Smackdown
Date: December 23, 2005
Hosts: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the holiday season and since Raw was over in Afghanistan, it’s Best Of time. That’s a good thing for a change as the show could be a nice look back at a hit or miss year. Sometimes you need a little breather and not having a show two days before Christmas should help a bit. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video package on the year.

Cole and Tazz welcome us to the show and talk about what a great year it was.

We’ll start off with the biggest name around.

From Wrestlemania XXI.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Batista

HHH is defending and has Ric Flair with him, plus Motorhead plays him to the ring, just in case you thought Batista was cooler. I mean, you can barely understand the words because Lemmy butchers it in a great Brutus Beefcake impression but HHH rising up through the stage makes up for it a bit. Batista doesn’t get much of a pop, mainly due to the lack of the famous band performing his music.

The early power lockup lets them drive each other to the ropes but it’s only good for a standoff. They do it again with HHH’s running shoulder having no effect other than waking HHH up a bit. Another shoulder drops Batista but he’s right back up with something close to a powerslam. Batista hits a backdrop, only to have HHH knock him outside to cut the momentum off again.

Flair’s distraction lets HHH send Batista into the steps and Flair gets in some choking with the jacket. Back in and HHH gets two off a suplex, setting up more Flair choking. Whatever emotion the fans had for Batista after that HHH entrance is long gone now as HHH has beaten him down for about seven of the eight minutes the match has been going so far. Batista slugs away but walks into the spinebuster, because of course HHH needs to hit a spinebuster as he dominates Batista in the biggest match of Batista’s career.

A backdrop breaks up the Pedigree attempt but HHH is RIGHT BACK with the facebuster, leaving him on defense for all of three seconds. HHH goes up and gets clotheslined out of the air to no reaction as the fans are gone. They’re smart enough to realize that HHH is going to cut Batista off again and, as expected, Batista charges into a big boot in the corner just a few seconds later. Batista sends HHH over the corner, only to have HHH whip him into the steps.

The Pedigree onto the steps is countered into a catapult into the post and we’ve got some blood. Back in and it’s time to hammer on the cut as the fans finally have something to cheer about. The big running clothesline in the corner rocks HHH and a powerslam gets two as there isn’t quite the energy in the offense that you would expect. It feels like they’re just doing stuff to fill time until the ending instead of of building something up.

Batista sends him outside but goes after Flair, allowing HHH to grab the chair, which hits the referee by mistake. Flair’s belt shot is countered with a spinebuster but HHH’s belt shot gets two. The fans react to the kickout and Batista hits the spinebuster for the big reaction. That’s too much cheering for HHH’s liking so he hits Batista low. Batista blocks the Pedigree with raw power though and hits something like White Noise. The Batista Bomb finally makes Batista champion.

Rating: C. It was miles better than Cena vs. JBL but egads this didn’t do Batista any favors. This was more about giving HHH a big sendoff as champion than making Batista look like a star and….I can’t say I’m surprised. Batista has looked so dominant and smart for the last six weeks that HHH probably couldn’t help himself from cutting him off. HHH did put him over, but it could have been a lot stronger without HHH beating him up and outsmarting him for the first half of the match. Much like the previous match though, it’s all about what comes next rather than what happened here, but HHH made sure to make himself look good.

We take a quick look at JBL’s Celebration of Excellence on February 24.

From April 28.

Booker T. vs. Big Show vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Kurt Angle

Elimination rules for the #1 contendership and Orlando Jordan is here with JBL. Angle already has the straps down so you know this is serious. The brawl is on in a hurry to start with Show cleaning house, even knocking away a German suplex attempt. A legdrop crushes JBL and sends Booker flying off a toss. Show crushes all three of them in the corner but Angle pops out with an Angle Slam for one.

Booker adds the ax kick for two and the Clothesline From JBL gets the same. They knock Show outside for the huge Angle Slam through the table….and a countout for the elimination. In a four way? That’s a creative way to get rid of him, even if it goes against the general rules of the match. We take a break and come back with Booker fighting out of the corner but crotching himself off a missed sidekick.

A whip into the steps slows JBL down and Angle suplexes Booker for two. JBL comes back in and walks into a Book End for two but Angle is right back with the rolling German suplexes for the same on Booker. Neither the Angle Slam or the Book End can connect so Angle picks the ankle. That’s broken up as well so Angle hits the Slam for two more. Booker’s superkick gets his own near fall as Jordan slides in a chair. That earns him an ejection and the distraction lets Angle chair Booker in the head for the second elimination to get us down to one on one.

We take another break and come back with JBL slightly cut open and Angle fighting out of a chinlock. The ankle lock goes on but gets broken up just as quickly and there’s the fall away slam. The Clothesline hits the referee though, just as Angle gets the ankle lock. JBL calls out the Bashams for the save so it’s a bunch of suplexes all around. That includes some rolling German suplexes to JBL and the ankle lock gets the tap, which no one sees. Cue Booker to chair Angle down, allowing JBL to steal the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Booker vs. Angle made this work rather well, even when the ending was as obvious as you could have gotten. They have made no secret about the fact that this was JBL’s win the entire way and that’s fine. It makes the most sense and you can have the other three get title shots later on if they want to. Not a great match, but it got around the clear finish and that’s kind of hard to do.

Long video on Tribute to the Troops.

From January 6.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Fallout from last week’s Tag Team Title match. Rey brings out the 619 Cam but Eddie steals it for some filming of guest timekeeper Joy Giovanni. We get started with Rey snapping off a headscissors but getting caught in a test of strength. That’s broken up with Rey climbing onto Eddie’s back for two off a sunset flip, meaning it’s an early standoff. Back up and it’s another headscissors to rattle Eddie some more.

Rey charges again but this time he gets faceplanted down, setting up an armbar on the right (not left Cole) arm. The hammerlock goes on for a good bit until Rey makes the rope, with Eddie not letting go immediately. Rey tries a moonsault but gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a dropkick to the ribs. Eddie misses a charge though and crotches himself against the post as we take a break.

Back with Rey holding something like an abdominal stretch on the mat before switching to an armbar. An exchange of sleepers goes to Rey, followed by a springboard armdrag. Rey gets two off a Lionsault and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up so Rey dropkicks him into the ropes, only to miss the 619. Eddie chills in the corner so Rey tries a Bronco Buster, which is blocked with a raised boot.

It was NOT a low blow though (Eddie promises) so Rey takes him up top but the hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb. A missed charge bumps the referee though and Eddie has an idea. It’s the old grab the title spot so he throws it to Rey….who throws it right back and drops down as the referee gets up.

Eddie crawls around on his stomach to hide the title and INSISTS that he did not use the belt. He tries to crawl over and throw it away but gets caught, giving us a hilarious look on his face. Rey cracks up and Eddie tries to convince the referee that it means Rey did it. That’s almost a double DQ but Eddie’s begging keeps the match going….and lets Rey small package him for the pin.

Rating: B-. Well of course these two had a fun match, but the ending was hysterical with Eddie going so over the top when he had no idea what to do in the situation. His NO and HE’S LAUGHING got some actual laughter and they did it for the right reason. How often do you get that in wrestling?

Cole and Tazz talk about how they will miss Eddie.

We get the Here Without You video on Eddie, which is still incredible.

Video on the Boogeyman.

Video on the new talent who came to the show this year.

We look at Chris Benoit winning the US Title in less than thirty seconds at Summerslam.

Cole and Tazz talk about Booker vs. Benoit, with Cole referring to Sharmell as Booker’s “Lovely wife I guess you’d call her.” Tazz: “It is his wife.”

From October 21, 2005.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Booker T.

Benoit is defending and Sharmell is here with Booker. They fight over a lockup to start and it’s a clean break in the corner. Booker actually wrestles him down but Benoit slips out and catches him with a hiptoss. Back up and Benoit’s hammerlock doesn’t get him far as they go into the corner for some chops. Booker misses the side kick though and crashes out to the floor, only to avoid Benoit’s dive to send him into the announcers’ table.

Back from a break with Booker holding a chinlock and whipping him hard into the corner for two. The chinlock goes on again so Benoit fights up again and hits a running forearm for two of his own. It’s time to roll the German suplexes to freak Sharmell out again. The Swan Dive gives Benoit two but Booker is back up with a kick to the face. That lets him head up top but Benoit superplexes him down, albeit with a slip on the way. The referee checks on Booker, allowing Sharmell to hit him low. Booker nails the ax kick for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. It’s the expected good match between these two, though the Sharmell stuff was as annoying as ever. She’s a heel, but she’s the kind of heel where she’s more pesky than evil. Benoit feels like a transitional champion as he spent most of his reign beating up Orlando Jordan in thirty seconds so the loss doesn’t mean much. At least Sharmell will have something else to complain about now.

We recap Sharmell yelling at Booker to motivate him, setting up the heel turn and US Title win.

From Survivor Series.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Shawn Michaels, Kane, Big Show, Carlito, Chris Masters

Smackdown: Batista, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio

Entrances take forever of course and Rey gets some very loud EDDIE chants. Orton takes Shawn into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. Shawn gets in a whip to the other corner to set up some chops as commentary is already bickering. Orton gets in a slam but misses the knee drop so it’s off to Masters. The knee the face works fine on him but it’s quickly off to Lashley, who tosses Masters around.

Carlito gets the tag so Lashley pulls him in and hits a running powerslam for two. It’s back to Shawn, who gets knocked down as well. There’s the Dominator to Carlito but Kane saves Shawn from the same fate. A Kane chokeslam from the apron lets Shawn get rid of Lashley, who wasn’t nearly the factor you would have bet on after the last few weeks. Rey comes in and dropkicks Shawn in the knee as Cole says he’d love to see this dream match. I know he has a short attention span but he can’t remember something from less than two weeks ago?

Kane comes in and gets dropkicked down but is right back up for a big boot. A backbreaker gets two on Rey and we hit the backbreaker. Rey fights out in a hurry though and it’s off to Batista for the shoulders in the corner. A spear into the spinebuster gets rid of Kane but here’s Show for an immediate chokeslam. That’s good for two but Kane is back up for a double chokeslam to get rid of Batista. JBL’s middle rope shoulder is pulled out of the air by Big Show but Orton snaps his throat across the top.

The Clothesline From JBL into the 619 into the RKO into another Clothesline From JBL into the springboard seated senton FINALLY gets rid of Big Show and we’re down to 3-3. Everything breaks down and JBL hits Shawn with a fall away slam on the floor as Masters plants Rey. Carlito comes in for a legdrop and the chinlock goes on. Rey fights up and gets a blind tag from JBL, who blasts Carlito with the Clothesline for the pin.

Masters comes in next and gets hammered down as Shawn is still out on the floor. Rey comes back in and avoids a charge into the post, setting up the 619. Dropping the Dime gets rid of Masters and it’s down to Shawn vs. Orton/Mysterio/JBL. Rey throws Shawn back in and hits the 619 but the West Coast Pop is Sweet Chin Musiced out of the air for the pin. JBL tries the Clothesline but Shawn ducks and superkicks him out for the back to back pins in about fifteen seconds.

That leaves us with Shawn vs. Orton but neither finisher can hit. Orton bails to the floor so Shawn hits a slingshot dive as the fans want Undertaker. Back in and Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup but JBL is still here and brings in a chair. That earns him another superkick but Shawn walks into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was good enough and was absolutely the main event of the show. Even though this was for completely meaningless bragging rights, it worked this time because that was something fresh. It’s the difference between doing it once and doing it every year: this time felt like they had built something up instead of throwing it out there because it was November. It also helps when you have Shawn at his best playing the underdog and Orton being great at this match. This nearly identical formula worked in 2003 and it worked here too.

Post match the Smackdown locker room comes in to celebrate….and we’ve got druids. They bring out a casket and stand it upright as the gong hits. Lightning strikes the casket and it is lit on fire, with Undertaker walking out. Undertaker destroys the roster as the Ortons get to the outside. The big staredown with the throat slit ends the show.

Quick look at Undertaker vs. Randy Orton, including the Cell match.

Cole and Tazz wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C+. They did a nice job of looking at the high points of the year, which is hard to do in the course of an hour. Of course they had to leave some stuff out (like John Cena being the star of the show for about five months) but they hit the big stuff and that’s what they should be trying for with something like this. 2005 wasn’t a great year, but they made it look good enough so well done.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 12, 2005
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

It’s officially a new era as Eric Bischoff was fired last week. That ends a three and a half year reign from Bischoff, meaning we now need a new boss. Or maybe not at the time as we have the build for the Elimination Chamber to get us through the next week or two. That could make for some good stuff so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last week’s trial and Eric Bischoff being fired.

Here’s Vince McMahon to get things going, but first he has to throw away a microphone that doesn’t work. Last week he fired Eric Bischoff and that isn’t changing. Oh and Merry Christmas to Eric and his family. As for a new GM, Vince has some options. Maybe Stephanie McMahon or Shane McMahon, or Theo Epstein or Ted Turner. It might even be one of the fans here! Vince: “Just ribbing. It won’t be one of you.”

Vince has assigned someone to be the interim GM for tonight. He’s a business genius, handsome and one virile SOB. Naturally that’s Vince himself, and tonight it’s the Elimination Chamber qualifying matches. We’ll start with this, and the fans will NOT be censored during his entrance.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Ric Flair vs. Kurt Angle

Non-title. Flair headlocks him down to start and Angle is already bailing into the corner. With the WOOing out of the way, Angle drives him into the corner and pounds away. Some chops don’t do Flair much good so it’s a German suplex into the ankle lock. A few dives allow Flair to make it to the rope so Angle grapevines it for the four count as we take a break.

Back with Flair fighting out of a chinlock and belly to back suplexing his way to freedom. The Figure Four goes on but it’s pretty close to the rope and doesn’t last long. The leg is fine enough to pop off an overhead belly to belly but Flair chops him to the floor. Angle grabs a chair so the referee gets rid of them, allowing Angle to whip out a gold medal and knock Flair silly for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was getting good until the end and I’m always appreciative of protecting a champion. Angle beating Flair on his own wouldn’t have been horrible but there’s no need to have the champ lose again so soon after Survivor Series. I could go for more of this, though it would just make me wonder what they could have done in their primes.

Post match Angle goes on a rant about how Raw is going to Afghanistan next week for a Tribute to the Troops. It’s voluntary though and Angle is NOT going because the troops have done nothing for him. MAYBE is they catch Osama Bin Laden, he’ll go over there and sign some autographs.

We cut to Daivari in the back in front of statues of Boston sports legends Larry Bird and Bobby Orr. He whips out some spray paint so he can treat them like Americans treat Angle but here’s angry John Cena to cut them off. Cena goes on a rant about how Angle won’t go honor the troops that keep him safe. Half of the people think Cena sucks too so but that’s because we’re in AMERICA! With no American soldiers there are no American heroes, and you can’t see him, so he spray paints the camera lens.

Edge and Lita mock Flair for being arrested. A fight is teased but goes nowhere.

Shelton Benjamin comes in to see Shawn Michaels and asks him about last week when Shawn wanted an attitude. That’s what Shelton gave him and now Shawn isn’t happy. Tonight, Shelton is qualifying for the Elimination Chamber and he hopes Shawn is there. Shelton hands Shawn a copy of Shawn’s book to show him….I’m not sure actually.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Shelton jumps him at the bell to start and Carlito is stomped to the floor early on. Back in and a quick belly to belly drops Carlito again. Shelton follows him to the floor for some clotheslines but Carlito rams him into the apron. Back in again and the Backstabber drops Shelton, followed by a backbreaker to keep the focus strong.

The Boston crab is broken up in a hurry and Shelton hits a Samoan drop into some clotheslines. A sunset flip connects but Carlito grabs the referee to get a slight delay. Carlito hits him in the back but walks into the exploder….for no cover. Instead Shelton grabs the apple and takes a bite, allowing Carlito to small package him for the pin.

Rating: C-. What does it say that Shelton is moving up in the world by having a reason for him to lose? This just keeps getting worse and worse but for some reason WWE doesn’t see much in Shelton. I’m not a big Carlito guy but in this case, he’s the right choice to put into the match. Granted the match might not be the best idea, though that has never stopped them before.

Trevor Murdoch talks to Vince about being the GM. Vince throws him out for having tobacco and moves on to find Candice Michelle. The word position is mentioned several times and lingerie is revealed. Kurt Angle storms in and Vince is ready to kill him as we go to a break.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Big Show vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn gets thrown into the corner to start and has to chop his way out of a chokeslam attempt. A low bridge puts Show on the floor but he catches the dive and throws Shawn back in. The big elbow misses so Show goes with the bearhug instead. That’s broken up so Shawn chops away, only to have the forearm pulled out of the air.

Rating: C+. Shawn was moving out there and had you believing that this could go either way, which is hard to do in about five and a half minutes. The ending sets up a match at No Year’s Revolution and gave us a few entertaining minutes of action. Not too bad, but Shawn can make something work out of almost any situation.

Kurt demands a title match against Cena tonight but Vince reminds him that this isn’t Eric Bischoff’s Raw anymore. Instead, Vince gives Cena a You Can’t See Me match against Daivari, meaning Cena will be blindfolded. Oh and you can disrespect the troops and Larry Bird, but NEVER interrupt him. Angle and Daivari leave so Vince can admire Candice’s magic wand (minus Candice).

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Chris Masters vs. Viscera

Masters powers him into the corner but Viscera comes out with a slam. An elbow gives Viscera two and he falls on top of Masters for daring to try a slam of his own. The Masterlock doesn’t work as Viscera drives him into the corner, setting up a side slam. A Samoan drop puts him down as well, only to have Masters drop toehold him into the corner. The Masterlock to a kneeling Viscera is good for the submission.

Rating: D+. You know, this wasn’t too bad all things considered. Who would have expected anything from these two? Masters getting the hold on Viscera was kind of impressive and the match wound up being a decent enough power showdown. I still don’t see Masters as anything more than a midcarder, but like Carlito, he’s the right choice at this point.

Smackdown Rebound.

Trish Stratus went to talk to Mickie James but Mickie tells a story about growing up watching wrestling with her grandfather. He took her to Wrestlemania X7 where Trish stood up to Vince McMahon (Mickie: “You were totally sleeping with him!”) and then he died soon after. Now she has a #1 contenders match and might get to be in the ring with Trish! Mickie starts crying and Trish suddenly can’t remember what she came here for. Sounds like a delayed breakup.

Here’s Matt Striker to teach us something. His blackboard says Family Values, which have been forgotten. Like working mothers. What happened to mothers who did work when they weren’t on their back? Striker wants to know where the fathers are, but here in Massachusetts, they’re probably marrying each other.

Striker brings up the gay marriage law in Massachusetts and says “that’s the sort of thing that is ruining our country.” The people here are uneducated and that’s where he comes in. He’ll be your father figure! There’s a line in there that wasn’t good when it aired and has aged even more horribly. That would be “Here’s Matt Striker.”

Chris Nowinski and Dusty Rhodes both apply to be General Manager.

Victoria vs. Mickie James

The winner gets Trish, on commentary, for the title at New Year’s Revolution. Victoria starts fast with the spinning side slam for two but a standing moonsault hits knees. Mickie slugs away to knock her into the corner as Trish sounds nervous about the idea of facing Trish. Victoria comes back with a quickly broken Boston crab so it’s the MickieDT to give Mickie the pin and make Trish a little more anxious.

Rating: D+. Another match that didn’t have the time to go anywhere and that’s fine. You’re only going to get so much out of a short match like this, which is even more frustrating when these two are capable of doing more. The women’s division has been three people for a long time now and that needs to change. I mean it probably won’t, but it should.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: HHH vs. Kane

HHH charges into a clothesline to start and Kane hammers away in the corner. The big choke has HHH in more trouble so he goes to the knee. Kane whips him over the corner for the big crash to the floor though and we take a break. Back with HHH hitting a spinebuster but the sleeper is broken in a hurry.

The powerslam sends HHH down again but HHH rolls outside before the top rope clothesline can launch. Back in and the facebuster connects, only to have Kane kick the referee down by mistake. The distraction lets HHH pull out the sledgehammer but here’s the Big Show. Kane gets back up and it’s a double chokeslam for the slow three.

Rating: C-. This was another storyline match but at least they had some time to make it work out a little better. HHH vs. Big Show is a fine enough match, but it’s a little strange to see a Tag Team Champion in a singles match. Much like the women’s division, it’s not like Kane and Show have much competition though so there aren’t many other options.

John Cena vs. Daivari

Non-title, only Cena is blindfolded and yep that’s a major hometown pop. Daivari claps to get Cena’s attention and Cena misses a charge. A slap to the back of the head annoys Cena again and Daivari even talks some trash. Believe it or not that’s not a good idea as Cena gets in a shot to the face. Cena starts pointing for the YES/NO chants from the crowd but Angle gets in a cheap shot. Cena catches Daivari anyway though and it’s the STFU for the fast tap.

Rating: D. These matches almost never work but the fans helping Cena here and keeping it short made this a lot easier to get through. Angle vs. Cena has been done for weeks now though and I really don’t need to see any more of it, even an offshoot like this. At least the hometown boy wins for once though, which shouldn’t be that big of a surprise.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a theme show and those can be hit and miss. They did what they needed to do for the Chamber though and that’s a good thing. There were a few other things going on and those feuds are only decent. I’ll give them points for having SOMETHING during the December lull though, as that isn’t often the case. Not a bad show, but it was almost all about one idea and if you didn’t care for it, you weren’t getting much out of this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 5, 2005
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

We’re closing in on the final pay per view of the year and the Raw vs. Smackdown theme seems to be continuing. That’s not the most thrilling idea in the world but it’s not like Armageddon has ever been an important show in the first place. Hopefully the build works out well so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Joey talks about Ric Flair being arrested for road rage last week, which will be addressed on the Cutting Edge. This screams bad impersonation somewhere along the lines.

Here’s Vince McMahon, who drives a garbage truck into the arena. There are two chairs and a podium in the ring so here’s Eric Bischoff to face the music. Bischoff is looking rather upset and talks about what this job means to him. The fans are already singing the Goodbye Song as Vince talks about how he’s fair. Everyone should deserve their day in court so tonight is the trial of Eric Bischoff. Vince calls out Bischoff’s lawyer, the Coach, and Bischoff doesn’t seem impressed. Coach: “My client Eric Bischoff is an a******.”

Bischoff is paid to provide an exciting show and deserves a raise. Now we get to the prosecutor: Mick Foley. Mick says no one has ever done more for Raw than Bischoff, who told the fans about a title change on January 4, 1999, which gave the company a lead in the Monday Night Wars which they never released. Vince says they’re going to WWE Court and the decision will be announced by the end of the night.

Tag Team Titles: Kane/Big Show vs. Val Venis/Viscera vs. Tyson Tomko/Snitsky vs. Heart Throbs

Kane and Big Show are defending in a warmup before they face Rey Mysterio and Batista at Armageddon. House is cleaned in a hurry but Viscera manages a running splash on Kane. That earns him a double chokeslam to send him outside, with Show throwing Antonio onto him. Back in and a triple chokeslam to Antonio, Tomko and Venis is good for three pins at once. Total squash, which is impressive against six people.

We go to the court with Judge Vince McMahon, who is flanked by Bailiff Chris Masters. After taking his feet off the table, Mick calls in Stephanie McMahon, complete with music, as his first witness. She and Shane both think Bischoff should be removed from office and we see exhibit A: the kiss from Halloween 2002. Coach: “I object!” Vince: “SHUT UP!”

Mickie James vs. Victoria

Trish Stratus, Torrie Wilson and Candice Michelle are all here. Mickie snapmares her down to start for the basement dropkick as Lawler is drooling extra hard this week. Victoria manages to send things outside though and the other women get in some cheap shots. Back in and Victoria stands on her chest before hitting the standing moonsault for two.

Mickie’s arm is sent into the buckle and then the mat, followed by a clothesline to take her down again. Mickie gets a hurricanrana out of the corner to start the comeback and a spinning kick to the face drops Victoria. Torrie gets on the apron and is dragged inside, allowing Candice to distract Mickie. A rollup gives Victoria the pin despite Trish’s best efforts.

Rating: D+. This is one of the matches that makes the future generations of Divas all the more frustrating. They put together a coherent story here with the wrestlers doing the wrestling and the eye candy being there for their most basic purposes. It can be done at an acceptable (ok barely acceptable) level but it just wouldn’t be the case most of the time.

Post match, Mickie looks incensed that Trish couldn’t help her more.

Back in court, Tajiri, through a translator, talks about how he was a star in ECW but was wasted on Raw. Now he wants a pregnant rhinoceros to violate Bischoff, and then that he get fired. Coach, now with matchmaking powers, makes Tajiri vs. HHH. With Tajiri gone, Mick brings in Moolah and Mae Young.

Post break, Mae: “And that’s why Eric Bischoff has no penis.” Foley gives us exhibit B: Mae kissing and Bronco Bustering Bischoff at Bad Blood 2003. Coach blames Mae for being oversexed as Bischoff is about to be sick. With that out of the way, Coach gets to call Chris Masters as his first witness. Masters, with no shirt and after removing his hat…..is instantly accused of perjury because his real name is Chris Mordetzky so he’s disqualified from testifying. Vince: “Bailiff, if you would please remove yourself.” I chuckled a few times in there so they’re off to a good start.

Shawn Michaels and Shelton Benjamin are ready for their main event tag match. We hear some of Shelton’s amateur credentials but Shawn points out his lack of recent success around here. See, Shawn might not have the best reputation, but he’s successful. So does Shelton want to win, or make friends? Shelton seems to get something out of the idea.

Coach has a special witness coming in.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Lance Cade

Chavo slugs away to start but gets sent over the top in a hurry. Cade rams him into the post as the EDDIE chants start up. Back in and Chavo hits a dropkick before slugging away. Cade grabs Chavo and drives him into the corner though and shows him how to give a real beating. A suplex is countered into a DDT though and Chavo hits the frog splash for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. This was little more than a showcase match for Chavo and that’s not a bad thing. Chavo is a fine choice for a midcard hand and putting him into a story here or there isn’t going to hurt anything. I’m a little surprised at how fast Cade and Trevor Murdoch have fallen though. Yeah they won the titles, but you would think they would have done something else before dropping them.

Coach’s witness is Daivari, who says that Bischoff was a fair man who gave him his job back and a chance to make a name for himself. Vince, however, has his headphones in. Vince: “Sorry, I was listening to Ashlee Simpson on my new iPod.” Never mind repeating it because we’ll be having a recess. Mick is happy and busts out the Moon Pies and RC Cola.

It’s time for the debut of the Cutting Edge, with Edge and Lita promising to offend everyone and ask the hard questions. Lita doesn’t mind Edge staring at various parts of her and brings up Edge yelling at Dmitri Young at Survivor Series. As for tonight, Ric Flair isn’t here tonight and Edge thinks it’s out of fear. Edge says Flair is now the mug shot posin, handcuff wearin, road rage commitin convict!

Cue Sgt. Slaughter and Michael Hayes to break this up (Lita: “AKA two legends who now make a living kissing Vince McMahon’s a**! Edge: “Wait, Michael, someone told you I had a bottle of Jack Daniels and an eight ball down here didn’t they?”) with Hayes saying he doesn’t get kids today.

They don’t have any respect for the business the legends like the two of them and Flair build. Hayes respects Flair and everything he’s done around here. He’ll give Flair the benefit of the doubt and asks Edge how many main events he’s been in. How many arenas has he sold out so the people had to be turned away? How many World Titles has he had?

Edge says cut the mic and says Terry Gordy isn’t coming to help him because Gordy is dead. Hayes: “The only reason you have this show is you’re banging Matt Hardy’s ex-girlfriend.” That’s enough for Edge, who slugs Hayes down and low blows Slaughter. Hayes gets back up and fires off in the corner but a briefcase to the head takes him down. We’ve seen this kind of thing before but it was nice having someone different in the role for a change.

HHH vs. Tajiri

Tajiri goes straight to the strikes in the corner early on but HHH clotheslines him from behind to break up the handspring elbow. The second attempt connects but the Tarantula is broken up. HHH suplexes him down and hits the Pedigree for the quick pin.

Simon Dean is the next witness but the Boogeyman pops up instead. He says a lot, breaks the clock, and disappears, sending Vince into confusion and Mick into another Moon Pie.

HHH runs into Big Show in the back and a challenge is teased for later.

Mick calls his next witness in the form of Maria, who wants to be questioned by Mr. Socko. Foley slowly agrees and Maria goes into a rant involving several big words about how Bischoff abused his power and should be fired. That’s it for Maria, and everyone, save for Bischoff, watches as she leaves. Vince says that’s enough and closing arguments will take place in the arena.

Smackdown Rebound.

Kurt Angle/Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin/Shawn Michaels

Daivari is at ringside and not refereeing as per Vince’s orders. Shelton and Carlito start things off with Carlito getting his arm barred. A belly to belly lets Shelton hammer away even more and Carlito is rather upset (possibly about his hair). Angle comes in to take Shelton to the mat by the leg but Angle has to escape the exploder. The Dragon Whip works instead and we take a break.

Back with Shawn charging into Carlito’s elbow in the corner but getting over to the corner for a tag to Shelton anyway. Angle gets knocked off the apron but a Daivari distraction lets Angle knock Shelton down. Back in and Angle unloads in the corner before snapping off the overhead belly to belly.

The fans are behind Shelton, even as Angle German suplexes him into a waistlock. The Angle Slam is countered into a DDT and the hot tag brings in Shawn. House is cleaned, including the forearm into the nipup and a bunch of clotheslines. There’s the top rope elbow so Shawn tunes up the band, only to have Shelton tag himself in. Shelton misses a top rope clothesline though and Carlito gets the easy pin.

Rating: C. This was a story based match and that’s not a bad thing. The idea here was to show that Shelton needs a lot of work and given how much he’s been losing as of late, a heel turn might not be the worst thing for him. They’re way past the point where he can just bounce back so a big change is all they can really do.

Post match Shawn is incensed but Shelton won’t hear it.

Vince and Stephanie arrive in a limo, because they left….I guess? HHH pops up to say Bischoff should say but Vince thinks it’s just so HHH can manipulate him. He’ll take it under advisement, and then introduces HHH to Stephanie for the awkward staring.

We go into the arena for the closing arguments, with Foley just saying Bischoff is bad at his job. Bischoff says he makes WWE money with ideas like the Elimination Chamber. Maybe they could use it again at the next Raw pay per view for the WWE Championship. Vince knows what it’s like to be hated in this industry so he should be able to sympathize with Bischoff. Just let him keep his job so they can make money. Vince seems to think about it but here’s John Cena to interrupt.

Cena is here to point out everything Bischoff does and how much fun he’s taken away from this show. Like when he censors the SUCK in Kurt Angle’s YOU SUCK. Cena asks the 10,000 witnesses here in the building about Bischoff staying, but they seem to want him gone. The two letters that sum up Bischoff’s career are FU so Vince asks the fans about the Elimination Chamber. They seem pleased, so the match is on. Bischoff won’t be there for it though, because HE’S FIRED. Cena gives Bischoff the FU and Vince throws him in the back of the garbage truck. Vince even drives it out of the arena to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There wasn’t much here other than the Bischoff deal, which is long overdue at this point. Bischoff has done everything possible as the evil boss and it’s time to give us something new. The rest of the show just came and went though with little wrestling of note as we need to fill time before New Year’s Revolution. Hopefully things can pick up in the next few weeks, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 28, 2005
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with Survivor Series and unless Raw is doing something at Armageddon, we’re building towards New Year’s Revolution. John Cena retained the World Title on Sunday and needs a new challenger now that Kurt Angle is out of the way. I’m not sure who that is going to be though and that could be a problem. Let’s get to it.

Here is Survivor Series if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

An annoyed Eric Bischoff is in the ring to start things off. He’s about to call every Raw wrestler out here because he needs to give them a piece of his mind. Last night, Raw let him down and failures like that will not be tolerated. Bischoff demands everyone out here right now so he can fire the first person he sees.….so here’s Vince McMahon. Vince: “How do you do? I’m Vince McMahon, the Chairman of the Board.” Vince talks about Bischoff failing at everything he promised to do last night. Bischoff tries to explain himself but is told to shut up.

Vince: “YOUR RECORD SUCKS! If Monday Night Raw is a failure, they’re going to perceive ME as a failure!” Bischoff has one job tonight: set a goal of any kind and accomplish it, or Vince can look for his replacement. That’s fine with Bischoff, who doesn’t think Vince can find much of a replacement. Almost on cue, here’s the returning Shane McMahon and Bischoff looks like he just ate a bad chimichanga. Shane says he’s never liked Bischoff and is looking forward to seeing him go. In case you’re not that bright, Shane clarifies that he will be the replacement if Bischoff fails.

Shawn Michaels vs. Carlito

Carlito is out to prove that he should have been the captain of Team Raw. The apple goes into Shawn’s face to start and Carlito knocks him to the floor. Shawn chops away but gets knocked down again, setting up the headlock on the mat. Back up and Shawn tries to skin the cat but gets knocked outside, setting up a slingshot dive to the floor. Shawn is right back up for a chop off in the corner, followed by a middle rope crossbody for two on Carlito.

The forearm into the nipup doesn’t quite work as Shawn’s knee gives out and we take a break. Back with Carlito staying on the knee until he fights out of the corner. The moonsault press takes too long to set up though and Carlito crotches him down. That earns Carlito some elbows to the face and now the top rope elbow connects. Sweet Chin Music is countered into a DDT for two but Shawn escapes a Roll of the Dice. Now the superkick can put Carlito away.

Rating: C+. This was one of the better Carlito matches I can remember, though a match with Shawn might not be the best measuring stick of Carlito’s abilities. Maybe he was fired up for some reason but it was a stronger performance than usual from him. Granted when your normal isn’t very good, any improvement is a nice thing to see.

Kurt Angle storms in to Bischoff’s office and says last night was the biggest screwjob in the history of Survivor Series. Daivari comes in to rant as well. Angle wants the World Title tonight.

Clips from last night’s main event.

Video on HHH beating Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match.

Kurt Angle vs. Maria

Daivari is referee and yells at Maria, so the regular referee pulls him off. The referee hits Daivari in the mouth so Daivari stomps him down and puts on the camel clutch. Angle comes out and hugs Maria….followed by the Angle Slam. John Cena runs in for the save as this feud must continue.

Post match (the bell rang), Chris Masters runs in for a Masterlock on Cena so Angle can hammer away. Bischoff comes out and has a main event: an anything goes triple threat submission match for the World Title. Angle gives Cena an Angle Slam for a bonus.

Post break, we look at what we just saw.

Trish Stratus/Mickie James/Ashley Massaro vs. Victoria/Candice Michelle/Torrie Wilson

Mickie sends Torrie into the buckle to start and it’s off to Ashley for an ax handle to the arm. Torrie pulls her into the corner though and Victoria comes in for a wishbone. A snap suplex gives Victoria two and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long and Victoria misses the slingshot flip legdrop so Mickie can get the hot tag. Mickie cleans house and there’s a hurricanrana out of the corner to drop Victoria. Trish takes Torrie down and Mickie hits Stratusfaction to finish Victoria off.

Rating: D+. What are you expecting here? They made no secrets about the fact that the women are in there to look good and the wrestling is secondary. It does help that Trish vs. Mickie is turning into a story, though we could be a long way off from them getting to the point. That’s the only real opponent on the horizon for Trish at the moment and that’s not a good sign.

Shane comes in to see Bischoff, who is confident that he’ll accomplish his goal. Shane didn’t think much of the Maria deal so Bischoff calls him a member of the Lucky Sperm Club (that family has some weird clubs). Bischoff winds up against the wall and the threat seems to make its intended point.

Daivari assures Angle that he’s ringing the bell the first time that Angle grabs a hammerlock. Masters comes in and says he knew something was up. That’s why he’s gone to Vince and they’ll be having an impartial referee tonight.

Video on the European tour.

Trevor Murdoch vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton knocks him to the floor in a hurry and hits a big clothesline off the top. Back in and the Stinger Splash misses so Murdoch can stomp away. The Dragon Whip gives Shelton two but he misses another top rope clothesline. A Downward Spiral gives Murdoch two but Shelton is back with the Stinger Splash from behind. Murdoch sends him face first into the middle buckle though and a rollup with trunks finishes Benjamin.

Rating: D+. That’s not something you expect to see and I still can’t get what they’re doing this for. The losing streak is something that has been done for years but who looked at Shelton and thought it was the right move for him? Shelton’s momentum has been gone for months now and I have no idea why they’re giving him this story.

Here’s HHH for a chat. HHH knows that some people don’t think he’s compassionate but he took care of Ric Flair. He made sure Flair is in a nice hospital room with a plasma TV on the wall and the USA Network included. His advice to Flair is easy: stay down, because he’s done. There is nothing left for Flair to do after back to back pay per view matches with HHH. There’s no shame in losing to the best, so Flair needs to go home after this is over. The fans don’t like that but HHH says that’s what separates them from him: they knew something needed to be done about Flair but HHH did it.

There is no one alive who will look him in the eye and say something to his face, so here’s Big Show to interrupt. Show has known him for a long time but now HHH needs to hear it to his face: he is a piece of s***. The fist is held up next to HHH’s face so does he have the guts to fight Show now? HHH tries to say something and the mic is knocked out of his hand. That’s going to be it for HHH, who bails in a hurry.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Kane/Big Show vs. Snitsky/Tyson Tomko

Snitsky and Tomko are challenging and we’re joined in progress with Tomko hammering Kane down for two. It’s off to Snitsky to choke on the ropes until Kane sends him face first into the mat. Show comes in with the big side slam as everything breaks down. Kane hits the top rope clothesline to Snitsky and Show chokeslams Tomko to retain in a hurry.

Raw World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Masters vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and it’s submission only. Cena charges straight at Angle but the numbers have him in trouble early. Masters and Angle take turns dropping elbows on him but Angle sends Masters to the floor. That leaves Angle to slip out of an FU attempt and grab the ankle lock until Masters makes the save with the Masterlock to Angle. That’s broken up by Cena so Masters Masterlocks him.

Angle makes a very delayed save and hammers away, while managing to tell Masters that he sucks. The ankle lock has Masters in trouble so Cena hits a top rope ax handle for another save. Cena unloads on Angle until Masters breaks up the Shuffle. The straps come down and Angle grabs the chair, which is kicked straight back into his face. Cena smashes the chair on Masters’ leg and grabs an STF to retain. Coach: “WHERE DID CENA LEARN THE STF???” Make your own jokes.

Rating: C-. This was a weird one but I remember watching it live and being very surprised by the STF. It was a good surprise and while I know Cena’s version doesn’t have the best reputation, it was a great debut for the hold. That came out of nowhere and gives Cena a new weapon to use. The FU is good but now he can switch things up a bit, which is a smart idea.

We cut to Vince, who says that next week, the trash is taken out.

Overall Rating: C. They got out of Survivor Series mode here and that’s what they needed to do. There’s only so much that you can do when you have the one big story going on for so many weeks and it was time to move on. Now we have some fresh feuds and hopefully some of them can pick up the pace around here. I liked this well enough and maybe things can improve a bit as they hit December.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2005
Date: November 27, 2005
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s all about Raw vs. Smackdown as the big elimination tag is all that matters around here. That’s in addition to the Raw World Title match, which should be another good but not exactly thrilling showdown. I’m not sure what to expect for most of the show, but that elimination tag is the centerpiece of the show. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence is almost all about Raw vs. Smackdown, as it should be.

Booker T. vs. Chris Benoit

Match #1 in a best of seven series for the vacant US Title. Benoit gets backed into the corner to start and it’s a surprisingly clean break. Booker slams him down but Benoit pops back up for a standoff. Some forearms puts Booker on the floor and we’re still in low first gear. They go to the mat with Benoit easily getting the better of things and cranking on the leg to limited success.

That’s enough for Booker to take another breather on the floor. Back in and Booker elbows him in the face so Benoit hits him with a running forearm. That just earns Benoit a side slam for two and the armbar goes on. Make that an abdominal stretch but Benoit fights out again and hits an elbow. Booker elbows him into the corner and gets two off a neckbreaker.

A reverse chinlock doesn’t last long so Booker goes with the jumping kick to the face instead. Benoit grabs a quick dragon screw legwhip but the Sharpshooter is countered into a small package for two. The rolling German suplexes work a bit better but Sharmell’s distraction delays the Swanton, allowing Booker to roll away. A rollup with feet on the ropes and Sharmell grabbing the leg is enough for Booker to get the pin.

Rating: B. This was better than their Smackdown match as they were able to build things up a bit better. It’s a good way to start off the show, though it’s not like these matches matter all that much until we get to what is more than likely going to be a seventh match. That sounds good in theory, but it wouldn’t surprise me to see the match get a little boring by that point.

Eric Bischoff meets with Vince McMahon in the back and talks about the history of screwjobs at Survivor Series. Tonight, Bischoff Screws Cena. Cue Cena: “So Eric Bischoff screws guys.” Bischoff leaves and Cena shakes Vince’s hand. In a legendary line, Vince: “Keep it up my n****.” Vince struts off as Booker and Sharmell look flabbergasted. I can’t believe this is uncensored on the Network.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending and this is interpromotional after Melina and MNM kidnapped Trish on Raw. Mickie James and Melina are here as well. Trish jumps her to start and sends Melina outside for the big dive onto all three of them. Back in and a hair toss sends Melina down and the headscissors does the same. Melina gets in a knee to the back and a kick to the ribs.

They trade boot chokes in the corner and but Melina goes after Mickie, leaving MNM to try the Snapshot on Trish. That’s broken up by a referee actually paying attention and the two of them are ejected. We hit a modified surfboard, which I’m sure is not just an excuse to put Trish in various positions. The Matrish is broken up with a shot to the ribs for two but the Stratusphere works just fine. Stratusfaction is broken up but Mickie saves Trish from a cheap shot to the back. A top rope bulldog retains the title.

Rating: D+. There was only so much you could do here as there is no secret to the fact that this is setting up Mickie challenging Trish for the title at some point in the future. Melina hadn’t gotten good in the ring yet so for now she’s glorified eye candy who can do a passable match. In other words, she’s a traditional Diva of the era.

We recap HHH vs. Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match. Flair beat him last month in a cage match so now it’s about ending each other in the way WWE ends people.

HHH vs. Ric Flair

Non-title and Last Man Standing. HHH jumps him in the aisle and the beating is on in a hurry with Flair’s robe and belt being ripped off. Flair gets in a kendo stick to the ribs (Flair using a kendo stick is just wrong) and they head into the crowd with HHH managing to backdrop him back to ringside. A suplex has Flair in more trouble inside and the pace slows a bit.

They go outside again and a screwdriver to the head busts Flair open in a hurry. Back in and some kneedrops make the blood flow even more and it’s already back to the floor. HHH takes too long setting up the announcers’ table though and Flair sends him face first into the steps. A spinebuster on the floor cuts Flair off again though as this has been one hope spot after another with HHH dropping him every time. HHH grabs a microphone to yell but Flair grabs him low.

That earns him a trip into the announcers’ table but Flair backdrops him through the other one in the first really big spot of the match. HHH is up at eight so Flair takes him back inside for some chops. Some right hands put Flair down as well so he hits HHH low to even things up. A chair to the head puts HHH down and Flair bites at the head, followed by a crotching against the post.

The chop block takes HHH down again but the Figure Four is broken up. Flair doesn’t seem to mind as he wraps the knee around the post and smashes it with a chair. NOW the Figure Four can go on and Flair even grabs the rope for a bonus. HHH taps so Flair can claim a bit of a moral victory and the hold is let go. A shot to the face knocks Flair into the corner and the steps to the head give HHH five.

There’s the drop toehold to send HHH face first into the steps but he staggers up and hits a Pedigree. Flair pulls himself up so there’s a second Pedigree. He’s up again so they hit the same sequence one more time. Flair gets to his feet a third time so it’s a sledgehammer shot to the….something well hidden by a camera cut but it’s finally enough to finish Flair off.

Rating: B. It’s good but it’s nowhere near as good as the cage match. As usual, the ending didn’t work very well as they were just doing the same stuff over and over again until a big hammer shot put Flair down. Thankfully they didn’t waste a lot of time with the near falls throughout the match, which are always annoying in a match like this. It wasn’t great and it should have been shorter but it worked well enough.

Randy Orton and JBL try to fire up Team Smackdown but Batista comes in and takes care of it for them.

Here are Edge and Lita for a chat. They’re changing things up around here because they are going to have their own talk show with the Cutting Edge. With that out of the way, Edge calls out Detroit Tiger Dmitri Young, who plays for a bad team and is fat you see. Detroit sports jokes abound but Young asks about Edge’s World Title. Edge and Lita are out of here, just like Ford and GM.

We recap John Cena vs. Kurt Angle. Kurt has beaten him a few times but never for the title so now he has Daivari as his personal referee. It’s the final showdown and this should be a good one.

Raw World Title: Kurt Angle vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and Daivari is guest referee. The place goes coconuts for Cena as the star power continues to rise. Angle wastes no time in taking him down by the leg and cranks on the ankle a bit. Some shoulders put Angle on the floor and DANG the fans are into Cena. Daivari won’t let him go after Angle though and things settle down a bit. Back in and Angle stomps him down in the corner until Cena snaps off a release fisherman’s suplex.

That’s not even worthy of a count so Angle grabs the ankle lock. Cena makes the rope so Daivari kicks his hand away. With that not working, Cena kicks him away and slaps Daivari in the face. Daivari is ready for the DQ but Angle gets sent into him for the double knockdown. Angle posts Cena and another referee comes down to count two. Some suplexes give Angle some twos and we hit the waistlock. Another suplex drops Cena again and the fans get even louder.

It’s off to the weird cousin of an STF on Cena but Angle switches to a regular chinlock pretty quickly. Cena suplexes his way to freedom and the comeback is on….so Angle clotheslines the referee on purpose. A low blow drops Cena and the Angle Slam gets two from the third referee. Angle’s top rope superplex gets two more but he misses the moonsault. The FU is broken up and Angle decks the third referee so here’s one from Smackdown. Angle tries to hold him back as Cena DDTs Daivari and then FU’s Angle to retain.

Rating: C+. They had a good match in there somewhere but egads they had too much going on at the same time here. When you have a fourth referee climbing over the three down referees, you’re only going to get so far. Cena needs a fresh opponent now as he’s beaten Angle more than once now so just let him do something else. That being said, who is there right now?

Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long

Palmer Cannon is here with Teddy and there is a referee from both shows. Long posts to start and then ducks a clothesline, meaning it’s time to dance. With that out of the way, it’s more dancing and the required crane pose. Cannon gets drawn onto the apron and Bischoff gets in some choking. A sleeper goes on until Long takes off his own shoe and hits Eric in the head. Eric is ticked….and we’ve got the Boogeyman. Choking into a pumphandle slam drops Bischoff and the one shoed Long gets the pin.

Rating: D-. Teddy’s dancing is the only thing that keeps this from failing because it always makes me smile. This was a complete waste of time but they had to have something in there to stretch the show out a bit. It wasn’t a match of course but what else were you expecting out of something like this?

Both teams get cheered to the ring by their locker rooms.

We recap Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown. Back at Homecoming, Bischoff turned out the lights on a Smackdown six man tag so a bunch of invasions started happening. Therefore, let’s have an elimination tag for brand supremacy.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Shawn Michaels, Kane, Big Show, Carlito, Chris Masters

Smackdown: Batista, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio

Entrances take forever of course and Rey gets some very loud EDDIE chants. Orton takes Shawn into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. Shawn gets in a whip to the other corner to set up some chops as commentary is already bickering. Orton gets in a slam but misses the knee drop so it’s off to Masters. The knee the face works fine on him but it’s quickly off to Lashley, who tosses Masters around.

Carlito gets the tag so Lashley pulls him in and hits a running powerslam for two. It’s back to Shawn, who gets knocked down as well. There’s the Dominator to Carlito but Kane saves Shawn from the same fate. A Kane chokeslam from the apron lets Shawn get rid of Lashley, who wasn’t nearly the factor you would have bet on after the last few weeks. Rey comes in and dropkicks Shawn in the knee as Cole says he’d love to see this dream match. I know he has a short attention span but he can’t remember something from less than two weeks ago?

Kane comes in and gets dropkicked down but is right back up for a big boot. A backbreaker gets two on Rey and we hit the backbreaker. Rey fights out in a hurry though and it’s off to Batista for the shoulders in the corner. A spear into the spinebuster gets rid of Kane but here’s Show for an immediate chokeslam. That’s good for two but Kane is back up for a double chokeslam to get rid of Batista. JBL’s middle rope shoulder is pulled out of the air by Big Show but Orton snaps his throat across the top.

The Clothesline From JBL into the 619 into the RKO into another Clothesline From JBL into the springboard seated senton FINALLY gets rid of Big Show and we’re down to 3-3. Everything breaks down and JBL hits Shawn with a fall away slam on the floor as Masters plants Rey. Carlito comes in for a legdrop and the chinlock goes on. Rey fights up and gets a blind tag from JBL, who blasts Carlito with the Clothesline for the pin.

Masters comes in next and gets hammered down as Shawn is still out on the floor. Rey comes back in and avoids a charge into the post, setting up the 619. Dropping the Dime gets rid of Masters and it’s down to Shawn vs. Orton/Mysterio/JBL. Rey throws Shawn back in and hits the 619 but the West Coast Pop is Sweet Chin Musiced out of the air for the pin. JBL tries the Clothesline but Shawn ducks and superkicks him out for the back to back pins in about fifteen seconds.

That leaves us with Shawn vs. Orton but neither finisher can hit. Orton bails to the floor so Shawn hits a slingshot dive as the fans want Undertaker. Back in and Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup but JBL is still here and brings in a chair. That earns him another superkick but Shawn walks into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was good enough and was absolutely the main event of the show. Even though this was for completely meaningless bragging rights, it worked this time because that was something fresh. It’s the difference between doing it once and doing it every year: this time felt like they had built something up instead of throwing it out there because it was November. It also helps when you have Shawn at his best playing the underdog and Orton being great at this match. This nearly identical formula worked in 2003 and it worked here too.

Post match the Smackdown locker room comes in to celebrate….and we’ve got druids. They bring out a casket and stand it upright as the gong hits. Lightning strikes the casket and it is lit on fire, with Undertaker walking out. Undertaker destroys the roster as the Ortons get to the outside. The big staredown with the throat slit ends the show.

Overall Rating: B+. For a show that was almost entirely about the main event, this was actually a very good show with only the Long vs. Bischoff non-match being bad. There are several good matches throughout and it doesn’t drag at all. The ending was a bit obvious as everyone was waiting on Undertaker, but that’s not always the worst thing. Check this out if you need something to watch as it’s a very impressive show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 21, 2005
Location: Hallam FM Arena, Sheffield, England
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler

Things are back to normal after last week’s Eddie Guerrero Tribute Show and as a bonus, it’s the go home show for Survivor Series. Throw in the fact that they’re taped from overseas and this is one of the more detail heavy shows in a long time. Now hopefully it’s also a good one to get things back on track. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Raw vs. Smackdown, which wasn’t touched on last week.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Team Raw to get things going, followed by Eric Bischoff. Eric brags about the team but doesn’t like rumors about Team Smackdown showing up here tonight. He doesn’t buy it though because Smackdown saw what happened when they invade. Smackdown isn’t coming because of his soldiers and his strength but Big Show grabs the mic. He and Kane aren’t Bischoff’s anything….and Smackdown is here in the back.

Shawn and company head to the back, even as Bischoff screams about it being a setup. Post break the fight is on in a hurry. The street fight ensues with Batista being chokeslammed onto the hood of a car as security comes in for the save. As banged up as Batista’s shoulder was around this point, that would seem like a way to give him an out at Survivor Series.

Trevor Murdoch vs. Ric Flair

Non-title. Flair starts fast with a backdrop so Murdoch hammers away at him in the corner. That earns him some chops but Flair gets punched out of the air. An elbow gives Murdoch two and we hit the seated abdominal stretch. Murdoch misses the knee drop though and Flair starts in on said knee but the Figure Four is broken up. A charge misses in the corner though and Flair grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here and it’s not like losing to Ric Flair is going to hurt your career. Then again it’s not like Murdoch has anything to lose at this point as he’s half of a tag team who already lost the titles to some monsters. There wasn’t much to see here because there wasn’t much here, which is fine for a quick opener like this.

Post match HHH pops up on screen and promises to end Flair at Survivor Series.

Rob Conway vs. Tajiri

Joined in progress after a break and here’s JBL to jump both of them after literally three seconds shown.

Post match (even though there wasn’t a bell), JBL wants Chris Masters out here right now. Bischoff comes out instead and says he thought they got rid of all the trash. JBL can have a match tonight, but it’s going to be against Shawn Michaels. That’s fine with JBL, who leaves through the crowd.

Here’s a look at John Cena on MadTV.

Kurt Angle vs. Shelton Benjamin

The SUCK is still censored. There’s no referee, but here’s Daivari to take the job. After a weapons check to Shelton, we’re ready to go with Angle headlocking him to the mat. That earns him an armdrag into an armbar but Angle is right up with an overhead belly to belly. Angle stomps away and gets two off another suplex. We hit the waistlock to keep Shelton in trouble so he has to elbow his way to freedom. A running forearm and some clotheslines set up a Samoan drop to plant Angle.

Shelton flips out of a German suplex and hits a Dragon Whip to send things outside. Angle can’t hit the German suplex off the apron but Shelton can hit a DDT onto the apron. Back in and Angle grabs the ankle lock but Shelton makes the rope. Shelton makes the rope but Daivari doesn’t break the hold, nor does he count the pin when Shelton reverses into a rollup. Instead Daivari turns it over so Angle is on top for a fast counted pin, sending Joey into hysterics.

Rating: C. This was a match built around the story and that’s fine. Shelton loses again, but at least he didn’t lose clean (as if it matters to him at this point). The crooked referee thing has been done before but it’s fine for a plot device in a feud like Angle vs. Cena. Angle being the better wrestler than Cena and still needing to cheat to beat him is a good plot device and hopefully they can do something good on Sunday.

Post match, Angle talks about how he and Daivari have been abused by the people. They’re both proud Americans but these people will cheer Cena and boo Daivari? As a result, Bischoff has named Daivari as Angle’s permanent referee, including at Survivor Series. This is announced as a shock for those fans who don’t pay that much attention.

Cena pops up on screen and calls Angle a ham sandwich. He’s going on a backstage tour to find out what wrestlers think of Angle, starting in the women’s locker room. Candice drops her towel and Cena can barely talk but the other women run him off. Next up it’s Snitsky, who is rubbing Tomko’s shoulders. Snitsky: “It’s a kink!” Cena leaves, with a little vomit in his mouth.

Another door is opened and it’s the Boogeyman, who sings a little London Bridge Is Falling Down. Cena looks scared, closes the door, opens it again, and gets “My fair lady”. With that out of the way, it’s time to come into the arena so Cena can poll the fans on Angle. As luck would have it, most of them think he sucks. Angle doesn’t like it and the fight is on with Cena clearing the ring and taking off his shirt to a well received reaction.

HHH vs. Val Venis

They fight to the floor and HHH uses a chair for the DQ in about thirty seconds.

Post match, HHH unloads with the chair and adds a Pedigree (HHH: “FLAIR! FLAIR!”) for a bonus.

Undertaker is back at Survivor Series.

Candice Michelle vs. Mickie James

Victoria and Trish Stratus are the seconds. Candice hits the Go Daddy dance to start and then lays on the ropes, earning herself some chops from Mickie. A baseball slide takes out Victoria….and here are two masked men to kidnap Trish. The distraction lets Victoria get in a cheap shot so Candice can steal the pin.

Post break, the masked men have Trish tied up in the back. They unmask as MNM and Melina is here to demand a Women’s Title match at Survivor Series. After taking the tape off of Trish’s mouth, the fight seems to be set. Melina kicks Trish in the head for a bonus.

Lawler goes off to help Trish.

Survivor Series rundown.

Maria is mesmerized by Shawn Michaels’ new book Heartbreak and Triumph. Shawn comes in and says that tonight he’d rather talk about his match with JBL. Shawn: “The initial contest if you will.” It’s going to be a lumberjack match as per the GM’s orders.

Shawn Michaels vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

The rest of the Raw and Smackdown teams (minus Batista) are at ringside. Shawn slugs away to start but the threat of Sweet Chin Music sends JBL outside. He realizes that it’s right between Big Show and Kane though, meaning it’s time to go back inside. Shawn charges into a boot in the corner and JBL hammers away as the fans are behind him for a change. Weird British people.

Some chops put JBL down for two and Shawn gets two but JBL is right back with a backbreaker for the same. We hit the bearhug but Shawn it out in a hurry, only to get slammed off the top. A hard running shoulder gives JBL two more and the forearms to the back keep Shawn down. Shawn gets sent outside so Orton and company hammer away, meaning it’s a hard glare to get rid of them.

Back from a break with Shawn getting two off a sunset flip, only to be elbowed right back to the floor. Some forearms to the chest get another near fall and JBL throws him outside again. This time Big Show and Kane are there immediately so Shawn can get back in without another beating. JBL knocks him right back down and there’s the fall away slam for two.

The flying forearm connects though and the comeback is on. Instead of going with the superkick though, Shawn dives onto the lumberjacks, which just lets JBL get in a big boot back inside. Shawn knocks him down again and tries the elbow, only to get shoved down by Orton. The Clothesline From JBL misses and Sweet Chin Music connects. Everyone comes in to trade finishers but here’s a taped up Batista with a pipe to take out Big Show and Kane. A spinebuster plants show to wrap things up.

Rating: C+. JBL can be brought up to a good match and that’s what happened here. These two had some nice chemistry together as JBL can do the power stuff and Shawn has the perfect timing so it was always going to be at least decent. They did the right thing with the no contest as there is no need to have one of the big names on either team take a fall. It was the right choice for the right setting and it was even a decent match as a bonus.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one as they had so many things working against them and did what they could. It didn’t help that they had to cram in an extra week of build after last week’s shows had no bearing on the storylines. Couple that with the likely jet lag and the show was only so good. However, with this many things against them, I can understand why the show had so many faults.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Spring cleaning is here.Kurt Angle (The biggest name of all)

Drake Maverick (He was just a boss and occasional wrestler, though his comments on the release are heartbreaking)

Curt Hawkins (Fair enough)

Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson (They’re the biggest surprises)

Heath Slater (You had to know this was coming)

Eric Young (He never caught on so this isn’t a big shock)

Rowan (That spider thing was death)

Sarah Logan (She never did anything on the main roster)

Mike Chioda (He was around FOREVER)

Mike Kanellis (It was Maria’s world and I think he knew it)

EC3 (For the life of me I will never get how they let him just sit there)

Aiden English (Not much of a shock)

Lio Rush (He was finding his calling but dang that’s a fast fall from grace)

Epico/Primo (Yeah I thought they were already gone too)

 

Plus a ton of agents being released/furloughed.  This is a rather nutty day and I’m sure there are going to be even more releases coming throughout the day.  That’s a good thing in a way as a lot of these people have been sitting around doing nothing for months.  I never saw why WWE needed this many people in the first place so cleaning out a lot of the space is a smart move, though not the best news for the wrestlers.  It had to happen though and while unfortunate, it makes business sense.

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 7, 2005
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

Taboo Tuesday has come and gone with the big development being Ric Flair beating HHH in something of an upset. Other than that John Cena is still Raw World Champion and in need of a next challenger. The Raw vs. Smackdown feud is certainly not done thougu and Survivor Series is coming up this month with the brand vs. brand theme. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Joey Styles is quickly introduced as the new commentator.

Most of the roster is around the ring and here’s Eric Bischoff for a chat. He’s looking forward to Raw vs. Smackdown at Survivor Series but he has two more matches to announce: HHH vs. Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match and John Cena defending the Raw World Title against Kurt Angle. As for the Raw team against Smackdown, Big Show and Kane are already in, along with captain Shawn Michaels.

That leaves two spots, so someone needs to step up. Carlito says he’ll do it and promises no more Cabanas because he’s a wrestler. Shelton Benjamin: “Are you high?” Shelton says he deserves the spot so let’s have a qualifying match tonight. Trevor Murdoch thinks he and Lance Cade should be in the match and want their rematch for the titles tonight. Bischoff is game and makes it a hardcore match.

Since Bischoff is handing out matches, Gregory Helms wants one with Rosey and Mickie James wants….a round of applause for Trish Stratus. Bischoff: “Uh….yeah. Whatever.” With that out of the way, Bischoff brings in Edge and Lita because he forgot they were here. Bischoff remembers them walking out on Raw last night so he sends them to Smackdown where Edge can face Batista in a street fight this week. That sends them off, complete with the Goodbye Song.

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin

Joined in progress after a break with Carlito working on a wristlock. Shelton backdrops him to the floor in a heap though and hits a running Blockbuster off the apron. He comes up holding his knee however and it’s time to stomp away. Carlito starts cranking on the leg so Shelton gets smart by pulling on the hair to escape. A toss into the air lets Carlito crash onto his face and the comeback is on, including clotheslines.

Shelton gets two off a bridging northern lights suplex but the top rope clothesline misses. Carlito grabs a DDT for two more (Joey: “Look, his hair is standing on end!”) but Shelton is right back with a Samoan drop. A dropkick to the knee cuts Shelton down again and we hit the half crab. That’s countered into a rollup but Carlito counters the counter and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: D+. It’s the same pains that I’ve had for months now about Shelton and Carlito being the one to beat him makes it even worse. We’re long past the point of the pin not being clean meaning anything as this was another dull match with Carlito winning because WWE saw all of his charisma (which did exist) but nothing to go with it.

Trish Stratus tries to talk to Mickie James about Taboo Tuesday but Mickie cuts her off because they have a tag match tonight.

Trish Stratus/Mickie James vs. Victoria/Candice Michelle

Mickie and Victoria start things off and a quick low bridging from the apron sends Mickie outside. Victoria gets in an elbow to the back and Trish gets knocked off the apron to get her all annoyed. Everything breaks down and Candice is driven into Victoria in the corner. The referee gets rid of Trish but Victoria gets in a shot with Candice’s magic wand for the cheap pin.

Rating: D+. They kept it moving well enough to not be a complete disaster and the addition of Mickie is one of the best things that could have happened to the division at the moment. Trish vs. Mickie is being built up very slowly and that’s something that could make it a big deal. Now as long as they can keep interest up until the match, they could be fine, but that’s easier said than done.

Video on the Raw World Title match at Taboo Tuesday.

Video on Taboo Tuesday.

Big Show and Kane have the most scripted conversation I’ve seen from this era to establish that Kane wants to hurt Cade and Murdoch. This was awful.

Gregory Helms vs. Rosey

Rosey starts fast with some clotheslines and forearms to the back but Helms sends him face first into the middle buckle. That’s too much for Rosey who pounds him back down but misses a Vader Bomb. An enziguri (called a Shining Wizard) finishes Rosey in a hurry.

Tag Team Titles: Kane/Big Show vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Cade and Murdoch are challenging and this is hardcore, much to Joey’s delight. Murdoch wheels out the shopping cart full of weapons and we’re ready to go in a hurry. The threat of a kendo stick sends Cade running while Show chokes Murdoch in the corner. Show gets low bridged to the floor though and Kane gets trashcan lidded out of the air.

That’s it for Cade and Murdoch though as Show is back in, meaning it’s time to clean house in a hurry. They go outside with Murdoch getting a trashcan put over his head for a big boot from Kane. Show clotheslines Cade on the stage and it’s a double chokeslam through the announcers’ table to retain.

Rating: C-. This was as short as it should have been and they kept things in the right setup. There was no reason to go with anything other than Big Show and Kane dominating, which should be the case every time they’re in the ring. Don’t bother with anything more than the two of them wrecking people until someone steals the pin and the titles one day.

Kurt Angle comes out for a match but doesn’t like the YOU SUCK chants. He’s so upset that he says we’re doing this again and goes to the back. His music plays again and there are those chants a second time. Angle gives them ONE MORE CHANCE but then has to rant at them for not having good family values. They are abusing both the First Amendment and ANGLE HIMSELF. We hear about everything Angle has lost for these people so he’s not going to take it anymore. These people suck and he’s out of the main event tonight. Well that’s abrupt.

Post break, Bischoff says Angle can’t do that. If he needs Angle out there though, there needs to be a handpicked referee.

Here’s a bandaged HHH to sit in a chair on the stage for the next match.

Intercontinental Title: Ric Flair vs. Rob Conway

Flair is defending and insists on being introduced as “the man that beat HHH at Taboo Tuesday” to really get under HHH’s skin (Flair would be great at that kind of thing). Flair hiptosses him to start so Conway tries to pick up the pace. You don’t try to leapfrog Flair though as he’s waiting on Conway and pokes him in the eye. Conway gets in a few shots in the corner, only to have Flair go with the testicular claw and some chops. Flair’s top rope shot to the head connects and the Figure Four, with a grab of the rope of course, retains the title.

Rating: C-. Just a match here and there isn’t much to be said about the whole thing. Flair winning over Conway is fine and Conway could have been anyone at this point. They’re doing a nice job of making Flair look like he still has it and it’s not like Conway’s push was even still alive at this point.

Post match HHH is at ringside with a chain but Flair fights him into the crowd for a crash through a table.

Smackdown Rebound.

Lita flashes Bischoff to get Edge out of the street fight but he throws her out.

Shawn Michaels/John Cena vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Masters

The fans chant YOU…..something that is beeped out for one of the more annoying things you’ll see for a good while. Angle also has a guest referee with….the returning Daivari of all people. We’re joined in progress after a break with Masters pulling Shawn down by the hair for some VERY fast two counts.

Angle comes in and gets double elbowed for not even two as Daivari takes some sweet time. Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets one more so Cena yells a lot while tagging in Shawn. Shawn starts in on Angle’s arm as the fans are back with that chanting again. Angle gets him into the corner though and it’s back to Masters for the bearhug. Leg cranking and a forearm to knock Cena off the apron have Angle in control but he walks into a DDT.

That’s enough for the hot tag to Cena and house is cleaned in a hurry. A cheap shot from the apron lets Angle get in a backbreaker for another very fast two. Cena suplexes his way to freedom and it’s back to Shawn for the house cleaning. The top rope elbow is loaded up but Daivari doesn’t mind Masters getting in a chair shot tot he ribs. Shawn takes the chair away though and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C. Fine enough for the idea of a match like this and you can see Survivor Series from here. Part of the problem is that Angle feels like a filler feud for Cena, but he’s coming up on his third pay per view title shot. Shawn vs. Masters could continue as tension on the Survivor Series team but other than that, this isn’t exactly inspiring stuff.

Shawn and Cena get chaired down (including a shot from Daivari) to end the show with Joey losing his freaking mind.

Overall Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as the focus was on almost everything but the Survivor Series match, leaving us focusing on either a lot of rematches or stuff that wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. I need something a little more than that to carry a show and while this wasn’t terrible, it also wasn’t all that good and I wasn’t interested in a lot of what they had going on.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

As long as this show is going to be, there’s something special about getting to see it every year. This year’s show is built around the three major matches and the question of how many happy endings we can have. You know it’s not going to be all three, but which of the three doesn’t go through. Those matches consist of Universal Champion Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins, Smackdown World Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Kofi Kingston and the winner take all match for both Women’s titles as Ronda Rousey faces Charlotte and Becky Lynch in a genuinely historic main event. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Nese is challenging after winning a tournament and wastes no time in trying a jumping knee. Murphy gets sent outside but is fine enough to drop Nese ribs first onto the turnbuckle as we go split screen for an ad. Well at least they didn’t do this during the TV build. Back to full with Nese fighting out of a chinlock and suplexing the champ into the corner. Murphy gets tied in the ropes for a Lionsault but catches Nese with a superkick. A spinning faceplant gets two and some knees to the face have Nese in more trouble.

Nese is fine enough to hit a reverse hurricanrana and they trade a series of strikes to the face. Nese’s kneeling over the back piledriver gets two, followed by the 450 for the same. Murphy is right back up with Murphy’s Law but Nese gets a foot on the rope. With nothing else working, Murphy tries Nese’s running knee in the corner but walks into a superkick. A German suplex into the corner sets up the real running knee to give Nese the pin and the title at 10:43.

Rating: C+. Pretty good stuff here, even if I can’t imagine Nese holding the title very long. He’s the New York guy so it makes sense to have him win the title for a feel good moment. It wasn’t the most surprising thing in the world but it’s a good idea to open the night with a mostly short but effective match. Not bad at all, though Nese is a short term champion at best.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Naomi, Lana, Nikki Cross, Asuka, Mickie James, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Ruby Riott, Sarah Logan, Liv Morgan, Zelina Vega, Dana Brooke, Eve Torres, Mandy Rose, Candice LeRae, Maria Kanellis, Sonya Deville, Carmella

It’s a wild brawl to start with Nikki Cross chasing Maria in a circle and getting rid of her. Asuka sends Nikki out and LeRae is out as well. Ember Eclipses Lana (as Captain Marvel) and knocks out Naomi, followed by another Eclipse to Mandy. Lana manages to get rid of Ember and insists that she’s #1 before kicking Sane in the face. Sane goes up and gets shoved to the apron, leaving us with a Lana vs. Logan staredown.

The Riott Squad gets together and dumps Lana but Sane is back in with the Insane Elbow on Logan. The Squad gets rid of Sane though and Logan lifts Morgan up for a flipping Stunner on Vega. Now it’s Asuka taking the triple teaming but she slides back in from the apron. Dana of all people fights back against the Squad and gets rid of Ruby. Logan is out as well but Vega blocks a cartwheel elbow.

Mandy and Sonya get rid of Vega and Brooke as we’re down to Logan, Rose, Deville, James and Asuka. James superkicks Mandy out but gets eliminated by Sonya to get us to three. Asuka sends Deville to the apron but Logan dumps both of them out….as Carmella slides back in, JUST LIKE LAST YEAR. Carmella knocks Logan over but Logan keeps her feet above the floor. A superkick gets rid of Logan to give Carmella the win at 10:30.

Rating: D. Hey, remember last year when someone snuck back in at the end and won the Women’s Battle Royal in a big surprise despite doing nothing coming into the match where someone could have gotten something out of it? No particular reason for asking of course. The match was your usual deal of everyone standing around until it was time for them to be eliminated until the ending. It was shorter than last year’s though and that’s an improvement. Oh and so much for Lacey Evans winning the thing as a surprise.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

The Revival is defending and this wasn’t announced on the Kickoff Show. Dawson takes Hawkins into the corner to start and gets two off a rollup. It’s off to Ryder vs. Wilder, the latter of whom gets the loudest cheer of his career after he decked the guy who jumped Bret last night. An armbar keeps Ryder down and Dawson comes back in to rip at Ryder’s face. Ryder gets in a suplex and tosses Wilder into the corner but Dawson knocks Hawkins off the apron.

We hit the chinlock on Ryder for a bit until he backdrops his way to freedom, allowing the hot tag to Hawkins. A backslide gets two on Dawson and Wilder gets knocked off the apron. The double clothesline gives us a double knockdown and it’s back to Ryder. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson and Ryder suplex suplexes Wilder to the floor for a scary crash. Hawkins throws Ryder back in for the tag but Wilder breaks up the cover.

Wilder DDTs Ryder on the floor and Hawkins takes a brainbuster to put all four down on the floor. Back in Dawson is rather cocky about beating Hawkins, who seems to be a bit dead. You never want to be too cocky in wrestling though and it’s a small package to pin Dawson for the titles at 13:21.

Rating: C. Ignoring Hawkins losing 269 matches in a row and not having a win since November 2016, Ryder not winning a non-Main Event match on TV since December 2016 and the team not winning a match together since 2008, this makes perfect sense. The love for the New York fans is strong tonight, which makes me wonder what kind of horrible things they have in mind for the main card. Just let the Revival go sit at home until their contracts are up though because I’d rather they go out with just this humiliation rather than seeing what else WWE could think of for them.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Colin Jost, Michael Che, Braun Strowman, Otis, Tucker, Kalisto, Gran Metalik, Lince Dorado, Ali, Titus O’Neil, Konnor, Viktor, Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy, Andrade, Jinder Mahal, Harper, Bo Dallas, Bobby Roode, Apollo Crews, Bo Dallas, Luke Gallows, Karl Anderson, No Way Jose, Tyler Breeze, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Rhyno, Shelton Benjamin, EC3

Hey Harper is back. The SNL guys bail to the floor as Breeze and EC3 are both out. Shelton and Dorado are eliminated as well with Strowman throwing everyone he comes near. Harper vs. Strowman gets a big reaction but everyone piles onto them to break it up. Titus misses a charge and gets eliminated, followed by Ali tornado DDTing Jose and tossing him. Strowman gets sent into the post and goes through the ropes to the floor as Anderson is tossed.

Rhyno is out as well and the Hardys get into a mini match with Roode/Gable, with Roode being eliminated. Metalik gets thrown out by Mahal and Andrade monkey flips Kalisto out. There goes Gable as the ring is clearing out in a hurry. Tucker runs the Ascension over and there’s a double Caterpillar to both of them. The Ascension is thrown out but Strowman tosses Heavy Machinery.

Mahal is out next as Harper tries to suplex Ali, only to have Strowman kick them both out at the same time. We’re down to Strowman, Che, Jost, Matt, Jeff, Apollo and Andrade. Apollo and Andrade go to the apron and Andrade snaps off a hurricanrana to eliminate both of them in a dumb move. The Hardys try to pull Strowman out but the SNL guys come in and fail to throw them out.

Strowman shrugs them off and dumps the Hardys, leaving him alone with Jost and Che. One of them grabs a mic and says this doesn’t have to end in violence, so here’s his therapist to talk Strowman through this. Strowman beats him up and gives him a chokeslam (good thing the therapist knows how to take a flat back bump) before slapping Che out. A running boot in the corner misses and Jost goes for the elimination but gets shoved away. Strowman throws him out for the win at 10:24.

Rating: D. Yeah it was stupid and the SNL guys were annoying, but it was on the Kickoff Show and the right person won so I can’t complain all that much. Strowman should have won something bigger than this but at least he comes away with something instead of just being tossed out like anyone else. You know, like they did with Asuka in the first match.

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful.

Helicopters fly over the stadium instead of the usual planes.

The opening video features wrestlers talking about this being the biggest stage and them being the players and storytellers. We see stills of famous Wrestlemania moments as the wrestlers talk about having the chance to live forever. They switch into a regular video of everyone involved with Lynch saying that they are the storytellers. This is a great idea, but not exactly practical when you consider that this is Wrestlemania GET EVERYONE ON THE CARD.

Here’s Wrestlemania host Alexa Bliss to say that Wrestlemania needs a goddess. She snaps her fingers…..and here’s Hulk Hogan. Well that works. Hogan: “It’s great to be back here in the Silverdome brother!” Ok that was funny. Hogan: “Ok it’s great to be back here in the MetLife Center!” He hits the catchphrase and poses with Bliss as Paul Heyman of all people storms out between the two of them. Heyman goes to the ring and says if they’re not closing the show, they’re not hanging around. They’re getting their business done and going to Las Vegas where Lesnar is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Lesnar is defending. Rollins has a new BEAST SLAYER graphic but Brock knees him off the apron and it’s an F5 on the floor before the bell rings. Lesnar throws him into various things at ringside and then over the announcers’ table a few times. They get inside but the referee won’t start the match because Rollins isn’t ready. Lesnar tosses him outside again for another whip over the announcers’ table and through the top piece of the table.

They go back inside and Rollins is mostly dead but gets to his feet for the opening bell. Three straight German suplexes let Lesnar bounce as Rollins’ back is all kinds of pretty colors. The F5 is escaped and the ref is bumped, allowing Rollins to hit the low row. Rollins hits the low superkick and the Stomp connects. A second and third Stomp give Rollins the title at 2:30.

Jerry Lawler joins commentary.

Randy Orton vs. AJ Styles

The CGI graphics are back with Orton’s being a HUGE snake that made me jump. Battle over respect between the two of them as Orton has asked why it took AJ so long to get here. An early RKO attempt is blocked so Orton goes with a thumb to the eye and the Orton Stomp. AJ gets back up with the dropkick and the slingshot forearm to the floor drops Orton again. Orton is thrown back in and knocks AJ into the barricade. The chinlock doesn’t last long as AJ fights up with the Phenomenal Blitz and a basement forearm.

The Styles Clash is blocked and Orton tries the hanging DDT, which is reversed into the Calf Crusher. Once the rope is grabbed AJ goes to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but drops back down as Orton jumps for the RKO and crashes, allowing AJ to hit the springboard 450 for two. Orton is back up with the top rope superplex as the fans are interested in something else.

The hanging DDT plants AJ and Orton plays to the crowd to get their attention back. The RKO is countered with an enziguri but the second attempt connects for two. It feels like it’s been awhile since anyone kicked out of that. With the regular version not working, Orton loads up a super RKO but gets kicked out to the floor. That means a Phenomenal Forearm to the outside and the regular one finishes Orton at 16:17.

Rating: B-. This was about what you would have expected with good action between two talented veterans. AJ knowing that the RKO counter was coming was fine and the ending was as decisive as you could get with AJ surviving the RKO and winning clean. It’s a perfectly good match and it’s not like the two of them have anything else to do at the moment. Expect a rematch next month.

Lacey Evans cameo, though this time she stops to sneer at the crowd.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar

The Usos are defending. Jey and Black start things off but Sheamus tags himself in and low bridges Jey to the floor. Black gets taken down and it’s Rusev coming in to hold Black up for a kick from Rusev. It’s off to Ricochet with the springboard clothesline for two on Nakamura before spinning around Cesaro multiple times for a headscissors.

That just earns him a shot to the face and it’s time to swing Ricochet while Sheamus beats on Rusev’s chest. Nakamura tries to make a save so Sheamus beats on him as well, followed by the same to Jey and Black, all while Ricochet is swinging Ricochet for well over a minute. The Sharpshooter goes on with Jey making the save, earning himself a trip to the floor with his brother.

We settle down (kind of) to Black bringing in Ricochet, who gets caught by Rusev in a swinging release Rock Bottom. Everyone goes to the corner for the required Tower of Doom, with Ricochet rolling through because he’s Ricochet and more awesome than you. Black knees Sheamus down and Ricochet hits the 630 for two with a bunch of people diving in for the save. We get a parade of kicks to the face with Sheamus taking the double superkick. The Double Us retains the Usos’ titles at 10:05.

Rating: C+. The big spots helped a lot here and it felt like an amped up Smackdown match, which is one of the best things that you can have in this situation. There’s no other way you can go with no story and the match being thrown together on Smackdown. Just have them do the spots and do the best they can, like Ricochet sticking the landing and that insane swing.

Recap of the Hall of Fame.

Honky Tonk Man (Long overdue)

Harlem Heat (More than deserved)

Torrie Wilson (The bar has been lowered)

Brutus Beefcake (Sure why not)

Hart Foundation (Yep, and may I add yep)

Sue Aitchison, with John Cena’s 600^th Make-A-Wish (Nothing wrong with that)

D-Generation X (Fine, though they feel weak for headliners)

We recap Shane McMahon vs. The Miz in the feud that WWE cares about and thinks we do too. Miz’s dad is a horrible person and only cared about his son when Miz started teaming with Shane, who didn’t like having to fix Miz’s daddy issues. Tonight it’s Falls Count Anywhere to blow it off.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere. Shane makes Greg Hamilton do his entrance three times, with the third being held out extra long. Miz’s dad is in the front row so Shane goes straight to the floor to choke him. The chase is on but Shane gets in a monitor shot to the head. The big elbow through the announcers’ table is loaded up so Miz’s dad gets in the way. Still doesn’t help the fact that he’s a horrible father.

Dad gets in the ring and puts up his fists so Shane jumps him. The beating brings Miz back into the ring to take Shane apart and send him into the barricade before checking on his dad. With the medics taking care of Papa Miz, Miz tackles Shane over the barricade and they head into the crowd, eventually going to the tech arena near one of the towers that holds up the structure above the ring. They go into an open area of the crowd with Miz hitting Shane in the foot with a chair.

Another shot to the back lets Miz knock Shane over to the international commentators station where tables are overturned. A chokeslam puts Shane through the table for two and a monitor shot knocks Shane over a barricade and down into the shadows (cool visual). Miz follows and gets a delayed two as replays show Shane landing on top of a golf cart.

They fight up a camera tower ala HHH vs. Undertaker at Wrestlemania XVII with Miz hitting a Skull Crushing Finale onto a metal platform for two. Shane gets in a shot to the face and climbs to the top of the tower as this isn’t going to go well. Miz follows him up and gets rather stalkerish as he stares Shane down to one knee. Shane begs off so Miz hammers away and suplexes him off the tower onto a crashpad….with Shane landing on top for the pin at 15:38.

Rating: C-. Why not. Why not. WHY THE #$**#%%!!@# NOT! Why shouldn’t we spend five months building this up and giving Shane McMahon a title before having him win at Wrestlemania? I’m sure this will continue, because going from November until April isn’t long enough for a Shane McMahon story. That’s just great.

The match itself was your usual walking around the stadium fight with Miz dominating through most of it until the end. The deal with Miz’s dad was a cool moment but they should have brought him out later on in the match instead of so close to the beginning. Not bad overall, but the ending was stupid.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Bayley and Sasha Banks are defending. The IIconics are a devil (Billie) and a black winged angel (Peyton). Natalya and Beth are in matching pink and black so here’s Bret Hart to stand with them on the stage and then go to the back. It’s a brawl to start with Nia being sent into the steps. We settle down to Peyton getting beaten up but Billie helps her out, allowing them to hit their superhero pose.

Beth gets bulldogged onto Billie’s knee with the kickout making Peyton scream. Natalya comes in for a Hart Attack for two on Billie with Bayley making the save. It’s off to Sasha, who is taken down without too much effort. Natalya and Beth lift Sasha into the air so Bayley makes the save and throws Bayley at Beth for the Bank Statement but Beth powers out as you probably expected.

Natalya puts Bayley and Sasha in the Sharpshooter at the same time until Tamina breaks it up with a superkick. Nia gets back in and starts crushing people, setting up Nia and Tamina going up top at the same time. Beth saves Banks from death by shoving Nia off and Sasha drops the frog splash for two on Natalya. Beth is back up and takes Bayley to the top for a super Glam Slam….but Billie comes in and steals the pin and the title at 10:46.

Rating: D. Some of the spots were good but at the same time, there were too many people running around and it hurt things a lot. I do like the IIconics coming in and stealing the belts as it certainly fits their style better (Do they even have a regular finisher?). But yeah, just too much going on when it didn’t need to be the case. Drop Beth and Natalya and it would have fit better, but I guess the Beth Phoenix fan club needed one more moment?

The helicopter pilots from earlier are here.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan. Kingston has basically done everything there is to do in the company outside of winning the World Title. He got close in the Elimination Chamber but couldn’t quite pull it off. Vince McMahon then decided to throw one challenge after another at him with Kofi coming up just short every time until Big E. and Xavier Woods won a tag team gauntlet match to get him the title shot. If Kofi doesn’t win here, I don’t know if he ever will.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging with New Day in his corner while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a present for Kofi, but only after he wins. They go to the mat to start with Kofi sticking the landing off a monkey flip to send Bryan outside. That means the big dive over the top as the roster is watching in the locker room again, where there is a total of one single monitor showing the match. Back in and Kofi tries to jump a little too much, allowing Bryan to pull him down into a surfboard.

Some forearms to the back of the head seem to wake Kofi up and it’s a clothesline into the Boom Drop. Bryan bails outside and Kofi dives after, only to crash onto the announcers’ table ribs first. Back in and we hit the waistlock for a good while as Bryan stays on the ribs. He switches over to the Boston crab, eventually stepping to the side to make it half Liontamer. With that broken, Bryan loads up a belly to back superplex but gets elbowed down three times in a row.

Kofi drops a top rope splash to the back for two but the ribs are banged up again in the process. Trouble in Paradise misses and they go to some rollups for near falls until Kofi kicks him in the head. Bryan stops him with a stomp out of the corner and busts out the YES pose for a nice callback. The running knee is countered into a rollup and SOS gets two but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock in the middle of the ring.

The long crawl gets Kofi’s leg on the rope and Bryan is starting to get mad. The kicks to the ribs have Kofi in trouble but he fires back kicks of his own, capped off by a reverse suplex (ok then) for a close two. Rowan goes after New Day but Kofi hits him with Trouble in Paradise, followed by the Midnight Hour on the floor. Bryan’s suicide dive is countered by a right hand but Trouble in Paradise misses, allowing Bryan to hit the running knee for two, causing the fans to build a roof on the stadium and then blow it off.

Bryan has had it and starts stomping the head as Woods and Big E. watch on. The LeBell Lock goes on and the referee checks the arm….which stays up. Bryan hits him in the face and pulls again but Kofi rolls out and hammers away at Bryan, who won’t let go of Kofi’s hand. That lets Kofi stomp away for a change and Bryan is done, setting up Trouble in Paradise to give Kofi the pin and the title at 23:41.

Rating: A-. I mean….they could have gone out there and demonstrated how to make a pimento loaf and it wouldn’t have mattered as long as they had that ending. That was a genuine Wrestlemania moment and you could feel what it meant to everyone. This was incredible and one of the best moments they could have had. Eleven years ago, Kofi had the worst debut match I’ve ever seen and now he’s WWE Champion at Wrestlemania. Not too shabby.

Post match Woods pulls off the cover and unveils the non-wooden title so Kofi can pose with the right design, already complete with custom side plates. Kofi’s kids come in to celebrate and now it’s time to open the present. It’s a new New Day shirt with Kofi holding the title.

We recap the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.

Bliss, now in a different outfit, goes in to see Jost and Che as they’re checked for injuries. She says don’t worry because they’re in good hands….because Scott Hall and Kevin Nash are the doctors? And giving them prostate exams? Am I missing a joke here?

Booker T. joins commentary.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and I believe he’s dressed as Mysterio from Spider-Man. Joe goes straight at him and Rey hits a 619 in less than a minute. Rey’s wheelbarrow bulldog is countered into the Koquina Clutch….and Rey is out at 1:00. So I’m thinking he’s still a bit injured? Booker: “I DID ALL MY PREP WORK FOR THAT???”

Trailer for Batista’s new movie.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns is back from leukemia and needed a first singles match. Drew took out both Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins and is promising to do the same to Reigns tonight.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre is played to the ring by the New York Police Department Bagpipe Band. Reigns lowers his head to start and gets kicked in the face but what looked to be a powerslam is escaped. That means a legdrop to the back of the head over the middle rope but Drew is right back with the Glasgow Kiss. The chinlock has Reigns in more trouble until Drew takes him outside for a suplex, thereby upping the total amount of trouble.

The reverse Alabama Slam gives Drew two and he tells Reigns he should have said no. A flipping slam off the top has Reigns down again as Drew tells him that he broke the Shield. The Future Shock (Drew: “THIS ONE IS FOR AMBROSE!”) is broken up so Drew slaps him in the face. A big boot sends Drew outside and it’s a Samoan drop on the floor. Back in and the jumping clothesline puts Drew down, followed by the Superman Punch to do it again. The spear finishes Drew at 10:10.

Rating: C-. Totally standard Raw main event with Drew trying but not having a prayer of winning. There’s only so much you can do when everything is against you like this and Drew tried as hard as he can. Just getting this spot is Drew’s big win of the night and that’s not the worst place to be. He’ll be back and do just fine because he’s that good.

Here’s Elias to play some drums rather well. Now he’s at a piano (teleporting from one to the other) and does quite splendidly there too. Now he’s in the middle of the ring with his guitar. Elias the drummer and Elias the piano player play him in and he continues to have chops. Piano and Drum take a bow and now guitar Elias is on his own. The fans sing a little OH WALK WITH ELIAS and Elias promises more versions of himself, including a harpsichord player. As he starts his song, a SPECIAL BULLETIN appears on screen showing….the 1932 World Series?

Babe Ruth calls his shot (yes he did) and hits a home run….and here’s John Cena to Basic Thuganomics. Well you know the Yankees gear is making his skin crawl. Cena says Elias got the worst deal because John Cena is about to turn heel. He feels like he’s watching one of his movies because this whole thing sucks.

Cena isn’t feeling it because this is a wasted wrestling experiment. Cena: “They call me the golden shovel so I’m about to bury your push.” He throws him some nuts and says there’s no AA today, but here’s an FU. Cena lays him out with the knuckles and plants him with the FU. This worked well as Cena is often at his best when he’s making fun of himself.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Batista wanted one more match with HHH to end their careers on his terms so he beat up Ric Flair to get HHH’s attention. The match is on and it’s No Holds Barred.

Shawn Michaels is on commentary.

Batista vs. HHH

No Holds Barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista slips through the ropes on the way into the ring before heading outside to glare at Shawn. He even walks around the ring and does his entrance again, this time without the slipping. HHH’s entrance video seems to be inspired by Mad Max and shows a road race. The stage opens up and the car drives out with HHH on the back. I’ve seen worse.

Batista drives him into the corner to start but gets elbowed out to the floor. They fight to the floor with HHH going over the announcers’ table but managing to pull out a tool box to hit Batista in the head. Now it’s a chain to whip Batista in the back and choke a bit before going for some pliers. Batista’s finger gets bent back and HHH stomps on the pliers to make it even worse. Now it’s time for some needle nose pliers, but first he sits in a chair on Batista’s throat. HHH: “THAT’S A NICE NOSE RING!” And then he rips it out with the pliers!

Graves: “Batista won’t be able to be a guardian of the house like this! This guy is my boss!” Batista heads to the floor (Shawn: “His nose is bleeding!” Graves: “YOU THINK???”) and drops HHH onto the announcers’ table three times in a row without breaking the thing. Some chairs to the back keep HHH in trouble and they head back inside with Batista busting out a White Noise of all things.

Back to the floor with Batista putting the steps onto an announcers’ table and clearing off a second one, complete with a point to Shawn. The Batista Bomb off the steps is countered with a backdrop and the table STILL doesn’t break. Good grief where have those tables been all these years? HHH gets up, throws a crotch chop, and spears Batista through the German table. They slowly get back inside and HHH (eventually) finds a sledgehammer.

That just earns him a spear for two but a charge with the hammer is cut off by HHH’s raised boot. The spinebuster connects and it’s time for the Batista Bomb, with HHH dropping the hammer on his way down. That gets two and Batista brings the steps inside. He takes too long punching in the corner (right in front of the steps because wrestlers never learn) and gets powerbombed down onto the steps.

The Pedigree….only gets two as this keeps going. Batista gets in a DDT onto the steps and things stop again but here’s Ric Flair (I was waiting on him) to hand HHH a sledgehammer. HE COULDN’T DO THIS TEN MINUTES AGO??? HHH uses the steps to launch into a sledgehammer shot to the head but Batista pops back up so he can eat the Pedigree for the pin at 24:49. You know, because a JUMPING HAMMER TO THE HEAD isn’t enough to pin someone.

Rating: D+. The first ten minutes of this was very good but, as tends to be the case for almost any HHH match anymore, it went on too long because there was way too much laying around between moves. The ending looked ridiculous as well but that’s another situation. What they did early on was entertaining and brutal (that pliers thing was nuts) but I was looking at the clock near the end, which happens way too often.

Alexa Bliss (outfit #3) has the B Team model AND STILL CHAMPION Daniel Bryan shirts. Ron Simmons comes in for the cameo.

JBL joins commentary.

Kurt Angle vs. Baron Corbin

Rating: F. The idea of Kurt Angle losing to Baron Corbin in his last match is a failure. Not because it’s Angle last match. Not because the match wasn’t good. Not because WHY? But because we now have to deal with more Baron Corbin on Raw as more fans’ heads explode as we try to figure out what WWE sees in him. I’m sure this was Angle’s decision and while I can respect that, someone named McMahon should have overridden him.

Post match Angle wants his music played one last time so we can get in one more YOU SUCK. That’s exactly what he gets, as he should.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with special contacts in, is defending and Balor is the Demon, making its Wrestlemania debut. Balor hits a spinwheel kick and ax kick to the back, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. There’s the big flip dive but Lashley catches him with a spinebuster back inside. Lashley hits a heck of a spear through the ropes to drive Balor to the floor, followed by a regular one for two back inside. Balor gets back up and powerbombs Lashley (good one too) and the Coup de Grace gives Balor the title back at 4:04.

Rating: C. The spots were good (that spear was awesome) and the powerbomb looked awesome, but the problem is they didn’t need to do the Demon here. I get why they did it and it makes sense to do it at Wrestlemania, but at the same time what’s the point in having him do it if he can already beat Lashley and Lio Rush? It’s a good enough match, but this story was them trading the title and then the Demon doing what regular Balor could do.

Alexa (#4) announces the new WWE attendance record of 82,265. She thinks we need a break though so here are R-Truth and Carmella for the world’s largest dance break.

Wrestlemania XXXVI is in Tampa Bay on April 5, 2020.

We recap the women’s triple threat match. Becky Lynch has become the people’s champion, Charlotte is the Smackdown Women’s Champion and the corporate pick and Ronda Rousey is the Raw Women Champion and the unstoppable force. Tonight is winner take all for both belts, but it’s much more about the history because the match is actually headlining the show.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Ronda is Raw Women’s Champion and Charlotte is Smackdown Women’s Champion….and she comes in via helicopter and lands in the parking lot, where a red carpet is rolled out for her in a Horseman homage. Since she has to walk a good ways into the stadium, here are Joan Jett and the Blackhearts to play Ronda to the ring. The bell rings at 12:01am and Becky goes straight for the Disarm-Her on Ronda but gets shoved away so they can all head outside.

That means a Piper’s Pit for both of them and Ronda starts the trash talk. Charlotte gets up and sends Rousey into the barricade, setting up a showdown with Charlotte inside. The Disarm-Her to Becky is broken up and it’s Ronda coming back in to kick Becky in the face. A double powerbomb over the top is countered into a double armbar on Becky and Charlotte. Becky escapes and dropkicks Ronda to the floor for a NASTY crash on her back. Charlotte Downward Spirals Becky into the buckle for two as we look at Rousey landing square on her back again.

Becky is right back with the Disarm-Her but Ronda comes back to life and makes the save. A running knee breaks up the armbar on Becky and Charlotte hits a double Natural Selection for two each. Becky gets sent outside so Charlotte chops Ronda, who tells her to bring it. That’s just what Charlotte does with a backhand to the face so Ronda hits a jumping knee, which is countered into a Liontamer. Becky breaks it up with a bulldog and hits a double DDT for two each.

A super Bexploder gets two on Charlotte, setting up a double high crossbody from Rousey. The double armbar is countered with a double powerbomb Ronda is done for the moment. Becky calls Charlotte to her and avoids a charge, letting Becky kick her to the floor. The Disarm-Her goes on and Rousey uses the ropes to stand up for the break. A missed charge lets Becky get the Disarm-Her in the corner until Charlotte’s big boot breaks it up.

Charlotte starts in on Rousey’s knee and gets the Figure Four but Becky comes off the top with a legdrop for the save. And now, a table because that’s what this match was calling for. Rousey breaks up a powerbomb through the table and turns the table over, saying tables are for b****** (at least the third time she’s used that word so far). Charlotte comes back in for a double spear as Cole’s voice is almost gone.

The table is set up in the corner and Charlotte gets two off a spear to Becky. Rousey gets back up and helps Becky drive Charlotte somewhat through the table to knock her outside. The fight is on and Rousey goes with a Shining Wizard and tries Piper’s Pit….but gets reversed into a crucifix to give Becky the pin and the titles at 22:27!

Rating: B. The ending was straight out of Angle vs. Benoit at Wrestlemania XVII with the submission attempts all match until the quick pinfall. What matters here is Becky defeated Rousey to win the titles as she should have. That was how this show needed to end and it did, even if the ending could have been a bit smoother. Charlotte will be fine and I’m curious to see who goes after Becky as the first victim.

Replays show Rousey’s shoulders were WAY up so there’s your story going forward (if Rousey sticks around). Cole: “Tonight will forever be known as WrestleMANia!” Oh just stop dude. Pyro and posing takes us out.

Overall Rating: B-. Let’s get the things I got wrong out of the way first. First: this was WAY better than I was expecting after last year’s near nightmare of a show. Second: they actually did give us three happy endings, which I said several times would not happen. I’m very glad to be wrong on that, but I certainly was wrong. Third: yeah HHH vs. Batista went on too long and it brought things down. I had high hopes and they didn’t come through.

Now for the good stuff: the right people won (mostly) and the big matches all went to the right people. For the first time in way too long, we had something to cheer about. If that’s it for Lesnar at the moment, thank goodness because he needs to go away for a long time and leave the title here. Rollins will be fine as champion for the summer before someone wins Money in the Bank and takes it from him (It’s going to be Corbin isn’t it?). Becky winning was the right way to go also, even if the ending was a little rushed. There’s one big one left though.

Kofi Kingston is WWE Champion. That was one of the best moments I’ve seen WWE put on in years and might pass Bryan in New Orleans. It felt special and you don’t get that often enough, mainly because there was serious doubt if they could actually pull the trigger. I loved that moment and was happier than I’ve been at something in a long time. I’d have loved to see it close the show, but I get why they couldn’t go there. Incredible moment though.

Overall, the pacing was FAR better than what they’ve had in recent years and while there was a lot of stuff they needed to trim down (despite having multiple matches go less than five minutes), it didn’t drag nearly as bad as it has before. It still needs to be shorter by about an hour (at least) and not everyone needs to be on the show, but for what we got, it was one of the better shows in recent memory and we got a genuine Wrestlemania moment. Well done, and it was close to being great.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Brock Lesnar – Stomp

AJ Styles b. Randy Orton – Phenomenal Forearm

Usos b. The Bar, Aleister Black/Ricochet and Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev – Double Us to Sheamus

Shane McMahon b. The Miz – McMahon pinned Shane after a superplex off a camera tower

IIconics b. Boss N Hug Connection, Nia Jax/Tamina and Beth Phoenix/Natalya – Super Glam Slam to Bayley

Kofi Kingston b. Daniel Bryan – Trouble in Paradise

Samoa Joe b. Rey Mysterio – Koquina Clutch

Roman Reigns b. Drew McIntyre – Spear

HHH b. Batista – Pedigree

Baron Corbin b. Kurt Angle – End of Days

Finn Balor b. Bobby Lashley – Coup de Grace

Becky Lynch b. Ronda Rousey and Charlotte – Crucifix to Rousey

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Taboo Tuesday 2005
Date: November 1, 2005
Location: iPayOne Center, San Diego, California
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler

It’s the second edition of this concept and this time around the card is looking a little better. This show features a double main event of John Cena defending against Kurt Angle and another challenger to be determined (it’s going to be Shawn Michaels), but the bigger match is HHH vs. Ric Flair in a violent grudge match. Flair has begged to be put in a cage and I think you know where this is going. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about power with HHH vs. Ric Flair getting more attention than anything else, as it should.

Joey Styles is proud to make his regular pay per view debut.

The big keyboard stage is a cool visual. Do more stuff like that please.

The first vote is to decide which two Smackdown wrestlers will face Edge and Christ Masters:

Matt Hardy – 31%

Rey Mysterio – 29%

John Bradshaw Layfield – 17%

Christian – 13%

Hardcore Holly – 10%

Other than a match that had been taped in advance, that would be Christian’s last WWE appearance until 2009.

Edge/Chris Masters vs. Matt Hardy/Rey Mysterio

Actually hold on as Lita says Edge isn’t wrestling tonight because he has nothing to gain from this. Here’s the replacement.

Snitsky/Chris Masters vs. Matt Hardy/Rey Mysterio

What a horrifying team. Masters jumps Mysterio from behind to start and Snitsky decks Matt on the floor. We start with Rey in trouble and a pair of referees (one from each show) in the ring. Snitsky’s slam gets two (each that is) so Masters hits a series of backbreakers, including one to bend Rey over his knee. The sitout bulldog is countered with a hard slam down but the chinlock doesn’t last long.

Rey gets the tag off to Matt so the place can pick up, including a Side Effect for two on Snitsky. A superplex (nearly a brainbuster) gives Matt the same with Masters having to make the save. The monsters send Matt hard into the corner though and Masters cranks on the arms to keep him down. Masters gets two off a heck of a clothesline with Rey needing to make a save.

We hit another chinlock before Snitsky goes with something more worthwhile in a hard spinebuster. It’s back to Masters for a front facelock but a missed charge gives Matt a breather. That’s broken up as well though and Snitsky goes with more sending him into the corner. Matt slips over the shoulder and gets in a reverse DDT though and now the hot tag brings in Rey.

Everything breaks down and Rey’s tornado DDT is countered into the Masterlock. Rey kicks off the ropes to flip onto Masters for two, with the Raw referee breaking up the count. Matt and Rey hit stereo dives to the floor, setting up a springboard sunset flip for two on Masters. Back up and Masters grabs a torture rack neckbreaker for the same on Rey with Matt making the save. That’s enough for Masters though and it’s a 619 into the Twist of Fate into the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: B. The Smackdown team had potential but who would have thought that Masters and Snitsky had that in them? This was a heck of a match with a very hot finish and a much better showcase than I was expecting from these four. You can guarantee that this story isn’t over though and Survivor Series seems to be looming in a nice way.

Mick Foley and Maria’s luggage has gotten switched as Mick has lingerie and Maria has his Mankind mask. Maria: “Interesting smell!” Maria strips off screen and Mick has a nice day (their words).

Eugene needs a partner:

Jimmy Snuka – 43%

Jim Duggan – 40%

Kamala – 17%

Rob Conway/Tyson Tomko vs. Eugene/Jimmy Snuka

Eugene and Tomko start things off with the big bald gladly accepting a test of strength. That earns him alternating thrust chops to the throat but Tomko breaks up the tag to Snuka. Conway is so annoyed that he takes off his sunglasses before elbowing Eugene in the face. The chinlock goes on and a right hand breaks up the comeback attempt. Eugene finally gets in a clothesline on Conway and the diving tag brings in Snuka. The chops are on and everything breaks down. Tomko gets knocked outside and Snuka and Eugene headbutt Conway into a Rock Bottom. The Superfly Splash finishes Conway off.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? This was Snuka having little more than a cameo at the end of the match with Eugene working on his own. It’s fine for a short feel good match though and I can’t really get annoyed at that. It wasn’t good, but it did what it was supposed to do.

Post match Tomko goes after Snuka but Kamala and Duggan run in for the save.

Here’s who Carlito will be facing:

Mankind – 52%

Cactus Jack – 35%

Dude Love – 13%

We recap Carlito vs. Mick Foley. Believe it or not, it’s about being cool and apple spitting.

Mankind vs. Carlito

Carlito slugs away to start and hits a dropkick, only to get elbowed in the face. The Tree of Woe elbow connects and they head outside with Mankind grabbing a chair. A drop toehold sends Mankind into the chair into the steps so they head inside with Carlito snapping off a Russian legsweep.

Carlito grabs the rare standing chinlock but Mankind is out fast enough, setting up a double clothesline to put both of them down. It’s Mankind up first to hammer Carlito down in the corner and there’s the running knee to make it worse. The Bang Bang elbow to the floor connects for two back inside and Carlito is reeling. The double arm DDT into the Mandible Claw (Mr. Socko is sporting an afro) to give Mankind the win.

Rating: D. The weirdest part of this: seeing a Mick Foley match that had no stipulations and ended clean. This should tell you a lot about where Carlito is at the moment as he lost the match in pretty short order and to someone who has not been a full time wrestler in several years. It wasn’t the worst but it was little more than a workout for Foley, who didn’t need a win like this.

Vince McMahon comes in to see Eric Bischoff and is annoyed that he missed the Raw vs. Smackdown match. Eric admits that Raw lost and Vince yells at him for messing up. Vince is tired of people like Eric being around here and waiting for Vince to save them. From now on, Bischoff is on his own.

Now we get two matches at once. Here’s who is in the Raw World Title match along with John Cena and Kurt Angle:

Shawn Michaels – 46%

Kane – 38%

Big Show – 16%

Those results also give us this.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Kane/Big Show vs. Trevor Murdoch/Lance Cade

Cade and Murdoch are defending and get knocked around before the bell. Kane beats on Murdoch to start and some running clotheslines make it worse. Murdoch actually gets in his own clothesline and brings Cade in, so Kane drags him over to Show instead. Well so much for that plan. Show comes in for the chop but it’s off to Murdoch, who completely fails with the kicks to Show’s ribs.

Rating: D+. Cade and Murdoch were almost squashed here but what are you expecting against Big Show and Kane? They’re the kind of team who are going to dominate things for a good while and really, who else were Cade and Murdoch supposed to face? The fact that we were less than a month into their reign and they were already at that point isn’t a good sign, but there hasn’t been much good for the Tag Team Titles in a long time.

Post break Murdoch tries to interrupt an interview and gets double chokeslammed as well.

Coach gives Vader and Goldust a pep talk because this could lead to him winning the WWE Championship.

The Divas come out in robes so we can find out what they will be wearing:

Lingerie: 43%

Leather and Lace: 32%

Cheerleaders: 25%

We recap Coach/Goldust/Vader vs. Batista. This was going to be Steve Austin vs. Coach but since Austin isn’t a complete numskull, he walked out before he had to put Coach over. This was going to be about Jim Ross’ job but since Austin isn’t a factor, that has been dropped.

First though, what kind of match are they having:

Street fight: 91%

Verbal debate: 6%

Arm wrestling: 3%

Jonathan Coachman vs. Batista

Non-title and Vader and Goldust are officially in Coach’s corner but they start the match in the ring because they actually understand the rules. Coach hides on the floor while the other two beat Batista down in the corner. That earns Goldust a spear so Coach comes in for some reason, earning himself a knockdown.

Coach’s kendo stick doesn’t work but Vader and Goldust take Batista down for a whipping with a belt. This time though Batista powers up and beats all three of them with the belt (Joey: “Batista is doing to Coach what Coach does to commentary every Monday night!”). With Goldust and Vader down, the Batista Bomb ends Coach in a hurry.

Rating: D. Batista has been presented as smart since his singles push began and he was intelligent again here, earning a pay per view payday for a pretty nothing match. That being said, there was no reason to have it be anything else, with Vader and Goldust being higher level lackeys but still lackeys nonetheless.

Shawn Michaels is ready to win the title but here’s Kurt Angle to say they should team up on John Cena and then find out who the best man is. Shawn will think about it, mainly because it’s not a bad plan.

Women’s Title: Battle Royal

Trish Stratus, Ashley, Candice Michelle, Mickie James, Victoria, Maria

Trish is defending and everyone is in lingerie (Victoria may or may not be, as her gear is close enough). An early Stratusphere attempt almost has Trish eliminated so Mickie makes a save. Maria runs Candice over and poses, but Mickie and Trish toss her out without much trouble. Candice triangle chokes Ashley over the ropes and gets eliminated as well, followed by Trish getting planted by Victoria’s spinning side slam.

Victoria fights off elimination again and catapults Ashley out with ease. Trish and Victoria fight to the apron so Mickie makes another save. The Matrish is broken up with a knee to the ribs but Mickie spears Victoria through the ropes for the sacrificial elimination to retain Trish’s title.

Rating: D. This is a great example of “it was what it was”. There was no point to this one other than the eye candy and that’s all well and good. Trish and Mickie are at least having some kind of a story and that’s more than what you would usually get int his division. You can only run Trish vs. Victoria so many times and we are long past that point. Not a good match from a quality standpoint, but I have no idea why you would expect one.

Post match Mickie cuts off Trish’s interview to talk about how awesome Trish is. Trish seems annoyed as she leaves.

We recap HHH vs. Ric Flair for the Intercontinental Title in what might as well be the real main event. HHH came back from a hiatus and destroyed Flair, because he thought Flair was settling for mediocrity when Flair was happy being Intercontinental Champion. The attack sent Flair over the edge and he was his old self again, swearing revenge against HHH. Flair has begged for a cage match and I think you know where this is going.

So where is this going?

Steel cage: 83%

Submission match: 13%

One fall to a finish: 4%

Intercontinental Title: Ric Flair vs. HHH

Flair is defending in a cage. They stare each other down to start until the first chop in the corner annoys HHH. Flair fights out of the other corner and isn’t taking anything from HHH early on. A spinebuster works much better for HHH and he sends Flair into the cage to bust him open (that took longer than I thought). HHH’s look at Flair of “I have to do this” is great and he makes it better by raking his face over the cage.

The knee pad is lowered and, after a WOO, the bare knee hits Flair’s head. HHH goes up top to escape but Flair makes the stop and chops away in the corner. That means a double crotching and they’re both down again. HHH goes up top again and finds a chain, only to dive into a raised boot. Flair tries a quick Figure Four but gets punched with the chain for two. Flair is COVERED in blood so HHH hammers away in the corner, setting up the Flair Flop.

The Figure Four makes Flair scream but he flips HHH off and turns it over. Another Figure Four attempt is kicked into the cage and HHH is busted this time. That wakes Flair up and he unloads on HHH, including a big bite of the forehead. Lawler: “It’s getting a little bit easier to watch!” The head is raked across the cage and a knee drop to the head connects as Flair is doing everything HHH did to him. It’s time to go after the leg as only Flair can, including the Figure Four.

HHH finally sends the referee into Flair for the break so Flair goes up….and hits the shot to the head for two. That always feels special, as does Flair’s signature HARD low blow. Flair goes to the door with HHH making the save, though Flair does bring a chair back in with him. A testicular claw lets Flair hammer away and he backdrops HHH onto the chair, followed by a shot to HHH’s head. Some more chair shots to the head have fans gasping and Flair escapes through the door to retain in an upset.

Rating: A-. I’ve seen this match a few times before and it keeps getting better. This was an amazing story of HHH beating Flair down and giving him everything he had but drawing out the legendary Flair for one more night. It was a situation of “I taught you everything you know, but I didn’t teach you everything I know” and the violence made it even better. Outstanding stuff here and I loved every bit of it despite not being a huge Flair fan.

We have a new record for Taboo Tuesday voting, smashing that whole one other time they’ve done this. Years later, WWE would probably include talking heads bragging about it in a documentary.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels

Cena is defending and Angle knocks Shawn outside so he can go after the champ. That earns Angle a suplex for one as Shawn is right back in for a save. Shawn stomps Cena down and covers Angle for two as Cena makes a save of his own. Everyone hits everyone else until Cena backdrops Angle over the top. Shawn’s clothesline puts Cena in the corner but Angle is back in for the German suplexes.

No one can hit a finisher so Shawn and Angle get together and pound Cena down. Cena gets sent shoulder first into the post and out to the floor but instead of fighting each other, the other two follow him out. There goes the Spanish announcers’ table and now it’s time for Shawn vs. Angle. Shawn gets hammered in the corner and a suplex gives Angle two. The bodyscissors keeps Shawn in trouble and Angle throws on a chinlock for a bonus.

Shawn turns around to escape so Angle runs him over without much trouble. Angle gets knocked off the top but runs the corner for the super Angle Slam and two more. It’s Cena back in for the high impact clotheslines to both with the second putting Angle on the floor. The Shuffle is broken up as Angle pulls Cena outside so Shawn hits a big flip dive onto Angle for a huge crash.

Everyone gets back in and Shawn forearms Cena down but Angle suplexes him to the floor again. Cena is back up with the Shuffle to Angle but the FU is countered into the ankle lock. The grapevine even goes on until Shawn takes way too much time to make the save via the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music hits Angle but Shawn walks into the FU to retain Cena’s title.

Rating: B. This was much more about Shawn vs. Angle but Cena did well enough to make things work well on his end. At the end of the day, Cena is very good but he’s not at this level yet and it’s ok to have the other two do most of the heavier lifting. It’s a heck of a match though and Cena getting another big win will only enhance his star power, which is what matters the most right now.

Cena can’t stand on the ankle to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The opener and two main events carry this thing and make up for the horrible middle section, which was little more than a disaster. In other words, if this was an In Your House, it could have been a near classic. What we got was good enough as the middle section is full of short matches, but the cage match is great and the main event worked well. The gimmick still doesn’t work very well and the Tuesday thing adds nothing, but the good matches made this work rather well.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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