Smackdown – April 15, 2022: Back Next Week?

Smackdown
Date: April 15, 2022
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re back to the blue guys and now the build seems to be on for Wrestlemania Backlash. Last week saw Shinsuke Nakamura come after Roman Reigns to suggest that he is the next challenger while Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey in an I Quit match is officially set. Hopefully we get some built towards those matches this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Roman Reigns sending the Usos after the Raw Tag Team Titles, setting up a pair of matches on Raw.

Here are Raw Tag Team Champions Rated RKBro for a chat. We get a lot of posing before Riddle talks about how stoked he is to be back on Smackdown, especially with his best friend Randy. After going on about Worcester being the name for Worcestershire sauce, but it’s named after the one in England, not this one. He learned that off of a Snapple lid, but Orton cuts him off to get serious. Orton wants the Usos out here right now so here they are for the showdown.

The Usos go on a rant about how this is their place and they’re ready for RKBro because they’re twin brothers who are ready to face anyone. Orton says he loves the family but the two of them are a******. Orton says the Big Dog left the b****** off the leash and “frick that” (his words). We hear about Orton’s career in a more fired up way than usual and the challenge is accepted. The Usos go to leave but come back in to pull Riddle off the ropes for a cheap shot, which Cole calls a hit and run.

Sasha Banks/Naomi talk trash to Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan about Naomi vs. Ripley tonight.

RKBro asks Adam Pearce about the Tag Team Title match but they can only get Riddle vs. Jey tonight, because THAT’S ALL THEY DO FOR TAG TEAM FEUDS.

Naomi vs. Rhea Ripley

Sasha Banks and Liv Morgan are here too because we can’t just have the freaking Tag Team Title match already and have to do a bunch of singles matches first. Ripley powers her into the corner to start and then runs Naomi down with a shoulder for a bonus. A knee sends Ripley to the apron and a big boot knocks her down. Naomi follows her out but gets blasted with a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Naomi fighting up and hitting an ax kick, followed by a bulldog into the corner. A high crossbody gives Naomi two and she faceplants Rhea for two more. Naomi grabs a full nelson of all things but gets powered into a northern lights suplex. The missile dropkick sends Naomi flying for two but she’s back with a Bubba Bomb (that explains the full nelson) into a cradle for two of her own. Ripley isn’t having that though and grabs the Riptide for the pin at 8:44. Banks looking stunned that a monster like Ripley won a match is kind of funny.

Rating: C+. It’s always nice to see Ripley getting a win like this, even if it keeps Naomi looking as middle of the road as possible. That is about all she does most of the time and the Women’s Tag Team Titles isn’t exactly some huge upgrade for her. Odds are the titles are retained on Raw though, allowing us to have Ripley and Morgan split after….a whole six weeks or so as a team?

The Usos don’t answer any questions and head into Roman Reigns’ locker room.

We look back at Happy Corbin turning on Madcap Moss.

Corbin doesn’t like Moss being called his former associate because Moss was more of a hanger on or a gopher. He blames Moss for losing his undefeated streak and now the loss of dead weight is increasing his happiness levels. Just wait until Moss becomes the laughingstock of Smackdown.

Drew Gulak, auditioning to become part of the broadcast team, asks Moss about what Corbin says. Moss says Corbin bought him his suspenders and taught him how to tell his jokes. That’s why the jokes were bad, because having an audience of bald men with a bad sense of humor will kill anyone. He isn’t worried about facing Humberto either and tells them where the Kiss Cam can go. McAfee explains the joke in case the visual didn’t explain it.

Madcap Moss vs. Humberto

Humberto knocks him into the corner so Angel can get in a cheap shot, allowing Humberto to mock the kissing deal. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Moss fights up and hits an elbow to the face. Moss pulls him out of the air for a fall away slam but the running shoulder in the corner hits Angel. Humberto takes one of his own and the Punch Line finishes for Moss at 2:28. Smart to give him a pretty decisive win, but a grudge match against Corbin isn’t exactly enthralling stuff.

Angel yells at Humberto for losing to a joke.

Charlotte comes in to see Adam Pearce but Drew Gulak interrupts to ask about how he did. Charlotte says Gulak can interview her in the middle of the ring and don’t be nervous.

Usos vs. RKBro is set for Wrestlemania Backlash.

Drew Gulak is in the ring to interview Charlotte. Gulak asks if she is ready for a hard hitting interview but is told to just hold the mic. Charlotte talks about how she turned down the I Quit match with Ronda Rousey because she wanted to keep Rousey safe. Gulak mentions that Charlotte tapped at Wrestlemania but Charlotte INSISTS that she was fixing her bra. That’s not good enough for Gulak, who thinks that had the referee been in place, Rousey would be champion.

Charlotte thinks that is out of line and asks if Drew stopped wrestling so he could hold a microphone and ask stupid questions. She thinks everyone here has quit something, but that is nothing she would ever do. Charlotte tells Gulak to get out of her ring but attacks him before he can. The Figure Eight makes Gulak tap (McAfee: “Charlotte Flair even taps out interviewers!”) and shout that he quits until referees break it up.

We recap Sami Zayn running from Drew McIntyre last week.

Ludwig Kaiser narrates a video about the awesomeness of Gunther.

Drew McIntyre vs. Sami Zayn

Sami says he’s going to prove himself here and then runs to the floor to start. McIntyre follows him out and hits Sami in the face (after avoiding punching McAfee by mistake) before taking him back inside. The Glasgow Kiss looks to set up the Claymore but Zayn runs again, this time taking the countout at 2:29.

Drew isn’t happy post match.

Ricochet is ready to defend his Intercontinental Title.

Sami Zayn runs into Adam Pearce, who makes Sami vs. McIntyre III in a lumberjack match next week.

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Jinder Mahal

Ricochet is defending and Shanky is here with Mahal. They start fast with Mahal pulling Ricochet away from the ropes for a crash to the mat. Ricochet fights back up and counters the Khallas into a rollup for two. The Recoil sets up the 630 but Shanky pulls Mahal to the floor. That’s fine with Ricochet who dives onto both of them for the big crash. Back in and the shooting star press retains the title at 2:59. Not quite a squash, but Ricochet needed any kind of a win to get him back on track after the Los Lotharios stuff.

Sheamus isn’t happy with Butch losing last week but the solution is that Butch needs to channel his aggression. They try to convince him that New Day is the enemy…but Butch slips away, because he’s treated like a child for whatever reason.

Post break, Butch, Sheamus and Ridge Holland attack New Day, making me wonder why they bothered with the “lost” deal for all of four minutes.

It’s time for part two of the Lacey Evans story. She talks about how her father caught up with her and her mother and had all kinds of anger and mental health issues. He would yell a lot and throw a bunch of things until he was eventually on the run from an assault charge. That helped her learn how to fight from a young age and she knows how to be at rock bottom. No one can phase her because she has been through worse. This continues to be a good bit too serious for a wrestling angle.

Natalya and Shayna Baszler don’t like Lacey Evans treating them like this because Lacey doesn’t respect legends. Lacey is trying to take over the locker room but here is Raquel Rodriguez to say how happy she is to meet Natalya.

Jimmy Uso vs. Riddle

Jey Uso and Randy Orton are here too. An early RKO attempt is blocked and Riddle gets sent hard into the corner. The early chinlock goes on but Riddle fights up and they go to the floor. A superkick rocks Riddle again and we take a break. Back with Riddle firing off a kick and a knee to stagger Jimmy. The Bro To Sleep into a German suplex gets two but Jimmy is back with a pop up Samoan drop. Randy and Jey get into it on the floor to distract Riddle, allowing Jimmy to kick him down. The Superfly Splash misses though and a pop up RKO finishes Jimmy at 9:02.

Rating: C+. Here we have another example of a pretty good match that meant absolutely nothing. Odds are we get every combination of these four until we get to the pay per view and while the big match will be good, it is going to have been so watered down by all of these singles matches that it will lose a bunch of impact. I would love to see WWE change up their formula a bit, but that just isn’t going to happen.

Overall Rating: D+. This was as ho hum of a regular Smackdown as I can remember in a long time. The wrestling was adequate enough but it felt like a night where they just said “oh throw whatever out there”. Mahal gets a title shot, two tag matches are built up with singles matches, Sheamus N Pals vs. New Day continues, Charlotte beats up an interviewer and a Madcap Moss feature match. No Reigns, no Rousey, no Nakamura after the end of last week’s show. It felt like they took a week off here (and they may have due to the holiday), but you can’t get a pre-taped promo in from someone that matters?

Results
Rhea Ripley b. Naomi – Riptide
Madcap Moss b. Humberto – Punch Line
Drew McIntyre b. Sami Zayn via countout
Ricochet b. Jinder Mahal – Shooting star press
Riddle b. Jimmy Uso – RKO

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 11, 2022: Keep It Going

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 11, 2022
Location: Little Caesar’s Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

We’re back to normal this week as the Wrestlemania Weekend glow is gone. Now we get to see what the regular crowds are like and how they respond to what WWE is offering. At the same time, we get to see how things go when WWE doesn’t have to try as hard. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Cody Rhodes’ return at Wrestlemania and wanting to become the WWE Champion to honor his father.

Here is the Miz for MizTV. Miz wastes no time in introducing Cody Rhodes, though he does make sure to insult the fans a few times. Miz accuses Cody of taking too long to come out but Cody says it has been awhile since he was in front of a crowd like this one. Hang on as Cody gets to pose a bit more and the fans certainly like him. We hear about Cody being the grandson of a plumber but without the Rhodes name, he would just be a plumber. Cody says it would be nice to be a plumber right now because Miz is full of….and he stops himself.

Miz hasn’t changed a bit in years and that makes him reliable. Cody is here to win the Undisputed Universal Heavyweight Championship belt, though Miz points out that it’s a title because a belt holds up your pants. We hear about how Seth Rollins wants a rematch where Cody can’t surprise him but the fans cut off Miz again.

Miz gets in Cody’s face and says he knows where Cody has been for six years but Cody says hold on. He respects Miz and all of his accomplishments but maybe Miz is threatened by him. Cody has enjoyed their chat but he’s looking forward to their match, which will be his first on Raw in six years. Miz goes for the sneak attack and gets sent outside. Cody kept the reaction for another week so they might be on to something here.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Veer Mahaan

Veer runs him over to start but Dominik is up with a superkick. A missed charge sends Veer outside, where he sends Dominik into the barricade. The baseball clothesline drops Dominik on the floor and another does it again inside. The cervical clutch (camel clutch/Gargano Escape hybrid) finishes Dominik at 1:58.

Post match Mahaan puts the hold on again, then lets it go, then puts it on again, leaving Dominik to take a stretcher out.

Post break, Dominik is put into the stretcher.

Veer Mahaan says he strikes fear into the hearts of men.

We look back at Edge and Damian Priest taking out AJ Styles last week.

Styles is scared of what he is going to do to Priest tonight. Priest walks up so AJ gets in a fight with him, with agents having to break it up.

AJ Styles vs. Damian Priest

During his entrance, Priest says he is here to prove that he is worthy of working with Edge. Styles slugs away to start and hits a clothesline to put Priest on the floor. There’s the forearm off the apron to send Priest over the barricade. A whip into another barricade has Priest in more trouble and we take a break.

Back with AJ bleeding from the head but still managing to hammer away. The Downward Spiral plants Styles though but the Reckoning is countered into a Pele. Styles tries the Phenomenal Forearm, which is countered with a kick to the head. Hold on though as Priest drops to a knee and the lights go out. The purple spotlight comes on Priest….and we take another break. Back again with….the match being over, we’ll say at 13:05.

Rating: C. That’s WWE for you. They set up a match but then realize that they don’t want either of them to lose so they get creative and give us whatever this was. I’m sure there is some internal WWE logic behind what happened, but since WWE can’t bother to explain any of this stuff, we’re left sitting here wondering what the heck just happened. More importantly though, I’m left sitting around wondering why I should care if they’re just going to end a match like that.

AJ isn’t happy and says Edge is his no matter what.

Cody Rhodes vs. The Miz

Hold on as here is Seth Rollins at the bell to conduct the crowd in his entrance theme. Miz gets in an early kick to the face but Cody snaps off the powerslam to send Miz outside. Back in and we hit the cravate to hold Miz in place before Cody sends him face first into the buckle. Miz gets in a shot to the face though and the chinlock goes on. Jimmy calls it a beautiful one and Cody is sent outside as we take a break.

Back with Cody hitting a suplex for two, with Miz being sent outside for a suicide dive. They get back in and Cody misses something off the top to damage his knee. The Figure Four goes on and stays on for a good while, but Cody finally turns it over for the break. Back up and the Cody Cutter sets up the Cross Rhodes at 11:50.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of win that can boost Cody a bit: he beats an established name clean in the middle of the ring and starts looking like a force. That makes two matches for Cody and two wins over former World Champions. He has a long way to go, but they are starting off well and that’s more than I would have bet on in this case.

Post match Rollins (who didn’t do anything during the match) grabs the mic and says he heard Cody mention the word REMATCH. Rollins could go for that and Cody accepts the challenge, date to be announced.

We recap the debut of Ezekiel from last week, much to Kevin Owens’ annoyance.

We meet the newest member of the Raw roster: Tommaso Ciampa (thankfully not renamed to Steve Lewis), but Ezekiel comes up to introduce himself. Ciampa is glad to meet him but Owens comes in to say that’s Elias. Ezekiel and Ciampa say not quite and Owens thinks he is the only sane person left around here.

Liv Morgan vs. Naomi

Naomi rolls her down to start and hits a quick kick to the face for an early two. A double jumping kick to the face drops Liv again but she’s back with a rollup. That means a pinfall reversal sequence until Naomi gets a rollup pin at 2:18.

Here is Bobby Lashley in the VIP Lounge despite not being a guest. He barely beat Omos so now it is time for him to wreck this set. Cue MVP and Omos, with the former threatening lawsuits if Lashley breaks anything. Lashley wants Omos right now but MVP says Omos is learning to be a businessman so he’s waiting until the money is right. That’s fine with Lashley, who still wants an explanation from MVP.

Believe it or not, MVP actually gives him one, saying that when he returned to WWE, Lashley was floundering. Lashley had talent but he wasn’t going anywhere so MVP had to save him. Lashley accuses MVP of being on a farewell tour and a lot of yelling ensues. MVP says Omos is going to destroy Lashley, who promises to take Omos down again and then take MVP out. With that taken care of, Lashley throws a bunch of the set out of the ring.

We recap the double engagements in the 24/7 Title shenanigans.

R-Truth, Akira Tozawa and some others have a bachelor party with Reggie, but aren’t happy that Dana Brooke and the 24/7 Title are at a bachelorette party. It’s time to break it up.

Austin Theory asks the bosses for a US Title shot next week. Deal, and you can just call him Theory. Oh screw off. Kevin Owens comes in to take Theory’s place and demands proof that Ezekiel and Elias are different people. That information is confidential (Owens: “HIS LIBRARY CARD IS CONFIDENTIAL????”) so next week, Owens will make him take a lie detector test. With Owens gone, Sonya Deville says she has a deal in place for Bianca Belair’s first title defense.

Bianca Belair vs. Queen Zelina

Non-title. Belair blocks a rollup to start and runs her over but Zelina takes her down for a Last Chancery. That’s broken up with straight power and Belair hits a gorilla press drop. The KOD connects to finish Zelina at 2:08.

Post break, Sonya Deville is in the ring to announce Belair’s first challenger. It wasn’t an easy pick as she had a lot of options, but Belair is ready for anyone. Deville has an open contract and Belair signs without a second thought. The opponent is……Deville herself, who takes out Belair’s knee and hits a running knee to the face.

We go to the bachelorette party, where Tamina agrees to keep the truce with Dana Brooke tonight. After their honeymoons though, it’s open season for the 24/7 Title. Los Lotharios come in for the Kiss Cam but Nikki Ash has a surprise: a pair of strippers, but one of them is a referee. Tamina breaks up the cover and slides Nikki down the bar as R-Truth, Akira Tozawa and Reggie come in. R-Truth gives them a speech about how the love of the title is all that matters. He’s a certified marriage guy (and has a certificate to prove it) and bans all attacks on Dana until after next week’s double wedding. And now, dancing.

Adam Pearce isn’t happy with Sonya Deville but she asks what he can do about it.

Alpha Academy vs. RKBro

Non-title and before the match, Chad Gable brags about his intelligence, his degree, and everything about himself in general. Orton takes Gable down to start and hands it off to Riddle for some kicks to the chest. Otis comes in to run Riddle over though and we take a break. Back with Gable working on Riddle’s arm but Riddle fights up and brings Orton back in to clean house. A rollup gives Gable two but Orton grabs the RKO for the pin at 8:08.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good stuff while it lasted and that shouldn’t be much of a surprise. These teams have done well in their previous matches, though it is pretty clear that the Academy is on their way down. RKBro vs. the Usos is going to be a big deal and they don’t need the Academy there for that kind of a match.

We cut to the back where the Usos arrive. After a break, here are the Usos, with Orton saying the Big Dog let his b****** off the leash. The Usos laugh it off and get straight to the point: they want the title unification match. Riddle thinks that sounds like something out of Avengers with Thanos trying to get all of the crystals together. Cue the Street Profits to interrupt, because they should be at the front of the line. Jimmy: “There’s only one line and it’s the BLOODLINE!” The Profits and the Usos are ready to go and Orton makes the match.

We recap Veer Mahaan taking out Dominik Mysterio earlier in the night.

Street Profits vs. Usos

Non-title and RKBro is at ringside. Ford dropkicks Jimmy down to start and hands it off to Dawkins, who suplexes him onto Jimmy for one. Jey comes in and gets elbowed down for two, only to have Jimmy come back in off a blind tag. A double spinebuster drops Dawkins and a top rope forearms to the chest gets two.

Dawkins tries to fight out of the corner but gets caught with a jumping enziguri. The Usos head outside to glare at RKBro, only to have Ford flip dive onto them. Ford dances a bit as we take a break. Back with Dawkins fighting out of a chinlock, allowing the double tag off to Ford for the house cleaning.

A running Blockbuster gets two on Jey and Dawkins pulls Jimmy to the floor for a right back. Back in and the Doomsday Blockbuster gets two more on Jey. Jimmy cuts off Dawkins’ dive and superkicks him down, only to have the Superfly Splash hit knees. Ford adds the frog splash for two with Jey making the save. Dawkins is sent into the post and it’s the 1D to finish Ford at 15:11.

Rating: B-. This match got the time that it needed to be better and that is what made it work. Again, I don’t think the Profits are going to matter all that much in the picture so it was a good idea to get rid of them here. Go with the Usos vs. RKBro on the big(ish) stage and leave the other teams out of the picture for the time being.

Post match the champs stare each other down and hold up the titles. The Usos leave but RKBro has to take out the Profits. That’s enough for the Usos to superkick Orton down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It wasn’t quite last week, but they did keep some momentum going after the post Wrestlemania Raw. That’s more than I would have bet on with this show as WWE has a tendency to drop down a good bit with Wrestlemania season over. You can see a lot of Backlash being set up and now they have another few weeks to really set things up. I’m cautiously optimistic for the next few weeks though and that is a nice feeling.

Results
Veer Mahaan b. Dominik Mysterio – Cervical Clutch
AJ Styles vs. Damian Priest went to a no contest
Cody Rhodes b. Miz – Cross Rhodes
Naomi b. Liv Morgan – Rollup
Bianca Belair b. Queen Zelina – KOD
RKBro b. Alpha Academy – RKO to Gable
Usos b. Street Profits – 1D to Ford

 

 

 

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Smackdown – April 8, 2022: Cast Change

Smackdown
Date: April 8, 2022
Location: Fiserv Forum, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the first Smackdown after Wrestlemania and maybe something can go a bit better than this week’s Raw. If nothing else, there is always the chance to see who might show up from NXT or elsewhere and that can make for some exciting times. If nothing else, the fans have now had a chance to rest a bit and aren’t likely to get burned out an hour into the show. Let’s get to it.

Here are Wrestlemania Night One and Night Two if you need a recap.

We open with the long recap of Wrestlemania.

Kayla Braxton brings out Ronda Rousey for a chat. We look at Charlotte tapping out at Wrestlemania but winning anyway thanks to a downed referee. Rousey says that her mom taught her that things won’t always work out, but she had Charlotte beaten. Now Rousey wants a rematch, but with no way out. Instead, she wants it in an I Quit match. Charlotte pops up on screen to laugh and say Charlie Sheen’s WINNING. She thinks the Baddest Woman On The Planet deal is a myth so the match….isn’t on. Rousey says the match is taking place and Charlotte is going to scream. That is the logical next step for the feud.

We recap New Day losing to Ridge Holland and Sheamus at Wrestlemania in a minute and forty seconds (on an eight hour, two night event).

Sheamus and Holland tells Butch to take Xavier Woods apart like a chew toy.

Butch vs. Xavier Woods

Ridge Holland, Sheamus and Kofi Kingston are here too. Before the match, Kofi mocks the trio in the ring and says that since Wrestlemania is over, all records reset, so their feud is even again. Woods says that he hit the weights this morning and then called Butch’s mom, who wants him to give her rabies infused nephew.

Woods charges in and gets pounded down but comes back with some chops. Butch starts going after the arm and they head outside, where Woods gets X Plexed onto the apron. We take a break and come back with Woods fighting off the mat and hammering away on the apron. Butch cuts him off with a forearm but Woods grabs a small package for the pin at 8:35.

Rating: C-. So he debuts as a new gimmick, then becomes something of a feral man child, then he loses his debut. Are we sure that moving up to the main roster is a good thing at this point? This is the latest time that WWE has what should be a can’t miss prospect and not only do they manage to start badly, but then they run in the other direction with the thing. Well done, as always.

We recap Sami Zayn vs. Johnny Knoxville N Pals at Wrestlemania.

Sami Zayn goes on a rant to Adam Pearce about being treated like a loser after his match with Knoxville. He has even been sent cheese because of the mousetrap. Zayn wants a match with the next person to walk out of the men’s locker room, so here’s Drew McIntyre. Sami: “Ok the NEXT person to walk out of that locker room!” Pearce makes the match with McIntyre for tonight. Zayn needs some time to think about this and leaves. A stagehand comes in to hand Pearce a note, with Pearce saying to tell the sender that he can’t meet with her right now.

Ludvig Kaiser (Marcel Barthel) introduces the debuting Gunther.

Gunther vs. Joe Alonzo

Gunther chops him into the corner and then stands on his throat. The big boot sets up the chops and the powerbomb finishes for Gunther at 2:03. That’s a good way to debut a new monster.

Raquel Rodriguez (Gonzalez, also from NXT) says you haven’t seen anyone like her. Los Lotharios come up to hit on her but she says not a chance. Kayla Braxton agrees that the two of them are always annoying. There was no reason to keep her in NXT any longer so the move makes sense.

It’s time for Happy Talk with Happy Corbin and Madcap Poss but Corbin isn’t happy. The fact that some of the balloons are messed up and they appear to say CO RATS makes it even worse. Corbin had an honest conversation with himself on his yacht this week and he has come to a realization: it’s all Moss’ fault.

Moss is really sorry but Corbin doesn’t want to hear about Moss’ feelings. Somehow Moss made Wrestlemania Weekend all about himself with the battle royal win. Corbin thinks Moss has forgotten his place, which is tell him a joke. Moss asks what you call him when he costs Corbin a match? Madcap LOSS! Corbin: “That’s terrible. Tell me another one.” The second one bombs too, which doesn’t have Moss looking very happy.

Corbin gives him one more chance to tell a joke like Moss’ job depends on it. Moss asks what you call a guy who treats his friend like garbage and dressed like he’s going to a funeral for Tommy Bahama? You call him Happy Corbin! That’s enough to start the fight, with Moss getting the better of things and knocking Corbin to the floor. Moss even stomps on the hat!

Jinder Mahal rants to Adam Pearce about wanting a title shot when Ronda Rousey comes in to ask about her I Quit match. She’ll get an answer by tomorrow.

Sami Zayn vs. Drew McIntyre

Sami stalls a lot to start but Drew finally grabs him for a ram into the barricade. Back in and McIntyre sends him flying with a suplex, followed by some drops onto the announcers’ table. Zayn teases walking out but gets taken down from behind. The Claymore is loaded up but Sami runs outside again and takes the countout at 3:32.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what to say about something like this, but Sami continuing to be a weasel is still entertaining. The good thing also here is it gave McIntyre a night off, as he was just doing his big moves and standing around while Sami bumped a bit. Odds are we’ll see this again next week and that could be interesting too.

We look back at Pat McAfee/Austin Theory/Vince McMahon/Steve Austin at Wrestlemania.

We get the first chapter of the Lacey Evans Story, talking about how her dad was abusive and ran her mom and her off. Then they lived in campgrounds all their life and worked to get here. She’s a mom, a sister and a United States Marine. It doesn’t make her better than anyone, but they’re not better than her either.

Sasha Banks vs. Liv Morgan

Naomi is on commentary but Morgan explains that she’s on her own. Morgan grabs a rollup for a fast two and then kicks Banks face first into the corner. A middle rope missile dropkick sets up a missed Oblivion, allowing Banks to kick her to the floor. We take a break and come back with Sasha hitting a top rope splash for two but the Codebreaker is blocked.

They go into the pinfall reversal sequence until Banks knees her in the face. Liv is right back with the Codebreaker for the double knockdown. Banks catches her with a knee on top and hits a superplex but throws her legs up so Morgan can grab the small package for the pin at 7:08.

Rating: D+. Most of that is for the ending, as Banks hit the superplex, laid there for a second, and then threw her legs up so Morgan could get the pin. That looked as scripted as you could get and it drives me nuts to see them make it look that bad. Throw in CHALLENGER PINS TAG CHAMPION TO SET UP THE TITLE MATCH and it’s even worse.

We look at Roman Reigns unifying the World Titles at Wrestlemania.

Here is the Bloodline for a chat. Reigns talks about winning the WWE Title from Raw and that doesn’t leave him much to do. There is a lot for the Bloodline to do though, which is why he wants the Usos to go to Raw and bring him the Raw Tag Team Titles so they can be unified too. Cue Shinsuke Nakamura to interrupt but Reigns puts his hand on the microphone. Reigns gets that Nakamura needs something after losing his partner so he’ll show some Bloodline love. That means a hug to Nakamura….and a double superkick from the Usos to end the show. Nakamura vs. Reigns for Backlash works.

Overall Rating: C+. Much like Raw, this show had stuff going on, but it didn’t feel like anything that needed to be seen. This one is a bit higher though, as they announced/at least implied some things going forward. Unifying the Tag Team Titles is a LONG overdue idea and Nakamura vs. Reigns should work out just fine. I like some of the callups too (Gonzalez/Gunther work well) and there is a bit more interest around here. Throw in this being an hour shorter and it was a lot more fun than Raw. Not exactly a classic, but I’m intrigued enough.

Results
Xavier Woods b. Butch – Small package
Gunther b. Joe Alonzo – Powerbomb
Drew McIntyre b. Sami Zayn via countout
Liv Morgan b. Sasha Banks – Small package

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 4, 2022: They Need A New Coat

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 4, 2022
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It is the night after Wrestlemania and I’m not even sure if that means anything these days. This show has a long history of being something special but since that isn’t WWE’s deal a lot of the time, we might be in for a show that is closer to normal. That isn’t exactly inspiring but let’s get to it.

Here are Wrestlemania Night One and Night Two if you need a recap.

Note that I was in the arena for this show, sitting in the upper deck and looking down at the edge of the stage, with the ring to my left and the Titantron to my right.

We open with a long recap of Wrestlemania, as you might have seen coming.

Here is Cody Rhodes, rising through the stage again and walking down a short ramp, to get things going. Cody takes his time getting to the ring and the fans seem happy to see him, though it doesn’t come across as well as it did in the arena. Cody: “So….what do you guys want to talk about?” Forty seven days ago, he became a free agent and has kept silent since then. Rhodes made the decision to return to WWE and it was never a hard choice. It’s a great story of the returning star and he is glad to be back.

He is an avid reader and he stumbled upon this quote: “Sometimes a man finds his destiny upon the path to avoid it.” Rhodes puts up a photo of his dad holding the WWWF Title in Madison Square Garden from September 26, 1977. That is the same title that Hulk Hogan (boo), Undertaker (yay), Shawn Michaels (yay) and HHH (also yay) among others have held over the years. Rhodes talks about how this photo was on the mantle in his parents’ bedroom until his father’s last day.

One day when he was a kid, he asked his dad about being a champion like Hulk Hogan. His dad got serious and explained the championship advantage, meaning that since he won by countout, he didn’t take the belt (yes belt) home with him. That made eight year old Cody decide he was going to win the title for his father.

That hasn’t happened yet and that Dream died right in front of him. Now though, he wants to claim his dream again and his intentions are clear. Rhodes is going to do it for his friends, his fans, and for the American Dream. Cue Seth Rollins to interrupt and they shake hands, with Rollins being very happy and mouthing what commentary says is “welcome home”.

This was a big moment for Cody, but the important point here is that it made sense. Cody didn’t go onto any weird tangent and got his point across (with some impressive sounding words). I can go with the idea, though a Rollins rematch might be on tap first. Good stuff here, and the fans were into Cody. I’m not sure if that lasts beyond Wrestlemania weekend, but it’s a good start.

Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan vs. Naomi/Sasha Banks

Champions Contenders match. Naomi and Ripley start things off with Rhea hitting a rather delayed vertical suplex. That doesn’t get her very far though as Naomi sends her into the corner, setting up a pair of middle rope splashes for two. Banks sends Morgan outside and hits the running knees off the apron, only to have Ripley take Banks down with a flip dive. Naomi dives onto Ripley though and a slingshot legdrop gets two as we take a break.

Of note: during the break, D-Generation X’s music started playing by mistake, confusing all of the wrestlers (the D-Generation X cam was played during a later break, so it wasn’t completely random). Back with Naomi and Ripley making double tags, allowing Banks to hit a top rope Meteora on Morgan. Banks misses a clothesline as Morgan does a Matrix into a rollup for two before kicking Banks in the head. Ripley tosses Banks into Liv’s powerbomb for two but Naomi is back in for the elevated Codebreaker to finish Morgan at 8:57.

Rating: C+. They started picking up the pace near the end and had me believing that the champs were going to lose in their first match after winning the belts. That being said, they don’t exactly have much in the way of challengers going forward and that is a continuing problem for the titles. I can’t imagine it getting much better, but at least Naomi finally had something to do.

Post match Ripley walks out on Liv, with Kevin Owens coming to the ring as she leaves.

Post break, Owens doesn’t seem happy. Maybe he made a mistake on Saturday by challenging Steve Austin to an actual match. He goes over THE PLAN to trick Austin into a match but might have underestimated Austin. Owens admits that Austin is still great, because it takes someone great to beat him. However, it should be noted that he came in with a really serious back injury. Owens: “WATCH THE FOOTAGE! YOU CAN TELL!” He was limping because he was lifting a lot of weird but the WWE Universe needed him out there. Austin’s win should be stricken from the record….and here is someone named Ezekiel.

It isn’t Ezekiel Jackson, but rather someone who looks a lot like Elias, minus his beard. Owens asks Elias what he thinks he’s doing. Ezekiel: “I am not Elias.” Fans: “YES YOU ARE!” Ezekiel says he is Elias’ younger brother and Owens looks like he’s about to lose it. Owens thinks he has beer in his ears because he can’t believe he’s hearing this. Owens hates liars, so Ezekiel thinks Owens hates himself. Ezekiel reminds him of getting stunned, sending Owens into a rant against Enrique or whatever his name is. He has ten seconds to get out of Owens’ ring, but Owens counts down and then leaves instead.

We look back at Miz turning on Logan Paul after the two defeated the Mysterios at Wrestlemania.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz

Rey Mysterio is here with Dominik, who gets hit with the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 26 seconds. Ok then.

Post match here is Veer Mahaan to lay out the Mysterios, including a cross between the Gargano Escape and a camel clutch to Dominik as Rey crawled over to try and save him.

Here is Bianca Belair for her first chat after winning the Raw Women’s Title. Belair thanks everyone for standing behind her because she never thought she would win the title. She takes off her sunglasses to reveal a black eye before talking about how losing to Becky Lynch at Summerslam made her realize how great she can be. Now she knows just how fast you can lose it all.

After a quick pause, Belair talks about how she never cheated but worked to get this title. Lynch went for her throat, her hair and even her eye. After all that though, she is still standing here because these people deserve better. That’s why she became better and will become the best she can be. She’ll fight everyone back there because no one is ready to take this title from her. Lynch needs to take some time and find out who she is, because Belair is the EST of WWE and is ready for anyone. This was the victory lap speech and Belair deserved it.

Video on Bron Breakker.

NXT Title: Bron Breakker vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler, with Robert Roode in his corner, is defending. Breakker drives him into the corner to start and snaps off an overhead belly to belly. Ziggler manages to Breakker outside though and rakes away at the eyes back inside. That doesn’t work for Breakker, who plants him with a powerslam, only to get crotched on top. We take a break and come back with Breakker fighting out of a chinlock but Ziggler nails a chinlock for two. Breakker’s sitout powerbomb gets two more and the comeback is on, including the overhead belly to belly.

Roode’s distraction breaks up the spear so Breakker takes him out with the big flip dive. Ziggler hits a running knee (might have been a mistimed Fameasser), followed by the Fameasser for two. Breakker blocks a ram into an exposed buckle pad but walks into the superkick (how Ziggler retained at Stand & Deliver) for two. Another superkick is loaded p but Breakker spears him down and hits the gorilla press powerslam for the pin and the title at 10:05.

Rating: C+. This is what you were probably expecting at Stand & Deliver so they did get the ending right. Breakker gets two in the title back in front of a big crowd and a much larger audience while showing that he learned something after his previous loss. I’m not sure if he should have lost on Saturday, but at least they got things right in the end.

Here is MVP for a chat. MVP praises Bobby Lashley for beating Omos on his own and brings out Lashley for his celebration. Lashley brags about beating the biggest and strongest opponent he has ever faced. He knew he had to wait for Omos to make a mistake and that is exactly what happened. Cue Omos to shout that he wants a rematch….and MVP turns on Lashley to help Omos beat him down. There’s a twist and it makes sense, as Lashley is a face anyway and doesn’t need someone to talk for him.

Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan make up in the back, as Ripley has gotten them a Tag Team Title shot next week. Thank you for rendering a stipulation completely worthless in about an hour and a half.

Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler

Byron Saxton has a blast reminding Corey Graves that Carmella and Zelina lost their Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania. Actually hold on, as Zelina says Carmella is obsessed with a man who is a fool for wanting to marry her. Zelina: “However, he is a VERY handsome man!” That’s too far for Carmella, who mocks her for only winning the Queen’s Crown tournament. Zelina was going to be in the wedding as the maid of honor, but now she can be a flower girl. The fight is on, with Carmella running over to Graves as Zelina leaves. Carmella kisses him in relief. No match, as Natalya and Baszler never appeared.

We recap Pat McAfee beating Austin Theory at Wrestlemania, only to love to Vince McMahon. Then Steve Austin came out to do Steve Austin things.

Austin Theory isn’t happy with the loss and tells the Usos he’s ready to take his anger out on RKBro and Finn Balor.

RKBro/Finn Balor vs. Austin Theory/Usos

Balor shoulders Jimmy down to start and stomps away. Riddle comes in to kick at the arm and grab a front facelock. That’s broken up so Theory comes in, only to be backdropped to the floor. Riddle kicks him in the face but the springboard Floating Bro is blocked as we take a break.

Back with Riddle fighting his way out of a chinlock but getting caught with a pop up neckbreaker for two. Riddle manages a jumping knee to the face and the hot tag brings in Orton to clean house. The hanging DDT is loaded up on Jey but Theory makes a blind tag and hits a rolling dropkick. Balor tags himself in as well but misses the Coup de Grace. We hit the parade of finishers, with Riddle being superkicked out of the air. Balor hits Jimmy with the Sling Blade, only to walk into the ATL for the pin at 8:14.

Rating: B-. Pretty easily the best match on the show so far as the star power involved helped a lot. That being said, I believe this is the third time that Theory has pinned Balor in as many weeks and I can’t say I’m surprised in the slightest. The US Title has long since stopped meaning anything and this is another good reason as to why. Just let Theory win the title already because WWE actually seems interested in doing something with him.

Here is Edge for a big chat. Edge says he is an honest man. He knew he would beat AJ Styles but he didn’t know Damian Priest would come out to help him. Edge knew that these people would be sheep just like he said they would. Fans: “WE ARE SHEEP!” Edge: “Very telling idiots.” The fans need to rise for the man who respects Edge’s message and the punishment for the guilty: Damian Priest.

After a handshake, Edge asks what got through to Priest over the last few weeks. The fans say they don’t care, but Priest says that doesn’t bother him anymore. Priest says he spent a long time trying to please everyone else, but that made it so easy to pledge his loyalty to Edge. They came to their new reality at the same time, which leads Edge to AJ Styles. He wanted the pitbull AJ Styles and that’s what he got. The thing with pitbulls is that they pick fight over flight, but AJ needs to think of his family.

Cue Styles for the brawl, including taking out Priest and sending Edge into the post. Styles grabs some chairs but Priest gets up, allowing Edge to take Styles down. The Conchairto is loaded up but referees and agents make the save. I can go with the feud continuing, especially if Priest and Edge bring in some friends to uneven the odds even further.

Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy

The Academy jump them from behind to start and the fight is on. Cue Adam Pearce to say let’s make this a Texas Tornado match, which works for the Profits (and lets Corey Graves say “You want to get nuts? Let’s get nuts.” from Batman for some reason). Ford hits the big flip dive onto the Academy on the floor but it’s Otis coming back in to power away.

Dawkins fires off rights and lefts in the corner, leaving Gable to fisherman’s suplex Ford for two. They pair off and we take a break with the fights continuing. Back with Otis loading up the table but he and Dawkins fall to the floor. Ford goes up top but gets crotched by Gable. A superplex is loaded up but Ford shoves him off and hits the frog splash through the table for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C. The Texas Tornado stuff felt tagged on but maybe they realized that the crowd needed to be woken up a bit. This was late in the show and the fans weren’t exactly feeling it at this point but at least they got something energized here. If nothing else, watching Ford do his big jumps and dives is fun and that’s what the show needed.

Here is the Bloodline for the big show closing as they take their time getting to the ring. Roman Reigns says he knows why the people are here but wants Paul Heyman to explain the Bloodline’s success. Heyman lists off the team’s accomplishments, with a focus on Reigns’ box office successes of course. Reigns calls himself the last needle mover because he is always operating at the highest level. He isn’t hanging his hat on this weekend because he is constantly moving forward. This Friday on Smackdown, you’ll find out the next step. Until then, acknowledge him. End of show.

That’s an interesting way to go, as they didn’t really say anything. Maybe they have something planned for Smackdown, but this was ten minutes to say “Reigns won, he’s great, see you Friday.” I’m not sure if that means anything, but it’s quite the wait for nothing substantial.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure what to think on this one. On one hand, it was an improvement over previous years as SOMETHING happened on the Raw after Wrestlemania. On the other hand, it wasn’t exactly interesting stuff. Elias’ younger brother? Veer Mahaan? Breakker wins a title that isn’t on this show? MVP is now with Omos?

It’s ok, but it isn’t something that is going to have my attention for very long. Maybe something gets better next week, but this wasn’t exactly making me want to see where things are going. Cody felt strong and that’s about it. Not a terrible show, but they need something hot and this wasn’t it in the slightest.

After the show was over, Cody Rhodes beat Kevin Owens with the Cross Rhodes in a dark match. Rhodes thanked the fans and talked about how surreal it was to be back to end the night.

Results
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley – Elevated Codebreaker to Morgan
Miz b. Dominik Mysterio – Skull Crushing Finale
Bron Breakker b. Dolph Ziggler – Gorilla press powerslam
Usos/Austin Theory b. RKBro/Finn Balor – ATL to Balor
Street Profits b. Alpha Academy – Frog splash to Gable through a table

 

 

 

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AND

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Smackdown – April 1, 2022: And That’s Why I Wasn’t There

Smackdown
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and that could mean a few things. On one hand, it means we could be in for the last big push before the biggest show of the year, which means an exciting night. On the other hand, it could be WWE putting in as little effort as possible as they have more important things on their minds. Knowing WWE, I’ll go with the latter almost every time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Commentary welcomes us to the show and gives us a video package on Andre the Giant to hype up his namesake battle royal.

Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Tommaso Ciampa, Cedric Alexander, Ivar, Erik, Madcap Moss, Drew Gulak, Shelton Benjamin, Mansoor, Shanky, Jinder Mahal, R-Truth, Akira Tozawa, Reggie, Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez, T-Bar, Damian Priest, Dolph Ziggler, Robert Roode, Finn Balor

This field is lame even by this match’s standards. Only Ziggler, Roode and Balor get entrances. It’s a brawl to start with Tozawa being eliminated, followed by Reggie, who makes the dumb choice of flipping around on the apron. There goes R-Truth, followed by Mahal, the latter of whom goes out at the hands of the Vikings. Benjamin knees T-Bar out and it’s time to start brawling near the ropes. Moss knocks Gulak out as I continue not remembering that Gulak works here.

Cue Happy Corbin to praise Moss but almost low bridges him out by mistake when Balor reverses a whip into the ropes. Ciampa sends Moss to the floor but this time Corbin makes the save. Corbin leaves so it’s time to settle down again. Crews knocks out Alexander and Azeez gets rid of Benjamin. Mansoor’s slingshot neckbreaker is blocked and Ciampa knees him out. The Vikings eliminate Crews but get tossed by Shanky and Azeez, leaving them with the giant showdown.

They fight near the ropes and both get tossed out, leaving us with Priest, Balor, Roode, Moss, Ciampa and Ziggler. Balor and Priest remember that they had a feud for a bit and slug it out until Balor tosses him out. Roode puts Ciampa on the apron and Ziggler hits the superkick for the elimination to get us down to four. That leaves Balor to clean house but he can’t get rid of Roode. Ziggler goes to help Roode but Moss tosses Ziggler and Roode. Balor charges at Moss and gets sent out to give Moss the win at 7:11.

Rating: C-. This was every lame battle royal you’ve seen and that is what the Andre battle royal seems to be. It’s everyone without stuff going on at Wrestlemania being added in to a match on TV, which doesn’t make it feel special. Instead, this feels like a match that WWE has to do and picks a random person to win. Moss is part of a bad angle with Corbin vs. Drew McIntyre, but it isn’t like the match has any history or importance for the most part.

Post match Moss celebrates his win but asks what you should call a battle royal with the smartest Texans. A CATTLE royal!

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Humberto vs. Angel

Ricochet is defending because this is what the title has become these days. Angel and Humberto share an entrance and their chyron says Los Lotharios, which is a bit of a weird way to set up a triple threat. Ricochet gets knocked into the corner to start, with Angel biting his finger. The obvious double teaming begins and Ricochet gets caught with a running knee to the face. Ricochet fights up and manages a double hurricanrana, because that’s something people can do. Angel catches him on top with a super armdrag though and we take a break.

Back with Ricochet having to fight off the numbers game again, which allows the double teaming to take him down. Humberto nails a spinwheel kick for two, which doesn’t sit well with Angel. The Wing Clipper is loaded up but Humberto rolls Angel up for another near fall as greed enters the equation.

Ricochet uses the distraction to crossbody them down, setting up a rolling dropkick to Angel. The standing shooting star press gets two on Humberto with Angel making the save. Humberto gets backdropped to the floor and an enziguri drops Angel. Ricochet drops Humberto onto Angel, setting up the 630. That’s not enough so Ricochet goes straight to Humberto with the Recoil for the pin to retain at 11:15.

Rating: C+. The action was ok, but the fact that it was a relief to see Ricochet beat a tag team to retain the Intercontinental Title tells you everything you need to know. Ricochet at least comes off as a winner to save the slightest bit of face, but he needs a lot more to make up some of the last few weeks. Now he can move on to a singles challenger, but him sitting on the sidelines might be best for both himself and the title at the moment, as WWE doesn’t seem to know any better.

Long video on Kevin Owens vs. Steve Austin. Owens wanted a way to Wrestlemania so he challenged Austin to come on the KO Show. One day Owens remembered that he hated Texas and started insulting it so he wants the embodiment of Texas to show up. Austin responded from what looked to be some road out in the wilderness, which sends us into the Austin highlight reel set to Bawitaba by Kid Rock because 90s.

Naomi/Sasha Banks vs. Queen Zelina/Carmella

Non-title with Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley and Natalya/Shayna Baszler at ringside. Carmella kicks Banks to the floor to start, allowing her to get in some dancing. Zelina hits some running knees in the corner and Carmella is back in for a chinlock. That’s broken up and Banks gets in a shot to the face, allowing her to get over to Naomi for the tag. With Carmella dispatched, a Vader Bomb hits Zelina and Naomi adds the split legged moonsault for the pin at 3:26.

Rating: C-. This was about as filler of a match as you can get as they were thrown out there to set up a match that isn’t going to have much interest no matter what they do. The Women’s Tag Team Titles continue to be absolutely nothing and I can’t even get annoyed at the champs losing two days before their Wrestlemania title defense. Nothing match with nothing teams getting ready for a nothing match. Why is this a surprise these days?

Ronda Rousey was training earlier today (appeared to be with Shayna Baszler) and insisted that she was controlling her anger. She’ll be seeing her baby before the show, where she’ll rip off Charlotte’s arm.

Video on Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey, looking at their respective in-ring/cage careers. Both dominated their sports and now it is a clash of the two titans, which would have been a bit better had they not already had a Wrestlemania match. It is also presented as a battle of holds, with the armbar/ankle lock vs. the Figure Eight. In other words, this sounds better in theory than it has been in reality.

Here is Charlotte for a chat. She praises the video and says it was more dramatic than Coda. She is going to destroy Rousey and, after mocking the WHAT chants by suggesting they are saying WOO, Charlotte declares herself cool. Every woman wants to be like her and every man just wants her. Having people want her autograph and pictures is cool, just like leaving Wrestlemania as the Smackdown Women’s Champion.

Video on Roman reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. I believe they’re fighting soon or something.

Rick Boogs plays Shinsuke Nakamura to the ring so Pat McAfee gets on the announcers’ table….but Austin Theory trips him up. McAfee gives chase to the back, where Theory runs into Vince McMahon’s office. That slows McAfee down but he kicks the door open, with Vince coming out and threatening to fire him. McAfee seems worried and goes back to commentary.

Rick Boogs vs. Jimmy Uso

Shinsuke Nakamura and Jey Uso are here too and McAfee is back on commentary. Boogs curls Uso to start before throwing him down. Jimmy is right back up with a whip to send Boogs into the post to cut him down but Boogs manages to gorilla press Jimmy….from his knees. Boogs stands up and drops him into a fall away slam, because that’s something a person can do. Cue Theory to grab a cup of ice from a fan and throw it at McAfee, who manages to keep his cool. Cue Finn Balor to go after Theory so all six get in the ring for the double DQ at 3:08.

Rating: D+. That gorilla press alone was worth seeing but that’s all they had in such a short match. Normally I would have an issue with WWE doing so many things in one match, but this is a bit of a weird situation. Balor vs. Theory is a feud that has been going on in recent weeks, though Balor isn’t even on Wrestlemania. I’m not sure why they are building feuds for beyond Wrestlemania, but we seem to be ready for a six man tag here to keep it going even further.

Usos/Austin Theory vs. Finn Balor/Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs

Joined in progress with Nakamura getting two on Jey. The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets one but a quick shot allows Jey to get over to Theory. Nakamura knees Theory in the ribs as McAfee is VERY pleased with the fans not liking Theory. Boogs comes in and grabs the rotating back and forth gutwrench suplex for two.

It’s off to Balor, who gets sent outside for a cheap shot from Jey to put him down. The villains glare down at McAfee and we take a break. Back with Jimmy missing a splash in the corner but Jey knocks Boogs off the apron to cut off a tag attempt. Balor hits the basement dropkick to rock Jimmy though and it’s a double diving tag to Nakamura and Theory. Nakamura gets to clean house, including a kick to Theory’s head and the sliding German suplex.

Everything breaks down and Boogs is sent hard into the steps. Balor comes in to clothesline Theory to the floor, setting up the big running flip dive. The Sling Blade connects back inside and it’s the shotgun dropkick to knock him down again. A distraction lets Theory break up the Coup de Grace though and the ATL finishes Balor at 11:29.

Rating: C. I knew this was coming and I still cringed at the pinfall. For the life of me I don’t get why WWE feels the need to do this, but if Theory isn’t US Champion by the end of the next pay per view (at the VERY latest), this is another entry on the long list of stupid things WWE has done. The US Champion shouldn’t be losing most of the time, but this is what, three or so falls he has taken to set up a match he isn’t even in? It’s another case of WWE feeling like they are trying to make things worse for someone they seem interested in pushing. Only WWE, thank goodness.

Post match McAfee gets on the apron to stare Theory down but he manages to keep his composure.

Here are Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss for Happy Talk, complete with a table to hold Angela the sword. Moss brags about winning the Andre the Giant battle royal earlier, but Corbin says he was supposed to do that. Corbin is euphoric and thinks that could be his new name. We look at how he got the sword and Corbin brags about everything he has done at Wrestlemania over the years.

The sword is more of an insurance policy and he could decapitate someone with the thing. How depressing is it to name the sword after McIntyre’s dead mother? Corbin: “What does Drew McIntyre’s sword and his mother have in common? He lost them both.” Cue McIntyre, who knocks Moss out with one shot on the way to the ring. McIntyre grabs a chair and throws it at Corbin’s head (that was smart), causing the sword to fall down. The set is cleared out and McIntyre cuts the table in half.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Back in the ring, McIntyre stable the mat a few times to make fire and pyro go off to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh they didn’t care. It was clear that this was designed to be a way to have a show before Wrestlemania and nothing more. None of the matches were good and a lot of this was about hyping things up. This has been the case for a pretty long time now and that reputation is why I was at other shows on Friday night and the only part I saw that night was at a restaurant between other events. It wasn’t that the show was bad, but rather that it was unimportant and WWE didn’t care. That’s as bad of a feeling that you can have and it was on in full display this week.

Results
Madcap Moss won the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal last eliminating Finn Balor
Ricochet b. Angel and Humberto – Recoil to Humberto
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Carmella/Queen Zelina – Split legged moonsault to Zelina
Rick Boogs vs. Jimmy Uso went to a double DQ when Jey Uso and Shinsuke Nakamura interfered
Austin Theory/Usos b. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs/Finn Balor – ATL to Balor

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two: Leftovers Aren’t Very Good

Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two
Date: April 3, 2022
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 78,453
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith
America The Beautiful: Jesse James Decker

We’re back for night two and that means the other half of the card gets their chance (plus one match from the original night because of timing issues). The main event is the latest biggest match ever as Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar have their unification match to make one World Title for all of…eh maybe they make it to Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

Note that I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the third level off the floor in the end zone corner with the stage on my right.

Jesse Jane Decker sings America the Beautiful.

We get a recap from last night.

Mark Wahlberg narrates the opening video, but unlike last year it’s a fresh one for the second night. Wahlberg talks about how it is tough to do it again so we’re running Wrestlemania back. He hypes up the main event to wrap it up. Again, just having a star do this makes it feel more important.

Here is HHH for a surprise appearance to get things going. After taking a long time to soak it all in (fair) and hugging his daughters in the front row (also fair), he puts his boots in the middle of the ring to confirm his. He does have one thing for us though: WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA! More daughter hugging ensues.

Gable Steveson is presented to the crowd. Again.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

RKBro is defending and these teams have been fighting back and forth for weeks. The champs also have what sounds like a mash up of their themes and that isn’t the best idea. Ford, Riddle and Gable start things off, with the latter giving us some SHUSHING. That doesn’t go well for Riddle, who knocks Gable outside and rolls Ford up for an early two. Ford is back with a running clothesline to drop Riddle but Gable is back in to go after Ford as well.

Everything breaks down and Otis clears the ring without much trouble. The six way staredown leads to three brawls at once but quickly settles down to Ford vs. Gable. That works for Ford, who hits a HUGE running flip dive over the top onto the pile. Gable adds a moonsault onto the same pile and everyone is down on the floor. Back in and Otis runs Riddle over before hitting a splash for no cover, which doesn’t seem to be the best idea. Instead Otis knocks Riddle into the corner and brings Gable back in for two off a northern lights suplex.

Ford comes in with a dropkick to Gable, who monkey flips him over and onto Ford’s own face for two. It’s off to Dawkins to clean house and cover Riddle for two, with Otis hitting a splash to break it up. Riddle knees his way out of an ankle lock and gives Dawkins a Bro To Sleep (that’ll get some reactions), allowing the hot tag off to Orton. Everything breaks down and Orton drops Gable and Dawkins onto the announcers’ table.

Back in and RKBro hits stereo hanging DDTs onto the Profits but the Academy makes stereo saves. The Academy hits a Steiner Bulldog for two on Ford but Otis’ Vader Bomb is broken up. The Profits get Gable up for a Doomsday Blockbuster and another near fall as the fans declare this awesome. Orton can’t RKO Dawkins, who gives him the Sky High. Ford goes up for the frog splash but Riddle springboards in with the RKO to pull him back down. Orton pulls Gable out of the air with another RKO for the pin to retain the titles at 11:30.

Rating: B-. This was a great choice for an opener as the fans love RKBro and the action made it a very entertaining match. It also didn’t overstay its welcome and got out after getting its stuff in. RKBro retaining works here, but that split is coming and it is going to be a heck of a hot feud if they do it right.

Post match the Profits offer RKBro some yum yum juice, but hold on as Gable Steveson is invited in too. Chad doesn’t like that and cuts them off, slapping the cup from Steveson’s hand. That’s too far for everyone else, so Chad is left alone with Steveson. The belly to belly suplex sends Chad flying and drinking ensues. Steveson had to start somewhere.

Remember last night? It happened.

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Omos issued a challenge and Lashley accepted it. Lashley’s kick to the ribs is easily blocked and Omos forearms him down without much trouble. Lashley fights back and tries a suplex, which doesn’t work either. A head vice is broken up so Omos forearms Lashley down again. Some running splashes in the corner connect but Omos misses another one, allowing Lashley to try a failed Hurt Lock attempt.

Omos gives him a gorilla press drop and tells Lashley to get up so the bearhug can go on. A drive into the corner sets up another bearhug but Lashley slugs his way out. More slugging sets up a suplex to drop Omos and a spear to the back does it again. The regular spear finishes for Lashley at 6:32.

Rating: D+. I’m sorry what now? You build Omos up as this unstoppable force and then just have him lose clean in a six and a half minute match? Lashley getting a big win is nice to see and he’s probably in the title picture already, but Omos losing is going to take away just about everything he had. He’ll be around, probably as a bodyguard again, but if they want him as a singles guy (which they might not), this was bizarre. It wasn’t a very good match either, as Omos did a bunch of basic power guy stuff which is hardly interesting.

WWE does charity stuff.

We recap Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn. Knoxville decided he wanted to wrestle but Zayn didn’t like it. This set off a way of pranks/general annoyances, including Zayn eliminating Knoxville from the Royal Rumble and Knoxville putting Zayn’s phone number on a banner in Los Angeles. A match must ensue.

Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn

Anything goes and some of Knoxville’s Jackass friends are in the front row (popular place to be tonight). Zayn wastes no time in hitting the Helluva Kick and knocking Knoxville to the floor where more stomping can ensue. That isn’t enough as Zayn goes after the Jackass crew, allowing Knoxville to spray him with a fire extinguisher. Knoxville busts out some of the weapons but Zayn hits him in the back with the cookie sheet.

A crutch shot does it again and Zayn throws a trashcan at him for two, allowing commentary to get in some Sanford And Sons references. It’s table time…but this one has mousetraps all over it, because of course it does. That takes too long though and Knoxville is back with some trashcan lids to the head. A regular table is loaded up in the corner but Zayn suplexes him through it for two.

The Helluva Kick is cut off by a blast from an air horn, allowing….some other Jackass guy (Party Boy Pawnius?) to come in and take his clothes off. Zayn knocks him outside and kicks him underneath the ring, only to have Wee Man (he’s small) come out and beat Zayn up. Wee Man kicks away at Zayn and hits a slam, setting up a tornado DDT from Knoxville for two. It’s time to bring out something that appears to be a way to launch a boot for automatic low blows, meaning Zayn fights out to break it up.

Zayn goes up but Knoxville pulls out a remote to make pyro go out, causing Zayn to crotch himself. Knoxville grabs a bowling ball to crush Zayn low in the corner and now its taser time. Zayn runs…right into a giant hand which slaps him down. That’s too much for Zayn as he drops Knoxville and goes up, only to get crotched and thrown through the mousetrap table. Back in and Knoxville busts out….a giant mousetrap. Zayn is tased onto it and, after some effort, Knoxville gets it to go off and crush Zayn for the pin at 14:25 (ignore Zayn’s shoulders being on the trap rather than the mat).

Rating: C+. This is going to be a weird one. You know what this felt like? Home Alone as a wrestling match. Zayn was trying to do something but Knoxville busted out so many elaborate traps and pranks (read as violence) to stop him at every turn. Of course Knoxville’s friends were here as they should have been in a situation like this, but it’s much more a big stunt show than a match.

It’s also a good case of something not being for me but having an impact. The stadium was ROCKING during this match and the energy was very high. I don’t watch Jackass and the concept is REALLY not something I care for but the reaction was there and that is why these guys were brought in. Whether it made business sense is hard to tell, but a lot of the fans loved this and that is enough to carry it beyond….whatever it was.

Remember Drew McIntyre beating Happy Corbin and cutting the ropes up with his sword? It happened last night.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Naomi/Sasha Banks vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina

Carmella/Zelina are defending and Naomi/Banks come out in a VERY expensive looking car. Ripley/Morgan have a Batman or Catwoman theme going to at least have something in common. Corey wastes no time in praising Carmella, who is in part of a wedding dress for her entrance gear.

Carmella masks up so Ripley wants to face her. That brings Carmella in but she hands it off to Banks, who actually tries a test of strength with Ripley. With that not working, Banks tries a Backstabber, which falls apart too. Everything breaks down and some dives leave us with Banks vs. Morgan. A Codebreaker staggers Banks and Oblivion drops her but Natalya tags herself in for a save. Baszler comes in to stomp on Morgan’s ankle until an enziguri breaks it up.

Carmella tags herself in as well and everything breaks down and it’s time for the parade of finishers. Ripley’s superbomb is countered into a hurricanrana from Carmella and we get stereo Towers of Doom out of the corners, leaving everyone down again. Back up and Morgan knocks Naomi into Riptide for two with a save being made.

Baszler’s running knee to Naomi’s face gets two with Morgan making the save this time. Carmella superkicks Baszler and Naomi for two each, meaning screaming ensues. Back up and Naomi kicks Carmella in the face, setting up Banks’ frog splash for two. Banks hits a Meteora to drop Zelina on the floor and Naomi elevates Carmella for a Codebreaker from Banks for the pin and the titles at 10:48.

Rating: D+. This was all over the place and as usual, there is no reason to care about these teams. They were thrown together and given next to no story other than “we want the titles too”. I was having trouble remembering who was on what team as they might as well have drawn names from a hat. In other words, it’s a WWE Women’s Tag Team Title match.

Remember Miz and Logan Paul beating the Mysterios and then splitting up after? It happened last night.

Some Dallas Cowboys are here to a mixed reaction.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge wanted someone to step up so Styles did, with Edge saying he wanted the bulldog version of Styles. Then Edge went nuts and beat down Styles with a Conchairto, putting Styles out of action for a few weeks. Now Styles is back for revenge.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles comes to the ring with a pretty nasty cut on the side of his face that has commentary (and me) confused. Edge appears on an elevated throne sitting on a slightly burning platform, which is at least a cool visual (though I thought it was a statue in the stadium). Styles backs him into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. The drop down into the dropkick sets up some armdrags to put Edge in trouble and some kicks to the leg make it worse.

We settle down a bit with some staring before Edge gets sent to the floor. That lets Styles hit a sliding knee but the springboard 450 only hits knees back inside. Edge starts going after the ribs as the pace slows down a lot. The abdominal stretch is broken up but Edge takes him down with a shoulder breaker to change up the pace. Styles hits a right hand but seems to have to stop and pop his shoulder back in. A suplex sends Edge hard into the corner and they’re both down again.

Edge grabs a double arm crank but has to avoid the Styles Clash. That works out well enough for him though as it’s off to an STF to put Styles in more trouble, though he’s straight over to the rope. A slingshot DDT plants Edge for two, though he’s fine enough to catch Styles on top. Styles slips out and gets a torture rack, which he swings over into a powerbomb for two more. Back up and Styles snaps off a German suplex and they’re both down again.

Styles wins the slugout and adds a Pele kick, setting up the Calf Crusher. Edge reverses that into the Crossface so Styles gets to the ropes again. A slingshot Batista Bomb gives Edge two so they both go up top. This time Styles superplexes him down onto the apron, because WE MUST HAVE AN APRON SPOT.

Now the springboard 450 connects on Edge’s back for a delayed two and they need a breather. Back up and Edge misses the spear, setting up the Styles Clash for two more. With nothing else working, the Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up….and here is Damian Priest for a distraction. Styles tries the Forearm but gets speared out of the air to give Edge the pin at 24:32.

Rating: B-. The action was good, but there were so many delays between that action that it was hard to build anything up. It felt like a main event level match and Styles was hardly crushed, but the Saturday version was much better with Seth Rollins and Cody Rhodes doing a similar match. This was by no means bad, but it needed to be about eight minutes shorter to cut out a lot of the down time between moves.

Post match Edge and Priest stare at each other, pose and then leave together.

Tonight’s attendance is 78,453, though the announcer says 77,453. Get it together people.

Sheamus/Ridge Holland vs. New Day

Butch is here with the villains. We see the Big E. injury during the entrances, which isn’t something that should be aired that often (by which I mean ever). In a great touch, New Day wears Big E. style singlets, even in the colors Big E. was wearing when he won the WWE Title. Sheamus and Holland jump them during the entrances and rip off the coats, leaving Butch to throw them around.

Trouble in Paradise hits Holland for two at the bell but Sheamus makes the save. Sheamus has to keep Butch from going nuts though, leaving Woods to drop Holland. The Brogue Kick drops Kingston and Butch distracts the referee so Sheamus can Brogue Woods as well. Holland’s Northern Grit finishes woods at 1:39. So Holland (unintentionally) injures Big E. and then gets the pin here, as Butch is now some near feral boy? Right.

Post match Butch has to be pulled off of Woods again, because Pete Dunne is now a crazy man who needs supervision.

Remember when Cody Rhodes returned and beat Seth Rollins? It happened last night.

We honor the Hall of Fame inductees again…including the Undertaker coming out to wave to the crowd. This is the same thing he did last night and here it is again. On a show that is going to be about eight hours combined over two nights, this gets five minutes.

You can bet on the main event!

You can buy Undertaker gear!

You can watch Yellowstone on Peacock!

Long recap of Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory, which was set up when Vince McMahon told McAfee he could have a match. Then Theory started messing with McAfee, who got serious. For some reason, this required Theory to beat both the United States and Intercontinental Champion but show no interest in winning either title. We do get some very cool clips of McAfee training before he came to WWE, just because he wanted to. That’s some serious dedication, and a Rip Rogers cameo always helps.

Austin Theory vs. Pat McAfee

Vince McMahon comes out to introduce Theory, his new….protege? I guess? McAfee on the other hand gets an introduction from the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders and even punts a football into the crowd during his entrance. McAfee punches him down to start but Theory comes out of the corner with a shot to the throat. A jumping elbow out of the corner and a hurricanrana get McAfee out of trouble as Vince isn’t pleased at ringside.

Theory is back with a snap suplex and then he does it again for a bonus. The third attempt is blocked though and McAfee hits one of his own. They go outside where McAfee does the Rock’s commentary on his own match bit, including a mention of his parents. Back in and McAfee takes WAY too long setting up a Swanton and crashes down hard.

Theory goes up top but McAfee cuts him off and tries a superplex. That’s broken up so McAfee backflips off the top and lands on his feet, only to jump back to the top for the superplex (dang) and a near fall as Cole is WAY behind McAfee here. The Punt misses though and Theory knocks him down again. Theory loads up the ATL…and gets reversed into a rollup to give McAfee the pin at 9:37.

Rating: C+. That’s on quite the sliding scale as McAfee is in his third WWE match and hasn’t been in the ring in well over a year. I know Theory is going to be fine and it’s a special situation, but this doesn’t exactly make him pinning Finn Balor and Ricochet look very worthwhile. Again though, the fans were WAY into this and that’s all that matters in this case. Not a great match, but McAfee has put in the work and looked competent out there.

Post match Vince glares at Theory and looks up at McAfee….who challenges McMahon for a fight right now. Vince takes off the jacket and shirt, revealing his signature wrestling look (which matches McAfee). Cole is panicking as Vince gets in the ring but then gets even worse when a referee shows up.

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

Austin Theory jumps McAfee from behind to start so McMahon hits some clotheslines. McAfee gets fired up though and stares at Vince…until Austin pulls him down and crotches him against the post. Theory isn’t done though as he throws Vince a football. Vince teases punting it into the crowd before punting it into McAfee’s ribs (that didn’t really work, though I don’t think it was supposed to be anything more than a final insult) for the pin at 3:42.

Rating: D+. This was barely a match (Vince wasn’t touched) and I thought about not even rating it. McAfee gets cheated out of the win but much like last night in the main event, the point of this is having him in the same ring as a legend like McMahon. This is probably going to be (and should be) Vince’s last match ever so there is definitely some awesome historical significance, but it was just Vince hitting some clotheslines and taunting. That being said, WHY DID THEY NOT ANNOUNCE THIS IN ADVANCE??? At least Austin made it clear that a fight was coming, but Vince wasn’t even listed in Theory’s corner.

Post match Theory gets to pose and we have the big hug. Theory’s music starts and Vince panics, which is a warmup for CUE GLASS SHATTER as Steve Austin is here (as you might have guessed). Theory goes after him and gets punched into the corner to set up the Stunner. That leaves Austin alone with Vince, meaning it’s time to get scared. Beer is offered though and Vince accepts, despite looking terrified.

They drink together until Austin tries the Stunner, which goes horribly, horribly wrong. Vince basically falls down and then into the ropes, bounces back, and then goes down first, leaving Austin to land on Vince’s legs. Look this up, as it was so bad that I was unable to speak from laughter. Austin has some beers with McAfee, who gets Stunned as well. The big beer bash is on, with McAfee being shown sneaking in a drink while down on the floor. This was one more farewell for Austin, though it’s a good thing the timekeeper had that much beer around.

Remember when Bianca Belair beat Becky Lynch to win the Raw Women’s Title in a pretty great match? It happened last night.

Wrestlemania XXXIX is in Los Angeles.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar in the World Title unification match. They have been fighting for months (this time, as it’s really more like years) and now it is decided that there can only be one World Champion. Reigns and the Usos laid Lesnar out in Madison Square Garden to make this even more serious/personal. What better place than right here?

Universal Title/WWE Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner take all and Reigns has Paul Heyman with him for a very long entrance. Reigns also gets to tell Wrestlemania to acknowledge him so we can get in another catchphrase before we actually start. Hold on again as we need Big Match intros, with Heyman and Lesnar taking care of the work.

Lesnar hammers away to start and drives Reigns into the corner for some shoulders to ribs. Three overhead belly to belly suplexes have Reigns in more trouble and they head outside. That means Heyman has to panic (Heyman: “I love you! It was all Reigns’ idea!”), which is enough of a distraction for Reigns to sear Lent through the barricade (as tends to happen a lot). Back in and Reigns hits the spear for two, followed by the Superman Punch.

That’s too far for Lesnar, who starts rolling the released German suplexes. Lesnar is holding his ribs, but keeps coming back because this is serious. Another German suplex is countered into another Superman Punch and Lesnar is rocked again. Reigns tries another spear but gets reversed into the F5 for two more.

Another F5 is countered with a rake to the eyes and Reigns knocks Lesnar into the referee. A low blow and belt shot cut Lesnar down for two and frustration is setting in. The spear hits Lesnar in the back so Reigns tries it again, only to get pulled into the Kimura. The rope (which is shoved forward by Heyman) is grabbed for the break but they’re both down. Reigns says it’s out, meaning his shoulder, but comes back with a spear for the pin and the unified titles at 12:14.

Rating: C+. This was a slightly extended version of the stereotypical match that these guys have. You had an exchange of finishers and then someone won, which might be a bit exciting but has been done to death in recent years. Reigns winning was hardly a surprise, but it would have been nicer to see it come in a match with some more drama or intrigue instead of the same formula Lesnar has used for so long.

Reigns poses with Heyman and the titles as Lesnar glares at them to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It wasn’t a disaster like last year’s night two, but this was just ok for the most part. The biggest flaw should be obvious: the amount of time that this show spends on recaps or ANYTHING but getting to the matches advertised. I don’t need to see the matches from last night in fairly long recaps, as I was there to see the show live. Contrary to what WWE thinks, it might be a good idea to cut some things out, but that might not let them fill in so much time that they can brag about later.

As for the wrestling itself, nothing really stands out. There are some good matches, but nothing that is really worth going out of your way to see (your individual mousetrap enjoyment may vary). The show felt like such a rehash of last night, with Austin and Undertaker getting that much time each. It isn’t terrible, but I had fun with the first night and this felt like a followup that you didn’t need to watch.

Overall Overall Rating: B-. Overall, the lesson here continues to be simple: Wrestlemania does not need to be a two night event as WWE does not have the amount of content necessary to make it work. There is SO MUCH FILLER on here that it feels like it could have been trimmed down by about four hours. They hit about eight hours combined, and that isn’t even counting in the four hours of Kickoff Shows.

Now that being said, there is more than enough good in here to make it a show worth seeing (or at least flipping through). This year was all about Austin, Undertaker and McMahon, with Reigns vs. Lesnar feeling almost secondary to what Austin was doing. That won’t sit well with some, but the atmosphere for Austin makes up for so much. Trim it down and it’s great, but as it is, it’s just good.

Results
RKBro b. Street Profits and Alpha Academy – RKO to Gable
Bobby Lashley b. Omos – Spear
Johnny Knoxville b. Sami Zayn – Knoxville pinned Zayn while he was trapped in a giant mousetrap
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley, Natalya/Shayna Baszler and Carmella/Queen Zelina – Elevated Codebreaker to Carmella
Edge b. AJ Styles – Spear
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. New Day – Northern Grit to Woods
Pat McAfee b. Austin Theory – Rollup
Vince McMahon b. Pat McAfee – Football to the ribs
Roman Reigns b. Brock Lesnar – Spear

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two (2021 Redo): Five Minutes To History

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two
Date: April 5, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the second half of one of the weirdest shows ever and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. Even a year later, this show is mostly forgotten outside of the main event and I’m curious to see how the rest of it holds up. I was actually surprised by some of what’s on the card as it has completely escaped me over the last year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Natalya vs. Liv Morgan

You know, you don’t have to have a Kickoff Show match if this is as good as you can get. Natalya headlocks her down to start but lets it go for an early standoff. A rollup gives Morgan two and she gets some sarcastic applause for a bonus. Morgan ducks a clothesline with the Matrix and rolls her up for two more, allowing her to get in her own sarcastic applause.

Natalya is right back with her belly to back drop into the step over basement dropkick for two more. The surfboard goes on and Morgan screams a lot but she avoids a charge in the corner to grab another rollup. A Codebreaker gives Morgan two and Natalya’s sitout wheelbarrow faceplant gets the same. The Sharpshooter attempt is countered into a step up enziguri and Morgan grabs another rollup for the pin at 6:22.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as it was going to get with Morgan trying one rollup after another to little avail until the ending. Morgan always seems like someone they want to push to the moon but can’t figure out how to get there. This win isn’t going to be some game changer, but at least they gave her something, even if this was nearly depressing as a way to start the night.

Stephanie McMahon gives us a quick welcome.

We get the same still pretty great pirate parody opening video.

Rob Gronkowski talks about knowing a thing or two about dropping the hammer on a championship Sunday.

NXT Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending and it’s a shame that she didn’t get the big moment after the pretty cool video of her walking into the empty Raymond James Stadium. We get the recap video after Charlotte’s entrance, as Charlotte won the Royal Rumble and Ripley threw her hat in the ring, meaning it was time for Charlotte to go after the NXT Women’s Title again. Ripley looks a bit weird in blue tights but Wrestlemania has had some strange choices over the year.

Charlotte takes her down to start and we hit the trash talk in a hurry. Ripley seems to be favoring her knee as they lock up and Charlotte drives her into the corner. The chops, with more trash talk, have Ripley in more trouble but she comes out with the Riptide for a quick two. That’s enough to send Charlotte outside for a breather so Ripley follows her out with an elbow to the face.

A flip dive off the steps takes Charlotte down again and Ripley sends her face first into the mat back inside. Ripley gets two more off a snap suplex and it’s time to kick Charlotte in the back. The bodyscissors stays on the ribs but Charlotte gets in a shot to the leg for a breather. Another kick to the knee has Ripley in trouble and Charlotte twists it around to make things even worse.

The leg is wrapped around the post but Ripley comes back with a belly to back faceplant. Ripley is back up with some good knees to the face, setting up a dropkick to a kneeling Charlotte. A lot of shouting at the knee drives Ripley on but Charlotte sends her to the apron for another kick to the knee. Ripley catches her on top for an electric chair faceplant but Charlotte hits her in the face. The knee to the knee in the corner misses though and Ripley scores with a missile dropkick, which bangs up the knee even more.

Charlotte is back up with a chop block but Ripley grabs the legs for the Prism Trap (such a cool name). That’s reversed into a Boston crab but Ripley powers out into a pinfall reversal sequence. Back up and Ripley scores with a big boot for two and frustration is setting in. Ripley takes her up top but gets shoved down, only to get the boots up to block the moonsault. Charlotte hits a spear for two so it’s time for the Figure Eight for the tap and the title at 20:27.

Rating: B+. This felt like a battle and a struggle, which is exactly how it should have felt. They made it feel important, but I really can’t get behind the idea of Charlotte winning here. It’s like she came in and showed NXT how little they mean compared to the main roster. Charlotte has won everything there is to win in WWE, so why did she need to win this too? Ripley needed this win a lot more than Charlotte, but that has never stopped WWE before.

Long video on night one.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Lana is here with Lashley and this might be the greatest example of “what a difference a year makes” in recent memory. Black has horns on his shoulders because of course he does. Lashley powers him around to start and then does it again to make his point clear. A leg dive doesn’t work for Black as Lashley supelxes him down and hammers away.

Lashley misses a charge and falls out to the floor but Black misses the middle rope moonsault, earning himself a suplex. There’s a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner, setting up a neckbreaker to drop Black again. Black knees his way out of the delayed vertical suplex but Lashley snaps off a powerslam for two more.

Now the suplex can connect for two but Black is back with kicks to the legs. Another kick puts Lashley on the floor and now the middle rope moonsault connects. Back in and Lashley hits a crossbody of all things for two but Lana gets on the steps for no logical reason. The Dominator is loaded up but Lana demands a spear….which charges into Black Mass to give Black the pin at 7:16.

Rating: C. Not a bad back and forth match here but the ending didn’t do it many favors. Lana and Lashley was an idea that went on too long and pretty much never worked but WWE didn’t seem to get the idea for a good while. Then there’s Black and egads what happened with him? He had a nice push in the spring and summer but then it just all fell apart later on, because WWE. I don’t get it either, because he just pinned a big star clean here and then WWE just gave up.

Bayley and Sasha Banks aren’t worried about the five way tonight. They are united to keep Bayley’s Smackdown Women’s Title because they are best friends. Bayley leaves but when asked if she wants to win the title, Banks says we’ll see.

We look at Mojo Rawley winning the 24/7 Title last night.

Rob Gronkowski wants the 24/7 Title.

We recap Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. Otis and Mandy Rose seem to have a thing for each other but Ziggler doesn’t get it. Then he and Sonya Deville got together to split them up before they could get together, with Mandy getting together with Ziggler instead. The Smackdown hacker intervened and shows the plot, meaning Mandy and Otis can be on the same page once Otis deals with Ziggler. Yeah this was kind of nuts but it was funny and oddly charming.

Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler

Sonya Deville is here with Ziggler, who is chased outside before the bell. Otis splashes him in the corner to start but Ziggler is right back with a superkick to the floor. A posting gives Ziggler two back inside and we hit the choke. There’s a dropkick for two more and the choking moves to the ropes this time. The jumping elbow sets up something like a rear naked choke, which Otis breaks up in a hurry. Otis starts the jiggling and hammers away, including the running clotheslines.

A slam lets Otis step on Ziggler’s back and a whip into the corner puts Ziggler down again. Otis sends him outside for a whip into the barricade, followed by a posting for a bonus. Back in and a pop up World’s Strongest Slam has Ziggler in trouble and Sonya demanding that he get up. A Sonya distraction lets Ziggler get in a low blow and they’re both down for a bit. Cue Mandy Rose (you knew this was coming) to slap Sonya and hit Ziggler low, setting up the Caterpillar to give Otis the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing beyond a Smackdown level match but I was stunned by the result. I really would never have bet that Otis would have beaten Ziggler so well done on the surprise ending and going the right way. There was no logical reason for Ziggler to win here, which was exactly why I would have expected it. Otis and Mandy were never going to be a long term angle, but for a one off moment, this was very well done.

Post match Otis picks Mandy up and they have their first kiss, which would have been a great moment with a crowd.

We recap Edge vs. Randy Orton. Edge returned in the Royal Rumble for the huge surprise, where he eliminated Orton. This made Orton ask if Edge wanted to reunited Rated RKO one more time, only to surprise Edge with a big beatdown. With Edge gone, Orton gave his wife Beth Phoenix an RKO, which was treated like the worst thing ever, because Beth went from a Hall of Famer to a damsel in distress. Orton explained that he was doing this to save Edge from turning into what Orton had become, even if it meant ending his career all over again. Makes wrestling sense and it set up a Last Man Standing match, so who am I to complain?

Edge vs. Randy Orton

Last Man Standing and dang it must be awful for Edge to put in all that work and his Wrestlemania entrance is in front of an empty building. Orton runs in from behind (thanks to the classic cameraman disguise) with the RKO and the referee has to ask Edge if he wants to do this. That’s an of course so Orton hits another RKO for an early nine. They head outside with Orton hitting him in the face with the camera for seven so let’s go backstage.

It’s off to the gym first with Orton using a strap from a gym machine (in a moment whose accidental significance went completely over my head live) to choke him but Edge gets back up and hits him with a chain. Edge hammers him onto a table and then into a chair to pound away even more. We go aerial as Edge grabs a machine and uses it to pull himself up and land on Orton in the chair. Edge shouts about nine years but gets whipped into a wall to put him down.

Orton can’t quite crush him with a sled so Edge sends him into some equipment. They fight into a rather narrow hallway where Orton goes face first into a garage door. That’s only good for six though as Edge wants to beat him up some more. It’s back into the arena now with Orton throwing Edge into the barricade. Edge uses said barricade to pull himself up at nine so it’s time to go backstage again, this time to the office area. They take turns ramming each other into a board room table until Edge sends him face first into a wall.

Orton is thrown onto the table and Edge pulls himself up on the….whatever the chain link stuff is above the table to drop an elbow. We lose a cameraman so another has to run in to catch them in a storage room. Orton staggers away with his left arm pretty banged up, but he is able to knock Edge onto an anvil case. They go through more stuff with Edge finding some chairs, which Orton throws away in a hurry. A whip into a bunch of stuff gives Orton nine and they wind up in what loos like an interview area.

Edge gets in a few more shots of his own, including a kick to the ribs, and they’re both down for a breather. With Orton knocked onto a table, Edge climbs a ladder onto a scaffold and drops a huge elbow through Orton through said table for a double eight. It’s time to stagger around some more, this time with Orton’s shoulder bleeding. Orton sends him into more equipment for another eight and then takes him onto the back of a covered pick up truck.

The hanging DDT onto said cover gives us another double eight and they climb onto the top of a big production truck. Edge cuts off a Punt with the spear for nine but another spear charges into an RKO. With Edge getting up again, Orton drops down and grabs some chairs to take back to the top of the truck. Orton sounds like he mentions Edge’s daughters but the Conchairto is countered into a standing choke. That’s enough to knock Orton out but Edge says stop counting. The Conchairto crushes him for good and Edge wins at 36:40.

Rating: B-. I liked this one way more the first time around as this really did feel long here. They had some good violence and beat each other up but you easily could have cut out ten plus minutes and done the same thing. You also get into the same problem that so many Last Man Standing matches have, in that you spend so much time waiting on the counts that the match loses a lot of steam. I still like it, but cut this stuff down.

Back in the arena, Mojo Rawley runs from the menagerie of numskulls but Rob Gronkowski dives off a balcony onto the pile to win the title. Apparently this took HOURS to film as Gronkowski wouldn’t do it, even after Vince McMahon himself demonstrated the dive (the video released of Vince doing it is kind of awesome).

Raw Tag Team Titles: Austin Theory/Angel Garza vs. Street Profits

The Profits are defending and Theory is a last minute replacement for an injured Andrade, just to hammer home how messy this show is. Zelina Vega is here with the challengers too. Dawkins headlocks Theory to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. The champs start taking turns on the shoulder but Theory sends Dawkins outside. That means Garza can hit a superkick, allowing him to come inside and TAKE OFF HIS PANTS.

Some kicks to Dawkins’ ribs set up a seated abdominal stretch but Dawkins flips out without much trouble. Ford comes in to clean house and there’s the big flip dive onto Theory (and Dawkins by mistake). Back in and Garza kicks Ford down, setting up a Lionsault for two. The Wing Clipper is countered with an enziguri though and the hot tag brings in Dawkins. Theory catches him with a quick TKO but Ford comes in with the frog splash to give Dawkins the retaining pin at 6:23.

Rating: D+. There was a very firm limit to what they could do here with no real feud between one of the teams hadn’t even been together for a week and they didn’t even have seven minutes to do their thing. It felt like a Raw match and in this case, that is about as good as you could have expected. The Profits were brand new champions here and as usual, there weren’t exactly a ton of teams for them to challenge them. Take away one of the only ones around and how good could this have been?

Post match the beatdown is on but Bianca Belair runs in for her debut and takes out Vega.

Titus O’Neil has taken over hosting duties, meaning he says he’s hosting.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi

Bayley is defending under elimination rules and Naomi’s entrance is still cool even in an empty arena. Everyone goes after Tamina to start because it is Wrestlemania season and therefore she matters again. With Tamina knocked to the floor, the other four pair off until Bayley and Banks double team Evans for two. The mini tag match breaks out with Lacey and Naomi hitting stereo dropkicks for stereo near falls.

Tamina (sorry, the POWERFUL Tamina) gets back in to wreck everyone and gets a few near falls. Bayley and Lacey are kicked to the floor, leaving us with a Team BAD reunion, assuming more than about 4% of the audience actually remembers that weird trios period at the start of the Women’s Revolution. Tamina gets double teamed down and it’s a parade of finishers to get rid of her at 6:26 (because Tamina is Andre the Giant at Wrestlemania).

With the unstoppable monster stopped, Bayley starts beating on everyone else with the trash talk thrown in for a bonus. Naomi comes back in to beat up Bayley and Banks at the same time, including a Rear View to Banks and a middle rope kick to both. That’s about it for the Offense though as the Bank Statement makes Naomi tap at 10:15. Bayley: “DANCE TO THE BACK!”

Bayley and Banks double team Lacey, including something like a double powerbomb for two. A running knee (Bayley: “THIS IS FOR SUMMER”!, meaning Lacey’s daughter) hits Banks by mistake and the cracks seem ready to form. The distraction lets Lacey hit the Woman’s Right to finish Banks at 13:26 (with Cole’s call being heard on the replay, because the building is that quiet).

So it’s one on one with Evans hammering away and grabbing a neckbreaker for two. Bayley sends her shoulder first into the post though and the stomping ensues. More shouting and right hands in the corner have Lacey in trouble but she gets up a boot to cut Bayley off. The slingshot Bronco Buster connects and the double springboard moonsault gets two. Cue Sasha with a Backstabber to Lacey though, allowing Bayley to hit the bulldog driver to retain at 19:18.

Rating: C. It worked well, even after the awesome force that is Tamina was gone. At least these four have some backstories and characters so it is a little bit better than having five random people in there doing all of their spots as fast as they can. Bayley retaining is fine enough, as she has a tendency to do well at Wrestlemania, though Lacey winning the title would have been a nice feel good moment.

Wrestlemania 37 is in Los Angeles. I’m sure.

We recap John Cena vs. the Fiend in the Firefly Funhouse Match. Cena returned a few weeks ago and didn’t a Wrestlemania match but the Fiend showed up to point at the sign (because THE FIEND has to point at the sign) and the challenge was on. Bray Wyatt then explained that this is fallout from Cena beating him at Wrestlemania XXX, which is what send Wyatt completely over the edge and led to the creation of the Fiend. It makes enough sense and that’s all it needs to do for the most part.

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Cena does his full entrance and we cut to the Funhouse, where Wyatt says Cena will be fighting himself. Cena follows him through the door and I guess we’ll say the match starts there. With Cena standing in the dark, Puppet Vince pops up to ask if Cena has the ruthless aggression to be a star. If not, he’s fired. Bray appears in the ring and calls out someone for a fight and here’s Cena in his 2002 gear to say RUTHLESS AGGRESSION (ala his debut against Kurt Angle) but he can’t hit the slap on Bray. Wyatt: “You can look but you can’t touch!”

Bray disappears and we hit the Saturday Night’s Main Event intro (yeah don’t bother to try and make sense out of some of the pieces of this). Bray does a Hulk Hogan impression (behind a piece of the big blue cage of course) and talks about how his partner Johnny Largemeat is all about the muscles. Cena, lifting weights, comes in and does a Hogan/Randy Savage hybrid impression. He lifts so much his arms won’t come up anymore and now it’s off to the Dr. of Thuganomics Cena.

Wyatt and Cena are in the ring again with Cena realizing that he can only speak in rhyme. We get a Husky Harris joke and Cena talks about taking chances. That’s too much for Wyatt, who calls Cena a bully to takes others’ weaknesses and turns them into jokes. Cena throws the nuts at Wyatt, who knocks him out with a chain. Now it’s cult leader Wyatt and we go to the Wrestlemania XXX match, which Wyatt calls his grandest failure. Back in the ring now, with Wyatt saying it is time to rewrite his own story.

Bray hands Cena a chair (again ala Wrestlemania) and tells Cena to fix his mistake. This time Cena swings….and now we’re on Nitro, with Bray as Eric Bischoff to introduce the Hollywood Hogan version of Cena. Puppet Vince: “IT’S SUCH GOOD S***!” Cena freaks out and realizes he is beating up Huskus the Pig. The Fiend pops up behind him for the Mandible Claw and, after hearing Cena calls Bray overhyped and privileged, Sister Abigail finishes at about 13:30.

Rating: A+. This is one of those things that was amazing live and then it gets even better when you have a chance to think about the thing. This was a huge deconstruction of the entire John Cena legacy, down to what would have happened if he had finally turned heel like so many people wanted him to.

It turns into a What If/Road Not Taken idea and that is amazing to see, as Cena really does have a detailed and incredible rise to the top. Wyatt sees him as a fraud who has done everything he can to hold others, including Wyatt himself, down and he needed to avenge his Wrestlemania XXX loss. This was outstanding and one of the most well thought out and incredible ideas that I’ve seen WWE ever present, and I’m probably missing big parts of the whole thing.

Titus O’Neil isn’t sure what he just saw.

We recap Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar. McIntyre was the Chosen One but screwed up and got fired, so he reinvented himself and came back to WWE as a man. Then McIntyre won the Royal Rumble, eliminating Brock Lesnar in the process. Cue the title match, as McIntyre is finally ready to achieve his destiny.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and for once, Paul Heyman doesn’t’ handle his introduction. Drew hits the first Claymore for the first two count at 17 seconds. Another Claymore is countered into the German suplex, followed by a second for a bonus. There’s the third and McIntyre is in trouble. The F5 gets one (that’s Drew’s thing) and another gets two. There’s a third F5 for another near fall (Heyman: “He’s really good. Hit him again! He can’t keep kicking out all night!”) but McIntyre escapes the fourth. Three straight Claymores make Drew champion at 4:32.

Rating: C+. It was fun and energetic but I’m completely over watching this style. It has been done to death and I could go for something fresh. Is it asking too much for a ten minute match instead of ten finishers in four minutes? McIntyre winning was the only way you could go here as Lesnar has been champion for so long recently that it no longer has any impact. This went as it should have, but egads find a better way to do them.

McIntyre celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this one better than the first night by a good stretch as the matches certainly felt bigger. The main event and some other things came off like they belonged on Wrestlemania, but there are still things that make this show feel like absolutely nothing. Again though, you can only put so much of that on WWE as they were up against the wall and had to do a lot of things at the last minute. It was good if you give them a lot of breaks and really, how can you not with a show like this?

Overall Overall Rating: C+. Of course this didn’t feel like Wrestlemania and that is because it barely was Wrestlemania. The problem is that with so much build and setup for the whole thing, WWE absolutely had to do something, especially if television was going to continue as usual. No it isn’t good by comparison to other Wrestlemanias but nothing was the same around this time. Things would get better going forward but this was still the dark ages of the pandemic. They did what they could here and in that regard, this show worked out as well as it could have.

Ratings Comparison

Liv Morgan vs. Natalya

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C-

Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Original: C+

2021 Redo: B+

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C

Dolph Ziggler vs. Otis

Original: D+

2021 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Edge

Original: B

2021 Redo: B-

Street Profits vs. Angel Garza/Austin Theory

Original: D+

2021 Redo: D+

Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Naomi vs. Tamina vs. Lacey Evans

Original: D

2021 Redo: C

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Original: N/A

2021 Redo: A+

Brock Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: D

2021 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2021 Redo: B-

Overall Overall Rating

Original: C

2021 Redo: C+

That’s one of the biggest changes I can remember having as the matches almost all went up and then the overall rating barely goes up. This was hardly a normal show though so the drastic swing a year later isn’t surprising.

Here is the original review if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/04/05/wrestlemania-xxxvi-night-two-the-wwe-psyche/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVI (Night One): Small Crowd Man

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night 1
Date: April 4, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
Host: Rob Gronkowski

A year has passed since this show and it still does not seem real. Aside from the main event, this show has almost been erased from history as it is barely ever discussed whatsoever. The Coronavirus wiped everything out and the show was moved to the Performance Center, making it feel like a show that they had just to say they had it. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cesaro vs. Drew Gulak

Their respective friends (Shinsuke Nakamura/Sami Zayn and Daniel Bryan) are feuding so these two are having a match as well. Yeah it’s weak but what else are they supposed to do? Cole is calling this one on his own and it sounds so strange. Gulak goes for the arm to start but a short armscissors is countered into a powerbomb. They head outside with Cesaro getting in another shot but the arm is banged up.

An armdrag on the bad arm sets up a whip into the steps but Cesaro uppercuts him out of the air for two. A Fujiwara armbar is broken up so Gulak settles for two off a sunset flip. Cesaro boots him in the face and loads up a torture rack airplane spin (with no hands at one point for a crazy visual) before just dropping Gulak for the pin at 4:27.

Rating: C. The match was fine but EGADS this is bizarre. It’s like we’re watching a training session that was recorded and they slapped a Wrestlemania logo on the thing. It was watchable enough and would have been acceptable as a warmup but I can’t believe that this is Wrestlemania. Of course it isn’t on WWE given the circumstances but my goodness this is weird and that isn’t likely to change over the course of the show.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show and says that while this is going to be the most different Wrestlemania ever (due to the current circumstances, with no mention of the virus, which was a weird WWE thing for a LONG time).

Rather than someone singing America the Beautiful live, we get a montage of previous performances. Fair enough and actually a pretty cool idea.

The opening video continues the pirate theme but someone doing a pretty bad Jack Sparrow impression cuts it off, saying it sounds like they are starting at the end. He says the video isn’t trying and calls for the “classic movie trailer voice”. The trailer voice is cut off by the Sparrow impression (which is how he refers to it) but the video still doesn’t work, so he says go to the shots of our heroes looking all serious. These people are larger than life and are marred by the work of hundreds of days and nights.

This is their quest for gold, glory and immortality. Tonight, forget EVERYTHING you know because fate leads the way, and fate can surprise us. History waits for no one and tonight, their chance to shape history begins right now. The traditional montage takes over from here. I love pirate movies and while this was pretty much a parody of the idea, it makes me wonder how good the real thing would have been with the WWE budget behind a pirate themed show.

Host Rob Gronkowski (erg) welcomes us to the show and does some fine script reading as he talks about how this is a two night event. He talks about being able to start a party on a Saturday night, even if that might be a little difficult in a mostly empty building. Mojo Rawley joins him because you need the hype here. Gronk gives him some pretty lame chops and we’re off to the first match.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. Kabuki Warriors

The Warriors (Asuka/Kairi Sane) are defending and commentary points out that they took the titles from Bliss/Cross back in October. This is their first title defense since DECEMBER, because the titles really don’t mean much in WWE. Asuka and Bliss get things going with a lot of laughing but it’s off to Sane without any contact. Sane shoves Bliss around a bit, drawing Bliss back up to knock Sane down. That sets up the double knees to the ribs and a tag off to Cross, who is taken into the champs’ corner.

Some forearms stagger Asuka though and Bliss tags herself in. That means a baseball slide can knock Sane outside, followed by a flip dive from the apron. Back in and Asuka punches Cross in the face, allowing the tag back to Sane. Everything breaks down again with the Warriors taking over on the floor. Back in again and a bulldog into a basement dropkick rocks Cross but Sane gets a bit cocky.

That means Cross can kick her away, allowing the tag back to Bliss. House doesn’t have time to be cleaned though as Asuka offers a distraction, allowing Sane to catch Bliss in the ropes. The Alberto double stomp gets two and Bliss is in trouble, despite Cross trying to get….well no one here to clap. The referee yells at Asuka, allowing Sane to snap Bliss’ neck across the ropes.

Bliss forearms Asuka in the face so Asuka kicks her head off. Another shot from Bliss allows the hot tag to Cross, meaning it’s a lot of screaming as she forearms and bulldogs Sane. A high crossbody gives Cross two but Sane gets in a cheap shot from the apron. The Reckoning gets two on Asuka with Sane breaking it up off a top rope elbow (and possibly with a camera edit because that count looked ready to go down before Sane appeared).

Asuka tries the Asuka Lock on Cross but Bliss breaks it up with Twisted Bliss. Back up and Asuka hits a Codebreaker on Cross but the Insane Elbow is broken up. Instead it’s a powerbomb/top rope forearm to knock Cross silly….for two. Nikki avoids a charge to send Asuka into the post. The Reckoning sets up another Twisted Bliss for the pin and the titles at 15:11.

Rating: C. That was a lot longer than I would have bet on but the title change was the right way to start. If nothing else, just so Bliss can do her pose with a title again. You can only have the Warriors hold the title so long before it stops meaning anything due to a lack of defenses. I can’t imagine this makes a huge difference, but it was the right move here.

Sami Zayn brags about taking the Intercontinental Title from Braun Strowman, even though people thought it was inevitable that Strowman would destroy him. Tonight, people think it is inevitable that Daniel Bryan will take the title from him, but we’ll see about that.

King Corbin vs. Elias

This is fallout from Corbin knocking Elias off a platform here in the arena. That should have, you know, broken most of his bones, but instead it put him out for eight days. Corbin insists that Elias isn’t here but the comeback is here before the referee can even start to count. Corbin goes outside to start the fight in the aisle so Elias blasts him in the back with the guitar.

Elias sends him into various things and they head inside for the opening bell. An elbow to the face gives Elias two and it’s time to choke near the ropes. Corbin tosses him over the top and wants the countout but settles for right hands to the ribs back inside. The slide underneath the rope in the corner clothesline gets two on Elias and it’s time to hammer on Elias’ bad shoulder (because he has a bad shoulder after crashing off the balcony last week).

Said bad shoulder goes into the post for two and Corbin yells at the referee, which you can hear a lot more of in the empty arena. Back up and Elias sends him shoulder first into the post to even things up a bit. A kick out of the corner sends Corbin into another corner and Elias hammers away. Elias has to roll through the top rope elbow and charges into Deep Six for two. Back up and Elias nails a jumping knee to the face but gets sent throat first into the ropes. A rollup with feet on the ropes gives Corbin two but the referee catches the cheating and yells a lot. Instead Elias grabs a rollup and tights for the pin at 8:52.

Rating: C-. That’s one of the least interesting matches I can remember in a long time, but what were you expecting given who was in there? It’s bad enough that Elias’ big revenge was a rollup pin after getting beaten down for a few minutes, but the fact that it came over Corbin made things even worse. Just not an interesting match and it would have felt a lot better as the nothing Kickoff Show match instead.

We recap Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch for the Raw Women’s Title. Becky Lynch has been champion for about a year and is out of people to face. Baszler showed up from NXT and….bit Becky’s neck for some reason, drawing a bunch of blood. Then Baszler demolished the Elimination Chamber match to become #1 contender (in other words she beat up a bunch of losers and Asuka), setting up Lynch’s biggest challenge in a long time. Lynch reminding Baszler that she beat Ronda Rousey to get the title was a great response and this was a heck of a build.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler

Lynch is defending and drives to the arena in a semi truck because…something about the Man I guess? They go straight to the slugout to start and the threat of the Kirifuda Clutch sends Becky bailing out to the floor. Baszler is sent into the steps to put her in trouble, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. Lynch comes up favoring her back but hammers away in the corner anyway.

A hard knee rocks Lynch but she slips out of the Kirifuda Clutch to grab a rollup instead. Baszler grabs a cutter for two but can’t hit a running knee. They fight to the apron with Lynch talking trash as they forearm it out. Lynch Rock Bottoms her onto the apron for two and the champ looks a bit surprised.

Baszler slams her off the top and grabs a quickly broken cross armbreaker. Instead Baszler puts on her own Disarm Her but Lynch is out in a hurry. This time Lynch grabs the Disarm Her on the ropes, only to have Baszler knock her off the rope for a big crash. Baszler picks her up for a hard swing into the announcers’ table (geez that always looks rough) before throwing it back inside. The Kirifuda Clutch goes on but Lynch backflips over for the pin to retain at 8:32.

Rating: C. Yeah I’m not sure I get this one, as Lynch was ready to lose the title and Baszler seemed primed to take the thing from her. Throw in the Lynch was about to go on maternity leave (fair enough that she didn’t know it at this point) and there was no reason to not switch the title here. It seemed that they were setting up a submission rematch, but at some point you need to just change the title and be done with it, which should have been the case here.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan, with Drew Gulak, is challenging and Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura are here with Zayn. Rob Gronkowski and Mojo Rawley do the YES chant from the balcony, which just looks sad with two people in there. Sami bails straight to the floor and then does it again to get in Bryan’s head. Back in and the third exit ensues, which finally causes Bryan to go after him, only to have Cesaro and Nakamura get in the way.

Gulak dives onto the two of them and hammers away, meaning Gulak and Zayn get to have their own staredown. Bryan finally gets his hands on Zayn thanks to a suicide dive and it’s time to crank on the leg. Zayn is sent outside again for another suicide dive, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. Bryan slaps him in the face and shouts that Zayn is the loser because he hasn’t beaten anyone.

The running dropkick in the corner might have Zayn crying (JBL: “You shouldn’t be crying at Wrestlemania.”) but he cuts Bryan’s charge off with a shot of his own. Back up and Bryan hits the running clothesline, followed by the rapid fire strikes. Hold on though as Bryan needs to go after Cesaro and Nakamura, only to dive into the Helluva Kick to retain Zayn’s title at 9:18.

Rating: C. Another rather disappointing match here but again, it’s kind of hard to complain about much on this show. The biggest problem continues to be the lack of time, as you can only make a match feel so big in just over nine minutes. It’s also another situation where the title should have changed hands, as Zayn went home because of the virus (fair) and had to vacate the title without wrestling again in nearly six months.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: John Morrison vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jimmy Uso

Morrison is defending for Miz and John Morrison and this is a ladder match. Injuries and virus concerns took away enough of the partners that this is as good as we can get here. Everyone misses a kick to start and Morrison and Kingston both stick the landings on a monkey flip attempt, meaning it’s an early standoff.

Everyone goes out to grab a ladder (Morrison gets the only regular sized one) and they all climb up, with Jimmy being knocked down and coming up clutching his knee (always a good sign). He’s fine enough to get to his feet but Kofi dives off the ladder to take him down. Morrison is right there to go after Kofi but they both miss kicks and takedowns. Kofi knocks Jimmy off the ladder but Morrison takes him down as well, meaning Jimmy has to make a save of his own.

A springboard lets Kofi dropkick both of them through the ladder (cool), only to have Morrison clear the ring again. Morrison stabs Jimmy in the knee with the ladder but Jimmy sends him face first into the ladder in the corner. That’s fine with Morrison, who knocks him onto the ladder and hits a corkscrew flip to crush Jimmy again. Kofi is back up with a springboard hurricanrana to pull Morrison off of the ladder, because of course he can do that.

After knocking Jimmy outside, Kofi hits a big dive over the top to take Morrison down again. Jimmy tries to run the barricade so Kofi throws the ladder at him for another knockdown. It’s time to bridge the ladder between the ring and the apron, which never winds up going well. Jimmy is laid on said ladder but Morrison walks the rope to get from one corner to another and Spanish Fly Kofi off the top.

That leaves Morrison down so Jimmy can hit a Superfly Splash to crush him all over again. Kofi and Jimmy climb the same ladder (with Kofi climbing from inside because he’s a bit unique) and Jimmy gets knocked off in a heap. Morrison gets knocked down as well and Kofi comes off with the jumping double stomp to make it worse. Back up and Jimmy bridges the ladder between the rope and the standing ladder (uh oh) and then sends Kofi face first into the bridged one.

Morrison gets superkicked out of the air so Jimmy goes up another ladder, only to be shoved down. It must have been quite the fall as he went down with his feet facing the entrance and landed with his head facing the entrance. Or maybe WWE just needs better editors. Morrison throws a ladder out and goes up, only to have Kofi climb the same ladder. Jimmy is back in to climb another ladder and they all get a hand on the titles. A double headbutt knocks Morrison down….and he comes up with the titles for the win at 18:33.

Rating: B. This was the big spotfest match that you knew was coming here at one point or another on the show and there is nothing wrong with that. They did their thing all over the place here with one crazy spot after another. That’s how a match like this is supposed to be and it was as fun as you could have imagined a triple threat match for the Tag Team Titles would be. Granted there is one thing wrong with the match, which would be the horrible knee injury that Jimmy suffered, which would keep him out of action for over a year.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens. Rollins is doing his evil messiah deal and Owens doesn’t want to hear it, nor does he want to deal with the beatdowns Rollins and company have given him. Grudge match time.

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

Dig that KO Mania IV shirt with the Andre the Giant/Hulk Hogan style as Owens continues an awesome tradition. After a quick bit of hiding in the ropes, Rollins starts the slugout and it goes about as badly as you would go. Owens hammers him down, shrugs off a kick to the face, and hits a hard clothesline. There’s a backsplash to crush Rollins but it’s too early for the Cannonball.

Some chops have Rollins in trouble on the floor but he manages a backdrop on the apron to avoid a rather painful powerbomb. A Falcon Arrow on the apron plants Owens again as Rollins is already focusing on the back. Rollins hits a hard suicide dive to knock him into the barricade and he does it again for a bonus. Back in and Rollins keeps the trash talk up but misses a pair of Stomps. Owens doesn’t miss a DDT though and a superkick lets him hit the Cannonball.

The Stunner is countered and Rollins nails an enziguri, only to have Owens nail a rebound lariat for another knockdown. A superplex is loaded up but Rollins blocks it, setting up the buckle bomb. Some superkicks rock Owens, who is still fine enough to hit a pop up sitout powerbomb for a close two. They go outside and Rollins blasts him in the head with the ring bell for the DQ at 10:09.

And no this isn’t what we’re doing because Owens says let’s keep it going with no countout or DQ. That’s fine with Rollins and the bell rings, allowing him to hit a jumping knee to the face. Rollins takes it outside again and sends him into various things, followed by a steps shot to the face.

A bunch of chair shots have Owens in big trouble but he comes up with a HARD bell shot to the head. With Rollins mostly done, Owens climbs onto the big WRESTLEMANIA sign and dives off, though he is nice enough to ask if Rollins thinks this is a Wrestlemania moment. Back in and Rollins tries to talk his way out of trouble, earning himself a Stunner for the pin at 17:15.

Rating: B-. I didn’t remember liking this one all that much but they beat each other up rather well and it was entertaining enough. The bell to the head sounded great and the violence was good, once you got part the pretty worthless pause in between the falls. Owens can brawl with the best of them, but unfortunately he got hurt here too and would miss time of his own, because this show is cursed.

R-Truth comes up to Mojo Rawley and Rob Gronkowski and complains about being 24/7. I think you know what happens here and Rawley celebrates with the title.

Paul Heyman scares the heck out of Charly Caruso and talks about how great how sure he is that Drew McIntyre is losing. Brock Lesnar is going to destroy McIntyre and leave him a broken man because Lesnar is the most awesome fighter ever. He gets the message across with a bit more emotion as you might guess.

We run down the night two card.

Smackdown World Title: Braun Strowman vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending and there is no recap because there is no story. Goldberg won the title in Saudi Arabia so he could lose to Roman Reigns here, but then Reigns pulled out due to the Coronavirus concerns (again, fair). After about twenty seconds of staring each other down, Goldberg kicks him in the ribs and hits an early spear.

Strowman is back up so Goldberg hits two more spears for a near fall. Make it four, but the Jackhammer is countered into a powerslam. We’ll make that two powerslams and the third sets up a fourth to make Strowman champion at 2:11. The entire match was three moves and one of them was a kick to the ribs.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angeles. Just like it was in the Memorial Coliseum in 1991.

We recap AJ Styles vs. The Undertaker. Styles didn’t like Undertaker being a broken shell of himself so he insulted Undertaker the man, including Undertaker’s wife. This did not wind up going well and for the first time, it seems that this is Mark Calaway fighting instead of Styles, which should make things all the more interesting. Oh and they’re in boneyard to make things a little spicier/more cinematic.

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

The hearse rides into the boneyard and the druids pull out the casket, which of course has Styles in it for a chuckle worthy moment. In a bit cooler moment, we get Biker Taker again, riding to the boneyard to Now That We’re Dead by Metallica. AJ wastes no time in talking trash, asking if Michelle McCool knows Undertaker is out this late. Undertaker knocks a brick out of his hands and the fight is on, with Undertaker dragging him around. He even calls AJ Alan to make it more freaky.

AJ is sent into the closed casket but Undertaker’s punch goes through the hearse window (cue the Goldberg flashbacks). He is fine enough to throw him through the windshield and they fight on top of the hearse, with Undertaker still getting the better of things. Undertaker hammers away while yelling at AJ to not talk about his wife and then quotes Clubber Lang by saying he has a lotta more. AJ gets smart by throwing dirt in the eyes and then trying to punch Undertaker into a grave.

It turns out that standing in front of someone who can’t see and talking a lot makes you easy to punch so Undertaker drills him in the jaw. That’s enough to knock Undertaker into the grave but the Good Brothers show up, complete with imitation western music. Undertaker goes after them….and we’ve got druids for some reason. They don’t really do much good though, as they stand there while Undertaker goes in a circle punching them. Now Undertaker can beat up Gallows and Anderson in peace, including beating on them with the handle of a shovel.

AJ is back with a tombstone (the stone, not the move) though and shatters it over Undertaker’s back. That means trash talk from AJ and weird sounds from Undertaker….and they are both knocked through the wall of a shed. Undertaker wheezes and backs away, allowing AJ to break a shove over his back to knock him into a grave. With Undertaker down, AJ jumps in the dump truck (or whatever you call it)….and Undertaker appears behind him in a big ball of light. Eh it’s not that insane really.

AJ runs off (as you should) and climbs onto the roof of the barn so Undertaker shoots fire out of the roof foo. Cue Gallows and Anderson so Undertaker beats them up again and throws Gallows into the abyss. A Tombstone onto the roof drops Anderson and Undertaker says it’s just him and AJ. For some reason AJ swings at him and gets chokeslammed off the roof and through a big piece of wood. Undertaker climbs down and asks AJ what his wife’s name is. Or maybe AJ can tell Undertaker how old he is.

AJ is out on his feet as Undertaker picks him up and talks about how AJ is tougher than he gave him credit for. It’s time to go to the grave and AJ says he’s sorry. Undertaker wants to know what for and then picks AJ up by the throat. AJ begs him not to bury him and Undertaker hugs him while saying AJ put up a great fight. Then Undertaker boots him into the grave and fills it in with the dirt. The gong sounds and we’ll say that’s the match at about 19:12 (your individual times may vary).

Rating: A. Yeah this is still great and is the pinnacle of the cinematic stuff. It doesn’t get too goofy (I mean, Undertaker stuff is weird by definition) and it felt like two guys having a fight. AJ being all cocky and sure of himself until he finally realized what he was up against is a classic Undertaker story and it worked well here. Above all else, this felt like Undertaker having one last brush with greatness before hanging it up and I can see why he was ok with this being the big ending. Go out doing something different and special, which is what he did here. I loved this when I watched it and still do here, so well done.

AJ’s gloves hand sticks out of the grave as Undertaker gets on his bike, throws up the fist to make the fire go off again. Undertaker’s symbol goes up on the barn wall and he rides away to end the show. And to end Undertaker’s career it seems, as he has not wrestled since and announced his retirement at Survivor Series about seven months later.

Overall Rating: B-. Like I said at the beginning, this show has kind of been forgotten and it is easy to see why. I’m not sure how you could expect anything else here, as the show was cobbled together from whomever was left and they did what they could to still have a Wrestlemania. It’s a Wrestlemania in name only for the most part, but it isn’t like they had any control over the thing. What we got was good enough, but don’t expect this to be anything more than an historical curiosity, because it doesn’t feel like Wrestlemania.

Ratings Comparison

Drew Gulak vs. Cesaro

Original: C

2021 Redo: C

Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. Kabuki Warriors

Original: C

2021 Redo: C

Elias vs. King Corbin

Original: D

2021 Redo: C-

Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch

Original: B-

2021 Redo: C

Daniel Bryan vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

2021 Redo: C

Jimmy Uso vs. John Morrison vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: B

2021 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C

2021 Redo: B-

Goldberg vs. Braun Strowman

Original: N/A

2021 Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

Original: A+

2021 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C

2021 Redo: B-

Mostly in the ballpark, but it’s not like this is a show that is going to feel the same after a year.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/04/04/wrestlemania-xxxvi-night-one-broken-undertaker/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Monday Night Raw – March 28, 2022: They Missed The Point

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 28, 2022
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole

It’s the last Raw before Wrestlemania and since this company doesn’t have the best ideas, that means this is Wrestlemania Raw. Hopefully that means we get some juice added to what has already been set for the card, because this isn’t looking like the strongest Wrestlemania so far. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Brock Lesnar to get things going (with Michael Cole being heard saying “yes sir” during his entrance). After a look at Lesnar taking over Roman Reigns’ dressing room on Smackdown and beating up a bunch of security, Lesnar gets to do his own introduction. Lesnar: “That might have been good but it sounded like it sucked.” We are on the way to Wrestlemania so Lesnar is going to give us his game plan for his match with Roman Reigns.

They are going to go down memory lane in Suplex City and then go to the carnival. Reigns is taking a ride on the F5 and no one survives that. After that (and mocking the WHAT chants by saying Steve Austin will be there too, even if he couldn’t beat Lesnar), they’re going to a wedding. Their titles are getting married and having a baby, but Lesnar gets sole custody. See you on Sunday. For someone who doesn’t do this very often, that was at least an original promo and Lesnar sounds like he is having a blast.

Here is Miz for his match with Rey Mysterio, but first he wants to introduce us to the greatest luchador of all time: LUCHA LOGAN! This would be Logan Paul in a stolen Rey mask, with Miz explaining how horrible it was to take Rey’s mask. Cue the Mysterios, but Dominik gets ejected before the bell for jumping Miz.

Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

Logan Paul is here too and an early distraction lets Miz take it to the floor. A DDT on the floor drops Rey and we take a break. Back with Miz ripping at Rey’s mask but getting sent off the top so Rey can hit a top rope seated senton. Rey seems to tweak his knee so Miz grabs a slingshot powerbomb, which is countered into a sunset flip to give Rey the pin at 5:25. Ignore Miz’s shoulder being up.

Post match Dominik is back to steal the mask back from Paul. He also helps beat up Miz, with a double 619 and some frog splashes with his dad. Paul looks on without doing anything to help.

Veer Mahaan is here next week.

We look at Seth Rollins attempting to find a path to Wrestlemania and going a bit nuts at his failures.

Earlier today, Rollins was summoned to Vince McMahon’s office, because he was going to get a Wrestlemania match. Rollins was told to be there at 7am but didn’t get in until after 9 for no apparent reason. He was rather excited anyway and put his feet on the table, which didn’t sit well with McMahon.

After being told he wouldn’t be fired, Vince tells him that he didn’t have to jump through all of those hoops. All he was going to have to do was ask but he would have to have his own main event. McMahon says Rollins is going to Wrestlemania against an opponent of his choosing, who he will not know until he is in the ring. Rollins runs around the office.

To recap, after a month of this idiotic story involving Rollins desperately trying to get to Wrestlemania, all he had to do was ask the boss and everything was going to be fine. That is about as lame of a conclusion I could think of and that means I’m not even surprised that they went that way.

Omos vs. Viking Raiders

Erik gets hit with a clothesline to start and rolls outside…..where it’s a countout at 45 seconds. That clothesline was the only move of the match.

Post match, Omos kicks Ivar in the face. Omos is asked about wanting a Wrestlemania opponent….and Bobby Lashley is back. A shove sends Lashley into the corner and he bounces off of Omos. Lashley shoves him away and knocks him down with a flying shoulder. Omos bails to the floor so they can both point at the sign, setting up a Wrestlemania match.

Reggie proposes to Dana Brooke and she says yes. Tamina comes in to try and win the 24/7 Title but Reggie makes the save. Reggie and Dana leave so Akira Tozawa pops up to propose to Tamina as well. She threatens to hit him but then says yes, though he has to wedge the ring on her finger. R-Truth, watching from about five feet away (with binoculars of course), has an idea.

Here is the Bloodline for a chat. After having Pittsburgh acknowledge him, Roman Reigns talks about how he has met Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania before. Lesnar beat him up and left him so bloodied that his family didn’t want him in this business again. Well now we have changed the game. Reigns has taken the advocate and made him a wise man, he has taken the moniker of the longest reigning champion in 35 years and now he is taking the title. Now he is making it personal, because it has always been personal to Reigns. This was the intense Reigns and he was awesome in the role, as usual.

We recap Carmella/Queen Zelina having issues.

Carmella and Zelina seem to be fine during their photo shoot. They remember taking out Shayna Baszler and Natalya, so here are the two of them, with Shayna saying just stay in line tonight with the eight woman tag. Then they’ll take the titles at Wrestlemania.

The Steiner Brothers are going into the Hall of Fame.

Sasha Banks/Naomi/Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina/Shayna Baszler/Natalya

Natalya takes Liv down and tries an early Sharpshooter but gets caught with a headscissors into the corner. Ripley comes in with a basement dropkick to Natalya and it’s off to Zelina instead. Naomi and Banks hit running corner dropkicks and it’s time for the parade of shots to the face. We take a break and come back with Banks knocking Carmella down and making the VERY slow crawl over to Naomi, with Baszler managing to run in for the save. A stretch muffler keeps Banks in trouble but the villains get in an argument. Graves checks on Carmella and it’s the Backstabber into Riptide to pin Vega at 9:19.

Rating: D+. The women’s division is becoming more of a mess every week, as there are almost no stories to be seen aside from the title matches and women being either best friends or hating each other. It feels like the whole thing is designed to be as low level as possible and that makes matches like this, where no one gets to shine, all the worse. I’m not looking forward to the title match, and Carmella/Vega retaining will make it even worse.

We look back at Kevin Owens’ Steve Austin impression from last week.

Video on Steve Austin, set to Bawitaba by Kid Rock. In 2022.

Here is Kevin Owens to talk about how the Kevin Owens Show with Steve Austin will be the main event of Wrestlemania. Owens talks about how Austin is here to have one more talk about the old days instead of a fight, because it has been NINETEEN YEARS since he had a match. They’ll have a beer together at Wrestlemania, even though Owens hates it. Then Owens can finally receive the torch of having the best Stunner in the world because it is better than Austin’s. Owens hits Austin’s catchphrase to wrap it up. He was feeling it here, as has been the case since the segment was announced.

Austin Theory vs. Ricochet

Non-title. Ricochet kicks him down to start and hits a standing shooting star press for an early two. The ATL is countered and Ricochet dropkicks him down as the fans want Pat. Ricochet goes up top and gets crotched, setting up the ATL for the completely clean loss at 1:44. I guess there was just no one else in the world that Theory could beat.

Commentary talk about HHH suffering a cardiac moment, which has led to the end of his in-ring career.

Here is Bianca Belair, returning from a throat injury (And doing her dance, because SHE MUST DANCE!) and ranting about how Becky Lynch has knocked her down over and over again but there is nothing that can keep her down. Belair is going to keep fighting no matter what and come back every time.

So Belair will be waiting for her on Sunday, but here is Becky to interrupt. Becky gets in a chair shot and pulls out some scissors to cut Belair’s hair. That takes way too long of course, so Belair reverses into the KOD. Another KOD leaves Becky laying again….so Belair hacks off Becky’s hair. Belair leaves so Becky wakes up and snaps as the fans tell her she deserves it.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Becky Lynch is asked her thoughts about Bianca Belair. Becky: “Bianca, you b****!”

Drew McIntyre vs. Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss

Corbin and McIntyre shove each other to start but it’s off to Moss, who gets hammered down in the corner. An overhead belly to belly and a neckbreaker drop Moss, allowing McIntyre to nip up. Corbin walks off and the Claymore finishes Moss at 1:45.

Post match Corbin jumps McIntyre and steals Angela the sword.

Edge is sitting at a desk with a scale next to him. Edge talks about how he wasn’t sure what to do to AJ Styles so he pulled off the veil of mediocrity. Sunday is AJ’s judgment day, so Edge puts a ring on the scale and smiles.

Post break, AJ Styles says if Edge wants the pitbull, that’s what he’s going to get at Wrestlemania. AJ is going to give Edge a beating that he will never forget on Sunday.

Usos vs. RKBro

Non-title with Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura at ringside. The threat of a double RKO sends the Usos bailing to the floor to start so it’s a double belly to back drop onto the announcers’ table. We take a break and come back with Riddle suplexing and backsplashing Jimmy for two. A Samoan drop cuts Riddle off though and the stomping has him down in the corner.

Orton gets drawn in as Riddle gets caught with a cheap shot as the beating continues. Riddle is taken outside for a whip into the timekeeper’s area as we take a break. Back again with Riddle fighting up again and managing the tag to Orton. House is cleaned and the snap powerslam plants Jey. The hanging DDT connects as Riddle takes out Jimmy on the floor. The RKO is loaded up but the Street Profits run in to jump RKBro for the DQ at 15:25.

Rating: C+. I was pleasantly surprised by the ending there as I would have bet on one of the teams taking a loss. The DQ is the right call to protect both champions so this could have been worse. It’s still weird to see a match like this as the main event on the go home show for Wrestlemania, but you have two good teams and the most popular act on Raw, so it went fairly well.

Post match the brawl is on with Boogs and Nakamura brawling to the back with the Usos. RKBro gets it together to take out the Profits with an RKO each.

One more Wrestlemania rundown ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This year’s Wrestlemania is missing emotion. Reigns vs. Lesnar and Austin vs. Owens have been well set up, mainly because it feels like there is emotion. Other than that and maybe one or two other matches, the show feels like it has all been thrown together in something resembling a major event. Almost nothing feels like it has been given time to develop, with celebrities being added in to make up the difference.

Instead of matches I feel like I need to see, it feels like people are doing things to each other and then they’ll do something big at Wrestlemania. That was on full display here, as two matches were added to the card tonight, plus other matches where some people didn’t even appear. As usual, the action was good but everything else just came and went with no particular reason to get interested. That shouldn’t be the case with any show, let alone the one designed to get me to want to watch Wrestlemania.

Results
Rey Mysterio b. Miz – Sunset flip
Omos b. Viking Raiders via countout
Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley/Sasha Banks/Naomi b. Shayna Baszler/Natalya/Carmella/Queen Zelina – Riptide to Vega
Austin Theory b. Ricochet – ATL
Drew McIntyre b. Happy Corbin/Madcap Moss – Claymore to Moss
RKBro b. Usos via DQ when the Street Profits interfered

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Monday Night Raw – March 21, 2022: Call It A Fluke

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 21, 2022
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton

There are two Raws left before Wrestlemania and that means WWE needs to really hammer things home. That is how it should go at least, but you never can tell with what this company is going to do. I’m sure Seth Rollins will be all Wile E. Coyote with one dumb idea after another on his way to his ultimate goal of doing anything at Wrestlemania so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the glass shattering and it’s….Kevin Owens, in an Austin shirt, jean shorts, and a bald cap. Owens does a good enough Austin impression as he insults the crowd for falling for the gag and promises to destroy Austin once and for all at Wrestlemania. Then the glass shatters again, but fool me once and all that, as Owens gets to laugh at the people.

After another threat to Austin, Owens calls for some beers (Steve Austin lagers of course) but can’t catch them. Therefore he yells at the guy to bring them into the ring and Stuns him before pouring some lager over him. You could write this step by step from the second the glass shattered and that’s how it should have been. Sometimes you need to play it by numbers instead of going nuts and screwing something up and they got it as right as they could here.

We look back at Seth Rollins going a bit nuts last week and losing to Kevin Owens for the rights to interview Steve Austin at Wrestlemania.

Rollins doesn’t like the suggestion that he isn’t going to Wrestlemania and starts laughing maniacally. Ignore the CODY chants as he steals the microphone.

Mysterios vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Miz is on commentary as Dominik grabs a springboard wristdrag out to the floor. Back in and a powerbomb/neckbreaker combination puts Dominik down so Rey comes in for the save attempt. The Mysterios clear the ring for stereo dives to the floor and….here’s Seth Rollins. He wants a Wrestlemania spot and he is going to get one, even if his mic keeps giving out out.

Rollins wants the biggest thing at Wrestlemania that will live forever but since his mic gives out, we take a break. Back with Rollins gone and Rey fighting out of a superplex attempt. Dominik comes back in with a high crossbody to Roode, who is right back with a spinebuster for two. The frustration sets in, allowing Dominik to hit a 619 into the frog splash for the pin at 9:30.

Rating: C-. You can only get so much when a large section of the match was spent on looking at Rollins fighting with the microphone. The Mysterios are a team that should make sense on paper but they just aren’t clicking no matter how WWE presents them. That is a problem that WWE is going to have to deal with somehow, but I’ll take it over Dominik getting a singles push at this rate.

Post match Ziggler hits Rey with a superkick and Miz grabs a Skull Crushing Finale on the floor. Miz even steals the mask and the fans freak out as Rey covers his face with a towel.

Seth Rollins is with Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce and explains that he wants to do something at Wrestlemania. Pearce says this isn’t the way to go about it but maybe there is something he and Deville can do. Rollins laughs and walks off.

Miz is on the phone when he is interrupted to be asked about stealing the mask. It turns out that Logan Paul was a big Rey Mysterio fan growing up and he just wanted a mask. The lesson Paul needs to learn is to never meet your heroes, because they can be horrible. Now it is time for Paul to beat up his heroes at Wrestlemania, but first, Miz dares Paul to wear the mask next week on Raw.

Smackdown Breakdown, this week all about Brock Lesnar trying to destroy the Bloodline.

Omos vs. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez

Crews and Azeez jump him before the bell but Omos grabs them by their throats on the floor. They get back in for the opening bell, with Omos hitting a one armed slam. The chokeslam to Crews sets up the double pin at 1:45.

Post match Omos promises to dominate anyone at Wrestlemania.

Video on Edge’s recent trip over the, uh, edge.

Here is the returning AJ Styles for a chat. AJ talks about how he has been gone for a few weeks and that much time is a dangerous thing. He has been watching that clip of Edge attacking him over and over and now he has to see Edge with his mood lighting, asking why. Styles doesn’t care because all he wants to do is kick Edge’s teeth down his throat. Instead, he gets Seth Rollins, who, after hearing the CODY chants, says that rumors don’t make moments.

Rollins has an idea: AJ stays at home for Wrestlemania and Rollins ends Edge’s career instead! Styles passes on the idea, saying that if he can walk, he’ll be facing Edge. This is just like last week when Styles wanted to take Kevin Owens’s spot, sending Rollins into a rant about how he’s running out of options. Styles isn’t cool with everything going on with Rollins right now so here are Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to interrupt. Pearce says Rollins is getting one more chance at Wrestlemania, because if he can beat Styles tonight, he can face Edge instead. Styles clears Rollins out in a hurry.

Carmella is on her phone again when Queen Zelina interrupts. Zelina doesn’t think Carmella is taking their Wrestlemania title defense seriously but Carmella blows her off. Instead Zelina throws the phone away and tells her to get her head in this. That’s good for a slap and the brawl is on.

AJ Styles yells at Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about their decision but promises to win anyway.

Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Shayna Baszler/Natalya

Ripley takes Baszler down to start and it’s off to Morgan, who gets pulled into the wrong corner. Natalya comes in and drops Morgan down, allowing Shayna to crank on the arm. Cue Carmella to cry to Corey Graves about what happened to her as Morgan fights out of the corner. Baszler pulls Ripley off the apron though, leaving Natalya to hit Morgan with the discus lariat. The Hart Attack gives Baszler the pin at 3:48.

Rating: C. This is where the title match at Wrestlemania is going to fall apart (because it means so much in the first place): since there are so few teams in the division, they are going to have to face each other and knock one another down, leaving no one worth anything once we get to Wrestlemania, where Zelina and Carmella likely retain anyway.

Post match Carmella beats up Baszler and Natalya before posing with Queen Zelina, who approves so hugging can ensue.

We look at Becky Lynch injuring Bianca Belair last week.

Here is Becky for a chat. She sits in a chair and asks what it profits a man to gain the world but to lose his soul. Becky went fifteen months without the Raw Women’s Title and it is worth it to give given up her soul to get the title back. This week she was going to go after Belair’s hair but Belair is injured too. It’s a throat for a throat and Becky would sell out over and over again if it meant keeping her title. At Wrestlemania, she’ll show Belair what profits she has gained. This felt like an explanation for a heel turn that took place seven months ago.

We recap Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory.

Theory is ready for the dumb jock McAfee and he wants to make Vince McMahon proud..

Veer Mahaan is coming on April 4.

Aust….WAIT WHAT??? THEY SET A DATE??? Somebody get my medicine.

Austin Theory vs. Finn Balor

Non-title and here is Pat McAfee to join commentary. An early rollup gives Balor two and he’s back with a basement dropkick. Theory gets kicked out to the floor, where McAfee mocks him with some weird dancing. The distraction lets Balor hit a shotgun dropkick against the barricade and we take a break.

Back with McAfee cheerleading Balor to his feet for the comeback, only to have Theory knock him outside. Balor sends him into the announcers’ table over and over, setting up the shotgun dropkick into the corner. The Coup de Grace misses though and Theory takes Balor down, drawing McAfee up to the apron. The ATL is broken up but Theory is right back with a brainbuster onto the knee for two. Another McAfee distraction cuts Theory off though and the small package gives Balor the pin at 7:58.

Rating: C. This was all about McAfee vs. Theory as the US Champion was left out there in a feud that has nothing to do with him. I’m still not sure why this is McAfee vs. Theory instead of Theory going after the Intercontinental Title, as Ricochet has nothing going on and it isn’t like McAfee is being brought in especially for this show. The match was good enough while it wasn’t focused on the announcer, but that was the case most of the time.

We look at the Raw Tag Team Title situation, which is leading to RKBro defending against Alpha Academy and the Street Profits in a triple threat at Wrestlemania.

RKBro vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title. Before the match Chad Gable promises that the Academy is winning the titles at Wrestlemania. Gable cranks on Orton’s arm to start but Orton brings him into the corner. The assisted Floating Bro gives Riddle two but Gable sends him into the wall that is Otis. Riddle fights back with some running forearms, only to be knocked outside for the running Otis clothesline as we take a break. Back with Riddle making the hot tag to Orton (big reaction for that) and house is cleaned. The hanging DDT hits Gable for two as Otis makes the save. Riddle comes back in and jumps Gable, setting up the Bro Derek for the pin at 7:49.

Rating: C+. RKBro continues to be the most popular act on Raw and they continue to put on some of the most consistent matches on the show as well. It makes sense to keep them together this long and I’m not sure where they go from here. For the first time in forever, I want to see a team stay together and it is going to be a big deal when they finally split up, because they have gelled that well.

Post match the Street Profits run in and take out both teams.

Dana Brooke was attacked by Akira Tozawa earlier this week but manages to escape with the title again, as Tozawa continues to screw things up.

Dana Brooke/Reggie vs. Akira Tozawa/Tamina

Non-title. Earlier today, Tamina choked Tozawa and demanded to get the 24/7 Title. We start with a game of chicken but Tozawa can’t hold Tamina up. Instead he gets on her shoulders and locks up with Dana until Tamina kicks Reggie in the ribs. Tamina and Tozawa are sent into the corner, where Tamina falls face first into a low blow on Tozawa. The running flipping seated senton gives Reggie the pin at 1:04. This is a thing that continues to be on Raw every week.

We recap the opening segment.

AJ Styles vs. Seth Rollins

The winner gets Edge at Wrestlemania. Styles grabs a headlock to start but gets knocked down by a running shoulder. A Pedigree attempt is countered though and AJ sends him over the top and out to the floor. The slingshot forearm takes Rollins down again and we take a break. Back with Styles fighting out of a cravate but missing a charge into the post. That’s good for a nine count on the floor so Rollins chops away in the corner back inside. A running dropkick in the Tree of Woe (that was nasty) gives Rollins two but AJ fights back again.

Rollins breaks up a springboard though and AJ goes crashing back to the floor. Rollins’ suicide dive connects and we take another break. Back again with Rollins letting go of a cravate and screaming about how he needs this to Styles. The slugout goes to Styles, including the running forearm in the corner. The fireman’s carry backbreaker gives AJ two and a belly to back faceplant gets the same.

Styles can’t hit the Styles Clash as Rollins escapes and grabs a Falcon Arrow for two of his own. We hit the pinfall reversal sequence until AJ suplexes him into the corner. AJ takes him up top but Rollins slips off and bangs up his leg, allowing Styles to grab a torture rack swing into a powerbomb for two more. The Phenomenal Forearm is superkicked out of the air though and Rollins hits the Buckle Bomb. AJ slips out to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Edge comes in with a chair to Styles for the DQ at 22:44.

Rating: B. Again, what would you expect from two guys of this caliber getting this much time in a featured match? That is the kind of thing that you do not see very often and it is special when it does, as both of them got to look good. I don’t think there was much doubt about the result, but the match being rather good makes up for that.

Post match Rollins snaps and says the show doesn’t happen next week unless he gets what he wants. Things are broken at ringside to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. What mattered here was it felt like the show was taking things seriously (24/7 Title stuff aside) and the talking segments worked better than in recent weeks. They helped advance some things towards Wrestlemania, with Owens’ segment working out well. I’m not sure how we get to what should be the pretty obvious end game for Rollins but they put it in the prime spot this week and it felt bigger as a result. I liked this show, though it felt like a fluke rather than a change of pace.

Results
Mysterios b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Frog splash to Roode
Omos b. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez – Double pin
Natalya/Shayna Baszler b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley – Hart Attack to Morgan
Finn Balor b. Austin Theory – Small package
RKBro b. Alpha Academy – Bro Derek to Gable
Dana Brooke/Reggie b. Tamina/Akira Tozawa – Running flipping seated senton to Tozawa
AJ Styles b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Edge interfered

 

 

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