher and G-Raver in the ring (there are a lot more still in, though not inside at the moment).

Grim Reefer is in at #24 and he dives off the stage onto someone. Homicide and Shad gets back in with the former hitting a cutter on Reefer. For some reason Homicide goes up and Reefer shoves him out for the elimination. JTG and Cannon get back in and the Ugly Ducklings (Colby Corino, Lance Lude and Rob Killjoy with Coach Mikey) are in at #25. Colby needs two tried to tornado DDT Reefer and it’s Slim J in at #26.

There goes Reefer and Slim J hits a sloppy tornado DDT of his own on Corino. Slim J beats up all of the Ducklings and then hits a huge dive to the floor onto a bunch of people. Facade is in at #27 and kicks away at the Ducklings as well. Lude is put onto Killjoy’s shoulders and Facade’s rope walk kick to the chest makes Lude reverse hurricanrana his partner for a big crash. MJF gets rid of Shad and then JTG to clear the ring a bit, and of course does JTG’s dance on the ropes for a bonus. Butcher knocks MJF down and it’s Gringo Loco in at #28.

Loco hits a Swanton onto Raver and then flips away from Killjoy in the corner. A Spanish Fly hits Killjoy and it’s AJ Gray in at #29. He clotheslines the Ducklings down to continue a pretty funny running gag. Colby gets powerbombed into Killjoy in the corner and there’s a Steiner Screwdriver to Lude. Gray hits a big corkscrew dive onto a bunch of people but here’s Ophidian in at #30 for a Meteora on Gray, followed by the suicide dive to the floor. Now it’s the Ducklings hitting their own running flip dives, giving us a QUACK QUACK chant. Rich Swann is in at #31 and dropkicks Killjoy, followed by a super hurricanrana for a bonus.

Swann adds his own big corkscrew dive, followed by Facade’s springboard 450 onto the bigger pile. Cannon doesn’t bother with a dive so Butcher knocks him down with a right hand. Dustin Thomas (the wrestler with no legs) is in at #32 for a 619 to Fantastico. The Swanton connects to get rid of Fantastico and the NO LEGS chant (to the OLE tune) is on. Now it’s Dustin hitting his own flip dive onto the pile (GET BACK INSIDE ALREADY!) and it’s Stunt vs. Loco. MJF breaks that up and here are Nate Webb and Brendan Brown (lead singer of the band Wheatus, who sing Teenage Dirtbag) in at #33.

Brown kicks MJF low and hits a Diamond Cutter for the surprise elimination. Facade hits another big springboard spinning dive….and literally misses everyone as Parrow and Odinson (two big monsters) are in at #34. They Super Collide the Ducklings and FINALLY throw out Lude’s unconscious body. Killjoy is thrown out as well, followed by Colby in short order. Loco follows the three of them and it’s Shane Mercer in at #35.

Gray gets beaten up and tossed out, followed by a European uppercut Doomsday Device to Facade. He’s out as well and Parrow stomps on Dustin, followed by the elimination. Swann kicks Parrow in the face to no effect as it’s a Fire Thunder Driver to plant him. Mercer, who is rather muscular himself, can’t do much to Odinson and Parrow until he sends Odinson into the corner. Mercer adds a rather impressive delayed vertical suplex drops Parrow (who is built similar to Braun Strowman), followed by a moonsault fall away slam to Odinson.

That’s enough to get rid of Odinson and Parrow as Tony Deppen is in at #36, but first we need some crowd surfing. That takes so long that it’s Jake Atlas and Lucas Riley in at #37. The two of them go after Mercer with some springboard takedowns but Butcher comes back in with a chair. Australian Suicide is in at #38 as Gacy is slammed onto a chair. Commentary says we’re at forty entrants and….again does it matter all that much? Kyle The Beast is in at #39 so Deppen blows his nose on him.

A big powerbomb gets rid of Deppen and Kyle throws Atlas and Riley around without much effort. Mercer and Kyle have the big power showdown and it’s Caveman Ugg in at #40. Kyle Stuns Suicide out and it’s Crowbar (looking ancient yet tough) in at #40. A super hurricanrana gets two on Gacy and Raver armdrags Kyle a few times. Matt Tremont is in at #41 and goes after Butcher as Gacy swings a chair at various people.

Mercer tosses Atlas and Riley as Crowbar suplexes Gacy onto the chair for another elimination. Grizzly Redwood (the Littlest Lumberjack) is in to go after Mercer as Ugg moonsaults Crowbar for another elimination. Tremont runs Swann over with a clothesline and it’s Chris Dickinson and Pinkie Sanchez in at #42. Dickinson needs some time to powerbomb Redwood before stomping on Butcher in the corner.

Michael Blais is in at #43 and he is immediately followed by Kit Osbourne and Frankie Pickard at #44. The two of them start fighting each other in a hurry and a double suplex puts Butcher down. NWO Sting is in at #45 (and towers over most of the match) for some forearms and it’s Tracy Smothers, with cane, in at #46. Chops and right hands abound until Mantaur is in at #47. With nothing going on, Matt Knicks is in at #48. NWO Sting is out and it’s Cecil Nyx in at #49 to lift Swann up, walk him around ringside, and then suplex him. Dickinson dumps Smothers and it’s Jimmy Lloyd in at #50.

Lloyd beats up Nyx, leaving Raver and Tremont to headbutt each other out. Masashi Takeda is in at #51 and immediately goes after Lloyd. Jeff Cannonball is in at #52 as even commentary can’t remember how many people are involved. Mercer is out and Takeda follows him to the floor. Ethan Page is in at #53 and beats up various people until Essa Rios is in at #54 (Denver: “If we dug up Mantaur, why not Essa Rios?”). Nyx gets faceplanted for an elimination and Butcher is tossed after an hour and sixteen minutes.

It’s time for another door as Maria Manic…..is not here actually. Cue about seven women from the crowd (including Ashley Vox, Shazza McKenzie, Allie Kat, Session Moth Martina, Su Yung, Maria Manic and more) as Rios is out. Tremont and Page are put through doors as the women get in to start beating up the men. Raver stares Martina down so she spits beer in his face and hits him with a DDT. Stunt can’t powerbomb Vox, who reverses into White Noise.

Ophidian gets bulldogged onto a table and it’s time to beat up Frank the Clown (who was standing by the entrance). The women take turns kicking him low and it’s Lloyd’s turn to get destroyed. Here are the light tubes, all of which are broken over various parts of Lloyd. The fans want PCO but settle for Dickinson getting beaten up instead.

Two tables are brought in and Maria superplexes Dickinson through both of them. The referees are beaten up and Yung Mandible Claws one of them in the corner. Referee Aubrey Edwards is allowed to leave and here’s Joey Janela himself to get choked on the ropes to end the show, meaning the main event is a no contest at we’ll say about 1:25:00.

Rating: C+. I have no earthly idea what to call this one so we’ll go with slightly above average, even with the….I guess the word is joke (?) ending. Normally my criticism would be that the match was a mess, but looking at the title, that’s what they were going for here. This was definitely more of a match for the live crowd and I can go with that, as one of the best times I’ve ever had at a show was a similar match at the WrestleCon SuperShow. I think I liked this, even though it didn’t have a ton of star power and featured a lot of interchangeable indy wrestlers. It’s a lot of fun, but the ending could be very, very annoying.

Overall Rating: C-. This was definitely the weaker of the two shows, but it’s certainly not bad. The main event is going to be divisive as it feels like they ran out of time to come up with a good ending, which can happen. What we got was memorable, but the first night was a blast and this was more like a show that existed for the sake of having one (very, very) long song and dance to end the indy half of the weekend. It was a good enough show, but the first night is a lot more fun (albeit with a weaker main event).

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

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Joey Janela’s Spring Break 3 Part 1
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: White Eagle Hall, Jersey City, New Jersey
Commentators: Denver Colorado, Dave Prazak, Kevin Gill

We open with a kid in a living room shouting something that I can’t understand at a camera. This isn’t going to go well is it?

The ring announcer welcomes us to the show.

Joey Janela vs. Marko Stunt

This is Joey’s first match since he destroyed his knee in September and Stunt’s first since November when I believe he broke his leg. Stunt gets a special entrance video where someone calls him, saying Joey wants him on the show. Janela also has Penelope Ford with him and that’s always a good thing. Stunt has a rather awesome entrance to Pat Benetar’s We Belong and you can see how happy he is to be back.

They shake hands and we’re ready to go with the crowd near molten. Joey takes him down and runs the ropes, even as Marko steps to the side and watches him. Marko kicks him in the knee, becoming the closest thing to a heel as you can get around here. Joey hits a running kick of his own and flips Stunt off but it’s his show so it’s more ok. Back up and Marko’s crucifix is reversed into a German suplex and Stunt lays on the back of his head for a bit, looking rather dead.

The fans request and receive even more German suplexes for two, setting up Janela throwing him over the top and into the crowd. Janela thinks the crowd surfing looks fun so he goes out as well for a chop off, all while the fans are holding them up. They head back to the ring with Stunt hitting a running flip dive off the apron. Another suicide dive takes Stunt out again but he’s fine enough to miss a running knee back inside.

Rating: C+. This is a show where the crowd is going to carry the matches WAY further than they deserve on their own merits and that was the case here. This was all about the dives and seeing Stunt take the big bumps and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s reminiscent of ECW in a way: these guys might not be making it to the top level anytime soon, but they’re stars here and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Post match Joey raises Stunt’s hand and Penelope hugs him. She’s rather forgiving.

The ring announcer points out the bars around the arena in information the people there already know.

Here’s Tony Deppen for a chat. I don’t know Deppen but he comes out to We Built This City, which was in the Muppets so I like him already. Deppen yells about being eliminated from the Cluster**** (big battle royal last year) by Mantaur in five seconds. He offers an open challenge to any fan and yells a lot of rather inappropriate things. He goes into the crowd and gets in an argument with a fan….who he kicks in the head. Deppen pulls him into the ring and the bell rings.

Tony Deppen vs. Fan

Deppen takes him into the ring and mocks him a bit before trying a suplex, which is reversed into a sleeper. The fans get behind the Fan, even as he gets driven into the corner a few times for the break. An armdrag sends Deppen down again and the Fan manages a 619. A springboard crossbody gets two and the stunned Deppen is sent outside, with the Fan hitting a flip dive off the top. This is quite the talented Fan.

Back in and the Fan takes a little too much time as Deppen gets in a superplex for two. He didn’t hook a leg so it’s really his fault. The Fan manages a right hand and a tornado DDT into a slingshot 450 for a crazy close two. A splash off the top misses though and Deppen hits a running kick to the head for the pin at 5:25.

Rating: A+. That’s one of the most impressive things I’ve ever seen. I know the fans are extra hot for this show but they didn’t need to carry something like this one very far. The Fan (he needs a name and after looking as good as he did out there he’ll have one soon) was awesome for someone pulled out of a chair. This is definitely worth seeing if you get the chance.

Oh and something I forgot to mention: the Fan doesn’t have legs. Read it back with that in mind.

The Fan gets a mega ovation, as I’d certainly think he’s earned.

Jungle Boy vs. A-Kid vs. Australian Suicide vs. Jake Atlas vs. Shane Mercer vs. Slim J

I know most of these guys. Jungle Boy is an AEW guy. Mercer, the biggest guy in the match, gets quintuple superkicked three times to start but he’s still on his feet on the floor. After a series of dives, Atlas walks on his hands to headscissor A-Kid and a running superkick doesn’t slow him down that much. Suicide comes back in as we seem to be firmly in the “you do something and then I’ll do something” formula.

A headscissors puts Atlas on the floor and it’s Slim J coming back in as we get Bill Behrens references. As you can guess, it’s Suicide being sent outside and Jungle Boy comes in for a middle rope legdrop. Mercer gets in and hits a one armed press slam (of course), managing to knock the other people down while still holding Jungle Boy above his head. More superkicks put him down again and it’s Atlas and Kid hitting moonsault to the floor.

The two of them get back inside and double team Suicide, who comes off the top with a corkscrew press. Slim J’s high crossbody gets two on Suicide with Jungle Boy making the save. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker onto Mercer’s knee puts J down but Jungle Boy hits an enziguri to drop Mercer as well. Jungle Boy takes Atlas up top but it’s something like a super swinging Angle Slam for no cover.

A-Kid suplexes Atlas and gets two off a standing moonsault but Mercer is back in with one of the biggest overhead belly to belly suplexes I’ve ever seen. Just because we haven’t seen enough crazy stuff yet, Mercer puts Slim J in a fireman’s carry and WALKS THE TOP ROPE WITH HIM (ok so he was holding Atlas’ hand) for a super AA. Suicide makes a very late save with a shooting star and the fans are very pleased again.

Kid is the first one up with a 619 to Atlas but a high crossbody to Mercer is countered into a super moonsault World’s Strongest Slam. Atlas knees Suicide in the face and hits a top rope cartwheel DDT (seriously) to take him down. Kid goes after Jungle Boy and gets on his back, but Jungle Boy moves to the side and hooks a full nelson with Kid still on his back (think a Backpack Stunner but with them twisted around) for the tap at 10:05.

Rating: B+. Oh yeah I’m seeing why this show gets these kind of reviews. This was one of the craziest spotfests I’ve ever seen and I couldn’t believe some of the things I was seeing. It also helps that most of these guys aren’t very well known so they were able to surprise me with a lot of the spots. It was a blast and the kind of match that makes indy wrestling so much fun over this weekend.

GCW World Title: Nick Gage vs. Shinjiro Otani

Gage is defending and that means it’s time for the fans to treat him like some kind of greatest thing ever. The announcers ensure us that this will NOT just be a freak show and I can’t say I’m convinced. They make it clear that Gage is multi talented as Otani takes him down without much effort. A rope break gets Gage out of a wristlock with the fans sound like they want to kill Otani for hurting their hero. That’s enough wrestling for Gage (less than three minutes) so let’s get a table.

Otani will have none of that and chops Gage down into a half crab. Another rope break saves Gage and the fans again insist that he break it up. An atomic drop and running elbow into the corner have Otani in trouble and Gage hits a Broski Boot. That’s an Otani signature so he suplexes Gage through a table to even things up. Otani shows him how to do the Facewash and some Broski Boots with the kicks knocking Gage’s second down each time. Back up and Gage gets two off a DDT but Otani is right back with a kick to the head and a legsweep for two of his own. Gage grabs a rollup to steal the pin out of nowhere at 9:45.

Rating: D. This was Otani doing a lot of his signature stuff while Gage showed that he can’t do much outside of death match wrestling. I’m not a fan of the guy or his style and while I get that he’s an Otani fan (fair enough), this completely stopped the flow of a very entertaining show so far. The fans there dig him and good for them, but Gage is not my thing.

Post match Gage continues to swear a lot and talks about being a huge Otani fan growing up.

Invisible Man vs. Invisible Stan

It’s EXACTLY what it’s billed as and yes there is a backstory as they’re brothers. Stan is a mega heel and Man is a huge face. Bryce Remsburg (like ANYONE else could be the referee) checks Stan for weapons as the graphics call both guys Invisible Man. Actually hang on a second as Bryce throws on his Janela glasses, apparently allowing him to see both guys. Then how did he check Stan?

There’s a door in the corner as Bryce gets a clean break and it’s a pinfall exchange sequence into a standoff as the fans aren’t sure what to chant. They slug it out with the fans going right along with the BOO/YAY chants and Remsburg being more into it than anything else. A rake to the eyes has Man in trouble and they both demand chairs.

Both guys sit in the middle and slug it out from the chairs (I can’t believe this is somehow working) but hang on because Remsburg has to put on the gloves to check on Man’s cut. He goes to throw up the X but Man shoves him over….and they go to the floor. The camera loses them (How?) and they get all the way onto the balcony for the New Jack dive, with the referees below (in the crowd for some reason) going down in a heap.

They get back in with Stan only getting two and getting in a fight with Remsburg. That means a shot to Remsburg’s head, drawing in Kikutaro to take his place (and glasses of course). Kikutaro pelts a chair at Stan and gives him a DDT with Man getting a VERY delayed two. Remsburg orders Kikutaro out and it’s….I’m not sure how to describe it to give Stan two (these indy moves are so weird sometimes). A spear through the door (well done on the break) finishes Stan at 7:18.

Rating: C. The action was good enough but that dive out of the balcony felt so tacked on. You shouldn’t need a ref bump and a huge spot like that in a seven minute match. The brawling and slugouts were good as you have to sell the hatred between the two, but at least do something a little more logical.

The fans throw money into the ring, which is well deserved.

…Orange Cassidy vs. Taka Michinoku

It isn’t clear if Cassidy’s Independent Wrestling Title is on the line or not. Taka wants a lockup but that’s harder that it seems as Cassidy doesn’t take his hands out of his pockets. He gets a hand out of each and Cassidy puts them right back in. Both hands are pulled out at the same time but Cassidy puts them right back in at the same time. With nothing else working, Taka puts his hands down his trunks before the shoulder exchange lets Cassidy hit one in slow motion.

Cassidy’s dancing escape gets him out of a waistlock and it’s a dropkick into a nip up, all with the hands still in the pockets. The very light kicks to Taka’s legs make him remove Cassidy’s glasses and the fans know this isn’t going to end well. Now the hands come out of the pockets and Cassidy lightly…..I don’t think I can call those chops. The low superkick to the leg has Cassidy celebrating but Taka pokes him in the eye to take over.

Rating: C-. I think I caused myself to lose some interest in this match as I’ve seen Cassidy a few times now and it’s a lot of the same stuff he’s done in each of his matches this weekend. He’s talented and funny, but it’s not the kind of gimmick that you need to be seeing every single week.

Post match Taka takes the glasses and respect is shared.

Here’s Ethan Page to rant about how Janela doesn’t own him and wants to call the show Ethan Page’s Body Guy Extravaganza. As for tonight though, he has a mystery opponent.

Starman vs. Ethan Page

Starman is a masked guy in a pink bodysuit who sneaks in through the crowd and rolls Page up for the pin at 3 seconds. Apparently that was for Page’s soul?

The mask comes off and it’s….freaking VIRGIL??? Page snaps and says that since he now has to agent the Cluster**** tomorrow, we’ll make it the greatest Cluster**** of all time.

The ring announcer thanks the fans and we pause a bit to set up for the deathmatch main event. Since he can’t do it though, here’s Low Life Louie (from ECW) to announce instead. I mean, he doesn’t actually do the announcing yet though as we get a new mat and a bunch of weapons added in first. This eats up several minutes as the announcers chatter about various deathmatch legends.

Masashi Takeda vs. Jimmy Lloyd

Spider Nate Webb is on commentary and there are light tubes all around the ring. Token wrestling sequence to start, which is rather token with A BUNCH OF LIGHT TUBES on the apron. Lloyd misses an enziguri and they trade exchanges of dropping themselves on tubes. Tubes are broken over each other’s heads, followed by gusset plates (pieces of galvanized metal) to the head. Lloyd is busted and another one plate is used to cut open his arm.

Takeda breaks a tube over the arm for two and another goes across the mouth for a Russian legsweep. Lloyd is gushing and breaks more tubs over Takeda’s head. Tubes are dropped onto Takeda for two and another is superkicked into Takeda’s face for two. Takeda dropkicks some tubes into Lloyd’s face….and it’s time for a board covered in open scissors.

The scissors are put onto Lloyd and a running knee drives them in, with Lloyd having to pull a pair out of his chest. Takeda suplexes him for two but gets Razor’s Edged into a board with something unspecified covering it in the corner. Lloyd gets two off a tiger driver before they both no sell suplexes.

A clothesline gives Lloyd two and someone brings him a weed wacker, which Takeda takes away and uses on the arm. Now it’s a door covered with forks which is then covered with tubes. Lloyd gets German suplexed through them, setting up a knee to drive tubes into the chest for one. More tubes are put on Lloyd’s chest and a Swanton gets two. A reverse inverted DDT onto more tubes finishes Lloyd at 9:23.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling.

Post match Lloyd asks Takeda to break one more tube over his head so Takeda does it to himself to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. While there are some parts that just are not for me, I’ll give this show a ton of credit for one of the most entertaining and energized shows I’ve ever seen. The crowd was on fire all night and I was getting into a lot of these things, mainly due to how much effort they putting into nearly everything. Normally that’s the case with a bunch of matches that aren’t all that great, but a lot of these were very good with some of the better action I’ve seen all night.

At the same time though, there are still a few things going on that I wasn’t wild on. The deathmatch stuff just isn’t my style and that’s never going to change. Other than that there were some matches that weren’t quite as good as the best on the card, but (wrestling wise at least) nothing is all that bad and it’s a show I’ll almost certainly be watching next year. Well done here and I was very nicely surprised.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

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