It’s the go home show for Breakdown which will see Undertaker/Kane vs. Austin in what amounts to a handicap match. Other than that there isn’t much to talk about, but we have a freshly face Rock and a rapidly turning face Mankind so things have to be pretty entertaining around here this week. Let’s get to it.

Whoa where are Jim and Jerry? I can live with this new team though. Kevin Kelly is there too.

We open with Rock coming to the ring to meet Vince, Mankind and Shamrock. Undertaker and Kane are standing on the ramp to prevent Austin from attacking Vince. Tonight it’s Austin/whoever wants to join him vs. Undertaker/Kane. As for the other three in the ring, he’s here to ensure that none of them are going to be Austin’s partner tonight. Why should any of them settle to be a partner when they could be the same as Undertaker or Kane? By that, Vince means any of them could be world champion. If they don’t help Austin, they can be in a triple threat match tonight and the winner gets a title match next week.

Billy Gunn vs. Jeff Jarrett

Roadie has a throat issue so Billy has to do the entrance, complete with a cue card for his own name. All of the outside people are sent out and Billy jumps Jeff to start things off. Jeff escapes the gorilla press and a dropkick gets two for Billy. There’s a six man tag on Sunday between DX and Jeff/Southern Justice. Jeff comes back with a pair of dropkicks There’s the gorilla press from Gunn but Jeff pops up and hits a top rope cross body for two. DDT gets the same. Jim and Jerry are filming Man on the Moon apparently.

Billy misses a cross body as Shane is more fired up than anyone Raw has had on commentary in years. Out to the floor with Jarrett in control, only to be sent into the post by Billy. That does nothing at all as it’s back to Jeff stomping on him. Jeff goes up and hits Billy in the back as we hear about a Women’s Title match tonight, which would be the first time the title had been active in almost three years.

Russian legsweep gets two for Jarrett. Piledriver by Billy is broken up with a backdrop and both guys are down. Fameasser (not yet named) puts Jarrett down but a Stinger Splash misses and Billy runs into the referee. The guitar is taken away though and Billy hits a neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing great here but it furthered the feud between the two groups and helped to set up the match on Sunday which is about all you can ask for in a match like this. Billy was decent in the ring but I don’t think anyone wanted to see him as a singles guy ever. Jarrett got better in a hurry too.

We go to the back and Vince says he has no idea who will team up with Austin but the match is happening no matter what.

Here’s Austin for a chat. Things are starting to look bad for him because Undertaker and Kane are back there making deals with Vince. Undertaker says this is just business Coming after the title though is automatically personal because it means you’re coming after him. As for Vince, Austin isn’t going to moan about those stipulations because he’ll fight Undertaker and Kane on his own if he has to, just like he’ll do on Sunday.

Earlier today Undertaker and Kane arrived. I figured that would be confirmed when we saw them here earlier but you can’t be too sure I guess.

Headbangers vs. Oddities

Silva and Golga in this case. The Headbangers spray something in the giants’ eyes and choke Golga out before ripping up the Cartman doll. Kurrgan gets beaten up as well. No match.

Undertaker tells Austin to cool off with his threats. Due to his and Kane’s deal with Vince, they’re getting the title match.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Jacqueline

Mero stays on the apron and distracts Sable so that Jackie can get in a shot to her back to take over. Jackie fires off some kicks into the ribs and a DDT gets two. She misses a crotch attack on the ropes though and Sable goes into catfight mode with a take down. Sable throws Jackie to the floor and knocks Mero off the apron as well. She suplexes Jackie back in but Mero holds the foot for the pin and the title for Jackie. I don’t think there’s a belt. Too short to rate but as usual Sable was bad in the ring.

Undertaker/Kane vs. Steve Austin/???

Before Austin gets in the ring, Billy Gunn comes out to be his partner. Ok then. Brawl to start with Kane hammering Billy to the floor. Austin and Taker start things off with Austin hitting the middle finger elbow. Off to Billy who has to stick and move. Taker misses a big boot and gets caught by a Fameasser for two. Back to Austin who sends Taker into the corner but gets clotheslined down.

Off to Kane but Austin fights back and tags in Billy. Chokeslam is broken up but Undertaker’s distraction allows Kane to knock him over the top. Billy is sent into the steps and we head back in. Taker comes in and beats on Billy but lowers his head so Billy can get in a boot. Taker looks at him and takes Billy’s head off again. Back to Kane who hits a big boot for two.

A regular clothesline sets up the top rope clothesline for two. Austin makes the save and flips off Kane. Well at least he’s multitasking. Billy and Kane hit a double clothesline and Gunn makes the tag to Austin. Stunner doesn’t work but the second attempt gets two on Kane due to a Taker save. Everything breaks down and the referee goes down. Chokeslam to Billy by Undertaker is good for the pin despite them both being legal.

Rating: C-. Standard main event style tag match here but I’m really not sure why they picked Billy Gunn of all people to be his partner. I know they lost all of the other main event players but still, Billy Gunn? Not HHH? Anyway, the match was fine but I really don’t know what it does for Sunday.

Austin clocks both guys with a chair post match.

Southern Justice vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

8-Ball and Mark start things off with 8-Ball getting two off a legdrop. Off to Knight and Skull with Skull taking his head off with a clothesline. Sidewalk slam gets two. They head to the floor and here’s Jarrett with a guitar shot to Ellering. The match just kind of stops.

Vince says Undertaker and Shane are going to take care of Billy Gunn later.

A REAL MAN’S MAN is coming.

Al Snow vs. Sgt. Slaughter

This is a boot camp match, which basically means a street fight. Before the match Snow does the questions about Head. If Snow wins he’s reinstated but if he loses he’s gone. Sarge jumps him and rips off Snow’s shirt as Cornette says that Snow is as crazy as a rainbow trout in a carwash. Snow comes back with a superkick and a slingshot into the post. Snow has Slaughter’s belt and whips the Sarge’s back and they go to the floor.

He gets a chair but his swing hits the post. A chair to the back of Snow gets two on the floor. Snow shrugs that off and hits something like Poetry in Motion up against the railing. A moonsault off the barricade only gets two. Cornette is just great on commentary, snapping off all kinds of analysis and insane things but staying entertaining the entire time. Snow goes up top with the chair but as he moonsaults with it, Sarge moves and Al hits canvas. Cobra Clutch goes on but Snow escapes. He breaks it up again with a low blow and Sarge takes off his boot. That goes nowhere and a shot with Head gets the pin for Al.

Rating: D. This was nothing but a way to finally give Al a reason to be around every week, even though he has been for like four months. Sarge is only so interesting and it was pretty clear that he wasn’t going to win here. I like Snow but this did nothing for me for the most part.

Patterson and Brisco run in post match for a beatdown on Snow but Scorpio makes the save.

Rock says he’ll be champion soon, that Mankind is a piece of trash and that Shamrock is proof that anyone can act tough.

Val Venis vs. Owen Hart

Dustin is on commentary. Val talks about cigars before the match. This was in the Lewinsky scandal so I think you know where this is going. Owen takes over to start as Shane taunts Dustin about his wife being in two adult films with Val. Owen pounds on Val some more and Dustin comes in for the DQ.

Val knocks him back and ties him up in the ropes. There’s a third video with her from Val which has Terri saying she was considering a reconciliation but has changed her mind.

European Title: X-Pac vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown is in the unusual position of having to use power here so he slams Pac down to take over. The legdrop hits but Brown poses too much. Brown misses a charge in the corner and Pac hits a spin kick, but the Bronco Buster misses and D’Lo takes over again. A middle rope moonsault misses Pac and he comes back with spinning kicks. There’s the Bronco Buster but Pac charges into the Sky High for a delayed two. Brown dives off the top but jumps right into the X-Factor to give Pac the title.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and for a midcard title like the European Title, it’s fine to make DX look even stronger. Also I’m glad they didn’t mention the Nation vs. DX feud as it’s been done for awhile now. Fun little match here and it worked pretty well. Pac would lose the title back pretty quickly though.

Mankind says he feels like the little engine that could. On his best early to mid-afternoon, he could beat Rock on his worst late evening. As for Shamrock, he knows a lot of holds and Mankind doesn’t know how to get out of any of them. It takes a very tough man to beat Mankind, but it certainly doesn’t take very long. I love this guy.

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock vs. Mankind

The winner gets a title shot next week. Rock and Mankind double team Shamrock to start but Mankind is the first to turn on his partner. They head to the floor but Shamrock hits a baseball slide to take out Foley. Foley comes back in the ring with the running knee to Shamrock’s head. Rock is down on the floor. Shamrock suplexes Mankind down so Rock comes in to pick their bones.

There’s the People’s Elbow but instead of covering, Rock throws Shamrock to the floor. He turns around and walks into a double arm DDT for two. Ken pulls Rock to the floor and sends him into the barricade. Back in, Mankind tries the Claw but Shamrock pounds away on his face. Shamrock has busted open Mankind’s left cheek. Rock comes in and it’s double/triple sleeper time. Foley comes back with the double jawbreaker and here come Vince, Kane and Undertaker.

Shamrock hits the belly to belly on Mankind and puts the ankle lock on him but Rock makes the save. Rock Bottom takes out Shamrock but this time Mankind makes the save. Shane hasn’t chilled out for the entire show which is both annoying and good at the same time. Undertaker pulls Mankind to the floor and the monsters beat him down. Rock hits his spinning DDT on Shamrock for two. Ken comes back with a standing rana and a powerslam for two. Shamrock gets sent to the floor and the monsters beat on him too. They get in the ring and beat down Rock so the match is thrown out somewhere in there.

Rating: C. I think it was pretty clear we weren’t getting a clean ending here and that’s ok. This was playing into the theme of drama all night long and that makes for a pretty interesting show most of the time. These three would have a cage match eventually with the winner getting a title shot, so at least we would get a winner there.

Post match Undertaker and Kane beat up Foley some more, which allows Austin to sneak up on Vince and beat him up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one where your taste will vary greatly. We’ve reached the point of soap opera Raws, as each show turns out to be a small piece of a huge story that won’t be revealed for months. That being said, it’s very interesting to see where these turns take us and it’s easy to see how this show was so successful. It would get better soon too.

Here’s Breakdown if you’re interested:

This is another request and since it’s taking forever to download some TNA shows, I figured I might as well knock some of these off in the meantime. This is the King of the Ring tournament so it’s a three hour special. Almost everything you have here is a tournament match, plus an eight man tag and a REALLY stupid other match. Let’s get to it.

Theme song gets us going. It’s still Papa Roach.

We open with Lillian telling us that the tournament is back tonight.

King of the Ring First Round: Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Jericho is IC Champion and MVP is US Champion. There’s no bracket yet and even JR and Lawler haven’t seen them. I don’t mind a champion losing so much here as one of them gets to look stronger. This is also the go home show for Backlash, which is a show I haven’t done yet. MVP takes him to the mat to start but Jericho comes back with some knees to the head and a kick to the same area.

MVP punches him in the corner as this is off to a hot start. Jericho drapes him over the top rope and mostly misses a baseball slide to the floor. MVP catches him coming back in with a knee lift and a kind of clothesline for two. He hooks kind of a modified abdominal stretch on the mat but Jericho gets up pretty quickly. Overhead belly to belly puts Jericho down for two. They do the Flair bridge up into a backslide spot which gets a good reaction in Horsemen country. Big boot gets two for MVP. Jericho comes back with a clothesline but the Lionsault misses. Play of the Day is countered into the Walls and Jericho advances.

Rating: C. Very basic match here but with a one night tournament you have to keep things that way. Again I don’t mind MVP losing clean here because it was to another champion and on top of that he would drop the title on Sunday anyway. Not much to see here but it was fine all things considered.

Jericho sits on the throne post match.

King of the Ring First Round: CM Punk vs. Matt Hardy

Punk has the MITB case. Feeling out process to start but it turns into a strike off, won by Punk. He takes Matt down for two and hooks a quick chinlock. Matt comes back with some headbutts and drives an elbow into Punk’s back off the middle rope. Matt’s bulldog is countered into the clothesline and bulldog out of the corner for two. Punk’s springboard clothesline is caught in the Side Effect for two. Twist of Fate is countered into a GTS which is countered into a sunset flip which is countered by Punk sitting on Hardy for the pin. Nice ending.

Rating: C+. Another short match here but this one was a little more fun than the previous one. The ending was pretty quick and that’s a good thing as it was certainly entertaining for a four minute match. Punk was on a roll at this point and he would win the world title in about two months. Matt would get the US Title on Sunday.

All we have as far as a bracket is Jericho vs. Punk in the semi-finals.

Tonight it’s Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. That’s the really stupid match I warned you about. We see it in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008 for a preview.

We get a clip from Raw last week of HHH vs. JBL when Orton ran in and HHH got double teamed. The fatal fourway on Sunday (those three plus Cena) is now an elimination match.

JBL says this Sunday he’ll take his place on top of the WWE. He was in the New York Times today.

King of the Ring First Round: Finlay vs. Great Khali

Khali is having issues with Big Show around this time. Horny is at ringside of course. Finlay charges at Khali but gets shoved down almost immediately. Khali shoves him down but misses a legdrop. Finlay pounds away but Khali shrugs him off and sends him to the corner. Horny comes in with the club but Finlay saves him. The chop puts Finlay down and Khali wraps Finlay’s leg around the post…..for a DQ? Apparently so. Too short to rate but this was nothing of note.

Big Show comes out but Khali won’t go for him until Sunday.

Finlay is helped out because of the knee attack.

King of the Ring First Round: William Regal vs. Hornswoggle

Twenty seconds, Regal Stretch. Finlay comes in to help but Regal beats him down and attacks the knee. Regal is GM at this point so shenanigans seem to be up.

The brackets are set for the semi-finals:

Jericho
Punk

Finlay
Regal

Video on the annual post Wrestlemania European tour.

Here’s Shawn for a little chat. Apparently Batista isn’t happy about Shawn retiring Flair at Wrestlemania so Shawn wants to talk about it right now. They have a match on Sunday with Jericho as referee for no apparent reason, although it would set up a six month feud between Shawn and Jericho. Here’s Batista and Shawn if Batista wanted to face Flair at Mania, which is what Jericho suggested on Smackdown.

Batista asks if that would make Shawn feel better. This isn’t about Flair anymore, but rather about Big Dave and Shawn. He respects where Shawn is, but not how he got there. He’ll finish this with Shawn at Backlash. Shawn appreciates the honesty but he’s everything Batista says he is. Whether Dave likes it or not, Shawn is Mr. Wrestlemania and there definitely is blood on his hands. Batista is going to need luck on Sunday. Shawn goes to leave but Batista spins him back around. Shawn gets into superkick position but Batista just walks past him and leaves.

Hilary Clinton gives the kind of promo/speech that a famous person gives when they talk to a wrestling audience that they don’t understand. This one isn’t terrible though as she mainly talks about how she’ll fight for America and lists some of her issues. It’s very corny, but I’ll give them points for at least talking like this. Obama and McCain will talk later.

Hardcore Holly vs. Carlito

Just….why? Oh this is something to do with the tag titles. Holly and Rhodes are champions coming into this. Carlito has his partner Santino with him. Feeling out process to start with Holly mainly in control. Carlito comes back with a backbreaker for two. Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long. Carlito works on the back some more but misses a charge. Holly makes his comeback with clotheslines and the dropkick but his back gives out. He loads up the Alabama Slam but his back gives out again. Backstabber gets the pin.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much. This would presumably set up the match on Sunday but it didn’t happen for some reason. Then again, no one cared at all about the tag titles so it’s not like anyone cared. This was really just a breather to allow everyone to transition from the first half of the show to the second.

HHH says he’ll win.

King of the Ring Semi-Finals: Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

Both guys are tentative to start but both get quick twos. The first big move is Jericho draping him over the top rope out of a suplex. Punk tries a springboard but Jericho kicks his legs out and Punk is in trouble. Jericho tries a hammerlock but Punk takes his head off with a clothesline for two. They trade rollups like at the end of Punk’s other match but no one gets a pin. Walls are countered into a rollup for two.

Jericho hits an enziguri for two and this is getting good. Punk snaps off a powerslam for two. GTS is countered into the bulldog and Jericho loads up the Lionsault. It looks strange as Jericho tried to land on all fours because Punk had his knees up. Either way he stopped himself and hooks the Walls but Punk makes a rope. Jericho goes up but Punk high kicks him down. He puts Jericho on his shoulders and the GTS sends Punk to the finals clean.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and this was no exception. Punk got a win here which made him look a lot stronger, which is what someone like Jericho is great at. Even four years later Jericho is still putting people over but it still means something, which is a great sign for a veteran like him.

Senator Obama gives a very corny speech, concluding with “do you smell what the Barack is cooking.” Just….no.

King of the Ring Semi-Finals: William Regal vs. Finlay

Finlay has the bad knee coming in. Regal circles him to start but gets monkey flipped to the floor. Regal sends him into the steps and he hits knee first. Back in the ring and it’s time for a slugout. Regal goes shoulder first into the post for two. Finlay tries a fireman’s carry but the knee gives out. Back to the forearms and a rollup gets two. Regal hits him in the head with a knee and puts on the Regal Stretch. Finlay passes out to send Regal to the finals.

Rating: C. These two always have good matches as they’re always physical. The more I see of Finlay the more I appreciate him as he was really good at stuff like this. There was nothing for him to lose out there and he was going to be adequate at worst no matter who you put him out there with. Good stuff but short.

McCain uses a lot of wrestling lines and says go vote.

We run down the card for Backlash.

Cena says that you’ve heard everyone talk tonight and he has as good a chance as anyone else, but the advantage he has is he doesn’t have to go through himself.

Let’s get this over with.

Hilary Clinton vs. Barack Obama

There’s a Bill impersonator with Hilary, who comes out to Real American. No one reacts AT ALL. Obama comes out to Rock’s theme and I guess is the face in this. They’re impersonators in case you didn’t get that. It’s so weird seeing and hearing people not care at all about Hogan’s music. I mean there’s NOTHING. This is one of those times I feel ashamed about being a wrestling fan. They both cut promos on each other and Hilary’s is far better, as she’s played by a chick from SHIMMER. The fans still don’t care.

Is this supposed to be funny? Are we supposed to be this stupid to find this entertaining? Rock’s theme gets ZERO reaction either and Obama has huge ears. King gets the only funny line of this by saying that if Obama were facing Mike Tyson in this it would be a buffet. They have a “match” which isn’t completely terrible as both are played by wrestlers. Obama hits a Rock Bottom but Bill breaks up the People’s Elbow. Cue Umaga for a Spike to Obama and a Samoan Drop to Hilary. Bill runs away. This got TEN MINUTES.

Here are a bunch of face Divas to introduce the new Women’s Champion Mickie James. She beat Beth who was considered unbeatable so it was a big upset. It still amazes me how much more interesting the Divas were just a few years ago. Mickie thanks the other girls but gets cut off by Beth and some other evil girls. Remember when there were twelve Divas that could be in one segment and could all have at least a passable match? Beth says it’s not if she’ll win the title back, but when she’ll win it back. Michelle slaps Beth and the brawl is on.

Mr. Kennedy is coming back.

King of the Ring Finals: William Regal vs. CM Punk

Punk comes in with bad ribs because of the matches earlier. Regal is basically in his second match after the Horny match and beating an injured Finlay. Punk starts off fast with some kicks in the corner. He tries the bulldog but gets suplexed down and it’s off to a bow and arrow hold. Punk fights up from that and hits a spinning kick to the knee.

Regal grabs the arms and forces him right back down to the mat as is his custom. The idea is that it’s strikes vs. grapples which is about as natural as you’re going to get with these two. Punk fights up again and hits a BIG kick to the head to stagger Regal. Spinning backfist sets up the high kick for two. That sounded great. Punk loads up the GTS but Regal grabs the rope. He escapes and hits the knee trembler, followed by the Stretch. Punk hangs on for almost thirty seconds but finally has to tap to give Regal the tournament.

Rating: C-. This was too short to mean much but it gave Regal some more psychosis to work with which was a really entertaining time. Then it just stopped cold because it was getting too good and that’s how WWE works. Punk giving up because of the rib injury is ok because Regal didn’t win fairly (coming in at a big advantage), which is fine.

Regal’s psycho look while he sits on the throne is still great.

Here’s Orton for the main event but first he brags about how awesome he is and how his title reign will continue after Sunday.

Randy Orton/Edge/Chavo Guerrero/John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena/HHH/Kane/The Undertaker

Orton is Raw champion, Edge is challenging Taker on Sunday, Chavo is challenging Kane, JBL is challenging Orton, Cena is challenging Orton, HHH is challenging Orton, Kane is ECW Champion, Undertaker is Smackdown champion. Now that’s a packed main event. How out of place does Chavo look here though? After the entrances take forever to get through we’re ready to go. Seriously, there were ten minutes spent on entrances PLUS a commercial. That’s ridiculous.

Taker and Orton look to start but Edge jumps Taker in a surprise. This goes badly for the Canadian as a big clothesline puts him down. Old School hits (hasn’t that been called old longer than it wasn’t called old?) and we take a break after 40 seconds. Back with Chavo tagging Edge in to work over a downed HHH. The spear is countered into a spinebuster and there’s the tag to Cena.

He starts his finishing sequence very quickly on Edge but Chavo low bridges him on the Shuffle attempt. JBL throws him back in clean which shocks Jerry. Off to Orton who does nothing so it’s JBL again. Russian legsweep gets two as does a clothesline. Edge comes in and the Cena chants begin. Edge gets a big boot and it’s off to Orton for a chinlock. Cena stands up but it’s a double clothesline and both guys are down.

The tags are made to Chavo and Kane with the Big Bald cleaning house. All of the evil team goes down and a side slam puts Chavo down. The top rope clothesline mostly gets shoulder and everything breaks down. Chavo counters a slam attempt into a DDT but as he goes for the Frog Splash Kane chokeslams him down. Out of nowhere though Edge spears Kane for the pin.

Rating: C. It’s a main event tag match and that’s about it. They covered almost everything and they had the most secure winner at the PPV (Kane) take the fall which is a good thing. Not a bad match but it’s just a way to throw everyone into the main event at once, which is fine for building up the PPV main events.

Edge takes an FU post match, HHH takes the Clothesline, RKO to HHH and a double chokeslam to JBL and Orton. Undertaker stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a really entertaining show that went by fast. I’d have liked to see some better wrestling in there but the matches had to be fast due to the tournament. I’m glad they didn’t go to any double eliminations as in an eight man tournament that’s kind of excessive. Good show though and I want to watch Backlash now so that’s a great sign. Good stuff.

Remember to like this on Facebook and follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

This is the first show after Extreme Rules and Sheamus has retained the title against Daniel Bryan. Other than that there isn’t much other than Orton beating Kane in the falls count anywhere match. Sheamus needs a new challenger now and all signs point to it being Del Rio which is nothing that I’m interested in but this is WWE so who cares? Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is whatever lunkhead turned on the lights in the middle of the Avengers.

Here’s Sheamus to open things up. He says he’s doing what he loves to do: fight. He doesn’t care where he is, because he just loves fighting. Bryan almost tore his shoulder off at Extreme Rules so tonight, Bryan can try to finish it. He was asked if he wanted to fight Bryan, and his answer was YES. Sheamus starts a YES chant and here comes Bryan for a gimmick infringement complaint. Sheamus says YES probably 40 times here, which is probably a record.

Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

This is non-title I think. Sheamus tries for a headlock as Bryan goes for the arm. Bryan takes it to the mat but Sheamus fires off a punch to break that up. A single arm DDT takes Sheamus down as Booker breaks his vow from a few weeks back and calls him D. Bry. Off to an armbar but Sheamus gets up pretty quickly. He comes with the power and starts pounding Bryan down in the corner. A running knee lift sends Bryan to the floor but Ricardo Rodriguez jumps off the top onto Sheamus for the DQ at 2:48. This was an angle rather than a match.

Del Rio comes in with the cross armbreaker and Bryan throws on the YES Lock to leave Sheamus laying. Bryan yells at Del Rio as referees hold back Sheamus.

After a break Sheamus is getting his arm looked at.

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Hunico/Camacho

Epico, Primo, AW and Rosa watch from the ramp. AW has officially signed the former champs. Truth and Hunico start things off with Hunico slapping Little Jimmy. Is that child abuse? Off to Kofi who comes in off a springboard clothesline for two. Kofi gets sent to the apron and Hunico gets in a shot to send him outside. Camacho gets in a clothesline on the floor and Hunico adds the hilo for two.

Camacho comes in and gets two off a legdrop. Back to Hunico who comes in with a slingshot dropkick to Kofi who is seated in the corner. A monkey flip by Kofi sets up the hot tag and Truth comes in with the pelvic thrusts. Lie Detector gets two on Camacho and everything breaks down. A rana sends Hunico and Kofi to the floor so the Little Jimmy can get the pin at 4:09.

Rating: D+. Nothing tag match but I guess it set up the idea of Primo/Epico continuing the feud with Kofi/Truth. Wait did I just call that a feud? It means that sometime there’s going to be another tag title match and a probably house show program. Can we just look at Rosa some more instead?

Brodus Clay vs. Jack Swagger

Brodus hits a quick belly to belly suplex for two and runs Swagger over with ease. Ziggler offers a distraction and Jack hits something like a spear to take over. Ziggler tries something off the steps but runs into the headbutt. Back in the ring the suplex looks to set up the splash but Jack rolls to the floor and takes the countout at 1:43.

More annoying kids get to dance with Brodus post match.

Video on the Cena vs. Lesnar match on Sunday. This transitions into the end of Raw where Ace revealed himself as Cena’s next opponent.

Del Rio and Bryan are arguing in the back and Eve has to break it up. Ace is taking a day off for some reason so she and those great glasses of hers are in charge. Bryan wants to continue his match with Sheamus and she says maybe. Eve throws both of them out.

Damien Sandow vs. Derrick Bateman

Sandow comes out to the Hallelujah Chorus and in a Bob Backlund robe and towel. He’s introduced as the Intellectual Savior of the Masses. Sandow says that he won’t do anything here tonight because it won’t teach the masses anything, so he’s out of here.

Bateman wants the match he earned the right to on NXT. We have a replacement for him.

Ryback vs. Derrick Bateman

Ryback has some pyro now. Booker thinks of Devastation Inc. when he looks at Ryback. There’s a stable I never want to think of again. Big boot, Over the Shoulder Boulder Holder, clothesline, MuscleBuster, 1:11.

Kane/Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton/Big Show

Cody and Randy get us going. Cody goes into the buckle quickly and cowers away from Show. The big bald comes in to crush Cody in the corner and brings back Randy. A knee drop gets two as does a dropkick. Off to Kane for a slugout with Orton and the Viper is in trouble. Kane sends him into the corner and it’s off to Big Show. He comes in with a spear to Kane and takes down Cody as well.

Kane gets a DDT to Big Show and we take a break. Back with Cody stomping on the former champion and then tagging Kane back in. The low dropkick gets two and it’s time for the chinlock. Show comes back with a belly to back suplex and it’s the hot (I guess?) tag to Orton. He powerslams Cody but Kane breaks up the elevated DDT.

Instead it’s the Big Fried Freak taking the DDT and Randy sets up the RKO. Kane shoves him off and Cody low bridges Orton to the floor. Kane follows him out and hits a big boot which gets two. Back to Rhodes for some knee drops and a dropkick for two. Kane comes in again and walks into the backbreaker.

A clothesline breaks up the hot tag and the champ is in again. Cody hooks a quick chinlock and tries Cross Rhodes but Orton shoves him off. There’s the tag to Big Show who cleans house. Kane breaks up the chokeslam with the top rope clothesline but Orton hits an RKO on the masked one. WMD gets the pin on Rhodes at 10:47 shown of 14:17.

Rating: C. Just a run of the mill tag match here which didn’t really change anything. The champion gets pinned by the same guy that has beaten him on multiple occasions already so Rhodes looks even weaker. Orton and Kane would seem to be through but they keep at it here again. There might be a match at Over the Limit but Orton has already won two matches against him so I don’t know if I’d get the point.

Post match we’re told that Big Show will get his rematches at live events this weekend. There’s a rarity.

Sheamus is taped up and says he’s fighting tonight.

Layla vs. Natalya

They go to the mat and it’s a standoff. Natalya works on the arm and hits a discus lariat for two. Abdominal stretch goes on but Layla gets a sweet rolling counter for two. Layout ends this quickly at 1:58. Layla is more interesting than most of the other girls but giving her two minutes a night isn’t going to get anyone anywhere.

Antonio Cesaro and Aksana are taking publicity photos in the back under Eve’s supervision. She thinks Antonio needs oil and makes Teddy put it on. Teddy says no but does it eventually.

Alicia and Kaitlyn are standing around doing nothing when AJ comes up. Alicia leaves and AJ asks for Kaitlyn’s forgiveness. Kaitlyn says she felt betrayed and was just trying to be her friend. She tells AJ to stop feeling sorry for herself and earns another slap.

Raw ReBound is about HHH vs. Lesnar.

Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Del Rio is on commentary. Sheamus’ shoulder is taped up. There sure are a lot of arm injuries floating around this company lately. Sheamus basically has to fight from his right side here. He shoves Bryan down and fires off some elbows in the corner. Bryan comes back with a kick to the shoulder to take control. Sheamus keeps trying to play defense so Bryan keeps going for the arm.

Sheamus manages a tilt-a-whirl slam but the Brogue Kick is ducked and he falls to the floor. We take a break and come back with Bryan hitting the running knee off the apron. Back inside Bryan ties the arm up in the ropes and kicks Sheamus down to the floor. The shoulder goes into the post and back inside a Swan Dive to the shoulder gets two. The tape is ripped off now and Sheamus is in trouble.

Bryan drives knees into the shoulder and hooks both arms on the mat. The champ tries to fire off some elbows to the head but can’t break through. Bryan goes to send him into the post but Sheamus reverses to send Bryan’s shoulder in and give himself a breather. Here are the forearms to the chest and a suplex back in gets two. Bryan charges into the Irish Curse with the left (the bad) arm for two.

Sheamus goes after Daniel but gets his arm draped over the rope. A missile dropkick gets two and Bryan is frustrated. Sheamus hits the double ax out of nowhere and loads up the Cross but here’s Del Rio for a distraction. He doesn’t interfere though so it isn’t a DQ. Bryan tries to sneak in the YES Lock but Sheamus shoves him into Del Rio. Sheamus sends Alberto to the floor and Bryan goes up. That goes badly though as he dives into the Brogue Kick (most of one at least) for the pin at 9:25 shown of 12:55.

Rating: B-. This was a different kind of match than Sunday but it was still good. I don’t get the point in having Bryan get beaten again when you had Del Rio interfering already. Just go with the DQ and set up the next title feud that way instead of taking away some of Bryan’s momentum. Still though, another good match between these two who have good chemistry.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all about transitioning over to Sheamus vs. Del Rio and that worked to a degree. At the same time though, they did it at the expense of Bryan who is going to be getting a world title match at the PPV so that wasn’t the best idea. Other than that though, nothing really happened on this show. Nothing was bad and the tag match was ok, but it’s pretty much a forgettable show other than the main event stuff, which is ok.

Results
Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan via DQ when Ricardo Rodriguez interfered
Kofi Kingston/R-Truth b. Hunico/Camacho – Little Jimmy to Camacho
Brodus Clay b. Jack Swagger via countout
Ryback b. Derrick Bateman – MuscleBuster
Randy Orton/Big Show b. Cody Rhodes/Kane – WMD to Rhodes
Layla b. Natalya – Layout
Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick

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We’re in Detroit tonight and the challenger of the week is Kane in an Extreme Rules match. That’s an interesting idea as there’s no better way to have someone built up as a monster than by having them run through people, especially when the regular roster has nothing they could throw at him for a reasonable challenge yet. Also tonight there’s more in the Knox vs. Sandman feud which I’m sure you’re all dying for. Let’s get to it.

After a quick intro about Show vs. Kane we hit the theme song.

Knox and Sandman are in the ring to start and Knox gives us a montage of Kelly’s dances. However, Kelly can never take her clothes off again after the cane shot last week, which we see. Knox claims that he didn’t abandon Kelly but rather was in the back getting the EMTs.

Mike Knox vs. Sandman

Sandman busts himself open with a beer can on the way to the ring. Knox goes off on Sandman with right hands but Sandman comes back with the legsweep. He gets the cane and goes to swing it at Knox but Kelly gets in the way. Sandman stops himself but Test comes in for the DQ win for Sandman.

Dreamer jumps Knox and Test in the back.

Heyman is talking to Sabu (kind of) and says that Sabu won’t get the title match he wants with Show. Heyman tells Sabu to leave. He keeps walking and runs into Guido, who he yells at for doing nothing. The security guards beat him up and Heyman says Guido’s match is next.

CM Punk says he hasn’t been handed anything. He’s from the streets and he debuts next week.

The Vampire vs. Little Guido

The Vampire would later be known as Kevin Thorn. Guido is dragged to the ring by the security guards. The Vampire destroys Guido and Ariel the tarot card girl gets on the apron and sucks his fingers. A modified powerbomb puts Guido down again and an elevated Stunner (think Orton’s DDT) kills him. Razor’s Edge ends this. Guido never got his vest off.

Video on Kane.

Shannon Moore still has nothing to say.

Justin Credible vs. Balls Mahoney

Balls starts fast and pounds Justin into the corner. Off to a neck crank as Tazz and Joey talk about how insane Mahoney is. Justin tries to run but gets caught by the ears. Back in Justin drops some legs and a running release tornado DDT for two. Northern lights suplex gets two.

Off to a kindof seated abdominal stretch and then to a regular knee to the back chinlock. Balls hooks a suplex to get out of it and the punches get two. Justin tries a slide into the corner but crotches himself on the post. He whips Mahoney into the corner and dropkicks him into the referee. A reverse DDT hits but there’s no referee for Justin so he goes and gets a chair. Balls steals the chair and clocks Credible with it for the DQ.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much of anything and the ending didn’t help it. For some reason Credible was a total jobber in ECW despite being a long reigning world champion in the original incarnation. Mahoney was mainly a tag wrestler but was getting a pretty significant push in this version. He’s more interesting though so I can’t complain there.

Mahoney clocks the referee with the chair post match.

Show wants to know why he can’t fight Sabu. Heyman says don’t worry about it.

Vote in the Diva Search! If there was a mention of something like that in the original ECW, riots would break out.

Angle is back next week.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Big Show

Kane fires off some clotheslines but is thrown up and over to the floor on the third attempt. Oh and this is Extreme Rules. Kane sends him into the post and throws some weapons into the ring. Show knocks him back down and we take a break. Back with Kane down in the ring and Show stalking him. Kane gets up and hits a chair shot to take Show down. The chair is wedged between the ropes in the corner and Kane slugs away.

According to the laws of wrestling, Kane goes face first into the chair that he set up. Show goes up for a Vader Bomb but Kane hits him low and a belly to back superplex puts both guys down. They slap it out from their knees and then punch it out on their feet. Kane knocks him into the corner and hits a running clothesline. He lost his elbow pads in this somewhere.

Here comes a chokeslam but Show grabs one of his own which only gets two. Not much of a surprise on the kickout either, as in the crowd didn’t seem to care. Show gets a table and sets it up on the floor and then a second one. He sets for a suplex over the top but Kane guillotines him on the top rope. A trio of chair shots knocks Show off the apron and through the tables.

Heyman and the security come out to try to tell Show that he needs to shake it off. I think Show is busted open. Kane tries to get Show back in the ring and DANG that’s a good cut. Kane goes up but jumps into a chokeslam but Kane counters into a DDT for two. Heyman put the foot under the rope to break it up so Kane goes after the boss. That allows Show to hit Kane in the back with a chair and chokeslam him onto it to retain.

Rating: B-. WAY better than I was expecting here as it was about beating each other up which is the whole appeal of battles of monsters like this. Kane moved around in this and his power was enough to make you believe that a title change was possible. It was very unlikely but it was possible. Good match and a nice surprise.

Sabu comes in and lays out Big Show with a variety of chair shots.

Overall Rating: C. This was one of the first times where you could feel part of a running story throughout the show which is what this show has been lacking. Until now it’s come off as more like a collection of segments and then a long main event. Now we’re actually getting some stories together and the show is a lot more interesting as a result.

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Finally we’re back on Mondays and it’s time to get ready for Breakdown. We have this and one more show before then and THANK GOODNESS the big names are back tonight. I couldn’t take another week like we had the previous two shows with all of the DQ’s and then the B level talent two days before this. The card is interesting looking tonight so let’s get to it.

Here’s Austin to open the show. Vince, Taker and Kane are already in the ring without having entrances televised. That’s something you don’t see every day. Vince says cut the music and goes into a rant about how he’s tired of seeing that title on Austin’s shoulder. On September 27 (notice that Vince keeps saying the date instead of just the name. That’s very important in building a show) there’s a triple threat match with Austin defending against both Brothers of Destruction.

Vince says he’ll never forget all of the stuff Austin has done to them. He says that he’s scratched the monsters’ back so now they’ll be watching his. If Austin goes after Vince at all, either one or both of them will be all over Austin immediately. Also at the PPV, Undertaker can’t pin Kane and Kane can’t pin Undertaker.

Vince flat out says it’s two on one because Austin won’t do things the easy way. Stone Cold screwed Stone Cold. That’s enough for Austin and he goes after Vince but the monsters jump him. They finish him with a double chokeslam. While on the ramp, Taker says it’s just business. Vince adds that it’s Austin defending against Shamrock later tonight.

Austin is mad after a break.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Road Dogg

Billy has braids in his hair in case he didn’t look stupid enough already. We actually get clips of the Roadie days. Jarrett jumps him to start but he slides between Roadie’s legs and walks into the Shake Rattle and Roll for two. A back elbow puts Jarrett down and the shaky kneedrop gets two. Road Dogg goes to the corner for ten punches, with Jeff’s face towards the crowd. That’s a new one. Jarrett comes back but crotches himself on the middle rope. Southern Justice pulls Road Dogg to the floor for a beatdown so Billy and Pac come running. The distraction lets Jeff hit the guitar shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much here but it’s cool to see some people with history together out there together. I’m not sure what they were going with here by pushing Jarrett over DX but I think it was supposed to wind up with Jarrett getting a main event heel push but Austin put the brakes on that hard and you don’t argue with Austin in 1998. Southern Justice only had about two weeks left on Raw.

We get a clip from Heat last night where Shamrock called out Austin and challenged him for a title match anywhere anytime.

Road Dogg is put into an ambulance due to a guitar shot to the throat.

Kane vs. The Rock

In the back Rock is giving the Nation instructions but it turns into an argument so finally Rock says he’ll do this himself. They slug it out to start and Rock gets knocked to the floor. He grabs Kane’s leg and rams it into the apron and steps but he can’t keep Kane down. Kane powerslams him down and the fans are totally behind Rock here. Another slam sets up the top rope clothesline for two.

Rock avoids an elbow drop and hits the spinning DDT to get the fans back into it. Kane sits up but Rock punches Kane down in the corner. Neckbreaker gets two. The referee gets bumped and Rock hits the People’s Elbow. Undertaker jumps in and beats up Rocky, throwing him to the floor. Mankind comes in with a sledgehammer and blasts Kane in the back of the head with it, giving Rock the pin.

Rating: C. If he wasn’t already, the Rock was just turned face. His match at Summerslam was such a show stealer that the fans couldn’t help but cheer him. Thankfully WWF picked up on that and ran with it, unlike today where they seem incapable of listening to their audience the majority of the time. The match was pretty decent too.

Undertaker says this ends tonight with Mankind, and he can bring the sledgehammer.

Mankind says he’s been working on some scientific moves so he’d be glad to accept Undertaker’s offer to a fair fight.

Here’s Dustin Runnels to complain about how horrible this place is anymore. Someone is still coming apparently. Cue Val Venis for some innuendo. He has a new video for Dustin called The Preacher’s Wife, which is him in bed with his wife Terri. Dustin breaks down and falls to his knees. Val: “I guess getting on your knees runs in the family.”

We see the REAL MAN’S MAN Steven Regal chopping down a tree. No song unfortunately.

Intercontinental Title: HHH vs. Owen Hart

They fight over wrist control to start with Owen doing his counter to the wristlock with the flip and nipup in it. Clothesline gets two for the champion. HHH runs the ropes a bit but walks into a belly to belly to give Owen control. Small package gets two for the future Game but he gets caught by an enziguri for two. Powerslam gets the same. HHH comes back with a leg sweep and some clotheslines. Facebuster gets two. The spinning heel kick from Owen looks to set up the Sharpshooter but Henry and Chyna get in a fight. The distraction allows HHH to hit the Pedigree to retain.

Rating: C+. Did Owen ever get a fair pin over HHH? If he did I certainly can’t remember it. This furthers the idea of the Nation having problems which would result in a breakup soon after this. HHH would get hurt pretty soon and have to forfeit the title if I remember correctly. This was more about the stuff outside though.

Henry challenges Chyna and X-Pac to a handicap match which is accepted.

Mankind loads up weapons into a dumpster while singing It’s Off To Work We Go.

Mankind vs. The Undertaker

Mankind brings a dumpster full of weapons which he sets up around the ring. They both have sledgehammers so Mankind grabs the Claw to make Undertaker drop his. They immediately go to the floor and Taker is slammed into the side of the dumpster. There’s a ladder but Taker gets in a shot and works on the hands of Foley. He crushes the left hand between the steps and throws Foley through a table. They finally get back in the ring and Taker punches him down.

Back to the outside and Mankind manages a Stunner onto the top rope, losing his mask in the process. Undertaker kicks him into the side of the dumpster and puts Mankind against the steps. He swings the sledgehammer at Mankind’s head but due to wanting to avoid death, Foley moves. Kane chokeslams Mankind through the table and they go back in. Taker has the hammer so Mankind grabs a chair.

Taker kicks the chair into his face and chokeslams Foley. I’m pretty sure the match is thrown out at this point. Tombstone on a chair leaves Foley dead. He grabs the hammer but Rock pops out of the dumpster to save Foley and draw the Brothers away. How did Rock know when to pop out or what was going on outside?

Rating: C. It was a mess but these two are always worth looking at. This would continue the Rock’s turn and make Undertaker look like a complete psycho, thereby furthering his heel turn instead of being a tweener. It wasn’t really a match and it didn’t really have an ending, but it was entertaining enough.

Gangrel vs. Edge

Edge comes off the top rope and pounds on Gangrel to start. Downward Spiral is blocked and Gangrel goes up, only to get caught in a front falling electric chair drop. A German suplex is countered into a modified belly to belly by Gangrel for two. Edge comes out of the corner with a neckbreaker but a swan dive misses. Impaler is countered and they go to the floor. Edge tries a plancha but Gangrel moves, sending Edge crashing down. The Impaler on the floor knocks Edge out and the match is thrown out.

Rating: C-. Nothing much here but it’s always cool to see someone like Edge when they’re just getting started. The real explanation of these two was never given but it was clearly something about vampires or whatever. Gangrel never quite clicked in WWF but that’s probably because he was hanging out with guys like Edge and eventually Christian, which would make almost anyone look inferior.

X-Pac/Chyna vs. Mark Henry

X-Pac starts but gets shoved to the floor. D-Lo comes out to counteract HHH. Jarrett and Southern Justice come out just after Brown, giving us a total of eight people in the arena for this. HHH grabs a chair as Pac tries to suplex Henry. Chyna comes in to help and they THROW Henry over in a suplex. That looked awesome. Pac gets in some kicks before tagging in Chyna for a spear. A single forearm puts Henry down and it’s back to Pac. Another spin kick sets up the Bronco Buster but Brown grabs Chyna’s leg. Pac takes him out and Chyna goes up. She jumps into a powerslam and gets pinned. Too short to rate but it was ok.

Sable vs. Jacqueline

Evening gown match. Before the match we get a clip from 1995 with the Fink vs. Harvey Whippelman in a tuxedo match. Sable kicks her in the ribs a few times and rips a strap off the gown. Total squash with Sable pounding on her, powerbombing her and stripping her. This was nothing.

Sable strips her own gown off post match.

Shamrock says Austin will be the next victory for him.

WWF World Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Austin

Austin goes right for him and the fight is on. Shamrock takes him down and they go to the mat. Ken goes for the ankle but Austin bails to the floor and gets his shirt off. He pulls Shamrock to the mat and wraps it around the post. A suplex sets up a headlock by Austin as the match slows way down. Back to their feet and Shamrock hits a heel kick and a quick suplex for two. Austin powerbombs him out of a rana and adds a middle rope elbow for two.

Back to the chinlock as Austin keeps slowing things down. It’s not a bad thing I guess but it’s uncharacteristic for Austin. He tries a Boston Crab but Shamrock spins him off. There’s a sleeper but it’s quickly broken up. They go up to the corner and Shamrock headbutts him down to the mat. He jumps off but Austin punches him out of the air. Back to the chinlock but Shamrock comes back, only to get thrown to the floor.

Austin follows him out and loads up a piledriver, only to get backdropped onto the concrete. Back inside Shamrock pounds him down in the corner and chokes Austin on the mat. There’s the Boston Crab but Austin makes a rope. Austin gets the rope and stomps Shamrock down into the corner. They collide in the middle….and here are Undertaker and Kane for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This was a very good idea for a show like this as Austin had to break a sweat here and had a real challenge but was never in any real danger of losing the title. For something like a fifteen minute match, that’s a great way to end a Raw. Why they don’t do this more often today is beyond me.

Rock and Mankind make the save as Vince is panicking. Austin chases Vince away to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was WAY better than the last two weeks as everything had energy to it and a lot of the show was about setting up matches at Breakdown. We’re alost to that show now and it’s starting to shape up well. After that it’s Judgment Day and then on to Survivor Series. Good show here and it’s great to be back on track after the horrible Saturday shows.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 24, 1998
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 14,727
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Man it’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these hasn’t it? I kind of gor sidetracked by some newer Raws and Superstars plus that whole Wrestlemania thing but we’re back now. This is the go home show for Summerslam so expect a final push for Undertaker vs. Austin. That show wound up being awesome so hopefully this one is too. Tonight is also the end of Brawl For All, THANK GOODNESS. Let’s get to it.

Undertaker and Kane come in through a back door. Or maybe it’s a locker room.

Theme song.

It was a locker room.

Taker and Kane come out together to open the show. JR calls Undertaker Mankind for some reason. The Cell is above the ring. Before they say anything, Vince comes out and is all smiles. It’s his birthday according to JR. Then again according to him the 7ft guy in all black will debut a sock puppet one day. Vince: “Well, Undertaker and Kane have finally come out of the casket.” Vince McMahon: True Blood writer?

Vince says he told us all so and he tells us that twice. He says that Undertaker doesn’t need him since he has Kane by his side now. However, once Undertaker becomes champion, there will be a time when he need Vince for his mind. Before the night is over, Vince wants an answer to the question “Vince McMahon: friend or foe?” Paul Bearer comes out and asks Kane if it’s true or a nightmare.

He says he’s the one that’s always been there for Kane and asks Kane to destroy Undertaker for daddy. Taker jumps Bearer and Kane walks away. Mankind comes out for the save….and gets beaten down by both brothers without fighting back at all. Kane loads up the Tombstone and Taker goes up top to make it a SPIKE TOMBSTONE. Why didn’t they bust that bad boy out more often?

Vince says now only Austin remains between Taker and the title. Cue Austin to keep this segment going. He pops up on the stage and a wall of fire comes up. Austin (now with the Smoking Skull belt. Not sure if that had been seen before) says he knew they were together all along and that he doesn’t appreciate being set on fire. He can’t beat both of them at once so tonight, he’s taking one of them out.

Ken Shamrock vs. Dan Severn

Mankind has been taken out in an ambulance. This is a result of the triple threat last week where Severn choked Shamrock out post match. They both fight for the leg control to start but Severn rolls into the ropes by mistake. He comes back with a powerbomb but doesn’t cover. After a gordbuster a powerslam gets two…and Owen runs in for the DQ. He chokes Shamrock but Blackman runs in to clear that up. This feud just kept going and going. Too short to rate but it was certainly different. Shamrock snaps and suplexes Blackman post match. Then Blackman suplexes Shamrock.

Mankind is out of the ambulance and playing with the stretcher.

Summerslam Highway video. This is still awesome.

Post break Mankind surfs down the ramp on a stretcher. He gets in the ring and says it was cahoots all along. A good cub scout should always be prepared and his good cub scout leader Mr. McMahon said that Kane wasn’t good but Mankind didn’t listen. Tonight it’s Kane vs. Mankind in the Cell. He wants to know what kind of idiot would get back into the same match that almost killed him. Somehow he’s going to throw Kane off the cage or through it, onto 7000 thumbtacks.

We get some clips of the “last” Cell match which is between Taker and Foley. Even they’re already disowning the tag team one.

Here’s Sable to announce the next match.

Marc Mero vs. Kurrgan

Sable dances with the Oddities pre match. No Jackie this week. She’d be at Summerslam for a mixed tag though. Mero asks the Oddities to leave which they do willingly. Kurrgan overpowers him down and dances a bit. Mero goes for the knee until Kurrgan picks him up and hits what we would call a Punjabi Plunge. Jackie runs through the crowd and beats down Sable as Mero hits Kurrgan low for the DQ. This was pointless.

X-Pac relieves himself in someone’s boots.

Southern Justice vs. New Age Outlaws

Someone with a deep voice pops in on commentary. He sounds like he’s doing a Terry Funk impression. Oh it’s Hawk who is bombed still. Jarrett comes out before the match with something to say but his mic doesn’t work. He gets on the headset and reveals those were his boots. Canterbury and Gunn start things off with the Outlaws taking over. Off to Roadie for the dancing punches. Jeff challenges him to a match which was already announced. Off to Knight for a suplex as the match is being ignored. With the referee distracted, Gunn piledrives Knight for the pin. The match was just a backdrop for Jarrett’s ranting.

Jarrett gets annoyed at the cameraman for shooting his boots so Southern Justice holds him for a haircut.

Mankind vs. Kane

Inside the Cell. Kane comes out first so once he’s in the Cell, Mankind tries to climb the cage. He beats up the referee that tries to stop him which lets him ram the cage door on Kane’s head. They fight outside the Cell and Foley tries to throw a chair on top of the cage twice, one of this might have hit Lawler on the way down. He tries to climb up and Taker pops up from out of nowhere to pull him off and through the table. They haven’t been inside the Cell together yet.

Now Kane comes back around to beat Mankind up some more. Kane drags him towards the door and slams it on Mankind’s body which is on the ground. Ok NOW they’re inside the cage together. Kane throws the steps into the ring and beats him in the head with it as Taker watches. He manages a dive over the top to the floor to take out Mankind before trying to throw the steps on top of him from the ring.

Mankind manages to sneak under the ring and comes out with a chair plus the bag of tacks. The chair shot to Kane’s head gets a HUGE pop which suggests the popularity Foley could have as a face. Chokeslam attempt is countered by the Claw but they slug it out instead. Piledriver to Kane sends him into the tacks without much force, but it’s not played up as a huge deal. Mankind goes up but Kane clocks him with a chair.

Chokeslam puts Foley down and there’s the tombstone but Kane won’t cover. Taker sends him a throat slit sign so Kane picks up another chair. Foley gets up and a pair of chair shots to the head puts him down. Mankind gets up AGAIN but walks into a tombstone on the chair. Austin pops out from under the ring (that’s a Russo Special) and destroys Kane, resulting in probably the only DQ in the history of the Cell.

Rating: C+. This was more about the ending of the match than the match itself. The main idea here though was to basically turn Foley face through feeling bad about the horrible beating he took. It’s not a great match or anything but it pretty much did its job. They would lose the titles on Sunday anyway so Kane and Mankind could split in peace.

Taker tries to get in to stop the beating but Vince raises the Cell to prevent Austin vs. Taker from happening before Sunday.

Post break Taker calls Austin a coward for jumping Kane. He says that seals Austin’s fate and tonight, he’ll take his revenge because it’s personal.

Here’s Chyna who wants to call out Rock because of the beating HHH got from the Nation last week. Before she says anything Rock is here. The rest of the Nation comes out as well with a ladder. I think I remember this segment happening live. Rock gets on the bottom rung of the ladder and shows Chyna a shot of DX’s locker room with a forklift in front of it. Rock talks about going to Summerslam, climbing the People’s ladder rung by rung and taking his Intercontinental Title back.

As for Chyna, he sees her looking at him with those bedroom eyes. She’s a very frustrated woman and Rock can’t blame her at all for that. The one conclusion is that Chyna needs to get some. About 2am tonight, Rock can be the man to give it to her. She lunges at him but Brown and Owen make her stop. Rock says she looks natural on her knees and leans down to kiss her but says he doesn’t kiss trash like you. Mark Henry however can do it but Shawn Michaels runs out with a chair to the head of Henry to save Chyna.

Post break DX is out of the room and looking for DX in the parking lot.

Val Venis vs. Taka Michnoku

This is technically a rematch from last week where Val ran the gauntlet but lost to Taka in the final match. Taka takes him down with a spinwheel kick but Val shrugs it off. Shawn is on commentary now but won’t tell us much his relationship with DX. Val powerbombs him and hits the Money Shot but HHH comes in with a chair shot to break it up.

HHH is MAD and says at Summerslam, Rocky belong to him. He was a bit more colorful than that but you get the idea.

We get an extended edition of the Austin vs. Taker video.

X-Pac vs. Gangrel

Gangrel jumps him to start but Pac comes back with a spinning kick. Powerslam gets two for Gangrel and a powerbomb puts Pac down. A Swan Dive misses and Edge is watching. Pac comes back and hits the Bronco Buster but here’s Jarrett with a guitar shot for the DQ.

After DX gets X-Pac out of the ring, Edge runs in and beats down Gangrel.

Undertaker has a casket.

Brawl For All Finals: Bradshaw vs. Bart Gunn

THANK GOODNESS it ends here. I couldn’t take much more of this. We get a recap of this for some reason. Bart knocks him down in about ten seconds and the knockout is complete at 42 seconds. Dang I was hoping to get some reading in during this thing. Bart gets 75 grand and Bradshaw gets 25 grand, as this becomes one of the biggest jokes in company history. Bart didn’t get pushed AT ALL after this, other than forgettable and short feuds with Steve Williams and Hardcore Holly. No title shots, no big angles, no MMA gimmick change, nothing. We wasted six weeks on NOTHING.

Vince says he’ll get his answer tonight. You can hear stage directors saying to get the casket ready.

The lights go blue and the druids start chanting as some guy in a white jacket goes up the ramp for some reason. The druids brings out a casket and Undertaker follows with his new demonic music. Taker says Kane has his own business at Summerslam but for tonight, Taker wants Austin. Here’s Vince instead who asks friend or foe. He extends his hand and is promptly chokeslammed.

Austin pops out of the casket and talks trash to Vince. Now Kane pops out of the casket and beats up Austin while Undertaker watches. Austin gets to the floor and grabs a chair but walks away instead of fighting a losing battle. See, that’s how you have a smart but still tough face. In a cool visual, flames comes up (slowly) down the middle of the ramp, making it look like the dividing line on a highway, to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a hard one to grade. They certainly did a good job of pushing Summerslam as I think every match got at least a mention other than Brown vs. Venis (which for some reason would last fifteen minutes). However the main event stuff felt like a month of stories in one night. Tonight alone we had: Vince telling Undertaker to pick, Austin attacking Kane in the Cell, Austin and Kane in the casket, Undertaker and Kane officially uniting, Paul Bearer pleading with Kane, and probably some other stuff I’m forgetting. All of that in ONE SHOW. It was a bit too much for me, but the PPV makes up for it.

Here’s Summerslam if you’re interested: