Monday Night Raw – July 7, 2003: Not Even For A Canadian Dollar

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 7, 2003
Location: Bell Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Please let Austin be back tonight. Last week was the Eric Bischoff Show with Eric restarting a bunch of matches and turning the show upside down in a bad way. The big story is Kane attacking almost everyone in sight in his latest path of rage. That might be what Austin wants though so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Kane being all attacky.

Here’s the returning Austin to a heck of a reaction. We even have to pause for a bit as the fans cheer him on even more. Last week he had some food poisoning to go with about six Mexican food TV dinners so it wasn’t the best night. He watched the show last week and saw Eric Bischoff take a chokeslam so tonight, it’s Austin’s show. Let’s get right to it with the first match.

Intercontinental Title: Booker T. vs. Christian

Christian is defending. Before the match, Christian says he’ll just take the countout but Austin says the title can change hands via countout or DQ. Austin throws him inside and we’re ready to go. Booker slugs away to start and hits a big backdrop before raining down some right hands. Christian heads outside though and gets Booker to chase him outside, allowing him to get in a few shots. A hot shot onto the turnbuckle gives Christian two and we hit the chinlock.

Back up and Booker scores with the side kick as this really isn’t lighting the world on fire so far. The ax kick gets the pin….with Booker’s foot on the ropes. Of course we’re restarting the match because Heaven forbid we have a match without some kind of shenanigans. Back from a break with Booker fighting out of a chinlock and getting two off a rollup. Christian slips out of a suplex but walks into the Book End for a rather close two.

Booker takes too long going up though and gets crotched, only to shove Christian down. The missile dropkick gets two but we stop for the Spinarooni. The referee blocks the ax kick for some reason though (unless Christian pushed him into the way, I have no idea what that was) and Christian gets in a low blow for two more. Christian misses a belt shot and the second ax kick gives Booker the title.

Rating: D+. These two just don’t work well together and it’s more and more apparent every time they’re out there together. Booker winning was the only way they could have gone and they did the title change just soon enough that people still cared. Not a good match here but the right call.

Mark Jindrak thanks Austin for an opportunity tonight but something has happened. Post break, Austin finds an injured Tommy Dreamer. Austin has to send the Dudleyz away so medics can work on Tommy.

JR and King talk about the Montreal Screwjob and we look at a clip of the incident. Shawn Michaels will be discussing the moment later tonight on the Highlight Reel.

Here are Theodore Long, Rodney Mack and new recruit Rosey. The man has been getting them razzle dazzled lately and he’s not happy. Last week, Jazz lost the Women’s Title without being eliminated from the battle royal. Christopher Nowinski has a concussion but they’re not going to let that get them down (Nowinski would never wrestle again and has since become an expert on concussions). Tonight though, they’re going to teach Rosey to back the mack by means of thuggin and buggin.

As Teddy talks, we cut back to Dreamer being loaded into the ambulance. Bubba goes off to find out who did it. I don’t see this ending well.

Hurricane vs. Rosey

Hurricane offers a handshake but goes with a cheap shot instead. What a villainous act. Rosey drops him with a hard shot and drops the big leg. The Samoan drop ends Hurricane in short order.

Post match Rosey turns on Long and Mack, only to get beaten down for his efforts. So to recap: Mack got squashed by Goldberg in less than a minute and now we’re supposed to be interested in his feud with Rosey? Oh and Hurricane gets squashed too. If there’s a point to this booking, I’m not seeing it.

Bubba accuses Evolution of attacking Dreamer but Orton has an alibi: he was in the back drinking a protein shake. Austin comes in and gives Bubba a tag match if he can find a partner (the other Dudleyz went to the hospital with Dreamer). Jackie Gayda comes up to say something has happened to Rico.

Post break, a bloody Rico says Kane did it.

Victoria/Steven Richards vs. Gail Kim/Val Venis

Gail gets to take off the towel, immediately making her seem a lot less important than she did last week. To make things worse, Victoria gorilla presses her down but gets caught in a hurricanrana. King: “Looks like Gail Kim likes to ride on top.” The men come in with Venis getting two off a spinebuster. Victoria offers a trip though and Steven grabs a DDT for two. It’s back to Gail for a top rope wristdrag and Richards elbows Victoria by mistake. Everything breaks down and Gail grabs a hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: D-. And so much for Gail. This match made her look more like a fluke who can do a hurricanrana than anything else. She debuts one week and the next week is getting involved with Val Venis? There’s no way this can end well for her and the match was disappointing to say the least. It’s good that she didn’t get pinned but she’s going to need something more to brag about than just that.

Trish Stratus is warming up when Test comes in to hit on her. She’s on his list of women who might want to hook up with him. Trish isn’t impressed so Test grabs her, which brings in Kevin Nash of all people for the save. A match is made for later.

It’s Highlight Reel time with Jericho being a huge crowd favorite for a change. Tonight, Jericho is here to deal with with someone who committed horrible actions against Canada. We see another clip of the Montreal Screwjob and here’s tonight’s guest: Shawn Michaels. Shawn says he’s apologized to Bret himself but never to the fans in Montreal. He apologizes that the whole incident ever happened but what he’s most sorry about is the fact that the fans have never managed to get on with their lives.

Only Montreal cares about what happened all those years ago (well that and WWE it seems). They’re stuck back in November 1997…and there’s the YOU SCREWED BRET chant. Shawn: “And your point would be what?”. Jericho calls him sanctimonious but Shawn wants the fans to pick something else to dislike about him. Like, you know, beating Jericho at Wrestlemania earlier this year.

Jericho insists that no one is ever going to forgive Shawn, who accuses Jericho of being Mr. Canada. Well you know that gets a face pop. Shawn is ready to go right now but Jericho turns him down because he wants a better payment not based off the Canadian dollar. Instead, he’ll face Shawn in two weeks in Hollywood. Jericho says screw Montreal and we’re out. Seriously, that’s all we get. Jericho makes the fans boo Shawn over Montreal and then gets them to boo himself for the sake of setting up a match where Shawn will be cheered in two weeks. That’s their best use of nearly fifteen minutes?

Austin finds Kane in his office and goes over Kane’s reasons for wanting to quit. He tries to get Kane to be a monster in the ring instead of backstage because that’s where it matters. Austin thinks Kane would be cheered if he goes out there, so it’s either go to the arena or be fired. Kane stands up and leaves, touching the wall with a bloody hand as he goes.

Test vs. Kevin Nash

Nash clotheslines him in the corner to start before getting in some elbows to the jaw. Test gets knocked outside but manages to post the bigger man to take over. Back in and a turnbuckle pad is removed but here’s Trish for a failed distraction. Instead Test kicks Nash in the face for the fast pin. Is feuding with Test the official punishment for a horrible main event? I think I can live with this.

Test shoves Trish down and then into the barricade.

Booker T. is very happy to win the title and leaves with Terri.

Chris Jericho vs. Mark Jindrak

Jindrak has a great look but really bad, generic rock music. Jericho kicks him in the face and then scores with an enziguri as the fans aren’t exactly reacting to Jindrak. The Lionsault hits knees though and Mark comes back with some incredibly basic offense. The fans already think he’s boring so Jericho dropkicks him out to the floor. Back in and Mark escapes the Walls, followed by the jump to the top for a spinning clothesline. He’s certainly athletic. A low blow cuts Jindrak off though and the Walls make him tap.

Rating: D-. Oh goodness no. Jindrak has a great look and is crazy athletic but that’s the extent of his skills. I completely get why he was given this spot but it was a heck of a botched debut with Jindrak looking terrible, to the point where you would think he was fresh out of wrestling school. When Jericho can’t save you, you know it’s a bad night.

This Sunday on Heat: Maven vs……HHH? Well ok then.

Molly Holly vs. Trish Stratus

The winner gets a title shot next week. Trish is very banged up to start and of course Lawler is right there to point out the thong sticking out. Molly easily takes over to start and gets two off a Hennig necksnap. We hit the neck crank for a bit before Molly switches to ripping at Trish’s jaws. Trish comes back with a victory roll for two but Molly cuts her off with a snapmare to stay on the neck. A shoulder breaker into a neck stretch makes Trish tap.

Rating: D+. Molly’s offense made perfect sense and it’s fine to have Molly win over a very banged up Trish but there’s only so much you can do in four minutes with one of the participants barely able to move. Of course Lawler talking about Trish’s underwear made things worse but that goes without saying. Gail beating Molly should help her, though it doesn’t matter if she doesn’t get some better offense.

Kane finally agrees to go to the ring.

Ric Flair/Randy Orton vs. Bubba Ray Dudley/???

The partner is….Rob Van Dam. Rob and Randy start things off with a spinning crossbody getting two on Orton. Flair grabs the boot though and Orton gets in the signature backbreaker. Some Flair stomps set up a great looking dropkick from Randy as this is one sided so far. It’s back to Flair for the Figure Four, which gets next to no reaction. It could be because it goes nowhere other than right back to Orton to stay on the leg. Just a hunch of course.

Rob finally kicks Orton away and brings Bubba in to a limited reaction. A neckbreaker drops Randy and Flair gets slammed off the top for two. Rob comes back in with the kick to the chest as everything breaks down. Orton tries to break up the Five Star but Spike Dudley comes in to break it up, allowing Rob to splash Flair for the pin.

Rating: D. I know a crowd can carry a match to a much higher level but egads the crowd is killing anything this show has going on tonight. They do not care about what’s going on out there, though in this case it’s not like it means much. Orton can’t even get a pin over Bubba Ray Dudley? And this guy is supposed to be your big bright star of the future? Put him over someone important then.

Here’s Austin to call out Kane, still with a towel around his head. The fans kind of cheer with JR acting like it’s Foley winning the title. Austin talks about Kane getting cheered but they care about what happens when Kane is throwing people around. We see a clip of Kane chokeslamming Eric Bischoff last week, which Austin describes as funny. That’s too much for Kane, who thinks Austin is calling him funny. Kane unloads on Austin until some right hands make the comeback. Austin gets in a chair shot and a Stunner but the bloody Kane sits up. A chokeslam to Austin ends the show.

Overall Rating: F. No HHH, no Goldberg, Kane turns heel (for what feels like the second time in a few weeks), the big segment is reminiscing about the Montreal Screwjob and the best match is a nothing to see Booker T. title change (which the crowd did care for). This felt like a big punt instead of any kind of effort and it was very clear that they don’t know how to handle this lack of a pay per view. It wasn’t even the worst show in the world but rather just really boring and that’s worse in this case.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event – November 30, 2017: The New Normal

Main Event
Date: November 30, 2017
Location: Thompson-Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

Things have been changing around here lately with both Raw and Smackdown clips airing instead of just the ones from the red show that had been the case for so long. We’re also back to a normal week in WWE after the huge Survivor Series weekend last time around. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Apollo Crews vs. Curt Hawkins

Crews shoves him down a few times to start and grabs a headlock takeover for good measure. A slingshot hilo gets two but Hawkins sends him throat first into the ropes. We hit the reverse chinlock with a knee in the back until Hawkins heads outside to yell at Titus O’Neil. Hawkins gets two off a top rope elbow, only to get caught with an enziguri. The Toss Powerbomb gives Apollo the pin at 5:15.

Rating: D. I’m not sure how many times you can watch this match and still get anything out of it. We get the idea already but that’s not going to stop WWE from running the thing over and over again around here. Now that being said, it’s just Hawkins so does it really matter that much? I can’t imagine there was that much thought put into the thing, which should be the case.

From Raw.

Here’s Reigns to open things up. Last week was a big week for him as he and the Shield beat up New Day. Then he had an opportunity and we see a clip of him winning the Intercontinental Title. After the show was over, Shield came back out and put Miz through a table. This is his yard and this is the title so if you want it, come get it. Cue the Miztourage to say they know someone who wants the title. This brings out Elias of all people to say he wants the title. Reigns thinks it sounds like Elias wants to walk with the big dog, but after tonight he might have a neck brace like Curtis Axel.

And from later in the night.

Intercontinental Title: Roman Reigns vs. Elias

Elias is challenging. They trade shoulders to start with Elias getting the better of it and slapping on a reverse chinlock. Elias gets two off a clothesline and we hit a regular chinlock. Back up and the Miztourage offers a distraction so Elias can get in a hard knee for a near fall.

We come back from a break with Elias getting kicked in the face, only to have Reigns stop and take out the Miztourage instead of following up. The distraction lets Elias take Reigns down and drop a top rope elbow for a rather near fall. A sitout powerbomb gets the same but Reigns is right back with a Superman Punch for two of his own. Back up and the spear retains the title at 14:48.

Rating: B-. While the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt here, it was still a good, hard hitting match. They’re certainly protecting Elias at the moment and I’m not sure what to make of that. It would be nice if they had him actually win something but with the Intercontinental Title now basically the show’s World Title, he’s kind of stuck. But at least it was a good match.

Post match Samoa Joe sneaks in and chokes Reigns out. No Rollins for the save either, mainly because this was a Reigns singles match and not a Shield match. That determines who comes out for a save you see.

And again from Raw.

Paige/Mandy Rose/Sonya DeVille vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks/Mickie James

Alexa Bliss is on commentary……and there’s no Mickie or Bayley. Paige and company come out and laugh off the idea of Sasha having no partners. We cut to the back where Mickie is holding her shin and Bayley is holding her neck. Paige laughs this off and says she’s tired of hearing about her interfering last week. Last year, she was THE woman in WWE and helped erase the word Diva from WWE (we could have a tournament for everyone who takes credit for anything like this).

Now she and her friends, named Absolution (sounds like a bad perfume) are here to take things back. Rose and DeVille talk about how everyone has tried to be the next big thing but they remember how Paige started all of this. Paige offers Sasha a spot on the team but she forearms Paige off the apron. The beatdown is on in a hurry with everyone hitting a finisher. No match of course.

Now from the Smackdown counterparts.

Charlotte/Natalya/Naomi vs. Riott Squad

Yes Riott and no I don’t know why. During Charlotte’s entrance we see clips from Starrcade, WHICH SHOULD HAVE BEEN FREAKING BROADCAST ON THE NETWORK! Logan takes Natalya into the corner to start and scores with a clothesline. It’s off to Charlotte but that’s enough for Natalya, who walks out on the match less than a minute in. Back from a break with Charlotte fighting off the trio but getting caught by the numbers game on the floor. Morgan gets two off a floatover suplex and it’s off to Ruby for a chinlock. That leaves the other two Squad members to take Naomi down on the floor.

They send her hard into the steps and then bridge them over the barricade, catapulting Naomi face first into the steel. The best the referee can do is glare at them, making me wonder HOW IN THE WORLD THIS ISN’T A DQ. Seriously do they need to break out a pair of nunchuks and beat the stuffing out of Naomi before the match is called off? So it’s now three on one with Charlotte actually managing to fight them off for a bit. A spear hits Morgan in those impressive abs but Logan hits a knee from the apron, setting up the Riot Kick to the face for the pin at 9:12.

Rating: D+. The beatdown was impressive enough though none of them seemed capable of hanging with Charlotte or Naomi on their own. That already puts them a few steps back of Absolution (I can feel my brain melting as I write these names over and over) but at least they’re looking a bit more polished than people like Mandy Rose. Not a great match or anything but the divide and conquer strategy worked just fine.

Kalisto/Gran Metalik vs. Brian Kendrick/Jack Gallagher

Metalik headlocks Kendrick to start but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. Kalisto comes in and cranks on the arm so it’s off to Gallagher. A whip sends Metalik outside in a heap and we take a break. Back with Metalik breaking away for the hot tag as everything breaks down. The Salida Del Sol is broken up but Metalik tags himself in and kicks Gallagher in the head. The rope walk elbow is enough to end Jack at 3:34.

Rating: D+. There’s not much to say about these things, though I still like Metalik more often than not. They have entertaining matches, even if it’s a match you can write out before it even starts. It’s also the standard Main Event idea: Gallagher and Kendrick would win this 9/10 times on 205 Live but they’re dead in the water on this show. Again it’s predictable but not the worst thing in the world.

Back to Smackdown.

Singh Brothers vs. AJ Styles

Before the match, Jinder Mahal attacks AJ, sending him ribs first into the post. After a break (and Mahal doing his standard promo), the match is on with AJ getting double teamed. The Brothers get in some shoulders to the ribs in the corner but AJ kicks them away without much effort. AJ knocks the two off them off the top, kicks Mahal in the face, and blocks a super hurricanrana attempt. He’s not done yet though as it’s a SUPER STYLES CLASH with one Singh landing on the other for the easy pin at 3:56.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much to see but it was exactly what it needed to be, especially with an awesome ending like that. Really, what else was AJ supposed to do against a couple of goons like this? Styles vs. Mahal isn’t an interesting story but at least Mahal has goons to send out there instead of having us watch the same match over and over.

Post match Mahal lays out the Singh’s, including a TERRIBLE looking Khallas to the second one. The guy’s head and back never came close to the mat as he basically bounced off his elbow (it looked even worse in slow motion). As I’ve said many times: Mahal just isn’t very good and that finisher makes things even worse.

And then to Raw to wrap things up.

Jason Jordan vs. Kane

Before the match, Jordan talks about how he’s an athlete and knew his knee was banged up last week. Kane actually gets powered into the corner a few times to start but the suplex is broken up. A hard toss sends Jordan outside where he comes up holding the knee again. That’s enough for a countout at 1:42.

Post match Kane stays on the knee until Finn Balor comes out for the save. They stare each other down and we take a break.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Kane wastes no time in whipping Balor into the corner and we’re into an early chinlock. Balor dropkicks him outside and hits a dive as the announcers talk about what a big deal a win over Kane would be. Kane hits him in the ribs with a chair for the DQ at 2:44.

Kane beats on him with the chair and wraps it around Balor’s throat until Braun Strowman comes out for the save. A chair to the back has no effect on Strowman and the beatdown is on. Strowman destroys him with the steps and a chair, including a powerslam onto the steps. Kane gets his throat crushed on the chair and staggers into the crowd (probably looking for registered voters) to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. All this show did was make you remember how hit and miss some of these shows can be. Raw and Smackdown weren’t exactly great this week and cutting them down to the clipped versions of the matches and ignoring some of the better stuff (Rollins vs. Cesaro from Raw for instance) isn’t the best idea. I do like them adding in more stories though as it makes the show feel more like a full on recap than anything else, which is a good idea. It really might be better to cut out one of the original matches though, just so the recaps don’t feel as crammed together.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – June 30, 2003: And It’s Bad, Bad Bad

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 30, 2003
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re closing out the first half of the year with the big story of Kane losing his mask. After the better part of six years with no one knowing what he looked like, Kane lost his mask last week in a match given one whole week of build up. You know, on the show that has needed back to back Kevin Nash pay per view main events. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of the end of last week’s show, including Kane laying out Rob Van Dam with a chokeslam.

Opening sequence.

Chris Jericho is in the ring for the Highlight Reel. While everyone has been talking about Kane, let’s have a beauty instead of a beast. Therefore, his guest tonight is Stacy Keibler, who comes out with Scott Steiner, much to Jericho’s chagrin. Before we get going, Steiner removes her garter. Jericho asks Steiner to leave and I’ll let you figure out how that goes.

We move on to Stacy’s photo shoot for Stuff Magazine and Lawler rather likes the pictures. Jericho hits on Stacy and calls himself legendary. Stacy makes references to Jericho being, ahem, legendarily small. That’s enough for Jericho to bring out Test as his second guest so the beatdown can ensue. Eric Bischoff comes out to call it off and say that he’s in charge tonight because Steve Austin isn’t here. As for the people in the ring, it’s Steiner/Stacy vs. Test/Jericho.

Here’s Lance Storm to say that he is NOT boring, and he has the dictionary definition to prove it. This doesn’t go far as some music cuts him off.

Goldberg vs. Lance Storm

And no match as Rodney Mack jumps Goldberg from behind. Not that it matters as a spear cuts Mack in half and the Jackhammer (Jackknife as JR says) has Teddy Long hopping mad.

Bischoff is in the back with Kane, who has a towel over his head. Eric wants Kane to address the people in the name of ratings. Kane shakes his head no so Bischoff offers him a World Title shot tonight. That’s still no so Bischoff gives RVD the title shot instead. If Kane doesn’t go out into the arena though, he’s fired.

Women’s Title: Battle Royal

Trish Stratus, Victoria, Jazz, Ivory, Molly Holly, Jacqueline, Gail Kim

Jazz is defending and this is Gail’s debut. It’s a brawl to start with Gail hitting a decent looking hurricanrana on Molly. Ivory is catapulted out, making the last few weeks of her defeating Jazz over and over pretty much a waste of time. Jazz gets hurt somewhere in there and is taken out by the trainers (she would be out until December with a shoulder injury, which may be why it’s this instead of a regular match).

Molly and Jacqueline are out too and we’re down to Gail, Trish and Victoria in less than two minutes. The Stratusphere is broken up and Trish is knocked out, leaving Gail to armdrag Victoria. A powerbomb attempt is countered into a hurricanrana to put Victoria out and make Gail champion.

Rating: D-. I’m guessing that was due to Jazz’s shoulder injury and if so, that’s fine. Gail winning the title was a nice little surprise, though it’s not like it matters much anyway. The division isn’t going to get better without something resembling a story and this isn’t exactly thrilling. Somehow this is the only title Gail would win in WWE. You would have expected her to win another just by the amount of time she was around but somehow it never happened.

Intercontinental Title: Booker T. vs. Christian

Christian is defending and jumps Booker in the aisle before the bell. They head into the crowd with Booker beating Christian around as referees can’t break it up. We’re joined in progress after a break with Booker slugging away and getting two off a backdrop. Christian snaps the back of Booker’s neck across the ropes though and we hit the chinlock.

The second version keeps Booker down again as JR and King talk about how Test can do ANYTHING he wants to Stacy tonight because it’s a wrestling match. You know, because there are no rules to a wrestling match at all. Back up and Booker misses the side kick into the ropes, setting up a backbreaker for two. Christian dives into a side kick though and both guys are down with Christian’s stunned face being a nice bonus. Another kick to the face gets two but the Book End is broken up.

The ax kick is countered into a rollup with trunks for two but Booker plants him with a flapjack. But first, a Spinarooni. Booker gets crotched on top so Christian superplexes him down, right into the small package to give Booker the pin and the title. I’m not even going to bother going to the rating as Bischoff comes out to say all four shoulders were down. Therefore it’s a draw and Christian retains the title.

Rating: C. This is another good example of a feud where they don’t know how to just get it over with already and it’s making for a bad story. Booker vs. Christian is fine for a once off but this is several weeks now with nothing being all that great in the first place. Get to something else already or just give Booker the title.

RVD goes to try and talk some sanity into Kane but Kane says he hates the fans. Rob hopes Kane doesn’t hate him when he wins the title. He leaves, and Kane says he does hate him.

Stacy Keibler/Scott Steiner vs. Chris Jericho/Test

Steiner and Jericho get things going (you want to save the Test vs. Steiner money match for later) with Chris being shoved down like he’s nothing. A belly to belly powerslam plants Jericho and Steiner starts in with the swearing. It’s off to Test, who JR thinks has no testicular fortitude. A suplex tosses Test but he’s right back with a clothesline to put Steiner on the floor.

The slow double teaming begins until Jericho misses a charge and crotches himself on the ropes. There’s no one for Steiner to tag though so Test decks him again and stops for some jumping jacks. Test crotches himself though and Stacy bounces the ropes up and down for some bad measure. Jericho comes in and shoves the referee down….but here’s Bischoff to say restart it as a No DQ match. A chair to the head puts Steiner down and Test forces Stacy to tag Steiner. That means a pumphandle powerslam to give Test the easy pin a few seconds later.

Rating: F. Do you get the idea yet? I didn’t know if the last few weeks had explained the concept so far but WWE seems rather fine with hammering it into your head over and over. JR is getting insufferable with his SOMEONE HELP THE HELPLESS WOMAN stuff too and I continue to question why what could be a good story is being wasted on Test and Scott Steiner. This just kept going and it never approached entertaining.

Rico vs. Maven

Rico grabs a quick pinch of the trunks to start and Lawler wants to know if Maven liked it. A cartwheel earns a nose rub from Miss Jackie but Rico needs to stop and pull his room key out of his tights. With Rico taking forever to bend over and get the key, Maven tries a sunset flip, earning himself a sit on the face. Rico kisses his way out of a headlock as the beating you over the head motif continues.

In case that’s not enough, we stop for some dancing with the referee. Maven finally blocks a middle rope ax handle and hits some clotheslines as JR tries to say the fans are stunned into silence. The middle rope bulldog gets two with Jackie putting the boot on the ropes. That and a shove off the top sets up the spinning kick to end Maven.

Rating: F-. Let me guess: Vince found this hilarious and the shots of Jackie split pants were enough to validate the character. This was HORRIBLE with every low level gay joke you can imagine in one match. It comes off as a case of “well, he did something similar once so let’s turn it way up this time”. It’s a total waste of Rico and that’s quite the shame.

Randy Orton vs. Tommy Dreamer

This is fallout from Orton beating up Mick Foley last week. Dreamer wastes no time in taking him to the floor for a fight, only to have Orton whip him into the steps. Back in and Orton gets two off a hard whip into the corner. Well he’s no Whipper Billy Watson. The always great dropkick gets two more but Dreamer grabs a Sky High of all things for the same. There’s the DDT but Flair puts the foot underneath the ropes. The tease of Flair vs. Dreamer (which sounds oddly fascinating) is enough for the RKO (I believe debuting the name) and the pin on Tommy.

Rating: D. They’re clearly trying to do something with Orton and that’s the right idea. He’s everything you could want out of a prospect and the good finisher makes things even better. It’s easy to see why he became the star he would become but he’s still needing the big win to get him over the hill.

Bischoff tells Van Dam that if Kane doesn’t come out, it’s on Rob’s head.

Post break, Bischoff sends Terri to get Kane’s thoughts. She doesn’t want to so Bischoff threatens another firing.

La Resistance vs. Hurricane/Spike Dudley

Non-title. Is Spike really an upgrade over fat Sgt. Slaughter? Hurricane starts with Dupree and let’s hit that French dance! Some armdrags have Rene in trouble and Hurricane does a little dance of his own. It’s off to Spike and we hit that BORING chant. A backdrop over the top to the floor calms them down but only gets two with JR being impressed by the kickout. Spike gets in a bulldog and the hot tag brings in Hurricane to no reaction. Everything breaks down and Spike hits a top rope double stomp for two. Grenier breaks up the chokeslam though and it’s the double spinebuster to end Spike.

Rating: D-. Can you blame the fans for not caring? The French guys aren’t exactly thrilling in the first place and it’s pretty hard to care if you see Spike Dudley coming out for a match like this. It wasn’t even any good as they had all of four minutes out there, which was hardly worth the time. You know, aside from filling out the show of course.

Terri can’t find Kane.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Rob Van Dam

HHH is defending and decks Van Dam before the bell. Some more right hands have Rob in trouble early on as HHH seems to be feeling the slow pace tonight. A monkey flip and some kicks to the head have JR way too excited. Really man we’re not even five minutes into this. Calm down already. Rob gets two off a dropkick and it’s time to head outside. There’s a baseball slide followed by a middle rope moonsault to put both guys down. Cue Flair as we take a break.

Back with Rob stomping away and kicking him in the head for good measure. A chop block lets HHH start in on the knee though with Flair wrapping it around the post for good measure. We hit the standard package of knee work, including HHH bringing back the Indian deathlock. You know, for reasons. Rob grabs the rope so we’ll try the Figure Four instead as HHH flashes all the way to 1984.

The hold is turned over and there’s just no reaction from the fans. Rob fights up with more kicks and a springboard crossbody gets two. A spinning kick hits HHH’s hands for two and there’s the split legged moonsault but Flair breaks it up again. The Five Star connects but this time Flair comes in with a belt shot for…..not the ending as Bischoff comes out AGAIN and restarts it as a No DQ match.

A quick Van Daminator on the floor has HHH down and Bischoff makes it hardcore for fun. Rob’s standing moonsault on the floor gets two until Orton comes in for the save (with the referee looking for him after every count). Van Dam chases HHH to the stage and gets two off Rolling Thunder. Flair comes back though and it’s a belt shot into a DDT on the stage to retain the title.

Rating: D. You know, for someone who prides himself on being a student of the game and all that jazz, HHH really doesn’t know much more than one way to get through a match. This was your usual twenty minutes of interference and HHH doing boring leg work that doesn’t get anyone’s attention until the obvious finish. At least they didn’t go with what I would have thought was the obvious Kane interference ending.

Post match Kane comes out, teases going after Van Dam, and chokeslams Bischoff off the stage to end the show.

Overall Rating: D–. This was a rough one as Austin really does do some positive things for the show. The biggest issue here is the middle section with the lame mixed tag and the really, really bad Rico match. That stuff isn’t funny and isn’t going to get anyone over so we’re stuck with seeing it over and over again. It’s not the worst show in the world as it was mainly a wrestling edition instead of a long talking segment but the bad stuff was absolutely awful.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event – November 24, 2017: A Thankful Change

Main Event
Date: November 23, 2017
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

Now aren’t you all thankful for this? We’re still in Houston because that’s where we have to be for every show for the better part of a week. This was a bit delayed due to the holidays and I was really missing it. Where else am I going to get Curt Hawkins losing another match and a cruiserweight match? Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Brian Kendrick vs. Gran Metalik

Kendrick grabs a headlock to start but gets taken outside with a springboard armdrag. Of course that means a suicide dive, followed by a springboard splash for two. Another dive misses though and Kendrick sends him ribs first into the apron to take over. We hit the chinlock for a few seconds before Metalik rolls him up for two more. A rope walk elbow drop gets the same and the Captain’s Hook is reversed into the Metalik Driver for the pin at 5:42.

Rating: C-. Completely paint by numbers cruiserweight match here, meaning it wasn’t all that bad. That being said, I do get a chuckle out of the almost certainty that the faces will always win these matches. Kendrick is miles ahead of Metalik most of the time but you put him on Main Event and he loses clean. It’s kind of amazing really.

Stills of Sunday’s main event.

From Raw.

Here’s a happy, dancing Stephanie to open things up. Graves: “At least she’s humble too.” She recaps the siege and says Kurt Angle’s job as GM is secure. With that, she brings out the man who lead the team to their win last night: HHH! Before HHH can say anything though, here’s a livid Kurt Angle to interrupt. He’s not talking as the General Manager but the man who can beat HHH up. Stephanie gets all serious and reminds HHH that he’s talking to the COO.

The staredown continues and here’s Jason Jordan to interrupt as well. Booker: “Oh come on.” Jordan gets in HHH’s face but Angle holds him back. Jason wants to face HHH tonight but Stephanie warns Jordan that he’d get killed in a match like this. Stephanie: “HHH isn’t afraid of anyone in that locker room.” This of course brings out Braun Strowman to get right in HHH’s face as well. HHH stares him down but backs off and leaves. Stephanie makes Jordan vs. Strowman for later. She didn’t cut Braun’s balls off here and at least they kept this relatively short, even if Stephanie didn’t need to be out there.

From later in the show.

Jason Jordan vs. Braun Strowman

Jordan tries to go with the wrestling stuff to start but gets caught without too much effort. He manages to lift Strowman off his feet but Strowman takes him down and tosses him outside. Jordan’s knee is banged up again…and here’s Kane to go after Strowman for the DQ at 1:44.

Kane destroys him with a chair and crushed Strowman’s throat with it. Strowman can’t breathe but walks off under his own power.

From Raw again.

Alicia Fox vs. Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Mickie James

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a title shot at some point. Joined in progress with Fox running Bayley over but getting caught in the Bank Statement. Bayley makes the save….and PAIGE IS BACK. She says she’s not here to interrupt (Then what was she doing???) but she’s not alone. Cue Sonya DeVille and Mandy Rose from NXT to interrupt and jump Bayley, drawing the no contest at around six minutes. There was barely two minutes of action though so no rating, but this was a heck of a debut and a MUCH needed face lift for the division.

The villains clean house with ease as Fox bails.

Post break Paige introduces us to her new friends. Alexa Bliss comes up, says a nervous hello, and gets destroyed.

And from Smackdown.

Naomi is getting her makeup done when NXT’s Ruby Riot comes up. She’s with Liv Morgan and Sarah Logan, all of whom beat the heck out of Naomi. Becky Lynch comes in for the save and gets beaten down as well.

From later on Smackdown.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Natalya

Charlotte is defending after having won last week. Natalya jumps at her to start but gets elbowed in the jaw. That earns her a face first toss into the middle buckle and we take a break. Back with Natalya getting two off a Batista Bomb and grabbing the Sharpshooter. Charlotte makes the rope for the break but Natalya is right back on her with right hands. A whip into the corner lets Charlotte try the moonsault, only to land on the knees. The spear connects but here are Logan, Riot and Morgan to jump Natalya for the DQ at 6:43.

Rating: C+. They were rolling until the interference here with Natalya showing more fire than she has in a long time. Charlotte looked like she was in a fight and that’s not something you see from her too often. I can go for the trio interfering, though I would have liked to see Charlotte get the win first.

Charlotte gets beaten down as well as the trio poses.

Apollo Crews vs. Curt Hawkins

Hawkins bails to the ropes to start, only to come back in and eat a dropkick. Another dropkick actually sends Crews outside and it’s off to a chinlock back inside. Even Nigel is saying that’s not going to be enough to make this work. Instead Hawkins stomps away in the corner, followed by a Downward Spiral for two. Not that it matters as the enziguri and a Toss Powerbomb extend Hawkins’ losing streak at 3:45.

Rating: D. This is one of those standard things you just know you’re getting on this show, which really isn’t the most thrilling thing in the world. I’m not sure if they’re going anywhere with Hawkins’ losing streak but it wouldn’t surprise me to see him win a big match at some point on a complete fluke. I mean, it wouldn’t do anyone any good but why let that stop you?

From Smackdown again.

Here’s Styles for a chat, but first we see a post-match video from Paul Heyman, saying Styles is the best in-ring performer he’s ever seen. AJ wishes he could celebrate with all the fans but it didn’t go as well as he thought it would. He’d love to face Lesnar again though because in the sequel, Rocky wins.

That brings him to Jinder Mahal, who says he’s taking the title back tonight. AJ takes off the jacket and the belt, saying come get it. Mahal pops up on screen to say it’s his time instead of AJ’s. If Mahal had faces Brock, he would be hailed as the Beastmaster. AJ says bring it on because Mahal should be well rested after not doing anything on Sunday. Mahal will take his rematch at Clash of Champions. Cue the Singh Brothers from behind to jump AJ, who cleans house without any trouble.

And from Raw one more time.

Intercontinental Title: Roman Reigns vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and seems willing to take an early countout. That’s not cool with Reigns, who chases him to the floor and hits an uppercut to the jaw. A Batista Bomb gets two on the champ and we take an early break. Back with Reigns hitting his running clothesline, followed by a big boot to the jaw. Miz is smart enough to bail again and catches Reigns diving off the steps.

A DDT on the floor is nearly good enough for a countout but Reigns dives back in. We hit the chinlock for a good while until Miz hits a corner dropkick. Another is countered with a big boot, only to have Miz knock him down a few more times. It’s off to the YES Kicks until Reigns fights up without much effort. The Superman Punch is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale but Reigns slips out.

Miz sweeps the leg for two though and Reigns is favoring his knee. The Superman Punch knocks Miz out of the air for a VERY close two though as the fans are impressed with the kickout. The spear is loaded up but cue the Bar for a distraction, allowing the Skull Crushing Finale to connect….for two. Ambrose and Rollins run out to even things up, allowing Reigns to hit a spear for the pin and the title at 16:26.

Rating: B-. They were doing some good stuff out there and I like Reigns winning the title. Earlier on I mentioned people like Balor and Joe having nothing to do because they were bigger than the Intercontinental Title. They’re not bigger than Reigns though and that gives them a bigger target to go after. Good move here, even if it’s two to three years after Reigns should have won the thing in the first place.

Overall Rating: C-. Well that was certainly a packed show. I can go for this idea of putting both Raw and Smackdown clips into the same hour as it’s not like there’s a Raw monopoly on clips. There’s important stuff happening on Smackdown and there’s no reason to leave them out on a nothing recap show. I like this as the new direction and while the show wasn’t thrilling, it makes more sense now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – November 27, 2017: The Monster Among The Mayor

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 27, 2017
Location: Thompson-Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

We’re finally out of Houston and on the road to the Royal Rumble. The big story coming out of last week is Roman Reigns winning the Intercontinental Title for the first time and issuing an open challenge after the show went off the air. Other than that we have the continuing issues with Kurt Angle, HHH and Stephanie McMahon as we flash back about seventeen years. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Kane vs. Braun Strowman, including Kane injuring Strowman’s throat last week.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

Dean Ambrose is on his honeymoon so Rollins is on his own. It’s not like he has a buddy who happens to be Intercontinental Champion around or anything. Cesaro works on a wristlock to start but gets stomped down into the corner without much effort. Seth gets sent outside though and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro working on the ribs by dropping some knees for two. Seth’s high crossbody is countered into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and we hit a waistlock. Rollins tries an abdominal stretch of his own but gets hiptossed down without much effort. The Blockbuster works a bit better and Cesaro falls outside for a suicide dive.

Back from a second break with Rollins getting two off a Falcon Arrow. A poke to the eye sets up a small package for two on Seth and it’s off to the Sharpshooter. Rollins makes the rope though and gets two of his own off the low superkick. The wind-up knee is enough to end Cesaro at 18:23.

Rating: B. Nice long match here with Rollins getting a win to hopefully set up a title match next week. That being said, I have no idea how they’re supposed to keep doing these one on one matches. There really should be a better way to set up a title match than having the singles wrestlers fight over and over again, but that might mean building up more teams.

Post match Seth says the Shield isn’t going their separate ways because it’s time to invoke the rematch for the Tag Team Titles.

We look at the end of last week’s 205 Live with the Zo Train losing but beating down the good guys anyway.

Kurt Angle is with the four good cruiserweights and says it’s time to determine who gets the shot. Tonight there’s going to be a four way and next week there’s going to be another one. The winners of those matches will face off for the next title shot.

Titus O’Neil vs. Samoa Joe

Titus charge at him in the corner but gets headbutted away without much effort. An early Koquina Clutch is broken up and it turns into a chop off. A kick to the shoulder gives Titus two but a right hand takes him down. The Clutch makes Titus tap at 2:30.

Apollo Crews tries to go after Joe and gets choked out too. I have no idea why this is what Samoa Joe is stuck doing.

We recap Paige and company invading last week.

Paige/Mandy Rose/Sonya DeVille vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks/Mickie James

Bray Wyatt is here. Post break he’s in the ring for a chat. Bray talks about never having a childhood. He never got to do all the usual things that children do. Your entire world exists inside the confines of a cardboard box. They tell you what to do and who to love. It’s pathetic really, just like everyone here. Their suffering brings him joy and he can see them for who they truly are. Bray says we’re all dead and starts cackling.

Bray Wyatt vs. Matt Hardy

Joined in progress with Bray running Matt over without much effort. The backsplash gets two but Matt drops him without too much effort. The middle rope elbow doesn’t work so Matt settles for the Side Effect for two. Matt’s moonsault misses and Bray spider walks up, followed by Sister Abigail to give Bray the pin at 3:30.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here, though that’s usually the case with Matt’s matches anymore. They’re not very interesting and the big story with him tends to be when is Jeff getting back. I’d love it if this losing streak started moving him towards the Broken Matt character, as I can’t imagine WWE not getting their hands on it eventually.

Post match Matt sits in the corner and starts screaming while doing the DELETE motion. Cole: “Are we witnessing the beginning of a Matt Hardy…..breakdown?”

We look at Strowman getting hurt last week.

Jason Jordan wants to face Strowman again this week but since Braun is hurt, he’ll face Kane instead.

Rich Swann vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Ariya Daivari vs. Noam Dar

One fall to a finish and winner goes on to a one on one #1 contenders match in two weeks. It’s a brawl to start with Tozawa fighting off a double teaming but Swann flips over him. They trade some rollups for two each until the villains take him outside. Swann hits a big flip dive onto all of them with his knee hitting Tozawa square in the face. He seems ok though as Swann heads back inside for Rolling Thunder, only to be caught by Daivari’s spinebuster.

Tozawa comes back in and is double whipped into the corner. A double suplex drops Swann on the floor and we take a break. Back with Swann still on the floor as Tozawa hits the standing backsplash on Daivari. The top rope version is broken up but Swann comes back in for the Tower of Doom. Dar breaks up the Phoenix splash but Tozawa takes him out with a dive.

Daivari’s frog splash gets two on Swann, only to have Tozawa catch him with a Shining Wizard. The top rope backsplash crushes Daivari with Dar sending Tozawa into the post. Dar’s running kick to the head drops Tozawa so Swann pulls Tozawa outside. A regular kick to the head sets up the Phoenix splash to give Swann the pin and the spot in the #1 contenders match at 12:37.

Rating: C+. This was longer than it needed to be but the right guy won. Nothing here felt like anything you couldn’t see on a regular episode of 205 Live, which is a big part of the problem. Hopefully this sets up Swann vs. Cedric Alexander for the title shot with Cedric eventually getting the win, as he’s long overdue for a run as champion.

Here’s Elias for his Intercontinental Title shot but first, a song about how sad the Miztourage is to not have their leader around. Dallas and Axel join in on harmonica and do give quite a performance. Elias offers them some praise but the fans cut him off with a WE WANT ROMAN chant. That’s cut off by a NO WE DON’T chant and we’re FINALLY ready to go.

Intercontinental Title: Roman Reigns vs. Elias

Asuka vs. Dana Brooke

Brooke says she’ll be all over Asuka at the bell. A cross armbreaker makes Dana tap at five seconds.

Post match Absolution comes out and surrounds the ring, only to let Asuka leave in peace.

Jason Jordan vs. Kane

Post match Kane stays on the knee until Finn Balor comes out for the save. They stare each other down and we take a break.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Overall Rating: C+. The good, long matches worked but I have no idea what that ending was supposed to be. So Jordan is trying to be all gutsy and get over his knee injury, Balor is dealing with Kane (and getting destroyed by him over and over) and Kane vs. Strowman is over who the real monster is. Ignoring the fact that Kane hasn’t been viewed as much of a monster in at least ten years and WHY IS THIS THE TOP STORY OF THE SHOW??? Like, is this supposed to set up Kane vs. Strowman, after Strowman has beaten Kane down multiple times now? That’s their big draw?

Other than that, the show actually wasn’t half bad with Asuka’s win being a high point. Sometimes there’s no need to have the match be anything other than a glorified joke and that’s what we had there. Asuka is just better than Brooke and there was no need to watch it go for three minutes to prove such a thing. As mentioned, the wrestling was good but the booking of the last thirty minutes or so….not so much. Have Reigns vs. Elias and the Samoa Joe attack close the show and it’s far, far better. Still good though.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Cesaro – Wind-up knee

Samoa Joe b. Titus O’Neil – Koquina Clutch

Bray Wyatt b. Matt Hardy – Sister Abigail

Rich Swann b. Ariya Daivari, Akira Tozawa and Noam Dar – Phoenix splash to Dar

Roman Reigns b. Elias – Spear

Asuka b. Dana Brooke – Cross armbreaker

Kane b. Jason Jordan via countout

Finn Balor b. Kane via DQ when Kane used a chair

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – June 23, 2003: I Hope The Rating Was Worth It

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 23, 2003
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 14,451
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re in the World’s Most Famous Arena for one of the weaker stretches in WWE history. However, there’s a heck of a main event tonight as HHH defends the World Title against Kane in a champion vs. mask match. That’s an area that we’ve touched on over the years with Kane but the idea of HHH actually losing the title doesn’t seem likely anytime soon. Something’s got to give so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Scott Steiner/Booker T. vs. Test/Christian

Two feuds in one is often a good way to go. Christian takes Booker into the corner for some right hands before the much taller Canadian gets to do the same. Test mocks Steiner’s pushups and the delay allows Booker to hit the spinning kick to the face. The hot tag brings in Steiner to toss people around, including sending Christian out to the floor. Test grabs Stacy though, earning himself a slap. He shoves Steiner into her though and, since WWE Divas have the weakest ankles ever, Stacy twists her ankle. Booker and Christian take each other out, allowing Test to boot Steiner in the face for the pin.

Rating: D. This Test vs. Steiner feud is getting worse and worse every single week. Test beating up Mae Young last week helped him a little, though his complete lack of talking skills and charisma hold him back a lot. Booker and Christian were glorified window dressing here, which shouldn’t be the case for the Intercontinental Title feud.

Kane looks around stoically as we look at his debut in 1997.

Teddy Long and Christopher Nowinski come out to talk about how unfairly Chris has been treated. He’s been discriminated against due to his intelligence, which is the only reason he didn’t win Tough Enough. It’s thuggin and buggin time.

Maven vs. Christopher Nowinski

Maven reverses a suplex into a rollup and wins in thirty seconds with a rollup.

Evolution arrived earlier.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Chris Jericho ripping on the New York fans. He wants to talk about Steve Austin interrupting Lance Storm’s match last week to call him boring. Storm is the guest tonight and he has a prepared statement. No one enjoys a good laugh more than he does but Austin crossed a line last week. His in-ring abilities should be more than enough to entertain people and if you want bells and whistles, go to the circus. Therefore, please stop chanting BORING.

At the end of the statement though, here are some movers to take away the set. Austin comes up on screen to say they’re boring Madison Square Garden to death. Instead of reading prepared statements and Jericho annoying him in general, let’s have a tag team match right now.

Chris Jericho/Lance Storm vs. Dudley Boyz

The Canadians jump them during the entrances until the Dudleys run Storm over and toss him outside. We settle down to Bubba hammering away until Jericho trips him from the floor. The running crotch attack to the back connects and a belly to back suplex makes it even worse. Storm’s boring leg lariat sets up a chinlock before it’s back to Jericho for a quickly broken Walls.

It’s another chinlock and there go those chants again. Storm switches to a sleeper and Lawler can’t help but make boring jokes. Bubba gets out with a suplex and makes the hot tag to D-Von. Everything breaks down with a neckbreaker to both Canadians. Jericho gets flapjacked and What’s Up hits Storm but the table request takes too long. It’s Storm coming back in with the springboard clothesline for two on D-Von, only to have the 3D put Storm away in short order.

Rating: B-. They were moving out there, but the boring stuff got annoying in a hurry. I kind of get what they’re going for there but at the same time it’s hardly the most logical move in the world to get someone over. Also, Storm is now a combination of boring and a loser. Maybe it’s a long term project but my goodness it’s taking a questionable road to get there.

We look back at Evolution stealing Kane’s mask five months ago.

Randy Orton and Ric Flair mock Mick Foley’s Tietam Brown in the traditional not so subtle plug. Their goal for tonight is to have HHH retain the title.

Here are La Resistance to sing the French National Anthem. This rendition makes me long for the days of Nikolai Volkoff though as singing certainly isn’t their strong point, which I think is kind of the point. However, it’s about to get worse.

La Resistance vs. Sgt Slaughter/Hurricane

Non-title. Sarge is looking huge but the fans definitely respond to him. Hurricane dives off the top onto Grenier, leaving Slaughter to knock Dupree around. We hit the cobra clutch for a second until Dupree makes a rope. Grenier uses the distraction to get in a belt shot for the fast pin. Hurricane was never in the match.

We look at Austin trying to fire Kane up a few weeks ago. This is treated as one of Kane’s memory (complete with the screen getting all wavy as it ends), meaning we now have a camera in his head. Somehow this isn’t quite the surprise.

Here’s Austin for an announcement: Wrestlemania XX is coming to Madison Square Garden. As for tonight though, he’d like to have Mick Foley come out here right now. He knows Foley is going out on a book tour and yes he’d like an autographed copy. Before he goes though, Austin has a little gift. After Foley steps away to avoid a Stunner, Austin brings out some people who used to wrestle in ECW with a framed Hardcore Title. He’s not done though as we get a music video about Foley with quite the set of highlights. Foley: “I almost forgot how good I was!”

Before he can go anywhere else though, here’s Vince McMahon to interrupt. Vince brings up Foley saying he would never be back here again yet here he is. That’s not cool with Vince from a personal standpoint but from a professional standpoint, it’s something else. Therefore, Vince has two words for Foley: thank you.

Foley shakes his hand but wants a hug, much to Vince’s annoyance. He used to mock wrestlers for crying during their great moments but that’s the case right now. We get the required cheap pop and Al Snow joke, Foley talks about the Snuka vs. Muraco match where he knew what he wanted to do for the rest of his life. In the words of Dorothy Gale, there’s no place like home, so he hopes he’ll be welcome back in a WWE ring at some point again. One last thing: in the words of Frosty the Snowman (noted hardcore philosopher), “I’ll say goodbye, but don’t you cry. I’ll be back again someday.”

It’s kind of random to have Foley show up less than a month ago and then have a big goodbye ceremony but this felt like a big way to make up for the way he left before. Foley deserves a big sendoff like this and I’m glad to see it be such a nice moment. At least he went out on good terms for once, which isn’t always the case.

Shawn Michaels/Kevin Nash vs. Ric Flair/Randy Orton

Shawn chops away at Flair to start so it’s off to Orton to trade right hands. Nash gets the side slam on Orton, followed by the framed elbows to Flair in the corner. With Evolution on the floor, Shawn hits a slingshot corkscrew dive to take them out and we go to a break after a rather pedestrian first part.

Back with Shawn getting stomped down by Orton and starting in on the arm. Flair comes in for an armbar of his own, which looks so out of place from him. Even more armbarring from Orton goes nowhere as I’m longing for more Slaughter to energize this tag match. A collision allows for the hot tag to Nash to clean a few rooms of the house.

Flair saves Orton from the Jackknife and it’s a double clothesline to put Evolution down. That’s enough from Nash so it’s back to the winded Shawn as they’ve managed to bore New York City. Sweet Chin Music is blocked but Orton is sent outside. The top rope elbow hits Flair and Sweet Chin Music is good for the easy pin.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that supposed to be? No one in the match looked interested in being there and it was eight minutes of lame arm work. Nash barely did anything and Orton was just there for the sake of being there. In other words, this might as well have been Shawn vs. Flair II, though I’m not sure how much good it was going to be. I have no idea what was wrong here as they’re definitely capable of better.

Video of Kane agreeing to the match last week.

The fans think Kane will win the title 56% to 44%, which surprises JR.

Foley signed a book to Vince but Evolution comes in with Foley getting beaten down at Orton’s hands. A bottle to the head cuts Foley off and Orton kicks him down the stairs. Vince sees him down and says he needs a janitor to get Foley up.

Here are Teddy Long and Rodney Mack for another FIVE MINUTE WHITE BOY CHALLENGE!

Goldberg vs. Rodney Mack

Knees to the ribs (no spear) and the Jackhammer end Mack faster than Maven beat Nowinski. Well that woke them up.

Rob Van Dam gives Kane a pep talk and Kane breaks a mirror he’s been looking into all night.

We get a Wrestlemania Recall, which isn’t from New York City. It is however of Stephanie, with HHH Pedigreeing her at XVIII.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kane

Kane is challenging and it’s mask vs. title. They start fast with HHH being sent into the corner and getting caught in a choke. There’s no slam quite yet though so Kane takes him outside and sends him into the steps instead. Flair gets in the ring for a distraction though and HHH scores with a chair to the head.

Back from a break with HHH scoring with a spinebuster before botching a DDT. Thankfully Kane sits straight up so HHH pulls him down by the hair (called a neckbreaker) for the same level of effectiveness. A powerslam gives Kane two and the top rope clothesline connects….only to bump the ref. He’s not bumped well enough though so Kane runs him over for good measure.

Flair tries to bring in the belt to no avail as Kane knocks HHH silly for two instead from a second referee. HHH’s low blow into the Pedigree gets two and Kane sends HHH into Flair. The chokeslam is loaded up but Orton comes in with a low blow and the RKO. The second Pedigree retains the title.

Rating: D. So this was basically a pay per view main event match with HHH going with the exact same style he’s used for about nine months now. I remember being stunned that they actually had Kane lose his mask but it’s not like he had anything else going on at the moment. Of course this could have been something they actually took time to set up but why do that when you can rush it in a week? For MSG? Eh, fair enough, though there could have been a bigger moment for such a big deal.

Post match Eric Bischoff comes out to say Kane has to unmask right now. He reaches for the chin strap but HHH hits him from behind with the belt. Van Dam comes in to save Kane (WHERE WAS HE FIVE MINUTES AGO???) and it’s a chokeslam to Orton, followed by the Five Star. Kane loads up the ring post pyro but stops and eventually unmasks. Most of his hair comes off with it, revealing a heavily make-uped face that I guess was supposed to be his horrible burns. Kane chokeslams a stunned Van Dam to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Other than the rather good match designed to make Lance Storm seem boring and the genuinely great Foley ceremony, there wasn’t much on this show of value. Above all though, they came up with an angle where Kane gets unmasked and blew it off in the span of a week. I get the idea of popping a rating but what about popping a pay per view buy rate instead? Would Kane vs. HHH, mask vs. title, inside the Cell have been a worse idea than HHH vs. Nash? Anyway, this had a few good parts but they’re bogged down by some rather bad thinking.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – June 16, 2003: The Fake One Is Better

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 16, 2003
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past Bad Blood and thank goodness for that. Hopefully it means we’re done with Kevin Nash as a main event star though stranger things have happened. Since Smackdown will have its own brand exclusive show in September, we’re on the road to Summerslam in just over two months. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Mick Foley (who promised to go back to his boring life after last night) to open things up and, shockingly enough, he’s carrying a book. Foley thanks the fans for their support and talks about returning to his normal life on June 16, which happens to be today. However, he wanted one more chance to be inside a WWE ring, though he’ll be here next week in Madison Square Garden as well. We hit the cheap plug for Tietam Brown (which I have on my bookshelf) before Foley talks about putting the Mandible Claw on HHH last night.

That made him remember who he is….but here’s Evolution, now with music (albeit not their best known song). Orton calls Foley a loser and puts over his teammates’ accomplishments from last night. As for tonight though, it’s time for Evolution to find a fourth member and Foley could be up for that spot. Foley isn’t interested in being a Four Horseman wannabe and hanging out with a sixteen year old with no idea what to do with all this testosterone. He rips into Orton for all those injuries so early in his career because he’s never shown the heart that you need to be a star in this business.

Orton says these people are here to see him because he doesn’t have to do things the way Foley did. Randy shows off the physique but Foley tells him to take his best shot. Foley gets physical for a bit but the numbers eventually get the better of him. Of all people, Maven and Al Snow run in for the save. Thankfully I don’t think this is setting up a six man tag but it was a heck of a segment with Foley selling emotion and planting some seeds for a match with Orton later on.

Eric Bischoff yells at Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young, threatening to knock the latter’s dentures out. Mae is going to have a match tonight as punishment for the pie incident last night.

Gail Kim is coming.

Dudley Boyz/Ivory vs. Rodney Mack/Jazz/Christopher Nowinski

The good ones clear the ring to start with Bubba throwing Ivory over the top onto Jazz. Bubba has to fight out of the corner but an elbow hits Nowinski’s mask and Mack takes over. The Bubba Bomb cuts Nowinski off though and everything breaks down in a hurry. Jazz gets shoved down and there’s a double flapjack to Nowinski. Ivory goes up top to play D-Von in What’s Up and Nowinski eats 3D. A rollup gives Ivory another pin on Jazz.

Rating: D+. How many times does Ivory get to pin Jazz before we get Jazz beating her in the title match because even WWE isn’t stupid enough to put the title on Ivory? I really could go for getting that over with and getting on to some fresh talent. Gail Kim would help a lot, assuming they don’t just add her to the rotating cast of uninteresting characters.

You can vote on who will be added to Evolution. Test is an option.

Kane and Rob Van Dam have a rematch for the Tag Team Titles but Kane isn’t thrilled. See, it was Rob’s fault last week so if they lose tonight, they’re done as a team.

Music video on Bad Blood.

Foley, Maven and Snow (in a Hurricane shirt) are annoyed at Evolution. Maven has Orton tonight and Foley will be out there with him.

Evolution is watching the next match to scout talent.

Garrison Cade vs. Lance Storm

What did I do to deserve this? Also, they couldn’t call him, I don’t know, George Cade? Or ANYTHING but Garrison? Maybe Mackey Cade? Before the match, Austin comes out and says BORING over and over while laying down on the stage with a pillow and blanket. He’s tried watching the grass grow and watched the paint dry but maybe this could put him to sleep. The camera stays on Austin as he hammers away, only to get dropkicked by Cade. Austin leads the BORING chants and Lance comes back with a leg lariat for two.

We hit an armbar as Austin is starting to snore. He’s having a dream where Storm is wrestling….which means it’s a nightmare. Now he’s waking up and he realizes it’s not a dream. He says everyone is asleep and the distraction lets Cade grab a rollup for the fast pin. Someone is going to have to explain this Austin making fun of/ripping on the wrestlers thing to me as we had Kane a few weeks back and now this. How does this help anyone? I mean, Austin doesn’t exactly get anything out of it either but it’s twice now that he’s treated another wrestler like garbage. It’s not like they have the talent to spare at the moment either.

Chris Jericho/Christian vs. Goldberg/Booker T.

Booker goes after the Canadians before Goldberg comes out but thankfully he doesn’t waste time with the full entrance. I’d have gotten a good laugh if he had though but thankfully sanity prevailed. Jericho is sent outside in a heap and we take a break before the bell. We’re joined in progress with Jericho bailing out to avoid the legal Goldberg. A thumb to Goldberg’s eye slows him down but he’s right back with a neckbreaker.

Goldberg clotheslines both of them as this is basically dominance whenever Goldberg is in. Booker comes in for a kick to the face and some chops against the ropes. Some cheap shots from the apron has Booker in trouble though as Evolution’s scouting continues. Things slow down with a chinlock but the twisting rollup out of the corner gets….countered into a failed Walls attempt. Booker kicks him away and makes the tag to Goldberg, which really doesn’t get much of a reaction.

A very delayed gorilla press powerslam gets the fans back but Christian breaks it up at two. Christian saves Jericho from the spear so it’s back to Booker as everything seems ready to break down but doesn’t quite get there. Instead Booker has to dropkick Christian out of the air, only to get caught with the Lionsault. Now the spear connects, only to bang up Goldberg’s bad shoulder. Christian brings in the Intercontinental Title, which Booker takes away and uses to knock him cold for the pin.

Rating: B-. Nice main event style tag match here, which was a lot more than I was expecting. Goldberg looked like a killing machine here and Booker looked fine, though it’s not the best use of your Intercontinental Champion. Would it have been the worst thing in the world to have Jericho lose here? Or to have Goldberg do what the fans want to see him do and just break a few people? Good match though.

Long recap of the pie eating segment from last night.

Mae Young vs. Test

An angry Bischoff is out for ring announcing. And no match of course as Austin comes out to make Scott Steiner guest referee (JR: “FINALLY SOME FAIRNESS HERE!” No JR, no that’s still not fairness.), only to have Test give Mae a pumphandle slam before Steiner can come out to even things up. I still never need to see the pie thing again and Moolah/Mae being used for anything other than bad comedy would be in the same category.

Rico is in the back for his match and now he’s even more over the top, with moisturizer and sparkle glitter (his words) along with Miss Jackie (Gayda), which is quite the upgrade as I was always a fan.

After that debut (complete with “IT’S RAINING RICO!”), let’s look at Mae being destroyed again.

Austin wants to see Van Dam and Kane.

Rico vs. Spike Dudley

Rico takes him down with a few kicks and a neckbreaker gets two. Some stomps in the corner have Spike in more trouble as the announcers talk about anything other than this new gimmick. We hit a seated full nelson to keep Spike in trouble, followed by a middle rope ax handle for more of the same. The BORING chants begin (Who could have guessed that would have caught on from earlier?) as JR and King try to figure out if Rico and Jackie are dating. Spike is put on top but bites Rico’s head, setting up a double stomp to the ribs. Jackie offers a distraction though and Rico finishes with a spinning kick.

Rating: D-. Yeah this isn’t the biggest surprise but this gimmick is dead in the water. It’s WWE’s version of being funny when Rico has the potential to be a heck of a star on his own. But instead we’ll go with the stupid jokes because that’s what got Rico over so hard in the first place. Bad match and a bad sign for Rico as well.

Austin yells at Van Dam and Kane, saying DO IT FOR AMERICA.

Maven vs. Randy Orton

Foley and Flair are at ringside. Orton easily takes him down to start as JR thinks Randy could be a star with a slight attitude adjustment. That’s more accurate than he could have known. Maven gets in a dropkick to put Orton on the floor but the hanging DDT gives Orton two. A hard whip into the corner has Maven in more trouble and a northern lights suplex gets two.

Maven fights out of a chinlock as Lawler accuses Foley of ripping him off for some illustrations in a book. JR completely ignores that to talk about Van Dam and Kane, making me think there’s a coverup. Orton’s dropkick gets two but Maven avoids a charge in the corner. A middle rope bulldog gives Maven two as Foley gives Flair Mr. Socko. Maven gets two more off a high crossbody but the RKO (so weird to have it get no reaction) puts him away.

Rating: D. Not terrible and better than the boss yelling about a match being boring but there’s a reason that Maven wasn’t around very often. It’s understandable when you consider he was only a few years into the business at this point but he never really got much better. You can see Orton’s potential shining here though and a lot of his signature stuff is starting to pick up.

Foley tries to start a post match fight but the villains run.

Test, Jericho and Kane win the fan vote about who will be in Evolution.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Kane/Rob Van Dam

La Resistance is defending after winning the titles last night. Kane throws Rene Dupree around to start and choke drops Sylvan Grenier for a bonus. The champs are sent outside and Rob hits a running dive (which seemed like it was supposed to include a flip) to take them both down again.

Back from a break with Van Dam in trouble and Rene grabbing a chinlock. JR stays on his rants against France, including the classic “if you don’t like America, get out”. Grenier comes in for a bow and arrow hold until Rob fights up for the hot tag off to Kane. The top rope clothesline misses though, which Lawler thinks is impressive. Kane chokes Grenier in the air for a top rope kick to the face in a spot that was cooler than I thought it would have been.

Things settle back down with Van Dam scoring two off a dropkick. Rene is back in with a Death Valley Driver but now the top rope clothesline connects. A thumb to the eye cuts Kane off though and the double spinebuster plants him on the floor. Back in and the double spinebuster is countered with a double DDT (didn’t look good and wasn’t clear until the champs stayed down) for two. Rob goes up but gets shoved onto Kane, who chairs Rene in the head for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Not terrible but WAY too long as it felt like it should have ended five minutes earlier. Kane snapping again is interesting, though I could have gone for more of Kane and Van Dam as a team. At least we have some new champs who have proven they can beat the old champs, though it’s still not the most thrilling stuff in the world.

Post match Kane destroys La Resistance with chair shots and a chokeslam….so here’s HHH. The champ says he respects Kane, unlike Van Dam. Right here tonight, HHH is offering Kane a spot in Evolution. As HHH gives his sales pitch, here’s Austin to interrupt. HHH and Austin bicker a bit until Austin gives Kane a title shot next week in Madison Square Garden. This brings out Bischoff to say if Kane loses, he loses the mask. Kane chokeslams HHH to accept the match.

Overall Rating: D. You know it really is amazing how much easier this was to sit through without having to deal with Kevin Nash. Kane isn’t a great opponent but at least he can move around and the fans might buy him as a threat to win the title. Unfortunately there’s not much else to cheer for on this show, save for the good tag match in the middle. When you have Austin yelling about how boring Storm is, you can only get the show so far. Evolution is starting to have some potential though, which is a good sign as it’s likely going to be the biggest story on the show for a very long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – November 13, 2017: I Can Survive Stephanie

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 13, 2017
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

It’s the go home Raw for Survivor Series but there’s a good chance we’ll be seeing some Smackdown names tonight and some Raw names tomorrow. The big stories tonight though are the returns of Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar, the former of the two from a bad illness. You can pretty much guess how tonight is going to go but that’s not the worst thing in the world. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of the Raw vs. Smackdown feud. It’s been good but I never need to see that Under Siege thing again.

Here’s Stephanie McMahon to open things up and it’s full on heel mode this week. She talks about having huge decisions to make that we can’t fathom and needing help for those moments. This includes a General Manager like Kurt Angle, who comes out to address last week’s incident. Angle says there was a raid last week but Stephanie wants to know how the Smackdown roster got into the building.

Kurt doesn’t know and we’re off to the races with Stephanie cutting off his balls. She recaps every single thing in that condescending voice of hers and rips on Angle for every decision on the road to Survivor Series. Stephanie asks why Angle put Jason Jordan in the spot because John Cena was available but went to Raw. Angle says he’s going to start at Survivor Series and break Shane McMahon’s ankle, though Stephanie doesn’t think he can do that anymore. She’s about to fire him when Shield comes out.

They get a nice reaction but Stephanie cuts the fans off to tell them to cheer or boo. Ambrose endorses Angle for his work at TLC and gets annoyed at the YOU STILL GOT IT chant. Stephanie rips on Shield for losing the Tag Team Titles (to another Raw team but that doesn’t seem to bother her) and asks where Roman has been. Reigns asks where Stephanie has been for six or seven months (it’s been like three weeks) after her husband put her through a table at Wrestlemania. Shield wants to fight New Day on Sunday and will take care of business if New Day accepts.

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Dana Brooke vs. Mickie James vs. Bayley

The other team members are on the floor and Mickie gets sent outside to start. Back in and Dana stacks them up in the corner for a handspring elbow. Bayley gets knocked off the apron and we take a break. Back with Bayley suplexing both of them and sending Dana outside for a Stunner over the ropes. Mickie hits a good looking flapjack into a nipup before dropping Bayley with a neckbreaker. A double faceplant puts Dana on the floor…..where she hits Asuka for some reason. That earns Dana a knockout kick to the head, leaving Bayley to hit the Bayley to Belly for the pin on Mickie at 7:31.

Rating: D+. Asuka looked the best out of all of the people involved with the match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Bayley winning was the right call and makes the most sense, though I could have gone with her losing and having to figure out where she had to go from there. Still though, it makes sense.

Enzo Amore/Drew Gulak vs. Kalisto/Akira Tozawa

Before the match, Enzo goes on an inane rant about Kalisto having short pockets and I have no idea what he’s talking about (as usual). Gulak and Tozawa start things off and some early heel double teaming fails. Kalisto springboards in with a dropkick and we take a break. Back with Gulak cranking on Tozawa’s neck until Tozawa kicks him down. Diving tags bring in Enzo and Kalisto with the masked one hitting a springboard crossbody. A missile dropkick drops Gulak and there are the back to back dives. Kalisto dives onto Gulak but the Jordunzo ends Tozawa at 7:47.

Rating: C-. At least it had some good looking dives. This was every lame Enzo match you’ve seen but thankfully there were some other people around to help take up the slack. Enzo vs. Kalisto hasn’t been interesting since Enzo got the title back but that’s what we’re stuck with for reasons of “well, we can’t just cancel 205 Live”.

We look at the opening sequence.

Team Raw is in the back with Angle making Finn Balor/Samoa Joe vs. Anderson and Gallows to make sure they can work together. Jordan on the other hand gets to face Bray Wyatt to prove that he’s not a handpicked choice in over his head. Braun Strowman wants Kane, which Angle grants.

It’s time for MizTV with the Miztourage in the background. Miz talks about Baron Corbin being his presumed opponent at Survivor Series, assuming Corbin doesn’t choke like he usually does. Corbin couldn’t even make it onto last week’s Smackdown but Miz always capitalizes on his chances.

Like tonight, when he faces the Shield along with his guests tonight: the Bar. The new champs come out and, after congratulating themselves on their win, say they’re real champions unlike the Usos. They’re going to jail break the Uso Penitentiary and show their superiority. Miz promises to take care of the Shield tonight because this is their moment.

We look back at Under Siege again.

New Day has accepted Shield’s challenge.

Jason Jordan vs. Bray Wyatt

Jordan isn’t scared and scores with an early dropkick before driving Bray into the corner. He actually scores with a belly to belly but Bray takes him outside and whips him into the barricade. Bray: “You don’t know what you’re messing with kiddo.” Back from a break with Bray working on the knee but stopping for a backsplash. The Rock Bottom out of the corner has the fans all peppy but they’re calmed down with Jordan getting in a right hand. Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup to give Jordan the pin at 7:16.

Rating: D+. Well that was flat. Jordan had nothing after the break and then wins with a simple rollup. I’ve liked Jordan’s push for the most part but this felt like a BIG stretch and too much at once. Bray is a former World Champion and Jordan casually pinned him like it was nothing. Jordan feels way out of place on that team and it would be nice to have him replaced, though I’m not sure if it would make sense.

Post match Bray beats the heck out of Jordan to a strong reaction. The bad knee is wrapped around the post and we get a THANK YOU WYATT chant. Jordan can’t put any weight on the leg and needs help getting out.

Post break Jordan is getting his knee looked at with Angle thinking of taking him out of Sunday’s match. Jordan begs to stay in but Angle doesn’t say anything.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman to address AJ Styles. Heyman gets to the point: if the fans want to see Lesnar beat up Styles, it happens on Sunday. He’s seen Lesnar thrown into the ring with stronger opponents than he’s ever seen before, all of the people who could destroy most humans.

Now it’s AJ Styles, who lives up to the concept of speed kills. Heyman stops to yell at the crowd before saying Styles is the most talented in-ring performer of this generation. Some people might think that’s Finn Balor but Heyman will let people figure that out. Heyman goes over all the reasons that AJ could challenge Styles, but thinks a good old boy from Georgia isn’t going to survive against a Georgia Bulldog eating carnivore. Lesnar is the #1 champion in WWE, then now and forever.

If you want to see a Rocky movie come to live, Heyman gives you AJ Styles. Heyman lists off all the big names that AJ has defeated but this ain’t no freaking Rocky movie. AJ can’t survive the onslaught of the conqueror and he can’t survive the F5. Heyman looks forward to seeing AJ Styles in person on Sunday but this ends with Brock standing tall. Brock actually shakes some kids’ hands on the way out for a weird visual. Paul was all kinds of fired up here and it was great stuff.

Shield vs. Miz/The Bar

Rollins and Cesaro hit the mat to start and it’s an early standoff. A dropkick puts Cesaro down and of course he immediately checks his teeth. Dean comes in for some hard chops in the corner but Sheamus cuts him off with some hard shots of his own. Everything breaks down with Shield clearing the ring, including some double dives to the Bar. Miz and company bail into the crowd and we take a break.

Back with Rollins being thrown outside but Dean is right there to clothesline Cesaro. Sheamus dives into a superkick though and it’s a double knockdown. The hot tag brings in Reigns for his usual clotheslines as everything breaks down. Cesaro’s big uppercut gets two but Reigns is right back with the Superman Punch.

The spear is blocked with another uppercut though and it’s a blind tag to Miz. Reigns doesn’t notice and gets rolled up with a handful of tights for two. Rollins comes back in with the springboard knee, followed by Dirty Deeds to Sheamus. Miz is left all alone and there’s a spear, followed by the TripleBomb for the pin at 15:06.

Rating: C+. Normally I would get annoyed at the champions losing like this but what are you supposed to do when you’re against the Shield? It’s not like someone just pinned Miz clean as it was three people beating the heck out of him for the pin. Miz is getting closer and closer to the most days ever as champion (he’s less than four months away) and if nothing else has taken away his momentum before, this won’t either.

Clips of Kane vs. Strowman over the last few weeks.

Kane says he remembers putting Strowman in the garbage truck like a symphony of horrors. Tonight, he’ll show Strowman that there are worse things in life than death. Like him for instance.

Here’s Angle to announce that Jordan is off the team due to injury. Before he can name it though, Jordan comes out and begs Angle to let him do it. He’ll be fine by Sunday and he’s seen Angle fight injured so many times. Jordan says Angle picked him because he was the best option and it wasn’t favoritism. He won’t get another chance like this because he’s worked his whole life to get here and wants to represent Raw. Stephanie comes out and tells Kurt to make the decision but HHH comes out as well. HHH gets right to the chase: Jordan is out and he’s in instead. A Pedigree plants Jordan and that’s that.

Finn Balor/Samoa Joe vs. Anderson and Gallows

Joe shoves Balor into the ring to start and it’s rapid fire shots to Anderson early on. Gallows tries to sneak in a cheap shot but Joe runs him over with a clothesline and we take a break. Back with Balor slugging away at Gallows but Anderson takes him down into a chinlock. Anderson gets two off a spinebuster and we take a second break in eight minutes. Back again with Gallows kicking Balor down but a Pele allows the hot tag to Joe. House is cleaned and the Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Anderson. Joe dives onto Gallows and the Coup de Grace ends Anderson at 12:48.

Rating: C-. It says a lot when the match is nearly thirteen minutes and they barely showed enough of it to rate. Balor and Joe as good but unwilling partners (no mention of the Dusty Classic win in the whole match of course) is fine and they should be good additions to Sunday’s stacked match. Anderson and Gallows continue to fall apart as a team but that’s to be expected, sadly enough.

We run down Sunday’s card.

Alexa Bliss doesn’t care if she faces Natalya or Charlotte on Sunday. She doesn’t think much of Smackdown, which she usually DVR’s and forgets to watch later. Maybe she’ll just have to show up on the show. As usual, Bliss’ delivery and facial expressions were outstanding here as she really does come off like the most stuck up woman you want to see get taken down a dozen or so notches. That’s hard to do and she does it to perfection.

Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman jumps Kane and I don’t think we had an opening bell. They head outside with Strowman driving him face first into the barricade but getting whipped into the steps. Kane pulls out a table as the referee isn’t even trying to tell them to get in the ring. Smart move actually. Some chair shots to the back just annoy Strowman, who takes the chair away and lights Kane up with it instead.

With the table set up at ringside, Strowman loads up a superplex, only to have Kane punch his way out to avoid a bad case of death. Kane gets knocked inside but can’t chokeslam him down. Instead it’s a middle rope ax handle and the running powerslam through the ring (that made me jump). The bell never rang so no match but that was quite the finish.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really tricky one to grade as the bad stuff (anytime Stephanie was on screen, the reaction to Jordan, Wyatt getting pinned so easily and most of the wrestling in general) is a bit too much for the good to outweigh but the good is REALLY good. We now have HHH added to Survivor Series, New Day vs. Shield, Bayley on the team and a heck of a promo from Heyman. I’m a heck of a lot more excited for Sunday than I was coming in and that’s one of the best things you can say about a show like this. Good result but not the best trip getting there.

Results

Bayley b. Mickie James and Dana Brooke – Bayley to Belly to James

Enzo Amore/Drew Gulak b. Kalisto/Akira Tozawa – Jordunzo to Tozawa

Jason Jordan b. Bray Wyatt – Rollup

Shield b. Miz/The Bar – TripleBomb to Miz

Finn Balor/Samoa Joe b. Anderson and Gallows – Coup de Grace to Anderson

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series Count-Up – 2002: Eliminate HHH

Survivor Series 2002
Date: November 17, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,930
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

For those of you who have read my old reviews of this show, you might remember that the main event has sent me into various rantings and ravings over the years. It might have ticked me off more than any match ever at one point, though it’s since been topped multiple times. I’m kind of curious to see how I react to it this time around so let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on Big Show vs. Lesnar, which is built around the idea that Lesnar is banged up and can’t throw Big Show around like he can with everyone else. The Elimination Chamber actually takes second billing here.

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Elimination tables match and that would still be Bubba and Spike. The villains are quickly sent outside with Spike being thrown at the Samoans. He’s easily caught and 3 Minute Warning is nice enough to stand there while Bubba drops down for Poetry in Motion from Jeff. Back in and Jamal takes a hurricanrana out of the corner, followed by Jeff playing D-Von in What’s Up.

The first table is set up in the corner and Jeff is backdropped over the top for one heck of a crash. Rosey drives himself through a table (not an elimination) but stands up, allowing Jeff to hit a high crossbody….which just bounces off the big man. The Dudley Dog is countered and Spike is tossed through a table for the first elimination. Bubba and Jeff fight back but can’t get around the monsters.

Rosey takes Jeff outside and loads up a table but Bubba makes the save. A few forearms to the back allow Jeff to climb onto an exit tunnel for the Swanton to get rid of Rosey. Back in and Rico loads Bubba onto a table before setting up a moonsault. In a fairly infamous moment, there’s no Jeff to make the save so Rico stands there for about ten seconds and even Bubba can be seen looking around for Jeff. Rico very clearly shouts “COME ON JEFF” before Hardy crotches him for the save.

Jamal moves the table so Rico only has to take a regular belly to back superplex. That’s so much better you see. Jeff takes Jamal to the floor and tries to run the barricade (as in he climbs onto it and then runs instead of a running jump and then running across) but falls anyway, sending himself head first through a table. That would be twice in a week that he’s blown that spot and for some reason I don’t picture him being punished anytime soon. Thankfully Jamal hits one heck of a top rope splash to put Jeff through a table to get us down to 2-1.

Ever the genius, Jamal tries a hurricanrana with a table right behind him. After the most obvious powerbomb this side of an Undertaker match, we’re down to Bubba vs. Rico. 3 Minute Warning comes back in to beat on Bubba but D-Von comes out to FINALLY reunite with his brother to one heck of a reaction. A quick 3D puts Rico through a table for the win.

Rating: C+. They really didn’t have another option here as the Dudleys belong together. It would take about twelve years before Bubba was able to strike out on his own and even that only kind of worked. The tag division is dying for some better talent and while not the freshest thing in the world, the Dudleys are certainly better than most other options.

The rest of the match was entertaining but my goodness Jeff was embarrassing out there. He can barely do any of his signature stuff without messing something up anymore and yet he’s still out there every single week doing the same spots over and over. Get him some help already before this becomes an even bigger problem than it already is.

Stacy Keibler introduces Saliva to perform Always live at the World. At least we get some highlights for the show as a bonus.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Kidman is challenging after defeating Noble twice in the last two weeks. Noble tries a rollup for the fast pin before stomping Kidman down to really take over. A neckbreaker sets up a bow and arrow as Nidia is her usual VERY excited self. Jamie dives into a dropkick as the announcers talk about the tables match. A Hoshi Geroshi (or however you spell the fireman’s carry into a backbreaker) gets two on the champ, followed by a good looking placha to the floor.

Back in and Noble reverses a backslide into the tiger bomb for two but makes the mistake of putting Kidman on the top. A good looking super DDT plants Noble but since DDTs mean nothing, Jamie is right back up for a hanging DDT off the top for his own near fall. An enziguri drops Noble again and, after a failed Nidia distraction, the shooting star gives us a new champion.

Rating: C+. Some selling issues aside, this was a good, back and forth match with both guys looking strong. The problem is the division has fallen into the same pattern it always has: the champion and one challenger comprise the entire thing and that doesn’t exactly have staying power. The match was good though and Kidman winning the title is fine.

Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit get into it again but Angle insists that they’re amigos. Another long form hug ensues.

Victoria is getting ready but apparently her mirror thinks Trish Stratus is prettier.

We recap Victoria vs. Trish. Victoria claims that Trish slept her way into a job after WWE wanted to sign both of them. Now Victoria is here to get revenge on her former friend. The music sounds like the shower scene from Psycho for a nice touch.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish is defending and this is a hardcore match. Victoria wastes no time and puller her down by the coat before grabbing a broom. JR asks if she’s going to fly it and suggests Victoria is un-Divaesque. That’s probably an unintentional compliment. A trashcan lid gets knocked into the champ’s face and Victoria sends her into the steps. Victoria sets up a trashcan in the corner (with the hole facing the ring), only to have Trish catapult her hands first into said can (that looked horrible and no camera edit was going to save it).

A kick to the head gives Trish two and one heck of a trashcan lid shot knocks Victoria (and her bloody nose) to the floor. The Chick Kick gets two and a HORRIBLE bulldog out of the corner (Victoria’s head hit Trish’s ribs) is good for the same. Victoria blinds her with a fire extinguisher though and a snap suplex of all things gives us a new champion.

Rating: B-. Botches aside, this is a situation where the energy carries the match. They were beating the heck out of each other and you could feel the intensity. The botches and the ending really hold it down but it’s still one of the best women’s matches you’ll see around this time. I know there are still some major issues with the women of this era but this was miles ahead of most things you would see from them at this time.

Eric Bischoff is bragging about the Chamber when Big Show comes up. He’s going to prove Eric wrong for trading him.

Paul Heyman is nervous but says Brock needs to put it all behind him. Tonight they’re in MSG and Heyman is going to do whatever it takes to make sure his client leaves as champion.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and the fans are entirely behind him. Brock gets right in his face but gets tossed into the corner. That earns show a double leg takedown and there’s a belly to back suplex on Show. A German suplex follows and Heyman looks nervous. The ref gets bumped but Lesnar belly to bellies Show anyway. Heyman slides in a chair and Brock cracks Show in the head with it, setting up the F5. Another referee comes down but Heyman pulls him out at two. Reality sets in as the chase is on but Show chairs Lesnar in the bad ribs. A chokeslam onto the chair gives Lesnar his first pinfall loss.

Rating: C-. They did everything they could here and thankfully it was really short. Aside from the obvious, I still have a major problem with the story: why did Heyman go through with the screwjob? Lesnar proved him wrong by suplexing and F5ing Big Show but Heyman turned on him anyway. Wouldn’t it make more sense to stick with the more dominant force when you still have Lesnar to protect you? I’d assume it’s because of Heyman and Lesnar’s issues but Heyman has been able to talk Lesnar down before. It’s far from the worst stretch ever but I’m still not sure it makes the most sense.

Heyman and Show run to the parking lot and drive away.

We recap the Smackdown Tag Team Title match. All three teams have traded the titles for over a month now with one classic match after another. The only possible option was a triple threat match and Stephanie McMahon has made it an elimination match for even more fun. This is the real Smackdown main event and they’ve certainly earned that honor with everything they’ve done so far.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle vs. Los Guerreros vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Edge and Mysterio are defending and Angle/Benoit still can’t get along. Benoit and Mysterio start things off with Chris going head first into the buckle. Edge, in some shiny tights, comes in to drop Angle with a forearm. It’s back to Rey for a springboard splash on Chavo as they’re tagging very quickly here. Eddie comes in to a very noticeable pop and keeps Rey in trouble with some forearms to the back.

The fast tags continue as Angle comes in and goes shoulder first into the post. He’s still able to knock Rey off the top though and the champs stay in trouble. Benoit stays on Mysterio with some rapid fire suplexes as Los Guerreros are (wisely) content with staying on the floor. The Angle Slam doesn’t work so Kurt clotheslines Rey’s head off for two instead. We hit a long front facelock until Rey fights up for a spinwheel kick to the jaw. That’s enough for the hot tag to Edge as everything breaks down.

Rey hurricanranas Eddie to the floor, leaving Edge to get caught in an ankle lock/Crossface combination. Somehow he doesn’t tap out immediately so it’s Rey making the save, followed by a running corkscrew dive onto Chavo and Angle. Benoit grabs the German suplex on Edge, only to have Eddie come in off the top with a sunset flip to send both guys flying. Everyone gets up so Benoit sends Eddie outside, followed by the rolling German suplexes on Edge. Those things always look great.

Eddie gives Edge the frog splash but Benoit breaks it up with a Swan Dive for no apparent reason. Angle comes back in with the ankle lock on Eddie while Benoit Crossfaces Edge, only to have Chavo save Edge with the title. Kurt picks up the title so Benoit thinks it was him, leaving Edge to spear Benoit for the first elimination. That leaves us with two but Benoit and Angle wreck everyone before heading to the back. What poor sportsmanship.

We settle down to Eddie grabbing a sleeper on Edge, followed by a front facelock in case that’s too intense for you. Edge flapjacks both Guerreros and brings Rey back in as this isn’t exactly the break neck pace you would expect. Everything breaks down again and the pop up hurricanrana gets two on Eddie. That would look to set up the West Coast Pop but Chavo gets in a belt shot, knocking Rey into the Lasso From El Paso for the submission and the titles.

Rating: B. This wasn’t as good as I remember but I think that’s because I just recently watched all the TV matches, which were almost all better. This had too much to live up to and there’s only so much you can do when you’re asked to go out and have a masterpiece. The belt shots didn’t do much to help either as they’re hardly anything interesting and you expect more from these guys.

It’s still a good match and the best thing on the show by far though and it deserves a bit more than just criticism. Some of the sequences were excellent and showed some creativity, along with Benoit and Angle suplexing everything in sight. If this was one of the matches that took place on TV, it would be considered a classic. Some more time would have helped as well.

Here’s Christopher Nowinski to say he’s smarter than the rest of the crowd. After some lame New York Yankees jokes, Matt Hardy (who keeps the temperature at a toasty 75 degrees and only drinks low fat chocolate milk) comes out to say this place is sucking the Mattitude out of him. The payoff is Scott Steiner, who shows up and destroys both guys because we haven’t seen Matt get beaten up recently.

Shawn Michaels is ready to talk about why he believes he can win but RNN BREAKING NEWS tells us that Randy came here to watch. Luckily a sexy flight attendant gave him an extra pillow so there was no further damage to his shoulder.

Long video on the Elimination Chamber which doesn’t really tell us anything. Granted that’s because there isn’t a story here. Basically Bischoff wanted to top Stephanie’s pay per view and invented the Chamber. They’ve made no secret of the fact that this is ALL about HHH vs. Shawn Michaels.

HHH says he’s gone through everyone so he’ll go through everyone tonight too.

Bischoff comes out to walk through the Chamber and explain the rules. This time really couldn’t have gone to the Tag Team Title match? Just put it on a graphic or something…..which they do while Bischoff is still talking.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T. vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Rob Van Dam

HHH is defending. Saliva, at the World, plays Jericho’s music for a cool bit. As the entrances go on forever, it occurs to me how much Shawn’s hair looks like AJ Styles’ soccer mom look. HHH and Van Dam start things off with Rob going straight to the kicks. A backdrop puts HHH onto the steel floor and he hits the cage wall three times in a row. The champ is busted open and Van Dam monkey flips him onto the cage again.

Rolling Thunder over the top makes things even worse as it’s all Van Dam so far. Rob climbs up on top of Jericho’s chamber and gets his legs pulled down into it. Somehow that’s still not enough for HHH to do anything as Rob flips down onto HHH. See? He’s giving Van Dam a rub right now!

Jericho is in third but gets kicked down almost immediately as Rob stays on a roll. In your first ever Chamber highlight reel moment, Jericho catapults Van Dam at the cage wall and Rob just hangs onto it instead of crashing. HHH gets back up and knees Van Dam in the head, meaning it’s time for the double teaming to begin. Rob kicks them both down again and it’s Booker T in fourth to even things up, despite Van Dam doing just fine on his own.

Jericho and HHH are sent to the floor so we can get a Spinarooni, followed by a slugout with Van Dam. The good guys clean house again and it’s HHH getting knocked down, allowing Rob to climb an individual chamber. That means a Five Star, with his knee going right into HHH’s throat which put him out of action for a few weeks. Van Dam seems to have hurt his knee as well, allowing Booker to eliminate him with a missile dropkick. HHH can barely move so here’s Kane to get us back to four.

Jericho is launched through the bulletproof (yes bulletproof) glass to draw some more blood. Chris is fine enough to hit Booker low, followed by a chokeslam and the Lionsault to get rid of Booker. Now that the two guys who have been more over than the entire roster for the last three months are gone, let’s get on with the REAL entertainment.

Jericho and Kane slowly fight until HHH is slammed off the top. Shawn, looking like he’s wrestled one match in four and a half years and in hideous brown tights for some reason, comes in and gets to clean house for a bit. Kane chokeslams everyone but eats a superkick, Pedigree and Lionsault to get us down to three. Jericho and HHH team up on Shawn with HHH rubbing his head against the steel to bust Shawn open. A ram into the wall gives Shawn an opening and he forearms HHH, only to get bulldogged down.

The Lionsault gets two and Jericho is so frustrated that he gets caught in the Walls. HHH makes the save with a DDT but gets in a fight with Jericho over who can pin Shawn. Jericho grabs the Walls on HHH but gets superkicked for the elimination. As anyone paying attention expected, we’re down to HHH vs. Shawn with a spinebuster going straight for the bad back.

Shawn gets thrown through the glass as we really crank up the emotions. The slow beating continues with Shawn being thrown outside again, only to catapult HHH into the wall. Shawn’s top rope elbow gets no cover and HHH grabs the Pedigree for a delayed two. Another Pedigree attempt is countered and Sweet Chin Music gives Shawn the pin and the title.

Rating: B. I’m still not sure what to think of this match. Above all else, it’s long, far longer than it needed to be. The Chamber itself did help and was interesting to see but they need to tweak things a bit (lower the time to four minutes or so). It’s still good but there’s the other problem that it’s kind of hard to overcome: the whole thing felt like a big waste of time until we got to the ending.

That ending of course is Shawn vs. HHH and they might as well have just put up a big clock counting down until we got there. No one else mattered in this match and WWE did nothing to hide it. That makes for an ending similar to Wrestlemania XXXII with Roman Reigns vs. HHH: there’s no drama and it makes for a boring match because you’re just waiting to get to the part that matters.

While I still have issues about guys like Booker, Kane, Van Dam and Jericho being treated as second class citizens so HHH and Shawn can do it one more time (as in the second one more time), it’s not as bad as it once was. After watching the TV shows building up to this, it’s not like this was exactly shocking and the four of them were hardly made to look like real threats to take the title. That doesn’t make it any better but it does make things a bit easier to take.

Overall Rating: C+. This show is pretty much all over the place with good action (there really isn’t a bad match on the card) but sweet goodness some of the choices make your head spin. We really are watching a show in 2002 where Big Show and Shawn Michaels walked out with the World Titles. On top of that we had a less than mind blowing Tag Team Title match which was probably the highlight.

The big problem is that aside from the Chamber itself debuting, there really isn’t anything on here that feels big. Big Show winning was more groan inducing than anything else and Shawn winning felt like we were seeing the inevitable, though the celebration felt big. There’s nothing on here that’s going to really stick with you and that’s not good as the show is worth seeing for the action alone. Overall it’s good but really not remarkable, which is kind of an odd way to compliment a show.

Ratings Comparison

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Original: B

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Victoria vs. Trish Stratus

Original: C-

2012 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B-

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D-

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Los Guerreros vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Original: B

2012 Redo: B+

2017 Redo: B

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2017 Redo: C+

I must have been in a REALLY bad mood when I watched the main event for the second time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/02/20/survivor-series-2002-the-longest-rant-about-anything-ive-ever-done/

And the 2012 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/10/survivor-series-count-up-2002/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series Count-Up – 2001: Vince’s Last Laugh and Lost Dollars

Survivor Series 2001
Date: November 18, 2001
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,142
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

While there’s a full card to go with the Survivor Series match, none of it matters compared to the main event. Some of the WCW and WWF Titles will be unified as well, which was a major problem at the time. There were so many belts floating around at the time that it didn’t matter when one would change hands. Thankfully a lot of those problems will be wrapped up tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a cool concept as it shows all of the old logos for the WWF over the years and a bunch of great moments in company history, set to a song called The End Is Here.

European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow

Christian is in the Alliance and defending. He greets his fans in South Carolina (that’s what he said) and calls himself awesome. Snow comes out to the Tough Enough (reality competition series where Snow was head trainer) theme which was quite a catchy tune. Snow takes him down to the mat to frustrates the champ. Christian comes back with a foot on Snow’s face in the corner followed by a Russian legsweep for two. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down.

Al fights up and hits his headbutts but Christian hits a tiger driver backbreaker for two. Snow gets rammed into the buckle and things slow down again. The trapping headbutts stop Christian again and Snow escapes the reverse DDT into a neckbreaker for two. Heyman schills for the Alliance guys in an always funny bit.

A sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow and now Christian’s reverse DDT scores for no cover. Instead Christian talks a lot of trash and gets rolled up for two. A top rope cross body is rolled through by Snow and the Snow Plow gets two. There’s the Unprettier out of nowhere to keep the title in the Alliance. That was quick.

Rating: C-. This is one of those shows where anything but the main event means nothing, which makes the first hour and a half of the show pretty uninteresting to sit through. That’s exactly the case here. This match was fine but it could have been on Smackdown on any given week. Snow and Christian are both good hands so a good match is really nothing too shocking.

Austin arrives and yells at the Alliance because he doesn’t like being accused of being a traitor to his team. This would be a lot better if Stephanie had more acting ability than say, a carrot. Austin yells at everyone on the team and says stop being paranoid.

Vince and Linda arrive with Vince brimming with confidence. Cole comes up and says this might be their last night in business but Vince doesn’t want to hear talk like that. Vince talks about taking calculated risks and being confident because someone is jumping to the WWF. Regal comes up and says he doesn’t buy the idea that Austin is jumping back to the WWF.

William Regal vs. Tajiri

These two are former friends. Regal hurt Tajiri’s (Japanese wrestler with a lot of fast kicks) girlfriend Torrie (not the same person with the same name but different spelling from years ago) on Smackdown to set this up. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion and was supposed to face X-Pac in a title for title match, but according to Commissioner Mick Foley, “No one cared about X-Pac or the Light Heavyweight Title anyway”. Tajiri fires off a kick but gets suplexed right back down.

The knee trembler takes Tajiri down but Tajiri goes after Regal’s knee with the kicks. There’s the Tarantula and Regal is bleeding from the nose. A handspring elbow gets two for Tajiri but Regal ties his head up in the ropes to stop the momentum dead. Regal tries a powerbomb but gets countered by another kick to the head. The Buzzsaw Kick misses and there’s the Tiger Bomb from Regal for the pin. Too short to rate but it was fine.

Regal powerbombs him again post match. Torrie (looking GREAT in a purple top and leather pants) comes out to check on Tajiri, only to get powerbombed as well.

We recap Edge vs. Test. These two are both midcard champions after the seemingly dozens of never ending midcard title changes going on at this point. Edge is US Champion, Test is Intercontinental Champion, tonight only one belt survives.

Test complains about the makeup lady not rubbing in the oil well enough on him. Stacy (his future girlfriend) comes up and agrees with Test. Test hits on her and she’ll think about it if he wins.

Edge compares himself to Test and says that there are a lot of similarities between them. The difference is that Edge hasn’t been dumped by every chick on the planet. Edge makes fun of Test for sounding wooden and that’s about it.

Intercontinental Title/US Title: Edge vs. Test

They fight over control to start with Edge taking over via a series of forearms to the head. Test powers him down and goes after the ribs with a wide ranging selection of stomps. We head to the floor with Edge being dropped across the barricade to further the attack on the ribs. Back in and Edge hits a dropkick to take over before we head outside again. They’re quickly back inside and a swinging neckbreaker gets two for Edge.

Test drops Edge onto the top rope ribs first to reinjure him and the taller of the blond Canadian champions takes over again. Test puts on a chinlock as the match slows down again. Edge fights up and avoids a corner charge before hitting a middle rope missile dropkick for two. A middle rope cross body misses though and Test puts him on the top rope.

Edge blocks a superplex with some CANADIAN right hands to the ribs but a sunset bomb doesn’t work. Test dives off the top but jumps right into a dropkick to put him down. The problem with this match is neither guy has been able to build up any kind of a run with the title as both have changed hands four times since the Invasion began about four months ago. How can you get behind either guy as a big time champion in that little bit of time? On top of that, Edge has been champion for six days and Test for thirteen. That’s not exactly Honky Tonk Man unifying with Luger in the late 80s.

Both guys are down now but it’s Edge up first with some clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Test’s pumphandle slam is countered into the Edge-O-Matic for two. Test spears Edge down for two but the big boot misses. There’s the pumphandle for two but Test’s powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana. Edge’s spear gets a close two but he can’t hit the Edgecution. Test tries a full nelson slam but Edge rolls through for the pin and both titles.

Rating: C+. This started pretty slow but it got going once Edge was able to start countering Test’s power stuff. In other words, Edge did the work to make Test’s generic big man offense look decent. This was probably the match of the night so far, which isn’t surprising given how hot Edge got in the next year.

Angle comes up to see a stressed out Stephanie. My goodness her acting is bad. I know I say that a lot, but IT’S FREAKING TERRIBLE. She says if the Alliance loses tonight, she’ll have to buy her own groceries and wash her own car. She can’t be a…..a…..a REGULAR PERSON!!! Angle reminds her that she’s special and doesn’t think Austin will jump.

A cage is lowered.

Jeff Hardy and Lita are talking about Matt Hardy being different lately. Matt comes up and yells at them for acting strange and not being focused enough. It turns into a rallying speech and things seem ok. The guys leave and Trish comes out of the same locker room Matt came out of earlier. Keep in mind that Matt is dating Lita at this point.

WCW Tag Team Titles/WWF Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

In a cage. The Dudleys are WCW Tag Team Champions and the Hardys are the WWF Tag Team Champions and Stacy is STUNNING at this point as the Dudleys’ manager. All four belts get laid out between the guys in the ring and it’s time to go. You can win by pin/submission/both members escaping. There are tags required here and it’s Matt vs. Bubba to start. Matt can’t get anywhere so it’s off to Jeff who walks into a Boss Man Slam for two.

D-Von comes in as Heyman talks about Big Daddy Dudley, which JR could not care less about. Back to Matt who rolls D-Von up for two but walks into a reverse inverted DDT for two. Bubba comes in again and drops a bunch of elbows for two. The Dudleys tag in and out a lot and it’s back to Bubba for more punching to Matt’s ribs. Bubba tries to ram Matt into the cage but gets countered into a reverse DDT.

Off to Jeff who cleans house as everything breaks down. Poetry in Motion hits Bubba and Matt climbs but D-Von makes the save. There’s a Bubba Bomb to Jeff which should likely hurt Bubba as well. Bubba goes up again but Matt slams him down for two. Matt gets rammed into the cage but when the Dudleys try to do the same to Jeff, he grabs the cage and tries to climb out, only to get caught in a Doomsday Device (Paul: “WHAT A RUSH!”).

Matt gets crushed against the cage and Bubba whips D-Von into him for good measure. Bubba splashes him as well and the Dudleys are in full control. Jeff gets in a shot and Matt hits a top rope double clothesline to shift the momentum just as fast though. A DDT puts Bubba down for two and Jeff hits the legdrop between D-Von’s legs. A double backdrop takes Ray down again and the Hardys go up.

Matt hits a legdrop and Jeff hits a splash off the top at the same time for two on Bubba. Matt makes a climb but gets pulled down with one leg still stuck in the cage. What’s Up to Jeff and Bubba asks Stacy for a table. Stacy hits on Nick Patrick and picks the key out of his pocket. There’s a table in the ring now but Matt breaks up the 3D by jumping Bubba. Why D-Von didn’t flapjack Jeff through the table is anyone’s guess.

Bubba and Matt go tot he top and pound away at each other until Bubba is knocked down. Matt climbs down to escape but he’s left alone against the Dudleys. D-Von is rammed into the cage a few times and Jeff goes up as D-Von climbs onto the table for no apparent reason. Jeff looks down and sees D-Von there before diving off the top of the cage, but the Swanton misses. Bubba covers the table and therefore Jeff as well for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good brawl between these teams and it furthers the Hardys’ issues, but at the end of the day this feud was played out at this point. There was nothing left for these two teams to do and at this point it was being dragged out way too far. Still though, good match and a good way to I believe finally end this nearly two year long feud.

Jeff is taken out on a stretcher.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and admits that his job (WWF Commissioner) means nothing.

Scotty 2 Hotty is about to be in the Immunity Battle Royal but Test beats him up to take his spot.

Immunity Battle Royal

Test, Billy Gunn, Bradshaw, Faarooq, Lance Storm, Billy Kidman, Diamond Dallas Page, Albert, Tazz, Perry Saturn, Raven, Chuck Palumbo, Crash Holly, Justin Credible, Shawn Stasiak, Steven Richards, Tommy Dreamer, The Hurricane, Spike Dudley, Hugh Morrus, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Funaki

I won’t bother explaining who all of these people are as most of them won’t be around again after this show. Some are from the Alliance and some are from the WWF but no matter who wins the main event tonight, the winner of this is guaranteed a job for a year. Stasiak is thrown to the floor before the bell rings and is apparently out. Test drops to the floor to hide as Tazz comes in late. Since it’s a battle royal there’s really not much to talk about here. Everyone punches everyone and no one is put out for awhile. Heyman freaks out about Tazz because Tazz choked him out on Smackdown.

Hurricane dives at Faarooq and is clotheslined out by Bradshaw. Albert throws Saturn out and Test, who is back in now, dumps Faarooq. Page is put out by someone we can’t see and Storm superkicks Palumbo out. Morrus and Chavo run in as wildcards because they tried to jump from the Alliance to the WWF on Raw but got fired as a result. Billy dumps Chavo as Morrus is eliminated as well. Tazz dumps Dreamer and Crash as Storm low bridges Spike out. Bradshaw’s clothesline kills Richards and he’s gone.

Tazz stops to run his mouth to Heyman and gets dumped by Billy. Test and Kidman put Albert out. We’re down to Bradshaw, Kidman, Gunn, Test and Storm. I’ve missed a bunch of eliminations but most of them weren’t shown. The fall away slam puts Kidman out and we’re down to four. Bradshaw kicks Storm down and might have hurt his ankle. Things slow way down as Billy and Bradshaw hang on for dear life. Storm and Test team up to put Bradshaw out but Test dumps Storm as well. A big boot eliminates Gunn and Test wins immunity.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but at the end of the day, it’s a battle royal so what are you expecting to get? Test would fall through the floor in the next year with no one caring about him at all. This was a pretty big batch of jobbers in there though and that doesn’t really make for an interesting match. Then again, neither do most battle royals.

Sacrifice video by Creed. This was a promotional campaign at the time, with highlight videos set to My Sacrifice by Creed.

Booker is worried about Austin jumping. Shane says it’s ok and stick with it.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Ivory vs. Lita vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jacqueline vs. Jazz

Chyna relinquished the title earlier in the year without being pinned and then disappeared so this is the best we’ve got to pick from for the new champion. This is Jazz’s debut and the fans don’t seem to care. Why does no one care? Because Jazz meant nothing in ECW and was a face there but is a heel here. Mighty Molly is Molly Holly as a superhero. Jazz and Lita start things off with Jazz pounding away. Off to Jackie vs. Molly off some blind tags and somehow even fewer people care about Jackie.

Jackie dropkicks Molly down and it’s off to Ivory who gets caught in a sunset flip for two. This is one fall to a finish. Ivory slingshots Jackie into the ropes and it’s off to Trish for some forearms. Lita gets knocked to the floor and the three Alliance chicks (Ivory, Jazz, Molly) triple team Trish for a bit. Jackie double crosses Lita on Poetry in Motion and everyone hits their finishers on everyone else. The Litasault gets two on Ivory as Jazz saves. Lita gets backdropped to the floor and it’s Ivory vs. Trish left. Stratusfaction gives Trish her first title.

Rating: D. It was short, the match wasn’t any good, Trish looked great in the skin tight barely there pink shorts, Lita looked good as usual, and that’s all I’ve got here. As usual with situations like this, when the previous champion doesn’t lose the title, the new champion comes in at a big disadvantage.

Vince looks at Team WWF and gives them a pep talk, bringing up names like Dr. Jerry Graham, Peter Maivia, Gorilla Monsoon (pop) and Andre the Giant (BIG pop). He understands he might be looking at a group of losers, and if that happens no one will ever forgive them. After listening to that speech, I want to go fight three WWF guys and one guy each from ECW and WCW!

We recap the main event which has been summed up pretty well already. Vince was originally on the team but replaced by Big Show and Rock and Jericho are having major issues. Rock is WCW champion and Austin is WWF Champion. This really does feel like a huge match. The video is set to Control by Puddle of Mudd which fits really well.

Basically Vince said that he was tired of all of the Invasion (as were a lot of fans at this point) and offered one winner take all match with the losing organization going out of business. Angle joined the Alliance after the announcement but Vince says Austin is coming back to the WWF, giving the Alliance reason to be concerned. Austin stunned Angle on TV recently to further that idea.

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

WWF: The Rock, Chris Jericho, Big Show, Undertaker, Kane

Alliance: Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Booker T, Rob Van Dam, Shane McMahon

Everyone gets individual entrances so it takes forever to get to the start of the match. As those are going on, a few things to notice here: Team Alliance has one of the biggest WWF superstars ever, a guy that at this point had only wrestled in the WWF, a WCW guy, an ECW guy, and the then heir to the WWF throne.

Also, as goes the stereotype for the WWF, most of their guys are big and strong instead of the more athletic styles of the Alliance team. One other thing: JR keeps up one of the annoying inaccuracies in wrestling by saying that Undertaker won the World Title in his WWF debut. It was a year later, which you should know if you’ve read this far.

Rock and Austin start fighting before the bell and you know the early advantage doesn’t mean a thing in this one. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle rope elbow for a very early two. Rock comes back with a middle finger elbow of his own and dares Shane to get in. Off to Booker who gets clotheslined down for two as Shane makes the save. Expect to hear that line quite a bit. Off to Jericho as Heyman blames Vince for the end of ECW.

Van Dam and Jericho have a nice fast paced sequence with Jericho hitting a spinwheel kick for no cover. Jericho chops away but misses a dropkick, allowing Rob to hit the cartwheel into a moonsault for two. For reasons likely related to high levels of drug use, Van Dam tries a standing hurricanrana on Jericho, only to be countered into the Walls. Shane makes the third save of the match already and it’s off to Angle vs. Kane.

Angle gets thrown around but eventually slips behind Kane and hits a German Suplex for two. Kane comes back with a side slam and the top rope clothesline for two of his own as Shane saves again. Off to the Dead Man who pounds away but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Booker to get the tag. Undertaker immediately drops Booker and hits a legdrop, but Shane breaks up his fifth near fall of the match.

There’s Old School to Booker followed by that lifting wristlock which always looks painful. Off to a short armed scissors followed by a clothesline for two, resulting in ANOTHER save from Shane. Austin comes in to pound on Undertaker (and causing Heyman to say WHAT after everything JR says) but he gets caught in Old School. Say it with me: Shane makes the save. Undertaker gets caught in the wrong corner and quintuple teamed.

Angle is in next and tries to slug it out with the Dead Man for some reason. Undertaker escapes a German and DDTs Angle down. There’s the tag to Big Show and JR almost immediately bashes him, saying Show can make a huge difference, or he can make some huge mistakes. Show throws around RVD and Angle before clearing off the entire Alliance corner. Angle gets underneath Show and there’s the Slam followed by an Ax kick from Booker (and a Spinarooni) and a Five Star and a top rope elbow from Shane for the first elimination.

Shane dances around in celebration before turning around to meet The Rock who beats the living tar out of Shane with right hands in the corner. Off to Kane for a chokeslam, then a tombstone from Undertaker and a Lionsault from Jericho to tie it up. That’s the best way to go as Show and Shane were the weak links on both teams. Angle vs. Jericho now with Jericho hitting the forearm to start. A double underhook backbreaker puts Angle down but Austin saves.

Angle uses an amateur takedown and brings in Booker to slam Chris a few times. RVD gets a tag but one of his shoulders in the corner is countered into a sunset flip for two. Off to Kane who catches a punch from RVD. Van Dam’s comeback? Kick the guy in the head. Kane pulls Booker in and kicks him in the face too but the numbers game allows Van Dam to take Kane down and hit the Five Star. Rob takes too long to cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam, but Booker kicks Kane. Everything breaks down and Rob kicks Kane from the top for the pin to make it 4-3.

Undertaer pounds on Van Dam in the corner while everyone else is fighting on the floor. Austin and Angle get in as well and Undertaker has to fight all four guys at once. He gets them all in a corner and keeps charging at all of them with clotheslines in a cool sequence. Snake Eyes and a big boot take Angle down and there’s a Last Ride for him as well. Booker comes in with a chair but Undertaker boots him down, leaving himself open to a Stunner from Austin and the pin by Angle. That leaves us with Austin/Angle/Booker/RVD vs. Rock/Jericho.

Booker stomps on Rock but Rocky comes back with right hands. A side kick takes Rock right back down but Rock does the same with a DDT for two. Booker charges into a Samoan Drop for two as Austin makes the save. Rock whips Booker into Angle and grabs a rollup to eliminate Mr. T, making it 3-2.

Rob is in next but as he goes up, Rock kind of powerbombs him off the top for two. Jericho gets the tag and hits a running neckbreaker for two before chopping away in the corner. Van Dam avoids the Lionsault and kicks Chris’ head off, followed by the split legged moonsault for no cover. Jericho pops up and hits a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to tie it up at two each.

Austin slingshots Rock into the post on the floor while Angle and Jericho fight in the ring. Angle picks Jericho’s ankle and stomps away on him as Heyman thinks the Alliance can find a place for the Rock. Back to Austin to pound away on Chris and hit a superplex for two. Austin hits a kind of northern lights/belly to belly suplex for two and here’s Angle again. Jericho puts Kurt in the ankle lock but Kurt quickly escapes and hits a clothesline to take over.

It’s back to Austin for a suplex and an elbow to the face. Angle comes in and stomps away before it’s back to Austin who stomps away as well. We hit one of the few chinlocks in this match as Jericho is in trouble. Jericho fights up and it’s a double tag to bring in Rock vs. Angle with the Great One quickly hooking a Sharpshooter on Kurt for an even faster tap. Heyman LOSES IT in a great moment.

Off to Austin vs. Jericho with Chris trying the Walls but Austin rakes the eyes to escape. Austin can’t put Jericho in the Boston crab either but he gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Steve loads up a superplex but gets shoved down, followed by a missile dropkick for Jericho for two. Austin counters a rollup out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to get us down to Rock vs. Austin.

Rock hits a bad spinebuster but Jericho hits a Breakdown on Rock to take him down in a double cross. It’s not joining the Alliance, but rather just personal hatred. That gets two for Austin andUndertaker comes out to stalk Jericho to the back. Austin pounds away before launching Rock over the top and out to the floor. They fight on the floor with Austin being laid on the table and slapped in the chest over and over.

Austin comes back but gets sent over the announce table and punched in the face by Rock. Back in Rock chops away but gets caught in the whip spinebuster from Austin. Austin puts on a bad Sharpshooter and there’s your Montreal reference. Rock finally makes the rope so Austin grabs the WWF Title. Rock ducks the swing and puts Austin the Sharpshooter but he’s afraid to let go of the belt for some reason. I guess realizing he has a job no matter what, he grabs the rope instead.

Back up and Austin’s Stunner is countered into a Stunner from Rock. Why that puts Rock down after Rock had been in control for awhile is beyond me but whatever. Rock covers but here’s Nick Patrick to pull Hebner out. A Rock Bottom to Patrick is broken up and Austin Rock Bottoms Rock for two. Austin drills Patrick and pulls Hebner back in, only to be sent into him again as Rock counters the Stunner. There’s the Stunner to Rock but there’s no referee. Angle runs in and nails Austin with the title, letting Rock hit the Rock Bottom for the pin and the death of the Alliance. JR to Heyman: “You’re out of work! AGAIN!”

Rating: A. This felt like a main event and was very entertaining too. It runs forty five minutes bell to bell and feels like about half of that. At the end of the day, it was pretty clear what was going to happen but that doesn’t make it a bad match. Rock vs. Austin was pretty much done for a long time after this match, which is the right call as they had run it a lot this year. Great stuff here though.

Everyone celebrates and Vince comes out for the big dramatic pose, because this whole storyline was all about Vince and his kids.

Overall Rating: B+. Like I said, as goes the main event, so goes the show. The rest of the show isn’t bad but the main event is over an hour counting buildup video and entrances and all that jazz. The rest of the show isn’t bad at all with a good cage match and nothing truly bad that didn’t involve Trish looking great, so I can’t complain much here. Also, it gets rid of the Alliance which makes things better already.

As for the Invasion, I could go on at great length, but in short form: it was the biggest waste of time, money, and potential that there ever could be in wrestling. This was the biggest storyline you could possibly ask for and they BLEW IT. There are multiple options you could go with here. One idea is have no mention on TV of the WWF buying WCW and just keep it going with WWF guys in charge behind the scenes. Think a network might have been interested with it being under the direction of the biggest wrestling company ever?

Another option: have the Alliance win. At the end of the day any money they’ve got goes into the WWF’s pocket as they own EVERYTHING, so what difference does it make? Granted that was never going to happen with Vince’s ego, but why let money get in the way of Vince feeling good about himself? The Invasion could have been so much more but it wound up running about five months with the WWF dominating the whole way through. Such a shame and a loss for wrestling fans who had waited for so many years for a chance to have this happen.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Al Snow

Original: C+

Redo: C-

William Regal vs. Tajiri

Original: C

Redo: N/A

Edge vs. Test

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

Original: B+

Redo: B-

Battle Royal

Original: N/A

Redo: C-

Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Jacqueline vs. Ivory vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: D

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

Original: B

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: B+

Like I said, as the main event goes, so goes the show. That’s apparently the case here as I liked both better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/10/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2001-the-end-of-the-alliance-thank-goodness/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6