WrestleMania Count-Up – WrestleMania XXXIV (2019 Edition): Last Year’s Prototype

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Titus O’Neil, Luke Gallows, Dash Wilder, Chad Gable, Curt Hawkins, Scott Dawson, Primo Colon, Kane, Curtis Axel, Apollo, Tye Dillinger, Rhyno, Aiden English, Matt Hardy, Tyler Breeze, Mike Kanellis, Karl Anderson, Mojo Rawley, R-Truth, Sin Cara, Dolph Ziggler, Viktor, Shelton Benjamin, Goldust, Bo Dallas, Zack Ryder, Baron Corbin, Heath Slater, Konnor, Fandango

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Ali heads to the apron and gets enziguried down, setting up the big flip dive to the floor and…actually not a break. Back in and Cedric starts in on the ribs with a waistlock, followed by a heck of a backdrop for two. Ali gets out of another waistlock and faceplants him for two as Alexander looks focused while being in pain. The running Spanish Fly drops Ali again and it takes both of them time to get up. They’re doing a rather good job of showing how even these two are, which is what you should be doing in a tournament final.

Ali is up first and tries a tornado DDT but gets placed on top, where Ali catches him with a super Spanish Fly, shocking even Cena. The 054 is loaded up but Cedric knocks him off the top for a huge crash to the floor. That’s not serious so let’s go split screen for a Ronda Rousey ad. I mean…fair enough. Back in the Lumbar Check is countered, setting up Ali’s awesome tornado DDT.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

The Usos are defending after the Bludgeon Brothers destroyed both other teams last month at Fastlane. Woods plays the trombone (using the same tune that would summon the Dragonzord on Mighty Morphin Power Rangers)…to bring out a fleet of small people dressed as stacks of pancakes, some of whom do the Worm. I still don’t get why pancakes are supposed to be funny, but anyone who plays a trombone like the Dragon Dagger (that thing was IMPOSSIBLE to find back in the day) is cool with me.

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

Post match they hug in a copy of the earlier match where the Japanese winner of the Royal Rumble was defeated in the title match. Nakamura kneels to him and presents AJ with the title…before hitting him low for a heel turn which should have led to him winning the title. It kind of did, but the US Title instead of the World Title, which is why Nakamura is nowhere near as big a deal just a year later. Also, why should I want to see AJ face Nakamura again when he just beat him clean? Nakamura hits him with two Kinshasas before leaving.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

We get the Big Match Intros and Strowman takes the mic to introduce the partner. It’s not someone in the locker room….because it’s one of the fans. Strowman looks around, looks around some more, and then points at someone in the crowd. He walks into the crowd, walks around some more…and picks a ten year old. They walk back to the ring to burn up even more time because SURE THIS SHOW CAN JUST KEEP GOING.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania XXXIX Night One: They’re Telling Stories

Wrestlemania XXXIX Night One
Date: April 1, 2023
Location: SoFi Stadium, Inglewood, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves
America The Beautiful: Becky G

Dang it feels good to get to write that again. It’s the first night of the show and the card is pretty stacked. This time around, we have the Usos defending the Tag Team Titles against Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens, John Cena challenging Austin Theory for the US Title and Charlotte defending the Smackdown Women’s Title against Rhea Ripley. Let’s get to it.

Becky G. sings America The Beautiful.

The opening video features a voiceover talking about how only one man could host this cold open and that is…..Kevin Hart! He talks about how this is the greatest show in the world and it is taking over Tinseltown. Everyone is going Hollywood tonight, which sends us to some of the Wrestlemania trailers.

The set is designed like the Academy Awards stage and looks GREAT. WWE knows their production stuff and they’re showing it again here.

Here is Wrestlemania Host the Miz with….Snoop Dogg. Miz compares their resumes and says they’re the same person. He declares them both to be champions, with Snoop saying the real champions are the ones in the audience. Miz runs down the card and says it’s time to go, so let’s do that.

US Title: Austin Theory vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging but first we look at Cena’s record setting Make-A-Wish numbers. There are a bunch of Make-A-Wish kids on stage as Cena makes his entrance (with a new GI Joe themed shirt). Cena runs him over with the shoulder to start and powers Theory into the corner without much trouble. Back up and Theory seems to bite Cena’s ear, allowing him to take Cena down for a change.

Cena gets in a few right hands but Theory is back with a rolling Blockbuster for two. A quick STF is broken for Cena and Theory stomps him down as the cockiness continues. Theory slips out of the AA and knocks him into the corner again but Cena comes out swinging. The sleeper cuts him off but Cena powers out and initiates the finishing sequence. The referee gets bumped so there is no one to see Theory tapping out to the STF. A low blow sets up A Town Down to retain the title at 11:18.

Rating: C. This was in the very basic mode but what matters is Theory pinned him in the middle of the ring. That is the only way this should have ended and the cheating doesn’t matter. Cena can lose every match he’s in for the rest of time and still be an all time legend, so the loss means nothing. You can tell Cena has lost a few steps, but he was perfectly fine out there all things considered. It should be a big one for Theory though and that’s what matters.

Braun Strowman/Ricochet vs. Street Profits vs. Viking Raiders vs. Alpha Academy

Titus O’Neil is on commentary and Valhalla is here with the Raiders. Gable ankle locks Ricochet rather quickly to start before Otis comes in to run Ricochet over. Everything breaks down though (Titus approves) and the Vikings clear the ring. Ragnarok plants Ford but the Raiders stop to pose, allowing Strowman to run them both over.

Gable is back in and….somehow he manages rolling Chaos Theory to Strowman. The fans REALLY like that one but Dawkins breaks that up. Ivar drops Dawkins and goes up, only to miss a moonsault. Strowman comes off the top with a splash of his own to Ivar (dang) but a bunch of people make a save.

We get a Tower Of Doom, but this time it’s Otis and Ivar holding up Dawkins and Gable with Ford above THEM, allowing Ricochet to hit a high crossbody to break it up. Now the Strowman Express gets going until Dawkins shoulders him down for a big surprise. Ricochet springboard shooting stars down onto Erik and Dawkins but the shooting star inside hits knees. Ford adds the frog splash to pin Ricochet at 8:23.

Rating: B. This feels like eight people were told to go out there and have fun with one big spot after another. You got to see the talented stars showing off (almost showcasing themselves) and it worked well. There were no stakes and it doesn’t mean anything for now, but this was a lot of fun.

The UpUpDownDown team previews Seth Rollins vs. Logan Paul via video games.

We recap Paul vs. Rollins. Basically Rollins isn’t happy that Paul is getting this much attention without actually being a wrestler. Paul eliminating him from the Royal Rumble and costing him the Elimination Chamber didn’t help either. Since then, Paul has knocked Rollins out a few times (the steel plate in the hand helps), setting up the match.

Logan Paul vs. Seth Rollins

Paul comes down on a zipline (and yes he’d mic’d up) and is accompanied by a dancing bottle of his Prime energy drink. On the other hand, Rollins has a conductor from the Los Angeles Symphony (or something close to it) conducting the crowd as they sing his entrance song. Eh point to Rollins. They circle each other a bit to start with Rollins taking him down without much effort. The Stomp misses but Paul pops back up and sends him outside.

Back in and Rollins sends him into the corner, where Paul snaps Rollins’ throat across the top. The Maverick (Buckshot) Lariat connects and Paul stomps away at the ribs. A standing moonsault gives Paul two and it’s off to an Octopus hold on the mat. With that broken up, Paul jumps from the mat to the top but misses the moonsault, allowing Rollins to throw him over the top.

Three straight suicide dives connect for Rollins and he stomps Paul’s hand on the steps. Back in and they trade rollups for two each before Paul hits the loaded right hand….but he can’t cover because of the stomp. The very delayed cover gets two so Rollins loads up another stomp, only to have the Prime mascot pull Rollins out of the way. It’s…..KSI, Paul’s business partner (and a YouTuber/boxer), which allows Paul to knock him onto the announcers’ table.

The big splash is loaded up but Paul hits KSI as Rollins pulls him in the way. Back in and the Pedigree gets two but the stomp is countered into a fireman’s carry gutbuster (or GTS according to commentary). A frog splash gives Paul two so he tries to go Coast To Coast, only to get superkicked out of the air. The Stomp gives Rollins the pin at 16:11.

Rating: B+. As has been the case, Paul continues to be scary good at this stuff. There were some great near falls in there and Rollins was the right choice to help walk Paul through the match on such a hue stage. Sometimes it’s ok to just let the guys go out there and hit one high spot after another, though they even had the hand injury and Rollins going for the Stomp over and over to tie it together. Paul as a special attraction still works well and it will be great to have him around for the future if he wants to.

We recap Trish Stratus/Lita/Becky Lynch vs. Damage Ctrl. Becky needed some help with the numbers game so Lita showed up for the save. Then they won the titles and Trish Stratus showed up to help as well. Now it’s a six woman tag, with Trish slightly miffed at the suggestion that she is Becky’s backup.

Trish Stratus/Lita/Becky Lynch vs. Damage Ctrl

Trish and company get a comic book themed video and come to the ring in black and white with CGI rain. Well that’s different. The brawl is on before the bell and Becky can’t get the Manhandle Slam. An assisted double neckbreaker drops Becky and Sky hits a running boot in the corner. Becky kicks her way out of trouble but Kai breaks up the tag attempt. The second attempt works though and it’s Lita coming back in to clean house (while looking rather slow and hesitant at times).

A cheap shot puts Damage Ctrl back in, uh, control and the beating is on. Lita suplexes her way out of trouble though and it’s Trish coming in to fire off on Kai in the corner. A neckbreaker gets two on Kai but the Stratusphere is broken up. Instead, Trish sends Kai down onto the other two in a big crash. Back in and Becky’s top rope legdrop sets up the legdrop but the Disarm-Her is broken up.

The Manhandle Slam is broken up and Sky gets in a cheap shot, allowing Bayley to hit the Rose Plant for two, with Lita making the save. Everything breaks down and Stratus hits Kai with Stratusfaction. Becky rolls Bayley up for two and everyone but Sky falls to the floor. Sky moonsaults onto the pile and everyone heads back inside for a slugout. Lita hits the Twist of Fate and Trish hits the Chick Kick, setting up the Litasault. Becky adds a super Manhandle Slam to finish Bayley at 14:37.

Rating: C-. This could have been a lot worse. It wasn’t exactly great but this was more about having Trish and Lita on the big stage again. They are still legends and of course they’re nowhere near what they once were. Neither of them has wrestled a regular schedule and they’re shells of their former selves. The big thing though is they’re still some of the biggest names ever in women’s wrestling and wrestling legends period. Becky got the pin so it isn’t like one of the legends beat a modern star. It wasn’t very good, but it was also far from some disaster.

We recap Rey Mysterio vs. Dominik Mysterio. Rey has tried to be the best father he can to Dominik but wasn’t always there because of wrestling. Eventually Dominik got sick of living in his shadow and joined Judgment Day, who he says is his real family. Then Dominik got arrested for invading Rey’s house on Christmas Eve, earning him a jail sentence of…a few hours. Then earlier this month, Dominik insulted his mom and that was enough to get Rey to FINALLY agree to fight him.

We see Dominik being taken from his cell and being put in the back of a police van…which is then backed into the arena. Dominik, still cuffed and in a lucha mask (looks like Rey’s from Halloween Havoc 1997), is taken to the ring by armed guards. Because of course he does.

Rey Mysterio vs. Dominik Mysterio

Rey on the other hand comes to the ring in a low rider, as driven by Snoop Dogg, complete with the VIVA LA RAZA start to Eddie Guerrero’s theme. After Rey greets Bad Bunny (on Spanish commentary), we’re ready to go. Dominik shoves him around a bit and poses but Rey sends him outside to even things up a bit. Back in and Rey snaps off a running hurricanrana before sending him into the corner for a spanking with a belt.

Dominik rolls outside to throw a drink at his sister Aliyah, drawing her over the barricade. Rey isn’t having that and helps get her back over, allowing Dominik to get in a cheap shot. A Falcon Arrow drops Rey again and Dominik goes outside to yell at his mom. She slaps the heck out of him (oh yeah there’s a reaction) and Rey makes the save, while throwing in a kiss. Dominik gets in a cheap shot back inside as the rest of Judgment Day is here.

Dominik loads up a powerbomb and sends Rey backwards, face first into the buckle (that looked NASTY). Three Amigos are broken up and Rey fights back up but the Judgment Day distraction lets Dominik get in a cheap shot. Cue the LWO (took them long enough) to go after Judgment Day but the distraction lets Dominik hit a 619 into the frog splash for two. With nothing else working, Dominik whips out a chain but Bad Bunny takes it away. The 619 and a frog splash connect to finish Dominik at 14:28.

Rating: A-. This was GREAT and I had a blast with the whole thing. The main thing here is the fans were into it the whole way and carried it so much further. The key to the whole story is that it is something you can relate to. How many parents have had a kid who thought way too much of themselves and ran their mouth to the point where you wanted to (emphasis on those words) smack them? The action was awesome and I wasn’t sure who was winning until the ending, so well done all around. Quite likely Rey’s best Wrestlemania match ever too.

Backlash ad.

We recap Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley. They have met before at Wrestlemania and Charlotte beat her, which has Charlotte believing that she can do it again. This is a different Ripley though and she is ready to prove that she is the best.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is challenging. They hit shoulders to start with Charlotte going down, allowing Rhea to tell her to suck it. Back in and they slug it out, with Ripley knocking her into the corner. Ripley bodyscissors her, followed by a German suplex to cut off the comeback. Charlotte gets in a shot and goes after the knee, as is her custom, but Ripley isn’t having that. Riptide is blocked and they trade big boots to leave them both down.

They slug it out until Charlotte snaps off a fall away slam and goes up top. That takes too long though and Ripley catches her with a release German superplex for two, leaving Ripley stunned. Charlotte goes to the knee again and Natural Selection gets two. They go outside with Charlotte missing a charge into the steps, allowing Ripley to hit a belly to back faceplant for two.

Charlotte rolls some German suplexes but Ripley gets one of her own (with Charlotte almost landing on her head). Charlotte is fine enough to hit a big boot and Ripley is sent outside, where the moonsault connects. The Figure Four is blocked and Charlotte almost runs into the referee, leaving Ripley to hit Riptide for…two (yeah you knew Charlotte would get to kick out of that at least once).

The stunned Ripley gets small packaged for two and the Prism Trap goes on instead. Charlotte makes the ropes and the referee is almost bumped, meaning a spear can give Charlotte two. They slug it out until Charlotte hits another big boot into the Figure Four but Ripley is right next to the ropes. Ripley goes to the apron and they both go up, with Charlotte being dropped face first onto the post. Charlotte is out and the super Riptide gives Ripley the pin and the title at 23:32.

Rating: B+. This started slowly but once they got into the big falls they had me wondering where it was going. While it would have been hard to imagine Ripley losing, there is always that chance with Charlotte in there. What matters is Ripley gets the win that matters and becomes the new star. Charlotte needs to go away from Ripley for a bit (it feels like she hasn’t been on Raw in a long time) and let her be the big deal. For now they, I’ll take Ripley getting the title that she has earned and getting it by pinning Charlotte at Wrestlemania.

Austin Theory brags about his win and asks if you believe in Theory now.

Miz and Snoop Dogg announce the attendance: 80,497. Dogg says the only thing better than those numbers would be if Miz had a match. As it turns out, Miz has put out an open challenge for a Wrestlemania match (even on MySpace) and no one answered. Cue Pat McAfee to say he didn’t see an open challenge but he’s in his Wrestlemania tank top.

Miz says he would love to but just because he is the Wrestlemania host doesn’t mean he can make matches. That’s good for a TINY BALLS chant and McAfee asks who can make a match. Snoop decides he can and the match is on. Miz yells at him but Snoop says “I don’t do this. I rap.” And we’re off.

Miz vs. Pat McAfee

Miz is in street clothes and walks into a spinebuster. McAfee puts him on top and backflips off, allowing Miz to dive into a superkick to send him outside. Miz yells at San Francisco 49 (and wrestling fanatic) George Kittle, who jumps the barricade and clotheslines him, allowing McAfee to flip dive off the pose to take Miz out. Back in and the punt finishes Miz at 3:31.

Rating: C. It was quick, it was funny, they had the celebrity stuff includes and Miz losing is hardly anything new. This was a nice way to give the fans something easy between the Women’s Title match and the main event. Throw in Graves losing his mind over all things McAfee and this was a quick side trip that didn’t hurt anything.

Wrestlemania XL is in Philadelphia.

We recap Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn vs. the Usos. Zayn was at his lowest point just after Wrestlemania last year and needed help. He tried to join the Bloodline and finally got them to say yes, though Jey Uso didn’t trust him. During his attempts to get the team to trust him, Zayn attacked on/off again friend Kevin Owens. Then Roman Reigns changed his mind on Zayn, who turned on Reigns to leave the Bloodline. Jey, who had finally embraced him, walked away as Zayn tried to get Owens on his side. Zayn finally begged enough and got Owens to join him again to fight the Bloodline, including the title match here.

Lil Uzi Vert (a rapper from Philadelphia) performs before the Usos’ entrance and then poses with them.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

Owens and Zayn are challenging and it’s pretty amazing that they have made it here. Zayn starts with Jimmy but let’s make it Jey instead. Jey takes over and sends Zayn outside for a clothesline and posting. Back in and the champs start taking turns on Zayn, who gets to stagger around like he’s barely hanging in there as he does so well. Zayn finally gets away though and hands it off to Owens who comes in and goes nuts.

A Swanton off the top to the floor takes out both Usos and a bullfrog splash gets two back inside. The Swanton only hits Jimmy’s knees though and Jey adds the Superfly Splash for two. Owens pops back up though and kicks Jimmy into the corner for the Cannonball. Zayn brainbusters Jey into the apron and the Swanton gives Owens two on Jimmy in a near fall. Zayn’s Superfly Splash gets two on Jimmy and there’s the Blue Thunder Bomb but Jey comes in off a blue tag.

A jumping superkick hits Zayn for two and even more superkicks get two more, with Owens making the save. Double basement superkicks get two more on Zayn, who won’t give up. Owens breaks up the 1D though and sends Jimmy into the announcers’ table over and over. Jey makes the save though and it’s a double chokeslam to send Owens through the table. Now the 1D connects on Zayn for two and Jey is livid.

Jey unloads on Zayn in the corner and Zayn of course looks like he’s dead on his feet (or incredibly drunk), with a Helluva Kick from Jey making it worse. The trash talk is on but Zayn hits an exploder into the corner. Owens is back up for the tag and it’s a Helluva Kick to Jimmy and a Stunner to Jey….for two in a heck of a false finish (they got me there). They both stand up (Owens: “LET’S END IT”!) and it’s time for the barrage of superkicks.

Owens gets dropped and Zayn is kicked on the floor, setting up the double Superfly Splash for the very near fall. More superkicks drop Owens but he reverses a superplex into the swinging superplex, allowing the big tag to Zayn. The Helluva Kick in the corner hits Jey and, after Zayn whispers something to him, another Helluva Kick knocks him silly. Owens Stuns Jimmy and the third Helluva Kick finishes Jey and ends the title reign at 24:07.

Rating: A-. This was all about the moment and it was a smash hit. They had set this story up months ago and now they got the chance to pay the whole thing off. The last few minutes were the kind of situation where you could feel the big moment coming but they made you wait for it anyway. It was a heck of a match (cut out the superkick spamming and it’s even better) and the best way to close out a pretty awesome night.

Owens and Zayn celebrate in an emotional moment.

The big highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a heck of a show with only a little bit that wasn’t very good or better. Wrestling aside though, this was built around one important thing: stories that had been set up months in advance and are being paid off. Theory vs. Cena, Rey vs. Dominik, Ripley vs. Charlotte and the main event were all set up a good while ago and we got to see how it went to get us to the payoffs. That made them all the sweeter and it was a much more emotional moment as a result.

As for the show itself, you had a series of strong matches, with Rey vs. Dominik, the Women’s Title and the main event all being awesome, plus a very good showcase match. The six woman tag wasn’t very good and the opener was just ok, but the rest of the show worked well. I had a blast with this show and it felt special, which is the point of Wrestlemania. Nicely done and Night Two has its work cut out.

Results
Austin Theory b. John Cena – A Town Down
Street Profits b. Braun Strowman/Ricochet, Alpha Academy and Viking Raiders – Frog splash to Ricochet
Seth Rollins b. Logan Paul – Stomp
Trish Stratus/Lita/Becky Lynch b. Damage Ctrl – Super Manhandle Slam to Bayley
Rey Mysterio b. Dominik Mysterio – Frog splash
Rhea Ripley b. Charlotte – Super Riptide
Pat McAfee b. Miz – Punt
Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens b. Usos – Helluva Kick to Jey

 

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Wrestlemania XXXIX Night One Preview

We’re here. It’s finally Wrestlemania Weekend and that means it is time to get ready for the biggest event of the year. As has been the case in recent years, the show will be held over two nights, which might work a little better this year. We know the matches assigned to both nights so now we can have a better idea of what to expect. Both nights have their strengths so we’ll start with Saturday. Let’s get to it.

US Title: Austin Theory(c) vs. John Cena

This is how the show is starting so they’re going with one of the bigger names first. These two have been bickering on and off for months and it might be the time for Theory to take his step to the next level. Cena verbally destroyed Theory a few weeks back and after that massacre, Theory almost has to win. I’m not sure how (or if) they get there, but it is what needs to be done.

I’ve had both winners written out and can’t make up my mind. As much sense as it makes for Theory to win, I could absolutely see Cena winning here for the feel good moment and then dropping the title again at Backlash or even this week. Every instinct I have says Cena but I’ll go with Theory, as my instincts seem to be wrong. Theory retains, but it absolutely would not surprise me to see Cena get the title.

Rey Mysterio vs. Dominik Mysterio

This is the personal match of the night and that should make for a nice showdown. In short, people are wanting to see Rey shut up his loudmouthed son who has run his mouth for months now. They have played the long game with this one and that makes the match feel so much better. I want to see Rey win on the big stage, but there’s one problem with that.

I’ll take Dominik winning here, as he isn’t pushing 50 and isn’t an active Hall of Famer. It makes far more sense for Dominik to win and in this case that is the right thing to do. Dominik has spent months (if not years) trying to forge his own identity and now he almost has one. Having Rey beat him would take away so much of what he has built up. Dominik cheats to win (with the required Eddie Guerrero reference) and brags about it forever, or at least until a likely rematch.

Braun Strowman/Ricochet vs. Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy vs. Viking Raiders

This is one of the weirder ideas that WWE has had in a long time as we have a men’s (and a women’s on Sunday) four way tag team match for the sake of getting people on the card. It’s a situation where putting something on the line would make a lot of sense but instead, this is just for bragging rights. Maybe they’ll throw a title shot out there at the last minute, but for now we just have a match.

I’ll go with the Strowman and Ricochet to win, as there is a tendency for the newer teams to get surprise wins. The Academy is busy with the Maximum Male Models stuff and the Raiders would make weird winners. Strowman and Ricochet are fresher than the Profits, who seem like they are heading for singles runs anyway. The lack of stakes make this one all the stranger though, as with nothing to fight for, anyone could win it.

Seth Rollins vs. Logan Paul

Now this is one of the interesting ones as I could see them going either way again. I don’t think it’s any secret that Paul has been a complete stunner of talent and skill, but one of the key things is that he has only beaten the Miz in a singles match. There is a difference between beating a glorified goof like Miz and pinning one of the biggest stars in WWE at Wrestlemania. I’m not saying it won’t happen, but that is a big step to take.

It’s another coin flip but I’ll take Rollins, who very well could be slotted int the World Title scene shortly after Wrestlemania. The thing about Paul is his celebrity status alone means he doesn’t need to win something like this so going with Paul winning would be a little weird. It’s something that could happen, but I’ll take Rollins to win here, as he should….I think.

Trish Stratus/Lita/Becky Lynch vs. Damage Ctrl

This is your legends match of the show but int his case one of the legends is a reigning champion. The real question is what becomes of the titles shortly after this, as there is a good chance that they are going to change hands before things get much further. Before we get there though, there is a six woman tag to deal with and it might determine where things go from here.

I’ll actually take Damage Ctrl to win here, possibly with the ending helping to set up wherever we are going next with the legends. That opens up more than a few doors, many of which could be rather interesting. What matters is that Damage Ctrl gets back on the winning side and they could do that here by beating the legends and Lynch, who will probably be having the bigger story going forward anyway.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte(c) vs. Rhea Ripley

There are two options for the Night One main event and this is the singles version. The idea here is that Charlotte is living in the past and thinking that she is facing the same Ripley that she beat three years ago while Ripley knows that she is a different person. Ripley has come a long, long way in the last several months and it is certainly going to be something else coming after Charlotte.

While there is always the “it’s Charlotte” principle, this has to be Ripley winning the title and there is no way around it. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to like Charlotte but she is being presented as more of the hero in this whole thing. Ripley is on fire right now and needs the win or the gap between Charlotte and almost everyone else will get even wider than it already is. Go with the logical move here and pick Ripley.

Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

Then you have this match which should headline the show. At the end of the day, the Bloodline has been the biggest thing in WWE over the last few years and with the team in more danger than they have been before, it would make sense to put this on last. Otherwise, I would feel sorry for Charlotte and Ripley, who would be left out there to get ignored by the fans.

As much as it seems like this should be a layup, WWE has made me wonder if Owens and Zayn will win the titles. I’ll go with new champions, but it is the kind of choice that will probably be wrong. The Bloodline has to lose at some point and this would be a good place to start. The rest of the story can take pace the following night, but for now the Usos need to go down to the Canadian Connection.

Overall Thoughts

I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for Wrestlemania. This year’s card looks great and the first night has a lot of the good stuff. There is a lot to get out of this card and I’d like to see how well the new regime actually runs the biggest event of the year. If nothing else, all of the pieces are there and now they need to actually make all of it work after all of the work they have put in.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXVI: As Only Shawn Should Go Out

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

In addition to the two main events, there’s a third big match that people never thought would actually happen. Back on January 4, 2010, Bret Hart returned to the company for the first time in over twelve years. After burying the hatchet with Shawn Michaels, there was only one score left to settle: Vince McMahon. Therefore, it’s Bret vs. Vince, naturally in a no holds barred match. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Barretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Gaspard and JTG are Cryme Tyme, Tatsu is a talented Japanese wrestler who didn’t go anywhere, Slam Master J. is Jesse in a bad rap gimmick, Kozlov is a Russian mixed martial arts fighter, Gallows is a big power guy, Reks is a surfer, Archer is another big power guy, Croft and Barretta are a team called the Dudebusters and Hart-Smith is Kidd’s partner in the Hart Dynasty. The NXT rookies (from back when NXT was a competition) are watching from the stage.

Primo and J. are sent out in the first thirty seconds but the ring is still really full. Henry puts out the Dudebusters and Chavo, only to get dumped by Khali. As you might expect, a bunch of people get together to put Khali out as well. Cryme Tyme gets together to put out Gallows but Shad eliminates JTG. Things settle down for a change but there are still too many people in there.

Ryder and Funaki save themselves from elimination. Masters catches Finlay in the Masterlock, only to get kicked in the face to put Chris out. Kozlov gets rid of the Hart Dynasty but Knox gets rid of Kozlov. Funaki and Goldust are out next with Regal putting Gaspard out a few seconds later. Finlay dumps Regal and Ryder eliminates Reks. We’re down to Santino, Tatsu, Yang, Ryder, Finlay, Archer, Carlito and Knox. The fans get behind Santino and he brings out the Cobra to clean house, only to get dumped by Finlay, making him the most hated man in the stadium.

Yang fires off some nice kicks to Archer but he’s quickly eliminated, as is Archer via a kick from Tatsu. To show how annoying Striker can get with nicknames, he calls Tatsu “the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim.” Uh, sure. Hornswoggle makes his annual appearance to throw Finlay the shillelagh. Knox gets knocked out and there’s a tadpole splash, followed by Carlito being tossed. Ryder dumps Knox and Finlay from behind but Ryder goes after Hornswoggle, allowing Tatsu to kick him out for the win at 8:34.

Rating: D+. This would be the traditional not great battle royal but it was cool to see someone young getting a win for a change. You could see a lot of new names showing up around the company, though a lot of them really never went anywhere. Unfortunately that would include Tatsu, who never went much higher than this, partially due to ECW not being around to take away some of the roster spots.

We open with another fly over.

Fantasia (from American Idol) sings America the Beautiful.

The set is a big pyramid made of Titantron screens. It’s another cool idea.

The opening video talks about how many people spent their lives reaching this night but now the page turns. For some it’s a new story and for some it’s the end. Tonight is their chance to earn their moment, which would become the most important thing Wrestlemania offered in years to come.

There’s a really cool miniature cylinder that lowers from the ceiling before every match with the Titantron video playing.

Tag Team Titles: R-Truth/John Morrison vs. The Miz/Big Show

R-Truth is a rapper still around today and is challenging along with Morrison. Miz is US Champion and there are still four Tag Team Title belts a year after the titles were unified. The champs have their themes put together and it really doesn’t work. Miz and Morrison get things going with John scoring off a slam before it’s off to Truth.

That’s about it for the good times though as Show comes in and throws Truth across the ring. Morrison gets knocked off the apron but he’s still able to kick Show off the middle rope to save Truth. Back to Miz vs. Morrison as Truth stupidly dives at Show, earning himself a ram into the post. Morrison rolls out of the Skull Crushing Finale and into a nice rollup for two, only to have Show knock him cold to retain at 3:26.

Rating: D. Well they made good time. I’m not sure why they got out of there so fast but maybe the rest of the show was running long. It’s not like this was missing much by turning it into a Raw match so it’s acceptable. The tag division was getting stagnant again but at least Miz was flying up the charts.

Video on Wrestlemania week in Phoenix.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

These three were part of a group called Legacy but the young guys (Ted Jr. and Cody if that’s not clear) rebelled, basically turning Randy face again in the process. This is officially a triple threat but it starts as a glorified handicap match. Rhodes gets clotheslined to the floor so Orton can stomp Ted down. The numbers quickly catch up with him though and the double stomping begins to some INSANE booing.

They take turns holding Orton so the other can get in some right hands, followed by a double suplex. A DiBiase clothesline stops Orton’s comeback but as is the case in almost every triple threat match ever, the two who work together get in a fight over who gets the pin. They fight to the floor and the crowd is suddenly much more silent. Striker: “Perhaps a future Wrestlemania main event right here.”

Orton makes his comeback and Rhodes takes out DiBiase by mistake. Striker says that’s Wrestlemania experience. Most people would call it wrestling experience in general but Striker is the professional. The double elevated DDT, which Cole has never seen before (certainly not at Wrestlemania), takes Rhodes and DiBiase down. The Punt knocks Rhodes out and the RKO ends DiBiase at 9:01.

Rating: C. So much for Rhodes and DiBiase. Cody would be fine but DiBiase never did anything in WWE after this (to be fair he hadn’t done much in the first place). Orton was on fire again as his style and finisher are way too easy to cheer, yet for some reason WWE insists on making him a heel, even though the crowd is almost always going to turn him back.

Vickie Guerrero and her fellow heel divas promise to win their ten Divas tag. Jillian Hall (now a horrible singer, which may have been designed to make fun of Brooke Hogan) comes in to sing Simply the Best. All of the other women leave so here’s Santino for a Slim Jim commercial. He takes a bite and Jillian becomes Mae Young. Another bite turns her into Gene Okerlund (in the same dress) and a third turns Okerlund into Melina. No more biting as Santino leaves with another good looking woman.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Money in the Bank with TEN ENTRANTS. Thankfully they would split it up next year where they went with two eight man versions. Bourne is a high flier, Swagger is a really good amateur wrestler, Ziggler has gone from nothing to a solid midcarder, McIntyre is an arrogant young Scottish wrestler and the Intercontinental Champion and Kane has a black eye for reasons that aren’t explained.

Standard wild brawl to start with MVP throwing in a ladder but Drew intercepts it and climbs until Matt makes the save. Seven guys all try to climb the same ladder to predictable results. Bourne gets chokeslammed over the top and down onto a bunch of people. Kofi knocks the ladder over to send Drew and Matt into the top rope. Now it’s Christian going up but Ziggler runs up and pulls him down, which is called a Zig Zag. That’s quite the stretch.

MVP knocks Kane to the floor but walks into Pay Dirt (jumping downward spiral) from Shelton. Swagger uses the top of the ladder to stop some climbs until Bourne drops him as well. Christian and Matt bring in ladders and slide them into the rings of the one standing, creating two platforms and crushing Swagger in the middle in the process. They climb up onto the platforms while Bourne is on the side of the ladder and this isn’t ending well.

Swagger shoves Matt’s ladder away and Bourne breaks up a Killswitch onto the platform by knocking Christian face first into the ladder. Instead of going for the case, Evan hits Air Bourne (shooting star) and then tries to go up, allowing Matt to hiptoss him to the mat in a huge crash. Swagger shoves Matt onto the bridged ladder but gets pulled down by MVP. Shelton and MVP fight to the floor where Kane takes them both out with a ladder.

Back in and Kane shoves the ladder over to drop Ziggler before throwing the ladder away. He’s not done though as Ziggler gets chokeslammed onto another ladder and then crushed inside of it. Kane crushes him so much that he breaks the ladder in two. Kofi is back in with Trouble in Paradise but now he has no ladder (because getting another of the more than half dozen on the floor is out of the question) so he gets an idea.

Kingston picks up both halves of the ladder and uses them as stilts, only to have McIntyre break it up because the stilts idea, while VERY creative, is also kind of stupid. Matt stops Drew’s attempt by crotching him on the top rope but Christian goes up to slow Hardy. They both have to knock Kane off, followed by a reverse DDT from Christian to put them both down. Christian goes back up but Swagger knocks him down and pulls down the briefcase (taking his sweet time to do so) for the win at 13:44.

Rating: C+. This is the weakest of the Money in the Banks that they’ve had yet and again it’s due to having so many people. In the last five minutes of this match, several people just disappeared while everyone else did their thing. If you’re not going to do anything with most of the people, stop having them in the match and put them in a match somewhere else on the card.

Swagger would become one of the weaker World Champions of all time, which is a big reason why he’s in the spot he’s in five years later. Instead of being a solid midcarder, he’s that guy who used to be World Champion and has fallen this far. It’s a major problem with something like Money in the Bank: instead of building someone else up, someone jumps to the title scene but doesn’t have any roots to support them. It happened with Swagger and it would happen again later.

Extreme Rules ad.

Hall of Fame, with Ted DiBiase headlining. He called this one of the few moments you can’t put a price on and made $100 bills fall from the ceiling, even though that’s not something he would have done in his day.

The Class of 2010 includes Stu Hart (represented by most of his kids), Wendi Richter, Mad Dog Vachon (in a wheelchair), Antonio Inoki, Bob Uecker (he deserves it), Gorgeous George (represented by his wife) and Ted DiBiase. It’s a bit of a smaller class this year which is something they need to address in the future. Something they don’t need to address is the awesome music that plays for this every year. It’s really good stuff.

We recap Sheamus vs. HHH. Sheamus won the Raw World Title in December 2009 in a huge upset but then lost it at No Way Put 2010 when HHH eliminated him in the Elimination Chamber for his first loss (assuming you ignore ECW). Sheamus wanted to fight HHH one on one at Wrestlemania to prove that the pin in the Chamber was a fluke. HHH compared Sheamus to himself back in 1996 when he tried to fight Ultimate Warrior and got crushed (you almost never hear about that anymore). It’s a simple story here but one that has worked for years.

Sheamus vs. HHH

They circle each other to start and HHH slaps him in the face. An early Pedigree attempt doesn’t work so it’s a suplex and knee drop for two instead. Sheamus’ attempt to bail outside doesn’t work as HHH drags him back in for a Figure Four because we haven’t praised Flair recently enough. Sheamus grabs the ropes and takes it outside for a whip into the steps as Striker tries to dub HHH the Ace of Spades.

Two straight Irish Curse backbreakers put HHH down as the match slows a lot. An ax handle gets two and some simple right hands to the face get the same. We hit the chinlock because this is the point in a WWE style match where you would put on a chinlock. After a powerslam, Sheamus grabs an armbar. Dude come on. HHH fights up out of the devastating armbar (because nothing else had been done to his arm) and grabs a DDT.

The high knee and facebuster get two but Sheamus counters the Pedigree into the Brogue Kick for two (of course HHH gets to be one of if not the first person to kick out of it). After the spinebuster sends Sheamus to the apron, another Brogue Kick drops HHH. No cover though as HHH pops up and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C+. Good power match here, assuming you ignore HHH kicking out of one of Sheamus’ finishers (to be fair it wasn’t his big finisher yet, as a Razor’s Edge called the High Cross was still his go to move) and get the pin that he didn’t need. Sheamus would win the rematch at Extreme Rules 2010 in the standard formula: HHH wins the big match on the big stage but loses the rematch as a consolation prize.

We recap Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk. Mysterio had cost Punk a spot in Money in the Bank so Punk and his Straight Edge Society (a stable led by Punk as a near religious figure who would save them from their lives of addiction by the powers of a straight edge lifestyle) went after Rey, including interrupting Rey bringing his daughter into the ring on her birthday. Rey wouldn’t fight with his family there so Punk branded him a coward. The match was set for Wrestlemania and if Rey loses, he has to join the Straight Edge Society.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has Luke Gallows and Serena (a talented wrestler who rarely got in the ring in WWE) with him. Before the match, Punk accuses the 70,000+ people here of being on drugs or alcohol, thinking it would make all of their problems go away. After tonight’s win, Punk will see all these people join him as one nation under Punk with sobriety for all. This year Rey is dressed as one of the aliens from Avatar which didn’t work all that well as it looked like his normal attire outside of the piece of black hair on the back of his mask.

Punk (with G.I. Joe themed trunks) jumps him from behind to start as Striker says Punk’s mind is a vile pigsty. Rey gets caught in the Tree of Woe but pulls himself up to avoid a baseball slide, sending Punk up against the post. That’s not enough to slow Punk down though as he drops Rey face first onto the steps and puts on a chinlock. Rey gets up but his springboard cross body is caught in a belly to belly for two.

Punk holds him down with a test of strength grip until Rey fights up and springboards to the top for a moonsault into a DDT (that looked way better than I was expecting). Another moonsault is caught in the GTS (Go To Sleep) but Rey grabs the rope to save himself. Rey kicks him down and tries a frog splash but Punk sits up just in time. Back up and Serena saves Punk from a 619, only to have it connect a few seconds later, setting up the springboard splash for the pin at 6:30.

Rating: C. This could have been good with some more time but there’s only so much you can do for a big match in less than seven minutes. The Straight Edge Society was a cool concept and had a lot of potential but they lost almost every important match they had, which ultimately led to the stable falling apart.

We recap Bret vs. Vince. As mentioned earlier, Bret returned on the January 4, 2010 Monday Night Raw and seemed to make peace with Vince, only to have Vince kick him low. Eventually Bret broke his leg in a car wreck backstage which was finally enough for Vince to sign for the match. Bret agreed to wrestle with the injury after being called a coward. Vince signed the contract and gloated, but as he turned around, Bret’s cast was on the table and his leg was just fine. You would think seeing Bret goldbricking for years would have taught Vince something but no one ever seemed to get the idea.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Anything goes. For reasons that I’ll never understand, they remixed Bret’s music for his return. Bret is in jean shorts here because this is going to be a fight instead of a match. Before the match, Vince says Bret deserves a Wrestlemania sized screwing. Therefore, he’s paid to have the Hart Family at ringside (well at least the ones that will talk to him) as lumberjacks and Bret’s brother Bruce (in sunglasses of course) is going to be guest referee.

We’re still not ready to go though because Bret says that the Harts were on to Vince in the first place and it’s Vince that is going to get screwed. Bret slugs him out to the floor to start and the Hart Dynasty gives him a Hart Attack off the top. Back in and Bret starts in on the knee, sending Vince bailing to the floor. He can’t quite get underneath the ring but does find a crowbar.

Bret punches it out of his hand though and beats on him for a bit, followed by stomping away at the “lower abdomen”. Someone throws Bret a chair so he can have a seat for a bit. Bret beats on him with the chair for a good while and Vince appears to be in shock. The Sharpshooter finally makes Vince tap at 11:09.

Rating: A. This was all it needed to be and exactly what people were expecting. Neither guy is a wrestler anymore so having the Hart Family, especially Kidd and Hart-Smith, helped a good bit. There was never any doubt as to what this was going to be and while it went a bit longer than it needed to, it did everything it needed to.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Atlanta. Cole promises a great guest host.

The attendance is 72,219, again not announced as a record.

We recap Edge vs. Chris Jericho. They had been the Tag Team Champions in June 2009 but Edge had destroyed his Achilles and put him on the shelf for a very long time. He returned early at the 2010 Royal Rumble to win in a major surprise. Edge immediately chose to challenge Jericho for the Smackdown World Title because they suddenly hated each other, even though there wasn’t a very strong reason for them to. Edge threatened to spear Jericho over and over again which was really the only thing he said during the buildup.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Jericho is defending and shoulders Edge down to start before Edge charges into a boot in the corner. The early threat of a spear sends Jericho bailing to the floor but he avoids a baseball slide and hits one of his own to put Edge on the floor. Striker name drops Sexton Hardcastle (Edge’s pre-WWE name) as Jericho puts on a chinlock. Back up and gets draped over the top rope, only to knock Jericho off the apron and into the announcers’ table.

That goes nowhere so Jericho rolls through a high cross body for two. They’re really not burning the place up out there. The Walls and Codebreaker are both blocked but the spear is countered into the Walls for our first big spot. Edge rolls out of that as well and gets two off a small package. The Lionsault misses and the Edge-O-Matic gets two more. Jericho walks into the Impaler for the same but Edge is winded.

With Edge in trouble, Jericho loads up a spear of his own (Striker: “WHAT A GENIUS MOVE!”) only to charge into a boot to the face. Edge tries his own spear but runs into a one knee Codebreaker for two. Jericho starts in on the ankle before putting on the Walls. He gets smarter though and goes with a single leg crab which really cranks on the ankle. Edge gets to the ropes because it’s just a half crab so Jericho goes to get the belt. As you would expect, the referee is bumped a few seconds later and the belt shot gets two on Edge. The Codebreaker connects for the clean(ish) pin to retain the title at 15:48.

Rating: B-. This took some time but was really getting going near the end. Again though, it feels like it got cut off short and that’s getting annoying tonight. At least it worked while it lasted, especially for one of Edge’s first major matches back. This is still a weird feud but since it’s WWE, you know this isn’t ending with one match.

Post match Edge goes after Jericho again and throws him on the announcers’ table. A big run down the tables sets up a spear to drive Jericho through the barricade and set up a rematch. That would have worked a lot better if the pin had come off the belt shot instead of the Codebreaker.

We look at the pre-show battle royal because the matches haven’t been cut short enough already.

Maryse/Michelle McCool/Alicia Fox/Layla/Vickie Guerrero vs. Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix/Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Michelle is Women’s Champion and Maryse is Divas Champion. All of the villains save for Vickie bail to start, leaving her to face Beth. Vickie gets beaten up in the corner to start but Michelle makes the save with a Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) to Kelly. Everyone comes in and it’s time for a parade of finishers until it’s only Beth left standing against Vickie. Michelle saves the praying Guerrero and lays out Beth. Kelly is still down so Vickie goes up top (again with help from Michelle and Layla) for a “hog splash” and the pin at 3:26.

Rating: D. Well at least it was quick. The Divas were in a weird place here as they were trying to find a new top name but everyone was kind of getting lost in the shuffle. Laycool (Layla and Michelle) were trying but they needed some top stars. Kelly eventually became the main star, even though she was just a model who could only kind of work a match. Anyway, this was a nothing match that was only there for the Vickie stuff, which was another problem around this time.

We recap Batista vs. John Cena. Batista had helped the McMahons out of a few jams so he was granted a title shot at Cena’s Raw World Title right after Cena had won the title in the Elimination Chamber. This turned into a feud over who was the bigger star in the last five years because Batista thought he should be the face of the company. Batista had won their first major showdown at Summerslam 2008 but Cena said he was here because he loves it instead of for the money like Batista did.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and you can feel how big this really is. Cena is introduced by the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with Cena but that’s the standard anymore. They do the big power lockup to start and Cena actually takes him down with a headlock. That goes nowhere so Batista fights up and hits a clothesline to the back of the head to take over.

Batista gets into his gloating power offense but Cena grabs a quick suplex to get a breather. An early AA attempt is countered into a DDT for two and now Batista gets his real advantage. We hit the chinlock with a body scissors (Striker: “Look at this potential submission hold!” Just stop. Please.) but Cena fights up and wins a slugout, only to get caught in a neckbreaker. Now we get the real Cena comeback with all his usual stuff, including the STF which sends Batista crawling to the ropes. A quick spear gets two for the champ and both guys are down.

They head to the top for a test of strength on the ropes (that’s a new one) until Cena headbutts him to the mat. A top rope Shuffle looks to set up the AA but Batista counters into the Batista Bomb for two. Another AA attempt is countered into a reverse suplex but Cena counters into a tilt-a-whirl slam, only to muscle Batista up into an AA for a really close near fall. Cena goes up top again for the Fameasser but dives into a spinebuster (Striker: “That’s how he broke his neck the last time!” No it wasn’t Striker.). Another Batista Bomb is countered into the STF and Batista taps at 13:30 to make Cena a nine time World Champion.

Rating: B+. That’s the only kind of match these two needed to have as they’re just beating the heck out of each other the whole way with big move after big move. It’s also a big stadium style match which almost always makes for a really good atmosphere. Much like the build, I’m not sure what else there is to say here. It’s Cena vs. Batista at Wrestlemania. You really don’t need any more of an explanation.

We recap the main event, which all stems from last year. Shawn’s loss has eaten at him for a year now and he has to beat Undertaker to exercise his demons once and for all. Undertaker wouldn’t fight him again so Shawn cost him the World Title at No Way Out 2010. That was enough for the match to be made but Undertaker wanted Shawn’s career on the line. Shawn agreed because if he can’t beat Undertaker, he doesn’t want to wrestle anymore.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ and no countout. Shawn just walks down but Undertaker makes his big entrance by rising up through the stage. Shawn breaks up the staredown with a throat slit of his own so Undertaker pounds on him in the corner early. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up Old School but Undertaker might have tweaked his knee. Shawn goes right after the knee to break up a chokeslam and starts in on the arm for some reason. Striker: “Shawn Michaels is very adept at submission grappling.” For the love of all things good and holy will someone SHUT HIM UP???

The threat of Sweet Chin Music sends Undertaker up against the ropes and it’s back to the knee. Undertaker knocks him to the floor and teases the Taker Dive but Shawn charges back in and grabs the leg. A reverse Figure Four doesn’t work and Shawn is sent into the post to keep Undertaker in control. The apron legdrop is a pretty stupid move and Shawn slaps on the Figure Four.

Undertaker does the sit up and turns it over so Shawn immediately breaks. At least he’s smart enough to let go as so many other people just let it stay on forever. Since Shawn let go so fast, his knee is good enough for the forearm and nipup, only to walk into a chokeslam for two. The Tombstone doesn’t work as Shawn crawls down Undertaker’s body and grabs an ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker gets Shawn on his back and kicks him in the face to break it up (Shawn’s stunned look is great). The big man heads outside but has to catch Shawn’s springboard cross body, countering it into a Tombstone on the floor. Somehow that only gets two so it’s a Last Ride but Shawn counters with an X Factor/Undertaker’s leg gives out (some combination of both) to give Michaels two. The top rope elbow hits knees and thankfully Undertaker’s knees are more banged up than Shawn.

Hell’s Gate goes on out of nowhere but Shawn counters into a rollup for two in an awesome reversal. Sweet Chin Music is good for two more. Another superkick is blocked and now the Last Ride connects for a big near fall. Striker: “We’ve auditioned our entire lives for this moment!” It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but the Last Ride is escaped and Undertaker takes Sweet Chin Music onto the table. Shawn’s moonsault onto the table only hits Undertaker’s legs and both guys are done.

Back in and Shawn hits Sweet Chin Music as well as he can but Undertaker kicks out again. Yet another attempt at the superkick is countered into a chokeslam. Undertaker’s knee won’t let him cover so it’s a Tombstone for two, even with Undertaker’s tongue sticking out. There go the straps and Undertaker tells Shawn to stay down. Shawn is on his knees and does another throat slit, admitting that he just can’t do it. Undertaker doesn’t move so Shawn slaps him in the face, triggering a jumping Tombstone to end Shawn’s career at 24:01.

Rating: A. It’s not an A+ because it’s just a hair beneath last year but sweet goodness this is amazing. The leg work made for a good story and the symbolism of the second throat slit was perfect. Shawn going out at Wrestlemania really was the only way to go about it and this was the kind of match he deserved to go out on. Outstanding stuff from one of the best big match performers ever.

That isn’t to take away from Undertaker though, who continues to take this Streak and his career to places that never seemed possible before. Ever since that Batista match it’s been classic after classic in an amazing career resurgence. Undertaker ending Shawn’s career was great and the jumping Tombstone made it even better. This was more than just trading finishers as the story told of Undertaker trying to hang on and Shawn fighting for everything he had and just not being good enough. This was great stuff and another classic.

Undertaker poses and helps Shawn up. Shawn soaks in all the cheers and takes his time going up the aisle, shaking a lot of hands. Shawn: “I’m going to drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” After applauding the fans, Shawn walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a heck of a show with the double main event taking up the last fourth of the show. There’s nothing too terrible on here save for the opener and Divas match which combined to be less than seven minutes in the ring. Some of the stuff in the middle isn’t great but it’s certainly good enough to get by. This was another really good show as Wrestlemania is on a hot streak. Well save for XXV of course.

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo:

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

2013 Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/04/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvi-goodbye-mr-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – March 6, 2023: Moving Night

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 6, 2023
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Corey Graves

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and tonight is going to be one of the bigger shows, as John Cena is back. There is a good chance that we get his Wrestlemania match set up this week, as he is running out of time. Other than that, we also get a face to face staredown between Logan Paul and Seth Rollins. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The Bloodline (Paul Heyman, Jimmy Uso and Solo Sikoa) arrived earlier today, with Heyman reiterating Roman Reigns’ orders to deal with Sami Zayn. Now Zayn escaped on Friday, so he must be here in Boston tonight. Instead, Sikoa is going to solve the Kevin Owens problem tonight, and Jimmy will solve Zayn, whether Jey is here or not. Jimmy and Solo leave and Heyman calls Reigns.

Kevin Owens vs. Solo Sikoa

Owens jumps him before the bell but Sikoa fights back and we officially get going. Sikoa kicks away at him a few times and a right hand gets two. Owens slugs away but gets taken down with a shot to the stomach. Some standing clotheslines put Sikoa down and there’s the backsplash for a bonus. The Cannonball is loaded up but Sikoa bails to the floor, allowing Owens to take him down with a dive.

Cue Jimmy Uso for the save and Sikoa slams Owens off the top. It’s too early for the running Umaga attack so Sikoa hits it against the barricade as we take a break. Back with Sikoa hitting a Samoan drop as Jimmy is looking all over the building, presumably for Jey. Sikoa goes shoulder first into the post and Jimmy’s distraction fails, allowing Owens to hit the Cannonball. The Swanton connects on Sikoa but Jimmy comes in for the DQ at 11:20.

Rating: C. This was ok, with even commentary saying it wasn’t about the win or loss but rather the Bloodline hurting Owens. That does make sense in this case, as the Bloodline has long since been all about taking care of Owens’ enemies. The Zayn reunion is still coming for Owens, and this is the reason why he would need him. It’s another step in a long path, but the payoff is going to be huge.

Post match the beatdown is on with the splash through the announcers’ table loaded up. Cue Sami Zayn for the save and he chases the villains off with a chair. Sami leans down to help Owens up but Owens rolls away and leaves on his own. The long form teases continue.

Bobby Lashley wants Bray Wyatt to face him like a man.

Carmella is sick of Adam Pearce and Chelsea Green comes up to applaud her. They want the Wrestlemania match changed and are going to go to Pearce’s manager after tonight. They’re rather pleased and then throw Byron Saxton out for eavesdropping.

Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Non-title and Chelsea Green is here with Carmella. A few early shots have Belair in trouble but she sends Carmella into the corner and pops back up. Carmella knocks her off the corner though and we take a break. Back with Belair fighting back but Green distracts the referee to avoid the count. Carmella hits a quick superkick for two and isn’t happy with the kickout. Belair rains down right hands in the corner but Green offers another distraction. This time Green is sent over the barricade and the KOD finishes for Belair at 8:35.

Rating: C-. These two feel like they have fought a few dozen times and I don’t remember any significantly different result. WWE tries to make Carmella feel like a big deal but just being a former multiple time champion doesn’t mean you feel like a threat to Belair here. This was little more than a workout for Belair, which is what she needs on her way to Asuka.

Post match the beatdown is on again and Asuka makes the save.

Sami Zayn comes up to Kevin Owens and says tonight was proof that the Bloodline is too big for any one person. They need to go after them together but Owens remembers Zayn joining the team right here in this very arena. Sure they could fight them together, but Owens doesn’t want to. Zayn should just rejoin Roman Reigns and get the acceptance he wants. Just leave Owens out of it.

Video on Rhea Ripley.

Here is the Miz to moderate a meeting between Seth Rollins and Logan Paul. The fans sing Rollins’ song for so long that Paul tells them to shut up before the segment runs out of time. Rollins sucks up to Boston and mocks the idea of Paul gracing us with his presence. Paul talks about how he is just better than Rollins at his job and he has done more in a year and a half than Rollins has done in twenty. If Paul was Rollins, he wouldn’t like him either.

Rollins calls Paul the scum of the earth and a troll, plus a fraud. Rollins and the fans don’t want him in their house but Boston is here to see Rollins get his pound of flesh. The fight is teased but Miz says not so fast. Miz isn’t going to let any violence go down tonight, but Paul says don’t put words in his mouth. Paul isn’t going to fight here in Boston, but he might if the stage is bigger.

Miz brings up that he is the host of Wrestlemania and can make the match happen, which has Rollins very interested. He even throws Miz out so he can get there faster. Paul jumps Rollins from behind but misses the Stomp, only to drop him with one heck of a right hand. Paul says that when Rollins wakes up, he can tell him about Wrestlemania. Imagine that: Paul is an outstanding heel when he is given the chance to be one. This was more great stuff from Paul, who is getting to be his natural self for a change.

We recap Brock Lesnar agreeing to face Omos at Wrestlemania.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Omos

This is thanks to Mustafa Ali getting the match made. Ziggler gets in a shot but charges into a big boot. The chokebomb finishes Ziggler at 52 seconds.

The Maximum Male Models are amazed by someone. Baron Corbin comes up to say thank you, but they mean Otis. Corbin: “What does he have that I don’t have?” Mansoor: “Hair.” Maxxine Dupri tells Corbin to beat Chad Gable and maybe she’ll take him on as a client.

Paul Heyman tells Jimmy Uso to deal with Sami Zayn, but he better make sure Jey Uso is on Smackdown.

Finn Balor vs. Johnny Gargano

The rest of the Judgment Day and Dexter Lumis are here. Balor works on an armbar to start but Gargano sends him outside. The suicide dive drops Balor and we take an early break. Back with Gargano fighting back and hitting the slingshot spear, only to get suplexed down. Balor reminds Gargano of his name and hammers away, only to get sunset flipped for two.

Gargano goes after the rest of Judgment Day, allowing Balor to hit a double stomp to the chest. The shotgun dropkick connects….and here is Edge through the crowd (as telegraphed by Damien Priest going up the aisle), allowing Edge to shove Balor off the top. One Final beat finishes Balor at 9:34.

Rating: C+. These two have had some awesome matches before but that was then and this isn’t NXT. For now, Gargano needed a win to give him somewhere to go and Edge costing Balor another win pushes them even closer to Wrestlemania. Nice TV match, but it does kind of show you how long has passed since the heyday of NXT.

Post match Lumis and Edge take out Judgment Day.

We recap Cody Rhodes and Roman Reigns’ showdown on Smackdown. Reigns asking “have you ever won that one” got me.

King and Queen of the Ring are back in Saudi Arabia on May 27. That’s the day before AEW Double Or Nothing.

Edge says he’ll be in the ring alone next week. If Finn Balor has the guts, come finish this.

Nikki Cross vs. Piper Niven

It’s a big brawl before the bell but Niven says ring the bell. Cross hits a crossbody to send Niven outside but can’t grab a swinging neckbreaker back inside. Instead, Niven grabs the Loch Ness Slam for the pin at 52 seconds.

Rick Boogs is trying to lift a semi truck when Elias comes in. Elias is trying to help him by getting Boogs to fight, so Boogs goes up to Bronson Reed. Unfortunately we get a miscommunication and it’s Elias vs. Reed next week. That’s not what Elias meant! Of note: Cody Rhodes and Kevin Owens could be seen talking in the background.

Here is John Cena (looking to have dropped A LOT of muscle) but before he can say anything, Austin Theory interrupts. Theory says Cena inspired him to get into wrestling so he has a gift for him (after the CENA chants die off that is): the two of them, one on one for the US Title at Wrestlemania. Cena: “No.” Cena says that Theory doesn’t have the authority to give a gift like that. Theory is a nothing guy with a generic look and no heart.

Cena points out a sign saying Theory is a Cena wannabe and says Theory is in the Ruthless Aggression Era. That time almost got Cena fired and now the people don’t see anything in Theory. Cena: “You’re a pair of trunks away from being a jabroni.” Cena says that Theory has the best name in WWE history. Not Steve Austin, the Rock, or the Undertaker, because there is no name better than Austin Theory. That’s exactly what he is: a theory.

In theory, he should be great and everything that a WWE executive look for. But he’s just a guy with no heart. Therefore, Cena and the people of Boston are giving him a gift: the chance to leave in one piece. Theory says he isn’t going anywhere, just like Cena’s bald spot. Theory talks about Cena’s NEVER GIVE UP shirt but saying no sounds like giving up to him.

The hat says RESPECT, but where is the respect for the people? Cena has a chance to face the greatest US Champion ever and he’s giving up? Where is the hustle, loyalty and respect? Cena: “I would much rather be bald than have them pipe in fake crowd noise for my matches because nobody cares.”

Cena didn’t say no because he gave up, but rather to save an unready Theory. If they fight at Wrestlemania and Theory loses, he loses everything. Then he’ll have to go out the next night on Raw and explain what happened. Therefore, Cena now has to ask the fans what they want. The fans are into it and approve, so Cena is in. Cena goes to leave but says Theory isn’t ready for Wrestlemania. Here’s someone who is though: Cody Rhodes, who gets the hug from Cena for the endorsement.

This was another very heavy verbal beating from Cena, as Theory needs to win something, but I’m not sure if it did much good for him, even if Cena wins. Cena beat him down so heavily and now Theory is going to have to do something big against Cena and then follow it up even better to make things better.

Sami Zayn can’t get through to Kevin Owens but he isn’t leaving without getting rid of Roman Reigns. Tonight, that means taking out Jimmy Uso.

Baron Corbin vs. Chad Gable

The fans want Otis as Corbin puts on an over the shoulder backbreaker. Gable is right back up with some rolling German suplexes and the ankle lock finishes Corbin off at 2:02. That worked, as it’s amazing how much easier it is to deal with the Alpha Academy when they don’t do their catchphrase over and over.

We look back at Becky Lynch and Lita winning the Women’s Tag Team Titles last week.

New Wrestlemania trailer: Miz and Maryse in Top Gun. These trailers feel like they came up with an idea but then didn’t bother making them funny/entertaining/good.

Logan Paul vs. Seth Rollins is set for Wrestlemania.

Here are Becky Lynch and Lita to celebrate being the new Women’s Tag Team Champions. Lita wanted one more chance and took what she had, but there is one more person to thank. Cue Trish Stratus, who is glad she could help, but here is Damage Ctrl to interrupt. Bayley is sick of hearing from Trish, who threatens to go from retired to unretired. The challenge for a six woman tag is thrown out and accepted rather quickly. That felt rather fast as I’m wondering if the show is running long.

Sami Zayn vs. Jimmy Uso

Solo Sikoa is here too. Sami goes right after him to start and we take a break less than a minute in. Back with Sami in trouble but he gets in a DDT for a breather. Zayn’s high crossbody gets two but he gets sent outside. Hold on as Sikoa almost goes after him, which is enough for an ejection. Back in and the Blue Thunder Bomb gives Zayn two as we take a second break just over six minutes into the match. We come back with both of them down and Jey Uso comes through the crowd. The distraction lets Zayn grab a rollup at 10:37.

Rating: C-. That was dangerously close to not having enough shown for a rating, which is hard to do in a ten minute match. This was of course all about the Jey appearance and setting up the big decision on Friday, which is going to be the latest step in the Bloodline Saga. It’s nice to see Zayn getting a win though, as you don’t want to have him get beaten into a pulp over and over again before the big Wrestlemania moment.

Post match Zayn goes to the floor and Jey gets in the ring to confront Jimmy. They stare at each other for a good while and Jey grabs him by the shoulders. Jey leaves, stares at Zayn, and hugs him (Zayn is SHOCKED), leaving Jimmy looking crushed. The posing is on, but then Jey superkicks Zayn and throws him inside (with Jimmy’s face turning into an evil smile). The big beatdown ensues, with Solo Sikoa coming out to make it worse. Cody Rhodes runs in for the save to end the show. That was great, as they FINALLY did something definitive and pulled the trigger on Jey, which had to be done.

Overall Rating: B. This was a show that was heavy on the emotion and moving the chains for Wrestlemania, which is what you need to do with less than four months to go. We had three new matches set up for the show, plus the big moment at the end. What matters is getting those things done by the time they get to Los Angeles and this show did a lot of the heavy lifting. It wasn’t so much that these matches were surprises (the six woman tag might be) but rather things that needed to be done. WWE did that tonight, and Wrestlemania feels bigger as a result. It was an efficient show, and that’s what WWE needed.

Results
Kevin Owens b. Solo Sikoa via DQ when Jimmy Uso interfered
Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOD
Omos b. Dolph Ziggler – Chokebomb
Johnny Gargano b. Finn Balor – One Final Beat
Piper Niven b. Nikki Cross – Loch Ness Slam
Chad Gable b. Baron Corbin – Ankle lock
Sami Zayn b. Jimmy Uso – Rollup

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – March 24, 2008: Get To It Already

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 24, 2008
Location: Colonial Center, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home Raw for Wrestlemania and that means we aren’t likely to see much of anything this week. The midcard will likely get some focus and the triple threat will probably do some staring, but other than that, I’m not sure how much of a risk WWE wants to put the starts into this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. Cena talks about how everything is coming to this Sunday when everything that we have gone through leads to one match. After everything else, Cena is looking pretty good to take the WWE Title….and here is Big Show to interrupt. Show promises to beat Floyd Mayweather Jr. at Wrestlemania, which will replace Hogan slamming Andre as the most iconic moment in WWE history.

Cue JBL to say his match will be memorable because there are no rules, meaning he can do anything he wants to Finlay. Cena: “I wasn’t listening to anything you said. I was thinking about how I beat your a** at Wrestlemania XXI.” Cue Randy Orton to interrupt, saying that some people have predictions about Wrestlemania, but no one thinks he is retaining the title. He feeds off of that doubt, and that is what people will be talking about after Wrestlemania.

Now it’s Umaga interrupting and actually taking the mic from Orton. Umaga says Batista and rants a lot until Cena says he is fluent in Samoan. Cena says Umaga talked about Orton being obsessed with boy bands but here is HHH to interrupt. HHH won’t say they’re wrong with everything they’re talking about, but Wrestlemania is about the WWE Title. It’s a good thing Wrestlemania is in an open air stadium because they would blow the roof off otherwise. Arguing ensues and here is William Regal to make the eight man No DQ main event, with Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair joining the good guys.

MVP/Carlito vs. CM Punk/Chris Jericho

MVP and Punk get things going with Punk quickly taking over and handing it off to Jericho. Carlito comes in as well and gets draped ribs first over the top as we take a break. Back with Jericho hitting the running crotch attack to Carlito but it’s too early for the Lionsault. Instead Jericho tries the Walls on an invading MVP but gets sent to the floor.

Back in and the double arm crank sets up a neckbreaker to give Carlito two. MVP grabs a neck crank but misses the running boot in the corner. It’s back to Punk to clean house as everything breaks down. Jericho comes in to try an enziguri but hits Punk by mistake, allowing MVP to grab the pin.

Rating: C. Take some people in the Money in the Bank ladder match, put them in a tag match and let them fight each other before the big match on Sunday. I’m not sure how much of an impact this is going to have, but how many other ways are there to build towards a ladder match? It also helps when you have this kind of talent in there, so the match was at least decent.

Mr. Kennedy promises to win Money In The Bank.

Video on Ric Flair, set to Leave The Memories Alone by Fuel.

Video on Big Show’s training regimen for his match with Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Great Khali vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly goes after him to start but gets caught with the usual. The chokebomb finishes for Khali without much difficulty.

Here is Ric Flair for a chat. He isn’t sure if he had Vince McMahon beat last week or not because Shawn Michaels had to interfere, despite Flair asking him not to. As of last week, Flair is losing respect for Shawn because he doesn’t think Shawn respects him. Flair invites Shawn out here right now, so here he is. Shawn is sorry to hear what Flair thinks, but Shawn could never lose respect for him.

The Flair that Shawn knows would always have backup and no matter what happens, Flair will always be the greatest of all time. Flair: “SHUT UP!” Flair goes on a rant about how he wants to prove he still has it….and whips out the NWA World Title. He first won the title in 1981 and if Shawn was 20 years younger, Shawn would have challenged him for it. Now it is 2008 and Flair has picked Shawn to show that he still has it one more time. Shawn promises to give him everything he has and on Sunday, Flair is getting in the ring with Mr. Wrestlemania.

That’s what Flair wants, but Shawn stops before leaving. Shawn talks about Old Yeller, and on Sunday, he is taking Flair out back and putting him out of his misery. That is WAY too far for Flair, who throws down the title and slaps Shawn in the face. Flair wants him to Old Yeller him right now, but Shawn promises to put Flair out of his misery and leaves. That is a direction for this story to go a long time before the match, but it is a different aspect to explore.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr. training to face Big Show.

We look at Big Show on Late Night With Conan O’Brien.

Maria vs. Melina

Beth Phoenix is here with Melina and trips Maria early on. That brings out Ashley to even things up, followed by Santino Marella. Jerry Lawler is so sick of Santino that he gets inside too and it’s six person tag time, as per William Regal.

Maria/Ashley/Jerry Lawler vs. Santino Marella/Melina/Beth Phoenix

We ring the bell and take a break (erg) before coming back with Lawler punching Santino out of the air. A backdrop and dropkick have Santino in more trouble so it’s off to Melina vs. Ashley. That doesn’t last long as Maria comes in for a headscissors but she walks into a spinebuster. Maria slaps Santino as the guys fight to the floor. Phoenix chop blocks Maria down and Lawler sends Santino back in, where he pins Maria in a hurry. This was kind of a weird mess.

HHH comes up to John Cena and promises to win the title. Cena doesn’t think so, because he never lost the title and wants it back.

John Legend is playing America the Beautiful at Wrestlemania.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Video on the Raw World Title match at Wrestlemania.

Randy Orton/JBL/Umaga/Big Show vs. John Cena/Shawn Michaels/Ric Flair/HHH

Michaels and Orton get things going with Orton taking him into the corner for some right hands. The armbar goes on but here is Finlay to beat up JBL and brawl with him up the aisle. Back with Umaga beating up Shawn as this is now 4-3. The running hip attack hits Shawn in the corner but here is Batista to take Umaga out in the aisle.

They fight to the back as well, leaving Show to beat up the good guys. House is cleaned but Show doesn’t think much of Orton tagging himself in. That means a chokeslam to Orton but HHH and Cena get in a fight on the floor. Flair goes for the Figure Four on Orton so Shawn punches him out. That earns Shawn a low blow and Flair Figure Fours Orton for the tap.

Rating: C. Much like the other tag match, there was nothing else to be done here other than throw people into a big match where no one is in there too long but it still feels big. In other words, it’s the last match on this show before Wrestlemania and this was about as good as it could have gone. If you ignore Flair beating the World Champion of course.

Overall Rating: C. There isn’t much that you can do here as the Wrestlemania card is all set up and WWE didn’t want to mess with anything. What matters is having me want to see Wrestlemania more than I did coming in and that’s only kind of the case. It’s a very skippable week, but none of that is going to matter in six days.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2014 (2015 Redo): Do They Have Your Attention Now?

Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

The big story here is the rise of Daniel Bryan, who has gone from solid midcard guy to the people’s choice to win the Rumble.  However, Batista has returned and is basically the guaranteed winner of the Rumble, no matter what the fans want to see.  I can’t imagine this ends well.  Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws reunited as a nostalgia act and pinned the champs to earn this shot. Dogg and Cody get things going with Dogg hammering away, only to miss his Shake Rattle and Roll punch. Cody misses the Disaster Kick but sends both Outlaws to the floor. The champs hit dives on the Outlaws as we take a break. Back with Goldust in trouble as Dogg puts on a chinlock.

The Outlaws double team Goldust for a bit until he hits a jumping sunset flip for two on Dogg. Gunn charges into a powerslam and there’s the hot tag to Cody. A missile dropkick drops both Outlaws and Cross Rhodes plants Dogg for two with Billy making the save. Gunn makes a blind tag and hits a Fameasser on Cody for the big upset win.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener and the fans were into the nostalgia. The Outlaws were only transitional champions anyway as the Usos would get the belts before Wrestlemania. Cody and Goldust had them back before the year was over too so no one was really hurt by this.

The opening video talks about working to achieve your dreams. Sometimes there’s a very thin line between almost getting there and getting everything you want. We also focus on Orton vs. Cena because that’s the real main event here. The Rumble itself gets a quick mention too.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Daniel joined the Wyatt Family on the last Raw of the year but then rejected them a few weeks later, leading to one of the loudest YES chants you’ll ever hear. Bryan punches out of the corner to start but Bray drives knees into his ribs and blasts him with an elbow. That’s fine with Bryan as he kicks the knee out but has to go after Bray’s followers Luke Harper and Erick Rowan. A suicide dive drops Harper but the referee ejects both monsters.

Bray huddles with his Family on the floor, allowing Daniel to take him down with a plancha. Back in and a high cross body gets two on Wyatt but he chops Daniel off the middle rope and out to the floor. Bray charges at Daniel but drives the bad knee into the steps to put him back down again. Back in and Daniel starts kicking at the leg before snapping off a dragon screw leg whip. A modified curb stomp gets two for Bryan but Bray drives him back into the corner.

They slug it out to the apron with Wyatt snapping Daniel’s shoulder down in a big crash. Back in and Bray hits his release suplex slam and we hit the chinlock. Bray puts Daniel’s head against the post and drives in forearms to follow up on Bryan’s recent concussion. Back in again and a kick to the face gives Bray a few near falls. A big release Rock Bottom plants him again and Bray does his Spider Walk out of the corner. Bryan finally avoids an elbow drop and hits a running clothesline.

Some kicks stagger Bray and a drop toehold sends him into the middle buckle. Daniel kicks away in the corner and nails a top rope hurricanrana for two. Another running clothesline is countered by a running elbow to the chest as Bray takes over again. Bryan low bridges him to the floor and hits a running tornado DDT off the apron. A running dropkick sends Bray into the barricade and a missile dropkick puts Wyatt down in the ring.

The YES Kicks get two but Bray turns him inside out with a clothesline for two. Sister Abigail is countered but Bray bites his way out of the YES Lock. Daniel scores with more kicks and hits a top rope splash but Bray ducks to the floor to avoid the running knee. The Flying Goat is blocked though and Bray hits Sister Abigail into the barricade to knock Bryan silly. Back in and another Sister Abigail is good for the pin.

Rating: A. This was considered a match of the year contender and it’s easy to see why. These two beat the tar out of each other with each move getting harder and harder than the previous. Bryan lost here but came out looking like a star. Bray on the other hand looks like a killer and that’s exactly what he’s supposed to be.

Paul Heyman says Brock Lesnar is going to challenge the winner of Orton vs. Cena for the World Title. However, first he has to make an example out of Big Show.

Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is here.

The expert panel of Jim Duggan, Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair aren’t sure who to pick between Lesnar and Big Show.

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

These two have had a feud for years and this time Big Show has been getting the better of it through pure power. Lesnar takes Show down before the bell and pounds on him with fists and then a chair. As Big Show is down, Lawler says Big Show gave Lesnar his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble, which would be three months before Lesnar debuted. We get the opening bell with Lesnar getting another chair but Show nails him with the KO Punch. Lesnar is rocked and Show takes him outside for a whip into the barricade. Back in and Big Show loads up another KO but Lesnar ducks and throws him up for the F5 for the easy pin.

Lesnar beats on him with the chair even more after the match. He’s broken two chairs over Show’s back.

Shield says they have 27 enemies tonight and it’ll be the three of them left standing. Only one of them can stand tall at the end but Reigns thinks he has the winning number. He won’t say what it is though. Dean offers to tell him his if Reigns tells his. Dean: “What if I have two numbers? I have ALL the numbers!” They agree to believe in the Shield.

Orton says he’s going to beat Cena and put him to the back of the line. Renee Young asks about Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots but Orton laughs it off and calls Wyatt a deranged hillbilly Duck Dynasty reject.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. This is more about their short term history, focusing on the titles being unified back in December. Orton seems to be cracking under the pressure of being champion and even attacked Cena’s father at Raw recently.

WWE World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

No countout and no DQ with Orton defending.. The fans loudly chant for Daniel Bryan before and after the bell. They hit the mat and the fans are already bored less than twenty seconds in. Cena fights up and gets two off a bulldog but charges into an elbow in the corner. Now a Randy Savage chant starts up and Orton stops for a second before kicking Cena even more.

Off to a chinlock as the fans chant for Y2J. After fighting out, Cena catches on and tries a Boston crab. Orton kicks him to the floor during a brief Undertaker chant and now it’s just the standard boring chant. A clothesline puts Orton back outside but he sends Cena into the steps. Back in and a DDT gets two for Orton as the fans just say both guys suck. Cena comes back with shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb, only to take too long jawing and walk into a powerslam for two.

A half nelson slam into a neckbreaker gets two for Cena but he gets caught on top. He headbutts his way out though and hits the top rope Fameasser for two. Orton counters the AA attempt into his backbreaker for two as the fans have calmed down a bit. The Elevated DDT off the apron to the floor gets two more on John. Orton’s RKO is countered into the STF but Randy is too close to the ropes. He grabs the ropes to block an AA as well but the refereee gets bumped.

There’s the STF again and Orton taps but there’s no referee. Orton uses the opportunity to nail Cena with a title belt for two. He stands around too long again though and takes an AA for two more. The RKO gets the same and now the fans want Divas. Orton misses the Punt but pulls Cena down into an STF. John counters that into a Crossface but Orton rolls into a cover for two.

Back up and Orton hits Cena with an AA, followed by Cena grabbing an RKO for another near fall. With nothing left to do, Cena loads up a middle rope AA but has to settle for a tornado DDT. The STF goes on in the middle of the ring….we’ve got Wyatts. The lights go out and come back on to reveal all three on the apron. Cena goes after them but walks into an RKO to keep the title on Orton.

Rating: B. This matchup has suffered from brand damage. We’ve seen it so many times over the years that even if the match is good, like it was here, people just do not want to see it. The guys got the crowd to calm down a bit about halfway through the match, but there’s just nothing left to see from these two. They’re both hard workers and try every time they’re out there but the interest is just gone.

The fans chant for Bryan as the Wyatts destroy Cena even more.

Tribute video to the recently passed away Mae Young.

The New Age Outlaws celebrate but tell Renee that she isn’t invited to the party.

We get some classic Rumble promos.

Miz will win because he’ll do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos are cool with having to fight each other.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. says headlining Wrestlemania is where it’s at.

Fandango thinks he’s the only one worthy to headline the big dance.

Batista just says exactly.

Damien Sandow says it’s insane to try the same thing and expect different results. He won’t make the same mistake again.

Ryback says there are 29 superstars and one Human Wrecking Ball.

Mysterio will shock the world again.

The expert panel makes their picks. Duggan likes Ziggler, Shawn goes with Shield or Punk and Flair takes Batista.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with Punk at #1 (as ordered by Kane) and Seth Rollins at #2. Punk takes him into the corner to start for some shoulders to the ribs. Some kicks stagger Rollins but he comes back with a big kick of his own. A clothesline drops Rollins again but he pops back up with an enziguri. Both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3. The fans loudly chant for Punk as he DDTs Sandow and drops Rollins with a neckbreaker at the same time.

The heels stomp Punk down until Cody Rhodes is in at #4. Cross Rhodes plants Sandow but Rollins stops an elimination attempt. Punk dumps Damien a few seconds later though and it’s time for Rollins to get double teamed. Kane comes in at #5 and cleans Punk’s clock. He loads up the chokeslam but Punk kicks him in the head for a surprise elimination. The debuting Alexander Rusev is in at #6.

Rusev kicks Rollins and Rhodes in the face but can’t eliminate either guy. Instead he just beats everyone up until Jack Swagger is in at #7. It’s Swagger vs. Rusev now but everyone opts to gang up on Rusev instead. Cody and Swagger break off and Kofi Kingston is in at #8. Everyone fights by the ropes until Jimmy Uso is in at #9. The announcers are noticing how fast the clock is going by.

Jimmy goes after Kofi in the corner as Rusev works on Swagger. Punk puts Rusev in a sleeper and Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Goldust, Cody, Jimmy, Swagger, Kingston and Rusev. Goldust hammers away until Rusev nails him in the jaw. A group of people gang up on Rusev and dump him out, which isn’t quite a great debut for him. Kofi gets thrown out as well but Rusev catches him in mid air. He drops Kofi on the barricade and it’s time for the great return. Kingston stands up, uses the barricade as a balance beam and jumps back to the apron in a pretty cool save.

US Champion Dean Ambrose is in at #11 and goes right after Punk. Things slow down again and Dolph Ziggler is in at #12. The fans are entirely behind Dolph as the ring is getting too full. Punk has to hang onto the apron as R-Truth comes in at #13, only to be dumped in about thirty seconds by Ambrose. Rollins knocks out Jimmy and Kofi steals Swagger’s boot while literally hanging on by his feet. Jack comes over to him but gets nailed by the boot as Kofi gets back in.

Kevin Nash makes a required return at #14. He eliminates Swagger with ease and goes after Ambrose and Rollins. Punk has Ziggler dangling but Dolph gets his feet back in. Roman Reigns completes the Shield at #15, giving us Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Goldust, Ambrose, Ziggler, Nash and Reigns. Roman cleans house with punches and spears before launching Kofi out.

Ziggler puts Roman down with a DDT but eats a spear to cut him in half. Reigns throws Ziggler out with ease and the fans suddenly hate him. Nash gets the same treatment as Reigns now has three eliminations in less than two minutes. Great Khali is in at #16 and goes after the Shield but gets tossed by Reigns. Goldust eliminates Cody to make up for the last two years but Reigns gets rid of Goldust a second later. That leaves the Shield alone with Punk but Sheamus returns after being out six months with an injury at #17.

Sheamus cleans house and gives Dean the ten forearms followed by an Irish Curse to Rollins. Reigns eats a Brogue Kick as Miz is in at #18. Punk is just laying in the corner and making almost no effort to get back up. Miz hammers away on Reigns in the corner and Fandango is in at #19. The entire crowd starts doing his dance but Miz sends him to the apron in just a few seconds. Fandango gets back in though as Shield slowly takes over again. Reigns motions to Punk in the corner but doesn’t go after him. Punk hasn’t moved from there in at least five minutes now.

El Torito is in at #20, giving us Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Miz, Fandango and Torito. Of course the bull cleans house until Punk stands up. Punk grabs him by the head but takes a headscissors, only to have Fandango run Torito over. The referee checks on Punk as Torito dropkicks Fandango out. Reigns catches Torito with ease and dumps him out for his sixth elimination. Punk gets back up as Cesaro is in at #21. He immediately starts swinging Miz but Shield breaks up a Swing attempt on Punk. Instead Rollins gets swung a ridiculous THIRTY TIMES. Luke Harper is in at #22 as Reigns spears Cesaro down.

Rollins and Cesaro slug it out until Jey Uso is in at #23. The brawling slows down a bit now and JBL is in at #24. Cole: “The JBL character has never entered the Royal Rumble.” Good grief. JBL wears his full suit into the ring but asks Cole to go get his jacket, allowing Reigns to dump him out. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” Erick Rowan is in at #25 as JBL tries to talk about ANYTHING but being in the Rumble. Rowan kicks Miz out to clear things up a bit but everything slows back down again.

Harper tosses Jey Uso but the Wyatts turn around to see the Shield. Ryback is in at #26 and goes right for Cesaro as the fans chant Goldberg. Alberto Del Rio gets lucky #27 and things slow down yet again. Batista is in at #28 and the fans just rip him apart. He quickly dumps Rowan and has a staredown with Ryback before dumping him as well. Del Rio, the man who has been going after Batista since he returned, superkicks him down but gets lifted into the air and dumped with ease.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. is in at #29 to almost no reaction but the fans like him for suplexing Batista. The fans are chanting for Bryan and get even louder as the countdown clock comes on. The clock runs out….and it’s Rey Mysterio. To say the fans aren’t pleased with this is the understatement of the year. We’re going to pause for a second here and look at this.

First of all, Rey Mysterio is a fine choice for #30 in the Royal Rumble. He’s a multiple time World Champion, he’s held nearly every title in WWE history, he’s going to be in the Hall of Fame one day, he’s the most successful cruiserweight of all time, he’s won the Royal Rumble before and he’s one of the most popular wrestlers ever. However, he’s not the right choice for this spot.

There are two schools of thought here. The first and more prominent is that WWE just did not understand the fans and thought they would accept Batista as the big star making his return and embrace him with open arms. Then they heard the reaction and changed course to make Wrestlemania all about Daniel Bryan. The other school of thought is Bryan not being in the Rumble was planned from the beginning, they knew where they were going at Wrestlemania the entire time and the stories about Orton vs. Batista headlining the show were false rumors. I’m in the middle on that but I lean more towards the second.

Now Bryan didn’t have to win the Rumble here. You could have had a bunch of different ways to get rid of him, even down to having Kane run out and eliminate him if need be. However, he should have been in the main event. It makes sense that he at least has a chance to be in there, even if it’s just to get screwed over again.

Anyway, we have a final grouping of Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Cesaro, Harper, Batista, Langston and Mysterio. Rey hurricanranas Punk to the apron as the fans are booing the heck out of the match. Sheamus clotheslines Langston out to end his worthless Rumble. Cesaro hammers on everyone in sight and Rey hits the 619 on Rollins just to make everyone even madder. Rollins enziguris Rey out for a nice pop and we’re down to eight.

Dean and Seth put Harper on the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out to give him eight eliminations. Ambrose tries to put out his Shield mates but Cesaro jumps he and Rollins. That’s fine with Reigns who dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose all at once to tie Kane’s record for eliminations in a single Rumble.

We’re down to four now and everyone hits a finisher. Reigns takes the GTS but Kane sneaks in to eliminate Punk. That would be Punk’s last WWE match to date. Kane goes off on Punk outside and chokeslams him through the announcers’ table. We’re down to Sheamus, Batista and Reigns but all three are down. Another Daniel Bryan chant starts up as Batista takes over, turning it into a NO chant.

Sheamus cleans house and points at the sign before loading up a Brogue Kick. He misses Batista though and gets backdropped to the apron. Reigns elbows Sheamus out to set a new Rumble record for eliminations with twelve. That leaves Reigns vs. Batista and all of a sudden everyone is a Reigns fan. Reigns wins a slugout and clotheslines Batista down as the people chant for Roman. Batista comes back with his own horrible spear, only to have Reigns show him how it’s done….and then get thrown out a few seconds later to send Batista to Wrestlemania.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t a very good Rumble though its moments. Batista came in at the wrong time and it killed any kind of comeback he could have had. The fans did not want to see what the company was offering them at this point and they let them know about it. In their defense though, this Rumble was kind of awful. The comedy and returns felt forced, Rusev’s debut went nowhere and they might as well have given it to Batista and put on an hour of Mighty Mouse cartoons to save everyone’s time. It’s not a good match but the crowd reaction is certainly interesting.

Batista is booed out of the building as we see a highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The Rumble really hurts this show as it drags down two good matches and an entertaining Lesnar squash. The problem is that’s the lasting memory of this show: the fans booing the heck out of Batista as WWE seemed to think he was exactly what WWE wanted. The show isn’t horrible but it leaves a really bad taste in your mouth.

Ratings Comparison

New Age Outlaws vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes

Original: C

Redo: C

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Original:A

Redo: A

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original:B

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original:B

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original:A

Redo: D+

Hokey smoke that’s quite the drop.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/01/26/royal-rumble-2014-the-night-the-crowd-died/

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Smackdown – December 30, 2022: Up And Down And Up And Up

Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2022
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

It’s the final show of the year and that means we are going to be seeing more than a few big things this week. First and foremost, John Cena is back for his only match of the year as he teams with Kevin Owens to face Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns. In addition, we have the Women’s Title on the line as Ronda Rousey defends against Raquel Rodriguez. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s is Bray Wyatt for an opening chat. Wyatt does not see himself as a good person but he does try. Looking back at how he got here, he doesn’t regret much, but last week he did something that he did regret. Last week, he apologized a cameraman in cold blood and….here is LA Knight to interrupt.

Knight cannot believe that the master of the mind games is here to apologize because he doesn’t buy any of this. Wyatt has been playing mind games and now it is time to pay the check. Knight remembers Wyatt being something around here and he wants Wyatt to be again. The Royal Rumble is coming up and Knight wants to make his first a special one. Wyatt doesn’t think much of Knight and accepts the challenge.

Cue Uncle Howdy for a rather slow walk to the ring (with the lights still down so we can’t really see him). Howdy and Wyatt stand next to each other and stare down Knight, but Howdy lays out Wyatt. Knight: “What the h*** is going on? None of this makes any sense.” Howdy leaves on his own. That’s at least another step forward in the story.

Sami Zayn goes to the Bloodline’s dressing room and finds Paul Heyman instead of Roman Reigns. Zayn thinks they need to talk strategy before tonight’s main event but first Heyman wants to talk about how happy Reigns is with Zayn’s loyalty last week. However, it seems that Reigns might not be happy with the fans getting behind Zayn. He hasn’t said anything, but the key is to stay ahead of the future. With that, Zayn goes in and Heyman looks a bit worried.

Sheamus vs. Solo Sikoa

As the match starts, Cole offers condolences to the family of Don West, who made an “impact” on the wrestling world. That’s a classy thing to do and it’s nice to see WWE acknowledge it in some way. A clothesline doesn’t get Sheamus very far to start so he knocks Sikoa over the top instead. An annoyed Sikoa grabs a chair but the Usos hold him back as we take an early break.

Back with Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with a Samoan drop. Sheamus fights up again and starts hammering away, including the ten forearms to the chest. The Brogue Kick is cut off with a superkick but Sheamus is right back with a running knee for two. It’s time for everyone to get in a fight on the floor, with Sheamus hitting a big dive off the top. The distraction lets Sikoa Rock Bottom Sheamus on the apron though and it’s the Samoan Spike to give Sikoa the pin at 11:07.

Rating: C+. It’s kind of impressive how well WWE has done with Sikoa. For someone who felt like a tacked on midcarder since his debut, WWE has turned him into a solid hand who could win almost any match that you put him in. This was another good outing from Sikoa and I’d like to see where he goes in the next few months.

Post match the beatdown is on and Sikoa wraps a chair around Sheamus’ neck. Before the running Umaga Attack can connect though, Drew McIntyre returns for the save to clear the ring.

Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Raquel Rodriguez

Rousey, with Shayna Baszler, is defending and goes right after Raquel’s bad arm to start. Rodriguez sends her into the corner though and hits an elbow as we take a break. Back with Rousey bending the arm around the rope and then pulling her down for a multiple limb crank (ouch). With that broken up, Rousey throws her down for two but Rodriguez powers up. A slam with the bad arm hurts both of them though and Rousey is right back with the ankle lock. That’s broken up as well and Rodriguez hits a flapjack for a breather. The Tejana Bomb is countered into an armbar and they head outside, where the Tejana Bomb onto the apron rocks Rousey as we take another break.

Back again with Rousey caught in a delayed suplex for two. The arm gives out though and Rousey grabs a Kimura, only to be powered up again. The Tejana bomb is countered into a choke but Rodriguez powers out again. This time it’s a Baszler distraction but Rodriguez is able to hit the Vader Bomb elbow anyway. Baszler puts the foot on the rope just in time, only to get ejected for some pretty flagrant cheating. With Rodriguez standing on the middle rope, Rousey climbs onto her and gets the armbar in the ropes. Rodriguez drops her back but lands on the elbow, meaning Rousey’s armbar is good for the tap at 16:20.

Rating: B. These two have some great chemistry together as this was their second good match against each other. Rodriguez not winning here is a bit more acceptable as she has the arm injury and Baszler interference to balance things out. WWE has done a nice job with her in recent months and I’d be stunned if she doesn’t win the title at some point in the year.

Post match Rousey and Baszler celebrate…..and Charlotte is back! She gets straight to the point: she is challenging for the Women’s Title TONIGHT. Rousey is in.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey

Charlotte is challenging. Big boot, spear, Rousey armbar, Charlotte rolls her up for the pin at 40 seconds. WWE is in on the CHARLOTTE WINS AGAIN now joke right? They have to be. And yes, Charlotte is the big hero in this.

Sami Zayn asks Roman Reigns if he’s cool with the crowd reactions. Reigns doesn’t seem thrilled.

We look at Dominik Mysterio being arrested for invading the Mysterios’ home on Christmas Eve. Rhea Ripley has since bailed him out.

A bunch of tag teams mock Top Dolla for his not so great dive last week. Dolla takes it well enough before shoving Ricochet. Holding back ensues.

Bray Wyatt vs. LA Knight is set for the Royal Rumble in a Pitch Black match.

Here is Imperium for a chat. Ludwig Kaiser introduces the team and brags about Gunther’s Intercontinental Title reign. We see a video on the title reign before Braun Strowman interrupts. Strowman didn’t see himself in that video and he wants his own title shot. Imperium goes to leave instead but Strowman grabs Gunther. The fight is on with Strowman clearing the ring but the run around ringside is sent through the barricade. Gunther wears Strowman out with a chair and they get inside, where Gunther grabs an armbar. Ricochet makes the save with a chair and clears the ring again.

Roman Reigns/Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens/John Cena

The rest of the Bloodline is here too. Owens hammers on Zayn to start as Cena does his always good job of playing cheerleader on the apron. With Zayn down in the corner, Owens brings up the SAMI chants, much to Reigns’ annoyance. Reigns comes in and stares down Owens, who looks over to Cena. That lets reigns blast him with a clothesline and a Rock Bottom for two as we take a break.

Back with Owens trying to get the tag but Cena is knocked to the floor. A superkick into the Pop Up Powerbomb gives Owens two, with Reigns making the save. Reigns beats Owens down and tags himself in, only to miss the Superman Punch. Owens nails a superkick and the bullfrog splash gets two.

Reigns counters the Pop Up Powerbomb into a Superman Punch but the spear only hits post. Cena is back up on the apron and there’s the hot tag for Cena to beat up Zayn. House is cleaned and Reigns is dropped as well, allowing the tag back to Owens. Stereo Shuffles hit the Bloodline and it’s an AA to Reigns, followed by a Stunner to pin Zayn at 10:59.

Rating: C+. This was a question of whether they would do the big angle here or wait for the fallout next week. Cena being back means a lot though, even if it is likely just a one off appearance. He still feels like one of the biggest stars ever and having him back boosted the show a lot. The match felt like something special and that is a sign that they did it right.

Overall Rating: B. The main thing I’ll say about this show is that stuff happened here. Between the multiple returns, the surprise title change and Cena being in the main event, this was a show that did not feel boring in any way. Good, fast paced show and Smackdown feels like it is heading for the new year on a bit of a roll for a change.

Results
Solo Sikoa b. Sheamus – Samoan Spike
Ronda Rousey b. Raquel Rodriguez – Armbar
Charlotte b. Ronda Rousey – Rollup
John Cena/Kevin Owens b. Roman Reigns/Sami Zayn – Stunner to Zayn

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – March 10, 2008 (Wrestlemania Rewind): Needs More Rewind

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 10, 2008
Location: Bradley Center, Madison, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s a special three hour show as we have Wrestlemania Rewind. In this case that means every match will be a Wrestlemania rematch, which could make for some interesting combinations a few years after the original matches. Other than that, either Randy Orton or HHH will be in charge tonight, which isn’t fair to the other two when they get two hours each. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Ric Flair to get things going. Last week, Shawn Michaels came out here and said that he was going to stop Flair’s show at Wrestlemania. That means Flair needs Michaels out here right now in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Cue Shaw, with Flair saying that is the best entrance in wrestling today. When Flair got started, the idea of sympathy did not exist and if he can’t compete in the ring with people like Shawn today, he doesn’t to do this anymore. Flair wants to be a franchise player and someone who can beat someone like Shawn on his best day.

Shawn brings up the “to be the man” line, because at Wrestlemania, he IS the man, and Flair’s career is ending. No matter what happens, the show is going to get stolen. Before Wrestlemania though, Flair has a 3-1 steel cage match against Edge and…uh, his Edge guys. Now Shawn’s Friday nights are usually reserved for Dora The Explorer, but he’ll make an exception this time. Cue Randy Orton to interrupt, calling this a touching, touching moment. Orton is in charge tonight, so we’ll have HHH vs. Kane and Shawn vs. the man he couldn’t beat last year at Wrestlemania: John Cena.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Casket match. Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline to continue the fast opening. Old School is loaded up but Henry pulls him into a bearhug. With that not working, Henry clotheslines him to the floor, where Undertaker lands on his feet and pulls Henry outside. A whip into the corner slows Undertaker down again so he rams Henry into the casket. Back in and something close to a World’s Strongest Slam gets Henry out of trouble, only to have Undertaker pull him into the choke. That’s enough to knock Henry out and put him in the casket for the win.

Rating: D+. That might be the shortest casket match I can remember and it felt like a way to have Undertaker on the show in some fashion. There was nothing to this one as Undertaker more or less squashed him in a hurry. Granted that’s how it should have been, but this wasn’t the most interesting option.

Floyd Mayweather Jr. and company are here.

Boxing people talk about Big Show vs. Mayweather Jr.

Earlier today, HHH talked about being ready to get the title back because it is two years in the making. Cena, Orton, game on.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay

They were in a Money in the Bank ladder match before so this counts as a rematch. Hold on though as JBL pops up on screen to say he’ll beat up Finlay so bad that he’ll be in a bed next to Hornswoggle. The bell rings and Finlay beats on him with the shillelagh for a DQ in about fifteen seconds.

Post match the beating continues and Finlay knocks him silly.

WWE is doing something with Make A Wish. Apparently John Cena does a lot with the charity. Like him or not, that is another level of work.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy is defending. JR: “One has to wonder what Chris Jericho’s motive is in this match.” Lawler: “To win the Intercontinental Title and be the champion.” They get on with the brawl (based off of some issues on the Highlight Reel a few weeks back) early until Jericho clotheslines him over the top.

We take an early break and come back with Hardy hitting the dropkick through the ropes. Hardy’s barricade running clothesline only hits announcers’ table though and things slow down a good bit. Back in and Jericho bends the back over his knee before kicking Hardy in the head. Hardy finally fights up and hits something like a Sling Blade, plus a Whisper in the Wind for two.

They go to a pinfall reversal sequence until Hardy misses some kind of flip. Jericho’s high crossbody is rolled through to give Hardy two but the Twist of Fate is countered. The Lionsault gives Jericho two but he misses the running enziguri, allowing Hardy to hit the Twist of Fate. Hardy misses the Swanton though and it’s a Codebreaker to give Jericho the pin and the title.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but the last few minutes were what you would expect from these two. Hardy has been on a bit of a downward slide at the moment, as at some point he has to actually win the bigger matches. Winning the Intercontinental Title doesn’t mean much for him, but it does give Jericho a needed boost. Good match too, at least once things really got rolling.

Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik vs. US Express

Hold on though as Jillian Hall is here for her own version of Born In The USA. That earns her the airplane spin from Mike Rotunda, as we have no match (thank goodness).

Next up for the Hall of Fame: the Briscos. Yeah that works, and as usual the old footage is great.

Video on Big Show.

Kane watches a clip of HHH beating him at Wrestlemania XV. We’re still allowed to talk about that one? Anyway, Randy Orton comes in and wants Kane to hurt HHH tonight but Kane doesn’t want a history lesson.

HHH vs. Kane

Kane slugs him into the corner to start but HHH punches his way to freedom. Back up and Kane takes it outside, where HHH reverses a whip into the post. Kane slugs away back inside and kicks HHH in the face, only to charge into a spinebuster. The facebuster staggers Kane again but the Pedigree is countered. As Randy Orton comes out to watch, HHH slips out of the chokeslam and hits the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this VERY simple and to the point, as HHH gets to beat up the monster clean. Then again it isn’t like Kane is worth much at the moment and has just been kind of going through the motions. What matters here is HHH though, as he gets the big win and builds momentum towards Wrestlemania, meaning they accomplished the goal.

John Cena talks about how important Wrestlemania is. It’s the reason why he worked so hard to come back from his injury so soon, because Wrestlemania is what matters more than anything else. He respects Randy Orton, but it is going to be a fight to be the best. Cena’s time will come again.

Melina vs. Ashley

Beth Phoenix is here with Melina but there’s no Ashley, as she is hurt. We have a replacement though.

Melina vs. Maria

Beth Phoenix and Candice Michelle are here too. Maria charges into a boot in the corner to start as the shrieking is on to start. Now it’s Santino Marella coming out to watch, complete with a copy of Maria’s Playboy. Santino rips it up for a distraction, allowing Melina to hit a reverse DDT for the pin.

Post match Beth helps Melina beat the other two down.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr. He has a lot of money.

Here is Shane McMahon for the official Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. weigh-in. Mayweather weighs 159lbs and Show weighs 441. Show isn’t interested in the photo, but he does bring up Mayweather’s posse. Instead he brings out his own posse in the form of the locker room. Show points out that no one here likes Mayweather and promises pain at Wrestlemania. Mayweather pulls out cash, smells it, and talks about how he respects Big Show.

As the WHAT treatment goes on, Mayweather says Show has to catch him to hurt him. Show takes the case and hands it to some of the wrestlers so Mayweather promises to break Show’s jaw at Wrestlemania. Everyone goes to leave, but Show grabs Mayweather and throws him over the top, onto a bunch of the wrestlers. Mayweather comes up favoring his shoulder and runs to the back with everyone else going behind him.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Randy Orton says he’s HHH and John Cena plus more rolled into one. Wouldn’t that get a little cramped?

Edge vs. CM Punk

Non-title and the Edgeheads are here with Edge. Punk kicks him in the face to start but walks into a hot shot for his efforts. Some strikes don’t work very well for Punk but he is fine enough to fight out of a suplex. A knee to the face and some kicks set up the springboard clothesline for two on Edge. That earns Punk a quick DDT from Edge but Punk is back up with the GTS attempt. Cue the Edgeheads for a distraction though and the spear gives Edge the pin.

Rating: C. Punk has taken a few hits as of late and doesn’t seem to have much going in the way of momentum. Granted some of that might just be due to feuding with Chavo Guerrero for weeks on end, but losing to Edge isn’t quite as bad. Punk certainly has the talent, and now all he has to do is put the pieces together to make it work

Here is William Regal to talk about the Raw vs. Smackdown match between Umaga vs. Batista. Regal isn’t worried about Batista, which sends us to a video on Umaga. As Regal talks about how he pities Batista at Wrestlemania, here is Batista to interrupt. The fight is on with Batista hitting the spinebuster to send Umaga running.

Vince McMahon is getting a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame.

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena

They trade hammerlocks to start as we talk about their history against each other. Neither can get very far until it’s Cena trying to get the STF, sending Shawn to the floor and us to a break. Back with Cena cranking on the arm until Shawn swinging neckbreakers his way to freedom. Cena gets tossed over the top and it’s time to start in on the knee back inside.

A quick AA attempt doesn’t work as the knee gives out, with Shawn chop blocking Cena to damage the knee even worse. Cena is fine enough to kick Michaels into the corner though and the clothesline comeback is on. The Shuffle connects but the FU is countered into a pinfall reversal sequence.

They collide for a double knockdown and a breather, allowing Shawn to hit the flying forearm. The top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music but Cena grabs the foot. That’s fine with Shawn, who pulls him into that reverse Figure Four. With that broken up, Cena is sent outside and Shawn hits a dive, only to have Randy Orton run in to deck Cena for the DQ.

Rating: B-. These two are always going to work well together so the quality was hardly a surprise. It also helps that they got some time, but Orton running in was the best way to go given how strong both of them need to be going into Wrestlemania. It’s no classic, but Shawn vs. Cena in any form is at least worth a look.

Post match the RKO onto a chair is countered into a shove onto the chair, setting up the FU to drop Orton.

We cut to HHH in the back, who is in charge next week. Therefore, next week it’s John Cena and Randy Orton teaming up to face….the entire Raw roster. Oh boy.

Overall Rating: C. The nostalgia was fun, but it was also pretty limited, with some random rematches and cameos, plus some rematches that only kind of took place originally. I can go for an old school show, but this wasn’t exactly their best effort. They’re making me want to see Wrestlemania though so they are getting the big picture right.

 

 

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Over The Limit 2010: When Punk Gets Mad

Note that this was written live in 2010 and the quality is far, far below what I would have today.  I apologize in advance.

Over the Limit 2010
Date: May 23, 2010
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

It seems like we’re STILL on the same angles as we were on at Mania. I’m not sure if that’s good or not. Allegedly tonight is Batista’s last or one of his last appearances with WWE. I’m not so sure if that’s the case or not but with the gimmick match tonight, it’s certainly possible. Also on the card tonight we have Swagger vs. Big Show in a match I truly can’t predict but on instinct it’s Swagger. That all being said, let’s get to it.

We have a Spanish announce team. That’s rather odd for this day and age.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre

Could Drew’s music be sweeter? So remember the idea here is that Drew got stripped of the belt and Kofi won a tournament for it. Drew got it put back on him because Vince likes him. This is the big showdown for it I guess. Drew jumps him early as Striker thinks we need to know that it’s been eleven years since the title has changed hands in Detroit. Ok then. The fans are all over Drew who is dominating early.

Apparently most people don’t like working with him which is odd. I guess you can tell more when you’re in the ring though. That makes more sense at least. Smackdown has definitely been having the better in ring stuff lately and this shouldn’t be an exception. Drew does one of those idiotic spots where he jumps into Kofi’s feet when he puts them up. What the heck was that supposed to be? The set might look cool but I can’t tell.

There’s this weird kind of spotlight thing going on from the end of the arena behind the announcers. It’s rather odd and looks like 6 lights coming off of it. Boom Drop in the corner of all places hits. Ok then. Trouble in Paradise misses and the SOS gets a clean pin. Wow did not see that one coming.

Post match Drew gets on the mic and says the show doesn’t keep going until he’s declared champion by Teddy Long. Instead we get Matt Hardy to an ERUPTION. Seriously it’s been like two weeks not 4 months. Twist of Fate puts Drew down.

Rating: B-. Not bad for an opener I guess. Kofi winning is kind of a surprise but I’d bet on Drew being pushed higher up on the card or into something against Christian or someone like that. Anyway, Kofi doesn’t need the title really, but then again neither does McIntyre. This worked well enough I guess and wasn’t bad at all. Not up to their TV stuff but not bad at all.

Punk is looking in a mirror and says he’s awesome. Tonight Mysterio goes straightedge. Luke hugs him which is kind of awkward.

We recap Ted DiBiase vs. R-Truth. This is a simple but effective feud. What more can you ask for? In short, Ted wanted Truth to be his Virgil.

Ted DiBiase vs. R-Truth

Truth’s entrance is awesome. I’m not a fan of him but I have to give him that one. The real Virgil is here with him instead. You can’t beat that for old school guys. Striker says rich people are better. Amen to that brother man. We even get a Virgil chant. WOW. Cole says that DiBiase paid a couple of guys a few weeks ago to take out R-Truth. One was Carlito. That’s rather amusing.

We get a Harley Race impression from about 1983 and the bounty to take out Flair. I love obscure references like that. Truth busts out a Downward Spiral. I hate that move. Virgil looks more or less exactly the same as he used to. That’s either really impressive or bad. This is really sloppy. Truth…kind of hits the Lie Detector (spinning forearm) for the clean pin. That was bad. Virgil gets the Million Dollar Belt and tries to wake up DiBiase, despite the forearm grazing him at best.

Rating: D. Not very good and just SLOPPY. The stuff came off as weak looking and just all over the place. I didn’t like what I was seeing and the Truth pin just came off as from out of nowhere, which isn’t bad I guess.

Drew goes into Teddy’s office and says change the decision. Drew destroys the office and a picture of Martin Luther King. Never mind as he doesn’t wreck the picture.

We recap the Punk/Rey feud. More or less, Punk wants Rey in the SES. Rey says they’re hypocrites. This is one of the matches I have no clue on, which is the point I guess.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

All outside parties are banned here, which makes me think Masked Man messing things up somehow. Rey is in yellow tonight which makes him look stupider than usual somehow. Punk jumps him to start. That’s my boy. We get into a semi-Master/Slave dialectic from Lawler. That was bizarre but an essay on that got me through a college class. In a SICK spot, Rey gets thrown into the barber’s chair at ringside. That seriously HURT.

Punk is cut open too so they have to stop the blood flow. Can we get Linda in the Senate already? Rey looks at something under his wrist tape for some reason. The match stops for like three minutes because of this. We get an EPIC boring chant and Punk goes off. Seriously, a trickle of blood is ok. Stopping a PPV for that long because of a cut like that is idiotic. I’ve never seen Punk snap like that and I loved it.

Rey hits a sunset flip powerbomb for two. They crank it up and they both get a bunch of near falls. We get some weird dueling chants that I can’t quite make out. GTS of course doesn’t work. Punk gets a corner powerbomb though. Nice one. Punk kicks Rey’s head off. GTS is reversed again and Rey hits the 619. Springboard Splash misses though and this is a good match.

And then we get the same pin that HHH beat Jeff Hardy with at some PPV where Rey rolls him up off a sloppy pin. I hate Vince. Punk is busted open again. Here comes Gallows and Serena and I hope I don’t know what’s coming. They have handcuffs. And here’s….KANE? What the HECK? Punk is handcuffed and gets his hair cut. I hate WWE sometimes. I truly do.

Rating: B+. I really liked this match. I hate the booking, but the in ring stuff was great. There were all kinds of great back and forth things going on here with the great near falls. I can’t blame them for the cut thing as that’s a company decision. Also Punk just going OFF after that was great.

Ad for Fatal Fourway with all championships being in the title of the show style of matches.

Jericho makes fun of Show and Miz sneaks up on him which doesn’t work. Show threatens to know Jericho out, wake him up and knock him out again. This was funny.

And now let’s have a trailer for Prince of Persia.

Unified Tag Titles: Hart Dynasty vs. Chris Jericho/The Miz

There’s not much to say here at all. It’s not bad but it’s ok I guess. Natalya is solid as a manager. They say that on Monday when Hart won the US Title he was in his homeland. They make it sound like he came from an island nation with like four people on it. It’s a very standard tag match which is both good and bad I suppose. Kidd takes the Walls and the Codebreaker off a springboard. It just wasn’t a very good one. Somehow that only gets two. Wow.

Jericho goes off and yells at Kidd to stay down. That was kind of amusing. We’re getting a lot of near falls here. Miz and Jericho yell at the referee A LOT. Natalya trips Jericho and Smith hits the powerslam for the LONG two. This started slow but has gotten a lot better.

Skull Crushing Finale is blocked but Miz gets a rollup and the tights for two. VERY good match here. I’m very surprised. Miz does his running clothesline into the corner but Smith catches him to set up the Hart Attack. NICE match with a SWEET ending.

Rating: B. I liked this a lot more than I expected to. Like I said it started slow but it picked WAY up soon after that. The clean retaining surprised me very much actually but it’s certainly a good thing. They needed that for some credibility and I’ve very glad they didn’t do the switch to another random tag team. Nice match and a very pleasant surprise.

We recap Edge vs. Orton which is just that Edge turned heel again and had a great segment on Raw to set this up. This is the most hyped show on the card. Not sure if it’s going to live up to it. I doubt it will actually.

Edge vs. Randy Orton

They try to talk down the pop that Orton gets for no apparent reason. Orton goes for no tape again which is his new look I guess. Nothing wrong with that. Orton dominates early as would be expected I guess. Edge takes ove and the match is decent enough I guess. Edge hooks a body scissors and the fans think it’s boring. Orton reacts and counters with elbows to get a HUGE RKO chant going. Orton hits the elevated DDT to a huge pop.

The lack of tape thing is working for me. Spear is blocked by a kick. This crowd is NUTS for Orton but his arm is hurt from earlier. Hey we got some psychology in there! Orton might be legit hurt. Yeah he must be. We go to the floor and Edge misses a spear. This has to be legit. At least I think it is. Oh dear.

Rating: C-. What we got is what I’m grading it on as it’s pretty clear that wasn’t the planned ending. Orton was doing his mat slap thing and just stopped dead. Also no way that was going to end in a double count out. Until then it wasn’t that good but it did ok.

We recap Swagger vs. Show which you can read the Smackdown review if you want the story on.

Smackdown World Title: Jack Swagger vs. Big Show

This is another one where I don’t know how it’s going to end. Show uses some wrestling here and Swagger’s look is great. SHOW DOES PUSHUPS! Somebody get that boy a Twinkie before he passes out! Swagger goes for the leg and that doesn’t work. Show keeps coming back. After some boring stuff, Show sets for the chokeslam…..and Swagger blasts him in the head with the belt for the intentional DQ. WOW.

Well they went old school with that so I can’t complain. Two belt shots and Show gets up. A chair shot doesn’t work either and Swagger takes a chokeslam. So the world champion can’t put a guy down with two belt shots and a chair. Right. Show drops him with a punch again. Pay no attention to Swagger opening his eyes to make sure things are going right.

Rating: D. It was short and the ending completely sucked. Swagger looks weak after losing to Kofi on Monday. He’s also lost to Morrison and Orton. Is there a point to him being champion? Yes he’s champion, but he’s another weak champion. It’s a good bit annoying but that’s WWE for you. They’ve been awesome lately so I can’t complain much I guess.

We recap Batista vs. Cena and Batista says he’ll make Cena say he quits.

Raw Women’s Title: Maryse vs. Eve Torres

This is better than I’d expect it to be actually. This has gotten some great build over the past few weeks and due to a lack of matches they have to give it a lot of time. Maryse randomly starts crying for no adequately explained reason. We actually get some near falls. Eve hits some messed up face plant into a rollup for the pin. Cole, Striker and Lawler make jokes about Eve and just lose it on commentary.

Rating: C-. For what you had to work with here and given what Divas matches tend to be, this was actually decent. I tend to start most Divas matches at a D or so, meaning this was pretty good. There was some actual drama and Eve won with a nice finisher. Solid little match.

We recap Batista vs. Cena which is about 3 months old now. Mainly it’s about Batista being mad about getting Duct-Taped to the post to lose last time.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Batista

Batista has a mic and asks Cena if he wants to quit right now. Batista says the words I Quit but for some reason that’s not the end of the match. Cena of course blasts him with the mic. He has a chair within seconds. Some hero eh? Cena gets the split chants again. You can’t argue the guy gets people talking. The problem here is you don’t have to watch the first 20 minutes or so here as nothing is going to happen.

Batista hits the spear if you want to call it that. The fans are awesome tonight. Batista hooks his Rings of Saturn kind of thing but puts far less pressure on it. Cena stands up to get out of it and there’s the STFU. Ropes don’t count for breaks here. Batista passes out in the hold. Some animal indeed. In Austin vs. hart that would be enough. Not here I guess though. Cena gets some water and wakes him up. Ok, now HOOK THE HOLD AGAIN.

Cena won’t quit off a spinebuster. So Batista takes about 9 hours to set up the two tables on the floor and Cena just lets him. I can’t say I blame him though as it’s a breather for him. Batista gets a powerslam through one of the tables and Cena is cut BAD. Let’s get an EMT out there as we can’t have blood in an anything goes match! This is idiotic. We head into the crowd for a bit now and walk forever.

I guess they wanted to get away from the doctors. Cena is told to quit or he’ll be thrown over. Cena has to answer apparently. Or what? He’ll get water thrown on him? Idiotic line if there ever was one. Cena fights out of it and they fight on the barrier up there. Dangerous looking spot and Batista falls all of 6 feet onto some people. Shockingly, that doesn’t end it. I’m glad as if they didn’t it would have sucked to say the least.

They fight up to the entrance near some cars. I wonder if that’s how it ends. Cena won’t quit and the crowd POPS. Batista gets in a car which of course has the keys in the ignition and he runs into Cena and the set which shoots off some sparks. Apparently he didn’t hit Cena as he’s up and fighting. Striker says Cena had to have moved since there’s no other way to explain that. FU onto a 78 Camaro and he won’t quit.

Cena grabs the mic and says he was really hoping Batista would say that. They go on top of the car and Batista quits to avoid the massive FU. Of course he gets it anyway and goes through the stage. Post match Cena celebrates and the graphic in the corner pops up and they say good night but Sheamus kicks his head off as he turns around to really end it. I like that.

Rating: B. This was good. I don’t think anyone believed Cena was going to lose here which is fine. He went over as strong as possible and Batista looks like a defeated man if that’s the end of his run with the company. Either way this was a solid match and a solid way to end the show. It was over the top but that’s fine. Now, KEEP THEM APART.

Overall Rating: D. This just didn’t do it for me. And before anyone jumps on me and says I overreacted to Punk/Rey, heck yes I did. I don’t like Rey and Punk is my favorite wrestler. It’s part of being a fan so shut up with the whole biased arguments. Heck yes I’m biased. Anyway, this show just wasn’t very good.

The best way I can put it is unnecessary. This show was unnecessary. Nothing of major note happened other than Punk and Rey. There was some solid wrestling on the show, but there was just too much that didn’t work for me. Having literally no heels win is just a weird thing to do. This show isn’t as bad as people are saying, but it wasn’t good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.