WWF House Show – April 22, 1985: The Better Sequel

WWF House Show
Date: April 22, 1985
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund

This is one of those random house shows that was put up on the WWE Vault channel and there is a good chance that it was put up forty years to the day. We are just a few weeks after the first Wrestlemania and that means it is time for the fairly unexplored fallout period from the then biggest show of all time. Let’s get to it.

Junior Heavyweight Title: The Cobra vs. Barry O

Cobra is defending but doesn’t have the belt here, which has commentary confused. O (short for Orton, and he has a nephew named Randy) jumps him to start fast, with a slam and jumping elbow getting two. Cobra gets sent outside, followed by a neck crank back inside. A running in place powerslam gives O two and we pause for O to grab his own head. Cobra breaks out of a front facelock and slugs away, setting up a slam int a legdrop for two.

O kicks his way out of a sunset flip but gets caught in a headscissors, which has Monsoon annoyed at the referee for checking for a choke. That’s broken up and O hammers away, only to get backdropped into an armbar. As commentary talks about the various champions and contenders, O breaks out but gets caught with a top rope forearm to the head. A middle rope knee gives Cobra two but O gets in a shot of his own.

O’s rope walk splash misses and Cobra just starts slugging away with forearms, setting up a jumping spinwheel kick (that was a big spot in this era). A stomp to the stomach has O bailing to the floor for a needed breather before coming inside to beg for mercy. O grabs the leg for a spinning toehold but Cobra is right back up with another spinning kick. A dropkick puts O on the floor, setting up the slingshot dive. Cobra suplexes him back inside but misses a top rope backsplash. Back up and Cobra grabs a jumping hurricanrana for the pin to retain at 13:20.

Rating: B. Oh man this was starting to get really good in the end but they went home when they should have. The biggest issue here was the clash of styles, as Cobra was wrestling a more lucha style match while O was your traditional heel. Cobra was WAY different than almost anything you would see here and O kept up with him as well as he could. This was a lot of fun and WAY better than I would have expected.

Tatsumi Fujinami vs. Matt Borne

You know, because we needed another big international star. Fujinami isn’t interested in a handshake to start so they fight over a lockup and go to the ropes. Some forearms have Borne down as commentary talks about Fujinami’s footwork. A headlock takeover lets Fujinami crank on him a bit, with Borne getting up. Fujinami backflips out of a suplex and we’re right back to the headlock takeover.

Back up and some shots to the face have Fujinami in trouble for a change, allowing Borne to yell at the referee. The chinlock goes on, allowing Borne to yell at commentary for a change. The choking continues so commentary talks about Jack Nicholson (Okerlund: “One of the biggest athletic supporters in southern California.”). Fujinami fights up, only to get pulled back into a headscissors as I’m not sure if this is the best way to use his talents.

Borne cranks away for a bit before hammering away in the corner. A front facelock keeps the bored fans all the more bored, as does Borne cutting off the comeback attempt. Fujinami finally fights out of a chinlock and hits a dropkick for two. A clothesline puts Borne down again and a bridging German suplex finishes him off at 11:31.

Rating: D+. Gah what was that? This was the clash of styles I was expecting in the opener and it was rough to see as a result. Borne was wrestling a basic style and didn’t let Fujinami do much of anything. You’re only going to get so much out of any legend when you have Borne holding him in a front facelock for so long and it killed anything they could do here.

Jimmy Hart is ready for King Kong Bundy to wreck Swede Hanson. Bundy says Hanson is tough but he’ll look small when they’re in the ring. Then it’s time for Hulk Hogan.

Swede Hanson vs. King Kong Bundy

Hanson is a big guy from North Carolina. They fight over a lockup to start as we hear about Bundy’s nine second win at Wrestlemania, because timing isn’t wrestling’s strong suit. Hanson gets in a shot of his own to rock Bundy and the fans rather approve. Back up and Hanson is rocked with a running forearm but he comes back with a forearm to stagger Bundy again.

Bundy rakes the eyes though and slowly hammers away before sending Hanson face first into the buckle. The slow beating continues as commentary lists off the reasons this company is so awesome. Hanson starts Hulking Up (as Monsoon puts it) and some chops put Bundy in the corner. That’s cut off by a quick Avalanche into a big elbow to give Bundy the pin at 4:38.

Rating: C-. While still not a good match, this was Hanson making Bundy sweat a bit more before Bundy put him away. You could clearly see that Bundy was being built up for something bigger down the line and that would probably be someone in red and yellow. Having him beat various people over and over would build him up and that’s what we saw here.

British Bulldogs vs. Rene Goulet/Johnny Rodz

This is the Bulldogs’ MSG debut as the new generation is coming in. Rodz and Kid start things off but we pause for Goulet to do his thing with his glove. Actually Goulet starts and they lock up after nearly a minute of shenanigans. Kid’s headscissors doesn’t get him very far so he spins around into an armbar to take Goulet down instead. Smith comes in and actually gets shouldered down before Rodz throws her over the top.

Back up and Smith hits a quick dropkick before a knee to the ribs cuts him off again. Kid comes in with a missile dropkick for the save (that didn’t look great) into a nipup (that looked better), followed by a gutwrench suplex for two. Rodz breaks up the chinlock and Goulet comes back in for a knee drop. Kid avoids a diving headbutt though and it’s back to Smith, who is taken down as well.

Rodz elbows Smith down but misses a legdrop, meaning the vertical suplex can connect for two. It’s back to Goulet, who grabs a test of strength on the mat, only to get monkey flipped away. Smith muscles Rodz up for the running powerslam and then fireman’s carries Goulet. Kid climbs onto Goulet’s back and hits a top rope headbutt to pin Rodz at 8:12.

Rating: B-. Not a great match, but you could tell the Bulldogs needed some better opponents. They were a great example of a team with a nice balance of power and speed and it worked well. The finishing sequence alone felt like something different than anything else you would have seen around this time and if you get them the right competition, it would go great.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Moondog Spot

Steamboat starts fast with a hiptoss into a pose into a chop to the floor as the fans seem to like Steamboat so far. Spot stays on the floor long enough that Steamboat goes outside and counters a headlock into a posting. Back in and Spot takes over with a shot to the face and an atomic drop, setting up the chinlock. That’s broken up and Steamboat gets his usually great looking sunset flip which is blocked with a shot to the head.

It’s back to the chinlock as you can see why the Moondogs aren’t so well remembered in the ring. Back up and they collide for a double down, with Steamboat not being able to slam him either. Spot’s shoulder breaker gets two so he goes up, only to get slammed back down. Steamboat strikes away, setting up the high crossbody for the pin at 7:25.

Rating: C+. Steamboat knows how to make a comeback like no other and that was the case again here. Spot wasn’t exactly great in the ring but at least he was able to be a good opponent for Steamboat. Granted it helps when you’re in the ring with one of the best ever, as Steamboat was certainly able to make anyone look good.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Magnificent Muraco

Hogan is defending (shocking I know) and Muraco has Mr. Fuji with him. There are no entrances here, which means they didn’t want to edit out Eye Of The Tiger for Hogan. The place is just nuts for Hogan, even if he’s in the always weird looking white gear this time. A hiptoss and jumping knee send Muraco outside, followed by an armbar back inside.

That’s reversed into a slam but Hogan pulls him back down into a hammerlock (which didn’t seem to be the plan but they made a bit of a botch work fine). A legdrop onto the arm keeps Muraco in trouble and another armbar has what’s left of the arm in pain. Back up and Muraco seems to go low, setting up a pull of the leg to take Hogan down.

Muraco starts cranking on the leg but Hogan fights up and hits the corner clothesline. The big elbow misses though and Muraco drops some knees to keep Hogan down. The piledriver doesn’t work for Muraco and it’s time to Hulk Up, even though Hogan doesn’t quite have the sequence down yet. Muraco gets kicked out to the floor and Hogan follows, only for Fuji to offer a distraction. A ram into the apron/post keeps Hogan down for the countout at 13:36.

Rating: C+. This was a way to set up the rematch for the next month and that’s a fine way to go. Muraco is someone who was just big enough to feel like a threat without actually being one, though the fact that he wasn’t on Wrestlemania is a bit odd. Nice enough match to set up the ending though, with Muraco surviving most of the Hulk Up, which will make beating him all the better next time.

Post match Hogan grabs the belt and wants to keep fighting but cuts Muraco off from getting the title and chases him away.

Iron Sheik vs. Mike Rotundo

Freddie Blassie and Lou Albano are here too as Rotundo starts fast, taking Sheik down with a slam before he can even get his gear off. Sheik gets choked with his robe and sent outside for a needed breather. Rotundo grabs a headlock on the mat and cranks away a bit, followed by a sunset flip for two.

Back up and Sheik gets in a suplex before knocking Rotundo outside in a heap. A chinlock into a hammerlock doesn’t last long on Rotundo, who is back up with an atomic drop. Rotundo grinds away on a front facelock before sending Sheik outside for a change. Back in and Rotundo keeps it on the mat with a headlock, which makes sense for two people with deep amateur backgrounds.

Sheik comes back with some choking and sends him to the floor for a chair shot, which is fine with the referee for some reason. The abdominal stretch goes on, followed by the gutwrench suplex (which someone needs to bring back) but Rotundo manages his own suplex for two. Sheik misses a running knee in the corner and gets rolled up for the pin at 14:32.

Rating: B. This wound up being a heck of a match and probably the best Rotundo match I’ve ever seen. Sheik is best known as being almost a caricature for most of his career but he could have a good outing when he had the chance. This was a good example of two people having similar styles and meshing well together and that’s not a bad way to go.

Barry Windham vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Ah so it’s this kind of a show. Albano and Blassie are here again too. Windham works on the arm to start and cranks away at a wristlock. A rollup gets two on Volkoff and he claims a pull of the trunks. To be fair, there is quite a bit of trunk to pull. The arm cranking resumes with an armbar having Volkoff down but he comes back with a shot to the face. Some stomping has Windham in trouble and one heck of a gorilla press sends him flying.

The bearhug stays on the back, with Volkoff lifting him up and smiling about it like an evil powerhouse should. Windham fights out and grabs a sleeper, followed by a dropkick and atomic drop. A headbutt gives us a double down before Volkoff misses a charge into the post. Windham hammers away in the corner but the Iron Sheik comes in for the DQ at 12:29.

Rating: B-. This was another match that took me by surprise as the idea of Volkoff wrestling a good one is quite the odd thing to see. What matters the most here is that both guys were working hard and it was a solid showdown that made me want to see these teams fight again. Which they would, with Windham and Rotundo winning the titles back in about two months.

Post match the beatdown is on until Rotundo makes the save. Not bad for about thirty minutes between two singles matches to set up a tag rematch here. Though a six man tag with the managers would have been fun too.

The Fink hypes up the next MSG show on May 20. We run down the card, with Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff defending against the US Express (Windham/Rotundo) and Muraco vs. Hogan II. There is a bonus match too though, as Brutus Beefcake and Johnny V will team up against David Sammartino (the fans know what’s coming and are more than up for it) and….BRUNO SAMMARTINO (and there’s the monster pop).

Tito Santana and Junkyard Dog are ready for Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake.

Tito Santana/Junkyard Dog vs. Brutus Beefcake/Greg Valentine

Johnny V and Jimmy Hart are both here with the villains. It’s a brawl to start with Beefcake and Valentine being knocked to the floor in a hurry. We settle down to Dog and Beefcake running the ropes to start with Dog knocking him down without much trouble. Valentine’s cheap shot from the apron doesn’t work as Beefcake runs into him, allowing Santana to come in.

Santana whips them into each other again and grabs a chinlock on Beefcake. That’s broken up and it’s off to Valentine for a gutbuster to drop Santana. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Beefcake sends Santana outside. Back in and Valentine slowly hammers (there we go) away before Beefcake uses the trunks to cut off a tag attempt. Santana fights up and hammers away, which brings in the other two.

Okerlund is begging for a double DQ but we settle back down. That doesn’t last long as Santana crawls around and gets over to Dog for the house cleaning. A falling headbutt gets two on Valentine but a second one misses as we settle down a bit. Beefcake and Valentine work on Dog’s leg but he gets over to Santana to slug away on Valentine, which just feels right. Santana’s big clothesline gets two on Valentine as everything breaks down again. The flying forearm is enough for Santana to pin Valentine at 13:14.

Rating: B-. There are certain pairs who are going to work well together no matter what they do and that is the case with Valentine and Santana. Those two could have turned a boat race into an exciting match and they made this into an entertaining tag match. If nothing else, it’s interesting to see what very well may have been the future Dream Team’s first match, only a few months before they would win the Tag Team Titles. Solid main event here, as Santana goes from starting Wrestlemania to closing the follow up show.

Post match the villains beat the winners down.

After a break, the arena clears out and the ring is swept of trash as commentary wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B. This was a heck of a show with some rather good matches (the opener, the Tag Team Title singles matches and more) and stuff to make you want to come back later. It’s interesting to see this period as well, as you pretty much don’t have much outside of Saturday Night’s Main Event to tide you over between the first two Wrestlemanias. The crowd was certainly still hot and it made for a good show here. You could definitely get the Wrestlemania fallout vibes here and that is a good sign for the coming months. I had a lot of fun with this and could definitely go with more from this era, which is critically overlooked.

Results
Cobra b. Barry O – Hurricanrana
Tatsumi Fujinami b. Matt Borne – German suplex
King Kong Bundy b. Swede Hanson – Elbow drop
British Bulldogs b. Rene Goulet/Johnny Rodz – Swan dive to Rodz
Ricky Steamboat b. Moondog Spot – High crossbody
Magnificent Muraco b. Hulk Hogan via countout
Mike Rotundo b. Iron Sheik – Rollup
Barry Windham b. Nikolai Volkoff via DQ when Iron Sheik interfered
Tito Santana/Junkyard Dog b. Brutus Beefcake/Greg Valentine – Flying forearm to Valentine

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge – September 20, 1986: The Distant Future

Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 20, 1986
Location: Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Ernie Ladd, Johnny V

I’m not sure what to expect from this show and that is what makes the show so much fun. Instead of one big story, it’s more like they’re picking random wrestlers who have a little something going on at the moment and throw them into some squash matches. That’s how things worked in the Golden Era so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick host intro.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Hart Foundation vs. Islanders

This is when the Islanders were still good guys and Jimmy hart is in the Harts’ corner. Of note: the graphics say this include “Hako” and “Brett” Hart. The Harts jump them to start and clear the ring until it’s Neidhart kneeing Tama in the ribs. There’s a bite to the face as Johnny V makes south Pacific jokes.

Something like a Demolition Decapitator drops Tama again as we get an insert promo from Jimmy Hart about how much better his team is than the Islanders. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Haku so everything breaks down, with the barricade being knocked down at ringside. Toma busts out a crazy dive over the top (In 1986!) and the referee throws it out at 2:39, which is a bit of a surprise.

Post match the Islanders clean house without much trouble.

This week’s Wrestler’s Rebuttal is from Adrian Adonis, who is ready for his debate with Roddy Piper in the coming weeks. The topic: who has the better talk show segment. So they’re talking about talking? This isn’t so much a rebuttal as much as a clip from Superstars.

Randy Savage vs. Tony Garea

Non-title and AGAIN Danny Davis messes up by distracting Garea. Not that it matters as Garea is right back with a crossbody for two and a sunset flip for the same. Back up and Savage knees him out to the floor, setting up the top rope ax handle. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham in the desert, where he says he’s coming back to hurt someone. Like Savage for example. Savage takes him back inside, hits the slam and drops the elbow for the pin at 2:26. Garea got in a bit there but then it was the Savage Show, meaning it was awesome.

Jake Roberts thinks Ricky Steamboat is stupid for coming after him after getting burned once before. And no, he didn’t get the Snake Pit by brown nosing, but because he has talent.

Machines vs. Tiger Chung Lee/Al Navarro/JJ Jackson

Oddly enough, Hayes doesn’t know Jackson’s name and has to ask him. Lou Albano is here with the Machines: Big Machine (Blackjack Mulligan), Super Machine (Ax from Demolition) and Giant Machine (I’ll let you figure it out). Lee and Big start things off as we get an insert promo from Bobby Heenan talking about how much smarter he is than Albano, who must have a machine for these machines. Jackson comes in and gets clotheslined by Super, who sends him into a right hand from Giant for the pin at 1:30. This team is hilarious in a way that would only work in wrestling.

Koko B. Ware, with music box blaring, gets Ken Resnick to dance with him. He is no stepping stone.

BUY WWF MAGAZINE!

BUY LJN ACTION FIGURES! No really, as those things are valuable today.

BUY WWF THUMB WRESTLERS! I think I had most of those.

Dream Team vs. Lanny Poffo/Dick Slater

That’s a heck of a random jobber team and oddly enough they get a full entrance while Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine are already in the ring. Poffo’s poem is about how Slater is a rebel from Dixie who will do his thing. Valentine slams Poffo to start as we get an insert promo from Mr. Fuji, who does NOT like Dixie. Slater comes in and elbows Valentine in the head for two.

That’s enough for Johnny V, the Dream Team’s manager, to bail on commentary and go take care of his team. A suplex gets two on Slater and a sunset flip gives him two on Valentine. Everything breaks down and Valentine snaps Poffo’s throat across the top rope so Beefcake can get the pin at 2:35. The V stuff made it a bit more interesting.

And now, the Snake Pit with Bobby Heenan and Paul Orndorff. Jake talks about fakers and Orndorff says Hulk Hogan wants to be him. The robe comes off so Orndorff can pose, with Heenan saying Orndorff’s thirst will only be quenched when he wins the WWF Title.

Sika vs. Rick Hunter

The Wizard is here with Sika. Hunter slugs away to start and gets choked down with no effect. Sika slaps him down and we get an insert interview from Honky Tonk Man, who is still on his way. Hunter tries to forearm his way out of trouble and gets choked into the corner. More choking ensues as the Wizard shouts at Sika, who finishes with the Samoan drop (with Sika more laying him down than dropping) for the pin at 3: 23.

Rating: D. When the Samoan drop isn’t looking great, there is only so much that you’re going to get out of a match. Sika was never much on his own but was quite great when he was part of the Wild Samoans. That being said, this was another weak match which got some time, partially due to Honky Tonk Man sucking any life out of the thing with his out of date good guy act.

Video on the Rougeau Brothers riding motorcycles and in a boat. Riveting.

Killer Bees vs. Terry Gibbs/Jack Foley

Ladd thinks the Bees have ants in their pants and Monsoon thinks the Dream Team is scared to put their “John Henry” on a contract with the Killer Bees. Brunzell and Gibbs trade wristlocks to start before it’s off to Blair. Gibbs misses a running elbow so Jack comes in, only to get fireman’s carried.

This lets Johnny get in another “Iwo Jima, out of ammo” line, which must have some other meaning. An atomic drop and jumping knee drop Jack and a double elbow does the same. The arm work continues as Ladd refers to the Dream Team as the “Dream Machine”. Johnny keeps talking about how ugly Foley is and a flying hip attack gives Blair the pin at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Another slow and nothing match, with commentary sounding WAY off being the main focus. There were all kinds of tag teams around this time and the Bees, while good, weren’t exactly going to stand out when the British Bulldogs and the Harts etc. were around. They were a big enough deal here and felt like something of stars. That being said, the Jack guy would get a bit better when he started going by something closer to his real name: Mick. Yeah I know it’s not much of a secret, but I need something to get me through these matches.

Bobby Heenan says Mr. Wonderfulmania is running wild and Paul Orndorff comes in to talk about how jealous Hogan is. Hogan can’t lift like him so he stole Real American and the t-shirt ripping. Heenan chants WONDERFUL to wrap things up.

Here’s who’s coming next week.

Cue that musical review!

Overall Rating: D+. Randy Savage can only give you so much on a show with almost nothing else. The Harts vs. the Islanders felt like it could have had potential but then nothing came of it due to time. The Machines are always good for a chuckle, but I need a little more than the rapid fire short matches with almost nothing worth seeing. Still though, this is about as straight up my alley as I can get so we’ll definitely be back.

 

 

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Tuesday Night Titans – November 13, 1984: If You Put This Show Into a Bird’s Brain, It Would Turn Into a Human and Change the Channel

Tuesday Night Titans
Date: November 13, 1984
Location: Video One Studios, Owings Mills, Maryland
Hosts: Vince McMahon, Lord Alfred Hayes

Another request here, partially so I can say I’ve done an episode of this show. This is a bit of a different show as it’s mainly a talk show with wrestling guests. There would be matches included, though this isn’t exactly the best time period from a quality standpoint. I’m not entirely sure what to expect here but that’s the kind of show Tuesday Night Titans was. Let’s get to it.

I’m going to do my best on the dates/locations of the matches but it’s one of those shows that throws them them together from other TV tapings.

I can barely hear Hayes’ introduction over the REALLY loud intro music.

Vince and Hayes are on the talk show set to intro the show. We talk about Thanksgiving (this is being written two days before his year’s holiday so it’s kind of appropriate) with Vince promising to deliver a turkey in the form of first guest in Captain Lou Albano. Lou immediately lists off all of his accomplishments as a manager, which has to be some kind of a record (fourteen Tag Team Champions is pretty crazy).

He goes on a rant about how amazing athletes wrestlers are, even talking about Vince’s amateur wrestling credentials. Albano brags about his IQ of 901.73 back in his medulla ob-long-gata which makes him a linguist and a bi-linguist. Vince FINALLY cuts off this rather hilarious speech and throws us to a match.

From Hamilton, Ontario, Canada – October 29/30, 1984

Nick DeCarlo vs. The Spoiler

Spoiler, a big masked guy (I won’t say who he is in case you haven’t seen him before) has Albano in his corner. Before we get going, here’s Intercontinental Champion Greg Valentine (also Albano’s client) to say he doesn’t have any competition. Albano goes into a rant about how awesome Valentine is as the match starts. Valentine goes over to commentary to talk about how he wants respect as Spoiler throws DeCarlo into the corner. DeCarlo gets knocked outside, followed by a top rope clothesline back inside. A knee lift sets up the Claw to put DeCarlo away in a hurry.

Back in the studio, Albano apologizes to Hayes for not being a gentleman. Then he goes into a rant about Spoiler squeezing a ball in his hand until he got strong enough to break a pair of pliers. Now he can squash any wrestler’s skull. Vince: “Some skulls are softer than others.” As for Valentine, they might just retire the title. For now though, he’ll face any contender around.

Back from a break with Albano laid out on the couch with his shirt open as we get to our second guest: Barry Windham. Barry is a standard face but Albano laughs at him and talks about his own training style. Albano’s various stomach issues take us to the next match.

From Salisbury, Maryland – November 7, 1984.

Barry Windham vs. Charlie Fulton

An unnamed hillbilly is in the crowd. We’ll call him Jim and move on. Barry takes him down with a top wristlock before grabbing an armdrag into an armbar. That’s enough wrestling as Barry forearms him down and drops a knee for two. More right hands drop Fulton and a bulldog is good for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as Windham never felt right in the WWF. It was clear that he wasn’t exactly happy there as he would eventually self destruct, though at least he did have a nice run in the US Express. Fulton was a jobber to the stars around this point and that’s exactly what he was doing here.

Back in the studio, Albano makes more fun of Windham and eventually gives him some dieting advice. Oh and watch any match you’re not involved in. Windham calls him a slob so Albano calls him dehydrated and says if you put Windham’s brain in a parakeet, it would fly backwards.

We take a break and come back with Mike Rotundo as the third guest. Albano: “Take your hat off! You’re not in the barn!” Vince talks about Rotundo’s athletic accomplishments and again, Albano talks over him in a rather heelish way.

From the Hamilton, Ontario, Canada – October 29, 1984.

Barry Windham/Mike Rotundo vs. Mohammad Saad/Bobby Bass

Not quite the US Express just yet. Windham knocks Saad out to the floor to start as we hear about Windham and Rotundo’s background. Rotundo comes in for an armbar and Bass gets forearmed into the corner for his cheating efforts. The good guys start their fast tagging and work over Saad’s arm until a bulldog is good for the pin. Total squash.

Back in the studio, Rotundo threatens to shut Albano up. Windham and Rotundo talk about the various regional Tag Team Titles they’ve won, which you don’t hear about very often. Albano has been advising the current World Tag Team Champions (Dick Murdoch/Adrian Adonis) but Rotundo doesn’t think they need a manager at this point. Albano rants us to a break.

I’m not sure where the next match takes place. Vince says it’s from the Meadowlands in East Rutherford, New Jersey but I can’t find any record of these two ever having a match there. I can however find one from around this time in Toronto, which would make a lot more sense.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Rocky Johnson

Joined in progress with the announcers saying it’s in the Toronto area, meaning we’re in the Maple Leaf Gardens on October 21, 1984. Thanks for that, commentators. Johnson punches him in the jaw but doesn’t follow up. Well he’s never been the brightest guy in the world. A nerve hold (I think) takes Johnson down but some gyrating gets him back to his feet. Back up and a double shoulder puts them both down for a breather. Volkoff wins a test of strength and of course cheats as soon as Johnson starts coming back. A kick to the ribs sends Volkoff outside but he’s right back in with a hard forearm to the back. Johnson hits some of his always weird looking (though still fine) dropkicks, only to get dropped throat first across the top rope for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Not a terrible power vs. speed match here with Johnson being more about charisma than his in-ring abilities. This was also back when Volkoff was looking like a powerhouse rather than the much bigger version that most people remember him as. It was easy to see why they ran Volkoff vs. Hogan so many times as this was during a big time in the Cold War and it was kind of a perfect matchup.

And now, COMEDY! Hayes brings out the world’s oldest wrestling fan, a man who appears to be about 94 years old (or about 40 and in bad makeup and a horrible wig) named Lloyd Lynch. He talks about his hometown of Cut and Shoot, Texas before nodding off for a second. His favorite wrestler was the Swedish Angel, a 300lb guy with a big bearhug that everyone loved. Vince has such an awkward look on his face and Lloyd makes it worse by talking about seeing the Angel in Madison Square Garden and squeezing a man’s hair off. That man turned into Gorgeous George and that’s how he got his start.

After talking a bit about meeting Vince’s grandfather and an award Vince’s father just received, it’s time to talk about women’s wrestling and Lloyd is already laughing. Apparently Lloyd remembers a women’s wrestling match from 1834 with Millie Lang Tree. He also knew some woman from Boston who defeated a 412lb wolf with a Boston crab in the back of a pickup truck at a drive-in movie in San Antonio.

As for Millie though, she used a double toe half nelson, which of course Lynch agrees to demonstrate. He pulls his leg up into the air….and hurts himself in the process. Thankfully that’s it and hopefully we never have to sit through something like this again. It was about as funny as being hit in the head with a box of hammers as they weren’t trying for anything more than redneck hillbilly humor with Lynch apparently being at least 110 years old. Just bad stuff here and something beneath even the WWF’s standards.

Thankfully we move on to the next guest: David Bruno Sammartino, who would later drop the Bruno and then realize that no one cared about Bruno’s really boring son. We hear about Bruno trying to keep David out of wrestling but David knew it was all he wanted to do. The Sammartino name isn’t a burden because it’s like being Rocky Marciano’s son. And now, a match.

From (I believe) the East Rutherford, New Jersey – October 14, 1984.

David Sammartino vs. Mr. Fuji

Joined in progress with David working on an armbar in front of a silent crowd. Gorilla calls a shoulder block beautiful and it’s right back to the armbar. Fuji comes back with a falling headbutt to the ribs and the slow motion continues with the fans still not caring. A stomach claw continues to be one of the dumbest moves of all time until Sammartino grabs the leg to escape. Fuji’s slow motion offense continues but David slugs away like his dad to the only reaction of the match. A kick to the ribs and a knee drop give David two and a small package puts Fuji away.

Rating: D-. The match was bad but I always feel bad for Sammartino. He always looked like he was trying but there’s just nothing there. Other than being Bruno’s son, there’s nothing about him that stands out. It’s not really surprising that he never went anywhere in wrestling and a lot of it probably comes from the pressure of being Bruno’s son. Really boring match here, which was common for David.

Back in the studio and thankfully Albano is back to talk about David’s physique. He likes what he sees in Sammartino and suggests that he eat lots of protein, including unborn virgin goat’s milk. Oh and change your name. Not bad advice actually.

We come back with our next guest: the huge Blackjack Mulligan, who brought the house band with him. He’s here to stand up for AMERICA and doesn’t want to hear about people like the Iron Sheik who doesn’t stand for AMERICA. Then you have people like Big John Studd, who just isn’t nice in general. After listing off a few more villains, it’s off to a match.

From Hamilton, Ontario, Canada – October 29, 1984.

Blackjack Mulligan vs. Ted Grizzly

Grizzly is billed from Morgan’s Corner, Arkansas, which was the hometown of Haystacks Calhoun. Mulligan shoves him down with almost no effort and forearms him in the chest. A drop toehold has Grizzly tapping but that wouldn’t mean anything for a good ten years. Grizzly’s right hands have no effect and a jumping back elbow to the jaw puts Grizzly away with almost no effort. The fans stand up and look at something in the aisle but we don’t get to see what it is. That might be a bit too interesting you see.

Back in the studio, Mulligan says he’s ready to face anyone, anytime. For tonight though, let’s bring out some square dancers! Seriously they come out and dance and time is devoured. Vince FINALLY throws it to commercial….but first we see a mechanical bull. Oh jeez here we go.

Back with Vince, Hayes and Mulligan standing next to the mechanical bull called Mr. Black. Mulligan doesn’t think much of Roddy Piper, who can’t shut up long enough to have a real talk. Blackjack doesn’t quite get how this wrestling thing works does he? Anyway he’ll be having his own talk show called Blackjack’s Barbecue where we can ask the real questions.

We go to Piper’s Pit where Piper mocks a rather muscular wrestler until Mulligan shows up and gets in Piper’s face. Mulligan calls him a pole cat (skunk for you city folk) and says he’s proud of his heritage….and that’s it.

Back in the studio, Mulligan talks about the use for mechanical bulls, which Hayes says he’s heard of being inside medieval dungeons. Vince is talked into getting on the thing and lasts a few seconds before falling off. And now, more from the band as this segment just keeps going for no logical reason. Hayes is put on the thing….and doesn’t ride because we go to a break.

After another break, Albano is going to answer some letters to give fans advice. First up, a woman whose husband won’t use modern hygiene products. Albano lists off a few ingredients to mix together, including olive oil and witch hazel, to put on him instead. It turns out that Albano doesn’t use such products either and Vince is disturbed.

The second question is from a woman with an obese husband who has heard of a book called the Fat Person’s Guide to Ecstasy. Albano has never heard of such a book and says the husband should lose weight. Then he lists off the book’s authors and thinks the husband should be on a low carbohydrate diet. There are fat people who are ok though, including the fat mamas who love him. You can eat anything you want, but only swallow half.

Third up is a wife with a husband who never takes off his cowboy boots. Albano thinks the husband has a bad smell and needs to lose weight. Maybe he should fill a bathtub with alcohol and walk into the thing. Albano is worried about what will happen when the guy dies and they have to take the boots off. That’s enough for Vince and we’re finally done. Another unfunny segment, though Albano’s insane charisma carried it as far as it could.

Back from a break with Vince and Hayes talking about the awesomeness that is Paul Orndorff. We get a highlight package on Orndorff’s career (despite him not being in the WWF for very long at this point), meaning some long clips of matches showcasing Orndorff’s strength. I was never a big Orndorff fan but he did have a great piledriver.

After a final break (thank goodness), it’s time for more Mulligan for more music and dancing, this time with Vince, Mulligan, and the rest of the guests joining in. Rotundo looks so out of place out there and it’s kind of funny.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh just no. I get the idea they were going for here but sweet goodness it wasn’t entertaining. The wrestling was a bunch of lame squashes and the “comedy” was somewhere between torture and just not funny. It’s a weird time for the company and while there was talent around, most of it wasn’t on display here. Albano was funny due to sheer willpower but you can only do the same jokes so many times.  This was horribly unentertaining and I’m kind of shocked this show got to 100 episodes.

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Monday Night Raw – May 3, 1993: What Passed for a Big Match

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 3, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

It’s another fresh month here as I’m hoping to start doing more of these. This is very early in the show’s run as we’re not even going to hit episode twenty by the end of the month. It’s also coming up on the first King of the Ring but there’s a good chance a lot of the tournament will take place on Superstars, which was still the major show for the most part. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Jim Duggan

Duggan is challenging and is in his weird singlet phase here. Shawn bails to the floor to start as the stalling is very obvious here. Back in and we hit some clotheslines before Shawn goes over to mess with Duggan’s board. Duggan won’t let him walk out and we take a break.

Back with Duggan getting his throat snapped across the top rope, followed by a few kneedrops. Some elbows get two and it’s off to the chinlock. Shawn cuts off a comeback with a knee to the ribs as this is in need of some caffeine. What it doesn’t need is a snapmare into another chinlock. Duggan fights up again and hits a few big right hands. A very spinning slam sends Shawn out to the floor and they walk around a lot for the double countout.

Rating: D. Far too much chinlockery here which is so often the case around here. Yeah it was an eleven minute match but that doesn’t mean it’s the right idea. It made for a very long and dull match as Duggan wasn’t about to win the title and his offense was almost all brawling. Shawn is a borderline miracle worker but he needs a little more than this.

Duggan doesn’t think this is fair and wants a rematch so he sits in the ring.

King of the Ring Report with a look at the updated qualifying matches. Not much to see here but I miss these things.

Doink the Clown vs. Kamikaze Kid

Now this is an interesting one as the Kid is making his debut after being one of the hottest indy acts in the country. However he’s been tweaked a bit as he was better known as the Lightning Kid (with his tights saying L. Kid) but now he’s under a new name. You would know him better as the 1-2-3 Kid or X-Pac. Doink runs him over to start and grabs an STF. A few elbow drops set up the Stump Puller (Doink sits on his neck and pulls back on the leg) for the submission.

Apparently Duggan is on the phone with President Jack Tunney. I’m as riveted as you are.

Bob Backlund vs. Dwayne Gill

They slowly circle to start with Backlund tripping him down a few times. That goes nowhere so let’s talk about Duggan getting his rematch against Michaels next week in a lumberjack match. Gill hiptosses him down and grabs the shortarm scissors so Backlund can do the power up spot. A bridging cradle (with two thumbs up) gives Bob the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much you can say here but it could have been worse. I know Backlund has won a lot of matches in his day but he just beat GILLBERG. This was fine enough as a way to kill some time but I don’t think anyone was buying Backlund as anything interesting at this point.

Duggan says he’ll beat Shawn in a fight instead of a match. This leads to an explanation of a lumberjack match for the really slow fans.

The Smoking Gunns are coming and like to shoot things in the desert. These vignettes need to come back, albeit in a slightly less cheesy form.

Headshrinkers vs. Jim Bell/Jay Savage

Lou Albano comes out for commentary as a surprise and goes on a rant about how he doesn’t trust Heenan. Bobby: “I’m not a demented halfwit where you put his brain in a pigeon and he flies upside down!” Sledge gets tossed into the air for a big crash and now we talk about the lumberjacks to ignore the match even more.

A spike piledriver only draws an OH NO and it’s back to Albano bantering. Normally I would make fun of this but what else is there to talk about during a squash? Albano speaks…..whatever language the Headshrinkers speak and tries to get them to follow the rules. The destruction continues and it’s a double Stroke into Fatu’s Superfly Splash for the pin.

Rating: D. This was all about the angle with Albano wanting to turn the Headshrinkers towards the light and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’d much rather they take a squash and turn it into a story instead of just wasting our time like most matches such as this one. Then again it might just be because I’m a Headshrinker fan.

Home improvement with the Bushwhackers from Smack Em Whack Em, which is pretty easily the best Coliseum Video ever.

Kamala vs. Rich Myers

Kamala’s manager Slick isn’t here this week for no apparent reason. The tossing around begins and we hit some choking. A superkick sets up the big splash and the fans remind Kamala to turn the jobber over for the pin.

Shawn is annoyed to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The chinlocking in the Intercontinental Title match really hurt things here but it could have been a lot worse. 1993 just isn’t that interesting and there’s really not much of a way around that. There isn’t much to say here as there’s over a month before the next pay per view and that doesn’t leave a lot to talk about week to week.

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Wrestler of the Day – January 20: Pat Patterson

Next up we have Pat Patterson, who has a nice variety of stuff.

I was hoping to talk about his match from Rio to win the Intercontinental Title but my copy of the tape doesn’t work. Instead here’s a match from Australia in 1968 against Antonio Pugliesi, who was often billed as Bruno Sammartino’s cousin.

Antonio Pugliesi vs. Pat Patterson

It’s a crisscross to start until Patterson is armdragged down a few times. Pat is the heel here I believe and stalls on the floor to prove me right. Back in and Patterson grabs a headlock but is shoved to the apron for more stalling. Patterson heads back inside and immediately runs from a charging Pugliese. They slug it out in the ring with Antonio slamming Patterson down and putting on a chinlock. Back up and Antonio hooks something that might be a relative of a hurricanrana and since this is 1968 in Australia, the fans are in awe.

We go back to normal for this era with an armbar on Patterson who pulls at the hair in a failed escaped attempt. The hold lasts nearly two minutes before Patterson fights up, only to be armdragged back into the armbar. Back up again and they trade dropkicks, only to have Patterson get caught in armbar #3. Pat fights to his feet and sends Antonio into the ropes they ram heads to put both guys down. Patterson misses a splash but avoids an elbow drop to keep both guys down again.

Antonio is sent to the floor and punches in the head a few times before dragging him back in for some ramming into the buckle. They slug it out from their knees until Antonio slugs Patterson out to the floor. He kicks Pat in the head and Patterson uses the breather to pull out a foreign object. A shot to the head has Antonio in trouble but the time runs out before we get a pin.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but the armbars make it clear that they were killing time until we got to the draw. Patterson was such a natural heel that he could have the fans ready to kill him like it was nothing. This match would be filed under “it was a very different era”, even though the stuff was similar to what you would see today.

It was off to the WWF for Patterson where he would get a world title shot on September 24, 1979 in a cage against Bob Backlund.

WWFTitle: BobBacklundvs. PatPatterson

This is from September of 79 apparently. Patterson is the IC Champion here and is a cage match expert but Backlund has never been in one. Patterson was more or less the top heel in the company by default here. They start off fast as Backlund is all fired up here. Patterson tries to get out early and that goes nowhere.

Both guys get incredibly close but can’t get all the way out. Patterson almost gets out with Backlund literally dragging him back over the top by a single leg. They keep fighting to try to get out as this is definitely more about winning than violence which is fine. We clip the match to them being on the mat and Patterson hammers away on a cut on Backlund’s head. From what I can find only about three minutes out of 16 total were clipped so we get the vast majority here.

Patterson is busted too. Vince calls the WWF Champion a gallant lad. That’s sweet. Patterson goes into the cage and Backlund goes for the kill. He winds up going into the cage though so forget about that I guess. Backlund gets the atomic drop which was one of his signature moves at the time. I guess Lombardi will have to be gentle tonight.

Patterson finds some brass knuckles and they go up. Pat can’t get a shot with them and both guys go down. And then Backlund kicks Patterson in the head and the force of the kick launches Backlund backwards through the cage door and out to the floor. Patterson FREAKS in the ring after that even though he did nothing but lose cleanly. I guess that’s why he’s a heel.

Rating: B. Very solid match here with both guys beating the tar out of each other. Backlund was at this best at the end of a feud where he had to go off to beat someone and that’s what he did here. This was either their fourth or fifth match against each other and Patterson had beaten him before. This was fun stuff though and it worked very well.

Patterson is of course most famous for being the first Intercontinental Champion so here’s a title defense from January 21, 1980.

Intercontinental Title: Pat Patterson vs. Lou Albano

Patterson goes right after him to start and Lou bails. He stays gone far longer than a ten count but is allowed back in anyway. Albano kicks Patterson in the knees and tries a foreign object which is taken away. Patterson scoops the leg and starts choking away. He chokes with some tape and Albano hits the floor. Back in Lou gets in a shot with the object but Patterson pounds him down again. Albano walks out and takes the countout.

Rating: D. This was just for fun as Patterson was still very popular and Albano was only an occasional wrestler. There wasn’t much to it and that’s just fine as it got the fans fired up despite there being like 15 minutes left in the show counting another break. Patterson is a guy who isn’t remembered as well as he should be.

This brings us to Patterson’s most famous match in the WWF: the Alley Fight against Sgt. Slaughter on May 4, 1981 in Madison Square Garden. These two had feuded for months and months and it’s time to blow it off in Meltzer’s match of the year for 1981.

Pat Patterson vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Patterson is in street clothes and the brawl is on as soon as Slaughter gets inside. A series of kicks puts Sarge down and Patterson chokes him in the corner. Slaughter misses a big right hand and hits the post, sending him to the apron. Back in and it’s time for a whipping from Patterson with Slaughter selling it like he’s been shot. Slaughter finally sends him through the ropes and onto the apron to get a breather but Pat is right back with belt shots to the back.

Sarge finally gets in a blow to the ribs and takes the belt before sending Patterson throat first into the top rope. He wraps the belt across Pat’s mouth and rips Patterson’s shirt off for good measure. More choking ensues but Pat charges at the ropes to send Slaughter out to the floor. Slaughter tries to come back in off the top but only hits the mat to put both guys down.

Patterson slams him down and drops a middle rope knee before hitting the same sequence again. He bites Slaughter’s forehead but Sarge kicks him in the gut and drops a few knees of his own to take over again. A kick to the head with the combat boot puts Patterson down again and Slaughter launches him to the floor. Back in and Pat punches at the ribs before catapulting Slaughter into the post, causing his forehead to burst open. It looks like he was stabbed to draw that much blood.

Pat goes after the cut but a low blow puts him back down. Slaughter pulls out brass knuckles but can’t see Pat after knocking him out. His face looks like Ultimate Warrior’s paint job. Patterson is back up and wins a slugout before hitting him in the head with a cowboy boot. Slaughter still has the knuckles on his hand. Another boot shot has Slaughter reeling and a third puts him down. Sarge is knocked into the post and onto the floor where he takes out a cameraman. The crowd is LOVING this. Pat just unloads with the boot until the Grand Wizard (Slaughter’s manager) throws in a towel to stop it. Sarge wanted to keep fighting.

Rating: A. Great great fight here with Slaughter’s blade job being one for the books. This was as brutal as you’re going to get for this era and the fans ate it up. One of the key things here is that Slaughter got to save face at the end with the Wizard throwing in the towel to stop it. Patterson rose up to fight the evil guy, which is what a hero is supposed to do. Great stuff here.

After that war, we’re going to do some goofy stuff for the rest of the day. First up is from the May 10, 1999 episode of Monday Night Raw when Patterson teamed up with Gerald Brisco to face the Mean Street Posse in a loser leaves the WWF match. This is old school vs. new school and respect vs. young punks and couldn’t be more fun.

The Stooges vs. Mean Street Posse

It’s Rodney and Pete Gas here. The Stooges come out to Real American and rip off their black shirts to reveal a Brisco Brothers Body Shop shirt and an IC Champ in Rio de Janeiro shirt. Both guys are in riot gear helmets as the fans aren’t sure what to make of this. Patterson is taken down on the floor but Brisco comes back with amateur stuff on the punks.

Lawler and Ross keep saying BROTHER to keep up the joke. A double clothesline puts Brisco down but Patterson saves him from a belt whipping. Brisco comes back with a suplex on Pete as Patterson crotches Rodney. Gerald hooks a Figure Four and Patterson puts on a Boston crab to wake the crowd up for the double submission to get rid of the Posse.

Rating: A+. Seriously, this is just fun.

Pat takes off his shirt to do the Hogan poses. JR gets the infamous line of “AND HE’S SINGLE FELLAS!”

We’ll close it out with a very disturbing match: Pat Patterson defending his Hardcore Title against Gerald Brisco in an evening gown match. Just go with it.

Hardcore Title: Pat Patterson vs. Gerald Brisco

This is the result of a weeks long story of Brisco pinning a sleeping Crash Holly for the title, only to have Patterson pour champagne in his eyes and blast him in the head with a bottle to steal the title. Pat wanted to keep the title so he dressed in drag to hide in the women’s locker room. Brisco found out and did the same to chase Patterson because…..well because he’s a Stooge.

Brisco comes out with a 2×4 while Patterson has a stuffed dress, a big blonde wig and a shopping cart full of pillows and teddy bears. Pat grabs the mic and says they’re friends and should Gerald should just take the title to save their friendship. Gerald goes for it but gets hit low and spanked, revealing pantyhose. Patterson shoves a banana in his face and stomps the wig off Gerald’s head.

A Stinkface is blocked with a low blow as the fans are booing this out of the building. Brisco sends him into the corner for a bronco buster and chokes him with a blonde wig. We see bras from both guys until Crash comes in and beats up both guys, including a trashcan shot to Patterson for the pin and the title. This was named worst match of the year and I can’t say I disagree. They fight up the aisle and indeed, Brisco is wearing a thong.

Rating: Y. As in yeah…..moving on.

Pat Patterson is a guy who didn’t have the best skill set but he knew how to work a crowd like few others. That’s in the same vein as Jerry Lawler and you can see how long of a career those two have had. A lot of Patterson’s best work was in the territories so unfortunately we can’t see most of it. What we got though was good and it’s clear that he had a lot of talent. Check out some of his stuff online if you can as he’s worth a look for an education in making the most of what you have.

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