Impact Wrestling – January 18, 2018: Nope. No No, No No No, No No, NO!

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 18, 2018
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

Opening sequence.

X-Division Title: Dezmond Xavier vs. Taiji Ishimori

OVE promises to take over everything tonight.

Video on American Top Team taking out James Storm and Moose trying for revenge. This show is starting to feel like a pay per view pre-show instead of a regular episode.

Flashback of the week: Aron Rex wins the first Grand Championship.

Video on Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Sydal for the Grand Championship.

Kongo Kong vs. Chandler Park

Kong gives Chandler a top rope splash and Joseph throws up the injury X. This is what the world was waiting for: more Kongo Kong.

Johnny Impact wants to take the World Title back to Los Angeles. Drake is from LA too, so does he want Eli to retain?

Alberto El Patron is in Detroit for the sole purpose of taking the Impact Wrestling World Title.

Eli Drake is ready to defend the title anywhere, including Detroit.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Alberto El Patron vs. Johnny Impact

Rosemary vs. KC Spinelli

Post match Rosemary says she wants to face Laurel but has to wait for our favorite bunny Allie to get her chance. Rosemary wants the next shot but gets jumped by Hania, who has wrestled for Ring of Honor before. Hania lays her out with a reverse DDT on the steps.

Genesis preview.

LAX vs. OVE

The wire is still wrapped around Jake but Santana cuts him free so he can be Death Valley Driven through a barbed wire board for two. Dave spears Santana through a table to the floor, leaving Homicide to be tombstoned onto a chair wrapped in barbed wire for two. Sami loads up two tables in the ring but stops to piledrive Dave instead. A ladder is brought in but Konnan hits Callihan with a barbed wire bat. Ortiz stabs Dave with some wooden spikes and superplexes him through the two tables for the pin at 16:57.

Results

Taiji Ishimori b. Dezmond Xavier – 450 splash

Kongo Kong b. Chandler Park – Sitout Tombstone

Johnny Impact vs. Alberto El Patron vs. Eli Drake went to a no contest

Rosemary b. KC Spinelli – Red Wedding

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – January 11, 2018: Let Me Talk To Ya About Getting Someone New

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 11, 2018
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

After last week’s stacked card containing four title matches and a loser leaves town match, it should be interesting to see what the company has for a follow up. There’s a good chance that they won’t have nearly as much to offer tonight and you really can’t blame them on that front. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s major events, including the two title changes and James Storm’s career ending. Thankfully they ignore that stupid World Title clip fest.

Opening sequence.

Here are Bobby Lashley and Dan Lambert to get things going. Impact has surprised Lambert as he never thought it would be this resilient. Lambert is here for two reasons. First is to have a moment of silence for James Storm’s career. Since he’s unemployed, maybe the fans can put together a collection and get him some beer money (good line, as Lambert is still one of the best promos in this company).

Lambert is also here to bring out the newest member of American Top Team. This man could do what Lashley couldn’t do when he put Storm down. Lashley isn’t happy and it’s even worse when the new member is revealed to be KM. We get the shirt presentation before KM says he’s proven himself by taking out everyone in front of him, capped off by helping Lambert to get rid of Storm. KM mentions getting rid of Moose, who comes out way faster than he should. The fight doesn’t last long as Moose gets beaten down until Eddie Edwards makes the save. Lashley has to pull Lambert from the ring.

Like I said, Lambert is a great promo but this story has long passed its expiration date. It’s been going for several months now and there’s no real reason to keep it going at this point. They’ve covered the MMA vs. wrestlers thing (with the MMA guys dominating) and now they’re just regular heels. That’s all well and good and Lambert shifting towards being a regular manager is better, but this is living on borrowed time to put it mildly.

Post break, the obvious tag match is made.

The announcers recap last week’s show again.

Here’s Grand Champion Ethan Carter III to issue an open challenge for the title. First though, Carter needs to mock Matt Sydal for choking over and over again every time he has a chance to win the big one. Sydal chokes so much he might as well play forward for the Ottawa Senators. That gets the expected heat from the crowd and now the open challenge is on.

Grand Championship: Ethan Carter III vs. Petey Williams

Carter is defending of course….and there are no judges or any mention of the round system. Could it be true? Did my New Year’s wish come true? Well at least the one regarding the Grand Championship? The fans are way into Petey and a headscissors makes those cheers even louder. He ties Carter in the Tree of Woe as we hear, for the second time in the match, about what a great comeback story Williams was in 2017.

Carter sends him into the corner and chokes on the rope, followed by a knee to the ribs. A waistlock keeps Petey down for a bit but he reverses into a side roll for two. The Canadian Destroyer is countered into a TK3 for two and Petey is sent outside. As Petey holds his knee, Sydal runs in for the DQ at 4:49. There was no mention made of the round system and judges being dropped.

Rating: D. This was too short to mean much but I’m more interested in this seemingly turning back into the TV Title. I’m guessing Sydal’s promo last week where he suggested a regular match for the title is all we’re getting and I’m really fine with that. The round system was a bad idea from the first day and the thing should have just been a regular midcard title. This is the right move and gets rid of a problem that doesn’t need to exist.

Allie isn’t happy with Laurel Van Ness attacking her last week. She’s not the weak little Allie anymore and she’s ready to play if Laurel wants to. Much more serious here, but still with a hint of the old Allie in there, as there should be.

Alberto El Patron isn’t happy.


Sydal says Carter can’t call him out and not expect to pay the consequences. He wants a title shot with a sixty minute time limit and no rounds (“That’s out”) and no judges (“They’re gone). If Carter can beat him there, then he’ll get a handshake and a hug. The challenge makes sense, and PLEASE let that be a permanent change.

We see James Storm winning the World Title from Kurt Angle in less than two minutes on October 20, 2011.

KC Spinelli vs. Laurel Van Ness

Non-title. Laurel takes her straight into the corner and knees her in the ribs before yelling at Spinelli for touching her fur coat. Spinelli slaps her right back but gets kicked in the face for her disrespect. A bridging vertical suplex (that’s a new one for some reason) gets two on Laurel and they kick each other in the face at the same time. Laurel is up first and a curb stomp into the Unprettier is good for the pin on Spinelli at 5:22.

Rating: D+. This was fine as a way to get Laurel a win under her belt and that’s always a good idea. Of course it would have been a good idea to have Spinelli work a match on Impact before they showed her in the Canadian promotion but that’s another problem for later. If nothing else, Laurel’s gimmick is really starting to work for her. She looks outstanding in her gear but the shots of her face are nothing short of unnerving.

Post match Allie comes in and beats on Laurel before holding up the title.

Here are Eli Drake and Chris Adonis for a championship address. Adonis channels a little Rick Rude with a “what we’d like to have right now” to introduce for the champ. Drake calls anyone who lives in this horrible weather year round a dummy before holding up the title. He shifts his attention to Alberto, who came back all upset but then thought he could swim with the big fish.

Drake is standing here with the title and Alberto should have stayed at the bar. He’ll defend the title again next week in Detroit but here’s Alberto to interrupt. Alberto, now a full on face again, says he’d love to beat Drake around the ring next week. He wants to fight now but here’s Johnny Impact to interrupt. Johnny has heard about both of them being in Detroit so he’ll have to join the party. The brawl is on with Johnny getting the better of it. Drake has already beaten both of these guys and I’m really not sure why we need to see these three fight any more, save for the company has nothing else to do at this point.

We look at Raven having his head shaved back in 2003.

Recap of the opening segment.

American Top Team (now just Lambert, Lashley and KM) are in the back and Lambert gives KM all of the credit for getting rid of Storm. Lashley isn’t happy.

Chandler and Joseph Park are glad about Chandler’s win last week. Jimmy Jacobs comes up to ask what happened to Abyss. Jacobs: “You used to be the guy that put people into ambulance and now you’re the guy chasing ambulances.” Chandler, in a nasal voice, stands up to Jacobs because Joseph is family. Jacobs steps aside so Kongo Kong, who Jimmy says is family to him can come in. Chandler: “So scary!” I like the Parks but I could go without seeing Jacobs or Kong ever again, especially the latter.

OVE wrecks LAX’s clubhouse. Good grief ENOUGH BETWEEN THESE TEAMS ALREADY! Post break LAX finds the wrecked clubhouse and says it’s time to go back to their roots. Barbed wire is mentioned.

Cult of Lee/Hakim Zane vs. Dezmond Xavier/Garza Jr./Sonjay Dutt

Garza headbutts Zane around to start and brings in Xavier to trip him up a few times. A dropkick to the back of the head sends Zane outside as everything breaks down. Back from a break with Zane charging into Dutt’s boot in the corner as Lee poses in the corner. Zane actually gets in a few shots to the back and hands it off to Konley for a double arm crank. Lee kicks at the chest as we hear about Ishimori defending the title in Japan.

Even Zane gets to come in for a chinlock until Dutt dropkicks him down. The hot tag brings in Garza to clean house but hang on because IT’S TIME FOR GARZA TO TAKE OFF HIS PANTS! It’s so distracting that Konley and Lee don’t notice Zane’s missile dropkick which hits them by mistake. Dezmond comes in and hits the Final Flash for the pin on Zane at 10:27.

Rating: C-. This was your run of the mill X-Division match and that’s the big problem: even when you get someone like Xavier or Ishimori, they’re stuck with these generic heels who don’t do anything to set themselves apart. Why should I be interested in seeing people defeat weak talents and not get to show off what they can do? It’s a big reason why the division is boring and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

Post match Ishimori comes out and holds up the title in front of Xavier. They shake hands before their title match next week.

Also next week: Kongo Kong vs. Chandler Park and clips of the triple threat match from Detroit. You know, a match we can’t have HERE. Also, a barbed wire match with OVE vs. LAX.

Moose/Eddie Edwards vs. KM/Bobby Lashley

It’s a brawl to start until we settle down to KM vs. Moose. Some chops in the corner have KM in trouble but he avoids Edwards’ elbow, allowing the beatdown to begin. Back from an early break with Lashley slamming Eddie for two but missing a charge to fall outside. Moose comes in for a double elbow to KM, followed by Eddie jumping on Moose’s back for a double backsplash. Edwards gets posted though and the heels take over again.

Lashley’s neckbreaker doesn’t even get one as Moose is in there IMMEDIATELY for the save. Eddie reverses a suplex to put KM down but Lashley breaks up the tag attempt. Lashley charges into a knee though and a middle rope dropkick puts him down. A crawl through the legs is enough to bring in KM and Moose’s middle rope chokebomb gets two. KM gets low bridged to the floor and Eddie follows him out with the suicide dive. Lambert gets in a cheap shot though and KM’s powerbomb into a Backstabber is enough to pin Eddie at 14:46.

Rating: D+. This was a way to establish KM as a member of the team but it should also help further the wedge between Lambert and Lashley, likely leading to Lashley turning face. I’m not sure why this is considered a big deal when people turn around here so frequently (including Lashley) but that’s certainly better for a conclusion to the story than anything else I’ve seen so far.

A preview of OVE vs. LAX wraps us up.

Overall Rating: C. Not a bad show this week as they were advancing a lot of stuff while getting ready for some of the bigger matches down the line. You need that kind of show, especially coming off of a bigger episode like last week. That being said, I have no idea why we can’t have a World Title match in the arena the show is airing from. It doesn’t feel right and comes off like it’s less important than everything else. Fix that up and the title seems more important. Other than that, they’ve got some good stuff going here and it’s not a huge falloff coming out of last week. Not a good show, but it did its job well enough.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Petey Williams via DQ when Matt Sydal interfered

Laurel Van Ness b. KC Spinelli – Unprettier

Dezmond Xavier/Sonjay Dutt/Garza Jr. b. Cult of Lee/Hakim Zane – Final Flash to Zane

KM/Lashley b. Moose/Eddie Edwards – Powerbomb into a Backstabber to Edwards

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – December 28, 2017 (Best of 2017 Part 2): Get Your Priorities Straight

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 28, 2017
Host: Josh Matthews

It’s the second half of the Best of 2017 show and that means a lot more copying and pasting. There are several options that they could choose to air here but the Bound For Glory main event has already been announced. Next week is the show that really matters though so let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video from Slammiversary.

Speaking of Slammiversary.

Unification match and Gail Kim is at ringside. Rosemary has an army of freaks with her. Rosemary goes right after her and here are Laurel Van Ness and KM for the nearly immediate distraction. Sienna gets thrown out onto them and orders them to the back, leaving us one on one again.

From Slammiversary again. This was joined in progress but here’s the full thing.

Jeremy Borash/Joseph Park vs. Josh Matthews/Scott Steiner

From August 24, we see the final five entrants in Gauntlet for the Gold. The match ran over fifty five minutes but we only see about five minutes.

Videos on the international partnerships, including long videos on Eddie Edwards as the GHC World Champion and Johnny Impact as the triple champion of AAA.

Video on Taya Valkyrie.

From September 14, joined in progress again.

X-Division Title: Sonjay Dutt vs. Trevor Lee

Dutt is defending and this is falls count anywhere. Lee gets two on the floor off a baseball slide but Dutt sends him into the barricade for a breather. They head inside for the first time with Lee kicking him in the face, only to get dropped again. Dutt throws in a chair but Lee throws it right back out.

They hit kicks to the head at the same time for a double knockdown. Why there’s no count when Dutt’s leg is over Lee isn’t clear, but I’d guess it’s because that’s not in the script and the referee doesn’t know any better. Dutt’s tornado DDT plants Lee but a superplex plants Dutt just as fast. They head outside again with Lee throwing a chair at his head before fighting into the crowd.

We take a break (of course we do) and come back with the fight heading into the back. Caleb Konley jumps Dutt, because falls count anywhere now means No DQ. A trashcan to the head gives Lee two but heel miscommunication lets him get a breather. Dutt is busted open and it’s time to hit Lee in the head with a trashcan lid. A tornado DDT off the wall is countered with a crotching onto a barricade and Lee rolls him up (with tights) for the pin and the title at 13:57.

Rating: C+. It never ceases to amaze me how much they’ve sucked the soul out of this division. This was a fast paced match and I couldn’t bring myself to care about it no matter how hard I tried. It’s just not interesting no matter how hard they try (and the wrestlers are trying) and so much of that is due to how worthless the X-Division is now. They’re treated like an afterthought and have been for years now. Why would I care if the company doesn’t?

From Bound For Glory.

Tag Team Titles: OVE vs. LAX

LAX is defending and this is a street fight. There’s no Homicide, suggesting that he was the one down in the back. Santana and Ortiz dive onto the champs to start in a hurry. The brawl splits in two with Jake kicking a trashcan wrapped around Ortiz as Dave and Santana fight in the crowd. Ortiz fights back and grabs a running Liger Bomb off the ramp through a table to basically kill Jake.

Santana climbs the scaffolding as the fans chant about how they can’t see anything. A big splash from near the roof crushes Dave through a table and thankfully they’re both alive. Back at ringside, Jake fights off a table and pelts a chair at Ortiz’s head to save himself. Some chairs are set up in the ring and it’s Jake superplexing Ortiz through them, banging up his own back pretty badly in the process.

Santana is back inside and the Street Sweeper onto a pile of chairs plants Jake, only to have Dave come back in for the save. Four strikes to the face give us a quadruple knockdown with LAX getting the better of it. Some ladders and tables are set up at ringside but here’s Callihan to throw powder in Konnan’s face. He throws Ortiz onto a ladder and piledrives Santana through a table, giving OVE a double pin to retain at 10:21.

Rating: B-. Fun brawl, though they didn’t exactly hide the ending. It also doesn’t help that OVE was losing a fair fight when Sami came in. That should be a heel turn and given how this company goes, it really wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest. Good match though, with the violence being the focus, as it should have been.

Video on Gail Kim. Now you knew they were getting this in there somewhere.

From November 16. As in we’re skipping the title win, because that might put some focus on ANYONE other than Gail.

Gail comes out for her speech and Allie comes out as an invited guest. Kim talks about wanting to wrestle eighteen years ago and finding a wrestling school so she could do just that. We get the required YOU DESERVE IT chants, even though no one deserves as much praise as Gail gets around here. She thanks the women who helped pave the way to get her here (Trish Stratus, Lita, Molly Holly, Awesome Kong) and she’s at peace with her decision.

She’s vacating the title and can’t wait to see where things go from here. No interruption, nothing for anyone else and just Gail. I’m so glad she got this one last moment to add to her collection of other moments. There’s no denying that Gail is great but this company seems to think she’s Austin and Rock combined. Did I miss it when she became the biggest star the company has ever had?

Video on Moose/Stephan Bonnar vs. American Top Team.

Video on Johnny Impact vs. Eli Drake.

And we’ll close it out at Bound For Glory. Joined in progress again, but at least we got to talk about Gail Kim and TripleMania.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Johnny Impact

Drake is defending and has Chris Adonis in his corner. Impact avoids a pre-bell jumping and starts fast with a clothesline. The champ bails to the floor so Johnny is right on him with a slingshot dive. A running flip kick off the apron has Drake in more trouble and a backdrop makes things even worse. Johnny adds a sliding German suplex as Josh says this is the first real test for Drake as champion. Keep in mind that Impact already had a title shot, making Josh sound dumber than usual.

Adonis gets in a cheap shot though and Drake takes over with an elbow off the apron. Drake keeps him outside and throws him into the barricade before choking with a boot. Back in and Drake gets two off a powerslam, followed by some elbow drops. They head outside again with Johnny kicking him in the face, knocking the champ into the post. Johnny’s leg hits post though and Drake takes it back inside.

That’s fine with Impact, who kicks him down and tries a moonsault, only to get elbowed for his efforts. A belly to back superplex drops Drake and another moonsault gets two. The standing shooting star gets the same as that leg seems just fine after hitting the post. Countdown to Impact misses as we’re just waiting on the ref bump/Alberto. Johnny kicks him in the head and goes up again, only to have Adonis offer a distraction.

This time it’s Drake running the corner for a superplex and another near fall. They head up at the same time this time around with Johnny scoring with a super Spanish Fly. That’s not enough either so Adonis throws Drake the belt. Johnny takes it away though and takes Adonis down, followed by Countdown to Impact for two. The Gravy Train is countered into a Shining Wizard but Drake sends him shoulder first into the post.

They head up again (fourth time) but Johnny kicks him down, setting up Starship Pain for two as Alberto pulls the referee out. That’s not a DQ for no logical reason so Johnny dives over the top at Alberto, hitting the referee by mistake. Alberto hits Drake with the belt before breaking a chair over Johnny’s head (Who needs PG?). Drake is pulled onto Johnny to retain the title at 19:49.

Rating: B-. Well Alberto looks like a big deal, Johnny looks like a choker and Drake and the title are now somewhere in the top seven or eight most important things in this company. This sets up Johnny vs. Alberto, but we have no one to challenge for the title. I mean, assuming we don’t get a triple threat out of this, which would be one of the least interesting things they could do. Alberto is clearly the focus of the promotion whether you like it or not, but he should be better now that he’s away from the horrible LAX feud. The match was good, but it was a long exercise in waiting for Alberto.

Josh wraps things up.

Overall Rating: D+. All this show did was show me how messed up Impact’s priorities really are. To recap: we can fit in the entire Gail Kim retirement ceremony and most of a match featuring Shark Boy and Scott Steiner, but we need to clip the main event of the biggest show of the year. Oh and make sure to have that big, long package on the main event of AAA’s biggest show of the year because of course. The lack of ANY kind of hype for next week’s huge show (a graphic or quick announcement wouldn’t have been hard) didn’t help either, making this the mess that I was expecting the Best of TNA to be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – December 14, 2017: Just Don’t Talk

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 14, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

Impact actually has some wrestling competition tonight as WWE is presenting its annual Tribute to the Troops. This week’s big match is for the vacant Knockouts Title as Rosemary vs. Laurel Van Ness wraps up the mini tournament. Other than that we’re likely to get more build between Alberto El Patron, Johnny Impact and Eli Drake for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Laurel and Rosemary arrive.

Recap of Gail Kim vacating the title and the tournament being set up. Again: it was two triple threat matches and a singles match. It’s not exactly some game changer.

Opening sequence.

Sienna vs. KC Spinelli vs. Madison Rayne vs. Allie

#1 contenders match and one fall to a finish. Allie gets triple teamed in the corner to start but Spinelli and Rayne quickly turn on Sienna. A northern lights suplex gives Spinelli two and Madison does the same move for the same result. Spinelli is back with a spinout Rock Bottom but Allie is back in to take both of them down at once. A hair takedown drops Allie though and it’s Sienna coming back in with a big boot to KC.

Sienna tosses Spinelli with a fall away slam for two as Allie makes the save. Back from a break with Sienna faceplanting Madison and throwing Allie down as well. Spinelli and Sienna hit a double clothesline and everyone is down. It’s Allie up first and cleaning house, including a Codebreaker for two on Sienna. Spinelli is loaded up into the AK47 but Allie rolls Sienna up for the pin at 12:39.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but they got the finish right, especially if we’re heading for Laurel winning the title. Allie is still the most popular name in the division (or second most at worst) and giving her a push towards the title would make sense. That being said, it feels like it’s just being kept warm while we wait on Taya’s visa issues to be resolved, which makes some sense.

Trevor Lee/Caleb Konley vs. Dezmond Xavier/Taiji Ishimori

Lee and Ishimori start things off as we hear about expansion into Italy. Maybe we can see some Italian wrestlers that mean nothing around here for a change. Xavier comes in and uppercuts Lee a few times before dropkicking him in the back of the head. Lee sends Dezmond outside and scores with a running kick to the face as we take a break. Back with Xavier still in trouble as Konley sends him hard into the corner. Lee comes back in for a chinlock and a hard clothesline.

Somehow, during an X-Division match, the commentary manages to bring the discussion back to Gail Kim. We saw her during the opening and we discussed her during the Knockouts match and now we’re hearing about her too. Well of course we are. The hot tag brings in Ishimori to thankfully speed things up a bit, only to have Lee grab a German suplex for two. Everything breaks down and Dezmond gets caught in the Tree of Woe. For some reason they try a spike piledriver in the same corner though, allowing Xavier to make the save. Ishimori rolls Lee up for the pin at 12:49.

Rating: C. This division is so dull and so much of that is due to the villains. You can only do the “I’m the champion and you want the title” story for so long and they passed that point a LONG time ago. Completely average match here as we keep waiting for Ishimori to hopefully save us from the drek that is Lee’s X-Division Title reign.

We recap Dan Lambert pinning James Storm last week.

Alberto El Patron, Petey Williams and Johnny Impact aren’t happy with having to team together tonight. El Patron and Johnny talk a bunch of trash while Petey just stands around like someone who doesn’t belong here. Well you can’t fault him for his way of thinking.

We see the last five minutes of the Knockouts Gauntlet Match to crown the first ever Knockouts Champion at Bound For Glory 2007. The winner of course: Gail Kim.

Chris Adonis and Eli Drake seem to have found their partner for the six man tag in the form of Jimmy Jacobs.

Alberto El Patron/Johnny Impact/Petey Williams vs. Eli Drake/Chris Adonis/Kongo Kong

Or not actually as Jacobs comes out to say he’s a good guy. He’s here to help, which is why he’s found Adonis and Drake a partner. Quick question: has Impact ever explained who Jacobs is or why he’s here? Or are we just supposed to have a working knowledge of who has left WWE over the last few months?

Alberto hammers on Adonis to start but gets shoved into a tag to Impact. That goes nowhere so Petey chases Adonis into the corner….and earns a shot against Kong. A rolling backsplash crushes Williams and it’s back to Adonis to stomp in the corner. The slow beatdown continues and we’re just lucky enough to see more Kong. Drake comes in after a splash and drops an elbow for good measure.

Adonis almost hits Kong by mistake and the apology allows the hot tag off to Johnny. There’s a Flying Chuck for two on Drake but Alberto comes in to break up some attempted cheating. That’s enough being nice though as Alberto hits a Backstabber on Johnny. Petey gets caught in a double flapjack but Kong misses his top rope splash.

Johnny dives onto Drake but Petey’s slingshot hurricanrana is countered with a powerbomb into the crowd. Kong and Petey head to the back, leaving Johnny to deck Alberto. There’s Starship Pain but Alberto DDTs Johnny on the ramp. A frog splash to Drake is good for the pin at 8:32.

Rating: B-. Alberto logic made sense and it’s fine to have the champ get pinned in a tag match, but you really could have done almost the same match without Kong and Williams. This got a lot better at the end and once we got to the storyline stuff, but even the worst part of it wasn’t that bad. Just don’t let Alberto talk.

The Legion of Doom was in TNA for a cup of coffee back in the early days.

Alberto gets a title shot on the January 4 show.

The Park Family is proud of how well business is going but Chandler wants to be a wrestler. Joseph isn’t sure.

Video on the Grand Championship match, which will now be a three way involving champion Ethan Carter III, Fallah Bahh and Matt Sydal. That also takes place on January 4.

Also on January 4, Taiji Ishimori vs. Trevor Lee for the X-Division Title.

The next two weeks will be Best of 2017 specials.

All Storm wants is to face Lambert one on one. Dan goes into his usual wrestling sucks speech and eventually calls Storm the face of the company. Here’s the deal: if they fight each other, Storm’s career is on the line. Storm agrees, but if he wins, the MMA guys are all gone. Lashley and Moose start fighting and here’s KM, who is quickly cut off by a Last Call.

Storm vs. Lambert is set for the January 4 show.

Knockouts Title: Rosemary vs. Laurel Van Ness

The title is vacant coming in. Van Ness is sent outside and we take a break less than a minute in. Back (after a good while) with Rosemary hammering away in the corner and Cactus Clotheslining her outside. Laurel is up first and kicks Rosemary face first onto the ramp. That’s only good for two back inside and it’s time to shove each other a lot. Rosemary is up first and grabs her leaning back choke over the ropes.

They fall outside again with an exploder suplex dropping Laurel on the floor. Back in and Rosemary spears her down but has to escape an Unprettier. The Red Wedding doesn’t work either and Rosemary misses the mist. The delay allows Laurel to hit the Unprettier off the top for the pin and the title at 14:04.

Rating: C+. I’m a bit surprised by the ending but at least we have Laurel vs. Allie to look forward to. The match wasn’t bad but treating this like some kind of huge tournament win and a passing of the torch from Kim (who was mentioned almost as much as either finalist leading up to the match) is quite the stretch.

We go to a meeting between Konnan and Sami Callihan. They argue over who is in charge of this company and a match is made with titles vs. careers. Konnan agrees and says after LAX is done with OVE, they’ll be like O’Reilly and Spacey. Callihan throws a fireball at Konnan’s face to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty solid show here as they’re setting up something big for the January 4 show. That being said, I might have liked the show more because it means I get two weeks off from watching the show for the most part. If nothing else this show needs a breather and hopefully they have something a little more interesting when they get to the next taping cycle. This show worked better because it was mainly wrestling and didn’t feature much of Impact’s very sub par writing. Do that more often and the show gets better, though I don’t trust them to pull it off.

Results

Allie b. KC Spinelli, Madison Rayne and Sienna – Rollup to Sienna

Taiji Ishimori/Dezmond Xavier b. Caleb Konley/Trevor Lee – Rollup to Lee

Alberto El Patron/Johnny Impact/Petey Williams b. Eli Drake/Chris Adonis/Kongo Kong – Frog splash to Drake

Laurel Van Ness b. Rosemary – Super Unprettier

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – December 7, 2017: This Show Needs A Motivational Speaker

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 7, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

It’s almost time for a new year but first we need to wrap up the old one as we continue Johnny Impact vs. Alberto El Patron. Last week Johnny him in a long showdown but World Champion Eli Drake is looming on the outskirts. We’ll also get more in the Knockouts Title tournament so let’s get to it.

We open with various names, including El Patron, Drake, James Storm and Dan Lambert, promising to take care of whomever they’re mad at this week.

Opening sequence.

Caleb Konley vs. Taiji Ishimori

They hit the mat to start with Konley working a headlock until Taiji throws him outside. The tease of a dive has Konley freaked out but he still manages to send Ishimori face first down for two. A backsplash gives Konley the same and he throws Ishimori outside for some shots from Trevor Lee. Back in and a spinning strike to the face looks to set up a TKO, only to have Ishimori counter into a reverse DDT. The 450 puts Konley away at 6:13.

Rating: C. So the guy from Japan who never talks, has almost no personality and no character other than “he’s awesome and from Japan” (and who does impress in the ring most of the time) beat a boring guy in plain black trunks, likely setting up a match against another boring guy in plain black trunks with longer hair. We don’t have time to learn anything about them though because we might not get to hear about how to make Impact great or Alberto’s half Spanish/half English.

Lee comes in for the post match beatdown but Dezmond Xavier makes the save.

Knockouts Title Tournament First Round: Allie vs. Sienna vs. Rosemary

The winner gets Laurel Van Ness for the title. Sienna bails to the floor to start so the other two go outside and chop away. Back in and Sienna chops on Rosemary before hitting a running hip attack in the corner. Allie and Rosemary are whipped into each other, followed by a clothesline to put Rosemary on the floor.

A kick to the chest staggers Sienna but she’s right back up for a superplex with Rosemary having to make a save. Sienna gets caught in a double armbar for a near submission, only to have Rosemary and Allie let go. That means a slugout (demon vs. Easter egg) until Sienna comes back in and eats a hard German suplex. The Red Wedding gives Rosemary the pin on Sienna at 6:14.

Rating: C-. Just three women doing moves to each other until one of them won. Rosemary vs. Laurel should be fun, even if it seems that Laurel is just a placeholder while Taya Valkyrie has visa issues. Rosemary looked the strongest here so there’s little to complain about, even if it wasn’t thrilling stuff.

Sami Callihan and OVE are in the ring to talk about how much they can’t stand Canada and Mexico. It’s two countries full of nonsense and the feud with LAX continues. This has gone beyond wrestling and is now gang warfare. Callihan brags about Ohio being awesome but some Canadians named TDT (two guys who seem to be from Montreal) come out to issue a challenge. TDT gets the better of it until Sami makes the save with a kendo stick. Some chairs are loaded up in the middle but LAX makes the save. OVE bails in short order.

Allie is upset when she runs into Gail Kim, who says Allie didn’t let her down.

Clip of Christopher Daniels vs. Senshi from Lockdown 2006.

KM beats up a bunch of people in a gym to prove himself to American Top Team.

LAX is ready to get the titles back.

Eli Drake and Chris Adonis are ready for Petey Williams and Johnny Impact tonight.

Grand Championship: Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Sydal

Sydal is challenging. They circle each other to start with little contact in the first thirty seconds. Ethan’s headlock goes nowhere so he shoulders him down to take over for the first time. That earns Ethan a kick to the head, followed by a standing moonsault for two. Ethan hammers him down without too much trouble though and sends Sydal outside. Back in and a delayed vertical suplex ends round one, with Carter getting the win.

Round two stats fast with Sydal stomping and chopping away, only to be sent into the corner for some stomps from the champ. We hit the cravate for a good bit until Sydal fights up with more kicks. A suplex of his own gets two and we wrap up round two with Sydal tying it up.

Carter gets in a cheap shot to end the round though and Sydal starts slowly, allowing Ethan to hit a hard sitout powerbomb for two. Sydal’s double knees from the top give him the save, followed by a side roll and another near fall. Sydal bolts up top but the shooting star is broken up. A superplex is broken up so Sydal tries another shooting star, which only hits mat. They hit a double clothesline and that’s the end of the round. After a break, the third round is…..a draw, meaning it’s a tie at 9:00. Guest judge Fallah Bahh gave the third vote.

Rating: C+. I liked the match more and these two have chemistry together but the round system is still getting annoying. I’m not sure why they’re keeping that system around and it’s not like anything is really being made better because of it. Just let it be a match with a ten (yes ten, not nine) minute time limit like fans want. But hey, let’s be different instead of logical.

Long clip of James Storm vs. Bobby Roode from Bound For Glory 2012. That was a great match.

Park Park and Park ad. The intentionally low budget is awesome.

Bobby Lashley/Dan Lambert vs. James Storm/Moose

Lambert is wrestling barefoot and American Top Team is at ringside. Storm and Lashley start things off with an early Sling Blade taking Lashley down. Moose comes in for a backsplash (because everyone has to use a backsplash these days) but a Lambert distraction lets Lashley take him down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until Moose gets in a spear. That means a hot tag to Storm as Lashley has no one to tag. The American Top Team member in the neck brace comes in so Moose bicycle kicks him down and tosses him onto the pile at ringside. The distraction lets Lashley spear Storm down so Lambert can get the pin at 5:25.

Rating: D. I’m so sick of this stupid feud and the MMA guys being presented as anything more than a novelty. I have no idea why they’re being brought in all the time for the sake of just being warm bodies but I’m sure it’s something about cross promotion or whatever. Bad match too, but that’s the case with these guys more often than not.

Lashley isn’t happy with Lambert but shakes his hand anyway.

Johnny Impact and Petey Williams are ready for the main event. Alberto better keep his nose out of this too.

Ad for the finals of the Knockout tournament, which is nowhere near as epic as they’re making it out to be. It was a pair of triple threats and a singles match, not Wrestlemania IV.

Chris Adonis/Eli Drake vs. Johnny Impact/Petey Williams

Johnny and Chris start things off with Impact being run over but nipping back up. Eli accidentally shoulders Adonis in the corner and we get the drop toehold into the crotch as we take a break. Back with Drake hitting a backbreaker on Williams and bringing Adonis back in for a knee to the spine. The double stomping ensues and Drake gets two off a jumping elbow (with some finger poking included).

Petey finally snaps off a hurricanrana, only to get caught in a belly to back slam to give Adonis two instead. Williams rolls away and makes a hot tag to Johnny though as everything breaks down. A standing shooting star gets two on Adonis and the flip neckbreaker gets the same. Petey comes back in with a slingshot Codebreaker to Drake but gets caught in the Adonis Lock. Johnny makes the save with a Flying Chuck, followed by Starship Pain for the pin on Adonis at 13:23.

Rating: C. Just a main event tag here that continues to show the value of having a lackey like Adonis who can take fall after fall like this and be fine. Drake vs. Impact vs. Alberto isn’t exactly thrilling but at least there’s something there. I hope we don’t have to go with Alberto as champion again though as I don’t think I can handle that level of indifference again.

Post match Alberto runs in and sends Drake into the post. A DDT onto the title ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. If I had to sum up this promotion in one statement, it would be lack of effort. So many of the stories here feel like the idea is “you people go out there and do this”. End of direction, end of idea, end of motivation. Maybe if we didn’t have to show classic clips or hear from KM and LAX (Why are so many people on this show either an acronym or initials?) or talk about mixed martial arts being so freaking awesome, we could get some of these people some promo time so we can have a chance to care about them. The show wasn’t the worst but it’s still lacking energy and that’s very bad as well.

Results

Taiji Ishimori b. Caleb Konley – 450

Rosemary b. Sienna and Allie – Red Wedding to Sienna

Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Sydal went to a draw

Bobby Lashley/Dan Lambert b. James Storm/Moose – Spear to Storm

Johnny Impact/Petey Williams b. Chris Adonis/Eli Drake – Starship Pain to Adonis

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 30, 2017: Help Us Santa

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 30, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

We’re back to a normal show this week after the Thanksgiving episode last time around. Tonight’s featured attraction is Alberto El Patron vs. Johnny Impact in a match that should probably main event a pay per view if this company had more than two of them a year. Oh and we’ll be getting more footage from outside the promotion. Let’s get to it.

JB is in the back talking to the various women who will be in the Knockouts Title tournament.

We get a mostly silent preview of tonight’s show with only El Patron vs. Impact getting any comments from either.

Knockouts Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Madison Rayne vs. KC Spinelli vs. Laurel Van Ness

They waste no time here with the early rollups, including Laurel spinning Madison around for two. Spinelli breaks it up but spends a bit too long dancing, allowing Madison to take her down. Laurel is back up to deck both of them but gets sent into the corner. A slugout is broken up with a double missile dropkick to give Laurel two each. Madison gets flipped off the top, only to have KC catch Laurel in an electric chair drop for a crash onto Rayne. Back up and something like a jumping Unprettier gives Laurel the pin on KC at 5:47.

Rating: D+. This felt like any given X-Division match: three people who don’t have much of a character (well two don’t at least) doing moves to each other until someone got a pin. On top of that though, there’s the issue of these people fighting to replace Gail Kim, who is nowhere to be seen anymore. It took away a lot of the title’s importance, which really hurts whatever the new champion can get out of this.

We look back at Taiji Ishimori having issues with the Cult of Lee.

Taiji Ishimori vs. Hakim Zane

Ishimori wastes no time, coming in with a springboard seated senton. Zane fights up and kicks Ishimori down as the announcers explain how awesome it is to have all these promotions around. Some double knees to the chest put Zane down though and the 450 is good for the pin at 3:25.

Rating: D+. Similar problem to the first match: why should I care about these guys? This company really needs some extra promo time as I feel like I barely know anyone in most of the matches. Zane won some reality show that you had to watch elsewhere and Ishimori’s character is mostly “he’s awesome in Japan”. Also, is there a reason to have the reality show winner getting squashed?

Post match the Cult of Lee comes in and takes Ishimori out.

James Storm is ready to prove that he’s the real cowboy tonight against Texano. After that, he’s ready to take care of American Top Team.

LAX is ready to take care of OVE and Sami Callihan with various weapons available. Beer is consumed.

From Defy Wrestling in Seattle.

Sami Callihan vs. Randy Myers

I believe Myers was a big deal in the last incarnation of Stampede Wrestling. Joined in progress with Callihan knocking Myers outside and piling a bunch of chairs on top of him. Clipped to Callihan chopping him against the barricade and again to a rollup getting two on Myers back inside. A Batista Bomb gets two more on Myers and we’re clipped again to a slugout. A hard lariat puts Myers away at 3:46 shown. Way too much clipping to give this a rating but it was little more than a squash for Callihan. Side note: I have no idea when this match took place and even Cagematch has never heard of it.

Alberto El Patron is ready to beat the heck out of Johnny Impact. Johnny has gone crying to the bosses of this company to get a fight and now he can’t wait to beat Impact all over Canada. Alberto leaves and we pan over to KM beating up unidentified people while shouting about how that should be enough for American Top Team.

Texano Jr. vs. James Storm

Before the match, American Top Team is walking in the back when KM comes up to ask if that was enough. Dan Lambert says he doesn’t care because they have a cowboy to deal with. Back with the two of them heading outside for a brawl but Texano steals some beer to spit in Storm’s face.

Storm is sent into the barricade and a hiptoss sends him up the ramp. A chinlock with a knee in Storm’s back doesn’t do much good so it’s off to a half crab. The announcers talk about Storm being in a war against AAA and another against ATT. We’re really considering the AAA thing a war? Seriously? Back up and the Eye of the Storm is broken up so Texano can hit a superkick. That goes nowhere though and it’s the Last Call to give Storm the pin at 6:45.

Rating: C-. Is it too late to write to Santa and ask for something more interesting for Christmas? This AAA nonsense hasn’t been any good since it started and the fact that it’s going to be American Top Team after this doesn’t exactly help things. Storm is on his way out and deserves something a little better than this to say the least.

Indeed, the MMA guys come out and beat Storm down as Josh names all of them off in a vain attempt to give us a reason to care. Storm gets in a Last Call on the one in a neck brace and the big beatdown is on. Moose comes out for the save and chairs down one of the fighters. Lambert calls wrestling a circus and says he’s out of bug spray for all the fleas around here. A tag match is proposed for next week: Storm/Moose vs. Lashley/Lambert himself (with Lambert describing himself as the biggest heel in professional wrestling today).

Side note: how worthless of an appearance did Stephan Bonnar have? He showed up, wrecked an MMA gym and then had a horrible match before leaving. Again I’d love an explanation for why it wasn’t just Lashley vs. Moose in the cage at the pay per view. Novelty maybe? The idea that this company doesn’t think anything of its own roster and thinks they need guest stars?

We get a commercial for Park Park and Park law offices, including Joseph’s cousin Chandler, who is better known as indy wrestler Ethan Page.

Here’s the end of Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe from Genesis 2006. That should have been the main event of Bound For Glory 2007 but why waste time when you can make it clear that the former WWE guy is better than one of your best guys? I also wouldn’t point out how much hotter the crowds were eleven years ago.

Johnny Impact calls Alberto a speed bump on the road to the World Title. Tonight, Alberto goes to Slam Town.

Eli Drake and Chris Adonis are ready for Alberto or Johnny. They run into Jimmy Jacobs but nothing is said.

Ethan Carter III comes out for commentary.

Tyson Dux vs. Matt Sydal

Sydal takes him into the ropes to start before hitting a standing legdrop for two. A reverse Muta Lock has Dux holding his knee but Dux kicks at Sydal’s knee to even things out. Dux gets two off a delayed vertical suplex and we hit a Boston crab. That goes nowhere so Sydal kicks him in the face and gets two off a standing moonsault. Dux breaks up the shooting star and grabs a running DDT for two of his own. Sydal’s jumping knee to the face sets up the shooting star (with Dux taking a very long roll over to the corner) for the pin at 5:44.

Rating: C. Dux is hardly a big name but at least Sydal seems to have a story going at the moment against a fellow Impact wrestler. Sydal not being able to win the big one is an interesting idea and giving him the Grand Championship would be a nice way to pay the thing off. It’s certainly better than “hey, he’s from another company”.

Video on Johnny vs. Alberto.

Johnny Impact vs. Alberto El Patron

Alberto wastes no time in taking Johnny down but Johnny pounds him out to the floor without too much effort. A good looking corkscrew dive over the top drops Alberto again. Some kicks to the chest have Johnny in trouble and Alberto throws Johnny’s sunglasses into the crowd. Alberto has a seat on the top rope and is greeted with a WE DON’T LIKE YOU chant. Well at least the fans get to the point. Johnny gets sent over the top in another heap and we take a break.

Back with Alberto in a chinlock after being crushed underneath the steps during the commercial. Alberto misses a top rope ax handle and gets kicked in the face for a double knockdown. Johnny wins a slugout and ducks the corner enziguri. A second kick to the face connects though and Johnny is staggered.

The armbreaker is broken up though and the Flying Chuck drops Alberto for a near fall. Starship Pain is broken up as well and Alberto’s reverse superplex gets two more. Alberto can’t hit the top rope double stomp (good) so Johnny hits one to Alberto’s back for a close two. The Countdown to Impact misses and OF COURSE the ref gets bumped.

A low blow cuts Johnny off but can’t put him away. Instead Alberto ties him in the Tree of Woe and tries to put Johnny’s wrist tape in Johnny’s mouth. That goes nowhere so here’s Drake for a distraction. Alberto decks him with a right hand and belt shot but gets pulled back in by a sitting up Johnny. Starship Pain gives Johnny the pin at 19:53.

Rating: B. It was entertaining but felt like every major Impact match: longer for the sake of being longer and with too many things going on. The ref bump wasn’t necessary and Drake coming down felt like it was there to protect Alberto (which is fine). It also should have been presented on a larger stage but you can’t expect this company to build anything up very well, especially if it’s a top level match like this.

Post match Drake and Adonis beat on Johnny until Petey Williams makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. And we’re back to the same old problems: matches that feel like they’re taking place because they have nothing else to put on, wrestlers we’ve barely been introduced to in big matches (Spinelli hasn’t actually wrestled a match in this company yet and she’s a win away from a title match) and what felt like a lot of filler. The show wasn’t horrible or even bad, but it’s completely lacking steam or anything that would make me want to keep coming back. They really need to develop some characters though because this has been a problem for a very, very long time. Anyway, good show but lacking a lot.

Results

Laurel Van Ness b. KC Spinelli and Madison Rayne – Unprettier to Spinelli

Taiji Ishimori b. Hakim Zane – 450

Sami Callihan b. Randy Myers – Lariat

James Storm b. Texano – Last Call

Matt Sydal b. Tyson Dux – Shooting star press

Johnny Impact b. Alberto El Patron – Starship Pain

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 9, 2017: Canadian Violence

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 9, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

It’s time for a new year for Impact and that means we’re on a new taping cycle. Things should be a lot more energetic this week as we start to see what the latest new brain trust has in store for us. Eli Drake is still World Champion and we’ve proven that MMA is better than wrestling so let’s get to it.

Josh and JB are in the ring to run down some of the card.

We see a package from Bound For Glory.

Here are Eli Drake and Chris Adonis for the victory speech. Adonis has to tell the fans to stop cheering for Drake so he can introduce him as Canada’s favorite wrestler. With a bit of an echo in the arena, Drake says this was exactly how the plan was supposed to go. Now a JOHNNY chant cuts him off (sounds like they’re People Power fans) but he’s tired of hearing about Alberto El Patron being mistreated by the company.

It’s nothing compared to being mistreated by Eli Drake, who has tonight off due to his injuries from Bound For Glory. Cue Petey Williams we as begin catering to the live crowd instead of everywhere else. Petey wants a title shot tonight because Drake has never faced him. Drake agrees but for next week, which brings Petey down to the ring. Adonis gets dropped by a single kick but Drake escapes a Canadian Destroyer attempt.

Jimmy Jacobs comes out for commentary for the opening match.

Sonjay Dutt vs. Matt Sydal

They take each other down to the mat to start and let’s cut to a shot of the commentary! After confirming that they are in fact doing commentary, we go back to Dutt armdragging him into an armbar. Jacobs leaves commentary as Sydal takes Dutt down into something like a reverse Muta Lock (with Dutt on his back and his knee being bent). That goes nowhere so it’s off to a half crab with Dutt quickly making the rope.

Rating: C+. Well that was long. I can appreciated the idea of the X-Division guys getting to showcase themselves a bit more, though I still would love some stories in these things. Sydal wants the title, though after seeing him challenge Lashley a few months back, it’s kind of hard to care about him going after the dead X-Division Title.

Post match Ethan Carter III of all people comes out, which hopefully means the AAA nonsense is over. Carter says it’s another win for Sydal, but that’s what he always does, at least until we get to the big moment where he always chokes. Ethan knows he’s the best around here but Sydal is just another talented guy who doesn’t have the whole package. Maybe Sydal can be reborn again, this time as a winner.

And now, here’s a good chunk of a six man tag from 2004 with Team Canada vs. Amazing Red/Sonjay Dutt/Hector Garza. This is an ad for the Global Wrestling Network and suggests to me that on the first show after the biggest show of the year, they already need filler because they can’t film enough at their tapings. That’s not good.

GHC World Title: El Hijo de Fantasma vs. Eddie Edwards

Eddie, an American, is defending the Japanese title against a luchador from Mexico in Canada. Before the match, we have to confirm that this is in fact a sanctioned match, complete with a Pro Wrestling Noah representative. Feeling out process to start with Eddie’s hammerlock getting nowhere. Instead he goes up top, only to get pulled down with a hurricanrana for two. A superplex gets Eddie out of trouble but he’s a bit too banged up to do anything with it.

Eddie’s Blue Thunder Bomb gets two and he kicks Fantasma in the mask to stop a suicide dive. Fantasma has to stomp Eddie’s feet to break up a tiger driver on the apron but Eddie is right back with a suicide dive. Back up and Fantasma scores with one of his own but still can’t put Eddie away. The tiger driver gives Eddie two more but the Boston Knee Party is blocked by a dropkick. Fantasma heads up again but misses whatever he was trying, setting up the Boston Knee Party. Die Hart Flowsion retains the title at 9:54.

Rating: B. Good, hard hitting match here with Eddie showing how good he really can be. That being said, I’d still love an actual story for some of these bigger matches. Having the GHC Title defended here is fine, but could we have a reason someone wants to face Eddie other than it’s a title?

OVE/Sami Callihan vs. Phil Atlas/Marcus Burke/Ray Steele

The lights are way down now to hide the small crowd. Sami charges right at Atlas to start and it’s a triple kick to the head in the corner. It’s off to Steele who eats a triple boot to the face, followed by Sami putting him in an electric chair. Dave does the same to Jake, who grabs Steele in a cutter for the pin at 1:54.

Post match here’s LAX to keep the fight going. The beating is on and OVE and Sami bail after getting beaten down. So it really was a double turn.

Global Forged winner Hakim Zane tries to talk but Johnny Impact runs in to say he’s coming for Alberto.

From Border City Wrestling in Windsor, Ontario, Canada.

Allie vs. KC Spinelli

Spinelli gets in a few shots to start but Allie speeds things up to send her into the corner. That’s fine with KC, who whips her around the ring without much effort. Allie avoids a charge and a dropkick to the back sends Spinelli into the corner for two. A neckbreaker drops Allie for two more, followed by a fisherman’s suplex for the same.

Not that it matters as Allie grabs a Codebreaker for….just two actually. They’re working a lot harder than I would have expected here. Spinelli misses a moonsault though, allowing Allie to grab a Death Valley driver for the pin at 7:08. Thankfully that means we get to hear her incredibly bubbly music for a nice bonus

Rating: B-. This was much better than I was expecting and I wouldn’t be surprised if Spinelli didn’t get some more bookings out of this. Allie is sch a breath of fresh air to all the serious wrestlers around here and feels more like what Bayley should have been on the main roster. Really nice little match here too.

Alberto tells Johnny Impact to bring it.

Allie is worried about Gail Kim’s big announcement next week. She’s still insanely adorable.

Alberto is sitting down when Johnny Impact DIVES at him, looking almost like a spear. The fight is on in catering with Alberto getting away, only to have Johnny get into a fight with Braxton Sutter of all people. Caleb Konley shows up and fights Sutter instead, leaving Johnny and Alberto to brawl out the door and into the loading area, where a camera just happens to be waiting. Johnny gets in a few more shots until they head inside again with Impact trying some chokes.

Alberto comes back with a wet floor sign as this has been going for over five minutes. After throwing Johnny through a door, Alberto climbs a ladder for no adequately explored reason. With Alberto sitting on top of a restroom, Johnny throws the ladder down….and then climbs up the Pepsi machine to knock Alberto off. Alberto hangs onto the roof until falling down (only a few feet) and security FINALLY grabs him. That’s fine with Johnny, who hits a huge dive, taking out Alberto and security as we go to a break.

Back with the brawl still going as Alberto beats him down some more, only to have it spill into the arena with the fans not sounding pleased. Security comes out for another save attempt and Alberto grabs a mic to say this is his company. He calls Johnny a crazy guy and security actually holds Johnny back for a change. Alberto rips on the company for holding him back and screwing him but he’s willing to continue the battle in the ring.

Security lets Johnny get in and Alberto bails, only to have Johnny say Alberto calls himself the pride of Mexico but he’s not even the pride of his own father. The fight is on again with security taking another beating until Alberto gets in a cheap shot. A DDT plants Johnny and Alberto tells security to get out of here if they want to get paid tonight. The cross armbreaker over the ropes has Johnny screaming until the referees break it up to end the show after SEVENTEEN MINUTES between these two.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really tricky one to grade. For one thing, the wrestling tonight was quite good. The title match was solid, the women’s match was a nice surprise and the fifteen minute X-Division match worked very well. What didn’t work for me though was how little we seemed to actually have move forward. LAX vs. OVE is still going, Impact vs. Alberto is likely going to include Drake soon and be a continuation of the World Title feud from the last month and a half and the X-Division is still about the same.

What’s getting on my nerves is how much time they have to spend on stuff other than Impact Wrestling. Allie vs. Spinelli was good, but how many of those matches from outside the company are going to be? It’s obviously them filling in as much time as they can with their limited content, but when they do it over and over again, it gets a little annoying. Throw in the brawl that went longer than any match and it really does feel like they’re just trying to fill in the show without having actual wrestling, which is rarely a good sign.

That being said, I’ll take a show with some good matches and a lot of energy over the boring, dull, mostly unnecessary TV shows we’ve been having in the last few weeks. At least we had some good matches this time around and that’s a lot more than I’ve been able to say since…..August maybe?

Results

Matt Sydal b. Sonjay Dutt – Shooting star press

Eddie Edwards b. El Hijo de Fantasma – Die Hard Flowsion

OVE/Sami Callihan b. Ray Steele/Phil Atlas/Marcus Burke – Elevated cutter to Burke

Allie b. KC Spinelli – Death Valley Driver

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Bound For Glory 2017: That’s So TNA

Bound For Glory 2017
Date: November 5, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

It’s finally time to have something fresh for this company as we’ve spent over two months on taped TV setting up this show. The real main event is Moose/Stephan Bonnar vs. Lashley/King Mo in a wrestling vs. MMA cage match, which has been pushed far harder than the World Title match. Let’s get to it.

Alberto El Patron arrived earlier today.

Opening sequence, looking at the big main events, as you might expect.

The ring ropes are red and white for CANADA!

X-Division Title: Sonjay Dutt vs. Trevor Lee vs. Garza Jr. vs. Petey Williams vs. Matt Sydal vs. Dezmond Xavier

Lee is defending and there are tags this time around. Dutt and Sydal hit the mat to start and speed things up in a hurry, but the fans are more interested in Petey. Well of course they are. Xavier comes in to kick Sydal down, only to get tripped up and hit with a standing shooting star for two.

They fall outside and it’s Garza and Petey coming in, meaning this is lucha rules. Ok then. Lee comes in and grabs Garza’s bad arm, only to stop so GARZA CAN TAKE OFF HIS PANTS! Garza puts Lee in the Tree of Woe and we hit the O CANADA for the pop of the night. It’s Tower of Doom time though with Lee being the only one to not get slammed down. We hit the dives, leaving Lee to suplex Dutt into a powerbomb for a big heap.

Dutt gets stomped down and things slow down a lot. Lee poses a lot and hammers on Dutt in a non-Canadian way. The fans want Petey (well duh) and Dutt finally avoids a charge to give them what they want. A Russian legsweep and a Downward Spiral drop Lee and it’s off to Sydal, who sends Petey into the ropes. Williams adds a slingshot hurricanrana on Lee. Everything breaks down and it’s Xavier coming in with all of his corkscrewy goodness.

The Final Flash gets two on Lee with Dutt making the save. Dutt’s tornado DDT gets two on Xavier but Sydal runs everyone over. Garza is back in with a headbutt on Sydal, followed by a posing choke. Petey comes in and grabs a Sharpshooter on Sydal because it’s Canada and there are certain things you have to do. Sydal has to bail out of the shooting star and it’s a Canadian Destroyer to plant Xavier. Lee sneaks back in and tosses Petey though, allowing him to steal the pin and retain at 12:40.

Rating: C. Well you have to make sure you keep that AMAZING Trevor Lee reign going you see. The title has completely died and a lot of that is due to the lack of interesting characters or personal issues. It’s just “here are three faces, here are three heels, they’re doing flippy stuff”. I need more than that, but we don’t have time for that because we need videos on MMA titles being stolen. It’s not like they could spend time building up Xavier and/or Sydal, both of whom have crashed HARD into a wall in recent months. Good choice for an opener, but the crowd died when Petey didn’t win.

Tyson Dux vs. Taiji Ishimori

Oh that’s how they’ll fill in time: random matches with this eternally present international talent. Dux was in Team Canada like thirteen years ago, end of his noteworthy accomplishments in America. Ishimori sends him outside to start and it’s an early standoff. Back in and Tyson gets two off a delayed belly to back suplex. The mess that is Laurel Van Ness wanders into the crowd as we hit a chinlock on Ishimori. That goes nowhere as Ishimori fights up and hits a slingshot double stomp for two of his own. A guillotine choke knocks Dux silly and it’s a 450 to give Ishimori the pin at 4:47.

Rating: C-. This was the latest instance of two guys who I neither know nor care about having a match I didn’t want to watch. At least it wasn’t long though and in this case they needed to do something to fill in some time with Rosemary vs. Taya being gone. I was actually looking forward to that match though, making this quite the disappointment.

Grado can’t talk his way out of his match with Abyss later.

Here’s the returning Alberto for his big speech. He talks about working as hard as he did in this promotion and being told how awesome he was. Then something happened and they suspended him because they don’t have any cajones and believed all the lies. The reports will tell you that he didn’t do anything but they suspended him anyway. They even stopped paying him! Well they have been having payroll issues as of late you see.

All this company did was listen to reports on the internet and ruined his career. His kids were disappointed in their dad and it was all over lies that never happened. No one got in touch with him while he was gone and that’s what’s wrong with everything. The people are what’s wrong around here and he’s about to do something tonight.

Alberto turns his focus to JB and, of course, calls him a perro. He goes up to JB, who never texted him or called him once. JB apologizes and we get a very slow handshake but Alberto is here to make a statement. Eh or not because tonight is going to be amazing. Alberto walks away without doing anything to JB.

We recap Grado vs. Abyss. Grado is trying to stay in the country and signed up with Abyss’ brother Joseph Park as his agent, only to have Park rip him off and steal his money. Grado wants out of the deal and we’re having a match for his freedom, only it’s Monster’s Ball against Abyss instead of Park.

Grado vs. Abyss

Monster’s Ball, meaning hardcore. Before the match, Grado tries to talk his way out of the match and Abyss tells him do dance. Grado does just that, only to jump the monster to get things going. It’s already weapons time with Grado throwing in some chairs, only to have Abyss knock a cheese grater out of his hands. Instead it’s a staple gun to the head and the violence begins.

The barbed wire boards are brought in but Grado saves himself, only to have the tacks poured onto the mat. A cheese grater between the legs slows Abyss down though and some trashcan shots give Grado a breather. He takes too much time going up though and gets shoved through the barbed wire for the big crash. It’s Janice time (Josh: “How did he get this into Canada?”) but Grado gets out of trouble with the dancing punches. You know, in a hardcore match.

And now, let’s cut to Van Ness again. You know, IN A HARDCORE MATCH! Grado escapes a chokeslam and sends Abyss into another barbed wire board. A third is stacked on top of Abyss for a big splash, cutting both of them open and giving Grado two. Laurel stumbles into the ring though and steals Janice from Grado before hitting him low.

She picks up Janice and there go the lights. Cue Rosemary (because Heaven forbid we just put her in the title match) to mist Laurel and Abyss, earning herself a chokeslam onto the tacks. Grado rolls Abyss up for two (with the bell ringing and being waved off), only to get Black Hole Slammed onto the barbed wire for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: D. Well that happened. If you’ve seen one of these things, you’ve seen them all as there’s practically a checklist of things you have to see in this match. Grado losing is rather dumb, but maybe they can’t afford to fly him in anymore. The women didn’t need to be involved, but at least they have a connection to the guys in the match.

Team Impact is ready with Ethan Carter III being very serious.

We recap Team AAA vs. Team Impact. AAA invaded, three Impact guys fought back, they’ve had a bunch of matches and now it’s a six man tag.

Team AAA vs. Team Impact

It’s Pagano/Texano/El Hijo De Fantasma vs. Ethan Carter III/Eddie Edwards/James Storm. Texano won’t shake hands with his partners as he and Fantasma are feuding in AAA. Eddie and Fantasma start things off with Fantasma being sent to the apron for an elbow to the face. Carter won’t tag in for some reason so it’s Storm in instead. Texano comes in as well and drives the once again legal Eddie into the corner with Pagano crotching him against the post.

The fans chant for lucha libre as Pagano chokes Edwards on the mat. Edwards hurricanranas both Fantasma and Texano at the same time but Carter still won’t tag. Instead it’s Storm, who grabs a neckbreaker to drive Texano and Fantasma down at the same time. Pagano crotches Storm down though and it’s time to continue the beating. Texano adds a shot with a bull rope and clotheslines Storm in the corner.

An Alabama Slam gets Storm out of trouble though and NOW Carter is willing to come in and clean house. A flapjack drops Fantasma and there’s a Downward Spiral to Pagano. Everything breaks down and Eddie scores with a suicide dive. Back in and Eddie hits Carter by mistake though, leaving Pagano to hit a running….elbow I think to drop Storm.

Pagano gets catapulted into a flip dive onto everyone else and Storm adds his own flip dive (off the post) onto the pile. Back in and we get the required Tower of Doom with only Storm being spared. Instead it’s James coming in with a top rope elbow onto Texano, followed by a double clothesline to Fantasma and Pagano. Eddie enziguris Pagano back down and a second does the same to Fantasma.

That’s about it for Eddie’s run though as Fantasma comes back with his kneeling tombstone to drive Eddie onto the apron in a disturbing heap. Pagano drops a top rope leg onto Carter, who pops up with a double low blow. A double 1%er drops Texano and Pagano and it’s back to Storm, with Carter telling him to kick someone’s head off. The Last Call ends Pagano at 15:24.

Rating: C-. The match was watchable but it felt like it just kept going. The other problem here is it doesn’t solve anything. This is just a match that happened and doesn’t really change anything. There’s no reason for the feud not to continue, which it likely will at the next set of tapings. Carter vs. Storm would seem to be in the cards, which is certainly an upgrade for both guys.

Carter and Storm share a beer.

Chris Adonis and Eli Drake are ready to retain the title tonight. The Gravy Train is coming to run Johnny Impact over and the only thing Johnny deserves is a one way ticket to a beating.

We recap OVE vs. LAX. OVE won the titles and LAX swore revenge, citing their huge numbers advantage. LAX beat OVE down multiple times so OVE is bringing in a relative to help in the street fight rematch. This would seem to be the debuting Sami Callihan.

Hang on a second as we see a body down with a Mexican flag over him. The same thumbs up into a thumbs down is seen, which is Callihan’s signature.

Tag Team Titles: OVE vs. LAX

LAX is defending and this is a street fight. There’s no Homicide, suggesting that he was the one down in the back. Santana and Ortiz dive onto the champs to start in a hurry. The brawl splits in two with Jake kicking a trashcan wrapped around Ortiz as Dave and Santana fight in the crowd. Ortiz fights back and grabs a running Liger Bomb off the ramp through a table to basically kill Jake.

Santana climbs the scaffolding as the fans chant about how they can’t see anything. A big splash from near the roof crushes Dave through a table and thankfully they’re both alive. Back at ringside, Jake fights off a table and pelts a chair at Ortiz’s head to save himself. Some chairs are set up in the ring and it’s Jake superplexing Ortiz through them, banging up his own back pretty badly in the process.

Santana is back inside and the Street Sweeper onto a pile of chairs plants Jake, only to have Dave come back in for the save. Four strikes to the face give us a quadruple knockdown with LAX getting the better of it. Some ladders and tables are set up at ringside but here’s Callihan to throw powder in Konnan’s face. He throws Ortiz onto a ladder and piledrives Santana through a table, giving OVE a double pin to retain at 10:21.

Rating: B-. Fun brawl, though they didn’t exactly hide the ending. It also doesn’t help that OVE was losing a fair fight when Sami came in. That should be a heel turn and given how this company goes, it really wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest. Good match though, with the violence being the focus, as it should have been.

Post match OVE keeps stomping as Sami is announced as the newest member of the team. That’s rather heelish, especially since LAX was fighting two on two.

We recap the Knockouts Title match, which is basically a farewell tribute to Gail Kim. She’s retiring from the company after tonight and wants to go out with one last title reign. Allie and champion Sienna are just window dressing.

Gail is ready to win the title back by being herself.

Santino Marella is shown in the crowd.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Sienna vs. Allie

Sienna is defending and gets double teamed to start, only to double clothesline the challengers down. A double camel clutch has Gail and Allie in trouble until Sienna gets sent outside. Allie hits something like a Sliced Bread #2 into a Stunner on the floor, followed by Gail adding a 619 around the post. That leaves Allie vs. Gail inside with a slugout being quickly cut off by the returning Sienna.

Gail snaps off a super hurricanrana to the champ and all three are down. Sienna is up first and runs Allie over before choking Gail with her own hair. A fall away slam from the middle rope has Allie reeling and a spinebuster to Gail is good for a double cover. Gail slips out of the AK47 and gets two out of a sunset flip. Eat Defeat gets two on Allie with Sienna making another save. Sienna throws Allie outside in a heap but walks into a super Eat Defeat to give Gail the title at 10:30.

Rating: C+. Well now don’t we all feel better? The most praised Knockout ever gets ONE MORE accolade to go out on, because we just haven’t spent enough time talking about how amazing she is over the years. I get that she’s great but she has practically ever accolade ever and I really don’t need to see her get even more praise.

Bobby Lashley and King Mo are going to the ring on their own.

Here’s Jimmy Jacobs, who says hi to commentary and leaves. Uh, good?

We recap Lashley/King Mo vs. Stephan Bonnar/Moose. American Top Team wants Lashley to be in MMA full time but Moose was sent out to give him one last match. This turned into a huge brawl with the American Top Team guys beating Moose down. Moose got former MMA fighter and rookie wrestler Bonnar to help him, setting up a tag match in a cage.

Bobby Lashley/King Mo vs. Stephan Bonnar/Moose

Pinfall or submission only inside a cage with American Top Team in Lashley and Mo’s corner. Some rapper plays Moose to the ring in a cameo that really didn’t need to happen. Apparently it’s Moose’s brother, which really doesn’t make this any better. Thankfully there are no tags and the MMA guys are laid out in twenty seconds, leaving Moose vs. Lashley, which is what this should have been from the beginning.

Mo punches Moose out and Bonnar drops Lashley, leaving us with the MMA showdown. And hang on again as the fighters are dropped a second time so Moose can charge into a powerbomb into the cage wall. Bonnar is back up with a powerbomb to Lashley, who lands on his shoulder. Mo is busted open but the wrestlers take the fighters down a third time as I guess they’re building drama? To a non-wrestling match?

Lashley turns Moose inside out with a clothesline but Moose is back up with a spear to put everyone down. We finally get Mo vs. Bonnar and they go to the mat with Josh doing his worst Joe Rogan impression. Bonnar gets an armbar as the fans chant for Georges St. Pierre. Back up and Bonnar misses a kick and gets taken down by Mo again. A choke has Mo in trouble but Lambert just opens the cage door and sends in the MMA guys. Oh my goodness I can’t stand anything about this match.

Moose comes back and cleans house, including a high crossbody to take down a bunch of guys. A super chokebomb takes down one of the fighters before Moose and Mo leave the cage. Lambert throws Mo back inside and goes in as well before locking Moose out. Mo punches out a fighter by mistake, leaving Bonnar to kick him down. Lashley spears Bonnar but Moose climbs the cage and takes everyone out with a big dive. Lambert is left alone but Lashley spears Moose down for the pin at 10:40.

Rating: F. Oh sweet goodness I KNEW IT! I picked the wrestlers in the predictions but I had a feeling that TNA would have the MMA guys win. Why? Well it would be the dumbest thing they could do and make the wrestlers look like losers to people who probably won’t even be around. This is so TNA and I can’t get over it. Oh and they managed to have a horrible match because it was more about MMA than anything else. Bonnar couldn’t do basic stuff right and Mo didn’t even try to do anything other than slow MMA stuff. Terrible match with the worst possible ending, so we’ll call this the TNA Special.

Johnny Impact talks about everything he’s given up over the years (friends, family gatherings, carbs). When he was growing up, he had two heroes: Randy Savage and his father. After tonight, he’s taking the title back home to his father, who will tell him it’s never too late to go to law school. His dad is going to be proud though, and that’s what matters most.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Johnny Impact

Drake is defending and has Chris Adonis in his corner. Impact avoids a pre-bell jumping and starts fast with a clothesline. The champ bails to the floor so Johnny is right on him with a slingshot dive. A running flip kick off the apron has Drake in more trouble and a backdrop makes things even worse. Johnny adds a sliding German suplex as Josh says this is the first real test for Drake as champion. Keep in mind that Impact already had a title shot, making Josh sound dumber than usual.

Adonis gets in a cheap shot though and Drake takes over with an elbow off the apron. Drake keeps him outside and throws him into the barricade before choking with a boot. Back in and Drake gets two off a powerslam, followed by some elbow drops. They head outside again with Johnny kicking him in the face, knocking the champ into the post. Johnny’s leg hits post though and Drake takes it back inside.

That’s fine with Impact, who kicks him down and tries a moonsault, only to get elbowed for his efforts. A belly to back superplex drops Drake and another moonsault gets two. The standing shooting star gets the same as that leg seems just fine after hitting the post. Countdown to Impact misses as we’re just waiting on the ref bump/Alberto. Johnny kicks him in the head and goes up again, only to have Adonis offer a distraction.

This time it’s Drake running the corner for a superplex and another near fall. They head up at the same time this time around with Johnny scoring with a super Spanish Fly. That’s not enough either so Adonis throws Drake the belt. Johnny takes it away though and takes Adonis down, followed by Countdown to Impact for two. The Gravy Train is countered into a Shining Wizard but Drake sends him shoulder first into the post.

They head up again (fourth time) but Johnny kicks him down, setting up Starship Pain for two as Alberto pulls the referee out. That’s not a DQ for no logical reason so Johnny dives over the top at Alberto, hitting the referee by mistake. Alberto hits Drake with the belt before breaking a chair over Johnny’s head (Who needs PG?). Drake is pulled onto Johnny to retain the title at 19:49.

Rating: B-. Well Alberto looks like a big deal, Johnny looks like a choker and Drake and the title are now somewhere in the top seven or eight most important things in this company. This sets up Johnny vs. Alberto, but we have no one to challenge for the title. I mean, assuming we don’t get a triple threat out of this, which would be one of the least interesting things they could do. Alberto is clearly the focus of the promotion whether you like it or not, but he should be better now that he’s away from the horrible LAX feud. The match was good, but it was a long exercise in waiting for Alberto.

We’re off the air less than thirty seconds after the match ends. The screen says “matchup graphics” because we needed to go out on one last production error.

Overall Rating: C-. So that’s the biggest show of the year. This show was the definition of mediocre with some good action, horrible booking choices and practically nothing memorable whatsoever. The ending of the cage match was about as dumb as they could get and I didn’t really expect anything less. Tomorrow they start another marathon taping session to take us into the new year, but this time it’s without anything major to build towards. In other words, imagine a show with even less motivation than its had lately.

The show certainly wasn’t terrible and there was some good stuff sprinkled throughout, but it was nothing that hadn’t been done before. That’s this company in a nutshell for you: it could have been worse, but it’s nothing you’re ever going to want to go back and see again, plus one major error in what should have been a layup. Oh and former WWE people who didn’t add much. I was hoping for more from their Wrestlemania, but I didn’t once actually expect it. If that doesn’t sum up TNA, I don’t know what does.

Results

Trevor Lee b. Sonjay Dutt, Garza Jr., Petey Williams, Matt Sydal and Dezmond Xavier – Canadian Destroyer to Xavier

Taiji Ishimori b. Tyson Dux – 450

Abyss b. Grado – Black Hole Slam onto a barbed wire board

Team Impact b. Team AAA – Last Call to Pagano

OVE b. LAX – Piledriver through a table to Santana

Gail Kim b. Sienna and Allie – Super Eat Defeat to Sienna

Lashley/King Mo b. Moose/Stephan Bonnar – Spear to Moose

Eli Drake b. Johnny Impact – Chair to the head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Bound For Glory 2017 Preview

I don’t even know where we are at this point. This promotion has turned completely upside down with large chunks of the show being built around action from other promotions, often which had nothing to do with Impact Wrestling. Other than that, it’s been a lot of talk about mixed martial arts, because it’s really the same thing right? I’m not sure what we’ll be getting at “Bound For Glory 2017”, but it turns out there will be one less match than we were expecting. Let’s get to it.

X-Division Title: Trevor Lee(c) vs. Dezmond Xavier vs. Garza Jr. vs. Matt Sydal vs. Petey Williams vs. Sonjay Dutt

If this sounds familiar to you, it’s certainly not because they ran the same thing on this week’s episode of “Impact Wrestling”. No see while that was a one fall six way match, this is a one fall six way match for the title. It’s totally different that way. That was won by Xavier, which in theory should eliminate him from contending for the title. However, that’s not the way things work around here.

I’ll go with Sydal winning the title here, as the company certainly seemed ready to do something with him but pulled the plug in a hurry. Xavier would make the most sends (and would actually make the Super X Cup mean anything whatsoever) while the rest are really just warm bodies. Well somewhat colder in Garza’s case because HE TAKES OFF HIS PANTS! Then again it’s not like the X-Division Title means anything but hopefully they can put on an entertaining match in the time they’re given.

Abyss vs. Grado

This story….I’m not sure what to think about it actually. It’s a pretty simple concept (I help you, you take advantage of me, I want revenge) and the immigration stuff is all just window dressing. The problem is I have no reason to care about Grado. I’ve never really found him funny and the reason he was wanted to stay in the country was to eat various American foods. That’s the best hero we can have?

I’ll take Grado to win here as getting rid of him wouldn’t make sense, though that’s never stopped this company before. Above all else, he needs to be around for the sake of filling in a spot on the roster. Abyss has lost a ton of these things before and it wouldn’t surprise me if he slipped on a banana peel and lost again here. Grado isn’t exactly entertaining but he has more potential than Abyss at the moment.

Team Impact vs. Team AAA

So here’s the invasion match, which feels like they just wrote “insert invasion angle here with whomever you have left” in the script and hoped for the best. There’s no reason to care about either team and none of them interest me whatsoever. This story has been lame from the start and there’s no real reason to assume that it’s going to get any better as we do the six man.

Team Impact should win here as it’s really the only logical way to go and I’ll take them to do so, though I wouldn’t be shocked at all to see Team AAA win so this partnership can keep going. I still have no idea why I’m supposed to care about a bunch of wrestlers that I know almost nothing about coming in to this company but the announcers have spent so much time telling me how awesome these three are that I would feel bad if I didn’t watch.

Knockouts Title: Sienna(c) vs. Gail Kim vs. Allie

I’m going to do this assuming that Rosemary, who is now out of a match, isn’t added to the match, though it would make perfect sense to put her in (four Canadians instead of three) with the Taya Valkyrie fight falling through. I’m not even going to waste much time here: this is going to be all about Gail Kim whether you like it or not, which is almost always the case around here.

Of course I’m going with Kim. This company has basically worshiped her (not saying it’s completely undeserved) and it wouldn’t shock me to see her give her a big, grand farewell, basically leaving the division looking like a bunch of losers in the process. Allie and Sienna are just details here and that’s all they’ve been the whole time. I wish there was another way of looking at this but it’s been the Kim show the entire time, as you knew it would be.

Tag Team Titles: OVE(c) vs. LAX

This is a 5150 street fight, which basically means a street fight with numbers in the title. In theory this means the entirety of LAX is allowed to fight, which is why OVE has brought in Sami Callihan to help them out. That should be enough to help the champs even the odds, as Konnan can’t do anything physical and Homicide is really just there for cheap shots.

OVE retains here of course, as we’re already past the point of LAX meaning much. Of course there’s also the issue of who in the world challenges the champs next. It’s not like there’s much of a division at the moment so it’s either build a new team from the roster or keep going with LAX. Either way, OVE retains here.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake(c) vs Johnny Impact

Sure the World Title is on the line here but let’s not pretend for a minute that this is the real main event. Drake has been champion for a few months now and Impact is one of the biggest stars the company has at the moment. He’s also the AAA World Champion and you know how this promotion likes to cross-promote with the international promotions. That’s not a good sign for Drake, but stranger things have happened.

I’ll take Drake to retain the title here, possibly due to interference from the returning Alberto El Patron. I think the company would like the idea of having El Patron vs. Impact for some kind of real champion of Mexico match and we’d just be lucky enough to have it be treated as a bigger deal than the World Title feud. Of course don’t count out the idea of El Patron somehow walking out as champion either. Drake wins, but there’s a good chance that things aren’t over for him yet.

Bobby Lashley/King Mo vs. Moose/Stephan Bonnar

Let’s not pretend that this isn’t the main event. This match has gotten more development, airtime, promos and attention than anything else on the card by a mile. Impact Wrestling has had a very longstanding obsession with mixed martial arts and it’s no surprise that they’re putting it on the big stage like this. Really, you knew they wanted to do this as soon as they had a fighter like Lashley on the roster.

I’m going with Moose and Bonnar to win, even though this really should just be Lashley vs. Moose. It’s the same match and we wouldn’t have to wait around for King Mo and Bonnar, who have no business wrestling at this high of a level. You have to assume that Lashley is going to head to MMA sooner or later, so taking him off TV would make sense. This probably should close the show, though I’m fine with the World Title getting that spot, disparity in importance on TV aside.

Overall Thoughts

The crazy long taping cycle killed the build towards this show and there’s barely any way to recover from that. So much of the shows has been spent on matches from Canada, Mexico and Japan, almost none of which had anything to do with setting up the pay per view. That being said, this promotion has a history of being FAR better on pay per view than they are on TV, as it’s just the wrestlers wrestling instead of the nonsense with the creative department. The show could be good, but they desperately need (another) change of pace to fire up their TV, which has been dreadful lately.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 2, 2017: Bound For A Breakdown

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 2, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

It’s the go home show for this year’s Bound For Glory and that really could mean anything tonight. The big question is how much action will actually take place in this country, which has been up and down over the last few months. They need to set up some stuff for Sunday though and that needs to be done in a hurry. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Video on Rosemary vs. Taya Valkyrie.

From Border City Wrestling in Canada.

Rosemary/Allie vs. KC Spinelli/Sienna

Well at least most of them are from GFW. The villains jump Rosemary and Allie to start and Allie gets choked in the corner. It’s quickly off to Rosemary for a crossbody and a kick to Sienna’s head. A cheap shot from behind puts Rosemary in trouble as the announcers talk about everything on Sunday.

Rosemary’s choke over the ropes has Sienna in trouble but she has to let it go and falls to the floor. The lights are so dark that she’s hard to see out there, suggesting that there are very few fans at the show. A double collision allows the hot tag to Allie so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Sienna kicks Spinelli by mistake. A Codebreaker from Allie sends Sienna into a German suplex, allowing Allie to grab the pin at 6:20.

Rating: C. This was a noted improvement: three of the four people involved actually work for the company putting on this show. They tried to tie something in with Allie pinning Sienna but that title match is so entirely focused on Gail Kim that these two are really just details. Passable match, but I’m really hoping we get something else to hype up the title match.

Video on Lashley/King Mo vs. Moose/Stephan Bonnar.

Here are Lashley and American Top Team to yell about how fake wrestling is. The men they’re fighting on Sunday are athletes, but Moose isn’t a fighter and Bonnar is famous for losing. On Sunday, they’ll be exposed as fake fighters and everyone will know that wrestling isn’t legit. Then they’ll stop coming and wrestling is destroyed for good. Again: Lambert is a good heel, but he’s stuck in this story which is both really downplaying wrestling and is also the show’s main event. I wouldn’t be shocked to see Moose and Bonnar lose either, because TNA really is that dumb.

Recap of Grado vs. Joseph Park.

From Pro Wrestling Noah in Tokyo.

Moose/Yuji Okabayashi vs. Katsuhiko Nakajima/Masa Kitamiya

Yuji and Masa trade some shots to start before it’s off to Moose to clean house with a dropkick and bicycle kick. Kitamiya gets dropkicked off the top rope and out to the floor and a hesitation dropkick in the corner gives Moose two. Moose and Kitamiya get in a hoss fight until Moose sends him shoulder first into the post.

Josh says this is strong style you’re only going to see in Impact. Well, save for IN THE NOAH PROMOTION WHERE THIS IS TAKING PLACE BECAUSE GFW CAN’T EVEN GET TV RIGHT. Moose gets sent outside and a double bulldog gets two on Yuji. A spear gets two on Yuji but he pops up to slug it out with Kitamiya. Yuji takes him down and hits a top rope splash for the pin at 8:32.

Rating: D+. Same problem on a different show: this focused on the three Japanese guys, none of whom I’m supposed to be paying to see in a feature match on Sunday. The commentary was more about hyping up the GFW Network so you can see more of this kind of wrestling there. The match was fine enough with four big guys hitting each other hard, but it does nothing to set up the match that matters.

We run down the Bound For Glory card.

LAX is in their clubhouse when Eli Drake and Chris Adonis show up. They bring guacamole as a peace offering and an agreement is made for one night only. They’ll help take out each others’ opponents for Sunday in a six man tag tonight.

Video on OVE vs. LAX.

Video on the six people in the X-Division Title match on Sunday. What title match you ask? Eh don’t worry about it, as this is the first time it was mentioned.

Trevor Lee vs. Dezmond Xavier vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Petey Williams vs. Matt Sydal vs. Garza Jr.

Non-title and one fall to a finish. It’s a huge brawl to start (of course) with Williams dropkicking Garza in the back of the head. Stop though, because GARZA HAS TO TAKE OFF HIS PANTS! Sydal comes back in to drop Xavier and Garza at the same time, followed by a standing moonsault for two on Dezmond. It’s Lee coming in to take Sydal down and we take a break.

Back with Lee getting kicked in the face by Dutt as we hear about THE EXACT SAME MATCH taking place at Bound For Glory. Not an Ultimate X match, not an elimination match, not even a match with tags etc. No, it’s the same match and it happens to be for a title. In other words, they had two chances to come up with an idea other than “throw everyone in there at once” and couldn’t manage to do so.

Dutt dives onto a pile of people at ringside, leaving Garza to hit a powerbomb on Xavier and a World’s Strongest Slam on Williams at the same time. That’s only good for two though as Sydal comes back in, only to have Petey hit the Canadian Destroyer for two. A powerbomb gives Lee two on Petey but Xavier comes back in with his moonsault kick to put Lee away at 11:30.

Rating: C+. That’s all well and good but, as announced during this match, NONE OF THIS MATTERS EVEN A LITTLE BIT. Yeah quite literally, this match will be repeated on Sunday with the title on the line. Watching the match happen was supposed to make me want to pay to see the match happen again. That’s what I’m sitting through with this company people. It’s not easy on Thursday nights.

Long recap of Team Impact vs. Team AAA.

Video on Gail Kim and the other women in the title match with her.

Here’s Gail Kim to talk about what her journey has meant to her. She’s ready for both opponents and promises to take the title back where it belongs as she ends her career.

Global Forged video.

We run down the pay per view card. Again.

Video on Eli Drake vs. Johnny Impact.

LAX/Eli Drake vs. OVE/Johnny Impact

The tag teams start brawling in the aisle before Impact shows up. Drake waits for Impact at the entrance and gets in a belt shot from behind. The beating is on outside the ring with the villains in full control. Johnny is finally thrown in where he has to take care of Adonis before we get an opening bell. Impact hits a big corkscrew dive to take out all of the bad guys and we take a break.

We come back joined in progress with Johnny superkicking Ortiz into a double spinebuster for two, only to have him come back with a flapjack. Jake gets beaten down in the corner and Santana gets belly to back suplexed for two. Drake’s over the shoulder powerslam drop gets two more and it’s time to plug a movie on Pop! Jake fights up and makes the hot tag as everything breaks down. A big flip dive sends Jake crashing onto Ortiz as we hear about LAX going to Germany. Is that where we’re going next week? Johnny sunset flips Santana for the pin at 5:13.

Rating: C-. Not enough time to mean much here but we’ve got important stuff like Canadian tag team matches to air instead of the World Title feud. Johnny pinning a member of LAX makes the most sense and sends him into the pay per view with some momentum, but there’s no hiding how unimportant the World Title match really is going into Sunday.

Post match the villains beat the winners down with Johnny being sent back first into an exposed buckle. Drake and Adonis pull back the mat and expose the wood, setting up a Gravy Train to leave Impact laying to end the show….at 9:57, with another Bound For Glory ad ending the show.

Overall Rating: D-. I don’t know what they were going for here but it really didn’t work. This taping cycle, which has now gone on over several months, has completely ruined their biggest show of the year. The fact that they can’t even fill in a two hour show every week without bringing in nothing matches (like that Moose tag) to cover the rest of their time shows what a mess this place is in.

You can give whatever excuses you want (it’s cheaper this way, it’s showcasing other promotions etc) but there’s a simple fact: GFW looks like a joke right now and that’s been the case with whatever you want to call this promotion for a very long time. At this point I’m wondering how many of the outsider teams are going to win on Sunday as you can almost guarantee at least one screwup of that nature.

I’m almost completely fed up with this company (again) as they’ve managed to turn this show into a showcase for the rest of the world without giving us a reason to care. If they can’t run a two hour show on their own (and I’m curious to see how they’re going to do that without the GFW talent), just stop running the thing already. I don’t want to watch Noah, I don’t want to watch the Crash, I don’t want to watch Border City Wrestling and I don’t want to watch Global Forged. I want the wrestlers I watch the show to see featured rather than thrown into cards around the world.

This promotion has been bad before but now they’re being bad in other countries and making me not want to see them either. How many times are the fans expected to just stick with it for the sake of loyalty to this place? We’re coming up on what is likely to be another two month long taping cycle and it’s likely going to be even more of a mess this time around. I’m so thrilled.

As for the show itself, it wasn’t a terrible go home show but how much other stuff could be built up in exchange for the Japan and Canada matches? It’s certainly not the worst I’ve ever seen (I’m sure TNA has put on a worse one before) but it comes at the end of one of the most miserable set of taping I can remember, which showed off every deficiency this place has, which is covering A LOT of ground. The worst part: Sunday’s show will likely be fine as the wrestlers will be fresh and just wrestling instead of trying to keep going when the energy is all gone. At least it’s finally something fresh, but that might make things even worse.

Results

Rosemary/Allie b. KC Spinelli/Sienna – German suplex to Sienna

Moose/Yuji Okabayashi b. Katsuhiko Nakajima/Masa Kitamiya – Top rope splash to Kitamiya

Dezmond Xavier b. Trevor Lee, Sonjay Dutt, Petey Williams, Matt Sydal and Garza Jr. – Moonsault kick to Lee

Johnny Impact/OVE b. Eli Drake/LAX – Sunset flip to Santana

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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