ECW On Sci Fi – June 3, 2008: Double Shot

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 3, 2008
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Mike Adamle, Tazz

We have a new #1 contender to the ECW Title as Big Show gets to revive his feud against Kane, a mere nine years after they had such a terrible feud in the first place. Normally I would say other than that, but it isn’t like there is much going on here other than Colin Delaney vs. Armando Estrada. Let’s get to it.

Here is One Night Stand if you need a recap.

Teddy Long takes over Armando Estrada’s office and is apparently the new GM.

Opening sequence.

CM Punk vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. John Morrison vs. Chavo Guerrero

The winner gets Kane (not said to be a title match) later tonight. Dreamer and Morrison pair off while Punk knees Chavo in the corner. Morrison misses the break dancing legdrop and Dreamer drops an elbow (on Tommy Morrison, according to Adamle) before Punk takes Dreamer into the corner. A clothesline puts Morrison on the floor and Adamle catches himself before getting the name wrong again (that’s a step). Chavo goes outside as well so Punk hits the big dive to take them out.

Back in and Morrison’s Flying Chuck gets two on Punk with Dreamer making the save. Dreamer gets Morrison in the Texas Cloverleaf so Chavo comes in with Three Amigos to put Dreamer down. Morrison catches Chavo on top but Punk knocks them both down, with Morrison getting tied in the Tree of Woe. Dreamer (who Adamle ALSO calls Tommy Morrison) hits a running basement dropkick but Chavo comes off the top with the frog splash. Punk is right there with the GTS to finish Chavo (of the Chavo Morrison’s I believe) and get the match with Kane.

Rating: C+. Usual fast paced action here with Punk winning to set up what could be an interesting Punk vs. Kane match. That being said, it was a five minute match and I’m not sure how Adamle can be this bad at his job. He’s been doing this for a bit now and it shouldn’t be hard to keep track of basic names. Adamle just doesn’t seem cut out for this job and that is becoming more obvious every week.

Teddy Long shows Armando Estrada a letter from the Board Of Directors, saying he is no longer ECW GM. He’s also no longer going to be so highly paid, but he can have a match tonight….against Matt Hardy.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Sydal

Kofi Kingston is on commentary. Benjamin powers Sydal around to start but Sydal is right back up with a running headscissors. A top rope Meteora gives Sydal two as commentary is rather impressed. Benjamin isn’t having that and hits a rather hard snapmare into the corner, setting up an armbar. A clothesline cuts off Sydal’s comeback and Benjamin tosses him hard to the floor. That’s not enough for Benjamin, who throws Sydal into Kofi and gets the countout.

Rating: C. If that wasn’t a tryout for Sydal, he probably got at least another look as a result. Sydal got in some offense here and looked rather smooth in doing so. Benjamin vs. Kingston continues and is probably building to what could be a nice main event. For now though, points for a bit of a unique finish, with Sydal not even getting pinned.

Post match Kofi charges in for the fight with Benjamin, who manages to send him into the steps and escape.

Matt Hardy vs. Armando Estrada

Non-title. Hardy blocks a kick and sends him down but Estrada gets in a few right hands in the corner. Not that it matters, as Hardy shrugs them off and hits the Twist Of Fate to finish in about a minute.

Post match here is Teddy Long to say not so fast because Estrada has one more chance to prove he is worth all that money in his contract.

Colin Delaney vs. Armando Estrada

Delaney Oklahoma rolls him for two at the bell, followed by an O’Connor roll for the pin in less than thirty seconds.

Post break Estrada yells at Long, who says Estrada can wrestle here, but not with a contract. He can be like Delaney used to be! Ron Simmons comes in for the catchphrase.

Video on a press conference today in Los Angeles to promote Million Dollar Mania (with HHH getting in the required Dr. Evil impression).

Kane vs. CM Punk

Non-title. Kane shoves him down to start and Punk might need a different strategy. Punk works on the arm for a change but Kane powers him down again. Back up and Punk knocks him outside, only to get dropped with a heck of a right hand. Kane chokes Punk over his back but Punk fires off some knees. Not that they make much of a difference as Kane hits a big boot to send us to a break.

Back with Kane holding an abdominal stretch before kicking him down again. Some forearms to the back set up a bodyscissors to make Punk scream a bit more. Punk fights up and manages a sunset flip for two, only to get his head take off by a clothesline. The bodyscissors goes on again but Punk fights up for the fourth or so time.

A bunch of running knees in the corner look to set up the running bulldog but Kane reverses into a belly to back for two. Punk grabs a springboard bulldog for two of his own, only to get dropped with a side slam. There’s the top rope clothesline for two more but the chokeslam is countered. Punk’s ribs are too banged up for the GTS though and Kane chokeslams him for the pin.

Rating: B-. This took time to get going but it picked up a lot once it stopped being a squash. I’m not sure why Kane needed to beat him up this badly, though Punk does have an out by wrestling three times in two days as opposed to Kane’s one. Still though, this was a bit more one sided than it needed to be, as Punk is hardly some loser who should be getting crushed.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come in to take out Kane.

A bunch of replays end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event helped a lot and Punk opening and closing the show was a good idea, but my goodness the Draft cannot come soon enough around here. They just need some fresh blood and this show proved it badly. You can only rearrange people so many different ways before you run out of ideas and they reached that point a good while ago. Punk and Kane can’t do everything forever and that is going to have to change sooner than later.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2013 (2019 Redo): It Still Works

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,739
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a double main event tonight with a pair of smaller guys vs. big powerhouses with CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title. This is remembered as one of the best shows in a very long time for WWE and it should be interesting to see how well it holds up. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Ambrose is defending and there’s no Shield with him to start. Some standing switches go nowhere and Ambrose continues to look moderately displeased by the whole thing at worst. Rob is right back up with a spinning kick to the chest, meaning he can hit those finger pokes. You don’t do that to Ambrose, who chops away in the corner and stops a charging Rob with a kick to the face.

The neck crank goes on, followed by a running dropkick against the ropes to keep Rob in trouble. It’s back to the chinlock with the microphones picking up the spot calling. Rob is right back up with a kick to the face and the split legged moonsault out of the corner for two. A kick to the head breaks up the original Dirty Deeds (headlock driver) but here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. That brings out Mark Henry and Big Show and we take a break. Back with everyone standing at ringside and Dean dropping an elbow for two. The ECW chants bring Rob back to life but Dean sends him outside.

That means a staredown between the four on the floor with Rob managing a suplex on Dean. The spinning kick to the back on the apron has Dean in even more trouble and it’s a top rope cannonball for two back inside. Dean is right back with a spinebuster for two of his own but misses his top rope elbow. Rob has to go after Rollins instead of trying the Five Star so he kicks Dean down again. The Five Star connects but Roman Reigns comes in with a spear for the DQ at 13:40.

Rating: B-. This worked rather well and is one of Van Dam’s last good matches either in WWE or anywhere for that matter. He looked like his old self here and made Ambrose look good, even when he got the DQ win. This was still before Shield had reached their peak and they were far better as a team anyway. It got the crowd going and happened to be a good match in the process. Not bad for the Kickoff.

Here’s the Miz as your host for the evening. His task at the moment: tell us about the main events we already know. How TNA of him. We’re about to hear our first match but Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off with some dancing. Miz: “Really? Really? WELCOME TO SUMMERSLAM!”

The opening video focuses on Los Angeles and how big things happen here. Like Summerslam. That’s a nice motif and it moves into the double main event, which is indeed sounding great. Future note: the music during this video would become Akira Tozawa’s theme (not sure if that’s a Network edit or not).

Dig that pyro. Seriously with all the money they have, we can only get it at Wrestlemania and the Saudi shows?

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem. This was a plot point on Total Divas because that she needed to stretch for plot points.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match with pins and submissions only. It’s also Bray’s in-ring debut, which is almost weird to imagine. Harper and Rowan are in Wyatt’s corner, as tends to be the case. The bell rings and the flames come up, going all of six inches high. Kane slugs away to start and the flames do go higher as someone lands on the mat.

Harper and Rowan get closer to the ring and the flames go WAY up to make things look a lot better. Kane hits a suplex to pop the flames again and avoids a big boot, sending Bray close to the fire. Bray’s running splash in the corner connects and he hammers away as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled so far. Back up and Kane sends him into the corner and the side slam makes the flames go up again. The chokeslam is broken up and Harper tries to throw in a kendo stick but the flames cut it off.

Cue the fireman to put the stick out, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam. Rowan grabs the fire extinguisher to try and put out the flames but they come right back up as Kane hits another chokeslam. For some reason there’s no cover so Kane hits a third chokeslam, meaning it’s Tombstone time. Hold on again though as Harper and Rowan put a blanket over the flames and get in for the beatdown. The fans want Undertaker but settle for Sister Abigail to finish Kane at 7:49.

Rating: F. Well that was dumb. You have Wyatt getting destroyed until the goons saved him, the flames not lasting seven minutes before someone figured a way around them, and the match being dreadful until the ending. Pick two of them and you can figure out what was wrong with this one. It was a good idea on paper but the execution was a nightmare, which sums up Wyatt’s whole career.

Post match Wyatt puts on his hat and sits in the rocking chair as Harper and Rowan put Kane’s head on the steps. They pick up the other steps and crush his head for the big knockout, which looked better than most of the match. Harper and Rowan carry Kane out.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about the Wyatt Family.

On the Kickoff Show, Paul Heyman talked about how the real story of David vs. Goliath is that Goliath took the best shot and then destroyed David. Heyman has gotten both sides to agree that tonight can be No DQ so Lesnar can finish Punk for good.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow is Mr. Money in the Bank and cost Cody the briefcase to break up their team. Before the match, Sandow talks about how there have been great pairings throughout literary history, with each pair having a lackey. Tonight, Sandow proves that he was the leader by sending Cody back to the land of clowns. Cody starts fast and hammers away before getting two off a backdrop. Sandow is right back with a suplex and a double arm crank as this is already feeling like a TV match.

An early Cross Rhodes attempt is blocked and Sandow hits the Russian legsweep into the wind-up elbow for two. Something like Edge’s Edgecation goes on but Cody kicks away without much effort. Cody catches him on top with a MuscleBuster of all things and that gets the fans into things for a change. A missile dropkick gives Cody two more and the Disaster Kick knocks Sandow silly for another two. Cody misses a charge into the post to give Sandow two but Cody snaps off Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: D. This was a case where Cody should have won the briefcase and moved up to the World Title scene but instead they went with Sandow and the whole thing flopped because no one bought him in that spot. Maybe they were planning on having Cody take the briefcase from him, but the damage was already done. It’s a case of putting too much thought into things as WWE screwed up something else.

We recap Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio for the Smackdown World Title. Alberto had put Christian on the shelf late last year and now Christian is the challenger of the month. Actually saying this is recapping Christian vs. Alberto is a little misleading as Alberto is neither seen nor mentioned in the video. I know he’s not interesting but come on now.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending. They circle each other a few times until a loud kick to the leg has Christian in trouble. A headlock doesn’t do much for the champ as Christian comes back up with a right hand and a toss over the ropes. Back in and Christian gets caught on top for the running enziguri into the running kicks to the chest. It’s time to go to the arm, as tends to be Del Rio’s style.

The armbar doesn’t last long so Del Rio throws him into the air for the big crash to the mat. A top rope double stomp to the arm gets two but Del Rio misses a charge and goes crashing out to the floor. That lets Christian hit a dive off the top and they’re both down. Back in and Del Rio goes right back to the arm, because it’s a plan that works well. He deviates from said plan by going up and diving into raised boots though, allowing Christian to hammer away in the corner.

The high crossbody gets two on the champ but the Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber. Another running enziguri in the corner rocks Christian for two more but he’s fine enough to hit a middle rope elbow to the jaw. A super hurricanrana gives Christian another two and it’s time for the spear.

Since the idea of selling Christian’s spear makes anyone cringe, Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for two instead. There’s a low superkick for another two, with the fans dubbing this awesome. Eh…..it’s close but I don’t know about that. Christian hits the spear out of nowhere but the arm is banged up, allowing Del Rio to slap on the armbreaker for the tap at 12:29.

Rating: B. I can’t go all the way to awesome but this was a rather fun match with Christian throwing everything he had. That being said, I wasn’t buying a lot of the near falls as Christian never hit the Killswitch and Del Rio never won with anything but the armbreaker. Christian’s career was more or less done at this point, as he would be put out of action again in a few months and have his last comeback with his final match in March.

Post match Del Rio says he’ll be the hero Los Angeles needs. Someone get this man a big bus!

Video on Summerslam Axxess earlier in the day, complete with a women’s tag match including Marina Menunos.

Maria is here and talks about the Bella Twins freaking out about Maria saying Natalya did well on Total Divas. Cue Fandango and Summer Rae to dance but Maria and Miz do just the same, leaving Fandango and Summer looking annoyed.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

Cameron, Naomi, Eva Marie and Nikki Bella are here because this is the Total Divas match of the night. It’s weird seeing Natalya in regular gear instead of the leather she’s worn for years now. You can tell this is serious as they exchanged SLAPS on Raw. They fight over failed hiptoss attempts to start and it’s time for another slapoff. Brie has to bail to the floor to avoid the Sharpshooter so Nikki and Eva get in some cheating to take Natalya to the floor. The fans chant for JBL instead of this mess before quickly shifting over to the other announcers. Or maybe it’s an old Jerry Graham fan club.

Brie grabs the chinlock as the fans want tables. Egads the idea of the Total Divas crew trying to do something that complicated. The chinlock goes on again because that’s their best idea at the moment. Natalya fights out without much trouble but the Sharpshooter is countered with a rollup into the corner. The other four get in a fight on the floor and it’s a THIRD CHINLOCK in less than five minutes. Natalya breaks it up and, with the fans saying they want Ryder, slaps on the Sharpshooter for the win at 5:21.

Rating: D-. Any match that involves three chinlocks in less than five minutes is pretty self explanatory. There was no story here other than they were arguing about a reality show and that’s enough to get us here. The wrestling was pretty awful with the talented Natalya not being good enough to carry Brie. At least it was short, but this really had no business being on Summerslam.

Ryback, currently a bully, yells at catering about the soup being cold. It’s supposed to be, which Ryback knew of course. The soup goes down the chef’s shirt and then over his head. Ryback: “Feed me moron.” Make sure you catch his podcast so he can tell you how he came up with that entire idea and how it would have been a classic if WWE supported him.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar. Punk was about to win Money in the Bank but Paul Heyman turned on him because Punk was nothing without him. Heyman brought Lesnar back in to destroy Punk, who had been Heyman’s friend and client for a long time. It’s a pretty easy tagline: The Best vs. The Beast. This was better than the UFC version: Former UFC Heavyweight Champion vs. The Miserable Failure.

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot, but a fired up Lesnar is a terrifying human being. Punk shrugs off the shoulders in the corner to start so Lesnar just does them again. The CM PUNK chants begin and you can feel the energy in this one. A heck of a beal across the ring rocks Punk and it’s time for some choking in the corner. Punk manages a kick to the head and Lesnar is rocked, followed by some running knees to put him outside.

The suicide dive connects as I can’t help but look for the baseball sized growth on his back (it’s just hard not to). Punk tries the steps but Brock knocks them right back into him without much effort. Lesnar posts himself though and Punk scores with a top rope dive to stagger him again. The clothesline off the announcers’ table connects as well but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman. Lesnar LAUNCHES him over the table and Cole is declaring this one over already.

Back in and Punk starts kicking at the leg so Lesnar hits him in the face (don’t make it complicated). The bearhug stays on the ribs as you can’t fault Lesnar’s plan. Punk’s escape plan: hit Lesnar in the face. See? He’s learning too. Lesnar goes right back to the ribs and the slow pace continues. Another bearhug goes on and gets broken up by more shots to the face. Punk kicks him in the ribs and goes up, only to dive into a World’s Strongest Slam (giving us a great OH DANG IT face).

Some backbreakers get two as Punk’s ribs are being destroyed and we hit the chinlock. Punk bites the ear to escape and starts striking away, setting up a top rope knee to the face to FINALLY put Lesnar down. Some running knees in the corner connect and a kick to the head sets up the Macho Elbow (almost a splash) for a hot two. The GTS and F5 are both countered so Punk kicks him in the head again.

Another GTS attempt is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a triangle choke. You just don’t do that to a power guy like Lesnar though, as he turns it over into a powerbomb….which doesn’t break anything. Lesnar powers up again though, this time into a heck of a running powerbomb for the real break. The delayed cover gets two and a ticked off Lesnar rolls some suplexes for two more.

Lesnar takes his sweet time going outside so Punk can get up top for a dive. That’s blocked by a raised chair, but Punk still drives it into Lesnar at the same time. That means Punk can beat the heck out of Lesnar with the chair and it’s Punk getting fired up this time. Back in and Punk hits him low, meaning it’s time to go up top for the Macho Elbow with the chair. Lesnar can’t get up (that’s a rare shot) so Punk hits him again, leaving Heyman to take the chair.

Brock is back up and grabs the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman’s tie for the block. Punk slips out and hits the GTS with Heyman having to make a save. The chase is on and Punk runs into the F5, which is countered into a DDT for two. The Anaconda Vice goes on, but since Lesnar’s legs aren’t kicking you know it’s not a finish. Heyman tries to come in with a chair….but Punk steps onto it. A right hand drops Heyman and Punk puts him in the Vice (like an idiot). Lesnar gets in the chair shot to Punk and the F5 onto the chair is good for the pin at 25:17.

Rating: A. Oh I loved this one all over again. The one part holding it back was Heyman getting involved once too often and Punk getting stupid by putting him in the Vice (he’s way too smart to get that caught up no matter what). Other than that, this was an incredible display of the underdog (who happens to be a multiple time World Champion) going after the unbeatable monster and getting dangerously close to stopping him. I was getting into the near falls here and that says a lot given that I knew how it was ending. Awesome stuff and the blueprint for how to have a smaller guy fight Lesnar.

Punk gets the big hero’s sendoff in what would be his last great match.

A fan took a Mark Henry splash for Summerslam tickets. I’d do it too. The fan and his friends will be ringside for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Langston and Lee turned on Ziggler so he got Kaitlyn, who lost the Divas Title to AJ, on his side for this. It’s so strange seeing Big E. as his old self. The guys start and Big E. goes straight to an abdominal stretch to take over. It’s already off to the women with AJ kicking Kaitlyn in the face for two. The sleeper on Kaitlyn’s back keeps things slow and we look at the fans eating Doritos (sponsor).

Kaitlyn fights up and brings Ziggler back in for the dropkick and rapid fire elbow drops to Big E. Since they’re just elbows, Big E. is right back up with an over the shoulder backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making the save. A hard running shoulder in the corner only hits post, leaving Kaitlyn to hit a heck of a spear to AJ on the floor (AJ always sold that perfectly). Big E. is fine enough to try the Big Ending but Ziggler reverses into the Zig Zag for the pin at 6:45.

Rating: D+. This was nothing but a way to let the crowd calm down a bit after the instant classic and there’s nothing wrong with being in that spot. Kaitlyn’s spear looked awesome and it was always cool to see Big E. throwing humans around like they were toys. The Ziggler push was already dying around this time but somehow he would still be kicking around in big spots six years later. WWE is funny/stupid in that way.

Fandango interrupts Miz one more time so Miz lays him out. Cole: “It’s Fan-DOWN-Go.” No Cole, it isn’t.

The Kickoff Panel does what Kickoff Panels do. In this case that means picking Daniel Bryan to beat John Cena for the title.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. Cena was given the chance to pick his challenger for this show and selected Bryan, who had worked his way up the card like few others in recent years. Management hated the idea because Bryan wasn’t good enough and tried to give Bryan a corporate makeover. Bryan refused to cut his beard though because he was going to be himself. HHH, who has seemed to favor Bryan, is guest referee. Bryan and Cena have played up the sports entertainment vs. wrestling deal, which is exactly what this match should be about.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging with HHH as guest referee. Cena is also sporting a massive growth on his elbow, which was leaving him desperately in need of surgery because it’s the size of a baseball. Bryan isn’t getting the superstar pops yet but he’s cheered more than Cena. We get the Big Match Intros and I had forgotten about Bryan’s THE BEARD IS HERE shirt. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a ton of time here.

Bryan rolls out with no trouble and it’s an early standoff. Back up and Cena tries a test of strength, which is blocked by a bridge. The YES Lock attempt sends Cena bailing to the floor and he tells the doctor that his arm is fine. Back in and Bryan takes him down into the surfboard knee stomp as Cena is in way over his head with the wrestling. Therefore, he runs Bryan over for a knock to the floor because power is his best bet. Cena follows him outside but gets sent into the steps, only to manage a suplex off the steps to put Bryan down again.

Back in and Cena whips him hard into the corner as Bryan has no answer for the power game just yet. A Batista Bomb gives Cena two and the chinlock goes on. Bryan fights up and forearms away, setting up some kicks in the corner to put Cena on defense again. The running clothesline drops Cena and you can feel the fans’ energy picking up. The YES Kicks connect but, as usual, the big one misses and Cena fires off the shoulders.

Cena takes too long with the Shuffle though and gets kicked in the head, only to come back with the ProtoBomb. Now the Shuffle connects but the AA doesn’t work just yet. Instead Bryan hits a missile dropkick for two as they’re going back and forth very well here. Over ten minutes in, Bryan finally goes after the BIG FREAKING BULGE on his arm to take over. Cena tries the STF but Bryan kicks away and grabs one of his own. The rope is grabbed so Bryan hits a pair of German suplexes for a pair of twos.

Now it’s off to the YES Lock but Cena slips out, earning himself a guillotine choke instead. That’s countered with a backdrop into the corner (cool) and they’re both down for a second. Cena grabs the AA out of nowhere for two and they’re down a bit longer. With nothing working, Cena goes up but Bryan catches him with the running forearms to stagger him. Bryan superplexes him down but hangs on to stay up top for a cool visual.

The Swan Dive connects for two so Cena runs him over with the clothesline for two of his own. Cole mentions that HHH is referee, marking the most significant HHH portion of the match over twenty minutes in. Cena’s super AA is blocked by elbows to the head but Cena blocks the super hurricanrana. That means jumping down and dropping Bryan on top of his head in a botch I had forgotten about so the cringing is strong. The STF goes on with Bryan rolling over to take off some of the pressure.

Bryan manages to reverse into the YES Lock until Cena makes the rope. The running corner dropkicks have Cena in more trouble so he comes out of the corner with the hard clothesline to turn Bryan inside out. The slugout it on until they both hit flying shoulders for another double knockdown. Bryan wins the next slugout but the moonsault out of the corner is caught on Cena’s shoulders. That’s countered into a DDT and they’re both down again. Bryan tries a high crossbody but gets caught in the AA. It’s reversed again and Bryan kicks him in the head, setting up the debuting running knee for the pin and the title at 26:54.

Rating: A+. I go back and forth on which of the two big matches I like more and this time around I liked the story that much more. Bryan debuting the running knee to win is still one of my favorite things in a long time as it came out of nowhere and makes the move look devastating right off the bat. They had a great battle of styles here with both guys sticking with their respective specialties until Bryan broke down the machine through heart and determination, plus some awesome strikes. I had a great time with this one and it was one of the best matches I’ve seen in a good while.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending as well as out so Orton wins the title in eight seconds. There’s your major story over the next eight months and yes I still believe that Bryan winning the title at Wrestlemania was the plan all along (details to be determined).

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the good is excellent and the rest just exists. That being said, with the two awesome main events and a rather good Del Rio vs. Christian match, you have a seven match card (leaving out the cash-in match) with three of them receiving some rather high praise. That’s about as good as you can get and it’s one of the better shows in recent memory. Yeah the other four matches range from bad to rather bad, but their times combined are about equal to the main event. Excellent show and worth your time (as in less than three hours) to see.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-
2014 Redo: B-
2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

2019 Redo: F

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

2019 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Was I in a really bad mood when I watched the Kickoff Show in 2017? And I’m all over the place with Cody vs. Sandow. Other than that, it’s pretty much the definitive set of ratings here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2012 (2013 Redo): Yeah Brock’s Back

Summerslam 2012
Date: August 19, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,205
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Pre-Show: US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

th anniversary. The video is interrupted by talk of a storm called Brock Lesnar, which to be fair is the main draw of the show.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho gets a quick cradle for two but Ziggler takes him right back down with a clothesline. Dolph misses a Stinger Splash and Chris goes after him, only to be easily taken down by another shot to the ribs. Not that it matters as he pops up top for the ax handle but Ziggler kicks him in the ribs again. The Fameasser gets two but an enziguri puts Dolph down for two as well. Back and forth match so far here.

Dolph jumps over Chris in the corner and puts on the sleeper which looks horrid here. Jericho rams him into the corner to escape and rains down some right hands before snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. The ribs are damaged even more though, delaying the count by several seconds. A jumping DDT gets two on the Canadian and Ziggler is getting frustrated.

Vickie freaks out over the loss.

Heyman and Brock say Lesnar wins tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Another big boot gets two but Bryan comes back with the kicks to the legs, only to be thrown over the top and out to the floor. Bryan slides back in and hits the FLYING GOAT to put Kane down. The missile dropkick drops Kane again and there are more kicks, only to have Kane clothesline his way out of trouble. The side slam gets two and the top rope clothesline looks to set up the chokeslam but Bryan bails to the floor.

Bryan slaps him in the face like a knucklehead, sending Kane through the roof. Bryan is tossed into the corner and stomped down by a furious Kane. The referee drags him away, allowing Bryan to try the NO Lock. Kane powers out so Bryan kicks him in the head. Why overcomplicate things? The flying headbutt is caught in the chokeslam but Kane wants the tombstone, allowing Bryan to counter into a small package for the pin.

Kane is going nuts in the back. Josh Matthews comes up to him like the schnook he is and is LAUNCHED off camera in a funny bit.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

Tag Titles: Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Raw. The Players are a decent team but Titus is clearly the star with Young just being there. Kofi and Truth are just transitional champions before HELL NO would take the championships a few weeks later. Nothing to see here other than a filler before we get to the main events.

Video on Summerslam Axxess.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Punk won the title at Survivor Series but got angry over Rock vs. Cena being announced as the main event of Wrestlemania 29 a year in advance. Cena cashed in the MITB case at Raw 1000 but Big Show cost Cena the match. AJ made it a three way for the sake of tormenting Punk (now a heel demanding respect) for turning down her proposal.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

The Final Cut puts Punk down but Cena breaks up the WMD, earning himself a spear from the giant for two. Show loads up a double Vader Bomb but only hits Cena, allowing Punk to springboard onto Show for the save. Everyone heads to the floor with Big Show chokeslamming Punk against the ropes, sending him back to the floor. Show drops Cena with a side slam but stares at the crowd instead of covering. Maybe someone was holding up a Twinkie?

We get a Koji Clutch/STF combo and Show taps, but we have no clear winner. This brings out AJ (Punk: “DO THE RIGHT THING LIKE SPIKE LEE! LET THE PEOPLE DECIDE! THEY CAN TWEET ABOUT IT!”) who eventually says restart the match, allowing Show to hit a double chokeslam for two on each guy. Cena ducks the WMD and hits the AA, but Punk throws him to the floor and steals the pin to retain.

Various B level celebrities are here. Maria Menunos in a Bob Backlund shirt works very well.

We recap the pre-show match to fill in time.

Kevin Rudolf sings the theme song.

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Every time I watch a Brock Lesnar match I remember how scary of a human being he is. We get spotlights for the big match intros in a cool idea. Remember that HHH told the referee to allow a lot of fighting tonight. Lesnar powers HHH into the corner to start and goes for a standing kimura (arm lock that he used to break the arm) with a jumping body scissors. HHH though is a MAN and powers out of it before clotheslining Brock to the floor. Back in and Brock pounds away, only to be clotheslined to the floor again. You know, because Cena can be in a war with Brock at Extreme Rules but HHH can easily stop him.

A release German suplex puts HHH down again but he comes back with a neck snap across the ropes. Brock is taken down by a DDT but he goes right back to the kimura and another hammerlock slam. They head to the floor with the arm going into the steps and the rest of HHH going into the announce table. Brock jumps off the table onto the Game before taking him back inside. Of all things, Lesnar busts out a small package for a one count. A hard clothesline puts HHH down but he blocks a suplex into one of his own to get a breather.

Brock misses a charge into the corner but blocks a Pedigree and throws HHH out to the floor. HHH sends him into the announce table stomach first, which is a weak spot due to some real life past illnesses which ended his UFC career for all intents and purposes. More shots to the stomach have Brock in trouble and a knee to the ribs puts him down. Heyman is losing his mind and Brock is in trouble.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Original: C

Redo: C-

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

Original: D

Redo: D+

R-Truth/Kofi Kingston vs. Prime Time Players

Original: C

Redo: D+

John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: C

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/08/19/summerslam-2012-lesnar-is-a-wrestler-again-just-like-everyone-else/

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2009 (2013 Redo): Someone Has To Go

Summerslam 2009
Date: August 23, 2009
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,129
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

The opening video is set up like a movie theater, but DX takes it over by making shadow puppets on the screen. Shawn wins by putting up Abraham Lincoln. They finally break the projector but Shawn says he can fix it. He turns it into a DX highlight video but breaks the camera one more time.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rey is defending after a long but awesome feud with Jericho. Ziggler pounds him down into the corner before getting two off a powerslam. Dolph throws him over his shoulders to the top but Rey bounces off with a moonsault press for two. Out to the floor and a cameraman is taken out via I think a hurricanrana. Back in and Ziggler catches (kind of) a rana off the top in a buckle bomb for two to take over.

Rating: B+. Excellent opener here with Ziggler being able to go move for move with one of the best high fliers of all time. It was clear that Dolph was going to be a big deal and this was a great example of why. Rey was on fire at this point but he would be derailed by a Wellness violation a few weeks later, forcing him to drop the title to John Morrison.

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

MVP jumps over Swagger in the corner and hits a quick clothesline for two to start. Swagger rolls to the floor to avoid the Ballin Elbow, only to be caught by a suicide dive. Back in and Swagger gets in some shots to the ribs to take over followed by a forearm to the back. MVP counters another shot with an elbow to the face, only to get caught in an abdominal stretch.

Luke Perry is here.

Video on celebrities guest hosting Raw. Did we really have to relive this stupid idea?

Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Kane vs. Great Khali

Slash, Robert Patrick and Maria Menunos are here.

Legacy vs. D-Generation X

DX comes in on a tank, trailing behind a bunch of soldiers on an Army jeep. Ok points for an AWESOME entrance. HHH starts with DiBiase as Ted fires off right hands in the corner. They have even less effect than you would expect so HHH suplexes him down and drops a knee for two. Off to Cody who walks into the high knee to the face from the Game and slaps Shawn as a result. Shawn gets the tag to a big pop but gets slapped again after running the ropes a bit.

ECW Title: Christian vs. William Regal

Christian is defending. Remember Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry going 32 seconds last week? This is a quarter of that as Christian grabs the Killswitch as Regal is taking his robe off for the pin to retain.

Video on the Summerslam festivities in Los Angeles.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. Orton has dominated the year and Cena is the latest guy to try to take the title. Not much here but do these two really need a backstory?

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending. Cena takes him down with a front facelock but Orton counters into a hammerlock. Randy takes him into the corner and kicks at the ribs a bit, cuing a Cena comeback with rights and lefts. Orton comes back with an elbow to the face and his VERY slow stomping. This is the main criticism of Orton around this time: he wrestled in slow motion and it makes for very dull matches. The big knee drop to the chest gets two.

Cena gets in another shot and pops up top for the Fameasser, good for two. Orton grabs the ropes to block the FU and a double clothesline puts them both down. They slug it out with Cena taking over and speeding things up, but Orton shoves the referee for the LAME DQ. To be fair though it was the first fast paced thing he did all match.

Smackdown World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. CM Punk

Back up and Hardy loads up Poetry in Motion but Punk drops him onto the open chair to take over. A series of ladder shots to the back have Hardy in big trouble. Punk sends him to the floor and hits a suicide dive but misses a chair shot. Hardy sends him into the post and gets in a chair shot to the elbow to take over. This is a slower paced match so far which is usually the best way to go about TLC matches. Now Poetry In Motion hits against the barricade and Punk is in trouble.

Hardy loads up a table next to the ring and this Punk in the head with part of the announce table and a monitor. A chair shot puts Punk down again as Hardy is in full control. Jeff sets up the big ladder and hits an INSANE Swanton Bomb through Punk through the announce table. That looked NUTS but the crash was great. Both guys are checked on as the stretcher is brought out. Hardy is taken out but Punk is crawling towards the ladder. Jeff gets off the stretcher and goes after Punk, only to be kicked off the ladder in another big crash, giving Punk the title.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

Original: C

Redo: D

Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Great Khali

Original: D+

Redo: D-

D-Generation X vs. Legacy

Original: A

Redo: B+

William Regal vs. Christian

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

The Cena vs. Orton match carries or sinks this show depending on how you look at it.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/12/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2009-punk-in-another-main-event-3/

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ECW On Sci Fi – May 27, 2008: The Short Term Fix

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 27, 2008
Location: World Arena, Colorado Springs, Colorado
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Adamle

It’s the go home ECW for One Night Stand and we have quite the addition in the form of Big Show. Last week Show returned and decided he was getting back in the ECW Title picture, which is at least more interesting than some of the other recent challengers. I’m not sure how well it is going to go but I’ll take it over the other options. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Big Show vs. Tommy Dreamer

Show tosses him around to start and gets in a shot to the ribs to put Dreamer down. There’s an elbow to drop Dreamer again and Show sits on him for a bonus. Dreamer tries to go up but get knocked out of the air, setting up the chokeslam (or body slam according to Adamle) for the win.

We look at Big Show winning the ECW Title from Rob Van Dam in 2006.

Kofi Kingston vs. Mike Knox

Shelton Benjamin is on commentary. Kofi’s kick to the chest is shoved away as Benjamin calls him “the monkey man from Bloodsport.” Knox chokes on the ropes for a bit and a butterfly suplex sets up the chinlock. That’s broken up and Kofi hits a quick dropkick into a high crossbody. Knox’s eye is cut and the spinning kick to the face, officially dubbed Trouble In Paradise, finishes him off.

Rating: C. They kept this one moving due to the lack of time but it was good to see Kofi get some momentum back after last week’s loss. You can tell WWE sees something in him and it is smart to push someone new around here, especially when they are rather unique like Kofi. Getting a big win over Benjamin could do him some good and odds are that is where this whole thing is going.

Post match the villains beat Kofi down so Benjamin can leave with a smirk.

We look at CM Punk beating John Morrison for the ECW Title last September.

We look at Chavo Guerrero winning the ECW Title from CM Punk in January.

Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk

Bam Neely is here with Chavo. An early GTS attempt has Chavo panicking so Punk kicks him in the leg. Chavo manages a quick hot shot for a breather and we hit the chinlock with a bodyscissors. We take a break and come back with Chavo being backdropped to the floor for quite the crash. Neely low bridges Punk down though and Chavo starts in on the back. The half crab stays on said back but Punk makes the rope. The GTS is countered into a hurricanrana though and Chavo grabs a rollup with the trunks for the pin.

Rating: C+. The match was good enough but my goodness it’s hard to get overly invested in Chavo doing much of anything. He just isn’t that interesting and there isn’t much of a way around it. Granted it doesn’t help that his two big feuds of the year, against Punk and Kane, have been done so much to death that it’s hard to care about them at all.

Tommy Dreamer won the ECW Title in April 2000.

Raw Rebound.

Colin Delaney is worried about a whole new set of opponents around here in the Draft. He could go for getting rid of Armando Estrada though.

John Morrison won the ECW Title in June 2007.

Kane vs. Miz/John Morrison

Non-title. Miz and Morrison jump him to start and choking on the ropes slows the giant down. Ranted it slows him down for all of a few seconds as the comeback is on, with Kane grabbing Miz by the throat. Morrison comes in and the double teaming is enough for the DQ.

Post match everyone else in Sunday’s #1 contenders match runs in for the big brawl. Kane and Big Show have a staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The best thing I can say about this show is that it had a focus. It was building towards one match and almost nothing more, but that’s all it needs to be. The Draft could do ECW A LOT of good at this point, but at least they have have something to bridge some of the gaps on the way there.

 

 

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Summerslam 2007 (2022 Redo): Return For Two

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

This is a bit of a weird show as it is built around the two World Title matches, but two of the other big matches involve people who have been gone for months. We’ll be seeing Randy Orton challenging John Cena for the Raw World Title while Great Khali defends the Smackdown World Title against Batista. At the same time, Rey Mysterio and HHH are back after some long layoffs, making the build for this a bit weird. Let’s get to it.

The opening video narrates a look at Mysterio returning and the regular World Title matches, making it feel like a TV show.

Then we get the REAL opening, with the “We Can Rebuild Him” video on the returning HHH, the actual star of the show.

Kane vs. Finlay

Grudge match after Finlay accidentally knocked a cup of coffee Kane. Worked for Jericho in 2000. Kane, with his injured ribs, knocks Finlay into the corner to start and grabs a slam to keep him in early trouble. Some uppercuts in the corner set up some choking on the ropes before Kane knocks him over the top. That’s not enough for Kane, who boots him in the face, only to get hit in the ribs.

Back in and a backsplash gives Finlay two and it’s off to a half crab. Kane fights up again and it’s an enziguri to put Finlay down for a change. A one armed side slam gives Kane two and there’s the top rope clothesline to rock Finlay again. Finlay is right back with a shot to the ring but it’s Hornswoggle time.

You don’t do that to Kane, who shoves Hornswoggle down but can’t chokeslam Finlay due to the bad ribs. JBL: “He has won a WWE Championship with that chokeslam.” No, he hasn’t. Finlay unhooks the turnbuckle pad, which is enough for him to sneak in the Shillelagh (with an assist from Hornswoggle) shot to the ribs for two. That’s too much for Kane, who sends him into the post and grabs the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was about taking two hard hitting guys and letting them beat on each other for a little while. That’s how you start a show and it worked well enough, as they both know how to do this match really well. Not a classic opener or anything close, but it was fun to watch two guys like this do their thing.

Vince McMahon and Coach joins the General Managers in a party themed move. McMahon thinks the mother of his illegitimate son wants a payday but here is Santino Marella to suggest he is said son. That’s rejected, so here is MVP to say he wants to issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy for something other than a match. Vince is down for that, but William Regal thinks Vince’s son would be more, uh, regal. Everyone else leaves and Vince seems disturbed by the thought of being with an Englishwoman.

Video on Rey Mysterio. Did you know he’s back tonight?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

Umaga is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. They stare at each other to start and Umaga punches both of them in the face before sending them into various corners. Carlito and Kennedy need a breather on the floor and decide to go for a distraction, which goes horribly wrong as well. Kennedy saves Carlito from the running hip attack in the corner though and it’s a running boot to drive Umaga’s head into the steps. That leaves Kennedy to stomp on Carlito inside but he’s right back with a springboard elbow.

They seem to be going as fast as they can because Umaga is up, meaning it’s an uppercut from the floor to drop Carlito. Kennedy saves him from a Stinger Splash in the corner though and a shot to Umaga’s head gets two. Umaga isn’t about to get double suplexed so he suplexes both of them at the same time instead. The monster awakens and wrecks both of them, including the running hip attack in the corner to Carlito. Kennedy knocks Umaga outside…but Umaga is right back in with the Samoan Spike to finish Kennedy to retain.

Rating: C. It was little more than a Raw match and that didn’t exactly leave us with a great showcase. The good thing is that Umaga looked like a monster out there as Kennedy and Carlito combined completely failed to stop him. That’s the kind of win that will build Umaga back up even more and that is going to make the person who finally stops him look even bigger, as it should.

Undertaker is back at Unforgiven.

We recap Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Chavo put Rey on the shelf for knee surgery and is now laughing at the idea that Rey is coming back. Revenge seems imminent.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Rey’s torso is covered in silver paint because he can be a bit odd with some of his costume ideas. They talk trash to each other to start until Rey hits him in the face. Chavo goes after the knee but Rey slips away without much effort. The test of strength is on, allowing them to flip around a lot with neither getting very far.

Another try for the knee works better for Chavo as the leg is wrapped around the middle rope. Rey isn’t having that and kicks Chavo outside before taking him back in for some knee work of his own. There’s a middle rope hurricanrana to send Chavo flying again but he catches Rey in the Tree of Woe to go after the knee again. Said knee is wrapped around the post as we get to the meat of things. The stretch muffler has Rey in more trouble and there’s a dropkick to the knee.

The knee is fine enough to hit an enziguri but it gives out on the 619 attempt. Rey has to get to the ropes to get out of a half crab and now it’s Chavo’s turn to be in the Tree of Woe. That doesn’t last long either so Rey sends him outside for a running seated senton off the apron. Rey misses a high crossbody back inside though and it’s a Gory Bomb to give Chavo two. Another 619 attempt misses and Chavo hits a few Amigos. Rey isn’t having that though and it’s the 619 into the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: B-. As expected, this was a good match between two talented wrestlers, though I’m still not sure how much interest there was going to be in Chavo as a focal point. He’s a very good worker, but he is more a solid hand than a featured player. That being said, this was all about Rey being back and getting to shake the rust off, which worked well in his first match in a long time.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell say Rey Mysterio’s return may have been great, but HHH’s return will be an entrance, followed by him bowing down to King Booker.

Battle Royal

Maria, Beth Phoenix, Melina, Jillian Hall, Mickie James, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Kristal, Michelle McCool, Layla, Kelly Kelly, Brooke

The winner gets a future Women’s Title shot against Candice Michelle, who is at ringside. It’s a brawl to start, as it should be, with a bunch of brawling around the ring. Jillian gets rid of Maria and Layla is gone soon after. Brooke seems to have been tossed somewhere in there too and Kristal gets rid of Victoria (that’s an upset).

Michelle knocks Kristal out and there goes Kelly (through the ropes, because over the top is a bit too much). Torrie helps get rid of Jillian and Melina knocks out Mickie. We’re down to Michelle, Melina, Beth and Torrie, with Melina being knocked out by Michelle. Beth gets rid of Torrie without much effort and we’re down to two. Michelle tries a kick and is tossed out to give Beth the win.

Rating: D. What else did you expect here? There are only a few women who are ready to challenge for the title and Beth is about as good of a choice as you could have here. Beth is a different kind of monster and we should be in for a showdown with Candice. At least they kept this moving, as that is the best idea they could have had here.

Almost immediately as soon as the match is over, here is MVP, with a few guys carrying a cooler, to say no one paid to see these women. You need him on the show, so MVP talks about how he used to drink beer. His tastes have changed now that he is rich, but tonight it’s time for a beer drinking contest with Matt Hardy.

Hold on though, as Matt brings up MVP using a surrogate for their boxing match. Well Matt (who somehow knew this would be a drinking contest) has his own surrogate: Steve Austin. Cue Austin, who warms up for the contest with some rope running and pushups but it’s a Stunner before the first beer is consumed. A lot of drinking ensues. Nothing wrong with a surprise appearance like this, even if Austin didn’t say a word.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

Vince McMahon is still in the office with the bosses when Cryme Tyme interrupts. They think “Vinnie Mac” (Vince: “Vinnie Mac?”) might be their dad and it’s time to chant MONEY MONEY YEAH YEAH. Everyone dances around Vince, including William Regal in a hat. Cue Ron Simmons for the catchphrase.

Video on John Morrison.

ECW World Title: John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Morrison is defending and gets taken down without much trouble to start. Punk wins a grapple off to start and hits a hiptoss before hitting a triangle dropkick to the floor. Back up and Morrison hits a neckbreaker onto the apron, allowing him to hammer away with some right hands.

We hit the chinlock with an arm trap, which Tazz doesn’t seem to notice as a version of the Tazmission. A regular chinlock doesn’t work either and Punk is back up with a middle rope crossbody for two of his own. The scoop powerslam gets two more but it’s a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to give Morrison two more. Back up and Punk crotches Morrison on the top and they’re both down for a bit. Punk’s top rope hurricanrana is countered though and Morrison puts his feet on the ropes for the stolen pin to retain.

Rating: C. These two have had more than a few matches now and it wasn’t exactly anything better than their previous stuff. Punk has lost to Morrison time after time now and there isn’t much left for these two to do with each other. The other problem is that there isn’t anything else for Punk on ECW, but he has to win something soon. Not a bad match, but it could have been on ECW TV.

King Booker vs. HHH

This is HHH’s first match since January after another torn quadricep. Booker, with Queen Sharmell, thinks there is only one king around here. Naturally HHH gets a big special entrance video, including the WE CAN REBUILD HIM deal. Commentary tries to put it over like the 2002 MSG return and it’s just not there.

Booker slugs away to start but gets punched outside without much trouble. Back in and HHH gets cut off with an elbow to the head, only to get knocked right back to the floor. HHH gets to punch him in the face a bit more, setting up the facebuster for two back inside. Booker gets smart by going after the leg, only to have HHH take out Booker’s leg instead.

The Figure Four goes on so Sharmell rakes the eyes for a save. The slugout goes to HHH, and he tosses Booker outside for a whip into the steps. They head back inside for the spinebuster but Booker breaks up the Pedigree attempt. Some knees to the head set up a side slam but Booker misses the Houston Hangover. The Pedigree finishes Booker without much effort.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t a disaster but it was far from as good as you would have expected from these two. HHH shrugged off everything Booker threw at him and then won clean in the end, which isn’t exactly surprising. I would have expected a bit more than about eight minutes, but odds are they didn’t want to leave HHH out there to get winded early. This could have been worse, though it was pretty lame, all things considered.

We recap Batista vs. Great Khali for the Smackdown World Title. Khali is the new unstoppable monster and Batista is one of the only people who can come after him. That’s a bit of a problem though, as Khali’s Claw/vice grip are rather deadly.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista is challenging and gets pounded down in the corner to start. Khali sends him outside in a heap and hits the big chop on the way back in. That’s only good for two so Khali sends him shoulder first into the post, setting up the nerve hold. The rope is grabbed, meaning it’s a forearm to the back and another nerve hold goes on.

Cole describes the reaction as the fans getting restless, which is certainly one way to go. Batista fights up and blocks the vice grip, setting up the spinebuster. For some reason Batista goes up but dives into the double chokeslam for two. Runjin Singh throws in a chair and Khali hits Batista for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Restless would be one way to go, but the better term would likely be “bored out of their minds”. This was a bunch of sitting around doing nothing until Khali did something pretty stupid and now we are likely in for a rematch, because that is what we needed here. I get the idea of the chase, but the idea of Khali being involved in anything fast paced is disturbing.

Post match Batista gets the chair and blasts Khali for a change. JBL is livid at Khali for doing something so stupid, which is a fair assessment.

It’s back to the office, where Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young come in to see Vince. They don’t think they’re the mother of the son, but Mae wants some relations with Vince RIGHT NOW to make a new son. Mae jumps him and leaves a taste in Vince’s mouth…which he kind of likes. Coach: “That’s disgusting sir!” Vince: “Old chicken makes good soup.”

We recap John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title. Cena has been champion for almost a year but Orton has been on a path of destruction. Now it’s time for Cena to stop him, because no one else can do it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and gets headlocked to start, with the fans really not being behind Cena. The headlock (and really blatant spot calling) continue until Orton reverses into one of his own. Cena can’t counter into the STFU and Orton stomps him down. Back up and Orton keeps it simple with a hard shot to the head which might cause Cena to miss a crossbody.

That means Orton can knock Cena off the apron and onto the announcers’ table for two back inside. The rather aggressive chinlock goes on but Cena suplexes his way to freedom. A missed charge lets Orton get in some more stomps but he misses the big knee. The powerslam doesn’t miss though and we’re right back to the chinlock. Cena tries to power up again so Orton grabs a sleeper with a bodyscissors.

More power gets Cena out of trouble, this time by driving Orton into the corner. Now the comeback is on, including the Shuffle, but the FU is countered into the backbreaker. There’s the hanging DDT as JR is wondering when the concussion is coming. The RKO is countered but Cena misses another charge and falls over the top. Back in and Cena tries the Throwback but winds up with a Blockbuster, which is quite the odd visual coming from him.

The top rope Fameasser connects and Orton is in trouble again. This time the FU is countered with a neck snap across the top. That’s enough to load up the Punt but Orton takes too long and gets pulled into the STFU. The rope gets Orton out of trouble and he grabs a quick RKO for two (that’s still a rare kickout). Cena is done playing around though and hits the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This was a big time fight and Cena felt like he went through a long battle. They were trading big moves but the ending was a bit of a letdown, as Cena kicked out of the RKO and then finished him clean. That doesn’t leave much of a future for the feud, but never let it be said that WWE won’t let something continue despite it looking like it was wrapping up. What we got was good though, as these two were starting to feel it when they went home.

Overall Rating: C. The main event helps a lot and there was enough good to make it work, but Batista vs. Khali was horrible and HHH’s return was a disappointment. It was a bunch of short matches too, with only Orton vs. Cena and Mysterio vs. Guerrero breaking ten minutes. At least we got some good stuff in there though, including a solid main event. Good, but certainly not great show.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2004 (2019 Redo): THUD

Summerslam 2004
Date: August 15, 2004
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,640
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the second biggest show of the year and that could go multiple ways. Smackdown has been getting better as of late but it’s still not very good. Raw has had its moments, but with the second biggest match from the red show being HHH vs. Eugene, they’re working underneath a pretty low ceiling. Let’s get to it.

The theme is the Summer Games, giving us an Olympic themed opening. I’ve always liked these as they’re actually rather entertaining.

The opening video looks at the big matches, but Diva Dodgeball is in the middle, even before the Intercontinental Title and Smackdown World Title matches. I’m thinking no on that one.

Dudley Boys vs. Paul London/Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio

Spike recently joined his brothers and since there are no other teams on Smackdown, Kidman and London are still feuding with the Dudleys. Rey just walks out to his music, which takes a lot of the impact away. D-Von hammers on Kidman to start but gets armdragged down for his efforts. London comes in for an assisted moonsault and the dropkick gets two.

A rather hard clothesline takes London down and it’s off to Spike for some screaming stomps in the corner. Bubba comes in for the trash talking elbow drop and the villains start taking turns working on London. Straight right hands break up the comeback attempt but Bubba hits D-Von by mistake. Spike gets kicked away and that’s enough for the tag off to Mysterio.

The springboard legdrop gets two on Spike and a hurricanrana out of the corner makes things even worse. A reverse DDT plants D-Von and it’s back to Kidman for a top rope back elbow to Spike. Everything breaks down and a BK Bomb gets two on Spike. Bubba gets double dropkicked to the floor and Spike takes a Hart Attack of all things. The 619 sends Spike into the shooting star from Billy for two with D-Von making the save. Back in and Kidman walks into the 3D to give Spike the pin.

Rating: C. Well that was a dumb ending. You have Spike as Cruiserweight Champion and have him pin a Tag Team Champion to open one of the biggest shows of the year? You couldn’t have Rey pin D-Von here to let the fans feel good? This didn’t help anything other than building Spike up, which was done as well as it was going to be with the Cruiserweight Title win. Bad decision here, in a match that didn’t need to have this kind of a finish.

We recap Kane vs. Matt Hardy. Lita slept with Kane to get him to leave Matt alone, actually being stupid enough to believe it would work. As a result Lita is pregnant but still loves Matt. Therefore, she’s marrying the winner of this match. Somehow, not even the most bizarre stipulation in Summerslam history.

Kane vs. Matt Hardy

Matt goes straight at him to start and hits what I guess was a middle rope Side Effect for two. The middle rope legdrop to the back of the head gets the same and a weird looking tornado DDT (with Matt landing on his stomach) gets the third two. Kane finally hits a clothesline to take over but a Lita distraction lets Matt low bridge him to the floor.

The slingshot dive sets up a Twist of Fate for nine and probably the best chance Matt had. Lita throws in the bell and distracts the very stupid referee so Matt can clock Kane for two. Kane kicks him in the face and goes up but gets caught by Matt. That’s fine with Kane, who hits a super chokeslam for the pin and Lita’s hand.

Rating: D. Short and bad here, with Matt having less than no chance throughout. Matt has been destroyed and turned into an idiot this whole feud and Kane winning in the end was the only way it could go. Now just get to the wedding, which is destined to be the most entertaining part of this whole thing. The match was nothing that couldn’t have been done on Raw but with a nice looking ending. That’s also Matt’s last WWE match for about a year as he had a bad knee injury and was then released in April.

Randy Orton doesn’t want to hear about anyone being upset because tonight is a night for celebration. John Cena cuts him off and promises him some merch. He’s an Orton fan, but a quick fan poll seems to suggest that they don’t agree with him. And so it begins.

Booker T. vs. John Cena

Match #1 in a best of five series for Booker’s US Title. They slug it out to start with Cena hitting a clothesline for one. Cena gets in the Throwback for two so Booker crotches him on top to cut that off in a hurry. Booker throws in a You Can’t See Me and drops a knee for no cover. A jumping kick to the face cuts off Cena’s early comeback and it’s a camel clutch to keep things slow.

That’s broken up so Booker goes with a spinebuster and side slam to drop Cena again. The ax kick misses though and Cena hits his running clothesline out of the corner. That just earns him a flapjack into a Spinarooni but Cena hits a quick FU for the pin, ignoring Booker’s shoulder being way off the mat.

Rating: D+. That’s the third straight fast match here and that’s not a good thing on a show like this. They didn’t even have seven minutes here, which is the kind of match that could have been on Smackdown instead of wasting it on this show. Cena is likely losing the next two matches to put him in a hole which is fine, but I could have gone for a better start to this thing.

Eric Bischoff (“the head cracker in charge of Raw”) comes in to see Theodore Long and points out the revolving door to the Smackdown GM office. Bischoff advises him to enjoy it while it lasts but Teddy tells him to get to steppin.

Intercontinental Title: Batista vs. Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Hometown boy Edge is defending and Batista is on fire at the moment. Speaking of Batista, he knocks Edge off the apron during his entrance and we hit the Y2J chants early on. A hard elbow knocks Jericho down and a shoulder does it again. Edge comes back in with a chop block to break up the Batista Bomb though and it’s time for some Canadian violence on Batista. Snake Eyes gets Batista out of trouble but Jericho grabs his boot to slow him down a bit.

A clothesline puts Batista outside and leaves Edge alone in the ring….where he’s booed out of the building. Well that’s rather surprising. Batista gets sent face first into the steps and we’re down to Jericho vs. Edge in the ring. Edge gets the better of the fight but gets loudly booed when loading up the Edgecution. The Walls attempt gets a much better reaction, though Edge reversing into a small package isn’t as well received. Back up and Jericho pokes him in the eye, setting up the full Walls of Jericho.

The hold is pulled back into the middle until Batista finally makes a save with the clothesline. Edge takes Batista down with an Edgecution for two as Jericho is banged up on the floor. The spear is loaded up but for some reason Jericho cuts Edge down on the way to Batista. A spinebuster gives Batista two on Jericho but this time it’s Edge sending the big man outside. That gives us another battle of the Canadians and another loud Y2J chant. Batista gets dropkicked off the apron but the distraction lets Edge spear Jericho down to retain.

Rating: D+. The odd crowd reactions threw things off here, though they’re not quite as out there as you might think when you remember Edge teasing a heel turn as of late. Now that being said, you would think the hometown deal would be enough to overcome the recent cheating but that wasn’t the case here. On top of that, the match didn’t have a ton of heat and was a string of one on one matches instead of all three at once. Edge retaining is fine, though Batista is getting bigger and bigger every week.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle in a Wrestlemania rematch. Eddie cheated (kind of) to win at Wrestlemania in Angle’s last match for about five months. Angle is back now, though while he was on the shelf he cost Eddie the WWE Championship so Eddie is out for revenge and to prove that he can hang with Angle on an even playing field. This has been the best set up feud for the whole show and the match should be able to live up to the hype.

Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Angle has Luther Reigns with him. Feeling out process to start as the odd fans are cheering for Angle here. Shockingly enough Angle is more than fine against Eddie on the mat so Eddie tries for the ankle. He’ll settle for a headlock instead so Angle reverses into a quick keylock. Eddie armdrags him straight into an armbar but it’s time to start the rolling German suplexes. That doesn’t work either as Eddie reverses the second into the ankle lock as the wrestling lesson continues. Angle reverses into the real thing but Eddie puts his own on at the same time. It doesn’t last long, though cool idea there.

A rope finally saves Eddie so Reigns gets in a cheap shot like a good lackey should do. That means another ankle lock before Angle finally switches gears a bit for something close to an STF. With Eddie down, Angle starts untying Eddie’s boot but the delay lets Eddie get in a kick to the face. It’s right back to Eddie’s ankle until Eddie gets in an Angle Slam of his own. Eddie makes his comeback with right hands but the ankle isn’t exactly sturdy.

It’s fine enough for the Three Amigos so Eddie goes up for the frog splash, only to get caught with the running belly to belly superplex. Angle’s Angle Slam is countered into a DDT and another frog splash attempt misses. The Angle Slam gets two so Angle rips the boot off to set up the ankle lock again.

The roll through sends Angle into the referee so Eddie hits Angle and Reigns with the boot. Of course Eddie throws the boot away and falls down instead of hitting a frog splash, which would have made more sense. Eddie hits the frog splash for two a few seconds later and yells at the referee on the kickout. That’s enough for Angle to pick the ankle and put on the grapevine to make Eddie tap.

Rating: C+. What exactly are they saving all the time for on this show? That’s the first match to break thirteen minutes and nothing else has even hit nine. There are three matches left on the card and nearly an hour and a half left in the show, but nothing has even hit fifteen minutes yet. Did Diva Dodgeball need the extra time?

Anyway, this wasn’t all that great as the first few minutes were looking like the start of a thirty minute classic but then they just jumped the stolen finishers (which is becoming a rather tired trope) and had Angle break the ankle down for the win. This was dying for another eight minutes of build towards the finish but for some reason this show has to go as fast as it can because of reasons.

We recap HHH vs. Eugene. HHH found out that Eugene was his favorite wrestler and agreed to use him to help get the World Title if HHH could eventually make Eugene want to quit. In other words, it was a story that was way more complicated than it needed to be and Eugene, who started off as a very fun, unique character has turned into the clueless putz that cost HHH the title. Therefore, HHH must destroy him to prove that he’s better than a mentally disabled person who doesn’t know how to wrestle but imitates wrestling he watched on TV as a kid. In the second biggest Raw match on Summerslam. Of course.

HHH vs. Eugene

No one is at ringside for a bit of a surprise. HHH wins an early slugout but Eugene elbows him in the face so it’s time head outside. That means a chance for HHH to hide behind Lilian Garcia, allowing him to take over again. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Eugene blocks a suplex to the floor. Some right hands in the corner set up a Flair Flop and HHH has a bad knee. Believe it or not, it’s a way for HHH to sucker Eugene in again and outsmart him for a cheap shot.

A backbreaker keeps Eugene in trouble as JR freaks out of the fake injury. He certainly must have loathed Bret Hart then. The fans think Eugene sucks so his comeback isn’t exactly well received. HHH offers a handshake but this time Eugene is ready for him and pulls it into a Rock Bottom. The People’s Elbow is countered with the spinebuster to a face pop as the trip into the bizarre continues. HHH chokes away and it’s back to the floor for a whip into the steps.

Back in and HHH slowly beats on him, setting up the sleeper because this match needed a sleeper. Eugene escapes and hits a backdrop, followed by a middle finger and the Stunner. That’s enough to send HHH outside for a breather though and here’s Ric Flair because HHH is actually in trouble. The big boot into the legdrop connects but Flair gets knocked off the apron. Eugene goes up top and dives into the Pedigree but spins out, setting up a Pedigree on HHH instead. Flair puts his foot on the rope so it’s just a two, earning an ejection. Cue William Regal to knock Flair cold with the brass knuckles as the Pedigree finishes Eugene.

Rating: D. Well thank goodness for that. After a few months of getting frustrated, the great and mighty HHH came back and beat the comedy act in a match at one of the biggest show of the year. All it cost Eugene was all of the good will he built up too, but at least HHH got the big win. This whole story was really stupid and a huge waste of time, which really doesn’t work when it boils down to HHH needing almost fifteen minutes to beat a comedy guy. It was just bad all around and didn’t help anyone other than HHH, who didn’t get that much out of it anyway.

And then, Diva Dodgeball with the Diva Search girls basically in swimsuits while the Raw women are in matching gear. Before the game starts, Coach tells us about some trash talk that happened after Raw went off the air. They proceed to play dodgeball, which is in no way shape or form an excuse to have good looking women in barely existing clothing running around. The Diva Search girls dominate and win. Trish yells about the refereeing and then blames Victoria, triggering a fight. This took up nearly six minutes, which is about seven minutes too long.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Undertaker

No recap for this one because the build hasn’t exactly been thrilling. JBL won the title earlier in the summer and needed an opponent so Undertaker showed up. For some reason JBL decided he wasn’t afraid of Undertaker and brought out a mini version, who Undertaker wound up beating up instead. Then JBL brought in Orlando Jordan as his Chief of Staff because he needed a designated lackey.

Undertaker knocks him to the floor early on and the beating begins, including JBL’s arm going into the steps. Back in and JBL hits a quick swinging neckbreaker before going up top for a good looking top rope shoulder. An armbar doesn’t get JBL anywhere so Undertaker pulls on the arm as well and hits Old School. Undertaker grabs an ugly triangle choke until Jordan pulls the foot under the rope.

With that not working, Undertaker hits a big boot to JBL but misses a running version in the corner to let JBL take out the knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and a Jordan distraction lets JBL smash the leg with a chair. Undertaker gets sent into the barricade so Jordan can get in a few shots before sending him inside. The fans start the Wave as the leg work continues.

The leglock goes on as JBL is smart enough to just throw on a hold and let the fans die down. It’s not exactly thrilling for the fans at home but it’s a smart idea here. Undertaker fights out and pulls JBL down into a quickly broken kneebar. They head outside again with Undertaker hitting the apron legdrop. The announcers start chanting for the Spanish table but JBL snaps the throat across the top for a breather. Again JBL takes too long going up though and it’s a superplex for two.

Jordan throws the belt in for a shot to the head and the very delayed near fall with Jordan grabbing the hand to slap the mat. Undertaker finally beats up Jordan but eats another Clothesline From JBL. With the referee still down, JBL rains down right hands in the corner which is only done to set up the Last Ride. Jordan is back in with the belt so Undertaker takes it away and hits JBL for the DQ.

Rating: D. The thing is, it’s not even the worst match in the world. It felt like it was straight out of the HHH/Ric Flair Greatest Hits playbook with Jordan being the worst Flair impersonator of all time. The leg work was fine and JBL still wasn’t horrible yet, but the ending was pretty lame with Jordan being pathetic and JBL’s finisher not being able to do much damage. It’s not so much horrible or even bad as much as it is uninteresting and uninspired, which made for a very long seventeen minutes.

Post match the beatdown continues with the bloody JBL being chokeslammed through the roof of the limo. JBL does a stretcher job, guaranteeing a rematch. Of note: at some point during the match, a fan tried to climb onto the limo and security kept him from not only, you know, climbing onto the limo but also breaking the roof and injuring himself/ruining the spot.

Cole shows us a replay and tells us to listen. There’s no sound.

Raw World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging after winning a battle royal and pinning Benoit in a tag match. Here’s your exchange that would never happen today: Lawler: “Hey JR you got a camera on you?” JR, dripping with sarcasm: “Yeah right here in my pocket.” The fans are all over Earl Hebner with the YOU SCREWED BRET chants as they stare each other down at the bell. Benoit drives him into the corner and takes Orton down for a rather early chinlock. A test of strength goes to Orton but he misses a knee drop.

Benoit is right back with the armbar and armdrags him down into another armbar. That’s reversed as well with Orton grabbing a Sharpshooter of his own. Benoit slips out of that and tries a Crossface, sending Orton to the floor where he posts Benoit to really take over. A second posting keeps the champ down and Orton drapes him over the top rope for good measure.

Something like a DDT on the apron gets Benoit out of trouble but he misses a dive through the ropes, sending himself HARD into the barricade. Back in and Orton hits the over the shoulder neckbreaker for two, followed by the chinlock. Benoit fights up for stereo crossbodies but gets up first for a northern lights suplex. A release German suplex has Orton in more trouble and the Sharpshooter goes on.

That’s good for two arm drops until Orton makes the rope so they’re both exhausted. Some rolling German suplexes put Orton down again but he gets his feet up to block the Swan Dive (FREAKING OW MAN!). The cover is countered into a Crossface but Orton rolls out. Back up and Benoit tries it again but Orton spins him around into the RKO for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. It’s not a masterpiece but it was a good, long, well put together match with a completely clean ending that made Orton look like the better man. The new heel on top is long overdue and it’s nice to see Orton, who has gotten a lot better in a hurry, win the title here. Benoit’s title reign was very respectable and he beat HHH a few times, which is about as good as you’re going to get. It’s a rather good main event, though not exactly a classic.

Post match Benoit gets back in and shakes his hand, demanding that Orton be a man. Orton shakes his hand and Benoit leaves in peace, allowing Orton to pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is two different halves and it’s as noticeable as you’re ever going to see. The first four matches are all short and need more time while the remaining four, as in the big matches, either fail to live up to the hype or just aren’t very good in the first place. This show needed to be reshuffled a bit with some extra time being given to a few other matches. Stuff like Diva Dodgeball and the opener could have been cut to give the time to other matches. It would have done the show a lot of good, but there was only so much this show could do.

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2003 (2018 Redo): The Second One

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s one of the biggest shows of the year and I can’t bring myself to get excited over it. This show really hasn’t been built up very well with only the Smackdown World Title match with Kurt Angle defending against Brock Lesnar offering much interest. The rest of the show feels very flat, especially the Raw World Title match which should have been Goldberg vs. HHH. Let’s get to it.

The United States Marine Corps Color Guard presents the flag and Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem. As always, it’s an outstanding performance.

The opening video shows a beach but the sun goes behind a cloud and the shot shifts to the Elimination Chamber. The narration basically makes it sounds like the Chamber is poisoning everyone’s souls and turning them all evil, including Kane, who isn’t even in the thing. I’d bet money that Jim Ross wrote that, thinking it sounded even more dramatic than when he gives the Cell human characteristics.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

La Resistance is defending and Bubba brings out the American flag. The Dudleys jump them in the aisle and the beatdown is on with D-Von choking Dupree with the robe. An armdrag into an armbar (FEEL THE HATRED!) doesn’t go very well as Dupree takes D-Von into the corner so the champs can take over. D-Von is right back with the shots to the head, allowing the tag off to the very loud Bubba. It might be annoying, but I can always go for a partner making noise and being active on the apron instead of just standing there.

Grenier gets tied in the Tree of Woe so Bubba can stand between his legs for a loud scream. It’s not quite table time, allowing Grenier to get in a cheap shot so the champs can really take over. Dupree grabs a bearhug, which is quite the odd visual on someone as big as Bubba. A Bubba Bomb gets him out of trouble though and the not very hot tag brings in D-Von for the house cleaning.

Dupree gets powerslammed for two but the champs clear the ring again. The double spinebuster gets two on D-Von (there’s the crowd reaction, and all it took was kicking out of the champs’ finisher). Bubba comes back in for the Flip, Flop and Fly, followed by What’s Up on Grenier. 3D connects but Grenier pulls the referee out, allowing a cameraman to deck D-Von with his camera, giving Dupree the pin. It’s the serviceman from Raw of course.

Rating: C-. The match was ok, but not exactly the hottest choice in the world for an opener. Having the Americans lose to the EVIL Frenchmen doesn’t quite get the show off on the right foot and now we’re likely to see another rematch between these teams as this feud to show off THE POWERS OF AMERICA continues. La Resistance is fine to hold the titles, but they need something more than “we are French and therefore evil”.

Post match Spike Dudley comes in and gets beaten down as well. So after the big American military opening and carrying the flag, the Dudleys lose to the heatless champions again. The Dudleys would get the belts back a month later, but instead we need to see them lose here. Of course we also needed this match instead of the World’s Greatest Tag Team, Rey Mysterio, John Cena or Christian.

Coach tries to talk to the Dudleys but makes the mistake of praising La Resistance’s success. Bubba declares that people who hate America suck and promises to get the belts back.

Christian asks Eric Bischoff why he’s not on the show but Eric blames Steve Austin. Since he can’t wrestle, he offers to be Bischoff’s backup tonight. Bischoff has a plan though and promises to tell the world what happened with Linda on Monday.

We recap A-Train running Stephanie McMahon over last month and costing her a match against Sable. This turned into A-Train vs. Undertaker and WWE actually expects us to believe that this isn’t going to turn into Sable vs. Stephanie again.

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Sable is with A-Train in a rather nice outfit. Undertaker has bad ribs so he dodges a bit to start instead of going in full steam ahead. Instead of staying on the ribs, A-Train tries a headlock, allowing Undertaker to knee him in the ribs and take over. The running DDT gets two on A-Train and Old School connects early on. A shot to the ribs finally cuts Undertaker off (thanks for finally getting the idea Train) and some forearms to the ribs are good for two.

A-Train stays on the ribs with a vertical suplex, followed by a headbutt. Cole: “It’s like being hit in the head with a typewriter.” Normally I would question that, but Cole is the kind of dolt who would do that for fun. Undertaker manages Snake Eyes and a double clothesline puts both guys down for a quick rest.

A slugout goes to Undertaker (well duh) and a big legdrop gets two. For some reason Undertaker tries the Last Ride but a shove gives us a ref bump. The Derailer of course gets a delayed two and the referee gets bumped again. That is way, WAY too popular of a booking trope these days. A-Train hits the bicycle kick to take Undertaker down but gets a chair kicked into his face for two. The chokeslam gives Undertaker the pin.

Rating: D. Matches against power guys like this can be Undertaker’s bread and butter but there’s only so much you can do to make A-Train interesting. The match wasn’t terrible and they kept it slow enough, but this Undertaker stands up for Stephanie thing is about as forced as you can get. There’s only so much you can do as a surrogate for Vince vs. Stephanie, especially when the best villain available for the spot is A-Train.

Post match Undertaker loads up the Last Ride but Sable comes in and rubs his chest. Undertaker grabs her by the throat and STEPHANIE IS BACK!!! WE CAN LIVE HAPPY LIVES AGAIN!!! Stephanie gets to do some catfighting until A-Train pulls Sable out. I guess this is what passes for a big moment around here.

Some fans in the front row think Goldberg is going to win the Chamber. Uh, thanks for that.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff, which starts off looking a lot like Shane vs. Kane. Bischoff then decided that he hated Shane for stealing WCW from him back in 2001. You know, because that’s a story people were thinking about. Eric went after Shane, including having Kane attack him and cost him a match against Eric.

Then Eric went to Connecticut and may have forced himself on Linda McMahon. It came out of almost nowhere and really was more of a complicated way to get to Kane vs. Shane. It’s more of WWE thinking you could just toss a McMahon into a story and everything would be fine, which doesn’t work as well when you do it in two straight matches.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Before the match, Bischoff addresses what happened with Linda, saying it happened again and again and again. Now he knows where Shane gets all of his energy, so here’s Shane in a….complete non hurry actually. Shane pounds him down in the corner with reckless abandon (Or is it still Ruthless Aggression?), followed by some forearms to the ear (called crossfaces by JR).

Eric can’t make it up the aisle as Christian might be coming off like a good idea right about now. A baseball slide sends Eric into the barricade as this has been one sided so far. Shane’s dancing punches take Bischoff down again but the Coach of all people comes in to chair Shane down. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: Bischoff thought COACH was a better option than the Intercontinental Champion? I get that they want to protect Christian from having to get beaten up by Shane but that makes no sense from Bischoff’s perspective.

Eric says he’s restarting the match as falls count anywhere with no disqualifications so Coach sends Shane into the steps for two. They head inside where Bischoff tells the production staff to cut JR and King’s microphones so Coach can do live commentary in the ring. Bischoff throws kicks as Coach does the traditional job of mocking JR. Shane finally gets in a kick of his own and scores with a DDT, only to have Coach hit him low.

That’s enough to make the glass shatter, as everyone knew was coming. Coach does the “I’m not touching you” thing until Shane shoves him into Austin, meaning the beatdown can be on. The dispatching doesn’t take long and Austin orders JR and King’s mics be turned on again. Austin is about to leave but Shane grabs Bischoff’s hand and slaps Austin in the jaw, meaning a Stunner is perfectly acceptable. Shane pulls him up at two though, as the big elbow drives Bischoff through the announcers’ table for the pin.

Rating: F. What did this accomplish? There’s no reason this couldn’t have been the end of Monday Night Raw as the big deal was Coach turning heel. Use this valuable pay per view time (some of the biggest pay per view time of the year) on the people who matter, not for the sake of making Kane look good because he never gets to do that otherwise. This was really annoying, especially when you consider everything that was left off the show so this could get a lot of time.

Beer is consumed post match because this hasn’t eaten up enough time yet.

HHH and Ric Flair get very serious with Randy Orton, telling him that he needs to focus on keeping the title on HHH and nothing more. Orton: “What? I got it.”

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending under tornado rules and one fall to a finish. Tony Chimmel tells us that this is the four way for the US Title before telling us that this is the four way for the US Title. It’s a brawl to start with Eddie staying on the floor, which might not be the smartest move in the world here. With Tajiri sent outside, Benoit snaps the Crossface onto Rhyno, drawing Eddie in for the save. Rhyno clotheslines Tajiri for two and Eddie is there for the save again. Eddie gets triple teamed but Rhyno shifts over to Benoit for some reason.

A powerslam gives Rhyno two on Eddie as it’s still all over the place, albeit not at the fastest pace. Rhyno and Benoit are sent outside, leaving Tajiri to monkey flip Eddie for two. All four are back in with Rhyno superplexing Eddie for two with Tajiri making the save. Tajiri gets the same by kicking Benoit in the head but the champ saves this time. A headscissors puts Rhyno on the floor and Eddie’s rope walk hurricanrana gets two on Benoit.

Tajiri comes back in and gets caught in the Lasso From El Paso but Benoit quickly follows with a Crossface on Rhyno. Eddie isn’t sure what to do but Tajiri making the ropes makes his decision much easier. That earns Eddie a Crossface of his own until Rhyno and Tajiri break it up. Rhyno busts up Tajiri’s spine for two and it’s Benoit rolling some German suplexes to make Tajiri feel even worse.

Tajiri manages to get in one of his own though and bridges back for a close two, leaving everyone down at once. Back up and Tajiri gets Benoit in the Tarantula, leaving Rhyno to Gore Eddie. The problem is Eddie had the US Title in his hands to bust up Rhyno’s shoulder, leaving him down in pain. Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two as Tajiri dives in for a save, only to have both of them fall outside. Eddie sneaks in with a frog splash to pin Rhyno and retain the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match that was trying hard to be great. There were a few too many dead spots in there though and they never hit a higher gear that they were capable of, but at least they did well with what they did. Eddie stealing the pin after cheating with the belt makes perfect sense for him and it’s the right idea to keep the title on him with the roll he’s currently on.

We look at Brock Lesnar destroying Zach Gowen, who will be out for a good while as a result.

Earlier tonight on Heat, Matt Hardy accepted a forfeit win over Gowen.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock beat Angle for the title at Wrestlemania and Angle went on the shelf. While he was out, Angle and Lesnar became friends, which lead them to Vengeance where Angle won the title back in a triple threat. A few weeks later, Lesnar turned on Angle to join forces with Vince in the name of being the REAL Brock Lesnar. Brock attacked Angle in a cage and left him laying, which has only ticked Angle off coming in to the title match.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock is challenging and we actually get an old school rules explanation from the referee. They hit the mat to start with Angle getting the better of it (not exactly shocking) and frustrating Lesnar early on. Another takedown looks to set up the ankle lock but Kurt goes to a headlock that Brock can break far more easily. Odd thinking there. Back up and Brock shoves him away without too much effort so Angle armdrags Lesnar outside, frustrating Brock all over again.

Kurt follows him outside and starts in on Brock’s knee before sending him into the barricade. Back in and the first suplex gets two on Brock, who responds by gorilla pressing him out to the floor in a big crash (great visual with Angle just falling to the floor). Now it’s Brock’s turn for a suplex as he’s starting to look all surly. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Kurt and we hit the rear naked choke before that meant much to a lot of fans. It’s off to a regular bodyscissors instead, followed by a chinlock.

Of course Angle fights up (after Brock let go of two better holds), this time being cut down by a hard knee to the ribs. A hard clothesline drops Angle again and the move that would become known as Shell Shock (complete with walking around the ring) gives Brock two. Some shoulders in the corner stay on Angle’s ribs so Kurt hits him in the face. You don’t do that to Lesnar though and Angle gets more shoulders to his ribs for his efforts.

Brock’s big running charge goes into the post though and Kurt’s running shoulder block staggers Lesnar. A dropkick to the knee has Brock in more trouble and it’s time to roll the German suplexes (with Lesnar holding the shoulder off each one). The Angle Slam doesn’t work and Brock goes back to the ribs with a spinebuster. Since one finisher is countered, the other has to be as well so Kurt reverses the F5 into a good looking DDT for two of his own. Now the Angle Slam is good for two and Angle is even more fired up.

In my favorite Angle spot, he puts the straps back up so he can take them down all over again. The ankle lock goes on but Brock rolls forward, sending Angle into the referee. Kurt charges at him for what looks like a sunset flip but stops halfway, wrapping his legs around Brock’s neck and arm (almost in an upside down triangle choke). Since that’s not the easiest hold to maintain, Angle switches over to the ankle lock for the tap but there’s no referee.

Cue Vince to chair Angle in the back, setting up the F5 for a delayed two. Another F5 is reversed into the ankle lock to put Brock in real trouble. He grabs all four bottom ropes but the hold isn’t broken for absolutely no apparent reasons, meaning Brock has to tap to retain Angle’s title.

Rating: B+. It’s not quite their Wrestlemania match but Angle getting his win back makes sense….in theory. They’ve been building Lesnar up as the unstoppable monster for the last few weeks so it would have made sense to have him win here (with Vince’s help) before losing the rematch down the line. That being said, I’m fine with Angle retaining here as it makes sense from the long term. In other words, this one depends on how you look at it, but it’s a rather strong match either way.

Vince gets an Angle Slam through a chair to wish him a happy birthday.

We recap Kane vs. Rob Van Dam. Kane lost his mask and despite Van Dam trying to calm him down and say that he didn’t need the mask, Kane went crazy and started destroying everything in his path. This included beating up Van Dam, Shane McMahon and Linda McMahon and setting Jim Ross on fire. This seems to be setting up Kane vs. Shane, but first Van Dam gets his shot tonight.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

No Holds Barred, which is added right before the match. JR refers to Kane as the “byproduct of an inbred mongrel dog”. As I so often wonder of both JR and Jim Cornette: WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS STUFF??? Van Dam tries to start fast but gets clotheslined down in short order. They head outside with Kane sending him into the barricade but charging into a boot, allowing Rob to follow up with another kick to the face.

Van Dam gets posted though and it’s time for a ladder. Rob is smart enough to kick it into his face, followed by a top rope kick to the chest. A crossbody puts them both on the floor and of course Kane takes over again. The announcers talk about what Kane did to Linda, which is both a good and bad idea. It’s good in that it shows you what Kane is capable of and how evil he is, but it also shows you how unimportant this match is because it’s all about Shane vs. Kane down the line.

Back in and another kick to Kane’s face knocks him into the corner (there’s certainly a pattern here) as JR deems Kane smelly. Kane shoves Rob off the top and down onto the barricade as the violence starts to go the monster’s way again. The ladder to the face drops Rob again and it’s time for some simple choking. Thankfully the referee doesn’t break it up because that comes off as barring a hold, which might get a lawyer involved with his life.

Rob gets kicked outside again and this time Kane follows by going to the top, only to dive into the barricade by mistake (that looked bad on replay as Kane seemed to slip, leaving him without enough distance and sending him head first into the barricade). Now it’s Rob getting in a ladder shot, which Kane of course shrugs off.

A DDT on the floor knocks Rob silly but he’s able to drop toehold Kane into the steps. The spinning kick from the apron drops Kane again, followed by Rolling Thunder onto the chair. Kane sits up so Rob dropkicks the chair into his face for good measure. The Van Terminator misses though and a Tombstone onto the steps is enough to end Rob.

Rating: B. Nice brawl here but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it didn’t mean anything given the story they’ve already told us is coming. Rob was trying here though and made the match fun, especially with the story of the wrestling going to Van Dam and the hardcore stuff going to Kane, but we’re heading for Kane vs. Shane and everyone knows it.

Bischoff is banged up and doesn’t want to talk about his loss but Linda McMahon comes in. Eric starts stammering and gets slapped in the face as the billionaire gets revenge. I can totally relate.

Flair gives HHH a final pep talk.

The Chamber is lowered.

Long recap on the main event, which also features a look at the Chamber. HHH was scheduled to defend against Goldberg one on one but a torn groin necessitated a multi-person match because Heaven forbid HHH take a spear and Jackhammer and lose in a short match with the excuse that he wasn’t ready or was wrestling hurt or any other idea they had. Somehow we get Kevin Nash in another main event though, because that’s what the world was waiting for. There have been some personal issues added after the match announcement but it still feels a little thrown together.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash

The intervals are three minutes this year because we need to move this along. Goldberg slips during his entrance, which is edited out of the Network version (though he goes from standing in the middle of the stage to a few steps to the right off a camera cut). Shawn and Jericho start us off as the fans chant for Goldberg. They hit the mat to start for the Flair pinfall reversal sequence before trading slaps.

Shawn backdrops him but has to switch to a small package to escape the Walls attempt. Jericho can’t hit the Lionsault so instead we’ll listen to JR mess up history by saying this title has only changed hands once before in Arizona. That’s some nice sounding trivia, but remember that this title isn’t even a year old yet and has its own lineage. Sure that doesn’t mean much, but this is the way WWE has set things up and they can’t keep it straight. Anyway, Orton is in third with a high crossbody for two on Shawn, followed by the signature backbreaker gets the same on Jericho.

The RKO is broken up though and Jericho backdrops Orton onto the steel. Now the Walls work just fine on Shawn but it’s Kevin Nash in fourth. That’s enough for Jericho to break it up and go after Nash, who isn’t happy with his new haircut. I find it rather spiffy, even as Nash throws Jericho into the Chamber wall. Nash’s side slam gets two on Orton and Jericho is busted open. Nash goes over for a Jackknife, only to get superkicked down, allowing Jericho to roll him up for the pin, meaning Nash was in there for all of two minutes.

HHH is in fifth….and Shawn superkicks him right back into the pod. Nash isn’t done yet though and Jackknifes Jericho and Orton as a parting gift. Shawn, who is down off throwing a superkick, covers both villains for two each. Everyone punches it out until Goldberg is in to complete the field. Right hands and forearms abound and it’s the spear to get rid of Orton in short order. Jericho gets launched onto the cage floor again and another spear sends him through the Plexiglas.

As Goldberg gets back in, Shawn scores with a forearm followed by the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music misses though and it’s a spear and Jackhammer to get us down to three. The same thing gets rid of Jericho and it’s HHH (who still hasn’t gotten out of the pod) vs. Goldberg for the title.

Flair shuts the pod again and holds it shut as well as he can, only to have Goldberg break the “unbreakable Plexiglas”. Some right hands keep HHH in trouble and Goldberg sends him into the Chamber walls a few times. A clothesline takes him down again and HHH is busted open. Goldberg loads up the spear but Flair slips HHH the sledgehammer to knock Goldberg cold and the title is retained.

Rating: D. This wasn’t even twenty minutes long. The best way to describe this match would be a middle finger to the fans who are nearly dying to see HHH lose that freaking title already but we need to make sure he’s ready to give Goldberg the rub or something. I’m not sure how WWE can validate keeping the title on HHH when they have Goldberg right there and HHH can barely move, but I’m sure it’s just the right thing to do, at least according to HHH. That’s 2003 in a nutshell: cheer for whomever you want, but you get HHH.

The rest of the match was of course nothing because Goldberg was the only person who could conceivably win the thing. Instead of something competitive and compelling, it was fifteen minutes of waiting around on Goldberg, then Goldberg crushing people for a few minutes, and then HAHA IT’S THE SLEDGEHAMMER AGAIN! The ending was so deflating that there’s not

Evolution beats Goldberg down and handcuffs him to the Chamber because WWE needs to demonstrate how to book Goldberg.

Overall Rating: D. The show isn’t even that bad, but rather almost completely flat. There are a few good matches with Brock vs. Angle being a highlight but that just made me want to watch the Wrestlemania match again. The TV coming into this show has been really dull due to a lot of McMahons and while they were used more sparingly here, you could still feel them throughout the whole show. That main event really took the life out of the whole thing though and there was nothing else that was going to fix things. Not a good show, but it could have been worse.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boys

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: C-

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

2013 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: F

Rhyno vs. Tajiri vs. Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B+

2018 Redo: B-

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

2018 Redo: B+

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: B

HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: D

That’s one of the hardest swings I’ve ever had on a show but you can see a little consistency in there somewhere.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/08/summerslam-count-up-2003-meet-the-old-hhh-same-as-the-new-hhh/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2001 (2021 Redo): The Definitive Version

Summerslam 2001
Date: August 19, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, San Jose, California
Attendance: 15,293
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

I’m not sure how it happened but this show was twenty years ago. We’re in the middle of the Invasion so this is going to be a rather Alliance heavy show. That may or may not be a good thing, but the double main event of Steve Austin vs. Kurt Angle and Rock vs. Booker T. would likely fall on the good side. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a naration-less highlight package set to Bodies by Drowning Pool. I guess you don’t need words for a story as simple and easy to follow with so few moving parts as the Invasion.

Intercontinental Title: Lance Storm vs. Edge

Storm is defending and feels the need to explain the issues with offbeat shenanigans. After saying that the silence from the crowd is “splendid” (such an awesomely underused word), Storm is cut off by Edge’s entrance and we’re ready to start fast. They run the ropes a bit until Edge knocks him outside. That doesn’t last long and Edge comes back in with a high crossbody for an early two. Storm sends him crashing to the floor though and it’s back inside for those unique stomps.

A gordbuster gets two on Edge and Storm starts in on Edge’s ribs. Storm tells him to get up so Edge does with some right hands, only to miss a dropkick. So now Storm is happy that Edge is back down. Make up your mind dude. Edge gets shouldered in the corner as we cut to the WWF locker room, including Christian (with Edge’s King of the Ring trophy) watching (as they are known to do).

The chinlock with a knee in the back has Edge in more trouble and we hit the abdominal stretch. Edge fights out and sends him to the apron so Storm springboards back in, right into a powerslam. A spinwheel kick gives Edge two and the Edge-O-Matic gets the same. Storm is fine enough to roll him into the Canadian Mapleleaf but Edge makes the rope (to a heck of a reaction). Edge gets his own Mapleleaf so here is Christian….who spears Edge by mistake to give Storm two. Edge has had it with this and Impales Storm for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. The Christian stuff advanced the story, but the point here was everything else going on. Storm and Edge had some good chemistry together and while Storm was always in need of a better finisher, they had an exciting match here and it got the fans off on the right foot. That’s why you put these two in this spot and it worked out well.

Post match Christian grabs the title and seems to think about something before handing it to Edge.

Test, who recently joined the Alliance, and the Dudley Boyz are ready to destroy the APA and Spike Dudley. Test is sick of the WWF sounding stupid and the Dudleys are sick of being overshadowed by Spike. Tonight, Test will show you loyalty.

Test/Dudley Boyz vs. Spike Dudley/APA

Molly Holly is here with Spike and the APA. Faarooq slugs away at Bubba to start but it’s quickly off to D-Von for a clothesline. Test gets a chance of his own and is clotheslined down by D-Von. The fast tags continue as D-Von comes in and gets DDTed. We get to the important part as Spike comes in for some rollups until Bubba drops him onto the top rope. The stomping is on in the corner as Heyman is very pleased with the “tough love”.

It’s table time (JR: “This is not a tables match!” Heyman: “It’s a Dudleys match!”) but Spike slips out of a gorilla press. He gets caught with a double flapjack though and the villains get to beat on him a bit more. Spike gets in a shot of his own though and the hot tag brings in Bradshaw to clean house. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw powerbombs D-Von for two. Spike gets puts through the table as the Clothesline From Bradshaw blasts D-Von. The referee is distracted though and Alliance boss Shane McMahon chairs Bradshaw to give D-Von the pin.

Rating: C. The match was nothing memorable but it kept a midcard story going and give us some nice action at the same time. The chair shot at the end will give them somewhere else to go and Spike vs. his brothers would work almost every time. I can always go for a good six man and this was close enough.

Some WWF wrestlers are upset but others are too busy congratulating Edge. Christian interrupts and says he has a European Title match tomorrow. Edge doesn’t seem thrilled with Christian stealing his moment but Grandma Edna calls Christian….so she can talk to Edge instead. With plans made for later, Grandma hangs up instead of talking to Christian again. This continues to work.

Shawn Stasiak interrupts Debra (Steve Austin’s wife) and complains about his trunks. Debra tells him to buzz off because Austin has a big match tonight. If Stasiak wants to impress Austin, go beat someone up.

Cruiserweight Title/Light Heavyweight Title: X-Pac vs. Tajiri

Title for title and I do miss the X Factor theme. Both guys hold up both titles and we’re ready to go. Pac takes him down in a hurry to start and the posing is on. Tajiri sweeps the leg and hits a standing moonsault as we hear about Pac’s career in Japan. Back up and Tajiri sends him outside for a baseball slide as the pace picks up in a hurry. Pac manages to send him into the barricade to take over and hits a spinning kick to the face back inside. There’s the surfboard, which seems almost required in this spot.

Back up and Pac grabs a sitout powerbomb for two but the Bronco Buster misses, mainly because Pac takes WAY too much time running around like a moron. Some kicks give Tajiri two and the Tarantula makes it worse. Tajiri’s bridging German suplex gets two but Pac sends him outside for the big running flip dive. The handspring elbow is broken up and a quick X Factor gets a delayed two. Cue Pac’s buddy Albert, who gets misted down in a hurry. That’s enough for Page to hit a low blow into an X Factor to retain/win.

Rating: C. The one good thing about Pac is he could have a fine match with just about anyone and did so here. Tajiri can go with all kinds of opponents as well so they had a nice setup here. I wonder if that first X Factor was a timing issue, as it was a finisher that didn’t go anywhere and then they did the angle to finish it. Either way, perfectly fine match for titles that mean nothing.

Perry Saturn is at WWF New York and is looking for Moppy (his mop). He even has her on the side of a milk carton.

Stephanie McMahon gives Rhyno a pep talk about all the things she wants him to do to Chris Jericho.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Rhyno. Jericho has tormented Stephanie McMahon for months so she is sending Rhyno after him. Violence is promised.

Chris Jericho vs. Rhyno

Stephanie is here with Rhyno. The slugout is on to start until Jericho hits a running forearm to take over. A top rope elbow to the head has Rhyno in trouble but it’s way too early for the Walls. Rhyno misses a charge and flies out to the floor so Jericho goes up. Stephanie grabs the foot, earning herself a kick away, but the distraction lets Rhyno Gore Jericho out of the air (which doesn’t get the reaction it deserves). It takes some time for both of them to get back in, where Rhyno drops him ribs first across the barricade.

Stephanie gets in a slap (the most lethal move in the company) and Rhyno grabs a bodyscissors to (wisely) stay on the ribs. With that not getting very far, Rhyno changes things up a lot with an airplane spin into a TKO of all things. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Jericho fights up, only to get knocked down again. Rhyno misses a top rope splash (because Rhyno is known for his flying) and they’re both down. Jericho fires off some running shoulders but slips on the Lionsault attempt.

Instead Jericho connects with the top rope elbow to the face but Stephanie gets up for a distraction. That warns her a kiss (which makes me wonder how much money there would have been in a forbidden roman angle between these two) and Jericho catches Rhyno with the bulldog. Now the Lionsault connects for two but Rhyno grabs a belly to belly to set up the Walls on Jericho. The rope is grabbed so Jericho snaps off an enziguri but has to avoid the Gore. The missed charge lets Jericho get the Walls for the tap.

Rating: C+. This worked well and a lot of that is due to Stephanie, who made this whole story work in the first place. I know she gets a lot of flack but when she actually has someone show her up, it really does make things better. The match itself was Jericho vs. a (talented) monster and that was going to work all day. This wasn’t the show stealer or anything, but it was a rather nice match with a well told story. That’s all you need a lot of the time.

Stephanie storms off, as she should.

William Regal stops the Rock to ask if he’s ok after an attack from Booker T. on Smackdown. Of course the Rock is hurt but he’s here at Summerslam and the only thing Booker T. did was tick him off. Rock asks if Regal can hear the crowd and feel the….unspecified something. Regal certainly can, but can he smell it? They step aside for a charging Shawn Stasiak, and Rock confirms that you certainly can smell it. Stasiak is a guilty pleasure but Rock didn’t have much to say here.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy is defending in a ladder match, which should write itself. They actually go technical to start for an early standoff, though the fans stay into it because they know what’s coming. Van Dam misses a dropkick and gets caught with the legdrop between the legs. Back up and Hardy is sent to the apron, where he hiptosses Van Dam outside. A springboard Whisper in the Wind drops Van Dam again but he’s right back with a kick to the face.

There’s the spinning kick off the apron to the back and it’s time for the first ladder. As usual, that takes too long so Hardy gets in a shot of his own, only to have Van Dam see saw the ladder into Hardy’s face. Hardy is right back by pulling Van Dam onto the ladder for an Arabian press onto Van Dam onto the ladder. Van Dam ties him in the Tree of Woe for some shoulders to the ribs and the ladder is laid across the bottom rope.

That means Rolling Thunder out of the corner to crush Hardy again, setting up a slingshot legdrop over the top, onto Hardy and onto the ladder. Hardy gets in a shot of his own and goes up, only to have Van Dam come off the top to kick the ladder down. Now it’s Rolling Thunder onto the ladder onto Hardy, leaving him down again. Van Dam goes up so Hardy dropkicks it down this time to leave them both in a heap.

This time it’s Hardy going up, and promptly being superplexed back down. They both go up again, with Hardy hitting a heck of a sunset bomb for another double crash. Hardy goes up and grabs the title but Van Dam moves the ladder, leaving Hardy hanging. Since Van Dam can’t pull him down, it’s a top rope spinning kick to knock Hardy out of the air for the huge crash. That’s enough for Van Dam to pull down the title, with Hardy not getting there in time.

Rating: B. This wasn’t about psychology or anything else, but rather “can you top this”. That was the absolute right way to go for these two as they’re both insane high fliers who can do that style like few others. It’s also what the fans wanted to see here and the guys delivered, leaving very little room for complaining. Sometimes you need a human car crash and these two are as good as there were at it at this point.

Shane McMahon gives Booker T. a present: bookends made from the table he put the Rock through on Smackdown. Booker dedicates his match to Shane, who is rather pleased.

We recap Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon vs. Undertaker/Kane. Page stalked Undertaker’s wife Sara, filming her at home and passing the tapes around the locker room. He even had a shrine to Sara set up at the arenas (must have been the travel version). Page got Kanyon to help him so Undertaker found Kane, and since we need all the wacky titles around here, this is title for title in a cage.

WCW Tag Team Titles/WWF Tag Team Titles: Undertaker/Kane vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon

Title for title in a cage with pinfall, submission or escape. Undertaker slams the door shut (with a good THUD) and we’re ready to go, with Sara holding the key. The violence begins in a hurry with Page and Kanyon getting beaten down without much trouble. Page manages to send Undertaker into the cage and hits a clothesline, only to get kicked in the face. Kane kicks both of them down and the first chokeslam plants Kanyon.

A powerbomb drives Kanyon into the cage and Undertaker’s running boot drives Page into the wall as well. Kanyon is back up and tries to escape in the corner, allowing him to hammer at Kane’s head. The Brothers are actually down but sit up at the same time, meaning the double chase is on. Undertaker winds up on top of the cage and punches Page down, but tells Kane to let Kanyon go.

Page gets up and realizes what is going on, meaning torture can ensue. A side slam plants Page again but Undertaker pulls him up at two. Undertaker pulls out a chain to send Page into the cage before telling him to get out of here and live. Page tries to leave and is chokeslammed back down. Serves him right for being an idiot. The Last Ride ends Page for the pin and both titles.

Rating: C. I think I remember hating this one before, but it makes sense in context. No one was expecting Undertaker and Kane to have trouble with these two goons and that’s what happened here. This should have been a squash, both for the sake of who was in there and the story they were telling. It wasn’t a competitive match, but why should it have been? Who in the world is supposed to be able to hang with Undertaker and Kane in a cage anyway?

The Rock tells the trainer that he’s fine and, after sidestepping a charging Shawn Stasiak, promises to win the WCW World Title.

We recap Steve Austin vs. Kurt Angle for Austin’s WWF Title. Austin turned on the WWF at InVasion because he thought Vince McMahon wanted to hug Angle instead of him. Angle became the face of the WWF and went on a roll throughout the company, tearing everyone apart along the way. Austin was all that was left and it’s time for the big showdown. This gets the well deserved music video treatment.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

Austin is defending and they start in the aisle before the bell. Angle gets tossed inside to officially start and takes Austin down without much effort. An exchange of right hands in the corner goes to the more aggressive Angle but he gets elbowed in the back of the head. It’s already time to go after Angle’s knee with some cannonballs and a twist, but Angle reverses into a quickly escaped ankle lock.

Austin gets two off a suplex, with JR saying it won’t be the last. On cue, Angle rolls some German suplexes, ducks a clothesline and rolls some more German suplexes. After getting Austin away from the ropes, Angle rolls some more German suplexes but the Angle Slam attempt is reversed into a whip into the corner. A top rope superplex plants Angle again but Austin’s own back is messed up. There’s a Stunner out of nowhere for two and Austin (who is walking a bit funny) yells at the referee.

Another Stunner sends Angle outside and Austin whips him into the post to draw some blood. More postings have the blood flowing even faster and Austin sends him in a fourth time for a bonus. Back in and Angle kicks out at two so Austin throws him outside again. Angle manages to send Austin over the barricade for a breather but Austin puts him down on the concrete as well.

That’s fine with Angle, who grabs the ankle lock on the steps and drags Austin back inside (that was cooler than it should have been) but Austin crawls back outside to escape. A belly to belly on the floor rocks Austin again and there’s a belly to back to make it worse. Back in and Angle ACTUALLY HITS THE MOONSAULT (I’m actually not sure when I’ve seen that work so you know it’s a big match) for two but Austin is right back with the Million Dollar Dream.

That’s good for two arm drops, plus a great closeup of Angle’s bloody head. Angle powers out but walks into another Stunner for two. A desperation Angle Slam gets a delayed two and the ankle lock goes on, but Austin hits the referee. Angle grabs a DDT for two from a second referee, so Austin hits Angle low and Stuns the referee. A third referee comes in and gets hit with the belt, meaning the Angle Slam gets no count. Cue Alliance referee Nick Patrick to DQ Austin instead.

Rating: A-. This was a heck of a fight with both guys laying into each other and telling a great story. Both guys were on their game and Austin simply could not beat him. That is how you set up a rematch, which is exactly what they did next month when Angle won the title in his hometown. Outstanding match, and the last great one of Austin’s career.

Angle destroys Patrick to blow off some steam.

JR EXPLODES on Heyman, shouting about how Austin couldn’t beat Angle, with Heyman basically no selling the whole thing.

We recap Booker T. vs. the Rock. The Rock had returned and confirmed that he was still with the WWF by laying out Shane McMahon. He was still the People’s Champion, which Booker didn’t like. Rock didn’t care what Booker had to say but Booker challenged him for Summerslam. Game on, complete with Booker putting Rock through a table with the Book End to bang up his ribs.

WCW World Title: The Rock vs. Booker T.

Booker, with Shane McMahon, is defending. Rock knocks him outside to start but stops to chase Shane, allowing Booker to get in a few shots. The Samoan drop gives Rock two abut Booker is back with a knee to the ribs. A side kick gives Booker two but Rock tosses him over the top for the crash to the floor.

Booker is sent into the announcers’ tables a few times but is back up to crotch Rock on the barricade. They go over the barricade to keep up the brawl and then head back inside for the slugout. Rock punches away until another kick to the face cuts him down. The chinlock goes on as commentary gets in another argument over the Spinarooni. That’s broken up and Rock grabs the Sharpshooter, drawing Shane back up to the apron.

With Rock taking care of Shane, Booker is able to get back up for another kick to the face. A catapult sends Booker face first into the (exposed) buckle for two so Shane grabs the title…and is taken out by the APA in revenge for earlier. The referee checks on Shane so the Book End only gets a delayed two. Rock’s big jumping clothesline into the belly to belly gets two and the spinebuster connects. The People’s Elbow gets two as Shane grabs the referee and Booker is back with a spinebuster of his own. The ax kick sets up the Spinarooni….but Rock nips up into the Rock Bottom for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. They were in a tough spot here for a few reasons. First of all, the Rock was several levels above Booker and there was no way around it. As great as Booker was, he wasn’t the Rock and that was very obvious. On top of that, you can only get so far when you’re following Austin vs. Angle going 22 minutes. They tried to have all of the extra stuff going on here to make it feel huge, but it came off as a matter of time rather than a big showdown.

Rock celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This was a heck of a show with some great matches and almost nothing close to bad. The one two punch of the main event is awesome, with Storm vs. Edge and the ladder match making it even better. Angle vs. Austin is still white hot as a main event story and things should get better heading into the fall. They wouldn’t, but based on what they had here, they should. Awesome show and worth watching for sure.

Ratings Comparison

Edge vs. Lance Storm

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2021 Redo: B-

APA/Spike Dudley vs. Test/Dudley Boys

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2021 Redo: C

Tajiri vs. X-Pac

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2021 Redo: C

Rhyno vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2021 Redo: C+

Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B

2021 Redo: B

Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon vs. Undertaker/Kane

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2021 Redo: C

Steve Austin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

2013 Redo: A-

2021 Redo: A-

The Rock vs. Booker T

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B

2021 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2021 Redo: A-

I think we’ve come to just about as definitive of a version of this show as I’m going to have.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/04/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2001-summerslam-gets-all-alliancey/

And the 2013 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2021/08/03/summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2001-2013-redo-the-alliancey-one/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – 2000 (2023 Redo): This Show Always Gets Me

Summerslam 2000
Date: August 27, 2000
Location: Raleigh Entertainment and Sports Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 18,124
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Of all the shows that I’ve seen multiple times over the years, there is something about this show that never stands out. I can never remember anything about the show, down to barely being able to come up with the main event. That’s a weird one as this is from one of the most well received years in WWF history. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is designed like some art house/weird film, featuring Freddie Blassie watching a video on the main event. That would be Rock defending the WWF Title against HHH and Kurt Angle, but the real story is the love triangle between HHH, Angle and Stephanie McMahon.

Jim Ross brags about the $1.1 million gate and that always sounds weird.

Right To Censor vs. Rikishi/Too Cool

Before the match, Steven Richards says he was thinking the Right To Censor would be better received here in the Bible Belt. Rikishi brings two of the Goodfather’s former ladies with him, with one of them being identified as Victoria. It’s a brawl to start until Scotty gets two hammer Bull down in the corner. Too Cool’s double suplex lets Scotty dance a bit so it’s off to Goodfather. That doesn’t go well either as Sexay knocks him to the floor, where he shoves the women down.

Back in and a double big boot gives Bull two as JR has fun saying “Sexay”. Richards adds a powerbomb for two, only to get caught with a superplex. The diving tag brings in Rikishi (not holding the tag rope because rules mean nothing) and house is quickly cleaned. Victoria sends a departing Richards back inside and the villains are stacked up in the corner. Three straight running hip attacks look to set up the Stinkface but Buchanan makes the save. The Steven Kick finishes Scotty at 5:23.

Rating: C. Well, ok then. I’m not sure why you would have Rikishi and Too Cool lose in the opening match and kill the mood like that but the Right To Censor was a slightly bigger deal at the moment. The match itself was what you would expect, but I was actually surprised at the result, which is kind of a nice feeling.

Kurt Angle and Stephanie McMahon went to find each other earlier, despite HHH not being here yet.

We look back at Angle kissing a concussed Stephanie on Smackdown, in a story that could have gone a long way.

Hardcore Champion Shane McMahon supports Stephanie’s decisions….and has to run away from Steve Blackman.

Road Dogg vs. X-Pac

This is the result of X-Pac headbutting Dogg off the apron and through a table, which left X-Pac surprised for some reason. X-Pac takes him to the mat for some riding and Dogg isn’t happy. Back up and Dogg sends him outside before hitting a clothesline back inside. X-Pac kicks him into the corner though and the Bronco Buster connects. The chinlock brings Dogg back up so X-Pac kicks him in the face for two more. Another Bronco Buster connects but this time Dogg is back up with the shaky jabs. The pumphandle slam is loaded up but X-Pac kicks him low and hits a quick X Factor for the pin at 4:40.

Rating: C. Not much to this one either as they’ve had a pair of short matches to start the show. That would seem to be a heel turn from X-Pac as the villains continue their hot start. X-Pac and Dogg teamed together for a bit but it never felt like the real DX. The Outlaws would have made for a better feud like this but with Billy Gunn out injured, this is about all you can get.

Post match X-Pac says they’re still a good team, but Dogg gets up and hits the pumphandle slam.

Eddie Guerrero and Chyna are ready for their mixed tag for the Intercontinental Title. Chyna says one of them are getting lucky.

Trish Stratus and Intercontinental Champion Val Venis are ready for the match, but Venis gets annoyed at Stratus saying she would be a better centerfold than Chyna.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna/Eddie Guerrero vs. Trish Stratus/Val Venis

Venis and Stratus are defending and it seems that only Stratus can’t leave as champion. Eddie and Val start things off with Eddie hitting a jumping elbow and grabbing a northern lights suplex for two. Back up and Chyna comes in to deck Venis in the face and it’s a double flapjack for two. Val cuts Chyna off with a knee to the ribs but Chyna blasts him with a clothesline.

Chyna makes the mistake of going after Trish though and Val is right on her with a suplex. Another suplex has Chyna adjusting her gear and even JR has to comment on how….non-existent some of the gear is. Eddie tries to come in and that’s enough for Chyna to get in a low blow.

That and a DDT are enough or Eddie to come in and clean house, including the hurricanrana out of the corner for two. Venis’ Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same so for some reason it’s off to Trish. This goes as well as expected, as Chyna wrecks her with some clotheslines until Venis makes a save. Eddie pulls Venis out though and Trish’s clothesline makes her fall down instead. A gorilla press gives Chyna the pin and the title at 7:04.

Rating: C+. There’s the first feel good moment of the show as Chyna exploits the completely legal loophole to win the title. That being said, it makes a lot more sense, as Venis, even the serious version, did not feel like someone who belonged as Intercontinental Champion in 2000. Eddie and Chyna really were great together and you could feel the chemistry here.

Eddie puts the title on Chyna in a nice moment.

We look at a WWF Radio live broadcast from WWF New York. Mick Foley danced and Chyna liked his worm.

Stephanie McMahon makes it very clear: Kurt Angle kissed her…..but he’s good at it.

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

Tazz attacked JR and it’s time for Jerry to stand up for him. For a bonus, Tazz attacked Jerry’s rental car with JR inside, hurting JR’s eyes. As a result, here is Tazz with a Tazz themed JR hat and a cane to really be a jerk. Lawler punches him in the face to break up the blind bit and even adds a dropkick into the corner. There’s the middle rope fist but a second misses, allowing Tazz to hammer away.

Tazz rips at the face and before having to headbutt Lawler a bit low to cut off a comeback. For some reason Tazz goes up and misses a Swanton of all things, meaning it’s time for the strap to come down. The piledriver connects but the referee gets bumped. Tazz gets the Tazmission but yells at JR once too often, causing JR to break a jar of candy over his face. Lawler gets the pin at 4:25.

Rating: C. You know what you’re going to get with a Lawler match and that limited offense was on display here. That being said, Lawler’s matches still work because the fans care about him and wanted to see him beat Tazz up. It’s someone standing up to a bully and that is always going to work, no matter how limited Lawler happens to be in the ring.

Shane McMahon has to run from Steve Blackman again.

Hardcore Title: Shane McMahon vs. Steve Blackman

Shane is defending and runs into the ring to hide from Blackman, as apparently hide and seek isn’t Shane’s strong suit. Blackman brings in his own kendo stick and trashcan, which are enough to have Shane running again. Actually hold on as Blackman is nice enough to throw the stick to Shane and turn his back. Blackman isn’t that stupid though and grabs the stick to chase Shane off for the….are we at four times already?

They go into the crowd with Blackman getting in a trashcan shot as the beating begins. Back to ringside and a hard kick drops Shane again as this is destruction so far. The spinning trashcan lid shot to the back of the head keeps Shane in trouble (and looked PAINFUL) and now it’s time for a bunch of weapons. Blackman puts the trashcan on Shane and unloads with the sticks (JR: “Like Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7!”) before grabbing a leather strap.

Said strap is tied around Shane’s neck so he can be pulled off the middle rope for a crash. To make things interesting, Blackman grabs a half crab while still choking but here are Test and Albert for the save. As Lawler points out that JR is bleeding from something, Albert crushes Blackman in the corner and Test adds a hard clothesline. Test’s always good looking top rope elbow crushes a trashcan lid onto Blackman’s chest and now Shane is back up for the dancing punches.

A quick comeback bid is cut off in a hurry and Shane hits a jumping street sign to the face. The strap is tied around Blackman’s neck for a change and they take him up towards the entrance. Test can’t quite shove a speaker onto Blackman as he rolls away but can’t do anything else. Albert kendo sticks Test by mistake though and NOW the comeback can be on.

Well for all of a few seconds at least, as Shane gets in a cheap shot and then runs away. Shane makes the mistake of climbing the set (like I said: hiding isn’t his strong suit) but Blackman is there with more stick shots to knock him down for a twenty five or so feet fall down onto a bunch of stuff. After climbing down a bit, Blackman drops a huge elbow for the pin and the title at 10:17.

Rating: B-. The wrestling wasn’t the point here (obviously) but this was a heck of a star making performance for Blackman. Granted there is only so far you can go with this kind of a personality but this worked well for him. Blackman fought off three people at once and then hit the big elbow at the end for the win. This was WAY more fun than I would have bet on and was a nice change of pace from the rest of the show.

Shane is taken away on a stretcher due to reasons of HE FELL A REALLY LONG WAY.

Stephanie McMahon freaks out over the whole thing when Kurt Angle comes in. She immediately asks about Shane, who Kurt says had the wind knocked out of him (Lawler: “THE WIND KNOCKED OUT OF HIM???”). Mick Foley comes in and references the kiss from Smackdown before leaving rather quickly.

Video on Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho. They hate each other so now it’s time to go 2/3 falls. Shane McMahon has been in Benoit’s corner but….yeah.

Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

2/3 falls. They go straight to the mat for the slugout to start until Benoit avoids a charge to send the shoulder into the post. It’s too early for an STF or the Crossface so Jericho snaps off a belly to back suplex. A shoulder breaker takes Jericho back down as Lawler talks about how much he hates being in 2/3 falls matches. Jericho is right back up with a missed Lionsault and now the Crossface goes on. Jericho taps at 3:16, which Lawler thinks was a strategic move (or, you know, the Crossface hurts a lot).

The Crossface goes back on (smart) and Benoit cranks HARD until Jericho makes the rope. Benoit ties him in the Tree of Woe so he can pull on the bad shoulder some more. Back in and the shoulder is sent hard into the post as Jericho can’t get anything going here. Benoit does it a second and third time but Jericho slugs away with the good arm. That’s fine with Benoit, who snaps off a German suplex. A second attempt is countered into the Liontamer though and Benoit has to tap at 8:40 to tie it up.

Jericho hits a backbreaker for two and a top rope elbow to the jaw gets two. The arm gives out on a powerbomb attempt so Benoit is back with a dragon suplex for two of his own. Benoit goes up but gets pulled down with a super hurricanrana for the double knockdown, with Jericho landing on the bad shoulder again. Back up and Jericho hits some running clotheslines, followed by the spinwheel kick for two. The Lionsault connects but the shoulder gives out again. With nothing else working, Jericho stomps away but Benoit grabs a cradle and uses the ropes for the pin at 13:21.

Rating: B. I wasn’t wild on the ending, if nothing else because it made me think of the same way Benoit vs. Kurt Angle at Wrestlemania X7 went about eight months later. What matters here though is how good the chemistry between these two really is. They know how to work off of each other and the arm vs. back stuff worked well. You know that these two are always going to work well together and that was the case again, as they had some time and put together a heck of a match.

HHH JUST NOW arrives so we look at the Smackdown kiss again, plus the near second kiss from earlier tonight.

We recap the Tag Team Title match. Edge and Christian, the Dudl….it’s the first TLC match. You get the idea.

Tag Team Titles: Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

Edge and Christian are defending. The Hardys grab some chairs to start but Edge and Christian take over rather quickly. It’s already time for the first ladder but Bubba sends it into Edge’s face for a nasty smash. Bubba’s climb is cut off by a Hardys powerbomb, with Bubba’s leg being caught in the ladder for a nasty landing. Edge is back up with a double Russian legsweep to bring D-Von and Jeff off the ladders and the Bubba Bomb drops Christian hard as well.

Jeff is knocked off a ladder and lands on another, sending it straight into Matt’s face for more pain. D-Von puts a ladder in the corner and that means it’s What’s Up to Edge. It’s time for the tables (that sequence still works) and a 3D puts Christian through one. Four tables are stacked up on the floor (uh oh) but Edge grabs a chair to save Jeff from a rather large powerbomb. Ever the grateful one, Matt hits a Twist of Fate on Edge, setting up the legdrops from/over the ladder to hit Edge again.

Jeff rams a ladder into D-Von’s face (ouch) as Matt crushes Edge inside a ladder. Christian goes up and is rocket launched onto the ladder onto Edge onto the ladder. With that not being enough, the big ladder is set up on the floor so Jeff can….miss the Swanton to Bubba through the table.

Matt throws the normal ladder outside and grabs the big one so everyone but Bubba and Jeff can go up. The other four come crashing down so a very staggered (thanks to a chair shot) Bubba comes in but Edge and Christian shove him through the pile of tables at ringside. Cue Lita to shove Edge and Christian’s ladder over for a double crotching so Matt can go up.

That ladder is shoved down as well, with Matt crashing through more tables at ringside. Edge spears Lita down but somehow Jeff is back up to climb with D-Von. They both grab a belt but the ladder is moved, leaving D-Von to crash. Edge and Christian are back in to spear Jeff down with the ladders (ouch again) and the titles are retained at 14:47.

Rating: A-. You know what you’re getting with these matches and they continue to be incredible. This was all about having six people (and Lita as a bonus) going out there and wrecking each other in pure carnage. It also doesn’t feel like a bunch of random spots as you have stuff set up and paid off later, with the teams actually working together. This is so much easier to watch (and remember) than having six to eight people going nuts, with the bumps and crashes looking better as well. Awesome stuff here, and somehow they would do it even better.

Everyone gets a well deserved standing ovation.

HHH yells at Stephanie McMahon (who apparently he hasn’t seen since Smackdown) about the kiss, with Stephanie saying Kurt Angle took advantage of her. He orders her to stay away from Angle, but she insists HHH is the only man for her.

The Kat vs. Terri

Stinkface match and Al Snow is here with the Kat. Cue Perry Saturn to cover Terri up, with JR not getting the logic. Lawler: “Why can’t we get this match? I get Tazz!” Kat slams her down to start but Saturn pulls Terri outside. Back in and….I’m not sure if that was a spear or a clothesline but it sets up the catfight. The Bronco Buster connects as JR notices they’re both in rather large heels. The referee gets crushed so Snow throws in Head to knock Terri cold. Kat gives her the Stinkface for the win at 3:03.

Rating: F. To call this wrestling would be an insult to wrestling as they’re not hiding what they’re going for here. This stuff is embarrassing these days and while Terri had some value as a manager, this was a total waste of time. I know why it was there, but put anything else on instead of this nonsense.

The Acolytes toast Vince McMahon at WWF New York. And seem to take his money.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kane. Undertaker came back a few months ago and as is custom, Kane turned on him. It’s time for the first Biker Taker vs. Kane showdown.

Undertaker vs. Kane

The fight starts in the aisle, with Kane being sent into the post. Undertaker goes evil by trying to rip off the mask so Kane grabs a chair (the referee had said he would let them fight). That’s broken up so Undertaker chairs Kane down and manages to rip off part of the mask. That fires Kane up so he sends Undertaker in the steps, only to have said steps hit the post.

Undertaker grabs the steps to hit Kane in the face instead and the bloody Kane is sent back inside. A low blow gives Kane a breather and he slugs away until Undertaker spears him down. More of the mask is ripped off and Undertaker kicks him low to block a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker gets the whole mask off and Kane walks out at we’ll say 7:20.

Rating: B-. It was barely a match, but I’ll take these two having a slugout fight instead of watching them do a regular match. That’s what you would want to see from this and they made it work. It never made a ton of sense to have them going technical and with chinlocks and such ala Wrestlemania XIV, so go with what makes sense here and get some more value out of the thing.

Kurt Angle calls….Stephanie, as HHH is getting ready next to her. Stephanie: “Hi….mom!” HHH wants to talk to her but there’s no one on the phone.

We recap the WWF Title match, with the love triangle being the main story and The Rock, the champion, just kind of being thrown in on the side. Angle and HHH got a double pin in a triple threat #1 contenders match to set this up and they’ve been off to the races since.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

The Rock is defending. Before the match, Angle apologizes….for not doing what he did a lot sooner. Cue HHH and the fight is on fast, even with no Rock. Angle manages a Cactus Clothesline to put both of them on the floor and Angle gets posted. HHH loads up the announcers’ table but it collapses as he tries the Pedigree, with Angle bouncing face first onto the floor.

With Angle clearly knocked loopy, HHH grabs the sledgehammer but here is the Rock to officially get things going. Rock hits a clothesline and heads to the floor as well while Angle is taken out on a stretch. HHH manages to drop Rock onto the other announcers’ table and they head back inside as this has turned into a singles match for the time being. Rock gets sent back outside as HHH runs up the aisle to pull Angle back to ringside (even Lawler thinks this might be too far).

Rock comes back to break that up and takes HHH back to ringside for a low blow…..as Stephanie McMahon comes out to check on Angle. With Angle gone, HHH hits a clothesline on Rock but here is Stephanie to cheer on HHH. The jumping knee gets two on Rock and HHH tells Stephanie to get the belt. Stephanie slaps the timekeeper and comes in with said belt, which hits HHH by mistake.

HHH is back up with a low blow and demands Stephanie go to the back, as we settle down for maybe the first time so far. Back in and a sledgehammer to the ribs drops Rock, which sends JR into a rant about someone GETTING THE HAMMER. Some shoulders to the bad ribs keep Rock in trouble and the facebuster gets two. The slow beating (and JR’s rants about the hammer) continues but Rock is back with his swinging neckbreaker.

HHH knocks him down again and goes up, earning himself a superplex for a huge crash. We cut to the back where Stephanie is imploring Angle to get off the stretcher and help HHH. He says he’ll do it for her, with Lawler thinking this might be too much. Cue a rather concussed Angle as Rock fires off the right hands in the corner.

A quick Pedigree gives HHH two, with Angle pulling HHH out and whipping him into the steps. Angle gets his own two on Rock and hits a belly to belly for the same. The Rock Bottom gets two with HHH making the save this time and let’s get the sledgehammer again (JR getting more and more sick of it is hilarious). HHH’s right hand hits Stephanie by mistake so Angle sledgehammers HHH down. Rock clears Angle out and drops the People’s Elbow to retain at 20:07.

Rating: B-. This was a VERY uniquely booked match and I’m not sure it worked. The idea of having Angle taken out of the match for such a long time was strange enough but Rock vs. HHH was THE feud of 2000 so it was hardly a stretch. The problem seems to be more that Rock is just kind of there while everything else is playing around him and that makes for an odd match. It was still good, but it’s much more of an oddity than anything else. Also, just to make it worse, according to Angle, the concussion was scripted but he wound up getting a legitimate one and has pretty much no memory of the match.

Overall Rating: B. This show started slowly but once it picked up, it picked up very well. The first three or four matches are pretty much nothing to see but once Steve Blackman comes out to save it (….didn’t expect to say that), it was mostly awesome, safe for a few bumps in the road here and there. Overall it’s certainly worth a look, with the unfortunately forgotten TLC I and Benoit vs. Jericho certainly being worth your time.

 

Ratings Comparison

Right to Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi
Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C

X-Pac vs. Road Dogg
Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2023 Redo: C

Val Venis/Trish Stratus vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chyna
Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2023 Redo: C+

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler
Original: C+
2013 Redo: D
2023 Redo: C

Steve Blackman vs. Shane McMahon
Original: B
2013 Redo: B-
2023 Redo: B

Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho
Original: A
2013 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: B

Dudley Boys vs. Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boys
Original: A-
2013 Redo: A
2023 Redo: A-

The Kat vs. Terri
Original: F-
2013 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Kane
Original: B
2013 Redo: C
2023 Redo: B-

The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle
Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2023 Redo: B-

Overall Rating
Original: A
2013 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: B

There is a lot of jumping around in here and it made for quite the interesting rewatch.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.