Monday Night Raw
Date: October 6, 2008
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with No Mercy and the big story around here is that Chris Jericho defeated Shawn Michaels in an outstanding ladder match to retain the World Title. That should wrap up their feud for good as we move on to Cyber Sunday. Jericho is going to need a fresh challenger and as luck would have it, Batista became #1 contender last night. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Mercy if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going. Jericho talks about how Mike Adamle will not be here tonight due to a meeting with the McMahons, so Jericho is in charge tonight. He’s still sore from last night and has a banged up tooth, which he has to live with for the rest of his life. Every time he sees that, he will think of Shawn Michaels, which ironically will make him smile. Jericho knows Michaels is here tonight and wants revenge, so tonight Michaels can face Lance Cade, anything goes. Now you have to admit that he is the best in the world, but here is Batista to interrupt.

Batista tells him to pick the number of days until their title match. It could be seven days, fourteen days, or two-day. Jericho doesn’t back down because he knows he could beat Batista, who needs to get out of this ring right now. Batista laughs that off and plants him with a spinebuster. Simple and to the point here and it worked fine.

During the break, Jericho announced that Batista will have to beat JBL again tonight to remain #1 contender. As a bonus, Jericho himself will be guest referee.

Mickie James/Jamie Noble vs. Beth Phoenix/Santino Marella

William Regal and Layla are at ringside. Before the match, Marella says he is trying to become more American, so he has adopted a new NBA team: the Oklahoma City Thunder, which is the recently departed Seattle Super Sonics. Eh it’s one of those classic heel moves that always works.

James elbows Phoenix in the face to start and it’s off to the men, with Noble kicking away in the corner. Everything breaks down and James dropkicks Phoenix out to the floor, leaving Noble to grab a sunset flip for two. We settle back down and Phoenix grabs Noble from the apron, allowing Marella to roll him up for the fast win.

Post match Noble and Regal get in a fight, likely setting up another mixed tag.

Shawn Michaels is tired, sore and in pain and he knows Chris Jericho feels the same. Lance Cade is supposed to take Michaels out but tonight Michaels is going to show that he still has gas in the tank.

Kofi Kingston vs. Ted DiBiase Jr.

Cody Rhodes and Manu are here with DiBiase so here is CM Punk to even things up a bit. Kingston leapfrogs him a few times before hitting a jumping back elbow. DiBiase is right back with a knockdown of his own and we hit the quickly broken chinlock. Back up and Kingston strikes away, including the jumping dropkick. Manu’s distraction doesn’t work though as Kingston knocks him down and gives DiBiase the Russian legsweep. Punk goes after a distraction Rhodes but DiBiase grabs a Million Dollar Dream into a Russian legsweep of his own for the fast win.

Chris Jericho talks to Randy Orton and says tonight, he’s going to work.

Video on John Cena, who is working on getting better after neck surgery.

Kane, Mark Henry and Tony Atlas have no interest in meeting Dolph Ziggler.

Rey Mysterio/Kane vs. Matt Hardy/Rey Mysterio

Tony Atlas is here with the villains. Mysterio slugs away at Kane to start but can’t get very far. Instead he manages to get Kane into the corner so Hardy can help with the mon…well the taller monster, but Kane cuts that off rather quickly. Henry tries to come in but gets taken down by the leg, with Hardy and Mysterio hitting a double dropkick.

We take a break and come back with Hardy in trouble but he gets away for the tag to Mysterio. That means the pace can pick up, including a springboard legdrop to Henry. Kane gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and comes in to stomp away in the corner. Henry’s headbutt drops Mysterio again but Kane misses his top rope clothesline. Hardy comes back in as everything breaks down, with Mysterio hitting a 619 to Kane and Hardy going up top. Henry gets creative by throwing Mysterio at the ropes though, knocking Mysterio into the chokeslam to give Kane the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty run of the mill power vs. speed match here and it worked about as well as usual. If nothing else, it was nice to see a pair of feuds tied together to give us something fresh. Henry is probably coming after Hardy one more time and it’s pretty clear Mysterio vs. Kane isn’t done so this was a nice use of time.

Shawn Michaels vs. Lance Cade

No DQ and Cade actually drops him with an early clothesline. They go outside with Cade hammering him down some more and loading up a table. Michaels gets put through it as this is quite the one sided beating thus far. Cade grabs a chair but Michaels takes him down and hammers away. A chair shot to the head drops Cade and Michaels just unloads on him with the chair for the pin.

Post match Michaels beats on Cade with the chair even more, much to the fans’ delight.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring and announces that the fans will get to face Santino Marella for the Intercontinental Title at Cyber Sunday. You can pick from Roddy Piper, Goldust or the Honky Tonk Man. Throwing Piper in there does offer a bit of a mystery winner, as otherwise this should be Honky Tonk Man in a walk.

Here is the Great Khali to interrupt Lilian Garcia. Runjin Singh says Khali is not happy with Jackass’ Johnny Knoxville (this isn’t where I saw this going). We see a clip from an interview between Knoxville and Khali, with Knoxville asking about the proportions of a certain part of Khali’s anatomy. This results in Khali storming off and then inviting Knoxville to Raw next week. To show that he’s a fun loving guy, we get the Khali Kiss Cam, with Khali kissing Garcia, who isn’t sure what to think.

Here is Jillian Hall to sing some Nirvana, which doesn’t go well.

Jillian Hall vs. Kelly Kelly

Miz and John Morrison and Cryme Tyme are on commentary for a lot of bickering. Kelly gets sent to the apron to start and is knocked outside just as fast. Hall rams her into the apron as Cole cannot get a word in as the other four have not stopped arguing. Back in and Hall throws her down by the hair as commentary is throwing out Chris Jericho related insults. Miz says something about a bowl of chili as Hall works on a backbreaker. Lawler FINALLY gets in a word and talks about Hall beating on Kelly but the argument is right back on. Kelly gets a victory roll for the pin.

Rating: C. Ok, so the match was absolutely nothing, but the commentary was a blast, as it was basically “how long can you guys argue without taking a breath?”. It almost turned into a game as they just kept going and it wound up being really funny. This was totally different than what you usually get around here and it was really fun as a result.

Video on John Cena’s recovery from surgery. The doctor was astounded at how he recovered, including going to the arena the day of the operation. Yeah Cena is not normal.

Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

For the #1 contendership and Chris Jericho is guest referee. Actually hold on as we also have William Regal as guest timekeeper and Randy Orton is guest commentator. Batista powers JBL into the corner to start and runs him over with a shoulder for a rather delayed one. A shinbreaker of all things sets up the Figure Four and JBL reaches for the rope…with a brief touch counting as a break.

JBL is back up to hammer away in the corner and a big clothesline gets (a somewhat slow) two. Batista is back up with a suplex but this time Jericho won’t even count. That earns Jericho a run to the floor, allowing Regal to jump Batista from behind. Back in and JBL grabs a full nelson and then a sleeper, with Batista jawbreaking his way to freedom. The running shoulder in the corner is tripped down by Jericho so Batista hits a spinebuster on JBL. Regal and Orton try to come in and it’s a triple spear to take the villains down. Cue Mike Adamle to send another referee down so the Batista Bomb can give Batista the pin.

Rating: C. I mean, it was better when Vince Russo turned it into a thing, but JBL isn’t quite Mick Foley and while Batista is a big star, he isn’t Austin. At the same time, it didn’t help that they were rushing through things and the villains only interfered so much. It’s a good idea, but they did the Cliff Notes version here and that didn’t quite work.

Post match Adamle says Batista gets his title shot at Cyber Sunday, with the fans getting to pick the guest referee. The choices are Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels or Steve Austin, meaning Jericho knows he’s in trouble to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They set up the big title match at Cyber Sunday and that worked well, though there was only so much to be gained with the stuff they got ready. Jericho vs. Batista is a fresh match, but it’s a pretty big step down from the awesome Jericho vs. Michaels feud. The rest of the show was pretty much the run of the mill stuff Raw has been doing recently, meaning this show was about as mediocre as it gets.

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 29, 2008
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before No Mercy and hopefully that means a lot more from Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. The two of them have done some great stuff lately and are carrying the show on their backs. That’s about all there is going on around here and that can make for a tedious watch. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Batista vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. Before the match, Marella wants the Honk-A-Meter, which shows that he’s 58 weeks behind Honky Tonk Man’s record. He also has the Brain Barometer, which shows he has ten trillion brain cells compared to Batista’s 12. Shoulders in the corner, spinebuster, Batista Bomb finish in less than a minute.

Post match Batista yells at Phoenix but JBL runs in to give him the Clothesline.

Shawn Michaels, who is teaming with a mystery partner tonight, says Chris Jericho has six days left to be World Heavyweight Champion. As for tonight, how about he teams up with a Real American? A Texas Rattlesnake? Or the Best There Is, The Best There Was And The Best There Ever Will Be? Ok Michaels knows that last one is too far so he’ll settle for someone who likes him.

Miz vs. JTG

Their respective partners are here too. After a quick look at the Dirt Sheet, which featured an interview with Cryme Tyme’s “parents”, Miz drives JTG into the corner to start but gets cut off by a flying shoulder. An uppercut staggers Miz again but he’s back with the running corner clothesline. A regular clothesline drops JTG again, though he’s right back with a jumping over the back Fameasser for two. John Morrison offers a distraction so Shad Gaspard cuts him off, which allows Miz to grab the Reality Check for the pin.

Rating: C. Miz is at the point where he just needs reps, as he’s so young in his career. The good thing is that you can see the development coming along each week, as he’s having competent matches. That’s a long way to come in such a short amount of time and his chemistry with Morrison makes it even better.

Jamie Noble goes up to Jillian Hall and insults her singing before asking “sweet cheeks” to be his partner tonight. She sings a no but gets to meet Dolph Ziggler, who doesn’t impress her.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Jamie Noble/???

William Regal and Layla come out to watch and Noble actually has a partner in the form of….Mickie James. Yeah that works. Burchill hammers Noble down to start and hands it off to Katie, who can beat on Noble as well as this is an intergender match. That doesn’t last long as James comes in and gets caught with a double arm crank. James fights up just as quickly and hands it back to Noble, who shouts at Regal before missile dropkicking Burchill. A cross armbreaker gives Noble the fast submission.

Rating: C. The ending was a nice surprise as Noble seems to be turning to the good side. Granted he needs to work on his ability to speak to others but at least the stuff in the ring is working. The cross armbreaker is a good addition, as it certainly looks devastating enough. I can’t imagine he survives the showdown with Regal, but at least Noble is doing something well.

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu find Kane (their partner tonight), with Rhodes saying that since Kane is Paul Bearer’s son, he’s basically a second generation star. That means they can work together, but Kane would rather massacre Rey Mysterio no matter who is on his side. Stay out of his way or he’ll end all of them.

We look back at last week, when Lance Cade beat Shawn Michaels, albeit thanks to a Chris Jericho distraction.

Here is Cade to brag about his win and say that Jericho is just better than Michaels. He doesn’t care who Michaels has as a partner tonight either.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu/Kane vs. CM Punk/Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne

Manu elbows Bourne in the face to start but Bourne slips out of a suplex attempt and brings in Mysterio. Everything breaks down early, with Punk and Kingston hitting stereo dives, followed by another dive from Mysterio as we take an early break. We come back with Bourne fighting out of Rhodes’ chinlock but Manu is in to keep Bourne down. That doesn’t last long though as Bourne is up for the tag off to Punk, who comes in with a clothesline.

Rhodes takes him down to start in on the knee though, with Kane coming in to just stomp on him. DiBiase, who seems to get the idea of a game plan, is back on the leg, followed by Rhodes doing the same. Kane comes in and gets enziguried but boots Mysterio off the apron. It doesn’t make much of a difference though as it’s Kingston getting the tag to start cleaning house. Kingston dives at Kane though and gets caught in the chokeslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic match here but it’s nice to see Kane going into monster mode to win in the end. He knows how to do that style well enough and Kingston is expendable enough to take a loss. That’s the point in putting so many people in this match as it gave them some options for taking the fall and it went well enough.

Here is Mike Adamle for a chat. Earlier tonight, Kane requested something from him and since he won, he gets his request: if Kane wins at No Mercy, Rey Mysterio will have to unmask. This brings out Randy Orton of all people to interrupt and he mocks Adamle for being Shane McMahon’s lackey. Adamle needs to re-suspend CM Punk right now because the reality is Adamle needs Orton on his side. He’s going to wreck everyone when he gets back but here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL complains about losing money on his stock market this week but he has a lot to lose. Then he’ll become #1 contender at No Mercy and move on to win the World Title. Orton is always living in the past because he’s the hottest commodity since ethanol. Cue Batista behind JBL, who realizes what’s waiting on him and turns around to eat the spear (well that was dumb). Batista promises to make JBL’s week worse at No Mercy.

Santino Marella is on the phone and gets nervous when he runs into Beth Phoenix. Apparently it was a sick kid named uh, Frankie! Phoenix doesn’t want him out there with her this week because she’s bad luck. Marella says it’s a good thing he doesn’t have a Moolah Meter, because Phoenix is trailing Moolah by about twenty two years. Phoenix is annoyed and leaves, with Marella thinking it was a “female problem”.

Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall

Phoenix and Michelle start things off but Kelly quickly comes in for a double dropkick. It’s off to Hall, who manages to pull Michelle face first down in the corner. Phoenix’s backbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Hall comes back in and takes too long cartwheeling, allowing Michelle to get her boots up in the corner. It’s back to Kelly for the screaming headscissors as everything breaks down. Kelly’s rollup (how she won last week) is countered into the Glam Slam for the dominant pin.

Rating: C+. They did well enough here as you can tell the women are working hard to improve. It’s still not exactly great, but they’re looking confident in the stuff they’re doing. Phoenix is of course still miles ahead of the other three, but at least she’s getting something a bit better to work with over time. Nice quick match here.

Deuce vs. Great Charli

Runjin Singh is here with Charli, who yells in some mock Punjab about the greatness of…curry. Charli tells Deuce to come at him but the chop doesn’t do much. Instead Deuce knocks him down but dives into a raised boot. Charlie’s wig comes off and a top rope clothesline finishes Deuce quick.

Post match the real Great Khali comes out to wreck Charli.

We hype up the Smackdown move to MyNetworkTV.

No Mercy rundown.

Chris Jericho/Lance Cade vs. Shawn Michaels/???

Before the reveal, Jericho complains about being wished good luck in his match against Michaels at No Mercy because he’s better than Michaels could ever be. We hear about various things Jericho plans on doing to Michaels with the ladder, with Cade using a ladder to demonstrate. After a break, the partner is….HHH. Well who else was it going to be? Funny bit as Michaels runs to the back and comes back out in a DX shirt and hat because he knows his merchandise.

HHH and Jericho start things off with Jericho getting taken down, meaning it’s already off to Cade. That’s fine with HHH, who takes him down in a hurry, allowing the tag to Michaels to go after Jericho. Michaels gets caught in the wrong corner though and Jericho pulls him down into a chinlock. With that not getting him anywhere, Jericho tries and misses the Lionsault, allowing the double tags to HHH and Cade. The spinebuster puts Cade down but Jericho is in with the Codebreaker to HHH. Jericho and Cade beat on Michaels so much that it’s a DQ.

Rating: C+. Well it was going to be this or Cade losing so they didn’t have a ton of options. It’s not like HHH or one of the World Title participants are going to lose less than a week before the pay per view. At least they didn’t let this go long, as there wasn’t much of a point to doing anything beyond what they did here.

Post match Jericho grabs the ladder but HHH is back in with the sledgehammer to Cade so Michaels can splash him off the ladder. DX stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was about getting ready for No Mercy, which, at least on the Raw side, is a one match show. Does anyone really care about Batista vs. JBL for a future title shot? Or pretty much anything else that Raw is offering? There isn’t much you can do to build towards a one match half show but they managed to make it work well enough here. Not a great show, but Jericho and Michaels should be great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

It is pretty rare when you have a true one match card but that is what we have here, as Batista is defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker inside the Cell. There might be a few other things going on here, but that has been treated as the be all and end all of the show, as it should be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Survivor Series before we move on to this year’s preview.

ECW World Title: Miz vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and for the sake of sanity, I’ll only refer to him as champion. It’s a brawl to start with Punk getting double teamed down into the corner. Morrison catapults Punk into the corner but he comes out with a middle rope crossbody. Punk knocks Miz to the floor but the springboard clothesline is broken up to put Punk down again. Miz breaks up Punk’s springboard with a shot to the floor though and it’s a camel clutch to Punk.

That means Morrison comes in for the save, setting up a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to drop Punk again. A suplex from the apron gets two on Miz but he is right back with a running corner clothesline. Punk is back in with a hurricanrana to send Morrison into Miz for a powerbomb and a near fall. The running knee in the corner sets up the corner bulldog to give Punk two on Miz and a double underhook backbreaker onto the knee gets the same. Morrison is back up to go after Miz, only to be sent outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Miz and retain.

Rating: C+. Miz and Morrison’s rise continues as the two of them have become rather dependable on ECW, and now elsewhere. It makes sense to give them the Tag Team Titles and now we should be seeing even more of them. This was a good way to get the show going as Punk has to work to retain and Miz and Morrison have come far enough that they didn’t seem like cannon fodder.

We look at MVP turning on Matt Hardy, costing the two of them the Tag Team Titles.

MVP says Matt will not be wrestling tonight because he can’t walk. He is tired of being Matt’s latest crutch and he is better than any of his opponents tonight.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson

One fall to a finish rather than elimination rules. Michelle suplexes Victoria to start and then kicks her in the face for two. Torrie comes in and gets swung into the side slam, only to come back with a suplex. It’s off to Jillian vs. Kelly, with the latter grabbing a rollup for two of her own. Phoenix comes in and plants Maria but a missed charge allows the hot tag to James to clean house. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits the Long Kiss Goodnight to finish Melina.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? It was a bunch of the good women vs. the bad women and there is only so much you’re going to get from a match like that. They didn’t have time to do anything and given some of the skill levels of the women involved, that is not a bad idea. The positive sign is that the women are making progress, but a lot of them still aren’t ready to be in a match like this. Leave this thing to Raw.

William Regal and Coach are ready to see Hornswoggle get crushed by Great Khali.

Randy Orton is ready to disappoint everyone and break the Heart Break Kid.

Shawn Michaels wants revenge. And the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Holly and Rhodes are challenging. Rhodes and Cade start things off with Cade grabbing a hiptoss for some early celebrating. A sunset flip gives Cody one and the headlock goes on. That just earns Cody a backbreaker to cut him off so it’s off to Murdoch for a change. Cody takes him into the corner and it’s Holly coming in to forearm away. The hanging kick to the low abdomen has Cade in trouble and the champs need a breather on the floor.

Back in and it’s an atomic drop into a running boot to Holly’s face as Murdoch takes over again. Cade atomic drops Murdoch into a legdrop on Cody for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. Holly suplexes his way out of trouble but Cade is right there with a clothesline. The second atomic drop/legdrop misses though and it’s Cody coming in to very little reaction to clean house. Everything breaks down and Murdoch Code Reds Cody to retain.

Rating: C-. This would have been fine on any given Raw, meaning it was a pretty disappointing pay per view match. Cade and Murdoch are fine as champions and Rhodes and Holly are getting there as a veteran/rookie team, but they aren’t ready for this kind of a match on pay per view. It was far from bad, but this match was sent out there to die and I think WWE knew that was going to happen.

Team HHH, which is down a man due to Matt Hardy’s knee injury, is ready for Team Umaga. Rey Mysterio talks about being an underdog, but that has never been Kane’s thing. Kane brings up the Katie Vick incident (and goes into details). Then Jeff Hardy reminds HHH of the time he put Jeff in the hospital. HHH: “Uh, my bad.” HHH says this is the night when they can come together and do something terrible, so let’s go do it.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

We get a preview of Batista vs. Undertaker with a look at their Cell match in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Why Batista is wearing a Tag Team Title to the ring isn’t clear.

Vince McMahon sits down with Hornswoggle to explain why he made the match with Great Khali for tonight. Some people think that it is because Vince hates him, but it is really because he wants Hornswoggle to rise up like the McMahons do. Vince has been an underdog against Time Warner and the US government and he won. Now go win against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Shane McMahon comes out to introduce Vince McMahon and then Hornswoggle for some family flavor. We even get an old school explanation of the rules as the fans want Shaquille O’Neal (in the front row) to help Hornswoggle, but Vince grabs the mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want. Hornswoggle kicks the knee and then dropkicks Runjin Singh through the ropes. The green mist sets up some right hands but Khali chases Hornswoggle off. The distraction lets Hornswoggle grab the shillelagh but Vince takes it away. Khali loads up the Vice Grip, only to have Finlay come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say about something like this? The match was a segment instead of anything competitive and that is all it was ever going to be. At the end of the day, the Hornswoggle/Vince story has run out of steam and adding Finlay into the mix isn’t likely to make things that much better. Maybe they can shift things around, but Vince needs to be on to something else.

Post match Finlay destroys Khali with the shillelagh and a low blow, allowing Hornswoggle to escape.

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. Michaels came back in September and went after Orton, who had put him on the shelf. Orton kept getting superkicked but got disqualified last month. Now Michaels wants revenge but can’t use the superkick. If he does, the match is instantly over, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is challenging and we even get a weapons check. Feeling out process with Michaels grabbing a cravate of all things to start. Orton can’t even slam his way out of the cravate but he can drive Shawn into the corner for some right hands. Michaels is right back with a choke on the back before switching to a front facelock as you can feel the anger and hatred here.

Back up and Orton is sent outside, with Shawn hitting an Asai moonsault to take him down. They get back inside with Shawn grabbing a…..wait for it…..Sharpshooter. Orton makes the rope and gets in a poke to the eye, setting up the hanging DDT for two. Shawn fights up and slugs it out, setting up the forearm. More right hands have Orton in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick for two.

Some slams give Michaels a breather and the top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music. That’s a head fake though and they trade some rollups for two each. Michaels grabs a Crossface instead but Orton gets a foot on the rope. The backbreaker cuts Michaels off again but he counters the Punt into an ankle lock of all things. The grapevine goes on in the middle, only to have Orton kick his way to freedom. Michaels’ Figure Four attempt is countered with a kick into the post so he teases the superkick but gets RKOed to retain Orton’s title.

Rating: B. Pretty good here, but the amount of stipulations they had going on made it a little difficult to believe that they were going to change the title here. Shawn not using the superkick at the end looked a bit awkward though and the ending only worked so well. They had a good match otherwise though, which has to be expected when it’s Shawn vs. Orton getting time.

Post match Orton talks trash to Shawn and gets superkicked.

SAVE US!

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker for Batista’s Smackdown World Title. They’ve fought several times this year and Batista finally beat him for the first time last month. Now it’s the big final showdown inside the Cell.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending inside the Cell. They start fast with Batista hitting a hard clothesline but having to elbow his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker punches him into the corner and hits Snake Eyes into the running big boot. The chair is brought in but Batista spears him down. Undertaker’s clothesline gets two this time and they head outside with Undertaker hammering away.

A face rake against the Cell sets up a chair to the throat has Batista in a lot of trouble so Undertaker chairs him in the ribs for two. Old School is countered into a spinebuster (that was cool) for a delayed two and it’s time to slug it out again. Batista’s running powerslam gets two and they head outside with Undertaker getting blasted with a clothesline. Undertaker is fine enough to whip him into the steps and now a chair to the head has Batista busted open.

Old School is broken up again and Batista hits a superplex but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke. Since we’re in the Cell, the rope breaks the hold (erg) and they head outside again. This time Batista hits him in the face with the steps and now Undertaker is busted open too. Back in and a chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is countered into another spinebuster for another near fall.

It’s table time, with Batista tossing him through it for two more. The Batista Bomb onto the steps is countered into a backdrop onto the steps. Undertaker plants him with the chokeslam for two, followed by another onto the steps….and a cameraman breaks it up. That’s because the cameraman is Edge, who cameras Undertaker in the head. A Conchairto on the steps knocks Undertaker silly and Edge puts Batista (who saw nothing) on top to retain.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and it felt like a war, with the Edge interference being a great surprise to give them a back door out of the match. What mattered here is they kept things high impact here, which is exactly what these two do best. Let them go in there and hit all their power stuff until one of them can’t get up, which granted was due to some help in this case. You can all but guarantee the triple threat next month and that is a fresh way to go, so nicely done.

Post match, Edge takes Undertaker down again and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main events carry the show, but there is a really big gap between the top of the card and everything else. Even the third biggest match on the show doesn’t feel that important as the whole show was built around Batista vs. Undertaker. The show was a fun enough watch, but outside of the main event, it doesn’t feel like a lot of this matters in the long run.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 22, 2008
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on No Mercy, and as has been the case in recent months, Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho is absolutely carrying the show. Now we’re coming up on a ladder match for Jericho’s World Title at the pay per view, which should be a great way to go. As a bonus, this is the 800th episode so expect some celebration. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going, with the World Title above the ring and a ladder between them. Jericho climbs the ladder and sits on top with a smirk before saying Shawn Michaels is trying to rewrite history. Michaels has convinced Mike Adamle to make their match at No Mercy a ladder match. The dumb fans are going along with Michaels’ claims of revolutionizing the ladder match, even though Michaels can lie.

The truth is that Jericho has won a lot more titles and high profile ladder matches than Michaels could ever hope to. At No Mercy, all you’ll see is this, and he pulls the title down. Jericho is going to leave as champion because he’s just too good. Cue Randy Orton of all people to interrupt, saying it doesn’t matter who wins at No Mercy, because they’ll be champion on borrowed time. Jericho threatens to hit him in the mouth, but Orton isn’t worried because he’s still protected, meaning anyone who touches him is suspended. Orton says he gets what he wants, but Jericho says he gets the same and tells Orton to get well soon.

With Jericho done, Orton says he’ll be champion soon and throws the ladder into the aisle. Cue a ticked off CM Punk to go nose to nose with Orton and then hit him in the face. Mike Adamle runs out and suspends him…which brings out Shane McMahon of all people. After the usual dancing, McMahon says Punk gave Orton “a receipt” but he’s here for something else. Punk’s suspension is lifted, though no one can touch Orton going forward. As for tonight, we’ll also have Michaels/Batista vs. JBL/Jericho. For now though, Punk can have a match of his own.

CM Punk vs. Cody Rhodes

They fight over a lockup to start with Rhodes grabbing a headlock, only to get hit in the face and dropped. Rhodes manages to send him outside so Punk fires off a hard kick to the chest. Back in and Punk rolls through a high crossbody for two but gets whipped hard into the corner. Rhodes has to bail out from a GTS attempt though and we take a quick break. We come back with Rhodes working on Punk’s leg, which is reversed into an ankle lock. Rhodes makes the rope so Punk strikes away, followed by the running knee in the corner. The GTS finishes Rhodes off.

Rating: C+. Rhodes is still figuring out the being a top level guy and he has almost no experience in being a singles star either. That being said, it helps to be out there against someone like Punk, who can work well with anyone. That’s what we got here and it made for a nice match as Punk is on his revenge tour against Orton and company.

Post match Ted DiBiase and Manu run in for the beatdown but Kofi Kingston makes the save.

Smackdown Rebound.

Shane McMahon is in Mike Adamle’s office when Kane comes in. Kane wants Rey Mysterio and gets him at No Mercy. That makes Kane laugh, and he tells Shane to say hi to his mom. Adamle doesn’t know the story so Shane explains the whole thing in one of those “this only works in wrestling” moments.

Beth Phoenix, with Santino Marella, yells at Kelly Kelly about laughing at the injured Marella. For some reason Marella mocks Batista, who pops up to scare him off. Phoenix warns Kane not to interfere, or Marella will beat him up.

Here is Santino Marella to announce that he is only 59 weeks behind the Honky Tonk Man’s record…and he’s interrupted by a surprise name.

Santino Marella vs. Deuce

Non-title. Marella says this is what he’ll do to Batista, so watch what he does to Fonzie over here. Deuce hammers away at Marella’s masked face and knocks him down for a quick two. Marella is back up with an accidental headbutt to stagger Deuce and a sunset flip gets the fast pin.

Post match Beth Phoenix comes out to check on Marella.

Rey Mysterio wishes Evan Bourne good luck.

Evan Bourne vs. Kane

Yeah Bourne might need it. Bourne fires off some forearms to start but can only get so far as Kane hits him in the face. A crucifix attempt is cut off with a punch to the face (there’s always something about keeping it that simple) but Bourne avoids a big boot. Bourne sends him outside for a moonsault so Kane drops him with a pop up uppercut. An Oklahoma Stampede of all things drops Bourne and the chokeslam finishes him off.

Rating: C+. That’s all this needed to be as Bourne was able to do his thing for a bit, only to get destroyed by Kane, as he should have been. Kane is warming up by destroying another cruiserweight, but Mysterio is different enough to make it interesting. They were also smart enough to keep it short, which makes this a rather nice piece of business.

Post match Kane stays on Bourne but Mysterio comes out for the save. That means Kane gets to beat him down as well, as a monster tends to do. Kane says Mysterio is just like everyone else.

Jamie Noble asks Shane McMahon for a rematch against William Regal but Dolph Ziggler comes in to introduce himself again. Randy Orton comes in and doesn’t like CM Punk’s suspension being lifted and they compare family histories.

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Non-title and Santino Marella is here with Phoenix. Kelly gets powered into the corner but comes out working on the arm. A bouncy armdrag out of the corner drops Phoenix, who buckle bombs her right back into the corner. Phoenix works on the arm a bit but Kelly is right back with the clothesline into the middle rope crossbody. Marella’s distraction doesn’t exactly work though as Kelly gets the rollup pin for the upset.

Rating: C. It was more of an angle than a match but what matters is Kelly is feeling like someone who is a bit more than the usual Diva. Both the Raw and Smackdown women have made some strides in recent weeks and it’s nice to see the efforts paying off. We’ll have to see how it goes, but at least they’re actually having serious matches for once. That’s so nice to see after the drek that they had been doing for so long.

Post match the villains go after Kelly but Batista comes out for the save. Marella ACTUALLY HITS him and…well you can probably guess.

We recap the Dirt Sheet (Miz/John Morrison) vs. Word Up (Cryme Tyme) in a battle of web series. Naturally this resulted in Miz and Morrison doing a rap video, because what else could it result in? Morrison: “You’re not street Shad. I met your dad. He wears a sweater vest.” The Dirt Sheet was absolutely hysterical at times and it won here hands down.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Cryme Tyme

Morrison and JTG start things off, with Morrison mocking JTG’s dancing, which is really not that nice. That earns him a right hand, which allows JTG to dance a bit more (as you might have expected). Morrison comes in and gets hit in the face as well, allowing Gaspard to come in and clean house. A big boot drops Miz and JTG drops both villains on the floor as we take a break. We come back with JTG fighting out of an armbar and getting two off a rollup.

Miz is right back with the corner clothesline into the chinlock before pulling JTG into the corner. Morrison takes him down and grabs the chinlock, allowing Cole to talk about how many pyro displays the show has had throughout its history. Is that really supposed to be impressive? I know it’s one of those factoid things, but come on. JTG fights up and dives over for the tag, allowing Gaspard to come in with a powerslam. Everything breaks down and Morrison pulls JTG outside, leaving Miz to roll Gaspard up for two. Gaspard gets two off a suplex, but Morrison kicks him in the back of the head to give Miz the cheating pin.

Rating: C+. They could only do so much here, but at the end of the day, the only thing that mattered here was the pre-match stuff. This is the kind of feud that is going to get over based on everything with the microphones and the wrestling is secondary. That’s a fine way to go and thankfully the match was good enough, even with a kind of weak finish.

Chris Jericho, with Lance Cade, comes in to see Mike Adamle and suggests that Shane McMahon has ulterior motives. He has an idea for the main event, which we don’t get to hear.

No Mercy rundown.

Earlier today, Charlie Haas was at Dave And Busters and did some less than successful versions of Perfect’s sports bits. Ok that’s clever. Oh and get the new Mr. Perfect DVD.

Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield/Lance Cade vs. Batista/Shawn Michaels

So there’s the idea. Cade and Michaels start things off with Michaels yelling a lot before hammering away in the corner. Michaels pounds him down again but JBL gets in a cheap shot from behind so Jericho can come in to hammer away. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock, followed by an enziguri. JBL adds a neckbreaker and we hit the abdominal stretch to keep Michaels in trouble.

Cade comes in to choke in the corner before it’s right back to JBL for a big boot. The fall away slam is countered into a DDT though and they’re both down. The tag brings in Batista to clean house, including a powerslam to Jericho. Michaels comes back in but has to break out of a Walls attempt. Batista spears JBL down on the floor to even things up a bit. Jericho bulldogs Michaels but misses the Lionsault, allowing Michaels to beat on Cade. The threat of the superkick sends Jericho outside but Cade hits a sitout Rock Bottom to pin Michaels.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty standard match and that worked well enough, as it boosts up both matches for No Mercy. There’s something rather nice about putting two stories together into one, especially when they’re pretty much the only things going on with this show. It’s not a good sign when most of the show is in one match, but it got the job done.

Overall Rating: C. The main event summarized the whole show, as Michaels vs. Jericho is the only thing that really matters, with Batista vs. JBL a rather distant second. Shane McMahon being back is a good thing though, as Adamle being around is just so dull. I get that’s the point, but it’s only going to work for so long. Other than that, the only interesting part was the Dirt Sheet, which isn’t even part of the show. Not great stuff overall, but Michaels vs. Jericho certainly is.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2008
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to No Mercy and that means it’s time to start putting the card together. In this case that means figuring out what is coming, though the Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels feud should give you a pretty good idea. First though, Jericho has to get through CM Punk in a steel cage. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The cage is lowered.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending in a cage with pinfall, submission or escape to win. Punk hammers away to start fast and whips Jericho into the corner, allowing Jericho to try a quick escape. That’s immediately cut off so Punk goes up, with Jericho pulling him back down. The running knee and bulldog look to set up the GTS but Jericho makes the rope. Punk is fine enough to send him into the cage and we take a break.

We come back with Jericho holding an ankle lock of all things before switching to the Walls. Punk’s crawl gets his hands and a leg out of the cage but Jericho pulls him back in and slams the door on Punk’s head. The Lionsault hits a raised knee though and Punk kicks him down, only to miss a running knee in the corner.

They fight onto the top of the cage and then crash back down to give Punk two. Jericho sends him into the cage and goes up, with Punk grabbing an electric chair for the big crash back down. Punk goes for the door but Jericho dives at him and winds up on the apron. A headbutt staggers Jericho…and he falls out to retain the title in a bit of a call back to Muraco vs. Snuka.

Rating: B. Good, hard hitting fight here as Jericho escapes again, with Punk basically beating himself. It’s a clever way to keep both of them going, as Punk got his rematch and didn’t so much get beaten as much as Jericho got lucky. At the same time, Jericho gets to move on, likely to his next showdown with Shawn Michaels.

Batista is watching.

Mike Adamle is talking to Kelly Kelly in the back when some annoying guy comes in to introduce himself. Dolph Ziggler or something. With that out of the way, Chris Jericho comes in and Adamle says it’s time to focus on No Mercy. Jericho doesn’t like that and says Adamle needs to take care of him better, even offering to explain it in his office.

Kane is in a mask but explains that he had to remove it. That was for all of the people but it got him nothing. Now people ridicule him and he doesn’t like that. He wants to hurt Rey Mysterio, who doesn’t have the courage to unmask. Everyone wears a mask because they don’t like themselves. When he attacked Mysterio, he was attacking everyone. Evan Bourne comes in and says he wants to see Mysterio beat Kane. That doesn’t seem to bother Kane, who laughs a lot.

Candice Michelle vs. Jillian Hall

Hall sings some Elvis on her way to the ring and after the break, cranking up the shrieking extra high this week. Beth Phoenix is here to watch as well. Michelle grabs a quickly broken headlock to start and is promptly planted hard. Hall pulls on the hair to keep Michelle down and we hit the full nelson. Michelle fights up and jumps over her in the corner, hitting a kind of Edge-O-Matic (nice) for two. The Candywrapper finishes Hall off.

Rating: C-. The Edge-O-Matic was nice and you can see that Michelle is trying, but it’s still only getting her so far. I’ll certainly take someone at least trying to get better though and Michelle is doing just that, which is partially why she’s getting the attention. WWE is trying to find someone new for the women’s division so they might as well try it with Michelle.

Post match Phoenix comes after Michelle and gets dropkicked.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Tommy Dreamer

JBL slams him down and drops an elbow, followed by a big boot. Dreamer gets a boot of his own up in the corner and grabs a neckbreaker, only to walk into the Clothesline From JBL for the fast pin.

Post match JBL says he isn’t leaving the ring until he talks to Mike Adamle. Post break JBL is still waiting and explaining that he should be #1 contender but gets Randy Orton instead. Orton talks about his recent champions evaluation, which is why he cost CM Punk the World Title. JBL isn’t much of an upgrade, though Orton’s shoulder is almost better and he’s coming for the title. Then there will be a champion on Raw with some credibility…so cue Santino Marella and Beth Phoenix.

Marella mocks Orton for being hurt all the time, just like his dad. On the other hand, Marella’s father is always healthy! Except for having herpes. Orton: “You expect me to respond to that?” JBL wants an apology from Orton because JBL knocked Batista out cold with one shot last week. Cue Batista to interrupt, quoting Barack Obama to suggest that Phoenix is a pig. Marella says Phoenix squeals but Batista promises to beat all of them up. Marella: “Aren’t you forgetting someone?”

Batista apologizes and offers Phoenix a title shot when he gets the belt back too. Mike Adamle pops up on screen to say he’ll make his official decision on a #1 contender later tonight. Batista takes out JBL and Marella but Phoenix slaps him in the face. That earns her a spinebuster onto Marella

In the back, Orton passes Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu, with some glares being exchanged.

Kofi Kingston/Jerry Lawler/Charlie Haas vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu

Haas is Jim Ross this week so naturally he’s fat, talks about football, and pitches barbecue sauce. And yes, the fans are quiet for the dumb joke. Kingston headlocks Manu to start before slipping out of a slam and hitting a dropkick. Rhodes comes in and gets dragged into the corner for the tag to Lawler (the fans still like him), who fires off some dropkicks.

Rhodes knocks him down though and grabs the chinlock, only for Lawler to fight up and bring Haas in for some snap jabs. Everything breaks down and Haas hits a splash as everything breaks down. DiBiase avoids a charge into the corner and the cobra clutch Russian legsweep finishes fast.

Rating: C-. Hey did you know that WWE likes to make fun of Jim Ross every single chance they get? It’s the most one note joke imaginable in this situation and that’s not something you want to see. Well unless you’re Vince McMahon of course, which is why this kept happening. The match was just a way to get Lawler on the show, which was fine, though the fans’ lack of a response to Haas as Ross told you all you needed to know.

Smackdown Rebound.

JBL comes in to see Chris Jericho, who cuts him off and brings up JBL costing him the World Title last year. Jericho brings up the impending stock market crash and brags about being the champion. No, he won’t put a good word in for JBL to get the title shot.

Jamie Noble vs. Paul Burchill

Katie Lea is here with Burchill. Noble stomps him down to start fast but gets uppercutted into the corner. Back up and Noble slingshots into a cross armbreaker for the fast tap.

Post match Layla comes out to apologize for last week. She’s so sorry for taking that long to get away from Noble, because now she has found a man worthy of her. This brings out William Regal, who says Layla wanted nobility rather than Noble.

Lance Cade is meeting with Mike Adamle when Batista comes in, wanting to be #1 contender. Cade says Batista isn’t #1 contender and gets slammed into a wall.

Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane throws him into the corner for a right hand to start before pulling a springboard hurricanrana out of the air. Mysterio slips out but is quickly choked on the rope to stop that just as fast. We take an early break and come back with Mysterio fighting out of a chinlock The elbow misses for Kane and Mysterio hammers away in the corner, only to be sent back first into the post.

Kane stomps him down in the corner but misses a charge, allowing Mysterio to hit the sitout bulldog. Mysterio sends him into the corner and hits the enziguri to set up the 619. That’s cut off with a hard clothesline and Kane stomps away in the corner….for the DQ, as Mysterio manages to survive.

Rating: C. This wasn’t some big epic showdown but it wasn’t supposed to be. What matters is having Mysterio back in the ring so he can fight back against Kane, though he’s probably going to need some help. For now though, it’s the start of what will likely be a bigger story, as WWE would never pull the plug on Kane being a monster or anything.

Post match Kane stays on Mysterio until Evan Bourne runs in for the save.

Dolph Ziggler introduces himself to Chris Jericho and Lance Cade but only gets a handshake from the latter.

Here are Jericho and Cade in the arena for the announcement of the next #1 contender. Jericho talks about how neither JBL nor Batista are worthy of a title shot, so they should face off at No Mercy and he gets the winner immediately thereafter. That’s two matches for one of them but that’s how he won the title at Unforgiven. Cue Mike Adamle to say he thinks that’s fair and they will have a #1 contenders match and will face the champion in the future.

Jericho asks what he means by “the champion” because he’ll be the champion. Actually hang on though, as there is someone else who has pitched a title shot, which he will receive at No Mercy. Cue Shawn Michaels, who says they have fought in a variety of matches, so what else can they do to each other? There is one more that he can do and it will allow him to hurt Jericho and win the title. He asks some people to help him out so they bring in a ladder, with Michaels climbing up to make the match official to end the show. Yeah I’d say that works.

Overall Rating: C+. The whole point of this show was setting up a title match at No Mercy and while Michaels was the fairly obvious pick, they did a nice job of setting him up as something of a surprise at the end. Throwing in the ladder matkes it even better and it should be a heck of a match. The rest of the show was the hit and miss stuff you expect from Raw, but the cage match and closing segments made it work well enough.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 8, 2008
Location: Allen County War Memorial Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Unforgiven and the big story on the Raw side is that Chris Jericho jumped into the Scramble match but also won the World Title. That isn’t going to sit well with a lot of people, including Shawn Michaels, who beat him last night. CM Punk never made it into the match as Randy Orton kicked him in the head, which is going to require some revenge. Let’s get to it.

Here is Unforgiven if you need a recap.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going and he is rather pleased with himself. Last night, he faced a hypocrite named Shawn Michaels. Jericho takes his shirt off to show what Michaels did to him last night. It makes Michaels a hypocrite to have whipped Jericho like a dog and the people loved every second. What did Michaels even win though? It was an unsanctioned match so Michaels won nothing, but Jericho won something.

Last night, Jericho could barely stand up but he took CM Punk’s place and won the title. Batista was so close to winning the title but Jericho outsmarted him. Cue Mike Adamle, who says that Jericho stepped up to the plate last night, but Punk didn’t lose the title either. Punk isn’t here tonight, but he’ll get his rematch for the title next week in a cage. As for tonight, Jericho can face Batista.

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James

James is challenging and Candice Michelle is at ringside. Phoenix wastes no time in taking her outside for a ram into the post before working on the arm back inside. A lifting armbar is countered though as James sits on Phoenix’s shoulders, followed by a neckbreaker. The Thesz press lets James hammer away but they seem to mistime something in the corner. Phoenix grabs a quick Alabama slam to retain.

Rating: C. There is only so much that can be done here, as they didn’t have much time. Phoenix using something other than a Glam Slam for the win was a nice change of pace though, as it gave a bit of a surprise. James losing clean isn’t a good sign though, as there isn’t much of a shot for her to get the title back anytime soon.

Phoenix and Michelle stare each other down post match.

Layla and Jamie Noble are in the back, with Noble begging her to be in his corner tonight. Layla calls that a surprise but he has a real surprise for her: Jillian Hall singing “Layla”. That doesn’t go so well, but Layla will be out there anyway. Promises of Olive Garden are made.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Layla is here with Noble. Regal hammers away in the corner to start but gets taken down by a quick headscissors. That doesn’t work for Regal, who knocks him down and drops some knees, which have Layla cringing. Another knee to the head gets two but Noble is back up with a dropkick. That earns him a running knee to the head to give Regal a quick win.

Post match Regal says this kind of thing only happens in fairy tales and then leaves with Layla, who does look back at Noble on the way out.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Charlie Haas

This week, Haas is dressed as….JBL, meaning he’s in the trunk of JBL’s limo. Haas talks about being a big Texas blowhard who loves to hear himself talk. He does JBL’s Texas two step and JBL glares at him rather hard. JBL: “You’ve got to be kidding me.” JBL doesn’t like being disrespected like this and then walks out for the countout.

Post break JBL finds Batista talking to Kelly Kelly, who both find this funny. JBL says he and Batista are both main eventers and Batista should get why this is terrible. Batista says JBL and Charlie Haas have nothing in common, because Haas actually won tonight.

Rey Mysterio says he had to take some time off after Kane attacked him. He’s standing here though because Kane didn’t kill his spirit. Even though he’s always an underdog, he is no one’s victim.

Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne vs. Miz/John Morrison

Bourne and Morrison go into the corner to start before Bourne snaps off an armdrag. Mysterio comes in to stay on the arm but Morrison kicks him down to take over. It’s off to Miz to work on Mysterio’s right arm (that looks so wrong) until Mysterio fights up and brings Bourne back in.

A top rope Meteora and an assisted moonsault get two on Miz but he knocks Bourne off the top. Morrison’s chinlock slows things down but Bourne manages to send them into each other. The much needed tag brings Mysterio back in to pick the pace back up including a 619 to Morrison. Air Bourne gives Bourne the pin.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with Mysterio giving Bourne a rub in a win. I can’t imagine them being a full time team, but Mysterio giving his approval to any new high flier is a useful tool. Miz and Morrison are the kind of guys who can get their momentum back without much trouble so the loss won’t hurt them.

Post match Kane appears on the Titantron to say he is facing Mysterio next week. Then Mysterio will see why he’s a victim, and Kane holds up his old mask for a weird moment.

Here is Randy Orton for a chat. Orton talks about how bad it is when you have a title in your grasp and have it taken away. He’s not talking about CM Punk, but rather himself. Orton lost his title because of an injury but he earned his shot, while Punk never did. Last night, Orton took Punk out to prevent him from being exposed in the Championship Scramble.

Cue Ted DiBiase, Cody Rhodes and Manu, with Rhodes not liking Orton taking credit for getting rid of Punk. Manu introduces himself for the Raw audience and DiBiase talks about Orton slapping Rhodes last week….and then gets slapped himself. Orton leaves and the young guys aren’t happy.

Manu/Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Kofi Kingston/Cryme Tyme

JTG and Rhodes lock up to start until Rhodes gets in a shot to the ribs. It’s already off to DiBiase, who misses a charge at Kingston. Manu pulls Kingston outside for a cheap shot and a headbutt connects back inside. Rhodes’ abdominal stretch has Kingston in trouble but he fights out, only to miss a crossbody. Kingston knocks Rhodes down though and brings Gaspard in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Manu grabs a belly to back neckbreaker for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was Manu’s Raw debut and…yeah he’s only so interesting. There’s only so much you can get out of this short of a match with so many people around and Manu isn’t that great in the first place. He’s just a generic guy who is there because of his father, which isn’t exactly making him interesting to start. Maybe that can change, but he isn’t off to a great first few steps.

Classics On Demand: Race vs. Flair at Starrcade 1983.

Snitsky vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. We see the Honk-A-Meter, which shows Marella at three weeks, putting him WAY ahead of the Mountie. Snitsky gets distracted by Phoenix to start but comes back with a clothesline. The boot misses in the corner though and Marella gets a rollup for a fast pin.

Kelly Kelly is in Mike Adamle’s office where she’s worried about CM Punk. Adamle says it’s ok but here is Chris Jericho to interrupt. Jericho doesn’t think it’s fair to have him face Batista, but Adamle says Jericho owes him a favor after last week. Adamle needs a main event caliber performance tonight, so the match is on.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Chris Jericho vs. Batista

Non-title and Lance Cade is here with Jericho. Batista starts fast and knocks him down, including the shoulders in the ribs. Jericho gets knocked outside…and here is Mike Adamle to say stop the match. This isn’t fair, so he’s going to even the score a bit.

Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Batista

We’re joined in progress with Jericho getting in a cheap shot from the apron and coming in. Batista fights up but gets knocked right back down, allowing JBL to drop some elbows. It’s back to Jericho, but Batista makes the clothesline comeback. Cade gets on the apron though and the Clothesline From JBL drops Batista, with Jericho stealing the pin.

Rating: C+. This was an interesting twist and I can go with having Batista coming after Jericho. It’s a good choice for a first challenger, even if Shawn Michaels would seem to be the obvious way to go. Then again, if Jericho beat Batista here, maybe they’re just going straight to Michaels vs. Jericho while Batista faces JBL. Again. As their previous matches were just so interesting.

Post match Cade and JBL beat on Batista but he fights back and hits a spear to JBL. Cade gets Batista Bombed and Batista stares at Jericho to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked it for the most part, as thankfully they have combined the best thing going on the show with the World Title scene, which is pretty far overdue. Jericho and Michaels have been doing the best stuff for such a long time now that it’s good to see it as the official top story. The rest of the show was just ok though, with a lot of short matches which didn’t have the chance to do much.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 1, 2008
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before Unforgiven and the big matches are entirely set. The good thing is that this includes the incredible Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho match, which is pretty much carrying the quality side of things. Other than that you have CM Punk ready to defend in the Championship Scramble which is….well it exists. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Killer Kowalski.

Here is the injured Randy Orton for a chat and the hometown fans are happy to see him. Orton confirms that he is not 100% yet but there is something he has to get off his chest. He believes that a brand is only as strong as its champions. When he was on top, Raw was the best thing going but now it’s a joke. Beth Phoenix runs around like a lovesick puppy after the weakest Intercontinental Champion of all time in Santino Marella. Then you have Priceless, who should be called Worthless, because they don’t even have their belts.

Finally though, we have someone who is disgracing the World Title in CM Punk. Four years ago, Punk was wrestling in no name towns but then he won a briefcase and got the World Title. That makes Orton sick and he would love to challenge Punk to get the title back tonight. Cue Punk, who says he is getting a headache from listening to Orton. Not everyone has their daddy and grandfather getting them into WWE.

Punk doesn’t drink, smoke, or go for joy rides on his motorcycle at 3am and make his injury even worse. He’s going to retain the title on Sunday, and then he wants Orton to come tell him how pathetic he is again. Orton says they’ll continue this at a later time and walks away. Cue JBL to interrupt, saying Punk doesn’t get it. Fairy tales aren’t real and the Cinderella run ends on Sunday.

We get the traditional odds explanation and JBL says anyone could take the title from Punk on Sunday. Cue Kane to interrupt, saying that he’s been to H*** and he didn’t see JBL’s Clothesline. He did see Rey Mysterio though, so he’s not likely for the scramble match. Cue Batista to interrupt but he opts to beat everyone else up rather than speaking. Batista walks out rather quickly, leaving the other three laying. I love Punk and I was thrilled when he won the title but egads he could not look much weaker.

Kofi Kingston vs. Charlie Haas

This week’s Haas impression is….John Cena, so the fans are not happy with the fake out. Haas says “the Haas is here and you can’t see me.” Then how do we know you’re here? Kingston starts fast with a monkey flip but Haas knocks him down. The Five Knuckle Shuffle is blocked though and Kingston grabs a Russian legsweep into the Boom Drop. A rollup doesn’t work for Haas and Trouble In Paradise finishes him in a hurry. The Haas impressions are funny enough but if he’s going to lose in short order every time, their charm isn’t likely to last very long.

Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase talk to Randy Orton, who slaps Rhodes in the face. Orton tells them to grow a set because otherwise, he stands by everything he says.

ECW GM Teddy Long, and his assistant Tiffany, are here with Mike Adamle. Their Scramble participants are in a battle royal tonight, which Adamle says is like a Jerry Lawis Labor Day telethon without the kids. Long tries to get his head around that one as Kane comes in to say that Adamle advertising Rey Mysterio was stupid because his body has been destroyed. Adamle was hoping it would make Mysterio show up, so Kane tells him to keep hoping.

Battle Royal

Matt Hardy, Chavo Guerrero, Miz, Finlay, Mark Henry

Henry’s ECW Title isn’t on the line and yeah it’s a five man battle royal. Everyone else goes after Henry to start and that goes nowhere, as Henry shoves them all away. Some double teaming does get Henry off his feet (not a great idea in a battle royal) but Miz goes after Hardy. Guerrero jumps Miz so Henry dumps both of them and we’re already down to three. Henry misses a charge into the corner though and Hardy strikes away but he and Finlay can’t get the elimination. Finlay is tossed but Hardy is back up with the middle rope elbow to the head. The Twist Of Fate is easily blocked though and Henry tosses him for the win.

Rating: D+. What is there to say here? It’s a five man battle royal and only went on for a few minutes. There isn’t much that can be done with a regular match in that amount of time but having such a small field for a battle royal makes it even harder. Henry winning a match that is built for someone like him doesn’t help either, making this quite the weak offering.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Layla is at ringside so Noble can impress her. Regal goes right at him and grabs a full nelson, which is reversed into a rollup for two. A left hand drops Noble and the half and half suplex does it again. Noble is right back up with a small package for the pin out of nowhere and Layla does seem somewhat impressed.

Jillian Hall sings a bit before a six woman tag.

Jillian Hall/Beth Phoenix/Katie Lea Burchill vs. Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle

Phoenix tells Randy Orton to watch and this is Michelle’s big return after a very long injury absence. Burchill and Kelly start things off with Burchill taking her down for two so it’s off to James for a top rope Thesz press. Burchill takes James into the corner though and Hall comes in, only to get forearmed in the face to cut that off fast.

Phoenix grabs a suplex to drop James again though and it’s back to Hall. A neckbreaker gets James out of trouble and Michelle gets to come in and clean house. Michelle tries a high crossbody but Phoenix rolls through and….I have absolutely no idea what the next sequence was supposed to be. They are on different plants for a bit but after about twenty seconds of not being able to do anything right, Michelle small packages her for the pin.

Rating: D+. They got so messed up in the end there, and while it felt like they just messed up to start and then both tried to fix it in a different way, they did at least get the right result. That being said, they didn’t have time to do much here (again) and Michelle coming back to beat the champ after the better part of a year away pretty much just proves Orton right about Phoenix.

We get a long recap of Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho, which is now a personal rivalry over Jericho accidentally (in theory) hitting Michaels’ wife in the face. Michaels was ready to retire, but now it’s time for personal revenge with Michaels angrier than he has been in a long time. This has been the best thing on Raw since it started and now we are ready for one more huge fight between them, which should be outstanding.

Santino Marella vs. D’Lo Brown

Non-title. Hold on though as Marella wants to show that Randy Orton was wrong. Marella orders the HONK-A-METER, which shows that Honky Tonk Man was Intercontinental Champion for 64 weeks. On the other hand, Marella has been the Intercontinental Champion for 2 weeks, putting him 62 weeks back.

That is nothing for Marella, and then he will be the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. I can’t stand Santino but this is still one of those gags that will always make me chuckle. It’s so stupid that it’s funny and that can work so well. Marella drives him into the corner to start but Brown is back up with a running clothesline for two. A Shining Wizard drops Marella but he avoids the Low Down and gets the fast pin.

This week’s classic moment: the first Raw in MSG. Yeah that fits.

Cryme Tyme vs. John Morrison/The Miz

Hold on as Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes run in to jump Cryme Tyme and beat them down. The champs get their belts back and there’s no match.

Post break Rhodes and DiBiase run into Orton, who doesn’t say anything but seems pleased.

WWE is at the Republican National Convention in Minneapolis.

Batista’s game plan for tonight: destroy everyone.

Unforgiven rundown.

Battle Royal

Batista, CM Punk, JBL, Kane

Non-title and it’s somehow even lamer than earlier with a four man battle royal because there’s no Rey Mysterio. There is however Randy Orton, who is watching at ringside. Batista hammers on Kane to start and JBL knocks Punk down in the corner. Some running corner clotheslines have Batista in control but he can’t throw Punk out. Kane boots Batista in the face though and Punk hits a clothesline to get rid of him.

JBL boots the other two out but Punk backdrops him out, leaving us with Punk vs. Kane. Some shots to the face aren’t enough to get rid of Punk so Kane gives him a side slam. Kane knocks him to the apron so Punk tries a springboard, for Kane to grab him by the throat and toss him out for the win.

Rating: D. This felt like something they would do on a Memphis territory house show in front of 200 people when some wrestlers didn’t show up. The match runs about four minutes and nothing really happens, with Orton just sitting there being the, for lack of a better word, highlight. This was rough, but what were the wrestlers supposed to do under these circumstances?

Post match Punk and Orton have a staredown, with Punk hitting him in the face. Cue Rey Mysterio, leaving Kane stunned. Mysterio actually beats Kane down and gives him a 619 around the post.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring for the Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels contract signing. Jericho comes out and Lawler says that WWE is waived of all liabilities before bringing Michaels out as well. Both of them sign and Lawler tries to wrap it up but Jericho cuts him off. Jericho asks why Michaels has this much security, because Jericho isn’t stupid enough to get violent here. Michaels says it’s not his security because he wants it to be the two of them alone. Jericho sends security and Lawler away, which is following Michaels’ advice, which Michaels would never do for him.

This week, Jericho did sit his family down and tell them that he will never be Shawn Michaels. He will never be a lying, cheating, manipulative monster. They will not be watching Unforgiven because he doesn’t want them to see what he’ll be doing. Jericho isn’t going to go soft on Michaels because of Michaels’ precious wife. The only person Michaels has to blame for this is himself.

Michaels is glad that Jericho’s family won’t be watching and neither will Michaels’. He wants to tell them about the time when he almost walked away but came back so he could look evil in the face and spit in its eye. Unforgiven is an appropriate name for the event because he will never forgive Jericho for what he did. All he hopes is that someday God can forgive him for what he’ll do to Jericho.

That makes Jericho stand up so Michaels takes off his jacket but Lance Cade runs in. Michaels takes him out and glares at Jericho to end the show. These two are selling the living heck out of this match and I want to see them tear into each other. You can feel the intensity here and there is nothing else like it in WWE at the moment.

Overall Rating: C-. I hope Jericho and Michaels got a very nice selection of fruit baskets from the roster because they are carrying this show on their backs. The problem here is so much of the rest of the show is built around the Scramble and there is pretty much nothing left to say about it. That makes for a very tedious show and that was on display here. The Michaels/Jericho segments are great, but that’s about it for the show. Well other than the Honk-A-Meter, but that goes without saying.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 18, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 14,957
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Summerslam and the big story is Batista defeated John Cena in one heck of a bragging rights match. That is the kind of match that you do not get to see very often and in theory it should make Batista the #1 contender to the Raw World Title. CM Punk dispatched JBL and is going to need a fresh challenger so let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

Here is a rather serious looking Chris Jericho to get things going. He isn’t here to apologize for what happened to Shawn Michaels’ wife last night because the person who should be apologizing is Shawn himself. Shawn is the person who put her in danger, and here is the proof. We see a long recap of the segment, which capped off with Jericho “accidentally” hitting Shawn’s wife in the face.

Back in the arena, the fans are not exactly pleased with Jericho, who says that Shawn could have just sent in a video or something to make his big announcement. Instead he had to come to the ring and do everything in person, which is why his wife got hurt. All Shawn had to do was admit that Jericho was the reason he’s finished and now look what happened. The reality is Shawn has tarnished his reputation and that is something he is going to have to live with for the rest of his life. Jericho slowly walks out, with commentary not being sure what to make of this. Good stuff here, as Jericho was much more somber and it worked.

Batista vs. Paul Burchill

Batista is coming in with a bad knee. Burchill kicks him in the face to start and Batista actually gets knocked into the corner. A shot to the knee cuts off the comeback attempt but Batista is back with a spear. The spinebuster into the Batista Bomb finishes Burchill quick.

Mike Adamle introduces Primo Colon (Carlito’s brother) as the newest member of the Raw roster but John Cena walks past. Adamle tries to talk to him but Cena walks up to Batista, saying last night was great and the better man won. Batista thanks him for that, but Cena says that was last night. Batista: “All right.”

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall/Katie Lea

Jillian’s song from Chicago doesn’t make the Peacock cut. Mickie drives Jillian into the corner to start and then takes both of them down at once. Kelly comes in with a sunset flip for two as we hear about Kelly’s dating tips in an interview. Katie gets Kelly up in an electric chair so Jillian can come in to pull her down in a crash.

The reverse chinlock has Kelly in trouble and Jillian knocks her down for two. Kelly gets some knees up though and the tag brings Mickie back in for some slightly more sophisticated stuff. A neckbreaker gets two on Katie as Jillian makes the save. Mickie and Kelly hit a double dropkick on Jillian, followed by the MickieDT to finish Katie.

Rating: C+. Better than I was expecting here, which granted is mostly due to Mickie carrying things for the team. Jillian is little more than a gimmick and Katie has already peaked. At the same time you have Kelly, who is getting better but still feels like more of a long term project. Granted it’s a project with some upside so there are worse ideas.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Jamie Noble

Noble strikes away to start and hammers away in the corner, only to get caught with the fall away slam. The slow beating is on until the Clothesline From JBL puts Noble out. JBL won’t cover though and instead hits another Clothesline, followed by another clothesline, which is enough for the stoppage.

Here is Mike Adamle for some announcements. First up, tonight’s main event is CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho. Speaking of the Raw World Title, Shane and Stephanie McMahon have told him to make a new announcement: at Unforgiven, there will be a 20 minute Championship Scramble for the title. There can be multiple falls, but the last person to score one will be the official World Heavyweight Champion. Here are the participants: World Champion CM Punk, Kane, JBL, Batista and John Cena. That’s not bad. Not the concept that is, as that’s a cool idea, but rather Adamle getting through this without any major errors.

John Cena vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase

Non-title. Hold on though as here is Cryme Tyme, who steal the Tag Team Titles and run off. DiBiase looks ready to start but Rhodes comes in instead and we take an early break. Back with Rhodes getting in a cheap shot out of the corner, which is enough for a chase around the ring and a tag off to DiBiase. Back in and DiBiase hammers away, setting up a double suplex for two, followed by a dropkick for the same. Rhodes knocks him to the apron and then into the barricade before it’s back to DiBiase.

Cena’s missed charge into the corner lets DiBiase grab a belly to back suplex, setting up a clothesline for two. Cena tries the comeback but DiBiase grabs the arm so Rhodes can drop him again as the numbers advantage continues. A flying shoulder misses for Cena as well as he just can’t keep anything going. DiBiase snaps off a suplex but tries a second, which Cena reverses into one of his own. That’s enough to start the real comeback, with Cena firing off the shoulders into the Shuffle on Rhodes. DiBiase gets knocked to the floor and the STF finishes Rhodes clean.

Rating: C. Yeah not a fan of the Tag Team Champions losing for the second time in three weeks, especially with Cena out there on his own. It also wasn’t a very entertaining match, as it was mostly Cena selling for over ten minutes before coming back with his usual to win. There was no other team other than the champs to take this loss?

Harley Race is here.

We look at Chris Jericho accidentally (in theory) hitting Shawn Michaels’ wife last night.

Last night, Shawn and his wife Rebecca were going to leave the arena but Shawn stopped to say he was going to come home and comfort his family, because she got punched in the face because of him. And then….and then….and I guess that sums it up.

CM Punk says what Chris Jericho did last night was reprehensible but they deal with people like him in Chicago.

Santino Marella vs. D’Lo Brown

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Santino while Kofi Kingston comes out to join commentary. Santino knocks him down for an early two as Kingston wants to know who wears the pants in Glamarella. Brown fights back and hits a quick legdrop but Phoenix gets in the ring to block the Low Down. Brown: “GET TO STEPPIN! I SAID GET TO STEPPIN!” That’s enough for Phoenix to slap Brown in the face for the fast DQ.

Post match Santino goes after Kingston, who knocks him silly with a ram into the announcers’ table.

Classics On Demand: Trish Stratus b. Stacy Keibler in a bikini contest.

Here is Kane to explain why he was carrying around Rey Mysterio’s mask in a bag. He’s been carrying the bag around for a while because it put a smile on his face. Mysterio has not been around for about six weeks, because Kane has never really liked him. Kane calls Mysterio a slithering little slime that hides behind a mask and like a fungus that grows in the marshes of your psyche.

Six weeks ago, he attacked Mysterio but spared his life. Mysterio is alive, but his spirit is broken and dead. We get some evil laughter, which is enough to bring out a limping Batista. The brawl is on but Kane goes after the bag leg and hits a chokeslam to escape. Should be a good hoss fight when we get around to it.

CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title and Jericho has Lance Cade with him. The fans are of course behind Punk and Jericho does not like that. They take their time to start until Punk strikes him down for an early two. Punk cranks on both arms but Jericho slips out, only to miss a charge into the post as we take an early break. Back with Punk getting pulled into a chinlock before Jericho bends his back over the knee. That’s broken up with a kick to the head so Jericho pulls him into an abdominal stretch.

Punk fights out again and grabs his own backbreaker for his own two, followed by the corner clothesline. The bulldog is blocked though and Jericho hits the Lionsault for two. The Walls go on but Punk reverses into a rollup for two and the escape. Jericho slips out of a GTS attempt and grabs the Walls, sending Punk crawling over to the ropes. Another GTS attempt is countered and Jericho goes up, only to get kneed in the face. The super bulldog leaves both of them down but a quick Cade distraction lets Jericho hit the Codebreaker for the win.

Rating: B-. Well of course Punk, who is already seen as an underdog champion, loses in his hometown with the least amount of interference. It’s nice that there is a little something in there to protect Punk, but this felt like WWE was trying to make him look bad in front of his friends and family (who they made clear were there). The match was pretty good, but the result felt like such annoying business as usual from WWE.

Overall Rating: B-. This was mainly about setting up the major players before the Championship Scramble, even with the champion himself losing in the end. The good thing is that covers a lot of ground and eats up a bunch of time on the show, as there wasn’t much good on the undercard. Unforgiven feels like it’s going to be a one match show, but it’s one of those matches with so much in it that the show should work out. Now just get a little something else for some insurance, as a two match card sounds even better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 11, 2008
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before Summerslam and we have new Raw Tag Team Champion as Batista and John Cena won the belts last week. Odds are their reign won’t last long but they already have a match set for Summerslam anyway. Other than that, JBL is the new #1 contender to CM Punk’s World Title so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of John Cena and Batista winning the Tag Team Titles last week, despite not being able to stand each other.

Here is Cena to get things going. Cena talks about how Mike Adamle made a match between himself and Batista at Summerslam for the first time ever. The two of them have never had an issue before, but now they are the Tag Team Champions. Earlier today, Adamle was looking for ideas for Cena and Batista, ranging from a broken glass arm wrestling match to a chili cook off but all you need is the two of them in the ring together.

Cue Batista, with Cena saying they won the titles last week, but tonight they have a rematch against Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase. They have to work together or they’ll both lose, but that isn’t happening at Summerslam. Cena has never admitted this to anyone, but he has spent six years watching Batista be groomed to be the to star and Cena never had that.

Instead, he has spent years going to war to turn critics into believers. They both have impressive resumes, but they have never answered the question of who is better. We’ll answer that question at Summerslam and it’s going to be Cena. Batista says he’s been watching Cena as well and compares their resume. He has watched Cena get booed out of the building but Cena never changed a thing.

Batista would never do some of those things, but there are a bunch of people over the age of 15 who want to see him beat Cena senseless. On Sunday, he’s going to prove he’s the better man. A rather intense handshake wraps it up. This is a match that writes itself but they’ve done a great job of making it more interesting.

Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Santino Marella is on commentary. Beth powers her into the corner to start but gets slapped in the face. That doesn’t go well for Kelly, who gets taken down and then faceplanted for her efforts. As Santino drops the name “Glamarella” for his relationship with Beth, Kelly slips out of a gorilla press and gets two off a rollup. Not that it matters as the Glam Slam finishes for Beth in a hurry.

Post match Santino comes in to say he wants to send a message to Mickie James and Kofi Kingston by having Beth beat Kelly up again. Kingston and James run in for the save to clear the villains out…but Santino wants to face James right now. See, he needs practice on figuring out where he can put his hands while facing a woman. Kingston says he’ll do it, but Santino says “don’t be a girl”. It turns out those are fighting words so James is in. Santino promises to put her back in the kitchen where she belongs.

Santino Marella vs. Mickie James

We’re joined in progress after a break, apparently with Santino having insulted James’ parents during the break. James’ headlock doesn’t work very well but she’s able to headscissor her way out of Santino’s version. James trips him down and rides him a bit (spanking included of course) but Santino gets in a slam. The knee drop misses but Santino distracts the referee, allowing Beth Phoenix to get in a cheap shot. Kofi Kingston protests, only for Santino to grab a rollup with tights for the pin.

Mike Adamle is talking to Todd Phillips when Kane comes in. Adamle has an idea for him tonight: a match with Chris Jericho. Works for Kane, but Adamle also wants the bag that Kane has been holding. Kane says Adamle doesn’t want to do that, but Adamle says we don’t want kids going back to school and carrying a bag like his. Kane calls this a huge mistake before leaving. Fair enough, but the mistake was made by having Adamle talk this much in the first place.

We look at a classic clip of the Valiant Brothers losing the World Tag Team Titles to Ivan Putski and Tito Santana.

Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase talk about Batista and John Cena not being a team, meaning they’ll lose the titles back tonight. They’re young, but they’re further along than any Hall Of Famer was at this point. Maybe next year they’ll be facing off in the main event of Summerslam, but the difference is they really respect each other.

Cryme Tyme vs. Highlanders

Cole calls this a very important match, showing that Cole is either a liar or a moron. Gaspard powers Rory around to start but a cheap shot lets the Highlanders take over on JTG. Rory starts in on JTG’s arm but a hammerlock is broken up. It’s back to Shad to clothesline Robbie and a delayed suplex sets up an STO for the fast pin. Cryme Tyme moving into the title picture wouldn’t be a bad idea.

Randy Orton has been involved in a motorcycle accident and is hurt all over again. And the delays continue. Maybe we can get some RNN Breaking News about him going forward though.

Here is JBL with a special challenge for CM Punk, who comes out before anything can be said. JBL goes into his usual insults about Punk, who finally cuts him off to say he’s tired of hearing the same things since he’s won this title. No he isn’t your traditional champion but he’s watched every Summerslam since he was a kid and it’s going to be a dream come true to beat JBL at that show.

Punk says that with all due respect to Batista and John Cena, this is the real main event. JBL is incensed that Punk would compare himself to stars like Cena and Batista. He asks how Punk has earned his place and calls him Cinderella. Midnight strikes on Sunday though because fairy tales aren’t real. Punk has talent, but he also has six days left as champion. JBL rolls up his sleeves (JBL: “Settle down Cinderella.”) and pulls back a sheet revealing a bottle of whiskey. He wants a drinking contest with Mr. Straightedge, which JBL finds boring.

JBL pours Punk a drink, saying he’ll have a chance to win if he takes that one drink. If Punk won’t do it, he won’t be able to win against JBL on Sunday. Punk says JBL doesn’t get it because they’re not the same person. Doing things his way has gotten Punk this far so he’ll pass on the drink. JBL says he didn’t realize Punk brought his soapbox so he’ll toast to Punk instead.

Hold on though as Punk says JBL changed his mind so he’ll do the toast. And the drink is thrown into JBL’s face, setting up the running knee in the corner. I’m not sure what the point of the drinking thing was supposed to be here, but they did a nice job of presenting the differences between them. JBL’s old school stuff is fine, but geez he makes everything he says sound so dull and it’s not helping.

We look at Shawn Michaels’ eye injury, with a decision about his career set for Summerslam.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Lance Cade is here with Jericho, who is ran over and dropkicked to start. Kane powers him out of the corner but misses an elbow. Not that it matters as Kane takes it outside and knocks Jericho around again before heading back inside. Cade’s distraction lets Jericho hit the triangle dropkick and he gets to hammer away a bit.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Kane is back up again with a spinning toss (looked like the side slam to start but he just tossed Jericho instead). Kane misses a charge into the corner but it’s too early for the Walls. Now the side slam can connect, followed by the top rope clothesline…and here is Mike Adamle with a bunch of security. Kane goes over to get the bag though, allowing Jericho to hit the Codebreaker for the pin.

Rating: C+. These two often worked pretty well against each other but it was weird to see a heel vs. heel match between them. Kane losing here is a bit strange as he’s the current monster, but at least he was distracted. That being said, putting Kane in a story with Adamle doesn’t seem like the best idea. Then again, Kane has a history of being in bad stories and he tends to….well sometimes he makes them better.

Post match Adamle says he knows what Kane is talking about, because the “he” Kane has been asking about is Kane himself. Adamle knows Kane has been struggling to find those answers but Kane can lead a normal life by giving Adamle that bag. The fans need to know what is in the bag and, after comparing himself to Ronald Reagan’s “tear down this wall”, Adamle says “give me that bag”.

Kane says there is a mask in the bag and the man who wore it has been scarred and tortured beyond all human recognition. The problem is that it’s not Kane’s mask. Kane opens the bag and pulls out….Rey Mysterio’s mask. Adamle is confused, but that might just be how he normally looks.

William Regal vs. Jamie Noble

Regal pounds away to start and they’re quickly on the floor for a ram into the apron. Back in and Noble knocks him into the corner for a Cannonball. A high crossbody gives Noble two but Regal snaps off a suplex. The running knee finishes Noble quick.

Smackdown Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

We get the results of the poll from earlier, with John Cena being named the bigger star over Batista 73%-27%. Dang that’s a squash.

Raw Tag Team Titles: John Cena/Batista vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase Jr.

Rhodes and DiBiase are challenging and don’t even get an entrance. Batista insists he start but Cena slaps him from the apron to come in instead. Rhodes and DiBiase jump Cena to take over, which lasts all of a few seconds before Cena shoulders his way to freedom. Cena tells Batista that he can’t see him and we take a break. Back with DiBiase holding Cena in a chinlock, which doesn’t last long either as Cena powers up.

DiBiase misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Batista to clean house. The spinebuster hits DiBiase but Batista stops to taunt Cena, who breaks up the Batista Bomb. A cheap shot to the knee cuts Batista off and Rhodes cranks away on the leg. Batista powers up and slaps Cena in the face for a tag, which has Cena glaring at him. The glaring Cena gets rolled up to give DiBiase the pin and the titles back.

Rating: C. The match was pretty slow paced and much like last week was much more about the story than the wrestling. That’s how something like this should have gone as there was no reason for Batista and Cena to keep the titles long term. Cena and Batista want to fight and they have nothing else to worry about, which is the way this should go.

Post match Cena and Batista are ready to fight but have to dispatch Rhodes and DiBiase again. With the villains gone, Cena teases walking out without a fight but that’s just not his nature. Security comes in, gets knocked down, and then cuts off the fight to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. In case it isn’t clear, John Cena vs. Batista is by far the best thing going on with this show. It feels big and it comes off as the most important thing you’re going to be able to see right now. The Kane stuff is more weird than anything else (but it took a good turn here), the mixed tag stuff could be worse, and the Punk vs. JBL stuff is just dull. That leaves Cena and Batista miles ahead of everything else an I want to see those two fight on Sunday. I don’t quite want to see the rest of the show, which is about as hit or miss as you can get.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 28, 2008
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 14,722
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to Summerslam and the end of last week’s show seemed to set up what could be a heck of a big Raw main event. It seems that we are on the way to a showdown between John Cena and Batista, which is the kind of a match that could headline Wrestlemania if given the chance. That should do for Summerslam, but we could be in for a bit of an uneven reaction in Batista’s hometown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of the Batista/John Cena/CM Punk/Kane/JBL situation from last week, leaving us with Batista and Cena squaring off to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Here is John Cena to get things going and he has to acknowledge the mixed reaction. He is now perfect and he has made a mistake, meaning there are consequences to face. Last week, he hit Batista in the mouth and that means there are going to be consequences (I think he said that already.). If Batista would like to come out here, they can settle those consequences right now.

Cue Batista, who says that he saw what happened and they’re cool. They’re cool enough that once Batista defeats CM Punk to win the World Title, Cena is getting the first shot. Cena finds that nice….but Batista has already had his two shots. There are a lot of guys who deserve a shot and Cena isn’t sure Batista is at the top of that list. Batista laughs and says he knows CM Punk can’t beat him and neither can Cena.

That has Cena laughing as well, saying that Batista must be glad to be back home. A match between them should headline Wrestlemania, but what if we did Wrestlemania tonight? Batista likes the sound of that….but here is the returning Shane McMahon to interrupt. He and Stephanie McMahon have selected the new General Manager for tonight’s show, who we will meet later.

The new GM has made a bunch of matches tonight, including CM Punk against a free agent. As for Batista vs. Cena, it won’t be happening tonight, because Cena will be facing JBL and Kane. Oh and he can have Batista as a partner. Shane seemed a bit off here, speaking much more quietly and calmly than usual.

Santino Marella/Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly/D’Lo Brown

Before the match, Santino and Beth argued over who kissed whom last week but agreed to keep this strictly professional. The men start things off, with Santino saying he has this but getting his kick to the ribs blocked. Brown hits him with a rather hard clothesline and then knocks him into the corner off a right hand.

A missed charge lets Santino grab a neckbreaker though but he can’t manage a fireman’s carry. Instead Beth tags herself in and easily lifts Brown for a funny spot. Kelly comes in for some running forearms but Beth knees her down without much trouble. Santino wants in but misses an elbow, which does not sit well with Beth. Instead Santino grabs a rollup for the fast pin and the big celebration.

Post match we get a celebratory…handshake, but neither seem happy with that. Santino puckers up but gets glared at, only to have Beth grab him by the hair for a rather firm kiss of her own.

Shane McMahon looks at a picture of Vince McMahon when JBL interrupts to ask how Vince is doing. Shane ignores the question so JBL moves on to asking about the World Title. That’s something JBL needs to take up with the GM, but his question about Kane is cut off by a phone call from the new GM (and yes the ringtone is Shane’s theme song).

Raw Tag Team Titles: Jim Duggan/Jerry Lawler vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./Cody Rhodes

DiBiase and Rhodes are defending and Lawler comes out from the entrance rather than just getting up from commentary. Actually hold on though as the new General Manager has sent in a notice saying that Lawler will not be teaming up with Duggan, but there is a replacement.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Michael Cole/Jerry Lawler vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./Cody Rhodes

DiBiase and Rhodes are still defending and Cole is less than happy. After a break, Cole is on the apron (meaning no commentary, which is always weird) and Lawler naturally tells him that he’s going to do this on his own. DiBiase starts for the team and backs Lawler into the corner for a surprisingly clean break. It works so well that DiBiase does it again, but this time Lawler slaps him in the face to pick things up a bit.

DiBiase runs him over and hammers away before handing it off to Rhodes, who gets slapped as well. Lawler hammers Rhodes down in the corner but a middle rope dropkick gets Rhodes out of trouble. We hit the armbar but Lawler fights up and slugs away, as he is known to do. It’s way too early for the piledriver though and Lawler is sent into the corner…where Cole makes contact and that’s a tag. Rhodes sends Lawler outside so Cole actually hits him in the face, much to the fans’ delight. A hard clothesline retains the title.

Rating: C. This was much more of an angle than a match and that’s ok for something like this one. The new GM is apparently quite the villain, which should make for a bigger deal later tonight. If nothing else, DiBiase and Rhodes looked like the biggest villains in the world here, which is a good sign and better than they would have gotten out of Lawler and Duggan.

Post break Mike Adamle has taken over for Cole. Adamle says he was told to be here this week, suggesting that the GM had this planned in advance.

Here is Jamie Noble, with Layla, to say the new GM needs to pay attention to him. He wants to show off for Layla and prove that he’s the next Intercontinental Champion, so “Coffee” Kingston needs to get out here right now.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jamie Noble

Non-title. Noble hammers away to start and slams him down for two. Kofi is back up with the assortment of kicks into the Boom Drop, setting up a middle rope crossbody. Noble tries a fireman’s carry but gets caught with the spinning kick to the head to give Kingston the fast pin.

CM Punk vs. ???

Non-title, JBL is on commentary, and it’s……the returning William Regal, who is back from a Wellness suspension. Regal (in a sleeveless vest for a weird visual) grabs a headlock to start and takes Punk down. They go to the mat and Punk is rather overmatched. A jawbreaker gets Punk out of trouble and a leg lariat puts Regal down. Some knees in the corner just annoy Regal though and he hammers away, setting up a kick to the head against the post.

Back in and Punk (bleeding from the nose) gets taken down with Regal grinding a forearm into the jaw. Regal slowly forearms away and grabs a half nelson, which isn’t something you often see. Punk fights up and kicks away, including a hard one upside the head for two. A hard half nelson suplex drops Punk again, only to have him come back with the GTS for the fast pin.

Rating: B-. They were beating each other up out there and it was a fun match to see, even if it didn’t last long. You can imagine Punk being rather happy with getting to work with a veteran like Regal, who was probably happy to be back period. It was a nice return for Regal, who is always nice to have around.

Post match JBL gets in the ring so Punk is waiting on him, only for Kane to come out and drop JBL. Punk goes after Kane and gets taken down by JBL, who seems to come to an understanding with Kane.

Here are Chris Jericho and Lance Cade, for what is described as the final Highlight Reel. Jericho, in a suit, talks about how he has done something none of the fans here have done as he grew up. For years, he was seen as an entertainer and a party host for the new millennium. That is what he thought the fans wanted so he went along with it and even hosted his own talk show.

It was a pathetic mistake to pander to the fans and he was wrong to go that way. He will never settle for what the fans want again so tonight, the Highlight Reel is over. Before we go though, Jericho has a special tribute to a man whose career he personally ended. It’s not Shawn Michaels though, but rather Y2J. We see some clips of Jericho’s less than serious moments (a lot of which involves being mean to Stephanie McMahon) before Jericho asks if the fans miss that guy.

That footage embarrasses Jericho because he could have done that forever but no one would have ever respected him like Shawn Michaels. That made him realize he had to do something about it so he has given Michaels such a beating that he is gone forever. When he hurt Michaels, he hurt every one of the fans. Cade says he appreciates Jericho for taking him under his wing and saving him.

Jericho appreciates him as well, just like he appreciates how hard it is for Michaels to try to watch this show. He wants Michaels to listen to him for the first time ever: stay home and move on with your life. Enjoy life away from wrestling and move on, just like Jericho has. Speaking of which, he wants the Summerslam title match too. This was the really good evil Jericho and he has me wanting to see Michaels come back and get his revenge. Great stuff here.

Jim Ross joins commentary and has to correct Adamle from saying Survivor Series tickets will be on sale, because they will be “available”. That is a Vince line if I’ve ever heard one.

Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall

Non-title and Mickie’s dad is in the front row. Mickie starts fast and tries the hurricanrana but gets faceplanted for her efforts. Hall’s running flipping faceplant sets up something like a dragon sleeper, followed by some screeching. JR critiques Adamle’s move calling as Mickie fights back with a Thesz press and slugs away. The MickieDT finishes Hall rather quickly.

Post match Mickie goes to hug her dad but gets jumped by Katie Lea Burchill. Paul Burchill comes out as Katie says they’ll both be champions soon.

Todd Grisham can’t get Shane McMahon to reveal the GM, but whoever it is, they’re already here.

Summerslam rundown.

Jenny McCarthy still doesn’t like autism. Various celebrities agree.

Cryme Tyme have John Cena’s back for the main event but Batista comes in. Cena says he has this so Cryme Tyme leaves, with Batista telling Cena to stay out of his way. Then they aren’t sure who should go to the ring first.

Batista/John Cena vs. Kane/John Bradshaw Layfield

Cena and JBL start things off with JBL hammering him down to limited avail. Cena is right back with the Throwback for one and Batista tags himself in as JR is trying to figure out why he’s on the show this week. JBL’s forearm to the back doesn’t get him very far as Batista plants him with a powerslam. Kane makes the save so the villains are cleared out, leaving Batista and Cena to glare at each other as we take a break.

Back with JBL grabbing a swinging neckbreaker to put Cena down and handing it off to Kane. A basement dropkick and slam give Kane two each and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up so it’s back to JBL, who knocks Cena into the corner again. Cena fights up again (he does that a lot) and double clotheslines Kane down. The big tag brings in Batista to clean house including the spinebuster to JBL (Batista was polite enough to say “SPINEBUSTER” before he did it).

A low bridge takes Batista down though and Kane gets to come back in for a kick to the ribs. Kane stays on said ribs with a bodyscissors before it’s back to JBL to hammer away in the corner. Batista gets up again and spears JBL, who is right back with a big boot. Unfortunately JBL is also back with a right hand that hits Kane by mistake, meaning it’s time for some stalking. Cena uses the distraction to tag himself in and hit the AA to finish Kane.

Rating: C+. This got some time and felt like a big main event, though there is only so much interest in Batista and Cena as partners when they are likely to be fighting each other in a few weeks. Other than that you have Kane and JBL who are….well they’re not that interesting. There isn’t a big time heel at the moment and odds are that is going to be the GM, which doesn’t have the best track record.

Post match Shane McMahon comes out to announce that the new General Manager is….Mike Adamle. The fans are stunned into silence and it’s made even worse as he announces Cena vs. Batista for Summerslam. The staredown gets almost no reaction as the fans are stunned by the announcement to end the show. If that’s the best they’ve got, this show is in BIG trouble because the silence was almost scary after that announcement.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t a very good show in the first place and then it was made even worse by that terrible reveal at the end. I’m not sure how the best choice is the third show’s dorky/dumb announcer, but I don’t see this ending well. Maybe they have something better planned, but possibly the biggest match at Summerslam getting that kind of a reaction is a very telling sign. The rest of the show was hardly much better, with a bunch of lame stuff and nothing worth seeing. Pretty weak show here, and it isn’t giving me much hope going forward either.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.