ECW on TNN – September 29, 2000: Last Week Tonight

ECW on TNN
Date: September 29, 2000
Location: The Icenter, Salem, New Hampshire
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

The show is on borrowed time as Monday Night Raw has debuted on the same network so this episode really doesn’t mean anything. It’s the go home show for Anarchy Rulz but at the same time it’s featuring a three way dance for the ECW World Title with Justin Credible defending against Jerry Lynn and Steve Corino. Let’s get to it.

Lou E. Dangerously cuts off the intro and says he wrote all of Joel’s material. They even made him a Dudley and now he’ll be the death of Joel Gertner. Joel goes on a rant about how he never liked Lou in any of his characters. Now Lou is the Network’s music consultant and gay jokes are made. The “fight” is on with Joel slapping him into the corner, only to have Cyrus come in for the beatdown. Joey actually makes the save and thank goodness this isn’t the WWF or we’d get a tag match.

Opening sequence.

Joey threatens violence if Lou interferes on Sunday. Egads I’m shaking in my….well I’m not wearing shoes but I wouldn’t be shaking in them even if I was.

Here’s the whole Kid Kash vs. Rhino TV Title match from last week, plus the post match brawl with Van Dam.

Rhino dreams of breaking Van Dam’s neck.

ECW World Title: Justin Credible vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Steve Corino

Justin is defending and we see the entrances for the second week in a row. We take a break and come back for the big match intros as they might as well just put up a test patterns for all the time they’re killing here. Justin gets double teamed to start and all three wind up on the floor. Back in and Justin puts both guys down so it’s time for a chair and some swearing.

Corino fights back as this is getting a lot less heat than you would expect. Now it’s Jerry firing off right hands onto Justin’s head to bust him open. Everyone fights into the crowd for a few seconds and all three are bleeding. There’s just nothing to talk about here and it’s getting more and more obvious every second. The referee gets bumped as Jerry hits the cradle piledriver on Justin.

Cue heel referee Danny Daniels to count two and stop, allowing Justin to hit That’s Incredible……and now the referees start fighting. Of course they do. A superkick sends Jerry into another That’s Incredible for the first elimination. Way to make the #1 contender seem important ECW. So we’re down to one on one but let’s pause for Jack Victory and Francine’s interaction which goes nowhere.

Corino chops away until Justin hits him low, allowing Francine to tape him to the top rope. As in WHERE JUSTIN CAN’T PIN HIM. Well done Francine. Justin canes him a few times for two more as the fans want Sandman. Old School Expulsion on the chair gets two more with Francine making the save so here’s Dawn Marie for the catfight. Gah JUST END THIS ALREADY! That’s Incredible retains Credible’s title.

Rating: D+. Here’s the problem: why should I care about any of these guys? Lynn is the guy who has never won anything, Corino’s big deal is that he was a comedy jobber a few months ago and Credible is as uninteresting of a champion as you can find. The brawling was fine, even though they’ve made no secret of the fact that Lynn is getting the title on Sunday, making this overbooked mess a big waste of time.

CW Anderson is looking for Steve Corino and beats up Jack Victory to set up a #1 contenders match with Steve on Sunday.

Justin says he’ll beat Jerry.

Lynn is tired of making everyone else so he’ll make himself this time.

Overall Rating: D. When you have to air last week’s match to fill in time, you’ve reached the point of cutting the cord. I know it doesn’t warrant mentioning tonight as they’ve basically canceled the program at this point but the main event is where it is because of their love affair with the TV Title. Rhino might as well be World Champion at this point and it basically left the main event a glorified midcard title match. This company is clearly ready to die and it’s getting really hard to sit through these shows.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete 2014 Raw and Smackdown Reviews Part I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LY6766K#nav-subnav


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW on TNN – September 1, 2000: Unfortunately, Tournaments Are A Thing

ECW on TNN
Date: September 1, 2000
Location: Hammerstein Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

After last week, I’m really not sure what to expect from this show. This promotion goes from a fun wrestling show to some insane clip show with a bunch of wrestling that wasn’t very good to set up an angle that we’ve seen before. The next pay per view is in just over a month and I have no idea we’re going to see on the way there. Let’s get to it.

We see the end of Tajiri/Mikey Whipwreck advancing to the finals of the Tag Team Title tournament.

Opening sequence.

Joey and Joel are in the ring and the big arena does actually look cool. Joel does his rhyme about various escapades in each of the boroughs before Steve Corino comes out, flanked by Billy Corgan playing New York, New York on his guitar. I’m not sure how old school the Smashing Pumpkins were in 2000 but it’s better than Limp Bizkit.

Corino is the new #1 contender (What about Jerry?) and refuses to apologize for cheating to pin New Jack, Dusty Rhodes and Tommy Dreamer. He’s not going to apologize either when he pins Justin Credible. Cue Lou E. Dangerously and WHEN DID HE BECOME JUSTIN’S MANAGER? He’s not Justin’s manager? Well he certainly acts like him and that doesn’t help because this company makes no sense half the time with all the people running around doing random promos to advance the overall angles.

Lou yells about wanting to beat Corgan up and wants the title shot at Anarchy Rulz. A fight is about to break out when Justin Credible “sneaks” (read as Corino clearly looks over his shoulder to see him coming in) in and canes Corino. Corgan actually chokes Justin with the cane until Lou hits him in the back of the head with the phone. Lou says that’s a message from the Network. Ok so he works for the Network and not Justin? Really I’m not sure at this point and I don’t particularly care either.

Tag Team Title Tournament Quarter-Finals: Rhino/Justin Credible vs. Sandman/Chilly Willy

The winners get Jerry Lynn/Tommy Dreamer. A table is brought in less than ten seconds in but Sandman cleans house with the cane. Rhino shrugs them off and Gores Sandman through the table for two, followed by the piledriver to advance Credible and Rhino in less than two minutes. Did Willy stop for a taco?

Tag Team Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Simon and Swinger vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring

Roadkill starts fast with a powerslam on Simon but CW pulls Doring to the floor because almost every heel is part of a stable. A double Downward Spiral gets two on Doring but he grabs a double Bareback (Those names get annoying.) and makes the hot tag. Everything breaks down and Roadkill is thrown through a table, only to have Anderson hit Simon by mistake. Not that it matters as the Problem Solver puts Doring away and send Simon and Swinger to the finals.

Rating: D+. As much of a mess as most of ECW was at the end, they did have a good tag division going. Unfortunately we barely saw most of it as the matches were either clipped or had nothing on the line because of the ridiculous four month waiting period. Four weeks is a long time to not have champions but from April to September is unthinkable.

Tag Team Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Tommy Dreamer/Jerry Lynn vs. Rhino/Justin Credible

Joined in progress with separate brawls in the crowd. They’re nice enough to come back to the ring with Jerry dropping Justin but having to spank Francine instead of going for the pin. The Gore takes Dreamer out and there’s a piledriver through the table. Little Spike Dudley comes in with an Acid Drop to Rhino and the cradle piledriver puts Justin away to send Dreamer/Lynn to the finals.

Rating: D. As usual, WAY too much going on to keep track of anything here and that gets annoying in a hurry. Why do so many matches have to go into the crowd in a wild brawl or have so many people interfering? Would a straight match every now and then, especially when we’re coming up on a title shot, be too much to ask for?

Tag Team Titles: Tommy Dreamer/Jerry Lynn vs. Simon and Swinger vs. Tajiri/Mikey Whipwreck

The titles are vacant coming in and this is elimination rules. The Sinister Minister is the only manager present and Dreamer is in a neck brace. Tajiri, Lynn and Simon start things off with Simon sitting back while the other two start fast. Everyone tags out and the new three stare at each other for a bit.

Swinger stops to pose and gets put down by the physique-phobic Dreamer and Whipwreck. Everyone fights to the floor (of course) and Dreamer actually kicks Tajiri for a change of pace. Lynn takes Simon back inside for a bow and arrow hold. All six get inside again and it’s time for double Tarantulas with Lynn and Mikey being stretched.

They’re fine enough for stereo tornado DDT’s for stereo two’s on Simon and Swinger. Cue CW Anderson to hit Dreamer with something made of metal, setting up the Problem Solver for the elimination. The locker room comes out to watch as Tajiri mists Simon, setting up a Whippersnapper for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. This is the kind of match that I normally don’t care for but at least it gives us something. Tajiri and Whipwreck are still a new team but at least they’re a team instead of two people just thrown together for the sake of being thrown together. They’re fine as the new champions, especially since they’ll defend the titles against a strong tag division.

Everyone celebrates with the new champions.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s like they were trying to show a tournament in one night but didn’t have enough time. It was kind of confusing when they went from one round to the other and some brackets would have helped a lot. The finals being shown in full was the right move though and while I would have gone with Simon and Swinger, at least the titles aren’t vacant like they’ve been since a few weeks after Wrestlemania.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW on TNN – August 18, 2000: We’re Actually Doing Something!

ECW on TNN
Date: August 18, 2000
Location: War Memorial, Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re coming up on the Tag Team Title tournament and it’s actually making for an interesting story. Almost everyone is involved in the tournament, setting up a bunch of mini feuds as we head into the big night. On top of that the Network seems to have split up, which means we’re ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING. Let’s get to it.

We see Simon and Swinger helping CW Anderson beat Tommy Dreamer on Hardcore TV, setting up Danny Doring and Roadkill to make the save. The heels beat them down though and planted Jazz with a Problem Solver.

Rob Van Dam says he’s fighting Rhino tonight for the first time since he broke his ankle (no) and it’s time for a beating.

Opening sequence.

Lou E. Dangerously is in the ring with Cyrus as his guest. Cyrus rants about Steve Corino turning his back on the Network and here are Corino and Anton to interrupt. Corino doesn’t get to say anything as Cyrus says Corino was just an opening match comedy act and a mark for the business.

Then Corino got over with the people (I know ECW isn’t your normal wrestling promotion but I can’t stand it when that kind of lingo is used on TV.) and thought it was all because of the blood he’s shed. Corino swears a bit as Gertner talks about sperm. This sets up a match between Corino/Anton vs. Cyrus/Lou E. And never mind as Anton turns on Corino for a SWERVE that everyone could see coming because they’re not stupid.

FBI vs. Psicosis/Tajiri/Mikey Whipwreck

Tony and Mikey start things off and this is already starting to look like another wrestling show. It’s already off to Guido for an inverted Fujiwara armbar (Would that hurt?) as the heels (who seem to be popular) take over. The tag brings in Psicosis to face Big Sal, who is immediately taken down because he’s a big fat tub of goo.

Some kicks to the head knock him silly and a bunch of dives take down the Italians. Back in and some kicks to the head get two on Tony but he comes right back with a DDT. Guido scores with a clothesline but eats a Whippersnapper as this match is dying. Everything breaks down and Tajiri mists Psicosis by mistake. Guido hits a quick Kiss of Death for the pin on Tajiri.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was really dull. I get that it’s designed to set up something later on but the FBI isn’t interesting as they’re no longer comedy instead of just kind of there. That’s a major problem around here: people who don’t have a purpose and are only around for the sake of being around.

ECW World Title: Justin Credible vs. Kid Kash

Justin is defending in a rematch from last week. Kash gets a quick two off a spinning sunset flip to send Justin outside for an early breather. That means a lot of swearing and censoring of something that probably isn’t worthy of swearing and censoring. Justin throws a chair at Kash who sits down in the middle of the ring. A double springboard hurricanrana sends Justin outside again, setting up a huge dive off the top. Standard Kid Kash so far.

Back in and a good looking superkick (That’s our Justin!) drops Kash. A chinlock doesn’t go anywhere so Joel asks if Joey is gay for not wanting to sleep with Francine. Kash DDT’s the champ on the chair for two and there’s the ref bump. Before I can say “get Rhino out here so Van Dam can make the save”, Rhino comes out for the beatdown on Kash and Van Dam makes the save.

That’s Incredible is broken up and Kash hits the Moneymaker but the referee is still down and likely in a coma at this point. There’s a Gore for Kash so here’s Rob for the second save, only to have Justin kick out at a very close two. Francine blasts Kash with the kendo stick and a super That’s Incredible retains the title.

Rating: D+. Who thought this needed a rematch? I’m really not a fan of either guy and all the overbooking didn’t help things. At least I can finally keep track of who wants to fight who and why they want to do it but that doesn’t mean the wrestling is anything worth seeing. The ending never being in doubt didn’t help either.

TV Title: Rhino vs. Rob Van Dam

Rhino is defending and jumps Van Dam during his long entrance. They’re quickly in the crowd with Rhino in control as Bill Alfonso won’t stop with the stupid whistle. The Gore against the barricade makes things even worse for Van Dam as this is one sided so far. They get inside for the first time with a wicked powerbomb planting Van Dam again for no cover.

Rob FINALLY scores with a stepover kick and both guys are down. Van Dam skateboards a chair into Rhino’s face and a middle rope moonsault gets two. The Van Daminator sets up the Five Star but here’s Justin to break up the cover and throw the match out because you knew this wasn’t going to end clean.

Rating: C-. Again, WHY IS THIS NOT ON PAY PER VIEW??? This should be a major showdown but instead of drawing money, we’ve seen it twice in a row for the sake of popping a rating (by ECW standards of course) and this is what we’re stuck with as a result. Oh and more Justin because we haven’t seen enough of him lately.

Kid Kash fails at a save attempt so Sandman makes the real one to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I stand by my stance that Justin Credible is just crippling this show every single week. What in the world is supposed to be interesting about him? Someone taking the title off of him? That’s fine in theory, but don’t you need someone to be interesting before beating them matters? Justin continues to be the worst part of the show and unfortunately he’s also one of the focal points. No wonder I’m so sick of this show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




ECW on TNN – August 11, 2000: I…..Liked This?

ECW on TNN
Date: August 11, 2000
Location: Huntington Civic Center, Huntington, West Virginia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re getting close to wrapping this show up and it’s back to the country after a week down in Houston. The big story coming out of last week is an actual match being announced for the Tag Team Title tournament with Sandman/Chilly Willy vs. Rhino/Justin Credible. Of course no date has been announced for that match but I doubt ECW knows either. Let’s get to it.

Lou E. Dangerously is in the ring to insult the West Virginia fans, who pelt the ring with garbage as a result. This is a ripoff of Paul Heyman’s old Danger Zone segment. After a quick jump to the announcers for an intro, Lou brings out Steve Corino and Scotty Anton. Lou rants about the Tag Team Title tournament before Corino says he doesn’t give a CENSORED what the Network feels.

They helped win the Network its titles and have been protecting the Network since day one. Cue Justin, who Steve says would be nothing without the two of them. Corino and Credible both claim credit for Justin’s title reign lasting before Steve goes nuclear by saying Justin has a lame catchphrase. Rhino comes out and Gores Anton, leaving Corino to get double teamed. Security breaks it up. So is the Network done now? I’d be ok with that.

Opening sequence.

Corino and Anton are leaving when Lou comes up and asks what Cyrus will think. Steve doesn’t care and they leave with Jack Victory.

Justin Credible and Kid Kash get in an argument, setting up a title match for later tonight.

Roadkill/Danny Doring vs. Tom Marquez/Bilvis Wesley

Marquez stupidly thinks he can slam Roadkill to start, which pretty much sums up the whole match. A Vader Bomb elbow sets up a Hart Attack as Joey and Joel make Elvis jokes. We get a quick chase around the ring until Marquez catches Doring with a spinwheel kick. Wesley puts on a Muta Lock of all things and Doring stays in trouble thanks to some double teaming.

Doring finally hits a Stroke (the G Spot Sweet because we’re in ECW) and the hot tag brings in Roadkill. You really can hear a pop when Roadkill comes in and that needs to be noticed. I know he’s not your typical ECW guy but the fans dig him and that’s important. Everything breaks down and the Buggy Bang (wheelbarrow slam/guillotine legdrop) ends Marquez.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of thing you don’t get enough of around here: a basic tag match with the bigger team going over but only after taking a beating. It’s nothing great or anything but it was wrestling instead of brawling and that really needs to happen more often. Roadkill and Doring are a good act and hopefully they go somewhere in the tournament.

Sinister Minister tries to teach Tajiri about temptation with a good looking woman. She winds up getting mist in the face and you can figure out the joke yourself. You could see her face before the mist but as soon as it hits, her face is a mosaic. Ok then.

Joey is aghast.

CW Anderson gives Simon and Swinger a pep talk.

We see CW Anderson laying out Jazz and insulting women’s wrestling. Tommy Dreamer made the save.

Tajiri vs. EZ Money

They hit the mat for some very fast covers (minus near falls) and it’s a standoff for some applause. When did this become a wrestling show? Money’s friend Chris Hamrick breaks up the Tarantula and a standing moonsault gets two on Tajiri. Another distraction lets Money’s other friend Julio Fantastico (Matt Tastic’s American cousin?) sneak in for a double wheelbarrow suplex. It’s time for a chair but Tajiri reverses a powerbomb into a tornado DDT. The Buzzsaw Kick is enough to put Money away.

Rating: C. Another simple wrestling match here with the bigger name overcoming the heel stable (there are WAY too many of those running around). It’s weird seeing Money lose so often when he was on a big winning streak in the dying days of WCW. He wasn’t anything great but there was something there.

The trio goes after Tajiri but he beats up all three losers without much effort. Cue the FBI (See what I mean about the heel stables?) for the real beatdown but Mikey Whipwreck comes out with a flaming 2×4 for the save.

ECW World Title: Justin Credible vs. Kid Kash

Kash is challenging and I’ll set his over/under on hurricanranas at five. It’s a pose off to start as Gertner makes sex jokes about Francine. They fight over a hammerlock until Kash gets in a clothesline to put the champ outside. A springboard dive (now that’s more like it Kash) takes Justin down again and another dive, which we can’t see, knocks Justin into the crowd.

Back in and Justin scores with a superkick but that’s enough wrestling so let’s have a chair. Kash is sent face first into said chair and it’s time for Justin to talk some trash on the mic. For the life of me I still don’t get the appeal of this guy. The champ crotches himself on the post as the announcers try to figure out how they can like Corino now that he turned on the Network.

Francine’s interference fails as she hits Justin with a metal sheet by mistake and Kash gets in his first hurricanrana. Francine tries to interfere again (giving us the required g-string shot)….and here’s Rhino to Gore Kash for the DQ/no contest since DQ’s aren’t a thing around here most of the time.

Rating: D+. Justin isn’t interesting and I’m running out of ways to say that. He’s a catchphrase, a Tombstone and weapon shots. Oh and an occasional superkick. I have no idea why he had the title as long as he did (sixth longest reign with the original title) and I have no idea what Heyman saw in him but he’s been stale for a long time.

Rob Van Dam (Kash’s partner in the tournament) makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I…..liked this? Somehow I think I did and it’s for a few very simple reasons. This show was focused on wrestling with only the main event featuring weapons actually being used. On top of that there’s the big story of the Tag Team Title tournament coming up to really tie the show together. It’s almost like this was a well put together show and that’s a good thing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6