ECW On Sci Fi – July 18, 2006 (2020 Redo): Just Stop It Already

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: July 18, 2006
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

It’s time for another guest star, mainly because Kurt Angle is on hiatus and Rob Van Dam is suspended, leaving no one to challenge Big Show. This time around it’s the Undertaker, who seems like someone who could thrive in the hardcore stuff. Then again you never can really tell with this stuff so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Kelly’s Expose and it’s the same as always, with Mike Knox interrupting. They head to the ring, with Knox saying what is about to happen is due to her.

Mike Knox vs. Sandman

Fallout from Sandman attacking Knox last week. Sandman busts himself open with the beer can so Knox jumps him from behind to start and takes things outside for the brawl. A whip into the barricade sets up some elbow drops to keep Sandman down and they head back inside. Sandman hits a bulldog to send Knox outside and it’s time for the cane. Naturally he hits Kelly by mistake, allowing Knox to hit a low blow for the fast pin.

Knox leaves the unconscious Kelly at ringside. The replay shows that Knox pulled Kelly in the way of the cane shot.

Shannon Moore is coming.

During the break, Kelly was stretchered out.

Here’s Paul Heyman, flanked by the riot guards, for a chat. Heyman says his children all have to drink the Kool Aid from the same glass. Last week he explained suspending Rob Van Dam to protect himself but now he hears confusion. Cue Tommy Dreamer to interrupt, with Heyman looking a bit confused.

Dreamer says he has been with Heyman since the beginning and now he wants an explanation of what Heyman is doing. Everyone is confused so what is going on? Heyman kisses Dreamer on the mouth and here’s Test to run Dreamer over with the big boot. The TKO leaves Dreamer laying, as Joey thinks Test might be working for Heyman. Maybe. It’s possible.

Balls Mahoney says with his name, you have to be extreme. He may be a bit nuts, but he likes things that way.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Non-extreme rules (because that worked so well last time) rematch from Saturday Night’s Main Event (because that worked so well last time). The fans want tables but get a headlock from Sabu, who is driven into the corner for the break. Stevie stomps him down and puts on an armbar but that’s broken up in a hurry. A running leg lariat drops Richards for two and a tornado DDT plants him again. The camel clutch makes Richards tap.

Rating: D. I know you have to have these people on the show to make it feel like ECW (or at least in name only) but these guys feel so tacked on. The previous segment felt important, but Sandman felt like a pest for Knox to beat up and this felt like WWE saying “There. Happy now?”. They aren’t even hiding it that much anymore and the sooner they cut the cord, the better.

CM Punk talks about his background in various martial arts, which make him so much more of a dangerous wrestler. It’s almost weird to see him with the longer hair.

The vampire introduces the tarot card reader as Ariel, who shows us the death card and her bloody neck.

Video on Big Show’s path of destruction.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and this feels so wrong. Show drives him into the corner and unloads with elbows so Undertaker evens things up with kicks to the ribs. The slugout gets the fans into things a bit so Show headbutts him down to cut them off. They trade big boots for a double knockdown and Show sends him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Undertaker hitting a Stunner over the top rope but getting kneed down for two. Undertaker’s own headbutt just hurts him again and Show takes it to the floor for a second time.

Undertaker is sent head first into the steps but he’s back with elbows to the face. Another headbutt takes Undertaker down back inside but this time he pulls Show into a kneebar. That’s broken up as well and Show pounds him down, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Old School is broken up though and it’s a superplex to give Show two….as Undertaker sits up. Undertaker’s chokeslam is broken up and there’s another headbutt. The cobra clutch is countered as well and now Old School can connect. Cue Great Khali to go after Undertaker, with Big Show joining in for the double countout.

Rating: C-. It was your run of the mill Undertaker vs. Big Show match and that’s your first big problem. These two work out well enough against each other but at the same time, it’s something that has been done so many times that it doesn’t exactly draw much interest. Undertaker down in ECW feels like one of the times he would challenge for the Intercontinental Title, as it almost feels like he got lost on the way to his real match.

Post match Undertaker isn’t having any of this and starts wildly swinging a chair, only to get beaten down again. A double chokeslam through the announcers’ table ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show really felt like they didn’t have any idea what they were doing and just threw a bunch of stuff together to fill in their allotted time. ECW really doesn’t serve much of a purpose and it isn’t getting much better, meaning I’m not sure where this show is going to go. Wherever it is, it needs to be an upgrade from here though, because things are getting rough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW On Sci Fi – July 11, 2006: Flair Goes Extreme

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: July 11, 2006
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re officially into a new era around here as Rob Van Dam has lost the ECW World Title to Big Show thanks to a screwy finish/the need to get the title off of him due to his arrest. Big Show already has his first challenger lined up too, as Ric Flair is this week’s guest star. This could go in a lot of ways so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Big Show winning the title last week when Paul Heyman turned on Rob Van Dam.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Heyman for an opening chat. Last week he made sure Van Dam lost the title and it’s all the fans’ fault. The people here are the reason he is no longer the champion and the reason why Van Dam has been suspended for thirty days. Heyman tried to convince Van Dam to calm down a bit and not defend the title so much, but the RVD chants drove him even further.

That drove Heyman to end it all and now he is a martyr. He sacrificed his friendship with Van Dam for these people and he will be your messiah. Heyman will lead his children to the promised land and you’re all coming with him. This felt rather forced, probably because that’s exactly what it was.

Post break, Tommy Dreamer runs into Heyman, now with armed riot guards. Heyman has no time to explain, because Dreamer’s match is next, despite the fact that he is in street clothes.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Test

Dreamer slugs away to start and it’s a Cactus Clothesline to take them to the floor. Back in and Test hits a running clothesline in the corner as the cockiness starts early. Dreamer gets the knee up in the corner though and grabs a neckbreaker. The DDT is countered into a full nelson slam but Test misses the top rope elbow. Dreamer manages to get him up in the Death Valley Driver but Test slips down and grabs a rollup (plus the rope) for the pin.

Rating: D+. I got what they were going for here but having Test win via rollup wasn’t exactly making Dreamer look like he was in serious trouble. Granted it’s Test so he isn’t the best choice to go with something even slightly complicated, but how hard is it to have Dreamer get in a little offense and then get squashed? Fine idea and poor execution, which could apply to a lot of things around here.

Candice Michelle gets dressed when Kelly comes in. Candice promises to take the dancing to the extreme and gets very close to Kelly’s face.

Ariel the Tarot Card Reader says the future holds blood and spits blood at the camera.

Kelly and Candice Michelle have their expose and of course here’s Mike Knox with the towel. This time Sandman pops up to cane Knox off the stage.

CM Punk says his tattoos tell a story, like DRUG FREE and HONOR. He’s fighting against the system.

Sabu vs. Justin Credible

This is under normal rules for reasons of general stupidity. Sabu takes him down to start so Justin heads outside to grab a table. That earns him a big running flip dive so Sabu sets up the (partially broken) table at ringside. Credible comes outside and is promptly put on the table for the Arabian Facebuster and the DQ. Well that was pointless.

Balls Mahoney says he’s always ready to fight.

Ric Flair says he’s coming for his 17th World Title tonight but he also needs to talk about Mick Foley. If Foley wants to be a man, he can face Flair in a match of Foley’s choice. As for Show, Flair is coming for the title and will take advantage of any mistake Show makes.

Shannon Moore, now with spiked hair, tattoos and piercings, is coming.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Ric Flair

Show is defending and this is under Extreme Rules. They circle each other a bit until Show sends him into the corner with the straight power. Flair bails to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Flair being gorilla pressed and headbutted as the dominance is on early. Flair is already busted open and another headbutt makes it even worse. Show tosses him outside so it’s time to bring in the weapons but Show sends Flair back inside before they can be used.

A suplex drops Flair, who tells Show to bring it on anyway. That means another headbutt into a powerslam but Flair scores with some low blows. Some low kicks have Show down again and now it’s time for the weapons. Flair doesn’t waste time in going with the barbed wire baseball bat to gouge Show’s head open. Some trashcan and chair shots put Show down….for two, as he launches Flair off on the kickout. Now it’s thumbtacks time and some chair shots to the head knock Show into said tacks. That just angers Show, who hits a chokeslam and the cobra clutch backbreaker retains.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to make of this one as people remember it as Flair being this big pin cushion, but that’s really just a quick burst. The match runs about thirteen and a half minutes and the violence doesn’t come into play until about eight or nine minutes in. Yeah Flair bleeds like a pig at the start but he does that when he goes to the grocery store. The barbed wire bat and tacks are a bit much, but they’re really not that big of a part of the match.

That being said, the match isn’t all that good as it’s Show squashing him, Flair getting in a few weapons shots, and then Show finishing him off. Bad match, but not as bad as people remember, especially when it ties into Flair wanting to go extreme with Foley, and perhaps finding out that he’s in over his head.

Post match Show throws him into the tacks. Flair is helped out and we get a THANK YOU FLAIR chant to end the show. This part, with Flair barely able to walk and being rather bloody is probably the reason this match is somewhat infamous, as he looks pretty bad.

Overall Rating: D+. This series is reaching the point of dead on arrival, as any spark that it had is long gone, with “Ric Flair Goes EXTREME” not being much of a calling card. The first problem is the main event stuff, which would be the upper midcard on Raw at its very best. That doesn’t exactly make me want to stick around, but it’s certainly better than EVERYTHING else, which feels as worthless as you can get. Test beating Tommy Dreamer, a vampire, and Sabu in a regular match. If that’s as good as they have here, they have more troubles than they can solve.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW On Sci Fi – July 4, 2006: You’ll Get To Know Him

IMG Credit: WWE

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: July 4, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Taz

Things are not looking up for ECW at the moment as Rob Van Dam lost the WWE Championship the previous night on Raw. That’s one heck of a loss for ECW but they still have their own championship around Van Dam’s waist. What more could go wrong on back to back nights? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Paul Heyman welcomes us to the show and talks about Van Dam losing last night. That’s because Van Dam has been putting himself through a rough schedule as a double champion (indeed, for all three weeks of his reign). Big Show storms in and demands a title shot tonight. Oh here we go.

Opening sequence.

We open with Kelly’s Expose: Salute To America, meaning she strips off American flag gear this time. As usual, Mike Knox cuts it off just in time.

Mike Knox vs. Guido

Before the match, Knox says he’s sorry but only he gets to look at Kelly. Guido jumps him from behind but gets hit in the face for his efforts. A backbreaker gets two as the fans give us a YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chant. Some knees to the neck give Knox two and he hits four straight slams. Knox misses a running knee, only to come back with a big boot. The spinning Downward Spiral finishes Guido without much effort.

Rating: D. And yeah you can really see ECW slipping away. Bless those ECW fans for trying, but this isn’t the same as the old deal and I don’t think they have accepted that yet. This is going to be the world of the interchangeable big men who fit the WWE style destroying the ECW Originals and we just got a good illustration of that style.

We look at Van Dam losing the title last night.

Van Dam comes in to see Heyman and demands to defend against Big Show tonight. He isn’t letting the big guys run them over and he’s fighting tonight. If he loses then so be it, but he’s not backing down.

Video on Test.

A bald man jumps the barricade and grabs the mic to complain about all of the filth that he is seeing around here. This program should not be on TV and you should all be ashamed of yourselves. If you enjoy ECW, you are a sinner who will burn in h***. Security tells him to go back over the barricade. Sandman, cane, same as always.

Van Dam comes into Big Show’s locker room and slaps him in the face to accept the challenge.

Post break, Van Dam yells at Heyman for asking where his head is. Van Dam is here because they are ECW and stick to their guns. He has to beat Big Show to be a real champion, which Heyman says is right. The title match is on and it’s Extreme Rules.

Test vs. Al Snow

Test is jacked and comes out to silence. The fans do pop for Snow, but are quickly quieted down as Test runs him over in the corner. A TKO ends Snow in a hurry.

Post match Test kicks Head into the crowd.

Video on Sabu (who talks, which should not be the case like, ever).

The Vampire is outside and spits blood at the camera.

And now, we meet a guy with a bunch of tattoos who is addicted to competition. His name is CM Punk.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and it’s Extreme Rules, meaning we do get a weapons check before the bell (granted that might have been to fill time during the break). Rob slugs away to little avail as Show runs him over with a shoulder. A headbutt puts Van Dam on the floor and the fans let Show know he can’t wrestle. Show clotheslines him over the barricade and they walk in front of the fans in the front row. There is no random swearing or violence so you can tell that this isn’t a real ECW crowd. Rob manages to jump onto the barricade for a kick to the head and we take a break.

Back with Rob hitting a springboard kick to the face but Show catches him on top with a superplex. Show kicks him in the head to keep him down and then stands on Van Dam’s chest in the corner. The fans chant for marijuana as Show drops some elbows for two. A bearhug doesn’t last long so Show switches to a backbreaker and bends Van Dam’s back over his knee. Van Dam knees his way to freedom and kicks the knee out, followed by a basement crossbody.

Rolling Thunder gets two and there’s a running spinwheel kick in the corner. Show catches him in the air though and tosses Van Dam outside. The steps are picked up but Van Dam gets in a drop toehold to send Show face first into them. Van Dam goes up top but Show pulls the dive out of the air in an impressive catch. Rob’s chair is swatted away and there’s a chokeslam for two.

Show knocks the referee away and grabs a powerbomb, only to have Van Dam chair him in the head. There’s the Van Daminator into the Five Star but there’s no referee. Cue Heyman to count two….and stop before three because we’ve got a screwjob. Show hits a nasty chair to the head and a chokeslam onto the chair gives Show the pin and the title with Heyman counting the pin.

Rating: C-. Ignoring all of the shenanigans and the necessity of the title change, the match was only ok at best, with Show doing his power stuff and Van Dam bouncing off of him over and over. Then you got to the ending, which was telegraphed but again, they didn’t have much of a choice. Van Dam had to drop the title to someone and other than Kurt Angle, who he beat last week, who else was there but Big Show? Sure it was about as close to the Survivor Series 2002 story with Van Dam in Brock Lesnar’s place, but they didn’t have much of an option otherwise.

Overall Rating: D. We’re four weeks into this and you can see the writing on the wall for ECW. This show was dominated by big men who would have never been a focal point in the original ECW and the wrestling was bad on top of that. I don’t think anyone was realistically thinking that ECW was going to be like the old days again but they didn’t waste time in making the ECW guys look like Barry and the Horowitzes. Not a good show, but you kind of had to expect something like this to happen sooner or later. It’s just the third WWE brand now, and it’s probably better to cut off the false hope before it gets sad.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW On Sci Fi – June 27, 2006: Are They Really Still Guest Stars?

IMG Credit: WWE

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 27, 2006
Location: Roanoke Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re back for round three and with Vengeance and the following Raw out of the way, Rob Van Dam has completely dispatched Edge and John Cena, meaning he will never have to deal with them again. I’m sure that won’t be a problem whatsoever, so tonight Van Dam gets to face Kurt Angle instead. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Sabu vs. Roadkill

No intro here as we go straight to the ring. Sabu knocks him down to start but it’s way too early for the camel clutch. It’s already time for the Triple Jump Moonsault but Roadkill knocks the chair out of his hand. The Barn Burner and an avalanche give Roadkill two each but he takes too much time getting out a table. Sabu hits the big dive off the chair to the floor but the Dirt Road Slam gives Roadkill two back inside.

The Vader Bomb gets the same but Roadkill takes too much time setting up the table (you may be noticing a pattern emerging). Sabu throws the chair at him for a low blow and hits a super hurricanrana. The Atomic Arabian Facebuster through the table sets up the camel clutch with the chair wrapped around Roadkill for the tap.

Rating: D+. They were moving as fast as they could here and that’s what they should have done. Sabu has been one of the major focal points of ECW so far and that’s a good idea. He has a reputation and the fans care about him so it makes a lot of sense to have him slay a monster like this. Even if the monster is an Amish farmer for some reason.

The Vampire is still outside.

Tommy Dreamer calls out Big Show for another beating. Cue Big Show, so Dreamer slugs away to start, only to get slammed four straight times. The cobra clutch backbreaker leaves Dreamer laying again. Short and sweet for the second week in a row.

Kelly shows her boyfriend various things, then pulls up her bra and goes to the ring with him.

Kurt Angle talks about being a failure since April 2 because he hasn’t been a champion since then. His wife and daughter love him but he hates himself. Now he needs to make Rob Van Dam hurt so badly that he goes back in time and chooses a new job.

Mike Knox vs. Danny Doring

Kelly is here at ringside so Joey makes fun of Tazz for not being able to say exhibitionist. Knox runs Doring over but hang on as Kelly goes over to offer a special shot to some fan. That’s broken up so Kelly heads to the back, leaving Knox to shrug off Doring’s offense and hit what would become known as Sister Abigail for the fast pin. Knox won, but Kelly is what matters here and that is very obvious.

Test is coming. I know this because there is a graphic which says “TEST IS COMING”.

Post break Kelly has her Expose and just like last week, Knox breaks it up at the last second.

And now, a rather large man in a Ric Flair style robe comes out to strip. Sandman gets in his weekly cameo….and the guy strips even more, revealing the gyrating g-string. The beating ensues, as usual.

Paul Heyman hypes up Rob Van Dam for the upcoming triple threat title match at Saturday Night’s Main Event against Edge and John Cena. The catch though is Kurt Angle is in if he wins tonight and it’s a four way. Van Dam says it’s cool because he’s been smoking lately.

Edge and Lita take some seats in the front row. Post break, Tazz asks Edge what he’s doing here so Edge takes the mic and says he’s here to watch Angle vs. Van Dam. Then he’ll see who he’s fighting because he’s the whole f’ing show.

Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam

Non-title. Angle drives him up against the rope to start and then takes it to the mat with no effort. A front facelock sends Van Dam straight to the ropes and this time he’s out with a monkey flip. Angle is fine with being on the mat again and starts working on the arm. Back up and Van Dam manages a kick to the face but gets shoved off the top and into the barricade for the crash.

We take a break and come back with Van Dam caught in a chinlock, which is another item on the list of reasons this feels like WWE instead of ECW. Rob jawbreaks his way to freedom but Angle snaps off the belly to belly to take over again. The bodyscissors goes on with Angle driving forearms into Van Dam’s head. Van Dam gets up so Angle German suplexes him back and it’s a reverse chinlock to keep Rob down. Back up again and Rob hits a spinwheel kick for his first breather in a few moments.

The comeback is on with a springboard kick to the face and some clotheslines, only to have Angle suplex him again. The Angle Slam and ankle lock are countered so Angle grabs the German suplex for two more. A kick to the face gives Rob two but Angle snatches the ankle to put him in serious trouble. Van Dam sends him to the floor for the break and hits a kick to the head back inside. The split legged moonsault gets two on Angle but he runs the corner for the belly to belly superplex. The straps go down but Rob reverses the Angle Slam into a DDT for two. Now the Five Star can retain the title.

Rating: B. Take Rob Van Dam and Kurt Angle, give them about eighteen minutes and let them have a good match. That’s one of those ideas that doesn’t need a lot of planning and it didn’t seem to here. Van Dam winning clean continues to make him look like the top star around here and doesn’t make it feel like a stretch in the process. That’s a tricky line to follow and they made it work well here.

Post match Edge applauds….and then runs in to spear Van Dam down. A display of affection with Lita ensues to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event is what matters here but when you add in Mike Knox, the Dreamer/Big Show deal, and the opener, there wasn’t much to see elsewhere. It’s also the third show in a row featuring a Raw guest star and given who else is on this show, that’s the best thing that the show could do. You’re only getting so far with Roadkill, Justin Credible and Balls Mahoney and I think that is becoming very clear in a hurry.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW On Sci Fi – June 20, 2006: The Right Direction

IMG Credit: WWE

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 20, 2006
Location: Pepsi Arena, Albany, New York
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Well after last week’s mess, they don’t have the highest bar to clear. It would be nice to have something that actually feels like ECW, which is why we have Edge and Randy Orton here tonight. It’s the go home show for Vengeance so expect a lot of talk about the matches there. We might even get some ECW stuff in here if we have time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with an unnamed witch (Medium? Fortune teller?) turning Tarot cards as we hear about ECW invading Raw, causing Raw to come back here tonight.

Opening sequence.

Sabu vs. Tony Mamaluke

Trinity (now named) is here with Mamaluke as Tazz starts trying to get “Vixens” over for the ECW women. Sabu takes him down by the leg to start but Mamaluke is back with a knee to the head. A kick to the head gets two and Mamaluke starts in on the arm. That earns him a kick to the face and a slingshot legdrop to give Sabu two. With Mamaluke on the floor, Sabu uses a chair for a springboard dive to take him down again. Sabu whips out the table but gets chaired down. Mamaluke’s dive off the top is knocked out of the air by a chair being thrown into his face, setting up the camel clutch to give Sabu the win.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it already felt more like ECW than anything we saw last week. It was a polished, cleaned up WWE version of ECW, but it did feel more like ECW. Sabu gets a win to help warm him up for John Cena on Sunday, but other than that it was a bunch of dives and weapons shots until the finish.

Kelly promises to strip more than she did last week.

Rob Van Dam is ready to team with Kurt Angle against Edge and Randy Orton in a preview for Sunday. He needs to get rolling, but does come back for one more finger point.

Here’s an annoyed looking Big Show for a chat but Tommy Dreamer cuts him off. Dreamer says if Show wants to make a name for himself around here, he’ll have to go through Dreamer to do so. Dreamer slaps him in the face and the destruction is on in a hurry. The cobra clutch backbreaker into the regular cobra clutch leaves Dreamer laying as Show walks away. Dreamer smiles a lot because he’s kind of loopy. It’s good to see that nothing has changed.

The vampire is outside again.

And now, Macho Libre. Before his match, Libre gives us a luchador style Randy Savage ECW and says he’s looking for a fight. SNAP INTO IT! I think you know where this is going.

Sandman vs. Macho Libre

Macho offers to tell him something (something, something, something, something OH YEAH) and gets caned down for about twenty seconds for the pin. This was funnier than the Zombie, but not by much.

John Cena arrives in the back and is surrounded by ECW. As Paul Heyman holds Sabu back, Cena says he knows all of the extreme things they have planned for him on Sunday. He knows they don’t like him, but Heyman can bring everyone he has on Sunday. Let’s make it an Extreme Lumberjack match because all he wants on Sunday is a chance to go down swinging. Cena glares at Rob Van Dam, turns around, and leaves.

Kelly comes out for her Expose. After a lot of dancing, she manages to get her bra off this time but here’s a guy with a towel to cover her up and take her away. A lot of booing ensues.

Test is coming. A lot of booing should ensue, as he’s one of the least ECW guys you could bring back.

Edge/Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle/Rob Van Dam

Lita is here with the Raw guys. Before the match, Edge makes it very clear: he thinks ECW and it’s fans SUCK. Angle goes straight for Edge’s leg to start and then throws him down with ease. It’s quickly off to Orton vs. Van Dam with Rob kicking his way out of trouble. Orton gets crotched on the top and a top rope kick knocks him to the floor. There’s the moonsault to take him down again but it’s quickly off to Edge, meaning Lita can low bridge Van Dam to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Angle breaking up Orton’s cover so Edge sends Van Dam outside in a heap. A whip sends Van Dam hard into the steps and Orton hits the good looking dropkick for two. Van Dam rolls over and makes the hot tag to Angle though and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. Edge is sent outside so Angle locks Orton’s ankle but Edge makes the save. Orton uses the distraction to chop block Angle down and it’s time to start working the knee.

Angle pulls Edge down into the choke so Lita rakes the eyes to break it up. A raised boot in the corner lets Angle snap off another German suplex and it’s Van Dam coming in to clean house. Everything breaks down and there’s an Angle Slam to Lita for daring to try a running belt shot. The RKO takes Angle down but Van Dam kicks Orton in the face again. Van Dam cuts off the spear with a belt shot to the face though and the Five Star is good for the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty good main event tag match here and that’s what the show needed. What mattered here was making ECW look like they could hang with the best of Raw and it didn’t go too far off the deep end to do so. Van Dam and Angle are full fledged WWE main eventers so giving them this win isn’t a big jump up for them, but it makes ECW look better.

Overall Rating: D+. While I would still hesitate to call this show good, this was miles ahead of the disaster that we got last week. The main event was good, the Sandman thing could be turned into a funny weekly deal, and Sabu got some momentum heading into his big match against Cena. The big problems are still really obvious though: this is a WWE show in an ECW costume and there is almost nothing to the ECW roster outside of Van Dam and two WWE guys on loan. It’s not good, but it made last week feel like some opening night jitters and that’s a big sigh of relief.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW On Sci Fi – June 13, 2006 (Series Debut, 2020 Redo): The One With The Zombie

IMG Credit: WWE

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 13, 2006
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Attendance: 5,100
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s a big night as ECW makes its official return after a five year absence, but this time around they’re officially under the WWE banner. They had a heck of a show at One Night Stand, but other than Big Show, Rob Van Dam and Kurt Angle, I’m not sure what to expect on a regular basis. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of One Night Stand, headlined by Rob Van Dam winning the WWE Championship from John Cena under some less than logical circumstances and thanks to Edge’s help. Cena and Edge are here tonight.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Paul Heyman with something in his arms to introduce Rob Van Dam. Rob is rather pleased to have won and holds up the title, which now has no name plate at all (that’s better than the Cena one from Raw). As for Cena, Van Dam hopes he’s here to help them all celebrate. Heyman hopes so too, because he has a gift for Van Dam: the ECW World Title, which he always hoped he would hold (they why….never mind). Van Dam calls it a great honor for his career but wants to keep the WWE Title too. Rob: “It spins.”

Cue Edge and Lita, with Edge thanking Heyman for letting him be here and saying he respects Van Dam. They both won Money in the Bank and now they’ll tear the house down at Vengeance. Then he spears Van Dam in half and leaves through the crowd with Lita. As luck would have it, John Cena is there too and he knocks Edge back to ringside.

Cena and Van Dam take turns beating on Edge but get in an argument of their own, allowing Edge to leave. That earns Heyman a right hand and Cena goes after Edge, with the ECW locker room showing up quite a bit late. This felt like a Raw opening with an ECW sticker slapped on and that doesn’t bode well. It felt like WWE instead of ECW and little good can come of that for this show.

Post break Heyman gives the locker room the big pep talk and promises that they’re coming to Raw on Monday.

The Zombie vs. Sandman

And here’s your infamous moment of the show, as we have a zombie because the show is on the Sci Fi network. Commentary buries the idea as Zombie gurgles into a microphone. Sandman comes through the crowd (no cigarettes of course but he does drink the beer). A bunch of cane shots and a White Russian legsweep finishes Zombie in less than a minute. Barely a match, but it shows you that this show is in trouble.

We meet Kelly, who is an exhibitionist. That means she is going to take off all of her clothes tonight. So now we’re channeling Vince Russo on ECW?

We see the entire Jerry Lawler vs. Tazz segment from One Night Stand (minus Tazz’s entrance), which to be fair isn’t all that long.

Kurt Angle vs. Justin Credible

Angle takes him to the mat in a hurry and hits him in the face before pulling back on the neck. There’s a German suplex and Credible is sent outside. Back in and Angle grounds him again for some slaps to the back of the head. A rear naked choke finishes Credible in a hurry. Total destruction.

Post match Angle accepts Randy Orton’s challenge for Vengeance.

Heyman says he’s throwing out the rest of the show and making a ten man EXTREME battle royal. All weapons are legal and the winner gets to face John Cena at Vengeance.

Kelly promises to show us all of her assets next.

We see the marquee outside of the arena and we have a vampire.

We look back at the opening segment.

Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Sabu, Balls Mahoney, Little Guido, Al Snow, Danny Doring, Roadkill, Stevie Richards, Tony Mamaluke, Big Show, Big Guido

Weapons are provided, the winner gets John Cena at Vengeance and the FBI debuts a rather scantily clad manager who doesn’t get a name yet. Show clears the ring to star but doesn’t actually eliminate anyone, which is kind of impressive in a battle royal. We take a break and come back with no eliminations and the weapons being brought in. Tazz: “This is what makes us better than them.” Sabu sets up a table at ringside as a bunch of people get in some weapon shots on Show.

The big Head shot doesn’t work as Show tosses Snow out before doing the same to Doring. There go Richards, Roadkill and Mahoney but Dreamer slows Show down with cookie sheet shots. Show catches Air Sabu and sends him to the apron before tossing Dreamer out and through the table. Big Show chokeslams Little Guido onto Mamaluke and dumps both of them. We’re down to Big Guido, Show and Sabu with Show dumping Guido in a hurry. Guido holds the arm though and a running chair shot knocks Show out to give Sabu the win.

Rating: D. I can’t say I’m surprised as this was the WWE definition of an extreme/weapons match all the way. You had your usual trashcans, chairs, cookie sheets and a table and nothing more, because this was all about Big Show with Sabu coming in to steal the win. It also doesn’t help that outside of Sabu, the ECW originals were treated like small obstacles who were there for Big Show to hurt.

Overall Rating: F. No, in every sense of the word. I wasn’t an ECW fan (too young, didn’t get to see it, not the right demographic, not my style) and I wasn’t wild on it being brought back in the first place, but this had almost nothing to do with ECW. This show felt like they put together a supplemental show for Raw, remembered they needed to have ECW involved, and then added in a zombie and a vampire to have something sci fi included.

This was a terrible show and had nothing to do with ECW other than three letters. The Raw segment and the Raw wrestlers were treated as the stars around here while ECW were a bunch of people who happened to be on the secondary Raw show. Absolutely awful here and if this is what they’re doing, just change the name to WWE Super Duper Show or something close to it because that’s what we’re getting.

You can’t recreate the original ECW. It was the right product for the right time in front of the right audience. That was ten years ago though and now, especially with these resources available, you can’t have the same feeling, or really anything close to it. Having people like Big Show and Van Dam and Angle gives it star power, but two of those three people are WWE stars who feel like they are being loaned out to ECW. I completely get why they used the ECW name, but other than those three letters, this is not going to be ECW, nor is it going to be close. Now I get why that might be appealing to some, but this was awful.




Maria/Kelly b. Beth/Eve

When the celebrity is probably better in the ring than Kelly, she’s got a problem.