Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2004 (Original): The Future Is Now

Summerslam 2004
Date: August 15, 2004
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,640
Announcers: Jim Ross, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz

Once again another year has passed since Summerslam. Isn’t it odd how that’s always the case? Either way, things are indeed different now, as Chris Benoit finally broke through the glass ceiling and won the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania 20. Tonight he faces Randy Orton who is 22 years old and has all the potential in the world. When he won a battle royal for the #1 contender spot, no one knew what to think other than oh crap he might win it.

Other than that we have JBL vs. Taker for the Smackdown Title, which means little as JBL was already sucking badly, although for a different reason. In this case, JBL just had no resume as the character was brand new and two months after debuting he won the world title. Why should we buy into this character? That question was never actually answered so for the most part we didn’t.

Oh and there’s some guy named Cena who was on the roster last year but couldn’t manage to get on the show. He’s wrestling Booker T tonight in the first of a best of 5 series for the US Title. That series wouldn’t end for two months, which in itself is just stupid. Let’s get to this, as the card looks….interesting I guess you’d say.

The entrance video is set to Rush’s Summertime Blues, so that’s a bit of a perk. The idea is that this is the culmination of the summer, and because of that we get a humorous video of WWE guys in Olympic events. Oddly enough Angle isn’t shown in that. For some reason, the Smackdown Title is listed last, and I mean completely last.

It’s billed after everything, which isn’t saying much for it. Oh also I forgot to mention, the third big match is Angle vs. Guerrero in a Wrestlemania rematch which should be good. The arena looks very cool with the screen shaped in a half circle over the entrance to the arena so it looks kind of like the sun setting.

Dudleys vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman/Paul London

Here we have Spike as the new boss of the Dudleys. He’s the Cruiserweight champion and is heel now as well. He’s apparently been “calling the shots” for some time now, although no one has ever figured out what moron green lighted this angle. No one took Spike seriously, ever, so it’s stupid to think that they would here either. Anyway, Spike took the title from Rey so Rey got two of his jobber tag team friends to help him out and this is what you get.

For some reason that I have no idea of, I remember this match being booked and thought it would steal the show. I have no idea what I was on but I’d love to have some more of it. Cole calls something vintage Spike. And so it begins. Two of them in less than two minutes. Did we never notice this before somehow? London and Kidman are the Smackdown tag champions at this time by the way, so yeah, screw that whole defending belts on PPV idea.

That just can’t be done obviously. Rey and Spike finally get together and apparently this is the reason this match is happening. Of course this is the better way to go instead of, oh I don’t know, DEFENDING A TITLE ON PAY PER VIEW? Rey is beating up all three of them by himself. You have to love the super powers that star power gives you. It’s a mess now of course and Rey and Kidman actually use the Hart Attack with Kidman being the powerhouse of the team.

619 leads to a shooting star press but D-Von makes the save. Kidman tries to fight off the two Dudleys that weigh more than 18lbs but eventually gets caught in the 3D and Spike gets the pin. Cole has come to a conclusion: Spike is now the boss of the Dudleys. Thank you for telling us again what you said at the beginning of it.

Rating: B-. I really liked this match. 6 man tags are a good way to open a show as they’re usually fast paced and offer a variety of combinations so if one matchup is bad the rest can balance it out nicely. This was fine here as it was two title feuds combined into one so that’s all good. However, there’s a point to having PPVs. They’re places where big matches are supposed to happen. When I say big matches, I mean matches where titles are on the line.

Lawler in a suit just doesn’t look right.

It’s recap time as our subject right here is Matt Hardy vs. Kane. Here’s the deal: Matt and Lita were engaged, but for some reason Kane hated Matt. Lita slept with Kane to keep him at bay, and now she’s pregnant with his baby. Insert your own soap opera related title joke here. The winner of this match gets to marry her. Yeah I know just go with it.

Matt Hardy vs. Kane

I’ve always loved Lita’s theme at this time. Matt’s is pretty sweet too actually. Kane is finally in his traditional attire so we’re starting to look modern here. Amazingly enough, this isn’t the stupidest stipulation in the history of Summerslam. Matt at this point had more or less no track record to speak of. He was a low level guy and this was probably his biggest feud to date, so he’s the epitome of the underdog here. He starts off fast though.

This was also when he still wasn’t fat and was at least trying very hard out there, which is all you can ask for a lot of the time. Matt more or less throws everything he’s got at Kane inside the first three minutes, including a Twist of Fate on the floor which gets a 9 from the referee (it had a good beat but I couldn’t dance to it do I give it a 65). Anyway, Matt fights with everything he’s got, but it’s just not enough.

This match is just hard to comment on as it’s barely over 6 minutes with a minute of that being the outside sequence. Lita slides the bell in to Matt, and her shouting of MATT doesn’t clue the referee in on the fact that they’re cheating, nor does the bell sound when he hits Kane with it. Screw the company sending the old guys to rehab. Send the referees to an optometrist. Anyway, Kane finally gets going but he’s on offense all of 40 seconds, which somehow is enough.

He goes up top for the clothesline but Matt crotches him. He tries a DDT from the top but gets chokeslamed instead. Matt’s landing of almost trying to sit up and just falling backwards is just great. Lita is of course stunned. The wedding would be tomorrow night and of course, it went bad.

Rating: B. Call me crazy, but I really liked this. It was way to short to be considered great, but in the time they had, it was certainly intense. You could feel Matt and Lita’s nervousness and it paid off. The chokeslam was great too, and Lita’s face at the end was both beautiful and destroyed at the same time. Short but very sweet.

Randy Orton is in the back, being asked by Todd “I swear I really do have a penis” Grisham about his match tonight. Orton is talking about how he’s going to win tonight when Cena comes in. He’s a rapper at this point and completely annoying. The showdown between these two does look cool though, considering what was coming. Cena asks the fans who will win and they say Benoit. This was nothing special, but it still looked cool just for the future aspect.

Booker T vs. John Cena

This is the first match in a best of 5 series for the title, which I think I kind of like. However, this took TWO MONTHS to get through. How is that possible? PPV, Smackdown, House Show, Smackdown, PPV. There, one month, 5 matches. This feud wouldn’t end until October though, so what’s the point? Cena is still a rapper at this point, and is rocking the Blue Jays old school jersey which is awesome.

Again, THIS IS SHORT. I don’t get the point in having all these 6-7 minute matches. Either way, the problem here is simple: the fans don’t care because they know there’s at least two more matches with these guys, so why should they care about this one? Nothing is going to happen at the end of it, so why should they care? I certainly don’t and I can’t imagine they did when it was actually happening either.

Cena was really starting to find his audience here and in the coming months would be launched into the main event of Smackdown, although he would have perhaps the worst world title change in the history of Wrestlemania as that show was all about Batista and HHH.

Either way, this is just not that interesting of a match as they can’t waste their best stuff with four matches to go and the fans aren’t that interested. That being said, maybe it’s good that this match is about six and a half minutes. Booker spins up and Cena calmly picks him up and FUs him for the win. This could be a textbook definition of a quick and uninteresting finish.

Rating: D. Like I said, they couldn’t use much of their best stuff, no one was interested, and it was way too short. Either way, this was just a bad match and it showed really bad. They would go on to improve huge, but this was a very bad way to start.

Teddy Long, still the Smackdown GM, is joined by Bischoff who would be fired in about a year. They lay the groundwork for Raw vs. Smackdown at Survivor Series and talk about Eugene.

Diva Dodge ball later tonight. Oh this isn’t going to go well.

IC Title: Batista vs. Jericho vs. Edge

Edge is champion here, having returned from injury and declared war on Evolution, although I don’t remember him ever getting to HHH. At the time, Batista was the hottest thing in wrestling to say the least. He was getting great face pops every time he came out, while Jericho was a face at this point. Edge of course was awesome, but he still didn’t have that spark he had pre injury.

His style has completely changed here as you can tell he’s tentative about going too hard, but at this point it was finally starting to wear off. Batista is also rocking a near mullet here with much longer hair than you’re used to. Batista had been using this big running clothesline to knock people out lately, similar to Luger’s forearm. Jericho as the home country boy gets a big pop. Edge still has his old music, but gets a bigger pop as Toronto’s own, according to Lillian.

We already are getting the Batista shoulders in the corner which still have that little stomp before them. The red boots aren’t working for him either. Edge stops Batista from hitting the Bomb on Jericho, which makes no sense as it would have made it a one on one match, but what do I know? Lawler says that Edge is opportunistic, so maybe Lawler is smarter than we all gave him credit for.

JR says that he’s complex. Didn’t that aspect of his character get thrown out a long time ago? Edge just towers over Jericho which is very funny looking to me. Batista is down on the floor so it’s Canadian on Canadian violence. Surprisingly the crowd is behind Jericho. I mean they’re REALLY behind Jericho. Edge is actually getting no reaction at all while you’d think Bret Hart was the guy he was fighting.

Batista gets back in and Edge goes for a spear on him, but Jericho knocks Edge out of the way. WHY WOULD HE DO THAT? It would wipe Batista out and then it would be one on one again, and since Batista had to make a save to end the Walls of Jericho just a second ago, you’d think that Jericho would want it one on one with Edge.

Anyway, Batista, who for a guy that is supposed to be a killer is on the floor a lot, is on the floor again as Jericho and Edge go at it one more time. This time, Jericho knocks Batista BACK to the floor, allowing Edge to hit the spear to keep the belt to no reaction. I mean the place is silent. It’s very weird indeed.

Rating: C. This was kind of a bunch of revolving one on one matches and while it didn’t fail, it didn’t really work either. Batista needed more seasoning, but screw that I guess because he was put into the main event just a few months later as he won the Rumble and headlined Mania in about 8 months. Either way, this was more about Edge vs. Jericho and while that’s fine, it was supposed to be a triple threat and from that standpoint it was just ok.

Ad for the Benoit DVD.

Recap of Angle and Eddie. They fought at Mania with Eddie loosening his boot so Kurt couldn’t grip it for the ankle lock, leading to a roll up for the pin. Angle then was chokeslammed from a balcony, breaking his leg. He was upset that he had a real injury and Eddie faked one, and says that Eddie has to cheat to beat him.

Angle, the GM of Smackdown at the time, screwed Eddie out of the title in a cage match, so Eddie was pissed. That leads us here, and it really doesn’t sound that good when I think about it.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Luther Reigns, who did nothing at all, is with Kurt here. Eddie comes out in the lowrider, which I’ve always hated. What’s the point of it anyway? Oh look I have a car that can bounce. Yeah that’s really cool. Cole calls Angle a former Grand Slam Winner. For one thing, does that sounds like he won an eating competition at a Denny’s? Either way, how can he be a former winner of it? If he’s won it once, he’s always won it right?

They do a nice technical sequence to start with neither guy being able to hold an advantage for that long. Eddie even goes for the ankle in a nice touch. Angle gets a key lock on Eddie, which Tazz corrects Cole for calling an armbar. As Eddie is getting up, Tazz calls it an armbar. You have to love the thought process sometimes of Tazz, or his lack thereof. Angle finally ends this friendly natured competition with a German, but Eddie gets a full ankle lock on which just looks weird.

Angle counters and hits the slam, then his own ankle lock. In a cool looking spot, Eddie grabs his ankle and for a few seconds, both have ankle locks on the other. Eddie’s is broken though as he apparently has a titanium leg, because being in the hold for about a minute won’t make him tap. There’s having heart, and then there’s just being stupid. This is the latter.

Oh the straps were pulled down inside of 5 minutes. This has been like an Angle match in fast forward. They go to the mat…again. This is like a bad MMA fight where they’re just laying on each other the whole time and no one really does anything. The fans are just completely dead for it as even I’m getting drowsy. Seriously, they’ve been wrestling for about ten minutes and at least 7 of that has been submission holds.

Eddie has a spot whispered to him by Angle, who for no apparent reason has unlaced Eddie’s boot, which in theory would help his ankle by letting it loosen up a bit, but what do I know? Eddie hits a belly to back suplex to get out of another chinlock, but because he’s facing Angle, it’s called an Angle slam. I can’t stand that. Why is it that when anyone else does it it’s an average move, but when Angle does it it’s devastating?

The same holds true for a lot of people. JBL used a hard clothesline which the Steiners did for years, Jericho has a Boston Crab which is a bad example because it never beats anyone, and Lawler uses a fist. Why are these moves so devastating? It’s not like you’re going to get better at them with a lot of practice or strength like the chokeslam or a power bomb.

Anyway, Eddie comes back with punches and the third one is just after his stupid dance, so naturally the power behind it triples. Benoit is ripped off even more by the snap suplexes followed by Eddie going up for the splash. Angle does the run up the ropes belly to belly which is just flat out cool. Luther is shown and my theory that he’s completely pointless is confirmed as he hit Eddie once about 10 minutes ago and this is the first we’ve seen of him since.

After Angle hits a thumb to the eye, which Cole would make you think was a .45 caliber bullet to the face, Angle gets the boot completely off to expose the sock covered ankle. He gets the ankle lock on for about the 12th time after getting up from a frog splash to get Eddie to tap out. Seriously, Reigns was completely worthless here.

Rating: C-. This was just flat out boring for the first 8-10 minutes as it was nothing, and I mean nothing but submission holds. Now that’s fine in theory, but DANG it just got boring after awhile. It was nothing but chinlocks, headlocks and ankle locks. Now once they stopped doing that it got miles better but prior to that it was just flat out horrid.

The dozen ankle locks didn’t help either as it just got stupid after awhile. It made the hold look very weak as Eddie held on for probably three minutes total in it without ever giving up. It just didn’t work at all for me and while others would think it was great, this wasn’t good for me.

We recap HHH vs. Eugene. This is why this era from the WWE is looked down on so much. We have probably the best stable since the NWO and their leader is fighting a guy who is a bit slow. Anyway, this was actually a pretty creative storyline in my eyes.

Eugene was a guy that was a wrestling savant, meaning that while he had no actual training or anything of the sort, he had learned from watching wrestling for many years, and then got trained (on camera) by Regal, making him into a complete wrestler. In reality, Eugene was played by Nick Dinsmore who was a very talented technical wrestler. He’s the undisputed god of OVW, having won the heavyweight title 9 times and the tag titles 10 times or something like that.

Think of Lawler in Memphis kind of. Anyway, Eugene was saved by the Rock when people were making fun of him and he said that HHH was his favorite wrestler. Instead of HHH getting someone competent to help him though, he enlists Eugene as an honorary member of Evolution on a night where Eugene was guest GM.

Eugene booked Benoit vs. HHH for Vengeance for the WHC, which Eugene accidentally cost HHH. He then beat up Regal, who was Eugene’s mentor. That leads us here. The problem here is simple though: at the end of the day, while that storyline at least sounds good, IT’S STILL HHH VS. EUGENE!

HHH vs. Eugene

I now remember why I hate Eugene: you can never get his song out of your head once you hear it. It’s freaking addictive. Why does the annoying character have to be from Kentucky? Oh yeah and Eugene is freakishly strong. In case you don’t remember don’t worry, the announcers will tell you every 38 seconds. HHH shoves Lillian down so Eugene helps her up but gets beaten on for his trouble.

HHH fakes a knee injury, prompting the referee to throw up the fake X. It’s pretty good I think though, as it is pretty good as a way to fool the marks in the audience. HHH jumps Eugene and immediately the crowd starts cheering him, which Lawler and Ross try to pass off as just due to the Canadian fans being bizarre. The thing that I forgot to mention was that the fans absolutely hated Eugene.

The problem was simple: he was used WAY too much. When he debuted he was a character that a lot of people actually liked. It was something that hadn’t been done this well before and the fact that he was actually a very good worker helped things a lot as well. The problem was that they screwed it up the same way they screwed up Santino.

He’s fine in small doses, maybe once a week, but there was a Raw where Eugene was in 6 separate segments and the fans just got sick of the sight of him. His character was never meant to be involved in serious storylines but they did it anyway. The WWE formula has long since been if a little bit of something works, then a lot of it will work a lot better, which simply isn’t the case and hardly ever is.

It certainly wasn’t here, and it never clicked in the WWE’s eyes. They blamed Eugene for not being able to get over, since the booking of WWE can never be wrong can it? Either way, it bombed bad after this, even to the point of them trying to turn him heel, which also failed completely. You can tell HHH is younger here. He’s only an eight time world champion. Eugene does other people’s moves, such as the Rock Bottom.

He goes for the People’s Elbow, but HHH has had enough of this bull of stealing moves, and he lets Eugene know about it by nailing him with a AA spinebuster. Lawler gets in a good line about Eugene: he wasn’t even his mother’s favorite and he’s an only child. I forgot to mention: Eugene is Bischoff’s nephew which is why he’s around at all. Eugene actually Hulks Up before flipping HHH off and stunning him as the fans are cheering for some guy named boo.

Flair comes out as Eugene kicks HHH in the face and drops a leg on him. This is stupider than words can describe. He even gets a pedigree but Flair saves him. The referee throws Flair out and Regal nails him with knuckles. HHH takes the time to hit the pedigree and end this finally.

Rating: D. Again, it comes down to this: HHH IS BEATING UP EUGENE! The fans hated him, the match was too long, it’s not believable, and the feud was just bad. It was complete overkill for the character and after this, aside from a tag title run that ended in injury, he never did anything else in WWE. This was just a waste of 15 minutes and I can’t believe this was all they could come up with for HHH.

Diva Dodge Ball

Yes, it’s the girls from the Diva Search, most of whom got hired, against the established divas in a game of dodge ball at the Raptors’ practice facility. Oh and look they’re all wearing bras and shorts.

Here are the rosters if you’re interested: Amy Weber, Joy Giovanni, Tracie Wright (never hired), Maria (hot as a dirty blonde), Christy and Michelle (pre boob job) vs. Victoria, Gail Kim, Jazz, Stacy, Molly and Nidia. That right there shows how stupid the Diva Search was. All but one of the 6 finalists got jobs anyway. Apparently Trish is the captain. The Diva Search girls win.

Rating: F-. This was a waste of time and was for 12 year olds. I hate stuff like this. They actually wasted 5 minutes on this, and yet we get no recap for the Smackdown title match.

Smackdown World Title: JBL vs. Undertaker

We get literally no backstory here as they say these two are having a match and then the lights go out. Yeah that’s great guys. Basically, Taker just said he wanted a title shot and got one. This was just after JBL had won the belt so I think this was his first feud as champion. No one, and I mean no one, bought him as champion because literally this is how it went: Eddie wins title, JBL debuts as the rich guy, challenges, challenges again, wins title.

There was no buildup to his character at all. He had been Bradshaw for years now and all of a sudden he’s a self made millionaire and apparently has been for many years? Yeah, we’re just going to believe that I guess. It was just completely from left field and no one wanted to see him as top heel and it followed him for years as a stigma about him, which I think was unfair and should be blamed more on the bookers.

Until this, his career highlight was 6 days or so as European Champion, and now he’s challenging for the world title as a DiBiase rip off? Starting to see why this didn’t work for about two years? Taker’s entrance as always is awesome as he more or less walks through a tunnel of fire. Apparently JBL attacked Taker on Smackdown a few days ago. Thanks for that great story Cole. Taker is back to the Dead Man now.

JBL still has the big white limp with the horns. He’s accompanied by Orlando Jordan, somehow even more of a waste of space. I think I hate Nick Patrick. He’s just annoying as a referee. JBL is wearing orange/red tights that are just a complete and utter failure. Tazz says he’s not sure how to beat the Undertaker. I thought a pin would work fine but maybe there are separate rules for him. JBL actually goes up top and hits a flying shoulder block that looked pretty good.

Old School connects, which actually is vintage, and Cole reminds us of that. Jordan gets kicked in the head but JBL gets a shot into the knee to end any offense that Taker was on. The fans start doing the wave. I don’t know if that’s a cultural thing, but I’ve always found it rude. It’s not like the match is terrible or anything. If I’m one of the guys in the ring, then I don’t like the fact that the fans are apparently not interested in my match but are interested in throwing their hands up for no apparent reason.

JBL hits the clothesline and of course Taker kicks out of it since that move just completely sucks. Since this is a Taker match, the referee gets bumped and since it’s Nick Patrick, he stays down for about two days. In between we have all kinds of interference and finishers, including a standard clothesline that is called the finisher, which stuns Cole that Taker more or less pops up from it. Well DUH.

Taker does the power bomb out of the corner spot that he beat HHH with at Mania 17, but as he goes for the tombstone, Jordan tries to hit him with the belt. Taker does it instead and the referee wakes up just in time to DQ him. Post match, we get the best spot of the show as Taker beats JBL onto the limo then chokeslams him through the roof.

The spot is ok, but it’s great because it led to one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen that I wish I could find a picture of. JBL is in a halo and more or less has his hat tied to his head. It’s funnier than it sounds.

Rating: B-. This was ok I guess, although I think everyone knew Taker wouldn’t get the title off of JBL immediately. There was a rematch two months later at No Mercy that was ok I suppose. This feud was just filler until Cena was truly ready to go, so nothing of note happened here. It was fine though.

Wrestlemania 21 is in LA.

Raw World Title-Randy Orton vs. Chris Benoit

At the time, Orton was doing the thing where he was like look at me and bow to my greatness. He won a battle royal to get this shot, but that’s not important enough to be told. Fink has mic issues, which Jerry plays off by saying that even Fink is choked up. Ok so they do cover the battle royal thing, but dang did they take long enough? Benoit of course gets a huge pop. I think Lawler has a crush on Orton.

He says that Orton could be a model for statues. Dang Jerry just go blow him already. Test of strength is more or less a tossup. The first good part of this match is these two using all kinds of wrestling holds. It’s very interesting to see Orton working very well on the mat as that’s certainly not something you see from him very often. Granted it may be Benoit making him look good, but at least Randy is capitalizing on it.

Benoit hooks the Sharpshooter and you’d think everyone had been given money, food and sex. Good lord they blew up over it. It’s countered and Benoit’s shoulder is hurt, so the VIPER strikes on it. Did you know Orton is a viper now? Not sure if that caught on, but Orton is a viper! This is a good back and forth match so far. Benoit hits the suicide dive to the floor but Orton moves.

Benoit slams into the wall in an absolutely sick looking spot. I don’t know if that was planned or not but if not then goodness. Actually if yes then goodness as well. It’s time to chinlock it up as every Orton match comes complete with one. It’s like the toy in a Happy Meal, just not as entertaining. They do a double cross body, which looks awesome too. These two can work really well together actually. They go back and forth even longer and another Sharpshooter is put on.

Oddly enough there’s been limited Crossface attempts. However, I think that’s the best way to go as it wouldn’t make sense for Benoit to try it. Why should he? He’s worked the back and knees all match so why would he, a thinking wrestler, go for the neck and shoulder? He doesn’t and to me that’s a sign of a great wrestler. Finishing moves are fine, but they should make sense.

That’s one thing Ric Flair was always great at. Watch his matches and his offense, or at least 90% of it is either basic offense or working on the legs. That makes such perfect sense and it fits that he uses it like that. He never focused on the neck or back or anything like that, and he shouldn’t have. Benoit goes up and tries the headbutt, but Orton I think tries to roll out of the way.

Either way, the top of his head rams into Benoit’s head and it just looked painful. Just as soon as I type that big long rant about how smart Benoit is, we get the crossface, which I guess I see why that is done in this case because nothing else has worked, so he puts it on him and cranks for all he’s got as a last ditch effort.

Anyway, Orton gets the ropes and in one of my favorite finishes ever, Benoit tries for the Crossface again but Orton gets behind him and nails the RKO for the quick pin and the title. If it tells you anything about the match, the fans give them a standing ovation. The look on Orton’s face is just perfect as he’s completely stunned and it looks like he’s saying did I really just do that? Lawler’s orgasm could stop a drought.

Orton celebrates with the title as Benoit comes back in. He sticks out his hand and shouts for Orton to be a man. Orton shakes his hand as Benoit’s music plays us out. To be fair, he leaves and lets Orton be alone in the ring as he should be. The problem here though is the next night they had another great match for free on Raw. That match still haunts us today though, as it officially kicked off HHH vs. Randy Orton.

Yes, that was the night where Orton was kicked out of Evolution. Note: THAT WAS FIVE YEARS AGO, and they’re still feuding. The whole cool moment was wasted too, as Orton had the title a mere four weeks, losing his first title defense to, who else, HHH at Unforgiven.

HHH would hold it until Mania where he would drop it to Batista. I hate that as it’s more of HHH dominating the belt while another young guy has a short feud after being built up as the young phenom so well, but that’s Raw booking in 04 for you.

Rating: A. This was a great match. They were back and forth the whole time and while I don’t think anyone expected Orton to win, I think it fit really well as Benoit just couldn’t beat him no matter how hard he tried. It made Orton look like the better man and that’s how it should have been done. This is a very good match that you should check out if you haven’t seen it before.

Overall Rating: C+. This show is really up and down all night between decent stuff and flat out boring stuff. The main event is by far the best match of the show, but that’s not really a surprise. Eddie and Angle is something I definitely could see going either way but it just didn’t do it in my case.

JBL and Taker I thought was good but not great. The opening two matches were good enough, but HHH and Eugene along with the divas thing were just horrid to say the least. I’ll recommend it, but have a remote ready to fast forward some stuff.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – March 5, 2007: He Had A Good Reason

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 5, 2007
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and for once, the build is actually clicking really well. There is a lot of focus on the Battle of the Billionaires, which is hardly the most thrilling story due to the people involved, but just about everything else has my interest. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

John Cena comes up to Shawn Michaels in the back (to a THUNDEROUS CENA chant) and asks what is up with Shawn. Michaels says he isn’t going to turn on him, but Cena wants some more reassurance. What makes this one so different? Shawn: “I don’t know. Maybe it’s not.” Cena has Shawn’s back tonight, but Shawn says he doesn’t need it. That’s not cool with Cena, who will have Shawn’s back. Shawn says he doesn’t want or need Cena’s help and walks off.

Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Edge is here with Orton, who punches Shawn down to start. That doesn’t last long, as Shawn is back up with a clothesline out to the floor. Back in and Orton punches him down a few more times, followed by a rather evil rake to the eyes. Orton sends him crashing out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Orton holding a pretty bad Boston crab and Shawn teasing the tap until he makes it over to the rope.

Shawn is back up with a crossbody for two but Orton drops him hard with the hanging DDT. A dropkick sets up the chinlock, which draws Shawn back to his feet for the chops. The atomic drop into the slam sets up the top rope elbow but Sweet Chin Music is countered into the RKO attempt, which is countered with a shove into the referee. Orton hits a clothesline and Edge throws in a title, but the referee intercepts the belt. That’s enough for Shawn to grab a rollup for the fast pin.

Rating: B-. It’s two main eventers getting some time and having a story to set up the match. That’s going to work every time and it was one of the better Raw matches in recent memory as a result. I liked what we got here and you know something else is going to happen after the match to make things that much better. Rather good opener here, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Post match Edge throws in a chair, with Orton laying Shawn out with an RKO. Cue John Cena for the late save.

We recap Bobby Lashley destroying the cage to crush Umaga on ECW.

Vince McMahon asks Armando Alejandro Estrada what kind of mood Umaga is in tonight against Jeff Hardy. Estrada has something planned and leaves. Coach thinks Vince is worried about the guest referee being named for the Battle of the Millionaires. Vince of course isn’t, because he has made a suggestion, as Chairman of the Board: Shane McMahon.

Intercontinental Title: Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy

Umaga, with Armando Alejandro Estrada, is defending. Hardy avoids an early charge in the corner and they sent outside where Umaga gets dropkicked off the steps. Back in and Umaga blasts him with a clothesline before cannonballing down onto Hardy’s chest. Hardy tries to fight up and gets clotheslined down again, meaning it’s time to go into the Tree of Woe. The running headbutt knocks Hardy silly and it’s the running hip attack into the Samoan Spike to retain the title.

Rating: C-. Total squash here for the most part and that’s what it should have been. Umaga has jumped up the ladder and he should be squashing Hardy at the moment. It did what it was supposed to do and is going to make Bobby Lashley look that much better when he can go toe to toe with Umaga.

We recap Bobby Lashley’s week: brawling with Umaga on Raw, beating Hardcore Holly on ECW and turning down Vince McMahon’s offer to jump on Smackdown.

Some low level celebrities and John Travolta give their picks on the Battle of the Billionaires. Travolta does not seem to have any idea what he is being asked about.

Ric Flair and Carlito are in a Money in the Bank qualifying match tonight and Flair is very confident that he’s winning tonight and at Wrestlemania. Flair: “Why? Because I can. WOO!”

Shane McMahon calls Vince McMahon and thinks the Board of Directors votes how Vince wants. More later.

Here is Jim Duggan to take the Masterlock Challenge. The hold goes on, Duggan is in trouble, the fans chant USA, Duggan can’t fight out, Masters wins. This is about two minutes of the show.

We recap Shawn Michaels getting beaten down until John Cena made the late save.

Shawn isn’t happy with Cena, but will still have his back tonight. Cena doesn’t seem impressed.

Here is Vince McMahon for the announcement about the guest referee. Before we get to that though, Vince has an announcement: next week, Donald Trump will be here to sign the contract for Wrestlemania. If Trump gets out of line, it is going to be the McMahon B**** Slap. As for the guest referee…..here is Eric Bischoff. Don’t worry though because he isn’t the guest referee, but he does live in Phoenix. We hear about the garbage truck firing and Bischoff can’t wait to see Vince bald.

Bischoff leaves and Vince wants the guest referee….so here is Mick Foley in a referee shirt. Vince: “How are the kids?” Vince is clearly nervous and seems to hint at a bribe, but Mick would rather have his old job back. That’s granted, but Mick also wants unlimited access to pop in and plug his new book, the Hardcore Diaries. Oh and could Vince pick up his room service bill, including an adult double feature? Sure on that too, but Foley isn’t the referee for Wrestlemania. He’s the referee for a rib eating contest between Charles Barkley and the Phoenix Suns Gorilla.

Cue the Gorilla so Vince throws them both out as Shane McMahon comes out to replace them. Vince is thrilled, but Shane says they lost. Vince: “If you’re not the guest referee…..” And cue the glass shatter, giving us an all time Vince Face with the Wrestlemania sign behind him. Steve Austin comes out, hits the buckles, won’t shake Vince’s hand, and drinks a lot. He does throw some beer on Vince for old times’ sake and the fans are very pleased. As usual, Austin knows when he doesn’t have to do anything more than the classics without saying a word. The fake referees were great too, with Austin being a perfect payoff.

Post break, Foley leaves with the Gorilla, giving Ron Simmons something to swear about.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Melina

Melina is defending, Falls Count Anywhere, and Ashley is guest ring announcer. As luck would have it, Lawler has Ashley’s Playboy, with the expected reactions. They waste no time in brawling to the back with Mickie tossing her over a makeup table. Now it’s time to go into the women’s locker room, with Lawler demanding wider camera angles. Victoria goes after Mickie but Torrie Wilson hairsprays Melina in the face. Candice Michelle pops up in a towel, which is ripped off in a hurry.

They head back into the arena and the ring with Mickie throwing her around by the hair over and over. Melina is sat on top for a super hurricanrana but holds on, leaving Mickie to crash ONTO HER HEAD, allowing Melina to get the pin. That was terrifying and I would hope not how it was planned.

Rating: D+. Well that was completely terrifying and not something I ever need to see again. Mickie crashed down hard and thankfully they got straight to the pin after that. The Falls Count Anywhere stuff was little more than a way to feature some of the other women and Ashley’s Playboy gets another plug. I don’t know how much the match mattered, but that is often the case with the title.

Post match Melina goes to yell at Ashley, who shoves her down. Ashley helps Mickie to her feet, which is quite the relief.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Carlito vs. Ric Flair

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito. Flair gets backed into the corner to start and stomps away until Flair chops his way to freedom. Carlito knocks him down again though and stomps away, setting up a snap suplex for two. The left hands are rained down so Flair chops away even more. The knee drop gets two and Flair grabs a chinlock. That’s broken up as well, allowing Carlito to hit the springboard back elbow….and here is Great Khali to jump them both. There is no bell so we’ll call that a no contest, meaning no winner.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to do much but it wasn’t going to be very good in the first place. The story works well enough but it isn’t like this is a great idea. Flair as a mentor to Carlito is still a little weird, but so is barely having Carlito ever win anything. I’d assume one turns on the other in the end, though that could take some time.

Post match Khali says he wants Kane.

Here’s the Steve Austin appearance again.

Austin will be on ECW.

The newest Hall of Fame inductee is…..Nick Bockwinkel. That would be this year’s “how is he not in already” entrant.

Randy Orton makes it very clear to Edge: he does NOT have his back tonight.

John Cena vs. Edge

Non-title….and non-Edge at first as MNM comes out instead. Cue Edge to say he is a civil rights activist (yes) and since Arizona was one of the last states to recognize Martin Luther King Jr. Day, something needs to be done. Johnny Nitro’s great great grandmother was Black so he’s getting to face Cena instead. I really was not expecting that one so well done….maybe?

John Cena vs. Johnny Nitro

Non-title with the rest of MNM and Edge at ringside. Nitro kicks him down to start and sends him outside, where Mercury gets in a posting. Cena goes into the steps and it’s a chinlock to keep him down back inside. That’s broken up with raw power and Cena starts the clothesline comeback. The ProtoBomb into the Shuffle means Cena has to knock Edge off the apron. The AA is broken up by Mercury for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Another match that didn’t have time to go anywhere and was only there to set something up going forward. Edge’s line to get out of the match was completely out there, but it worked well for the kind of coward that he can be. Barely a match of course, but Nitro isn’t feeling like a complete accident in these roles anymore.

Post match the beatdown, including the Snapshot, is on. Cue Shawn Michaels, who teases running in for the save but turns around….only to run in and save Cena. Now it’s Cena’s change to be confused to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t very good here outside of the opener but the Steve Austin surprise worked well. They have the card set and now it is time to hammer things home. There are still a few weeks to go until Wrestlemania so hopefully the feuds have been mapped out well. Otherwise you run out of ideas in a hurry and the last few weeks are awful. Not a great show here, but Wrestlemania is looking strong.

 

 

 

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Main Event – July 29, 2021: So Much For All That

Main Event
Date: July 29, 2021
Location: T-Mobile Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Byron Saxton

The fans are back, but unfortunately it seems that the changes that had been taken place around here are not. Last week felt a lot like the Main Event days of old, which is far from exciting news. Normally I would say that I’m not surprised, but I really can’t say I am with this show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Drew Gulak

Ryker powers him into the corner to start so Gulak does it to him as well. Gulak’s slap to the face doesn’t seem to be the best idea as Ryker is back with a spinning slam. We hit the armbar on Gulak as we hear about Ryker’s military career again. Gulak switches into a cravate to hold Ryker down and it’s off to a cross arm choke. Ryker powers up into some ax handles to the chest and a release slingshot suplex drops Gulak again. The swinging Boss Man Slam finishes Gulak at 5:17.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would have expected from these two and that is not a great thing. Gulak is great at the technical stuff but Ryker is as generic of a power guy as you can find. Nothing to see here, but what else were they going to do in a five minute Main Event opener?

From Smackdown.

We start fast this week with John Cena starting us off in a hurry. He talks about how hyped up the fans are here and knows that Roman Reigns is coming. There is some sports news coming out of Cleveland today, which is why he has changed his middle name to Guardians (as did Cleveland’s baseball team). He has to protect the little respect that WWE has left because Roman Reigns is terrible as Universal Champion. We’re back live and that means we are on the way to Summerslam, which is a place for the fans to show what they believe in. Whose team are you on?

That gives us a loud CENA chant, so he asks if you’re on Team Jorts or Team Cargo Pants? Team Hustle, Loyalty and Respect or on a team no one respects? Cena wants to know where Reigns is, because at Summerslam, Reigns can’t see him. Let’s get Reigns out here, but here is Paul Heyman (McAfee: “Legend.”) instead. Heyman says Reigns isn’t coming out here, but Cena will get an answer tonight. Then, Cena will know that the Tribal Chief is here. Heyman then does You Can’t See Me and sings (I guess?) the tune of Cena’s song in something you have to see to appreciate/believe. Both guys were amazing here.

From Smackdown.

Here is Roman Reigns to answer John Cena’s challenge. The fans don’t seem thrilled to see him but he demands to be acknowledged. Cena acknowledged him at Money in the Bank but Reigns did not expect to see it. Reigns was expecting a new Cena but it was the same music, the same run to the ring, the same catchphrases and the same everything, just like it was 2005. Reigns: “It’s like missionary position. The same thing every day!”

That’s not how we do it at the head of the table and that’s not what we’re doing at Summerslam. The answer is no (makes sense, as Bobby Lashley said the same thing to Goldberg this week), but here is Finn Balor of all people to interrupt. Reigns wants Balor to acknowledge him, but that’s not why Balor is here. If Reigns says no to Cena’s challenge, how about Balor instead? Fans: “ROMAN’S SCARED!” Reigns: “Challenge accepted.”

We look back at Goldberg returning and challenging Bobby Lashley for Summerslam.

From Raw.

Here are Bobby Lashley and MVP to respond to Goldberg’s challenge (which Lashley already did on Twitter last week). MVP recaps the challenge and asks Lashley for his answer. Lashley isn’t going to dignify that with a response, but says this is his ring. Cue Cedric Alexander to say he didn’t like the disrespect when Lashley broke up the Hurt Business. Now it’s Shelton Benjamin coming out to say Alexander’s voice is annoying before challenging Lashley as well. Lashley says he’ll fight them both at once.

Bobby Lashley vs. Cedric Alexander/Shelton Benjamin

Non-title and Lashley runs them over to start. Cedric is sent outside, leaving Lashley to go after Benjamin. Back in and Cedric trips Lashley up, allowing Benjamin to hit a running knee. A springboard tornado DDT plants Lashley for a double two but he is back up with the spinebuster to Alexander. The spear cuts Benjamin down and it’s a Jackhammer to plant him again. The Dominator puts Alexander onto Benjamin for the double pin at 2:44.

Angel Garza vs. Humberto Carrillo

Again. Garza bails to the floor to start to give a fan his rose before heading back inside. That’s fine with Carrillo as he grabs a headlock but hold on as Garza teases….something as we take a break. Back with Garza ripping at the face and grabbing a waistlock. That’s broken up in a hurry and Carrillo is back with the springboard spinning crossbody for two. Carrillo grabs a chinlock before kicking Garza in the face for two more.

The abdominal stretch lets Carrillo pound away at the ribs but Garza slips out. A flapjack gives Garza two of his own and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence. Carrillo headscissors him down and rolls backwards into a standing moonsault for two. Garza superkicks him out of the air, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 8:13.

Rating: C. The more you look at these things, the more confusing it is to see Carrillo getting pushed over Garza. It has never made sense as Garza is overflowing with charisma. Maybe the whole ladies man thing is slowing him down, but it’s a lot better than Carrillo being the generic smiling guy. Carrillo is very smooth in the ring, but you need something more than that, which he is lacking.

We recap Nikki Ash winning the Women’s Title with the Money in the Bank contract.

From Raw.

Here is Nikki Ash to get things going. She finally gets to welcome us to Raw and talks about how she didn’t believe she could get here. Nikki has worked to get here and once she finally started believing in herself, she accomplished her goals. If she can do it, everyone can do it and we can all be almost superheroes. Cue Charlotte to talk about how last week wasn’t fair and she is getting her rematch at Summerslam. Charlotte knows that everyone is tired of having people better than them around but they need to get used to it.

Cue Rhea Ripley, now smiling and high fiving (a few) fans. Ripley talks about how Charlotte only held the title for a day and promising to win the title herself. Nikki asks why she is being left out and here are Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to interrupt. The triple threat match is on, and we’ll throw in Nikki vs. Charlotte tonight as well. Charlotte jumps Ripley but gets knocked outside by Nikki, who stands tall. This didn’t do much about making Nikki feel important.

From Raw.

Charlotte vs. Nikki Ash

Non-title and Charlotte chops her into the corner to start. Charlotte goes after the mask and chokes on the ropes to keep Nikki in trouble. Nikki is sent outside, allowing Charlotte to ask if this is your champion. Back in and Nikki’s comeback is cut off in a hurry, as Charlotte fires off more chops. Some rollups give Nikki two each and a headscissors sends Charlotte outside. There’s a dropkick through the ropes but Charlotte throws her over the announcers’ table as we take a break.

Back with Nikki still in trouble so Charlotte can grab the chinlock. Nikki fights up and hits a quick crossbody for a breather so Charlotte misses a bit boot. The leg is snapped across the top but she blocks the sunset flip without much effort. There’s a bulldog for two on Charlotte but she chops Nikki into the corner. Nikki is sat on top, only to come back with a tornado DDT. Charlotte rolls through the high crossbody though and pins Nikki at 12:33.

Rating: D. What is there to say here? Nikki is trying to be a star and gets beaten down, with Charlotte selling absolutely nothing for most of the match. I’d like to think that this leads to Cross overcoming the odds at Summerslam and retaining, but that isn’t going to matter if this is what happens to her on the way. This was a long form squash and Charlotte reminded us of that every chance she could.

Post match Charlotte laughs at Nikki and grabs a mic to say no one is in her league. Nikki grabs the mic and says she knows she lost but she showed she ALMOST could have won. Therefore, Charlotte gets a rematch next week. Charlotte accepts and beats Nikki down again, yells some more, and drops her one more time to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Egads Raw is terrible. That’s the big story I got out of this, which says a lot when this is supposed to be the big highlight package show. Smackdown isn’t great but it’s better than Raw, which isn’t saying all that much. I would say hopefully Raw is going to get better but I think we can forget about that for the next….oh I’m thinking years or so at this point. Bad show, with Raw dragging things down even further.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 30, 2021: It’s Moving Day

Smackdown
Date: July 30, 2021
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We’re less than a month away from Summerslam and things have been getting interesting around here again. Last week, John Cena challenged Roman Reigns for Summerslam. That was a no, but Finn Balor issued his own challenge and got a yes. There is no word on when that takes place, but it should be pretty soon. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. We look at a recap of last week with Reigns, Cena and Balor, complete with Reigns’ missionary position line. Cena: “If you can find someone who can keep missionary position interesting for two decades, keep them in your life. It’s going to be worth it, I promise.” Cena talks about how he isn’t going to change anything and it wouldn’t make sense. Steve Austin wouldn’t come back as Sasquatch Steve Houston, or the Rock wouldn’t come back as Too Small Johnson.

Cena: “Roman Reigns has to change every two years because if he doesn’t, people stop caring about him.” Reigns is a guy named Joe, who gets by on every gimmick and is too scared to fail. He refused to fight Cena because of how Cena looks, but it’s really because of how Cena makes him look.

Cue Baron Corbin, but Cena doesn’t even recognize him. Cena: “DUDE! YOU LOOK….” Corbin: “Horrible, I know.” Corbin talks about everything that has gone wrong with him, and now he has had his identity stolen. On top of that, he has suffered an injury to a personal area and can’t perform. His wife took the kids and left, but maybe Cena can help him.

Cena asks the fans if he should help him, and Cena hands him some cash. Corbin: “THAT’S IT???” Corbin asks for a part in the Suicide Squad, but Cena says it’s already wrapped. Cena: “It come out next Friday. Make sure you go see it!” Corbin begs some more so Cena gives him the AA. Cena was feeling it here with the mixture of comedy and bombs on Reigns. The Corbin stuff is still great too, though how much more can happen to him?

We look at the Usos taking the Tag Team Titles from the Mysterios.

Dominik Mysterio tells Rey Mysterio he’ll have his back tonight. Rey says keep an eye on him and another eye on the Usos. They have to step it up to get the titles back.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jimmy Uso

Dominik and Jey Uso are here too. Rey sends him into the corner to start and hammers away, setting up the bulldog for two. Jimmy is sent outside but avoids the dive, setting up the superkick to drop Rey. We take a break and come back with Rey kicking Jimmy in the head for a breather. Rey gets sent to the apron and an enziguri drops him again. Back up and Jimmy is sent outside, setting up the slingshot corkscrew dive to take out both Usos. Rey tries the 619 but Jimmy catches him in the fireman’s carry. That’s reversed into a crucifix, with Dominik adding the assist for the pin at 7:58.

Rating: C-. Quick match here to get the Mysterios some momentum to get them ready for their next title match. It makes sense to have Dominik do something like that at the end too, as you can only have him doing the same stuff for so long. It wasn’t a great match or even close to one, but it did what it was supposed to do.

We look back at Bianca Belair retaining the Women’s Title over Carmella at the Rolling Loud festival last week. Even McAfee has to acknowledge how the fans didn’t care.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. She is so proud of her 111 day Women’s Title reign and now she is happy to be back in front of these people. Belair can’t wait to see what the next 100 days have….and here is Carmella to cut her off. Carmella thinks she should get another shot because the lighting at Rolling Loud was messing her up.

Cue Zelina Vega to say Carmella is too pretty to be a three time loser. Vega gets in Belair’s face to say the people want to see a rising star get a chance. Belair accepts the challenge but Carmella jumps her from behind. Cue the returning Sasha Banks (not for the first time since Wrestlemania McAfee) for the save and a big hug to Belair. That’s probably Summerslam.

Video on Reginald winning the 24/7 Title.

Reginald talks about doing whatever he needs to do to retain the title. He has been looking everywhere for someone coming after him, even getting a camera on his shopping cart. The title is on the line tonight and while he doesn’t know who is challenging him, they should expect the unexpected.

24/7 Title: Reginald vs. Chad Gable

Gable, with Otis, is challenging and Otis jumps Reginald before the bell. A bridging northern lights suplex gets two on Reginald but he bounces around to avoid the chops. Instead, Gable tiger suplexes him for two but Reginald flips out of a German superplex. Gable is set into the corner to set up the running flipping seated senton, drawing Otis in for the DQ at 1:38.

Post match Reginald is thrown outside but sticks the landing to escape.

Sonya Deville announces Carmella/Zelina Vega vs. Sasha Banks/Bianca Belair for tonight.

It’s time for the contract signing between Roman Reigns and Finn Balor for Summerslam. Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce are in charge, with Pearce saying he knows the fighting is coming. Balor and Reigns, with Heyman, come out, with Reigns insisting on sitting at the head of the table. Pearce asks Reigns to sign, but Reign gets cut off by the CENA chants. Reigns: “We’ve already seen Mr. Missionary tonight.” Reigns asks if Balor heard Cena’s opening promo tonight, because Reigns thought it was Cena saying he was better than Balor. Cena has to use old material while Balor is fresh and new.

Reigns signs, but promises to send Balor back to NXT. Balor says he can’t wait to go back to NXT as Universal Champion again. Balor goes to sign but here is Baron Corbin to jump him from behind. The beating is on and Balor is left laying. Corbin grabs the contract but here is Cena to take Corbin out before he can sign. Cena signs the contract with a blue Sharpie (McAfee: “THAT SIGNATURE IS AWESOME!”). Cole and McAfee question the legality of signing a contract like this as Reigns seethes.

Post break, Paul Heyman asks what Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville are going to do about Summerslam because that contract situation doesn’t work. They look at the contract, which says Summerslam and has Reigns and Cena’s signatures. That’s good enough for them, so the match is on.

Big E./Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro vs. Apollo Crews/Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Commander Azeez is here with the villains. Rick Boogs handles the intro and McAfee dances as usual. Crews sends Big E. outside in a hurry and it’s a spinebuster/Zig Zag combination to send us to an early break. Back with Big E. getting over for the hot tag to Cesaro, who Swings Ziggler in a hurry. The Sharpshooter is broken up so Nakamura comes in to kick Ziggler down for two.

Kinshasa is countered with a Sling Blade but Ziggler can’t cover. He can however bring in Crews for a standing moonsault to Nakamura. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of secondary finishers. Azeez tries to interfere but Boogs distracts him with the guitar. The distraction is enough for Nakamura to Kinshasa Crwes for the pin at 6:45.

Rating: C. This was a bunch of people not getting a ton of time, but it probably sets up (at least one of) Crews’ next challenger for the title. A big multiman match of some sort wouldn’t surprise me, and at least in this case they have set part of it up. At least they got to the point here without wasting a lot of time, so this could have been a lot worse.

We look at Edge brawling with Seth Rollins last week.

Here is Edge for a chat….but it’s Rollins in the ring when we come back from a break. Rollins attacked Edge during the break, including a camera shot to the face. Rollins rants about how he had to do that and throws us to a video on his history with Edge. He should be the Universal Champion, but if he can’t be, neither can Edge.

We recap the contract signing.

Next week: Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin.

Sasha Banks/Bianca Belair vs. Carmella/Zelina Vega

Belair and Carmella start fast by running Carmella over. Carmella gets in a few shots on Banks in the corner as everything breaks down. They all head outside with Belair gorilla pressing Banks, climbing onto the steps, and then throwing her onto the other two. We take a break and come back with Belair fighting out of a full nelson but getting slammed down anyway.

Carmella stomps away in the corner and Vega cuts off another hot tag attempt. Vega’s Black Widow is broken up in a hurry and the hot tag brings in Banks. House is cleaned, including Three Amigos to Vega. The frog splash gets two with Carmella making the save. Carmella’s X Factor is countered into the Bank Statement for the tap at 8:42.

Rating: C. Just a quick match to get Banks back in the ring with a win. I’m not sure I buy the idea that Banks is going to be Belair’s new best friend, but that is one of the two default stories for women in WWE these days. Hopefully this gets rid of Carmella from the title picture for the time being, as that has been done for a while now.

Belair and Banks celebrate after the match….until Banks jumps her. The beating is on and the Bank Statement makes Belair tap. Banks picks up the title and then puts the Bank Statement on again to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was ok for the most part but the angles were what mattered here. You have Cena vs. Reigns made official, Edge vs. Rollins all but official, and Banks returning to set up her rematch. This was the heavy lifting show that Summerslam has been needing and now we should have most of the Smackdown half set. The matches look good too, so hopefully they can live up to the hype.

Results
Rey Mysterio b. Jimmy Uso – Crucifix with assist from Dominik Mysterio
Reginald b. Chad Gable via DQ when Otis interfered
Big E./Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode/Apollo Crews – Kinshasa to Crews
Sasha Banks/Bianca Belair b. Carmella/Zelina Vega – Bank Statement to Carmella

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Main Event – July 22, 2021

Main Event
Date: July 22, 2021
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Byron Saxton

We’re back to the low slow this week and that could mean more than a few things. I’m curious to see how much this show has changed now that the fans are back to energize the company, which should be a nice thing to see for a change. Then again, I’m almost scared to see what we could be getting again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Angel Garza vs. Drew Gulak

They grapple around to start with Gulak getting the better of things off a headlock. Garza slips out and takes Gulak down instead, setting up a quick chinlock. Back up and Gulak hits a slam into a clothesline for two as frustration is setting in. It’s time to start kicking away at Garza’s knee and we hit a wacky hold to put Garza in more trouble. Garza fights up and hits a flapjack, followed by the running forearm. That’s enough for Garza to TAKE OFF HIS PANTS and the Wing Clipper finishes Gulak at 5:20.

Rating: C-. Garza was wrestling as a face here and it was working rather well. I’m not sure why we have never gotten an extended good guy run from him, but it is not likely to happen when he barely ever gets a run of any kind in the first place. Garza continues to be a hidden gem and Gulak can work with anyone, so it is no surprise that they are regularly featured around here.

We look at Nikki Ash winning the Women’s Money in the Bank match.

From Smackdown, a rarity on a post pay per view Main Event.

Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair is defending and gets a rather strong reaction. A running shoulder puts Carmella down to start but she sends Belair hard into the corner for two. That earns Carmella a running shoulder into the ribs but she manages to post Bianca and we take a break. Back with Belair grabbing a suplex for two and going up, only to have to block what looked like a Stratusphere attempt.

A super hurricanrana brings Belair down for two instead and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence. Carmella grabs a guillotine choke but Belair powers her up for another suplex for two more. With nothing else working, Carmella grabs the hair and takes Belair outside for a whipping. Back in again and Carmella misses the superkick, setting up the hair whip. The KOD retains the title at 11:04.

Rating: C. This was a good way to get Belair in front of a crowd and the reaction was worth the wait. Carmella wasn’t going to be a huge challenger and it was fine to have her out there in a completely acceptable match. Now Smackdown can build up someone else for Belair, though I’m really not sure who that can be outside of bringing someone back in.

Quick look at the Usos and Roman Reigns dominating at Money in the Bank, though that John Cena fellow could be a problem.

From Raw.

Here is John Cena to get things going as they’re starting fast tonight. Cena says he can still see some people coming in so come on down. After acknowledging a kid’s “I’m turning 11 and I’m here to see John Cena” sign, Cena says he missed us. Cena talks about what a group effort Raw is and how he was here last night for the end of Money in the Bank.

Paul Heyman panicked, Roman Reigns didn’t know what he was supposed to do, Michael Cole was really happy and Pat McAfee still didn’t know where Cena was. Cena is back for Reigns and he thinks about five weeks from now in Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, Nevada sounds like a safe bet. He could talk about how important Summerslam is and how great it would be to win his seventeenth World Title, but it is a lot simpler than that: “Roman Reigns is an a******.” (WWE censored it too this time).

Reigns is an overhyped gimmick who isn’t as great as he says he is, “and that’s coming from ME”. Cena asks to hear the fans a bit more and says the saying goes if they’re great, the people will tell you. He’s going to be at Smackdown on Friday and he’ll see Reigns there. Cue Riddle and it’s time for a Bro Off (WWE version, not the Impact version).

Toni Storm is heading to Smackdown.

Bobby Lashley destroyed Kofi Kingston at Money in the Bank.

From Raw.

Keith Lee vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title, though Graves suggested it was a title match before the bell. The GOLDBERG chants start us off as they shove each other around to start. Lee powers him around but the Spirit Bomb is countered into a Downward Spiral. A running clothesline puts Lee on the floor but Lashley can’t lift him up for the ram into the post.

Instead Lee splashes him against the post but an MVP distraction lets Lashley knock Lee off the apron. The spear cuts Lee in half and Lashley hammers away back inside. The Hurt Lock is blocked though and Lashley gets flipped over. That’s fine with Lashley, who hits a spinebuster to take him down again. Another spear gives Lashley the pin at 5:53.

Rating: C-. So much for that, as this was little more than a squash for Lashley. Lee got in a few shots here and there but then he lost in less than six minutes. I’m not sure what he is going to do from here, but this is not exactly something that gives me hope for Lee’s future. Not the worst match, just rather disappointing.

Post match Lashley poses so here is the expected Goldberg return. Goldberg says he’s next and Lashley is ready but MVP holds them apart.

Post break, MVP says they aren’t acknowledging the return.

Cedric Alexander vs. Ricochet

They start fast with Ricochet dropkicking him down and hitting a backdrop, setting up the Eddie Dance of all things. Alexander catches him on the apron though and hits a hard clothesline as we take a break. Back with Alexander hammering away and kicking him in the back for two. The chinlock goes on, followed by a dropkick to give Alexander two more

Ricochet fights up but a knee to the ribs cuts that off in a hurry. A facebuster into a neckbreaker works better for Ricochet and there’s a hard clothesline. Alexander hits an awkward tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but the Lumbar Check (Alexander: “LUMBAR CHECK!”) is countered into a Canadian Destroyer. The Recoil finishes Alexander at 7:47.

Rating: C+. As usual, these two were working hard out here and that’s what you know you’re getting from them. It’s still nice to see someone giving all of their effort out there in a match that no one is going to see, though it makes more sense with the actual people in attendance. Good match here, even if the time was against them.

From Raw.

Here is Charlotte for her big celebration of winning the title again. Rhea Ripley can rip off as many of Charlotte’s moves as she wants, but Charlotte won the title anyway. After explaining that Becky Lynch isn’t here because she’s at home taking care of her baby, Charlotte brags about all of the congratulations that she has received and talks about how she has won eleven women’s titles (at least they’re keeping it at main roster singles titles this time). She can beat Rhea Ripley any time so here is Rhea to say she wants the rematch tonight.

Charlotte says no, so Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville come out to make the match for tonight anyway. Charlotte kicks out Rhea’s knee and leaves. Somehow, this took nearly ten minutes instead of “due to her actions in the title match, Charlotte will be defending against Ripley in a rematch, per orders from Pearce and Deville” taking fifteen seconds to start the show.

And from Raw again.

Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and gets faceplanted to start. A whip into the corner has Charlotte shaken up again but she comes back with right hands to the face. Ripley shrugs them off and snaps off a German suplex, setting up a running basement dropkick for two. They head outside with Charlotte hitting a chop block to the bad knee, sending us to a break. Back with Charlotte taking the knee out again and crushing it on the mat.

Ripley manages a northern lights suplex but Charlotte boots her in the face. The moonsault hits raised knees though and Ripley grabs her own Figure Four. Charlotte turns that over for the break but Ripley hits a superkick into the Riptide for two as Charlotte gets a foot on the rope. That’s enough for Charlotte, who tries to walk out, only to hit Ripley in the face with the title for the DQ at 12:24.

Rating: C. I was watching this match and wondering if putting the title back on Ripley here would make up for last night, but then the ending was hardly the biggest surprise. WWE does not seem interesting in having Ripley be a big prop for Charlotte and little more. But hey, at least Ripley “beat” her here, right?

Post match Ripley jumps Charlotte again and lays her out….and we have a cash-in!

Women’s Title: Nikki Ash vs. Charlotte

Nikki is challenging and a high crossbody gives her the title in 10 seconds.

Nikki celebrates in the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was one of the easier Main Events to watch in a long time, as they flew through the good stuff from Raw and even threw in some Smackdown for a bonus. Getting Raw down to about twenty minutes is as good of a thing as you can do anymore and this show wound up being a lot easier to watch as a result. Now why can’t they do that on Mondays?

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – February 26, 2007: I Want To See It

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 26, 2007
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 8,700
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re rapidly approaching Wrestlemania and this time around we have more from Donald Trump. This week, Trump gets to pick his representative to face Umaga in the Battle of the Billionaires, which is going to be the show’s real main event. Other than that, we have the continuing saga of Shawn Michaels trying to keep John Cena safe until Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Battle of the Billionaires, leading to Trump returning tonight.

Tag Team Titles: John Cena/Shawn Michaels vs. Rated-RKO

Cena and Michaels are defending….or at least they should be. Instead, Rated-RKO pops up on screen to say they aren’t ready to compete right now. Instead, they’ll have this match later tonight.

Randy Orton says that Shawn got robbed at the Oscars last night, because he managed to say that he had Cena’s back until Wrestlemania. Cena needs to watch his back because Shawn is a liar. We see a video history of Shawn turning on his partners, which really has happened a lot. Back in the arena, Cena isn’t sure what to think as Edge calls Shawn a liar. Having your back and stabbing you in the back are two different things. See you later tonight. Staring ensues, with Shawn saying “you can trust me.” Right.

Mick Foley has a new book: the Hardcore Diaries, complete with a lot of celebrities.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton doesn’t get an entrance but we do get an explanation of Money in the Bank, plus Big Match Intros. Benjamin takes him to the mat without much effort to start but Hardy is back up with a few kicks to the ribs. Hardy gets taken down again though and Benjamin hammers away, setting up the quickly broken chinlock. A few more shots send Benjamin outside, meaning Hardy can run the barricade to hit the clothesline. The Whisper in the Wind connects but it’s too early for the Swanton, with Benjamin jumping up for a belly to belly superplex into the big crash.

We take a break and come back with Benjamin holding a chinlock with a bodyscissors. Hardy fights up but gets backdropped right down for a fast two. Another chinlock goes on until Hardy fights up again, this time sending Benjamin to the apron. Benjamin slips off a springboard and lands HARD, allowing Hardy to grab a quick two. The Stinger Splash hits buckle and it’s a Twist of Fate into the Swanton to give Hardy the fast pin.

Rating: C. The botch just before the ending is what is going to be remembered here, as there is no way around something like that. Benjamin fell and landed on his face, thankfully without some kind of an injury. Hardy going to Money in the Bank makes a lot more sense here as Benjamin is just a tag guy at the moment.

Post match, Vince McMahon pops up on screen to sarcastically congratulate Jeff for winning. Jeff didn’t win last week when he faced Umaga though, just like whoever Donald Trump picks at Wrestlemania won’t do. We get some of the HILARIOUS shots of Trump in various stages of baldness, which Vince promises we will see at Wrestlemania.

Video on Ashley’s Playboy shoot.

Melina rants and raves about Ashley and Mick Foley getting all of this attention. Next week she has to face Mickie James in a Falls Count Anywhere match and tonight she has to face Maria. Johnny Nitro: “SHUT UP!” Nitro goes on a rant about how he isn’t going to Wrestlemania and has nothing, but he doesn’t have time to listen to her right now.

Johnny Nitro vs. Super Crazy

Nitro jumps him before the bell and the beating is on outside. Crazy is sent hard into the steps, setting up a faceplant on the floor. That’s enough for Nitro, who walks away still furious.

Melina vs. Maria

Non-title and Melina has the paparazzi, which Nitro was lacking. Melina takes her down by the hair to start and it’s already in catfight territory. Back up and Maria misses a dropkick as Melina holds onto the rope. Choking ensues on said ropes, with Lawler saying Maria can teach you some new positions. The camel clutch doesn’t last long on Maria, who fights up and knocks her into the corner. The Bronco Buster is blocked with a kick to the ribs though, allowing Melina to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. This was as good as it was going to get between these two as Melina is still getting the hang of this and Maria was never exactly good in the first place. The idea here was to get Melina in the ring and show that she could do something other than beating Mickie James. It wasn’t a good match, but what else were you expecting under these circumstances?

Wrestlemania is in thirty four days.

Here is Vince McMahon to find out Donald Trump’s Wrestlemania pick. Vince recaps the Battle of the Billionaires concept and explains why Trump is here. He isn’t sure what he wants more: Trump being bald or giving Trump a billionaire b**** slap. Before we get to that though, we see a clip of Umaga destroying Rey Mysterio on Smackdown, just to eliminate Rey from the list of options.

Vince brings out Umaga and Armando Alejandro Estrada before explaining that Trump made his career on outdoing someone else. This might include building a skyscraper or marrying a good looking woman, causing Trump to get divorced and marry a better looking one. If Trump says he’s winning at Wrestlemania, Vince will turn him into a bald faced liar.

Trump pops up on screen to say he is impressed by Umaga (dang he pronounced it right), but Umaga is an animal. You tame animals, and Trump will do that by finding someone or something superior. Therefore, here is the man responsible for Trump shaving Vince’s head at Wrestlemania: Bobby Lashley. Cue Lashley, with Vince demanding that security get out here right now. Umaga hits him in the face and the brawl is on, with security not being able to hold them apart for very long. This was a hot angle and the fight looked great.

It’s time for the Masterlock Challenge with….Great Khali answering. Oh dear. Chris Masters isn’t sure what to do as Khali sits in the chair, as he can’t get his arms around Khali’s shoulders. Cue Kane though and the violence is on, with a bunch of chair shots getting rid of Khali and Masters. This was short and to the point as we seem to have our Wrestlemania monster fight.

Vince McMahon is rating at Coach about Trump when he gets a phone call. Someone on the Board of Directors has an idea: a guest referee for the Battle of the Billionaires. Coach thinks that would be unfair but Vince isn’t so sure. Either way, he isn’t winding up bald.

Jerry Lawler is announced for the Hall of Fame. Lawler seems touched by the announcement and we get the Hall of Fame video, including some pretty sweet Memphis footage.

We recap the opening sequence, including the Shawn betrayal montage again.

Carlito vs. Kenny Dykstra

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito and we’re joined in progress with Dykstra holding a chinlock. With a few moments to kill, we see Dykstra calling Carlito Flair’s flunkie during the break to set Carlito off. Carlito fights back and hits the springboard spinning Swanton but Dykstra pokes him in the eye. A flapjack gives Carlito two anyway but another springboard misses. Dykstra sends him right first into the apron for two and some shoulders to the ribs make it worse.

We hit the seated abdominal stretch, followed by a knee to the ribs to cut off Carlito’s comeback. Now it’s the standing abdominal stretch, including the notable lack of toe hooking. As a result, Carlito sends him to the apron and hits the springboard back elbow back inside. A hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two on Carlito but Dykstra misses a charge into the corner. Carlito Backstabs him for the pin.

Rating: C-. As usual, Carlito isn’t exactly thrilling but the rib stuff was fine for a midcard Raw match. They didn’t need to do anything more than this as the idea was for Carlito to get a win. Granted I’m not sure how much it means to beat Dykstra, but it is better than losing week after week.

Ric Flair comes out to applaud Carlito.

Vince McMahon is still annoyed and is going to ECW to make Bobby Lashley’s life a nightmare.

Tag Team Titles: John Cena/Shawn Michaels vs. Rated-RKO

Cena and Michaels are defending and Shawn keeps his eye on Cena during the entrances. Shawn and Edge start things off with Shawn working on the arm. That’s enough for Edge so Orton comes in and gets pummeled in the corner by Orton. Cena gets taken into the wrong corner though and the villains take over. Edge forearms him down without much trouble and it’s back to Orton for the right hands to the head.

Some choking in the corner sets up more right hands as the offense hasn’t exactly taken off yet. Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets him a breather though and it’s off to Shawn to pick up the pace. The top rope elbow hits Orton and it’s an atomic drop to put Edge on the floor. Shawn tries Sweet Chin Music but Orton ducks, meaning Cena has to catch the boot instead.

We take a break and come back with Edge cranking on Shawn’s arms. The comeback is cut off by the Edgecution and it’s back to Orton to stomp away. The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by the backbreaker for two. It’s back to Edge for the sleeper, which is broken up like any common sleeper. Shawn gets over for the tag to Cena as everything breaks down, with Shawn being sent outside. The spear is countered into the AA but Orton comes in with one of the belts. Shawn takes it away and hits Edge, only to throw it back to Orton. Edge sees Orton holding it and walks off, leaving Orton to get superkicked into the AA for the pin.

Rating: C+. They were in a bit of an interesting place here as I could have seen it going either way. Cena and Michaels dropping the titles to let them focus on their Wrestlemania match would have made sense, but so does Michaels continuing to guard Cena. I like the way they went, and now it seems they have a way to wrap up Rated-RKO. The team doesn’t need to be around any longer anyway so it isn’t some great loss.

The long staredown between Cena and Michaels ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They’re doing a good job of making me want to see Wrestlemania and that is more than I would have bet on coming into the season. Almost all of the matches are already set and that does not leave much to do other than push everything across the finish line. This show did a nice job of doing just that, and I want to see the show more than I ever would have bet on leading up to it. Another pretty good show here, but another good step towards Wrestlemania.




Took In The WWE SuperShow

For the first time in far too long, I got to take in a live wrestling show on Sunday night. This was one of the WWE SuperShows, featuring both Monday Night Raw and Smackdown wrestlers. It was also part of the Summer of Cena, with Cena in a six man main event. The announcement that Cena would be on the show made the ticket sales jump, including two extra sections being opened up the day of the show. Yeah there’s something to the guy. Let’s get to it.

This was one of the largest crowds I can remember for a Louisville show, with about 6,000 tickets sold. The show started just after 7pm so they were on time.

We got a quick video of Bianca Belair arriving and being glad to have fans back. Carmella interrupted and they bickered a bit.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair got a heck of a reaction and you can tell how over she is with the younger fans. They have something with her and I think they know that. This was a basic match with Belair doing the athletic stuff with the power and flips while Carmella was mostly left with the cheating. There was a notable moment where Carmella went down in the corner as Belair was trying to jump over her. I had seen on Twitter that Carmella might have had some issues staying in her top (which I didn’t notice live), but she might have gone down to cover things up. Belair retained at 11:45 with a small package to a very strong pop. C.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

This was a non-title open challenge, but the match was listed on the preview. McIntyre got a big reaction too, but not much bigger than Belair’s. Jinder Mahal jumped McIntyre before the bell so he was fighting from behind. They beat each other up for a bit with their hard hitting stuff until McIntyre won with the Claymore at 7:15. This was really short and I was expecting a lot more. C-.

Jinder jumped Drew post match and got Claymored.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Natalya/Tamina vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Natalya and Tamina were the faces here and it worked as well as it could have, meaning not very well in the slightest. These four just do not work that well together and you could tell watching here. The crowd did get a bit into things so it wasn’t a disaster. Tamina superkicked Baszler to retain at 8:52 after they were trying hard. C.

Of note, there was a kid behind me who was somewhere between 3-5 years old. He was there with his granddad, who didn’t seem to be overly familiar with modern wrestling. The granddad was talking to him throughout the match though, including asking if he thought Natalya would get out of trouble. The kid wasn’t quite sure which one Natalya was, but figured out that she was in red. This led to the most bizarre exchange I have heard in a long time.

Granddad: “Yeah Natalya is in the red. That’s Natalya Neidhart.”

3-5 Year Old Kid: “Like Jim The Anvil Neidhart?”

I had so many questions but this kid is being raised right.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Kofi Kingston

This was supposed to be a handicap match but Xavier Woods was attacked in the back. He sent an angry Kingston on anyway and the singles match was on. This was pretty by the book with Kingston doing what he could but getting caught with the power. Kofi started making the comeback but got crotched on top, setting up the Hurt Lock at 9:56. Exactly what you would expect from these two in a ten minute house show match. C.

The Usos cut a quick promo on knowing they would win.

Intermission, with a few Guns N Roses songs. The Reigns promo from Friday aired with the missionary position line edited out.

Riddle vs. AJ Styles

Omos was here with Styles and it’s like watching Great Khali walk to the ring. There was no reference to Randy Orton, who was advertised for the show on Sunday afternoon before I made the drive. The crowd was behind AJ at first but he had them booing by the end. Riddle spanked AJ a few times to start so make your own GAY COMMUNITY jokes. Omos interfered but Charles Robinson heard him send Riddle into the steps. That was enough for the ejection, despite AJ dropping to his knees and begging. Riddle blocked the Phenomenal Forearm with a jumping knee and hit an RKO for the pin at 14:19. B-.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Nikki Ash

This was interesting because of the entrances. The fans were mostly quiet for Ash (more on that in a minute) and not bad for Ripley, but they seemed to be in awe of Charlotte. That is how they should be too, as she carries herself exactly like her dad did. Charlotte comes off like the biggest star in the world and that is why she gets pushed like she does. The title reigns are still ridiculous, but when you see her in this mode, you get everything WWE sees in her.

The match itself wasn’t great, as Ripley is now a full on face (even high fiving fans and smiling a lot), with Charlotte as the big bad. That leaves Nikki, who had to keep stealing shots when she could. She was on the floor a lot while Charlotte and Ripley beat each other up and then stole a double pin as the other two were fighting over a rollup to retain at 10:20.

Two things about this match. First, Nikki’s gear was rather different, as the tights were the same color as the top, basically eliminating the thong look. I’m assuming this is to keep it more PG and it’s a better look overall. If nothing else, it’s a lot less distracting.

Second, there were two guys behind me who kept yelling/talking about how the crowd sucked for not cheering in the right way for the best match of the night, including not reacting to Nikki. As obnoxious as it is to actually shout at the fans that they aren’t cheering right, the silence for Nikki makes perfect sense. Prior to Money in the Bank and the superhero deal, Nikki was just there. She hadn’t won anything of note and she had barely been around in months.

Well then she changes her gimmick, still doesn’t win any major matches, and then she wins Money in the Bank. She cashes in the next night and….yeah it’s still just Nikki Cross but now as a superhero. It’s like she won the title with a cheat code, so why should she be cheered as some conqueror? The superhero deal works and will be a smash with kids, but it isn’t going to get over until she looks like she can beat some people instead of winning a ladder match and stealing the title. They haven’t put the effort in with her yet and the crowd reaction showed it.

Roman Reigns/Usos vs. Dominik Mysterio/Rey Mysterio/John Cena

Reigns got a big reaction. The Mysterios got a big reaction. John Cena got a gigantic reaction that felt like he was coming out for a pay per view main event. You can feel that he is on another level and WWE knows that too. This was a well put together match as Cena kept wanting Reigns, even coming in to try and get after him multiple times but kept getting held back.

Rey took a long beating and Cena FINALLY got the hot tag at about 15:00 in to blow the roof off the place. Cena had Jimmy in the AA but Reigns cut him off with a Superman Punch. The spear hit the corner though and Cena gave Reigns an AA, which he more or less no sold but left anyway, leaving Jey to take the AA for the pin at 17:03. Easily the best part of the show, just for Cena’s insane star power and the match getting time while being well put together.

Cena threw gear out to end the show.

Overall, C+, as it was basically an All-Star show for a good $33 seat. They have momentum right now, but that isn’t going to last forever. As for house shows, just keep them like this for now. You had a good crowd, top stars and strong reactions. Work with that for as long as you can and stop with the double house shows for the time being.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Smackdown – July 23, 2021: This Was A Fine Wrestling Show

Smackdown
Date: July 23, 2021
Location: Rocket Mortgage FieldHouse, Cleveland, Ohio/Rolling Loud Festival, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re into the second week of having fans back and this time the big story is John Cena returning to Smackdown to see Roman Reigns. You can see Summerslam from here but we still need to make it official. Other than that, Carmella is getting another shot at Bianca Belair for no particular reason. Let’s get to it.

Here is Money in the Bank if you need a recap.

We start fast this week with John Cena starting us off in a hurry. He talks about how hyped up the fans are here and knows that Roman Reigns is coming. There is some sports news coming out of Cleveland today, which is why he has changed his middle name to Guardians (as did Cleveland’s baseball team). He has to protect the little respect that WWE has left because Roman Reigns is terrible as Universal Champion. We’re back live and that means we are on the way to Summerslam, which is a place for the fans to show what they believe in. Whose team are you on?

That gives us a loud CENA chant, so he asks if you’re on Team Jorts or Team Cargo Pants? Team Hustle, Loyalty and Respect or on a team no one respects? Cena wants to know where Reigns is, because at Summerslam, Reigns can’t see him. Let’s get Reigns out here, but here is Paul Heyman (McAfee: “Legend.”) instead. Heyman says Reigns isn’t coming out here, but Cena will get an answer tonight. Then, Cena will know that the Tribal Chief is here. Heyman then does You Can’t See Me and sings (I guess?) the tune of Cena’s song in something you have to see to appreciate/believe. Both guys were amazing here.

Finn Balor vs. Sami Zayn

Commentary makes a special point of going over the titles and accomplishments of these two, which is a good idea that could happen more often. Sami takes him down with an armbar and then rakes Balor’s eyes over the ropes. Balor gets sent outside and Sami hammers away, only to have Balor do the same back inside. This time it’s Sami being sent outside for the big running flip dive from Balor.

We take a break and come back with Sami grabbing a chinlock. Sami cuts off a comeback attempt with a DDT but Balor is right back up with a Sling Blade. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two more on Balor, who pulls Sami right back down for a double stomp. The shotgun dropkick sets up the Coup de Grace to give Balor the pin at 8:51.

Rating: C. This was about getting Balor back in the ring to show that he can still win around here. Sami is the perfect choice for that as he can lose and lose while still bouncing right back. I’m not sure what Balor is going to be doing around here but going after Apollo Crews and dealing with Commander Azeez could be interesting.

Baron Corbin managed to lose money with his Corbin Fund Me because the guy who set up the website stole his identity. He has no credit now and had to ride the bus here. Corbin: “What’s happened to me?”

Here is Mr. Money In The Bank Big E. for a chat. After some YOU DESERVE IT chants, Big E. talks about how he did some crazy things on Sunday (Big E.: “I don’t have any business jumping off ladders!”) but here is Apollo Crews to interrupts. Crews mocks him for only having a contract but here are Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode to interrupt as well.

Ziggler says you better be talking about the two of them if you’re talking about the Intercontinental Title (which we weren’t) but here is Rick Boogs to interrupt. Before he can say anything, it’s Cesaro interrupting as well. The brawl is on and Crews gets a quick Swing. There were a lot of people here and they were talking about the same thing, but the briefcase was completely moved to the side.

We go down to the Rolling Loud Festival where Wale leads the fans in a WE WANT THE SMOKE chant and introduces the Street Profits.

Angelo Dawkins vs. Chad Gable

The set is really weird here as the ring is on the stage, with a really long ramp extending out from the ring. There are a TON of people here too, as in several thousands at minimum. Montez Ford and Otis are here too as commentary talks about the other acts performing at the festival.

Gable pulls Dawkins into the triangle choke over the ropes to damage the shoulder again and a top rope clothesline gets two. A suplex gives Gable two more and a German suplex is good for the same. Dawkins avoids a moonsault though and sends Gable outside, only to get caught with a Liger Kick back inside. Gable grabs a backslide for two but Dawkins hits the Anointment for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: C. They were smart to keep this short and sweet as you do not want the people to lose interest. The Profits were here for the big entrance and that worked out well enough, as the feud continues towards a pretty big tag match. Not exactly a great match, but that wasn’t the point of something like this.

Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Bianca Belair

Carmella is challenging for the second week in a row. Belair rolls her up for an early two but Carmella is back with a flying headscissors. The fans want something else as Belair fights up and snaps off a fall away slam. The handspring moonsault gets two as the fans are saying they want….something. A jawbreaker staggers Belair and an X Factor gets two more. Back up and Belair misses a big boot, which means nothing as she grabs the KOD to retain at 4:47.

Rating: C-. Just like the previous match, this was about getting in and out before anyone overstayed their welcome. Carmella was absolutely not a threat to the title here and while the second title match was a little much, it was over and done with in a hurry. Now just find someone new for Belair to face (maybe a debuting Toni Storm) and we should be in for some good stuff.

Back in Cleveland, Shotzi and Nox are having trouble with their tank. Kevin Owens suggests hitting it with a hammer, which is all he can think of doing. Owens runs into Baron Corbin, who apologizes for treating him badly last week. That is how Corbin has been for years now and he asks Owens for forgiveness. Corbin is even wearing the same shirt as last week (complete with stain) so Owens actually gives him $20. Owens leaves and NOW the tank works, hitting Corbin rather low. Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode come in to steal the money so Owens chases them off with a chair.

Here is Edge for a chat. Those reactions do something for him and he is so happy to be back. If you saw Money in the Bank, you know he should be Universal Champion but Seth Rollins kept that from happening. Edge thought he had all of his bases covered with the Mysterios, but this was bigger than that. This goes back to when they met in 2014 and Rollins thought Edge would never be back. Well not only is he back, but he is in Rollins’ way. Edge talks about being in the Brood and in the Ministry of Darkness but here is Rollins to interrupt.

Rollins greets Grandpa Edge, who keeps talking about the man he used to be. Edge: “Shut up.” Edge invites him to the ring for a man to man talk but Rollins says Edge knows what can happen to him. As Edge sighs, Rollins comes to the ring and talks about how John Cena and Edge are jumping the line, but the more he thinks about it, the more thrilled he is. Rollins wants the people to give it up for Grandpa Edge because he loves how much Edge wants to talk about him.

If Edge keeps talking about him, the only thing people will say about Edge is how Rollins ended him. Rollins isn’t going to hesitate to pull the trigger the next time he has his boot on Edge’s neck. Edge says he lied about not putting his hands on Rollins so the beatdown is on, including the Impaler. Rollins bails from the threat of the spear, though he does leave his jacket in the ring. This was fine as a way to keep the build going for a match you know is coming.

Toni Storm vs. Zelina Vega

This is Storm’s full time debut. Vega is knocked outside to start but Vega sends her into the announcers’ table. Back in and a headbutt rocks Storm as commentary explains that she is stuck in the 80s. A sunset flip gives Vega two and she rips off Storm’s belt. That is too far as Storm grabs Storm One (starts off like Randy Orton’s backbreaker but flipped over into a cutter) for the pin at 2:34. Vega get in a lot here but Storm felt like a star, which is all that matters.

Jimmy Uso vs. Dominik Mysterio

Jey Uso and Rey Mysterio are here too. Jimmy decks him to start and a hard whip into the corner has Dominik in more trouble. An enziguri cuts off Dominik’s comeback and Jimmy does not seem impressed. Dominik gets in a quick drop toehold to load up the 619 but Jimmy bails to the floor. Rey deals with Jey and Dominik hits a dive as we take a break. Back with Jimmy kicking him down again as Rey gets knocked down. Dominik tries a springboard rollup but they get into completely different pages and seem rather lost. Jimmy finally stacks Dominik up with Jey giving an assist for the pin at 7:45.

Rating: D+. The ending really hurt things as it looked terrible and they couldn’t figure out what to do. Thankfully the seemed to improvise enough to get to the finish but it isn’t likely to help Dominik’s already limited reputation. I’m sure we’ll get a title rematch out of this somehow, if nothing else due to the lack of other challengers for the Usos.

Here is Roman Reigns to answer John Cena’s challenge. The fans don’t seem thrilled to see him but he demands to be acknowledged. Cena acknowledged him at Money in the Bank but Reigns did not expect to see it. Reigns was expecting a new Cena but it was the same music, the same run to the ring, the same catchphrases and the same everything, just like it was 2005. Reigns: “It’s like missionary position. The same thing every day!”

That’s not how we do it at the head of the table and that’s not what we’re doing at Summerslam. The answer is no (makes sense, as Bobby Lashley said the same thing to Goldberg this week), but here is Finn Balor of all people to interrupt. Reigns wants Balor to acknowledge him, but that’s not why Balor is here. If Reigns says no to Cena’s challenge, how about Balor instead? Fans: “ROMAN’S SCARED!” Reigns: “Challenge accepted.”

Overall Rating: C+. This was a fine wrestling show, which is some pretty high praise after Raw. There were some good parts and there were some weaker parts, but above all else, there was nothing stupid on here and that made so much of a difference. It wasn’t about doing things that made little sense or seemingly sending some kind of message, but rather about setting things up and getting them done. I liked this show, and while it had some issues, that is a nice feeling to have again.

Results
Finn Balor b. Sami Zayn – Coup de Grace
Angelo Dawkins b. Chad Gable – Anointment
Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOD
Toni Storm b. Zelina Vega – Storm One
Jimmy Uso b. Dominik Mysterio – Rollup with a push from Jey Uso

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – February 19, 2007: On The Road. Again.

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 19, 2007
Location: Rabobank Arena, Bakersfield, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with No Way Out and that means we have less than six weeks to go before Wrestlemania XXIII. The main events are set but we still need a bit more of the card to come together. That means we could be in for something good tonight, which will likely not include another appearance from Donald Trump. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a barber’s chair and barber shop pole in the ring (which is thankfully minus any windows). Vince McMahon comes out to say the Battle of the Billionaires is ready on and he can’t believe it. Donald Trump is going to come into his most prized creation, where Vince’s representative is going to beat him. Then McMahon is going to go over and beat Trump up, so that he can tell Trump that it’s time to be bald.

The good thing is that being bald is en vogue right now, so we look at Brittney Spears with her shaved head. Vince talks about the various haircuts he might give Trump, which means we get a McMahon favorite: WACKY PHOTOSHOPPED PICTURES!!! Anyway, Vince wants us to meet his personal representative, so here is Umaga. Armando Alejandro Estrada talks about how Umaga is happy to be Vince’s representative, but Vince isn’t done. Right now, Umaga is going to become…..the Intercontinental Champion!

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

Umaga is challenging and we are joined in progress with Hardy sending Umaga outside. The baseball slide through the ropes staggers Umaga but the slingshot dive is pulled out of the air. That’s escaped as well so Hardy runs the barricade, only to have his dive knocked away with ease.

They head back in where Umaga drops a leg and we hit the nerve hold as Lawler talks about how horrible it is to have your head shaved. Hardy manages to avoid the charge in the corner so Umaga’s head slams into the post. The Whisper in the Wind gets two but Umaga catches him with the Samoan drop. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike to give Umaga the pin and the title.

Rating: C. Hardy was the sacrificial lamb here and that’s all he was supposed to be. They needed to make Umaga look like a bigger deal going into his huge Wrestlemania match so putting him over a popular star like Hardy makes sense. Umaga winning the title is hardly some big upset so go with the right move here and everyone wins. Well maybe not Hardy.

Ric Flair/Carlito vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito and Flair, the latter of whom takes over on Cade’s arm to start. Carlito comes in for the springboard elbow to the face and the running knee lift. A distraction lets Cade hit a Side Effect though and Murdoch comes in to hammer away. The villains take turns stomping away and we hit the neck crank on Carlito.

A back elbow to the face puts him down again but Murdoch misses an elbow. It’s back to Flair for the rapid fire chops and right hands, setting up the chop block. The Figure Four is paused so Flair can punch Cade out of the air, allowing Carlito to come in for a double clothesline to the floor. Flair hits Murdoch low and the Backstabber gives Carlito the pin.

Rating: C-. Just a tag match here as Carlito and Flair are starting the mentor/mentee deal. Granted it might be a bit better if it was anyone but Carlito, though at least they have something going on here. I’m not sure how far this is going to go, but Flair in a midcard role to give Carlito a rub is going to work out well enough.

John Cena and Shawn Michaels are happy they won last night but Shawn’s goal is still to keep Cena safe until Wrestlemania. Violence is teased….but Shawn plugs the new DX DVD instead. Cena counters with the unrated version of the Marine DVD. They brag about their DVDs until Big Dick Johnson comes in to dance. Shawn superkicks him, earning a thank you from Cena.

Rated-RKO is getting a Tag Team Title shot next week and Randy Orton is ready to destroy John Cena tonight. Edge is more excited about Money in the Bank so he better go qualify.

We look at Edge winning Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania XXI.

We look at Rob Van Dam winning Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania XXII.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Edge vs. Rob Van Dam

Edge’s wristlock doesn’t get him very far to start as Van Dam slips away and hits the finger pointing. Some kicks put Edge into the corner for the monkey flip and it’s time to go to the floor for a break. Back with Van Dam working on an armbar and then cranking back on said arm for two. Rob knocks him outside and hits the spinning kick to the back over the barricade.

Edge is rocked but he is fine enough to come back with a hanging swinging neckbreaker. It’s Rob in trouble for the first time and Edge goes really evil by mocking the finger point. Dude, gimmick infringement is never cool. The chinlock goes on until Rob kicks him in the head for the break and there’s the running spinwheel kick in the corner. Rolling Thunder is loaded up but Edge reverses into a powerslam in a nice counter.

Edge crotches him on top but the superplex attempt is broken up with another crotching. Rob kicks him to the floor and follows with a nice dive. Back in and Edge dropkicks him out of the air for two, only to have the spear hit the corner. The split legged moonsault gives Van Dam two more and there’s the step over kick to the face. The Five Star is loaded up but Randy Orton comes out for the distraction, allowing Edge to hit the spear for the pin.

Rating: B-. These two were having a heck of a match and I was getting into the back and forth stuff to the point where the Orton interference surprised me. Edge winning is fine and it makes sense to push a Raw star over one of the only ECW stars, so go with what makes the most sense in a pretty big match. The fact that it was good made it even better.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Mickie James

Melina is challenging and even JR is half drooling over the two of them. They fight over a lockup to start with neither being able to get very far. Mickie takes her down by the hair and hits a basement dropkick to send Melina outside. The baseball slide is cut off and Mickie is sent into the barricade for a crash.

Back in and Melina throws her down by the hair before tying up the legs. That goes nowhere as Mickie sweeps the legs and hammers away, followed by some hair tosses. The Thesz press lets Mickie hammer away even more but Melina grabs the ropes to counter a hurricanrana. Mickie lands HARD on her head, allowing Melina to grab a jackknife cover for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. That felt like an injury ending and if that is the case, good for them for wrapping up the match as soon as they did. It was a nasty landing and the medics checking on Mickie after the match was hardly surprising. Melina winning the title makes sense as she has been the biggest star in the division as of late so let her run with the thing.

Post match Mickie is checked on while the paparazzi swarm Melina.

Post break, Mickie doesn’t want to talk about what happened and slaps Todd Grisham for not getting it.

Great Khali vs. Highlanders

Khali knocks both of them around like he’s the Great Khali and they’re the Highlanders and the chop puts Rory on the floor. Robbie gets chokeslammed for the pin with a boot on the chest.

Some of the cast of Grindhouse is here.

We look back at the opening sequence and the HILARIOUS Trump photos. There was a Mr. T. and Hulk Hogan version for Wrestlemania flavor.

Kenny Dykstra is asking Coach for more competition but Great Khali comes in to scare Kenny off. Khali wants better competition and Coach agrees. That’s enough for Khali to leave, so here is Ron Simmons for a subdued catchphrase.

Ashley revealed her Playboy cover on Smackdown.

Melina is happy to have won the title but she wants to know why Ashley is getting all of the attention. Do you know how many times she has turned Playboy down?

Mr. Perfect is going into the Hall of Fame, as he should. We get a montage of Perfect being amazing at sports, which it turns out he could do, but not when the camera was on. The solution? Lie to him about the camera being on.

Wrestlemania Recall: Wrestlemania I.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Non-title. Orton drives him into the corner to start and stomps him down without much effort. Cena is right back with the release fisherman’s suplex for two, with JR connecting the bridges and calling it a near PerfectPlex. A slam and elbow get two on Orton but Cena misses a charge and gets clotheslined down for the same. It doesn’t seem to bother Cena, who is right back with a bulldog to send Orton outside. Back in and it’s a double clothesline to put both of them down for a breather. Orton rolls outside again and grabs a chair as we take a break.

Back with Cena missing the shoulder and Orton hits the hanging DDT. Orton hammers him down in the corner and it’s time for the circle stomp. The big knee drop gets two and we hit the rare standing chinlock. Make that the seated chinlock but Cena powers out, only to get punched in the face. Cena makes the clothesline comeback and it’s the Throwback into the Shuffle. Orton rakes his eyes to escape the FU and there’s a dropkick to put Cena down again. The high crossbody connects but Cena rolls through for two. Orton is back with the backbreaker but the RKO is shoved away. The FU is loaded up again, drawing in Edge for the DQ.

Rating: B-. It’s so weird to see this as a fresh match but these two do work well together. You can see them doing their things and setting up their big stuff but neither of them could get that far ahead. Edge running in for the DQ wasn’t the biggest surprise after Orton ran out earlier, but they were having another good match on the way there.

Post match the Conchairto is loaded up but Shawn Michaels runs in for the save. Shawn grabs the chair and teases hitting Cena but throws it down instead. Shawn: “Not this time.” A tease of a superkick ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started slowly but picked up near the end, which is always nice to see. You can feel the Wrestlemania build coming and that is a nice feeling, as they are getting the big pieces in place early. Money in the Bank is going to give some other people something to do and the rest of the card can fill itself out. Good enough show here, as the Road to Wrestlemania is starting to come together.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – July 19, 2021: The Raw Problem Continues

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 19, 2021
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith

The week of the fans continues as we have the first Raw in front of a crowd since March 2021. Smackdown and Money in the Bank seemed to go pretty well but this is the big test. This is the Raw that WWE has literally had months to plan for and they can put on their best show possible. John Cena is back and opening the show so they should have a good start. Let’s get to it.

Here is Money in the Bank if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going as they’re starting fast tonight. Cena says he can still see some people coming in so come on down. After acknowledging a kid’s “I’m turning 11 and I’m here to see John Cena” sign, Cena says he missed us. Cena talks about what a group effort Raw is and how he was here last night for the end of Money in the Bank.

Paul Heyman panicked, Roman Reigns didn’t know what he was supposed to do, Michael Cole was really happy and Pat McAfee still didn’t know where Cena was. Cena is back for Reigns and he thinks about five weeks from now in Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, Nevada sounds like a safe bet. He could talk about how important Summerslam is and how great it would be to win his seventeenth World Title, but it is a lot simpler than that: “Roman Reigns is an a******.” (WWE censored it too this time).

Reigns is an overhyped gimmick who isn’t as great as he says he is, “and that’s coming from ME”. Cena asks to hear the fans a bit more and says the saying goes if they’re great, the people will tell you. He’s going to be at Smackdown on Friday and he’ll see Reigns there. Cue Riddle and it’s time for a Bro Off (WWE version, not the Impact version).

Riddle/Viking Raiders vs. John Morrison/AJ Styles/Omos

Riddle takes Morrison down to start and puts on something like a YES Lock. It’s off to Erik for a knee to the face and Ivar is slammed onto Morrison for a bonus. Everything breaks down and the Viking are sent outside, where they catch Morrison’s slingshot hurricanrana. Morrison gets crushed between then but Omos throws Styles onto them for the huge crash as we take a break.

Back with Omos powering Riddle around and handing it off to Styles for two off a suplex. Morrison comes back in to crank on the neck but Riddle flips out of Styles’ suplex and brings in Erik. The strike off goes to Erik and he crushes Styles in the corner. Ivar comes in for a running corner dropkick to Morrison but misses a good looking moonsault. Starship Pain misses but Morrison steals Miz’s Drip Stick and sprays Omos, leaving said stick with Miz. Morrison goes to save his buddy but Omos throws him back inside. AJ goes to deal with things and the Viking Experience finishes Morrison at 12:07.

Rating: C. I can go for a pretty good six man tag and that is what we got here. They took a feud and two others and put them together to give us some fresh combinations, which is often a smart idea. Distracting Omos made sense as there was no other way around him, so at least they did things the right way here.

The very intense Jaxson Ryker is ready to do something else to Elias, because feuds just kind of keep going until they stop around here.

Elias vs. Jaxson Ryker

Symphony of Destruction (music theme and falls count anywhere), with Ryker promising to silence Elias before the match. There are instruments around the ring and Ryker hits him in the back with a keyboard. Elias is back with a guitar and a jumping knee to the face for two but gets sent through the gong. Ryker hits him with the guitar and we take a break.

Back with them fighting on the apron until Elias sends him into the post. Ryker drops him onto a piano for two as this just keeps going. Then Elias drops Ryker onto the piano for two of his own. Elias breaks the cello over Ryker’s back for two more and they finally get back inside. That doesn’t last long as Ryker superplexes him through two tables at ringside for the pin at 12:45.

Rating: D. This was WAY longer than it needed to be, which is to say it was about 12:45 too long. The feud was over with the strap match a few weeks ago but they did this so they could have something else added on to the show. The ending bump was good and that’s about the extent of the positives here. Now let them be done already.

Mansoor has gotten himself and Mustafa Ali a tag match next week, which does not please Ali. Mansoor talks about how he has seen that Ali was right so Ali tells him not to screw it up. Sheamus comes in to complain about his match against Humberto Carrillo tonight but has to do it anyway.

Here is Charlotte for her big celebration of winning the title again. Rhea Ripley can rip off as many of Charlotte’s moves as she wants, but Charlotte won the title anyway. After explaining that Becky Lynch isn’t here because she’s at home taking care of her baby, Charlotte brags about all of the congratulations that she has received and talks about how she has won eleven women’s titles (at least they’re keeping it at main roster singles titles this time). She can beat Rhea Ripley any time so here is Rhea to say she wants the rematch tonight.

Charlotte says no, so Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville come out to make the match for tonight anyway. Charlotte kicks out Rhea’s knee and leaves. Somehow, this took nearly ten minutes instead of “due to her actions in the title match, Charlotte will be defending against Ripley in a rematch, per orders from Pearce and Deville” taking fifteen seconds to start the show.

Video on the Money in the Bank ladder matches.

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Tamina/Natalya

Non-title and they’re actively torpedoing the show at this point. Joined in progress with Natalya knocking Baszler outside, where Jax hits a Samoan drop into the barricade. Back in and some double teaming has Natalya down, setting up the stomp to the arm. Jax goes shoulder first into the post though and Natalya’s discus lariat gets two. It’s off to Tamina, who gets caught on top. Reginald’s distraction gets Natalya’s attention so Baszler kicks her down, leaving Tamina to hit the superkick for the pin at 3:45.

Rating: D. Just in case you didn’t get the idea the first dozen or so times. The match was short and bad, but at least Tamina got to pin Baszler. I would like to believe that Nox and Shotzi will take the Tag Team Titles, but it isn’t like there is any reason to believe that will be the case. Another bad match, as Raw continues its downward spiral.

Post match it’s another argument, but this time Jax headbutts Reginald down and leaves with Shayna. Cue the 24/7 goons with Akira Tozawa running into the ring….where Reginald takes him down and hits a running flipping seated senton to win the title. Reginald Parkours his way out. If he has to be on TV, this is about as good as it’s getting with Reginald.

Sheamus vs. Humberto Carrillo

Non-title. Sheamus pounds him down to start but Carrillo gets up top for a high crossbody. That doesn’t work either, as Sheamus takes him outside and poses to send us to a break. Back with Sheamus hitting the forearms to the chest but Carrillo bites him. A bunch of kicks is capped off by a jumping kick to the face but Sheamus goes up top.

After grabbing his hand, Sheamus is pulled down with a super hurricanrana. A missile dropkick gives Carrillo two but he punches Sheamus in the STEEL mask. After that brilliant move, Sheamus Brogue kicks him for the pin at 10:13. Note that Sheamus is still favoring his hand, which might not be good.

Rating: C-. Somehow, this was the best thing on the show for the last hour plus. I was nearly stunned when this was non-title and then Carrillo just lost anyway. It wasn’t great, but Priest vs. Sheamus down the line sounds good enough for me. Sheamus is a talented guy and it would be nice to see him getting the chance to have a hoss fight with someone who can hang in there with him.

Here are MVP and Bobby Lashley for an open challenge. MVP mocks the Dallas Cowboys (gah) and says that Kofi Kingston was right: Lashley had been getting soft because of the women and the champagne and the good life, but no more. Now no one is beating Lashley for the champion so tonight it is time for the ultimate champion to face some loser. Lashley says bring it on and…..it’s KEITH LEE.

Keith Lee vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title, though Graves suggested it was a title match before the bell. The GOLDBERG chants start us off as they shove each other around to start. Lee powers him around but the Spirit Bomb is countered into a Downward Spiral. A running clothesline puts Lee on the floor but Lashley can’t lift him up for the ram into the post.

Instead Lee splashes him against the post but an MVP distraction lets Lashley knock Lee off the apron. The spear cuts Lee in half and Lashley hammers away back inside. The Hurt Lock is blocked though and Lashley gets flipped over. That’s fine with Lashley, who hits a spinebuster to take him down again. Another spear gives Lashley the pin at 5:53.

Rating: C-. So much for that, as this was little more than a squash for Lashley. Lee got in a few shots here and there but then he lost in less than six minutes. I’m not sure what he is going to do from here, but this is not exactly something that gives me hope for Lee’s future. Not the worst match, just rather disappointing.

Post match Lashley poses so here is the expected Goldberg return. Goldberg says he’s next and Lashley is ready but MVP holds them apart.

Post break, MVP says they aren’t acknowledging the return.

Here are Jinder Mahal, Veer and Shanky for a chat. Mahal, who is celebrating his birthday, is proud of what he did to Drew McIntyre last night because McIntyre embarrassed him last week with the fake sword. Then McIntyre destroyed Mahal’s motorcycle, but this isn’t about a motorcycle. Mahal wants McIntyre out here, so cue McIntyre from behind with a chair to clean house. Veer and Mahal bail, leaving Shanky to take an insane twenty chair shots to the back (with twice as many camera cuts because that’s how Raw works).

Karrion Kross video.

Karrion Kross vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title (a theme tonight) and no Scarlett with Kross, because why keep what is working with Kross in NXT? At least Hardy has No More Words back for his theme music, which is quite the plus. Kross starts fast but gets sent into the post. It’s way too early for the Swanton but the big forearm is cut off. They go into the corner with Hardy grabbing a rollup and putting his feet on the ropes for the pin at 1:40. My jaw dropped on that one and I’m not even going to pretend to understand this.

Post match Kross promises that Hardy made a mistake and will fall and pray.

It’s time for Alexa’s Playground and LILLY IS BACK. Eva Marie and Doudrop come in, with Eva threatening to have Doudrop beat Lilly up. Bliss wouldn’t recommend that but Eva leaves, only to trip over Doudrop’s foot. Bliss thinks Lilly did it.

Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and gets faceplanted to start. A whip into the corner has Charlotte shaken up again but she comes back with right hands to the face. Ripley shrugs them off and snaps off a German suplex, setting up a running basement dropkick for two. They head outside with Charlotte hitting a chop block to the bad knee, sending us to a break. Back with Charlotte taking the knee out again and crushing it on the mat.

Ripley manages a northern lights suplex but Charlotte boots her in the face. The moonsault hits raised knees though and Ripley grabs her own Figure Four. Charlotte turns that over for the break but Ripley hits a superkick into the Riptide for two as Charlotte gets a foot on the rope. That’s enough for Charlotte, who tries to walk out, only to hit Ripley in the face with the title for the DQ at 12:24.

Rating: C. I was watching this match and wondering if putting the title back on Ripley here would make up for last night, but then the ending was hardly the biggest surprise. WWE does not seem interesting in having Ripley be a big prop for Charlotte and little more. But hey, at least Ripley “beat” her here, right?

Post match Ripley jumps Charlotte again and lays her out….and we have a cash-in!

Women’s Title: Nikki Ash vs. Charlotte

Nikki is challenging and a high crossbody gives her the title in 10 seconds.

Nikki celebrates in the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. I’m being as generous as I can with that because getting rid of a briefcase makes up for a few of the problems this show had. The thing is this show had A LOT of problems, with one bad idea after another. There were some good parts, such as the Cena promo (and that pop), the six man tag, about thirty seconds of excitement over Lee’s return, and the briefcase being cashed in for the title change. That stuff was pretty good.

Then it’s everything else, and that’s where the problems come in. You have things like Elias vs. Ryker going for nearly thirteen minutes, Natalya and Tamina continuing their roll, Sheamus vs. Carrillo (which might have been a highlight with some better structuring), the return of Lilly, whatever Kross’ debut was, Ripley being tossed aside (seemingly to set up Bliss vs. Nikki), Goldberg getting ANOTHER World Title shot (because he needs them on the second and third biggest pay per views of the year) and the explosion of 3MB, because that’s what people are begging to watch.

Last week, I heard someone say WWE fights with its fans on Raw and that is a perfect description. This show doesn’t feel like it’s about what the fans want to see, but rather whatever WWE has decided is going to work. If you like it, that’s fine, but if you don’t, get over it because that is what you are getting anyway.

See Mahal for example. He didn’t work as WWE Champion and he didn’t work as US Champion. Then he goes away for the better part of two years (not his fault of course) and comes back as….pretty much exactly the same guy, but with bigger lackeys. There’s no development, there is no evolution and there is no change. WWE has just decided that you are getting Mahal as a guy on the show and if you don’t like it, too bad.

This show was the one they had months to prepare for and set up something for the fans to care about but instead of something good, we got a lot of the same old WWE tropes (Goldberg returned for the second time this year for a World Title shot) and a few bonuses thrown in to try and take away some of the pain. I was sitting here watching this show with my mouth hanging open more than once, wondering how this is the best that WWE can do. Smackdown was pretty good and Money in the Bank was great, proving once again that this is a Raw problem, not a WWE problem. As I’ve said many times: fix it already, but it isn’t happening.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.