Ring of Honor TV – July 26, 2017: Happy Humphrey Would Be Proud

Ring of Honor
Date: July 19, 2017
Location: Lowell Memorial Auditorium, Lowell, Massachusetts
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Rico De La Vega

It’s back to the title picture tonight as Kushida is defending the TV Title against Jay White in what could be a good match, assuming Punishment Martinez doesn’t interfere. There’s also a six way match because where in the world would we be without throwing a bunch of people into a match with no particular rhyme or reason? Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

De La Vega is from Future of Honor and Women of Honor and sounds like an Armando Alejandro Estrada knockoff.

The Young Bucks and Adam Page are in the ring to start. They want the Six Man Tag Team Titles you can consider the title match booked. That’s enough from them though as they bring out Marty Scurll for the opener.

Marty Scurll vs. Frankie Kazarian vs. Josh Woods vs. Vinny Marseglia vs. Will Ferrara vs. El Terrible

One fall to a finish with tagging required, though lucha rules apply. We do the fast paced tagging with no action to start until it’s Ferrara vs. Kazarian to really get us going. Kazarian grabs a hiptoss to start but Woods tags himself in to face Ferrara. Will’s thrust to the neck has no effect so he tags in Marseglia instead.

Terrible comes in to chop it out with Vinny and the rather gutty Terrible gets sent into the corner where he no sells a forearm to the jaw. Scurll breaks up a cover off a DDT and it’s Kazarian vs. Terrible. A hard clothesline drops Kazarian and we take a break. Back with Marseglia and Ferrara in the ring as everything breaks down around them. Woods sends Ferrara outside and hits a slow motion running knee to the jaw.

Cue Shane Taylor to beat Woods up, leaving us to hit the parade of secondary finishers, capped off by Marseglia’s Swanton on Ferrara. Scrull tries the chickenwing but gets chased off, leaving Kazarian to hit a Backstabber and Unprettier on Terrible. Scurll runs in to throw Kazarian out though and pins Terrible at 11:07.

Rating: C. I really don’t care for this kind of match as there’s too much going on and nothing really gets advanced. Scurll breaking up pins and then stealing the fall was a good way to push him, though I could have gone for this meaning something (maybe a title shot or a spot in a #1 contenders match). It was a way to fill eleven minutes but nothing with much value.

Christopher Daniels agrees to face Cody for the ROH World Title in two weeks but wants it to be 2/3 falls.

Beer City Bruiser vs. Brian Milonas

Milonas is a rather large tub of goo from the Top Prospect Tournament where he didn’t do much for me. They do the big collision of the stomachs to start and Milonas actually hits a fall away slam. Silas Young offers a distraction though and Bruiser sends him outside for the Cannonball from the apron. Back in and Bruiser hits a running shot to the face, followed by a boot the same general area for two. Milonas catches him on the top with a superplex but misses the middle rope legdrop. Bruiser kicks him in the face again and hits the frog splash for the pin at 4:59.

Rating: D-. See, they’re both big and overweight so it’s interesting. Ring of Honor is a company that is supposed to be the next generation of wrestling or whatever but this was straight out of Vince McMahon’s playbook in the 1980s, if not far before in the days of people like the McGuire Twins or Happy Humphrey. Milonas is embarrassingly huge and made Bruiser look good by comparison.

Post match Young says it’s going to be a long time before Jay Lethal is back.

TV Title: Kushida vs. Jay White

Kushida is defending and this has potential as I like both guys. Feeling out process to start with White taking him down by the arm. De La Vega is getting even more irritating as he starts telling Ian to shut up in Spanish, just like almost every other evil Hispanic wrestling character ever. Back up and Kushida hiptosses him down for the basement dropkick to take over. White trips the champ up though and we take a break.

Back with White slamming him out of the corner for two and we hit the chinlock. A Muta Lock with White pulling on the arm for extra leverage sends Kushida bailing to the ropes. Kushida sends him outside for a dive though and it’s time to get fired up. White grabs the rolling single underhook suplexes to cut him off, including a third into the corner. Another suplex is countered into the Hoverboard Lock with a bodyscissors, only to have White power out.

A Flatliner and dead lift German suplex give White two but Kushida is right back with another Hoverboard Lock. White gets to the ropes and we take a second break. Back with White elbowing the heck out of White’s head and grabbing a cobra clutch on the mat. That doesn’t do much for White so he tries the Kiwi Crusher but Kushida reverses into a small package for two.

A kick to the head drops White again and we get a breather. White is up first and hits the Kiwi Crusher but the bad arm means a bad cover so Kushida can kick out. Back up and White slugs away to put both guys down again. Kushida catches him on top and grabs the Hoverboard Lock up there. That’s not enough as he superplexes White down and hits Back to the Future to retain at 14:40.

Rating: B. That’s what I was expecting with the arm work playing into the match and the finish. Kushida is pretty easily my favorite New Japan guy and he works some of their best matches every single night. White was no slouch here either as he wrestled his usual good match, which has a simple style but does everything it needs to do.

Post match they shake hands as #1 contender Kenny King (Then why did White get the shot here?) comes out to stare Kushida down and end the show.

Next week: Women of Honor! Uh…great.

Overall Rating: C+. Good show this week and we have something special to look forward to in two weeks. The main event is solid and makes Kushida, as well as the title, look more important, though hopefully we get the talented King instead of the one who feels like the Gold Standard Shelton Benjamin. I liked the show more than usual and, save for the bad yet short middle match, it’s worth checking out.

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Ring of Honor TV – July 5, 2017: Back on Track

Ring of Honor
Date: July 5, 2017
Location: Frontier Fieldhouse, Chicago Ridge, Illinois
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana

We’re still in Chicago and still getting ready to deal with the fallout from Best in the World, which should start in another two weeks if we’re lucky. I’m really running out of ways to complain about how messed up the schedule is and I still don’t understand why we have to wait so long. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s new World Champion Cody in the ring so apparently we’re already on the new taping cycle. THEN WHY DIDN’T WE HAVE THIS LAST WEEK??? Anyway before he can say much of anything, Christopher Daniels shows up and beats the heck out of the new champ. A referee gets tossed and the brawl continues with Cody hitting a Disaster Kick. Daniels gets in a moonsault to the floor though and security breaks it up. The fans want to see them fight and didn’t seem to favor one over the other. Good opener here and I have no idea why this didn’t follow the pay per view last week if it was already filmed.

Jay Briscoe says this is different than the Top Prospect Tournament and Josh Woods is in way over his head.

Jay Briscoe vs. Josh Woods

They adhere to the Code of Honor in a bit of a surprise. Feeling out process to start with Josh tripping him to the mat and chuckling a bit. A cross armbreaker doesn’t last long so it’s another trip to take Briscoe down. Josh knees him in the head and this is one sided in the first few minutes.

Jay comes right back with a big boot to knock Josh outside and there’s a suicide dive. Well done there with having Josh get the better of it when there are rules and structure but Briscoe takes over when things get a little more violent and intense. Back with Jay throwing him outside for a whip into the barricade as the brawling continues to go Briscoe’s way.

There’s a ton of room on the floor too, which makes me think they could have easily fit another row or even two of fans in there. I can’t imagine sales were that weak in Chicago of all places. Back in and Josh blocks a suplex for one of his own, followed by the TKO into a knee to the face. A springboard spinning knee/kick to the face gets two on Jay, who shrugs it off and lariats Woods for the pin at 10:50.

Rating: B-. I had a good time with this match as Briscoe continues to give the younger guys a rub, just like he did with Jay White. It’s not like he has anything else going on right now so give these guys something that they’re not going to be able to get from anyone else. Good match too with Woods showing off because he found out he was in over his head.

We look at Will Ferrara splitting with Cheeseburger because he’s sick of dealing with a charity case like Cheeseburger. Haven’t these guys split like three times now?

Tempura Boyz vs. Coast to Coast

Actually hang on as here are the Young Bucks who offer to add themselves to the match with the titles on the line under tornado rules.

Tag Team Titles: Young Bucks vs. Tempura Boyz vs. Coast to Coast

The Bucks are defending under tornado rules and the champs waste no time cleaning house. It’s immediately time to fire off the kicks to send all four challengers outside, followed by the Rise of the Terminators. The double dives are broken up though with the Boyz hitting stereo German suplexes on the floor.

Coast to Coast dives on everyone and we take a break. Back with Nick firing off running knees in the corner to both Boyz, only to get caught in something like a 3D with a Flatliner instead of a cutter. There’s the big flip dive to the floor to take out Coast to Coast but the Meltzer Diver is broken up.

Coast to Coast comes back in and breaks up the Superkick Party (Colt: “Everybody knows they’re just going to do superkicks so it’s not that hard to figure out.). A double Indytaker sets up double superkicks to retain the titles at 8:27. That’s the EXACT same ending as the match in Long Beach.

Rating: C+. I can’t believe I’m saying this but thank goodness for the Bucks here. Coast to Coast and the Tempura Boyz are completely worthless tag teams so throw the Bucks in there and turn it into a glorified squashed. The match wasn’t great but this could have been very boring so the Bucks really did help things out.

Highlights of Adam Cole vs. Marty Scurll in an anything goes match.

Mark Briscoe vs. Beer City Bruiser vs. Kenny King vs. Chris Sabin

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a TV Title shot. Mark says he has to win because he has four kids. I wonder if he has an above ground pool. Mark and Kenny start things off and apparently this is under lucha rules, meaning Bruiser can come in and toss people to the floor.

Sabin dives into a side slam and for some reason Bruiser tags out. Why would you do that in a one fall match where you have to be legal to win? King’s Muta Lock is broken up and it’s Mark coming in to clean house. A moonsault to the floor takes out Bruiser and King, followed by Sabin firing off the kicks from the apron.

We take a break and come back with Bruiser running Mark over as the tags have been completely abandoned, as is the custom in these matches. Mark gets crushed against Sabin in the corner for a good looking crash, followed by a running flip dive to the floor to take out Mark and Chris. Kenny dives onto everyone but Mark is smart enough to walk away. Back in and Mark hits the brainbuster on Kenny, setting up the Froggy Bow at the same time the Bruiser splashes Chris. Both guys get up to avoid leaving is as a three way but King actually manages a Royal Flush on the Bruiser for the pin and the title shot at 10:59.

Rating: C. Pretty standard chaos match here with everyone flying all over the place and little in the way of storytelling, though that’s kind of the point to something like this. King winning is an interesting way to go as the Rebellion was such a waste of time but King’s natural athleticism should be more than enough to give him a good match with Kushida.

Overall Rating: C+. I had a good time with this show as there were three solid matches and a strong angle to open things up. They should be fine head into the next few weeks but above all else I’m VERY happy that we’re already on the pay per view fallout and don’t have to sit around waiting through weeks of one off filler shows. Good show this week and one of the more entertaining editions in a long time.

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Impact Wrestling – November 25, 2015: Thank Goodness

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 25, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s the final night of group play as we’re finally going to know the final sixteen people who could become the new World Champion. That means the matches almost all have meaning for a change, which should mix things up a good bit. There’s no word on what happens after this but the finals should be coming soon. Let’s get to it.

We open with the standard recap and preview.

Group X-Division: DJZ vs. Manik vs. Tigre Uno

This is a playoff after these three tied in points. It’s a two fall match with the winner of the first fall getting to leave and then the second winner advancing as well. They all go after each other to start with Tigre sending both guys to the floor and hitting a huge moonsault off the top to take them both out. Back in and Manik and Uno trade arm holds until DJZ comes back in to break it up, only to be sent to the floor. Manik puts Tigre in a Gory Special and adds a reverse Boston crab to DJZ at the same time. Back up and DJZ grabs a quick double DDT to advance to the round of sixteen.

Tigre starts fast with a reverse suplex into a Stunner for two (cool move) but gets caught in a cross armbreaker. That sends Tigre to the ropes so Manik tries a belly to back superplex, only to get elbowed down. A split legged corkscrew moonsault sends Tigre to the next round at 7:57.

Rating: C. This is becoming my standard rating for an X-Division match. It didn’t have much time to go anywhere, the high spots were fun and the title meant nothing. I’m really not sure what they see in DJZ going forward after the changes to Manik but why bother with potential when you can go with comedy?

Drew Galloway was in Glasgow and talks about being married to this business because it’s all you have time for as a wrestler. This is the longest time he’s been home in ten years and he can’t wait to come back here with his perfect partner: the World Heavyweight Championship.

Group UK: Rockstar Spud vs. Drew Galloway

Feeling out process to start until Drew unleashes the power with a gorilla press. They head outside with Drew sending him back first into the apron, only to miss a charge and go head first into the steps. Drew barely beats the count back in and misses a charge into the post to make things even worse. Some running dropkicks and an enziguri mean it’s time for Spud to take off the bowtie. The Underdog is broken up but Drew can’t bring himself to take a cheap shot, allowing Spud to grab a jumping DDT for two. Not that it matters as the Claymore (running boot, to the chest in this case) puts Spud away at 7:17.

Rating: B-. Better than I was expecting here as Spud has found that perfect formula to make you believe that he could pull off a huge upset like this without it being ridiculous. Galloway is going to make a deep run in this thing and it’s cool to see him have to sweat a bit against someone who is fun to watch in Spud. Good match here and better than I was hoping for.

Group UK

Drew Galloway – 9 points (0 matches remaining)

Bram – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Rockstar Spud – 3 points (0 matches remaining)

Grado – 0 points (1 match remaining)

Group UK: Grado vs. Bram

If Bram wins, he advances to the round of sixteen. If Grado wins, there’s a three way playoff with Spud, Bram and Grado later tonight. Grado dances a lot and gets rolled up in four seconds. They had to get seven matches in tonight so this almost had to happen at some point.

Group UK

Drew Galloway – 9 points (0 matches remaining)

Bram – 6 points (0 matches remaining)

Rockstar Spud – 3 points (0 matches remaining)

Grado – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

Group Future Four: Micah vs. Jesse Godderz

Winner advances. Micah gets sent to the floor to start as Pope talks about getting the job done no matter what he was doing. Well he certainly did a lot of jobs so he’s got something there. Back in and Jesse slowly pounds away until Micah makes his comeback to indifference. A Samoan drop puts Jesse down but he avoids a top rope headbutt, setting up the Adonis Crab to advance Jesse at 4:29.

Rating: D. Is there a reason Micah has a job? He’s generic in the ring, no one cares about him, and I don’t remember a single thing about him. Jesse is starting to turn a very weak corner and it’s always good to have a heel that you want to see get punched in the face. At least they kept this quick as this group has been death since it started.

Group Future Four

Eli Drake – 7 points (0 matches remaining)

Jesse Godderz – 6 points (0 matches remaining)

Micah – 4 points (0 matches remaining)

Crimson – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

Recap of Group Tag Team.

Kurt Angle has been in the UK to hype up the Maximum Impact tour. He officially announced his retirement tour and says his run is over, possibly after this tour.

Group Tag Team Specialists: Robbie E. vs. Davey Richards

Winner advances. They trade armdrags to start and it’s an early standoff. Robbie’s armbar doesn’t work and Davey sends him to the floor, only to have Robbie switch places for a flip dives off the apron. Back in and Davey takes over with a clothesline and inverted Indian deathlock. Robbie fights up with some clotheslines to set up the Boom Drop for a close two, more or less sealing his fate. They trade rollups until Davey stomps onto Robbie’s chest for two more. Creeping Death advances Davey at 7:15.

Rating: C+. Gah I can’t stand Davey Richards. He’s fun when he’s out there with Edwards but when he gets into that martial arts and LET ME SHOW YOU NINTEEN DIFFERENT WAYS I CAN KICK YOU stuff, he’s one of the most annoying guys I’ve ever seen. Robbie would have been a fun story but we’ll go with dull and overrated instead.

Group Tag Team Specialists

Matt Hardy – 9 points (0 matches remaining)

Davey Richards – 4 point (0 matches remaining)

Robbie E. – 3 points (0 matches remaining)

Eddie Edwards – 1 point (0 matches remaining)

Group Wild Card: Crazzy Steve vs. Kenny King

If Steve wins we have another playoff but if King wins, he advances. They start fast and trade armdrags to continue a popular trend tonight. Josh recaps the Menagerie until King elbows Steve in the face to take over. Steve goes up top and honks his horn before a springboard hurricanrana gets two. What appeared to be a Codebreaker is countered into the Royal Flush to advance King, who I don’t think is with the promotion anymore, at 4:29.

Rating: F. This is your weekly WHY AM I WATCHING THIS match as Steve is an unfunny comedy guy who is still around for reasons I’ll never understand. The only good thing here is the lack of having to watch Aiden O’Shea and Steve again in a playoff. This was the worst division by about a mile and one of the few I actually dreaded.

Group Wild Card

Mahabali Shera – 9 points (0 matches remaining)

Kenny King – 6 points (0 matches remaining)

Aiden O’Shea – 3 points (0 matches remaining)

Crazzy Steve – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

Aries says Lashley will have to be at his best to win.

Pope gives out more awards:

Move of the Tournament – Sky High to Kenny King

Upset of the Tournament – Brooke b. Gail Kim

Turkey of the Tournament – Grado vs. Rockstar Spud

Group Champions: Lashley vs. Austin Aries

Winner advances. Aries bounces off Lashley to start until a missile dropkick staggers Lashley a bit. That’s fine with Lashley as he throws Aries away and starts driving shoulders in the corner. Aries knees his way out of a delayed vertical suplex by knocking Lashley down to a knee but Lashley stands back up and suplexes him anyway. That is SCARY power.

Back from a break with Aries elbowing out of Lashley’s grip but getting caught in a belly to belly. The spear hits the post though and Aries follows up with a missile dropkick. Lashley slaps him out of the corner though and dead lifts him into a powerslam. I repeat my scary power line. The Last Chancery doesn’t get Aries anywhere so he goes with discus forearms. Lashley again powers out of the brainbuster and throws Aries over his head with a release German.

Aries avoids the spear but Lashley sidesteps the suicide dive. The match comes to a screeching halt as Aries is holding his arm with ninety seconds to go. Lashley finally clotheslines him down again as this thing JUST WON’T END. Aries grabs the Lash Chancery but Lashley makes the rope. Instead of standing around for the last thirty seconds, Aries tries a 450 but eats a spear to send Lashley on at 15:05.

Rating: B. At least it went out on a good match, even though Aries got stupid at the end after being smart most of the time. Lashley is the smart choice here since he actually works for TNA, but Aries was a nice surprise. I mean, I’m stupid for realizing he’s a surprise according to Josh but he’s a lot smarter than me after all.

Group Champions

Ethan Carter III – 7 points (0 matches remaining)

Lashley – 6 points (0 matches remaining)

Austin Aries – 4 points (0 matches remaining)

Mr. Anderson – 0 points (0 matches remaining)

We recap the night because just announcing the brackets isn’t interesting enough.

Here are the official round of sixteen brackets:

Ethan Carter III

DJZ

Bram

Davey Richards

Lashley

Drew Galloway

Mahabali Shera

Eli Drake

Tigre Uno

Gail Kim

Eric Young

Kenny King

Jesse Godderz

Awesome Kong

Bobby Roode

Matt Hardy

That could be worse, but they’ve handed Carter a spot in the semifinals.

Ethan Carter III is thrilled with his draw.

DJZ is ready…..for the three women he’s brought home.

Davey Richards is of course respectful about Bram.

Eli Drake is a smarmy jerk and says he won’t be dancing with Shera. I like him more and more every time I hear him talk.

Eric Young IS GOD.

Jesse Godderz isn’t worried about any man, woman or Kong.

Bobby Roode says his toughest test is coming.

Matt Hardy thinks no one is stopping him.

Overall Rating: C-. THANK GOODNESS! I am so incredibly sick of this tournament and listening to Josh talk about how IT’S SUDDEN DEATH IN THIS GROUP and having Pope call everyone daddy every ten seconds. I understand that there has been a lot of action in this and some of it has been really good. However, so much of it has been stuff like Jesse vs. Micah or King vs. Steve.

The good is indeed good but this concept going on for two straight months with NOTHING else would drive anyone crazy. If you want to have a tournament then fine, but don’t drag it out this long. The good is completely overshadowed by the bad and uninteresting, leaving you with two months of watchable wrestling that is completely wasted because it’s the same idea over and over and over. At least it’s over now and we can get on to……the actual tournament.

Results

Tigre Uno and DJZ b. Manik – Split legged corkscrew moonsault

Drew Galloway b. Rockstar Spud – Claymore

Bram b. Grado – Rollup

Jesse Godderz b. Micah – Adonis crab

Davey Richards b. Robbie E. – Creeping Death

Kenny King b. Crazzy Steve – Royal Flush

Lashley b. Austin Aries – Spear

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Impact Wrestling – November 4, 2015: Groundhog Day

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 4, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s Week 5 of the World Title Series and things are starting to come together. You can see a lot of the people who are going to move forward and most of the people who aren’t making it into the field of sixteen. In addition to this, we’re also getting a special interview with Jeff Hardy. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick recap of last week and a preview of tonight’s major matches.

The announcers preview the matches as well.

Preview of the Hardy interview where he talks about breaking his leg.

Group Knockouts: Madison Rayne vs. Brooke

Before the match, Madison talks about how the Knockouts started the revolution nearly ten years ago. Madison goes on to give every must win cliché that you’ve ever heard of because there’s nothing personal in almost any of these matches. It’s a feeling out process to start until Brooke takes over with a dropkick and shoulders. A clothesline out of the corner gets two but Brooke might have hurt her hand. Brooke’s top rope elbow gets two but the Rayne Drop gives Madison the pin at 3:23.

Rating: D+. Decent enough match but which of them am I supposed to want to see win? There’s no reason to boo or cheer either of them because there’s no personal issue here. We have a tied series now so it’s basically a mini elimination tournament, which is probably going to happen in multiple groups, just like everything else does.

Group Knockouts

Brooke – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Gail Kim – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Awesome Kong – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Madison Rayne – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Eric Young says he’s the real original and Roode might not make it to the main event.

Video on Roode vs. Young to set up their match later tonight.

The announcers preview Roode vs. Young.

Group UK: Bram vs. Rockstar Spud

They stand there and look at each other for a bit to start. The fans are entirely behind Spud of course. Some forearms and right hands have Bram in the corner, followed by a couple running forearms. Bram grabs him by the throat but Spud bites him on the hand. Spud knocks him back to the floor but gets caught diving off the apron. Bram starts fish hooking Spud’s mouth before stomping on the ribs back inside. That’s quite the downgrade in offense. A quick enziguri staggers Bram and a rollup gets two. Not that it matters as the Brighter Side of Suffering puts Spud away at 5:38.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but I was hoping Spud would win so we could wrap the division up instead of letting the drama continue. It would be really nice to have some names advance to the round of sixteen so it might feel like we’re getting closer to actually wrapping this thing up. A little light at the end of the tunnel would be nice for a change.

Group UK

Drew Galloway – 6 points (1 match remaining)

Rockstar Spud – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Bram – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Grado – 0 points (1 match remaining)

Roode is ready for Young and is going to end the year as a double champion.

Another preview for the interview, this time talking about Matt winning the title. Good grief can they do anything but fill in time on these shows?

Group X-Division: Mandrews vs. Manik

This would be the weekly “these guys have no chance of winning but here’s a match between them anyway.” Manik takes him to the mat to start but Mandrews gets back up and springs from an armdrag into a twisting cradle for two. An armbar doesn’t get Mandrews anywhere so Manik takes him down and works on the leg.

Back up and Mandrews dropkicks the leg as Josh calls this a classic. A quick hurricanrana takes Manik down and a tornado DDT does the same. Mandrews takes his time looking at the crowd and his standing moonsault hits knees. He takes FOREVER going up top though and his shooting star hits knees, allowing Manik to hit his GTS into a kick for the pin at 7:09.

Rating: C-. Classic? This? All I saw was two guys doing basic high flying moves to each other for a few minutes. As have been the case with most of the matches in the Series, this was little more than ok. They didn’t do anything all that interesting and I have little reason to believe that either guy is going to mean anything going forward.

Group X-Division

Manik – 6 points (1 match remaining)

Tigre Uno – 3 points (1 match remaining)

DJZ – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Mandrews – 0 points (1 match remaining)

Clip of the Wolves getting the Tag Team Titles back recently.

The Wolves say they’ve fought before and they’ll do it again tonight. Hugs all around.

Young promises to do something to Roode tonight and he’s biding his time.

It’s finally time for the Hardy interview. First up he talks about falling off the cage to knock him onto the stairs (read as: the annual injury angle because he can’t go to Europe). This led to Hardy’s Revenge against James Storm in the cage where he completely changed form. After winning the Tag Team Titles with Matt, he broke his leg in the motorcycle accident. We see a clip of the crash and Jeff barely remembers anything about it because of the pain from breaking his leg. We’ll see part two later. Thank goodness because this was a lot of nothing.

Group Tag Team Specialists: Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards

They come out together as partners. Slow feeling out process to start as the grab a test of strength and monkey flip each other over before going to the mat for near falls. They both raise one arm, then they both raise the other arm, then they both raise both arms. I knew that before it happened because I’ve seen that same sequence multiple times over the years. Both guys have kicks to the ribs caught because they’re mirroring each other the entire way.

Back with the guys actually doing something on their own with Davey missing a charge in the corner and getting kneed in the head. We’re under five minutes now and Eddie slaps on a chinlock. They get back up and Eddie scores with a running kick in the corner. He takes too much time going up top though and gets caught with a running spinwheel kick, setting up a superplex from Davey.

We hit two minutes left and Eddie kicks Davey in the head again but Davey escapes the Backpack Stunner. Richards misses a top rope double stomp and we have a minute to go. A pinfall reversal sequence gets us nowhere and they strike it out until the clock runs out for a draw at 15:00.

Rating: C-. I never want to see these two fight again. I’m well aware that there’s an audience for the performance style stuff they had before the break, but that kind of stuff is the least realistic style of wrestling that I’ve ever seen. I understand the idea is that they know each other perfectly well, but it’s basically saying “yeah they’re working together”. The second half was much better, though still not great.

Group Tag Team Specialists

Matt Hardy – 6 points (1 match remaining)

Robbie E. – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Eddie Edwards – 1 points (1 match remaining)

Davey Richards – 1 points (1 match remaining)

The draw means Matt Hardy has advanced to the round of sixteen.

The Wolves think they have something special and will be friends forever.

Part two of Jeff’s interview starts with a discussion of Jeff being broken up by having to watch Matt vacate the Tag Team Titles. This led to Matt challenging for the World Title and Ethan turning it into a way to take Jeff’s dignity away. He doesn’t regret betting on his brother but he didn’t like having to wake Ethan up for his workout and making sure Tyrus watched Sesame Street. It was a great feeling to see Matt win a title and be in the solo dimension. When Matt wins the title back, Jeff will be the loudest cheerer of all. This was a bit better but the interview was more like Jeff’s year in review.

Roode tells Young to hit him now but Young says he’s already inside Roode’s head.

Pope makes some predictions with the swiping game.

Group Wild Card: Mahabali Shera vs. Kenny King

Kenny says if Mahabali wants to be Shera, he’ll be He-Man and that ring is his Eternia. Wouldn’t that be gimmick infringement on Eli Drake? Shera shoulders him down a few times to start but gets taken down into a headlock. King sends Shera to the floor for a big corkscrew dive with a forearm hitting Shera in the head. Back in and we hit the chinlock followed by an enziguri for two. Shera comes back with a suplex and pulls King out of the air with the Sky High for the pin at 5:52.

Rating: C. Face it: Shera is getting this monster push for the India tapings and that’s all there is to it. He’s a bit better now, but dear goodness hearing about that stupid dance while they’re over in India is going to be tough to take. As usual, TNA feels the need to appeal to the live audience instead of the people at home and this is the result. Decent enough match but as usual, just moves until someone gets a pin.

Group Wild Card

Mahabali Shera – 6 points (1 match remaining)

Kenny King – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Aiden O’Shea – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Crazzy Steve – 0 points (1 match remaining)

We recap the night.

Quick video on Roode vs. Young.

Group TNA Originals: Eric Young vs. Bobby Roode

We start after a break and Young is quickly sent to the floor, only to snap Roode’s throat over the top rope. Young stays on the throat with a catapult into the middle rope and we hit the neck crank. A quick neckbreaker gets two on Roode but he comes back with an enziguri for a delayed fall. Roode grabs a spinebuster for two and counters the piledriver into a jackknife cover for two. Back up and Young grabs the referee for a distraction, setting up the piledriver for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: C. Decent enough match but these videos designed to make these regular matches feel like some big showdown between epic rivals really aren’t working. Young and Roode are the likely winners of the group as Storm seems to be gone but Abyss is always a possibility. Good enough here as Roode at least stayed on the neck for a story.

Group TNA Originals

Bobby Roode – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Abyss – 3 points (1 point remaining)

James Storm – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Eric Young – 3 points (1 match remaining)

Overall Rating: D+. The show was WAY better than last week but that doesn’t mean the major problems have gone. This is the fifth week in a row where they’ve followed the same formula: a few nothing matches, a ton of analysis from Josh and Pope, then a TNA Greatest Hits main event. Thankfully we can FINALLY see some light at the end of a very long tunnel as all of the groups other than Future Four have had two matches each and we even have one person in the final sixteen. The Series continues to be very well structured and executed but the wrestling mostly ranges from average to boring and that’s not good.

Results

Madison Rayne b. Brooke – Rayne Drop

Bram b. Rockstar Spud – Brighter Side of Suffering

Manik b. Mandrews – Kick to the head

Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards went to a time limit draw

Mahabali Shera b. Kenny King – Sky High

Eric Young b. Bobby Roode – Piledriver

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – October 14, 2015: Deal With It

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 14, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s the second week of the World Title Series (love the effort that went into that name) and tonight we get to see the other four groups to complete the field. It should be interesting to see how they can fit in this many people given their roster limitations, meaning we might be in for some extra surprises. The action last week was good so hopefully it continues in that direction this week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the World Title situation and last week. This still doesn’t make the whole thing feel any less messy and overcomplicated to get to the conclusion of a tournament.

It’s time to announce the new groups.

Group Tag Team Specialists

Matt Hardy

Eddie Edwards

Davey Richards

Robbie E.

Group Future Four

Jesse Godderz

Mica

Eli Drake

Crimson

Group X-Division

Tigre Uno

DJZ

Mandrews

Manik

Group TNA Originals

James Storm

Bobby Roode

Abyss

Eric Young

Yes Manik and not TJP because this was taped months ago and new storylines are erased.

We get a challenge from Robbie E. for NFL superstar Rob Gronkowski for some point in the future. Ignore him saying that he’ll beat Gronkowski worse than the Dallas Cowboys as that game already happened.

Group Tag Team Specialists: Matt Hardy vs. Davey Richards

So it’s Group Rockers. Davey takes him down to start and works on a leg lock but lets it go just as quickly. We get a chat from the round table discussion where Davey is pretty passive about the whole thing but Matt wants the title back. They head to the apron with Matt grabbing a quick Side Effect to send Davey to the floor.

Back in and Matt hooks a sleeper but Davey fights back with a jawbreaker to knock Matt to the floor, followed by a suicide dive. Josh: “Of course the ending to Bound For Glory has been trending for two weeks.” Back in and Davey fires off kicks until Matt grabs the Side Effect for two more. Matt dives into a kick to the ribs but Davey misses a top rope double stomp, setting up the Twist of Fate to give Matt the pin at 9:06.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with Matt doing his normal stuff and Davey doing all of his kicks. Matt would have been fine for a token title reign but giving him one in the spot they did it and the quick fallout are going to make it much more infamous than a feel good moment. You almost have to expect Matt to advance into the round of sixteen, likely winding up against Galloway or Carter down the line.

Group Tag Team Specialists

Matt Hardy – 3 points (2 matches remaining)

Robbie E. – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Eddie Edwards – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Davey Richards – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

We take a look at Beer Money splitting and Roode taking the World Title from Storm.

Group X-Division argued about who is the least likely to advance. Bart Simpson jokes are made.

Pope predicts DJZ and Tigre Uno advance from the group for his fearless predictions.

Group Wildcard: Aiden O’Shea vs. Kenny King

The announcers act like O’Shea is an unknown who had never been seen before Bound For Glory. We go split screen for the round table (with the roundtable being far bigger than the match) and come back with King getting two off a sunset flip as Bradley’s pants have split. A spinning kick to the face drops O’Shea but the Royal Flush is countered. Instead it’s a springboard Blockbuster to give Kenny the pin at 4:44.

Rating: C-. So Shelton Benjamin pinned Sheamus. A good chunk of the match was spent on the round table where O’Shea thought King could win because he’s handsome. I actually like the idea of O’Shea as there’s always room for a big power brawler. No he isn’t going anywhere but it’s nice to have him around.

Group Wildcard

Kenny King – 3 points (2 matches remaining)

Crazzy Steve – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Mahabali Shera – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Aiden O’Shea – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

Eric Young says he’s exposing Abyss for the worthless freak that he is tonight.

Davey Richards says he lost a fair match to a better man tonight.

Here’s your latest filler: we see a group and Pope swipes right if he thinks the wrestler wins or swipes left if he thinks they lose. Abyss and Roode to win and Young and Storm to lose.

Group TNA Originals argue over who is eliminated. Storm and Abyss are annoyed over the Revolution fallout.

Group TNA Originals: Eric Young vs. Abyss

Abyss splashes him in the corner to start but Eric bites the hand to block a chokeslam as we take a break. Back with the brawl heading to the break and Abyss sending him into the steps to take over. Young starts choking a lot but dives into a chokeslam attempt. Abyss has to settle for a Samoan drop for two, followed by the chokeslam for the same. Janice is brought in but Hebner takes it away, allowing Eric to get in a low blow and the top rope elbow for two. The Black Hole Slam gives Abyss the quick pin at 10:39.

Rating: D+. This is the match where the reality of this Series sat in for me. Yeah the concept isn’t bad and they’ve organized it really well, but this is probably all we’re getting for the next two to three months: mediocre matches that only exist for the sake of the tournament with no one interested in doing anything outside of the ordinary. Such is life in TNA.

Group TNA Originals

Abyss – 3 points (2 matches remaining)

James Storm – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Bobby Roode – 0 points (3 matches remaining)

Eric Young – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

Ethan Carter III, on a bad Skype connection, says he was robbed of the title at Bound For Glory. He’s going to win and isn’t worried about fighting Lashley next week. This tournament doesn’t end until he wins it. Carter is really good at these closing lines.

Young says everyone is against him but he’ll win in the end.

Abyss says tonight was Young’s night. Roode and Storm will have their nights.

Group Tag Team Specialist: Eddie Edwards vs. Robbie E.

Feeling out process to start until Eddie gets in a running knee to the face. Robbie sends him out to the floor and takes Eddie down with a nice dive. A legdrop gets two on Eddie as we hear Matt Hardy picking Robbie E. as the least likely to advance. They slug it out on the floor until Eddie takes over with some chops, only to walk into the Boom Drop for two. So much for Robbie’s chances. The backpack Stunner out of the corner gets the same for Eddie but Robbie grabs a reverse DDT for the clean pin at 5:49.

Rating: C+. This was actually a lot better than I was expecting and I like the idea of Robbie getting a win here. I can’t imagine he goes anywhere in this thing but it’s cool to see him going somewhere and not being treated as a joke for a change. Edwards continues to be far better than Richards in just about every way.

Group Tag Team Specialists

Matt Hardy – 3 points (2 matches remaining)

Robbie E. – 3 points (2 matches remaining)

Eddie Edwards – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

Davey Richards – 0 points (2 matches remaining)

Eddie shakes his hand post match.

Impact Wrestling – September 2, 2015: I Hated This Show

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 2, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s full on war now as the Global Force roster attacked several TNA wrestlers last week with Karen Jarrett revealing that she was behind the attacks on Drew Galloway and Bully Ray in recent weeks. In addition to the invasion, it’s almost time for Bound For Glory, which really hasn’t been set up yet. Let’s get to it.

The Hardys and Ethan Carter III arrived earlier. Carter defends against Matt Hardy tonight and if he retains, Jeff Hardy is Carter’s personal assistant.

We recap Karen Jarrett being revealed as the evil mastermind last week.

The Jarretts lead the GFW roster to the ring. Jeff talks (again) about returning on June 24 and being inducted into the Hall of Fame. He brags about all the success the GFW/TNA show had but Karen cuts him off to explain that she did everything for all the hard work her husband has put in for GFW. Yes she set these wheels in motion and had Chris Adonis take out Bully Ray. Jeff is building a new empire and no one in the back can compete with these boys. Adonis issues an open challenge to anyone in the back so here’s Lashley.

Lashley vs. Chris Mordetzky

Lashley throws him down to start and then drops Chris with a clothesline. The Mordetzky Lock (full nelson) is quickly countered into a full nelson slam but Mordetzky nails a Polish Hammer (double ax handle to the chest) to take over. We hit the chinlock before they head outside with Lashley being sent into the steps. Back in and a butterfly suplex seems to annoy Lashley more than hurt him. A double clothesline puts both guys down and it’s Lashley up first with a German suplex. The spear is countered into a spinebuster but Lashley easily blocks the full nelson. Now the spear connects but here’s GFW for the DQ at 8:57.

Rating: D+. Totally meh match here as this was nothing to see and just a match to show that Mordetsky is part of GFW’s roster. I still have no reason to care about a group of people who have been around for a month and range from no one interesting to WWE rejects. Nothing to see here.

Lashley gets destroyed so here are the Wolves for a failed save. Jeff says bring out the surprise so here she is with the Tag Team Title Feast or Fired briefcase. She says Magnus gave it to her, which apparently you can just do.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Brian Myers/Trevor Lee

Wait a minute because Earl Hebner won’t do it, earning him a right hand from Jeff. Another referee is forced to ringside and the match is on. Trevor dropkicks Edwards down for two as this is actually a regular match for a change. Myers comes in for a slam of his own but the Wolves come back with stereo submission holds, only to break them up to go after Sonjay Dutt. Myers brings in a pipe but the distraction lets Lee blast Davey with the briefcase for the pin and the titles at 2:35. There’s your token title win to make this invasion IMPORTANT.

Bobby Roode only cares about winning the King of the Mountain Title tonight.

Long recap of everything that just happened.

Ethan Carter III talks about his love of stories and how tonight, Matt’s story of going for the World Title ends tonight.

King of the Mountain Title: PJ Black vs. Bobby Roode

Black is defending and Roode stops to brag about being a TNA original. This is TNA’s house and Roode is bringing the title home. It’s a brawl on the floor to start as Matthews mistakenly says Black won the title last week. They get inside for some chops but Black blocks a suplex and sends Roode outside for a suicide dive. A springboard clothesline drops Roode and we take a break. Back with Roode winning a slugout and getting two off a spinebuster.

The Roode Bomb is broken up and Gabriel gets two off a reverse DDT. Black’s top rope Lionsault hits knees though and Roode slaps on the Crossface, only to have Dutt come out for a distraction. It doesn’t work this time though as Roode puts the Crossface back on. Drew Galloway takes Dutt out and Black….is free because Roode let it go for no apparent reason. Black’s springboard is countered into the Roode Bomb for the pin and the title at 13:15.

Rating: C+. The match was fine but what does this title change mean? That would be nothing, because the title has no important lineage and has been thrown out there for some meaningless changes. It’s the old Russo idea that you can get people to care because the title changes without the idea of making people care about the title in the first place.

Post match GFW chases Roode off and Jeff rants about everything going on here. Cue Dixie and OH DEAR GOD SHUT UP! They’re going back and forth about stabbing each other in the back and all the mistakes each other has made like ANYONE cares. Jeff brings up his ownership stake and Dixie proposes a winner take all match. Jeff agrees and Drew Galloway comes out to be on Dixie’s team. Drew wants to stand up for TNA and the Wolves and Lashley come out to join him in Team TNA.

Dinero and Matthews talk about what just happened.

Here’s the returning Kenny King with a mic in hand. He’s been going through an identity crisis in the last year but now he’s just here on his own. Kenny doesn’t want to be the kind of guy who jumps someone from behind and uses a numbers advantage to beat someone down. He issues an open challenge to anyone from any roster to come fight him right now.

Bram vs. Kenny King

Bram goes right after King to start but Kenny takes him down with a nice dive. He tries it once too often though and eats a clothesline to give Bram control. King comes back with a running elbow in the corner, followed by an enziguri to put Bram in the corner. Bram ducks another dive though and the Brighter Side of Suffering gives Bram the pin at 3:37.

Rating: D+. So King comes back, turns face, and loses in less than four minutes. That being said, this match was nothing to see but it calmed me down a lot after the stupid hostile takeover stuff had me losing my mind. This was something different than that one big story, though it was stupid in its own way.

The Hardys say Matt will win the title. Has there been a more tacked on feud than this in recent years?

Here’s Velvet Sky with something to say. She’s been keeping to herself since she got back for a reason. The Knockouts division has been evolving constantly and so has she. The Dollhouse is out of control and Taryn is going to pay. Velvet tells Taryn to come out here but she comes up on screen to say how sick she is of being compared to Velvet as the hot blonde in TNA.

Taryn has been in movies and on TV but Velvet looks like a Hot Topic reject. This is Taryn’s house and now she has to play with Taryn’s dolls. Cue the Dollhouse, who quickly beats Tarn down. Angelina Love and Madison Rayne come out and yes, the Beautiful People are back.

Video on Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III in Full Metal Mayhem, which of course set up tonight’s regular match.

Dixie gives Team TNA their pep talk. It’s Lethal Lockdown in two weeks for full control.

TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III

Ethan is defending and if Matt loses, Jeff Hardy is Ethan’s personal assistant. Josh: “EC3 and Matt Hardy have been rivals for quite some time.” No Josh, they haven’t been. Feeling out process to start until Matt hits a running Diamond Cutter (called a neckbreaker) for two. A big clothesline puts the champion on the floor and it’s off to a break. Back with Carter missing a middle rope elbow but putting on a sleeper.

Matt fights up and nails some clotheslines, followed by the Side Effect. The referee gets bumped off the Twist of Fate attempt though and there’s no one to count. A belt shot to Matt’s head gets two because Matt WILL NOT DIE, which seems to be code for WILL NOT STOP DRAGGING OUT OBVIOUS ENDINGS. Jeff gets in a cheap shot on Carter to give Matt two but they ram heads and Carter falls on top for two. Tyrus grabs Matt’s leg and gets chaired by Jeff, only to have Ethan hit a TKO on Matt for two more. The referee gets distracted again and a low blow and sunset flip retain Carter’s title at 13:17.

Rating: C. Wow you know what that wasn’t? Epic. You know why it wasn’t? Because they did the big gimmick match three weeks ago and this company is too stupid to figure out that they shouldn’t do things in that order. The match was fine but I have no reason to care about Matt Hardy as a lame duck challenger before we get to the Bound For Glory and whatever they have planned there.

Jeff now has to work for Carter and is forced to raise the champ’s hand to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. I’ve sat through a lot from TNA over the years. I survived Immortal, THEY, all of Russo’s nonsense and Dixieland. Tonight, for the first time, I got mad at them over how bad things got. This invasion is one of the worst written, lamest attempts at doing something that I’ve ever seen. Case in point: if the blowoff is in two weeks, the whole story lasted five shows. Even the WWF InVasion, one of the most botched stories ever, ran several months before the big ending.

Instead, TNA has decided that we care about the power struggle (because they’re too stupid to run ANYTHING BUT A POWER STRUGGLE) between Jeff and Dixie, leaving Ethan Carter III, a guy who could have been a much bigger deal for them, fighting the Hardys in a midcard feud. We’re a month away from Bound For Glory and their big story is going to be blown off on TV two weeks beforehand.

If TNA is going down, and I’m sure they won’t because these morons somehow back their way into deal after deal to keep this mess going another six months, they’re going out as only they can: with no idea of how to run a good show, bad storytelling, stupid decisions, and the wrong people on top because those people think the fans care about them. This was a disaster and I absolutely hated it.

Results

Lashley b. Chris Mordetzky via DQ when the GFW roster interfered

Brian Myers/Trevor Lee b. Wolves – Lee pinned Richards after a briefcase to the head

Bobby Roode b. PJ Black – Roode Bomb

Bram b. Kenny King – Brighter Side of Suffering

Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Sunset flip

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – May 22, 2015 (International Impact): Oh Yeah They Knew

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 22, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

So since Destination America basically threw up a middle finger at TNA on Memorial Day weekend, there was no new episode aired on Friday May 22. However, there was a show airing internationally which has since come online. This is a few weeks old but here it is for the sake of completeness. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Hardys having to vacate the Tag Team Titles due to Jeff breaking his leg in a motocross accident, setting up the best of five series between the Dirty Heels and the Wolves.

D’Angelo Dinero is brought out for commentary. Granted that doesn’t mean much here as the only version I could find was in French.

Mandrews vs. Manik vs. Tigre Uno vs. Crazzy Steve vs. Argos vs. Rockstar Spud

Elimination match with no tags because that’s what the X-Division consists of these days. Spud starts fast and cleans house as Steve sits in the corner holding a monkey. Tigre dives over the top to take Manik out before Steve intentionally dives onto no one. He’s crazy you see. Mandrews sends Argos to the apron for a crash onto everyone, leaving Mandrews to hit a great looking shooting star onto the pile.

Back in and Manik pulls Steve out of the way of another Madrews shooting star (which would have missed by three feet anyway), setting up a rollup to get rid of Mandrews. Steve has silly string and clotheslines Manik in the corner, setting up a Cannonball for two. Wait….now there are tags? After that huge mess and insanity they have tags now??? Argos comes in for more clotheslines to Manik, followed by a reverse Shell Shock from Tigre for two. It’s strange to not hear the commentary as there’s far less to make fun of.

Steve comes back in to rip at Tigre’s mask, earning him a kick to the back of the head. Argos runs back in for a gorilla press gutbuster to eliminate Steve. It’s Argos vs. Spud now with Tigre coming in to double team the Rockstar. Tigre goes up top for a kind of top rope seated senton low blow for two and we take a break. Back with Argos hitting a running hurricanrana on Manik as we see Tigre being eliminated during the break to get us down to three.

Spud dropkicks Manik down and hits the Underdog on Argos for an elimination, leaving Spud vs. Manik. They slug it out with Spud getting the better of it with a bunch of punches and some running forearms. The Underdog is broken up and Manik gets two off his tiger suplex into a gutbuster. The same sequence sees Spud counter the gutbuster into a rollup for a near fall, followed by an Underdog from the apron to the ring for the pin at 15:23.

Rating: C. Well, you had six guys, they did moves to each other for fifteen minutes, and one of them didn’t get pinned. That’s what the X-Division has become: meaningless matches with someone coming out on top and no real reason to care about most of them. Other than Spud, these guys are almost interchangeable as far as levels of interest, so why should I care that he beat all of them?

Long recap of the BroMans rise and eventual split. It’s clear that they’re filling a lot of time.

Jesse arrives (sans shirt of course) and says he beat up Robbie because he’s better. Robbie got on a reality TV show after Jesse did so Robbie should be thanking him for his entire career. Robbie can be the Bro, but Jesse will be the Man.

Spud says that’s one step closer to getting the X-Division Title back. The people are with him, not Kenny King.

Jesse Godderz vs. DJZ

Before the match, Jesse says he’s the superstar and the reason they won the Tag Team Titles. He knows he and Zema are supposed to fight, but it would be the same ending that Robbie E. suffered. Jesse isn’t losing to a nobody. A serious DJZ comes out and says he was the X-Division Champion before the BroMans and Jesse was nothing. That’s enough to start the fight with DJZ hitting a quick running hurricanrana to send Jesse outside. A jawbreaker staggers Jesse (you might even say it stuns him) and it’s all DJZ so far.

Jesse comes back with a great dropkick and slaps on an armbar of all things. That goes as far as an armbar is going to go when your name isn’t Alberto and Jesse hot shots him down. DJZ kicks away what appeared to be a Figure Four and hits a Thesz press, only to get stomped back down. A Boston crab of all things makes DJZ give up.

Rating: D+. Jesse is trying and playing a decent heel, but at the end of the day he’s a pretty boy bodybuilder using a Boston crab as his big finisher. That’s not going to get him very far, but this is better than anything else he’s ever done as a singles guy. Robbie E. coming back for a big showdown could be entertaining though.

Magnus says this is about James Storm.

Video on Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle with Young being…….oh you know it by now.

Video on James Storm manipulating Mickie James for reasons that aren’t clear yet aside from he’s evil. Mickie’s fiance Magnus isn’t cool with this. He’ll be a lot less cool with it when he shoves her onto train tracks.

Magnus comes out for a match but says he has to deal with James Storm messing with his family, plus Storm’s Revolution. A few weeks back, Khoya hit him with a big piece of wood. Maybe that’s overcompensating for a smaller piece of wood?

Magnus vs. Khoya

Magnus stomps him down to start and they head outside with Khoya being sent into the barricade. A suplex gets some two counts and for no apparent reason, Magnus puts the referee on top of Khoya and counts two more. Well of course he does. We take a break and come back with Magnus throwing him outside again as we wait for the screw up so Khoya can take over and Magnus can make the comeback.

Magnus swings Khoya’s stick but hits the post and hurts his hands, allowing Khoya to take over. Ah there it is. Khoya stomps away in the corner and clotheslines Magnus down for no cover. A corner splash misses though and Magnus starts his comeback with clotheslines followed by the top rope elbow. A pair of Spine Shakers end Khoya at 9:39.

Rating: D+. Just an extended squash here which is how you should build towards a match like Storm vs. Magnus. It wasn’t anything interesting and Magnus still isn’t worth watching in the ring, but at least he got a win here to give him some momentum before the Slammiversary match.

Bram says he’s crazy and dangerous and he has no remorse. He’s violent you see and he’s coming for Bobby Roode.

Recap of the Tag Team Title best of five series.

Dollhouse video, focusing on their war with Gail Kim and Awesome Kong. The camera slowly zooming in on Taryn’s face as Kong’s music played was a great touch.

Rebel vs. Marti Belle

Before the match, Marti says it can still be playtime even though Taryn isn’t here. Rebel is offered a chance to leave but she won’t say anything. Finally she calls the Dollhouse the Skank House and slaps Jade in the face to get things going. Marti is knocked into Jade’s arms but a baseball slide puts them both down. Jade gets in some cheap shots as Marti gets a chair because the referee is dumb enough to fall for this.

They finally get inside with Marti in control and clotheslining Rebel down to break up a comeback. Rebel scores with a slam and a headscissors, but instead of turning Marti over she pulls her into the back of the trunks for a “comedy” bit. Another Jade distraction lets Marti hit a double arm neckbreaker for the pin at 3:16.

Rating: D. Nothing special here but it’s nice to see that Marti can work a match to go along with her stable mates. It’s a boring match though, partially due to Rebel being little more than a model who they trained to take some bumps. Dull stuff here as you can see the big divide between the top and bottom tiers of Knockouts.

Kenny King isn’t worried about Rockstar Spud and the X-Division Title.

X-Division Title: Mica vs. Kenny King

Oh so King is champion here. I didn’t actually know coming into this. King bails to start but Mica catches him with some right hands to knock the champ outside. Back in and an armbar slows Mica down but he comes back with a slam for two. Not exactly inspiring stuff so far. Mica’s ram into the buckle is countered with King snapping his throat across the ropes before firing some right hands into the face. A spinning kick to the face gets two on Mica but he comes back with a Samoan drop for two more. That’s it for him though as the Royal Flush retains King’s title at 6:40.

Rating: D+. I just do not care about this feud whether there’s a title involved or not. King is fine as the X-Division Champion but Mica and Drake are so dull and uninteresting that there’s almost no way to care about any of them. The fact that the match was dull made it even worse.

Bobby Roode was the World Champion at wrestling but he’s capable of fighting against someone like Bram.

Campaign ad for Ethan Carter III for World Champion. Him winning the title will bring down unemployment and help with the millennial problem. Unfortunately this is used to set up Carter vs. Anderson’s boring match.

Bobby Roode vs. Bram

Roode is the clear face here despite being half of the Dirty Heels tag team because TNA doesn’t think these things through. Bobby cranks on the arm to start but Bram keeps going to the ropes. After a breather on the floor, Bobby knocks him right back to the floor as they’re in first gear so far. Back from a break with the Blockbuster getting two on Bram but he rolls outside and posts Bobby to take over.

More brawling offense from Bram on the floor but Roode slugs away back inside. That earns him a hard whip into the buckle for two and a charge into a boot, only to have Bram charge into a spinebuster. There’s the Roode Bomb but Bram rolls to the floor instead of getting covered, landing in front of a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles bag. Roode posts him but has to avoid the referee back inside, earning him a low blow and a handful of trunks to give Bram the pin at 14:05.

Rating: C. Totally average main event here with Roode dominating most of the match and then losing to a fluke at the end. That being said, I like the idea of having Bram get a main event win, even if the next few weeks have shown us that this changed nothing and was really just a match.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh yeah they knew no one was going to watch this show. It was basically a few steps ahead of a One Night Only show, which means you could miss the show and not lose a bit of anything. Nothing show here with a few watchable matches sprinkled throughout. In other words: standard Impact.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling – May 29, 2015: Does It Really Matter Anymore?

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 29, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Al Snow

After all the insanity that’s been going on behind the scenes in this company, they’re really in need for a good show to calk things down a bit. This show is being billed as May Mayhem, which is their version of a pay per view this month. The main event is Eric Young challenging Kurt Angle in an I Quit match. Let’s get to it.

Eric Young pulls up to the arena where Kurt Angle is waiting on him. They slug it out in the parking lot until security breaks it up.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell

Inside a cage with Taryn defending. Gail goes right after her in the aisle and takes over before the bell. They finally get inside with Kim still dominating until Marti Belle reaches through the cage to pull Gail down, allowing Taryn to ram the ring finger into the cage to take over. Gail fights back again with ease until she tries to climb out, allowing the Dollhouse to interfere again, allowing Taryn to hit a quick Cutter for the pin at 5:20.

Rating: D. Well aside from how great Taryn looked, this was borderline worthless. At the end of the day, you need more than five minutes for a cage match. This is supposed to be some big blowoff to the feud and instead the whole thing can’t even make it to six minutes? The Dollhouse is awesome, but they played it pretty straight here, which defeats the purpose.

Post match the Dollhouse goes after Gail until Awesome Kong comes out. They manage to lock the door though, setting up the big beatdown. Taryn takes Gail’s ring off and stomps on Gail’s ring finger, apparently breaking it so the ring can’t go back on. Josh: “I know Taryn has issues we’re not supposed to talk about on air but this is going too far.”

So, unless they’re actually going to say what happened in Taryn’s marriage, this is going to be another big tease that never goes anywhere. Also, this would be more effective if they didn’t keep name dropping Gail’s celebrity chef husband, who is so famous that I’ve already forgotten his name.

Quick recap of James Storm being creepy and getting Mickie James to come back for one more match. Her husband Magnus isn’t pleased with this but that’s exactly what Storm wanted. Josh: “This isn’t PG.”

Here’s Mickie (in a very, very revealing dress) to talk about things. She can’t wait for the one more match but tonight she needs to talk about family and the heart. Magnus is her fiance, but James Storm has been a friend for years now. This brings out Storm, prompting Mickie to apologize for Magnus bashing him in the head with a guitar. James doesn’t need to hear that but Mickie insists on apologizing, even though Magnus is just trying to protect his family.

Storm insists he’s not a bad guy (has any good guy ever had to say that?) because if holding a door open for a woman or keeping her from getting attacked by Bram makes you a bad man, then yeah he’s a bad man. We hear about all the gifts James bought the family but Mickie didn’t think some of them were that funny.

James redeems himself by surprising Mickie by saying he’s set up some meetings with big names (like Billy Corgan) who want to meet Mickie and advance her career. Whatever Mickie picks, he’ll have her back. Storm leaves and Mickie tells the Cowboy (her word) she’ll see them in Nashville. There was a very subtle addition here as Storm kept inching closer to Mickie, making her back up a half step every little bit.

Kenny King isn’t worred about defending the X-Division Title in a gauntlet match.

Eric Young shows us a Tweet that we can’t see and headbutts through a window.

X-Division Title: Gauntlet Match

Why do we always need a gauntlet match or an elimination match or something other than a scheduled one on one match? There are seven people in this and another enters every 90 seconds. The first five will be eliminated over the top but when there are only two left, it’s a regular match for the win. Manik is in first and Rockstar Spud is in second and Champion Kenny King will be in seventh. Both guys go for eliminations until Manik sends him into the corner and DJZ, now with a blue/purple mohawk, is in third.

Manik gets double teamed until Mandrews is in fourth after a low less than ninety seconds. Spud and Mandrews team up on Manik but Spud can’t quite get him out, even as he bites Manik’s fingers. No one is eliminated yet and Argos is in fifth to speed things up for all of five seconds. Mandrews misses a shooting star and gets sent to the apron, setting up a kick to the face and a ram into the post for the first elimination. Crazzy Steve is in sixth as we take a break.

Back with Tigre Uno, who entered sixth during the break, being eliminated. Kenny King comes in seventh and the final group is everyone other than Tigre Uno. A big kick to the head drops Manik and another kick does the same to Young. Steve gets in a few shots and chokes over the ropes, only to get superkicked out to put us at five. Argos gets kicked to the floor for an elimination, followed by Spud jumping on King’s back. He manages to avoid elimination but eats the Royal Flush.

DJZ gets back up with a belly to back suplex into a facebuster on King, only to get backdropped out by Manik a few seconds later. Down to Manik, Spud and King with Manik offering an alliance with the champ. Spud is tossed to the apron but Manik jumps King from behind, only to be thrown out with an assist from Spud to get us down to the singles match. King chops Spud down and rips at his face but the Royal Flush is countered into a small package to give Spud the title at 16:48.

Rating: D+. So here’s one of TNA’s major troubles explained in one match. This was a major title match and had no build, no hype, and nothing interesting. There was no drama to anything here as the people came in and were eliminated before we got down to the final two for a very quick match with Spud winning. There was no reason to care about this and it a lot of that is due to how the match was booked instead of the action. The wrestlers didn’t have time to do anything and it caught up with them quickly.

Dirty Heels vs. Wolves

This is match #2 in a best of five series with the Wolves up 1-0. Roode throws Aries through the ropes for a suicide dive to start but Davey runs inside for a dive of his own on Aries. The Wolves double team Roode inside until Austin gets back in and things settle down a bit. Edwards chops away at Aries but Austin punches him in the face, setting up a tag to Roode for chops of his own.

The Heels (who aren’t heels) load up what looked like a Sharpshooter but Aries gets kicked into his partner, allowing the Wolves to double team even more. Davey puts Rode into a reverse figure four (with Roode facing the mat and Davey facing up) for a unique looking submission. The German suplex into the jackknife rollup gets two as the announcers are overhyping the heck out of this. Eddie puts Roode in a chinlock for a bit until Bobby fights up and makes the hot tag to Aries.

Austin speeds things up and snaps both Wolves’ throats across the top, setting up a missile dropkick to Edwards. There’s the Last Chancery on Davey and a Crossface to Eddie but both Wolves make the ropes. Something like Chasing the Dragon but with a Michinoku Driver instead of a brainbuster gets two on Aries but he pops right back up for the running dropkick in the corner, followed by the 450 to Eddie with Davey making the save. Another Last Chancery has Edwards in trouble but Richards comes in off the top with a double stomp for the save, setting up the powerbomb into a Backstabber to pin Austin at 11:09.

Rating: B. This was straight out of the indy playbook with the entire match being action from bell to bell. That sounds cool on paper, but between everything going all over the place and Josh telling us about two minutes in that this was a classic and something we were going to remember forever, the match kind of dulled on me very quickly. It’s definitely fun, but I prefer building up to the insane finish instead of just having it run the entire match.

Kenny King can’t get hold of MVP and wants him to call back.

Here’s Angelina Love to deal with Velvet Sky, who is sitting in the audience. Love brings out her own personal security to deal with Velvet if she tries anything. She screams at Velvet (with a voice that Vickie Guerrero would find annoying) and tells her to try something, of course drawing Velvet over the barricade for a quick beating until security pulls her off. Sky beats up security and goes after Love again until she’s handcuffed and taken away.

Mr. Anderson is very happy to not have Tyrus around for his match with Ethan Carter III tonight.

Ethan Carter III vs. Mr. Anderson

Anderson has a one man cage to lock Tyrus inside, guaranteeing that it’s one on one. Amazingly enough, Tyrus doesn’t want to go in so Anderson goes after him, allowing Carter to ram him face first into the cage. Back in and a quick suplex gets two for Carter as Snow challenges Dixie Carter to a street fight. A running clothesline gets two more on Anderson but he throws Carter through the ropes and into Tyrus, who still isn’t in the cage. Anderson nails Tyrus with a chair a few times to FINALLY get him in the stupid cage.

They slug it out back inside with Anderson taking over with the usual. A powerslam and backdrop get two each but Mr. gets crotched on top, setting up a TKO for two. Carter hits a Stinger Splash (complete with shout) but the 1%er is countered into a Regal Roll and Swanton for the same. The Mic Check connects for two and Anderson is stunned. He loads up another but Carter counters into a 1%er for the clean pin at 8:00.

Rating: C-. That’s a pretty clear ending to the feud, but my goodness TNA needs to slow down. This match started with a flurry with the Tyrus stuff then was just trading big moves for a few minutes until Carter won. They have to speed through everything on every show because they need to get so much stuff in. Calm down a bit and spread some stuff out so that stuff like this can have time to breathe.

Anderson offers a handshake but Carter shoves the hand away. Tyrus is left in the cage.

Rockstar Spud is very, very happy to be a two time champion. He hasn’t even had time to think about Destination X and Option C yet but maybe he needs a new goal.

TNA World Title: Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending and this is an I Quit match. Both guys come out with security after being separated all night in another idea that didn’t go anywhere. Angle goes right at him to start and they’re slugging it out a minute in. Eric tries to jump over him in the corner but gets caught in rolling Germans to knock him even sillier. He won’t quit though so Kurt rolls even more Germans, only to be sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Young slapping on a Figure Four for a bit until Angle turns it over, sending Young to the ropes.

Eric can’t get an Angle Slam so he puts Kurt in an ankle lock with a grapevine, only to have Kurt reverse into something resembling a Figure Four. More ropes are grabbed so Young goes up, only to dive into the real ankle lock. Young taps so Angle lets go, but Young never said I Quit. The distraction lets Young hit a low blow and piledriver. Still no quitting so Young loads up another piledriver, only to be countered into the ankle lock with the grapevine to retain Angle’s title at 13:10.

Rating: C-. Raise your hand if you expected ANYTHING but that as the ending. That’s where this match and feud died with me: no one in their right mind thought Young was winning the title at any point in this feud and that makes for some very dull matches. The match was watchable, but my goodness don’t let this feud keep going any longer and get Young down the card where he belongs.

Overall Rating: D+. This one didn’t do it for me. They were flying through every possible thing they could get through tonight and it made the show a lot weaker than it should have been. The matches were good while they lasted, but none of them had time to set up any kind of story or psychology, which really kills the show.

We’ve got a few weeks before Slammiversary and then just a few weeks before Destination X and then a few months before the show is probably getting kicked off the air because not enough people watch it. Could it be because they rush through hastily announced gimmick matches like these and don’t let anything have a proper build because they have to get through everything they can when they have two pay per views a year and seemingly could do things at whatever pace they want? This was an action heavy show but the lack of a foundation takes away anything good they had set up.

Results

Taryn Terrell b. Gail Kim – Cutter

Rockstar Spud won a gauntlet match, last eliminating Kenny King – Small package

Wolves b. Dirty Heels – Powerbomb into a backstabber to Aries

Ethan Carter III b. Mr. Anderson – 1%er

Kurt Angle b. Eric Young – Ankle lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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TNA One Night Only – X-Travaganza III: What Do You Want Me To Say?

X-Travaganza III
Date: May 6, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 1,100
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jeremy Borash

I guess this is considered the beginning of a new season of these shows as the first X-Travaganza was the first ever One Night Only. Barring a big surprise, this is going to be a series of qualifying matches for an Ultimate X match for money later on in the night. These shows really are good illustrations of how far the division has fallen in recent years. Let’s get to it.

We open with the standard speech about how important this division is to TNA’s history. Notice that as the division has fallen into obscurity, the company’s success has gone down as well. Of course there’s a lot more to it than that, but once TNA stopped having something to focus on other than the main event division, things kept going south. As usual, this also shows us clips from later in the night.

All matches are qualifying matches for the Ultimate X main event with $100,000 on the line unless noted otherwise.

Tigre Uno vs. Sonjay Dutt

Feeling out process to start with Sonjay taking him down with a quick armdrag before having to spin out of a wristlock. Some fast near falls get us nowhere but both guys collide to put them on the mat. Back up and Sonjay takes over with some chops and a running knee in the corner before stopping Tigre with a boot. Tigre comes back in with a dropkick for two as the announcers start talking about Twitter handles. I really hope this isn’t a descent into the usual commentary madness on these shows.

Sonjay comes back with something like an Octopus Hold and a kick to the head for two. This turns into a discussion of favorite submission holds, which is at least related to what we’re watching. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Tigre fights back, only to miss a split legged moonsault. Dutt’s standing moonsault gets two as the fans are really not all that interested here. Borash finally gets around to explaining the idea of the qualifying matches for Ultimate X later in the show. Tigre crotches himself on an attempted basement dropkick in the corner but comes right back with a rolling cradle for the fast pin (and maybe a four count).

Rating: C-. We’re already seeing the issue with this show: there’s no reason for these two to be fighting and that makes for a dull match as neither of these two did anything exciting enough to warrant having nine minutes. It’s not a bad match or anything but it’s just two guys doing moves to each other until one got a pin off a cradle.

Kenny King talks about surprising everyone by showing up in TNA and brags about all of his success. No matter what he did though, he never could get noticed until he joined up with the BDC. Tonight, we’re calling this X-Travaganza Step Up, because he wants someone to step up to become the next Kenny King. Be careful though because he’s going to knock them right back down.

Kenny King vs. Jay Rios vs. Pepper Parks

Parks wrestles all over the indies and seems to have a fitness gimmick. Rios is a lower level indy guy but he was recently on Impact as Tigre Uno’s partner in the Tag Team Title tournament against Bram/Ethan Carter III. Josh asks the returning JB how he can get around the arena to announce everything so fast. Parks kicks Rios in the head to start and stomps him down as King stands back.

The fans chant for the BDC (the only people they might know in this match) as King backdrops Parks to the floor. Rios kicks both of them through the ropes and hits an Asai moonsault to drop both opponents. Back in and Parks gets two off a sitout powerbomb as King is still on the floor. Rios sidesteps Parks’ spear to send him into King before hitting the springboard into an RKO on Parks for two.

Pepper doesn’t seem to mind as a double superkick puts King down, only to have Rios hit running boots in the corner to both opponents. King suddenly realizes he’s Kenny King and starts cleaning house but Rios shoves him off the top and hits a frog splash for two on Parks. Back up and Rios goes to the apron, only to springboard into the Royal Flush to give King the pin.

Rating: C. Better but it’s the exact same problem from the first match: I have no real reason to see these guys fight and they’re not doing anything worth seeing. In other words, these matches aren’t very interesting and make me want to go watch some old TNA matches instead of these.

Here’s a clip from Destination X 2013 where Manik won the X-Division Title in Ultimate X.

Manik vs. Mr. 450

450 is yet another indy guy who has been squashed in NXT a few times under the name Jesus de Leon. For some reason he comes out (after Manik) with a weird eyepiece that looks like something out of Star Trek (for your KB trivia: I’ve never seen a single movie or episode of Star Trek) and may supposed to be something from the future.

Wherever he’s from (yes I know it’s Puerto Rico), he grabs an armbar to start as the announcers talk about Google Glasses. They spin around a few times until 450 gets two off a springboard cross body. Manik sends him hard into the post though and things slow back down. Off to the floor now with Manik sending him into the post again as Josh laments the loss of Bernie Mac. He was in a movie called Mr. 3000 (Josh calls it Mr. 300) so it’s connected you see.

Manik grabs a cross armbreaker (at least he’s following up on the shoulder into the post, putting this match ahead of everything else on the show so far) before rolling some suplexes, capped off by a belly to back hammerlock suplex. We hit the chinlock with the arm trapped back for a bit to keep up the psychology.

450 comes back with another springboard cross body but Manik catches himself in the ropes instead of going out to the floor. He goes right outside a few seconds later though, setting up 450’s Asai moonsault. Josh clarifies that Pepper and Joseph Parks are not related before Manik hurricanranas 450 into the armbreaker for the submission.

Rating: C+. Best match of the night so far with the arm work actually playing through the match instead of just introducing it and then forgetting it just as fast. Again it’s not a great match or anything like that, but at least it was a good way to kill seven minutes. Manik is an underrated talent in the company and unfortunately he’s stuck in the lame Revolution for the time being.

Video on the Knockouts defying the limits just as well as the men do.

Taryn Terrell is in the five Knockouts ladder match later tonight and she can prove that she’s more than just a pretty face.

Great Sanada vs. Jonathan Cruz vs. Crazzy Steve

Cruz is Rios’ partner in the indies. Steve pulls out a horn as Matthews thinks Cruz is Mr. 450. Ignore the fact that neither wears a mask so this shouldn’t be too complicated. Steve goes out to the apron and waits for a tag because we’re in a comedy match. Sanada cranks on Cruz’s arm to start and they hit a nice spin out sequence for one of the few good reactions from the crowd all night long. Steve comes in with a crucifix and sunset flip for two each on Sanada before Sanada pulls on Cruz’s face.

Now the announcers talk about the places Sanada has wrestled, including the hibachi place and Nakatomi Towers. Off to an abdominal stretch on Cruz until Steve makes the save. The serious guys finally get tired of the comedy and pound Steve down like anyone sensible would do. Steve comes back with cannonballs in the corner, only to have Sanada mist Cruz in the face. A moonsault gets two with Steve making the save, setting up a DDT on Cruz to send Steve to Ultimate X.

Rating: D. The announcers have gone from amusing to Tazz land as they spent the whole match making as many Japan jokes as they could squeeze into a short match. Steve is a generic “comedy” guy who gets annoying in a hurry with neither opponent being able to do much. Sanada really should have gone forward here as he’s more than earned the spot in the last year, especially on these shows.

Rockstar Spud says he’s a great wrestler, even when he was just getting coffee for Dixie Carter. Tonight he can show why he’s a great X-Division wrestler when he wins his first Ultimate X match.

And now, since they can’t even get to 2:45 on their own, here’s the X-Division Title match from Slammiversary 2014.

X-Division Title: Sanada vs. Tigre Uno vs. Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Crazy Steve vs. Manik

Sanada is defending and this is a ladder match. Also keep in mind that Destination X and Option C are coming up soon. Manik dives through the ropes to take out Sanada before the bell. The Wolves follow suit with stereo suicide dives and Steve has apparently knocked Tigre Uno down. Steve gets a ladder from under the ring and uses it to climb back to the apron. Tigre dropkicks him down and mostly misses a corkscrew dive to take everyone out.

Sanada and Manik fight over a ladder in the ring with the champion taking over via a springboard chop to the head. Tigre replaces Manik and kicks Sanada in the back of the head but the Wolves double team him into a German suplex onto the ladder in the corner. Edwards throws in a fresh ladder but Manik dropkicks both of them down. Steve (very popular tonight) comes in for the Terry Funk spinning ladder spot, taking down everyone that comes into the ring.

Manik makes a save but Steve shoves the ladder over, only to have Manik land on the top rope and dive out to knock out the Wolves. Steve goes up again and touches the belt but of course loses his hand eye coordination since this is a ladder match, allowing Sanada to make the save. The ladder is busted so Sanada slams Steve onto it to set up the moonsault. The fans think this is awesome as Tigre enziguris Sanada off a better ladder.

Tigre wedges the broken ladder into the standing one to form a bridge, but the Wolves catch him in a powerbomb/top rope Backstabber combo. The Wolves both go after the belt but Sanada makes the save. Edwards Sanada clothesline each other to the floor and Eddie crashes into the barricade, leaving Davey on top. Manik makes the save and powerbombs Davey onto the bridged ladder in a SCARY landing. Sanada climbs up to retain at 9:40 before someone dies.

Rating: B-. The match was fun but some of those spots looked too dangerous for my taste. Richards getting powerbombed was way too scary looking and I didn’t like how he landed. Hopefully everyone is fine, but I question having people go through a match like this without even giving the match hype on TV.

Rockstar Spud vs. Dalton Castle

Castle is basically a man in a peacock costume during his entrance with and some good looking valets to disrobe him. Naturally the announcers aren’t going to explain who Castle is because they’re too busy with their “witty banter.” Castle puts his hands on his back and sticks his chest out so Spud imitates the look (one fan: “Spud’s was better!”). The pose off continues as the announcers debate this year’s Best Picture winner. They start shoving each other out of the way to pose before Spud gets one off a rollup over a minute in.

This sends Spud to the floor to call Castle a chicken. Time for a chase scene with Dalton getting taken down with a drop toehold. Matthews talks about being chased by a chicken as a kid as Spud knocks Dalton outside. Josh: “There was no choking of the chicken.” Castle throws him down to the mat and struts a bit before covering for two. Josh: “New game! Every time you say Castle’s full name, you have to give him a new middle name.” Spud screams at a slap and hits some running forearms, followed by the Underdog for the pin.

Rating: D+. I love Spud but there was only so much you can do here when the announcers are making up games to get themselves through the show. Castle needs a straight man or partner in general to play off as he doesn’t have the wrestling acumen to back him up out there. This was barely even a match after all the posing.

Matt Hardy is ready for his dream match against Austin Aries tonight. Who has been dreaming of that match? Matt talks about his career evolving all the time and now he’s going to give A Double a double dose of Mattitude.

Mikaze vs. DJZ

Mikaze had a pot of coffee back in ROH back in 2005-2006 and was squashed by Ryback one night. DJZ bails from the threat of a kick to the head and does a Karate Kid pose. Back up and Mikaze chases him out to the floor, only to have DJZ snap the back of his neck across the ropes. That’s with with Mikaze who skins the cat out to the floor and into a hurricanrana for a nice counter.

Back in and DJZ stomps him in the corner as we hear about Mikaze designing wrestling gear. Mikaze misses a springboard clothesline and a lot of choking ensues. The announcers count ropes (seriously) and laugh at the idea of Mike Tenay dying. Mikaze sends him to the floor and gets a running start before changing directions into a moonsault. That was awesome. Back in and Mikaze hits a springboard forearm (fans: “AJ STYLES!”) and Trouble in Paradise, only to get caught in a bottom rope tornado DDT to send DJZ to the Ultimate X.

Rating: C. Mikaze looked cool but the idea of sending anyone but those already on the roster to the main event is a pipe dream. DJZ is trying but he’s another example of someone who needs a partner to help him get through most of his matches. He’s mainly a comedy guy and that doesn’t translate well when he’s trying to have a regular match like this one.

Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim vs. Angelina Love vs. Brooke vs. Taryn Terrell

Ladder match for a future Knockouts Title match. I love that they can’t say who the champion is at the moment as they have no idea who it will be when this airs. Everyone goes for the ladder to start but they just wind up knocking the thing over for a big crash. Madison suplexes Taryn on the floor (Josh: “That was violent!”) and the announcers take shots at the Divas.

We get the first ladder brought in with Gail trying to get it straightened on the top rope for no apparent reason as everyone fights in the background. Angelina gets dropped face first onto the ladder but Gail and Brooke start fighting over who gets to use the ladder. Taryn is sent face first into the ladder in the corner as Angelina sets up another between the barricade and the apron.

Everyone gets knocked down in the corner until Gail is dropkicked off the apron and onto the bridged ladder. We finally get a ladder set up in the middle of the ring but Brooke shoves it over, sending Angelina and Madison crashing down. Gail pulls Taryn down but both quickly climb up, only to have Brooke pull Gail through the rungs. Gail is dangling but stops Brooke from pulling the contract down. Not that it matters as the contract falls, allowing Taryn to dive onto it for the win.

Rating: D+. I’ve never been a fan of these short gimmick matches. What’s the point in even bringing the ladders in if they’re going to be done in less than seven minutes with five girls in there? You can barely get anything going and there’s almost no drama, though Taryn winning is always a good thing.

The Wolves are ready to face each other and they’re both coming at it hard. It’s all cool though.

Package on the Wolves.

Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards

This is just a dream match instead of a qualifying match. They’re in different tights tonight to make this feel a bit different. Feeling out process to start and both guys give a clean break in the corner. They point at the crowd and lock up against the ropes as this is totally even so far. Davey can’t spin out of a wristlock but they both spin out of a hammerlock into a standoff. Now Josh talks about grilled cheese and his ability to map minds.

More technical stuff leads to a headscissors from Davey and they trade something like the surfboard’s drunk cousins. The third standoff sets up Davey nailing a dropkick and putting on an Indian deathlock, complete with a Rude hip swivel. Edwards does the same (the swivel I mean) with the surfboard knee stomp as Josh is STILL going on about the mind map stuff. Davey is sent to the floor and both guys avoid dives, setting up Eddie’s moonsault off the apron to break his heel and put him on the shelf for three months. Back in and Davey hits a pair of Creeping Deaths (Eddie: “DO IT! DO IT!”) for the pin.

Rating: C. This is a hard one to grade as it was just starting to get going when the injury took place. They didn’t want to go after each other here but they were getting into the spirit of competition right before the ending. Good enough match though and the Wolves continue to be awesome on this show.

Austin Aries says he and Matt Hardy are good in any division. He has to talk over a match ending and it’s really distracting. Isn’t there like an office or locker room deep inside the building that they could do these in instead?

Clip of Aries beating Roode in the first Option C cash-in.

Austin Aries vs. Matt Hardy

Again, the winner doesn’t go to Ultimate X. They fight into the corner to start as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for here. Matt scores a quick takedown and poses before doing it again and shouting 2-0. Aries takes him down twice in a row, lays on the ropes and says we’re tied. They hit the mat with a headlock into a headscissors counter and it’s already a standoff. Another mat sequence ends with Aries hitting a basement dropkick and a slingshot hilo for two.

The announcers ignore the match again but at least they talk about the main event. Well to be fair they make a bet on the main event but close enough. Aries dropkicks Matt out to the floor but his suicide dive hits a forearm. Matt fights back with a middle rope elbow to the back of the head but the Side Effect is blocked with an elbow to the head. The double underhook guillotine has Aries in trouble but he escapes and puts on the Last Chancery.

They fight over a suplex on the apron (of course the Last Chancery didn’t work. It hasn’t in years) and Matt is shoved to the floor for the suicide dive. Aries dives into a kick into the ribs though and eats a Twist of Fate on the floor. Austin barely beats the count back in and quickly drops Hardy, only to miss the 450. Matt misses the moonsault though and they slug it out from their knees. The Side Effect gets two for Matt but Aries pops up with a pair of discus forearms, the running corner dropkick and the brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: B. Match of the night here by about a million miles but it’s nothing worth going out of your way to see. This sounded like something that should be headlining an indy show and there’s nothing wrong with it being the second biggest main event on a nothing show like this. To be fair, a big indy show probably has a better card than a lot of One Night Only shows.

Video on Ultimate X.

Kenny King vs. Tigre Uno vs. Rockstar Spud vs. DJZ vs. Crazzy Steve vs. Manik

Ultimate X for $100,000. Yeah not a title shot or anything, but money. It’s a big brawl to start with Manik making the first failed attempt at the X. A limping Spud is down on the floor as Steve bites DJZ’s head and hits him with a Cannonball in the corner. Tigre stops King from getting the X but gets pulled down by Manik. King superplexes Steve down and hammers away before everyone is down for a bit.

Spud pulls DJZ down and other combinations do the same thing as this is already starting to drag. We hit the parade of dives with Spud going last. It’s clear that they’re just killing time at this point, likely due to the Wolves match going short. They get back in (including Steve, who Josh keeps calling Steve of Crazy) for a Tower of Doom and the fans are barely reacting. King shoves DJZ through part of the structure before pulling Spud off the cables.

Tigre hits a Phoenix Splash to the floor onto DJZ for no apparent reason. King and Manik screw up an alliance and END THIS ALREADY! King is the only one left standing so he pulls out a ladder. Spud makes his comeback and hammers away on King but Kenny hits him with the ladder. The slowest climb of all time allows Spud to make the save and….have to deal with Manik who springboards onto the ladder. Thankfully it quickly falls over and Spud hangs on, pulling down the X to win.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here with nearly 18 minutes to this thing. The guys were trying hard but this shouldn’t be more than about ten minutes at most. The lack of drama really hurt it too as the only two possible winners were King and Spud, and there was barely a single dramatic attempt at the X. Just too long here and it really dragged things down.

Overall Rating: D. Oh yeah this was dull. It went on too long (which says a lot as this wasn’t even 2:45 long and it had about 15 minutes added with the Slammiversary match) and nothing here was worth seeing. In other words, it’s basically the exact same thing that has plagued every One Night Only show, including the dreadful commentary. Matthews and Borash clearly didn’t care and they knew they wouldn’t get in trouble for it because no one watches these shows. Bad show, but the guys were indeed trying.

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Impact Wrestling – May 1, 2015: Show Me The Crazy

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 1, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Al Snow

This is another special episode with Hardcore Justice, which was a One Night Only special in early April. Hopefully this is a bit of a better card as that show was just a step above a nightmare. Kurt Angle is scheduled to defend the World Title against Eric Young, but that was the case last week as well. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about making things hardcore tonight.

Davey Richards/Hardys vs. Revolution

Street fight with Khoya/Manik/Abyss here and the fight starts in the aisle before we have time for entrances. Davey hits a nice delayed vertical suplex on Manik but Khoya is laying waste to Jeff on the floor with a trashcan lid. Poetry in Motion hits Manik and Abyss takes one as well but with a chair as a bonus. A Twist of Fate looks to set up the Swanton on Abyss but Manik makes a save. Khoya muscles Jeff off the top for a slam and pounds away as this is still all over the place. Matt cleans house with a chair and some trashcan shots until Manik takes him down with another trashcan.

Back in and a big Tower of Doom leaves only Abyss standing but Davey flips out of a chokeslam attempt and nails Creeping Death to send Abyss outside. Khoya joins his partner and gets taken down by Davey’s suicide dive. Jeff dives as well, leaving Matt to hit the Side Effect on Manik. Davey hits a top rope double stomp for two but Abyss makes the save with a chokeslam. We get Abyss’ old crotching himself on a chair spot, setting up the Twist and Swanton for the pin for Jeff at 9:43.

Rating: C+. Well that was fun. There’s no sarcasm there as these guys kept it moving for nearly ten minutes and just beat each other up. The built in story of the Revolution destroying Eddie Edwards and Jeff gave the match a purpose and the brawling held up. Good opener here.

James Storm comes out and tells Abyss that he’s failed once too often.

Mr. Anderson liked interrupting EC3 last week and has a campaign sign of his own for tonight.

Package on Billy Corgan coming to TNA. This could be good, but it could also be a disaster.

Here’s Mr. Anderson wearing a tie and behind a podium. He doesn’t care about campaign promises, but he does want to see Ethan Carter III getting a whipping. This brings out Carter with Tyrus holding a campaign sign. Fans: “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE!” Anderson: “They think you can’t wrestle.”

Anderson says that if Carter wants the title, then he needs to come take it. Carter mentions being undefeated and that gets Anderson to his point. He unveils his own sign, which says Mr. Anderson to beat the streak. That sounds like a step beneath conquering but close enough. Anderson wants a match on the live show May 8 (first mention of the match being live) but thinks we should let the fans vote. The match is on without any voting but Carter warns Anderson to tread lightly. This election gimmick is money.

X-Division Title: Kenny King vs. Mandrews vs. Tigre Uno vs. Rockstar Spud

Spud, who has injured ribs coming in, is defending in this ladder match. Everyone busts out the dives to start with Mandrews topping them all with a huge shooting star press to take out King and Uno. King makes a quick save as Spud is still down on the floor. Tigre catapults the ladder into Mandrews and King, only to have Spud shove the ladder over for the save. King nails Spud in the bad ribs but walks into a tornado DDT off the ladder. Tigre plants Mandrews with a kind of reverse Samoan drop, only to have Spud shoves him off the top.

King goes back to the bad ribs with a hard ladder shot to the bandages until Mandrews knocks Kenny to the floor. It’s Uno with the save this time as he takes Mandrews down with a C4 off the ladder. Spud wins a slugout with King but Kenny kicks him in the bad ribs. Tigre springs onto the ladder but get slammed down. The distraction lets Spud get back up, remove the bowtie, and bite King’s face. A big right hand knocks King down but Homicide breaks it up, sending the bad ribs down onto another ladder. King gets up and wins the title at 7:54.

Rating: C. What happened to this division? It used to be one of the highlights of the company but I can’t remember the last time there was a story that didn’t involve Option C and Destination X. It’s a title match, a few random matches, then a big multi-man mess with four to seven guys fighting for the belt and maybe one personality between them. Yeah the spots are cool, but I’d love to see someone actually make the division mean something again, even for a little bit.

Quick recap of Angle vs. Young.

We get to the voting for Carter vs. Anderson next week: you can vote for arm wrestling or a falls count anywhere match. The voting idea is cool, but does TNA have an app? You’re not a real wrestling company if you don’t have an app. And if TNA does have one, HOW MANY TIMES HAS IT BEEN DOWNLOADED??? THIS IS VITAL INFORMATION TO MY ABILITY TO BE A WRESTLING FAN!

Here’s Eric Young with a stretcher. Angle has wanted to see the real Eric Young, but the real version of him has been the one that has put everyone on a stretcher just like this. Tonight he has Kurt Angle in a non-title match, but that’s what Young wants. That means he can hurt Angle all he wants and put him out forever. See, Young is crazy because he has big eyes. You know who else has big eyes and is basically the exact same character as Young, but with a lot more energy and presence.

The Beat Down Clan is ready to take Drew Galloway down in the pipe on a pole match.

Rockstar Spud feels like he’s been robbed because his name was on a list with Jerry Lynn and AJ Styles. He’ll get his title back. Spud showed good emotion here and he’s growing on me more every time I see him.

Dollhouse promo with Taryn acting all psycho. She’s not worried about Brooke because it’s playtime. This is their house. The Dollhouse.

Knockouts Title: Brooke vs. Taryn Terrell

Taryn is defending but Brooke knocks her into the corner and out to the floor to start. Back in and some neckbreakers get two for Brooke but Jade trips her up, allowing Taryn to take over. She rubs Brooke’s face into the mat, starting a discussion of what the mat feels like. It’s not really funny, but at least it’s not Tazz and Tenay chattering.

A standing Curb Stomp looks to set up a high cross body from the champ but Brooke half dodges half falls out of the way. She nails a middle rope X-Factor but the Dollhouse pulls Taryn outside. That’s fine with Brooke who dives on all of them with a nice plancha. Back in and Marti offers a distraction, allowing Jade to shove Brooke off the top. Taryn’s cutter retains the title at 7:18.

Rating: C. Not bad here but there was no doubt about who was going to win here. They’re setting up a cool idea here with the Dollhouse being unbeatable and saying no one can beat her. That sounds like the calling card for one more match from Mickie James, who might just win the title and have one more run to further the wedge between her and Magnus?

The Dollhouse celebrates but Gail Kim comes out. Taryn points out that it’s three on one but Kong comes out to help even things up. The Dollhouse isn’t so sure now.

Slammiversary will be on pay per view on June 28.

Video on the Rising.

Low Ki vs. Drew Galloway

Pipe on a pole match, the second one I’ve seen Drew in in three days. Galloway has bad ribs coming in. They quickly head outside with the fans holding Low Ki for chops from Drew. Chair shots are exchanged with Drew getting the better of it but not being able to get the pipe. Drew can’t hit a powerbomb onto the chair so Ki fires off kicks to the ribs. It’s not enough to get the pipe down, but Ki kicks Drew onto the chair and hits a Warrior’s Way to drive the ribs into the steel.

That’s only good for two of course, but suddenly Ki remembers the pipe. Drew pops up to his feet and slugs it out on the top with the pipe falling to the floor. Ki knocks him into the Tree of Woe but misses another Warrior’s Way, allowing Drew to get the pipe. A shot to the ribs gets two on Galloway but he hits a quick Future Shock onto the chair (which doesn’t hurt his ribs whatsoever) for the pin at 7:25.

Rating: D+. Other than the story, there was zero need for this to be a pipe match and the pipe didn’t even play into the finish. It’s basically the same problem that killed the other pipe on a pole match, but at least they used the pipe here. I’m still not seeing the point of this feud, but this match didn’t help things.

The BDC and the Rising come out for a big brawl.

We recap Storm talking Mickie James out of her retirement last week.

Mickie James was filmed earlier today when James Storm came up to her at the market. Thankfully they were both mic’d up when Storm asked to hold Mickie and Magnus’ son.

Magnus is in the ring but Storm cuts him off before he can say anything. Storm says he wasn’t the one that said Mickie should have one more match but Magnus is getting annoyed. Mickie isn’t one of the Revolution lost souls and Storm can’t manipulate her. Storm smiles and says it was Magnus who hired a camera crew. He implies that he and Mickie used to be a thing and wonders why Mickie didn’t tell him about running into Storm in the parking lot. Good night how much better is Storm as the devil’s advocate instead of leading the horrible Revolution?

Angle says tonight is about violence and Young is leaving on a stretcher.

Eric Young vs. Kurt Angle

Non-title stretcher match but you win by strapping your opponent to a stretcher, meaning no line to cross. Angle has a bruised knee and chest coming in. They trade stomps to start with Young throwing Kurt to the floor. Both guys are rammed into the steps with Angle getting the better of it, only to get sent hard into the post as we take a break. Back with Angle reversing a whip but getting punched in the jaw. A release belly to belly puts Young down but Eric sends him outside. Young stomps him onto the steps to put Angle down, allowing him to finally get the stretcher.

Angle can’t hit the German off the apron but he can roll the Germans back inside. The third one causes a turnbuckle pad to be ripped off but they fall to the floor with Kurt still holding the grip. A low blow with Young’s shin guard slows Kurt down but the piledriver is countered into a catapult into the post. Angle hits the Slam on the floor but can’t strap Young onto the stretcher. The piledriver is countered into the ankle lock but Eric rolls him into the buckle. Now a pair of piledrivers connect and Young straps him to the stretcher for the win at 15:21.

Rating: C. And my eyes roll again. There’s no crazy, there’s no reason to believe Young is winning the title in the likely title match next week, there’s no reason for Young to have this spot over his English counterpart and there’s no reason to believe we’re not getting Carter vs. Angle in the actually interesting feud. I can’t stand this story as it’s just killing time until we get to the feud people actually want to see. Again, if Young actually acted crazy, I might care a little bit, but his matches are just standard heel matches with a piledriver as a finisher. It gets old hearing HE’S CRAZY when there’s no actual evidence of him being crazy.

Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t do it for me as the hardcore stuff didn’t change much. I like a lot of the places they’re going and next week has potential to be interesting, but they MUST get past this Young main event run as he’s just not in Angle’s league. Storm vs. Magnus, Gail/Kong vs. the Dollhouse and Galloway vs. the BDC are all good though and I could go for Spud fighting to get his title back as well. It’s a passable show, but the hardcore stuff didn’t add much.

Results

Hardys/Davey Richards b. Revolution – Swanton Bomb to Abyss

Kenny King b. Rockstar Spud, Tigre Uno and Mandrews – King pulled down the title

Taryn Terrell b. Brooke – Cutter

Drew Galloway b. Low Ki – Future Shock on a chair

Eric Young b. Kurt Angle – Young strapped Angle to a chair

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1998 Pay Per View reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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