Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night Two
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fair Park, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Kevin Gill

It’s the second half of the show and in this case, it needs to get a pretty big upgrade over the first half. Night one was a decent enough show, but it wasn’t memorable, which is the point of a show like this. Now that being being said, this show is built around the Clusterf*** Battle Royal, which could be quite the mess. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

We open with Joey Janela talking about beating Sean Waltman last night and wanting his flowers. He wonders why the fans hate him now but Spring Break needs a lethal dose of poison to turn it back into what it is supposed to be. This year, he is entering the Clusterf*** so he can end it once and for all. Maybe just don’t run it then?

Matt Cardona vs. Chris Dickinson

Chelsea Green is here with Cardona, who is currently the king, meaning yes he does have a Macho King crown. Green gets in an ALL HAIL THE DEATHMATCH KING and the fans are all over Cardona again. Cardona insults GCW and says they are the power couple of wrestling. Six years ago, he won the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania, but now he’s in this piece of garbage ring. If he was in WWE, like he should be, he would be celebrating his friend Mark Calaway, who he will see in the Hall of Fame one day.

Dickinson comes out with….MISSY HYATT to even things out, which is one of those names that makes this show feel fun. Both pairs share good luck kisses before the match, with Hyatt’s leaving Dickinson woozy. Dickinson wrestles him to the mat to start but Cardona is up to yell at Hyatt. That doesn’t work well for Dickinson, who grabs a cross armbreaker to send Cardona bailing to the floor.

Back in and Green grabs Dickinson’s foot for a distraction so Cardona can stomp away. After throwing his shirt at Hyatt, Cardona chokes with the wrist tape and then his hand for a bonus. The running forearm drops Dickinson again and a neckbreaker gives Cardona two. It’s already door time but Cardona spends too much time mocking the crowd, allowing Dickinson to backdrop him through the door in the corner.

The slugout is on with Cardona going to the eyes, only to get blasted with a running clothesline. The brainbuster gives Dickinson two but Green offers a distraction, allowing Cardona to nail a spear for two. Missy finally grabs Cardona’s boot and slaps Green, allowing Dickinson to hit a Death Valley Driver for two of his own.

Green offers another distraction so Cardona can hit a low blow into the Rough Ryder for two. Now it’s Green coming in and hitting Cardona with Missy’s loaded purse by mistake, allowing Dickinson to clothesline her down. The toss Razor’s Edge is enough for Dickinson to pin both of them at once at 12:43.

Rating: C+. You really can see why the GCW fans can’t stand Cardona in this run as he is one of the most annoying and obnoxious heels you could want to see. He is playing up the idea of being a big shot and that is one of the best ways to get heat from anyone. Dickinson is a decent power guy and looked good here, though Missy kind of disappeared for large chunks of the match.

Biff Busick vs. Tony Deppen

Feeling out process to start with Deppen trying to go to the mat to little success. Back up and Busick goes to the armbar, which has Deppen bailing to the ropes. Busick chops the heck out of Deppen, whose chops back have no effect. They head outside with Busick uppercutting away but a chop only hits the post. With Busick trying to shake it off, Deppen hits a flip dive off the apron and they head back inside.

Busick is fine enough to knee him down and the figure four necklock sends Deppen to the ropes again. Back up and Busick gets a little more violent by holding Deppen in place for some slaps to the face. Deppen is smart enough to go after Busick’s bad hand but Busick hits a running uppercut to take him down again.

Busick misses a charge though and Deppen hits a suicide flip dive for two back inside. Back up and the slugout goes to Busick until Deppen goes for the hand and grabs a Kimura of all things. With that broken up, Busick wins another strike off but Deppen avoids a charge in the corner. A running knee finishes Busick at 11:40.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you need two people to hit each other really hard and you got at least half of that here with Busick’s beating. Busick might not be a star in the making, but he’s an established hard hitter in the middle of the card and that should be enough to get him quite a few jobs. At the same time, you have Deppen as one of the better heels I’ve seen in a bit, as he is just straight up unlikable. Keep going with that and he’ll be fine.

Post match Deppen thanks Busick for the match but tells anyone who doesn’t believe in him what they can kiss.

Mike Bailey vs. Jordan Oliver

Bailey does his bow and they shake hands to start. Oliver does his pose so Bailey kicks him in the face and strikes away but Oliver is back up with chops of his own. Bailey’s leapfrog is countered into a faceplant and Oliver sends him outside for a big dive. Some kicks send Oliver through some chairs though and Bailey knees him in the chest.

Back in and Bailey kicks him in the chest for two, followed by the YES Kicks to make it worse. Bailey hits a running kick to the face in the corner and they strike it out again. Oliver snaps off a release German suplex and a sitout powerbomb for two but Bailey sends him outside. There’s the springboard moonsault to the floor and they strike it out on the apron.

Bailey gets the better of things and hits the moonsault knees, setting up the bouncing kicks back inside. The big kick to the head looks to set up the Ultimate Weapon but Oliver counters it with a cutter. A handspring cutter gets two so Oliver goes up, only to get pulled down with something like a One Winged Angel for the pin at 10:01.

Rating: C+. As is usually the case with Bailey, the action was good but he continues to have such a punchable face that it is hard to get into his matches. The good thing here was he didn’t have the stupid no selling that drags down every good thing he does, making this slightly easier to watch than most of his matches. Oliver has come a long way but still has a good bit to go before he moves up to the next level.

Effy says he shouldn’t be here but tonight he’ll beat Minoru Suzuki, have his own show tomorrow, and then maybe he’ll come for some gold.

Effy vs. Minoru Suzuki

Allie Katch is here with Effy. They both stick their jaws out with offers of a free shot but Effy’s attempt at a kiss gets him slapped. Suzuki slaps him down and then a kick to the face puts Effy on the floor. They head outside with Effy telling him to chop as hard as he can. That’s fine with Suzuki, who mocks Effy’s return chops.

A big boot sends Effy through the chairs and Suzuki cranks on the arm back inside. Effy tries some forearms but gets dropped with a single one from Suzuki. Then Effy bites Suzuki’s nipple and northern lights suplexes him for two. The big kiss staggers Suzuki but it’s a slap to the face and the Gotch style piledriver to give Suzuki the pin at 9:04.

Rating: C. Effy’s stuff may or may not be your cup of tea but Suzuki more or less squashed him here in a match with little to no doubt about the outcome. Effy was doing little more than comedy here so it isn’t like there was much to get annoyed about. They were going for the “wouldn’t it be funny if these two wrestled” idea here and I’ve seen worse versions.

Greatest Clusterf***

So this is basically a Royal Rumble, but only in the very loosest of terms. There are no set time intervals and I don’t believe there is a set number of entrants. I’m not going to be able to keep track of all of the eliminations, as I’ve never seen a version of this where they are all announced. This is going to be about total chaos and some surprise entrants and nothing more. You can be eliminated by pinfall, submission, over the top, leaving the building and…death?

Joey Janela is in at #1 and Buff Bagwell is in at #2 for your first surprise. Granted Buff is on a crutch but he has the American Males theme so this could be a lot worse. Janela wants to strut with him but it’s a superkick to get rid of Buff very quickly. George Gatton, with an unidentified title, is in at #3 and it’s a superkick into a piledriver to get rid of him too. Judas Judd Cassidy (I think?) is in at #4 and gets thrown over the top just as fast.

Yoya is in at #5 and suplexes Janela but gets caught in a heck of a package piledriver for the pin. Billie Starkz is in at #6 and a Gory Bomb takes Janela down but he raises knees to block her Swanton. That’s it for Starkz and it’s Juicy Finau (a big guy) in at #7. Janela can’t suplex him so Finau does it to Janela instead and it’s the even larger Sam Stackhouse, in Bam Bam Bigelow inspired gear, in at #8.

That leaves Janela to get crushed in the corner by back to back splashes but Stackhouse misses an ugly moonsault. Janela tosses both of them and it’s Rhett Titus in at #9 as Janela keeps up his Brock Lesnar-esque run. Titus wrestles him down and hits the running boot in the corner until it’s the Invisible Man in at #10.

So we have the Invisible Man, Janela and Titus with Titus and the Man slugging it out. The Man gets the better of both of them but an elbow to the face lets Janela and Titus beat him down. A double suplex lets the two of them pose but Man is back with a double low blow. The Man throws out Titus but gets stomped down until Dante Leon is in at #11. They waste no time in the next entrant with Ninja Mack in at #12.

Leon and Mack are long time rivals so they pose at each other before superkicking Janela down. A shooting star piledriver drops Mack and it’s a sick looking Jimmy Lloyd in at #13. Janela and Lloyd put on masks and they rehash their Social Distancing match, meaning they punch from a safe distance. Mack isn’t having that and kicks Lloyd down, setting up the running flip dive to drop Janela on the floor. Back in and Lloyd runs Mack over for the pin and Early Morning Guy Steele is in at #14.

Steele doesn’t seem to know what he is doing and falls off the top as Janela and Lloyd watch from the middle of the ring. Then Steele gives them a running double Blockbuster and a Canadian Destroyer each. Then he goes up top for a 450 to Lloyd, only to get rolled up for the pin from Janela. That was a weird one and it’s Blake Christian in at #15. House is cleaned but the Invisible Man hits Christian low. That earns him a dropkick and it’s Kevin Blackwood in at #16.

Blackwood’s suplex gets two on Leon and stomps on Janela in the corner until Hoodfoot is in at #17. Hoodfoot and Blackwood slug it out until Slade is in at #18. Young Dumb And Broke (Charlie Tiger and Ellis Taylor) are in at #19 and #20, giving us Janela, Invisible Man, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Hoodfoot, Slade, Tiger and Taylor as this is far more organized than I was expecting. Everyone hits everyone until Deranged is in at #21 to clean house. With that going nowhere, Grim Reefer is in at #22 and has a smoke.

We now pause for everyone to partake, including Janela, who says he isn’t with AEW anymore and can do what he wants. Janela runs to the back (I don’t think he’s been eliminated but who can tell around here?) and Sandra Moone is in at #23. Reefer clotheslines her down and it’s Parrow in at #24. House is cleaned with Deranged and Reefer being eliminated almost immediately.

Big F’N Vin is in at #25 as Janela is having some Cheetos. Vin kicks Parrow out without much trouble as Janela wants to know his next spot. Nate Webb is in at #26 and comes through the crowd, who sings his theme music. Lloyd gets dropped by the Invisible Man, who hammers on Webb in the corner. Janela superkicks the Invisible Man though and tosses him out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Webb misses a charge and gets low bridged to the floor and Hoodfoot is tossed as well.

Shazza McKenzie is in at #27 and goes after Janela to start the beating. Janela gets in a shot to the face though and grabs a door, only to have McKenzie spear him through it. Janai Kai is in at #28 and Jazzy Yang (Jimmy Wang’s daughter) follows her at #29. The four women in the match stare each other down and it’s Edith Surreal in at #30. That gives us Janela, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Tiger, Ellis, Moone, Vin, McKenzie, Kai, Yang and Surreal, assuming I didn’t miss any random eliminations.

Dark Sheik, another woman, is in at #31 and we have a six woman showdown. Uh make that seven as LuFisto is in at #32. Some of the guys come in to go after the women, with Leon and Taylor being tossed out. The women all beat up Tiger and toss him out with Vin joining him. Then the women get into it, with Kai kicking out LuFisto. Moone is out as well and McKenzie hits a Stunner on Kai for the elimination. Janela comes back in to superkick McKenzie for the pin and it’s Maven of all people in at #33.

Everyone stops to look at him so Maven hits a bunch of dropkicks….and then walks out for an elimination. Fans: “THANK YOU MAVEN!” With everyone else pairing off, Sean Ross Sapp, yes the dirt sheet writer, is in at #34, drawing a WE WANT MELTZER chant. Sapp gets a mic and begs people to subscribe to Fightful Select so they can read about GCW wrestlers getting fired by AEW. Josh Barnett, former UFC Heavyweight Champion, is in at #35 but fellow writer Denise Salcedo (not in the match) comes in to low blow Sapp and toss him out.

Nasty Leroy is in at #36 and Barnett blasts him with a clothesline as Jimmy Wang Yang is in at #37. Yang manages to take him down (not the prettiest but it worked) so Jazzy (remember, Yang’s daughter) comes in to grab the leg, which apparently counts as a submission to get rid of Barnett. Jazzy rolls up Lloyd for an elimination and it’s Alec Price in at #38. Price tosses Yang and dances a bit before getting kicked in the face by Jazzy. That’s enough for Price to toss her as well and it’s Cole Radrick in at #39.

Radrick and Price wind up on the apron and it’s a double elimination. Brandon Kirk is in at #40, giving us Janela, Christian, Blackwood, Slade, Surreal, Sheik, Leroy and Kirk (I think at least). Sheik hits Kirk low as we’re told Slade has left the building. Janela runs the ropes a lot until Lord Adrean (a Wal-Mart Guy) is in at #41. Adrean cleans house and Tombstones Kirk for the elimination, only to get Death Valley Drivered by Janela for another elimination. Kevin Matthews (you might remember him as KM in Impact) is in at #42 and stares it down with Leroy.

A not great looking Rock Bottom plants Matthews and a worse Rock Bottom sets up a leglock for the tap as Janela busts a gut laughing. Then Janela hits Leroy low and pins him and it’s Nick Wayne in at #43 for a brawl on the apron with Janela. Wayne superkicks Janela out for one heck of a pop and here is B-Boy to introduce Team LA Fights, which are six unnamed people. The team (Jai Vidal and Jack Cartwheel are two of them) clean house and something like a Styles Clash into a sitout powerbomb gets rid of Blackwood.

With those six in at #44-49, the Second City Crew (AJ Gray/Mance Warner/Matthew Justice/1 Called Manders and Levi Everett) are in #50-#54. The Crew cleans house with Matt Vandagriff (of LA Fights) being tossed. Damian Drake and Ju Dizz (I think) are both out with Hunter Freeman joining them. Cartwheel gets knocked out but walks on his hands until Manders chairs him down for the elimination. Vidal is tossed out and the Crew is left alone until the others still in the match come in.

Christian and Wayne get together to toss Everett and Manders. Somehow Christian and Wayne are the last two with Christian hitting a quick Downward Spiral for the pin…and never mind as yeah there are some people still left. Sheik comes in off the top with a spinwheel kick and the rest of the Crew pile onto her for the pin. Christian goes after the Crew but gets taken down and superplexed into a top rope legdrop for the pin….and that’s it at 1:23:57 (I guess Surreal was tossed somewhere in there).

Rating: C+. To be clear, this match is not about something coherent or anything more than having one name after another. That being said, this was WAY more coherent than the previous edition and that helped a lot. This felt more like a very indy Royal Rumble and, save for Surreal, no one was getting lost in the whole thing. I had a good time with this and it did fly by with some fun moments. It’s the kind of match that I was expecting from a Spring Break and it went well, especially with all of the insanity that came with it.

Overall Rating: B-. This was more like the Spring Breaks of the past and it worked out pretty well all things considered. It was a collection of some fun matches before we got to the big main event and that wound up working well. Good stuff here and it didn’t feel like a regular GCW show. While those can be fun, it’s not what I came into this wanting. The main event is all that mattered here and the other four matches were a nice bonus so we’ll call this a success.

 

 

 

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Mouse’s Wrestling Adventures: Fright Night
Date: October 11, 2019
Location: The Arena, Jeffersonville, Indiana
Commentators: Nick Miller, Chad Green

Assuming it is the same one, Mouse is someone who I have seen around on another show but don’t know much about him. Either way, this seems to be his (or someone named Mouse) show, which could go all over the place. I have no idea what is coming on this thing and that makes for a nice feeling. Let’s get to it.

Keep in mind I have never seen this promotion before so I apologize if I miss any plot or character bits.

We open with a Halloween theme, including clips from Hocus Pocus and Ernest Scared Stupid. Oh yeah I’m in the right place.

Logan Stunt vs. Cole Radrick

Logan is Marko’s brother and Cole is a pretty basic looking guy who can do good things in the ring. Radrick takes him to the mat to start as commentary (I have absolutely no idea if those names are right but it’s the closest I could get to what they were saying is in need of an early fix as it is BADLY distorted). A suplex sends Stunt into the corner but he’s back with a jumping knee to knock Radrick to the floor. The big suicide dive knocks Radrick into the fans, as there are no barricades here.

Back in and Radrick’s bridging butterfly suplex gets two but he misses a middle rope moonsault (commentary: “Little flippy doo action.”). A running knee gives Stunt two and it’s time for the slugout. Radrick knocks him into the ropes for a big running boot but Stunt manages to knock him outside. Back in and Radrick grabs a backpack Stunner into a running knee to the back of the head (BOOM!) for a rather near fall. A butterfly powerbomb finally puts Stunt away at 7:15.

Rating: C. They certainly started fast here and the fans are VERY hot for this show. Stunt is similar enough to his brother that he can get the sympathy while also being a bit bigger to keep things from being entirely ridiculous. Throw in a lack of floss dancing and this was an instant upgrade over most Marko matches.

The house band plays, because we have a house band.

Tom Hanks Memorial Battle Scramble

This is a Royal Rumble with thirty second intervals, but once we get down to five, a special entrant comes in to turn it into a six way scramble with pinfalls for eliminations. Also there might have been something about fans being allowed to throw people back in but it wasn’t easy to understand. Ace Perry is in at #1 and the Arena Phantom is in at #2 with the rather small Phantom sending him outside (not out) and backflipping into a pose back inside.

Back in and a big boot and suplex rock the Phantom as Levi Everett (he looks Amish) is in at #3. He takes his sweet time going around the ring to shake every hand he can though, leaving Perry to hit a low superkick on the Phantom. The claw has the Phantom down again but…some unnamed wrestler comes in to take Perry down. Reilly MaGuire is in at #4 and gets German suplexed by Perry.

The Phantom manages to skin the cat to stay alive and it’s Hoodfoot (Maybe) (that’s what the graphic says) in at #5, even as Levi is still on the floor shaking hands. Reilly tornado DDTs the unnamed guy and Trigga Travis is in at #6. Levi and another unnamed wrestler get in at the same time, but here is Adam Slade in at #8 (I guess?). Levi, the second unnamed guy and Slade seem to be part of the Lost Boys and it’s Levi snapping Reilly’s arm.

Step Stool Sarah, who might be a backstage worker, is in at #9 and hits a Stunner (because she’s in a Steve Austin jersey) before trying to eliminate herself….but she gets stuck on the top. Chris Copeland is in at #10 and the brawling continues until Jack Andrews is in at #11. The Phantom is eliminated off camera and it’s Loki Havok (Commentary: “He’s an odd bird.”) in at #12 to clean house.

Patrick Heeter is in at #13 as commentary has no idea who is in or how many are left. Nolan Edward is in at #14 and with nothing happening, Righteous Jesse is in at #15. Heeter knocks him straight down and puts him in the Tree of Woe for….us to cut to another wrestler who doesn’t get a graphic on his entrance. Whoever he is he’s in at #16 as there might be another entrant drinking in the crowd. Someone carrying a bag walks back through the entrance and it’s Danhausen in at #17.

We haven’t had commentary for a few minutes now and the handheld camera work isn’t helping. Lord Crewe is in at #18 and eliminates two unnamed guys in similar tights. Havok goes Joey Ryan by no selling a testicular claw, only to be tossed a second later. Another unnamed guy is tossed and a clothesline puts the original unnamed guy out, all at the hands of Crewe. There goes Heeter as well as the ring is rapidly clearing out. A toss powerbomb sends someone else onto the pile but Danhausen rallies the troops to go after Crewe.

Danhausen pours teeth into Crewe’s mouth and boots him out, leaving us with five. That means the special entrant can come in and it’s….the Wilson volleyball from Cast Away. This freaks Crewe out and has him in tears of apology, but Wilson starts talking to him. Wilson is thrown inside, where he chokeslams Everett. Then Wilson breaks up a superplex attempt and hits a super hurricanrana, followed by what I think is a Canadian Destroyer on Reilly.

Danhausen sizes him up, inserts a tooth, and stomps away. Now it’s time for the piano mat from Big, allowing Danhausen to dance and hit people in the head with Wilson. That’s enough piano and Wilson is chucked over the top and onto some of the wrestlers at ringside. Slade hits a springboard dive to take everyone down on the floor again, followed by Reilly moonsaulting off the top to take them all down again. Back in and a superplex sends Slade into the pile again, leaving a fan to ask “what the f*** is happening”.

Danhausen hits a slingshot German suplex and a running knee for two on Perry but Reilly kicks Wilson into him. Slade gives Reilly a running Canadian Destroyer but Perry hits him with a running Death Valley Driver into the corner for another two. Then Wilson Stuns Danhausen, leaving Levi to hit a top rope headbutt for two on Wilson, as this really needs to wrap up already. Another top rope headbutt is enough to finish Wilson and give Levi the pin at 32:00.

Rating: D+. There were a lot of fun moments, but this was WAY too long and it hurt things a lot. There were also far too many people, with a lot of them only there so Crewe could toss them out. I’ve seen matches like this one several times before and they almost all wind up having the same issues. I didn’t hate it, but I was ready for it to end about ten minutes early. Throw in commentary being gone for over half of the match and I was more lost than anything else.

Lee Moriarty vs. Shawn Kemp

Kemp is a rather good sized guy with a bunch of dog nicknames. Commentary is back as Moriarty hits a big springboard armdrag into a dropkick to put Kemp on the floor. Back in and Kemp runs him over with a crossbody, setting up the chinlock. Moriarty gets a boot up in the corner though and a top rope stomp to the arm lets him strike away. A suplex doesn’t work on Kemp, who hits a Judas Effect into a Psycho Driver for two.

Another shot to the arm slow Kemp down and a quick suplex gives Moriarty two more. A clothesline sets up a Fujiwara armbar (with finger twisting) but Kemp is in the ropes. With the holds not working, Moriarty takes him up top but a swinging fisherman’s buster brings him right back down. Back up and Kemp hits an enziguri into…something that doesn’t work as the arm gives out. What looked to be an F5 gives Moriarty the pin at 10:23.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but eventually they settled down into Moriarty picking him apart with the focus on the arm. I can always go for someone being that solid technically and Moriarty was on it here. Kemp is another big yet athletic guy, though he is going to need a bit more tho make him stand out.

Brett Ison vs. Calvin Tankman vs. Dominic Garrini

Hoss battle so it’s a chop circle to start. We’ll make that a punch circle as things get a little more intense early on. Ison gets double teamed down but Tankman Pounces Garrini to send him outside. A backbreaker into a clothesline drops Ison again but he dives back in to make a save.

Tankman BLASTS Garrini with a chop, only to have Garrini triangle choke him down. Ison is back up so Garrini gives him a German suplex, which doesn’t have much effect. Ison mixes things up with a Styles Clash, drawing Tankman back in for the save. Back up and Ison elbows the heck out of Tankman for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C+. They didn’t try to do anything out of the ordinary here, as you had three big monsters hitting each other until one of them couldn’t kick out. That’s all it was supposed to be and I had fun watching them beat on each other. Those chops were great and I liked it ending with a shot to the face instead of something more complicated, as it kind of fits the theme.

Baka Gaijin vs. Naturally Gifted

That would be Madman Pondo/2 Tuff Tony (from Juggalo Championship Wrestling) vs. Bradley Prescott IV/Chase Holliday. Naturally Gifted seems to be part of the Lost Boys, and come out to the theme Rich Swann uses when he isn’t in Impact. Prescott has quite a bit of beer on his way to the ring and we get in-ring entrances, with Pondo and Tony insisting that they go first. It’s a brawl to start with Prescott and Holliday being beaten down on the floor as this is rather one sided early on.

Back in and a barbed wire bat to the back has Holliday screaming but Prescott is back up with a beer. That’s fine with Tony, who comes up with a bottle of vodka. There’s a pumpkin rolling around on the floor as Tony and Prescott try each others’ drinks (that’s just not sanitary). They trade sides and it’s Holiday avoiding a stop sign shot. An STO and basement dropkick get two on Pondo, followed by Prescott adding a jumping Stunner.

A Van Daminator (with a case of beer instead of a chair) gets two on Tony, who is back up with Pondo for a double elbow. Holliday is hung over the top for a flipping legdrop, drawing Prescott over for a save this time. The stop sign shot rocks Prescott and Tony hits (mostly) a Lionsault to make it worse. Pondo brings in a cinder block and a sledgehammer (commentary: “Somebody gonna die.”). The block is put between Holliday’s legs and crushed by the sledgehammer, setting up a fireball to finish Prescott at 9:50.

Rating: D-. I can’t stand this kind of stuff and it was little more than a squash for Pondo and Tony. They’re big guys who can’t move very well but they’re TOUGH, meaning they can do a bunch of stuff and not sell anything. The match wasn’t funny and was a way for the two of them to look great at the others’ expense, which isn’t so much interesting as much as it is annoying. Really not a fan of these guys and this didn’t make that any better.

Billie Starkz vs. Hawlee Cromwell

Cromwell jumps her during her entrance but Starks gets in a few kicks to take over. A clothesline gives Starkz two but Cromwell sends her into the corner for a running kick to the head. They slug it out on the apron with Cromwell getting the better of things, setting up a dropkick to the side of the head for two. Some forearms rock Cromwell in the corner and she charges into a boot to the face to make it worse.

I think they try a suplex to the floor but land on the ropes, resulting in a nasty looking fall to the floor. Back in and Cromwell grabs a swinging facebuster for two, followed by something like a Death Valley Driver/Air Raid Crash for the same. Starkz grabs a fisherman’s suplex for two and a sunset driver (with Cromwell’s head not even approaching the mat) for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one again as they weren’t exactly the most polished out there. Starkz is someone I’ve seen a few times before and she can have a good enough match but that wasn’t the case here. The execution didn’t quite work here and it was one of those matches that lost me pretty quickly, which is never a good sign.

The Carnies vs. The Night Ryderz

That would be Kerry Awful/Nick Iggy/Tripp Cassidy vs. Aaron Williams/Alex Colon/Dustin Rayz. The brawl is on before the bell with the Carnies beating them down both in and outside. We settle down to Colon getting crotched on the post and the choking in the corner drawing in the rest of the Ryderz for a failed save attempt. Everything breaks down with Colon getting kneed and suplexed for two.

The brawl heads to the floor as commentary hasn’t bothered to tell us who these people are, so we’re stuck with wild brawling and general insanity. The Carnies choke Colon in the corner and kick Williams (thanks commentary) in the head. Colon and Williams are back with double kicks and stereo suicide dives, leaving Rayz to clean house inside.

A DDT plants Iggy for two with Cassidy shoving the referee for the save. Awful is back in with a chokebomb to Colon, who pops up with a piledriver and a crucifix for two on Iggy. Colon and Iggy chop it out until Awful plants Williams for two, with Colon making the save. A hanging DDT/top rope double stomp drops Iggy on his head for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C. This was the kind of brawl that you knew was coming on a show like this and that may or may not be a good thing. The lack of knowing who was who didn’t really matter in the end but it’s nice to at least know their names as they’re brawling. Either way, it was a good enough brawl, even if there have been a lot of wild fights on the show so far tonight.

Before the main event, Marko and Logan Stunt get in the ring to goof around a bit.

Grindhouse Pro Title: Freddie Hudson vs. Tyler Matrix vs. The Kenway

Hudson is defending. Matrix jumps both of them to start fast, including a belt shot to Hudson. They head outside where Hudson loses his shirt but Kenway is back in with a fisherman’s….something, which is countered into a small package for two. Hudson and Kenway slug it out until Matrix comes back in to run them over. Matrix superkicks Kenway to the floor and tells the fans to move, setting up the suicide dive.

Another dive drops Matrix and Kenway, leaving everyone down on the floor. Back in and Matrix hits a Canadian Destroyer on Hudson, followed by Kenway hitting one on Matrix. Not to be outdone, Hudson is up with a middle rope Canadian Destroyer to Kenway to leave everyone down. Back up and we get the circle slugout with Hudson being knocked down first.

Back up and Hudson slugs it out with Matrix, setting up a standing Sliced Bread for two. Kenway is back in with a rolling German suplex on Hudson, setting up a pumphandle suplex for two more. Matrix grabs a reverse fireman’s carry backbreaker on Kenway, with Hudson having to make a save. Matrix shrugs off Hudson’s poisonrana so Hudson does it again. Kenway is back in with a powerbomb to Hudson, who pops up with a Shining Wizard to retain at 8:24.

Rating: C+. They had me until the ending, when it became a bunch of no selling that always drives me crazy. Matrix has been around the circuit for a bit, including a long time in Ohio Valley Wrestling, and he has had some nice stuff before. Hudson and Kenway were both fine enough, though not exactly standing out from the larger pack.

Respect is shown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were some good parts here but the bad ones had me losing any reason to care. That battle royal and that Pongo/Tony tag match were death for the show and at least the battle royal overshadowed a lot of the good things going on. The atmosphere was fun though and I had a nice enough time in parts to keep it from being a disaster, but not a very good show for the most part. Also, where was Mouse?

 

 

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