IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: June 2, 2005
Location: Rexall Place, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re in that weird period where the fallout from a pay per view is over and now we’re on the way to nothing because there isn’t another Smackdown pay per view for over a month. At the same time though, we’re less than a week away from the Draft so it’s time to get some new toys around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We look back at Kurt Angle winning a battle royal and granting himself a match against Sharmell tonight. Eddie Guerrero attacked Rey Mysterio before the match because Eddie is insane.

Opening sequence.

We open with Carlito’s Cabana (again) with Matt Morgan acting as security. Carlito isn’t happy about being in Canada because Edmonton is the least coolest (his words) city in North America. We look at Morgan putting Big Show through a table last week with an F5. Morgan stutters at the crowd before Carlito brings out his guest for the week: John Cena. With the Wayne Gretzky jersey on, Cena mocks both Carlito and Morgan, the latter of whom does not like being called a palm tree.

Cena mocks the stuttering a lot before saying that since this might be their last night together on Smackdown, he needs to get to the point: Carlito isn’t cool. He’s a cabana boy with bad hair and hangs out with Michael Cole wannabes. We hear a bunch of similarities between Cole and Morgan (Hair, bear, affinity for oiling themselves up and wearing spandex) until Carlito says he can’t wait for someone to come over from Raw and embarrass Cena. That sounds cool with Cena, who says anyone who wants some can come get some. As for coming and getting some, tonight it’s Carlito/Morgan vs. Cena/Big Show.

Theodore Long is on the phone (which looked like the same Motorola I had around this time) when Booker T. and Sharmell come in. Booker wants Sharmell out of the match because she’s no wrestler, but Long says it’s all in the rules. However, Long does have an idea: Booker can be added to the match to make it a handicap match. That’s cool with Booker, so Long tells him to go handle his business.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Charlie Haas/Hardcore Holly

MNM is defending in a fifteen minute Iron Man match, because this needed a trilogy match with a gimmick. Haas trips Nitro to the mat to start so Nitro bails to the floor for a breather. Back in and a crossbody gets two on Nitro, who is chased into the corner for the tag off to Mercury. Holly pulls him in and hits a Russian legsweep for two, followed by the hanging kick to the ribs.

The Alabama Slam is loaded up but the referee is off yelling at Haas, allowing Nitro to hit a superkick for the pin and the first fall. Holly stays in and grabs an armbar on Nitro, which doesn’t exactly last long. Therefore Holly puts it right back on as the stalling continues and we take another break. Back again with less than six and a half minutes to go after MNM got a second fall during the break when Haas was posted and pinned.

Haas grabs a quick Oklahoma roll to get a fall back so the champs start slowing the pace down again. The fans want Holly with five minutes left as the announcers make basketball analogies about the clock. Holly finally comes in for a save and tries to drag Haas to the corner in a move that isn’t done enough. A running hip shot knocks Haas to the floor so Holly throws him back inside.

Back in and Haas finally gets in a clothesline for a breather and an enziguri allows the hot tag with less than two minutes to go. Holly cleans house and gets two off a full nelson slam, followed by the dropkick for two. There’s a minute left and the Snapshot is broken up so Holly can hit the Alabama Slam. Melina dives in and covers Nitro though, presumably making her the Tag Team Champions as time expires.

Rating: C. Uh yeah fine, now can we PLEASE find some new challengers? The matches have been fine enough but Holly and Haas have lost three times now and weren’t interesting challengers in the first place. The fans are getting into Holly and they’re nothing close to a disaster or even bad, but we need something fresh.

Long video on Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio, going from their teaming together to their split, with Chavo Guerrero playing a great devil on Eddie’s shoulder.

Here’s Kurt Angle for his match with Booker and Sharmell but first, he needs to talk about Tazz not doing commentary during last week’s Kurt Angle Invitational. That comes off as disrespectful, so Angle has a clip of his own. That would be from his one night in ECW, where Tazz said Angle was a great amateur but he’s a great professional.

Back in the arena, Angle knows that it was Paul Heyman making Tazz say it. Tazz isn’t a wrestler like the people in ECW, though they weren’t wrestlers either. The WWE made him a star, so Angle wants Tazz to come with him to One Night Stand and kill ECW once and for all. Tazz takes his sunglasses off but doesn’t say anything.

Booker T./Sharmell vs. Kurt Angle

Thankfully Booker acts sane here and makes Sharmell stay down on the floor but the referee says everyone has to be in the ring at the same time. Angle knocks Booker outside so Sharmell runs (because she’s smart), allowing Booker to get back up and Catch Angle on the floor. A clothesline puts Booker on the floor again though and it’s time for more stalking. Like any distressed woman in wrestling, Sharmell trips over the steps and Angle throws her inside for a powerbomb, complete with hip swivel.

There’s a bit too much swiveling though and Booker hammers away. The Book End looks to set up the Houston Hangover but Angle crotches him. There’s a superplex but Angle can’t get up, so Sharmell covers him for two. We take a break (In this match???) and come back with Angle holding a Fujiwara armbar as Booker seems almost out. Booker fights back with chops but gets caught in the rolling German suplexes.

Angle takes Sharmell down into something close to a choke but seems to be whispering in her ear instead. Booker makes the save and gets caught in the Angle Slam for two. That’s enough for Angle to back Sharmell into the corner and take down the straps so she bites and slaps away. The low blow is countered into the ankle lock but Booker kicks him in the face.

Booker hits the spinning kick but misses the ax kick, allowing Angle to drive Booker into Sharmell and the referee at the same time. A superkick puts Angle on the floor but he’s back in with some chair shots to Booker and now Sharmell is all alone. Angle stacks her up in a rollup (you can imagine the positioning) for the pin.

Rating: F. The wrestling wasn’t even very good because Booker was going wild out there (makes perfect sense) but is there ANY reason why Booker and Sharmell tried to have the match? Long didn’t threaten them if they didn’t go through with it, so why not have Sharmell run away and just take the countout or DQ while Booker stays in the ring and beats Angle up? This made no sense and I spent the whole match wondering why they weren’t just doing the obvious thing. Oh and given how completely absurd this whole thing is, it’s about as much of a failure as you can get.

Post match Angle climbs on top of her so Booker makes the save to send a smiling Angle off.

Video of John Cena’s media tour for his album.

Heidenreich vs. Devon Nicholson

Nicholson is a tiny bit famous as Hannibal. Heidenreich goes to find a friend before the match and she looks just like Lindsay Lohan in The Parent Trap. He reads her a poem about having an unsure future in the Draft before pummeling Nicholson like the jobber that he is. The Boss Man Slam gives Heidenreich the pin as I try to get Do You Believe In Magic out of my head.

The women are backstage, as they tend to be, when Mark Jindrak comes up. He hopes there are some new women around here in the Draft. Jindrak: “Some ones that put out.” He is shouted off in a hurry.

Nunzio vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Hold on though as JBL needs to rant about how bad ECW was. He blames all of the violence in wrestling on ECW and is appalled at the idea of Paul Heyman being a genius. Heyman claims to have brought in a bunch of legends but in case you haven’t heard, he is a liar. JBL rants about the ECW wrestlers we got, including Sandman and Lance Storm (those two are not often listed together), before saying ECW will not invade New York. He will be one of the crusaders at One Night Stand and lead the forces against ECW.

Speaking of ECW, let’s make this an ECW Rules match. JBL boots him to the floor so Nunzio slips underneath the ring and comes out the other side with a kendo stick. Some kendo stick shots connect but the Cabinet comes in so the Clothesline From JBL can connect. The big kendo stick shot finishes Nunzio quick in a match that was secondary to the promo (which is fine here).

Booker and Sharmell come in to rant at Long, demanding a match with Angle. If Long won’t make it, Booker will do it in the streets. Long can’t guarantee anything, but if they’re both here after the Draft, it’s on.

Raw Rebound.

Big Show/John Cena vs. Carlito/Matt Morgan

Show’s shoulder and ribs are heavily taped up but Cena lets him start with….well hang on as Morgan and Carlito aren’t sure who is starting. Carlito drops to the floor so Cena throws him in and the chops are on. Morgan gets shoved off the apron and Carlito is tossed onto him for the big crash.

Back from a break with Show knocking Morgan into the corner and hitting some loud chops before bringing Cena in. A slam puts Morgan down but he’s fine enough to bring Cena into the corner so the villains can take over for the first time. Morgan misses an elbow though and it’s back to Show for the house cleaning. There’s a side slam to Morgan but it messes up the ribs all over again. Ever the well trained rookie, Morgan is smart enough to kick at the ribs and drives a knee into them for a bonus.

Carlito even makes himself useful with a left hand to the ribs. He even comes in to stay on the ribs but Show sends him into Morgan, which counts as a tag. The required bearhug goes on until Show fights out and chops away at everyone. Morgan breaks up the chokeslam but it’s off to Cena to pick up the pace. Show Cactus Clotheslines Morgan to the floor and Cena hits the Shuffle into the (sitout) FU for the pin on Carlito.

Rating: C-. Cena has rocketed from the top of the card into the superstar status so fast that it’s almost hard to believe. He was a big deal when he won the title but now he feels like the real star that WWE has wanted him to be. That presents a problem though as there is no one who can fight against him, at least not on Smackdown at the moment. Carlito isn’t someone who is believable against this Cena and that was very obvious the whole time here. To be fair though, that wasn’t exactly what they were going for and that helped a lot.

Cena checks on the injured Show to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. So yeah, other than Rey vs. Eddie, it is more than time for some fresh blood around here and that is painfully obvious. Angle vs. Booker is just disturbing and Cena needs a challenger, though at least the ECW stuff is helping things along a bit. The show wasn’t the worst, but it’s running out of gas and that is the kind of thing that can create some rough watches. Not a bad show, but that Angle vs. Booker stuff needs to be forgotten in a hurry.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 26, 2005
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re past Judgment Day and that means it’s going to be a good while before Smackdown has its own pay per view again. ECW One Night Stand is going to be its own thing and then Raw has Vengeance. Then again the Draft starts next month and that is going to shake things up anyway so it might be a long time before we know what we are going to have in the first place. Let’s get to it.

Here are Judgment Day’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the rather violent I Quit match with John Cena making JBL quit and then beating him up anyway. Quite the heroic action, but that much blood and that kind of a star making performance make up for it.

Opening sequence.

We’ll start things off with Carlito’s Cabana (becoming more common) and Matt Morgan is out with Carlito. The guest this week is someone who earned a lot of respect from the locker room at Judgment Day: Carlito himself. Carlito praises himself but also thanks Morgan, and we see a clip of Morgan laying Big Show out. Cue Theodore Long, with Carlito designating him as NOT cool. Long makes fun of Morgan’s stutter while threatening to suspend him if he goes too far.

With that out of the way, Long explains the Draft, which will see a random wrestler move from Raw to Smackdown and vice versa. Therefore, next week might be everyone’s last on the show so Long has an idea. Tonight it’s a winner’s choice battle royal with the winner getting any match they choose. That’s cool with Carlito, who wants to win and get a WWE Title match against John Cena. Long likes the enthusiasm so Carlito can have another match tonight….against the Big Show. Carlito hugs Morgan out of fear.

Rey Mysterio is getting ready when he talks about making Eddie Guerrero pay tonight. When he wins the battle royal, he’s coming after Eddie again.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Charlie Haas/Hardcore Holly

MNM is defending in a rematch from Sunday. Holly and Mercury start things off but Nitro gets in a cheap shot at the bell. That’s fine with Holly, who drops Mercury with a belly to back suplex for two. Mercury chops him into the corner, which is just fine with Holly. Now it’s Nitro being brought in for more chops from Holly and the hanging kick to the low abdomen keeps Mercury in trouble.

Haas comes in for two off an Oklahoma roll but Mercury drives him into the corner without much effort. That means it’s off to Nitro, who gets dropkicked out of the air to put him down as well. We take a very sudden break and come back with Nitro coming in off a blind tag and getting in a cheap shot. The chinlock goes on, followed by a double gutbuster to really put Haas down. Haas grabs an armdrag and dives for the corner but Nitro powers him straight back into the corner to cut the crowd off again.

Holly chases Mercury around the ring instead of being on the apron for a tag, allowing Melina to rake Haas’ eyes. Not that it matters as Haas gets over for the tag a few seconds later and Holly starts cleaning house. Everything breaks down and the referee gets bumped, meaning there’s no count off the Alabama Slam. Nitro hits Holly with a chair and the referee sees that for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Haas and Holly have managed to do a little bit better than just being the lame team of combined jobbers, but at the same time there was no reason to believe that they were going to win the titles here. MNM continues to be a great team who needs some better opponents, which has been the case for a long list of teams over the last….well several years long stretches in company history.

Post match Haas chases everyone off with the chair.

We look at Booker T. and Sharmell beating up Kurt Angle on Sunday.

Booker says he’s never been prouder of Sharmell and he’ll never forget to take out the trash.

Here’s John Cena for a chat and the fans are rather happy to see him. Cena gives a more reserved than usual thank you and talks about how the chain represents never giving up. There had been a lot of talk about him being a one hit wonder and a bad champion. Then JBL said two words to change all of that on Sunday. Cena never said those words and therefore, THE CHAMP IS HERE.

JBL was right that Cena would suffer and bleed like never before and he was right. But when JBL said that he would take Cena’s soul, he was completely wrong. JBL QUIT and he must feel humiliated because of everything. Cena: “He’s got to feel like some pathetic shell of a man. And you are!”

Cue JBL, who looks a bit like Vince as he gets out of the limo. JBL slowly gets in the ring and says he doesn’t make excuses. That’s why he’s rich and the longest reigning WWE Champion in the last decade. JBL gave Cena a beating but he would never quit. He’s beaten everyone but he isn’t sure if he can beat Cena. It’s true that Cena is the man, but it’s just for now.

Someone like Cena will implode like Kurt Cobain or Mike Tyson. Then JBL will be there to become champion again. Cena says the people will decide your legacy and if he goes down, it’s in a blaze of glory. He’s a soldier who doesn’t care about his legacy, but JBL does. That’s why Cena has something for him (Cena: “You’re an idiot but you’ve done a lot of great things.”): a tribute video of JBL’s career. It had some classic matches and moments so JBL would love to see it.

We see the tribute video….which quickly turns into JBL saying I QUIT over and over. Cena dubs him the most celebrated quitter in WWE history and JBL leaves in disgust. This was a nice moment for Cena at first before it broke down into the usual banter between the two, though JBL had it coming to him after being a jerk, even in congratulating Cena on his win.

Carlito vs. Big Show

Show starts with the chops but stops to yell at Morgan. With Carlito still down, Show steps on his chest but Morgan grabs Show’s boot, earning himself an ejection. Carlito tries to leave as well, only to get pulled over the top and back inside in a big crash. Show: “YOU LOST YOUR STUTTERING FRIEND!” A huge chop takes Carlito down again and Show shoves him away with ease. Carlito gets up fast though and hits a middle rope dropkick to the leg. Not that it matters as the chokeslam gives Show the easy pin.

Rating: D. This was just a way to set up the post match angle and continue to remind us that Morgan exists. That being said, you’re not going to get anywhere with Morgan as a monster with the stuttering deal, but I’m sure WWE doesn’t understand the problem. What we got barely existed, but I can always go for seeing Carlito get destroyed.

Post match Morgan comes out and kicks Show in the head, setting up an F5 (in slow motion but an F5) through the announcers’ table.

We look back at the pretty awesome ECW funeral from Raw with Vince McMahon, Eric Bischoff and Paul Heyman hyping up One Night Stand. You can feel Heyman’s emotion coming through as his baby is getting one more chance.

Kurt Angle comes out for the Kurt Angle Invitational but first he needs to talk about how dark of a time it is for him. He got beaten up by Booker T. and then got humiliated by Booker’s gutter s*** wife. Then he had to hear about ECW, which isn’t his kind of wrestling. He even went to an ECW show and it made him so sick that he left halfway through. That’s why he is coming to One Night Stand with a bunch of tickets for some Smackdown wrestlers. Angle yells at Tazz, promising to bounce the ECW wrestlers like Heyman bounced checks. Tazz takes off his headset and sunglasses but never gets up. On with the destruction.

Kurt Angle vs. Robert

We never hear his last name but it’s Robert Fury of OVW non-fame. Angle runs him over as usual and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock. Tazz kept his headset off and glared at Angle throughout the match.

Post match, Angle says on with the battle royal.

Battle Royal

Kurt Angle, Heidenreich, Carlito, Matt Morgan, Booker T., Hardcore Holly, Charlie Haas, Billy Kidman, Chavo Guerrero, Rey Mysterio, Eddie Guerrero, Funaki, Shannon Moore, Akio, Doug Basham, Danny Basham, Orlando Jordan, Paul London, Scotty 2 Hotty, Nunzio, Johnny Nitro, Mark Jindrak, Joey Mercury

Hold on though as Eddie chairs Rey from behind during his entrance. The beatdown ensues with referees running out for the late save. So there is no Rey, Morgan starts on the floor and Eddie (who has cut his nose somehow) drops to the floor as well. London is out first, because that’s what a champion means around here. Angle tosses Funaki and Kidman clotheslines Mercury out.

Akio is eliminated by Booker as Morgan blocks Carlito from being thrown out. There goes Jindrak and we take a break. Back with Nitro having been eliminated and Holly dumping Kidman. Angle gets rid of Heidenreich (which Cole calls a disqualification) as the ring is starting to thin out a bit. There goes Chavo at Scotty’s hands and Haas is out as well, with a nasty landing where his foot hits the apron on the way down.

Morgan pulls out Nunzio and Funaki but the distraction lets Booker eliminate Carlito. Eddie comes back in and tosses Scotty. We’re down to the Bashams, Jordan, Eddie, Angle, Holly and Booker but Eddie gets rid of Holly. Cue Rey to fight Eddie and take him out with a headscissors. Rey, who went over the top to the apron, goes back in and comes back out through the middle ropes (smart man) to dive onto Eddie. Referees have to break it up again as Eddie looks shell shocked.

We take another break and come back with Rey, the Bashams, Jordan, Angle and Booker (I guess Morgan was either never an entrant or just walked out without being eliminated). Some double teaming has Booker on the apron but he fights back in and clotheslines his way to freedom.

Spinebusters abound as Booker beats up the Cabinet by himself and gets rid of all three of them. Angle tosses Booker though and we’re down to Angle vs. Mysterio. Rey hammers on Angle in the corner but Angle powers him down with a throw. There’s a suplex to make it even worse but Rey gets in a dropkick and sends him to the apron. The 619 misses and Angle picks the ankle but Rey rolls out of the ankle lock.

They head to the apron and Angle has to hold on by the bottom rope. Some right hands can’t get rid of Angle, who climbs back over the top until Rey dropkicks him down again. This time Angle gets back in and snaps off a belly to belly but Rey is right back with the 619. Rey loads up a springboard but lands on a low blow, setting up an Angle Slam for the elimination to give Angle the win.

Rating: C+. The stuff after Eddie got in made it a lot better, but the first part with the losers in there didn’t do it any favors. That being said, the second half and the ending were enough to make up for the boring first half and it wound up working out pretty well. It was a good way to showcase the upper midcard talent, which is where Smackdown shines. I’m not wild on the Booker vs. Angle story but it’s a fresh feud between two talented guys. Eddie vs. Rey continues to be good too and now we have a reason for another match. It’s one of the better battle royals in awhile so I’ll take what I can get.

Overall Rating: C. This show did a great job of showing the difference between the good and the bad around here. The best done stuff on the show is going quite well, with Cena looking like a star, Eddie vs. Rey being some incredible stuff and Angle vs. Booker being fine if you can leave out one key element.

Then there’s the rest of the show, with names like Hardcore Holly and Charlie Haas getting a second title shot, the Cruiserweight Champion being eliminated like any given jobber, the United States Champion being nothing more than a lackey, and someone who should be a can’t miss prospect being reduced to a stuttering joke. That is a very firm line being drawn up and down this show and it’s showing badly. The good stuff is rather good but the weaker stuff is….well it isn’t terrible, but it’s not interesting and that’s worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Judgment Day 2005
Date: May 22, 2005
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 9,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time for another Smackdown pay per view and that could go in a variety of ways. Granted it tends to be a variety of bad with these things but there are a few different levels. This time around there are two matches that look good with JBL vs. John Cena in an I Quit match and Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio, which should be enough to get it past bad. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on Eddie vs. Rey with Eddie being presented as the sinner. Then there is Kurt Angle who has surrendered to his desires of passion. Finally, you have JBL and Cena, who are headed for guaranteed agony.

There isn’t even an intro from the announcers as we go straight to the first match.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Charlie Haas/Hardcore Holly

MNM is defending and Melina has a mic on the way to the ring. Charlie throws Nitro around to start and even lifts him into the air by the arm. An armdrag gets two (yes an armdrag) and it’s off to Holly, which sends Nitro bailing into the corner. Mercury comes in and jumps over Holly but gets caught (mostly) with the dropkick.

The hanging kick to the ribs set up the corner chops to Mercury, plus one for Nitro for a bonus. The Alabama Slam is loaded up but the referee yells at Haas, allowing Nitro to make the save with a superkick. We actually get a LET’S GO HARDCORE chant as Mercury hits a neckbreaker for two. Nitro grabs the chinlock with a knee in the back, which is broken up in a hurry with Holly hitting the full nelson slam for the double knockdown.

Haas gets the hot tag and hits a dropkick of his own to start the house cleaning. The big dive over the top connects and a small package gets two on Mercury. Everything breaks down and Holly goes shoulder first into the post, allowing Nitro to get in a cheap shot from the apron. The Snapshot retains the titles.

Rating: C. I came into this expecting nothing and got a completely watchable match so we’ll call this a nice surprise. Haas and Holly aren’t great challengers but they did what they could here and got the fans into it. MNM is a very good team though and should have the titles for a long time.

We recap Big Show getting taken down by Carlito’s poison apple and Carlito debuting Matt Morgan as his new bodyguard.

Big Show vs. Carlito

Before the match, Carlito talks about Randy Moss (former Minnesota Viking) saying he left because Minnesota wasn’t cool. They don’t respect talent like Matt Morgan, who is cool because he’s big and strong. Tonight, Morgan is going to watch Carlito destroy Big Show. Carlito bails to the floor to start with Show eventually tossing him into the corner for the overhand chops.

Morgan’s distraction doesn’t help as Show tosses Carlito again and stalks away a bit. A slam keeps Carlito in trouble so Morgan low bridges Show to the floor to finally put him in trouble. Back in and Show beats Carlito up even more but the referee gets bumped, allowing Morgan to offer another distraction. This one works a bit better as Carlito gets in a low blow into Morgan’s F5 so Carlito can steal the pin.

Rating: D-. This wouldn’t have even been a good TV match as it was more a way to set up Morgan vs. Big Show in the battle of the giants down the line. I still don’t get much out of Carlito. Maybe it’s the goofy looking hair or the character in general, but he just does not appeal to me. He has his moments and can do well enough in the ring, but it never has clicked for me.

We recap Booker T. vs. Kurt Angle. Booker eliminated Angle from a #1 contenders match so Angle got obsessed. This caused him to go nuts about Booker’s wife Sharmell, who he described as a “gutter sl**.” Angle went into full on stalker mode on Sharmell and claimed that she liked it, sending Booker further over the edge. Angle has promised to dominate both of them tonight so Booker superkicked a TV.

Sharmell gives Booker a pep talk but gets a delivery: lingerie and handcuffs, but they’re not from Booker. Cole: “Is Kurt Angle absolutely insane?” Yes, yes he is.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Paul London

Chavo is challenging. They trade kicks to the legs to start until Chavo takes him down and hammer away. After Cole explains that Chavo won the title from Chavo, he talks about a tilt-a-whirl knee to the knee. We hit something like a seated abdominal stretch to stay on the ribs which were banged up a few weeks ago. London gets up with a hurricanrana but the 450 hits raised knees to put the champ right back in trouble.

A belly to back suplex gives Chavo two and a dropkick to the ribs gets two. The rather logical abdominal stretch goes on but London slips out and hits his own belly to back suplex. A leg lariat keeps Chavo in trouble and an enziguri gets two. London spinwheel kicks him down again and there’s the big flip dive to the floor for a bonus. Chavo is back up with his own dive but London crotches him back inside. A backdrop puts Chavo down again and the 450 retains the title.

Rating: C+. The story of the match made sense and they beat each other up well enough, but the interest just wasn’t there for the most part. I’m not sure what you can do to make Chavo vs. London interesting and that’s one of the biggest problems with the title. The wrestlers are treated as second class talent and while the match was fine, it comes and goes and it doesn’t draw much interest.

Booker is looking for Angle. After searching a few bathrooms, Booker tells the locker room to tell him if they see Angle.

Sharmell is in Booker’s locker room when Angle appears and shoves her on the couch. He puts his hand over her mouth and says he can get her anytime. After the match, she’s his. As usual, Booker comes off as REALLY STUPID for leaving her alone when Angle is nowhere to be found.

Kurt Angle vs. Booker T.

Booker goes right at him (well duh) with right hands and a choke on the ropes as this is likely to be more of a fight than anything else. Kurt reverses in the corner and drives some shoulders into the ribs. The chinlock goes on early but Booker fights up and gets in a neck snap across the top.

Booker shrugs off a nearly desperation ankle lock attempt and drapes Angle over the top for the ax kick. Since that’s not big enough for a match like this, Angle posts him to take over again. Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex and we hit the chinlock with a bodyscissors. That’s broken up as well and Booker hammers away, only to crotch himself on a side kick attempt. Angle pounds away in the corner before putting on the waistlock to keep Booker down.

Rating: B-. The match was the usual upper midcard/main event style stuff but the story is just so disturbing in a lot of ways that it loses most of its positive value. Booker needed to be a little angrier here, but at least he started out aggressive, which is more than a lot of people seem to understand in this kind of a story. Odds are we’ll see this again, but hopefully without the need for a shower inducing Angle promos.

Post match Sharmell runs out as Angle beats up Booker some more. Angle pulls out the handcuffs but Booker makes the save and cuffs Angle to the ropes. Sharmell slaps the heck out of him and kicks him low for the feel good moment.

Boxing legend Roberto Duran is here.

Tazz has keys to victory in the I Quit match. #3: Don’t quit.

US Title: Orlando Jordan vs. Heidenreich

Heidenreich is challenging after beating Jordan in a non-title match on Smackdown. Hold on though as Heidenreich needs to find a new friend. This time it’s a young girl named Alex who screams a lot. She sits in a special chair (which looks rather unspecial) and he reads a poem about looking for friends in Minneapolis and wanting to hear the Heidenreich chant. Jordan dropkicks him through the ropes to start and stomps away in the corner with more aggression than usual.

Heidenreich doesn’t like Jordan yelling at Alex though and hammers away, only to get sent outside for his efforts. A belly to back suplex gets a very delayed two and we hit the neck crank. Heidenreich fights up and does his walk to start the comeback, including the pummeling in the corner. Jordan kicks him in the face and grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two more. A drop toehold sends Heidenreich throat first into the middle rope and a DDT retains the title.

Rating: F. It’s the United States Title and they can’t come up with ANYTHING better than this? Heidenreich is the big goofy face and you have him lose clean in five minutes? Jordan is just such a vacuum of charisma and the title is dying more and more every day he has the title. I know it isn’t in great shape at the moment, but they can’t find anyone else to fight over the thing?

Post match Alex helps Heidenreich up.

JBL talks about how lives are broken in a fight and you are no longer a man if you quit. A few years ago Cena was in the stands cheering for whoever JBL was beating for a championship. Tonight Cena has no backup plan and he’ll quit to the wrestling god.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. They had been partners but Eddie started to get jealous over the fact that he couldn’t beat Rey. Then Chavo Guerrero got in Eddie’s head and told Eddie that Rey would never be family. The two of them got in a few arguments until Eddie fully turned on him as he went completely over the edge. Now Rey wants revenge as Eddie needs to prove that he can beat Mysterio. This has been incredible stuff from Guerrero, who keeps falling further and further into the jealousy and it is going to near perfection.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Rey has bad ribs coming in. Eddie tries to sneak up on Rey as he prays in the corner so Rey slugs away as it turns into an early fist fight. Some kicks to the ribs and shots to the head have Eddie in more trouble. They head outside and Eddie whips him into the steps and then the post for a bonus. We’ll add the announcers’ table too as Eddie stays on the bad ribs. Another drop onto the table has Rey in real trouble but the referee pulls Eddie off of him.

They head back in as the EDDIE SUCKS chants are in full swing. Eddie shouts down at Rey and there’s a belly to back suplex to bang up the ribs some more. The abdominal stretch goes on for a good while before Eddie plants him face/ribs first with a reverse powerbomb. The bandage comes off of Rey’s ribs and it’s a half crab to work them over even more. Rey slips out and scores with an enziguri and they’re both down for a breather. A springboard dropkick gives Rey two and they’re both a little staggered.

Eddie dropkicks the knee though and puts on a full Boston crab. Now it’s an STF with Rey crawling as hard as he can to the ropes. With that out of the way, it’s time to go to the floor with Eddie loading up the steps. Rey saves himself with a ram into the post though and they’re both down again. Back in and they slug it out with Eddie doing his dance until Rey hits….a big boot? From Rey Mysterio? The springboard seated senton gives Rey two so he hammers away in the corner with rights and lefts.

The missed charge goes shoulder first into the post though and Eddie hits a top rope superplex to destroy the ribs even worse. Rey slips out of the Third Amigo though and a hurricanrana (with a leg around the body instead of the head) looks to load up the 619. Cue Chavo for a distraction though and Eddie grabs a chair, which is dropkicked into his knee. Rey takes Chavo down and hits the 619 on Eddie, but the West Coast Pop is chaired out of the air for the DQ.

Rating: B+. This worked incredibly well with Eddie’s mind breaking down more and more every second until he forgot why he was here in the first place and got disqualified instead of going for the win. The ending keeps the story moving forward too as you can’t have Eddie win here and Rey pinning him has been done before. This advances things and gives Rey a reason to want revenge while knowing he can still beat Eddie. Well booked and well wrestled, but did you expect anything else?

Post match Eddie chairs him down and Rey has to be helped out.

We recap JBL vs. John Cena. JBL lost the title to Cena at Wrestlemania but has since been obsessed with the idea of getting the title back. He sees Cena as a poor champion because Cena is a street thug so it’s a match where someone has to give up, with an I Quit match. This is likely to be the violent showdown that Wrestlemania wasn’t, and that’s a good thing.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and this is an I Quit match. JBL, with the older title design, comes out in the limo so Cena rides out on the back of a flatbed truck, which features a turntable on the back. They trade some long form armbars to start until an armbar sends JBL bailing to the floor. A suplex brings him back in but he pounds Cena in the back to block a backdrop. JBL DDT’s him for a cover, though not for a count because, you know, there aren’t any in this match.

Things head outside with Cena sending him face first into various things before going into the crowd. A swinging neckbreaker onto the concrete doesn’t have much effect on Cena so it’s back to ringside. JBL grabs the mic and demands that Cena quit so Cena slugs away, only to get sent into the steps. Just like on Smackdown, JBL grabs a belt and whips away, followed by a choke around the post.

With that broken up, JBL loads up a powerbomb through the announcers’ table but gets backdropped through the other instead. Cena throws him across the other table so JBL comes up with the Eddie Guerrero chair to the face. The bloody Cena staggers to his feet so JBL hits him with the steps and mocks You Can’t See Me. The Clothesline From JBL connects and so does the second for good measure.

Now it’s time to choke with a chain as Cena is in big trouble. There’s a low blow to cut Cena down again but JBL talks too much trash, allowing Cena to initiate the finishing sequence. The FU connects so JBL takes a walk, with Cena following and sending him into the limo. Another swinging neckbreaker drops Cena onto the hood, which is now covered in blood too.

When it doesn’t break, Cena takes it off and drops it on the hood, meaning it’s time to go to the flatbed truck. JBL is sent into a C02 tank but is fine enough to hit a DDT onto the bed for the double knockdown. Cena uses a microphone to knock JBL off of a speaker and through the table as JBL can barely walk. With nothing else working, Cena grabs an exhaust pipe off of the truck and goes over to JBL….who quits out of fear.

Rating: A-. I’ve always loved this one as Cena looked like the warrior and the conquering hero who JBL completely underestimated what he was capable of doing. Cena needed a win like this and he looked like a champion here, which isn’t something that he had done before. This was a big step forward for him and the definitive end to the feud with JBL. Great match, better performance from Cena, and a heck of a blade job.

Post match Cena knocks him through a glass wall anyway and poses, COVERED in blood, to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The shorter run time (just over two and a half hours) helps this one quite a bit as those last two matches, which eat up about 40% of the show are both great and more than enough to make up for a lot of the problems with the other stuff. The two big matches being that good aren’t exactly a surprise and Booker vs. Angle was good enough to carry the rest of the show. Just don’t watch Jordan vs. Heidenreich ever again. Check out the two main events if you have time as they both hold up very well. The rest….eh just watch Wrestlemania again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 19, 2005
Location: Tyson Events Center, Sioux City, Iowa
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Judgment Day and most of the card has been set. We could be in for a good show on Sunday with the two biggest matches looking solid, though there isn’t much underneath them. I’m not sure what to expect from this week’s show but I don’t exactly have my hopes up outside of Eddie Guerrero’s rapid fire loss of sanity. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Kurt Angle invading Sharmell’s dressing room last week and attacking Booker T. who failed in a rescue attempt. Cole asking what Angle did to Sharmell behind closed doors doesn’t bode well.

Opening sequence.

It’s Carlito’s Cabana to get things going. Carlito recaps last week’s edition, including Big Show turning down his offer and eating a poison apple as a result. Back in the arena, Carlito talks about having trouble getting the stains out of the Cabana’s carpet. Now though, Big Show has challenged him to a match on Sunday, which Carlito has accepted.

However, he isn’t coming into the match alone because he has a new bodyguard: Matt Morgan. Cue Morgan, who stutters so much that he can’t really say yes. Carlito: “You want some water?” The joke is so funny that he tries three times before going with a simple ok. So yes, he’s officially Porky Pig. Anyway here’s Big Show for the brawl but Morgan chairs him down and gets out with Carlito.

JBL goes to the inner city to explain to some kids why John Cena, and various rappers, are all about. Rappers belong in jail because they are thugs, just like Cena. JBL lists off some lyrics, which even approve of premarital sex. JBL is taking the title on Sunday and helping America.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

JBL kicks him in the face at the bell and drops the elbows. A swinging neckbreaker gets two but JBL charges into a boot in the corner. Scotty hits a superkick but JBL bounces off the ropes with the Clothesline. That’s not enough for JBL so he hammers away in the corner and that’s a DQ.

Post match JBL says he doesn’t care because nothing can stop him in three days. For tonight though, Scotty has the chance to quit but refuses to, meaning JBL punches him even more. JBL finds a belt and whips Scotty on the announcers’ table, eventually choking Scotty into saying he quits.

John Cena threw out the first pitch at a Red Sox game.

Booker yells at Theodore Long about what Angle did last week. There won’t be a match with Angle tonight though because he has been banned from the building. Instead, Booker can face Mark Jindrak, but that isn’t cool with him. Angle will apologize tonight, but that’s not enough for Booker.

Post break, Jindrak comes up to Sharmell and talks about Angle having a fetish for…..you know…..gutter sl***. This turns into an argument over whether or not Jindrak thinks she is one, so here’s Booker (who is rather lax about his wife being alone after last week) to beat him up. Booker knocks him into the arena and busts Jindrak open….as the match is starting now.

Booker T. vs. Mark Jindrak

Booker hammers away in the corner and hits the scissors kick. The referee tries to pull Booker off, allowing Jindrak to get in the big left hand. That’s enough for Booker, who comes back with the Book End and the ax kick for the pin.

JBL tells the Bashams to beat up John Cena tonight and promises to be out there with them. Long comes in and says he can’t get involved with the threat of a fine. Short, to the point, explained the situation. Why is that so hard to do so often?

Video on the awesome Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio feud. Eddie’s face and eyes last week were outstanding.

Here’s Eddie, still carrying Rey’s mask, for a chat. It takes a little time for Eddie to say anything so he stares at the mask, throws it down and stomps on it. He leaves without saying anything in another good segment.

Clips from the Judgment Day press conference.

Heidenreich vs. Orlando Jordan

Non-title and COME ON ALREADY. Hang on though as Heidenreich has to find a new friend. His quest includes a song and a quick dance, which is more charming than it should be. Jordan says hang on because you don’t keep the champ waiting. No one likes Heidenreich and after he loses, no one will want to be his friend.

Jordan stomps away and hits a clothesline to start, followed by a knee to the head. The hammering continues as Heidenreich pulls himself up, only to get stomped back down. We hit the chinlock until Jordan lets go to shout about it, allowing Heidenreich to get up and do his fist pump dance. A big boot gives Heidenreich two so Jordan pounds him down again. That’s about it though as Jordan charges straight into the Boss Man Slam for the fast pin.

Rating: D-. This one is bad just due to the people involved, though Heidenreich is FAR better in this role and the march could have gone somewhere in the long term. He just needed to stop being so serious and have his wrestling time cut down by about 80% and things get a little better. Why was that so complicated?

We look at Angle vs. Booker/Sharmell over the last few weeks.

Judgment Day rundown.

Joey Mercury vs. Hardcore Holly

Half of Sunday’s title match so Johnny Nitro and Charlie Haas are here too. Mercury hiptosses him down a few times to start so Holly goes with the chops in the corner. A neckbreaker (complete with a camera motion) gives Mercury two and we hit the neck crank. Mercury lets that go and gets crotched on top, setting up the top rope superplex. The backdrop into the dropkick sets up a full nelson slam but Holly won’t cover. Instead it’s a top rope clothesline for two and the Alabama Slam for the clean pin to put Mercury away.

Rating: D+. This is the kind of win that you need to give Holly from time to time and before the title match made it even better. The team has no chance of winning the titles on Sunday so giving them a win could help a little bit. I mean, it can only get so far but it’s better than not trying.

Raw Rebound.

Nelly thinks Cena is a talented rapper.

Kurt Angle is at WWE Studios in Connecticut where he has to give an apology to the fans, Booker and Sharmell. Last week was a mistake but you have to understand. He was on fire after Wrestlemania and it should have been a formality before he was WWE Champion again. Booker stopped that so Angle needed to get revenge but he went too far. So yeah he’s sorry.

Now that they have what they’ve wanted, it’s about what he wants. Angle wants Sharmell to admit that she is a gutter sl**, because he saw proof last week. He and Sharmell kissed last week when the door closed and she liked it. Sharmell molested and fondled him….and they both loved it. This Sunday, Angle is going to make Booker scream for a different reason. Then after dominating Booker, he’ll dominate Sharmell and show her how to do a real Spinarooni.

Booker superkicks a TV with Angle’s face on it. That promo was so uncomfortable that it damaged a television.

John Cena is reading JBL’s financial book, which includes chapters on diversifying your portfolio, making Orlando Jordan’s hair stand up (Cena: “THERE’S A PICTURE!”) and how to say I Quit when John Cena is beating you up. Cena says he isn’t a wrestling god but he is…..Josh Matthews: “A prophet! A street prophet!” Cena takes the mic and sends Josh away, saying it was as sad as JBL’s sex life. See, Cena can respect JBL for his success but on the streets, you never quit, and Cena won’t quit on the people.

John Cena vs. Bashams

Non-title and JBL is at ringside. Cena takes over on Doug to start by grabbing a headlock and running him over. Danny comes in but Cena is smart enough to bail to the floor before some cheating can ensue. Things settle back down with Doug hammering away but getting taken into the corner for choking from Danny and yelling from JBL. Another knockdown sets up the chinlock so JBL grabs the mic and demands that Cena quit.

Doug gets in a cheap shot to cut Cena down again and more JBL shouting ensues. A belly to back suplex gives Danny two but Cena fights up and grabs the rope to block a DDT attempt. JBL shouts more and more as some suplexes put Cena down. Cena blocks a double version though and slugs away, setting up the ProtoBomb on Doug. The FU finishes Doug for the pin after a bit more sweat than you would expect.

Rating: D+. JBL’s shouting was annoying but it was also the only thing that mattered int the match. The Bashams were nothing more than lackeys here and that’s a good role for them. The match wasn’t anything of note because it wasn’t like there were many options other than this or JBL running in for the DQ. Not a good match, but it was fine for a short form build.

Cena stares JBL down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a show built around the stories and the good outweighs the bad 2-1 with Eddie being incredible, the battle of the John’s being better than expected and Booker vs. Angle just being creepy. The wrestling wasn’t great though as a Hardcore Holly match and a Heidenreich match is a little too much. It made me want to see Judgment Day more than I did earlier though so they’re going in the right direction. Just do more of the good and less of the bad, which is pretty much a universal rule.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: May 12, 2005
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 3,700
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re on our way to Judgment Day and that means we should be in for Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Most of the time you have to worry about how the big match is going to go but how bad can a Mysterio vs. Guerrero match go? Other than that, we continue the build to John Cena vs. JBL II. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Rey vs. Eddie, with the latter attacking Rey again last week. Chavo Guerrero seems to be causing all of this, which adds another layer.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eddie, on foot and debuting Can You Feel The Heat as his new theme music. He grabs a chair and has a seat, plus a spotlight for a bonus. Everyone has been asking why he took Rey out last week and it’s simple: he was giving Rey what he wanted. He pulls out Rey’s mask and shouts DO YOU THINK THAT MAKES HIM HAPPY??? It’s Rey’s fault and what else could he have expected Eddie to do?

Rey drove him to this, plus all of these people. The fans have been living off of his Latino Heat but he got it all back last week. Eddie likes feeling like this and grabs the camera, demanding that it listen to him. He tells Rey to think about his son and daughter, because Eddie is about to hurt their papa. Rey has been talking about returning at Judgment Day, but Eddie advises against it. Right now, Eddie has his blood on his hands and if Rey comes back, Eddie will have his life.

This was GREAT and one of the best things WWE has done in a long time. It’s an excellent example of things only making sense to the heel, who is the only one that needs to understand what is going on. Eddie sees things differently and has been driven to everything he’s done by his jealousy. Yeah it was an extreme response, but it was everyone else’s fault because he hadn’t done anything wrong. Eddie sold the heck out of it too and looked crazed and angry, which is a rather dangerous combination. Excellent stuff here.

Heidenreich vs. Spike Dudley

This however is not likely to be excellent. Before the match, Heidenreich talks about asking Spike to be his friend but Spike said no. Heidenreich knows he can find a friend here and picks a kid out of the crowd. The kid, Jordan, would like to hear one of Heidenreich’s Disasterpieces, which is about looking for friends before he fights. Jordan gets to be in Heidenreich’s corner as Spike beats Heidenreich up in another corner.

Spike even comes outside to yell at Jordan so Heidenreich makes the save and finishes with a Boss Man Slam. Heidenreich still isn’t any good but if you have him as something goofy like this, he’s a lot less annoying. This is the last Spike match we’ll be seeing and he would be pretty much out of the mainstream wrestling scene in about two years. For someone his size, he had quite a nice career and that’s pretty impressive.

Sharmell comes in to see Booker, who gives her a kiss and a spank. They wind up on a couch and laughter ensues.

Chavo talks to MNM about Eddie being so vicious lately. There’s a six man tag later and Paul London is looking for partners. Chavo approves of this new partnership.

We look back at Kurt Angle chasing Sharmell last week and nearly putting her in the ankle lock.

Angle says that Sharmell started it by slapping him first. He wouldn’t have done anything to her because he doesn’t hurt women. No, Angle makes them feel very good. Everyone has vices and his happens to be “gutter sl***s like Booker T.’s wife.” Angle knows he probably has some psychological disorder but he needs to say something.

Angle: “Booker, I want to have sex with your wife. And I’m not just talking any kind of sex with your wife. I’m talking, you know, that kind of bestiality sex with your wife. That kind of perverted sex.” The fans rightfully boo this out of the building because WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??? I mean I know it’s Vince (or maybe Angle) but what could have been a good feud just went flying off a cliff and bounced all the way down.

MNM/Chavo Guerrero vs. Paul London/Hardcore Holly/Charlie Haas

London works on Nitro’s arm to start and it’s quickly off to Charlie to stay on said arm. A shoulder breaker and a middle rope knee to the shoulder keeps Nitro down as everything breaks down for a bit. Mercury gets in a cheap shot to take over on Haas and Chavo comes in for a belly to back suplex. Haas fights up without too much trouble and dives over for the hot tag off to Holly. London comes in with a double high crossbody and a hurricanrana to Chavo as everything breaks down again. Chavo can’t get the Gory Bomb on London but he can get a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and that’s all you could expect in something like this. The Cruiserweight Title is rather worthless but that has to be expected. Chavo is a good choice for a heel but he has been around the thing for a long time now and we need something fresh. It isn’t a good combination for a not great match and a boring story and that’s what we had here.

John Cena had an autograph signing for his CD.

Here is JBL for a chat. He plugs the re-release of his financial book, which is receiving the best reviews since the Bible. You can find it in bookstores and online, but you won’t see it with a parental advisory, which Cena’s CD has. Cena is a bad example and role model, along with being a bad champion. JBL talks about everything he’s been through in the last years but he has never quit. Those words never came across his mind and at Judgment Day, he is busting Cena open and making him quit.

JBL will find out that Cena is who he says he is and that is a wrestling god. Throughout the world, the fans will be chanting his name….and here’s Cena to interrupt. The fight is on but the Cabinet comes in to take Cena apart. Of all people, Funaki, Nunzio and Shannon Moore come out for the save. With that being his best hope, Cena fights up himself as the locker room comes out to keep them apart. The fight breaks out again and gets broken up just as fast as Cena is rather pleased with the whole thing.

Post break, here’s everything you just saw.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Jimmy Jacobs

Another one of those future names who means nothing at the moment. Eddie kicks away and elbows him in the face to start but stops to yell at Mysterio’s mask on the post. He even puts the mask on Jacobs and hammers away before tossing him outside as the dominance continues. Back in and Eddie grabs a chair, thinks about it with a crazed look on his face, and hits Jacobs with a brainbuster onto the chair for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t about the wrestling but rather just showing how crazy Eddie has gone over the last few weeks. The hyper intense Eddie is a very fresh twist for him and it’s making things more interesting. It helps when you have someone who can perform at this kind of a level. Not a good match, but very good character stuff.

Post match Eddie yells at the mask, saying Rey better not show up.

Judgment Day rundown.

Cole and Tazz talk about Cena’s music video.

And now, Cena’s music video.

Matt Morgan vs. Funaki

Before the match, Morgan talks about how people make fun of the way Funaki talks while stuttering heavily. SEE, IT’S FUNNY! A big boot knocks Funaki silly and another shot to the head knocks him out. The suplex into the Rock Bottom finishes Funaki in a hurry.

Raw Rebound.

Booker tells Sharmell to stay in the back tonight. That does not bode well.

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana and his guest this week is the Big Show. Carlito gets straight to the point: he wants Show to be his bodyguard. Show: “You want me to play second banana to you?” Carlito: “No…..we don’t do bananas here…..we do apples.” Carlito shows us some stills of Big Show in the sumo match at Wrestlemania, which was embarrassing. They could be unstoppable together, but Show says he needs Carlito as much as he needs a bigger shoe size.

Carlito grabs the apple but Show grabs him by the throat and eats the apple. Before the chokeslam goes through, Show hunches over and grabs his stomach. He can’t get up and Carlito says that it can only take one bad apple to spoil the bunch and Show just ate that apple. Carlito pours the apples over him and leaves Show laying. That’s some very lucky foresight from Carlito, though I don’t know how much we can expect from the match.

Kurt Angle vs. Booker T.

No Sharmell and Booker is rightfully ticked. Booker wastes no time in hammering Angle down and stomping away in the corner. Angle’s right hands don’t work very well so Booker heads outside for a chair. When the referee cuts that off, Booker gets sent into the steps and it’s time for some American stomping back inside.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Booker is right back with the side kick and right hands to the head. Angle manages to pull the trunks to send him shoulder first into the post and there’s the Angle Slam. With Booker down, Angle runs off to the back. Booker follows and the match is a double countout somewhere in there.

Rating: C-. Much like the Eddie match, the wrestling wasn’t the point here as the match was just a means to an end. The Angle/Sharmell stuff is much more creepy than anything else and while I can get the idea behind it, there comes a point where it isn’t a good story anymore as much as it is disturbing. That promo earlier took it to the latter and that’s not a good thing.

In the back, Angle goes into Sharmell’s locker room and shuts the door as screaming is heard. Booker runs in and gets jumped by Angle as Sharmell keeps screaming. Angle: “Come on Booker. You want some? Cause I want your wife!”Angle rams him head first into a locker and leaves as Sharmell screams even more to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a show where the angles were a lot more important than the show and that’s not a bad thing. Most of the stories were good enough with Eddie being outstanding, JBL vs. Cena being quite good and Angle vs. Booker….well Eddie was great. The wrestling didn’t play a big part here but we can do that once we get to the pay per view. Not a good shot, but check out that Eddie stuff as it’s getting to be a major treat.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 5, 2005
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re into the build towards the yet to be named pay per view now, as John Bradshaw Layfield is the new #1 contender to the Smackdown World Title. The more interesting story at the moment though is Eddie Guerrero completely turning on Rey Mysterio last week, which is not likely to go well for either of them. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Eddie promising that he and Rey are fine, only to turn on Rey last week after Rey accidentally knocked him off of the apron during a tag match. Eddie’s emotionless face is great.

Here’s Rey for a chat. Rey has to hand it to Eddie because he’s a heck of a liar. Eddie even had Rey believing that they were family but Rey isn’t going to be his fool anymore. Rey wants to fight right now so here’s Eddie to no music. The fans are all over Eddie, which is all the more impressive given how beloved he was just a few months ago. He has nothing to say to Rey, which isn’t what Mysterio wanted to hear.

Post break Rey demands that Theodore Long give him a match with Eddie. Long says that’s easier said than done so here’s Chavo Guerrero to say Rey will never be a Guerrero. The fight is on and Long screams for security.

Matt Morgan vs. Robbie Eckos

Before the match, Morgan stutters about being unstoppable and promises to make Eckos disappear. A headbutt sends Robbie into the corner and it’s the suplex into the Rock Bottom for the pin in a hurry. Exactly what it should have been after the pre-match promo, which is exactly what it should not have been.

Rey vs. Chavo in a street fight is set for later.

We see the same look at John Cena’s music video that we saw last week.

We look back at JBL becoming #1 contender last week.

Sharmell fires Booker T. up backstage.

Orlando Jordan vs. Booker T.

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Booker hitting him in the face and chest a few times. A clothesline puts Booker on the floor though and a posting makes it even worse. Back in and Booker breaks out of a chinlock in a hurry but gets rolled up for two with Jordan’s feet on the ropes. Booker hits the running forearm and a missile dropkick sets up the side kick. The ax kick finishes Jordan clean.

Rating: D. Normally I would get annoyed at a champion losing clean but Jordan has been presented as nothing more than a punching bag for weeks so it’s hard to get overly annoyed. I have no reason to believe this will lead to Booker going after the title, but it’s not like it has any value since Jordan won the thing.

Sharmell is happy in the back when Kurt Angle comes up. He says Booker should be arrested for grand larceny after last week. Angle wants Booker at Judgment Day and Sharmell needs to be at ringside to hear Booker’s screams as his ankle is broken.

MNM vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Shannon Moore

Non-title and Tazz is already reaching near Jerry Lawler levels of creepy about Melina’s entrance. Mercury takes Scotty into the corner to start but it’s a blind tag from Shannon so Scotty can dance a bit. Everything breaks down for a bit and a double clothesline puts Mercury on the floor. That leaves Nitro to knee Shannon in the head so the champ can take over in the corner.

Nitro and Moore both try crossbodies at the same time and it’s a double knockdown. Mercury knocks Shannon into the corner though and it’s off to Scotty to not much of a reaction. House is cleaned for a bit and most of the Worm is loaded up, only to have Melina get on the apron and show off some leg. The elevated DDT (now dubbed the Snapshot) finishes the distracted Scotty.

Rating: D+. They were doing better than you might have expected for what looked to be a squash on paper. Scotty and Shannon weren’t going to be any threat to beat the new champs here but at least we got a surprising little match out of it. There aren’t any major teams to go after the titles at the moment but at least MNM is rather awesome.

Post match Mysterio runs in with a lead pipe to chase everyone off.

Here’s JBL for a chat even though it was John Cena’s scheduled time. JBL talks about how we need him as champ because no one here would have survived what he’s been through since Wrestlemania. The people have a long history of quitting, whether it be from school or your jobs.

JBL had to go through a bunch of people to get back to the title match and he did it like Moses going through the Red Sea. Now only Cena is left and he is a one hit wonder. Cena is the Buster Douglas of wrestling and after Judgment Day, he will be nothing but a footnote.

Cue a serious Cena with JBL telling him to get his fifteen minutes of fame. Cena agrees that JBL isn’t a quitter but he rides around with a lot of oily men called the Cabinet. He and Michael Cole are “just friends” but he’s not a quitter. Cena isn’t a quitter either, which is why they’re having an I Quit match at Judgment Day. Cena explains the match and promises to make JBL quit before Cena beats him into unconsciousness. This was the fired up Cena and it worked as well as ever.

Chavo is talking to MNM.

Here’s a ticked off Kurt Angle for the Invitational but he’s in no mood for this and throws the jobber out of the ring. Actually he changes his mind and beats the kid up anyway. Angle wants Booker to answer his challenge so here are Booker and Sharmell to answer. The match is on so Angle promises to break his ankle and make Booker go home with that “gutter sl**.”

The beating is on in a hurry and Sharmell even gets in a slap. Actually several of them but Angle gets in a low blow and the Slam. It would seem to be ankle lock time but Angle looks at Sharmell instead. She trips running up the aisle so Angle goes into stalker mode. Cue referees to break it up and Booker chases Angle off. I don’t see this one going well.

Video on the European tour.

Chavo comes in to tell Eddie about how much he admires him. Eddie put friendship and loyalty over anger when Rey slapped him so tonight Chavo will get revenge for the whole family. Eddie still doesn’t say anything.

Hardcore Holly vs. Carlito

Carlito hits one heck of a chop in the corner to start but Holly hits some far weaker ones of his own. The hanging kick to the ribs and a clothesline get two but Carlito knocks him back down. The neck crank doesn’t last long and neither does the ensuing sleeper. Holly gets two off a full nelson slam and tries a suplex but Carlito reverses into a backslide with feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. Carlito continues to be nothing worth seeing in the ring and it’s not like Hardcore Holly is the kind of guy to get a good match out of him. It’s smart to put Carlito in the ring at least a little bit, but he needs the right kind of opponent to make him look good and Holly doesn’t fit that mold.

Post match, Carlito announces the Big Show as his guest on the Cabana next week, where he’ll give Big Show a special offer. Ok then.

Long introduces Cena’s music video for Bad Bad Man, which is very 80s.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Street fight. Mysterio brings the pipe to the ring so Chavo bails. For some reason Rey puts it down, allowing Chavo to dropkick the knee out and take over to start. Rey kicks him into the corner and hits a baseball slide low blow, setting up a split legged moonsault for two. The basement dropkick gets the same and a springboard hurricanrana sends Chavo tot he floor.

Rey’s slingshot dive completely misses though and it’s time for a chair. Chavo takes a bit too long though and gets his leg kicked out so Rey goes up top. That doesn’t work well either as Chavo dropkicks him out of the air and tosses Rey stomach first to the floor. We haven’t gotten very hardcore yet so here’s a ladder to make up for lost time. Rey avoids being launched into the ladder though as he catches himself in the air and moonsaults down onto Chavo in a cool spot.

Back in and Rey headscissors him shoulder first into the post. The chair is opened up and Chavo is fine enough to send Rey face first into the steel. The Gory Bomb gives Chavo two so here’s MNM to hold up the ladder. Rey dropkicks it into their faces but walks into a faceplant for two more. Back up and Rey knocks him into the chair, setting up the springboard seated senton to knock Chavo right back out of the chair for the pin.

Rating: C+. They only played into the street fight stuff a little bit here, though Rey vs. Chavo is almost always a good match. MNM didn’t really need to be out there but they did make things a bit more interesting and it plays into what happened last week and earlier tonight. It’s a good main event, though it’s just part of the much bigger story going on.

Post match the triple teaming is on but here’s Eddie for the save. With MNM and Chavo gone, Eddie stares at Rey….and beats the heck out of him, including sending him head first into the post. He even rips the mask open to show the busted forehead. A suplex onto the steps leaves Rey laying as the fans are scared to end the show. This was really effective with Eddie looking completely evil and teasing the fans with Eddie making the save before stabbing Rey in the back again.

Overall Rating: B-. The big stories were all on fire here with Eddie vs. Rey being a big standout and Cena vs. JBL having a logical next step. Angle vs. Booker could go a variety of ways but what we got so far seemed that we might be in for some rather uncomfortable moments. Some of the bad stuff on here went by rather quickly and the additional Eddie vs. Rey stuff more than made up for it. Good show, though there are still areas they need to fix.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 28, 2005
Location: NEC Arena, Birmingham, England
Attendance: 9,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re still over in England and this time around we’ll be seeing a four way elimination match to determine the first challenger for John Cena’s Smackdown World Title. There is a good chance that match is going to be getting a lot of the TV time, though I’m hoping we get some time on Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Carlito to open things up with Carlito’s Cabana. Carlito goes over some British food stereotypes and wants to spit apple in the Queen’s face. See, England is NOT cool because they have not yet discovered cool. We get a picture of Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip, who must not be cool.

That brings him to his guest: Kurt Angle, who immediately agrees with Carlito’s take on England. There really is nothing cool around here, like making Shawn Michaels tap at Wrestlemania or beating Eddie Guerrero a few weeks ago. That’s cool, but what is REALLY cool is winning the four way tonight and going on to become a five time WWE Champion. This brings out a rather muscular British wrestler to interrupt and Angle isn’t happy.

The guy introduces himself as Steve Lewington, who wants to take part in the Kurt Angle Invitational. That isn’t happening, but Angle throws in a bad British accent to say no in a better way. Angle sends him away and jumps him from behind, which is the American way. He promises to become #1 contender tonight….and Lewington jumps him from behind. A low blow cuts Lewington off though and the Angle Slam/ankle lock make it even worse. Carlito adds an apple spit. This felt like filler, which can be a problem on the British shows.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Paul London

London is defending and Torrie Wilson is guest ring announcer for obvious reasons. London’s head was stapled together a few weeks ago so Chavo sends him face first into the buckle in a smart move. A few more shots to the head don’t do much good so London hits a rolling kick to the face, followed by a dropsault for two. London goes up top but gets shoved off, sending him ribs first into the turnbuckle and out to the floor. That’s quite the crash and it’s enough for the countout.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere but it should set up a rematch for the title down the line. Chavo has a reasonable complaint about losing the title in a battle royal so giving him a few matches against London is a good idea. What might not be a good idea is having your champion lose like this when he isn’t the most established star in the first place.

Post match Chavo celebrates with the title but Torrie says she has been informed that a championship cannot change hands on a countout. Is there reason to believe that she knew that before he told him? Chavo lets out some frustrations with a Gory Bomb.

We recap the issues between Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero, which included them losing the Tag Team Titles last week.

The Daily Star Girls are here….and that’s it.

Sharmell is firing Booker T. up when Heidenreich shows up. Booker gets in his face….but Heidenreich just wants to read a poem about the four way. Sharmell can dig the poem, which has Booker winning. Heidenreich is happy because he made two friends tonight. They really still see potential in this poetry gimmick?

Eddie comes in to see Rey to try and bury the hatchet. As Eddie talks about being a bad partner lately, Chavo comes in to say he’s going to win the Cruiserweight Title soon. If the two of them play their cards right, they could be champions again. Eddie doesn’t like this line of thinking and says everyone is just like Chavo: jealous of the relationship Eddie and Rey have. He and Rey are family, but Chavo doesn’t buy that because Rey is no Guerrero.

Eddie says Rey has been more of a brother than his own blood and is there for him every time. Eddie asks if Rey is his family and Rey cuts off Chavo for interfering. Chavo isn’t part of this and needs to leave. Chavo leaves and Rey agrees that they are great friends and partners. Yeah Eddie may not be all there mentally sometimes but that’s the case with everyone. His heart is in it though and that’s what counts now and forever. It’s time to go win some titles. Awesome stuff here, as has been the case with almost everything Eddie and Rey have been doing.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio

Eddie and Rey are challenging. It’s Nitro in trouble early as both Eddie and Rey get in a few shots to the face. Nitro sends Eddie to the apron, allowing Mercury to pull him down to the floor and then post him for a bonus. As the fans whistle at Melina, the champs start keeping Guerrero down in the corner like a good team should. Eddie gets up without much trouble and drives over for the tag to Rey, who springboards in as only he can. He also accidentally runs into Eddie as only he can, though a springboard moonsault is still good enough for two on Mercury.

A hurricanrana looks to set up the 619 on Mercury as Eddie is walking out. One heck of a powerbomb plants Mysterio as Eddie is watching on the Titantron. Eddie eventually comes back and gets on the apron as we take a break. Back with Rey in trouble, including Nitro’s breakdancing legdrop connecting for two.

We hit the waistlock as Eddie is looking annoyed on the apron. Nitro switches to a reverse chinlock until Rey kicks him off, only to have Eddie look like he’s sitting through a seminar on proper handwashing technique. Eddie won’t reach his hand out when Rey gets over so Mercury pulls him away and drops an elbow to the back. The assisted elevated DDT plants Rey to retain the titles.

Rating: C. This worked very well from a storytelling perspective though not so much from a wrestling perspective. That wasn’t the point here though and the big angle was quite good as an enhanced version of how Strike Force split back at Wrestlemania V. It was very well done and it’s likely to keep being awesome.

Post match MNM destroys Rey and posts him as Eddie just stands there watching from the apron. He slowly walks away as Rey screams for him to come back in one of the best moments they’ve done in a long time.

Post break we recap the whole thing, which isn’t as effective with Cole calling every step of it.

John Cena vs. Rene Dupree

Non-title. Before Cena comes out, Rene talks about being a REAL European athlete because he’s from France. Dupree starts fast and even gets in a spinebuster for some right hands. We hit the reverse chinlock again before a kick to the back sets up a second version. Cena finally realizes how boring this is and finishes with the usual in a hurry.

Rating: D. This was rather boring despite barely breaking three minutes. Cena vs. Dupree has been done so many times and it isn’t made better by the fact that Dupree has never felt like a threat to him. I had almost forgotten that Dupree was even a thing at this point and that might be better for everyone.

Matt Morgan vs. Mikey Whiplash

Whiplash would go on to become a name in British wrestling. Morgan gets to stutter about how he stutters. Who in the world looked at someone like Morgan and thought STUTTERING was the right way to go? Morgan blasts him in the face for what he thought was laughter and generally mauls him for a bit before finishing with the suplex into the hard Rock Bottom for the pin in a hurry.

JBL, still with the classic title belt, says it doesn’t matter where we are, because the fans still want to chant his name. Big Show comes in to say JBL says the same thing every week. No matter what he says, JBL is on a losing streak (no he isn’t) and tonight it’s going to continue (no it isn’t).

We go behind the scenes of John Cena’s music video (for Bad Bad Man with all of it’s 80s greatness), complete with Christina Aguliera showing up and sounding rather uninterested. The video premieres next week.

Booker T. vs. Big Show vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Kurt Angle

Elimination rules for the #1 contendership and Orlando Jordan is here with JBL. Angle already has the straps down so you know this is serious. The brawl is on in a hurry to start with Show cleaning house, even knocking away a German suplex attempt. A legdrop crushes JBL and sends Booker flying off a toss. Show crushes all three of them in the corner but Angle pops out with an Angle Slam for one.

Booker adds the ax kick for two and the Clothesline From JBL gets the same. They knock Show outside for the huge Angle Slam through the table….and a countout for the elimination. In a four way? That’s a creative way to get rid of him, even if it goes against the general rules of the match. We take a break and come back with Booker fighting out of the corner but crotching himself off a missed sidekick.

A whip into the steps slows JBL down and Angle suplexes Booker for two. JBL comes back in and walks into a Book End for two but Angle is right back with the rolling German suplexes for the same on Booker. Neither the Angle Slam or the Book End can connect so Angle picks the ankle. That’s broken up as well so Angle hits the Slam for two more. Booker’s superkick gets his own near fall as Jordan slides in a chair. That earns him an ejection and the distraction lets Angle chair Booker in the head for the second elimination to get us down to one on one.

We take another break and come back with JBL slightly cut open and Angle fighting out of a chinlock. The ankle lock goes on but gets broken up just as quickly and there’s the fall away slam. The Clothesline hits the referee though, just as Angle gets the ankle lock. JBL calls out the Bashams for the save so it’s a bunch of suplexes all around. That includes some rolling German suplexes to JBL and the ankle lock gets the tap, which no one sees. Cue Booker to chair Angle down, allowing JBL to steal the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Booker vs. Angle made this work rather well, even when the ending was as obvious as you could have gotten. They have made no secret about the fact that this was JBL’s win the entire way and that’s fine. It makes the most sense and you can have the other three get title shots later on if they want to. Not a great match, but it got around the clear finish and that’s kind of hard to do.

JBL does You Can’t See Me to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a story heavy show and that gave it a way around some of the lame wrestling. The shows over in England are often a bit off wrestling wise (probably due to the travel issues) so going with some big angle advancement was the right call. It’s a good show and now we can start the build towards whatever their next pay per view is going to be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 21, 2005
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,258
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

The search for a #1 contender continues with Booker T. vs. Big Show for the final spot in the #1 contenders triple threat match. The other, and likely more interesting, story is the issues between Eddie Guerrero and Rey Mysterio, who are still the reigning Smackdown Tag Team Champions. For now at least. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

WWE Championship Series: Big Show vs. Booker T.

JBL, with the now former version of the WWE Title, is on commentary. Booker’s wife Sharmell is in the front row. Hold on though as here’s Kurt Angle, which doesn’t sit well with JBL. Kurt stares at JBL and then joins commentary as well. Booker’s waistlock doesn’t get him anywhere as JBL goes on one of his great rants about how unfair this whole thing is. Angle mentions being a four time WWE Champion, with Cole bringing up the gold medal. Angle: “That too.” Some shots to the knees have Show down but he uses the good leg to kick away in the corner.

The standing legdrop gives Show two as Angle comes to the realization that he would face JBL one on one if no one wins here. Oh here we go. As JBL yells about Angle being bald, Show cuts off the comeback with a superkick. The big boot misses though and Show crotches himself on the ropes. The Book End gets two and a Cactus Clothesline puts both of them on the floor. That’s enough for Angle and JBL to get up and beat them both down for the double DQ.

Rating: D+. This was all about the story instead of the match itself, a lot of which was missed for the sake of showing commentary. You can see the four way coming from here because heels never learn in WWE but at least the commentary was entertaining until we got to the finish. Show is already back to where he was before his comeback though and that’s a bit sad to see.

Post match Show and Booker clear the ring and here’s Theodore Long to say not so fast. As expected, next week will now be a four way #1 contenders match, because this company can’t even go through three matches without changing the format of a series it created. As for tonight, tag match playa, holla holla holla!

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana, with the fans behind Carlito in a bit of a surprise. We’re in New York City and that’s not cool. He has no problem with spitting part of the Big Apple in their faces because he doesn’t like it here. Earlier today, he was walking the streets and saw hundreds of kids with no chance of growing up to be cool. New Yorkers are known for losing their cool, which brings him to his guest tonight, who is the opposite of cool: Eddie Guerrero.

The fans are VERY behind Eddie here as Carlito brings up Eddie’s absence last week when MNM laid Rey Mysterio out. We see a clip, but Eddie threatens to do some violent things to Carlito if he says cool again. Eddie would like Rey to come out here right now for a chat so here he is. A lot has changed in the last year with Eddie going from holding up the WWE Championship in this building a year ago and now….this. Eddie has become clouded and selfish and it cost Rey a shot at the WWE Championship.

Instead of focusing on what he doesn’t have, Eddie is focusing on what he does have: his health, and his family, like Rey. They shake hands but here are MNM on the screen. Melina wastes no time in issuing the challenge but Eddie wants them to say it face to face. They say they’re happier back here, and step aside to reveal Eddie’s low rider. Spray painting ensues and Eddie rants in Spanish.

During the break, Eddie and Rey went to the car and the title match is on for tonight.

The returning Matt Morgan, now with a stutter, says he isn’t nervous because he commands attention. And that would be it for Morgan’s chances at going anywhere in WWE.

Orlando Jordan tells the Bashams, who are about three feet from him, to get over here right now. He wants them to help him beat up John Cena tonight to soften him up for JBL. Jordan leaves and Danny says he’s getting sick of this.

Matt Morgan vs. Brett Matthews

Morgan thinks Matthews is laughing at him so the destruction is on in a hurry, including a big boot. A side slam sets up a suplex into a Rock Bottom (later named the Hellevator/Nightmare Pendulum) gives Morgan the pin in a hurry. Matthews would later change his name to something that stuck a little better: Zack Ryder.

John Bradshaw Layfield/Kurt Angle vs. Booker T./Big Show

Booker and JBL stare at each other to start but Show comes in before anything happens. That means the big overhand chop and a headbutt as Show does his usual slow paced offense which looks effective enough. With JBL knocked down and out to the floor, it’s off to Angle, whose headlock is carried into the corner. Booker comes in for a headlock and cleans house without much effort. The side kick takes too long though and it’s time to roll some German suplexes.

Angle low bridges him to the floor and it’s Booker in trouble for a change. A whip into the corner sets up a waistlock with a grapevine to keep Booker down and Angle gets some near falls. JBL holds Booker down for some Angle stomping and a belly to belly makes it even worse. The rib work continues with a bodyscissors but Booker gets up and grabs a DDT. The hot tag brings in Show to clean house and run everyone over but the Angle Slam cuts him off. Show is back up and grabs a chokeslam on JBL as Angle walks out on the match. The ax kick and the chokeslam finish JBL.

Rating: D+. Totally standard main event tag match here with Angle showing some intelligence because this means nothing in the long term. They aren’t hiding the obvious ending to next week’s match and that’s acceptable enough here, though JBL vs. Cena again isn’t the most thrilling prospect in the world.

Here’s Heidenreich for a chat. He’s been here for a few days now and has even made a few friends. He would like to bring out one of those friends right now, so here is the Brooklyn Brawler (who has theme music). Heidenreich reads a poem about him, which basically says the Brawler is here. The Brawler isn’t impressed and says that was embarrassing.

The only more embarrassing thing was when the Yankees choked against the Red Sox last year in the playoffs. That was so embarrassing that Brawler takes off his shirt to reveal a Red Sox shirt. Now, he is the BOSTON BRAWLER, earning himself a beating from Heidenreich. I remember the Brawler doing this and it very well might be more memorable than anything Heidenreich did in his career.

We look back at MNM ruining the low rider.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Rey Mysterio/Eddie Guerrero

MNM is challenging and we get the very cool paparazzi entrance (another one which was incredible in OVW, especially with Superstar as their theme song). The brawl is on before the bell with Eddie backdropping Nitro to get things going. Mercury is sent outside as well, with Cole declaring it a tag team clinic about thirty seconds in. Back from a break with Rey dropkicking Nitro down and Eddie nailing the slingshot hilo.

A Nitro distraction lets Mercury knock Eddie off the apron though and the champs are in trouble for the first time. Mercury grabs an abdominal stretch, which is broken up in a hurry for the hot tag off to Rey. That’s fine with Nitro, who fireman’s carries him into a gutbuster from Mercury to take over again. Eddie comes back in anyway as everything breaks down. Rey loads up the 619 but Melina distracts Eddie, allowing MNM to hit their elevated DDT for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. I’ve always liked MNM and this is a good way to start them off in a hurry. It’s not a great match or anything but they advanced the Eddie vs. Rey story and made some new stars in the tag division at the same time. That’s a rather nice use of ten minutes and a much better debut than the Heart Throbs had on Raw.

Post match Eddie shoves Rey down and goes to leave but Rey shoves him down on the floor and leaves by himself.

Raw Rebound. I wouldn’t remind people of that show.

MNM has a photo shoot by their limo and Melina is very pleased.

John Cena vs. Orlando Jordan

Non-title. Before the match, Cena, in a Babe Ruth Yankees jersey, says he’s hearing the sounds of New York and lists off some boroughs to make the crowd happy. Cena talks about how New York is built on tradition and that makes it special. New York knows how to adapt and overcome, which he will do here. Dude it’s Orlando Jordan. You could win this match without taking the jersey off. Jordan only has one Basham here and that isn’t going to end well.

Jordan gets in an early shoulder but gets punched in the corner. Doug Basham offers a distraction so Jordan can hit a DDT, which is probably about it for his big time offense. Cena comes back but gets sent shoulder first into the post so Jordan can hammer away. The bearhug is broken up with a shot to the head and a suplex puts both of them down. Back up and some clotheslines have Jordan in trouble as Cena initiates his finishing sequence. Doug has to take an FU and as the referee gets rid of him, cue Danny to belt Cena in the head. Jordan’s top rope elbow gets two and, after dropping Danny, Cena finishes with the FU.

Rating: D. What were you expecting here? Jordan isn’t interesting and isn’t worth watching but he’s here almost every single week and we have to watch him have one bad match after another. There was no way that Cena was losing here and it was a matter of time until Cena beat him. They didn’t spend too much time on it, but any time spent watching Jordan feels like an eternity.

Overall Rating: D+. The wrestling was not good here but the storytelling made up for a lot of it and that’s what matters more. The Eddie vs. Rey stuff is a very good story and I’m digging how they’ve made one logical step after another. That is the case with JBL vs. Cena as well, though that one isn’t as interesting. It wasn’t a great show here, but they’re setting things up and you can see where it’s going.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 14, 2005
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re in the process of finding a new #1 contender, which is likely to be JBL. Thankfully we get some big matches on the way there, including one tonight with Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero. That is one of those matches that can’t be screwed up so we should be in for a good evening. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the #1 contender series, with Eddie Guerrero costing Rey Mysterio his match against JBL.

Opening sequence.

Orlando Jordan vs. Booker T.

Non-title with JBL on commentary. Speaking of JBL, he offers an early distraction so Jordan can get in a cheap shot to take over. Jordan stops to pose like the schnook that he is and Booker kicks him in the face, only to have the Bashams run in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on but Big Show runs (faster than I’ve seen him move in years) in for the save. Theodore Long, handicap match.

Orlando Jordan/Basham Brothers vs. Big Show/Booker T.

Show pulls Danny over the ropes to start but Doug breaks up a chokeslam attempt to Jordan. Booker beats up the Bashams and Show spears Danny on the floor. The Spinarooni sets up the ax kick and Doug is done in a hurry.

Post match we’re told Big Show faces Booker next week in the #1 contender series, which makes sense given Show’s current nice guy status. As a bonus, JBL yells at the rest of the Cabinet.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Fallout from last week’s bikini contest. Dawn kicks her in the ribs to start and sends her face first into the mat. They go to a pinfall reversal sequence of all things until Dawn hits an X Factor for two. Torrie gets two off a rollup before finishing with the swinging neckbreaker.

Video on the Australia tour.

It’s time for the debut of Carlito’s Cabana, complete with a hammock and coconut drinks. And a basket of apples for the health conscious guest, though if you disrespect him, he will spit on you. Carlito mocks the Cubs as lovable losers, just like his first guest: Rey Mysterio. We look back at Eddie Guerrero costing Rey his match against JBL last week, ending his chances at becoming #1 contender.

Rey admits that he’s mad at Eddie and hasn’t talked to him in a week but they’re family. He’ll be WWE Champion one day though, which Carlito doesn’t buy. It’s clear that Eddie is jealous of him and things are about to get a lot worse. Cue the debuting MNM, with Carlito’s eyes bugging out over Melina’s entrance (fair enough). Carlito dubs them cool and Melina handles the introductions.

They could be Tag Team Champions since Latino Heat and Mucha Lucha aren’t getting along. That’s a challenge so Rey makes fun of Melina’s breath. The beatdown is on and it’s an elevated DDT to plant Rey as the EDDIE chants don’t get him any help. Carlito sits in his lounge chair and seems impressed with the whole thing. This was a heck of a debut as you instantly get the idea of the team with the paparazzi style entrance and their overall appeal. They were outstanding down in OVW and the whole idea works even better on the main roster. Very good stuff here.

Post match JBL yells at the Cabinet some more, blaming them for costing him the World Title. A deliveryman brings in a box, which is addressed to John Cena. JBL pays him off and gets the box instead.

Rey is on the trainer’s table when an irate Eddie comes in to say he’ll deal with MNM. Rey says just leave him alone because he wasn’t there when Rey needed him. Eddie claims car trouble but Rey isn’t convinced and yells about last week. Things calm down a bit with Eddie dedicating his match against Kurt Angle tonight to Rey.

Here’s John Cena, sans title belt, for a WWE Championship presentation. Cena talks about how Chicago does it big, because they’re hosting Wrestlemania XXII next year. That brings him to the title, which everyone is chasing. Cena has made a new title belt but since JBL stole it, he can bring it out here right now. Either that or Cena can come get it.

Cue JBL, who orders some goons to bring out a trashcan and a box. JBL takes off his jacket to reveal the current title, which still has Cena’s name on it. Cena: “Looks like you made a habit out of stealing my stuff.” JBL goes on a rant about Cena ruining tradition and promises to destroy what Cena has planned for tonight. Cena says hang on as JBL opens the box and reaches in to find….guts from a slaughterhouse.

JBL is disgusted so Cena goes up and pours the whole box onto his white shirt. As I try to get my head around how lucky it is that JBL just happened to be there to intercept the box from the delivery man, Cena gets back in the ring and has the new title lowered. And yes, it’s the spinner title as we enter the dark ages.

Heidenreich vs. ???

Tazz gets his history wrong by saying that we’ve never had a poet in WWE before, meaning Michael Cole has to serve as historian. What does it say when Cole is outsmarting you? The unnamed guy hammers away in the corner but gets kicked in the face as Heidenreich talks about wanting to be friends. A corner clothesline sets up more shouting and it’s a sitout Boss Man Slam to give Heidenreich the pin.

Post match, with the jobber in the corner, Heidenreich reads a poem about….breaking wind because we’re in the Windy City. It is exactly what you would expect. That’s a Vince promo if I’ve ever heard one.

Booker and Sharmell are fired up for next week but Booker has to stop for a photo shoot. Kurt Angle comes up to say it doesn’t matter who wins next week because Angle is on a roll. Sharmell calms things down so Angle accuses Booker of needing a woman to fight his battles. Sharmell: “Oh no you didn’t.” She brings up Eddie beating Angle last year at Wrestlemania and does Booker’s catchphrase. Sharmell can actually talk outside of hailing King Booker.

Here’s Paul London with a bandage around his head after last week’s bloody match. We see part of last week’s beatdown at the hands of Billy Kidman and Chavo Guerrero before London talks about needing eighteen staples in his head. He can’t wrestle tonight so he’s here for a fight, meaning it’s time to call out Chavo.

Cue Chavo, who claims that London stole the Cruiserweight Title in the first place. London has never beaten him because he is the greatest of all time. Chavo is coming for the title as soon as London is cleared. An honorable man like Chavo would never fight an injured man, so here’s Kidman from behind to jump London. The champ fights him off and hits a DDT to set up the 450.

Raw Rebound.

We recap the #1 contender series. All one match of it.

WWE Championship Series: Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Feeling out process to start with Eddie taking him down by the arm. Angle reverses into a wristlock, with Eddie reversing into one of his own. That’s not working for Angle, who stacks Eddie up for two and a standoff. Eddie gets smart by picking up the pace and dropkicks Angle to the floor as they are taking their time here. Back in and a headlock takeover works a bit better for Angle but Eddie reverses into another armbar.

Eddie switches things up with Three very fast Amigos but has to roll through the frog splash as we take a break. Back with Angle uppercutting away and hitting the first belly to belly to work on the ribs. The Angle Slam is countered into a hurricanrana as they’re getting into their standard story here of Angle being laser focused with his natural skills and Eddie being creative and adapting as the match goes on. It’s very Bret vs. Shawn and they’re talented enough to make it work.

The ref gets bumped so Eddie goes outside and puts a chair near the announcers’ table before dropping down on the mat. It’s not quite enough for the DQ so Angle snaps off a German suplex. A backbreaker gives Angle some near falls and we hit the bodyscissors. Eddie gets creative by elbowing the leg for the break, earning himself another hard German suplex. With nothing else working, Angle tries a super Angle Slam, which gets elbowed away. The frog splash hits knees though and we take another break.

Back with Angle grabbing the waistlock again before the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for the double knockdown. Angle is up first and the Slam gets two to put them both down again. It’s time to roll some German suplexes for two more but Eddie hits Three more Amigos. The frog splash gets two and a small package is good for the same as Angle has to pull his singlet back up. He’s made enough to pick the ankle but Eddie rolls it away for the ref bump.

Angle grabs the chair from earlier, which draws out Rey to take it away. Eddie sees Rey holding the chair and thinks he’s going to hit him, allowing Angle to ram Rey into Eddie, knocking him silly with the chair. The referee comes back in so Angle can pin Eddie and advance.

Rating: B+. Were you expecting anything less from Angle vs. Eddie for 25 minutes? Actually you might have been as these two can put on some masterpieces. This one was just very good with some storyline advancement tied into the rather awesome match. The storytelling was there and the wedge between Eddie and Rey is furthered. That’s one of the better TV matches you’ll see in a long time and it flew by, which is always a bonus.

Eddie yells at Rey to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It takes a lot to knock a show with this kind of a main event down this far but the rest of the night was terrible. You had a bunch of nothing matches, Heidenreich’s juvenile promo and the debut of the spinner belt. What else was positive on here other than the main event and MNM’s debut? Sharmell yelling at Angle maybe? Excellent main event but egads the rest of the show is awful.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 7, 2005
Location: iPayOne Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the first show after Wrestlemania and that means things are going to be resetting just a bit. John Cena won the Smackdown World Title and that means things should feel a little more energized around here. I’m not sure what to expect, but hopefully it’s a better structured show than Raw. Let’s get to it.

Here are Sunday’s results it you need a recap.

This one is rated TV-MA, which should make it a bit more interesting.

Here’s JBL to get things going, because we’re doing the same thing Raw did. Cole says that JBL’s title reign lasted 244 days, which isn’t really close to the 280 that it actually was. That’s quite the error but we’ll move on to JBL ranting about how awesome he is/was while John Cena left the arena in handcuffs last week. Cena is not in his league and maybe JBL should just go back to his great life in New York City. He isn’t riding into the sunset though because he wants his rematch.

JBL quotes the Jack Nicholson court room speech from A Few Good Men but here’s Eddie Guerrero to cut him off. Eddie didn’t like hearing JBL say the people need him as champion because they only thing they need is for him to shut up. If JBL wants the title back, he’ll have to go through Eddie because he deserves it. Cue Booker T. to say they can go to the back of the line but it’s Big Show cutting them all off. The fans chant for Eddie as Big Show threatens to shove JBL’s hat somewhere.

Now it’s Rey Mysterio joining the fray and Eddie isn’t looking happy. JBL to Rey: “Try it in English.” Rey says he should get the shot because we’re in the 619 but here’s Kurt Angle to say Eddie, Big Show and JBL all lost at Wrestlemania. Booker wasn’t even on Wrestlemania! As for Rey, you can’t challenge for the title without being an adult. Angle was very busy on Sunday because he got arrested for armed robbery. He stole the show and everyone saw it and the police had to do something.

JBL tells everyone to get out of the ring but here’s Theodore Long to say JBL doesn’t have a rematch clause in his Wrestlemania contract. They all have a case and they’ll have a chance to prove it in a series of matches to determine the new #1 contender, though the word tournament isn’t mentioned. We’ll start with JBL vs. Mysterio. I’m not sure if you can call it a tournament, but that’s the same thing we just got to set up Wrestlemania.

There is a bikini contest tonight, which I really hope isn’t what makes this TV-MA.

Cruiserweight Title: Paul London vs. Billy Kidman

London is defending and Chavo Guerrero is on commentary, talking about the twenty five men who eliminated him from the battle royal last week. On a related note: I love the way Charles Robinson flips the belt up to hold it over his head. It’s a nice touch. London grabs an early armdrag but gets thrown into the corner for his efforts. A heck of an Irish whip into the corner has London in more trouble and some knees to the face make it even worse. London tries to fight up but gets sent hard into the buckle and down to the floor in a crash that looked pretty bad.

Back in and London is busted open with the blood gushing as London starts his comeback. A hurricanrana gives London two but Kidman’s dropkick is good for the same. We pause so Robinson can ask if London wants to continue and the distraction lets Kidman hit the BK Bomb. Kidman grabs a fireman’s carry but London rolls through into a small package for the pin.

Rating: C. The blood was quite the addition (as well as the TV-MA explanation) and it felt

like the match ended in a hurry as a result. London is an easy guy to like and putting him against Chavo should give us some good matches. It’s better than having the cruiserweights barely ever show up and there is never a problem with some faster paced matches.

Post match Kidman and Chavo beat London down.

Long Wrestlemania recap.

Luther Reigns mocks Big Show’s sumo gear and some humor challenged wrestlers find this HILARIOUS. Show pops up and says let’s do this right now.

Big Show vs. Luther Reigns

Show chops him to the floor to start so Reigns tries to power him into the corner. That earns him some sumo strikes back across the ring and Show knocks him outside again. A big boot and corner splash set up the chokeslam to finish Reigns. That would be Reigns’ last match on Smackdown and he’s little more than a small footnote in wrestling history. He had a great look but couldn’t do anything in the ring or anything significant on the mic, so he went nowhere.

Here’s John Cena for his first comments as champ and the fans seem happy to see him. Cena talks about JBL being the longest reigning champion in a decade and all the things that he accomplished with the title. After all that though, the champ is here. He’s been told that he isn’t a superstar and doesn’t respect the business or its championships. Apparently traditionalists got offended when he modified the US Title, so take a look at the coveted WWE Title.

Cena goes outside and climbs into the crowd, saying that it doesn’t matter who it is coming at him: Booker T., Eddie Guerrero, JBL, the Brooklyn Brawler, Iron Mike Sharp or Steve Gatorwolf. You want some, come get some. The celebration is on in the crowd and it does feel like a big deal and a new era.

Post break and the celebration is still on.

Here’s Kurt Angle for the Gold Medal Invitational. Before we get to that though, he talks about Cena’s days being numbered because next week he’s facing Eddie Guerrero in the #1 contender series.

Kurt Angle vs. Jose Quesada

Angle asks if Jose’s family is here and jumps him as he goes to point. German suplex, Angle Slam and ankle lock finish Jose at 36 seconds.

Post match Angle puts on the ankle lock again and makes Jose scream as a preview for Eddie.

Carlito didn’t like Piper’s Pit so next week it’s Carlito’s Cabana. Anyone cool is invited, and the interviewer thinks he might qualify. The apple is loaded up so he backs off immediately.

Rey Mysterio is ready when Eddie comes in to give him a pep talk. Mysterio isn’t wild on the idea of Eddie being out there with him after what happened last week. Besides, he can beat anyone on any given night, just like he did to Eddie on Sunday. Eddie doesn’t look happy.

Michael Cole is in the ring to host a bikini contest to plug the Viva Las Divas magazine and DVD. We have Miss Jackie, Dawn Marie and Torrie Wilson but Michelle McCool, Joy Giovanni and Lauren Jones interrupt. They should be included too so they disrobe as well and, of course, Torrie wins because she always does. This was a way to fill in time with good looking women so it worked on that front.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Rey Mysterio

Orlando Jordan is here with JBL and we finally get the rules of the series: there are three singles matches and the winners go to a triple threat match in the UK for the title shot at a date to be announced. Better than a standard tournament. Rey moves around to start and bails to the floor, eventually suckering JBL in for a dropkick.

That’s shrugged off though and JBL forearms him in the back as the fans stay behind Rey. A shot to the face knocks Mysterio down again but he’s fine enough to snap JBL’s throat across the top. Rey’s hurricanrana puts JBL on the floor and a baseball slide puts Jordan on the floor. Back from a break with Rey holding a sleeper until JBL flips him forward for the counter. JBL starts working on the ribs and back with a suplex getting two.

A straight right hand puts Rey down again and a super fall away slam is good for two more. JBL kicks him in the face for daring to try a comeback and the expected bearhug goes on. Rey bites at the face to escape so JBL plants him with a spinebuster for two instead. The belly to back superplex is countered though and Rey hits a top rope moonsault press for his own near fall.

That means the pace can pick up, including a DDT to plant JBL. Jordan breaks up the 619 though, which draws out Eddie to deal with him. Eddie hammers away on Jordan so JBL kicks him in the back for the save. Now the 619 hits JBL, with the announcers declaring that he is gonna do it. The West Coast Pop looks to finish but Eddie comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was getting good by the end and then they went to the logical ending. It’s fine to have Mysterio lose here because of Eddie as their issues can continue while also getting us closer to the logical JBL rematch. JBL knows how to put on a power display like this though and the match was entertaining as a result.

Post match the Bashams run in to go after Eddie and Rey but Cena makes the save. JBL points at him to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this one better than Raw, even though Raw had better wrestling throughout the night. This show felt like it had more filler but it also felt like it was a show that kept things rolling rather than taking most of the night off. We have a series of challengers for the title (though the end result isn’t much of a secret) and actual comments from the new champ rather than seeing him getting beaten up for a few minutes in a lame match. It wasn’t a great show but it made me want to see where some things were going and that’s what you want from a show like this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6