Royal Rumble 2001
Date: January 21, 2001
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 16,056
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Austin is back and that’s by far the biggest change from last year. He’s been on a warpath after Rikishi and I think HHH for running him down last year. Other than that there isn’t much going on in the Rumble. We also have HHH defending against Angle and Jericho vs. Benoit with twenty minutes and a ladder. I think we’ll have another solid show here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is what you would expect: one out of thirty will win and the rest will fall.

Tag Titles: Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boys

The Canadians have the titles and the Dudleys have concussions. It’s a brawl to start with the champions trying to bail very quickly. We wind up with Edge vs. D-Von to start as the challenger gets two off a neckbreaker. Off to Christian who is elbowed down for two of his own. Bubba comes in as Jerry makes fun of the Dudleys’ injuries. A side slam gets two on Christian and it’s off to D-Von vs. Edge again.

Christian finally goes for the back of D-Von’s injured head to give Edge control and we get into the meat of the match. Christian gets the tag and starts pounding away on D-Von’s head, followed by a neckbreaker from Edge for two. After a quick chinlock Edge hits a neckbreaker for two more as Bubba looks like he’s about to cry. Since it’s a Dudleys match, the fans want tables. Lawler wants gumbo.

D-Von breaks up a spike piledriver for reasons of wanting to stay alive, catapulting Edge into Christian. Edge and D-Von clothesline each other and the referee misses the ensuing hot tag. A Conchairto misses D-Von and there’s the seen hot tag to Bubba. A pair of hot shots takes down a pair of Canadians and there’s a Bubba Bomb to Christian. What’s Up hits Edge but wouldn’t that hurt D-Von’s head even more?

D-Von goes to get a table and the distraction lets Edge get a title belt. Bubba ducks the shot and gets a VERY close two off a rollup. 3D is broken up by a spear to Bubba and a DDT to D-Von but Bubba kicks out again. The champions try What’s Up but the Dudleys escape and the 3D on Edge gives us new champions.

Rating: B. This is one of those annoying matches where it’s really good and therefore there’s nothing to make fun of. These guys had some of the best tag matches the WWF has ever seen and this was no exception, with all four guys looking great out there. Notice something about Edge and Christian and the Hardys: they came from tag teams but they were allowed to grow up in said tag teams, meaning once they made the transition to singles matches they had a far easier time. That NEVER happens today which is why tag teams don’t make good singles wrestlers anymore. The crowd is white hot tonight too.

Drew Carey is here. He’s promoting an improv comedy PPV and somehow got in the WWE HOF out of it.

Vince says Austin will be in the Rumble despite what happened on Smackdown with HHH. What actually happened isn’t mentioned but whatever.

HHH tells Stephanie to not come to the ring with her tonight but she says she’ll be there to take care of Trish. Drew Carey comes in and pleasantries are exchanged. He talks about meeting Kamala in an airport and plugs his PPV a bit. Drew seems cool here at least. Stephanie offers to introduce him to Trish for some reason.

The APA shows each other their Rumble numbers. Crash comes in and says he’ll throw them both out even though they’re friends.

We recap Jericho vs. Benoit. Do you really need an explanation here? They suplex each other a lot and fight over the IC Title so tonight it’s a ladder match with Benoit defending. Oh and Benoit has hurt Jericho’s arm.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

It’s a slugout to start with Jericho getting a very early advantage. Benoit tries the Crossface but has to escape the Walls instead. Jericho misses a charge and hits the post before missing the springboard dropkick and crashing to the floor. Benoit posts him and goes for the ladder but stops to send Jericho into the steps. We’re only three minutes into the match though so Jericho stops Benoit’s climb. A ladder shot to the face puts Benoit down and the referee tells them they have thirteen minutes left.

Jericho lays the ladder across the top rope and of course goes face first into it as a result. Good to see that even Canadians follow the first law of wrestling. Benoit tries a suicide dive but Jericho puts up a chair, causing Benoit massive head trauma. Jericho tries to ride the ladder from the apron onto Benoit on the barricade but the other Chris moves out of the way. A ladder to the face stops Jericho again and now Benoit swings a chair.

Back in and Benoit loads up a ladder in the corner before ramming Jericho face first into it. Jericho gets up and puts the ladder in the corner again before tying Benoit’s legs between the rungs for a kind of Russian legsweep off the middle rope. Benoit comes right back with a dropkick to send the ladder into Jericho’s face and a hard belly to back suplex. The ladder is placed on the top rope again and Benoit’s face is whipped into it HARD. Jericho immediately follows up by see-sawing the ladder into Benoit’s face. Almost every one of these shots would be classified as FREAKING OW MAN.

A missile dropkick puts Benoit down again but he saves a climb attempt by Jericho. Benoit suplexes Jericho out to the floor and both guys are down again. Benoit goes up again but has to stop to kick Jericho away. Jericho gets up anyway and bends Benoit backwards into the Walls ON TOP OF THE LADDER. Benoit falls on his head but still kicks the ladder over to stop Jericho. AWESOME sequence there.

Jericho drills him with the ladder and goes up, but Benoit immediately pulls him down into the Crossface. Jericho taps out but it means nothing other than pleasure for Benoit here. Benoit sends him shoulder first into the post but Jericho comes back by sending Benoit face first into the ladder. The ladder is moved to the corner and both guys climb, resulting in Jericho being superplexed back down.

The Swan Dive hits the mat though and Benoit is in big trouble. Jericho puts the ladder on top of Benoit’s ribs, but the champion shoves it over anyway from the mat, sending Jericho face first into the buckle and out to the floor. Benoit goes up again but gets shoved out to the floor, allowing Jericho to sprint up the ladder and win the title.

Rating: A+. Take two Canadians, give them a ladder and 19 minutes and this is what you should expect. These two beat on each other HARD and the match was excellent as a result. They came up with some new stuff while mixing in basic stuff like HIT THE GUY IN THE FACE WITH A LADDER but it was so intense that it became a classic. Check this one out.

Drew hits on Trish but she says no because she’s involved with someone. Vince comes in and isn’t exactly cool with Drew being around Trish. More PPV plugging ensues and Vince says to promote the PPV, Drew should be in the Royal Rumble. Drew says sure why not.

Billy Gunn is worried about Chyna hurting her neck again in the next match.

Jericho says he proved Benoit wrong.

We recap Chyna vs. Ivory. The RTC (Ivory’s censorship group) hurt Chyna’s neck with a spike piledriver and tonight is about revenge. This forces us to sit through Chyna trying to be emotional.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Ivory

Ivory is defending here. Chyna immediately runs her over with a pair of clotheslines and a toss around by the hair. Stomping ensues and Chyna knocks her out to the floor. They head into the crowd so Chyna gorilla presses her right back to ringside. Back in and Steven Richards gets beaten up as well. In an ending to set up Wrestlemania, Chyna tries the Muta Handspring Elbow but hurts her neck (on the softest bump in the corner you’ll see in years) and Ivory gets the pin to retain.

Rating: D. Ivory was squashed until the end when she won off an injury. What are you expecting from a match like this? This was designed to get more attention on Chyna because no female could conceivably beat her, so making her Women’s Champion for her Playboy hype wouldn’t do much good. Nothing to see here at all unless you’re a fan of Chyna in leather.

Chyna gets looked at by Lawler, Gunn and medics, resulting in a stretcher job.

Trish and Stephanie run into each other and still don’t get along. I can’t decide if Chyna or Stephanie is a worse actress.

Drew Carey gets some gear and talks to Kane. Nothing funny is said and much glaring ensues.

Low Down, as in Headbanger Mosh and D’Lo Brown doing an Arab comedy gimmick (don’t ask) is told that the Rumble spot they won earlier on Heat will be going to Drew Carey. See, THIS is a good use of a celebrity. Who cares if Mosh or Brown isn’t in the Rumble? Carey isn’t exactly a huge star, but he’s more interesting than either of those two. He promotes his PPV, the WWF gets some publicity, life is good.

Fans at WWF New York talk about the world title match.

HHH breathes a lot.

We recap Angle vs. HHH. Angle is on the roll of a lifetime to begin a career, having won the title from the Rock and defended it against Undertaker. HHH got the shot through some corruption and says he’s allowed Angle to be champion this long. Trish is playing both sides of the field, being in Kurt’s corner tonight but obviously sleeping with Vince, who is on HHH’s side at the moment. Stephanie couldn’t act, but dang she looked good in leather pants while she argued with Trish.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending. They trade wristlocks to start with Angle taking it to the mat before HHH takes it to the corner. A clothesline puts HHH on the floor as things slow down early. Back in and Angle escapes a suplex and hits three of his own for a near fall. HHH bails tot he floor and gets punched for his efforts, but he manages to send Angle into the barricade to slow things down.

Back in and HHH takes Angle to the mat which isn’t likely his best option. Since it’s a HHH match, we go old school with an Indian Deathlock. A dragon screw leg whip puts Angle down again but as he loads up another one, Angle takes him down with an enziguri for two. Kurt comes back with a whip to send HHH over the corner and out to the floor. This is slow to start but they have a ton of time.

They slug it out on the floor and HHH goes into the steps. Angle punches him around a bit more until a Stephanie distraction lets HHH crack Angle’s knee with a chair. Still good psychology so far and I’m digging the pace. We get our first Flair move as HHH hits a knee crusher onto the steps. They head back inside after about three minutes on the floor and HHH cranks on the knee even more.

Off to an inverted Indian Deathlock because we can’t quite reach the 80s yet. The facebuster gets two for HHH and it’s time for a bad looking Figure Four, although at least it’s on the correct leg. Trish interferes to try to break it up and we get a catfight on the Spanish announce table. Vince comes down to break it up as we completely stop watching the match. Vince carries Trish away but Stephanie pulls her off her dad’s shoulder. We haven’t seen anything in the ring for about two minutes now.

We FINALLY return to the match for a small package for two for Angle before it’s back to the knee. HHH gets kicked into the buckle and Angle grabs a DDT for two. A Russian legsweep looks to set up the moonsault but HHH hits him low to block. HHH busts out a Razor’s Edge out of the corner of all things for two. I’ve never seen him use that other than here. The Pedigree is countered into a slingshot into the post and Angle headbutts HHH in the crotch to boot.

Now the moonsault hits (I’m as shocked as you are) but he hurts his knee in the process. It only gets two as a result and Angle heads to the floor to walk his knee out. HHH dives off the apron and takes out Hebner by mistake. Angle goes into the post and we head back in where Angle runs the ropes (selling the knee? What’s that?) for an armdrag off the top. Angle tries to get Hebner up but HHH rams Angle into Hebner, sending Earl into the steps as a result.

HHH grabs the belt but Angle counters into an overhead belly to belly. Now Kurt gets the belt but HHH blocks into a Pedigree for no cover. Austin runs out and beats on HHH before hitting him in the face with the belt. He throws Hebner back inside but Angle is still down. A Stunner puts the bloody HHH down and Angle gets a VERY delayed pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was good but the overbooking brings it way down. Basically you have two matches here with the dividing line being the Vince/girls stuff. The match was starting off as a great psychological battle and it turned into an Attitude Era main event which it just didn’t need to be. This was disappointing after the way the match started.

Rikishi (#30) and Undertaker warm up for the Rumble.

Rock talks about how the Rumble is like a big bowl of jambalaya. As for Kane and Undertaker possibly being together, he doesn’t really care if they want to give each other a box of chocolates or kick each others’ faces in, because Rocky is throwing them both out. It could come down to Rock vs. Bull Buchanan, Rock vs. Perry Saturn, or Rock vs. Steve Austin, but either way he’s going to Wrestlemania. Rocky was feeling it here.

Rumble hype video, where there are a legit high number of possible winners. Austin is the favorite but it’s not 100% as long as Rocky is in there. This is also one of the last years where they really pushed the idea that ANYONE could win.

Royal Rumble

Jeff Hardy is #1 and Bull Buchanan is #2. Bull charges into the ring and the beating is on fast. Jeff fights back and goes up top before hitting a headscissors. The intervals are two minutes again this year if you care about those kinds of things. They slug it out in the corner with no one getting an advantage until Matt Hardy is #3. Poetry in Motion and a double clothesline quickly dispatch Bull, so the Hardys fight for a while.

The clock starts so the Hardys stop brawling as Faarooq is #4. Things don’t go any better for Faarooq than they did for Buchanan, resulting in a Twist of Fate and Swanton to knock him out as well. Jeff poses and Matt tries to dump him, resulting in some friction. Matt wins a slugout but gets caught by a Whisper in the Wind. Drew Carey is #5 and he wisely stands at ringside as the Hardys eliminate each other off the corner.

Drew is the only one left standing and the crowd seems amused. Then Kane is #6. JR: “Oh my God oh my God oh my God.” Drew begs the Hardys to get back in as Kane stalks him. After about a minute, Kane gets in and Drew offers a handshake and then cash. Kane grabs Drew by the throat until Raven is #7. Drew wisely eliminates himself, high fives some fans and bails. This was perfectly fine as he was in there like 3 minutes and gave us a decently funny moment. Also he seemed to enjoy being there which is more than I can say for most celebrities. Good stuff.

Anyway, Raven pounds on Kane with a kendo stick and a fire extinguisher blast. Al Snow jumps the gun at #8 to pound on Raven who eliminated him recently. Snow legally comes in a few seconds later with trashcans and lids, followed by a bowling ball which goes into Raven’s crotch. Big gasp from the crowd for that one. JR: “It looks like a hurricane has blown through New Orleans.”

Snow and Raven pound away on Kane with everything they can find before FINALLY taking him down with a double drop toehold into a trashcan. Perry Saturn is #9 and goes after Kane’s knee which is pretty stupid in a battle royal. Everyone takes their shots at Kane and some triple teaming finally gets him to his knees. Steve Blackman with his hardcore fighting sticks is #10 as the hardcore segment continues.

Things slow down a bit as they are known to do in hardcore matches until Grandmaster Sexay is #11. Kane finds a trashcan and explodes, eliminating everyone in about thirty seconds. Honky Tonk Man, Lawler’s second straight relative, is #12. He brings his guitar and starts to sing until Kane destroys the guitar over his head and gets his sixth elimination in a row.

Kane is standing tall so here’s the Rock at #13 for our first big showdown. Rock goes off with punches and a jumping clothesline but Kane blocks the elimination attempt. Rock keeps pounding but runs into a big boot to put him down. Goodfather is #14 and Rock eliminates him after two punches. Kane pounds him down again, prompting JR to say “Kane is a carnivore chewing on a big piece of Rock Burger.” Lawler: “…..Rock Burger?” Tazz is #15 and lasts even less time than Goodfather.

Rock and Kane slug it out for a bit until Rock hits a Samoan Drop. Both guys are down until Bradshaw is #16. He’s cool with fighting both guys and hits the Clothesline on Rock. Rock comes back with the spinebuster but Kane clotheslines Rock down to take over again. Albert is #17 to keep up the size and power trend. Albert and Bradshaw pair off as do the other two guys but we can’t get an elimination.

Hardcore Holly is #18 as Albert hits the chokebomb on Bradshaw. A bicycle kick from Albert puts Kane down in a pretty impressive looking move. Rock tries do dump Kane but the dude in the mask stays in. K-Kwik (R-Truth) is #19 and is immediately slammed down by Bradshaw. Nothing of note happens until Val Venis is #20. The ring is getting full now with Kane, Rock, Bradshaw, Albert, Holly, K-Kwik and Venis.

Rock powerslams Kwik down and William Regal is #21. He also beats up Kwik who isn’t having a good night so far. Nothing of note happens again until Test is #22. He immediately knocks out Regal before pounding away on Albert. Big Show makes his return from a trip to OVW to try (and fail) to lose weight. He clotheslines Test out and dumps Kwik as well. Everyone not named Rock gets chokeslammed as Rock kicks Show low and eliminates him for the second year in a row.

As Crash Holly is #24, Big Show seemingly turns heel and chokeslams Rock through the announce table. Everyone goes after Kane and Undertaker is #25, meaning it’s finally time to get rid of some of these guys. The Brothers clear the ring other than the two of them and Rock left on the floor. The tall guys stare each other down and Scotty 2 Hotty is #26. Not exactly the brightest guy in the world, Scotty gets inside and is gone in about 45 seconds.

Austin is #27 but HHH runs out to avenge the earlier interference. Rock climbs in as the Brothers watch Austin get beaten up on the floor. Austin is busted open as Taker beats on Rock off camera. Billy Gunn is #28 to save Rock for some reason. Taker DDTs Rock down as HHH leaves. Haku, as in Meng, the reigning WCW Hardcore Champion, is #29. He goes right for Taker and pounds him into the corner and everyone pairs off. Rikishi is #30, giving us a final group of Rikishi, Haku, Rock, Austin, Undertaker, Kane and Billy Gunn.

Rikishi gets in a fight with Austin on the floor and everyone is in the ring now. Austin dumps Haku as Taker ERUPTS on Rikishi. A chokeslam puts Rikishi down but a pair of headbutts go badly for the Dead Man. Rikishi superkicks Undertaker out in a pretty big upset. As impressive as that was for him, he tries the Banzai Drop on Rock and deserves the elimination he gets.

We’re down to four with Kane, Austin, Rock and Gunn. Gee I wonder which one is going out first. Gunn escapes the Stunner and hits the Fameasser on Austin but gets thrown out anyway a few seconds later. Rock DDTs Kane down as Austin chills in the corner. Rock and Austin lock eyes and the fight is on. That’s Wrestlemania people. The spit punch drops a weakened Austin but he escapes the Rock Bottom. The Stunner hits but Austin stops to go after Kane and charges into a Rock Bottom.

Kane gets back up and gets sent through the ropes by Rock, leaving Rock vs. Austin for the moment. They slug it out some more and fight for an elimination, but Kane comes back in and dumps Rock in a shocker. That also gives Kane the record for most eliminations in a Rumble at 11. Austin kicks Kane low to put both guys down and Kane bails to the floor. Kane brings in a chair but walks into a Stunner. About four chair shots and a clothesline send Austin to the main event of the best show ever.

Rating: B+. It’s not as good as last year but it was awesome for the most part with some BIG star power out there. They did a great job of keeping you guessing until the end as Rocky winning here was a very legitimate possibility. Austin is back from his surgery and back where he was before, which is exactly what he needed to do. Very good Rumble with some nice surprises.

Overall Rating: A. While it’s not quite as great as last year, this is pretty easily the second best Rumble so far. The ladder match is excellent and the Rumble is quite good as well. The world title match is great too and there’s a solid opening tag match on top of that. The Women’s Title match sucks but it’s less than four minutes long. Great show again, but things would be coming down soon.

Ratings Comparison

Dudley Boys vs. Edge and Christian

Original: B-

Redo: B

Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

Original: A

Redo: A+

Ivory vs. Chyna

Original: N/A

Redo: D

Kurt Angle vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: B

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A

I’m surprised that I liked it that much less last time. Still a great show.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/20/royal-rumble-count-up-2001-drew-carey-could-go-to-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the year of Austin and for once, the WWF is looking good going forward as the debacle that was the main event of Starrcade has caused WCW to hit a brick wall. The main event tonight is Shawn defending the title against Taker because he didn’t want to face Owen Hart, the most logical opponent. Also there’s the Rumble, which is obvious of a winner as there’s been in years, but in this case that’s ok. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the two main matches as you would expect. The rest of the card doesn’t mean much anyway.

Mike Tyson is in a skybox.

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

This is during Goldie’s midlife crisis/PAY ATTENTION TO ME phase. These two had a great match at Clash of the Champions so maybe this won’t suck. Goldust jumps him as Jerry is glad the gold one is in men’s clothing again. Vader shrugs off the shots to the back and chases Goldust to the floor. Vader rams him into Luna as we hear about Austin not being here yet. Goldust is sent into the steps as Vader keeps control.

Back in and Luna trips Vader up, finally allowing Goldie to get in a clothesline. Another clothesline puts him down and Goldust works on the leg a bit. Goldie drops a middle rope elbow to the ribs and we head back to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps so Luna can choke him a bit before we head back in. Goldust pounds away again but stops to kiss Vader. I may not be a pro wrestler, but I know better than to kiss a guy called the Rocky Mountain Monster.

Vader kills him with a clothesline and suplexes Goldust down before getting two off a splash. Vader loads up the Vader Bomb but a low blow stops him cold. Another clothesline puts Goldie down again and Vader sits on his chest. He loads up the Bomb again and despite Luna jumping in his back, Vader drops it anyway and crushes Goldust for the pin.

Rating: D. The place popped for the ending which did look cool, but other than that this was a messed up match. Goldust in this gimmick didn’t really work because at the end of the day, he’s still boring old Dustin Rhodes working the same standard style. It’s not horrible but it’s not a good choice to have on a PPV.

Austin gets here and tells Cole to park his truck. Southern Justice (the heel Godwinns) follow him, presumably to jump him.

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Minis here with Sunny as the referee. Max Mini (more famous as Mascarita Sagrada) is by far the most famous of these guys as he’s about 4 and a half feet tall but can move around very quickly. Nova and Tarantula start things off with Tarantula (on the heel team) being way bigger. Nova takes him down with some headscissors before it’s quickly off to Battalion (military themed guy) vs. Max. Max armdrags him to the floor which brings in Torito, meaning we’re in lucha rules (meaning sending someone to the floor means another member of your team can come in without an actual tag).

Torito can actually get his head over the top rope, meaning he’s just under the size of Rey Mysterio. Mosaic comes in and gets caught in a gorilla press and a release flapjack. A second flapjack attempt is caught in a wrist drag to send Torito to the floor and it’s off to Tarantula. That goes nowhere so here’s Battalion again. The fast tags continue as here’s Nova vs. Torito already.

They both hit the floor so Mosaic speeds things up against Battalion again. Mosaic spins him around again a few times before it’s back to Mini vs. Tarantula. Max gets caught in a spinebuster but goes up top almost immediately for a delayed rana. Max sends him to the floor and Tarantula backs off. Back in and Torito hits a Mafia kick to the back of Max’s head and a chop puts him down again.

For no apparent reason Sunny picks Max up so he can dropkick the villains. I can only assume Sunny is there to give the fans anything to care about. Mosaic and Battalion go to the floor as does Torito so Max can hit his big dive. The others dive on them as well and it’s a big pile on the floor. Back in Max rolls up Torito for the pin.

Rating: C. I’m going with a C because I have no idea what else to go with. I don’t know who these people are, I have no idea why I should care, and I might have seen these guys twice other than this (aside from Max). These matches are really hard to get into because there’s nothing to them. Much like a lot of the luchador matches in WCW had the same issue: why should I care about these people?

The Nation goes to attack Austin but only find an Austin foam finger.

The McMahons are in Tyson’s sky box.

We recap Shamrock vs. Rock. Shamrock has charged through the Nation to get this shot at the unofficial leader of the team. Mark Henry joined the Nation to save Rock from Shamrock less than a week ago.

The Nation argues over which of them will win the Rumble. Rock says the fans of course want to know what he thinks of Clinton and Paula Jones, so he tells the President not to lie down with dogs or you might get fleas. This joke would be done way better over the next few weeks.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Rock is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Rocky trying to get a cheap shot in the corner. Both guys shove the other into the corner and Shamrock blocks a shot to the face before hitting one of his own. They run the ropes a bit until Shamrock kicks him in the chest and knocks the champion out to the floor. Back in and Rock pounds away a bit before hitting a corner clothesline. Ken comes back with some clotheslines of his own but the standing clothesline is countered into a hot shot for two.

They’re trying to get out of first gear here but it’s really not working that well. The champ pounds on him in the corner and but gets caught in a fisherman’s suplex for two. Back to the floor with Shamrock going into the steps and then back into the ring. The spinning DDT gets two for Rock and it’s off to the chinlock. Rock tries the spinning DDT again but gets caught in a northern lights suplex for two instead.

Shamrock pounds away some more and gets two off a powerslam. The Nation comes out and sneaks Rocky some knuckles which go upside Ken’s head for two. Rock hides said knuckles in Shamrock’s trunks, just before getting belly to bellied for the pin and the title. Keep that in mind of course.

Rating: D+. Rock would get better, but at the end of the day this didn’t work that well. It was mainly punching with both guys trying to throw in a move here or there. This feud never quite worked as well as they were shooting for I don’t think and with Rocky holding the title forever, it didn’t do Shamrock much good either.

Post match the referee finds the knuckles and reverses the decision. The referee is beaten up very badly for his efforts.

A Coliseum Video Exclusive from “moments later” show a clean and dry Shamrock in jeans attacking the Rock.

Los Boricuas attack someone who they think is Austin but find one of the Disciples of Apocalypse. Brawling ensues.

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws, which is old school vs. new with the Outlaws defending the titles. The Outlaws put a big old beating on the LOD and tonight is their return.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

The Outlaws make fun of the 49ers who lost in the NFC Title game recently to the Packers. The LOD says that Animal’s back is fine and they’re putting the Outlaws on ice tonight. The Outlaws jump the challengers which goes badly in a hurry, as Animal powerbombs the Dogg. The champions try to walk out but get thrown back in so we can start with Hawk (who had one mohawk shaved off earlier in this feud) vs. Roadie.

Off to Animal as Road Dogg’s mouth is bleeding. The pounding continues so here’s Hawk for his one wrestling move in the neckbreaker. Gunn gets the tag and Hawk hits a freaking Lou Thesz Press of all things so he can pound away some more. Animal powerslams both Outlaws down and it’s off to a reverse chinlock on Gunn. Hawk comes in for his second surprise move of the match in an STF.

That goes nowhere so it’s back to Animal, who is tripped up by Roadie. They head outside where Animal is sent into the steps to finally switch the momentum. Hawk gets double teamed in the ring but clotheslines both Outlaws down (Animal is still legal) but charges into the post. Dogg finds some handcuffs and attaches Hawk to the post, making it a handicap match. Animal makes a comeback with a double clothesline, but Dogg hits him with a chair for the DQ.

Rating: D. So with an injury AND his partner tied up on the floor, Animal STILL couldn’t lay down for a pin? Seriously? This match sucked and would have been just slightly better on Raw with less time. The LOD was nothing at this point while the Outlaws were finally starting to turn some heads. Until this point though, they were two jobbers with the titles who kept escaping with them. Brighter days were coming.

The Outlaws destroy Animal until Hawk snaps the handcuffs to make the save.

Some fan wins the Austin truck.

We recap the build up to the Rumble. Basically, everyone knows Austin is going to win and EVERYONE else in the Rumble is trying to stop him but not one has been able to slow him down at all. The only difference here: the fans were eating this stuff up with a spoon.

Royal Rumble

Cactus Jack is #1 and Chainsaw Charlie (Terry Funk) is #2. The intervals are supposed to be two minutes again this year but they would wind up being closer to 90 seconds. Terry brings his chainsaw into the ring so Cactus throws in a bunch of chairs. The referee finally gets the saw out and they pound on each other with chairs. Cactus hits Funk in the head with one, then hands the chair to Funk so he can return the favor. These two aren’t exactly normal if you didn’t catch that.

Tom Brandi is #3 and lasts about ten seconds. Terry punches Jack down but can’t piledrive him on a chair. Cactus suplexes him through two chairs but can’t put him out. Rock is #4 and both hardcore guys are down. Rock pounds on Terry in the corner but Cactus blasts him with a trashcan and the double beating begins. Cactus puts the can over Rock’s head and they pound away on him, knocking him through the ropes and out to the floor. Funk hits Cactus low as Mosh is #5.

Mosh and Funk pair off as do the other two guys. Funk (the announcers are calling him that too) tries a moonsault but it winds up being more of a headbutt than a splash. Phineas Godwinn is #6 and helps Rock beat up Mosh. Not much happens for a bit until 8-Ball of the DOA is #7. Jack misses a charge and Funk backdrops him out to empty the ring out a bit. Apparently someone who might have been Ken Shamrock has attacked Austin.

Funk barely hangs onto the rope to avoid elimination until Blackjack Bradshaw (yes that Bradshaw) is #8 and looking as muscular as you’ll ever see him look. We talk about Mike Tyson while things slow down a bit until Owen Hart is #9. Jeff Jarrett, the NWA North American Champion at the time in a strange invasion angle, attacks Owen on his way in. Yeah this is what Owen gets for not bolting to WCW after the Montreal Screwjob. Yes I know he was under contract but you know Vince couldn’t hold him to it in that situation. Hart can’t get in the ring yet.

Steve Blackman is #10 and he has a hairy chest. 8-Ball piledrives Funk as there are way too many guys in the ring right now. Since people seem content to just tease eliminations on the ropes, no one is eliminated until D’Lo Brown is #11. Rock DESTROYS Blackman in the corner before getting in a fight with his Nation teammate D’Lo. Kurrgan, still a psycho monster at this point, is #12.

Thankfully he gets rid of some people like Mosh and….that’s about it for now. Dang it clear the ring out a little bit already. You’re a monster Kurrgan. Go destroy some villager. Marc Mero is #13, giving us a pop for Sable. Mero pounds away on Blackman in the corner but Kurrgan dumps Steve. Bradshaw pounds on Kurrgan as Rock teases not stomping his teammate before kicking away.

Ken Shamrock is #14 and he immediately kicks Kurrgan down. A big gang takes out Kurrgan as Rock hits the People’s Elbow (not yet named) on Funk. Thrasher is #15, giving us Funk, Rock, Phineas, 8-Ball, Bradshaw, Owen (not in the ring), Brown, Mero, Shamrock and Thrasher, or as they’re collectively known, WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. Still nothing happens and Mankind is #16, confusing the announcers and immediately punching Funk out.

Shamrock finally gets his hands on the Rock as Mero asks Sable for praise. Goldust is #17 in a silver bodysuit with a thong painted on. A minute or so later he puts out Mankind but there are still way too many people out there. Jeff Jarrett is #18 and Owen runs in to beat him down. A spinwheel kick puts Jeff down, followed by Owen skinning the cat and dumping Jeff. Honky Tonk Man is #19 as HHH (on crutches) and Chyna come to the ring. Rock dumps Shamrock to complete Ken’s humiliation tonight.

HHH gets on the apron and cracks Owen with his crutch to knock Hart out as well. Ahmed Johnson is #20, looking as bored as I can remember a wrestler looking in a long time. WAY too many people in the ring again. Mark Henry of the Nation is #21 and JR says Henry is “handling the big Johnson.” There’s no #22 which was supposed to be Skull, but he was jumped earlier remember.

Johnson is dumped out and he still doesn’t look like he cares. He would be gone next month anyway. Phineas is out after a ridiculous 28 minutes. On top of being in too long, he accidentally kicks a referee in the head on the way down, giving him a legit concussion. Kama Mustafa is #23 to give the Nation four members at the moment. We’re just waiting for Austin at this point.

FINALLY the glass shatters at #24 and the roof goes off the place. Austin comes in through the crowd because he’s got ten people waiting on him as he comes in. There go Mero and 8-Ball and things slow down AGAIN, because we need at least ten people in the match at all times for some reason. Henry Godwinn is #25 and nothing happens. Savio Vega is #26, but since we STILL don’t have enough people in the ring at the moment, he brings in the other three Boricuas to beat on Austin.

Thankfully Austin beats them out quickly but doesn’t eliminate anyone. Faarooq is #27 to give us the entire Nation in the ring. He goes right for the other Nation members though as his face turn continues. Not that anyone cares mind you but he is indeed turning. Austin and Rock tumble through the ropes through the floor to brawl a bit because that’s what those two guys do.

Dude Love is #28 to complete the running joke of the match. He immediately puts out Bradshaw as Goldust is on the floor but not eliminated. You can’t see most of the mat because of how many people are in the ring at the moment. Austin pounds on Rock even more with Rock falling to the floor again. Chainz of DOA is #29 as Faarooq puts Brown out. More brawling ensues until Vader completes the field at #30. This gives us a final group of….hang on I need a breath first…..Rock, Thrasher, Goldust, Honky Tonk Man, Mark Henry, Kama, Austin, Henry Godwinn, Vega, Faarooq, Dude Love, Chainz and Vader, or THIRTEEN PEOPLE.

Vader immediately pounds on Goldust and dumps Honky a few seconds later. Austin dumps Thrasher after an insanely too long 28 minutes. Austin puts out Kama to finally clear the ring out a bit. There goes Vega at Austin’s hands as well before Goldust dumps Vader. Godwinn goes out as well before Faarooq puts out Henry. We’re down to Rock, Austin, Love and Faarooq as Chainz was put out by Austin off camera.

The Nation members are thrown together and Rock gets hit by Sweet Shin Music and the double arm DDT. Austin hits Dude low and Faarooq throws Love out. Rock puts out Faarooq to give us Austin vs. Rock. They slug it out and Rock is thrown to the apron. Austin is fine with Stunning him and throwing him out to go on to Wrestlemania where he would claim his destiny.

Rating: D+. Austin was awesome as he always was in 1998, but the rest of this match pretty much sucked. As I said over and over, there were way too many people in there for the most part. Also you had WAY too many people getting time they didn’t deserve. I mean did anyone need to see Phineas, 8-Ball, Bradshaw, D’Lo Brown and Thrasher all getting over 28 minutes? Not much to see here other than Austin and Foley’s funny bit.

Tyson celebrates “Cole Stone” Steve Austin winning the Rumble.

We recap Shawn vs. Undertaker. Basically they feuded extensively in the fall but then after Montreal, Shawn didn’t want to face Owen for a fear of him trying to legit hurt him. Therefore they rehashed Undertaker vs. Shawn for the title here in a casket match. Most of the video here is about the first Cell match, which is still amazing stuff. Oh and one more thing: DX (still just three people at this point) attacked Taker on Raw but Kane had saved his brother, uniting with him for the first time ever. That was six days ago, and remember that a certain Vince Russo is booking.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Like I said, Shawn is defending and this is a casket match. Taker throwing the lights back on makes Shawn jump out of the ring. It’s a brawl to start and Taker immediately grabs Shawn by the throat. Shawn punches his way out of it but jumps into another choke by Taker. An attempt at putting Michaels in the casket doesn’t work, but a backdrop that put Michaels out of action for four and a half years by slamming his spine onto the casket does work.

Shawn slowly gets up and is kicked into the casket but he immediately bounces out. We head back in with Taker missing an elbow but hitting Old School. Shawn gets whipped into the corner for the Flair Flip to the floor, which is probably the last move he needed to do at this point. Back in and Shawn dives into a powerslam but Taker still can’t slam the lid shut. Shawn comes out throwing powder and manages to get a breather. Taker is sent knees first into the steps and Shawn smashes the challenger’s back with the steps.

A piledriver on the steps actually works for Shawn but he’s got a broken back and can’t follow up. HHH whacks Taker with the crutch (where is Owen if he’s so angry?) as Shawn stays in full control. Back in and a jumping back elbow puts Taker down but he fights out of the casket. Shawn neckbreakers Taker before putting on a sleeper which is eventually countered into a Saito Suplex.

The forearm from Shawn sets up the nipup which sets up the top rope elbow. He must be either high as a kite on painkillers or on a huge adrenaline rush to be able to have a match like this at this point. The superkick knocks Taker out cold but Shawn is Shawn and stops for a crotch chop. Taker grabs him by the balls and we head back inside for the beating Shawn deserves. Another Flair Flip sets up the big boot, but Taker misses a clothesline and lands in the casket.

Shawn drops an elbow into the casket, closing the lid on both guys. Cool spot actually. Shawn crawls out but in a semi famous shot, Taker pulls him back into the casket, closing it with both guys inside again. Back in and Undertaker hits one of the biggest chokeslams he’s ever hit followed by a JUMPING TOMBSTONE into the casket. The Outlaws and the Boricuas run in as we reenact Royal Rumble 1994, but here comes Kane to save the day. By save the day, naturally I mean turn on Undertaker and shut him in the casket to keep the title on Shawn and end the match.

Rating: B. Considering Shawn’s back was literally broken in half during the match, this is a pretty awesome fight. When Taker gets ticked off and wants to hurt somebody, he can lay a beating out like few others in the world. Shawn struggling through a match in this condition is nothing short of great, and the fact that he survived Wrestlemania like this as well is perhaps the greatest physical accomplishment of all time.

Post match Kane nails the casket shut and hacks at it with an ax. He pours gasoline inside and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE to end the show. Taker of course would disappear from the casket once it was opened up.

Overall Rating: D. Good main event aside, this was a REALLY dull show overall. 1998 would wind up being an awesome year, but this wasn’t the best start to it in the world. We saw a lot of the relics of the bad times here, but Austin was coming and there was absolutely nothing WCW could do to stop him. This wasn’t a good show at all, but it was a necessary evil to get us to the glory days.

Ratings Comparison

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Original: B-

Redo: D

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Original: B-

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

….what in the world was I on back then?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1998-austin-isnt-a-lock-to-win-please-believe-us/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 5, 2015
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Booker T.

It took awhile to get here but we’re finally into Royal Rumble season. The big story from last week (biggest out of many that is) was the return of the Authority, after a grand absence of about a month. Now that they’re back they can oppose Daniel Bryan as he tries to make it to Wrestlemania to take the World Title off the corporate backed champion. Well it worked the first time so why not now? Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap from the end of last week with Rollins setting the stage for the Authority’s return by threatening to cripple Edge. I still have issues with a simple “I respect you” making up for all of Cena and Edge’s issues.

Opening sequence. We haven’t had one of those in forever.

The roster is in the ring and around ringside to open the show. Cena would like to apologize for what’s coming, because he had to go back on his word and bring the Authority back last week. He thought he could slide in at the last second like Superman and save Edge but he just wasn’t sure. Now the Authority is back, but 2015 is going to be…..cut off by the Authority’s music. Cole: “Stephanie McMahon on the left, HHH on the right.” In case you thought HHH had become a woman you see.

Stephanie hopes we all had a great new year and HHH knows we were all begging for them to come back. He mocks the guest GM’s and praises Seth Rollins for ensuring their return. Rollins tells Cena Happy New Year but HHH has a surprise for him: he’s officially added to the WWE World Title match at the Royal Rumble, making it a triple threat with Lesnar defending against Rollins and Cena.

That brings us back to Cena, because last week he showed that he knows what’s best for business. Stephanie declares tonight John Cena Appreciation Night and Cena’s attendance is mandatory. As for everyone else, this is a new year, meaning they’ll all get what they deserve. That means Ziggler is up first and will be defending the Intercontinental Title against Bad News Barrett. I see no reason why the entire roster had to be out there, but they’re out of the opening segment at just 8:14.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Bad News Barrett

Barrett is challenging due to Barrett having to vacate the title due to an injury. The champ nails a dropkick to start but tries to get too high in the corner and takes a kick to the ribs. We’re in a chinlock less than two minute in, meaning I don’t see this lasting long. Ziggler pops up and grabs a crucifix of all things to retain the title at 2:38.

Barrett destroys Ziggler post match and sends him into the and steps over and over. Cue Corporate Kane to say the Authority forgot to mention that this match is 2/3 falls. Ziggler is barely able to get up and Wasteland ties us up about thirty seconds in. The referee calls the trainers in before the third fall and we take a break. Back with Ziggler insisting he can continue but taking a boot to the face. Wasteland plants him again for two and Barrett puts him in the ropes for another boot.

Barrett cranks on the arms as Cole gets something as simple as Barrett’s hometown wrong (Prescott instead of Preston). We hit the chinlock on the champ but he fights out with a Stunner, followed by a swinging neckbreaker. The Fameasser doesn’t work but the Winds of Change gets two. I still really like that move. Barrett’s Bull Hammer misses and Dolph scores with a superkick for another near fall. Kane gets up on the apron and eats a superkick, only to have the Bull Hammer knock Ziggler cold to give Barrett the title back at 16:39 total, counting the breaks between the falls.

Rating: C. The match was good but it was almost all angle. Barrett getting the title back is fine and it makes him a five time champion, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up given his past experiences as champion. I’m curious to see where Ziggler goes from here, but again they protected him with the big beatdown leading to his loss. He’s looking like a bigger star now and stacking the deck against him is going to make that work as much as anything else.

We get our first John Cena great moment, starting on Smackdown, July 27, 2002 when he answered Kurt Angle’s open challenge and took him to the limit. The Undertaker endorsed him post match to really make it mean something.

Clip from last week of Big Show interfering to break up Rollins vs. Reigns. Show buried Reigns under the announcers’ table, only to have Reigns do the same to him on Smackdown. Reigns vs. Show again tonight.

Reigns doesn’t know what to expect tonight but he knows Big Show can expect a man faster than a speeding bullet, able to leap tall building in a single bound, and more powerful than a locomotive. Believe that.

Bray Wyatt asks Dean Ambrose about his new year’s resolution. Is it to become a better father or to get to know his imprisoned father? Well tonight he’ll get the chance, because tonight he’s going to be locked in an ambulance. Ambrose’s lunatic fringe will be forever locked inside his own nightmare. The devil is suffering and pain and tonight he walks beside Wyatt.

Here’s the Ascension for a chat. There have been a lot of dominant teams over the years, but they’ll demolish Demolition and throw the Road Warriors off the road. Oh what a rush? Oh what a JOKE. Welcome to the wasteland. JBL of course buries them by saying they couldn’t carry the Road Warriors’ bags and Booker calls them stupid.

Ascension vs. ???/???

Fall of Man in 41 seconds.

Lana and Rusev tell America to stay out of Russia’s business. How dare America disrupt Russia’s tradition and heritage? Only Vladimir Putin can bring this world to peace, and only Rusev is undefeated.

John Cena beat JBL to win his first World Title at Wrestlemania XXI.

Roman Reigns vs. Big Show

Show spears him down to start and steps over Reigns’ ribs. Some kicks have the ribs in even more trouble as the announcers do their job by reminding us that Reigns’ had surgery on his abdomen to put him out of action late last year. A hard knee to the face gets to more and Big Show gets back to stepping on the stomach. We hit the bearhug before Reigns fights back, only to have the Superman Punch blocked. They head to the floor and Show hits him with the steps for the DQ at 4:19.

Rating: F. Failure, for the simple reason that this feud MUST CONTINUE! WHY IS IT CONTINUING??? How can WWE sit there and validate keeping Reigns locked up with Big Show for months on end and think that it’s going to get him over? Just look at this match too: Big Show dominates, swats away Reigns’ big move, and then loses because he beats him up too badly. This was a Big Show squash until the ending, making this match an even bigger waste of time than it looked like on paper. They’re going out of their way to annoy fans at this point.

We recap the opening segment.

Natalya vs. Nikki Bella

Rematch from last week when Natalya lost in a minute. Tyson Kidd isn’t out here after possibly costing Natalya the match last week. Cue Paige, who started a feud with Natalya last night on Total Divas. Natalya shoves Nikki down to start but can’t grab the Sharpshooter. Instead Nikki blasts her in the face as Paige and Brie are about to get into it on the floor. Paige easily destroys Brie but the distraction lets Natalya roll up Nikki for the pin in 1:23.

Paige saves Natalya from a post match beatdown.

Ambrose doesn’t have any new year’s resolution other than beating Wyatt up and throwing him into an ambulance. This match is going to be brutal and end their feud once and for all. That’s the way Dean lives his life and it’s the way he’s ending Bray’s.

The commentators offer their condolences to the family of ESPN anchor Stuart Scott as he passed away yesterday.

Luke Harper vs. Erick Rowan

Noble and Mercury are guest referees. Rowan sends him into the corner to start but the referees get in his way. He nails Harper with a spinwheel kick but the referees argue over who will do the count. Rowan yells at them and eats the discus lariat for a fast count pin at 1:00.

The Stooges beat up Rowan post match, allowing Harper to hit another discus lariat.

We see Cena’s first night as an official member of the Raw roster. That’s the night he was officially anointed as the top star of the company.

The WWE Network is coming to the UK on January 19. Allegedly.

Alicia Fox comes up to Naomi in the back and says they’ll be friends after they’re on different sides in the mixed tag. Fox brags about being part of the Total Divas cast and talks down to Naomi for being off the show. She beats Naomi up and screams a lot until more of the cast comes up to stop her.

We recap Ambrose vs. Wyatt, which has been a series of hardcore brawls since Wyatt cost him the Cell match against Rollins.

Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambulance match where you have to throw your opponent in the ambulance to win. This is billed as the end of the story, which I don’t buy for some reason. They quickly fight tot he floor with Wyatt being sent over the announcers’ table and thrown into the crowd. They’re quickly up by the ambulance and Dean has a red cross table. Well of course he does. Bray comes back with a stretcher to the knees and they fight back down to ringside with Wyatt sending him knee first into the post.

Back from a break with Bray splashing Dean in the corner and tossing his hair around. I guess he’s a Kevin Nash fan. Sister Abigail is broken up and the Rebound Clothesline puts both guys down. Bray comes right back with a shot to the bad knee (because he’s smart like that) and they head to the floor again. Up to the ambulance and Dean is able to clothesline him off the stage for a nice spot. Bray sends him into the ambulance….where there’s a chair waiting. Dean pelts it at Wyatt’s head but of course the fans only want tables. I’m so sick of hearing that chant every single week.

Another clothesline drops Bray but the knee is too banged up for Dean to give it the full effect. Ambrose nails him with the back board from a stretcher before loading up the red cross table. He lays Bray on it….and looks at the ambulance. With the limp slowing him down, Dean gets on top of the ambulance and drops the elbow to drive Wyatt through the wood, with the table breaking so clean that it ruins almost the entire visual. Not that it matters as Bray hits Sister Abigail into ambulance door. Dean is still able to fight out though, only to take a slow motion Sister Abigail on the concrete to give Wyatt the win at 19:40.

Rating: B-. The violence was fun but this felt like it went on forever. I’m not really sure why am ambulance match is supposed to be the be all and end all of this feud. It wasn’t anything we haven’t seen them do a bunch of times, but at least Wyatt definitively wins the feud and can now move on to something else. Good brawl, but I’d have liked them to go on and do something new instead of the same old stuff in a different setting.

Time to insult the fans who still pay for regular pay per view.

Remember that opening segment? Well here it is again.

Usos/Naomi vs. Alicia Fox/Miz/Damien Mizdow

Another Total Divas match. The girls get things going with Naomi throwing Alicia around with ease before it’s off to Miz for a neckbreaker and chinlock on Jimmy. Mizdow gets the tag and is back out three seconds later before any contact. Does any of this sound familiar to anyone else? Miz ax handles Jimmy from the apron to the floor and it’s back to the chinlock. Jimmy finally escapes and makes the hot tag as everything breaks down. In the melee, Jimmy has to stop himself from running into Naomi, allowing Miz to roll Jimmy up with a handful of the tights for the pin at 4:12.

Rating: D. This show is dying before our eyes. The story is starting to drag as there’s really no reason for these people to be fighting anymore, other than the required crutch of a rematch that they just have to have. If they wanted to make things interesting they would have Fox get the new projects that were promised to Naomi to show her that Miz was lying to wrap things up, but something tells me the Naomi part is just going to be dropped.

WWE Network song.

Ryback vs. Seth Rollins

Wait a second as Kane comes out to make it a handicap match.

Kane/Seth Rollins vs. Ryback

Ryback runs into Kane’s uppercut to start but comes back with the Thesz Press and Warrior splash for one. Off to Rollins who bails in the face of a monster like a villain should. We get a Flair slam from the top and Kane is sent outside as well as we take a break. Back with Ryback fighting out of a chinlock but eating a dropkick from Rollins. Rollins chokes a bit and Kane puts on one of the worst chinlocks I can ever remember seeing. It’s like when you’re a kid and you do wrestling moves to your friends but you don’t know what you’re doing and it looks horrible, but this is a former World Champion doing it instead.

Ryback suplexes Kane down for a breather and nails Rollins with a nice spinebuster. The Stooges offer a distraction but Rollins takes the Meat Hook anyway. Kane breaks up Shell Shock but takes it himself, only to have Seth nail the Curb Stomp. He does it again for no particular reason and gets the pin at 11:54.

Rating: D-. END THIS ALREADY! This show has been dragging on and on for the last two hours and I have no idea who thinks this is a good idea. Rollins getting the pin makes sense but if all the fans pass out due to boredom, no one is going to care. Also, well done on giving Ryback the big promo last week and then jobbing him here. You could have at least made this Rollins and Rusev to help build the match, but instead let’s just get Kane out there.

Big E. vs. Adam Rose

Rose actually takes over to start and throws Big E. into the corner before slapping on a chinlock. Big E. makes his comeback but we’ve got masked men for the DQ at 1:50.

Big E. takes a powerbomb/Blockbuster combo and the masked men are Cesaro and Tyson Kidd.

Preview of tonight’s new episode of Countdown.

Here’s the Authority to introduce Cena for John Cena Appreciation Night at 10:58. We see the ending of last week’s show again and Stephanie calls Cena her hero. HHH says he thought Cena was horrible when he debuted and then he had to sit through all those years of hustle, loyalty and respect. Last week though, Cena changed his mind when Cena brought back the Authority. This ring is all that matters to HHH and before the night is over, a lot of people are going to appreciate John Cena (it didn’t make sense when he said it either).

HHH brings out Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler, none of whom have had a good night. He recaps how everyone joined Team Cena and now it’s time for the punishments: Rowan is suspended for thirty days, Ryback is suspended for sixty days, and Ziggler….has to wait while the Authority walks up the aisle in a conference about what to do. Their decision: they’re all fired. HHH: “LET’S HEAR IT FOR JOHN CENA!” Music plays, confetti and balloons fall, and Stephanie does a little dance to end the show.

Overall Rating: F+. The plus is only due to some good action when they could get away from the stories. This show was downright infuriating as they basically forgot everything interesting and entertaining from last week and took us back to the stupid Survivor Series fallout, which has now gone on longer than the build and pay per view itself. They were packing every single thing they could into this show and making sure that the fans had as little fun as possible.

Above all else though, this show lost me with how the announcers talked about Ascension. I know the team isn’t for everyone, but this company’s philosophy seems to be “let’s put every possible thing against the new guys and see how hard they’re willing to get it over.” Then when it fails, oh well it wasn’t the company’s fault for whatever reason. The announcers referred to the new team as stupid and basically called them worthless. I’m so glad they got a year as NXT Tag Team Champions only to be shot down like this a week after they debut.

That’s just part of the downside to this show. It just went on and on and kept feeling like they were trying to get on the fans’ nerves. And for what? To set up some big moment where the Authority is defeated? Again? As in after they were defeated at Wrestlemania and then again at Survivor Series? I’m supposed to care that they lose again, only to come back a few months later like nothing ever happened? This show drove me crazy and I gave up on it about an hour in. If this is the start of the Road to Wrestlemania, we’re in for a long, long ride.

Results

Bad News Barrett b. Dolph Ziggler – Bull Hammer

Ascension b. ???/??? – Fall of Man to #1

Roman Reigns b. Big Show via DQ when Big Show used the stairs

Natalya b. Nikki Bella – Rollup

Luke Harper b. Erick Rowan – Discus lariat

Bray Wyatt b. Dean Ambrose – Wyatt threw Ambrose in the ambulance

Alicia Fox/Miz/Damien Mizdow b. Naomi/Usos – Rollup with a handful of tights

Big E. b. Adam Rose via DQ when Cesaro and Tyson Kidd interfered

Seth Rollins/Kane b. Ryback – Curb Stomp

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: December 26, 2014
Location: Tyson Events Center, Sioux City, Iowa
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips, Michael Cole

It’s the show after Christmas which means that Hulk Hogan is still in charge tonight. All that means is he’ll make a match and say BROTHER a lot, but that’s at least better than some of the previous bosses this company has had. Other than that we’re still in the dull period before they start caring about the Rumble so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Hogan walking through the same Christmas set from Raw to open things up. I really wish they would mix those things up a bit more often. Anymore it’s just the same set from Raw but with blue as the main color. Switch things up a bit and make Smackdown feel more unique. Maybe they’ll do that when the show moves back to Thursdays.

Anyway, Hogan has something to tell us brother (1), he’s in charge tonight brother (2). We hear some of his fondest memories from being on Smackdown, including winning the Tag Team Titles with Edge, who will be hosting Raw with Christian on Monday. That’s another thing I wouldn’t mind seeing more of: plug those announcements. It’s simple and quick yet gets the word out there.

Hogan is about to go on but Rollins and the Stooges cut him off. Seth calls him a champion, a Hall of Famer and the embodiment of Wrestlemania. He asks for and receives a handshake before saying if Hogan keeps it up, they might start calling him the Seth Rollins of the 80s. Hogan may have been great, but he doesn’t belong in Rollins’ ring anymore. That’s a bit too far for our American hero, who says he’s running Smackdown tonight. Hogan: “So if you don’t mind brother (3)…” Rollins: “Well I do mind brother. AND DON’T YOU BROTHER ME!”

Seth talks about how great the Authority was for business but now they’ve been replaced by a sideshow act like Hogan. As the future of WWE, this is Seth’s business and he’d like Hulk to officially endorse him. After that, Hogan can get out of this ring because it’s almost 2015. Hulk isn’t sure Rollins is getting out of this ring alive if he keeps talking like that. He can think of several people who could lead this company into the future, like Dolph Ziggler for instance.

Cue Dolph, who calls Rollins the future. If you don’t believe that, just ask Seth because that’s all he talks about. Rollins says Ziggler just doesn’t get it. The future isn’t just a popularity contest and Rollins should just Curb Stomp him right in front of Hogan. How does that sound brother? Ziggler has been curb stomped before and keeps getting up, so what does Seth want to do about it brother?

Here’s Big Show to say that sometime you have to just use force, so now he’s going to come out here and knock out Hogan and Ziggler. This brings out Reigns who tells Show not to come through those ropes unless he wants to get hit in the mouth again, right in front of his wife and kids. Hogan makes the tag match main event and actually doesn’t drop a ninth brother (yes I counted) of the segment.

Kane vs. Ryback

Jobber entrance for Kane. We see Ryback sending Rusev running on Monday before things get going. Ryback fires off to start but runs into a boot to the…..shoulder I think to put him down. So Kane can’t even sell for ten seconds now? Cole crushes several dreams by confirming that Rose and the Bunny have split, partially due to the tombstones from Kane. Ryback grabs a spinebuster and loads up the Meat Hook but we’ve got Russians. He’s still able to escape the chokeslam though and hits the Meat Hook and Shell Shock for the pin at 2:10. Now THAT is what Kane should be used for more often than not.

Rusev gets in the ring for a staredown but Kane comes back in to chokeslam Ryback, setting up the Accolade. I’m still not sure who wins this feud, even though it should be obvious. That’s always a good sign.

After a break, Hogan runs into the Russians to tell Rusev that the US Title is on the line tonight. Giving champions almost no notice to defend their titles is the American way you see, BROTHER. And SISTER!

Alicia Fox vs. Naomi

They start fast with Naomi nipping up, only to eat a kick to the face for two. More speedy kicks get two for Naomi as Miz is watching from the back. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Alicia and we hit the chinlock. That goes nowhere so Naomi heads to the apron for a kind of Twist of Fate onto the top rope. Naomi gets tired of carrying Fox and kicks her in the head, setting up the split legged moonsault for the pin at 3:18. She even throws in counting the pin along with the referee because she’s kind of awesome.

Rating: C. I’m so glad that Naomi is getting an actual story instead of the usual stuff we’ve been seeing with the Divas for years. She’s an athletic freak and, in a description I wish I had thought of, the female Shelton Benjamin. No one in the division can keep up with her and unfortunately it means that WWE doesn’t know what to do with her. It’s good to see that they’ve given her some kind of a story though, because far too often the Divas’ stories revolve around just wanting the title or some catty story that makes them all look ridiculous.

We recap the matches Hogan set up on Raw.

Jimmy and Naomi have a badly scripted conversation about Jimmy beating Miz later tonight.

R-Truth vs. Adam Rose

Rematch from Monday where the Bunny was beaten up by Rose after he lost to Truth. Therefore, Rose comes out sans Bunny and doesn’t even do the fall, waving the Rosebuds off instead. Rose is much more aggressive here and takes Truth into the corner for some mule kick stomping. A nice snap suplex gets two on Truth and we hit the chinlock.

Phillips tries to bring up the incident on Halloween where Truth said the Bunny was the star of the team to set up this mini feud. Since that’s doing his job and keeping up continuity, JBL just buries him in response, saying how stupid the whole thing is. Back up and Truth makes his comeback, only to be sent into the post to set up the Party Foul for the pin at 2:07. Rose actually plays a decent heel, but his in ring work is still average at best.

Here are Rusev and Lana for a chat before the title defense. It’s a short one this time, basically saying Rusev will crush anyone before he faces. Cue his opponent.

US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rusev

It’s kind of amazing how Ambrose keeps getting these major matches despite barely ever winning anything. They take turns stomping each other down in the corner to start until Dean ties him in the ropes for chops and the running dropkick. A suicide dive drops Rusev again and Dean grabs a jackknife cover of all things for two.

The fans chant USA as Rusev runs Dean over and drops rapid fire elbows ala Hulk Hogan back in the day. You would think that the Russian imitating an AMERICAN would satiate the fans chanting USA but it doesn’t quite work that way. A chinlock stays on even shorter than usual but Rusev ties him in the ropes and hits a running Vader clothesline to the back knocking him out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with the champ holding a nerve hold before the fall away slam gets two. Ambrose actually escapes the Accolade attempt and avoids a charge, sending Rusev head first into the post. The Rebound Clothesline sets up the standing elbow (love that move) for two and Ambrose’s tongue is hanging out. They head outside with the champion going into the barricade, only to have Wyatt interfere for the DQ at 13:00.

Rating: C+. These matches are like a vacation: they’re fun while they last but you know you’re going to be disappointed by the ending. There was no doubt that it was going to end by countout or DQ because that’s how these things end in WWE. It’s a problem with how the company books its shows anymore but unfortunately it’s something you have to live with. As usual Dean looks good, but when was the last time he had a fall on a show that actually mattered? And no, Tribute to the Troops doesn’t matter.

Rusev leaves and Bray throws Dean over the timekeeper’s area, only to have Dean come up throwing chairs. About five are thrown into the ring and Bray bails as well. I have no idea where they’re going with this, but it’s modern WWE and a major gimmick match doesn’t end anything anymore.

Miz vs. Jimmy Uso

Cole plugs a new app where you’re a backstage assistant in WWE and solve problems which have nothing to do with anything happening in the ring. Levels include identifying a spot as fatty tissue, yelling at someone for not memorizing a script, trying to figure out what the heck the commentators are talking about and finding stronger ear plugs so HHH doesn’t hear the BORING chants.

Miz kicks him down to start but we get a quick chase scene around the ring. JBL, of course, is talking about fast food mascots. Jimmy can’t hit the running Umaga attack but eats a right hand from Jey. Naturally, that’s not a DQ. Back in and Miz begs off to offer more mainstream connections. The fans aren’t really happy with the match stopping for nearly a minute of Miz standing there with his hand out saying “come on let’s be Usos”, so Jimmy hits two superkicks and the Superfly Splash for the pin at 3:08.

Rating: D. I’m liking the idea of the Usos having some singles matches. Of course it shouldn’t lead anywhere because splitting them up for singles runs would be a terrible idea, but I like that they’re not just doing the same tag match every week. Imagine that: trying something else to keep things fresh for the bigger shows. There’s so much in WWE that is going right but at the same time the big problems are just so wrong.

Ascension is coming next week.

Goldust looks at an electric orb and sees that the new year will be……something we don’t get to hear as the ball shocks him. Stardust comes in to say it’s going to be his year.

Seth Rollins/Big Show vs. Roman Reigns/Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler and Rollins get things going as Cole recaps Survivor Series gets an achievement for recapping Survivor Series for the 200^th time. A quick hiptoss has Rollins down so it’s off to the power guys. Reigns can’t get things moving too fast thanks to a shoulder from Big Show. Like the masterful heel that he is, Rollins comes in when Roman is down to stomp away. Reigns is able to get back up though due to the power of wetter hair, allowing for the hot tag off to Ziggler.

The Stooges get involved, and somehow don’t get caught, by tripping up Ziggler as we take a break. Back with Dolph fighting out of a chinlock, only to be catapulted into the corner. The fans display their ventriloquism skills by chanting BIG SLOW without moving their mouths….or anything else for that matter. Reigns smiles at Show as the chant is getting annoying in a hurry. A few fans chant for Reigns but they’re quickly drowned out by BIG SLOW.

Show misses a charge and eats a Fameasser, setting up the hot tag to Reigns. Mercury breaks up the Superman Punch and Seth nails the low superkick for two. The fans chant for Reigns (again with the ventriloquism) and he backdrops out of a buckle bomb attempt. The chokeslam doesn’t work either and Dolph levels Big Show with a superkick, setting up the spear for the pin.

Nah I’m kidding. You know Big Show isn’t going to get pinned when there’s some hotshot with a future to take the fall for him. Rollins sends both opponents to the floor and suicide dives Reigns. Back in and Ziggler breaks up the springboard knee, setting up the spear to Rollins for the pin at 13:13.

Rating: C. The match was your standard main event tag (with another bad ending but I guess that huge fall over Show is supposed to make Reigns) but the chants were the most interesting part. Of course they were piped in, but I find it interesting that they seem more interested in playing down Big Show than playing up Reigns.

They were similar to the LET’S GO CENA/CENA SUCKS chants: yeah they’re against Cena, but they’re not for his opponent. The chants made this sound like it was all about Big Show with the few Reigns chants only lasting a few seconds compared to the near minute of Show chants. I’m not sure what to make of that.

Overall Rating: C-. Yet another worthless episode of Smackdown with whichever main eventers we have on hand being thrown into a tag team main event. The Ryback vs. Rusev showdown still looks good, though I’m not sure they can stretch it out for another four weeks. Other than that, there really isn’t much to talk about here. It’s another basic episode of the same show they’ve done every Friday for weeks now and I get less and less enthusiastic about it every time. Oh wait Kane actually took a fall. He’s been getting a bit better about that.

Results

Ryback b. Kane – Shell Shock

Naomi b. Alicia Fox – Split legged moonsault

Adam Rose b. R-Truth – Party Foul

Dean Ambrose b. Rusev via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered

Jimmy Uso b. The Miz – Superfly Splash

Roman Reigns/Dolph Ziggler b. Big Show/Seth Rollins – Spear to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

We’re up to another show which feels like they’re trying to drain as much blood from the stone of Survivor Series that they can squeeze out. Basically it’s a bunch of singles matches from people who were on the main event teams with gimmicks, more than one of which just do not need to happen. Also, since Lesnar shows up like once every three months, the main event is for Cena’s #1 contendership, but only Cena can leave with it. Is there any reason why this wasn’t the best looking show on paper? Let’s get to it.

The pre-show saw the New Day beat Goldust and Stardust. Would you really expect anything else happening here? That’s really all there is to say here, but I don’t mind the New Day so far. Kofi and Langston have talent and giving them anything to do is a thing idea for them.

The opening match was Luke Harper losing the Intercontinental Title back to Dolph Ziggler in a ladder match in Ziggler’s hometown. This was using the idea of “hit each other really hard with some big ladders” for about fifteen minutes and then have Ziggler win. It’s a great choice for a brawl, but here’s the problem with opening a show with something like this: it’s going to be hard to top. Someday I need to write up a piece on how to structure a card.

Anyway, Ziggler got the title back and that really shouldn’t have shocked anyone. It’s his match in his city (until tomorrow when he was billed from Hollywood, Florida) against a guy that hadn’t actually won a match since he won the title with help. The idea here was that the win elevated Ziggler, but when you think about it, he’s right back to where he was before he was added to Team Cena but now he’s the reason the Authority is gone. Winning the title really doesn’t elevate him any higher than the Survivor Series win did, so I’m not sure if they’re hitting their target on this one.

Earlier in the night, Miz told Naomi that she would be a Hollywood star if he and Mizdow left with the titles. That’s quite the idea, so of course Naomi played absolutely zero role in the title match. Miz hit one of the Usos with a Slammy for the DQ, meaning the story has to continue. They need to do something with Mizdow though because he can only do the same idea so many times before the time is over. I did hear a great idea for how they lose the titles: Mizdow is legal but Miz is down, so Mizdow lays down and takes the pin because Miz isn’t up yet.

The stairs match was the disaster everyone expected it to be. I’ll avoid ranting on Big Show winning again because I think I’ve covered that idea to death already. Here’s the major problem with this match though: why was it a stairs match? The gimmick didn’t get anyone to buy the show, it didn’t help either guy get over, it doesn’t have a history, and it made the match repetitive. There is such a concept as “less is more” and that’s what happened here. This should have been a wrestling match (with Rowan not getting pinned but that’s another story) to give the fans a break from the weapons.

Cena and Rollins had a long and overbooked yet good tables match. I’m not entirely sure what the point was in the tie midway through the match as it really didn’t do anything but extend the match. I guess it lets Rollins say he put Cena through a table but you don’t need the tie to do that. Reigns and Big Show coming down were fine but the match had too much going on. Also, on top of that, what did Rollins have to win here other than pride? Put the #1 contendership on the line or something, because without a title to fight over, it stops meaning much.

Nikki retained over AJ in another nothing match. Three notes here: first of all, Brie said that she’s fine with her sister because they’re family. That’s about as lame of an answer as they could have gone with and is code for “We changed the story. Get over it.” The other note is Nikki Bella ACTUALLY CHEATED to keep the title by using hairspray to blind AJ for the Rack Attack. You know, like a villain is supposed to do. If villains don’t cheat, it’s hard for them to be villains.

Third, to further illustrate how over managed the whole company is, the stuff sprayed in AJ’s eyes was originally called hairspray on WWE.com but they changed it to “an unidentified substance.” Here’s the thing: someone actually looked at that report on WWE.com, saw that it said hairspray, and said no no no it was just some substance.

1. What’s wrong with hairspray?

2. Why not just call it an unidentified substance in the first place?

3. Who in the freaking world cares that it wasn’t actually hairspray??? I know there are some nitpickers out there, but was there really someone out there freezing the screen and zooming in on it to see if it was really hairspray???

4. Who looked at the report and said “CHANGE THIS IMMEDIATELY!!!!”? I really want to know who is in charge of the “identifying what Nikki Bella uses to cheat to win matches” department at WWE.com.

5. Someone is being paid to change hairspray to unidentified substance. Remember that the next time you’re looking for a job.

Next up was Ryback vs. Kane in a chairs match. Here’s a quicker way to cover this one. Read this but substitute Kane for Big Show, Ryback for Erick Rowan, chairs for stairs and swap the winner.

The stairs match was the disaster everyone expected it to be. I’ll avoid ranting on Big Show winning again because I think I’ve covered that idea to death already. Here’s the major problem with this match though: why was it a stairs match? The gimmick didn’t get anyone to buy the show, it didn’t help either guy get over, it doesn’t have a history, and it made the match repetitive. There is such a concept as “less is more” and that’s what happened here. This should have been a wrestling match (with Rowan not getting pinned but that’s another story) to give the fans a break from the weapons.

Rusev b. Swagger Part 19.

Wyatt beat Dean Ambrose in the namesake match when a TV monitor blew up in Dean’s face so Bray could hit Sister Abigail. I’ll skip all the spots and get down to the message of this match: sometimes someone has to lose a match. Anymore WWE seems obsessed with finding ways for someone to slip on a banana peel to lose after dominating for most of the match. Sometimes you have to have someone win and someone lose without some big gimmick ending.

If you’re trying to elevate both guys, having one put up a heck of a fight but come up short isn’t going to kill them (see Cactus Jack vs. HHH in 2000 for proof) but having Ambrose lose like he did here and in the Cell make me roll my eyes and forget the rest of the match. Tell me: how many things do you remember about the match outside of the ending? It was a good match but no one is talking about anything but the ending and how stupid it made Ambrose look. Get the idea here?

Overall this show had too much thought put into it and the whole thing got screwed up. The chairs and stairs matches could have been wrestling matches and the main event being worth anything (#30 in the Rumble perhaps?) would have helped it a ton. At the end of the day, Lesnar and the title not being around is killing this company and they need to get the title off of him as soon as possible.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

Yeah I know a lot of people are doing something like this but it’s the best I’ve got.

http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-12-days-wrestling-christmas/32816/

Tribute to the Troops 2014
Date: December 17, 2014
Location: Columbus Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

It’s that special time of year when WWE gets to put in very little effort and bang their chests to brag about how amazing they are for doing something for the troops. Ignore the fact that they no longer go across the world to do these shows or even hold them in a military base anymore and enjoy meaningless matches, unnecessary musical performances and recorded cameos by celebrities who aren’t actually appearing in person. Did I mention this show has lost its shine for me in the last few years? Let’s get to it.

Will Ferrell, the Osbornes, Rachel Maddow, the Muppets, Michael Strahan, Kelly Ripa, Aaron Rogers, Bruce Willis, Stephen Colbert, a bunch of wrestlers and celebrities that I either don’t recognize or go too fast to type love the troops.

Here’s Hulk Hogan with an American flag, walking between some troops to open the show. Really, is there anyone else that should be doing something like this? He talks about how great it is to live in this country but gets cut off by Miz and Mizdow (minus Slammys and titles). Miz says you’re welcome to everyone here for portraying a marine in his signature role. When you think pillar of strength of the military, you think Miz.

This brings out John Cena to apologize for Miz, who is either drunk or has amnesia. When Cena thinks of toughness, he thinks of the armed forces. When he thinks of Miz, it’s something a whole lot more metrosexual. Like Ryan Seacrest for example. The Miz compares himself to Bob Hope and says dying children ask people to win one for the Miz. Cena of course doesn’t believe it and polls the fans on whether or not Miz is a big deal.

Miz laughs it off and says that it’s Hogan in the ring with Miz instead of him being in the ring with Hogan. He brings up the Wrestlemania XXVII loss and says he played a more convincing soldier than Cena ever could. The brawl is on and Mizdow ie left alone for his team. He mimes getting beaten up by Cena and dives over the ropes on his own in a funny bit.

This brings out Team Authority minus Rusev but plus Big Show because even specials need to have long opening segments. The beatdown is on but Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler come out for the save. Team Cena and Hogan stand tall in an actual feel good moment. Hogan has been the Real American for over thirty years and you have to have him here for something like this.

Angelina Jolie loves the troops and plugs her new movie Unbroken.

Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos

Goldust talks trash to Jey to start and eats an uppercut for his efforts. Off to Stardust who gets punched in the face as well before it’s off to Jimmy for a slam. Goldust gets in a cheap shot from the apron but Jimmy stops to dance. The Usos knock the Dusts to the floor for some big dives as we take a break. Back with Jey being sent to the floor for a stomping from Stardust as Cole talks about how amazing Fort Benning is.

Stardust works on an armbar before kicking Jey in the face for two. Goldust gets the same off a powerslam and we hit the chinlock. Jey fights up and makes the hot tag to his brother for some house cleaning. The Umaga attack stuns Stardust and the enziguri sends Goldust to the floor. There’s a big dive from Jey but Jimmy takes the Disaster Kick for two. Jimmy pops back up with a corkscrew dive for two more. Jey superkicks Stardust down and the double superkick sets up Superfly Splashes for the stereo pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it’s the same one we’ve seen half a dozen times now. The Usos continue to have great rhythm together which you can only find in actual brothers. The Dusts on the other hand are still falling apart, even though they’re staying sharp in the ring. I’d assume we’ll get to the split eventually, which I don’t hate as much as I used to.

Lester Holt loves the troops.

The cast of the Voice loves the troops.

Florida Georgia Line performs.

Tom Brokaw loves the troops.

Divas Battle Royal

All of the Divas are here in either Christmas themed attire or at least a Santa hat. It’s a brawl to start with Emma quickly being eliminated. Rosa and Summer have a dance off as the rest of the match just stops. Thankfully they get together and eliminate the pair but Cameron stops to check her compact. Naomi takes it away and holds it out, making Cameron stop to look at herself again, giving Naomi the easy elimination.

The Bellas throw Alicia out, leaving us with the Bellas, Paige, Naomi and Natalya. Paige busts out some mistletoe but the Bellas kick her to the floor. Naomi tries to jump over Nikki in the corner but gets planted with an Alabama Slam. Brie eliminates herself by missing a baseball slide, allowing Naomi to dump the other two out for the win at 3:45.

Rating: D+. This is there so the girls can look good in their outfits and nothing more. It wasn’t entertaining for the most part but thankfully they kept this very short. This is a tradition for the show and at the end of the day, it’s one of those things there for the fans and nothing more.

Video of the roster visiting the troops.

Sgt. Slaughter tells us to stick around.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Boot Camp match, meaning a military themed street fight. Sgt. Slaughter does the introductions for old times’ sake. Ambrose comes out in a camouflage hat to really suck up to the fans. It’s a brawl to start of course with Dean hitting his dropkick against the ropes. Bray comes back with a slam as we’re waiting on the weapons to come into play. Dean comes back with what looked like a bulldog to send Bray outside, setting up the suicide dive.

They head to the camouflaged posts before Dean hits him with what looked like a tool box. Since there aren’t enough weapons in the ring, Dean goes underneath to find some chairs, one of which he wedges in the corner. Bray comes back with a kendo stick shot and hammers away on Dean’s ribs. Some right hands get two on Ambrose as the announcers debate G.I. Joes.

We take a break and come back with Dean fighting out of a cravate but eating a right hand to the face. A big kendo stick shot gets two and Bray slowly kicks away. Bray misses a big shot though and Dean takes the stick away. Wyatt seems to like the idea but doesn’t like the beating Ambrose gives him as much. A White Russian legsweep and middle rope elbow with the chair get two for Dean so he starts looking for more toys. He picks a table but takes too long setting it up, allowing Bray to Rock Bottom Ambrose through the table for two.

Wyatt busts out another table but stops to get in Slaughter’s face, allowing Dean to get a breather. Slaughter takes off his boot as Dean comes back with the rebound clothesline. The steel toed boot comes into the ring and goes upside Bray’s head to knock him onto the table. Dean heads up top for the elbow through the table for the pin at 14:30.

Rating: C+. This was violent enough to be entertaining but the gimmick was just there to tie things together. In other words, this was a basic street fight with nothing special other than the last spot of the match. Nothing much to see here, but these two have done so much that it’s hard to find something new.

We recap the opening segment.

Jamie Fox and Cameron Diaz love the troops and plug their new movie Annie.

The Kardashians love the troops.

Here are Lana and Rusev to what should be better heat. She says the fans are lucky to be in the presence of the greatest US Champion of all time to make them a bit angrier. The fans shout Rusev down with the USA chant so Lana puts up the Putin photo. She issues something like an open challenge and here’s Daniel Bryan to interrupt and fire up the crowd all over again.

Bryan says the thing the Russians don’t understand about Americans is that they never back down. It doesn’t matter if you’re 5’5 like Bryan (that’s a bit low) or 7’2, Democrat or Republican, we fight no matter what. If Rusev and Lana don’t like that, they should go back to Russia. Lana laughs him off and Rusev invites Bryan out to the floor. Daniel asks if Rusev wants to do all this right in front of the troops. The thing about Americans is they’ll come from anywhere to defend their freedoms. A few troops start jumping the barricade and two repel from the ceiling to surround Rusev. Bryan gets in the ring but Rusev bails.

The vast of the Today Show loves the troops.

Larry the Cable Guy loves the troops.

Florida Georgia Line performs again.

Team Cena goes over their game plan (an actual piece of paper labeled “game plan”).

Video on Hire Heroes.

Ryback/John Cena/Erick Rowan/Dolph Ziggler vs. Kane/Luke Harper/Big Show/Seth Rollins

Ryback and Rollins get things going with Seth being powered back into the corner. We hit the wristlock on Rollins before it’s off to Rowan for a big (red) slam. The good guys keep their control until Seth decks Ziggler with a right hand. Dolph is able to escape a delayed suplex from Harper though and tags in Ryback for a delayed suplex of his own, complete with FEED ME MORE, for two. Ziggler comes back in with a dropkick but it’s off to Rollins to take over again. The running DDT gets a quick two on Seth but everything breaks down with the bad guys standing tall as we take a break.

Back with Big Show throwing Ziggler around before it’s off to Kane. The announcers talk about Kane attacking the Bunny with JBL talking about how great a moment it was. Instead of letting the potential new fans say “what are they talking about? That sounds kind of interesting.”, Cole is right there to explain that it’s just a guy in a bunny suit to kill the idea dead.

Rollins comes back in and stomps away but Ziggler gets in a shot and DIVES over for the tag to Cena. Harper comes in as well to take the finishing sequence but Rollins breaks up the AA attempt. Kane breaks up the STF and it’s secondary finishers a go-go. The AA plants Show and Cena AA’s Harper onto Big show, but makes sure to shove Show out of the way so he can pin Harper at 13:37.

Rating: D+. You know, they almost had me here. They had me buying into this for just a second but then I lost the little hope I had. I can’t believe it, but for a second I thought Big Show might actually do a job here. Thankfully reality set in as Cena made sure to shove Big Show out of the way after the AA and having Harper land on him so harper could take the pin. I was getting worried there for a second.

Hogan comes out to celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I didn’t get as annoyed with this show as I have in the past but it’s still not really necessary. Back in the day when the actually went to Iraq and Afghanistan, the show felt like something special and unique. Now it feels like a star (pre-recorded cameo) studded house show with four matches and little effort. It also doesn’t help that this makes eleven hours (counting Sunday’s pre-show) of WWE in four days. If you watch all the shows like WWE implores you to do, the burnout hit somewhere around the middle of Smackdown last night. The show wasn’t bad, but it came and went and I won’t think of it again.

Results

Usos b. Goldust/Stardust – Double Superfly Splash

Naomi won a battle royal last eliminating Natalya

Dean Ambrose b. Bray Wyatt – Top rope elbow through a table

John Cena/Erick Rowan/Dolph Ziggler/Ryback b. Big Show/Luke Harper/Kane/Seth Rollins – Attitude Adjustment to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

Smackdown
Date: December 16, 2014
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commenators: Tom Phillips, Michae Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Welcome to one of the only times all year that WWE remembers this show matters. This is a special live edition of the show airing on a Tuesday instead of the usual taped Friday timeslot. We’re coming off a fairly dull show last night and the only thing of note is that Bray and Dean are both in the building tonight. Not in a match or anythign mind you, but in the building. Let’s get to it.

Cole says this is the 800^th episode. Apparently that’s correct, even though this is the first mention of the milestone.

Roman Reigns vs. Fandango

We get a quick recap of last night and the question now is how long does this last. Feeling out process to start until Reigns easily throws him down. Fandango actually takes him down into a chinlock as the crowd dies a bit. Reigns fights up and responds to the canned chants with a big running clothesline. There’s the Superman Punch and the spear is good for the pin at 4:47.

Result: D+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be as Reigns just ended Fandango with that spear. Speaking of ending Fandango, it’s about that time. His gimmick stopped being entertaining months ago and this idea of the new and improved version sounds more like a joke than anything else.

Quick package on the TLC match.

Here’s Ambrose for a chat. He talks about all the horrible things he and Bray did to each other but then an act of God made him lose. However, he saw a look in Bray’s eyes that showed him how crazy Dean was. For once Wyatt was in the ring with someone just as insane as he is. They face each other tomorrow night at Tribute to the Troops in a Boot Camp Match.

Bray comes up on screen to say that Ambrose is still breathing because Bray is enjoying this game. If anyone could see the creature behind his eyes, they would know that he is disdain and the slayer of his calling. He won’t stop until he sees all the heroes fall and the cities crumble. Bray is the battlefield and it will all burn.

Usos/Erick Rowan vs. Luke Harper/Miz/Damien Mizdow

This is Rowan’s second match tonight as he lost to Kane on Main Event thanks to Titus O’Neil. The fans are of course behind Mizdow more than the real version but Harper doesn’t seem to like either of them. Luke knocks Jey down into the corner to start but Jey comes back with an uppercut to the jaw. Off to Miz as everyone heads to the floor, leading to a big standoff and a break.

Back with Jimmy fighting out of a Harper chinlock but walking into a big superkick. Miz comes back in and chokes on the ropes a lot, only to get caught in a rollup for two. Mizdow holds out his hand but it’s off to Harper instead. Harper puts on the Gator Roll and Mizdow mimics him, ticking off Miz.

The heels start arguing and nearly allow a hot tag off to Jey. Mizdow finally tags himself in to the pop of the night, but Miz tags himself back in when Mizdow tries the corner clothesline. The distraction lets Jimmy make the tag off to Rowan to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Usos knock Harper onto the announcers’ table. Rowan busts out a top rope splash and actually gets a pin on Miz at 11:50.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here as it’s a standard six man tag on this show. At least Rowan finally got a pin, even though it’s an hour removed from jobbing to Kane. I don’t have much hope for him due to how they’ve treated him so far, but at least he got a win here. On a show that means almost nothing.

Naomi, who has a Divas Title shot tonight thanks to Miz, is fired up for her match. Jimmy is excited as well and can’t wait to be at ringside. Actually Naomi would rather do this one on her own, which Jimmy reluctantly agrees to.

We recap Chris Jericho and the cage match from Raw last night.

Ryback vs. Seth Rollins

No match actually as Rusev jumps Ryback during his entrance and knocks him off the stage.

Rollins says this is what happens when there’s no Authority to keep things in line. He brags about winning his war with Cena last night and says it’s time for a night off. Cue Dolph Ziggler in street clothes for an interruption. He shares credit with Sting for getting rid of the Authority and reminds Rollins that it was the night he beat him. Ziggler throws out a challenge but Rollins doesn’t think so. Dolph suggests that Seth is scared so Rollins says it’s just Dolph Ziggler and accepts.

Ascension is coming.

Divas Title: Naomi vs. Nikki Bella

Naomi is challenging, somehow due to Miz’s Hollywood connections. This actually gets big match intros. Naomi knocks her out of the corner to start and hits a kind of running double knee to the face for two. An Alabama Slam and slingshot suplex get two each for the champ and we hit the chinlock. That goes nowhere as Naomi fights up, only to collide with Nikki to put both girls down. Miz comes out to cheer for Naomi, who snaps Nikki’s throat across the top for two. Nikki sends her outside and Miz is there for a pep talk. This brings out Jimmy to chase him off but the distraction lets Nikki small package Naomi to retain at 4:15.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing special but this was perfect for the story. You can tell they’ve actually put something together here and have some thought to it. They’re using real life and fictitious characters to make something interesting and I’m interested in seeing where it’s going. Why don’t they do this more often?

As soon as the match ends and Naomi looks at Jimmy, Cole tells us about a poll on the WWE App that thinks Miz is up to no good. That line sums up one of WWE’s biggest problems right now. We have an interesting story going on with another new development but COle has to stop to plug a totally meaningless poll that hasn’t been mentioned until just now and tells us something that anyone with a brain could figure out. Stop telling us about everything else you can think of to plug and talk about what’s going on right in front of you.

Adam Rose vs. Kane

The Bunny is now in a neck brace. Kane knocks Rose down to start but walks into a clothesline and a high cross body, but Adam stops to dance. The big boot and chokeslam end this in 1:18.

Kane tombstones the Bunny again.

Rollins talks about how he’s going to go after John Cena and ruin everything he does until the Authority comes back. If that means he has to work with Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar, so be it.

Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title. Rollins, sporting bruised ribs, bails to the floor to start before heading back inside, only to have Dolph throw him right back outside. Back in and Seth kicks him in the ribs to take over before dropping Dolph with some clotheslines. Ziggler tries a quick Zig Zag but gets sent to the floor, allowing Noble to get in a cheap shot as we take a break.

Back with Rollins in full control and taking his sweet time hammering on Ziggler. A hard running clothesline puts Dolph down again and Rollins sends him out to the floor. With Noble shouting encouragement in that country accent, Rollins goes up but gets knocked down onto the ribs. Dolph scores with a dropkick for two, ducks the enziguri and nails the running DDT for two more.

Now Seth’s enziguri connects but he takes too much time going up, allowing Dolph to run the corner for a top rope faceplant. The Stooges offer a distraction so Dolph backdrops Rollins over the top and down onto both of them. Fameasser gets two back inside but Noble nails Dolph with a cheap shot. That earns the Stooges an ejection, setting up the Zig Zag for the pin at 15:13.

Rating: B-. I’m torn here. For one thing, I’m glad that they give Ziggler a big win like this, but at the same time they give Rollins a huge win last night and then have him job here. The one time they should have had a run-in finish and they actually have a fall. It does help that the Stooges’ distraction led to the finish, but I’d have preferred if he wasn’t pinned in the middle of the ring.

Ziggler escapes a beating to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was your standard Smackdown: some decent wrestling, some one off matches, and nothing of note happening. There was nothing special about this one and this week is already feeling more like a headache than something to look forward to. Tomorrow’s special is likely to feel like a glorified house show and Raw was nothing special either. Is it any wonder why there’s no interest in the product at the moment? Not only is the show dull, but there’s a ton of it at the moment. It’s not the worst show, but there’s no reason to watch it, as usual.

Results

Roman Reigns b. Fandango – Spear

Usos/Erick Rowan b. Miz/Damien Mizdow/Luke Harper – Top rope splash to Miz

Nikki Bella b. Naomi – Small package

Kane b. Adam Rose – Chokeslam

Dolph Ziggler b. Seth Rollins – Zig Zag

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Tables Ladders and Chairs 2014
Date: December 14, 2014
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

We’re wrapping up the PPV schedule this year with Survivor Series Part II here, as most of the matches are just singles versions of matches from last month’s main event. The main event will either be Cena vs. Rollins in a tables match with Cena’s #1 contendership on the line or Wyatt vs. Ambrose in a TLC match with nothing on the line. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: New Day vs. Goldust/Stardust

Woods is on the floor as Goldust shoulders Kofi down to start. Kingston comes back with an armdrag into an armbar as the announcers are talking about Great Gazoo from the Flintstones. The discussion breaks down into a talk about jumping the shark. JBL: “That’s when you put something stupid to get people to stay with your show.” Cole: “Like MizTV.” Off to Big E. and Stardust as JBL lists off E.’s powerlifting records.

E. throws Stardust into the air for a dropkick from Kofi for two off a big crash. The Dusts head outside with Big E. launching Kofi onto both guys as New Day is in full control. Back in and the Dusts take over on Big E. in the corner as Lawler is back to the Great Gazoo thing as they debate which show he was on.

As the wrestling match in the background goes on, Kofi gets the hot tag and cleans house with dropkicks. The New Day Drop has Stardust in trouble but he sends Kofi’s shoulder into the post, followed by Goldust whipping him into the barricade. A double stomp in the corner has Kofi in even more trouble and Stardust busts out Colt Cabana’s Billy Goat’s Curse (reverse Boston crab).

Kingston flips out of a double belly to back suplex and dives over for the hot tag to Big E. Everything breaks down and Stardust nails Big E. for two and we get a plug for the Flinstones/WWE movie. The Midnight Hour (Big Ending/Top rope DDT) ends Stardust as 11:08.

Rating: C-. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw or Smackdown here as the announcers got on my nerves and the match was just ok. Big E and Kofi are a good team and that’s a solid finisher, but I’m not entirely sure where they go from here. It’s not too early for them to go after the tag belts is it?

The opening video is all about the violence and talks about how the weapons will be the most important things all night.

Intercontinental Title: Luke Harper vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler comes out in his Kent State jacket and is the huge hometown favorite as well as the challenger. An early superkick attempt sends Harper bailing to the floor but he quickly throws Ziggler into a ladder and then into the timekeeper’s area. Ziggler tries to make a fast save but eats a big boot for his efforts. Luke bridges the big ladder between the announcers’ table and ring but Ziggler escapes, only to charge into a spinning Boss Man Slam on the floor.

Back in and Ziggler is sent face first into the ladder, which falls down onto him in a big crash. Luke puts Ziggler behind a ladder in the corner but Ziggler slams it into his face. He heads up top and looks to drive the ladder down onto Harper but Luke dropkicks the ladder, sending Ziggler down to the floor. The champ throws the ladder at Ziggler and nails him in the face for another painful landing.

Ziggler slowly gets back up and picks up a ladder, so Harper tries a suicide dive and hits said ladder before crashing onto the ladder in a horrible looking crash. He’s still able to stop a climbing Ziggler though and sends him down onto the ropes. Ziggler escapes a powerbomb and dropkicks the champ onto the ladder to get a breather. The Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb onto a ladder bridged in the corner to make me cringe again. The cuts and bruises on Ziggler’s side are disturbing.

Harper puts a ladder onto Ziggler’s body and catapults both of them into the bottom rope. Ziggler is busted open and thankfully Harper starts climbing, only to have Dolph shove the doctor away and charge up to make a save with right hands. Both guys come crashing down but it’s Harper up first. His powerbomb is countered into a wicked faceplant into the ladder and Ziggler shouts DDT. He climbs up, Harper tries for a save, and Ziggler dives down with a DDT.

Luke does the ladder around the neck spot but eats a superkick to knock him down again. Another shot with the ladder sends Harper (bleeding from the arm) onto the bridged ladder outside. Harper somehow gets back in for a save though, sending Ziggler into the ropes. Back up and Dolph rides a ladder into Harper to crush him against the standing ladder but Harper makes another save. A kick to the face knocks Harper off the second ladder and Ziggler FINALLY wins the title at 16:39.

Rating: B. In probably the only time you’ll hear this comparison brought up with Ziggler and/or Harper, this was like Lelani Kai taking the Women’s Title from Wendi Richter in 1985. The idea was to give the heel a quick run so the hero(ine) could get a big win on the major stage. Ziggler wins in a feel good moment here, which just happened to come after a very hard hitting match. Good stuff here and a really solid match.

The announcers treat this like a career making win. I wouldn’t go that far.

We see Miz offering Naomi a deal on the pre-show: if he leaves as champion, she gets to be a star. Naomi says that her only goal is to be Divas Champion but she doesn’t seem sure.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Usos

Usos are challenging with Jimmy and Miz (also from Cleveland) trading near falls a few seconds in. Jimmy chases Miz around the ring as the fans want Mizdow. Back in and Jimmy tackles Miz down and hammers away as Miz was the one that made things personal. The brothers load Miz up for a double suplex so Mizdow does a handstand in the corner. A clothesline puts Miz on the floor and the Usos hit their big dive, only to have Miz take over back inside.

We hit the chinlock on Jey for a bit before he easily escapes and makes the hot tag off to Jimmy. Miz gets knocked down in the corner so Mizdow does exactly the same thing without being touched. Only Miz takes the running Umaga attack as Mizdow is smart enough to roll outside.

The distraction lets Miz get in a cheap shot to take over and everything breaks down. The Finale puts Jey down but Jimmy busts out Konnan’s Tequila Sunrise of all things but Miz makes the rope. That’s fine with Jimmy who loads up the Superfly Slash, sending the champs to the floor in retreat. Jimmy dives on Mizdow but eats a Slammy to the face for the DQ at 7:10.

Rating: C-. So after all those weeks and the only interesting thing in the feud, Naomi meant nothing whatsoever. That’s quite the boring way to end the match, which wasn’t all that great in the first place. At least the Usos didn’t win the belts back, which is an odd thing to say as I like the team. Just not as champions again this fast.

Rollins dedicates his win tonight to the Authority and promises to destroy Cena until John agrees to bring the Authority back.

We get a tale of the tape…..of the stairs. Seriously.

Big Show vs. Erick Rowan

This is a stairs match, which I guess means the stairs can be used. Rowan hammers away to start but they quickly head to the floor where Show easily slams him. So there’s no DQ and you can use the stairs. If there’s no DQ, why can’t you use everything else? Rowan is whipped into the stairs but comes back to ram them into Show’s face. That’s fine with Show as he bounces Rowan off the post and throws him back inside.

Show changes his mind and puts the steps on the announcers’ table. A big whip has Rowan in even more trouble so the fans tell Big Show that he sucks. Back in and Show crushes Rowan in the back with the stairs again before wedging them in the corner. A whip sends Rowan into said steps but he pops up and slams Show down onto another set.

Erick can’t crush him with another set and Rowan falls to the floor off the impact. Show spears Rowan into a pile of stairs as this just keeps going. Back in and Show chokeslams him onto the steps and hits the KO but doesn’t cover. Instead he pins Rowan with the stairs for the three count at 11:15.

Rating: D. Big Show won. Again. Because we can’t have Big Show lose like ever right? This was a waste of Rowan’s push and basically said that he’s in the second tier of giants. Show is 42 years old and winning matches on pay per view over a new and creative character because….I have no idea why. The match sucked too as it was just a bunch of spots that happened to have stairs involved.

We recap Cena vs. Rollins. This started at Night of Champions when Rollins saved Lesnar from Cena, setting up the events of Survivor Series, where Rollins got a pin after Big Show KO’d Cena. Tonight it’s a tables match and if Cena loses, he is no longer #1 contender and Rollins gains nothing.

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

I’m kind of shocked this is happening so early. Heyman is watching at ringside as Lesnar’s next title defense is announced for Royal Rumble. Cena starts fast and takes Rollins’ head off with a clothesline. The Stooges take the table away though, allowing Rollins to get in a cheap shot to take over. He lays the table over the top rope in the corner but the Stooges knock it away when Cena loads up a powerbomb. A quick triple teaming puts Cena down and Seth takes over again.

Cena is in trouble in the corner but Seth stops to pose a bit, soaking in a few LET’S GO ROLLINS chants in the process. The distraction lets Cena get in some of his usual to take over, drawing in the Stooges for another beatdown. They load up a TripleBomb through a table but Cena fights out and bails to the floor. He heads to the entrance and finds a piece of the barricade. Noble chases after him and takes a suplex on the barricade (JBL: “CALL NIDIA AND TELL HER HE’S HURT!”).

Cena swings a table but hits the post so he throws Mercury into the timekeeper’s area to make it one on one. Rollins whips Cena into the barricade and sets up a pair of tables on the floor. He can’t quite suplex Cena through them though and gets suplexed back into the ring. Both guys are down but it’s Rollins up first, only to be backdropped out to the floor. A Money in the Bank shot to the face drops Cena and Rollins loads up another table. He spends too much time mocking Cena though and gets caught in the AA, only to have the ref get bumped.

Rollins escapes anyway and kicks Cena onto the table. He heads up top, only to get AA’d through the table. No referee though so the Stooges come in to clean up the evidence. Cena fights out of another TripleBomb and AA’s both Stooges through a table at the same time. That’s always cool to see. Rollins comes back in but fights out of another AA attempt as both guys wind up on the apron. Both guys fall through the double tables at the same time at 18:30.

Multiple referees come out to say either guy won but no one can figure it out. We restart the match with Rollins sneding him to the floor for a big dive. Cena pops up and hits an AA onto the announcers’ table but it doesn’t break. Instead of just doing it again, Cena puts another table up in the corner as Big Show comes out. He clears some of the broken table out of the ring and beats up Cena with ease. The chokeslam is loaded up but Roman Reigns returns through the crowd and Superman Punches Show down. A spear drives him through a table and Rollins eats one as well, setting up the AA through the table for the win at 23:30 total.

Rating: B-. Well it wasn’t clean. Actually it was closer to filthy but I don’t think anyone expected any other ending. Reigns returning to set up his big showdown with Rollins is a good thing, but I’m not all that jazzed about Cena vs. Lesnar again, especially if it ends with Big Show interfering again. Seriously why can’t he just go away? Match was fun but a bit tiring.

Pre-show recap and expert panel preview.

The Bellas are ready for Nikki’s title defense. Brie shrugs off everything Nikki has done to her by saying blood is thicker than water.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella

Nikki is defending after her sister helped her take the title last month. The champ bails to the floor to start before AJ knocks her back outside. A cheap shot from Brie is enough to let Nikki take over back inside and the slow motion offense begins. She bends AJ’s back around the post in a painful looking move before cranking on both arms at once.

Off to a chinlock as the announcers debate if Brie is lurking or not. AJ reverses into a guillotine choke but Nikki drives her into the corner to break it up. A neckbreaker gets two for AJ and Nikki gets the same off a shot to the face. AJ pops back up with a Shining Wizard but Brie puts her sister’s foot on the ropes, earning her an ejection. The distraction lets Nikki spray something in AJ’s face, setting up the Rack Attack to retain at 7:28.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t horrible but Brie telling her sister to GET STRONG sounded so stupid. Like I’ve said for months, the Bellas just aren’t interesting characters. They’re portrayed as these girls that have worked so hard to get where they are but they come off like these stuck up girls that have no fire in them and who would be squashed like a bug by anyone other high level Diva ever.

Reigns says it feels great to be back and enters himself in the Rumble. Last year (this year actually) was nothing compared to what he’ll do this year (meaning next).

Kane vs. Ryback

Chairs match over who is the real monster. They duel with chairs to start until Kane gets in the first significant shot to take over. Ryback comes back with a hard clothesline and three middle rope splashes to put Kane down. Kane nails him with a few chair shots to the back and loads the chair up in the corner before ramming Ryback face first for two. A running DDT on the chair gets the same and Kane just unloads on Ryback with the chair.

That’s not enough for Kane though so he throws in a bunch of chairs so he can have his pick. He sets two of them next to each other in the middle of the ring but Ryback slams Kane through both of them. Now it’s Ryback destroying Kane with the chair but the Meathook is countered with a pelted chair to the face. The chokeslam gets two but the Tombstone is countered, setting up the Meathook and Shell Shock for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: D+. This was better than the stairs match but it still didn’t do anything for me. At the end of the day it’s nice to see Kane finally take a fall so it’s not infuriating like the Rowan match, but it just kept going and only does a little bit for Ryback. He does seem to be a bigger player now than he was a few weeks ago though so there’s potential there.

US Title: Rusev vs. Jack Swagger

Rusev is defending and broke Swagger’s mentor’s leg to set this up. Jack cuts off Lana’s speech and goes right for Rusev, nailing him with a big clothesline. He takes out Rusev’s ankle and the champion can barely stand. The Vader Bomb misses but Swagger counters the superkick into the Patriot Lock but Rusev rolls through into an Accolade attempt. Jack is too close to the ropes though and the hold doesn’t go on. And never mind as Rusev puts it on a few seconds later but Jack hangs on for almost a minute. He gets to his knees and rolls over into the Patriot Lock but Rusev gets to the ropes. A second superkick puts Swagger on the floor and a third sets up the Accolade to make Swagger tap at 4:52.

Rating: D. Have they killed Swagger enough yet? They’ve certainly killed my interest in the guy for a good while as they’ve done the same match over and over again with nothing really changing. We get the idea already: someone has to stand up for America and it’s not going to be Swagger. Find someone else already.

We recap Ambrose vs. Wyatt. Bray cost Dean his match inside the Cell against Rollins and Ambrose has gone after him ever since. They had a fight last month and then Dean destroyed the rocking chair that used to belong to Bray’s Sister Abigail. This is a TLC match for the big war.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

Since there’s nothing to put over the ring, you win by pinfall or submission. Dean nails him from the apron and the fight is on in the aisle. A suicide dive takes Bray down again and Ambrose sends him into the barricade for good measure. Ambrose clotheslines Bray into the crowd as they fight near the expert panel area. Bray is down so Dean dives off the panel’s table to take him down again.

Back to ringside now with Dean nailing him with a chair as Bray might be bleeding from the arm. They slug it out again with Dean in full control and setting up a table on the floor. Now it’s kendo sticks time but Bray locks eyes with Ambrose. He tells Dean to hit him but tries to grab a chair, earning him a hard stick shot to the head. A White Russian legsweep drops Bray again as this is one sided in the first five minutes. Dean goes after him with the stick again but Wyatt kicks him off the apron and through the table at ringside.

Bray puts the kendo stick in the corner sticking out and whips Ambrose face first into the end for a unique move. Now the ladder is brought in and set up in the corner but Dean sends Bray into the steel to take over. A bulldog gets two and Dean puts the ladder over the corner. He drapes Bray over the middle rope for a top rope Fameasser onto a chair. The finishers are countered but Bray just ENDS him with a clothesline for two.

Ambrose comes back with a ladder shot and takes Bray into the aisle. There just happens to be a table there so Bray is placed on top, setting up an Ambrose elbow from a ladder. Dean has that crazy look on his face and puts Bray on another table for a second elbow from an even higher ladder. Both guys are down now but stagger back to the ring where Bray hits a quick Sister Abigail for two. He tries another with the kiss but Dean reverses into a rollup for two. Dean sends him face first into the ladder and nails Dirty Deeds for a delayed two.

Ambrose goes under the ring and finds a live monitor (Cole: “That’s for our technicians. JBL: “And they live under the ring?”) which shows him a bunch of ladders near the entrance. He goes and finds the biggest ladder in the building and sets it up next to the ring but Bray is back up.

Dean blocks another attempt to crush his throat on the post with the chair like Bray did to him, only to do it right back to Bray like the crazy man he is. A third elbow off the huge ladder crushes Wyatt through the announcers’ table and both guys are down. They slowly get back in and Dean gets the monitor, only to have it blow up in his face. Dean is blinded, allowing another Sister Abigail to knock him out for the pin at 27:26.

Rating: A-. It was a wild brawl and a good way to end the show, but I’m only lukewarm on the ending. That’s far more logical of an ending than whatever they did in the Cell, but it’s still not the best. Wyatt getting a big win in the main event of a PPV certainly isn’t a bad thing though and Dean isn’t beaten clean so everyone wins, but it’s still not great and needed a bigger spot to end things.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was good enough for the carnage but the bad stuff REALLY dragged it down. I’m really worried about the Big Show’s continued push but that’s something you have to live with in WWE. This is a show where the good was really good but the bad was really boring, which cancels out a lot of the hard work. The main event scene still needs a huge makeover, but it could have been a lot worse. The fact that this came three days after Takeover didn’t do it any favors though.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Luke Harper – Ziggler pulled down the title

Usos b. Miz/Damien Mizdow via DQ when Miz hit Jimmy with a Slammy

Big Show b. Erick Rowan – KO Punch

John Cena b. Seth Rollina – Attitude Adjustment through a table

Nikki Bella b. AJ Lee – Rack Attack

Ryback b. Kane – Shell Shock

Rusev b. Jack Swagger – Accolade

Bray Wyatt b. Dean Ambrose – Sister Abigail

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

Smackdown
Date: December 12, 2014
Location: Columbus Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for TLC and I’m actually looking forward to the show. Granted it’s nowhere near as much as I was looking forward to Takeover last night but that’s not a fair comparison. I’m sure the main event will be yet another tag match with people from the Survivor Series main event involved because Heaven forbid we ask the writers to come up with ANYTHING else. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw with the latest huge brawl. These things are really running together. Also do the recaps really need to go on for three minutes?

Opening sequence.

Here’s Cena to open things up but Rollins interrupts him after just a few seconds. Rollins says Cena is in this spot because he’s done exactly what he’s promised to do over the last ten years. That all ends on Sunday though because Rollins will set the new standard of doing everything he says he’ll do. The future may have to go through Cena, but there is no future without Seth Rollins. You might even say that Cena’s time is up and Rollins’ time is now.

Cena says this is the day that Rollins has become a man, because he doesn’t see the Shield or Authority around him. Instead Cena sees a proud man standing on his own for the first time. That’s exactly what Cena want too, because Monday morning, Seth is going to have to look in the mirror and say he isn’t ready. The future isn’t Sunday, next week or next year. The future is now because John Cena is here.

Seth says Cena keeps talking about the future like it’s some far off concept, but it’s been here since Rollins set foot in WWE and everything leads to this Sunday. At TLC, Seth isn’t just taking away Cena’s chance at being champion again. Sunday is the beginning of the end of John Cena. A Cena chant starts up but Seth shouts it down, saying Cena becomes a memory after TLC with the rise of the new standard bearer, Seth Rollins.

Cena calls Rollins a fool but if Rollins wants to talk like a man, he needs to listen up. This is Cena’s life and if Seth thinks he’s getting rid of Cena, he can line up with all the other people that have said those same things. Rollins can stand with Rene Dupree, HHH, Orlando Jordan and the Rock, because Cena has survived them all. REALLY good exchange here, but I don’t buy Rollins having a chance on Sunday because we have to get to Lesnar vs. Cena III, even though the interest doesn’t seem to be there.

The main event is Rowan/Ryback/Ziggler vs. Harper/Show/Kane. Of course it is.

The Ascension is coming. It’s about time.

Usos vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

Miz/Mizdow are on commentary and Mizdow has a mini-Slammy. Before the match, Kidd and Cesaro say they’re ready to grab the brass ring like Vince told them to. That line is sounding more and more like a plot device every week. Jimmy and Kidd get things going as Naomi is watching in the back. Off to Jey for a top rope elbow to the arm but Tyson drives him into the corner for some shoulders from Cesaro.

Jey loses his shirt but drives Cesaro into the corner for a tag off to his brother. That’s fine with Cesaro who slams Jimmy down for two and slaps on the chinlock. Back up and a dropkick puts Cesaro on the floor, setting up the big dive from Jimmy. Kidd gets in a kick from the apron as Miz gets a call from his agent. Apparently it’s about Naomi so Miz leaves to talk to her. We take a break and come back with Jimmy fighting out of a chinlock, only to get caught in an overhead belly to belly for two.

Kidd comes in for a chinlock of his own but he misses a legdrop on the apron. It’s still not enough for a hot tag though as Cesaro kicks Jey to the floor. There’s the Swing but Kidd dropkicks Jimmy out of the air in a painful looking spot. Cesaro misses a charge into the post though and an enziguri finally allows the tag to Jey. House is cleaned with the Samoan drop and running Umaga attack but everything breaks down. Jey superkicks Cesaro’s head off and the Superfly Splash is enough for the pin at 11:53.

Rating: C+. This was better than I was expecting with Kidd and Cesaro working well enough together. The division is in need of some fresh teams so why not have two guys that are ready to move up to the next level? If nothing else that swing into the dropkick is a great spot and could be a solid finisher.

Miz/Mizdow are in the back with Naomi and suggest that she split time between Hollywood and WWE. Naomi gives a badly scripted response about how she knows what Miz is up to, but Miz says his agent wants to keep this going. He talked the agent off the ledge but the agent doesn’t want to work with someone with such a jealous husband. Naomi needs to sort Jimmy out and soon.

After a break, Naomi runs into the Usos and goes off on Jimmy for not having her back. She leaves and Jey says let her cool off. Jimmy knew this was going to happen and yells about how Miz is messing with them. Jey says Jimmy has two days to get his head right because this is exactly what Miz wants.

Video on Cena vs. Lesnar which transitions into Cena vs. Rollins.

Bray Wyatt says he offered Ambrose a path to salvation but Dean turned him down. This is no longer about what could have been but now it’s about what will be. In two thousand years, people will still be talking about the things Wyatt will do to Dean this Sunday. Run.

Alicia Fox vs. Nikki Bella

Non-title and AJ is on commentary with her Slammy in her arms like a baby. Fox nails a quick dropkick to start and works on an armbar. JBL and Cole debate the differences between the Women’s Title and Divas Title as Fox charges into a knee in the corner. Back in and AJ says Nikki is like the head cheerleader from an 80s movie. A hammerlock slam gets two for Nikki and she cranks on both arms with a knee in the back. Fox fights up again but misses a boot in the corner, earning her a forearm to the jaw. The Rack Attack is good for the pin at 4:16.

Rating: C-. I can’t believe I’m saying this but the current Divas story is growing on me. It’s amazing how much easier these things are to sit through when I don’t have to listen to the Bellas talking about how hard they’ve worked and had to fight to get here. Nikki is actually getting better in the ring and can have a passable match and the idea of AJ fighting the Bellas is a good enough story. Well assuming you ignore Brie just siding with her sister again after all those months of fighting.

Nikki Racks Fox again while talking trash to AJ.

We recap the Slammy winners from Monday.

Big E. vs. Goldust

Goldust takes over to start with a powerslam and DDT for two each. Big E. comes back with a clothesline and belly to belly, only to charge into a spinebuster for another near fall. The Big Ending is escaped and Big E. charges into a knee. Not that it matters as Big E. pops up and hits the Big Ending for the pin at 2:15.

We look at Reigns winning Superstar of the Year.

Jack Swagger vs. Titus O’Neil

Swagger drives him into the corner to start and knocks Titus outside, only to be sent shoulder first into the post for two. Titus hammers away and kicks Jack’s head off before choking on the ropes. A slam doesn’t work though as Jack rolls over into the Patriot Lock for the submission at 2:24.

Rusev and Lana interrupt We The People and pose with the title.

Video on Ambrose vs. Wyatt’s TLC match. I really hope they go insane with it to give this the blowoff it deserves.

Dean is sitting under a ladder in the back. He’s heard Bray Wyatt talk about them like they’re viking warriors but Dean is just a gutter rat or a dog that loves to fight. The two of them weren’t meant to rule together but to beat each other to pieces forever. This Sunday, when Dean has Bray’s whole world in his hands, he’s going to crush it.

Big Show/Kane/Luke Harper vs. Dolph Ziggler/Erick Rowan/Ryback

All the weapons are set up around the ring of course. Kane and Ziggler get things going with a dropkick and cross body putting the big man down. Off to Rowan for a big slam as we take an early break. Back with Rowan hammering Show down against the ropes and out to the floor. Erick misses a charge into the post though and Show stands on his back. Kane comes in and hammers away again before it’s off to Harper for a chinlock.

That goes nowhere so Kane comes in for a double clothesline to put both guys down. The hot tag brings in Ziggler to clean house, including countering Kane’s powerbomb into a faceplant for two. Kane never liked Kidman though so he kicks Dolph’s head off for two as we take another break. Back again with Ziggler fighting back on Harper but getting catapulted into the middle rope for two.

The canned chants want Ryback as Kane charges into a boot in the corner but Big Show breaks up the tag. Ziggler dropkicks the big man’s knee out and counters the chokeslam into a sleeper instead of, you know, tagging. Show easily escapes and hits the chokeslam for two. The KO Punch misses and Ziggler hits a Zig Zag out of nowhere. Dolph finally tags Ryback to clean house as everything breaks down. Show runs over Rowan on the floor and Ryback Meathooks Luke. There’s the Shell Shock for the pin at 17:08.

Rating: C. OF COURSE THEY HAD HARPER TAKE THE PIN! Of course they did. I mean, we can’t have Big Show and Kane, who are almost NINETY YEARS OLD combined job to Ryback so let’s just have the Intercontinental Champion do it instead. I know I harp on this every week but I really want an answer. Why in the world are Big Show and Kane immune from taking a fall?

Harper may be the current Intercontinental Champion and he has a bright future in front of him. On the other hand we have two former World Champions who have been around for about thirty five years combined ans neither of them can job to Ryback? This happens week to week with all the young guys taking falls because we have to protect these two? I really do want an answer to this because it’s one of the most maddening things going on in WWE right now.

Post match the weapons are brought in and Dolph dives off the ladder to knock down all three giants on the floor to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Standard issue Smackdown here although with a good exchange from Rollins and Cena. That being said, I have no reason to believe Seth has a chance on Sunday which kind of defeats the purpose. That’s the problem with some of their long term stuff: they’ve locked in Lesnar vs. Cena and nothing that happens between now and then matters.

The rest of the show was your usual stuff, but man alive I’m sick of these same people fighting. We’ve seen it for over a month now and hopefully it ends after Sunday. These writers come up with one idea every few months and then ride it out until there’s nothing left to get out of it. This whole company needs a shakeup and something fresh, which doesn’t seem to be happening anytime soon.

Results

Usos b. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd – Superfly Splash to Cesaro

Nikki Bella b. Alicia Fox – Rack Attack

Big E. b. Goldust – Big Ending

Jack Swagger b. Titus O’Neil – Patriot Lock

Ryback/Dolph Ziggler/Erick Rowan b. Big Show/Kane/Luke Harper – Shell Shock to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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