New Column: Insert Your Own Witty Slammy Line Here

Simple one here as I pick my own Slammy winners.

 

http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-insert-witty-slammy-line/32663/




Monday Night Raw – December 8, 2014: Worst In Awards Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 8, 2014
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Arena, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s the Slammys! These shows used to be a highlight of the year but now they’re just there as a background for a usually boring show. However, there’s usually a good ending to these shows but with tonight being the go home show for Sunday’s TLC show, it’s hard to say how big of a surprise we’re going to get. Let’s get to it.

We start with a Tonight On Raw preview, focusing on Cena vs. Big Show in the main event.

Jerry Lawler brings out Seth Green to host the show. Seth says this is our awards show and you can vote for the winners of the awards on the WWE App. Miz and Mizdow cut him off though (minus the belts). The amusing thing here is that Green is 5’4 so they TOWER over him. Miz gives a pitch about being the A-lister Seth needs, but Green says Mizdow is the real A-lister. Mizdow smiles but Miz cuts him off, only to have Damien do a “call me” sign behind Miz’s back. Anyway they’re here for the THIS IS AWESOME Award. The nominees:

Occupy Raw

Stephanie McMahon getting arrested for slapping Brie

The Authority being eliminated/Sting debuting

Steve Austin, The Rock and Hulk Hogan opening Wrestlemania

We’ll get the winner after the first match.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins

Ziggler backdrops him to the floor and we take a break thirty seconds in. Back with Rollins in control and driving a knee into Dolph’s ribs. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Dolph sends him face first into the buckle to get a breather. The Stinger Splash and elbow drop get two but Seth blocks the running DDT. Ziggler counters the buckle bomb into a sunset flip and now the running DDT is good for two. Back up and they head to the corner with Ziggler shrugging Dolph down, only to have the Stooges shove him off, setting up the Curb Stomp for the pin at 7:20.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do anything but at least Ziggler didn’t lose clean. I can live with a heel cheating to win and beating a hot star, evne though he’s going into an Intercontinental Title shot this coming Sunday. Why would we need to keep Ziggler strong for something like that?

Sting debuting wins the THIS IS AWESOME Award. Of course Sting isn’t here so Seth is going to accept on his behalf, but Seth comes up and takes the trophy because Sting is responsible for the Authority being gone and Seth deserves it.

Here are some Slammys awarded on the pre-show:

Insult of the Year – Rock insulting Lana and Rusev

Tag Team of the Year – Usos

Breakout Star of the Year – Dean Ambrose

Hashtag of the Year – RKOOUTTANOWHERE

Fan Participation – YOU SOLD OUT to Seth Rollins

Kofi Kingston vs. Stardust

Stardust takes Kofi down to start and steps on his chest before the referee breaks it up in the ropes. A chinlock goes as far as you would expect it to and Kofi fights up with a hurricanrana. Some dropkicks put Starudust down and the NEW DAY Drop (no more Boom) sets up a running knee in the corner. A high cross body is enough to pin Stardust at 2:58.

Johnny Ace is presenting Surprise Return of the Year. After suggesting the People Power replace the Authority, here are the nominees:

Hulk Hogan

Batista

The Rock

Ultimate Warrior

Winner announced after How To Download The App and a break. After we’re back, Ultimate Warrior wins.

Rollins is in the back with the Stooges when the run into Paul Heyman. Seth sends the Stooges away so he can talk to Heyman about the tables match. He thinks he might be next in line to face the Beast after he beats Cena, but promises that his cash-in will come when Lesnar and Heyman least expect it. Heyman is fine with that, but his client might as well be champion for life. However, that doesn’t stop Rollins from being the future. John Cena is standing in his way, so if Rollins wants to be the future, he needs to make sure that Cena is stuck in the past. Rollins seems to like the idea.

Video on NXT Women’s Champion Charlotte.

Charlotte vs. Natalya

Non-title of course. We get a WOO to start and Charlotte drives knees into the ribs to start. She stomps Natalya down against the ropes but gets caught in a quick choke to slow her down. That’s fine with Charlotte who just pounds away at her face. A slap makes Charlotte even madder but Natalya takes out the legs as they hit the mat. Charlotte drops her again with a wicked chop and drops a hard knee for two. Natalya tries the Sharpshooter but gets countered into the Figure Four, which is countered into a small package to give Natalya the pin at 2:30.

Tyson Kidd takes the spotlight like he did at Survivor Series.

Santino presents the OMG Shocking Moment of the Year. He says he was shocked just now by seeing Luke Harper take a shower. Usually he’s watching the Divas take showers….but he’s not a creep. The nominees are:

Seth Sells Out

Nikki Turns On Brie

Bray Wyatt’s Children’s Choir

The Streak Is Conquered

The winner is of course the Streak being conquered. Lesnar’s music plays but we get Heyman instead for a very brief acceptance speech without saying anything of note.

Here’s Bray Wyatt to talk about seeing her for the first time in that rocking chair beneath the Cypress tree. We see Dean destroying the chair last week and Bray says Dean destroyed something that can’t be replaced. That leads us to Dean having his throat crushed on Smackdown in retaliation. Bray asks if that shocks or frightens us. No one here knows what they’re dealing with and he despises all of us.

If you get too close to him, you will get burned by his fire as he stands on top of that ladder. Bray won’t allow us to cry for him though as Dean deserves what’s coming. He repeats Tables Ladders and Chairs over and over again until an ambulance drives into the arena. Dean pops out in a neck brace and pulls a table out of the ambulance. He throws it on the ramp before pulling out a ladder and chair to go with it.

There goes the neck brace and Dean drags the ladder and chair to the ring. He throws the chair in and nails Bray in the ribs with the ladder. Dean throws in a chair and hits Bray square in the head with it. A table comes in as well but Wyatt rolls to the floor. Dean lays on the table with the chair over him. Bray comes back down and gets another chair thrown at him. This Sunday, Dean is going to become the monster and eat Bray alive.

Seth Green brings out Jerry Lawler to present Diva of the Year. The nominees are:

Brie Bella

Nikki Bella

AJ Lee

Paige

The girls are shown in the back when Titus O’Neil shows up in a tuxedo for some reason. AJ wins and nothing seems to come of the cameo. She says that she promised to redefine the term Diva three years ago. Next year she hopes that next year, it’s Bayley, Sasha Banks, Charlotte, Emma or Paige is up here on the throne. She’s not done being queen though and will get her title back this week.

Cena talks about Vince telling Austin that the locker room needs to step up. That might fire up Seth Rollins, so maybe Rollins wants Big Show to wear him out tonight. This Sunday, Rollins has to put him through a table, which is good for Seth because he can’t pin Cena or make him tap out. If Cena can’t win this Sunday, maybe it’s time for him to step down so Seth can step up. Tonight he’s going to slam a giant and shake South Carolina because his time isn’t up yet. This Sunday, Rollins goes through a table.

Erick Rowan vs. Luke Harper

Non-title and Harper brings a ladder with him. It’s a slugout to start with Rowan getting the better of it and nailing a running splash in the corner. That’s fine with Harper who nails a dropkick for one before kicking Erick in the head. The Gator Roll doesn’t get Luke anywhere as Rowan pops back up and nails some clotheslines. A full nelson slam gets two on Harper and they head outside with Luke hitting Rowan with the ladder for the DQ at 2:05.

Post match Rowan fights back and starts throwing the stairs into the ring. Harper takes a big shot to the head and bails.

The Usos come up to Naomi to celebrate their Slammys. Jimmy says it’s the second best thing to happen to him all year after marrying her. Naomi has been talking to Miz’s agent and apparently it went well. Uso isn’t sure but Naomi has a screen test later this week. That’s fine with Jimmy but he’s going to Hollywood with her because Miz is involved in this somehow. Naomi interprets this as Jimmy not trusting her.

Adam Rose comes out to present LOL Moment of the Year. The Bunny won Animal of the Year earlier. Rose thinks he should be hosting and says the fans know nothing when they disagree. The nominees are:

Mr. T.’s Mother’s Day message at the Hall of Fame ceremony

WeeLC

Mizdow the Stunt Double

Vickie Guerrero knocking Stephanie into pudding

The Bunny tries to open the envelope but Rose gives us Mizdow for the win. Here he is along with Miz (and the belts this time), who actually lets Mizdow have some spotlight for a bit. It’s only for a bit though as Miz takes the trophy and says he can make us go through all these emotions because he’s an actor. Miz: “I hear you. You want MIZ NOW and you’re getting MIZ NOW!” Miz thanks the only one that has been there for him since day one: the moneymaker. Mizdow doesn’t seem that offended.

Here are some other winners.

Faction of the Year – Shield

Rivalry of the Year – Bryan vs. Authority

Raw Guest Star of the Year – Jackman

Twitter Handle of the Year – @HeelZiggler

Couple of the Year – Bryan/Brie Bella

Here are Lana and Rusev for a chat. Lana runs down the American economy and President Obama before moving on to the Real Americans. Lana: “That is an LOL moment!” Cue Swagger, who will be challenging Rusev for the title on Sunday, to say that Rusev broke Colter’s leg, so he’s going to snap Rusev’s ankle. Jack charges and ducks the running superkick before dropping the ankle on the barricade. There’s the Patriot Lock on the floor and Rusev kind of taps until referees make the save.

New Day vs. Goldust/Stardust on Sunday’s pre-show.

Usos/Ryback vs. Kane/Miz/Damien Mizdow

Seth Green is on commentary. Kane slams Ryback to start as Seth talks about Battlestar Galactica. The Usos come in to start in on the arm but the announcers are too busy taking pictures. Off to Miz to stomp away on Jey before a headlock takes the actor down. Lawler has to get the announcers back on the match as Cole does his traditional driving off a cliff of a tangent. Jey hammers away on Miz and grabs a suplex, so Mizdow comes in and mimes getting hit in the face before raising his arm like he’s about to be suplexed. He flips over then dives over the top after Miz is sent flying.

Back from a break with Kane holding Jey in a chinlock before it’s off to Miz for a Reality Check. Jey finally breaks free and tags in Ryback to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Usos escape a double chokeslam and nail Kane with a double superkick. Jey dives onto Kane but Jimmy gets low bridged to the floor when charging at Miz. The Meathook and Shell Shock end Miz at 9:52.

Rating: C. This was a quick match that combined the two feuds into one and there’s nothing wrong with that. Jimmy vs. Miz is at least a fresh story and something that fits the characters instead of being shoehorned in. Ryback continues to get a push, even though he’s lost some momentum after that performance at Survivor Series.

Green celebrates with the winners.

We look back at the first Slammys in 1986.

Here’s Ricky Steamboat to present Match of the Year. He gives a very nice speech about what it means to have a classic match to introduce the nominees.

Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton vs. Batista – Wrestlemania XXX

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt – Payback

Shield vs. Evolution – Extreme Rules

Team Cena vs. Team Authority – Survivor Series

Team Cena vs. Team Authority wins with Ziggler coming out to accept. Ziggler sounds very touched by this and says they’re going to build off of it because this belongs to all of the fans.

AJ Lee vs. Summer Rae

Summer mocks AJ for winning the award earlier and AJ goes right at her, only to eat a wheelbarrow slam for two. A spinwheel kick that misses by six inches gets two on AJ before we hit a quickly broken chinlock. AJ pops up and Black Widows Summer for the submission at 2:18.

Rob Van Dam is here to present the Extreme Moment of the Year. The nominees are:

Brock Lesnar’s 16 suplexes to John Cena

Kane tombstoning Bryan on the steps and the announcers’ table

Chris Jericho diving off the cage and onto Bray Wyatt

Seth Rollins Curb Stomps Dean Ambrose onto cinder blocks

Jericho wins and Fandango comes out to accept on his behalf. You’ll never forget his name you see.

Saint Mick does his merchandise shilling.

Big Show says no one is going to forgive him for what he does so he’s going to destroy Cena tonight.

Booker T. is presenting Superstar of the Year.

Dean Ambrose

Bray Wyatt

Roman Reigns

Brock Lesnar

Bray Wyatt

John Cena

Seth Rollins

After a break, the winner is Roman Reigns. He’s actually in the building tonight to accept the award and says this may not be the brass ring but it’s a step in the right direction. It doesn’t matter if you’re at the top of the stairs, he’s stepping up and you can believe that.

Chris Jericho is Guest GM next week.

John Cena vs. Big Show

Big Show’s music comes on at 11:00pm EST so this is going to be quick. Cena charges right at him and gets headbutted down. A shoulder bounces off Show and he chokes Cena on the ropes. Cena avoids a charge in the corner and grabs a DDT, only to walk into a side slam to put him right back down. Off to a bearhug for a bit before Cena jumps onto the giant’s back for a sleeper. Show flips him forward but misses the KO Punch, allowing Cena to hit a belly to back. The Shuffle is countered by a chokeslam but Cena slips out and AA’s Show for two as Rollins and the Stooges come in for the DQ at 5:43.

Rating: D. This was every Cena vs. Big Show match you’ve ever seen and with the ending that everyone and their mother (even Mr. T.’s) knew was coming. It’s not the worst match in the world, but what could they possibly do in less than six minutes with a completely telegraphed ending?

Rollins loads up a ladder for a super Curb Stomp but Ziggler makes the save. Cena and Ziggler beat up the Stooges but Big Show knocks them both out. Cue Rowan but Harper jumps him from behind. Show chokeslams him onto the steps so here’s Ryback for the late save. He posts Show and Meathooks Harper before setting up a table. The Shell Shock is broken up by Kane with a chair but Ziggler takes out Kane. Some superkicks drop Big Show, only to have Harper put Dolph through a table. Cena AA’s Harper, only to eat a Curb Stomp. Rollins loads up the announcers’ table and TripleBombs Cena through to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Well that happened. This was one of those shows where there just wasn’t anything to talk about. The Ambrose vs. Wyatt segment was good but it’s not enough to carry a three hour show. This was much more a go home show with a few other things going on in the background. Sunday should be fun but we really need to get to Wrestlemania season to breathe some life into this company again. The show wasn’t even horrible but there’s just nothing here worth seeing.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – Curb Stomp

Kofi Kingston b. Stardust – High cross body

Natalya b. Charlotte – Small package

Erick Rowan b. Luke Harper via DQ when Harper hit Rowan with a ladder

Usos/Ryback b. Miz/Damien Mizdow/Kane – Shell Shock to Miz

AJ Lee b. Summer Rae – Black Widow

John Cena b. Big Show via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: December 4, 2014

This is an interesting time for WWE as we just got done with a dull week after dropping off a high peak. However, with a show like TLC coming up, there’s only so much work that needs to be done. You can just split up Team Cena vs. the Authority and make a bunch of gimmick matches out of them, which works well enough due to the show being naturally fun. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the Anonymous Raw GM computer talking, only to be cut off by Cena, who didn’t want to rehash this stupid gimmick. Thankfully that more or less was the end of the computer for most of the night because it really doesn’t need to be around. However, the computer did create a major match at TLC: Cena vs. Rollins in a tables match, where Cena can lose his #1 contendership. Rollins has nothing to gain but pride, but that might change as we go along.

The rest of the segment was filled out, because Heaven forbid the opening segment isn’t twenty minutes long, with a huge brawl involving pretty much everyone from the elimination tag, eventually setting up a six man tag for the main event. Again, this could have been cut down by ten minutes but that’s the rule of thumb anymore. The good guys got the worst of it with Cena going through a table.

The Usos won a long Tag Team Turmoil match to earn a shot at the Tag Team Titles. As usual I’m not a fan of these matches as a lot of the falls end way too soon, which makes you wonder why the regular matches don’t end that fast. The important thing here though was the post match scene, as Miz offered Jimmy Uso’s wife Naomi a producer’s card, likely trying to get into her husband’s head. This led to Jimmy coming out and knocking the heck out of Miz later on. I love these little angles that enhance what would be an otherwise run of the mill match. Do more things like this.

In another important moment, Erick Rowan is revealed as a genius guitar playing wine enthusiast. I did a full column on this last night so I’ll keep it short here: adding little characteristics and details to people make them far more interesting than they are in the ring. Give me something that makes me want to see more, because the same matches aren’t going to keep my interest up.

Rowan beat Big Show via DQ when Show hit him with the steps. Those have been a recurring theme between the two of them so odds are we’re seeing something stupid like a steps match at the PPV.

Rusev attacked Zeb Colter off screen and cost us Fandango vs. Swagger. Jack came out a segment later to chase Rusev off and reignite their feud.

Mizdow beat Fernando in a dull match that took place so Jimmy could come out and slap Miz.

Bray Wyatt beat R-Truth for the millionth time before calling out Ambrose again. The key thing here was Dean breaking Bray’s chair, which gave us some of the first real emotions from Wyatt. He looked human for the first time and it opens up some interesting doors for the feud.

Naomi was AJ’s fan chosen partner to beat the Bellas in another lame match. Naturally AJ made Nikki tap because what else would happen?

Paul Heyman put Lesnar’s appearances over as the most important thing you’ll see all year, even though it doesn’t look like Brock is going to be there until after TLC. He also asked who becomes #1 contender after Cena loses at TLC, because Lesnar is going to smash whomever he faces.

The main event was Ryback/Cena/Ziggler vs. Kane/Harper/Rollins with Ziggler sunset flipping Harper for the pin. Big Show came in post match and got beaten up to end the show. This was a very long match at over 25 minutes, but unfortunately it felt more long than good with a ton of chinlocks. Ryback and Ziggler got to look good though as Cena continues to be just kind of in the background like he has been since Survivor Series. It’s kind of interesting for a change, but I could go for more of him talking at least.

Overall the show was more interesting than last week, but they’re going to have to give us something interesting at the Slammys next week. TLC is going to be fun because of how insane things can be with all the gimmicks, but they better be thankful that they only have three weeks to fill because these shows are really getting dull. Granted it probably has something to do with us seeing these exact same things on the way to Survivor Series, but when has that ever stopped the writing staff before?

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Monday Night Raw – December 1, 2014: It’s A Long Way To The Top If You Want To Build A Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 1, 2014
Location: BOK Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

The theme for tonight’s show is Cyber Monday with guest host the Anonymous Raw GM as represented by the computer. The question now is whether this is permanent or if there’s going to be a guest GM every week. Hopefully it’s the latter, though I could see the Authority eventually being revealed as the new computer GM. Let’s get to it.

We open with….the Authority! Well it’s a recap about last week but it’s still the first thing we see.

Cole opens us up with the computer but here’s Cena to interrupt things. He starts running down the computer, saying he’s just like Brock Lesnar who shows up once a year. Lesnar isn’t here tonight but neither is the Authority because Team Cena won. He’s about to tell us why his team fought harder when we have another e-mail. Cena stares Cole down and goes to the podium himself. He isn’t going to let this happen and closes the computer, but here are Rollins and the Stooges to interrupt.

The two of them share some banter until Rollins says Cena is taking undue credit for the win at Survivor Series. Rollins remembers eliminating Cena at Survivor Series and only losing due to Sting. On the other hand, Cena remembers one man left on Team Cena eliminating three members of Team Authority, including Rollins himself. Seth: “You say Dolph, I say Sting. Whatever.”

Seth wants to know who’s next to take over Raw. Is it going to be JBL? Cena hands JBL his hat but Rollins thinks it might be Batista, drawing more heat than Rollins has drawn all night. Maybe they could give Eric Bischoff a call? The point is there’s going to be a different GM every week and the show is going to fall into chaos until Cena brings back the Authority.

Cena gets in the ring and rips on Rollins for being a normal guy in a lot of latex with two wannabe mall cops in his corner. He tells Seth to ask him to bring the Authority back nicely, including making Rollins get down on a knee. The e-mail goes off and we have a tables match set up between these two for TLC with Cena’s #1 contendership at stake. Not that Rollins can win it mind you.

The brawl is on, including with Kane coming in for a chokeslam to Cena. Seth loads up a table but Ryback comes in for the save. Kane beats him down with a chair so Rowan comes in and kicks Kane down, only to have Big Show come in with a splash. Show loads up the steps so Ziggler comes out to post him and get a ladder, but Harper runs out and drives the ladder into Dolph. Cena loads Rollins up for an AA through the table but eats the KO Punch, setting up a TripleBomb through the table with Rollins playing Reigns.

Back with Cena and company slowly being helped out. A six man tag is announced for later.

Tag Team Turmoil

Winners get a Tag Team Title match at TLC. We start with Kofi/Big E. vs. Goldust/Stardust as Kofi throws Stardust around with ease. Big E. runs Stardust down and the Big Ending/Top rope DDT (the Midnight Hour) ends Stardust at 1:36. Tyson Kidd and Cesaro are the next team as we take a break. Back with Cesaro throwing Kofi around before bringing in Kidd for some choking on the ropes.

Off to a chinlock on Kofi for a bit before he elbows up, only to be slammed back down. Kingston rolls away and tags Big E. back in to clean house, only to have Cesaro break up the Big Ending. Kidd joins him and Big E. clotheslines both guys to the floor. Kofi gets launched over the topr for a big dive, setting up a springboard shot to the face. The Dusts come out for a distraction though, allowing Kidd to roll Kofi up for the pin at 8:11 total.

The Usos are in third (of five teams) but Jimmy walks into a suplex from Cesaro. There’s almost no effect though as Jimmy comes back with the Umaga Attack in the corner before it’s off to Jey to work on the arm. Kidd comes back in for a kick to the face but Cesaro makes a blind tag, setting up a release German suplex to drop Jey as we take another break.

Back with Jimmy fighting out of another chinlock. Jimmy fights up but has to suplex Kidd down. Tyson jumps into a superkick, setting up the tag to Jey for the Superfly Splash to get us down to one on one at 16:00. Finally we have Adam Rose/the Bunny vs. the Usos for the title shot. Rose starts fast with a pair of rollups on Jimmy but the Bunny tags himself in. Adam starts arguing as the Bunny goes up. Jimmy tries a superplex but gets caught in a sunset bomb for two. More arguing allows Jey to superkick Rose, setting up the Superfly Splash for the title shot at 19:10.

Rating: C. These matches always have the same complaint; why do they never win matches as fast as they do here? At least the middle part was long to prevent this from falling into the same pattern, but it says a lot that we only have five teams and two of them were thrown together.

Naomi is watching her husband (one of the Usos) in the back when Miz/Mizdow come in to say they’ll keep the titles. Miz actually offers her a spot in a movie and gives her a card. Mizdow gives her an invisible card as Naomi rolls her eyes.

A long black limo brings Vince to the arena.

Seth Green is hosting next week.

Rowan fixes his Rubik’s Cube and reiterates that Show is a bully.

Erick Rowan vs. Big Show

Show says he doesn’t like being called a bully. Cole says Rowan has a genius IQ. Erick quickly knocks him to the floor but Show comes back in and drops Rowan with ease. He rips at Rowan’s face and puts on a chinlock to kill some time. Rowan fights up and heads outside, only to have Show nail him with the steps for the DQ at 4:22.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here though the idea of Rowan being a genius is kind of interesting. There’s some potential for some interesting bits there, though I’m not sure I have any confidence in WWE to pull it off. This is likely setting up a big match between the two at TLC, which should be interesting.

Vince is excited to be on Austin’s podcast. He won’t bring back the Authority though.

We recap the Bellas cheating to beat AJ last week. You can pick AJ’s partner for a tag match later.

Fandango vs. Jack Swagger

And there’s no Swagger. We cut to the back where Colter is down with a leg injury. Fandango wins via forfeit.

Here are Rusev and Lana to complain about the Pledge of Allegiance last week and brag about Rusev winning the battle royal on Friday. Rusev implies that he hurt Colter as the Russian flag comes down for Lana’s pledge. Swagger charges out for the brawl but referees hold him back.

Damien Mizdow vs. Fernando

This is due to Torito stealing one of Mizdow’s fake Tag Team Title belts. Feeling out process to start with Fernando easily taking him down and grabbing an armbar. Back up and Mizdow grabs a quick backdrop and hooks the Figure Four for the submission at 2:25.

Jimmy Uso, Naomi’s real life husband, comes out and slaps Miz in the face, saying stay away from her.

Bray Wyatt vs. R-Truth

Bray throws him around with ease to start and shouts for Ambrose. Truth fights out of a cravate and avoids the running backsplash. That just makes Bray mad but he takes a running kick to the face. The Lie Detector puts Bray down but he avoids the ax kick and plants Truth with the release Rock Bottom. A modified DDT onto the apron knocks Truth silly and it’s the Spider Walk into Sister Abigail for the pin at 4:22.

Rating: D+. Total squash here with Bray looking great most of the time. He’s getting better at making his offense look more devastating, which is the kind of thing you need from a monster like him. I’m not sure where he goes at TLC, but that match could be one heck of a war.

Post match Bray starts throwing in chairs, still shouting for Dean. He wants the truth but pulls out a ladder as we take a break. We come back with Bray sitting in his rocking chair under a ladder with a table in the corner. Bray tells us the story of Jacob and his great ladder that the angels climbed up to Heaven and back. Wyatt dreams of a ladder where he ascends the ladder to praise no one. He looks down at his world and laughs at all the creatures that God has created and thinks they look like insects. In his dreams, he sees tables, ladders and chairs.

Cue Dean for a brawl and to put Bray on the table, only to have Wyatt escape as Dean climbs the ladder. Bray runs away as referees stop dean. Ambrose goes back inside where there are about ten chairs, two tables and a ladder. He shoves the ladder over and looks at Bray’s rocking chair, eventually tossing it down and destroying it, infuriating Wyatt.

We recap the end of the opening segment with Cena going through the table after everyone came out.

Bella Twins vs. AJ Lee/???

Here are the poll results for AJ’s partner:

Natalya – 32%

Naomi – 48%

Alicia Fox – 20%

Bella Twins vs. AJ Lee/Naomi

Brie jumps Naomi before the bell, allowing Nikki to get two off a suplex. The Bellas take turns nailing Naomi in the face before Nikki hooks a chinlock. Naomi fights up and tags in AJ to clean house, including a tornado DDT to Nikki. Everything breaks down and it’s AJ vs. Nikki with a Shining Wizard staggering the champ. The Black Widow makes Nikki tap at 3:25.

Rating: D+. Well that happened. As is the usual case with most Divas matches, there’s almost nothing to see here and it sets up AJ vs. Nikki again. I’m sure Brie will get involved and AJ will need to find a friend to help her. Perhaps say, Paige? Either that or Charlotte comes in and takes the title. Neither does much for me but that’s likely due to the Bellas trying to be all serious and important.

Mick Foley, in one of the best Santa Claus outfits I’ve ever seen, hypes up the big sale on WWEshop.com. I really wouldn’t have recognized him if not for his voice and the cheap pop.

Paul Heyman is here via satellite to address the stipulation for Cena vs. Rollins. First up though, he wants to address what Cena said about Lesnar being here once a year. Would you have Christmas once a year? Of course not, because it would ruin the moment. Why not just have Wrestlemania every Monday night? Now if Cena comes out of TLC still #1 contender, he has to face a fresh Brock Lesnar.

However, what if he doesn’t? Who becomes #1 contender? Would it be Rollins, who Curb Stomped Brock Lesnar but now can’t hide behind the Authority? Maybe the Undertaker? That could be interesting, if you could find him. What about Sting? You wouldn’t even have to advertise it as a retirement match, because Sting would retire after Lesnar got his hands on him. Let’s just throw the entire WWE roster against Lesnar like throwing humans to the lions in the Roman Coliseum. Heyman says Brock Lesnar is the new authority in WWE because he’s the can’t miss, must see, undisputed WWE World Heavyweight Champion.

Ryback/John Cena/Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper/Seth Rollins/Kane

They have a lot of time for this. Cena wants Rollins to start with him but gets Harper instead. That’s fine with John who knocks Harper down and pulls in Rollins for the STF. Luke makes an early save, only to walk into a belly to belly for two. Off to Ziggler for a double dropkick for two before it’s off to Ryback vs. Kane for the big power showdown. Ryback takes over with the Thesz press and Warrior Splash.

Back to Harper to hammer away in the corner until Ryback scores with the Meat Hook. Rolins comes in and gets in some shots of his own before handing it back to Luke. Ryback fights him over a suplex before picking Luke up for a very delayed suplex as we go to a break. Back with Ryback dropping Harper with the suplex. If that was continuous (it wasn’t), give Ryback the title like, now.

Off to Ziggler vs. Kane with Dolph grabbing a sleeper until Kane drives him into the corner. Kane knocks him out of the air for two and the heels take over again. Luke Gator Rolls him and we’re in the chinlock. Kane comes in for a chinlock of his own before Rollins whips Ziggler hard into the corner. Back up and Seth misses a charge in the corner, setting up the hot tag to Cena. House is quickly cleaned with Lawler suddenly being a huge Cena cheerleader. Cena cleans house and double suplexes Kane with some help from Ryback. Mercury and Noble knock knock Cena silly as we take a break.

Back again with Cena fighting out of a Harper chinlock but eating a superkick from Harper for two. Rollins comes back in for a chinlock of his own but Cena suplexes him down to escape. The hot tag brings in Ziggler to face Harper with a neckbreaker and Fameasser getting two. Everything breaks down with Cena diving onto all five guys at once. Kane escapes the AA and kicks Cena down, only to take a powerslam from Ryback. Everyone hits their secondary finishers until Ziggler counters a Harper powerbomb into a sunset flip for the pin at 25:17.

Rating: C+. This was much more of a long match than a good one with FAR too many chinlocks than were necessary. Ziggler continuing to get a push is a good thing but there needed to be more stuff here than what we were given. Ryback continues to just kind of be there, which isn’t what you want him to be doing at this point.

Post match Big Show comes in to clean house but Rowan comes out with the steps to destroy everyone. Cole seems to have officially dubbed Rowan Big Red. Show grabs Ryback and Rowan for a double chokeslam but is nice enough to stick his chin out for a superkick from Ziggler. Cena AA’s Show for Survivor Series, allowing Rowan to crush him with the steps to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a bit more entertaining than last week but it still didn’t do much for me. They’ve got most of the card set for TLC and hopefully it’s Ambrose vs. Wyatt again in the main event. If nothing else it fits the name of the show and gives you a potential huge crash for the ending. This wasn’t a great show or even very good, but it advanced some stories and got me more interested in the PPV, which is somehow less than two weeks away.

Results

Usos won tag team turmoil last eliminating Adam Rose/the Bunny – Superfly Splash to Rose

Erick Rowan b. Big Show via DQ when Show used the steps

Fandango b. Jack Swagger via forfeit

Damien Mizdow b. Fernando – Figure Four

Bray Wyatt b. R-Truth – Sister Abigail

AJ Lee/Naomi b. Bella Twins – Black Widow to Nikki

Dolph Ziggler/John Cena/Ryback b. Kane/Luke Harper/Seth Rollins – Sunset flip to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: November 24, 2014

Sting! The Stinger! The Man Called Sting! These are just a few of the nicknames of someone you won’t be seeing on Raw this week. He debuted at Survivor Series to help end the Authority as he pulled Ziggler’s body onto Rollins, who hadn’t moved in about eight minutes and clearly needed to be resuscitated. Other than that….yeah there isn’t much as Survivor Series was a one note show. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the Authority because WWE likes to troll us. They were all sad about being thrown out of course but said we’d miss them later on. HHH babbled about business and how WWE will need them back in the future. For some reason he went into a nearly word for word speech from the end of A Few Good Men about how WWE needed them. If nothing else that’s an awesome movie so I can’t complain much there.

Daniel Bryan of all people cut them off to do the YES post in front of them. After a break, Bryan announced that he was in charge for the night. First up he brought out all five members of Team Authority from the night before to give them their assignments for the night. These segments took nearly half an hour in total, but Bryan’s energy made them easier to sit through. I’ll cover each member as their antics come up, starting with Henry getting beaten by Ryback in about a minute.

The Authority left with Vince while Stephanie begged Vince’s forgiveness. The boss didn’t seem to care and said the only thing he’s sorry for is having to sit through Thanksgiving with these losers.

Next up was Luke Harper beating Ambrose via DQ when Harper shoved Dean into the referee. This wasn’t a great match as you knew the ending was going to be screwy, but at least they didn’t go with the obvious Bray interference. That would come after, as Bray jumped Dean on the floor and buried him under a bunch of chairs next to the announcers’ table.

Santino Marella and Larry the Cable Guy showed up and weren’t funny.

Miz/Mizdow beat Goldust/Stardust to retain the titles. The idea here was Miz stayed on the floor with an alleged injury for most of the match before coming in to hit a quick Skull Crushing Finale and steal the glory.

Kane is in charge of concessions tonight. This led to some unfunny bits of pouring mustard on Santino and getting in a fight with Ryback, likely setting up a match at TLC.

Lane and Rusev had to either say the Pledge of Allegiance to the American flag or have Rusev defend the title in a battle royal. Lana started to but Rusev stopped her, drawing out Sgt. Slaughter for a showdown. Naturally this went nowhere and Jack Swagger came out for the save. I really hope they’re not going back to this feud because it’s been done to death already.

Fandango beat Justin Gabriel in a copy of the Survivor Series pre-show match. Nothing to see here.

Big Show came out for his big speech and admits that it might have been a mistake, but thinks he’s earned the benefit of the doubt after all his years in the company. We got the usual “I have bills to pay” speech, which I’d have more sympathy for if he hadn’t used his one wish on a title shot last year. Eventually Rowan came down and called Show a bully before knocking him out of the ring with ease.

Brie Bella beat AJ via rollup when Nikki interfered. No sign of the Bellas splitting when the servant period was over.

Adam Rose and the Bunny lost to Kidd and Natalya in the same match they’ve been having for weeks.

Ziggler and Cena beat Rollins and the Stooges in the exact match you would expect them to have. The big deals here were that the Stooges could be selected by the fans via the App and the Anonymous Raw GM returned to end the show. In theory this is going to be a weekly deal.

Overall this show was about setting up the new world of Monday Night Raw after the Authority is gone. The show really wasn’t all that good, but at least they set up something for the future. They only have a few weeks until TLC, but they already have the fallout from Survivor Series as a foundation for the matches there. It’s not a good show but they had to take a breather after all the stuff they did last night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/




Reviewing the Review: Survivor Series 2014

This was a show where I’ve needed some time to digest everything that I saw. Now everyone knew that this was a one match show coming in, but I don’t think people were expecting to see something like this. Obviously the big moment is coming at the end but there was some other interesting stuff before then. Let’s get to it.

I’m going to gloss over the pre-show matches as there’s just nothing to talk about. Fandango is somehow even less interesting than he was before and Swagger vs. Cesaro has been done to death. Neither match was any good, but they REALLY don’t need to have an hour long pre-show. That makes a show four hours, meaning the three hour Raw is now the short show. Let that sink in for a minute.

The show itself opened with the first of our filler segments. Vince, Cena and the Authority came out to reiterate the stipulations of the main event, with the added caveat that only Cena could bring the Authority back in the future. Not only did this not segment need to happen to start a pay per view, but it didn’t need to happen at all. This could have been announced later and another match could have been added in to fill some of the time. But instead we needed a fifteen minute speech because we hadn’t heard HHH and Stephanie talk enough.

The opening match was the four way tag for the titles, with the Dusts dropping the belts down to Miz/Mizdow. This whole thing was a way to get somewhere with Mizdow’s popularity, which is the only way they can go. It was a watchable match but at the same time there was too much going on to have it be anything good.

Los Matadores and the Usos were just kind of there to fill in spots and make sure we didn’t have heel vs. heel. Again the match felt like they were filling time at points, because there are only five matches on the card and what else are they supposed to do? Miz celebrating with both belts was a nice touch as you would expect.

Adam Rose and the Bunny played with toys when Slater Gator came in to set up a match later. This would be more filler.

One group of bad Divas plus Natalya beat another group of bad Divas plus Paige. This match was an absolute disaster with the moves being botches, almost no flow to the match, and everyone being all over the place. The idea was supposed to be Paige vs. the World, but she would have been better off without her partners anyway.

Ambrose and Wyatt had a good but not great brawl to set up the next match at TLC. Thankfully they announced that in advance as it would have felt like a waste of time given how obvious they were with where it’s going. The match itself wasn’t great but it was a nice shot in the arm after an hour of uninteresting stuff. The worst part of this whole thing though: Ambrose doing the Wyatt spider pose and Cole shouting “THAT’S WHAT BRAY WYATT DOES!”

I can’t stand this talking down to the audience and acting like they can’t remember anything longer than eight seconds ago. Yeah some of the fans are watching for the first time, but just let them think that Dean is being insane instead of treating the fans who have watched for more than a day like imbeciles. In other words, makes Michael Cole SHUT UP FOR ONCE!

The comedy tag match was nothing you wouldn’t see on Smackdown. The Bunny continues to get on Rose’s nerves but they need to get somewhere with it already as this isn’t getting anyone anywhere.

Roman Reigns did a nice satellite interview, saying everything he’s said in the previous ones. Apparently he’s been taking acting lessons recently and they actually seem to be paying off. He felt a lot more natural here instead of reading off a script (which he likely was).

Nikki Bella won the Divas Title from AJ in a match designed off Sheamus vs. Bryan at Wrestlemania XXVIII, complete with the kiss to AJ. In theory the Bellas are back together, making the last few months of driving me crazy TOTALLY POINTLESS. Nikki did look good though.

The main event was a nice long match which lived up to expectations, complete with a bunch of surprises. Big Show knocked Henry out in about fifteen seconds and we had the best part of the match: HHH’s emotional roller coaster. Yeah I get annoyed when he takes the better part of forever to get anywhere with his promos, but when he calms down and lets his body language do the talking, he’s incredible effective.

The match slowed down for a bit until everything broke down and a Curb Stomp into a spinwheel kick from Rusev was enough to pin Ryback. Yeah after the last few weeks of it being all about Ryback, he was out via pin in about eight minutes. That more or less ends the return push that he had going on as Ryback continues to lose the big matches. It crippled Lex Luger’s career and it’s gotten Ryback as well. Granted not being very good in the ring has hurt him too.

It slowed again with Big Show taking a long beating from everyone. Then for a change of pace, Ziggler took a long beating from everyone. It all broke down again with Rusev throwing Ziggler around on the floor, only to miss a splash through the table, resulting in a countout. They had to get rid of him somehow so it was this or a DQ. Twelve minutes passed between Ryback and Rusev’s eliminations to give you an idea of how much things slowed down. The next one was a bit faster as Rollins Curb Stomped Rowan, setting up the discus lariat from Harper for a pin just a few minutes later.

Then things got interesting as Big Show knocked Cena out, turning heel for probably the fifteenth time in his WWE career. Rollins got an easy pin and Big Show walked out, making it 3-1 with Ziggler facing Kane, Harper and Rollins. This was VERY interesting as it put the focus on Dolph instead of Cena, which is exactly what this match should have been about: making someone else into a star. Cena doesn’t need a win like this, so let someone else get a big rub.

Ziggler was basically dead at this point but kept fighting, which was exactly the story they had been setting up for the last several weeks. He took out Kane with a superkick and Zig Zag before taking one heck of a beating from Harper. Luke got frustrated when he couldn’t pin him though and Ziggler grabbed a rollup and some jeans for the pin.

This sequence was right out of the Shawn Michaels playbook and that’s as good as you can get. The key thing to Ziggler’s offense is that it can come from out of nowhere and it’s not a huge stretch for him to do this. The superkick, Zig Zag and rollup are things that you can do out of nowhere and again it played to the Ziggler Will Not Quit idea. That was just a warmup for the good stuff though.

Rollins and Ziggler had an awesome six or seven minute sequence of near falls and missed finishers, including Rollins nearly hitting a top rope Curb Stomp. Ziggler finally took over and hit a Zig Zag but the Stooges came in for the save. HHH made another save after another Zig Zag and laid out Dolph with a Pedigree. All hope was lost (including Cena, who you would think might have come out for the save, despite him seemingly being the worst teammate EVER in the buildup to this match) but instead STING debuted, laid out HHH and put Ziggler on top of Rollins (who hadn’t moved for about eight minutes) for the final pin.

So yeah, STING debuted. That was up there with Cena turning heel and the Streak being broken on the list of things that I won’t believe until I see for myself. He laid out HHH with a Death Drop (incredible selling by the Game) and gave Ziggler the pin because Sting fights against corrupt authority. This was the big moment that people are going to remember and likely sets up the big match at Wrestlemania.

The match itself was all about the drama and it knocked that out of the park. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest on those near falls and the and I had to see who was going to win in the end. They did a great job of making me guess and that’s all you’re supposed to do in something like this. Sting coming out was a great shock and the whole thing worked like a charm.

Overall, no one is going to remember anything but the main event and Sting debuting. It’s not a great or even really good show, but the main event was all it was supposed to be and a lot more. Sting debuting is one of the moments that you’re going to remember for years to come, even if it doesn’t go anywhere long term. The main event rocked the house and made you forget how horrible the rest of the show, save for Ambrose vs. Wyatt, really was. Good stuff for the most part but just fast forward past most of it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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More On The Punk Interview

Now that I’ve actually listened to the whole thing, here are some far more detailed thoughts.  I basically just jotted down notes while listening so I’m skipping over a lot of stuff when he went into detail.

Punk talked about having offers for sponsorships but WWE said no, then gave them to Lesnar.  Brock having sponsorships ties back into the UFC character.  Punk having them would look like when they put Spider-Man 2 logos on the bases at ball games.  It wouldn’t have worked.

Vince freaking out over UFC is ridiculous.  Do “Lion’s Den”, “Brawl For All” or “Ken SHamrock” ring any bells?

Punk talked about Vince being out of touch.  That’s been known for 20 years and he’s been fine.

He said Cena gets mainstream stuff that Punk doesn’t get.  Could this have anything to do with Cena being the All-American boy while Punk is a loudmouth covered in tattoos?

Punk talked about fans never being happy no matter what he says.  As someone with a VERY small presence online, he’s 100% right.  You’re NEVER going to please everyone and that’s all there is to it.

He talked about making money off merchandise and WWE making far more.  Here’s something that I’ll be saying a lot: that’s standard business.

Like here for instance: Punk thinks he’s worth X, WWE thinks he’s worth Y. Punk signed for Y and worked for Y. Now if he thinks he should get more that’s fine, but he agreed to that salary and that’s all he’s entitled to.  THis will be another recurring theme.

Mentioned having a concussion and the concussion tests being bogus.  If that’s true then….I’m not sure what to do about it.

I agree on wanting a three way main event at Wrestlemania XXIX. Punk vs. Undertaker for the title could have worked as well, but Rock vs. Cena II made a FORTUNE so there was something to it.

Punk says he made himself work through it but then complains about the outcomes? Yeah he wants to be the best, but there are consequences to that.

I have no issue with him wanting to be cleared by a doctor after elbow surgery when WWE cleared him anyway. It’s his body and he deserves to have that peace of mind.

The Straight Edge Society was good, not great. Big Show shouldn’t have destroyed him that fast though.

Shouldn’t they be trying to make money with everyone?” Indeed they should.

Yes Punk beat Cena in merchandise sales and it’s impressive. Now make it last longer than a few months.

He says the Shield was his idea. Wanting to keep him, Punk wanted Hero as the third guy which I’ve heard before. Hero would have bombed in the stable.

Ryback stuff is interesting but nothing shocking really. Calling him steroid guy is interesting but he doesn’t say he saw it or anything so it’s speculation.

As for the TLC with Ryback, yeah that’s a bit nuts but again Punk probably could have shot it down (Punk had knee surgery and they were rushing him back for the TLC match then the Rock feud/rematch/Mania when he wanted time off after dropping the belt).

Wanting time off after losing the belt after holding it that long is more than reasonable. No one needed the rematch at Elimination Chamber. Saying he wasn’t going to get a rub off the Undertaker match is bogus given its history. It was better than Brock vs. HHH and about the same as Cena vs. Rock. It didn’t blow either away though. Saying he should have gone on last and saying pay him more for it being great is nonsense. He signed the contract for it and knew what he was getting paid for it.

Talking about asking questions etc., again, that’s fine but sometimes there are consequences for speaking your mind. The part timers thing still doesn’t hold up due to financial reasons.  They get those spots because they’ve earned them at the box office.  There are a lot of people that work a lot of dates and they’re not getting those spots.  WHy shouldn’t, say, Sheamus get that spot?  He works most dates but you don’t hear him complaining about part timers.

He said the casual fans are going to stop caring if he’s always losing the major show matches. As for the stock in the eyes of the casual viewer, if you only have a few chances to showcase your talents, it’s going to go up. Brock vs. Punk was Match of the Year and in matches like those, the winner is an afterthought.

Punk vs. Ryback again didn’t need to happen again after Punk vs. Lesnar. I’m with Punk on that one. He’s right on HHH vs. Axel too as that was ALL about HHH like it always was.

Punk blocking WWE on Twitter is hilarious.

He talked about no one remembering the best match at Wrestlemania because it’s all about the main event.  I present Wrestlemania 24 and 25 to say that that’s nonsense.

As for Wrestlemania XXIX pay (Punk says he should have made as much as the other top names because his match was best), that’s his opinion and it’s all he’s basing it on. He also said that Wrestlemania draws instead of the stars.  Wrestlemania isn’t the entirety of the draw and look at Wrestlemania XXIII and XXVIII if you want proof.

Not knowing where pay is coming from with the new Network stuff is indeed ridiculous.

The doctor not cutting the thing out of his back: again, it’s his body and if there are all those issues, he should yell about it.  Or, go find a non-WWE doctor to cut it out if that’s all he needed.

Hoping to channel Foley’s run in 2000 in order to get a Wrestlemania main event slot is pretty freaking stupid. He’s done all this before but it didn’t work so why would he think it would now?

It was clear that Punk was hurt in the Rumble. He said he had a concussion, they gave him a way out, he kept going. Same problem as before.

As someone who takes pride in never taking drugs/drinking/smoking etc, I’d be glad to take whatever drug test they give me.  I get that it’s not the point, but just do it and move on.  That takes ten seconds.  He’s right about fixing his injuries now but he put a lot of that on himself.

Big meeting with Vince/HHH: they’re above Punk, as they’re bosses. HHH does NOT need to wrestle Punk. He’s right about three years ago though. There’s one main event at Wrestlemania….most of the time.

So the WWE doctor was right about antibiotics but the wrong ones.

Firing him on wedding day…..yeah that’s lame. The no compete clause for UFC is laughable.

Finally, Punk says he’ll never have a working relationship with them again.  I would point you to Bret Hart as United States Champion for WWE in 2010.  Imagine that say, ten years ago.

So yeah, WWE did some stupid stuff, but at the end of the day, so many of these problems come down to Punk being hard headed and trying to get their attention with his hard work. Yeah he worked hard, but if they haven’t reacted to it yet, why in the world would he think they were going to again later?

At the end of the day, Punk sounds like Jim Cornette (and remember that he’s basically my idol in wrestling): he thinks he’s right on everything (and he is on a lot of them) but if you want to be in the big wrestling company, you have to go along with some of the corporate stuff. They all have to go along with things they don’t want to because they have thousands of stockholders to please. Much like with not being paid what he thinks he’s worth, that’s life in business.

One thing I want to emphasize: this was NOT him bashing WWE for two hours. This is him saying his version of what happened (make sure you keep that in mind. This is all from Punk’s point of view and perspective. The company has its reasons for doing things and their side should be heard as well) and voicing some of his complaints. He doesn’t rip on the talent, he doesn’t rip on the wrestling. Instead it’s him criticizing a lot of their decisions in terms that make sense.

However, all that being said, I’ll go back to the Cornette point: if you want to work for a major company and get major checks, you have to give up stuff. Punk wanted to prove he was the best at everything and he did to a degree. WWE didn’t reward him directly for that, but there was never any guarantee on their part. Assuming they paid him what they promised to in his contract, they owe him nothing from a business standpoint.

Some of the medical stuff I’ll completely go with Punk on, but if his back is that messed up, he should have gone to another doctor on his own if WWE wouldn’t do it. That’s more common sense than anything else. If WWE was pushing him too hard though, Punk should have asked for the time off. WWE gave him chances to take it off but Punk soldiered on. That’s on him.

Overall it’s a VERY interesting interview and well worth listening to in full (it’s readily available on Youtube) but don’t immediately agree with everything Punk says, because a lot of it needs to be taken with some major grains of salt. Either that or saying “Punk, that’s not how business works so quit thinking you’re more valuable than everyone else.” Punk was indeed a top star and white hot, but Cena and Rock are bigger stars no matter how you look at it. He has a point in some of the booking criticisms, but some of them come off as Punk having a swelled head. This is going to be talked about for a LONG time though and I’d heavily recommend that you listen to it yourself.  It flies by.




Mt. Saint Punk Erupts

So CM Punk was on Colt Cabana’s Art of Wrestling podcast and went OFF on WWE, Vince, HHH and everything about them in one of the best rants you’ll ever hear.  You probably should listen to it in full, but here’s the most detailed synopsis I’ve found so far.  THis is a long one but totally worth the time.

No I didn’t write this myself if that’s not clear.  My thoughts are at the bottom.

Source: http://www.cagesideseats.com/wwe/2014/11/27/7298557/cm-punk-story-walking-out-on-wwe

 

 

  • He says that while people have remarked time and again that he couldn’t change anything while sitting on his couch in Chicago he disagrees because it almost took him doing exactly that for meaningful change to occur. He indicates that while they may have done some things to spite him, he’s really happy that certain things happened the way they did. He doesn’t outright say that the Daniel Bryan run through WrestleMania 30 was because he left but he definitely hints at as much.
  • “It’s okay to be bitter about some things. That’s how you work through stuff.”
  • He remarks that he’s the happiest he’s been in a really long time. “I’m the f****** happiest I’ve been in I don’t know how long, at least three years, legitimately. I find these other things that have made me happy and I thought this thing that I loved, that I thought I loved, it just made me so miserable. All the time, it made me miserable. I guess the black and the white of it, when you boil it all down, the essence of it, was I was miserable, I was unhappy, f*** it! I made myself happy. I left. That’s what it boils down to. It wasn’t an easy decision to make but it was also a long time coming.”
  • He said there are many assumptions, like he was disgruntled with his creative direction, he was injured, he was mad about working with Triple H. “There’s an element of truth in all those things but I can’t say there was one big thing that led to my decision.” He does say that the biggest was his health.
  • He despises the term “pipe bomb” now because everyone refers to promos as that now.
  • People were calling him about sponsor money after the pipe bomb and he pitched it to Vince McMahon, who wouldn’t sign off on it. Then Brock Lesnar came in and was allowed to have sponsors on his wrestling gear.
  • The story behind the pitch to WWE on walking out with Chael Sonnen at a UFC show and how it would have been good business. Vince told him someone might die in a fight and there’s no way they could let him go. Vince was also apparently appalled at the idea of women fighting in the UFC.
  • He says the environment is “creatively toxic” and gives examples of issues like pitching something to Vince, being told “no,” and seeing John Cena doing that exact thing a week later.
  • For the fans who are cool fans of his and who would like to hear an explanation, he is giving it to them right now. For those who were demanding it and calling him a quitter, those people can go to hell. For that matter, just because you bought a t-shirt doesn’t entitle you to anything and you didn’t make him and WWE didn’t make him. “WWE was a f******pit stop.” He said he’s not defined by his job, and no one should be.
  • “That place should be the happiest place to work and they use that as some bizarre mindf***. ‘Go out there and have fun!’ It’s like ‘f*** you, this place sucks, and on top of that, you’re not f****** paying me nearly enough to do this s***.”
  • He brings up the WWE Network coming out and how he spent months asking questions and wasn’t told anything.
  • He rails on WWE for how they treat wrestlers as far as concussion protocol goes, revealing that he was working through concussions (he got one in the Royal Rumble too, and the testing for it was a joke) and a knee injury and messed up ribs. He was still in a mindset of doing what was best for “the boys” so he gutted out a lot of situations he definitely shouldn’t have.
  • When The Rock came back, he said he wanted to work babyface against a strong heel so Punk was given the choice to either turn heel or drop the WWE title to Daniel Bryan. He was told that if he turned heel and did the job, he would be owed one. So he made the sacrifice, one he admits wasn’t that big of a sacrifice. He does say he tried to politic his way into the main event of WrestleMania, making Rock vs. Cena into a three-way before they booked him against Undertaker.
  • Punk talks about WWE plans to get him a heater after WrestleMania and he reveals The Shield was his idea, believe it or not. They wanted a heel stable that would have included Punk, Big Show, Daniel Bryan, and Seth Rollins. So he pitched that they pick three guys from developmental to create the stable. They asked who he wanted and he said “Rollins, Dean Ambrose, and Chris Hero.” Triple H vetoed Hero and they put Roman Reigns in that spot instead. The idea was to put The Shield with Punk but plans changed.
  • He says the Ryback program took years off his life because of how green he is. He also calls Ryback “steroid guy” because “I call it like I see it” and reveals that Ryback kicked him in the stomach so hard during a match it broke his ribs and he never got an apology or call about it.
  • “I wrestled that match with Undertaker at WrestleMania with the biggest f****** chip on my shoulder because I knew it was going to be better than Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H and The Rock vs. John Cena.” They admitted that he should have went on last and he got “so f****** mad” before demanding that they should pay him like he went on last and they didn’t.
  • He harps on wrestlers not taking a stand against the machine, going along with stories that don’t make any sense for anyone. He said the only people who say anything are Cena and maybe Randy Orton.
  • His response to being told they wanted him to do the job to Brock Lesnar was to wonder who was coming to work the next day and, of course, being told that he would but Brock wouldn’t and there wouldn’t be a rematch at the next show. So he found a way to get excited about doing what they asked, working with Chris Jericho at Payback and Lesnar at SummerSlam, thinking it would help his case for the main event of WrestleMania the next year.
  • He takes a shot at Triple H not putting over Curtis Axel the way he had originally said he was going to, and wanting to work with him to help elevate him. Instead, they booked him with Ryback again and once again, Ryback injured him with a guerrilla press spot where he missed the table. That’s one of the things he’s bitter about.
  • Confirmed: He s*** his pants during SmackDown late last year and tells the story of tweeting it and being told he couldn’t tweet that and had to take it down. Many realized and reported on Punk unfollowing the WWE Twitter account not long after. It turns out he blocked them.
  • He complained about the pay he received from his WrestleMania match with Undertaker on the basis that he had the best match on the card and he should have been paid equal to everyone else on the card. When he found out that wasn’t the case, he was outraged by it because “no one else on that card could have laced my boots that night”. When Cabana brings up Rock being a huge movie star and that bringing in more fans, Punk says he doesn’t care and WrestleMania is what draws at this point and no one can tell him different.
  • The treatment he received for a large mass on his back was laughable, with the doctor not doing much of anything about it as it grew more and more.
  • He went into the Royal Rumble knowing that the plan for WrestleMania was for Batista vs. Randy Orton for the title to main event and his plan was to work so hard during the match that he would change their minds.
  • There’s a great story of Punk telling Rusev backstage before the Rumble match that no one gives a s*** about him and he needs to forget that Punk is supposedly a big star and get in there and really make an impression.
  • When he was told during the match that he would be eliminated by Kane, he initially responded with the idea that he would quit if Kane even touched him because his wrestler’s mentality kicked in and he wanted to finish the match.
  • During the drive to Cleveland for Raw the next night, he was miserable and looked over at his future wife, AJ Lee, who he says he knew he was going to marry and just hadn’t said anything yet, and had an epiphany wondering what he was doing with his life.
  • At Raw the night he quit, he went in and was told he was going to have to take a drug — he calls it a “p*** test” — test and considering the new policies they put in place so wrestlers who had failed previous tests could get strikes taken off their record, he was livid that he, of all people, would have to take a pIII test. He demanded to be taken care of for his various health issues and they wanted him to sign a bunch of papers and take the p*** test. That’s when he decided he was done.
  • He reveals he called a meeting with Vince McMahon and Triple H initially said he would leave but Punk told him to stay. “I do not love this anymore, I’m f****** sick, I’m f****** hurt, I’m f****** confused, I don’t know as a business what we’re doing anymore, I… every day you tell me this is a team effort but every day it’s a f****** individual effort by me to find what’s necessary to even f****** come here. It’s not fun. I have zero f****** passion for this. I’m f****** concussed, I’m f****** hurt, and alls (sic) you care about is what segment I am and how soon I can f*(***** get my gear on and when I can pea in this f****** cup. And I don’t want to do it anymore.”
  • He said he talked openly about bringing back Batista as a babyface being a horrible idea.
  • When Triple H told him that Batista took the same p*** test they were asking Punk to take, Punk asked “did you” and got no response. “Look, I thought when I re-signed three years ago, Vince, I told you if I couldn’t be all that I could be you should f****** fire me, that if I was a fraud and I was anything less and fell short of the f****** mark… I sold more shirts than John Cena until I turned heel for you, and you said you owed me one.. I worked guys that were f****** dangerous and you said you owed me one. I did all these f****** things and all I wanted was the main event of WrestleMania and it’s fine if you don’t think that is me and that I’m that caliber of a f****** superstar but then you need to f****** fire me because I do not want to be here and I do not want to be anything less. I will go somewhere else and I will get more f****** over because I know I can. You have shackled me, you have creatively stifled me, you have made this a very toxic environment, I no longer want to be here.”
  • “It boggles my mind how Daniel Bryan has not figured into your plans to be in the main event of WrestleMania because this is his f****** year. Just like two years ago it was my f****** year and I was white f****** hot just like he is now and what did you do? You fed me to this guy.” He said Vince responded to all this by saying it was just the concussion talking and that working with Triple H was like working in the main event. Punk says he turned to Triple H and said “All due respect, I do not need to wrestle you, you need to wrestle me. I do not want to wrestle you. I seriously resent you for not putting me over three years ago when you should have. That would have been best for business but you had to f****** come in and squash it. And then I had to lose to F****** Truth and Miz. It didn’t make any business sense then, it doesn’t make any business sense now, and I am in a position now where I can tell you that I don’t have to nor do I want to wrestle you at WrestleMania. I don’t care if I was supposed to win.”
  • Punk reveals he was scheduled to beat Triple H at WrestleMania and he didn’t care. “I didn’t want to give him the F****** privilege. He says Triple H never liked him and while you hear stories on the dirt sheets about various things, whenever he was in a room with Triple H there were never good vibes. “The way he would always look sideways at me, the way he always treated me.” He says he thinks Triple H believes he’s a “piece of s***.”
  • Triple H told Punk that he had the best match at WrestleMania 29 against Undertaker and that it was the main event. Punk said they can push that way of looking at it to the fans, but the main event is the match that goes on last and that’s all there is to it.
  • He says the Batista vs. Randy Orton main event plan was from an old, out of touch mind and he was really, really stoked when they made the change and put Daniel Bryan in the match and gave him his moment.
  • When Triple H again pushed that Punk was in the main event at WrestleMania 29, Punk asked if he made the same money as those who went on after him. Again, Triple H responded with silence.
  • He said Vince had tears in his eyes and gave Punk a hug, one Punk reciprocated, albeit reluctantly. Then he turned to Triple H, who had extended his hand, shook it, and said “good bye” before walking out.
  • He brings up people saying “oh my god, he walked out on his contract” and clarifies that he’s an independent contractor and he could have walked out whenever he wanted to. Plus, he didn’t do it in the middle of a program and he didn’t hold them up. There wasn’t anything advertised for him coming up. He walked when there was nothing for him.
  • Vince called him a week after he walked out and asked if he was ready to come back to work. He told Vince “no” at that time.
  • His wife, AJ, convinced him to go to a doctor in Tampa Bay and he looked at the mass in his back. He was immediately told that he had a staph infection. He was told he needed to go to a hospital and get on an antibiotic IV drip. He wondered what they would do with less time and they cut it out, and gave him antibiotics, an experience he describes as the most painful thing he’s gone through in his life. He was given three months of antibiotics and told that after working with a staph infection for three months, he could have died.
  • After catching up on sleep and feeling a lot better, he got a call from Vince saying he was suspended for two months. After thinking of the timeframe, he thinks that his suspension will come up just after WrestleMania and okay, whatever. But then it came up and he didn’t hear anything. He heard from an investor call that Vince told investors he was “on a sabbatical”. It was then that he realizes he hadn’t received a royalty check.
  • He tells the story of finding a royalty check from WWE and calling about what he should do about it. He also asked about the royalty check he had yet to receive and is told that said check was at the desk of a lawyer. He attempted to contact said lawyer and found no success. He says he got a bunch of butt dials from various people and how he called about the royalty checks. He was given the runaround from literally everyone.
  • He put the royalty check issue on the backburner because he was getting married and the Blackhawks were in the playoffs and he had a lot going on in his personal life at the time, like planning his honeymoon. Triple H texted him on June 11 asking if he had time to talk. He was upset about this, and said he had a honeymoon he was about to go to after getting married in two days. He asked for his royalties and promised to talk after his honeymoon.
  • Punk then reveals that he was fired by WWE on his wedding day and that he believes it was a calculated move. He explains that he got a FedEx and the letter was ridiculous, saying he was in breach of contract on Jan. 27 and he was forfeiting his royalties and there was a no compete clause for UFC in it.
  • He said he called a lawyer before going on his honeymoon, gave him his story, and the lawyer said “great, let’s get these motherf******.” He said he can’t talk about the terms of the settlement but does reveal he “got everything I wanted, and then some.”
  • WWE tried to get him to sign a non-disparagement agreement and he said that he wasn’t the one who was talking, they were the ones who went out in Chicago and called him a quitter on television. He said he would only consider signing the agreement if they went to Chicago and apologized while admitting they lied, that he didn’t quit, and that they fired him on his wedding day.
  • He says WWE was worried that he was going to go to TNA and his lawyer told them he isn’t interested in that and he despises professional wrestling now. He also said there won’t ever be a working relationship with WWE ever again.
  • He said he’s happy training and being married and writing comics and just living his life now.
  • He says he failed at his goal of wrestling in the main event of WrestleMania but he’s come to terms with it.

 

My thoughts on it: First and foremost, it’s obvious that Punk’s story is only his side.  I’m certainly not saying he’s lying, but you can only get so much truth out of one party’s version.

 

Here’s the big thing though: Punk can talk all he wants about how unfair things are and how he should have been in the main event all he wants.  That’s fine.  However, at the end of the day, Rock vs. Cena drew a fortune and Rock vs. Cena II drew a slightly smaller fortune.  Whether Punk was hot or not, those numbers are REALLY hard to argue against.  I still find his match with Undertaker very overrated though as I never bought him as a threat to the Streak, which I found Shawn and HHH (in the Cell at least) to be.  Yeah it was probably the match of the night but it was nothing excellent.

As for stuff I agree with him on, we’ll start with the match against HHH in 2011.  I’ve heard every possible argument about how HHH should have gone over and I don’t buy them at all.  While I don’t think he would have surpassed Cena full time as the top star, I see no reason for HHH to beat him there.  HHH has been a made man for years and was basically retired at that point, but he beat Punk anyway.  I’m not the biggest Punk fan in the world at times but that was ridiculous.  Yeah he got the long title reign out of it but, as he’s said, most of the time Cena was still in the main event (which he should have been a good deal, though not all of, the time).

As for him leaving like he did….I’m split on that.  He’s right that he didn’t have anything major going on, but if he’s right about Batista vs. Orton headlining Wrestlemania (which I don’t completely buy as true), he had a legitimate complaint.  It’s one thing for Lesnar or Rock or someone with a legitimate drawing record to come in and take a spot like that, but Batista isn’t a big enough star to validate that kind of power.  I would have liked to see Cena vs. Punk vs. Rock at Wrestlemania XXIX, but I see why WWE went the way they did.  As for XXX, as Punk said, it was Bryan’s year.

Overall he makes a ton of valid points, but a lot of it comes off like the same fanboy comments you hear all over the place.  Yes he was hot, but if that doesn’t translate to business, it’s not something that can be done.  That being said, I think they screwed up by having HHH beat him in 2011 and giving him the title as a consolation prize instead of as the big prize for him.

 

It’s very interesting stuff, but don’t immediately take it all as gospel.  Also, I know he said he’ll never be back, but would you have believed that Bret Hart would not only come back in 2010 but win a title in WWE?  Keep that in mind.




Wrestler of the Day – November 19: Orlando Jordan

Today is Orlando Jordan. Let’s get this over with.

Allegedly Jordan got started in 1999 but I can’t find anything on him until 2002 in OVW. However we’ll start on Smackdown, July 31, 2003.

John Cena vs. Orlando Jordan

Cena is still heel here and raps about almost beating Undertaker at Vengeance recently. He even makes gay jokes about Undertaker and Jordan, which would be far more interesting later on. Jordan charges the ring and blasts Cena in the face to take over early. John will have none of that though and chokes Jordan down onto the mat. He goes after Jordan’s ribs and just grabs his face to block a sunset flip. Jordan fights out of the corner with right hands but walks into the FU for the pin.

Jordan would become JBL’s Chief of Staff in 2004, earning him this match on August 12, 2004.

Undertaker vs. Orlando Jordan

That’s not a bad way to start a second hour. The big man dominates to start with shoulders and a backdrop. Old School is countered with rights and lefts in the corner but Undertaker hammers away, knocking Jordan senseless. Undertaker avoids a charge in the corner and nails the chokeslam but JBL offers a distraction. That’s fine with Taker as Old School plants Jordan again.

A running DDT gets two on Orlando but he slips out of a tombstone attempt and hits Undertaker low. They head outside with Orlando managing to whip Undertaker into the steps. Back in and Jordan hammers away with more punches (actually fits because he used to be a boxer) but Undertaker nails him and loads up the tombstone, only to get nailed by the Clothesline From JBL for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Shockingly good match here with both guys working hard, even though the match was short. Jordan would of course never amount to anything while Undertaker was still getting his wheels back under him after becoming the Dead Man again. Not a great match or anything but it was a big surprise.

JBL would enter his last feud as champion against John Cena. As a loyal minion, Jordan took Cena on in a US Title match on Smackdown, March 3, 2005.

US Title: John Cena vs. Orlando Jordan

Champion Cena powers him down for two to start and a release fisherman’s suplex gets the same. A big side slam sets up the Shuffle and Jordan is in big trouble. Orlando bails to the floor and we take a break. Back with a hiptoss putting Jordan down for another two before we hit the chinlock. Jordan’s cross body is countered into a slam for three straight near falls as this has been one sided. John stomps him down in the corner and we’re back in the chinlock.

Orlando FINALLY goes to the eyes to get a breather and a rollup with feet on the ropes gets two. Cena rolls through a high cross body for about the tenth near fall of the match. Ten right hands in the corner have Jordan in even more trouble but he comes out with a powerbomb. The amateur boxer (Jordan) hammers away even more and now it’s the champ in a chinlock. A legdrop gets two on Cena and we’re right back to the chinlock. Cena fights out but walks into a powerslam for two.

Back up again and Cena hits a flying shoulder but misses the second to put both guys down. Jordan is up first and grabs Cena’s chain, only to have Cena throw it out to the floor. The Throwback (a running flip faceplant) gets two more on Jordan and there’s the ProtoBomb. There’s the FU but the Bashams (more JBL lackeys) run in for a distraction, allowing JBL to grab the title belt. JBL clocks Cena upside the head and Jordan has the biggest upset in like, ever.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t great but they had to get the title off Cena somehow so they could head to the big moment at Wrestlemania. At the end of the day though, it’s Orlando Jordan pinning John Cena for a title. There’s no real way this can be right. The match was a lot of Cena dominating before Jordan got in some actually decent power stuff.

Here’s a title defense at Judgment Day 2005.

US Title: Orlando Jordan vs. Heidenreich

Jordan got the US Title in JBL’s Cabinet from Cena and just kind of kept it. He was never anything special at all but he kept it for like 6 months. For those of you that haven’t seen Heidenreich, he’s uh…..different. And remember who he’s in there against when I say that. First up though, he needs to find a friend.

This was his thing at the time: he would pick a kid out of the audience to be his friend and would read them a poem. He chants WHERE’S MY FRIEND as he looks around for one. The girl is named Alex and she’s like 10. She can’t say the word Minneapolis. She’s REALLY excited about being sat in a chair and having a big tattooed man read her a poem. Also, chant and champ do not rhyme. This is one of those characters we would describe as out there.

Oh hey we have a match now. Cole talks about the Preakness winner being named Alex like the girl. That’s a very stupid man. Heidenreich beat Jordan on Smackdown to set this up. Belly to belly suplex gets two for Heidenreich. Out to the floor and they slug it out a bit. When Heidenreich hits him you can hear him say POW. I’m not sure if I should make fun of this or not. He might ask me to go get an espresso.

The fans chant Buckwheat Sucks which is rather appropriate for Jordan. You figure out what I mean by that. Heidenreich does his walk (don’t ask) and hammers away. Big boot gets two. Jordan gets a swinging neckbreaker for two as Alex is panicking. Jordan gets his WEAK DDT to end this abruptly.

Rating: D-. No idea why they thought Jordan should be champion but somehow he’s the best option here. Jordan was really bad at what he did and yet he kept winning for no apparent reason. Benoit beat him in like 30 seconds at Summerslam which was a breath of fresh air to everyone.

Another at Great American Bash 2005.

US Title: Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

Jordan is champion and has been since March, beating Cena for the title. Yes, this guy kept the title like six months for absolutely no apparent reason. He has stupid looking puffed up hair here too. Benoit hammers him down to start as Orlando isn’t all that talented. Jordan tries to kick him in the knee and Benoit just chops him down. The champ tries working on the arm but Benoit leg drags him down and we go to the floor.

Benoit goes into the post and Jordan takes the buckle off. That lets the Canadian hit a German on the American to take over. There was no story to this other than Benoit beat Booker to get this shot. Jordan works on the neck for a second and then fires off punches. He used to be a boxer apparently. Ok so now Jordan is on the arm. PICK A BODY PART AND STICK WITH IT!!!

A dropkick puts Benoit down which Tazz tries to pass off as a big impressive move. Back to the arm and this match needs to end already. I’ve been thinking that a lot in this show. Benoit grabs a Sharpshooter attempt to try to get something going but Jordan would rather bore us to death. Jordan hooks something like a crossface chickenwing and then off to the neck because he worked on it for a few seconds earlier.

Jordan goes up but Benoit chops him down and hits a superplex off the top to put both guys down. Another Sharpshooter attempt fails but here are the Rolling Germans. I’m still not sure what popping your hips means. Swan dive gets two after a delay. Benoit chops away but Orlando’s head smacks into Benoit’s to put Chris down. Jordan finishes taking the pad off the buckle and a charging Benoit hits that for the pin to keep the title on Jordan. Yes they really did this. Benoit would win it at Summerslam in like 30 seconds.

Rating: D. Again the problem here is that Jordan is just boring. He’s as generic as anyone could ask for and I don’t think he had an actual finishing move. He might have used a DDT once in awhile. Imagine Honky Tonk Man’s offense, minus anything resembling charisma or ability in the ring. And he held the title for SIX MONTHS!

Benoit had another shot in the opening match at Summerslam 2005.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan, the most worthless wrestler I can think of at the moment, is defending. He took the title from Cena of all people and defended it over the course of the summer. In some of the smartest booking you’ll ever see to open a show, Benoit shoves him into the corner, snaps off a German suplex and puts Jordan in the Crossface for the submission and the title in 25 seconds.

When a guy is so bad that you can’t trust Chris Benoit with him on live TV, this is the right move. Benoit would go on to show how fast the match was by timing how long it took him to do things like go to the bathroom or have a cup of coffee, each of which lasted longer than the match. Brilliant stuff here and the crowd is instantly on fire.

Here’s the rematch at No Mercy 2005.

US Title: Booker T vs. Christian vs. Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending, Booker gets a big pop as the hometown guy and this is one fall to a finish. Benoit beat Jordan in like 25 seconds at Summerslam to win the title. Why he’s in this match is beyond me. Jordan goes after Benoit and takes him down so the heels (Christian/Jordan) can double team Booker. Booker knocks Christian to the floor and kicks Jordan down but Christian pulls him to the outside.

Benoit pops up out of nowhere with a Crossface on Jordan but Christian saves. With Booker on the floor, Benoit cleans house on the other two. Suplexes all around and Christian is put in a quickly broken up Sharpshooter. Booker comes off the top with a missile dropkick to take Christian down as it’s his turn to be in control. Jordan and Christian are knocked to the floor so we get a staredown between Booker and Benoit.

They don’t really do much though as Christian comes in and is suplexed over the top with ease. Benoit goes to the floor to fight his fellow Canadian as Booker and Jordan clothesline each other down. Christian breaks up the Swan Dive by fighting Benoit on the top. Jordan is whipped into them and the Canadians hit the floor. Booker rolls up Jordan for a VERY close two. Benoit comes back in and walks into a side kick.

Cole reminds us that everyone is legal at the same time. Thanks Cole. The first seven minutes of this match didn’t tell me that. Axe kick gets two on Jordan. Christian throws Benoit into Booker to knock Booker to the floor but Christian can’t hit the Unprettier on Benoit. Benoit tries Rolling Germans but Orlando breaks it up.

Orlando is thrown out onto Booker, leaving the Canadians in the ring. After four Germans Benoit misses the Swan Dive. Christian tries a rollup but Benoit reverses into the Crossface. Orlando seems to miss his cue on the save as he takes forever. Jordan is sent to the floor and the Sharpshooter makes Christian tap.

Rating: C. This seems like a match that belonged on a house show. It wasn’t that bad but I don’t think anyone was really expecting a new champion here. Benoit was on a roll at this point and would hold the title for about six more months. It’s not a bad match but it was more of a Benoit showcase than a competitive match.

Jordan wouldn’t do much until he was released in the middle of 2006. After spending 2007 in Japan and the first half of 2008 in Europe, he somehow had this match for the NWA World Title in Spain on June 25, 2008.

NWE Championship: Orlando Jordan vs. Ultimate Warrior

It’s more of an awkward looking jog than a run. Orlando jumps Warrior during the rope shaking and hammers away in the corner, only to have the painted one comeback with kicks and chops. A backdrop puts Jordan down and he bails to the floor. Warrior’s paint is already peeling off. Back in and Orlando gets in a few shots, only to be rammed into the corner. A running clothesline puts the champion on the floor again and Warrior hammers on his own chest a bit.

Orlando stalls on the floor for a long time before coming back in to trade some hammerlocks. Jordan can’t keep a rear waistlock on for very long as Warrior powers into one of his own. They hit the mat for a bit as the match is quickly breaking down. Another backdrop puts Jordan outside and Warrior is clearly gassed. He follows Orlando outside and they fight in the confetti with Jordan in control.

Back in and Jordan mocks the chest beating, only to get taken down by a shoulder block. A powerslam gets two and a superplex to Jordan brings both guys down to the mat. Orlando is up first but Warrior starts shaking the ropes and hits the clotheslines. Warrior actually goes up for a nice cross body but the splash hits knees. He pops right back up though and hits some clotheslines and a bad shoulder for the pin and the title. No slam or splash?

Rating: D. This just wasn’t very good. I have no idea who thought giving this match 17 minutes was a good idea when Warrior barely made it through 14 minutes back in 1998. There was a lot of standing around but it didn’t really help. Warrior was clearly out of energy about five minutes in and it was becoming more sad than anything else.

Jordan would get signed by TNA because they would take anyone at the time. Here he is with a title shot at Sacrifice 2010.

Global Title: Rob Terry vs. Orlando Jordan

Were told that Terry has never turned down a title defense. What has he had? Two of them? They call this a battle of the freaks. Ok then. Jordan is lowered from the ceiling into the ring. Taz says its better than walking to the ring with a black towel on your head. Ok that was a funny line. Terry is called the Global Champion of the World.

So dont pay attention to that Venezuelan Global Champion. Hes got JACK on Terry. Terry has come a long way in the last few months. Who would believe him having passable matches (given who he is) a few months ago? They list off the people hes defended against. Wow they sound pitiful. This has been all Terry here. Jordan goes for the knee which makes a bit of sense I suppose.

Jordan cant even drop a knee properly. Thats hard to do. It truly is. Oh and the flamboyant and bizarre guy is wearing gold. Nothing stolen there at all. The fans thing Terry Wants It apparently. WOW I want to smack those people. And theres the spinebuster (Not calling it the Freakbuster or whatever Tenay called it) for the pin. That came out of nowhere. I SAID IT FIRST TAZ! SHUT UP!

Rating: D. Why in the world do these two get a decent amount of time on PPV? Again, Jordan is shock value for the sake of shock value. I defy anyone to say hes valuable to the company or worth any kind of money he gets. What has he ever won that anyone (who doesn’t read my stuff) going to remember?

Here he is at Bound For Glory 2010 in a COMEDY team.

Orlando Jordan/Eric Young vs. Ink Inc.

Ink Inc. is a tattooed team comprised of Shannon Moore and Jesse Neal. This is the result of an Xplosion match and Eric is carrying a rulebook and has drawn on tattoos for some reason. Oh this is during Young’s latest crazy period. Jordan and Jesse get things going but Young quickly puts the referee on the apron and takes his place. Things settle down and Jesse gets two off a spinning cross body and it’s off to Shannon for a kick to the face and two.

Young comes in and gets rolled up for two so he congratulates Shannon for his success. He high fives everyone, including a tag to Jordan. Ink Inc. kicks Jordan in the corner and Eric wants to join in, only to get crotched on the top rope. Jordan gets crotched right along with him as comedy abounds. Back in and Orlando grinds on Shannon before planting him with a spinebuster. The fans want Eric but get a Jordan suplex for two on Moore.

Young breaks up Jordan’s cheating to give Moore another two count and now Orlando doesn’t want to tag. Instead Jordan nails Jesse and holds Moore open for a cheap shot but Eric goes over and takes Jesse’s place on the apron. Moore tags Eric in because why not and Young cleans house on Jordan. In the confusing, Shannon loads Jordan up in a fireman’s carry so Neal can hit a top rope neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: D. If you like Eric Young’s comedy, this was gold. If you’re like me and he makes you want to pound a rusty spike into your eye, this was the longest eight and a half minutes of your life. I will however give him this: at least this was something different than the same four things he would do for years on end.

Here’s a four way for the sake of a four way on Impact, April 14, 2011.

Jesse Neal vs. Douglas Williams vs. Crimson vs. Orlando Jordan

Winner gets….a win I guess. All of the partners are at ringside and Moore gets after Steiner. Orlando looks to be in a purple dress for lack of a better term. Neal vs. Williams to start but the British dude tags in Jordan quickly. Side slam gets two and its off to Crimson vs. Neal. TBone suplex gets two but Neal hits his spear on Crimson. Moore keeps making fun of Steiner and distracting Neal. Moore finally pushes him and the fight is on. Steiner goes out to help him so were down to a three way.

Crimson goes off to help but heres Abyss to jump Crimson. Magnus and Young fight on the floor as Abyss rips up the railing. Chokeslam onto the guardrail leaves Crimson laying as the match is down to Jordan vs. Williams for all intents and purposes. Jordan grinds on Williams and gets a clothesline for two. Young and Magnus come in which goes nowhere as Jordan hits something like Cross Rhodes (called the Gender Bender) to end it at 3:35.

Rating: D. Considering the fact that about seventy five percent of this match was spent on the stuff outside and what you saw in the ring was nothing special at all, what are you supposed to say here? Weak match to build to a match that really shouldn’t be in a cage. It’s always a problem with Lockdown but rarely a big one. Weak match though.

We’ll wrap it up with Jordan’s last major match to date at Lockdown 2011.

Ink Inc vs. Scott Steiner/Crimson vs. Orlando Jordan/Eric Young vs. British Invasion

Jordans outfit of the night is a Tarzan leopard print kind of deal. I think this is one fall to a finish. Young vs. Neal to start us off with Young immediately trying to escape which isnt an option for winning. Neal with some arm drags followed by Young with an arm drag leading to a standoff. Moore comes in and takes over with basic heel stuff.

Williams and Jordan get tags at the same time and its off to Magnus very quickly. Jordan does various dirty things to Magnus while beating both Brits up. Off to Neal again as this is moving too fast, namely due to having too many people in the match again. The Brits beat down Neal for a bit and a double back elbow gets two. Double neckbreaker gets no count as Moore makes the save.

The crowd wants Steiner so we keep going with Neal vs. Magnus because the crowd wasnt quite dead enough. Neal breaks free and tags Crimson when he was wide open to tag either. After Crimson beats on Williams for a bit we FINALLY get Steiner and a roar. Steiner cleans house with his traditional stuff, including belly to bellies all around. He goes for the pin on Williams but Moore distracts him.

Young tries to jump Steiner and Crimson is fine with his partner fighting off four or five guys. Shannon makes a blind tag to bring himself in. He dances around Scott and then chokes away in the corner. Young takes his pants off to reveal some tiny tiger print tights. And so much for that as a jumping back elbow takes him down.

Everything breaks down as Moore hits a moonsault press to Williams, Young hits the Gender Bender to Young, Crimson hits Red Alert to Jordan, Magnus hits….something like a Michinoku Driver to Jordan, Steiner hits a tbone on Magnus, Young hits a missile dropkick to Steiner….and then tries to escape again. Rolling Chaos to Moore is blocked and the Mooregasm ends Williams and gives Ink Inc the win. I give up.

Rating: D. Dudes, I beg of you: GIVE THE FANS SOMETHING TO CHEER FOR! Steiner was over beyond belief and was in the match for all of a minute. The opening 45 minutes of this show should be a lesson in how to kill a crowd. Nothing has been interesting and the best match has been ok at best. Well done TNA: you’ve proven me right so far.

At the end of the day, Orlando Jordan just isn’t that good. His in ring work wasn’t very good, his character was a disaster, his feuds are forgettable and there’s nothing about him worth remembering. There are definitely worse guys out there, but his stuff in TNA was just so ridiculous that it drags a relatively average guy through the floor.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Monday Night Raw – November 24, 2014: And We Take A Break

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 24, 2014
Location: Bankers Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re coming off one of the most eventful main events in a very long time as Sting actually debuted last night after roughly thirteen years of waiting. Team Cena prevailed over Team Authority with Dolph Ziggler actually hanging on until the end after Cena was eliminated when Big Show turned heel. Again. Other than that we’ve got less than three weeks before TLC and what might be the main event is already set with Dean Ambrose set to face Bray Wyatt in a Tables, Ladders and Chairs match. Let’s get to it.

We open with the required recap of last night’s show.

Here’s the Authority to open things up because where would we be without them? Stephanie talks about how unfair last night was and blames the loss on Sting. They stand before you tonight as winners instead of losers because they still have corporate responsibilities. Stephanie starts crying and the fans chant YES. HHH knows there is no one here that could handle the Authority’s power.

We live in a universe governed by the laws of finance and commerce. They have to make decisions based on supply and demand, not what’s popular. Is Cena going to do that? Ziggler? Sting maybe? HHH doesn’t know why Sting did that last night but maybe he was trying to make his career relevant by standing in the ring with HHH for thirty seconds.

He goes into a speech from the end of A Few Good Men (almost word for word) before asking who makes the decisions now. There is no Cena, Ziggler or Ryback without the Authority and there is no WWE Universe. What are the fans going to do without Raw now? They can sit on a couch and live in their pathetic failures, because the Authority is going to leave now, but you all will beg for them to come back.

Cue Daniel Bryan of all people for one of the biggest YES chants this side of Wrestlemania. He doesn’t say anything but does the YES pose all the way up the aisle, right in the Authority’s face. That certainly woke the fans up and that’s exactly what you bring a guy like Bryan back for. Bryan stays in the ring as we go to a break.

Back from commercial with Bryan talking about how great it feels to be back in this ring tonight. It felt great to kick the Authority to the curb, but that brings him to Team Authority. As for tonight, Bryan is in charge of Raw and asks all of the losing members of Team Authority to come out here right now. Cole calls each member a loser because Cole doesn’t understand the meaning of the words “subtle” or “neutral”.

Bryan says he won’t be vindictive like the Authority so no titles are in danger and no one is being put in unfair matches. We’ll start with Rollins, who tonight gets to team with two superstars to face Cena and Ziggler. Rollins grabs a mic but it doesn’t work at first so we get some quick banter between him and Bryan.

Seth holds up the briefcase and says he’s still the future of this company. He thinks his partners will be something like Hornswoggle and El Torito or JBL and Cole. Bryan won’t be making the selections though. Instead, it’s in the WWE Universe’s hands. Daniel however, does get to pick the options. It will either be Mark Henry/Luke Harper, Mark Henry/Kane or the Stooges.

Bryan starts the voting as Rollins runs down the Stooges as being pretty bad at their job before storming off. Next up is Kane, who really shouldn’t be Director of Operations anymore. Bryan puts it up to the people and they give him a resounding NO. He won’t fire Kane but he will reassign him. Starting tonight, Kane is Director of Food and Drink, meaning he’ll be known as Concessions Kane. A guy brings out popcorn and hot dogs for Kane to carry throughout the night as we’re in comedy mode.

That brings us to Rusev and Lana. Bryan thinks the US Champion should be a bit more patriotic so he has some options. Rusev can either defend the title in a battle royal against the rest of the roster, or he can pledge allegiance to a big US flag in the middle of the ring. Lana freaks out as the crowd chants USA.

After they storm off, it’s Harper’s chance. He won the title last week with the help of the Stooges (“who you can vote for as Option C on the WWE App!”), but tonight he’s having to go it alone. Bryan needs an opponent for him though, so how about the Lunatic Fringe Dean Ambrose?

That leaves just Henry, who tries to leave before Bryan can do anything for him. Bryan was backstage when a big guy came up to him and asked for a favor. Naturally Bryan said yes because that’s his thing, so tonight a guy is going to get his chance to avenge his loss to Mark Henry a few years back at Wrestlemania, so tonight it’s Henry vs. Ryback. Bryan gave him the match because he’s running Raw tonight, and “THAT’S WHAT I DO!”

Mark Henry vs. Ryback

Ryback jumps him from the aisle and sends Henry head first into the post. He drives Henry into the barricade a few times but referees pull him off as we go to a break without a bell. Back with the opening bell and Henry already staggered. He’s still able to knock Ryback down a few times but Ryback comes back with a spinebuster. The Meat Hook connects for the pin at 55 seconds.

HHH and Stephanie are walking through the back when they run into Vince. Stephanie apologizes for letting them down but Vince says he isn’t an angry man. He is however disappointed by the two of them coming up against insurmountable odds. Somehow, someway the two of them have to fix this though. Vince yells at Stephanie for being sorry because he’s never been sorry for a thing in his life. That might change when he has to spend Thanksgiving with them though. All three leave in a limo with Vince still ranting about sorry.

Intercontinental Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper

Luke hammers away to start and drives in some shots to the throat in the corner. Dean takes him right back down and drives in crossface shots to the nose. It’s off to the arm of all things with Harper in early trouble. Luke is sent to the floor for a big dive as we take a break. Back with Harper holding a chinlock but Dean fights up, only to be sent chest first into the buckle.

Ambrose fights back with right hands but his boot to the ribs is caught and Harper shoves it back, sending Dean face first onto the mat. After a quick chinlock, Harper sends him out to the floor yet again. Another whip sends Dean into the barricade but Ambrose comes back with a hard clothesline. They head back inside with Dean grabbing a rollup for two and a crossbody for the same.

Harper gets tied up in the ropes for the running dropkick, followed by the Fameasser to drive Harper face first into the mat for two. Dean hammers away until Harper grabs the sitout Boss Man Slam for two of his own. Ambrose breaks up a superplex attempt and hits his standing elbow drop, only to eat a superkick. That’s fine with Dean who hits the Rebound Clothesline for two more. The champ goes and gets his title but Dean hits the suicide dive to prevent him from walking out. Back in and Harper fights off Dirty Deeds until he shoves Dean into the referee…..for the DQ at 14:39.

Rating: C. This took awhile to get going but I liked that they didn’t just have Bray run in for the DQ like I was expecting. The ending was stupid but at least they kept both guys looking strong. Dean facing the former Wyatt Family is a good idea, though I’m glad they didn’t put the title on him. The feud doesn’t need to be for a belt.

Post match Dean gets a chair and hits Dirty Deeds before bringing in a table and ladder. Bray sneaks in through the crowd and lays him out though, including Sister Abigail on the floor.

Big E. New Day video.

Here are Santino Marella and Larry the Cable Guy with the latter in a mask, shorts and no shirt. Larry says he’s ready to go King Kong Bundy on someone but Santino says we’re not here to wrestle. He takes off the mask and apologizes for all the eye candy. Larry says he beat up Savage one night in Florida. Santino: “Randy Savage???” Larry: “No, Fred.” The Cable Guy says he’s a fan of Steve Austin and says he’d be Stone Cold Creamery (Cold Stone Creamery is an ice cream store chain). Cue Goldust and Stardust to get in Larry’s face and that’s it.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Goldust/Stardust

Miz/Mizdow are defending and Mizdow has toy titles again. Stardust slams Miz to start but misses an elbow. Miz tries to tag out but Stardust takes him into the corner for a chest rake. It’s off to Goldust for an atomic drop, meaning Mizdow comes in to mock an atomic drop of his own. Miz dives into a punch to the ribs and Stardust breaks up another tag attempt by knocking Miz to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Stardust in control of Miz until a jawbreaker puts both guys down. The hot tag brings in Mizdow to clean house to a big reaction. He nails a quick Reality Check on Stardust and actually nips up. Stardust snaps his throat across the top though and things slow down again with Goldust holding a chinlock as a trainer checks on Miz.

A powerslam gets two on Mizdow and Stardust’s release gordbuster gets the same. Miz is telling the trainer to stay off the face as Mizdow makes his comeback and puts Starudst in the Figure Four, only to have Goldust make the save. Mizdow sends him outside but Miz makes a blind tag and hits the Skull Crushing Finale on Stardust to retain at 10:16.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it continues the story as we get closer to Mizdow’s face turn. It would be nice if he started backing up the character in the ring and we got a glimpse of that tonight. Nothing great here but I’m glad they didn’t change the titles back just a night later.

The concessions manager yells at Kane and puts him in charge of chips.

Lana says this isn’t fair, just like America. Daniel Bryan pops up on screen and gives him them the same options, but gives us a supervisor to make sure it works well. Cue Sgt. Slaughter as the big flag comes down. Sarge leads them in the Pledge but Rusev won’t bring himself to do it. Rusev stands there for awhile and finally throws the mic down. It’s time to fight and Slaughter takes off the hat but Jack Swagger comes in for the save. This story again?

Kane gives fans food when Santino and Larry show up in line. Santino winds up wearing mustard and Larry gets a hot dog because Kane is a fan.

Fandango vs. Justin Gabriel

Rematch of the pre-show match last night. Fandango hits a hard elbow to the jaw to start but Justin knocks him off the top rope. A big clothesline flips Justin inside out though as Rosa looks on from ringside. The top rope legdrop ends Gabriel at 1:57.

Here’s a smiling Big Show in a suit for his explanation about last night. He wants to make sure everything is cool because he saw a lot of things online that didn’t sit well with him. Last night he did some things and now people see him as a bad guy. In reality he’s a human being who made a mistake.

Surely everyone has done that before though, so the people should be able to forgive him. He has a medical condition that makes him this big, but on the inside he’s a person just like us. Last night he saw John Cena vulnerable and did what he thought he had to do. Big Show is sure that everyone can forgive him because he wouldn’t have done that if he knew Team Cena was going to win anyway. He’s been putting his body on the line for the last twenty years and maybe the fans owe him this one.

The fans say he sold out and Big Show gets angry in a hurry. He’s heard all those people in the back that are calling him a coward and wants one of them to come out right now. Cue Erick Rowan, who Show calls an upside down Sheamus. Show could understand if this was John Cena or someone, but Erick Rowan? He mocks Rowan a bit before Rowan takes off the mask. That earns Erick a warning to leave before he gets hurt but Rowan says he doesn’t like bullies and the fight is on. Show is quickly knocked to the floor and he breaks the steps before leaving.

The Stooges come up to Rollins in the back and are both about a foot shorter. Ziggler comes in and says he’s asked his 1.4 million Twitter followers to vote for the Stooges.

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee

AJ comes out with the mic and says Nikki has turned the title into a new accessory. As for Brie, “lesbihonest”, she’s an even bigger skank than her sister. Nikki offers a quick distraction so Brie can nail a hard clothesline for two. We hit a hammerlock for a bit before AJ fights up for a quick Shining Wizard for two. Nikki shouts about Brie Mode and another distraction lets Brie grab a rollup for the pin at 3:22.

Rating: D. The Bellas continue to drag down whatever segment they’re in. I know WWE thinks we care about them because they’re on a reality show but for the love of all things good and holy they’re just another pair of lame Divas. Yeah they’ve had their moments, but they’re treated like the second coming of Trish and Lita and it just doesn’t work.

AJ yells at the Bellas post match and says talent is not sexually transmitted.

Adam Rose/The Bunny vs. Tyson Kidd/Natalya

Larry the Cable Guy and Santino are on commentary to dance with the Bunny. Rose grabs him by the ears and throws him into the ring for some yelling. Rose tags out to the Bunny tos tart and it’s time for comedy. The Bunny hits a quick middle rope dropkick and stomps on Tyson in the corner. Tyson finally smacks the Bunny in the face before it’s off to Natalya….who immediately tags back to Tyson. Jerry explains the idea of the match (both teams are having relationship problems) as Ada gets two off a spinebuster. The Bunny trips Rose by mistake and Kidd hooks a rollup for the pin at 3:58.

Rating: D. We’re to the point now where there’s only so much more they can do before they unmask the Bunny. That being said, there needs to be a good reveal and I’m really not sure who is going to be a big enough deal. Larry and Santino were just kind of there and have to do stuff like this for promoting a DVD and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Ryback wants to find the concession stand.

New Day video with all three together. They’re debuting next week.

Ryback shows up to the concession stand and asks for two cans of tuna, a protein shake and a can of beef jerkey. Kane throws a hot dog at him instead so Ryback shoves the table into him. The Big Red Machine throws popcorn and ketchup at him and leaves. Ryback throws a bag of nuts at Kane and that’s it. Funny right?

Cena is in the back with Ziggler and praises Dolph for his win last night. Ziggler says he promised to find a way to survive and that’s exactly what he did. However, it took a miracle in the form of the man called Sting. Cena thanks Sting and Ziggler for changing history and giving the fans all the power. They’re going to steal the show tonight.

John Cena/Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins/???/???

Bryan comes out before the match to introduce Rollins and the partners. In a vote closer than I was expecting, the Stooges win with 93% of the vote. They come out in their suits and it’s time to fight. Noble starts with Cena but Rollins makes him take his tie off. The look on Rollins’ face is hysterical as Cena lets Noble grab a headlock. Mercury comes in and runs the ropes, only to accidentally knock his partner down. Seth has to break up an AA attempt and they go outside for a breather as we take a break.

Back with Cena in a bit of trouble until Noble misses a charge into the post. The hot tag brings in Ziggler for some clotheslines and the running DDT to Noble, but a Mercury distraction lets Rollins nail him to take over. Back to Noble for a slam and a legdrop for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit until Ziggler pops up with a dropkick. Mercury comes in and allows the hot tag to Cena as house is cleaned. Everything breaks down and the Stooges try to save Rollins. This earns them a whip into each other and an AA and Zig Zag for the pin at 10:05.

Rating: D. Yeah it was bad but what else are you expecting here? Rollins not getting pinned is fine but the match really wasn’t anything to see. Cena and Ziggler beating up the Stooges is fine, even if a bit boring. This was a dull way to end a dull show though and I really didn’t care.

Bryan throws Rollins into the ring for a superkick and AA of his own. Posing looks to end the show…..but we have an e-mail from the general manager. The fans groan as Cole says the line. The party is officially over because next week is Cyber Monday when order and discipline return to Raw. The e-mail sound goes off over and over to close the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Tonight wasn’t very good but it really wasn’t supposed to be anything big. This was the show taking a night off after such a big show last night and while it’s annoying, its kind of necessary as we’re setting up the mostly meaningless TLC show before the Rumble season begins. The show wasn’t much to see but nothing on it was all that terrible. That’s more than I can say about Raw a lot of the time so we’ll call this one a dull effort.

Results

Ryback b. Mark Henry – Meat Hook

Luke Harper b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Ambrose hit the referee

Miz/Damien Mizdow b. Goldust/Stardust – Skull Crushing Finale to Stardust

Fandango b. Justin Gabriel – Top rope legdrop

Brie Bella b. AJ Lee – Rollup

Tyson Kidd/Natalya b. Adam Rose/The Bunny – Rollup to Rose

Dolph Ziggler/John Cena b. Seth Rollins/Jamie Noble/Joey Mercury – Zig Zag to Mercury

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6