Smackdown
Date: September 13, 2001
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 12,046
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

 

This is the post 9/11 Smackdown, which was the first major gathering to occur after the September 11^th attacks. Obviously due to that this is another show where the wrestling means nothing at all which is definitely the best thing they could have done. I saw this when it aired and haven’t seen it since. Let’s get to it.

 

Surprisingly enough we get the WWE opening which today would be the montage thing. This is live for once on a Thursday.

 

Loud USA chant to start and then we actually do the theme song. This is pre-Brand Split and in the Alliance period.

 

The roster is out in the aisle with Rock being out front. There’s a very different dynamic here than there is at other tribute shows.

 

Lillian sings the Star Spangled Banner with the red, white and blue ropes out like the old days. I guess Vince was really patriotic back in the day or something.

 

Don’t expect a lot of jokes here or incredibly serious grading here as this isn’t a regular show/review.

 

Edge talks about how he wasn’t going to do one of these interviews because he didn’t think the fans cared what Edge or Adam Copeland said about this. This is about entertaining the people tonight though as is their job. There’s definitely a pride here and the mood is far more upbeat.

 

Ricky Santana, an agent, says that he’s mad but he isn’t going to hide in fear.

 

Hardy Boys vs. Lance Storm/Hurricane

 

WWF vs. Alliance here. At least we can look at Lita. Hurricane has some weird almost funk music here and is European Champion. Heyman’s intro of Hurricane always cracked me up. “Able to leap tall cruiserweights in a single bound, more powerful than a local luchador, look, up on the stage, it’s a bird, it’s a plane, IT’S THE HURRICANE!” Hilarious. Matt vs. Hurricane to start us off which was the feud at this point.

 

Matt takes him down early and strikes Hurricane’s pose. The Hardys send the evil ones into each other and Matt gets a rollup for two. Fast paced stuff to start and I can’t keep up with it. Double team on Matt and we get a Lita chant. Hurricane is tagged in and puts the cape on. Cross body hits Matt for two. Matt grabs a Russian Leg Sweep and it’s off to Storm and Jeff.

 

Poetry in Motion to Hurricane but the one to Storm misses. Twist of Fate is blocked by a superkick by Hurricane which gets two. Jeff takes Hurricane down on the floor with a rana. Back inside the Twist and the Swanton take care of Storm to end this. Quick match and too short to rate, but fun for an opener.

 

Terri talks about thinking of this from a mother’s perspective and how so many people lost family members in this.

 

Rock says he can’t comprehend what the families are going through with this. He doesn’t seem sure of what to say which is totally understandable.

 

A local businessman says exactly what you would expect him to say.

 

Rob Van Dam vs. Spike Dudley

 

RVD is Hardcore Champion but this is non title. Molly Holly is with Spike and is very cute. After we hear about the Red Cross accepting donations, Spike goes right at RVD. Paul talks about how these two had wars in ECW. I don’t remember those at all but that’s just me. This is hardcore mind you.

 

Van Dam gets his spinning leg drop across the apron for two. RVD brings in a chair but Spike gets a victory roll for two. In an impressive move, RVD misses a moonsault but catches the chair and dropkicks it into the head of Spike. Paul praises him, which makes me wonder why he never put the ECW Title on him. Five Star ends this with ease in very short time so no rating.

 

Jericho says he’d rather be in New York doing whatever he could to help. We don’t know what’s coming in the next five minutes or ten minutes and tonight maybe we should be a bit kinder or more gentle. It was weird hearing Jericho be this serious but he was rather articulate and well thought out.

 

Stasiak says this will make us stronger. Very short and sweet.

 

Lita says she’s numb to this still and she has a lot of emotions because of this. She isn’t sure what to do and wouldn’t say she was. She says everyone should stop and take a deep breath which is what this show is for. Makes sense.

 

Chris Jericho vs. Christian

 

I’m reviewing this match on two shows at the moment. Kind of ironic I guess for no apparent reason. We do get the old CHRISTIAN! AT LAST YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN entrance which is always cool. Oh and he has the stupid glasses here which is always a cool perk. Edge is IC Champion and the feud is kind of going on at this point with the brothers (now not brothers).

 

Christian talks for a bit but is cut off by Jericho. Jericho makes fun of the ring entrance including a falsetto version of theme song with a little parody thrown in. For a bit there I forgot the point of this show, which I think is exactly the idea. Jericho comes straight at him and the fight is on. Attempt at the Walls starts almost 15 seconds in but Christian sends him into the post very quickly.

 

A single arm DDT by Christian gets two. I think Christian is in the Alliance here but I’m not sure. There’s an Alliance referee in there so that should sum things up pretty clearly. Jericho gets a shot in and here he comes (TO SAVE THE DAY! SAVE THE DAY!). Enziguri sets up the bulldog but the Lionsault gets knees. And never mind as Christian yells and gets rolled up for the pin. Another fast match that is too short to grade. Decent while it lasted though.

 

Kanyon says he’s proud of New York and his family who are cops in New York for coming together for this.

 

Taz says he’s scared because his family is in New York. He seemed to get cut off here almost.

 

Torrie says nothing of note.

 

Hurricane says this isn’t about being American but about being human. The people that did this are less than human.

 

Bubba Ray Dudley says that which does not kill us makes us stronger. Even though a lot of people were killed, America is stronger.

 

Here’s Rock, who is WCW Champion. That was always weird for some reason. He talks about how this is a special night and he’s here to have a great time, live on his show. He issues an open challenge.

 

Shawn Stasiak vs. The Rock

 

Stasiak is the son of the former WWF Champion, Stan the Man Stasiak. The problem was that there was a lack of talent between the generations. He has Stacy with him so that helps. Part of Stasiak’s gimmick was that he would charge at people and they would just step aside. Rock does just that and Stasiak goes flying. Rock issues the challenge again and once again goes flying.

 

Third time the challenge goes out and one more time Stasiak comes a-charging! Rock holds up and hand and wants to know what is wrong with this guy. Every week this happens and Stasiak either knocks himself unconscious or gets thrown out of the ring. It’s probably embarrassing and it probably hurts. Instead, let’s talk about pie.

 

Stasiak doesn’t like pie. Any longtime WWF fan immediately gets the joke here. Rock asks if he likes strudel but before he can answer Rock asks Stacy if she likes the People’s Strudel. She seems to be intrigued but Shawn interrupts again and wants a WCW Title shot RIGHT NOW. Wait isn’t this match already going on? Either way, handshake, Rock Bottom, pin. Absolutely hilarious segment with Rock being his usual awesome self.

 

Bill Demott says the firefighters and cops are the real role models, not him or the people in this company.

 

Ivory says there are more good people than bad in the world. America is made up of a bunch of different people and we’ll embrace this tragedy.

 

X-Factor vs. APA

 

X-Factor is X-Pac and Albert. Pac has the Light Heavyweight and Cruiserweight Titles. Pac vs. Farrooq to start us off with the tiny guy getting hammered down very quickly. Pac gets some kicks in and here’s Bradshaw, making the tiny guy run. Off to Albert vs. Bradshaw and down goes Albert to a big boot. JR talks about dipping Bradshaw’s fist in barbecue sauce.

 

Vader Bomb by Albert misses and it’s off to Simmons. BIG bicycle kick takes his head down as JR is planning a road trip with Heyman to Oklahoma. Spinebuster takes Pac down and it’s back to Bradshaw vs. Albert. Fallaway Slam sends X-Pac flying. Albert misses a splash and the Clothesline From JBL (complete with a Hook Em Horns sign) ends this with relative ease.

 

Rating: C-. Pretty weak match but the commentary was hilarious. I have no idea if they were talking in code or if this was just random chatter to fill in time but it cracked me up. JR can be funny when he’s not taking himself far too seriously. The APA was far past their prime here but they could still fight.

 

Angle says he’s not a real hero but rather the people helping in New York.

 

Booker T vs. Big Show

 

Booker is Alliance here and the hometown guy so this is a weird combination. They don’t mention him being from Houston here for semi-obvious reasons. He and Shane have a handicap match vs. Rock at Unforgiven. There was a live even in Lexington for Sunday but it was postponed. I have never heard of that show before and I don’t think I went to the rescheduled one. JR is still talking about barbecue.

 

Show chops away and puts Booker on the floor quickly. All Show to start as Ross and Heyman continue to have a good old time on commentary. Booker gets a superkick but is knocked right back down again. This is Show in the one piece swimsuit that never looked right at all on him. Chokeslam is reversed by knees to the ribs but the sunset flip just doesn’t work at all. Show misses a big boot and a missile dropkick puts Show down for the axe kick for a long two. A second also gets two so a front flip leg drop gets the pin finally. Another short quick match that you really can’t grade as it was so short. This is getting old.

 

Lance Storm says that he isn’t American but he’s a person. Every time he’s not at home he’s going to worry about his family. This is an attack on the world, not America.

 

D-Von says this wakes us up and tells us that this is real. Everything is screwed up right now in other countries so they want to bring us down with them.

 

A retired member of the Navy thanks Vince for doing all this which really was a big deal.

 

Lita vs. Ivory

 

Lita has the pigtails and doesn’t look right in them. She has the flag with her which is cool to see. Ivory is in the Alliance here and looks a lot better in leather than in the RTC stuff. Lita knocks her around with relative ease to start us off. Sunset flip doesn’t work as Ivory grabs the pigtails. We hit the chinlock which lasts for only a second or so. Another chinlock is fought out of and there’s a headscissors to put Ivory down. Twist of Fate and Moonsault gives us another short match that wasn’t very good. Again though, it’s not a typical show.

 

Stacy says she’s 21 so she has no idea what this means for the most part. She sounds like a high school chick here.

 

Austin says he can’t change the world but what he thinks is that whoever did this is a coward. Tonight by going back to work it’s the thing to do. He offers his condolences for those that lost their loved ones and we do have to mourn, but we need to get back to the way things were. That seemed to be the common answer and that makes sense I think.

 

Booker says the people that helped in New York are the real heroes. This is going to make us stronger.

 

And now there’s this part. This is the interview/talk that makes everyone look at the company and the McMahons and say “really?” Stephanie, looking TICKED, talks about how a few years ago people tried to take shots at her family and the company but they only made them stronger. She’s talking about the steroids trial. That’s what’s happening to America today. Yes, Vince McMahon allegedly breaking the law by distributing illegal drugs has just been compared to the September 11^th attacks. And people wonder why this is made fun of so much.

 

Dudley Boys/Test vs. William Regal/Tajiri/Scotty 2 Hotty

 

Tajiri has a title of some sort here. At least I think he does. Maybe he doesn’t and it’s just part of his outfit. D-Von vs. Regal to start us off. Scotty is literally jumping up and down and screaming for a tag. Tajiri comes in instead in an unintentionally funny bit. He kicks the tar out of everyone but Test takes care of that.

 

Bubba hammers on him a bit as Tajiri is the face in peril. That back splash that never hits doesn’t hit here and it’s off to Scotty to face Test. The Worm to Bubba is broken up as is What’s Up, the latter by mist to the face. There’s the Worm to Bubba and then thankfully Test kicks the tar out of Scotty for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. Just a six man here to fill in time before the end of the show. Test got a big push around this time but they never pulled the trigger on him. He got a bigger one the previous year which was his real chance at being champion which he probably should have been. Match was more or less just there and a way to get the Worm in.

 

Lillian says she isn’t sure about her family and friends who live in New York.

 

Farrooq is mad about it and says the people that did it are cowards.

 

Regal is from a country where terrorism is more common but he can’t explain how he feels here. We have to get on with our lives though, which seems to be happening.

 

Albert talks about being disgusted by what he saw.

 

Rhyno vs. Kurt Angle

 

Was there really any doubt that the American Hero would close the show? Rhyno grabs a headlock which gets him nowhere at all for the most part. Cross body gets two. Angle hammers away but Rhyno gets a shoulder into the corner to take over. Rhyno busts out a freaking airplane spin for two.

 

Off to the chinlock now which doesn’t last long. Rhyno gets the belly to belly but the Gore misses, as does the Olympic Slam. Double clothesline puts both guys down for a bit. Rolling Germans to Rhyno but Angle takes a spinebuster to put them both back down again. Gore hits but THE POWER OF AMERICA prevails and it’s only two. Angle Slam is the counter to an Irish Whip and since it’s AMERICA against Ireland the AMERICAN HERO wins it.

 

Rating: C. Just a match really. Kurt was banged up from an attack on Monday night so that was the idea of the match here. There was no drama or heat on the match and there wasn’t supposed to be. Decent enough for the main event of a shot that wasn’t about wrestling, so I can’t complain here.

 

Overall Rating: A+. This is a show that is worth seeing if you have the chance to find it. The idea was to get people’s minds off of what happened two days before and I think they did that. There were no stories advanced or anything but there weren’t supposed to be any advanced. This left you feeling positive that things were going to be alright again, which is exactly the idea at the end of the day. Good show.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 11, 2000
Location: The Pyramid, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Armageddon and Kurt Angle shocked the world by retaining his title in a six man Hell in a Cell match against four much bigger stars and Rikishi. I’m not quite sure why someone requested this show but it’s from a great time in wrestling so I can’t complain all that much. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the Cell match with that creepy The End Is Here song playing.

Here are Angle, Edge and Christian to open things up. Angle says that Christmas is still on December 25, Elvis is still dead and he’s still the WWF Champion. The three of them have just completed the hardest year in WWF history and now it’s time to celebrate. The Canadians congratulate Kurt for his win and Angle talks about everything he went through last night, including seeing Rikishi fly through the air off the Cell and HHH’s back being injured again.

After all that though, Angle saw his hand go over Rock’s chest to retain the title in a Christmas miracle. He overcame Rikishi, Undertaker, Rock, HHH, Steve Austin and Mick Foley’s interference to retain the WWF Title. But why aren’t the people cheering for him? It’s not fair that he’s treated like this but here’s Rock with an interruption.

Rock has heard Angle bragging in the back and since it’s the holiday season, he wants to give Angle three things tonight: milk, cookies, and the beating of all time. Angle says he’s not giving Rock a title match tonight in Knoxville (“or Memphis, like it really matters.”) but he’ll let Rock get some partners for a six man tag. This brings out the Dudleyz to stand by Rock, setting up one of our main events tonight. Rock makes it a tables match because he can. He and Angle banter a bit more while saying nothing of note until Rock and the Dudleyz head to the ring to send the heels running.

Edge and Christian are worried about the tables match but Angle has a plan.

Dean Malenko/Perry Saturn vs. Hardy Boyz

This is just after Dean’s date with Lita which resulted in Lita looking stunning in some white lingerie and Dean getting beaten up. Dean made Lita tap out last night in an elimination tag. The Hardys rush the ring and we’re ready to go. Saturn is quickly thrown to the floor so Matt and Jeff can double team Dean in the ropes. A Spin Cycle puts Dean down but Saturn comes in with a cheap shot to Matt’s bad shoulder to take over.

Saturn’s Fujiwara Armbar goes nowhere so it’s back to Dean who gets caught in a belly to back suplex. A double tag brings in Jeff and Perry with Jeff going nuts. Everything breaks down and Poetry in Motion crushes Dean before Saturn takes a Whisper in the Wind. The Twist and Swanton nail Saturn but Lita and Saturn’s girlfriend Terri get in a fight to distract the referee. Lita is knocked down as Dean sends Jeff into the steps and a ridiculously fast count gives the Radicalz a countout win.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here but it was little more than angle advancement anyway. Dean and Saturn just didn’t fit in the WWF and I think everyone knew it soon after they debuted. Then again if you give Saturn something more than loving a mop, maybe he would have been something more.

Dean kisses the knocked out Lita.

Vince and the Stooges arrive.

Patterson asks Vince if Foley is going to resign as commissioner due to the injuries to Rikishi and HHH. Vince says he’ll make Foley quit if he doesn’t do it voluntarily.

Chris Benoit vs. Billy Gunn

Benoit won the IC Title last night but this is non-title. Chris wins an early slugout but Billy catches him in a gorilla press, only to pretty drop Chris on his face. Eddie Guerrero strolls out to ringside as Benoit is holding his shoulder from the landing. Back up and Chris gets two off an elbow to the jaw. Billy comes back with some basic stuff but gets caught in a belly to back suplex. Gunn gets one of his own before knocking out Benoit with the title belt but the distraction from Guerrero prevents the three count. The Fameasser connects but Eddie comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere and that botch on the gorilla press was kind of scary. Also did we really need interference and a belt shot plus a screwjob finish for a three and a half minute match? How Billy Gunn still had a job as a singles guy at this point is beyond me.

Benoit puts Billy in the Crossface for fun.

Foley isn’t sure if he’ll resign tonight but wants to be left alone to run the show.

XFL ad.

Undertaker looks at a highlight video from last night’s Cell match and says he can’t be held responsible for what happened in the Cell. He did what he’s supposed to do: hurt people. Taker doesn’t care what happens to Foley either, but it would be ironic if he lost his career twice due to the same match. Throwing Rikishi off the Cell was better than winning the title though.

Al Snow asks Foley and Lt. Commissioner Debra for a hardcore match against Raven, despite Snow’s broken wrist. Foley grants it and even wishes Al luck.

Kurt Angle/Edge and Christian vs. The Rock/Dudley Boyz

Tables match. Christian and D-Von start with D-Von scoring some armdrags of all things. Off to Bubba for a hard elbow drop before it’s off to Edge who walks into a powerslam and a backdrop. Here’s the Great One for a Samoan Drop for two as both Rock and the referee screw up the rules. Back to D-Von but Christian gets in a knee to the back to take over. Here’s Angle for the first time to pound D-Von into the corner and try a cover of his own. Thankfully the referee doesn’t go for it this time and we keep going.

Back to Christian for a chinlock as Lawler promises a puppy related surprise. Edge’s superplex is broken up but the referee doesn’t see the tag off to Bubba. Angle pulls D-Von back to the corner as the fans want the Rock. They have to settle for more of Edge pounding on Rock until he gets caught on the ropes and pulled down with a neckbreaker. The double tag gives us Angle vs. Rock with the Brahma Bull cleaning house.

A belly to belly suplex and the spinebuster set up the People’s Elbow but Edge makes the save. Rock and Edge fight to the floor as D-Von hits What’s Up on Christian. It’s Table Time but Angle moves the table before D-Von can drop Christian through it. Kurt hits a German on Bubba but it’s Rock moving the table, only to have Bubba’s head smack the edge. Speaking of Edge, a Rock Bottom puts him through the table for the win.

Rating: C. This was decent but a normal six man tag would have done the same thing. They’re setting up Angle vs. Rock down the road but it wouldn’t be for a few more months. The fans popped for the finish which is the most important part and the Dudleys can chase the tag titles for a change.

Christian is put through the table for fun.

Vince complains about Foley sanctioning a tables match the night after the Cell. He’s also looking for some papers to fire Mick.

Austin arrived during the break.

Here’s Chyna with something to say. Chyna talks about how people like the way she dresses but there are some people that don’t like how she was undressed in Playboy. However, the only people that have a problem with her in general is Right to Censor. She wants Ivory out here right now even though she’s not interested in the Women’s Title. Chyna wants her here to beat the morality out of Ivory but gets Richards as well. Ivory says what Chyna has been doing is unacceptable and what she stands for is perverse. Chyna can have a fight if she wants because what she’s doing is wrong. Here’s a referee and we have a match.

Chyna vs. Ivory

Total destruction including a giant swing from Chyna but here’s Val Venis to interfere. There’s no bell but there was maybe thirty seconds before Venis got out there.

Val and Ivory give Chyna a spike piledriver and Chyna is out. The referee waves out a stretcher and we take a break.

Back with Chyna being loaded into an ambulance and Billy Gunn blaming Foley.

APA vs. T&A

This is around the time where T&A injured the APA and called themselves the T&APA. Trish looks GREAT in an APA shirt and the leather skirt. It’s a brawl to start as JR apologizes for the match being a sloppy brawl a few seconds into the match. The APA hits a double shoulder to take Test down but it’s T&A double teaming Farrooq. Bradshaw brings in a chair and we finally get the guys on the apron. A spinebuster puts Test down for no cover as it’s off to Bradshaw and Albert. Bradshaw cleans house as everything breaks down again with the Clothesline ending Albert a few seconds later. This was a mess.

Brisco brings the resignation papers to Vince.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring for his traditional Memphis appearance. His puppy surprise is the Memphis Maniax (XFL) cheerleaders. This brings out the RTC to complain with Richards also complaining about rap music. Cue Road Dogg and K-Kwik (R-Truth) and we’ve got a six man.

Right to Censor vs. K-Kwik/Road Dogg/Jerry Lawler

It’s a brawl to start with everyone in the ring at once but Lawler take the strap down to pound on Richards. A slam and the middle rope punch are good for the pin in less than a minute. This was fine.

Foley tells Snow he needs to cancel the hardcore match but Snow talks him into keeping the match.

Austin feels the same as always: bad, but at the same time happy because HHH is in traction. He’ll go find some trouble tonight.

Raven vs. Al Snow

This is the ultra rare non-title hardcore match. Raven jumps Snow on the stage and they fight on the big rectangular mini-trons before Raven jumps over to a coil of electrical wires and slides down like a fireman’s pole. They head into the back and Snow is crushed with an anvil case.

Snow sends him into a steel door and a bulldog onto something made of metal gets two. There’s a door open and they’re in a garage area, meaning it’s very cold in a hurry. Raven is rolled into the back door of a truck and then onto the hood of a limo. Low Down shows up to beat up Snow for some reason but Raven hits Snow with a cinder block for the pin.

Rating: D+. The division was pretty much done at this point and there wasn’t much left for them to do. This was the usual hardcore match with the stupid spots but there wasn’t enough comedy to carry it. I’m guessing the cinder block shot will injure Snow to further the Foley firing angle.

Yep, Snow is on a stretcher.

The Hollies are at WWF New York.

The fans don’t want Foley to retire.

Vince yells at Foley as Mick gets into the ambulance with Snow. Foley gets back out.

Video on the Cell last night.

Here’s Vince for the culmination of the show long angle. A lot has changed since Thursday when he demanded a divorce from Linda and some of it has been good. Vince talks about how traumatic this time in his life has been and how billionaires have feelings as well. He isn’t proud of the WWF at the moment, or at least not its commissioner. Vince isn’t proud of a commissioner who forces six men into a Cell or shows no compassion for HHH or Rikishi. None of the fans are proud of Foley either, which is why it’s time for a change.

Vince demands that Foley come out here for his resignation right now. Foley comes out and the Stooges immediately back away. Vince and Mick stare each other down and Vince says he thinks Foley sucks as commissioner, but it’s nothing personal. It’s not fair to ask everyone else to put their bodies through the same torment that Mick did. Also the job has taken its toll on Foley’s health and personal life, so Mick should resign and let it be over. Vince shows us a clip of Foley saying if anyone was hurt in the Cell, he would walk away.

The boss says there’s no way out for Foley and there’s no legal action against him if he resigns right now. Foley takes the pen to sign but the chanting of the fans stops him. Vince gets angrier and angrier but Foley still won’t sign. Foley says he isn’t sure if he should sign or not but here’s William Regal with something to say.

Willy doesn’t like the barbaric path that the WWF is taking and he’s sure everyone in the locker room agrees with him. Cue Austin to a big old pop. Austin calls Regal mealy mouthed and says if he’s got a problem with anyone, he’ll tell them right to their face. The fans want Foley to stick around so Brisco, Patterson and Regal get Stunners and it’s Socko for Vince. Foley tears up the papers to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This wasn’t very good at all. Yeah there was a show long angle but it makes Foley look like a big liar and the whole show building up to it was wasted on the ending. The wrestling wasn’t all that good either with nothing standing out whatsoever. I know they’re usually spent after the PPV shows but you expect more than this.

 

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Good.  I have no idea why they wanted to get rid of it but keep something like synchronized swimming or badminton.

 

Someone do a toast for Kurt Angle.

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 25, 2002
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 10,059
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting closer to Wrestlemania and the main events are set. The only change so far has been Stephanie joining Jericho on Smackdown to set up the real main event of HHH vs. Stephanie at Wrestlemania. Other than that there isn’t much to say as the midcard will fill itself in over the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

I’ve already done the March 4 and March 11 shows. The links can be found at the end of this review.

We open with a recap from the NWO on Smackdown for what they’ve done to Austin and Rock so far. Austin came out in the truck and chased the NWO off, eventually kidnapping Hall and beating the tar out of him. Why this is set to Rey Mysterio’s WCW theme music is beyond me.

Theme song.

Val Venis is at WWE New York.

Here’s the NWO to open the show with Hall pushing a wheelbarrow. Hogan doesn’t care that the fans are upset by his attack on Rock. It felt good to hurt Rock and apparently Rock will be here tonight because being hit in the head with a hammer by a 6’6 300lb man and being crushed by a semi-truck is a one week injury. Hall talks about what Austin did to him on Smackdown, setting up their Wrestlemania match. The wheelbarrow was never mentioned at all.

Recap of the WWF on Fear Factor, won by Matt Hardy.

Tag Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Hardy Boyz

Billy and Chuck won the belts on Smackdown. Chuck punches Jeff down to start but gets caught in a jawbreaker. Off to Matt for some double teaming in the corner and a double suplex for two. The Twist of Fate is broken up and Billy takes Matt down with a clothesline. Chuck stomps Matt down in the corner and pounds away, only to be caught in a suplex to put both guys down.

A double tag brings in Jeff and Billy as everything breaks down. Both champions take Poetry in Motion but Billy breaks up the Swanton attempt. Billy’s cobra clutch slam gets two on Jeff but Lita comes in with the Litarana to take him down. The Twist/Swanton combination takes Billy down but Chuck superkicks Jeff down for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have enough time to go anywhere but the tag titles continue to mean nothing at all. They’re just kind of there at this point with no story at all. Billy and Chuck are the flavor of the month which is all we’ll see for the next several years. Nothing to see here.

Jericho and his new business partner Stephanie McMahon arrive. Jericho has a video for a production guy.

Austin has nothing to say.

Arn Anderson says he’ll hold the fort down until Flair gets here. Christian comes in and wants to quit because the fans are laughing at him. Diamond Dallas Page and his creepy smile pop in behind him and tells Christian that he doesn’t want to quit. See, all the negativity is holding Christian back. Page gets Christian to do the smile as well, saying it’s a start. As corny as this is, looking at what Page has accomplished with Jake Roberts and Scott Hall, I’d listen to what Page told me to do.

Austin does the WHAT bit and accepts the match with Hall.

We look at Angle putting Kane through a table and destroying his ankle with a chair from Smackdown.

Lance Storm vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Big Show

Intercontinental Champion William Regal is on commentary as the winner of this gets a title shot. The champion wants Lance to win here. Storm kicks Rob down to start and tries to dive on Big Show, only to be tossed back into the ring. Show slams both guys down for two but Rob gets in some kicks and Rolling Thunder for two on Storm. Big Show throws everyone around again so the normal sized guys try to double team him. A double suplex puts both guys down so Storm brings in a chair. Rob hits a top rope kick to drive it into Show’s face and the Five Star sends him to Wrestlemania in less than three minutes.

Booker T is learning Japanese for a shampoo commercial in one of the most infamous storylines of the era.

The APA gets an invitation to the Friendly Tap. The bar owned by referee Tim White.

Rikishi vs. Booker T

Booker pounds Rikishi down into the corner but walks into a powerslam for two. A spin kick puts Rikishi down again and Booker stomps away some more. Rikishi comes back with a bad looking Samoan drop but misses a charge into the corner. A Japanese spin kick misses and Rikishi superkicks him into the corner. Booker uses the referee as a shield and kicks Rikishi down for the pin. This was nothing.

Mark Henry won the Arnold Schwarzenegger strongman challenge over the weekend.

Here are Jericho and Stephanie to show us what’s on the tape. Jericho brags about how awesome he is in the ring and how awesome he is now that he has Stephanie’s genius to help him. The tape is a clip of Jericho injuring HHH’s quad last year and putting him out for eight months. Jericho claims that the injury ruined HHH’s marriage, but Stephanie says it was because HHH is very, ahem, small.

This brings out HHH with Stephanie making small jokes all the way to the ring. HHH implies Stephanie is very wide down there with the fans not seeming to get the joke. HHH remembers Jericho is champion and asks for a match tonight even if the titles aren’t on the line. This brings out Angle who apparently has Vince’s authority to give himself a title shot tonight. Angle leaves so HHH beats up Jericho.

Mr. Perfect thinks people are tired of hearing about Austin, which is why they’re fighting tonight.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Mighty Molly

Jazz is defending of course and jumps Molly on the floor to start. She even rips up Molly’s cape to really show how EVIL she is. Molly comes back with some Japanese armdrags, only to be caught in a world’s strongest slam for two. A splash gets another two so Jazz drapes Molly over the top rope for two more. Jazz hits a butterfly suplex and the double chicken wing, only to be rolled up for three straight near falls. Molly misses a high cross body and gets caught in the fisherman’s DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but it wasn’t bad or anything. At the end of the day though, no one cares about either of these girls and the crowd reaction proved it. Trish and Lita were the only girls that people cared about for a long time and as cruel as this sounds, it’s because they’re better looking than Jazz. Molly was cute but she had the personality of a door.

Post match Jazz lays out Molly. Back from a break and Arn Anderson is checking on Molly when Undertaker comes out for the beating to set up Flair vs. Taker at Wrestlemania.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Angle punches Jericho while he still has the belts on his shoulders. A hard clothesline gets two for Kurt and a German suplex gets the same. There’s the overhead belly to belly for two more as this is all Angle so far. Angle charges again but gets backdropped out to the floor. Jericho rips some of the padding off the barricade to drop Angle across the exposed steel.

Back inside and a reverse elbow off the top gets two followed by some elbow drops for the same. Jericho chops him down but Angle counters a Walls attempt into a small package for two. A hot shot puts Angle down but he runs the corner to suplex Jericho down for another near fall. JR points out the obvious flaw in the match: the fans don’t like either guy so there’s no one to cheer for.

Rolling Germans take the champion over but Jericho escapes the ankle lock into a Walls attempt but Angle rolls through that into the ankle lock. Jericho grabs a rope and puts on the Walls but Kurt makes the rope. Chris throws in a title belt and the ring bell before poking the referee in the eye. Somehow that’s not a DQ so Angle hits Jericho with a belt for two. The ankle lock is broken by a rope grab after only a few seconds and an enziguri sends Kurt to the floor. Cue Kane to throw Angle back into the ring so the Breakdown can end Angle.

Rating: C+. This was good for the most part as you would expect from these two but the ending was WAY overbooked for what they were going for. JR was absolutely right with the whole “fans don’t know who to cheer for” thing, which really dragged the match down. Still though, given how lame the wrestling has been in previous weeks, this was solid stuff.

Kane swings a chair at Angle but Kurt ducks and bails through the crowd.

During the break Flair arrived, over an hour and a half into the show. He heard about Arn and immediately left. Ok then.

Hogan goes into Rock’s locker room.

Back from a break and Hogan is talking to the Rock….who is made of cardboard. Hogan talks a lot of trash and says nothing of note at all. He punches the cardboard down after talking about how big of a legend he is.

The APA goes to the Friendly Tap and get jumped by Billy and Chuck. All of the other patrons were gay men/men in drag as part of some joke that wasn’t funny.

The NWO wishes Perfect good luck tonight.

Mr. Perfect vs. Steve Austin

Austin shoves him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Perfect takes him into the opposite corner and gets flipped off for his efforts. A shoulder block puts Austin down and a headlock sends us to a stalemate. They chop it out in the corner and Austin whips him around the ring a few times, getting two off a clothesline. An elbow to the jaw puts Steve down but Austin shrugs it off, does his stomping and hits the Stunner for the clean pin.

Rating: D. This was there to set up whatever post match stuff we’ve got going on. Perfect was a good guy to bring back in but there was clearly nothing for him to do this time around. Nothing to see here as the crowd didn’t care as most of them probably don’t remember Perfect in the first place.

Post match Hall brings the wheelbarrow full of cinder blocks to the ring. The NWO comes out for the beatdown and one of the blocks is broken over Austin’s right knee. This would explain why Austin spent the next few weeks with his left knee heavily taped.

Overall Rating: D. Well that happened. That was my response to almost everything that happened on tonight’s show: that just happened and it didn’t make me want to see anything at Wrestlemania at all. Austin vs. Hall doesn’t do anything for me, Rock vs. Hogan exists but there’s no Rock to build the match and I don’t know of anyone who wants to see Stephanie vs. HHH. Nothing to see here as Wrestlemania 18 continues to look incredibly lame.

Here’s the March 4 Raw if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/01/09/monday-night-raw-march-4-2002-its-two-weeks-before-mania-right/

Here’s the March 11 Raw if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/09/23/monday-night-raw-march-11-2002-for-the-only-time-in-history-steve-austin-vs-hulk-hogan/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 18, 2002
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 13,967
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

No Way Out has passed and the main story is Hogan/Hall/Nash have returned to the company for the first time in years. Last night they kept Austin from winning the title, setting up their first feud in the company. Other than that there isn’t much to say, but we’re officially on the road to Wrestlemania, which is only four weeks long this year. Let’s get to it.

Here’s a very ticked off Austin to open the show. He has Jericho beaten last night but the NWO came in when Austin had Jericho right where he wanted him. Three pieces of trash came down to the ring (JR: “That’s the NWO.” Thanks Jimmy.) and now Austin wants them all here right now. The NWO comes to the stage and Austin says he has a Stunner for all of them. They huddle up but Austin says there’s nothing to think about. The NWO comes to the ring but turns around and walks away. Austin says he’s going to stand in this ring and drink beer all night until he gets a piece of the NWO.

We take a break six minutes into the show and come back with Austin threatening to go on strike until the NWO comes out here for a fight. Instead he gets Kurt Angle with a legion of security. Angle has something to say so Austin launches beer cans at him. Kurt says it’s his time now and if there’s one thing he can’t stand it’s a crybaby. Austin is sitting in a chair on the far side of the ring and is hitting Kurt who is only a few feet down the ramp. That’s one heck of an arm.

The security (off duty cops according to Angle) and Angle come to the ring because Angle has an announcement to make. Austin keeps throwing beers and isn’t interested in getting out of the ring at all. Angle finally gets in the ring and says he’ll make his announcement with Austin there: HE’S GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA! Austin is tired of listening and takes Kurt down, drawing in the security for right hands, meaning Austin is being arrested.

Post break Austin is taken into the police car where Angle and the NWO taunt him.

Hardy Boys vs. Lance Storm/Christian

Lance starts with Matt and neither guy can hit a hiptoss. Matt takes him down with a clothesline and it’s off to Jeff for the fangirl pop. A dropkick puts Christian on the floor and Jeff hits the legdrop between Lance’s legs. Jeff goes up top but gets crotched down by Christian who comes in to take over. Jeff makes a quick comeback but misses a dropkick, keeping Christian in control.

Back to Storm who gets kicked in the chest, allowing for the hot tag off to Matt. House is cleaned but everything breaks down. Jeff misses a dive to the floor and Christian gets two off the reverse DDT to Matt. Christian has a tantrum and Lita hits the Litacanrana to Storm on the floor. The Unprettier (Killswitch) is countered into the Twist of Fate and Jeff’s Swanton gets the pin.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t anything to this one and the announcers ignoring the match to talk about how horrible the arrest was didn’t help things. The Hardys’ time was over by this point due to them not having anyone of note to feud with. The Dudleys weren’t going to do anything else of note at the moment so the tag division was clearly on the decline.

Kurt Angle comes in to see Stephanie so she can congratulate him for his accomplishments in the last 24 hours. Flair comes in and makes a rematch of HHH vs. Angle for the Mania title shot with Stephanie barred from ringside. Thanks for paying for the PPV people!

Undertaker asks a stagehand where Flair’s office is. “Uh…Ric Flair?” “THE CO-OWNER OF THE COMPANY! YOUR BOSS! WHERE IS HIS OFFICE!” “Down the hall to the left.” “WAS THAT SO HARD???” That was hilarious for some reason. Taker goes into Flair’s office and wants a match with Naitch at Wrestlemania. Flair says no because he’s an owner now.

The NWO is leaving to go get dinner but Hogan says he has something personal to take care of and to send the car back for him in about half an hour.

Mr. Perfect vs. Kane

Before the match, Perfect calls out Chicago Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher for failing in the playoffs. Mr. Perfect NEVER loses you see. Kane knocks him to the floor with ease as the arena is full of smoke from Kane’s entrance. Back in and Kane easily fights out of the PerfectPlex and the chokeslam is good for the fast pin. Basically a squash.

Here’s Hogan with something to say. He talks about how great it is to be back in a WWF ring because the WWF made him a legend. Hogan and the fans have fought everyone from Russians to monsters to Andre the Giant and they did it all together. Then in 1993, the fans stopped caring about him and drove him out of the WWF, just like the Chicago fans did to Michael Jordan. For doing that, all of the fans can stick it. Hogan goes into a rant about how he made wrestling what it is today and says no one is a bigger icon than he is.

Cue the Rock and it’s time to set up Wrestlemania. They circle each other and Rock takes off the glasses. He does the FINALLY bit and now we get down to business. Rock talks about how amazing it is to see these two in the ring together before saying he agrees with Hogan on a few things. It wasn’t the fans that drove him out of the WWF if that’s what Hogan thinks. Hogan goes to respond but Rock hits him with IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK.

Rock says the people believed in Hogan and the Rock was one of them. After years of eating the vitamins and tearing the t-shirt, Hogan changed everything in WCW and the fans wanted nothing to do with him. Rock acknowledges that Hogan is a legend and an icon, perhaps even the best ever.

Hogan has talked about headlining Wrestlemania after Wrestlemania after Wrestlemania, so how does he feel about headlining one more Wrestlemania with the Rock. The fans REALLY like that idea but they’re not sure who to cheer for. Hogan calls Rock the flavor of the month and asks Rock why he thinks he’s even in Hogan’s league. Rock calmly asks yes or no and appeals to Hogan’s desire to be the definitive best ever. After an appeal to the people and doing Hogan’s hand to the ear, Hogan finally says yes. Eleven and a half years later this still gives me chills.

Since it’s so great though, let’s screw it all up. Hogan wishes Rock luck but Rock says Hogan needs it more BROTHER, before pulling him into a Rock Bottom. Rock goes to leave but Hall and Nash knock him down the aisle and the beatdown is on. Hogan whips Rock with the weightlifting belt and Hall and Nash hit their finishers. Hogan goes under the ring and pulls out a hammer to blast Rock in the back of the head, laying him out cold. It should have probably killed him but it’s wrestling after all. Hogan drops a leg and Hall counts three to really set up Wrestlemania. We even get the spray paint to really hammer things in.

What an awesome segment. It had a great moment with the past and the present dynamic followed by Hogan REALLY nailing the idea of being a heel to stop his face reactions. The hammer stuff was great and Rock can return at Wrestlemania to get his revenge in the awesome moment to make the match even bigger.

Now if you’re a fan of the WWF, you know they’re not going to simply let an awesome moment like that exist on its own.

Rock is taken out on a stretcher and we go to a break. Back with Rock being loaded into an ambulance (with his arms not even secured) and is about to be taken away….when the NWO attacks the ambulance. They beat on it with chains as Hogan is yelling about Plan A. They chain the door shut (even though Rock is out cold) and Hogan says he’s going to lay the Smackdown on Rock.

He proceeds to get into a SEMI-TRUCK and RAMS IT INTO THE AMBULANCE. And there goes the moment. We went from an amazing staredown to this over the top nonsense because wrestling isn’t enough anymore. The NWO looks into the ambulance and panic before running away. JR and Lawler go into serious mode and talk about how real this is. You know, because this kind of stuff happens every day.

Godfather vs. Booker T

You know, because going from Rock nearly being murdered to Godfather is a fine transition. The girls are worried about Rock and Godfather is annoyed with them as a result. Booker stomps him down in the corner as the announcers are still acting all serious. Godfather makes a quick comeback with his usual stuff but the girls are still distracting him. A powerslam puts Booker down but Godfather yells at the girls instead of going for the Ho Train. Booker superkicks him down for the pin.

Paramedics and cops check on Rock.

Goldust/William Regal vs. Edge/Rob Van Dam

Brawl to start of course with the expected pairings going at it until we get Goldust vs. RVD to start. Goldie pounds him down for a bit before Regal comes in and gets caught by a cross body. Back to Goldust to pound on Rob a bit more as Jerry talks about a second ambulance arriving. Rob finally gets in a kick and everything breaks down. Edge spears Regal down and puts on the Edgecator (Sharpshooter but Edge doesn’t step over) for the tap out.

Rating: D. Nothing match here with the announcers again ignoring everything going on for the sake of the Rock stuff. I’d be ok with that if it was something serious, but the truck stuff was so over the top and stupid that there was no way to take it seriously at all. These feuds are going nowhere anyway.

Rock is taken away. Not that we saw him in the last two segments or anything.

Angle is distracted but by Flair’s decision instead of Rock. Cole brings up Rock and Angle feels bad about that too, but Rock didn’t have a Wrestlemania title shot to lose.

Kurt Angle vs. HHH

The winner gets the shot at Wrestlemania, Stephanie is banned from ringside and Jericho is on commentary. Jericho makes fun of the WHAT bit as soon as he sits down in a funny bit. HHH punches him fro the apron but Angle quickly takes the fight to the floor. HHH is sent into the steps and we head inside again with Kurt in control. Angle stops a comeback with a knee to the ribs and gets two off a suplex. Jericho lists off great names like Thesz and Gotch but thinks he’s just a bit better.

Angle stomps away in the corner for two more and puts on an abdominal stretch to the injured ribs. HHH reverses into one of his own, only to be hiptossed down. Another belly to belly gets another two on HHH and there’s a third since the first two went so well. They head outside again with HHH avoiding a charge into the post to hurt Angle’s shoulder. Back in and a neckbreaker puts Kurt down before HHH DDTs him for two. The spinebuster gets two more but Angle counters the Pedigree into a catapult into the corner.

Kurt can’t follow up immediately but he catches HHH in another suplex. The moonsault is countered into a bottom rope electric chair for a very close two. HHH heads to the floor for no apparent reason, only to be caught in another belly to belly onto the mats. A belt shot to HHH’s head puts him down again as Jericho has the referee. It’s only good for two so Angle rolls some Germans and puts on the ankle lock. HHH dives to the ropes and Angle is all ticked off. A Pedigree attempt is countered into the ankle lock again but HHH rolls through and hits the Pedigree to go to Wrestlemania again.

Rating: B. At least the match was good. I don’t think anyone believed there was any chance Angle would win here but at least we got an entertaining twelve minute match to make up for it. The lack of selling the ribs was a bit stupid but at least it wasn’t the focus of the match for the most part.

Overall Rating: C-. Well the showdown and the main event were good but they’re not really enough to save the rest of this show. Wrestlemania is looking like it could be good but the matches aren’t going to be much to see. There’s nothing wrong with going for the hype instead of the substance, but stuff like Rock vs. Hogan does not need the over the top nonsense and it’s dragging things down a good bit. The BIG divide between the main event level and the midcard stuff isn’t helping either.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: September 1, 2011
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

No we’re NOT IN ORLANDO TONIGHT! This should be a nice change of pace and it’s always interesting to see the difference between a burned out crowd as the Orlando fans are as opposed to see a fresh group of people seeing it. We get some more building towards No Surrender and it might be the last night of the BFG Series. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Hogan to open the show and threaten to get in a fight with a fan in the front row. He talks about how the Network has approved Sting’s request for a match with Flair which will be in two weeks on the 15^th. If Sting wins, it’s Hogan vs. Sting (no date mentioned but Sting said BFG and I can’t imagine it would be any other date) but if Flair wins Sting has to retire. He says it’s time for the Network to start bowing to Hogan instead of the other way.

Here’s Kurt and Hogan apologizes for Dixie screwing him over. Carter can never run things again so tonight it’s Angle vs. Sting so that Angle can cut the cancer out of TNA once and for all. Angle says all of Hogan’s enemies are now his enemies. He promised to take out all of the young guys and would be glad to add a veteran to it.

This brings out Sting who does his usual insane stuff. He’s willing to fight Angle tonight because he wants to I guess. Sting is happy to face Angle so he can move onto Flair and then the big prize of Hogan. Once he beats Hogan, the evil will leave Hogan. Sting goes to leave but Hogan says cut the music. Hogan thinks there’s something going on so Hogan is the guest enforcer.

We get a clip of Crimson being beaten down by Joe and having his leg broken last week. He’s officially out of the BFG Series.

Ray talks about being in the Final Four of the BFG Series and says the title is next.

Roode talks about working his entire career to gethere.

Storm talks about wanting it more than anyone else.

Bound For Glory Series: Gunner vs. Rob Van Dam

For all intents and purposes, the winner is the fourth man. Everyone else is mathematically eliminated and I’m not going to bother listing off the points tonight. It almost has to be Rob going but that would make too much sense so I’m not sure. Joe comes out almost immediately and Morgan jumps up to stop him. Joe kicks him in the balls but security sends him out.

After that we’re back to the match at hand and there’s not much going on. Gunner gets a slingshot suplex but Rob almost rolls out of it. Rob fires off some kicks and hits the Rolling Thunder. Here’s Jerry Lynn but Rob sends him to the back which is probably smart. Rob actually shows some intelligence and doesn’t try to go for the Five Star after being on the floor for a bit.

They trade rollups and Rob falls off the top trying to hit the one footed kick. Rob goes up again but Lynn comes back and shoves him off the top, allowing Gunner to hit a running knee for the pin at 4:57. Lynn’s smile is pretty awesome. This also puts Gunner into the four way at No Surrender as the fourth man.

Rating: C. The match was so-so but the point of this is it sets up a few stories and potential matches. I’m hoping they save RVD vs. Lynn for Philadelphia because it’ll guarantee a huge response no matter what the match looks like. I’m not sure I get why Gunner is going to be in the four way but it’s better than some other choices. At least they seem to have a plan here, which is a big upgrade for them.

Angle vs. Sting is for the world title. I didn’t realize that.

All of the Knockouts are coming to the ring for the announcement about Knockout Law.

After a break here are Eric and Traci for the announcement. Eric praises the Knockouts but then says at the end of the day, they’re still women, meaning they can’t stay focused and are always whining. Traci came to him and offered to lead the Knockouts and more sex is implied. However, Traci isn’t in charge. Karen is and Traci is MAD. Karen has her own music which is an upbeat version of Jeff’s without lyrics.

Karen says the difference between her and the rest of them is she’s a lady. They have to respect her as well. First of all, ODB and Jackie have contracts. Dang it dang it DANG IT. Traci will still have a job, beneath Karen. You can form your own visuals on that one. She’ll be Karen’s assistant, meaning servant for the most part. Tessmacher looks at her bad and is threatened with being fired and sent back to the cabaret.

During the break Winter and Mickie had a staredown and Mickie shoved her, resulting in a catfight.

Jesse Sorensen/Brian Kendrick vs. Kid Kash/Austin Aries

Aries vs. Kendrick at the PPV. Kendrick vs. Kash to start with Kendrick moving way faster than Kash. Arm drag brings in Sorensen who hits a nice dropkick and grabs an armbar. Aries comes in for a bit and is out just as fast. The heels don’t seem to get along but they manage to keep Sorensen in trouble for a bit. He hits a foot to each of their chests and there’s the moderately hot tag to Kendrick.

He kicks both of them and it’s off to Sorensen who gets crotched and almost superplexed. Tower of Doom hits as we go old school X-Division. Sorensen looks dead but manages to send Kash to the floor. Aries hits a suicide dive on Jesse and celebrates a lot. Kendrick is like the chipmunk has pneumonia and takes Aries out. Back inside Kash hits a top rope clothesline and a release suplex to set up a powerbomb but Sorensen rolls him up for the pin at 5:10.

Rating: C+. They packed a lot of stuff in here but it was cool to see an old Cruiserweight style match. It advances both feuds but it’s still nothing I’m dying to see either way. It’s not great but for what it was supposed to be, which was just a five minute match to have Aries vs. Kendrick for a bit, this was fine.

We get a video on Winter and Angelina which was thankfully changed around a lot to keep it from getting way too creepy. Now they’re just vampires which is a lot better than what it could have been.

Winter talks to Angelina about having other lives again. Winter promises to suck the life out of Mickie and the two of them will feast on her bones.

Mickie is tired of the voodoo nonsense. She’s going to wrestle tonight, so Winter needs to bring her A-game.

Video on Jeff Hardy and we actually have the Victory Road incident referenced.

Angle is having coffee and Hogan comes in to yell. He wants Angle to come to New York and take care of the Network, specifically saying kill them. Angle isn’t happy. Hardy gets to have a live mic next week. Oh dear.

Knockouts Title: Winter vs. Mickie James

Mickie goes nuts on her to start and grabs a rollup for two. Angelina tries to throw the belt in and gets ejected. Mickie grabs a half crab and Tazz says it’s very hard to get out of. Less than 3 seconds later Winter grabs the rope and is out of it. Great analysis there Brooklyn dude. Mickie has dominated most of this. The jumping DDT is avoided and both grab the other by the hair and slam them into the mat.

Winter tries that spinning slam but Mickie gets some elbows in and a rollup gets two for each chick. A slow jumping DDT hits for Mickie but Winter gets her foot under the ropes. I’m really glad that wasn’t the ending as it would have looked bad. Enziguri puts Mickie down for two. Winter tries to choke Mickie with something but Hebner makes the save. Mickie kicks Winter upside her head and gets the title back at 6:00.

Rating: D+. This got sloppy in some places like Mickie intentionally having to cover Winter weird so she could get the foot on the ropes. I cannot stand stuff like that because it looks so fake and totally takes the drama out of a near fall. I also don’t get the point in putting the title right back on Mickie after Winter had it for just a few weeks but since this is TNA, I’m sure the answer is “GIVE IT MORE TIME.”

Video on Styles vs. Daniels which is basically Daniels wondering if it’s worth it anymore and wanting one more match to prove it to himself and the fans.

Here’s Morgan to rant about Joe. He says it’s one thing to go after everyone else but now he went suicidal by attacking the Blueprint. He wants a referee too. Joe comes out and beats up the referee and the fight is on. Morgan slugs away and Joe goes for his eyes. Morgan escapes that arm drop move Joe has been using and hammers away.

There are the elbows in the corner and a running Umaga shot in the corner. Joe bails to the floor but pulls the tall guy with him. Morgan loads up the Carbon Footprint but steps on the steps too much, letting Joe know he’s coming. Joe kicks him in the little blueprints and cracks Morgan with a chair to leave him laying. Morgan tries to get up and Joe cracks the arm with a chair against the post, trying to reinjure the torn pec.

Robbie E talks to Rob Terry again and is interrupted by Eric Young. They talk about working out and THE TV TITLE WILL BE DEFENDED NEXT WEEK!!!!! I need my medicine!

Styles and Daniels say it’s time for the last match. They talk about someone coming back again but don’t say who.

Hogan is mad about Hardy coming back and tells Immortal about it. Abyss is standing off in the back and isn’t happy it seems. Hogan talks about how the deck is stacked against Sting tonight and implies that he’ll be calling the rest of Immortal out to help Angle in the main event.

AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

Back and forth stuff to start as they know each other so well. Daniels works a headlock which gets him nowhere. A big knee drop gets one for AJ. They go to the floor for a bit and AJ gets a bridging inverted chinlock (that Benoit submission that needs a name) and a gutbuster/backbreaker combo for two. Running STO gets two for Daniels but AJ hits the springboard forearm for two.

This has been very back and forth which makes sense given their history. They strike it out and AJ hits a Pele to send Daniels flying. The backflip into the reverse DDT is blocked and Daniels tries a moonsault (not the BME) which gets knees. AJ tries a springboard something and falls, letting Daniels grab the pin at 7:20.

Rating: B-. The match was good but the ending was designed to look like a botch and Daniels stole the pin. That’s perfectly fine if it leads to Daniels turning which he needs to do badly. It came off like he won on a fluke, which is he celebrates as a legit win will be perfect. It kind of cut the match off out of nowhere, but that’s what needed to happen. This was pretty good overall and the psychology was on.

Post match Daniels won’t shake his hand and is all happy that he finally won. It’s about time he turned.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Sting

Hogan is guest enforcer on the outside. Sting has blue on his singlet tonight. They speed things up to start and Sting controls, sending Angle to the floor for a breather. Back in Kurt takes over and grabs a sleeper which doesn’t last long as Sting gets a belly to back. Angle snaps off a German for two but Sting grabs the Death Drop for the same.

Kurt grabs the ankle lock but Sting is able to escape. Angle gets all ticked off but charges into a big boot. There’s the Scorpion with Kurt tapping and Hogan calls out the troops, distracting the referee. Gunner runs down with a chair but the referee takes it from him. Hogan uses the distraction to pop Sting in the chest with a chair and that does nothing. Sting Hulks Up but gets caught in an Angle Slam onto the chair for the pin at 6:35.

Rating: C. This was their usual stuff played at fast forward. The problem of the time not being there for the main event comes into play again as this main evented a PPV a few weeks ago and now there isn’t even seven minutes to give to them. Not anything of note here but I guess it advances Sting vs. Hogan a bit.

Post match Sting gets up again but all of Immortal comes out for the beatdown. Anderson runs out with a bat and cleans house.

Overall Rating: C-. It really is amazing how the crowd being fresh can make a difference. They felt alive tonight and the look of the arena was much better. It felt more professional rather than second rate like they usually do in Orlando. Not a horrible show but the wrestling left a bit to be desired, namely due to nothing having a chance to get going.

For regular TV matches that’s fine but for stuff like the main event which is a big match, it needs time to develop which it didn’t get, due to having to cram everything into the show and have segments that just didn’t need to be there, like Hogan being mad at Hardy and the Knockouts coming out for the Knockout Law thing. This wasn’t as bad as some of their shows but it still wasn’t anything excellent.

Results

Gunner b. Rob Van Dam – Running knee to the head

Brian Kendrick/Jesse Sorensen b. Kid Kash/Austin Aries – Sorensen pinned Kash with a sunset flip

Mickie James b. Winter – High kick

Christopher Daniels b. AJ Styles – Pin after Styles slipped off the top rope

Kurt Angle b. Sting – Angle Slam onto a chair

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 4, 2002
Location: Thomas and Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 9,643
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is another one of those series that I started but haven’t touched in six months. The good thing for me is I’m up to February and I’ve already done three weeks of March, meaning I can make up a lot of ground in a hurry. This is the first of four shows in a row I’ll be doing as we’re just passed the Rumble and heading towards No Way Out. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Vince threatening to bring in the NWO if Ric Flair doesn’t sell his half of the company. Flair agreed but Vince waned to sign the documents in the ring. Austin came out as well, convincing Flair to not sell and rip up the contract.

Flair says he’s been having second thoughts but he stands by his decision. However, if Vince brings in the NWO there will be huge problems.

Theme song.

Tonight it’s Rock/Austin vs. Jericho/Undertaker. Now that’s a main event.

Here’s HHH with something to say. He wants a piece of Kurt Angle after Angle attacked him last week on Smackdown. HHH has waited four days and isn’t waiting any longer so get out here RIGHT NOW. Instead he gets Booker T who says the two of them have something in common: intensity. The difference though is that Booker is a winner but HHH is a whiner. Here’s a referee and we have an opening match.

Booker T vs. HHH

HHH sends him into the steps and there’s the bell as we get inside. The Game pounds him in the head but stops to yell at the referee, allowing Booker to superkick him down. A high elbow to the jaw but the Bookend is countered into a spinebuster. There’s the facebuster but Booker escapes the Pedigree. The ax kick misses and the second Pedigree attempt connects, only to have Angle come in for the fast DQ.

The Angle Slam puts HHH down and makes his liver shake, according to JR. How does he know what a shaky liver looks like?

Post break and HHH is looking for Angle. I think we have a running theme tonight. Apparently Kurt was heading for Vince’s office.

We go to the Divas locker room where cameras aren’t a problem. Billy and Chuck come in which freaks the girls out. They show off their new poster and challenge Stacy and Torrie to a pose down on Smackdown.

HHH is still looking for Angle but finds cops guarding Vince’s doors. Angle comes to the door but the cops hold him back. Vince has made Angle vs. HHH for HHH’s Mania title shot at No Way Out. Isn’t Raw Flair’s show?

Rob Van Dam vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Ray pounds him into the corner but Rob jumps over him, setting up a leg trip and Rolling Thunder. Stacy Keibler, the Dudleyz’ manager, distracts the referee but the Dudleys can’t hit What’s Up. D-Von is ejected but Bubba hits the Bubba Bomb to put RVD down. There’s no one to send in the tables though so Bubba has to get two off a neckbreaker instead. A suplex puts Rob down and Bubba drops a bunch of elbows for two. The middle rope backsplash misses (of course) and the Five Star is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see at all here as there was zero doubt as to who was winning. Bubba as a singles guy was an idea that didn’t work at all in 2002 but they pushed him for months anyway. The problem here was he never became anything other that Bubba Ray as a singles guy, as opposed to an entirely new character in Bully Ray. It’s the same reason why Bret Hart’s singles push took awhile to get off the ground: he took time to come into his own as a character.

Post match Goldust pops up on screen to sing When You Wish Upon a Star. He wants RVD for some reason so he sneaks in through the crowd and hits Shattered Dreams.

Stephanie has a very creepy smile on her face while HHH rants about Angle. She has a surprise for him later. If the internet hat been a bigger thing back then, that face would have been a meme for years.

Undertaker is ticked off but Jericho says it’s all cool tonight.

Tag Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz vs. Acolytes

If there has ever been a more forgettable tag team title reign than Spike and Tazz, I can’t come up with it, hence why it’s forgettable. This is under elimination rules. Chuck pounds on Tazz to start but walks into a hard clothesline. Tazz suplexes Chuck down and brings in Spike for a top rope double stomp, only to have Chuck easily break up the Dudley Dog. Off to Billy for some stomping and a big flapjack for two.

Chuck chokes Spike on the ropes and Billy rams him into the barricade a few times for good measure. Spike finally grabs a suplex to put Chuck down and it’s off to Farrooq vs. Billy. A lot of things break down with the APA hitting double spinebusters on Billy and Chuck and a double powerbomb on Chuck, only to have Billy hit a quick Fameasser to pin Farrooq. Spike comes in with a quick Dudley Dog on Billy to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. Well ok then. The idea of pushing the champions makes perfect sense, but having two eliminations in a span of twenty seconds doesn’t make for an interesting ending. That’s the problem here: it was such a fast match that it didn’t have time to go anywhere and it took away whatever they were shooting for.

Here’s Vince for his weekly complaining. He talks about Flair not doing the right thing last week when he wouldn’t sell out to McMahon. After looking at a clip from Smackdown, Vince wants Flair out here RIGHT NOW. Vince demands an explanation but calls Flair a liar before Ric can say anything. See, Flair wasn’t going to sell out because of the NWO but because Flair was selfish.

Flair has to be the Nature Boy and loves the power that comes with being an owner. Ric says that’s not it, so Vince accuses Austin of getting into Flair’s head. Again that’s not it, so Vince finally lets Flair explain. Naturally it’s all because of the fans, sending Vince over the edge. The fans have no idea what’s good for business, so the NWO is coming to take care of Vince’s problems. We get a shot of Hogan, Hall and Nash with Vince saying there will be no way out when they arrive. If there was a point to this segment, it went over my head.

Arn Anderson and the Stooges talk about how bad the NWO is. Anderson thinks Flair made a mistake on Smackdown.

Intercontinental Title: Rikishi vs. William Regal

Regal is defending and has to undergo an intense check for brass knuckles. Rikishi takes over with a quick superkick and a clothesline but Regal comes back with the unnamed knee trembler. Regal pounds away in the corner as the fans tell him he sucks. The champion easily takes the big guy down into a crossface (not the Crippler Crossface but just a face grab), only to have Rikishi power out and send Regal into the corner.

Not that it matters as Regal easily takes over again with a half nelson of all things. Rikishi fights up and sits on Regal’s chest but misses the Banzai Drop. Regal loads up the brass knuckles but Edge comes in for no apparent reason to spear Regal down for the DQ, retaining Regal’s title.

Rating: D. Much like the tag title match, this didn’t have time to go anywhere and was just a way to fill in time until we got to the stuff at the end. Rikishi was reaching the weird point of veteran who commanded respect without ever really doing anything to earn it. Regal was perfect in this role as he waited on a challenger to take the title from him.

Referees break up Regal and Edge but Regal gets a Stinkface.

DDP, the new European Champion, is at WWF New York.

Rock wants to talk about the Undertaker instead of the NWO, but first we pause for some chanting from the fans. Last week on Smackdown Undertaker cost Rock the Undisputed Title so Rock wants Undertaker at No Way Out. Rock isn’t sure why Undertaker jumped him last week, but maybe it’s because Rock mentioned Maven eliminating Undertaker from the Rumble, or maybe because Rock made Coach do the Charleston.

See, Rock is the People’s Champion, but before he gets ready for his tag match, it’s time for some Viva Rock Vegas. Actually no, as Undertaker wants Rock to walk away so Rock does just that. Coach isn’t sure what to do but Rock comes back a second later and takes the mic from him. Time for some singing, but this time it’s just Viva Las Vegas with Las swapped out for Rock. Not exactly funny but the fans liked it.

Here’s Stephanie for her big announcement. If doing more Raw 2002 reviews means Stephanie in short dresses and knee high boots then it’s all Raw 2002 all the time. She immediately asks HHH to come out here but HHH looks cautions. The big idea: renew their wedding vows next week.

HHH: “That is the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard. What is wrong with the McMahons? Why does everything have to be on live TV?” That’s a REALLY good question actually. Stephanie says it’s because the fans doubt her and think she’s a failure. HHH wisely says no and goes off on her, but Stephanie is PREGNANT, so HHH gives in. You can see the swerve coming from here and the fans in the crowd think this is nonsense. Since this is a Stephanie segment, it took ten minutes to get through about 3 minutes of talking.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Trish is defending. HHH and Stephanie are leaving and HHH insists on carrying all the bags. Trish fires off some kicks to start but misses a top rope cross body to give Jazz control. Jazz shrugs off some shots in the corner and slams Trish down. A legdrop gets two and Jazz fires off more right hands to drop Stratus. Off to a half crab and then an STF but Trish crawls (nearly falling out of her top in the process) to the ropes. Trish makes her comeback with forearms but the Stratusfaction is easily countered into a suplex. A fisherman’s DDT is enough to give Jazz the title, exciting no one at all.

Rating: D. This was a squash for Jazz which is fine, but as I mentioned NO ONE CARES ABOUT JAZZ. She was supposed to be some big deal but WWF never realized that no one remembered her from ECW because she never did anything of note in ECW. Nothing match, like the rest of them tonight.

Steve Austin/The Rock vs. Undertaker/Chris Jericho

Austin is challenging Jericho for the title at the PPV if that wasn’t clear. Some fan tries to jump the railing to go after Jericho, earning his ejection from the building. It’s a brawl on the floor to start with the obvious pairings until Austin takes Jericho into the ring for some chopping. The snap spinebuster gets two on Jericho and a clothesline gets the same. Off to Rock who throws Jericho to the floor before telling Undertaker to just bring it. Jericho slips back in and jumps Rock to give Undertaker control.

Rock comes right back with a clothesline to the big man and it’s back to Austin for right hands. The Thesz Press and middle finger elbow are good for two as the fans are awake for the first time all night. Austin runs the ropes again but charges into a big boot, allowing for the tag to the world champion. They trade chops in the corner but Jericho grabs a sleeper to slow things down a bit. Austin suplexes his way to freedom but Taker gets in a cheap shot and throws Austin to the floor.

Taker chokes on Austin with a rope but Rock makes the save unlike some stupid partners. Back in and Jericho clotheslines Steve down before wrapping his arm around the post. Austin tries to come back but charges into the post, sending him back to the floor. Undertaker rams him into the announce table as JR is talking about Oklahoma on a Saturday night. Austin comes back with a Boston crab on Jericho but Undertaker makes the save and puts on a chinlock. Did no one else notice Austin’s arm being sent into the post TWICE?

Austin fights up and they clothesline each other down, meaning even more laying around. Seriously you’re ten minutes into a tag match and they’re already this tired? The hot tag brings in Rock with DDTs all around and a spinebuster into the Sharpshooter on Jericho. Undertaker makes the save and everything breaks down with Jericho hooking the Walls on Rock. Austin breaks it up with a Stunner but Taker pulls the referee out to the floor. There’s the Rock Bottom but there’s still no referee, allowing Taker to blast Rock with a pipe, giving Jericho the pin.

Rating: D+. Again, how could they be that spent to use (VERY sloppy) rest holds in a match that didn’t even run fourteen minutes total? Also, WHERE WAS THE ARM WORK? I can understand that from Biker Taker who was just worthless, but Jericho is better than that and always has been. The match was your usual main event tag with a screwy finish.

Overall Rating: D. When Stephanie McMahon doing her manipulative stuff is the most entertaining part of your show, you’ve got a problem. Angle disappeared after the first fifteen minutes and it seems that his story with HHH has as well. They’ll still have the match at No Way Out, but if you think he’s anything more than a stand-in for Stephanie, you have no idea how WWE works. Dull show here and odds are it’s not getting any better for a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

In something that won’t be said either before or again, this is going to be about a Dirty White Boy, Bismark, North Dakota and Big E. Langston.Back in the mid 1990s, the WWF had a stupid idea for a lot of one note characters, such as a wrestling monk, a rock guitarist, a magician (I think that one had potential but that’s for another time), cowboys, a garbageman and a tag team called Well Dunne.  All of these were really basic characters with only the cowboys (Smoking Gunns) going anywhere.  In addition to all these guys, there was one in particular I want to focus on: T.L. Hopper, as played by Tony Anthony (who wrestled as Dirty White Boy in SMW).

T.L. Hopper was a wrestling plumber.  End of gimmick.  Seriously, that’s it.  He was a wrestling plumber and nothing more.  We didn’t know whether to cheer him, boo him, or anything about him other than his job.  Why was he a wrestler?  Why not stay a plumber?  Was he the WWF plumber?  Was it a side job?  Why are we thinking of all these questions?  In short, there was nothing to this character and it didn’t shock anyone when he was gone in less than a year.

At the end of the day there was one major issue above all others with Hopper: there was nothing special about him.  Open your phone book and see how many plumbers you find in the yellow pages.  There are probably dozens if you live in a decent sized city.  In other words, there’s nothing special about a plumber.  This one happens to wrestle and that’s the end of the differences between him and any other plumber you can name.

Flash forward to about 2011.  Down in Florida Championship Wrestling, a power lifter turned wrestler joined the WWE developmental system.  His name was Big E. Langston and all we knew about him was that he was strong.  He needed a nickname so he was christened Florida’s Strongest Man.  Uh…..ok?

That’s kind of impressive but is he stronger than everyone in Oregon?  On the street I live on?  Can he out lift everyone in Bismark, North, Dakota?  Tell you what: I’ll go to Oregon and if the strongest man there sucks, I’ll come buy a ticket to see Langston, providing there isn’t a flight to Bismark later in the day.  It also didn’t help that there was a guy on the main WWE roster known as the World’s Strongest Man.  It really makes Langston look like a low rent imitation, so why would I want to pay for someone who might be one of the strongest men in the country, let alone the rest of the world?

The lesson here should be obvious: make the gimmick something you can’t find elsewhere.  Look at Kurt Angle when he debuted.  The emphasis was on the fact that he was the ONLY Olympic Gold Medalist in WWF History, as in no one else has ever done this.  Randy Orton is the APEX Predator, as in the top of the food chain.  Most titles are the WORLD Heavyweight Championship, not the Louisiana and Missouri Champion.

In short, make a gimmick something that will draw a crowd, not something that makes people look at what better options there are.  Make them say “I want to see THAT!”

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 13, 2001
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 9,182
Commentators: Paul Heyman, Jim Ross

We’re past Summerslam now and the Alliance war continues. Rock got the WCW Title last night and Austin cheated to keep the WWF Title. Other than that not a lot happened last night. Still though, they had a well hyped show last night and the show worked very well. It was probably the high point of the Alliance Era PPVs. Tonight we start on the road to Unforgiven. Let’s get to it.

Austin is greeted by a big celebration from the Alliance. This is Steve Austin Appreciation Night. He says he’ll lead by example and has more of last night for him if need be.

Stacy Keibler/Torrie Wilson/Ivory vs. Jacqueline/Molly Holly/Lita

The Alliance beat up Lita last night so there’s your story. Ivory and Molly start with a nice little gymnastics routine. Off to Jackie vs. Torrie and guess who wins that one. Jackie takes down both blondes and here’s Lita to a big reaction. She beats on Ivory for a bit and then brings Jackie back in. A tornado DDT gets a quick pin on Ivory. It’s as out of nowhere as it sounds.

Rating: D. What exactly are you looking for here? The match was nothing and a few of the girls looked good. In short, it was a Divas match and no one cared. These feuds went nowhere until Trish FINALLY started getting better and feuded with Lita to make anyone care in the slightest about the Divas.

The Dudleys are in the back with Test when Stephanie comes in. She says they’ve had issues in the past but now they’re both more mature. Last night she didn’t get what she wants so tonight she wants Test to take Jericho out for good. Test calls Stephanie a bad name and says he’ll do it.

Here’s Rock, the new WCW Champion. Booker had talked about taking Rock to school but last night, Booker got taken to People’s Elbow 101, Advanced Rock Bottoms and Getting Whipped All Over The Building 407. Rock requests the appearance of Booker and it’s midget time. He ends every sentence with sucka and is convinced to do a Spinarooni. Now it’s a Moonwalk, the Running Man and the Deion Sanders dance.

Rock wants to know if Booker wants to keep dancing until Lance Storm comes out. Hijinks will end tonight and there’s a WCW Title match with Storm challenging later. Rock doesn’t know who Storm is. Storm superkicks the midget which isn’t quite as good as Shawn superkicking the girl a few years back. Somehow this took over twelve minutes.

We recap the APA chasing Shane off during the WCW Title match last night, resulting in Bradshaw taking Shane down with the Clothesline.

APA/Scotty 2 Hotty/Big Show/Spike Dudley/Billy Gunn vs. Dudley Boys/Chuck Palumbo/Sean O’Haire/Hugh Morrus/Tommy Dreamer

There are twelve in this if you don’t feel like counting. Farrooq vs. Palumbo to start things off. Quickly off to Sean and Scotty. I wouldn’t expect any long segments in this match. Morrus and Dreamer try to double team Hotty but get taken down by a double clothesline. Here’s Gunn who gets caught in What’s Up but the APA saves. Bradshaw pounds on Tommy and Spike adds a double stomp off the top.

Dreamer catches Spike in a half crab but it’s off to Bubba for some power. A HUGH double flapjack gets two for D-Von. Morrus comes in and walks into a Dudley Dog. Show comes in and everything breaks down. It’s finishers all around for the next minute or so, ending with Show killing Dreamer with the chokeslam for the win.

Rating: C-. This was a big mess but the parade of finishers is always fun to see. It makes no sense as why wouldn’t they use those all the time, but it’s always cool to see. This was really the only way to get most of the people on the roster onto the shows, especially before the Brand Split, which really was a good thing.

Hurricane gives his testimonial about why he loves Steve Austin, which turns into why Green Lantern is awesome. Austin is his new favorite though.

Chris Jericho vs. Test

Jericho is all banged up from the Rhyno match last night. He says nothing of note pre match. Jericho hits a quick forearm to start but walks into a full nelson slam for no cover. Test hammers away but a powerbomb is countered and Jericho takes him down with a spinwheel kick. A neckbreaker sets up the bulldog but Stephanie breaks up the Lionsault. The big boot misses and Jericho knocks him to the floor. Chris goes after Stephanie but here’s Rhyno. Jericho sends him into the steps but walks into the big boot for the pin. Short match and not much to it.

Last night Christian accidentally speared Edge but Edge won the IC Title anyway. Christian comes up to Edge and talks about how they won the King of the Ring and the IC Title last night. Edge raises his glasses at this but lets Christian take the trophy for his match tonight.

Austin inspires Stasiak so much that Stasiak can’t say it right so we get well over 40 takes of it.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and is inspired by Angle almost winning but getting screwed last night.

WCW Title: Lance Storm vs. The Rock

Storm jumps the champ to start and Rock is in some trouble. Rock comes back with a clothesline and punches away. Storm hits that perfect superkick of his to knock Rock to the floor. Back in Rock charges into an elbow and Storm gets two off a clothesline. Storm punches him down but walks into a spinebuster to put both guys down. The champ gets two off a DDT. Rock Bottom ends this clean.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad I guess but what was the point? Rock was never in any real jeopardy (as expected) but there wasn’t even a hurdle for him to get over. This went nowhere though and seemed kind of stupid to do to a guy that lost the IC Title last night. Couldn’t they swap in like Hugh Morrus or someone like that here?

Little Booker comes in for a People’s Elbow and two Spinaroonis.

We recap last Thursday where Saturn beat Moppy and then had Moppy stolen. He put her face on a milk carton. I think Raven wound up doing it.

European Title: Christian vs. Matt Hardy

Christian makes fun of the Sacramento Kings before the match because he’s turning heel soon. Lita still has a bad leg. Christian jumps the champ to start which doesn’t work that well. Matt is sent to the floor but is back in quickly for more punching. Matt hits a clothesline and escapes the Unprettier. Twist is countered and Christian gets a rollup with his feet on the ropes for two. Reverse DDT gets two. Unprettier is countered into the Twist for Matt to retain. This was nothing again.

Package of stills from Austin vs. Angle last night.

Booker arrives over an hour into the show and gets laughed at.

Page thinks Sara wants to sleep with him. He’s not worried about Undertaker.

Taz says Austin has toughened him up.

Booker demands a rematch with Rock tonight. Since Shane owns WCW, couldn’t he make the title match anytime he wanted to? Regal makes midget jokes and explains the midget to Booker. Tajiri laughs so tonight it’s Booker vs. Tajiri.

Booker T vs. Tajiri

Booker is in street clothes. Booker welcomes Tajiri to the fire so Tajiri fires (see what I did there?) off kicks. Tajiri gets caught by a beating and we go to the floor. Booker beats on him for about two minutes until the referee disqualifies him. Yeah keep making those young and popular guys look like jobbers WWF. Keep it up and see what’s going to happen with it.

Taker makes sure Sara wants to fight DDP tonight.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sara

Sara is allowed a free slap. Page shoves her down so Undertaker pulls him to the floor, chokeslams him on the concrete, the bell rings and Sara gets the pin in four seconds. And AGAIN, a WCW guy is made to look like a joke, meaning there’s no point in caring about him at all. Stuff like this is probably one of the biggest reasons the Invasion failed (along with the McMahons and it lasting five months).

Here’s the whole Alliance for Steve Austin Appreciation Night. Some of them have gifts for Austin. Heyman is the master of ceremonies here. Hurricane says that Green Lantern has been his hero but now Austin is his hero. Didn’t he say this earlier? He’s going to wear an Austin shirt instead of the Green Lantern one. Kanyon gives him a Who Better Than Austin shirt. Debra gives him a plate of the famous Debra Cookies. Heyman saves him from having to eat one by airing a video package of Austin’s time in the Alliance. All five weeks of it.

Stephanie gets in and calls the rest of the Alliance in as well. And now, a song. Yes a song. It’s the high point of the camp value of this, minus the good aspect of it. Lillian is brought in to sing, and I couldn’t possibly make this up, Wind Beneath Our Ring. It’s a version of a Bette Middler song and the words are on the screen with a bouncing Austin head. Stephanie makes her start again for a lack of heart and soul.

Now Stephanie is going to lead it. JR: “Oh God not that.” It makes Vickie Guerrero sound like Shakira if you’re interested. Chavo sings some of it for some reason as does Terri. Even Raven sings as does Justin Credible. I’m in awe of this. Not because it’s good or anything, but because THIS IS AIRING ON MONDAY NIGHT RAW.

Austin thanks everyone for it and yells at Tazz for wearing a Tazz shirt. FINALLY Angle arrives in the milk truck to spray everyone down/ Stasiak takes a header into the truck which gets the only laugh of the show out of me. JR says the Billion Dollar Princess has just become the Dairy Queen to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. There’s nothing redeeming about this show at all. Nothing. The longest match is the twelve man tag at just over five minutes. Everything else is a squash with the Alliance guys being decimated AGAIN. Then to top it off, they sang a Bette Middler song until a guy came out and sprayed everyone down with milk. Even TNA would say that was stupid. Horrible HORRIBLE show and one of the worst I can remember in a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Raw 10^th Anniversary
Date: January 14, 2003
Location: The World, New York City, New York
Hosts: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a very different kind of show in that there’s nothing original on it. It’s basically an awards show/retrospective of the first ten years of Monday Night Raw with people coming back and talking about memories. This show is remembered very badly for a variety of reasons we’ll get into here. I’m not sure how well the reviewing here can go but it’s worth a shot. Let’s get to it.

Since there’s nothing to rate, this is going to be me recapping everything and giving my take on it as it happens. You’ll get the idea.

The opening video is a mashup of all the old intros to WWF programing in the last ten years. Nice touch.

Highlight package of the first year of Raw which I really need to get to someday. This transitions into a video on the entire ten years with a big focus on the Attitude Era. Yeah if you’re looking for ANYTHING from 1994-1996, you’re in the wrong place. The video is set to Bawitaba by Kid Rock to really hammer in the annoyance factor.

JR and King welcome us to the show. We’re going to get a top ten moments in Raw history. Oh this is going to be GOOD.

Our first award is Diva of the Decade presented by Shawn Michaels. Before we get to the award we get through the storyline stuff with Shawn talking about being the #1 entrance in the Rumble. Shawn makes fat jokes about Bertha Faye (killed herself about a year and a half before this) and Bull Nakano who most fans likely don’t remember.

The nominees are Sable (should win), Sunny (not a bad choice), Trish Stratus (Fine in modern times, absurd in 2003), Lita (not even the best Diva in 2003) and Chyna (not happening but there’s a minor case for her). The winner: Trish Stratus. You know, the chick who hasn’t even been around for three years at this point, hasn’t even wrestled for two years, and hasn’t been any good for a year.

Sable closed out Raw in 1998 on multiple occasions but Trish wins, presumably because she’s here. Her dress is barely there which helps a bit, but this is going to be a mess for the next two hours. Moolah is in the audience and looks asleep. Trish also thanks Fit Finlay who did some great things with the Divas. He hadn’t done them yet but I don’t think anyone cares about stuff like common sense tonight.

The #10 moment is This Is Your Life Rock. That should be WAY higher, as in like top three at worst.

Shane McMahon presents the Don’t Try This At Home award, which is for the biggest bump. The crowd keeps cutting him off until we get to the nominees: Big Show chokeslamming Undertaker through the ring, Jeff Hardy in TLC 3 (no specific bump), the Dudleyz powerbombing Mae Young off the stage through a table, (that was awesome but not memorable) or Kurt Angle missing the moonsault off the cage to Benoit.

Angle wins, in another bad decision. It’s not as bad as the previous one but the winner should have been something like the Outlaws shoving Foley and Funk off the stage in the dumpster. It’s memorable, it was big and it set up future stuff. Big Show was on his way up to the podium when Angle’s name was announced. Angle, Haas and Benjamin celebrate and hold up an American flag but get played off by the music before Kurt gets too far into a speech about high school.

Stacy introduces the list of bad gimmicks from over the years, which is too long to list. Think of almost any stupid gimmick from the 1990s and it’s here. Here’s the thing though: a lot of them (IRS for example) were fine gimmicks that lasted for YEARS but now they’re stupid? WWF didn’t mind putting them on PPV and asking us to pay for them, but now they’re silly? Yeah stuff like T.L. Hopper was dumb, but Doink for example was a great idea.

Moment #9 is Austin crushing Rock’s Lincoln with a monster truck. Stacy calls it a moment that changed wrestling forever. I haven’t thought of this moment in years so I think she’s wrong on that one.

Booker T presents the Tell Me I Didn’t Just See That award which speaks for itself. The nominees are the Three Faces of Foley in a sitdown interview at the same time (cool but Roddy Piper basically did the same thing back in the mid 80s with a mirror), Bischoff and Vince hugging (that’s fine), Bart Gunn wins the Brawl For All (the idea of that winning an award is hilarious), Kane being able to control fire (that’s kind of amusing when you take a step back and think about what he’s doing) and Austin riding a Zamboni to the ring to attack Vince.

Foley wins….and isn’t here because he left in 2001. So not only do they pick the wrong one (Vince vs. Bischoff should have won given the nominees) but they pick a guy who isn’t even there? Goldust comes up to present the award with Booker, because a guy painted gold and wearing a smoking jacket and making jokes isn’t a ridiculous gimmick at all but an Indian like Tatanka is. Bischoff, actually here tonight, calls Foley overrated and talks about the amount of time he has to turn Raw around without getting fired.

Ric Flair presents the role call of dead wrestlers: Andre the Giant (never appeared on Raw and died less than two weeks after it debuted), Joey Marella (referee and Gorilla Monsoon’s adopted son), Brian Pillman, Rick Rude, Owen Hart, Gorilla Monsoon (they picked a shot of him near death when he looked nothing like he did in his glory days), Yokozuna, British Bulldog….and that’s it. I guess we had to protect Shawn by not pointing out that the woman he made a joke about died. There are others who were left out, presumably because the company didn’t care enough about them.

Jericho presents the Gimme The Mic award in a weird looking leather suit. “I’m wearing it on a tip from Hollywood fashion plate Classy Freddie Blassie.” Ok points for a good reference. The nominees are Austin, DX, Angle (a stretch but ok), Foley, Vince (better than people give him credit for) and Rock. Jericho isn’t nominated? Oh wait he’s a heel right now so we can’t like him, even though Angle was nomianted.

Rock wins, FINALLY getting an award right. Naturally Rock is on a movie set so he has to do this via satellite, as a surprise. The crowd however is too New York and too drunk to be impressed, so they boo him out of the building. Rock says FINALLY but he’s not even in New York. The fans clearly aren’t pleased at all with this. Rock talks about Jericho debuting when Rock was in the ring so Jericho can turn the microphone sideways among other things.

It wasn’t Jericho who won that award but rather a guy with a bunch of nicknames. Rock tells Jericho to get off the stage as a light Rocky sucks chant begins. He wants to talk to Kurt Angle and spends nearly a minute talking about a match with Angle at some point in the past. He calls Team Angle Team Suck Squad.

Now it’s time for Stephanie to be called a “Make a wish and blow out the candles NOT THE POOL BOY” sl**. Rock makes fun of Goldust and Booker T for reviewing Scorpion King before calling Goldie a sick freak. The fans are completely turning on Rock now and the boring chants are getting louder and louder. He’ll be back soon and says a lot of catchphrases to FINALLY end this. Rock bombed here as he went on too long and the satellite thing was just stupid.

Moment #8 is Shane on Nitro, ending the Monday Night Wars once and for all. Again, this should have been higher.

After Fink brings us back in from commercial (he had to appear somewhere), here are Cole and Tazz to present the Shut Up and Kiss Me award. This is the best on screen duo with nominees of Mark Henry and Mae Young (you knew this was coming), Chyna and Eddie Guerrero (decent pick), Lita and Matt Hardy (better pick. Their first kiss was an awesome moment), Mr. McMahon and William Regal for Regal joining the Club (you knew some of Vince’s, ahem, interesting choices would be on here) and HHH and Stephanie. If you don’t know who is winning this one you don’t get WWE.

They don’t like each other too much right now but Stephanie accuses Rock of wanting to win this award with her. Stephanie recaps her on screen history with HHH and it really is funny how much happened with her. HHH wants to have a kiss for old times’ sake. He tells her to close her eyes so he can take down his pants and bend over. Stephanie slaps it and HHH walks out without pulling them up. This was what it was.

Moment #7 is the debut of Mr. Socko and Austin disguised as the doctor to beat up Vince. The greatness of the bed pan shot to the head is canceled out by Vince being anally raped with an IV.

Gene Okerlund and Pat Patterson (should have been Heenan) present Network Difficulties for controversial programming. The nominees are Mae Young giving birth to a hand (didn’t we just cover this five minutes ago?), Stone Cold Stunning Santa, 3 Minute Warning attacking the Hot Lesbians (actually pushing the envelope a bit) and Pillman’s Got A Gun.

Mae and Mark win in an even dumber pick than Trish. This was a HUGE deal which almost got Raw thrown off the air but we’ll go with the stupid comedy moment instead. It’s mainly the winner because Austin isn’t here at the moment.

Moment #6 is the Nation parody. It’s funny but this should have been last on the list. Also every moment so far has been from the Attitude Era.

Here’s Brock in a suit to present Superstar of the Decade. It’s REALLY weird to see Brock as a smiling face. The nominees are Mick Foley (with the debut of Socko shown for the second time), The Rock (BOOED), Bret Hart (BIG pop for that and a we want Bret chant), HHH, Austin and Undertaker (the only guy around for the whole decade). Austin wins as you would expect and as he likely should have. Vince says Austin isn’t here and laughs at fans who thought he would be. Dang I really want to watch this show now. I might get insulted for cheering for someone. HHH and Flair walk out because HHH didn’t win.

Moment #5 is Austin vs. Tyson. There’s a case for this being #1 as it basically launched them back into the Monday Night Wars and was a big reason why they started winning a few months later.

Time for Match of the Decade. Oh this should be fun. The nominees are TLC IV (I wouldn’t remember that if it wasn’t for the nomination earlier), HHH vs. Cactus Jack in a street fight (a forgotten classic that belongs on this list), Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy in the ladder match (Just no. Period.) and Austin beating Kane to win back the world title (this is idiotic. Austin beat Undertaker for the title in 1999 and it drew nearly 11 million people, a record which still stands today I believe).

TLC wins and I’m not going to bother talking about the acceptance speech. Instead, here’s a real list of nominees for best matches in Raw’s first ten years off the top of my head:

Jannetty vs. Michaels for the Intercontinental Title

HHH vs. Cactus Jack

Owen Hart vs. British Bulldog for the first European Title

Austin/HHH vs. Benoit/Jericho for the tag titles

Austin vs. Angle for the WWF Title in 2001

Any of those are better than the rest of the nominees combined. TLC was NOTHING but most of the people in it are there so it wins an award. That sums up the entire problem with this show.

Moment #4 is DX invading WCW. I’ve got nothing here. This was awesome.

Moment #3 is Rock challenging Hogan for Wrestlemania 18. This still gives me chills but it has no business being this high on the list.

Moment #2 is Raw Is Owen. Leave it to WWE for turning something like someone’s death into a way to pat themselves on the back. Pay no attention to Jeff Jarrett having to perform in a comedy match five minutes after watching his friend plummet to his death.

Moment #1 is the Austin beer bath of the Corporation. Yeah, seriously. Allegedly these were selected by fans but WWE fans are smarter than this. Edge presents it and brings the rest of the roster to the stage for a bow to end the show.

Overall Rating: S. For shame on them. This is RIDICULOUS with the top ten moments list being either out of order, stupid, or nothing of note. The awards made my head hurt and I knew what was coming. This show wasn’t a celebration of Raw. It was a cheap ratings ploy to talk about the Attitude Era and have zero effort put into it at all. Look at the specials today and you’ll see a ton of nostalgia packages and highlight videos which talk about various things you haven’t thought of in years and can smile at later. This was horrible and insulting to my intelligence as a Raw fan rather than anything fun. Shame on WWE for this.

Here’s the Rumble if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/16/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-2003-best-of-both-worlds-and-a-boring-rumble/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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