Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

The guitarist from Tool plays the national anthem.

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is defending in your standard Barbie vs. monster feud and has Eve Torres in her corner. Beth on the other hand has Natalya. Kelly goes straight after her to start and fires off some forearms in the corner to send Beth outside, followed by a middle rope cross body to the floor. Back in and Beth knocks her out of the corner to take over before we hit a quick chinlock. An over the shoulder backrbeaker (good move for Beth) has Kelly in trouble and Beth ties her in the Tree of Woe to make it even worse. Kelly gets knocked around in the corner but counters the Glam Slam into a victory roll to retain at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Total squash for the most part here with a fluke ending, albeit the same fluke ending to almost every Kelly vs. Beth match ever. Kelly certainly got her push because of her looks but she was getting much better in the ring near the end of her career with matches like this one being far more watchable than some of the disasters that the division hard around this time.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

The California National Guard is here.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Christian is defending and this is no holds barred but first the champ has a big surprise for everyone as he brings out Edge. After an insane ovation, Edge thanks the fans but reminds them that he can never compete again due to his neck injuries. He was kind of glad that he left when he did though because it opened the door for Christian to become champion.

Video on WWE taking over Los Angeles for the week, including an Axxess.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk finally escapes and puts Cena down for a breather, earning a loud CM PUNK chant. Off to a body vice as this match seems to be collapsing under the weight of the expectations from the previous match. Back up and Punk snaps his throat across the top rope to block a superplex attempt, followed by dropkicking Cena out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Punk grabs a seated abdominal stretch, only to have Cena power up into a spinning slam for a breather. Fans: “FRUITY PEBBLES!”

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Punk is defending and loses the title to an enziguri in eleven seconds.

A quick celebration ends the show.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2016 Redo: B-

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2016 Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2016 Redo: A

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B+

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2016 Redo: A

I think we can call this my definitive thoughts on the show as the ratings were almost identical in the last two reviews. Definitely check this one out.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2011-a-screwy-ending-isnt-a-bad-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: December 11, 2007
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

It’s the go home show for Armageddon and for once that means we have four ECW wrestlers on the show. Granted it is for a tag match rather than two singles match but I guess this is progress. CM Punk and Kane are probably going to have to deal with Big Daddy V and Mark Henry this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

CM Punk/Kane vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here too. Punk kicks away at Domino to start so it’s off to Kane for two off an elbow. The running knee in the corner into the running bulldog gives Punk two but Domino gets in his own knee to take over. Deuce hammers away and Punk gets bent over Domino’s knee. Punk low bridges Domino to the floor though and it’s back to Kane to clean house. The top rope clothesline drops Domino and it’s the chokeslam (as Punk hits the GTS on Deuce) for the easy pin.

Rating: C. This was just a warmup match for Punk and Kane and that’s all it needed to be, as they beat up a team who has the slightest bit of credibility left. I know Deuce N Domino might not have had a gimmick with the longest legs but they could have been around a bit longer than they were. Then again, it isn’t like the tag division has ever meant much of anything around here so their downward spiral shouldn’t be that big of a surprise.

Shelton Benjamin talks to us about gold, with people back in 1849 digging as much gold as they could. Those people only found fool’s gold though, while he gathers gold. Benjamin has won more than a few titles around here, and now he’s here in ECW and “there’s gold in them there hills.” He is going to grab his pick and shovel and dig and dig and dig because he is the new Gold Standard. That was about as bad of a promo as it could have been and I’d like to believe that Benjamin got a raise for trying to make it work.

John Morrison/The Miz vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Non-title. Miz knocks Moore down to start and some left hands knock him up against the ropes. Moore manages a quick swinging neckbreaker and it’s off to Yang for a dropkick. Morrison comes in and gets his legs swept out, allowing Moore to come back in and work on the arm. A double suplex gets two on Morrison so he and Miz bail to the floor, where stereo Asai moonsaults drop them again.

We take a break and come back with Morrison chinlocking Yang, who suplexes his way to freedom. Moore comes back in but gets slammed down for a crash. Miz’s chinlock doesn’t last long so it’s a double belly to back faceplant to put Moore down again. Moore backdrops Morrison down though and the diving tag brings Yang back in to clean house. The moonsault misses so Morrison rolls Yang up with his feet on the ropes but Moore makes the save. Yang rolls Morrison up for two but the flipping neckbreaker is enough to give Morrison the pin.

Rating: C+. Well that was about a mile better than it had any right to be as Moore and Yang were making the most out of the TV time that they had. These guys were working hard and they had a far better match than I would have bet on them pulling off. Yang and Moore aren’t going to be the next big thing, but at least they had a chance to do something here. Pretty sweet match while it lasted.

We go to a beach where a muscular guy is kicking sand on a less muscular guy. A bystander doesn’t thing much of this and buries the bully in the sand. The bystander says that sometimes there is trouble in paradise. His name is Kofi Kingston, and he’s coming soon.

Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly

As we continue Miz tormenting Kelly for daring to date Balls Mahoney. Kelly tries to start fast but gets forearmed down by Victoria. A headscissors sends Victoria into the corner but she runs Kelly over without much trouble. Layla comes in to stomp away and put on an armbar before Victoria lifts her up for a splash, ala Edge with Sable at Summerslam 1998. Back up and Kelly sends them into each other but Victoria is done with lowering herself to this and hits a faceplant. A spinning kick to the head gives Layla the pin.

Rating: D+. Well they kept it short, and that’s about as good as something like this is going to be. The match wasn’t much of anything because Layla and Kelly aren’t exactly good in the ring and there is only so much Victoria can do. I can appreciate them trying to do something new though, as it isn’t like anything else is working.

Matt Striker is really happy with the idea of Mark Henry and Big Daddy V. hurting Kane and CM Punk. I think V wants to eat them.

Raw Rebound.

Armageddon rundown.

Elijah Burke vs. Batista

Non-title. Before the match, Burke goes on a rant about how this is his yard and he is the new face of extreme. Batista isn’t wasting time here and runs Burke over to send him outside. Burke manages a posting and sends him back inside to stomp away, setting up a short DDT for two. An STO gets the same but Batista fights out of a chinlock and hits the spinebuster. Burke manages to knock him into the corner and tries the Elijah Express but gets speared (more like a running headbutt to the gut) out of the air. The Batista Bomb is good for the pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t exactly a match designed to be a major test for Batista but rather a way to get him on TV here. In other words, it felt like one of those matches from the very early days of ECW where a guest star would pop up for no reason other than stirring some interest. It helps that Burke isn’t going to be hurt by the loss so this was just a simple main event with a big name.

Overall Rating: C. That tag match alone was enough to make this an ok show and the Batista appearance helped as well. I like the whole mini merge between ECW and Smackdown, as ECW couldn’t do it on their own and Smackdown gets to focus on some different people on its own show. Not a blow away week here, but they’re getting some variety and that’s a great thing to see after so many similar weeks.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: December 6, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Florence, South Carolina
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re on Thursday here, probably due to some kind of a scheduling conflict, and that means a grand total of nothing. The big story coming out of last week saw Mark Henry attacking Kane and seemingly joining forces with Big Daddy V. Kane is going to need some help and maybe he can get that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Matt Striker is in the back with Big Daddy V and Mark Henry, saying that CM Punk now has no other choice. Punk can pick one of them to face and they will take his title. Isn’t that a choice?

Opening sequence.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Major Brothers

Non-title. Brett wastes no time in dropkicking Miz to the floor for a slingshot dive before Brian does the same thing to Morrison. A cheap shot takes Brett down on the floor though and it’s a double faceplant to drop Brett back inside. Morrison’s running knee to the face gets two but Brett slips out of a double belly to back, allowing the hot tag off to Brian for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down and Brian takes Miz to the floor, leaving Brett to get dropped throat first on top. The flipping neckbreaker gives Morrison the pin.

Rating: C. I like Miz and Morrison getting somewhere with the wins, but there are only so many teams for them to run over one after another. It makes sense to have Smackdown and ECW work together and it has helped, but as usual, the double Tag Team Champions deal doesn’t quite work in WWE. Normally I would say you would hope they could learn, but I don’t think I’m that gullible.

CM Punk doesn’t care if he’s facing Big Daddy V or Mark Henry because he loses either way. Armando Alejandro Estrada or Matt Striker can choose, because he’ll fight either of them.

Balls Mahoney/Kelly Kelly vs. Victoria/Kenny Dykstra

The guys start things off with Dykstra hitting a dropkick for an early two. That earns him the snap jabs from Mahoney so it’s off to the women. A very spinning headscissors drops Victoria for two and Kelly slaps Dykstra for a bonus. Victoria knocks her down and grabs a choke to keep things slow. Kelly fights up and brings Mahoney back in to roll Dykstra up for the pin.

Rating: C-. This would be your feel good win of the week as Kelly and Mahoney continue to have nothing to do together but they’re stuck here for the time being. The oddball thing was fun while it lasted but how far can you really go with something like this? Nothing match as you might have guessed, though what else could they have done?

Here is Shelton Benjamin to talk about promises. People are promised all kinds of good things, including him. He was promised that one day he would get his big break, because he is the Gold Standard.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Benjamin takes him down to start but a crucifix gives Yang two. Back up and a heck of a buckle bomb drops Yang again, setting up a neck crank to put Yang in more trouble. That’s broken up but Yang’s high crossbody is countered into a gutbuster. The jumping Downward Spiral gives Benjamin the pin.

Rating: C. The series of Benjamin squashes continues as they still need to come up with a name for that finisher. The gutbuster out of the air was pretty awesome, but there is only so much that can be gotten out of Benjamin with that goofy looking gold hair. It’s an idea that might have worked on paper but it isn’t quite clicking otherwise.

Here’s the opening video again.

Armageddon rundown.

Kevin Thorn v. Jeff Lewis

Thorn is just a guy in trunks this time. Lewis grabs the arm to start and gets planted with a quick backbreaker, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A torture rack backbreaker finishes Lewis in a hurry.

Here is Matt Striker to toss a coin to determine CM Punk’s opponent for tonight.

CM Punk vs. Mark Henry

Non-title and Punk’s early kick to the chest has no effect. A waistlock is quickly countered with straight power so Punk goes with the required choke on the back. Henry doesn’t seem to mind as he walks Punk out to the floor for a posting to break it up. Back in and Henry steps on the ribs but has to shrug off Punk’s rapid fire kicks. The nerve hold goes on, though the fans stay right there behind Punk. The charge in the corner misses though and Punk hits the running knee, only to have Big Daddy V come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? Henry is the better of the two options, but it isn’t like he can do that much at the moment. Punk is still in need of some challengers though and these two could do well in the role, assuming you don’t expect too much from them. Like a good match here for instance.

Post match the beating is on until Kane makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. They have things going on here, but that doesn’t mean they are the most interesting. Punk and Kane vs. the monsters feels like something that is done to fill time until Punk is ready for his next real match ad that is only going to get them so far. The rest of the show is pretty skippable, but they certainly get points for putting in some kind of effort to build stories and people up. Just execute it better.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 27, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re almost to the end of the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean around here. ECW is in need of something different and unfortunately I think we have already gotten that. Kane and Big Daddy V seem to be the next big things, though some of the Smackdown people can help. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla

Layla chokes on the rope to start and we are firmly in catfight mode. Cue Balls Mahoney for a distraction though, allowing Kelly to grab a rollup for the fast pin.

Video on Big Daddy V.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. The bell rings and Festus chases Miz and Morrison off but we settle down to Jesse working on Morrison’s arm. A running dropkick to the side of the head gets two and it’s off to Festus for a splash. Jesse is slammed onto Morrison for two more so Miz comes in, only to get front facelocked. Morrison tries to make a save but gets glared at by Festus, who clotheslines both of them out to the floor.

After Jesse’s dive onto Miz and Morrison and a break, we come back with Morrison hitting a slingshot elbow for two on Jesse. The chinlock with a knee in Jesse’s back keeps him in trouble and we hit something like a cobra clutch. Jesse finally gets up and rolls away, allowing the hot tag to Festus to clean house. The rocket launch forearm hits Jesse for two but Morrison is back in with a cheap shot for the quick pin.

Rating: C. Watchable enough match as Miz and Morrison continue to clean out what limited competition that they have. There still isn’t enough to make a full on division but even a few teams are better than champions and their challengers of the month. Outsmarting Jesse and Festus is the best way to go with them, though I’m waiting on someone to just grab the bell and ring it to cut him off.

Video on Kane.

We look back at the women’s match.

Smackdown Rebound.

Elijah Burke introduces Shelton Benjamin, who wants to be ECW World Champion.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Shannon Moore

Benjamin twists the arm and grabs a belly to belly to start, setting up a t-bone suplex. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Moore flips out of a suplex. A slingshot something is countered into the jumping Downward Spiral to give Benjamin another fast win.

Rating: C-. What else can you say here? It’s a squash for Benjamin, who seems to be the newest star who is going to be added to the show for the sake of bolstering the roster. That is what ECW needs, and even though Benjamin’s blond hair is a bad idea, it’s nice to see Benjamin getting another chance. Nothing match, but what else were you expecting?

Kane vs. Big Daddy V

Extreme Rules and Matt Striker is here with V. Kane slugs away but his running clothesline doesn’t do him much good. V sends him outside, where the stick that Striker picks up is quickly taken away. Back in and V beats him down, setting up some standing on the ribs. Kane gets in a shot of his own and starts bringing in the weapons, only to be crushed all over again. A big boot knocks the chair into V’s face though and the middle rope clothesline puts him down.

They head outside, where V hits a loud chop up against the barricade, followed by a tackle through a table in the corner to crush Kane. Another table is set up in the middle of the ring but Kane slugs away and tries a choke. Some kendo stick shots don’t work but a trashcan shot does stagger V. Cue Mark Henry to jump Kane from behind though and the double beatdown is on. Kane is chokeslammed/spinebustered through the table to give V the win.

Rating: C. Another power brawl here but the ending does open the doors for Kane to need to find a partner to fight the monsters. I don’t know who that is going to be because Undertaker is busy with anything else, but that could make for more than a few different ideas. Now just find a way around the fact that it’s a Big Daddy V match and it should be ok.

Posing ensues to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Here’s the latest pretty much nothing edition of ECW and I’m not particularly surprised. There are some stories, but you are only going to get so far with the roster that they have. ECW is comprised of a bunch of up and comers, people who haven’t been proven yet and wrestlers with nothing else to do. That doesn’t make for a very good show, but it is all they have at the moment.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 20, 2007
Location: St. Pete’s Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s Thanksgiving week and CM Punk is still ECW World Champion, having retained the title at Survivor Series over Miz and John Morrison. That means he needs a fresh challenger, and Miz getting a singles shot might be about as good as they can do. It might not be fresh, but I’ll take that over Big Daddy V. Let’s get to it.

Here is Survivor Series if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

There is a big Thanksgiving spread around ringside so things can be a bit more festive.

CM Punk vs. Kenny Dykstra

Non-title. Punk goes after the arm to start and takes him down for a running legdrop. The tiger bomb backbreaker gives Punk two but it’s too early for the GTS. Instead, Dykstra takes his head off with a clothesline and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Punk’s back. Punk jawbreaks his way to freedom but Dykstra knocks him right back down. Punk fights up again and knocks Dykstra off the top, setting up a high crossbody for two. The springboard clothesline gets the same but Dykstra manages to send him into the post to cut him off again. That’s too much for Punk, who kicks him in the leg and hits the GTS for the pin.

Rating: C. Just a quick match here as Punk picks up a win over someone who shouldn’t be giving him that much of a challenge. Bringing in more and more names is one of the best things that ECW can do, if nothing else to see who might stick. Punk is still kind of floating around without a major opponent at the moment, so sending him out there for a one off match is fine.

We recap Kane beating up Matt Striker last week.

Here is Elijah Burke in the ring for a chat and he has the newest debuting ECW star.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Tommy Dreamer

That’s a surprise, though the gold hair is still awful. Benjamin takes him down and hammers away, setting up the catapult to send Dreamer throat first into the bottom rope. Dreamer fights out of a cravate but gets knocked down into the corner. The cravate goes on again and it’s a backbreaker for two on Dreamer. Back up and a bulldog plants Benjamin, who is fine enough to pull him off the middle rope. The jumping Downward Spiral finishes for Benjamin.

Rating: D+. Benjamin getting a renewed singles push is a good thing but that gold hair is going to be the end of any value he has. There are things that just do not work and that is what seems likely with suddenly having a big yellow blob on his head. Benjamin is an athletic marvel and that should be enough without the hair being the focus.

Jesse/Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Miz and John Morrison are on commentary and Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. The bell rings and Festus snaps as Jesse takes Deuce down. Domino comes in and gets armdragged so it’s right back to Deuce for a double arm crank. Commentary seems to approve of Cherry as Jesse punches Domino out of the air. The hot tag brings in Festus as Miz and Morrison desperately look for a weakness. House is cleaned and it’s a rocket launcher clothesline to finish Deuce.

Rating: C. I could go for more of the tag division starting to pick up and if ECW and Smackdown are sharing one set of titles, it could work out well. ECW might be able to put together a team here and there and if you can put some Smackdown teams on ECW for the sake of some flavor, good for them.

Miz and Morrison aren’t worried.

Matt Striker and Big Daddy V are ready to eat Kane.

Kevin Thorn vs. Nunzio

Thorn has new gear and short, slightly spiked hair for a rather bad look. Nunzio gets taken down and pummeled in the head to start, only to get caught in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Thorn dropping down to his knees makes Nunzio bounce hard, setting up the Original Sin for the fast pin. Total squash.

Kelly Kelly and Layla got in an argument after last week’s ECW. It turned into a food fight.

Here is Layla for a chat. She is thankful for a few things, like being so much better than Kelly Kelly. Cue Kelly to pie Layla and a bigger food fight, courtesy of the Thanksgiving table, ensues.

Raw Rebound.

Kane vs. Matt Striker/Big Daddy V

The double clubbering is on to start because there are no tags. V belly to belly slams him down and there’s the mounting so Striker can talk trash. Striker drops an elbow but Kane pops up with the uppercuts. With that not working, a double clothesline staggers V and the top rope clothesline really staggers him. A big boot puts V on the floor and the chokeslam finishes Striker.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here again, as it wasn’t a long match and they didn’t do much other than have Kane beat up Big Daddy V and then pin the lame manager. That makes Kane look good and he would be fine for a future title shot against Punk, though I don’t think they go that route at the moment. At least the Big Daddy V push seems to be over, at least for the time being.

Post match V comes in to beat Kane down again to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Totally skippable show this week and nothing that you need to see. ECW isn’t terrible these days, but it is often kind of an uninteresting show where you would be better off just reading the results. Other than Kane and Punk, there isn’t anyone who feels like a star around here and you absolutely know what you’re getting with Kane almost every week. ECW feels like the third rate show and WWE isn’t doing anything to make that feeling go away. They certainly didn’t this week, as this was 45 minutes of very little.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 13, 2007
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the last show before Survivor Series and that means it is time to hammer home the build towards CM Punk defending the ECW World Title against the Miz and John Morrison in a triple threat match. Miz has come a long way in recent weeks and Morrison is the top heel around here (or close to it) so that is as logical of a title match as they have right now. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

MVP/Mr. Kennedy vs. Hardys

Yay for guest stars and the theoretical Brand Split. Matt and Kennedy start things off with the fans being WAY behind Hardy (no word on if they mean Matt or Jeff). Kennedy gets taken into the corner so Jeff can slingshot in with a dropkick for an early two. It’s off to MVP to take over on Jeff but the villains are sent to the floor so Jeff can take both of them down with a dive.

Back in and a double elbow drops Kennedy for two but he is fine enough to knock Jeff down. MVP kicks Jeff out to the floor but Matt cuts MVP (his partner) off from getting to Jeff (his partner) as we take a break. We come back with MVP pulling on both arms before Kennedy grabs a seated abdominal stretch.

Jeff fights up and gets over to Matt, allowing some of the house to be cleaned, including the Side Effect for two on Kennedy. It’s right back to Jeff to miss the Swanton though and MVP drops an elbow for two. The seated abdominal stretch goes on for a bit before Kennedy adds a legdrop for two. Jeff fights up and hits the sitout gordbuster on MVP but gets sent to the apron. Kennedy pulls Jeff down by the hair, with Jeff landing HARD on the floor. MVP throws Jeff back in for the really quick pin.

Rating: C+. The ending was rather scary but maybe MVP throwing him back inside for the easy pin was a good sign as I would hope he wouldn’t do that if Jeff was really hurt. There was an interesting dynamic here focused on Matt, as he was in the middle of two different partners. MVP/Matt has gone on for a long time now and I’m wondering how long they can keep it as good as they have so far.

Post match MVP and Matt argue but MVP cuts off Kennedy’s running chair shot. MVP and Kennedy leave, allowing Matt to help Jeff (thankfully awake) walk to the back.

We look back at CM Punk vs. Jamie Noble on Smackdown, which saw some interference that left Punk laying.

Survivor Series Classic: the first one in 1987. Classic seems to fit for that one.

Here is Matt Striker in the ring for a chat. He has some good news for us: Big Daddy V isn’t here tonight because he has a bad cold. That is a good reminder to get your flu shot because it can help everything. V will be at Survivor Series though and he will dominate everyone. Cue Kane so Striker starts backing off in a hurry. Kane doesn’t mind and beats Striker down without much effort.

Melina/Layla vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool

Melina works on Michelle’s arm to start but Kelly comes in for a pretty bad looking double suplex. Kelly pulls Melina out of the corner for the sole purpose of flipping over into a rollup for two. That isn’t working for Melina, who takes her into the corner and then pull her back out. Kelly breaks that up in a hurry and hands it off to Michelle to clean house. A big boot finishes Melina.

Rating: D+. This would be one of those “well what were you expecting” matches. Kelly and Layla ware there as eye candy, Michelle is getting better but is still a work in progress and Melina is the one slightly polished worker in the match. This was designed to have women on camera and that’s all it was going to be.

Survivor Series rundown.

SAVE US.

CM Punk vs. Jamie Noble

Non-title, Miz is on commentary and John Morrison comes out to join him before the bell. We take a break and come back joined in progress with a battle over arm control. Punk takes over with a front facelock as commentary talks about Miz’s hat. A backbreaker gives Punk two but Noble is back with a jumping knee to the arm.

The arm gets snapped back a few times and Noble cranks on it a bit to keep things on the mat. A comeback is cut off and Noble goes with something close to a keylock. That’s broken up with a Samoan drop into some Kawada kicks to give Punk a breather. Punk hits a powerslam but the springboard clothesline is pulled into a Fujiwara armbar. With that broken up, Noble tries the tiger driver but gets reversed into the GS for the pin.

Rating: C+. The focus on the commentary hurt this one a bit but other than that, they had a well put together match with a simple story of Noble going after the arm and Punk fighting through to catch him in the end. That’s an acceptable way to go with a TV main event, especially when the focal point was the people talking. Noble continues to be a valuable piece of any roster, as he is having one good performance after another.

Post match Miz and Morrison come in and beat Punk down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The important thing here is that this show felt energized. There was good enough action throughout and while that might be due to the guest stars, I wasn’t bored throughout the show. ECW’s biggest problem for a long time has been their lack of star power and that is starting to be solved, at least a bit, by having these Smackdown names come in. Keep that up and they might be on to something around here.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 12, 2007
Location: Kansas Expo Center, Topeka, Kansas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and the show is mostly set. Last week’s show was some weird offshoot that didn’t do much to make me want to see Survivor Series, but at least the pay per view looks good on paper. That could make for an interesting week here so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a special Veterans Day video.

Here is Smackdown World Champion Batista to get things going. He is getting ready for the Undertaker inside the Cell on Sunday and he is here because of an invitation from Raw General Manager William Regal. Batista wants some competition and here is Undertaker to interrupt. Undertaker seems ready to fight and we have a referee but cue Regal to interrupt, because we’re going to have a tag match.

Batista/Undertaker vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Non-title. Undertaker starts fast with Old School on Cade but Batista tags himself in for some shoulders to the ribs. Murdoch comes in and shoulders Batista down but a spinebuster gets Batista out of trouble. Undertaker chokeslams Cade and Batista spears Murdoch. The Tombstone finishes Cade in a hurry, because the Tag Team Champions should be losing in less than three minutes to a team who doesn’t like each other.

Post match, Batista gives Murdoch a bonus Batista Bomb.

Here’s a look at Smackdown vs. Raw 2008.

Beth Phoenix vs. Maria

Non-title. Beth kicks her down without much trouble to start but Maria gets in some kicks of her own. That’s enough for Beth as she grabs the fisherman’s suplex for the pin.

Post match Santino Marella comes out to check on Maria. With that out of the way, Santino starts talking about how unfair it was to get beaten up by Steve Austin last week. What happened to the first amendment? Santino wants an apology from Austin, who isn’t here this week. With that not working, he’ll go over to Austin’s friend, Jim Ross. Santino mocks JR’s English abilities and wants a fight, but JR won’t get up. Jerry Lawler will though and gets in the ring to punch Santino down.

Post break, Santino challenges Lawler for later tonight. Lawler is game.

Video on Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton.

We get a Mobile Exclusive (meaning something that aired on Smackdown) showing Randy Orton and William Regal meeting in the back. The Survivor Series match will now have Sweet Chin Music banned, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Hardys/Rey Mysterio vs. Mr. Kennedy/Finlay/MVP

Matt wants MVP to start with him but gets Finlay instead. Finlay shoulders him down and hands it off to Kennedy to work on the knee as it’s weird hearing JR talk about these guys after so many months. Matt fights up with some armdrags but a distraction lets Kennedy knock him to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Matt and Kennedy not quite getting a Side Effect right. It’s still enough to bring Rey in but MVP takes him down anyway. MVP grabs a seated abdominal stretch and it’s back to Finlay for a running sitdown splash to stay on the ribs. Kennedy hits some backbreakers and MVP grabs a waistlock as the ribs are rather banged up. Rey fights up and grabs a DDT though, allowing the hot tag off to Jeff. Everything breaks down and Rey hits a 619 to MVP and Kennedy at the same time. Jeff Swantons MVP for the pin.

Rating: C+. I think you knew what you were getting here and they did it just fine. You have more than enough talent here that any combination could have pulled off a good match here and the Mysterio rib injury worked. There is a pretty solid mid to upper midcard in WWE at the moment and this was a nice showcase for some of them.

SAVE US, which now says six days, 23 hours, 33 minutes and BREAK THE WALLS in case you didn’t get the idea yet.

Here is Vince McMahon to moderate a face to face meeting between Randy Orton and Shawn Michaels. They go over the stipulations for Sunday’s match, which brings up the idea of Shawn not being able to use the superkick. Shawn thinks Orton picked these rules because he is sick of the superkick. Maybe Shawn is a one trick pony, but maybe he could use a submission or something new.

All that matters to Shawn is that he remembers seeing his family after Orton put him down and that isn’t going to go away. Vince offers a distraction though and Orton gets in a cheap shot, only to have Vince block the Punt. Orton goes with the RKO instead and Shawn is left laying for a change. Nice use of a heel beatdown segment here.

Jillian Hall/Layla/Melina vs. Mickie James/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly

Michelle and Melina fight over wrist control to start, with Michelle wristdragging her into the corner. Kelly comes in and makes the mistake of dancing a bit too much, allowing Melina to drop her with a clothesline. Jillian comes in and quickly gives up a tag off to Mickie so house can be cleaned. Mickie gives Layla the Long Kiss Goodnight (kiss into a spinning kick to the head) for the pin.

Classic Survivor Series clip: The Rock wins the WWF Title at Survivor Series 1998 by going Corporate.

Snitsky likes to hurt people.

Jerry Lawler vs. Santino Marella

Lawler is in street clothes and JR keeps hyping up the right hand. A backdrop has Marella in early trouble and the right hands knock him up against the ropes. Marella gets in him into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs but Lawler avoids a knee drop. Some right hands stagger Lawler but Marella stops to yell at JR and gets small packaged for the fast pin. Short and inoffensive.

SAVE US. AGAIN.

Before the fans came in earlier today, William Regal held a training session for Hornswoggle in the empty arena. For some reason, Hornswoggle and Great Khali (or at least Coach in a Khali wig) both get full entrances from Lilian Garcia. Coach takes the wig off but Real yells at him until he puts it back on. Someone else as Runjin Singh handles the ranting translations and we seem to be having a full match. Hornswoggle takes a distracted Coach down, knocks the wind out of him and hits the Tadpole Splash for the fast pin. This could have been funny but it was too short to go anywhere.

Survivor Series rundown.

HHH is looking forward to Survivor Series but tonight, he’s taking out Umaga in a lumberjack match. He’ll take out all of Umaga’s guys if he needs to and then his team will win again on Sunday.

Classic Survivor Series clip: The Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us. No.

HHH vs. Umaga

Lumberjack match with the other Survivor Series team members (and more) around the ring. Umaga starts fast and the brawl is on, with HHH being sent outside. A right hand drops Matt Striker so HHH heads back inside, only to take Umaga outside this time. HHH dives off the apron to take out Umaga and the pile. Umaga gets in a shot of his own though and we take a break.

Back with Umaga hitting the swinging release Rock Bottom to take over again. Umaga sits on HHH’s ribs and lets Finlay get in a cheap shot from the floor (as you do). HHH gets in a shot to the head and tries a slam, only to fall back in a crash. We hit the nerve hold for a bit before HHH gets pounded down into the corner. The running hip attack misses though, allowing HHH to grab a DDT. The facebuster looks to set up the Pedigree but Umaga is back with the Samoan drop. Not that HHH minds as he comes back with the spinebuster, drawing in Finlay for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was almost every HHH vs. Umaga match you’ve ever seen but with some guest stars on the floor. They couldn’t have a clean ending on the last show before Survivor Series and lumberjacks are a perfect way out. I don’t think there is a ton of drama for what is going to happen on Sunday though and there was only so much interest in seeing these two fight again here.

The big brawl ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. As has been obvious on Smackdown in recent weeks, Survivor Series is not going to be a deep show. There is the Undertaker vs. Batista match on top, then Shawn vs. Orton a good bit below that. Other than that, you have Team HHH vs. Team Umaga to make it feel like Survivor Series and that’s really about it for stuff that matters. This wasn’t exactly a great go home show, but they did a nice enough job of hitting the bigger stuff on Sunday’s card. Now just get through Survivor Series and let us get on to something more traditional, as that could do Raw and Smackdown some good.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 6, 2007
Location: Rabobank Arena, Bakersfield, California
Commentators: Joey Styles, Taz

It’s time for another title match as CM Punk defends against John Morrison (again). Mark Henry seems to be primed to become the next major force around here but you never can tell just how well that is going to go. Other than that, we don’t exactly have much going on around here and that continues to be a problem. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of The Fabulous Moolah.

We open with a video on CM Punk vs. John Morrison, so at least they’re getting to the point tonight.

Opening sequence.

Mark Henry vs. Kane

Henry pounds away at the back to start and crushes Kane with a powerslam for two. Kane gets driven back first into the corner but comes out slugging. That’s cut off but Kane fights out of a bearhug attempt. The top rope clothesline connects but Henry knees him in the ribs to break up the chokeslam. Henry has had enough of this and grabs a chair, which is enough for the DQ.

Rating: C. They kept this one short and that is a good idea, as you can only get so far with these two doing their big man match. Henry continues to look like a monster and could become a monster of the next few months either around here or on Smackdown. It isn’t anything we haven’t see before, but at least they are trying something with him.

Post match Henry wrecks Kane, including the World’s Strongest Slam onto the chair.

Wrestlemania tickets are on sale. I’m still surprised that it took so long to get it to Florida.

Nunzio vs. Jamie Noble

They go with the grappling to start until Noble elbows him in the back of the head and takes him into the corner. A backbreaker gives Noble a pair of near falls and there’s a kick to the head to make it worse. The chinlock goes on for a bit, with Nunzio fighting up and hitting a quick Sicilian Slice. Noble has had it though and it’s a Rock Bottom backbreaker into a fireman’s carry gutbuster to finish Nunzio.

Rating: C+. This might not have the biggest connection to ECW but it is nice to see some fresh blood around here. Noble is the kind of person you can put in any spot and he’ll be fine through talent alone, so throwing him out there with one of the better ECW Originals is not a bad idea.

Video on John Morrison.

SAVE US, now saying “can you break the code” and “the answer is code”.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla

Miz (without Brooke, who was released a few days ago) is on commentary. Layla kicks her down to start and we’re already to the mounted right hands. A slam finishes Kelly in less than a minute. Yeah a slam.

Post match Balls Mahoney runs in to check on Kelly but Miz would rather walk off than fight.

Video on CM Punk vs. John Morrison, including their history.

We get a clip from Rey Mysterio’s ECW debut to promote his new DVD.

Elijah Burke vs. Shannon Moore

Moore sends him into the corner to start and drops Burke for an early two. That’s too far for Burke, who punches him into the ropes for the running crotch attack. The Outer Limits elbow (good name) sets up the Elijah Express for the fast pin.

Fabulous Moolah tribute video.

Miz wishes John Morrison luck against CM Punk tonight, but Morrison doesn’t need it. All Miz can do is manage a bunch of girls and he can’t even do that well. Miz tells Morrison that his luck is running out soon.

We look at D-Generation X beating Randy Orton and Umaga last night on Raw.

Post Raw main event, William Regal makes a rule for Orton vs. Shawn Michaels at Survivor Series: if Shawn uses the superkick, he is disqualified and can never challenge Orton for the title again. In exchange, if Orton tries to get disqualified, Shawn is champion.

Survivor Series rundown.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Punk is defending and gets shouldered down early on. Back up and Punk starts with the kicks but Morrison blocks a middle rope sunset flip. The springboard kick to the face gives Morrison two and we’re already in a crossarm choke. Punk fights out of that as well and the springboard clothesline connects for two. A leg lariat sets up a powerslam and some Kawada kicks to keep Morrison in trouble. Cue Miz for a distraction though to break up the GTS though and Morrison grabs a rollup for two. With Punk down, Miz throws in his hat to distract Morrison, allowing Punk to grab the retaining rollup.

Rating: C+. I like the idea of bringing Miz up to the next level, as he has done well with what he has been given so far but still needs that extra boost to get him to the main event scene. If nothing else, putting him in there with Morrison in a bigger feud could be a good way to go as they have shown some nice chemistry when they are together.

Overall Rating: C+. The best thing here is they seemed to start to have an idea of how to use the Smackdown guys. I would rather have the lower level Smackdown stars filling out this show than the ECW Originals, most of whom had nothing going on and looked like losers most of the time. This show felt like it was getting closer to some stability and a more established norm and that has been needed for a long time around here.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 5, 2007
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,133
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Survivor Series and now that the Smackdown main event has been announced, you have to expect the Raw counterpart will be set up soon. The big story tonight is a one night reunion of D-Generation X, as HHH needs some help deal with Randy Orton and Umaga. Sounds Survivor Seriesish to me. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Fabulous Moolah.

Opening sequence.

Here is D-Generation X to get things going. After a fairly long entrance, HHH says this is for one night only and asks if we’re ready. The catchphrase is loaded up but a crotch chopping Hornswoggle interrupts. HHH: “Well that’s…different.” HHH tells him to get back under the ring but Hornswoggle doesn’t listen. Shawn is asked for a run sheet and, after going through all of his merchandise, finds said sheet in his boot (Shawn: “In case I forget what I’m supposed to do.”).

The sheet says DX PROMO in segment one at 9PM (HHH: “East coast time.”) and Hornswoggle isn’t on until the short segment. Hornswoggle then armdrags Shawn into an armscissors (with HHH pointing out that it is the SHORT armscissors). Shawn: “I’m going to make a judgment call here: for tonight, he’s in.”. Hornswoggle doesn’t want to go under the ring because there’s a monster under there.

Shawn goes to look….and is pulled under. He comes back up with worms in his mouth so here is the Boogeyman. HHH hands him a mic, with Boogeyman saying “I’M THE BOOGEYMAN, AND I’M COMING TO…..see if I can join DX.” Shawn makes another executive decision and lets Boogeyman in again so here is Great Khali as a bonus. Shawn: “To keep me from turning into a human Slim Jim, let’s pretend he isn’t here and move on.” HHH goes into an Indian impression that would get him thrown off the air today but now it’s Coach interrupting.

HHH isn’t having this and tells Runjin Singh what Coach said about Khali earlier. Shawn, who CAN’T LIE, backs HHH up and Khali chases Coach to the floor. Everyone else leaves, with Shawn saying he doesn’t know who writes this anymore but this is the worst thing he’s seen since that Katie Vick thing. HHH: “I don’t think anyone writes this crap. They’re on strike.” Catchphrases are hit to wrap up the wackiness.

Actor Luke Perry is here. There are some kids around him, and if one of those is his son, we have seen the wrestling debut of the future Jungle Boy.

We look back at Kelly Kelly winning last week’s Halloween battle royal and getting destroyed by Beth Phoenix after.

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Non-title and Phoenix grabs a release fisherman’s suplex for the pin in less than a minute. Well so much for Kelly for the time being, which is how it should go in this situation.

Santino Marella knows that Steve Austin will be here tonight and mocks Austin’s acting abilities. He even throws in a paper bag, so Austin can act his way out of it.

Carlito vs. Joey Munoz

Hold on though as Carlito says he isn’t wrestling so here is a replacement.

Snitsky vs. Joey Munoz

Pumphandle slam finishes Munoz in about thirty seconds.

Post match Snitsky kicks Carlito in the face and gives him the pumphandle slam too. Time for another Snitsky push it seems.

We get a Jeff Hardy video set to Rooftops by Lostprophets. This is actually on Peacock despite it being a music video and the Lostprophets singer being a monster. That aside, this is a heck of a video, with the lyrics about screaming and dropping bombs being timed to shots of fans screaming for Hardy and Swantons. You can tell something big is coming for him and that is a very good idea. Ignore Jerry Lawler being heard asking “how long is it” after the video starts.

For Survivor Series: Team HHH (HHH/CM Punk/Kane/Jeff Hardy/Matt Hardy) vs. Team Umaga (Umaga/MVP/Mr. Kennedy/Finlay/Big Daddy V).

Mr. Kennedy/Finlay vs. Rey Mysterio/Jeff Hardy

JR dubs Hardy and Mysterio as the WWE Air Force. Hardy and Finlay go to the mat to start until a Kennedy distraction lets Finlay hit a clothesline to the floor. We take a break and come back with Mysterio hitting a springboard crossbody on Kennedy, only to have him run Mysterio over.

It’s Finlay coming back in to go after the knee, including a half crab. The legdrop onto the knee makes it worse and Kennedy adds a right hand for two. Mysterio is back with something like a DDT, allowing the hot tag off to Hardy to clean house. The Whisper in the Wind hits Kennedy but Finlay makes the save. Rey 619s Finlay to the floor, leaving Hardy to hit the Swanton for the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty standard midcard tag match here with the wrestlers involved being good enough to make almost anything work. Mysterio vs. Finlay is set up for a blowoff on Friday while Hardy vs. Kennedy seems to have run its course. That being said, throw in the video package before the match and it is hard to imagine they are waiting much longer on giving Hardy the main event push, which seems to have been set up for a few weeks now.

Maria tries to tell Santino Marella that Steve Austin is here but he doesn’t buy it.

Here are Maria and Santino Marella for a chat. Santino mocks the Condemned, then he mocks the Condemned’s director, then he mocks the Condemned again, then Steve Austin comes out. Austin corrects Santino’s errors in his catchphrases and then asks about the Condemned again. Santino really did hate the movie and turns down a beer, saying he would rather have a glass of red wine. Austin hands him a copy of the Condemned but Santino can’t watch it again.

There’s the Stunner, allowing Austin to put the DVD in Santino’s mouth. Austin thinks Santino is thirsty and goes to the back before coming out driving a beer truck. Santino gets sprayed down and, despite her begging, so does Maria. Beer is consumed to wrap up a segment that wasn’t funny and felt pretty out of character for Austin. I know he needs to promote a DVD, but that just doesn’t feel like an Austin thing.

SAVE US!

Vince McMahon is in the back with Hornswoggle and takes the blame for the trouble Hornswoggle has had with Jonathan Coachman. McMahon even has a way for Hornswoggle to prove himself at Survivor Series…..when he faces Great Khali.

Survivor Series rundown.

HHH is in the back and has been asked to talk because they need to fill in time while Steve Austin’s mess is cleaned up. Shawn Michaels comes in to say he has it set, so here are the DX Dancers….which is Big Dick Johnson. HHH isn’t impressed but Shawn says he’s a father of two so the only cool thing he knows is Dora the Explorer. Don’t worry though as HHH has The Girls Next Door (from a Playboy reality show, meaning Shawn leaves with his eyes covered). Dancing ensues and it’s very strange to see HHH…..I guess it’s dancing but I’m not sure.

Lance Cade sends Mickie James away for talking to Trevor Murdoch.

Trevor Murdoch vs. Cody Rhodes

Ignore Lilian Garcia saying Lance Cade (at ringside) is in the match by mistake. Hardcore Holly is here too and Rhodes is sent to the apron to start, where he gets in a shoulder to the ribs. Murdoch breaks that up and takes him down for a chinlock as Lawler and JR make as many redneck jokes as they can. Rhodes fights up and hits a bulldog into a knee drop for two but Cade’s distraction fails. Murdoch misses a charge into the corner though and Rhodes grabs a sunset flip for the pin. Not much to this one but Rhodes wins again.

Tribute video to Fabulous Moolah. This includes a rundown of her career highlights, such as becoming the first woman to wrestle in Madison Square Garden. I guess she wrestled herself that night.

Jim Duggan/Super Crazy vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Before the match, Duggan and Crazy chant SI/HO over and over. Haas knocks Crazy over to start and hits a slam before handing it off to Benjamin. More slamming abounds as Duggan continues to play cheerleader on the apron. Benjamin knocks Duggan off the apron but Crazy grabs a rollup (with trunks) for the pin. Duggan never tagged in but he does pat Crazy on the head after the win.

Umaga/Randy Orton vs. D-Generation X

It’s a brawl on the floor to start with Orton being sent into the announcers’ table before being thrown inside. Umaga comes in to miss a sitdown splash on Michaels, allowing HHH to grab a surprisingly effective DDT. HHH gets knocked outside though and we take a break. Back with Umaga missing a charge in the corner, allowing the tag off to Orton. That’s fine with HHH, who drops Orton almost immediately.

Michaels comes back in for the usual comeback, including the forearm and top rope elbow. Umaga isn’t having that and runs Shawn over, allowing Orton to bring Umaga in for real. Some right hands keep Shawn down in the corner and it’s back to Orton for a dropkick. The circle stomp sets up the running Umaga splash and we’re off to the nerve hold.

The middle rope headbutt misses and an enziguri to the shoulder (not sure that’s how that works) allows the hot tag back to HHH. Everything breaks down and Umaga saves Orton from the Pedigree with the Spike, setting up the running hip attack in the corner. The RKO is countered with a shove into Umaga though and Shawn comes in for a quick superkick to pin Orton.

Rating: C+. Much like the other tag match, they played the formula here and it still works, as everyone involved can do this style rather well. Shawn vs. Orton II should be a good showdown at Survivor Series, while Umaga vs. HHH at least has the team format to keep things a little more fresh. The DX reunion was good for a night, but I don’t need to see it again going forward.

Overall Rating: D+. I’m not sure what this show was but it didn’t exactly work. Maybe it is due to Survivor Series coming up so soon, but this felt like a weird side trip rather than a show designed to help set up the pay per view. There were so many short matches that didn’t add much and it was a weird night all around. The DX reunion was fun but the Austin cameo fell pretty flat, leaving this as a not very appealing two hours. Much more strange than good this week and that isn’t a positive thing.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 29, 2007
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Cyber Sunday and on the way to Survivor Series, which means things can get a bit more back to normal around here. The big Raw story was that Randy Orton retained the WWE Title over Shawn Michaels after getting himself disqualified, which means we are probably heading for a rematch. Let’s get to it.

Here is Cyber Sunday if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Divas Battle Royal

Victoria, Kelly Kelly, Maria, Mickie James, Torrie Wilson, Kelly Kelly, Brooke, Melina, Jillian Hall, Michelle McCool

Most of the entrances are edited off of Peacock (music I’m assuming) and they’re all in Halloween costumes here. Layla (cop) is eliminated first as Victoria rolls wild in her sumo (read as fat) suit. The bottom rope Banzai drop crushes Brooke (jungle girl) to get rid of her and Michelle tosses Jillian (Brittney Spears), only to have Melina eliminate Michelle (Eve).

Melina (showgirl) and Mickie (Native American warrior princess) go to the apron with Melina eliminating both of them at once. Torrie Wilson uses her football helmet to run Victoria over as JR tries to find out if Victoria is in her suit alone. Kelly (gangsta) dumps out both Torrie (Philadelphia Eagle) and Victoria for the win.

Rating: D. What were you really expecting here? There was no reason for the match to take place other than to have the women out there in their outfits, which we had seen the night before at the pay per view. Kelly winning is a bit of a surprise, but she is the kind of woman that WWE would love to push to the moon if she can do anything in the ring at the moment.

Post match Beth Phoenix comes in to lay Kelly out.

We look at Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels from last night.

Here is Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn is thankful to everyone who voted for him last night but he didn’t win the WWE Title. He has heard a lot of people talking about their grapefruits, but HBShizzle is going to be honest with you: you have to have pinpoint accuracy to hit his. What maters is that he won the match though, and now he his getting a rematch. He wants it tonight, but here is Vince McMahon to interrupt.

McMahon knows that people want to see him be the champion again and Vince seems to like the idea too. He knows what Shawn really wants is revenge though because, despite that Bible reading, Shawn is a rotten man. Shawn admits that he spent four years wanting revenge, which he swore he would never do when he went home in 2002.

Now he wants to hurt Randy Orton and take him out, so does he have his rematch or not? Vince says Survivor Series is an appropriate name, and says the match is on without saying what he means. Then Shawn teases a superkick to Vince, who falls down in fear. Kind of an odd segment but more to come I’m sure.

You can vote for the Diva Search winners!

Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Holly and Shelton start things off with Benjamin taking him down for some shots to the head. It’s off to Haas, who gets chopped rather loudly before the villains take over again without much trouble. Holly gets in another shot though and the hot tag brings in Cody, who comes in off the top with a clothesline. Cody blocks Haas’ DDT and hits one of his own for the fast pin. Holly still doesn’t seem convinced.

Candice Michelle has broken her collar bone in a horrific injury. It is so bad that we look at it again just so you don’t forget about the whole thing.

Beth Phoenix cuts off Todd Grisham and says she has no regrets over what she did to Candice Michelle last week. Then this week, the Divas were out there in their costumes because no one takes this stuff seriously. Candice can go back in Wisconsin, knowing that she was destroyed by the Glamazon.

Trevor Murdoch is reading the 500th issue of WWE Magazine when Mickie James comes up. She thanks him for not letting Lance Cade clothesline her last week, but Murdoch doesn’t like seeing an innocent girl get hurt. Mickie: “I’m not that innocent.” Cade comes up and, after Mickie leaves, gets on Murdoch for not having his head in the game.

William Regal is in Vince McMahon’s office and recaps Vince’s issues with HHH and Shawn Michaels. Vince says his issues with HHH is personal, which brings him to Hornswoggle. Regal brings Hornswoggle in and leaves Vince to talk about how he hasn’t been around Hornswoggle enough. Tonight, Hornswoggle has to face Coach and Vince wants the family honor upheld. Hornswoggle needs to learn how to deal with victory, because it is his family’s birthright. If he is a McMahon, he needs to start to hate and he needs to start tonight. Hornswoggle starts grunting and shouts as he runs off.

SAVE US!

Hornswoggle vs. Jonathan Coachman

Hold on though as we need a guest referee, which brings out Mick Foley. Coach charges but Foley gets in his way, allowing Hornswoggle to run around a bit. Hornswoggle goes to the leg but Coach grabs him by the beard. That’s broken up as well and Hornswoggle knocks him down, only to miss the bottom rope elbow. Coach hits Foley out of frustration and grabs a chair, only to have Foley knock him down. Hornswoggle has his own Mr. Socko and grabs Coach between the leg, allowing Foley to add a clothesline. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t good but at the end of the day, what are you expecting here? They played up the comedy and had Foley here to even things up a bit. You don’t need to do anything beyond the obvious here and it was perfectly fine, even if the match was barely there aside from the comedy stuff.

HHH, in a rather hideous shirt, is almost depressed by Todd Grisham’s pep talk before the handicap match against Umaga and Randy Orton tonight. The odds are against him but he has an ace up his sleeve, so if he goes down, they’re coming with him. They’re two of the worst in the game, but he is the Game.

Lance Cade vs. Paul London

Trevor Murdoch and Brian Kendrick are here too. London hits a quick crossbody for two but gets caught in a belly to back suplex. Cade sends him to the apron, with London coming back in with a springboard crossbody. A Murdoch distraction lets Cade hit his sitout spinebuster for the fast pin.

Post match the Highlanders come in and beat down London and Kendrick before glaring at Cade and Murdoch.

Jeff Hardy/DH Smith vs. Carlito/Mr. Kennedy

Smith is being thrown into the deep pretty quickly. Hardy and Kennedy get things going with Kennedy grabbing a headlock. That earns him a heck of a clothesline but Kennedy pulls Hardy into the corner so Carlito can come in. Some shoulders to the ribs don’t do much for Carlito as Hardy kicks him down and grabs his leg trap cradle for two. Smith comes in and gets chopped in the corner, only to come back with a clothesline to send Carlito outside. Kennedy joins him thanks to Hardy and the good guys pose as we take a break.

Back with Smith fighting out of an Indian Deathlock but getting pulled back into the corner so Kennedy can stay on the leg. Kennedy draws in Hardy to get in a few more leg shots because he knows how to villain. Smith manages an enziguri though and the hot tag brings Hardy in to start cleaning house. The Whisper in the Wind gets two on Carlito with Kennedy having to make the save. Smith drops Kennedy though and it’s the Twist of Fate into the Swanton to finish Carlito.

Rating: C. Pretty basic tag formula here but they have thrown Smith straight into the middle of the midcard and he hasn’t looked bad so far. Granted I don’t know how far you’re going to go with the name DH Smith but playing into the British Bulldog relation and then giving him some wins is a good way to start. Now do something with it, as you can always use some fresh blood.

Here is Santino Marella for a chat. He wants to make a formal complaint to the WWE travel department, who screwed up and prevented him from showing up and giving Steve Austin a piece of his mind. At least his in-flight movie wasn’t the Condemned! Cue Steve Austin…..’s music, as Marella pops up on screen doing an Austin impression and offering to beat up Marella with a can of the a** whip.

Cue Maria to say that Austin (originally described as “he”, prompting Santino to tell her to not use pronouns) is going to be here next week (which receives NO reaction in an odd moment). Marella accuses her of being on internet chat sites again, because the only place you’ll see Austin is on the cover of the Condemned in the discount bin at the gas station.

Here are the Diva Search finalists. Eve wins and is rather happy. Wouldn’t it have made more sense to have this on a show about how the viewers had control?

SAVE US, now with “19_LAUNCH” and “BREAK THE CODE” visible.

Randy Orton/Umaga vs. HHH

Non-title. HHH and Umaga start things off but an Orton distraction means HHH has to split his time. A jumping clothesline drops Umaga but he’s right back with some right hands in the corner. Umaga hits the Samoan drop on HHH and the double teaming is on….so here is Shawn Michaels for the DQ and the save.

HHH and Shawn clean house, likely setting up a tag match next week.

We cut to Vince McMahon and William Regal in the back, with Vince saying DX is back next week for one night only.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a lame way to come off a pretty good pay per view, though Survivor Series in just a few weeks should be an upgrade. There wasn’t much to see on the show, as they didn’t have anything noteworthy in the ring and McMahon going after HHH feels a bit tired. Next week looks stacked though so maybe this is just a bad one off week. At least I hope it is.

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