Relentless Wrestling
Date: March 29, 2023
Location: Don Quixote Event Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Maddox Ryan, Heather

We’ll kick off the Wrestlemania weekend with this promotion from the Pacific northwest. This is one of the shows that I was hoping to find and they’re streaming it on their Twitch channel so it’s worth a look. I’ve heard of a few names on the card and there is some potential here. Let’s get to it.

Note that I am coming into this completely blind and have no idea about storylines, history or anything else. I apologize in advance for anything I get wrong.

Also note that the camera appears to be a handheld from the balcony and nothing more, so the production value isn’t the highest.

The unnamed host comes out to welcome the fans, who are amazed that the fans came out on a Wednesday night. He thanks the fans here and back home in Spokane, Washington and lists off their local sponsors, plus the venue. The host (Maddox Ryan? Maybe?) brings out his co-host and ring announcer, Arya Blake, who used to work in MLW as MJF’s girlfriend.

Andrew Everett vs. Danny Limelight vs. Keita vs. Robert Martyr vs. Jai Vidal vs. Adam Brooks

So this is a six way elimination match for a Championship Contract (I’m assuming #1 contender). The fans certainly seem into Keita, who is announced as a former champion. On the other hand, Everett is a former Impact Wrestling star who is dressed liked the Giant of WCW fame and billed from Grenoble in the French Alps. Limelight praises Los Angeles and gets beaten down as a result.

Everett’s double chokeslam is broken up and I guess we’re off without a bell. Brooks starts cleaning house but stops to dance, only to counter an Everett chokeslam into a DDT. Everett gets knocked down again and it’s Vidal taking Limelight over the top to clear the ring. Back in and Vidal hits some running knees in the corner as apparently Brooks tapped out somewhere in there (even commentary, as limited as it is, seems surprised).

Keita grabs a kneebar to make Vidal tap and is announced as the winner with his music playing, but he grabs the mic to say this is elimination rules. I think we can call that a botch and move on to Keita diving onto everyone else at ringside. Back in and Everett takes out Martyr and Limelight hits a piledriver for the elimination.

A sitout powerbomb gets two on Keita before Martyr and Limelight slug it out. Martyr gets choked out and it’s down to Keita vs. Limelight. Keita gets fired up and slugs it out with Limelight again before having to backflip out of a choke. An ankle lock gives Keita the win and the title shot (Commentary: “Wait did he just win?”) at 11:22.

Rating: C. I do appreciate the elimination rules and the match certainly wasn’t bad, but this production is taking some getting used to. It’s hard to keep track of what is going on and commentary is only talking about the match here and there. The action worked well enough though and the fans were way into Keita so they certainly went with the popular star. As for the rest, the Giant thing feels more than a bit out of date and only Vidal really stood out, but for what we were seeing here, it could have been a lot worse.

Wrestling With Wregret Internet Title: Zicky Dice vs. ???

Yes it’s the title from Brian Zane’s webseries on the line. Dice, with former champion Levi Shapiro is defending in an open challenge and Simon Miller from Whatculture answers. The rather strong Miller sends him into the ropes to start but Dice comes up with some streamers to knock him back. That works as well as streamers to the face are going to go and Dice bails to the floor. Dice: “Who trained this guy???”

Shapiro comes in and offers a distraction (and a trip) so Dice can punch Miller down, setting up the Arn Anderson eye rake on the ropes. Dice gets two off a bridging northern lights suplex and a clothesline gets the same. Back up and Miller hits him in the face, causing Dice to throw up his own X….and pull another streamer from his mouth, Phantasmo style. The streamer clotheslines Miller down and Dice gets in a hip swivel into a reverse chinlock.

Miller fights up and runs Dice over, which is enough for Shapiro to pull Dice outside. Some silly string to the face (and near the referee) drops Miller, who is fine enough to do a not great tilt-a-whirl slam. Miller misses a middle rope splash as Ryan starts talking a lot more on commentary. Dice sprays something else at Miller but here’s a masked man to belt Dice in the head….for a double DQ at 9:10.

Rating: D. Yeah this really didn’t work and commentary/fans asking “what just happened” isn’t a good sign. The match was all about the comedy, which wasn’t exactly funny and the ending was even worse. This was quite the step down from the opener and felt more like a way to have a title match without having any kind of a serious ending. Miller didn’t help himself here either, and this was a hard sit.

Post match everyone leaves and the mask stays on.

Team Slim Jim vs. Thrussy

That would be Drexl/Warhorse/Chase James vs. Allie Katch/Effy/Dark Sheik. Upon a fan request, commentary tries to start a DADDY EFFY chant, even as Warhorse and Katch chop it out. Katch is rather confused but is fine enough to shrug off Warhorse’s shoulder. Warhorse is allowed to roll Katch up for two and they stop to pose at each other. Sheik (a hardcore woman) and Drexl (a hardcore guy) come in, with the fans thinking Sheik is going to kill him.

They stare at each other a bit until Sheik chops him in the corner to no avail. The fans think Drexl is a sick f*** as he offers to let Sheik chop him…so she drops down for a low blow. Drexl seems to approve so Sheik kicks him into the corner. Effy and James come in to complete the trilogy of pairings and they strike it out. Effy blocks a kiss attempt though and hits an atomic drop before dropping onto all fours.

With that not going anywhere, Effy hits some running kicks in the corner for two and Sheik adds a slingshot legdrop. James is sent face first into the back of Katch’s trunks (wiggling ensues) and we hit a front facelock to slow things down. Effy comes back in and…I think bites James’ nipple, earning himself a knockdown. James finally gets over to Warhorse to pick up the pace as everything breaks down.

Drexl paper cuts Effy and cuts Katch in the corner, only to get dropped by Effy. Sheik’s top rope spinning legdrop gets two on Drexl….and here’s a giant Slim Jim. Said Slim Jim beats up Thrussy but they get together and make him eat a regular Slim Jim. Sheik hits a top rope spinwheel kick to Warhorse and Effy hits a Rough Ryder to finish Drexl at 15:55.

Rating: C. This was oddly entertaining, as they went pretty straightforward with the Slim Jim, even if it’s a rather strange gimmick. The action was much more comedy based but in this case it actually worked a bit better. Effy and Katch are bigger names here and it makes sense to have them go over, especially over Drexl, who didn’t seem that well received.

Post match the fans get Slim Jims.

Pacific Northwest Relentless Title: Alan Angels vs. Chris Bey

Angels is defending and does not seem to be the most popular. They go with the grappling to start and Bey gets to dance, only to get caught in a headlock. Bey is back up and sweeps the leg a few times, sending Angels outside. Back in and Bey hits a double stomp to the back as commentary talks about the character development needed to be a manager.

Bey chops him down and adds a kick to the back as the giant Slim Jim jumps in on commentary for a minute (he is also NOT Jackson Price, despite their apparent similar sizes). Angels manages a kick to the back as commentary switches to Keita eating burritos. A hard clothesline gives Angels two and we hit the abdominal stretch. Bey fights out and hits a running clothesline, followed by a kick to the head for two.

Angels’ standing Sliced Bread gets the same but he misses a top rope…we’ll say knee, allowing Bey to grab a Code Red for two (should have gone Baja Blast, or at least not Pitch Black). Bey can’t hit the Art of Finesse (springboard cutter) and Angels drops him hard with a clothesline for two more. They’re both down…and here’s Keita with his contract from earlier. Keita pins Angels to win the title at 12:29.

Rating: C+. I was getting into this one and wanted to see who was going to win before the screwy finish. That being said, I can get not wanting to pin a bigger name like Bey while also not wanting to give him the title. This gets the belt back on what feels more like a promotion regular while also giving us a pretty nice match. You could tell that these guys were on another level and that was a good boost for the show.

The host thanks a camera woman who has been at all of their shows.

POW Pro Wrestling Title: Vin Massaro vs. Funnybone

This is from the POW promotion and Massaro (with Mr. Ooh-La-La) is challenging. The funny part is that Massaro’s music has been played twice by mistake throughout the night and commentary said something like “HE’S REALLY COMING OUT THIS TIME”. Funnybone is a scary yet popular clown/demon who enziguris Massaro to start but a cheap shot sends Funnybone into the corner.

Stomping and choking ensue but Funnybone fights up and sends him outside for the suicide dive. Back in and Funnybone misses something from the top, allowing Massaro to suplex him into the corner. Some running knees to the face give Funnybone two but he accidentally kicks the referee down. Massaro grabs a chair but cue a rather large man to spear Massaro down. Funnybone adds a top rope double stomp to retain at 8:26.

Rating: C. I feel like I’ve seen Funnybone before and Massaro has been around for a bit, so this match had some experience. It felt like more of a showcase for the promotion and its title, which is a good enough way to get something else on the card. Granted I’m not sure why you would want to do that when you’re having your highest profile show to date, but maybe it was some agreement.

Kidd Bandit vs. Brooke Havok vs. Act Yasukawa vs. Billie Starkz

No word on if this is elimination or one fall to a finish, as commentary would rather say Bandit is “so pushy as a heel”. Havok and Starkz are sent outside fast and Act ties Bandid’s legs in the ropes for a running dropkick. Bandit is back up with a rollup and the two of them go outside. Starkz and Havok come back in with Havok grabbing a headscissors as we lose audio for a second. Act is back in with a missile dropkick to Bandit, setting up Starkz’ flip dive onto all three.

Back in and Bandit gives Starkz a backbreaker into a spinning Downward Spiral for two. Starks is fine enough to pick up for a Doomsday crossbody from Havok, who gets to slug it out with Act. Bandit kicks Act down so Starkz has to Swanton in for the save. Back in and Starks grabs a quick rollup to pin Havok, leaving everyone seeming a bit surprised.

Rating: C+. This was pretty much on the nose for the standard format four way and it worked well enough. Starkz is someone whose name has been getting out there more and more as of late, including an AEW appearance, making her the biggest name here. The ending came a bit out of nowhere, but that’s kind of the idea behind a match like this. Quick and to the point, but the action made it work.

Here is Tom Lawlor for the main event but he doesn’t have Team Filthy (his usual partners) with him. Instead, he is willing to let two men have a chance to join. This brings out Matt Vandergriff and Cal Jack, who seems rather patriotic. It seems we have a six man.

Tom Lawlor/Matt Vandergriff/Cal Jack vs. TJP/Jacob Austin Young/Mike Bailey

TJP is the hometown boy so I think we have a hero (thought he fans seem to like Bailey more). The villains jump the good guys to start but TJP and company send them outside for stereo triple dives. We settle down to Vandergriff getting taken into the corner for the early beating, including TJP’s corner handstand into a headscissors. TJP ties him up in the Muta Lock but has to let go because that’s not a normal way to bend.

Jack gets in a cheap shot from the apron to Young though and it’s Lawlor (who has his fans) coming in to take over. Hold on though as Lawlor needs to stop and take off his shorts to reveal his signature cutoff jean shorts. There’s a Stink Face to Young and Vandergriff comes in to keep up the beating. Jack’s gutwrench suplexes give him two but Young is able to hit Lawlor with some loud chops.

The comeback is cut off by a Jack bearhug until Young manages to slip out and grab a sleeper. That’s broken up, but the hot tag brings in Bailey to loudly kick away. Jack gets in a low superkick and brings Vandergriff back in to send Bailey into the middle buckle. Bailey catches him on top for a super hurricanrana though and it’s off to TJP vs. Lawlor. A discus forearm cuts TJP off but he does his swing through the ropes into a….broken Sharpshooter.

Lawlor reverses into a cross armbreaker, which is reversed into some weird Sharpshooter cousin. That’s broken up as well and a Side Effect gives Lawlor two. Bailey comes back in to kick away, including the bouncing series into an enziguri on Vandergriff. Everything breaks down and Vandergriff moonsaults onto everyone not named TJP. Lawlor breaks up TJP’s dive though, only to have TJP kick him down.

A frog splash gives TJP a rather close two but Bailey is back in with his spinning kick in the corner. Jack cuts Bailey off so Vandergriff can hit a 450 for two of his own but TJP cleans house. TJP guillotines Jack so Bailey can add the Ultimate Weapon, allowing the good guys to grab triple submissions for the stereo triple tap at 17:30.

Rating: B. This was absolutely the match that should have headlined the show as it was easily the best thing all night. It’s another case of having the most talented stars in the ring and getting to see just how good they are. Bailey and TJP are both very talented and Lawlor should be in a bigger spot somewhere. I got into this one and it was a heck of a way to end the show, so well done all around.

The winners celebrate and Blake thanks the fans to wrap up the night.

Overall Rating: C+. While it had a VERY rocky start, this got better as it went along and the bigger stars helped a lot. What matters is they had an entertaining enough night when more people are probably going to see them than ever before. There are better indies out there that are more worth your time, but this was a nice mixture of their own talent and people who were around to make for a nice night.

They need to fix A LOT of stuff, with commentary being at the top (granted it was more people filming the show and trying to talk about it rather than traditional commentary so fair enough), but for what it was, it’s a nice enough use of two and a half hours. Cut out the Dice/Miller stuff and it’s that much better, but nothing else was close to bad all night. The main event is worth seeing if you’re in for some lower scale but still good indy action though and for a show like this, that’s a solid result.

 

 

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Zicky Dice’s Trouble In Paradise 2
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fairmont Hotel, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jonny Loquasto, Zick Dicey, Matthew Rehwoldt

This is another of the Wrestlemania Weekend shows and in this case, it is another WrestleCon show. I didn’t actually take this one in as I went to Axxess instead and I’m not sure what this is going include. That can make for some very fun shows as well and hopefully that is the case again. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features Zicky Dice standing on a train track as the Outlandish Paradise Express train comes straight for him. Dice whips out some, uh, dice, and throws them at the train, which explodes.

We meet the commentary team, which includes Zick Dicey, a puppet, who isn’t mic’d well. They aren’t thrilled with waiting so long on ring announcer Chris Van Vliet taking his sweet time getting to the ring.

Van Vliet finally comes to the ring (about eight minutes into the broadcast) to fire up the crowd, including those watching on Twitch (where the original broadcast took place). The opening video plays on the screen and here is Zicky Dice himself. Dice if fired up to be here, partially because it’s a tax write off. He doesn’t have a match tonight so send him Lex Luger or Bret Hart. The open challenge to anyone upstairs at WrestleCon is on to anyone with a broken hip or any old guy.

Cue Matt Cardona, who is mad over Dice crashing the Major Figures Pod last night. Cardona asks who the f*** is paying him to be here, asking if it’s Dice, Twitch, Mike from WrestleCon or whoever else. Dice may be the King of the Internet but he’s the Internet Champion and should be out there. That’s cool with Dice, who references Chelsea Green and a banana before issuing the challenge for an Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title shot. Let’s do a Twitch sub goal and make it falls count anywhere. Game on.

Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title: Matt Cardona vs. Zicky Dice

Dice is challenging and it’s falls count anywhere. Cardona tries Radio Silence to start but gets powerbombed down for an early two. They go to the floor and trade slams until Cardona is whipped hard into the steps. Back in and Cardona spits some water in his face so Dice puts his hands into his own trunks, only to have Cardona shove them into his mouth.

Cardona goes to hammer away in the corner but gets bit in the leg and tossed to the floor. They fight into the crowd with Dice hitting a suplex on the concrete for two. Things move into the lobby (where Chelsea Green can be seen going up the escalator), where Cardona hits a Reboot against the steps to retain at 5:38.

Rating: C. This was a bit of a disappointment as they didn’t do much with the stipulation, but I can understand the idea of not being able to brawl around a rather fancy hotel. At the same time, they were trying to get Dice on the show and Cardona is a pretty big name compared to the rest of the card. Not exactly a great match, but it felt big enough for something like this.

Post match Cardona hits him with a sign, sending Dice riding up the escalator.

The puppet’s mic has been fixed.

Deonn Rusman vs. Jonah Turk

Turk is a rather large man (weighing in at “a metric ton of love”) and apparently someone Dice does not like on his Twitch stream. Rusman shoves Turk into the corner to start and a single shoulder puts Turk down again. Turk manages to run him over for a breather though and goes to the middle rope. That means a powerbomb out of the corner, setting up a spear to give Rusman the pin at 2:49. Turk getting in the ring seemed to be a joke for Dice’s Twitch stream so you can’t get too mad at a nothing match here.

Post match Rusman spears him again for fun.

Jah-C vs. Levi Shapiro vs. Keita Murray vs. Lord Crewe vs. Carlie Bravo vs. Darian Bengston

One fall to a finish because we need a (Sensational Sextuplet) Scramble match. Bengston (“the Shakespeare geek”) gets jumped from behind to start and tossed to the floor, which at least clears the ring for a bit. Keita stands in the corner and warms up while the other four brawl inside. That means a big double middle finger from Keita, earning him a four way boot to the face. We settle down to Shapiro powerslamming Jah-C but Bravo is up to clean house.

Crewe and Bravo slug it out with Crewe dropping him, only to get jumped by Bengston. We settle down to Crewe vs. Shapiro before they start to powerbombing Jah-C and Bravo. The other four get back in for stereo double belly to back suplexes and everyone is down. Jah-C DDTs Keita into the corner but Shapiro pulls him outside. That earns Shapiro a crotching on the top and it’s time for the string of flip dives. Shapiro cuts off the referee’s dive (Loquasto: “I don’t know what is going on here.”) but the second attempt connects to wipe out the pile on the floor.

Back in and Bengston hits a tiger driver 98 on Bravo but the referee gets pulled out. There’s the required Tower of Doom, allowing Bravo to come off the top with a splash for two. Crewe gets to clean house for a bit before we hit a short form version of the parade of secondary (I think?) finishers. Jah-C Finally hits a superkick to finish Bengston at 11:18.

Rating: C+. I have never been a fan of this kind of match as there are a bunch of people flying around and trying their best to get some spotlight while also having to sell for everyone else. That doesn’t make for the best match and that was the case again here. There were some cool spots, as always, but no one got to stand out in the slightest. That can get a bit old and it isn’t like anyone gets much out of something like this other than an appearance.

Everyone but Bengston leaves so here are the New Japan LA Dojo to beat Bengston down. Bengston is out of the Factory and the two schools aren’t getting along. Fair enough.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus

Dorado’s new gimmick seems to be that he is a marijuana enthusiast, though he does stop to say hello to superfan Vladimir (of the unreleased documentary fame). Neither of them can get a hurricanrana to start so Dorado offers Taurus a puff. With that not working, Dorado dropkicks him to the floor but the running flip dive is pulled out of the air. A powerbomb sends Dorado into the barricade, with commentary saying “when you mess with the bull, sometimes you get the horns and sometimes you get powerbombed into the barricade”.

Taurus sends him into the barricade a few times and then hits Dorado square in the mask. Back in and Dorado can’t get a cross armbreaker so he settles for a German suplex and a springboard moonsault press for two each. Taurus is right back with a pop up Samoan drop for two of his own but Dorado grabs the Golden Rewind. A crucifix bomb drops Taurus and Dorado hits a pair of moonsaults to send him outside.

That’s fine with Dorado, who hits a big dive to the floor. Back in and a poisonrana plants Taurus for two more but Taurus hits a powerbomb backbreaker to cut Dorado off fast. They go to the same corner, where Dorado snaps off a super hurricanrana and lands on his feet, because of course he can do that. A shooting star press gives Dorado the pin at 12:04.

Rating: B-. I liked this one more than I was expecting to as the power vs. speed formula works again. The Lucha Lit gimmick for Dorado might not have the longest shelf life but it certainly gets your attention, at least in the short term. Taurus continues to feel like a huge monster and while it is a big weird to see him lose here, he should be fine going forward just by letting him beat people up.

Post match they share some of Dorado’s….stuff.

Mike Bailey vs. Effy

Submission match. Bailey sneaks up behind him to start and hits the big flip dive to the floor. They go into the stands where Effy chokes but gets pulled into a cross armbreaker. An STF, using a chair (that’s a new one), has Effy in trouble for a bit before they head inside for some chops to stagger Effy some more. Back up and Effy ducks a kick to the face and tries a rollup as he forgets the rules.

Instead Effy tries a leg choke in the corner before trying a kneebar…but he doesn’t know what he’s doing so Bailey laughs at him. They slap each other with Bailey getting the better of things so Effy goes with an atomic drop. A backdrop sets up something like a dragon sleeper but Bailey slips out and spins him into a rather nasty Deathlock. With that not working, Effy is sent outside for the big dive as per Bailey’s custom.

Speaking of customs, Bailey misses his moonsault knees onto the apron, allowing Effy to wrap the knee around the post. Back in and Effy bites Bailey’s chest but gets taken down for the moonsault knees. The Ultimate Weapon connects for Bailey so he grabs a rear naked choke, which is reversed into….Effy biting the toe (after removing the boot and licking the sole) and Bailey taps at 13:07.

Rating: D+. I don’t know if I don’t get Effy or if I was missing the joke here but this really didn’t work. It was built around the comedy, but the comedy wasn’t working here. I’ve heard good things about Effy and I’ve seen him do some fun stuff before, though I couldn’t get into this one. Then again it might be due to getting sick of Bailey after so many matches from him this weekend.

Commentary recaps the night so far.

Masha Slamovich vs. The Bear

This was billed as an actual bear but we get….Parrow, who brings out a guy in a bear costume. The Bear is billed as being from Jellystone Park, though the fact that his graphic says Scotty 2 Hotty would suggest otherwise. Granted a previous graphic read “The Bear (Max The Impaler)” kind of killed the mood. The Bear beats up the handlers so Masha throws marshmallows at him, only to have the Bear grab a bearhug (you knew that was coming).

Masha gets thrown around even more but the referee gets a marshmallow in his face. A German suplex gives Masha a breather but she gets thrown down for trying a choke. Therefore, she tries to use the referee to appear bigger, as you do to deal with a bear. More of the Bear costume comes off before Masha chokes again and the Bear is out at 6:38.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t as long as the previous match but this one felt like they had a single joke but didn’t realize that they had to do something with it. The Bear looked good to start but then it was the same stuff over and over until Masha won with the fifth or so choke. This needed more jokes in the ring rather than on commentary and I wasn’t getting into it very well.

Rich Swann vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Well it’s certainly a unique main event. Swann dances through the crowd on the way to the ring, as he tends to do. After the Big Match Intros, Scotty takes his hat off and throws it to Swann, who puts it on and then throws it over to the referee so we can get going. They take their time touching fingers to start and finally lock up. We hear about their histories and resumes before Rehwoldt talks about Scotty giving him the Worm before he debuted in NXT.

Swann kicks him into the corner to turn things a bit more serious but Scotty hands in the ropes (ala Andrade) to avoid a trip to the floor. A suplex drops Swann and that means the Moonwalk. The armbar keeps Swann in trouble for a bit but he sends Scotty outside for a change. Scotty is sat in a chair so Swann can run around the ring for a kick to the face.

It works so well that he does it again before cranking on both arms back inside. Scotty fights up for the dancing right hand but Swann is right back with the running flip ax kick. That doesn’t do Swann much good though as Scotty hits the bulldog that sets up the Worm. That sets up the Worm to give Scotty a pretty big upset at 9:20.

Rating: C. This is the definition of a fun main event and that’s all it needed to be. Scotty looked good in the ring and certainly didn’t appear to have anything resembling ring rust, which is more than I would have expected. Not a great match or anything, but I can see why this was something people, including me, would want to see.

Respect is shown post match. Swann goes to leave but hang on, because it is time to dance. Rehwoldt: “The options are yes or h*** yes. Take your pick.” The referee gets to play Rikishi for the big moment.

We cut to Zicky Dice in the back where he wants the stream started over as he rapidly thanks the sponsors to wrap it up.

A highlight reel finally ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a show where it was never going to be a classic but it wasn’t supposed to be. Instead, we got about two and a half hours of fun stuff with some pretty decent wrestling included. It isn’t a show I’ll ever need to see again, but if you wanted a nice start to the most packed day of the WrestleCon schedule, this was a good way to go. Not a great or even a very good show, but they figured out how to have some fun without many resources available and that is a nice trick to pull off.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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