WWE Vault Grab Bag VII
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bill Mercer, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

It’s that time again as I have a bunch of matches ready to go from the WWE Vault (and maybe a few from some other WWE associated channels) and we’ll be looking at some random ones. I have no idea what’s going to be on here and that has made for some fun versions of this before. Let’s get to it.

From July 11, 2011, in Boston, Massachusetts, a dark match after Raw (and six days before Money In The Bank).

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Non-title, I think. Cena starts fast by sending him into the buckle a few times and they’re quickly on the floor. Punk is sent over and into the announcers’ table, with Cena pausing for a drink to spit in Punk’s face (our hero). Back in and Punk gets in a shot of his own, allowing him to wipe some of the water out of his face. Cena is sent into the steps (as tended to be the case in a lot of his matches), allowing Punk to grab the mic (uh oh).

He wants to congratulate Derek Jeter (who had just gotten his 3,000th hit) and hits Cena in the head with the mic and then congratulates himself for the cover. Granted it only gets two so Punk grabs a figure four necklock. That doesn’t last long so Punk gets two more off of a DDT. With that not working, Punk loads up the announcers’ table but Cena cuts him off and…misses a flying shoulder to send him right back to the floor.

A chair is brought in as I guess this is a street fight (makes sense) and Cena is beaten down again. The leg lariat cuts off a comeback attempt and we’re in the chinlock. Punk seems to load up the People’s Elbow but stops to yell at a fan (who might be John Cena’s father), even grabbing him over the barricade. Said fan (and said Cena’s father) punches Punk, allowing Cena to whip him into the chair in the corner. The AA gives Cena the pin at 9:24.

Rating: B-. It was clearly the kind of match where they weren’t exactly in high gear out there and that’s the point of a dark match. Having Cena Sr. get involved made it feel a bit more special and Punk’s Jeter deal in the middle was funny. They would have the big showdown in six days, but it was nice to see them do this king of match, as they’ve probably done it a hundred times.

From Minneapolis, Minnesota, August 26, 1984. I’ve been dreading and waiting for this one. There’s no way to put this as it’s the time Mean Gene Okerlund teamed up with Hulk Hogan.

Now since this is the best wrestling channel ever, OF COURSE they include the fairly famous training videos, with Hogan going to see Gene at five in the morning (ignore the clock saying it’s about 8:55) and finding him smoking a cigar. Hogan freaks out over Gene wanting to have pancakes, bacon and eggs and coffee so Hogan is going to make him breakfast. This means a bunch of raw eggs, which has Gene thinking twice (that image was in his Titantron video at Wrestlemania X7).

Hogan is willing to let it go for now because they need to run a few miles before the sun comes up. They go running (in the middle of the day) and Gene actually keeps up with him for the most part). Then Hogan tells him they need to do it again, this time with the Eye Of The Hulkster. The run continues (now with Gene in different clothes) through the streets but Gene stops for a beer and a bratwurst.

Hogan cuts that off and it’s time for Day 2, as they hit the gym (Hogan’s Mean Gene O Mania shirt is great.). It’s off to Day 3, with Hogan showing up at 6am and I guess they break into an empty arena to run the steps. Hogan even does one of them with Gene on his shoulders and then makes Gene do it with Hogan on his back (what an imagine). Day 4 sees Hogan using Gene as a wheelbarrow up a flight of stairs and Gene thinks he’s ready. That’s not enough so we go full training montage, set to Real American. Dang this was great and…oh yeah we have a match (the opponents haven’t been mentioned to this point.

Hulk Hogan/Gene Okerlund vs. George Steele/Mr. Fuji

As I try to get my head around Gene in trunks (and Hogan in blue, unfortunately not matching Gene in black), Hogan and Fuji start things off with Hogan sending him flying. Steele comes in for a pose off with Hogan and we’re clipped (“FULL MATCH” my spleen) to Steel hitting Hogan in the throat to take over. Hogan Hulks Up and slugs away, with Steele bailing out to the floor.

Gene even goes to the apron to stomp on Fuji’s fingers but stops to high five Hogan, which means a tag. Gene actually gets in to face Steele and immediately crawls through the legs and brings Hogan back in to fire away. We’re clipped again to Hogan beating on Fuji but having to cut off an interfering Steele. Gene pulls the salt away from Fuji and actually kicks him down, allowing Hogan to drop Gene onto Fuji for the pin at 3:30 shown (the whole thing runs about 10:20 so they clipped the heck out of it).

Rating: B. Ok I don’t think I’m spoiling much here when I say the match isn’t the point. This was ALL about the gloriously 80s training videos, with Gene going from a cigar smoking pancake eater to the peak of his physical prowess in about four days through the power of Hulkamania. It’s a great example of “so bad that it’s great” and I had a blast with the whole thing. If you’re a fan of 80s wrestling and haven’t seen…well if you’re a fan you better have seen it.

Post match Gene and Hogan clear the ring and pose, which is as amazing as you could imagine.

From Rochester, New York, June 5, 1990, a dark match at a Wrestling Challenge taping.

Rockers vs. Demolition

Demolition’s Tag Team Titles don’t seem to be on the line here and this is Smash/Crush as Ax (here too) is still recovering from his health issues. Michaels tries the speed on Crush to start but can’t get an O’Connor roll. Instead Crush pulls him out of the air, only for Jannetty to come in with a dropkick to the back to knock them down. Smash comes in and gets his arm worked over by both of them before Jannetty flips over him.

Michaels is back in with a high crossbody for two, though the kickout sends him outside for a cheap shot from Ax. That means it’s time to start in on Michaels’ back, with Crush getting in the required bearhug. A backdrop (eventually) gets Michaels over and the it’s back to the bearhug. We actually get a third bearhug before Michaels is driven into the corner.

Crush charges into a boot and Michaels gets in a harder than expected clothesline. Jannetty is in for the fired up comeback but Smash cuts him off. The Demolition Decapitator is broken up so Crush tries it again, this time with a bit more success. Michaels dives off the top for the save and the double fist drop connects. Smash makes his own diving save but Ax gets in a cheap shot to Michaels to give Smash the pin at 9:06.

Rating: B. This took some time but they were rolling by the end, with the Rockers being able to keep the pace going and Demolition, even this version, being good enough with the power. The big saves at the end were rather good and these guys had chemistry together. It’s a shame we didn’t get more of them, as it could have gone well on a big stage.

Post match Michaels staggers around like he’s drunk. Well, it’s a possibility. We also get a replay of the interference, making me think this was going to be released somewhere but wasn’t for whatever reason.

From August 4, 1986 in Fort Worth, Texas in the WCWA (WCCW).

Bruiser Brody vs. Abdullah The Butcher

Gary Hart is here with Butcher, who gets checked for weapons before the match. Shockingly enough Butcher jumps him on the way in and Brody is right there for the opening brawl (as opposed to the main brawl and likely post match brawl). Butcher’s kicks to the gut are shrugged off and Brody kicks him down to quite the reaction. Brody stomps him on the apron and grabs the mic but Butcher is back with the spike to the face.

Hart is offended that the referee thinks Butcher had a foreign object and Butcher slowly hammers away. Brody knocks him down but they’re both banged up and bloody so they need a breather. That doesn’t last long as Brody gets a chair to blast him in the head and of course they go out into the crowd. They fight behind a big door with Hart trying to hold it closed, only for Brody to come out with a piece of wood to knock Butcher back towards ringside. The referee throws it out at 7:33.

Rating: C. This is the definition of “you know what you’re going to get” and that’s exactly what happened. You have this match for the sake of pure insanity with everyone going everywhere and all the blood and such. It was another run of the mill match between them, though Hart trying to hold the door closed was worth a look.

Post match Brody stays on him until Hart hits Brody with a chair. That lets Butcher get the board and hammer Brody in the head. Some wrestlers come out and get beaten up as Brody is carried out. Hart still insists that Brody was the only one cheating.

From Monday Night Raw, June 28, 1999, the highest rated match in Raw history.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. The Undertaker

Austin is challenging, having made the match before he was cheated out of being CEO the previous night at King Of The Ring. Austin starts fast by taking him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. That’s broken up and Undertaker pounds away, only for Austin to come back with the Thesz press. The middle finger elbow gives Austin two but the threat of a Stunner sends Undertaker outside.

Back in and Paul Bearer offers a distraction so Undertaker can get in a big boot. Lawler says Austin doesn’t have a heart anymore, “like the Scarecrow in the Wizard Of Oz.”. They go outside again, where Austin’s piledriver attempt is countered with a backdrop. Back in and Undertaker clotheslines him into a chinlock as the fans are still right behind Austin.

Old School sets up another chinlock but Austin fights up again…and is knocked into a third chinlock. Back up and it’s a double clothesline for a double down but Undertaker sits up. The Stunner connects out of nowhere but Bearer pulls the referee out. Back in and another Stunner gives Austin the title back at 12:03.

Rating: C. This was oddly similar to the Mankind title win earlier in the year, as you could kind of tell that the title was going to change hands but the match wasn’t exactly great. It’s little more than a dull house show level match with the chinlocks killing the momentum, but you knew what was coming and that kept things interesting. Fans love it when big things like this happen, hence the giant 9.5 rating, even if the match wasn’t much to see.

Post match Undertaker jumps Austin again and busts him open.

From WCW Saturday Night, April 8, 1995.

Sting vs. Steve Austin

Austin has Colonel Robert Parker with him. Sting works on the arm to start but Austin is back up with a headlock. That’s reversed into a backdrop and Sting gets his own headlock. Austin gets up and backs him into the corner, with Schiavone wondering if we’ll get a clean break or not. Schiavone: “Not.” Sting shrugs it off and catapults Austin into the corner, with a rollup getting two. The splash hits raised knees though and Austin hammers on the ribs, including a hard whip into the corner.

The Boston crab stays on Sting’s ribs but Austin gets caught holding the rope. Sting is back up with the clotheslines and the running faceplant, setting up the right hands in the corner. A posting sets up a heck of a top rope splash but Sting misses in a huge crash. They fight over a Tombstone with Sting finally planting him but Austin rolls outside. Back in and Sting grabs a cradle for the pin at 12:58.

Rating: B. It’s kind of amazing how much better Austin got in such a short time. He only had about a month to go in WCW before moving on to ECW and discovering the personality that would make him a star. At this point, he’s a clearly talented but kind of generic heel, with Parker not exactly helping him. Sting was his usual self and the fans were into it, but this was a still developing Austin.

From May 30, 1986 in the UWF in Houston, Texas.

UWF Title: Terry Gordy vs. Jim Duggan

This is the finals of a tournament to crown a new champion but hang on as the One Man Gang is here. Gang says he heard there was going to be a tournament here and he never got an invitation, which is ridiculous because he can beat anyone. He issues the challenge right here right now, with Duggan telling him to make his move. The brawl is on and they head outside, where Gang gets posted. Duggan can get in a chair shot and they head back inside, with Gang hammering away as Gordy and Michael Hayes just look on.

Duggan’s right hands are shrugged off and Gang stomps him out to the floor. That doesn’t last long either as Duggan gives him a running forearm as Gang is already busted open. Some hard chair shots have Gang down and Duggan throws the referee into the cameraman. Gang misses the splash back inside and Duggan spears him out to the floor. The bloody Duggan can’t follow up though and Gang throws a chair inside.

We go to host Jim Ross, who welcomes us to the show and runs down the card. Ross throws it to Duggan (in a towel for some reason), who talks about the beating from Gang, who apparently left after Duggan went down from blood loss. Duggan was given five minutes to get ready and got up, but Steve Williams was there to tell him not to do it. That wasn’t going to happen either because he wanted the gray matter stuffed back in his head so he could fight.

Gordy pulled him back inside to start the fight and we see the last few minutes, with Duggan slugging away to put Gordy down. The spear connected but Duggan was too banged up, allowing Gordy to avoid another spear and send him outside. Hayes posted Duggan again and…well that’s it. Gordy would go on to win the match, which isn’t shown here. Not enough shown to rate but the brawl before the match was way better, as Duggan can do the brawling as well as anyone at this point.

From October 9, 2003 in Turku, Finland.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and this was a Hidden Gem on the WWE Network. This is billed as presented in the most complete form possible, which usually means a music edit. Lesnar goes outside before the bell and yells at fans and we’re clipped to the match in progress and Lesnar bailing to the floor. It works so well that Lesnar does it again as the fans aren’t thrilled.

Lesnar grabs and throws down a chair before getting back inside and powering Undertaker into the corner. They finally lock up and go nowhere as this is absolutely a “we’re not really trying here” house show match to start. A big shove sends Lesnar outside and yep we’re stalling some more. Back in and Undertaker drops him with a shoulder into a hiptoss so….let’s go outside AGAIN.

This time Lesnar rips up a sign and goes back inside to lock up again. Lesnar takes him into the corner again and kicks away, only to get caught with some arm cranking. Old School connects to get the fans back on their side and Undertaker grabs la majistral of all things for two. We’re clipped again to Undertaker missing a charge and crashing out to the floor as I wonder if it was clipped due to fans chanting, as there are some loud ones.

A whip to the steps has Undertaker in more trouble and Lesnar cranks on the leg in a variety of fashions back inside. The leg is wrapped around the rope but Undertaker knocks him into another corner. That’s cut off with a big spinebuster to give Lesnar two and it’s back to the leg cranking. Undertaker fights back but gets caught in an F5 out of nowhere for a near fall.

Back up and Undertaker knocks him down, setting up a limping big boot for two. The referee gets bumped and Undertaker hits the chokeslam for a not very delayed near fall. Lesnar misses a clothesline and takes the referee down again so the Last Ride gets no count. Well Undertaker counts but that doesn’t count. I think. Lesnar gets in some chair shots and the referee gets up to count the pin at 14:47 shown. I can’t imagine they clipped much out of this one.

Rating: C. I’ve seen this one before and it’s quite a house show match. You can tell they weren’t exactly going at top gear here but it’s part of a European house show tour so they’re not going to have the most energy. It doesn’t help that Biker Taker and Lesnar didn’t have the best chemistry either. The match was perfectly ok for the spot they were in, but it’s not exactly great.

Post match Undertaker beats him down with the chair to get some heat back. Cue Rhyno to go after Undertaker but Eddie Guerrero runs in (on his birthday) to make the save.

From Terry Funk’s WrestleFest.

Rob Van Dam vs. Dory Funk Jr.

Bill Alfonso is here with Van Dam and Funk would be about 55 here. Before the match Alfonso insults Funk’s family, including his grandson by saying….yeah I have no idea, as was often the case with Alfonso. Van Dam poses a lot to start and Alfonso goes nuts with the whistle until Funk grabs a headlock. A running forearm puts Van Dam on the floor and we get more whistling.

Back in and Van Dam sweeps the leg for a corkscrew legdrop so Funk fires off the uppercuts. Funk mocks Van Dam’s pose and they go outside, with Funk being rammed into the apron. Van Dam’s big running flip dive barely graces Funk and they’re both down. Back in and Van Dam hammers away as Alfonso goes nuts with the freaking whistle. A springboard legdrop gives Van Dam two but Funk is right back with the uppercuts.

Eventually a butterfly suplex sets up the spinning toehold but Van Dam makes the rope. That means a Van Daminator can hit Funk and we pause for a bit before Van Dam can fire off more right hands. One heck of a Five Star gets….nothing as Van Dam just punches him again. Funk is back up with backdrop but gets small packaged for a rather near fall. Funk sits him on top for a nasty belly to back suplex, which is enough to shoot the half and cradle Van Dam for the pin at 11:35.

Rating: C+. This is a perfect example of a “well, that’s a match that actually happened”. The show was in honor of Terry Funk so of course Dory was there, and even in his mid-50s he could still more than handle himself in the ring. Van Dam wasn’t a big star yet but you could see the potential, and if Dory was willing to work with him, there must have been something there.

From February 23, 1990 in Detroit, Michigan, a dark match before The Main Event.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Mr. Perfect

The Genius is here with Perfect, Sapphire is here with Rhodes, and this is their only recorded singles match. They circle each other to start, with Rhodes mocking Perfect with some prancing. A pair of shoulders put Perfect on the floor and Rhodes brings him back in to pound away in the corner, reminiscent of a monkey with some funk. Back in again and they jaw at each other until Perfect sweeps the leg for the Robinsdale Crunch.

Perfect works on the leg in the corner and in the middle until Rhodes gets a small package so bad that it doesn’t even get one. The Figure Four keeps the leg in trouble but Rhodes finally turns it over and gets his far worse version. That’s broken up as well and Perfect is sent into the ropes, where his head gets tied up ala Cactus Jack. Perfect gets loose so Rhodes knocks him down for the elbow, only for Genius to offer a distraction. Sapphire goes after him so Perfect goes after her, allowing Rhodes to grab a rollup for the pin at 9:28.

Rating: C-. I can’t imagine you were expecting a good match here but that was not the point of Rhodes in the WWF. As usual, the charisma and energy were off the charts and Rhodes could get the fans behind him no matter what he was doing. If nothing else, it’s always weird to see Perfect lose, especially as this was just about a month and a half before his first official loss at Wrestlemania VI.

Post match, dancing ensues.

From (I believe) August 19, 1991 in Rochester, New York.

Undertaker vs. Ultimate Warrior

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker and this is one of the first casket matches. Undertaker tries to jump him before the bell and gets sent face first into the casket instead. The casket is already dented (must be cheap materials) and they get inside, where Undertaker chokes away. Warrior shrugs that off and knocks him down, only to get caught with a kneeling uppercut.

A rather safe Tombstone lets Undertaker….come close to putting Warrior in the casket but he stops to choke instead. Undertaker FINALLY puts him in the casket but Warrior gets up, grabs the Urn, and knocks Undertaker silly (Bearer’s ridiculous reaction is the highlight of the match) to win at 5:50.

Rating: D+. There was nothing to this other than for a way to have Undertaker lose without getting pinned. Warrior was about a week away from vanishing from the company for good, resulting in Randy Savage having to be brought back out of retirement to take his place. I’d call that an upgrade, as Savage fighting Undertaker could have been awesome. Either way, not a good match to wrap things up with here.

Post match Warrior runs away as Undertaker gets out of the casket.

Overall Rating: C. Yeah this wasn’t one of the better overall selections, with very little worth seeing. The Mean Gene training videos were great old school fun, but that’s really about it. There’s nothing overly terrible (the casket match came close) but it’s really just a bunch of random stuff, which is the point of something like this. You don’t know what you might be seeing on any given day on the WWE Vault and it’s fascinating to see what they throw out there. These things are some of the most fun I get to have either way, as I love the randomness of the stuff they release, as it could be just about anything.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Before They Were Superstars
Commentator: Lenny Leonard, Chris Leary, Jonathan Coachman

So this is a collection of matches featuring stars when they were very young, occasionally before they even made their big time (as in WWE) debuts. While they’re little more than a bunch of historical curiosities, they can still be a lot of fun, especially to see the future before anyone could have guessed what was coming. Let’s get to it.

From December 7, 2010 in Dayton, Ohio, a dark match before NXT/Smackdown.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

This is Dashing Cody Rhodes and Rollins is billed from Dayton for a hometown reaction. Rhodes has to insist that he does NOT suck before shouldering Rollins down. Back up and Rollins hits a dropkick but gets knocked out of the corner for his efforts. Rhodes stomps him down and grabs the chinlock, followed by a nice dropkick for two. Rollins is back up with a rollup into a belly to back suplex. A backdrop sends Rollins to the apron and he misses a springboard, allowing Rhodes to grab a rollup pin at 3:45.

Rating: C+. All things considered, this was a fairly entertaining match. You could definitely see the fire in Rollins, especially back in the day when he had fresh legs and wasn’t several major injuries into his career. I still think there was a lot more to be had out of Dashing Cody Rhodes, especially with the transformation into the Dr. Doom years, but it’s a case of never knowing just how good people will become years later.

From UPW Showdown, August 23, 2000.

Prototype vs. Crash Holly

Prototype is a more massive than usual John Cena and he bails out to the floor early on. Back in and Prototype sort of stalks him, only to charge into a headlock takeover. That goes on for a bit and Prototype gets up, only to get taken over again. Back up and Prototype hammers away before whipping Holly chest first into the buckle.

An elbow drop gets two and a side slam, with posing (of course) drops Holly again for the same. A double clothesline leaves them both down and Holly is back up with a missile dropkick for two, with Prototype getting a boot on the rope. It worked so well that Holly goes up again, but this time Prototype spins him down into a slam for the pin at 7:15.

Rating: C. I’m surprised the match went as well as it did, as Cena had only been wrestling for about ten months at this point. You could tell they were keeping it VERY basic here, with Cena getting to play to his strengths of simple but still somewhat impressive looking power moves. As usual, Holly is someone who could be a rather nice mechanic in the ring and that’s why he was in the ring here. It wasn’t a good match, but they were doing what they could.

From Evolve 90.

Progress Atlas Title: Walter vs. Fred Yehi

Yehi (“he is angry, pissed off, and short”) is challenging and this is way before Walter slimmed down into his Gunther form. Walter works on the arm to take Yehi down and then powers him out to the apron without much trouble. Back in and the rather big shoulder has Yehi in more trouble so he goes after the leg for limited success. Yehi slips out of a suplex and stomps on Walter’s foot, meaning the chops stagger Walter a bit more.

Some chops just wake Walter up though and he boots Yehi out to the floor. Once again Yehi gets smart by stomping the hand onto the steps to weaken the chops. Walter is fine enough to knock him back down and drop a splash for two. Yehi strikes back and is immediately suplexes a few times for some near falls. A jumping double stomp to Walter’s back sets up a German suplex to give Yehi two and they’re both down.

Back up and they chop it out, with Yehi blocking it but getting his leg kicked out. Walter pulls him into the sleeper and leans on him, only to back into the corner for the save. The sleeper goes on but Yehi gets him into the corner for some cool looking upkicks. A fisherman’s superplex gets a rather near fall and Yehi slaps on his Koji Clutch. That’s reversed into a cradle for two, followed by another powerbomb to plant Yehi. A Helluva Kick and the big clothesline get two (I bit on that one) so Walter chokes him out for the win at 15:09.

Rating: B. I’ve seen a few bits of Yehi and this was another good outing from him, especially against a monster like Walter. As usual, the chops were the big draw here as Walter beat the fire out of Yehi and overwhelmed him in the end. It’s something that has worked well for him, though Walter has always had issues against smaller wrestlers. This kept me interested, with both looking good in the process.

From Jakked, January 26, 2002.

The Hurricane vs. AJ Styles

Hurricane has Mighty Molly with him and Styles is pretty unknown here, as his only real exposure was a handful of matches in WCW about nine months earlier. Coachman immediately puts Styles over as a big deal, only for Hurricane to take him down three times in a row. Commentary talks about the NWO, with Leary not really knowing who they are, which is probably why he’s not that well known.

Styles is back with a brainbuster into a chinlock, which just earns him a chokeslam attempt. That’s broken up too so Hurricane settles for a backdrop. The Overcastle connects but Styles breaks up the Eye Of The Hurricane as he’s doing a nice job of surviving here. A shooting star press misses as Hurricane rolls away (granted it wasn’t connecting anyway) and actually busts out the Vertebreaker for the pin at 4:34.

Rating: B-. Hurricane is someone who is best known for his comedy stuff but he can still have a serious match when necessary. This was one such occasion and you could tell he wanted to give Styles a lot. If nothing else, having to finish with the Vertebreaker made things that much better and this was a nice way to wrap up the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah some of it was a bit low level, but that’s kind of the point. This was a good example of something that lived up to its name, as this was basically just a bunch of matches from wrestlers who would go on to become big stars but weren’t quite there yet. It’s an idea that could go on for several hours or volumes if they were given the chance and that’s what makes this channel fun. The Walter and Styles matches were both good and it was cool to see Rollins vs. Rhodes before it meant anything. Nice, entertaining Vaulting here.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Every John Cena vs. Randy Orton Title Match
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, John Bradshaw Layfield, Wade Barrett

Oh well why not. I have no idea who thought this needed to be a big five plus hour compilation but I’m kind of surprised that it was that short given how many times they fought over the years. They’ve done this time after time because they’re one of the biggest rivalries WWE has had over the years. I’m probably going to regret this but let’s get to it.

From Summerslam 2007.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is defending and they go with some grappling to start, only for Cena to grab a headlock takeover. Orton takes over with one of his own, with Cena reversing into a failed STF attempt. Back up and Orton slowly pounds away as the fans are rather behind him to start. Cena shrugs off some right hands and gets two off a bulldog as the pace picks up a bit.

The flying shoulder completely misses though and Orton gets to smile a lot. Back in and Orton grabs the rare standing chinlock, followed by the more standard grounded version. Cena powers out, leaving the fans rather annoyed at the developments. A missed charge in the corner puts Cena down again though and Orton starts in on the ankle of all things. The big stomp to the head misses but Orton is right back with another chinlock (he has a reputation for a reason).

Cena is out faster this time but walks into a dropkick, allowing Orton to grab a chin…headlock for a change. Now it’s off to a sleeper as Orton is indeed managing to mix up the boring holds. Cena powers out again and initiates the finishing sequence, only for Orton to break up the FU. The backbreaker cuts Cena off again and Lawler goes off about how Orton shows no emotion, which doesn’t seem to be a positive.

Back up and Cena misses a charge to the floor, allowing Orton to send him hard into the steps. Cena gets back in for a Blockbuster of all things, meaning it’s time to go up. The top rope Fameasser looks to set up the FU but Orton snaps him throat first across the top again. The Punt is loaded up but Cena pulls him into the STFU. Orton finally makes the rope and grabs an RKO for two, though he comes up favoring his knee. Said knee is launched into the air with another FU to retain the title at 21:30.

Rating: B-. They were trying but it wasn’t there yet, with Orton not really feeling like a major threat to take the title. The RKO was his big weapon and that didn’t work, so there wasn’t any reason to stay out there any longer. You could tell they were going for the big showdown here but Orton wasn’t quite ready to be the top threat.

From Unforgiven 2007.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is defending and his father (recently attacked by Orton to make this personal) is in the front row. Cena starts fast and hits a heck of a clothesline as this is more personal than being about the title. Orton is knocked outside and dropped again out there but it’s too early for the STFU. The quick chase lets Orton hit the hanging DDT for two and Cena gets pulled into the chinlock (oh this is going to be a long collection).

A headlock takeover cuts Cena off again and it’s already off to the sleeper and then the chinlock, with Orton really mixing things up here. Cena finally fights up to start the comeback and slugs away in the corner. He gets angry enough to shove the referee for the DQ at 7:21.

Rating: D+. Yeah that’s not a pay per view title match. I completely get what they were going for here, but that’s not worthy of this spot. You do this in the main event of Raw or something, not here where it’s supposed to be some big moment, especially not a month after Cena already beat Orton clean. This did not work and it’s not a good sign when “at least they didn’t waste more time before doing this stupid finish” is the highlight.

Post match Orton goes after Cena Sr. so Cena Jr. jumps him and grabs an STFU on the floor. Cena Sr. even gets in a Punt and is allowed to walk to the back.

From No Way Out 2008.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending, having been awarded the title after Cena got hurt but Cena is back early for revenge and the title. An early small package gives Cena two as this is already off to a rather different start. The fans are split and Cena points it out to Orton, who seems….well about the same as usual. Orton is back up to send him into the corner for some right hands but Cena grabs his running bulldog for two.

A kick to the chest (recently repaired) puts Cena down but he’s able to pull Orton into a rollup for two more. Cena charges into an elbow in the corner and gets punched down again, allowing Orton to stomp on the ankle. Orton pounds on the pectoral muscle (quite the odd visual) and grabs a headlock to block the ProtoBomb. That’s switched into a chinlock for a bit, at least until Cena is up with the flying shoulders.

Now the ProtoBomb connects to set up the Shuffle but Orton bails to the floor in a smart move. Cena isn’t having that and pulls him back inside to slug it out, with Orton grabbing the backbreaker. That bangs up Orton’s knee though and Cena goes up, only to miss the top rope Fameasser.

Orton can’t follow up so Cena grabs the ProtoBomb into the STFU, with Orton very slowly making the rope. That’s enough for Orton to roll outside and hold his knee, demanding that he be counted out. Cena goes after him and gets RKO’d, which is good for a nine count. Back in and Cena wants to fight so Orton slaps the referee for the DQ at 15:49.

Rating: B-. This was more like it, with Orton being more interesting as the champion rather than challenging. Cena isn’t likely to lose to Orton in a straight fight so Orton using his twists and turns to cheat and retain is a smart way to go. Orton also felt more on Cena’s level here, as it’s better to have him knocking Cena back down the mountain than trying to take his spot. The ending being a way to set up another match isn’t great to see again, though adding HHH for the three way at Wrestlemania wasn’t much better.

Post match Cena can’t get the referee to change his mind so he beats up Orton instead.

From Summerslam 2009.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is challenging and they actually go technical to start, which goes to an early standoff. Orton takes over on the corner and drops Cena with an elbow to the face. It’s already time for the slow stomping, with Orton going around in a circle before the big knee drop gets two. The backbreaker gives Orton two more and we’re already on the chinlock. Cena fights out and goes with an early finishing sequence, including a rather well received Shuffle.

Orton pops up with a powerslam but misses another powerslam. Cena is right there with his own missed shoulder though, sending him crashing out to the floor. The hanging DDT gives Orton two but Cena is right back with the top rope Fameasser for two of his own. The AA is broken up though and it’s a double clothesline to put them both down. Back up and…Orton shoves the referee for the DQ at 13:30.

Before I can “oh come on, again?”, we get the announcement that Mr. McMahon has ordered the match to restart and if Orton gets disqualified again, he loses the title. Back in and Cena gets two off a side slam and Orton is sent outside. Orton gets a whip into the steps to put Cena down for a change and drops him for two more back inside. That’s enough for Orton to grab his title and walk out for the countout at 17:04.

McMahon, restart again, same stipulation that we got for DQ’s. Back in and both finishers are escaped so Orton grabs a rollup and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin at 18:04. Cue another referee to say what happened so we restart it AGAIN. Cena pulls Orton into the STF but a “fan” (played by Brett DiBiase, who never went anywhere in WWE) runs in to jump the referee. Security takes him out and we pause again, with Orton going outside, where he snaps Cena’s throat over the top. The RKO FINALLY retains the title at 20:44.

Rating: C+. These matches are managing to avoid bleeding together, but it’s like they’re trying to find different ways to up the silliness on these finishes. Orton having one of his minions out there to save him is right on point but they did one too many restarts for the point to work. Cena has a legitimate complaint for the loss, but dang they need to have someone win one of these things clean already.

From Breaking Point, a month later.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging in an I Quit match, which should mix things up a bit. Also, if anyone interferes on Orton’s behalf, he loses the title. They stare at each other to start before Cena powers him into the corner for the release fisherman’s suplex. The running shoulder misses (again) and Cena is knocked outside for the trip to the announcers’ table. A monitor to the head knocks Cena silly and the threat of the hanging DDT won’t make him quit.

The DDT drops him again and it’s time to bring in a chair. The RKO onto the chair is blocked and Cena fires off the finishing sequence but the STF is broken up. They go outside with Cena being whipped into the steps, with Orton stomping his head onto said steps. That’s still not enough for the quitting so naturally Orton pulls out handcuffs to attach Cena to the top rope. With that not working either, Orton uncuffs him but then cuffs Cena’s wrists together, which he wraps over the top of the post.

That leaves Cena’s arms over his head and the rest of him pretty much wide open, with Orton hammering on his ribs. Cena won’t quit but he will spit some water in Orton’s face, which seems to be less than brilliant. Orton grabs a kendo stick and unloads on Cena’s ribs but Cena still won’t quit. A low blow gives Cena a needed breather but Orton is back up with a nasty chair shot to the head.

Orton cuffs him around the post this time and another chair to the back puts Cena down again. Cena ducks another chair shot though and hits a backdrop, allowing him to grab the key. With the cuffs off, Cena attaches himself to Orton instead and they go back inside…where Orton gets the RKO. That doesn’t mean much though and Cena pulls him into the STF, with Orton’s own arm doing the choking, for the submission at 19:49.

Rating: B. Yeah this was a definite step up, as they got away from the same formula that they had done so many times. I remember watching this live and the beating seemed to go on a lot longer, so the pace wasn’t as slow as I was expecting. Cena finding a way to win in the end is fine as you know he’s pulling that off, but at least they had a better match on the way there.

From Hell In A Cell 2019.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Cena is defending inside the Cell. Orton tries to get out but Cena cuts that off and they go inside, with Orton taking over. The big shoulder misses again so they go outside, where Cena is fine enough to muscle him up for some rams into the Cell. A charging version doesn’t work so well though and Cena is sent hard into the Cell and the steps. Said steps are (after a failed attempt) thrown inside but Cena avoids the hanging DDT and throws the steps at Orton’s head.

Cena doesn’t however avoid the backbreaker so Orton can take over again. Now the hanging DDT can connect but Cena is right back with a quick AA for two. The super AA doesn’t work and Orton slowly takes over again, with a chair to the back getting two more. Orton starts hearing voices but Cena gets away from the running knee on the chair to the head.

The STF goes on and naturally the ropes don’t mean anything (points for getting the rule right) so Orton goes after the referee again. Back in and Orton taps so naturally Cena goes to wake the referee up, earning himself an RKO for two in the process. Orton gets creative by tying Cena’s arms in the ropes and THEN grabbing a chinlock. That’s enough to load up a Punt for the pin and the title at 21:25, even with the knee banged up.

Rating: B-. It’s ok, but the Cell only added so much to the whole thing. They probably could have done the same thing with a street fight, but that’s not how the schedule worked around this point. At the same time, this didn’t feel anything like a blowoff match, despite being in the Cell. How can these two just not get this stuff right?

From Bragging Rights, three weeks later.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending in an anything goes, falls count anywhere sixty minute Iron Man match (thirty second rest period between falls) and if Cena loses, he’s off Raw. They take their time to start (obviously) and Cena grabs a headlock to grind away for a bit. Back up and Orton knocks him into the corner before blocking the running bulldog. The slow beating continues but Cena pulls him into a quick STF for the very fast tap at 3:55.

Cena – 1
Orton – 0

Orton takes him down to start and drops the jumping knee, setting up the rather expected chinlock. Cena powers out and hits a Throwback of all things, plus a top rope Fameasser. The Shuffle is loaded up but Orton pops to his feet for the RKO to tie the score at 9:00.

Cena – 1
Orton – 1

Back up and Orton knocks him off the apron for a crash into the barricade. It’s time to clear off the announcers’ table, with Orton hitting Cena in the head with a monitor for two on the floor. Lawler thinks maybe Cena should have taken the fall, for the rest period. This continues a nice trend of the match, with Lawler playing this mostly straight and the other commentators actually asking his opinion as the expert.

That’s WAY too rare in all modern wrestling and it’s very refreshing to see. Orton gets two off a microphone to the head and hold on as we pause for the cut on Cena’s head from the monitor shot. The clock actually stops for a bit, only to come back at the same time as Cena goes nuts. That doesn’t last long though as Orton gets in the signature whip into the steps to cut him off.

They go back inside, with Orton hammering on the cut as we have 15:00 down. The RKO is countered though and Cena is able to initiate the finishing sequence, with the Shuffle connecting. The AA is loaded up but Orton counters into an RKO (that looked GREAT and Lawler can’t believe he pulled that off) for…actually a double pin at 16:47.

Cena – 2
Orton – 2

The medics use the rest period (seems to be two of them, which makes sense at the double pin) to check on Cena’s cut before Orton misses a charge into the post. A super AA plants Orton hard for the pin at 19:23.

Cena – 3
Orton – 2

Cue Legacy to jump Cena between the falls (remember, anything goes) and Orton, who has still not gotten up, gets the pin at 20:21.

Cena – 3
Orton – 3

Kofi Kingston runs in with a chair to chase Legacy off (good, as otherwise there’s no reason for them to leave) and the two people actually in the match can barely get up. They go up to the entrance, with Cena being rammed into the tech area (uh oh). Orton finds a control panel and presses a button, which sets off some pyro. Realizing that could be fun later, Orton throws him through some of the set for more explosions and the pin at 25:20.

Cena – 3
Orton – 4

With Cena still down, Orton goes over to play with the pyro board some more and now he has an idea. Cena is nice enough to crawl onto the stage so Orton can crack him with a chair and drag him to the middle of the stage. Then Orton uses the pyro to blow Cena up, because he’s a bit out there and just making him give up to a spinning toehold is too much to ask.

They go back to ringside and Cena is whipped into the steps again as they’re clearly (and fairly) burning off some time by laying around a good bit. We’re halfway done as Orton throws the steps at Cena’s head and stomps away to leave him laying. Orton grabs a chair for a hard shot to the post, which is at least in the vicinity of Cena’s back. They get back inside and Cena grabs a small package to tie it up at 32:47.

Cena – 4
Orton – 4

Orton jumps him during the rest period and gets yelled at for not giving Cena “thirty seconds”. You know, about five minutes after ORTON TRIED TO BLOW CENA UP. Geez I love stupid wrestling logic. Anyway the hanging DDT on the floor gives Orton another pin at 35:06.

Cena – 4
Orton – 5

And yes, the attempted murderer does give Cena thirty seconds this time, apparently having learned his lesson. They go back inside with Orton stomping away and dropping the big knee for two more. Orton slowly hammers away but misses a charge and gets caught with a quick shot. That’s enough for Orton to bail out to the floor, where he looks at the clock (20:00 to go) and realizes it’s time to burn the clock.

Cena slowly follows him up and lands a heck of a right hand to send Orton back to the ring, meaning Cena has to burn more energy (and time) to get to him again. For some reason Orton lets him get inside again and tries a hanging DDT. That’s reversed into an AA attempt, which sends Orton running into the crowd. Is there any reason why Orton hasn’t run out to the parking lot and driven away? That would seem to be a better option than going anywhere Cena could catch him.

Naturally Cena catches him in the crowd and hits him with a trashcan, which has Orton staggering back down the steps. We have 15:00 to go as Orton is sent back to ringside for two. Cena sends him into the steps and then through the barricade as you can see the energy coming back for Cena with 12:00 to go. Cena hits him with the steps for some payback and then sets up a pair of steps near the announcers’ table. The AA through the table destroys Orton (who sells it like he’s on fire) to tie it up with 9:14 to go.

Cena – 5
Orton – 5

Orton is still down at the end of the rest period so Cena is smart enough to cover him again for two. Lawler: “How did he do that???” You mean how did he kick out of a move after he had more time to recover? Cena loads up another table and picks up Orton, who is described as dead weight, but he can kick out. Why Cena doesn’t put on the STF on the floor is beyond me as they get back inside with six minutes to go. Cole: “When is the last time you saw John Cena use a table?” He asks this as he’s standing because Cena broke the table he was at less than four minutes ago.

Anyway Cena misses a top rope legdrop through the table and they’re both down with 5:00 to go. They take their sweet time (well over a minute) getting up and slug it out until Cena starts firing off the shoulder. The referee is knocked down by mistake so the RKO connects to no cover.

Another referee comes in for the two so Orton shoves the new referee down at 2:00 to go. Orton goes nuts and starts rubbing his own head until he gets an idea. Apparently that was just to set up the Punt, which Cena reverses into the STF (and he’s cranking on the chinlock this time). Orton is in trouble for almost 45 seconds until he taps with 4 seconds left.

Cena – 6
Orton – 5

And of course time expires because Orton has to obey the rest period, which wouldn’t matter anyway so we’re done at 60:00.

Rating: B. Oh this is a tricky one, as I like a lot of it, but there was a time where they just felt like they were getting ridiculous, with Orton having basically no reason to do anything but run for a long time. Now that being said, once Cena started his comeback, it got a lot better, but it felt like a collection of a bunch of stuff at times with only a loose idea throughout the whole thing. It worked, but it felt like it could have been more with a little better planning and more coherence.

From TLC 2013.

Raw World Title/Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

TLC match, winner take all to unify the titles. They fight into the corner to start and Cena grabs a headlock. That’s broken up and Cena is sent outside, allowing Orton to set up the first ladder. Cena is right in to break it up so Orton grabs a chair and knocks him silly. Another chair shot only hits chair so Cena takes it back and unloads on him to take over.

Naturally it takes too long to set up a table though and Orton sends him hard into the steps. There is a table set up in the corner but it’s still way too early for Orton to get up the ladder, as Cena makes the save. The right hands are cut off with the scoop powerslam and Orton gets another ladder. Cena manages to go up instead, only to get suplexed right back down. Orton gets so frustrated that he throws a ladder at Cena, which hits the floor instead.

Some chair shots to the back have some better luck and Orton loads the chair up in the corner. That takes too long again so Cena initiates the finishing sequence, with the Shuffle being broken up. Orton sends him into the chair and goes up but gets pulled down again, at least with a touch of the titles this time. A ladder shot sends Orton off the apron and through a table so Cena can go up.

Orton is back up with a save of his own and an RKO drops Cena again. Cena gets up as well and hits him with the steps a few times, which allows him to set up another table in another corner. Again that takes too long and Orton stomps him onto the steps, followed by some mic shots to the head. Orton loads up the announcers’ table and of course takes too long, earning an AA through said table.

Cena goes for the belts but Orton is right there to turn the ladder over, leaving Cena hanging. That lets Orton pick up a chair and Cena is left helpless, which doesn’t really work when you notice that his feet are beneath the top rope, meaning there is pretty much nothing preventing him from dropping down on his own. Some chair shots bring him down but Orton is back up with a spear through one of the tables in the corner. They’re both down so Orton goes outside and finds a reference to Breaking Point, as he whips out some handcuffs to attach Cena to the bottom rope.

This time Orton gets smart by throwing the key into the crowd before hitting Cena with a ladder. Orton loads up another ladder but Cena unscrews the turnbuckle and gets free. That lets him go up and hit Orton with the turnbuckle, only to have Orton grab the rope (as Cena is still handcuffed). Cena is pulled head first into the other table in the corner and Orton wins at 24:35.

Rating: B. This was fun in a lot of ways, at least partially due to Cole sounding like a moron so many times. They were going for the violence here and as usual, that’s more interesting than seeing them have a regular match. You can only get so much out of that and thankfully they didn’t try to do anything too complicated. Cena’s crash into the table looked rough and Orton felt like he won, which is how this should wrap up.

From the 2014 Royal Rumble, a month later.

WWE Championship: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging in a straight match for a change. They go to the mat to start and the Pittsburgh fans go from BORING to LET’S GO CENA to CENA SUCKS in the first thirty seconds. Orton gets in a headlock takeover and it’s off to the DANIEL BRYAN chants. Cena gets to his feet and turns up the pace but gets cut right back off. After a You Can’t See Me, Orton grabs a suplex for two as the fans switch to a RANDY SAVAGE chant. Orton grinds away on a chinlock and yeah those BORING chants are getting louder.

They go outside with Cena being sent into the steps (it’s like an old friend at this point) before Daniel Bryan gets another chant as Orton gets two. A DDT gets the same and the fans either want Angle or Divas, but get an Orton pose instead. Cena initiates the finishing sequence and smiles at the booing crowd, who aren’t sure what to do as Orton breaks up the Shuffle. Orton’s superplex is broken up as well and Cena hits a top rope Fameasser for two more.

The AA is countered into Orton’s backbreaker for another near fall as they’re playing up the idea that they know each other so well, but everyone knows this stuff so it’s only so interesting. The hanging DDT is countered with a backdrop to send Orton outside, where he grabs the hanging DDT onto the floor. Back in and the RKO is countered into an STF, which is broken up just as fast.

The referee goes down so Cena the STF for an unseen tap. Naturally Cena goes to check on the referee and gets belted in the face for two as the referee is back in it. Cena pops up for an AA and a near fall, followed by an RKO and a near fall for Orton. Fans: “WE WANT DIVAS!” Naturally Orton does his pose right in the middle of the ring because he’s at least leaning into the thing. The Punt and AA are both countered so Orton pulls Cena into an STF (with a kind of cool looking sleeper variation) and the fans aren’t sure how to take that one.

Cena escapes so Orton gives him an AA (more an FU really, as he doesn’t drop down with Cena), leaving him with quite the massive smile. Back up and Cena gives him an RKO (nice one at that) before trying the super AA. That’s broken up so Orton settles for a tornado DDT into the STF….and we’ve got Wyatts. The fans go NUTS for something different and the Wyatts show up on the apron for a distraction. One more RKO retains the title at 20:50.

Rating: C+. So this is the night of the infamous Royal Rumble, where the crowd completely hijacked the show in the name of Daniel Bryan. That’s the well known instance, but this is another case of the same thing. The fans did not want to see this match and they let Orton and Cena know about it. Now of course Orton leaned all the way into it and rolled with the hatred and it worked well, though Cena was basically just doing his thing.

Now, why did they react this way? Well it’s not that surprising really. First of all, we were less than a month removed from Orton beating Cena in the big unification match, so it’s not like this was anything new. Then you factor in that this is the Royal Rumble, which has a reputation of being the show with what is little more than a token title defense before we find out the winner of the Royal rumble to set up Wrestlemania. That leaves you with a match where there is little reason to believe the title is going to change hands between a pairing that the fans do not want to see. How did WWE expect this to go?

The match itself was pretty much the norm for Cena and Orton as well, which is where things fell apart even more. The problem is we’ve seen Orton vs. Cena over and over and you know what you’re going to get. It’s clear that the fans were not interested in seeing this again but WWE trots them out one more time, which is where it fell apart. Having them steal finishers and then the Wyatt interfering worked, but this was a case where the fans weren’t interested and finally snapped. It’s a fascinating moment and WWE kind of had it coming.

And from Backlash 2025.

Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Cena, now a heel for a big change, is defending and Orton, the hometown star, gets an absolute monster pop as the fans sing with their Voices. They take their time to start with Cena offering a handshake and then slapping Orton in the face. That earns him a big slap back from Orton, who grabs a headlock to keep Cena in trouble. Cena gets knocked outside but takes over out there, meaning it’s some right hands to Orton back inside.

The fans count along so Orton switches places with him for twenty right hands, much to Orton’s….I guess we can call that delight. The big knee drop connects for two so Cena grabs a sleeper of all things. Orton gets a suplex to escape but Cena is right back with the finishing sequence. The AA is of course escaped and a powerslam puts Cena right back down. Cena’s STF attempt doesn’t exactly work as Orton is back up with the hanging DDT. The RKO is countered into an AA, which is countered into an RKO (that still looks awesome) and they’re both down again.

Now the AA can actually connect for two so Cena goes back to the flying shoulders. It turns out that sticking your neck out is a bad idea against Randy Orton, who grabs an RKO to put Cena down again. The Punt is loaded up but Cena is back with an AA for another near fall. Another RKO is countered and the referee gets taken down so Cena hits a third AA. That makes Cena smile, which can’t go well. Cena grabs his trusty belt and walks into an RKO for a pretty slow two.

They go outside with Cena knocking Orton into the referee into the steps, leaving Orton to AA Cena through the announcers’ table. Orton loads up another table for another AA, with the fans declaring this awesome. Another referee runs down to count the near fall so Cena belts him by mistake. Orton hits an RKO and there’s no one to count, so here is Nick Aldis to check on the referee.

Agents come in so it’s a bunch of RKOs to take them down as the fans go even nutsier. R-Truth comes in to cut off the Punt and gets RKO’d (with Orton screaming WHY at him). That means a low blow can cut Orton off, followed by the belt shot so the original referee can count the retaining pin at 27:48.

Rating: B+. It was ridiculous, it was stupid, it was insane at times, and I had a lot of fun with the thing. They were going with the idea of the two of them being treated as this legendary pair and it was happening one last time so they just had a bunch of fun. It felt like a big song and dance medley to wrap up their feud and with that in mind, it was a great time.

Overall Rating: B. The big criticism of Orton vs. Cena is that it was done to death and that was really obvious here. It’s not so much that the matches were bad, but it was basically treated like this all time epic rivalry and that never felt earned. Cena vs. Punk or Edge just feel like such bigger deals and more natural, but Orton got so much of the attention. I did like watching some of these matches, but there wasn’t one on here where I was looking forward to seeing it again. That’s Orton vs. Cena in a nutshell, as it’s good but not exactly great and nothing you would really want to see.

 

 

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Forgotten Cell Matches
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

This is another idea where the name says it all, which makes for an interesting situation. In this case we have the most violent match WWE has to offer but you never know which version of things you’ll be getting. I’m curious about this set as there have been so many of these things over the years that it is easy to forget some of them. Let’s get to it.

From Monday Night Raw, June 15, 1998.

Steve Austin/Undertaker vs. Mankind/Kane

Paul Bearer is here with the villains and wants Austin and Undertaker out here right now. Mankind even goes into a rhyming poem about the violence of the Cell (with the mesh ripping up your flesh) to help get them come to the ring. Austin comes out but Undertaker doesn’t show up, which seems like a ruse. Mankind goes after Austin on the floor but gets the door slammed onto him.

Kane goes after Austin and Bearer locks himself in the Cell (uh oh) as Kane gets an ugly backdrop on the ramp. And indeed the Undertaker pops up through the ring and kicks Bearer in the face as the beating is on. Kane climbs the Cell as Austin comes back to beat up Mankind.

Bearer gets sent into the cage and is busted open, with Undertaker kicking at the head as Mankind is sent into the Cell wall. Austin knocks Mankind down with a chair and goes up top to beat up Kane as the show ends. If there was an opening bell, I never heard it, but this was just a big angle anyway, with Austin never even getting inside the Cell.

From Monday Night Raw, August 24, 1998.

Mankind vs. Kane

Mankind starts throwing chairs at the roof of the Cell but they fall back onto him. Instead he climbs up but gets pulled down by Undertaker (at ringside), sending him through the table (JR: “IT HAPPENED AGAIN!”). Kane beats Mankind around ringside and slams the Cell door on his head as they both finally get inside. The door is locked and we’ll say the match officially starts.

Kane beats on him with the steps before hitting a big dive over the top for the crash. Mankind avoids the steps being tossed and chairs Kane in the head before pouring out the bag of tacks. That takes too long (of course) and Kane kicks him into the tacks, only for Mankind to come back with the Mandible Claw. The Cactus piledriver puts Kane down but he’s back up with a nasty chair shot to knock him off the top.

The chokeslam and Tombstone knock Mankind silly and Undertaker gives Kane the throat slit. Three straight chair shots to the head set up another Tombstone onto the chair but Austin comes out from under the ring to jump Kane for the….I’m thinking DQ but we’ll say no contest at 4:28.

Rating: D. Yeah that’s what Russo thought the Cell should be: nothing more than a way to build up a PPV match between Undertaker and Austin was to have the Tag Team Champions (yes Kane and Mankind were a team here) fight in the Cell. The match wasn’t even the main event of the show, as there were two more matches to go, plus part of the Brawl For All. I would say I get the idea, but I really don’t, as it’s that stupid in so many ways.

Post match Austin unloads on Kane with the chair and a Stunner as Undertaker is on top of the Cell trying to get inside. The Cell is raised (with Undertaker still on it) and Austin gives Kane another Stunner.

From Monday Night Raw, September 26, 2011 (post show dark match).

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Jack Swagger vs. CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Cena is defending and this is a match thrown together after a big beatdown of Cena and Punk ended the show. Ziggler (short hair version) and Swagger choke Punk in the corner as Del Rio beats on Cena in another corner. Swagger and Del Rio change places but Cena fights back and gets in a bulldog. Del Rio cuts Cena off again and Cena hits a Vader Bomb for two with Punk making the save (this is basically a five way match in name only as it’s basically a handicap tag).

Cena is back up with the finishing sequence to Del Rio as everyone else fights on the floor. As usual the AA doesn’t work so Punk gives Del Rio a GTS. That earns him a Zig Zag before Swagger ankle locks Ziggler. An AA to Swagger retains at 5:09. Punk’s “oh well” look as his eyes go back and forth boosts things up a lot.

Rating: C. To be fair, it’s a dark match so you can only get so mad at something like this. The point here wasn’t to blow the roof off the place or anything close, but rather just have a fun match to wrap up the night. That’s all they did and it went fairly well, though it really did just feel like a tag match for the most part.

From the June 18, 2021 Smackdown.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Rey Mysterio

Reigns (who recently attacked Mysterio’s son Dominik) is defending and has to take a chair away from a swinging Mysterio to start. A fire extinguisher to the head (spray and canister) work a bit better for Mysterio, as does a running shot with a toolbox. We take a break and come back with Mysterio striking away with a chair.

Said chair is wrapped around Reigns’ throat and sent into various things and a quick Reigns spear only hits (and breaks) table. A sunset bomb is blocked though and Reigns sends Mysterio into the Cell over and over. We take another break and come back again with a spear being countered via a dropkick.

Another spear attempt only hits post and Mysterio gets in the 619. Now the chair shots can work a bit better and Mysterio splashes the chair onto Reigns in a less than brilliant move. A chairless frog splash can connect for two so Mysterio tries the seated senton, only to get LAUNCHED into the Cell with a toss powerbomb. The cravate choke makes Mysterio tap at 17:13.

Rating: B. Believe it or not, Mysterio knows how to fight a power guy in a match where he can use weapons to even things up. This is what Mysterio has done for so much of his career and it still worked here. While Mysterio winning was a long shot, he’s enough of a legend that it just kind of barely feels possible and that’s more than enough. Not a great match, but for free TV, I’ll definitely take it.

From the June 21, 2021 Monday Night Raw (yes, the second time in four days).

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Xavier Woods

Lashley, with MVP (as canceled out by Kofi Kingston) is defending. Woods hits an early dropkick into the corner but Lashley is right back with some shoulders to the ribs. A clothesline takes Woods down again and a lifting Downward Spiral gives Lashley two. They go to the floor and fight over a chair, which Lashley punches into Woods’ face.

Back in and Woods knocks him to the floor again, with a dropkick through the ropes connecting. A chair shot knocks Lashley down on the floor and Woods gets to unload with chair shots. We take a break and come back with Lashley choking away before tying him up in the ring skirt. Woods’ comeback is cut off again and Lashley steps on his head.

Woods realizes that having his head stepped on isn’t great (sit down Tony Atlas) and kicks out the leg in a smart move. Some kendo stick shots put Lashley on the floor and a wheelbarrow faceplant gives Woods two. A springboard tornado DDT gets the same and an amazing Limit Breaker puts Lashley through a table (with Woods almost overshooting him) for two more. Back up and Lashley sends him face first into the chair in the corner, meaning the spear can connect as well. The Hurt Lock retains the title at 13:30.

Rating: C+. This is where the opponent comes into play. Woods is incredibly talented and it’s very cool to see him getting this kind of a shot. However, unlike the Mysterio match, it never once felt like the title was in jeopardy. Mysterio was a long shot, but he felt like he had a prayer. That wasn’t the case here and it gave the match a very different dynamic (and not necessarily in a bad way). Lashley was on a roll at this point though and it was clear why he was smashing through so many people.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a weird collection as “Forgotten” is kind of a misleading title (if nothing else, it’s hard to forget a match that didn’t air in the first place). It’s more like “Cell Matches At TV Shows” and one of them didn’t seem to even be a match in the first place.

There’s a reason the Cell isn’t used at TV very often, as it felt out of place here. Throw in doing it twice in four days (apparently due to the TV networks being jealous of each other (seriously) and it was kind of a weird time. That being said, it’s still fun to look back like this, as these went through multiple eras that you might have….forgotten. Ok they win.

 

 

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Summerslam 2025 Night Two
Date: August 3, 2025
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 60,561
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

So the big story of 2025 was the John Cena heel turn as he was on his way out of the company and on his way to retiring. That had been going on for about six months, and then on the Smackdown before this show, Cena basically threw the whole thing out the window and he’s a good guy again. So now he’s defending the title against Cody Rhodes in a street fight, hero vs. hero. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the bigger matches of Night One.

Druski welcomes us to the show and talks about how things are going to be bigger tonight. We get some short previews for the bigger matches as well. I still can’t stand this whole “it’s all about the moments” jazz as it takes the focus off of the matches and makes it more about one tiny part.

Here is HHH to get things going. You haven’t seen anything yet and this is going to be big. And that’s about it.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Naomi vs. Iyo Sky

Naomi is defending and her father gets to play her to the ring in a really cool moment. You can see how much it means to Naomi and she looks to be having a blast out there. The bell rings and Naomi bails out to the floor, so the other two stare down at her. The case doesn’t go well for Naomi, who gets caught on the way back inside. Ripley accidentally kicks Sky down by mistake though and Naomi is right there with a double high crossbody.

Naomi goes after Sky but Ripley is up to grab Naomi’s hair to quite the reaction. A bite to the hand seems to put Ripley on the floor though and Naomi gives Sky a hanging X Factor for two. Ripley is back in and grabs a front facelock on Sky, with Naomi’s springboard spinning kick to the head knocking both of them down. Naomi kicks the heck out of Ripley and does the same to Sky as this is pretty much all Naomi thus far. She even mocks Sky’s dance…but realizes Ripley is waiting on her.

Ripley fires off the clotheslines and Sky is back in with a 619 to put Naomi outside, leaving us with quite the showdown. An electric chair faceplant gives Ripley two but the Riptide is countered into a small package. The crossface has Ripley in more trouble so she’s right back up, only for Sky to SPIKE HER with a poisonrana. Naomi has to make the save so Ripley kicks her in the head.

A Razor’s Edge gets two on Sky, with Naomi making another save. They fight on the floor until Sky takes them out with an Asai moonsault, which is all the more impressive as you see Sky’s toes catching the rope on the way up. Back in and Sky hits some running Bullet Train Attacks to both of them but Naomi catches her up top. Naomi’s split legged moonsault hits Ripley but Sky’s Over The Moonsault lands on Ripley as well, with Naomi rolling Sky up for a fast two.

Sky gets kneed in the face to send her outside, leaving Ripley to grab Riptide for two, with Sky making a great looking diving save. Sky and Ripley strike it out, with Naomi being knocked outside for daring to interfere. Ripley cannonballs onto Naomi and then breaks up Over The Moonsault. That means a super Riptide to Sky but Naomi runs in to roll Ripley up, with trunks, and steal the pin to retain at 16:23.

Rating: A-. This was great stuff, with everyone working hard and a feeling that any of the three could leave with the title. It was just a hair behind the Wrestlemania triple threat but dang this worked, with Naomi deserving all kinds of credit. She was more than hanging with the other two and that is more than worth some praise. Outstanding opener here and probably Naomi’s best match ever.

Post match Ripley is TICKED, as she should be.

It’s 25 years since the first TLC match so the Hardys and the Dudleys are both here.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. Wyatt Sicks vs. Andrade/Rey Fenix vs. DIY vs. Fraxiom vs. Motor City Machine Guns

The Wyatts are defending in a TLC match and my goodness does that entrance not really work in the daylight. Everyone looks up at the titles to start and everyone else jumps the Wyatts to start fast. The Wyatts are sent outside and the Guns dropkick a ladder into DIY. Fraxiom and Sabin hit some dives and it’s Fraxiom bringing in the first ladder. After the Guns are dispatches, the Wyatts are back in to throw some chairs and clean house.

The Profits come back in to backdrop Gacy….next to a ladder, so they do it again and this time it connects. We get a tribute to the Dudleys as Dawkins tells Ford to get the tables (the Dudleys approve). That means building a big pile of tables at ringside as Ciampa hits Sabin with a chair. Andrade and Fenix remember they’re in the match and clear the ring, with Andrade trying to throw Fenix up to the belts in a brilliant bit.

That doesn’t work though so we get stereo Three Amigos to the Profits instead. DIY come back in with the chairs to start wrecking things, including throwing Ford into the corner…where he flip dives onto Fraxiom on the floor. Gacy gets missile dropkicked/Downward Spiraled into an open chair and Gargano makes it worse with One Final Beat through a table.

Lumis guillotine legdrops (kind of) Ford through another table and Fenix hits a heck of a frog splash to put Frazer through another table. Dawkins goes up (oh dear) and gets super Spanish Flied by Axiom through two tables (with Ciampa being smart enough to get out of the way). Cue Candice LeRae (Gargano’s wife) to go up the ladder (because reasons) but B-Fab (friend of the Profits) runs in for the save. Nikki Cross (of the Wyatts) goes in to suplex B-Fab off the ladder so LeRae goes up again, with Gargano holding the ladder for her.

Ford kicks Ciampa into Gargano though and LeRae gets sent crashing through a bridged ladder at ringside (Ford’s OH DANG look is great as LeRae is mostly dead). Naturally Gargano gives her a thumbs up and he goes up, with Ford cutting him off again. Cue Erick Rowan (a Wyatt not in the match) to make the save. Ford gets thrown into Dawkins but they get back up to beat on Rowan with some chairs. He’s put through a table as well, which should put him down for a bit. Ciampa goes up and grabs the belts but winds up hanging there.

Frazer tries a dive but Ciampa pulls himself up (geez), allowing Gargano to set up a ladder. Ford springboards onto the ladder and Ciampa is knocked down, leaving a bunch of people to go up for the belts. Uncle Howdy comes in to shove the ladders over, with DIY getting the big crash through the four (well three of them) tables. Frazer gets Mandible Clawed on top of the ladder and Fenix gets the same treatment, with Andrade making the save. A sunset bomb sends Howdy onto the ladder but the Wyatts who are actually in the match make the save with some chairs. Gacy goes up and retains the titles at 16:03.

Rating: B+. I vaguely remember not being overly impressed with this but it was a rather awesome spectacle that could have been even better with one less team. The spot with the women was a good little bonus and it makes sense that the Wyatts would use their numbers advantage since they had so many challengers. Rather good stuff here, with some crazy big spots throughout.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Lyra Valkyria. They were partners for all of a day, winning the Women’s Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania and losing them back the next night. Lynch turned on her but Valkyria got the big upset at Backlash. Lynch took the Women’s Intercontinental Title from her and Valkyria had to raise her had. That was in addition to a German suplex though so we’ll do it one more time, with No DQ/No Countout in Valkyria’s last chance at the title.

Women’s Intercontinental Title: Lyra Valkyria vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is defending and anything goes. Valkyria starts fast with some whips into the corner and they’re quickly on the floor. Lynch sends her into the announcers’ table a few times and grabs a kendo stick, only for Valkyria to come back with a crowbar. Believe it or not the metal crowbar wins over the stick and Valkyria takes over.

Lynch is whipped into various things, including a photographer (with Valkyria immediately apologizing as that seemed to be a genuine accident) and over the announcers’ table. A dropkick puts Lynch down again so Valkyria loads up a table, only for Lynch to wrap a chain around her mouth. Back in and Lynch fires off some kendo stick shots but misses a golf swing to the head. Instead it’s a reverse layout DDT for two so let’s grab a toolbox and some chairs.

A drop toehold sends Valkyria face first into the open chair and the toolbox to the ribs gets two. Lynch opens the toolbox and finds a zip tie to basically handcuff Valkyria. That lets Lynch beat on her with a wrench and then tie her over the post, meaning it’s time for the kendo stick to the ribs. Back in and Valkyria tries to find something in the toolbox to cut the tie but somehow manages to get her arms around Lynch for a belly to belly suplex. The tie breaks…but that’s not supposed to happen, so Valkyria has to tie her own hands back together to start the comeback.

Valkyria strikes away and uses a chair for a step up dropkick, followed by a moonsault for two. Lynch is sent into the chair over and over and Valkyria takes a turnbuckle pad off, again having to make sure that her wrists stay together. Valkyria gets sent into the post though and goes outside, where she rolls underneath the ring. That lets her get in a blast with a fire extinguisher to blind Lynch, but more importantly Valkyria can use the sharp part of the extinguisher to cut her arms free (and on purpose this time).

The kendo stick comeback is on, with the stick being mostly broken over Lynch’s back. They fight outside again with Valkyria escaping the Manhandle Slam to put Lynch onto the steps for a big crash. Back in and Lynch manages to send her into the exposed buckle, setting up a Manhandle Slam onto the open chairs….for two. Lynch can’t believe it so they go outside again, with Valkyria being tied into a chair and rammed into the announcers’ table. The threat of a crowbar to the head is broken up by Bayley, with Lynch begging her to take out Valkyria.

With that not working, Lynch tries to hit Bayley with a chain and gets beaten up for her efforts. Lynch avoids a charge but goes over towards a table, with Valkyria diving out of nowhere to send her crashing through it, with Wade Barrett sounding stunned on commentary. Bayley is back up to swinging (complete with chain) at Valkyria but accidentally knocks Valkyria into the Manhandle Slam to retain the title at 25:05.

Rating: C. Dang I feel sorry for them as there was no coming back from that zip tie fiasco, but my goodness who thought this needed 25 minutes? It’s a match that desperately needed to have about ten minutes shaved off as they ran out of things to do somewhere in the middle. Valkyria was trying and punching over her head with a legend like Lynch, but no one was coming back from that zip tie mess.

We recap Solo Sikoa vs. Jacob Fatu. Sikoa has the MFT’s and the US Title but doesn’t think much of Fatu, who left the team after not liking Sikoa’s leadership. This includes framing Fatu for a crime, which didn’t work in the end as Fatu was out the same night. Fatu then wrecked Sikoa and company, setting up a title match inside of a cage. Makes enough sense, with the idea mainly being Fatu getting to wreck Sikoa once and for all.

US Title: Jacob Fatu vs. Solo Sikoa

Fatu is challenging inside of a cage. Sikoa actually tries to get Fatu back on the team and gets beaten up for his efforts. A running headbutt drops Sikoa but he’s able to block a ram into the cage. Instead Sikoa backdrops him into the cage and splashes him against it as things slow back down.

Sikoa calls for the door to be opened but opts to try the Samoan Spike, meaning it’s a double clothesline to put them both down instead. Fatu is back up to send him into the cage a few times and it’s an implant DDT into the moonsault…for two. Cue the MFTs so Jimmy Uso runs out to give them some superkicks.

Talla Tonga kicks him down but Fatu orders the cage door closed. The distraction lets Sikoa get in the Samoan Spike for two more. Fatu gets up and climbs, only to get chained to the cage by Talla. Naturally Fatu breaks the handcuffs (second match in a row with a similar theme) and goes after Sikoa, with Talla kicking the door into Fatu’s head. Sikoa falls out to retain at 13:06.

Rating: C. I’m not sure why they decided to take away the insanity that made Fatu feel like a star but it was missing here. Sikoa using all of his MFTs to retain is fine, but this didn’t feel like Sikoa escaping as much as he just won. I wasn’t into this one the first time around and that was the case again here. Just not much of a cage match.

Post match Jimmy Uso jumps JC Mateo and throws him inside, where Fatu gets to beat up the MFTs. Fatu goes up and moonsaults onto them for quite the huge crash.

We recap AJ Styles challenging Dominik Mysterio for the Intercontinental Title. Styles came back from an injury, got hurt again in his first match back, and then came back again, with Mysterio interrupting him. Styles wanted the Intercontinental Title but Mysterio kept claiming injury to avoid the match. For some reason Styles wore various disguises and attacked Mysterio, with the match being officially set.

Intercontinental Title: Dominik Mysterio vs. AJ Styles

Styles is challenging and comes to the arena in an Eddie Guerrero style low rider (and in an Eddie style Styles shirt) for the 20th anniversary of the Custody Of Dominik ladder match. Mysterio bails outside to start and gets chased back inside, where Styles hits a backbreaker. The chase is on again, with Mysterio 619ing Styles onto the apron, where a baseball slide puts him on the floor.

A big dive takes Styles down again and the slingshot hilo…doesn’t even give Mysterio one. They go up top and a super hurricanrana and super Styles Clash are both blocked, so Styles settles for a tornado DDT to put them both down. The Pele Kick rocks Mysterio again as the Fireflies are out for some reason. Mysterio is right back with a Michinoku Driver for two more so Styles grabs a nice brainbuster.

The frog splash misses so Mysterio hits a 619. This time Mysterio’s frog splash hits raised knees though and we’re off to the Calf Crusher. That’s broken up and the fans seem to be getting behind Mysterio. The referee gets distracted so Mysterio grabs a chair and throws it to Styles before dropping down.

Styles is smart enough to wrap the chair around his own head and fall down, leaving the referee unsure of what to do. Mysterio tries to go up so Styles kicks the rope into the low blow, setting up another Calf Crusher. This time Styles pulls Mysterio’s boot off, with the referee getting distracted again, allowing Mysterio to hit him with said boot. The frog splash retains the title at 10:47.

Rating: B. Now this was rather interesting as the fans got WAY behind Mysterio here, even openly cheering for him near the end. I don’t think that’s so much anti-Styles as much as it was Mysterio is rather good at his job. He is a lying cheater, but he’s just so good at being a lying cheater. How can you not like him at least a little bit? If nothing else, Mysterio is going to get to brag about the win for weeks and that’s entirely the point.

A replay shows Mysterio unzipping his boot, making it clear that Mysterio completely outsmarted Styles. That’s a great catch as that wasn’t obvious in the original airing.

Stephanie McMahon does the attendance announcement: 60,561, for a two night total of 113,722. Noted.

We recap John Cena defending the Smackdown World Title against Cody Rhodes. Evil Cena won the title from Rhodes at Wrestlemania and has beaten up various heroes since then. Now Rhodes wants one more title shot and wants to face the REAL Cena in a street fight. This led to Cena saying “ok then” and abandoning the heel turn in one of the funniest things I’ve seen in wrestling in years.

Smackdown World Title: Cody Rhodes vs. John Cena

Cena is defending in a street fight and Rhodes has a Dusty promo playing before his entrance, as you do. They hug to start and Cena whispers something to him before the brawl is on. They’re quickly on the floor with Cena being sent shoulder first into the steps. Back up and Cena grabs Tyrese Haliburton’s crutch and knocks Rhodes silly to take over. The steps are taken in and Cena drops Rhodes onto them, followed by throwing said steps over the top onto Rhodes, who comes up favoring his arm.

Back in and Rhodes snaps off a powerslam for two but Cena backdrops him right back to the floor for the big crash. They both grab chairs for the duel back inside, with Rhodes managing to get in the shot to take over. The chair is wedged into the corner and of course that doesn’t work, as Cena initiates the finishing sequence. The AA is broken up and Rhodes starts striking away, including the Bionic Elbow.

Rhodes gets two off the Cody Cutter but walks into the AA for the same. An electric chair gets two more so Rhodes is right back up with a piledriver. We pause for Cena to appear mostly dead, which is a way to sucker Rhodes into another AA. Back up and they slug it out until Rhodes grabs a pop up powerbomb of all things. Cena is right back with the STF though, sending Rhodes crawling over to the rope.

They’re back on the floor, where Rhodes sends him into the timekeeper’s area but Cena comes back up with a microphone. Naturally that sets up a Canadian Destroyer on the floor, setting up the AA through the announcers’ table. Naturally Rhodes kicks out at two and grabs a quick Cross Rhodes for two of his own. Cena knocks him off the top and hits the top rope Fameasser, followed by the AA for two more. With nothing else working, Cena puts a table in the corner but Rhodes fights back up and they go outside.

The fight heads into the crowd with Cena hitting him with a piece of barricade. Cena takes him underneath the stage….and they rise up on Rhodes’ elevator (with Cena giving an incredible smirk) for the AA onto the ramp. Unfortunately that means Cena has to grab him in a fireman’s carry and walk him all the way back to the ring, which is rather draining. It also lets Rhodes rest enough to send Cena through the table in the corner. The Cross Rhodes gets two and it’s time to unhook a turnbuckle.

Rhodes hits him in the face for two but Cena gets the STF with the rope. That’s reversed into a choke from Rhodes, who hits three straight Cross Rhodes for….two, as this keeps going. The frustrated Rhodes grabs the belt but walks into a pair of AA’s. Cena picks up the belt but throws it back down, instead going with the super AA for the rather near fall. Let’s get another table so Cena tries another super AA, which is reversed into a cutter through the table. After a salute, one more Cross Rhodes gives Rhodes the title back at 37:42.

Rating: B-. Uh, well, at least Travis Scott wasn’t here. The biggest issue here is of course that it was almost forty minutes long and really didn’t need to be even half of that. It didn’t help that they threw the personal issues out the window two days before. Cena did his part well enough and Rhodes felt like the better man, but this show had two No DQ/street fight matches that combined to go over an hour. That’s quite a bit of time to spend on such similar matches. What we got was good, but it never got beyond a certain point and then kept going.

Post match Cena presents Rhodes with the title and they say something to each other. Rhodes leaves and Cena soaks in the cheers…..and Brock Lesnar is back for the first time in I believe two years. Cena gives a look that says “oh man this is going to suck” and it’s an F5 to let Lesnar stand tall to end the show. I’m assuming that explains the rapid face turn and I’ve heard worse ideas. Like Lesnar squashing Cena next month and Cena never getting any revenge before retiring.

Overall Rating: B. The big problem here is the lack of regular wrestling. You had a No DQ match, a street fight, a cage match, a TLC match, a triple threat and one regular match. That isn’t exactly focusing on the traditional stuff and it made for a bit of an unbalanced show. Maybe swap one of these matches to the other night, just to mix things up a bit. Either way, the opening two matches and main event are enough to carry this, but the two No DQ matches went WAY too long and it hurt things a good bit.

Overall Overall Rating: B. As usual, there is a heck of a show in there if you combine the two nights together. There is also a good bit of filler and that holds things down a lot. What matters here is the bigger matches mostly delivered, with Punk vs. Gunther and the women’s triple threat being show stealers. It’s a rather nice first two night show, though it would still be better as a big show without all of the filler involved, also as usual.

Results
Naomi b. Rhea Ripley and Iyo Sky – Rollup with trunks to Ripley
Wyatt Sicks won a TLC match – Gacy pulled down the titles
Becky Lynch b. Lyra Valkyria – Manhandle Slam
Solo Sikoa b. Jacob Fatu – Sikoa escaped the cage
Dominik Mysterio b. AJ Styles – Frog splash
Cody Rhodes b. John Cena – Cross Rhodes

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 2021
Date: August 21, 2021
Location: Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 51,326
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s time for one of the biggest Summerslams ever, as this is the first major event after the attendance restrictions were lifted after the Coronavirus pandemic. They need a major main event to make that work and that is what they have with John Cena challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. Other than that, we have Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg for the WWE Title because we must have Goldberg. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Baron’s Happy days weren’t here yet. Some woman from Tik Tok is a guest ring announcer and Big E. doesn’t have his Money In The Bank briefcase as Corbin stole it from him. The rather sad Corbin clutches the briefcase and gets belly to belly suplexed to start. Big E. misses the apron splash though and Corbin is thrilled with the idea of winning via countout.

That doesn’t work so Corbin sends him into the post a few times, setting up the chinlock to keep Big E. down. A chokeslam is countered into a stretch muffler of all things but Corbin slips out and hits Deep Six for two. Corbin heads outside to grab the briefcase, earning himself a ram into the barricade. Back in and the Big Ending is good enough to finish Corbin at 6:31.

Rating: C. Set up a quick story on TV and then pay it off with a fast match here. That’s all you need to do for a Kickoff Show match and seeing the horrible loser take another loss will always work. Things would get better for Corbin soon, while Big E. would wind up having a pretty lame WWE Title reign, though at least he got there.

We’re in Las Vegas so the opening video has a poker theme, which lasts all of a few moments before going into the look at the matches, as expected. Also as expected, John Cena vs. Roman reigns feels way bigger than anything else.

Those stadium shows always look awesome and that is the case again here.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

RKBro is challenging after reuniting last week to go after the titles. Orton and Styles start (not a bad choice) with Orton sending him flying with an early suplex. It’s off to Riddle so Styles bails to the floor and assaults the announcers’ table. Back in and Styles hands it off to Omos for the big slam on Riddle. Styles puts the chinlock on but Riddle elbows his way out of the fireman’s carry. That lets Riddle hit a running knee on Omos but Styles is there to cut off a diving tag to Orton.

The comeback is on, including a backdrop to Styles and forearms to Omos. Orton powerslams Styles and, after knocking Omos off the apron, hits the hanging DDT. Omos saves Styles from the RKO though and then chokeslams Riddle onto the apron. Riddle is back up with a posting for Omos but Styles is back with a moonsault from the apron into a reverse DDT to drop Riddle hard. Back in and Styles blocks the RKO, only to get caught with the second attempt to give Orton the pin and the titles at 7:05.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t quite a classic but it makes perfect sense to put this on first. The fans loved RKBro and letting them have their big win was going to get the show started in the right direction. Styles and Omos were fine for a pretty nice title reign, but you’re only going to get so much out of that. Good choice for the opener here and Orton getting some focus is almost always a good thing.

Riddle being so freaking happy over the win is a great thing.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Eva Marie, which is over Bliss’ doll Lillie being all evil. Eva wanted Doudrop to go after Bliss but she was scared of the doll, meaning Eva and Doudrop aren’t in a great place coming in.

Eva Marie vs. Alexa Bliss

Doudrop is here with Marie. Sign in the crowd: “Eva Marie is worse than an airport tuna sandwich.” Points for creative, which cancels out the negative points for the massive CGI Lillie doll. During the entrance, we get a quick look at Lillie being able to sit up and wink, because of course she can. Bliss dodges a few charges to start and Eva falls out to the floor.

Back in and Bliss elbows her in the face as they’re going in very slow motion to start. Eva gets in a few shots but stops to slap Lillie, who she also uses to slap Bliss. That’s enough to send Bliss into a rage for some bad right hands, setting up a flipping splash for two. Doudrop insists that she believe in Eva as Lillie is sat back on top. Bliss sends her into the corner but misses Twisted Bliss to give Eva two. Back up and Bliss hits a DDT (which Marie falls too soon on) for the pin at 3:50. Doudrop seems well pleased.

Rating: D-. This was one of those matches that would have felt like a bad filler on Raw, let alone getting time on one of the biggest shows of the year. Eva was brought back in for star power but then she has a match like this and so much of it is dropped out the window. Bliss was better, but the Lillie stuff was killing her and that was getting more and more obvious every week.

Post match Doudrop makes sure to announce Eva as the loser of the match.

Mario Lopez, in a swank Hart Foundation shirt, brings in RKBro with Randy Orton promising that it is going to be smooths ailing for the team going forward. He’s still getting used to the Bro name though. Riddle has a surprise for him on Raw too, which would wind up being a scooter (with tassels).

United States Title: Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Priest is challenging after beating Sheamus in a non-title match, where he re-injured Sheamus’ nose (hence a protective mask). Sheamus headlocks him down to start before switching into a hammerlock. Back up and Priest rocks him with a right hand before muscling him up for the Broken Arrow. Sheamus is sent outside so there’s the running step up flip dive to take him out again.

Priest’s spin kick is countered and he gets sent hard into the post, meaning it’s time to slow down a bit. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock but Priest is right back up. That works for Sheamus, who plants him with the Irish Curse and stops to pose. Priest powers out of another chinlock and hurricanranas his way out of a powerbomb, only to get powerslammed for two more.

Back up and Sheamus stops to check his hair, allowing Priest to get in a running tornado DDT but his back seems to be flaring up. The back is fine enough to hit a top rope spinwheel kick but Sheamus snaps him throat first across the top to break up a…..something. A top rope clothesline into an Alabama Slam gives Sheamus two and frustration is setting in.

The Brogue Kick is countered with a kick to the head though and Priest grabs South Of Heaven for two more. Sheamus knees him out of the air for two of his own and it’s off to a heel hook of all things. Priest fights up and rips off the mask, allowing him to hammer away. A kick to the face sets up the Reckoning to give Priest the pin and the title at 13:49.

Rating: B-. That’s the kind of big time fight that you need to have in a spot like this and they did the right thing with the ending. Priest took every big thing that Sheamus had and then won clean with his finisher. WWE set Priest up in the last few months and then paid him off with a win here, which is what you’re supposed to do. Nicely done.

We recap Dominik Mysterio causing issues for his dad, because they have literally been teasing this split for over a year now.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Mysterios

The Usos are defending. Rey hammers on Jimmy to start but it’s too early for the 619. The Usos are both sent outside with Rey hitting the sliding splash, followed by a springboard dive from Dominik. Dominik comes in for Three Amigos to Jimmy but Jey breaks up the frog splash with a shove out to the floor. The top rope Demolition Decapitator hits Dominik for no cover and Jimmy adds a running headbutt for two.

Dominik tries to fight out of the corner and gets BLASTED with an uppercut to drop him again. Jey hits Two Amigos and stops to pose before shouting some Spanish. A neckbreaker gets Dominik out of trouble though and there’s the hot tag to Mysterio to start cleaning house.

The tornado DDT gets two on Jimmy and the top rope seated senton puts him down again. Everything breaks down and it’s a superkick into the Superfly Splash for two on Rey. Dominik is back in and gets dropped on the apron like the schmuck that he is. Jimmy misses another Superfly Splash but he raises his knees to block a frog splash. The double superkick sets up the Superfly Splash to retain the titles at 10:48.

Rating: C+. The Usos and Rey managed to overcome Dominik’s extreme level of bleh to have a decent match. The Usos are able to have a pretty good match against anyone and that is what they did again here. It’s a rematch from another recent title change so there was only so much interest, but that has been the chance for either Tag Team Titles for years now.

Actress Tiffany Haddish introduces the new National Champion Damian Priest, who doesn’t like bullies. He likes being the UNITED STATES Champion though.

Rick Boogs plays new Intercontinental Champion Rick Boogs to the ring, allowing Pat McAfee to dance on the announcers’ table.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the latter’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair beat her at Wrestlemania to win the title so Banks left (as she does) and then came back for a rematch. However, there were rumors that Banks wasn’t cleared to wrestle so things might be up in the air.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Banks isn’t cleared to compete (right) so we have a replacement.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair is….hang on a second.

BECKY LYNCH IS BACK beats the heck out of Carmella, meaning we have a replacement (again).

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Belair is defending and it’s a right hand into the Manhandle Slam to make Lynch champion at 25 seconds.

And for those you keeping track, had it been Banks vs. Belair, it would indeed be the same story for Belair at back to back Summerslams.

WWE is going back to Saudi Arabia and yes, it’s amazing, mainly because they’ve been well paid to say so.

Tamyra Mensah-Stock and Gable Steveson, Olympic gold medal winners in wrestling, are here for a nice presentation.

We get the same WWE Shop commercial for the third time in less than two hours.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Mahal cost Drew Money in the Bank so tonight it’s about revenge with Mahal’s goons barred from ringside. McIntyre drives him into the corner to start and hits a quick clothesline, followed by the toss suplex. A trip to the floor goes badly for Mahal as well, so McIntyre throws him back inside for some begging. Mahal brings up their previous friendship before getting in a superkick for two. The chinlock doesn’t do much to McIntyre so it’s the Glasgow Kiss into a series of overhead belly to belly suplexes. The Futureshock into the Claymore finishes Mahal at 4:36.

Rating: D+. Yeah what were you expecting here? Mahal has long since stopped meaning anything so having McIntyre beat him without much trouble was the only way to go. That’s what they did here and it was a fine way to go, albeit in a bad match. You can only get so much out of a match that is this one sided though and that’s what brought this down.

Post match Veer and Shanky come to the ring to go after McIntyre, who chases them off with the sword.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match, with new champion Nikki Ash defending against Charlotte and Rhea Ripley. Nikki cashed in Money in the Bank on Charlotte, who had been beaten down by Ripley. Tonight it’s time to crush Nikki once and for all, because she has been treated like a loser since she won the title in the first place, because A, Charlotte and B, it’s a really stupid gimmick.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Nikki Ash

Nikki is defending and, after some Big Match Intros, gets shoved down by Charlotte to start. The monkey flip takes Charlotte down and a rollup gets two on Ripley. Back up and Charlotte tosses Nikki out, leaving Ripley to shoulder Charlotte into the corner. Nikki comes back in so Charlotte can beat up both of them at once, including slamming Ash onto Ripley for the double stack.

The moonsault hits Ripley’s raised boot though, leaving Nikki to counter Riptide into a crossbody for two. Charlotte and Ripley mess up something so Charlotte hits a big boot for two of her own. Nikki is sent outside and another big boot sends Ripley outside. A tornado DDT drops Charlotte to give Nikki two but Ripley is back in to German suplex both of them at once.

Ripley’s missile dropkick gets two on Charlotte, leaving Ripley with the stunned kickout face. Charlotte and Ripley brawl to the floor for the slugout until Nikki dives onto both of them for no reaction. Back in and Ripley and Ash go for a double suplex on Charlotte, who counters into a double DDT, then knocks them both outside (because of course she does). Charlotte corkscrew moonsaults onto both of them, with Ash being driven HARD into the barricade.

Ripley finally gets in a big boot on Charlotte and Prism Traps Nikki, only to have Charlotte break it up again. The Prism Trap to Charlotte is countered into the Figure Eight but Nikki dives off the top for the save. Nikki hits the Reckoning for two on Charlotte with Ripley making a save this time. The Riptide is countered into a DDT to send Ripley outside and this isn’t looking good for Nikki. A high crossbody misses for Nikki and Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight to get the title back at 13:03.

Rating: C+. While it’s an entertaining match, this made me mad last year and it’s doing it again here. Nikki might as well have been a lamb led to the slaughter here, as Ripley looks like a killer and Charlotte looks like a star, while Nikki looks like a mascot of a low rent kids’ birthday party place. Throw in Charlotte being booked like a train here and then getting Nikki to tap in the end and this was ALL about Charlotte, as is far too often the case anytime she’s around. Nikki being called ALMOST A Superhero was bad enough, but then she’s just a meal for Charlotte, like so many others have been over the years.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Edge. Rollins cost Edge the universal Title against Roman Reigns last month, which is apparently tied to a moment in 2014, when the Shield teased attacking Edge and almost wiped him out. Now Edge knows that if Rollins hits the Curb Stomp, his career is probably over. I’m not sure how good of a feud it was, but Edge facing someone new is a fun thing to see.

Edge vs. Seth Rollins

I almost didn’t recognize Rollins without his Freakin. Edge comes out with a hybrid Brood/Metalingus theme for a pretty awesome moment. Feeling out process to start with Edge grabbing a headlock and then knocking Rollins to the floor for some frustration. Back in and Rollins forearms away but gets backdropped right back over the top for a crash. Edge sends him back inside and then outside again but this time Rollins drives him into the post.

A trip into the steps makes it worse and Rollins grabs a neckbreaker for two back inside. Rollins hits a Sling Blade but Edge is smart enough to go to the ropes before the Stomp can launch. Yet another neckbreaker is countered though and Edge grabs a flapjack for a breather. Rollins is able to knock him off the top, setting up a heck of a frog splash for two. Another Stomp attempt is avoided so they go up top at the same time, with Edge grabbing a super swinging neckbreaker (which would seem to hurt them both equally).

It’s Edge up first with a big boot and the Edgecution for two, leaving him a bit frustrated this time. The Edge-O-Matic is good for the same but Rollins suplexes him down. Another Stomp misses so Edge grabs a Glam Slam for two (nice touch). Edge has to avoid another Stomp and sends Rollins into the post, setting up a spear through the ropes and out to the floor for the crash.

Rollins is driven into the apron and the screen (because there’s a screen) is knocked out to give Edge two more. The spear is countered into the Pedigree (how Rollins beat Roman Reigns one day) for another near fall, meaning it’s Rollins being stunned this time. With nothing on the ground working, Rollins goes up top for the Phoenix splash, only to get speared down for another near fall.

With nothing else working, Rollins just hits him in the back of the neck, setting up a basement superkick to the back of the head. Rollins goes for the Stomp yet again but gets reversed into the Edgecator of all things, with Edge letting go to switch into the Crossface. Edge rams him face first into the mat and makes it a Crossface sleeper for the tap at 21:14.

Rating: B. They beat each other up for a long time until Edge got him in the end. The story here centered around the Stomp and it was a logical way to go given the buildup from that 2014 segment. That being said, going off a segment from seven years ago that wasn’t so interesting in the first place and it was a weird build to get there. Good match, but the road there could have been better.

Money In The Bank is in a football stadium next year. Gee that’s a quick turnaround for the same stadium but I’m sure nothing will go wrong.

Tonight’s attendance of 51,326 is officially announced.

Earlier tonight, John Morrison and Miz drove a water truck into the stadium.

Here are Miz and John Morrison for a chat. They’re ready to soak everyone….but Morrison has forgotten the Drip Stick 2000s. Miz doesn’t have them either, so here is Xavier Woods with the Drip Stick 2000 (a water cannon with a water tank attached). Woods is told he’s outnumbered but he does a survey (as part of his weird NWO tribute phase) and then sprays both of them down. And that’s it, as the crowd was SILENT during this.

We recap Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley for the WWE Title. Goldberg showed up as a challenger (as he tends to do) and the match was made, but then Lashley and MVP went after Goldberg’s son Gage (who looked like he would rather be having his teeth pulled out than be here) to make it personal. In other words, it’s a battle of the spears because WWE thinks that is the most amazing idea ever.

Raw World Title: Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. After the Big Match Intros, they go with the power off to start, with Goldberg hitting a flying shoulder and a World’s Strongest Slam. Back up and Lashley knocks him down with a hard shot of his own. Neither can hit a Jackhammer though so Lashley gets in some shots to the back of the neck. For some reason Lashley goes up top but gets slammed down, meaning MVP needs to offer a distraction.

That’s fine with Goldberg, who hits the spear on the floor to rock Lashley again. With nothing else working, MVP hits Goldberg in the knee with his cane, allowing Lashley to hit a chop block. A spinebuster puts Goldberg down again and he rolls outside for a rather out of character move. Lashley follows and drives the knee into the post twice in a row….which is enough for the referee stoppage at 7:12 as Goldberg can’t stand.

Rating: D+. Yeah it wasn’t awful, but at the same tome it is really hard to find any reason to be interested in Goldberg. All he does is come in, do some lame story, and then get a title match. That wasn’t the case here, and Lashley can only do so much. Nothing to see here, but at least Goldberg is done again for the time being.

Post match Lashley stays on Goldberg with a chair, but Goldberg’s son comes in to jump Lashley. That earns him a Hurt Lock, but MVP points out who it is and Lashley lets him go. Goldberg swears vengeance and covers his son as MVP says Lashley had no way of knowing who that was. BECAUSE THIS NEEDED A REMATCH!

We recap Roman Reigns vs. John Cena for the Universal Title. Reigns has been champion for about a year so now it’s Cena coming in for the dream match. Reigns talked about how Cena never changes (Reigns: “It’s like missionary position EVERY NIGHT!”) but Cena says Reigns has to change every few years because people stop caring. Cena also brought up that all it takes is three seconds to win the title, no matter what Reigns does to him. Oh and if Reigns loses, he’s leaving WWE, because WWE likes to take away any drama they might build up.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman, is defending. Cena comes out first and my goodness you can feel the star power dripping off of him like no one else that you ever see. As a great touch, the screen behind Cena’s entrance shows his sixteen World Titles, including the dates he won them. They take their time before eventually locking up for a standoff. Cena rolls him up for two and points it out to Reigns as the mind games are on.

That doesn’t work for Reigns, who knocks him down and then does it again to make it worse. A snap suplex gives Reigns two and we hit the chinlock. Cena gets tossed outside and there’s the big whip into the steps, allowing Reigns to pose again. Reigns can even stop to pose on the steps with the title but Cena gets in a quick rollup for two (in a great touch because it’s THAT CLOSE to the upset).

A quick AA attempt is countered into a DDT to give Reigns two, allowing him to apologize to movie executives for hurting Cena. Reigns cuts off a comeback attempt with a right hand and says this is easy. Another AA attempt is countered into a sleeper, with Cena powering up to drive him into the corner. Reigns still isn’t impressed, so Cena hits that big running clothesline of his for a needed breather.

Back up and Cena hits the running shoulders into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into a quickly broken guillotine though, leaving Reigns to hit a Superman Punch to take over again. The spear is cut off with a kick to the face and now the Shuffle connects. There’s the AA for two (with Cole freaking out on commentary to give away the kickout). The STF sends Reigns to the rope for the break so Cena follows him outside, earning himself an apron kick to the face.

Reigns gets a running start but charges into an AA through the announcers’ table for two back inside, leaving Cena frustrated. Cena goes up top but dives into a powerbomb for two and needs to pull himself up in the corner. The spear misses in the corner though and it’s the super AA for two, with the Reigns Leaves If He Loses stipulation being brought up for the first time all match. For some reason Cena tries his own spear but gets kicked in the face. They slug it out with Reigns hitting the Superman Punch into a spear to retain at 23:00.

Rating: B+. This wasn’t the best match in the world, but it was all about the big match atmosphere. That was hitting completely, as Cena knows how to bring the feeling like no one else these days. While it wasn’t likely that Cena was going to win, there was the feeling that it could happen and that’s good enough. Throw in Cena knowing how to do this match just well enough and it felt like a main event worth title match between two titans.

Post match Reigns poses but here is Brock Lesnar, making his first appearance in well over a year. Lesnar circles the ring and then stands on the steps before the staredown sends Reigns backing away. While the feud is tired, this would lead to a heck of a story as Paul Heyman was stuck between the two of them and even switched sides for a few weeks. Anyway, Lesnar poses as reigns and Heyman leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Most of the bigger matches clicked well, but there were enough things bringing the rest of the show down. The biggest thing though was the crowd actually being around, as it adds so much to the show. This was a rare situation where Summerslam was a way bigger show than Wrestlemania and the quality was good enough too. The bad parts are pretty bad but the stronger parts of the card carried it over. Solid show, but fast forward some of those weaker points.

Ratings Comparison

Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C
Redo: C

RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Eva Marie vs Alexa Bliss

Original: F
Redo: D-

Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Usos vs. Mysterios

Original: C-
Redo: C+

Becky Lynch vs. Bianca Belair

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Jinder Mahal vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: D+
Redo: D+

Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte vs. AJ Styles

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Seth Rollins vs. Edge

Original: B+
Redo: B

Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg

Original: D+
Redo: D+

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: C+
Redo: B-

Mostly the same here, though some of the bad stuff pulled the original down a bit.

Here is the original review if you’re interested:

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2017
Date: August 20, 2017
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,128
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s kind of amazing how these modern shows go in one ear and out the other. Aside from the main event, I couldn’t tell you a single thing on this show, and I can tell you every match (mostly in order) from the first seventeen or so Wrestlemanias. It’s the nature of the shows being built up so fast and then running so long, as the same is true of shows I’ve been to even this year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: The Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Rematch from Raw. Now this one I remember because it took place about twenty minutes into the two hour Kickoff Show and the place was embarrassingly empty with MAYBE twenty percent of the place full. It’s just awful looking as the fans who aren’t in yet (as in the majority of them) are going to be annoyed at missing a match and the wrestlers have to go out in front of this empty building like they’re on some nothing indy show (in a huge arena for some reason). I mean, what in the world is the point?

Matt headlocks Axel to start and it’s quickly off to Jeff as the dozens and dozens of fans get behind the good guys. Jordan comes in to crank on the arm to no reaction, at least partially because there aren’t many people here to cheer. A dropkick gets two on Dallas and Jordan muscles him down to the mat.

Everything breaks down and Jordan directs traffic as the Hardys chop away in the corner. Axel saves Dallas from the Swanton and we take a break. Back with Jeff getting two off a basement dropkick as the crowd is now just embarrassing instead of depressing. Dallas pushed Jeff off the top though and it’s time to start the stomping in the corner. Miz (oh yeah he’s in this match) comes in for a reverse chinlock but Jeff kicks him away without too much effort.

Instead it’s Axel coming in to twist Jeff’s neck around as the fans chant for BROTHER NERO. Jeff dropkicks Miz and Dallas off the apron and knocks Axel away as well, allowing the lukewarm tag off to Matt. The middle rope elbow to the back of the neck gets two on Miz but he’s right back up with the YES Kicks. Matt shrugs those off though and there’s a Side Effect for the same. Jordan comes in to throw Axel around, including a suplex for two. Everything breaks down and Miz makes a blind tag, setting up a Skull Crushing Finale to pin Jordan at 10:31.

Rating: C. The crowd killed what would have otherwise been a pretty good six man tag. When you can hear the wrestlers breathing, it’s pretty clear that there isn’t much going on in the arena, which isn’t exactly the atmosphere you want for a show billed as a big party. The match itself was fine, and it helps to not have watched it six days earlier.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Akira Tozawa vs. Neville

Tozawa, part of Titus Worldwide, is defending after winning the title from Neville on Monday. He also has a banged up shoulder. You remember Neville. He was the awesome guy who turned into one of the best heels in the company but WWE decided that having him put over Enzo Amore made more sense and since there was apparently no way Neville could be a heavyweight again, he walked out a few months later.

Neville shoulders him down to start and then dropkicks the glare off of Tozawa’s face. That’s it for now though as Neville sends him outside and screams a lot, as is his custom. The jumping backsplash crushes Neville back inside but he’s able to snap Tozawa’s throat across the top rope. Back from a break with Neville scoring off a missile dropkick to the back for two and stopping to sneer.

The chinlock lets Tozawa have a breather and he fights up to send Neville outside again. That means the big suicide dive and a Saito suplex but it’s too early for the top rope backsplash. Instead Tozawa reverses a fireman’s carry into an Octopus hold as he’s certainly keeping things varied. Neville makes the ropes so Tozawa hits a Shining Wizard for two.

An enziguri staggers Tozawa but he’s right back with a second Shining Wizard to put both guys down. Tozawa is up first but gets pulled down by the bad shoulder. His legs are fine enough to kick Neville in the head and it’s time to go up again. After knocking Neville off the top, the backsplash hits knees and the champ is in big trouble. Neville jumps up top and hits the Red Arrow to the back for the pin and the title at 11:45.

Rating: C+. I get what they were going for here with the title change taking place on Summerslam but why not go with the first title change here and then switch it back tomorrow or the next week on Raw? Or, dare I suggest it, on 205 Live? Other than that it felt like they were just kind of going through the motions at times, but Neville going through the motions is still pretty good.

The crowd is fine now.

Kickoff Show: Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. New Day

New Day is defending in what is kind of another Smackdown rematch, though it’s a different New Day lineup. Tonight it’s Woods and Big E., who has a huge cape. On the way to the ring, Kofi talks about how this is the place New Day first sang together and the original Francesca was born. Her sacrifice is what allowed us to have Francesca II: TURBO. Tonight they’re here to tear the house down with the Usos one more time.

Woods and Jimmy start things off in a technical sequence until Woods hits a roaring elbow to knock Jimmy’s block off. Some forearms in the corner have Jimmy in trouble but he gets in a shot to the face to stagger Woods. Back from a break with Jey putting on a chinlock and then slinging Woods into the corner. Woods knocks Jey off the top and avoids a charge from Jimmy. A missile dropkick has Jey in trouble but Jimmy pulls Big E. off the apron.

Thankfully the hot tag isn’t just a few seconds later and a backbreaker/middle rope knee combination gets two. Woods is in big trouble but scores with a victory roll faceplant (not a bad little move), which is finally enough for the hot tag to Big E. House is cleaned, including the release Rock Bottom out of the corner for two on Jey. Big E. powerbombs Woods onto Jey as the fast tags begin.

Woods even manages to electric chair Big E. so he can splash Jey as well but Jimmy comes in for a save. The double spinebuster gets two on Big E. and there’s the running Umaga attack for good measure as the pace picks up. Woods comes back in for a Rock Bottom into a Backstabber, which is somehow only good for two. That’s a heck of a finisher for those two if they’re ever a regular team.

Jey gets a blind tag but Woods knocks both Usos to the floor just in case. Big E.’s spear through the ropes is cut off by a superkick and a Superfly Splash while he’s still stuck in the ropes. The regular Superfly Splash gets a close two on Woods but he pulls Jey into a Koji Clutch. That’s broken up as well so Woods goes with a Shining Wizard for two.

A tornado DDT to the floor plants Jey and Jimmy takes the Midnight Hour, only to have Jey dive in at the last second for another save. Jimmy Samoan drops Woods to the floor and Kofi gets sent into the steps for checking on his buddy. Big E. is right back up with the spear through the ropes to take Jey down. Woods is done though and it’s four straight superkicks to Big E. into the double Us to give the Usos the titles back at 19:09.

Rating: B. Is there any surprise that this was the best thing on the Kickoff Show? This took some time to get going but these four delivered, as always. They know how to work well together and the diving saves for the false finishes were great. You could run these two over and over again, which is exactly what happened for the next few months. That can only go on for so long though, and that’s why the division isn’t great to this day.

The opening video starts with a shot of Brooklyn before heading backstage. The bigger matches get a quick look as someone spray paints the Summerslam logo onto a wall. That’s rather generic for the opening of such a big show.

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Corbin attacked Shinsuke Nakamura after Nakamura beat Cena, who made the save. Cena then cost Corbin his Money in the Bank cash-in to really hammer this home. The fans, ever so nice, ask Baron where his briefcase is. Cena slides outside to mock Corbin, even throwing on JBL’s hat. Well that makes any adult look like a moron so Corbin gives chase but Cena slides back in.

A headlock keeps Corbin on trouble as JBL points out the Cena issue with the crowd: they’re always chanting about him, whether it’s positive or negative. That’s not the best sign for the opponents, but at least Corbin had the chant to start the match. Some knees to the ribs put Cena in trouble and Corbin pops him in the jaw with a right hand.

The slide underneath the corner sets up the hard clothesline for two and Corbin is already looking frustrated. A suplex gets the same so it’s time to yell at the referee. Corbin hits a World’s Strongest Slam and we hit the chinlock. The fans ask about the briefcase again so Corbin says it’s on Cena. Another comeback starts up with the flying shoulders until Corbin slides under the ropes again, only to slide back in for a chokebreaker.

Cena blocks a superplex attempt and hits a tornado DDT, sending the fans right back into their chorus of booing. The AA is reversed into a Deep Six and Corbin can’t believe the kickout. He’s so serious that the shirt comes off and more slugging ensues. Cena sends him into the corner for the third slide but this time Corbin eats a big clothesline. The AA is good for the pin at 10:12.

Rating: D+. So that happened. The story wasn’t great, the action was nothing to see and Cena hit all of two moves to win in the end. Cena would go on to feud with Roman Reigns for the real rub, but that’s not the best way to boost Corbin. Just a complete nothing of a match here and it felt like they were getting it out of the way instead of featuring it, which is really weird to see for Cena.

Cena hugging kids and throwing his wristbands and dog tags is always cool to see. That just works.

Some wrestlers played Rocket League.

We recap Naomi vs. Natalya. Naomi won the title at Wrestlemania but Natalya thinks she’s turned it into a toy. Natalya attacked Becky Lynch after a match so Naomi made the save. This qualifies for the build to a title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Natalya vs. Naomi

Naomi is defending and gets slapped in the face at the bell but snaps off a hurricanrana to get herself out of trouble. A Blockbuster off the steps gives Naomi two more but Natalya posts her hard to take over. Back in and Natalya stomps away but the emotional offense has never been her strong suit. James Ellsworth and Miss Money in the Bank Carmella are watching in the back (she held that thing so long that she is still champion and Ellsworth has left, returned and left again in less than a year) as Natalya hits a running clothesline.

Naomi’s kicks to the legs don’t have much effect so Natalya grabs an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Natalya hits the discus lariat for two and loads up a superplex. Naomi slips out and hits a super Russian legsweep, which of course gets us to even despite both of them taking the same impact. A spinning kick to the head and a headscissors driver give Naomi two but the dancing kicks are shrugged off (as they should be) with Natalya dropkicking her in the face.

Natalya gets caught in the ropes though and a slingshot legdrop gives Naomi two. The reverse Rings of Saturn is countered into the Sharpshooter but Naomi pulls rolls through and sends Natalya head first into the buckle. Not that it matters though as the split legged moonsault misses, setting up another Sharpshooter to make Naomi tap at 10:50.

Rating: D+. I was bored during this as Natalya is a black hole of charisma and Naomi isn’t the best at being serious. The wrestling was dull too and there was nothing happening here to draw me in. It doesn’t help when the women’s division on both shows have been dominated by the Four Horsewomen for so long that it’s almost impossible to get invested in anyone else (though Naomi has come a long, long way in the last year).

Post match Naomi is rather depressed.

We recap Big Cass vs. Big Show. Cass and Enzo Amore have split up and Show is standing up for him. Tonight though Enzo is being locked in a cage (good start) and Show has a broken hand thanks to Cass crushing it in the shark cage.

Big Show vs. Big Cass

Before the match, Enzo makes various Brooklyn/New York City rap references. He talks about loving to talk and how his worst day is better than Cass’ best and Cass has no heart. Thankfully Cass comes out to cut off the never ending promo and Enzo goes up in the cage. Show, not being the brightest guy in the world, hits Cass with the broken hand as Enzo is already running his mouth. He dances in the cage a bit, shouting about having the best seat in the house.

Cass gets thrown around and kicked in the ribs and there’s the side slam, only to have Show bang up the hand again. Enzo shouts something about Patrick the Starfish as Show misses a Vader Bomb, injuring his hand again. Cass’ big boot is blocked by a weak KO punch for two but the second attempt hits Show’s chest. It’s time to start in on the hand even more, despite that not really doing anything that’s going to let Cass pin him. Something like an armbar has Enzo jumping up and down, further making me want to see him put inside a wood chipper.

The fans call the hold boring so Cass stops, poses, and puts it on again. Show throws him down and hits a left armed clothesline, followed by the chokeslam for two. The hand goes into the post as Enzo is leaning through the cage bars. With Show down, Enzo pulls off his pants and whips out a bottle of lubricant (there’s no way I’m touching that one), oils himself up, and gets out of the cage. The match completely stops until Enzo gets down so Cass can kick him in the face. A pair of big boots put Show down and the Empire Elbow is good for the pin at 10:29.

Rating: F+. What in the world was that supposed to be? This was all about the bad hand but somehow it became about Enzo, that loudmouthed idiot, and then Cass just wins clean. I have no idea how this was the best idea they had but it was an awful match and a big waste of time. If I ever see Enzo oiled up again, I’ll be off in the next room gouging my eyes out.

General Manager Kurt Angle and Daniel Bryan get in a YES/NO off about which show will be better for the rest of the night.

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Rusev jumps him from behind before the bell and Orton is in trouble. They get inside for the bell and it’s the RKO in ten seconds. That would be your “well the card is huge and we have to cut something” match of the night.

Bayley wishes Sasha Banks good luck tonight. Banks is taking her place due to a shoulder injury.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss

Banks is challenging and has special gear that makes her look like a peacock (so she’s copying Charlotte tonight). Bliss gets fired up to start and slugs away in the corner but Banks flips her around and hammers at the champ’s head. One heck of a forearm drops Banks and Bliss talks some trash. With the forearms boring her, Bliss pulls Banks’ hair around the ropes and crotches her on the middle rope for painful measure. We hit the chinlock as it’s almost all Bliss in the early going.

A lot more trash talk sets up a choke shove to put Banks down again as the fans are trying to get behind Banks. The middle rope knees into the moonsault knees give Bliss two more and she drops Banks on the back of her head for the same. Bliss goes to the middle rope and chokes some more until Banks slams her down. A dropkick and clothesline put the champ down for two but she knees Banks in the face to take over again. Bliss’ Code Red out of the corner is countered into something like an Alabama Slam, followed by just kneeing the heck out of Bliss in the corner.

The Bank Statement doesn’t work as Bliss is right next to the ropes. Bliss pulls her down into the ring skirt and dumps Banks to the floor for a near countout, with Bliss freaking out when she gets back in. Twisted Bliss only gets two more and now Bliss doesn’t know what to do. Since hitting it again is out of the question, Bliss picks her up and gets pulled down into the Bank Statement. Banks’ shoulder gives out so she tries the hold again and Bliss taps at 13:17.

Rating: C. Nothing much to see here with Banks shrugging off everything Bliss threw at her and winning without a ton of drama. Bliss got to show off the offense here and looked very good, though there’s not much she can do when Banks is on offense for all of a minute and a half and wins completely clean. Banks would lose the title just eight days later, continuing her trend of not being able to remain champion for very long.

Video on wrestlers auditioning to be the new Colonel Sanders. A fight breaks out and Shawn Michaels winds up winning in one of the most random, bizarre things you’ll ever see. Becky Lynch as the Colonel oddly works.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt. Bray had targeted Balor as his latest false idol, beat him on Raw, and covered him in fake blood. Balor then decided to bring the Demon back to fight as hard as he could. This worked in NXT but not up here and that was mainly for one reason: Cole explaining/hyping the Demon EVERY TWO FREAKING SECONDS, saying over and over that “the Demon is Finn Balor’s alter ego” because WWE doesn’t think its fans are that bright. I don’t think NXT ever actually explained it (if they did it was once) because they know how smart fans can be. And that’s why the Demon has never been back.

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt

Cole mentions the Demon idea again during Bray’s entrance but gets cut off as He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands starts playing for Finn. We get the big smoky entrance with Finn looking awesome and the camera getting an AWESOME shot of him with his back to the ring and the crowd posing with him. Balor gets to the ring and LET’S HIT THAT EXPLANATION again. Seriously it’s not exactly a character that needs to be broken down and it’s made worse when Cole does it.

Wyatt is hesitant to start and a right hand just ticks Balor off. Balor shows him how to throw some real right hands and Wyatt needs a breather on the floor. You don’t do that to Balor, who charges around the corner to drop Wyatt again. Back in and Balor isn’t phased by the upside down stare so Wyatt bails to the floor. This time it’s a big flip dive as it’s all Balor so far. Bray finally pulls him off the apron and hammers away, followed by something like a reverse Stunner out of the corner.

Of course that means a chinlock, because even though Bray is a cult leader, he still follows WWE wrestling tropes. Balor is right back up with a Pele kick and a baseball slide to the floor. The double stomp from the apron to Bray’s back keeps him in trouble, causing Graves to drop a (failed) external occipital protuberance reference. I knew I liked him for a reason.

Bray kicks him in the face and hits the release Rock Bottom for two. The running backsplash gets the same but Finn kicks him to the floor for the shotgun dropkick against the barricade. Back in and Bray scores with a kick so it’s spider walk time. Balor pops to his feet, hits a Sling Blade, another shotgun dropkick, and the Coup de Grace for the pin at 10:39.

Rating: D. This was as exciting as Bray hitting some basic offense while Balor did all of his usual stuff. The problem again is in the Demon, which was what Balor would bring out for his biggest, most violent fights. When it’s just the standard wrestling match and even a pretty dominant Finn performance, the whole Demon character is pretty much a waste.

Ad for the Mae Young Classic. In other words, the modern NXT women’s division.

We recap Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose vs. the Bar, which is built around the idea of Dean and Seth not being able to trust each other. They kept offering the Shield fist until they FINALLY got back together, mainly due to having to deal with the Bar. Now they’re united after a very well done series of segments that them saving each other but not being willing to trust each other. They got in a fight though and the Bar coming out to join in was FINALLY enough to get them to agree to fight together. This was actually a heck of a build and I got sucked into it, both live and again during the recap video.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending and it’s Sheamus getting taken down so the challengers can drop some elbows. Rollins Downward Spirals Cesaro into Dean’s boot and the champs are cleared out early on. A quick distraction lets Sheamus Brogue Kick Dean so Seth tries a suicide dive onto both guys. That gets him slammed down hard as momentum changes in a hurry.

We settle down to Cesaro gutwrench suplexing Seth and the chinlock goes on. Rollins fights back and hits a Blockbuster but Ambrose is still down off what is apparently the most devastating Brogue Kick of all time. Sheamus keeps Rollins in the corner as Cesaro runs into the crowd and destroys a beach ball, because Cesaro is more awesome than you. An enziguri gets Rollins out of trouble but this time it’s Cesaro cutting him off. Seth sends him outside though and Cesaro comes up holding his knee.

Rollins goes out after him with Sheamus following, meaning it’s Dean diving onto everyone at once. Back in and Rollins rolls underneath Cesaro and makes the hot tag to bring in Ambrose. Everything breaks down and Seth springboards in with a clothesline to Sheamus. There’s the double suicide dive and the fans are eating up all these double team spots. We settle down again with Ambrose powering out of the Neutralizer and hitting the rebound lariat, only to have Sheamus cut off the tag.

Ambrose catches him on top with a superplex into a very fast frog splash from Rollins but Cesaro makes the save. Rollins and Ambrose are tired of this tagging stuff and unload on Sheamus in the corner but he’s right back with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Cesaro swings Dean for all of two rotations and the Sharpshooter goes on, with Dean looking more surprised than in pain. With Dean getting close to the rope, Cesaro rolls over into a Crossface to change focal points.

Instead of going for the submission, Cesaro loads up a powerbomb with Sheamus adding a top rope clothesline for another close two. Rollins finally comes in and gets knocked outside just as fast. Dean tells the champs to bring it so they load up a spike White Noise. Hang on though as Rollins is right in there with a hurricanrana to send Cesaro into Dean and Sheamus for the save. The wind up knee into Dirty Deeds finishes Sheamus for the titles at 18:38.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but there was no other way to go with the finish. Rollins and Ambrose are a great team and the fans love them so let them have a long match and take the titles for a change. There was some chemistry here and that made for a good, long match that the show desperately needed.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens. They’ve traded the US Title for a few months now and Owens is claiming a conspiracy thanks to the referee missing his shoulder being up in the most recent title match. Therefore, Shane McMahon is guest referee tonight, despite having a history with AJ and a history of being a crooked referee.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

AJ is defending with Shane as guest referee. They get in a fight before the bell with Shane pulling them apart twice in a row, because Shane is going to be the focal point here. The bell rings and they fight out to the floor with AJ hitting a knee from the apron. Back in and AJ keeps him down, followed by a knee drop. One heck of a clothesline takes AJ’s head off and the Cannonball gets two.

The backsplash gets the same and the near fall off the Edge-O-Matic has Owens yelling at Shane. AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant and the fireman’s carry into a backbreaker gives him two of his own. They’re both banged up and the delay allows Owens to “accidentally” shove Shane into the ropes to crotch AJ on top. He’s fine enough for a springboard 450, which hits Shane after Owens pulls him in. For reasons of storyline convenience, AJ is down after splashing Shane, allowing Owens to hit the Pop Up Powerbomb for two, thanks to a delayed count.

That means ANOTHER argument with Shane, allowing AJ to grab the Calf Crusher but Owens pokes him in the eye. Owens sends AJ into Shane to knock him to the floor, meaning there’s no referee to see Owens tap to another Calf Crusher. Now it’s AJ’s turn to yell at Shane, who shoves AJ into a rollup for a pretty fast two. The annoyed AJ puts him on top, only to get caught in the swinging superplex for the big crash.

Owens wins a slugout but gets reversed into a Styles Clash for a clean two. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets three, though with AJ’s foot on the ropes at one. Shane: “TWO!” That means another argument with Shane, who shoves Owens into a rollup for two, meaning they’re not repeating spots from earlier in the match. The Phenomenal Forearm into the Styles Clash retains AJ’s title at 17:23.

Rating: B-. Well of course most of the match was about Shane, because that’s what a Summerslam title match should be about. The wrestling was fine but you kept waiting on Shane to do something else. I’m not sure how this was the best they could do with Styles, but at least there’s an Owens vs. Shane story set up for the next eight months. That’s more important than the US Title and Summerslam right?

Video on some fans winning a sweepstakes and got to go to the show.

We recap Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal and I can feel the headache coming. Mahal won the WWE Championship in a period of Vince McMahon insanity and has held it since May. Nakamura has hit Kinshasa on a bunch of people, including Cena to become #1 contender. In other words: help us Shinsuke Nakamura. You’re our only hope.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Nakamura is challenging and a live violinist plays him to the ring. The fans singing the song is awesome as usual, especially when you consider it doesn’t have words. Jinder grabs a wristlock to start so Nakamura spins around into a headlock, much to the crowd’s delight. Nakamura puts him up against the ropes for the arm shaking and the required COME ON. Mahal bails to the floor so it’s a triple COME ON, including the Singh Brothers. The fans chant for 3MB because the comedy version of Mahal is better than the main event version.

With nothing else going on, let’s go to the Japanese commentary team. I don’t speak Japanese so it’s all Greek to me. Back in and Nakamura drops a knee and hits some Good Vibrations as Mahal has nothing. As in all together, not just so far. The Singh Brothers offer a distraction though and Mahal knocks him off the apron to take over for the first time. Some knee drops set up a chinlock, followed by Mahal doing the COME ON pose but shouting his own name.

After that brilliant display of saying his name, it’s back to the chinlock. Nakamura fights up with a kick to the face and some YES Kicks to set up the running knee to the ribs. With the covers not working, Nakamura grabs a triangle choke but Mahal gets his foot in the ropes. Nakamura’s running knee in the corner hits buckle and Mahal adds a jumping knee to the face for two of his own. Mahal goes shoulder first into the post but the Singh Brothers’ distraction lets Mahal hit a chinlock slam (he has ONE MOVE and can’t even do that right) to retain at 11:25.

Rating: D-. You know, it’s been about nine months since Mahal lost the title and e-freaking-gads I had forgotten how awful his title reign really was. This felt like a bad house show main event and it’s the biggest Smackdown match on the second biggest show of the year. You can feel the fans dying out there when Mahal is….well doing anything actually, but in this case I’ll go with being on offense and winning. I remember watching Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura beat the living tar out of each other for twenty minutes at Takeover: Dallas. Now though, a weak/botched/terrible cobra clutch slam puts him down? Not a chance.

We recap the Universal Title match with Brock Lesnar defending against Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and Samoa Joe. Lesnar was announced as facing all three challengers and since he wasn’t happy, he’s threatened to leave WWE if he loses. The three challengers all say they can be the man to take out Lesnar. There’s just not much else to be said here but this is by far and away the main event.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman vs. Samoa Joe

Lesnar is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Cole picks Reigns to win because Reigns beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Cole: “How can you bet against that?” You pick the guy who did it first, you nitwit. Reigns is of course booed out of the building because….oh you know the drill by now.

The brawl is on to start (well duh) with Strowman throwing Reigns to the floor and Brock hitting a belly to belly on Joe. Strowman gets posted and it’s time for the Reigns vs. Lesnar showdown that no one but WWE seems to love. Booker tries to say that Lesnar knew nothing but winning in UFC, which I’ll leave you to make fun of. Some suplexes put Reigns on the floor and it’s Strowman time.

Now THIS gets the fans’ attention but Reigns and Joe are right back in to break up the fun. That lasts all of five seconds before it’s back to Strowman vs. Lesnar, meaning another YES chant. Strowman LAUNCHES Brock into the corner and hits a heck of a clothesline to put the champ on the floor. As usual, Lesnar’s selling is very underrated. Everyone is on the floor now and Joe chokes Lesnar but sidesteps a Reigns spear, sending Lesnar through the barricade. That spot will always look cool.

Strowman is back up and loads up the title (with Graves hoping he uses Saxton as a weapon), setting up a running powerslam to drive a kicking Lesnar through it. The fans REALLY like that but here’s Reigns to kick Strowman in the face and kill their buzz all over again. Joe is back up with a suicide elbow to take Reigns out, meaning the fans are won right back. Thankfully Cole is doing a great job of explaining how cool it is to see people this big doing this stuff.

That’s exactly what he should be doing and it’s working here. Strowman throws an announcers’ chair at Joe and Reigns in a cool spot, followed by a second powerslam through a table to put Lesnar down again. Heyman has a look on his face that says “well, I didn’t see that one coming”. Fans: “ONE MORE TABLE!” Greedy twits. To mix things up a bit, Strowman picks that one up and turns it on top of the already out Lesnar. Half a dozen people come out to get the table off of Lesnar and a stretcher is brought out as Heyman seems to be near tears.

We’re not done yet though as Strowman hits Joe and Reigns in the head with the steps. With the steps in the ring, Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines and hits a good steps shot into Strowman’s shoulder. Joe’s rollup gets two on Reigns but he’s right back up with a Samoan drop for two. The Superman Punch is countered into the Koquina Clutch but Strowman (with some blood next to his ear) is back in with a double chokeslam. Everyone is down so here comes Lesnar again.

Strowman is the only one on his feet so it’s time for the big showdown. A running clothesline takes Strowman to the floor and there’s a German suplex each to Joe and Reigns. Strowman comes back in and elbow his way out of a German suplex, only to get caught in the Kimura. That’s broken up with a Superman Punch, with Joe and Lesnar taking one each as well. Reigns spears Lesnar for two so here’s Strowman for a dropkick to Reigns, just because he can do that too.

The powerslam gets two on Joe with Lesnar pulling the referee out at the last second. A Superman Punch gets two on Strowman, whose kickout puts Reigns on his feet. There’s a powerslam to Reigns with Lesnar making the save but getting loaded up into the F5. That’s broken up by a Reigns spear, drawing Joe back in for a Clutch on Lesnar. Brock reverses into the F5 but Reigns is right in there with some Superman Punches. Three in a row put Lesnar down but the spear is countered into the F5 to retain Brock’s title at 20:53.

Rating: A-. What a fight and that’s all it needed to be. They were making Godzilla/King Kong references here and they nailed the idea to near perfection. The best thing here was Strowman looking awesome and like the man that could beat Lesnar if he had the chance, with the bonus of Reigns taking the fall again. It’s not like Reigns losing was going to hurt him (it hasn’t yet) so going this was was the right call. This was all about violence and that was the story: big, strong people beating each other up for twenty minutes and all of the chaos that it caused. Well done, all around.

Lesnar can barely stand to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show suffered from the same problem as the modern Wrestlemania. It’s not the length that is the problem (the show never really did drag) but rather that almost nothing has a chance to sink in. Everything jumped from one match to the other and most of the matches didn’t have a ton of time.

It was “well that happened so let’s move on” time after time and that doesn’t make for a special show. The show isn’t terrible but aside from the main event, nothing on here felt important and that’s not what Summerslam needs to be. In other words: cut some stuff out and let it breathe, which might as well be the standard operating criticism around here.

Ratings Comparison

Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Original: C-
Redo: C

Neville vs. Akira Tozawa

Original: C

Redo: C+

New Day vs. Usos

Original: B+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Original: D

Redo: D+

Naomi vs. Natalya

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Big Cass vs. Big Show

Original: D

Redo: F+

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B-

Redo: C

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

Redo: D

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs. The Bar

Original: B

Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe vs. Braun Strowman

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: C-

Time has NOT been kind to this show and aside from two (or maybe three) matches, it’s not worth seeing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/08/20/summerslam-2017-the-star-of-stars/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,974
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

A year has passed since I saw this show and I can barely remember much about it. That’s very telling when you look at how stacked this show really is. There are multiple top level matches here and it really wasn’t clear what was going to close the show until the night of the event. Hopefully that means that this SIX HOUR show holds up. Let’s get to it.

So here’s a quick plug. I’m going through the pre-show and there’s a three expert panel of Booker T., Jerry Lawler and Lita. Earlier this year, I met all three of them at WrestleCon. If you’re ever at a Wrestlemania weekend, treat yourself to an amazing time and GO TO WRESTLECON. I met over 120 wrestlers in about four hours. Where else are you going to get to do something like that? Anyway, on with the show.

Pre-Show: American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Who would have thought that Breezango would be the most entertaining out of all these teams? This is pretty much the still titleless Smackdown tag division at this point as they had to bring in the Headbangers and throw together Heath Slater and Rhyno to be able to have a tournament. This is also a rematch from Smackdown, which shows how little effort they were putting into the tag division at this point.

Gable and Breeze start things and the fans are WAY into Gable. Chad twists around as only he can to escape a wristlock and it’s off to Jey, who is quickly driven into the corner. English comes in and says that he’s what a man is. That earns him a right hand to the jaw and it’s off to Mojo to work on a wristlock. Ryder comes in to quite the reaction as Mauro says the Hype Bros have more chemistry than the Periodic Table.

Everything breaks down (What took them so long?) and Ascension clears the ring, only to have American Alpha come off the top (the same corner) with double clotheslines (that’s pure Steiner Brothers). English posts Ryder though and we take a break. Back with Gotch putting Ryder in a chinlock, followed by Viktor doing the same. The other heels take turns stomping on Ryder until Breeze grabs his own chinlock. Fandango adds a slingshot legdrop as this is going WAY longer than it needs to.

JBL thinks cold beer uniting the APA is more effective than furry selfie sticks uniting Breezango but maybe he’s wrong. Ascension knocks the good guys off the apron but Viktor misses a charge in the corner, allowing Ryder to get in a neckbreaker on Konnor. The hot tag (with a limited reaction) brings in Jimmy to clean house.

Jordan gets the real hot tag and does his fired up sequence (which he really is awesome at) with a belly to belly getting two on Breeze. We hit the parade of secondary finishers as the referee is imploring them to tag. Mojo powerbombs Breeze and Viktor out of the corner and the Usos add stereo superkicks to set up stereo dives. Back in and Grand Amplitude plants Gotch, only to have Jey tag himself in for a Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:31. Gable is really not cool with that. Eh just wait until your team is split up for a pretty lame story where Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a few minutes from this, it’s a heck of an opener. There are too many people in the match of course but they kept it moving fast enough (for the most part) to really get something fun out of it. Jordan’s house cleaning spot is a heck of a way to fire the crowd up and it made the match more fun than it should have been. Tweak this a bit (eight/ten man tag or shorten the match a bit) and it’s even better.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Sami works on D-Von’s arm to start and it’s off to Neville for more of the same. Both of them get in more shots as we hear about the rivalry over the NXT Title. I do appreciate the history, especially when Graves should know about that match very well. Bubba is sent outside but D-Von breaks up a springboard dive, allowing Bubba to nail Neville from behind to take over. The fans want tables but a back elbow to Neville’s jaw cuts them off in a hurry.

Back from a break with Bubba hitting his neckbreaker out of the corner. Things slow down even more as Bubba is talking even more than he usually does in a match. Bubba: “COME ON ENGLISH BOY! O-LAY! O-LAY!” The middle rope backsplash misses though and the hot tag brings in Sami. D-Von takes the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but the reverse 3D gets the same. Neville escapes the regular version though and we get some heel miscommunication. The Helluva Kick sets up the Red Arrow to put Bubba away at 7:55.

Rating: C-. That would be it for the Dudleys in WWE as they would have one more segment tomorrow night where Anderson and Gallows sent them packing. It’s also pretty much it for Sami and Neville as a team, which is quite odd as you would think they would be a fine choice for a team. The match was nothing you wouldn’t expect on Raw.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

You know, because two matches just weren’t enough for the pre-show. This is the first match of the Best of Seven Series, which really wasn’t too well received. After Cole says Cesaro is facing Cesaro and both Cole and Saxton say this is about establishing physical dominance, we’re ready to go. Sheamus misses a very early Brogue Kick but the spinning springboard uppercut is blocked as well.

Cesaro charges into an uppercut but comes back with a dropkick for one. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up so Sheamus clotheslines him onto the apron instead. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s chronically taped up shoulder but Cesaro lifts him up into that kind of reverse Angle Slam of his. They’re certainly hitting each other hard here, which is pretty much the draw of the whole feud.

Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and it’s off to a break. Back with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock because that rule even applies on pre-shows that will never end. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two as Cole runs down the pay per view card, which only makes me think that there are FAR too many titles in WWE. They fight over a suplex and fall out to the floor in a heap. Back in and Cesaro starts firing off the running uppercuts in the corner, capped off by a dropkick to knock him off the ropes.

The apron superplex (which wasn’t from the apron) gets two but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for two. There’s the super Regal Roll for two more and frustration is really setting in. Another Brogue Kick attempt is countered by one heck of a clothesline though and Cesaro adds a high crossbody for two of his own. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter but Sheamus gets to the ropes. Back up and a poke to the eye sets up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 14:11.

Rating: B. They beat the heck out of each other and it was a fun match but it also brings up the problem: I’m not going to want to watch them fight six more times. No matter how good things are, having them happen so many times in a row over several weeks is going to get tiresome. It happens in all these series and it’s happening here too.

And now, after more wrestling than you get on an average Smackdown, here’s the actual pay per view.

The opening video looks at New York City, with the narrator telling you how AMAZING the city is. I’m not sure if New York City or Texas is worse about bragging about their home’s greatness. As usual, this switches over to a series of quick looks at the biggest matches on the card.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Well duh. That’s about as easy of a choice for an opener as you could ever find for this show. As you might expect, the crowd eats up the opening promo with a spoon and of course we hear a ton of New York City music references. Included are Frank Sinatra, Biggie Smalls and Jay-Z, plus more that probably go over my head. Cass adds in a few songs of his own as this is the only way this show could have opened. Since Graves is the best heel commentator in wrestling today though, he points out that Enzo is from New Jersey.

Jericho and Owens jump Enzo at the bell and the STUPID IDIOT chants start rolling. Enzo comes back with a crossbody and a running right hand to the jaw for two. It’s off to Cass, who drags Owens inside for a beal. That’s some scary power. Enzo gets launched into the corner to crush Jericho but the Canadians bail to the floor. That’s fine with Cass who tosses Enzo over the top onto them in a huge crash. I’ve always loved that spot as it just looks cool.

Back in and Enzo ax handles Owens but turns into a middle rope dropkick from Jericho. The Canadian violence begins with Owens kneeing Enzo from the apron and doing his dance on the apron in a rather funny visual. Owens’ comedic skills aren’t given enough credit more often than not. It’s back to Jericho for the Arrogant Cover and a chinlock with Owens telling Jericho to do it like he taught him.

Owens comes in and adds a gutbuster for two, followed by the running start for a chinlock. It takes real talent to turn a chinlock into an art form but Owens has somehow pulled it off. Enzo finally rolls away but Jericho is there to break up the diving tag attempt. Owens drops the frog splash for two and his stunned looked on the kickout is the usual awesome visual. Enzo gets pulled off the corner to make things even worse but, after blowing a kiss to Jericho, misses the Cannonball.

That means the hot tag to Cass and everything breaks down. Jericho dives into a big boot but Owens breaks up the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka. Cass gets posted on the floor and now the Cannonball against the barricade connects. Back in and Enzo scores with his top rope DDT on Jericho with Owens making the save. A pop up Codebreaker (didn’t look great as Jericho was too far away) ends Enzo at 12:09.

Rating: C+. Odd choice for an ending aside (not surprising of course but odd), this was a good way to get the crowd going. I could have gone for another hope spot from Enzo and more of Cass cleaning house but that pop up Codebreaker could have been a heck of a finisher if done right. Nice opener, though would it have killed them to put Enzo and Cass over in Brooklyn?

Smackdown bosses Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon run into Raw General Manager Mick Foley to brag about how awesome their shows are. Former Daily Show host Jon Stewart and his son come in to ask what Foley is thinking to work with Stephanie. He rants about abuse of power but realizes she’s right behind him. Stephanie yells at him about how great it is to abuse power but thankfully New Day comes up. As the Smackdown bosses and Foley much on cereal, New Day asks Jon if he’d like to do something. He gets out as fast as he can and Stephanie isn’t amused.

We recap Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Sasha won the Women’s Title on the first exclusive show after the Brand Split and tonight is the rematch. The other big idea here is Charlotte never loses singles matches on pay per view and Banks has to recreate the magic one more time.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Banks is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Some early WOOing sets up a slightly less early Bank Statement but Charlotte bails to the floor. Back in and Banks climbs the corner for a wristdrag before sending Charlotte face first into the middle buckle. Banks gets caught on top though and Charlotte basically drops her onto the ropes for a backbreaker which almost had to hurt horribly. The fact that Banks had a bad back coming in and Charlotte still did some rather sloppy moves like that got her in some hot water.

We hit a Gory Stretch on the champ for a bit but she comes back with a pair of running clotheslines. That just earns her another backbreaker and Charlotte stomps away at the back. The Figure Eight is broken up but Sasha misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Charlotte picks her up for a super Razor’s Edge but since that would, you know, kill Sasha, she reverses into a hurricanrana to put them both down.

Back up and a WOO earns Charlotte a string of slaps before Sasha avoids a charge in the corner and hits the double knees to the back for two. Charlotte kicks her in the leg to break up a charge but gets knocked outside again, setting up the double knees from the apron. Back in and the Backstabber doesn’t work but Natural Selection is countered into the Bank Statement (thankfully too as the Natural Selection clearly didn’t send Sasha’s head anywhere near the mat).

Charlotte makes the rope for the break and takes out the knee again. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two so she yells about being better than Sasha. Another Bank Statement goes on but Charlotte reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 13:52. Saxton: “Just like that?”

Rating: B. This was just a straight match and that’s the key to the whole thing. The women are getting to show that they can have a good match without the smoke and mirrors, which never would have been the case otherwise. If nothing else it got the kind of time that a title match deserves to develop the story of Banks having a bad back (which would keep her on the shelf for about a month). Strong match here and another of many to come for these two.

Doctors Anderson and Gallows (oh man I had forgotten how stupid this was) run into AJ Styles for a Club reunion. Finn Balor comes up and doesn’t think much of it. Somehow, this has still never gone anywhere.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending after winning a triple threat match. Miz comes out wearing a glittery Phantom of the Opera mask while Maryse is basically in a one piece swimsuit. In a sign of the changing times, Mauro talks about Miz’s look instead of Maryse. Miz stomps away in the corner and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Crews gets the same off a rollup, only to walk into the short DDT as it’s almost all Miz to start. We’re already in the reverse chinlock before Miz sends him into the apron to cut off a comeback. Miz takes too long coming off the top though and dives into a dropkick to put both guys down.

A crossbody into a nipup has Miz in trouble as JBL rants about Otunga calling Crews a Jackrobat (jacked acrobat). The Toss Powerbomb is countered so Crews gets two off a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. An overhead belly to belly sets up a standing moonsault, which Otunga sums up perfectly: “A man with that kind of size and that kind of muscle should not be able to do that.” Miz teases taking a walk but Maryse cuts him off, allowing Miz to post Crews. The Skull Crushing Finale retains the title at 5:36.

Rating: D+. Standard Smackdown match and something that could have been cut, or at least put in the Kickoff Show in the place of the Dudleys match. Crews felt like an easy obstacle to overcome because there was nowhere near enough build to set the match up. Put some more effort into the title already people, as it’s just not working.

We recap John Cena vs. AJ Styles. They set up the first match when Styles and Cena were in the ring together, only to have Anderson and Gallows interfere to turn Styles heel. Styles went on a great rant about how Cena was a fraud who couldn’t hang in the ring with someone like him. Cena went into a great speech about how he’s here out of love because it never gets old. AJ beat him at Money in the Bank with assistance from Anderson and Gallows, setting up a rematch between the two here.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This just feels big. AJ grabs a waistlock to start but is easily knocked away. The announcers go out of the way to put over how AJ has been on big shows before but nothing this big. Oh I don’t know. I remember him being at that Wrestlemania thing earlier in the year. The dueling chants begin and the AJ STYLES side is pretty clearly stronger.

Cena’s headlock is countered and AJ scores with the dropkick but the bragging earns AJ a right to the jaw. A hard whip into the corner sends AJ down for a bit with Cena doing some rare trash talking. They head to the floor and the fans start belting out JOHN CENA SUCKS, only to have AJ turn it into some gasping with a suplex onto the apron. Cena is right back with a dropkick for two and it’s time for some more right hands to the head.

AJ comes back with a forearm to the face, earning himself Cena’s finishing sequence. It’s way too early for the AA though as AJ hits a Pele, followed by the Styles Clash for a close two. The fans were actually more into the near fall than I was expecting as you would think they’d know better this early. The AA gives Cena two of his own and both guys are down again.

Styles slips out of the super AA and grabs the torture rack for the spinout powerbomb. They’re trading bombs at this point and it’s the only way they should be going here. Something like a Big Ending gives Cena two but he can’t get the STF. Instead it’s the AA neckbreaker for two on Cena (not the same as the AA JBL) but the springboard 450 only hits mat.

A faceplant puts Cena down again though and AJ can’t follow up. He manages the springboard forearm but Cena reverses into the worst STF I’ve ever seen. Thankfully AJ slips out and grabs a Crossface, which Cena powers out of as well. That’s reversed into the Calf Crusher which AJ is smart enough to twist away from the ropes. Cena reverses that into another horrible STF (AJ’s face is on the mat) so AJ is quickly up with the enziguri. A tornado DDT plants AJ and there’s the top rope Fameasser for two.

Cena heads up again and gets taken down with a super hurricanrana (Mauro: “MAMA MIA!”), followed by the Phenomenal Forearm for a VERY near fall (drawing Mauro to his feet). It’s Cena’s turn now as he takes AJ up for the super AA and….it’s two. NOW the fans know it’s on as I don’t think anyone has ever kicked out of that before. Cena is stunned and the AA is countered into another Clash. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Cena away clean at 23:10.

Rating: A. I know it’s not going to sound good but a lot of this goes to Cena. At the end of the day, the crowd completely lost it when AJ kicked out of that super AA. AJ wins here not because he got a pin but because he beat Cena clean. That’s a very, VERY short list and that’s what makes it feel so important. Think back to how big of a deal it was when Warrior pinned Hogan clean. That felt like an era changing win, and while this isn’t quite that big, it’s the same idea.

Oh yeah and it’s an outstanding match and possibly the Match of the Year. This was the heavyweight slugfest formula as they beat the heck out of each other with both guys hitting everything they could until one of them couldn’t get up. That’s a really hard match to pull off and these two did it in an incredible match. It belonged on the grand stage and gives Cena one heck of a mountain to overcome, which he somehow did in a better match at the Royal Rumble.

Post match Cena takes off his wristband and leaves it in the ring. He would do dark matches for a few weeks and then be back wrestling on TV in less than a month so this didn’t mean anything.

Some fans won a contest and got some stuff. In other words, let the fans have a breather.

Here’s Jon Stewart for your celebrity appearance. He makes fun of himself for interfering in Cena’s match last year and says the big lesson he learned was to tuck your shirt in when you’re taking an AA. As for tonight though, he’s here to be in New Day’s corner to help deal with Anderson and Gallows. In honor of the moment, he throws on a unicorn horn and does Big E.’s (out injured due to getting crotched against the post) entrance.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course and unfortunately Anderson and Gallows are still doing their stupid doctor nonsense, complete with jars for Kofi, Xavier and Jon’s testicles. I hear Paige can help you with one of those. Anderson headlocks Kofi down to start but he’s right back up with the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Kofi flips onto his feet and gets two off the standing double stomp. You can tell the fans are still recovering from the previous match and it’s off to Woods.

That goes badly as the he gets taken into the corner for a beating from Gallows. At least it does bring the fans back a bit with the rhythmic clapping. Gallows gets taken into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede (which they’ve kind of stopped doing in recent months) and the fans are really not responding. Woods sends him outside so Kofi can hit a running dive (while posing in the air) to take him down again. Back in and Gallows kicks Kofi in the head to take over for real this time with Anderson working on the arm.

That goes nowhere as the hot tag brings in Woods to clean house. Anderson sends him to the apron for an enziguri, setting up the rope walk elbow drop. Everything breaks down and Anderson kicks Kofi in the chest, setting up the Magic Killer. Stewart gets in though and it’s time to crotch him as well. Hang on though as he has to tuck in his shirt first. Cue the returning Big E. for the save though and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D. I don’t know if it was the previous match or what but sweet goodness the fans did NOT care for this one. It’s not a good match in the first place as Anderson and Gallows aren’t funny in the doctor roles, but the bigger problem here was the focus being on Stewart at the end. Oh and the ending sets up a rematch, which really isn’t what they need to be going with here. Bad match but Big E.’s return did wake up the crowd.

Big E. drinks the fluid in the jar holding his “testicles”. Stewart dances with New Day and the fans…well they care when Big E. dances at least.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph won a six way match to earn the shot and then it all went nuts. Ziggler started talking about how he was tired of being told that he always either too good or not good enough. It was time to turn up the jets and become champion for the third time. Serious Ziggler was nice but I don’t think anyone was buying him as having a real chance here. You know, because he’s Dolph Ziggler.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is defending and Shane and Daniel are here for no apparent reason. The fans are behind Ziggler and they trade some grappling on the mat with Ziggler getting the better of it (not exactly a surprise). The threat of a neckbreaker sends Ambrose bailing to the floor so Dolph splashes him against the barricade.

Back in and Ziggler’s jumping DDT is countered with Dean throwing him outside again. Ziggler escapes a super Dirty Deeds so Dean slaps on a half crab of all things. You can tell Dean is playing the subtle heel here as the smark crowd is always going to cheer for Ziggler. Dean heads up top and gets dropkicked out of the air but he’s right back with a double chickenwing facebuster.

Ambrose tunes up the band (which is now mocking Ziggler instead of anything involving Shawn Michaels) but shakes his head and tries Dirty Deeds instead. That’s reversed into the jumping DDT and both guys are down again. A double collision gives us another lay down period until Dean is up first and hammering away.

The top rope elbow gets two so Ziggler grabs the sleeper, earning them both a tumble out to the floor. Ziggler gets in the superkick on the floor but it’s barely two back inside. The Zig Zag gets the same but Dean pops back up with the rebound lariat. Ziggler catches Dean on top and pulls him back down, right into Dirty Deeds to retain the title at 15:22.

Rating: D+. And that people, is Ziggler choking again. This would lead to him saying he’s never won the big one, which would turn into him never holding the World Title that long because holding the title is more important than winning it. The match was nothing all that good as we were just waiting on Dirty Deeds, which only happened so Dean could keep it warm for AJ next month. That was completely obvious the second AJ pinned Cena again and that’s all this title needed to do.

Package on Summerslam weekend.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Eva Marie vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Dang I didn’t know the Glow was a year old. Actually hang on a minute as Eva Marie is suffering from exhaustion, anxiety and stress (likely brought on by reading too many Wellness Violation messages, which meant she would never wrestle again) so we have a replacement. At least we got that amazing entrance one more time.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

So yeah, you know full well that Nikki is going to be all that matters in this match because IT’S HER BIG COMEBACK THAT EVERYONE TOTALLY CARES ABOUT BECAUSE WE LOVE HER SO MUCH! She does get one heck of a pop though, which is rather scary. During her entrance, Mauro declares her return “miraculous”. Oh man this is going to be a long one.

Bliss rolls Becky up to start and gets in a hard slap for good measure. Naomi comes in to scare Alexa off so it’s Natalya instead. A forearm puts Natalya down and the splits legdrop gets two. Carmella comes in for the Staten Island Shuffle before a missed charge sends Natalya outside. Back in and a powerslam out of the corner plants Carmella before it’s off to Nikki, the heel, for a strong face pop.

We hit the chinlock but hang on as we need some Nikki pushups. Alexa chokeshoves Carmella down for the moonsault knees to the ribs as the crowd is dead all over again. The abdominal stretch keeps things slow until Carmella finally rolls over and makes the hot tag to Becky. All three heels are send into the corner for the springboard kicks from Lynch, followed by a Bexploder on Natalya.

Becky’s top rope legdrop gets two with Nikki making the save. A blind tag brings in Naomi for the dancing kicks with the fans just not reacting at all. Bliss’ springboard splash hits knees so it’s off to Nikki vs. Carmella. A bad looking Bronco Buster gets two on Nikki and everything breaks down. Nikki’s big forearm sets up the Rack Attack 2.0 (Nikki: “I’m back.”) for the pin at 11:16.

Rating: D. This was all about Nikki’s return and that’s not enough to carry a dull match. Naomi’s Glow stuff wasn’t over yet, Becky was stuck around people who weren’t up to her level and Carmella was showing that she didn’t need to be on the main roster yet. The same was true for Alexa and Natalya was her usual self. Just not a good match and it showed the lack of depth to the division.

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Rusev and Lana were married and so Reigns interrupted for no apparent reason to insult them and shove them into a cake.

Maria Menunos interviews Rusev and Lana, who don’t like her questions about Reigns. They won’t stand for this and Lana is sure that her husband will destroy Reigns.

We recap the Universal Title match. Basically we need a new title due to the Brand Split and Universal Title was the best they could come up with. Seth Rollins was put into the match as Raw’s #1 draft pick and Finn Balor earned his way in by winning a series of matches. Not much else to it as there’s no major animosity between them but it’s better than pulling the title out of a suitcase.

Seth did get in a great promo talking about how he’s done everything Balor has done but he’s done it a little bit better. He’s not wrong, though that’s not the best thing to do when you have someone so new to the main roster. Then Balor showed up as the Demon and scared Rollins to death.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes and the title (which isn’t that well received due to a bad case of being hideous) is vacant coming in. Unless I’m forgetting something, to date this is the only time Balor has wrestled as the Demon on the main roster. We get the Big Match Intros and the title itself receives some hearty boos. Balor dropkicks him into the corner at the bell but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace.

Instead Balor hits a suicide dive to the floor, followed by some kicks to the knee back inside. They head outside again with Seth getting in his first offense via a suplex on the floor. Balor is right back with something like a Phenomenal Forearm off the barricade. Back in again and Balor hits a basement dropkick for two as this is almost one sided so far. Finn stays on the leg as the fans are singing something.

Balor jumps over the ropes but Rollins slides between his legs and powerbombs him into the barricade, completely destroying Balor’s shoulder and putting him on the shelf for the better part of eight months. We’re less than four minutes in though and you can see the shoulder looking all messed up. Back in and Seth gets two off a backbreaker, setting up a chinlock. The chants are still going and it sounds like THAT TITLE SUCKS to the tune of John Cena Sucks.

Seth starts the trash talk and cuts off a comeback attempt. A snapmare into a kick to the back has Finn in even more trouble but Seth would rather walk around than follow up. It’s back to the chinlock for a good while until the springboard knee to the head sets up Seth’s frog splash for two. What looks like a Rainmaker is countered into a DDT to give Balor his first major offense in a long time and he follows up with some forearms.

A basement dropkick sets up the Sling Blade but Seth kicks him down without much effort. An enziguri stuns Balor but he’s right back with the Pele, earning a very nice round of applause. If nothing else the chants about the title have stopped. 1916 (reverse implant DDT) gives Finn two but the Coup de Grace is countered into a triangle choke of all things. Finn falls outside because rope breaks don’t count (anything goes remember) and things slow down a bit.

Back in and the buckle bomb sets up the low superkick for two on Balor with Seth looking stunned on the kickout. A small package driver gets the same count and reaction so Seth goes up, allowing Balor to hit a very loud enziguri to put him on the floor. Balor adds a shotgun dropkick to send him into the barricade, followed by a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for two. The Coup de Grace misses and it’s a Pedigree for two. Finn counters a second Pedigree into a double stomp, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 19:23.

Rating: B+. When you factor in that shoulder injury, this is quite the impressive performance. Above all else though, how good is it that Balor won the title here? If he loses his first major pay per view match and then goes away until April, he’s lucky to come back to the cruiserweight division.

This was a heck of a match with both guys beating the heck out of each other. It took some time to get built up but once they finally got there, the fans really started to accept things, which is a very positive sign. Balor is someone who is going to get a very positive reaction no matter what and giving him the title here was entirely the right call.

Balor can barely move his right arm after the match but finally holds the title up. On his WWE 24 special, he said you could feel and hear the shoulder crunching and crackling as he lifted the title and it probably did more damage to the arm.

The pre-show channel chats a bit and throws us to a KFC ad with Dolph Ziggler dressing up as Colonel Sanders to beat up Miz dressed as a chicken. It’s actually dumber than you remember it being.

Here’s Lana to introduce Rusev, albeit while wearing half of a wedding dress, the bottom of which looks like a diaper. She’s one of the most beautiful women on the roster but she looks ridiculous here.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is challenging and the booing is strong with this one. Rusev jumps him before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Roman being sent into the steps. The fans chant RUSEV MACHKA because they’ve given up on America over their hatred for Reigns. Roman gets in a Superman Punch as the bell hasn’t rung yet. They fight over a chair with Reigns getting the better of it and destroying Rusev. Reigns finally leaves but comes back with a spear, all while the fans chant WE WANT SLATER. No match of course, likely due to time issues.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar. This match was announced as Orton’s return match from surgery and the build focused on Orton being able to hit the RKO anytime, including a sweet moment where Orton interrupted a Lesnar promo with an RKO. The hype video even includes some OVW clips as they came up through developmental together and debuted within a few months of each other. This had a heck of a build and felt like something important but the question was whether Lesnar would have an actual match or just do his usual Lesnar stuff.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introduction, saying he’s conquering out of the University of Suplex City. Brock seems to get into his MMA stance to start before driving Orton into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Orton escapes the first German suplex attempt but can’t hit the RKO.

Now the first suplex connects (with Mauro knowing that it’s the 33^rd Lesnar has hit at Summerslam because he’s awesome that way) and Brock follows with two more. Orton is almost out on his feet so Lesnar suplexes him again. It’s nothing but suplexes at this point and it’s already getting dull. They head outside for a much needed change of pace with Orton being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton gets thrown from the front row through the table as this is dominance. The other table is loaded up but whatever Lesnar is trying is countered into the RKO onto (not through) the table. The hanging DDT plants Lesnar back inside and another RKO gets two. Orton realizes he has no choice and tries the Punt, only to have it reversed into the F5 (bad one) for two more.

That’s enough for Lesnar so he takes off the gloves and pads and hammers on Orton. An elbow to the head actually busts Orton open VERY badly. Lesnar just keeps hammering on him while the fans chant GOLDBERG until the referee FINALLY stops it at 11:47. I’ve heard a bunch of answers about what happened but I believe this was the planned ending and a hard way opening.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work when it happened and it didn’t work again this time around. Lesnar suplexing Orton for five minutes then selling a few big moves doesn’t make me think it’s an awesome main event. This was everything wrong with Lesnar’s current WWE run in one match and that made for a really dull match, save for the odd finish that seemed designed to protect Orton. You know, after he was basically squashed.

Lesnar keeps hammering on him until the always intimidating Shane McMahon comes out, earning himself an F5 (which thankfully didn’t lead anywhere). Heyman panics as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut an hour (or more) out of this, it’s bordering on the classic level. As it is, this is just a good show that runs WAY too long. At some point you have to cut something out and WWE just refuses to do that. Cut out the Dudleys match or the women’s tag and give us some breathing room here because sweet goodness this show could use it.

Now that being said, there’s some outstanding stuff on here with the Styles vs. Cena match as an instant classic, the Women’s Title being very good, a great Universal Title match and really only the Tag Team Title match being without much value. The show is certainly good and the positives outweigh the negatives but unless the show is a masterpiece, fans are going to start losing interest near the end. It’s a solid show but cut out a good forty minutes to really make it great.

Ratings Comparison

American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Original: C

2017 Redo: B-

Dudley Boyz vs. Neville/Sami Zayn

Original: C

2017 Redo: C-

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

2017 Redo: B

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

Original: C+

2017 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Original: B

2017 Redo: B

Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Original: C

2017 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A

2017 Redo: A

New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

2017 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Original: C

2017 Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

2017 Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

2017 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

2017 Redo: B-

That’s quite the drop on Ambrose vs. Ziggler and Lesnar vs. Orton. Some of them are spot on though and that’s not the biggest surprise.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/08/21/summerslam-2016-they-didnt/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2015
Date: August 23, 2015
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,702
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I barely remember anything about it save for the two main events. It really is amazing that these shows have just stopped standing out aside from Wrestlemania. Unfortunately we’re at the point where Summerslam is now a regular four hour show because three hours of pay per view plus five hours of TV a week and a two hour NXT show the night before this just isn’t enough. Let’s get to it.

Thankfully there was no pre-show match so we can get straight to the regular show. When you have three hours and forty four minutes on pay per view, you really don’t need an eight minute warmup match.

Here’s host Jon Stewart to open things up. Stewart hypes up the crowd and says it’s nice to be back in reality after spending sixteen years talking about politics. The WWE superstars respects their audience and they’re all ready to thrill this crowd. Jon lists off some names appearing on the show and of course Reigns and Cena are loudly booed. He’s not over the Streak being broken yet and is here to talk to Brock face to face about defeating the Undertaker.

Stewart isn’t crazy though and has brought some backup in the form of Mick Foley. Mick comes out and reminds Stewart that he only has one ear and thought Jon said he wanted to talk to ROCK. Stewart: “Are you telling me that the great Mick Foley is afraid of Brock Lesnar?” Foley: “Jon that’s exactly what I’m telling you!”

Stewart brings up the Cell match against Undertaker and calls it inspirational. Foley agrees that it was inspirational but also reminds Jon that IT WAS SEVENTEEN YEARS AGO. Mick has never been to Suplex City and he’s not starting tonight so he’s out of here. Stewart says on with the show to end this moderately funny bit. Above all else though, Stewart is clearly a huge fan and that helps so much in something like this. It felt like he’s here because it’s something he’s always wanted to do instead of just something he’s doing to promote a movie or whatever.

Opening video focuses on New York City (of course) and then goes into the main events.

I forgot how annoying that “We Cool For The Summer” song can be.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

This is fallout from Sheamus attacking Orton when Orton had the WWE World Title won, leading to a failed Money in the Bank cash-in attempt by the pale one. Cole: “Speaking of Money in the Bank, Randy Orton has had a great career right here at Summerslam.” Eventually he gets around to tying that together by saying Orton cashed in his briefcase two years ago but that’s not the best statement to start out with.

The fans tell Sheamus that he looks stupid and he has to bail from a very early RKO attempt. Actually Sheamus grabs the mic and gets on the announcers’ table to say the fans look stupid, not him. Orton is willing to fight on the floor but Sheamus takes him down with a clothesline. Sheamus actually hits a top rope knee drop for a rare sight. The slow beating continues with Sheamus stopping to adjust the mohawk.

A chinlock doesn’t last long so Sheamus takes him right back down and puts on another chinlock. Randy finally comes back with a clothesline and the backbreaker, followed by a suplex over the top and out to the floor. Back in and Sheamus gets two off a powerslam to set up a modified Cloverleaf. That’s escaped as well (because other than Chris Jericho, heels can’t win with submissions) and Orton hits the elevated DDT.

Sheamus gets the ten forearms to the chest but slingshots right into the RKO. Orton has to throw him back inside though and that means it’s time for the Punt. Yeah don’t even bother at this point as I don’t think anyone buys it as a real threat. Instead White Noise gets two, followed by back to back Brogue Kicks for the pin on Orton at 12:24.

Rating: C+. This was a longer version of a Raw match with a surprisingly clean ending. You kind of expect Sheamus to lose here but Orton losing instead was a nice change of pace. The problem is these two really don’t have a ton of chemistry and they were just kind of trading moves until the finish.

Some fans won a contest from Draftkings.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores vs. Prime Time Players

One fall to a finish. For reasons I don’t want to know, the Prime Time Players are defending. New Day, still heels, offer to explain hip hop to the Brooklyn fans. We immediately get the New Age Outlaws strategy with Big E. trying to pin Kofi but only getting two. Instead it’s Kofi headlocking Cara down before Sin monkey flips his partner onto Kofi for two.

That means it’s time for Big E. who takes a Tajiri handspring into an enziguri. Young comes in to face Cara and things get WAY faster with neither guy being able to get anywhere before it’s a stalemate. Darren reaches over to get Kofi and gets a splash on the back from Big E. Los Matadores steal the advantage and hit a slingshot hilo for two on Darren. The yet to be named Unicorn Stampede gives New Day control again as Woods lists off their favorite breakfast foods. You can see the cereal schtick coming from here.

Kofi chinlocks Young for a bit before Big E. grabs a dancing abdominal stretch. Big E. hits a clothesline and Woods loses his mind shouting about tricep meat. Woods: “YOU CAN’T EVEN GET A HAMBURGER IN WWE BECAUSE BIG E. HAS THE MARKET CORNERED ON TRICEP MEAT!!!” Darren finally knocks Kofi away and makes the hot tag off to Titus for the house cleaning.

Everything breaks down and the masked men start with all their dives. El Torito’s double springboard dive is caught in midair by Woods (Torito really is small) so Young belly to back suplexes Xavier on the apron, only to have Big E. hit his spear through the ropes. He’s going to kill himself with that one day. Back in and Titus powerbombs the Dragons in the Tower of Doom, followed by the Clash of the Titus to Fernando. That brings Kofi back in to kick Titus in the face though and Big E. steals the pin on Fernando to get the titles back at 11:20.

Rating: B-. This started slowly with the normal problem of too many bodies at once but as usual it went away once they started tagging. The problem continues to be how weak the division is though as you have three middling teams and then the awesome New Day who was just begging to turn face at this point. It was clearly their time and there was no other option than to put the titles back on them here. Somehow they still hold the belts heading into the following Summerslam which just doesn’t happen these days.

New Day goes INSANE celebrating with Big E.’s hips defying gravity and Kofi bouncing around the match on his back.

Jon Stewart brags to Neville and Stephen Amell (celebrity here for a match) about being friends with Undertaker. The lights go out and Undertaker (or someone who looks a lot like him) walks past. The bragging quickly ends.

We recap Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler. Rusev threw Lana out so she hooked up with Ziggler while Rusev hooked up with Summer Rae. This led to several blonde catfights but tonight it’s the guys fighting alone.

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler goes right after him to start but misses a charge to go face first into the buckle. The Russian/Bulgarian (whatever he is this week) stomps away and we hit an early bearhug. The fans cheer for Lana as Ziggler is planted with a spinout Rock Bottom. Rusev’s gorilla press (in case you thought Dolph was doing it) is countered into a DDT and it’s time for the running clotheslines required for all face comebacks.

For some reason Rusev goes up top with Ziggler faceplanting him down for two more. A sunset flip gives Dolph two and he grabs the sleeper but Rusev uses the powers of THIS ISN’T 1982 to escape. Dolph joins the twentieth century with a Fameasser for a near fall but walks into the jumping superkick to the arm. The Accolade goes on but Lana slaps Summer to distract Rusev into breaking the hold. The guys join them on the floor as Lana gets the loudest chant of the night. Rusev gets superkicked onto the announcers’ table and it’s a double countout at 11:49.

Rating: C. This was an extended Raw match with a non-finish. Lana definitely came off as the biggest star here, which is why they dropped her face push because of a wrist injury and TMZ reporting that she and Rusev were engaged. Naturally WWE had ABSOLUTELY NO CHOICE but to acknowledge this on Raw and punish her as a result. I’m in the small group that likes this story though some of that is due to Lana in her outfits.

Another catfight ensues.

We recap Stephen Amell/Neville vs. Stardust/King Barrett. Neville and Stardust had been doing a comic book inspired feud between a hero and a villain. One night Stardust shoved Amell (the star of the Green Arrow TV show) and a tag match was made with Barrett joining in due to having nothing else to do.

Stephen Amell/Neville vs. Stardust/King Barrett

Stephen comes out in his Arrow hood but wrestles in regular black shorts. Barrett gets hit in the face to start so Stardust comes in to face Neville instead. Stardust wants Amell though and Stephen gets a pretty good pop as he flips over the top to come in. A shove sends Stephen down so he nips up and knocks Stardust up against the ropes for a surprise. It’s off to Barrett who easily takes over on Amell. As odd as it is to see the celebrity getting beaten up, Neville has to be the one coming in to clean house when we get to the hot tag.

Amell finally gets in an enziguri and dives over for the tag to Neville. The rapid fire kicks set up the middle rope Phoenix Splash on Barrett but Stardust makes the save. The villains are sent to the floor and Stephen dives off the top onto both of them for the big spot of the match. Back in and the Red Arrow finishes Barrett at 7:34.

Rating: C+. Of course that’s on a sliding scale as Amell has no idea what he’s doing here and was just doing whatever he could. It’s not exactly a huge star out there but it fit the story well enough. Unfortunately Barrett takes the fall here, despite Stardust being the main bad guy in the whole thing.

Look at WWE taking over Brooklyn.

Intercontinental Title: Ryback vs. The Miz vs. Big Show

Ryback is defending and the other two have both taken shots at the title. Miz takes sanctuary on the floor but comes back in to try a double suplex on Big Show. Yeah I think you know what’s coming there, especially when you notice that Show would have broken his back on the turnbuckle if they had suplexed him from there.

They really need to find a way to stop telegraphing that kind of thing. Show actually hits a middle rope swanton (well forward roll) onto Ryback before chopping Miz in the corner. Ryback takes out Show’s knee and plants Miz with a powerslam for two. That’s enough being on defense for Show as he chokeslams Ryback onto Miz but the KO Punch is countered with a spinebuster. It was a bit sloppy but what can you expect when it’s to someone Big Show’s size?

The Shell Shock plants Show but Miz runs in with the Skull Crushing Finale for two on the champ. Miz covers both of them twice each but it only serves to tick Ryback out. Shell Shock is broken up with the KO and Miz makes ANOTHER save. Another KO drops Miz but Ryback clotheslines Show to the floor and steals the pin on Miz to retain at 5:34. Cole: “CLASSIC TRIPLE THREAT MATCH!” Oh shut up.

Rating: C+. This was just a Raw match but they kept things moving well enough that I was entertained throughout. It wasn’t anything we haven’t seen before but I liked Ryback copying Miz’s strategy to keep the title. Ryback was getting somewhere with the title and could have been something special if they hadn’t dropped him yet again. It’s no wonder he left less than a year later.

Jon Stewart goes to see Brock but gets cut off by Heyman. Stewart says wrestling fans were disappointed in the Streak ending and no one remembers the person who broke perfection. Heyman is probably happy to see the fans all crushed and destroyed like that because he likes giving coal to kids on Christmas morning. Paul sings about the glory of Lesnar in response. I’m with Heyman here. The Streak was amazing and will never be duplicated but it’s ridiculous to say it can never be broken no matter what because fans would be sad. Sometimes evil wins and there’s nothing that can be done about it.

Wyatt Family vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose

Harper and Wyatt here. Bray targeted Reigns earlier in the summer and Roman was tired of getting beaten up so he got some help. It’s almost weird to see Reigns coming through the crowd instead of the entrance. Cole flat out says the feud isn’t ending tonight because it’s going to go on and on. Ambrose bulldogs Harper to start so Bray comes in, only to get punched in the mouth.

A suicide dive takes Bray down again and it’s already a wild brawl. Reigns dives over Ambrose to clothesline Harper in a cool spot before Ambrose runs all three tables to take out Bray as well. Things settle down with the Shield guys taking turns on Harper. Dean’s top rope elbow gets two but a Bray distraction lets Harper get a shot in. Roman goes after him but Harper suicide dives onto Roman, only to have Dean take them both out with another dive.

Harper kicks Dean in the face and Bray drops the backsplash to really take over for the first time. Bray gets creative with a suplex through the ropes to the floor. Back to Harper for something like a Crossface as Reigns is STILL down on the floor a good three and a half minutes after that beatdown. The referee stops to look at something in the corner as a ROMAN’S SLEEPING chant starts up.

Dean finally hits the rebound lariat as Reigns gets back on the apron for the hot tag. Him being down on the floor that long really didn’t mean anything but it’s not something that looks good, especially given some of the stuff Reigns has been laughed at before. A superkick and Batista Bomb plant Reigns but Bray spends too much time going up and gets Superman Punched. Dean plays Hawk in a Doomsday Device and the DoubleBomb plants Harper. Dirty Deeds and a spear put Bray down at 10:56.

Rating: B. That should wake the crowd up a bit. Other than Reigns’ latest nap, this was a good old fashioned fight with both teams looking awesome throughout. That being said, I’m so glad the feud is going to keep going after Reigns just pinned Bray. It should be the blowoff but why blow it off when you can just keep going with even more matches?

We recap John Cena vs. Seth Rollins in a title for title match with Cena narrating a video about how tough New Yorkers are. The video is a cool look at all the venues in and around New York City as it’s almost always about Madison Square Garden. A few weeks ago Rollins broke Cena’s nose in a NASTY looking injury so Cena is after revenge and to end Rollins’ joke (Cena’s description) of a title reign. He’s right to be fair as Rollins basically bowed down to HHH as often as he could and was getting squashed by Brock the previous month to make him look like a loser.

WWE World Title/US Title: Seth Rollins vs. John Cena

Winner take all. The JOHN CENA SUCKS song is out in full swing here as the people just do not like Cena. Rollins comes out in white, albeit with lines painted on that makes it look like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle shell. The fans are all over Cena again and it’s Rollins hitting a dropkick to take over and giving Cena You Can’t See Me. Oh yeah he’s the face in this match and everyone knows it. Cena grabs a belly to belly and we hit the chinlock less than two minutes in.

Rollins comes right back by sending Cena to the floor for back to back suicide dives and a big flip dive over the top. Back in and Cena’s finishing sequence is broken up with a headlock takeover but the second ProtoBomb works a bit better. Rollins is still able to break up the Shuffle but Cena comes back with a HORRIBLE springboard Stunner, basically making it look like he was reaching for Seth’s wrist instead of the neck. I think he retired it after this show and you can’t blame him after how bad that looked. Rollins comes back with double knees to the chest and a standing shooting star for two.

Cena is sat on top and then tied into the Tree of Woe for Alberto Del Rio’s top rope double stomp (which Seth makes look much better) for another near fall. Back up and the first AA connects for two and we’re not even nine minutes into the match. You think they might be trying a bit too hard?

They do the big slugout until Cena catapults him into the corner to set up a faceplant for another near fall. They’re certainly doing some different stuff tonight and it helps a lot. What doesn’t help is the announcers acting like this is the main event of Wrestlemania and that it’s been going on for half an hour instead of ten minutes. That’s not even a Raw main event yet.

Seth is right back in it by breaking up a super AA attempt and hitting a great looking frog splash. Rollins rolls through a crossbody and hits his own AA to an even bigger face pop. Back up and Rollins misses the Phoenix Splash, only to flip out of the AA. The Pedigree doesn’t work either and it’s Cena grabbing a Figure Four because RIC FLAIR.

Rollins reverses but Cena makes the ropes and goes up top with Rollins running the ropes for a superplex into the falcon’s arrow for a near fall. That really should be the finish but of course it’s only good for two. Another Phoenix Splash misses and Cena grabs another AA but the referee gets bumped. With Cena demanding another ref, Rollins hits the jumping knee to the face and here’s Jon Stewart with a chair. Both guys get up and Stewart gives Cena a shot to the ribs, setting up a Pedigree on the chair to give Rollins the US Title at 19:25.

Rating: B+. This was on the way to being a classic but the Stewart ending was a bad choice when Rollins and Stewart had been feuding for months. The explanation was that Jon didn’t want Cena to tie Flair’s record because IT’S RIC FLAIR! I’m fine with Cena not getting the title back as him wanting the US Title back made it seem all the more important. Unfortunately it also made the WWE World Title look horrible because Rollins had to lose to drop that title. But hey, Jon Stewart right?

WWE Network ad.

Pre-show panel chat and they have to talk over a THANK YOU STEWART chant.

We recap the Divas Revolution which means STEPHANIE TIME! For anyone who doesn’t get my obsessive hatred of almost all things Stephanie, this was my breaking point. For weeks, Paige had dealt with the Bellas and their numbers advantage with the idea being she would need help. Say, with the arrival of some friends from NXT?

Well that’s what happened, but only because Stephanie came out and announced they (as in Charlotte, Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch) were here. For some reason Stephanie put them into three women teams and a feud was started “for superiority”. Yeah superiority instead of the story they had spent months building up. But whatever. Story telling isn’t what’s important. It’s all about putting Stephanie, that pioneer of women’s wrestling, in the story so she gets credit for the (very) cool moment.

Team B.A.D. vs. Team Bella vs. Team PCB

B.A.D. – Sasha Banks, Naomi, Tamina Snuka

Bella – Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Alicia Fox

PCB – Paige, Charlotte, Becky Lynch

This is under elimination rules, meaning the a single fall eliminates an entire team, making the match far less interesting from the start. Brie and Becky start things off as we hear about the history of Summerslam being in the New York area. Becky is sent into the ropes for a running knee to the face (with Brie shouting TEAM BELLA instead of BRIE MODE, which may or may not be worse) but Tamina tags herself in to superkick Becky in the jaw.

Sasha comes in to a very nice reaction….and she’s back out in less than five seconds. It’s Naomi coming in despite almost no one caring about her whatsoever. The fans want Sasha so she’s back in, gets rolled up for two, and is back out in about thirty seconds. They head outside with Charlotte saving Sasha with a spear to Tamina, only to have Naomi and Sasha hit (well less so in Sasha’s case) flip dives.

The Bellas hit suicide dives, which Cole incorrectly calls something new. Paige and Alicia fight on the top until Paige knocks her off and dives onto everyone at once. Back in and Brie hits a super facebuster on Tamina for the elimination, taking a lot of the life away from the crowd who wanted to see Sasha. That’s being pretty greedy though as Sasha was in the match for at least 50 seconds.

Nikki hits a quick Rack Attack on Becky for no cover as Paige and Charlotte drag their partner back to the corner. A fall away slam sends Nikki to the floor but she Paige takes too long following her out, meaning it’s an Alabama Slam on the outside. Back in and a double flapjack plants Paige, setting up a Brie chinlock. The YES Kicks are countered into a rollup for two but Fox comes back in to work on a double arm crank.

Now the fans will settle for Charlotte as Paige gets double suplexed for two. A running knee to Fox finally allows the hot tag to Charlotte as the crowd FINALLY wakes up a bit. Everything breaks down with Nikki having to save Alicia from the Figure Eight. A double big boot drops Charlotte and Fox so it’s off to Becky vs. Brie but BRIE MODE misses, setting up a pumphandle suplex to pin Brie at 15:17.

Rating: C. Well that happened. It didn’t revolutionize anything, it didn’t change anything, it didn’t accomplish anything and it annoyed the fans when Sasha was eliminated in about five minutes. But hey, Stephanie got a focus in the pre-match video and Nikki gets a step closer to vanquishing AJ from the pages of the WWE record books. That’s all that matters right?

Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens

This started over the two of them wanting to face Cena for the US Title. Owens is coming in after a brutal ladder match last night at Takeover: Brooklyn. They slug it out to start with Owens sending him to the floor for a flip dive. Owens spends too much time jawing at Cole though and it’s Cesaro running back inside for a corkscrew plancha of his own. The Uppercut Train takes too long though and Cesaro is sent into the barricade to set up a cannonball.

The backsplash gets two inside and we hit the chinlock on Cesaro. A torture rack neckbreaker gives Owens two more and it’s time for a second chinlock. The powers of the OLE chants bring Cesaro back to life though and he knocks Owens into the corner to set up that weird modified Angle Slam for two. Cesaro’s gutwrench superplex gets two but Owens throws him down a few seconds later, only to miss a double springboard moonsault.

A superkick gets Owens out of trouble but the springboard corkscrew uppercut drops him again. The Swing sets up Cesaro’s Sharpshooter with Owens only a few feet from the ropes for the quick break. Both guys go up for something but Cesaro gets crotched and superplexed to set up the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 14:17.

Rating: B. You knew this was going to be good with these two on this stage. They kind of had to give Owens the win here after he lost in his NXT farewell last night but it’s still not good to have Cesaro lose here either. That’s the problem with the way they book their midcarders: they’re bounced around so much with wins and losses all over the place that a loss on a big stage really cripples them all over again. At least the match was good.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker. Of course Brock broke the Streak at Wrestlemania XXX and Undertaker disappeared for a long time. Then Undertaker returned at Battleground 2015 to cost Lesnar the WWE World Title to set up this match. They actually billed this as being too big for Wrestlemania which was a good line, though I’m not sure how many people actually believed it.

Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Lesnar is actually smart enough to attack at the bell and I can’t believe no one else has ever thought of that before. Undertaker comes back with a boot to the face and Brock is sent outside as it’s time for the brawl to begin. The bell rings and Brock double legs him down, only to have Undertaker hit him in the face to take over. The dueling UNDERTAKER/SUPLEX CITY chants start up and Old School is countered into an F5 but Undertaker slips off the shoulders.

It’s Suplex City time though, or at least it would be until Undertaker sends him face first into the middle turnbuckle. A big boot puts Brock on the floor and draws some blood from his forehead. Back in and the chokeslam is countered with another German suplex so Brock cracks a smile. They head outside again and there’s an F5 to send Undertaker through the table.

Somewhere in there Brock got busted open much worse and stands in the ring with another smile on his face. Undertaker slowly crawls back in with Brock telling Undertaker that he’s going to kill him. Undertaker: “YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO!” That earns Brock a chokeslam (and a great selling job) and a Tombstone for a close two. Both guys are down until Brock sits up and laughs.

Undertaker does the situp and mocks Lesnar’s laughing so, while still on the mat, they just PUNCH EACH OTHER IN THE FACE OVER AND OVER. Brock gets the better of it and takes him into the corner for the Kimura on the second rope. Of course that’s not a DQ or even a count from the referee because that’s not what the story calls for, meaning Undertaker has to Last Ride him out for two.

The second F5 gets two and the second gets the same as I continue to hate how much WWE lets people kick out of finishers. I know it’s a big match but at what point does a finisher become just another move that someone uses? Both guys are spent but Undertaker pulls him into the Hell’s Gate. That’s reversed into the Kimura and the bell rings for the big surprise submission. Not so fast though as the referee waves it off, allowing Undertaker to hit Lesnar low and put on the Hell’s Gate again. Lesnar flips Undertaker off and passes out for the submission/knockout at 17:10.

Rating: B+. That ending (which we’ll come back to in a minute) brings down an otherwise great old school power brawl. Undertaker teasing a heel turn to get the big win is a big stretch as he reached bulletproof legend status well over ten years ago. I get the story they’re going for and it’s not bad, but the low blow wasn’t really necessary here.

The important thing here though was Undertaker hurt Brock. You can have Lesnar be the Beast and maul people but at some point someone has to be able to hurt him or there’s no point in bringing him out. Look at what he did to Ambrose at Wrestlemania XXXII or Rollins at Battleground 2015. It stops being entertaining and starts being the Brock Lesnar Show, which doesn’t do anyone any good but him. This was different though, and that’s a good thing.

We get a replay oh yes Undertaker does tap out. So yeah, it’s a screwy ending for the sake of setting up a rematch, just like in the other main event. That’s not a bright idea at any show, especially the second biggest of the year. Heyman declares Brock the winner via submission to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This is a really strong show with nothing bad and a bunch of good matches but the top two are ruined by the horrible booking choices. Above all else though, this show was ruined by the length. This show runs nearly three and three quarter hours with a lot of stuff that could have been cut.

I mean, was anyone needing Rusev and Ziggler to go ten minutes or a sixteen minute Divas three way? It’s a good example of a show that could have been trimmed quite a bit for its own good, which unfortunately is a recurring trend these days. This was a very good show otherwise but it’s not exactly memorable and that hurts it a bit.

Ratings Comparison

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Prime Time Players vs. New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Lucha Dragons

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: C

Redo: C

Stephen Amell/Neville vs. King Barrett/Stardust

Original: B+

Redo: C+

The Miz vs. Big Show vs. Ryback

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Wyatt Family

Original: C+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Team Bella vs. Team PCB vs. Team B.A.D.

Original: C-

Redo: C

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

That original overall rating is probably a bit high as I liked almost everything more the second time around. Being able to watch this in pieces instead of in a straight sitting helps it a lot.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/08/23/summerslam-2015-a-long-long-very-long-summer/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2014
Date: August 17, 2014
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,079
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Time for a redo of a show with a main event billed as the Biggest Fight of the Summer. The more I think of that line, the more I like it. The main event here is Cena (subbing for the injured Bryan) defending against Brock Lesnar, who is having his first match since breaking the Streak. Interestingly enough, I don’t even remember another match from this card. Let’s get to it.

I usually don’t say anything on the pre-show, but my goodness Renee Young is stunning. I know you often hear about the Divas looking great, but she is just beautiful, especially in a nice red dress here.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

No real story here. Rob rolls out of a wristlock to start and we hit the ECW chants. My goodness there’s other stuff to cheer over people. Cesaro is sent to the floor and Rob slips a bit on his dive but still manages to kick Cesaro down and hit Rolling Thunder on the outside. Back in and Cesaro simplifies stuff by just pummeling Van Dam in the corner before throwing him down with the gutwrench suplex.

We take a break and come back with Cesaro holding a chinlock as the announcers give us one final hype for Cena vs. Lesnar. Rob fights up for a rolling cradle and the split legged moonsault for two, followed by a superkick to put Cesaro back on the floor. This is Van Dam 101 here, which was the biggest criticism he faced during this time. The Five Star is broken up by a big uppercut but Rob is still able to block a superplex.

That earns him another uppercut though because Cesaro is pesky like that. Van Dam shoves him down again but Cesaro hits the third straight uppercut, only to be shoved down yet again. Rob is finally able to dive…..right into an uppercut of course. This time it’s Cesaro kicking Rob in the face for two and frustration is setting in. Back up and Van Dam hits his quick step over kick, followed by the Five Star for the pin at 8:06.

Rating: C-. The uppercut sequence was nice but like I said, Van Dam was just doing high spots here and nothing else. That was the case for most of his 2014 run and that’s not really doing anything for him at this point. Cesaro was just wandering around at this point, which makes his Wrestlemania battle royal win feel like the biggest waste of a rub in recent history, which is really covering a lot of ground.

In a sign of the times, Hulk Hogan is brought out to open the show. Well to be fair it worked really well at Wrestlemania XXX so this isn’t the worst idea in the world. He thinks it’s appropriate for Hollywood Hogan to open the show here in Los Angeles and talks about how amazing Summerslam really is. This turns into a commercial for the Network, all while Hogan’s video is playing behind him. Hogan hits the catchphrase and he’s out in less than three minutes. This was fine and got the crowd fired up while also plugging something. Well done.

The opening video is in the theme of an old 1980s action movie trailer (Follow the Buzzards Productions) with the usual previews for the main events, but with everyone’s nickname instead of their actual name. I really liked this as a movie geek and it holds up quite well a year later.

It’s a shame that the curse of the standardized sets has hit Summerslam as well. It’s the second biggest show of the year. Mix that stuff up people.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is defending and has the Hollywood star gimmick. I still really like his work in this and still find him to be one of the better done characters. Before the match, Miz talks about being real instead of CGI and brags about how jealous you all should be of the moneymaker. Tonight he’s going to make Ziggler the WWE version of the Lakers. Feeling out process to start as the announcers talk about the Ice Bucket Challenge, back when that was still a thing.

The threat of a superkick sends Miz bailing to the floor as we hear about the Shawn Michaels vs. Rick Martel match from Summerslam 1992 where it was agreed that neither would hit the other in the face. Back in and a quick rollup gets two for Dolph but he gets whipped chest first into the corner as Miz takes over. With his variety of stomps used up, Miz kicks Dolph hard in the face before slapping on a chinlock.

The fans tell Miz that he can’t wrestle, but you could say the same thing about Ziggler so it’s not really clear. Dolph punches him out of the air and hits a Stinger Splash before a rollup gets two more. Now the superkick connects with the moneymaker for two so we get the required attempt at bailing, only to have Dolph baseball slide him down.

Somehow that earns Ziggler a Figure Four (because Miz needed a submission hold and it’s always a good thing to pay tribute to Flair, who won SO many major matches with that hold right?) but Dolph is in the ropes. His leg is fine enough for a Fameasser but Miz pops to his feet for the Skull Crushing Finale before he starts to sell. The kickout shocks Miz again but he misses another running boot, allowing Dolph to score with the Zig Zag for the pin and the title at 7:57.

Rating: C-. These two don’t have any kind of special chemistry but they would fight each other for the better part of eternity because WWE doesn’t know how to set up anything fresh more than once every few months. Ziggler winning the title gave the fans a nice moment but there was nothing to the match.

We recap the latest part of the RIVETING Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon feud where Stephanie brought Daniel Bryan’s physical therapist to say she and Bryan had an affair, leading to Brie slapping the therapist and getting arrested, just as she had done to Stephanie a few weeks earlier. The affair stuff was so hated that they dropped it pretty much the next day.

Brie talks about doing a bunch of reflecting while she was in jail where she thought about Stephanie torturing Nikki while Brie was gone, how she insulted Bryan and how she paid the therapist to lie about an affair. She’s going to take out the beast tonight because that’s best for business. Oh dear I think I’m going to have something to say about this.

Divas Title: Paige vs. AJ Lee

Paige is challenging and they’ve been feuding for most of the summer with AJ returning and winning the title, causing Paige to start imitating her for reasons that still aren’t clear. They’re friends and enemies at the same time (yes I know there’s a word that combines the two and no I won’t use it) so Paige offers a handshake, only to have AJ rip some of her hair out. AJ stays all aggressive (Heaven help me if I say the other word about her) and sends Paige onto the announcers’ table, only to have Paige come back with a knee to the ribs.

The champ gets dropped onto the barricade but Paige realizes she can’t win the title via countout. Back in and we get Paige’s sexy crawl over AJ before she pulls her own hair extensions out. Well no one ever accused Paige of being normal. The chinlock on AJ goes nowhere and she’s able to shove Paige off the top, though she’s nice enough to blow her a kiss first.

A top rope clothesline to the floor drops Paige again. The Shining Wizard gets two but Paige kicks her in the face, only to have the Paige Turner countered into the Black Widow. Just like at the Raw after Wrestlemania though, Paige powers out again and scores with the Rampaige for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This was similar to the Divas version of Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. Perfect back at Summerslam 1993 where they basically guaranteed a classic but just had a good match instead. This was one of the last good feuds before Nikki took over the title in a few months, which we’re somehow still surviving nine months later. Lucky us.

Summerslam 2015 will be in New York/New Jersey. That would be slightly changed to Brooklyn

Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

Speaking of things still going on later, these two are still having the same match the following summer. This is also a flag match, meaning a regular match with the winner getting their flag raised. Lana (rocking the white suit here) and Zeb Colter (remember him?) are the seconds. Before the match, Lana says that Hollywood is a great example of everything wrong with America. In real life, there is no happy ending and America is full of worthless cowards.

Swagger counters with members of the US Army Color Guard to present the American flag. Rusev jumps Jack before the bell and the American flag falls, which is a big sign of disrespect. Swagger counters into a Patriot Lock as we’re still waiting on the bell. The referee breaks it up so Lana orders Rusev to his feet. Now the bell rings and Jack goes after the leg and ankle again.

Rusev bails to the floor so Swagger, showing some fire for a change, follows him out with a hard clothesline. The Vader Bomb hits knees though, which really should hurt the bad leg but why bother with logic? Jack happens to have bad ribs coming in so Rusev has his own target now. With the leg breaking down, Rusev opts for a bearhug, meaning he has to stay on his feet anyway. Jack can’t belly to belly his way to freedom but his second attempt works a bit better.

The Vader Bomb connects but hurts Jack’s ribs all over again. Rusev’s superkick is caught in the Patriot Lock but Rusev is quickly out, only to walk into a powerslam for two. The second superkick connects and the Accolade (on one leg) goes on, only to be countered into the Patriot Lock. Rusev kicks out of that as well, spinwheel kicks Jack down, and Accolades him again for the knockout victory.

Rating: C. This is a tricky one to grade, as yet again, since these guys have fought roughly a dozen times, I never once believed Rusev was in trouble. That being said, they did a good job here of using the ankle injury to try to add some drama. It’s a very difficult thing to do when there is almost zero doubt as to who is winning, but they gave it a good try.

The problem for these two is they’re still fighting on occasion and it never gets any closer for Jack. That’s something WWE is really bad about: they don’t understand that fans don’t want to see the same obvious match over and over again but that’s what we get because there’s no one other than Swagger (or Henry) to take these losses. Bring back unknown jobbers or something, because they have about the same chance of winning and would at least feel fresh for a change.

Rusev attacks Colter post match and the Russian flag comes down.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose, which is Dean’s first attempt for revenge on Seth after Rollins broke up the Shield over the summer. Seth ran a lot previously but tonight it’s time for a lumberjack match so Dean can finally get his hands on him.

Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

Most of the lumberjacks were attacked by Rollins and the Shield at some point in the last year and a half. Rollins is Mr. Money in the Bank here. It’s a slugout as soon as they’re both in the ring with Dean taking over and knocking Rolling outside. That goes as badly as you would expect for Rollins so he goes back inside for something a bit safer: Ambrose ripping at his nose. This time it’s Dean being sent outside for a beating but some guys hold the attackers back.

Now it’s Rollins in control for a bit so Ambrose just punches him in the face. He goes up top for no logical reason (to be fair he’s supposed to be crazy) and gets caught in the Tree of Woe as Seth really takes over. A chinlock doesn’t go very far as Dean is sent to the apron, only to suplex Rollins over the top and out onto the lumberjacks in a big crash. The whole thing turns into a war with Dean backdropping Rollins over the barricade.

Dean dives onto the lumberjacks because he’s nuts and then down the announcers’ tables to get to Rollins in the crowd. This is more like what the match should have been and it’s about time they got to it. They fight into the balcony as Kane comes down to tell the lumberjacks to do their job. Bo Dallas stops Rollins from powerbombing Dean off the balcony so Seth runs towards the entrance but gets caught by Stardust, Big E. and the Usos.

Rollins is literally carried back to the ring but Dean is waiting on them with a huge dive off the top. Back in and Dirty Deeds is countered but Ambrose blasts him with the rebound lariat. NOW the crowd is way into things and Dean curb stomps Seth, only to have Kane come in for the save. The lumberjacks get in another fight because they all have anger management issues. Dean dispatches the Wyatts but walks into a briefcase shot to the face for the pin.

Rating: B-. This is one where your opinions may vary wildly and I’m not going to put up much of an argument either way. There were only so many ways that they mess with the idea to keep the lumberjack gimmick going (which fit the story) while also being insane. Good, insane brawl here and that’s what it needed to be.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt, which started because Bray decided it was time and didn’t like Jericho calling himself a savior. Jericho beat Wyatt clean at Battleground in a stupid decision so tonight the Family is barred from ringside. I have no idea why they thought this would make me interested in seeing it again but it’s better than another gimmick match.

Bray Wyatt vs. Chris Jericho

The fireflies are still so cool looking. Bray goes right after him to start and they’re quickly on the floor with Jericho stepping over Bray’s hat. That’s polite of him. Jericho gets shoved to the floor as the announcers start reading Tweets. I know the match isn’t the most thrilling story in the world but come on. A running knee sends Jericho’s head into the steps and Bray drives him into the post for good measure.

Back inside and we hit the chinlock, because no matter how insane or unconventional someone is, they make sure to throw on a chinlock. Like everyone has ever done, Jericho fights out with ease and gets one off an enziguri. Jericho’s dropkick stops a charging Bray but he walks into the release Rock Bottom for two. Sister Abigail is countered into the Walls but Bray gets a rope (unlike in NXT where he tapped to the Walls years ago).

Bray goes to the middle rope so Jericho can hurricanrana him back down for a delayed two. I’m never a fan of people going up just so someone can hit them with a move. It’s a stretch of the suspension of disbelief. Bray spiders up and says that he can’t die because he is already dead. Jericho breaks his code for two and Bray slides outside where he smacks Jericho in the face, setting up Sister Abigail into the barricade. Back in and another Sister Abigail is enough to give Bray the pin.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t really feeling this one as it’s a match that Bray was supposed to win and then did. He was still trying to recover from the huge blow of losing the feud to Cena and losing the first match to Jericho really didn’t do him any favors. The match was nothing to see either as Jericho was starting to run on fumes again here. This would have been so much more effective if Jericho hadn’t won the first match.

Bray serenades us post match.

We recap Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon, which was a recap I needed when I watched this show live as the whole thing was such a mess. So Stephanie was all evil to Daniel Bryan, but Bryan is on the shelf with his neck injury so the feud was transferred over to Brie, because Brie and Bryan are totally the same thing.

Stephanie threatened to fire Brie but Brie quit first, leaving Stephanie to torture Nikki by putting her in handicap matches against such devastating forces as Alicia Fox, Rosa Mendes, Cameron and Eva Marie. Yes, this was really supposed to be intimidating. Brie and Stephanie sued each other over slapping each other because that’s what this feud needed. Then Brie offered to drop the charges in exchange for a match with Stephanie at Summerslam, because that’s how wrestling works.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Brie Bella

This is Stephanie’s first match in ten years and the announcers act like it’s Bruno vs. Hogan. We immediately get to the point as Stephanie comes out in something that looks like a superhero outfit with skin tight leather that shows off every inch of her figure. Oh and of course she throws the Four Horsewomen sign to Ronda Rousey and the other three women whose names no one knows (in the front row when Rousey was just starting to make noise as a big time star) because Stephanie is cool like that.

The announcers swoon over Stephanie like it’s Trish in 2000 and then give Brie a polite response. That’s the match right there: Brie looks good while Stephanie looks amazing and it’s entirely by design. Stephanie shoves Brie against the ropes to start and blows her a kiss. Brie gets back up and can barely do a lockup properly. Some shoulders in the corner have Brie in more trouble as the announcers try to act like Brie is some big physical threat while also pointing out that Stephanie has long legs.

The big slap is blocked though and the threat of a YES Lock sends Stephanie outside, likely out of fear due to how bad Brie made the hold look on Raw a few weeks back. Brie’s suicide dive is blocked by a forearm to the face and it’s Stephanie in control again. Stephanie talks trash and busts out a Hennig neck snap, drawing a YOU STILL GOT IT (shut up. Stephanie never had it in the ring in the first place. Think before you chant) and even more praise from the announcers.

Stephanie cranks on both arms as Brie has been on offense for all of fifteen seconds so far. An evil look that would make Edge jealous looks to set up….something, but Brie comes back with a Thesz press and the YES Kicks in the corner. Well close enough to them as she can’t get the timing right because the one spot that is going to get her a cheer is too complicated for her.

The middle rope dropkick gets two on Stephanie and Brie follows up with some of the absolute worst punches I have ever seen. I mean even Lita’s horrible punches (go back and watch her matches. She’s one of the most athletic women in wrestling history but she couldn’t throw a good punch to save her life) look great compared to these. HHH comes out but Nikki is here as well because those two are so equal. The Pedigree is countered into whatever Brie calls her imitation of the YES Lock because that’s not the hold her husband uses.

HHH pulls the referee out anyway, which shocks Cole for some reason. I have no idea why Cole is switching sides so fast because he’s spent the last ten minutes praising Stephanie. Brie baseball slides HHH and does the YES chant, only to have Nikki come in….and turn on Brie because that’s the least logical and worst idea they could go with for this story. Stephanie Pedigrees Brie for the pin.

Rating: D+. Where do I even start with this one? First and foremost: Brie Bella is a horrible wrestler. She’s a beautiful woman, she’s found the right look for herself with the ripped tights and shirt tied around her waist and she can clap on the floor, but she just does not have it in the ring. Some of the stuff in here was Eva Marie level work with those punches and the inability to do a lockup properly just being unforgivable.

On top of that, this is the wrong story. After the months and months of the Authority tormenting the Bellas, they win here in the end with Brie getting squashed until a quick comeback at the end, only to have it all taken away from her again so we can get to the Bella feud that no one other than the Total Divas producers wanted to see. Nikki turning on Brie would lead to the “I wish you died in the womb” nonsense that went on forever and was then just dropped, but I spent a three months ranting about that so I’ll cut myself off for now. Brie should have won here, no matter how bad she looked in the ring.

That gets us to the final point: this match was ALL about Stephanie. Brie was just the person in the ring to bounce off of her as Stephanie got to look great (both mechanically and physically. I know she gets a lot of flack, but Stephanie can rock some tight outfits) out there and even had the crowd cheering for her. That praise was well deserved though as Stephanie was as polished here as any Diva had been since probably Mickie James but, as is always the case, Stephanie has to look great and can’t get any comeuppance. In this case though, she deserves a lot of praise because this was one heck of a performance.

Some fan won a contest and got to make a character called Mama’s Boy, complete with some training. He even got to make an entrance at NXT, to the Hurricane’s old theme song for some reason. Eh cute enough.

Randy Orton vs. Roman Reigns

This is due to Reigns costing Orton a title shot and Reigns’ first big solo match. I like the blue trim on Reigns’ attire but it can be a bit distracting. Orton goes right at him to start and is quickly headbutted out to the floor. Some right hands and a clothesline put Orton outside again but he sends Reigns into the steps and takes it back inside for a chinlock. This isn’t exactly thrilling stuff so far. We hit the Garvin Stomp followed by a nice top rope superplex for two. I love a good superplex.

Back to the chinlock for a bit before Reigns counters into a rear naked choke of all things. See, why doesn’t he do stuff like that more often today? There’s more to life than clotheslines. Orton falls backwards to escape and we’re right back to the chinlock. Orton isn’t exactly giving Reigns much to work with here. The Samoan drop gives Roman a breather and he jacks Randy’s jaw to set up the apron kick. Lawler: “Reigns kicked the Kryptonite out of him!”

Orton whips him into the barricade to take over again though and drops him onto the announcers’ table to keep Roman in trouble. Back in again and Reigns punches his way back into it (shocking I know), followed by a super Samoan drop for two more. The Superman Punch knocks Orton silly but he counters the spear into one heck of a powerslam. That looked great.

The Orton DDT gets two but Reigns gets up for another Superman Punch, only to dive into the RKO for a very near fall. Randy is livid so he loads up the Punt, which is about the dumbest thing you can do against someone who uses the spear for a finisher. Well that’s how it should have ended but instead Reigns just moves away from the Punt and then the spear is good for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was supposed to be a huge turning point for Reigns’ career but it came off as just an ok match with some good moments. The first seven to eight minutes really dragged this down as the chinlocks took the crowd out of things. Now to their credit, Orton and Reigns were able to get them back later on but this needed some tweaks to really make it work. It’s Reigns’ biggest win yet but it really wasn’t anything great.

Long recap of John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar. The idea is Cena beat Lesnar two and a half years ago when Lesnar returned, but since then Lesnar has reached his full Beast Mode and is the unstoppable monster. Cena is pretty clearly a fill in for the injured Daniel Bryan, who would have made for a better story here. They really aren’t hiding the fact that Lesnar is going to win the title here but you know Cena isn’t going down without a fight.

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Cena is defending of course. They do the big staredown across the ring before the bell and we get one of my favorite Cole lines: “It’s the biggest fight of the summer.” I know that was the tagline going into this match but I love his delivery there. Before we get started, awesome sign in the crowd: “Cena wins, we logically discuss on Twitter.” Cena charges right at him but gets taken down to the mat…..and the F5 connects at thirty seconds. I actually screamed “NO WAY! NO WAY!” when I saw that for the first time.

Lesnar shouts that Cena just had his one chance and I think everyone in the building believes him. Cena looks totally out of it and we’re 90 seconds into this. The first release German suplex sends Cena flying and the fans are just stunned. German #2 has Cena’s mouth hanging open and the replay makes it look even worse. Cena wildly swings but only hits the mat.

A quick drive into the corner and some shots to the ribs just annoy Lesnar as he knees Cena to the mat and slaps on a chinlock so Cena can remember what planet he’s on. More punches from Cena are stopped by a knee as this is even more dominant than I remembered. Four more Germans (six total, counting a snap that I didn’t mention) have Cena a crippled mass in the middle of the ring. Lesnar drives even more knees into the ribs and pulls Cena up so he can throw another German.

The referee FINALLY checks on Cena, who says he’ll have two eggs and sausage. John goes flying off another German but elbows out of the next and gets in some right hands and a clothesline, followed by an AA for two. That seems like Cena’s last gasp though and he can’t follow up. Lesnar does the Undertaker sit up…..and starts laughing. He tells Cena to get out of the corner and bring it on while bouncing back and forth on his feet. Cena charges and gets taken down and pounded in the head.

Cena can’t even move on the mat but tells the referee to let it keep going. Lesnar is ticked off at Cena not quitting so he rolls four straight German suplexes, earning what sounds like applause. He still won’t quit, so there are three more rolling Germans. With Brock standing over him, Cena sweeps the leg and puts on the STF but Brock rolls over and just unloads on him with right hands. The F5 finally ends the slaughter and gives Brock the title.

Rating: A+. This was hard to watch. Not hard in the WCW or TNA hard to watch way, but in the “that’s enough, stop this before Cena dies” hard to watch way. This was a complete squash that ran 16:14. In that span of time, and this is being VERY generous at times, Cena was on offense for 1:22. That’s including the opening where they were grappling on the mat and the time where Cena was trying to break Brock’s grip.

Above all else though, this match did what it was supposed to do, which is make Brock Lesnar look like the biggest monster this side of Godzilla. This wasn’t a technical masterpiece or anything, but the fact that it got this kind of emotion out of me is doing something right. Outstanding performance and Cena selling so well made it even better.

Cena is checked on and can’t move to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Something occurred to me as I was getting ready for this show: I didn’t remember anything about it other than the main event. I can tell you the main event for all of the big four shows and every In Your House off the top of my head, but I had no idea that Orton and Reigns had a match here. Looking back, it’s easy to see why. Other than Lesnar vs. Cena, nothing on here is anything outside of the average range. Almost all of the redo ratings are in the middle of the pack and nothing else is memorable. It’s a watchable show, but totally forgettable, which isn’t something you should say about Summerslam.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

Original: C

Redo: C-

AJ Lee vs. Paige

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

Original: C+

Redo: C

Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B

Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Chris Jericho

Original: C

Redo: C-

Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton

Original: C

Redo: B-

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Original: A-

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: C+

……what? I mean just…..what? That overall rating doesn’t even make bad sense. Other than Brie vs. Stephanie and maybe Orton vs. Reigns, nothing really changed drastically, but it went from great to above average? I REALLY got into that Lesnar vs. Cena match the first time around. That original rating actually made my eyes bug out when I read it to see what I had originally given the show.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/08/17/summerslam-2014-on-the-a-list/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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