Monday Night Raw – February 18, 2008: Target Acquired

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 18, 2008
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

No Way Out is out of the way and now we have a clear path to Wrestlemania XXIV in just over a month. It’s time to start the build and the good thing is you can probably see a few of the matches from here. As for this week, Vince McMahon gets to face Hornswoggle in a cage, because this story is still going. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

Here is new #1 contender HHH to get things going. HHH talks about how happy he is, because last year he was getting ready to go watch Wrestlemania from a wheelchair backstage. Well now he is back where he belongs and he is going to become a 12 time World Champion, but here is (still WWE Champion) Randy Orton to interrupt. Orton says this title reign started with HHH, who he beat to become the champion. Four years ago, HHH was jealous of Orton because Orton was that much better.

Cue John Cena to interrupt as well because he wants to wait a cotton picking minute (Cena: “Yeah I went there.”). Cena accuses Orton of losing his way into Wrestlemania so tonight, let’s have a rematch for the title with the winner facing HHH. Orton appeals to HHH, who doesn’t really care who he faces at Wrestlemania.

Cue William Regal to say HHH is going to Wrestlemania no matter what, but tonight Orton will face Cena….in a non-title match. If Cena wins, he moves on to the main event of Wrestlemania in a triple threat match. HHH isn’t cool with that because he has already earned his shot, but Regal makes it more interesting: HHH can be guest referee for Orton vs. Cena. This was shorter than I would have expected to come up with something like that.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Snitsky

Snitsky shoves him down without much trouble to start and there’s the boot choke in the corner. Hardy isn’t having that and sends him into the corner for the slingshot dropkick. A big boot puts Snitsky on the floor in a crash and we take a break. Back with Hardy caught in a bearhug and then getting shouldered down hard. Three elbows give Snitsky two and we hit a crossface choke (minus the arm trap).

Snitsky lets that go and misses a big leg, allowing Hardy to hit the Whisper in the Wind for two. The Twist of Fate is blocked and a big boot drops Hardy for two more. The pumphandle slam is loaded up but Hardy reverses into the Twist of Fate. That’s enough to set up the Swanton to send Hardy to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C+. A smaller hero vs. a monster is something that will always work and they had it going well here. That is all you need in a lot of cases and Hardy being one of the most popular stars in the company helps a lot. They had a perfectly fine story here and Hardy knows exactly how to do a match like this one. Nice job.

Mike Adamle brings out Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn gets right to the point: the greatest wrestler of all time and the man who inspired him to get into wrestling is going into the WWE Hall Of Fame. The fans give a WOO and we see the Ric Flair Hall of Fame video. Your mileage on Flair may vary, but I don’t think this is anything resembling a controversial pick.

Paul Burchill vs. Super Crazy

Katie Lea is here with Burchill (who gets a PAUL THE PIRATE chant) and we get an inset promo where they talk about how attractive the other is. Burchill strikes away to start and curb stomps Crazy for the very fast pin. Total dominance.

Randy Orton comes in to see HHH and hints at an alliance, but HHH says he’s only going to do things that favor him.

We look at Big Show returning last night to attack Rey Mysterio, with Floyd Mayweather Jr. making the save and breaking Show’s nose.

Here is Big Show for a chat. Show was asked to come out here and apologize for what happened last night. He will apologize, even though he thinks Mayweather should apologize. Show asks Mayweather to come out here in person, so cue Mayweather with about six other people behind him.

Mayweather says he has been a WWE fan for many years and he’s sorry things went that way last night. He was called out and had to retaliate. Show says he was just trying to get some publicity and apologizes. They shake hands and Mayweather leaves in peace….but Show says hang on a minute.

Show wants to get something off his chest: the only way Mayweather could hurt him was on his knees and he was STILL bigger than Mayweather. The truth is Show could take him out in two minutes and the challenge is on. Mayweather, and entourage, come back to the ring and sure let’s do it. The tease of a right hand makes Show back up but Mayweather leaves. I think I know where this is going.

Video on Money in the Bank.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Mr. Kennedy vs. Val Venis

Kennedy, with new music, sends Venis shoulder first into the post to start and goes after the arm on the mat. The armbar goes on as JR is smart enough to say that Venis is recently back from elbow surgery. Back up and the Mic Check sends Kennedy to Wrestlemania in a hurry.

Vince McMahon vs. Hornswoggle

In a cage. Finlay comes to the ring and wants to fight for Hornswoggle but is told to get out. Cue JBL to slam the cage door on the back of Finlay’s head and then handcuff him to the top rope. Vince pulls out a belt and whips Hornswoggle as Finlay can’t do anything. Vince leaves and JBL throws Hornswoggle into the cage.

Finlay tells JBL to beat him up instead but Hornswoggle gets kicked in the head. The fall away slam into the cage leaves Hornswoggle laying and even Vince says that’s enough as JBL leaves. This was more intense than I would have bet on, with commentary being silent making it better. No match of course.

Here are Santino Marella and Maria for a chat. We get a poll on if Maria should pose for Playboy, with 94% saying yes. I know it’s a popular concept, but maybe you should wait a bit after such a serious moment? Anyway Santino announces that Maria is posing but Beth cuts him off for a match that Maria didn’t seem to know what was coming. Hold on though as Santino reads the fine print: no Playboy unless Maria wins here!

Beth Phoenix vs. Maria

Non-title and Beth slams her down with ease to start. Cue the returning Candice Michelle for a distraction though and Maria grabs a rollup. There was no way to do this without pinning the unstoppable champion?

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Non-title but if Cena wins, the Raw World Title match at Wrestlemania is a triple threat, also involving guest referee HHH. Cena backs him into the corner to start but Orton scores with an uppercut. A dropkick has Cena out on the apron and Orton knocks him into the announcers’ table as we take a break.

Back with Cena getting a boot up in the corner and dropping an elbow for a fast two. Orton is right back up and a hanging DDT gets two on Cena, followed by the snap powerslam for the same. The circle stomps set up a jumping knee to the head for two more and frustration is setting in.

We hit the chinlock so Cena is up fast, only to miss a charge into the corner as he still can’t keep anything going. Cena shrugs off a ran into the buckle and initiates the finishing sequence but Orton grabs the rope to block the FU. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps but the RKO is countered into the STFU. The rope is grabbed so Cena yells at HHH, only to duck a cheap shot from Orton. A quick FU sends Cena to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C+. So there’s one of your Wrestlemania main events as you knew the ending to Orton vs. Cena last night was going to wind up going somewhere. Cena being added to the match does add something fresh to the whole thing, but this wasn’t exactly a classic. The match felt big, but another champion gets pinned, albeit with some shenanigans.

HHH Pedigrees both of them and poses with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’ve got a feeling this is going to be the start of the Wrestlemania season trend, as there was very little here in the way of wrestling. Instead, this was ALL about setting up Wrestlemania in one form or another. I can go for that, as they don’t have very long before Wrestlemania and the rapid fire build has begun. Good enough stuff here, but it’s all about the future.

 

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No Way Out 2008 (2022 Redo): The Focus Shifts

No Way Out 2008
Date: February 17, 2008
Location: Thomas & Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 15,240
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re on the Road To Wrestlemania and in this case, WWE is embracing the more is more philosophy. We have a pair of Elimination Chamber matches with the winners going on to the World Title matches at Wrestlemania. In addition, we have John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title, which should feel quite big. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the Road To Wrestlemania going into a place that has no way out. We shift into a traditional Chamber video, as it continues to seem almost sentient given the descriptions.

We recap CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the ECW World Title. Guerrero cheated to beat Punk so Punk threw him in the Gulf of Mexico and is using his rematch here. As all great feuds go.

ECW World Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending and slaps him in the face to start, earning himself a kick to the head. Punk gets sent outside and tripped face first onto the apron to put him in some early trouble. Back in and Chavo hits a suplex, thankfully without an Eddie reference. A bodyscissors (you don’t see that one very often) is countered into a catapult but Punk’s GTS is countered into a hurricanrana.

Punk kicks him into the head and goes into the Eddie Dance/Three Amigos, which is pretty soundly booed, even to the point of the crowd chanting for Chavo in a weird moment. Another kick puts Chavo on the floor so Punk puts him on top. The super hurricanrana is blocked though and a frog splash retains the title.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but this feud needs to wrap up already. There is nothing left for these two to do to each other and this was a pretty clear ending. Chavo needs a fresh challenger and there is nothing left for Punk to do in ECW. Punk is going to be fine moving forward, but I’m not sure who can go after Chavo right now.

We look back at Rey Mysterio hitting a springboard seated senton on Vickie Guerrero this week on Smackdown.

Mysterio said it was an accident but he isn’t apologizing to Vickie. Oh and he has a torn bicep but is wrestling anyway. Floyd Mayweather Jr. comes in for a pep talk, though the fans don’t seem impressed.

The Chamber is lowered.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali vs. Big Daddy V vs. MVP vs. Finlay vs. Batista

For the Smackdown World Title shot at Wrestlemania (and MVP’s US Title isn’t on the line) and inside the Elimination Chamber. Batista is in at #1 and Undertaker is in at #2 so they’re certainly starting big. They slug it out (duh) to start until Batista gets him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. That earns him a right hand over the ropes and it’s time to go fight on the steel. A face rake across the steel fires Batista up enough to knock Undertaker back inside, where Undertaker chokes in the corner. Undertaker stomps him down but an exchange of big boots gives us a double knockdown.

Big Daddy V is in at #3 to slam both of them down a few times. A headbutt knocks Undertaker out of the Chamber (that’s a new one) and he seems to be favoring his arm as a running splash against the wall crushes Undertaker back inside. Batista manages a spinebuster to V and Undertaker adds a DDT onto the Chamber to get rid of V (as pinfalls are now legal outside of the ring).

Great Khali is in at #4 and strikes away as the fans decide that the wrestler who is currently wrestling can’t wrestle. The chokebomb gets two on Undertaker and there’s the Vice Grip to Batista. With that broken up, Undertaker boots Batista in the face and chokes Khali out for the elimination. Undertaker rakes Batista against the cage until Finlay is in at #5. A missed big boot in the corner lets Finlay Celtic Cross Undertaker for two. Coach: “How is the Undertaker doing this?” Cole: “He’s the Undertaker.”

Finlay sends Undertaker into the cage wall for two but Undertaker knocks the other two down. MVP is in at #6….or at least he should be, as he stays in the pod. That’s not going to work for Undertaker, who drags him back in as Batista is up again. MVP uses a chain to knock down the monsters and Undertaker is busted open. Back up and Undertaker talks MVP to the top of the pod, where a super chokeslam brings him crashing back down. Finlay steals the pin to get rid of MVP and we’re down to three.

Undertaker misses a top rope elbow to Finlay though and here’s Hornswoggle to throw in a shillelagh. The shot to the head gets two on Batista but Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam onto the steel to Finlay for the elimination. Believe it or not, we come down to Batista vs. Undertaker for the title shot and they both have to pull themselves up. Batista is busted open as well and the big slugout is on with Batista hitting a quick Namesake Bomb for two.

For some reason Batista sees no problem with hammering down right hands in the corner, meaning the Last Ride gets two. Undertaker hammers away but gets clotheslined over the top and onto the steel. Batista follows as Undertaker seems to be favoring his arm so Batista tries a ram into the barricade. It’s just try because Undertaker blocks the contact and hits a Tombstone for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. There were two options here so this got a lot more interesting once they got rid of the people who were there to fill in spots. Big Daddy V. and Great Khali were never going to be any kind of a serious threat, but unfortunately the US Champion isn’t anything resembling a threat here. Undertaker vs. Batista was good enough, but they went smart by keeping that part short. Solid enough match here, though it could have used a third potential winner, if there is such a thing on Smackdown these days.

Edge wants the Edgeheads ready to help him with Rey Mysterio, but Teddy Long comes in to ban them from ringside for the title match.

Maria and Ashley are at the Playboy Mansion in an effort to get Maria to pose. I’m sure that is still up in the air at this point.

Ric Flair vs. Mr. Kennedy

Flair is coming in with a bad knee. Kennedy shoulders him down and mocks the strut so Flair hits a chop and shows him how it’s done. That’s enough for Kennedy to smarten up and go after the knee to take over. The half crab goes on and a rather swearing Flair makes the rope, meaning Kennedy puts on the Figure Four around the post. The regular Figure Four stays on the leg but the rope is grabbed again. Back up and a Regal Roll gives Kennedy two but Flair is back with some chop blocks. Flair gets the real Figure Four on and Kennedy taps rather quickly.

Rating: C-. That felt like it could have been on a house show and that is rarely a good sign on TV. Flair gets to keep going and I don’t know if there was much doubt about him losing at No Way Out. They had put together a pretty nice feud on the way here but then the match was just kind of there. I’m actually a bit disappointed for once and that’s not something I was expecting from this one.

Finlay is getting his back worked on when Vince McMahon comes in and promises violence to Hornswoggle tomorrow.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Edge retained the title with help from Vickie Guerrero at the Royal Rumble so the rematch was set. Vickie was taken out on Smackdown, but it might not matter as Rey has a torn bicep, meaning this might not be so great.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge is defending and the Edgeheads are barred from ringside. Rey backs into the corner as Edge certainly knows about the bad arm. A hurricanrana sends Edge into the corner and Rey has to use left handed punches which has to be so awkward. Edge shrugs them off and takes Rey outside for a whip into the steps. Back in and Edge slowly hammers away before a headscissors sends him down for a crotching against the post. A left arm DDT gives Rey two and the 619 connects but the arm gives out. Rey’s springboard is speared out of the air to retain the title fast.

Rating: C. I can’t possibly put this one on them as Rey could barely do anything. They went just over five minutes and that was probably agony throughout. It’s better than no match and they did play into the arm injury to make sense. Rey is probably going to be gone for a long time but he certainly tried on his way out.

Post match Edge leaves and….here is the returning Big Show, for the first time in over a year. Show is glad to be back and says he’ll be a champion again on Raw, Smackdown or ECW. He’s been champion at all of those places and he’ll do it again, but he isn’t here to make guarantees. Since he’s been gone he’s lost 108lbs and now he is a lot meaner. To show this, he goes outside and grabs Rey by the throat while taunting Floyd Mayweather Jr. at ringside.

Mayweather jumps the barricade and gets inside, with security and his entourage right behind him. Show drops to his knee in front of Mayweather, who fires off some crazy fast punches to bust Show’s nose. Mayweather sprints off and Show gives chase, with Shane McMahon of all people having to calm him down. Show leaves, unfortunately not asking Shane “which way did he go”. So there’s your Wrestlemania celebrity match.

Mike Adamle throws us to the recap video for Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title against John Cena. Back in October, Cena got hurt and had to forfeit the title, which Orton somehow got twice in one night. Cena then returned at the Royal Rumble and won the whole thing, but is cashing in his title match here instead of at Wrestlemania (which apparently you can just do).

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is challenging and we even get an old school weapons check. An early small package has Orton a bit nervous and Cena rolls him up for two more to make it worse. The fans are a bit split here as Orton knocks him down and starts the stomping. More stomping puts Cena down in the corner and the referee is actually asking if he wants to give up. Does he not get the whole Cena thing?

Cena hits a bulldog and drops an elbow for two but Orton cuts him off with a clothesline for the same. The fans are split again as Orton punches him out to the apron, only to get caught with the top rope Fameasser for two. The FU is countered into an uppercut (which looked like an RKO setup) and there’s the circle stomp. We hit the chinlock until Cena powers up and initiates the finishing sequence. Orton slips out of the FU again though and bails to the floor.

Back in and Orton grabs the backbreaker before avoiding another Cena top rope Fameasser. Instead Cena grabs the ProtoBomb into the STFU, with Orton having to bail to the ropes. That’s enough to send Orton bailing to the floor, where he grabs his knee and demands a countout. Cena won’t be having that and walks right into the RKO on the floor. Cena beats the count back in….so Orton hits the referee for the DQ escape.

Rating: B-. The ending was there to set up the rematch, as I don’t think anyone is going to buy that Cena’s big moment is coming at No Way Out. It seems ripe for the setup of another match, with Orton getting rather annoyed at his plan not working. The match was good as expected between these two, but the ending might as well have been a To Be Continued sign.

Post match Cena grabs the STFU to choke Orton out.

HHH and Shawn Michaels are going to be cool with each other no matter what happens in the Chamber.

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Umaga vs. JBL vs. Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

For the Raw World Title shot at Wrestlemania and Hardy’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Jericho is in at #1 and Shawn is in at #2, which should make for a nice four minutes. Feeling out process to start before they go with the hard chops into a pinfall reversal sequence. Jericho cuts it off with a clothesline so Shawn hits one of his own. The top rope elbow only hits Jericho’s raised knees but manages to block the Walls. Back up and the collide, with Umaga coming in at #3.

A double clothesline takes both heroes down and Umaga makes it even worse with a double Samoan drop. Shawn gets kicked out onto the steel but Jericho avoids a middle rope headbutt. That lets Shawn go up for the top rope elbow to the back and Jericho grabs the logical Walls. Shawn adds a Crossface but it’s JBL in at #4 to break it up for whatever reason. Some kicks to the face (including Shawn’s bloody one) have the good guys in trouble and Umaga gets up to help JBL with the beatdown (a JBL/Umaga alliance seems odd as Umaga with money would be….weird).

HHH is in at #5 and goes after everyone not named Shawn. A DDT gets two on JBL and Umaga is sent head first (and HARD) into the pod. The Clothesline From JBL drops HHH but Jericho Codebreakers JBL for the pin. Hold on though as JBL grabs a chair and knocks Jericho/HHH/Umaga silly, with Jericho being busted open.

Jeff Hardy is in at #6 to complete the field and starts fast by mule kicking Umaga into the corner. A Whisper in the Wind drops HHH and Shawn but Umaga is back up to knock Hardy down. The swinging release Rock Bottom plants Jericho before hitting a SCARY running hip attack to drive him through the pod. Somehow Jericho isn’t in multiple pieces as it’s a superkick into a Codebreaker into a Pedigree into a Swanton off the top of the pod to Umaga for the pin.

Then Shawn superkicks Hardy to give Jericho the pin, only to have HHH Pedigree Shawn to get us down to Hardy vs. HHH. Hardy starts fast with a DDT onto the steel and a backdrop sends HHH back inside. The Swanton misses though and a Pedigree gets….two. Ok that was a surprise. HHH grabs a chair but has to counter a Twist of Fate. That’s enough to set up the Pedigree onto the chair to finish Hardy (and kill the crowd) for the Wrestlemania title shot.

Rating: B+. This was a good bit better than the first one as it had more violence, better action, more plausible winners (Shawn and Jericho weren’t winning, but they were more likely than MVP and Finlay) and a better pace. HHH winning isn’t a surprise, but dang Hardy was over here and that was a pretty bad loss. The fans going quiet after the pin didn’t help, but like HHH wasn’t going to get his big win at some point.

Overall Rating: B. Obviously this show was all about the Chambers and Orton vs. Cena, all of which worked pretty well. There isn’t much on the rest of the show, but you can see a lot of Wrestlemania from here so they got the important stuff right. This wasn’t a show built around a bunch of small stuff but rather three big things, which is quite the shift, especially so soon after the Royal Rumble. You can see Wrestlemania from here though and that is a good thing to see.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – February 11, 2008: On The Roll Again

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 11, 2008
Location: Frank Irwin Center, Austin, Texas
Attendance: 13,552
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for No Way Out and the second show in a double taping as the roster is are on an Asian tour. The pay per view card is all but set and I’m not sure what else we are going to see on this show that is going to make it that much better. HHH still won’t be here again this week though and that should drag things down a bit, though it could be interesting to see who picks up the slack. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Of note: a graphic says that the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show will be airing on CNBC. As someone who was devastated when that took Raw’s place near my birthday every year, I can’t help but smile.

Vince McMahon vs. Hornswoggle

No DQ and Finlay is banned from ringside. Vince, who does look a bit intimidating in his fighting gear, shoves him down without much trouble to start. Even Vince is willing to have a heart though and he lets Hornswoggle get in a free slap. After a delay, Hornswoggle manages to do it, which is enough for Vince to pull out his belt. Cue Finlay to get in Vince’s way so Vince threatens to fire him. That’s a major threat to Finlay, who has a wife and kids of his own. Finlay goes to leave but then knocks Vince cold with the shillelagh. Hornswoggle goes to leave but drops a Tadpole Splash for the pin in a nice moment.

Rating: C. This was more or less an angle instead of a match as the only moves were a slap and a splash. The story has long since lost its luster and could use an endgame of some kind, but I’m not sure what that could be. I can’t picture Vince vs. Finlay being interesting so unless they want to pull a surprise trigger, this could be in search of a finish for a good while.

Post break Vince gets his head looked at until William Regal comes in to check on him. Tonight, Vince is going to fire Finlay.

Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Royal Rumble rematch. They fight over a lockup to start until JBL misses a big boot, allowing Jericho to slug away with forearms. Jericho kicks him in the ribs and rips at the face but it’s too early for the Walls. There’s a baseball slide to send JBL outside but he goes evil with a thumb to the eye. For some reason that doesn’t work on Jericho, who is back with a spinwheel kick for a breather.

We take a break and come back with JBL hitting a rather hard clothesline, setting up the sleeper. Jericho fights up and knocks him down, including a top rope clothesline for two. The middle dropkick gets the same and Jericho counters the fall away slam into a DDT for another near fall. Back up and Jericho charges into a boot in the corner, only to duck a clothesline and grab the Codebreaker for the pin.

Rating: C+. They kept this short enough that it didn’t overexpose JBL as being fairly boring in the ring. Jericho got the pin to probably wrap up the feud that was only so good in the first place. Other than that, it gives Jericho a boost going into the Elimination Chamber, where he is probably the third favorite for the match.

Post match, Umaga comes in and Samoan Spikes both of them.

Mike Adamle throws us to a video on John Cena vs. Randy Orton.

William Regal has a group of men ready to beat Finlay up and drag him to Vince for his firing. Vince has a better idea: a cage match with Hornswoggle next week!

Paul Burchill vs. Brian Kendrick

This is Burchill’s return after about two years away and his sister Katie Lea is with him. Before the match, the Burchill’s seem rather….fond of one another. Paul works on the arm to start as JR again plugs the dog show. Kendrick armdrags him into an armbar but a Katie distraction lets Paul take over. One heck of a stomp sets up a rolling cutter to finish Kendrick. Just a step above a squash, but Katie was more impressive than Paul.

John Cena vs. Mark Henry

Randy Orton is on commentary. Cena charges into the World’s Strongest Slam fifteen seconds in and Henry knocks him into the corner. Some rights and lefts don’t do much for Cena as Henry is right back with a full nelson. That’s broken up and Henry misses a charge into the corner, setting up a middle rope shoulder into the STFU to give Cena the fast tap.

Post match Cena tells Orton that he is 100% heading into No Way Out so Orton better be ready. Cena would never lie about an injury status.

Wrestlemania is coming, complete with Red Hot Chili Peppers theme.

Here is Mr. Kennedy to see if Ric Flair wants to forfeit their No Way Out match. Cue Flair, to tell Kennedy a story. Flair: “Before you were born….” Kennedy: “Oh here we go.” Flair talks about how he and his generation paved the road for people like Kennedy so he isn’t forfeiting. Sure Kennedy has a great future, but he wants to do once what Flair has done sixteen times. Flair is coming to No Way Out and goes to leave, but Kennedy kicks him in the bad leg and mocks the strut. This match is getting a far better build than I would have expected.

Melina vs. Maria

Jillian Hall and Santino Marella are here too, with the latte joining commentary. Maria starts fast with a scorpion kick but Melina knocks her right back down. Back up and Maria screams a lot before hitting a clothesline. Melina gets dropped throat first on the top and a bulldog makes it worse, but Jillian kisses Santino. That’s enough for Melina to grab a rollup for the cheap pin.

Post match, Santino begs forgiveness and talks about what happens to WWE women who do Playboy. Therefore, she has one week to decide between Playboy and him. Santino kisses her and leaves.

No Way Out rundown.

Video on HHH.

Candice Michelle is coming back.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shawn Michaels

Non-title and this should be good. Hardy starts fast with a backslide for two before sending him outside. The dive misses so Shawn slaps him in the face before they go back inside. A headlock takeover puts Shawn down and a belly to back suplex gives Hardy two as the fast start continues. Shawn fights up and elbows him into the corner for the chops, only to get headlock takeovered again.

Back up and Hardy gets sent over the top for some cat skinning, so Shawn hits a slightly harder than expected clothesline. Hardy is fine enough to mule kick Shawn to the floor for the baseball slide but Shawn powerslams him out of the air. We take a break and come back with Hardy favoring his back, as you might have expected. There’s a hard whip into the corner and Michaels drives some knees into the back to make it worse. The bow and arrow goes on Hardy until he elbows his way to freedom.

Back up and they slug it out until Shawn grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two. The half crab goes on to stay on Hardy’s back, sending Hardy to the rope. Hardy avoids a charge to send Shawn shoulder first into the post but Shawn is fine enough to knock him off the top. The elbow misses though and the Whisper in the Wind gives Hardy two as JR is getting WAY into this.

Shawn is back up with the forearm into the nipup and now the top rope elbow can connect. The superkick misses so Shawn goes for his weird reverse figure four, sending Hardy to the rope again. Another superkick misses and it’s the Twist of Fate into the Swanton to give Hardy the big win.

Rating: B+. That was a pay per view quality match that got the time and gave Hardy one of the biggest wins of his career. On top of that it was a completely clean finish, which you don’t see very often in a spot like this. Hardy is on a roll going into the Chamber, though he was on a roll going into the Royal Rumble match with Orton and that didn’t turn out so well for him. For now though, great match.

Overall Rating: B. This was another weird show, but the double taping thing probably explains a lot of the setup. We had a heck of a main event and another pretty good one in JBL vs. Jericho, plus the Vince stuff was short. No Way Out needs to get out of the way already so we can move on to Wrestlemania, but the go home show was an improvement over recent weeks.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – February 4, 2008: Needs More Filler

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 4, 2008
Location: Frank Irwin Center, Austin, Texas
Attendance: 13,552
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So we are firmly into the build for No Way Out, which will feature John Cena challenging Randy Orton for the Raw World Title, plus an Elimination Chamber match for the Raw World Title shot at Wrestlemania. Thankfully we’re only getting the build toward one Elimination Chamber match, which should fill in most of this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Randy Orton is in the ring to start things off and it looks like we’ve got a contract signing. Orton recaps the setup of his title match with John Cena at No Way Out, which is Cena’s Royal Rumble title shot. That’s not good enough for Orton though, which is why he wants a contract signed so Cena has no way out. Orton’s lawyers have already signed the contract and he has signed it, so get Cena out here to sign it too.

After a quick walk through the back, here is Cena to quite the ovation. Cena wastes no time in signing and Orton is rather pleased, because the match is on no matter what happens to Cena, including in his arm wrestling match with Mark Henry tonight. Cue Henry for a distraction so the RKO can lay Cena out. They certainly didn’t waste time here.

Post break, Henry and Orton deny planning anything in advance. Violence is promised for later tonight.

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix/Victoria

Kelly goes after Victoria to start and manages a backslide, which has commentary far too impressed. Mickie comes in to go after Beth but gets pulled off the top, which might be a knee injury. A guillotine works a bit better for Mickie but Beth powers her into the corner. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits a tornado DDT to finish Victoria.

Mickie wants the title.

William Regal tells Hornswoggle to get ready to join Vince McMahon’s special club. Regal: “I’m in it!”

Here is Shawn Michaels, with JR saying HHH isn’t here tonight due to a family emergency. Shawn talks about how close he got to winning the WWE Title last year at Wrestlemania but he doesn’t want to be second place. He is ready to go back this year so everyone in the Elimination Chamber is on notice. Shawn: “Friend, family and Umaga….whatever he is, he’s on notice too!”

Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt to say he respects Shawn and how much he loved their Wrestlemania match. But then Shawn suggested he is going to win the Elimination Chamber and that’s too far. Jericho has been inside the Chamber three times and knows what it takes to make it to the main event of Wrestlemania. Cue Jeff Hardy to interrupt to say that he’ll be going to the main event of Wrestlemania for the first time.

Now it’s JBL interrupting to say he gets what he wants. He has bought Umaga to get him to the main event of Wrestlemania….so here is Umaga to interrupt. After staring down the good guys, Umaga turns to JBL and backs him into the corner, which brings out Snitsky, to say the other five have had their chances. Fans: “BRUSH YOUR TEETH!”

Shawn doesn’t care for threats and mocks Snitsky’s teeth before hitting him in the face. The brawl is on and we probably have a six man for later. Indeed as William Regal comes out to make the six man tag. This took a long time to get to the point and was mainly there to get all six of the Elimination Chamber participants out there.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Super Crazy

Kennedy dropkicks the knee out to start and hammers away at the leg. The knee is twisted back and then around the post but Crazy uses the free leg to kick Kennedy in the head. That’s broken up and Kennedy grabs…kind of an inverted Figure Four for the fast tap. At least the hold was different than just a copy of Flair’s Figure Four.

Post match Kennedy shows us a clip of MVP taking out Ric Flair’s knee last week on Smackdown. Therefore, Kennedy is giving Flair a chance to come here next week and forfeit the No Way Out match and save his leg. They’re taking a different path to Kennedy vs. Flair and it’s more interesting than I would have thought.

Mike Adamle hypes up the Raw Elimination Chamber.

Video on the Chamber itself.

Carlito/Santino Marella vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Maria is here with Carlito and Marella. Kendrick dropkicks Carlito for a fast two but Marella low bridges him to the floor. London chases Marella around the ring, leaving Carlito to hit a Backstabber to finish Kendrick. Remember when London and Kendrick were one of the best teams in the company?

Vince McMahon is preparing for Hornswoggle to join his, ahem, special club. This involves a, quote, “Professional a** buffer” and “a** cream”. Vince: “Mr. McMahon’s a** in HD!”

Here’s Vince to humiliate Hornswoggle again. He talks about how you can’t reason with a child, so you have to discipline them. After ranting about children in the audience, Vince says you have to literally make them kiss your a**. Cue Hornswoggle, who Vince blames for the whole thing and it’s going to hurt Vince more than him.

Vince drops his pants and asks for a pardon of the tan lines. Hornswoggle goes to kiss it but Vince demands that he kiss it (that felt like a missed cue). Cue Finlay to ask what is wrong with Vince, who threatens a firing. Actually, Finlay can kiss it instead, but Hornswoggle gives it a bite. That doesn’t work for Vince, who makes himself vs. Hornswoggle next week, No DQ, and if Finlay interferes, he’s fired. This was WAY longer than any segment involving Vince not wearing pants should have been.

Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Trevor Murdoch/Lance Cade

Non-title. Holly elbows Murdoch down to start so it’s off to Cade to run Holly over right back. That doesn’t last long and Cody comes in with a top rope ax handle, setting up a bulldog. Everything breaks down and Cody DDTs Murdoch for the pin.

Post match Carlito and Santino Marella come out to challenge for the titles. Egads that’s a rough time for the belts.

No Way Out rundown.

Shawn Michaels/Jeff Hardy/Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield/Snitsky/Umaga

Shawn and Umaga start things off with Shawn’s chops having no effect. Umaga misses a sitdown splash so Jericho comes in and gets headbutted down without much trouble. It’s off to Snitsky to miss a big boot, allowing Jericho to triangle dropkick him out to the floor. Hardy comes in (big reaction for that) and gets slammed by Snitsky, allowing JBL to pound away.

A hard shoulder drops Hardy but Snitsky comes in and allows the tag off to Shawn. Something like an Indian Deathlock has Snitsky in trouble but everything breaks down. The good guys hit triple dives and we take a break with the fans sounding rather enthusiastic. Back with Jericho in trouble and getting caught in the wrong corner.

Umaga grabs a bearhug before hitting the Samoan drop for two. Jericho tries to fight out but gets kicked in the back to cut him right back down. An enziguri gives Jericho a breather though and the hot tag brings in Hardy to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Twist of Fate into the Swanton finishes Snitsky.

Rating: C+. Pretty standard, long form six man here with Hardy winning for the feel good moment. Hardy is going to be the fan favorite in the Chamber and giving him some momentum on the way there is the right thing to do. The fans wanted to see him do anything here and it’s not like Jericho and Shawn need to pin Snitsky. Basic six man formula here and it worked just fine.

And now, arm wrestling between John Cena and Mark Henry. As expected, Henry takes forever to start and gets in a cheap shot on Cena’s recently injured chest. They go, Henry is about to win, Cena is about to win, Randy Orton runs in to jump Cena. The RKO and AA are blocked and Orton runs, leaving Cena to AA Henry to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a weird show as they had two stories, with the Elimination Chamber stuff and John Cena vs. Randy Orton. That filled in part of the show, but there wasn’t much else to fill in time other than those two stories. Unfortunately the other big story was Vince/Hornswoggle and….yeah that was as Vince of a segment as you could have had. No Way Out is all but set and that has me wondering how bad things are going to go next week when they don’t have much to say. For now though, it was just an ok show without much to fill in the gaps between the big stuff.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – January 28, 2008: The Hardy Drop

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 28, 2008
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The Royal Rumble has come and gone and that means it is time to start the Road To Wrestlemania. Randy Orton retained the Raw World Title over Jeff Hardy last night, but the big story is the return of John Cena, who is back months ahead of schedule and wont he Royal Rumble. That means Cena is going to be coming for Orton sooner than later so let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

Royal Rumble recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. Cena is a bit more serious than usual and says he knows this town is always going to tell him the truth. He is here tonight to answer a question that has been on everyone’s mind: how could this be possible? Back in October he suffered a major injury….and we pause for a CENA SUCKS chant. Cena: “Right now, that’s music to my ears.” Cena was supposed to be out for a year and that meant no Wrestlemania.

Some things have changed around here and in a hospital bed, he made a decision that would change everything. Now he is back for one chance just to maybe get an opportunity to go to Wrestlemania. Maybe it was luck, but he stands before you the winner of the Royal Rumble and he is going to Wrestlemania. Unless of course the people here would like to see Wrestlemania…..tonight. That gets the fans’ attention so Cena throws out the challenge to Randy Orton for the title TONIGHT.

Cue Orton to list off the people he has beaten since winning the title, which is quite the impressive collection. Cena cuts him off and says yes, Orton has beaten them all, in addition to putting him on the shelf. That’s because Orton is smart, and that’s why he is going to take this match tonight. Orton is smart enough to think that there is no way Cena has healed in four months.

Cena says Orton is too smart to let Cena have eight more weeks to heal up and make it easier to whip Orton all over Disneyland (World. Get it right.). Orton isn’t buying it and says he only defends the title if people open their wallets and pay to see it, so no match tonight….but they can do it at No Way Out. Cena is in but says he wants some tonight, so he’ll get some. This was a weird way to go, but Cena being back boosts up any show so there was no other way to start things up.

Ashley Massaro/Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall/Beth Phoenix

Mickie and Jillian start things off with Mickie taking her down for a fast two. Beth comes in to mock Mickie for crying over last week’s loss before being sent….mostly into the post. A side slam plants Mickie so Jillian comes back in, only to get rolled up for two. Mickie neckbreakers her for two but gets dropped by Beth, setting up the fisherman’s suplex to give Beth the pin (Jillian was never in).

Post match Mickie is distraught again.

Vince McMahon and William Regal are in the back where Vince makes Cena vs. Orton for No Way Out. They need a Wrestlemania match though, with Regal saying they can have THAT match with the winner facing the winner of Cena vs. Orton at Wrestlemania. Vince: “Not THAT match.” Vince lets Regal go make it.

Here is William Regal to announce that the Elimination Chamber is back at No Way Out. After a video on the match, Regal explains the concept and announces Umaga, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, JBL, Jeff Hardy and HHH for the Chamber.

Mike Adamle announces what is coming tonight.

Cody Rhodes vs. Carlito

Hardcore Holly, Santino Marella and Maria are here too. Cody armdrags him into an armbar to start before winning a strike off in the corner. Another armdrag into an armbar doesn’t go so well but they roll with it anyway and it’s off to an arm crank to keep Carlito down. Carlito gets sent to the apron for a springboard punch to the face to send him outside. Back in and Cody gets distracted by Santino, allowing Carlito to grab a Backstabber for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not exactly good stuff here and the ending wasn’t quite inspired. At the same time, it isn’t a great sign that Carlito and Santino Marella seem to be the top challengers to the Tag Team Titles. If Rhodes and Holly as champions wasn’t enough proof, what other evidence do you need?

HHH and Shawn Michaels both want to get back into the title picture at No Way Out, but for tonight they need partners. As luck would have it, they both have their DX gear so it’s reunion time (and WWE Shop plug time).

D-Generation X vs. Snitsky/Umaga

After the usual pre-match chattering, HHH and Snitsky start things off. Hang on though as HHH grabs the mic and asks if anyone has a toothbrush, Tic Tacs, mints or ANYTHING before he has to fight Snitsky. HHH hits an early clothesline and slams his way out of trouble, meaning it’s off to Shawn. Umaga isn’t having that though and kicks Shawn off the top for the big crash. Back in and Snitsky takes us back to the 80s with the bearhug before choking in the corner. Umaga grabs his own bearhug and we take a break.

We come back with Shawn caught in the Tree of Woe and…Snitsky grabbing another bearhug. Shawn gets sent into the corner where he avoids the running Umaga attack. A DDT is enough for the tag off to HHH for the house cleaning but Umaga grabs a Samoa drop. Shawn superkicks Umaga in the back of the head and out to the floor for the dive, setting up the Pedigree to finish Snitsky.

Rating: C. Pretty paint by numbers tag match here with no drama about the result. It was more about whether HHH or Shawn would get the pin over Snitsky, as Umaga still has just enough star power to avoid taking a fall here. HHH and Shawn have much bigger deals to get to in the next few weeks and Umaga needs to be kept strong for the Chamber, leaving Snitsky getting pinned as the only way to go.

JBL comes up to Randy Orton, his partner in the main event, in the back and says they’re partners tonight but he’s taking the title at Wrestlemania. You know, assuming Orton wins at No Way Out. Orton likes the idea because he knows he can beat JBL.

Jeff Hardy is ready to get back to the title scene so he is ready to win the Elimination Chamber and go on to Wrestlemania.

Hornswoggle is in Vince McMahon’s office, where Vince berates him for being a loser.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick charges into the ring to start and gets sent into the corner. The running boot misses but Kennedy is back up with a shoulder first ram into the buckle. Kendrick gets in a kick to the face but misses a charge, setting up the Mic Check to give Kennedy the pin.

Post match Kennedy says he wanted in the Elimination Chamber, but he’ll settle for retiring Ric Flair at No Way Out instead. Cue Flair for some WOOing.

Maria vs. Melina

Santino Marella is here with Maria. Melina takes her down early but Maria is back up with a kick to the ribs. There’s the Bronco Buster in the corner but Maria misses a charge, allowing Melina to forearm her in the back. Maria hits a gutbuster (belly buster according to JR) but misses a charge in the corner. Melina tries a rollup but only pulls Maria’s tights down, allowing Maria to sit down on her for the pin.

Post match Santino runs in and throws his shirt around Maria’s waist and rants about her wanting to be in Playboy.

Chris Jericho is ready to be serious instead of the goofy guy so he can go to Wrestlemania.

Mike Adamle gives us the No Way Out rundown.

Jeff Hardy/Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton/John Bradshaw Layfield

Jericho wastes no time in suplexing Orton down and elbowing him in the face. Double knees to the face drop Orton again and Hardy hits a very early Swanton for two, with JBL pulling Orton out. We take a break and come back with Hardy hitting a running forearm to drop Orton, who pulls him into the corner by the throat.

Orton takes him down again and works on an armbar until Hardy fights up and hits a swinging sleeper drop. It’s back to Jericho to try the Walls but he has to stop and dropkick Orton off the apron. The Lionsault gets two on JBL as everything breaks down. The Walls go on JBL again but Orton makes the save with the RKO to give JBL the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty standard main event tag match here with the villains stealing the pin and giving JBL some momentum heading into the Chamber. It isn’t like he has any real chance to win so boosting him up even slightly in a match like this isn’t going to hurt. It makes more sense than Orton getting the pin so at least they thought about this one.

Post match here is John Cena to lay out Orton to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the strongest show coming out of the Royal Rumble and a lot of that is due to the lack of Jeff Hardy energy. That story was carrying the show for a good while and now that Hardy has lost, most of it is gone. Cena being back is the big deal of course, but moving the match to No Way Out in less than three weeks feels rushed to say the least. Pretty disappointing show here and that’s never fun to see.

 

 

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No Mercy 2016 (2022 Redo): It’s Downhill From Here

No Mercy 2016
Date: October 9, 2016
Location: Golden 1 Center, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 14,324
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga

So for some reason someone wanted me to redo this show, though it was a few years ago (because that’s how long it takes me to get from stuff other than weekly shows) so there is a good chance they aren’t even around anymore. This is a Smackdown exclusive show, as we’re fresh off the new Brand Split, with a main event of new Smackdown World Champion Dean Ambrose defending against John Cena and Dean Ambrose. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Hype Bros/American Alpha vs. Ascension/Vaudevillains

This show is less than six years old and seven of these eight wrestlers are gone from the active roster. Gable wrestles English down to start and hands it off to Jordan. The Vaudevillains are taken down without much trouble so it’s Viktor coming in to headlock Ryder (who the fans really like). That doesn’t last long either as it’s off to the very hyped Rawley, who takes Viktor down as well. Everything breaks down and the good guys clear the ring to send us to a break.

Back with Ryder in trouble as Ascension takes turns beating him down. English comes in to stomp away and put on a chinlock of his own. Ryder’s escape attempt is driven (hard) back into the corner and Konnor comes in to glare. Ryder does manage to escape but Ascension is smart enough to pull his partners down. That doesn’t last long either as the hot tag brings in Jordan to clean house. Everything breaks down and Gable hits a high crossbody, setting up Grand Amplitude to finish English at 9:09.

Rating: C. The high level of chinlockery hurt this a bit but they did the right thing by having the entertaining teams go in there and do their thing. American Alpha was so good at what they did and the Hype Bros were indeed good at getting the crowd going. That left the Vaudevillains as passable heels and the Ascension as…..boy were those Vaudevillains decent heels.

The opening video has a Biblical theme, focusing on the major matches and asking for mercy for every bad thing people have done.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles

Styles is defending after having beaten both of them in singles matches and Cena is hunting for World Title #16. That being said, you would think someone with those skills would get a better reception than a JOHN CENA SUCKS chant. After the entrances, we get a video of Styles beating Cena at Summerslam and then Ambrose at Backlash to win the title. Shane McMahon made the title match and here we go, with Cena wanting the title and Ambrose saying Cena can’t do it anymore.

With that out of the way, we ring the bell and it’s a three way staredown to start. None of them can hit an early finisher so it’s a triple clothesline to put everyone down. Ambrose is up first and knocks them outside, with Styles being sent into the announcers’ table. Cena catches a diving Ambrose and drives him back first into the post, leaving Styles to hit the slingshot forearm.

Back in and Ambrose snaps Styles’ throat across the rope but can’t suplex him to the floor. That’s fine with Cena, who German suplexes both of them at once. With Ambrose knocked outside, Cena plants Styles for a quick two and is already looking banged up. Styles is fine enough to flip out of the AA though and an enziguri drops Cena. Ambrose comes back in and is promptly sent over the top for a crash onto the steps. The Code Red gives Cena two on Styles but the super AA is countered into a torture rack powerbomb for Styles’ own near fall.

Back up and Cena and Styles trade sleepers until Ambrose comes back in for one of his own on Cena. That’s broken up and Cena initiates the finishing sequence on Ambrose, at least until Styles puts Cena down for two. Ambrose faceplants Styles for two but gets sent outside, allowing Cena to beat on Styles. Hold on though as Ambrose comes back in with the standing elbow drop for two and the Phenomenal Forearm sends Cena outside.

Styles snaps off a super hurricanrana to Ambrose, who rolls it through into a sunset flip for two. A double clothesline leaves them both down so here is Cena again. The Shuffle hits Styles but Ambrose breaks it up, only to get caught with an AA for two. The STF has Ambrose in trouble but Styles makes the save and knocks Cena off the apron. Styles’ springboard 450 gets two on Ambrose so Cena comes back in to STF Styles, with Ambrose preventing the tap (how he is preventing Styles from saying I QUIT isn’t clear).

The double AA is broken up though and Styles kicks Cena in the head for another triple knockdown. Cena is back up and powerbombs Ambrose out of the corner but gets pulled into the Calf Crusher. Ambrose breaks that up and Calf Crushes Styles for a change, with Cena adding the STF.

Styles taps at 19:26 but since it was a double submission, it means nothing and they all keep fighting. That didn’t make sense when I watched it live and it still doesn’t now. Ambrose hits Dirty Deeds on Cena so Styles pulls the referee out, earning himself a suicide dive. Back in and Cena hits the super AA on Ambrose but Styles chairs Cena down and pins him to retain at 21:40.

Rating: B. They started big on this show and the three of them had a heck of a match in this spot. The match had a cool structure to it as Styles was doing the high flying, Ambrose was the wild brawler and Cena was there with the power. It made for a very good match, save for the dumb double pin thing. I’m not sure how much sense that makes, but Styles getting a pin in this spot is a great thing for his title reign.

We recap Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton. Bray targeted Orton and took him out at Backlash and it’s time for the two to fight.

Becky Lynch has a medical issue and can’t defend the Smackdown Women’s Title against Alexa Bliss but Bliss will still have a match.

Nikki Bella vs. Carmella

Nikki came back from injury earlier this year but got jumped by Carmella twice in the same night. Carmella jumps her again but gets thrown around by the hair as Nikki is doing her powerhouse thing. A baseball slide sends Carmella to the floor, where Carmella drops her throat first across the barricade. Nikki’s back is bent around the post as Carmella gets a bit more cocky (shocking I know).

We hit the chinlock with some screaming, though there isn’t much noise for it to cover. Nikki fights out and hits a kind of spear, setting up the Bella Buster (what a witty and clever name) for two. A small package gives Nikki the same so she smashes Carmella with the forearm. Carmella is fine enough to grab the Code Of Silence to send a screaming Nikki (I think?) to the ropes. The frustrated Carmella pounds away but gets caught in the Rack Attack 2.0 to give Nikki the pin at 8:05.

Rating: C. It’s kind of fascinating to look back at Nikki, as she really wasn’t that bad in the ring. The fans certainly liked her and she could do a good enough powerhouse match. The problem is that she got so much attention over the years and did had a limit to her skills, but knowing what else you could get in the division from the Women’s Revolution didn’t help things in the slightest. For now though, fighting through an injury to beat Carmella was a nice way to go and the match was hardly bad.

Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan (Smackdown bosses) are happy with how the show is going so far. Miz and Maryse come in with the former promising to retire Dolph Ziggler, which he blames on Bryan. No matter how many times you watch Rocky IV, Apollo Creed always dies. After he wins tonight, Miz wants to renegotiate his contract because some of that Ziggler money will be available.

Tag Team Titles: Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Usos

Slater and Rhyno, the inaugural Smackdown Tag Team Champions, are defending after having won the titles at Backlash. This was part of a pretty entertaining story that saw Slater desperately trying to get a job anyway he could and winding up winning the titles with Rhyno as a result. Rhyno punches Jimmy into the corner to start and hands it off to Heath, who gets taken into the wrong corner so the twins can start up the beating.

The chinlock goes on for all of five seconds before Heath fights up and brings Rhyno back in. The Gore is broken up by a Jey distraction and the running Umaga Attack in the corner takes over. It’s time to start in on Rhyno’s knee, with Jimmy holding a kneebar so Jey can hit a basement dropkick. Rhyno fights up again and spinebusters his way to freedom, allowing the hot tag to Heath.

Everything breaks down and Jey hits a pop up Samoan drop for two on Heath. The double superkick is broken up but Rhyno gets dropkicked through the ropes. Jimmy goes up but gets powerslammed down (cool) for two. Back up and Jimmy hits the dropkick to the knee (an Usos standard) has Heath in trouble, only to have Rhyno come back with the Gore. The tag to Rhyno sets up another Gore to retain the titles at 10:18.

Rating: C+. This felt like a rather good TV match and given how new the titles still were, this was about as good as it was going to be. Slater and Rhyno were the feel good champions and aren’t likely to hold the titles very long, but at least they had a nice pay per view title defense on the way there. I’m thinking the Usos will be fine too.

Bray Wyatt is in his rocking chair and seems to be speaking in tongues. He shifts over to an English version of He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands and laughs a bit. More on this later I’m assuming.

We recap Jack Swagger beating Baron Corbin on Smackdown when Corbin might not have actually tapped.

Baron Corbin vs. Jack Swagger

Corbin starts fast by trying/missing the slide under the ropes clothesline, earning himself a clothesline out to the floor. Swagger goes out too but gets sent into the steps, which Corbin kicks onto his hand to put him in real trouble. The whip into the corner drops Swagger again and it’s back to the hand. Swagger powers up and hits a suplex, setting up the Vader Bomb for two.

Corbin knocks him down a few more times though and stands there, making it clear that Corbin’s original look wasn’t a great way to go for such posing. A quick ankle lock gets Swagger out of trouble but the hand gives out again. That and a shot to the eye set up End of Days to finish Swatter at 7:27.

Rating: D+. This is what you get from a Brand Split show, as you’re left with a still not very good Corbin getting match against Swagger that felt a lot longer than it was. Swagger was so done at this point but WWE kept putting him out there to come up shorter and shorter every time. Corbin would have a future, but there was A LOT of tweaking to do on the way there.

We recap Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler for the Intercontinental Title. Ziggler has been on a losing streak and isn’t sure if he can do this anymore. At the same time, Miz is on an absolute roll as Intercontinental Champion and has held the title since the night after Wrestlemania. Therefore, it was time for the latest Ziggler reheat, where he does one or two things rather well and gets us to this match. Somehow this was built around the idea of Ziggler never living up to his potential while showing the pretty lengthy amount of titles and accomplishments he has earned. Therefore, it’s title vs. career after a pretty nice package.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

Miz, with Maryse, is defending and this is title vs. career. An early clothesline misses for Miz and Ziggler hits a dropkick for two. Another clothesline sets up a Cactus Clothesline and they’re both on the floor. A kick to the ropes slows Ziggler down on the way back in though and Miz sends him hard into the corner. The fans are suddenly all over Miz as he grabs a double underhook crank, followed by another clothesline.

Since he hasn’t done it in a bit, Miz channels Daniel Bryan with the surfboard leg stop, setting up another double arm crank. A neckbreaker sets up the running corner dropkicks but Ziggler hits his own dropkick to put them both down. Back up and Ziggler hits his own neckbreaker into the jumping elbow for two, meaning frustration can set in. They trade rollups for two, though Miz putting his feet on the ropes kind of takes away the balance.

Ziggler’s running DDT is countered but Miz’s standing version isn’t, leaving both of them down again. Miz starts in on the knee and, after having his slingshot powerbomb countered, grabs the Figure Four in the relative area of the center of the ring. The rope is eventually grabbed and Ziggler is able to hit the jumping DDT for two. With nothing else working, Miz takes a turnbuckle pad off and sends Ziggler into the steel, setting up the slingshot sitout powerbomb (maybe the fourth time he has tried it) for two more.

The YES Kicks rock Ziggler but he ducks the big one and hits the Zig Zag for two, with the fans WAY into this. The superkick is countered into a Skull Crushing Finale attempt, which is countered into a rollup to give Ziggler another near fall. Ziggler grabs the sleeper and this time it’s Miz grabbing the rope. With the referee checking on Miz, Maryse blinds Ziggler with the hairspray and the Skull Crushing Finale connects for….two, as Ziggler gets his foot on the rope.

That’s a BIG reaction from the crowd so the frustrated Miz goes right back to the leg. Ziggler loses his boot though and it’s a socked superkick for…no cover, as Maryse calls out the Spirit Squad. Ziggler takes one of them out but gets Skull Crushing Finaled for a VERY near fall. The Squad is ejected and it’s a superkick to give Ziggler the pin and the title at 19:47.

Rating: B. The action was good but the drama is what carried this one the entire way. The fans were WAY into this one and wanted to see Ziggler pull this off in the end. That is what happens when you build up a good story and make the fans want to see the payoff so well done on all counts. As usual, Miz continues to be able to have an awesome match when he has the right kind of setup and that is what they pulled off here. Not a classic, but a heck of a story.

Randy Orton looks at himself in a mirror and the reflection gets distorted.

The Kickoff Show panel chats about the show.

Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi

Naomi is a replacement for the injured Becky Lynch and comes out after Alexa goes on a long rant about Lynch. Bliss runs her over to start but gets kicked into the corner, setting up the split legged moonsault for an early two. Back up and Bliss hits a knee to take over again before starting in on the arm. The fans want Becky as Bliss cranks on the arm and shouts NO YOU DON’T.

We hit the seated armbar before some stomping sets up…uh…another seated armbar. Bliss: “You’re not on my level Naomi! They don’t even like you!” Naomi fights up and hits the Rear View (or at least close to it, as it looked like she didn’t make much contact) for two. Bliss goes for the arm but Naomi stacks her up for the pin at 5:24.

Rating: D+. Yeah this didn’t exactly work, with the big move from Naomi missing and the ending coming off as lame and out of nowhere. I’m sure they’re trying to set up some kind of triple threat or something close to it, but there is only so much interesting in whatever they’re doing. Bad match, though it was there in the death spot anyway.

Hell In A Cell rundown.

We recap bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton. Wyatt attacked him at Backlash and then did his usual mind games, only to have Orton do the same thing. In other words, more Bray Wyatt stuff to set up a feud and it’s the main event.

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Dang the Fireflies are still an awesome look. Orton shoves him outside off a lockup to start and it’s time for some breathing. Back in and Orton pulls him down by the hair and then hammers away in the corner. Sister Abigail is broken up but so is the hanging DDT, with Wyatt pulling him outside this time. An RKO attempt is countered with a shove over the announcers’ table and Wyatt shoves him into the barricade to make it worse.

Back in and Orton fights out of the chinlock so Wyatt slams him down without much effort. Wyatt takes WAY too long to set up a middle rope backsplash and crashes down hard. Orton starts slugging away and hits a clothesline out of the corner but has to get out of Sister Abigail.

The powerslam gives Orton two but Wyatt hits a running crossbody for two of his own. Another RKO and Sister Abigail are countered but Wyatt hits the release Rock Bottom for two. They head outside again but this time Orton avoids the backsplash onto the steps. Back in and the hanging DDT connects for two….but then the lights go out and Luke Harper is here. The distraction sets up the Sister Abigail to give Wyatt the pin at 15:41.

Rating: C+. In other words, Wyatt does his usual match and then has some kind of screwy finish to get him on to whatever is next. In this case that would be Orton joining the Wyatt Family and then destroying it from within. Somehow this was worthy of a Wrestlemania World Title match, despite it only being a pretty good match in the first place.

Post match Wyatt and Harper hug to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The opener and Ziggler vs. Miz are enough to carry this but there is only so much that you can get out of a show with such weak stuff in the middle. There were some good matches on here, but the bad stuff drags it down that much better. Unfortunately with the Brand Split, there are only going to be so many ways to keep the interest up and it doesn’t seem likely to get much better than this. Good enough show here, but there are some obvious problems.

Here is the original review if you need a recap.

 

 

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Smackdown – December 28, 2007 (Best Of 2007): The Best Of 2007

Smackdown
Date: December 28, 2007
Host: Michael Cole

It’s the end of the year and that means we get another Best Of show, as should be the case for this time of the year. There was a lot going on this year and that means we could get a nice selection here. Odds are there will be some pay per view matches included as well to boost up the TV stuff a bit. Let’s get to it.

As usual, I’ll be posting the full versions of matches rather than the clipped ones shown on the broadcast.

Michael Cole (not shown) welcomes us to the show, which will feature the Top 5 Matches Of The Year, as voted on by the fans.

#5. From Wrestlemania XXVIII.

Edge vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy vs. CM Punk vs. King Booker vs. Finlay vs. Randy Orton vs. Mr. Kennedy

Money in the Bank as they’re starting big this year. Everyone looks up at the briefcase to start and then it’s already time to head outside for the fight. It’s a brawl to start and Finlay dives off the top onto almost everyone else. Matt has to cut off Edge’s climb, leaving Orton and Finlay to climb the ladder to no avail. Booker goes to pull out another ladder but finds Hornswoggle’s stepladder instead, allowing Punk to knock him down.

Edge bridges a ladder between the apron and the barricade but Booker starts cleaning house. There’s the Spanarooni, only to have the Hardys run Booker over with ladders. For some reason Finlay saves Edge from the see saw ladder treatment and Edge suplexes Matt onto the ladder. Kennedy’s Kenton Bomb onto hits ladder (with Kennedy landing HARD on the back of his head) and it’s a Hardy slugout on top of the ladder.

Finlay breaks that up but gets speared down by Edge. More spears drop just about everyone else but Punk wraps the ladder around his head to knock out various people. Edge slides in the big ladder and climbs, at least until Orton shoves him over the top and out to the floor. Matt lays Edge over the bridged ladder and Jeff dives onto him, breaking the ladder to get rid of both of them. Both guys are taken out on stretchers and we’re down to a six way.

Now it’s time for the parade of RKOs and Orton climbs, despite not being underneath the briefcase. Punk breaks that up and climbs as well, only to get taken down with a super RKO for the huge spot. Booker grabs the Book End and goes up but Matt is there to catch him. Cue Queen Sharmell to grab Matt’s leg but Booker gets distracted by Matt and walks into the Twist of Fate.

Finlay gives Matt a Celtic Cross onto the ladder, busting himself open in the process. Now it’s Hornswoggle going up the ladder until Kennedy catches him for a super Regal Roll off the ladder. Punk dropkicks the ladder down to cut Finlay off and it’s Punk vs. Kennedy on top of the ladder. Kennedy gets knocked down but comes back up and kicks Punk down, allowing him to grab the briefcase for the win.

Rating: B. I never know how to rate these things but it was another blast with everyone flying around and having one crash after another. This was a lot of fun and one of the right people won, which is what matters the most in a match like Money in the Bank. Everyone got a chance to shine here, even in a complete car crash match like this one. Rather fun opener.

Great Moment: Beth Phoenix. No specific moment, but just her time this year.

Great Moment: HHH returns at Summerslam.

#4. From No Mercy.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH, with bad ribs, is defending in a Last Man Standing match. They stare at each other to start until Orton gets smart by going after the bad (and untaped) ribs. More shots to the ribs sent HHH outside, where his quick Pedigree attempt is countered with a legsweep to send the ribs into the ramp.

Back in and more shots to the ribs set up a belly to back drop onto the barricade for a six count. A whip into the steps gets six more so they head back inside. HHH manages a much needed facebuster for a breather but Orton’s backbreaker puts him down for eight more. That just has Orton frustrated so he grabs a TV cord and chokes HHH into some nasty spitting.

HHH gets up at nine so the annoyed Orton sends him outside. The ECW announcers’ table (with Joey and Tazz still there after their minute and thirty seven second match earlier) is loaded up and a monitor to the head rocks HHH. The RKO through the table is shoved off though and Orton crashes through the table hard. Orton is up at nine as well so HHH hits a spinebuster on the floor for another nine.

Some steps to the head get another nine count and they roll back inside. Orton manages a DDT onto a chair to stun HHH though and the RKO onto the open chair leave a bloody HHH down. The ropes get HHH back up and he throws in the crotch chop before falling to the mat again. Orton’s Punt is blocked though and HHH makes the fired up comeback by taking Orton outside and sending him into various objects.

Orton cuts him off though and a catapult sends HHH head first into the post for another near fall. The steps are picked up but HHH cuts him off with a low blow. That leaves Orton’s heads in the steps and it’s a chair shot to crush him again. Orton gets up again and the Pedigree is loaded up, only to have him counter into the RKO onto the table for the ten count and the title.

Rating: B. They picked it up in the end but this was a lot of standing around waiting after someone does something big. In other words, it’s a Last Man Standing match but it’s a Last Man Standing match without a reason for these two to hate each other. I do like that they gave us the kind of match they advertised, but it was a weird position to be in after the Cena vs. Orton feud got so personal and HHH was just a last minute substitute.

Video on Vince McMahon putting HHH in a career threatening match against Ric Flair next week on Raw.

#3. From Raw, April 23.

John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Non-title and we even get an old school weapons check. Shawn takes him down by the arm to start but gets reversed into a headscissors for the early break. Back up and Shawn goes after the arm again so Cena tries an STF to send Shawn bailing again. Another STF attempt has Cena running into the corner so they go technical for a change. Cena doesn’t care for that and powers him down to the mat, sending Shawn to the ropes again. They trade shots to the face and we take an early break.

Back with Cena grabbing a headlock takeover to grind Shawn down for a change. It works so well that Cena does it again and Shawn can’t get out of it in his first few attempts. Shawn fights up again and tries a hiptoss, only to get blasts with a clothesline to set up the chinlock again. The next escape attempt actually works and Shawn hammers away to take over for the first time. Cena gets a boot up in the corner though and a heck of a clothesline gets two.

A Sweet Chin Music attempt is countered into an AA attempt but Shawn bails out to the floor as we take another break. Back with Shawn elbowing away in the corner until Cena catches him with a World’s Strongest Slam. The release fisherman’s suplex gets two and the Throwback is good for the same. Shawn comes back with a quick swinging neckbreaker and they’re both down for a breather. Back up and the flying forearm drops Cena so Shawn can nip up.

The top rope elbow connects but Cena is ready for Sweet Chin Music. The big flying shoulder misses and Cena falls to the floor….where he is fine enough to pull Shawn’s dive out of the air. A posting is countered into a ram into the steps to leave Cena down as we take another break. Back again with Cena down on the floor, seemingly with a bad shoulder, so Shawn takes him back inside to crank on the arm. Cena fights up and initiates the finishing sequence, including the Shuffle. The FU gets two and that brings the fans back into things as we take a fourth break.

We come back again with Cena throwing him hard to the floor to bang up Shawn’s back even more. A posting gives Cena two back inside and the kickout has him a little stunned. Cena scores with a suplex (with Shawn still holding his back for a nice touch) for two and it’s off to the rather wise bearhug.

Shawn fights out so Cena dumps him over the top for the crash to the floor, setting up the top rope legdrop for two back inside. The super FU is countered into a powerbomb but Shawn can’t follow up. Another STF attempt earns another block and Shawn knocks him off the apron, into the announcers’ table. A piledriver onto the steps, ala Wrestlemania, is blocked and we take another break.

We come back again with Cena unloading on Shawn on the announcers’ table and NOW the STF can go on inside. The long form crawl gets Shawn to the rope for the break but he has to slip out of the FU….and hit Sweet Chin Music for a very delayed two. Shawn is whipped hard into the corner so Cena tries the FU again, only to have Shawn get out and hit the superkick, this time falling on top for the pin (after about 55 minutes, a Raw record for a one fall match).

Rating: A-. What else is there to say about this? It’s one of the best TV matches of all time as it is both very long and also high quality throughout. You almost never get to see that and they made it work very well here. It’s an excellent match and felt like a Wrestlemania worthy main event. You could go back and forth on which was better, but this is going to be very hard to top for a long time to come.

Shawn says something to Cena and holds up the title to end the show. Edge vs. Orton didn’t happen, which I’m assuming has something to do with Orton being sent home from the tour. Good chance that’s why this match had to go so long.

Video on Tribute To The Troops, featuring Hilary Clinton.

Here’s a highlight reel of some of the best moments of the year.

#2. From Survivor Series.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

#1. From Wrestlemania XXIII.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and Teddy Long handles the introductions for a bit of a weird moment. We get the full druid entrance for Undertaker, which will never stop being awesome. Batista spears him down at the bell and it’s time to trade right hands in the corner. It’s actually Batista getting the better of things and the fans are not too thrilled with that. Undertaker pulls him outside for a ram into the apron but Batista is right back for a hard whip into the steps.

Back in and Batista nails a top rope shoulder (dang) for two and a heck of a clothesline cuts Undertaker off again. Undertaker slugs back from his knees and punches Batista into the corner for the running clotheslines. Snake Eyes into the big boot sets up the legdrop for two as we’re back to mostly even. Old School looks to set up the chokeslam but Batista powers out and knocks Undertaker down.

Undertaker doesn’t seem to mind as he sends Batista to the apron for the legdrop. There’s the Taker Dive and they’re both down on the floor. Back up and Batista drives him HARD through the barricade and hammers away as things have cranked up in a hurry. The announcers’ table is loaded up and a running powerslam drives Undertaker through it for the big crash. That’s only good for two back inside so Batista punches away even more.

The Batista Bomb is broken up with a drive into the corner but Batista is right back….with right hands from the middle rope. I guess HHH didn’t teach him that one and it’s the Last Ride for two. The frustrated Undertaker gets caught in a spinebuster but pops back up with a chokeslam for two. Batista slips out of the chokeslam and hits the spear into the Batista Bomb for two as the fans are WAY into these near falls. Undertaker backdrops his way out of another Batista Bomb and sends Batista into the corner. The Tombstone is enough to give Undertaker the pin and the title.

Rating: A-. This felt like a Wrestlemania level title match between two monsters. These two beat the fire out of each other and didn’t bother with anything other than the big power moves. They were trading bombs throughout the whole match and it was a question of who would survive, which made the whole thing world. It helps when Undertaker was motivated by being put in the middle of the card and cranked it up a notch, as both guys felt like they were on another level here.

We look at Edge returning and winning the World Title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. There was a lot here and it was an entertaining show, mainly because they shows almost the full matches instead of trying to cram in as much stuff as they could. It felt like a Best Of show instead of a timeline of the year and that is a good thing. Pretty awesome night and I liked what we got here, especially when it was more about filling in the TV requirement and taking a week off than doing anything else.

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – December 24, 2007 (Tribute To The Troops): They Do This Well

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 24, 2007
Location: Camp Speicher, Tikrit, Iraq
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the annual Tribute To The Troops show and this time around it happens to air on Christmas Eve. I can’t imagine that is going to go well for the audience numbers but this is a special show that gets some special treatment. The match quality isn’t going to be the point here either but let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the United States Army helping the Iraqi people and a voiceover about how important this whole thing is.

Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. Jericho goes with an armdrag to start and Orton is a bit frustrated early on. Some choking in the corner annoys Jericho, who comes back out with an armdrag into an armbar. A dropkick to the leg takes Orton down again and Jericho elbows him in the head. They head outside with Jericho chopping away, then borrowing a soldier’s camera for a quick photo (that was cool). The distraction lets Orton get in a quick shot to the ribs though and there’s the hanging DDT as we take a break.

Back with Jericho fighting out of a chinlock but getting kneed in the ribs to put him right back down. The knee drop misses so Orton grabs a sleeper, which he switches straight into another chinlock. Jericho finally belly to back suplexes his way to freedom, followed by the missile dropkick for two. The enziguri into the bulldog sets up the Lionsault for a slightly delayed near fall but Orton goes to the eye. There’s the backbreaker to drop Jericho but he’s fine enough to counter the RKO into the Walls….and JBL’s music rings, with the bell making Jericho think he won. Then JBL gets in the ring for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They had a fun match (with the camera spot being worth a smile), though the DQ finish is a bit of an odd choice in a non-title match on a show like this one. Maybe WWE didn’t want to dampen the soldiers’ spirits by saying “yeah but he doesn’t win the title”, but it was kind of a strange feeling. At least Jericho vs. JBL should be fine going forward and a good way for JBL to get back in the ring.

Post match Orton hits Jericho with the RKO and heads off, leaving Jericho to eat the Clothesline From JBL.

Long video on the WWE people meeting the troops, including Vince McMahon asking two women which is grabbing, uh, him, during a photo.

Jeff Hardy vs. Carlito

Non-title. Again. Carlito backs into the corner to start, with Hardy getting smart by hitting a dropkick to the back to stagger him anyway. Hardy’s headlock doesn’t last long so Carlito tries a leapfrog, which is countered into something like a spinebuster (that might have been some miscommunication).

Back up and Carlito sends him into the ropes, where Hardy slides outside and high fives the front row (that could have easily been a regular spot). They switch places and Hardy hits a baseball slide, only to get caught with the Backstabber back inside. A quick Sling Blade gives Hardy two but the Twist of Fate is countered into a swinging neckbreaker for two. Carlito loads up the apple (as he is known to do) but walks into the Twist of Fate. The Swanton finishes for Hardy.

Rating: C. Totally simple match between the two here and that’s all this should have been. What matters is giving the fans a nice moment, though I’m even more confused why this wasn’t a title match. If Hardy is going over clean, why not have it be a title defense?

The troops talk about what they miss about America but they love putting up military art to spice things up a bit and make it a bit more their own. Cool.

We hear a story about a suicide bomber killing 19 soldiers in a mess hall. Not so cool.

Quick video on the progress that has been made so far.

Here is Vince McMahon for a chat. He gets straight to the point and thanks the troops for everything they do. With that simple message out of the way, let’s bring out the Divas.

Kelly Kelly/Layla vs. Maria/Mickie James

Yeah they’re over with this crowd. Joined in progress with Layla working on Maria’s wrist before we’re off to the catfight. Kelly comes in and gets kicked in the ribs as Lawler is having all of the fun you would expect here. Mickie comes in to avoid Kelly’s handspring elbow in the corner and gets in the required spanking. Everything breaks down and Maria and Mickie hit stereo Bronco Busters….but Vince stops the match.

Vince says the soldiers have gotten enough of this and Santa Claus IS NOT COMING TO IRAQ! Cue Santa, with his arm in a sling, to call Santa naughty. Vince didn’t want Santa coming here but he didn’t realize that Santa’s sleigh was built Army strong. Santa remembers that Vince stole a magazine from a convenience store as a kid.

Vince doesn’t buy it but Santa has a letter from Vince as a child (Santa: “It’s over 100 years old!”). See, Vince wanted a rooster as a child, plus a Red Rider BB gun! Vince pulls the beard off and it’s John Cena (shocking I know), who hits a one armed FU. With that out of the way, Santa has the Divas throw out gifts from his sack for the feel good moment.

Video on the progress the military has made in recent months.

There was a re-enlistment ceremony in the arena.

More wrestlers meet more troops.

The military has taken over a soccer stadium where the Iraqi national team was killed for losing a game. That stadium is where this show is taking place.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry

Henry shoves him down to start but Mysterio is dumb enough to hammer away. Some headbutts put Rey in the corner but he comes back again with a few dropkicks. A gorilla press drop gives Henry two and we hit the bearhug. Rey bites his way to freedom and gets clotheslined for another two. The splash misses though and a springboard seated senton gives Rey two of his own. Henry misses a charge in the corner and gets hit with the 619. Another springboard seated senton and a rollup are enough to give Rey the pin.

Rating: C. It’s as much of a David vs. Goliath match as you can get and Mysterio has known how to wrestle those for the better part of ever. All he had to do was keep moving and make Henry miss and he would be fine, which is exactly how the match went. Nothing wrong with this one as it’s pretty much Mysterio’s bread and butter most of the time.

Soldiers tell stories about improvised explosive devices injuring them at various times.

John Cena explains various military vehicles and a soldier gets to say hello to his family.

Raw Rebound.

Chris Jericho talks about his trip, ranging from the 16 hour flight to meeting troops.

D-Generation X vs. Mr. Kennedy/Umaga

We’re joined in progress with Shawn atomic dropping Kennedy and dropping him (less atomically) him again with some right hands. Umaga breaks up an early superkick attempt to give Kennedy two before coming in to headbutt Shawn. There’s a knee drop for two as the fans get behind Shawn rather quickly. It’s back to Kennedy for the front facelock before Umaga puts on the nerve hold.

An uppercut stops Shawn’s comeback attempt and Kennedy’s Regal Roll gets two. The middle rope splash misses for Umaga though and it is time to clean house. HHH goes through his usual array of offense before getting run over by Umaga to cut that off fast. The Samoan Spike is broken up by the superkick through and it’s another superkick to send Kennedy into the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C+. This is another match that could have headlined dozens of house shows and it did well enough here. What matters is the good guys going over to send the troops out happy and they did that just fine. It wasn’t exactly a complicated match but they made things work with the basic match they were trying to have.

Some troops get to pose with DX.

One more music video of WWE meeting the troops wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. This is one of those shows where the ratings don’t matter whatsoever and that was definitely the case this year. The matches were all basic and the highlights were the videos of WWE interacting with the troops. It’s not supposed to be a regular show but they got the point across and had some fine enough matches along the way, so we’ll call it good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2017 (2018 Redo): Four For Fighting

Summerslam 2017
Date: August 20, 2017
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,128
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s kind of amazing how these modern shows go in one ear and out the other. Aside from the main event, I couldn’t tell you a single thing on this show, and I can tell you every match (mostly in order) from the first seventeen or so Wrestlemanias. It’s the nature of the shows being built up so fast and then running so long, as the same is true of shows I’ve been to even this year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: The Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Rematch from Raw. Now this one I remember because it took place about twenty minutes into the two hour Kickoff Show and the place was embarrassingly empty with MAYBE twenty percent of the place full. It’s just awful looking as the fans who aren’t in yet (as in the majority of them) are going to be annoyed at missing a match and the wrestlers have to go out in front of this empty building like they’re on some nothing indy show (in a huge arena for some reason). I mean, what in the world is the point?

Matt headlocks Axel to start and it’s quickly off to Jeff as the dozens and dozens of fans get behind the good guys. Jordan comes in to crank on the arm to no reaction, at least partially because there aren’t many people here to cheer. A dropkick gets two on Dallas and Jordan muscles him down to the mat.

Everything breaks down and Jordan directs traffic as the Hardys chop away in the corner. Axel saves Dallas from the Swanton and we take a break. Back with Jeff getting two off a basement dropkick as the crowd is now just embarrassing instead of depressing. Dallas pushed Jeff off the top though and it’s time to start the stomping in the corner. Miz (oh yeah he’s in this match) comes in for a reverse chinlock but Jeff kicks him away without too much effort.

Instead it’s Axel coming in to twist Jeff’s neck around as the fans chant for BROTHER NERO. Jeff dropkicks Miz and Dallas off the apron and knocks Axel away as well, allowing the lukewarm tag off to Matt. The middle rope elbow to the back of the neck gets two on Miz but he’s right back up with the YES Kicks. Matt shrugs those off though and there’s a Side Effect for the same. Jordan comes in to throw Axel around, including a suplex for two. Everything breaks down and Miz makes a blind tag, setting up a Skull Crushing Finale to pin Jordan at 10:31.

Rating: C. The crowd killed what would have otherwise been a pretty good six man tag. When you can hear the wrestlers breathing, it’s pretty clear that there isn’t much going on in the arena, which isn’t exactly the atmosphere you want for a show billed as a big party. The match itself was fine, and it helps to not have watched it six days earlier.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Akira Tozawa vs. Neville

Tozawa, part of Titus Worldwide, is defending after winning the title from Neville on Monday. He also has a banged up shoulder. You remember Neville. He was the awesome guy who turned into one of the best heels in the company but WWE decided that having him put over Enzo Amore made more sense and since there was apparently no way Neville could be a heavyweight again, he walked out a few months later.

Neville shoulders him down to start and then dropkicks the glare off of Tozawa’s face. That’s it for now though as Neville sends him outside and screams a lot, as is his custom. The jumping backsplash crushes Neville back inside but he’s able to snap Tozawa’s throat across the top rope. Back from a break with Neville scoring off a missile dropkick to the back for two and stopping to sneer.

The chinlock lets Tozawa have a breather and he fights up to send Neville outside again. That means the big suicide dive and a Saito suplex but it’s too early for the top rope backsplash. Instead Tozawa reverses a fireman’s carry into an Octopus hold as he’s certainly keeping things varied. Neville makes the ropes so Tozawa hits a Shining Wizard for two.

An enziguri staggers Tozawa but he’s right back with a second Shining Wizard to put both guys down. Tozawa is up first but gets pulled down by the bad shoulder. His legs are fine enough to kick Neville in the head and it’s time to go up again. After knocking Neville off the top, the backsplash hits knees and the champ is in big trouble. Neville jumps up top and hits the Red Arrow to the back for the pin and the title at 11:45.

Rating: C+. I get what they were going for here with the title change taking place on Summerslam but why not go with the first title change here and then switch it back tomorrow or the next week on Raw? Or, dare I suggest it, on 205 Live? Other than that it felt like they were just kind of going through the motions at times, but Neville going through the motions is still pretty good.

The crowd is fine now.

Kickoff Show: Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. New Day

New Day is defending in what is kind of another Smackdown rematch, though it’s a different New Day lineup. Tonight it’s Woods and Big E., who has a huge cape. On the way to the ring, Kofi talks about how this is the place New Day first sang together and the original Francesca was born. Her sacrifice is what allowed us to have Francesca II: TURBO. Tonight they’re here to tear the house down with the Usos one more time.

Woods and Jimmy start things off in a technical sequence until Woods hits a roaring elbow to knock Jimmy’s block off. Some forearms in the corner have Jimmy in trouble but he gets in a shot to the face to stagger Woods. Back from a break with Jey putting on a chinlock and then slinging Woods into the corner. Woods knocks Jey off the top and avoids a charge from Jimmy. A missile dropkick has Jey in trouble but Jimmy pulls Big E. off the apron.

Thankfully the hot tag isn’t just a few seconds later and a backbreaker/middle rope knee combination gets two. Woods is in big trouble but scores with a victory roll faceplant (not a bad little move), which is finally enough for the hot tag to Big E. House is cleaned, including the release Rock Bottom out of the corner for two on Jey. Big E. powerbombs Woods onto Jey as the fast tags begin.

Woods even manages to electric chair Big E. so he can splash Jey as well but Jimmy comes in for a save. The double spinebuster gets two on Big E. and there’s the running Umaga attack for good measure as the pace picks up. Woods comes back in for a Rock Bottom into a Backstabber, which is somehow only good for two. That’s a heck of a finisher for those two if they’re ever a regular team.

Jey gets a blind tag but Woods knocks both Usos to the floor just in case. Big E.’s spear through the ropes is cut off by a superkick and a Superfly Splash while he’s still stuck in the ropes. The regular Superfly Splash gets a close two on Woods but he pulls Jey into a Koji Clutch. That’s broken up as well so Woods goes with a Shining Wizard for two.

A tornado DDT to the floor plants Jey and Jimmy takes the Midnight Hour, only to have Jey dive in at the last second for another save. Jimmy Samoan drops Woods to the floor and Kofi gets sent into the steps for checking on his buddy. Big E. is right back up with the spear through the ropes to take Jey down. Woods is done though and it’s four straight superkicks to Big E. into the double Us to give the Usos the titles back at 19:09.

Rating: B. Is there any surprise that this was the best thing on the Kickoff Show? This took some time to get going but these four delivered, as always. They know how to work well together and the diving saves for the false finishes were great. You could run these two over and over again, which is exactly what happened for the next few months. That can only go on for so long though, and that’s why the division isn’t great to this day.

The opening video starts with a shot of Brooklyn before heading backstage. The bigger matches get a quick look as someone spray paints the Summerslam logo onto a wall. That’s rather generic for the opening of such a big show.

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Corbin attacked Shinsuke Nakamura after Nakamura beat Cena, who made the save. Cena then cost Corbin his Money in the Bank cash-in to really hammer this home. The fans, ever so nice, ask Baron where his briefcase is. Cena slides outside to mock Corbin, even throwing on JBL’s hat. Well that makes any adult look like a moron so Corbin gives chase but Cena slides back in.

A headlock keeps Corbin on trouble as JBL points out the Cena issue with the crowd: they’re always chanting about him, whether it’s positive or negative. That’s not the best sign for the opponents, but at least Corbin had the chant to start the match. Some knees to the ribs put Cena in trouble and Corbin pops him in the jaw with a right hand.

The slide underneath the corner sets up the hard clothesline for two and Corbin is already looking frustrated. A suplex gets the same so it’s time to yell at the referee. Corbin hits a World’s Strongest Slam and we hit the chinlock. The fans ask about the briefcase again so Corbin says it’s on Cena. Another comeback starts up with the flying shoulders until Corbin slides under the ropes again, only to slide back in for a chokebreaker.

Cena blocks a superplex attempt and hits a tornado DDT, sending the fans right back into their chorus of booing. The AA is reversed into a Deep Six and Corbin can’t believe the kickout. He’s so serious that the shirt comes off and more slugging ensues. Cena sends him into the corner for the third slide but this time Corbin eats a big clothesline. The AA is good for the pin at 10:12.

Rating: D+. So that happened. The story wasn’t great, the action was nothing to see and Cena hit all of two moves to win in the end. Cena would go on to feud with Roman Reigns for the real rub, but that’s not the best way to boost Corbin. Just a complete nothing of a match here and it felt like they were getting it out of the way instead of featuring it, which is really weird to see for Cena.

Cena hugging kids and throwing his wristbands and dog tags is always cool to see. That just works.

Some wrestlers played Rocket League.

We recap Naomi vs. Natalya. Naomi won the title at Wrestlemania but Natalya thinks she’s turned it into a toy. Natalya attacked Becky Lynch after a match so Naomi made the save. This qualifies for the build to a title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Natalya vs. Naomi

Naomi is defending and gets slapped in the face at the bell but snaps off a hurricanrana to get herself out of trouble. A Blockbuster off the steps gives Naomi two more but Natalya posts her hard to take over. Back in and Natalya stomps away but the emotional offense has never been her strong suit. James Ellsworth and Miss Money in the Bank Carmella are watching in the back (she held that thing so long that she is still champion and Ellsworth has left, returned and left again in less than a year) as Natalya hits a running clothesline.

Naomi’s kicks to the legs don’t have much effect so Natalya grabs an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Natalya hits the discus lariat for two and loads up a superplex. Naomi slips out and hits a super Russian legsweep, which of course gets us to even despite both of them taking the same impact. A spinning kick to the head and a headscissors driver give Naomi two but the dancing kicks are shrugged off (as they should be) with Natalya dropkicking her in the face.

Natalya gets caught in the ropes though and a slingshot legdrop gives Naomi two. The reverse Rings of Saturn is countered into the Sharpshooter but Naomi pulls rolls through and sends Natalya head first into the buckle. Not that it matters though as the split legged moonsault misses, setting up another Sharpshooter to make Naomi tap at 10:50.

Rating: D+. I was bored during this as Natalya is a black hole of charisma and Naomi isn’t the best at being serious. The wrestling was dull too and there was nothing happening here to draw me in. It doesn’t help when the women’s division on both shows have been dominated by the Four Horsewomen for so long that it’s almost impossible to get invested in anyone else (though Naomi has come a long, long way in the last year).

Post match Naomi is rather depressed.

We recap Big Cass vs. Big Show. Cass and Enzo Amore have split up and Show is standing up for him. Tonight though Enzo is being locked in a cage (good start) and Show has a broken hand thanks to Cass crushing it in the shark cage.

Big Show vs. Big Cass

Before the match, Enzo makes various Brooklyn/New York City rap references. He talks about loving to talk and how his worst day is better than Cass’ best and Cass has no heart. Thankfully Cass comes out to cut off the never ending promo and Enzo goes up in the cage. Show, not being the brightest guy in the world, hits Cass with the broken hand as Enzo is already running his mouth. He dances in the cage a bit, shouting about having the best seat in the house.

Cass gets thrown around and kicked in the ribs and there’s the side slam, only to have Show bang up the hand again. Enzo shouts something about Patrick the Starfish as Show misses a Vader Bomb, injuring his hand again. Cass’ big boot is blocked by a weak KO punch for two but the second attempt hits Show’s chest. It’s time to start in on the hand even more, despite that not really doing anything that’s going to let Cass pin him. Something like an armbar has Enzo jumping up and down, further making me want to see him put inside a wood chipper.

The fans call the hold boring so Cass stops, poses, and puts it on again. Show throws him down and hits a left armed clothesline, followed by the chokeslam for two. The hand goes into the post as Enzo is leaning through the cage bars. With Show down, Enzo pulls off his pants and whips out a bottle of lubricant (there’s no way I’m touching that one), oils himself up, and gets out of the cage. The match completely stops until Enzo gets down so Cass can kick him in the face. A pair of big boots put Show down and the Empire Elbow is good for the pin at 10:29.

Rating: F+. What in the world was that supposed to be? This was all about the bad hand but somehow it became about Enzo, that loudmouthed idiot, and then Cass just wins clean. I have no idea how this was the best idea they had but it was an awful match and a big waste of time. If I ever see Enzo oiled up again, I’ll be off in the next room gouging my eyes out.

General Manager Kurt Angle and Daniel Bryan get in a YES/NO off about which show will be better for the rest of the night.

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Rusev jumps him from behind before the bell and Orton is in trouble. They get inside for the bell and it’s the RKO in ten seconds. That would be your “well the card is huge and we have to cut something” match of the night.

Bayley wishes Sasha Banks good luck tonight. Banks is taking her place due to a shoulder injury.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss

Banks is challenging and has special gear that makes her look like a peacock (so she’s copying Charlotte tonight). Bliss gets fired up to start and slugs away in the corner but Banks flips her around and hammers at the champ’s head. One heck of a forearm drops Banks and Bliss talks some trash. With the forearms boring her, Bliss pulls Banks’ hair around the ropes and crotches her on the middle rope for painful measure. We hit the chinlock as it’s almost all Bliss in the early going.

A lot more trash talk sets up a choke shove to put Banks down again as the fans are trying to get behind Banks. The middle rope knees into the moonsault knees give Bliss two more and she drops Banks on the back of her head for the same. Bliss goes to the middle rope and chokes some more until Banks slams her down. A dropkick and clothesline put the champ down for two but she knees Banks in the face to take over again. Bliss’ Code Red out of the corner is countered into something like an Alabama Slam, followed by just kneeing the heck out of Bliss in the corner.

The Bank Statement doesn’t work as Bliss is right next to the ropes. Bliss pulls her down into the ring skirt and dumps Banks to the floor for a near countout, with Bliss freaking out when she gets back in. Twisted Bliss only gets two more and now Bliss doesn’t know what to do. Since hitting it again is out of the question, Bliss picks her up and gets pulled down into the Bank Statement. Banks’ shoulder gives out so she tries the hold again and Bliss taps at 13:17.

Rating: C. Nothing much to see here with Banks shrugging off everything Bliss threw at her and winning without a ton of drama. Bliss got to show off the offense here and looked very good, though there’s not much she can do when Banks is on offense for all of a minute and a half and wins completely clean. Banks would lose the title just eight days later, continuing her trend of not being able to remain champion for very long.

Video on wrestlers auditioning to be the new Colonel Sanders. A fight breaks out and Shawn Michaels winds up winning in one of the most random, bizarre things you’ll ever see. Becky Lynch as the Colonel oddly works.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt. Bray had targeted Balor as his latest false idol, beat him on Raw, and covered him in fake blood. Balor then decided to bring the Demon back to fight as hard as he could. This worked in NXT but not up here and that was mainly for one reason: Cole explaining/hyping the Demon EVERY TWO FREAKING SECONDS, saying over and over that “the Demon is Finn Balor’s alter ego” because WWE doesn’t think its fans are that bright. I don’t think NXT ever actually explained it (if they did it was once) because they know how smart fans can be. And that’s why the Demon has never been back.

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt

Cole mentions the Demon idea again during Bray’s entrance but gets cut off as He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands starts playing for Finn. We get the big smoky entrance with Finn looking awesome and the camera getting an AWESOME shot of him with his back to the ring and the crowd posing with him. Balor gets to the ring and LET’S HIT THAT EXPLANATION again. Seriously it’s not exactly a character that needs to be broken down and it’s made worse when Cole does it.

Wyatt is hesitant to start and a right hand just ticks Balor off. Balor shows him how to throw some real right hands and Wyatt needs a breather on the floor. You don’t do that to Balor, who charges around the corner to drop Wyatt again. Back in and Balor isn’t phased by the upside down stare so Wyatt bails to the floor. This time it’s a big flip dive as it’s all Balor so far. Bray finally pulls him off the apron and hammers away, followed by something like a reverse Stunner out of the corner.

Of course that means a chinlock, because even though Bray is a cult leader, he still follows WWE wrestling tropes. Balor is right back up with a Pele kick and a baseball slide to the floor. The double stomp from the apron to Bray’s back keeps him in trouble, causing Graves to drop a (failed) external occipital protuberance reference. I knew I liked him for a reason.

Bray kicks him in the face and hits the release Rock Bottom for two. The running backsplash gets the same but Finn kicks him to the floor for the shotgun dropkick against the barricade. Back in and Bray scores with a kick so it’s spider walk time. Balor pops to his feet, hits a Sling Blade, another shotgun dropkick, and the Coup de Grace for the pin at 10:39.

Rating: D. This was as exciting as Bray hitting some basic offense while Balor did all of his usual stuff. The problem again is in the Demon, which was what Balor would bring out for his biggest, most violent fights. When it’s just the standard wrestling match and even a pretty dominant Finn performance, the whole Demon character is pretty much a waste.

Ad for the Mae Young Classic. In other words, the modern NXT women’s division.

We recap Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose vs. the Bar, which is built around the idea of Dean and Seth not being able to trust each other. They kept offering the Shield fist until they FINALLY got back together, mainly due to having to deal with the Bar. Now they’re united after a very well done series of segments that them saving each other but not being willing to trust each other. They got in a fight though and the Bar coming out to join in was FINALLY enough to get them to agree to fight together. This was actually a heck of a build and I got sucked into it, both live and again during the recap video.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending and it’s Sheamus getting taken down so the challengers can drop some elbows. Rollins Downward Spirals Cesaro into Dean’s boot and the champs are cleared out early on. A quick distraction lets Sheamus Brogue Kick Dean so Seth tries a suicide dive onto both guys. That gets him slammed down hard as momentum changes in a hurry.

We settle down to Cesaro gutwrench suplexing Seth and the chinlock goes on. Rollins fights back and hits a Blockbuster but Ambrose is still down off what is apparently the most devastating Brogue Kick of all time. Sheamus keeps Rollins in the corner as Cesaro runs into the crowd and destroys a beach ball, because Cesaro is more awesome than you. An enziguri gets Rollins out of trouble but this time it’s Cesaro cutting him off. Seth sends him outside though and Cesaro comes up holding his knee.

Rollins goes out after him with Sheamus following, meaning it’s Dean diving onto everyone at once. Back in and Rollins rolls underneath Cesaro and makes the hot tag to bring in Ambrose. Everything breaks down and Seth springboards in with a clothesline to Sheamus. There’s the double suicide dive and the fans are eating up all these double team spots. We settle down again with Ambrose powering out of the Neutralizer and hitting the rebound lariat, only to have Sheamus cut off the tag.

Ambrose catches him on top with a superplex into a very fast frog splash from Rollins but Cesaro makes the save. Rollins and Ambrose are tired of this tagging stuff and unload on Sheamus in the corner but he’s right back with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Cesaro swings Dean for all of two rotations and the Sharpshooter goes on, with Dean looking more surprised than in pain. With Dean getting close to the rope, Cesaro rolls over into a Crossface to change focal points.

Instead of going for the submission, Cesaro loads up a powerbomb with Sheamus adding a top rope clothesline for another close two. Rollins finally comes in and gets knocked outside just as fast. Dean tells the champs to bring it so they load up a spike White Noise. Hang on though as Rollins is right in there with a hurricanrana to send Cesaro into Dean and Sheamus for the save. The wind up knee into Dirty Deeds finishes Sheamus for the titles at 18:38.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but there was no other way to go with the finish. Rollins and Ambrose are a great team and the fans love them so let them have a long match and take the titles for a change. There was some chemistry here and that made for a good, long match that the show desperately needed.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens. They’ve traded the US Title for a few months now and Owens is claiming a conspiracy thanks to the referee missing his shoulder being up in the most recent title match. Therefore, Shane McMahon is guest referee tonight, despite having a history with AJ and a history of being a crooked referee.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

AJ is defending with Shane as guest referee. They get in a fight before the bell with Shane pulling them apart twice in a row, because Shane is going to be the focal point here. The bell rings and they fight out to the floor with AJ hitting a knee from the apron. Back in and AJ keeps him down, followed by a knee drop. One heck of a clothesline takes AJ’s head off and the Cannonball gets two.

The backsplash gets the same and the near fall off the Edge-O-Matic has Owens yelling at Shane. AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant and the fireman’s carry into a backbreaker gives him two of his own. They’re both banged up and the delay allows Owens to “accidentally” shove Shane into the ropes to crotch AJ on top. He’s fine enough for a springboard 450, which hits Shane after Owens pulls him in. For reasons of storyline convenience, AJ is down after splashing Shane, allowing Owens to hit the Pop Up Powerbomb for two, thanks to a delayed count.

That means ANOTHER argument with Shane, allowing AJ to grab the Calf Crusher but Owens pokes him in the eye. Owens sends AJ into Shane to knock him to the floor, meaning there’s no referee to see Owens tap to another Calf Crusher. Now it’s AJ’s turn to yell at Shane, who shoves AJ into a rollup for a pretty fast two. The annoyed AJ puts him on top, only to get caught in the swinging superplex for the big crash.

Owens wins a slugout but gets reversed into a Styles Clash for a clean two. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets three, though with AJ’s foot on the ropes at one. Shane: “TWO!” That means another argument with Shane, who shoves Owens into a rollup for two, meaning they’re not repeating spots from earlier in the match. The Phenomenal Forearm into the Styles Clash retains AJ’s title at 17:23.

Rating: B-. Well of course most of the match was about Shane, because that’s what a Summerslam title match should be about. The wrestling was fine but you kept waiting on Shane to do something else. I’m not sure how this was the best they could do with Styles, but at least there’s an Owens vs. Shane story set up for the next eight months. That’s more important than the US Title and Summerslam right?

Video on some fans winning a sweepstakes and got to go to the show.

We recap Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal and I can feel the headache coming. Mahal won the WWE Championship in a period of Vince McMahon insanity and has held it since May. Nakamura has hit Kinshasa on a bunch of people, including Cena to become #1 contender. In other words: help us Shinsuke Nakamura. You’re our only hope.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Nakamura is challenging and a live violinist plays him to the ring. The fans singing the song is awesome as usual, especially when you consider it doesn’t have words. Jinder grabs a wristlock to start so Nakamura spins around into a headlock, much to the crowd’s delight. Nakamura puts him up against the ropes for the arm shaking and the required COME ON. Mahal bails to the floor so it’s a triple COME ON, including the Singh Brothers. The fans chant for 3MB because the comedy version of Mahal is better than the main event version.

With nothing else going on, let’s go to the Japanese commentary team. I don’t speak Japanese so it’s all Greek to me. Back in and Nakamura drops a knee and hits some Good Vibrations as Mahal has nothing. As in all together, not just so far. The Singh Brothers offer a distraction though and Mahal knocks him off the apron to take over for the first time. Some knee drops set up a chinlock, followed by Mahal doing the COME ON pose but shouting his own name.

After that brilliant display of saying his name, it’s back to the chinlock. Nakamura fights up with a kick to the face and some YES Kicks to set up the running knee to the ribs. With the covers not working, Nakamura grabs a triangle choke but Mahal gets his foot in the ropes. Nakamura’s running knee in the corner hits buckle and Mahal adds a jumping knee to the face for two of his own. Mahal goes shoulder first into the post but the Singh Brothers’ distraction lets Mahal hit a chinlock slam (he has ONE MOVE and can’t even do that right) to retain at 11:25.

Rating: D-. You know, it’s been about nine months since Mahal lost the title and e-freaking-gads I had forgotten how awful his title reign really was. This felt like a bad house show main event and it’s the biggest Smackdown match on the second biggest show of the year. You can feel the fans dying out there when Mahal is….well doing anything actually, but in this case I’ll go with being on offense and winning. I remember watching Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura beat the living tar out of each other for twenty minutes at Takeover: Dallas. Now though, a weak/botched/terrible cobra clutch slam puts him down? Not a chance.

We recap the Universal Title match with Brock Lesnar defending against Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and Samoa Joe. Lesnar was announced as facing all three challengers and since he wasn’t happy, he’s threatened to leave WWE if he loses. The three challengers all say they can be the man to take out Lesnar. There’s just not much else to be said here but this is by far and away the main event.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman vs. Samoa Joe

Lesnar is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Cole picks Reigns to win because Reigns beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Cole: “How can you bet against that?” You pick the guy who did it first, you nitwit. Reigns is of course booed out of the building because….oh you know the drill by now.

The brawl is on to start (well duh) with Strowman throwing Reigns to the floor and Brock hitting a belly to belly on Joe. Strowman gets posted and it’s time for the Reigns vs. Lesnar showdown that no one but WWE seems to love. Booker tries to say that Lesnar knew nothing but winning in UFC, which I’ll leave you to make fun of. Some suplexes put Reigns on the floor and it’s Strowman time.

Now THIS gets the fans’ attention but Reigns and Joe are right back in to break up the fun. That lasts all of five seconds before it’s back to Strowman vs. Lesnar, meaning another YES chant. Strowman LAUNCHES Brock into the corner and hits a heck of a clothesline to put the champ on the floor. As usual, Lesnar’s selling is very underrated. Everyone is on the floor now and Joe chokes Lesnar but sidesteps a Reigns spear, sending Lesnar through the barricade. That spot will always look cool.

Strowman is back up and loads up the title (with Graves hoping he uses Saxton as a weapon), setting up a running powerslam to drive a kicking Lesnar through it. The fans REALLY like that but here’s Reigns to kick Strowman in the face and kill their buzz all over again. Joe is back up with a suicide elbow to take Reigns out, meaning the fans are won right back. Thankfully Cole is doing a great job of explaining how cool it is to see people this big doing this stuff.

That’s exactly what he should be doing and it’s working here. Strowman throws an announcers’ chair at Joe and Reigns in a cool spot, followed by a second powerslam through a table to put Lesnar down again. Heyman has a look on his face that says “well, I didn’t see that one coming”. Fans: “ONE MORE TABLE!” Greedy twits. To mix things up a bit, Strowman picks that one up and turns it on top of the already out Lesnar. Half a dozen people come out to get the table off of Lesnar and a stretcher is brought out as Heyman seems to be near tears.

We’re not done yet though as Strowman hits Joe and Reigns in the head with the steps. With the steps in the ring, Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines and hits a good steps shot into Strowman’s shoulder. Joe’s rollup gets two on Reigns but he’s right back up with a Samoan drop for two. The Superman Punch is countered into the Koquina Clutch but Strowman (with some blood next to his ear) is back in with a double chokeslam. Everyone is down so here comes Lesnar again.

Strowman is the only one on his feet so it’s time for the big showdown. A running clothesline takes Strowman to the floor and there’s a German suplex each to Joe and Reigns. Strowman comes back in and elbow his way out of a German suplex, only to get caught in the Kimura. That’s broken up with a Superman Punch, with Joe and Lesnar taking one each as well. Reigns spears Lesnar for two so here’s Strowman for a dropkick to Reigns, just because he can do that too.

The powerslam gets two on Joe with Lesnar pulling the referee out at the last second. A Superman Punch gets two on Strowman, whose kickout puts Reigns on his feet. There’s a powerslam to Reigns with Lesnar making the save but getting loaded up into the F5. That’s broken up by a Reigns spear, drawing Joe back in for a Clutch on Lesnar. Brock reverses into the F5 but Reigns is right in there with some Superman Punches. Three in a row put Lesnar down but the spear is countered into the F5 to retain Brock’s title at 20:53.

Rating: A-. What a fight and that’s all it needed to be. They were making Godzilla/King Kong references here and they nailed the idea to near perfection. The best thing here was Strowman looking awesome and like the man that could beat Lesnar if he had the chance, with the bonus of Reigns taking the fall again. It’s not like Reigns losing was going to hurt him (it hasn’t yet) so going this was was the right call. This was all about violence and that was the story: big, strong people beating each other up for twenty minutes and all of the chaos that it caused. Well done, all around.

Lesnar can barely stand to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show suffered from the same problem as the modern Wrestlemania. It’s not the length that is the problem (the show never really did drag) but rather that almost nothing has a chance to sink in. Everything jumped from one match to the other and most of the matches didn’t have a ton of time.

It was “well that happened so let’s move on” time after time and that doesn’t make for a special show. The show isn’t terrible but aside from the main event, nothing on here felt important and that’s not what Summerslam needs to be. In other words: cut some stuff out and let it breathe, which might as well be the standard operating criticism around here.

Ratings Comparison

Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Original: C-
Redo: C

Neville vs. Akira Tozawa

Original: C

Redo: C+

New Day vs. Usos

Original: B+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Original: D

Redo: D+

Naomi vs. Natalya

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Big Cass vs. Big Show

Original: D

Redo: F+

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B-

Redo: C

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

Redo: D

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs. The Bar

Original: B

Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe vs. Braun Strowman

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: C-

Time has NOT been kind to this show and aside from two (or maybe three) matches, it’s not worth seeing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/08/20/summerslam-2017-the-star-of-stars/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2016 (2017 Redo): We Have A New Hero

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,974
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

A year has passed since I saw this show and I can barely remember much about it. That’s very telling when you look at how stacked this show really is. There are multiple top level matches here and it really wasn’t clear what was going to close the show until the night of the event. Hopefully that means that this SIX HOUR show holds up. Let’s get to it.

So here’s a quick plug. I’m going through the pre-show and there’s a three expert panel of Booker T., Jerry Lawler and Lita. Earlier this year, I met all three of them at WrestleCon. If you’re ever at a Wrestlemania weekend, treat yourself to an amazing time and GO TO WRESTLECON. I met over 120 wrestlers in about four hours. Where else are you going to get to do something like that? Anyway, on with the show.

Pre-Show: American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Who would have thought that Breezango would be the most entertaining out of all these teams? This is pretty much the still titleless Smackdown tag division at this point as they had to bring in the Headbangers and throw together Heath Slater and Rhyno to be able to have a tournament. This is also a rematch from Smackdown, which shows how little effort they were putting into the tag division at this point.

Gable and Breeze start things and the fans are WAY into Gable. Chad twists around as only he can to escape a wristlock and it’s off to Jey, who is quickly driven into the corner. English comes in and says that he’s what a man is. That earns him a right hand to the jaw and it’s off to Mojo to work on a wristlock. Ryder comes in to quite the reaction as Mauro says the Hype Bros have more chemistry than the Periodic Table.

Everything breaks down (What took them so long?) and Ascension clears the ring, only to have American Alpha come off the top (the same corner) with double clotheslines (that’s pure Steiner Brothers). English posts Ryder though and we take a break. Back with Gotch putting Ryder in a chinlock, followed by Viktor doing the same. The other heels take turns stomping on Ryder until Breeze grabs his own chinlock. Fandango adds a slingshot legdrop as this is going WAY longer than it needs to.

JBL thinks cold beer uniting the APA is more effective than furry selfie sticks uniting Breezango but maybe he’s wrong. Ascension knocks the good guys off the apron but Viktor misses a charge in the corner, allowing Ryder to get in a neckbreaker on Konnor. The hot tag (with a limited reaction) brings in Jimmy to clean house.

Jordan gets the real hot tag and does his fired up sequence (which he really is awesome at) with a belly to belly getting two on Breeze. We hit the parade of secondary finishers as the referee is imploring them to tag. Mojo powerbombs Breeze and Viktor out of the corner and the Usos add stereo superkicks to set up stereo dives. Back in and Grand Amplitude plants Gotch, only to have Jey tag himself in for a Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:31. Gable is really not cool with that. Eh just wait until your team is split up for a pretty lame story where Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a few minutes from this, it’s a heck of an opener. There are too many people in the match of course but they kept it moving fast enough (for the most part) to really get something fun out of it. Jordan’s house cleaning spot is a heck of a way to fire the crowd up and it made the match more fun than it should have been. Tweak this a bit (eight/ten man tag or shorten the match a bit) and it’s even better.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Sami works on D-Von’s arm to start and it’s off to Neville for more of the same. Both of them get in more shots as we hear about the rivalry over the NXT Title. I do appreciate the history, especially when Graves should know about that match very well. Bubba is sent outside but D-Von breaks up a springboard dive, allowing Bubba to nail Neville from behind to take over. The fans want tables but a back elbow to Neville’s jaw cuts them off in a hurry.

Back from a break with Bubba hitting his neckbreaker out of the corner. Things slow down even more as Bubba is talking even more than he usually does in a match. Bubba: “COME ON ENGLISH BOY! O-LAY! O-LAY!” The middle rope backsplash misses though and the hot tag brings in Sami. D-Von takes the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but the reverse 3D gets the same. Neville escapes the regular version though and we get some heel miscommunication. The Helluva Kick sets up the Red Arrow to put Bubba away at 7:55.

Rating: C-. That would be it for the Dudleys in WWE as they would have one more segment tomorrow night where Anderson and Gallows sent them packing. It’s also pretty much it for Sami and Neville as a team, which is quite odd as you would think they would be a fine choice for a team. The match was nothing you wouldn’t expect on Raw.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

You know, because two matches just weren’t enough for the pre-show. This is the first match of the Best of Seven Series, which really wasn’t too well received. After Cole says Cesaro is facing Cesaro and both Cole and Saxton say this is about establishing physical dominance, we’re ready to go. Sheamus misses a very early Brogue Kick but the spinning springboard uppercut is blocked as well.

Cesaro charges into an uppercut but comes back with a dropkick for one. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up so Sheamus clotheslines him onto the apron instead. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s chronically taped up shoulder but Cesaro lifts him up into that kind of reverse Angle Slam of his. They’re certainly hitting each other hard here, which is pretty much the draw of the whole feud.

Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and it’s off to a break. Back with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock because that rule even applies on pre-shows that will never end. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two as Cole runs down the pay per view card, which only makes me think that there are FAR too many titles in WWE. They fight over a suplex and fall out to the floor in a heap. Back in and Cesaro starts firing off the running uppercuts in the corner, capped off by a dropkick to knock him off the ropes.

The apron superplex (which wasn’t from the apron) gets two but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for two. There’s the super Regal Roll for two more and frustration is really setting in. Another Brogue Kick attempt is countered by one heck of a clothesline though and Cesaro adds a high crossbody for two of his own. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter but Sheamus gets to the ropes. Back up and a poke to the eye sets up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 14:11.

Rating: B. They beat the heck out of each other and it was a fun match but it also brings up the problem: I’m not going to want to watch them fight six more times. No matter how good things are, having them happen so many times in a row over several weeks is going to get tiresome. It happens in all these series and it’s happening here too.

And now, after more wrestling than you get on an average Smackdown, here’s the actual pay per view.

The opening video looks at New York City, with the narrator telling you how AMAZING the city is. I’m not sure if New York City or Texas is worse about bragging about their home’s greatness. As usual, this switches over to a series of quick looks at the biggest matches on the card.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Well duh. That’s about as easy of a choice for an opener as you could ever find for this show. As you might expect, the crowd eats up the opening promo with a spoon and of course we hear a ton of New York City music references. Included are Frank Sinatra, Biggie Smalls and Jay-Z, plus more that probably go over my head. Cass adds in a few songs of his own as this is the only way this show could have opened. Since Graves is the best heel commentator in wrestling today though, he points out that Enzo is from New Jersey.

Jericho and Owens jump Enzo at the bell and the STUPID IDIOT chants start rolling. Enzo comes back with a crossbody and a running right hand to the jaw for two. It’s off to Cass, who drags Owens inside for a beal. That’s some scary power. Enzo gets launched into the corner to crush Jericho but the Canadians bail to the floor. That’s fine with Cass who tosses Enzo over the top onto them in a huge crash. I’ve always loved that spot as it just looks cool.

Back in and Enzo ax handles Owens but turns into a middle rope dropkick from Jericho. The Canadian violence begins with Owens kneeing Enzo from the apron and doing his dance on the apron in a rather funny visual. Owens’ comedic skills aren’t given enough credit more often than not. It’s back to Jericho for the Arrogant Cover and a chinlock with Owens telling Jericho to do it like he taught him.

Owens comes in and adds a gutbuster for two, followed by the running start for a chinlock. It takes real talent to turn a chinlock into an art form but Owens has somehow pulled it off. Enzo finally rolls away but Jericho is there to break up the diving tag attempt. Owens drops the frog splash for two and his stunned looked on the kickout is the usual awesome visual. Enzo gets pulled off the corner to make things even worse but, after blowing a kiss to Jericho, misses the Cannonball.

That means the hot tag to Cass and everything breaks down. Jericho dives into a big boot but Owens breaks up the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka. Cass gets posted on the floor and now the Cannonball against the barricade connects. Back in and Enzo scores with his top rope DDT on Jericho with Owens making the save. A pop up Codebreaker (didn’t look great as Jericho was too far away) ends Enzo at 12:09.

Rating: C+. Odd choice for an ending aside (not surprising of course but odd), this was a good way to get the crowd going. I could have gone for another hope spot from Enzo and more of Cass cleaning house but that pop up Codebreaker could have been a heck of a finisher if done right. Nice opener, though would it have killed them to put Enzo and Cass over in Brooklyn?

Smackdown bosses Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon run into Raw General Manager Mick Foley to brag about how awesome their shows are. Former Daily Show host Jon Stewart and his son come in to ask what Foley is thinking to work with Stephanie. He rants about abuse of power but realizes she’s right behind him. Stephanie yells at him about how great it is to abuse power but thankfully New Day comes up. As the Smackdown bosses and Foley much on cereal, New Day asks Jon if he’d like to do something. He gets out as fast as he can and Stephanie isn’t amused.

We recap Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Sasha won the Women’s Title on the first exclusive show after the Brand Split and tonight is the rematch. The other big idea here is Charlotte never loses singles matches on pay per view and Banks has to recreate the magic one more time.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Banks is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Some early WOOing sets up a slightly less early Bank Statement but Charlotte bails to the floor. Back in and Banks climbs the corner for a wristdrag before sending Charlotte face first into the middle buckle. Banks gets caught on top though and Charlotte basically drops her onto the ropes for a backbreaker which almost had to hurt horribly. The fact that Banks had a bad back coming in and Charlotte still did some rather sloppy moves like that got her in some hot water.

We hit a Gory Stretch on the champ for a bit but she comes back with a pair of running clotheslines. That just earns her another backbreaker and Charlotte stomps away at the back. The Figure Eight is broken up but Sasha misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Charlotte picks her up for a super Razor’s Edge but since that would, you know, kill Sasha, she reverses into a hurricanrana to put them both down.

Back up and a WOO earns Charlotte a string of slaps before Sasha avoids a charge in the corner and hits the double knees to the back for two. Charlotte kicks her in the leg to break up a charge but gets knocked outside again, setting up the double knees from the apron. Back in and the Backstabber doesn’t work but Natural Selection is countered into the Bank Statement (thankfully too as the Natural Selection clearly didn’t send Sasha’s head anywhere near the mat).

Charlotte makes the rope for the break and takes out the knee again. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two so she yells about being better than Sasha. Another Bank Statement goes on but Charlotte reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 13:52. Saxton: “Just like that?”

Rating: B. This was just a straight match and that’s the key to the whole thing. The women are getting to show that they can have a good match without the smoke and mirrors, which never would have been the case otherwise. If nothing else it got the kind of time that a title match deserves to develop the story of Banks having a bad back (which would keep her on the shelf for about a month). Strong match here and another of many to come for these two.

Doctors Anderson and Gallows (oh man I had forgotten how stupid this was) run into AJ Styles for a Club reunion. Finn Balor comes up and doesn’t think much of it. Somehow, this has still never gone anywhere.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending after winning a triple threat match. Miz comes out wearing a glittery Phantom of the Opera mask while Maryse is basically in a one piece swimsuit. In a sign of the changing times, Mauro talks about Miz’s look instead of Maryse. Miz stomps away in the corner and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Crews gets the same off a rollup, only to walk into the short DDT as it’s almost all Miz to start. We’re already in the reverse chinlock before Miz sends him into the apron to cut off a comeback. Miz takes too long coming off the top though and dives into a dropkick to put both guys down.

A crossbody into a nipup has Miz in trouble as JBL rants about Otunga calling Crews a Jackrobat (jacked acrobat). The Toss Powerbomb is countered so Crews gets two off a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. An overhead belly to belly sets up a standing moonsault, which Otunga sums up perfectly: “A man with that kind of size and that kind of muscle should not be able to do that.” Miz teases taking a walk but Maryse cuts him off, allowing Miz to post Crews. The Skull Crushing Finale retains the title at 5:36.

Rating: D+. Standard Smackdown match and something that could have been cut, or at least put in the Kickoff Show in the place of the Dudleys match. Crews felt like an easy obstacle to overcome because there was nowhere near enough build to set the match up. Put some more effort into the title already people, as it’s just not working.

We recap John Cena vs. AJ Styles. They set up the first match when Styles and Cena were in the ring together, only to have Anderson and Gallows interfere to turn Styles heel. Styles went on a great rant about how Cena was a fraud who couldn’t hang in the ring with someone like him. Cena went into a great speech about how he’s here out of love because it never gets old. AJ beat him at Money in the Bank with assistance from Anderson and Gallows, setting up a rematch between the two here.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This just feels big. AJ grabs a waistlock to start but is easily knocked away. The announcers go out of the way to put over how AJ has been on big shows before but nothing this big. Oh I don’t know. I remember him being at that Wrestlemania thing earlier in the year. The dueling chants begin and the AJ STYLES side is pretty clearly stronger.

Cena’s headlock is countered and AJ scores with the dropkick but the bragging earns AJ a right to the jaw. A hard whip into the corner sends AJ down for a bit with Cena doing some rare trash talking. They head to the floor and the fans start belting out JOHN CENA SUCKS, only to have AJ turn it into some gasping with a suplex onto the apron. Cena is right back with a dropkick for two and it’s time for some more right hands to the head.

AJ comes back with a forearm to the face, earning himself Cena’s finishing sequence. It’s way too early for the AA though as AJ hits a Pele, followed by the Styles Clash for a close two. The fans were actually more into the near fall than I was expecting as you would think they’d know better this early. The AA gives Cena two of his own and both guys are down again.

Styles slips out of the super AA and grabs the torture rack for the spinout powerbomb. They’re trading bombs at this point and it’s the only way they should be going here. Something like a Big Ending gives Cena two but he can’t get the STF. Instead it’s the AA neckbreaker for two on Cena (not the same as the AA JBL) but the springboard 450 only hits mat.

A faceplant puts Cena down again though and AJ can’t follow up. He manages the springboard forearm but Cena reverses into the worst STF I’ve ever seen. Thankfully AJ slips out and grabs a Crossface, which Cena powers out of as well. That’s reversed into the Calf Crusher which AJ is smart enough to twist away from the ropes. Cena reverses that into another horrible STF (AJ’s face is on the mat) so AJ is quickly up with the enziguri. A tornado DDT plants AJ and there’s the top rope Fameasser for two.

Cena heads up again and gets taken down with a super hurricanrana (Mauro: “MAMA MIA!”), followed by the Phenomenal Forearm for a VERY near fall (drawing Mauro to his feet). It’s Cena’s turn now as he takes AJ up for the super AA and….it’s two. NOW the fans know it’s on as I don’t think anyone has ever kicked out of that before. Cena is stunned and the AA is countered into another Clash. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Cena away clean at 23:10.

Rating: A. I know it’s not going to sound good but a lot of this goes to Cena. At the end of the day, the crowd completely lost it when AJ kicked out of that super AA. AJ wins here not because he got a pin but because he beat Cena clean. That’s a very, VERY short list and that’s what makes it feel so important. Think back to how big of a deal it was when Warrior pinned Hogan clean. That felt like an era changing win, and while this isn’t quite that big, it’s the same idea.

Oh yeah and it’s an outstanding match and possibly the Match of the Year. This was the heavyweight slugfest formula as they beat the heck out of each other with both guys hitting everything they could until one of them couldn’t get up. That’s a really hard match to pull off and these two did it in an incredible match. It belonged on the grand stage and gives Cena one heck of a mountain to overcome, which he somehow did in a better match at the Royal Rumble.

Post match Cena takes off his wristband and leaves it in the ring. He would do dark matches for a few weeks and then be back wrestling on TV in less than a month so this didn’t mean anything.

Some fans won a contest and got some stuff. In other words, let the fans have a breather.

Here’s Jon Stewart for your celebrity appearance. He makes fun of himself for interfering in Cena’s match last year and says the big lesson he learned was to tuck your shirt in when you’re taking an AA. As for tonight though, he’s here to be in New Day’s corner to help deal with Anderson and Gallows. In honor of the moment, he throws on a unicorn horn and does Big E.’s (out injured due to getting crotched against the post) entrance.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course and unfortunately Anderson and Gallows are still doing their stupid doctor nonsense, complete with jars for Kofi, Xavier and Jon’s testicles. I hear Paige can help you with one of those. Anderson headlocks Kofi down to start but he’s right back up with the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Kofi flips onto his feet and gets two off the standing double stomp. You can tell the fans are still recovering from the previous match and it’s off to Woods.

That goes badly as the he gets taken into the corner for a beating from Gallows. At least it does bring the fans back a bit with the rhythmic clapping. Gallows gets taken into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede (which they’ve kind of stopped doing in recent months) and the fans are really not responding. Woods sends him outside so Kofi can hit a running dive (while posing in the air) to take him down again. Back in and Gallows kicks Kofi in the head to take over for real this time with Anderson working on the arm.

That goes nowhere as the hot tag brings in Woods to clean house. Anderson sends him to the apron for an enziguri, setting up the rope walk elbow drop. Everything breaks down and Anderson kicks Kofi in the chest, setting up the Magic Killer. Stewart gets in though and it’s time to crotch him as well. Hang on though as he has to tuck in his shirt first. Cue the returning Big E. for the save though and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D. I don’t know if it was the previous match or what but sweet goodness the fans did NOT care for this one. It’s not a good match in the first place as Anderson and Gallows aren’t funny in the doctor roles, but the bigger problem here was the focus being on Stewart at the end. Oh and the ending sets up a rematch, which really isn’t what they need to be going with here. Bad match but Big E.’s return did wake up the crowd.

Big E. drinks the fluid in the jar holding his “testicles”. Stewart dances with New Day and the fans…well they care when Big E. dances at least.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph won a six way match to earn the shot and then it all went nuts. Ziggler started talking about how he was tired of being told that he always either too good or not good enough. It was time to turn up the jets and become champion for the third time. Serious Ziggler was nice but I don’t think anyone was buying him as having a real chance here. You know, because he’s Dolph Ziggler.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is defending and Shane and Daniel are here for no apparent reason. The fans are behind Ziggler and they trade some grappling on the mat with Ziggler getting the better of it (not exactly a surprise). The threat of a neckbreaker sends Ambrose bailing to the floor so Dolph splashes him against the barricade.

Back in and Ziggler’s jumping DDT is countered with Dean throwing him outside again. Ziggler escapes a super Dirty Deeds so Dean slaps on a half crab of all things. You can tell Dean is playing the subtle heel here as the smark crowd is always going to cheer for Ziggler. Dean heads up top and gets dropkicked out of the air but he’s right back with a double chickenwing facebuster.

Ambrose tunes up the band (which is now mocking Ziggler instead of anything involving Shawn Michaels) but shakes his head and tries Dirty Deeds instead. That’s reversed into the jumping DDT and both guys are down again. A double collision gives us another lay down period until Dean is up first and hammering away.

The top rope elbow gets two so Ziggler grabs the sleeper, earning them both a tumble out to the floor. Ziggler gets in the superkick on the floor but it’s barely two back inside. The Zig Zag gets the same but Dean pops back up with the rebound lariat. Ziggler catches Dean on top and pulls him back down, right into Dirty Deeds to retain the title at 15:22.

Rating: D+. And that people, is Ziggler choking again. This would lead to him saying he’s never won the big one, which would turn into him never holding the World Title that long because holding the title is more important than winning it. The match was nothing all that good as we were just waiting on Dirty Deeds, which only happened so Dean could keep it warm for AJ next month. That was completely obvious the second AJ pinned Cena again and that’s all this title needed to do.

Package on Summerslam weekend.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Eva Marie vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Dang I didn’t know the Glow was a year old. Actually hang on a minute as Eva Marie is suffering from exhaustion, anxiety and stress (likely brought on by reading too many Wellness Violation messages, which meant she would never wrestle again) so we have a replacement. At least we got that amazing entrance one more time.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

So yeah, you know full well that Nikki is going to be all that matters in this match because IT’S HER BIG COMEBACK THAT EVERYONE TOTALLY CARES ABOUT BECAUSE WE LOVE HER SO MUCH! She does get one heck of a pop though, which is rather scary. During her entrance, Mauro declares her return “miraculous”. Oh man this is going to be a long one.

Bliss rolls Becky up to start and gets in a hard slap for good measure. Naomi comes in to scare Alexa off so it’s Natalya instead. A forearm puts Natalya down and the splits legdrop gets two. Carmella comes in for the Staten Island Shuffle before a missed charge sends Natalya outside. Back in and a powerslam out of the corner plants Carmella before it’s off to Nikki, the heel, for a strong face pop.

We hit the chinlock but hang on as we need some Nikki pushups. Alexa chokeshoves Carmella down for the moonsault knees to the ribs as the crowd is dead all over again. The abdominal stretch keeps things slow until Carmella finally rolls over and makes the hot tag to Becky. All three heels are send into the corner for the springboard kicks from Lynch, followed by a Bexploder on Natalya.

Becky’s top rope legdrop gets two with Nikki making the save. A blind tag brings in Naomi for the dancing kicks with the fans just not reacting at all. Bliss’ springboard splash hits knees so it’s off to Nikki vs. Carmella. A bad looking Bronco Buster gets two on Nikki and everything breaks down. Nikki’s big forearm sets up the Rack Attack 2.0 (Nikki: “I’m back.”) for the pin at 11:16.

Rating: D. This was all about Nikki’s return and that’s not enough to carry a dull match. Naomi’s Glow stuff wasn’t over yet, Becky was stuck around people who weren’t up to her level and Carmella was showing that she didn’t need to be on the main roster yet. The same was true for Alexa and Natalya was her usual self. Just not a good match and it showed the lack of depth to the division.

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Rusev and Lana were married and so Reigns interrupted for no apparent reason to insult them and shove them into a cake.

Maria Menunos interviews Rusev and Lana, who don’t like her questions about Reigns. They won’t stand for this and Lana is sure that her husband will destroy Reigns.

We recap the Universal Title match. Basically we need a new title due to the Brand Split and Universal Title was the best they could come up with. Seth Rollins was put into the match as Raw’s #1 draft pick and Finn Balor earned his way in by winning a series of matches. Not much else to it as there’s no major animosity between them but it’s better than pulling the title out of a suitcase.

Seth did get in a great promo talking about how he’s done everything Balor has done but he’s done it a little bit better. He’s not wrong, though that’s not the best thing to do when you have someone so new to the main roster. Then Balor showed up as the Demon and scared Rollins to death.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes and the title (which isn’t that well received due to a bad case of being hideous) is vacant coming in. Unless I’m forgetting something, to date this is the only time Balor has wrestled as the Demon on the main roster. We get the Big Match Intros and the title itself receives some hearty boos. Balor dropkicks him into the corner at the bell but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace.

Instead Balor hits a suicide dive to the floor, followed by some kicks to the knee back inside. They head outside again with Seth getting in his first offense via a suplex on the floor. Balor is right back with something like a Phenomenal Forearm off the barricade. Back in again and Balor hits a basement dropkick for two as this is almost one sided so far. Finn stays on the leg as the fans are singing something.

Balor jumps over the ropes but Rollins slides between his legs and powerbombs him into the barricade, completely destroying Balor’s shoulder and putting him on the shelf for the better part of eight months. We’re less than four minutes in though and you can see the shoulder looking all messed up. Back in and Seth gets two off a backbreaker, setting up a chinlock. The chants are still going and it sounds like THAT TITLE SUCKS to the tune of John Cena Sucks.

Seth starts the trash talk and cuts off a comeback attempt. A snapmare into a kick to the back has Finn in even more trouble but Seth would rather walk around than follow up. It’s back to the chinlock for a good while until the springboard knee to the head sets up Seth’s frog splash for two. What looks like a Rainmaker is countered into a DDT to give Balor his first major offense in a long time and he follows up with some forearms.

A basement dropkick sets up the Sling Blade but Seth kicks him down without much effort. An enziguri stuns Balor but he’s right back with the Pele, earning a very nice round of applause. If nothing else the chants about the title have stopped. 1916 (reverse implant DDT) gives Finn two but the Coup de Grace is countered into a triangle choke of all things. Finn falls outside because rope breaks don’t count (anything goes remember) and things slow down a bit.

Back in and the buckle bomb sets up the low superkick for two on Balor with Seth looking stunned on the kickout. A small package driver gets the same count and reaction so Seth goes up, allowing Balor to hit a very loud enziguri to put him on the floor. Balor adds a shotgun dropkick to send him into the barricade, followed by a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for two. The Coup de Grace misses and it’s a Pedigree for two. Finn counters a second Pedigree into a double stomp, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 19:23.

Rating: B+. When you factor in that shoulder injury, this is quite the impressive performance. Above all else though, how good is it that Balor won the title here? If he loses his first major pay per view match and then goes away until April, he’s lucky to come back to the cruiserweight division.

This was a heck of a match with both guys beating the heck out of each other. It took some time to get built up but once they finally got there, the fans really started to accept things, which is a very positive sign. Balor is someone who is going to get a very positive reaction no matter what and giving him the title here was entirely the right call.

Balor can barely move his right arm after the match but finally holds the title up. On his WWE 24 special, he said you could feel and hear the shoulder crunching and crackling as he lifted the title and it probably did more damage to the arm.

The pre-show channel chats a bit and throws us to a KFC ad with Dolph Ziggler dressing up as Colonel Sanders to beat up Miz dressed as a chicken. It’s actually dumber than you remember it being.

Here’s Lana to introduce Rusev, albeit while wearing half of a wedding dress, the bottom of which looks like a diaper. She’s one of the most beautiful women on the roster but she looks ridiculous here.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is challenging and the booing is strong with this one. Rusev jumps him before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Roman being sent into the steps. The fans chant RUSEV MACHKA because they’ve given up on America over their hatred for Reigns. Roman gets in a Superman Punch as the bell hasn’t rung yet. They fight over a chair with Reigns getting the better of it and destroying Rusev. Reigns finally leaves but comes back with a spear, all while the fans chant WE WANT SLATER. No match of course, likely due to time issues.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar. This match was announced as Orton’s return match from surgery and the build focused on Orton being able to hit the RKO anytime, including a sweet moment where Orton interrupted a Lesnar promo with an RKO. The hype video even includes some OVW clips as they came up through developmental together and debuted within a few months of each other. This had a heck of a build and felt like something important but the question was whether Lesnar would have an actual match or just do his usual Lesnar stuff.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introduction, saying he’s conquering out of the University of Suplex City. Brock seems to get into his MMA stance to start before driving Orton into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Orton escapes the first German suplex attempt but can’t hit the RKO.

Now the first suplex connects (with Mauro knowing that it’s the 33rd Lesnar has hit at Summerslam because he’s awesome that way) and Brock follows with two more. Orton is almost out on his feet so Lesnar suplexes him again. It’s nothing but suplexes at this point and it’s already getting dull. They head outside for a much needed change of pace with Orton being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton gets thrown from the front row through the table as this is dominance. The other table is loaded up but whatever Lesnar is trying is countered into the RKO onto (not through) the table. The hanging DDT plants Lesnar back inside and another RKO gets two. Orton realizes he has no choice and tries the Punt, only to have it reversed into the F5 (bad one) for two more.

That’s enough for Lesnar so he takes off the gloves and pads and hammers on Orton. An elbow to the head actually busts Orton open VERY badly. Lesnar just keeps hammering on him while the fans chant GOLDBERG until the referee FINALLY stops it at 11:47. I’ve heard a bunch of answers about what happened but I believe this was the planned ending and a hard way opening.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work when it happened and it didn’t work again this time around. Lesnar suplexing Orton for five minutes then selling a few big moves doesn’t make me think it’s an awesome main event. This was everything wrong with Lesnar’s current WWE run in one match and that made for a really dull match, save for the odd finish that seemed designed to protect Orton. You know, after he was basically squashed.

Lesnar keeps hammering on him until the always intimidating Shane McMahon comes out, earning himself an F5 (which thankfully didn’t lead anywhere). Heyman panics as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut an hour (or more) out of this, it’s bordering on the classic level. As it is, this is just a good show that runs WAY too long. At some point you have to cut something out and WWE just refuses to do that. Cut out the Dudleys match or the women’s tag and give us some breathing room here because sweet goodness this show could use it.

Now that being said, there’s some outstanding stuff on here with the Styles vs. Cena match as an instant classic, the Women’s Title being very good, a great Universal Title match and really only the Tag Team Title match being without much value. The show is certainly good and the positives outweigh the negatives but unless the show is a masterpiece, fans are going to start losing interest near the end. It’s a solid show but cut out a good forty minutes to really make it great.

Ratings Comparison

American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Original: C

2017 Redo: B-

Dudley Boyz vs. Neville/Sami Zayn

Original: C

2017 Redo: C-

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

2017 Redo: B

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

Original: C+

2017 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Original: B

2017 Redo: B

Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Original: C

2017 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A

2017 Redo: A

New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

2017 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Original: C

2017 Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

2017 Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

2017 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

2017 Redo: B-

That’s quite the drop on Ambrose vs. Ziggler and Lesnar vs. Orton. Some of them are spot on though and that’s not the biggest surprise.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/08/21/summerslam-2016-they-didnt/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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