Money In The Bank 2010 (2026 Edition): You Know How This Works (Includes Full Show)

Money in the Bank 2010
Date: July 18, 2010
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

This was streamed almost a year ago and for me, that’s a pretty fast turnaround. One of the things that often interests me is looking back at a show that I haven’t thought about since maybe two days after it originally aired. This is the inaugural standalone edition of the match, which makes it a bit more interesting as there was already a Money In The Bank match at Wrestlemania. Other than that there’s…well whatever else is on this show. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about what you are willing to risk to have your dreams come true. Makes enough sense.

Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Christian vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Matt Hardy vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Big Show

For the Smackdown briefcase and Kingston is Intercontinental Champion. Striker talks about how Jack Swagger (6’6) has set the precedent for giants winning the briefcase. Cole immediately points out that size means nothing in these matches, cutting Striker off at the knees in the process. It’s a big brawl to start with Rhodes setting up a ladder and trying to go up. That doesn’t work well at all, as Kane and Show break it up and get in a fight of their own. Show gets the better of things and tries to climb…but breaks the rung.

After beating some people up, Show throws the ladder over the top and down onto Kane. Show goes outside to get a different ladder and is promptly beaten down. McIntyre loads up another ladder and sends Christian into it, meaning it’s time to set up the ladder inside. Hardy cuts him off but has to trade saves with Christian. Ziggler goes up top and slugs it out with Christian, who shoves him down.

Hardy breaks that up as well but the two of them have to double DDT Kane. Christian drops Hardy onto a bridged ladder but Hardy fights back and goes up again. That’s broken up as McIntyre pulls him down and sends various people into the post. Kane is back again and loads up the announcers’ table (Lawler makes sure to get his WWE Slurpee out of the way) but opts to grab a ladder instead.

Kingston (hey he’s still in this match) dropkicks the ladder into Kane’s face and then hits Trouble In Paradise to knock McIntyre onto the announcers’ table. The Boom Drop off the ladder drives McIntyre through the table (Striker: “That’s a Money In The Bank moment for Kofi Kingston!” Shut up Striker.) and they’re both down. Ziggler goes up and gets chokeslammed by Show, who then gets in a fight with Kane.

Show knocks him outside and then crushes Hardy and Christian underneath another ladder. That’s enough for Show to go outside and grab a huge, extra thick ladder. The ladder apparently weighs 350lbs so Show….can’t pull it over the top. He finally wakes up and shifts it underneath the top rope to get it inside. That takes way too long though and Rhodes makes the save with a ladder shot to the knee.

Ziggler pulls Rhodes down and goes in the direction of the giant ladder, with Show having none of that. Kingston springboards onto the ladder and tornado DDTs Show down. Rhodes dropkicks Kingston but gets sent crashing into the ladder to leave everyone down. It’s Show up next and climbing the big ladder, with Kane shoving him off and out to the floor. That means it’s time to bury Show underneath a pile of ladders, which is quite the visual.

A bunch of people go up the big ladder (which is big enough for two people to go up one side at a time), with Kane wrecking almost everyone. Ziggler jumps up behind him and grabs a sleeper, earning him a crash onto the pile of ladders (and Show underneath). Kingston is chokeslammed onto the same pile before Kane chases Rhodes up the ramp.

Rhodes is rammed into one of the armored trucks, allowing Kane to go up the ladder again. That’s cut off by Hardy and Christian’s double powerbomb, who get in a fight on top of the ladder. Both of them go crashing down…and McIntyre crawls back inside. He makes the slow climb, only to get chokeslammed by Kane, who gets the briefcase to win at 26:19.

Rating: B. There was a great match in there somewhere but it went on a bit too long and that hurt the whole things a bit. As a result, it was more just a good one, with all kinds of carnage and some big crashes. Show being buried was cool and Kane felt like an unstoppable monster who finally won the thing. I liked it quite a bit, but shave about five to eight minutes off and it’s that much better.

Raw World Champion Sheamus doesn’t want to hear about John Cena and the Nexus. Sheamus has been watching Nexus’ random attacks but he believed he was untouchable. Then on Raw he stared into their eyes and it was like looking at a soulless great white shark. He knows you have to worry about the Nexus, but no, of course he doesn’t respect Cena. Tonight, he’ll give Cena a worse beating than the Nexus did because he’s a bigger threat.

Raw Women’s Title: Eve Torres vs. Alicia Fox

Fox is defending. They fight over a lockup to start until Torres gets some rollups for two each. Torres’ running knee in the corner connects but a tornado DDT is blocked. Fox sends her back first into the apron and then bends said back over her knee. The double arm crank is on to stay on the back but Torres monkey flips her way out. Torres’ back gives out a bit but she’s able to put Fox down, setting up the standing moonsault for two. A kick to the head looks to set up a middle rope Swanton, which hits Fox’s raised knees. The ax kick retains the title at 5:53.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a particularly great match but they had an easy story to follow and it made perfectly simple sense. You could see things going a bit better for the division around this point as the women were certainly getting at least a bit better. We were a long way off from it being great, but this is definitely a better result.

We look at Jack Swagger attacking Kane on Smackdown, with Rey Mysterio making the save and beating up Papa Swagger (as played by Bunkhouse Buck).

Swagger is on the phone with his mom, who isn’t happy with what he did. He finally tells her to shut up and seems to blame his father for what happened. Swagger says his dad got what he deserved for trying to steal the spotlight. He couldn’t risk Kane hurting him and his dad would have done the same thing. Tonight his dad can bask in his glory when he wins the World Title.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Hart Dynasty

The Usos, challenging and with Tamina (while Natalya is with the champs) have only been around for about two months and this is their first feud. Smith and Jey trade waistlocks to start with Smith getting the better of things. Kidd comes in for a hurricanrana but Jey goes with the more classic method of hitting Hart in the face. It’s off to Jimmy (thank goodness for different tights) to stomp away in the corner, followed by Jey’s running Umaga Attack for two.

The chinlock goes on but Smith is up with a backdrop to get out of trouble. Jimmy is right there to cut off the tag though and some stomping gets two. We’re already back to the chinlock, which is broken up just as fast for the tag to Kidd. House is cleaned but Kidd misses a blind tag and gets tossed into a Samoan drop for two. The Superfly Splash hits raised knees and it’s back to Smith for the big shoulder. Tamina’s distraction breaks up the Sharpshooter so Natalya takes her down, meaning the Sharpshooter can retain the titles at 5:53.

Rating: C+. This was a Raw match and pretty much nothing more, making it another case of filler. That’s kind of what happens when you have a pair of eight person matches as you don’t have much else to fill in the card. Unfortunately this isn’t the kind of a match that can be stretched out much longer, as 2010 wasn’t the best time for the tag division (granted that could be said about most of the time for….decades really).

We recap Rey Mysterio defending the Smackdown World Title against Jack Swagger. Mysterio won the title in a four way last month but now he has a torn ligament in his ankle. That’s quite the target for Swagger.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jack Swagger

Mysterio is defending and badly limping on the way to the ring. Swagger goes right for the ankle to start, with Mysterio bailing straight to the ropes every time. An ankle lock attempt is cut off by some kicks to the head but it’s way too early for a 619. Instead Swagger powerslams him into the corner and ties him in the Tree Of Woe. The running shoulder misses though and Swagger bails outside, with Mysterio hitting a top rope seated senton

Back in and Mysterio gets caught on top, setting up a release belly to belly superplex. They head back outside, with Mysterio being sent into the announcers’ table for two back inside. Swagger starts in on the leg but Mysterio gets up, only to dive into…something like a Samoan drop. The running Vader Bomb misses though and Mysterio sends him into the corner for a split legged moonsault and a near fall. The sitout bulldog is countered into a wheelbarrow suplex to drop Mysterio again and a gutwrench powerbomb gets two.

A hurricanrana sends Swagger into the post but Swagger picks him up for a super powerslam. That’s reversed into a tornado DDT for a rather near fall and now the 619 connects. The West Coast Pop is blocked though and the Vader Bomb crushed Mysterio. Another Vader Bomb hits but Swagger would rather go after the leg than cover. The ankle lock goes on but Mysterio loses his boot and grabs a hurricanrana to retain at 10:46.

Rating: C+. So Swagger is done as a main eventer right? His whole thing is working on the ankle and he was fighting a much smaller opponent who had a bad ankle. Not only did he look like an idiot for not covering after hitting his other finisher twice, he then loses at all. The match was fine as a midcard fight, but this really didn’t feel like a World Title match.

Post match Swagger jumps him again and grabs the ankle lock. Cue Kane for the save and he chases Swagger to the back. Mysterio gets back up…and Kane is back with the briefcase. Eh points for a nice fake out.

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending and tries to limp away but gets caught with a chokeslam. A Tombstone gives Kane the pin and the title at 53 seconds.  It’s LONG past the point where Kane got another title so I’ll take it.

Edge is watching in the back when Chris Jericho interrupts. Edge tells him he has eyes in the back of his head and they bicker over Money In The Bank in hushed tones.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Layla vs. Kelly Kelly

Layla is defending and Michelle McCool and Tiffany are here too. To give you an idea of where the title was at this point, Layla’s big issue with Kelly is….she thinks Kelly smells bad. Kelly slaps her into the corner to start but misses a handspring elbow. Layla can’t get very far and is kicked outside, where she ties Kelly’s knee up in the ring skirt. That means Layla can start in on the leg, with McCool getting to laugh at her.

Layla baseball slides Kelly into McCool, who sits on the barricade to pose a bit. Kelly shoves her down and hits the K2 back inside, with McCool putting the foot on the rope. That earns McCool a double clothesline on the floor so Kelly tries a middle rope sunset flip, which is (badly) reversed into a rollup to retain at 3:53.

Rating: D+. This was quite the mess, with the interference either not doing much or feeling like it was just a way to fill in time. That’s on top of Kelly losing clean in the end, which is hardly a way to make her look like important. And again: a title match was set up over someone smelling bad. What more do you need to know here?

We look back at the Smackdown Money In The Bank ladder match and Kane cashing in.

Randy Orton vs. The Miz vs. Mark Henry vs. Ted DiBiase vs. John Morrison vs. Chris Jericho vs. Evan Bourne vs. Edge

Raw Money In The Bank, Miz is US Champion, and DiBiase’s theme music starts with “IT’S A NEW DAY!” Like that would ever catch on in wrestling. Edge throws in a ladder and gets inside for the opening bell before bailing out to the floor. The other seven clear the ring so Edge goes up the ladder with Orton making the save. DiBiase drops Morrison onto a ladder but Bourne cuts him off with a ladder shot.

Miz and Jericho get in a fight, with Miz actually getting the better of things until Henry throws a ladder at both of them. Henry gets knocked outside so Bourne goes up, with Orton making a save this time. The hanging DDT drops Bourne off the ladder but Morrison is back up with a Flying Chuck to Orton. Miz and DiBiase get sent into a ladder bridged in the corner so it’s time for a bunch of people to go up. Henry makes the save and clears out a pair of ladders but gets knocked down as well. With everyone on the floor, Maryse (here with DiBiase) takes off her heels and goes up but Morrison pulls her down.

The distraction lets DiBiase get most of the way up until Morrison makes another save. Miz leans a ladder against the post on the floor as Cole starts singing his praises. Morrison is right there again and uses the ladder to climb up top, where he then rides another ladder to the main ladder to stop Edge.

Unfortunately that lets Edge trap Morrison in the ladder and put another ladder over him but DiBiase is back in. A ladder winds up upside down and we’ve got a big old contraption. For some reason DiBiase dives at Henry, who plants him with a World’s Strongest Slam. Miz gets dropped onto a ladder onto Jericho but Edge and Orton cut Henry off from the climb. Henry is sent outside, where he gives Bourne a World’s Strongest Slam of his own. Edge spears Henry and a bunch of people climb up at once.

DiBiase is laid on a bridged ladder and shoved down to the floor for a heck of a nasty crash. An RKO hits Edge, leaving Edge and Morrison to go up top. Jericho winds up hanging upside down and Bourne hits Air Bourne on Orton. Bourne touches the briefcase but Jericho pulls himself up for the save. Jericho shoves Bourne down for a heck of a crash of his own so Edge goes up at the same time. Edge knocks Jericho into an RKO but gets shoved into the upside down ladder (OUCH). Orton goes up but gets shoved down by Miz, who gets the briefcase for the win at 20:38.

Rating: B. This was a bit shorter than the opener, though it didn’t have quite the same huge feeling as the other either. At the same time, I can absolutely go for Miz winning as you have to give someone new the chance. Despite not being the most popular star, Miz absolutely earned this and he elevated himself through the roster for years to get to this point. It’s a heck of an earned moment and I still love it. Other than that, this had some big, hard hitting spots but it was a pretty run of the mill Money In The Bank ladder match, which isn’t the best result when it’s the third of the year.

Post match Miz grabs the mic and rants about how this validates him because he is a future WWE Champion. This is a heck of a promo and you can tell Miz is happy with showing that he is on this level.

We recap Sheamus defending the Raw World Title against John Cena. Sheamus won the title last month in a four way thanks to the Nexus’ interference. Cena wants Sheamus to help him fight the Nexus, which Sheamus FINALLY did (after running away from them, which may have been smarter). Instead they’ll be fighting for the title in a cage to keep things more even. Sheamus beating Cena to win his first World Title, over Cena, has been mentioned a few times as well.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging in a cage. Sheamus wins the battle over a lockup to start and takes Cena into the corner to stomp away. That’s broken up as Cena takes him down to hammer away but charges into an elbow. Sheamus takes him outside the ropes for a face rake against the cage. Back up and Cena tries the shoulders, only to go flying into the cage. Sheamus tries to go up and gets caught in a superplex for his efforts.

The comeback takes too long though and Sheamus hits a DDT for two. The fans are of course behind Cena (they’re good about that) but a running ax handle to the head cuts them off. It works so well that Sheamus does it again and grabs a sleeper. Cena powers up but Sheamus jumps up for a bodyscissors of all things (Striker: “Nice.”) to bring him back down. They get up again and Cena climbs the corner with Sheamus on his back, only for Sheamus to drop down and sweep the leg.

Sheamus’ climb is cut off with a crash onto the ropes and they’re both down again. Now the running shoulders work a bit better for Cena and they go up top again. Sheamus is sent crashing down…but Cena would rather try, and miss, a super Five Knuckle Shuffle than climb out. We switch things up a bit as Cena is tied up in the ropes and Sheamus climbs over to him. Naturally Cena escapes and makes the save, with a super bulldog getting two. Back up and Sheamus grabs the Irish Curse and they’re both down again.

The Brogue Kick knocks Cena silly but Sheamus makes the brilliant move of climbing then stopping to pick Cena back up. The quick AA gives Cena two and here they come. Cue the Nexus with some bolt cutters to open the cage…but the referee manages to take them away. Another referee pulls the key out of his pocket and throws it into the crowd.

As this is going on, the referee inside gets bumped, meaning Cena’s STF makes Sheamus tap to no one. For reasons of “good guys in wrestling are stupid”, Cena lets go and climbs over the top, where Nexus is waiting on him. That’s enough interference for Sheamus to climb out and retain at 23:01.

Rating: C. This was pretty slow and the problem of Nexus is you’re just sitting there waiting around for them to show up. That doesn’t make for the best match and Sheamus was far from the better star that he would become. It’s not a bad match, but that was a long wait for Nexus to FINALLY get there.

Post match Sheamus sprints into the crowd and runs off. Cena is livid and beats up Michael Tarver before promising to take out every member of the Nexus before storming off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you’ve been around long enough, you know how Money In The Bank shows work. You have two matches getting most of the focus and ring time, with maybe one other match feeling important. The cage match was big enough while Mysterio vs. Swagger was just…nothing. I liked the ladder matches and Kane cashing in was cool, but the ending felt more like a way to set up something for later. Good enough show, but it needed more than just the ladder matches.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – October 6, 2008: What Do We Do Next?

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 6, 2008
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with No Mercy and the big story around here is that Chris Jericho defeated Shawn Michaels in an outstanding ladder match to retain the World Title. That should wrap up their feud for good as we move on to Cyber Sunday. Jericho is going to need a fresh challenger and as luck would have it, Batista became #1 contender last night. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Mercy if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going. Jericho talks about how Mike Adamle will not be here tonight due to a meeting with the McMahons, so Jericho is in charge tonight. He’s still sore from last night and has a banged up tooth, which he has to live with for the rest of his life. Every time he sees that, he will think of Shawn Michaels, which ironically will make him smile. Jericho knows Michaels is here tonight and wants revenge, so tonight Michaels can face Lance Cade, anything goes. Now you have to admit that he is the best in the world, but here is Batista to interrupt.

Batista tells him to pick the number of days until their title match. It could be seven days, fourteen days, or two-day. Jericho doesn’t back down because he knows he could beat Batista, who needs to get out of this ring right now. Batista laughs that off and plants him with a spinebuster. Simple and to the point here and it worked fine.

During the break, Jericho announced that Batista will have to beat JBL again tonight to remain #1 contender. As a bonus, Jericho himself will be guest referee.

Mickie James/Jamie Noble vs. Beth Phoenix/Santino Marella

William Regal and Layla are at ringside. Before the match, Marella says he is trying to become more American, so he has adopted a new NBA team: the Oklahoma City Thunder, which is the recently departed Seattle Super Sonics. Eh it’s one of those classic heel moves that always works.

James elbows Phoenix in the face to start and it’s off to the men, with Noble kicking away in the corner. Everything breaks down and James dropkicks Phoenix out to the floor, leaving Noble to grab a sunset flip for two. We settle back down and Phoenix grabs Noble from the apron, allowing Marella to roll him up for the fast win.

Post match Noble and Regal get in a fight, likely setting up another mixed tag.

Shawn Michaels is tired, sore and in pain and he knows Chris Jericho feels the same. Lance Cade is supposed to take Michaels out but tonight Michaels is going to show that he still has gas in the tank.

Kofi Kingston vs. Ted DiBiase Jr.

Cody Rhodes and Manu are here with DiBiase so here is CM Punk to even things up a bit. Kingston leapfrogs him a few times before hitting a jumping back elbow. DiBiase is right back with a knockdown of his own and we hit the quickly broken chinlock. Back up and Kingston strikes away, including the jumping dropkick. Manu’s distraction doesn’t work though as Kingston knocks him down and gives DiBiase the Russian legsweep. Punk goes after a distraction Rhodes but DiBiase grabs a Million Dollar Dream into a Russian legsweep of his own for the fast win.

Chris Jericho talks to Randy Orton and says tonight, he’s going to work.

Video on John Cena, who is working on getting better after neck surgery.

Kane, Mark Henry and Tony Atlas have no interest in meeting Dolph Ziggler.

Rey Mysterio/Kane vs. Matt Hardy/Rey Mysterio

Tony Atlas is here with the villains. Mysterio slugs away at Kane to start but can’t get very far. Instead he manages to get Kane into the corner so Hardy can help with the mon…well the taller monster, but Kane cuts that off rather quickly. Henry tries to come in but gets taken down by the leg, with Hardy and Mysterio hitting a double dropkick.

We take a break and come back with Hardy in trouble but he gets away for the tag to Mysterio. That means the pace can pick up, including a springboard legdrop to Henry. Kane gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and comes in to stomp away in the corner. Henry’s headbutt drops Mysterio again but Kane misses his top rope clothesline. Hardy comes back in as everything breaks down, with Mysterio hitting a 619 to Kane and Hardy going up top. Henry gets creative by throwing Mysterio at the ropes though, knocking Mysterio into the chokeslam to give Kane the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty run of the mill power vs. speed match here and it worked about as well as usual. If nothing else, it was nice to see a pair of feuds tied together to give us something fresh. Henry is probably coming after Hardy one more time and it’s pretty clear Mysterio vs. Kane isn’t done so this was a nice use of time.

Shawn Michaels vs. Lance Cade

No DQ and Cade actually drops him with an early clothesline. They go outside with Cade hammering him down some more and loading up a table. Michaels gets put through it as this is quite the one sided beating thus far. Cade grabs a chair but Michaels takes him down and hammers away. A chair shot to the head drops Cade and Michaels just unloads on him with the chair for the pin.

Post match Michaels beats on Cade with the chair even more, much to the fans’ delight.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring and announces that the fans will get to face Santino Marella for the Intercontinental Title at Cyber Sunday. You can pick from Roddy Piper, Goldust or the Honky Tonk Man. Throwing Piper in there does offer a bit of a mystery winner, as otherwise this should be Honky Tonk Man in a walk.

Here is the Great Khali to interrupt Lilian Garcia. Runjin Singh says Khali is not happy with Jackass’ Johnny Knoxville (this isn’t where I saw this going). We see a clip from an interview between Knoxville and Khali, with Knoxville asking about the proportions of a certain part of Khali’s anatomy. This results in Khali storming off and then inviting Knoxville to Raw next week. To show that he’s a fun loving guy, we get the Khali Kiss Cam, with Khali kissing Garcia, who isn’t sure what to think.

Here is Jillian Hall to sing some Nirvana, which doesn’t go well.

Jillian Hall vs. Kelly Kelly

Miz and John Morrison and Cryme Tyme are on commentary for a lot of bickering. Kelly gets sent to the apron to start and is knocked outside just as fast. Hall rams her into the apron as Cole cannot get a word in as the other four have not stopped arguing. Back in and Hall throws her down by the hair as commentary is throwing out Chris Jericho related insults. Miz says something about a bowl of chili as Hall works on a backbreaker. Lawler FINALLY gets in a word and talks about Hall beating on Kelly but the argument is right back on. Kelly gets a victory roll for the pin.

Rating: C. Ok, so the match was absolutely nothing, but the commentary was a blast, as it was basically “how long can you guys argue without taking a breath?”. It almost turned into a game as they just kept going and it wound up being really funny. This was totally different than what you usually get around here and it was really fun as a result.

Video on John Cena’s recovery from surgery. The doctor was astounded at how he recovered, including going to the arena the day of the operation. Yeah Cena is not normal.

Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

For the #1 contendership and Chris Jericho is guest referee. Actually hold on as we also have William Regal as guest timekeeper and Randy Orton is guest commentator. Batista powers JBL into the corner to start and runs him over with a shoulder for a rather delayed one. A shinbreaker of all things sets up the Figure Four and JBL reaches for the rope…with a brief touch counting as a break.

JBL is back up to hammer away in the corner and a big clothesline gets (a somewhat slow) two. Batista is back up with a suplex but this time Jericho won’t even count. That earns Jericho a run to the floor, allowing Regal to jump Batista from behind. Back in and JBL grabs a full nelson and then a sleeper, with Batista jawbreaking his way to freedom. The running shoulder in the corner is tripped down by Jericho so Batista hits a spinebuster on JBL. Regal and Orton try to come in and it’s a triple spear to take the villains down. Cue Mike Adamle to send another referee down so the Batista Bomb can give Batista the pin.

Rating: C. I mean, it was better when Vince Russo turned it into a thing, but JBL isn’t quite Mick Foley and while Batista is a big star, he isn’t Austin. At the same time, it didn’t help that they were rushing through things and the villains only interfered so much. It’s a good idea, but they did the Cliff Notes version here and that didn’t quite work.

Post match Adamle says Batista gets his title shot at Cyber Sunday, with the fans getting to pick the guest referee. The choices are Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels or Steve Austin, meaning Jericho knows he’s in trouble to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They set up the big title match at Cyber Sunday and that worked well, though there was only so much to be gained with the stuff they got ready. Jericho vs. Batista is a fresh match, but it’s a pretty big step down from the awesome Jericho vs. Michaels feud. The rest of the show was pretty much the run of the mill stuff Raw has been doing recently, meaning this show was about as mediocre as it gets.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 29, 2008: The Weaker Half

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 29, 2008
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before No Mercy and hopefully that means a lot more from Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. The two of them have done some great stuff lately and are carrying the show on their backs. That’s about all there is going on around here and that can make for a tedious watch. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Batista vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. Before the match, Marella wants the Honk-A-Meter, which shows that he’s 58 weeks behind Honky Tonk Man’s record. He also has the Brain Barometer, which shows he has ten trillion brain cells compared to Batista’s 12. Shoulders in the corner, spinebuster, Batista Bomb finish in less than a minute.

Post match Batista yells at Phoenix but JBL runs in to give him the Clothesline.

Shawn Michaels, who is teaming with a mystery partner tonight, says Chris Jericho has six days left to be World Heavyweight Champion. As for tonight, how about he teams up with a Real American? A Texas Rattlesnake? Or the Best There Is, The Best There Was And The Best There Ever Will Be? Ok Michaels knows that last one is too far so he’ll settle for someone who likes him.

Miz vs. JTG

Their respective partners are here too. After a quick look at the Dirt Sheet, which featured an interview with Cryme Tyme’s “parents”, Miz drives JTG into the corner to start but gets cut off by a flying shoulder. An uppercut staggers Miz again but he’s back with the running corner clothesline. A regular clothesline drops JTG again, though he’s right back with a jumping over the back Fameasser for two. John Morrison offers a distraction so Shad Gaspard cuts him off, which allows Miz to grab the Reality Check for the pin.

Rating: C. Miz is at the point where he just needs reps, as he’s so young in his career. The good thing is that you can see the development coming along each week, as he’s having competent matches. That’s a long way to come in such a short amount of time and his chemistry with Morrison makes it even better.

Jamie Noble goes up to Jillian Hall and insults her singing before asking “sweet cheeks” to be his partner tonight. She sings a no but gets to meet Dolph Ziggler, who doesn’t impress her.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Jamie Noble/???

William Regal and Layla come out to watch and Noble actually has a partner in the form of….Mickie James. Yeah that works. Burchill hammers Noble down to start and hands it off to Katie, who can beat on Noble as well as this is an intergender match. That doesn’t last long as James comes in and gets caught with a double arm crank. James fights up just as quickly and hands it back to Noble, who shouts at Regal before missile dropkicking Burchill. A cross armbreaker gives Noble the fast submission.

Rating: C. The ending was a nice surprise as Noble seems to be turning to the good side. Granted he needs to work on his ability to speak to others but at least the stuff in the ring is working. The cross armbreaker is a good addition, as it certainly looks devastating enough. I can’t imagine he survives the showdown with Regal, but at least Noble is doing something well.

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu find Kane (their partner tonight), with Rhodes saying that since Kane is Paul Bearer’s son, he’s basically a second generation star. That means they can work together, but Kane would rather massacre Rey Mysterio no matter who is on his side. Stay out of his way or he’ll end all of them.

We look back at last week, when Lance Cade beat Shawn Michaels, albeit thanks to a Chris Jericho distraction.

Here is Cade to brag about his win and say that Jericho is just better than Michaels. He doesn’t care who Michaels has as a partner tonight either.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu/Kane vs. CM Punk/Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne

Manu elbows Bourne in the face to start but Bourne slips out of a suplex attempt and brings in Mysterio. Everything breaks down early, with Punk and Kingston hitting stereo dives, followed by another dive from Mysterio as we take an early break. We come back with Bourne fighting out of Rhodes’ chinlock but Manu is in to keep Bourne down. That doesn’t last long though as Bourne is up for the tag off to Punk, who comes in with a clothesline.

Rhodes takes him down to start in on the knee though, with Kane coming in to just stomp on him. DiBiase, who seems to get the idea of a game plan, is back on the leg, followed by Rhodes doing the same. Kane comes in and gets enziguried but boots Mysterio off the apron. It doesn’t make much of a difference though as it’s Kingston getting the tag to start cleaning house. Kingston dives at Kane though and gets caught in the chokeslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic match here but it’s nice to see Kane going into monster mode to win in the end. He knows how to do that style well enough and Kingston is expendable enough to take a loss. That’s the point in putting so many people in this match as it gave them some options for taking the fall and it went well enough.

Here is Mike Adamle for a chat. Earlier tonight, Kane requested something from him and since he won, he gets his request: if Kane wins at No Mercy, Rey Mysterio will have to unmask. This brings out Randy Orton of all people to interrupt and he mocks Adamle for being Shane McMahon’s lackey. Adamle needs to re-suspend CM Punk right now because the reality is Adamle needs Orton on his side. He’s going to wreck everyone when he gets back but here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL complains about losing money on his stock market this week but he has a lot to lose. Then he’ll become #1 contender at No Mercy and move on to win the World Title. Orton is always living in the past because he’s the hottest commodity since ethanol. Cue Batista behind JBL, who realizes what’s waiting on him and turns around to eat the spear (well that was dumb). Batista promises to make JBL’s week worse at No Mercy.

Santino Marella is on the phone and gets nervous when he runs into Beth Phoenix. Apparently it was a sick kid named uh, Frankie! Phoenix doesn’t want him out there with her this week because she’s bad luck. Marella says it’s a good thing he doesn’t have a Moolah Meter, because Phoenix is trailing Moolah by about twenty two years. Phoenix is annoyed and leaves, with Marella thinking it was a “female problem”.

Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall

Phoenix and Michelle start things off but Kelly quickly comes in for a double dropkick. It’s off to Hall, who manages to pull Michelle face first down in the corner. Phoenix’s backbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Hall comes back in and takes too long cartwheeling, allowing Michelle to get her boots up in the corner. It’s back to Kelly for the screaming headscissors as everything breaks down. Kelly’s rollup (how she won last week) is countered into the Glam Slam for the dominant pin.

Rating: C+. They did well enough here as you can tell the women are working hard to improve. It’s still not exactly great, but they’re looking confident in the stuff they’re doing. Phoenix is of course still miles ahead of the other three, but at least she’s getting something a bit better to work with over time. Nice quick match here.

Deuce vs. Great Charli

Runjin Singh is here with Charli, who yells in some mock Punjab about the greatness of…curry. Charli tells Deuce to come at him but the chop doesn’t do much. Instead Deuce knocks him down but dives into a raised boot. Charlie’s wig comes off and a top rope clothesline finishes Deuce quick.

Post match the real Great Khali comes out to wreck Charli.

We hype up the Smackdown move to MyNetworkTV.

No Mercy rundown.

Chris Jericho/Lance Cade vs. Shawn Michaels/???

Before the reveal, Jericho complains about being wished good luck in his match against Michaels at No Mercy because he’s better than Michaels could ever be. We hear about various things Jericho plans on doing to Michaels with the ladder, with Cade using a ladder to demonstrate. After a break, the partner is….HHH. Well who else was it going to be? Funny bit as Michaels runs to the back and comes back out in a DX shirt and hat because he knows his merchandise.

HHH and Jericho start things off with Jericho getting taken down, meaning it’s already off to Cade. That’s fine with HHH, who takes him down in a hurry, allowing the tag to Michaels to go after Jericho. Michaels gets caught in the wrong corner though and Jericho pulls him down into a chinlock. With that not getting him anywhere, Jericho tries and misses the Lionsault, allowing the double tags to HHH and Cade. The spinebuster puts Cade down but Jericho is in with the Codebreaker to HHH. Jericho and Cade beat on Michaels so much that it’s a DQ.

Rating: C+. Well it was going to be this or Cade losing so they didn’t have a ton of options. It’s not like HHH or one of the World Title participants are going to lose less than a week before the pay per view. At least they didn’t let this go long, as there wasn’t much of a point to doing anything beyond what they did here.

Post match Jericho grabs the ladder but HHH is back in with the sledgehammer to Cade so Michaels can splash him off the ladder. DX stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was about getting ready for No Mercy, which, at least on the Raw side, is a one match show. Does anyone really care about Batista vs. JBL for a future title shot? Or pretty much anything else that Raw is offering? There isn’t much you can do to build towards a one match half show but they managed to make it work well enough here. Not a great show, but Jericho and Michaels should be great.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Backlash 2008 (2025 Edition): Sequels Can Be Good!

Backlash 2008
Date: April 27, 2008
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,277
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Tazz, Mike Adamle

It’s the show after Wrestlemania XXIV and that means it’s time to see where things have gone since the biggest show of the year. That should make for a good night, with Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title in a four way. That’s the kind of match that could go in a few directions but hopefully it lives up to what should be a safe amount of hype. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Wrestlemania and everything that has happened since then. Beware the Backlash. That might not be the best tagline, as you probably shouldn’t be scared of the show you’re about to watch.

Commentary welcomes us to the show, including the debuting Mick Foley.

US Title: MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Hardy is challenging after a LONG story between the two, which involved a pizza eating concept. MVP dives after the leg to start fast but Hardy is right back with the threat of a right hand to send MVP outside. Back in and a hiptoss gives Hardy two, followed by an elbow drop for two (with commentary pointing out that it’s more about wearing MVP down than trying to get a win, which makes sense).

Hardy’s headlock doesn’t get him very far so he goes with a middle rope elbow to the back of the head for two instead. MVP hits him in the back though and grabs a belly to back suplex for two. Hardy is able to knock him off the top but a moonsault hits raised knees. A seated abdominal stretch has Hardy in more trouble and MVP pulls him down by the hair for a bonus.

The regular abdominal stretch (naturally holding the rope) stays on Hardy’s ribs, as do a series of elbow drops. A fireman’s carry faceplant only seems to wake Hardy up as he hits a clothesline. The Playmaker is countered into a Side Effect but MVP is able to crotch him on top. MVP goes up with him, with Hardy grabbing a super Side Effect for a delayed two. Back up and MVP catches him in the corner, followed by the running big boot to send Hardy outside. Hardy beats the count so MVP goes back to the ribs. The big boot in the corner misses though and Hardy grabs the Twist Of Fate for the pin at 11:26.

Rating: B. This was the culmination of a long story and what matters the most is that Hardy got the win, just as he should have. The whole point of the thing was that they finally had to have a match where Hardy got the belt. It worked well and was a good match on top of the story, so nice job all around.

Post ads, Matt Hardy talks about how this is the biggest win of his career because he worked so hard to get here. Now, all that matters is that he’s better than MVP.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero, with Bam Neely, is challenging after losing the title to Kane in eight seconds at Wrestlemania. Kane wastes no time in taking him into the corner for the big right hands. A basement dropkick connects but bangs up Kane’s recently tweaked (by Guerrero and company) knee. The knee is fine enough for a charge into the corner but Guerrero sends him face first into the buckle.

Guerrero hammers away and is quickly tossed outside in a heap. Kane sends him into the apron but the top rope clothesline is broken up, with Kane hurting his knee again. The knee is wrapped around the post, which the referee doesn’t seem to mind. Granted he doesn’t see it when Neely does it as well, though I can’t imagine he would approve. Guerrero goes up but gets caught in an electric chair for a heck of a crash to leave them both down.

Back up and one heck of a big boot drops Guerrero, followed by the side slam for two. Now the top rope clothesline (almost a top rope punch) drops Guerrero again but he manages a much needed tornado DDT for two of his own. Guerrero goes after the knee again and the frog splash connects…with Kane catching him by the throat for the chokeslam to retain at 8:49.

Rating: C+. They were working through quite the problem here, as there is only so much you can do with these two. It’s hard to imagine that Guerrero is going to be a major threat to Kane and since Neely was pretty much useless, there wasn’t much that Guerrero could do. Kane wins a straight up match despite having his knee injury and that should move him on towards someone new, as Guerrero has been vanquished.

Sidenote: dang Kane’s theme song was awesome.

Randy Orton knows the rules of the main event and says the Age Of Orton is a reality. Tonight’s reality will be the same when he walks out as the champion.

We get a tale of the tape of Big Show vs. Great Khali. Foley: “Cole what size shoe do you wear?” Cole: “Nine.” Foley: “That’s smaller than the shoe print of the shoes Coach left for me to fill!”

Great Khali vs. Big Show

The cameraman is smart enough to shoot up at them to make the staredown look even bigger. They shove each other to start and then slug it out with Show getting a slight advantage. Some headbutts rock Khali but he’s back with a clothesline to put Show down for the first time. Khali knocks him outside with another clothesline, followed by a boot to the head back inside. Something close to a crossface has Show in trouble and Cole can never remember him tapping out. Well…..other than probably to Cena, he might not have.

Show fights up but can’t get a slam as Khali falls down on top of him. That means a nerve hold (no, you don’t have to ask Khali twice for that one) for a bit, followed by Khali’s big chop for two. Show fights up and now the slam connects for two. Khali knocks him against the rope and tries a chokebomb but Show powers out and hits the chokeslam for the win at 8:06.

Rating: C-. This was never going to be some kind of a mat classic, but at the same time, it also wasn’t a terrible match. Instead it was more just slow and plodding than anything else. The match existed for the sake of having two giants go at it and do their big person stuff. That worked well enough, though it could have been a few minutes shorter.

John Cena talks country music with Jimmy Wang Yang when Randy Orton interrupts. Orton promises that Cena will lose tonight and go home disappointed, just like at Wrestlemania. Cena promises to leave Orton a broken man.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Batista. Michaels retired Ric Flair at Wrestlemania and Batista is unhappy, with Michaels giving the logical response: he gave his best, just like Flair wanted him to. Batista was upset at Michaels for getting rid of Flair because Flair has to be the big focal point. At the same time you have special referee Chris Jericho, who is stirring up some issues, even accusing Michaels of wanting to get rid of Flair.

Shawn Michaels vs. Batista

Chris Jericho is guest referee. JR: “This match has global significance.” Nice try but….come on. Batista misses a shot in the corner and gets punched in the face but the threat of a Batista Bomb sends Michaels scurrying. Back in and Michaels starts kicking at the legs but has to duck a clothesline in the corner. Another ducking doesn’t go so well and Batista gets to stomp away, only for Michaels to use a Ric Flair chop block.

A short armscissors goes on and Michaels cranks away for a good while until Batista does the standard standing counter. Instead of slamming Michaels down though, they crash over the top and out to the floor in quite the heap. Michaels sends the banged up arm into the post and a hammerlock goes on back inside. Batista gets to the rope so Michaels is right back to the bad arm.

An armbar over the ropes keeps Batista in trouble, followed by something close to a Kimura. A Samoan drop breaks Batista out this time and he whips Michaels upside down in the corner. The big running clothesline turns Michaels inside out but he’s able to reverse a Batista Bomb into the crossface. Michaels is smart enough to take him back into the middle of the ring but Batista finally makes the rope. Jericho has to physically break the hold and that is not cool with the fans.

A side slam gives Batista two and Michaels nips up, only to get speared down for two more in a nice sequence. Michaels is able to knock him out of the air and hit the big elbow and Batista is in trouble again. The superkick is countered with a spinebuster and the Batista Bomb is loaded up…but Michaels hurts his knee on the counter. Batista is backed away but goes after Michaels anyway, walking right into the superkick to give Michaels the pin at 15:00.

Rating: B. This was a well put together, logical match as Michaels broke down the machine just enough to stay alive until the ending. The idea here was that Batista wanted to destroy Michaels to get revenge but Michaels is just a better wrestler and knew how to pick him apart by being patient. Well that and then cheating in the end, which is a rather Michaels/Flair thing to do. Michaels throwing in quite a few Flair bits made it even better, though this was just the start of a VERY long story, which would get a lot better. Jericho was only so much of a factor here, but that would change rather soon.

Post match Michaels needs Jericho and another referee to help him out.

Randy Orton comes in to see HHH, who will NOT succeed tonight. HHH says pride comes before the fall.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian/Victoria/Natalya/Layla vs. Ashley Massaro/Cherry/Kelly Kelly/Maria/Michelle McCool/Mickie James

Get them all on the card match. Phoenix shoves McCool down to start and blocks a belly to belly suplex attempt. Melina comes in for a faceplant into a Last Chancery before throwing her down again. McCool manages a basement dropkick and brings the screaming Melina to the corner for the tag off to James. A hurricanrana out of the corner drops Melina, as does a running clothesline. Natalya (in her pay per view debut) comes in and gets neckbreakered down for two as we go over her family tree.

Cherry is knocked off the apron before Victoria comes in for the dancing moonsault. Natalya gets pulled off the apron by Cherry and it’s time for the big brawl at ringside. We settle down to Massaro hurricanranaing Jillian for two before Phoenix comes in for a chinlock. The double chicken wing is broken up and James comes in with a tornado DDT. Victoria drops James with the Widow’s Peak and it’s time for the parade of knockdowns. Phoenix fisherman’s busters Massaro for the pin at 6:30.

Rating: D+. As is so often the case with a match like this, what are they supposed to do? They have about six and a half minutes for twelve women to get in there and do something. You can only get so far with that kind of a situation, especially when Phoenix is the focal point of one of the teams. In other words, cut down the lineup by about half and it’s a lot better.

We recap Edge vs. the Undertaker for the Smackdown World Title. Undertaker took the title from Edge in the main event of Wrestlemania and Edge wants it back. Therefore, he went to a spa with Vickie Guerrero and is promising to get the title back for her. In other words, it’s a pretty basic rematch.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Edge

Undertaker is defending and dang that Big Gold Belt looks perfect on him. We get the Big Match Intros and Undertaker mouths “I’m going to hurt you”, which has Foley going through some flashbacks. Edge gets shoved to the floor to start and it’s already time for a breather. A shoulder drops Edge again and Undertaker slugs away in the corner. Edge tries to fight back and he is promptly launched into the corner for the right hands.

Undertaker starts in on the arm, which is sent into the corner to keep Edge in trouble. They head outside with Edge’s back being sent into various hard object, including Snake Eyes onto the steps. The boot to the head has Edge in more trouble and there’s the apron legdrop. That seems to damage Undertaker’s back though and Edge grabs a bodyscissors to hold him down. Undertaker’s solution, as tends to be his custom, is to punch Edge in the face but Edge is right back on the back.

A baseball slide to said back puts him on the floor and it’s a camel clutch back inside. Undertaker powers up but falls right back down, thankfully sending them to the ropes. Edge tries it again so Undertaker just drops down onto him, which is as effective as you would expect. They trade shots to the face until Undertaker punches him down, followed by Snake Eyes. The big boot and elbow get two but Old School is broken up. Edge goes up but is smart enough to avoid a super Last Ride.

Undertaker slams him down anyway, only to go up (oh dear) and miss a not great looking top rope elbow. Edge goes up again and gets chokeslammed back down for quite the crash. Back up and Edge manages to get a turnbuckle pad off and ram the bad back into the buckle…so here is Curt Hawkins with a belt shot to make it worse. The spear is countered into a DDT so here is Zack Ryder, who is knocked off the apron just as fast. The yet to be named Hell’s Gate retains the title at 18:25.

Rating: B. All of the cheating at the end brought it down a bit as there was only so much to be gained from Edge’s usual bag of tricks. At the same time, it didn’t have quite the same amount of drama as their Wrestlemania classic. As it is, it’s just good, which is still a solid result, even if it’s kind of a letdown. In other words, the first match was excellent and this one not so much.

Post match Undertaker won’t let go until Vickie Guerrero is wheeled out. Undertaker finally lets go and Edge has to be taken out on a stretcher. This would result in Vickie stripping Undertaker of the title the next week on Smackdown.

Randy Orton goes to JBL’s dressing room but runs into Mr. Money In The Bank, CM Punk, who wishes him good luck tonight.

We recap the Raw World Title, which is about Randy Orton trying to convince us that we’re in the Age Of Orton, which isn’t exactly clicking. Tonight, he’s facing three challengers in an attempt to make him feel more like a big deal.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. HHH vs. John Cena

Orton is defending under elimination rules and charges at JBL to start. JBL tries to hammer away but Cena is right back to knock him down. HHH sends Cena outside and Orton is whipped into him for a crash into the announcers’ table. Back in and the villains beat up HHH but he double clotheslines his way out of trouble. HHH sends JBL outside and into the steps but the Pedigree is broken up.

Cena is back in to take over on Orton and the fans are NOT pleased. The top rope Fameasser connects and the STFU goes on, with JBL…realizing that making a save would be kind of dumb so HHH grabs a crossface on JBL instead. Orton goes to the eye to break out and then yells at JBL, only for Cena to knock Orton into him for the break.

Orton actually goes up top and since it’s not 2004, he gets crotched right back down, setting up a Tower Of Doom for two each on Orton and JBL. The release fisherman’s suplex gives Cena two on HHH, who spinebusters him right back. HHH avoids an FU so Cena gives it to JBL instead. The STFU gets rid of JBL at 10:30.

Orton immediately Punts Cena though and we’re down to two at 10:42. So it’s HHH vs. Orton and they stare each other down until HHH grabs a suplex. The knee drop gets two and Orton is tossed outside for the required brawling. HHH is sent into the steps and a catapult sends him over the barricade in a big crash.

Back in and Orton slowly starts stomping away (shocking I know), including the knee drop to the back for two. The chinlock goes on for a good while until HHH fights up, only to get powerslammed back down. The RKO is shoved away though and they’re both down for a bit. They get back up and HHH’s jumping knee drops Orton again, followed by the facebuster for two.

HHH takes him outside and over the announcers’ table for the big crash. That’s not enough so Orton gets dropped onto the steps and they head back inside. The Pedigree is countered and an RKO connects but Orton can’t immediately cover. The VERY delayed cover gets two but a Punt and RKO are both blocked, setting up a Pedigree to give HHH the title back at 28:12.

Rating: B. They kind of followed the Wrestlemania 2000 main event formula here and that’s quite the odd choice as that match wasn’t exactly much to see. Cena and JBL were both knocked out in a hurry and then it was nearly twenty minutes of HHH vs. Orton. I’m fine with HHH getting the title back, but it would be better to have the match actually feel like a four way rather than a singles match with some window dressing. The action was good, but just cut out Cena and JBL if this is what you were going for here.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a solid show with the big matches delivering and only a few of them not being worthwhile. It’s a solid follow up to Wrestlemania as they’re continuing a bunch of the stories while also taking some things into another direction. I liked this more than I was expecting to and it held up on another viewing here so well done.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Survivor Series 2007 (2022 Redo): A Little Top Heavy

Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

It is pretty rare when you have a true one match card but that is what we have here, as Batista is defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker inside the Cell. There might be a few other things going on here, but that has been treated as the be all and end all of the show, as it should be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Survivor Series before we move on to this year’s preview.

ECW World Title: Miz vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and for the sake of sanity, I’ll only refer to him as champion. It’s a brawl to start with Punk getting double teamed down into the corner. Morrison catapults Punk into the corner but he comes out with a middle rope crossbody. Punk knocks Miz to the floor but the springboard clothesline is broken up to put Punk down again. Miz breaks up Punk’s springboard with a shot to the floor though and it’s a camel clutch to Punk.

That means Morrison comes in for the save, setting up a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to drop Punk again. A suplex from the apron gets two on Miz but he is right back with a running corner clothesline. Punk is back in with a hurricanrana to send Morrison into Miz for a powerbomb and a near fall. The running knee in the corner sets up the corner bulldog to give Punk two on Miz and a double underhook backbreaker onto the knee gets the same. Morrison is back up to go after Miz, only to be sent outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Miz and retain.

Rating: C+. Miz and Morrison’s rise continues as the two of them have become rather dependable on ECW, and now elsewhere. It makes sense to give them the Tag Team Titles and now we should be seeing even more of them. This was a good way to get the show going as Punk has to work to retain and Miz and Morrison have come far enough that they didn’t seem like cannon fodder.

We look at MVP turning on Matt Hardy, costing the two of them the Tag Team Titles.

MVP says Matt will not be wrestling tonight because he can’t walk. He is tired of being Matt’s latest crutch and he is better than any of his opponents tonight.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson

One fall to a finish rather than elimination rules. Michelle suplexes Victoria to start and then kicks her in the face for two. Torrie comes in and gets swung into the side slam, only to come back with a suplex. It’s off to Jillian vs. Kelly, with the latter grabbing a rollup for two of her own. Phoenix comes in and plants Maria but a missed charge allows the hot tag to James to clean house. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits the Long Kiss Goodnight to finish Melina.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? It was a bunch of the good women vs. the bad women and there is only so much you’re going to get from a match like that. They didn’t have time to do anything and given some of the skill levels of the women involved, that is not a bad idea. The positive sign is that the women are making progress, but a lot of them still aren’t ready to be in a match like this. Leave this thing to Raw.

William Regal and Coach are ready to see Hornswoggle get crushed by Great Khali.

Randy Orton is ready to disappoint everyone and break the Heart Break Kid.

Shawn Michaels wants revenge. And the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Holly and Rhodes are challenging. Rhodes and Cade start things off with Cade grabbing a hiptoss for some early celebrating. A sunset flip gives Cody one and the headlock goes on. That just earns Cody a backbreaker to cut him off so it’s off to Murdoch for a change. Cody takes him into the corner and it’s Holly coming in to forearm away. The hanging kick to the low abdomen has Cade in trouble and the champs need a breather on the floor.

Back in and it’s an atomic drop into a running boot to Holly’s face as Murdoch takes over again. Cade atomic drops Murdoch into a legdrop on Cody for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. Holly suplexes his way out of trouble but Cade is right there with a clothesline. The second atomic drop/legdrop misses though and it’s Cody coming in to very little reaction to clean house. Everything breaks down and Murdoch Code Reds Cody to retain.

Rating: C-. This would have been fine on any given Raw, meaning it was a pretty disappointing pay per view match. Cade and Murdoch are fine as champions and Rhodes and Holly are getting there as a veteran/rookie team, but they aren’t ready for this kind of a match on pay per view. It was far from bad, but this match was sent out there to die and I think WWE knew that was going to happen.

Team HHH, which is down a man due to Matt Hardy’s knee injury, is ready for Team Umaga. Rey Mysterio talks about being an underdog, but that has never been Kane’s thing. Kane brings up the Katie Vick incident (and goes into details). Then Jeff Hardy reminds HHH of the time he put Jeff in the hospital. HHH: “Uh, my bad.” HHH says this is the night when they can come together and do something terrible, so let’s go do it.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

We get a preview of Batista vs. Undertaker with a look at their Cell match in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Why Batista is wearing a Tag Team Title to the ring isn’t clear.

Vince McMahon sits down with Hornswoggle to explain why he made the match with Great Khali for tonight. Some people think that it is because Vince hates him, but it is really because he wants Hornswoggle to rise up like the McMahons do. Vince has been an underdog against Time Warner and the US government and he won. Now go win against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Shane McMahon comes out to introduce Vince McMahon and then Hornswoggle for some family flavor. We even get an old school explanation of the rules as the fans want Shaquille O’Neal (in the front row) to help Hornswoggle, but Vince grabs the mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want. Hornswoggle kicks the knee and then dropkicks Runjin Singh through the ropes. The green mist sets up some right hands but Khali chases Hornswoggle off. The distraction lets Hornswoggle grab the shillelagh but Vince takes it away. Khali loads up the Vice Grip, only to have Finlay come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say about something like this? The match was a segment instead of anything competitive and that is all it was ever going to be. At the end of the day, the Hornswoggle/Vince story has run out of steam and adding Finlay into the mix isn’t likely to make things that much better. Maybe they can shift things around, but Vince needs to be on to something else.

Post match Finlay destroys Khali with the shillelagh and a low blow, allowing Hornswoggle to escape.

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. Michaels came back in September and went after Orton, who had put him on the shelf. Orton kept getting superkicked but got disqualified last month. Now Michaels wants revenge but can’t use the superkick. If he does, the match is instantly over, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is challenging and we even get a weapons check. Feeling out process with Michaels grabbing a cravate of all things to start. Orton can’t even slam his way out of the cravate but he can drive Shawn into the corner for some right hands. Michaels is right back with a choke on the back before switching to a front facelock as you can feel the anger and hatred here.

Back up and Orton is sent outside, with Shawn hitting an Asai moonsault to take him down. They get back inside with Shawn grabbing a…..wait for it…..Sharpshooter. Orton makes the rope and gets in a poke to the eye, setting up the hanging DDT for two. Shawn fights up and slugs it out, setting up the forearm. More right hands have Orton in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick for two.

Some slams give Michaels a breather and the top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music. That’s a head fake though and they trade some rollups for two each. Michaels grabs a Crossface instead but Orton gets a foot on the rope. The backbreaker cuts Michaels off again but he counters the Punt into an ankle lock of all things. The grapevine goes on in the middle, only to have Orton kick his way to freedom. Michaels’ Figure Four attempt is countered with a kick into the post so he teases the superkick but gets RKOed to retain Orton’s title.

Rating: B. Pretty good here, but the amount of stipulations they had going on made it a little difficult to believe that they were going to change the title here. Shawn not using the superkick at the end looked a bit awkward though and the ending only worked so well. They had a good match otherwise though, which has to be expected when it’s Shawn vs. Orton getting time.

Post match Orton talks trash to Shawn and gets superkicked.

SAVE US!

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker for Batista’s Smackdown World Title. They’ve fought several times this year and Batista finally beat him for the first time last month. Now it’s the big final showdown inside the Cell.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending inside the Cell. They start fast with Batista hitting a hard clothesline but having to elbow his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker punches him into the corner and hits Snake Eyes into the running big boot. The chair is brought in but Batista spears him down. Undertaker’s clothesline gets two this time and they head outside with Undertaker hammering away.

A face rake against the Cell sets up a chair to the throat has Batista in a lot of trouble so Undertaker chairs him in the ribs for two. Old School is countered into a spinebuster (that was cool) for a delayed two and it’s time to slug it out again. Batista’s running powerslam gets two and they head outside with Undertaker getting blasted with a clothesline. Undertaker is fine enough to whip him into the steps and now a chair to the head has Batista busted open.

Old School is broken up again and Batista hits a superplex but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke. Since we’re in the Cell, the rope breaks the hold (erg) and they head outside again. This time Batista hits him in the face with the steps and now Undertaker is busted open too. Back in and a chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is countered into another spinebuster for another near fall.

It’s table time, with Batista tossing him through it for two more. The Batista Bomb onto the steps is countered into a backdrop onto the steps. Undertaker plants him with the chokeslam for two, followed by another onto the steps….and a cameraman breaks it up. That’s because the cameraman is Edge, who cameras Undertaker in the head. A Conchairto on the steps knocks Undertaker silly and Edge puts Batista (who saw nothing) on top to retain.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and it felt like a war, with the Edge interference being a great surprise to give them a back door out of the match. What mattered here is they kept things high impact here, which is exactly what these two do best. Let them go in there and hit all their power stuff until one of them can’t get up, which granted was due to some help in this case. You can all but guarantee the triple threat next month and that is a fresh way to go, so nicely done.

Post match, Edge takes Undertaker down again and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main events carry the show, but there is a really big gap between the top of the card and everything else. Even the third biggest match on the show doesn’t feel that important as the whole show was built around Batista vs. Undertaker. The show was a fun enough watch, but outside of the main event, it doesn’t feel like a lot of this matters in the long run.

 

 

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WWE Vault: More Awesome Battle Royals: They Can Mix It Up

More Awesome Battle Royals
Commentators: Michael Cole, The Miz, Antonio Cesaro, Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Kaitlyn, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred Hayes, Chris Cruise, Larry Zbyszko, Roddy Piper, Jim Ross, Les Thatcher

See there are battle royals, and then there are awesome battle royals, but these are the battle royals that were awesome, but not quite awesome enough to make the original batch. Yeah there isn’t much to say about a set like this, but that’s the case with most battle royals. I have no idea what they can do to fill in nearly two more hours of this stuff but let’s get to it.

From Main Event, December 26, 2012.

Battle Royal

Brodus Clay, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Darren Young, Drew McIntyre, Epico, Great Khali, Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Jinder Mahal, Justin Gabriel, Primo, Santino Marella, Ted DiBiase Jr., Titus O’Neil, Tyson Kidd, Wade Barrett, William Regal, Yoshi Tatsu, Zack Ryder

For a future US Title shot against Antonio Cesaro, on commentary. A bunch of people go after Khali to start so he tosses Tatsu without much trouble. Primo is tossed as commentary discusses battle royal strategy. The Prime Time Players go after Khali, which goes as well as you would expect. Cesaro and Miz argue about their accomplishments, with Miz listing off his rather impressive resume, which would only get bigger.

Things slow WAY down until McIntyre (a good 40lbs lighter than he would later become) is out, but he pulls Kidd out as well. Gabriel and Mahal are out too, triggering a brawl at ringside and a likely tag match. We take a break and come back with Jey Uso being tossed and Regal going out after him. Marella tries to hammer on Epico in the corner but gets sent to the apron. That just lets Marella skin the cat and pull Epico out, leaving Clay and Khali to slug it out. Khali kicks him in the head and tosses him out. Some big chops have O’Neil in trouble and Jimmy Uso is out as well.

More chops have more people in quite the agony as we take another break. We come back with the Prime Time Players circling Khali and they get him on the mat, which is a rather dumb idea in a battle royal, with Cesaro pointing out the idiocy. The Players finally annoy Khali too much so he dumps both of them, plus Rhodes (with a nasty chop) and Sandow.

We’re down to Marella, Ryder, Barrett and Khali, with Marella hitting the Cobra on Barrett. Ryder goes after Barrett but Marella tosses Ryder out. Barrett gets rid of Marella, leaving Barrett and Khali. A big boot puts Khali down and Barrett hammers away but Khali shrugs that and chops him out for the win at 18:16.

Rating: C+. Khali was oddly motivated here and put in more effort than I’ve seen from him…maybe ever really. I love seeing this kind of thing as it’s such a nothing, random battle royal that it made me wonder who was going to win. That’s a nice feeling to have and it didn’t feel anywhere near as long as it came off. Nice job.

From Saturday Night’s Main Event XXIX.

Battle Royal

Hulk Hogan, Jake Roberts, Tanaka, Shawn Michaels, Kato, Earthquake, Jimmy Snuka, Marty Jannetty, Warlord, Mr. Perfect, Haku, Greg Valentine, Tugboat, Jim Duggan, British Bulldog, Hercules, Paul Roma, Big Boss Man, Texas Tornado, Barbarian

It’s a brawl to start with Hogan choking Earthquake in the corner, with Roberts helping him out. Jannetty gets rid of Roman, who knocks Jannetty out as well. We settle down to a bunch of slow fighting, with Perfect being brave enough to go to the middle rope for a right hand to Boss Man. Hogan and Valentine take turns elbowing Perfect in the head as Bulldog is tossed out.

Kato is sent out and Roberts follows him, only to get the snake out and basically bring the match to a screeching halt. We take a break and come back with Tugboat and Hogan slugging out it, which is broken up by Warlord, earning him some praise from fans everywhere. Hogan dumps Warlord and Tornado is tossed as well. Earthquake gets rid of Duggan but gets tossed by Hogan. Kato is eliminated but Tugboat gets rid of Hogan in a surprise.

Hercules and Tugboat are tossed as well and it’s suddenly a midcard match. Boss Man slugs away at Perfect, who dropkicks him into a backdrop from Barbarian for the elimination. Michaels dropkicks Haku out and we’re down to Michaels, Perfect, Valentine and Barbarian. A dropkick staggers Perfect but Michaels is sent out, leaving us with three. Valentine manages to get rid of Barbarian and gives Perfect a heck of a chop. Some elbows let Valentine send Perfect to the apron but Perfect sends him out for the win at 12:31.

Rating: C. As was the case with the other Saturday Night’s Main Event battle royal, the match just DIES when Hogan is eliminated. It doesn’t help that Hogan was eliminated by Tugboat of all people, as that made for a rather pathetic moment. Perfect winning is fine, but this was disappointing to say the least.

From Monday Night Raw, April 22, 2013.

Divas Battle Royal

AJ Lee, Aksana, Naomi, Tamina Snuka, Layla

Yeah five women for a future Divas Title shot. AJ jumps into Tamina’s arms to start and gets kicked in the face for her efforts. Layla (who should be the crowd favorite as we’re in England but receives no reaction because…well look at the match) kicks Aksana out and Naomi/Layla hip attack Tamina. Naomi is out as Kaitlyn jokes about Layla’s gear being flag themed, with Cole trying to avoid various commentary. Layla kicks Tamina out and AJ is still out cold off the superkick. She picks the dead weight AJ up…and AJ tosses her out to win at 3:19.

Rating: D. If you only have five women for a battle royal, just don’t have the battle royal. This was in that weird period for the women where they had some people who were trying but it was still not exactly being taken seriously. Hence a five woman battle royal which lasted about three minutes and featured one of them being laid out for a good while.

From WCW Saturday Night, November 8, 1997.

Lucha Libre Battle Royal

Lizmark Jr., Super Calo, Villano IV, Villano V, Silver King, Hector Garza, El Dandy, Ciclope, La Parka, Halloween, Psychosis, Damien, Juventud Guerrera

Ok then. It’s a brawl to start and Dusty Rhodes is having WAY too much fun with this. Halloween is out and Damien misses a running dropkick in the corner. Lizmark moonsaults onto Damien and Rhodes is THRILLED with El Dandy being involved. The Villanos take over and Psychosis tosses Ciclope for a NASTY crash on the floor. Damien is out and Guerrera punches his way out of a powerbomb from Lizmark. Dandy tosses Lizmark (more like Lizmark tosses himself), sending Dusty into “ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! EL DANDY IS STILL IN THERE!”.

The Villanos are both out at the same time (Rhodes: “They’re kin. They might as well go out together.”) and King is dropkicked out as well. Garza is backdropped out and Dandy gets rid of Calo, only to be kicked out by Parka (Rhodes: “Bless his heart. He did good!”). Guerrera monkey flips Parka and hits a heck of a springboard spinwheel kick. Psychosis gets Guerrera in an electric chair but Parka chairs Guerrera in the back and they’re both out, giving Parka the win at 7:00.

Rating: C+. Dusty Rhodes was the absolute star of this thing as he was having an absolute ball with the match. There are very few things as fun as listening to an energized Dusty Rhodes doing commentary when he gets to have fun and that was on full display here. The match was nothing, but dang the commentary was a blast.

From sometime in the mid to late 80s (possible December 1, 1986 in Fayetteville, North Carolina).

Bunkhouse Stampede

Ricky Morton, Bobby Eaton, Bill Dundee, Jimmy Garvin, Robert Gibson, Jimmy Valiant, Manny Fernandez, Italian Stallion, Krusher Khrushchev, Dennis Condrey, Arn Anderson, Rick Rude, Paul Ellering, Animal, Ivan Koloff, Tim Horner, Bobby Jaggers, Don Kernoodle, Barry Windham

I’m not even going to try to list everyone here as the audio isn’t great and the camera angles miss a bunch of the entrances anyway. It looks like we have about twenty in there but there is no commentary so it’s even more confusing. Some trashcan lids are brought in to make things even more violent though there are only so many elimination attempts. Fernandez and….someone go outside and seem to be out as Animal trashcan lids Koloff.

Horner (I think) is out as the ring is still way too full for much of note to go on. Jaggers is out and so is Khrushchev, who pulls someone with him. There goes Kernoodle as Anderson chokes Morton and Ron Garvin is out. Morton is tossed as the ring is finally clearing out a bit. Morton helps Gibson get rid of Rude, only for Gibson to be eliminated as well. Valiant is out and there goes Jimmy Garvin, followed by Ellering. We’re down to Anderson, Eaton, Animal, Condrey and…I think it’s Barry Windham.

Either way, Animal gets rid of Anderson and Condrey is tossed, followed by who I believe was Windham. That leaves Animal to hit Eaton with some kind of a whip plus a dropkick. Condrey gets in a cheap shot from the floor but Animal fights back and gets rid of Eaton for the win at 12:48.

Rating: C+. You can only get so much out of something like this as it’s just a wild brawl, but that’s the entire point. The idea was something like “come as you are” so a lot of them were in street clothes to make it feel more authentic. Then again there were also a bunch of trashcan lids involved so it could only be so serious. Good, fun brawl here though and a nice hidden surprise.

From Prime Time Wrestling, July 6, 1992.

Battle Royal

Beau Beverly, Blake Beverly, Virgil, Skinner, Koko B. Ware, Kato, Owen Hart, Brian Knobbs, Duane Gill, Jerry Sags, Tito Santana, Texas Tornado, Joe Mato, Tatanka, Jim Brunzell, Bret Hart, Barry Horowitz, Ron Starr, Sgt. Slaughter, Rick Martel, Ted DiBiase, IRS, Bret Johnson, Berzerker, JA Gooden, C. Martinez, Bob Bradley, Bob Knight, Bruce Mitchell, Gary Davis, Joe Holland, Jim Powers, Al Hunter, Scott Palantonio, Barry Hardy, Nick Ganger, British Bulldog

I got at least seven or eight of those jobbers’ names wrong, though they did at least get individual entrances. Berzerker is on the floor and pulls one of the jobbers out and beats him up, leaving Hayes to mock the guy for getting this kind of a match. Various jobbers are tossed out as commentary has no idea who these people are thus far. Berzerker finally gets inside as Powers is tossed out.

We take a break and come back with Martel and Gill being tossed out. Skinner dumps Tatanka and Santana does the same to DiBiase, followed by IRS going out. Owen and Virgil are gone too and the Beverlys and Bret are out as well. There goes Kato as the ring is suddenly FAR less full.

Sags is tossed and we’re down to Skinner, Bulldog, Berzerker, Santana, Ware and Tornado. Ware and Santana are tossed out rather quickly and Skinner actually gets Bulldog out. We’re down to Berzerker, Tornado and Skinner, which is one of the weirdest final groupings I’ve ever seen. Tornado slugs away at both of them but Berzerker comes back for the double elimination and the win at 9:58.

Rating: D+. Yeah not much to this one, with a good chunk of the entrants being jobbers who commentary couldn’t even identify. The idea here was to just have a spectacle of a match and that went well enough. They didn’t do anything special but again, the whole appeal was in having that many people involved at once, which went fine.

From New York City, New York, July 12, 1986.

Battle Royal

Junkyard Dog, Greg Valentine, King Tonga, Jimmy Hart, Billy Jack Haynes, Harley Race, Lanny Poffo, Iron Mike Sharpe, Pedro Morales, Brutus Beefcake, Tony Atlas, Moondog Spot, British Bulldog, Dynamite Kid, SD Jones, Johnny Valiant, Sivi Afi, Moondog Rex, Tony Garea, Big John Studd, Bobby Heenan, King Kong Bundy

A bunch of people go after Studd to get rid of him as Hart hides underneath the ring. Bundy is out as well, followed by Heenan (oh man seeing Heenan and Hart trying to have a match could have been great), who stops to yell on commentary for a bit. There goes Jones, followed by Sharpe and valiant.

Garea is tossed and Race is gone as well to get rid of the rest of the Heenan Family. There goes Afi and the Bulldogs dropkick the Moondogs out, leaving Dog and Haynes to lock up. Beefcake dumps Kid as Hart is still hiding underneath the ring. Morales is out and then Beefcake goes as well, leaving Valentine against five good guys.

Valentine manages to toss Hayes and Tonga, leaving Valentine, Dog, Bulldog, Poffo and Hart underneath the ring. Poffo and Bulldog are both tossed with Dog being sent through the ropes, where he finds Hart hiding. Dog throws Hart back inside and gets in a fight with Valentine. The two of them go over….and Hart wins at 12:57.

Rating: C. Call this one goofy fun, as it was a bunch of people doing their thing until Hart could come in and steal the win like a cowardly heel should. Hart would be able to brag about this for the better part of ever and that’s exactly how it should have been done. I had a good time with this, even if it was just a countdown to the obvious ending.

From WCW Pro, November 18, 1995.

Battle Royal

Dave Sullivan, Nasty Ned, Disco Inferno, Cobra, Mark Starr, Frankie Lancaster, Barrio Brother Ricky, Barrio Brother Fidel, Buddy Lee Parker, James Earl

Why? It’s a standard brawl to start and yes Disco wants to check his hair. They fight around the ropes until Lancaster is gone, followed by Cobra and Starr. A quick series of eliminations leaves us with Parker and Earl (regular partners) to beat on Disco, who fights up and tosses both of them for the win at 5:03. Disco is more annoyed at his hair getting messed up.

Rating: D+. The thing that interests me the most here is how many shows WCW had and kept running for YEARS. Pro went on until 1998 and was basically forgotten unless you happened to catch it at random. Case in point, any match where Disco Inferno is the biggest of the ten stars is not exactly a high level match, but it was a feature here.

From Superstars, February 16, 1991.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Nasty Boys, Power & Glory, Rockers, Legion Of Doom, Demolition, Bushwhackers, Orient Express

For the Wrestlemania Tag Team Title shot and only one member of a team has to be eliminated. They start the usual exchange of punching, with McMahon saying it’s too much action to call. Demolition loads up the Rockers in a double gorilla press but Marty pulls Shawn down in a smart move. A double superkick eliminates Smash and Demolition is out, followed by the Bushwhackers being thrown out.

Marty accidentally knocks Shawn out and we’re down to Power & Glory, the LOD, the Express and the Nasty Boys. Hawk dumps Kato to get rid of the Express and Animal gorilla presses Tanaka out for a bonus. Roma is sent through the ropes so Animal throws him back in (Piper: “No Animal! The other way!”). Hercules throws Roma at Animal, who pulls him out of the air and easily tosses him. We’re down to the Nastys and the LOD…but Roma crotches Hawk on top and dumps him out 6:19.

Rating: C. I’ve seen this one a few times before and it’s one of those ideas that works rather well. I’ll take it over some of the other ways to set up a title match and it was cool to see a bunch of teams getting to mix it up. The LOD were clearly the smashing machines here and it shouldn’t be a surprise that they would be champions in about six months.

From Smoky Mountain Wrestling TV, January 28, 1995.

Battle Royal

This seems to be more of a Royal Rumble with Robert Gibson in at #1 and New Jack in at #2. Jack kicks him in the face to start so Gibson grabs a small package, with commentary pointing out the instincts taking over. Chris Candido is in at #3 and teams up with Jack on Gibson with a string of elbows. Gibson manages to survive in the corner and it’s George South coming in at #4. The slow brawling ensues and it’s Boo Bradley (Balls Mahoney) in at #5 to go straight after Candido and toss him out. Buddy Landel is in at #6 and they start pairing off and Tommy Pitner is in at #7.

We take a break and the Dirty White Boy is in at #8 to chase Landel out and then go after him as well. So that’s two out, with Bryant Anderson in at #9. Anderson grabs an armbar on Bradley until Mustafa Saed (Jack’s partner) is in at #10. Saed and Jack collide for a double elimination as Bradley chills in the corner for a bit. The Wolfman is in at #11 and goes after Bradley, which doesn’t go well. D’Lo Brown is in at #12 and helps toss Gibson.

Scotty McKeever is in at #13 and Anderson is gone. Bradley and Brown are both out and it’s Unabomb (later known as Kane) is in at #14 for a bunch of powerbombs. Unabomb clears the ring and is left alone until Ricky Morton is in at #15. Morton strikes away as well as he can until Eddie Gilbert is in at #16. Gilbert wastes no time in throwing powder in Morton’s eyes for the elimination and apparently Gilbert and Unabomb both win (good for $5000) at 14:35.

Rating: C+. This was the Unabomb show and they clearly knew they had something special with him. He was huge, he could move, and he had a great look. Don’t bother trying to make it any more complicated than that and it should work. The rest of the match had some fun moments, but Unabomb stood out WAY above everyone else. And not just because he’s tall.

Overall Rating: C. Battle royals are hard to do in the first place, but I liked what they did here as it was a nice mixture of stuff. Rather than just having one battle royal after another, this featured different kinds of matches rather than the same wrestlers doing the same battle royals. It’s a set that was well set up and I’ll absolutely take that.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 15, 2008: Nice To Meet You

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2008
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to No Mercy and that means it’s time to start putting the card together. In this case that means figuring out what is coming, though the Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels feud should give you a pretty good idea. First though, Jericho has to get through CM Punk in a steel cage. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The cage is lowered.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending in a cage with pinfall, submission or escape to win. Punk hammers away to start fast and whips Jericho into the corner, allowing Jericho to try a quick escape. That’s immediately cut off so Punk goes up, with Jericho pulling him back down. The running knee and bulldog look to set up the GTS but Jericho makes the rope. Punk is fine enough to send him into the cage and we take a break.

We come back with Jericho holding an ankle lock of all things before switching to the Walls. Punk’s crawl gets his hands and a leg out of the cage but Jericho pulls him back in and slams the door on Punk’s head. The Lionsault hits a raised knee though and Punk kicks him down, only to miss a running knee in the corner.

They fight onto the top of the cage and then crash back down to give Punk two. Jericho sends him into the cage and goes up, with Punk grabbing an electric chair for the big crash back down. Punk goes for the door but Jericho dives at him and winds up on the apron. A headbutt staggers Jericho…and he falls out to retain the title in a bit of a call back to Muraco vs. Snuka.

Rating: B. Good, hard hitting fight here as Jericho escapes again, with Punk basically beating himself. It’s a clever way to keep both of them going, as Punk got his rematch and didn’t so much get beaten as much as Jericho got lucky. At the same time, Jericho gets to move on, likely to his next showdown with Shawn Michaels.

Batista is watching.

Mike Adamle is talking to Kelly Kelly in the back when some annoying guy comes in to introduce himself. Dolph Ziggler or something. With that out of the way, Chris Jericho comes in and Adamle says it’s time to focus on No Mercy. Jericho doesn’t like that and says Adamle needs to take care of him better, even offering to explain it in his office.

Kane is in a mask but explains that he had to remove it. That was for all of the people but it got him nothing. Now people ridicule him and he doesn’t like that. He wants to hurt Rey Mysterio, who doesn’t have the courage to unmask. Everyone wears a mask because they don’t like themselves. When he attacked Mysterio, he was attacking everyone. Evan Bourne comes in and says he wants to see Mysterio beat Kane. That doesn’t seem to bother Kane, who laughs a lot.

Candice Michelle vs. Jillian Hall

Hall sings some Elvis on her way to the ring and after the break, cranking up the shrieking extra high this week. Beth Phoenix is here to watch as well. Michelle grabs a quickly broken headlock to start and is promptly planted hard. Hall pulls on the hair to keep Michelle down and we hit the full nelson. Michelle fights up and jumps over her in the corner, hitting a kind of Edge-O-Matic (nice) for two. The Candywrapper finishes Hall off.

Rating: C-. The Edge-O-Matic was nice and you can see that Michelle is trying, but it’s still only getting her so far. I’ll certainly take someone at least trying to get better though and Michelle is doing just that, which is partially why she’s getting the attention. WWE is trying to find someone new for the women’s division so they might as well try it with Michelle.

Post match Phoenix comes after Michelle and gets dropkicked.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Tommy Dreamer

JBL slams him down and drops an elbow, followed by a big boot. Dreamer gets a boot of his own up in the corner and grabs a neckbreaker, only to walk into the Clothesline From JBL for the fast pin.

Post match JBL says he isn’t leaving the ring until he talks to Mike Adamle. Post break JBL is still waiting and explaining that he should be #1 contender but gets Randy Orton instead. Orton talks about his recent champions evaluation, which is why he cost CM Punk the World Title. JBL isn’t much of an upgrade, though Orton’s shoulder is almost better and he’s coming for the title. Then there will be a champion on Raw with some credibility…so cue Santino Marella and Beth Phoenix.

Marella mocks Orton for being hurt all the time, just like his dad. On the other hand, Marella’s father is always healthy! Except for having herpes. Orton: “You expect me to respond to that?” JBL wants an apology from Orton because JBL knocked Batista out cold with one shot last week. Cue Batista to interrupt, quoting Barack Obama to suggest that Phoenix is a pig. Marella says Phoenix squeals but Batista promises to beat all of them up. Marella: “Aren’t you forgetting someone?”

Batista apologizes and offers Phoenix a title shot when he gets the belt back too. Mike Adamle pops up on screen to say he’ll make his official decision on a #1 contender later tonight. Batista takes out JBL and Marella but Phoenix slaps him in the face. That earns her a spinebuster onto Marella

In the back, Orton passes Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu, with some glares being exchanged.

Kofi Kingston/Jerry Lawler/Charlie Haas vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu

Haas is Jim Ross this week so naturally he’s fat, talks about football, and pitches barbecue sauce. And yes, the fans are quiet for the dumb joke. Kingston headlocks Manu to start before slipping out of a slam and hitting a dropkick. Rhodes comes in and gets dragged into the corner for the tag to Lawler (the fans still like him), who fires off some dropkicks.

Rhodes knocks him down though and grabs the chinlock, only for Lawler to fight up and bring Haas in for some snap jabs. Everything breaks down and Haas hits a splash as everything breaks down. DiBiase avoids a charge into the corner and the cobra clutch Russian legsweep finishes fast.

Rating: C-. Hey did you know that WWE likes to make fun of Jim Ross every single chance they get? It’s the most one note joke imaginable in this situation and that’s not something you want to see. Well unless you’re Vince McMahon of course, which is why this kept happening. The match was just a way to get Lawler on the show, which was fine, though the fans’ lack of a response to Haas as Ross told you all you needed to know.

Smackdown Rebound.

JBL comes in to see Chris Jericho, who cuts him off and brings up JBL costing him the World Title last year. Jericho brings up the impending stock market crash and brags about being the champion. No, he won’t put a good word in for JBL to get the title shot.

Jamie Noble vs. Paul Burchill

Katie Lea is here with Burchill. Noble stomps him down to start fast but gets uppercutted into the corner. Back up and Noble slingshots into a cross armbreaker for the fast tap.

Post match Layla comes out to apologize for last week. She’s so sorry for taking that long to get away from Noble, because now she has found a man worthy of her. This brings out William Regal, who says Layla wanted nobility rather than Noble.

Lance Cade is meeting with Mike Adamle when Batista comes in, wanting to be #1 contender. Cade says Batista isn’t #1 contender and gets slammed into a wall.

Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane throws him into the corner for a right hand to start before pulling a springboard hurricanrana out of the air. Mysterio slips out but is quickly choked on the rope to stop that just as fast. We take an early break and come back with Mysterio fighting out of a chinlock The elbow misses for Kane and Mysterio hammers away in the corner, only to be sent back first into the post.

Kane stomps him down in the corner but misses a charge, allowing Mysterio to hit the sitout bulldog. Mysterio sends him into the corner and hits the enziguri to set up the 619. That’s cut off with a hard clothesline and Kane stomps away in the corner….for the DQ, as Mysterio manages to survive.

Rating: C. This wasn’t some big epic showdown but it wasn’t supposed to be. What matters is having Mysterio back in the ring so he can fight back against Kane, though he’s probably going to need some help. For now though, it’s the start of what will likely be a bigger story, as WWE would never pull the plug on Kane being a monster or anything.

Post match Kane stays on Mysterio until Evan Bourne runs in for the save.

Dolph Ziggler introduces himself to Chris Jericho and Lance Cade but only gets a handshake from the latter.

Here are Jericho and Cade in the arena for the announcement of the next #1 contender. Jericho talks about how neither JBL nor Batista are worthy of a title shot, so they should face off at No Mercy and he gets the winner immediately thereafter. That’s two matches for one of them but that’s how he won the title at Unforgiven. Cue Mike Adamle to say he thinks that’s fair and they will have a #1 contenders match and will face the champion in the future.

Jericho asks what he means by “the champion” because he’ll be the champion. Actually hang on though, as there is someone else who has pitched a title shot, which he will receive at No Mercy. Cue Shawn Michaels, who says they have fought in a variety of matches, so what else can they do to each other? There is one more that he can do and it will allow him to hurt Jericho and win the title. He asks some people to help him out so they bring in a ladder, with Michaels climbing up to make the match official to end the show. Yeah I’d say that works.

Overall Rating: C+. The whole point of this show was setting up a title match at No Mercy and while Michaels was the fairly obvious pick, they did a nice job of setting him up as something of a surprise at the end. Throwing in the ladder matkes it even better and it should be a heck of a match. The rest of the show was the hit and miss stuff you expect from Raw, but the cage match and closing segments made it work well enough.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 8, 2008: A Special Combination

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 8, 2008
Location: Allen County War Memorial Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Unforgiven and the big story on the Raw side is that Chris Jericho jumped into the Scramble match but also won the World Title. That isn’t going to sit well with a lot of people, including Shawn Michaels, who beat him last night. CM Punk never made it into the match as Randy Orton kicked him in the head, which is going to require some revenge. Let’s get to it.

Here is Unforgiven if you need a recap.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going and he is rather pleased with himself. Last night, he faced a hypocrite named Shawn Michaels. Jericho takes his shirt off to show what Michaels did to him last night. It makes Michaels a hypocrite to have whipped Jericho like a dog and the people loved every second. What did Michaels even win though? It was an unsanctioned match so Michaels won nothing, but Jericho won something.

Last night, Jericho could barely stand up but he took CM Punk’s place and won the title. Batista was so close to winning the title but Jericho outsmarted him. Cue Mike Adamle, who says that Jericho stepped up to the plate last night, but Punk didn’t lose the title either. Punk isn’t here tonight, but he’ll get his rematch for the title next week in a cage. As for tonight, Jericho can face Batista.

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James

James is challenging and Candice Michelle is at ringside. Phoenix wastes no time in taking her outside for a ram into the post before working on the arm back inside. A lifting armbar is countered though as James sits on Phoenix’s shoulders, followed by a neckbreaker. The Thesz press lets James hammer away but they seem to mistime something in the corner. Phoenix grabs a quick Alabama slam to retain.

Rating: C. There is only so much that can be done here, as they didn’t have much time. Phoenix using something other than a Glam Slam for the win was a nice change of pace though, as it gave a bit of a surprise. James losing clean isn’t a good sign though, as there isn’t much of a shot for her to get the title back anytime soon.

Phoenix and Michelle stare each other down post match.

Layla and Jamie Noble are in the back, with Noble begging her to be in his corner tonight. Layla calls that a surprise but he has a real surprise for her: Jillian Hall singing “Layla”. That doesn’t go so well, but Layla will be out there anyway. Promises of Olive Garden are made.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Layla is here with Noble. Regal hammers away in the corner to start but gets taken down by a quick headscissors. That doesn’t work for Regal, who knocks him down and drops some knees, which have Layla cringing. Another knee to the head gets two but Noble is back up with a dropkick. That earns him a running knee to the head to give Regal a quick win.

Post match Regal says this kind of thing only happens in fairy tales and then leaves with Layla, who does look back at Noble on the way out.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Charlie Haas

This week, Haas is dressed as….JBL, meaning he’s in the trunk of JBL’s limo. Haas talks about being a big Texas blowhard who loves to hear himself talk. He does JBL’s Texas two step and JBL glares at him rather hard. JBL: “You’ve got to be kidding me.” JBL doesn’t like being disrespected like this and then walks out for the countout.

Post break JBL finds Batista talking to Kelly Kelly, who both find this funny. JBL says he and Batista are both main eventers and Batista should get why this is terrible. Batista says JBL and Charlie Haas have nothing in common, because Haas actually won tonight.

Rey Mysterio says he had to take some time off after Kane attacked him. He’s standing here though because Kane didn’t kill his spirit. Even though he’s always an underdog, he is no one’s victim.

Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne vs. Miz/John Morrison

Bourne and Morrison go into the corner to start before Bourne snaps off an armdrag. Mysterio comes in to stay on the arm but Morrison kicks him down to take over. It’s off to Miz to work on Mysterio’s right arm (that looks so wrong) until Mysterio fights up and brings Bourne back in.

A top rope Meteora and an assisted moonsault get two on Miz but he knocks Bourne off the top. Morrison’s chinlock slows things down but Bourne manages to send them into each other. The much needed tag brings Mysterio back in to pick the pace back up including a 619 to Morrison. Air Bourne gives Bourne the pin.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with Mysterio giving Bourne a rub in a win. I can’t imagine them being a full time team, but Mysterio giving his approval to any new high flier is a useful tool. Miz and Morrison are the kind of guys who can get their momentum back without much trouble so the loss won’t hurt them.

Post match Kane appears on the Titantron to say he is facing Mysterio next week. Then Mysterio will see why he’s a victim, and Kane holds up his old mask for a weird moment.

Here is Randy Orton for a chat. Orton talks about how bad it is when you have a title in your grasp and have it taken away. He’s not talking about CM Punk, but rather himself. Orton lost his title because of an injury but he earned his shot, while Punk never did. Last night, Orton took Punk out to prevent him from being exposed in the Championship Scramble.

Cue Ted DiBiase, Cody Rhodes and Manu, with Rhodes not liking Orton taking credit for getting rid of Punk. Manu introduces himself for the Raw audience and DiBiase talks about Orton slapping Rhodes last week….and then gets slapped himself. Orton leaves and the young guys aren’t happy.

Manu/Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Kofi Kingston/Cryme Tyme

JTG and Rhodes lock up to start until Rhodes gets in a shot to the ribs. It’s already off to DiBiase, who misses a charge at Kingston. Manu pulls Kingston outside for a cheap shot and a headbutt connects back inside. Rhodes’ abdominal stretch has Kingston in trouble but he fights out, only to miss a crossbody. Kingston knocks Rhodes down though and brings Gaspard in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Manu grabs a belly to back neckbreaker for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was Manu’s Raw debut and…yeah he’s only so interesting. There’s only so much you can get out of this short of a match with so many people around and Manu isn’t that great in the first place. He’s just a generic guy who is there because of his father, which isn’t exactly making him interesting to start. Maybe that can change, but he isn’t off to a great first few steps.

Classics On Demand: Race vs. Flair at Starrcade 1983.

Snitsky vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. We see the Honk-A-Meter, which shows Marella at three weeks, putting him WAY ahead of the Mountie. Snitsky gets distracted by Phoenix to start but comes back with a clothesline. The boot misses in the corner though and Marella gets a rollup for a fast pin.

Kelly Kelly is in Mike Adamle’s office where she’s worried about CM Punk. Adamle says it’s ok but here is Chris Jericho to interrupt. Jericho doesn’t think it’s fair to have him face Batista, but Adamle says Jericho owes him a favor after last week. Adamle needs a main event caliber performance tonight, so the match is on.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Chris Jericho vs. Batista

Non-title and Lance Cade is here with Jericho. Batista starts fast and knocks him down, including the shoulders in the ribs. Jericho gets knocked outside…and here is Mike Adamle to say stop the match. This isn’t fair, so he’s going to even the score a bit.

Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Batista

We’re joined in progress with Jericho getting in a cheap shot from the apron and coming in. Batista fights up but gets knocked right back down, allowing JBL to drop some elbows. It’s back to Jericho, but Batista makes the clothesline comeback. Cade gets on the apron though and the Clothesline From JBL drops Batista, with Jericho stealing the pin.

Rating: C+. This was an interesting twist and I can go with having Batista coming after Jericho. It’s a good choice for a first challenger, even if Shawn Michaels would seem to be the obvious way to go. Then again, if Jericho beat Batista here, maybe they’re just going straight to Michaels vs. Jericho while Batista faces JBL. Again. As their previous matches were just so interesting.

Post match Cade and JBL beat on Batista but he fights back and hits a spear to JBL. Cade gets Batista Bombed and Batista stares at Jericho to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked it for the most part, as thankfully they have combined the best thing going on the show with the World Title scene, which is pretty far overdue. Jericho and Michaels have been doing the best stuff for such a long time now that it’s good to see it as the official top story. The rest of the show was just ok though, with a lot of short matches which didn’t have the chance to do much.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 1, 2008 (2025 Edition): Fruit Baskets Go Over There

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 1, 2008
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before Unforgiven and the big matches are entirely set. The good thing is that this includes the incredible Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho match, which is pretty much carrying the quality side of things. Other than that you have CM Punk ready to defend in the Championship Scramble which is….well it exists. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Killer Kowalski.

Here is the injured Randy Orton for a chat and the hometown fans are happy to see him. Orton confirms that he is not 100% yet but there is something he has to get off his chest. He believes that a brand is only as strong as its champions. When he was on top, Raw was the best thing going but now it’s a joke. Beth Phoenix runs around like a lovesick puppy after the weakest Intercontinental Champion of all time in Santino Marella. Then you have Priceless, who should be called Worthless, because they don’t even have their belts.

Finally though, we have someone who is disgracing the World Title in CM Punk. Four years ago, Punk was wrestling in no name towns but then he won a briefcase and got the World Title. That makes Orton sick and he would love to challenge Punk to get the title back tonight. Cue Punk, who says he is getting a headache from listening to Orton. Not everyone has their daddy and grandfather getting them into WWE.

Punk doesn’t drink, smoke, or go for joy rides on his motorcycle at 3am and make his injury even worse. He’s going to retain the title on Sunday, and then he wants Orton to come tell him how pathetic he is again. Orton says they’ll continue this at a later time and walks away. Cue JBL to interrupt, saying Punk doesn’t get it. Fairy tales aren’t real and the Cinderella run ends on Sunday.

We get the traditional odds explanation and JBL says anyone could take the title from Punk on Sunday. Cue Kane to interrupt, saying that he’s been to H*** and he didn’t see JBL’s Clothesline. He did see Rey Mysterio though, so he’s not likely for the scramble match. Cue Batista to interrupt but he opts to beat everyone else up rather than speaking. Batista walks out rather quickly, leaving the other three laying. I love Punk and I was thrilled when he won the title but egads he could not look much weaker.

Kofi Kingston vs. Charlie Haas

This week’s Haas impression is….John Cena, so the fans are not happy with the fake out. Haas says “the Haas is here and you can’t see me.” Then how do we know you’re here? Kingston starts fast with a monkey flip but Haas knocks him down. The Five Knuckle Shuffle is blocked though and Kingston grabs a Russian legsweep into the Boom Drop. A rollup doesn’t work for Haas and Trouble In Paradise finishes him in a hurry. The Haas impressions are funny enough but if he’s going to lose in short order every time, their charm isn’t likely to last very long.

Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase talk to Randy Orton, who slaps Rhodes in the face. Orton tells them to grow a set because otherwise, he stands by everything he says.

ECW GM Teddy Long, and his assistant Tiffany, are here with Mike Adamle. Their Scramble participants are in a battle royal tonight, which Adamle says is like a Jerry Lawis Labor Day telethon without the kids. Long tries to get his head around that one as Kane comes in to say that Adamle advertising Rey Mysterio was stupid because his body has been destroyed. Adamle was hoping it would make Mysterio show up, so Kane tells him to keep hoping.

Battle Royal

Matt Hardy, Chavo Guerrero, Miz, Finlay, Mark Henry

Henry’s ECW Title isn’t on the line and yeah it’s a five man battle royal. Everyone else goes after Henry to start and that goes nowhere, as Henry shoves them all away. Some double teaming does get Henry off his feet (not a great idea in a battle royal) but Miz goes after Hardy. Guerrero jumps Miz so Henry dumps both of them and we’re already down to three. Henry misses a charge into the corner though and Hardy strikes away but he and Finlay can’t get the elimination. Finlay is tossed but Hardy is back up with the middle rope elbow to the head. The Twist Of Fate is easily blocked though and Henry tosses him for the win.

Rating: D+. What is there to say here? It’s a five man battle royal and only went on for a few minutes. There isn’t much that can be done with a regular match in that amount of time but having such a small field for a battle royal makes it even harder. Henry winning a match that is built for someone like him doesn’t help either, making this quite the weak offering.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Layla is at ringside so Noble can impress her. Regal goes right at him and grabs a full nelson, which is reversed into a rollup for two. A left hand drops Noble and the half and half suplex does it again. Noble is right back up with a small package for the pin out of nowhere and Layla does seem somewhat impressed.

Jillian Hall sings a bit before a six woman tag.

Jillian Hall/Beth Phoenix/Katie Lea Burchill vs. Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle

Phoenix tells Randy Orton to watch and this is Michelle’s big return after a very long injury absence. Burchill and Kelly start things off with Burchill taking her down for two so it’s off to James for a top rope Thesz press. Burchill takes James into the corner though and Hall comes in, only to get forearmed in the face to cut that off fast.

Phoenix grabs a suplex to drop James again though and it’s back to Hall. A neckbreaker gets James out of trouble and Michelle gets to come in and clean house. Michelle tries a high crossbody but Phoenix rolls through and….I have absolutely no idea what the next sequence was supposed to be. They are on different plants for a bit but after about twenty seconds of not being able to do anything right, Michelle small packages her for the pin.

Rating: D+. They got so messed up in the end there, and while it felt like they just messed up to start and then both tried to fix it in a different way, they did at least get the right result. That being said, they didn’t have time to do much here (again) and Michelle coming back to beat the champ after the better part of a year away pretty much just proves Orton right about Phoenix.

We get a long recap of Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho, which is now a personal rivalry over Jericho accidentally (in theory) hitting Michaels’ wife in the face. Michaels was ready to retire, but now it’s time for personal revenge with Michaels angrier than he has been in a long time. This has been the best thing on Raw since it started and now we are ready for one more huge fight between them, which should be outstanding.

Santino Marella vs. D’Lo Brown

Non-title. Hold on though as Marella wants to show that Randy Orton was wrong. Marella orders the HONK-A-METER, which shows that Honky Tonk Man was Intercontinental Champion for 64 weeks. On the other hand, Marella has been the Intercontinental Champion for 2 weeks, putting him 62 weeks back.

That is nothing for Marella, and then he will be the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. I can’t stand Santino but this is still one of those gags that will always make me chuckle. It’s so stupid that it’s funny and that can work so well. Marella drives him into the corner to start but Brown is back up with a running clothesline for two. A Shining Wizard drops Marella but he avoids the Low Down and gets the fast pin.

This week’s classic moment: the first Raw in MSG. Yeah that fits.

Cryme Tyme vs. John Morrison/The Miz

Hold on as Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes run in to jump Cryme Tyme and beat them down. The champs get their belts back and there’s no match.

Post break Rhodes and DiBiase run into Orton, who doesn’t say anything but seems pleased.

WWE is at the Republican National Convention in Minneapolis.

Batista’s game plan for tonight: destroy everyone.

Unforgiven rundown.

Battle Royal

Batista, CM Punk, JBL, Kane

Non-title and it’s somehow even lamer than earlier with a four man battle royal because there’s no Rey Mysterio. There is however Randy Orton, who is watching at ringside. Batista hammers on Kane to start and JBL knocks Punk down in the corner. Some running corner clotheslines have Batista in control but he can’t throw Punk out. Kane boots Batista in the face though and Punk hits a clothesline to get rid of him.

JBL boots the other two out but Punk backdrops him out, leaving us with Punk vs. Kane. Some shots to the face aren’t enough to get rid of Punk so Kane gives him a side slam. Kane knocks him to the apron so Punk tries a springboard, for Kane to grab him by the throat and toss him out for the win.

Rating: D. This felt like something they would do on a Memphis territory house show in front of 200 people when some wrestlers didn’t show up. The match runs about four minutes and nothing really happens, with Orton just sitting there being the, for lack of a better word, highlight. This was rough, but what were the wrestlers supposed to do under these circumstances?

Post match Punk and Orton have a staredown, with Punk hitting him in the face. Cue Rey Mysterio, leaving Kane stunned. Mysterio actually beats Kane down and gives him a 619 around the post.

Jerry Lawler is in the ring for the Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels contract signing. Jericho comes out and Lawler says that WWE is waived of all liabilities before bringing Michaels out as well. Both of them sign and Lawler tries to wrap it up but Jericho cuts him off. Jericho asks why Michaels has this much security, because Jericho isn’t stupid enough to get violent here. Michaels says it’s not his security because he wants it to be the two of them alone. Jericho sends security and Lawler away, which is following Michaels’ advice, which Michaels would never do for him.

This week, Jericho did sit his family down and tell them that he will never be Shawn Michaels. He will never be a lying, cheating, manipulative monster. They will not be watching Unforgiven because he doesn’t want them to see what he’ll be doing. Jericho isn’t going to go soft on Michaels because of Michaels’ precious wife. The only person Michaels has to blame for this is himself.

Michaels is glad that Jericho’s family won’t be watching and neither will Michaels’. He wants to tell them about the time when he almost walked away but came back so he could look evil in the face and spit in its eye. Unforgiven is an appropriate name for the event because he will never forgive Jericho for what he did. All he hopes is that someday God can forgive him for what he’ll do to Jericho.

That makes Jericho stand up so Michaels takes off his jacket but Lance Cade runs in. Michaels takes him out and glares at Jericho to end the show. These two are selling the living heck out of this match and I want to see them tear into each other. You can feel the intensity here and there is nothing else like it in WWE at the moment.

Overall Rating: C-. I hope Jericho and Michaels got a very nice selection of fruit baskets from the roster because they are carrying this show on their backs. The problem here is so much of the rest of the show is built around the Scramble and there is pretty much nothing left to say about it. That makes for a very tedious show and that was on display here. The Michaels/Jericho segments are great, but that’s about it for the show. Well other than the Honk-A-Meter, but that goes without saying.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – August 4, 2008: Those Two, And Everything Else

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 4, 2008
Location: Thompson-Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

For reasons I still do not want to understand, we’re in the Mike Adamle Era as he is the new GM of the show. Other than that nightmare, we have less than two weeks to go before Summerslam and the real main event from Raw is set as John Cena will face Batista. Other than that, CM Punk still needs an official challenger and we might get that tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick note: I did the Saturday Night’s Main Event but it didn’t save properly and was lost. Normally I would redo it but a grand total of nothing happened on the show and I’m not going to waste even more time on such a pathetic excuse for a “special”.

Here is Mike Adamle to get things going. The fans are all over him before he tells a story about a man who worked in a circus like atmosphere and wasn’t very good at his job. He’s talking about Ronald Reagan, who went from being a B list movie star to the Presidency. Reagan acted with a monkey, while Adamle said Jeff Harvey.

There have been people criticizing his work as an ECW commentator and wanting his resignation. That is your right as an American but it isn’t an American that he wants to be in. He wants to be in an America where a 5’9 man can play seven years in the NFL and be a star. As for tonight, how many people would like to see a championship match tonight? Instead, we’ll do three of them, with Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase defending the Tag Team Titles against John Cena/Batista….and here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL knows what it means to make a bad first impression, but now people see him for the success that he is. After bragging about being featured in Fortune Magazine and being a former professional football player, he brings up the World Title match at Summerslam. Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying he should get the title shot instead.

Bickering ensues, but Adamle cuts them off and makes JBL/Jericho vs. CM Punk, where either of them get the title shot at Summerslam if they beat him. If Punk wins, neither gets a title shot. That’s kind of an unfair stipulation, but I had to listen to Adamle talk so there is nothing fair. He’s just not the right pick for this spot and that was even more apparent here.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Paul Burchill

Burchill, with Katie Lea, is challenging and works on a wristlock to start. Kingston flips him over for two as we hear about Burchill’s rugby career. Some right hands in the corner keep Burchill in trouble but Katie offers a distraction, allowing Burchill to get in a clothesline. We hit something like a seated crossface chickenwing until Kingston fights up and strikes away. A crossbody gives Kingston two and Trouble In Paradise retains the title.

Rating: C+. Hopefully this finishes Burchill as a challenger as it feels like it has been going on for months now. Burchill hasn’t felt like a big time challenger but he keeps going after Kingston. The clean finish gives me some hope though as there is pretty much no reason to keep this going.

Post match the Burchills go after Kingston again, only to be cleared out. Cue Mickie James for her scheduled match with Katie.

Women’s Title: Katie Lea vs. Mickie James

Joined in progress with Mickie striking away, including a dropkick to the floor. Mickie hits a Thesz press off the apron and strikes away before doing the same in the corner. A neckbreaker over the ropes has Mickie in more trouble and we hit the surfboard. With that broken up, Mickie hits her own neckbreaker for two but Lea’s suplex gets the same. Not that it matters as the MickieDT retains the title.

Rating: C. This feud has been going even longer than Kingston vs. Burchill and it’s nice to seemingly have it wrap up. Mickie is in need of a fresh challenger for the title and there aren’t many options around here. Lea is fine enough in the ring but there are only so many people she can face at the moment. For now though, it doesn’t seem to be Mickie and that’s fine.

Post match Beth Phoenix runs in to take Mickie out. Santino Marella approves and mild spanking ensues.

Mike Adamle calls Stephanie McMahon to thank her for the opportunity. Beth Phoenix and Santino Marella come in to interrupt because they both want title shots at Summerslam. Adamle says there is only room for one more match so they bicker a bit. Adamle finally cuts them off and makes a tag match between the two of them and Kofi Kingston/Mickie James, winner take all.

Video on John Cena.

Batista is happy to get a shot at the Tag Team Titles but could go for a different partner. He could also go for the World Title shot at Summerslam but if beating John Cena gets him there, so be it.

Layla dances in the ring and we see a clip of her ending things with Jamie Noble (who had made reservations at Waffle House). Cue William Regal to remind us that he is the King Of The Ring but here is Noble to interrupt. The brawl is on but referees break it up.

CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield

Non-title. Hold on though as Mike Adamle pops up on screen to say that this match has a ten minute time limit. If the match goes to the time limit, it’s a triple threat match at Summerslam for the title. JBL and Jericho argue to start so Punk jumps them, not wanting a triple threat either. A double shoulder drops Punk and Jericho gets sent outside. The fall away slam gives JBL two on Punk an JBL slowly hammers away in the corner.

Jericho manages to send JBL into the steps though and the chinlock has Punk in trouble. Back up and Punk catches him on top, only to get pulled into an abdominal stretch with five minutes left. JBL comes back in and tries to steal the pin on Punk, meaning it’s time for the villains to slug it out. JBL gets sent outside so the Lionsault can give Jericho two. Punk is back up with a springboard clothesline to JBL before sending Jericho into the corner with three minutes left.

Punk’s running knee in the corner sets up the bulldog to drop JBL and the GTS gets two with Jericho making the save. Jericho gets catapulted into JBL for two as we have a minute and a half left. Another GTS attempt is countered into the Walls on Punk with JBL making his own save…and then falling on Punk to steal the pin with one second left.

Rating: C+. This had quite a few different rules and while they might have been more complicated than necessary, at least it clears up the question of who will be getting the title shot. On the other hand, it’s JBL, who is just so boring with everything he does that he drains the life out of everything. Punk should be able to get a nice title defense, but dang it is not going to be interesting on the way there.

We get a long recap of Chris Jericho injuring Shawn Michaels’ eye and possibly ending his career.

Michaels joins us from San Antonio and says his eye is really banged up. The injury has allowed him to take a break and heal up a bit but he has all kinds of health issues. He has another evaluation two days before Summerslam and he wants to come to the show and announce his decision. If he is allowed to compete, even on a part time basis, he’ll do it, but he’s going to listen to his doctors. Chris Jericho said maybe Shawn should just go home and be with his family….and maybe he should.

Here is Matt Striker to remind us who he is and request the best competition.

Matt Striker vs. Kane

Kane powers him away to start and shrugs off a forearm to the back. Kane plants him with a slam, hits the top rope clothesline and finishes with the chokeslam.

Post match Kane grabs the bag he has been carrying around and says he has been in a bad place lately. He looks at the bag and says “he’s not alive, he’s dead.”

Smackdown Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

Video on Batista.

John Cena talks about how that video gives him a perspective on Batista, because it makes him know what Batista can do in the ring. As for Mike Adamle, we’ll have to see what happens with his time as the boss, but anyone can see what happens when Cena and Batista face off.

Cena has been overshadowed by Batista more than once and knew that they were going to go head to head at some point. They they both wound up on Raw and he knew it would happen one day. Then a few weeks ago, he punched Batista in the face and knew that one day was going to be at Summerslam. First though, they can become Tag Team Champions. Cena hopes they win. This was the kind of promo that made the match feel so much bigger, which is where Cena tends to shine.

Kelly Kelly comes in to see Mike Adamle to compliment him on everything he has done. She brings up Kane, but Adamle has an idea for him for next week. For now though, she’s going to watch the main event with him.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Batista/John Cena

Cena and Batista are challenging. DiBiase starts with Cena and is quickly knocked down for an early two. Batista comes in to shove Rhodes down and fires off the shoulders in the corner. A missed charge goes into the post though and we take a break. Back with Rhodes working on the arm but Batista powers out again and hands it off to Cena. DiBiase breaks up the FU though and hits a belly to back. The fist drop (ala his dad) has commentary thinking DiBiase is mocking the Five Knuckle Shuffle because these two aren’t very good at times.

Batista does not look impressed as Cena gets double elbowed down for two more. Rhodes grabs a sleeper (from the left for a weird look) and then DiBiase does the same (from the right side, in case you were wondering), only to have Cena reverse into one of his own. That’s broken up as well but Cena walks over and slaps Batista in the face for the tag. A backdrop and spear take DiBiase down and Cena cuts Rhodes off, leaving the Batista Bomb to connect for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. The match itself was fairly dull, but the storytelling with Batista not wanting to do this because he can’t stand Cena, while Cena is always going to want to compete and win because that’s who he is. It made for an interesting dynamic and gives another layer to a match that is pretty much already set up. Other than that, it was a fairly long match with Cena and Batista running through the champions at the end, which is a bit more acceptable when you have a modern day Mega Powers in Cena and Batista.

Batista rather forcefully hands Cena his belt and they slowly hold up the titles. It turns into a pose off and then a staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show is pretty much Cena/Batista and then everything else, as there is very little that I would want to see otherwise. Adamle is just not interesting, which might be what they’re going for but it’s not making for the most thrilling material. Other than that, you have the World Title stuff which is hardly making me want to see what happens next. Batista and Cena are good stuff, but I’m going to need a lot more than that to sell this side of the Summerslam card.

 

 

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