Monday Nitro #49
Date: August 19, 1996
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Attendance: 5,850
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan, Eric Bischoff, Tony Schiavone

 

We’re a week away from #4 being revealed in the NWO. We’re also closing in on Fall Brawl and the beginning of the biggest and most lucrative storyline that WCW ever came up with. The time getting there is a bit slow but it’ll pick up in a hurry. The main event here is Giant vs. Savage which isn’t for the title anymore. Other than that there isn’t much here but it doesn’t look bad. Let’s get to it.

 

Jim Duggan vs. VK Wallstreet

 

This is a rematch from the Clash. Why we would want to see it again is beyond me but I doubt they’ve thought it that far through. Duggan tried for the tape but got rolled up for the upset (I guess) pin. They go to the floor almost immediately and Duggan takes over in the brawling environment. Back in for an atomic drop and now it’s back over again. Time to talk about the NWO! Ok to be fair I’d rather talk about that than this match.

 

Larry brings up the possibility that those guys might not be trustworthy and Tony says he thinks there’s one person more trustworthy than anyone else. I’ll leave the identity of this person a secret because he would join the NWO in two weeks. Off to a chinlock by Wallstreet as Tony talks about how intelligent Duggan is. Larry: “Are you ribbing me?” I’m with Larry Z here.

 

More chinlockery ensues as we hear about Duggan’s track record. That would include beating Steve Austin clean in 45 seconds for you non-history geeks. They collide and I’d bet on Duggan’s comeback starting now. Yep his head becomes impossible to hurt now and Duggan pounds away. There’s the tape and it’s declared foreign. But Duggan would never use something foreign! The referee takes it away from him so Duggan pulls out some more and the referee says it’s totally cool when it goes upside Wallstreet’s head for the pin.

 

Rating: D. I really am wondering why this match was taking place. I get that it’s a rematch but why did the original one take place at all? I mean, was there some clamor for these two to have a two match feud? The match was garbage too with Wallstreet being about five years past being interesting in the ring. Also the Vince parody (VK. Get it?) was only funny if you were really inside things and most fans weren’t, making it, say it with me, POINTLESS.

 

Duggan goes serious and talks to “Terry”, saying he turned his back on everyone. Here comes Savage for some reason. He says he’s going to beat up Hogan and now it’s a Savage interview. We look at some video of Hogan beating Savage with a chair last week. As for Giant, he’s got a problem with him which I think is they’re fighting. Can’t say Savage is looking ahead to Hogan entirely.

 

We talk about Giant being unstoppable lately and get some clips of him mauling Benoit in like 8 seconds at the last Clash.

 

Chris Benoit vs. Bobby Eaton

 

Eaton is a hometown boy but he’s in the Blue Blood period here. He’s on his own though as the Blue Bloods are having issues. As Benoit is making his entrance, this old lady has the biggest grin on her face and gives him two thumbs down. That’s awesome. This should be good as Eaton is a fine technical guy. Benoit beats him down and grabs a brief abdominal stretch.

 

Eaton takes it to the mat and can keep up with Chris out there for a bit. Benoit isn’t playing tonight though (when is he ever?) and sends Eaton into the post and hip tosses him on the floor. Back in and Eaton tags him with a right. We talk about WarGames which is a big deal every year. Benoit chokes away and Eaton does the same. I’m not used to him brawling like this. A swinging neckbreaker puts Benoit down but the Alabama Jam misses. Swan Dive and we’re done.

 

Rating: C+. Pretty good match here and Benoit gets to look dominant. This is what Eaton or guys like him are good at: making young guys look good. Jobbers to the stars are missing so badly anymore as they’re so rapidly rotated and then new ones have to be pushed to give them some credibility and it takes forever to get one into that role.

 

We get some clips from the triangle tag match last Thursday where the Outsiders interfered and we got a DQ in a triple threat thanks to Nick Patrick. We also see the main event where Hogan might have said he gave up but he took out the referee before it could be recorded and the match was thrown out.

 

Sting/Luger talk about their match with Flair/Anderson later which wouldn’t happen. They have a plan tonight and a possible surprise. Sting can’t stand either of them and promises a surprise also but doesn’t say what it is.

 

Disco Inferno vs. Scott Norton

 

Disco fires away and turns his back on Norton and I think you know where this goes. Disco tries to run but Norton, just like any villain, walks really slowly and manages to catch him. How does that work anyway? We’ve been at this for about two minutes now and Norton has barely done anything. Disco goes for the eyes which works for about a second. Shoulderbreaker and a Fujiwara Armbar end this.

 

Rating: C. It’s a squash so I’ll call it right in the middle. Norton looked awesome but would be in the NWO before a few months passed. This was supposed to set up more Norton vs. Ice Train which was a feud that went on too long. I don’t know if it ever got a rematch from Hog Wild and I really don’t care to. Hog Wild’s match wasn’t horrible though.

 

Teddy Long talks for Ice Train and accuses Patrick of costing Train the match. We get a clip of Norton beating up Ice Train. Oh my goodness Ice Train cannot talk. I mean he REALLY can’t talk.

 

Dean Malenko vs. Steven Regal

 

This should be good. We go to the mat immediately which is usually good for Dean but here he’s actually outmatched. We take a break and come back with the guys again exchanging nice moves with no one getting a solid advantage. Regal cartwheels away and takes Malenko down with a shot to the head for two. Off to a modified chinlock which only lasts for a few seconds.

 

Malenko gets a hip toss for two. A hip toss? Really? European Uppercut gets two for Regal. Now we talk about Patrick being corrupt which Larry dismisses as paranoia. Regal grabs a full nelson as Larry offers some actual analysis. Why can’t more veterans do that? Dean goes aerial and hits a springboard dropkick to the back of the head and the American hits a German to the Englishman and there’s a second for two. Regal grabs a butterfly suplex for two. He can’t pin Malenko and it’s making him mad. After a very nice back and forth pinning reversal sequence Malenko grabs a rollup for the pin.

 

Rating: B. If you want fast paced technical stuff, this was the match you should have gone after. Good stuff here from two masters on the mat with a great ending sequence. They only rested when they had gone a good pace before it so I can more than live with that. It’s a rare instance where I wanted to see what happened during the break. Good match as expected with good talent in the ring.

 

The Horsemen rant and rave about how awesome they are and how great the Horsemen life is.

 

Hour #2 begins.

 

Nasty Boys vs. Public Enemy

 

Eric talks about how there’s a lawsuit from the WWF. A total of no one cares but hey, it’s real so that means everyone wants to hear it in Bischoff’s mind. The same old woman from the Benoit match boos the Public Enemy. It’s a brawl to start and probably will be for most of the match. We go split screen quickly and Bobby points out this isn’t really a tag match. Knobbs drops an elbow on Grunge for two. Grunge misses one of his own off the apron. There’s nothing to talk about here as it’s been a big brawl the entire time. A table is set up but Sags moves, putting both Enemies through it. The pin on Rock is academic.

 

Rating: C+. As a match it was awful. As a total brawl, which was the point of this, it was pretty decent. The ending was a big spot for the time and it looked good at the same time. The tables then were a bit thicker so it sounded a lot better. The Public Enemy would get the tag titles for like two weeks later in the year.

 

The Nasties are neutral in the NWO vs. WCW war and just want the tag titles.

 

We get another clip from the Clash with Eddie beating DDP for the Battlebowl Ring but Page pulled him into a pair of Diamond Cutters. Chavo came out for the save on his uncle which failed, resulting in a middle rope Diamond Cutter on Eddie.

 

Chavo Guerrero vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

Chavo is only known as Eddie’s nephew here and doesn’t have much of a resume of his own. He sends Page to the floor and hits a huge dive to open us up. Page is sent into the corner a few times but Chavo misses a charge, hitting the post shoulder first. He hit the buckle on the way in so the impact was slowed down. Page uses his size which is often forgotten about. He’s 6’5 or 6’6 so it really is an advantage.

 

We talk about Savage vs. Giant which is happening because Savage blames Giant for losing the title. WHEN DID HE SAY THAT??? This is the kind of thing we need to be told by Savage, not Bischoff. Page is dominating here and hits that sweet gutwrench powerbomb but lets it up at two. Spinning Rock Bottom gets two as Page lets him up again. Out of NOWHERE Chavo grabs a backslide for the quick pin.

 

Rating: C+. Chavo was a lot better when he was young and he got to show off a bit here. Page was getting better every day at this point and looked good here. The push was coming soon and it was clear at this point that he was earning it. The Page vs. Guerreros feud would culminate at the end of the year but it was fun getting there.

 

Page knocks Chavo loopy with a Diamond Cutter and steals Patrick’s belt to whip Chavo. Patrick doesn’t do anything until Randy Anderson comes out and takes it from Page. In the aisle Patrick blames Gene for the issues around him. Gene implies that Patrick bought a house he can’t afford.

 

We flash back a year ago with the American Males winning the tag titles in a shocker over Harlem Heat. Eric says this is the rematch. I guess the Males losing the belts back a few days later didn’t count?

 

Tag Titles: Harlem Heat vs. American Males

 

The Males (the team, not the gender even though that could apply to either team) get jumped to start and the champs have the early advantage. Both of the Males (Bagwell and Riggs) are beaten down quickly as I’m not expecting much competition in this one. Ray hits a suplex on Riggs and it’s off to Booker. Riggs fires off a dropkick to give himself a breather and down goes Booker.

 

There’s a double tag and Bagwell kicks Booker in the head as he jumps in. That looked good. He escapes a pumphandle slam into a cover but Booker saves. A rollup gets two and they go outside to brawl. Riggs hits a dropkick for two and Bagwell goes up. Booker shoves him off into a powerslam by Ray though and that’s good for three.

 

Rating: C+. Another fast paced match here with Eric losing his mind over this for some reason. I think it’s probably a stretch for the eleven month rematch idea but they needed something I guess to keep the match from being a squash so this was a pretty good idea if they had to go with this match. Much better than I expected here.

 

Arn Anderson/Ric Flair vs. Sting/Lex Luger

 

Sting has a mic immediately and wants to have the other Horsemen come into the ring. Mongo and Benoit come out and we take a break. So is Sting just going to wait around for five minutes? Gene comes out sans jacket and Sting’s surprise from earlier is he wants Anderson and Flair to join him and Luger against the NWO in WarGames. That takes a few minutes to ask. Arn warns Luger and Sting that this is something serious and that jiggling pecs have nothing to do with WarGames. Weren’t they on the same WarGames team at one point?

 

The match isn’t happening as we’re going to talk a little while longer. You can’t argue that this is a big move though. Everyone talks to everyone and it really is getting close to an awesome moment. Flair says it’s up to Mongo and Benoit. If they’re cool with it, Flair is cool with it. Benoit says he’ll stand behind Anderson and Flair’s decision. Nice touch there for the young Horsemen to stand behind the veterans. Mongo (loudly booed) says he’s willing to sacrifice but if Sting and Luger screw over the Horsemen, he’ll be coming for them. The deal is made. This really was a cool moment.

 

The NWO talk about being in “Italy” and film themselves filming each other. Nash: “Why is the Denver Post in Italy?” Funny stuff.

 

The Giant vs. Randy Savage

 

Savage jumps Giant in the aisle with a chair. Giant easily beats him down on the floor and Team WCW vs. Team NWO is official for Fall Brawl. After Giant throws him over the top rope the bell actually rings. Savage escapes the chokeslam and grabs the chair but has to fight off the invading Dungeon of Doom as this match is thrown out. Savage runs from the numbers but Giant jumps over the top to the floor. Giant is Big Show. Imagine Big Show jumping over the top rope to the floor.

 

Overall Rating: A-. I can’t believe what I’m saying but this was a very good and borderline excellent show. Everybody had energy, there was a point to almost everything, we got a big moment in the Horsemen teaming with Sting/Luger, the matches were good and there were some cool spots. THIS is what made Nitro look so much better than Raw: everything was fast paced and exciting and the wrestling got better and better, especially when they got some of their new faces in there like Jericho and Raven. Very good show and one of the best ever of the first 50.

 

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Thunder
Date: March 26, 1998
Location: Patriot Center, Fairfax, Virginia
Commentators: Lee Marshall, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re getting closer to Spring Stampede and most of the card is pretty clear. That being said, the picture we’re getting isn’t all that pretty. The bat match announced on Monday is nothing special and it’s going to overshadow Sting vs. Savage which has the potential to be decent. The interesting question for tonight is will we get any followup on Goldberg’s attack on the NWO last week. Let’s get to it.

Here are Eddie Guerrero and Chavo Guerrero Jr. to open the show. Chavo has to scratch Eddie’s back on the way to the ring. Eddie says Chavo has a TV Title shot tonight, but he hasn’t proven himself yet. Therefore, Eddie will be taking the title shot and Chavo gets this match.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit immediately chops Chavo down to start and stomps him into the corner. We cut up the commentary desk where Rick Rude and Eric Bischoff take over. Now we go back to the ring with Chavo still chopping away. Some backbreakers put Chavo down as Bischoff compares WCW to Kenneth Starr, because wrestling fans want to hear about current political events when they watch wrestling. Chavo comes back with some shots to the ribs and a dropkick gets no cover. Benoit comes back with a knee to Chavo’s ribs and drapes Chavo over the top rope. Chavo sunsets flips him for two but walks into the Crossface for the submission.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but Benoit’s yo-yo push continues. He goes from a US Title shot to jobbing to Norton to drawing with Booker T to being a bishop (he’s too good to be a pawn) in the Guerrero feud. It’s almost like WCW isn’t paying attention to what they do with him and just throw him out there at random.

Here are Hogan and Bischoff in the ring. Bischoff complains about WCW having people like Piper out here to cause trouble and says it’s easy to understand why Hogan has so many disciples. Hogan insists that there are no rifts in the NWO despite any footage WCW may show. He and Nash are best friends for life and WCW is just putting them in matches in hopes that they’ll argue. They’ll win at the PPV, just like they did on Monday.

This brings out Nash who says that he knows someone is pulling the NWO’s strings but no one pulls his. Hogan may claim to lead the NWO but everyone knows the heart and soul of the NWO is the Wolfpack. If Hogan is in charge, why is Syxx out of a job and why is Hall never on live TV? Hogan says Syxx couldn’t cut the mustard but doesn’t know where Hall is. Hogan: “I thought you knew.” Hollywood blames Savage for the problems and says they can deal with them at the PPV. He would partner with Nash anytime but Nash says it would be his honor brother, which confuses Eric and Hogan.

La Parka vs. Prince Iaukea

No entrance for either guy for the sake of time. La Parka does his dance to start before charging into a boot in the corner. A spinwheel kick staggers Iaukea but he sends La Parka to the floor for a flip dive off the apron. Back in and an elbow to the face gets two on the Prince but he grabs a northern lights suplex for a pn on La Parka out of nowhere. This was nothing.

Here’s Lex Luger to say that he and Sting will accept Hogan and Nash’s open challenge for a tag match tonight. I didn’t exactly hear an open challenge but whatever gets us to tonight’s run-in palooza is fine.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Jericho vs. Disco Inferno

The crowd LOUDLY tells Jericho that he sucks on the way to the ring. They trade headlocks to start until Disco takes him down with a clothesline. Disco stomps him down in the corner and hits a middle rope fist to the head for two. Jericho takes him down and kicks Disco in the ribs before getting two off a suplex. Disco runs into a boot in the corner but comes back with an atomic drop and a neckbreaker for two each. That’s it for Disco though as he gets caught in a butterfly backbreaker and the Liontamer retains the title. Short and not much to this one.

Jericho takes Disco’s headband for the trophy case.

Goldberg vs. Jerry Flynn

Tony does the ads for future shows and actually uses the term house shows. Goldberg asked for this match after Flynn gave him a test. Flynn fires off his kicks and takes Goldberg to the mat, only to be caught in a leg bar. A powerslam puts Jerry down but he grabs an armbar. Goldberg will have none of that and powerbombs him down before breaking out of a choke. They trade a few more holds and Flynn actually scores with some kicks. I don’t even get done typing that line before the spear and Jackhammer make Goldie 62-0.

Kidman vs. Psychosis

Psychosis is now a face apparently. This is a revenge match as Lodi was injured in his match on Monday so Kidman is out to hurt Psychosis in turn. Kidman jumps him from behind and sends Psychosis into the ropes for a very slow motion Tajiri handspring elbow minus the handspring or the elbow. Instead he rolled and hit the middle rope and didn’t do any elbowing but it’s the best I’ve got. Psychosis goes up top but gets shoved to the floor for a big dive from Kidman.

Back in and Kidman gets two off a sitout spinebuster before putting on a chinlock with a knee in the back. Psychosis counters a powerbomb and gets two off a clothesline but charges into an elbow in the corner. Kidman is dropkicked into the ropes and Psychosis gets two off the guillotine legdrop with Kidman still in the ropes. Psychosis gets crotched on the top and superplexed down for no cover. Instead here’s Sick Boy to miss a springboard dropkick and hit Kidman by mistake, allowing Psychosis to hit the full guillotine legdrop for the pin.

Rating: C-. Psychosis getting a little push is nice to see, but he was sloppy here. That’s odd to see as he was usually one of the better fliers in the company. Kidman was getting better every time he was out there but he still had a way to go. Also it’s nice to see some continuing stories in the lower card which is usually one random match after another. Decent stuff here too.

Here’s DDP to say he doesn’t want WCW’s help in getting the US Title back. He talks about being trained by Jake Roberts and is sick of Raven’s whining. Page is going to bang him soon.

British Bulldog/Jim Neidhart vs. Curt Hennig/Bryan Adams

It’s a brawl to start as Rude takes over on commentary from Marshall. We start with Smith vs. Adams as Davey ducks a big boot and trips Adams down for two. Off to Neidhart for some lame arm work and a slam before Hennig comes in with some shots to the back. A big shoulder runs Hennig over and it’s back to Davey who has to chase Hennig around the ring, allowing Bryan to get in a cheap shot.

Adams comes in legally and gets in some shots but Bulldog easily tags Neidhart back in. This is really dull so far. Neidhart is sent into the NWO corner and pounded down before walking into an Adams piledriver for two. A double clothesline gets two on Jim but he gets to his corner for the tag to Bulldog who cleans part of a house. Everything breaks down and they all go to the floor, brawling until the match juts ends in I think a double DQ.

Rating: D-. I know I said Benoit seemed to have no direction but it’s even truer with Bulldog and Smith. They’ve been thrown out there and are kind of fighting on Bret’s behalf against Hennig but they can’t be associated with him, meaning they can’t talk about him. The matches are really dull too, making these segments low points for the shows.

US Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Saturn

The war continues as Page still doesn’t have the belt itself. Saturn jumps Page as he comes in but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. A rollup gets the same for the champion but he walks into a t-bone suplex for two. Saturn hooks an abdominal stretch to work on Page’s bad ribs but Page quickly hip tosses out of it.

Now Page puts on an abdominal stretch of his own but Saturn counters into a northern lights suplex for two. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about the NWO. Page fights up and hits a quick belly to belly for two. Saturn hits a quick jawbreaker but gets crotched on top. Cue Raven with the belt on the stage so Page catches a diving Saturn in the Diamond Cutter and goes after Raven for the countout.

Rating: C+. The match didn’t last long but the Diamond Cutter at the end looked great. Saturn is very well rounded in the ring and there was a nice story going on with him being able to counter everything Page had but DDP having one big move to knock Saturn out. The lack of time hurt this one badly.

TV Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Booker T

Before the bell, Booker asks Chavo why he’s giving up a title shot so easily. Eddie answers for his nephew and says this is family business. Booker says he’ll show Chavo how to deal with a bully but Eddie has some brass knuckles on his hand. He lays out Booker as the bell rings but only gets two. Chavo takes the knuckles off Eddie’s hand and throws them to him, drawing a quick DQ.

Eddie makes Chavo hit Booker with the knuckles and the stomping begins but Benoit comes out for the save. Tag match coming up it seems.

Rick Steiner vs. Scott Norton

A Buff distraction lets Norton get in a cheap shot for early control. Scott shoves him into the corner but walks into a belly to belly, allowing Rick to go after the leg. Back up and Norton no sells an elbow to the face before taking Steiner down. He stomps away but Rick bites his leg, only earning himself more stomping. Buff gets in some choking of his own but gets glared down by DiBiase.

Norton ducks his head and gets kicked in the face, allowing Rick to hit another belly to belly. A clothesline puts Norton on the floor but here’s Scott Steiner with a dog collar. They screw up the ending as Norton misses a shot with the collar and Rick picks it up. He swings but stops halfway through, allowing Norton to try a belly to back suplex. Now the collar to the head is enough to pin Norton.

Rating: D. Another boring match but at least Norton lost for a change. The ending here looked terrible as the referee was obviously looking at what was going on in addition to the bad timing of the collar shot. This was nothing to see, which is a running theme on tonight’s show.

Lex Luger/Sting vs. Hollywood Hogan/Kevin Nash

Nash is in street clothes. Hogan and Sting get things going with the champion knocking Hollywood down with ease. Sting shoves him down and flexes a bit so Hogan takes the bandana off. The champion blocks a ram into the buckle and pounds away in the corner. Off to Luger who gets caught by a thumb to the eye, allowing for the tag to Nash. Kevin runs Luger over and it’s back to Hogan for some choking. Hogan holds Luger for Nash but Lex avoids the big boot which hits Hogan instead. There’s the hot tag to Sting as everything breaks down. Nash takes the Stinger Splash but Savage runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D. Yep it was about three minutes long and ended in a run-in. As usual, this was all about the NWO with the world champion and Luger just filling in spots. Sting’s momentum is completely gone just a few months after he was the biggest star in WCW. But hey, at least we’re getting MORE Hogan right?

Post match Savage goes after Sting but Hogan goes after Savage for no apparent reason. Nash pulls Hogan off of Savage so they have a staredown but the rest of the NWO comes in for the big brawl. Sting and Luger manage to fight them off with relative ease and Hogan argues with Nash to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There’s some decent wrestling in there but most of the matches were too short to mean anything. The main event sucked and was angle advancement, which is ok some of the time but when that’s all the main events are anymore it’s hard to care. Somehow this was a big improvement over last week’s show. At least there was some star power this week.

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Hard Justice 2009
Date: August 16, 2009
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 1,100
Commentators: Don West, Mike Tenay

We continue our backwards trip through TNA as I keep trying to get closer and closer to being done with their PPVs. This is one of three remaining 2009 shows I have so it’s as good a place as any. Anyway the Mafia is still around and the main event (haha) is Angle vs. Sting vs. Morgan for the title. There really isn’t much else as the card is rather lackluster. Then again this isn’t one of TNA’s biggest PPVs. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about Morgan for the most part, and how he’s perfect or something. His DNA was sent into space which is rather cool. They don’t talk about anything else here so you can tell it’s a weak card.

Chris Sabin vs. Alex Shelley vs. Amazing Red vs. Daniels vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequence Creed vs. Suicide vs. D’Angelo Dinero

The Guns don’t have their signature music yet. This is the steel asylum, as in the big red cage, and you win by escape. Naturally there are WAY too many people in it so you won’t be able to call a thing in it. Winner gets an X Title shot at No Surrender. This is Pope’s debut. There’s a big hole at the top and you have to climb up to escape, which is hard because the roof curves up.

The fans are behind Pope it seems. Suicide makes a run at it but Creed pulls him down. The Guns beat up Daniels because that’s what they do. The camera has to keep cutting away from the match and various spots because they have to go to other spots. Lethal Consequences takes Red down and the Guns get a dropkick Conchairto to the head of Pope. This is really a collection of spots and not a match.

Daniels takes Lethal off the top and tries a climb, only to be stopped by Dinero. And never mind as Daniels punches the cage and probably breaks his hand. We’re at the point now where most people lay around and wait on two people to do something before getting in there again. The Guns and Lethal Consequences have a mini match with the Guns getting the better of it.

Daniels and Pope keep slugging it out on the top and there’s your Tower of Doom spot. We get a complex four person submission hold with the tag teams again. Shelley hits Sliced Bread #2 on Daniels and here comes Red. He takes down just about everyone that was still on their feet/knees and goes up, only for Shelley to make the stop in the corner.

Seven people are standing in one corner or are on the rope in that corner. The eighth comes up because he’s (Sabin) very stupid. Gee, with everyone in one corner, I’m sure there’s nothing he could do in the other five corners right? Everyone gets taken down as Daniels and Red go up. Daniels hooks in a leg and is kind of hanging around. Suicide almost makes it but Pope stops him, only to be stuck in the corner. Daniels finally wakes up and climbs out to win it.

Rating: C+. Really hard to call here as the whole thing was a mess. There’s no flow to it but to be fair it’s supposed to be a big mess I think. You cut this down to four people and you have a FAR better match. That being said at 16 minutes it’s still way too long, but at the same time they were trying and hit the limit with what this match can do under these circumstances I think.

Daniels says the X-Division is awesome. He’ll get the X Title back and AJ needs to come back also.

We run down the card for the ADHD fans out there.

Morgan says he’s in the main event to win, not help Kurt.

We recap the WAY too long Dr. Stevie vs. Abyss feud. Stevie put out a $50,000 bounty on Abyss and it’s about maiming him. The maimer in this case: Jethro Holiday, more commonly known as Trevor Murdoch. Yes, really.

Abyss vs. Jethro Holiday

THIS warranted PPV times. Yes, really. Oh and it’s no DQ/weapons are legal/whatever. Holiday, ever the generic southern/country boy, chops away and gets absolutely nowhere. Abyss claps away like an idiot as we head to the floor. For the second time tonight someone punches something made of metal and Holiday takes over again. Middle rope elbow misses back in as this is already boring.

Abyss finally brings in a chair as Stevie slides in a metal stick or something to Holiday. It’s a baton I think. Abyss fights back with his big man offense like a big boot and backdrop. Let’s clap some more because that’s HARDCORE BABY! Side slam gets two. Holiday gets a chair to Abyss’ balls and a baton shot to the head gets two. More brawling ensues and a chokeslam gets two for Abyss. Holiday gets the Texas standard move in the form of a bulldog for two. Black Hole Slam ends this a second later.

Rating: D. This wasn’t horrible, but it’s Trevor Murdoch vs. Abyss on PPV. Why in the world did they think this was deserving of about 11 minutes total? Boring match for the most part and just kind of there, which is fine if it’s ok but it’s not in this case. Holiday would do nothing for the most part and would be gone in a few months.

Holiday takes down Stevie post match, I guess turning face.

Angle says he’ll keep the title. He might weigh 180lbs here.

Rob Terry vs. Hernandez

Terry stole Hernandez’s briefcase and Supermex wants it back. Hernandez says the Impact Zone is his house and it’s like Terry stole the case from his family. This is going to be a fight, not a match. The other Brits try to interfere, Hernandez runs them off, bell, shoulderblock, pin. Literally, 9 seconds of the actual match.

Beer Money says they’ll win the Japanese tag titles, because we NEED Japanese tag titles right?

World Elite is awesome apparently and Beer Money is standing in the way of their dominance despite them not really dominating anyone.

IWGP Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. British Invasion

It’s more Japanese tag titles because they’re Japanese so every non-WWE fan loves them right? The Brits have the belts here. Young jumps in on commentary here. The Brits are Magnus and Williams here. Storm and Magnus start us off as the fans chant wanker. Storm makes both Brits look like idiots to start and Roode launches Storm over the top to the floor onto both Brits.

Williams comes in and takes over on Roode, including the always awesome jumping back elbow. Everything breaks down again with Beer Money in control again. This is one of those rather boring matches where not a lot is going on here. We get one of the stupid face in crotch spots from the Brits. The champions take over with some basic leg work on Storm as this is rather boring.

The fans chant for the Cowboy so at least they have the right football team. See how far I have to go for jokes here? Do you see what I do for you people here? Williams drops a knee and Magnus gets two off of it. Weak tag to Roode who hits the Blockbuster for two. There’s the time waster by the challengers and a double team Rock Bottom gets two on Magnus. Young comes in for a distraction and Williams rolls up Roode for the pin to retain.

Rating: D-. The match itself wasn’t really that awful but it was incredibly boring. Not an interesting match in the slightest and that’s saying a lot when it comes to a team as talented as Beer Money. This went nowhere for the most part and the whole thing was just a boring waste of time. Not bad, but the lack of anything interesting killed it deader than Immortal’s current credibility.

Deaner and ODB aren’t funny.

Knockout Title: Velvet Sky/Angelina Love vs. Cody Deaner/ODB

Ok so Angelina is champion here and it’s a tag match with a guy fighting for the women’s title. Just go with it. Madison is with the blondes here. Angelina and ODB start us off here This is a rather basic match here and Angelina looks far better with fewer tattoos on her arm. Velvet comes in and do you really think it matters what goes on in this? Deaner comes in and spanks Velvet a bit.

Angelina comes in and gets a quick two on ODB. The heels take over as you would expect them to here. Velvet is rather red from the spanking. I didn’t need the image of Deaner doing that. Seated dropkick gets two for Angelina. Deaner comes back in and kisses both blondes. Make that all three of them as Madison takes some tongue apparently. The girls finally get it together and beat up Cody, only for him to avoid some hairspray from Madison and roll up Velvet for the pin and the title for ODB. Deaner would claim he was the real champion, because that’s how TNA rolls.

Rating: D. Yeah this was a mess. Velvet is hot as is Angelina, but ODB and Deaner were the focus here and I don’t see the need to have Deaner involved here at all. I think this led to Madison being tossed out of the team but that could have been done in a singles match also. Weak match and a stupid angle.

We waste more time as Velvet and Angelina leave Madison in the ring.

Taz talks for Joe, saying that Hernandez didn’t beat Joe because Joe beat Joe. Joe is going to win the X Title tonight and take it to the Mafia.

X–Division Title: Homicide vs. Samoa Joe

Joe has his face tattoo still here. The fans chant 187. Joe takes him down with strikes quickly but Homicide uses his technical abilities to take him to the floor. Homicide is considered a ring master but I’ve never really seen it. He’s not bad but I don’t see the genius aspect to him. After a pep talk from Joe it’s time to go back to work for Joe. This is a rather fast paced match which doesn’t really surprise me.

Rana is blocked to send Homicide to the floor and a suicide dive sends him flying. Back in and Joe drops a knee so he can crank on the neck a bit. Powerslam gets two. Homicide tries to fight back but Joe is just too fat. Powerbomb is turned into an STF and into a crossface and into the Rings of Saturn, all by Joe. Homicide finally gets his foot on the ropes to break it up but that was kind of impressive. I think. Actually it wasn’t but it fits the submission aspect of Joe’s character.

Joe hammers away as the fans chant 187 again. I know Impact Zone fans are considered a little slow but they can’t even count to ten properly? Homicide comes back with some clotheslines and gets Joe down. Top rope dropkick sends Joe to the floor and there’s a tope con hilo to take Joe down even more.

Homicide and Taz nearly get into it but that goes nowhere. Neckbreaker gets two back in the ring for the champion. Diamond Cutter gets two. Gringo Killer (Vertebreaker) is blocked and Joe can’t quite get the Clutch. Ok so never mind yes he can and Homicide taps almost immediately. Some guy from the toughest place in the world.

Rating: B-. Pretty good here as both guys worked rather well out there. They probably fought a few dozen times in the indies so it’s pretty clear they know each other as well as possible. Better Homicide match than I remember him having more often than not so that’s a nice surprise. Not bad here at all.

Kurt goes to talk to Matt Morgan and doesn’t even knock. Angle tries to make a deal and Morgan agrees that it’s either him or Angle leaving with the title tonight.

We recap the Mafia vs. Team 3D. The Mafia more or less stole the titles from Beer Money. Team 3D complained about getting screwed out of everything (Bubba: “If I knew getting screwed felt this bad, I would have stayed a virgin.”) and therefore wanted a match. Don’t ask me how all of the tag titles worked at this time. With the Japanese belts out there it’s more confusing than an Egyptian restaurant menu.

Tag Titles: Scott Steiner/Booker T vs. Team 3D

Falls count anywhere here and they have two referees which is rather smart for once. Sharmell looks good here. Apparently it’s No DQ also, therefore making it a hardcore match. In a Russo company? I’M SHOCKED!!! Big staredown to start and the brawl begins. The fans want tables within ten seconds. Booker gets double teamed and the Mafia complains a lot.

Booker and Steiner yell at Hebner, the outside referee, and it’s time to head into the crowd. We go split screen and it’s one of those annoying ones that has about 30% of the screen devoted to the match and the rest is a big freaking TNA logo. I’ve never gotten why they do that. Is that for people that have bought all the PPV offerings for that night and flip through the channels to decide what to watch?

The races pair off and it’s a big brawl as you would expect from these guys. There’s the required ECW chant. To be fair though, three of these guys were in the original ECW so it’s hard to complain. Steiner gets two on Bubba off of I think a weapon shot. They’ve more or less dropped the split screen at this point, making it kind of hard to follow. I do however really like the falls count anywhere aspect as it means you don’t have to wait for them to get back to the ring for any drama.

Steiner dives off a balcony in the crowd onto Ray for two. Gee it was nice of Ray to stand there for a good ten seconds to wait on him to come crashing down on him like that. Ray and Steiner are at ringside now as are D-Von and Booker. I guess they can’t bare to be apart that long. Steiner gets two on Ray. The pairings haven’t switched for the entire match that I can remember.

The white guys get in the ring and a Steiner Line gets two. The fans still want tables. What’s Up to Steiner which probably doesn’t hurt that much due to the amount of steroids in him. It’s table time now and the fans are in a word really freaking happy with that decision. Steiner gets laid on one but here’s Booker for the save. The Mafia stands around FOREVER while D-Von is sitting on the ropes after being crotched.

The delay allows the Dudleys to set up the Doomsday Device through the table but Booker saves again, moving the table but the move hits like regular. Team 3D in control still here but it’s a Book End for Bubba through the table for two as he actually kicks out instead of having it saved. The Mafia in control now as things kind of grind to a halt. Scratch that as the Dudleys take over again. Back and forth match throughout so far.

Heel miscommunication lets D-Von get a belly to back on Steiner for two. Powerbomb out of the corner gets the same result with the same people. Axe kick misses D-Von and the 3D from 3D gets the pin on Booker, but at the same time Steiner rolls up Bubba and yep it’s a double pin. I was afraid of this. The threes went down at just about the same time which is rather helpful. We actually go to the video and the replay we see shows that those threes hit at the exact same time. The Mafia retain the belts and the fans aren’t exactly thrilled. WEAK finish as the video shows it was identical or at least way too close to call.

Rating: C-. Pretty good match but the ending really hurts it a lot. The fans chant BS during the highlight package which is very true. I mean dude, when EVER do they go to a replay to decide something in wrestling? Not a great brawl or anything but they did a lot of stuff right here. The ending crippled it though and there were a lot of dead spots in there that really hurt it.

Foley isn’t sure if he is ready for Nash or not. He did however get an extra $623 posing for pictures. Not really apparently but that’s the point of the feud. Nash wants the title because it brings him more money. Foley wants the title because wrestlers want to hold titles. I remember really wanting to see this match as the pairing is pretty interesting. Foley puts JB in charge of finding a barbed wire bat.

Recap of Nash vs. Foley which is what I just went over.

Legends Title: Kevin Nash vs. Mick Foley

Foley is champion and the Legends Title would evolve into the TV Title. I can’t believe it but the video package actually made me want to watch this again. Oh and Foley won the title from Nash in a tag match. Never been a fan of those but at least Foley pinned Nash for it. Foley waves at Nash just after the bell which is funny for some reason. Nash’s right hand is taped heavier than usual.

Surprisingly technical stuff to start as they lock up a few times. Naturally it turns into more of a brawl but that’s what these two likely should do. Foley hits a running knee lift but a double arm DDT can’t hit. There’s your first hard bump of the match as Foley gets kicked into the guardrail. They brawl outside and Nash takes over. The fans chant “over here” which is kind of a cool chant to me for some odd reason.

Chair shot by Nash hits post but Foley’s hits Big Sexy’s back. Foley tries the elbow off the apron but Nash gets the chair in to block it. Foley’s eye is busted now. Oh man that’s a bad one too. Nash drops some F Bombs and wisely fires jabs in at the eye. There’s blood on the camera which is kind of a cool visual. That’s a sick blood flow and in a very dangerous area too.

Half of Foley’s face is bloody and half isn’t. That’s a creepy/awesome look indeed. Foley says bring it on and actually fires back. A forearm puts Nash down and we get the Mankind rocking back and forth. Foley pulls his hair out as he’s all fired up now. That blood is flowing everywhere. BANG BANG as you can’t even see his eye anymore.

Nash’s forehead is busted a bit now too. Make that a lot now. That’s a GREAT looking cut. Ref is bumped and it’s barbed wire bat time. Tracy Brooks of all people comes out and the distraction is enough for Nash to hit a big boot and something we can’t see that wasn’t the powerbomb for the title.

Rating: C+. I liked it. This was a surprisingly good match here as these two actually had some chemistry. Fun match as their characters and philosophies were perfect opposites and the story made the match for the most part. The ending is fine for the most part and while it was kind of boring from an in ring match, it was still good I though. At least I liked it. Good thing I’m writing this too.

Post match Foley takes the bat to the head and Abyss comes out for the save with a bat of his own.

Sting isn’t worried about Kurt and Matt working together. He’ll never lose hope in the war against the Mafia. Does Sting do anything but go to war with heel factions?

We recap the triple threat. Morgan wanted in the Mafia so they used him as a lackey and then screwed him over. Morgan won a trilogy of matches with AJ to get the spot here. Angle implied that Morgan should help him keep the title and Morgan said no way.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Sting vs. Matt Morgan

To waste more time, everyone gets the camera shot of them coming to the ring and then a video about them. Big match intros waste another few minutes. I guess wrestling doesn’t matter yet. Angle is SKINNY here, maybe weighing 170. Morgan and Angle work together to start but Angle gets caught quickly by Sting, getting us down to one on one. Everyone on the floor now and the brawl is on.

Sting works over Morgan, sending him into the railing a few times. Morgan’s wife is here apparently. The Mafia takes over again and the beating continues. Morgan is all like I told you I’d help. Sting again fights them off and takes over for like the third time in this match. Both guys get splashes and Morgan is sent to the floor. Suplex gets two on Kurt who wakes up and drills Sting to take over again.

We talk about AJ not being here and how he has a major announcement on Impact which was to be his retirement until Sting stepped in to save the day. Back in the ring the Angle Slam is countered into a Scorpion attempt but Morgan makes the save. Slam gets two. Ankle lock is reversed and it’s Morgan vs. Sting again. There are the corner elbows and Morgan just drops him instead of hitting a side slam which gets two.

Fallaway slam hits as Kurt really shouldn’t be down this long due to a reversed ankle lock. Angle pulls the top rope down to send Morgan to the floor and the not-exactly-giant isn’t happy. Morgan says the deal is over and hits the Carbon Footprint to take down Kurt on the floor. Well at least he has a reason to be down now. Kurt claims a shoulder injury now. There’s no one to count the pin that Morgan has on Sting now and Matt isn’t pleased.

Scorpion Death Drop in the ring and now Hebner is right there. Does that make Morgan Bret Hart some how? Now Kurt is holding his neck. Make up your crazy mind already dude. Morgan takes Sting’s head off with the kick and Hebner is slow getting there again, only for Kurt to pull him out. “You screwed Matt!” Kurt brings in a chair and takes both guys down with chair shots, good for the pin on Morgan to retain.

Rating: C. Just a triple threat here as not a lot was really accomplished here. Morgan gets screwed over again and Kurt is still champion. Sting of course will keep fighting and that’s about it. The match was just ok and nothing special in the slightest. Not a horrible match or anything but nothing that you couldn’t see on any other show.

Overall Rating: D. There’s some decent stuff here and there but overall this just fell flat. It was ALL about the Mafia here and that’s not exactly the most enthralling formula for a PPV. This was certainly a B level PPV and it came off as one: nothing significant seems to have happened, despite both midcard titles changing hands. Nothing to see here as nothing was a particularly great match or even very good. Pretty weak show but not horrid or anything.

 

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Monday Nitro #132
Date: March 23, 1998
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

The main story for tonight is the return of Roddy Piper, although I’m not sure how many people were asking for him back. We’re coming up on Spring Stampede and the main event has been announced as Sting defending the title against Randy Savage. In theory that’s the main event at least as Hogan might have some match that needs to go on last instead. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Piper right off the bat to get things going. He’s been pontificating on a mountain in Oregon (their words not mine) and is now back as a consultant. I’ll leave out the ridiculously lame Louisville Slugger puns for the sake of my readers. In honor of being in Louisville, he announces the first baseball bat match at Spring Stampede between himself and Giant vs. Hogan/Nash.

As for tonight it’s Giant vs. Nash and Piper vs. Savage, which would have been awesome ten years earlier. Apparently Giant is in the back eating bacon, eggs and midgets so he can smash Nash. Piper talks about being a psycho because he was in Alcatraz. Did we ever need to bring that up again?

Nitro Girls.

Sting defends against Page tonight. That’s a pretty big match for free.

We see the DDP on MTV clip from Thunder with Raven attacking him and stealing the US Title.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Ultimo Dragon

Tony is already hyping up the rest of the show and ignoring the match. Dragon hits a quick handspring elbow to knock Chavo to the floor followed by a nice dive. Back in and Chavo grabs a quick chinlock but Dragon elbows out and hits a standing Lionsault for two. Chavo gets a near fall of his own off a German suplex as this is going VERY fast so far. A northern lights suplex gets two more for Chavo but he gets crotched on the top to slow the momentum. Chavo gets down and tries to suplex Dragon in from the apron, only to get caught in the Dragon Sleeper for the submission. Short match but very fast paced stuff.

Post match Eddie rips into Chavo for not winning like he told his nephew to do. Chavo needs to apologize to Grandma RIGHT NOW.

Here are Hogan and Bischoff with something to say. Hogan says he’s not afraid of Piper or Giant, bat or not. Larry: “I’m already bored.” Piper comes out a few seconds later and asks Hogan about the bat match. Hollywood agrees on behalf of himself and Nash because Rupert Murdoch, a guy trying to buy the LA Dodgers, has been asking him for tips on how to swing a bat.

Hogan says he’s always the champion but has to stop for a YOU SUCK chant. Hogan talks about the fans liking Piper’s legs in his sisters “itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot mini skirt.” He says he and Nash are going to take out Giant tonight, apparently meaning it’s a handicap match tonight.

CALL THE HOTLINE!

Scott Steiner vs. Wayne Bloom

Scott immediately drops to the floor to talk about arm size with Buff. Back in and Steiner easily takes Bloom to the mat with an amateur move. The bicep curl into the elbow drop sets up the pushups as Steiner is dominating. Bloom gets up a boot in the corner and he hits an atomic drop for his jobber offense. A snap suplex gets two but Bloom ducks his head and gets caught in the butterfly powerbomb. Steiner hits a middle rope Samoan Drop and the Recliner is good for the submission. Squash.

Some Kentucky Wildcats are here. It’s the day after their historic comeback win over Duke so they’re the talk of the college basketball world. I remember the theme for Midnight Madness (the first practice of the year which is always televised) was WWF. The players all had ring introductions and some came out with belts.

More Nitro Girls.

Lodi vs. Psychosis

Lodi grabs a headlock to start, showing off something about Rush on his back. The fans are all over Lodi and Psychosis takes his head off with a clothesline for two. Lodi gets in some shots to take over but spends too much time on the top, allowing Psychosis to dropkick him to the floor. A BIG dive off the top, similar to a Whisper in the Wind, takes Lodi down and the guillotine legdrop is good for the pin back inside. Another short match but that dive looked good.

Hour #2 begins.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Page is US Champion and challenging but for the sake of clarity I’ll only refer to Sting as champion. The name plate on Sting’s belt is still blank. Tony thinks this is Page’s biggest match ever. Careful out on that limb Tony. They lock up to start and fall to the floor without breaking contact. Back in and the champion cranks on the arm but Page comes back with the driving shoulders. Sting gets two off a rollup and tries an early Scorpion to no avail.

The champion tries the hold again but Page quickly makes a rope and it’s a standoff. Page blocks a hiptoss and gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. The Diamond Cutter is blocked and it’s another standoff. Page fires off elbows in the corner and gets two off the Pancake. We hit the chinlock on the champion with Page cranking on it. Back up and Page rains down right hands in the corner but gets dropped face first on the buckle. A shot to Page’s head gets two and the champion hooks a chinlock of his own.

They’re going for the epic showdown style here and it’s working as well as it can for a Nitro in late March from Louisville to start the second hour. The hold stays on for a good while and the crowd calms down a lot. After over ninety seconds in the hold Page fights up but gets caught by a jumping clothesline.

Page comes back with a belly to belly suplex but Sting backdrops out of another Pancake attempt. They slug it out with Sting taking over and hitting his hair grab bulldog for two. Another bulldog sets up the top rope splash but Page gets his knees up. Page throws Sting in the corner and pounds away but Sting blocks a pair of Diamond Cutter attempt and grabs Page’s head for the Death Drop to retain.

Rating: B. Cut the chinlocks down by a minute or so and this is bordering on a classic. This is exactly what WCW was needing around this time (in the short term at least): a good wrestling match with the champion giving a rub to an upper midcard guy. At the end of the day, when all else fails, have a good wrestling match and a lot of your problems will fade away for a little bit.

Sting helps Page to his feet and does the Diamond Cutter sign. Nice touch.

Nitro Girls.

Nitro Party winner.

Lex Luger vs. Rick Fuller

Fuller is a big guy with a good look but almost nothing to back it up. How did Vince let a guy like that slip under his nose? They shove each other around to start but stereo shoulder blocks send neither guy anywhere. Fuller clubs Luger in the back to take over and follows up with a big clothesline and some choking. An elbow drop gets two and here’s Luger’s comeback. He fires off the clotheslines, atomic drops and the forearm to set up the Rack for the submission.

Rating: D+. I know there’s such a thing as formulas for wrestlers and it’s time for Luger to change his. Every week that goes by drags him further and further into a pit of dullness which looks to have no escape. There’s just nothing new to see here and the Racks on the big guys are getting less and less interesting each time.

Heenan is on commentary now.

Kaz Hayashi vs. Eddie Guerrero

Chavo is here for support. He holds the ropes open for Eddie so Eddie jumps over the top. When Eddie is being a jerk no one can touch him. Fast paced start with Eddie hitting a jumping back elbow and a high angle suplex for two. In an impressive move, Kaz goes up top for a moonsault press but Eddie dropkicks him out of the air.

Hayashi throws him to the floor and hits a suicide dive to put Eddie down. A missile dropkick gets two for Kaz so he goes up again, only to jump into a backbreaker from Eddie. Guerrero rakes the eyes with his boot and gets two off a pumphandle backbreaker. A superplex sets up the frog splash for the pin on Kaz.

Rating: C. Decent stuff here with Kaz doing the flips and Eddie supplying the good wrestling and heelish actions. It’s nice to see an interesting story like this with two talented guys like the Guerreros. The story works well and it lets Eddie show off a bit which he hasn’t gotten to do in far too long.

Post match Chavo checks on Kaz and gets yelled at by Eddie.

Profile on Bret Hart. The guy has been around for over four months and he’s had what, three matches? This company really was clueless.

Konnan vs. Prince Iaukea

Before the match we get a video on Konnan which is a highlight package, mainly of him beating up Norman Smiley. Prince speeds things up to start and knocks Konnan out to the floor. Back in and Konnan hits his rolling lariat and a basement dropkick as Heenan talks about Okerlund doing a luau. Off to a leg pull from Konnan (think a half crab but with Konnan laying on his back and pulling up) followed by a DDT for no cover. Konnan pulls on his pants a lot and puts on a kneeling half crab. Is sitting up really that hard for him?

A suplex gets two for Konnan and he strikes on Iaukea in the corner. Konnan hooks up a very interesting looking submission where he starts with a Sharpshooter leg tie up but intertwines Prince’s arm and bends the legs back while standing instead of turning over. Even Tenay has no idea what to call it. The hold doesn’t last long and he opts for a release German suplex for no cover.

Off to a lame Fujiwara armbar before just ramming Prince’s face into the mat over and over again. They run the ropes and botch….something before trading some awkward looking rollups for two each. Konnan’s 187 is countered into a northern lights suplex for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: D+. There were some interesting moves in there but the last minute or so was really sloppy stuff. It was like the wheels were starting to fall off the match so they just went home immediately. Iaukea continues to be nothing special at all but for some reason he continues to be pushed on television over and over.

Here’s Jericho with something to say. Jericho cheers for Stanford before they play Kentucky in the basketball tournament. I’m surprised that didn’t get a face pop given the hatred between Louisville and Kentucky. He keeps going until Lenny Lane comes out, saying Jericho owes him $1000 for the shenanigans with Dean Malenko a few weeks ago on Thunder. Jericho says Lane stole all the stuff from his bag and his Loverboy tape is missing too. Lane owes Jericho $1000 for the smell in his gear. He says to let him have it and you know what’s coming.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Jericho vs. Lenny Lane

Jericho is in trouble after getting popped in the face and Lane gets a quick backdrop for two. The champion comes right back with a shot to the face and is still in the Monday Night Jericho shirt. Lane counters the Liontamer into a rollup for two followed by a Skull Crushing Finale (which Jericho would later use as the Breakdown) for the same. Lenny tries to jump over Jericho in the corner but gets caught in an Alabama Slam, setting up the Liontamer to retain the title.

Third hour begins.

The Giant vs. Kevin Nash/Hollywood Hogan

Hogan is the shortest guy in this match. He starts with Giant as Tony explains that this is a handicap match because of the NWO winning at Fall Brawl a few years ago. Wasn’t it at Uncensored last year where they gained power? Eh I can’t complain as it’s a miracle that they mentioned it at all. Hogan can’t slam Giant and is thrown around with ease. Giant takes him into the corner for a hard chop and stomps him down in another corner.

Hogan bails to the floor for advice from Bischoff before coming back in with a knee to the ribs. Giant is staggered and Hogan takes over, only to get caught in a a backbreaker to send him to the floor. Back in and Hogan makes the tag off to Nash who pounds on Giant like he’s not even there. You know, the guy that had Nash running away just eight days ago. Giant reverses a whip and sends him into the corner for a clothesline and a headbutt. Hogan comes in to help out but Giant shrugs them off. Disciple comes in and it’s a DQ.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t anything special and the ending isn’t all that surprising. I’m wondering when if ever Nash is going to do the job for Giant. The heat is off the feud at this point and there’s little for Giant to gain by beating him now, which was probably Nash’s idea when the whole thing started. Match was nothing of note but Giant throwing people around was fun to see as usual.

Disciple tries to Stun Giant but the big man just stands there with a funny look on his face. Bischoff tries to come in and gets chokeslammed to death.

More Nitro Girls.

TV Title: Booker T vs. Chris Benoit

So Benoit loses to Norton on Thunder and gets a title match as a result? Booker starts with a headlock and runs Benoit over until Chris comes back with some HARD chops. Back up and Booker snaps off a powerslam to get a breather. They fight over a test of strength but Benoit bridges up, only to be kicked in the head to put him back down. Booker hits a big clothesline but has to block a German suplex attempt.

The second try is more successful and Benoit stomps away at Booker before elbowing him down for two. We hit the chinlock on the champion but he fights up and hits a flapjack to put Benoit down. The Spinarooni sets up the side kick but Benoit breaks up the missile dropkick. A superplex from the Canadian puts both guys down and it’s time to roll some Germans. It takes awhile for both guys to get up and Booker scores first with a spinebuster for a delayed two. Booker misses the side kick and hits the ropes to give Benoit a breather. They chop it out and the time limit runs out at about seven and a half minutes. Booker retains.

Rating: B-. The match was great and at least benoit didn’t lose. I’d assume this sets up a rematch at Spring Stampede with no time limit so Benoit can lose on a bigger stage. Again though, why have him lose to Scott Norton when you have him go straight into a title program after coming off another title program? It’s almost like they have no idea where they’re going with this.

Curt Hennig vs. Jim Neidhart

Rick Rude takes over Tenay’s spot at the announce table for this match. Bulldog shoves him off the ropes and runs him over. Hennig’s monkey flip is avoided via a cartwheel before he accepts a test of strength for some reason. Heenan is sucking up to Rude as only the Brain can. A clothesline takes Hennig down for two and Rude leaves. Heenan under his breath: “What a jerk.” We take a break and come back with Bulldog hitting the powerslam but having to go after Rude and getting handcuffed for the DQ. Not long enough to rate but it was just there to set up the post match stuff.

Bulldog is handcuffed to the ropes until Bret Hart remembers he works here and comes out for the save. Bret cleans house as Doug Dillinger gets the cuffs unlocked. Hart talks about being screwed (yes, again) and says he isn’t going to allow that to happen to anyone here.

Goldberg vs. Renegade

Interesting note: Renegade comes out to Marc Mero’s theme music from the WWF. It’s not a similar song. It’s the EXACT same music. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a song go from company to company like that other than a few commercial/public domain songs. Renegade hits a cartwheel elbow in the corner and turns around for the spear and Jackhammer to make Goldberg 60-0.

Randy Savage vs. Roddy Piper

Piper charges into the ring but Liz grabs him by the ankle. Roddy pounds away on Savage anyway and whips him with the belt as Heenan mentions the cage match that set this up five months ago. Savage is sent to the floor so Piper can disrobe in peace. Piper whips him over the barricade for a bit before ripping up the floor mats. Liz rakes Roddy’s back to break up the piledriver on the floor, earning her a kiss. Savage gets in a single shot but gets caught in a sleeper back inside. Liz is knocked off the apron as Randy breaks up the hold with a jawbreaker. Here’s the NWO as the match just kind of ends.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t a bad wild brawl but it wasn’t anything more. I know Piper was a huge deal about ten years before this, but is he really a big enough deal in 1998 to have him come in cold and beat the tar out of the #1 contender for a few minutes? Not much to see here, as is the norm for Nitro main events.

Hogan yells at Nash for not hitting Piper and takes the bat, only to miss Savage. Cue Sting with a bat of his own but Savage jumps Sting from behind. Giant comes in and takes both bats to run the NWO off. About a minute and a half of replays take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. You could tell they were starting to feel the heat from the WWF at this point given how stacked they made this show. The wrestling on here was better than Nitro has had in a long time and it made the show a lot easier to get through. I don’t get the lack of follow up on Goldberg attacking the NWO, but I’d guess it was because they needed to focus on Piper instead of Goldberg, because if one guy is your future in 1998, it’s Roddy Piper. Good show this week but again it needed to be an hour shorter.

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Starrcade 1999
Date: December 19, 1999
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 8,582
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, Bobby Heenan

 

Other than the main event, there isn’t much here. The card is thirteen matches long as opposed to the eight or nine that we’ve had for the past few years. The only other main match on the card is a battle of the powerbombs between Nash and Sid who returned earlier this year. There just isn’t much to see here but that’s the case with Russo shows. Another interesting sign about this show: the attendance. Starrcade 1997-2000 were all in the same arena. 1997 drew 17,500 fans, 1998 drew about 16,000, 1999 drew about 8,500 and 2000 drew about 6,500. The writing is on the wall already. Let’s get to it.

 

The intro video lists off all of the matches tonight, starting with the least interesting of them all. Usually it’s the other way around.

 

Disco Inferno/Lash Leroux vs. Mamalukes

 

Leroux is a pretty generic cruiserweight from Louisiana. The Mamalukes are two Italian guys named Johnny the Bull and Big Vito who are your basic mafia gimmick. Vito and Lash start after a quick brawl. The Cajun guy is pounded into the corner as Vito does every Mafia stereotype you can think of. Lash takes a side kick to the face and it’s off to Johnny for some double stomping. Leroux takes him down with a hiptoss and it’s to Disco. Inferno gets two on the Bull via a clothesline and two off a clothesline and Russian legsweep.

 

As Disco stomps away in the corner, we get the story behind this: apparently Disco owes the Italians’ manager Tony Marinara (just go with it) $25,000 and the makeshift team is together because they used to not like each other but now respect one another. Disco has also tarred and feathered Marinara before pouring meat sauce on Vito and the Bull. I’ve heard stupider angles. I can’t think of many but I’ve heard of them.

 

The Mamalukes take over and it’s off to Vito who hits a neckbreaker to give Johnny a two count. After a quick chinlock by the Bull and some double teaming including a wishbone split for Disco’s legs, a double powerbomb gets no cover on Inferno. Instead Vito misses a middle rope splash and it’s off to Lash.

 

Leroux speeds things up and takes Vito down with a spin kick before making the heels hit each other by mistake. Everything breaks down and the Italians hit a double clothesline to take over. Disco and Vito go to the floor as Johnny misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing Disco to hit a splash for two. Everyone is back in again and Disco tries his Chartbuster (Stunner) but Vito breaks it up, sending Disco into Lash for a Chartbuster to his partner for no apparent reason. That and a spinning inverted DDT to Disco are enough for the pin by Vito.

 

Rating: C-. Very basic tag match here but I’ve seen worse. Again though, the idea of this story being based around a guy named Tony Marinara does it no favors and makes for a rather stupid story all around. Disco continues to be impressive though as he was nothing but a comedy character who lasted for many years with the company. He also wasn’t half bad in the ring, but his career was hindered by the character.

 

Post match Disco’s face is covered with an ether rag and placed in a body bag. The Italians carry him to a waiting car and drive off.

 

The announcers hype up the rest of the card.

 

We’re told that US Champion Scott Hall is injured and therefore has to forfeit the title. Here’s Chris Benoit who is awarded the title in Hall’s absence, so he issues an open challenge for a title defense later on in the show. The match will be a ladder match like Benoit vs. Hall was scheduled to be. Ok then.

 

Cruiserweight Title: Madusa vs. Evan Karagias

 

Evan is a generic pretty boy wrestler and is defending. These two used to be a couple but have since split over the title. Madusa jumps him on the way to the ring and sends him into the steps to take over. Evan can’t bring himself to hit her but then he punches her down anyway. What drama indeed as the reaction from the fans (or lack thereof) can tell you. A slam puts Madusa down but Karagias misses a moonsault (which would have missed even if she hadn’t rolled away) and Madusa hits (kind of) a middle rope dropkick for no cover.

 

She goes up again, only to be slammed down by Karagias. They trade powerbombs (Tony on Madusa’s: “that was almost like a powerbomb!”) followed by a neckbreaker from Evan. The fans rightly think this is boring as Evan dives on Madusa on the floor. Cue Evan’s chick Spice to turn on him with a low blow, allowing Madusa to German suplex Karagias down for the title. Did I mention that Spice and Evan hooked up on Monday, making this turn completely pointless?

 

Rating: F. Madusa is one of those very annoying female wrestlers who is supposed to be interesting because she’s a female wrestler, but at the end of the day she just isn’t entertaining. Karagias was as generic of a wrestler as you could get, making this to be absolutely terrible and sloppy on top of that.

 

Cue Norman Smiley in Washington Redskins gear to scream a lot before the match. See he’s a coward, so a producer saying they’re out of time terrifies him.

 

Hardcore Title: Meng vs. Norman Smiley

 

See, it’s funny because it’s a monster vs. a coward. Norman brings out a dumpster full of weapons but puts on a helmet before starting things off. Smiley, the champion, throws the weapons into the ring but has them thrown back at him, sending Norman running off. A garbage can to the head sends Norman staggering away and we head to the back after about fifteen seconds of “action”.

 

Meng is hit by a chair a few times but a trashcan shot has no effect. They head to the catering area with Norman stumbling around. This is a Vince Russo trademark by the way. Meng pounds away on him, throwing Norman through a table. Norman finds a fire extinguisher to blast Meng with, only to have hardcore guys Fit Finlay and Brian Knobbs show up to beat Meng down. A shot to the head with some kind of a metal bar is enough to knock Meng out, allowing Norman to come out from under a table and retain the title.

 

Rating: D-. These are the same kind of matches that the WWF was having at the time and they were doing them much better. The problem here is that these matches are done over and over again and they just aren’t funny anymore. Norman constantly ran around while screaming, only to win the title due to some shocking coincidence. Nothing to see here, again.

 

David Flair, Ric’s son, is presented with a golden crowbar as a gift. Ok then.

 

Punk band The Misfits kidnaps Oklahoma, a character designed to make fun of WWF announcer Jim Ross. This will be explained better in a bit.

 

We recap the Revolution vs. Jim Duggan. Fed up with never getting elevated up the card, Perry Saturn, Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko and Shane Douglas formed a group called the Revolution, which was designed to rebel against the established veterans to take their spot on the top of the card. WCW, in its infinite wisdom, turned them into an anti-American group who declared statehood, thereby ticking off patriot (and resident WCW janitor) Jim Duggan. Duggan will have mystery partners for an eight man tag tonight.

 

Jim Duggan/???/???/??? vs. Revolution

 

Oh and if Duggan loses, the Revolution has to do his janitor job for thirty days, but if Duggan loses he has to renounce his citizenship on Nitro. Duggan’s partners are…..the Varsity Club. Yes, the same three guys (Rick Steiner, Kevin Sullivan and Mike Rotundo) from 1988 are back again for absolutely no apparent reason. Instead of Shane in the match, it’s WCW’s version of WWF bodybuilding chick Chyna, named Asya. Get the joke? Also Benoit isn’t here because of the US Title match later tonight.

 

Duggan wants to start the match himself so he sticks his tongue out at the Varsity Club. Saturn starts for the Revolution and gets pounded down by Duggan so it’s Malenko’s turn. Jim beats him down as well with the Three Point Clothesline but he doesn’t seem interested in tagging. The Varsity Club yells at him and you can feel the heel turn coming from here. Saturn comes in again with a springboard missile dropkick to take Duggan down.

 

The Revolution takes turns beating on Duggan in the corner as this is rapidly going nowhere. Dean hits him with the Revolution flag and even Asya gets in some shots of her own. The Varsity Club finally gets bored of standing on the apron and everything breaks down. To the shock of no one paying attention, the former heel stable turns on Duggan and lays him out, allowing Douglas to come in and steal the pin.

 

Rating: D. As predicted, no one knew who the Varsity Club was so no one cared when they turned on him. Why Duggan would pick them as partners is beyond me, but as mentioned he wasn’t that bright. This was a waste of Malenko and Saturn, which is a big part of why the bailed to the WWF along with Guerrero and Benoit in about a month.

 

The Misfits have Oklahoma in a one man cage and berate him a bit.

 

Vampiro vs. Steve Williams

 

The Misfits are Vampiro’s friends and Williams is Oklahoma’s heavy. Oklahoma is designed to do one thing and one thing only: make fun of Jim Ross. Vampiro gets five minutes against Oklahoma is he wins, but since Oklahoma has a mic on we have to hear him talk during the match. Vampiro climbs on top of the cage to start and dives down onto Williams before whipping him into the barricade. A kick to the face staggers Doc and we head inside for the first time.

 

Vampiro pounds on Williams as this is already going nowhere, much like the majority of the card tonight. Doc fires back with some chops, causing Oklahoma to shout CHOP CHOP CHOP because that’s FUNNY you see. Williams hits some shoulder blocks but misses a splash in the corner. A suplex puts Williams down but as Vampiro goes up, Doc pops up with a superplex, nearly breaking Vampiro’s neck in the process. That’s enough for the wrestling so here are the Misfits to distract Williams. Vampiro kicks Doc down but a second kick is caught in a suplex. Williams pounds away until he shoves the referee for the lame DQ.

 

Rating: D. So to be clear, Vampiro was supposed to be a big deal in WCW around this time, so let’s have him get destroyed by someone who hasn’t been around in years for the sake of pushing a feud to make fun of someone who isn’t even in this company anymore. Did I mention that 1999 was a really stupid year for WCW?

 

The five minute clock immediately starts despite Oklahoma being in the cage still.

 

Vampiro vs. Oklahoma

 

To further the stupidity, Williams beats Vampiro up for about two more minutes while Oklahoma spouts off stupid jokes from inside the cage. Oklahoma finally gets out and drops Vampiro again with a DDT before stomping away in the corner. Vampiro gets up so Oklahoma runs, only to have the Misfits throw him back in. After a few low blows from Oklahoma (yeah the announcer is hanging in there with a wrestler. Why are you surprised?), Vampiro hits a Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) for the pin. They weren’t even “fighting” for a minute.

 

The Powers That Be (the faceless bosses of the company) talk to Creative Control/Curt Hennig, telling them to go become #1 contenders in the six man tag. The faceless voice seems distracted and says something big is going down tonight.

 

Harlem Heat and Midnight, a big muscular chick that no one cared about, get in an argument before said six man. Stevie walks out due to Midnight.

 

Harlem Heat/Midnight vs. Creative Control/Curt Hennig

 

It’s a handicap match because Stevie is gone. Creative Control is a pair of big bald twins named Gerald and Patrick who have teamed for years under a variety of names. The winning team here become number one contenders to the tag belts. Booker and we’ll say Patrick start things off with Booker being shoved into the corner. Booker fights back with a spin kick to the head for two but the twins double team Booker by working on his ribs. Gerald gets taken down by a forearm and put in an armbar before it’s off to Midnight.

 

She stays on the arm but gets taken into the corner and pounded with some shoulders. Booker comes in very quickly but is tripped up by Patrick as the heels quickly take over. Curt comes in for all of five seconds before it’s back to Gerald who gets two off a big boot. Patrick comes in again and gets caught by an ax kick for two before Midnight gets another tag. Hennig comes in again and after ducking a leapfrog, decks Midnight in the back of the head to knock her to the floor.

 

Curt stays on Midnight as the fans simply don’t care. The announcers talk about the big deal that the Powers That be were talking about with Hudson asking what could be bigger than Disco Inferno being thrown in a car. Like I said, 1999 was very stupid. Stevie finally comes out but Booker tells him to leave, which Stevie does.

 

Patrick comes back in for a slam and a series of elbow drops. Booker makes the save as Stevie is still at ringside. Patrick misses a middle rope elbow drop and there’s the tag to Booker, but the referee is with Stevie. Booker cleans house but Curt hits him in the head with a foreign object, allowing Gerald to get the pin.

 

Rating: D. This is yet ANOTHER match that could have been on Nitro and had no business here at all. That’s the problem with almost everything so far: it’s either stupid or WAY too short to mean anything at all. Other than the opener, nothing has lasted more than nine minutes so far which makes it hard to get interested in anything.

 

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett. Rhodes had returned as a man in black and white named Seven who was based on the seven deadly sins. That sounds interesting, so Dustin dropped the gimmick and became just Dustin Rhodes, who isn’t interesting no matter how many times you remind us that he’s Dusty’s son. Jeff Jarrett is tired of him so tonight it’s a Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning hardcore match.

 

Dustin is in the back and complaining about his father not working here anymore when Jarrett jumps him to start the match.

 

Jeff Jarrett vs. Dustin Rhodes

 

Jarrett takes it back into the arena and runs Rhodes over with a wheelbarrow full of guitars. Dustin is wheeled into the barricade but Rhodes comes back with a cold drink to the face. They head inside with Dustin getting in some shots to the back with a wooden stick. It’s time for the bullrope and cowbell because that’s what guys from Texas use. They head outside again with Jeff being pounded on the announce table and being pulled into the post by the rope.

 

Back in and Dustin throws powder into Jeff’s eyes before pulling out some duct tape. Oh wait first of all let’s have a few whips with a belt and beat up the referee. The referee is taped to the ropes but Jeff is still blinded by the powder. Jeff gets in a shot to the ribs as Curt Hennig comes out to untie the referee. A wooden stick is broken over Rhodes’ back before Jeff puts on a sleeper. Back up and Dustin gets two off a quick belly to belly suplex as the fans are REALLY restless now.

 

Dustin gets a rollup but Hennig breaks it up to give Jarrett a near fall of his own. Back up and Dustin hits Shattered Dreams on Jarrett (if you don’t know what that is, keep it that way) but Hennig pulls the referee out. Curt has his own dreams shattered but Dustin is backdropped to the floor by Jeff. They head up to the set and climb up the structure before hopping back down. Hennig is back again but gets bulldogged on the concrete. Jarrett climbs up on the set with a guitar to crack Dustin in the head for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. This is one of the best matches of the night so far. Let that sink in for a minute. This is also the first match to break ten minutes tonight and we’re eight matches into the show. These hardcore matches are getting really hard to sit through as they’re getting repetitive and there’s such little focus on story that it’s almost impossible to get into them.

 

DDP promises to beat up David Flair with the crowbar.

 

David Flair vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

This is a crowbar on a pole match, meaning if you climb the pole and bring the crowbar down, you can use it on the other guy. They’re fighting because DDP took out Ric Flair, sending David into insanity. David brings his own crowbar to attack Page from behind. The referee takes it away which should be considered theft when you think about it. Apparently Page can’t continue but he shoves the announcer before the match can end, so let’s get going with the bell. How can you not continue a match that hasn’t started yet?

 

As I try to figure that out, Flair stomps on Page in the corner but gets rolled up for two. A sunset flip is easily blocked by a Page right hand so Flair takes him down with a DDT for two. DDP gets up and pounds away in the corner, only to be clotheslined down for two. The announcers are shocked at Flair’s abilities, as before this he had been a complete joke (and US Champion but the less said about that the better).

 

Page clotheslines him down but can’t follow up. David gets up first and puts on a figure four, only to have it reversed a few seconds later. There’s the crowbar (which was maybe seven feet above the mat, making the “climb” a joke) but a single swing misses, allowing the Diamond Cutter to end David quick.

 

Rating: F. ANOTHER worthless match here that didn’t even break four minutes. The crowbar wasn’t a factor whatsoever, making me wonder why this match even existed. That’s what this show can be summed up as: a bunch of quick ideas which have no time to develop, meaning that as soon as they’re done you forget about them because they didn’t have enough time to mean anything.

 

Post match Page hits a Diamond Cutter off the top rope but as he lifts the crowbar, a fan who is obsessed with Flair comes in for the save. She would be revealed as Daffney soon after this.

 

We recap Sting vs. Total Package (Lex Luger) which is all about Elizabeth. The idea is Luger abuses her by making her wrestle in dangerous or humiliating matches, so tonight her contract with Luger is on the line in Sting vs. Luger’s match.

 

Sting vs. The Total Package

 

Luger changed his name to the Total Package (his nickname for years), which was supposed to make him a TOTALLY different guy. This worked about as well as you would expect given that by this point, Luger was pretty much a parody of himself. Before the match, Sting gives Liz a SPECIAL can of mace to use just in case something happens. Luger jumps Sting as he comes in before stomping away. Sting is sent to the floor and rammed into the apron for good measure.

 

Back in and Luger pounds Sting down for two as he keeps looking out at Liz. Sting no sells a ram into the corner as Liz is now on the apron. A suplex is no sold as well and Luger gets pinballed back and forth between Sting and Liz. Sting and Luger clothesline each other down and Liz has the mace. She goes to turn on Sting (a running joke at this point) but the can is silly string, because for the first time ever, STING OUTSMARTED SOMEONE! Liz bails and Sting pounds away on Luger with an atomic drop and top rope splash for two. There are two Stinger Splashes but Liz comes in for the DQ.

 

Rating: D. This was a one joke match and while the joke was good, it was clear that neither guy was interested in doing anything here. It’s another match not even making it to six minutes, which makes you wonder why this match needed to be on PPV at all. Luger deteriorated so far in just a few months that it was uncanny.

 

Liz hits Sting in the jaw with the bat, knocking him out cold. Luger crushes Sting’s wrist with a chair, putting him out until March.

 

Sid vs. Kevin Nash

 

This is a powerbomb match, meaning the first person to hit the move wins. Basically they’re fighting because they’re both big and both use the same move. Nash is one half of the tag champions with the injured Hall. Nash takes him into the corner to start and fires off his usual knees to the ribs and elbows to the jaw. They botch a double clothesline as only Sid goes down. Back up and a low blow stops Sid’s powerbomb attempt, sending him to the floor. Nash has one blocked on the floor as well before Sid rams him back first into the apron a few times.

 

Nash is sent into the barricade a few times as this is already very slow paced. A chair to the back keeps Nash down again and Sid yells at the fans a lot. Back in and a clothesline puts Nash down and there’s a legdrop for good measure. Sid fails at starting a powerbomb chant but Nash pokes him in the eye. There goes the referee as you would expect, followed by a horrible looking powerbomb by Sid. Cue Jeff Jarrett to break a guitar over Sid’s head as the referee wakes up. Nash can’t get Sid up so he tells the referee he powerbombed Sid…..AND THAT’s GOOD ENOUGH FOR THE REFEREE, meaning Nash wins.

 

Rating: F. There was a match designed to keep either guy from having to be pinned, and the match was won because Nash said that he powerbombed the other guy. The fact that this company survived the year 2000 is absolutely stunning considering how long these same guys were on top.

 

Benoit says the open challenge hasn’t been answered yet but he’s heading to the ring to face somebody.

 

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. ???

 

This is a ladder match, meaning the belt is hanging from the ceiling and you have to climb a ladder to bring it down. And it’s Jeff Jarrett. The roster is as stacked as it is so we have Jarrett appear in his third match of the night. You couldn’t possibly throw Booker T or Malenko or someone like that out there right? Tony: “Jeff Jarrett? Again?” Benoit is cool with fighting Jarrett and brings him in for a hard clothesline and an elbow to the face. A backbreaker takes Jeff down and a superplex does it even better.

 

Benoit brings in the first ladder but Jeff baseball slides it into Chris’ ribs before blasting him in the face to take over. Back inside and the ladder is set up in the corner but it’s Jeff being whipped into it by Benoit. The champion heads up for the belt but Jeff pulls Benoit down and crotches him on the top rope. The earlier ladder shot to Benoit’s head has busted him open. Benoit is whipped into the ladder in the corner but he comes right back for a whip of his own to put Jarrett down.

 

Jeff responds by putting Benoit in the ladder and dropping it back onto the champion in a painful looking landing. Benoit comes back by tying Jarrett’s legs in the ladder and hanging him upside down, only to have Jarrett shake Benoit off the ladder to put both guys down. Jarrett goes up again but gets dumped off, only to do the exact same thing to Benoit a few moments later.

 

Benoit gets up and shoves the ladder down again, sending a climbing Jeff down onto the ropes. Chris goes up but Jeff dropkicks the ladder from the top rope, sending Benoit crashing down in a scary fall. Back up again and Benoit rams the ladder into Jarrett’s face to put him down, allowing Chris to climb up…..and hit a Swan Dive headbutt to knock Jarrett out even colder. Benoit climbs up and keeps the title.

 

Rating: B-. It’s not great but this is by far and away the best match of the night so far. The fact that there wasn’t a boring and stupid story to this helped it a lot. Instead of having to adjust to some idiotic idea, they just went out there and beat each other up for ten minutes. Given what we’ve had to sit through on this show so far, that’s the best thing they could have done.

 

Bret says he’ll win because he wants to prove how great he is.

 

WCW World Title: Bret Hart vs. Goldberg

 

Bret is defending and this is No DQ. He won the title at Mayhem in November and Goldberg wanted a shot, so for some reason they won the tag titles, only to lose them in a few weeks. Ignoring the fact that it took two years for Bret to win the WCW Title, I’ve heard worse ideas for the main event of the biggest show of the year. Goldberg is the more popular guy but they’re both mostly good guys. They shake hands and we’re ready to go.

 

Feeling out process to start until Goldberg shoves him to the floor with ease. Back in and Bret headlocks him down to the mat, only to have Goldberg fight up and hit a gorilla press into a powerslam to wake the crowd up a bit. A clothesline puts Bret down and Goldberg puts on a leg lock, only to be countered into a Sharpshooter attempt. Goldberg kicks him away and they head to the floor where the referee is bumped less than five minutes into the match.

 

A second referee comes out as Bret is dropped onto the barricade chest face. Back inside and a big boot to the face puts Bret down. A powerslam looks to do the same….and there goes the second referee. Bret avoids the spear and puts the Figure Four on around the post. There’s a third referee in (remember we’re maybe seven minutes into this at most) as Bret drops the hold around the post. Back in and Bret goes after the leg by cannonballing down onto it and bending the leg around the ropes.

 

Off to a figure four by Bret and Goldberg is in trouble. The fans chant his name and Goldberg turns it over. Bret makes the rope….which shouldn’t mean anything in a No DQ match but what has made sense tonight? Bret stays on the leg in the corner but Goldberg chokes him into the corner and pounds away, only to knock down the third referee.

 

In the famous moment of the match, Goldberg hits a superkick to Bret’s head, giving Bret such a concussion that his career basically ended right there. Bret would wrestle five more times in WCW in the next three weeks and then not again for over ten years. Anyway, the spear puts Bret down and here’s Roddy Piper to be referee. The distraction legs Bret hit him in the knee and load up the Sharpshooter…..and it’s Montreal AGAIN, with Piper calling for the bell before Bret can turn the hold over.

 

Rating: C-. Bret killing kick aside, this wasn’t much to see. The leg work was fine and looked to be setting up an interesting ending, but why do that when you can have ANOTHER Montreal Screwjob moment? The match watch wasn’t too bad, but after two hours of drek like we’ve just sat through, you need something WAY better than this.

 

Overall Rating: F. As in failure. That’s what this show was on almost all levels. The ladder match is quite good (imagine that: two guys who were 32 at this time had the best match of the night) and the opening tag match is watchable. There’s your biggest problem: arguably the second best match of the night is the Disco Inferno and Lash Leroux vs. the Marinara Goon Squad.

 

Like I said, there are thirteen matches on the card and three of them (Bunkhouse, ladder, world title) break ten minutes. Everything else goes by so fast that you don’t have time to determine if it’s good or bad. All you know is that something happened, but so much other stuff is flying at you that you can’t process anything else. That’s Russo booking 101: throw everything you can at the audience and hope they like something instead of slowing down a bit and letting a good show develop. Terrible show which illustrates everything wrong with the company at the moment.

 

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Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Another year another Summerslam and yet again the company has changed. Tonight we have a double main event with a Wrestlemania rematch of Lesnar vs. Angle II for the Smackdown Title and an Elimination Chamber match for the Raw Title. 2003 was split down the middle in quality as Raw was atrocious and Smackdown was some of the best television in company history. It’s always interesting to see the two shows come together. Let’s get to it.

The US Marine Corps presents the American flag while Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video talks about how there is evil in this world and the Chamber tonight will prove it.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

The Dudleyz are challenging and the EVIL foreigners are Rene Dupree and Sylvain Grenier. Bubba of course comes out with an American flag to hammer in the face status. The whole patriotism thing was a big deal in this feud as the third member of La Resistance, an American named Rob Conway, pretended to be a soldier to sneak up on the Dudleyz. It’s a brawl to start in the aisle with the challengers in full control.

D-Von chokes Dupree with the robe to start before armbarring Grenier down. A slam and a legdrop gets two on Sylvain and it’s off to Bubba for the power brawling. He puts Grenier in the Tree of Woe and stands on his crotch to make the French guy scream. The Dudleys clear the ring but Grenier gets in a cheap shot to give the champions control on Bubba. A double shoulder puts Bubba down for two as the USA chant starts up.

Back to Dupree for a bearhug, which isn’t often a move you see on a fat man like Bubba. Some headbutts break up hold but Bubba walks into a spinebuster for two. Bubba punches his way over to the hot tag (four minutes into the match) and D-Von cleans house. A rollup gets two on Grenier as everything breaks down. D-Von walks into a double spinebuster for two but it’s What’s Up to Dupree. The 3D lays out Dupree but Grenier makes save. Now a cameraman lays out D-Von with a camera to the head to retain the titles. It’s Rob Conway of course.

Rating: D+. That’s a pretty lame choice for an opener. Not only did the fans not get what they wanted but the match sucked as well. This was a dark time for the tag team division and there was no reason at all for there to be two sets of titles at this point. At the end of the day there wasn’t nearly enough depth and it made for lame matches like this. The Dudleys would get the belts next month.

Spike tries to run in for the save but Conway lays him out with the camera. Conway hasn’t been named here but I think the spoiler is ok at this point.

Coach says La Resistance was clever so Bubba accuses him of being anti-American and vows to get the belts back.

Eric Bischoff is warming up when Intercontinental Champion Christian comes up. He wants to know why he isn’t on the show but Bischoff blames Co-GM Steve Austin. Christian isn’t pleased but offers to be in Eric’s corner for his match later. Bischoff says he has his own plan and won’t answer what happens in the bedroom with Linda. Eric says he’ll tell everyone later.

We recap A-Train vs. Undertaker. A-Train (Tensai) is working for Vince who is in a semi-war with Taker, setting up tonight’s match. This would evolve into a bigger war soon enough.

Undertaker vs. A-Train

A-Train comes out with Vince’s mistress Sable and Undertaker has bad ribs. Feeling out process to start with A-Train grabbing a few headlocks for early control. Taker hits a quick Russian legsweep for two and he cranks on the arm to set up Old School. The second attempt works a bit better and Taker stays on the arm. A big boot misses and Taker falls out to the floor, reinjuring the ribs.

A-Train starts pounding away on the ribs and sends them into the barricade for two back in the ring. Taker gets in some shots to the ribs of his own for a breather but A-Train comes back with an impressive suplex to take him down. This is the kind of character A-Train was perfect as: a heavy who could do some impressive moves at times. A-Train fights out of a sleeper with a belly to back suplex but Taker hits a quick Snake Eyes to get a breather. A big boot misses the big bald head and a double clothesline puts each other down.

Taker wins a slugout after A-Train hung in there a lot longer than expected. Now the big boot sets up the legdrop (BROTHER) for two and another legdrop to the back of the head with A-Train on the apron has the bald one staggered. The Last Ride is easily broken up but the referee is bumped.

A-Train hits the Derailer (chokebomb) but the delayed count only gets two. Taker accidentally clotheslines the referee down again (the second match does NOT warrant two ref bumps) and A-Train brings in a chair, only to have it cracked over his own head for a near fall. A-Train escapes a tombstone but gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting out of this match? This was back when Taker was pretty bad in the ring due to being completely unmotivated and bored with the biker character. Thankfully he would be the Dead Man again by Wrestlemania and would eventually reignite his career around 2007.

Post match Sable tries to seduce Taker for some reason but Stephanie comes in to go after her, presumably setting up a mixed tag.

Coach polls some fans on who wins the Chamber.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff. Shane was feuding with Kane but Bischoff stopped them from fighting. Austin made Bischoff vs. Shane for that night but Kane interfered and cost Shane the match (he later tied Shane to the steps and electrocuted his testicles. It was stupid back then and it’s even worse now. This is what I had to deal with people).

Later, Bischoff caused JR to nearly be lit on fire, so Austin had to prevent a lawsuit by making Kane vs. Bischoff but Kane walked away for some reason, giving Bischoff the win by countout. This was a qualifying match for a Summerslam match with Kane, making our match tonight. Then Bischoff went to Linda’s house and pinned her arm behind her back and kissed her against her will.Think that’s enough to set up this match?

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Before the match, Eric implies that he screwed Linda several times over that night. This brings out Shane to send Eric into the corner for a beating. Crossface punches send Bischoff to the floor but Shane clotheslines him in the back of the head. Back to ringside and Shane breaks the referee’s count (sidebar: why doesn’t that happen when both guys are on the floor and one guy slides back in at the last second?) before kicking away at Shane even more.

Bischoff is sent into the announce table and stomped down, only to have Coach come in with a chair and turning heel by helping Bischoff. The referee says ring the bell but Bischoff makes it No DQ and falls count anywhere. Shane is sent into the steps for two as Coach is playing the enforcer here. He holds Shane as Bischoff tells the production truck to turn off JR and King’s microphones so Coach can do commentary.

Bischoff starts firing off kicks as Coach does the eternally annoying JR impersonation. This keeps going for awhile until Shane gets in a right hand, only to be dropped by a low blow from Coach. Cue Steve Austin who can’t fight unless physically provoked. Shane shoves Coach into Austin which is enough for the beating to begin. Austin and Shane stomp Coach down in the corner and clear the ring. Austin has the mics turned back on as Shane grabs Eric’s hand and uses it to slap Austin’s face, meaning Austin can Stun Bischoff. That’s not good enough or Shane so he puts Eric on the table for the big elbow for the pin.

Rating: N/A. This was a long segment instead of a match. Also to recap how stupid things were at this point, we’re supposed to be interested in Austin/Shane vs. Coach/Bischoff when Austin has equal power to Eric. We also have Stephanie vs. Sable, because EVERYONE wants to see the McMahons dominating the show. This is in addition to Evolution dragging Raw down the drain with the Kevin Nash and Goldberg feuds. See why 2003 is considered so bad?

Wrestlemania moment. Kind of an odd time for one of these but Shawn superkicking Bret was an awesome moment.

We see Kevin Nash getting ready. JR: “Nash is a street fighter at heart.” I haven’t laughed that hard in awhile.

Flair and HHH tell Orton to keep the title on the Game tonight and nothing more.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Eddie has ticked off all three challengers so they all want to take him out. The champion bails to the floor so everyone else can fight and we quickly get down to Rhyno vs. Benoit. Chris hooks a quick Crossface, drawing Eddie in for the save. Tajiri is back in as well but Eddie breaks up a cover. Everyone is in now and all three challengers go after Eddie at the same time.

Rhyno hits a running shoulder to Eddie’s ribs in the corner and powerslams him down for two but Benoit comes back with a German suplex. A belly to back gets two on Tajiri but Eddie makes another save. Benoit is suplexed to the floor and Eddie is left alone with Tajiri, only to have the challenger monkey flip Eddie down for two. Rhyno comes back in and sends Tajiri to the floor but Benoit wants to beat up Eddie himself, triggering a brawl between challengers.

Rhyno gets control again and superplexes Eddie down for two but Tajiri kicks him in the back of the head. Tajiri snaps off the handspring elbow for two on Chris but Rhyno sends Tajiri to the floor, only to have Eddie headscissor him out to the floor. Eddie hurricanranas Benoit out of the corner for two and it’s Tajiri in again for some hard kicks. Eddie hooks the Lasso From El Paso (Liontamer crossed with the Texas Cloverleaf) on Tajiri but Benoit stops Rhyno from making the save with the Crossface.

Tajiri makes the ropes so Eddie turns around to dropkick Benoit in the head for the save. Benoit grabs the Crossface on Guerrero but Rhyno and Tajiri make the double save. Rhyno hits a spinebuster for two on Tajiri but Benoit knocks Rhyno to the floor. Chris rolls some Germans on Tajiri but Tajiri reverses into one of his own for two on Benoit.

Tajiri catches a charging Benoit in the Tarantula and the distraction lets Eddie get the US Title to shield himself from Rhyno’s Gore. Tajiri breaks up the Frog Splash but gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Benoit Swan Dives Rhyno but Tajiri makes a last second save. Tajiri and Benoit fall to the floor and Eddie frog splashes Rhyno to retain.

Rating: B+. This was non-stop action for about eleven minutes and incredibly entertaining as a result. It’s a great example of how wrestling and action can be so much more interesting than whatever drama the McMahons have going on at the moment. Watching these four make save after save is WAY more fun than hearing about Bischoff forcing himself on Linda or Stephanie being FURIOUS with Sable over whatever affair her dad is having this month.

We recap Brock Lesnar destroying Zack Gowen on Smackdown (good for him). Lesnar had him COVERED in blood and rubbed the blood on his own chest. Gowen had his leg broken in two places so he couldn’t face Matt Hardy tonight. Matt declared himself the winner on Heat like a good heel would.

We recap Angle vs. Lesnar. Angle lost to Brock in the main event of Wrestlemania, leading to Vengeance where Angle pinned Lesnar in a three way to get the title back. The two of them became best friends and friendly rivals, leading to Brock wanting a rematch. Vince said no, but if Lesnar can beat Vince in a cage with Angle as referee, he can have the shot. Before the match, someone attacked Brock and laid him out with a concussion. Brock popped up and turned on Angle, revealing that he’s working for Vince as the new heavy and getting the title shot for tonight. Vince called this the REAL Brock Lesnar.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending of course. Brock shoves him in the corner to show off the power so Angle starts getting lower. They hit the technical stuff on the mat but Brock escapes into a standoff. Brock quickly takes him down with a headscissors but it’s Angle escaping to another stalemate. Lesnar shoves him around with the power so Angle leverages him into the corner and says bring it on. Some quick armdrags send Brock out to the floor and various things are destroyed in frustration.

Lesnar picks up the belt and tries to walk out with it but Kurt pounds him down in the aisle to start the brawling. Back in and Angle snaps off the first overhead belly to belly for two before stomping him down in the corner. Brock comes right back with a gorilla press and throws Angle out to the floor. Angle is sent into the steps as this is far different from the Wrestlemania match. Back in and Brock hits a release belly to belly without leaving his feet.

Angle slips out of another gorilla press and gets two off an O’Connor Roll, only to walk into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. We hit the rear naked choke on Angle which is turned into a bodyscissors. Angle fights up but runs into a knee to the ribs to put him right back down. Kurt is pounded into the corner but grabs a rollup for two, only to be clotheslined back down. The story of this match isn’t working as well as their first fight. This is much more of a traditional wrestling match with good vs. evil and that’s not what these two are best at.

Lesnar comes right back with something like a Muscle Buster for two, followed up by shoulders to the ribs in the corner. Brock sends him into the corner to stay on the ribs and back before firing off more shoulders in the corner. Angle finally moves to avoid a charge, sending Brock shoulder first into the post. A dropkick takes Brock’s knee out and Angle rolls some Germans for a close two. Brock comes back with an overhead belly to belly of his own but Angle pops up and tries the Slam, only to be countered into a spinebuster for a close two. The fans are into this match.

Angle counters an F5 into a DDT and both guys are down. A delayed cover gets two for the champion and there go the straps. The Angle Slam connects but Brock is up at two as per tradition. In one of my favorite moments, Angle puts the straps up so he can take them back down, firing himself up even more. There’s the ankle lock but Brock makes a rope. Angle pulls him back so the rope doesn’t count in a questionable call, so Lesnar rolls out, bumping the referee in the process.

Lesnar sends him into the corner and Angle tries a sunset flip but stops before going down, wrapping his legs around Brock’s neck in a choke before putting on another ankle lock. Lesnar eventually taps but there’s no referee so here’s Vince with a chair to Angle’s back to break the hold. Brock gets to his one good foot and hits a pretty awesome one legged F5 for a delayed two. Vince demands another F5 but Angle counters into the ankle lock. Brock grabs the rope but again Angle pulls him to the middle for no break. Brock grabs all four bottom ropes but the referee doesn’t break it, forcing Brock to tap out.

Rating: B. It’s a good match but the ending never worked for me. At the end of the day, if you touch the ropes the hold is supposed to be broken. That’s wrestling 101, but for some reason it doesn’t count at the end of this match. The match was good but it was overbooked when you have these two being able to own whatever ring they’re in. The Vince stuff was annoying but that’s what you have to expect in WWE.

Post match Vince tries to jump Angle again but gets Angle Slammed through a chair for his efforts. And on Vince’s birthday too.

Goldberg is listening to an iPod to get ready. That’s such a wrong image.

Some Arizona Diamondbacks are here.

We recap Kane vs. RVD. They had been friends and tag champions but Kane lost a match to HHH, forcing him to unmask. This unleashed Kane’s inner demons for the 10^th time or so, turning him into a psycho who lit JR on fire. Kane swore everyone was laughing at him even though RVD told him everything was fine. Kane beat up RVD in a match and tombstoned Linda McMahon on a stage to start his feud with Shane, leading to a rematch with Rob here tonight.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Fink says this is No Holds Barred. So does that make Kane Zeus? JR calls Kane an inbred mongrel dog, which isn’t that high up on his list of sayings. Van Dam fires off right hands to start but Kane takes him to the floor with a few uppercuts. Kane charges into a boot and gets kicked in the face to put the monster down. Kane easily slugs him down and pulls out a ladder. Van Dam manages to smash the end of it to drive the ladder into Kane’s face, only to have Rolling Thunder caught by the throat.

RVD kicks out of the chokeslam but gets knocked out to the floor as the brawl continues. Kane sends him into the steps and is in full on monster mode. Back in and Van Dam scores with a kick and some shoulders to the ribs for two. Rob goes up top but gets shoved down onto the barricade to give Kane control again. A ladder to the face gets two back in the ring and a big clothesline puts Van Dam down again.

We hit the slow motion part of the match as Kane pounds on Van Dam very slowly to stop the crowd from being interested. Van Dam is backdropped to the floor but Kane badly botches the top rope clothesline, nearly falling on his head and dying. Kane avoids another ladder shot and DDTs Van Dam on he floor, only to have Rob catch a charging Kane in a drop toehold to send him face first into the steps. Kane is kicked into the crowd and crotched as he tries to come back to ringside.

Van Dam’s spin kick off the apron puts Kane down again as this match just keeps going. Back in and Rolling Thunder onto the chair crushes Kane but Rob can’t follow up. Kane sits up but gets caught by a Van Daminator. Rob loads up the Van Terminator but Kane rolls away at the last second. They head to the floor and Kane tombstones Rob onto the steps, killing him dead for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was an ok brawl but it went on WAY too long. At the end of the day this was just a rest stop on the way to Kane vs. Shane next month which was probably the more interesting feud anyway. The match was Van Dam trying his best but not being able to keep Kane down. It certainly wasn’t a squash but it wasn’t many steps above one.

Eric is annoyed that Terri is asking him questions. Linda comes in and slaps Bischoff in the face.

HHH looks at the world title.

The Chamber is lowered.

We recap the world title match. There isn’t much to this other than HHH is injured and can’t fight Goldberg one on one so we get an Elimination Chamber instead. Goldberg is in for obvious reasons, Jericho and Nash have been feuding lately, Orton is there to give HHH a hand and Shawn is there for past issues with HHH. This gets the music video treatment, set to St. Anger by Metallica.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

After about 12 minutes of entrances we start with Shawn vs. Jericho, who will go for three minutes. After that time is up, a pod will open to release another wrestler. Three more minutes and another pod opens. This repeats until everyone is in and it’s last man standing wins. Eliminations can occur at any time and have to take place in the ring, not on the cage floor outside the ring next to the pods. They trade hammerlocks to start until Jericho rolls through a cross body for two.

They trade chain wrestling moves into a pinfall reversal sequence as the fans chant for Goldberg. Back up and Shawn slaps him in the face before backdropping him down. Jericho’s Walls attempt is countered into a small package for two but Jericho comes back with a bulldog to take Shawn down. JR screws up the world title continuity by saying the title has only changed hands once in Phoenix, but that’s the other world title. Not that it matters to WWE but they make such a big deal about the continuity that it’s worth pointing out.

Anyway Orton is #3 and gets two off a high cross to Shawn. Michaels is clotheslined to the cage floor but he comes back in to pound away on Jericho. Randy dropkicks him down and stomps Jericho down against the ropes but can’t RKO Shawn. Instead Orton is sent to the cage floor by a combined effort, only to have Jericho put Shawn in the Walls. Kevin Nash is in at #4 to make the save and go after Jericho as Shawn and Orton brawl in the ring. Jericho’s face is rubbed against the cage to give us our first blood.

Nash (with short blonde hair here for a movie) cleans house but walks into a superkick into a rollup for the pin by Jericho. Nash was in there about two minutes or so. HHH is #5 but Shawn superkicks him before he can get out of the pod to make sure the injured champion doesn’t have to do much. Nash lays out Jericho, Orton and Shawn with Jackknives, leaving everyone down for a massive dead spot. Shawn is busted as well.

They finally get back up to slug it out as JR talks about Oklahoma for no apparent reason. Here’s Goldberg at #6 to FINALLY wake the crowd up a bit. He cleans house and clotheslines Jericho and Shawn down before spearing Orton down for the pin, leaving us with four. Jericho hits a quick missile dropkick for two on Goldberg but he launches Chris into the cage to put him back down.

Goldberg sends Shawn into the corner before spearing Jericho through the glass pod. Goldberg is dazed though, allowing Shawn to drop the elbow to set up Sweet Chin Music. This is Goldberg though so the kick is blocked by a spear and the Jackhammer gets us down to three. A quick spear and Jackhammer to Jericho leaves us with HHH vs. Goldberg. HHH is still in the pod as he’s been in the match for about six minutes now and literally hasn’t done anything.

Flair shoves the pod door closed to save HHH so Goldberg kicks the pod door in so we can actually have a match. Goldberg pounds away in the pod before sending HHH face first into the cage. The champion is busted open but he FINALLY gets in a kick to the leg and sends Goldberg into the cage. Goldberg comes right back with a clothesline and they head into the ring. The spear is loaded up but hits the sledgehammer that Flair slid in, keeping the title on HHH.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work very well and the ending sums up everything wrong with Raw in 2003. The fans were primed for a Goldberg title win, HHH was injured and had no business being in the match anyway, Goldberg dominated the match, HHH literally hit two offensive moves in ten minutes of match time, but HHH uses the sledgehammer to retain the title. Yeah Goldberg got the title a month later, but THIS is the match people remember because THIS is the big show. HHH wins at the big show, the monster wins the next month at the B show. Does this sound familiar to fans in 2013?

As for the rest of the match, there’s nothing going on here. It’s less than twenty minutes long from bell to bell and the three minute intervals really hold this down. No one had time to do anything, making it more like the 1995 Rumble than anything else. It’s just not very good and the ending sucked whatever life it had out of the match. Again, 2003 Raw just wasn’t that good and this match sums up why.

Post match HHH and Evolution gets to destroy Goldberg again with the hammer to really pound in who is the star. Goldberg is handcuffed to the cage so HHH can shove the belt in his face and remind him who the champion is to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There’s some good stuff on here but the HHH factor drags it down again. I’ve said this a lot tonight but 2003 just wasn’t a good year overall. It’s a bunch of matches and feuds that people don’t want to see but we have the same McMahon nonsense over and over again because WWE is their playground and they can do whatever they like. Over on Raw HHH gets to keep the title FOREVER despite being hurt and having beasts like Benoit and Guerrero waiting in the wings to be the next guys. Did they pan out in the end? No, but at this point no one knew that was the case and HHH got the title as a result.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: C

Redo: D+

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: N/A

Tajiri vs. Rhyno vs. Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B-

Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: B

Rob Van Dam vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Goldberg vs. HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C

So I liked almost all of the matches more or the same the first time, but the overall rating is much higher this time. Not surprising.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $5 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books as low as $4 at:

Thunder
Date: March 12, 1998
Location: Riverside Centroplex, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan

It’s the final show before Uncensored and we’re limping into the pay per view. The show on Monday did very little to make me want to see Sunday’s show but hopefully tonight can pick things up a bit. I don’t remember anything being announced for tonight on Monday but I’m guessing it’ll focus on Hogan vs. Savage. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Giant to open the show. He wants Hogan and Nash but he wants to fight the entire NWO on his own tonight. Instead he gets Savage and Liz with Randy saying he likes the idea of Giant taking out Nash because it leaves Hogan all alone. Once Hogan is done, Savage wants his chance at the title. Cue Sting to say he’s the champion and he’ll defend the title tonight if Savage wants the shot. You know Macho isn’t turning that chance down.

Brad Armstrong vs. Raven

Raven offers to let Armstrong get out of the match before the beating begins. In 1980, Armstrong was rookie of the year and in 1981 he was half of the world tag team champions. Since then his career has fallen apart due to the Armstrong Curse. Raven understands Armstrong’s admiration for his father but thinks the bookers (his word) were jealous of Bob and are taking it out on Brad. He feels Brad’s pain and lays him out with the DDT. There’s the bell, Raven covers him for the pin and we’re done in about four seconds.

Here’s Chris Jericho with something to say. He’s on such a roll as of late and is feeling so good that he’s going to give Malenko a title shot tonight instead of waiting for Sunday. Jericho brags about his trophies such as Mysterio’s mask and his trophy tonight will be beating Dean with the Cloverleaf, which will then be named the Jericholeaf. Also, he knows 1004 holds. Oh it’s coming.

Jim Duggan vs. Kendall Windham

Duggan wins a quick slugout and scores with an atomic drop before they head outside. Kendall sends him into the post and barricade before heading back inside for a boot to the head. They slug it out again with Kendall slamming him down and putting on a chinlock, because THIS MATCH needs to keep going. Duggan fights up but walks into a clothesline, only to come back with a slam and the three point clothesline for the win. You know, for all those die hard Jim Duggan fans in 1998.

Scott Steiner vs. Johnny Grunge

Grunge brings a table but gets suckered into a right hand during a handshake. Johnny comes back with a hiptoss but walks into a belly to back suplex. Scott puts him in the Tree of Woe and pulls on the throat before going after the back. A bearhug makes Grunge scream but Johnny bites his way out of it.

Scott easily clotheslines him back down but runs into an elbow in the corner. Grunge gets a surprisingly close two off a neckbreaker but stops to look at his table from the apron. Johnny comes back by ramming Scott’s head into the buckle a few times but gets crotched coming back in. Scott knocks him through the table and puts the unconscious body in the Recliner for the win.

Rating: D. This wasn’t very good as you would expect. Steiner’s push as a heel continues to suck without the NWO there to make people care about him. It’s not helping him that Johnny Grunge is getting in offense on him and it takes a cheap shot for Scott to get the win. Another bad match here as Thunder devolves before my eyes.

Eddie Guerrero comes out and says he’ll win the TV Title on Sunday. However he’d rather talk about his nephew Chavo disgracing the Guerrero name. This brings out Chavo who wants to know why Eddie is on him all the time. Didn’t he just explain that? Anyway Chavo wants a match and Eddie agrees, but if Eddie wins then Chavo has to start listening to him. That’s fine, but if Chavo wins then Eddie has to start honoring the Guerrero name. The match is right now.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Chavo hits a quick clothesline to start and backdrops Eddie down. They’re moving very fast out there with Eddie taking over via some uppercuts before throwing Chavo to the apron. Chavo hangs on and Eddie charges into a headscissors to take him outside. A BIG plancha takes Eddie down and the fans love it. Back in and Chavo goes up top, only to be crotched on the ropes. Eddie loads up a superplex but Chavo counters into a tornado DDT for two. Uncle Eddie gets his foot on the ropes at two and stops Chavo with a low blow. The brainbuster sets up the frog splash for the pin. Too short to rate but this was good stuff.

Here are Bischoff and Hall to introduce Hogan. Bischoff is WAY too excited over Hogan’s arms. He calls the Giant the highest level of dumb: mega dumb. Hogan likes the idea of Giant vs. the entire NWO and they’re all wanting a piece of the big man. Hall, looking “under the weather” here, says Sting will have his hands full on Sunday and he’ll be watching the title match tonight. Hogan says the NWO will win tonight and on Sunday. No one had much to say here.

Konnan vs. Lizmark Jr.

Lizmark spins out of a quick snapmare attempt and they hit the mat for some technical stuff. Konnan gets bored and forearms Lizmark in the face before pulling on his pants a lot. Lizmark comes back with a shot to the ribs and a quick missile dropkick for a botched (Lizmark pulled up before Konnan kicked out or even moved at all) cover. Now the camera goes wide for some reason. It wasn’t that bad of a botch. Konnan rams him into the corner and gets a quick German suplex for two before finishing him with the 187 and the Tequila Sunrise. Another short match.

Post match Konnan goes for the mask but Juventud comes out for the save and takes the beating himself.

Here are Hennig and Rude with something to say. Rude talks about collecting a bounty from some people in Connecticut for taking out Bret Hart but now he’ll do it for free. Hennig admits that Bret is good, but there’s a big difference between good and great. Rude says they’ll make Bret sweat on Sunday.

Perry Saturn vs. Disco Inferno

Good night how many times did these two fight? Saturn takes him into the corner and hits some hard right hands to take over. A dropkick sends Disco to the outside but he decks Lodi instead of getting back inside. Back in and Inferno gets two on a sunset flip but gets thrown down with a pumphandle suplex.

A Falcon’s Arrow puts Disco down but Saturn jumps into a boot to the face for two. Another boot to the face with feet on the ropes gets two more but Saturn takes him down with a superkick. Disco reverses a whip into the corner into a spinebuster followed by a swinging neckbreaker for two. Not that it matters though as a head and arms suplex sets up the Rings of Saturn for the submission.

Rating: C. These two are at the point where they can have a decent match by familiarity alone. Disco didn’t look as good as he had recently but his hot streak couldn’t last forever. Saturn continues to be his odd but still great self. He’s another guy that had potential but was wasted once he got hot.

The Giant vs. NWO

It’s Hogan, Adams, Hennig, Hall, Norton, Konnan, Vincent and Steiner. Hall starts by throwing the toothpick and gets a headbutt and gorilla press slam as a result. Hennig comes in and tries to stick and move but gets thrown to the floor. Konnan comes in and gets powerbombed, meaning Giant is arrested to end the match. Nothing to see here.

Nash pops up as Giant is being led away. He throws coffee on Giant, causing the bigger man to break the chains and chase Nah off.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is in the Juvy mask and jumps Dean before the bell. He pounds on Dean in the corner and hits a delayed vertical for the arrogant cover minus the COME ON BABY! Dean comes back with some right hands and a leg lariat for two. A belly to back suplex sets up the Texas Cloverleaf for the submission in less than three minutes.

Dean keeps pounding away and takes off the mask….and it’s Lenny Lane. Jericho comes in from behind and hits Dean with the belt before knocking out Lane as well. Malenko is put in the Liontamer for good measure.

Lex Luger vs. Scott Norton

Norton gets in a cheap shot on the way in and knocks Luger to the floor. Luger is sent into the barricade and the side of the ring before Norton takes him back inside for a flying shoulder block. A clothesline puts Luger down for two but here’s the comeback with the forearms and atomic drops. He loads up the Rack but Scott Steiner comes in for the fast DQ.

Rick Steiner makes the save and the WCW guys stand tall.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Randy Savage

Savage jumps him to start and they slug it out with Sting still in the trench coat. Sting hits a quick atomic drop and drops Savage across the top rope. There’s the Scorpion but Hall comes in for the quick DQ.

Hogan comes in as well but leaves a few seconds later to bring in the troops. The good guys fight off the goons and Sting calls for something. A cable comes down from the ceiling and they hook up to fly into the rafters to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was hit and miss all night long. The main matches combining to be about five minutes long didn’t help but we covered a lot of stuff for Sunday. It still comes off as a total filler pay per view but after all the big shows we’ve had lately they have to take a breather at some point. The NWO stuff was really dull though as it was like a teaser trailer instead of a full on preview for you movie people out there.

Here’s Uncensored if you’re interested:

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $5 at:

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Monday Nitro #130
Date: March 9, 1998
Location: Lawrence Joel Memorial Veterans Coliseum, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

It’s the go home show for Uncensored and the card is almost entirely set. Tonight is going to be about finalizing everything for Sunday with the focus likely being on Savage vs. Hogan instead of Sting vs. Hall. Other than that there might be some time spent on Page vs. Benoit vs. Raven but it’s going to pale in comparison to Age in the Cage. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Thunder of Savage saying he’s the real man and Hogan’s wife knows it. Hogan freaking out over possibly being thrown out of the NWO is a nice bit of storytelling.

The announcers hype up the show and Larry gets a very nice response from the crowd.

Ernest Miller vs. Damien

Damien is unmasked here which I don’t think was always the case, although it might have been face paint. Miller is in shorts instead of his usual attire and it’s a striking contest to start things off. Damien puts him on the middle rope for a hurricanrana but dives into a kick to the chest. Miller runs up the ropes and hits a spin kick to the face for a quick pin. This was an odd choice for an opener but the kick to end it looked great.

Here are Bischoff and Hogan with something to say. Eric sucks up to Hogan, saying that no one will ever be half of what Hogan is now. However, Bischoff wants to talk about ingrates like Randy Savage. If it wasn’t for Hogan, Savage’s family would be out of a job and out on the street, so it’s now time for Savage to pay the price. Hogan talks about Savage dragging Liz into this business and implies she did everyone in the locker room. That draws a big gasp from the crowd. Hogan goes on about how great he is until it’s time to pose.

Gene is at Duke University with the Nitro Girls.

Lenny Lane vs. Sick Boy

Lane’s music starts when he’s halfway down the aisle. Lenny hits some basic stuff to start but the much taller Sick Boy comes back with some right hands. Lodi has the words Go Heels on his back. Lane dives over the top to take both Flock members down and gets two off a missile dropkick back inside. Sick Boy comes back with a layout F5 and some right hands to the head.

A running elbow in the corner puts Lane down but he avoids a top rope elbow. Lane gets a rolling cradle for two followed by something resembling a Skull Crushing Finale. Back up and Lane horribly botches a standing Lionsault, making it more like a springboard back clothesline. There was no rotation at all and they’re lucky Lane didn’t land on his head. Thankfully Sick Boy rolls over Lane’s back and hits a quick Pedigree (the Cure) for the pin.

Rating: D. Lane was trying but he was in over his head with the moves he was going for. Sick Boy’s size got in his way here as he wasn’t able to do much against the much smaller Lane. The match would have been better with a better pairing, but with the two guys we had it was bordering on a disaster.

Here’s Giant, still in a neck brace, with something to say. Giant has been looking for Kevin Nash to get a head start on Sunday’s match but he’s nowhere in sight. He mentions having buddies, which brings out Savage and Sting, FINALLY holding the belt. Savage says he doesn’t feel alone because Giant is about 8,000 feet tall and Sting is the world champion. Sting beats on the ropes with the bat as Savage challenges Hogan and any other two guys from the NWO to a six man tonight.

Goldberg vs. Barry Darsow

Darsow is more famous as Smash from Demolition or Repo Man. He’s just Barry Darsow, guy in trunks here though. Goldberg immediately takes him down by the leg before running Barry over with a shoulder block. A lariat sends Darsow to the floor and Goldberg rams him into the barricade and post. Goldberg misses a shoulder into the post though and Darsow goes after the arm. The arm is sent into the buckle but Goldberg snaps awake and hits the spear and Jackhammer for the quick pin.

Gene is still at Duke University.

Here’s Hall with something to say. There’s no survey tonight, because he needs to talk about Savage running down Hogan. If Hollywood needs him, Hall is in his corner tonight. As for Sting, Hall will prove he’s better on Sunday. Thanks for throwing in something about your first WCW World Title shot. Nash comes out and says he’ll have Hogan’s back as well and Giant will get what’s coming to him too.

Dean Malenko vs. Kidman

Dean quickly takes him down and tries the Cloverleaf but Kidman rolls to the ropes. A dropkick gets two for the itchy one and he kicks Malenko in the head a few times. Dean misses a dropkick and it’s off to a chinlock. Kidman shoves Malenko chest first into the buckle and stomps him down in the corner in a surprising show of aggression. A slingshot legdrop gets two on Dean and a middle rope bulldog gets the same. Here’s Jericho to watch Malenko as Kidman slams Dean down for two. Kidman goes up top but gets caught in the middle rope gutbuster. The Cloverleaf is good for the submission.

Rating: C. Not bad here and the gutbuster is always cool to see. Jericho didn’t really do anything here but his presence alone is usually entertaining. Dean is a great foil for Jericho with the serious vs. goofy natures battling each other. Kidman is good but he’s almost playing his gimmick too well as the lack of interest makes for less than thrilling matches.

Jericho and the Flock gets in to stare down Malenko but the Flock beats Jericho down instead. Chris and Dean escape separately.

Here are Hogan and Bischoff with something else to say. Bischoff says Hogan has had to draw straws to pick his partners. Hogan talks about Savage being cool with the NWO for a long time before everything fell apart. The NWO is better than ever without Savage though, which brings us to tonight. Hogan has picked Hall and Nash as his partners (shocking) because they would never stab him in the back. This didn’t need to be done in the arena.

More Gene and the Nitro Girls. Are these segments supposed to be interesting?

Bryan Adams vs. Kaos

From Bret Hart to this for Adams, which is much more appropriate for a guy of his caliber. Adams jumps Kaos to start and lays him out with a quick piledriver. A kick to the shoulder puts Kaos down again and a gutbuster gets two. I’m leaving out the walking around between each move to avoid redundancy. Kaos comes back with a jawbreaker and a clothesline for two before his partner Rage goes up top. Adams fights Kaos off with ease and kicks Rage down before hitting a tilt-a-whirl slam on Kaos for the pin.

Rating: D. WAY too long here with Adams showing how limited his offense is at this point. That flat out shouldn’t be the case for someone with the kind of experience that he has. Adams didn’t look good out there other than the tilt-a-whirl finisher, but at least it was against a jobber and not anyone of value. Also what was up with High Voltage trying to double team like that? It came off like Adams was the good guy fighting off cheaters here.

Post match Adams hits the tilt-a-whirl on Rage for a pin as well.

Here’s Konnan who talks a lot of trash about Juventud Guerrera and says he has an opponent for him of the same size and weight. If Juvy can beat this guy, he can have a match against Konnan.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Scott Norton

Juvy tries to dive on Norton and just bounces off. Chops have no effect either and we head inside. Norton launches him into the air for a great looking crash. Guerrera comes back with a missile dropkick but a springboard spinwheel kick is caught into a backbreaker. Off to a bearhug followed by a full nelson to make Juvy scream. Guerrera will not give up and Norton lets him go, only to hit the shoulder breaker for the pin.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of this? Juvy can’t beat a guy he shouldn’t be able to beat and Konnan gets to laugh a lot? Guerrera not giving up was a nice idea, but having him destroyed by a shoulder breaker a few seconds later doesn’t make him look that great. This didn’t do much for anyone.

Video on Raven vs. Page vs. Benoit.

Chris Benoit/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Perry Saturn/Raven

This should be good. Benoit and Saturn slug it out to start and Perry gets two off a northern lights suplex. Chris takes him into the corner and makes the tag off to Page for a swinging neckbreaker. Raven gets the tag but Benoit tags himself in before Page can get himself a piece. Benoit runs Raven over and Saturn is knocked to the floor as well as we take a break.

Back with Page being double teamed in the corner….which has switched for some reason. As in the teams have switched corners during the break. Raven snaps Page’s throat across the ropes for two but Page comes back with a sunset flip. No count though as Benoit is making a save, allowing Raven to put on a front facelock. Page fights his way over to Benoit but the referee is with Saturn so it’s no good. Saturn comes in for a bearhug on the bad ribs which lasts for a good long while.

Page finally breaks free but Saturn trips him up, allowing Raven to stop the tag. A great looking guillotine legdrop gets two for Saturn but an elbow drop misses, allowing for the hot tag off to Benoit. The Canadian cleans house but Raven breaks up the Rolling Germans with a low blow. The Evenflow is countered into the Crossface but Page Diamond Cuts Saturn onto Benoit to break the hold. Page and Benoit get in a fight and brawl to a countout.

Rating: B. For once this is the right ending as it builds up to the PPV match perfectly well. This was a really solid tag match which followed the formula to perfection and had the fans losing their minds for the hot tag. It’s another example of what should be the first rule of wrestling: when things start to go bad, have a good wrestling match and things will get better in a hurry.

Goldberg and Disco Inferno went to Duke University hospital earlier today.

Gene gets some Dominos Pizza as the Girls keep dancing.

Hour #3 begins.

Konnan vs. British Bulldog

Konnan starts a USA chant in a funny bit. The Bulldog rolls and spins out of a wristlock and hooks a chinlock a minute into the match. Konnan fights up and takes Bulldog down with a clothesline and a back elbow to the jaw for two. A low dropkick gets two on the Bulldog before he gets up and…..rolls himself up for two? Bulldog was the one doing the move but rolled onto his shoulders with his feet in the air before kicking out. Odd indeed. Anyway Konnan comes off the ropes but walks into a horrible powerslam for the pin by Bulldog. This was really, REALLY bad while it lasted.

Here’s Flair and remember we’re in North Carolina. Flair talks about how the last time he was in this city, Curt Hennig slammed a cage door on his head. This time though, it’s Hennig’s turn to take a beating. Tonight Hennig will be Carolina Dreaming. Flair didn’t have much to say here.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho grabs a headlock to start but Disco takes him down with a hiptoss. Disco sends him over the top and out to the floor but Jericho blocks an ax handle from the apron with a dropkick to the ribs. Back in and Disco gets two off a sunset flip but the champ drops him throat first across the top rope. Disco catches a charging Jericho in something like a spinebuster for two. A swinging neckbreaker gets a VERY close two but Jericho comes right back with the double underhook backbreaker and the Liontamer retains the belt.

Rating: C. This was better than I was expecting with Disco continuing to impress in the ring. Jericho was playing it straight tonight and came up with a decent match as a result. The match with Malenko on Sunday is getting overlooked for some reason but it should be good as well. Nice match here.

Remember how Gene was at Duke University with the Nitro Girls? He’s still there.

TV Title: Booker T vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Eddie follows Chavo out and tries to talk some reason into him before the match. Booker yells at Eddie, allowing Chavo to get in a cheap shot before the bell. A dropkick to the leg takes Booker down but Eddie has the referee during the cover. Booker hits the spin kick to take Chavo down but the ax kick mostly misses. The missile dropkick is good for a quick pin for Booker in an abrupt ending.

Post match Eddie gives Chavo a brainbuster for losing.

Curt Hennig vs. Ric Flair

Before the match, Flair tells Hennig and Rude that he’s going to do this for every Horseman ever. Flair hits a quick hiptoss to send Curt to the floor and the fans freak out. Back in and Curt fires off some chops before sending Flair out to the floor for a beating from Rude. Ric gets back in and slugs it out with Flair knocking Hennig down to the mat. A low blow has Hennig in even more trouble and Flair brings in a chair. He puts Hennig in the Tree of Woe and picks up the chair but the NWO runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere but Ric in North Carolina is always worth a look. Flair vs. Hennig had gone on for months and then just stopped cold for the sake of a DDP vs. Hennig match at Starrcade. It’s good to see them bring things up again but the fire was gone at this point.

Post match the NWO runs in for the beatdown but Bret makes the save.

Scott Steiner/Scott Norton vs. Rick Steiner/Lex Luger

For the sake of simplicity, Scott Steiner will only be called Scott, Scott Norton will only be called Norton and Rick Steiner will only be called Rick. Rick comes out with a bulldog (Heenan: “He brought his sister!”) and chases off the NWO before the bell. We start with Rick vs. Norton and the NWO member being thrown down with a belly to belly. Scott bails to the floor from a glare from his brother and it’s Luger coming in with an ax handle to Norton’s shoulder.

Off to Scott who is run over by a few clotheslines and it’s time for the brothers to fight but Scott bails to the corner. Norton runs over Rick and it’s finally time for Scott to come in and pound away. Rick gets in a single right hand to the ribs and Scott bails to the corner. A backdrop puts Norton down but Scott breaks up the Steiner Bulldog. Luger beats Scott up the aisle and apparently it’s a double countout despite not hearing the count at all.

Rating: D+. This was storyline development as we build towards the eventual Steiner showdown. Luger and Scott have a match on Sunday which was barely mentioned here but at least they fought to end things. Norton was the odd man out and I’m not sure why they had him work twice tonight.

Hollywood Hogan/Outsiders vs. Sting/Randy Savage/The Giant

Thankfully Sting actually wears the belt again. Giant is in a neck brace and street clothes but goes after Nash anyway. It’s a big brawl to start with the three pairs fighting all over the arena. Sting and Hogan get things going with the champion pounding away and getting two off a right hand. Hogan sends him into a few corners and hits Sting in the back but the champion blocks a ram into the corner to get control back. Hall and Nash have their arms stretched out but Hogan doesn’t seem interested in tagging.

Giant gets the tag and Hogan staggers away, falling right into Nash which counts as a tag. Hall and Hogan try to jump Giant from behind but he picks both of them up AT THE SAME TIME in a double bearhug. That guy is so strong it’s unreal. Nash breaks it up though and Giant is in trouble. The NWO goes after Giant’s bad neck and the beating goes on for a good while. Hogan puts on a front facelock but can’t get the brace off.

Sting finally comes in without a tag to give Giant a breather but the brace has been removed. A triple beatdown has Giant in trouble but he shoves all three guys down and makes the hot tag to Savage. Giant gets back up and Nash runs off as Savage pounds on Hogan. Sting and Hall finally have some contact with the champion hitting a few Stinger Splashes before they fight to the floor. In the melee the Disciple comes in with the Stunner on Savage to give Hogan the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match but it was much more hype than actual substance. I’ll let the shock of a Nitro main event fitting that description sink in for a minute. Anyway the Sting vs. Hall match continues to be given less attention than even the TV Title match but any other solution might take some of the spotlight of Hogan vs. Savage and we couldn’t have that.

Overall Rating: C. This is an interesting show as they covered most of if not all the matches for Sunday but I really don’t care to see the PPV. At the end of the day the card just isn’t all that good and the Hogan vs. Savage issue does nothing for me. A lot of the other matches sound ok but not good enough to want to watch the show. The wrestling on here was ok but the storylines that dominated things dragged it down.

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Superbrawl Revenge
Date: February 18, 2001
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 4,395
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

It’s the final show in this trilogy that I’m doing as we wrap up Superbrawl thankfully with them cutting the numbers out. The main event here is Steiner vs. Nash in a 2/3 falls retirement vs. title match so take a guess who’s losing. Other than that the matches are at least different than the other matches we’ve seen in the previous two months. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of what would probably be a criminal or a psycho cutting out letters to make the word revenge. Yeah let’s get on with this.

Tony isn’t sure if Nash is here or not.

We get a clip from earlier in the day as Animal jumped Kidman to take him out of the opening match.

??? vs. Shannon Moore vs. Kaz Hayashi vs. Yun Yang vs. Evan Karagis vs. Jamie Knoble

This is a 4 corner 6 man elimination match. In other words you have two in the ring and one in every corner and it’s tagging in and out in an elimination match. We get a clip of Knoble and Karagis qualifying beating a team called Air Raid. That team was comprised of Air Paris and Air Styles. Styles started going by his initials: A.J. You may have heard of him and yes, he was in WCW for awhile. The entrances take forever and the replacement is Shane Helms, making it ANOTHER combination of these six.

This isn’t for a title or anything other than bragging rights as far as I can tell. For some reason Shane being the partner is SHOCKING even though there are two other teams in there. Knoble and Moore start us off. Oh apparently the winner gets a title shot at Greed. Knoble can’t get a tombstone so they slug it out instead. Belly to back gets two for Knoble. Shane tags himself in to face Jamie and 3 Count gets some double teaming to take Jamie down but not out.

Everything breaks down and Moore is sent crashing to the floor. The Dragons take out 3 Count with stereo Asai Moonsaults. The Dragons beat on Knoble a bit now but Karagis takes Yang out with a springboard cross body. Yang and Knoble speed things WAY up and Knoble gets a neckbreaker for two. Knoble brings in Karagis and it turns into a brawl. Full nelson slam puts Yang down and Evan hammers away a bit but hurts himself on a back splash.

Shane comes in and beats the tar out of both Karagis and Yang. Yang grabs a rollup for two but Shannon makes a blind tag and some double teaming takes down Yang. Scott forgets that this is elimination because he’s not that intelligent. Everything breaks down and Kaz pops Helms only to get jumped by Evan. Shane gets a superplex to Kaz and everyone misses dives off the top in a cool looking sequence.

The tagging stuff has been thrown completely out at this point. 3 Count gets a sweet double teaming move to Kaz as Shane dives all over the place. Now Kaz gets a huge spinning dive as does everyone else. Karagis gets a big spinning spinebuster to Yang and then does his driving the Cadillac and talking on the cell phone taunt. Knoble and Karagis argue over who should pin Yang because they’re not very intelligent.

Yang botches what looked like a Lionsault and slips off the ropes. He settles for a neckbreaker to put out Karagis. Tombstone to Yang by Knoble gets rid of the future Resident Redneck seconds later. Knoble sends Moore flying to the floor and it’s Helms vs. Knoble at the moment. Moore gets a Fameasser off the top on Knoble and we have Moore, Helms and Kaz yet.

3 Count double teams Kaz as you would expect them to do. Moore gets a backslide and Helms adds a leg drop to Kaz’s exposed neck. That’s INSANE when you think about it. Samoan drop/neckbreaker combination kills Kaz but they don’t go for a cover. Moore grabs a Fameasser on Helms to be a jerk for two but Kaz kicks him for no apparent reason and hits the referee at the same time. Do they not realize this is ELIMINATION???

Helms beats on Moore but takes a low blow to put him down. Kaz and Moore beat on Helms before fighting each other. Kaz sets for a moonsault but Moore pushes Helms out of the way so that Kaz crashes. Nightmare on Helm Street takes Moore out and we’re down to Kaz vs. Helms. They fight over suplexes with Kaz getting a German for two (make your own international jokes). Top rope sunset flip by Helms is reversed into a BIG swinging kick by Kaz for two. They grapple a bit more and Helms gets a Vertebreaker to end this finally.

Rating: B-. The match ran nearly 20 minutes which made it feel long. Also the people not seeming to grasp the rules at various points hurt it a lot also. Good match and fun but the ending was never really in danger. And of course these people would keep feuding until WCW went out of business because having the best matches in the company wasn’t worth being advanced right?

We see security camera footage of Flair and Animal talking when Chavo comes up to them which would imply that Chavo put a hit out on Kidman.

General Rection says he brought the Wall into MIA and made him awesome. The Wall has joined Chavo now and attacked the remaining Misfits. This is Hugh Morrus though, not General Rection. Ok then.

Flair comes in to talk to Steiner who says this is about the future and hands him an envelope which he says contains Nash’s future.

Kronik talks to Lance Storm who is now Commissioner. Clark is hurt apparently but has been cleared. If he isn’t cleared by the company doctor he can wrestle. Adams can’t go with him.

Hugh Morrus vs. The Wall

Wall turned on Morrus and beat him up at various times so now it’s the big fight. Morrus tries to shove the referee out of the way and gets beaten down with ease instead. We hear about new ownership which is a real thing that was supposed to be done by Bischoff and his investment group, but that fell through due to Nitro and Thunder being canceled.

We head to the floor quickly and Wall is sent into the barricade. Wall is rammed into the steps and the steps are rammed into Wall. Well at least it’s even. Morrus picks up the steps and drops them on Wall as it’s ALL Morrus here. The fans want tables as we head back into the ring. Top rope elbow gets no cover. Morrus runs into a big boot and they’re both down.

Wall gets a hand on Morrus for two and then chops away in the corner. He gets on the ropes and tries a sleeper that would be like a hangman’s noose but Morrus gets a jawbreaker, despite the jaw and shoulder not colliding at all. Top rope legdrop by Wall misses and both are down again. Spinebuster by Morrus puts both guys down again. Am I watching a reenactment of Taker vs. HHH from Mania 26?

Low blow by Morrus and he fails at a hot shot so he chokes away a bit. They do the hot shot again which is stupid but that’s a lecture for a different time. This one connects for two though so it’s not like it matters. And they’re down again. I’m really starting to think Taker and HHH studied this before their match in 2011. Pancake hits and they’re both down AGAIN. The opening was good but dang man. Did they forget their naps earlier?

Hudson talks about them leaving everything in the ring and that’s why this is called Revenge. What in the world does that have to do with Revenge? Shouldn’t that be called Superbrawl: Never Quit or something like that? Piledriver can’t connect for Wall so Morrus gets a backdrop to put them both…..you know what I’m going to say so I’ll save you the time here. They slug it out from their knees as Hudson says this isn’t wrestling. Wow they were ahead of their time in WCW. German suplex to the Wall. Shouldn’t it be a Berlin suplex? No Laughing Matter (moonsault) ends this.

Rating: D. Good opening part but after that it went too long and got sloppy. Also, WAY too much laying around out there which hurt the match a lot. This should have been cut down by about 3-4 minutes and it would have gotten a lot better. Morrus was better than given credit for but he wasn’t a miracle worker.

Konnan tries to go see Flair but brawls with Animal instead.

We recap the tag title match which is between two teams of Natural Born Thrillers. They’ve broken up recently over one pair trying to help the other and failing. There was talk of jealousy and all that jazz. Oh and one carried the other. You can fill in the details yourself I think.

Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo vs. Mark Jindrak/Shawn Stasiak

Stasiak makes fun of the Titans, the NFL team in town, to establish his team as the heels. Palumbo and O’Haire have the title here. Big brawl to start and it’s hard to keep track of. Stasiak and O’Haire are your starters. Stasiak is all fired up here and hammers away with clotheslines for two. Konnan has been thrown out of the building by Flair. Off to Jindrak who is caught in a hot shot which mostly hits.

Palumbo comes in with that awesome right hand of his. They’re tagging in and out very fast here. The champions do the Haas/Benjamin jump over the guy and land on the opponent’s back move to Jindrak. Jindrak was probably the weakest of these four. Well maybe not as long as Stasiak was in there. Palumbo gets a weird move to Jindrak. Think of a hiptoss but when he lifts Jindrak in the air he falls backwards on him. That was kind of cool actually.

The challengers get O’Haire down for some Horsemen stomping. Arn and Tully they’re not though as Palumbo hammers them both but can’t get a DDT. Double kip up by the challengers and stereo elbows as Palumbo plays Ricky Morton. Bulldog by Stasiak gets two and it’s off to Jindrak again who also gets two. O’Haire is all fired up on the apron as he has to watch his partner get double teamed.

Stasiak gets a clothesline for two and it’s off to Jindrak again. Off to the chinlock now as Jindrak continues to be incredibly dull in the ring. Sean finally pops in without a tag to drill Jindrak which gets him nowhere. Stasiak comes back in and throws on an armbar. Small package by Palumbo for two. Tilt-a-whirl gets two for Jindrak and it’s back to Stasiak.

He goes up top and misses a splash by a mile. The tips of his feet would have missed Palumbo by about a foot anyway. Jawbreaker by Palumbo and it’s off to O’Haire for a big pop. He clotheslines everyone and after a brief beatdown, a pair of superkicks from the champions sets up a Sean-ton Bomb to end it. His is better than Hardy’s as he hits more with his shoulders than his back and it looks awesome.

Rating: C+. They worked the formula here and had a good match, but it felt rushed for some reason. The problem here is that they all look similar and they all have a very similar style and it got a bit dull after awhile. O’Haire was clearly the top guy out there and of course in WWE he was probably featured the least. Typical.

Dustin Rhodes says his family doesn’t like Flair’s Family. Tonight it’s him vs. Rick Steiner because WCW isn’t that intelligent.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey comes out in a boxer’s robe throwing shadow punches. I give up. Animal has been helping Chavo for no adequately explored reason. Rey has horns on his head, overalls and a big cross around his neck. Oh and no mask. How did they manage to screw up Rey Mysterio? Dropkick puts Chavo on the floor but he can’t get a dive. Chavo gets back in and tries a sunset bomb but takes a rana to send him to the concrete.

Rey gets draped over the top rope for two as Chavo takes over. Superplex is blocked by Rey but he gets crotched on the top rope and lands in the Tree of Woe. After some dropkicks to the ribs, Chavo tries what can be called a spear but Rey gets out of the way, sending Chavo’s arm into the post. Rey can’t capitalize and winds up in the Gory Special. That’s always a cool move to see Chavo bust out.

Rey escapes quickly as Chavo tries to get it back on but shifts over to a Gory Bomb which is like a flapjack but with Rey being on Chavo’s back to start. Out to the floor now with Chavo in full control. Back in the ring and Rey tries a springboard moonsault press but Chavo catches him. Rey sends him into the corner but gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to end that flurry.

STF by Chavo. Odd though as I can still see him. Rey escapes, only to be sent out to the floor one more time. Sorry for the lack of jokes here but Chavo was so good at this point that he more or less didn’t have bad matches. Chavo sends him knee first into the steps and the challenger is in trouble. Before he throws Rey back in, Chavo steals a fan’s Rey mask and puts it on Rey, which would more or less get him shot in Mexico.

Chavo goes up, only to get crotched which brings him right back down. Rey puts the mask on Chavo and “hits” an awful rana for two. The champion gets sent to the floor and grabs the title, apparently to leave. Rey counters with a slingshot seated senton to take over even further. In the ring he tries what appears to be a Lionsault but falls flat on his back off the ropes. Lot of botching by Rey tonight.

Chavo goes to the floor again and grabs a chair. The knee gets smacked and Chavo gets a hot shot out of an electric chair. Rey gets back up and takes over but doesn’t look right still. He tries a big springboard move but falls AGAIN. Who does he think he is, Sin Cara? Rey sends him into the ring and gets a falling headbutt for two. DDT sets up the Bronco Buster. Rey picks up the chair from earlier which is taken away by the referee. Chavo grabs another chair and pops him with it. Brainbuster ends it with Chavo retaining.

Rating: B. And that’s mainly due to Chavo. Rey was WAY off here and it’s probably the worst performance I’ve ever seen out of him. Chavo was incredible at this point though so it was no big deal for him to carry the match. Good stuff overall and I liked the heel ending from the heel champion. Good match here with a great old school flavor to it.

Storm, the Commissioner for the month, changes the order of the matches and Brian Adams isn’t happy with it.

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Rick Steiner. Dustin came back and Flair wanted him in the Magnificent Seven but he turned it down. Nash kidnapped Flair’s son and said give Rhodes a match with Steiner or else. Dustin beat Steiner and got reinstated plus a US Title shot here.

US Title: Rick Steiner vs. Dustin Rhodes

Just let it sink in that this is the midcard title match in 2001. We hear about Goldberg but he’s gone at the moment. Dustin jumps Steiner as he comes in and we’re ready to go. Rick is absolutely worthless at this point and wouldn’t sell at all but he used to be a big star so here he is. Steiner ducks a cross body and Dustin goes flying out to the floor to give Rick his first advantage.

Steiner Line gets two and is followed by knees to the head. Belly to belly gets two and we hit an awful chinlock. Dustin does the standard escape out of it but misses an elbow. Half crab goes on and this is horribly boring. Apparently Steiner is taking Dustin’s soul here. Off to another chinlock because the fans were starting to care a bit.

Dustin fights up again and Dustin hammers away with various stuff including a clothesline for two. Bulldog hits and Rick hits the floor. Into the announce table and Dustin grabs a chair. The referee tells him not to as he takes the role of babysitter. Steiner takes the turnbuckle pad off and a hot shot puts Dustin into it. Steiner covers him and puts his feet on the ropes to end it.

Rating: D-. Rick Steiner gets a singles push in 2001. This is what people talk about when they say stupid booking with old guys getting pushed too much. I mean let’s see. Who do you have to be US Champion here? Any of the Thrillers, Storm, Awesome, Kidman, Mysterio, Chavo, you get the point. Match was awful too.

Dustin gives him Shattered Dreams post match.

Flair comes up to Storm and says he wants Dustin and everyone else not on their team out of the building after their matches. Also Kronik vs. Totally Buff is now a #1 contenders match.

Miller and Page are getting ready for Storm.

Totally Buff vs. Kronik

Wow that sounds like a pair of indy teams if I’ve ever heard one. The fans chant for Goldberg and Totally Buff says he was fired. They run their mouths for awhile longer and we’re told that Brian Clark hasn’t been released to wrestle yet. So it’s a handicap match now with Adams fighting both of them. Oh never mind there he is. The lights are still out for the entrance though and we can’t see Clark. Yeah we know what’s coming so just get to it.

Clark is put down by a chair shot so it’s a handicap match anyway. Adams gets a terrible double DDT but can’t get a full nelson slam on Luger due to a low blow. Off to Bagwell and we begin the standard double teaming and tagging in and out by the heels. Other than that double DDT it’s been all heels here. Camel clutch by Luger and he poses a bit. Luger jumps up and down on his back a few times but gets caught in a double knee to the Package’s package.

Bagwell goes down also and it’s off to Adams in control. He fires away with basic stuff that doesn’t really get him anywhere. Totally Buff sets for a double team Blockbuster but Adams fights off Luger’s shoulders and gets a belly to back suplex to take him down. You know, if Bagwell had actually, I don’t know, DONE SOMETHING OTHER THAN STAND ON THE ROPES AND WATCHED, Adams might not have been able to take over like that.

Anyway we get an attempted full nelson slam to Bagwell but Clark apparently turns on Adams and drills him. Ah but it’s a ruse and it’s Mike Awesome in Clark attire with a wig. Why is that the case you ask? No one knows, but my guess would be because it makes no sense and makes Awesome even more worthless than he was before. Rack and the Blockbuster ends Adams quickly.

Rating: D. Hey what do you know? It’s a pointless match that isn’t any good with a screwy ending that makes no sense. Who in the world would have seen that coming? Awesome continues to be completely wasted (no match tonight) and again, NO ONE CARES ABOUT LUGER AND BAGWELL!!! Terrible match….again.

Adams and the real Clark are thrown out of the building, but they beat up security first anyway.

Lance Storm vs. The Cat

Winner is the Commissioner because we need two authority figures right? Cat comes out to interrupt the national anthem and they compete for cheers. Just get to the boring match. They trade wristlocks to start with Storm taking over and getting booed. The announcers talk about how Cat is the only person standing in the way of Flair having total power in WCW. If that’s the case, why would Flair allow him to have this match?

Cat gets a kick and sends Storm to the floor where he walks around for awhile. We hear that Nash isn’t here tonight again to try to build up even more drama. Storm pulls Cat to the floor and takes over as this isn’t much at all. Tony gets on Storm for being a heel saying “that’s our commissioner?” Yes, we clearly need the guy in the tiger print jumpsuit that says SOMEBODY CALL MY MAMA on the back of it.

Storm works on the knee as we’ve been on the floor for about a minute now. Cat tries to make his comeback but Storm keeps working on the knee as we’re finally back in the ring. Storm proves that he works for Flair as he goes up, only to get slammed off the top. Back to the floor again and Storm wraps the knee around the post some more.

Miller blocks a sunset flip and does that stupid crotch chop of his before his dancing elbow drop. Storm catches the Feliner and puts on the Maple Leaf for a few seconds. Miller makes his comeback with what else? Kicks of course. Here comes Mike Sanders, only to get taken out by Ms. Jones. Feliner and Miller is Commissioner again.

Rating: D+. This would be between D+ and D but Jones looks good so we’ll give it the benefit of the doubt. The stips were stupid and the match was boring but you can’t ask Storm to be a miracle worker in there. I think this would be the last Commissioner changing of the guard but does anyone really care?

We recap Jarrett vs. Page which involves Kanyon somehow. They don’t like each other and that’s about it.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Miller has been thrown out of the building also. His powers don’t kick in until midnight. Good thing he’s not a superhero as that would be problematic at times. Jarrett comes out second and says there’s something to get done before the match starts. We get a clip from last week with Page saying anywhere anytime to Kanyon, so here we go.

Kanyon vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Kanyon comes out (not of the closet yet) from under the ring to jump DDP which fails completely. We hit the floor and it’s all Page so far. Kanyon gets draped over the railing and Page spanks him. Oh dear. Ten punches in the corner are reversd by a low blow which the referee is all cool with. Back to the floor again and Page goes back first into the railing. Jarrett is nowhere to be found.

From the apron, Kanyon hits a Fameasser to the steps in a cool looking spot, busting Page open a bit. Kanyon continues his unorthodox offense by standing on the middle rope while on the inside and suplexing Page into the ring from the apron for two. Page tries to fight back but walks into a Northern Lights Suplex for two. After a modified facejam we’re off to the chinlock.

Page takes a swinging neckbreaker for two. Samoan Drop (I think. You never know with Kanyon) is reversed into a sunset flip for two. Discus lariat puts both guys down. Page gets up and another discus lariat puts Kanyon down. Spinning Rock Bottom gets two. Sitout Alabama Slam gets two for Kanyon. Sitout powerbomb gets two for DDP. They like these sitout moves. Diamond Cutter is reversed into the Kanyon Cutter (same move) and here’s Jarrett. Down goes the referee and of course Jarrett comes in with a Stroke for Page. Flatliner (Downward Spiral) ends Page.

Rating: C. Not a terrible match here but it was just there to set up the next match which is ok I guess. We got a decent match out of it also so that helps. Page is a good worker and you never would believe he was in his mid 40s. This worked fine and makes Page look weaker going into the main match, which is fine as long as he wins it.

Kanyon does the introductions for this.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Jarrett does his full intro again. We head into the crowd almost immediately as Page is more or less nothing. Also remember that he has the cut next to his eye so he’s losing blood rapidly. Page grabs some stuff to drill Jarrett with. Looks like a trashcan. For no apparent reason we go to a wide shot for a bit so you have to kind of guess where they are.

Back to ringside and we head to the announce table. DDT on the table to Jarrett but it doesn’t break. Cutter is blocked and DDP lands on Tony. Chair to the ribs of DDP and the evil one takes over again. After some stomping, Page gets a discus lariat (third in about 4 minutes) to take Jarrett down but DDP is taken down again very quickly. We hit a sleeper and here it makes a lot of sense as Page is spent.

The crowd reacts really well to Page holding the arm up on the sleeper. Page throws the sleeper on Jarrett but it only lasts a few seconds. DDT out of nowhere puts Jarrett down and it’s a double knockout at the moment. Both back up and Page hammers away. Ten buckles to Jarrett’s head set up a belly to back suplex for two. Belly to belly gets the same.

Page gets a Pancake (picture a Piledriver but Page jumps forward to slam Jarrett’s face into the mat). It gets two as Kanyon pulls Page out. With Page chasing after Kanyon, Jarrett pops Page in the back with a chair which somehow only gets two. Guitar misses Page and Kanyon is done. Diamond Cutter (BIG pop for that too. LISTEN WCW!!!) and Jarrett is done in a great moment for Page.

Rating: C+. Better match here than the previous one but dude, it’s Jarrett vs. Page. The problem in WCW is very apparent here though: Page just had two solid matches against a guy that means nothing and one of the “old” guys. Why not do this with two of the Thrillers or Storm for example? The company died for reasons like those.

We recap Nash vs. Steiner. Steiner was the monster heel and the crown jewel of the Magnificent Seven with Nash being the current great white hope (Booker was still injured at this point). Nash’s knee was destroyed six days before this.

Here’s Flair as the announcers talk about the envelope that Flair had earlier (scroll way up if you don’t remember it). Flair does commentary for the title match.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

And once again, two old guys are in the main event. Better than four old guys I guess. Steiner does his whole entrance and there’s no Nash. Steiner runs off Michael Buffer which is funny for some reason. We see the clip from Sin where Sid broke his leg and it literally makes me shake and cringe. Flair gets in the ring and makes it a retirement match. This would be probably Nash’s 3rd retirement match of the year or so. He’s 0-2 at the moment.

If Steiner loses he loses the title and his career and it’s against only Nash’s career. Not really fair. Nash’s music kicks on as the referee is counting. And he’s in a wheelchair with a cast on his leg. Nash stands up and gets in the ring. He grabs the belt and blasts Steiner in the head with it, getting the pin in 10 seconds. Flair makes it 2/3 falls. I think I know where this is going. It’s No DQ also.

In the back, Totally Buff beats up DDP and locks him in an anvil case. Holy random moment Batman! Nash beats up Steiner a bit because he can and doesn’t go for the Jackknife for no apparent reason. The beating goes on for a few minutes as everyone knows we’re just waiting to get to more shenanigans. Out to the floor and it’s all Nash. Midajah tries to interfere and it works, allowing Steiner to bash Nash in the head with a pipe. Nash is out cold on the floor so Steiner shouts to Flair to make it falls count anywhere. Flair says cool and it’s tied up.

Flair says on headset that the first fall didn’t count for no apparent reason. Brass knuckle shots from Steiner should mean Nash is dead but he gets back in a few seconds later. Both guys are busted a bit. Spinning belly to belly gets two and Steiner does his basic stuff. T-Bone gets two. It’s about 3am while I’m reviewing this and it’s ending my insomnia quickly.

Steiner gets the knucks again but can’t do anything with them. Sidewalk slam puts both guys down. Nash hit it if you were curious. Flair has Midajah take the knuckles out of Nash’s reach and hands Steiner a chair. Big shot to the head of Nash and the Recliner goes on. Nash just moves his arms and turns it into a regular chinlock which he escapes pretty easily, sending Scott to the floor.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring and Nash gets a chokeslam for two. Midajah tries to jump the referee which gets her nowhere. Snake eyes and a big boot set up the Jackknife and I wonder what they’re going to do to break the pin up. It would be Midajah again and she gets a side slam for her trouble. Another cover but Flair pulls the referee out and drills him. Low blow and a chair shot by Steiner sets up the Recliner to end this finally.

Rating: D. It’s another mess of a main event with very limited wrestling plus a ton of shenanigans here. Match was more or less nothing of course as there’s no need to have Nash vs. Steiner and various other old people in the main event but hey, that’s just common sense so who cares? Goldberg was (I’m assuming) healthy but this is what we get instead. Bad match but I think that’s the point here.

Nash is called the heart and soul of WCW. I give up.

Overall Rating: D+. Hard one to grade here as there’s some good stuff but they knew the new owners were coming in so they were more or less just holding down the fort. It’s definitely not the worst show they’ve ever done as the cruiserweight stuff was good and Page’s stuff was good, but the middle part of this show is just dreadfully boring on all accounts. Not terrible, but they knew they were in trouble and it was flat out too late.

 

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Fall Brawl 2000
Date: September 17, 2000
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 8,638
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

Well we have I think five or six PPVs to go in this company so this isn’t something where I would expect much. The main event is Booker vs. Nash in a cage as they’ve given up on the idea of War Games I guess. Other than that there’s a huge elimination match and Steiner vs. Goldberg, which hopefully has less shooting in it this time. Maybe we can shoot Russo. Let’s get to it.

Cruiserweight Title: Kwee Wee vs. Elix Skipper

Skipper was given the title by Storm and is a Deion Sanders ripoff that I always loved. Kwee Wee makes Rico look straight. Kwee Wee has Paisley with him, more commonly known as Sharmell, Booker’s wife. Kwee Wee had a weird double personality thing where he would go insane at times which is how he starts the match here. We go a nice wrestling sequence to start. Skipper is fun to watch and I’ve always liked him.

They botch a leapfrog and Skipper might be hurt. Hudson makes a reference to some guy named Johnny Walker from the 60s. Only Walker I know of is a whiskey but whatever. We have a WAY too long chinlock by Skipper as this is such a shell of what the Cruiserweight Title used to be. Prime Time (Skipper) does what Trish would steal and call the Matrish.

This is more like a match between two small guys than two cruiserweights. Crowd is kind of dead here but is behind the face so that’s a good sign I guess. The Natural Born Thrillers come out and I begin to smile. The Thrillers were a group of young guys that were something NEW and got pushed. Sure they were generic as all goodness but they were a freaking breath of air. There were like seven of them, led by Mike Sanders. They included Chuck Palumbo, Mark Jindrak, Shawn Stasiak, Sean O’Haire, Reno and Johnny the Bull. These guys were pretty generic, but DANG it was nice to see some fresh faces.

They don’t actually do anything as Kwee Wee comes back and beats the tar out of Skipper to no reaction at all. Skipper hits the floor and Mike Sanders comes in with a kendo stick (a stickball bat or some kind of device according to Tony) and bashes him in the knee for two. The Thrillers are gone but now it means nothing as we’re pretty even anyway. Overdrive (MVP’s Play of the Day) ends it.

Rating: D+. This was just not clicking at all. The match was dull but hey, it had a run in so it has to be interesting right? This just was nothing special at all as they just did a mat based match and then a screwjob ending. I’m not entirely sure what the point was here as the styles clash killed it. Not a good way to start but not a horrible match.

3 Count vs. Misfits in Action

The Misfits here are Sgt. AWOL (The Wall who most of you likely don’t remember) Lieutenant Loco (Chavo) and Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux). The band has a new song here that likely could have been a decent hit if sung by a “legit” band, which is either great or scary. The idea of the Misfits was that they were guys that were thrown out of storylines by Russo so they banded together as their only way to have a chance. That works well enough.

And yes, 3 Count gets a match against someone not named the Jung Dragons. Two of the boy band members are Shannon Moore and Shane (Gregory) Helms. The third sucks. We hear about Duggan giving the flag and board to General Rection (Hugh Morrus) and will be in his corner tonight. Yeah I’m sure this isn’t going to go badly at all for Rection.

This is a pretty basic match but it’s not bad. They’re just kind of filling in time as these matches aren’t going to mean anything past tonight anyway. The idea here is that the band is scared to death of AWOL so they’re going to try to keep him out. Simple story but it works. Leroux was a lot better than he was given credit for. I might even stretch to say he was pretty good.

He hits a springboard X Factor to get the hot tag to AWOL who cleans house. Moore hits a nice flip to put Cajun down and we let the high spots loose. AWOL gets knocked through a table (his signature thing) but not before holding Moore up off the ground purely by his hair. Everything goes insane and Leroux hits Helms with what we would more or less call Cradle Shock for the pin. They get a standing ovation for it and that’s what they deserved.

Rating: B. I REALLY liked this. There was no interference, there was nothing completely insane, the effort was there and the wrestling was there. What a shock that when you put all this together, you get a good match. Worst thing is I can more or less guarantee this is the high point of the show.

The old guys won’t give a kid an autograph. That’s WCW for you. Madden gets a line in about Nash carrying people. I laugh sadly…..point to this?

Harris Brothers vs. Kronik

And there goes the quality of the show. This is first a chain match, as in they’re attached by a strap. The twins (Harris Brothers/Disciples of Apocolypse/Creative Control/Blu Brothers etc) cost Kronik the belts last month. Adams makes it a first blood match, because gimmicks added on for no apparent reason other than to keep an old guy from having to get pinned and therefore lose credibility TOTALLY RULE!

Dave Penzer, the announcer, gets knocked out like a minute in. We go out into the crowd and this is already a mess. As I’m typing this I can see the review of the previous match and it makes me sad. That and even the previous match were good. This is just annoying and is going to mean nothing at all in the end. Hudson talks about how brutal this is and how it’s going to be violent. We’re less than three minutes in and he’s right: it’s brutal.

One of the Harris guys works on Clark’s knee in a first blood match for reasons of general idiocy. We get choking, which even Tony calls out as stupid. And we have a ref bump in a gimmick match. One of the Harrises is bleeding but there’s no referee of course. The chain is undone and Hudson suggests he’s on his period instead of being busted open. END THIS. Yeah the blood is wiped off and Adams is bleeding when the referee gets back up so Kronik loses. Kronik beats up the referee to be faces.

Rating: F+. Well seven minutes have passed and nothing of note has changed. These two feuded forever and no one cared at all. We went from good stuff to this, which like I said shouldn’t surprise anyone. Get to the next thing.

General Rection tries to do a big patriotic promo which would work a lot better if he wasn’t destined to have Jim Duggan turn on him since he’s the special enforcer.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm

Storm cuts a great heel promo about how great Canada is. He was AWESOME at this point and more or less could do no wrong on the mic. He would just get out there and be this pompous jerk but was so proud of being Canadian and no one could beat him, making him awesome. And here’s Duggan to be all patriotic. Great to see that white shirt under his referee shirt. I’m sure that will mean nothing at all.

Rection dominates to start and Storm is in trouble. Also Major Gunns has been kidnapped by Team Canada so she’s freed if Rection wins here. They say that the General could be a superstar. That’s just amusing. He’s more commonly known as Bill DeMott if the comedy name isn’t familiar to you. Storm hits a superkick that was on target but didn’t look painful at all.

Rection hits a sitout gutwrench powerbomb (spellcheck hates that sentence) for no cover. Storm gets up and goes after the knee. Duggan throws Storm back into the ring and gets up on the apron while the General goes for the moonsault. And say it with me: Duggan is Canadian. Storm gets the win while Rection is out cold in the Mapleleaf. MIA runs out and Duggan beats them down.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t horrible, but the turn might as well have had a big sign over it saying HEEL TURN COMING. Rection would wind up winning the title at the next two PPVs while no one cared about it nor were they watching. This didn’t go anywhere though and it’s only because of Storm’s pure awesomeness at this point that it gets this much. That and Gunns in those shorts. I mean DANG.

Gene (wearing glasses now) talks to the Natural Born Thrillers. Sanders imitates Konnan so Gene calls them various bad names and tells them to blow it. Sanders was very good on the mic.

Filthy Animals/Big Vito/Paul Orndorff vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Filthy Animals: Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Disco Inferno, Juventud Guerrera, Tygress (female manager)

Natural Born Thrillers: Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, Mike Sanders, Chuck Palumbo, Shawn Stasiak, Reno, Johnny the Bull

This is elimination style. Yes it’s that Paul Orndorff. He trained most of the Thrillers in the Power Plant (the same place that said one Dave Bautista had no future in wrestling) and he drew about 15 years ago so he’s PERFECT here. Orndorff is a mystery partner here. He SHOCKS the Thrillers. OH NO! IT’S ON OVER THE HILL OVERRATED GUY THAT HASN’T MEANT A FREAKING THING SINCE WE WERE IN 5TH GRADE! Wait….this is WCW and he’s over fifty…..WE’RE SCREWED!!!

Stasiak goes on commentary for no apparent reason. Konnan makes gay jokes and introduced Orndorff. Wow this is so completely overhyped. No one cheers either. They just kind of breathe. Also, we get to see a 51 year old man that looks about twice that old in lime green tights. Rock on brother man.

This was billed as 6-6 but there are so many people that a lot have to drop to the floor, making it look like 4-4. Rey and Juvy are tag champions as I try to fill space. Ok apparently they aren’t….they just have the belts for the second straight PPV in a row. Rey tags in Juvy to absolutely NO reaction. I wasn’t looking at the screen and didn’t even notice it. Normally you get a sound from the crowd to let you know that something happened but there was NOTHING here.

O’Haire hits a Falcon’s Arrow to take down Juvy who of course is fine like 4 seconds later. Vito, the big guy on the team I guess, beats up Jindrak and is only there for Johnny. And here’s Disco to again complete silence. Oh never mind they think that he, a face, sucks. Jimdrak, a guy about 6’5, can’t get a dropkick past the ribs of Disco who is about 6’0. Ok Konnan is in the match despite sitting on the floor so far.

Konnan crashes into Disco so Disco accidentally hits him with the Last Dance (Stunner) to eliminate him. Shawn says five to go, implying 6-6 to start. Disco can’t get anyone to tag him in so Vito punches him and Reno Rolls the Dice to end him and make it 6-4 I guess. Vito hits an Edgecution on Palumbo for two. Bull hits Vito in the head with a kendo stick and a Roll of the Dice (rolling cutter, Cross Roads) ends him.

That leaves it as Juvy, Rey and Orndorff left, so Madden suggests that Tygress is on the team too. So then Tony says it’s 6-2 as Orndorff is there for…..oh screw it let’s just get this over with. Guerrera hits a flying…..something to Reno. Tony calls it a body attack which sounds like something from Mortal Kombat. Juvy Driver and WHAT’S UP on Reno makes it however many vs. however many. Oh and over ten minutes in and I think there are 4 people that haven’t even been in yet.

Rey and Juy apparently ARE the tag champions here. Tony said they weren’t 8 minutes ago and now they are. My goodness I know WCW at this time is called insane but I’ve always thought it was overhyped. In this match alone, about ten minutes long at this point, we can’t establish how many original participants there were in this match, we’ve gotten three different answers as to how many people are left on one of the teams at this point, and we don’t even know if two guys are tag team champions? Ok according to Wikipedia they are the champions but are forced to forfeit them tomorrow for no given reason. Now why can I establish that and the paid announcers can’t?

The fans hate Tygress all of a sudden as Juvy’s plancha is just caught. And then HOKEY SMOKE O’Haire and Jindrak LAUNCH Juvy from the floor into the ring off a double hip toss. That looked incredible. A Swanton Bomb ends Juvy…..and here’s Orndorff. Of course he beats up all the young guys but a kendo stick takes care of him. He hits a bad piledriver to get rid of Johnny the Bull.

Rey and Tygress (now on the apron) just let Orndorff get double teamed and do all the work. Sanders hasn’t been in yet. He of course beats up Jindrak and O’Haire on his own, making them look completely weak in the process. He goes to piledrive Jindrak and of course gets hurt coming down, giving himself a stinger (same thing that happened to Austin in 97 off the Owen piledriver) and O’Haire quickly covers him for the pin because of the injury.

Rey and Tygress I guess don’t get that he’s really hurt and keep going on Jindrak. After a pair of Bronco Busters we get the idea so they beat up Sanders and Palumbo to keep the crowd into it I guess. Pay no attention to the fact that they’re landing around Paul’s legs or anything like that. And they stop the match because of the injury. They would conclude it the next night where Rey and Tygress would beat five guys on their own.

Rating: F. There should be two ratings here. The match itself was entertaining and was about a B/B-, but to let a guy in there that was 51 years old and had retired because of a neck injury and then, shocking no one with a brain, hurts his neck in his first match back in like 5 years is simply irresponsible. I don’t care if he swears up and down that he’ll be ok or whatever. You don’t let him into the ring with his neck hurt like that, and this is why.

He wasn’t even taking a bump and he got hurt. Imagine what would have happened if he had been taking am ove and got hurt like this. There is just no way you can validate letting Orndorff go out there. It didn’t sell any more shows because he wasn’t even announced, so this comes off as just irresponsible by WCW and there’s no way that is ok in my mind.

Kidman and Madusa talk about their scaffold match. Yeah this is a perfect place to go after what just happened, but at the same time that wasn’t planned. Madusa threatens to demoralize her. What the heck does that even mean?

Shane Douglas/Torrie Wilson vs. Madusa/Billy Kidman

The scaffold is over the stage here which I’m sure is completely safe. Also instead of putting them on the scaffold which starts on the ground and is raised up, they have to climb and waste more time. Douglas promises to pay everyone’s money back if the faces don’t get thrown. This is a Pittsburgh PLUNGE match, but apparently you win by crossing and climbing down. Sure why not. Kidman and Madusa don’t get entrances and just walk out and get on.

Tony tells Madden to get his jokes in so Tony can sell the match. Egads man. Tony insists it’s still going up when you can tell it’s perfectly still. The scaffold here is at least fairly wide to the point where they can walk side by side on it. That’s a LOT better than previous kinds. You know it’s a good thing we have those VIDEO screens to show the Fall Brawl logo so we know what show this MATCH is on.

The girls sprint off to get down the other side and are all alone so they just stand there. Kidman and Shane have a match up there with counters and a Sky High powerbomb and then the Franchiser (modified Stunner) on Kidman. And then Shane kicks Madusa down the ladder so that she crashes down. Now since she didn’t climb down, she doesn’t win. Oh give me a break.

Shane beats up Kidman and has him down so Torrie comes back over and waits for him to make his comeback and then hits him low so Shane can throw Kidman off the scaffold and onto the crash pad below. Once someone reminds them which way to go, the heels win. Yep, Shane Douglas is pushed over Kidman. Do I even need to explain why this was bad?

Rating: F+. How do you really grade one of these? It was maybe five minutes long and went nowhere. Shane made Kidman look freaking pathetic here and that doesn’t surprise me at all. Shane was in the downside of his career and Kidman was a guy with potential. Of course he lost. Whatever, and at least Torrie looked incredible.

Sting talks about his three way with Muta and Vampiro. Oh and he has a world title match tomorrow night. Jeff Jarrett jumps him for no apparent reason.

Mike Tenay goes to David Flair’s house to talk to him about the wedding that didn’t work. He was supposed to marry Stacy since she was pregnant and it turned out the baby wasn’t his. We never found out who it was but it allegedly was going to be Ric Flair and would wind up being some kind of incest angle, or Russo because clearly a 20 year old Stacy would screw him.

David is losing his mind and his place is covered in trash and pizza boxes so he lights up a cigarette but throws it away because it’ll kill him. David goes paranoid and thinks that his brother Reed, who is 11, is the dad. He goes to the window a bunch of times where he says the father is here. And then he doesn’t do anything about it.

I didn’t order this PPV and I think this aired on TV later because I’ve seen this before. David sprints to the door and says the father is here so he runs outside and beats up the mailman, putting him in the figure four on the front lawn. There also was a camera waiting on the camera guy as he was I guess coming across the street. What a coincidence eh?

Sting vs. Great Muta vs. Vampiro

ICP is with the heels here who come out together. The clowns are on commentary here. They talk about JCW and I get it now. Maybe I did get this PPV but I could have sworn they did commentary on Thunder too. The commentary is funny to a degree but it gets old fast. They beat on Sting for awhile but they fight after Muta goes for a pin and Vampiro doesn’t like it. This is definitely a different match than the one I remember. Sting gets a bat and hits the Death Drop on Muta for the pin. There was nothing else of note to talk about here. The clowns and Vampiro beat up Muta and Sting makes the save.

Rating: D-. At least it was short I guess and the commentary made me laugh once or twice. This feud was just never going to stop and no one at all cared about it. Granted that might be because of Vampiro and the fact that no one knew who Muta was because WCW never told us that but whatever.

Mike Awesome, in 70s clothes and a Partridge Family bus, shows up with a surprise: it’s Gary Coleman. Sadly he gets one of the biggest pops of the night. They do a terrible comedy bit with Pamela Paulshock who was drop dead gorgeous.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mike Awesome

This is a bunkhouse brawl, meaning hardcore match. There are Buffalo Bills at ringside and Jarrett wears a Titans jersey to be a jerk. He makes bad football jokes and this goes dead fast. There are weapons in the ring and Awesome brings his own table. The announcers say that Jarrett is the favorite in this match. We have ropes and wheelbarrows here as you can hear Dusty jacking off to this.

There are nooses around the ropes and a table covered in barbed wire. This is Jarrett’s specialty match in case you didn’t know. Why is it his specialty match? Well no one knows but whatever. It starts out as just a weapons match with nothing at all special about it. Jarrett backdrops Awesome from the middle rope through a table just to be mean. Jarrett goes into the barbed wire table twice and then a sitout powerbomb gets two.

After the Awesome Splash misses, Jarrett yells at the Bills some more. And here they come, surrounding the ring while security does nothing at all. They shove him into Awesome and the powerbomb gets….two. I know the ending to this match and I thought the match was ending there. Not because it was a close pin or anything but because there was no reason at all for it to continue other than the inevitable Gary Coleman stuff that you know is coming.

And here he is. The Bills let Jarrett get a guitar and Coleman just walks into the ring and low blows Jarrett who them just kills him with the guitar. NOW FREAKING STING IS HERE to beat up Jarrett so that Awesome can FINALLY win. So let’s see: Mike Awesome, Gary Coleman, Sting and THE BUFFALO BILLS ended this. How much do you think all this cost?

Rating: D. I almost hat to type Gary Coleman sold the guitar shot. Did someone think this was going to help business somehow? Did someone think this was going to be funny? I mean eas there a point to this at all? If there was I don’t get it. The hardcore stuff was ok here though, but the match was just WAY too much to be good.

Scott Steiner says he’ll beat Goldberg here because he has big muscles.

Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

This is just a grudge match and I guess Goldberg is a face here. No DQ here either. Steiner has to wear a mask because Goldberg broke his face or something. We’re told about how even these two are which is odd but makes sense at the same time. Scotty busts out a Diamond Cutter for two. Ok then. Steiner tries to hide and that doesn’t go well at all for him.

They’re doing the clash of the titans build here and for the most part it’s working. And here’s Midajah, which is supposed to be a big deal I guess. Goldberg is bleeding from some chair shots. She’s just standing there for no apparent reason. Oh ok Goldberg accidentally put her through a table. Steiner hits a belly to belly where Goldberg lands on his head and nearly breaks his neck. There’s the spear. We have a lead pipe in there too which I’m sure will have something to do with the ending.

And it’s Vince Russo to bash Goldberg with a baseball bat. Sure why not. It only gets two though and Bill goes through a table. Steiner Recliner, which looks awful since Steiner doesn’t know how to hook it right, doesn’t work as Goldberg picks him up. This is the match where they just hammer each other with no real rhyme or reason. That doesn’t mean it’s bad though as that’s what this is supposed to be. Think Awesome vs. Tanaka.

Back to the Recliner which would look a lot better if it wasn’t just Goldberg crawling on his hands and knees (yeah the arms aren’t even pulled back) to the ropes. A chair is brought in and nothing happens with it. Russo comes in AGAIN but Steiner pops Goldberg in the head with a lead pipe and the Recliner gets the win on the unconscious Goldberg. Oh and Russo does the Jericho cover on him to end it. The Bills come in again to help Goldberg. More on Russo in the overall rating.

Rating: B-. This was about being a big old fight and that’s all it was supposed to be. We didn’t need to have real wrestling here and they didn’t try. I could have done without Russo here but at the same time this match oddly worked. This was probably a #1 contenders match of some sort too.

Booker says he’ll get the title back. Nash booked himself to win the title for about three weeks so he could defend coming into this.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Kevin Nash

Dang there are some attractive women in Buffalo. This is a cage match. We get a Scott Hall reference, even though Hall was long since gone at this point. No waiting at all as we’re starting to run out of PPV time. The cage looks extra tall here which is allegedly 12 feet high which is believable here. The camera is weird here as it’s outside and we keep looking up at the guys.

We’re told that Orndorff had a stinger but is talking and has movement in all of his limbs. That’s always good to hear. Nash is actually moving a bit in there. He takes the buckle pad off as Tony, much like Billy Graham did 12 years ago, asks why you need to do that when you have a cage around you. Axe Kick puts Nash down as apparently him slamming Nash is a big deal.

They’re flying through this match with no transitional stuff at all. Nash is bleeding here. RONCO REFERENCE! Yeah that has nothing to do with wrestling but I have a thing for infomercials so there we go. We’re told Nash has a lot of heart. Uh…sure. Jackknife is blocked into the Book End for the title for Booker.

Rating: C-. This FLEW by and felt like a Nitro main event rather than a PPV main event. Goldberg vs. Steiner likely should have closed the show but I can get that they wanted to make the world title seem important. This wasn’t anything all that great at all but for once one champion lost the title to another guy clean and simple. What more can you ask for? Booker would hold the title for 8 days, so it’s not like this meant much in the long run.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a rather good show. The problem is this is pretty much the best show for WCW in their last 15 months or so. The elimination match would have been a lot better had it not been for the injury and while I still wouldn’t have liked Orndorff getting in there even if he hadn’t gotten hurt, the injury is what made that match fall apart so you can’t blame the wrestlers for it.

The scaffold match was really short so that didn’t hurt things too much. This isn’t a classic or anything but it’s definitely watchable as they toned down the insanity a lot and the show is completely coherent with nothing overly bad that goes more than say five minutes.

The most important thing here is simple: there’s a point to everything on the card. Nothing here is insane or just thrown on there, which is the point of a PPV. If you want a taste of what WCW could do around this time, this is your best chance. And then it means nothing at all as Vince Russo would win the world title 8 days later on Nitro, killing anything the company had left for it.

 

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