Monday Night Raw
Date: June 22, 1998
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Attendance: 10,891
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

This is the go home show for the King of the Ring and the first set of KOTR matches, so we’ll have four of those tonight. Other than that expect more as far as the C-o-n-spiracy and the whole fallout from that. We also have Kane and Mankind vs. an Outlaw apiece. This looks like a very standard go home show, so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show with Taker destroying Bearer. Kane will break his silence tonight.

Theme song.

The Cell is above the ring again.

Here’s Vince to open the show. He brings out the next WWF Champion, Kane. Bearer is watching on satellite. The fans immediately chant for Austin. Vince says this will be the greatest day of Kane’s life on Sunday. Kane has apparently requested a special kind of match. There’s no pin, submission, DQ or countout. It’s first blood. Vince wants to know how confident Austin is. Kane (who hasn’t said anything until now) says that if he doesn’t win the title, he’ll set himself on fire. I can’t help but laugh at this.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Ken Shamrock vs. Mark Henry

The Nation is sent out again as they’ve been for the last few weeks. Shamrock makes Henry miss and fires off the kicks. He walks into a powerslam to take him down though. Legdrop gets no cover for Henry, which is chalked up to a rookie mistake by JR. Henry hooks on a bearhug and then a splash to the back of Kenny. Back to the bearhug. Shamrock tries to come back with a sunset flip but Henry drops down onto him. And now bearhug #3. FEEL THE ELECTRICITY BABY!!! Shamrock fights back and manages to hit the rana, sending Mark to the floor. Vader runs out and drills Henry. Belly to belly by Shamrock wins this.

Rating: D+. Henry somehow didn’t get any better for about 12 years. I mean dude, by the laws of averages and muscle memory you would think that somehow he would get better. That belly to belly was pretty impressive. Shamrock had a lot of talent but was only going to be an upper midcarder at best given the way his character went. Plus injuries on top of that.

Edge is in the audience.

X-Pac vs. Dustin Runnels

Dustin, the newly religious man, offers a handshake but gets a crotch chop for his efforts. The move known as the X-Factor takes him down but it doesn’t mean much yet. Dustin crotches him to counter a bulldog but Pac sends him to the floor. Chyna hits him low and momentum shifts again. Pac hits some of those very fast legdrops of his. I’ve always liked those. Off to a chinlock and we talk about how Austin could make Kane bleed. Dustin makes a comeback and a cross body gets two. One armed suplex gets the same. He loads up the bulldog but Chyna trips him. Pac kicks his head off for the pin.

Rating: C-. It’s amazing how much less annoying Sean Waltman is when he’s against someone who isn’t a giant. Dustin is a good sized guy but they didn’t have to make him look like an idiot here to have Pac beat him. That’s what gets on my nerves about small guys like Pac and Mysterio: if they’re fighting giants, the giants have to look like idiots for the small guy to win. This has nothing to do with the match. I’m just kind of rambling now.

Pac won’t shake his hand again post match.

We talk to Bearer at his home in….wherever it is. He promises to be at Kane’s side on Sunday.

Here’s Jerry Lawler to rant about Al Snow some more. Snow has apparently stolen the cleaning lady’s dress. Jerry has some papers for Snow, and here comes Snow out of the crowd in a dress. Head has the King’s Crown. Jerry offers a meeting with Vince for the crown. Lawler gets the crown back and Snow is handed a contract, signed by Vince McMahon. Snow and Head have to team up and face Too Much at King of the Ring. If they win, Snow gets his meeting with Vince.

Snow drops to the mat and says pin me and pay me. Why wait until the PPV apparently? Jerry calls out Too Much but Snow pops up and beats them up with Head.

Edge is now sitting on the stage.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Marc Mero vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett knocks him to the floor quickly as the fans are cheering for Sable. There’s a gag order on the Sable issue which translates to me that they have no idea what they’re doing with the story but they have to have her back. Mero powerbombs Jarrett and hits a moonsault press for two. He might have hurt his knee jumping but still manages a small package for two. Jackie trips Jarrett and Tennessee Lee goes after her. That lets Mero hit Jeff low and hit the TKO but there’s no referee. Cue Sable for a distraction and Jarrett grabs a DDT to advance.

Rating: C-. Match was okayish but this was about Sable. I don’t think they ever actually revealed what the reason was for her coming back, but that’s par for the course in this ear. Anyway, decent match and a weird thing to see Jarrett as the face in one of these, especially after that character totally bombed as a face for the Horsemen.

Jarrett says he’s seen the light and will be king.

Kane vs. Road Dogg

I don’t see this lasting long. Billy is sent to the back. Roadie tries to stick and move but there’s too much Kane. A big boot puts Road Dogg down and there’s the smother that Kane has been using on Cena lately. Road Dogg takes a beating but manages to get in some punches and a clothesline to send him to the floor. And never mind as Kane takes over again quickly. Chokeslam is loaded up but Roadie hits him low….to no effect. The chokeslam hits and Tombstone finishes.

Rating: D. Just an extended squash here but it made Kane look unhurtable going into the match on Sunday. That’s the point of this and it also pushes the tag title match which is coming eventually. See how easy it can be to efficiently book a show? Why don’t people get that more often?

Bearer talks about the Conspiracy and Taker wanting to shut him up last week. Screams are heard and Taker comes in and destroys Bearer again. Various stuff is destroyed and the feed cuts out.

And now, it’s time.

Edge vs. Jose Estrada

All that is known about Edge is that he’s a tortured soul from Toronto. He comes in through the crowd and Estrada jumps him. Edge comes back with a spear and sends him to the floor. Edge hits a flip dive over the top onto Estrada….and breaks Estrada’s neck, putting him out for months. Edge wins by countout. The replay shows that Edge’s leg landed on the top of Jose’s head. It only lasted about 30 seconds.

And that’s how Edge debuted.

Kane is freaking in the back as Foley tries to calm him down. There’s a buzz from Kane’s voicebox.

Jose is taken out on a stretcher. Based on the replay, it’s hard to say who’s at fault. When you flip forward like that, it’s hard to control where you land. Probably a combination of both.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: Dan Severn vs. Owen Hart

Severn is in that t-shirt of his. He spears Owen down and you know he wants it on the mat. The American hits a German on the Canadian but gets caught in an enziguri. Fisherman’s suplex gets two for Owen. Severn comes back but gets caught in a neckbreaker. Owen rolls outside and grabs a chair. Severn grabs it and in the distraction, X-Pac comes in and cracks a chair on Owen’s back. Severn’s submission ends this. Too short to rate but the match was fine.

The Nation runs Severn off.

Post break Rock calls out DX for a fight and here they come. Remember that it’s still HHH vs. Rock in the tournament later. DX comes out but suits hold them back.

King of the Ring Quarterfinals: HHH vs. The Rock

Just Chyna out there with either person. Winner gets Severn at the PPV. Rock takes over to start and hammers HHH down. He ducks his head though and HHH grabs a swinging neckbreaker. HHH takes over and drops the Flair Knee for two. Rock takes over and hits a suplex for two. There’s the People’s Elbow but HHH kicks out. Rock punches HHH, HHH punches Rock, HHH hits the facebuster to take over. Rock sends him to the floor but as he poses, Chyna DDTs him for two. They trade sleepers and Chyna tries to interfere for some reason. The distraction lets Rock hit a low blow and win with a fisherman’s suplex.

Rating: D+. How was that 8 minutes long? Usually the rule of thumb I use is that each paragraph of text is about four minutes of video. How in the world was this an 8 minute matches? It was mainly punching for one thing and nothing at all stands out about it. Definitely one of the weakest I can remember from these two, but their big one is coming.

DX and the Nation run out and it’s a big brawl.

Here’s the semi-finals for the KOTR:

Shamrock
Jarrett

Severn
Rock

Kane is still freaking out. Mankind says stay here because he has to go have a match.

Mankind vs. Billy Gunn

Mankind talks about being a history fan and having a picture of men from Gettysburg near his bed. As he’s talking about this, the Cell is lowered. The story was about time healing all wounds, but he doesn’t want to heal the wounds with Taker after what Taker did to Paul Bearer last week. They’re not going to prosecute him though because it’s a family matter on Sunday at the PPV.

Here’s Billy and the Cell is still down. All Mankind to start including the running knee in the corner. He takes Billy to the mat with a body scissors and the Cell is up. Billy tries to fire off some punches and they go to the floor. Chyna’s interference doesn’t really work at all. She gets ejected and they stay on the floor. Billy drops him onto the railing and into the post but it doesn’t really do anything. Billy dropkicks the steps into Mankind’s face and hammers away but Mankind keeps getting up. Fameasser (called the Rocker Dropper) doesn’t do anything and a piledriver is countered. Mandible Claw ends this.

Rating: D. The problem here was that the ending was inevitable. I mean, did anyone think Billy Gunn was going to win this? The match just went on and wasn’t all that interesting at all. The Outlaws were good at just about everything, except for that whole having matches thing. They were more of an act than a team, which makes things like this a bit annoying.

Mankind can’t find Kane.

Here’s Sable of all people with about 5 minutes left in the show. She brings out Austin in the white baseball jersey which never really worked for him. He wants Sable to go flip Vince off for him. Austin looks around for anyone wanting a fight and then accepts Kane’s challenge. In one of the funniest lines I can ever remember, Austin says if Kane lights himself on fire, he’ll be there with marshmallows, hot dogs and beer and we’ll have a big campfire. Here comes Kane but blood flows from the ceiling onto Austin. Now the white shirt makes more sense. Kane says on Sunday the blood will be real.

Overall Rating: D+. I really didn’t like this one as much as I did last week’s. This was more about getting all of the things that we had to get done before Sunday done. The lack of Vince has been hurting the shows as he’s only been in the opening segments lately. The wrestling here continues to be weak, but seeing Edge debut, even though it was shot, was very cool.

Here’s King of the Ring if you’re interested:

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

This is an interesting show in that the card looks good on paper but when you think about how things have been built up it’s hard to care at all about it.  The shows leading up to it have been dominated by HHH vs. Vince vs. Axel with Axel being a pawn in the entire thing.  A challenge to you: explain in two coherent sentences what the Vince vs. HHH feud is about.  If it takes you more than ten seconds, it’s too complicated a story.  As for the rest of the show, it really pales in comparison other than the Shield stuff.  Let’s get to it.Sheamus will beat Damien Sandow because that’s what he does.  Nothing else to say.

Starting with the main event, I’ll go with Cena over Ryback.  This match is designed to have Cena go over a monster and look strong in the process.  The fact taht Ryback will have lost for the tenth straight month of PPVs in a row is an afterthought but Ryback means nothing anyway.  Cena wins the first fall, Ryback wins the second, Cena wins the third.  There’s nothing much to the match but it should be a fun garbage brawl.

Punk returns for the win to a big reaction from the hometown fans.  The interesting questions here are whether Punk shows up as well as what reaction Jericho will get.  Punk will clearly be the top star there, but can you imagine a bunch of smarks booing Chris Jericho?  The match should be awesome and Punk coming back is a big deal so this should be good.

I’ll take Shield to keep all of their titles with Orton taking the fall for the challengers.  Bryan is on fire but a tag title would be back to what he’s been doing for the better part of a year.  Kane will be a good first victim for Ambrose in his title reign.  The matches should be good and they’ve been well built up over the last few months.

Axel to win the title, which will be yet another death knell in his WWE run.  Miz continues to be nothing special in his face role, although I am glad to see the Skull Crushing Finale making a comeback.

AJ wins the title she should have won six months ago.

Ziggler retains the title as well to finally finish Del Rio.

Overall Payback should be entertaining but the numbers are going to SUCK.  No one is interested in the show because the world title has been a complete afterthought, making Punk vs. Jericho the default main event.  I don’t think anyone gives Ryback a chance but he has been doing better with his promos lately.

Smackdown
Date: June 14, 2013
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Payback tonight so hopefully we can get to some more interesting stuff soon after this. The main story tonight is the continued rise of Daniel Bryan in his war against the Shield. Other than that Dolph Ziggler is back and will be in the ring on Sunday, meaning we may get a warmup match for him tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on Ziggler returning in a tag match with Langston to face Jericho and Del Rio. We also focus on Shield vs. HELL NO/Orton in a six man tag tonight.

Here’s an upset Daniel Bryan to open the show. If you had asked him when he debuted in the WWE if he would be world champion, he would have said YES. If you had asked him if he would lose the belt in 18 seconds, the answer would be NO. YES he could win the tag titles with anyone, but NO he didn’t think he’d spend nine months teaming with Kane. Either way, HELL NO is one of the best tag teams in WWE history, so Bryan asks kane to come out here.

Kane says all he cares about is the six man tag tonight. Bryan thinks they need to get everything out in the open because the last nine months were awesome. They’ve become a better team and better friends over the last few months, but on Sunday they’re not going to be teaming together. After that, they’re not going to be a team anymore because Bryan is going to win the tag titles with Randy Orton to make Team RK-NO!

Kane doesn’t see why Bryan is getting this excited because no one can beat the Shield and Bryan and Orton can’t get along. Bryan says he’ll prove he isn’t the weak link because he and Randy will do something that HELL NO could never do. Kane asks if he’s the weak link but Bryan won’t answer. He finally admits that Kane is the weak link and is grabbed around the throat. Cue Orton to keep Kane from killing his partner. If Kane chokeslams Bryan then it’s going to cause an RKO.

Bryan gets mad at Orton for meddling in his business but Orton says he’s just helping his partner. Kane goes to leave so Bryan says go run off like you always do. All three are about to fight when Shield shows up on screen and tells them to keep fighting. They’d be fighting too if the Shield had beaten them up for six months. Ambrose asks if they believe in the Shield after every super team has been beaten. Orton and HELL NO argues a bit more in the ring.

Sheamus vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro gets the jobber entrance in case there were a few people that thought he had a chance. Before the match Sandow comes out to say that he’s already humiliated Sheamus physically and intellectually, so Sunday will be Sheamus’ Irish wake. Cesaro takes Sheamus into the corner and slaps him in the face before hiding on the floor. Back in and Sheamus pounds on him in the corner before taking him down with a clothesline. A tilt-a-whirl powerslam gets two on Antonio as Zeb Colter rants on the WWE App.

Cesaro comes back with the gutwrench suplex and a big forearm sends Sheamus to the floor. Sheamus catches a diving Cesaro coming off the apron and rams him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Sheamus getting two off a backbreaker before they head to floor. Cesaro rams him into the steps before hooking a chinlock back inside. Sheamus fights up and hits some running forearms, only to be taken down by a European uppercut for two.

A double stomp to the chest gets two for Antonio but Sheamus sends him to the apron for the ten forearms to the chest. The Irish Curse gets two back inside but Cesaro comes back with the modified Angle Slam (looked more like an AA here) for two. Cesaro shoves Sheamus into the corner but the Celt comes out with the Brogue Kick for the pin at 7:26 shown of 10:56.

Rating: C. Cesaro has the same problem that Rhodes, Sandow or almost anyone else that faces Sheamus runs into: Sheamus hardly ever loses so it’s hard to get into the matches as a result. The Brogue Kick out of the corner looked good but it’s supposed to set up a match on Sunday that no one cares to see.

Post match Sandow jumps Sheamus from behind and lays him out.

The Wyatt Family is still coming.

CM Punk is returning on Sunday.

Teddy Long plugs Hardee’s for sponsoring the show tonight. Ziggler and company come in and make fun of Teddy for his poor handling of Smackdown. Langston steals the burger.

Great Khali vs. Heath Slater

McIntyre is in different attire tonight. Khali pounds away to start but has to swat away the other Band members. Slater gets in some shots in the corner but gets caught with the big chop. Khali has to go after the other Band members again, allowing Slater to hit a DDT for the pin at 2:20.

Alberto Del Rio/Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

Del Rio wants to start with Ziggler but gets Langston instead. Big E. takes him into the corner and pounds away with shoulder blocks, only to have Del Rio come back with a running enziguri. Off to Jericho to pound away on the big man and hit an enziguri of his own. Langston takes him down and brings in the world champion for the first time in over a month. Dolph drops an elbow drop for two and brings in Langston to face Del Rio. A backstabber puts Big E. down and it’s back to Dolph who immediately runs away.

We take a break and come back with Jericho sending Langston into the steps. AJ interferes with a slap to Chris’ face, allowing Langston to run Jericho over. Back in and Ziggler drops Jericho with a neckbreaker for two. Ziggler misses a charge into the corner and it’s hot tag off to Alberto. Everything breaks down Langston runs Alberto over. A dropkick puts Alberto down but he rolls up Ziggler for the pin at 8:10 shown of 11:40.

Rating: C+. This was a fine return for Ziggler but the feud was built up enough for Sunday without having Ziggler lose in his comeback match. I get the idea of Del Rio pinning the champion, but he didn’t need to do it. Jericho was just kind of there but he’s perfect for filling in a spot like this.

We recap the opening segment.

Jericho says he’s going to be ready for Punk on Sunday and goes over his history in Chicago. Heyman comes in and says that Jericho can claim to be the best in the world until Punk pins him or makes him tap out at Payback.

Video on Kaitlyn’s secret admirer being revealed on Monday.

Kaitlyn vs. Aksana

Kaitlyn goes right at her and pounds away before the bell. The referee tries to pull her off and takes a quick beating as well. Aksana finally runs away so no match.

Recap of Ryback vs. Cena over the last few weeks with a focus on the events of Raw.

Curtis Axel vs. Wade Barrett

Non-title of course. Before the match, Barrett wants to have a businessman to businessman with Heyman. He doesn’t know why this match is happening as he could injure Axel on Sunday, thereby taking away his title shot. Wouldn’t it make sense to save this until Sunday? Cue Miz to say really a lot and make some thinly veiled gay jokes. Barrett pounds away to start but gets caught by a dropkick for two. They head to the floor where Axel blasts Miz in the face for no apparent reason. As they come back in, Axel hits a horrible looking McGillicutter for the pin at 2:05.

Post match Miz lays out Axel.

Video on the Wyatt Family with Bray quoting the Bible and talking about the riddles of your mind.

Shield vs. HELL NO/Randy Orton

Rollins starts with Bryan and pounds him down into the corner, only to have Bryan come back with kicks to the chest of his own. Kane comes in with a low dropkick and suplex for two each. Off to Orton for some headbutts to Ambrose in the corner before it’s back to Bryan. Rollins comes in and fires off elbows to the head before Ambrose gets the tag for a dragon sleeper. Bryan hits some knees to the head and one to the ribs to escape before bringing Orton back in to clean house.

Ambrose and Rollins break up the Elevated DDT before Rollins hits an enziguri for two. We take a break and come back with Orton being elbowed down for two. It’s back to Reigns who pounds on Orton’s head but gets caught in the Orton backbreaker to give Randy a breather. Reigns misses a charge into the post and it’s off to Kane vs. Ambrose with the big man getting two off a side slam.

Kane misses the top rope clothesline and stumbled into the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel hits the springboard missile dropkick on Ambrose and gives Reigns and Rollins a dropkick each. FLYING GOAT puts the tag champions and Rollins takes a pair of dropkicks in the corner for two. Bryan kicks the tag champions down again but can only get two on Seth.

Ambrose delays the swan dive and allows Rollins to roll away at the last minute. Kane and Ambrose go to the floor but Reigns spears Orton down. Kane avoids a spear from Roman and chokeslams Dean onto Reigns on the floor. Rollins hits the buckle bomb but Kane shoves him off the top into the RKO. Bryan throws on the NO Lock and THEY DID IT! Rollins taps out at 13:48 and the Shield loses for the first time ever.

Rating: B+. The ending was INSANE and a great bit of storytelling as HELL NO and Orton finally learned from their past mistakes and made the adjustments to beat the Shield. That is a huge win for Bryan as he is looking more and more like a star every day. They had to lose eventually and while I’d question doing it on Smackdown, the moment was awesome and the place went nuts at the ending.

Lillian announces it as the first time the Shield has ever lost a six man tag as the winners celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This is the kind of wrestling centered show that Smackdown needs to be. Tonight was about longer matches which built up the matches on Sunday. I’m not sure on having Shield lose here, but it certainly launches Bryan up the charts and gives him his biggest win in a very long time. Payback is going to do horrible numbers due to the lame build, but tonight was a good show.

Results

Sheamus b. Antonio Cesaro – Brogue Kick

Heath Slater b. Great Khali – DDT

Alberto Del Rio/Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

Curtis Axel b. Wade Barrettl – McGillicutter

HELL NO/Randy Orton b. Shield – NO Lock to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 5, 2000
Location: War Memorial Auditorium, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re just after Judgment Day, meaning HHH has won the world title back from the Rock in an Iron Man match due to interference from the returning Undertaker. Other than that we’ve got Benoit and Jericho feuding over the IC Title, which is par for the course for the two of them. The company is on fire at this point and hitting on all cylinders so this should be an awesome show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of Undertaker earning a shot at HHH by winning a handicap match against X-Pac and Road Dogg. This was followed later in the night by Rock beating Edge and Christian to become #1 contender. The main event of the show was Kane pinning HHH to earn a world title shot. In other words, there are three #1 contenders.

In the arena tonight, Vince blames HHH and wants to know why Hardcore Champion Gerald Brisco isn’t carrying his bag.

Theme song.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to open things up. HHH tells the fans to shut up so he can talk about how hot the competition is for his world title. The fans chant for Rocky as HHH talks about how much it means to be world champion. It means that you have beaten the very best and right now, there are three people that are the #1 contender to the title. The fans chant some very rude things at Stephanie to make HHH even angrier. HHH cuts them off by talking about how competition turns him on.

On the other hand, big egos turn him off. Yeah he has a huge ego, but when you’re as good as HHH, it’s hard not to think so highly of yourself. However, his ego is nothing compared to the man with the huge grapefruits: Vince. The talk of his own fruits brings out Vince to take the mic from his son-in-law. Vince agrees that HHH is indeed good but his biggest accomplishment is marrying Stephanie. It was Vince that made HHH and it’s Vince that can break him.

HHH says that while Vince may be Dr. Frankenstein, the monster can take over any time. He beat up Vince at Armageddon back in December and he can do it again. HHH slaps Vince and there goes the suit jacket. The brawl is about to be on but here’s Shane to break it up. Shane blames the two of them for there being three #1 contenders. It was HHH that made the matches and it was Vince’s ego that makes him want to fight HHH. Shane thinks maybe he should run the company and gets punched down for that line of thinking. All three guys get slaps from Stephanie and here’s Rock to slowly rotate his head.

Rock talks about not seeing a family feud, a millionaire, or even the WWF Champion. Instead he sees three pieces of monkey crap being slapped around by a woman who only costs about $2. Aside from that though, Rock is one of the three #1 contenders and he wants that title shot tonight. If that doesn’t happening, then Rock will just come down there right now and beat HHH all over Rochester.

Rock heads to the ring but gets stopped by Kane’s fires. Kane says that he’s the #1 contender (mixed reaction) and he wants his title shot tonight. As Kane walks towards the ring, here’s his big brother to the Kid Rock theme. Taker doesn’t care about anyone else’s issues because he wants a title match tonight, even if it means fighting with all of the three #1 contenders at once. Vince thinks all three should get their shots tonight, but first of all there’s going to be a triple threat between the three #1 contenders. The winner gets their title shot later tonight. The segment was good but it didn’t need to be twenty five minutes long.

Rikishi/Too Cool vs. T&A/Val Venis

Too Cool are tag team champions here. That’s one of the great things about this time period: Too Cool got WAY over while feuding with the Radicals over the spring and the company saw potential in them. Instead of jobbing them out for months, they gave them the tag titles at the end of May as a reward, while also giving them extra credibility. Today you would see them jobbed out in stupid comedy matches or left off television entirely for getting over against the writers’ wishes. I mean, why would you want to have the wrestlers get over themselves, therefore doing the writers’ work for them?

Test and Scotty start things off with Mr. Hotty clotheslining Test down and bringing in Grandmaster for their double elbow. Albert (Tensai) comes in and tries to ram Grandmaster into the buckle but pulls his hat off instead. A middle rope dropkick puts Albert down and it’s off to Val vs. Rikishi, but the other big men triple team the Samoan down. Albert tries a sunset flip but Rikishi sits his 400lbs down on his chest. Everything breaks down and Scotty hits the Worm on Test, followed by the Hip Hop Drop (top rope legdrop) but there’s no referee. In the confusion, Val hits Grandmaster with a title belt for the pin.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything for me although I forgot how stunning Trish was at this point. I’m also not clear on the reason behind having Too Cool win the titles last week and then lose in a six man here. The match wasn’t much but it would set up two different feuds in the future so it’s not all bad.

Post match Rikishi cleans house and gives Trish a Stinkface.

The McMahons and company reconcile in the back. Brisco slams a door on Crash Holly as he tries to sneak up on him with a chair to win the Hardcore Title.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Road Dogg vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is Intercontinental Champion. X-Pac trips up Benoit to give Roadie a quick advantage but Benoit fires back with right hands and the back elbow to take Road Dogg down. Benoit loads up the swan dive but a Tori distraction lets X-Pac make the save. Not that it matters as the Dudleys run out to distract Dogg, allowing Benoit to hit a German suplex for the pin. This wasn’t even two minutes long.

Post match the Dudleys load up a 3D to put Tori through a table but X-Pac makes the save.

Brisco talks with Patterson about how they’re still friends despite feuding over the Hardcore Title. Crash sneaks in again and hits Patterson by mistake.

Kane says there are no allies or brothers in the triple threat

Here’s Crash to challenge Brisco to a fight RIGHT NOW.

Hardcore Title: Gerald Brisco vs. Crash

Gerald comes out to Real American in a funny running gag. Crash pounds away on the floor to start before bringing in all the usual weapons. A trashcan lid puts Brisco down but here’s Patterson with his soiled underwear, which wind up around Brisco’s face. Brisco gets up a boot in the corner to put Crash down and both Stooges dive on top to retain Gerald’s title.

Undertaker says Kane is right about there being no friends or brothers in the match tonight.

Kane vs. Undertaker vs. The Rock

HHH comes out to do commentary as the winner of this gets a title match later tonight. Rock and Undertaker slug it out to start but Kane helps his brother to pound Rock down in the corner. Rock hits Kane low to take him down and hits a Rock Bottom out of nowhere on Undertaker. Kane pops right back up with a chokeslam for two on Rock but it’s time for the brothers to fight.

Undertaker knocks Kane to the floor but Rock is back up with right hands to the dead man. All three head outside now with Rock being double teamed until HHH jumps Undertaker. HHH sends Kane into the steps as well but Undertaker is back up and goes after Rock again before dropping HHH with a right hand. HHH blasts Kane with a chair which knocks him into a quick Rock Bottom on Kane sends Rock to the title match.

Rating: D+. It was short and energetic but not much more. I get the idea they were going for here but you need more than four minutes for these three guys fighting. HHH going after Undertaker and Kane is fine, but why not go after Rock as well? The match was fine all things considered but with less than four minutes it didn’t have time to develop at all.

Post match HHH immediately hits Rock in the head with a chair.

Godfather/Dean Malenko vs. Chyna/Eddie Guerrero

This is before Dean was a ladies man so it’s just an oddball team. Eddie interrupts the Godfather’s lines to tick off the fans. This is the followup to Eddie costing Godfather a match against Chyna on Heat. Godfather and Eddie start things off with Eddie being tossed into the corner but Chyna blocks the Ho Train.

Dean comes in and counters a rollup into a wheelbarrow suplex for two. A rana puts Malenko down and it’s off to Chyna whose DDT is easily countered by Dean. The handspring elbow connects with Malenko in the corner before it’s back to Eddie. Dean hiptosses him into the Godfather’s Ho’s, ticking off Chyna in the process. Back in and Eddie counters a tilt-a-whirl slam into a small package to pin Dean.

Rating: D+. Again this didn’t have any time to go anywhere but notice again that they’re putting a bunch of different acts out there to keep things from getting stale. Yeah we get some repetitive stuff in the back, but it’s a bunch of quick shots instead of long drawn out segments to dull the fans’ minds. In short: keep things moving rather than constantly putting the same stuff out there over and over again.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Hardcore Holly vs. Faarooq

It’s a brawl to start of course with Faarooq pounding Holly down and getting two off a shoulder block. Holly is sent to the floor but referee Teddy Long holds Faarooq back. A clothesline gets two more for Faarooq back inside but he doesn’t seem too hurried to pin Holly. They head back outside with Holly being whipped into the barricade, followed by more standing around. Back in and Holly escapes the Dominator and hits a Falcon’s Arrow for the pin. Nothing again here.

Kurt Angle gives Edge and Christian a pep talk, saying that if they win their six man tonight, they’ll have defended Stephanie’s honor, which might earn the Canadians another tag title match.

Kurt Angle/Edge/Christian vs. Dudley Boys/Chris Jericho

Edge and Christian give the hometown of Kodak film a very special five second pose. Jericho starts with Edge as the fans are WAY into Jericho here. A dropkick puts both Edge and Angle down before it’s off to Kurt. The heels take turns pounding away on Jericho with Christian getting two off his reverse DDT.

The fans want tables but get a double headbutt from Edge and Christian for two instead. A catapult sends Jericho into the corner and it’s off to Angle to pound away. The fans still want tables and get a step closer to their goal with a hot tag to Bubba. Ray cleans house as everything breaks down. After Edge breaks up the 3D to Christian, Angle comes in with the Olympic Slam for the pin on Bubba.

Rating: C-. Basic six man tag match here with the crowd on fire throughout because of the tables. It’s amazing how something that simple can work the fans into such a frenzy, but unfortunately those chants would continue long after the Dudleys were gone. Jericho and Angle would have their usual awesome matches soon enough.

Post match Jericho puts Angle in the Walls and the Dudleys 3D Kurt through a table.

Hardy Boys vs. Bull Buchanan/Big Bossman

Bull starts with Matt and a big boot puts Matt down. Off to Boss Man as Lita is watching in the back, having not yet hooked up with the brothers yet. Back to Bull for a backbreaker but he misses a leg drop. Off to Jeff who speeds things up as everything breaks down. Jeff hits a quick Swanton on Bull for the win. This was nothing.

Boss Man and Buchanan fight post match with Boss Man laying Bull out.

HHH wants to head to the ring alone tonight.

Post break HHH says the Faction (that’s their actual name) is staying in the back tonight. Apparently Earl Hebner, who has had a lot of problems with HHH, is referee tonight. Cole also asks Stephanie why she never defends the Women’s Title. She says it’s because she has no contenders so here are Ivory and Jackie to say they’ll fight. Stephanie makes a #1 contenders battle royal for Smackdown.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. The Rock

HHH is already lying as Stephanie comes to the ring with him. Rock jumps HHH during his water spit and the fight is on fast. Rock pounds away and knocks HHH out to the floor before whipping him into whatever hard objects he can find. They load up the announce table but HHH fights out of the Rock Bottom. Instead Rock whips him over the announce table and hits the champion low.

A clothesline misses HHH and he comes back with a neckbreaker to put Rock down. Rock is sent shoulder first into the post before we head back inside for some stomping in the corner. Hebner gets in HHH’s face to give Rock a breather but HHH comes back with the jumping knee to the face for two. A knee drop to the head gets two more but HHH makes the mistake of going up top, allowing Rock to slam him down. Rock hits a neckbreaker and a Samoan drop for two but HHH comes back with a facebuster.

Cue the McMahon-Helmsley Faction to run interference as Rock makes his comeback. Rock knocks all of them off the apron before hitting the spinebuster and People’s Elbow, only to have X-Pac break up the count. The match keeps going though but the referee goes down. A DDT puts HHH down as the Faction comes in to destroy Rock. Cue Undertaker and Kane to clean house, including Undertaker chokeslamming Rock down. HHH crawls on top for the pin to retain the title and tick off the crowd.

Rating: C+. You can’t go wrong with Rock vs. HHH in the year 2000. The match was overbooked at the end but the rest of the match worked well enough given the constraints they were under. The fans were losing their minds for Rock here and those reactions would never quiet down. Good match here but they would have more masterpieces down the line.

Overall Rating: C. The show wasn’t all that great, but there was a notable energy going throughout the night which brought the show up a lot. That’s one of the things you never get today as everything is so tightly bound to the rigid television structure. This show felt like anything could happen at any time and it made things much more exciting. Good stuff here but there were far better shows around this time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 3, 2013
Location: XL Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators; Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

Back with more of the red guys here as we’re back in America this week. The main story is that HHH will be back in the ring tonight to face Curtis Axel, a mere two weeks after Axel did NOT put HHH on the shelf. This sounds like more of a storyline than a match, which is fine as long as HHH doesn’t kill the kid. Other than that we’ll get more Ryback vs. Cena build. Let’s get to it.

After a quick recap of everything that has happened to HHH in the past few weeks, here’s Stephanie McMahon to open things up. She talks about HHH getting beaten up by Lesnar and then collapsing during his match (basically saying what we saw in the video) before trying to come back tonight. Despite HHH being medically cleared, Stephanie is making a business decision and not letting him compete tonight. She knows HHH wants to fight Curtis Axel, “Who quite frankly is beneath HHH.” The fans chant for HHH but get Vince instead.

Vince says that HHH won’t be competing tonight and says that HHH has given everything he has to this business. Do the fans want HHH’s liver and spleen next? Vince reminds us that this is family entertainment and not a blood sport. Last week, Kofi Kingston was put through a table and the fans chanted one more time. There won’t be one more time for HHH tonight or any night, and Curtis Axel is still beneath HHH. Vince is then cut off by…..Shield?

Shield vs. HELL NO/Randy Orton

In case you were wondering what happened with the McMahons, Cole tells us that if you have the WWE App, you would have seen them leave the ring without incident. If that doesn’t make you want to download the App, I don’t know what does. This match is a result of Bryan cleaning house with the Shield to end Smackdown. A HUGE YES chant breaks out before the match as we start with Bryan vs. Ambrose.

Bryan hits his rapid fire kicks to the chest followed by some to the back before bringing in Kane. The low dropkick and the side slam get two for Kane as we see Tons of Funk and Ryder watching the match on the App. And it’s LIVE people! Another side slam gets two on Rollins this time but a Reigns distraction lets Seth dropkick Kane off the top as we take a break.

Back with Rollins cranking on Kane’s neck before bringing Ambrose back in. Dean pounds on Kane for a bit as well, only to have the monster hit a double suplex on both smaller members of the Shield. Hot tag off to Orton as the fans go NUTS. Randy snaps off some powerslams and a double Elevated DDT to Ambrose and Rollins but Seth breaks up the DDT on Reigns. Ambrose cranks on Randy’s neck for a bit as the match slows down again.

Off to Reigns for a full nelson to keep Orton in trouble. Dean comes back in and pounds away before handing it back over to Reigns for a chinlock. Randy rolls out of the chinlockery but it’s off to Rollins, who promptly jumps into a dropkick. The real hot tag brings in Bryan who goes nuts again, destroying everyone in riot gear that he can find. Some HARD kicks to Dean’s chest keep him down and a big kick to the head stuns him.

A top rope rana sends Ambrose onto Rollins and there’s the suicide dive to take out Reigns. The place is going NUTS for this. A missile dropkick gets two on Ambrose and there’s the NO Lock but Reigns and Rollins make the save. Everything breaks down and Reigns spears Kane down but it’s an RKO to Rollins. Reigns shoves Orton into Bryan though and the Bulldog Driver is enough to pin Daniel at 17:33.

Rating: B. The middle part was pretty dull but Bryan is the MAN right now and the fans are treating him as such. The ending to the match here is fine as Bryan was rolling but got beaten because of someone else on his team screwing up. As for Shield, are they actually capable of having a bad match? The more I see of them the less sure I am.

Post break Orton apologizes for costing Bryan the match, making Bryan yell at Kane. Bryan then goes off on Orton for thinking he’s the weak link. He thinks neither guy respects him, so Kane tries to yell some reality into him. Bryan says one match can solidify that he’s not the weak link. Since it’s clear that neither of them respect him, Bryan is going to beat the respect into someone tonight. Bryan is AWESOME right now and is totally nailing this character.

HHH arrives and goes into the McMahon dressing room, saying that he’s fighting Axel tonight. Stephanie tries to talk him out of it again, because Curtis Axel isn’t worth it. Vince says HHH isn’t being too cerebral right now and says don’t do something you’ll regret. Vince leaves them in the dressing room.

Usos vs. Prime Time Players

This is joined in progress after a break with the Usos (in face paint tonight) beating up Young. Off to Titus who takes I believe Jimmy down with a backbreaker before it’s off to Young again. Apparently the paint is to give the Usos an edge like their ancestors. Back to Titus for a front facelock and a cravate as Cole talks about being in Hangover III. A double tag brings in Jey vs. Darren and a Samoan drop takes Young down. The running Umaga attack in the corner gets two and the Superfly Splash ends Young at 4:49.

Rating: D+. I’m a big fan of the Usos and for the life of me I have no idea why they’re not on TV more often. They’re young, they have a good look, they’re part of the biggest wrestling family ever, they can move in the ring, they’re talented. Why don’t we see them on a regular basis? Samoans have been a fixture in wrestling for years so why not put them out there? The fans always react to the Siva Tao if nothing else.

Some Special Olympians are here.

Big E. Langston vs. Alberto Del Rio

For those of you counting, this is their fifth match (with the score at 2-2) in less than three weeks. Del Rio quickly clotheslines him out to the floor but gets taken down by a shoulder. Langston throws him into the barricade and runs him over again back inside. Del Rio fires back with some headbutts but jumps into a set of three backbreakers to put him right back down. Langston misses a charge into the corner and gets caught by a low superkick for two. There’s the armbreaker but Langston lifts him up and into the ropes for the break. Del Rio puts the hold back on but shifts the counter into a cradle for the pin at 4:49.

Rating: C. Del Rio continues to have chemistry with almost anyone he works with and Langston continues to show ridiculous potential. They need to get him away from Ziggler in a hurry as having him just playing a heavy is wasting a lot of his skills. The match was fine, but five times in two weeks is WAY too much.

Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow is doing commentary and reading a book written by Mrs. JBL. Sheamus throws Cody to the apron for the ten forearms to the chest but Cody runs to the corner to hide. Sheamus tries a kick through the ropes but gets his leg wrapped around the buckle that hooks the ropes to the post. A knee to the head gets two for Cody but Sheamus comes back with a release front suplex. The top rope shoulder puts Cody down but the Brogue Kick hits ropes. Cross Rhodes can’t connect and Cody misses a moonsault press as well. White Noise puts Cody down again and the Brogue Kick finishes this at 5:20.

Rating: D+. Remember all the complaints I’ve made about Sheamus vs. Rhodes/Sandow in the past? Go read one of those because it’s the same stuff again. That is all.

Post match Sandow won’t shake Sheamus’ hand so Sheamus punches him.

HHH is leaving but he’s not happy with it. He’ll fight Axel next week instead.

We look at Kofi being injured by Ryback on Friday and being taken out of action for a few months.

Bryan kicks a table in the back but runs into Ryback. Ryback insults Bryan for being small and they’re having a match later.

Vince comes in to see Heyman and Axel but is disappointed that we’re not seeing the rematch with HHH either this week or next week. Paul is ready to leave but apparently Axel is going to have a match tonight with John Cena. It’s No DQ tonight as well.

Fandango vs. Great Khali

The fans are totally behind Fandango here as both guys dance a bit to start. Khali takes him into the corner for some chops followed by some clotheslines. Fandango bails to the floor to avoid the Plunge and starts walking out, only to be cut off by Miz. Wade Barrett pops up to blast Miz with the Bull Hammer as the match just ends at about 2:00.

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Non-title again and Miz is fine after being laid out before the break. Miz pounds away to start but gets taken down by a big boot to the head. Barrett loads up the big boot in the ropes but is quickly sent to the floor instead. Back in and Miz gets two off a sunset flip before going after the knee. The Winds of Change get two for Wade…and here are Fandango and Summer for more dancing. The distraction lets Miz hook the Figure Four for the tap out at 3:27.

Rating: D. To any wrestlers that might read my site, I offer you a tip: if you make it to the WWE and someone offers you the Intercontinental Title, go join the circus as there’s a better future for you there. Also, can we please stop having the distraction lead to a quick win? That’s such a played out booking idea that I had the finish written the second Fandango’s music hit.

We recap the McMahon/HHH drama up to this point.

It’s time for the Jericho/Punk contract signing for Payback. Heyman is representing Punk here as you would expect. They sit at the table with Heyman listing off Punk’s accomplishments before Jericho cuts him off and finishes the list for him. Heyman signs and wants Jericho to sign so he can come to Chicago and be booed, heckled, and hated by fans that worship Punk because Punk is the real best in the world.

Jericho says maybe we should move the match to Summerslam in Los Angeles or to Madison Square Garden. Heyman says no so Jericho suggests right here in Hartford. Heyman says no to that so Jericho signs for Chicago. However he isn’t sure where we should file the contract. Jericho tells Heyman to stand up and open his jacket before filing the contract in Heyman’s pants.

Kaitlyn/Funkadactyls vs. AJ Lee/Bella Twins

Kaitlyn and AJ start things off. AJ backs into the corner and elbows both dancing chicks before bringing in Brie. Off to Naomi for the Rear View and a rolling senton from Cameron for two. Naomi hits the ropes with a crossbody and the Bellas take over on her arm. Nikki stays on the arm until Naomi slugs her down and brings in Kaitlyn. The reverse DDT only gets one on Nikki but AJ drops to the floor instead of tagging. The spear finishes Nikki at 4:32.

Rating: C-. That’s on the Divas scale so this wasn’t half bad at all. The arm work went nowhere but when is the last time you remember psychology in a Divas match? They’re to the point where they can get through a match without looking completely horrible which is at least progress. The camera shots of the girls didn’t hurt either.

Kane can’t talk Bryan out of facing Ryback tonight. Bryan tells Kane to stay in the back too. Kane says he’s leaving and to call when Bryan has found his mind.

Video on the Wyatt Family, talking about monsters being real.

Daniel Bryan vs. Ryback

Bryan pounds away to start but gets slammed into the corner. A boot to the chest puts Bryan down but a splash hits knees. Ryback pounds him down some more, only to be pulled into a half crab by Bryan. Daniel hooks a kind of Indian deathlock and pounds Ryback’s face to fire up the crowd. The moonsault out of the corner has Ryback even more confused but he clotheslines Bryan to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Bryan being slammed into the corner again so Ryback can stomp his chest. Off to a chinlock for a bit but Ryback misses a charge into the corner and hits the post. Bryan fires off some dropkicks for two but Ryback easily kicks out. A missile dropkick sets up a VERY long swan dive for two more. Bryan fires off the kicks but gets caught in a wicked powerbomb.

Ryback goes for another powerbomb but gets caught in the NO Lock out of nowhere. He makes the rope after a VERY long time in the hold and falls out to the floor but Bryan can’t follow up. The suicide dive is caught with Bryan being sent into the announce table. Ryback rams him spine first into the post over and over, knocking Bryan out cold. Instead of covering though, Ryback powerbombs him through a table for the DQ at 15:06.

Rating: C+. These two have some solid chemistry together as Bryan was doing a great job at making you believe he could somehow make Ryback tap. The one thing I didn’t like here though was the commentators saying Bryan could do the impossible. Bryan has won a Triple Crown and just lost a title two weeks ago. Ryback has won a total of nothing noteworthy, so why would it be impossible for Bryan to win?

Post match Ryback loads up another table but Cena makes the save. Axel comes out for the main event as we take a break.

John Cena vs. Curtis Axel

No DQ. Cena starts fast but Heyman trips him up, allowing Axel to take over. The Hennig neck snap puts Cena down and Axel demands a chair. As you would guess it winds up hitting Axel in the back and we head to the outside. Cena loads up the announce table but has to stop for the sake of the count. Back inside and Axel gets in a chair shot to Cena’s ribs and back outside we go. Another chair shot misses Cena and two more miss inside until Cena dropkicks the chair into his face for two.

Cena wedges the chair between the top and middle ropes but gets clotheslined in the back of his head to give Axel control again. Cena comes back with his finishing sequence, only to miss a charge into the corner and crash into the chair. He just beats the count back in but gets beaten down by a bunch of chair shots from Axel. The McGillicutter onto the chair gets two but the PerfectPlex is countered into the STF.

Axel can’t make the rope, but Heyman hands Axel an iPad to blast Cena in the head to break the hold. They head outside again but Heyman distracts Cena long enough to break up the AA. Cue Ryback to beat Cena down and drive him through the table set up earlier for the countout win for Axel at 13:00.

Rating: C+. This was a solid match and there was no other possible ending than the one we got. The key thing here was that Axel hung with Cena every step of the way and again Cena couldn’t actually beat him. This was exactly what they should have done as you can’t have Axel pin Cena, but giving him a win while advancing Ryback vs. Cena is the right call.

Overall Rating: C. This is a hard one to grade. The show certainly isn’t great, but you can’t really call it bad either. The main stories were advanced in a logical way, but they’re not what I would call interesting. There’s definitely an idea here though which is a big upgrade over some of the stuff we’ve been seeing lately. The in ring work continues to be good, but it’s the writing holding WWE back which is a bad thing. This show grew on me as it went on, which isn’t something I can remember saying in a very long time. Decent show here, but it’s firmly capped at that level.

Results

Shield b. HELL NO/Randy Orton – Bulldog Driver to Bryan

Usos b. Prime Time Players – Superfly Splash to Young

Alberto Del Rio b. Big E. Langston – Cradle

Sheamus b. Cody Rhodes – Brogue Kick

Fandango vs. Great Khali went to a no contest

The Miz b. Wade Barrett – Figure Four

Kaitlyn/Funkadactyls b. AJ Lee/Bella Twins – Spear to Nikki Bella

Daniel Bryan b. Ryback via DQ – Ryback powerbombed Bryan through a table

Curtis Axel b. John Cena via countout

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon at:

Smackdown
Date: May 31, 2013
Location: Rexall Place, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Josh Matthews

It’s the final show of the Canadian tour and the main story tonight is of course Shield vs. whomever they can find to face tonight. Other than that we’ve got Ryback trying to get people to care about his feud with Cena and the three guys fighting for the Intercontinental Title. Right now is a pretty lame time in the WWE as they’re in a very slow mode so tonight’s show probably won’t change much about that. Let’s get to it.

We open with a list of names that Shield has taken down in the last week. Tonight Shield is in singles matches against various people.

Seth Rollins vs. Kane

Rollins pounds away on Kane to start but all the speed only gets him taken down by a shoulder. Seth jumps over Kane in the corner but gets kicked in the head for two. A delayed vertical suplex gets two more for the big man and it’s off to the chinlock. The fans are really into Kane here for some reason. Rollins finally gets in a shot and goes after Kane’s knee with some solid kicks and elbow drops. Kane comes back with some right hands, only to have his knee kicked out again.

Rollins cannonballs down onto the knee but has a leg lock blocked before it can go on. Seth goes to the middle rope and kicks away a chokeslam attempt before hitting a tornado DDT for two. Back from a break with Kane slugging Rollins down and hitting the top rope clothesline. Reigns gets on the apron, only to be shoved to the floor. The distraction lets Rollins hit a dropkick, but Reigns’ distraction lets Bryan shove Rollins off the top and a chokeslam ends this at 9:22.

Rating: C-. For a nine minute match, this was pretty overdone. Rollins losing a singles match is fine because Shield is always about the team mentality. I’m not sure if they need to keep going with HELL NO vs. Shield at this point, but it’s not like there are any other teams worth fighting right now.

Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

This starts immediately after the previous match ends. Bryan sends Reigns into the corner and kicks away at the arm to take over early before tying his legs into Roman’s and dropping forearms to the face. The fans also love Bryan which isn’t all that surprising. He fires off more kicks in the corner before hooking a dragon screw leg whip to put Roman down again. Roman hits a hard clothesline to take over as we take a break.

Back with Bryan trying to speed things up but getting caught by another clothesline for two. Bryan gets all fired up and hits a hard set of kicks to the chest followed by a running dropkick in the corner for two of his own. Reigns drills him in the stomach to slow Bryan down but Bryan hooks the NO Lock out of nowhere. Reigns crawls over to the ropes but only gets there with Seth pushing the rope towards him. Kane goes after Rollins but hits Reigns for the DQ at 9:20.

Rating: C. This was a better match than the opener, but that’s likely because the smaller guy as the face is an easier formula to work with. Bryan’s kicks get more awesome every week and it’s very wise of him to use those as his main strike. I mean, can you imagine him throwing a convincing punch given his size? Kicks are far better for a guy like him.

Post match Bryan yells at Kane for costing him the match. Bryan is completely right here but Kane walks off anyway. Bryan follows, shouting that he doesn’t need Kane’s help.

Here’s Damien Sandow with something to say. He says that last week he proved that his mental strength is superior to Sheamus’ physical strength. Apparently Canada has limited mental strength because they gave away Wayne Gretsky. When it comes to intelligence, Sandow is the real Great One. To prove his intellect, he has a simple challenge in the form of a shell game. There are three cups and a ball on a table. The idea is to put the ball under a cup and shuffle them around. It should be easy to win, but here’s Sheamus to interrupt.

Sheamus congratulates him for tricking him with the knot last week, but now Sandow is out here playing with his little balls. Sandow lets Sheamus play the game and shuffles the cups pretty slowly. Sheamus guesses wrong, thereby renewing his idiot license for another year. Sandow allows him to try again with just two cups but Sheamus gets it wrong again after a lot of thinking. Sheamus wants to see the ball under the third cup but Damien seems reluctant. Fans: “SHOW YOUR BALLS!” There’s no ball but Sandow says it was magic, earning himself a Brogue Kick. Are we really building towards a big match between these two?

Curtis Axel vs. Sin Cara

Man they drop the level of competition for Axel on Smackdown. On the way to the ring, Heyman says that he always tells the truth about his clients. In his first two weeks, no one has accomplished what Axel has done. Axel says that Cena and HHH have 26 world titles between them, but in two matches he’s made HHH refuse to continue and made Cena get himself counted out. When you’re a Paul Heyman guy, life is perfect. Cole: “That was cute.”

Axel hits a quick backbreaker and dropkick to take over before ripping at the mask a bit. After a quick chinlock Sin Cara comes back with some kicks of his own, followed by a springboard crossbody. A Tajiri elbow is countered by a forearm to the back of the head though and a PerfectPlex ends Cara at 2:00.

Big E. Langston vs. Alberto Del Rio

Langston pounds him into the corner to start and fires off some shoulders, but Del Rio comes back with a kick to the ribs. Big E. drapes him across the top rope and Del Rio is right back down. Del Rio comes back with more kicks and a running clothesline, only to walk into a belly to belly for two. The Backstabber staggers Langston and a German suplex puts him down again.

A hard kick to the face gets two more for Alberto and there’s the armbreaker but Langston picks Alberto up to escape. Langston runs him over for two but gets caught in the armbreaker over the ropes. Del Rio falls to the floor and gets posted after an AJ distraction, allowing the Big Ending to finish Albert back inside at 4:50.

Rating: D+. This match is firmly in the category of matches we don’t need to see for a good while. They’ve fought something like four times in two weeks now, which is way more than any pair should be going at it. The match was nothing special either as they didn’t have time to go anywhere with it.

We look at Cena’s challenge for a 3 Stages of Hell match from Raw.

Kofi Kingston vs. Ryback

Kofi charges right at him and pounds away in the corner before getting two off a springboard dropkick. There’s the Boom Drop but Ryback catches trouble in Paradise in mid air. Kofi rolls through that as well and hits a middle rope cross body for two. Ryback blocks a kick in the corner though and slams Kofi down to take over. The Meat Hook sets up Shell Shock for the pin at 2:48. This was better than I expected, although Kofi injured his elbow somewhere in there and will be out 4-8 weeks.

Post match Ryback powerbombs Kofi through three tables.

Jericho talks about all the diseases Punk has from sleeping with dogs like Heyman.

Chris Jericho vs. Cody Rhodes

Jericho starts fast and takes Cody to the floor, only to walk into a front suplex onto the top rope for two. A boot to the face gets two more for Cody and it’s off to an armbar. Jericho comes back with a top rope ax handle but the Walls are broken up. An Alabama Slam gets two for Cody but he jumps into a right hand to the ribs. Cross Rhodes are countered into a Walls attempt which is countered into a small package for two. Now the Walls get the submission at 4:46.

Rating: C-. My goodness Cody Rhodes matches are hard to sit through anymore. It’s not that they’re bad or anything because Cody is really good at making his matches work, but there’s no reason to believe he’s got a chance. Cody hasn’t won a match of note in months now and it’s hard to care about watching him lose to anyone at all.

Wyatt Family video. These guys are awesome.

Randy Orton vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean takes it to the corner to start and goes Anderson by raking Orton’s eyes across the top rope. Orton comes back with right hands of his own in the corner, only to have Ambrose fire off some knees to the chest to take over again. They head to the floor with Orton dropping him on the barricade, only to be sent into it himself as we take a break. Back with Ambrose in control with knees to the back followed by stomps in the corner.

Randy comes back with a quick suplex to get himself a breather and they trade headbutts and right hands. Orton gets the advantage but has the Elevated DDT countered by Ambrose. Dean goes up but jumps into a dropkick followed by the Elevated DDT. Ambrose bails to avoid the RKO and here’s the Shield for the DQ at 11:55.

Rating: C-. Not much here but they were getting a nice flow going right at the end. The good thing about Shield is they’ve attacked so many people that you can swap in any combination and have a good match with them. Not a bad match at all and thankfully you never can tell if Shield is going to run in or not, meaning the endings aren’t obvious.

Post match HELL NO comes in for the save, with Bryan down almost all of the work himself, and Shield is sent running. A HUGE YES chant ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Is there any reason to watch Smackdown anymore? It’s nothing but a supplement to Raw as nothing significant happens here and all the good long matches happen on Mondays as well. The show isn’t even really bad, but rather really uninteresting. I need a little more fresh content than Sheamus playing a shell game with Damien Sandow. Shield continues to be a highlight and there’s some decent stuff in the midcard, but anything with Sandow or Rhodes in it is incredibly dull, although that can’t be blamed on them. Very uninspiring show this week.

Results

Kane b. Seth Rollins – Chokeslam

Roman Reigns b. Daniel Bryan via DQ when Kane interfered

Curtis Axel b. Sin Cara – PerfectPlex

Big E. Langston b. Alberto Del Rio – Big Ending

Ryback b. Kofi Kingston – Shell Shock

Randy Orton b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Shield interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon at:

Night of Champions 2010
Date: September 19, 2010
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

Since this PPV is all about champions, take a guess as to what it’s about. That’s right: pancakes. I prefer them with just syrup but some people actually like butter. I’m not a butter fan so I never use it. Ok the show is starting now so I’m out of jokes. I could go for some Aunt Jemima though.

One thing I wonder: what are Paper Jams? Paper related music? A jelly substitute made from trees? Wow syrup and jam already. Hopefully no one lays an egg or we’ll have a decent breakfast.  Let’s get to it.

I apologize for that joke. Even I thought it sucked beyond belief.

IntercontinentalTitle: KofiKingstonvs. DolphZiggler

If Dolph is disqualified or counted out he loses the title. Vickie does her intro but we get to look at Kaitlyn in a good looking dress so I can live with that. The music helps too. We get the two hands behind the head here which I like as a taunt for some reason. They have him in a black bowtie now too which makes my head hurt. Red tights for Kofi tonight which is a good look for him.

Feeling out period to start which is weird since they’ve had so many matches. The ring skirt has all the titles around it which is a cool look. Kaitlyn helps to get Dolph up and is yelled at of course. NICE neckbreaker by Dolph and a chinlock follows it up. The champion has half black and half white boots on which is different for him. He uses a big boot. Well of course he does.

Dolph hits a Fameasser which gets a joke from Striker. King audibly groans at it too which is the sign of a bad one. When JERRY LAWLER thinks your joke sucks, you’ve got a big problem. Lawler: Vickie used to be boy crazy. Boys would have nothing to do with her and it drove her crazy. Vickie is in leather pants which gets a lot of commentary for some reason.

And now Cole and Striker argue about who designed Vickie’s shirt. This is either really boring in ring stuff or really bad commentary. Given who is doing what, I think I’ll bet on the latter. Kofi hits a counter to get us to even again and here’s the comeback. Nice standing dropkick and he hits a Thesz Press. Wow I haven’t seen one of those in YEARS. Boom Drop hits and sets for Trouble in Paradise.

He does the stupid clapping thing where everyone cheers for him. Sleeper is blocked as Dolph uses it for a counter. SOS gets two as Ziggler gets his foot on the ropes. We’re cranking it up again here as I think I know the finish that’s coming. I’ll let you know if I was right or not. We hit the floor and Kofi is dominating. He throws Ziggler back into the ring to break the count which Striker says is smart. Cole of all people points out the reality: it was stupid as he would win the title on a countout.

Sleeper out of NOWHERE (which remember must suck since it’s a transitional move or whatever. I love the IWC’s idiocy at times) and Kofi is in trouble. He gets up quickly which is at least believable. I can’t stand when someone is in a hold for like a minute and then gets out of it. Kofi gets one of his own on but Dolph reverses. Vickie goes to smack Kofi but Dolph screams at her not to. Trouble in Paradise misses and Zig Zag ends this mostly clean which is surprising. I was wrong with what popped into my head but not entirely, but I’ll spare you the details.

Rating: B. This would be standard fare on Smackdown which means it’s very solid. This was another good match between them and hopefully this ends their feud which has run its course I think. Solid here and Ziggler looked strong, dominating for the most part and countering on a mistake to win it. Solid stuff but PLEASE get rid of Vickie as he doesn’t need her anymore.

Miz does an ad for Paper Jams, which is a music thing or something.

Edge says he’ll win. Nothing at all special about this.

CMPunkvs. BigShow

Ok, Punk HAS to win this or his year is more or less a lost one. He’s called the Second City Saint here in his hometown which is a rare thing in this company. He gets the hometown reaction which Lawler is surprised by. That’s ironic as Lawler has made more of a career out of one town than anyone in history. Punk says he loves Chicago but he hates the inhabitants of it. Is he a self-hater I suppose?

He manages to get heel heat here in a smark stronghold. That’s saying a lot. Punk wants to burn the city down and rebuild it into a straightedge utopia. That’s a great line actually. Punk tops that by saying if he’s facing the Giant then he is David and his slingshot is the almighty straightedge. I already live such a lifestyle but I want to join him anyway. Punk with the headband is still weird looking.

Cole calls Show a knucklehead, and wouldn’t you know that’s the title of his upcoming film. Cole says a headbutt from Show is like taking a cinderblock and breaking it over the opponent’s head. WHY DOES HE KNOW WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE? Big chop sends Punk to the floor. PUNK USED A FREAKING BIG BOOT. He follows it up with a slingshot senton bomb over the top to the floor in a nice spot.

Punk has him down but one punch slows him down. Middle rope elbow gives Punk the advantage back. They’re pacing this differently which is working well. Punk kicks him in the head which is a nice touch. Striker asks Lawler who the biggest man he’s ever been in the ring with. Of course it’s Andre, and Cole says that no one beat Andre. I REALLY hope he said that as a generalization and not literally because who are they trying to kid otherwise?

Show more or less tackles Punk out of the air and punches him for the pin. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Show hit two moves: the tackle and the punch. That’s it. That was Show’s offense. Punk DOMINATED other than that but Show hits two move to end it. I hate this company some times. How in the world can you validate giving Show that win that way after Punk killed on the mic? It makes Punk’s offense look pathetic but hey who cares? Show is BIG so of course he gets to win. Freaking joke man.

Rating: F. This was idiotic. Yes Punk is my favorite wrestler, but sweet goodness man: someone please explain to me why in the holy mother of goodness THE BIG SHOW deserves to go over him like this or in any way that doesn’t involve Gallows jumping Punk. Punk has been GOLD on the mic lately and yet his only big win recently is over Christian when Alberto interfered. This is so freaking stupid it’s unreal.

Jericho says he’ll win everything. You know the line he throws in there.

We recap Bryan vs. Miz which should be good. I’ve heard great praise for their house show matches and after Monday I’m legitimately unsure who wins here.

USTitle: TheMizvs. DanielBryan

Miz in blue here which works for him in a weird way. Riley is here with Miz of course. We’re told that Shawn trained by HBK which I don’t remember hearing before. Very well may have been though. Somehow we talk about Lou Thesz and Cole says he Googled all of his info. Can we get some talk about breakfast again? It’s far more interesting than this bickering.

Miz with a nice bow and arrow hold as the announcers keep up their whining. We get an explanation for the name LaBelle Lock, which is named after an old wrestler from the 30s. Well that’s better than nothing. Miz works the arm as Striker says he thinks Bryan is attractive. We get a shoulderbreaker and Striker gives a shout out to Double A (Arn Anderson) and says he should be in the Hall of Fame. Say it with me: AMEN!

The champ throws out a big boot as we’ve literally seen it three times tonight. Bryan with a suicide dive through the ropes to take out Miz. He SELLS THE ARM and hits a dropkick off the top for two. They slug it out and the selling continues. Let the boo/yay chanting begin! Running dropkick in the corner which always amazes me when someone hits it for some reason.

Miz kicks out again and Bryan gets a bit frustrated. We head up top and Bryan gets crotched. SWEET clothesline takes down Bryan who lands on his arm for two. All Miz here as he CRANKS on the arm and makes Bryan scream. Ropes are grabbed but Miz has til five. If he yelled that the IWC would have rioted. The Finale (not typing that name out) is countered into a rollup for two.

Riley gets on the apron but Miz punches him by mistake. Rollup by Bryan gets two and I would have bet on that being the ending. Bryan to the floor and Riley rams the post by mistake. Bryan STILL holds the arm. Miz just goes off on Bryan with punches but gets pulled into the LaBelle Lock AND IT’S OVER! Miz cries at ringside in a funny moment.

Rating: B+. This WORKED. I was way into the ending here as Bryan came off as awesome, just like Miz. I can’t wait for the IWC to complain about how Bryan carried Miz here and I can’t wait for it. Miz more than held up his half out there and looked great (just to be clear, Bryan was great here too). This was a very solid match but was held back by Riley interfering. Miz losing this way is perfect and it definitely put Bryan over. Very solid match and I was most impressed.

Hell in a Cell is in TWO WEEKS. Wow that’s dumb.

Cena is still all smiley and happy here and does a math themed promo which makes sense.

Women’sTitles: MichelleMcCoolvs. Melina

Michelle in red: DANG. Nice shot of her as the bell rings. Layla is ticked at her for being in there as we hear about the history of the Women’s Title, which is of course mostly nonsense but whatever. Crowd is DEAD. Yes, a Chicago crowd is dead. Michelle sends her to the floor but no one sends her back in. NICE Blockbuster from Orton’s elevated DDT position by Michelle. I love the Blockbuster (jumping front flip neckbreaker) so that was sweet for me.

Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) is blocked and Melina takes over. Decent belly to belly suplex for two by the blonde. Kelly gets up on the apron marking the first time they do anything all night as Melina has her rolled up. Kelly is for Melina here but just doesn’t get it I guess. The girls all beat up Michelle and send her back in. They need to stop slapping the mat as I think it’s a referee count.

Melina does the Matrix Move but Michelle just kicks her. Again: kicking and punching people works best a lot of the time. Both girls hit the floor as the girls yell at Michelle, showing off their acting…..talent. Layla interferes and Michelle gets to hit a, wait for it, wait for it, BIG BOOT TO UNIFY THE BELTS.

Rating: C-. Surprisingly decent match here although the girls were absolutely pointless out there. Layla interfering is fine as it’s expected, but what about the heat between them allegedly? This wasn’t much but at least it gets rid of the stupid Divas Title, or at least I hope so. Better than most Divas matches though so I’ll give it that.

Barrett talks about the Winds of Change. I wonder if he’ll Rock You Like a Hurricane.

We hit probably the longest recap ever as we set up Kane vs. Taker. You know this one by now I’m sure and if not go read my SD reviews for the last 6 weeks or so. We get the full history here over the last 12 years, including the straight up lie that Taker took Kane’s mask away.

SmackdownWorldTitle: Kanevs. Undertaker

Surprisingly Taker comes out first. They slug it out in the aisle to start. I want to see if they can break the streak of awful that their matches have been in the past. Taker shoves him off the stage into a pillar that the set is made of. The no holds barred aspect helps here as these two are designed for a big fight rather than just a regular match. So far they’re following that idea as it’s just a major fight so far.

Taker gets sent into the steps and Kane kicks him in the head. Why must you tease me with more big boots? Kane grabs the belt and hits Taker in the ribs with it which is a shot you don’t see that often. Clothesline off the top doesn’t get a cover as Kane does a really bad looking legdrop. Cole says Kane has dissected Taker. I guess we’re ignoring the first 4 minutes of this match.

Seated running one footed dropkick (just get to the freaking big boot you freaking teases!) hits as Kane is dominating. He takes the cover off the table and just pelts Taker with it. This has been a bit better than I expected and MUCH better than their other stuff. Taker sends him into the steps and has signs of life. Or is it death with him? His character can be a bit confusing at times.

Apron legdrop by Taker and for once the word vintage is ok. We get a mini Taker Dive as he sails over the railing to take down Kane. We head into the crowd as they’ve been in the ring about two minutes out of maybe 10 this has gone. Kane hits kind of a big boot. He hits a jumping punch as we’re back at ringside now. He punches Taker down and Taker is in trouble.

It turns into a boxing match almost with Kane throwing nothing but punches. Taker is getting DOMINATED here and it’s kind of nice to see. As long as he doesn’t make the comeback and win that is. Taker gets one punch in to a BIG old pop. He starts winning but Kane gets a knee. Jumping clothesline puts Kane down though. And now Taker throws punches.

Snake eyes and a big boot get two. We’re 5-5 in big boots tonight. Chokeslam to Kane but Taker can’t cover him. Striker calls him the weigher of souls. Could he be more over the top when talking about the zombie? Kane counters the Tombstone into one of his own and Kane wins clean!

Rating: C+. It wasn’t a great match by any means but this did what it was supposed to do. I don’t think these two can have a great match, but this is what they were supposed to do: Kane went out there and beat Taker up and then pinned him clean. That’s how this was needing to go and Kane gets the clean victory. Pretty sure we’re heading to Hell in a Cell with these two which is the next logical step. Kane needed this though and he got it.

Taker can barely get back to the locker room and almost has to crawl the last bit. I’d love Paul Bearer to come out here.

Randy says he has nothing to say. This takes nearly two minutes.

Legendary is coming to DVD already. That’s AWESOME.

We’re having a tag team turmoil match??? Hokey smoke. Someone made a thread about this and I didn’t think it would happen but here we go. The idea is there are five teams with two random ones starting. They have a match and then the winners advance to face the next team. Last team standing wins. It’s kind of like the weird cousin of the gauntlet match.

TagTeamTurmoil

We open with Hart Dynasty vs. Usos. Yeah because we haven’t seen this enough. Striker mentions playing a game called Six Degrees of the Hart Dungeon, which sounds AWESOME to a wrestling geek like me. DAVID HITS A BIG BOOT IN THE CORNER! Kidd hits a big Asai moonsault to the floor. Kidd gets the Sharpshooter but the other Uso hits a BIG BOOT to end him, guaranteeing new champions.

Kozlov/Santino vs. Usos now. This lasts about a minute as Santino sets for the cobra but Tamina distracts him, allowing a Samoan Drop (shocking right?) to end him.

Bourne/Henry in next. This shows how sad the tag division is. It truly does. Henry comes in and cleans house with the World’s Strongest Slam. Air Bourne ends it.

Final team is Drew/Cody. Ok we HAVE to have the heels win it here for the sake of sanity. Also so we can hear either awesome theme song. Drew is in those sexy white tights too so I’m happy. The heels dominate for awhile as Bourne plays Ricky Morton for awhile. They say Cody was a tag team champion but never say with who. I don’t get why though.

Big gutbuster by Drew as Bourne is in trouble, hence the Morton thing I guess. Drew CRANKS on a chinlock which looks awesome. Bourne gets out of a suplex using the ultimate counter: kicking his feet. Hot tag to Henry and Cody trips coming through the ropes. They go for the Super Shooting Star which takes forever so Cross Roads takes out Bourne (illegal man) for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. These are hard to grade but given who was in this the booking more or less was terrible. No Gatecrashers or Dudebusters or Nexus but Bourne and Henry? Really? The one good thing here is that they beat the champions clean the other night. That’s a major plus for them so there’s no argument that they didn’t beat the champions. Not wild AT ALL on having another randon team thrown together but that’s the nature of the beast in modern tag wrestling I guess. Pretty bad though and definitely the worst of the night so far.

Random Alberto Del Rio promo montage.

Build up video for the elimination match and I think you get the idea of it.

Sheamus says his usual stuff.

RawWorldTitle: Sheamusvs. JohnCenavs. Edgevs. WadeBarrettvs. RandyOrtonvs. ChrisJericho

Pin or submission only for eliminations. MONSTER reaction for Edge. The trenchcoat is back too. Face pop for Jericho but not as big as Edge’s. Barrett is in his second PPV main event less than five months after making the main roster. Not bad. Elimination rules here. Orton is out last and gets a nice reaction but still pales in comparison to Edge. Striker asks Lawler for strategy here. Lawler says avoid elimination, which sounds really simplistic but Lawler follows it up by saying you’re going to have a better chance with three or four opponents than with five so if you can hang on your odds improve. Sometimes the simplest answer is best.

Tornado rules here too which is nice. We get a Hulk reference kind of as Cole lists off champions. Cena and Jericho stare each other down which makes me think Jericho is a jobber by comparison. RKO maybe 90 seconds in ends Jericho. WHAT THE HECK? He makes the big sad exit and everyone, myself included, is shocked. Y2J chant picks up of course as I’d love a face run from him.

Everyone surrounds Barrett and the beatdown is on! Orton and Cena have an eventual staredown but Barrett breaks it up. Striker calls Edge, Sheamus and Barrett rulebreakers. CENA THROWS A DROPKICK! The superpowers fight it out but Barrett saves Cena for some reason. Sheamus kicks Barrett in the face. He dominates for awhile and goes around kicking everyone in sight.

High knees to Cena which I can’t think of a Too Many Lies joke for. Cena blocks the High Cross as everyone else has apparently died. Edge comes back in and stops the top rope Fameasser. Double suplex off the top to take Cena down for two. Edge and Sheamus work together which tells me he eliminates the Irishman.

Orton pops up for like two seconds and Sheamus takes him down almost immediately. Spear misses and the Irish Curse takes Edge down. Brogue Kick misses but Edge gets the spear. Orton takes one too but Edge takes a very nice FU to get rid of him and we have four left. Barrett takes down Cena and stomps the tar out of him.

He and Cena fight it out for awhile until Cena makes his comeback. 5 Knuckle Shuffle but Sheamus accidentally hits Barrett. Cole keeps calling the FU the A.A. now. Sheamus is in the STF FOREVER and has one of the best teases of getting there I’ve ever seen. He manages to do it and you can feel the crowd just stop. Nexus comes out and the distraction allows Barrett to hit Wasteland on Cena and ELIMINATE HIM!

Nexus beats down Orton and since there are no disqualifications this is all gravy baby. Nexus tries to run in again but Cena KILLS one of them with a chair. Orton gets the backbreaker on Barrett and an RKO gets us down to Sheamus vs. Orton. Brogue Kick KILLS Orton but it only gets two and a big old pop. High Cross is countered and the RKO gives Orton his seventh title!

Rating: C+. This was ok. It wasn’t the mess I thought it would be and getting rid of two people relatively early, especially Jericho, made this run a lot more smoothly. It’s an ok match but really nothing worth going out of your way to see. They went with the usual multi-man formula here which I’m not a fan of at all. Barrett pinning Cena clean is a good thing but it’s probably going to lead to a Hell in a Cell match which I don’t think anyone wants to see at this point. Fairly good match, but not a great one at all.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was definitely ok but it’s not a great show. The title changes are usually pretty cool and some of these were, but I can’t really bring myself to care about Orton winning his 7th world title. You get some good stuff like Miz vs. Bryan and Kane vs. Taker, but other than that this show really isn’t anything special. It’s entertaining enough for three hours and if you watch it you won’t be bored, but you certainly won’t be blown away. Not a bad show but not really good either.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 6, 2013
Location: Roanoke Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re closing in on Extreme Rules and tonight the main story is that Lesnar, Heyman and HHH are supposed to be in the building. It’s looking like that’s going to main event the PPV and I don’t think anyone really cares to see that. Other than that we’ve got more with Ryback vs. Cena and likely the triple threat match for what used to be the Smackdown World Title. Let’s get to it.

We open with the voiceover talking about Ryback walking out on Cena as well as Heyman and Lesnar at WWE headquarters today with the promise of footage later tonight.

Here’s Cena to open things up, saying that he’s way better than he was last week. He says he’s going to answer the fans tonight using the method of ancient master of Chinese Arts Daniel Bryan: YES it was a bad idea to wrestle hurt last week, NO it won’t stop him from fighting at the PPV, YES he’s mad at Ryback, YES he’s ready for Ryback to do the Fandango, NO the picture of he and Betty White is Photoshopped.

Cena says he’s the WWE Champion and it’s his job to get in the ring every week and perform. He hasn’t been 100% since 2002 but it’s not going to stop him from defending the championship. Cue Vickie to the arena for the first time in awhile that I can remember. She says that the PPV is going to be extreme, like with the cage match between HHH and Lesnar and the triple threat ladder match. Vickie brings out Ryback to get his input on the stipulations for the WWE Title match.

She asks both guys to say what kind of match they want. Cena says how about the winner is the one who runs out of the arena screaming, but that’s giving Ryback too big of an advantage. We could have a whine-off but Ryback would be too big of a favorite there too. We even get a Ryback impression from Cena, talking about international phone cards and fried green tomatoes. In short, Cena doesn’t care what kind of match it is.

Vickie tells off Ryback for walking out last week but says he gets to pick the stips for the title match. Ryback talks about how Cena’s Achilles heel is hurt but his real Achilles heel is his pride. It’s going to be last man standing at Extreme Rules and that’s about it. Ryback just leaves with nothing physical.

We hear about Lesnar and Heyman invading WWE headquarters. It comes off like a breaking news report from a news channel.

Randy Orton vs. Damien Sandow

Orton beat Sandow on Smackdown but after the match Sandow hit him with the Terminus, meaning we need a rematch. On the way to the ring, Sandow gives us a song, set to the beat of Voices and talking about how Orton never changes his facial expressions, is covered in oil and is an ignoramus. That was great. Orton jumps Sandow quickly and loads up the Elevated DDT, only to have Damien head to the floor. Back in and Orton hits the backbreaker and the circle stomp as we take a break.

Back with Sandow holding a chinlock but Orton standing up to escape. Some knees to Randy’s ribs set up the Wind-Up Elbow for two for Damien. Back to the chinlock but Orton fights up and hits some clotheslines. The powerslam has Sandow in trouble but he gets an elbow up out of the corner. Damien goes up but jumps into a dropkick from Randy, sending Sandow to the apron. There’s the Elevated DDT and the RKO ends this at 9:26.

Rating: C-. So to clarify: Orton pinned Sandow clean with the RKO on Friday and tonight he beat Sandow clean with the RKO. I’m so glad we got to see this match twice in a row with the exact same thing happening. That’s what I mean when I talk about lazy booking by WWE. We didn’t gain anything from this, we didn’t get anything new, and the writers get to use the same idea without thinking. They benefit while we get bored by these same two matches. Lucky us.

Big Show knocks out Randy as he leaves.

Here’s Jericho with what looks like a new light up jacket. He talks about Fandango, complete with a ton of plays on his name. Jericho has set up a table of judges at ringside tonight and it’s going to be him and Tons of Funk scoring Fandango’s match.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

The brunette dancer is back instead of Summer Rae now. Fandango’s entrance gets a five out of thirty from the judges. Fandango jumps Truth as he starts and dances a bit before putting on a cravate. Truth comes back with the front suplex and ax kick to send Fandango to the floor. Some splits from R-Truth combine for a score of 62/30. Fandango walks out of the match at 1:36. This was an angle instead of a match.

More pictures of Heyman and Lesnar at WWE HQ.

We look back at Smackdown with Bryan losing to Ryback and then being attacked by Shield later in the night.

Bryan says he’s fine physically. Make that fine actually (not a typo). He talks about how Shield is all about justice, which means he’s going to challenge Ryback to a rematch. Ryback pops up immediately and says no to the challenge. Kane pops up and says Ryback can fight him if he wants and I think the challenge is accepted.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title of course. Del Rio takes him down with a quick headlock and a hard kick to the back for two. Dolph comes back and stomps away in the corner before hitting a running splash for two. Alberto hits a running kick to the head/shoulder in the corner for two followed by the forearms to the back and the Backstabber. The champ falls to the floor and here come Swagger and Colter. Jack and Langston get in a staredown but Jack walks over to the announce table as we take a break.

Back with Ziggler holding a chinlock but Del Rio fighting up into a sunset flip for two. Dolph hits a dropkick for two of his own before dropping a bunch of elbows. Off to a rear naked choke by Ziggler but Alberto escapes and launches the champion into the air. Del Rio misses the running kick to the head in the corner but lands on Dolph, seeming to injure the champ’s head in the process.

Ziggler goes up for something and Del Rio looks like he tries the running enziguri again, only to hit a running fist instead. A reverse superplex to Ziggler puts both guys down and a hard kick to Ziggler’s face get two. The cross armbreaker goees on but an AJ distraction lets Langston break up the hold. Del Rio is launched into Swagger for the DQ at 14:53.

Rating: C+. This didn’t quite do it for me and the booking of the feud continues to bring everyone down. Swagger looks dominant tonight but on Friday he’ll likely lose a match while one of the other guys gets to look strong. This “everyone loses to everyone” booking isn’t doing anyone any good and I know WWE will be SHOCKED when Ziggler wins and still isn’t bought as a legit champion.

Post match Swagger runs over Langston and beats up everyone in sight with the ladder.

We recap Ryback and Cena’s segment from earlier.

More Lesnar photos.

Video on WWE’s deal with Yahoo.

Kaitlyn gets a text from the secret admirer with the other Divas being happy. It turns into a series of Simpsons references until Khali comes up. He’s going to be sent undercover into the locker room to find out who the guy is. They leave and the Bellas show up, seeming very happy.

Shield vs. Usos/Kofi Kingston

Jey and Ambrose start things off with Dean putting Jey into the corner with some right hands. Jey fires back and takes him down before Rollins tries diving off the top, only to jump into an uppercut. Rollins drives Jey into the corner where Reigns gets in some right hands of his own. Off to a chinlock by Rollins as Jey gets beaten down. Reigns comes in and chokes away before it’s off to Rollins for another chinlock. Jey finally gets up and hits a Samoan Drop, allowing for the hot tag to Kofi.

The Shield is knocked to the floor and there’s the Boom Drop on Ambrose for no cover. Kofi misses a charge into the corner but hits some pendulum kicks to Ambrose and Rollins. The springboard cross body gets two on Dean as everything breaks down. Reigns ENDS one of the Usos with a clothesline as Kofi goes up, only to be shoved down by Rollins. Ambrose’s falling bulldog is enough to pin Kofi at 6:45.

Rating: C-. Shield does not need to be used for matches like this one. They’re WAY too important for squashes over a team that shows up once every three months and Kofi. Speaking of Kingston, why did he have to get pinned here? That’s what the Usos are there for, but instead we need to pin the US Champion right? There were NO other options whatsoever in this match at all.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Zack Ryder

Cesaro looks like a typical Swiss man now and has thankfully stopped yodeling. Ryder gets hit with the gutwrench suplex and pounded down into the corner. Zack comes back with the middle rope dropkick and that’s about it for the comeback. The Neutralizer ends Ryder at 2:02.

Post match Cesaro says no one can hold a candle to him either in NXT or WWE. He gets Orton on Wednesday so I wouldn’t put much stock into his speech.

Now we get security footage of Lesnar and Heyman arriving at WWE HQ. A lot of these shots are the same ones we’ve gotten all day. Apparently he destroyed HHH’s office.

Here’s Heyman via satellite to show us the footage he shot of Lesnar at WWE HQ this morning. They go inside and see a Sheamus poster and some Andre the Giant stuff (“He’s been dead for 150 years!”) which doesn’t impress Heyman. Heyman and Lesnar go to the fourth floor (executive offices of course, complete with the full elevator ride) and get annoyed at all the poster of WWE Superstars with none of Lesnar in sight. Heyman: “Does anyone work here on Mondays?” They go into HHH’s office (Heyman to the secretary: “You’re not Stephanie. You’re much prettier.”) and assault some assistants.

Lesnar puts the replica World Heavyweight Title on his shoulder and puts his feet on HHH’s computer. Now he breaks the computer in half with his bare hands as this just keeps going. Lesnar takes the sledgehammer off the wall and destroys the desk and some chairs. Lamps are smashed and down goes a TV. This has been going on for like ten minutes now. Heyman leaves a business card and that’s about it.

Heyman talks about how HHH earned that because HHH hit a Pedigree on Heyman a few weeks ago. He holds up the crushed replica world title which is all destroyed from the hammer shots. Heyman talks about how he’s going to make Lesnar destroy HHH in the cage and it’s going to BRUTAL. Cue HHH to the arena as Heyman freaks out. HHH responds to all that by making bald jokes. HHH says he’s extreme too because he was in the Attitude Era. I hate that that time period is such an official concept now.

HHH talks about how his other office is here in the ring and it has a great view. He became a man in this ring which is something Lesnar never did. If Lesnar wants to prove something, he can come say it to his face. In this office, they fight back. That’s how this WAY too long segment ends: with a line that lame.

AJ/Bella Twins vs. Funkadactyls/Kaitlyn

AJ and Cameron start things off with Cameron being taken down with ease. AJ toys with her before putting on a cravate to slow things down. The crowd is eerily silent. Off to Kaitlyn to stare down AJ and get slapped in the face. The Bellas walk away, allowing Kaitlyn to spear AJ down for the pin at 2:23.

Here’s Henry with something to say. He says that he doesn’t have to pretend to be tough like Sheamus does. We get a clip of Henry attacking Sheamus a few weeks ago before Mark challenges Sheamus to a match at Extreme Rules. He promises to make people remember the match and here’s Sheamus to interrupt.

Sheamus says we only saw part of the clip and shows us him getting in cheap shots on Henry last week. Henry says Sheamus better be serious at Extreme Rules but asks to fight right now. Sheamus is ready to go but gets interrupted by Wade Barrett, who apparently is Sheamus’ scheduled opponent tonight.

Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus

This is joined in progress with Barrett holding a chinlock. Henry is on commentary as well. Sheamus fights up and hits a running knee lift as Henry says Cole is “ate up with stupid.” There are the ten forearms to the chest and Barrett is knocked to the floor. Henry gets off commentary and Sheamus teases throwing Barrett at him but stops, sending Henry falling to the floor.

A Brogue Kick lays out Henry and Sheamus goes back inside with the top rope shoulder for two on Wade. Barrett gets a quick small package and the Winds of Change for two each. The Irish Curse stops the comeback dead but the Brogue Kick misses. A big forearm gets two for Barrett but the Bull Hammer is caught in White Noise. The Brogue Kick ends Barrett at 4:45.

Rating: C. Both midcard champions job in the same night again. The match was the usual physical fight between these two but Barrett jobbing has become an obvious ending to their matches. Sheamus continues to look great in the ring as he has a style that is very easy to adapt to and can work well with any kind of opponent.

Post match Henry whips Sheamus with a belt, meaning we’re likely heading to a strap match. Henry: “I’m gonna beat you like you stole something!”

Jericho vs. Fandango next week.

Now we look at the Lesnar footage AGAIN.

Ryback vs. Kane

They’re doing the whole monster vs. monster stuff here with Ryback slamming Kane down and clotheslining him out to the floor. Kane comes back with an uppercut, only to be thrown into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Ryback holding Kane in a front facelock before hitting a Thesz press on the big red machine. Kane comes back with some clotheslines in the corner but walks into a spinebuster. A suplex blocks the Shell Shock but the top rope clothesline is broken up twice. Ryback pulls Kane off the top and into the Shell Shock for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as Kane barely ever got anything going. This was a step above a squash, but that’s exactly what Kane is perfect for. Kane can lose this same match thirty weeks a year and he’s still going to be at the same level. Those kind of guys are so valuable to WWE and they’re so hard to get your hands on. Kane and Jericho are certainly up there and they’re very big assets for WWE.

Post match here comes Shield but Bryan comes out to even the odds. Ryback bails so here’s Cena to make it 3-2. Ryback comes back in with a chair but blasts Cena in the ribs with it and lays him out to end the show. He never touched Shield but it didn’t come off like a conspiracy.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a pretty good show….until the Lesnar segment. That segment not only ticked me off, but it dragged this show WAY down. He destroyed the office and nothing more. Why is that supposed to make me want to watch these two fight on PPV or make me care about their match whatsoever? That story dominated the entire show and I can’t think of a single person who is dying to see them fight AGAIN. They’ve been feuding for a year now and odds are it still doesn’t end inside the cage. That’s all Lesnar has done for an entire year now and it’s such a waste of his time and talents.

As for the good stuff…..pretty much everything else. Well not the Ryback/Cena stuff which is showing how far Ryback has fallen since August and is clearly just a filler feud until Shield goes after the world title. Other than that though…..and the midcard champions both jobbing…..I was liking the show. Sheamus vs. Henry is a well done feud, the triple threat is at least getting some decent matches, Cesaro looks dominant again but he gets to lose to Orton on Wednesday…..dang maybe this show wasn’t all that great. The HHH vs. Lesnar stuff is just dreadful though.

Results

Randy Orton b. Damien Sandow – RKO

R-Truth b. Fandango via countout

Alberto Del Rio b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered

Shield b. Kofi Kingston/Usos – Falling Bulldog to Kingston

Antonio Cesaro b. Zack Ryder – Neutralizer

Kaitlyn/Funkadactyls b. AJ/Bella Twins – Spear to AJ

Sheamus b. Wade Barrett – Brogue Kick

Ryback b. Kane – Shell Shock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 1, 1999
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 16,566
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re a week later here in McMahon Land and the saga between Vince and the Undertaker continues. We’re also rolling towards Wrestlemania with Rock vs. Austin firmly in sight. Austin is back at the show tonight after doing media stuff last week. The card should start to fill out a bit more now that we’re only a few weeks away from the big show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Bearer giving Vince the teddy last week and Undertaker setting it on fire.

Here’s the entire Corporation to get things going. Vince talks about the end of the show last week and the one moment where he lost control. The fans aren’t pleased with seeing Vince tonight. He talks about how much he loves his family and how the fans don’t get that because they’re amoebas. That kind of embarrassment will never happen to him again, ever. Tonight, Undertaker gets a surprise as well which we’ll find out later. As for Kane, he broke a promise to Vince last week by losing. Therefore, Kane is fired.

The people from the sanitarium come out to get Kane but Chyna goes to the floor with Kane and beats up all the guys in the white coats. Apparently this is a thank you to Kane for saving her last night on Sunday Night Heat. Chyna says Kane can be an asset to Vince because she can control him. She’ll accept responsibility for him and he should get Austin tonight. If he loses, he can be fired. Vince says deal, but Chyna’s job is on the line too.

This brings out Mankind who still wants to be guest referee in the main event of Wrestlemania. He can prove his skills by refereeing the Kane vs. Austin match but Vince doesn’t seem interested. McMahon offers to let Mankind referee tonight’s main event if he can beat Undertaker first. Mankind accepts but there go the lights. Cue Undertaker’s voice which says he’s coming for Vince.

Ryan Shamrock is seen adjusting her short dress while leaving a locker room.

Austin is told he’s facing Kane and he doesn’t seem to care.

Intercontinental Title: Val Venis vs. Ken Shamrock vs. Goldust

Val is defending and this is supposed to have Billy Gunn as well but he’s got a lung condition or something like that. Val charges right in at Shamrock and Goldie jumps Ken from behind for some double teaming. Cue Ryan Shamrock as Ken gets caught in a spinebuster for two by Val.

Goldust takes Val into the corner and rubs his own chest, only to get caught by a low blow from the champion. Now it’s Val getting double teamed down in the corner but as usual Goldust and Ken get in a fight over who gets to cover. Goldie is sent to the floor but as Ken is about to finish off Val, Goldust kisses Ryan. Ken goes after him and both guys are counted out. In a triple threat?

Rating: D. As usual, more matches used to advance angles instead of the other way around for Russo. The idea is that Ryan has had moments with everyone and the question would be who would she side with at Wrestlemania. It’s a decent enough story that would be copied with AJ Lee in the year 2012, but things will get messed up soon.

Post match Billy Gunn runs out and jumps Venis.

Jim Ross is back from his bout with Bell’s Palsy (facial paralysis) and will return tonight.

Here’s JR (nice ovation) to interview Bart Gunn. JR asks him about his Brawl for All at Wrestlemania….before complaining about Bart not looking straight at him. Ross’ mouth is a bit messed up and he goes into a rant about being told he couldn’t be on TV because his face was messed up.

Bart wants to know what this has to do with him and JR rants more about how Bart Gunn knocked out Steve Williams. Steve and JR are friends so it was a big embarrassment to Ross. He shoves Bart and demands respect before slapping Gunn in the face. Gunn shoves him into the corner until Williams shows up to destroy Bart. Yep, they’re turning JIM ROSS heel. This would happen more than once.

D’Lo Brown is talking to Ivory in the back about something.

Tag Titles: HHH/X-Pac vs. Jeff Jarrett/Owen Hart

DX is accepting an open challenge and if they win the titles, Debra will disrobe. HHH and Pac clear the ring to start until we get down to Jarrett vs. Pac. A big heel kick takes Jeff down for no cover and it’s off to HHH. HHH misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Owen. Things are moving very fast so far here. A facebuster puts Hart down but Jeff breaks up the Pedigree. Back to Jarrett who misses the running crotch attack in 619 position but Owen comes in with a sleeper to keep HHH in trouble.

A jawbreaker breaks up the hold and there’s the hot tag to X-Pac. The X-Factor gets two on Jeff as everything breaks down. There’s the Bronco Buster to Jeff followed by another X-Factor but Debra distracts the referee. Debra gets knocked off and Shane McMahon pops in to send Pac into the steps. Owen breaks up a Pedigree as Ivory shows up. The match is finally thrown out due to all the insanity.

Rating: C-. I was digging this until the WAY overdone ending. It’s a four and a half minute tag match and we had two run ins and manager interference. Was there any need to have anything other than a big brawl to end the match via DQ after Debra got on the apron? Shane and Ivory could have easily done their run ins after the match, but why have a match when you can have multiple angles?

Post match D’Lo Brown jumps the tag champions and Ivory strips Debra down to her underwear.

After a break Debra challenges Ivory for later tonight. As in an actual match. I’m shocked too.

Here are Luna and Tori who are apparently friends now after last week. Luna says that now Tori is a fan of hers and Luna is a fan of Tori. They’re standing up for the fans that Sable has scorned to get to the top and tonight, Luna is bringing Sable back down to earth. Sable comes out and Tori turns on Luna about two minutes after joining her. Sable powerbombs Luna for good measure. Tori offers Sable a high five and Sable walks away.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Road Dogg

I miss these random title matches. They give you a reason to watch because while a title change isn’t likely, you never quite know. Rock pounds away to start but walks into a dropkick out of nowhere. Dogg gets a boot up in the corner but gets caught in a DDT for two. Here’s Paul Wight for no apparent reason as Rock keeps pounding Dogg down. They head over to the announce table and Rock does some commentary. Apparently when you check into the Smackdown Hotel you get a complementary fist in the mouth.

Back in and a Russian legsweep gets two for Rock and Paul Wight adds in a headbutt for good measure. A Samoan Drop stops Roadie’s comeback bid but Rock misses a charge into the corner. Dogg hits his usual stuff like the Juke and Jive followed by the shaky knee drop. Not that it matters though as it’s Rock Bottom and the Elbow for the pin to retain the title.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here but Rock was entertaining as always. I liked the idea here of throwing Road Dogg out there to make Rock look good. It’s not like Road Dogg loses anything from this because Rock is at a far higher level than he is, so why not give us something simple like this?

Post match here’s Al Snow (“A schizophrenic psychopath from Lima, Ohio whose hobbies are Hardcore Title matches and needlepoint!”) with a chair. He complains about Dogg making him job, but Dogg takes the chair away and cracks Snow in the head with it a few times. Hardcore Holly, the Hardcore Champion, comes out but gets a chair to the head as well. Dogg leaves, saying they can meet him in the parking lot if they like.

Chyna gives Kane a pep talk.

Dogg is in the parking lot with a broken broomstick and is waiting for Snow and Holly.

Here’s Public Enemy dressed up as the Brood for some reason. They say they’re not afraid of the blood….and there go the lights. They come back on and Grunge is alone in the ring minus Flyboy.

We go to the back where Dogg and Holly are fighting. After a break they’re still fighting with Holly throwing Dogg into whatever he can find at the moment. This isn’t a match of any kind. You can hear a bell ringing in the arena and apparently a match started while this was going on.

Droz vs. Steve Blackman

This is a kendo stick match, meaning you win by knocking your opponent off your feet. They hit each other a few times and head to the floor before hitting each other again. Droz is knocked down but there’s no referee. Instead Droz knocks Blackman down and wins in maybe 40 seconds. Was there a point to this at all?

Dogg and Holly are on a set of stairs now with Holly in control. They head up the stairs and Dogg is thrown out the door. Cue Al Snow to jump both guys and they brawl into the street (after looking both ways of course).

Video on Shane McMahon being tough.

We see Rocko strung up with blood all over him. As in I thought he was wearing a red shirt until I saw a few spots of white.

Here’s Vince for commentary for the next match. As he sits down, he casually throws out that it’s Undertaker vs. Boss Man inside Hell in a Cell at Wrestlemania.

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Vince still won’t answer what the bear means. They trade right hands in the corner with Undertaker hitting a running clothesline to take over. Mankind avoids an elbow and pounds away but misses a charge into the corner. Taker works on the shoulder which hit the post but as he launches Old School Mankind grabs the Mandible Claw.

They head to the floor with Undertaker being sent into the steps. Mankind hitting a running knee to slam Taker’s head into the steps and Vince sounds like a thirteen year old opening his first Playboy. Vince gets up for some reason, allowing Taker to get in a chair shot to Mankind’s back. We have a double countout apparently.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad for a four minute match and this pairing is always worth seeing even in the short form. Again though, this was all about the story going on instead of the match which gets really annoying to see after awhile. On top of that, Boss Man vs. Undertaker did nothing for anyone and the announcement didn’t help anything.

Post match Undertaker goes after Vince but Boss Man comes out with a nightstick shot to break up a chokeslam through the table. The Ministry runs him off so Mankind gets chokeslammed.

The Corporation bails out.

Ivory vs. Debra

Jarrett and Hart are ejected before we get going. Ivory immediately chokes her down but here are Terri and Jackie for the DQ. Jackie lost to Ivory on Heat last night.

Kane vs. Steve Austin

If Kane loses he and Chyna are fired. Austin goes right after him to start and they slug it out in the corner. A backdrop puts Austin down before he can even get out of his vest. Kane charges into a boot in the corner and Austin wraps the knee around the post. Austin stays on the leg and the fans are WAY behind him here. Kane guillotines him on the top rope and gets two off a DDT.

The match slows down a bit as Kane pounds on Austin’s chest on the floor only to be sent into the steps. Chyna hits Austin from behind and Austin goes after her, only to catch a charging Kane in a backdrop over the barricade and into the crowd. Well you knew we were getting some brawling in an Austin match. Back to ringside and Kane rams Austin back first into the post before dropping him face first onto the barricade.

Chyna gets in some shots before Kane slams Austin face first into the steps. We head back inside and a backbreaker gets two for Kane as the crowd has calmed down a good bit. Austin tries a sleeper but Kane is just too tall. Off to a bearhug by Kane but Austin punches out. The Stunner is countered and the referee goes down, but Austin escapes the tombstone bid and hits the second Stunner attempt.

Chyna breaks up the cover at two but Kane breaks up a Stunner on her. A belly to back suplex puts Austin down and here’s Paul Wight. The top rope clothesline hits Austin for two and Kane pounds away in the corner. The crowd is getting back into it again and there’s a low blow to Kane. Austin stomps a mudhole and hits the Thesz Press as Wight slides in a chair. Two chair shots to Kane’s head puts him down but that’s not a DQ. Chyna hits Austin low but that’s not one either. Now Kane holds Austin for Wight but the giant kicks the smaller giant by mistake. Austin walks out to end the show and Kane/Chyna keep their jobs.

Rating: B-. This was a rather fun main event as these two had some decent chemistry together. The problem for them is they never really got a chance to work together all that much as their most famous match is a gimmick match and all about drama instead of action. I likes this a lot more than I thought I would have.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a good example of the adage about Russo being true: when he has the talent to work with and someone to stop him from charging off a cliff, he would put together some very entertaining television. There were a lot of stories going on here and the build for Wrestlemania is starting to come together. The one guy being left out of it though is Austin. He hasn’t interacted with Rock in weeks, he wasn’t here last week and he was thrown into the main event tonight as a warm body for Kane and Chyna’s issues. That’s a really strange use of the top guy in the company.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Smackdown
Date: May 3, 2013
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We’re back stateside for Smackdown now with a main event of Ambrose vs. Kane. I’m liking the idea of the Shield having some singles matches as it’s the next logical step for the group at this point. You can only have so many three man combinations they can fight before the idea gets stale. Also we’re likely to get more on the triple threat title match at Extreme Rules. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw with Shield pinning Cena after Ryback walked out on Cena earlier in the night.

Here’s Ryback to open the show. He says he couldn’t tag with Cena on Raw because he knew Cena was hurt. Ryback isn’t Cena’s keeper and it was Cena that lost the match against the Shield. After the match, Cena was hobbling around and in the law of the jungle, the bigger animals like Ryback always eat the smaller ones.

Ryback vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan fires off some quick kicks to start but gets caught in the corner. Daniel goes back to the kicks to the legs but gets caught in the corner again. A powerslam puts Bryan down but Ryback spends too much time celebrating and gets kicked in the leg some more. Now Bryan is sent to the floor but he suckers Ryback down, allowing Daniel to hit the suicide dive. Back in and Ryback pounds Bryan into the corner but Daniel fires off even more kicks to the leg.

Ryback finally catches a kick coming in and shoves Bryan down. He loads up a suplex but Bryan drives knees upside down onto Ryback’s head to escape. Ryback will have none of that and throws Bryan to the floor as we take a break. Back with Ryback steadily pounding Bryan down, including blocking a sunset flip and slamming Bryan’s head into the mat over and over.

Bryan fires off about his seventh set of kicks to the leg before countering a Thesz Press into a half crab on the weakened leg. Ryback kicks away so Bryan goes with even more kicks to the leg to keep Ryback in trouble. A pair of running dropkicks in the corner stagger Ryback and a missile dropkick takes him down for two. The crowd is getting way into this.

Bryan tries another kick but gets caught in a powerbomb position, only to catch Ryback in a rana out to the floor. Ryback catches Bryan diving at him through and sends him spine first into the post. Back in and Ryback plants him down with a slam followed by the Meathook. Bryan gets Shell Shocked down for the pin at 9:39 shown of 13:09.

Rating: B-. This is what Ryback is perfect for: marching through people after being in some trouble. It makes him look like a monster again and was a completely clean pin. Bryan threw everything he had at him and just couldn’t stop him. That’s the kind of stuff you need from a monster and Ryback looked good in the process.

We look at the triple threat from Monday and Del Rio announcing the triple threat at the PPV to be a ladder match.

Ricardo Rodriguez says a lot of stuff in Spanish very quickly until Del Rio comes up to say calm down.

Fandango vs. Zach Ryder

Ryder takes him down with an armdrag for two but Fandango kicks him in the head to take over. Fandango ties him up in the ropes and fires off some hard forearms to the back of Ryder’s head for two. Ryder gets up a pair of knees in the corner and hits the middle rope missile dropkick for two. The Broski Boot connects for another near fall but the Rough Ryder is countered into a hot shot. Fandango’s guillotine legdrop ends Ryder at 2:20.

Kaitlyn is in the back with a bouquet of roses and has gotten a love text. Natalya and Khali tell her to relax like Khali does.

We recap the Make-A-Wish stuff with Cena from Raw.

Zeb Colter tells “Rhonda” Young that he was sick on Monday when he lost in the triple threat match. Also, Ricardo Rodriguez stole from him on Monday so tonight they have a rematch.

Ricardo Rodriguez vs. Zeb Colter

Ziggler and AJ are on commentary with Langston next to them. In other words, all seven people are here. Colter slaps him to start so Ricardo grabs his beard. Zeb goes to the mat on all fours so Ricardo rides him like a horse for a bit. Colter comes back with some right hands but Ricardo sends him into the corner. Thankfully this boring match is ended with Swagger running in to take out Ricardo for the DQ at 1:50.

Del Rio knocks Swagger to the floor and here’s Teddy to make it a tag match.

Alberto Del Rio/Ricardo Rodriguez vs. Zeb Colter/Jack Swagger

This is joined in progress after the break with Swagger working over Ricardo. The tag brings in Del Rio for the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and Codebreaker onto the arm but Swagger blocks the armbreaker. Not that it matters as Ziggler and Langston run in for the DQ at 1:50.

Now Teddy makes it a triple threat tag match.

Alberto Del Rio/Ricardo Rodriguez vs. Zeb Colter/Jack Swagger vs. Big E. Langston/Dolph Ziggler

Del Rio and Swagger start things off with Alberto dropping him down with a clothesline and tagging in Ricardo. After Rodriguez does little of note it’s back to Del Rio who walks into a dropkick from Ziggler. Off to Langston as our brilliant commentators talk about how Del Rio and Swagger are favored in the ladder match because they’ve both won MITB before. As their short term memory failure melts my brain, Langston runs over Del Rio in the corner and it’s back to the world champion.

Del Rio launches Ziggler into the air and lets him crash down to the mat. He’s too spent to follow up though and Dolph takes him down with a neckbreaker. Back to Langston for more of his power, including ramming Del Rio into the corner. Ziggy misses a splash though and Del Rio gets the hot tag. House is cleaned and it’s Colter left all alone with Alberto. Ziggler makes the save for Colter for no apparent reason and DDTs Alberto for two. Langston runs over Ricardo but gets powerslammed down by Swagger. Alberto enziguris Swagger to the floor and gets rolled up by Swagger for two. The cross armbreaker makes Dolph tap at 4:50.

Rating: D+. Well this was worthless, but at least we got the world champion to lose again! I mean, Heaven forbid he gets to keep the momentum he gained on Monday or something stupid like that. This 50/50/50 booking is doing nothing for anyone as the winner of the triple threat is only going to decide who didn’t lose last, which doesn’t make for much of a champion.

We hear someone getting beaten up off camera followed by Shield popping up. They say they took out Undertaker and after tonight, Kane will believe in the Shield. The camera pans down to show that it was Bryan who was attacked.

Video on HHH accepting Lesnar’s challenge.

Bryan gets looked at in the back.

Randy Orton vs. Damien Sandow

Orton hits a quick shot to the jaw and Sandow is frustrated early. A shoulder block puts Sandow down but he comes back with a knee to the ribs and a knee drop for two. Randy easily fights out of a chinlock (is there a bigger expert on that hold than Orton?) and there’s the powerslam on Damien. The Elevated DDT is broken up with a backdrop to the apron and Sandow guillotines him onto the top rope.

We take a break and come back with Orton suplexing his way out of a headlock. A short DDT gets a delayed two count for Sandow as JBL says Sandow has been in his element these last few months. Is there another modern Genius running around that I’ve been missing? Wind-Up elbow gets two but Orton fires off some headbutts to escape. A dropkick puts Sandow down as does a backdrop, followed by the Elevated DDT. RKO ends this at 5:05 shown of 8:35.

Rating: C. This is another match that we’ve seen over and over again with nothing much coming from it. It’s like everyone has a designated opponent anymore and the winners and losers never change at all. Nothing of note to see here but it was a glorified squash for Orton. When is the last time Sandow won a match anyway?

Post match here’s Big Show to tell Orton that he’s awesome in singles matches, but he’s terrible in a team. When Orton is in a team it’s all about him. At Wrestlemania, if Show had gotten the tag, they might have won and Orton wouldn’t have been knocked out. Sandow uses the distraction to hit the Terminus. Big Show laughs a lot and says that’s nothing compared to what he’ll do to Orton at Extreme Rules. I think that was a challenge.

Kane walks out of the trainer’s room and says he’ll make the Shield pay for what they did to Daniel and Undertaker. He knows he’s going to get beaten up tonight but he’s taking down as many of them as he can with him.

The Raw Rebound is the same thing that opened the show: the end of the six man tag and Ryback reappearing.

Now we get an arm wrestling contest between Sheamus and Mark Henry. On the way to the ring, Cole and JBL drop the names of famous arm wrestlers that no one will remember in a few seconds. Henry of course dominates but Sheamus wants to try it left handed. After a lot of goading, Henry finally agree. The fans chant for Henry as they’re getting ready. As he’s about to lose, Sheamus punches him in the face and lays Henry out with the Brogue Kick. The fans did seem to like the kick.

We get a clip of Shield taking out Undertaker last week.

Video on the European tour.

Kane vs. Dean Ambrose

Reigns has Bryan’s tag title belt. Kane swings his belt to chase the Shield off and throws Reigns over the announce table and Rollins into the crowd. Now we head inside for the actual match and Kane pounds Ambrose down into the corner. They head to the floor where Ambrose is dropped throat first onto the barricade and kicked in the side of the head before they head back in. A running elbow puts Dean down and Kane throws him to the floor again as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose working on Kane’s leg as momentum has shifted. Ambrose snaps the leg down and bends it around the rope. Dean says this is justice as he works over the leg. Rollins and Reigns are back up and talking trash of their own as Ambrose hits a running clothesline in the corner. The bad leg is wrapped around the post but the referee makes Dean let him go.

Back in and Kane fires back before hitting the side slam for two. The top rope clothesline puts Ambrose down and Kane is smiling evily. Ambrose escapes the chokeslam but Kane escapes the DDT. A chokeslam puts Ambrose down but Kane doesn’t cover. Instead we get a throat slit and it’s time for a Tombstone but Kane has to kick Rollins off the apron. They head to the floor and Kane sends Reigns into the steps. Back in and Dean takes the leg out before hitting a falling forward bulldog for the pin at 7:03 shown of 10:33. I really hope that isn’t his finishing move.

Rating: C. This was fine. Kane knew he was in over his head but he gave it everything he had which is the right idea for a match like this. A win over Kane is still worth a little something and the win for the titles will be worth even more at Extreme Rules. I’d prefer they went after the world title instead of the tag titles but I guess any gold is better than none.

Post match Kane tells all of the Shield to come get him and it goes exactly as you would expect it to go. The TripleBomb ends the show and Shield takes both title belts.

Overall Rating: D+. Let’s look at this: similar matches, similar story development, almost nothing new at all. This was a supplement to Raw and that’s exactly what Smackdown doesn’t need to be. Last week was FAR better with good matches and some fun stuf. This was basically there to further what we got on Raw while adding nothing new. That’s not an interesting show and could have been accomplished with a series of video packages, making this show pretty much worthless.

Results

Ryback b. Daniel Bryan – Shell Shock

Fandango b. Zack Ryder – Guillotine Legdrop

Ricardo Rodriguez b. Zeb Colter via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered

Alberto Del Rio/Ricardo Rodriguez b. Zeb Colter/Jack Swagger via DQ when Dolph Ziggler and Big E. Langston interfered

Alberto Del Rio/Ricardo Rodriguez b. Zeb Colter/Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston – Cross armbreaker to Ziggler

Randy Orton b. Damien Sandow – RKO

Dean Ambrose b. Kane – Falling bulldog

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at: